Monday Night Raw – March 14, 2005 (2019 Redo): Nostalgic Quality

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 14, 2005
Location: Gwinnett Center, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We continue the march towards Wrestlemania with the first of two weeks in a series called Pick Your Poison. With this show and the next show, Batista and HHH will pick each other’s opponent, starting with HHH having to face Chris Benoit. That should be rather entertaining and we get to build up towards Money in the Bank as well. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with the Highlight Reel and Chris Jericho is sitting on top of a ladder. Jericho talks about how everyone wants to climb the ladder of success and become World Champion. He’s going to get that chance again at Wrestlemania when he wins the first Money in the Bank ladder match. Yeah it’s a difficult task but that is what Wrestlemania is about.

That brings him to his guest tonight: the man who challenged the Undertaker to Wrestlemania, Randy Orton. Jericho says this is a little harder than just RKOing the Fabulous Moolah because Undertaker is undefeated at Wrestlemania. Orton understands that a lot of people don’t believe he can beat Undertaker but he’s surprised a lot of people before. We hear some of Orton’s accomplishments and Undertaker will be surprised at Wrestlemania.

Jericho likes the idea of surprises and has a surprise of his own. His other guest is a man who has faced the Undertaker at Wrestlemania and he’s from right here in Georgia: Jake Roberts. Jake is looking rather….well I guess the word here would be horrible, so thankfully we look at some of his highlights over the years, including the Alice Cooper/Jimmy Hart deal from Wrestlemania III (where he lost), the blindfold match at Wrestlemania VII (where we all lost) and…..a match against Kamala from a Saturday Night’s Main Event?

Anyway, Jake talks about knowing Orton’s grandfather and father but he doesn’t know Orton that well. Now, in baseball, you hit a baseball, in basketball you hit a three point shot and in hockey, you play hockey. What matters in all of them though is timing. Jake knows Orton is a great wrestler because he was World Champion, but since he doesn’t have the belt anymore, he must have lost it.

Tonight, Jake is here to do a favor to Orton’s father. Jake needs to reintroduce Orton’s brain to his mouth because he’s talking out of elsewhere. In case you’re a bit confused, that didn’t make the most sense when Jake was saying it either but he’s a complicated guy. Jake says it’s all about respect so Orton talks about how facing the Undertaker is about leaving the ring with your soul.

Orton asks how Jake felt after being Undertaker’s victim at Wrestlemania VIII. When Orton beats Undertaker at Wrestlemania, he’ll make a bigger impact than Jake made in his entire career. Jake goes for the snake but has to give Orton the short arm clothesline. The DDT is reversed into the RKO though, with Jake taking it far better than I would have guessed. This worked well enough, Jake’s ramblings and disjointed promo aside.

Classic Hogan Moment: Hulkamania Is Here.

Kane vs. Christian/Tyson Tomko

Fallout from last week where Kane beat Christian but got hit in the face with a ladder shot from Tomko. Christian starts for the team and gets knocked down in a hurry. A whip into the corner finally slows Kane down and it’s Tomko coming in for some right hands to the face. Christian and Tomko take turns hammering Kane down but Kane pulls Christian face first into the post. The side slam plants Tomko and the top rope clothesline makes it even worse. The chokeslam finishes Tomko with Christian not being around for the last minute plus.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as Kane almost squashed both of them in short order. Christian feels like he’s being tacked onto the ladder match and having him lose to Kane twice in a row isn’t the best way to fix things. Neither is likely to win the briefcase anyway, but did they need to have Christian look so worthless on the way there?

Post match Christian pulls out the ladder but Kane hits Tomko with it to make the statuses clear while busting Tomko open a bit.

Ric Flair sends Snitsky after Batista. I’m not sure if Batista is good enough for that one. It wouldn’t be Snitsky’s fault if he hurt Batista so badly that he was out of Wrestlemania. Snitsky says hurting Batista so badly would be ALL his fault. I don’t think they’re on the same page here.

Lita coaches Christy Hemme on defending against Trish’s kicks. William Regal and Tajiri come in for a demonstration, but Christy has to sign a Playboy to Tajiri. Regal: “He only reads the articles.” Christy tries her own kicks and Regal takes a low blow for the HILARIOUS payoff. Ok so it’s Regal so it is rather funny. Lita offers to get Regal some ice. Regal: “I NEED MORE THAN BLOODY ICE!” Lita tells Christy that wasn’t bad.

Marty Jannetty comes in to see Shawn Michaels, who thinks Marty needs a warmup before the match against Kurt Angle. That’s why tonight, for one night only, it’s a Rockers reunion.

Steve Austin highlight package for his Wrestlemania return.

Edge vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. Edge jumps Shelton from behind during the entrances and sends him into the steps. He does it again for a bonus and then hammers away inside with the referee having to drag Edge off. The referee is still cool with asking Shelton if he wants to have the match and Shelton says ring the bell. Edge sends him straight outside and we take a break twenty seconds in. Back with Shelton still in trouble as Edge isn’t quite as aggressive. To be fair you can’t be angry all the time. It’s just tiring.

Shelton is back with the top rope clothesline but can’t follow up. Shelton slugs away with a bunch of right hands against the ropes, which JR calls “Street Benjamin.” A backdrop and a running knee to the face set up the Stinger Splash but Edge moves. That’s fine with Shelton, who jumps right back off with a super sunset flip for two because he can do that. Edge’s powerslam gets two but the spear is blocked, setting up a Dragon Whip to bump the referee by mistake. Now the spear can connect but since there’s no referee, let’s go for a ladder. Cue Jericho to knock it into Edge’s face though and the exploder gives Shelton the pin.

Rating: B-. This took some time to get going but Shelton is starting to feel it out there with one big win after another. Edge can get all the more frustrated as he gets closer and closer to the big win, which almost has to be soon. Odds are we get Jericho vs. Edge out of this too so it’s a nice effort all around.

Rockers vs. La Resistance

Dig that old school music, though the lack of matching neon does hold things back a bit. Grenier and Marty exchange wristlocks to start with Jannetty grabbing a quickly broken armbar. A double hiptoss works a bit better for the French guys but Marty slides between Conway’s legs for the tag to Shawn and the tandem offense starts right back up. Stereo dives take La Resistance down again but Grenier low bridges Shawn to the floor to take over. A suplex gives Grenier two and we hit the chinlock.

Jannetty tries to come in, which just leaves Shawn to take a Hart Attack for two. Shawn punches Grenier down and throws the two of them into each other, allowing the tag off to Marty. A dropkick puts Grenier to the floor, with JR saying the mat isn’t covered with barbecue sauce. Shawn superkicks Conway as Marty hits the Rocker Dropper on Grenier for the pin.

Rating: C-. It was a nice little reunion here and that’s what makes something like this feel special. They didn’t overstay their welcome and they made it clear that this was a one off match. Not everything needs to be some big, epic return so having something that worked this easily and went pretty smoothly was a feel good moment. Now just get Marty through Smackdown before he self destructs.

Flair talks with HHH about the big Snitsky plan and seems to get HHH on board. When Batista gets beaten down, no one will remember HHH tapping out to Chris Benoit a year ago tonight!

Trish isn’t worried about Christy at Wrestlemania because she’s already ended Lita’s career. Maybe Trish should get a trainer as well. Like Hannibal Lecter for example, because she’s going to eat Christy alive (that’s a big pop). Maria thinks Christy looked impressive last week and gets beaten up.

Flair brags about Snitsky but wants him to be mean enough to hurt Batista. Cue Batista to say “Hey Ric.”, which sends Flair into a rant about how Batista can’t take anything away from HHH because HHH is the franchise. Batista smiles so Flair threatens to slap it off of his face. All Batista is coming for is the title. Flair was sounding like Mickey from Rocky here.

HHH vs. Chris Benoit

Non-title and Flair is here with HHH. The fans are right there with the YOU TAPPED OUT chants at HHH, who takes Benoit down in a bit of a surprise. Benoit wastes no time in trying for the Sharpshooter before pulling HHH away from the ropes in a crash. A headlock takes HHH down but it’s too early for the Crossface. HHH teases leaving but gets caught with a cheap shot to the face.

You don’t hit Benoit though as he’s right back with the chops and a suplex to put HHH outside again. Benoit gets knocked off the apron though and we take a break. Back with Benoit chopping his way out of the corner but walking into a spinebuster. Benoit knocks him backwards and goes up to, where he is promptly crotched right back down. The superplex drops Benoit for two but he’s right back with a catapult into the buckle, which JR says is not made of chocolate. First of all, being launched head first into chocolate can be painful. Second, get JR some dinner already as he’s talked about eating the ring twice.

They slug it out with Benoit getting smart by rolling the German suplexes. HHH gets back up and, you guessed it, more suplexes. The Swan Dive gets two so Benoit adds two more German suplexes but HHH grabs the rope for a breather. A hard whip into the corner drops Benoit but the Pedigree is countered into the Crossface.

The Flair distraction….does nothing as HHH doesn’t even tap behind the referee’s back. HHH rolls out and tries the Pedigree, which is reversed into the Sharpshooter. Flair tries to bring in the title and gets tossed, but it made Benoit release the hold. The low blow into the Pedigree gives HHH the pin.

Rating: B+. These two have some awesome chemistry together and it’s rare to see HHH beat him (though it wasn’t the first time as commentary kept talking about). Benoit is someone who could be reinserted into the World Title picture at any time and have a great match with anyone, making him as useful as almost anyone on the roster. This was one of the better TV matches in a long and they were both working very hard.

Randy Orton will be on Smackdown to sign the contract with Undertaker.

Wrestlemania rundown. That card is looking pretty awesome.

Here are Hassan and Daivari to make the same complaints they always make, this time because Hassan isn’t on Wrestlemania.

Christy stays with Maria while Lita goes off to run into Snitsky, who promises to finish what he started with her. Uh, what exactly did he start?

Batista vs. Gene Snitsky

Flair and HHH come out to watch and somehow Flair is the sweatier of the two. Snitsky tells Batista to try the shoulder but gets head faked and clotheslined. As usual, Batista is the smartest person on the show. A shout at Flair takes too long and Snitsky gets up a boot in the corner. Snitsky wraps the leg around the post and drops some elbows onto it for painful measure. The pumphandle powerslam gives Snitsky two so Batista kicks him outside. The comeback is on with some corner clotheslines and the spinebuster, which draws Flair in the DQ.

Rating: D. I said Batista is smart but he’s not a miracle worker. There is only so much that he can do against someone like Snitsky, whose one big move was used up in less than three minutes. This was another backfiring plan from Flair and HHH so Batista keeps looking strong, though the DQ would have been just about the same as a regular fall.

Post match Batista shrugs Flair off but the three villains all get in with chairs. Cue Kane to go after Snitsky so Batista can take out Flair as HHH leaves. HHH makes Batista vs. Kane for next week.

Overall Rating: B. This was a better show than they’ve done in a few months now with a good balance of wrestling and nostalgia, which you don’t get very often. Batista continues to look awesome and Wrestlemania could be a great card if everything lives up to its potential. Roberts and Jannetty were some rather nice surprises and fit in very well with the rest of the show. Very strong show as the build to Wrestlemania is clicking at the right time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Smackdown – August 13, 2019: Maybe The Worst Is Over

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: August 13, 2019
Location: Scotiabank Arena, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s the final night in Toronto and we’re already starting on the path towards Clash of Champions. As for tonight though, we have the first round of fallout from last week’s revelation that Rowan tried to take out Roman Reigns. Since Buddy Murphy was the one to tell Reigns the news, that means Murphy faces Reigns tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here are Sunday’s results if you need a recap.

Here’s Kevin Owens to open us up and the fans are rather happy to see him. The cheers go on long enough that Owens has to pause before saying anything. Yesterday was five years to the day since he signed with WWE. Over those five years he has created and experienced things he will never forget. He’s been in the ring with people he’s looked up to for years and on Sunday he was in the ring with someone who calls themselves the Best in the World.

As inaccurate as that was, it was special because Owens’ family was ringside to see him in the ring. That Stunner will be with him for the rest of his life, but now it’s time to set his sights on the King of the Ring tournament. He has been a fan his whole life and he loved watching the tournament growing up. Winning the tournament would mean much as anything he has won so far in WWE. We get the usual list of great names to have won, including Owen Hart.

Cue Shane McMahon and Owens actually falls down onto his knees as the music hits. Owens: “Why? Why?” Shane isn’t happy with the loss but shows us a shot of Owens kicking him low on Sunday. Is that what it means to be a man? Owens isn’t going to be lectured about being a man by someone who was part of the Mean Street Posse.

Being a man is doing whatever it takes to keep your job, but Shane says Owens is nothing but a cheater. Owens will be wrestling later tonight but first, we need to see a clip of Owens attacking Elias with a chair. That’s going to cost Owens $100,000 and that does not sit well with him. He demands Shane reconsider, but Shane says nope and leaves.

Post break Owens goes into Shane’s office where he threatens him with a lawsuit if Owens hits him. Owens says we’ll make it 105 and throws a stool into a TV.

Charlotte vs. Ember Moon

Neither gets an entrance. Charlotte pulls her down by the hair to start and works on a headlock. An elbow to the face drops Moon again but she’s back up with a headscissors to try and change things up a bit. Charlotte gets knocked outside but Ember takes her down with a kick through the ropes.

The springboard dive connects with Charlotte, who sends Moon straight into the apron as we take a break. Back after what seemed like a longer than usual break with Ember holding her knee on the floor. That means it’s time for some knees to the leg but it’s too early for the Figure Eight. Instead Charlotte goes with a Liontamer for a JERICHO chant. Charlotte switches back to the knee with some cannonballs down onto it as she channels her dad.

Moon moves away from the last one and starts throwing knees. A kick to the chest gets two, followed by a bottom rope Codebreaker for the same. The Eclipse misses but so does the spear into the corner, allowing Moon to hit a superkick for two more. Charlotte is back up with the big boot though and it’s the Figure Eight to make Ember tap at 11:43.

Rating: B-. Moon is getting more entertaining in the ring but she still hasn’t had that big win. What worries me is that we seem almost destined for another Charlotte title feud, which she is likely to win because nine title reigns in four years just isn’t enough. Even if Bayley beats her, how long before Charlotte gets it back from someone else? It’s how things work with her and since there is little else for her to do, this is what we get.

Video on the Roman Reigns attacks and Buddy Murphy blaming Rowan.

Here are Rowan and Daniel Bryan for a chat. It’s clear that someone is out to get Reigns but neither of them had anything to do with the attacks. All that matters is Murphy is a liar but Bryan doesn’t blame him for what he said. Any one of you would cave if Reigns held you against a wall and Murphy had to give a name. The problem is Murphy gave the wrong name. The fans say Bryan did it and Bryan says that’s what’s wrong with society. A lie is spread all over social media and then it becomes the truth. They had nothing to do with it and tonight they’ll prove it.

Samoa Joe comes in to Shane’s office because he’s going to be facing Owens tonight. That could be interesting.

Aleister Black talks about the due sin around him, but he will soon find a way out for everyone in the locker room. All they have to do is knock.

Buddy Murphy vs. Roman Reigns

Roman doesn’t like being shoved in the face to start so he hits an uppercut. Murphy is right back with a jumping knee to the face for an early two and the stomping is on in the corner. They head outside with Reigns being sent into the barricade a few times so he throws Murphy hard over the announcers’ table. Murphy sends him into the steps though and comes back with knees off the apron as we take a break.

Back with Reigns fighting out of a chinlock and hitting a powerbomb out of the corner. Reigns hits the clotheslines in the corner and a big boot puts Murphy down. The spear goes into the post though and Murphy gets two off a rollup. Reigns is sent outside for the big running flip dive (which looked great) and the top rope Meteora gets two back inside. A Superman Punch out of nowhere gives Reigns two but Murphy hits a series of knees to the face. The brainbuster gives Murphy two and he goes up top, with a Superman Punch knocking him back down. Reigns hits a spear for the pin at 13:40.

Rating: B. This felt similar to last night’s Cedric Alexander vs. Drew McIntyre match as a young star gets a chance on the show against a hard hitting big man. Ok so it sounds very similar but that’s a good idea when it makes for a strong match on both nights. Murphy looked like a star here, though I’m not sure why it took four months for his first match.

Revival is here to face New Day because they want to prove that things can be serious.

Xavier Woods is upset that he isn’t in the King of the Ring tournament but they don’t like the Revival saying they have ruined the tag team division. They’ve ruined their dinners, Christmas and that adult circumcision but never the tag division. Kofi isn’t worried about what he did to Randy Orton after their match on Sunday because he was protecting their family. As for tonight, he’ll be out there supporting his brothers.

Samoa Joe vs. Kevin Owens

Hold on though as Elias is the outside enforcer referee (with the 24/7 Title rules suspended for the match). Owens starts fast with a dropkick and a clothesline but Joe bails to the floor before the Cannonball. Elias won’t let Owens dive off the apron so Joe takes Owens down by the leg as we go to an early break.

Back with Joe charging into an elbow in the corner and getting dropped with a middle rope dropkick. The backsplash gives Owens two and the Swanton is good for the same. The Stunner is countered into a Koquina Clutch but Owens slips out. Now it’s the Pop Up Powerbomb connecting but Elias pulls the referee out at two. Elias gets in for the staredown so Joe can grab a rollup for the fastest three ever at 5:42.

Rating: C. The action was good while it lasted but my goodness I’m sick of the corrupt authority figure stacking the deck motif. I know the criticism is that we’ve seen it for years and that’s pretty accurate. This was the same thing that we’ve seen dozens of times with nothing really changing other than the people involved. The sooner we can move on from this stuff the better, because the horse has been dead so long it’s already compost.

Bryan and Rowan go into the locker room and tell everyone but Murphy to get out. Bryan gets right in his face and demands that Murphy admit that he lied. Rowan hits Murphy in the face and pins him against the wall, with Bryan wanting Murphy to admit that he lied. Murphy admits it and Rowan lets him go, but Bryan says he hates liars. That earns Murphy a trip into the garbage.

Video on King of the Ring.

New Day vs. Revival

Woods and Big E. for New Day here but before we’re ready to go, here’s Orton to talk about Summerslam. Kofi couldn’t beat him ten years ago and he couldn’t do it on Sunday so he snapped in front of his family. One day Kofi’s sons are going to grow up and Kofi is going to have to tell them that he couldn’t beat Orton. Kofi can have one more chance though: make this a six man tag. It seems to be on.

Randy Orton/Revival vs. New Day

Kofi and Orton start with Orton tagging out to Dawson before anything happens. A monkey flip and dropkick have Dawson in trouble and it’s off to Woods, with Big E. wheelbarrowing him into a splash for two. Wilder comes in and gets headscissored down for two but Dawson makes the blind tag. That’s fine with Woods, who rolls him up as well, only to have Wilder take Woods down by the arm. The armbar goes on before Wilder comes back in for one of his own.

Woods fights up and hits a discus forearm but gets taken into the corner again. Orton drops him onto the announcers’ table and we take a break. Back with Woods’ arm still in trouble and Dawson doing the rather tired taunt of mocking the clap. Another armbar is more his speed but Woods gets up and brings in Big E. for the house cleaning. The Warrior Splash hits Wilder for two as everything breaks down. Kofi dives onto Orton, leaving Woods to take the Shatter Machine for the pin at 11:53.

Rating: C-. The armbars got a bit repetitive after awhile and that made the match feel longer than it would have otherwise. You can see where they’re going with all six of them for Clash of Champions and that makes sense, as New Day doesn’t have any challengers on Smackdown at the moment. Maybe Kofi vs. Orton can be better the next time around too.

Post match Orton gives New Day an RKO each.

Roman comes in to see Bryan and Rowan, who have been conducting their own investigation. Next week, they’ll bring the one who did it to Reigns.

Overall Rating: B-. It wasn’t as good as Raw but they moved things forwards on most accounts. That might not be the most thrilling in every case but at least they have a direction and aren’t as boring as they were before. Couple that with some rather good action (a trend as of late for both shows) and this was one of the better Smackdowns in a while. The shows aren’t perfect yet but you would have a hard time believing they were as bad as they were about six weeks ago. I’ll certainly take that change as the old ones were almost unwatchable. There’s more to do but the hard part seems to be over.

Results

Charlotte b. Ember Moon – Figure Eight

Roman Reigns b. Buddy Murphy – Spear

Samoa Joe b. Kevin Owens – Rollup

Revival/Randy Orton b. New Day – Shatter Machine to Kingston

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – July 16, 2007: The Time Machine Show

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 16, 2007
Location: American Bank Arena, Corpus Christi, Texas
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This was a request and one of several shows I’ve been asked to do from this era. It’s one of the times that I don’t remember very well whatsoever, which is always a fun thing to see. We’re less than a month removed from the Chris Benoit tragedy and that means things have kind of reset a bit. This is the go home show for the Great American Bash so we’ll get some buildup for a not very important pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

HHH’s (who has been gone since January due to a torn quad) music starts us off but it’s King Booker and Queen Sharmell instead. There is one king around here and that is of course King Booker. Oh sorry. King Book-ah. However, there is someone who seems interested in a claim to the crown, which brings Booker to Lawler. Since Book-ah is the real king, Lawler must cease referring to himself as such. Lawler isn’t buying that as, you know, he’s been the King for thirty years.

That’s not cool with Booker, because a kingdom divided cannon stand. Lawler finally gives in and says he won’t call himself the King anymore, but Booker wants him to kiss the ring. Shockingly enough, that’s not happening so Booker orders Lawler. That’s enough to get Lawler to his feet so Book-ah punches him in the face, only to have Lawler get in a few shots of his own as we’re likely to have a match tonight. Nice segment, with Booker logically being annoyed at another king.

Ric Flair picks John Cena to beat Bobby Lashley at the Great American Bash. This seems to be a theme tonight.

Lawler looks ready to fight.

We look back at Umaga destroying Santino Marella last week to retain the Intercontinental Title.

Jeff Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Santino Marella vs. William Regal

Elimination rules with the winner getting a shot at Umaga on Sunday. Charlie Haas is here with Shelton. This is before Santino had become a comedy goof so he’s just a boring guy in trunks at the moment. Santino and Regal fight to the floor with Jeff fighting out of the corner until stereo crossbodies put he and Shelton down. Regal and Marella get back in with Santino punching Shelton down until Regal hits the knee trembler to get rid of Santino for the first elimination.

Jeff hammers on Regal in the corner but gets caught with an electric chair from Shelton. We take a break and come back with Jeff getting double suplexed, leaving Regal and Benjamin to argue over the pin. In an elimination match because they’re not that bright. Regal throws Benjamin down with a suplex and drops a knee on Jeff for two. A collision out of the corner puts Regal and Benjamin down so Jeff is back up to some VERY high pitched cheers. Benjamin gets kicked to the floor but Jeff misses the slingshot dropkick in the corner. The knee trembler misses Jeff though and it’s a Twist of Fate to get us down to two.

Benjamin is right back in with a top rope Blockbuster for two and the fans are rather pleased on the kickout. A Whisper in the Wind sends Shelton outside and Jeff dives onto Haas and Benjamin. The Swanton misses though because Jeff can’t keep the momentum going for that long. Shelton loads up a piledriver but gets rolled up to give Jeff the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C. Hardy was the only realistic winner here and a match against the monster should be a good moment. This just felt a little more energized than most modern matches and that made for a nice opener. The ans were completely behind Hardy here and it’s easy to see why he was going to get the rocket attached to his back very soon.

Edge isn’t sure on Cena vs. Lashley because he has no history with Lashley. He has history with Cena and can’t stand him, but he knows how tough Cena is. Cena retains.

Randy Orton has challenged Cody Rhodes to a match tonight and it’s time to kill a legend before it starts (Cody only debuted earlier in the month and hasn’t actually wrestled yet). Vince McMahon would agree these days. Orton is ready to destroy Dusty Rhodes on Sunday and wants him out there tonight for a preview.

Maria tries to make Santino feel better because he’s not a loser. Santino talks about watching Transformers and thinks he feels like he doesn’t belong here. Then she makes him feel better. Come spend the night with him and he’ll make her pancakes in the morning. She’s good with that.

Batista can’t decide but goes with Lashley. The fans are the winners though.

The bald Snitsky likes to hurt people as much as he likes to win matches. It’s weird but he can’t help himself. His opponents’ pain is his pleasure.

Snitsky vs. Val Venis

Val still had a job in 2007??? Venis gets a boot up in the corner to start but gets sent chest first into the buckle to put him in trouble. The pumphandle slam finishes Val in a hurry.

Post match Val gives him a second pumphandle slam. Commentary focusing on Snitsky’s bad teeth show you how far he’s going to go.

Cody is ready for his in-ring debut but knows he can never be a bigger star than his dad. You can’t RKO away Dusty’s legacy but as for tonight, Cody is going to make a first impression.

Lawler is in the ring with a bull rope for a preview of Orton vs. Dusty in Sunday’s Texas Bull rope match. The rules are explained with Lawler talking about how many horrible, violent things he’s seen Dusty do in these matches over the years. And then Orton comes out for his match.

Video on Orton being a psycho and punting various people in the head.

Randy Orton vs. Cody Rhodes

This is Cody’s in-ring debut, which is almost hard to fathom. Dusty is out with Cody, as he should be. Cody gets in a left hand to the jaw to start but gets clotheslined down as the beating begins. Orton drops him ribs first across the top rope and Dusty is looking rather concerned, as he should.

The comeback is cut off by a snap powerslam and some forearms to the chest make it even worse. Orton grabs the chinlock for a bit until Cody fights up with right hands and a missile dropkick for two. That’s it again though as Orton grabs the backbreaker and Dusty’s emotional roller coaster continues. The RKO connects to finally put Cody away.

Rating: D+. This was a glorified squash as Cody wasn’t going to be any kind of threat. What kept my attention here was Dusty, who worked the crowd into a near frenzy, just by going through every possible emotion in a seven minute match. The look on his face when Cody was making his comeback and then getting the near fall sold the whole thing, because Dusty can sell you anything he wants without breaking a sweat. Not a good match, but great emotion.

Post match Orton loads up the Punt but Dusty breaks it up.

Steve Austin picks Cena but really isn’t sure.

Melina vs. Mickie James

Rating: D+. The women’s division was trying at this point and this was one of the better matchups they had, but what can you do in about three minutes? Candice wasn’t the most intimidating champion so they weren’t building to much, but they were certainly trying to get somewhere at this point so points for giving it a shot.

Smackdown Rebound.

Regal comes in to see Jim Duggan to talk about Jonathan Coachman liking Duggan’s board. This turns into a series of jokes about hard things going into Regal’s hand. Ron Simmons comes in for the joke, which is still funny.

Mick Foley picks Lashley because Cena has to lose at some point.

Carlito vs. Sandman

2007 was weird as this is fallout from Sandman caning Carlito last week. Sandman works on a wristlock for the token wrestling so Carlito slugs him down. The neck crank goes on until Sandman comes back for a slam, only to have Regal come in for the DQ (as Sandman caned him last week as well).

Duggan makes the save, setting up a nightmare of a tag match that I need to see.

JBL picks Cena for the experience.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Super Crazy

Rematch from two weeks ago when Kennedy ran his mouth too long and got pinned. Kennedy beat the fire out of him backstage last week to make himself feel better. Kennedy does his own entrance, while Super Crazy’s theme sums him up well: “I’M SUPER! I’M CRAZY! I’M SUPER CRAZY!”

An early shoulder puts Crazy down to start but he dropkicks the knee and hammers away in the corner. Kennedy punches him into the other corner and grabs an abdominal stretch to slow things down. With Lawler explaining that it hurts your abdominals, Crazy comes back with a slam and two of the three moonsaults. The third is broken up with a crotching though and a reverse superplex gives Kennedy the pin.

Rating: D. Well that was a big waste of a few weeks. Was there any need to have Kennedy deal with Super Crazy over the course of three weeks? Super Crazy was a jobber to the stars at best and that’s a lot less than what Kennedy should be doing. It was a nothing match too, as Kennedy won after shrugging off anything Crazy did. I don’t get this one and I think we’ll keep it that way.

Great American Bash rundown.

We look back at HHH tearing his quad in January. He’s coming back at Summerslam, apparently now as the Six Million Dollar Man (who was named Steve Austin on the show).

Coach is on the stage to moderate an in-ring podium debate between Cena and Lashley. Cena gets a very high pitched reaction. First up, we look at Cena getting speared during the recent contract signing. Cena is asked if he feels that his title reign is ending on Sunday, which is actually a year. It sounds like Cena is about to cry because that spear two weeks ago REALLY HURT. There’s no way he can win the match and the worst part is he never learned to read. Cena: “God bless America.”

That has to be a topical reference, though I get the “I award you no points” part. We get serious with Cena admitting that Lashley is more athletic than him, but he’s fought the best before. He’s won some and lost some but on Sunday, Lashley is getting Cena’s best. Lashley says if we want someone to hype the match, let Cena the hype man do it. He turns the podium over and says he’ll be ready to fight when Cena is done talking.

The fight is teased but Coach says this isn’t happening on his show. Lashley goes up the ramp but Cena says Lashley needs to be ready for the biggest match of his career. So he needs to get ready for Wrestlemania again? Cena knows that Lashley has a great resume and on Sunday he’ll put it to the test. Lashley comes back down and the fight is on to end the show. Good segment as they’re making Lashley feel like a real threat.

Overall Rating: D+. This was a weird look into the time capsule that was 2007. There were some rather strange characters and feuds in there, with stuff like Sandman, Super Crazy and Jim Duggan of all people getting TV time. Cena vs. Lashley felt like a one off match and while it felt big, it didn’t feel like it was going to be a game changed. The problem is that the Cena vs. Lashley stuff is just about the only good part of the entire show, which is from a completely forgotten time in the company’s history.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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Main Event – August 8, 2019: What Else It Could Be

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: August 8, 2019
Location: PPG Paints Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Renee Young

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Dana Brooke vs. Sarah Logan

Given that this is I believe their fifth match in eight or so weeks, you can see what I mean about the company’s lack of interest. They fight over a top wristlock with Logan pulling her down by the hair. Brooke is right back with some rapid fire shots in the corner but gets pulled throat first into the middle rope for two. A sliding knee gives Logan two and it’s off to the standing Cloverleaf. That’s broken up but it’s a suplex out of the corner to drop Logan again. The cartwheel splash gets two but Logan is right back with a German suplex. Not that it matters as Brooke hits an enziguri into the Swanton for the pin at 6:17.

Rating: C. What makes this even worse is that the match was pretty good for their standards, probably due to the amount of practice they have against each other. The problem is they’re just thrown out there exclusively, meaning they have no way to learn how to do anything but do the same match over and over again. Again, because Main Event is nothing.

From Raw.

Becky Lynch/Charlotte vs. Trish Stratus/Natalya

Yeah this could work to start. Becky tries the Disarm-Her early on but Natalya blocks it without too much effort. Natalya’s cross armbreaker is reversed into a rollup, with a lot of Ronda Rousey references. Charlotte tags herself in and goes for Natalya’s arm but gets sunset flipped for two.

There’s a big boot to Natalya and Charlotte wants to fight Trish. The neck crank goes onto Natalya instead and Charlotte teases a tag to Becky before going right back to Natalya. A loud elbow to the face staggers Natalya but she kicks Charlotte into the corner off of a rollup. It’s a failed Sharpshooter attempt instead of a tag though, only to have Natalya clothesline Charlotte down.

That’s still not enough for the tag, as Charlotte knocks Trish off the apron. Becky tags herself in so Charlotte hits her from behind and walks out. Natalya gets the Sharpshooter on Becky but a rope is grabbed in a hurry, but Natalya doesn’t let go for the DQ at 7:10. Trish was never in the match.

Rating: C-. Not much to see here with Trish only being teased before Sunday. I still can’t bring myself to care about Natalya in the role though and really why should I really? It’s hard to believe that she’s going to win the title and after all these years of being indifferent to her, what’s the point in buying it here?

Post match Trish breaks the Sharpshooter but gets shoved away.

Video on Brock Lesnar destroying Seth Rollins last week.

From Raw again.

Here are Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman for a chat. Heyman is here to educate everyone here both live and at home and that means it’s time for some questions. Wasn’t Seth Rollins supposed to be the Beast Slayer? The Conqueror’s Conqueror? The one who had Lesnar’s number? Rollins is supposed to be the big hero for the new generation. We see a clip of Lesnar annihilating Rollins last week and badly damaging his ribs. Back in the arena, Heyman talks about the beating from last week being near criminal. Rollins is here in Pittsburgh tonight though, which makes Lesnar smirk.

Cue Rollins, limping badly and holding a chair for support. Rollins gets in and is kicked right in the ribs as Lesnar takes the chair away. That means a chair to the ribs and Rollins gets driven hard into the corner. The slow beating is on with Rollins’ charge being cut off with another knee to the ribs. There’s the F5 and Lesnar poses with the title. They seem to be building towards Rollins getting the title back on Sunday but I don’t buy it.

Back in the arena, Rollins is still in the ring but isn’t interested in a stretcher ride. Instead he grabs the mic and says he’s gotten to the point of asking himself if this is worth it. His answer is yes because this is all he has. He’ll be at Summerslam and he’ll beat Brock. He guarantees a win and very slowly hobbles to the back.

Video on the attacks on Roman Reigns that even have Samoa Joe worried.

From Smackdown.

Roman Reigns goes into the locker room and tells everyone to get out….except Buddy Murphy. Reigns saw Murphy there last week near the fork lift and wants to know if he did it. Murphy doesn’t know what Reigns is talking about so Reigns threatens violence. If Murphy knew who did it, he wouldn’t tell Reigns a thing. Reigns punches him in the face and throws him hard onto a table, still asking who did it. Murphy says Rowan did it and he didn’t see Bryan involved. We cut back to the ring where Bryan and Rowan don’t say anything to end the show. That was a little lacking, but points for going with something a bit different than expected.

Zack Ryder/Curt Hawkins vs. Revival

This is what the Shane McMahon association gets you. To mess with you even more, somehow this is a Wrestlemania rematch from just four months ago. Hawkins and Wilder start things off with a headlock having Curt in some trouble. A headlock takeover breaks that up and it’s off to Ryder as commentary actually tries to break this match down, which is far more attention than you would expect it to get. Revival heads to the floor and it’s a double dropkick through the ropes to send us to a break.

Back with Ryder in trouble, including a double slingshot into the middle rope. The chinlock keeps Ryder in trouble and it’s an assisted suplex for two. Ryder’s suplex into a neckbreaker gets him out of trouble though and it’s back to Hawkins to clean house. Everything breaks down and it’s a Shatter Machine to finish Ryder at 10:02.

Rating: D+. What even is the tag division anymore? These teams were literally fighting for the titles in front of 80,000 people four months ago and now they’re the warmup match for a show they’re rarely on. It’s a bad sign for what happens to tag teams and a good illustration of why a lot of indy teams would be nuts to come here.

We look at Dolph Ziggler accidentally signing to face Goldberg.

Video on Becky Lynch vs. Natalya.

From Smackdown.

Kofi Kingston talks about getting here in spite of Randy Orton. He was starting to stand out in his feud with Orton but then Orton might have used his influence to hold him back. Now Kofi has succeeded no matter what and he has proven that he is worthy to be here. We see Kofi going back to Ghana to show how far he has come but he wants vindication by beating Orton at Summerslam.

From Smackdown one more time.

It’s time for the Kevin Owens Show with Owens wasting no time in calling out Shane McMahon. Shane comes out and has Greg Hamilton do the intro, which Owens cancels in a hurry. Owens has been asked a lot of things over the last few weeks, as the fans are wondering why Shane’s career isn’t on the line as well. The answer is simple: he’s a McMahon and can do whatever he wants. Owens has an appeal to Shane though: put up his career against Owens and give the fans what they want.

That’s not happening as Shane has Owens where he wants him. Shane talks about how he could beat Owens in a variety of ways but Owens calls him out for a lack of testicular fortitude. They’re ready to fight right now but here’s Elias for a distraction. They head outside with another Elias distraction earning him a Stunner on the announcers’ table. That’s enough for Shane to get in some shots from behind and turn the announcers’ table on him. Shane dropkicks a chair into his face to leave Owens laying. Shane got to talk here and it was like a terrifying flashback.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling was nothing (shocking I know) but the build to Summerslam worked well with most of the big matches getting some attention. As usual, this show is much more useful when they focus on both shows at once and that’s what they did here. This was the kind of show that they need Main Event to be, since they aren’t going to use it for anything but a recap.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Summerslam 2019 Preview

IMG Credit: WWE

It’s the second biggest show of the year (in theory I guess but that’s for another time) and this year’s show….isn’t really that big. For once we only have ten matches scheduled over six hours, but you can probably guess another match or two being added at the last minute. The build for this one has been a bit all over the place as the TV shows are transitioning to the Paul Heyman and Eric Bischoff era and since we’ve had four weeks since Extreme Rules (including Raw Reunion), it hasn’t had time to be fleshed out. Maybe they can pull off something good so let’s get to it.

Bray Wyatt vs. Finn Balor

We’ll start off with what should be a pretty easy one. This is Wyatt’s first match back in about a year and now he’s the Fiend, which is the first major change for Wyatt in a very long time. It’s basically his evil side and while that might seem a little redundant, it’s better than bringing Sister Abigail up again, though you know that’s’ coming one day.

As for the match itself, it isn’t going to be in much doubt. Balor is reportedly taking some time off soon so he’s not going to win here, as even WWE isn’t dumb enough…..ok so they are but I don’t think they’ll have Wyatt lose his first match back. The Fiend is a good choice for him and if they do it right, they could have a very evil monster on their hands. Wyatt wins, and he should do so again in a rematch against the Demon.

Goldberg vs. Dolph Ziggler

Let’s just get this one out of the way early. For some reason WWE thinks the fans want to see Ziggler mock the legends and then get beaten up by one so they can trot out Goldberg again to make up for the horrible Super ShowDown match. I’m sure Ziggler will sell the spear rather well and Goldberg will look awesome, but my goodness this might have been the biggest waste of time I can remember this side of a Baron Corbin push.

So yeah they’re not going to do anything stupid here as Ziggler is scheduled for more comedy shows in the near future and probably needs to go away again for those, meaning some of my medications can go away for the time being. Sidebar: how does Ziggler not qualify for Legend status? Two World Titles, eight midcard titles, Money in the Bank, wrestles part time and he’ll be forty next year. I’m sure it’s in the fine print somewhere but whatever gets him out of here faster is what matters most.

Cruiserweight Title: Drew Gulak(c) vs. Oney Lorcan

Another month with another Cruiserweight Title match all but destined to wind up on the Kickoff Show. This was only set up on Tuesday but Lorcan has been the obvious challenger for weeks now. Lorcan is a hard hitter and someone who will go head first at Gulak the whole way, though that might not be the smartest thing in the world to do against a submission expert.

That hole in Lorcan’s strategy is why I’ll go with Gulak to retain. He’s got something with this new, serious character and while Lorcan is good, he’s not the one to take the title off of Gulak, who shouldn’t be losing for a long time. I’m not sure who does take the title off of him, but it’s not Lorcan and certainly not in this spot.

SmackDown Women’s Title: Bayley(c) vs. Ember Moon

Despite having held the title for most of the summer, Bayley is in a bad place as champion at the moment. She’s winning matches and getting some credibility back, but it’s the same place that Seth Rollins and Kofi Kingston were for months: as long as the big star (Charlotte in her case), it doesn’t feel like this is a reign that particularly matters. It feels like we’re waiting for Charlotte to get the title back and that makes a lot of these matches feel less important.

That being said, Bayley wins pretty handily here as there is no reason to believe that Moon is going to take the title from her. Moon feels like a challenger of the month and while she has the biggest weapon around, I don’t think it’s going to hit Bayley. After this they might do a rematch, but odds are it’s going to come back around to Charlotte sooner or later, because that’s how women’s titles work in WWE (because her dad is Ric Flair and she has to win a bunch of titles you see).

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch(c) vs. Natalya

Yay Canada! Is there any other reason to put this match on the card? Natalya has never been interesting in her WWE career and this will be no exception. She can go out there and have a passable if not good match with anyone, but putting her in one of the highest profile matches of the year doesn’t exactly seem like the most intriguing idea. The promos haven’t worked and even making it a submission match doesn’t do them much good.

Of course Lynch retains because what else are they going to do? The problem here is that there isn’t anyone else for Lynch to face as she’s beaten Lacey Evans and….well who else is there? Alexa Bliss? The women’s divisions aren’t deep at the moment so I can understand Natalya getting the spot, but that doesn’t really make it better. The match should be good, but it isn’t something that is going to draw a lot of interest.

Kevin Owens vs. Shane McMahon

Has anyone else noticed that less McMahon on the show has made it that much easier to watch? McMahon is still around but he hasn’t been the focal point of the whole thing as of late and I don’t think it’s any surprise that things are at least a little better. I’m sure we’ll be seeing more of him after this, but if Owens loses he’s off of the show. Again: I’m sure.

This seems to be a pretty easy layup and I’ll take Owens for what should be the win. Owens can set up a rematch where McMahon’s power is on the line to get rid of him for good, but he can’t do that if he loses here. What matters most is getting McMahon’s screen time down (not eliminated mind you) and Owens beating him would be a good first step in that direction. Owens wins in one of the most likely picks of the show.

US Title: AJ Styles(c) vs. Ricochet

Of course they’re fighting again because they only had three matches in the span of a few weeks. There is plenty of time left to drive a feud into the ground before people get sick of it. Styles turned heel and joined up with the OC again to get the title and now Ricochet needs to fight back and get his big moment. Winning the title was nice but winning it back at Summerslam is what would make him seem like a star.

That’s what I think is happening too, as Styles certainly doesn’t need the title and Ricochet has everything to gain here. The OC is the kind of stable that can do a bunch of stuff without the title, especially when they already have the Raw Tag Team Titles. Ricochet needs this one and I think WWE knows what kind of potential they have with him. Give him the title back and let him run with the thing for a few months.

Trish Stratus vs. Charlotte

It’s pretty rare to have an actual dream match but that’s what they’ve done here. Charlotte has dominated the women’s divisions since showing up about four years ago and has a serious claim to being the best ever. Then again so does Stratus, who is viewed as one of the goddesses of women’s wrestling. Putting Charlotte in there against her, in Stratus’ hometown no less, could be a rather big moment.

This is Charlotte’s to win and I don’t see any reason to consider the alternative. You don’t bring Stratus out of retirement for the one big singles match and then have her win, so let her go out in a fight and come close to beating Charlotte, only to come up short and show that Charlotte is better. Just keep Charlotte away from the title because we’ve more than covered that one already.

SmackDown World Title: Kofi Kingston(c) vs. Randy Orton

How did we get here? How in the world is Kingston the WWE Champion with a four month reign? This is the match that should have rocketed Kingston up to the main event scene about ten years ago but Orton didn’t see it that way so Kingston took the long route. This has been the best built match on the show and you could easily seeing it being the best match on the show, assuming Orton is motivated.

I’m going with Kingston to retain here but there is going to be a rematch. Eventually I think Orton does take the title from him, but Kingston has been playing with the house’s money since the night he won the title. Who would have expected him to be champion for this long and actually make it into a decent length reign? It has to end sometime, but that won’t be on Sunday.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar(c) vs. Seth Rollins

And then there’s this too because we’re right back to WrestleMania and pretending the summer didn’t happen. Rollins had a lot of things working against him during his title reign and Lesnar was a big one, but enough of the problems are likely going to be put on him, meaning I don’t know when he’s going to get the title back.

What I do likely know is that it won’t be Sunday so I’m going with Lesnar to retain. That makes the most sense from WWE’s perspective at the moment (mainly because they have set it up so that Lesnar is the only real option to carry the title until someone, likely named Roman Reigns, gets to take it from him again). WWE is going to want Lesnar as champion when they move to FOX so he keeps it here, as he probably should.

Overall Thoughts

The more I think about it, the better this show is starting to sound. While you can all but guarantee a few matches being added (Reigns vs. Rowan (or at least a segment about them) and Drew McIntyre vs. Cedric Alexander seem to be locks), it sounds very nice to have a shortened card that isn’t overflowing with stuff most people don’t want to see. They have a long way to go to beat last year’s show but maybe they’ve got a trick or two left.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2016 (2017 Redo): The Wrestling Match

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2016
Date: August 21, 2016
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 15,974
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, David Otunga, John Bradshaw Layfield

A year has passed since I saw this show and I can barely remember much about it. That’s very telling when you look at how stacked this show really is. There are multiple top level matches here and it really wasn’t clear what was going to close the show until the night of the event. Hopefully that means that this SIX HOUR show holds up. Let’s get to it.

So here’s a quick plug. I’m going through the pre-show and there’s a three expert panel of Booker T., Jerry Lawler and Lita. Earlier this year, I met all three of them at WrestleCon. If you’re ever at a Wrestlemania weekend, treat yourself to an amazing time and GO TO WRESTLECON. I met over 120 wrestlers in about four hours. Where else are you going to get to do something like that? Anyway, on with the show.

Pre-Show: American Alpha/Hype Bros/Usos vs. Breezango/Ascension/Vaudevillains

Who would have thought that Breezango would be the most entertaining out of all these teams? This is pretty much the still titleless Smackdown tag division at this point as they had to bring in the Headbangers and throw together Heath Slater and Rhyno to be able to have a tournament. This is also a rematch from Smackdown, which shows how little effort they were putting into the tag division at this point.

Gable and Breeze start things and the fans are WAY into Gable. Chad twists around as only he can to escape a wristlock and it’s off to Jey, who is quickly driven into the corner. English comes in and says that he’s what a man is. That earns him a right hand to the jaw and it’s off to Mojo to work on a wristlock. Ryder comes in to quite the reaction as Mauro says the Hype Bros have more chemistry than the Periodic Table.

Everything breaks down (What took them so long?) and Ascension clears the ring, only to have American Alpha come off the top (the same corner) with double clotheslines (that’s pure Steiner Brothers). English posts Ryder though and we take a break. Back with Gotch putting Ryder in a chinlock, followed by Viktor doing the same. The other heels take turns stomping on Ryder until Breeze grabs his own chinlock. Fandango adds a slingshot legdrop as this is going WAY longer than it needs to.

JBL thinks cold beer uniting the APA is more effective than furry selfie sticks uniting Breezango but maybe he’s wrong. Ascension knocks the good guys off the apron but Viktor misses a charge in the corner, allowing Ryder to get in a neckbreaker on Konnor. The hot tag (with a limited reaction) brings in Jimmy to clean house.

Jordan gets the real hot tag and does his fired up sequence (which he really is awesome at) with a belly to belly getting two on Breeze. We hit the parade of secondary finishers as the referee is imploring them to tag. Mojo powerbombs Breeze and Viktor out of the corner and the Usos add stereo superkicks to set up stereo dives. Back in and Grand Amplitude plants Gotch, only to have Jey tag himself in for a Superfly Splash and the pin at 14:31. Gable is really not cool with that. Eh just wait until your team is split up for a pretty lame story where Jordan is Kurt Angle’s son.

Rating: B-. If you cut out a few minutes from this, it’s a heck of an opener. There are too many people in the match of course but they kept it moving fast enough (for the most part) to really get something fun out of it. Jordan’s house cleaning spot is a heck of a way to fire the crowd up and it made the match more fun than it should have been. Tweak this a bit (eight/ten man tag or shorten the match a bit) and it’s even better.

Pre-Show: Dudley Boyz vs. Sami Zayn/Neville

Sami works on D-Von’s arm to start and it’s off to Neville for more of the same. Both of them get in more shots as we hear about the rivalry over the NXT Title. I do appreciate the history, especially when Graves should know about that match very well. Bubba is sent outside but D-Von breaks up a springboard dive, allowing Bubba to nail Neville from behind to take over. The fans want tables but a back elbow to Neville’s jaw cuts them off in a hurry.

Back from a break with Bubba hitting his neckbreaker out of the corner. Things slow down even more as Bubba is talking even more than he usually does in a match. Bubba: “COME ON ENGLISH BOY! O-LAY! O-LAY!” The middle rope backsplash misses though and the hot tag brings in Sami. D-Von takes the Blue Thunder Bomb for two but the reverse 3D gets the same. Neville escapes the regular version though and we get some heel miscommunication. The Helluva Kick sets up the Red Arrow to put Bubba away at 7:55.

Rating: C-. That would be it for the Dudleys in WWE as they would have one more segment tomorrow night where Anderson and Gallows sent them packing. It’s also pretty much it for Sami and Neville as a team, which is quite odd as you would think they would be a fine choice for a team. The match was nothing you wouldn’t expect on Raw.

Pre-Show: Cesaro vs. Sheamus

You know, because two matches just weren’t enough for the pre-show. This is the first match of the Best of Seven Series, which really wasn’t too well received. After Cole says Cesaro is facing Cesaro and both Cole and Saxton say this is about establishing physical dominance, we’re ready to go. Sheamus misses a very early Brogue Kick but the spinning springboard uppercut is blocked as well.

Cesaro charges into an uppercut but comes back with a dropkick for one. The ten forearms to the chest are broken up so Sheamus clotheslines him onto the apron instead. It’s off to an armbar on Cesaro’s chronically taped up shoulder but Cesaro lifts him up into that kind of reverse Angle Slam of his. They’re certainly hitting each other hard here, which is pretty much the draw of the whole feud.

Sheamus hits a tilt-a-whirl slam and it’s off to a break. Back with Cesaro fighting out of a chinlock because that rule even applies on pre-shows that will never end. The Irish Curse gives Sheamus two as Cole runs down the pay per view card, which only makes me think that there are FAR too many titles in WWE. They fight over a suplex and fall out to the floor in a heap. Back in and Cesaro starts firing off the running uppercuts in the corner, capped off by a dropkick to knock him off the ropes.

The apron superplex (which wasn’t from the apron) gets two but Sheamus counters the Neutralizer into White Noise for two. There’s the super Regal Roll for two more and frustration is really setting in. Another Brogue Kick attempt is countered by one heck of a clothesline though and Cesaro adds a high crossbody for two of his own. Cesaro tries the Sharpshooter but Sheamus gets to the ropes. Back up and a poke to the eye sets up the Brogue Kick to give Sheamus the pin at 14:11.

Rating: B. They beat the heck out of each other and it was a fun match but it also brings up the problem: I’m not going to want to watch them fight six more times. No matter how good things are, having them happen so many times in a row over several weeks is going to get tiresome. It happens in all these series and it’s happening here too.

And now, after more wrestling than you get on an average Smackdown, here’s the actual pay per view.

The opening video looks at New York City, with the narrator telling you how AMAZING the city is. I’m not sure if New York City or Texas is worse about bragging about their home’s greatness. As usual, this switches over to a series of quick looks at the biggest matches on the card.

Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens

Well duh. That’s about as easy of a choice for an opener as you could ever find for this show. As you might expect, the crowd eats up the opening promo with a spoon and of course we hear a ton of New York City music references. Included are Frank Sinatra, Biggie Smalls and Jay-Z, plus more that probably go over my head. Cass adds in a few songs of his own as this is the only way this show could have opened. Since Graves is the best heel commentator in wrestling today though, he points out that Enzo is from New Jersey.

Jericho and Owens jump Enzo at the bell and the STUPID IDIOT chants start rolling. Enzo comes back with a crossbody and a running right hand to the jaw for two. It’s off to Cass, who drags Owens inside for a beal. That’s some scary power. Enzo gets launched into the corner to crush Jericho but the Canadians bail to the floor. That’s fine with Cass who tosses Enzo over the top onto them in a huge crash. I’ve always loved that spot as it just looks cool.

Back in and Enzo ax handles Owens but turns into a middle rope dropkick from Jericho. The Canadian violence begins with Owens kneeing Enzo from the apron and doing his dance on the apron in a rather funny visual. Owens’ comedic skills aren’t given enough credit more often than not. It’s back to Jericho for the Arrogant Cover and a chinlock with Owens telling Jericho to do it like he taught him.

Owens comes in and adds a gutbuster for two, followed by the running start for a chinlock. It takes real talent to turn a chinlock into an art form but Owens has somehow pulled it off. Enzo finally rolls away but Jericho is there to break up the diving tag attempt. Owens drops the frog splash for two and his stunned looked on the kickout is the usual awesome visual. Enzo gets pulled off the corner to make things even worse but, after blowing a kiss to Jericho, misses the Cannonball.

That means the hot tag to Cass and everything breaks down. Jericho dives into a big boot but Owens breaks up the Bada Boom Shaka Lacka. Cass gets posted on the floor and now the Cannonball against the barricade connects. Back in and Enzo scores with his top rope DDT on Jericho with Owens making the save. A pop up Codebreaker (didn’t look great as Jericho was too far away) ends Enzo at 12:09.

Rating: C+. Odd choice for an ending aside (not surprising of course but odd), this was a good way to get the crowd going. I could have gone for another hope spot from Enzo and more of Cass cleaning house but that pop up Codebreaker could have been a heck of a finisher if done right. Nice opener, though would it have killed them to put Enzo and Cass over in Brooklyn?

Smackdown bosses Daniel Bryan and Shane McMahon run into Raw General Manager Mick Foley to brag about how awesome their shows are. Former Daily Show host Jon Stewart and his son come in to ask what Foley is thinking to work with Stephanie. He rants about abuse of power but realizes she’s right behind him. Stephanie yells at him about how great it is to abuse power but thankfully New Day comes up. As the Smackdown bosses and Foley much on cereal, New Day asks Jon if he’d like to do something. He gets out as fast as he can and Stephanie isn’t amused.

We recap Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks. Sasha won the Women’s Title on the first exclusive show after the Brand Split and tonight is the rematch. The other big idea here is Charlotte never loses singles matches on pay per view and Banks has to recreate the magic one more time.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Banks is defending and we get the Big Match Intros. Some early WOOing sets up a slightly less early Bank Statement but Charlotte bails to the floor. Back in and Banks climbs the corner for a wristdrag before sending Charlotte face first into the middle buckle. Banks gets caught on top though and Charlotte basically drops her onto the ropes for a backbreaker which almost had to hurt horribly. The fact that Banks had a bad back coming in and Charlotte still did some rather sloppy moves like that got her in some hot water.

We hit a Gory Stretch on the champ for a bit but she comes back with a pair of running clotheslines. That just earns her another backbreaker and Charlotte stomps away at the back. The Figure Eight is broken up but Sasha misses a charge into the corner and gets caught in the Tree of Woe. Charlotte picks her up for a super Razor’s Edge but since that would, you know, kill Sasha, she reverses into a hurricanrana to put them both down.

Back up and a WOO earns Charlotte a string of slaps before Sasha avoids a charge in the corner and hits the double knees to the back for two. Charlotte kicks her in the leg to break up a charge but gets knocked outside again, setting up the double knees from the apron. Back in and the Backstabber doesn’t work but Natural Selection is countered into the Bank Statement (thankfully too as the Natural Selection clearly didn’t send Sasha’s head anywhere near the mat).

Charlotte makes the rope for the break and takes out the knee again. Natural Selection gives Charlotte two so she yells about being better than Sasha. Another Bank Statement goes on but Charlotte reverses into a rollup for the pin and the title at 13:52. Saxton: “Just like that?”

Rating: B. This was just a straight match and that’s the key to the whole thing. The women are getting to show that they can have a good match without the smoke and mirrors, which never would have been the case otherwise. If nothing else it got the kind of time that a title match deserves to develop the story of Banks having a bad back (which would keep her on the shelf for about a month). Strong match here and another of many to come for these two.

Doctors Anderson and Gallows (oh man I had forgotten how stupid this was) run into AJ Styles for a Club reunion. Finn Balor comes up and doesn’t think much of it. Somehow, this has still never gone anywhere.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Apollo Crews

Crews is defending after winning a triple threat match. Miz comes out wearing a glittery Phantom of the Opera mask while Maryse is basically in a one piece swimsuit. In a sign of the changing times, Mauro talks about Miz’s look instead of Maryse. Miz stomps away in the corner and gets two off a running kick to the chest. Crews gets the same off a rollup, only to walk into the short DDT as it’s almost all Miz to start. We’re already in the reverse chinlock before Miz sends him into the apron to cut off a comeback. Miz takes too long coming off the top though and dives into a dropkick to put both guys down.

A crossbody into a nipup has Miz in trouble as JBL rants about Otunga calling Crews a Jackrobat (jacked acrobat). The Toss Powerbomb is countered so Crews gets two off a tilt-a-whirl powerslam. An overhead belly to belly sets up a standing moonsault, which Otunga sums up perfectly: “A man with that kind of size and that kind of muscle should not be able to do that.” Miz teases taking a walk but Maryse cuts him off, allowing Miz to post Crews. The Skull Crushing Finale retains the title at 5:36.

Rating: D+. Standard Smackdown match and something that could have been cut, or at least put in the Kickoff Show in the place of the Dudleys match. Crews felt like an easy obstacle to overcome because there was nowhere near enough build to set the match up. Put some more effort into the title already people, as it’s just not working.

We recap John Cena vs. AJ Styles. They set up the first match when Styles and Cena were in the ring together, only to have Anderson and Gallows interfere to turn Styles heel. Styles went on a great rant about how Cena was a fraud who couldn’t hang in the ring with someone like him. Cena went into a great speech about how he’s here out of love because it never gets old. AJ beat him at Money in the Bank with assistance from Anderson and Gallows, setting up a rematch between the two here.

AJ Styles vs. John Cena

This just feels big. AJ grabs a waistlock to start but is easily knocked away. The announcers go out of the way to put over how AJ has been on big shows before but nothing this big. Oh I don’t know. I remember him being at that Wrestlemania thing earlier in the year. The dueling chants begin and the AJ STYLES side is pretty clearly stronger.

Cena’s headlock is countered and AJ scores with the dropkick but the bragging earns AJ a right to the jaw. A hard whip into the corner sends AJ down for a bit with Cena doing some rare trash talking. They head to the floor and the fans start belting out JOHN CENA SUCKS, only to have AJ turn it into some gasping with a suplex onto the apron. Cena is right back with a dropkick for two and it’s time for some more right hands to the head.

AJ comes back with a forearm to the face, earning himself Cena’s finishing sequence. It’s way too early for the AA though as AJ hits a Pele, followed by the Styles Clash for a close two. The fans were actually more into the near fall than I was expecting as you would think they’d know better this early. The AA gives Cena two of his own and both guys are down again.

Styles slips out of the super AA and grabs the torture rack for the spinout powerbomb. They’re trading bombs at this point and it’s the only way they should be going here. Something like a Big Ending gives Cena two but he can’t get the STF. Instead it’s the AA neckbreaker for two on Cena (not the same as the AA JBL) but the springboard 450 only hits mat.

A faceplant puts Cena down again though and AJ can’t follow up. He manages the springboard forearm but Cena reverses into the worst STF I’ve ever seen. Thankfully AJ slips out and grabs a Crossface, which Cena powers out of as well. That’s reversed into the Calf Crusher which AJ is smart enough to twist away from the ropes. Cena reverses that into another horrible STF (AJ’s face is on the mat) so AJ is quickly up with the enziguri. A tornado DDT plants AJ and there’s the top rope Fameasser for two.

Cena heads up again and gets taken down with a super hurricanrana (Mauro: “MAMA MIA!”), followed by the Phenomenal Forearm for a VERY near fall (drawing Mauro to his feet). It’s Cena’s turn now as he takes AJ up for the super AA and….it’s two. NOW the fans know it’s on as I don’t think anyone has ever kicked out of that before. Cena is stunned and the AA is countered into another Clash. The Phenomenal Forearm puts Cena away clean at 23:10.

Rating: A. I know it’s not going to sound good but a lot of this goes to Cena. At the end of the day, the crowd completely lost it when AJ kicked out of that super AA. AJ wins here not because he got a pin but because he beat Cena clean. That’s a very, VERY short list and that’s what makes it feel so important. Think back to how big of a deal it was when Warrior pinned Hogan clean. That felt like an era changing win, and while this isn’t quite that big, it’s the same idea.

Oh yeah and it’s an outstanding match and possibly the Match of the Year. This was the heavyweight slugfest formula as they beat the heck out of each other with both guys hitting everything they could until one of them couldn’t get up. That’s a really hard match to pull off and these two did it in an incredible match. It belonged on the grand stage and gives Cena one heck of a mountain to overcome, which he somehow did in a better match at the Royal Rumble.

Post match Cena takes off his wristband and leaves it in the ring. He would do dark matches for a few weeks and then be back wrestling on TV in less than a month so this didn’t mean anything.

Some fans won a contest and got some stuff. In other words, let the fans have a breather.

Here’s Jon Stewart for your celebrity appearance. He makes fun of himself for interfering in Cena’s match last year and says the big lesson he learned was to tuck your shirt in when you’re taking an AA. As for tonight though, he’s here to be in New Day’s corner to help deal with Anderson and Gallows. In honor of the moment, he throws on a unicorn horn and does Big E.’s (out injured due to getting crotched against the post) entrance.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows

New Day is defending of course and unfortunately Anderson and Gallows are still doing their stupid doctor nonsense, complete with jars for Kofi, Xavier and Jon’s testicles. I hear Paige can help you with one of those. Anderson headlocks Kofi down to start but he’s right back up with the jumping back elbow to the jaw. Kofi flips onto his feet and gets two off the standing double stomp. You can tell the fans are still recovering from the previous match and it’s off to Woods.

That goes badly as the he gets taken into the corner for a beating from Gallows. At least it does bring the fans back a bit with the rhythmic clapping. Gallows gets taken into the corner for the Unicorn Stampede (which they’ve kind of stopped doing in recent months) and the fans are really not responding. Woods sends him outside so Kofi can hit a running dive (while posing in the air) to take him down again. Back in and Gallows kicks Kofi in the head to take over for real this time with Anderson working on the arm.

That goes nowhere as the hot tag brings in Woods to clean house. Anderson sends him to the apron for an enziguri, setting up the rope walk elbow drop. Everything breaks down and Anderson kicks Kofi in the chest, setting up the Magic Killer. Stewart gets in though and it’s time to crotch him as well. Hang on though as he has to tuck in his shirt first. Cue the returning Big E. for the save though and that’s a DQ at 9:09.

Rating: D. I don’t know if it was the previous match or what but sweet goodness the fans did NOT care for this one. It’s not a good match in the first place as Anderson and Gallows aren’t funny in the doctor roles, but the bigger problem here was the focus being on Stewart at the end. Oh and the ending sets up a rematch, which really isn’t what they need to be going with here. Bad match but Big E.’s return did wake up the crowd.

Big E. drinks the fluid in the jar holding his “testicles”. Stewart dances with New Day and the fans…well they care when Big E. dances at least.

We recap Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler. Dolph won a six way match to earn the shot and then it all went nuts. Ziggler started talking about how he was tired of being told that he always either too good or not good enough. It was time to turn up the jets and become champion for the third time. Serious Ziggler was nice but I don’t think anyone was buying him as having a real chance here. You know, because he’s Dolph Ziggler.

Smackdown World Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Dean Ambrose

Dean is defending and Shane and Daniel are here for no apparent reason. The fans are behind Ziggler and they trade some grappling on the mat with Ziggler getting the better of it (not exactly a surprise). The threat of a neckbreaker sends Ambrose bailing to the floor so Dolph splashes him against the barricade.

Back in and Ziggler’s jumping DDT is countered with Dean throwing him outside again. Ziggler escapes a super Dirty Deeds so Dean slaps on a half crab of all things. You can tell Dean is playing the subtle heel here as the smark crowd is always going to cheer for Ziggler. Dean heads up top and gets dropkicked out of the air but he’s right back with a double chickenwing facebuster.

Ambrose tunes up the band (which is now mocking Ziggler instead of anything involving Shawn Michaels) but shakes his head and tries Dirty Deeds instead. That’s reversed into the jumping DDT and both guys are down again. A double collision gives us another lay down period until Dean is up first and hammering away.

The top rope elbow gets two so Ziggler grabs the sleeper, earning them both a tumble out to the floor. Ziggler gets in the superkick on the floor but it’s barely two back inside. The Zig Zag gets the same but Dean pops back up with the rebound lariat. Ziggler catches Dean on top and pulls him back down, right into Dirty Deeds to retain the title at 15:22.

Rating: D+. And that people, is Ziggler choking again. This would lead to him saying he’s never won the big one, which would turn into him never holding the World Title that long because holding the title is more important than winning it. The match was nothing all that good as we were just waiting on Dirty Deeds, which only happened so Dean could keep it warm for AJ next month. That was completely obvious the second AJ pinned Cena again and that’s all this title needed to do.

Package on Summerslam weekend.

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Eva Marie vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

Dang I didn’t know the Glow was a year old. Actually hang on a minute as Eva Marie is suffering from exhaustion, anxiety and stress (likely brought on by reading too many Wellness Violation messages, which meant she would never wrestle again) so we have a replacement. At least we got that amazing entrance one more time.

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

So yeah, you know full well that Nikki is going to be all that matters in this match because IT’S HER BIG COMEBACK THAT EVERYONE TOTALLY CARES ABOUT BECAUSE WE LOVE HER SO MUCH! She does get one heck of a pop though, which is rather scary. During her entrance, Mauro declares her return “miraculous”. Oh man this is going to be a long one.

Bliss rolls Becky up to start and gets in a hard slap for good measure. Naomi comes in to scare Alexa off so it’s Natalya instead. A forearm puts Natalya down and the splits legdrop gets two. Carmella comes in for the Staten Island Shuffle before a missed charge sends Natalya outside. Back in and a powerslam out of the corner plants Carmella before it’s off to Nikki, the heel, for a strong face pop.

We hit the chinlock but hang on as we need some Nikki pushups. Alexa chokeshoves Carmella down for the moonsault knees to the ribs as the crowd is dead all over again. The abdominal stretch keeps things slow until Carmella finally rolls over and makes the hot tag to Becky. All three heels are send into the corner for the springboard kicks from Lynch, followed by a Bexploder on Natalya.

Becky’s top rope legdrop gets two with Nikki making the save. A blind tag brings in Naomi for the dancing kicks with the fans just not reacting at all. Bliss’ springboard splash hits knees so it’s off to Nikki vs. Carmella. A bad looking Bronco Buster gets two on Nikki and everything breaks down. Nikki’s big forearm sets up the Rack Attack 2.0 (Nikki: “I’m back.”) for the pin at 11:16.

Rating: D. This was all about Nikki’s return and that’s not enough to carry a dull match. Naomi’s Glow stuff wasn’t over yet, Becky was stuck around people who weren’t up to her level and Carmella was showing that she didn’t need to be on the main roster yet. The same was true for Alexa and Natalya was her usual self. Just not a good match and it showed the lack of depth to the division.

We recap Rusev vs. Roman Reigns. Rusev and Lana were married and so Reigns interrupted for no apparent reason to insult them and shove them into a cake.

Maria Menunos interviews Rusev and Lana, who don’t like her questions about Reigns. They won’t stand for this and Lana is sure that her husband will destroy Reigns.

We recap the Universal Title match. Basically we need a new title due to the Brand Split and Universal Title was the best they could come up with. Seth Rollins was put into the match as Raw’s #1 draft pick and Finn Balor earned his way in by winning a series of matches. Not much else to it as there’s no major animosity between them but it’s better than pulling the title out of a suitcase.

Seth did get in a great promo talking about how he’s done everything Balor has done but he’s done it a little bit better. He’s not wrong, though that’s not the best thing to do when you have someone so new to the main roster. Then Balor showed up as the Demon and scared Rollins to death.

Universal Title: Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins

Anything goes and the title (which isn’t that well received due to a bad case of being hideous) is vacant coming in. Unless I’m forgetting something, to date this is the only time Balor has wrestled as the Demon on the main roster. We get the Big Match Intros and the title itself receives some hearty boos. Balor dropkicks him into the corner at the bell but it’s too early for the Coup de Grace.

Instead Balor hits a suicide dive to the floor, followed by some kicks to the knee back inside. They head outside again with Seth getting in his first offense via a suplex on the floor. Balor is right back with something like a Phenomenal Forearm off the barricade. Back in again and Balor hits a basement dropkick for two as this is almost one sided so far. Finn stays on the leg as the fans are singing something.

Balor jumps over the ropes but Rollins slides between his legs and powerbombs him into the barricade, completely destroying Balor’s shoulder and putting him on the shelf for the better part of eight months. We’re less than four minutes in though and you can see the shoulder looking all messed up. Back in and Seth gets two off a backbreaker, setting up a chinlock. The chants are still going and it sounds like THAT TITLE SUCKS to the tune of John Cena Sucks.

Seth starts the trash talk and cuts off a comeback attempt. A snapmare into a kick to the back has Finn in even more trouble but Seth would rather walk around than follow up. It’s back to the chinlock for a good while until the springboard knee to the head sets up Seth’s frog splash for two. What looks like a Rainmaker is countered into a DDT to give Balor his first major offense in a long time and he follows up with some forearms.

A basement dropkick sets up the Sling Blade but Seth kicks him down without much effort. An enziguri stuns Balor but he’s right back with the Pele, earning a very nice round of applause. If nothing else the chants about the title have stopped. 1916 (reverse implant DDT) gives Finn two but the Coup de Grace is countered into a triangle choke of all things. Finn falls outside because rope breaks don’t count (anything goes remember) and things slow down a bit.

Back in and the buckle bomb sets up the low superkick for two on Balor with Seth looking stunned on the kickout. A small package driver gets the same count and reaction so Seth goes up, allowing Balor to hit a very loud enziguri to put him on the floor. Balor adds a shotgun dropkick to send him into the barricade, followed by a top rope double stomp to the back of the head for two. The Coup de Grace misses and it’s a Pedigree for two. Finn counters a second Pedigree into a double stomp, followed by the Coup de Grace for the pin and the title at 19:23.

Rating: B+. When you factor in that shoulder injury, this is quite the impressive performance. Above all else though, how good is it that Balor won the title here? If he loses his first major pay per view match and then goes away until April, he’s lucky to come back to the cruiserweight division.

This was a heck of a match with both guys beating the heck out of each other. It took some time to get built up but once they finally got there, the fans really started to accept things, which is a very positive sign. Balor is someone who is going to get a very positive reaction no matter what and giving him the title here was entirely the right call.

Balor can barely move his right arm after the match but finally holds the title up. On his WWE 24 special, he said you could feel and hear the shoulder crunching and crackling as he lifted the title and it probably did more damage to the arm.

The pre-show channel chats a bit and throws us to a KFC ad with Dolph Ziggler dressing up as Colonel Sanders to beat up Miz dressed as a chicken. It’s actually dumber than you remember it being.

Here’s Lana to introduce Rusev, albeit while wearing half of a wedding dress, the bottom of which looks like a diaper. She’s one of the most beautiful women on the roster but she looks ridiculous here.

US Title: Rusev vs. Roman Reigns

Roman is challenging and the booing is strong with this one. Rusev jumps him before the bell and they fight out to the floor with Roman being sent into the steps. The fans chant RUSEV MACHKA because they’ve given up on America over their hatred for Reigns. Roman gets in a Superman Punch as the bell hasn’t rung yet. They fight over a chair with Reigns getting the better of it and destroying Rusev. Reigns finally leaves but comes back with a spear, all while the fans chant WE WANT SLATER. No match of course, likely due to time issues.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Brock Lesnar. This match was announced as Orton’s return match from surgery and the build focused on Orton being able to hit the RKO anytime, including a sweet moment where Orton interrupted a Lesnar promo with an RKO. The hype video even includes some OVW clips as they came up through developmental together and debuted within a few months of each other. This had a heck of a build and felt like something important but the question was whether Lesnar would have an actual match or just do his usual Lesnar stuff.

Randy Orton vs. Brock Lesnar

Heyman handles Lesnar’s introduction, saying he’s conquering out of the University of Suplex City. Brock seems to get into his MMA stance to start before driving Orton into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. Orton escapes the first German suplex attempt but can’t hit the RKO.

Now the first suplex connects (with Mauro knowing that it’s the 33rd Lesnar has hit at Summerslam because he’s awesome that way) and Brock follows with two more. Orton is almost out on his feet so Lesnar suplexes him again. It’s nothing but suplexes at this point and it’s already getting dull. They head outside for a much needed change of pace with Orton being thrown over the announcers’ table.

Orton gets thrown from the front row through the table as this is dominance. The other table is loaded up but whatever Lesnar is trying is countered into the RKO onto (not through) the table. The hanging DDT plants Lesnar back inside and another RKO gets two. Orton realizes he has no choice and tries the Punt, only to have it reversed into the F5 (bad one) for two more.

That’s enough for Lesnar so he takes off the gloves and pads and hammers on Orton. An elbow to the head actually busts Orton open VERY badly. Lesnar just keeps hammering on him while the fans chant GOLDBERG until the referee FINALLY stops it at 11:47. I’ve heard a bunch of answers about what happened but I believe this was the planned ending and a hard way opening.

Rating: D. Yeah this didn’t work when it happened and it didn’t work again this time around. Lesnar suplexing Orton for five minutes then selling a few big moves doesn’t make me think it’s an awesome main event. This was everything wrong with Lesnar’s current WWE run in one match and that made for a really dull match, save for the odd finish that seemed designed to protect Orton. You know, after he was basically squashed.

Lesnar keeps hammering on him until the always intimidating Shane McMahon comes out, earning himself an F5 (which thankfully didn’t lead anywhere). Heyman panics as they leave to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. If you cut an hour (or more) out of this, it’s bordering on the classic level. As it is, this is just a good show that runs WAY too long. At some point you have to cut something out and WWE just refuses to do that. Cut out the Dudleys match or the women’s tag and give us some breathing room here because sweet goodness this show could use it.

Now that being said, there’s some outstanding stuff on here with the Styles vs. Cena match as an instant classic, the Women’s Title being very good, a great Universal Title match and really only the Tag Team Title match being without much value. The show is certainly good and the positives outweigh the negatives but unless the show is a masterpiece, fans are going to start losing interest near the end. It’s a solid show but cut out a good forty minutes to really make it great.

Ratings Comparison

American Alpha/Hype Bros/Usos vs. Breezango/Ascension/Vaudevillains

Original: C

2017 Redo: B-

Dudley Boyz vs. Neville/Sami Zayn

Original: C

2017 Redo: C-

Sheamus vs. Cesaro

Original: B-

2017 Redo: B

Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass

Original: C+

2017 Redo: C+

Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Original: B

2017 Redo: B

Miz vs. Apollo Crews

Original: C

2017 Redo: D+

John Cena vs. AJ Styles

Original: A

2017 Redo: A

New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows

Original: D+

2017 Redo: D

Dolph Ziggler vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: B-

2017 Redo: D+

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

Original: C

2017 Redo: D

Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins

Original: B+

2017 Redo: D+

Brock Lesnar vs. Randy Orton

Original: C+

2017 Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: B

2017 Redo: B-

That’s quite the drop on Ambrose vs. Ziggler and Lesnar vs. Orton. Some of them are spot on though and that’s not the biggest surprise.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/08/21/summerslam-2016-they-didnt/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2016 (Original): That Bloody Lesnar

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2016
Date: August 21, 2016
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, David Otunga, John Bradshaw Layfield

Pre-Show: Ascension/Vaudevillains/Breezango vs. American Alpha/Hype Bros/Usos

Breeze gets his turn at a chinlock and Viktor keeps Zack in trouble. A neckbreaker puts Konnor down though and the hot tag brings in Jimmy to almost no reaction. Everything breaks down and Jordan starts throwing suplexes as only he cans. We get the parade of people hitting each other in the face until Rawley powerbombs Breeze and Viktor. The Usos superkick Ascension off the apron and hit double dives to take out most of the heels. Gotch takes the Grand Amplitude but Jey tags himself in for the Superfly Splash and the pin at 14:30.

Pre-Show: Dudley Boyz vs. Sami Zayn/Neville

Pre-Show: Cesaro vs. Sheamus

The Brogue Kick and Cesaro Swing are both broken up but Sheamus sends him into the post to take over. Sheamus puts on an armbar and a tilt-a-whirl powerslam takes us to a break. Back with Cesaro in a chinlock and a look at what we saw before the break, a full minute ago. The Regal Roll means we should respect the hawk but Cesaro counters a suplex to send both guys falling out to the floor.

For some reason Cesaro stands on the post and jumps down onto the top rope for the high cross body. Not much of a change but it looked cool enough. The Swing sets up the Sharpshooter but Sheamus is right next to the rope. Sheamus is tired of getting beaten on though and thumbs him in the eye to set up the Brogue Kick for the pin at 14:38.

Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens

House is quickly cleaned with the big man beating up the villains and sending them outside, only to have Enzo get launched over the top (with his foot almost getting caught on the top rope). Back in and Jericho kicks Enzo in the face to take over, allowing Owens to talk trash as only he can. We hit the ASK HIM chinlock, followed by the running the ropes chinlock from Owens.

Anderson and Gallows are making doctor jokes when AJ Styles comes in for some too sweeting. Finn Balor comes in, looks at them, and leaves as the fans lose their minds.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Apollo Crews

AJ Styles vs. John Cena

This is earlier than I was expecting. The dueling chants being and you can tell Cena is fired up. Feeling out process to start until AJ hits the dropdown dropkick but spends too much time posing, allowing a big right hand to the face. The fans come up with various ways to say John Cena sucks as AJ suplexes him on the apron to take over.

Cena actually gets cheered post match. He takes off the Never Give Up armband and leaves it in the ring before walking away. I doubt it goes anywhere but that could mean something.

Some fans won a contest.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows

New Day is defending and Big E. is out hurt. Anderson and Gallows come out in their doctor coats and even have a small jar for Stewart. Kofi starts with Anderson and flips out of a monkey flip as you would expect him to do. The Unicorn Stampede has Gallows in trouble and Kofi dives over the top, poses in the air, and takes him out again.

Big E. drinks the fluid in his his ball jar.

We recap Dolph Ziggler vs. Dean Ambrose. Dean is carrying Smackdown as the champion but Ziggler won a six pack challenge to earn a title shot here. Ziggler has been getting much more serious lately and superkicked Dean in mid sentence on Smackdown earlier this week.

Smackdown World Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler

Dean is defending and Shane and Bryan are at ringside to hold them apart before the bell. They slap each other in the face to start until Ziggler takes him down with a nice amateur move. Dean goes outside and sends Ziggler into the steps, followed by a butterfly superplex for two. Ambrose grabs a half crab as JBL goes into a rant about Dean robbing a homeless mannequin.

Back up and Dean gets two off a Glam Slam of all things before tuning up the band, which is now mocking Ziggler instead of Shawn. Instead of a superkick (what a concept), Dean tries Dirty Deeds but gets shoved to the floor. Ziggler gets two off the running DDT and hits back to back Fameassers for two. They hit crossbodies at the same time before Dean takes over with the top rope elbow.

We look at WWE taking over New York.

Naomi/Becky Lynch/Carmella vs. Natalya/Alexa Bliss/???

Naomi/Becky Lynch/Carmella vs. Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Nikki Bella

We recap Rusev vs. Roman Reigns for the US Title, which involved Lana going into a wedding cake.

We recap Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins for the inaugural Universal Title. Rollins gets the spot due to being the #1 draft pick and Balor won a mini tournament by pinning Roman Reigns to get his place. Seth seems to be laughing off Balor as a challenger so Balor brought out the Demon to make it clear how serious this was.

Raw World Title: Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins

Pre-show panel recap because screw people having to go to work tomorrow.

US Title: Roman Reigns vs. Rusev

Reigns is challenging to stand up for America. Rusev jumps him before the bell and sends Reigns into the steps a few times. The bad arm is crushed by some steps but Reigns Superman Punches him off the barricade. Referees come out to pull them apart and the guys fight over a chair. Reigns cracks him over the back with a chair and is finally made to leave. No match due to Rusev not being able to compete.

Brock Lesnar vs. Randy Orton

Now, on to the stuff before WWE lost its mind.

Results

Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens b. Enzo Amore/Big Cass – Codebreaker to Amore

Charlotte b. Sasha Banks – Rollup

Miz b. Apollo Crews – Skull Crushing Finale

AJ Styles b. John Cena – Phenomenal Forearm

Anderson and Gallows b. New Day via DQ when Big E. interfered

Dean Ambrose b. Dolph Ziggler – Dirty Deeds

Nikki Bella/Alexa Bliss/Natalya b. Carmella/Becky Lynch/Naomi – TKO to Carmella

Finn Balor b. Seth Rollins – Coup de Grace

Brock Lesnar b. Randy Orton via TKO when Orton was busted open

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2015 (2016 Redo): He Shouldn’t Laugh

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2015
Date: August 23, 2015
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 15,702
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Opening video focuses on New York City (of course) and then goes into the main events.

I forgot how annoying that “We Cool For The Summer” song can be.

Randy Orton vs. Sheamus

Some fans won a contest from Draftkings.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Lucha Dragons vs. Los Matadores vs. Prime Time Players

Jon Stewart brags to Neville and Stephen Amell (celebrity here for a match) about being friends with Undertaker. The lights go out and Undertaker (or someone who looks a lot like him) walks past. The bragging quickly ends.

Rusev vs. Dolph Ziggler

Another catfight ensues.

We recap Stephen Amell/Neville vs. Stardust/King Barrett. Neville and Stardust had been doing a comic book inspired feud between a hero and a villain. One night Stardust shoved Amell (the star of the Green Arrow TV show) and a tag match was made with Barrett joining in due to having nothing else to do.

Stephen Amell/Neville vs. Stardust/King Barrett

Amell finally gets in an enziguri and dives over for the tag to Neville. The rapid fire kicks set up the middle rope Phoenix Splash on Barrett but Stardust makes the save. The villains are sent to the floor and Stephen dives off the top onto both of them for the big spot of the match. Back in and the Red Arrow finishes Barrett at 7:34.

Look at WWE taking over Brooklyn.

Intercontinental Title: Ryback vs. The Miz vs. Big Show

The Shell Shock plants Show but Miz runs in with the Skull Crushing Finale for two on the champ. Miz covers both of them twice each but it only serves to tick Ryback out. Shell Shock is broken up with the KO and Miz makes ANOTHER save. Another KO drops Miz but Ryback clotheslines Show to the floor and steals the pin on Miz to retain at 5:34. Cole: “CLASSIC TRIPLE THREAT MATCH!” Oh shut up.

Wyatt Family vs. Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose

WWE World Title/US Title: Seth Rollins vs. John Cena

WWE Network ad.

Pre-show panel chat and they have to talk over a THANK YOU STEWART chant.

Team B.A.D. vs. Team Bella vs. Team PCB

B.A.D. – Sasha Banks, Naomi, Tamina Snuka

Bella – Nikki Bella, Brie Bella, Alicia Fox

PCB – Paige, Charlotte, Becky Lynch

This is under elimination rules, meaning the a single fall eliminates an entire team, making the match far less interesting from the start. Brie and Becky start things off as we hear about the history of Summerslam being in the New York area. Becky is sent into the ropes for a running knee to the face (with Brie shouting TEAM BELLA instead of BRIE MODE, which may or may not be worse) but Tamina tags herself in to superkick Becky in the jaw.

Cesaro vs. Kevin Owens

Brock Lesnar vs. Undertaker

Overall Rating: B. This is a really strong show with nothing bad and a bunch of good matches but the top two are ruined by the horrible booking choices. Above all else though, this show was ruined by the length. This show runs nearly three and three quarter hours with a lot of stuff that could have been cut.

Ratings Comparison

Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Prime Time Players vs. New Day vs. Los Matadores vs. Lucha Dragons

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Rusev vs. Dolph Ziggler

Original: C

Redo: C

Stephen Amell/Neville vs. King Barrett/Stardust

Original: B+

Redo: C+

The Miz vs. Big Show vs. Ryback

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose vs. Wyatt Family

Original: C+

Redo: B

John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

Original: B+

Redo: B+

Team Bella vs. Team PCB vs. Team B.A.D.

Original: C-

Redo: C

Kevin Owens vs. Cesaro

Original: B-

Redo: B

Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: B+

Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B

That original overall rating is probably a bit high as I liked almost everything more the second time around. Being able to watch this in pieces instead of in a straight sitting helps it a lot.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/08/23/summerslam-2015-a-long-long-very-long-summer/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2015 (Original): Dang It Jon

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2015
Date: August 23, 2015
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

There was no match on the pre-show.

Randy Orton vs. Sheamus

Some fans won a contest and got to do cool stuff.

Tag Team Titles: Prime Time Players vs. New Day vs. Lucha Dragons vs. Los Matadores

Jon Stewart is in the back with Stephen Amell and Neville. Stewart is a big fan but is really here for Undertaker, who passes by the three of them, silencing all three.

Rusev vs. Dolph Ziggler

Lana left Rusev for Ziggler so Rusev injured Ziggler, triggering this match. Also Rusev has Summer Rae in his corner, who is now dressing as Lana. To counter, Lana is dressing like Ziggler. Got all that? Rusev starts fast and stomps Ziggler down before choking on the ropes. He kicks Dolph in the ribs and puts on a bearhug for a good while before the swinging Rock Bottom plants him again. All Rusev so far.

The guys keep fighting post match but Summer comes in, triggering a catfight. This almost has to lead to a mixed tag.

Stardust/King Barrett vs. Neville/Stephen Amell

Barrett comes in for a kick to the ribs though and Amell is in trouble. Stardust comes back in but gets caught by an enziguri, finally allowing the hot tag to Neville. Everything breaks down with Neville cleaning house, including a middle rope Phoenix splash to Barrett, but Amell gets the dive off the top to drop Barrett and Stardust. The Red Arrow puts Barrett away at 7:37.

Video on Summerslam week.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Big Show vs. Ryback

Bray Wyatt/Luke Harper vs. Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose

We recap Rollins vs. Cena. The video has Cena narrating about how awesome New York is before Rollins starts talking about the knee, setting up the title for title match. They really started playing up Cena winning his sixteenth title near as Summerslam got closer.

WWE World Title/US Title: John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins is World Champion and Cena is US Champion with both on the line. Seth is all in white here. Cena grabs a headlock to start and the fans are entirely behind Rollins. Back up and we get a “Ce-na Sucks!” chant, followed by a Blockbuster from Seth. Three straight suicide dives make Rollins an even bigger hero but he has to get to the ropes to block the STF.

Preview of upcoming WWE Network shows, including Edge and Christian on the Stone Cold Podcast, plus Lesnar at another house show at Madison Square Garden on October 3.

The pre-show panel talks as the fans thank Stewart.

Team BAD vs. Team Bella vs. Team PCB

BAD: Naomi, Sasha Banks, Tamina

Bella: Nikki Bella, Brie Bella, Alicia Fox

PCB: Paige, Charlotte, Becky Lynch

Cesaro vs. Kevin Owens

Brock Lesnar vs. Undertaker

Brock remembers he knows submissions and puts on the Kimura but Undertaker is in the ropes, meaning he can hit the Last Ride for another two. Brock is up first for a second F5 and another near fall. Now Lesnar is getting frustrated and the third F5 is still only good for two. That gets it past the ending at Wrestlemania.

And remember: the first Wrestling Bundle ends at midnight tonight so go check it out!

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/08/23/sunday-is-the-final-day-for-wrestling-bundle-1/

Results

Sheamus b. Randy Orton – Brogue Kick

New Day b. Prime Time Players, Los Matadores and Lucha Dragons – Kingston pinned Fernando after a Clash of the Titus

Rusev vs. Dolph Ziggler went to a double countout

Stephen Amell/Neville b. Stardust/King Barrett – Red Arrow to Barrett

Ryback b. Big Show and Miz – Ryback pinned Miz after a KO Punch from Big Show

Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose b. Luke Harper/Bray Wyatt – Spear to Wyatt

Seth Rollins b. John Cena – Pedigree onto a chair

Team PCB b. Team Bella and Team PCB – Pumphandle slam to Brie Bella

Kevin Owens b. Cesaro – Pop Up Powerbomb

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2014 (2015 Redo): The New Way Of Doing Things

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2014
Date: August 17, 2014
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,079
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Pre-Show: Cesaro vs. Rob Van Dam

We take a break and come back with Cesaro holding a chinlock as the announcers give us one final hype for Cena vs. Lesnar. Rob fights up for a rolling cradle and the split legged moonsault for two, followed by a superkick to put Cesaro back on the floor. This is Van Dam 101 here, which was the biggest criticism he faced during this time. The Five Star is broken up by a big uppercut but Rob is still able to block a superplex.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler

The threat of a superkick sends Miz bailing to the floor as we hear about the Shawn Michaels vs. Rick Martel match from Summerslam 1992 where it was agreed that neither would hit the other in the face. Back in and a quick rollup gets two for Dolph but he gets whipped chest first into the corner as Miz takes over. With his variety of stomps used up, Miz kicks Dolph hard in the face before slapping on a chinlock.

Divas Title: Paige vs. AJ Lee

A top rope clothesline to the floor drops Paige again. The Shining Wizard gets two but Paige kicks her in the face, only to have the Paige Turner countered into the Black Widow. Just like at the Raw after Wrestlemania though, Paige powers out again and scores with the Rampaige for the pin and the title.

Summerslam 2015 will be in New York/New Jersey. That would be slightly changed to Brooklyn

Jack Swagger vs. Rusev

Speaking of things still going on later, these two are still having the same match the following summer. This is also a flag match, meaning a regular match with the winner getting their flag raised. Lana (rocking the white suit here) and Zeb Colter (remember him?) are the seconds. Before the match, Lana says that Hollywood is a great example of everything wrong with America. In real life, there is no happy ending and America is full of worthless cowards.

Rusev attacks Colter post match and the Russian flag comes down.

Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose

Rollins is literally carried back to the ring but Dean is waiting on them with a huge dive off the top. Back in and Dirty Deeds is countered but Ambrose blasts him with the rebound lariat. NOW the crowd is way into things and Dean curb stomps Seth, only to have Kane come in for the save. The lumberjacks get in another fight because they all have anger management issues. Dean dispatches the Wyatts but walks into a briefcase shot to the face for the pin.

Bray Wyatt vs. Chris Jericho

Bray serenades us post match.

We recap Brie Bella vs. Stephanie McMahon, which was a recap I needed when I watched this show live as the whole thing was such a mess. So Stephanie was all evil to Daniel Bryan, but Bryan is on the shelf with his neck injury so the feud was transferred over to Brie, because Brie and Bryan are totally the same thing.

Stephanie McMahon vs. Brie Bella

Randy Orton vs. Roman Reigns

WWE World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena

Ratings Comparison

Rob Van Dam vs. Cesaro

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Dolph Ziggler vs. The Miz

Original: C

Redo: C-

AJ Lee vs. Paige

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Jack Swagger vs. Rusev

Original: C+

Redo: C

Dean Ambrose vs. Seth Rollins

Original: B

Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Chris Jericho

Original: C

Redo: C-

Brie Bella vs. Stephanie McMahon

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Roman Reigns vs. Randy Orton

Original: C

Redo: B-

Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena

Original: A-

Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: C+

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/08/17/summerslam-2014-on-the-a-list/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6