Monday Night Raw – December 18, 1995: The Tennessee Invasion

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 18, 1995
Location: Bob Carpenter Center, Newark, Delaware
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

We’re FINALLY past the nightmare that was the December taping cycle and In Your House V. Bret Hart retained the WWF World Title (shocking I know) and Undertaker beat Mabel in the casket match (shocking again) and that’s about it for anything of note from that pay per view. Tonight we have Razor Ramon vs. Yokozuna for Razor’s Intercontinental Title. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last night, including Diesel and Undertaker staring each other down to plant seeds for Wrestlemania.

Opening sequence.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Fatu

This is Jarrett’s return after a long absence. Fatu dances a lot and makes a difference by atomic dropping Jarrett out to the floor. Back in and a shot to the head has no effect on Fatu but Jeff sends him throat first into the ropes for the running crotch attack to the back of the head. Jarrett rams him into the steps and actually has some success as we go to a break. Jeff slowly beats on Fatu but dives into a punch to the ribs. Fatu hits a powerslam and corner clothesline for two until he crashes down and holds his shoulder. It’s time for the Figure Four but Ahmed Johnson comes in to jump Jarrett for the DQ.

Rating: D. It’s not a good sign when Jeff Jarrett’s big return match is put in the perfect kind of spot for him and the match wound up being this bad. Jarrett just isn’t interesting in the ring and he’s not interesting on the mic either. Other than that he’s just fine though. That ending seemed to be improvised though as Fatu looked hurt off the crash landing.

Ahmed beats Jarrett up and helps Fatu to the back.

Gorilla Monsoon says Diesel can get over Undertaker being named #1 contender. As for the Royal Rumble, Jeff Jarrett won’t be in the Rumble itself because he’ll be facing Ahmed Johnson.

The graphic for Razor vs. Yokozuna is really weird as Razor is in the middle and Yokozuna is off to the side with most of his left arm cut off.

Goldust wants to sleep with Razor Ramon.

We see a clip from last night with Diesel getting in Undertaker’s face about Undertaker being #1 contender.

Buddy Landel vs. Bob Holly

Landel is a Ric Flair knockoff/ripoff/tribute character and even had Flair’s 1992 theme music here. Holly armdrags him down to start but Landel takes it back to 1985 with every Flair move you can think of, even down to his mannerisms. Buddy keeps it on the mat and starts working on the leg before getting two off a backdrop. We FINALLY get to the comeback with Holly hitting right hands and a clothesline but he misses a dropkick, allowing Buddy to drop a jumping elbow for the pin.

Rating: F. I sat through almost seven minutes of these two boring the fans to death and the best I can get is an ELBOW DROP? They had no idea what to do to counter Nitro at this point and if the best they can do is back to back old school Tennessee style matches like they’ve spent the first half of this show airing, they deserve to get squashed.

To make it even better, it’s the Brother Love Show with Ted DiBiase. The topic tonight: DiBiase having his answer to Santa Claus with Xanta Klaus, who lives at the South Pole and steals presents from kids. Now he’s going to steal victory after victory (oh dear) because 1996 is going to be the year of the Million Dollar Team and the Million Dollar Champion.

Raw Bowl ad. Did they really think this was some brilliant idea?

Intercontinental Title: Razor Ramon vs. Yokozuna

Razor is defending and here’s Goldust to watch from ringside. The champ quickly knocks Yokozuna out to the floor to start and we look at Goldust during the lull. Back in and Razor hammers away with everything he’s got before having to avoid a sitdown splash. Yokozuna takes him down with ease and grabs the nerve hold because he already needs a break.

Razor gets up because it’s just a fat man nerve hold and hits some clotheslines. Back from a break with Razor having to fight out of another nerve hold. Razor fights up, stops a charge in the corner and hits the middle rope bulldog……as Undertaker comes out with a casket. Yokozuna panics and runs away because THESE TWO HAVE TO FEUD FOREVER.

Rating: D. Match of the night here until the horrible ending. Was anyone asking for another casket match between Undertaker and Yokozuna? Like, wasn’t the Undertaker’s spirit rising out of the casket and then Chuck Norris enough for us? Thankfully this didn’t go anywhere of note and Undertaker would move on to the main event and then his much better feuds in 1996.

Razor is actually flattered that Goldust likes him but he’s just into women.

And to wrap it up, Tell Me A Lie, a video tribute to Shawn Michaels who might never return.

Overall Rating: F. That might be the worst episode of Raw that I’ve ever seen. The first half of the show is spent on Jeff Jarrett and Buddy Landel, neither of whom could keep the fans awake let alone interested. After that we have an Intercontinental Title match with Razor bouncing off Yokozuna before Undertaker comes out for really not much of a reason.

I mean, there was the face crushing last month but Undertaker is getting a title shot at the Royal Rumble and is pretty clearly about to fight Diesel soon after that. Why do I need to see him with Yokozuna? Absolutely horrible show here with almost no effort, nothing interesting, and now I have Tell Me A Lie stuck in my head. Thanks Raw, for irritating me this badly.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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In Your House V: Seasons Beatings (2013 Redo): It Wasn’t THAT Bad

In Your House #5: Seasons Beatings
Date: December 17, 1995
Location: Hersheypark Arena, Hershey, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 7,289
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

In addition to the main event of British Bulldog challenging Bret Hart for the WWF World Title, this is the first In Your House to feature the Undertaker on the pay per view (he had wrestled in several post PPV dark matches already). It’s rather interesting that one of the biggest and certainly most unique stars in the company hadn’t appeared in the first four editions of a PPV series and I’m not sure why he hadn’t. Anyway tonight he faces King Mabel in his signature match: the casket match. Let’s get to it.

The opening video starts with various symbols of Christmas before transitioning to shots of the Hart Family splitting apart as well as the Bulldog pinning Bret Hart at Summerslam 1992 in a masterpiece.

Santa Claus is here handing out presents.

Jerry Lawler promises us a big surprise.

Razor Ramon/Marty Jannetty vs. Sycho Sid/1-2-3 Kid

The Kid is full heel now and a part of the Million Dollar Team. Goldust rubs his chest while watching Razor come to the ring. Marty and the Kid start things off with Jannetty scoring with an enziguri for two. Some shoulder blocks and a clothesline get the same on the Kid and Marty goes over for the tag, freaking the Kid out. An atomic drop has Kid in trouble and now it’s off to Razor for the showdown. The Kid bails to the floor for a second but gets a toothpick in his face back inside.

Razor is having a good time but a blind tag brings in Sid to take over for the Million Dollar Team. Back to the Kid for a kick to the face but Razor glares at him after some chops. Sid comes back in to pound Ramon down and get cheered by the crowd in a surprising reaction. Razor comes back with some right hands and a double clothesline puts both guys down. A double tag brings in Marty to run over the Kid again and a powerslam is good for two.

A front flip facebuster out of the corner gets two on the Kid and it’s off to a camel clutch of all things. We go to Todd Petingill in the crowd with Goldust who quotes movie lines and expresses his lust for Ramon. This goes on for several minutes but at least we’re on split screen. Goldust asks Todd to give Razor a letter. Back to the match and Marty punches his way out of the corner but his cross body is caught in a powerslam for two.

Back to the Kid for a bad looking slam and a better looking guillotine legdrop for two before it’s back to Sid. Ramon gets suckered into the ring but gets in a right hand to the Kid. Marty is turned inside out by a clothesline and it’s off to a chinlock. Kid comes back in to drop a leg and then bring Sid back inside for some shots to the back.

It’s the Kid in again but he misses a charge in the corner, allowing for the tag off to Razor as things speed up. The fallaway slam puts Kid on the floor but Sid breaks up the Razor’s Edge. Not that it matters as Razor hits a quick middle rope bulldog (his finisher before he was in the WWF) for the pin.

Rating: D+. Not a terrible match but it went on too long for what they were going for. Jannetty was an odd choice as Razor’s partner against DiBiase’s boys as he was basically fighting everyone himself, but it was all about the him vs. the Kid anyway. Nothing much to see here and not the best choice for an opening match.

Here’s Jerry Lawler in the ring with a present for the returning Jeff Jarrett. After sucking up to Jeff for awhile, the present is opened to reveal a gold record of Ain’t I Great, Jeff’s single from six months earlier. Jarrett brags about how great he is and it doesn’t make anything more interesting. The only thing of note is he enters himself in the Royal Rumble.

Dean Douglas vs. Ahmed Johnson

Douglas says he has a back injury and can’t wrestle, so here’s his prized student Buddy Landell.

Buddy Landell vs. Ahmed Johnson

This is actually a joke, as Buddy Landell is a Ric Flair ripoff and comes to the ring to Flair’s WWF music in a Flair style robe. Douglas hates Flair in real life (never mentioned here of course), so it’s supposed to be funny that Douglas is Flair’s teacher or something like that. Not that it matters as Ahmed, a muscular monster with one of the most intimidating looks ever, destroys Landell and beats him with a Pearl River Plunge (double underhook powerbomb) in 32 seconds.

Post match Johnson paddles Douglas with the Board of Education. This would be Douglas’ last appearance. Lawler interviews Johnson and calls him stupid, allowing Jarrett to break the gold record over Johnson’s head. Jeff also gets in a few chair shots and rams Ahmed into the steps a couple of times, but Ahmed no sells them and chases Jarrett off.

Todd gives Razor the letter from Goldust and Ramon is disgusted, because it’s 1995 and anyone gay has to be a heel right?

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Henry Godwinn

This is a hogpen match, meaning there’s an actual hog pen with pigs and mud near the entrance and the winner is the first man to send his opponent into said pin. Why is this match happening you ask? Simply put it’s because Godwinn is a hog farmer so he associates with hogs. One note characters like him had a lot to do with the downfall of the WWF at this point, as there’s no interest to such characters, meaning there’s no reason to stick around and watch them. The guest referee is 1980s crowd favorite Hillbilly Jim.

Godwinn slops the ring announcer before the match starts for no apparent reason. Helmsley jumps Godwinn but is quickly sent to the floor for his efforts. Back in and Henry ties him in the ropes so he can rub more slop in Helmsley’s face. After nearly retching, Helmsley takes it back to the floor, only to be bulldogged face first into the steps.

They head up the pen with Henry being whipped into the gate but still managing to block a Pedigree attempt with a backdrop. Helmsley lands on the edge of the pen and kicks Henry down before dropping an elbow to the chest. Lawler makes Jeff Foxworthy style jokes about being from Arkansas as they head back inside where Godwinn hits a big wheelbarrow slam. Helmsley is whipped to two corners and out to the floor for another handful of slop. Henry hits the Slop Drop up by the pen but can’t follow up. Instead he charges at Helmsley and gets backdropped into the slop to end things.

Rating: C-. This actually wasn’t that bad as it was a regular match until the ending. Again though, why am I supposed to care? It’s the lowest level of comedy and storytelling possible, which doesn’t mean it’s necessarily bad, but we have no reason to care about either of these guys so why should I be interested in the match?

Post match Henry slams Helmsley into the pen for fun. That’s a nice idea as at least the fans get the (limited) payoff.

We recap Diesel’s change of attitude since he lost the world title at Survivor Series, which has seen him act much more aggressive. This was what he should have been doing as champion.

Diesel vs. Owen Hart

This is a revenge match for Diesel as Owen kicked Shawn Michaels in the head and put him on the shelf as a result. Diesel launches Owen into the corner to start and hits a big side slam for no cover. The arena is full of smoke from Diesel’s entrance. Owen comes back with some right hands but Diesel easily throws him to the outside for a meeting with Cornette.

Back in and Owen scores with a missile dropkick before going after Diesel’s knee to take him down. A spinwheel kick gets two on Diesel but he easily kicks Hart away to break up a spinning toe hold. Diesel comes back with a big boot and the Jackknife (“This is for you Shawn!”) but he takes his foot off Owen’s chest at two. The referee begs him to let it end so Diesel shoves him down for the DQ.

Rating: D+. The match was going along pretty well until the stupid ending. I understand that they’re trying to push Diesel as being more aggressive, but having him lose isn’t the way to go about doing that. This is Diesel’s third straight PPV loss which doesn’t make me think he’s a monster but rather a guy who can’t finish his opponents.

Here are Savio Vega and Santa Claus to hand out presents to the fans, but Ted DiBiase interrupts them. He says everyone has a price and calls them both into the ring. DiBiase doesn’t believe Santa can make it around the world in one night but he knows someone who can. Savio says he doesn’t have a price and says he believes in Santa.

However, this isn’t the real Santa. It’s really…..XANTA CLAUS, Santa’s evil brother from the south pole who steals presents from children. I wish I was making this up but I promise you it’s real. Xanta lays out Savio and leaves with DiBiase but Savio chases after them, only to get beaten up again. Vince: “SAY IT’S NOT SO!!!” Xanta is played by future ECW mainstay Balls Mahoney.

Mabel says he isn’t scared of the Undertaker, who has returned after having his face crushed by Mabel and Yokozuna. Tonight it’s a casket match, meaning you have to put your opponent in a casket and close the lid to win.

King Mabel vs. Undertaker

Mable now has a very stupid looking mohawk to go with his stupid looking gold and purple pajamas. He jumps Undertaker to start but Undertaker comes back with rights and lefts in the corner. Mabel takes him down with a Boss Man Slam but Undertaker pops right back up. A clothesline gets the same result but a slam keeps Undertaker down for a bit. Mabel goes up for a middle rope splash but Taker moves to avoid probably death. Instead a belly to belly and legdrop keep Undertaker down and there’s a splash for good measure.

Mabel and Sir Mo roll Taker into the casket but don’t shut the lid because they’re not that bright. Undertaker blocks the eventual lid closure as Mabel is dancing in the ring with his crown. Back in and Taker pounds away before kicking Mabel into the casket. Mo’s save is easily thwarted with a chokeslam and he gets thrown in as well. Undertaker takes back the necklace made from the Urn (don’t ask) and slams the lid shut for the win.

Rating: D+. This was about as perfect as you could get to end the Undertaker vs. Mabel feud but it doesn’t help that we had to sit through it for so many months. Thankfully Mabel was gone soon after this with his last notable appearance coming in January. Undertaker is a good force to have back in the company as he was probably the third most popular guy in the company at this point.

Post match Undertaker motions that he wants the WWF Title.

Jim Cornette walks us through Bret’s history with the Bulldog, who is married to Bret’s sister. Unlike in 1992 where the sister Diana was split on who to cheer for, she’s firmly in her husband’s corner tonight.

Bret says he’s making up for 1992 tonight.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. British Bulldog

The much stronger Bulldog shoves the champion into the corner to start but Bret grabs an armbar to take over. Davey flips around a lot but ultimately takes Bret down by the hair like a true villain should. Back to the armbar by Bret as we take a look at Cornette’s tennis racket cover which looks like Santa Claus’ face. Bret gets two off a cross body and goes right back to the arm. Smith comes back with another hair pull before tying Bret up in the Tree of Woe (hanging him upside down in the corner) to stomp away.

Off to the chinlock as the fans are solidly behind Bret. They soon get bored of cheering for him though and start chanting for the then upstart promotion ECW. Vince informs us that the Undertaker has challenged the winner of this match for the Royal Rumble. After a Cornette tennis racket shot we’re in the third chinlock less than ten minutes into the match before the required chest first bump into the buckle gets two on Hart.

A backdrop puts Bret down for two more and we hit the chinlock again. At least this time he makes it a headlock as the fans chant USA, in theory for the Canadian champion. Bret comes back with a monkey flip and a bulldog to the Bulldog for two. A piledriver lays Smith out for two more but Bulldog crotches Bret on the ropes to break up a superplex. Bret falls to the floor and the fans want a table. Instead they get the champion being sent into the steps as Bulldog is in control.

Smith sends him hard into the barricade and Bret is busted wide open. Back in and Bulldog piledrives Bret down for a near fall before pounding at the cut on the forehead. The delayed vertical suplex gets the same and there’s a gorilla press slam for good measure. Bulldog channels his former partner the Dynamite Kid with a headbutt to the back for two. Smith seems to have hurt his knee though so Bret tries a quick Sharpshooter, only to have Smith break it up just as easily.

A hard shoulder puts Bret onto the floor so Smith can try to get some feeling back into his knee. Bret counters a suplex back inside into a rollup for yet another near fall before a double clothesline puts both guys down. They’re quickly back up and a backdrop puts Smith on the floor. Bret is ticked off now and dives over the top to pound away on Smith even more. Davey will have none of that though and powerslams Bret down on the floor to suck the life out of the crowd.

The protective mats are peeled back but Bret blocks a suplex by crotching Davey on the barricade in a nice callback to earlier in the match. Bret clotheslines him off the barricade and heads back inside where a backbreaker gets two. Now the superplex connects for two and an O’Connor Roll gets the same. In a really sudden finish, Bulldog charges into a boot in the corner and Bret cradles him for the pin. The look on Diana’s face makes the ending even better as it almost says “HOW DARE YOU KEEP THE TITLE!”

Rating: B-. This got WAY better in the end but the first ten minutes or so of this were pretty dreadful. Also the ending didn’t do it any favors as I was expecting a callback to the Summerslam 1992 match but we didn’t get anything close to it. Still though, good match and by far the best thing we’ve had on one of these shows in the last two shows.

Paul Bearer (Undertaker’s odd manager) and Undertaker are pleased that they get a title shot at the Royal Rumble. Diesel comes in and says it’s his shot. The giants stare each other down to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. While this isn’t a good show, it’s WAY better than the previous two entries in the series. Bret is just better as champion as he can work with almost any style and get a better match out of most people. The rest of the card was pretty horrible, but things would be changing quickly around here which is the best thing that could have happened for the WWF.

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Monday Night Raw – December 4, 1995: Sign The Doctor

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 4, 1995
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Attendance: 4,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

We’re back to the same typing cycle thanks to the powers of a random number generator. In case you missed the last batch of shows, we’re coming up on In Your House V with new WWF World Champion Bret Hart defending against the British Bulldog. On top of that Shawn Michaels is out of action indefinitely with a bad head injury and things aren’t looking good. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at Dean Douglas vs. Razor Ramon and Marty Jannetty vs. Sid, both taking place tonight.

Opening sequence.

Bob Holly vs. British Bulldog

Holly starts fast and slams Bulldog and a dropkick sends him outside in a huff. Back in and Holly cranks on an armbar but Bulldog launches him off with ease. There’s the delayed vertical suplex so Bulldog can call himself the best there is, the best there was and the best there ever will be. Another dropkick gets Holly out of trouble because it’s not like he can do much else. A third dropkick and some right hands stagger Bulldog until he catches Holly on his shoulder for the powerslam and the pin.

Rating: D. Holly threw a great dropkick but he’s a wrestling racecar driver. I’m really not sure who thought this was a good idea, though calling him Sparky didn’t do him any favors. Holly is a good http://your-pharmacies.com hand in the ring and good for something like this but that gimmick was just death and everyone knew it.

We look back at Bob Backlund’s path of rage over the last week.

Lawler asks Backlund about his match against Bret next week, which will be non-title. That’s not cool with Bob and he snaps about not being able to reign over the plebeians. He goes on until we have to go to a break, which Backlund interprets as being finited.

Fatu vs. Brooklyn Brawler

Fatu makes a difference on Brawler’s spine with a backbreaker as Vince shills the WWF Hotline. See, there’s an investment of $1.49 for the first minute. Speaking of a minute, that’s about how long it takes for Fatu to finish Brawler with a top rope splash.

We go to Dok Hendrix for a Slam Jam but have to cut to Backlund beating up the sound guy for sending them to break.

Diesel has accepted Owen Hart’s open contract.

Intercontinental Title: Razor Ramon vs. Dean Douglas

Ramon is defending in Douglas’ rematch after Dean’s fifteen minute reign ended at the last In Your House. Dean jumps him during the entrance, which Vince refers to as using Razor Ramon tactics. Razor catches a cross body in the fall away slam, finally allowing him to take off his vest.

As the champ charges into a boot in the corner, we hear about an interview with Shawn Michael’s personal physician about his head injuries. Ignore the fact that we’ve seen probably half of it in various clips throughout the night. I can’t stand it when they give away the plot in the trailers. A whip sends Razor back first into the buckle and we take a break. Back with Razor caught in an abdominal stretch until he reverses into one of his own. Dean hiptosses his way out but gets caught in the Razor’s Edge for the clean pin moments later.

Rating: D+. Much like Holly, Dean was a good hand in the ring who was ruined by such a horrible gimmick. His talking was far better than his work between the ropes but when you can’t be yourself and have to be a completely new (and not great) character, the whole thing is destined for failure.

It’s the Brother Love Show with guest King Mabel, though Vince talks over Love’s introduction. Love asks about Sir Mo’s whereabouts but Mabel yells at him and promises to bury Undertaker at In Your House. Mabel doesn’t like being questioned but Love has a surprise for him. Cue a hooded man pushing a casket to the ring as Undertaker’s music plays. It turns out to be Mo under the hood and the casket is covered in graffiti. Mabel promises to crush Undertaker to end this very boring segment.

Razor says he’ll have Marty’s back and look out for the Kid.

The Raw Bowl is coming. That show was stupid.

Marty Jannetty vs. Sid

Sid has Ted DiBiase with him. Jannetty is all over him to start and actually gets him on the mat until Sid jumps up (work with me here) for a World’s Strongest Slam. Sid charges into a boot in the corner (the only way to deal with a monster) and a middle rope flipping cutter gets two. We take a break and come back with Sid in full control but Marty breaking out of a chinlock. DiBiase pulls Marty out to the floor and here’s the Kid for the cheap shots. This brings out Razor for the save but he goes after Sid for the DQ.

Rating: D. Marty was trying here but this was just a commercial for the pay per view tag match which means Sid wasn’t going to be trying. Razor vs. Sid would be a better match but Sid and Kid had a weird chemistry and worked as an oddball heel team. Of course it would have been better if Sid threw him around instead of just trudging through the match.

Sid powerbombs Marty post match.

We go to the Chino Medical Center to talk to Shawn’s doctor. Said doctor was very concerned when he saw Shawn collapse in the ring due to post concussion syndrome. It can take years for someone to heal and Shawn could be out significantly longer than expected.

Football players and boxers can never recover from these things and Shawn’s style makes it even worse. We see clips of Shawn’s big impacts and any future blows to the head could be life threatening. He might never get back in the ring again. This guy is either a real doctor or an amazing actor because this sounded as realistic as any such speech I’ve ever seen.

Back to Vince for a voiceover video speech about how awesome these wrestlers are but to remember they’re still humans. Apparently they all push the edge and Shawn has been living there for years.

Overall Rating: D-. Somehow that doctor’s speech was the best part of the show. The company really needs a boost of energy and taking Shawn off the show isn’t going to help things. The major problems here are the lack of interesting stories and characters. There’s MAKING A DIFFERENCE Fatu, the wrestling racecar driver and Marty Jannetty. How strong of a show are you going to have when your alternative is Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage?




Monday Night Raw – November 13, 1995: One Of Those Stupid Calls

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 13, 1995
Location: Keystone Arena, Brandon, Manitoba, Canada
Attendance: 2,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

This is the go home show for Survivor Series and the card really isn’t the most interesting in the world. Bret vs. Diesel should be fun as always but the Survivor Series matches aren’t looking great. It’s just such a bad time for the company and there really isn’t much of a way around that. Let’s get to it.

We open with a look at the 1-2-3 Kid and Razor Ramon getting into a bunch of fights over the weekend. Therefore, Kid will still be guest referee for Razor vs. Sid later tonight but it will now be a non-title match.

Opening sequence.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Henry O. Godwinn

Henry is sent outside so Helmsley can spray his perfume. Godwinn grabs his slop bucket and slops himself, which sends Helmsley running away to end the “match”.

We go to Dok Hendrix for Slam Jam (meaning the Control Center) with a talk about the Wild Card match where no one trusts each other.

Video on Shawn Michaels, who has been having head issues but he’s not quite done yet.

Ahmed Johnson vs. Jake Steele

This is Ahmed’s Raw debut. Steele has a good look but makes the mistake of punching Johnson in the face. We get a quick statement from Shawn Michaels about being happy to team with Ahmed at Survivor Series. A spinebuster sets up the Pearl River Plunge for the quick pin.

Post match Ahmed says something about snapping off a piece of a G on Sunday and you can see Vince wondering how he screwed this one up.

We get a sitdown interview between Diesel and Bret Hart to hype up Sunday. Diesel thinks he’s the best right now while Bret thinks he never should have lost the title in the first place. When they had their match at the Royal Rumble it ended in a DQ and Bret never had a rematch. Bret thinks he was the best challenger Diesel ever had though Diesel seems to think it was Shawn.

For some reason Bret thinks technical wrestlers aren’t getting enough title shots but Diesel points out that he’s defended against Shawn and the Hart brothers. Both guys talk about their strengths as this is clearly just being dragged out to fill time. Bret thinks Diesel is walking around with his title and this FINALLY ends after nearly ten minutes.

And now, Vince McMahon and Jerry Lawler have a Karate Fighters match with Lawler cheating to win.

King Mabel vs. Roy Raymond

The bell rings and we go to comments from Undertaker, who is in shadows to hide whatever his crushed face looks like. Mabel stomps away in the corner and throws Roy around with a suplex. Raymond’s dropkick has almost no effect and the squash is capped off with a belly to belly to give Mabel the pin.

We look back at the 1-2-3 Kid and Razor having issues over the weekend.

Razor Ramon vs. Sid

Non-title but ignore the belt being held in the air before the bell rings. 1-2-3 Kid is guest referee and the fans still love him because this was taped before the heel turn. Sid has Ted DiBiase in his corner as part of the Million Dollar Corporation. A slugout goes to Razor but he eats a big boot to the jaw. We hit a headscissors of all things but Sid nips up (!) and grabs a chokeslam.

That means it’s time for a bunch of stomps instead of a cover, followed by some forearms to the back with Sid yelling at his own forearms. Razor comes back with a failed Razor’s Edge attempt as he’s backdropped to the floor, as is the case way too often. Now it’s Dean Douglas (Razor’s partner in the Wild Card match) coming out and we take a break.

Back with Dean stomping on Razor so Sid can drop him face first onto the apron. We hit one of the lamest chinlocks I’ve ever seen (and I’ve seen Scott Steiner put on a reverse chinlock) but Razor gets underneath for an electric chair drop. Back up and Sid charges into a boot, setting up the middle rope bulldog for two. Razor gets Sid up for the Razor’s Edge but Kid pulls him down to set up the powerbomb with a count so fast I couldn’t even look at the video quickly enough.

Rating: D. Oh man Sid was falling apart at this point. They really had too much stuff going on here with Douglas just not needing to be involved. The Kid ending was as forecast as you could have asked it to be, assuming you weren’t in the arena. I really don’t get the idea of having this be a title change for the live crowd (of course it wouldn’t stand) while saying it was non-title in post production.

So yeah, Kid is Corporation now.

Razor tries to kill Dean to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. Total mess and waste of a show here as they were obviously out of content and trying to fill in the time with whatever they could before getting to the pay per view. The show was nothing short of a disaster though with bad wrestling, squashes and basically talking about three of Sunday’s six matches. Horrible show here and unfortunately that’s far too common in this era.

Here’s Survivor Series if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/11/03/survivor-series-count-up-1995-wild-card/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01IH7O904


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Summerslam Count-Up – 1995: The Low

Summerslam 1995
Date: August 27, 1995
Location: Pittsburgh Civic Center, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 18,062
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Vince McMahon

..no. No please don’t make me do THIS show! I’ll pay you to not make me do this waste of a show. If there’s a bottom of the barrel for Summerslam and perhaps the WWF in general, this is it. The main event tonight is King Mabel vs. WWF Champion Diesel in a match that is the preferred method of torture in 19 countries. There is however one bright spot: Shawn vs. Razor II, again in a ladder match. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is like a trailer for the main event matches on tonight’s show, such as the main event, the ladder match, Bret vs. Lawler’s royal dentist and the FINAL blowoff to Undertaker vs. DiBiase’s Corporation.

Dean Douglas (Shane Douglas as a high school teacher) will be grading tonight’s matches. That’s a brilliant idea. Someone else should watch a lot of matches and grade them in detail.

Hakushi vs. 1-2-3 Kid

The Kid is still a face here and is starting to look someone older. Hakushi is a Japanese guy who is covered in individual characters, even on his face. Feeling out process to start as they fight over a top wristlock. The Kid backflips out of a wristlock and armdrags Hakushi across the ring to take him down. Things speed up with the Kid hip tossing him down but being kicked off by Hakushi into a stalemate. They run the ropes again but both hold a rope and try superkicks but neither can connect.

Hakushi goes to the throat as Vince calls the show SummerSlime. A tilt-a-whirl slam puts the Kid down and Hakushi poses on the ropes for a few long moments. Hakushi hits a Vader Bomb for two and Vince thinks the match should be stopped. The Kid is sent to the floor and Hakushi hits a gorgeous moonsault from the mat to the floor followed by a top rope shoulder block for two back inside. A swan dive misses though and Kid sends him to the floor for a dive of his own. Back in and a slingshot legdrop gets two and a frog splash gets the same. The Kid tries a spin kick but gets caught in a quick powerbomb for the pin.

Rating: C+. Solid opener here with both guys looking good throughout. Hakushi really was something special and the fans would turn him face through pure love of his high flying abilities alone. The Kid would be turning heel soon after this in a move that most people didn’t care about for the most part.

Doc Hendrix (Michael Hayes) is WAY too excited about what Mabel’s master plan is for Diesel. Mabel says we have to wait and does a decent evil laugh.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Bob Holly

This is the future boss’ PPV debut. Helmsley is the stuck up blue blood here so he walks around with his nose in the air. Holly takes him down with some armdrags but gets in a cheap shot to Bob’s head. Holly comes back with some kicks in the corner but runs into a knee to the face to put him down. Helmsley chokes away in the corner before hitting a HARD whip across the corner. A backbreaker gets two and a Flair knee drop gets the same.

We go split screen to see the British Bulldog arriving but he has nothing to say. Helmsley hooks an abdominal stretch but has to hiptoss Holly over the top after he counters. Holly comes back with some dropkicks and some jobber level offense including a backdrop. He tries a second one though and gets caught in a Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: D. Well he had to get better after something like this. HHH didn’t look like anything of note but the Pedigree was a good finisher. It was actually his second finisher as he started with a Diamond Cutter but changed it quickly into his run. Holly would also completely change his character in coming years until it finally clicked with the hardcore character.

We get a video of a charity tug of war between wrestlers and Pittsburgh firefighters. It’s for charity so no jokes here.

Blue Brothers vs. Smoking Gunns

The Brothers are Jacob and Eli but are more famous as the bald Harris Brothers (also known as DOA, Creative Control, the Bruise Brothers and about ten other names over the years). Their manager is Uncle Zebekiah, who is currently (as of July 2013) Zeb Colter in WWE. Jacob elbows Billy down to start before it’s off to Eli for a slam and some elbow drops. Billy gets a quick two count on Jacob before it’s off to Bart for some arm work. Jacob whips Bart into the corner before bringing Eli back in to get caught by a cross body for two.

The Gunns get a near fall off some double teaming but Billy walks into an H Bomb (double powerbomb) to stop the momentum dead. Eli puts Billy in the Tree of Woe but tags in Jacob instead of doing anything about it. Jacob draws in Bart to allow for more double teaming and Eli gets two off a powerslam. Billy comes back with a face plant to Jacob and makes the tag off to Bart. Everything breaks down and the Blus are sent into each other, allowing the Gunns to hit the Sidewinder (side slam/guillotine legdrop) on Eli for the pin.

Rating: D. This wasn’t so much bad as it was completely uninteresting. That’s the problem with so many parts of 1995 WWF: the people just weren’t interesting at all and there was no reason to care about a lot of the matches. All you had here was a midcard tag match that ran about six minutes. It wasn’t any good and there was no story to it, so why was I supposed to care?

We recap the rise of Barry Horowitz. He literally didn’t win a match in years but won a miracle against Skip (Chris Candido) on Action Zone. They went to a ten minute draw a few weeks later and tonight is the final chance for redemption.

Barry Horowitz vs. Skip

Skip has a 22 year old Sunny with him here, putting all the attention on her. Barry has the awesome rock version of Hava Nagila as his theme music. Horowitz starts fast and drops a knee on the fitness guru for two. A knee to the chest puts Skip down and Barry takes down the suspenders. Skip is clotheslined to the floor but Barry pulls him right back in. An O’Connor roll gets two for Barry and he suplexes Skip to the floor. Sunny tries to bring in a towel but gets ejected instead.

She doesn’t leave though and trips Barry up to finally shift momentum. A suplex and a middle rope legdrop get two on Horowitz and the beating continues. Horowitz finally gets up and hits a few shoulder blocks for two but his offense is rather limited. Skip comes back with a clothesline but the fans are chanting for Barry. A powerslam puts Barry down again and some quick legdrops get two for Skip. Off to a chinlock but Barry is quickly up, only to have both guys try dropkicks at once.

Skip is up first and gets a close two off a swan dive. The fans are starting to get behind Horowitz here, but it’s hard to care about a jobber in this big a match. A piledriver is countered and Barry starts his real comeback with a dropkick. He goes up but gets crotched again, allowing Skip to hit a superplex for no cover. Cue Hakushi who Skip cost a win earlier this week to dive over Skip, allowing Barry to roll him up for the pin.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t terribly boring or anything but at the end of the day this was a ten minute match with Barry Horowitz facing Skip at Summerslam. That’s not the easiest thing to get into and is more of an historical anomaly than anything significant at all. Nothing to see here at all other than Sunny.

Dean Douglas calls the last match a travesty.

Shawn says he has nothing but the IC Title so there’s nothing Razor can do to take the title from him.

Women’s Title: Bertha Faye vs. Alundra Blayze

Blayze is defending and Faye is this rather frumpy fat chick designed to be disturbing. She also has Harvey Whippelman with him as her worshiping admirer. Alundra fires off some quickly kicks to start and the 280lb or so Faye runs her over in response. A bad looking hair pull sends Blayze down and some legdrops get two. Bertha misses a middle rope splash and a victory roll gets two for the champion. Three clotheslines get no count for Alundra as Harvey has the referee. Some middle rope dropkicks stagger Bertha but she avoids a third before hitting a Batista Bomb for the title.

Rating: F. See, Faye was fat and that’s the extent of her character. The title would literally be trashed on Nitro in a few months in the right ending for it. Nothing else to say here.

Remember how I said this show sucked? It’s somehow going to get worse.

We recap Undertaker vs. Kama. Kama stole the Urn at Wrestlemania and melted it down into a big chain which ticked off Taker’s Creatures of the Night (goth fans). They brought a black wreath but Kama destroyed both the wreath and the Creature himself. Tonight it’s a casket match.

Taker says Kama went too far.

Undertaker vs. Kama

Kama is more famous as Godfather and is the Supreme Fighting Machine here, which is kind of an MMA gimmick. Taker pounds away in the corner to start before choking Kama down, only to be kicked in the back when he looks at the casket. Taker knocks Kama over the top and onto the casket to freak him out before hitting a quick splash in the corner. Old School connects and Kama is thrown into the casket but pops right back out. A top rope clothesline puts Taker down for a second but he sits right back up.

Kama hits a quick belly to belly suplex but Taker is right back up again. He throws Kama into the casket again but DiBiase makes a quick save. Kama pounds on Taker in the corner and clotheslines him onto the top of the casket where DiBiase can get in some shots. The managers almost get into it but we’re lucky enough to get more of Taker and Kama’s slow brawling. Kama posts him and rams Taker face first into the casket. A suplex onto the casket works over the back a bit but Kame, the genius that he is, can’t open the casket with Undertaker on top of it.

They both stand on the casket and Undertaker backdrops Kama into the ring to block a piledriver. The fans get WAY into this all of a sudden but Kama takes him down with a powerslam. The genius covers Taker but he sits up a few seconds later. Off to a chinlock because this match hasn’t gone on long enough already. Bearer shoves Kama’s feet off the ropes to break up the hold so it’s off to a headlock.

Taker finally fights up but gets whipped into the corner to stop him cold again. The jumping clothesline puts Kama down and a regular clothesline puts him inside the casket, but Undertaker falls in with him and the lid closes. Kama fights out again and hits a neckbreaker in the ring to put the Dead Man down again. Not that it matters as Taker stands up, hits the chokeslam and tombstone and throws Kama into the casket for the win.

Rating: D. WAY too long for the level of “action” in this match. Also did anyone think Kama had a chance against Undertaker in a major match? There was nothing here and the match running seventeen minutes didn’t help it at all. Undertaker would move onto a feud with King Mabel which was at least different than the year of Undertaker vs. DiBiase.

We recap Isaac Yankem vs. Bret Hart. I’ll let Todd Petingill explain it to you in his voiceovers:

Lawler did what he does best: got somebody else to fight his battles for him. He went out and got someone else to fight for him. He got a dentist. Yankem was a demented tooth fairy.”

Tell me that “He got a dentist” line doesn’t sound straight out of bad horror movie trailer.

Isaac Yankem vs. Bret Hart

You might know Yankem better as Fake Diesel, who you might know better as Kane. Isaac’s music is made up of dentist drills which is rather creepy. Bret wants to know if he has to fight an evil chiropractor next. The fans lose their minds for Bret, which makes you wonder why he’s fighting A FREAKING DENTIST. Isaac grabs him by the throat and sends Bret into the corner to take over early. This is his debut so Bret isn’t sure what to do with him.

Bret’s right hands in the corners don’t get him anywhere but he avoids a charge and takes Yankem to the floor with some clotheslines. A plancha takes Isaac down and a middle rope clothesline looks to set up the Sharpshooter but Isaac blocks. Instead a backslide gets two for Hart, only to have Isaac throw him into the ropes and tie up Bret’s arm. The hard whip into the corner puts Bret down and the ropes look pretty loose. Yankem stomps Bret down in the corner and puts him on his back for a choke but Hart counters into a small package.

Lawler rants about having to kiss Bret’s feet after a previous match and is thrilled when Isaac clotheslines him to the floor. Bret is rammed back first into the post and the selling is the mastery you would expect it to be. Back in and Yankem hits a top rope Fameasser for two and a pair of clotheslines for two. Bret knocks him to the floor and sends him into the steps before getting two off the bulldog back inside. The backbreaker sets up the middle rope elbow but Lawler breaks up the Sharpshooter.

Bret is sent into the steps again as Lawler is playing cheerleader. Yankem loads up the top rope clothesline but Bret slams him down and pounds away in the corner. Bret trips Yankem up and ties the legs around the post to stomp away before going after Jerry. Isaac escapes and dives off the top onto Bret before tying his head up in the ropes. That’s finally enough for the referee and he throws the match out.

Rating: C. This took time to get going but you could see the potential in Yankem. The problem is he was a gimmick wrestler in the vein of T.L. Hopper and Repo Man: you can only go so far with one idea. That’s why Kane was the idea that worked: it was a character that could evolve and had more than one idea to him, thereby making him interesting and someone with staying power. That’s why WWF in 1995 was so terrible: they were all about the dull one note characters and the interest never was there.

Razor Ramon says he’s ready to become a four time Intercontinental Champion and there’s nothing Shawn can do to stop it. Shawn’s pain brings him pleasure and he better be ready to dance.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon

This is the second ladder match and Shawn is defending. Michaels is over like free beer in a frat house at this point so Razor is the heel by default. The original plan was Shawn vs. Sid but I guess Vince decided to give the show one awesome match to go with the rest of the drek. Also Doc Hendrix is on commentary now. Vince says you would have to be Andre the Giant with a jetpack on your back to reach the belt. SOMEBODY MAKE THAT MOVIE NOW!!!

They slug it out to start and things speed WAY up until Razor avoids a superkick. A quick Razor’s Edge is escaped and we have a stalemate. Razor hits his driving shoulders and whips Shawn over the corner and out to the floor. Doesn’t that put him closer to the ladders? Shawn jumps Ramon as he goes for the ladder because SHAWN gets to bring in the ladder. Razor suplexes Shawn to the floor with Shawn hitting his knee on the barricade. You can hear Vince see Wrestlemania flash before his eyes.

Back in and both finishers miss again and they clothesline each other down. Razor kicks him into the corner and hits a middle rope fall away slam. We get the first ladder brought in as Sid watches in the back. Shawn heads to the floor as the ladder is thrown in but Razor drops him with a great right hand. Shawn shoves the ladder over to stop Razor’s climb and going up himself, only to have his tights pulled down and his leg caught in the falling ladder. Razor slams the leg in between the ladder in a smart move.

The knee is slammed into the ladder as Razor is starting to go heel mid match. He slams Shawn down onto the ladder a few times as the fans aren’t sure what to think of this. The ladder is placed on the middle rope but Shawn can’t be whipped across the ring. He can however send Razor (who has bad ribs, mentioned for the first time here) into the ladder. Razor comes right back and drops the knee on the ladder before cannonballing down onto the leg. Shawn uses the good leg to shove him to the floor, only to have Razor wrap the leg around the post.

Razor makes his climb but Shawn comes off the top with an ax handle to break it up. Both guys go up the same side of the ladder but it’s Shawn taking Ramon down with a belly to back suplex. Shawn moves the ladder into the corner and sends Razor hard into it before doing the same again in another corner. Michaels’ knee is suddenly fine as he stomps on Razor but climbs the ladder for a moonsault press. A splash off the top of the ladder misses though and both guys are done.

Ramon moves the ladder back to the middle of the ring and both guys climb very slowly. They slug it out on top of the ladder but both fall to the side, crotching themselves on the top rope. Shawn picks up the ladder and charges but falls to the floor with Razor falling out as well. Razor pulls out a second ladder and is fast enough to catch Shawn going up in a Razor’s Edge to put both guys down again.

Both guys climb a ladder but neither are directly under the belt. Shawn kicks Razor’s ladder down and jumps at the belt but crashes down to the mat instead. Ramon is backdropped to the floor on another Razor’s Edge attempt, leaving Shawn to climb up…..and fall when he tries to get the belt. Shawn is TICKED about the botch (how often do you hear about him making one of those?) and sprints up the ladder to retain.

Rating: A. This is a different kind of match than they had in 1994 but it’s still excellent stuff. The first match was all about the high spots but this was based in drama and who could survive the match. I wasn’t wild on Shawn forgetting his knee injury and the botches at the end, but that’s nitpicking an excellent match. This worked very well and was great stuff for nearly half an hour.

Razor hands Shawn the belt post match and reaffirms his face status.

Dean Douglas says the previous match wasn’t all that great and Ramon lays him out.

WWF World Title: King Mabel vs. Diesel

Diesel is defending and Mabel has Sir Mo with him. The idea here is Mabel has some kind of a Royal Plan to take the title off Diesel. Diesel fires off right hands to start but gets taken down by a big clothesline. The champion comes back with running clotheslines in the corner but can’t pick the fat man up. More clotheslines stagger Mabel and a running shot sends him out to the floor.

In the ONLY interesting spot of the match, Diesel dives over the top to take Mabel out. Mabel no sells it and sends Diesel into the post but has to stop for a Twinkie break. He finally charges into a boot and Diesel pounds away back inside. Mabel reverses a whip and hits the worst Boss Man Slam you’ll ever see. It looked like Diesel was hitting a DDT on the arm. The buckle pad was ripped off somewhere in there.

Mabel sits on Diesel’s back for another breather before hitting a slam. Mo gets on the apron as Mabel misses an elbow drop….and the referee is bumped off camera. Mo comes in for a double team and Luger runs in for the save but gets nailed by Diesel who thinks Luger is on Mabel’s side. Diesel is knocked to the floor and Mabel drops a leg before throwing the champion back in. Luger beats up Mo in the aisle as Mabel gets two off a belly to belly. A middle rope splash misses and a middle rope shoulder from Diesel is enough to retain the title.

Rating: F. Just….yeah. I’d love to know what Vince was on when he came up with this idea but it’s one powerful drug. Mabel was one of the worst heels of all time as he couldn’t move and was waddling around in shiny purple and gold. This was a terrible match as Diesel couldn’t do anything with the fattness. This might be the worst main event of all time. Luger would be in WCW in eight days on the debut of a show called Nitro.

Overall Rating: D. This show has one good thing going for it: Shawn vs. Razor is 34 minutes long counting intros and post match stuff. The rest of the show, only decent opener aside, is drek. This was a very bad time for the company as the Kliq was dominating everything (notice that they’re in the opening matches and the main events) as Bret was fighting a dentist. Things would pick up a bit by next year but the company was on its deathbed by then. This show is definitely bad but it’s not the worst show of all time.

Ratings Comparison

Hakushi vs. 1-2-3 Kid

Original: B

Redo: C+

Bob Holly vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

Original: D+

Redo: D

Smoking Guns vs. Blu Brothers

Original: D

Redo: D

Skip vs. Barry Horowitz

Original: B

Redo: D+

Alundra Blayze vs. Bertha Faye

Original: D+

Redo: F

Undertaker vs. Kama

Original: B-

Redo: D

Bret Hart vs. Isaac Yankem

Original: B-

Redo: C

Razor Ramon vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: B+

Redo: A

King Mabel vs. Diesel

Original: F+

Redo: F

Overall Rating

Original: F

Redo: D

The original had higher individual ratings but the overall rating was lower. I really was bad at this.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/29/history-of-summerslam-count-up-1995-worst-ppv-ever-pretty-much/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01IH7O904


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Monday Night Raw – March 20, 1995: Sweet Goodness 1995 Was Bad

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 20, 1995
Location: Memorial Civic Auditorium, Stockton, California
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jim Cornette

There are less than two weeks to go before Wrestlemania and that means it’s time to really crank up the football talk. Ignore the fact that it’s not the most exciting story in the world because there are CELEBRITIES involved and that makes up for any lack of interest, talent or care whatsoever. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Razor Ramon vs. Henry Godwinn

This is still during Henry’s heel push which went as far as the evil hog farmer character was going to take him. Razor starts in on the arm as we hear something about his contract issues. A wheelbarrow slam plants Razor and Cornette continues to amaze me by never being able to shut up. He goes from insulting Steve McMichael to talking about Ernie Ladd to hyping up the Tag Team Title match to doing color on this match in the span of two minutes.

Henry chokes on the ropes a bit and we hit the neck crank as Cornette goes on a mini rant about Jim Ross reporting on everything. We take a break and come back with Razor scoring with some right hands. A bad looking middle rope bulldog (more a cross body to the back) gets two on Henry but here’s the Roadie for a distraction. The 1-2-3 Kid comes out to kick Roadie in the face and for some reason Henry is distracted as well, allowing Razor to hit the Edge for the pin.

Rating: D. This was too long with Godwinn not being anything worth watching other than a big strong man and Razor being way off his game for some reason. The interference was a good call but Razor and the Kid were really getting tiresome at this point as they were almost glued together at the hip.

Post match Razor is ticked off at Backlund getting a title shot on some upcoming Sunday night special. Razor wants to know what happens if Backlund wins the title and goes to Wrestlemania to defend against Bret so he basically promises to interfere in the match.

Just in case you have no idea what’s going on here, we see Backlund signing the contract last week.

Also on that Sunday night show, Lex Luger will face Tatanka in a cage match.

Jim Cornette leaves commentary to get ready for the Tag Team Title match.

Fan Festival ad.

Lawrence Taylor says he’s scared of snakes and alligators but he doesn’t see those things in Bigelow.

Yesterday on Action Zone, Bigelow shoulder blocked Doink like a football player.

Steve McMichael replaces Cornette on commentary.

King Kong Bundy vs. Raven Clarke/Adam Croomes

Bundy slams the jobbers together and the camera keeps cutting to the announcers instead. This just keeps going for awhile and an Avalanche ends Croomes.

Post destruction, here’s Kama to get in a brawl with McMichael.

Wrestlemania Report with a few nothing interviews that fill in some time.

Tag Team Titles; Smoking Gunns vs. Heavenly Bodies

The Bodies (Jimmy Del Ray and Tom Prichard, basically another attempt to recreate the Midnight Express) are challenging and have Cornette in their corner, leaving Vince alone on commentary. Billy has bad ribs coming in but starts with Tom anyway. Cornette yells at Del Ray for some reason, leaving Tom to get chopped by Bart.

Back to Billy for an armbar before Bart elbows Del Ray in the jaw. We take a break and come back with Tom holding Bart in a front facelock. Billy accidentally distracts the referee to break up a tag as this match just keeps going. A double clothesline drops Bart as the fans are trying to find ANYTHING to care about in this thing. In case the match wasn’t boring enough yet, Prichard puts on a reverse chinlock.

Del Ray misses a top rope splash but we need a double clothesline before the hot tag can bring in Billy. A modified Sidewinder looks to finish Tom but Del Ray comes in off the top and puts…..no one into a cover for some reason. Billy grabs a backslide for the pin to retain the titles.

Rating: D+. Technically the match was certainly acceptable but there’s just no interest in watching these teams fight. Neither team has a personality between them and it was clearly just a Rock N Roll Express vs. Midnight Express knockoff without anything that made those matches work. Well, save for Cornette of course.

We see clips from a charity auction last night with Undertaker signing autographs. That’s always weird to see.

Vince and Cornette preview the Sunday Night Slam (Sunday special) to end the show.

Actually not quite as Tatanka is ready for Luger in a cage next week to really end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Really not much to this one either as we’re heading straight for Wrestlemania with every single boring story they can cram in there along the way. The long tag match at the end didn’t help things either as it really didn’t set up the title defense at Wrestlemania. To be fair though that would imply something is more important than the football match and that’s just not true. There was very little sarcasm in that last sentence if that wasn’t clear.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Monday Night Raw – November 29, 1993: The Good Thing About The Kliq

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 29, 1993
Location: Westchester County Civic Center, White Plains, New York
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan

We’re past Survivor Series and thankfully this was taped after Survivor Series so we don’t have some lame stand alone show to fill in time before the next taping. Now it’s that weird place where we need to start getting ready for the Royal Rumble but it’s still several weeks away so we can’t quite get there yet. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Steiner Brothers vs. Mike Khoury/Reno Riggins

Scott throws Mike around to start and gives him a dragon suplex of all things. Rick beats up Riggins a bit and it’s back to Scott for an armbar. The Steiner Screwdriver makes Heenan cringe (rightfully so) before the Frankensteiner puts Khoury away.

Rating: C. Any match that has the Screwdriver in it makes me smile, even if it probably broke half of Reno’s neck in the process. The Steiners were just such a dominant team and I’m surprised they didn’t get to hold the titles longer. That being said, they were always more of a WCW team than a WWF team but their run was always cool. They wouldn’t do much more but they would have several months to go in the company.

BUY THE REPLAY!

Jeff Jarrett can’t get a meeting at a talent agency. Is this going ANYWHERE anytime soon?

Razor Ramon vs. Diesel

Non-title. Diesel shoves him into the corner a few times to start as Heenan talks about Rio Rogers (a Dusty Rhodes knockoff). Some knees to the back have Razor in even more trouble and there’s the running crotch attack with Razor over the ropes. A side slam gets two and we hit the bearhug. This really does show you how much better Diesel got in a hurry as he’s gone from a boring match here to some good stuff with Razor the following year.

There’s the big boot (which made great contact) followed by Snake Eyes for a delayed cover. Diesel charges into a boot in the corner and Razor’s middle rope bulldog (formerly the Hall Buster in the AWA) gets two. The Razor’s Edge is loaded up but Shawn Michaels runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C. I know the Kliq gets a lot of flack but they really did have good matches against each other. I’m fairly sure this was the first time these two wrestled (certainly the first time on TV at least) and they had a pretty good power match with the screwy ending being necessary to protect both guys.

The 1-2-3 Kid saves Razor.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. John Crystal

Crystal actually gets in a few shots to start as Heenan makes fun of Gorilla Monsoon. A hard clothesline stops that offense and it’s time for a neck crank. Bigelow slams him and demands Doink get out here. An enziguri finishes Crystal with ease.

Rating: D. Bigelow was kind of a weird fit at this point as he was being treated as a bigger star than he used to be but wasn’t really doing anything. Somehow this would result in a Wrestlemania main event about a year and a half later because wrestling really is funny that way. Not bad so soon after the Four Doink match disaster.

On Wrestling Challenge, Santa Claus gave Doink a miniature clown (in a bag) named Dink. See there can’t be more than one Doink (because it would create chaos) so he was named Dink instead.

Vince is in the ring to present the Superstar of the Year Award. In November? Anyway Vince brings out Lex Luger as the runner up, which is rather impressive considering he didn’t really do anything all year. Luger thanks everyone who voted for him and congratulates the winner for everything he’s accomplished. With that he brings out Bret Hart as Heenan thinks he’s in line for the REAL trophy next year. Bret is honored to win and knows he has a lot of challenges left to achieve. The award is dedicated to everyone who has stood by him and this isn’t really going anywhere.

We see the end of the Hart Family vs. Shawn Michaels and his Knights with only Owen being eliminated. This would be the very early stages of Owen’s heel turn and amazing series against Bret.

Owen Hart vs. Chris Duffy

In a change of pace, Owen wears Bret glasses and gives them to a fan ala his brother. Owen dropkicks him down and hits a legdrop as we get a WE WANT BRET chant. This seems to get on Owen’s nerves as he backdrops Duffy for no cover. Duffy is sent to the floor and taken out with a plancha. Back in and a missile dropkick sets up the Sharpshooter to complete the squash.

Heenan can’t get an interview with Owen.

Scott Taylor vs. Ludvig Borga

That would be Scotty 2 Hotty. Taylor avoids an early elbow and has almost no effect off a dropkick. One heck of a clothesline turns Taylor inside out and Borga chokes him with one arm. Borga torture racks him for the fast submission.

The 1-2-3 Kid accepts a challenge to face Shawn next week.

Overall Rating: C-. Some better wrestling helps this one a lot though it might have more to do with less Quebecer singles matches. They’re certainly back to the stand alone/lower level shows at this point which makes every week a lot more hit or miss than the times where we’re building towards the big shows. You can also see the rise of the Kliq starting to take shape and that’s a mixed bag to say the least.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Night Raw – November 15, 1993: Let Freedom Ring

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 15, 1993
Location: Fernwood Resort, Bushkill, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan

The big story this week is a fan voted match with Lex Luger facing Pierre the Quebecer in a match that really isn’t the most interesting thing in the world. Other than that we find out who will be the replacement on the All Americans now that Tatanka has been injured. That’s quite the cool moment so let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Savage going nuts and attacking Vince to go after Crush last week.

Opening sequence.

Savage has been suspended from commentary for a week in a logical move.

Razor Ramon vs. Brooklyn Brawler

Non-title. The referee won’t let the Brawler hit Razor with the title to start so Ramon shrugs off the early offense and punches him down. An atomic drop slows Ramon down as we hear about Shawn Michaels returning to the company. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Brawler ducks his head like an idiot, setting up the Razor’s Edge for the easy pin.

Crush is very happy with costing Savage his broadcasting job.

Headshrinkers vs. Mike Bucci/Mike Maraldo

Bucci would later be known as Nova/Simon Dean. Fatu headbutts Bucci around to start as the announcers talk about Savage being gone this week. A double headbutt puts him down as we’re firmly in squash territory here. Unfortunately this leads to a discussion of the Four Doinks, which would be the only match I ever turned off in the middle of a review because it was horrible. A double Stroke sets up Samu’s top rope splash to squash Bucci for good.

Rating: D. I’ve always been a Headshrinkers fan as they’re such a simple gimmick but they knew how to make it work. Their face run was a lot more entertaining but at the moment we’re stuck with them as your run of the mill island savages. On the other hand it’s always cool to see someone like Bucci as a fresh rookie before he became a fairly well known name.

We go back to Superstars over the weekend with the announcement of Tatanka’s replacement on the All Americans. That would be…..the Undertaker, who says he’ll fight with them against these Foreign Fanatics. He opens the coat to reveal an American flag and says let freedom ring in a really cool moment.

Pierre vs. Lex Luger

Pierre is one half of the Tag Team Champions. Luger whips him across the ring a few times to start and gets two off a belly to back suplex. A backdrop on the floor gets two for Luger and we take an early break. Back with Luger working on the arm but some left hands get Pierre out of trouble.

Luger gets up but Pierre’s manager Johnny Polo grabs the leg (with the referee not only seeing him but yelling about it), allowing Pierre to send him into the steps. A Vader Bomb gets two on Luger and Heenan is shocked at the kickout. He does realize it was Pierre right? Pierre puts on a bad looking reverse chinlock but Luger powers out as we take a break.

Back with the hold on again and a piledriver getting two on Lex. A really weird looking top rope legdrop (with Pierre trying to spin around to drop the other leg instead of the one you would expect) gets the same and it’s time for Luger’s comeback. Some right hands and a slam off the top set up the flying forearm to finish Pierre off. Heenan’s rant about all the metal in the arm is great.

Rating: D-. This is really on whoever decided to put Pierre in this match as there was no reason to think he could handle a nearly fifteen minute match on his own. There’s a reason you put him in a tag team so a veteran like Jacques can carry a lot of the work but it was basically suicide to put him out here and ask him to carry half of a match.

Post break Jacques and Johnny have trouble waking Pierre up.

Diesel vs. Sid Garrison

Oh yeah Diesel is still a thing. Diesel powers him into the corner with ease and a neck crank fills in more time. A big boot and an elbow drop of all things put Sid away.

Rating: D. It’s not a good sign when I forgot that Diesel was a thing at this point but that’s what you have to expect when Shawn was put out of action just a few months after Diesel debuted. There really wasn’t much of a point to do anything with him which explains his fairly random association with IRS at Survivor Series.

Survivor Series control center. There’s not much here other than the announcement that Pierre has a concussion and may be out of the main event.

We wrap it up in Nashville with Jeff Jarrett yelling at I think the record producer (as portrayed by the future Jacqueline). He’ll be fine despite the lack of backup though.

Overall Rating: D-. Oh yeah this was bad. Survivor Series is almost here but they’re not exactly hitting the ground running with one change after another. Undertaker is a good addition and Pierre is a better subtraction but they need to just announce the teams already and be done with it because these constant changes are getting really annoying to keep up with.

One more note: there is no November 22 show as Survivor Series was two nights later. Instead there was a clipped version of a big special called Survivor Series Showdown which aired the night before. For reasons I don’t quite understand, this was listed as a lost episode of Raw, which I think had something to do with getting to Raw 1000. It was finally aired on WWE.com a few years back and it was actually pretty good. Here’s the link if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/01/24/monday-night-raw-november-22-1993-survivor-series-showdown-the-lost-episode/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Monday Night Raw – November 1, 1993: Bobby Heenan Deserves Better

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 1, 1993
Location: Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie, New York
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan

It’s another fresh month as we’re getting closer to the Survivor Series. Unfortunately it’s late 1993 and that means we’re in for some very hit and miss shows but we’re also in for a confusing few weeks as the main event is sorted out. It’s a dark time for the creative direction of the company so let’s get this over with. Let’s get to it.

Bobby Heenan finds Bastion Booger eating a bunch of food. Heenan: “None of this food is….” Booger: “IT’S RAW!”

Opening sequence.

Bastion Booger vs. Razor Ramon

Non-title. Booger is just embarrassingly fat here. The toothpick throw gets us going and Razor easily puts him up against the ropes for a soft slap to the chest. We take an early break and come back with Booger getting two off a splash and Heenan admitting that it’s his birthday. For some reason this stuns Vince as Razor ties Booger in the ropes for a……belly rub?

They head outside with Booger actually hitting the splash against the post. A bearhug goes nowhere so Booger starts slowly hammering away. Booger gets two off a World’s Strongest Slam as Heenan suggests Bastion could use the title as a tray at his birthday party. Another bearhug just seems to annoy Razor so he gets out and slams the big man. The Razor’s Edge is laughable at best so Booger sits on Razor’s chest and gets sunset flipped to give Ramon the pin.

Rating: D. Yeah this was horrible but what else were you expecting from someone as worthless as Booger? He was huge, he wasn’t anything worth seeing in the ring and his gimmick was that he was fat and gross. Razor is an incredible talent but he can’t do anything with someone like that.

Here’s a Survivor Series report, including a preview of a boxing match between Riddick Bowe and Evander Holyfield II. After that cross promotion, we hear the current main event lineup: the All Americans (Lex Luger/Tatanka/Steiner Brothers) vs. the Foreign Fanatics (Yokozuna/Quebecers/Ludvig Borga) but this weekend, the Fanatics beat Tatanka down and cost him his first ever pinfall loss in about two years. Luger tried to make the save (and to high five fans while jogging down to help his partner) but was stopped by one of the Quebecers.

Back in the arena, the Foreign Fanatics are in the ring for a chat. Cornette keeps laughing about how “Tatanto” is out of the Survivor Series where it’s all about surviving. Jim goes on a rant about all the possibilities the Survivor Series could see before Quebecers’ manager Johnny Polo talks about a team of anthropologists coming up from Bora Bora to see this kind of stupidity in person.

Borga says Scott Steiner’s American dream will never come true next week when he takes Scott out personally. Cornette wraps it up by saying that just like in Ten Little Indians, there will be none at the end of Survivor Series. Heenan: “And they’re all coming to my birthday party!”

Mr. Perfect vs. The Executioner

Executioner is your standard masked man. Some chops have Executioner in trouble but he whips Perfect into the corner. That’s about it for the jobber offense though as Perfect avoids a corner charge and kicks him in the ribs. We hit a leg lock on Executioner, followed by a spinning toehold to slow things down even more. This goes on WAY too long with Perfect pulling on the leg as Heenan suggests that his birthday be made a national holiday. The PerfectPlex gives him the pin to finally wrap this up.

Rating: D. WAY too long here despite it not even being four minutes long. This was a bunch of waiting around while Perfect worked on the leg which went nowhere, only to have the PerfectPlex end it a few seconds later. I’m not sure what was up with Perfect here but it got really old in a hurry.

Jeff Jarrett is in Nashville and complains about the politics in country music holding him back. He’s sick of seeing Billy Ray Cyrus with his buggy whip arms getting so much exposure. Jeff is ready to face people like Razor Ramon, Men on a Mission and the 1-2-3 Kid. This gimmick was dead on sight and I think everyone knew it.

Well Dunn vs. Smoking Gunns

Well and Dunn have purple thongs over their black singlets. Normally I would say that would tell you everything you need to know about them, but their names are Well and Dunn. Billy jumps over Dunn to start and punches him to the face as Heenan says Harvey Wippleman will be at his birthday party.

Some armdrags put Well down and we hit the armbar as this dead show keeps going. A suplex/high cross body combo gets two but Well snaps Bart’s throat across the top rope to take over. We hit the chinlock on Bart to kill even more time before Well tags out to Dunn for another chinlock. Back up and the hot tag brings in Billy for a running clothesline. Harvey trips him up though…..and they actually end this on a DQ after over seven minutes.

Rating: D-. Well Dunn vs. the Smoking Gunns just went to a DQ in nearly eight minutes. This was one of the worst matches I’ve seen in a very long time and I have no idea who thought this was something that needed to air on national TV. Horrible stuff here that just kept going and made an awful show even worse.

Randy Savage calls in to say he’ll be back to take care of Crush. Heenan makes fun of Savage’s voice because he’s a bit insane.

Adam Bomb vs. Virgil

Your main event people. They stare at each other to start until Virgil gets two off a cross body (though it looked like Bomb was supposed to catch him). That means it’s time for Adam to have a meeting on the floor with Wippleman, who Virgil chases around for fun. Back in and Virgil dives over the top but somehow winds up under Bomb. They head inside again with Adam hitting him in the head and slowly working Virgil over, only to miss a charge in the corner. Virgil scores with a dropkick but his cross body bounces off Bomb in what looks like another botch. The Adam Smasher (powerbomb) puts Virgil away.

Rating: D+. Who would have guessed that Virgil vs. Adam Bomb would somehow be the match of the night? Virgil actually tried in this one and got in some good offense, but when your opponent can’t figure out how to take a cross body, there’s only so much you can do. Bomb would get MUCH better after turning face but this was a hard one to sit through.

Heenan starts singing Happy Birthday to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. Holy sweet lederhosen this was a horrid show. The stuff for Survivor Series wasn’t bad but with this being the last episode of a TV taping, they basically threw whatever last talent they had out there to fill in some time. Just a dreadful show here, which really is the theme of this era.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XI: Playing Chess With Mr. Backlund

Wrestlemania XI
Date: April 2, 1995
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Attendance: 16,305
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Vince McMahon

This is one of the dark Wrestlemanias in that it was a very bad time for the company. That being said, the show was very well received and wound up being kind of a saving grace for the WWF. The main events are Diesel defending the title against Shawn (shocking I know) and Bam Bam Bigelow vs. NFL Hall of Famer (not at this point though) Lawrence Taylor. Let’s get to it.

We open with clips from every Wrestlemania. That’s a nice idea, especially for back then when you can do this in 90 seconds. Today it would take way too long. Apparently Pamela Anderson, Jenny McCarthy and others are starring in this show. Good to know indeed.

A special Olympian sings America the Beautiful. Nothing wrong with that.

Allied Powers vs. Blu Brothers

I don’t remember if Allied Powers was their official name but it’s Luger/British Bulldog. The Brothers are whatever name you best know the Harris Brothers by, which is most likely the DOA. The timing of this redo is perfect, as their manager is Uncle Zebekiah, who is currently Zeb Colter, manager of Jack Swagger. It’s a big brawl to start and the good guys hit stereo powerslams to take over. Bulldog and we’ll say Jacob (partner of Eli) start and there’s the delayed vertical after only a few seconds.

Off to a headlock by the Brit as Vince sounds like he’s in an auditorium for some reason. The Brothers take over with heel power moves and it’s off to Eli for a side slam. A double big boot from the twins puts Bulldog right back down but Bulldog starts firing off right hands. With the referee holding the Bulldog back, the Brothers pull a switch but they switch back just a few seconds later. That’s some high quality leadership there Zeb.

We’ll say Jacob takes too much time on a middle rope elbow so the British guy moves. Hot tag brings in Luger and house is cleaned. There’s a powerslam and the steel forearm smash gets two. Zebekiah interferes and the twins switch again, allowing Eli to kick out of the forearm which didn’t hit him. Not that it matters as British hits a sunset flip for the pin out of nowhere. Not that he was legal or anything but who cares?

Rating: C-. This match uh…..exists I guess. Seriously that’s all I’ve got here. It wasn’t a good match or anything but I’ve seen worse. That’s the problem here: it’s so average that it’s barely worth talking about. Luger would be gone in a few months back to WCW, which was the best move as he was doing stuff like this for the next six months or so. Nothing to see here at all and a really odd choice for a match and especially the opener.

Apparently that win deserves fireworks. If that’s the high point of the show, we’re in BIG trouble.

Zebekiah demands justice because the wrong Blu got pinned.

Nicholas Turturro is supposed to interview Pamela Anderson but we have audio difficulties.

Lawler explains football: it’s just like the post office. “Eleven guys spend an hour trying to move a small object 100 yards.” Andy Griffith he is not.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Razor Ramon

Jarrett, the champion, has a manager here named The Roadie who would become Jesse James, making this the ultimate battle of the double initials. This is a rematch from the Rumble where Ramon got counted out but agreed to come back in where he lost the title when his knee gave out. The 1-2-3 Kid is with Razor to counteract the Roadie. Razor decks Jeff to start and the champion immediately heads to the floor. That’s nice of him as it allows Razor’s pyro to go off.

A big right hand takes Jarrett down and Razor clotheslines him out to the floor for good measure. Back in and a sunset flip out of the corner by the champion is blocked by a right hand. Ramon keeps up his barrage of punches by faking Jarrett out and punching him even more. Roadie bails Jarrett out of the Razor’s Edge and the champion regroups a bit on the floor.

Back inside and Roadie cheats a bit with some choking, only to have Jeff miss a charge and land on him. All Razor so far. Back in again and Jarrett hits a swinging neckbreaker and some dropkicks to take over. We hit the chinlock for a bit before things speed up with both guys getting near falls. Jarrett hooks a sleeper that lasts even less time than the chinlock so Jeff punches him down and hooks another chinlock.

Razor escapes again via a suplex but both guys are down. They get up at the same time and collide to put them down again. That’s a bit of overkill but whatever. Again they get up and a double punch puts them down for a third time. Ramon comes back with more punches and they actually stay up for once. A fallaway slam gets two and there’s the discus punch to put Jarrett down again. The Kid tries to interfere but gets kicked into the barricade.

Razor loads up his middle rope bulldog but misses and lands on his bad knee. The Figure Four goes on and Razor is in trouble. After some interference from Roadie, Ramon turns the hold over but Jeff quickly lets it go. Ramon hits a quick belly to back superplex to put Jarret down and it’s time for the Edge, which draws in Roadie for the DQ.

Rating: C. This match was mainly punches but Razor was so insanely over the he carried the crowd. Jarrett was pretty dull at this point but he would reach all new levels of dull later on in WCW. Razor would finally get the title back in a ladder match on a house show in May, but it would only last for two days. The match here was ok but nothing worth seeing. It was better than the first match though.

Post match Jarrett puts the Kid in the Figure Four.

Jarrett says that was perfectly good conduct for a champion.

Turturro is with Jenny McCarthy and nothing of note is said. Pamela Anderson is nowhere to be seen but Shawn pops in to say nothing is wrong. Team DiBiase is behind them planning for later. Sid says Diesel is going down tonight.

King Kong Bundy vs. Undertaker

This is part of the never ending Undertaker vs. Million Dollar Corporation feud. The Corporation stole the Urn at the Rumble and tonight is about revenge and getting the Urn back. Before Taker comes out, Todd Pettingil talks to some football player. The referee is a Major League umpire who is moonlighting because MLB is on strike. Undertaker stares at DiBiase before the bell and Ted drops the Urn.

Taker pounds away to start and hits Young School but he can’t drop Bundy. The jumping clothesline finally puts him down but Bundy knocks him over the top to the floor in retaliation. Taker lands on his feet right in front of DiBiase and takes the Urn back from him. Paul Bearer gets the Urn back but Kama Mustafa (Godfather) comes out to steal the Urn back. This is like a bad comedy.

Taker tries to stop the theft but Bundy jumps the Dead Man, allowing Kama to get it. He says he’s going to melt it down and make it a necklace. Bundy pounds on Taker a bit and slams him down before getting two off a knee drop. We hit the fat man chinlock fot a bit before Taker fights up, only to get caught by the Avalanche in the corner. No selling is done today, and it’s a slam and the jumping clothesline to make Taker 4-0.

Rating: D. This was nothing but a formality for Undertaker as we continue the Urn stealing story for even longer. Bundy was worthless here, other than offering some long forgotten star power. This feud kept going and never got interesting at all since DiBiase’s team was all lame power guys. Nothing to see here and probably Undertaker’s least interesting Mania match ever.

Turturro still can’t find Pamela Anderson. Instead he finds Lawrence Taylor’s All-Pro team of football players who are here to counter the Million Dollar Team. One of these guys is Mongo, future US Champion. Turturro moves on to find Bob Backlund playing chess with Jonathan Taylor Thomas. Backlund goes nuts when he hears Anderson is missing because he has no idea who she is.

Thomas (a 12 year old actor from Home Improvement at the time) checkmates him so Backlund accuses him of taking advantage of his elders. Backlund asks him three questions (who was the 34th President, what is the capital of Honduras, and who is Chief Justice of the Supreme Court) which Thomas answers correctly. Backlund: “THAT’S THE TROUBLE WITH YOUTH TODAY!!! THEY THINK THEY KNOW EVERTHING!!!” Crazy Backlund was GOLD.

Tag Titles: Owen Hart/??? vs. Smoking Gunns

Owen introduces Yokozuna as his mystery partner. The Gunns are defending here and say they’ll win. Owen and Billy start things off with Hart trying to speed things up. That goes badly for him as Billy slaps him in the face and brings in Bart to work on the arm. Owen fights back though and brings in Yoko who misses an elbow drop. Back to Owen as we’re firmly in the Colossal Connection formula (Owen does the wrestling, Yoko comes in for a few seconds to destroy whoever he’s fighting).

The Gunns hit a double legsweep on Hart and a double flapjack gets two. Owen finally escapes a backdrop attempt and brings in Yoko. Billy gets taken down and sat on, giving the foreigners control. Off to a nerve hold which hopefully doesn’t last as long as the ones last year did. After we kill a minute or so in the hold, Owen loads up a missile dropkick but hits his partner by mistake. There’s the hot tag to Bart and house is cleaned, but Billy walks into a belly to belly suplex. The Banzai Drop hits but Bart breaks up the pin. Not that it really matters though as Owen covers Billy for the pin and the title, Owen’s first in the company.

Rating: C-. Another decent but lackluster match here which is the theme of this show. The Gunns losing was definitely the right call as Owen and Yoko made for dominant champions for several months. Other than that though, the match was boring stuff overall. Owen finally getting a title was a good moment though.

Bam Bam Bigelow is in the back and we look at the history between him and Taylor. At the Rumble, Bigelow lost in the finals of a tag title tournament and Taylor laughed at him. Bigelow shoved him and Wrestlemania was made. Bigelow doesn’t have anything significant to say here. For some reason Todd Pettingil has headphones on here, presumably because of the audio difficulties. Apparently Lawler accidentally kicked some cords out and the commentary had to be re-recorded later. Maybe that’s what’s going on.

Bret Hart vs. Bob Backlund

This is an I Quit match with Roddy Piper as guest referee. They had a previous I Quit match at Survivor Series which wound up being pretty awesome as an old school style match that ran about thirty five minutes. Thanks to Owen cheating, Backlund won the title and shocked the world, so tonight is about revenge for Hart. Piper is here for no apparent reason whatsoever.

Bret pounds away to start and sends Backlund hard into the corner. An early Sharpshooter attempt is blocked so Bret drops an elbow. Bret keeps pounding on him and Piper asks if Backlund quits way too often. Another Sharpshooter attempt doesn’t work so here’s a Figure Four by Bret instead. Backlund turns it over but Bret lets go before it goes badly for him.

Off to a leg lock by Hart as the match slows down a bit. We hear about Bret hating Japanese people which was an angle that didn’t go anywhere. Backlund grabs at Bret’s face to escape before finally just kicking Hart in the face. Bob starts going after the arm but Bret avoids the chickenwing. Instead it’s a Fujiwara Armbar and the fans are getting restless. Bob pounds on the arm even more with an armbar as Piper asks Bret if he gives up for about the dozenth time.

Bret finally fights back and hits the backbreaker and middle rope elbow. The Sharpshooter doesn’t work but Bret misses a charge into the corner, going shoulder first into the post. Bob hooks the chickenwing but Bret reverses into one of his own. Backlund yells incoherently which apparently counts as a submission, giving Bret the win.

Rating: D+. I love the original version of this but the rematch didn’t work at all. For one thing, a match about making someone quit with guys of this caliber should probably be longer than ten minutes. On top of that, it was really dull stuff. This didn’t work at all and even Bret has said it’s one of his least favorite matches ever.

Backlund says he saw the light and looks crazier than usual.

Pamela Anderson is nowhere to be found so changes have been made. Ok then.

Diesel says something that I can’t understand because the audio keeps messing up. This is getting REALLY annoying. The audio is fixed long enough for Diesel to say nothing of note.

Jonathan Taylor Thomas comes out to be timekeeper for the title match. Turturro is ring announcer because we haven’t seen him enough tonight. At least he seems excited to be here though.

WWF World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Diesel

Diesel is defending and Jenny McCarthy comes out with Shawn. Pam Anderson comes out with Diesel to tick Shawn off, even though I thought McCarthy looked better. Shawn tries to jump Diesel but gets backdropped to the floor so Anderson can come in and pose. We actually get going and Shawn is dropped by a right hand. Diesel beals him out of the corner and Shawn is in trouble early.

A big backdrop puts Shawn down and Diesel throws him out to the floor. It’s time to stall until Sid distracts Diesel. That doesn’t work either as Diesel blasts Shawn coming in. Shawn pounds away in the corner but gets shoved away like he’s not even there. A suplex puts Shawn down and Diesel easily throws him out to the floor. Sid’s latest attempt at a distraction lets Shawn get in a few punches and gain brief control.

Diesel is thrown to the floor but Shawn skins the cat to stay alive. A BIG dive off the top takes Diesel down and a baseball slide keeps him down. Shawn tries another baseball slide but Diesel steps to the side, only to accidentally ram himself ribs first into the post. A Sid chant breaks out as Shawn hits a running splash off the apron. They get back in as Sid and Hebner get in an argument which goes nowhere.

Shawn stays on the ribs before getting two off a middle rope bulldog. Back to the injured back/ribs of Diesel we go as the fans are behind Shawn now. A top rope elbow hits the back for two. The champ counters a front facelock into a backdrop and there’s a second one. Shawn sends him into the buckle to slow Diesel down again and there’s a sleeper. The champ escapes and hits a corner clothesline followed by Snake Eyes.

We head to the floor for a second time and Diesel wins a quick slugout. Sid tries to interfere and does nothing at all so we head back inside for a superkick. The referee has hurt his ankle (has there ever been a more prone to injury referee than Earl Hebner? He’s ALWAYS getting hurt) so the kick only gets two. Sid rips a buckle pad off but Diesel suplexes Shawn down before he can do anything about it.

They’re both down now as Hebner’s ankle is strong enough for him to stand up now. Shawn goes to the middle rope for something resembling a dropkick but jumps into a side slam. That was a cool looking catch. Diesel still can’t follow up because of the ribs but he manages to scoop Shawn’s legs out and launch him into (the buckle below) the exposed buckle. A big boot and the Jackknife retain the title as Anderson asks someone if she’s supposed to be clapping now.

Rating: B. It’s good but somehow this won Match of the Year in PWI. For the life of me I have no idea how as it’s not even Shawn’s best match of the year. The rematch would be MUCH better with a typical David vs. Goliath formula. The lack of such a formula here was weird as Diesel, the 7’0 monster, was the underdog. Shawn would turn face very soon after this.

Diesel celebrates with all the celebrities.

Shawn goes on a rant (calling the superkick Chin Music, perhaps for the first time but I’m not sure) about how the referee being hurt cost him the title.

The Million Dollar Team is introduced for the main event: Bundy, Tatanka, Nikolai Volkoff, Kama, I.R.S. and DiBiase himself. We also get the NFL All-Pro Team: Ken Norton, Chris Speilman, Rickey Jackson, Carl Banks, Steve McMichael and Reggie White.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Lawrence Taylor

R&B group Salt N Peppa sings What A Man live for Taylor’s entrance. Pat Patterson is guest referee to make sure things go as smoothly as possible. Taylor is a legit NFL superstar so this is an actual big deal as far as celebrities go. There are a TON of reporters and photographers at ringside plus the two teams so it looks like a lumberjack match. Before the bell, Taylor SMACKS Bigelow in the face and we’re ready to go. Oh and Diesel has been training with Taylor. Remember that.

A big forearm immediately puts Bigelow down and a clothesline puts him on the floor. The crowd is losing it over this stuff as Taylor looks GREAT. Back in and a bulldog (decent one too) gets two for Taylor. There’s a hip toss and Bigelow needs a breather. In two minutes, Taylor has already showed more skill and fire than McMichael showed in two and a half years in WCW. Lawrence follows him to the floor and a big brawl almost starts between the teams.

Back in and Bigelow gets in some shots to take over including a headbutt. A falling headbutt misses so Taylor fires off a big forearm to take Bigelow down. Bam Bam pounds him right back down and puts on a Boston crab which almost immediately shifts into a half crab. It breaks down even further into Bigelow just pulling on one leg. Now he just leans on it instead of cranking on it.

Taylor fights up again and hits a suplex of all things to give himself a breather. It’s a quick breather though as Bigelow pounds away even more. There’s Bigelow’s moonsault but he “hurts” his knee in the process. Lawrence kicks out at two (ZERO reaction for the crowd for some reason) and it’s time for a comeback. Bigelow ducks his head so Taylor tries something resembling a suplex that was supposed to be a Jackknife.

Bigelow misses an enziguri but Taylor falls down anyway. The top rope headbutt gets another two and the crowd reacts a bit. Taylor gets his last gasp of energy though and pounds Bigelow in the corner before hitting a pair of big forearms. A third from the middle rope is enough for the shocking upset.

Rating: B. All things considered, this was nothing short of a miracle. Keeping in mind that Taylor had zero experience coming in there, he looked amazing. They didn’t have most of the problems that most celebrity matches have as Taylor looked like he had actual talent instead of looking like he needed someone to walk him through everything. As a regular match this wasn’t much, but all things considered this was great.

Taylor can barely stand up post match and the team has to help him back. DiBiase goes on a rant to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. You often hear how terrible this show is but it really isn’t that bad. It’s terribly boring and uninteresting for the most part, but there are FAR worse shows out there. The other major problem this show has is that it’s a Wrestlemania. If this show was something like In Your House or even Summerslam it wouldn’t have nearly the bad reputation it does. It’s certainly not good or even decent but it’s FAR better than it’s given credit for.

Ratings Comparison

Allied Powers vs. Blu Brothers

Original: D

Redo: C-

Razor Ramon vs. Jeff Jarrett

Original: D+

Redo: C

Undertaker vs. King Kong Bundy

Original: F+

Redo: D

Owen Hart/Yokozuna vs. Smoking Gunns

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Bob Backlund vs. Bret Hart

Original: F+

Redo: D+

Diesel vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: B

Redo: B

Lawrence Taylor vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Original: D+

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: F+

Redo: D+

Man alive what was bugging me when I watched it the first time? It’s not THAT bad.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/18/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-11-just-get-it-over-with/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6