It’s the final show before Unforgiven and obviously based on the date, things have changed tremendously in the whole world. Smackdown basically didn’t happen because of what happened which is perfectly fine, but it’s put them in a bind for building up the show. The good thing is that a lot of things have already been set in stone. The PPV would wind up being solid so let’s get to it.

The show opens with the American flag on the screen and a BIG USA chant. Nothing wrong with that at all.

The main events are Test/Stephanie vs. Rock II and Austin/RVD vs. Jericho/Austin.

WWF Tag Titles: Undertaker/Kane vs. Dudley Boys

Why not for both titles? Because this way if they change hands they can have ANOTHER title match that means nothing on PPVs, because that’s what they needed to fix things right? EVE MORE TITLES! Kane and D-Von start and Kane’s arm is STILL bandaged. Hasn’t that thing been hurt since April now? Kane takes him down with ease and no sells his punches. Sidewalk slam puts D-Von down and Kane drills Bubba so he can hit the top rope clothesline for two.

Off to Taker who has an American flag on his singlet now. D-Von takes him down with a shoulder block and brings in Bubba. Taker knocks down the future Bully almost immediately and hits Old School. Bubba comes back with a belly to back suplex for no cover. Kane comes in and grabs both Dudleys for chokeslams at the same time but D-Von hits him in the arm to break it up. What’s Up Kane?

Here comes a table but it doesn’t get set up. Kane is in trouble but manages to powerbomb Bubba out of the corner and tags Undertaker. A legdrop gets two on D-Von as Kane and Bubba fight on the floor. There goes the referee and cue Kronik. High Times puts Kane through the table and the 3D gives the Dudleys the titles.

Rating: D+. It was another mess but getting at least half of the titles off of Undertaker and Kane was a good thing because you had to have them get cheated to have them lose. That makes their defenses boring because you know no one is going to be able to get a clean win on them. Unfortunately this set up the Brothers vs. Kronik which was horrible.

Shane arrives and is met by Kronik and Richards. Richards offers Kronik’s services to the Alliance which is accepted. Their reward? A WCW Tag Title match on Sunday.

Storm disapproves of the swimsuit photos of Lita in WWF Magazine so he’s going to beat up Jeff tonight. Hurricane flies in and says he needs a sidekick. Storm suggests Ivory (complete with an Ivory soap ad) but Hurricane says he has a better idea and flies away.

Austin and Debra arrive and find RVD on their couch. They’re cool with each other but it doesn’t seem copacetic. RVD implies that he’s the second in command in the Alliance and if Austin is ever on vacation or something, he’d give his best to help out. Austin politely throws him out.

Lance Storm vs. Jeff Hardy

This should be good. They get technical to start and Jeff is fast enough to keep up with Storm. An O’Connor Roll is countered and they head to the floor where Jeff runs the railing for a clothesline. Back inside and Lance hiptosses him over the top and out to the floor. Storm works over the back and a backbreaker gets two. A hard Irish Whip into the corner gets the same.

Lita and Ivory are on the floor. I don’t think that pairing ever got a blowoff match or anything like that, at least not on PPV. Lance stays on the back but Jeff mule kicks out of the hold he’s in. Double legdrop between the legs and a Russian legsweep get two. Whisper in the Wind does as well, and wasn’t it nice for Storm to stand there for Jeff to hit it. Ivory’s quick distraction lets Storm hit a superkick for two. Lita goes after her and has to slap Lance as well. Jeff dives on Storm but the Swanton hits knees. Jeff tries a middle rope rana but gets caught in the Mapleleaf for the rare Jeff Hardy tap out.

Rating: C+. I liked this about as well as I thought I would. The girls were obviously going to get involved and thankfully they were only involved a little. The ending was clean and tied into the majority of the back work that Storm did earlier in the match which is all you can ask for. Fun match but I’d have liked it getting more than six minutes.

Shane asks Stephanie why she was in the handicap match last week. She says she had a plan which didn’t work that well because Booker was late. Tonight she’s in it again because….? Shane shows her what almost happened last week and Stephanie says he can’t tell her what to do. Taz comes in and wants respect so Shane gives him a match.

Perry Saturn vs. Shawn Stasiak

During Saturn’s entrance we get a recap of the Moppy Saga. Saturn runs in a circle to start so Stasiak clotheslines him down. Tilt-a-whirl slam gets two. A clothesline in the corner hits but Saturn hits something like an armdrag to take over. There’s a belly to belly and a spinning springboard dropkick for two. Stasiak comes back with a jumping back elbow for two. Saturn hits a northern lights suplex but Stacy has the referee. Shawn gets her down and kicks out of a superkick. Saturn runs the ropes and Stasiak falls on his face avoiding a leapfrog. Moss Covered Three Handled Family Credenza ends this short match.

Terri and Raven pop up on the screen with Moppy and put it through a wood chipper. You have Raven and Saturn and the feud is over a freaking mop. And people wonder why this whole Invasion story bombed.

HEY LOOK! IT’S STEPHANIE COMPLAINING ABOUT HER BROTHER! AGAIN! This time it’s to RVD. It’s now RVD vs. Jericho on Sunday for the Hardcore Title.

Hurricane offers his sidekick spot to Molly. Spike comes in to protest. You know where this is going.

Taz comes to see Shane and Booker, only to find out that his match is against the two of them.

Donate to the Red Cross. Nothing wrong with that.

Booker T/Shane McMahon vs. Taz

They double team Taz to start until Booker officially starts. Since Taz is down, Shane comes in for a Hart Attack. Jumping back elbow gets two. Back to Booker and never mind as Shane is in about 15 seconds later. Taz I think tags Booker for some reason before everyone heads to the floor. While Booker has the referee, Shane dives off the barricade with a clothesline.

Back inside Booker drops a knee and hits the Spinarooni. Shane gets in some free shots but slaps him once too often so Taz remembers that he was a killing machine in ECW and runs them both over. Tazmission is broken up by Shane and Booker “hits” the ax kick (Taz dropped about three seconds before Booker hit him. It was Taz’s fault) and the top rope elbow gets the pin.

Rating: D. Uh….ok? A guy that is a much bigger star than Taz and has a partner who is pretty talented in his own part can beat Taz (I’ll let you figure out who I mean by each of those descriptions) in a match that could have easily been cut in half. Not a godo match or anything and I’m not really sure what it proved.

Christian doesn’t care that Edge hasn’t been seen in two weeks. He wants the US Title to go with the IC Title he’s winning on Sunday.

European Title: Hurricane vs. Spike Dudley

Hurricane takes him to the mat followed by Spike taking him to the mat. They fight over a top wristlock with Hurricane throwing in a quick pose, thereby making him awesome. Hurricane takes him down and goes up, but Molly takes the cape. Now that’s just not nice. Spike goes up but gets shoved down and into the barricade. She throws the cape in and goes up (which the referee ignores) and accidentally dropkicks Spike. Eye of the Hurricane retains the belt after a short and uninteresting match.

We run down the Unforgiven card. Ok maybe just two match.

We get a few shots of some fans at WWF New York. Nice touch.

Torrie is looking GOOD in the back and runs into Shane. He thinks Torrie is manipulating Tajiri and is very proud of her for getting as far as she has.

Angle says he’ll win on Sunday when RVD pops up to point out that the fans were cheering for him. Angle says on Sunday, they’ll be chanting USA.

US Title: Christian vs. Tajiri

Christian jumps Tajiri while he’s kissing Torrie and we’re ready to go. They chop it out in the corner but Tajiri gets bored with that and kicks Christian in the head instead. He tries a rana but gets powerbombed down instead. Backbreaker gets two. Christian pounds on him a bit but gets his head kicks off and the champ takes over. The always awesome handspring elbow gets two. There’s the Tarantula but Tajiri misses a lot of kicks. Out to the floor and Christian loads up the Conchairto. Tajiri tries the Mist to defend himself but hits the referee instead and that’s a DQ.

Rating: C-. How could Christian vs. Tajiri be this boring? Oh, probably because it had four minutes and had no story behind it at all and was there so that Edge could run in at the end to set up the PPV match a little bit better? Not a horrible match or anything but when you had two guys like this out there, you should get a good match. On the other hand, I don’t remember Torrie looking this good in a VERY long time.

Edge runs in post match (duh) to break up the Conchairto and chase off Christian. The look on his face was the first time I thought Edge awesome.

During the break Rhyno Gored Tajiri, which set up their match on Sunday.

Shane makes that title match I just mentioned.

Stephanie McMahon/Test vs. The Rock

Stephanie is on the apron here and is knocked off almost immediately. Rock sends Test to the floor and the beating begins. Back inside Rock gets two but Test pounds him into the corner. Rock fires off some rights but walks into a gutwrench powerbomb for two. Test beats him down again and Stephanie comes in, only for Rock to nip up. The Canadian runs him over again and loads up the big boot but instead he walks into a Rock Bottom. Nick Patrick is with Stephanie though and that earns him a Rock Bottom of his own. Rock goes after Steph but Shane and Booker run in. Everyone hits their finishers and Steph gets the pin.

Rating: D+. I don’t particularly get how this is supposed to make me want to see Booker and Shane vs. Rock on Sunday but it got Stephanie on TV and let her pin the Rock so it must be a good idea right? Just have Rock face Shane and then have Booker and everyone else interfere and let Shane get the pin. How is that any different? Oh right: it doesn’t let Stephanie get to be on TV. Got it.

Austin won’t come out of his dressing room when RVD says their match is next. Austin says he’ll see Rob out there. Rob knocks a few more times and gets him to open the door in a bit I don’t really get.

Chris Jericho/Kurt Angle vs. Rob Van Dam/Steve Austin

They brawl on the floor to start as the fans chant USA. Wouldn’t that chant be more be for the Alliance team since they’re bother Americans? Austin and Jericho start with the champion in control. He puts Jericho on the top rope but gets caught by a dropkick for two. Off to Van Dam who misses some kicks and gets taken down by an enziguri. Here’s Angle who hits a cross body and glares at Austin.

Spinebuster gets two for Kurt. Jericho comes in and has to fight off both guys but walks into a kick from Van Dam to send him to the floor. Austin tries to piledrive him on the floor but Angle makes the save. Van Dam puts Jericho on the barricade and hits the spinning legdrop which gets two back in the ring. Austin comes in and hooks a sleeper which doesn’t last long. Jericho and Van Dam knock each other down and it’s hot tag to Angle.

Van Dam accidentally kicks Austin and gets suplexed for his troubles. Austin throws Angle into the referee and gets caught in the ankle lock but Van Dam saves. Van Dam gets put in the Walls so Austin gets the bell and clocks Jericho with it but the referee stops a similar shot to Angle. Rollup gets two for Kurt as does a suplex. Stunner is countered into the Angle Slam which is good for three.

Rating: C+. Standard good main event tag match here and THIS is how you build up Austin vs. Angle. Angle beat Austin (mostly) clean in a non-title match so there’s a reason to believe that he can do it again on Sunday, giving us a reason to want to watch the match to see if he can. That’s basic booking and no one can seem to get that anymore. This was a good match.

Overall Rating: C+. The show was good again this week but you can still see all of the major problems this show has. It’s like a nice painting covering up a huge hole in a wall: the outside looks good but it doesn’t change the fact that the hole is there. Stephanie needs to pick a story and stick with it, because her nose is in EVERYTHING right now and it’s not helping. Look at Shane: he pops up with different people but he’s not the focal point of anything but Rock’s feud, which makes him much more effect. Well that and he can actually do stuff. Stephanie is heavily involved in multiple stories and it’s not helping.

Also you still have the huge rosters and most of the people have nothing to do other than pop up every now and then. Case in point: Saturn and Raven. You have these two talented guys and the best you can do is throw them together because of a mop? Do they think people are going to care about that? That’s another issue with this: we have no reason to care about these guys and like I’ve been saying for weeks now, the Invasion happened and now….what? There never was an answer to that and it’s becoming more and more of a problem.

Here’s Unforgiven if you’re interested:

We have two shows left before Unforgiven but if you look at the date of this one, you know that the next week’s show isn’t going to be your usual one. The main event of the show, that being Austin vs. Angle, is now set due to Angle going psycho last week which is completely against his character but he did it anyway. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip of Austin and Angle from last week with Austin being tortured into a frenzy and giving Angle a rematch. On Smackdown Austin pretended that RVD was Angle and destroyed him. Austin had RVD beat but Angle popped up, causing Austin to get rolled up and pinned.

Here’s Austin to open the show. Scratch that as he’s leading the entire Alliance to the ring. Austin talks about how the people probably think he’s embarrassed, having lost to a member of the Alliance last week and that he cried last week on Raw. He isn’t ashamed of himself, but rather of everyone in the arena and the ten million people watching on TV because they’ll be cheering for Angle at Unforgiven.

Austin demands that RVD get into the ring. He wants to know who RVD thinks he is, and finger pointing results. Austin doesn’t like him and RVD doesn’t like him. The latter of those statements drew a huge pop. Austin puts down his belt and asks Rob to put his own down….and we have a hug. He likes RVD because of his confidence and thinks RVD should have enough confidence to challenge Angle to a match tonight. RVD calls Angle a great athlete and says he’d love to face him later.

Stone Cold says that he wants the Alliance to have confidence. That means that Test wants to say something. Test wants the Rock later tonight. He knows Shane and Booker are going to take the title off Rock at Unforgiven, but tonight he just wants to beat Rock up. Oh and nothing good has ever come from Texas. Austin: “He means you people, not me!” Now Kanyon has something to say too. He’s issuing an open challenge to any WWF wrestler for a US Title match, and he’s throwing that out just like Angle wanted to throw Austin off a bridge last week.

Now Taz wants to say something because this segment isn’t long enough yet. He thinks that at Unforgiven, Angle is going to beat Austin up and possibly take his title as well. That earns him a Stunner and a big beatdown from the other three Alliance members in the ring. Test kicks his head off and RVD adds a Five Star. And that’s it.

Christian vs. Billy Gunn

Christian jumps him immediately but gets reversed into the corner where Billy takes over. A hip toss gets two as does a Jackhammer. A Stinger Splash misses and Billy hits the post. Reverse DDT takes Billy down and Christian chokes him on the ropes. Oh yeah he’s a heel now. I almost forgot. Billy counters a piledriver and slingshots Christian into the corner. Christian pulls the referee in the way of the Fameasser and rolls Billy up in the corner for the pin with his feet on the ropes.

Rating: D+. Billy is one of those guys that they tried time after time to push and it never quite clicked other than when he was in the Outlaws. At the end of the day he’s the same guy that didn’t get over on his own but they kept pushing him over and over again. I know some people are fans of his but I’ve never quite gotten the appeal. Christian would continue his awesome feud with Edge soon after this.

Billy beats him up post match in a vain attempt to get people to care. Christian comes back and hits him with a chair. A One Man Conchairto ends Gunn.

Test and Stephanie are impressed by Christian. Test is going to impress her like that later tonight against Rock. Stephanie makes it a handicap match and Rock can pick Test’s partner. Just put the tights on her now.

Storm thinks the Hurricane gimmick is brilliant. Hurricane says he’s not pretending. I think he debuts whatsupwitdat here.

Hardy Boyz/Lita vs. Hurricane/Lance Storm/Ivory

Hurricane vs. Matt to get us going and there’s a loud Lita chant. The Hardys double team both men and it’s off to Storm vs. Jeff. Hurricane sneaks in and hooks a neckbreaker for two and it’s back to Lance. The Alliance team double teams Jeff and Ivory gets in a slap as well. Dropkick gets two for Storm.

Hurricane puts the cape on for a second for a clothesline then has Ivory take it back off. Matt gets in but Storm hits an enziguri while Matt is on the middle rope. Jeff knocks him to the floor and hits a dive to take out Storm. Back in the ring the girls come in and Lita beats up Ivory before snapping off a rana on Hurricane. Matt hits the Twist on Ivory and the Litasault gets the pin.

Rating: C. Not bad here but it was always good to see Lita. Ivory’s looks are underrated as well. The guys’ feuds didn’t go anywhere anytime soon as the Hardys were thrown back into a feud with the Dudleys because we hadn’t seen that recently enough. The match was nothing special though.

Cole goes to find out who Rock is going to pick for Test’s partner. Apparently Rock just got out of the shower and doesn’t have a towel on, so he catches Cole looking at the People’s Strudel. He says give him a minute.

The APA are playing cards when Jericho comes in to an ovation so loud that I can’t understand what he says. They have a six man up next. Jericho gets in a jab at Stephanie because the APA offers protection and Stephanie doesn’t use any.

Tarjiri is sitting on Regal’s desk with Torrie and Regal says that tonight, Tajiri is getting the US Title shot.

Rock has his trunks on now and Cole explains the challenge to him. First of all, two important words for Cole: EYE CONTACT. He talks about what the partner needs to have to compliment Test. They need to be fast, easy to manipulate, and have no testicles. Fast, easy and no testicles. Test’s partner will be Stephanie. Rock talks about how Test and Stephanie used to be engaged and sings a bit of the Wedding March for us.

Dudley Boys/Rhyno vs. Chris Jericho/Acolytes

Farrooq and D-Von start things off. D-Von punches a lot but walks into a clothesline for two. Off to Jericho who has his legs spread by the Dudleys. Rhyno comes in with a spinebuster for two. Off to Bubba for some elbows and a chinlock. He loads up the middle rope backsplash but Farrooq’s distraction allows Jericho to knock Bubba off the ropes. Hot tag to Bradshaw and D-Von as things pick up. Everything breaks down and Jericho single handedly knocks the Dudleys to the floor. Bradshaw’s Clothesline and the Lionsault pins Rhyno.

Rating: C. This was ok but these midcard feuds just kind of keep going and going. That was the problem that the Invasion had for it: none of the midcard stuff or the main event stuff for that matter either, ever went anywhere. Both sides won some stuff and they traded the titles back and forth, but nothing ever went anywhere until November when they just said here’s a winner take all match. That’s what held things back, among other things.

Stephanie rants about what Rock said to Test. Test doesn’t need her and wants it to be a one on one match. Stephanie insists she’s in it too because where would we be without the McMahons in the ring?

RVD comes in to see Austin and asks if it should be for the Hardcore Title when he faces Angle. Austin says he’d put it on the line so RVD says it’s a title match. Austin thinks RVD could be the next Austin in 5-10 years. RVD is happy being RVD.

Booker T vs. Undertaker

Taker shoves him into the corner and hammers away but runs into an elbow. Never mind as he kicks Booker’s head off for two. Out to the floor and Booker rams him into various things. He picks up a chair but Hebner won’t let him. That’s a good referee for once. Back in the ring Taker pounds away on Booker and hits the jumping clothesline. Booker kicks him in the face which Taker won’t sell. The side kick puts him down for a second but he blocks the ax kick and loads up the chokeslam but stops to beat up Steven Richards who runs in. Booker hits the scissors kick out of nowhere for the pin.

Rating: D. This would be one of those matches where just because Booker won, it doesn’t really mean anything. Taker almost kicked out of the kick and it took a run-in to let Booker hit a shot for a fluke win. This is one of the big problems Undertaker had back then: he wouldn’t sell for anyone and it kept his losses from meaning anything.

To further hammer in that point, Steven is about to take the Last Ride when Kronik runs in to beat Undertaker up, making Booker’s win completely forgotten. They beat Undertaker down and put him through the table. You know, because having Booker beat Taker clean and beat him down, possibly with an injury angle to make Booker look more lethal and as more of a threat against Rock, would have been stupid.

Stephanie (looking GOOD in her workout gear but with stupid looking hair) is outside on the phone with Shane who tries to talk her out of the match. This is the building where she won the Women’s Title so she can be dominant here again.

US Title: Tajiri vs. Kanyon

Kanyon takes him into the corner to start but Tajiri gets behind him and fires off the strikes. They go to the corner and the Flatliner gets two for Kanyon. They go to the floor where nothing happens and Tajiri tries a sunset flip coming back in. In a SWEET counter, Kanyon stands up and hooks a northern lights suplex out of the sunset flip attempt for two. Kanyon picks up the belt but Torrie grabs it and swings, hitting Tajiri in the head for two. Kanyon gets a rollup with his feet on the ropes for two. Green Mist and the Buzzsaw Kick give Tajiri the title.

Rating: C-. Not a horrible match I guess and Torrie looked smoking hot as always, but giving them a total of three and a half minutes didn’t do them any favors. Both of these guys were good in the ring but their characters weren’t going to get them any further than they got here, and that’s ok.

Recap of Austin vs. Angle. This is an extended version of the opening video.

Austin gives RVD a pep talk and RVD says he’ll win, which is what Angle couldn’t do, “Because I’m Rob….” Austin: “I KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!!!” That made me laugh way more than it should have.

Hardcore Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Kurt Angle

Angle gets technical to start so RVD hits him with a technical elbow to the face. Kurt is cool with that and suplexes RVD to the floor. Back in an enziguri puts Kurt down but he fights out of the corner. Van Dam tries to jump over Angle coming out of the corner but Kurt grabs the foot and puts on the ankle lock. RVD quickly grabs the rope, which is HARDCORE! They head outside and Van Dam hits a knee to the face for two, only to get caught in the ankle lock again.

This time he grabs a chair and cracks Kurt in the head with it to put him down. Back inside and they slug it out with Van Dam kicking Kurt’s head off. He puts the chair on top of Angle’s chest and puts Kurt on the apron for a slingshot legdrop which gets two on the floor. Angle counters a piledriver and drives the chair into Van Dam’s throat. Up to the stage and Rob uses the metal part of the set to pull himself up and choke Angle. As Kurt gets back up Rob tries a spin kick but Kurt grabs the ankle and gets the submission and the title.

Rating: C. Pretty decent match here and Angle looks like a better threat against Austin as a result. I’m sure they’ll wind up screwing it up because he can’t go into a world title match as the Hardcore Champion because that might make the title seem like a big deal (not sarcastic here as that wouldn’t make sense) and that shouldn’t happen.

Immediately after the fall, Austin comes out and throws BOTH guys off the stage with Van Dam getting the pin a second later to regain the title. Great.

Angle is stretchered out so JR and Heyman yell at each other A LOT. It’s about would Angle have thrown Austin off a bridge or not. JR says of course not because he didn’t do it. The table is gone due to the Undertaker attack earlier so it looks even better.

Test/Stephanie McMahon vs. The Rock

Stephanie looks GREAT in the sports bra and workout pants. JR says that Stephanie left Test standing at the altar to REALLY mess with history and Heyman calls him out on it without saying what happened. Stephanie sits in on commentary instead of getting in the ring. Test jumps him in the corner to start and is quickly sent to the floor. Stephanie gets in a few shots and Test hammers on Rock back in the ring. Sidewalk slam gets two.

Off to a bearhug as Stephanie and Heyman suck up to each other. Rock comes back with the spinning DDT and both guys are down. Rock slugs away and loads up the Rock Bottom but Test escapes. Rock hits the spinebuster instead but Stephanie trips him on the People’s Elbow attempt. Test kicks Rock’s head off and Stephanie covers him for two. Rock Bottom to Stephanie is broken up so she calls down Booker. Rock counters the pumphandle and shoves Test into Stephanie, setting up the Rock Bottom for the pin.

Rating: C-. Nothing match but DANG Stephanie’s new rack looked great out there. Seriously there’s nothing else to praise in this match other than those things. This was the same thing they’ve done with Rock for the last three weeks so it’s kind of hard to care about this match at all.

Angle has a bad neck and might be out of Unforgiven. Austin seems…..pleased?

Overall Rating: C+. This wasn’t a bad show and they built up Unforgiven some more, but the rest of the card really needs to be fleshed out. The title change in there didn’t mean anything but getting the title off Kanyon was a good idea. It wasn’t a great show, but for a show that needed to build up the PPV more, this was a good one.

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Finally we’re back on Mondays and it’s time to get ready for Breakdown. We have this and one more show before then and THANK GOODNESS the big names are back tonight. I couldn’t take another week like we had the previous two shows with all of the DQ’s and then the B level talent two days before this. The card is interesting looking tonight so let’s get to it.

Here’s Austin to open the show. Vince, Taker and Kane are already in the ring without having entrances televised. That’s something you don’t see every day. Vince says cut the music and goes into a rant about how he’s tired of seeing that title on Austin’s shoulder. On September 27 (notice that Vince keeps saying the date instead of just the name. That’s very important in building a show) there’s a triple threat match with Austin defending against both Brothers of Destruction.

Vince says he’ll never forget all of the stuff Austin has done to them. He says that he’s scratched the monsters’ back so now they’ll be watching his. If Austin goes after Vince at all, either one or both of them will be all over Austin immediately. Also at the PPV, Undertaker can’t pin Kane and Kane can’t pin Undertaker.

Vince flat out says it’s two on one because Austin won’t do things the easy way. Stone Cold screwed Stone Cold. That’s enough for Austin and he goes after Vince but the monsters jump him. They finish him with a double chokeslam. While on the ramp, Taker says it’s just business. Vince adds that it’s Austin defending against Shamrock later tonight.

Austin is mad after a break.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Road Dogg

Billy has braids in his hair in case he didn’t look stupid enough already. We actually get clips of the Roadie days. Jarrett jumps him to start but he slides between Roadie’s legs and walks into the Shake Rattle and Roll for two. A back elbow puts Jarrett down and the shaky kneedrop gets two. Road Dogg goes to the corner for ten punches, with Jeff’s face towards the crowd. That’s a new one. Jarrett comes back but crotches himself on the middle rope. Southern Justice pulls Road Dogg to the floor for a beatdown so Billy and Pac come running. The distraction lets Jeff hit the guitar shot for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not much here but it’s cool to see some people with history together out there together. I’m not sure what they were going with here by pushing Jarrett over DX but I think it was supposed to wind up with Jarrett getting a main event heel push but Austin put the brakes on that hard and you don’t argue with Austin in 1998. Southern Justice only had about two weeks left on Raw.

We get a clip from Heat last night where Shamrock called out Austin and challenged him for a title match anywhere anytime.

Road Dogg is put into an ambulance due to a guitar shot to the throat.

Kane vs. The Rock

In the back Rock is giving the Nation instructions but it turns into an argument so finally Rock says he’ll do this himself. They slug it out to start and Rock gets knocked to the floor. He grabs Kane’s leg and rams it into the apron and steps but he can’t keep Kane down. Kane powerslams him down and the fans are totally behind Rock here. Another slam sets up the top rope clothesline for two.

Rock avoids an elbow drop and hits the spinning DDT to get the fans back into it. Kane sits up but Rock punches Kane down in the corner. Neckbreaker gets two. The referee gets bumped and Rock hits the People’s Elbow. Undertaker jumps in and beats up Rocky, throwing him to the floor. Mankind comes in with a sledgehammer and blasts Kane in the back of the head with it, giving Rock the pin.

Rating: C. If he wasn’t already, the Rock was just turned face. His match at Summerslam was such a show stealer that the fans couldn’t help but cheer him. Thankfully WWF picked up on that and ran with it, unlike today where they seem incapable of listening to their audience the majority of the time. The match was pretty decent too.

Undertaker says this ends tonight with Mankind, and he can bring the sledgehammer.

Mankind says he’s been working on some scientific moves so he’d be glad to accept Undertaker’s offer to a fair fight.

Here’s Dustin Runnels to complain about how horrible this place is anymore. Someone is still coming apparently. Cue Val Venis for some innuendo. He has a new video for Dustin called The Preacher’s Wife, which is him in bed with his wife Terri. Dustin breaks down and falls to his knees. Val: “I guess getting on your knees runs in the family.”

We see the REAL MAN’S MAN Steven Regal chopping down a tree. No song unfortunately.

Intercontinental Title: HHH vs. Owen Hart

They fight over wrist control to start with Owen doing his counter to the wristlock with the flip and nipup in it. Clothesline gets two for the champion. HHH runs the ropes a bit but walks into a belly to belly to give Owen control. Small package gets two for the future Game but he gets caught by an enziguri for two. Powerslam gets the same. HHH comes back with a leg sweep and some clotheslines. Facebuster gets two. The spinning heel kick from Owen looks to set up the Sharpshooter but Henry and Chyna get in a fight. The distraction allows HHH to hit the Pedigree to retain.

Rating: C+. Did Owen ever get a fair pin over HHH? If he did I certainly can’t remember it. This furthers the idea of the Nation having problems which would result in a breakup soon after this. HHH would get hurt pretty soon and have to forfeit the title if I remember correctly. This was more about the stuff outside though.

Henry challenges Chyna and X-Pac to a handicap match which is accepted.

Mankind loads up weapons into a dumpster while singing It’s Off To Work We Go.

Mankind vs. The Undertaker

Mankind brings a dumpster full of weapons which he sets up around the ring. They both have sledgehammers so Mankind grabs the Claw to make Undertaker drop his. They immediately go to the floor and Taker is slammed into the side of the dumpster. There’s a ladder but Taker gets in a shot and works on the hands of Foley. He crushes the left hand between the steps and throws Foley through a table. They finally get back in the ring and Taker punches him down.

Back to the outside and Mankind manages a Stunner onto the top rope, losing his mask in the process. Undertaker kicks him into the side of the dumpster and puts Mankind against the steps. He swings the sledgehammer at Mankind’s head but due to wanting to avoid death, Foley moves. Kane chokeslams Mankind through the table and they go back in. Taker has the hammer so Mankind grabs a chair.

Taker kicks the chair into his face and chokeslams Foley. I’m pretty sure the match is thrown out at this point. Tombstone on a chair leaves Foley dead. He grabs the hammer but Rock pops out of the dumpster to save Foley and draw the Brothers away. How did Rock know when to pop out or what was going on outside?

Rating: C. It was a mess but these two are always worth looking at. This would continue the Rock’s turn and make Undertaker look like a complete psycho, thereby furthering his heel turn instead of being a tweener. It wasn’t really a match and it didn’t really have an ending, but it was entertaining enough.

Gangrel vs. Edge

Edge comes off the top rope and pounds on Gangrel to start. Downward Spiral is blocked and Gangrel goes up, only to get caught in a front falling electric chair drop. A German suplex is countered into a modified belly to belly by Gangrel for two. Edge comes out of the corner with a neckbreaker but a swan dive misses. Impaler is countered and they go to the floor. Edge tries a plancha but Gangrel moves, sending Edge crashing down. The Impaler on the floor knocks Edge out and the match is thrown out.

Rating: C-. Nothing much here but it’s always cool to see someone like Edge when they’re just getting started. The real explanation of these two was never given but it was clearly something about vampires or whatever. Gangrel never quite clicked in WWF but that’s probably because he was hanging out with guys like Edge and eventually Christian, which would make almost anyone look inferior.

X-Pac/Chyna vs. Mark Henry

X-Pac starts but gets shoved to the floor. D-Lo comes out to counteract HHH. Jarrett and Southern Justice come out just after Brown, giving us a total of eight people in the arena for this. HHH grabs a chair as Pac tries to suplex Henry. Chyna comes in to help and they THROW Henry over in a suplex. That looked awesome. Pac gets in some kicks before tagging in Chyna for a spear. A single forearm puts Henry down and it’s back to Pac. Another spin kick sets up the Bronco Buster but Brown grabs Chyna’s leg. Pac takes him out and Chyna goes up. She jumps into a powerslam and gets pinned. Too short to rate but it was ok.

Sable vs. Jacqueline

Evening gown match. Before the match we get a clip from 1995 with the Fink vs. Harvey Whippelman in a tuxedo match. Sable kicks her in the ribs a few times and rips a strap off the gown. Total squash with Sable pounding on her, powerbombing her and stripping her. This was nothing.

Sable strips her own gown off post match.

Shamrock says Austin will be the next victory for him.

WWF World Title: Ken Shamrock vs. Steve Austin

Austin goes right for him and the fight is on. Shamrock takes him down and they go to the mat. Ken goes for the ankle but Austin bails to the floor and gets his shirt off. He pulls Shamrock to the mat and wraps it around the post. A suplex sets up a headlock by Austin as the match slows way down. Back to their feet and Shamrock hits a heel kick and a quick suplex for two. Austin powerbombs him out of a rana and adds a middle rope elbow for two.

Back to the chinlock as Austin keeps slowing things down. It’s not a bad thing I guess but it’s uncharacteristic for Austin. He tries a Boston Crab but Shamrock spins him off. There’s a sleeper but it’s quickly broken up. They go up to the corner and Shamrock headbutts him down to the mat. He jumps off but Austin punches him out of the air. Back to the chinlock but Shamrock comes back, only to get thrown to the floor.

Austin follows him out and loads up a piledriver, only to get backdropped onto the concrete. Back inside Shamrock pounds him down in the corner and chokes Austin on the mat. There’s the Boston Crab but Austin makes a rope. Austin gets the rope and stomps Shamrock down into the corner. They collide in the middle….and here are Undertaker and Kane for the DQ.

Rating: B-. This was a very good idea for a show like this as Austin had to break a sweat here and had a real challenge but was never in any real danger of losing the title. For something like a fifteen minute match, that’s a great way to end a Raw. Why they don’t do this more often today is beyond me.

Rock and Mankind make the save as Vince is panicking. Austin chases Vince away to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was WAY better than the last two weeks as everything had energy to it and a lot of the show was about setting up matches at Breakdown. We’re alost to that show now and it’s starting to shape up well. After that it’s Judgment Day and then on to Survivor Series. Good show here and it’s great to be back on track after the horrible Saturday shows.

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We’re on Saturday again for our first of two Raws in three days. We’re continuing the push to Breakdown on the 28th. We’re in the full stretch of Austin vs. Vince now as Vince is trying to have Kane and Undertaker get the title off Austin by manipulating them somehow. Other than that we’re kind of transitioning from the Summer to the end of the year which culminates at Survivor Series. Let’s get to it.

The arena looks really different here as the aisle is shaped like an L instead of a straight line, so the video screen (not the Titantron) is on the opposite side from the camera instead of on the side if that makes sense.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Edge

Jarrett takes over quickly and rams Edge into the buckle. Edge comes back with an enziguri and here’s Southern Justice with a guitar. Jeff hits a powerslam for two. Northern lights suplex gets two for the Canadian. They’re going back and forth very quickly here. Out to the floor goes Edge but he comes back with a top rope cross body for two. Jarrett hits what would become the Stroke for no cover. DDT gets two for Jarrett as does a catapult into the buckle for Edge. Edge hits two Amigos and a sitout gordbuster for the third. And there’s the guitar shot for the DQ loss for Jarrett.

Rating: C. This was getting good until the end with the lame ending. Edge was a great addition to the roster in a few years but here he was still learning his stuff pretty slowly. Jarrett got MUCH better after getting his haircut and starting the guitar stuff. Also dropping the stupid country music stuff helped a lot.

Austin vs. Kane vs. Undertaker later tonight. Gee that’s kind of a quick addition.

Bradshaw vs. Darren Drozdov

Droz has a torn bicep coming into this. Bradshaw runs him down almost immediately and suplexes Droz for two. Droz comes back with a powerslam but gets backdropped to the floor. Back in the big boot misses and Drozdov hits a big shoulder block to take over. Apparently that triple threat I mentioned earlier is for Breakdown, not tonight. Droz counters the Clothesline and hits a DDT followed by a three point clothesline for two. Bradshaw scoops the feet in the corner and puts his own feet on the ropes for the cheap pin.

Rating: D+. Not a bad match but I never got the appeal of Droz. When you have what he had as a gimmick there’s only so far you can go but he tried. Bradshaw was just waiting for the APA to hook up so he’d have anything to do. Until then he was just a ticked off Texan of which there were about a hundred over the years. Not bad, but just a filler.

I think this show was more like a special rather than a full episode of Raw as we get a long recap of Austin/Kane/Undertaker from over the summer.

Mark Mero vs. Miguel Perez

Yeah this is acting a lot more like a special as there aren’t any promos or anything but a bunch of quick matches. Also it seems like this show is a little shorter than most usual ones. Feeling out process to start as Perez is using his speed advantage to take over. A dropkick puts Mero on the floor and Marc slows things down a bit. Top wristlock gets no one anywhere but Mero takes over with a clothesline in the corner. Perez comes back with a dropkick and standing moonsault for two. DDT gets the same but Perez walks into the TKO for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not a terrible match here but it was a glorified squash which I’m not a fan of. At the very least we didn’t have to hear Jackie talk during this. Perez was never on Raw again so at least he went out losing. Granted I don’t think I ever saw him win so this isn’t a shock. Is it clear I’m trying to fill in this space yet?

The Oddities aren’t worried about the DOA later.

Disciples of Apocalypse vs. Oddities

Golga and Kurrgan here. The ICP play them to the ring again here which was probably a bigger deal back then. Kurrgan and I think Skull start things off before it’s time for the jumping Cartman loving Earthquake. King has Golga’s Cartman next to him with the crown on it. Golga loads up the Earthquake….and the top rope breaks. It falls off the corner and Golga gets choked with it. The ICP run in for the DQ because the ring is broken.

The clowns get beaten up post match.

Here’s Rock with something to say. He wants to talk about the ladder match at Summerslam where he beat up HHH for thirty minutes but then HHH climbed the ladder and stole the Rock’s Intercontinental Title. The Rock will always be the People’s Champion though. Lately though people have had issues knowing their roles. Those people would be the Undertaker and Kane. Kane isn’t going to get away with chokeslamming the Rock and sometime soon Rock will be coming for Kane. This would be something very close to a face turn.

And now for something completely different, here’s the Lion’s Den match from Summerslam, in its entirety.

Owen Hart vs. Ken Shamrock

This match is taking place in a theater adjacent to MSG. I know that because Ross said that this match is taking place in a theater adjacent to MSG. So this is the WWF version of the UFC cage but they’re wrestling a WWF style match in there, which is about what you’d expect I guess, as it’s pretty clear Shamrock wouldn’t have much trouble in a real MMA fight with Owen.

Hart would hang on for awhile, but it’s not likely he would have much of a chance in the long run. The cage offers some different effects, but it’s nothing earth shattering. It’s better than a normal match would have been though, as it suits Shamrock very well. Speaking of that, he hits a sweet move as he gets a running start and plants his foot on the cage to jump backwards and catch Owen with I think either a back elbow or a dropkick.

Either way it looks very good and he nailed him with it. The cage isn’t really offering a lot of differences, but the main one is on whips. With no ropes, you’re just hitting cage, which has to hurt pretty badly. Hart gets the sharpshooter, which Ross says no one does better. Remind me never to leave WWF.

This is likely the coolest spot of the match as Shamrock crawls to the cage and climbs it while in the Sharpshooter, forcing the hold to be broken. The problem is they just brush over it, despite it being brilliant. Owen gets a choke on him but Shamrock runs up the cage to backflip out of it and gets the real ankle lock, not the Angle lock, to get the win.

Rating: B-. This was a weird concept and I guess it worked. It didn’t really fail, but it just wasn’t the best thing in the world. Overall the in cage stuff was fine, but it just wasn’t to my liking and I’m glad it only happened like three times. Shamrock never quite clicked in the WWF until the next year, so that can’t get here soon enough.

Too Much vs. Southern Justice

Christopher and Knight start with Lawler playing cheerleader for his son. Off to Taylor who doesn’t have the same luck. Knight kicks him in the chest which gets a hug from Christopher. From what I can tell, Too Much was going to be Billy and Chuck in the Attitude Era but it didn’t come together. It turns into a power vs. speed match as Brian tries a cross body out of the corner but gets caught in a powerslam for two. Hot tag brings in Scotty but there’s too much power for Too Much and the Slop Drop pins Scotty.

Rating: D. Whatever again here man. It’s very clear that this is just a placeholder show until we get to the real stuff again in two days. That gets really annoying though as we have to sit through a show with stuff like we’ve gotten so far. I watched Summerslam so why would I want to see that match again on Raw?

Promo of the old guys saying they love the new generation.

Dustin Runnels vs. Vader

Dustin is wearing the “He Is Coming Back” shirt. Vader drills him and pounds him down but is too fat to be Vader anymore. The beating goes on for awhile but Dustin gets in a shot to break the momentum. He makes his comeback (get it?) but sees Val in the crowd with a sign saying “I Have Come.” Ok that’s kind of funny. Vader jumps the distracted Dustin and actually wins the match with a Vader Bomb. This was very short.

Video on Sable, focusing on her match from Summerslam.

Al Snow is here and wants to talk to Vince. He gets Slaughter, Patterson and Brisco instead. It’s a comedy segment that ends with Patterson getting a shot between the legs from Head. Get this show over with already!

The Headbangers think it’s Saturday.

Headbangers vs. D’Lo Brown/Mark Henry

Brown and Mosh start things off with Mosh in control. Off to Thrasher who hits a flapjack for two. Henry comes in and it takes double teaming to take him down. A double suplex puts Henry down and it’s back to Mosh vs. D’Lo, with the latter hitting a running powerbomb for two. The Headbangers throw the Nation together and here’s Chyna for the DQ. Too short to mean anything but it was bad.

D-Generation X vs. Kai En Tai

Taka and Roadie start things off. The Outlaws double team Taka so it’s time for Funaki. Men’s Teioh comes in and the squash continues. HHH comes in and doesn’t bother to take his hat off. HHH chops him in the chest and hits the high knee before bringing Dogg back in. The heels take over and quadruple team Road Dogg with elbows and a dropkick from Taka. Top rope splash gets two for Togo. Road Dogg moves from a top rope splash from Taka and it’s off to Pac. Things speed up and everything breaks down. A gorilla press from Billy into the X-Factor pins Taka.

Rating: C-. A squash match to end this wretched show. For some reason that doesn’t surprise me. There was never any doubt that DX was going to win this and they never broke a sweat. The Nation didn’t even come out to try to avenge the earlier DQ loss. In other words, it’s a pretty worthless main event, although that finisher was cool.

HHH gets a fan to flash DX to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. For the love of all things good and holy, NEVER LET AUSTIN AND VINCE BE OFF THE SHOW AGAIN! This was one of the least interesting shows I can ever remember with no main event guys showing up and therefore making it almost a lame house show. I don’t know if everyone else was on vacation or what but this show came off like it was nothing. The ONLY thing of note here is Rock calling out Kane which could have been done on any other show. Just horrible and totally not needed, especially with regular Raw being back in two days.

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It’s a three hour show in Detroit tonight. In theory this was going to be the Draft but with the Super Show having guys from both shows on it, there’s no real need to have one. Del Rio was officially traded to Smackdown so they could probably have things like that instead of wasting a full show on a Draft. That’s probably a good idea as you can use time on other stuff. Today is also Cena’s birthday if that means anything. Let’s get to it.

Let’s burn it to the ground.

We open with the Lesnar vs. Cena contract signing, moderated by Teddy Long. Teddy screws up something about the number of titles Cena has won, because CLEARLY which title he’s won makes a difference right? Brock gets his entrance but it’s Ace instead. Brock isn’t here yet so the signing will be later. Also tonight might be Cena’s last night on Raw, so get out of his ring.

Ace goes to leave…..and here’s Edge. He says he’s off his contract in a few days after this but he’s here to talk to Cena. However this isn’t the real Cena standing in front of him. Edge came to talk to the John Cena who is his greatest rival ever in the WWE. The real Cena is the one that beat him at TLC in Toronto and threw him in the Long Island Sound. Maybe it was Rock beating him that changed Cena, because big losses can change people, like Andre losing to Hogan and the Screwjob and such.

Cena has to find what’s inside of him because this is all that both Edge and Cena have ever done. This isn’t what Lesnar is all about. He doesn’t care about these people unless they can line his pockets. Brock was gone for eight years while Cena and Edge were carrying the load. A loss to Lesnar is a slap in the face of guys like Undertaker, Michaels and Edge, so Cena needs to wake up. He isn’t asking Cena to beat Lesnar. He’s telling him to. This was pretty freaking awesome.

Chris Jericho vs. Kofi Kingston

Kofi quickly knocks him to the floor and has to do the hair bounce off the top rope thing because Jericho moved out of the way. Back in Jericho easily takes over and chops Kofi down before hooking a headlock. A charge into the corner misses and Jericho is knocked to the floor. Kofi hits a HUGE flip dive over the top which looked awesome. Chris is down as we take a break.

Back with Jericho holding a chinlock (duh) due to the springboard dropkick during the break. The bulldog puts Kofi down but the Lionsault misses. Standing rana gets two for Kofi but Chris hits a clothesline to take him down. Kofi pops back up for the top rope cross body and the SOS for two each. Trouble in Paradise is countered into a Walls attempt but Kofi escapes. He tries a springboard something but jumps into the Codebreaker. Liontamer ends this at 12:00.

Rating: B-. This was getting really good by the end. Kofi is great in this spot and I’d have few problems if he stayed here for awhile. He can be given a quick push if need be but he’s fitting in very well as a high flying jobber to the stars. There’s nothing wrong with being in this place on the card for a long stretch as a lot of people have had fine careers here.

Jericho says he’s going to win the title on Sunday and has a present for Punk when his title reign ends.

We get a clip of Lesnar debuting (in the ring) against Jeff Hardy and winning by KO at Backlash 2002.

Ace is on the phone when Eve comes in. He tells her to call him Johnny and offers her an opening in his administration. The job would be Executive Administrator which she accepts. He wants a hug but gets a handshake instead.

We get some of the sitdown interview from last week with Lesnar.

Punk is in the back and his gift is a big basket of liquor. Punk keeps one bottle which he says he’ll give to Jericho at the PPV and gives the rest of the basket to Josh. This could be interesting.

Lord Tensai vs. R-Truth

This is kind of a drop in opponent quality for Tensai. Tensai’s inset promo is mostly in Japanese. Tensai no sells a lot of Truth’s offense and runs him over. He fires off the headbutts in the corner and Truth is in trouble. Backsplash hits and the Baldo Bomb sets up the Mist Claw for the win at 2:00.

Here’s Kane to talk about the match on Sunday with Orton. Orton can’t beat Kane with rules as was proven at Wrestlemania so why would he think that he can beat Kane without them? Orton is struggling with humanity and hates that Kane has discovered his one true weakness. Kane has found Orton’s shoulders? He calls Randy a scared boy looking for his father. Orton pops up on the screen and says he wants to get into this too. Behind him is Paul Bearer tied up in a chair. Orton throws him inside what looks like a freezer. Kane says he doesn’t care because his father is the devil himself.

Kane goes to leave but Orton comes up the aisle for a slugout. Kane gets rammed into the steps and then the post with a good looking shot. Orton finds a pipe from somewhere and beats Kane up with it, sending Kane up through the crowd.

Jericho is in the back and runs into Alex Riley, who says he thinks Punk is drinking from the bottle of alcohol he was given. They go to his locker room and see him on the phone having a drink from a red cup with the bottle next to it, but you can’t tell what’s in the cup. Jericho looks happily stunned.

Alberto Del Rio/Cody Rhodes vs. Big Show/Great Khali

Cody vs. Show II is announced for the PPV and the stipulation is to be determined. They don’t know it by now? That can’t be a good sign. Khali is limping from the attack on Friday. He and Cody start and Cody’s kick is easily countered. Khali goes after the knee of Cody but when he loads up the chop Cody bails to the floor. Back inside Rhodes immediately tags out and Alberto fires a kick to the knee. That gets him nowhere other than into the corner for some chops.

We take a break and come back with the hot tag to Big show so he can beat on Del Rio. Cody pulls the rope down and sends Show to the floor for some work on the knee. The heels work over the knee with Cody hooking the Figure Four. It’s not as bad as the one from Friday but it’s still pretty bad. Show comes back and Del Rio walks out, allowing the chokeslam to pin Cody at 10:20.

Rating: D+. Oh good freaking grief this company makes my head HURT. There’s a title match on Sunday (one of five total on the show I believe) and they decide to have the champion, who has dominated the challenger for a month now, dominate him again. I mean, heaven forbid that Khali gets pinned or that Big Show takes a fluke fall to make us think that Cody has a chance right?

Santino defends the US Title against Miz on the pre-show on Sunday, because THE UNITED STATES TITLE ISN’T IMPORTANT ENOUGH TO PUT ON A FREAKING PAY PER VIEW!

Jericho is with Ace, Eve and Teddy, saying that Punk needs to be stripped of the title. Eve says that there’s a WWE rule saying that you can’t drink alcohol within 12 hours of a WWE show. There’s going to be a field sobriety test later. Jericho leaves and Teddy gets yelled at for not following the rules. He gets to administer the test later and possibly strip Punk of the title.

Lesnar is here and shoves Josh against a wall. Brock walks away and Josh says he’s just trying to do his job, which earns him a trip through the interview set.

Back from a break and Josh is being put on a stretcher.

Divas Title: Nikki Bella vs. Beth Phoenix

Before the match here’s Eve to say that this is now a lumberjack match. Maxine is one of the divas here so I’m sure she’ll be complaining about not being off NXT yet this week again. Nikki dropkicks Beth down and monkey flips her down. That results in her getting slammed into the corner and gorilla press dropped. Off to a chinlock followed by a backbreaker. Beth throws her to the floor and injures her knee. Brie goes after Beth and the lumberjacks jump on Beth in a dog pile. I think there was a switch in the pile but I’m not sure. Beth’s ankle or leg is messed up, allowing Nikki to roll her up and win the title at 4:11.

Rating: D. The girls looked good, the match was the usual Diva stuff, the whole deal with the Bellas leaving soon is now up in the air, I still don’t care about the Divas. Next. Oh and the leg injury appears to be real.

Punk freaks out and breaks stuff because he has to have a sobriety test.

Here’s Teddy with two cops for the sobriety test. Jericho comes out to observe this. Punk comes out and is acting shaky because he’s drunk you see. He drops the belt as he’s standing in the ring. It’s not Hawk in 98 bad but I don’t see a clear ending to this. Punk talks about how ridiculous this is, and the whole WWF (yes WWF) Universe says this is ridiculous. First up is he has to recite the alphabet backwards. He can’t do it and says it’s stupid because no one can do that sober or drunk.

Next up is walking a red line that’s in the ring. “I’ve seen Cops before. This is easy.” He does a Karate Kid impression but can’t do this either. The second officer says that Punk is obviously intoxicated and the cops are sent away. Teddy asks for the title and Punk doesn’t want to do it of course. He hands Teddy the title but before it goes to Jericho Punk wants one more chance. He tries to do the alphabet backwards again and does it very slowly (messing up the S and the T) but does it at the same time as walking a straight line, before moonwalking and strutting through the end. Punk gets it right and destroys Jericho.

Clip of Lesnar destroying Hogan on Smackdown. I really don’t get why this is supposed to be a big deal.

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

Daniel Bryan gets to be guest referee. They trade power to start but Bryan stops him from throwing a punch. Remember that Sheamus is on the referee probation. Henry runs Sheamus over and covers with Bryan counting the pin in less than a second, ending it at 1:36.

Post match Sheamus goes after Bryan but has to kick Henry’s head off first. He takes Sheamus’ knee out and kicks him in the head before putting on the YES Lock.

Brodus/Horny vs. Ziggler/Swagger later on has its own sponsor: Taco Bell.

Back from a break Sheamu

s thinks Bryan is a coward and a snake in the grass. He’s going to get the same treatment that the snakes in Ireland got, but Sheamus is no saint. I like Sheamus A LOT more (which is saying a lot as he might be my favorite wrestler right now) when he has some adversity instead of just plowing over everyone.

Primo/Epico vs. Zach Ryder/Santino Marella

Ryder and Epico start things off with Zach taking over with an armbar. He sends Epico into the corner and hits the boot but Rosa distracts him from hitting the Rough Ryder. Out to the floor and Ryder gets sent into the post which gets one in the ring. The champs hammer away on him but Primo misses a springboard flip dive, allowing the hot tag to Santino. He loads up the Cobra as Ryder takes out Epico. Primo dropkicks Santino down but Santino backflips to his feet and the Cobra gets the pin at 3:18. It was stupid but I found it funny so that’s all that matters.

Rating: C-. I have no idea what to think of this. On one hand I’m glad Ryder isn’t getting destroyed by another main event guy, but at the same time the tag titles are about as valuable as the CWF Bahamanian Title right now. Then again, the titles have been dead for a long time now so I think it’s excusable.

Kane sneaks into the freezer and gets Paul out. Paul thanks him for saving him, but Kane shoves him back in again. Ok then.

Epico and Primo are arguing when Abraham Washington comes in and wants to know why they’re being treated like jokes who can’t get on Wrestlemania or can’t get an entrance. He gives them his card and they seem interested.

Brodus Clay/Hornswoggle vs. Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger

This is presented by Taco Bell. Whatever pays the bills. Horny starts with Swagger before it’s off to Dolph. He stands on Horny’s head but Horny comes back with a headscissors. Off to Brodus vs. Swagger and the fat dancing dinosaur from another planet runs over the All American Hitler Youth. Vickie comes in for the DQ at 1:55.

Horny, the dancers and Brodus surround her but she goes to get Brodus’ hat and puts it on Clay’s head. Horny bites her and that’s it.

Lesnar headlined Mania 19. His concussion isn’t mentioned or shown.

Here’s the rest of the interview with Brock last week.

Ace comes out to run the contract signing. Brock comes out to a decent pop. And there’s no Cena. Lesnar calls him out but there’s still no Cena. Brock gets in Ace’s face a bit but says that he needs to talk about why Brock was late earlier today. He asks Ace to sit down and talk about some changes that Lesnar wants and needs. Since he’s been back, he’s not happy with how things are going.

Brock has some demands/requests that Ace is going to have to sign off on them. He has a copy of those changes that have to go through before Sunday, preferably right now or he’s not signing to face Cena. Brock says he’s not a naive farm boy like he was eight years ago. Instead he knows this company needs him. If he’s going to be the face of the company, he wants all of Ace’s ideas run by him first. He wants Vince’s private jet to and from the venues for Raw.

Beating people up makes him happy, so when he got he got here and had to deal with what he hates, that being stupid people, he beat someone up. He’ll show up on Raw when and how he wants. Ace can’t fine Brock like he did Sheamus and Brock wants more money also. Until those demands are met, there’s no match on Sunday. Oh and the show needs to be called Monday Night Raw Starring Brock Lesnar. Ace shakes his hand and says he agrees to those terms. Brock signs and here comes Cena.

Cena has the chain and the lock around his neck. I think this is Serious Cena. He has the chain in his hand now and looks at the contract but doesn’t sign it yet. Cena looks at it again but still won’t sign. Lesnar taunts him and Cena takes the contract out of the folder. Brock says he likes the feeling he’s getting from Cena because it feels like it’s real.

He says Cena is scared and that he’s the reason Cena lost last week. He keeps saying Cena is scared which makes Cena sign. Cena has the right hand with the chain cocked back and Brock has his hand cocked as well. There goes the table but Brock smiles and shakes his finger no. Cena never said a word. Brock leaves to a ton of booing for the first time since he’s been back. And we’re done with a 15 minute overrun.

Overall Rating: B. I liked this show as it felt like a go home show. Instead of your usual stuff, we got a lot of solid build to the major matches. Why was it solid? BECAUSE IT WASN’T ALL THE SAME! They mixed stuff up, like with the two world title matches. It’s so refreshing to see something different like that instead of the same stuff time after time.

Results
Chris Jericho b. Kofi Kingston – Walls of Jericho
Lord Tensai b. R-Truth – Claw Hold
Big Show/Great Khali b. Cody Rhodes/Alberto Del Rio – Chokeslam to Rhodes
Nikki Bella b. Beth Phoenix – Rollup
Mark Henry b. Sheamus – Clothesline
Zach Ryder/Santino Marella b. Epico/Primo – Cobra to Primo
Brodus Clay/Hornswoggle b. Jack Swagger/Dolph Ziggler via DQ when Vickie Guerrero interfered

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