Survivor Series Count-Up – 2005 (2012 Redo): Cena vs. The Machine

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2005
Date: November 27, 2005
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 15,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman, Michael Cole, Tazz

The announcers talk about the main event and bragging rights to start things off.

Booker T vs. Chris Benoit

Melina gets thrown around by her hair, sending those furry boots flying. Trish headscissors her down and I think they botch a headscissors out of the corner with Trish kicking Melina in the face instead of getting the ankles around her head. Melina uses her basic abilities (meaning stretching to freakish angles to choke and kick a lot) before going to the floor for a cat fight with Mickie.

Rating: C-. This was much better than I was expecting given what level Melina was at here. Trish looked fine (and her wrestling was even good too) but she needed more to work with here. This would lead up to Mickie going totally psycho and evil, setting up an excellent match (other than the ending) at Mania between the two of them.

Dmitri Young, a baseball payer, is here.

Ric Flair vs. HHH

Flair is taken out on a stretcher.

Buy the Bret Hart DVD! No really, this one is awesome.

Trish and Mickie do an online interview.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Kurt Angle

The fans are ALL OVER Cena all of a sudden, with a huge Cena Sucks chant. Off to a chinlock with Angle holding the leg back as well. Cena finally comes back with a jawbreaker and a DDT to put both guys down. They slug it out with Cena taking over via some clotheslines. Cena initiates his finishing sequence and is set for the FU, but Angle clotheslines the replacement referee.

Eric Bischoff vs. Teddy Long

Team Smackdown is coming to the ring and the Smackdown D-list guys cheer them on.

The Raw guys do the same thing.

Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown

Shawn Michaels, Carlito, Chris Masters, Kane, Big Show,

Batista, Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio, Bobby Lashley, John Bradshaw Layfield

Off to Masters who gets his eyes raked by Orton but the power game of Masters takes over. Lashley comes in to a reaction from the fans and they do the two power guys collide with each other. Bobby takes over with a slam but Masters clotheslines him down. Masters tries the Masterlock but Bobby easily blocks it. Carlito is pulled in and thrown around as well, culminating with a powerslam for two.

Off to Shawn to see what he can do with this monster, but Lashley slams him off the top. A suplex puts Shawn down so Carlito comes in sans tag and takes the Dominator. Shawn is about to take one as well, but Kane breaks it up and chokeslams Lashley to give Shawn the pin. Rey comes in next and Kane hits him in the back as well to give Shawn another advantage. Masters drops some elbows on Rey to keep him on the mat which is the right move.

Ratings Comparison

Booker T vs. Chris Benoit

Original: B

Redo: B-

Trish Stratus vs. Melina

Original: B

Redo: C-

HHH vs. Ric Flair

Original: B-

Redo: B+

John Cena vs. Kurt Angle

Original: B+

Redo: C

Theodore Long vs. Eric Bischoff

Redo: S (For Six Minutes)

Team Smackdown vs. Team Raw

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: B

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/14/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2005-a-forgotten-almost-classic/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series Count-Up – 2005 (Original): When This Was New

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2005
Date: November 27, 2005
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 15,000
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles, Tazz, Michael Cole

It’s all about brand supremacy here as the main event and the only match with a good build this year is Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown. What does that actually gain us? Absolutely nothing, but it’s the best we can come up with so there we are. Continuing that theme we also have Teddy Long vs. Eric Bischoff. Oh that’s going to be awful isn’t it. In some real wrestling we have in the Raw main event John Cena vs. Kurt Angle. Now we’re getting somewhere.

This was a weird time for the company as there’s just not a lot going on right now and they’re just kind of going through the motions. Cena and Batista are the top dogs on their respective shows but there’s just nothing that’s a spark for the company right now which is a trend that would continue for a few more years after this.

TNA is starting to get its footing but it’s far from a major deal in case you three TNA fans were wondering. That was random I know but this opening paragraph was way too short.

Don’t you just hate it when you run out of things to say and you just have to ramble on and on about absolutely nothing at all when it’s clear that the person talking is some moron that has nothing else to say but beating around the bush and trying to fill up space in a page because he’s not intelligent enough to have anything else to say about something he’s reviewing on a website like WrestleZone which should be about wrestling but isn’t always? Yeah I hate that too. Let’s do this.

There is one major thing that happened recently as Eddie Guerrero passed away two weeks before this show. I’ve always thought he was both overrated and gets far to much hype, but he was certainly a great talent and could wrestle with anyone and it was sad to lose him, especially when he was allegedly going to win the world title again before this show.

Again, the video is just painfully generic. It’s just a voiceover guy talking about survival and clips of the feuds. The only highlight is a single shot of taker who was returning tonight. Once we’re in the arena we find that it’s Styles on commentary which is a nice change of pace. Not saying he’s better or worse than Ross, but when you do so many of these in a row it’s nice to hear a different voice.

This was a time when for whatever reason we had three announcers for Raw which is of course overkill. Lawler either slips up or makes a sex joke by saying return your flight attendants to their upright positions. No one laughed but they didn’t react either so they either didn’t get it or didn’t notice.

They talk about how Raw will beat Smackdown which is fine. We go to the Spanish guys and then over to Cole and Tazz. For some reason this made me laugh. It was like the Spanish guys were just randomly thrown in there with no rhyme or reason. Stuff like that amuses me.

Chris Benoit vs. Booker T

This is match 1 in a best of 7 series for the US Title which was vacant due to a double pin between these two. The series wound up being Benoit vs. Orton because Booker got hurt so once Orton won the last match Booker got the title because that makes perfect sense right? These two traded the title back and forth like four times in about eight months which was just kind of stupid but whatever.

The whole idea of a series is stupid as well for one simple reason: why should we care about the first few matches? These don’t mean anything and nothing is going to be decided here, so why should we watch? Sharmell gets her own entrance and she is just painful to listen to. Something feels different about this show from last year which is a good thing. It feels bigger I guess you could say.

We start with a weird looking spot where Booker tries for a slam but can’t do it and it turns into a half suplex half powerslam. That was just odd. They mention that the second match will be on Tuesday at the Smackdown Special. That show was a disgrace for two reasons. First of all it was just flat out awful from a wrestling standpoint.

Second, there was a big spot where Eddie’s lowrider was blown with I think Big Show in it. This was sixteen days after Eddie died. Seriously? If you just have to use that for an angle, wait awhile would you?

Booker does some sweet looking stuff to get out of a test of strength. His in ring stuff really is overlooked. Booker gets an abdominal stretch and Benoit starts shaking his hips for some reason which looks very odd indeed. Benoit is getting dominated for the most part here, which is fine because he’s great at selling.

I’ll never get the point in announcers mentioning necks being surgically repaired. Wouldn’t that imply that they’re stronger than before? Are we really supposed to believe that a wrestler’s neck is still that weak even a year or so after they came back from the injury? Benoit gets a short comeback with one of those awesome Germans but Booker takes him down with a kick that was sweet looking. This has been a solid match.

Booker gets caught in an insane looking leg drag but avoids the Sharpshooter. After the triple Germans, Benoit goes for the headbutt but Booker stops him on the top. In a sequence that is very short but that I like, Benoit knocks him back down and goes for the headbutt anyway. See, while it seems pointless, it adds a bit more action to the match and got the fans into it just a tiny bit more. That’s what makes a match even better: adding that little extra bit.

Benoit could have just come off with the heabutt and missed to set up the finish, but instead we get an extra ten to fifteen seconds of action which got the crowd going a bit more. The more you can draw the fans in, the better the match is going to seem. If a match is weak (this one isn’t) that can be covered up by the crowd being into it. If a match is good (like this one) the crowd being into it means that the thing is a success on both levels.

Anyway, Benoit misses the headbutt and Booker gets a roll up with his feet on the bottom rope for the pin. Now wait a minute. How would the bottom rope help you? Isn’t the point of using the ropes to add more leverage to the pin by making you have to shove up a slope? With the bottom rope it’s just balanced out evenly.

Why am I wasting my time thinking about this? That ending was kind of weak but whatever. To further the stupidity, Sharmell grabs his feet and pulls down. Wouldn’t that pull Booker away from Benoit?

Rating: B. This was very solid. It’s not great but it’s very good. It was intense throughout other than the submission holds in the middle and it had time to develop. I’m not wild on the ending, but other than that I had no problems here. These two can work very well together when given the time as they were here, so who am I to complain? This was good but can someone shoot Sharmell for me please?

Bischoff is in the back warming up and Vince walks up. He wishes him luck and Bischoff says tonight he’s going to screw Cena, thereby making it about as obvious as possible that Cena will retain. Why do they insist on making so many Montreal references? They did it in WCW and the company died because they couldn’t let it go. Even after the mess that was Starrcade 97 they did it over and over again and it just never worked at all.

Also, they tried so hard to make Cena vs. Bischoff the next Austin vs. McMahon and it just failed. Actually failed isn’t the right word. It just didn’t live up to what it was supposed to be, which is fine because they’re inferior talents to what came before them. Also, since it had been done already there was no real reason to think this would be better which aren’t Cena and Bischoff’s faults at all. Anyway, Cena walks up and makes a gay joke to get Bischoff to leave.

Vince and Cena talk for a bit which when you think about it isn’t a pairing you see together that often. Vince actually says what’s up my nigger to Cena. WOW. Even Cena looks taken aback by this as do Booker and Sharmell. That was just out there to say the least.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Melina

Melina is part of MNM here along with Mercury and Nitro (now known as John Morrison). They’re the Smackdown tag champions and did the thing where they hung the belts from their belts so they hung between their legs. That’s original at least. This is inter promotional so Tazz and Styles are the commentators. ECW would be back in June with these two being the commentators.

Despite the fact that Melina looks better with all black hair instead of the blonde she has going here, she looks good in her signature entrance. Melina had MNM kidnap Trish on Raw so she could ask for a title shot because that makes perfect sense. Melina more or less is wrestling in a tiny bikini so this match has gone up in ratings for me. Mickie James, the newcomer, is with Trish.

Very soon she would go into the sexy crazy stalker mode with Trish, leading to her heel turn which was awesome. Trish starts with a spear and some punches that land squarely on the mat. Melina hits the floor but Trish hits a cross body from the top to the floor to take out all three heels. When did Lita get bigger and dye her hair red? Melina is a complete rookie here. Wow has she really been around for four years?

They botch a spot but if nothing else they make it work. It was supposed to be a headscissors but it turned into a kick to the face. It still worked though. Joey says Trish wins on paper. Tazz wants to see the paper. That’s actually kind of funny. Melina and Mickie fight on the floor while MNM goes for the Snapshot which was an elevated DDT on Trish. They get ejected for it though so that sucks. The belts are just making me laugh. This is intense if nothing else.

DANG Melina can hit the high notes. This is a quite good match actually. Melina actually counters Stratusfaction twice which isn’t bad. Mickie interferes to help Trish, leading to a kick and a top rope bulldog that missed but again they improvise slightly with Trish grabbing Melina’s hair on the way down.

It looked bad but it could have been worse, but it ends the match. On the replay they do a great job of covering the botch at the end by showing it from the back where you can’t tell how bad it was. That’s well done.

Rating: B. This was quite good. They beat the heck out of each other and on the two noticeable botches they improvised, especially the earlier one. Melina was clearly talented and not just another pretty face that thought she would try wrestling for a paycheck. Trish was her usual solid self here, so I have few complaints.

It was one of the better Diva matches that I can remember so that’s a perk. The looks didn’t hurt things either. This is what the Divas need to shoot for: hot women but good wrestling to back it up. I’d watch more of this.

Buy this PPV of the DVD of Jake Roberts.

We recap HHH vs. Flair which was a good feud I thought. More or less HHH decided that Flair was too far gone to mean anything anymore so he beat him up. Flair wound up winning the Intercontinental Title of all things which I actually liked as it made the belt seem prestigious. They had a cage match at Taboo Tuesday for the belt and Flair won clean in a great old school style match. That leads us to here which is last man standing.

Ric Flair vs. HHH

Like I said Flair is IC champion here but it’s non title. Trips jumps him in the aisle to start us off. Flair is beaten on pretty badly at first since his robs is still on. He comes back though as the old man powers will never die. They haven’t actually been in the ring at this point. Scratch that they have but it was for about twenty seconds. I’ll give Flair this: he can sell as well as anyone in history even at this age.

That’s why he was so great for so long: he could tell a story as well as anyone in the world. HHH works over his back which is fine. He needs to lose the mustache though. It just flat out doesn’t work on him. We go hardcore as HHH pulls out a screwdriver. Dang Flair is bleeding badly. Granted I think that happens is someone stares at him for more than four seconds. Has anyone been in as many last man standing matches as HHH?

He’s been in a ton of them over the years with at least three that I can remember against Orton alone. I’ve always loved that red blonde hair on Flair. They finally mention that it’s HHH’s lifelong goal to break Flair’s record, which depending on what you look at should be around 22 or 23. If TNA has their way Angle will pass that in about a week. Edge is likely going to get close to it as well, but I’d take almost any of Flair’s runs over any two or three of Edge’s combined.

They’re out on the floor again with Flair finally taking some control. I have a feeling we’re in for a long one here, which should be fine. Coach offers commentary simply saying what number the referee is up to. Good to see why he’s paid the big money. HHH gets on the mic because three commentators in one match just aren’t enough. He yells at Flair to get up and in the next breath says to stay down if he knows what’s good for him.

No wonder Flair never would retire. He was too confused from hanging out with HHH all those years. Flair grabs the ball of HHH for no apparent reason. Is he competing with Stephanie or something now? HHH gets control back because I guess he likes being the dominant one.

I’ll be pausing for a few seconds here to get the image of a submissive Stephanie out of my mind. Ok I think I’m good now. We hit the tables and HHH gets countered through the table as he always is. Both guys are more or less dead at this point. The table practically exploded too and it looked great. Both guys are up though and we keep going.

We’re back in the ring for likely the longest stretch of the match which is a nice change of pace. For some reason we have to get another replay of HHH going through the table. We get it already people. A chair comes into play and both men are down, or at least that’s what Styles says. Call me cracy, but Flair looks up to me. Flair continues making sense by going for the legs. He pulls the balls of HHH into the post as he seems slightly obsessed with them.

Lawler mentions that he hopes HHH isn’t planning on going out tonight. I certainly wouldn’t. If I had a wife like Stephanie I wouldn’t be going to work either so there we are. Flair bites HHH for the second time in the match, this time on the leg. Style infers that the biting could mess up the quad again. Oh come on now. Flair goes to town on the legs in a very slow old school style plus weapons. That’s not a bad idea actually.

The figure four makes HHH tap but it means nothing here. I love how he’ll give up in a match where it means nothing, but that’s a different story. They’re both back up now with HHH knocking Flair back down. HHH brings the steps in and for some reason that only Flair knows, he runs right at HHH and rams his head into the steps. That’s just stupid. This time HHH runs and Flair hits a drop toe hold to slam HHH into the steps. This is like a cartoon or something.

I know there’s not a lot being said here but a lot of this is either one or both guys laying there for a ten count which somehow takes about 30 seconds each. HHH gets a Pedigree to a big pop which means either the people are tired of this match or they like HHH. My guess is the former, because HHH is such a masterful heel that no one can hate him. I mean he’s the best of all time at everything right?

Flair of course gets up and takes another Pedigree but of course he gets up, this time throwing out a double bird to HHH. This just gets him beaten up more so he’s obviously the face. You very rarely see a heel being defiant and getting his beating because of it. The third Pedigree connects as this is complete overkill.

We get it: Flair is tough. There’s no need to kill the credibility of the Pedigree to prove this. A sledgehammer shot to I think the shoulder or something like that ends this. The fans are actually into this which is a good sign. I guess the reactions earlier on were for greatness, even though this wasn’t that great. It was good, but not great.

Rating: B-. This was very old school in nature so if you don’t like slower paced stuff, you’ll hate this. Both guys bring in a lot of psychology here which is exactly what they were supposed to do. The leg stuff worked quite well despite HHH not selling them at all at the end of the match. This was good at times but there were parts that just kind of sucked too.

The three Pedigrees were WAY too much and the fact that it took nearly half an hour to get rid of Flair is a bit of a stretch despite how great Flair is. Some people would love this while others will hate it, which to me is a good thing. It means that it’s not just a run of the mill match but rather something that gets an opinion out of people, which to me is always good.

After about three minutes of replays we see Flair being stretchered out of the arena.

Buy the Bret Hart DVD, which was quite good actually.

Team Smackdown says they have to make up for Batista’s injury while Bradshaw sounds stupid. This was a waste of three minutes of my life.

Edge and Lita come out to say that the Cutting Edge will be debuting soon. He was hurt at the moment so this was their way to keep him on camera which really is a great idea. Edge goes after Dmitri Young who is a hometown baseball guy in the front row. He and Lita insult Young for about five minutes with nothing of note to say about it. Yep, that was a waste of time.

We recap Kurt vs. Cena which was something like this: Angle wants a title show and has his own referee that’s going to cheat to make him win. That’s all you’ve got to know here.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Kurt Angle

This both has the big match feeling and doesn’t have it. I’m leaning towards no because of the spinner belt and Daivari as the referee. Angle looks far better in the darker colored singlet. The same can be said of Cena if you change the word singlet for long shorts. Angle naturally immediately starts on the leg as we have LOUD dueling chants. They’re out of sync though so it takes a trained ear to get what’s being said.

It’s nice hearing Styles speaking with an interest in the product. Ross and Lawler rarely sounded interested in matches and while Styles isn’t as great as he’s built up to be by any means, he’s awesome at times. Dang we’ve been going for about three minutes and those chants literally haven’t stopped. They’re quieting a bit but by no means are they stopping. If this was in front of a Wrestlemania sized crowd with these kinds of fans….good night that would be amazing.

These two could main event a Mania as well, and given Angle it’s not completely out of the question to have that happen. This is one of the hottest crowds I’ve ever seen. Cena gets a cover and Daivari just stands there and we have a story. Ankle lock is hooked, finally called the Angle Lock like it should have been many times before, and the referee is all over it. He finally gets the ropes and of course the hold isn’t broken.

He gets out himself and slaps the referee (I’ll be referring to him as that because Daivari requires that I think as I type) and Angle makes the diving save to stop the disqualification. Oh for those fans that might be new, Daivari is now known as Sheik Abdul Bashir in TNA. The referee gets bumped by Cena and we go to the floor. Angle pops his hips on a sweet belly to belly overhead suplex to Cena. That was always an awesome move.

A real referee comes down and we now have a far more normal match. They go to the mat for awhile and it occurs to me that Angle can get away with far more boring moves on the mat such as just basic grapples because of his background. When he uses something like a front facelock I buy it a lot more because he’s an Olympian. That just goes to show you what a real background can do for someone. Cena can do a great job of fighting back.

There’s just something about him that makes you want to watch him which is something that very few people can accomplish. There go those chants again. Cena starts the comeback as I’m starting to wonder where Daivari is. He didn’t get hit by anything huge. Cena just knocked Angle into him and he’s been down at least five minutes. Angle apparently needs glasses because he can’t see Cena. Man maybe he really does as he clotheslines the heck out of the referee and low blows Cena.

A third referee comes out and for some reason has NO problem with Angle laying out his colleague. Now wait a minute. As they mentioned earlier, it’s standard operating procedure for a new referee to run out in case the regular one gets knocked out. That means that someone, and I’d assume the referee that ran down, has to be watching the match in the back right? If not how would he know that he was needed in the ring? If that’s the case, why couldn’t he disqualify Angle?

This is what overbooking a match does to it: it brings up a lot of loopholes that aren’t needed. After a few minutes of good stuff, Angle misses a picture perfect moonsault. I mean that was lucha libre quality. Angle gets out of the FU and then hits the third referee and rolls Daivari, who is still out cold, back in.

A fourth referee, this one from Smackdown, comes out as Cena DDTs Daivari for no apparent reason as he was already out cold. With four people laying in the ring (Cena and three referees), Cena plays possum and Angle walks into the FU for the pin. I want more of this!

Rating: B+. This is a great example of a situation where the extra booking was 100% not needed. I was completely buying into this match which is something that very rarely happens to me. There’s a natural connection here that is very clear and it worked incredibly well. I don’t get why there needed to be the gimmick with the referees and things like that. A lot of the times less is more and this is certainly one of those times. I’d love to see these guys go at it even more.

Watch this really bad show that we’re calling a special!

Eric Bischoff vs. Teddy Long

Eric is of course dressed in his karate stuff, because anyone that follows tournament karate knows that Eric Bischoff is a great fighter. I will never get over Schiavone saying that at Starrcade 97. Teddy is with Palmer Cannon, who was a very short term character that was a representative of the network. He served absolutely zero purpose and I’ve never been sure what the point of having him was.

Granted to be fair I missed about a year and a half of Smackdown due to not having the station and just not being interested in it. I would always catch the spoilers though so I at least knew what was going on. The words to describe how I feel going into this match haven’t been invented yet. No good can come from this at all. It’s like the book in Hocus Pocus. To top it off, Cole and Coach are your commentators. I just had to stop the video for the sake of laughter.

Coach: “Eric Bischoff is a mixed martial artist.” I don’t care or know if that’s true or not but it’s the funniest image I can think of. Can you imagine him against Brock or GSP? Cole starts the Did You Know tradition with a stat that I’m not going to remember in a few seconds. Yep it’s gone. The bell rang 45 seconds ago. In that time they’ve avoided contact with each other, Teddy has posed on the ropes and then he danced a bit. This is riveting stuff!

Cole calls Bischoff Mr. Miyagi. The one liners for this match are going to take up a full page. After about a minute and a half I think we made contact but I’m not sure. Teddy dances more than Shawn Michaels imitating Shane. Cannon gets on the apron for no apparent reason and imitates the things that Long has been doing as Bischoff chokes Long with his belt. Why am I watching this? Oh there’s two referees, one from Raw one from Smackdown because this needs more people.

We have our second boring chant as we’re still doing the choking thing. Bischoff changes the pace a bit by using the world’s worst sleeper. Cannon gets up again and Long uses the distraction of both referees (since a guy named Palmer Cannon is obviously a major threat) to take his shoe off and hit Eric with it to break up the “hold”. Wouldn’t the shoe be legal? It’s not a foreign object unless it was made in Japan or something like that so I don’t get it.

Eric takes over again with a Kung Fu YEAH and a Karate Chop! Give me a break I have to make jokes like those to keep myself awake during this mess. We’re on boring chant number four and the Boogeyman’s music hits. He had only been around for a few weeks at this point and nothing was known about him.

The referees go up the ramp to stop him and naturally he’s behind Eric. I love how a guy like Boogeyman used a freaking pumphandle slam. Papa Shango used a shoulderbreak. I’m not sure which is dumber. Teddy gets the pin with ease and dances a bit more. He really is a tiny man. Ok so he dances a lot.

Rating: O, as in oh I can’t think about this anymore. Give me anything else please!

Armageddon proimo.

Team Smackdown is coming to the ring as the Smackdown guys cheer them on. The Raw guys do the same thing. The backstory here is simple. There was a special called WWE Homecoming where there was a Smackdown match scheduled but Bischoff canceled it because it wasn’t up to his standards. The feud sprang from there. Other than that, the only thing you need to know is that Eddie has just passed away and Orton is his replacement and Batista was injured by Show and Kane.

Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown

Raw: Shawn Michaels, Carlito, Chris Masters, Kane, Big Show
Smackdown: Batista, Rey Mysterio, Lashley, Randy Orton, JBL

All ten guys get their own entrances because we need to kill about ten minutes or so. To further the stupidity of this we’re having all five commentators here. HBK and Orton start us off. On both shows everyone has been attacking everyone so I’ll be withholding the so and so attacked so and so on so and so show. Even Styles and Tazz are arguing. They point out that Orton has been the sole survivor in the previous two Survivor Series.

Again, this is what announcers are supposed to do. Rey just looks out of place on the apron with all of these big guys. Orton and HBK do nothing but punch/chop each other for a few minutes as Tazz and the rest of the announcers have their stupid fights. For some reason Chris Masters is in the main event here in something that I just don’t get. Lashley comes in and gets a great pop. Lashley is about as green as possible here with next to zero experience.

He has the amateur background to fall back on though along with insane power so he can use both of those to avoid any actual wrestling. Is there a reason why amateur guys use a ton of suplexes? Angle, Lesnar and the Steiners were all suplex machines as well as all American wrestlers. Why is that? They all use belly to belly overhead suplexes. I’ve never gotten that. Is that supposed to be something that’s used in amateur wrestling, because I’ve never seen that done in the Olympics.

After he dominates Carlito (he hit him with the Dominator so he literally did), he goes for it on Shawn but Kane grabs him from the apron and hits a chokeslam to allow HBK to pin him. I guess that’s a smart move as it keeps Lashley from looking weak because cheating beat him. That’s about as good as you could have done there I suppose. Rey comes in after Lashley as HBK is still in there.

Kane comes in for Raw and Rey of course dominates him because Kane can’t look good in a big match ever. Kane and Show are Raw tag champions at the time too which I forgot to mention. Kane just about kills Rey with a boot. That was awesome looking. Tazz is just ripping into Coach on commentary.

It’s funny but it’s distracting as all five guys are fighting and not a thing is being said about the match. I’ve always found that to be incredibly disrespectful. It shouldn’t be about the announcers but about the wrestlers, period.

Batista comes in and after more double teaming he takes out Kane with a spinebuster. He gets up and walks into a Big Show chokeslam which doesn’t take him out. The double one from Kane and Big Show does though so we’re down to 4-3. JBL comes in next and in a flat out SCARY show of strength, Big Show catches him coming off the top rope. That’s ridiculous.

Soon thereafter, the whole Smackdown team attacks Show, beginning with a Clothesline From JBL, a 619, an RKO (Massive pop for that), a second Clothesline From JBL and all of that doesn’t keep him down, but Rey jumps on him and that’s enough for a 3. This is why I hate Rey. He’s one of my all time favorites but at times he makes me want to rip my hair out. Why should that pin Big Show when he was almost up from all of those finishers?

That just doesn’t make any sense. JBL destroys his future employee on the floor while we try to figure out who Rey is supposed to be fighting and it’s Masters. Carlito comes in and slows down everything with a chinlock that goes on far too long. HBK is still down on the floor from the fall away slam that JBL hit him with. Rey finally gets up and makes a blind tag to JBL. With Rey distracting him, Bradshaw hits one of the best Clotheslines From JBL I’ve ever seen.

He half kills Carlito and gets the easy pin. He proceeds to beat the holy tar out of Masters, thus continuing to prove his worth. It’s Rey in now as HBK is still down meaning that the hopes of Raw rest on the shoulders of Chris Masters. I don’t even need to make fun of that one. Rey Drops the Dime on him and makes it 3-1. Styles has barely talked the whole match.

Shawn is thrown back in and Rey hits the 619. He goes for something that wasn’t clear but takes a less great looking version of the ending Shawn and Shelton did to take him out. Here comes JBL and there goes JBL with another kick. Bradshaw was in there less than ten seconds. We’re down to Orton and Michaels. We hit the floor but Shawn launches himself over the ropes as we’re doing the same thing we did back in 2003 which had far better drama and emotion to it but whatever.

The fans chant WE WANT TAKER who had been promised for the show and we have less than ten minutes to go. Shawn initiates his ending sequence to a rather weak pop if that’s what you want to call it. The elbow hits but gets two. JBL is still here and swings at Shawn with a chair. Michaels kicks it in him face but turns around to set up the RKO for the pin. The Smackdown locker room hits the ring and have Orton on their collective shoulders and there’s the inevitable gong.

This was the fall after Orton had feuded with Taker. It’s the expensive Taker return, complete with druids and a casket. A HUGE lightning bolt hits the casket which has been set up and it’s lit on fire. Taker eventually kicks it open as this is seeing vaguely familiar.

Cole then points out that Orton had Taker in a coffin and lit it on fire, which is the same story that was done seven years prior with Kane. I remember that angle and the first was light years better. Taker come to the ring and beats up the Smackdown jobbers before staring down Orton to end the show. They would have a Hell in a Cell match at Armageddon to end their feud.

Rating: B. This was good enough, but Masters and Carlito being there just didn’t work for me. Lashley was a rookie and the ending was a rip off of a far better one a few years earlier. Shawn was the only one on his team worth having so putting him in the end was the best idea. This show lost a lot with Eddie not being there and the week of buildup that they lost but that was an issue for the whole show.

The match was good, but the ending leaves a bit to be desired. Smackdown won, but so what? It means nothing really, and that’s where this match falls apart for me. The wrestling is good and it feels like a big match when you’re watching it, but at the end you realize that nothing happened at all.

Overall Rating: B. This was actually a really good show. When I’m giving the overall grade I go back and look at the card and the grades I gave them but that’s not the main thing I go on. This is a great example of why that’s the case. The matches individually other than the GM match were all very good with nothing at all not above watchable. However, there’s just something about this show that I can’t put my finger on. Something keeps this show from being great.

Maybe it’s the lack of build which wasn’t anything they could help due to Eddie, but it still takes away from the show. The wrestling here is great but the emotion isn’t there. Maybe their thoughts were on Eddie or something like that, but there’s just something missing from this show and it keeps it from being excellent. Certainly recommended, but that X factor isn’t there.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 




Crown Jewel 2019: I’ll Admit It

IMG Credit: WWE

Crown Jewel 2019
Date: October 31, 2019
Location: King Fahd International Stadium
Commentators: Corey Graves, Michael Cole

This is one of those things that we just have to get through. The wrestling isn’t the problem here as the action will likely be acceptable enough. The problem is going to be some of the decisions that are made, as WWE tends to lose their minds around here. Couple that with the fact that this is going to be built around part time wrestlers and mainstream athletes. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Battle Royal

Sunil Singh, Mojo Rawley, Erick Rowan, R-Truth, Sin Cara, The Brian Kendrick, Titus O’Neil, Tony Nese, Akira Tozawa, Shelton Benjamin, Apollo Crews, Buddy Murphy, Andrade, Drake Maverick, Eric Young, Luke Harper, Cedric Alexander, Heath Slater, Humberto Carrillo, No Way Jose

The winner gets a US Title shot at AJ Styles on the main show. Thankfully we do get a point made about the 24/7 Title being suspended during the match. It’s the usual brawl to start until Rowan tosses Maverick out first. Rowan gets sent to the apron but holds on to eliminate Slater and Nese.

Harper gets rid of Kendrick and Young, followed by Rawley and Cara going out as well. Crews gets rid of Titus and we take a break. Back with Harper and Rowan having a staredown but Jose recommends dancing. Harper gets in on it before blasting him with the discus lariat. That’s it for Jose, so Tozawa goes after Rowan by asking for a fight. Harper looks down at him and reality sets in, followed by the quick elimination. There goes Crews and Rowan shoves Murphy out as well.

Truth and Andrade follow them out and we’re down to Harper, Rowan, Singh, Carrillo and Alexander. Singh is out as well and we’re down to four. The fans like Harper so he and Rowan get rid of Alexander. Singh goes to leave but Truth steals the pin and the title (because the title was only being protected until Singh was eliminated instead of the whole match). The Mob chases Truth off and the double teaming continues. Carrillo shrugs them off though and gets rid of both monsters for the win at 12:24.

Rating: D+. Keeping these matches short(ish) is the best thing that can be done as they just aren’t going to work very well more often than not. Carrillo winning is perfectly fine and I’m sure the match with Styles is going to be fine. That’s all it needs to be as there aren’t exactly high expectations going into a match like this.

The opening video looks at the main events and little more. It’s a really standard, generic video.

The set does look awesome, as it usually does.

WWE Championship: Brock Lesnar vs. Cain Velasquez

Lesnar is defending and gets a monster pop. Rey Mysterio is here with Velasquez, who does look a little better in ring gear than he has recently (emphasis on a little). They start slowly as Lesnar has learned from what got him in trouble against Cain the first time. Lesnar takes him into the corner for some clinch fighting but Cain gets in a kick to the head to drop the champ. Ground and pound ensues but Brock grabs the Kimura for the win at 2:07.

Post match Lesnar won’t let go so Rey hits him with a chair, earning himself a toss to the floor. Brock chairs Cain down and hits the F5 onto the chair. Rey comes back in with another chair and swings it quite well for someone with one good arm. Enough shots connect to send Lesnar outside and we would have a fresh challenge if the Brand Split didn’t exist. I mean, I’m sure that’s going to last of course, right?

The Revival is ready to be named best in the world.

The Viking Raiders are ready to fight and beat everyone up.

Tag Team Turmoil

Non-title and there are nine teams with the winners getting a big trophy. Robert Roode/Dolph Ziggler and the Lucha House Party start things off with Kalisto as the odd man out. Ziggler takes Dorado into the corner to start and hits a dropkick to really take over. Roode comes in and gets caught with the Golden Rewind, allowing the House Party to take over on the arm. A gordbuster gets Roode out of trouble though and Ziggler comes back in for a Fameasser into a crossface of all things.

That’s broken up and Dorado gets up top for a high crossbody to Ziggler, allowing the diving tag (with his head) to bring in Metalik. There’s the rope walk dropkick to Roode and everything breaks down. Roode shoves Dorado off the top into a superkick from Ziggler, followed by another superkick to Metalik. The Glorious DDT gets rid of House Party at 5:45.

Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder are in third and it’s a quick Samoan drop/Blockbuster combination (with Ryder completely missing the Blockbuster part) for two on Roode. Not that it matters as the Zig Zag/spinebuster combination finishes Ryder at 6:53. Heavy Machinery is in fourth and Tucker wrestles Ziggler to the mat without much effort. Roode comes back in and Ziggler hits a cheap shot to take over though and the big guys are in trouble.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before Tucker gets taken outside for a ram into the barricade. Back in and Tucker drops Roode, allowing the tag off to Otis to start cleaning house. Otis’ shirt comes off and the jiggling starts fast. Ziggler pulls Roode to the floor before the Caterpillar, so Heavy Machinery settles for the Compactor to get rid of Roode at 13:24.

New Day is in fifth and Big E. starts fast with a battle over an abdominal stretch with Tucker. Big E. manages to stay on his feet while bending backwards and even applauds himself to show off. A double clothesline puts them both down so it’s off to Kofi vs. Otis. Kofi gets knocked down this time and the Caterpillar connects this time, meaning it’s another double tag. Tucker suplexes Big E. for two but misses a middle rope crossbody.

Kofi comes back in and there’s the Midnight Hour to get rid of Heavy Machinery at 17:32. The B Team is in sixth with Axel hitting a quick clothesline to the back of Big E.’s head to take over. Dallas grabs the chinlock but Big E. isn’t having that and pops up for the Big Ending and the elimination at 19:34.

The OC is in eighth but Kofi hits a double stomp on Anderson. Gallows pulls Big E. off the apron though and it’s the Magic Killer to finish New Day at 27:00. The Viking Raiders are the final team and it’s Gallows kneeing Erik in the ribs to start. Erik gets knocked off the apron and a snap suplex gives Gallows two back inside. The chinlock is broken up though and it’s back to Ivar to pick up the pace, including a cartwheel to show off. Erik slams Ivar onto Anderson but Gallows is back in to kick Erik down. The Magic Killer gets the pin at 32:16, marking the Raiders’ first pinfall loss in WWE.

Rating: C-. It wasn’t even that bad of a match but it was a lot of completely average stuff until a stupid ending. You spend two and a half years setting up the Raiders as these unstoppable monsters and then the OC, who weren’t even fresh, just pin them? The OC? Really? As in the team who was ready to leave earlier this year? Really not a fan of this, as the Vikings shouldn’t have lost heading into the hoss fight against the AOP.

We recap Lesnar vs. Velasquez and Mysterio cleaning house after the match.

Rey promises revenge on Lesnar.

Cesaro vs. Mansoor

Cesaro slaps him in the face and Mansoor isn’t having that so he’ll take a wristlock from Cesaro instead. Mansoor knocks him down and gets two off a standing moonsault, followed by the armdrag into the armbar. A dropkick puts Cesaro on the floor and it’s a dropkick through the ropes to keep him down. The dive through the ropes is cut off with an uppercut and it’s Mansoor being sent into the barricade.

Back in and the chinlock is broken up in a hurry so Cesaro pulls him off the middle rope for two instead. Now the chinlock can stay on for a bit and a belly to back suplex gets two more. Cesaro gets dropkicked out of the air though and the comeback is on, including an enziguri. The tornado DDT gives Mansoor two so Cesaro uppercuts him down.

Mansoor is back with a slingshot neckbreaker for another near fall but Cesaro nails Swiss Death into the Crossface. That’s broken up as well and Mansoor hits a superkick for a close two. Cesaro gets ticked off and tries a gutwrench superplex but Mansoor counters into a sunset bomb. A moonsault gives Mansoor the clean pin at 12:38.

Rating: B-. This was actually quite the fun match and Mansoor is more than good enough to hang in a regular match. He isn’t ready for the main roster or anything but being a regular on NXT wouldn’t be out of the question. This was the least surprising result on the show and there’s nothing wrong with that here. Nice match and the fans were WAY into this.

Post match Mansoor talks about waking up and knowing that this was the match of his life. He was nervous but then he came into the stadium and the fans made him ready. Now he cannot wait to see what they do next. He speaks some Arabic and the fans seem rather pleased.

Seth Rollins says the Fiend has taken him to some dark places but a little part of him likes it. No matter what happens tonight, he didn’t start the fight but he’s going to finish it.

Survivor Series will be Raw vs. Smackdown vs. NXT. I’m so thrilled.

We recap Tyson Fury vs. Braun Strowman. Fury was at the premiere of Smackdown and got into it with Strowman. Now they’re having a battle of the sports.

Tyson Fury vs. Braun Strowman

Fury comes out to It’s Your Thing by the Isley Brothers (or at least a cover of it) and is in the traditional Saudi robes. Strowman powers him into the corner to start and there’s the hard shove. Some shots to the body don’t do much to Strowman so Fury nips up (kind of) out of a wristlock. A big boot drops Fury though and reality seems to set in. Strowman hits the post, as usual, and falls to the floor, only to drop Fury with a right hand.

Fury gets some boots up to drop Strowman right back though and it’s a big boot of his own for two (he didn’t seem to know how to cover, though he did hook a leg). Strowman is right back with a sledge to the chest so Fury does the Undertaker sit up. A World’s Strongest Slam plants Fury so he bails to the floor, where Strowman hits the running shoulders. Back in and Fury nails the right hand to knock Strowman off the apron and that’s a countout at 7:59.

Rating: D. Fury tried but this really didn’t work. Other than the big right hand at the end, Fury didn’t show anything of note here, though it’s just not his sport and he’s been training for what, a few weeks at most? Fury wasn’t a disaster or anything, but it was something that felt a lot longer than it was. Strowman losing by countout is a bit of a relief though and I’ll take a small victory where I can.

Post match Strowman hits the running powerslam and Fury pops up to shout at him some more.

We recap R-Truth regaining the 24/7 Title.

Truth runs again but runs into the Singh Brothers, who steal the title back.

US Title: AJ Styles vs. Humberto Carrillo

AJ is defending and has the OC, with trophy, in his corner. Styles goes right for him and the fight is on in a hurry with a knee to the ribs taking Carrillo down. A dropkick puts AJ on the floor but he’s ready to avoid the big dive. Back in and AJ hits another knee to set up the chinlock as things settle down a bit. Carrillo gets up again but the springboard armdrag is shoved away.

A brainbuster gives AJ two but Carrillo comes right back with the handspring armdrag and a high crossbody for two. An exchange of jumping kicks to the head leaves them both down and we get a breather. They go the apron with AJ flipping him over the post, only to get caught with a dropkick.

There’s the dive to the floor to drop Styles again and Carrillo grabs a sunset flip for two back inside. The Phenomenal Blitz takes Carrillo down again and the Calf Crusher goes on. Carrillo gets to the ropes and the leg is fine enough for a jumping kick to the head. An attempted moonsault tweaks the knee though and the Phenomenal Forearm retains the title at 12:38.

Rating: C+. The completely acceptable wrestling (for the wrestlers at least) continues in a match without that shocking of a finish. There are a lot of people who could take the title from AJ but you can tell who are just the challengers of the month. It was Alexander last week and now it’s Carrillo. The OC being dominant is a good idea for the short term though as you can have someone knock them off later and wins like this will make that one mean more down the line.

Hulk Hogan dubs Byron Saxton Beautiful Byron before promising to destroy Ric Flair once and for all. Team Hogan has been training day and night with Hogan making them drink sand.

Natalya vs. Lacey Evans

I never thought I would see the day. Natalya is in her regular gear with a t-shirt over it and Lacey is in long pants, a long sleeved shirt and a Lacey shirt. The fans seem rather into this one, second only to the Mansoor match so far. They shake hands to start and Lacey spins out of a wristlock but gets rolled up for two. That gets another round of applause and a second handshake before a headlock takeover puts Lacey down. That’s broken up so Natalya sends Lacey outside and strikes her pose.

Lacey knocks the leg out though and nails the slingshot dropkick, followed by the chinlock. A slingshot elbow gives Lacey two and it’s time to work on the arm. That’s broken up and Lacey takes the belly to back drop into the stepover dropkick. It’s too early for the Sharpshooter so Lacey grabs a suplex to set up the double jump moonsault for two more. Lacey loads it up again but gets pulled off the ropes this time, allowing Natalya to nail the discus lariat. Now the Sharpshooter goes on for the tap at 7:19.

Rating: C. The match was pretty paint by numbers and could have been on any given house show. That’s completely not the point though as this is one of those things that seemed impossible and yet they managed to make it happen. I have no idea if it is going to lead anywhere or make any real difference, but they did something and that’s more than you would have expected possible. Well done and it actually is historic for a change.

Post match we see a bunch of young girls cheering and there is a lot of emotion from both women.

Team Hogan vs. Team Flair

Hogan: Roman Reigns, Shorty G., Ali, Rusev, Ricochet

Flair: Randy Orton, Shinsuke Nakamura, Bobby Lashley, King Corbin, Drew McIntyre

One fall to a finish and Ricochet is in full body gear due to tattoos. Nakamura and Gable start things off with Gable going straight for the ankle but getting kneed down for his efforts. Corbin comes in for a few shots before handing it off to Lashley. Gable gets over for the tag to Rusev and Lashley brings McIntyre in as fast as he can. A spinwheel kick puts McIntyre down and it’s Ali coming in to work on McIntyre’s arm.

McIntyre takes over with the power and shoves him hard onto the apron to really put him in trouble. Orton gets in some shots to the face on the floor and Nakamura/McIntyre add in their own kicks to the ribs. Ali is fine enough to dive over for the hot tag to Ricochet so the pace can pick up. A few rooms of the house are cleaned but Corbin gets in a cheap shot so McIntyre can hit the reverse Alabama slam.

The beating is on, including Corbin’s required chinlock. The chokeslam is countered into a sunset flip to give Ricochet two so Corbin blasts him with a clothesline. Flair busts out the strut to a big reaction but Ricochet gets a boot up in the corner, followed by a spinning kick to Orton’s jaw. The hot tag brings in Reigns to clean house with right hands, clotheslines and a big boot/legdrop to Corbin. Everything breaks down and the RKO is blocked, setting up the Superman Punch for two.

Reigns gets taken to the floor so Rusev makes the save, leaving him to beat up Lashley. That earns Rusev a low bridge but Reigns is back in with a Superman Punch to Lashley. The big dive over the top takes everyone down and another Superman Punch is countered into the RKO for a close two. You don’t see that one kicked out of very often. The Punt is loaded up but Gable grabs the boot. Ali and Ricochet take Orton down and hit stereo dives to the floor. Reigns spears Orton for the pin at 19:49.

Rating: B-. Obvious ending aside (it was only about who was going to get the pin on whom), this was a perfectly enjoyable and at times even good, tag match. I was expecting this to headline the show for the sake of star power but it’s not like Hogan beating Flair was any secret. At least Flair didn’t get physical, which is the best choice for everyone involved.

Team Hogan celebrates.

The announcers talk about Survivor Series.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. the Fiend. Rollins defeated him in the Cell in one of the dumbest things that WWE has done in years and now they’re having a Falls Count Anywhere rematch which can’t be stopped for any reason. On Halloween. With a supernatural character. There is no way they can screw this up, so let’s see how they manage to screw this up.

Universal Title: Seth Rollins vs. The Fiend

Rollins is defending and it’s Falls Count Anywhere. They’re doing the red light deal again too, because that worked so well last time. Fiend is still in his jacket to start and hits Rollins in the throat. A headbutt puts Rollins down and the jacket comes off. The Sling Blade connects but Fiend is right back with the running crossbody. They fight outside with Fiend being sent into an LED screen, followed by the fighting around ringside.

Rollins loads up some tables on top of each other but opts to grab a chair and sledgehammer. Fiend avoids getting his skull caved in and loads up the Arabic announce table. The running backsplash only hits table though and Rollins gets one. Rollins goes up but gets shoved through both tables for the big crash. Fiend takes forever to go over and get him but opts to pull back the floor mats instead.

That of course means a Stomp onto the concrete for no cover as they fight onto a platform. Sister Abigail onto the platform gives Fiend two so they go up to the stage. Another Stomp is no sold so Rollins hits a pair of superkicks. Another two Stomps slow Fiend down and it’s another to keep him down for a few seconds.

There’s another two of them and a series of superkicks sends Wyatt into the tech area for the explosions. Some fire extinguishers are brought out and more pyro goes off, with Rollins getting caught in the eye. Fiend pops up like a monster and grabs the Mandible Claw, setting up Sister Abigail on the floor for the pin and the title at 21:26.

Rating: B-. I’m actually shocked here. They can figure out the Raw/Smackdown situation later but what matters here is they changed the title as they should have here. This should have taken place in the Cell but at least WWE figured out that something needed to be done. It was also a heck of a fight, even if they had the ridiculous spamming of finishers from Rollins. What matters here though is the title change and they got that right, so maybe they’re not completely insane.

The lights go out and come back on so Fiend can pose with the title.

A lot of pyro ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I’ll gladly admit I was wrong about this one as they realized they screwed up in the Cell and switched gears while also delivering a pretty good show. There were a few historical points on the card and nothing was terrible (Fury vs. Strowman was bad but there’s a big asterisk with it), but more importantly it feels like something mattered here, which is one of the biggest problems with this show most of the time. It’s no classic and isn’t worth watching, but they addressed some of the bigger problems and had an entertaining enough show, making this a miracle by comparison to the rest of the shows.

Results

Brock Lesnar b. Cain Velasquez – Kimura

OC won Tag Team Turmoil last eliminating the Viking Raiders

Mansoor b. Cesaro – Moonsault

Tyson Fury b. Braun Strowman via countout

AJ Styles b. Humberto Carrillo – Phenomenal Forearm

Natalya b. Lacey Evans – Sharpshooter

Team Hogan b. Team Flair – Spear to Orton

The Fiend b. Seth Rollins – Sister Abigail onto the floor

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series Count-Up – 1991 (2012 Redo): This Still Gets On My Nerves

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 1991
Date: November 27, 1991
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 17,500
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

Gorilla and Bobby talk for a bit.

Team Ric Flair vs. Team Roddy Piper

Ric Flair, Ted DiBiase, The Mountie, The Warlord

Roddy Piper, Bret Hart, Davey Boy Smith, Virgil

Sherri is sent to the back and Roddy brings in Smith. The good guys work over the arm of DiBiase with Virgil of all people getting the biggest pop. After all four go in they start going around again with all four getting in another set of shots on the arm. Bret stays in but misses a knee in the corner to put himself in trouble. They trade near falls before Bret takes Ted right back down by the arm.

Rating: B. Gah this was going AWESOME until the pretty lame ending. Having Flair be the sole survivor is a smart move though as it makes the fans hate him even more. This was a GREAT setup though and was on pace to be a classic before the ending. To be fair though, at the pace they were going the match would have been an hour long if they were going to do a full version. Still though, what we got was very good.

Gorilla thinks Tuesday in Texas may be on TV! I think he might be wrong here.

Team Mustafa vs. Team Slaughter

Colonel Mustafa, Berzerker, Skinner, Hercules

Sgt. Slaughter, Tito Santana, Jim Duggan, Texas Tornado

Skinner is an alligator wrestler from the Everglades and Berzerker is a crazy viking who tried to stab Undertaker with a sword. A lot of these guys are on their way out. Hercules would be in WCW by May, Tornado would job to the stars until leaving in July, as would Mustafa (Iron Sheik). The rest of the guys would do nothing of note for the rest of their time in the company.

Rating: F. The match was awful, it was never in doubt, and the biggest deal on the heel team was Skinner, who would get an Intercontinental Title shot soon after this. What a horrible match and one of the most worthless ones in the history of the show so far, which is covering quite a bit of ground. Nothing to see here at all.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan

Rating: D. Yeah this match completely sucked but we have a new champion and a reason to watch Flair vs. Hogan, which never happened for various reason. Hogan would beat Undertaker for the title at Tuesday in Texas six days later, but the title would be held up and decided in the Rumble, where Flair would win it and set up Wrestlemania. Bad match, but a BIG moment.

People come out to check on Hogan as Gorilla rips into Flair. Hogan takes a while to leave, likely to let the fans get over some of their shock.

Roddy is in the back and goes on a big rant against Tunney and Flair andUndertaker.

Team Nasty Boys vs. Team Rockers

Nasty Boys, Beverly Brothers

Rockers, Bushwhackers

Gorilla and Bobby plug Tuesday in Texas again.

Legion of Doom/Big Boss Man vs. IRS/Natural Disasters

This is your main event people. Let that sink in for a minute. The LOD are the Tag Team Champions and IRS (Irwin R. Schyster, a tax auditor) and Boss Man are having a worthless midcard feud. Boss Man and IRS start things off with the tax man getting thrown all over the place. Off to Animal vs. Earthquake which wakes the crowd up a bit.

Earthquake wants to fight IRS now but walks off with Typhoon instead, making it the LOD vs. IRS. Hawk powerslams IRS down but a charge goes shoulder first into the post. Hawk gets sent face first into the steps as we continue to fill time by having IRS look like he has a chance. We hit the chinlock as the announcers talk about Thanksgiving dinner. A not very hot tag brings in Animal who cleans whatever is left in the house. IRS tries to walk out but runs into Boss Man in the aisle. Back in and Hawk hits a top rope clothesline for the win.

Gene is in the bowels of the building with Bearer and Undertaker. Hogan will rest in peace. In Texas. They look in a casket to end the show.

Ratings Comparison

Team Flair vs. Team Piper

Original: A-

Redo: B

Team Slaughter vs. Team Mustafa

Original: F

Redo: F

Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan

Original: C-

Redo: D

Team Nasty Boys vs. Team Rockers

Original: D

Redo: D

Legion of Doom/Big Boss Man vs. IRS/Natural Disasters

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating:

Original: D+

Redo: D-

A little worse this time, but the same problems still plague this show. Screw you Vince.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/10/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1991-here-lies-hogan/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series Count-Up – 1991 (Original): The Dead Man Walks

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 1991
Date: November 27, 1991
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 17,500
Commenators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

Ok, so due to Microsoft and their annoying automatic updates that no one actually knows what they’re good for, I lost 91-94, so this is the second time I’ve reviewed these four shows. Therefore if I seem a bit ticked off, that’s why. Anyway, the main thing here is simple: Vince has more or less given up on the idea of having all Survivor Series matches and has given us a traditional main event match, in this case, Taker challenging Hogan for the world title.

Also, Flair has jumped ship to the WWF in a huge botch on WCW’s part. Finally, the hottest feud in the world right now is Jake Roberts vs. Randy Savage, but I’ll get to why I’m ticked off about that in just a few minutes. Other than that, the show is pretty much what you would expect.

The roster is changing a bit though; with it being more like the early 90s look than what we had seen for years before. It was a pretty bad show when I watched it two weeks ago, so maybe it’s somehow improved since then.

We get the logo and everything with a huge banner over it saying 5th Annual. Is it really something we need to know that badly? Within 30 seconds of the start of the show we’re hearing about the Roberts vs. Macho situation. So here’s the idea: Savage lost the career ending match at Mania and is officially retired. However, he’s trying to get reinstated since no one really stays retired (are you listening Ric Flair?).

Roberts had been supposed to feud with the Warrior for a huge program but Warrior was a jerk and got fired, which you can read about in my Summerslam 91 review. Anyway, they instead paired him with Savage for this. This past Sunday (this show is airing on Wednesday which was the tradition back in the day) Roberts got Savage into the ring and tied him up in the ropes before pulling out a cobra. Before I go on, does that sound like some latent sexual issues or is it just me?

Anyway, Savage get bit by the cobra and they can’t get it off of him. The crowd is so into this it’s unreal. Eventually they get him out of it and Savage tries to fight back but can’t stand up because of the “venom”. In one of the absolute funniest moments I can ever remember in wrestling, Vince is FREAKING over this and actually doing a great job on the mic which is a lot more than he usually does.

However, as Savage is being put on the stretcher, we cut to a kid in the audience crying and Vince absolutely loses it. He’s cracking up and since Piper ran to the ring to help Savage, there’s no one to bail him out here. It’s just great as he’s trying to stay serious but just can’t do it because he’s holding back laughter.

I guarantee that whoever did that cut was fired. I can’t imagine they weren’t. So anyway, after all that (they showed the entire segment which was about 4 minutes long), we go to Jack Tunney who says that this is his fault and he’s to blame for what Jake did.

Now we get to the big part: Savage will not be allowed to wrestle tonight, and Jake has been pulled from his match as well. HOWEVER, Savage is reinstated and will face Roberts at ANOTHER PPV called Tuesday in Texas, SIX FREAKING DAYS AFTER THIS SHOW. Remember, the incident that they’re referencing was three days prior to this. They’re changing the main event three days before the show so that they can hook in more PPV buys for ANOTHER show six days after it. That my friends is nonsense.

I’m sorry but that just doesn’t work. The fans are already paying 30 dollars for this show and they don’t get the real main event out of it? Hogwash. Instead Vince says for only 20 dollars more you can see the main event that you paid for here. I get that Vince was running low on money at this point, but there comes a point where you’re just screwing the fan too much. This is stupid on all levels. If you want to do this, give the people more than 72 hours notice.

How many people do you think might have missed Superstars and not known about this until after the show had started and their money had been paid? Again, that’s nonsense. I’m legit ticked off again over this, with the only thing that’s keeping me calm being Tunney’s licking of his lips in this promo. It’s just weird looking. He looks like he’s getting ready to eat an ice cream cone or something. This whole segment was just designed to tick  off fans.

But hey! In six days, you can pay us MORE money to see this match, so make sure you order the other show. Gorilla and Bobby plug the show even more before we start our first match, 6 minutes into the show. Ok make that 7.

Roddy Piper’s Team vs. Ric Flair’s Team

Piper: Bret Hart, Virgil, Davey Boy Smith
Flair: Ted DiBiase, Warlord, Mountie

The feuds actually match up here as Piper and Flair were feuding, DiBiase and Virgil had just finished feuding, Hart and the Mountie would clash over the IC belt in a few weeks and Smith and Warlord were arguing over who was stronger. Wow a match that actually works out well in that area. I don’t know what to say. Sherri is with DiBiase here.

Actually, all four heels have managers, with (going in order listed above) Mr. Perfect, Sherri, Harvey Whippleman and Jimmy Hart. They can’t stay at ringside though. Flair is out now with a censored belt. Ok so this deserves an in depth explanation as well I guess. Back in the 80s, wrestling was based on the territory system as you likely know. Most companies were part of the NWA but all had their own champions and talent (think of it like the NCAA with its conferences).

However, there was still an NWA world champion that went around the country defending his title everywhere. This you likely know or have at least heard of. Now like I said, there were all kinds of territories. One guy in the south started to buy a bunch of them and join them into a superterriory.

This man’s name was Jim Crockett who you’ve likely heard of. He turned it into what you now know as WCW, but it wasn’t known as that at the time. Anyway, he tried to go to war with Vince but just didn’t have the money to do it. He eventually sold to Ted Turner, who changed the name to World Championship Wrestling.

Turner slowly started to fade away from the NWA stuff as he and Crockett had realized the same thing: WCW was the NWA at this point. He owned all the talent and the NWA championship (the big gold belt was made by Crockett for Flair. Before that they had used a different one.) Now at the time, Flair was still the NWA champion, but was also the WCW champion.

This was represented by the same belt though, as more or less it was the same title but officially it wasn’t. It’s very complicated no matter how you look at it so if that doesn’t make sense to you, don’t be surprised. So Turner brought in a bunch of people that had no freaking clue how to run a wrestling company, with the main one being Jim Herd. Herd looked at Flair and thought that he was washed up and past his prime.

This was abdsurd as well since Flair was not only world champion but the top draw still. Herd thought the Nature Boy gimmick was stupid and wanted to change Flair into, and I’m not making this up, a bald gladiator. Yes, he wanted to drop one of the most famous gimmicks in history to make him a stupid character.

As Kevin Sullivan put it, “after we change Flair’s gimmick, let’s go change Babe Ruth’s number.” Flair, having a brain, told Herd that this wasn’t going to work. Herd, being the idiot that he was, decided he knew more wrestling than Flair and told him that Flair would do it or be fired.

Now this is where Flair had him. Since, like everyone that knew what they were talking about, Flair knew that he could walk straight into the WWF and be launched right to the top of the show, he didn’t back down. Herd fired him and Vince got a nice big present called Ric Flair just handed to him. Now let’s get to the interesting part. When he was fired, Flair was still WCW and NWA champion.

Yes, Herd was dumb enough to fire him BEFORE changing the title. See what kind of idiot he was? He was stripped of the WCW Title which was then put in a match between Luger and Barry Windham, which was booed out of the building with chants of WE WANT FLAIR! The winner didn’t matter, because no one was going to take them seriously as champion, and why should they have? They never beat Flair for the title so they were in essence fighting for the number one contender spot.

No one bought it and the title was hurt badly for the next year and a half since instead of watching fake champions, they turned the channel to USA to see how the real WCW champion did in the WWF. Now the REAL interesting part lies in the NWA title. Like I said, Flair held both titles which were represented by the same belt.

The NWA had a policy for its world champions: you win the title, you pay 25,000 dollars as a deposit on it. The deal was done to prevent people from showing up in other companies with the title. In other words, you rented it. Once you lost the belt you got the money back with interest on it.

Now that’s fine and good. Flair paid the deposit and all was well and good. However, once he was fired from WCW he was stripped of the belt and was told to return it to the NWA. Flair said he’d be glad to do it as soon as he was given his money back. Problem: the NWA didn’t have it. Flair says well then you don’t have a belt either. He took it to Vince and used it in a gimmick, calling himself the REAL world’s champion.

The NWA panicked since there was no way they could let this happen. They took Flair to court over it and were laughed out of the room since they had absolutely no case. They made a deal with Flair and weren’t living up to their end of it. Therefore, there was nothing they could do to keep Flair from using the title on WWF TV. It was his property so he could do whatever he wanted with it.

Eventually Flair went back to WCW and let them use the belt after they paid him what he was owed. The big gold belt became the WCW Title and the rest is history. WCW left the NWA in about 1993 and the NWA tried to revive itself with a tournament in Philadelphia. I think you know what happened there.

Anyway, the point of this was that during this time, the NWA got a temporary injunction against Flair to keep him from using the big gold belt but the angle kept going anyway with other belts being used in its place. Tonight it’s a tag title, which is blacked out but at times you can see the edges of it. How weird would that have been? Flair is just standing there holding up one of the tag titles. Oh yeah we’ve got a match to do too. Let’s get to it.

Hart’s pop is INSANE. They knew what they had here and that would be made apparent as next year at this time he would be world champion. We start off with DiBiase vs. Piper. That’s a very interesting match that I don’t think ever had a big time feud. They of course have a great match here as my amazement never ends as to how DiBiase never got a title run. They of course have a great mini-match here since they’re both awesome.

Sherri comes in for interference but it of course backfires since Piper was practically a main eventer and such things don’t bother him at all. Now we get Virgil, who for some reason gets a pop. This is even more reason for me to hate what they’re pulling tonight. The crowd is white hot, so instead of giving them a big match, let’s give it to people in a week. Yeah that’s very good work there guys. Way to support your fans.

The face team spends about three minutes just killing DiBiase with all three guys getting in a lot of work on him. Finally he gets out and we get Flair vs. Hart. Even back then we knew it was something special. Bret was so on at this time that it’s unbelievable. The Heenan cheering for Flair is just funny stuff. Now the faces take their turns beating up on Flair. About 5 minutes straight is just faces beating on DiBiase and Flair.

Despite that, this is very entertaining either way as both guys are big time heels so the beatings work well and the crowd is WAY into this. Piper comes in to beat up Flair some and it’s so loud you can barely hear much. He finally gets out and we have Warlord and Bulldog in a test of strength. Due to some expected heel cheating, Bulldog is in trouble now as the Mountie continues to crack me up with how completely over the top he is with his gimmick. It’s so ridiculously insane that it’s greatness.

We get a funny bit as we see Jimmy in the back PANICKING since he can’t be out there with the Mountie. Managers really are a lost art indeed today. They’re something that can really enhance a character yet for some reason they’re never used anymore. I don’t get that. Being a manager requires two things: being able to talk and being able to take a beating once in awhile. Seriously, is that something that sounds next to impossible or next to that difficult even? I don’t get it.

It’s just not that hard to me, at least in theory. Instead we get people like Santino and Abraham Washington. Why not make one of them a manager? Nope, instead everything has to be about comedy instead of enhancing a character. Yep, you have to love that.

Bret comes in so Mountie bails as fast as he can, giving us Bret vs. DiBiase again so I can’t complain. Smith comes in after about 8 seconds of this as Mountie is tagged in. It’s brawl time and note: Gorilla says that the legal men are Flair and Smith, which would be wrong. Anyway, Smith hits the powerslam on Mountie but Flair goes to the tope and hits a double axe handle shot to the back of Davey’s head.

He rolls him over and pins him as Gorilla is freaking out about how Flair wasn’t legal, despite him saying that he was not 20 seconds before this. I love the confusion that is Gorilla Monsoon a lot of the time. Piper immediately runs in to beat on Flair, despite him not being legal in the match but who cares about something stupid like legality? All four people beat on Piper for a bit as the fans are still way into this match. That’s a good sign that after about eleven minutes we’re still this into a match.

Piper puts the figure four on Flair to a HUGE pop. Virgil comes in to fight Mountie who is terrified of him. For some reason, no one wants to fight Virgil. Why not? The guy just wasn’t that big of a deal. All that mattered in his career was that he beat DiBiase one time. That’s all anyone ever actually cared about and it was indeed a cool moment. However, once that angle ended, which it had by this point since DiBiase got the belt back, he was just Virgil, a bald guy that threw decent punches.

There’s just nothing really to market there and it turned into nothing at all because there was just nothing they could do with him at this point. It’s the quintessential difference between having a gimmick and being a character. A gimmick is something like Repo Man. He was something that you could throw in with anyone at all and the gimmick would work fine. John Cena is a character. He’s just a man that goes out there and wrestles really well.

There’s more depth to him, but it’s harder to put him with someone because you have to build something up with him. Also, it takes away from the creativity of the storylines with him as you can’t really do much other than have it be about respect or a challenge or so and so wants the title etc. It leads to some very boring and generic storylines.

There’s no right or wrong answer about what’s better, but for someone like Virgil with limited skills and charisma, a gimmick would have worked much better for him. The same holds true for Cena as a gimmick would be awful for him. It’s usually the bigger a star you are, the less you need a gimmick. He and Flair go at it for a bit and as usual, Flair loses at first only to make his comeback and look dominant.

A lot of people say that Flair’s style is boring. I disagree. Yes, he does the same stuff a lot of the time, but how many truly bad Flair matches can you remember, and I’m not talking about when he was all old and likely not legally considered alive. I’m talking about when he was in shape and not old. Think about it: the guy had good matches because he had a formula.

Flair gets beaten on, he makes a small comeback, gets beaten on again, makes a big comeback, goes for the leg, gets the figure four, the face gets to the ropes, and then the finish. The matches worked though and that’s all that mattered. Then you would get idiots like Dusty Rhodes who of course just couldn’t do things the intelligent way and had to have his style of match with Flair, which made them a lot worse.

Those aren’t Flair’s fault. Dusty is to be blamed for those since he’s the one that screwed them up by having to wrestle his horrible style. Dang I’m going on a lot of tangents here. Anyway, Hart does the nice thing and throws Virgil back in to get beaten on some more.

Full nelson goes on but Bret breaks it up to let Piper pin Warlord in the exact same thing that got rid of Bulldog. Well played Hitman. Everybody beats on DiBiase a bit more, with even Virgil getting in some solid stuff. Flair however just ends that as he becomes my hero. Heenan is singing Flair’s praises which never gets old as he even threatens to have Gorilla thrown out. The response of silence is just funny.

Virgil gets beaten on for about three minutes to set up the ending that I hate. He gets DiBiase down and heads for the corner. Both Piper and Flair come in for a big fight, but then the other four come in. Flair gets knocked to the floor and we have a big brawl. Then to end the match, 5 people are disqualified except for Flair because he was on the floor, making him the sole survivor. I get that they wanted to push Flair, but this match was so awesome up to this point that I wanted to see them go longer.

It’s not like they were short on time. Later on the tag team match gets twenty minutes. You could have given this another ten and it would have been fine, but then again, I’m no professional.

Rating: A-. This match was awesome. The crowd was way into it, the wrestlers were all on fire, the feuds made perfect sense, the pacing was good, and then the ending screwed all that up. Yeah here the main issue is the ending, which was just flat out bad. It put Flair over which was the point of the match, but I wish there was another way they could have done it. Either way, this was a very fun and entertaining match. Now if only the rest of the show is this good, which I doubt.

Savage and Liz say to buy Tuesday In Texas. Screw you both. Actually no, just screw Vince and his greed.

Team Slaughter vs. Team Mustafa

Slaughter, Duggan, Texas Tornado, Tito Santana
Colonel Mustafa, Berzerker, Skinner, Hercules

Oh this is going to be bad. It’s like the 80s died and this is the corpse. Basically, it’s America vs. not America here, with Mustafa being more commonly known as Iron Sheik. He had managed Slaughter during his heel run but now Slaughter is red white and blue again so all is fine and dandy. Duggan makes sense to be there, Tornado and Santana are midcard faces. Berzerker, Skinner and Hercules…eh they’re just there to fill in the dates their contracts say they have to work.

Yeah this is going to be pretty bad. Look at the face team. It’s a former world champion, a former NWA champion, a two time IC champion, and Duggan who was always in the upper midcard. They’re against a guy that used to be world champion but that’s not mentioned here and three career jobbers. Yeah this is going to go GREAT. I love how Slaughter can go so evil and then in just a few months he’s a beloved face again. Yeah it’s stupider than it sounds.

The most entertaining part about this match is Gorilla and Heenan arguing. You can tell they’re fairly bored out there and I can’t blame them at all. This match is just boring. There’s no point to it, there’s no reason to want to watch it, and there’s nothing of interest going on. You can tell this was just thrown together and that’s never a good thing. I don’t care about seeing these people fight because they’re just beating on each other with no particular rhyme or reason.

Heenan says some lines about Middle Eastern people that are borderline racist but not quite. Now we get to the best part of the match: the part where the bookers thought it was ok to have Sheik in there for over two minutes straight. Seriously, why? The guy can barely move and he’s going to carry the match? Yeah I think you’re getting why I hate this imbecile. They fill in the void by talking about the Taker vs. Hogan match which is fan better and more interesting.

Sheik gets pinned by a Slaughter clothesline that wasn’t anything special at all. Yeah, this might be the worst Survivor Series match of all time. It’s just flat out boring in all aspects. After about 5 minutes since Sheik got beaten, the other three heels are dispatched in less than two minutes total. Duggan dances around like this is a big deal. Apparently he was captain?

Rating: F. This was just awful. It wasn’t interesting, there was no story, the winners were never once in doubt, and it was just not any good. This was just completely pointless on all levels and was just there to fill in about 20 minutes counting the introductions. Egads what a horrible match.

The winning team walks down the hallway and says they can’t wait to see this match on video. Yeah that wasn’t pointless at all.

Jake Roberts says you should buy Tuesday in Texas. Somehow this takes five minutes to say.

We recap Hogan vs. Taker. They don’t mention how he got the title shot, but they make it obvious that Flair is going to be involved in this. On the Funeral Parlor, Taker’s segment, Flair confronted Hogan which led to Taker beating him down with the urn. Savage and Piper ran out to help him and couldn’t really do anything.

Savage hits Taker with the chair but Taker just knocks it away. That was awesome. Also, Taker rips the cross off the neck of Hogan, which is a direct homage to Andre 4 years prior to this. Taker was billed as undefeated here, despite having lost a bunch of matches to Warrior.

WWF Title: Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan

So this is the first non Survivor Series match in the history of the show, which I think was what was needed. Since it’s the main event, of course it’s the shortest match on the show. We could have a problem here though as neither guy is going to sell crap here. Gorilla tries to convince us that they’re the same size. That’s just amusing. He goes on to say that Hogan has quickness and agility. I’m sorry but that’s just hilarious.

Hogan looks scared to death which is awesome. Bearer of course gets in his shots as Taker is in control. You have to remember that he’s only been around about a year at this point. This would be like Cena vs. Swagger in the main event of a major PPV for the title. Apparently it’s a big deal that Hogan can’t slam Taker despite him hitting Hogan as he goes up. Yeah that’s not a big deal at all. Taker gets clotheslined over the ropes and lands on his feet.

That’s always a cool looking spot and it makes it look like the move did nothing at all. The never ending debate about what’s in the urn continues. Was that ever answered? Taker’s tattoos interest me. Given his gimmick, what must that day in the tattoo place have been like?

Gorilla is of course freaking out over Bearer as Heenan says his monitor keeps kicking in and out. Monsoon says he’s going to start kicking Heenan in and out in a bit. Those two are just great together. There’s a Hogan lookalike at ringside who is leading cheers. It’s really quite amusing. Taker uses a smother on Hogan. That’s an interesting move as he just covers Hogan’s face with his hand.

That’s both good and bad as it looks a lot more effective than some moves do, while at the same time really being nothing at all. Heenan naturally can’t hear Monsoon, which is odd as he has that big headset on. Ok the smother doesn’t need to go on for two minutes. Taker does the eye roll that never gets old. Hogan makes his comeback but after more interference he takes a tombstone. Naturally he pops right up and starts his finishing sequence.

Bearer’s reaction to Hogan popping up is just great. As he goes for the legdrop, Flair comes out and touches his belt. Hogan, feeling a sense of animalistic pride, goes out and stops him. He puts Taker down again and goes for the leg but Bearer grabs him.

As he’s got the referee, Flair puts in a chair and Taker tombstones him on it for the title to more or less kill Hulkamania. Taker’s slow walk to the back with the belt is nothing short of greatness. Also, if Hogan isn’t legit hurt here, he needs an acting award. He looks completely gone.

Rating: C-. Again, this is a match where the historical aspect far outweighs the wrestling that you saw on display. Hogan losing at this point was a big deal, but he was getting very little reaction in this match. His time had simply gone by this point and it wasn’t working anymore.

That’s all fine and good, so Vince decided to take a BIG gamble and have him lose here. There would be a rematch in 6 days, but Hogan would only hold the title for a few days before it was declared vacant with the winner of the Rumble getting it. Hogan wouldn’t hold it again for over a year.

All the faces say they’re going to win.

All the heels say they’re going to win.

Tunney announces the rematch with Hogan and Taker for next Tuesday. Yep, it’s only 20 dollars and you get two main events, which you were supposed to get tonight, but screw that idea.

Nasty Boys/Beverly Brothers vs. Bushwackers/Rockers

The Rockers are on the verge of splitting up at this point with the Barber Shop happening in just under two months. As for the other three teams, they’re just there. Yes, this is the match that gets over 20 minutes and is the longest of the night. What in the world was Vince on tonight? This makes tonight even more of a slap in the face of the fans as we get 23 minutes of this and no Savage/Roberts.

Yeah that’s just great Vince, thanks for screwing over every person that pair their money to see this match. The Rockers are just ungodly over here, so of course they were being split up. We start off with Butch and Knobbs. Gorilla says no one knows more about surviving than the Bushwackers. Um, what? They do their comedy act as I can’t believe they still had jobs at this point. Somehow they would last until 1994.

Yep, no one cares about this match at all, but since the theme of the night seems to be how can we screw the audience over even more than we have earlier on in the night, it of course goes on and on and on. Luke, who once licked my at a house show, is gone fairly early due to a Brian Knobbs flying clothesline. Yep, that’s the kind of match that this is going to be: the kind where a flying clothesline that more or less sucked can get an elimination.

Can’t you tell how excited I am to be reviewing this match AGAIN? Oh I’m in heaven here people! Anyway, Marty comes in then and is looking either confused or stoned out of his mind. It’s likely both. Heenan, being as bored as ever, starts an argument with himself.

Heenan goes on to say that had Hogan not gone after Flair he would have won, which is likely correct. After more bad offense from both teams, Butch is put out following a weird double team move. It was supposed to start with a backdrop and end with a facebuster, but instead it looked like a bad botch. It was kind of like a 3D but nowhere near as cool looking or effective.

I think the Beverlies were supposed to be rich guys but I’m not sure. We’re down to Rockers vs. all four. Shawn starts getting his head handed to him as I’m sure Becca would love to steal it but that’s a different story. After getting beaten on forever, Shawn hooks a quick backslide and pins Beau. So now it’s Marty’s turn to get beaten up on for a good while as still nothing happens. We’re nearly 20 minutes into this and Marty puts on an armbar.

Yeah and you wonder why Shawn was given the big push. Shawn gets the tag leading to all five guys being in there at once. During this, Marty slams Sags but his feet hit Shawn in the face to let him get rolled up for the pin. Shawn is MAD. He looks like he’s about to kill Marty but it doesn’t happen and Shawn goes to the back to leave it at three on one.

Jannetty fights as much as he can but even after some cool looking spots, he goes out to a bad small package. Seriously, it just looked awful. Marty’s shoulder was up and yet he got counted down anyway. It was just bad on all levels.

Rating: D. This was just BORING. Look at the opening match and then look at this one. The first one was a minute shorter yet I had FAR more to say about it. This was just boring and it’s a great example of how two matches can be completely different. The first one was interesting, sharp and fun. This was long, boring and sloppy. Granted it could be more about a lack of talent in this one but I digress.

This was just not good and there was absolutely NO need to give this nearly 25 minutes. You had a great match to open the show that would have been an A+ had it been given a few more minutes. The world title match could have used another 2-3 minutes. Yeah I know I say that a lot and in most cases there just isn’t enough time to go around. In this case, there should have been all kinds of time to go around but instead it got wasted here. That’s inexcusable.

With nothing else to say or do, it’s main event time.

Legion of Doom/Big Boss Man vs. IRS/Natural Disasters

Yep, this is the main event. Even at a house show this is a weak match, but here at the “Let’s screw the fans show”, it’s the main event. Apparently this was supposed to be Sid on the face team and Roberts on the heel team. Sid got hurt so they were going to put Savage in, but due to the move on Sunday, which means Vince’s greed, he got pulled and they took off Roberts too, since IRS is FAR ahead of Roberts on the company totem pole.

Anyway, IRS and Boss Man start, despite having no animosity at this point in time. LOD and the Disasters were feuding, but other than that, there’s little point to this. I really want this to end soon. Nope, apparently we’re in for the long match here as it’s generic offense all around to start. Yep, again, no one really cares about this match because we haven’t been given a reason to care.

The announcers clearly aren’t interested in the match at all as they bicker. Rule of thumb: the more bickering you hear between the announcers, the more bored they are. Finally after five minutes of people hitting each other and doing shoulder blocks, we get something interesting as Boss Man has IRS in trouble but he gets a metal briefcase to the head and is pinned. Unfortunately this messes up Gorilla’s rant about how Flair stole the title from Hogan.

Also, apparently there has to be something in the briefcase because it being made of metal isn’t enough to knock out Boss Man. Yeah that makes sense. So now it’s LOD against the three of them. Since they’re the tag champions at the moment, I doubt they’ll lose. As I say this, we get the fourth plug for Tuesday in Texas. We get it already guys.

Vince wants our money and if we want to see the big matches we were promised we have to pay another 20 dollars next week. As if we haven’t had enough excitement in this match, it’s time for a BEARHUG. Gorilla: I think he’s wasting time with this hold. I would agree if the last word was match. IRS goes for the briefcase again but it misses and hits Typhoon in the head and eliminates him. Quake is TICKED.

He’s mad enough that he leaves with Typhoon. So it’s IRS 1-2 with the tag team champions. What happens of course? It goes on for 6 minutes. My goodness give me a break. Finally the LOD wake up and hits a top rope clothesline to end this which Gorilla says was inevitable. See, even he knew this was how it was going to end. Hey let’s plug Texas again. Heenan says it’ll be better than tonight. It couldn’t be much worse.

Rating: D. Again, this was BORING. There was no point to this being a six man. If they wanted to just have the faces win to end the show, do the smart thing and just make this a tag team title match. A few things are accomplished by doing that. Number one, it makes the match at least seem important.

Sure the LOD would keep the belts, but at least it would have had a sense of meaning to it instead of just a random match like this. Second, it would have been far more logical than this. Anyway, this was just bad and boring, but the faces won and the fans went home happy, so that’s good I guess.

Gene is in the catacombs of the arena. Joe Louis Arena has catacombs? Cool? Anyway, Bearer says that Hulkamania died tonight and plugs Texas to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. And that’s being generous. The first match on this show was awesome. It goes downhill fast. I don’t know what the heck they were thinking on this show. Wait, yes I do. The fans will buy one PPV. That means they’ll but a second. Seriously, this was sickening to see from the WWF. There’s no call for pulling the big match three days before the show just to have a one on one match six days later. I’m sorry but that’s not right.

Also, it was a Survivor Series match tonight. How hard would it have been to have them in there but just have them do a double count out with Jake running away or a double DQ or something like that? You give the people what they paid to see, you tease them with the big match just a bit more, and THEN you put the big match on the card in six days. That’s fine with me, but don’t advertise this as being the big match between Randy and Jake and then not have it.

Let them have their quick thing here and then let them do the match Tuesday. That’s all well and good. Other than that, this historic moment with Taker winning his first title mixed with an awesome opening match isn’t enough to make this work anything though, so it’s not recommended at all. The first match is worth seeing though.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 




Smackdown – October 25, 2019: Oh This Was Bad.

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: October 25, 2019
Location: Spring Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

It’s another show with a purpose as we have the go home show for Crown Jewel. Therefore Brock Lesnar and Cain Velasquez are here, because that’s the biggest match on the show no one other than WWE wants to watch. I’m not sure what to expect around here but hopefully it picks up a little bit. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We start fast with MizTV with Ric Flair, Hulk Hogan and most of their teams, with no entrance for anyone. You have Hulk Hogan’s theme available and you don’t think that’s a good way to start the show? Miz introduces everyone (including Shorty G, who is now in neon basketball gear with a big G on the front), including members of the teams who aren’t here. Hogan talks about forming a team so Flair rants about how awesome his team is. That sends Flair into a speech about how he’s never lost to Flair and how great his own team is.

Sami laughs at Hogan bragging about Shorty G, who can’t wait to shut Sami up. Ali, who is about the same height as G, makes fun of Sami for not wrestling anymore but Corbin cuts them off to say Crown Jewel was named in his honor. Corbin promises that Reigns will let everyone down as he always does. Reigns: “Corbin, shut up man.” Reigns insults Corbin’s king gear and a six man tag is set up, with Hogan calling Nakamura a young boy. Sami isn’t available though, due to a neck issue so he has a replacement ready: Cesaro, who starts the fight with Reigns right now. Team Hogan clears the ring and we get some Real American.

New Day vs. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode

No Woods here as he had surgery for his torn Achilles today so you won’t be seeing him in the ring for a very long time. Ziggler starts fast by knocking Kofi to the floor and we take a break about a minute in. Back with Big E. cleaning house and bringing Kofi in off the hot tag for a launch onto Ziggler. Everything breaks down and it’s a spinebuster to Big E. Kofi springboards in with a double ax handle to Roode but gets rolled up with tights for the pin at 5:12. New Day was announced as getting a Tag Team Title shot on next week’s show and they lose here to set up the Tag Team Turmoil. This is an example of WWE being REALLY STUPID!

Post match Revival comes out to brawl with New Day but Heavy Machinery makes the save. I’m still trying to get over how completely stupid that match result was. It’s a match designed to set up next week’s big gauntlet so there are literally NINE other teams you could put out there other than the #1 contenders. How exactly did the decision making process go?

Video on Tyson Fury vs. Braun Strowman.

Lacey Evans vs. Camron Connors

Actually hold on as Lacey says she isn’t lowering herself to beat someone like Connors. She’s going to walk out instead of embarrassing her so Lacey says ring the bell so she can be counted out. Lacey dives back in at nine and hits the Woman’s Right for the pin at 47 seconds. Well that happened.

A far too excited Nikki Cross doesn’t like the insults that Bayley has thrown at her lately. Tonight, Nikki has to face Mandy Rose, who is certainly gorgeous, but wrestling isn’t a beauty pageant.

So we’re forty minutes in and we’ve had the following:

  • Hulk Hogan and Ric Flair, who have two of the most iconic entrances of all time, standing in the ring to start the show.

  • Shorty G. in neon basketball gear.

  • The #1 contenders losing in a five minute match when you could throw in multiple other teams (like one of the teams who made the post match save) to make the same point.

  • Lacey Evans teasing walking out before coming back in to win in less than a minute.

I’m starting to get the mindset of the people who can’t stand this show lately. It’s like a bunch of people put in individual stuff but no one talked to each other as the show was being put together.

We look at the Firefly Fun House being burned down.

Drew Gulak vs. Kalisto

Well of course that’s what this show needs. Before the match, Lucha House Party talks about wanting to bring lucha libre to Smackdown. They do know that REY MYSTERIO is already on the show right? The bell rings and Gulak grabs a mic to introduce himself. He has a PowerPoint presentation on how Tyson Fury can defeat Braun Strowman. The slides won’t change so Kalisto kicks him down, only to get caught with a spinebuster. The referee stops to check on him but says it’s ok. Gulak loads up the Cyclone Crash….and here’s Braun Strowman for a distraction. The Salida Del Sol finishes Gulak at 2:15.

Post match it’s a running powerslam to plant Gulak. He does it again at the audience’s request and promises the same to Fury.

Here’s Daniel Bryan for a chat with Michael Cole. Last week he pinned the Intercontinental Champion and the arena erupted in YES chants. Bryan didn’t want to get involved though, so is the YES Movement back? Before that can be answered, here are Shinsuke Nakamura and Sami Zayn to interrupt. Sami shows us a clip of Bryan declaring the YES Movement dead back in November. The fans don’t like the new Daniel Bryan though because Sami wants to talk about the REAL Daniel Bryan.

Sami knows that Bryan is a real and honorable man but the people don’t care. It’s interesting that Bryan has a lot more in common with Sami and Nakamura, who care about the same things he cares about. They are all artists in the ring though, and now Bryan is at a crossroads. He can either go back to the people with the nitwits who chant YES or he can move forward with the two of them. The handshake is offered but Bryan walks away instead. This was the only good thing on the show so far.

Nikki Cross vs. Mandy Rose

Sasha Banks and Bayley (all in black) are on commentary. Mandy knocks her down to start and cuts off a comeback attempt with a forearm to the face. The chinlock doesn’t last long and Rose gets two off a fall away slam. Sonya Deville gets in a hard right hand to Nikki but she’s right back with a high crossbody for two. Another Sonya distraction backfires and it’s the Purge to finish Mandy at 4:37.

Rating: D+. Another match that just happened as this show is spiraling down. Bayley as the emotionless champion could go somewhere but Nikki as a title contender isn’t so likely. They’re trying to make someone new though and I can certainly give them points for that, but this wasn’t the best place to try and have something positive, at least not after the first hour of this show being such a mess.

Clip of the Undertaker on the WWE float in Riyadh.

Here are Rey Mysterio and Cain Velasquez for a chat. Rey is proud of his son Dominick for trying to fight back and now Rey knows he’s really a Mysterio. As for Brock Lesnar, Rey knows Cain is going to give Lesnar another scar. Lesnar and Paul Heyman need to get out here right now so we can do this face to face.

They pop up on screen instead, saying that Lesnar has more important things to do than go face to face with Velasquez. Brock has been doing something but Heyman won’t say where he has been doing it. Rey still wants them out here right now so Heyman says Rey should guess to whom Brock has been doing something. We pan down to the unconscious Dominick and Lesnar laughs.

Post break, Rey and Cain are checking on Dominick in the trainer’s room. Lesnar comes in with a trashcan to clean house, including an F5 to send Mysterio into the wall and another F5 to drop Cain onto Dominick.

Post break Velasquez shouts about Brock in Spanish and seems to swear vengeance.

Cesaro/King Corbin/Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Roman Reigns/Ali/Shorty G.

Hogan and Flair are here too. Team Flair jumps them at the bell and the fight is on outside, with Jimmy Hart having to hold Hogan back. Reigns and Corbin take turns hammering away at each other in the corner and Roman nails the Samoan drop for two. Nakamura comes in and gets hit in the face so it’s off to Gable (Cole said his old name so it’s good enough for me) to work on the arm.

Of course Gable can wrestle Nakamura down without much trouble as Cole brings up Gable’s Olympic career, with Graves pointing out that he looks like he belongs on the Tune Squad. Ignoring the fact that almost no fans under the age of twenty five are going to get that reference, that’s quite the mixed look at Gable. Ali comes in for a running hurricanrana to Cesaro, who muscles him over with a gutwrench suplex. Team Flair takes turns sending Ali to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Ali trying to fight back but having his tornado DDT blocked. Instead Cesaro picks him up by the throat, only to have Ali plant him with a DDT. Nakamura and Corbin break up the hot tag attempt though, only to have Ali enziguri Corbin. That’s enough for the tag to Gable, who suplexes Nakamura and neckbreakers Corbin. The moonsault gets two on Corbin (with Hogan in one of his elements as a cheerleader on the floor) and there’s a suplex to Cesaro.

Nakamura breaks up the ankle lock with a running knee so he and Corbin put Gable on top. That earns them a double missile dropkick and the hot tag brings in Reigns for the house cleaning. Cesaro takes Reigns down though and the Sharpshooter goes on until Ali breaks it up with a superkick. Everything breaks down and it’s the parade of secondary finishers. Reigns Superman punches Cesaro out of the air and hits the spear, setting up Ali’s 450 for the pin at 15:03.

Rating: B-. They took their time to get started here but once it was clicking, everything started to roll. The post break stuff was rather entertaining and Ali getting the pin was a nice touch. I’m not exactly thrilled in the ten man tag as it’s likely to go a long time and not be very interesting, but at least the six man version was pretty good.

Overall Rating: D. Oh I did not like this show. While it did pick WAY up starting with the Bryan segment, the rest of the show was a complete mess with the build to Crown Jewel taking over everything, even if it wrecked whatever else might be going on. In other words, if you’re not on Crown Jewel, your appearance here didn’t matter in the slightest. It’s another example of WWE trying to cram in so much stuff and the shows suffering as a result.

We’re less than a month away from Survivor Series and the show has not been mentioned once on WWE TV. By the time it is, which if we’re lucky will be next Friday (when the Smackdown roster is completely gassed from flying around the world in a day), when we’re about three weeks away. Then three weeks after that it’s TLC, with the Starrcade special in the middle. WWE has gotten a lot worse about this overdoing it lately and it’s really, really getting to be a problem. Just let things breathe for once so your fans aren’t so burned out. Why is that so much to ask?

Results

Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode b. New Day – Rollup with tights to Kingston

Lacey Evans b. Camron Connors – Woman’s Right

Kalisto b. Drew Gulak – Salida Del Sol

Nikki Cross b. Mandy Rose – Purge

Ali/Shorty G./Roman Reigns b. Cesaro/King Corbin/Shinsuke Nakamura – 450 to Cesaro

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – May 23, 2005: The Three Head Monsters

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 23, 2005
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re on the way to the next Raw pay per view now that Smackdown’s show is over, but not before a big time show tonight. This week will see Batista defend the World Title against Edge, who has been lit on fire with a now heel Lita and a win in the Gold Rush Tournament. Other than that, it’s time to start the build to Vengeance, which seems a long way off. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We recap the Gold Rush Tournament finals with Lita turning on Kane to join Edge. I heartily approve of heel Lita, and JR’s line of “the dirty rotten bastard is going to wrestle for the World Title!” is pretty awesome.

Here are Edge and Lita, flanked by a bunch of security guard. Lita tells this room full of saints to go ahead and pass judgment on her. Women use their husbands like she did to Kane all the time, and can you really blame her? Maybe it started with the kidnapping, the forcing her into sex, being pregnant with his baby, the forced marriage and losing her baby? So yeah, she used her husband to get somewhere and all it took was a really gross wet kiss last week.

The fans start a pretty expected chant at her but she says don’t be jealous because she gets more action in a month than the rest of the crowd does in their entire lives. She never loved Kane (well duh) and while he was following her around like a puppy, she fell in love with a real man. Kane couldn’t satisfy her, just like any man she has ever been with. Well save for one, and that is the man she has been seeing behind Kane’s back for months now.

Edge knows everyone is jealous of them for how they look and what they do. He has the girl and tonight he’ll get the gold. Edge won at Wrestlemania, and tonight he claims his destiny by becoming World Heavyweight Champion. Bank on it. Kissing ensues and the fans care a bit. This worked as well as it could with a bad premise. There was no secret to the fact that Lita didn’t want to marry Kane in the first place and never loved him in the first place, so why should I be upset about what happened to him? He was so evil about six months ago and now he deserves sympathy? It doesn’t quite work that way.

Kane is rather….I guess the word is serious in the back.

Eric Bischoff is making funeral arrangements for ECW when Shelton Benjamin comes in. Chris Jericho isn’t here for their tag match so Bischoff turns it into a handicap match instead. They bring up the Draft, with both thinking John Cena would be a good addition. Benjamin thinks Bischoff going to Smackdown would be better. Eh, even if Bischoff goes to Smackdown, I can’t see him lasting that long over there.

Muhammad Hassan/Daivari vs. Shelton Benjamin

Shelton comes up swinging but gets punched down by Hassan. A blind tag brings in Daivari but Shelton sends Hassan outside and armbars Daivari without too much effort. The fans get behind Shelton, only to be cut off as Hassan gets in a trip from the floor. Hassan comes back in for a hard elbow to the face and the chinlock goes on. It’s back to Daivari, who spends too much time shouting and gets suplexed down for his efforts. Shelton faceplants Daivari and nails a running knee lift on Hassan. Daivari tries to bring in a chair and the distraction lets Hassan hit a Downward Spiral for the pin.

Rating: D. Just a quick handicap match here to give Hassan a win over the champ to set up what should be a title match down the line. The match was the usual mess of a short form handicap match and that all but guarantees that it’s going to be terrible. At least they also advanced Jericho’s issues, as a heel turn has seemed to be in the cards for a few weeks now.

Post break Jericho arrives and is told that his match already happened. He’s been busy with the Fozzy tour so he’s got a lot on his mind. Whenever he finds Bischoff, he’ll face anyone tonight because Jericho equals ratings.

Christian and Tomko are in the back when Edge and Lita come in. Edge says Christian is probably staying on Raw so he has an offer: if Christian were to help Edge win the title tonight, Edge might be willing to part with the Money in the Bank briefcase. Christian gets it and says maybe he’ll see Edge later.

Chris Masters vs. Stevie Richards

This is for retribution after Masters broke Richards’ nose. Richards slugs away to start but Masters snaps off a suplex. The ax handle is blocked and Richards explodes with right hands. Masters takes out the knee and it’s the Masterlock for the quick win.

Post match medics come out and check on Richards.

Bischoff sends Todd Grisham to find out how Kane is doing.

Here are some of the women who might be finalists in the Diva Search.

Chris Jericho vs. Sylvain Grenier

Grenier is here on his own. Jericho gets taken into the corner to start and the Walls attempt is broken up. Instead Jericho forearms him in the head and hits the enziguri to the forearm. Grenier gets in a clothesline but Jericho snaps him throat first across the top. The Walls finish in a hurry.

Rating: D+. They were smart to not have Jericho break much of a sweat over Grenier here as Grenier is likely to be on the endangered species list with La Resistance done. The match was short and to the point though and that’s as much as you can expect. Jericho’s teased heel turn is a good idea though as he’s been in limbo for a long time.

Post match here’s Shelton but Jericho drops to the floor and talks about everything he has going on. Sometimes you’re going to have to put up with him being a little late because he’s Chris Jericho. The Jericholics will always be on his side.

Here’s Eric Bischoff for the ECW funeral, complete with a barbed wire wreath. Bischoff gives a rather laugh filled history of ECW, talking about the Bingo hall and how the roster thought they were rebels. Then he crushed ECW and it died, only to have rumors of a reunion pop up again. Therefore, he’ll crush it again, with the help of some Raw volunteers who are going to show up to the Hammerstein Ballroom on June 12. The rant continues but here’s Vince McMahon to interrupt.

Vince is here because he has a vested interest in the future of ECW because he supposed ECW for years (which seems to be news to Bischoff). Vince knew that one day, the ECW stars could become WWE superstars, including Mick Foley, the Dudleys and Steve Austin. Bischoff isn’t pleased but Vince brings up the loans that ECW owed him, totaling nearly $600,000. That’s why he wants the ECW show to be a success, which is why he advertised them himself.

As for tonight, he’s going to present the ECW match that Bischoff canceled last week. See, the only brand that is really dead is WCW and Vince killed it himself. With Bischoff’s legs cut off, here’s Paul Heyman to talk about ECW instead, which gives us the always awesome visual of the three promoters in the same ring at once (I believe for the first time ever). Heyman says Vince may own ECW but Heyman controls it.

That brings him to Bischoff, who gets a rant about everything ECW did, including the cruiserweights and submission style, with Heyman holding up the ECW press pass every time he says everything. We hear about ECW being in your face and hardcore, with Bischoff being invited to see the show in person, with Heyman getting in the date of the show as he always does.

Vince loves the idea of a good old fight so may the best man win. Heyman says Bischoff has started a fire that he can’t put out. The wreath is set on fire and Bischoff looks worried. This just turned into a big deal and that’s a good thing as the show feels special. You could feel the anger that Heyman had for Bischoff here and it must feel great to him to have ECW back instead of WCW.

Steve Austin is in the remake of the Longest Yard.

Chris Benoit vs. Tajiri

ECW Rules so Tajiri jumps him from behind with the kendo stick on the stage. Benoit takes it away but gets the mist to the face so Tajiri can bring in some weapons. Tajiri whips him into a trashcan in the corner but Benoit is right back with the rolling German suplexes. The Crossface with the kendo stick gives Benoit the quick tap. Lawler keeps jumping on ECW and JR defends it, which is completely bizarre to hear.

Ric Flair thanks Batista for the save last week. He even wishes Batista good luck against Kane tonight.

Grisham goes to interview Kane, who talks about all the pain he has gone through over the years. This is the worst ever though and he is so hurt that he starts to cry. Kane doesn’t want this pain and wants it off of him. Instead he wants to give the pain to someone else.

Post break, Kane walks out.

Here’s Maria to interview Viscera, who is rather impressive looking in his suit. Maria invites Lillian into the ring because it’s clear that Viscera likes her. That’s true, though Lillian never showed up last week. He has a surprise for tonight though and asks for lights and music. Maria has to go get him a hot dog (Viscera: “Yeah I got a hot dog for you too baby.”) so Viscera can dance and eat at the same time. Lillian gets into it as the jacket comes off and the tie follows…..but then the pants come down. Cue Coach to demand that this be stopped immediately because Bischoff doesn’t need to deal with a sexual harassment lawsuit. Viscera is ordered to leave so it’s a beatdown for Coach, including the pelvic thrusting on the mat. Lillian gets pulled in for her kiss and she doesn’t seem to be complaining.

Raw World Title: Edge vs. Batista

Edge is challenging and has Lita with him. Batista takes him into the corner to start and powers his way out of a bad comeback attempt. With Edge on the floor, here are Christian and Tomko as we take a break. Back with Edge hammering away and getting in a shot to the ribs to send Batista outside.

They head back inside with Edge staying on the ribs with a bodyscissors. A spinwheel kick gives Edge two and we hit the chinlock, which gets switched into a sleeper. Lawler keeps going on about Lita’s top and JR goes into one of his great rants about how this isn’t about Lita. Batista’s arm drops twice and the comeback is on, only to have Edge nail a dropkick for the stop.

Edge goes up top but gets superplexed right back down and Batista is getting fired up. The referee gets bumped so Christian and Tomko come in for the beatdown. Cue Ric Flair for the save but Edge spears him down. Another spear gives Edge two so Lita slides in the briefcase, only to have Batista catch him with the Batista Bomb to retain.

Rating: C-. Well that happened. We spent three weeks on a tournament and the whole thing is more than likely a way to set up HHH vs. Batista III (Why else would Flair be involved?). Edge loses again, though the briefcase is going to be more than enough to keep him relevant. Not a very good match, but with so much going on, that isn’t exactly surprising.

Post match Batista helps Flair up and hugs him but here’s the returning HHH so Flair can hit Batista low. HHH has the sledgehammer and looks at the title like Edge looked at Lita earlier. The very long beatdown ensues, with Batista being busted open. HHH says they’re doing it again, but this time inside Hell in a Cell. A Pedigree onto the title ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. The big segment in the middle was good but the rest of it was pretty dull as we need to fill in time before Vengeance with One Night Stand. Now that show sounds very good and is likely to be a blast, but it doesn’t do much good when so much of the roster has nothing to do with it so far. Hopefully things pick up soon because this wasn’t much of a show, including an underwhelming main event.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – May 16, 2005: While HHH Is Away…..Things Aren’t Very Good

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 16, 2005
Location: Qwest Center, Omaha, Nebraska
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s time to wrap up the Gold Rush Tournament as Edge faces Kane for the #1 contendership to Batista’s Raw World Title. Normally that would be enough, but we also have Christian vs. Ric Flair in what should be a good one and Chris Jericho/Shelton Benjamin vs. Muhammad Hassan/Khosrow Daivari. They’re certainly bringing it for what was likely sweeps week so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence, now prominently featuring Shawn Michaels superkicking Shelton Benjamin out of the air.

The announcers run down the big card.

Muhammad Hassan/Daivari vs. Chris Jericho/Shelton Benjamin

Thankfully it’s just Daivari, which has a better ring than his full name. This was set up last week when Hassan and Daivari jumped both of them at separate times. It’s a brawl to start with Jericho whipping Shelton into the corner for a double Stinger Splash. We settle down to Jericho chopping Daivari and suplexing him down. Shelton comes in for a clothesline but Hassan grabs a backbreaker. It’s already back to Daivari for a double arm crank and then a chinlock to keep things slow.

Back up and Shelton’s clothesline isn’t enough for the tag thanks to Hassan’s diving save and it’s back to cranking on the arms. A Samoan drop gets Shelton out of trouble and Jericho comes in to clean house. The enziguri sets up a high crossbody for two on Hassan with Daivari making the save. That’s enough of a distraction for Hassan to hit his Downward Spiral for the pin.

Rating: C-. Hassan has certainly gotten a lot more watchable in recent weeks and a good portion of that is due to cutting down his mic time. It isn’t like the promos he’s giving have a lot of depth or variety to them so it’s a case of less being more. Daivari has been a big help as well as he can do a lot of the work in the matches, making this a good example of the pair being better than the solo act.

Post match Jericho storms off and Shelton is confused.

Chris Benoit and Tajiri are in the back. They’ve both been invited to ECW One Night Stand so tonight they’ll have an ECW Rules match for old times’ sake. William Regal comes up to find out what is going on so Tajiri explains in Japanese. Regal gets the whole thing but doesn’t care for the violence. Tajiri can go do it if that’s what he wants though.

We look back at the frustrated HHH leaving last week.

Coach literally runs into Eric Bischoff’s office with Ric Flair to tell him about the ECW Rules match. Bischoff doesn’t want to hear about it because Flair has to talk about how great HHH is. Flair demands Bischoff call HHH but that isn’t happening. If HHH wants to come back, HHH can make the call. Flair leaves and runs into Batista, who he blames for everything. How dare Batista cause HHH this many problems when HHH brought him into the business? Batista says it isn’t his fault and Flair got him started. They trade WOOs, with Batista’s being comically quiet.

Ric Flair vs. Christian

Feeling out process to start with Christian hitting a shoulder and offering his own strut. That just gets him a slap to the face so Christian grabs a backdrop. The slam off the top and a clothesline to the floor let Tomko get in a cheap shot. JR refers to this as physical molestation as Flair is thrown back in for two. A missed charge lets Flair chop away and it’s a Flair Flop from Christian. Tomko gets in a shot to break up the Figure Four so Flair grabs a rollup, the tights and the rope for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was a Flair showcase as he got to do all the greatest hits and show that they still work. The problem is that he pinned Christian, who was seemingly ready to break through to the other side and has lost twice in a row since. I’m not sure why WWE bothered setting him up like that to bring him back down, but WWE has done more questionable things before.

Post match Flair is cornered by Christian and Tomko so Batista comes out for the save.

Lita fires Christy up for her lingerie pillow fight until Edge interrupts. He tells Lita to warn Kane about what’s coming tonight, and you can bank on it.

Christian limps around backstage so here’s Maria to ask if he’s hurt. Christian: “Where did you get your journalism degree from? A box of Cocoa Puffs?” This isn’t over with Batista.

Here’s Chris Masters for the Masterlock Challenge. This time the prize is $6,000 and a one way plane ticket to anywhere in the United States, because anywhere is better than Omaha. The fan loses in near record time so here’s Steven Richards to go after Masters and chase him off with a chair. So yes, after a month plus of these things, their best idea is a Steven Richards feud.

Kane grabs Edge by the throat and says stay away from Lita.

Chris Benoit vs. Tajiri

ECW Rules and weapons are provided at ringside. Tajiri starts fast with the Tarantula as Lawler goes off with the insults on ECW as only he can. The handsprings elbow is countered into a German suplex but Tajiri flips out and kicks him in the head. They go outside with Tajiri going face first into the steps and that means it’s ladder time. Tajiri is laid on the table and Benoit climbs the ladder in the ring….but here’s Coach to stop the match on Bischoff’s orders. Bischoff comes out as well to officially end the match. Not long enough to rate but it was there to advance an angle more than anything else.

Post match Bischoff trashes ECW and bans any mention of ECW on Raw whatsoever. You can’t even chant for it! Also, the Raw wrestlers are forbidden from appearing at ECW One Night Stand. Bischoff is even going to show up with a bunch of Raw volunteers to end ECW once and for all. This is an expected reaction from Bischoff and should set up something fun at One Night Stand.

Christy Hemme vs. Candice Michelle

Lingerie pillow fight so the bed is in the ring. They fight and feathers go everywhere, including a trip to the floor just because. Christy wins with a sunset flip.

With the women still in the ring, cue Viscera in a suit because the pillow fight has turned him on. The hip swiveling sends Christy and Candice running, but Viscera would rather talk about Lilian Garcia. Viscera sees the two of them and that bed and he has an idea. He kisses a fan at ringside to get her cotton candy, with JR not liking the idea of Viscera having more sugar.

Lilian gets in the ring and Viscera tells her to put some of the pillows on the bed. He lays down and offers her some cotton candy, which he licks rather, uh, suggestively. Viscera has a surprise for her, including a pickle in his pocket. He pulls out a hotel room key and Lilian isn’t sure about this. Viscera: “Room four sixty nine.” That’s enough to make Lilian to fall off the bed and end a rather horribly entertaining segment. Yeah it’s bad but it’s the overly cheesy bad where they know what they’re doing.

Kane and Lita breathe at each other a lot and kissing ensues.

We recap the Gold Rush Tournament.

Shelton comes up to Jericho to make sure everything is cool. Jericho lists off some of his accomplishments and everything he has going on at the moment, including a plug for a Fozzy album.

Tag Team Titles: Hurricane/Rosey vs. Simon Dean/Maven

Hurricane and Rosey are defending and debut Super Stacy as their new manager. Rosey slams Maven with no problem to start as Lawler tries to figure out what Stacy’s name should be. Hurricane comes in and gets pulled into the wrong corner with Dean taking him down by the neck. A double suplex lets Maven get in some situps but Hurricane fights up and brings in Rosey to clean house. Stacy offers the distraction and it’s a side slam/Eye of the Hurricane combination to finish Maven.

Rating: D-. The champs won the titles ice cold and now they have Stacy Keibler as a manager. Stacy is one of those people whose value was pretty limited in the first place and it has gone through the floor over the last few years. Putting her on this team seems like an act of desperation and it really doesn’t bode well for the champs’ future.

Smackdown Rebound.

Here’s the still injured Randy Orton for a chat. People have been asking him if he is coming back to Raw or going to Smackdown. After telling the fans to shut up, he says he can’t be drafted because he’s injured. That’s because of Batista and the Undertaker, so Orton wants Batista to keep the title until he gets back to take it from him. Orton goes to leave so here’s Vince McMahon to cut him off.

Vince: “What the h*** has happened to you?” He mocks Orton for losing weight but Orton blames the shoulder surgery. Vince doesn’t want to hear about the injury because no one is exempt from the Draft. The Draft begins three weeks from tonight and it’s going on for a whole month this time around. Orton might be standing in a Raw ring for the last time so gain some weight and let your hair grow out again.

Gold Rush Tournament Finals: Kane vs. Edge

Lita is out with Kane. An early big boot drops Edge with JR saying it’s going to be a quick one so don’t make a sandwich. Kane grabs a suplex and chokes away but Edge hammers away in the corner. They fight to the floor with Kane taking over again as they’re firmly in first and a half gear.

Edge takes over with some forearms to the back and the referee gets bumped for a second, allowing Edge to hit a low blow. Back from a break with Edge working on the knee and taking it outside again to stay on said knee. The leglock goes on as this is hardly exciting stuff. Kane fights up and uppercuts him out of the air for two, setting up Snake Eyes for a bonus. The Edge-O-Matic cuts Kane down again but the spear is countered with a grab of the throat.

Edge grabs the referee to escape and the Edgecution gets two more. Kane tries a Tombstone but the ref gets bumped for real this time. The spear barely keeps Kane down and he kicks the briefcase out of Edge’s hands. Lita takes it away but slides it to Edge as Kane goes up, allowing Edge to knock Kane out of the air with a shot to the face. Lita wakes the referee up and Edge gets the pin and the title shot.

Rating: D. This wasn’t very good for the first place but the ending was good with the result, and the way they got there, being what they needed to be. Edge is the bigger star and putting him with Lita should be a great match. Kane is now more of a sympathetic face, or at least as sympathetic as you can be given how he and Lita got together in the first place.

Post match Lita jumps into Edge’s arms and goes evil, which always worked very, very well. Given what was going on in real life, they would have been crazy not to go this way. The big kiss on the stage ends the show as Edge and Lita channel their inner Christian and Trish from last year.

Overall Rating: D. There were some nice storyline additions on here but the wrestling was REALLY bad with the best match being a short and not very good tag match to open the show. I was thinking that this one would be the big show that made up for some of the previous weeks but we’re still waiting, which is becoming quite the problem.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – May 9, 2005: No Payoff

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 9, 2005
Location: Wachovia Arena, Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Tournament time continues this week as we move on to the semifinals in the Gold Rush Tournament. That should mean some good matches as the four left are more than good enough, though the whole point of this is to be Batista’s next victim. I have no idea how we’ll wind up with another HHH title shot, but you can all but bet on that being the endgame. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the tournament starting last week, including the four first round matches.

Here’s HHH for the opening chat, because we need to hear from someone out of the tournament. Before he says anything this time though, HHH goes outside to yell at fans for reminding him that he tapped out. He eventually gets back inside to call the tournament bogus because he Pedigreed Batista and had him beat. The rematch should go to him but Eric Bischoff wants to control Batista and the World Title. If HHH gets one more shot, he’ll beat Batista just like that.

Cue Batista to mockingly apologize for the interruption, because he’s so afraid of HHH. Actually, what exactly is he afraid of? He’s already beaten HHH both times he’s faced him and then there was last week’s loss in the tournament. Maybe….HHH just isn’t good enough for another title shot. There goes HHH’s tie and he eventually says Batista’s title means nothing until he goes through HHH.

That doesn’t mean some Wrestlemania fluke but rather going through HHH. He is what matters in this business and he defines what Batista is and what he will become. If Batista is going to disrespect him, he’ll walk out right now and watch Batista fail from his big mansion. HHH walks out so Batista says he doesn’t need HHH because he’s already beaten him.

Post break, HHH storms out as Ric Flair tells him to stay. HHH tells Flair to come with him but Flair is going to stay and deal with this.

Here are Muhammad Hassan and Daivari with the latter still employed after being beaten down last week. Daivari sucks up to Hassan and issues the open challenge to make up for things.

Khosrow Daivari vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho chops away in the corner but misses a charge and goes shoulder first into the post. The logical armbar goes on for a bit but Daivari goes to the middle rope and gets punched out of the air. A flapjack into the enziguri looks to set up the Walls but Daivari makes the rope. Not that it matters as Jericho gets them on a few seconds later and Daivari taps in a hurry.

Post match Hassan lays out Jericho with the Downward Spiral and the camel clutch. Shelton Benjamin makes the save.

Christy Hemme asks Bischoff about the Draft and is told that the Divas are eligible to be drafted as well. See there’s a new Diva Search coming up and Bischoff hopes to find a more successful Diva. With that insult out of the way, La Resistance comes in to demand another title shot. This leads to an argument between Conway and Grenier so Bischoff puts them in a singles match each. That’s not a good selling point.

Flair leaves HHH a message about how awesome he is but here are Christian and Tyson Tomko to mock Flair for being so worried. It’s a shame that HHH isn’t going to be here tonight because no one can spit water on themselves. Flair: “I don’t like you.” A match is set up for later between Flair and Captain Courageous.

Classic Moment: Jerry Lawler wins the AWA World Title. If nothing else, it’s smart to remind fans that Lawler was a big time wrestler back in the day. How many younger fans wouldn’t know that?

Sylvain Grenier vs. Viscera

Twenty minute HHH segments, a squash and now this. Grenier’s face when he sees Viscera is a nice touch though. Conway leaves and Grenier tries a shoulder, which goes as well as you would have expected. The swinging Boss Man Slam lets Viscera mount him for the pelvic thrusts. A missed splash lets Grenier hit a missile dropkick for two but the spinwheel kick drops him again. The chokebomb ends Grenier in a hurry.

Post match Viscera takes a fan’s nachos and goes to hit on Lilian, saying they taste as good as she does. He has her announce him as the winner again, because that really turns him on. Viscera: “You want some of my nachos?” We get the Lady and the Tramp sharing of the nacho, with Viscera promising that she’ll love the main course. JR: “Why do I want to hear some Barry White all of a sudden?”

A rather pleased Lita comes in to see Kane, who is thinking about them. He hugs her rather forcefully (she doesn’t seem pleased, after weeks of being into him) and reminisces about the nine months they have been married. She likes the idea of him becoming World Champion with hints at fornication if he wins. Kane: “That’s what makes us such a cute couple.”

Gold Rush Tournament Semifinals: Kane vs. Chris Benoit

Lita is here with Kane. Benoit goes with the chops to start before going for the ankle. The Sharpshooter and Crossface attempts are blocked so we’ll try the chops again. Kane’s side slam gets two and we hit the neck crank. A clothesline takes Benoit down again for two and the chinlock goes on.

The big boot connects (and has Lita pleased) but the top rope clothesline is dropkicked out of the air. That sets up the rolling German suplexes and the Swan Dive for two and Lita is panicking. An enziguri into a baseball slide to the floor knocks Lita down and the knee is clutched. Benoit checks on Lita and gets decked from behind, setting up the chokeslam for the pin back inside.

Rating: C+. These two work well together but you can tell a lot of Benoit’s time has passed. Kane is fine for the monster who you push at various times and that’s what they’re doing here, though you can tell something is up with Lita. That could be interesting and I’ll take that above the same run of the mill stuff that often happens on this show.

Christian vs. Ric Flair

Actually hang on as Christian views Flair as a problem, and you know what that means.

Tyson Tomko vs. Ric Flair

Tomko clotheslines him down and gets an early two off a powerslam. Flair gets smart by going after the knee and the Figure Four is on in no time. Christian sneaks in to rake the eyes though and that’s an ejection, allowing Flair to hit Tomko low. The rollup (with trunks of course) is enough for the pin. There’s something so sweet about seeing Flair cheat to win.

Here are some of the people who might make the finals of the Diva Search.

We look back at HHH leaving.

Here’s Stacy Keibler for a completely necessary chat. She’s in Stuff Magazine and we get some clips from her shoot with Todd Grisham doing his best Lawler impression. She offers us a sneak peak in person but here are Simon Dean and Maven to interrupt. They seem to think that Maven is the better looking human and Maven critiques her physique while Simon puts together a shake. Stacy is ordered to drink the shake but she “accidentally” drops it. Cue Hurricane and Rosey for the save as this is really the best they can do for the Tag Team Titles.

Coach comes in to see Bischoff and talks about the upcoming ECW One Night Stand. Bischoff hates the idea because it’s all blood and thumbtacks and barbed wire and violence (the fans seem to approve). As the ECW chants start up, Bischoff promises to squash ECW again.

Rob Conway vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. Conway jumps him during the entrance and says the title should be his. The stomping is on for an early one and a snap suplex is good for the same, meaning it’s already time for the chinlock. Shelton fights up without much trouble and backdrops him for two of his own. The exploder is blocked and Conway scores with a running knee lift. That’s fine with Shelton, who kicks him in the head and hits the springboard bulldog for the fast pin. I’d think that’s about it for La Resistance as an important team now, yes?

Post match Muhammad and Daivari lay out Shelton on the stage. That’s a logical next feud for Hassan and it’s not like Benjamin has anyone else to fight right now.

Here’s John Cena’s Bad Bad Man video.

Maria asks Shawn Michaels about his match with The Edge. After making fun of the mistake, Shawn praises Shelton Benjamin for last week and says if “The Edge” likes to whine, tonight he’ll be throwing the biggest hissy fit ever because Shawn is Money in the Bank.

Next week: Jericho/Benjamin vs. Hassan/Daivari, Christian vs. Flair and the tournament final. That’s a pretty good show.

Gold Rush Tournament Semifinals: Edge vs. Shawn Michaels

Joined in progress with Shawn sending Edge outside for the springboard spinning crossbody. Edge snaps him throat first across the rope to take over and it’s Shawn in trouble in a hurry. Back in and we hit the chinlock, followed by a neckbreaker and the chinlock again. Edge lets that go and heads up, only to get kicked out of the air. A knee lift gives us a double knockdown but it’s Shawn up first and hammering Edge down.

The top rope elbow connects (long one too) but Sweet Chin Music is countered into an electric chair which is countered into a victory roll to give Shawn two. Edge is right back with the Edge-O-Matic but the ref gets bumped, meaning there is no count off the Edgecution. Sweet Chin Music gets the same non-count so Edge gets up and clocks Shawn with the briefcase (putting a dent in the thing) for the pin.

Rating: C. This was a weird one as it felt like they skipped the entire intro and went straight to the big stuff at the end. Edge winning made the most sense as he has a more interesting story and giving him a pin over Shawn, even this kind of pin, sets up better possibilities. Besides, it’s not like Shawn losing is going to hurt him whatsoever.

Overall Rating: D+. The tournament matches were good and next week is looking great, but at the same time there were a lot of short matches here which didn’t mean anything and didn’t exactly go anywhere. That’s acceptable if next week’s show is worth the setup, but I’m not sure how much confidence I have in them to pull something like that off.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Main Event – October 3, 2019: They’re Doing Things Differently

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: October 3, 2019
Location: Talking Stick Resort Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Dio Maddin, Mickie James

This could be a different kind of show as there is no Smackdown material here as the show had not taken place yet. That will be taken care of when next week’s show airs, but thankfully this week’s Raw was a big enough deal that everything should be fine. Well I mean Raw wasn’t all that great but maybe the highlights will be better. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Mojo Rawley vs. No Way Jose

Jose dances a lot to start as Mickie talks about how much she wants in on the Conga Line. Rawley gets shoved into the corner and glares at him, allowing Jose to hit a running corner dropkick. That’s enough to put Rawley on the floor but he’s right back in with a jawbreaker. Some right hands keep Jose in trouble and it’s time to choke on the rope. The required chinlock goes on but Rawley lets go so he can pose. Jose hits a dropkick and a running clothesline in the corner, setting up a high crossbody for two. A missed charge in the corner sets up the running right hand to give Rawley the pin at 5:30.

Rating: C-. I know I say something like this every single time but these two almost always have a decent match against each other. For the life of me I’d love to see Jose get a chance to do something fresh as he is more than talented enough to make something bigger work. That won’t happen as Jose is slotted into his spot, but it’s a spot that isn’t likely going anywhere anytime soon, which isn’t the worst thing in the world.

From Raw.

It’s time for MizTV with Miz offering condolences to Rey and his family. He can’t imagine what it would be like to have something like that happen to his child. As for tonight, he has two legends for his guests. That would be Hulk Hogan (with Jimmy Hart) and Ric Flair, with Ric not seemingly happy with Hogan. Ric complains about hearing Real American for thirty years. Hogan: “WOO!” Miz: “We’ve been hearing those even longer!”

Hogan brings out his captain in the form of Seth Rollins, but Flair has his own captain in Randy Orton. Randy wants Seth’s undivided attention so can he please crawl out of Hogan’s a** for a second. Randy to Flair: “Can I get a WOO?” They’ll be picking their teams together over the next few weeks but for now, let’s have a captain’s match. Flair was all over the place here and seemed a bit out of it, or at least rambling with some off the cuff comments.

Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton

I think this is non-title….and here’s King Corbin to interrupt. The bell never rings as Corbin and Orton double team Seth, including a scepter shot. Rusev of all people saves and I smell a tag match. Actually we don’t as Rusev clears the ring and we seem to have a second member for each team.

From Raw.

Sasha Banks vs. Alexa Bliss

Hang on though as here’s Becky Lynch to join commentary. Bliss gets knocked to the floor to start and it’s already time for the trash talk from the ring. Becky gets on the table and yells back as we go split screen for a Gears of War ad. Back in a hurry with Becky still standing and taping her fists. An ambulance siren goes off in the arena, which I would assume would be Dominick’s ambulance leaving. Bliss slaps away but a DDT is broken up, leaving Banks to beg off. She calls for Bayley (not here) and the distraction lets her kick Bliss in the leg and grab a rollup for the pin at 4:25.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here other than a nice hope of having the stories bleed between segments for a change. The ambulance leaving gives me some hope, as there is no logical reason to have everything come to a halt because another match starts up. The ending was a little odd as it seemed to focus more on the Tag Team Title stuff than the Raw Women’s Title on Sunday.

Post match Becky comes in for the fight but Banks bails into the crowd, where a fan has the most bugged out eyes.

Quick look at Brock Lesnar destroying Rey Mysterio and Dominick.

Lucha House Party vs. EC3/Eric Young

Are they just running the same matches that they saw on previous shows? Kalisto is the odd man out for the House Party here. Dorado armdrags Young into a standing moonsault for two to start. Metalik, in his full bodysuit, comes in and climbs onto Dorado’s shoulders for the splash. Double dropkicks put Young and EC3 on the floor as we take a break.

Back with EC3 stomping Dorado down in the corner and handing it back to Young for a chinlock. The moonsault misses though and an enziguri to EC3 is enough for the hot tag to Metalik. Everything breaks down and Young’s top rope elbow hits EC3 by mistake. Metalik’s elbow into the shooting star from Dorado is enough for the pin at 8:52.

Rating: C. Another match where they were working hard and trying, which is starting to become more of a thing around here. Don’t worry though as I’m sure WWE will manage to crush their spirits soon enough and let them know that this is Main Event and that’s not what they’re supposed to do around here. I’d be curious to know how low on the card whoever runs this show is, as it must be the busy work for some agent backstage more than anything else.

From Raw one more time.

Raw World Title: Rusev vs. Seth Rollins

Rusev is challenging and gets a jobber entrance as Orton and Corbin are watching from the stage. Rollins tries to start fast but has to bail from the Accolade. The fall away slam starts working on the back as we take a break (with the Fiend appearing to say Let Me In). Back with Rollins fighting out of the bearhug and sending Rusev to the floor for the suicide dives. Rusev rolls through a high crossbody but Rollins rolls through his roll through for two.

Rusev kicks him in the head and gets two off a swinging release Rock Bottom. Rollins is back up with the Falcon Arrow for two but the Stomp misses. The springboard knee hits part of a superkick…..and here’s Bobby Lashley. He waves someone out though and here is…..Lana, as Rusev is crushed. Kissing ensues with Lana almost crawling on top of Lashley as Rusev just glares. There go the lights and the Fiend Mandible Claws Rollins in a no contest at 11:30.

Rating: D+. This was just a backdrop for the double angles and I’d rather they do that here than wasting what could have been a big match with Mysterio. Rusev not losing is a great sign and he has a feud set up instantly. I’m curious about the story behind the whole thing so at least they have something going on already.

Laughter ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. The weird schedule changed some stuff around here but for what it was, this wasn’t too bad. They got in the bigger stuff from Raw, but it’s a strange situation because Raw was possibly the fourth biggest show of the week. That may sound strange, but it could very well become the new norm around here, which is going to take a lot of getting used to. Better than average show here, but that’s on the Main Event scale.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6