IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: September 23, 2004
Location: America West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re coming up on No Mercy and that means it’s time to really get things going. Well as much as things can get going around here. The big story coming out of last week was Big Show deciding to face Kurt Angle at the pay per view, again because WWE doesn’t know how contracts actually work. The card isn’t looking thrilling but maybe they’ll get better tonight. Oh and it’s the fifth anniversary of the show so things might be a little different tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Vince McMahon welcomes us to the show and thanks us for five years. More great memories will be made tonight. Nothing wrong with that.

Opening sequence, and a new one at that. No words to the theme song, but an update was needed.

New graphics too, now with a white background.

Billy Kidman vs. Paul London

Hang on though as we have a replacement.

Booker T. vs. Paul London

Non-title. Booker jumps him fast to start and elbows London in the face for two. London has a busted nose but he comes back with a middle rope kick to the jaw to take over more than you might have expected. A hot shot gets Booker out of trouble though and we hit the double arm crank. London makes the comeback with a variety of kicks to the head for two but Booker rolls through a crossbody and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin. Ignore London’s shoulder being about eight inches off the mat.

Rating: C-. It was energetic while it lasted and that’s all I can ask for in something like this. I’m not sure why Booker came out for a match like this as he tends to be a somewhat cowardly champion but London got in some offense and Booker had to cheat to win. Not too bad here and when you consider how short it was, the match looks a little better.

Post match Booker says he’ll treat John Cena even worse but London jumps him from behind and leaves.

Cole won’t talk about Heidenreich but he’ll throw us to a Mick Foley video, talking about his favorite Smackdown moment. It’s from after a show went off the air when Rock was doing his shtick but dropped his sunglasses. They both stood there until Foley picked them up and got a “The Rock thanks you for that.” The transformation from Mankind into Cactus Jack gets a quick mention.

Kidman is about to leave when Theodore Long comes in to say he made a match and wanted to see it. Just like everyone wants to see Kidman doing the shooting star press. The match is going to happen and if it doesn’t, Kidman is fired.

Spike Dudley and Rey Mysterio have a staredown but Spike doesn’t want this set up as him stabbing Rey in the back. Rey thinks he’s loco and speaks some Spanish but here’s Kenzo Suzuki to tell Rey that he’ll be sorry. That means a shot to Suzuki’s face and Rey running.

Smackdown Throwback: Rock makes Coach do the Charleston. That was always a great pairing.

Some Phoenix Suns are here and don’t seem to want to look at the camera.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Spike Dudley

Spike is defending and has Bubba and D-Von in his corner. Rey starts fast by sending Spike face first into the corner and then he does it again for good measure. Bubba comes in for a cheap shot but gets caught, meaning it’s a double ejection. With Spike panicking, Rey hits a baseball slide but the referee won’t let him hit a dive. Instead Rey dives over the referee, in a spot straight out of ECW.

Back in and they bump heads for a break so abrupt that Cole has to apologize for it after the commercial. Rey goes shoulder first into the post but crotches the champ on top for the super hurricanrana. They’re certainly going back and forth here. The springboard spinning crossbody hits the referee, leaving Rey to load up the 619. Cue Suzuki and Rene Dupree to lay Mysterio out though and Spike retains.

Rating: C. I really don’t know what they see in Spike getting this kind of a push, though he’s certainly not the worst. It’s more along the lines of he’s not interesting and I don’t buy Bubba and D-Von as being intimidated or scared of him. They telegraphed the interference ending too and it didn’t help things. What we got was watchable, though this title reign has run its course.

Post match the beatdown is on until Rob Van Dam makes the save.

Video on the Wrestlemania XXI press conference. HHH gets in a good line by saying Hollywood is going Wrestlemania.

Stephanie McMahon’s favorite Smackdown moment was slapping her mom because it was hard for her to do. Or the mixed tag match where she was knocked off the apron and got knocked out on the steps because HHH came out and carried her to the back. Later that night, Kurt Angle kissed her, but he’s the worst kisser in the world.

Long makes Mysterio/Van Dam vs. Dupree/Suzuki for the titles at No Mercy. Long: “Fo shizzle fizzle.” Dupree: “FO SHIZZLE FIZZLE???”

Heidenreich is on his way to the ring but stops in Vince’s office instead, allowing Cole to calm down a bit.

Smackdown Throwback: Big Show and Brock Lesnar break the ring. That’s still a great visual.

Gangrel/Viscera vs. Undertaker

Fallout from last week with JBL hiring the former Ministry goons. Speaking of JBL, here he is in the limo, driving through Undertaker’s smoke for a somewhat cool visual. Viscera misses a charge in the corner (he never was that bright) and Undertaker punches Mideon without much trouble. Big boots abound but Viscera grabs a chokebomb to cut him off. The big splash gives Viscera two but a second attempt misses, allowing Undertaker to clothesline Gangrel. Undertaker cleans house with ease and the Tombstone finishes Gangrel. This was exactly what it should have been.

Post match Undertaker chokeslams (eh close enough) Viscera and crushes his throat with a chair while looking at JBL. A lot of pointing and posing ensues.

Heidenreich tells Vince that they’re similar but Vince doesn’t get where this is going. It’s a poem actually about how no one knows him, and that is a poem by Heidenreich.

Dawn Marie vs. Torrie Wilson

They’re both schoolgirls….but here’s Long to interrupt before anything can start. Actually hang on a second (playa) because he has a better idea.

Fabulous Moolah/Mae Young vs. Dawn Marie/Torrie Wilson

And yes they’re all schoolgirls. We go to the “comedy” with Mae and Dawn taking turns grabbing the referee’s pants. Torrie comes in and tries a sunset flip, with Mae sitting down on it for more laughter. There’s the required Bronco Buster and it’s off to Dawn vs. Moolah. Dawn loses her top to the first real pop of the match and a schoolgirl finishes Marie, thank goodness.

Rating: F. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from the Diva Search, it’s that WWE can indeed manage to screw up good looking women in nice outfits. I get the idea here but egads it’s just not funny. At least they beat up the models instead of the wrestlers and that’s about all the positives you can say about this one.

Steve Austin’s favorite Smackdown moment: the first Tribute to the Troops. Oh and singing to Vince McMahon, which really was a funny bit. So none of these people advertised last week are actually going to be here in person are they?

Billy Graham is here again, just like he was on Monday.

John Cena, on top of the production truck, talks about how great Smackdown has been over the years, even quoting the Rock’s greatest hits. Well that would be different today. He gets in a few Austin lines for a bonus before promising to win the Best of Five Series.

No Mercy rundown.

Kurt Angle demands our attention and lists off some great names he’s beaten on this show. Yet he wasn’t asked about his favorite Smackdown moment. That’s a disgrace, but not as much of a disgrace as Big Show. Last week Show signed up to face him at No Mercy, so tonight he’ll create his own Smackdown moment.

Hulk Hogan’s favorite Smackdown moment is winning the Tag Team Titles with Edge on the 4^th of July.

Kurt Angle/Luther Reigns vs. Big Show/Eddie Guerrero

Eddie and Angle start things off but it’s off to the power guys before any contact is made. Show shoves Reigns down but an Angle distraction lets Luther hammer away to very limited success. It’s back to Eddie to chop Reigns in the corner, followed by Three Amigos and a quick taunt to Angle. That’s enough to bring Angle in for a cheap shot and the villains take over for the first time.

Of course Angle is fine with going after Eddie on the mat but the threat of a Show right hand from the apron lets Eddie hit a quick hilo. Angle gets in his own suplex for two and the beating continues. The Angle Slam is countered with an armdrag though and Eddie nails a dropkick. Show comes back in for a chokeslam on Reigns but Angle breaks up a super frog splash.

Rating: C. It was your standard main event tag match until the pretty weak ending, though I can understand not jobbing Angle. What we got wasn’t bad though as Eddie is still one of the most popular faces on the show. Speaking of the show, the Big one is doing well enough as a face and is in the best shape I’ve seen him in in years, though the interest is probably limited.

Post match Jindrak takes out Eddie but Show gets his hands on him….so Angle whips out a tranquilizer dart gun and shoots Show in the back to make him wobble. Show tries to fight anyway but the dart sticking out of his back finally takes him down. With Show out, Jindrak runs to the back and comes back with scissors and hair clippers to leave Show bald, a look that he would have for the rest of his career. The haircut takes a long time to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Aside from the complete disaster that was Torrie and Dawn as schoolgirls (just go with it), this was a completely mediocre show with very little standing out and almost nothing I can remember by the ending. The show was completely watchable, but No Mercy is looking weaker and weaker by the show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: September 2, 2004
Location: ARCO Arena, Sacramento, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

This feels like the big non-PPV month edition of the show with a huge main event in the form of Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle in a 2/3 falls match, which should blow off their feud once and for all. Other than that we have more between JBL and Undertaker, which is likely going to give us a title rematch at whatever the next pay per view is going to be. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video focuses on Angle vs. Guerrero, as it certainly should. It really has been a great rivalry.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Booker T. for a chat. Booker is sick of everyone going around chanting CENA no matter where he is. Last week he tied to score in the series and we get a clip of the second match. That wasn’t it though, as Booker won the third match over the weekend, only needing a pull of the jean shorts to take the lead. Booker rhymes a bit but here’s Rey Mysterio to cut him off, giving us a great bugged out eye look.

Rey thinks Booker must be sick of the John Cena chants and might prefer the 619 version. A fight is teased but here’s Kenzo Suzuki to interrupt. Kenzo says 619 is an American area code and since Rey isn’t from America, he is a liar, liar, pants on fire. That’s not cool with Suzuki, who is a real American with a smile like Tom Cruise. Rob Van Dam comes in and jumps Suzuki, only to have Rene Dupree jump him to keep things even. Theodore Long comes out to make a six man tag for right now.

Booker T./Kenzo Suzuki/Rene Dupree vs. Rey Mysterio/Rob Van Dam/John Cena

Booker is in street clothes. We’re joined in progress with Cena planting Suzuki but a Booker distraction breaks up the Shuffle. It’s enough to allow Booker to come in and hammer away before handing it off to Dupree. That’s fine with Cena who ax handles him down and brings in the fresh Van Dam. Dupree gets kicked down and it’s time for an early standoff.

Booker comes back in for some more success but, possibly not being so comfortable wrestling in business casual, hands it back to Dupree for a chinlock. The hold lasts as long as you would expect as it’s off to Rey for the springboard spinning crossbody. Rey breaks up the French Tickler and Van Dam comes back in as everything breaks down. A 619 into Dropping the Dime finishes Dupree.

Rating: C-. Kind of a bland match but it was a better idea than the same singles matches that we’re going to see time after time. The problem here though is the villains, as neither Dupree or Suzuki are even remotely intimidating or imposing. Neither is a threat to Mysterio or Van Dam, meaning these matches aren’t the most enthralling.

We see the ending of Angle vs. Guerrero at Wrestlemania.

Long comes up to Paul Heyman in the back and wants to see Heidenreich. That’s not possible as Heidenreich is behind a locked door due to public safety. Long can dig that, but Heyman is personally responsible for Heidenreich’s actions. After attacking Josh Matthews last week, Heidenreich is being fined $5000, which is Heyman’s responsibility. Oh and no checks, as Heyman isn’t the most reliable when it comes to money. Heyman: “Holla holla holla to you too Mr. Long.”

We look back at Billy Kidman hitting the shooting star press on Chavo Guerrero last week with his knee hitting Chavo’s head. In unseen footage from last week, we see Chavo being tended to by medics. He was unconscious for five minutes and very hazy for twenty more.

Jamie Noble comes up to Kidman in the back, saying Kidman should be gone after what happened last week. Kidman thinks Jamie sounds afraid and doesn’t exactly seem apologetic.

Carlito Caribbean Cool is coming and you better be cool.

Billy Kidman/Paul London vs. FBI

Non-title and it’s Nunzio and Johnny Stamboli for the Italians. During their entrances, the FBI talks about how they’re a bit weary of the shooting star as well. Nunzio’s advice: don’t play dead or you’ll be dead. London wastes no time in kicking Nunzio out to the floor but everything breaks down in a hurry. We settle down to Johnny backdropping London with ease as Tazz explains why Johnny is called the Bull. Something about him being strong.

Rating: D+. I can certainly appreciate turning something that happened organically into a storyline, but this is the second time the champs have lost a non-title match to a very low level team. The division is hardly deep in the first place and having your champions, who work well together, lose to teams like this is a bad idea, especially so frequently.

Post match Kidman isn’t sure what to do but here’s Heidenreich to beat up both champs. Just in case they had something left in the tank. The beatdown goes on for a long time with Heyman having to come in and calm things down.

Long sends a referee to get Heidenreich because the fines are increasing. Torrie Wilson comes in to say she’s nervous about Big Show coming back. Does anyone remember that story? Long says this is a different Big Show, because he’s attended anger management. As you might guess, Torrie isn’t convinced.

Orlando Jordan vs. Charlie Haas

JBL, now without the halo, because you heal faster after having one of those ripped off before you get beaten up, is out for commentary. Haas takes him down without much effort but the referee rather annoyingly walks between them, allowing Jordan to spear him down. Jordan unhooks a turnbuckle pad before going with a kick to Haas’ ribs. Haas ducks a high crossbody and gets caught in a high collar suplex for two. Jordan gets desperate and goes for the turnbuckle, sending Haas into the exposed steal. A neckbreaker (kind of a reverse Twist of Fate) finishes Haas.

Rating: D. You have to establish Jordan as the lackey but that wasn’t exactly the most thrilling way to do it. Then again, nothing about Jordan has ever been described as thrilling and that was on full display here. At some point, the lack of talent is going to catch up with you and that’s the case with Jordan. He’s just not very good and there’s no way around it.

Post match Jordan distracts the referee so JBL can hit the Clothesline.

Ivory, Linda McMahon and Big Show are at the Republican National Convention. Show could not look less interested if he tried in the most entertaining part of the night.

Dudley Boyz vs. Hardcore Holly/Billy Gunn

Spike is here with Bubba and D-Von and slaps Holly before the bell. It doesn’t seem to matter as Gunn shoulders D-Von down to take over early on. Bubba offers a trip though and D-Von nails a quick clothesline. Some elbow drops get two but Gunn gets in an elbow of his own, allowing the hot tag to Holly.

The crowd reaction is about what you would expect but Holly plows ahead anyway. Everything breaks down and Spike pulls D-Von out of the way of a charge. Bubba charges into an elbow in the corner and gets caught with a top rope bulldog, only to have Spike come in with a title shot to the head, giving Bubba the easy pin.

Rating: D. And that’s Gunn’s last match in WWE for over eight years. I know he got a very nice midcard push at one point, but how far can you go with a name and theme song of Mr. A**? The answer would be a lot higher than expected, but there’s only so much you can do with what he had. He certainly had a great career, especially in tag team wrestling, and the Hall of Fame induction is coming one day. I was never much of a fan though and watching him back after the Attitude Era hasn’t been a lot of fun. Gunn did well for himself, but he must have a headache from hitting that ceiling so hard.

Clip of the end of Guerrero vs. Angle from Summerslam.

Carlito is still coming. Nothing has changed in the last thirty five minutes. At least it’s a different vignette, but it doesn’t hide the fact that he’s a weaker version of Razor Ramon.

Raw Rebound.

Smackdown Throwback: Big Show and Brock Lesnar break the ring. I know it’s been done again since but that’s still an incredible sight.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle

2/3 falls. They go with the amateur grappling to start with Angle naturally getting the better of things. Eddie spins out of a front facelock and we get the first of what will likely be multiple standoffs. Angle goes with an armbar so Eddie picks the ankle for the break. The technical stuff continues with Angle grabbing a headlock, plus a handful of hair for a bonus. Back up and Eddie grabs a headlock but this time grabs the singlet to match the cheating move for move.

Angle isn’t happy so Eddie grabs it again to start setting in the frustration. He is however smart enough to take the singlet down, causing Cole to dub this a chess match. Tazz: “You take your clothes off when you play chess?” Angle gets his singlet pulled down and it’s time to take a breather as Eddie lays across the top rope. Back in and Eddie dances a bit before grabbing a waistlock, only to have Angle get in a clandestine low blow to take over. Eddie kicks him low right back, earning himself a DQ for the first fall.

We take a break and come back with Angle getting two off a suplex. Angle slaps on the waistlock until Eddie suplexes his way to freedom. You don’t suplex with Angle though as a belly to belly takes Eddie right back down for two. The chinlock goes on (with Angle ripping at the face like a villain should) for a bit before Angle rolls the German suplexes. The Angle Slam is loaded up but Eddie reverses into a rollup to tie things up in a hurry.

We take another break and come back with Eddie caught in another waistlock. Eddie snaps up and hits a hurricanrana but can’t follow up. Angle’s right hand just fires Eddie up and the comeback is on. The first Amigo is countered into a German suplex but the Angle Slam is countered into a DDT. Eddie goes up for the frog splash and of course it’s Angle running the corner for the belly to belly superplex.

Yet another German suplex is countered into a roll into the buckle, allowing Eddie to hit Three Amigos this time around. Cue Luther Reigns to distract Eddie from the frog splash though, allowing Angle to roll out of the way. Another Angle Slam sets up the ankle lock (first time in the match), which Eddie rolls through into a ref bump. Instead of doing the smart thing though, Eddie dives onto Reigns and grabs a chair.

Some weak shots abound, setting up Eddie laying down and throwing the chair to Angle. Naturally the referee sees it and yells as Eddie lays on his side and waves before dropping back down. That’s such an easy joke but Eddie makes it work. The referee keeps yelling so Reigns chairs Eddie in the knee, setting up the ankle lock for the tap.

Rating: B. It’s good and something close to a greatest hits collection, but it really didn’t hit the top gear that you might have expected. The match wasn’t quite a classic but what we got was very good. It looked rather crisp and it was so nice to have Angle hold out on the ankle lock until the end. Thirty minutes at this level is nothing to sneeze at and Eddie even has a door open for one more match if necessary. It’s a fitting end to the feud as they called back to previous matches and had a good match of their own right here.

Post match Reigns lays Eddie out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The main event is certainly good, but the rest of the show was a great example of how boring things can be around here right now. The tag division in particular looked awful and there isn’t much aside from Eddie vs. Angle and Booker vs. Cena, which isn’t enough to carry the show week to week. It’s enough this week, but I don’t think they can count on thirty minutes from Angle and Eddie every single time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: August 26, 2004
Location: Save Mart Center, Fresno, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’ll wrap up the Smackdown half of the month here and that’s not the worst thing in the world. The big match this week will see john Cena face Booker T. in the second match in the best of five series for the US Title. Other than that we have the very injured JBL running from the Undertaker and Eddie Guerrero wanting one more match with Kurt Angle. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Rey Mysterio saving Eddie Guerrero from Kurt Angle and Luther Reigns, setting up last week’s tag match main event. Angle pouring paint on the low rider to end the show was a great touch.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Eddie to get things going. Last week, Angle defaced his personal property so this week, Eddie is going to deface him. That means Eddie wants a fight but he gets Luther Reigns instead. Reigns has seen a lot of fights in his day from prisons to bars, and he knows that Angle would annihilate him. Eddie is ready to fight anyway but Angle pops up on screen to say come to the parking lot.

The chase is on and Angle hides behind what he says is his car. Eddie pours trash on it and smashes the windows with a pipe but Reigns runs in from behind and beats him down. They get in another car and speed away, leaving Eddie to beat up the car a little more. Theodore Long comes up and says it’s his car. Eddie’s look makes up for any problems this might have had. Security takes Eddie away as Long cries over the car. Alas, no Final Fight reenactment.

Kenzo Suzuki vs. Rob Van Dam

Fallout from last week when Kenzo beat Van Dam down after a match. Before the match, Kenzo brags about Japanese cars before saying he loves America. Van Dam kicks him off the throne and starts beating up the people who carried it in. American jerk. Back in and Kenzo shoulders him down at the opening bell to take over.

The abdominal stretch goes on for a bit until Rob slips out and fires off some kicks. The top rope kick to the face gives Rob two and the split legged moonsault is good for the same as Rob finally changes up the offense a bit. It’s time for the Five Star but Rob has to dive onto an invading Rene Dupree. Not that it matters as a small package finishes Suzuki.

Rating: D. What were you expecting here? It’s very clear that Suzuki is already a lost cause and while Rene is better, he’s not exactly an upgrade as a partner. Van Dam hasn’t had trouble beating either of these goons and whoever he finds as a partner shouldn’t have any issue either.

Post match Dupree and Suzuki beat Rob down and show each other respect. Yeah it’s still not interesting.

Long is still crying over his car and talking about how it was a classic and all he had. JBL and Orlando Jordan come up and yell about Long ignoring them all week. They want something done about Undertaker because this is an unsafe working environment. Long makes a title match for tonight against Undertaker but since JBL can’t wrestle, Jordan can defend it for him. So now his future depends on Orlando Jordan. Just give up now man.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Billy Kidman

Jamie Noble and Paul London are at ringside. Kidman isn’t having this feeling out process and snaps off an early hurricanrana. Chavo gets in a few shots of his own to take over and it’s an armbar to keep him in trouble. That goes nowhere so Kidman fights up with a backdrop and a clothesline. The BK Bomb doesn’t work due to the bad arm so Kidman kicks him in the head instead. Noble breaks up the shooting star so London takes him out and kicks Chavo in the head. That’s enough for Kidman to hit the shooting star for the pin.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have time to get very far but the Tag Team Title match should be fun. The problem is the champs aren’t exactly lighting the world on fire and no one buys the challengers as a serious threat. There’s no division at the moment and that’s not likely to get better anytime soon.

Carlito Caribbean Cool vignette, this time showing him for the first time. The apple spit and catchphrase make their debuts as well.

Long is STILL devastated over his car when Angle and Reigns return. Angle doesn’t care about the car and gets a 2/3 falls match with Eddie next week. As for tonight, he can face Rey Mysterio. Dang Long is on fire and he makes Luther sweep up the mess as a bonus.

John Cena vs. Booker T.

Match #2 in the best of 5 series with Cena up 1-0. Booker starts fast by forearming him down and a suplex gets two. Cena is right back with an elbow of his own but Booker hits a superkick. The chinlock goes on early until Booker knees him in the back, followed by a missile dropkick for two. Another kick to the face gets another two and it’s already off to the second chinlock.

Booker switches it up to a double arm crank before getting two more off a spinebuster. This has been almost all Booker and the comeback can come anytime now. We hit another chinlock for another little while until Cena pops back to live with shoulders. The Shuffle connects for two but Booker sends him face first into the buckle. That and a backslide with feet on the ropes ties the series up.

Rating: D+. If there was a rating between D and D+, I’d go with that for this one. It was a lot of laying around in chinlocks and while it wasn’t the worst, it wasn’t thrilling. To be fair though, it’s the second of what is likely to be five matches so you can only get so annoyed at what they’re doing. Not the worst, but it felt like they were holding back/saving stuff for later. Understandable, but not really thrilling.

Match #3 will be taking place in Australia over the weekend at a house show. Good idea actually.

Paul Heyman is in the ring and introduces the new reason for his supreme confidence: Heidenreich. They get right to the point with Heidenreich saying he’s more than just hype and beating the heck out of Josh Matthews, including a shoulder breaker and a cobra clutch. Anything that involves Josh being hurt is a good thing for me.

Big Show is coming back.

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

It’s worked before so this should be fine. Angle takes him down without much effort to start, which tends to be the case. Rey is back up with an armdrag and it’s time to mock Angle’s pose. You know that makes it serious but Angle charges into another headlock and the early frustration is setting in. Rey headscissors him outside for a baseball slide and we take a break. Back with Rey caught in a chinlock, as tends to be the case when you come back from a break around here. At least Angle has a knee in the back to keep things fresh.

An overhead belly to belly makes things even worse and it’s off to a bearhug, with Angle dropping to a knee to deal with the height. A release German suplex gives Angle two more so Rey pops back up with a dropkick. The 619 connects but the West Coast Pop is countered into a powerbomb for two. The Angle Slam is countered into an inverted DDT for a heck of a near fall so Rey tries a victory roll. Angle has been studying his Owen Hart though as he sits down on it for the pin.

Rating: B. Well of course these two had a good match. They’ve always had solid chemistry together and this was no exception. Angle winning clean over a guy who wrestles a similar style as Eddie Guerrero is a good way to set up next week’s 2/3 falls. It’s also not like a loss to Angle hurts Mysterio very much, especially when Mysterio isn’t doing anything at the moment anyway.

Smackdown flashback: Arnold Schwarzenegger beats up HHH.

Raw Rebound.

JBL gives Jordan a pep talk and isn’t exactly thrilled with the prospects. Jordan wants to wear the title and that’s shot down as fast as you might guess.

Smackdown World Title: Orlando Jordan vs. Undertaker

Jordan is defending in JBL’s place. He also gets to hold the title in what feels like fan fiction gone mad. Undertaker’s entrance gives us a hilarious visual of JBL, with the cowboy hat on top of the halo, turning to look and looking into the camera in the process with his eyes bugging out. Jordan tries slugging away and gets his head kicked off for two. Old School connects in a hurry and the jumping clothesline gets two. A JBL distraction lets Jordan get in his first major offense, because it’s not like he can do it himself.

Back in and some right hands stagger Jordan but Undertaker goes after JBL again. The results are the same this time around and Jordan gets two off a Downward Spiral. That just makes Undertaker sit up though and it’s time for the proper beating to begin. A right hand knocks JBL off the apron and there’s the Tombstone, but JBL pulls the referee out for the DQ.

Rating: D+. All things considered, this wasn’t the worst thing in the world. I don’t think anyone was expecting anything other than JBL interfering for the DQ and it’s not a bad thing to go with the obvious. Jordan still isn’t anything more than a warm body who isn’t any good in the ring, but he serves a purpose here. Not a terrible match, but an exercise in killing time.

Post match Undertaker beats up JBL, ripping the braces off and hitting a chokeslam. Undertaker poses with the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. It’s hard to put into words, but there’s something about Smackdown that feels so much more together than Raw. Over on Raw you get the big angles and stories and promos, but Smackdown tends to be more low key, allowing them to show things off a little bit better and let them develop. It might never get as big around here, but it also never feels as bogged down when a story is bad. You can go either way with that, but both are rather entertaining.

This was a great example of that kind of Smackdown and I had a good time with it, though it wasn’t the most interesting thing in the world. They’re building things up for the next few weeks and those stories sound interesting. If we can get some great action out of these stories (Eddie vs. Kurt seems like), it’s going to be easy to see Smackdown pulling ahead, though both shows are getting a little better.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: January 22, 2019
Location: Intrust Bank Arena, Wichita, Kansas
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

It’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble and as luck would have it, we’re getting a 2/3 falls match between Rey Mysterio and Almas (still not liking the new name). There are still some spots available in the Royal Rumble matches so maybe we’ll fill some of those in tonight. Hopefully some are left open though, as the surprises are always nice. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here’s Becky Lynch to open things up. She’s sick of hearing about everyone telling her about what the Man should be doing. The only thing the Man should be doing is main eventing Wrestlemania and slapping everyone on the way there. That includes Asuka, because Becky will do anything to get the title back. This brings out Asuka who shouts without a microphone but here’s Charlotte to interrupt as well. Charlotte says she’s winning the Rumble and coming for the title, allowing Asuka to jump Becky from behind. The fight is on with Becky throwing her over the announcers’ table, leaving Asuka screaming as Becky leaves.

Post break Becky and Asuka are being held apart in the back. Good angle advancement here as Asuka doesn’t get shaken too often.

Long recap of Naomi vs. Mandy Rose due to Mandy trying to steal Naomi’s husband Jimmy Uso.

Mandy Rose vs. Naomi

Naomi jumps her in the aisle to start and slaps Mandy straight out to the floor. We take a break less than thirty seconds into the match and come back with Naomi hammering away with forearms into a running hurricanrana. Sonya Deville offers a quick distraction though and Naomi gets posted for the pin at 5:58. Not enough shown to rate but this was nothing.

Rey Mysterio talks about winning the Royal Rumble for honor but tonight is about respect. Tonight, Zelina Vega is banned from ringside and it’s a fair fight.

The Miz vs. Cesaro

Cesaro starts with the power but Miz kicks the leg out and gets an early Figure Four. That’s broken up and they head outside for a staredown with the partners as we take a break. Back with Miz fighting out of a chinlock and hitting the running dropkicks/clothesline in the corner. Cesaro uppercuts him out of the air though and Sheamus gets in a cheap shot, setting up the Neutralizer for the pin at 5:50. Again not enough shown to rate, but it was didn’t go anywhere.

Post match the brawl is on with Shane getting in his usual shots that of course do damage to a multiple time World Champion. Sheamus shoves him off the top and into the barricade though and it’s a Brogue Kick to knock Shane silly. Miz covers him up and gets beaten down as well. The Bar lays Miz on the table and powerbombs Shane through both of them for a good visual. This was a nice beatdown segment, but it’s not enough to overcome my apathy every time Shane shows up on camera.

We look back at Samoa Joe beating up Mustafa Ali last week.

Ali is on the streets of Chicago and talks about patrolling them as a cop. One thing he learned in that time is that eyes don’t lie. When Samoa Joe was attacking him last week, Joe kept asking if Ali understood. Ali understood, but it was the eyes that told him that Joe thinks Ali is beneath him. Now Joe needs to look into his eyes and understand that Ali is telling the truth when he says he can beat Joe. More great stuff here, as Ali’s stuff stands out due to being very well put together and different.

Miz and Shane are still being helped up.

Here’s Vince McMahon to moderate a final discussion between AJ Styles and Daniel Bryan. Daniel won’t get in the ring though and complains about last week’s attack that saw him covered in concessions. Bryan uses his power for good, though AJ thinks he uses it to be a jackass. That sends Bryan into a mini rant about AJ exciting the fans but Bryan makes them think.

Bryan is the planet’s champion, not the people’s champion. AJ talks about Bryan’s change of mindset, which he sees as fickle. Bryan starts to quote Carl Sagan but Vince tells him to get in the ring. He won’t though, instead going on a rant against Vince’s generation being the biggest parasites ever. Then the people bow to him for it and trade Instagram likes while Vince and his generation ruin the world.

Vince tells him to shut up and get in the ring but if Vince wants a face to face, AJ is willing to make that happen. The fight is on outside until AJ throws him inside with Bryan hiding behind Vince. That’s enough to set up the running knee so Bryan can escape. Good segment here, though it took some time to get going.

R-Truth and Carmella talk about using their Royal Rumble wins for World Title shots. There’s no chance that Truth is going to use his win to ace Brock Lesnar because he doesn’t want to be sent to Sioux Falls City. Carmella says he can’t challenge for the Cruiserweight Title because of the weight limit and Truth walks off. Carmella walks over to Charlotte and gives her some advice about the tornado that is the Rumble, especially with her waiting at #30. Charlotte says Carmella should be the worried one.

This was really, really bad at the whole “no one talks like this” aspect, with Carmella saying “what about the Universal Champion Brock Lesnar” sounding cringe worthy. Anyone who watches this show knows who Brock is, and there are better ways to have Truth get the point across. Like: “Are you crazy? I’m not facing a suplex machine like Brock Lesnar! I don’t want to go to Sioux Falls City!” They’re already assuming that you know what Suplex City is, meaning you know who Lesnar is. Stop making this sound so bad.

Mustafa Ali vs. Samoa Joe

Joe throws him around to start and knocks Ali off the apron to send us to another early break. Back with Joe’s corner enziguri getting two and Ali not exactly making Joe nervous. We hit the neck crank for a bit until Ali fights up and nails Joe in the face for a double knockdown. They fight to the floor with Ali hammering away, followed by some superkicks back inside. The great tornado DDT gets two but the 054 is broken up and Ali grabs the Koquina Clutch. Ali taps at 8:02.

Rating: C+. Ali continues to have that Jeff Hardy underdog quality and that’s going to take him a long way. It’s not a bad thing to have him lose to a big, over star like Joe, who has to win something to keep him afloat these days. This was entertaining while it lasted, and the ending wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

Royal Rumble rundown.

New Day is preparing for the Rumble by watching some Kofi clips. They’re tired of being asked this question every year by every interview. Is Tony Chimmel going to ask them next? Here’s Tony Chimmel to ask them and get thrown out (Big E.: “Do you see Edge here???”). Kofi isn’t sure if he can figure out a big save this year but he has an idea. No hints though.

Rey Mysterio vs. Andrade

2/3 falls with Zelina Vega banned from ringside. Rey starts fast with a hurricanrana to the floor and we take an early break. Back with Rey hitting the springboard seated senton but Andrade dropkicks his springboard crossbody out of the air. Andrade sends him into the corner with the knee getting banged up, only to get caught up top. That’s fine with Andrade, who counters a hurricanrana into a super Batista Bomb for the first fall at 8:36.

Another big powerbomb gives Andrade two but Rey counters a third into a sick Canadian Destroyer (Andrade’s head hit hard) for the pin at 9:48. We’re tied up as we go to a break and come back with Rey sliding underneath the ropes into a powerbomb to send Andrade into the barricade. Back in and the West Coast Pop gives Rey two but the 619 is countered into an armbar over the ropes. Rey hurricanranas him to the floor but Almas moonsaults onto his feet, setting up a powerbomb into the post.

The hammerlock DDT connects for two back inside with Rey having to use the ropes for the break. A Fujiwara armbar has Rey in more trouble but Rey fights up and tries a springboard….I think into a rollup but they botch the landing with Rey going into a regular rollup instead. Rey gets two more off a reverse hurricanrana and the 619 takes Andrade down again. Cue Samoa Joe to break up another springboard with an apron powerbomb for the DQ at 23:15.

Rating: B. Oh man they were rolling there until the (slightly necessary) interference ending. I get that you don’t want either jobbing but my goodness they were on their way to something special. Andrade is getting somewhere with this new intensity, though having the matches be against Mysterio isn’t hurting things.

Post match Joe chokes Rey out and says that he’s doing the same thing to everyone on Sunday. As he’s talking, Randy Orton runs in for the surprise RKO (that always looks cool) and poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This one is going to depend on how you looked at it. The wrestling and story advancement were good and as a regular show this was one of the better shows in a few months. However, as a go home show it has some flaws with the US Title match receiving no time and the Shane/Miz beatdown going on too long. What we got was very good though and it was a breeze to watch. The Rumble is looking good, especially if they space things out well enough.

Results

Mandy Rose b. Naomi – Mandy sent her into the post

Cesaro b. The Miz – Neutralizer

Samoa Joe b. Mustafa Ali – Koquina Clutch

Rey Mysterio b. Andrade via DQ when Randy Orton interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: August 19, 2004
Location: Copps Coliseum, Hamilton, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

The Canadian adventure continues as JBL is still Smackdown World Champion and likely in line to continue feuding with the Undertaker. I’m sure you’re as thrilled as I am. Other than that Kurt Angle pinned Eddie Guerrero in a match that should set up a third match to settle things for good, though you never know with them. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s the limo to open things up with Orlando Jordan helping JBL out. This gives us one of my all time favorite visuals, with JBL wearing a halo around his neck with the cowboy hat sitting on top, above JBL’s head. The entrance takes forever as JBL can barely walk but he eventually (and very slowly) says he’s in tremendous pain. All the booing from these inferior Canadians are hurting his head but it’s ok if they want to chant JBL.

He won at Summerslam though and just like Martin Luther King, he had a dream. At his Hall of Fame induction, he wanted a clip of himself pinning Undertaker to introduce his speech. It wasn’t fair that Undertaker got himself disqualified so he didn’t have to pass the torch to JBL. We see some stills of the beatdown from Sunday (JBL: “Why are you people cheering that?”), which takes a lot of time as well.

JBL remembers seeing Undertaker’s evil face before passing out, which the fans seem to enjoy. After a quick rant about the American army protecting Canada, JBL says Undertaker will NOT be getting a rematch. This brings out Undertaker so JBL takes another minute or so to get out of the ring as he sells the heck out of those injuries. As JBL stumbles over a fan, Undertaker holds up the title because there MUST be a rematch.

It’s far better when JBL is played this way instead of bragging about everything he’s done over the years, which was just boring. This is actually entertaining and if we see more like this, he’s downright tolerable. It ran about fifteen minutes, but JBL selling his injuries made it worth the time.

Cruiserweight Title: Spike Dudley vs. Scotty 2 Hotty

Spike is defending and has Bubba and D-Von with him. Scotty starts fast with some slams into an armbar, followed by a backdrop onto the other Dudleys. D-Von gets up and offers a distraction so Bubba can break up the Worm. The top rope double stomp is blocked by a raised boot and the very quick comeback is on. Bubba has to make a save after a superkick and the Dudley Dog retains the title.

Rating: D. We’re never going to get an explanation of why Bubba and D-Von are listening to Spike are we? It’s not the most interesting story in the first place and I don’t see it getting any better. The fact that it took all three to deal with Scotty 2 Hotty should tell you everything you need to know about the legs this story has.

Carlito Caribbean Cool is coming.

Raw Rebound.

As the announcers talk, two guys come up with a HEIDENREICH NEXT WEEK banner.

John Cena (in a Wrestlemania inspired Word Life shirt) promises to go up 2-0 on Booker T. next week. Spike Dudley comes in and doesn’t like the idea of Cena calling himself a champ. Cena says it looks like Dennis the Menace finally grew up. Now Spike needs some glasses though because he can’t see Cena. Bubba and D-Von come in for the beatdown.

Billy Kidman/Paul London vs. Chavo Guerrero/Jamie Noble

Non-title. Noble and London start things off with Paul’s front facelock not getting him very far. London gets thrown to the apron but slingshots back in with a headscissors, only to get his head clotheslined off. It’s off to Chavo for a front facelock of his own as the villains take over. Chavo hits a slingshot legdrop for two but London gets to his feet for a double knockdown. That’s enough for the hot tag to Kidman so house can really be cleaned. Everything breaks down and it’s a BK Bomb to Chavo, followed by a sunset flip but Jamie pulls Chavo on top. A grab of the rope is enough for the pin on Kidman.

Rating: C. Not too bad here, though I’m not sure on having the Tag Team Champions lose on Sunday and then lose again on Thursday. They aren’t the strongest champions in the world in the first place and it doesn’t seem like a great idea to have them lose twice in a row like this. Noble and Guerrero aren’t winning the titles so did you really need to do this on two straight shows?

Teddy Long sends Brian Hebner to tell John Cena that he’ll be facing a Dudley later tonight.

Here’s a disappointed Eddie Guerrero for a chat. He calls Kurt Angle out because we haven’t really determined the better man. This brings out Angle, who thinks Eddie is nuts for wanting to do this again. Angle is looking for action though and Eddie likes that idea, but Angle says no. Eddie says they’ve done this twice and are 1-1, so we need a rubber match. It’s true that Angle outwrestled him and no one has ever done it to him like that in his career.

Eddie wants Angle to shake his hand but Angle doesn’t buy it. Some persuasion gets Angle inside and Eddie says he’s telling the truth…..before punching him in the face. Luther Reigns comes out for the save until Rey Mysterio runs out to even things up. Eddie lying after convincing Angle that he’s telling the truth still works. It’s like Ric Flair turning on Sting back in 1995. You know exactly where it’s going but it’s still fun to watch because you want to see these people act like they’re supposed to.

John Cena vs. D-Von Dudley

Booker T. is on commentary. D-Von hammers away in the corner to start but Cena is right back with a hiptoss. They slug it out some more with D-Von elbowing him in the face for two more. A splash misses in the corner and Cena scores with a backdrop. Cena slugs away, knocks Bubba off the apron, and hits an AA (Booker: “NO! NO!”) for the fast pin.

Post match Cena says Booker has something of his, and next week they’re having the second match in their series.

Video on the debut episode of Smackdown, just shy of five years ago.

Rob Van Dam vs. Rene Dupree

Rematch from Sunday’s Heat match. They fight over a wristlock to start as the announcers talk about the wrestling history in this building. Van Dam kicks him down but misses the flip legdrop to give us a standoff. The corner shoulders and a monkey flip sends Rene down but he’s able to send Van Dam shoulder first into the post. An armbar keeps Van Dam in trouble as a pull of the hair gives Rene two.

The armbar goes on again as the announcers talk about underwater basket weaving and synchronized swimming. Rob pops up with a superkick and a bridging German suplex for two. Rolling Thunder hits raised knees and a good looking superplex keeps Van Dam’s back in trouble. Rob is fine enough to kick him in the face and hit the Five Star for the pin.

Rating: C. Not too bad here and one of Rene’s best matches to date. They kept it short and Rene’s offense, especially that superplex, looked rather sharp. Van Dam isn’t about to lose to Dupree, whose status is starting to fade fast. Rob might not be the top star in the company, but he’s still ahead of Dupree.

Post match Kenzo Suzuki comes in and lays out Van Dam. It still doesn’t make him interesting.

Theodore Long gives a tape to a production worker, followed by some holla holla holla lessons. This was oddly creepy with Long flirting with the production woman.

The $1 Million Tough Enough is coming. There’s someone involved in that and he’s awesome.

Long is in the ring and has a major announcement: he’s rehired the Big Show. As a bonus, he introduces the main event.

Kurt Angle/Luther Reigns vs. Eddie Guerrero/Rey Mysterio

Rey dropkicks Luther to start and it’s Eddie coming in for a suplex. It’s already back to Rey, whose crossbody is countered into a backbreaker to change control in a hurry. Angle gets two off a clothesline and it’s off to a chinlock. The impatient Eddie breaks that up in a hurry so Rey snaps off a headscissors. The hot tag brings in Eddie and Angle hides in the corner like a true coward.

Angle starts in on the ankle and knocks him to the floor as we take a break. Back with Angle grabbing the ankle lock but Eddie rolls out in a hurry. Another leglock keeps Angle in control until a quick rollup gives Eddie two and a break. Reigns comes back in for a hold of his own and tags Angle after getting kicked away. That’s fine with Kurt, who cuts Eddie’s trip to the corner off with an overhead belly to belly. Eddie breaks up another suplex attempt and now it’s the hot tag to Rey so the pace can pick up.

A springboard seated senton gets two on Angle but the hurricanrana to Reigns takes bumps the referee. The 619 around the post knocks Angle silly and Reigns is knocked into position as well. Angle is back up with a chair to Rey’s knee though, sending Eddie after Angle with a chair of his own. With Angle gone, a low blow drops Reigns and it’s the Three Amigos into the 619 into the frog splash for the pin.

Rating: C+. Eddie and Rey were always fun to see together and that was the case again here. They gel together so smoothly and that was the case here. Reigns was kept to a minimum here and that’s the right idea for a match like this. Let the three masters do their thing and have him come in for the power stuff. That’s all it should be and it worked fine here, even if the match followed a pretty simple formula.

Post match Eddie and Rey celebrate the win but here’s Angle to pour paint on the low rider. Eddie is distraught to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Other than the hilarious JBL image, there wasn’t a lot going on with this one. There was some average at best wrestling and storyline advancement that feels like we’re just heading to rematches either on television or at No Mercy. The Smackdown half of Summerslam was only so good in the first place so this isn’t the most thrilling show in the world. Not terrible, but not exactly exciting.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Royal Rumble 2010
Date: January 31, 2010
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 16,697
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker

The opening video is about the Road to Wrestlemania is beginning and how it determines what happens for months to come. This is called the most star studded Rumble ever, which is a tagline that has been used before.

ECW Title: Christian vs. Ezekiel Jackson

The springboard plancha takes Jackson out and we head back in. Christian finally gets caught in the corner and pounded on before having the Killswitch easily blocked. Instead Christian chokes away on the ropes and hits another shot to the face. Jackson throws Christian to the floor where Regal tries to throw him back in, earning himself an ejection. Off to a neck crank back inside which Jackson picks up into a kind of cobra clutch slam for two.

US Title: The Miz vs. MVP

After that eats up some time, MVP pounds away with all of his usual stuff. Ballin hits and a running boot to the side of the head gets two for the challenger. A big shoulder block gets the same for MVP but he misses a running boot in the corner. MVP grabs three straight quick near falls but gets caught in a small package for the pin to keep the title on Miz.

Post match MVP hits the Playmaker on Miz and gets booed LOUDLY. He lost completely clean so the booing is deserved.

The National Guard is here.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Post match Orton snaps on Cody as DiBiase comes down to save his partner. While Orton yells at Cody in the corner, Sheamus comes back in and lays out Randy with a Brogue Kick.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Undertaker

Rey fires off some shots in the corner before Taker grabs him by the neck and throws him up and over the top and out to the floor. That looked awesome. Back to the apron and Rey fires off strikes to the face, only to get punched right back down to the floor by a single shot. Taker misses the legdrop on the apron but hits it the second time before heading back in. Rey counters a chokeslam into the 619 but Taker easily grabs the legs. Tombstone is countered and Taker misses an elbow drop.

Rumble by the Numbers time:

23 Winners

627 entrants eliminated

36 eliminations by Austin

11 eliminations by Kane in 2001

2002 was the last Rumble in Atlanta

62:12 Rey was in the Rumble in 2006

2 seconds was the record for 20 years until Santino broke it last year

3 wins for Austin

2 win for #1, the same as #30

70% of the winners win at Mania

Royal Rumble

Rhodes is #13 and saves Ted as he comes in. Morrison is sent to the apron and springboards back in, only to get dropkicked out of the air. Legacy goes after Kane but HHH saves him for no apparent reason. Cody saves himself from being eliminated and MVP is #14. Miz runs up behind him though and blasts MVP with the US Title. Morrison hits the Moonlight Drive on McIntyre to break up the Future Shock on Kane. HHH is in trouble in the corner and MVP is carried to the back.

HHH starts laying out everyone and Shawn is #18. Carlito is backdropped out, Rhodes and DiBiase are tossed, Morrison gets dumped, and DX puts out McIntyre to get us down to DX. Before anything can happen though, Cena is #19 to get us to the final third of the match. Cena cleans house and hits a double Shuffle before getting caught in the Pedigree. Out of nowhere Shawn superkicks HHH out to pop the crowd BIG.

Ratings Comparison

Christian vs. Ezekiel Jackson

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Miz vs. MVP

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

Redo: D+

Mickie James vs. Michelle McCool

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Undertaker vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: C-

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: A

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: B

Dang I liked Sheamus a lot more than I thought I did.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/29/royal-rumble-count-up-2010-one-of-the-best-ever/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Royal Rumble 2008
Date: January 27, 2008
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City New York
Attendance: 20,798
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole Jonathan Coachman, Joey Styles, Tazz

This was the other request so let’s throw up a triple shot this year. The big story here is Jeff Hardy challenging Randy Orton for the Raw World Title. This was set up incredibly well with Hardy being set up as the ultimate underdog who might be able to pull off the miracle. The fans believe in him and it’s an absolutely incredible build that had me dying to see what they did. Let’s get to it.

The opening video features a bunch of wrestlers getting on a subway before going into a history of the Rumble. This year’s show gets some time as well and we cut to a fight in the subway, because wrestlers are going to wrestle.

I love the MSG setup with the entrance opposite the hard camera. It’s the only major arena to do that and it feels special.

Ric Flair vs. MVP

MVP’s US Title isn’t on the line. This was during the “if Flair loses he retires” period and MVP wanted to take him out for good, as did so many others. Before the match, Flair talks about how important this arena is and how he first wrestled here in March 1976. MVP’s entrance cuts off a rather nice speech because MVP is a rather good jerk. MVP easily takes him down and strikes a pose but Flair just WOOs at him.

Back up and Flair takes him into the corner for the chops and punches, including a big chop to put MVP down. That’s about it for the offense though as MVP kicks him in the face and gets two off a neckbreaker. Cole says he’s sure that there are fans here who were here for Flair’s first match. Really? A fan who is there for two shows 32 years apart? That’s a bit of a stretch, but Cole never was all that logical. Flair comes back with a quick Figure Four attempt but gets small packaged for two instead.

Another running boot in the corner (Helluva Kick) gives MVP three….with Flair’s foot on the rope. You know Little Naitch is thrilled to be able to say Flair gets to keep going. A superplex gives MVP two more but Flair gets in a clothesline out of the corner for a breather. Flair grabs a rollup and backslide for two each and it’s time for stylin and profilin. The Playmaker is countered into the Figure Four and MVP taps out clean.

Rating: C. Perfectly watchable match here and I can even forgive the US Champion doing a clean job for the sake of what is likely Flair’s last match in the Garden. I didn’t care for this whole story at first but it’s grown on me a bit over time. Flair deserves this kind of goodbye and his matches were still perfectly watchable at this point. Not too bad here, and a great feel good moment to ope the show.

Flair gets the big standing ovation that you knew was coming.

Hornswoggle, Vince McMahon’s son at this point in a story that is still so bizarre and gets worse every time, is in Vince’s office. Vince gives him a history of the McMahon Family in the Garden. Tonight it’s every man for himself and you can’t even trust your own family. Finlay comes in and Hornswoggle is rather happy to see him. Vince tells Finlay not to trust Hornswoggle, who jumps into Finlay’s arms as they leave. I’m still not sure if they know how old Hornswoggle is supposed to be here. That was never quite clear.

We meet new correspondent Mike Adamle, who actually doesn’t screw anything up! Yet.

We recap JBL vs. Chris Jericho. JBL had been doing commentary on Jericho’s World Title shot and got knocked down so he cost Jericho the match. The feud ensued with JBL even yelling about Jericho’s family. It’s time for the fight as Jericho continues to try to click in his return.

Chris Jericho vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Ah the days of a ton of pyro for a midcard match entrance. They shove each other around to start with JBL hiding in the corner and the ropes. The second break is enough for JBL to get in a few right hands so Jericho takes him down for some of his own. The early Walls are broken up by a grab of the rope and JBL drops him throat first (the throat/neck that was damaged in the buildup) onto the top rope.

A standing Clothesline From JBL gets two and he catapults the throat into the middle rope to make it even worse. We hit the sleeper to stay on Jericho’s neck until Jericho slips out and hits a clothesline of his own. JBL is fine enough to send him shoulder first into the post and Jericho is busted open. Back in and JBL stomps away as the blood is starting to flow. They fight to the floor again and Jericho BLASTS him with a chair to the head for the DQ. Kind of a sudden finish but that sounded amazing.

Rating: D+. This really didn’t work as JBL can’t do much and Jericho didn’t exactly do much other than throw punches. Jericho is already in need of a heel turn as the face push isn’t exactly working. Maybe it’s the lack of hair or just rust but it’s not exactly clicking here. Then again Jericho is known for being able to change things up at the drop of a hat so I’m sure he’ll be fine.

Post match Jericho beats the heck out of JBL and chokes him with the television cable.

Ashley Massaro tries to go see Maria but boyfriend Santino cuts her off. See, Maria is NOT interested in posing for Playboy, though the magazine had probably already been shot by this point. For the sake of modesty, we’ll move on.

We recap Edge vs. Rey Mysterio. Edge has used his relationship with Vickie Guerrero to become World Heavyweight Champion but Mysterio won a Beat the Clock Challenge (with the help of Batista and Undertaker) by pinning Edge on Smackdown. This earned Rey some beatings from Edge and the Edgeheads (Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder), because you have to have some lackeys.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Rey Mysterio

Edge is defending and has Vickie (in a wheelchair) and the Edgeheads out here with him. The fans actually boo Mysterio a bit and cheer loudly for Edge. Feeling out process to start with Edge slipping out of the corner to continue the staredown. Rey takes him down and gets two off a basement dropkick as the fans are relentless with the booing. Back up and Edge sends him outside for the quick beating from the Edgeheads. For once the referee isn’t an idiot and ejects him, allowing Rey to get two off a springboard seated senton.

Edge takes out the knee though in a smart move and Mysterio is right back in trouble. A kneeling half crab stays on the knee but Rey fights up and scores with an enziguri. The bad knee means the 619 is very slow though and Edge grabs a powerslam for two. Something close to an ankle lock keeps the leg in trouble and now it’s time to get series as Edge loosens the knee brace. That’s enough to wake Rey up for the sitout bulldog and another kick to the head (with the good leg) gets two.

Rey changes things up a bit with a top rope double stomp for two, followed by a hurricanrana to send Edge outside. The slide into the tornado DDT has Edge in even more trouble but he kicks Rey in the head to get a breather. Mysterio is right back with a drop toehold into the 619, which draws Vickie out of the wheelchair. The distraction means Rey has to hit another 619 so Vickie jumps up to take the blow. That’s enough for Edge to get up and spear a springboarding Rey out of the air for the pin to retain.

Rating: B. This was good, though it never got up to the level you would expect from these two. Edge retaining is far from a surprise and the ending worked really well, with Vickie showing her love for Edge, who likely doesn’t care because it’s all about the title. That spear out of the air was awesome too, meaning this was perfectly fine for a Royal Rumble title defense.

Mr. Kennedy gives Flair, in a towel, a slow clap and sounds like he wants to face Flair next but here’s Shawn Michaels to get rid of him. Shawn says a loud mouthed bleach blonde guy will never work as a gimmick today and Flair seems pleased. Batista and HHH come in with HHH telling Flair to put his pants on. Tensions are teased over who will win the Royal Rumble so Shawn turns it into a merch plug.

Here’s Maria for the Kiss Cam, which totally feels in place at the Royal Rumble. This is the excuse to bring out Ashley to ask about the Playboy shoot again. Cue Santino with someone under a blanket to say stop it. There will be no Playboy because no one wants to see Maria with no clothes on.

We hit the cheap New York sports teams suck heat and, after a LET’S GO GIANTS chant, the fans seem interested in having Maria in the magazine. Santino: “They would cheer for hepatitis if you asked them to!” Santino brings in the blanketed person and of course it’s Big Dick Johnson in Patriots (Giants opponent in next week’s Super Bowl) gear for some dancing. Ashley beats him up to conclude our comedy.

Wrestlemania ad with a Baywatch theme. Believe it or not, Kelly Kelly fits this perfectly.

Adamle throws us to the recap video for Randy Orton vs Jeff “Harvey” in a fairly infamous botch.

So this is the biggest match on the show, even bigger than the Royal Rumble. Apparently the buys went WAY up as a result of Hardy getting the shot and it’s one of the best builds I’ve ever seen. You might remember me saying that Mysterio was the challenger that had no chance of winning. Well Jeff is the polar opposite, as WWE has done a masterful job at making you believe that Hardy could win.

The idea is that Orton is the perfect wrestler but Hardy is willing to do anything to win and could actually pull it off. This included one dive after another to Orton and sweet goodness did they ever work. I COMPLETELY bought Jeff as a real challenger and a lot of other people did too. It didn’t make sense, but WWE managed to create something where you believed the impossible could happen and it was amazing. I still love the build to this and it’s one of the handful of best jobs I’ve ever seen them do.

Raw World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending and Jeff’s Intercontinental Title isn’t on the line. Dang I miss Burn In My Light as Orton’s theme. The fans are behind Hardy for the early lockup exchange and Jeff takes him down with a headlock. The legdrop between the legs into the basement dropkick gives Jeff two but Orton is right back with some forearms to the back. Orton to the crowd: “WHO’S YOUR BOY NOW???”

Jeff clotheslines him right back down and hits a heck of a dropkick through the ropes, leaving Orton’s head a bit crooked against the barricade. The first big dive takes Orton down and the fans believe it all over again. Back in and Orton hits a big dropkick to break up a springboard, which you had to know was coming sooner or later. There’s a suplex on the floor to give Orton two and it’s time to slowly stomp away. Back up and Jeff sends him over the top for a clothesline from the apron. Jeff takes him back inside but gets sent into the post, allowing Orton to throw on a chinlock.

Since it’s a big match though, he adds a grapevine for a bonus. The powerslam gives Orton two and we hit the chinlock for the second time in a minute. Jeff fights up again and hits the Whisper in the Wind, followed by the slingshot dropkick in the corner. It’s too early for the Swanton so Jeff settles for a missile dropkick to knock him off the apron instead. Jeff’s moonsault to the floor barely makes contact and they’re both down. Back in and Jeff tries the Twist of Fate but gets countered into the RKO for the pin to retain.

Rating: B-. It was good, but without a title change (which didn’t need to happen yet) there was no way they could live up to the hype that had been built. Hardy got in some dives but there was only so much you can do when you’re not winning the title. They NAILED the build and the match itself was fine, but it was a little deflating. Jeff certainly moved up a few levels though and that’s what matters most.

Jeff gets the standing ovation, but it’s not the strongest in the world.

Rumble By The Numbers:

21 Winners

569 Wrestlers Eliminated

36 Eliminations for Steve Austin, the most ever

11 Royal Rumbles for Shawn Michaels, the most ever

11 Eliminations for Kane, the most in one match

10 Consecutive Royal Rumbles for Kane

3 Times Mick Foley entered in 1998

2 Feet that need to hit the ground for an elimination

1 Woman to have entered, with Chyna

62:12 for Rey Mysterio in 2006, the most ever

:02 For Warlord in 1990, the least ever

3 Wins for Steve Austin, the most ever

#1 Spot, which has produced more winners than #30

1 Winner from #30, the Undertaker in 2007

4 Winners from #27, the most of all time

73% Success rate for winners at Wrestlemania

1 Road to Wrestlemania

Royal Rumble

Michael Buffer of all people gets to do the intro, which is a very WCW thing to do, though that voice is hard to turn down. There are ninety second intervals this year so things are going to be moving. Undertaker is in at #1 and Shawn Michaels is in at #2, with Buffer just calling him the Heartbreak Kid and never mentioning his name. Shawn (or Heartbreak) chops away in the corner to start but gets grabbed by the throat and sent into the corner for his efforts. Undertaker misses a running boot though and gets sent out to the apron. He’s fine enough to grab Shawn by the throat and hit a big boot as Santino Marella is in at #3.

Death comes quickly as Shawn superkicks him and Undertaker gets the elimination in less than thirty seconds. Shawn goes to throw Undertaker out and that’s just not bright. Old School is broken up with a pull off the top but Undertaker hits a chokeslam as Great Khali is in at #4. The fans immediately start the YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chants as Undertaker and Khali slug it out. The big chop is blocked though and Undertaker throws him out to get us back down to two. Hardcore Holly is in at #5 and might have some more staying power.

Undertaker and Shawn take turns knocking him down until Holly gets in a cheap shot on Undertaker to knock him into the ropes. Shawn and Holly chop it out in the corner until John Morrison is in at #6. As Coach talks about Morrison and Miz spending all night partying, Shawn throws Morrison off the top and hits the top rope elbow. It’s too early for Sweet Chin Music and Tommy Dreamer is in at #7, because WE NEED TOMMY DREAMER!!!

The traditional brawling around the ring begins with Dreamer pretending he has a chance to eliminate Undertaker. Batista is in at #8 and that keeps the crowd going even more. That gives us the big showdown with Undertaker but Dreamer (OF COURSE) breaks it up, thankfully getting eliminated. Batista spears Morrison but gets punched down in the corner by Undertaker.

Hornswoggle is in at #9 and immediately hides underneath the ring. Another spear takes Undertaker down and the brawling continues. Angry biker Chuck Palumbo is in at #10, giving us Undertaker, Shawn, Holly, Morrison, Batista, Hornswoggle and Palumbo. Morrison pulls himself back in from the apron as we get to the standard operating procedure of people trying to save themselves on the ropes. Jamie Noble, currently feuding with Palumbo and rather banged up, is in at #11 and slugs it out with Palumbo.

That’s good for an elimination in about thirty seconds to keep the ring from getting too full. CM Punk is in at #12 and you know the fans are going to be into him. A bunch of running knees have Punk on a roll and he throws Palumbo out. Cody Rhodes is in at #13 and a grand total of nothing happens. Well unless you count basic brawling and no one being close to an elimination. Umaga is in at #14 and knocks Holly out in a hurry to keep things balanced.

Snitsky is in at #15 (He was still around in 2008?) and the Big Bald starts cleaning house. Cody takes him to the apron but Punk can’t shove either of them out. As Cole says Morrison is like a young Shawn Michaels, Morrison’s partner Miz is in at #16. Undertaker puts Umaga on the apron but can’t stomp him out as Shelton Benjamin is in at #17. The jump to the top lets him knock Miz and Morrison to the apron, followed by Paydirt to Morrison.

That’s enough from Shelton though as Sweet Chin Music is good for an elimination. Well that works. I loved the original Shelton run but he never recovered from that Gold Standard nonsense. Jimmy Snuka of all people is in at #18 and the fans literally get to their feet for that one. Undertaker tries a headbutt and hurts himself in a little payback from Wrestlemania VII. The old man abuse stops….and Roddy Piper is in at #19 to blow away Snuka’s pop.

Piper and Snuka have the big showdown in slow motion (thankfully with Piper in shorts instead of trunks) and everyone stops to watch the fight. Things settle back down until Kane is in at #20 to get rid of Piper and Snuka, leaving us with Undertaker, Michaels, Morrison, Batista, Hornswoggle (still under the ring), Punk, Rhodes, Umaga, Snitsky, Miz and Kane. Undertaker loads up a chokeslam on Kane but goes after Michaels instead, with Kane making the save for some reason.

Carlito is in at #21 and spits the apple at Cody as there are too many people who have been around too long. A nice backflip gets Carlito out of trouble and it’s Mick Foley in at #22 to a very long and positive reaction. Batista takes the Last Ride and Foley hits a double arm DDT on Kane. There’s a Samoan drop from Umaga to Undertaker as the ring is way too full. Mr. Kennedy is in at #23 to make it even worse but Undertaker takes him down with a chokeslam. A lot of people are down as Undertaker starts hitting his running clotheslines in the corner.

Undertaker gets rid of Snitsky but walks into Sweet Chin Music for the big surprise elimination. Kennedy gets rid of Shawn immediately thereafter, all while Big Daddy V is in at #24. Undertaker beats up Snitsky to blow off some steam before leaving. We get some near eliminations with Cody and Kennedy fighting to the apron and Mark Henry is in at #25. Hornswoggle returns from the dead and pulls Miz out before heading right back underneath the ring. As Snitsky finally gets up to leave, V can’t get rid of Morrison or Kennedy. Chavo Guerrero is in at #26 and Kane kicks Morrison out.

Henry pulls the returning Hornswoggle inside so here’s Finlay to jump the gun at #27 to swing the shillelagh. He and Hornswoggle leave, with the explanation being that Finlay was disqualified for using the club and Hornswoggle was, uh, short? Finlay holds Hornswoggle’s hand on the way out, again acting like he’s about five. Elijah Burke is in at #28 and MY GOODNESS get rid of some people already. The Samoan Spike sends Batista underneath the ropes and outside for a breather.

Chavo gets rid of Punk and it’s HHH at #29 to hopefully eliminate half the field. Cody, Big Daddy V, Foley (nice slugout first) and Burke are all gone to make things way better. Umaga gets sent head first into the post and Pedigreed….and JOHN CENA is in at #30 to one of the all time great pops.

See, Cena had torn his pectoral muscle back in October and the word was he was going to miss Wrestlemania, if not the following Summerslam. WWE had this wild idea for Cena: use a combination of Cena’s uncanny ability to heal and recover in a crazy hurry and, of course, LIE. This is one of the best shocking returns ever because Cena had been completely written off for at least the next six months. The fans, as in the MSG fans, are STUNNED and pop the roof off the place before realizing that it’s Cena and they’re supposed to boo at him.

Cena starts cleaning house and gets rid of Carlito, Chavo and Henry to get us down to Cena, HHH, Umaga, Kane, Batista and Kennedy. We get the big showdown with Cena and HHH as the right hands start fast. HHH hits a spinebuster but walks into an uppercut from Umaga. Kane and Kennedy are dispatched in a hurry and it’s HHH and Batista teaming up to toss Umaga. That leaves us with three, which is a heck of a triple threat. Batista gives both of them the thumbs down and the fight is on with a double clothesline putting HHH and Cena down.

There’s the big spinebuster to both of them but Cena counters the Batista Bomb. A clothesline gets rid of Batista and we’re down to the major showdown, which the fans certainly enjoy. That means POINTING AT THE SIGN (take that Ronda) and they slug it out with the fans being behind Cena. HHH gets caught with Cena’s usual but it’s a double clothesline for the double knockdown. A DDT takes Cena down again but he counters another Pedigree attempt into the AA over the top for the win.

Rating: C+. This was a bumpy road as they didn’t pace things well, meaning the match was way too full for far too long. They had a nice balance of legends and modern stars though with those three New York pops being very well done. It’s not a great match or anything, but what we got worked.

Now, with that out of the way, this is ALL about Cena’s return with nothing else coming close. That’s the kind of ovation and reaction you only get once in a long time and my goodness did it work here. Cena being back changed everything and it was a great moment all around. Just watching that crowd of smarks lose their minds because they were actually surprised is an all time favorite of mine and it still works eleven years later.

Overall Rating: C. Kind of an awkward show as the whole big moment at the end doesn’t exactly make up for everything else. Now that being said, there’s nothing too bad or even bad at all, but nothing that stands out either. The Hardy vs. Orton match was all hype but still entertaining, while I’m already having trouble remembering the rest of the card. Cena’s return stole everything and that’s fine, as it wasn’t really a great show to start.

Ratings Comparison

Ric Flair vs. MVP

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C

2018 Redo: C

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Chris Jericho

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D+

2018 Redo: D+

Edge vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: A-

2013 Redo: C+

2018 Redo: B

Jeff Hardy vs. Randy Orton

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C+

2018 Redo: B-

Royal Rumble

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C+

2018 Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C-

2018 Redo: C

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/27/royal-rumble-count-up-2008-screw-wwes-list-this-is-the-1-rumble-moment/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/01/22/royal-rumble-count-up-2013-redo-2008-the-biggest-surprise-in-rumble-history/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: January 15, 2019
Location: Legacy Arena, Birmingham, Alabama
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

We’re getting rather close to the Rumble and that means it’s time to hammer home some final details before the pay per view. While I can’t imagine anything as big as last night’s change on Raw, there’s always the chance of something big happening. We also have Andrade Cien Almas vs. Rey Mysterio set for tonight, which should be fun. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Becky Lynch arrives and says everyone knows if she’s ready for Asuka. She’ll answer it in the ring though. She walks forward and sees Heavy Machinery making a pancake and egg shake as a disgusted New Day watches. Becky drinks it instead and says it’s a little weak. As I said a few weeks back: that’s a very Becky thing to say.

Here’s Becky to say how hard it is to run this division. That’s why Asuka isn’t here, because this is hard. There are people who say she’s all hype, but she delivers every single time. Now if you want to talk about hype, look at Asuka walking into last year’s Wrestlemania unstoppable and losing. Then Asuka fell off the radar and couldn’t beat the same woman that Becky has beaten or months. But now she’s not ready for Asuka?

This brings out Asuka to say Becky is like a bee with no sting. After the Rumble, Becky will be out of Charlotte’s shadow but into Asuka’s. This brings out the IIconics to say Becky is a bossy bully and Asuka isn’t acting like a champion should. It doesn’t matter how Becky and Asuka act anyway because they’re going to win the Royal Rumble, win the Women’s Tag Team Titles, and then make Wrestlemania ICONIC! Becky throws out the challenge and we take a break.

Becky Lynch vs. Peyton Royce

Becky is in jeans. An early Disarm-Her attempt sends Peyton to the ropes so Becky leg lariats her down. A backslide gives Becky two and she grabs an armbar as we see Lacey Evans watching from the back. Peyton fights up and gets in some kicks in the corner, followed by the chinlock. Becky sends her outside but a Billie distraction lets Peyton score with a clothesline as we take a break. Back with Becky fighting out of another chinlock before a Thesz press takes Peyton down for some right hands. There’s the Bexploder into the Disarm-Her for the tap at 9:51.

Rating: D+. Nothing much to see here but it did its job well enough. At least the IIconics are still around, which is more than has been the case in recent weeks. They’re fine for roles like this and can be the annoying duo for a long time going forward. Asuka vs. Becky is starting to feel personal, which is exactly where it needs to go.

Post match Asuka yells a lot and drags Billie in as we have a second match.

Asuka vs. Billie Kay

Non-title. Asuka kicks her in the head and grabs an armbar with a stare at Becky. The Asuka Lock makes Billie tap at 46 seconds.

Post match Asuka and Becky yell at each other….and here’s AJ Styles? The women leave and AJ jumps the barricade to head up the steps. Back from a break with AJ in the concourse at the concession stand. Last week Bryan said these people weren’t healthy and happy but they look happy to him. Eat what you want if it makes you happy. If you want a hot dog, go get yourself one. These people are no different than the ones in Phoenix, where AJ is getting the title back. Off to the merchandise stand now, as AJ grabs some shirts and throws them into the crowd. Cue Bryan for the brawl until security breaks it up. More good stuff.

The Usos are at a photo shoot when Jimmy gets a package. It’s their anniversary tomorrow so Jimmy thinks it’s an early present. Jey opens it up and finds a rose with a note. The message says that she’s been a naughty girl and needs to be locked up in the Uso Penitentiary, signed Mandy. There’s a hotel room key included and Jimmy says he’s not sure what he’s doing. This is interesting, even if I think you know where the payoff is going.

Samoa Joe walks to the ring and sees EC3 posing in front of a mirror.

Andrade (yes Andrade, who has lost his Cien Almas) says he used to idolize Rey Mysterio but it’s time to start thinking about the future. He wins tonight, and then wins the Royal Rumble.

Samoa Joe vs. Mustafa Ali

Joe jumps him before the bell and sends Ali hard into the post for a knockout. No match. Joe goes to leave but comes back and beats Ali up even more. He goes to leave again but comes back again, this time for a powerbomb, but Joe opts to throw Ali into the barricade instead. Note that the light on Ali’s vest never went out, meaning that’s a high quality product.

Sonya Deville isn’t sure if Mandy Rose should give Jimmy Uso her room key. Mandy knows how scandalous it is and it’s all being done because she hates Naomi. Breaking up their marriage sounds like a good idea to her.

Rey Mysterio is on his way to the ring and gets freaked out by Nikki Cross.

Samoa Joe says that was just a preview for the Royal Rumble. He’s entering for the first time and is hunting anyone who gets in his way.

Rey Mysterio vs. Andrade

Rey starts spinning around to start and armdrags Andrade into the corner. A headlock slows Andrade down a bit more and the hold hits the mat. Andrade is right back with a hammerlock and wrenches Rey down to really stay on the arm. The arm gets sent into the corner and the armbar goes right back on. Rey sends him outside with a headscissors but Andrade slides back in where he has to duck the 619.

The hammerlock DDT is countered into a rollup which is countered into another rollup for two on Rey, with Andrade saying it was that close. That’s fine with Rey as he kicks Andrade in the head and hurricanranas him to the floor but Andrade doesn’t let go, meaning it’s a sitout powerbomb on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Rey speeding things up again and hitting a hurricanrana, followed by a tornado DDT for two. Rey gets caught on the top but is fine enough to hit a nice looking hurricanrana to take Andrade from the apron to the floor. A seated senton off the apron takes Andrade down again and we take a break. Back with Rey getting two off a Code Red until Almas kicks him in the face for the same.

Andrade’s double moonsault gets two but Rey is right back with something like a running Canadian Destroyer to drop Andrade HARD on his head for two more. The 619 is blocked so Rey settles for a crucifix driver for two instead. Now the 619 connects but a Vega distraction lets Andrade crotch Rey on top. The hanging hammerlock DDT finishes Mysterio at 20:36.

Rating: B. This was a very fun match, assuming you can ignore Rey’s knees being torn and wrecked every time he takes a step. They’re doing a good job of making Almas look like a star here and that’s exactly the point. Mysterio is one of those guys who could lose every match he has for the rest of his career and still be a legend so it’s not like losing a competitive and entertaining twenty minute match is going to hurt anything.

We recap the Mandy/Jimmy stuff.

Jimmy goes to the hotel room where Mandy is in a robe. She says the time to play hard to get is over and takes off her robe to reveal some lingerie, which again is about the same as what she wears to the ring. Jimmy says no and reaches out a hand to hold her back, as a photographer pops out to take pictures. Mandy laughs off the idea that she wanted Jimmy because this is all about destroying Naomi. Mandy: “She will never be as hot as me.”

Once Naomi sees the photos, she’ll be destroyed. Jimmy doesn’t seem shaken and walks away. As he leaves, Naomi comes in and beats Mandy down, proving that there are intelligent people in wrestling. Mandy fights back and knocks her into a wall before leaving. Jimmy comes in to help Naomi up as she said this isn’t over.

We look at the unveiling of the Women’s Tag Team Titles.

Royal Rumble rundown.

Here’s Miz for a big celebration of Shane McMahon’s birthday, complete with cakes and presents. Miz introduces Shane for a birthday dance as Shane is rather energetic, as usual. Miz has two cakes for him, including a little chocolate and vanilla, though one of them has a picture of Miz and Shane on it.

That brings us to the first present, the Jordan 33 sneakers, with Shane (known for his love of sneakers), listing off every feature. Next up is a video tribute to Shane, who then talks about always wanting to be Tag Team Champions. Now his first pick was Andre the Giant but he’s happy to walk into the Rumble this Sunday (or next Sunday) with Miz as his partner.

Miz then leads the crowd in Happy Birthday but here’s the Bar to interrupt. They say Vince was invited to this whole thing but he doesn’t care enough to actually show up. Shane didn’t like the Bar attacking Miz last week so let’s have Sheamus vs. Miz tonight. Miz is in a suit but Shane says he wore a suit when he won the Best in the World tournament. That’s enough for Miz and we’re on.

Sheamus vs. The Miz

Joined in progress with Miz (in suit pants) hammering away but getting sent to the apron for the forearms to the chest. White Noise is countered into a rollup to give Miz two so Sheamus knees him in the ribs. The Skull Crushing Finale is blocked but Miz avoids a charge into the post and hits some running dropkicks. Sheamus gets in another shot so Cesaro gets on the apron, allowing Shane to throw him through a cake at ringside. Miz grabs a rollup for the pin at 4:03.

Rating: D. I like both guys but this is much more about Shane than anything else and that’s not going to work. He’s turning 49 years old today and is somehow getting a title shot at the Royal Rumble. I’m not sure how that’s supposed to work, but he’s a McMahon so that’s what matters. The Shane portion of the show ate up about half an hour, which is way more than Shane could ever need. Just please don’t let this lead to Shane getting another big Wrestlemania spot, even though you know it’s going there.

Post match Sheamus beats on Miz with Shane making the save. The Skull Crushing Finale plants Sheamus and Miz is surprised that Shane helped him. Shane goes up top as Miz grabs a cake, which is driven into Sheamus’ face off the Coast to Coast. Shane is banged up to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. That last quarter really hurt thins and there wasn’t much of a way to fix it. The Mysterio vs. Andrade match was good but it’s not good enough to make up for half an hour of the Shane and Miz Show. The rest of the show was fine enough with Bryan vs. AJ being good stuff and the Mandy/Naomi story being good enough soap opera drama which thankfully didn’t include Naomi being an idiot. I liked most of the show but that focus on Miz/Shane has me worried for the future.

Results

Becky Lynch b. Peyton Royce – Disarm-Her

Asuka b. Billie Kay – Asuka Lock

Andrade b. Rey Mysterio – Hanging hammerlock DDT

The Miz b. Sheamus – Rollup

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Royal Rumble 2006
Date: January 29, 2006
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 16,178
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles, Tazz

The opening video is about Mark Henry vs. Kurt Angle. The Rumble and Edge vs. Cena gets a little time as well.

Cruiserweight Title: Gregory Helms vs. Kid Kash vs. Funaki vs. Jamie Noble vs. Nunzio vs. Paul London

Nunzio hits a slingshot to send Noble into the corner and Funaki adds a bulldog for two. We finally get to the dives with Nunzio diving on a pair of guys, allowing Noble to get two on Kash via a leg lariat. Noble dives on Helms and Nunzio on the floor and Funaki is knocked off the top onto Nunzio and Noble. London kicks Kash to the floor as well and dives on everyone not named Helms with a shooting star off the top.

Trish is looking GREAT in a referee outfit when Mickie, currently the psycho lesbian, comes up and says she loves Trish. Ok then.

Mickie James vs. Ashley Massaro

Big Show draws his number. Rey comes in to talk about Eddie a bit. Apparently Eddie is joking with Rey by giving him this number.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Boogeyman

Before the Rumble starts, the Spirit Squad comes out to give us a chant.

Royal Rumble

HHH is #1 and Mysterio is #2, naturally coming out in a lowrider and an Eddie shirt. HHH tries to power him down to start but Rey comes back with kicks to the knee. Rey hits a headscissors to take HHH down and into the corner but HHH lifts him to the apron. Rey comes back with a springboard dropkick to the back but HHH ducks the 619. Simon Dean is #3 and goes after Rey to a bunch of boos. Dean sends him to the apron and wants a high five from HHH but gets punched in the face and hit by a seated senton. The elimination is academic.

Lashley immediately comes back with an overhead belly to belly and a third press slam to HHH. Kane takes a Dominator and Sylvan, the “Smackdown fashion consultant” is #10 and lasts about 18 seconds before Lashley throws him out. Unfortunately he turns around and gets caught in a double chokeslam followed by the elimination. The partners quickly turn on each other with Kane getting a boot up to stop a charging Show. They fight to the ropes and HHH runs up to throw them both out, emulating the same thing Shawn did in 1996 with Vader and Yokozuna.

Benoit chops on HHH until Joey Mercury is #14. Mercury fires off dropkicks but gets caught in Rolling Germans. Carlito jumps Benoit to break it up and Mercury pounds on Benoit a bit. Freaking Tatanka is #15, giving us a group of Mysterio, HHH, Carlito, Benoit, Mercury and Tatanka. Seriously why did the bring TATANKA back? He fires off chops as the fans do the Seminole chant.

Shawn has to skin the cat to stay in and turns into a kick to the head from Shelton. Michaels is cool with that and sends Shelton to the apron followed by a superkick to eliminate him. This brings out Vince who hates Shawn and the distraction lets Shane run in and dump HBK. Shawn is ticked and runs back in and superkicks HHH after escaping a Pedigree attempt. He goes after Vince but a single referee stops him. Ok then.

Mickie comes in to hit on Trish as she does an interview on WWE.com.

We recap Edge vs. Cena. Edge won MITB back at Mania and waited nine months before cashing in on Cena after Cena survived the Elimination Chamber. Tonight is the rematch three weeks later.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Edge

Edge tries for a countout but Cena DIVES back in at nine. Back in and Cena pounds away but charges into a spinwheel kick for two from the Canadian. Edge punches Cena to the floor again but goes after him instead of going for the countout again. Cena gets sent into the steps and back inside a missile dropkick gets two for the champion. Edge loads up a superplex but gets shoved off, only to avoid a guillotine legdrop from Cena.

Edge freaks out on Todd Grisham in the back. Edge storms off and Lita panics a bit. We get a random Hacksaw Jim Duggan cameo (does anyone do those better?) to call her a HO!

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Mark Henry

Instead Angle hits a German (kind of) to put both guys down. The Angle Slam gets two (duh) and the ankle lock is broken up again. The counter causes the referee to get bumped so Angle gets a chair. A low blow and two chair shots take Henry down for two, so Angle takes a buckle off. Kurt drop toeholds him into the buckle and rolls Henry up to retain. Our hero everyone.

Taker comes out in a freaking horse drawn chariot and motions that he wants the title. Then he shoots lightning from his hands at the stuff over the ring, before slamming his arms down to send lightning at the posts. The ring collapses to end the show. Yeah that happened.

Ratings Comparison

Gregory Helms vs. Kid Kash vs. Funaki vs. Jamie Noble vs. Nunzio vs. Paul London

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Mickie James vs. Ashley Massaro

Original: C-

Redo: D

Boogeyman vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Original: F-

Redo: N/A

Royal Rumble

Original: D

Redo: C-

John Cena vs. Edge

Original: B

Redo: D+

Kurt Angle vs. Mark Henry

Original: D-

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D

What was I on for that Edge vs. Cena match?

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/25/royal-rumble-count-up-2006-eddie-guerrero-puts-on-a-mask-and-wins-the-rumble/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: August 5, 2004
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re getting close to Summerslam and the big story around here is over the US Title with Booker T. winning the title in an eight way match last week. John Cena isn’t happy though and is still coming for Booker and the title, which you have to imagine will take place at Summerslam. Oh and Kurt Angle and Eddie Guerrero still hate each other. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

New General Manager Theodore Long opens the show with pictures of Vince McMahon and Martin Luther King Jr. in his office. One had a vision and the other had a dream but they’ve both made him want to make Smackdown a great show for the fans. If you thought last week’s show was great, you haven’t seen anything yet. Call your friends and knock on your neighbor’s door because we’re starting with a #1 contenders match.

John Cena vs. Rob Van Dam

The winner gets a shot at Booker at some point in the future. They trade waistlocks to start and that’s a clean break. Van Dam slips out of a headscissors of all things and that’s an early standoff. Another clean break gives us a handshake as the fans switch from Van Dam to Cena. Van Dam gets tossed outside where he kicks Cena in the head to take over. Cena is smart enough to get off the barricade before the spinning kick can connect. Now why has no one else ever thought of that?

They fight over a suplex on the apron with Cena suplexing him out to the floor for a nasty landing as we take a break. Back with Cena getting two off a release fisherman’s suplex but Van Dam kicks him in the head again. Another kick to the face keeps Cena in trouble as Booker is cheering both of them on in the back. The split legged moonsault gives Van Dam two and Rolling Thunder is good for the same.

Since it’s been a few minutes since we’ve seen one, Van Dam kicks him in the face and goes up top for….actually a guillotine legdrop instead of the Five Star. Cena grabs a DDT (Why did he stop using that?) for a delayed two of his own. One heck of an elbow to the jaw rocks Van Dam and the ProtoBomb plants him again.

The Shuffle gets two and Cena goes up, which isn’t likely to be a good idea. Indeed Van Dam kicks him in the head and grabs a superplex but Cena reverses into a small package for the pin (the stupid kind where they’re both laying down and then kick their legs up for no reason other than to get to the finish) and the title shot.

Rating: B-. Cena is looking more and more like the guy who could be the next star every time he’s out there. The comedy is starting to take a backseat to the good, quality matches and while this wasn’t a great one, it was solid with Cena helping Van Dam put on a nice performance. A feud with Booker is only going to help him.

We get a show of respect post match.

Long comes in to see Booker and says he and Cena are so equal that one match isn’t enough. There’s going to be a best of five series for the title with the first match taking place at “Summer Games”.

Here’s Eddie Guerrero for a chat, complete with Torrie Wilson, Sable and Dawn Marie in the low rider. All of Kurt Angle’s stuff that Eddie is auctioning off is in the ring and the auction ends tonight. That’s why the women are here: to help raise the value. This includes putting the cast on Torrie and having her sit in the wheelchair so the women can sign the cast. Then we have the signed photo of Angle but Eddie is staring at Sable instead.

The girls autograph that too before Eddie moves on to talking about Angle’s last match. That just happened to be against Eddie at Wrestlemania where Eddie pinned him in a classic. Eddie promises to win again and we see an Olympic themed commercial of Eddie gluing the other runners to their starting blocks to win a Gold Medal of his own.

Rene Dupree vs. Orlando Jordan

I had almost forgotten Jordan existed. Dupree knocks him outside and into the steps to start before throwing right hands inside. Jordan gets thrown to the apron so Dupree can hit the French Tickler. With the dancing done, Dupree turns around into a high crossbody to give Jordan the upset. Yay.

JBL arrives and asks Josh how he’s doing while using hand sanitizer after shaking hands. He’s not afraid of Undertaker you see and is calling him out tonight.

Kurt Angle vs. Charlie Haas

This is Angle’s first match since Wrestlemania with Luther Reigns and Miss Jackie here as well. Feeling out process to start as they trade takedowns and escapes. Angle hits a hiptoss and Haas is right back with an armdrag into an armbar. Another armdrag sends Angle bailing out to the floor and we take an early break.

Back with Haas grabbing a hammerlock but getting snapmared into a chinlock. With the wrestling not getting us very far, Angle starts hammering away in the corner to really take over. Haas grabs a suplex and hammers away in the corner but walks into the belly to belly. The chinlock with a knee in the back goes on before Angle gets frustrated at the repeated kickouts.

A bodyscissors keeps Haas down but he fights up and sends Angle outside for a breather. Back in and Angle goes shoulder first into the post, setting up a springboard twisting ax handle (the announcers are surprised too) to give Haas two. That’s enough for Angle as he picks the ankle but gets sent into the corner. Angle isn’t having that either and takes down the straps, setting up the grapevined ankle lock for the tap.

Rating: B-. This was a good return for Angle as he wasn’t as sharp as he used to be but started to put it together as the match went on. Haas was a smart choice here as Angle is better at everything that Haas can do but Haas can still make him work. Angle is going to get better and better with some more matches, capped off by the big one at Summerslam.

Summerslam rundown.

Raw Rebound.

Tag Team Titles: Basham Brothers vs. Billy Kidman/Paul London

Kidman and London are defending. Danny starts with Kidman but it’s quickly off to London for a double hiptoss. A slingshot legdrop keeps Danny in trouble but Doug pulls Kidman off the apron to take over. Kidman gets dropped ribs first onto the top rope to make things even worse and we hit the bearhug. A kick to the head gives Danny two but Kidman scores with a dropkick and dives over for the tag off to London. Everything breaks down and Kidman uses London’s back as a launchpad for an enziguri. The 450 retains the titles.

Rating: C. Now this is the kind of thing that the champs needed. They had a nice little title defense here against a known team and won clean. Build up the credibility a bit and the reign will feel a little more important. The Bashams are so much better without Shaniqua, as they’ve gone from a joke to an average team, which is quite the upgrade.

John Cena wants you to vote.

Paul Heyman/Heidenreich video.

Rey Mysterio/Spike Dudley vs. Dudley Boyz

A loud Bubba drives Spike into the corner to start and a dropkick to Bubba only hurts Spike’s knee. Rey comes in and Spike walks it off on the floor as you might see something coming here. Mysterio’s springboard moonsault has Bubba in trouble and D-Von charges into a boot in the corner. In a questionable move, Spike tags himself in and missile dropkicks D-Von, only to hurt the knee again.

The distraction lets Bubba gorilla press Rey onto D-Von’s raised knee to bang up the ribs. The bearhug doesn’t last long and Bubba/s big elbow draws a smile. D-Von dives into a raised boot and the springboard seated senton puts Bubba down. Rey has to fight both Dudleys off at the same time with D-Von breaking up the 619. The 3D finishes Mysterio with Spike not being able to get in for the save.

Rating: D+. Just a match here and there’s a good chance that its main purpose was to set up a post match angle. Mysterio losing to both Dudleys in a glorified handicap match is fine and it gets the Dudleys some momentum back, though I’m not sure how interesting a story built around Spike is going to be.

Post match Spike helps Rey up and then turns on him, celebrating with his brothers instead. Spike wants a table and puts Rey through one with a top rope double stomp, setting up villainous posing. Uh, ok. I’m not sure why I’m supposed to care about Spike Dudley as a big villain, but this is somewhat (I think) better than having the Dudleys as the top heels. At least there’s no attempted murder involved.

Here’s JBL in the ring to call out Undertaker. He used to be a Texan but now he’s so glad to have moved to New York City. Now that he’s returned, he was hoping for the hero’s welcome that he deserved but tonight is about business. That’s why he’s calling Undertaker out right here and right now instead of waiting for Summerslam. The gong sounds and, in one of the famous WWE tropes, it’s a mini Taker. Tazz finds it hilarious, calling him the Undertoddler. JBL: “You look a lot bigger on television.”

He gets on his knees to look Undertaker eye to eye and makes a bunch of short jokes before loading the mini Taker up for a Tombstone. The gong goes off again though and the real Undertaker appears. It’s a quick beatdown to set up a Tombstone but Orlando Jordan of all people runs in for the save. Undertaker poses and the mini version does the same, earning a chokeslam to end the show. There were some good lines from JBL but this was eye rolling WWE comedy at its “finest”.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was good here and they advanced some stories, there were a few things on here holding it back. The ending segment, along with Spike’s turn, aren’t exactly thrilling stuff and having Jordan be JBL’s lackey is far from interesting. I mean, there’s a reason that I had forgotten Jordan even existed until tonight. There’s some good stuff on here and enough to make the show easy to watch, which is about as you can ask for at times. Hopefully Summerslam is as good as the better half of the build has been, though it’s still not as strong as Raw at the moment.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6