Zicky Dice’s Trouble In Paradise 2: It’s Either Fun Or Not Fun
Zicky Dice’s Trouble In Paradise 2
Date: April 1, 2022
Location: Fairmont Hotel, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Jonny Loquasto, Zick Dicey, Matthew Rehwoldt
This is another of the Wrestlemania Weekend shows and in this case, it is another WrestleCon show. I didn’t actually take this one in as I went to Axxess instead and I’m not sure what this is going include. That can make for some very fun shows as well and hopefully that is the case again. Let’s get to it.
The opening video features Zicky Dice standing on a train track as the Outlandish Paradise Express train comes straight for him. Dice whips out some, uh, dice, and throws them at the train, which explodes.
We meet the commentary team, which includes Zick Dicey, a puppet, who isn’t mic’d well. They aren’t thrilled with waiting so long on ring announcer Chris Van Vliet taking his sweet time getting to the ring.
Van Vliet finally comes to the ring (about eight minutes into the broadcast) to fire up the crowd, including those watching on Twitch (where the original broadcast took place). The opening video plays on the screen and here is Zicky Dice himself. Dice if fired up to be here, partially because it’s a tax write off. He doesn’t have a match tonight so send him Lex Luger or Bret Hart. The open challenge to anyone upstairs at WrestleCon is on to anyone with a broken hip or any old guy.
Cue Matt Cardona, who is mad over Dice crashing the Major Figures Pod last night. Cardona asks who the f*** is paying him to be here, asking if it’s Dice, Twitch, Mike from WrestleCon or whoever else. Dice may be the King of the Internet but he’s the Internet Champion and should be out there. That’s cool with Dice, who references Chelsea Green and a banana before issuing the challenge for an Impact Wrestling Digital Media Title shot. Let’s do a Twitch sub goal and make it falls count anywhere. Game on.
Impact Wrestling Digital Media Title: Matt Cardona vs. Zicky Dice
Dice is challenging and it’s falls count anywhere. Cardona tries Radio Silence to start but gets powerbombed down for an early two. They go to the floor and trade slams until Cardona is whipped hard into the steps. Back in and Cardona spits some water in his face so Dice puts his hands into his own trunks, only to have Cardona shove them into his mouth.
Cardona goes to hammer away in the corner but gets bit in the leg and tossed to the floor. They fight into the crowd with Dice hitting a suplex on the concrete for two. Things move into the lobby (where Chelsea Green can be seen going up the escalator), where Cardona hits a Reboot against the steps to retain at 5:38.
Rating: C. This was a bit of a disappointment as they didn’t do much with the stipulation, but I can understand the idea of not being able to brawl around a rather fancy hotel. At the same time, they were trying to get Dice on the show and Cardona is a pretty big name compared to the rest of the card. Not exactly a great match, but it felt big enough for something like this.
Post match Cardona hits him with a sign, sending Dice riding up the escalator.
The puppet’s mic has been fixed.
Deonn Rusman vs. Jonah Turk
Turk is a rather large man (weighing in at “a metric ton of love”) and apparently someone Dice does not like on his Twitch stream. Rusman shoves Turk into the corner to start and a single shoulder puts Turk down again. Turk manages to run him over for a breather though and goes to the middle rope. That means a powerbomb out of the corner, setting up a spear to give Rusman the pin at 2:49. Turk getting in the ring seemed to be a joke for Dice’s Twitch stream so you can’t get too mad at a nothing match here.
Post match Rusman spears him again for fun.
Jah-C vs. Levi Shapiro vs. Keita Murray vs. Lord Crewe vs. Carlie Bravo vs. Darian Bengston
One fall to a finish because we need a (Sensational Sextuplet) Scramble match. Bengston (“the Shakespeare geek”) gets jumped from behind to start and tossed to the floor, which at least clears the ring for a bit. Keita stands in the corner and warms up while the other four brawl inside. That means a big double middle finger from Keita, earning him a four way boot to the face. We settle down to Shapiro powerslamming Jah-C but Bravo is up to clean house.
Crewe and Bravo slug it out with Crewe dropping him, only to get jumped by Bengston. We settle down to Crewe vs. Shapiro before they start to powerbombing Jah-C and Bravo. The other four get back in for stereo double belly to back suplexes and everyone is down. Jah-C DDTs Keita into the corner but Shapiro pulls him outside. That earns Shapiro a crotching on the top and it’s time for the string of flip dives. Shapiro cuts off the referee’s dive (Loquasto: “I don’t know what is going on here.”) but the second attempt connects to wipe out the pile on the floor.
Back in and Bengston hits a tiger driver 98 on Bravo but the referee gets pulled out. There’s the required Tower of Doom, allowing Bravo to come off the top with a splash for two. Crewe gets to clean house for a bit before we hit a short form version of the parade of secondary (I think?) finishers. Jah-C Finally hits a superkick to finish Bengston at 11:18.
Rating: C+. I have never been a fan of this kind of match as there are a bunch of people flying around and trying their best to get some spotlight while also having to sell for everyone else. That doesn’t make for the best match and that was the case again here. There were some cool spots, as always, but no one got to stand out in the slightest. That can get a bit old and it isn’t like anyone gets much out of something like this other than an appearance.
Everyone but Bengston leaves so here are the New Japan LA Dojo to beat Bengston down. Bengston is out of the Factory and the two schools aren’t getting along. Fair enough.
Lince Dorado vs. Black Taurus
Dorado’s new gimmick seems to be that he is a marijuana enthusiast, though he does stop to say hello to superfan Vladimir (of the unreleased documentary fame). Neither of them can get a hurricanrana to start so Dorado offers Taurus a puff. With that not working, Dorado dropkicks him to the floor but the running flip dive is pulled out of the air. A powerbomb sends Dorado into the barricade, with commentary saying “when you mess with the bull, sometimes you get the horns and sometimes you get powerbombed into the barricade”.
Taurus sends him into the barricade a few times and then hits Dorado square in the mask. Back in and Dorado can’t get a cross armbreaker so he settles for a German suplex and a springboard moonsault press for two each. Taurus is right back with a pop up Samoan drop for two of his own but Dorado grabs the Golden Rewind. A crucifix bomb drops Taurus and Dorado hits a pair of moonsaults to send him outside.
That’s fine with Dorado, who hits a big dive to the floor. Back in and a poisonrana plants Taurus for two more but Taurus hits a powerbomb backbreaker to cut Dorado off fast. They go to the same corner, where Dorado snaps off a super hurricanrana and lands on his feet, because of course he can do that. A shooting star press gives Dorado the pin at 12:04.
Rating: B-. I liked this one more than I was expecting to as the power vs. speed formula works again. The Lucha Lit gimmick for Dorado might not have the longest shelf life but it certainly gets your attention, at least in the short term. Taurus continues to feel like a huge monster and while it is a big weird to see him lose here, he should be fine going forward just by letting him beat people up.
Post match they share some of Dorado’s….stuff.
Mike Bailey vs. Effy
Submission match. Bailey sneaks up behind him to start and hits the big flip dive to the floor. They go into the stands where Effy chokes but gets pulled into a cross armbreaker. An STF, using a chair (that’s a new one), has Effy in trouble for a bit before they head inside for some chops to stagger Effy some more. Back up and Effy ducks a kick to the face and tries a rollup as he forgets the rules.
Instead Effy tries a leg choke in the corner before trying a kneebar…but he doesn’t know what he’s doing so Bailey laughs at him. They slap each other with Bailey getting the better of things so Effy goes with an atomic drop. A backdrop sets up something like a dragon sleeper but Bailey slips out and spins him into a rather nasty Deathlock. With that not working, Effy is sent outside for the big dive as per Bailey’s custom.
Speaking of customs, Bailey misses his moonsault knees onto the apron, allowing Effy to wrap the knee around the post. Back in and Effy bites Bailey’s chest but gets taken down for the moonsault knees. The Ultimate Weapon connects for Bailey so he grabs a rear naked choke, which is reversed into….Effy biting the toe (after removing the boot and licking the sole) and Bailey taps at 13:07.
Rating: D+. I don’t know if I don’t get Effy or if I was missing the joke here but this really didn’t work. It was built around the comedy, but the comedy wasn’t working here. I’ve heard good things about Effy and I’ve seen him do some fun stuff before, though I couldn’t get into this one. Then again it might be due to getting sick of Bailey after so many matches from him this weekend.
Commentary recaps the night so far.
Masha Slamovich vs. The Bear
This was billed as an actual bear but we get….Parrow, who brings out a guy in a bear costume. The Bear is billed as being from Jellystone Park, though the fact that his graphic says Scotty 2 Hotty would suggest otherwise. Granted a previous graphic read “The Bear (Max The Impaler)” kind of killed the mood. The Bear beats up the handlers so Masha throws marshmallows at him, only to have the Bear grab a bearhug (you knew that was coming).
Masha gets thrown around even more but the referee gets a marshmallow in his face. A German suplex gives Masha a breather but she gets thrown down for trying a choke. Therefore, she tries to use the referee to appear bigger, as you do to deal with a bear. More of the Bear costume comes off before Masha chokes again and the Bear is out at 6:38.
Rating: D+. It wasn’t as long as the previous match but this one felt like they had a single joke but didn’t realize that they had to do something with it. The Bear looked good to start but then it was the same stuff over and over until Masha won with the fifth or so choke. This needed more jokes in the ring rather than on commentary and I wasn’t getting into it very well.
Rich Swann vs. Scotty 2 Hotty
Well it’s certainly a unique main event. Swann dances through the crowd on the way to the ring, as he tends to do. After the Big Match Intros, Scotty takes his hat off and throws it to Swann, who puts it on and then throws it over to the referee so we can get going. They take their time touching fingers to start and finally lock up. We hear about their histories and resumes before Rehwoldt talks about Scotty giving him the Worm before he debuted in NXT.
Swann kicks him into the corner to turn things a bit more serious but Scotty hands in the ropes (ala Andrade) to avoid a trip to the floor. A suplex drops Swann and that means the Moonwalk. The armbar keeps Swann in trouble for a bit but he sends Scotty outside for a change. Scotty is sat in a chair so Swann can run around the ring for a kick to the face.
It works so well that he does it again before cranking on both arms back inside. Scotty fights up for the dancing right hand but Swann is right back with the running flip ax kick. That doesn’t do Swann much good though as Scotty hits the bulldog that sets up the Worm. That sets up the Worm to give Scotty a pretty big upset at 9:20.
Rating: C. This is the definition of a fun main event and that’s all it needed to be. Scotty looked good in the ring and certainly didn’t appear to have anything resembling ring rust, which is more than I would have expected. Not a great match or anything, but I can see why this was something people, including me, would want to see.
Respect is shown post match. Swann goes to leave but hang on, because it is time to dance. Rehwoldt: “The options are yes or h*** yes. Take your pick.” The referee gets to play Rikishi for the big moment.
We cut to Zicky Dice in the back where he wants the stream started over as he rapidly thanks the sponsors to wrap it up.
A highlight reel finally ends the show.
Overall Rating: C. This is a show where it was never going to be a classic but it wasn’t supposed to be. Instead, we got about two and a half hours of fun stuff with some pretty decent wrestling included. It isn’t a show I’ll ever need to see again, but if you wanted a nice start to the most packed day of the WrestleCon schedule, this was a good way to go. Not a great or even a very good show, but they figured out how to have some fun without many resources available and that is a nice trick to pull off.
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