Monday Night Raw
Date: December 19, 2011
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re into that limbo period between TLC and the Rumble. There are six Raws before the PPV and based on that, there are usually multiple shows where not much happens. I’d expect the next two to be that way, especially with Christmas coming up. These are usually throwaway shows and that’s ok, especially given how much they had happen last night. Let’s get to it.

Let’s Burn it to the Ground.

We open with the lights off and almost everything dark. Punk starts talking and says that we’re live in the entertainment capital of….this state, and here are the results of TLC. Since Johnny Ace is the least creative middle man in the history of management, here’s the result of TLC. First of all, who won the TLC main event? The three options are shown and Punk says it was him, the best wrestler in the world.

Here’s Punk who looks very happy. He talks about being banged up and sore but he’s the champion. This is a title that a lot of people never thought he would win. That brings him to the next match from last night: the US Title match. He does the who won thing again and brings out Ryder, who is WAY over in Philadelphia. Think about that. He’s insanely over in Philadelphia, just like he was in MSG.

Now let’s talk about the big one. There was a chairs match, but the man that walked out with the title wasn’t one of the people originally in it. The World Heavyweight Champion, is Daniel Bryan. They all stand in the ring with their new titles and it’s quite a visual. Punk talks about how if any city would appreciate this, it’s Philadelphia. The fans chant ECW and Punk mentions how awesome it is that two guys like Bryan and Punk who met ten years ago down the street would be here in this ring as world champions.

Punk says this isn’t about him but rather about those two. They’ve broken their backs for wrestling and the people have brought them to this level. Let’s hear from the new champions. Ryder says he called his dad this morning and asked if he really was champion. His dad’s response: “WOO WOO WOO! You know it!” Bryan says there are people like Cole that says he didn’t belong here, but now he’s the World Heavyweight Champion.

Bryan gets cut off because Miz, Ziggler and Del Rio all come out and head to the ring. The champions hold them off until Ryder hits a flip dive onto Ziggler. He goes into the barricade so the world champs go after Miz and Del Rio. Ace cuts them off and the champs go check on Ryder who is holding his shoulder. Ace makes a six man tag for the main event. No stipulations are announced.

Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton

Orton won a tables match last night. They slug it out to start and head to the floor pretty quickly. Barrett takes over and rams Orton into the post and drapes him over the barricade as we take a break. Back with Barrett kicking Orton in the face to send him outside. Orton is looking less orange tonight. He starts his comeback and hits the powerslam. Elevated DDT is countered as is the Wasteland. Backbreaker sets up the DDT but Barrett pokes him in the eye afterwards….for a DQ at 8:00? Seriously? A THUMB TO THE EYE GETS A DQ NOW???

Rating: D+. They were kind of going through the motions until the ending here which is ok because I like Barrett’s in ring style, but the rest of the match was pretty boring. The ending was rather stupid but it continues the feud and lets us have another match here, which Barrett could win and move on to a match with Bryan at the Rumble.

Post match Barrett beats Orton up with the Bossman Slam (now called Winds of Change) and a Wasteland through a table.

We recap HHH vs. Nash last night. Nash is going to be out for six weeks, which will put him right in line for the Rumble right?

Beth Phoenix vs. Alicia Fox

Non-title here I think. Alicia is trending worldwide, reverse DDT, flipping legdrop, Alicia pins her 100% clean in 48 seconds.

Alicia wishes everyone a foxy holiday.

Sheamus vs. Jinder Mahal

Why is this match still happening? Mahal hasn’t had a chance against him yet and we’re seeing this again? He takes over to start and hits some strikes to the head, be they either a knee or a dropkick. Sheamus wakes up and hits the Irish Curse and Celtic Cross for the pin at 1:57. Did anyone expect anything else?

Here’s Cena to address what happened last week. Naturally he’s loathed here in Philly. He says that what he’s about to say is shocking. If you have a medical condition, you need to cover your ears. He thinks there are some people that don’t like him. Some of them aren’t here (like Rock, who he’ll be ready for in April) but one of them is a monster on the loose who has issues with Christmas and the dentist.

Cena hopes that he was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. If that’s the case, things move on and he won’t be going after Kane. If that’s not the case, they have some business and let’s settle it right now. Instead cue Henry who is badly limping. He says that if it wasn’t for Kane, Cena would be the new member of the Hall of Pain. The fans chant Sexual Chocolate. He says he’s not in the mood for jokes after losing the title last night. Henry is here to address why he lost and he’d recommend that Cena leaves now.

Now cue Kane’s pyro but the lights go out. There’s organ music and here he comes, complete with the welder’s mask. Henry has bailed and Kane circles the ring to look at him. Then he turns to look at Cena. Kane takes the mask off and has the red one on as he gets in the ring. Cena immediately hammers him down and clotheslines him over the ropes.

Kane lands on his feet and pulls Cena to the floor. He puts Cena on the table and puts his hand over Cena’s face and smothers him. I think Cena bit his lip because it looks like he’s bleeding from the mouth. Kane rips the shirt off Cena (it was cut at the top earlier) and leaves with it. Cena looks terrified.

Primo/Epico vs. Usos

We get the Siva Tao and Rosa dancing. My night is complete. Primo starts with let’s say Jey. The heels take over and I’d really rather just look at Rosa in those tiny shorts. Air Boom is watching in the back as Epico beats up Jey. Hot tag to Jimmy who hits a Bubba Bomb and the running Umaga (NOT RIKISHI) shot in the corner. And then the Backstabber ends him at 2:56. Too short to rate but it was pretty much the same thing from Smackdown.

Cody says the Rumble ad wasn’t as ridiculous as Booker thinking he could win the title. Santino pops up with a gift for him but Cody doesn’t want it. The Cobra pops out of it, as in the one on Santino’s arm.

Santino Marella vs. Cody Rhodes

Non-title again. Santino does some martial arts stuff and gets punched in the face. Santino gets in a few shots but shouting COBRA seems to be a bad idea as he walks into an Alabama Slam for the pin at 1:28.

Here’s Nickelback’s performance from Tribute to the Troops.

The Bellas hit on Ace and get in an argument over who is a floozy. They rant about Teddy and Ace says the board is watching him. He wishes them a Merry Christmas and they kiss him on the cheek then leave. Vickie barges in and demands a rematch for Ziggler. Horny pops in with mistletoe and kisses her, prompting lots of screaming.

We get an interview off WWE.com with Ryder and his dad after the show. That win really was a cool moment.

Big Show says he had it last night and it lasted 45 seconds. It took him 9 years to get there and he’s speechless. It’s his fault though because he encouraged Bryan to cash in a few weeks ago. Show looks like he wants to kill someone but is smiling most of the time. Josh eggs him on and says that Show is going to probably have the record for shortest world title reign in history and he’ll probably hold that forever. Show looks down at him and for some reason I’m cracking up at it. He shakes his head, says he’s ok, and walks away.

The Miz/Alberto Del Rio/Dolph Ziggler vs. Zack Ryder/Daniel Bryan/CM Punk

During Alberto’s entrance, the Second Coming video happens again. The word this time is prophetless. Is that even a word? Ryder comes in through the crowd. You can tell the Philly fans like him as they don’t mug him. Bryan does the same, as does Punk. How much nicer it is just to change ANYTHING a little bit. It can really make a huge difference. Punk vs. Miz gets us going. Bryan got by far the weakest reaction of all three faces if you’re curious.

Ziggler comes in and takes the surfboard knee stomp. Off to Ziggler who gets a Woo chant. Del Rio misses a charge and all three heels are outside. Bryan teases a suicide dive so that Ryder can hit his flip dive. Bryan takes out Ziggler with a knee from the apron and Punk dives off the top. The champs rule the ring (Punk takes a bow) as we take a break. Back with Bryan kicking Miz but getting caught in a DDT for two.

The heels beat on Bryan for awhile as we hit the main event formula for a tag match. Del Rio works on the arm and hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. Bryan gets his knees up and it’s hot tag to Ryder. The Broski Boot puts Ziggler down for two but he gets caught in a Miz chinlock. He backdrops Del Rio to the floor and it’s double tag to Miz and Punk. Macho Elbow of course gets an eruption in an old WWF town like Philly. Anaconda Vice goes on but Dolph makes the save. Another double tag brings in Del Rio and Miz and it breaks down quickly. GTS to Miz and Cole is losing it. The LeBell Lock ends Del Rio at 13:12.

Rating: C. This was a main event tag and this was fine. The whole point of this was to have some fun and let the new champions get their win on their first night with their titles. That’s perfectly fine and this wasn’t supposed to be anything big and epic. There’s nothing wrong with that and the match worked fine for what it was.

Big celebration ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling wasn’t the point here. This was one of those throwaway shows I was talking about in the intro. It wasn’t bad or anything, but this was just a placeholder until we get to the new year and start the Rumble build. They did this for the last few years and that’s fine. The triple champion focus was a nice touch and it’s very refreshing to see them just mix things up a little bit. Fun show, although not very good from a quality standpoint.

Results
Randy Orton b. Wade Barrett via DQ when Barrett poked Orton in the eye
Alicia Fox b. Beth Phoenix – Flipping legdrop
Sheamus b. Jinder Mahal – Celtic Cross
Epico/Primo b. Usos – Backstabber to Jey
Cody Rhodes b. Santino Marella – Alabama Slam
CM Punk/Daniel Bryan/Zack Ryder b. The Miz/Dolph Ziggler/Alberto Del Rio – LeBell Lock to Del Rio

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Monday Night Raw
Date: October 15, 2001
Location: Corel Center, Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

This was a special request from someone so here it is. To set the stage a bit, this is during the latter part of the Invasion/Alliance angle and Austin is the top dog in the whole thing because when you think Austin, you think of his time in WCW and ECW right? The Alliance was doomed from the start, if nothing else due to their name. It sounds like something you have as an indy company instead of the company that’s going to fight Vince. I wonder if it was a backhanded jab at the NWA. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video of Shane talking to Austin about the triple threat main event on Sunday (No Mercy) and Austin is told that there are two Alliance guys in it so they have a 2/3 chance. Austin isn’t happy with the idea of RVD winning the title. RVD was as popular as beer in a frat house at this point, so they went with Angle instead. You know, because that was the smart idea right?

The main event is Austin/??? vs. Angle/???.

Here’s Foley who has a new book and is commissioner again. Mick asks why he’d come back to a place where he keeps getting yelled at and fired. His response: he doesn’t care. He didn’t come back for Vince, he didn’t come back to plug a new book (“Like this one: Mick Foley’s Halloween Hijinx, which just happens to be available at bookstores now.”), but rather for the fans. He made the triple threat for the fans and we have a cheap pop.

Cue Trish who is returning apparently. She talks about how Foley needs some Stratusfaction and hypes a lingerie match at No Mercy. Trish: “You know who looks great in lingerie Mick?” Foley: “Pat Patterson?” She takes her robe off and is in a one piece. I’m not one to complain, but is there a point to this? Foley offers to put her in a cage at his house where his kids can poke her with sticks. And that’s it. That’s the whole segment. Trish isn’t even in the match Sunday. Why did this happen?

In the back Austin is having a meeting with the Alliance. He says he’s cool with RVD reaching for the star because that’s what he said to do. As for the mystery partner tonight, he’s going to put it up to a vote. Austin has Debra hand out paper and pencils. Well at least he’s organized. He hints that he doesn’t want it to be RVD. Booker basically says he knows he’ll (as in Booker) will win.

The APA are with Jackie and Nidia in the back. Nidia recently won Tough Enough and they want her to come with them to the ring tonight as a reward. They get to their office and Hurricane/Mighty Molly have attached their Hurricycle to the door. They drive away and destroy it, ticking off the APA.

Big Show vs. Dudley Boys

I know this is saying a lot, but Stacy was never hotter than when she was with the Dudleys. The Dudleys beat up Spike and Show is here for revenge for some reason. The double teaming doesn’t work so the Dudleys run, but Big Show chases them down (which sums up the Dudleys’ conditioning) and we go back to the ring. They beat him down and hit What’s Up but can’t suplex him. Show destroys them and chokeslams D-Von but he wants a table. He sets up a powerbomb but Stacy gets on the apron and starts shaking it so Bubba can hit Show with a title for the weak pin.

Rating: D-. The only reason this doesn’t fail is Stacy is go freaking stunning in this era. The match was junk and I have no idea what the point was to have this match. There’s some post match stuff and it’s kind of a reason, but was this really the best they could come up with? Bad match, hot woman.

Tajiri runs out for the save and Bubba goes through the table.

Austin gets the final vote and is ready to come count them, but he throws one away (presumably a vote for RVD) and leaves.

Quick video showing Regal, now in the Alliance, being fired as Commissioner of the WWF.

Here’s the Alliance for the vote reveal. Stephanie and her awesome implants makes fun of her mom and hands the mic to Shane, who announces Regal as the Alliance Commissioner. Regal says he’s proud to be here and that’s it. Oh never mind. He says this is the rising force in sports entertainment and praises Austin.

Austin says it’s time for the vote and everyone chants RVD. RVD gets there late for no apparent reason. Austin reads through the votes (which have names on them) and Booker seems to be running away with it. RVD only gets one vote so Austin just ends this and says it’s Booker as his partner. Booker says he’ll prove his worth.

RVD isn’t happy so Austin yells at him, saying he only got one vote. Taz isn’t happy for some reason but he’s only kind of glaring and doesn’t say anything. Austin asks RVD if he thinks he deserves to be in the ring with Austin. RVD deserves to be a champion, so he gets a WCW Title shot against Rock later tonight. The idea is he’d be out of the triple threat if he wins. Regal officially makes the match.

Hurricane/Lance Storm/Mighty Molly vs. APA/Jacqueline

Hurricane is getting more and more popular at this point. The APA charges in to start and the beating begins. Faarooq and Storm start but Molly tags herself in. She hits Faarooq in the back and it’s off to Jackie. Jackie beats her up a bit and hits a bulldog for two. Hurricane comes in but so does Bradshaw who cleans house. Hurricane puts on the cape but jumps into a fallaway slam. The Clothesline ends it. This was a squash.

The booking for that makes no sense either as Hurricane and Storm had a WCW Tag Title shot on Sunday while the APA was in a dark match. There’s a good example of stupid and not thinking in booking. It’s booking for the TV show, not the PPV.

Kidman thinks something is up with the votes, because everyone listed voted for RVD. Tazz comes in and says shut up or he’ll tell Austin. Tazz vs. Kidman later.

Angle isn’t sure who his partner is going to be. Taker walks up and says he’s going to be the partner. Angle is cool with that.

Jericho says he wants to fight Rock at No Mercy. He and Rock are feuding so he makes fun of Rock’s signature stuff a bit. Cue Rock, who towers over Jericho. Rock says stay out of the match with RVD.

WCW World Title: The Rock vs. Rob Van Dam

Jericho is on commentary. Rock hits the release belly to belly to start and we head to the floor. Rock avoids the spinning leg drop from the apron and both guys get rammed into the table. Van Dam gets a spin kick and a leg drop for two. Jericho isn’t all that impressed with Rocky. Van Dam works on the ribs which Jericho calls smart. You know, because his finisher hits the ribs. That’s a little thing called analysis, but we don’t have time for that. WE HAVE TWITTER LINES TO RECITE!!!

Split legged moonsault misses and both guys are down. Rock gets up first and hits a DDT for two. I like RVD standing on his head for all intents and purposes when he gets dropped on his head. Rock Bottom is blocked but Rock hits a spinebuster to put both guys down. Van Dam sweeps the leg but Rolling Thunder is countered. They go to the floor and Rock hits him against the announce table. Rob goes for a chair and uses the distraction to let Rhyno run in for a Gore. Rock is dead so RVD goes up for the Splash and Jericho shoves him off for the DQ.

Rating: C+. Pretty basic match until the ending. This could have been a good match but with just eight minutes there’s only so much they can do. You can argue whether or not the ending makes sense but it’s close enough I guess. Still though, this was fine considering it was thrown onto the show (because we can’t market it right?) and RVD doesn’t get the title yet.

Jericho doesn’t save Rock from the beatdown because that’s what Rock wanted right?

Stephanie yells at Rhyno about how Jericho just messed everything up. Stephanie, just look hot. Don’t talk. You can’t do it.

Tazz vs. Billy Kidman

Tazz throws him around and they seem to mess something up where Kidman’s face hits the back of Tazz’s head in the corner. They slug it out and Kidman hits a spinning X Factor to end this. It wasn’t even two minutes long and I wouldn’t be surprised if someone was a bit messed up out there.

Rhyno vs. Chris Jericho

Rhyno is US Champion but this is non-title. Rhyno clotheslines him down and pounds Jericho in the corner to start things off. Jericho fights back and hits what we would call the Skull Crushing Finale for two. Spinebuster puts Jericho down for two. That’s a very popular move tonight. Off to a chinlock. I’m sorry about all the play by play but with practically zero backstory here there isn’t much to talk about.

We go WAY old school with Rhyno busting out an airplane spin for two. Rhyno continues to surprise me, missing a middle rope splash. Jericho speeds things up but misses the Lionsault. Belly to belly gets two for the horned one. Jericho hooks the Walls off a rollup but here’s the Alliance for the DQ.

Rating: D. This was nothing worth seeing. The whole point was for the run-in and the post match stuff, which is nothing all that interesting. The interesting thing to see though is that Raven and Mike Awesome ran in for the DQ. If those two, especially Awesome, had been used properly, my goodness what they could have done.

Rock comes out for the save and lays Jericho out with a Rock Bottom, which isn’t really that popular in Canada.

Diamond Dallas Page is at WWF New York and doesn’t like Canada. He’s really positive. It’s pretty clear he’s fishing for ANYTHING he can talk about here.

Edge vs. X-Pac

DIG THAT ROB ZOMBIE INTRO!!! This was right around the time where Edge would hit a groove and was without a doubt the hottest thing on the planet. If he hadn’t gotten hurt, John Cena might have been out of a job. Pac is Light Heavyweight Champions, meaning that every match tonight other than the six man has had a champion in it. That’s RIDICULOUS.

Edge grabs a headlock as Heyman defends Pac from an attack by Ross that doesn’t really exist. On Sunday, Edge has an IC Title match against Christian. It’s also a ladder match. Think that might steal the show a bit? Pac sends Edge over the top and hits a sweet baseball slide to take Edge out. Back in with a chinlock by Waltman. Big spinwheel kick gets two. He loads up the Bronco Buster but it gets countered with a spear, which isn’t quite a finisher yet. Edge-O-Matic gets two. After hitting the post, a flapjack and the Impaler finish Pac.

Rating: C. Pretty decent match here and I can’t emphasize this enough: you can have a coherent match that has a small story in it in less than five minutes. That’s what they did here and it was pretty entertaining. Then again, you had two talented guys in there so it worked out pretty well. Edge would get the title on Sunday.

Post match JR whispers something to Edge. It seems to shake him up and he runs off.

In the back Edge is frantically trying to leave. He runs into Christian and says their mom has been in an accident and they need to get to Toronto. Some Alliance guys try to stop him and Christian turns on Edge, revealing himself to be the newest member of the Alliance. Heyman officially announces Christian as the newest member.

Angle has on a bandana and sunglasses like Taker.

Booker T/Steve Austin vs. Undertaker/Kurt Angle

It’s a brawl to start on the floor until Booker and Angle officially get us going. Off to Taker vs. Austin with Austin hitting the Thesz Press. He hits three ropes for the flipping off elbow and gets caught by the throat. Austin manages to get Booker in and one Texan takes down the taller one with an axe kick. Spinarooni is broken up by a clothesline from Taker and here’s Angle.

To the floor and Kurt tastes some steel. Austin and Booker take turns beating him up and Austin hooks a chinlock. Angle is bleeding a bit under his eye. There’s an ankle lock out of nowhere but Booker breaks it up. There’s a tag to Taker who JUMPS OVER THE TOP ROPE. My mind is blown. There’s goes the referee but Taker can’t chokeslam Booker. Austin is knocked to the floor but Test runs in to break up the Last Ride.

He kicks Kurt down too and Kane comes down to even the odds. Taker and Booker fight into the crowd and Austin hits Angle with a belt for two. Austin hits the second referee but both guys get low blows to put everyone down. RVD runs in and hits a HUGE Five Star to Angle for Austin to get the pin. You know, because we can’t have RVD as the top face the audience wants him to be right?

Rating: C+. It was fine for a main event tag match but it had all of the wonderful overbooking that you grow to expect from the WWF in this period. Not much to see but it advanced three matches for Sunday, which they really needed because this has been a pretty lousy go home show.

Overall Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one at all. It doesn’t make me want to watch No Mercy and I barely got into the flow of things at all. Everything was focused on the main event but without context it’s really all over the place. Today’s product is really good at throwing you into the mix very quickly but making sure things don’t get too heavy. This didn’t do that and the build for the show suffers as a result. Not a bad show, but it doesn’t help to build for No Mercy that well at all.

Here’s No Mercy if you’re interested:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: May 28, 2001
Location: Saddledome, Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Attendance: 12,477
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

Tonight we keep going with the King of the Ring build and more of Austin vs. the Canadians. I think I vaguely remember this show but I’m not sure. There’s one major thing that happens tonight which is the start of something big and you’ll know what I’m talking about when we get there. The card looks decent so let’s get to it.

We get a video from Smackdown where Benoit and Jericho defended their titles in a TLC match, which I’ve actually reviewed. Here’s the Smackdown if you’re interested:

http://forums.wrestlezone.com/showthread.php?p=3422809#post3422809

It’s a shame we didn’t have the title change here in Calgary. Can you imagine the pop for that?

A courier sent JR a letter earlier today saying Undertaker’s wife would be here tonight. It wasn’t signed. And so it begins. That’s not the big thing I was referencing earlier either.

Here’s Vince to open things up. He doesn’t like being in Calgary and they don’t seem too happy to see him either. Vince talks about how in Canada, French and English can get along and that amazes him. Some people even feel proud to say they’re Canadian. Think that pops the audience much? Vince thinks maybe Canadians are happy to have brought Americans hockey, strong beer, or the word “eh”. However, Americans should never go to Canada.

Cue Jericho….and his mic doesn’t work. Vince: “That must have been a Canadian microphone.” Jericho gets right to the point: he wants Austin for the title and he wants him tonight. Vince declines so Jericho accuses him of wearing a toupee. He brings up Vince being a genetic jackhammer and says that Vince has made two sl***: Stephanie, and his new one: Austin. Vince also is a great singer, and with that we get the always awesome Stand Back video. Vince is ticked so he gives Jericho his title shot. Just not against Austin. It’s against Big Show for the Hardcore Title.

Cue Benoit who says he can’t just “STAND BACK” and let Jericho have all the fun. Benoit says that he should get the match with Austin. He even has more footage from Stand Back night, this part focusing more on Vince’s dancing abilities. Benoit gets to face Rhyno. Whoever is more impressive in their individual matches gets Austin for the title. Somehow this segment took twenty minutes.

Stu Hart (looking like he had no idea where he is) and his family are here.

Hardy Boys vs. Justin Credible/X-Pac

Justin vs. Jeff starts us off and it’s off to their partners a few seconds in. Matt gets crotched on the post and Lita’s evening is ruined according to Heyman. Bronco Buster to Matt. Oh and Eddie is here with the Hardys. When the referee isn’t looking, Lita crotches Pac on the post as payback for her unattended vagina that night. Hot tag brings in Jeff and he cleans house. Eddie breaks up a double superkick, allowing the Hardys to hit their finishers on Pac for the pin.

Rating: C-. Really quick match here but they didn’t get boring or anything. Eddie would be gone after Smackdown due to rehab and so we never found out where this was going. I’d asssume it would be to an eventual Eddie heel turn, possibly with Lita, but there’s no way to really know. Decent match though.

Eddie saves Matt from Albert post match.

Trish and Terri fight over a mirror.

Tajiri is cleaning Regal’s office when Albert comes in and demands a match with Eddie. Regal says ok.

Chris Benoit vs. Rhyno

Rhyno goes for the bad ribs immediately, hurting Benoit with a gorilla press drop. Benoit snaps off the rolling Germans and the Crossface but Rhyno grabs the rope. The Gore hits but Benoit rolls to the floor. Benoit fight back and hits the Rolling Germans again but opts for some chops instead of covering. A superplex puts the man beast down for two. The Gore is countered into the Crossface for the tap. This was short but intense. Not enough to rate though.

We recap the Blackman/Trish/Grandmaster thing. Sexay thinks shenanigans of a sexual nature were afoot.

Steve Blackman/Trish Stratus vs. Perry Saturn/Terri

At least the girls look good. Saturn is loopy and Terri is in a skin colored bikini. Nice to see she’s taking this seriously. The men start us off and Saturn hammers him down. The girls come in to wake the crowd up a bit and Trish is just not that good yet. The guys come in again and Blackman dominates. Terri interferes and gets spanked. Catfight time and here’s your major moment: Lance Storm runs in and superkicks Saturn so Blackman can get the pin.

And that was the start of the Invasion.

The match was junk and too short to rate again. It sucked, although the girls looked good.

During the break, Storm ran out of the building, celebrated with Shane, and left in a limo. Paul: “It’s just begun.”

Vince FREAKS on security in the back.

Al Snow is at WWF New York. He talks about his new show: Tough Enough.

Spike and Molly are all lovey dovey in the back. I see why these two never talked. Spike is about to kiss her when Angle comes in. He says it’ll be a mistake and offers them a lesson in the birds of the bees. Spike protests and smacks Angle. Just guess how well that goes for Spike. Molly goes looking for the Dudleys to help Spike but they just happen to run out in front of the Hollies, who beat down the Dudleys. See how simply a story and feud can be made?

After a break the Dudleys are yelling at Spike. Molly is going through a table.

Hardcore Title: Chris Jericho vs. Big Show

Lillian says Jericho is also the IC Champion, which is completely wrong. Jericho lost that title almost two months before this. He runs past Show and gets in the ring first, hitting a baseball slide to take over. A chair shot doesn’t work as Show knocks it away. Remember he’s still banged up from TLC. Show take over with the power game and throws around various metal object.

Jericho manages to dropkick a chair into Show’s knee but is then easily tossed head first into a trashcan. Total dominance so far. Show misses a legdrop onto a trashcan and Jericho gets in a few shots which don’t get him anywhere. Show puts him on the middle rope and picks up the steps. Jericho manages to fire off a dropkick into the steel to knock them into Show’s head and a fast Lionsault gives him his second title at the moment.

Rating: C. I don’t know why but I liked this. Jericho sold like a master and I can actually buy the ending because it puts Jericho over very strong. The finish was clean too, as Jericho didn’t cheat at all to win this, given the structure of the rules. Fun match and I have no idea why I liked it as much as I did, since there certainly isn’t much to it.

Jericho holds up both belts on the stage and turns around into a Gore by Rhyno to give him the Hardcore Title.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Albert

Dig that X-Factor theme. That’s the only good thing they had going for them. Eddie pounds away as fast as he can but Albert catches him and starts using the power. BIG gorilla press puts Eddie down. Eddie gets in a dropkick to the knee but his dive to the floor is caught and Albert rams him into the post. Eddie counters a powerbomb but Albert runs him over again. Lita comes running out as Eddie counters a Baldo Bomb into a rollup for the pin. Too short to rate but Eddie did his usual good stuff. No idea what Lita added to this.

Mick Foley was on the Today Show about his new book which is also a New York Times #1 bestseller. Can you imagine a wrestler today writing a book and having it go to #1 on the New York Times bestseller list? Foley did it TWICE.

We get the first of the Stalking Sara videos where someone is filming Undertaker’s pretty blonde wife at her house. The reveal would be awesome at the time and then would totally fall flat on its face.

The Hollies talk about the tables match and Molly begs to keep Spike from going through the table.

The Canadian Chrises talk about getting the title match tonight when Vince comes in. Both of them have impressed him and they’ve both earned a title shot at Stone Cole. Austin wants to fight them both at the same time but Vince isn’t letting that happen. Benoit gets the shot. Post show Vince wants to know where the Stand Back footage came from. Jericho gives him a pep talk. He wants the first shot and Benoit has no problem with that.

Tajiri broke something in Regal’s office but Vince comes in before he can get fired. Tajiri bows a lot and Vince doesn’t get it. Regal sends Tajiri off to get some coffee for Vince. “Bloody foreigners.” Vince says Austin has a brilliant idea for the main event and tells Regal to make sure to watch, but he won’t say what it is.

Dudley Boys vs. Hollys

This is a tables match. Just the four people in this one so no Spike or Molly, but they’re at ringside. I think you only have to put one person through a table to win. The Hollys take over to start and Crash brings in a table. Bubba prevents Hardcore from powerbombing D-Von through it and JR says he thinks Hardcore was attempting a powerbomb. Was it when he powerbombed D-Von that gave him away Jimbo?

The cousins try to throw Crash into Bubba through a table but instead Bubba moves and Crash just bounces off of it and lands on his head. FREAKING OW MAN!!! What’s Up Hardcore? It’s Table Time but Hardcore dropkicks them down. Not that it matters because there’s a 3D through the table for Hardcore and the win.

Rating: C-. Not bad but nothing to remember. I think this blew off their feud which was a fine little feud that was aired on TV. Why they don’t do more of that I’m not sure, but it was perfectly fine, it brought in some new blood to the tag division (which didn’t stay around but whatever) and it came to a logical conclusion. Now why can’t they do that more often?

The Dudleys try to put Molly through a table so Spike says put me through it instead. For some reason he thinks laying on the table is going to stop them, and I think you know what’s coming. Molly is powerbombed through Spike through the table. Molly keeps asking if Spike is ok as she goes out.

We talk about the semi-huge white elephant in the room: HHH isn’t here. We get a video of him in the office of Dr. James Andrews and him getting the diagnosis. It’ll be six weeks of crutches and then at least four months to heal before we even start rehabilitation. HHH talks about being put in the Walls of Jericho and then collapsing after the match ended. He knows he’ll be back and it was never if he would be back.

The next day was the surgery and I know the timing is bad but my goodness Stephanie is beautiful. This was a bad quad tear because the tear was under the first layer of muscle which made it hard to find. The repair was good though. JR says he’ll be out at least four months, which wound up being closer to seven.

WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. Chris Benoit

I remember this match happening and I fell asleep before it ended so I’ve never seen this all the way through. For some reason Lillian doesn’t introduce them here. Instead the Fink does big match intros. I guess she got the night off for the screw up earlier? Benoit has taped up ribs. Fink’s voice is just perfect. There’s something right about him introducing the world title match.

Austin goes after the bad ribs immediately and Benoit tries for a home run Crossface. Remember we’re in Canada so everything Benoit does gets a big eruption. He chops away but Austin his the Thesz Press. Benoit grabs a Crossface and the place explodes. Austin finally gets a rope and they go to the floor. The challenger gets fired into the steps and we go back into the ring.

Benoit gets a Sharpshooter and it’s in the middle of the ring. The place goes nuts and Benoit pulls him back to the middle of the ring. Austin FINALLY gets a rope and the booing is great. Out to the floor and Austin suplexes Benoit onto the announce table which doesn’t break. There’s an abdominal stretch back in the ring. I think JR’s voice is about to go. Benoit gets it broken due to the referee seeing Austin cheating and here are some rolling Germans.

We go up and Chris looks for a superplex but Austin counters and slams him face first onto the mat. Austin’s superplex gets two. Austin tries a belt shot but Hebner takes it from him. Back in the ring we get a Stunner but Vince is arguing with Hebner. Benoit gets up and clocks Austin with the belt but the count is delayed so it’s only a two. This is REALLY good stuff. Another Stunner attempt is countered into the Crossface but Vince pulls the referee out. Hebner shoves Vince down but Austin gets the ropes again. And then in a HORRIBLE ending, Austin puts the Crossface on and Vince says ring the bell. Yep, they did that.

Rating: B+. Until the ending, this was excellent. I’d love to see these two get twenty five minutes in a PPV main event and let them let it all hang out, but I’ll have to settle for a 12 minute Raw main event instead. Great match which I was getting into 10 years later and knowing the ending. That should say a lot about how great it was.

Jericho comes out and puts Austin in the Walls while Vince is in the Crossface.

Overall Rating: B+. I really liked this show. A lot of stuff happened on it and we get a great main event on top of it. Plus you get the starts of the Stalker and Invasion, which are both pretty big deals. Unfortunately the Invasion would be one of the worst run angles in the history of wrestling if not the worst, so we kind of peaked early. More would come soon enough though. Great show.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: December 12, 2011
Location: Norfolk Scope Arena, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the Slammys! I used to love these things when I was a kid and they were so campy and entertaining. Now they’re just kind of here and they’re usually a way to have some minor stories set up for the next few weeks/months. The main event tonight is Cena vs. Henry, which somehow is a pretty big showdown. It’s also the go home show for TLC, which is kind of a minor aspect given the three hour nature of this. Let’s get to it.

We open with a Slammy presentation. This is for the Tell Me I Did Not Just See That Moment of the Year. Booker presents it…along with Horny. Horny has an afro wig and keeps doing chest bumps with Booker.

The nominees are:

JR dancing
Santino almost winning the Royal Rumble
A fan throws water at R-Truth
Miz impersonates Rock

It’s JR dancing. I can live with that as that was pretty awesome. JR comes out…and here’s Cole to cut him off because that’s what Cole does. Cole says JR is fat and Booker calls him a loser. Strap in people: Cole vs. Booker can go on for HOURS. Booker says JR can beat Cole in a rap off. Cole’s is awful and I think everyone expected that. JR says he doesn’t need music. His actually has something resembling a rhythm to it and there’s music to it anyway. And then he stops rhyming all together. Guess who the fans say win. This very well may have been the worst opening in the history of professional wrestling.

Oh and JR does a Spinarooni. Ok more like he looks like he has a heart attack and convulses on the mat for a bit.

Here are Foley and Ted DiBiase Senior to present the Holy Censored Moment of the Year. This pairing is about as awesome as anything in the history of, ahem, Mankind. They try to figure out why they’re paired together. DiBiase says that he is an ordained minister. Foley: “So if that makes you the holy, then I guess that makes me the…..” DiBise: *EVIL LAUGH*

The nominees are:

Sheamus powerbombs Sin Cara through a ladder
The RKO to a leaping Christian onto the steps
The ring breaking
Evan Bourne’s shooting star off the ladder

Gee I wonder what’s going to win. If you can’t figure this out, you fail. Show comes out to accept and thanks the Sports Entertainment Academy of Arts and Sports. He thinks the World Heavyweight Championship would look good next to the Slammy. Nice little promo for the match on Sunday and for his match which is next.

Big Show vs. Wade Barrett

Barrett says what he’ll do to Orton at TLC will earn him that award Big Show just won. Then again that award is for something unexpected and everyone knows what he’s going to do to Orton. After a break we’re joined in progress with Barrett on the floor trying to get up. There’s a table set up at ringside now. There’s also a chair and a ladder. Barrett avoids going through the table and hits a big boot to put Show’s head on the table.

Show gets up as Barrett is ready to jump and then the bald man breaks the table. With Barrett on the apron on the outside, Show chops him in the chest and knocks him into the ring. Barrett goes to the floor and brings in a chair. Show knocks it out of his hands….and wins by DQ at 1:38? It’s going to be one of those nights isn’t it?

Of all people, the Road Dogg is doing this one. Yes, that Road Dogg. He’s in a DX shirt and is doing the Pipe Bomb of the year, which I think is the weird moment of the year.

There aren’t any real nominees but more along the lines of a bunch of R-Truth moments plus a hand full of others. This is just a big comedy montage for all intents and purposes, which is a great reminder of some stuff, namely Punk and Truth. The winner is…..CM Punk. Ok I can live with that.

Punk comes out with….a mannequin? It’s got a blonde wig and a t-shirt that says…..OH MY GOODNESS IT’S A DYNAMIC DUDES SHIRT!!!!! Punk says that he wants to talk about something tonight that is a special cause. This person works behind the scenes and is incredibly boring, just like this mannequin. Naturally it’s Johnny Ace and Punk has a tribute video. It’s set to a song that I’ve heard before but can’t place. We get Dynamic Dudes clips in there too which makes this worth a smile. After the video Punk is trying not to crack up. He accepts the award on Punk’s behalf and does a decent impression of him.

Lita is here to present the Divalicious Moment of the Year. Yep she’s still hot. I don’t think half the people know who she is.

The nominees are:

natalya putting the Sharpshooter on Eve and I think Alicia.
Kelly winning the Divas Title.
Kharma destroying Michelle.
Beth’s top rope Glam Slam to Eve.

Of course it goes to Kelly because she’s supposed to be some kind of female hero or something. Beth comes out to take the award from her and gets slapped.

Santino presents the OMG Moment of the Year. The Bellas are with him and they look good in those red dresses. After an argument over whether it’s o-m-g or OMG (pronounced like a word), here are the nominees.

HHH tombstones the Undertaker.
Rock Bottom to Cena at Mania.
The Walk Out.
Punk Leaves With The Title.

HHH wins. Are you freaking kidding me? He makes his big return with the hammer…and walks to the ring without his award. HHH says the real OMG moment was having Taker carried out for the first time in his career. He says the Undertaker is no more. HHH takes credit for ending the Streak. Are you kidding me? We get the video of Nash hitting him with the hammer a few months ago.

He says that maybe their 16 year relationship was based on lies and this Sunday all the lies and deceptions end. On Sunday he’ll show the world that he’s right and that Nash is simply done. Well he was done 13 years ago. Do we really need a match for that? HHH leaves and implies he’ll hit Santino with the hammer but lets him run instead.

Otunga and Tony Atlas are here for the Trending Superstar of the Year. Tony does the laugh as Otunga tries to be serious. The award goes to whichever superstar listed is trending on Twitter the fastest. Get this over with. They’ll be in a fatal fourway with the winner of the match meaning nothing but the first to be trending winning the Slammy.

Cody Rhodes vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Zack Ryder

Or is the winner of the match the winner of the award? Do they have any idea what’s going on here? Ryder and Bryan send the champs to the floor and hit stereo dives as we take a break. Back with Ryder and Bryan squaring off and they change the rules AGAIN, saying that it’s whoever trends first. THEN WHY HAVE THE MATCH??? Bryan and Ryder have a decent back and forth segment with them hitting cross bodies to put them both down.

Rhodes and Ziggler tease a staredown but think better of it so they can stomp the good guys. They get in a shoving match and Bryan tries to steal a pin. Rhodes and Bryan have a LONG pinfall reversal sequence but Bryan is sent to the floor. Ryder follows him and Ziggler tries to roll up Rhodes. Alabama Slam to Dolph gets two. They take a second break with Cody standing tall.

Back with Rhodes having Ryder in a Figure Four which doesn’t last long. Rhodes charges into some knees in the corner but Dolph breaks up the Broski Boot. Everyone is in the ring and everyone goes down. Beautiful Disaster hits Ziggler for two and Bryan goes off with the rapid fire kicks to Cody. Bryan goes up but gets crotched. Ziggler gets drilled by Ryder but stops Ryder as he goes up. Both heels hit superplexes and everyone is down again. Rough Ryder to Ziggler, Cross Rhodes to Ryder, LeBell Lock to Rhodes, Sleeper to Bryan, Zig Zag to Bryan and that gets the pin at 15:22.

Rating: B-. Fun match but as Lawler said, the match wasn’t important. What was important was trending on Twitter. That right there sums up almost everything that is wrong with Raw anymore. They’re so obsessed with getting people to notice them and accept them because they’re trending on Twitter 50 times a night and they have to tell us they’re trending on Twitter 50 times a night and it drives people crazy. And they wonder why no one buys their PPVs and why no one is watching their shows.

Ryder wins the award, because the match was pointless. He gets a Zig Zag for his efforts.

Christian returns to present Game Changer of the Year. He gives himself courageous moment of the year first of all. This is for one moment that changes everything. Here are the nominees.

HHH telling Vince and the pink jacket that he’s relieved of his duties.
Edge’s retirement speech.
Kevin Nash returns.
Rock and Cena making the main event of Mania a year early.

Cena and Rock win, as they probably should. Cena says he should only get half of the credit for this and introduces Rock. Oh wait this is a live show so he’s not here. “But he said he’d never leave!” We do have a satellite clip though. Oh wait no we don’t because he didn’t have time for that either. “This is worse than JR’s rap.” He apologizes for Team Bring It for not bringing it. However, this makes the award mean more because Rock is going to see this soon and hopefully it fires him up even more. This award is for changing the game for a year, but at Mania they change the game forever.

Alberto Del Rio/The Miz vs. CM Punk/Randy Orton

Punk vs. Miz starts us off. Off to Del Rio vs. Orton quickly and the Viper gets beaten down by both heels. We’re in standard tag formula mode quickly tonight. Punk gets a hot tag quickly and cleans house but the GTS is broken up, allowing Miz to guillotine Punk on the ropes as we take a break. Back with Punk backsliding Miz for two. Del Rio comes in and works over the arm a lot.

This is your usual main event style tag match: it’s the same formula with one guy getting beaten down for a long time until the other big face comes in off a hot tag and cleans house to set up the ending. The Finale and the GTS are countered but Punk’s kick to the head of Miz can’t get the tag. Barrett runs in through the crowd to take out Orton. Miz can’t hit the corner clothesline but he counters the GTS into the Finale for the clean pin on Punk at 12:42. Forget what I said about the formula I guess.

Rating: C-. The ending was a VERY nice surprise and it gives some heat to the main event on Sunday, which is certainly a good thing. Not a horrible match but Del Rio and Miz are pretty weak in the ring. Del Rio is boring all around but that goes without saying. It helped to push the title match though so that made it a lot better.

Miz and Del Rio beat up Punk post match and he gets put in the armbreaker using the ladder.

Vickie presents A-Lister of the Year. And here’s Goldust to present with her. He says she wears more makeup than she does.

The nominees are:

The Muppets
Hugh Jackman
Snooki
Cee-Lo Green

And it goes to Snooki because the WWE is stupid. She gives a pre-recorded message.

Mark Henry says he’ll do more to Big Show Sunday than he has already.

Here’s Sheamus but he’s interrupted by Jinder Mahal. Ok then. He rambles for awhile and gets his head kicked off. That’s it. There’s a referee there but there was no bell and no cover or anything.

Rey Mysterio comes out to present Superstar of the Year. The nominees are:

Orton
Miz
Henry
Punk
Del Rio
Cena

Ace comes out and accepts for him because he’s banged up.

Second Coming video. The word control flashes on the screen to end this.

We hear a story about a soldier in Afghanistan that hugged Vince when she saw him and opened her phone to show him her son with a WWE Title belt. Her son and husband are in the front row. That’s cool.

Mark Henry vs. John Cena

This is due to Cena costing Henry a win last week over Ryder. The bell rang at 1055 so this isn’t going to last long. We go to a break less than a minute in. Back with Henry in control,. Cena tries a slam but falls backwards. Off to a neck vice but Cena suplexes his way out of it. He hits the Shuffle but collapses on an AA attempt which gets two for Mark. Henry calls Cena Mr. USA I think.

Cena avoids a powerslam and hammers away but the shoulders don’t put Henry down. Instead Cena jumps into a bearhug and he’s in trouble. He escapes for a few seconds and hits the Slam but falls down afterwards. Then some fire goes off and KANE is back. He has a modified version of the old music and looks like he’s wearing a metal mask. He chokeslams Cena and I guess it’s thrown out at we’ll say 9 minutes. The mask looks ridiculous, but he takes it off post chokeslam to reveal a more traditional one. There’s Cena’s match for Sunday I guess.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here but the end was the whole point of it. Kane was someone that needed to return, if nothing else to give Cena something to do on Sunday. The mask being back….why? His video has the shot of him not in a mask, but he’s wearing one here. I don’t get it, but that sums up most of WWE at this point for me.

Overall Rating: D+. This show didn’t do it for me. I mean it really didn’t do it for me. The awards were pretty weak and while there were a few nice surprises, they didn’t really help get the show going, at least not for me. It wasn’t bad and I’ve definitely seen worse stuff, but this didn’t do much. The crowd didn’t care but I think that’s due to the nature of the show more than anything else. Too much talking too and not a good show overall, but it had its spots. Nice surprise at the end too.

Results
Big Show b. Wade Barrett via DQ when Barrett used a chair
Dolph Ziggler b. Daniel Bryan, Cody Rhodes and Zach Ryder – Zig Zag to Bryan
The Miz/Alberto Del Rio b. Randy Orton/CM Punk – Skull Crushing Finale to Punk
John Cena vs. Mark Henry went to a no contest when Kane interfered

Here’s TLC if you’re interested:

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 25, 1998
Location: UTC Arena, Chattanooga, Tennessee
Attendance: 6,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s FINALLY the go home show for Over the Edge so I think you know what the focus of tonight is going to be. Expect a lot of Nation vs. DX and a lot of Austin vs. McMahon/Love. The match at the PPV is a classic so I hope the show leading up to it can be as good. This isn’t a live show which means very little for the sake of this but I need to fill in more space. Let’s get to it.

Here are Vince, the Stooges, and cops to open the show. We recap last week with the Stooges and Vince (dressed in a costume) beat down Austin to let Foley get the real beating in. However that’s going to pale in comparison to what happens on Sunday. He says that he got away with assault last Monday. Vince runs down the stipulations of the match and what everyone is going to be doing. Cue Austin and the eruption that comes with him.

Austin curses a lot and tells the cops that he heard an admission of assault so cuff him. Somehow it actually works and Vince is taken away by the cops. The Stooges try to keep it from happening and Austin says that looks like obstruction of justice. That gets the Stooges cuffed as well and I can’t help but think that Patterson is a little aroused by this. Austin pulls out a beer and pours it over Vince as he’s taken away.

Legion of Doom vs. Disciples of Apocolypse

It’s a six man here with the debut of Droz. His name is Puke here but screw that. He gets beaten down by Chainz on the floor. Well so much for that. Animal vs. let’s say Skull starts us off. Off to Droz who hits a clothesline and then gets beaten down again. He can throw a decent dropkick though. That’s enough for him I guess as he goes out quickly. Still better than Garrett Bischoff.

Hawk (who still doesn’t look right with hair) is beaten down in the corner after being in control for about 4 seconds. Well to be fair he was supposed to be drunk or high so it’s kind of excusable. Chainz and Hawk collide which lets Chainz get two. Can we have Hawk shoot up in the ring? It would be more entertaining than this. Off to Droz and everything breaks down. Droz hits a three point clothesline and a Batista Bomb on Chainz for the pin.

Rating: D. This feud was so boring and thankfully I think it ended very soon after this. I don’t think it was so much about the feud being over as much as Vince falling asleep from it. There’s no chemistry at all and the Warriors are just old here. Droz didn’t help things and his pill pusher character never went anywhere. Granted that could be because he was crippled.

Vince and the Stooges are led away in handcuffs. Austin talks more trash to them.

Dan Severn vs. Owen Hart

We get a video of Owen turning on Shamrock before this starts. Gee, I wonder what the ending of this is going to be. Severn is the NWA World Champion and that belt on Raw is still a bizarre sight to see. He takes Owen down very quickly and tries a cross armbreaker but Owen manages to avoid it. Severn chokes away and Owen starts throwing punches. The crowd really doesn’t care here. And then Owen kicks him low for….not a DQ? They go to the mat for a bit and Severn gets an armbar to draw in the Nation for the DQ.

Rating: D. This was nothing, partially because Severn really wasn’t an interesting wrestler at all. And people wonder why ROH gets eye rolls when they bring him in as a big deal. The match was just for the postmatch beatdown, but I really don’t get the point of this for the most part. It was pretty worthless for the most part though.

The Nation destroys Severn but they can’t quite Pillmanize his leg due to referee interference.

Austin was on Celebrity Deathmatch last week and will be again this week.

Vince is still in the squad car.

Edge is still coming.

Here’s the Jackyl who has with him Hank the Angry Drunken Dwarf and Crackhead Bob from the Howard Stern Show. Hank had recently been voted the World’s Most Beautiful Person by People Matazine’s website so he curses about that a lot. Bob yells a lot. This is stupid if you couldn’t tell. Jackyl says we’re not done yet and brings out Luna, Golga (Earthquake) and Giant Silva.

Golga vs. Thrasher

If you don’t know what’s coming here, you’re beyond my help. Bob sits in on commentary while the dominance commences. Total squash of course that takes longer than it should. It ended with a powerslam if you’re interested. Silva beats up Most for fun. The referee too.

Vince is still in the car as Austin talks trash to him.

Vader vs. Jeff Jarrett

Austin has agreed to let Vince and company go if certain conditions are met. No word on what those are yet. Vader pounds Jarrett down and hits a splash but there’s no referee due to Tennessee Lee. Then he does it again. Jarrett goes after the knee as Vader goes after Lee. The fans cheer for Vader but they don’t know what they want to see right Vince? Jarrett works over the knee until Vader runs over him. I’ve always liked that. Vader hits a middle rope splash but Kane runs in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Better than the opener as the fans were into it, but still pretty dull. Jarrett was so freaking boring as the country singer guy and it was no exception here. He wuldn’t change characters until like July and it couldn’t have come soon enough. Vader still had it but they were already burying him, saying he wasn’t in top shape on commentary. The second run-in finish of the night isn’t helping things either.

Kane destroys Vader post match.

Vince is out of the car. Austin makes him apologize but Vince calls him the former champion. That’s not good enough so Vince has to do it again. Austin says Vince is a good kid and they all get unhancuffed.

Here are Vince and the Stooges after the second hour begins. No commercial though which makes this seem more realistic. Vince looking all messed up is a nice visual. He freaks out on Austin for treating him so badly and insists he DID NOT mean his apology. Austin made a condition that there had to be a WWF guy at the match Sunday to keep Vince in line. Vince is cool with that because no one on the roster can intimidate him. He makes Austin vs. Taker tonight.

DX was at an airport earlier. This is another of their “secret missions”. HHH had a speech but says Raw is too full of hot angles so they have to cut it short. HHH is going to be flying the plane and says it’s a very dangerous mission so he may never see them again. He gets in the wrong plane and that’s it. Ok then.

Al Snow jumps the guardrail and gets in the ring. Then he gets out of the ring and grabs Jerry, demanding his meeting with Vince. Security pulls him off.

Taka Michinoku vs. Dick Togo

Taka is Light Heavyweight Champion but this isn’t a title match because he’s not allowed to defend the title I guess. Also, Togo still has the best name EVER. There’s a spin wheel kick by Taka to send Togo to the floor and there’s his signature dive to the floor. Back in and another dive runs into a dropkick. Taka gets knocked into the railing and there’s a flip dive from the apron. Togo grabs a nerve hold for about a second and then hits a powerslam for two. Taka fights back but his tornado DDT is countered. A standing rana gets the pin for him though.

Rating: C. The match was fine but it was pretty uninteresting. This feud went on for awhile until they pulled the plug on Taka as champion and had him join Kai En Tai, putting the Light Heavyweight Title on this new guy named Christian who had a little bit better career I’d certainly think. Fun match, but it had nothing on what WCW was doing at the time and this division never did.

Post match the other Kai En Tai members come in and beat up Taka.

Back to the airport for more DX hijinks. Apparently HHH has flown off and they have no idea where he went. They all suggest they can fly after him but no one does. Rockabilly is mentioned.

Marc Mero vs. Farrooq

Sable forcibly rips the rope off Mero and he’s not happy about it. Mero starts off fast but gets caught in a powerslam. We go to the floor where Mero hides behind Sable. Mero stomps away again and Sable pops up on the apron. Mero tells her to get down and walks into a clothesline for the pin. This was just for the Sable/Mero stuff.

Mero freaks out on her post match and says that on Sunday, Sable can bring anyone she wants to meet him in a match. If they do, she’s free. If he wins, she’s gone forever. It would wind up being her vs. Mero with Sable losing. She’d be back in a few months.

Video on Pat Patterson and how awesome he is.

HHH is flying around (“I’m in the COCKpit!”) and says he’s flying around Nitro, writing messages in smoke for the WCW fans, such as DX Rules, WCW Sucks! Stupid but I’ve seen worse.

HHH vs. The Rock

This works. Non-title here. Before we get started though, Rock says the fans want to know how he feels about Viagara. However, since he doesn’t need it, he has no comment on it. He’ll also beat Farrooq on Sunday. As for HHH, DX is obsessed with their anatomies. Rock has something hard waiting for him: the Rock Bottom. After a break, here’s HHH and we’re ready to go.

Feeling out process to start and they’re more or less playing chess with each other. They trade headlocks and both guys go to the floor. Chyna interferes but is counteracted by Mark Henry. Back in the Rock takes over. Henry interferes, drawing Chyna up to the apron. The distraction allows a belt shot to HHH but Chyna makes the save and we take a break. Back with the People’s Elbow getting two.

HHH fights back with a clothesline and a crotch chop to Henry. Henry gets on the apron so Chyna pops Rock with a title as well. That was nice. HHH drops the knee (missed by four inches) for two. He stomps away but Rock hits a swinging neckbreaker to get two. Pedigree is countered into a backdrop to the floor. Henry stomps on HHH but Chyna pops him with a chair. HHH saves her and they fight on the floor to a double countout.

Rating: C-. Rock vs. HHH is one of those matches you always have to take a look at. This was nothing special but they would really heat things up over the summer, culminating in one of my all time favorites at Summerslam in their ladder match for the IC Title. The ending had to be that way because they were both champions, but you could see the chemistry out there.

HHH says bring it and Rock leaves. Farrooq pops up behind the future Great One and piledrives him on the stage.

Vince is going to be the guest referee for the main event.

Steve Austin vs. The Undertaker

Before Austin arrives, Taker chokeslams Vince. He loads up the Tombstone but here’s Kane. They slug it out and fight into the crowd. With Vince down here comes Austin. Stunner to both Stooges and he ties Vince up in the ropes. Austin grabs a chair and Vince is panicking. Here’s Dude Love with a chair of his own but Austin is ready for him and smacks his chair into Dude’s into Dude’s head. It’s so refreshing to see smart faces.

Overall Rating: C+. If there’s one thing Raw never did wrong at this point, it was the go home show. This set up the PPV perfectly with I believe everything outside of Jarrett vs. Blackman getting some time and I think we’re all thankful for that. Not much as far as wrestling goes but it’s 1998 so I don’t think anyone is surprised by that. Good stuff though and we got a classic main event out of Austin vs. Foley.

Here’s Over the Edge if you’re interested.

http://forums.wrestlezone.com/showthread.php?p=1111563#post1111563

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Who do you think it is?  We’ve seen videos for it time after time, but who do you think it is?

My guess:Unfortunately I think it’ll be Jericho or Undertaker.  It’s a shame but I think those are the only realistic options.  Jericho is a guy I wouldn’t mind coming back, but i want him as a face.  HIs heel stuff is entertaining enough, but he comes off like a second class level guy as a heel most of the time.  Losing to Cena like 5000 times didn’t help this.  Taker I’m just over at this point.  Get to 20-0 already so he can retire.

Your thoughts?

The ratings are down again this week and so I’ll throw the title question out to you: how would you make Raw more exciting/better?

My theory:Make the show more cliffhanger based.  There’s almost no reason to watch from one week to another unless you already watch the show.  When you think about it, when is the last time you saw a Raw end where you had to tune in the next week to see the next part of a story?  Everything is self-contained anymore and it’s like they’re starting from scratch every week.  I’m not saying have it turn into Nitro with everything being a cliffhanger where you have to TUNE INTO NEXT WEEK’S NITRO TO FIND OUT, but make it more than so and so stands tall to end the show.  That gets really boring really fast.

Oh and stop talking about Twitter and promote your shows.

Your thoughts?

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 5, 2011
Location: St. Pete Times Forum, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

There are two shows left before TLC and one of them is the Slammies so this is going to be a normal show by comparison. Last week’s show rocked so let’s hope this one can do the same. For some reason they’re trying to push the idea that all of a sudden Cena is having so many issues with the fans after saying for years that its their right. As usual, WWE doesn’t get that some people have no idea what they’re talking about. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Cena to kick things off. He talks about last week with Piper and how the fans have a mixed reaction to him. He says that he knows the fans aren’t all in love with him, but without them, there’s no show. Without the fans, there’s no work. Therefore, every fan has earned the right to think whatever they want about him.

However, the thing that mattered last week was the slap to the face of Cena. He kind of drops that though and starts talking about CM Punk. He says that the only thing bigger than Rock vs. Cena at Wrestlemania is Rock vs. Cena for the WWE Title at Wrestlemania. That brings out Del Rio. Oh geez not a #1 contender match between these two. Del Rio brings up the “If Punk gets disqualified he loses the title” thing from last week and shows the clip of the GTS to the exposed buckle last week.

That brings out Vickie with Ziggler. She says it should be Dolph that should get the title shot. I can’t really argue with that one. Dolph says he’ll be a dual champion and blah blah blah. Cena says Dolph is the Show Off now (because he heard Cole say it 25 times last week) but it should be Jerk Off. Ziggler says if the two of you want to have a #1 contender match for the US Title, go ahead. Cena says that the US Title shot belongs to Zack Ryder.

After Ziggler talks about how that’s a dead horse, here’s Miz because we don’t have enough people out there yet. We get some clips of Miz beating up Morrison and Truth, along with an announcement that Morrison has been released. Miz says that the Slammies are next week and he’ll be superstar of the year.

As he’s talking, here’s Johnny Ace who says he’s not boring. I had to rewind things because I dozed off there. Tonight there are going to be four matches, each pitting one of these guys against a Smackdown guy. The winners will ALL go to the WWE Title match at TLC. Oh wait not Cena because he’s in a special match called a “social experiment” which Ace will tell him about later. Miz’s match is right now against this man.

The Miz vs. Randy Orton

Basic start with neither guy really being able to take over. Orton tries to speed things up but Miz takes over with a Garvin Stomp and a running shot for two. Time for the chinlock and now we’re off to Twitterville. Orton makes his comeback and hits the powerslam. They head to the floor and Orton slams him again. Cue Barrett for the distraction at a count of eight and Orton goes after him. Miz wins via countout at 4:32.

Rating: D. Nothing match here which was only around to get Miz into the title match and have more development with Barrett vs. Orton. Once that match finally happens they have to have Barrett win to keep up his momentum. The match SUCKED though and was painfully boring overall. Nothing to see here.

Video on WWE Network. It’s coming in 2012.

Ryder wants to talk to Ryder about the petition and says it doesn’t matter. Cue Cena in Ryder gear who goes on a rant about the match that Ace has planned for him. He even makes a Back to the Future reference for some reason. The Social Experiment is a match with Ryder. Uh….ok? If Ryder wins, he gets a US Title match. If Cena wins, he’s in the title match at TLC.

Otunga says that it’s Nash vs. HHH in a ladder match. Why? Apparently there’s going to be a sledgehammer above the ring and whoever gets it first gets to use it. Nash is cool with that. Nash starts to leave and Otunga says Nash has a match. He doesn’t care who it is.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is all taped up from the cage match on Tuesday. Del Rio works over the ribs to start (psychology as always), even draping him over the top rope. And then the cross armbreaker ends this at 1:48. That’s pretty much a squash, but at least Bryan was injured coming in.

Tribute to the Troops is next week.

Eve Torres/Kelly Kelly vs. Natalya/Beth Phoenix

If I didn’t write reviews for these shows, I’d be off to find a hot pretzel. We get a message from the heels but we get interrupted by a second coming video. He arrives on January 2, 2012. Ok then. And then announcers ignore it. Beth starts with Kelly and Kelly gets beaten down….and then Kelly hooks a small package for the pin at 1:10.

John Cena vs. Zack Ryder

This feels like a big match. Think about that for a second. Both guys are tentative to start. They fight over a long headlock and the fans are split as usual. Hip toss gets two for Cena. Notice something here: Cena is respecting Ryder and that’s the biggest rub Ryder can get. Ryder grabs a spinning neckbreaker for two. This is very slow.

A tornado DDT gets two for Ryder and he loads up the Rough Ryder. Cena ducks and initiates his finishing sequence. The AA is countered and Ryder puts him in the corner. Broski Boot looks to set up another Rough Ryder but Cena catches him in mid air and the AA is enough for the pin at 6:47.

Rating: C. The match was boring, but the important part is that they made Ryder look solid here. They needed to make sure that he saved face here and that’s what they did. Cena had to win here because Ryder would have been way over his head. Still though, dull match and i’m not sure why they did it.

Ryder is mad post match and Cena says hang on a second before running to the back.

Cena comes up to Ace and Otunag in the back. He shouts Otunga out and tells Ace to listen to the people and make Ryder #1 contender to Ziggler. Ace says no because Ryder blew it. Cena gets in his face and says be creative. Ace says Cena has to give up his title match at TLC. Cena isn’t sure of course but says he’s a ten time champion because he got opportunities along the way. Cena drops out and Ryder has to face….someone still. Ok then.

Kane is still coming again. That’s different than the Jan 2 thing. This video shows pictures of big named stars and Kane punching through a piece of glass. He puts the mask back on and opens his eye…then drops the mask which is on fire. It says his name this time. No date is given.

Otunga tells Robers to make this in essence a street fight.

Zack Ryder vs. Mark Henry

I think I smell interference. Henry has a bad ankle/leg here. Ryder gets beaten down like a chump to start which to be fair, he’s in over his head. Ryder gets him down for a second and rams the leg into the post. Cue Cena who hits the AA on Henry and throws Ryder on top for the pin at 2:20.

Vickie says she can’t get the decision reversed. Oh and Ziggler has to fight Sheamus later.

Kevin Nash vs. Santino Marella

Nash hits a side slam to start. Cole: “One, two, kick out by Santino…for some reason.” Powerbomb ends this at 1:03.

Post match Nash picks up the hammer but doesn’t hit Marella with it.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Sheamus

Feeling out process to start until Ziggler hits a GREAT dropkick for two. Sheamus is like “Irish story!” and hammers away with the forearms to the chest. Ziggler hooks a chinlock and a Fameasser gets two. Ziggler chokes again but Sheamus fights back, hitting a forearm in the corner. He loads up the High Cross but Ziggler escapes and Sheamus hits the post. Here’s Ryder for the distraction so that the Brogue Kick can keep Ziggler out of the world title match at 4:32.

Rating: C. Not bad here but it was nothing all that great. Still though, they didn’t really have a ton of time to work with out there. Ryder interfering was fine because it gives Ziggler a reason to want to beat him up at the PPV. This was more about a storyline than a match and that’s fine.

Rough Ryder to Ziggler post match.

Del Rio and Miz are in the ring and here’s Ace as well. He mentions Clay debuting but it hasn’t happened yet. Henry vs. Cena next week. Here’s Punk for the contract signing. Punk pulls the table back to him and says this is the biggest WWE staple cliché there is. They always end in a brawl (which he’d love to have trending on Twitter) and since there’s no such thing as creativity by Ace, he figured we’d have the first peaceful one of these since Mania III.

Punk tells Ace to play Jack Tunney so we can sign this and get to brawling. Ace makes it a TLC match at the PPV and Punk is cool with that. Punk runs both guys down and Miz says that he took Truth and Morrison out. Punk: “Like on a date? I bet it was to that new Twilight movie. NOT THAT THERE’S ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT!” Funnier in delivery. Ace looks right at the camera and wishes Morrison the best in his future endeavors.

Miz says he’s a must see start, Punk says he doesn’t care. He’s not about TMZ but about being the best wrestler in the world. Alberto jumps in and says they’re crying too much. He says his usual stuff and Punk cuts him off, saying if Del Rio talks about destiny again then he’ll start drinking. Del Rio says just sign it and Punk wants to know if they can fight after that. Punk signs and I must have missed the heels signing.

Ace wishes them all luck and asks a WWE.com photographer in for a photo op. Punk: “EVEN YOUR CONTRACT SIGNINGS ARE BORING!” With that he blasts Miz and the brawl finally gets going. Ricardo is loaded into the GTS so Del Rio hits Punk low. Del Rio stops to move furniture around but Miz runs in and tries the Finale on Del Rio. Punk breaks that up and hits the bulldog out of the corner to Del Rio through the table. A GTS to Miz and Punk stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. I liked the show tonight as it advanced the two title matches for the PPV. That really needed to happen and they got it done which is really all you can ask for from a show. The wrestling was kind of weak but they certainly pushed stuff tonight and the storylines are a bit more interesting now. Good stuff for the second week in a row from Raw. When’s the last time you heard that?

Results
The Miz b. Randy Orton via countout
Alberto Del Rio b. Daniel Bryan – Cross Armbreaker
Kelly Kelly/Eve Torres b. Natalya/Beth Phoenix
John Cena b. Zack Ryder – AA
Zack Ryder b. Mark Henry – Pin after an AA from John Cena
Kevin Nash b. Santino Marella – Jackknife Powerbomb
Sheamus b. Dolph Ziggler – Brogue Kick

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Monday Night Raw
Date: November 28, 2011
Location: Colonial Life Arena, Columbia, South Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Things are a little bit different tonight and I’m not sure where they’re going to go tonight. Truth has been wellnessed away for the next month so I’m not sure what Miz is going to do. The main event tonight is Alberto vs. CM II so maybe we’re going to get Miz vs. Punk next? It’ll be nice to get through Del Rio’s title push though as he’s not interesting at all as the champion, given how much they’ve crippled him over the last five months. Let’s get to it.

Theme song opens us up.

We open things up with Piper’s Pit. He talks about how the fans have made him what he is today with their energy and all that jazz. Piper was never the biggest, the strongest, the best etc, but the fans made him what he was with their energy. Tonight his guest is someone who doesn’t care as much about the fans’ energy: John Cena.

Cena isn’t sure what he means about the fans not mattering to him. The Hot Scot plays a word association game with the fans where he says a legend’s name and the fans cheer for him. Then he says Cena….and the fans cheer for him. Cena says that’s the fans’ choice and that’s fine. Piper keeps trying to force this because Cena has to tell the fans what he thinks of them instead of just taking it because if he doesn’t, he’ll lose at Mania.

Cena says you’re going overboard with this. He talks about all of the big shows and matches he’s been on where he was booed out of the building, like Mania 22 and MITB and the TLC match in Toronto and One Night Stand (no opponent listed) which made MITB look like a bunch of schoolgirls. Cena says MSG was just New Yorkers being New Yorkers. Piper keeps pushing it and Cena points to some kids in the front row in his gear, saying that they’re having the time of their lives. He had three Make-A-Wish meetings today and they’re all here.

He tells Piper to read his shirt (Rise Above Hate) and says that’s why he’s going to be ok at Mania because he’s going to be himself as he’s always been, even with the fans booing. Piper talks about how his generation gave the torch to Cena’s generation and Cena’s generation raised it. However, that isn’t going to be enough because Piper says Cena is going to be in denial and hands him the Hall of Fame ring. Cena says he’s in a good place so Piper slaps him. Cena walks off and is mad. That came off as forced for the most part, because Cena was rational about the whole thing.

John Morrison vs. The Miz

This is falls count anywhere. Miz comes out with a ball bat or a pipe or something and jumps Morrison with it during Morrison’s entrance. He hits Morrison’s leg with it about 15 times and Morrison is down. I guess this is how Morrison leaves us. Morrison is being carried out but says he’s going back. He hobbles to the ring and they ring the bell. Morrison takes him down but Miz gets a shot in to the knee and wraps it around the post. R-Truth will be out a few weeks according to Cole.

Miz pulls out a kendo stick for a shot to the knee but somehow Morrison fires off a clothesline. Morrison picks up the stick and wears Miz out with it as they head to the floor. Miz tries to crawl up the ramp and Morrison uses the cane for a cane. That’s smart. Miz sends him face first into the big WWE logo though and Morrison is down. There’s the Skull Crushing Finale on the stage and the referee calls the match off at 3:24 with Morrison out cold.

Rating: C+. I enjoyed this one as Miz looked like a killer out there. His in ring stuff has always been the weakest part of his game so keeping him like a killer like this on his own is the right thing to do. I liked the match too as the history and emotion in it carried it to a better match than it should have been. Also this is a better and more definitive way to send Morrison off as it lets Miz get a push too. Good stuff.

Morrison goes out on a stretcher as Miz has a mic in the ring. He says this week it was John Morrison, last week it was R-Truth and next week, who knows? He’s the only superstar that can make this kind of impact. His face is completely stoic as he says this. Miz says he can do this because he’s awesome. I’m digging this.

Alicia Fox/Kelly Kelly vs. Bella Twins

They do the whole second coming thing on the Twitter graphic here. Beth and Nattie come out to th ringside and job around the ring. Then they leave. Ok then. Everything breaks down and Alicia gets a legdrop on a Bella for the pin at 1:45.

Video on Sheamus being all awesome.

Johnny Ace is on the phone and you guessed it: Brodus debuts NEXT week. Otunga comes in and wants to know why Ace is holding off Brodus’ debut for so long because he’s going to be mad. Ace says it’s to make Brodus mad. Alberto comes in and says he’s ready. Ace is worried about sponsors with Punk as champion. Speaking of the champion, he comes in and calls Ace spineless, Del Rio boring, and Otunga something about Jennifer Hudson. Punk leaves and it’s announced that if Punk gets intentionally disqualified, he loses the title.

Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler

Barrett is on commentary. An inset Ziggler interview says he’ll win and show off. These two almost always have good chemistry so the match should be good. Ziggler grabs a quick rollup for two but Randy drills him with a clothesline to send him outside. Orton stomps away and Cole says vintage. He’s a lot less annoying tonight. Ziggler pounds him down and takes over as we head to the floor.

We get our first (I think) Twitter Trending line of the night and King talks about the WWE Social thing. Ziggler goes up but gets caught in a superplex from the top. That gets two and we take a break. Back with Orton hammering away and there’s the elevated DDT. He loads up the RKO so Ziggler RUNS, like an intelligent guy. Barrett gets up on the apron and Orton dropkicks him down, allowing Ziggler to run in with the Zig Zag AND HE GETS THE PIN AT 11:43!!! It’s about time!

Rating: B. Fun match but most important of all: ORTON JOBBED (ALMOST) CLEAN!!! Guys like him and Cena don’t need to win every time and having Orton put over Ziggler is great. It makes Ziggler look legit and it furthers Orton vs. Barrett. Good stuff here as was expected with this match. Ziggler could be HUGE is pushed right.

Ziggler does a handstand post match which is hilarious.

Here’s Daniel Bryan in the ring with Cole. Bryan says he earned the spot in the title match tomorrow while Cole calls Bryan a hypocrite. Bryan calls Cole the worst announcer in WWE. Cole brings up Bryan promising to cash in at Mania and then trying to do it early. We look at the video from Smackdown where Bryan tried to cash in and laughed in Cole’s face about it. Cole says he would have suspended Bryan for conduct unbecoming of a WWE Superstar. Bryan says the case guarantees him nothing so he took the opportunity he had. Tomorrow he has another opportunity in a cage with Henry.

Here’s the champ, limping but off crutches. Henry says he’s injured and isn’t completely ready to compete, which is Teddy Long’s fault. Bryan comes up the ramp with the case and says he can beat him. Bryan kicks him in the leg and says we’ll see tomorrow night. Henry is limping it off.

Zack Ryder vs. Jack Swagger

Ryder needs a clean win so that’s fine. Ryder tries to speed things up but walks into a belly to belly for two. Swagger beates him down for awhile but Ryder grabs a neckbreaker for two. Powerbomb is blocked and Ryder goes up. He jumps into a backbreaker and there’s the Vader Bomb but Swagger trips on Ryder’s body. The second attempt hits feet and the Rough Ryder ends this clean at 3:23.

Rating: C. This is the kind of win he needs: he got a clean win over a guy who isn’t going to be hurt by a loss at all. Ryder needs to win the US Title soon though, hopefully at the PPV. Still though, not much of a match, but I can’t complain as it gets the popular guy on TV and gets him a win. What more can you ask for?

Kane is still coming back with the mask.

We go back to earlier in the night and Piper’s Pit.

Here’s Santa Foley to plug Smackdown tomorrow. He gives us a poem and gets a cheap pop.

Punk swears a bit.

Raw World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. CM Punk

Del Rio goes for the arm immediately so Punk fires off a monkey flip. Alberto takes him down again and fish hooks the mouth a bit because he’s that evil. Out to the floor where Punk hits a suicide dive to take over and we take a break. Back with Del Rio working on the arm again as you would expect him to do. Alberto goes up and hits kind of a shoulder block off the top to the arm for two.

Punk tries a top rope cross body but lands on the arm again. This is a pretty uninteresting match so far. Even Lawler points out how dead the crowd is. Backbreaker gets two for Alberto and he works on the arm again. A top rope double axe gets two. The fans want ice cream because they’re annoying. A big boot puts Punk down but the third attempt at coming off the top fails for Del Rio as he jumps into a kick for two.

The trade strikes and Punk starts his comeback with a neckbreaker for two. Punk sells the arm and hits the knee in the corner but the bulldog is countered into a Codebreaker to the arm for two. The Mexican hits a German to the American for two. GTS is countered into a DDT for two. Del Rio goes for the turnbuckle and the distraction lets Ricardo throw in a chair. Del Rio throws it to him and starts to fall but Punk throws it back first and falls himself. FREAKING BRILLIANT!!! The referee goes to DQ Del Rio but Punk rolls him up for a VERY close two. They actually take the buckle off this time and a GTS onto it ends this at 15:26.

Rating: C+. The match itself was pretty boring, but the ending to it was absolutely brilliant. There was some solid psychology here and everything worked well I think. Also, thank goodness Del Rio loses and we can hopefully move on to something else now instead of his stupid destiny nonsense. Boring match, very hot ending.

Ricardo takes a GTS post match.

Overall Rating: A-. I was DIGGING this show almost all night. Cole toned it way down tonight and it made the show a lot more bearable. They kept things fast paced tonight and instead of focusing on a single story all night, they fired a bunch of stuff at us but most of it was solid stuff. When you have a lot of stuff going on and almost all of it is good, there isn’t much complaining to be found. Great show.

Results
The Miz b. John Morrison via referee stoppage
Alicia Fox/Kelly Kelly b. Bella Twins – Legdrop to Brie Bella
Dolph Ziggler b. Randy Orton – Zig Zag
Zack Ryder b. Jack Swagger – Rough Ryder
CM Punk b. Alberto Del Rio – GTS onto the turnbuckle

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Monday Night Raw
Date: November 21, 2011
Location: Giant Center, Hershey, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T
Guest Host: Jonah Hill

We’re past Survivor Series and it’s officially the road to Mania. The next PPV is TLC and I think that’s 4 weeks away. Rock/Cena won, which means absolutely nothing but Rock did look awesome in the ring so I guess there’s that. Also we have the title on Punk which should at least be more entertaining. There’s a guest host here tonight I think. Let’s get to it.

Theme song opens us up. It sounds like they’re saying Woo Woo Woo during the transtional parts.

Punk opens the arena part of the show and he gets a nice pop. Good to see that he can get those when he’s not with Cena. He talks about being in first grade and having his teacher asking him what they wanted to do. Various people said stuff like a police officer, fireman, etc. He of course wanted to be a professional wrestler, and here he is: the guy that won the WWE Title in Madison Square Garden last night.

He did this on his own terms and this is all he ever wanted to do. Now he wants to be the bringer of change. Punk sits down in the ring and talks about the ice cream bars. Now he wants to get rid of Johnny Ace, which draws out the skateboard man himself. Ace says nothing of note so let’s get back to Punk talking. Punk talks about how greedy Vince is while Ace is the stereotypical middle man, like the guy from Office Space.

Punk criticizes the term WWE Universe. They’re FANS. PREACH IT BROTHER MAN!!!! Next week it’s Del Rio vs. Punk for the title. Punk makes fun of him for that so it’s Ziggler vs. Punk tonight. Punk: “That’s not a good idea or innovative. That’s stupid.” The fans want to see Ziggler vs. Zack Ryder. Ryder is busy tonight vs. Del Rio. Punk starts walking up the ramp towards Ace and some day he’s coming for Ace himself.

Last night after the PPV went off the air, the fans chanted for Ryder while Rock was in the ring. Think about that: the Rock is in the ring in MADISON SQUARE GARDEN and the fans want Zack Ryder. Rock said he was a fan. Sweet goodness man. PUSH THE GUY ALREADY!

Alberto Del Rio vs. Zack Ryder

Ryder breaks up the intro by Ricardo. I don’t get the point of the booking here. Think about it: Del Rio is #1 contender and Ryder is over like free beer. Why do we need to have this match? One has to lose and Ryder needs to get a win here but Del Rio is already on a losing streak. Why not someone like Morrison here? Instead they’ve come up with the booking already and screw the fans and what they want. And they wonder why their numbers are falling through the floor. Ryder starts his comeback but is sent into the buckle and the armbreaks officially squashes him at 2:26. I hate this company at times. I do.

Sheamus vs. Jack Swagger

Jack tries amateur stuff but Sheamus easily powers him to the floor where Swagger is frustrated. From what I’ve been told, the Twitter thing flashed static and the words “It Begins” was in there instead. Interesting. Swagger takes over with the Vader Bomb and we go to the back for a double armbar. Sheamus starts his comeback but the shoulder off the top misses. Brogue Kick is countered into the ankle lock which is kicked off and the kick ends this at 4:35.

Rating: C. Not a terrible match but it was a nice win for old pasty. Swagger is the walking definition of jobber to the stars at this point and that’s a good role for him since they’re not going to give the guy a new gimmick and the All American thing is done as done can be, so having guys beat him like this is fine.

Nash is up next.

Nash comes out and talks about MSG and how important it is here. He talks about the Curtain Call (look it up) and how HHH should have come back and it should have been them in the main event. But instead the Cerebral Assassin is gone at the hands of Nash. He says he’s the survivor of the group.

Here’s Cody, who says he’s unbeatable and he’s unrepentent. This brings out….oh give me a break it brings out Santino.

Santino Marella vs. Cody Rhodes

The Canaditalian avoids the Russian from the American but there’s the Cross Rhodes for the pin at 1:03.

Post match Cody goes after Booker, yelling about various stuff. I’ve heard this was the feud for the next few weeks so here we are. Booker gets water thrown thrown in his face and Cody walks out.

Ziggy is in the back and says he won two matches (he was eliminated but he was still on the winning team) and was the only one that did so. He’s the new face of WWE and will prove it to Punk next.

Dolph Ziggler vs. CM Punk

They head to the mat to start and there isn’t much to say so far. Ziggler beats him down for a good while and this is getting a solid amount of time given how slow they’re going. Punk tries a sleeper but Dolph takes over again. Booker calls him the Zig Zag man to get on my nerves. Ziggler keeps the advantage as we go to a break.

Back with Ziggy still in control but Punk fights back. Into the GTS attempt but it’s countered into the sleeper. Again it’s the Zig Zag Man line from Booker to get on my nerves again. That doesn’t work since Punk is a face and here’s comeback #2. He sets for the Macho elbow but Ziggy grows a brain and MOVES OUT OF THE WAY BEFORE PUNK JUMPS. Why is that so complex?

Dolph kicks his freaking head off with a slick dropkick and they go up. Punk knocks him down and there’s the elbow. It only gets two because it’s a middle of the match move. There needs to be more pins off non-finishers. GTS is countered into another throwing kind of move for a close two. Zig Zag is countered into the GTS for the pin at 16:30.

Rating: C+. Not bad here but I didn’t get into it like I did with Cena and Ziggler or Orton and Ziggler. Punk gets a good win here but he’s right: this wasn’t interesting or innovative, but it’s all we’re getting tonight because this could be interesting and not involve Rock, and since we want Punk to not have much to work with, we’re stuck with this. Decent match though.

Here’s Show to talk about Henry. Henry is coming back, Show still wants to fight him, same old same Show.

The Divas do the same stuff but it’s about WWE 12 this time. Next.

Kane return promo. The mask is included for no apparent reason.

Wade Barrett vs. Kofi Kingston

Barrett says the next thing in his sights is the world title. Barrett beats him down for awhile but as he loads up Wasteland, here’s Orton for the distraction. Wade freaks and drops Kofi. He manages to bail before the Trouble in Paradise as we go to a break. Back with Kofi in a chinlock as Randy is sitting at ringside. I like how they’re actually setting up Orton as a natural progression of a story instead of just rushing it.

Boss Man Slam (BIG one too) puts Kofi down down for two. Barrett pounds him down and hooks his bow and arrow hold. This is a pretty uninteresting match. Oh and I forgot to mention: Lawler has a bad voice due to last night so he can barely talk. Out to the floor and Kofi hits a huge dive to take over. Boom Drop hits but a corner splash misses. Kofi loads up the springboard cross body but Wade kicks the rope and Wasteland ends this clean at 11:34.

Rating: C+. Better match than I expected here and it’s awesome to see Barrett getting such a strong push. Also having Orton set up as Barrett’s next feud is a good thing and hopefully we see Barrett get the pin at the PPV, which is a feud win that he needs. Good stuff here but Kofi having a chance would have helped. Not their fault though.

Barrett announces himself as the winner to rub it in on Orton, who teases an attack but declines.

Here’s Cena for the ending segment. The people boo as you would expect. He talks about how a lot has changed in the last 24 hours (Ryder Twitter plug), including us having proof that he and Rock can team up. The fans chant Fruity Pebbles after they get a mention here. Also last night Rock proved that he’s still got it, which means Mania will be exactly what it should be.

This brings out Awesome Truth with Miz talking about how the fans didn’t want to see Cena last night. Truth says Cena is in his own world and Mania will be awful for him. Cena cuts them off and says we learned that Rock still has it and that no one cares about Awesome Truth at all. Cena tries to put some tension between Awesome Truth and neither of them are too happy with it.

Cena leaves and says they should be booing themselves. They get in each others’ faces and argue, resulting in a shove by Miz and a punch by Truth. Miz begs off and says let’s go get Cena, then jumps Truth as they head up the ramp. A Finale on the ramp (head didn’t hit) ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. I wasn’t feeling this show for the most part. The wrestling wasn’t bad but other than the main stuff, the rest was just there. It felt far more like a commercial for WWE 12 but that’s just a one night thing I believe since it comes out tomorrow. It wasn’t a bad show, but I have no idea what’s coming next and I don’t really see myself caring, which is a bad thing.

Results
Alberto Del Rio b. Zack Ryder – Cross Armbreaker
Sheamus b. Jack Swagger – Brogue Kick
Cody Rhodes b. Santino Marella – Cross Rhodes
CM Punk b. Dolph Ziggler – GTS
Wade Barrett b. Kofi Kingston – Wasteland

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