NWA Omni House Show – February 26, 1984: Give It Some Time

NWA House Show
Date: February 26, 1984
Location: The Omni, Atlanta, Georgia

This is exactly what it sounds like, as we’re going to one of the biggest arenas in the south and probably the most important in all of the NWA. This is a pretty awesome era for wrestling and there is some incredible talent on the show, which means we should be in for a treat. I’ve been looking forward to this so let’s get to it.

Pez Whatley vs. Jesse Barr

Whatley is rather popular and Barr is better known (kind of) as Jimmy Jack Funk. After some extensive referee instructions, we’re ready to go, with an exchange of standing switches. A wrestling exchange on the mat goes nowhere and it’s a standoff. Whatley grabs a quick small package for two and we get a nice shake of the finger. Barr takes him down and puts a knee in the back for the chinlock to slow the pace.

Whatley fights up a few times before a pull of the hair drags him back into a regular chinlock. Another comeback is cut off with a snapmare into another chinlock as they’re not exactly burning the mat up here. Back up and Whatley hits a crossbody and small package for two each, followed by a quick belly to back suplex. Barr sends him crashing to the floor though, setting up a running knee (loud one at that) for one on the way back in. Another running knee is blocked though and Whatley hits a running headbutt for the pin at 6:43.

Rating: C-. Not exactly a hot start here as this wasn’t even a long match and a good chunk of it was spent on the chinlocks. The fans did come up for Whatley’s comebacks but there wasn’t much to see here. That being said, this was the kind of match that existed for the sake of having wrestling going on while people were filing in and it served that purpose.

The Spoiler vs. Johnny Rich

Spoiler is a rather large masked man while Rich is a traditional good guys. Rich gets backed into the corner to start and Spoiler slugs away. Some right hands and a bad dropkick get Rich out of trouble so Spoiler powers him into the corner without much trouble. More right hands rock Spoiler and Rich gets two off a slam, with Spoiler already having to use the ropes. From offense that bad looking? Spoiler goes up and walks the ropes (yes, that is where Undertaker got it from) for a shot to the head before knocking Rich out to the floor.

Back in and Spoiler walks the rope for another elbow and Rich is outside again. Rich gets back in and slugs away before slamming Spoiler off the top to break up the third rope walk. Spoiler shrugs it off and grabs the claw before knocking Rich outside for the third time. Rich tries a sunset flip but gets caught in the claw, which is enough to give Spoiler the win at 6:58.

Rating: C. Spoiler seemed to be a solid monster villain and it shouldn’t be a surprise that he wound up being such a success. He had a look and could do some impressive things in the ring, which is more than enough to turn someone into a star. On the other hand you have Rich, who really didn’t show me much here. He seemed fine enough for a regional guy, but Spoiler beat him up pretty easily here, as he should have.

Post match the hold stays on a bit too long before Spoiler lets him go. A bunch of people come out to help Rich to the back but he’s mostly out of it.

Mr. R. vs. Ted DiBiase

This is an idea that you’ve seen a bunch of times, as Mr. R. is Tommy Rich under a mask following a suspension but everyone is in on the joke. R takes him down without much trouble and DiBiase is frustrated early. An armdrag puts R down for a change and DiBiase points to his head, more or less guaranteeing that he’s a villain. A headlock takeover takes DiBiase over with a headlock but he rolls out of it without much trouble.

R is right back with another headlock takeover and grinds away on the headlock as the fans are rather interested. It works so well that R does it a third time, with DiBiase getting frustrated. DiBiase can’t fight out with a top wristlock and the headlocking continues. Back up and DiBiase finally takes him down and starts in on the arm. The cranking continues but the Spoiler and Jesse Barr come in to go after R’s mask, which is enough for the DQ at 6:39.

Rating: C. This felt like more of an angle than a match and I can go with the idea of them just sending in the villains before things got serious. There is something to be said about R doing the obvious joke and it’s working well here. The fans were way more into this than anything else on the show and I’m not overly surprised given who was involved here.

NWA Junior Heavyweight Title: Les Thornton vs. Tommy Rogers

Thornton is defending and is quickly scolded for a shot to the ribs. Rogers grinds away on a headlock and gets rolled up, with Thornton even grabbing some trunks to show what a villain he is. It works so well that they do the same sequence again so Thornton headscissors his way out.

Rogers finally gets up and tries a sunset flip, only to get caught in the headscissors again. That’s finally broken up and Rogers grabs a headlock, which is AGAIN reversed into the headscissors. Back up and Thornton knocks him to the floor as we’re somehow almost ten minutes into this thing with almost nothing happening. A sunset flip gives Rogers two and Thornton’s butterfly suplex gets the same.

The chinlock goes on, with Thornton pulling him down by the hair to keep him in trouble. Back up and Thornton misses a charge into the corner as something actually happens. A knee drop gives Rogers two and he dropkicks Thornton out to the floor. Rogers belly to back suplexes him back inside but Thornton lands on top of him for two, because this is kind of a mess. Rogers hits a suplex and a top rope sunset flip for two but Thornton rolls him up and grabs the trunks to retain at 14:04.

Rating: C-. They picked things up a bit at times here but egads this was another dull match. It’s one of those matches where they were just sitting around waiting to do something and it made things so dull. The Junior Heavyweight Title has almost always come off as mostly boring stuff, which was the case again here. Just laying on the mat in a hold for long stretches of time isn’t interesting and the crowd was letting them know.

Nikolai Volkoff vs. Wahoo McDaniel

No entrances here for some reason. They circle each other to start and then stare at each other without the circling. Volkoff kicks him down and hits a running boot before going to the choking. McDaniel fights his way out of the corner but Volkoff is right back to hammer away as this is firmly in punch/kick territory.

A backbreaker gives Volkoff two and his pretty awesome gorilla press backbreaker gets the same. The bearhug goes on (you were just waiting on that one) but doesn’t last long, with Volkoff elbowing him in the face for two. McDaniel finally fights up and chops him to the floor, with the fans getting way behind the comeback. Volkoff misses a chair shot and McDaniel fights back but throws the referee down. That’s enough for the referee to call for the DQ at 5:51.

Rating: C+. This was starting to get somewhere and it made for a good enough power brawl. They weren’t exactly doing anything good here but it worked because the two of them were beating on each other like power wrestlers should. Not a great match, but it was entertaining enough.

Post match McDaniel stays on Volkoff, who runs away from the beating.

TV Title: Jake Roberts vs. Ron Garvin

Roberts, Paul Ellering, is defending and this was a huge feud. It’s so weird seeing Roberts in his pre-WWF days as he wrestles in a sleeveless shirt and pants instead of tights. Roberts takes him to the mat to start and grabs an armbar for some rather necessary cranking. The arm cranking ensues but Garvin gets up, sending Roberts backing up into the corner for a breather.

It’s already back to the arm, with Garvin seemingly nervous about throwing a punch (that feels like a plot point). The armbar goes on again, with Roberts grabbing the trunks to send the fans into another frenzy. Roberts uses the trunks again and then gets in a discussion with the referee over touching the rope. Garvin fights up and hammers away in the corner, including knocking Roberts out to the floor. Back in and Roberts is favoring his arm before bailing to the floor from an angry Garvin.

Roberts gets back in again and shoves Garvin down out of the corner. The armbar goes back on, with Roberts switching over to a chinlock. Garvin fights up and the fans are entirely with him but Roberts karate chops him back. The comeback is on though with Garvin firing off the big right hands to the ribs. Roberts’ shirt goes up to reveal a bunch of tape so Garvin hammers away. Roberts gets tied in the ropes so Ellering makes the save, only to get caught with a chair. The referee gets decked and Roberts hits a DDT onto the chair (that looked good), followed by an elbow drop for the pin at 13:26.

Rating: B-. This was a fairly basic match but the crowd was WAY into everything, with Garvin’s comebacks getting quite the reception. The arm/rib injuries were good additions and they made me want to see Garvin use them to get back against the cheating Roberts. You could see that this was part of a bigger story and that explained a lot of the reactions from the crowd. Best match on the shot thus far.

National Tag Team Titles: Road Warriors vs. King Kong Bundy/Stan Hansen

The Warriors, with Paul Ellering, are defending and this could be a mess. Hawk and Hansen lock up to start and neither can get anywhere with the power stuff. Instead, Hansen chops him up against the ropes, which works better than I would have expected. Animal (with a decent amount of hair) comes in but gets dropped by Bundy (no hair) as the fans sound pleased.

We settle down to Hawk coming in to face Bundy and the test of strength ensues. Bundy isn’t having any of this being kicked in the ribs thing and knocks Hawk backwards, setting up the bearhug. Hawk gets out but can’t whip Bundy out of the corner. A scream sets up a charge but Bundy gets the boot up without much trouble. Animal can’t slam Bundy so it’s off to Hansen for a headlock. Hawk comes in and gets hit in the face a few times as the fans approve.

An armdrag into the armbar (that feels so out of place in this match) has Hawk down again and Bundy drops a bit knee on the arm. The legdrop on the arm has Hawk in more trouble and it’s back to Hansen for some rapid fire elbows on the arm. Hawk actually gets over to the arm so Animal can work on Hansen’s arm for a change. The armbar goes on again and the fans are right there to cheer Hansen to freedom.

Animal splashes the arm to cut that off though and it’s back to Hawk for his standing armbar. The armbar goes to the mat for a good while before it’s back to Animal for the same. Back up and Hansen misses a charge into the corner, allowing Animal to bend the arm around the rope.

Hawk gets to continue the armbarring but Hansen fights up, drawing in Animal to cut him off almost immediately. Hansen fights up and hits a running knee, allowing Bundy to come in and clean house. The splash hits Animal for two as Hawk makes the save. Ellering seems to trip Bundy down and it’s a big four way brawl, with the referee throwing it out at 15:41.

Rating: B-. This took some time to get going but the weirder thing was seeing the Warriors as unpolished heels. They weren’t doing much of anything that would become their standard, including the rather lengthy armbars. While that part didn’t work so well, there was something to be said about the wild brawl at the end and seeing such a different version of the legendary team. And a hot tag to King Kong Bundy, which is not the most common thing to see.

Post match the brawl stays on and the Warriors bail, with Bundy shouting something into the microphone.

NWA World Title: Ric Flair vs. Brad Armstrong

Flair is defending, not long after winning the title at the first Starrcade. Armstrong’s National Heavyweight Title isn’t on the line here and he can’t be older than 21 or so. We get the old school referee instructions and a handshake gets us going. Flair backs him up to the ropes before wrestling him down but Armstrong reverses into a hammerlock. The standing armbar sends Flair over to the ropes so Armstrong switches to a headlock instead.

Flair fights up so Armstrong cranks on the head even more. Flair finally escapes and goes to a waistlock, only for Armstrong to reverse back into the headlock. This one is broken up much faster and Flair cranks on the arm, setting up the big chops. Armstrong isn’t having that and goes back to the armbar. That’s broken up as well and Flair adds in a handshake. They start running the ropes and Flair gets in a leapfrog, only to walk into a pair of dropkicks.

This time Flair needs a breather on the floor, which is more in his style. Back in and Flair fires off some shoulders in the corner but Armstrong cuts him off again and hammers away. A backdrop sets up another headlock but Flair forearms his way out a good bit faster this time. Not that it matters as Armstrong gets it on again, only for Flair to elbow him in the face. The knee drop connects (or as close as it gets) and it’s back to the corner for some shoulders to Armstrong’s ribs.

Flair gets two off a suplex and chops away in the corner but Armstrong fights out again. This time we get the Flair Flop before Armstrong slaps on a sleeper. Flair has to get his foot on the ropes, so Armstrong gets smart by crashing down onto the leg. Armstrong gets in his own suplex before grabbing the abdominal stretch. That’s broken up as well and they’re both down for a needed breather. Flair is up first and misses the big elbow, allowing Armstrong to whip him into the corner.

This time Flair actually gets stuck in something close to the Tree Of Woe, allowing Armstrong to knock him down. A backslide and O’Connor roll give Armstrong two each so Flair goes up top, only to get slammed back down. Right hands in the corner earn Armstrong a bit of a lecture, allowing Flair to chop away. Flair whips him into the corner but falls down on a slam attempt to give Armstrong two more. Back up and Armstrong hits a crossbody, with Flair rolling through and putting his feet on the ropes to retain at 20:49.

Rating: B. This was a good example of storytelling, as Flair was taking Armstrong lightly at first but got in trouble because he couldn’t keep up with him. Flair caught him later on and took over but Armstrong just kept coming at him until Flair had to cheat to win. It’s no masterpiece or anything but you could see Flair bringing him along in a basic but well put together match.

Flair leaves and we’re out pretty fast.

Overall Rating: B-. This show took some getting used to but you could tell the fans were into just about everything. The one thing that takes time to adjust to is how basic a lot of the matches were, as this was much more about simple action between people the fans cared about. It’s very different than what you get today and while it’s not perfect, there is an energy to it that works well. This was a great surprise from the WWE Vault, though it definitely takes some adjustment if you’re used to a modern style.

 

 

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NWA House Show – February 1, 1987: The Fans Like This

NWA House Show
Date: February 1, 1987
Location: The Omni, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 4,500

So the WWE Vault YouTube channel strikes again as we have a house show from some of the glory years of the NWA. The names included on the show are something of a who’s who of this era and that should make for a rather fun time. The main event is the Road Warriors challenging for the Tag Team Titles so let’s get to it.

Note that there is no commentary for this and it’s not the complete show, but we’re getting about an hour.

Dutch Mantell vs. Bill Dundee

Dundee’s Central States Title isn’t on the line. Mantell chases him around to start and grabs an armdrag as Dundee is shaken up early. A backdrop gives Mantell one and it’s time to work on Dundee’s arm. Back up and Mantell grabs his big whip, which is enough to send Dundee bailing to the floor (which is far from a cowardly heel move). Dundee gets back in and goes after the leg, setting up a front facelock to take over. The middle rope crossbody misses for Dundee so Mantell rolls him up, only for Dundee to reverse into one of his own and grab the tights for the pin at 5:12.

Rating: C. Not exactly a classic here but they kept things moving and didn’t spend too much time out there, making it a solid choice for an opener. Dundee is a great example of someone who wrestles bigger than his size, as he is not a big guy but makes you forget it, which is quite the trick. Mantell is best known for his talking, but he could more than hang in there with anyone.

Jimmy Garvin vs. Bob Armstrong

Garvin jumps him to start and hammers away in the corner. The brainbuster is loaded up but Armstrong slips out and elbows him in the face (with a cast) for the pin at 30 seconds. Ok then.

Brad Armstrong vs. Arn Anderson

Anderson has JJ Dillon and Lex Luger in his corner, the latter of whom seems to be making his debut. Anderson shoulders him down to start before grinding away on a headlock. Back up and Armstrong hits some dropkicks out to the floor, with the fans approving. A crossbody gives Armstrong one and he grabs an armbar to keep Anderson in trouble. They go to the floor with the arm being sent into the barricade, followed by more armbarring back inside.

Anderson can’t even get out of trouble by going to the eyes and Anderson is right back on the arm. An atomic drop out of the corner puts Armstrong down for a breather though and Anderson drops a knee for one. The Anderson Drop (later known as the spinebuster) gets a slightly delayed two but Armstrong punches him out of the air and starts the comeback. Armstrong loads up a suplex but Luger sweeps the leg, allowing Anderson to land on top for the pin at 8:10.

Rating: C+. And that’s how you introduce someone and have them pay instant dividends, as the fans immediately get that they need to pay attention when Luger is out there. The Horsemen were always going to be fine with some cheating to win and Luger lets them do it even more frequently. Nice stuff here in another fairly short match.

TV Title: Wahoo McDaniel vs. Tully Blanchard

Blanchard is defending and has JJ Dillon with him, plus the winner gets $10,000. McDaniel takes him into the corner to start and hits an elbow to the head, with Blanchard bailing out to the floor. Back in and McDaniel chops away again, with Dillon’s distraction completely failing. A rake to the eyes works a bit better for Blanchard and he snapmares McDaniel down into a chinlock. Blanchard punches him down for two more but McDaniel is right back with the signature chops. Lex Luger, apparently at ringside too, gets in a belt shot, to give Blanchard the pin at 5:11 (with the camera on Luger rather than the cover for a weird visual).

Rating: C. Similar story to the last match as Luger is able to screw over two popular stars in back to back matches. It’s easy to see why Wahoo was so popular as he looked tough and had some incredible charisma. Again though they didn’t have much time to build things up, which makes me wonder if there were about fifteen matches on the show or if the main event was going REALLY long.

Midnight Express vs. Ronnie Garvin/Robert Gibson

Elimination rules. Garvin is half of the US Tag Team Champions so the Midnights (with Jim Cornette and Big Bubba Rogers of course) could be feuding with either of them. Eaton hugs Cornette who gives him a kiss on the cheek before he drives Gibson into the corner to start. Gibson slams his way out of trouble and it’s time for Cornette to yell at a cameraman. Condrey comes in and gets slammed down as well before the good guys beat up both Midnights at once.

Cornette pulls Eaton out to the floor as Garvin rolls Condrey up for some near falls. A Bubba cheap shot puts Gavin down though and Eaton comes in for some choking behind the referee’s back, as a villain should be known to do. Condrey grabs the camel clutch so Garvin crawls over to the ropes in something you don’t see very often. That doesn’t work but a jumping headbutt does, allowing the hot tag to Gibson as the fans go NUTS. Everything breaks down and Cornette rackets Gibson for the elimination at 7:38.

The villains celebrate so Garvin rolls Eaton up to tie the score at 8:02, which would be used again by Randy Savage on Ted DiBiase at Survivor Series 1988. So it’s Condrey vs. Garvin, with Condrey slamming him down and dropping an elbow but not being able to keep the shoulders on the mat. Garvin’s rollup gets two and they collide for a double knockdown. They trade rollups for two each until Garvin’s big right hand gets two more. An elbow to the head gets the same but the Texas piledriver is countered Bubba gets on the apron but Garvin sends Condrey into him for the fast pin at 12:38.

Rating: B. Despite the really weird good guy combination, this was easily the most fun thing on the show so far and the fans were losing it for the ending. Garvin was someone the fans would get behind no matter what he was doing and they wanted to see him win here. You would normally associate Gibson with getting the win here, but this was good stuff with Cornette losing it as usual on the floor.

Post match the Midnights and company lay out the winners until Gibson gets the racket for the save.

Russians vs. Super Powers

The Russians talk trash before the match and Dusty gets laid out but Nikita makes the save with the chain. The Russians run off and the match is a DQ before it ever starts. Well that’s lame, but the fans were going nuts for Dusty and Koloff.

Tag Team Titles: Manny Fernandez/Rick Rude vs. Road Warriors

The Warriors, with Paul Ellering, are challenging and Paul Jones is here with the champs. Rude already has the slow robe reveal down and is basically what he would be in the WWF about a year later. Hawk doesn’t think much of Rude’s posing to start and shoves him down, setting up his own posing. Back up and Hawk wins a test of strength to take Rude’s hands to the mat for a good stomping.

Animal comes in to shoulder Rude down before doing the same to Fernandez as the fans heartily approve. The champs charge back in and are gorilla pressed out to the floor because you just do not do that to the Warriors. Back in and Fernandez is knocked outside again so let’s try Rude vs. Hawk again. A slam sets up Hawk’s middle rope clothesline (that always looked great) for two as Fernandez makes the save.

Fernandez gets in a cheap shot from the middle rope so the villains can take over, with an elbow to the face dropping Hawk. Rude’s top rope fist drop actually connects for two but Hawk grabs a quickly broken bearhug. The piledriver wakes Hawk up (as is his custom) and it’s a double tag to Animal and Fernandez. Everything breaks down and Animal hits a powerslam, drawing in Jones for the (delayed) DQ at 11:04.

Rating: C+. The Warriors are a great example of a team not having to do much to make it work because they were so popular that the fans were going nuts over anything they did. The ending isn’t that big of a surprise as it’s rather normal for a house show result. Fernandez and Rude would never be defeated for those belts, as Rude would leave for the WWF in April and the Rock N Roll Express got the belts in a phantom title change.

The only match missing is an hour long Broadway between Ric Flair and Barry Windham, which probably tore the house down.

Overall Rating: B-. It does feel incomplete without the main event but this was a heck of a fun hour of old school wrestling. You could hear the fans reacting like crazy to just about everything and you can see why the NWA was as hot as it was at this point. The business side of things would go downhill in a hurry, but the wrestling wasn’t the issue here. This YouTube channel is great and I could absolutely go for more of this kind of thing.

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HIDDEN GEM: Great American Bash 1988 (Greensboro): Just Another Summer Night

Great American Bash 1988 Greensboro
Date: July 16, 1988
Location: War Memorial Stadium, Greensboro, Coliseum
Attendance: 7,500

The Great American Bash wasn’t just a full on pay per view at first, but also a tour of house shows. This is one of them, as we are in one of the bigger Crockett cities. The main event here is WarGames, which had debuted twelve days prior and was done quite a bit during the tour. Let’s get to it.

Bugsy McGraw/Tim Horner vs. Rip Morgan/Larry Zbyszko

It’s always so strange to have A, no commentary, B, two rings, and C, Teddy Long (referee here) with hair. Morgan grabs the mic to shout a lot and jump up and down before Larry takes Bugsy down but misses a bunch of elbows to the fans’ delight. Bugsy drives him into the corner and grabs a headlock before Horner comes in for a few shoulders. The slightly out there Morgan tries his luck and takes Horner down into a quickly broken chinlock.

It’s back to Bugsy to start working on Morgan’s arm (the hair pull helped too) but Morgan takes him into the corner for the tag back to Larry. We get the always classic referee misses the big tag spot and Morgan elbows McGraw down again. Bugsy gets in a shot to the face though and grabs the rope to avoid Larry’s dropkick (yes Larry’s dropkick), allowing the hot tag to Horner. Everything breaks down and Horner hits a quick crossbody to finish Morgan at 8:07.

Rating: C. Totally watchable match here but what matters most is how it was a hot enough opening match. You don’t want to take too much time in a spot like this and they got through things rather well here. Horner wasn’t the best in the world but he was able to come in off a hot tag and clean house, which is almost all he was here for. Not a great match, but an efficient one and that’s a good thing.

Ronnie Garvin vs. Italian Stallion

Garvin is freshly heel and now managed by Gary Hart. Stallion knocks him down to start and Garvin grabs his ankle. That’s enough to have the referee slow things down a bit, but Garvin comes up with the Hands of Stone for the pin at 1:13. Just a way to establish that Garvin is a changed man.

Dick Murdoch vs. Gary Royal

Royal hits him in the face to start so Murdoch takes it into the corner. A headlock manages to get Murdoch down onto the mat and Gary cranks away for a bit. Murdoch gets out using some cheating so it’s time to yell at referee Teddy Long, which could be quite the interesting argument.

Royal gets driven into the corner for some shots to the face but a dropkick puts Murdoch on the floor. That’s enough of this being in trouble thing for Murdoch as he knocks Royal around without much trouble and takes him outside for a whip into the scaffolding (yeah we have a scaffold match coming). Back in and Murdoch stomps away before finishing with the brainbuster at 7:01.

Rating: C-. Murdoch really was good at almost anything he did and it is easy to see why he is as revered as he is by so many people. He knows how to make the fans care about him and is so smooth at everything he does. This was just a squash for the most part but Murdoch managed to make that work, which is quite the impressive feat.

Jimmy Garvin vs. Rick Steiner

Precious is here with Garvin. Steiner mauls him down to start, as Steiner had a tendency to do. Garvin fights up and slugs away but has to stop as Kevin Sullivan goes after Precious (that’s a LONG story) to a crazy reaction. Back in and Garvin rolls him up for the pin at 1:25. That was surprisingly short.

Sheepherders vs. Rock N Roll Express

That would of course be the Bushwhackers with Rip Morgan as their flag bearer. We hit the stall button to start, with the Bushwhackers messing with their flag and then telling the fans to shut up. Pain is promised to the Americans so Ricky Morton grabs the mic and tells the Sheepherders what they can kiss. The Express finally jumps them about two and a half minutes after the bell and the ring is cleared in a hurry.

We settle down into the first lockup almost four minutes in and it’s Butch sending Gibson into the corner for the early tag to Luke. A knee to the ribs cuts Gibson off again but he nails a right hand to take over. Butch hits Luke by mistake and Morgan takes out his friends, meaning the Express can pose early. We settle down to Morton in trouble but sliding through Luke’s legs for a dropkick.

The Sheepherders are sent into each other and it’s time to bail again as things settle a bit. Back in and Gibson hits a crossbody on Luke but Morgan has the referee, allowing Butch to get in a flag shot for the save. They go outside with Gibson being driven into the apron and then it’s back inside for stomping. A chinlock doesn’t last long so it’s a double clothesline to drop Gibson again.

The fans start up their ROCK N ROLL chant as Gibson gets in a few shots, only to be pulled down into a chinlock. Gibson fights up again and gets over to Morton for the hot tag (that feels so wrong). Everything breaks down with Morton getting posted on the floor as Gibson has Butch in a sleeper. The double gutbuster plants Gibson but he manages to send them together, allowing Morton to high crossbody Butch for the pin at 14:06.

Rating: B-. This is a perfect illustration of how to take a rather basic match and get the fans going nuts to set up a hot ending. That’s what they had here, with very little contact for almost the first five minutes and then they got into the meat of the match. The fans were with them the entire way because they cared about the teams and wanted to see the Express make the comeback. Good match, but much more of a lesson in how to do this, as the high spots were a dropkick and a high crossbody. Today, it would be called boring, because less is more is a lost concept.

Al Perez vs. Brad Armstrong

Perez has Gary Hart in his corner. Feeling out process to start with both guys shoving the other around. Armstrong grabs a wristlock and a monkey flip doesn’t even break the grip. Perez can’t armdrag his way out of an armbar so Armstrong armdrags him into another armbar. That works so well that Armstrong stays on it as we hit the five minute mark. Armstrong has to go after Gary Hart though and Perez sends him into the scaffolding to take over.

Back in and Perez hits what would become known as the Eye of the Storm for two and the chinlock goes on. With that not working, Perez goes with knees to the back (Armstrong: “OH S***!”) but the referee calls it off for being in the ropes. Armstrong’s backslide gets two so Perez throws him outside in a heap. Perez follows him out and gets elbows in the face so Armstrong heads back in. A suplex brings Perez back in and Hart sweeps the leg to give Perez the pin at 11:17 (that was the most telegraphed ending I have seen in years).

Rating: C. It wasn’t too bad here as Armstrong is always worth a look and Perez is someone who could have become something but never went beyond the midcard. I’m not entirely sure why, but I could have seen both of these guys going a bit higher than they did. Nice match though, even with the really obvious ending.

Fantastics vs. Midnight Express/Jim Cornette

The Midnight’s US Tag Team Titles aren’t on the line and I’m going to go out on a limb and say this is going to be the best thing all night, or at least so far. This is a Bunkhouse match, meaning anything goes. Cornette looks ridiculous in the body suit of course but you can see the look in his eyes that he is having the time of his life out there. Eaton and Cornette have their hug to start with Cornette kissing him on the cheek, so Rogers thinks Cornette should start for the team. Cornette: “I AIN’T GETTING IN THERE! YOU PEOPLE SHUT UP! I AIN’T GETTING IN THERE!”

The Bobbys start things off instead with Eaton getting in a right hand but stopping to celebrate, allowing Fulton to tag him with some right hands. Eaton hits a knee to the face but gets backdropped down, leaving Cornette to grab a chair on the floor. That earns him a chase from Rogers who clears the ring, setting up the strut. Cornette: “WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO???” Back in and Eaton hits Fulton with one of his great right hands and grabs a chair, only to get atomic dropped down onto it.

Fulton blasts Eaton with the chair and everything breaks down (as it should) with Rogers wearing Eaton out with the chair. Cornette and Stan get the chair and go over to check on Eaton as the panic continues. For some reason Eaton tries to tag Cornette before coming to his senses and bring Lane in instead. That’s fine with Rogers, who dropkicks him down a few times and mocks Cornette’s bravery. Lane tries to toss Rogers, who skins the cat and comes back in with more dropkicks.

Cornette bails from a possible tag again so Lane grabs him by the shirt, sending Cornette into pure panic because he might be about to die. Rogers breaks that up and gets sent outside, where Cornette throws a chair at him to get back in the Midnights’ good graces. Rogers gets dropped again and Cornette hits his own strut, leaving Lane to choke Rogers on the floor. Now Cornette is willing to come in and drop some elbows but Rogers stares him down after the right hands.

Cornette tries a quick handshake but gets driven into the corner where Lane can come back in (not the best aiming from Rogers). An atomic drop into a backbreaker puts Rogers down again and Cornette comes back in for some right hands with a chained fist. Cornette’s slam attempt doesn’t work so Eaton comes in to do it for him, leaving Cornette to pose anyway (that’s great).

The Rocket Launcher connects but Cornette wants the pin, which takes too long and includes too much posing, allowing Rogers to toss him hard on the kickout. The hot tag brings in Fulton to clean house and Cornette’s powder hits Eaton by mistake. A double clothesline pins Cornette at 15:09.

Rating: B. This was a lot of fun and so much of that is due to the great chemistry that the Midnights and Cornette had. They were so perfect together and Cornette’s moments of panicking at the idea of being in trouble but then getting so cocky in a hurry was great. Really fun match here and the place was going coconuts over some of the spots and chances for Cornette to get destroyed.

TV Title: Sting vs. Mike Rotunda

Rotunda, with Kevin Sullivan and Rick Steiner, is defending and EGADS the place goes nuts for Sting. Yeah I’m thinking he’ll be fine. Sting starts fast with some dropkicks, including one to Steiner to clean house in a hurry. Rotunda bails out to the floor but gets back in where he has to escape a Scorpion Deathlock attempt. It works so well that he has to do it a second time so Sting settles for a headlock instead. This time Rotunda sends him outside for a beating from Steiner and Sullivan, followed by a clothesline back inside.

We hit the chinlock to keep Sting in trouble and Rotunda makes sure to get a foot on the rope. An elbow to the face sets up the chinlock sequel but Rotunda goes up top for some reason. Since that leaves Rotunda looking like a fish on a bicycle, Sting slams him down and sends him into the other ring. There’s the big dive over the ropes and Sting is all fired up. The right hands in the corner set up the Stinger Splash but the Varsity Club comes in for the DQ at 10:16.

Rating: C. As usual, the action wasn’t the best part here but the fans were going nuts over everything Sting did. You could see that he was a hue star and he would eventually get the title early in 1989. First up though we had to see Rick Steiner taking it from Rotunda in one of the most underrated moments in the history of the NWA/WCW.

Road Warriors vs. Ivan Koloff/Russian Assassin #1

This is a scaffold match and the Warriors have Paul Ellering while the Russians have the eternally useless Paul Jones. The Russians start throwing powder, which is hardly safe. They slug it out in a hurry with Ivan already having to hang on while his legs dangle over the side. The same thing happens to Animal but he gets back up for a dropkick (Ok it was terrible but EGADS MAN!), which has Ivan in more trouble.

A bunch of stomping has Ivan hanging on the bottom of the scaffold and there he goes for the elimination. That leaves Assassin and Hawk fighting on the other end of the scaffold but Ivan comes up to choke Hawk with a chain. Hawk and Assassin start climbing down and Hawk knocks him off to win at 5:34.

Rating: D+. I’m never sure what to think of a match like this as it isn’t exactly a wrestling match, or at least certainly not a traditional one. The guys were doing what they could (and as someone scared of heights, I can’t get over that dropkick) but they had a pretty firm limit and that is ok given how hard it is to do something like this.

Four Horsemen vs. Dusty Rhodes/Paul Ellering/Lex Luger/Nikita Koloff/Steve Williams

And now, WarGames, which only debuted about two weeks ago. In case you don’t know the rules, you have five men per team and each one will send in a man each for a five minute period. After two minutes, the heels will win a coin toss to gain the advantage, meaning they will be able to send in their second man for two minutes. Then the good guys will tie it up for two more minutes. The teams alternate until everyone is in and it is the first submission wins.

Arn Anderson and Dusty Rhodes start things off with Dusty easily winning the early slugout. The big elbow has Anderson freaking out in the corner so let’s try a different ring. Dusty is right there with a running DDT and he sends Arn into the cage for the first time. Arn goes into the cage over and over and the blood is already flowing. Some shots to the leg put Dusty down though and Arn punches him into the other ring. Dusty punches him out of the air though and puts on the Figure Four until the Horsemen win the coin toss.

Barry Windham goes in for the Horsemen but Dusty lets go of the Figure Four want is waiting on him. Anderson gets in a cheap shot from behind though and Dusty gets caught in Windham’s claw. Choking and clawing ensue and it’s Williams coming in to even things up. Football tackles abound and Dusty is back into it (which doesn’t make the claw look like the most devastating hold).

Flair comes in to give the Horsemen the advantage back though and it’s time to send the good guys into the cage. Dusty is busted open and you know the Horsemen know how to go after that. Luger comes in to even things up again and it’s time to clean house but Flair hits him low. The chops in the corner just wake Luger up (as always) though and he cleans house again, including the right hands in the corner to Flair.

It’s Tully Blanchard in to give the Horsemen another advantage and he finds a chair to beat on Luger and Windham. Flair and Anderson start in on Luger’s knee, followed by a DDT to plant him hard. Nikita Koloff (who should not have hair) comes in and it’s Russian Sickles a go-go.

The right hands in the corner rock Flair (he took those so well) and it’s a lot of punching until JJ Dillion is in to complete the Horsemen team. That means a barrage of eye rakes and choking but Nikita gets in in the corner and unloads with mostly reckless abandon. Arn has Luger in some kind of leglock as Ellering comes in to complete everything. Everyone brawls until JJ misses a dropkick and Dusty grabs the Figure Four for the submission at 21:07.

Rating: B. It isn’t as great as the famous one from the 4th of July but this was a house show and they probably had done half a dozen of these by this point. How much of an effort are they going to put into making this one feel special? It is still a brand new match and something that felt like a spectacle, so going with a basic punch/choke/leglock formula here worked out fine.

Overall Rating: B. This was a heck of a fun show with some rather good matches and nothing bad. Above all else, it was great to see a house show with such a hot crowd who was into anything these people were going. The talent was there and it felt like an important show. Good stuff here and I can see why this was such a hot promotion at the moment. Compare this to Wrestlemania II from a few months earlier and the difference is all the more obvious. Check this out if you get the chance.

 

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Hidden Gems #14: The Battle After The Last Battle

IMG Credit: WWE

Hidden Gems #14
Date: 1983

Georgia Championship Wrestling House Show
Date: November 6, 1983
Location: Omni, Atlanta, Georgia

So you might have heard of the Last Battle of Atlanta, with the legendary cage match between Tommy Rich and Buzz Sawyer. Well this is the followup show and just about three weeks from the original Starrcade. This is another case where it’s out of my comfort zone but that can make for some awesome surprises. Let’s get to it.

This is NOT the complete show but I’ll try to fill in the gaps where I can.

It looks like we’re missing Les Thornton defeating Pat Rose in the opener and starting with the second match.

Brad Armstrong vs. Joe Lightfoot

They shake hands to start and it’s Brad grabbing a headlock. They go to the mat with that as this is already feeling like an NWA opener. Lightfoot gets to his feet and shoots him in, only to get crossbodied for two. It’s right back to the headlock takeover for another good stretch as we’re already four minutes into this. Back up and the headlocking continues until Brad hits some shoulders. An armdrag into an armbar doesn’t work on Joe as he reverses into a headscissors as we hit five minutes.

That’s broken up after a minute or so but Brad misses an elbow drop. Lightfoot hits the legdrop and we’re right back to the headscissors. Brad fights up again and blocks a monkey flip out of the corner so he can drop a knee for two. The spinning high crossbody misses though and it’s an atomic drop to send Brad back into the corner.

A backbreaker gives Brad a quick two with Lightfoot getting his foot (because it’s light you see) on the rope. Lightfoot kicks him out of the corner and hits a running forearm for two (and a good bump from Brad). What looked to be a top rope headbutt misses though and Brad grabs a small package for the pin at 12:36.

Rating: C-. This started off rather slowly but once they got off the mat, it wound up being perfectly watchable. That’s how you did an opening match back in the day though and if nothing else it’s a big relief to not have the twenty minute draw that it felt like at the beginning. Armstrong would go on to become one of the most consistent and underrated wrestlers of the era and you can see his potential in stuff like this.

TV Title: Jake Roberts vs. Ron Garvin

Roberts is challenging, has Paul Ellering in his corner and can only win the title in the first ten minutes of the match (as is customary). This is part of a long rivalry and they circle each other near the ropes to start. Garvin, with longer hair than usual here, cranks on a wristlock to put Jake down. That earns Garvin a whip to the floor but he’s right back in to knock Jake outside instead.

The stalling is on for a bit until Garvin drives him into the corner again. Ellering’s distraction doesn’t work either as Roberts gets knocked down and slammed into the middle for two. Jake stalls outside again but Garvin slugs him down one more time as this is totally one sided in the first five minutes.

More lefts and rights set up a middle rope knee for two but Jake finally gets in a knee to the ribs. We hit the chinlock with three minutes left in the title portion. Instead of going for something else, Roberts switches to an armbar and pulls on the rope for a change. A vertical suplex gives Jake two but Garvin slugs away one more time. There’s a rake to the back but Jake finds a well hidden weapon in the turnbuckle and hits him in the throat. The DDT gives Jake the pin and the title out of nowhere at 9:27.

Rating: C+. Points for the surprise here as they were setting up the draw (in the first ten minutes at least) to perfection here. The match saw Jake selling the whole time until he cheated to steal the title, just like a snake would. That sets up a ton of rematches (and there would be more than one) so it was a well done and surprising match which set up the future. Not bad at all for about ten minutes.

Post match Ellering gets the weapon away from Jake so that the referee can’t find anything in a great bit.

Jimmy Valiant vs. Great Kabuki

Kabuki has Gary Hart with him. Before the match, Valiant says it’s time to beat up some people, including the bald headed geek Gary Hart. Valiant gives Hart five seconds to get out before the beating is on, and then gets in the ring to deck Hart five seconds later. You can’t fault him for timing. With Hart on the floor, Valiant beats up Kabuki in a hurry and crotches him against the post.

Back in and we get some shaking knees, a thumb to Kabuki’s throat, and more knee shaking. After sending the referee into the corner, Valiant chokes away but the referee’s distraction lets Hart slip Kabuki something. That’s enough for a shot to the face and it’s time for Kabuki to start chopping. Those are cut off with the sleeper so Kabuki goes to the face again for another break. That earns Kabuki another sleeper so he rakes the eyes again to get out. Kabuki’s claw doesn’t last long so he kicks Valiant in the ribs.

The claw goes on again for two but Valiant fights up again. That means a lot of gyrating and dancing as the comeback is on. Naturally that is cut off by a third claw but this time Valiant sends him into the referee. Valiant slams Kabuki off the top and pulls out a chain for the right hands, drawing in Hart for the failed save. Valiant chokes him out with the chain and knocks Kabuki out with another right hand. Hart goes after Valiant again so it’s one more right hand….and Valiant pins Hart at 10:02? Makes as much sense as anything else.

Rating: D. Yeah this didn’t work. I know Valiant is someone who can work a crowd into a frenzy and I did like what he did to Hart before the bell, but there wasn’t much to be seen here as it was a lot of laying around with some dancing in the middle. Valiant has never been the kind of guy known for his in-ring prowess (and that’s fine) but I needed something more than this.

Buzz Sawyer vs. Abdullah the Butcher

Butcher has Ellering with him and Sawyer seems to be a face after being the biggest heel ever last time around. They brawl on the floor to start (well duh) and Sawyer is knocked all around ringside as Butcher is a different level of violent. Some postings have Sawyer rocked and bleeding early. A shot to the face knocks Sawyer over the barricade and a chair to the face makes it even worse. Sawyer shoves the referee and they actually get in the ring for a change. Butcher rips at the face with the trademark fork but Sawyer takes it away and gouges away with the fork as well. That’s finally enough for the double DQ at 4:16.

Rating: C-. I know it’s not much of a match but that’s kind of the point of something like this. You know what you’re getting with Butcher (I mean, his name is BUTCHER) and Sawyer could be a wild brawler in his own right. This wasn’t a good match, but it was a wild brawl that they were trying for and after a bad match before it, this is what they should have done.

Post match the brawl is on again with Sawyer using the fork again, both in and out of the ring. Butcher doesn’t want any help from the referee and knocks him down, with Sawyer taking out Ellering as well. The brawling continues and they choke each other a lot but things start to slow down a bit.

They get back inside with Butcher choking on the mat until they roll outside again. More choking and brawling take them into the crowd where the camera can’t quite follow them. We see them brawling even more until they’re FINALLY separated with Sawyer heading back to the ring. The brawl was twice as long as the match and you can imagine how many rematches they’ve set up.

We take an intermission, with the ring announcer saying a pair of glasses has been found. I love that kind of little touch to make it feel unique.

National Tag Team Titles: Road Warriors vs. Brett Wayne Sawyer/Dusty Rhodes

The Road Warriors are defending and have Ellering with them. The much smaller Sawyer grabs a headlock on Hawk to start before bouncing off of his shoulder. A pair of dropkicks have the Warriors staggered and you can feel the anger growing. Dusty comes in to face Hawk and you can feel the fans getting into things more than they have in a long time. The dancing shots to the head stagger Hawk and it’s off to Animal for a change.

The test of strength goes on but Sawyer slides through Dusty’s legs to get in a cheap shot on Animal in a unique spot. Animal gorilla presses Sawyer so it’s already back to Hawk, who can’t slam Dusty. Both Warriors get slammed though and the champs are livid. Back in and Sawyer hits Hawk in the face, which doesn’t seem to be the best career move. Animal comes in for some hardcore glaring so Sawyer grabs a headlock.

A shoulder takes Sawyer down again though and Dusty gets to try some more with Hawk. Dusty takes Hawk down with ease and gets in a kick that looked a good bit low. That means it’s already back to Animal, who is so sick of Sawyer’s headlocks that he throws him into the corner. Fair enough as that’s almost all Sawyer has done so far. Hawk slaps on a bearhug and it’s quickly back to Animal for one of his own.

The bearhugging continues and Sawyer has to get his arm up at two drops. With that out of the way, it’s right back to the bearhug. Now one might think that the Road Warriors shouldn’t be in a match this long at this point as they don’t seem ready for it, but Sawyer escapes and brings Dusty back in so we don’t have time to address that.

Dusty gets knocked down as well and Hawk grabs….a wristlock? We’re fourteen minutes into this and you grab a wristlock? Dusty gets out of that like it’s a wristlock and brings Sawyer in again as everything breaks down. Sawyer powerslams Hawk but Animal makes the save for two, with Dusty making another save. Everything breaks down and Ellering comes in for the DQ at 15:13.

Rating: D. I don’t think the Road Warriors have been in more than a dozen fifteen minute matches in their careers so doing this in 1983 was a REALLY questionable move with bad results. What exactly were they expecting out of a team with an arsenal of three moves when they were feeling like really working that night? Not good, but the Warriors were left out there to die and Brett wasn’t much better. So yes, Dusty was the most polished worker of the match.

Post match Dusty is sent outside and Sawyer gets destroyed until Buzz Sawyer finally runs in for the save. Buzz carries Brett out in a scene that does have some emotion to it.

Tommy Rich vs. Ted DiBiase

I believe Pez Whatley is the guest referee (it’s definitely a wrestler). They go right to the slugout to start with Rich knocking DiBiase outside. Back in and Rich punches him down again as DiBiase is getting angry. A dropkick and elbow to the head keep DiBiase in trouble and we hit the headlock takeover to slow things down. DiBiase rolls him up for two but can’t get out of the hold as you can hear wrestlers talking about what they want to do in the match.

The hold is broken and put right back on as the pace has dropped a good three gears in a hurry. It’s finally broken up for good with DiBiase hitting a backdrop but the piledriver is countered without much trouble. Therefore, it’s right back to the headlock as we’re almost five minutes in. Back up again and DiBiase knees him in the ribs but misses an elbow, allowing Rich to drop a knee for two. Now it’s a chinlock on DiBiase but he fights up and sends Rich into the corner for a stomping.

After an argument with the referee, DiBiase drops a knee for two and grabs a suplex for the delayed same. The choking is on until Whatley breaks it up, allowing Rich to get in some right hands. DiBiase’s middle rope elbow to the head gets two more and we’re right back to the chinlock. That’s switched to more choking but Rich kicks his way out of the corner. The middle rope fist drop misses DiBiase but Rich kicks him in the face for the double knockdown.

Now it’s Rich grabbing a sleeper because we haven’t had a hold in a few minutes. DiBiase breaks that up in a hurry and stomps away some more. This time Rich is busted open and DiBiase goes after the cut, including MORE CHOKING. Whatley finally pulls DiBiase off of Rich in the corner so the comeback can be afoot. The bloody Rich slugs away as some other wrestlers come in to try and break it up, only to get decked by Rich as well. They hold him back enough for DiBiase to get in some more shots but they fight is on again. It happens again and this time Whatley, who was helping break it up, calls for the bell at 16:59.

Rating: D. I’m not sure what this was supposed to be but it wasn’t exactly a great way to keep Rich looking like a big star. After all those years of feuding with Sawyer, maybe the fans just want to see something else. Or they didn’t care after nearly fifteen minutes of choking and chinlocks. Terrible main event and the lack of a reaction doesn’t bode well for Rich’s future.

Post match they keep fighting on the floor to an almost nothing reaction, with Rich being declared the winner, presumably because of the wrestlers going after him first when they were breaking it up. Otherwise, that makes no sense.

Overall Rating: D+. That’s about as good as it was going to get as the show just wasn’t all that good. The problem is that they were coming off one of the biggest feuds in the history of the south and now they have to follow that up. Couple that with Rich’s star power going down in a hurry, likely due to fatigue after that Sawyer feud, and there wasn’t much else that could be done here. This just wasn’t a very good show, but it was definitely interesting with no commentary and having to let the wrestlers make you understand the story on their own.

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Starrcade 1987: I Love A Good Request

IMG Credit: WWE

Starrcade 1987
Date: November 26, 1987
Location: UIC Pavilion, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Jim Ross

The main event here is a cage match between NWA World Champion Ronnie Garvin and Ric Flair.  Garvin won the title a few weeks back with the sole purpose of losing it to Flair here.  In a logic that I’ll never understand, everyone else said no except for Garvin because no one else wanted to be a lame duck World Champion.  Other than the Garvin vs. Flair title match, the other major match is the Road Warriors facing the Horsemen (Arn and Tully) for the tag titles in the Warriors’ hometown of Chicago. Let’s get to it.

We open with an intro sequence that looks like it’s out of a bad 1980s sitcom. It’s a bunch of headshots of the wrestlers with bad music in the background.

The arena looks huge but very smoky.

Sting/Jimmy Garvin/Michael Hayes vs. Eddie Gilbert/Larry Zbyszko/Rick Steiner

This is right after Jim Crockett acquired the UWF, so a lot of these guys are making their big time debuts. Gilbert was a big deal back there, as was Hayes. Sting didn’t mean anything at this point, but he would have his day very soon. He had recently left Gilbert’s stable in the UWF so they have a built in feud already. Steiner jumps Sting to start but misses a charge and falls to the floor. Sting dives out onto him as the lighting is really bad here. It looks like the lights haven’t been turned all the way on.

As they head back in, Sting hits a missile dropkick as everything breaks down. Sting’s team clears the ring until we get down to Hayes vs. Steiner. Michael pounds on the arm for a bit and it’s off to Garvin. Michael and Jimmy would wind up as a tag team in a few years but here’s they’re just randomly paired together. Off to Larry to fight Garvin and it’s time to stall already. Larry was legendary for stalling and it drove a lot of people crazy, myself included.

Back to Hayes who grabs Larry by the nose and pounds away. Michael struts and moon walks to get the crowd fired up as it’s off to Gilbert. Hayes avoids a right hand and struts some more before sending Eddie into the corner. Back to Sting as things speed up a bit, but at this point he’s not capable of carrying a match on his own. Sting grabs an armbar on Steiner and it’s off to Garvin for more basic offense on Rick.

Steiner takes him into the heel corner and it’s off to Larry for a spinning kick to Garvin’s ribs. A powerslam gets two for Rick and it’s off to Gilbert for an atomic drop. Gilbert stays on the back for a bit but misses an elbow drop. It’s not enough for the tag out though as Steiner comes in for the save. Off to a bearhug to further the punishment on Garvin’s back but Jimmy fights out. Larry saves another hot tag and puts on an abdominal stretch. Garvin finally hiptosses his way out of it and it’s off to Sting to pick up the pace.

Everything breaks down but Gilbert comes in with a cheap shot to the back to take Sting down. Eddie sends him out to the floor for a bit before throwing him back in for some triple teaming. It doesn’t seem to do much good as Sting counters a Zbyzsko suplex, only to be stopped by Steiner.

Sting avoids a charge from Larry and it’s off to Hayes with less than two minutes to go in the time limit. Everything breaks down and the good guys all pound away on a bad guy in a different corner. The DDT gets two for Hayes on Larry but he’s in the ropes. One minute to go as Steiner breaks up a sleeper on Larry. Steiner comes in legally for a bearhug of all things before turning it into a belly to belly suplex. Everything breaks down again and the time runs out with no winner.

Rating: C. This was probably the best opener the series has had yet and it’s very obvious that that’s not saying much. The main idea here was to introduce most of these people to the Jim Crockett audience and it only worked to a degree. Steiner actually came off looking the most polished here, but Hayes would have the immediate success. Sting would be several months away from his big break.

UWF Title: Steve Williams vs. Barry Windham

As mentioned, this is the final days of the title as it would be retired the next month. Williams is defending and is basically the Brock Lesnar of the 1980s: an All-American football player and a top level collegiate wrestler who looked and wrestled like a monster. If nothing else he has an awesome nickname of Dr. Death. Windham was considered the future of the company and potentially the business at this point, regularly tearing the house down with Flair everywhere they went. He’s also the Western States Heritage Champion, which might be the most worthless title in wrestling history.

We start with a crisscross before Williams throws Windham down and presses him over his head with ease. Considering Windham is 6’6, that’s rather impressive. Jim Ross LOVES Oklahoma so he’s a big time fanboy for Williams here. Windham tries to take it to the mat but can’t do anything with a wrestler the quality of Williams. Instead they take it to the floor and it’s a standoff. Back in and Williams easily suplexes out of a headlock, so Windham muscles him over with a gutwrench suplex of his own.

Williams puts on a headlock and Barry suplexes him down but this time the hold isn’t broken. It shifts into a chinlock but Barry shakes him off. They’re still in first gear here. They trade go behinds and Williams tries a leapfrog but Barry accidentally headbutts him very low. Barry stands around instead of going in for the kill and even stops the referee from counting Williams down.

Steve walks around holding his groin as the stalling continues. Windham finally takes him down with a headlock so Williams counters into a headscissors. That’s good for another standoff followed by a missed flying something from Barry, sending him over the top and onto the announce table. Back in and Williams grabs a quick rolling cradle to retain.

Rating: D. This was nothing and you can’t really blame the injury for it. They were looking terrible before the accidental headbutt and after that it somehow fell apart even more. I’m not sure what was going on here as these two are WAY too talented to have such a horrible match. To this day I’m confused by this match.

Rock N Roll Express vs. Midnight Express

This is another Skywalkers (scaffold) match which is an odd choice for these guys. These two teams redefined tag team wrestling with their incredible series of matches, so the company decides to put them in a match with no wrestling involved in it at all? The Midnights are the now Bobby Eaton and Stan Lane and they’re the US Tag Team Champions but this is non-title. They also have Cornette and Bubba with them.

Both teams are skeptical to go up but after over a minute and a half of waiting, everyone goes up top. Actually scratch that as Bubba pulls Morton down as he’s climbing and spikes him down onto the mat to give the Midnights a two on one advantage. Bubba tries to climb up as well but Morton gets up and steals Cornette’s tennis racket. A few shots to the back keeps Bubba down and Morton climbs up, still holding the racket. Eaton gets whacked a few times as well as the fighting really gets going.

Morton knocks Eaton around with the racket as Gibson pounds on Lane on the other end of the scaffold. Eaton busts out his trusty powder to blind Ricky and now Gibson is double teamed. Ricky gets the tennis racket back to stagger Bobby with as all four guys head back to the ends of the scaffold. Eaton drops the racket to the mat as Lane climbs under the scaffold.

Cornette throws the racket up to Eaton again so he can pound on Robert’s back. Morton heads under the scaffold to get at Stan, eventually kicking him down to the mat. Eaton and Gibson are up top still though until Ricky goes up too. The Rock N Roll finally knocks him down over the edge and down to the mat for the win. I know the ending sounds sudden but there really isn’t much else to it than that.

Rating: D+. Just like last year, what can you really expect from a match like this? They can’t do much without risking a very serious injury but you don’t want the fans to be bored out of their minds either. These guys had some of the best tag team matches ever when they were on the ground floor and I have no idea why they were given this gimmick of all things.

Post match Bubba goes up to fight Morton on the top, but, I kid you not, Morton points off in the distance to distract Bubba, allowing Morton to kick him in the groin and climb down. Ricky steals Bubba’s hat and coat for good measure.

NWA TV Title/UWF TV Title: Nikita Koloff vs. Terry Taylor

This is a unification match between the two Television Titles. Taylor has Eddie Gilbert with him as backup. Taylor grabs a headlock to start but is easily run over by a shoulder block. They head to the corner and amazingly enough we get a clean break. We go to another corner and Taylor tries a cheap shot, only to get punched in the face by Nikita. Taylor cranks on the arm so Nikita sticks his tongue out at him and puts on an armbar of his own.

Terry headbutts out of the hold but Nikita rams him shoulder first into the buckle. More right hands have no effect at all and Nikita cranks away on the wristlock into a hammerlock. Koloff muscles him down into a cover but Taylor makes the ropes and heads outside. Back in and Taylor talks some trash, earning himself a slap in the face. A backdrop gets two on Terry and its time for more stalling on the floor.

Nikita gets tired of waiting and pulls Taylor back in so he can put the hammerlock right back on. After a rope breaks saves Taylor, he pounds on Nikita in the corner but misses an elbow drop. Back to the armbar which has dominated this match so far. They get back up again and Taylor pounds away, only to be choked to the mat. The Russian Sickle misses though and Nikita charges into the buckle. They head outside with Taylor ramming Nikita’s shoulder into the post to take over.

The match slows down a lot as Taylor’s offense isn’t exactly suited to beat on someone like Koloff. He stays on the arm but can’t bring Nikita down into a sunset flip. Koloff blocks a suplex and takes the smaller guy down with a suplex of his own. Nikita has enough of the pounding and fights back with a bunch of right hands in the corner. Taylor comes out with an atomic drop to get two of his own and Koloff’s momentum is stopped cold.

A rollup gets two for Nikita as the fans are finally starting to get into the match. Terry loads up a piledriver but gets backdropped down and punched in the face. They head to the floor again but Gilbert hits Koloff in the knee to give Nikita control again. Off to a figure four on the Russian which gets a few near falls (the figure four can be used as a pin if the guy in the hold doesn’t raise his arms). Koloff finally gets the ropes and beats up Gilbert before hitting the Sickle on Taylor for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D+. This didn’t work for me. It was nearly twenty minutes long and way too much of that was spent in a hammerlock. I’ve never been a fan of Taylor but at least Koloff was there with the hard hitting stuff to make things somewhat interesting. This wasn’t terrible but it was too long and dull for what it was worth.

Tag Titles: Arn Anderson/Tully Blanchard vs. Road Warriors

The Warriors are challenging in their hometown of Chicago. Arn and Hawk start things off with Hawk taking him down via a top wristlock. Anderson is sent to the floor for a staredown with the Warriors’ manager Paul Ellering. Off to Tully who is almost immediately sent to the floor. Animal will have none of this stalling though and sends him right back inside. Hawk pounds away even more and hits a dropkick for a quick near fall.

Off to Animal who catches Blanchard coming in off the top in a powerslam for another two count. Arn comes back in and manages to avoid a charge in the corner, only to have his head taken off by a clothesline from Animal. Blanchard tries to come in but gets punched right in the jaw as well. Both Horsemen try to go after Hawk, only to get clotheslined down for a near fall on Blanchard. Total dominance by the Warriors so far.

Back to Animal for a bearhug plus a right hand from Hawk. Animal drops Tully down and Blanchard goes bailing to the corner. A dropkick to the ribs puts Blanchard down again so he tags in Anderson. Animal has to chase Arn on the floor before coming back inside to gorilla press him down. A press slam on Tully by Hawk is broken up by Arn hitting Hawk in the knee and the Horsemen FINALLY take over.

Tully adds in a chair shot to Hawk’s knee on the floor and a DDT gets two for Arn back in the ring. Blanchard’s figure four is countered into a small package so Tully pounds on the knee a bit more instead. Arn’s spinning toehold is broken up but here’s Tully again for the figure four. For some reason he tags in Anderson with Hawk still in the hold, and it’s Anderson who gets crotched to allow the hot tag to Animal. Everything breaks down and Tully accidentally knocks the referee to the floor before Hawk throws Anderson the floor. Back in and there’s the Doomsday Device on Arn for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C. This took awhile to get going but once the Road Warriors got rolling it got awesome in a hurry. They’re such a physical and dominant team that it’s almost impossible to not get fired up watching them. The leg work here by the Horsemen was much more interesting than say the arm work by Taylor, as they have the size and ability to make you believe the Warriors were in trouble.

Oh and scratch that title change because Anderson was thrown over the top, meaning the Warriors are disqualified and the Horsemen keep the belts. Say it with me: Dusty Finish. The fans boo this out of the building and with good reason. Who does this help? The Warriors look inept because they didn’t get the win, the Horsemen look like weak champions because they got pinned, and the fans are mad because at STARRCADE we can’t change the belts. Just a dumb idea all around.

US Title: Lex Luger vs. Dusty Rhodes

Luger is defending and if he wins, Dusty is suspended for ninety days. This is also inside of a cage. Luger had recently turned on Dusty to join the Horsemen, angering the fat man. Legend Johnny Weaver has the key at ringside. They circle each other as Dusty pretends to have a physique to match Luger, who would be a guest performer on some bodybuilding shows a few years after this. Both guys seem tentative to start things off here. Luger pounds away to start but misses his big jumping elbow. Dusty goes to an armbar and pounds an elbow into the shoulder. The armbar stays on for a LONG time, as per Dusty’s custom.

Luger finally pushes him into the corner….but it’s right back to the armbar. Rhodes pounds on the arm in the shoulder but takes a knee to the fat stomach to put him down. Dusty goes face first into the cage and we’ve got some blood on the challenger’s head. A clothesline gets two for Luger and the beating begins. The big jumping elbow gets two on Dusty but Luger takes too long, allowing Dusty to hit a HORRIBLE dropkick to put both guys down.

Lex can’t quite Rack (his finisher is the Human Torture Rack, meaning he puts Dusty over his shoulders and bends Dusty’s back around Luger’s own neck) Dusty so he pounds away instead. Now it’s off to an armbar on Dusty to take him down, despite Luger spending the entire match working on the back so far. They get back up and a pull of Dusty’s hair takes him right back down. Luger pounds away in the corner and Dusty just stands there without reacting at all.

Instead he flips Luger off and pounds away before hitting a bad DDT to put both guys down again. Off to a sleeper by Rhodes with him jumping on Luger’s back for good measure. JJ Dillon, Luger’s manager, blasts Weaver with a chair before throwing said chair into the cage. Lex escapes the hold and spends a LONG time bending over to pick up the chair, allowing Dusty to “DDT” him onto the chair for the pin and the title.

Rating: D. This sucked for the most part, as Dusty spent WAY too much time laying around on the mat before we had that really lame ending. There’s no reason for Dusty to win this title other than he was the booker and decided he wanted it, especially given how Luger was the future of the company at this point. Terrible match with a bad looking finish to top it off here.

NWA World Title: Ric Flair vs. Ron Garvin

This is also in a cage with Garvin defending, having won the world title in September and then basically disappearing for two months because no one wanted to job to a guy who was going to lose the title in a few months anyway. Flair gets a tremendous ovation while Garvin is pretty much booed out of the midwest. They chop it out to start with Flair losing as it’s early in the match. We get the Flair Flop followed by a backdrop by the champion into an armbar.

Garvin pounds away in the corner with ten punches and Flair is in trouble. With Flair down we get the Garvin Stomp, meaning Garvin stomps in a circle, hitting every limb and culminating with the head. Flair wins a slugout but hits Garvin low to take him down. An atomic drop has flair in even more trouble and a big knee drop gets two on the champion. It’s time to go after the leg and just a few seconds later it’s off to the Figure Four. Flair cheats by using the ropes but Garvin finally turns the hold over, leading to a break.

Back up and the champion blocks a shot into the cage. He blocks a second one and manages to send Flair into the cage a few times in a row. Flair has his forehead raked across the cage before tasting the steel again. Garvin bites Flair’s head to bust him open as they go to the top rope. Flair falls down before getting some hard chops in the corner from Garvin. After an elbow to the head, Ric goes up but gets slammed down as per his custom. Garvin puts on his own figure four but Flair makes the ropes pretty quickly.

Ron rams him into the cage and gets two off a top rope cross body and the same off a backslide. The fans are starting to get into this a bit. More chops have Flair in trouble and they go up top again. Ric gets crotched on the top rope and Garvin tries the top rope sunset flip which won him the title a few months ago. This time though Flair falls forward and grabs the ropes for two. Garvin pounds away in the corner but Flair shoves him off and crushes the referee. Ron hits his big right hand for two and sends Garvin into the cage for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. It’s not a bad match, but at the end of the day no one bought Garvin as having a change to hold the title here. Flair winning the title back isn’t really a big moment but the reaction from the fans was odd, given that Ric was the big face here. Garvin would never come close to this point again, which he likely shouldn’t have.

Overall Rating: D. This just didn’t work. It’s not a horrible show, but at the same time there’s nothing on here worth looking at whatsoever. The best match is probably the main event and that’s just ok at best. There’s just nothing to see here at all and the fans didn’t care either. The WWF dominated this night by having almost every cable provider air their far better show. Just not a good show, although it’s still better than 1984 by far.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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Starrcade 1986: I Miss Magnum

Starrcade 1986
Date: November 27, 1986
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina/The Omni, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 16,000/14,000
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Rick Stewart, Bob Caudle, Johnny Weaver

Much like last year, this show had a subtitle: Night of the Skywalkers. In this case it was because of a tag team scaffold match, meaning a scaffold was hung up above the ring and the team to knock their opponents to the mat below would win. Also we have the Andersons challenging the Rock and Roll Express in a cage for the world tag team titles. Let’s get to it.

Jimmy Garvin vs. Brad Armstrong

Garvin is billed as Gorgeous Jimmy here and comes out to Sharp Dressed Man by ZZ Top. He also has a good looking blonde named Precious with him. The first match here is in Atlanta and we’ll be alternating back and forth. Schiavone and Stewart are the commentators here in Atlanta as well. They fight up against the ropes to start before heading into the corner with neither guy being able to get an advantage.

They go to the mat with neither guy being able to get any extended advantage. Back up and they fight over a top wristlock until Brad finally takes over with an armbar. Off to a headlock instead but Jimmy rolls Brad up for two. Now Jimmy grabs an armbar of his own but they roll into the ropes. Garvin grabs a leg lock and bends the knee back, only to have Armstrong reach his arm around into a chinlock to escape.

Off to an armbar by Brad and Jimmy taps, but that wouldn’t mean anything in American wrestling for about seven years. Garvin counters into a headscissors as the back and forth mat work continues. Armstrong nips out of it and puts on another headlock, only to be countered into another headscissors. By this point you should be able to figure out what happens next on your own: Armstrong counters into a headlock.

Garvin tries to pick Armstrong up to slam him down, only to be dragged into another headlock to keep the match at a very slow clip. Back up and Jimmy suplexes out of the hold but can’t immediately follow up. Armstrong gets sent out to the floor where Precious talks trash as we have three minutes left in the time limit. Back in and Garvin gets two after dropping Armstrong throat first onto the top rope.

A backbreaker gets the same and Jimmy is getting frustrated. They start running the ropes, only to crack heads and put both guys down again. Back up and Brad charges into a knee in the corner but even that only gets two. They trade rollups but Garvin puts on a chinlock of all things with fifteen seconds to go. He releases the hold and goes up, only to miss a top rope splash as the bell rings for the time limit draw.

Rating: D+. This was one of those matches where you could see the time limit draw coming a mile away. As is the Starrcade custom, the good guy can’t win the opener and the opener is pretty dull stuff. Why they’re so afraid to allow a good match to open the show is beyond me, but this was nothing of note at all. Neither guy would ever do much of note either.

Post match Garvin tries to jump Armstrong, only to get knocked to the floor by some right hands.

Hector Guerrero/Baron Von Raschke vs. Shaska Whatley/Barbarian

Whatley and Barbarian are members of Paul Jones’ Army while Guerrero and Raschke are kind of an oddball tag team. It’s a big brawl to start with the Baron pairing off with Whatley as Hector sends Barbarian out to the floor. Hector and Shaska start things off with Guerrero hitting some fast paced offense for early control. It’s off to Barbarian though to drop Hector throat first across the top rope, stopping his momentum cold.

Barbarian misses a running boot into the corner though and falls to the floor, allowing Hector to hit a BIG dive, taking out both Barbarian and Baron. That was a very big deal back then and still looks good even today. Whatley comes out to beat on Hector before throwing him inside for a gorilla press slam by Barbarian. A double backdrop puts Hector down for two and Whatley breaks up a potential hot tag to Baron.

Back to Barbarian for another near fall off a big boot followed by a backbreaker. Whatley sends him into the ropes and Hector spits right in his face, which is somehow enough for the hot tag off to the Baron. Raschke puts his Claw Hold on Shaska as everything breaks down. Barbarian breaks up the hold but gets pummeled in the corner by Hector. In the melee, Shaska misses a charge into the corner and Baron drops an elbow for the pin.

Rating: C. Just a basic tag match here which was fine for the most part. There was talk of a grudge coming in but there was not actual explanation given of what the feud was over or how everyone was involved. Baron seemed much more angry than Hector but that’s normal for the both of them. Nothing bad here but it’s just a tag match.

Post match Baron gets beaten down until Hector makes the save.

US Tag Titles: Krusher Khrushchev/Ivan Koloff vs. Kansas Jayhawks

The Jayhawks are Bobby Jaggers and Dutch Mantell, the latter of which would eventually join the WWE under a variety of names, including Zeb Colter. This is a rematch of a tournament final where the Russians won the belts and there are no disqualifications. Dutch and Ivan start things off but it’s quickly off to Jaggers to pound away on the older Russian. Ivan actually busts out a rollup for two but it’s quickly back to Dutch to work on the arm.

Krusher gets a tag in and it’s time for some stalling. Mantell pounds away on the forehead and the Jayhawks choke away in the corner before it’s off to Jaggers again. That goes nowhere so here’s Dutch again, but those sneaky Russians trick him into some double teaming. The power of AMERICA saves him from the Russians though and Dutch fights both guys off with relative ease. Ivan sends Dutch to the floor though and into the barricade to shift control.

Off to Krusher for some double teaming, but Dutch fights back with a double clothesline and there’s the hot tag to Jaggers. Some AMERICAN right hands have the Russians in trouble and a clothesline gets two on Ivan. Everything breaks down but there’s nothing the referee can do because it’s no disqualification. Ivan goes up top but gets hit by Dutch’s whip to bring him down. Krusher is sent to the floor but sneaks back up onto the apron to hit Jaggers in the back of the head with the chain, allowing Ivan to get the easy pin to retain the titles.

Rating: C. Another basic tag match here but it was at a slightly faster pace, making it a more entertaining match for the most part. The Russians continue to be a perfectly fine midcard heel act as the Cold War was still going on at this point. The Jayhawks never did much of anything as a team and would fade into obscurity pretty soon after the start of the new year.

Rick Rude vs. Wahoo McDaniel

Rude is a newcomer and not very polished in the ring but he would get WAY better. This is an Indian strap match, meaning they’re tied at the wrist and you have to drag your opponent around the ring and touch all four buckles to win. If your opponent breaks your momentum though, you have to start again. Rude spends too much time posing so Wahoo whips him with the strap. Wahoo scares Rude’s manager Paul Jones off and we’re ready to go. This is the third of four Starrcades where a match featured people being tied together. It’s a popular idea for some reason.

Wahoo immediately takes him down by the rope and Rude runs to the floor. That gets him nowhere as Wahoo pulls him right back inside with a casual tug. Rude sends him into the corner and wraps the strap around his fist to pound away on Wahoo. With McDaniel down, Rude ties Wahoo’s hands together with the rope and touches two buckles, only to have Wahoo grab the rope with his feet. Wahoo chokes away in the corner with the strap and now it’s Rude in trouble.

In a smart move, Wahoo grabs both of Rude’s hands and drags him around the ring while touching the buckles with his head. He gets three buckles but Rude kicks him down to break the streak. Rude goes up top for some reason, only to be pulled down with ease by the much stronger Wahoo. McDaniel crawls around and gets to the third buckle, only to have Rude knock him into the fourth for the surprising win.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here at all as is the case with most of the four corners variety of these matches. At the end of the day, the ending is almost always the same with only some mild alterations and this was no different. Wahoo wouldn’t be around much longer while Rude would be in the WWF by July.

Post match Rude and Jones beat Wahoo down until Hector Guerrero and Von Raschke make the save.

Central States Title: Sam Houston vs. Bill Dundee

This is another regional title from Kansas/Missouri with Houston defending. Dundee is from Australia and was a Memphis mainstay for years. Houston only won the belt about two weeks before this, beating Dundee in a tournament final. Again, why not have the tournament final here? Sam takes over with an armbar to start, only to be thrown to the mat by Dundee. They trade headlocks and rollups on the mat with Dundee finally getting control.

Back up and Houston takes him down with a flying headscissors to over on the mat. Now a dropkick puts Dundee down but he comes back with a classic hair pull to take the champion to the mat. Sam grabs a headlock of his own and a rollup out of the corner for two. In a scary sounding spot, Dundee pulls Sam out of the floor and onto the announce table to really take over for a change.

Scratch that again as Dundee goes out to get him, only to be dropped onto the barricade to keep Houston in control. Back in and Sam pounds away but charges into a boot in the corner. A top rope punch to Houston on the mat gets a close two for Bill and it’s off to another chinlock. That gets Dundee nowhere so here’s a Boston Crab instead. A top rope shot to Houston’s head gets two and it’s off to a front facelock.

Sam fights up and elbows Dundee down before dropping a pair of knees. Only the first one hits though so Bill goes after the knee. He puts on a spinning toe hold but Sam kicks out of it, losing his boot in the process. Dundee crashes into the referee and blasts Sam with his own boot, but gets caught and disqualified. For what? The boot is legal on Sam’s foot but not when it’s off of Sam’s foot?

Rating: C-. Not a terrible match or anything here but it never went anywhere. Houston just wasn’t that interesting to watch most of the time, primarily due to being such a small guy. Dundee was much better down in Memphis and never quite clicked on the big stage for some reason. Not a bad match but just kind of there for the most part.

Dundee beats on Houston with the boot post match. He would win the title in early January.

Jimmy Valiant vs. Paul Jones

Remember when these two were fighting at Starrcade 1984? This is a hair vs. hair match with Valiant putting up his female companion (that’s the best way to describe her) Big Mama’s hair against Jones’. This isn’t their first hair match either as I think they wound up having three in total. Jones’ main guy Manny Fernandez is going to be locked in a small cage above the ring to prevent interference. It takes a small army of wrestlers to get Fernandez inside the cage.

Valiant pounds away on a terrified Jones to start and Paul just tries to hide. Jones sticks his chest out to be scratched by Valiant, who is in orange and black striped tights for some reason. Paul pulls out a foreign object to pound away at Valiant for two. Jimmy fights up and kicks Jones in the leg before being knocked back down again. Paul tries the Indian Deathlock but Valiant fights up and pounds Jones down before locking in the sleeper. Jones tries the foreign object again but Valiant takes it away and knocks Jones out for the pin.

Rating: D-. This was pretty terrible and I have no idea why this feud went on for so many years. Valiant was a popular guy but nothing more than a glorified comedy act while Jones might be the most worthless manager of all time. When you have two stipulation matches in three years with no break in the feud, that’s way too much interaction between the same two people.

Post match Valiant cuts the hair but Manny Fernandez gets out of the cage, allowing he and Rick Rude to lay out Valiant. They hit a double DDT onto a chair and leave with their humiliated manager.

Ron Garvin vs. Big Bubba Rogers

Garvin is Mid-Atlantic Champion but this is non-title. It’s also a street fight and Bubba, a 400lb monster who can move very quickly and is dressed as a gangster for lack of a better term, has Jim Cornette as his manager. You can only win by pinfall or knocking someone down for a ten count. Why not just cover them for three instead of waiting the extra seven seconds? Falls count anywhere also. Oh and this is a Louisville (Cornette’s hometown) street fight in Atlanta.

Garvin gets in some quick right hands to stagger Bubba so the big man asks for a test of strength. Ron agrees but sucker punches Bubba down in a smart bit. Garvin is in street clothes here which works for a street fight. Back in and Bubba throws Garvin onto the announce table and out to the floor as we pause again. While out there, Garvin picks up a drink and throws it in Bubba’s face to get an advantage. He goes NUTS on Bubba, pounding him out to the floor with rights and lefts.

Back in and Garvin chokes away but Cornette slipped Bubba something and a shot to Ron’s head changes control again. Bubba punches him down a few times for a couple of four counts but Ron comes back with more punches. Garvin pulls out a rope of some kind and ties Bubba’s leg down with it before choking away. Bubba comes back with some right hands of his own and slaps on a bearhug like any good monster would.

Garvin doesn’t appear to be in pain at all and headbutts his way out of the hold. A BIG right hand puts Rogers on the floor and he’s almost out cold. Back in for, of course, more punching from Garvin. Bubba is knocked to the floor where he gains control by the power of fat, but as they go back in Ron slams him down off the top rope.

The referee is crushed (as has happened A LOT tonight) and Ron piledrives Bubba down, only to have Cornette blast him with the tennis racket. The referee gets up and counts both guys out to ten, but there has to be a winner. It’s the first man to his feet gets the win apparently, and with Bubba distracting the referee, Cornette nails Ron in the knee with the racket to give Bubba the easy win.

Rating: D+. This didn’t do it for me. Garvin throws a decent punch, but other than that there was nothing to see here from either guy. It wasn’t terrible or anything but I need more than eleven minutes of punching and a screwy finish with Cornette hitting Ron in the knee with a tennis racket. Not much to see here.

TV Title: Tully Blanchard vs. Dusty Rhodes

This is a first blood match as the gimmicks continue. Tully is challenging and has JJ Dillon with him here. The referee stops JJ from putting either protective gear and Vaseline on Tully’s head. Instead Dusty elbows Dillon in the head to bust him open. That’s quite the message. Tully misses a knee in the corner to start and they circle each other a bit. Both guys go after the others’ head but no contact is actually made.

They circle each other even more until Dusty hits a headbutt to put Tully down. As expected the referee checks both guys because using a headbutt in a first blood match is a stupid idea. Rhodes pounds at the ribs in the corner before hitting the Bionic Elbow to the head. Dusty lays down on the leg, because leaving your head exposed like that could NEVER backfire on him at all. Blanchard rolls to the floor and we stall again.

Back in and Tully drops an elbow and rakes at Dusty’s head only to have Rhodes come back and drop a knee. The referee goes down (AGAIN) and JJ throws in his signature shoe. Rhodes throws it away and elbows Tully in the head. A bunch of right hands bust open Blanchard’s head but there’s no referee. Tully is knocked down, allowing JJ to rub Vaseline on the cut to stop the bleeding. He also hands Dusty a roll of coins to knock Dusty out cold and bust him open for the title.

Rating: D-. This was about seven minutes of stalling and covering heads before the overdone ending. The referee bumps are getting really old at this point as there have been what, five or six so far on this show? Dusty continues to not have much in the ring aside from one good match with Flair last year. This was very little to see due to all of the stalling.

Midnight Express vs. Road Warriors

This is the scaffold match, meaning there’s a scaffold about fifteen feet above the ring and you have to knock your opponents off to win. The Express is Bobby Eaton and Dennis Condrey and they have Cornette and Bubba with them. On the other hand we have Hawk and Animal, the Road Warriors. These two were BEASTS who were basically indestructable and insanely popular.

Condrey thinks about going up to face the Warriors but climbs back down because he’s not that crazy. Cornette, who is legitimately terrified of heights, goes on a rant about how this isn’t civilized. Dennis and Bobby finally get up top and the punishment begins. The scaffold is maybe three feet wide and there are no railings on it at all so they can barely move up there. There are some railings at either end so at least there’s some safety up there.

The Express throws powder in the Warriors’ eyes to blind them which is pretty terrifying this high up. Hawk’s legs go over the edge but he crawls back up. Animal is laying down with one leg dangling over and Bobby winds up hanging from said leg. He manages to swing back over to the structure and climb back up as this continues. Condrey is cut open and tries to climb down the ladder but he gets rammed into the scaffold for his efforts by Hawk.

Condrey and Hawk get under the scaffold and kick at each other with Condrey trying to monkey bar away. Animal and Bobby join them and a few moments later the Express get kicked down, giving the Road Warriors the win. As someone who is scared of heights, my stomach can now calm down.

Rating: D+. This is a hard one to grade as it’s hard to criticize them for moving around so slowly given the fear of potential death involved. There’s only so much you can do that high in the air with no safety rails and they did as much as they could have. The Road Warriors would move on to feuding with the Horsemen soon after this.

Post match we get the famous part of the match as Cornette goes up top and runs into Animal. Cornette tries to climb down and winds up hanging from the bottom of the scaffold. He drops down…and Bubba isn’t there to catch him. Jim lands on his legs and basically destroys both of them, causing him problems for the rest of his life. Cornette tries to shout to Bubba to carry him to the back because his legs don’t work but his legs are so destroyed that he can’t get his point across. Animal later said in interviews that it was the funniest thing he’s ever seen.

World Tag Titles: Arn Anderson/Ole Anderson vs. Rock N Roll Express

The Express is defending and this is inside a cage. You win by pinfall here and have to tag in and out so it’s Robert Gibson vs. Ole to start, but everything breaks down in just a few seconds. Arn winds up in there with Robert and Gibson rams his head into the cage a few times to send Arn over for a tag. Off to Ricky vs. Ole but Ole gets kicked in the face, sending it back to Arn.

Things slow down a bit with Arn being afraid to go after Ricky again. Morton grabs the arm and it’s off to Robert for some arm work. He misses a running knee in the corner though and Arn goes after the leg. Ole comes in to cannonball down onto the leg before it’s back to Arn. Robert kicks him into the cage to counter a figure four, but Ole breaks up the hot tag to Ricky.

Back to Arn again as the leg work continues. It’s odd to see the Andersons working on a leg instead of an arm but it’s a limb nonetheless. Robert FINALLY hits an enziguri for the hot tag off to Morton, but Ole immediately sends him into the cage to stop him cold. Now we get to the arm work and things instantly feel better. Arn comes in to stomp Morton down and it’s back to Ole to whip Ricky shoulder first into the corner.

Off to an armbar as Ricky appears to be busted open. There’s the hammerlock slam from Arn but he makes the eternal mistake of going up top. Much like Flair, Arn has almost never been able to hit his shot off the top and it’s the same here. Morton punches him on the way down but Ole breaks up the tag yet again. A shoulder breaker gets two and Arn wraps the bar arm around the top rope. Ricky comes back with a clothesline and both guys are down.

Ole gets the tag and kicks Ricky in the arm to keep him down as the torment continues. Off to another armbar but Ricky gets in a shot to the ribs and several the head to come back. Arn takes Morton down yet again to prevent a tag before hitting the yet to be named spinebuster for two. Ole comes off the top for a knee into the arm and cranks on another armbar. Ricky is in big trouble here.

Back up and Ole collides with Ricky while running the ropes to put both guys down. Arn breaks up the tag (I’m having deja vu from typing that so many times) but Ricky headbutts him down and…..gets jumped by Ole. Out of nowhere Ricky grabs a small package for two as everything breaks down. Ole picks up Ricky for a slam but Robert dropkicks Ricky’s back and knocks him down onto Ole for the pin to retain out of nowhere.

Rating: B+. I really liked the curve ball they threw us in here by not having the hot tag which the standard tag team formula would suggest there would be. This was Playing Ricky Morton as I mentioned in last year’s show and it was done to perfection. He could take a beating like no one else could and the fans totally bought into it every time. Really good old school tag team match here.

We get a highlight reel of Magnum TA who had to retire at age 27.

NWA World Title: Ric Flair vs. Nikita Koloff

Koloff is US Champion coming in. The problem here again is that there’s no real reason for these two to be fighting but it’s all the NWA could do given the circumstances. The referee explains the rules to both guys and with a WOO from Flair we’re ready to go. Koloff easily shoves Flair down to start which doesn’t seem to surprise him. Nikita flexes at him and the champion heads to the floor to think this over. Back in and Nikita twists Flair’s hand around, sending Flair into chop move. Nikita just stares at Ric so the champ bails again.

Back in and Ric can’t hiptoss him, but Nikita can throw Flair around with ease. Flair is LAUNCHED across the ring in a few slams and it’s all Nikita so far. Off to a bearhug and Koloff leans forward with it for a few near falls. Flair pokes him in the eye to escape and hits a quick vertical suplex with no effect at all. Ric bails to the floor to think again before walking into a headlock. Flair goes to the eyes again and ducks the Russian Sickle, sending Nikita out to the floor, injuring his knee in the process.

They go back inside and Flair chop blocks the knee out as Ric is in his element. There’s the Figure Four and Flair grabs the rope for good measure. Nikita turns the hold over into the ropes for the break so Flair starts chopping away in the corner. Since Koloff’s upper body looks like he’s carved out of granite, those have almost no effect whatsoever. Flair instead sends him to the floor as the match slows down a bit.

The champion throws him back inside for a belly to back suplex before just pounding away at Nikita’s bald head. All the punches seem to do though is just wake Nikita up and he whips Flair into the corner and out to the floor. Flair is sent into the post and comes up bloody as is his custom. They head back in and Nikita hits a flying shoulder tackle and, say it with me, the referee gets knocked down.

The Russian Sickle hits but there’s no referee. Flair knees Nikita in the back and a second referee comes in for a two count, only to get nailed by the Russian Sickle. Two referee bumps in one match? I think we get the point already people. The first referee comes back in but gets shoved down and that’s finally the DQ.

Rating: B-. Eh that wasn’t bad. Seriously that’s about all there is to say here. Flair did this same match hundreds of times and here it happened to be against Nikita Koloff and end in a disqualification. At the end of the day, there was no feud here and they were doing the best they could. It’s certainly a good match and not at all something you’ll be bored out of your mind watching, but it pretty much comes and goes, like a lot of stuff tonight.

Post match a bunch of guys come out but no one can keep Nikita off Flair. They brawl for a good three minutes until Flair is dragged to the back to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Well they tried. At the end of the day though there was only one match that mattered on this show and it was ended as soon as Magnum wrapped his car around that tree. There was no way they were going to change the title here, even if it was likely the right move given the circumstances. It’s not the worst show ever, but there’s nothing on here that you might want to see aside from the cage match. Check out last year’s show again instead.

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Repost: Wrestler of the Day – July 4: Dusty Rhodes

On the Fourth of July, who better than the American Dream? Today is Dusty Rhodes.

Dusty got his start in 1968 but we’ll join him in 1977 as a big star who is visiting the WWF. From MSG on December 19, 1977.

Stan Stasiak vs. Dusty Rhodes

Ok we’ve heard FOREVER about Dusty being a different kind of worker in the 70s. Let’s see if that’s legit. Stasiak was world champion for like 8 days and no one remembers it at all. His son is more famous as Meat/Shawn Stasiak in WWF. Rhodes is borderline thin here too which is odd. Dusty isn’t popular here but isn’t really hated either. He does his stupid dancing stuff to get out of a hold and then just ducks his head out of it. Well that was either brilliant or idiotic.

What is with so many people using wristlocks tonight? Stasiak is a very ugly man. Rhodes blocks the Heart Punch and starts busting out the elbows. I wonder if he ever hurt himself doing that. We hit a facelock and waste some more time. This is pretty weak to say the least.

The future fat man busts out some punches and hits, you guessed it, a chinlock. DO SOMETHING! I MEAN DO ANYTHING! Dusty drops an elbow and Stasiak is in trouble. Heart Punch misses again and Dusty pounds on the hand. If you didn’t get it the first three times they do it two more times before a pair of elbows from Dusty ends it. Can he do ANYTHING else? At least it’s over.

Rating: F+. Oh MAN this was boring. Dusty used a ton of rest holds. Yeah I’m stunned too. This never went anywhere at all and needed to be about half as long. This got 12 minutes and never was any good. Dusty is boring as all goodness and Stasiak wasn’t helping anything at all. At least it’s over though.

Another MSG match from August 28, 1978.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Billy Graham

This is a Texas Bullrope match and it’s pin or not being able to answer an 8 (yes 8) count. Jay Strongbow is referee for some reason. Graham doesn’t want to be tied up so Strongbow grabs him and ties him up anyway. Graham keeps running and Dusty keeps pulling him in. The elbow to the head puts Graham down and he tries to run again. Another elbow stuns Graham but he rakes the eyes to get a break.

Dusty gets choked by the rope but Billy misses an elbow drop. The Dream is busted open and Graham hooks his bearhug. That doesn’t last long for some reason so Billy goes up top. That’s REALLY FREAKING STUPID in a bullrope match as Dusty pulls him down to the mat. Billy is busted too and Dusty pounds away. Apparently this is the rubber match in a series. Graham comes back but Strongbow breaks it up for some reason. Dusty elbows him in the head and that’s enough for the 8 count and the win. That was a really abrupt ending.

Rating: C. This was fun while it lasted but unfortunately that wasn’t too long. There’s something cool about letting two guys beat the stuffing out of each other and that’s what happened here. I still don’t get what Strongbow had to do with this but maybe it was Graham’s next feud. Dusty never did much in the WWF but he did enough elsewhere to make up for it.

One last time at the Garden on December 17, 1979.

NWA World Title: Harley Race vs. Dusty Rhodes

Why am I not thrilled to see this? Race is champion here. Rhodes is listed as 261 pounds. That’s just hilarious. Race had the title and then Dusty beat him for it and vice versa, leading to the rubber match here. Dusty hits his elbow drop for two because it’s not the end of the match and since IT’S AN ELBOW DROP it doesn’t work here. This was back in the final days of the WWF being in the NWA so these wouldn’t happen much more often.

This is fairly basic and Vince keeps trying to tell us how great Rhodes is in the ring. On the mic yes but in the ring not so much. They fight over a suplex and this is definitely a different style than the rest of the show has been as it’s a more NWA style of slow building. Race is bleeding from the head. Race gets launched to the floor as this thankfully picks up something resembling steam.

Dusty hits a piledriver but the feet are on the ropes again. Race comes back with his standard stuff as this is pretty clearly coming to a close. Dusty makes his comeback which lasts about 8 seconds. Race drops a bunch of knees and Dusty is busted open too. His is a lot worse than Race’s though. Dusty makes his real comeback but the referee stops it because of his cut for a CHEAP finish. LOUD bull chant afterwards.

Rating: C. This was boring as all goodness for the most part but it picked up a lot near the end. The finish was clearly going to be screwy but I can live with that as this was just a token title defense. Also that means Race wins here instead of a draw or a no contest. Nothing great at all here but pretty watchable.

Here’s Dusty in Mid-South in 1983.

Dusty Rhodes vs. King Kong Bundy

This is a taped fist match in the New Orleans Superdome. Dusty gets pounded down to start as Bundy uses a wide variety of forearms to the back. Some big right hands put Bundy down and Dusty goes up top. A big shot to Bundy knocks him into the referee, drawing in Ted DiBiase to throw in a foreign object to knock Rhodes silly. The referee gets back up and Dusty Bundy answers a ten count for the win.

Rating: D. Dull match with a bad ending, especially when the match was billed as No DQ. Why bother having the referee get bumped when Ted’s cheating was legal? To be fair that’s a trope of wrestling but it doesn’t make a ton of sense. Nothing to see here either as this was really short.

It was soon off to the NWA and Dusty becoming the biggest face in the world. After challenging the winner of the main event of Starrcade 1983, Dusty would get his shot at Starrcade 1984.

NWA World Title: Dusty Rhodes vs. Ric Flair

Dusty is challenging and the winner gets $1 million. Flair is in pink and Dusty is in purple here which is a weird sight to say the least. Remember Joe Frazier is guest referee. Oh and Dusty is one half of the world tag team champions. Flair is the face here due to the hometown crowd but would be turning heel very soon. Thankfully only Dusty’s robe was purple and he has black trunks underneath. Dusty backs him into the corner to start and runs Flair over with a shoulder block. Off to a headlock by Big Dust before Flair takes him into the corner.

They trade punches and chops with Dusty taking over again with a headlock. We hear about Dusty trying pro football but not liking the team aspect of it. That’s hilarious when you think about it. Some elbows take Flair down as this has been almost all Rhodes so far. Ric goes to the eyes to escape and drops a knee to the head for two. Dusty will have none of this selling stuff though and puts on his terrible Figure Four.

Flair gets to the rope so it’s time for Dusty to lay on Flair’s leg for a bit. We’re five minutes in according to the ring announcer and Dusty puts on a top wristlock. Flair takes it into the corner as this is still going slowly. A bad press slam puts Flair down and Dusty chops away for no cover. Dusty pounds away in the corner and sends Flair into the corner for the Flair Flip. Frazier tries to break up a suplex back into the ring by Dusty but Rhodes does it anyway for a very slow two.

Flair elbows him in the face to take Dusty down, only to go up and get slammed down. Even in 1984 that didn’t work at all. The champion puts on a sleeper but since standing up is too much for Dusty, he rolls forward and sends Flair to the floor. They head to the floor for some brawling and Dusty goes into the post, busting him open. Oh man it’s a BAD one too, right above Rhodes’ eye. The referee looks at it but Flair starts pounding away at the cut, and that’s good enough for Frazier to stop the match. Seriously. In the main event of Starrcade.

Rating: D+. What a perfect way to end a terrible show. The match never got going and it doesn’t even reach thirteen minutes in total. What kind of an ending is that anyway? Here’s how you end this match if that’s what you’re going to do: have Flair either DESTROY Dusty to the point where Frazier stops it to save Dusty’s career or have Dusty blacking out from blood loss. Dusty was up and throwing punches when the match was stopped, making it look like a technicality than anything significant.

Here’s the rematch from Starrcade 1985.

NWA World Title: Dusty Rhodes vs. Ric Flair

This is the rematch from last year, but this time with a much better story. Dusty had his ankle broken by Flair and the Andersons after saving Flair from the Russians. Leading up to this, Dusty gave one of the greatest promos of all time, as he talked about how Flair and the Andersons put hard times on the American Dream. Dusty talked about how the people of the country were in hard times and he would be the man that would fight for them and stop people like Ric Flair at Starrcade. It’s arguably the best speech in wrestling and is still talked about twenty seven years later.

Flair is defending and this is the definition of a main event. Dusty is introduced at 275lbs, which is what The Rock was billed at for many years. For some reason I think they’re lying about Dusty’s weight here. Rhodes dances to start and it’s time to throw the punches. Dusty takes him down with a series of right hands and Flair bails out to the floor for a breather.

Back in and Dusty pounds away with elbows to the head and a big one to drop him down to the floor again. Back in again and Dusty puts on a hammerlock to take Flair to the mat. We’re four minutes into this match and Dusty already needs a rest hold? Why am I surprised by this in the slightest?

Flair takes it into the corner and fires off some right hands to the face followed by the knee drop for two. Dusty bails to the floor and is already limping on his bad leg. Or maybe he just wants a pudding pop. Flair tries to jump Dusty on the apron but gets caught in the back of the head by some elbows to put Flair in trouble again. Back in and Dusty goes after the leg with a leg lock on the mat for more resting.

Ric escapes with a rake to the eyes but can’t suplex Dusty. Instead it’s Rhodes taking Flair over with a suplex and it’s back to the leg lock. Back up and Flair puts on a sleeper hold but Dusty falls forward, sending Flair into the buckle to escape. Now Flair’s leg is wrapped around the post and Dusty stomps away but the champ pokes him in the eye to escape.

Back in and we get a somewhat famous moment as Dusty tries a snapmare but basically lays Flair down instead. It’s so embarrassingly bad that it’s hard to believe such a move exists. Anyway, Flair goes up top and if you’ve seen one Flair match over the years you know what’s coming: Dusty slams him down but Ric gets in a shot to the leg. The Figure Four is blocked but Flair goes back to Dusty’s bad leg.

Back up and Flair is whipped into the corner and goes up and over to the floor. Dusty stalks him like a big juicy hamburger with onions and sends Flair into the barricade. Back inside and the referee gets poked in the eye, allowing Flair to throw Dusty over the top. The referee gets his vision back and counts two off a cross body from Rhodes, followed by some right hands to the head.

Flair is busted open as is his custom so Dusty pounds away with rights and lefts. Ric backs away from the Bionic Elbow and there’s another Flair Flip in the corner, only to have Ric run the corner and dive into a punch to the ribs. Dusty goes for a kick but hits the rope and there goes the bad leg again. There’s the knee drop onto Dusty’s leg and it’s Figure Four time.

Dusty is in BIG trouble but he hangs on and screams at the referee to not stop the match. With the power of the fans Rhodes turns the hold over to escape and the big elbows crack Flair’s head open even more. A clothesline puts him down for two but the referee gets taken out on the kickout. Dusty accidentally throws Flair into the referee, knocking him out to the floor for good measure.

Now Dusty puts Flair in the Figure Four but here’s Arn Anderson. Dusty kicks him in the head with the bad leg with no pain in sight but we’re almost done so I can’t complain. Anyway Ole Anderson comes in and knees Dusty in the back to give Flair a near fall from a fresh referee. They get back up and Dusty small packages Flair for the pin and the title to blow the roof off the place.

Rating: B. This was a WAY better match that I remember it being. It’s far from a technical masterpiece or anything like that, but the match tells a good story and has the absolute correct ending. Dusty gets to fight off the men that hurt him and beats Flair in the middle of the ring as the fans wanted to see. Good stuff here.

Granted none of that mattered because the next week on television, Flair was given the title back because of the interference. This is known as the Dusty Finish, as Dusty, the booker at the time, was famous for having the match end and then change it later due to some technicality. At least it was a week later and not here though.

This led to Dusty’s feud with the Horsemen, including this match at Starrcade 1986.

TV Title: Tully Blanchard vs. Dusty Rhodes

This is a first blood match as the gimmicks continue. Tully is challenging and has JJ Dillon with him here. The referee stops JJ from putting either protective gear and Vaseline on Tully’s head. Instead Dusty elbows Dillon in the head to bust him open. That’s quite the message. Tully misses a knee in the corner to start and they circle each other a bit. Both guys go after the others’ head but no contact is actually made.

They circle each other even more until Dusty hits a headbutt to put Tully down. As expected the referee checks both guys because using a headbutt in a first blood match is a stupid idea. Rhodes pounds at the ribs in the corner before hitting the Bionic Elbow to the head. Dusty lays down on the leg, because leaving your head exposed like that could NEVER backfire on him at all. Blanchard rolls to the floor and we stall again.

Back in and Tully drops an elbow and rakes at Dusty’s head only to have Rhodes come back and drop a knee. The referee goes down (AGAIN) and JJ throws in his signature shoe. Rhodes throws it away and elbows Tully in the head. A bunch of right hands bust open Blanchard’s head but there’s no referee. Tully is knocked down, allowing JJ to rub Vaseline on the cut to stop the bleeding. He also hands Dusty a roll of coins to knock Dusty out cold and bust him open for the title.

Rating: D-. This was about seven minutes of stalling and covering heads before the overdone ending. The referee bumps are getting really old at this point as there have been what, five or six so far on this show? Dusty continues to not have much in the ring aside from one good match with Flair last year. This was very little to see due to all of the stalling.

What better way to cap off the feud than the ultimate team match? From July 4, 1987, in the first time ever.

Dusty Rhodes/Road Warriors/Nikita Koloff/Paul Ellering vs. Four Horsemen/JJ Dillon

The Horsemen in this case are Flair, Anderson, Blanchard, Luger and JJ Dillon. Flair’s music is epic as they crank the music WAY up. This is the Atlanta main event and it’s the debut of WarGames. For those of you uninitiated, WarGames is the mother of all gimmick matches. You have two teams of five and each team sends in a member. Those two fight for five minutes and there’s a coin toss.

The winning team gets to send in the third man to have a 2-1 advantage. That lasts two minutes and then the team that lost the toss gets to send in its second man to tie it at 2-2. That lasts two minutes then the team that won the toss sends in its third man. You alternate like that every two minutes until it’s 5-5 and then it’s first submission. No pins allowed.

Arn and Dusty start us off and remember this can’t end until all ten are in. There are two rings side by side with one huge cage over them if I didn’t mention that. They feel each other out a lot as they’re not entirely sure what to do here. Dusty walks on the second rope and then swings across the top of the cage to kick him in the ribs. Now they’re going and Dusty pounds away including a low blow which is perfectly legal.

There’s a DDT by Dusty and the crowd is red hot. Arn is cut open about two and a half minutes in so Dusty rakes it across the cage wall. Everyone hates everyone on the other team so this is a huge blood feud all around. Dusty sends him into the cage and has dominated the entire time. After a quick comeback by Arn Dusty gets his bad Figure Four on and then lets go of it because….well just because I guess.

The Horsemen win the toss (the faces literally never won the thing) and it’s Tully in next. The Horsemen beat him down but Dusty is booking so he knocks them both down with elbows. And scratch that as Tully gets in a knee shot and the double teaming begins. Tully puts on a Figure Four as they work over the knee. The clock seems to skip ahead a bit (no sign of clipping though) and Animal comes in to tie it up.

He starts launching Horsemen everywhere and sets Tully up for a slingshot which he rams three straight times. Shoulder block takes Tully down and Dusty destroys Anderson. I think Blanchard is busted and he gets double teamed a bit. Anderson looks dead. Animal is like screw that and rams him into the cage a few times. Flair is in to make it 3-2 and chops at Animal which doesn’t work. The number catch up with him as Anderson is back up quickly.

Sorry for a lot of play by play here but it’s the only thing you can do in matches like this one. Animal is busted. Dusty tries to fight back but he’s almost on his own. The fans are so loud that you can’t hear Tony and Jim. Dusty is bleeding and here comes Nikita. Flair grabs him as he comes in but the power of RUSSIA breaks up the Horsemen. The double ring thing here is very nice as they have room to move around. Animal sends Flair into the cage and he’s bleeding now. Dusty is gushing blood.

Nikita and Dusty work on the knee of Anderson but Nikita goes to get Tully stuck between the two rings and hits him between the ropes in a slingshot thing. Flair begs off Nikita and that doesn’t end well for the champ. A double dropkick puts Anderson down and here’s Lex. This is literally non-stop. Powerslam plants Koloff and Lex is dominating. There’s a spike piledriver to Nikita and then a second one just to kill him deader than dead. The Horsemen are in control but they’re starting to fall from exhaustion and blood loss.

Here’s Hawk and the fans erupt all over again. He destroys everything in sight and if you’re not bleeding already you will be now. Nikita’s neck is messed up and he can barely stand. JR is in Heaven with this much carnage. Flair gets a Figure Four on Dusty but it doesn’t count yet. The Horsemen only have JJ Dillon left and he’s a manger. He goes after Hawk and that’s just dumb.

Flair saves JJ’s life and they’re getting tired. Flair is bleeding a ton as if you expected anything else. JJ is taking a beating but Animal is getting triple teamed. Here’s Ellering to get us all tied up and now the match can end. Ellering has an LOD spiked pad on his arm. Dillon is bleeding BAD so Ellering JAMS THE SPIKE INTO HIS EYE. The LOD circles in on Dillon as the rest of the team runs interference. The Warriors spear his head into the cage and load up the Doomsday Device. JJ lands on his shoulder, legitimately hurting it. With Animal running interference, Hawk beats him half to death until he gives up to finally end this.

Rating: A+. This runs 26 minutes and there is literally no stopping in the whole thing. There isn’t some period where they chill because they’ve done enough. This is about brutality and violence and it works very well. There’s a ton of blood and JJ looks like he fell out of a building (for some reason in wrestling attire) at the end of it. It’s well worth seeing and still works today. Great match.

Dusty was booker around this time and came up with a concept to put himself over: a battle royal…..inside a steel cage. Yeah. From Bunkhouse Stampede.

Bunkhouse Stampede

Dusty Rhodes, Tully Blanchard, Ivan Koloff, The Warlord (wearing a Lifeguard shirt for no apparent reason), Arn Anderson, Lex Luger, The Barbarian, Animal.

Dusty gets a big entrance of course with all his accomplishments listed. Did I mention he was booking at the time? Seriously, ONLY DUSTY had anything listed about him, including the match he won to qualify here, his world title reigns, his US Title reigns, and his TV Title reigns. No one else got anything but their normal entrances. This could get bad fast. All eight are in there at once. There aren’t any weapons like promised or anything.

Remember, it’s a battle royal in a cage where you have to throw them over the ropes or through the door. My goodness this is idiotic. Apparently it’s unheard of for someone to win three straight Bunkhouse Stampedes. That could be because this is THE THIRD ONE! Wow Dusty lowered some IQs. Everyone is in some screwed up street clothes of some kind and this is just idiotic.

Apparently the referee has to determine if a guy goes over the cage or through the door, since that’s overly complicated I guess. Wow shoving people OVER A CAGE looks stupid. See, when it was a regular battle royal, IT MADE SENSE. Blanchard and Anderson work together of course. Barbarian, Warlord and Koloff are in the same stable mind you so they’ll likely work together. Koloff and Dusty climb the cage due to idiocy.

I’m watching people try to throw PEOPLE over a cage. Does that sound stupid to you or is it just me? How hard would it be to throw someone that is fighting back over a cage wall? Because to me, IT SOUNDS IMPOSSIBLE. Also, there are a lot of people walking around on the top ropes which is just freaking stupid too. No one is out or anything yet.

Arn saves himself from being thrown out the door as I realize how much this sounds like a really bad comedy sketch. Koloff is bleeding. Winner gets half a millon dollars. Not sure if I said that or not but I don’t want to stop the tape long enough to go back and read it. I feel sorry for Ross and Caudle trying to make this sound interesting or intense or whatever it’s supposed to be.

Luger and Dusty just go off as we’re supposed to believe that a guy that is built like Dusty is supposed to be in the same kind of condition as a stallion like Luger. Right. Oh yeah, and keep in mind this whole cowboy southern thing is in NEW YORK CITY. They continue to try to make this sound good and it’s just failing. Wow this was ten days before I was born and 12 before Hogan lost the world title to Andre. Holy goodness that’s weird to think about.

Still no one out and we’re almost 15 minutes into this. It’s mainly just people in jeans hitting people with belts and boots. Yeah it’s riveting in case you can’t tell. Dusty’s arm is bleeding from being worked over with a belt. Make this stop please. Animal tries to shove Anderson over the top. I want to break this match.

Koloff, like an idiot, although at this time he’s one of two former world champions in there somehow, climbs over the cage to get away from Animal and gets knocked out to take us down to seven. Oh sweet mercy kill me now. So let’s just keep the camera on Koloff FOREVER as we see the EPIC DRAMA of him standing up. Animal and Warlord fight to the door and Warlord gets knocked to the door. Animal gets kicked in the head by Barbarian and it knocks both guys out in a stupid looking spot.

We have Dusty, Luger, Anderson, Blanchard and Barbarian left. Blanchard gets put in the Rack which at least hurts him. Some fan shouts about how freaking gay this is. Thanks for that. Luger takes a Gourdbuster and the Horsemen try to throw him out. Since Luger didn’t have any gourds on him though, he was fine and stays in.

Anderson, Luger and Blanchard fight by the door and they all go out after like three minutes of fighting. Arn at one point stood on the third step and choked Luger. Yeah he deserved to lose. So we have Barbarian vs. Dusty. Any bets on who wins here? Barbarian gets some brass knuckles and pops Dusty with them. Barbarian hits like three of his top rope headbutt finishers but Dusty fights back baby!

They climb to the top rope for the epic move known as the OH DANG THIS MATCH MAKES NO SENSE SO LET’S CLIMB UP SO WE CAN HAVE A REASON TO GET THROWN OVER THE CAGE! Yep, Dusty wins by hitting the elbow to the head and we’re done. Earl Hebner is the referee here but would be in WWF in 12 days for the famous twin angle. Dusty gets a big bronze cowboy boot. Give me a FREAKING BREAK!

We hear about Dusty was considering retiring before this but came back “for the people.” So he was about to leave and came back for the people. So apparently by coming back for the people, he just had to come up with a PPV for himself and put himself over in it. Sure why not.

Rating: F. There was a cage match with a battle royal going on. This was a MASSIVE love letter from Dusty to Dusty. This was all about getting him even FURTHER over and making things look even stupider. Somehow Dusty was the wildcard and the favorite at the same time. He’s US Champion already but was going to retire. I give up. Just a joke of a main event and a show.

Dusty would team up with Sting to challenge for the Tag Team Titles at Clash of the Champions II.

World Tag Team Titles: Sting/Dusty Rhodes vs. Arn Anderson/Tully Blanchard

Sting and Rhodes are challenging of course and Dusty is nearing the end of his run with the promotion. Sting starts with Anderson and counters the wristlock in the same way he did to Flair at the first Clash. Arn bails to the floor for a breather and the fans are WAY into Sting here. Back in and Anderson throws Sting to the floor, only to miss a charge into the post. Sting wraps Arn’s arm around the post and cranks on it back inside for good measure.

The champions tag to bring in Tully but Sting slams him down twice in a row and tags in Dusty to an even bigger ovation from the crowd. Rhodes cleans house with punches to the face and Blanchard is in trouble in the corner. A big elbow to the head puts him down and Dusty puts on his pretty bad looking Figure Four. The hold is short lived though as a JJ Dillon distraction lets Anderson make the save and send Dusty to the floor.

Sting immediately comes over for the save and Dusty gets back inside, only to take a beating from Tully. Rhodes scores with a shoulder block and a dropkick without much air under it. Back to Sting to take over with a Stinger Splash to Blanchard but Anderson breaks up the Deathlock attempt. The Horsemen drop Sting onto the barricade to stop his momentum and Anderson drives an elbow into his back for two.

A middle rope splash hits Sting’s knees but more Horsemen double teaming stops the hot tag to Rhodes. Tully can’t get a sunset flip but Arn clotheslines Sting down to the mat for two. Blanchard sends Sting back to the floor and Anderson gets in a quick DDT on the concrete to knock Sting out cold. Dillon throws Sting back in but the referee is with Dusty, allowing Sting to kick out at two.

A backslide gets the same on Arn but he’s able to tag out while still being counted. It’s amazing how efficient the Horsemen were at teaming and that’s a great example of their skill. Sting catches Tully in a hot shot and now Dusty comes in off the tag. The fans suddenly believe the championships are in trouble and everything breaks down. The referee gets bumped and Barry Windham and Ric Flair run in for the disqualification.

Rating: D+. The fans helped this a lot but it wasn’t a great match from a technical standpoint. There was a good chance of a title change here given what happened at the previous Clash, which sets a good precedent for future shows in this series. It’s also a good sign that Sting is in another main event here and is being treated like a big deal and threats to titles.

After being fired for going insane as booker, Dusty would start his own promotion in Florida. Here’s the main event of their Homecoming show on March 11, 1989.

PWF World Title: Big Steel Man vs. Dusty Rhodes

Big Steel Man is Tugboat/Typhoon/Shockmaster. Dusty comes out to Old Time Rock And Roll. Well at least he has good taste. Oh apparently Page is the manager of Big Steel Man. That sounds like something a 4 year old would come up with. Steel Man shoves Dusty around a lot to start. Dusty comes back with an elbow. That sequence took over a minute somehow. Dusty jumps (yes, jumps) into a bearhug two minutes into the match. This match is really looking down in a hurry.

Dusty elbows out of it and goes to the floor, only to have his shoulder rammed into the post. Back inside Steel Man works over the arm with a wristlock. The guy is 370lbs and he’s using a move that a cruiserweight could use. That’s not a compliment in this case. The arm goes into the buckle and Big Steel drops four legdrops in a row followed by a missed top rope splash. Dusty rolls over quickly and gets the pin and the title out of nowhere.

Rating: F. OH COME ON! After this horrible show, the big star’s match for the world title isn’t even eight minutes long? There was no build at all and the ending didn’t do anything for the crowd, as they didn’t have a chance to get ready. Also, Dusty looks like a weak champion as all he did was move out of the way instead of hitting a move of his own. Horrible main event to a terrible show.

After that, Dusty would head to the WWF with his first major match taking place at Summerslam 1989.

Honky Tonk Man vs. Dusty Rhodes

Dusty recently stole the Boss Man’s hat and nightstick after debuting early in the summer. We start with a dance off before Dusty takes him into the corner for a clean break. Honky bails to the floor to avoid the Bionic Elbow but comes back in for Dusty to grab his arm. Instead of driving an elbow into the shoulder though, Dusty messes with Honky’s hair to really get on his nerves. An atomic drop and the Bionic Elbow put Honky down with Dusty in full control.

Ten right hands in the corner drop Honky to the mat and it’s off to Dusty’s totally lame leg lock (meaning he stands there and turns Honky’s foot) fills in some time. Honky fires off some right hands but drops down to avoid a running Dusty. Jimmy Hart trips Dusty up and Honky just lays on the mat instead of going after Rhodes as Jimmy is stalked. Honky gets Jimmy’s megaphone for a shot to Dusty’s ribs and finally takes over with a chinlock.

It’s the long form version as we’re still in the hold about two minutes later. Dusty fights up and misses an elbow so it’s back to the chinlock. Rhodes fights up again and pounds away with right hands but Honky sends him into the referee to make this match go even further. Jimmy accidentally knocks Honky silly with the guitar and Dusty drops a big elbow for the pin.

Rating: D-. Who in the world thought this deserved ten minutes should be carried into the street and shot. Between the leg lock and the WAY too long chinlock, this could have been cut in half and nothing would have been lost. Honky was fine as a jobber to the stars at this point and he would maintain that position for months to come. This was way overbooked for what it was worth, but the fans loved Dusty which is the point of the match.

Another of Dusty’s feuds was against Big Boss Man, including this match at Saturday Night’s Main Event XXIV.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Big Bossman

Dusty wants Slick thrown out but can’t get that. Bossman dominates to start with the help of Slick. Dusty gets to lay on his back for awhile so something must be working. A short fat woman at ringside yells at Slick. Dusty has gotten NOTHING in here at all. His comeback only lasts a bit as Slick gets the nightstick. Bossman yells at the lady from earlier and gets rolled up for the pin. The lady gets to dance in the ring and would become Sapphire.

Rating: D. Total domination here but Dusty got punches in and then a rollup to win the match. I hate that booking and always have. It makes Bossman look kind of weak since he managed to lose to a quick rollup like that and little of his offense did anything. This was just bad, but I’d put that on Dusty.

Then we hit the most logical feud ever: the common man vs. the Macho King. They would meet in the first mixed tag in WWF history at Wrestlemania VI.

Dusty Rhodes/Sapphire vs. Queen Sherri/Randy Savage

Savage is the King at this point. This is the first mixed tag in company history according to Fink. I don’t know if that’s true but I don’t know of another preceding it. Dusty and Sapphire are introduced at 465lbs. Jesse: “Are you telling me Dusty only weighs 200?” Dusty says cut the music because he’s got the crown jewel: Elizabeth. Savage FREAKS (I think. It’s kind of hard to tell with him) and Jesse is on one of his famous rants.

The genders have to match here so the guys start things off. Sherri tries to interfere but Sapphire makes the save. Dusty throws Sherri into Savage and we’re off to the women. Sapphire shakes her hips into Sherri and hooks an airplane spin for bad measure. Sherri tries a slam which goes as well as you would expect it to. Off to the men again with Sapphire getting in a few slaps from the apron.

The guys go to the floor but Savage runs back in for a top rope ax handle to the floor. He hits it again for good measure but Sapphire gets in the way of the third jump. Back in and Randy hits a suplex for two and drops Rhodes with a shot to the head with the scepter. Sherri hits a top rope splash for two on Dusty because the rules don’t matter I guess. Everything breaks down with Sapphire taking over on Sherri. Liz sends Sherri back inside and it’s a schoolgirl win for Sapphire on the Queen.

Rating: D. Another mess here that was there more for the spectacle than anything else. Most of this show isn’t that good all around and this was another good example. Sapphire continues to be pretty much there as a sight gag but thankfully she would be gone later on in the summer. Not much to see here for the most part.

And a singles version from Summerslam 1990.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Randy Savage

Before the match we hear a familiar laugh and cut to Ted DiBiase on the interview platform. He’s been spending the last several weeks telling Dusty that he has a price just like everyone else but Dusty has kept turning him down. Tonight, someone else had a price: Sapphire, Ted’s latest purchase. Ted’s latest gift to her is a bag of money which is hard to pass up. DiBiase brings up the most obvious point to the story: who else could afford to pay for all the gifts Sapphire has been getting?

Rhodes charges at DiBiase but Savage jumps him from behind to start the match. Back in and Savage hits a top rope ax handle for two. Dusty comes back with some elbows but his heart isn’t in this. He has to stop to chase Sherri though, allowing Savage to knock Rhodes out cold with Sherri’s loaded purse for the pin. This was nothing.

After bringing his son Dustin in at the 1991 Royal Rumble in a loss to DiBiase/Virgil, the Rhodes Family would head back to WCW. One of these matches was on January 4, 1992 at the WCW/New Japan Supershow II.

Dustin Rhodes/Dusty Rhodes vs. Masa Saito/Kim Duk

Well of course Dusty just had to grace us with his presence in a huge match like this. I mean it’s not like there’s some young guy that needed the exposure here or anything like that right? I’m sure there isn’t a guy that has never really gotten a spotlight before that could use a match on PPV in front of 60,000 people. Nah we’d rather have old fat men! Let’s get this over with.

I’ve never heard of Duk. Sweet merciful crap Dusty is a fat man. Saito is a big man but looks tough. Dusty simply doesn’t at all. Dustin and Duk start us off and we get a criss cross which Dustin controls. Ross REALLY likes the refereeing tonight for some reason. He’s complimented it in every match so far tonight.

Duk has been in two big spots so far: a head scissors and a back drop and both have looked very bad. The other guy was Dustin Rhodes who is usually very solid in the ring. I’m pretty sure I think I know who screwed up there. We hear about Saito being in the Olympic Games in 64. He refuses to tag in here, merely brushing him off. That’s rather funny.

The two fat men come in with Dusty gettinga nice round of applause. We fight to the ramp with Dusty firmly in control. Saito drops to his knees in front of Dusty. If he wants to blow him he’s going to have a lot of gut to hold up. Ross says Dusty has been inactive for a year or so. That’s very funny, as if Dusty has been active in his life.

Ross explains the difference between ring attendants and managers which is fairly interesting. Is there ANY reason why we have Dusty working the majority of the match here? Did anyone thought that was the right idea? We hit the nerve hold so we talk about the language barriers between Duk, a Korean and Saito, who is Japanese.

Saito misses a running kick and drills Duk to bring in Dustin again. Duk hits a Piledriver on Dustin for two. Back to Dusty vs. Saito which still isn’t incredibly interesting. Saito is good though so we have that to fall back on I guess. Thankfully Dusty isn’t in there long and Dustin walks into a Saito Suplex which is of course his namesake. It’s a modified belly to back.

They ram heads and both guys are down. Duk comes in but since he isn’t incredibly talented Dustin just beats the tar out of him, getting a dropkick for two and then after a few more seconds the bulldog (I can’t stand that move) ends this. The total lack of a reaction is still weird to me.

Rating: D+. Weakest match so far. Dusty and Duk weren’t worth much at all here. Ross saying he was funky like a monkey in total deadpan is hilarious for some reason. This was pretty bad but it could have been much worse. It got nearly 15 minutes and for some reason Dusty was in there more than his son. Odd.

Dusty would mostly be retired at this point but would come out of retirement to help his son in his war with the Stud Stable, including in WarGames at Fall Brawl 1994.

War Games: Stud Stable vs. Team Rhodes

Stud Stable: Robert Parker, Bunkhouse Buck, Terry Funk, Arn Anderson
Team Rhodes: Dustin Rhodes, Dusty Rhodes, Nasty Boys

So yeah, Dusty Rhodes is in the main event as are the Nasty Boys and Bunkhouse Buck and a manager. We can’t have Sting or Vader or someone interesting in there. Arn Anderson is the biggest star at the current time in there. For those of you that haven’t ever seen one of these, here are the rules. We start with one guy from each team and they fight for five minutes.

Keep in mind that it’s two rings and one cage over the whole thing mind you. After the five minutes are up, we have a coin toss which the heels literally never lost. Whoever wins (the heels) send in their second man and that team has a 2-1 advantage for two minutes. After the two minutes are up, the team that lost the toss sends in its second man to make it 2-2 for two minutes.

After that two minutes, it goes to 3-2 and alternates back and forth for two minutes each until everyone is in. Then and only then can you win the match and only by submission. In other words, you’re guaranteed seventeen minutes passing by before the match can actually end. This gimmick is by far and away my all time favorite and it really is a huge deal. Thankfully Dusty has a shirt on.

When the Nasty Boys name graphic comes up we see Dustin Rhodes. Nice one guys. Oh and Dusty is team captain despite not wrestling in years. We start with Dustin and Arn, who are the only two of reasonable age with talent so that’s the best choice I guess. They actually have a cameraman in the cage. I like that. Arn does the same spot he always does of having his head put between the rings.

They start off fairly generic as most of these matches did. Dustin gets a nice jump over both sets of ropes from one ring to another. Nice spot. You can see that in reality the heels lost the coin toss as they call tails and after the referee loses the quarter that it comes up tails but the heels win. Bunkhouse Buck comes in to make it 2-1.

Good night this is boring so far. And since Dusty wouldn’t book himself anything but last to save his fat life the savior is a Nasty Boy. That just doesn’t blow my skirt up. The heels put on a double Boston Crab because that sells PPVs dang it. Jerry Sags ties it up. I can’t believe this is actually main eventing a PPV. The crowd is hot as fire which stuns me. Oh looks it’s a sleeper.

Given the four guys left it’s pretty simple who goes in next for each team. Funk tries to throw a chair in but forgets there’s a roof. Funk is in and it’s 3-2. He hits people with his boot that he removed. Funk falls down through the rings and hits the floor, which means he could just crawl out under the ring but whatever. Of course Knobbs is next to tie us up. Brian Knobbs is making the save. How in the world does this make sense?

Oh Dusty has a shirt that says Nasty Dream. Parker is the only entertaining thing here and I usually can’t stand him. I wonder what they would do to him if he didn’t go in. There are no DQs remember. He finally gets in and hurts his hand throwing a punch. Dustin has a belt from somewhere. Everyone is just waiting around for Dusty to get in and take all the glory.

It was so painfully obvious that he would be the one getting the win because his name is Dusty Rhodes and he could rival Hogan as far as ego went. Of course he can fight off all three heel wrestlers with no issue. Heenan calls him a Brahma Bull which is amusing to me. About 40 seconds after he gets in he puts a figure four that completely sucks on Parker and the Nastys drop about 30 elbows on him for the submission. How Dustin is able to fight off all three guys isn’t answered but whatever. DUSTY REIGNS! That ends the show.

Rating: D+. They managed to screw up War Games. That’s just freaking impressive. Seriously, look at these people and realize that it’s 1994. That sums up the whole issue with this. If it were 1987 this would have been fine but get with the times people. Dusty and the Nastys? REALLY? Anyone that wants to try to convince me that this wasn’t Hogan’s doing, let me know.

Other than a few matches as part of the NWO, Dusty would retire from mainstream wrestling. He would however come back in ECW to face the King of Old School Steve Corino, including this match at Living Dangerously 2000.

Steve Corino vs. Dusty Rhodes

This is a bullrope match, meaning they’re tied at the wrist by a bullrope which has a cowbell that can be used as a weapon. The match is won by pin or submission. Dusty has to elbow him down to get the rope around his wrist. A cowbell to the head had Corino in trouble and they head outside with Dusty walking him up to the stage and into the crowd. Steve is bleeding and this has been all Dusty so far.

Corino finally comes back with a cowbell shot to the head and Jack Victory comes in for some shots as well. Dusty is bleeding as well but comes back with some signature elbows to the head. They finally get back to ringside with Corino biting Dusty’s cut. Victory slides in a chair but Dusty uses the rope to pull Steve face first into the opened chair. Dusty slices at Corino’s arm with the cowbell and nails him in the head with it for good measure.

Corino wedges the chair between the top and middle rope, only to be sent face first into it, as per wrestling custom. Steve comes back with punches and the big elbow to the head but Victory throws in another cowbell. The referee, who Corino and Victory attacked recently, tapes the bell to Corino’s head so Dusty can blast it with a chair. Dusty mostly hits Steve’s head instead of the bell and the Bionic Elbow gets the pin.

Rating: D. This was a brawl that spent about half the time in the audience, but what can you expect from an overweight man in his fifties that hasn’t wrestled full time in years? I have no idea why you would have Dusty win here though as it makes Corino look weak, which is the worst thing you can do when ECW wanted to push him as a big star. This was a somewhat fun match but it just wasn’t very good.

It was back to WCW for its dying days, including this match at Greed 2001.

Dusty Rhodes/Dustin Rhodes vs. Jeff Jarrett/Ric Flair

The losers have to kiss the winners’…..yeah. Flair is in a Hawaiian shirt as we talk about burritos. Something tells me this is going to be a comedy match minus the comedy. Animal is here too. Dusty’s music is a cover/parody of his WWF music of all things. Uh…sure why not. Jarrett is fighting on his own apparently. Ok never mind no he won’t be. Animal gets thrown out before we get started.

Dustin TOWERS over his dad. Jarrett and Dustin start us off. The faces are of course dressed in cowboy stuff since that’s all they can wear. Let the crotch grabbing begin! Flair comes in and beats up Dustin for a bit as we wait for the hot tag to the guy in the mid-50s. Dusty comes in and gets a standing ovation. Yeah Flair vs. Dusty, the main event of Starrcade EIGHTY FOUR is the biggest thing of the night. That’s a horrible sign for a wrestling company.

Dusty cleans house before Dustin comes in. Shattered Dreams is blocked by a low blow. It’s called the Dust Buster here to continue making my head hurt. Jarrett goes after the knee since everyone has to use a Figure Four. And there it is. Dusty of course does nothing about it because that would be naughty. Both guys get tags after the hold is broken and Dusty cleans house.

Dusty’s big elbow gets two. Flair shouts NO but doesn’t roll out of the way or anything like that. I guess that would make too much sense or something. A pair of low blows and the heels go for a double figure four, which fails. Dustin manages to screw up a small package but pins Flair anyway. Post match Dusty drops his pants and kind of does a Stinkface but it’s awful. Can we move on please?

Rating: D-. Somehow this was better than the previous few matches. Dusty is the high spot of the show though and that’s never a good sign. It says that no one buys the young guys and would rather see the old guys from like 15 years ago. It’s the worst thing you can have and the idea is to have the old guys put the young guys over. WCW never got that but whatever. Match sucked.

Dusty would head over to TNA and face Jeff Jarrett for control of the Asylum on November 26, 2003.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Jeff Jarrett

This is for control of the Asylum, which I assume means control of the company. It’s also billed as Fans’ Revenge, meaning there are “fans” at ringside with leather straps to act as lumberjacks. Jeff is world champion but of course this is non-title. The fans come out to Hulk Hogan’s WCW theme music (American Made) which made my head snap back to the monitor.

Jarrett offers to beat up all the fans and save Dusty for last. Tenay dedicates this match to recently deceased NWA World Champion Dick Hutton, which is a name you probably won’t hear more than five times ever in modern wrestling. Dusty scores with a quick Bionic Elbow and Jeff instinctively rolls to the floor, only to run back inside to escape the straps. Now Jeff runs from another elbow attempt and takes his chances on the floor.

More strap shots send him back inside to face the Dream as the fans (the real ones, not the indy workers at ringside) are getting into this. That same sequence happens a few more times as Rhodes just stands in the corner. Jeff finally realizes he’s fighting Dusty Rhodes and punches him down with ease but Dusty starts shaking. The Flip Flop and Fly sets up the Bionic Elbow to send Jeff out for more strapping.

Dusty takes one of the straps for some shots of his own but the referee gets bumped. Jeff gets the strap and beats on Dusty but Jimmy Hart and Don Callis (managers) come in to fight. This draws out Director of Authority Erik Watts to chokeslam Jarrett…and that’s that. The DVD just goes to another history package, meaning I guess it was a no contest?

Rating: D+. This falls under the category of you know what you’re getting. Dusty was fifty eight years old and hadn’t been an active wrestler in over ten years. The match was about the lumberjacks getting in some shots on Jarrett and giving the fans something amusing to see. Dusty would stick around as an authority figure four years.

Here’s one I doubt you’ve seen before. From an elementary school in Paintsville, Kentucky at the Bluegrass Boogie Bash on December 12, 2003.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Slash

Slash is Wolfie D of PG-13. Before we get started Slash grabs a mic and insults the fans with some gay slurs. A single elbow puts Slash on the floor and one to Sinn does the same as Dusty rules the ring for a bit. Dusty works the arm and even though he’s doing very basic stuff, you can see he knows exactly what he’s doing and is working the crowd every second.

Out to the floor now as Slash takes over with some right hands. They have ropes as a barrier here so Slash chokes away with that for a bit. Back into the ring and it’s a neck crank to the Dream. That goes on for a good while and then it’s some choking with the wrist tape. Asiatic Nerve Hold goes on as we waste WAY too much time here.

Literally this hold lasts about two and a half minutes. Flip Flop and Fly puts Slash down and Sinn interferes. That of course gets them nowhere other than on their backs as Dusty moves away and they collide. Dusty rolls up Slash and it’s over. Like he wasn’t going to go over here. That’s not a criticism mind you, merely an observation.

Rating: D-. Yeah Dusty worked the crowd well and the fans were into it, but when there are five minutes in a match and one goes to them walking around and two is spent in various rest holds, that’s not much of a match. Dusty had to win here which is fine but this was pretty weak nonetheless.

Back to WWE for two legends matches. We’ll start at Survivor Series 2006.

Team Legends vs. Spirit Squad

Ric Flair, Sgt. Slaughter, Ron Simmons, Dusty Rhodes
Kenny, Johnny, Nicky, Mikey

Slaughter is replacing a cancer ridden Roddy Piper. Actually he got very lucky as he got a concussion because of a Conchairto from Edge, and on the tests the cancer was found. Arn Anderson is here with the Legends and we get the awesome Horsemen music. The only member of the Squad still around is Nicky, more famous as Dolph Ziggler. Mikey is Mike Mondo in ROH at the moment.

Simmons and Mikey start things off and guess who wins the slugout. Simmons beats up all of them but Mitch, the fifth member of the squad not in the match, interferes and gets Ron on the floor. Mitch’s distraction leads to Simmons getting counted out. Mitch gets ejected but Simmons beats him up first. Anderson gets ejected as well for no apparent reason. The Philly fans are TICKED. Nicky comes in to face Sarge and he mocks the salute. Fan: “PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE!”

Sarge beats him up with ease and it’s off to Dusty for some gyrating and elbows to the arm. It’s off to Flair and you know the Philly fans are all for that one. A chop later and it’s right back to Slaughter who hooks the Cobra Clutch, but Dusty and Kenny come in to fight, allowing Johnny to kick Sarge in the head to give Nicky a pin. Off to Dusty who hits the bionic elbow for the immediate elimination of Nicky, making it 3-2. Dusty gets caught in the corner but he gyrates it off.

The Flip Flop and Fly takes Kenny down but another elbow misses, giving Kenny a rollup (with jeans) pin. It’s Kenny/Johnny/Mikey vs. Flair now with Mikey starting first. Flair chops him into the corner but Mikey starts punching away. Ric hits a quick atomic drop and gets a rollup with feet on the ropes (now THAT is vintage Flair) for the elimination. Kenny gets in some shots but ducks his head and gets cradled for the pin, leaving Flair vs. Johnny. Less than a minute later it’s a Figure Four to give Flair the win.

Rating: C-. This was exactly what it was expected to be and that’s all it should have been. The legends were there to have a feel good nostalgia moment and get eliminated so Flair, the only one who had been active in the last three years or so, could knock out all of the Squad and give the fans a feel good moment. Also it’s only about ten minutes long so it’s not like this was anything major. It’s not a good technical match, but if that’s what you’re expecting here, you missed the point entirely. Besides, the Squad was gone literally the next night.

And one last one from the 2007 Great American Bash. As far as major promotions, this is Dusty’s last match to date.

Randy Orton vs. Dusty Rhodes

This is the pinfall version instead of the touching all the corners version, making it a bit better. I can’t complain about hearing Common Man or whatever that song is called again. Randy doesn’t really want to get tied up to the rope and I can’t say I blame him. I think the bell rang and that this is counting. The problem is there’s a bell on the rope so it’s hard to tell. Blast it there’s the real bell. I was hoping we were almost half done.

Comedy to start as Dusty takes him down with the rope around his feet. Dusty elbows him down and crotches him with the rope. They go to the floor and Dusty misses a bell shot to the head against the post. There’s a long beating on the floor and back inside we go. Orton gets in a shot to the knee and here comes the booing. Orton hooks a long chinlock to fill in most of the match. Dusty comes back with the elbows but a bell to the head gets the pin for Randy.

Rating: D-. What in the world were you expecting here? At the end of the day, Dusty is an old man and he’s against a young superstar. That being said, at least they didn’t make this idiotic by doing something like making him a heel. I mean, can you imagine how stupid you have to be to make an old man attempt to be a big threat? I mean, can you imagine being intimidated of a guy in his early 60s?

I think it’s pretty well known that Dusty wasn’t all that great in the ring, but man alive could he talk people into the building. The feud with Ric Flair was as natural of a dynamic as you could ever ask for and their Starrcade 1985 match was as good as they ever got. His ego got him in trouble a lot of the time, but when he was just talking, Dusty was one of the best ever.




Wrestler of the Day – December 27: Warlord

Here’s a one note character who played a solid role in his own right: the Warlord.

The Warlord is best known for his insane physique and was basically there as the resident power guy who looked great and didn’t need to do much else. After getting his start in 1986, here he is in his first pay per view main event at Bunkhouse Stampede.

Bunkhouse Stampede

Dusty Rhodes, Tully Blanchard, Ivan Koloff, The Warlord (wearing a Lifeguard shirt for no apparent reason), Arn Anderson, Lex Luger, The Barbarian, Animal.

Dusty gets a big entrance of course with all his accomplishments listed. Did I mention he was booking at the time? Seriously, ONLY DUSTY had anything listed about him, including the match he won to qualify here, his world title reigns, his US Title reigns, and his TV Title reigns. No one else got anything but their normal entrances. This could get bad fast. All eight are in there at once. There aren’t any weapons like promised or anything.

Remember, it’s a battle royal in a cage where you have to throw them over the ropes or through the door. My goodness this is idiotic. Apparently it’s unheard of for someone to win three straight Bunkhouse Stampedes. That could be because this is THE THIRD ONE! Wow Dusty lowered some IQs. Everyone is in some screwed up street clothes of some kind and this is just idiotic.

Apparently the referee has to determine if a guy goes over the cage or through the door, since that’s overly complicated I guess. Wow shoving people OVER A CAGE looks stupid. See, when it was a regular battle royal, IT MADE SENSE. Blanchard and Anderson work together of course. Barbarian, Warlord and Koloff are in the same stable mind you so they’ll likely work together. Koloff and Dusty climb the cage due to idiocy.

I’m watching people try to throw PEOPLE over a cage. Does that sound stupid to you or is it just me? How hard would it be to throw someone that is fighting back over a cage wall? Because to me, IT SOUNDS IMPOSSIBLE. Also, there are a lot of people walking around on the top ropes which is just freaking stupid too. No one is out or anything yet.

Arn saves himself from being thrown out the door as I realize how much this sounds like a really bad comedy sketch. Koloff is bleeding. Winner gets half a millon dollars. Not sure if I said that or not but I don’t want to stop the tape long enough to go back and read it. I feel sorry for Ross and Caudle trying to make this sound interesting or intense or whatever it’s supposed to be.

Luger and Dusty just go off as we’re supposed to believe that a guy that is built like Dusty is supposed to be in the same kind of condition as a stallion like Luger. Right. Oh yeah, and keep in mind this whole cowboy southern thing is in NEW YORK CITY. They continue to try to make this sound good and it’s just failing. Wow this was ten days before I was born and 12 before Hogan lost the world title to Andre. Hokey smoke that’s weird to think about.

Still no one out and we’re almost 15 minutes into this. It’s mainly just people in jeans hitting people with belts and boots. Yeah it’s riveting in case you can’t tell. Dusty’s arm is bleeding from being worked over with a belt. Make this stop please. Animal tries to shove Anderson over the top. I want to break this match.

Koloff, like an idiot, although at this time he’s one of two former world champions in there somehow, climbs over the cage to get away from Animal and gets knocked out to take us down to seven. Oh sweet mercy kill me now. So let’s just keep the camera on Koloff FOREVER as we see the EPIC DRAMA of him standing up. Animal and Warlord fight to the door and Warlord gets knocked to the door. Animal gets kicked in the head by Barbarian and it knocks both guys out in a stupid looking spot.

We have Dusty, Luger, Anderson, Blanchard and Barbarian left. Blanchard gets put in the Rack which at least hurts him. Some fan shouts about how gay this is. Thanks for that. Luger takes a Gourdbuster and the Horsemen try to throw him out. Since Luger didn’t have any gourds on him though, he was fine and stays in.

Anderson, Luger and Blanchard fight by the door and they all go out after like three minutes of fighting. Arn at one point stood on the third step and choked Luger. Yeah he deserved to lose. So we have Barbarian vs. Dusty. Any bets on who wins here? Barbarian gets some brass knuckles and pops Dusty with them. Barbarian hits like three of his top rope headbutt finishers but Dusty fights back baby!

They climb to the top rope for the epic move known as the OH DANG THIS MATCH MAKES NO SENSE SO LET’S CLIMB UP SO WE CAN HAVE A REASON TO GET THROWN OVER THE CAGE! Yep, Dusty wins by hitting the elbow to the head and we’re done. Earl Hebner is the referee here but would be in WWF in 12 days for the famous twin angle. Dusty gets a big bronze cowboy boot. Give me a FREAKING BREAK!

We hear about Dusty was considering retiring before this but came back “for the people.” So he was about to leave and came back for the people. So apparently by coming back for the people, he just had to come up with a PPV for himself and put himself over in it. Sure why not.

Rating: F. There was a cage match with a battle royal going on. This was a MASSIVE love letter from Dusty to Dusty. This was all about getting him even FURTHER over and making things look even stupider. Somehow Dusty was the wildcard and the favorite at the same time. He’s US Champion already but was going to retire. I give up. Just a joke of a main event and a show.

Off to the first Clash of the Champions about two and a half months later, with Warlord part of the Powers of Pain with the Barbarian. Their first feud was with the Road Warriors, which produced almost no good matches but some solid brawls.

Road Warriors/Dusty Rhodes vs. Powers of Pain/Ivan Koloff

Koloff and the Powers of Pain are the Six Man Tag Team Champions but the titles aren’t on the line here. This is a barbed wire street fight. Animal (teaming with his regular partner Hawk and Dusty) had his face injured by the Powers (Warlord and Barbarian) and Koloff while doing a weightlifting demonstration so tonight is about revenge. The barbed wire is around the ropes and while it’s not the at the level you might expect today, this was a BIG deal back in 1988.

The heels finally crawl under the ropes but Animal chases Warlord out to the floor to send him into the post. Most of the guys stay clear of the barbed wire and fight in the middle of the ring. Ivan and Dusty send each other into the wire and draw blood but Dusty comes back with right hands to Warlord and a big DDT to Barbarian. Hawk comes off the top with a right hand that mostly misses Warlord before Dusty kicks Barbarian to the floor. Animal powerslams Warlord and Barbarian’s top rope headbutt hits his partner by mistake, giving Animal the pin and revenge.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t much to see but the barbed wire was a nice touch, even though it wasn’t used all that much. It probably is better that they kept this match short and energetic as none of the six guys were known for their stamina. The Powers of Pain would jump to the WWF less than two months later so this was the blowoff to the feud.

The Powers of Pain were off to the WWF soon after this with one of the first matches taking place at Wrestlefest 1988 on July 31.

Power of Pain vs. Bolsheviks

Seriously we don’t skip this? The Powers of Pain came in as faces but were well on the way to being heels as they and Demolition would do the double switch at Survivor Series. The Powers of Pain have the worst music I can remember in a long time for a team like them. The faces, which feels weird to use to describe the POP, clear the ring very quickly.

Volkoff and Barbarian start us off. Was there ever a time from the early 80s to the late 90s where Barbarian wasn’t employed by one of the big two? He gets a sweet powerslam on Zhukov where he jumps in the air and gets extra momentum. To say this match is slow and plodding is a huge understatement. It’s all power stuff which isn’t something you want to see for a long time.

Warlord gets blasted in the back off the top by Zhukov and STILL manages to win a test of strength. Now THAT is how you no sell something. Barbarian gets beaten down as something more interesting happens to the right of the ring as you see everyone get up to look at it. No clue what it was but I’d rather watch it instead. The stadium is starting to get dark now and after a 30 second comeback which is a stretch also, a powerslam and top rope headbutt on Boris ends it.

Rating: D. I know I’ve been saying that a lot but dang this was boring. They just kind of beat on each other for a bit and then did the finish. These four just didn’t flow well together at all. For the life of me I have no idea why the company thought the POP were a good choice as faces but they eventually got it and switched them and Demolition. Getting there was a long wait though.

Same idea, first Summerslam.

Powers of Pain vs. Bolsheviks

The Powers (Barbarian and Warlord) are still faces here and have the Baron (Von Raschke) with them. Just like in the previous two matches the brawl is on as soon as the good guys hit the ring. The Powers double clothesline Boris Zhukov as Volkoff tries to sneak in for a cheap shot. Barbarian easily catches him coming in and sends him flying until we get down to Barbarian vs. Boris to start things off.

Boris puts his head down and…..something happens (it looked like a choke but it’s not really clear) before it’s off to Warlord for a gutwrench suplex on Zhukov. Both Russians double team Warlord but they can’t even get him down to his knees. Nikolai chokes away before Boris puts on a chinlock. The Russians have a double backdrop broken up and it’s off to Barbarian again. Everything breaks down and it’s a double shoulder followed by a swan dive to Boris for the pin.

Rating: D. Another lame match here but the Powers looked decent. The Baron would be gone in a few weeks as the company wasn’t pleased that a dark character was getting cheered, so they turned Demolition and their evil S&M looking gear face instead. Also did the Russians ever actually win a major match?

Let’s get some better opponents on February 3, 1989 at the Main Event II taping.

Tag Titles: Powers of Pain vs. Demolition

This is from the Main Event II. This was a live event but only the last 2 matches or so (Mega Powers EXPLODE) were shown. The other important thing about this show is that it was aired on February 3, 1989, or my first birthday. Demolition are the champions here and this is part of the feud that spawned out of the double turn at Survivor Series 1988. Axe vs. Warlord to start us off and the champs take over.

They switch off and Smash pounds him down with ease. I could watch Demolition do their pounding people down thing all day. We hear about the handicap match at Mania as Axe is sent to the floor after missing a charge into the corner. There’s a neck crank which is a required move in a power match. A chop sends Axe to the floor. Warlord lowers his head so that Axe can get a forearm in. Well that was nice of him.

Hot tag brings in Smash who hammers away on both guys. He always was good at getting fired up in there. A hot shot gets two on Warlord and everything breaks down. I think I know where this is going. The Powers hit more or less a top rope Hart Attack for two. Fuji gets up on the apron but Axe grabs the cane. It’s not a DQ for some reason but Fuji’s salt throw is good for the double DQ.

Rating: D+. I’ve heard that ending commentary before, I’m sure of it. I must have rented this tape before or watched it and forgotten about it. Either way, this wasn’t bad but it’s your standard house show tag match with these two. Demolition would hold the titles about another 8 months, giving them by far and away the longest tag title reign in company history.

The feud continued at Wrestlemania V.

Tag Titles: Demolition vs. Powers of Pain/Mr. Fuji

Demolition is defending and this is a handicap match. Warlord and Ax get things going with Ax pounding him down quickly. Smash comes in for a double beatdown and it’s off to a neck crank. Back to Ax for the same move and he yells at Fuji a bit. The Demolition beatdown ensues but Warlord powers Ax over to the corner for a tag to Barbarian. He shoves Smash into the corner and is immediately clotheslined down by a fresh Ax. The crowd is dead here.

Barbie gets double teamed by the champions and Ax hooks a neck crank. Back to Smash who gets chopped down before it’s back to Warlord. The advantage lasts for all of three seconds before the Powers finally get some successful cheating going on. Off to Fuji for the first time for some old man offense that is far better than Heenan or Hart at least. Barbarian comes in again and the yet to be named Kick of Fear puts Ax down again for no cover.

The match continues to stay in second gear at best with both teams barely moving at all. Fuji tries the flashiest move of the match by going up top, only to miss Ax. Gorilla: “He hasn’t wrestled in years, just like us.” Jesse: “Us? For Fuji and I it’s been years. For you many years.” Barbarian gets clotheslined down again and it’s off to Smash as everything breaks down. Fuji loads up his salt but hits Warlord by mistake. The Demolition Decapitator is enough to end Fuji and retain the titles.

Rating: D. I’m a fan of Demolition but this was a REALLY weak performance by both teams. The Powers would split soon after this which was the best idea for both guys as they were never going to break through the ceiling with Demolition on top. The title reign would continue to go on for another two months or so, reaching at nearly a year and a half.

Let’s switch things up a bit with this match from October 8, 1989.

Bushwackers vs. Bolsheviks

The Bushwackers jump the Russians to start and it’s a big brawl. After about a minute and a half of brawling we finally get down to Luke vs. Boris. This is more along the lines of a Sheepherders’ match than the traditional stuff you would see from these guys. The vast majority of the commentary is talking about how odd the Bushwackers are which is rather true.

Trongard can’t figure out who is who here. Basically the Russians can’t get anything going at all. It’s another big brawl as the Bushwackers bite legs. Luke gets in trouble though and the Russians take over for the first time. Volkoff is called the Russian Bear in blatant gimmick infringement by Hayes.

This isn’t going anywhere at all as we’re just waiting on the down under comeback to end it. The Russians here are straight up jobbers which says a lot. Somehow Trongard still can’t tell the Bushwackers apart. They look alike but it’s not like they’re identical. Butch comes in for the save when Luke is double teamed but accidently hits Luke. Luke naturally goes after Butch because that’s just what you do.

Hot tag with no heat at all on it brings in Butch who the announcers call Luke. Everything breaks down again of course and we get the dreaded heel miscommunication to put Volkoff on the floor. The Battering Ram takes down Zhukov, followed by the double stomach breaker and we begin the long awesomeness of the Bushwackers’ undefeated streak! Yeah I’m just trying to fill in space here. Trongard says the Bolsheviks are former tag champions which isn’t true. He was rather irritating on commentary for stupid things like that.

Rating: D+. This was a glorified comedy match but for a debut it was ok. The fans seemed to be into them for the most part so it’s hard to complain about them for the most part. This wasn’t horrible but considering this was more or less the peak of the Bushwackers’ abilities by this point, this wasn’t much at all. Not horrible though.

The Powers of Pain were in a major match at the 1989 Survivor Series.

Hulkamaniacs vs. Million Dollar Team

Hulk Hogan, Demolition, Jake Roberts

Ted DiBiase, Zeus, Powers of Pain

My goodness that’s an amazing face team. Ok, so now I get to explain Zeus. A month or two ago, WWE released No Holds Barred, a movie Hogan made in the late 80s, on DVD. The villain in the movie is named Zeus and you may notice he’s here. Zeus is played by an actor (not a wrestler mind you) named Tom Lister and the idea is that he’s living his character and is coming to beat Hogan up “in real life” because he lost in the movie. This would be like the guy who played Goldfinger trying to get revenge on Sean Connery. To make things even better, this was originally going to be the main event of Wrestlemania 6.

I’m sure you can see the problems mounting up already, with the main one being that Zeus doesn’t know how to wrestle. Other than that, there’s the idea that the movie barely broke even so a lot of people didn’t get the idea of the story. A positive twist to this is that a lot of people didn’t get the idea of the story, which probably kept the company from being laughed at more than they already were. Zeus wrestled like four matches ever, most of which were short or tag matches so he wasn’t in the ring long. WCW, the geniuses that they are, brought him back seven years later and put him in the main event of another PPV.

Anyway back to the match. The Million Dollar Team won’t let them get inside until Jake fires in the snake to chase them all away. Hogan and Demolition are the champions that you would expect them to be at this point. Zeus wants to fight Hogan one on one but their respective partners hold them both back. Jake starts with Zeus but the actor wants Hogan. They stare each other down and Hogan bounces off Zeus. Hogan pounds away but nothing hurts Zeus at all.

Instead Hulk finds the one weak spot on Zeus by raking the eyes. He slams Zeus down and amazingly enough, IT DOESN’T REALLY DO MUCH. Barbarian hits Hogan in the back of the head and Zeus twists Hogan’s neck around. He starts choking away and it’s a DQ for Zeus who is only pulled off by DiBiase and the promise of money. Just to clarify, we’re giving the Hulkamaniacs, an 80s dream team, a man advantage. Also why would DiBiase get Zeus off Hogan? Wouldn’t Hogan’s pain and agony make DiBiase happy?

It’s DiBiase vs. Hogan now and Hulk is in big trouble. DiBiase hammers away in the corner but Hulk gets a boot up in the corner and there’s the tag to Jake. A clothesline puts DiBiase on the floor and it’s off to Ax who demolishes DiBiase with ease. Smash comes in and they both pound Ted down. Back to Hogan who triple teams DiBiase along with Demolition. Back to Ax with a clothesline but DiBiase elbows him down out of desperation.

Off to Warlord as these two teams are still feuding even a year later. Come to think of it there wasn’t much else in between for those guys either. Dang did the division fall that fast in just a year? A shoulder breaker puts Ax down but Barbarian misses a middle rope elbow. Off to Warlord again but he gets clotheslined down. Fuji trips Ax up and a basic elbow drop is enough to tie the score.

It’s Smash vs. Warlord now but it’s quickly off to Hogan. Hulk softens him up to bring in Jake, which Jesse calls a mismatch. That’s likely based on power but I’m pretty sure Jake is taller than Warlord. Off to Smash but Warlord pokes him in the eye to take over. Back to Barbarian whose big boot is caught but Smash misses the elbow. DiBiase comes back in with those falling punches of his which get two.

It’s chinlock time with a knee in Smash’s back. DiBiase misses a middle rope back elbow of all things but Smash won’t tag for some reason. Barbarian makes a blind tag so the hot shot Smash hits on DiBiase doesn’t count and Barbarian takes his head off with a top rope clothesline for the pin. Jake comes in next but he can’t DDT Barbarian. Barbie whips Jake into the corner with authority although I’m not sure who’s authority it was.

Back to Warlord as things slow down a lot due to exhaustion. Jake dives for a tag but DiBiase slaps Hogan to draw him in instead. DiBiase piledrives Jake but Roberts gets a foot on the ropes to Jesse’s annoyance. Barbarian misses a headbutt and there’s the hot tag to Barbarian. He cleans house and gets two on Barbarian off a big boot. A suplex gets the same and my goodness how rare is it to see Hogan get a two count? Hogan fights off both Powers of Pain but they catch him in a spike piledriver which is good for a DQ for both of them, making it Hogan/Roberts vs. DiBiase.

Dibiase drops knees on Hogan before slapping on the Million Dollar Dream. That eventually gets two arm drops and Jake makes the save. That’s actually a nice touch as it makes the hold look stronger by needing a save instead of Hogan saving himself. Hogan finally breaks the hold and punches a jumping DiBiase. Hot tag brings in the Snake who cleans house. Jake drives in knees on DiBiase’s head as Hogan is dying in the corner.

Here’s Virgil to interfere and take the DDT. DiBiase drops a fist on Jake and puts his feet on the ropes to steal the pin. Ted pounds on Hogan who is still reeling from the long Million Dollar Dream. I’ll give him credit as that’s some great selling of a hold like that. Off to a chinlock and Hogan taps, which wouldn’t mean a thing for years. Hogan breaks the hold but they clothesline each other. DiBiase belly to back suplexes him and it’s Hulk Up time. You know the rest and there’s the legdrop.

Rating: C. There’s one major problem with this match: the first four minutes of this match give away the ending almost immediately. How can you give Hogan, Roberts and Demolitio a man advantage that fast? I’m not saying Hogan should have lost, but the Zeus stuff could have come later in the match and worked much better. Have Zeus stand on the apron most of the match and it would have worked fine. The fans finally reacted though.

Here are some better opponents on January 15, 1990 in MSG.

The Rockers vs. Powers of Pain

At Madison Square Garden at some point during the Colossal Connection’s title reign, putting this at some point from December 13, 1989 and Wrestlemania 6. Shawn and Barbarian start us off. Jim on commentary never was someone I was into but that accent was always catchy I guess. At least Gorilla is there to help us out. Power vs. speed here of course.

Bearhug to Shawn for a bit followed by Barbarian destroying him with a clothesline. The Rockers do the slam/dropkick to the back of the partner for the cover spot for two. They hammer away on Barbarian but can’t get anything going due to his power game. Double superkick can’t get him down but a double clothesline cane. The Rockers clear the ring to a nice response.

Warlord comes in and crushes the back of Shawn with big pounding shots. SLICK spot as Warlord has Shawn up for a powerbomb and Marty gets a dropkick to his back so Shawn can snap off a rana for two. Nice move. Off to Marty who takes the powerbomb instead. No save from Shawn as you can see the seeds being planted for the heel turn a mere year and a half later.

BIG backdrop has Marty in trouble. Into the ropes again with Warlord LAUNCHING Marty into the air so high that my eyes got very big in shock. That was VERY impressive. And you can tell I mean that because I’m capitalizing words. Barbarian in now and the beating continues. The Rockers were so awesome at selling it was unreal. On the floor after a big boot, Marty takes a cane to the back from Fuji.

Somersault off a clothesline by Marty as the selling is awesome again. Marty hits Warlord a few times and it gets absolutely no reaction at all. Back to the bearhug as Marty is in big trouble. Finally Marty gets a shot off the middle rope to….do nothing at all since a few seconds later he jumps into a powerslam that looked SICK.

Second rope elbow misses as always and there’s the hot tag to Shawn after some stumbling around to find the right corner. Marty must have gotten the Columbian stuff tonight. The crowd gets way into this very quickly. Everything goes insane with a bunch of near falls off double team moves from the Rockers. Marty is whipped into Barbarian to take them both down. Fuji trips up Shawn and an elbow ends this. Wow nice way to have your profiled guys look weak.

Rating: B. Classic big man vs. little man tag match here and it worked rather well. The Rockers could crank it up with the best of them and they certainly did that here. The Powers were a good big man team that did exactly what they were supposed to do in making smaller teams like the Rockers look like big threats. Also if you ever want to see some great selling, take a look at this match with the Rockers looking incredible in that area.

The team would split soon after this and we’ll pick things up with Warlord as a singles guy at Summerslam 1990.

Warlord vs. Tito Santana

Piper makes Mexican jokes as Tito grabs a headlock. Warlord easily shoves him down and Piper suggests going for a taco. Three straight dropkicks send Warlord out to the floor for a consultation with Slick. Back in and Tito pounds away but is launched to the outside on a kickout. Warlord rams Tito’s back into the post as Piper does a horrible Slick impression. Back in and Warlord pounds on the back but Tito fires off a quick clothesline and right hands. The flying forearm hits out of nowhere but Warlord gets his foot on the ropes. Back up a few seconds later and a powerslam abruptly ends Tito.

Rating: D+. Tito was a jobber to the stars at this point and made Warlord look as good as he could have, but the match was nothing special at all. Warlord just wasn’t all that good other than having muscles on top of muscles. Tito also jobbed to Barbarian at Wrestlemania so they had an idea of what they were using him for at this time.

Then he would be in the Grand Finale Match of Survival at Survivor Series 1990.

Hulk Hogan/Tito Santana/Ultimate Warrior vs. Ted DiBiase/Visionaries

If you can’t see the ending of this coming, just go click on something else now. Oddly enough, Hogan comes out before Tito. Tito and Warlord start and a forearm ends Warlord in less than 30 seconds. To update a reference for 2012, Tito is apparently the Ronda Rousey of the WWF. Roma immediately powerslams Tito and brings in DiBiase. My goodness a 20 minute Santana vs. DiBiase match would freaking rock. Tito misses another forearm and a hot shot gets the pin for DiBiase.

Hogan comes in and beats the tar out of DiBiase for a bit before ducking his head too early. A kick to Hogan’s face slows him down and it’s off to Hercules and almost immediately Roma for a top rope forearm for two. Back to Hercules who pounds away on Hulk even more, as does DiBiase. The Powerplex hits Hogan and has basically no effect. Roma is immediately pinned by a clothesline and it’s 3-2.

Martel comes in to beat on Hogan but gets kicked in the face. Off to Warrior who fires off a bunch of kicks in the corner and backdrops Martel. Rick tries to hit him in the head and boy are you really that dumb? Hogan knocks Martel to the floor and Rick walks off for the countout. Hogan beats on DiBiase a bit and there’s the legdrop. Warrior beats Hercules with the splash about 40 seconds later to win.

Rating: D. What in the world was the point of this? I mean……am I watching a house show? These are the kind of matches you hear about at the end of shows to send the fans home happy, not to main event a PPV. It was clear that this show wasn’t needed and that something had to be done.

Warlord’s biggest singles feud was with the British Bulldog, with one of the top matches taking place at Wrestlemania VII.

Davey Boy Smith vs. Warlord

This is about whether or not Davey can break the full nelson. We start with our standard power stuff as they ram into each other a few times, only to have Bulldog knock Warlord out to the floor. A crucifix doesn’t work for Bulldog so Warlord drops some elbows for no cover. We hit the bearhug but Bulldog punches out, only to get caught in a hot shot to keep him on the mat.

A BIG belly to belly (kind of) puts Bulldog down but again Warlord won’t cover. We hit the chinlock until Bulldog fights up and hits a dropkick to send Warlord into the corner. Punches in said corner can’t drop Warlord but a cross body is finally enough to get him off his feet. Warlord counters a piledriver but Bulldog counters the counter into a sunset flip for two. Bulldog misses a charge into the corner and Warlord hooks the full nelson. It looks like all hope is lost but the fingers aren’t locked. Bulldog finally flips out of it and hooks the powerslam out of nowhere for the win.

Rating: C+. This would be filed under the category of “shocking the world” as it was actually a pretty solid match. Bulldog would get a lot better all of a sudden while Warlord would fall further down the card than he already was. This was way better than I was expecting and it turned into a pretty decent power match.

Let’s try really screwing things up now on April 24, 1991.

Warlord vs. Jim Neidhart

Same show but later in the card. Yes, people were charged money to watch this match. Someone actually booked this match too. Someone thought this was the best choice of the talent on the roster. What does that tell you about WWF in 91? Warlord is more or less Chris Masters with an evil heel gimmick and a better look. LONG feeling out sequence to start as we kill some time here.

I shudder to think how long they could give this match given how long the tape is and how few matches were listed. Anvil grabs his foot and we do nothing for a bit longer. We hit the floor and do nothing at all of note. This is painfully boring to put it nicely. We get an I Am The Walrus reference from Roddy for the very old school people in the audience tonight.

The boring levels rise up as Warlord throws on a bearhug. His arms are deformed from so many roids in him. And now it’s a chinlock because we just haven’t killed off the crowd enough yet. This doesn’t sound too bad, but keep in mind that about 20 seconds pass between each move. We’re at well over 12 minutes and I haven’t left out anything but forearm smashes from Warlord.

Anvil starts his comeback, which of course is comprised of punches, forearms and clotheslines. Vince says Cowabunga for no apparent reason but it’s TMNT time (well we are in London after all) so all is right with the world. A splash misses for Neidhart and Warlord takes over again. And then a rollup from nowhere ends it for Anvil.

Rating: F+. This was FIFTEEN MINUTES LONG. Do I need to explain why this was a bad match? Well I might as well anyway. This was nothing at all of note and was just boring as all goodness to say the least. They TOTALLY clashed and Warlord was horrible on his best day, so this was just not going to be good at all. Absolutely awful and there’s no other way to put it.

Back to a tag match at Summerslam 1991.

Ricky Steamboat/British Bulldog/Texas Tornado vs. Warlord/Power and Glory

Steamboat is just The Dragon here, complete with what looks like a lizard man costume and breathing fire. The heels get the jobber entrance and have Slick with them. Steamboat and Roma get things going as Gorilla is listing off the rest of the card. Roma slams him down and mostly misses a dropkick before posing. Paul goes to the middle rope but dives into the armdrag and Steamboat cranks on the arm even more. Ricky hits a much better dropkick to put Roma in the corner for a tag to Hercules who gets caught in some armdrags of his own.

Off to Tornado and the fans go nuts as he rams Herc’s head into the buckle. Ten right hands to the head in the corner have Hercules in even more trouble but it’s off to Warlord vs. Bulldog which was a decent power feud. Bulldog hits the suplex for two and it’s off to Steamboat for a top rope chop to the head. Warlord blocks a monkey flip though and it’s back to Roma with a suplex of his own for two. Three straight backbreakers have Steamboat in even more trouble before it’s back to Hercules for a gorilla press.

Steamboat starts fighting back but gets caught in a big hotshot to put him down. Here’s Warlord again but he dives into two feet from Steamboat, allowing for the tag off to Tornado. The Texan cleans house but makes a blind tag to Bulldog who hits a cross body. That plus the Tornado Punch to Warlord is good for two as everything breaks down. Bulldog powerslams Roma down and Steamboat adds the high cross body for the pin.

Rating: C+. Nothing wrong with this as it was a basic six man tag to fire up the crowd. Everyone looked fine and the crowd was WAY into the smark god known as Ricky Steamboat. The heels were all about to be gone from the company with only Warlord making it to 1992.

And another elimination tag at Survivor Series 1991.

Team Ric Flair vs. Team Roddy Piper

Ric Flair, Ted DiBiase, The Mountie, The Warlord

Roddy Piper, Bret Hart, Davey Boy Smith, Virgil

Roddy was Flair’s first feud in the company as not only did you know the matches would be good, but the promos would be awesome too. Bret was feuding with Mountie over the IC Title, Smith was feuding with Warlord over who was stronger and Virgil was feuding with DiBiase because who else was he going to feud with?

Flair has the REAL World Title with him here, which is mosaiced but if you know your titles, you can see a WWF Tag Team Title, which looks really weird if you’re in the arena (if you’re not familiar with what I’m talking about, the short version is Flair was NWA Champion, left the NWA, wasn’t paid back for the deposit he put down on the belt, brought it to the WWF, got sued, and couldn’t use the title in the angle they were doing anymore so they would substitute in another belt which was censored in storyline.)

Big reaction for Bret, who has finally split from Neidhart and is IC Champion as of Summerslam. DiBiase starts for his team against Piper which is a pretty awesome match. No managers are allowed at ringside this year but Sherri is there anyway. Flair sneaks in and blasts Piper in the back to give Ted an early advantage. Piper atomic drops Ted and Sherri comes in to choke him which somehow isn’t a DQ. Piper kisses her and punches DiBiase to take over.

Sherri is sent to the back and Roddy brings in Smith. The good guys work over the arm of DiBiase with Virgil of all people getting the biggest pop. After all four go in they start going around again with all four getting in another set of shots on the arm. Bret stays in but misses a knee in the corner to put himself in trouble. They trade near falls before Bret takes him right back down by the arm.

DiBiase hiptosses him down and wisely tags in Flair. Bret starts with some of his favorite moves before tagging in Davey Boy to slingshot Flair into the corner. Piper wants in but Flair stops the tag. There’s the gorilla press to Flair and the tag to Piper, drawing a BIG pop from the crowd. Piper goes nuts with punches, knocking Flair to the floor where we get a Flair Flop.

Back inside and it’s off to Warlord who Piper wants to try a test of strength against. Piper is just playing though and brings in Smith for the big power match. Smith hits some shoulder blocks but misses a charge and it’s off to Mountie. Bret tags in and Mountie immediately hits the floor. Instead here’s DiBiase who gets elbowed off the middle rope for two. Ted and Bret hit head to head and both guys are down.

Mountie is willing to get in there now but it’s back to Davey instead. Smith gorilla presses Mountie and pumps him about three times before slamming him down for no cover. Off to Flair who chops away at the Bulldog which doesn’t work at all. DiBiase and Flair try a double team but get double clotheslined instead. There’s the powerslam to Mountie but he’s not legal. Flair comes off the top with a shot to the back of Smith’s head for the pin and the elimination. Both guys were legal too.

Piper immediately charges in but Flair tags DiBiase back instead. Flair comes in to face a downed Piper but Ric is put in the Figure Four almost immediately. Off to Mountie vs. Virgil and Mountie can’t get a tag out from anyone, because everyone is afraid of Virgil. I can’t say I blame them. He might tell them about how great he is. Flair comes in and has zero luck so it’s DiBiase vs. Virgil again. Ted powerslams him down and it’s immediately back to the Warlord.

Virgil gets sent to the floor and Flair sends him into the steps, with Virgil doing an awful job of pretending to slam into them. The full nelson goes on but everything breaks down and Bret comes off the top to take out Warlord, giving the illegal Piper the pin to tie us up at 3. Piper vs. DiBiase now before Virgil is quickly tagged in. Virgil slaps the Million Dollar Dream on DiBiase but Ted sends him into the buckle to escape.

Here’s Flair again with a belly to back supelx before it’s back to Mountie. Every remaining heel takes their shots on Virgil which is likely the best possibly option. I mean, do you want VIRGIL getting the hot tag? Flair covers him for two and puts his feet on the ropes because that’s what Flair does. DiBiase comes in and ducks his head, only to get caught by a swinging neckbreaker. There’s the hot tag to Piper who no sells everything Flair throws at him. Everything breaks down and Flair is sent to the floor. That’s important because the referee disqualifies EVERYONE in the ring, but Flair was outside and is the sole survivor.

Rating: B. Gah this was going AWESOME until the pretty lame ending. Having Flair be the sole survivor is a smart move though as it makes the fans hate him even more. This was a GREAT setup though and was on pace to be a classic before the ending. To be fair though, at the pace they were going the match would have been an hour long if they were going to do a full version. Still though, what we got was very good.

Here’s the final showdown with Bulldog at This Tuesday In Texas.

Warlord vs. British Bulldog

This is more or less based around Warlord having a full nelson as a finisher and saying no one can break it. Smith says he can. That’s it. Smith was just ridiculously awesome at this point so I’m sold pretty easily here. Naturally there’s not a word said about the match at first and it’s all about the Savage vs. Roberts thing, which is understandable. For some reason there’s a ton of times here where there’s no talking from the commentators which is never a good thing. It’s just dead air.

At least once they got done talking about the angle they focus on the match for the most part. I can understand talking about the angles a lot, but there’s no excuse for ignoring a match entirely. We’ve mainly got a power match here, but in this case it’s working. It’s odd to have Warlord go this long in a match and also against a guy that uses the same style he has. He’s managed by Harvey Whippleman.

That’s a bit early for him I thought but whatever. Hey it’s a power vs. power match and we have a bearhug. Who could have seen that coming? We’re about five minutes in and Heenan insists it’s over ten. I love hyperbole in wrestling. Usually the power vs. power doesn’t work but Smith makes up for it by having the wrestling ability to balance things out. That’s what made him so solid in the ring.

He was a hybrid wrestler that could do both styles and it allowed him to have decent matches with a lot more wrestlers than a guy like Warlord for example did. Warlord gets the Full Nelson but can’t get the hands in. His hands are on the side of the head so in essence this move is doing nothing at all.

That makes the escape look completely stupid. Smith makes the comeback and gets a decent vertical suplex which is borderline very impressive. From out of almost nowhere, Smith gets a crucifix for the quick pin. That was different if nothing else.

Rating: B-. Given what they had to work with here, this came off pretty well. Smith winning with a wrestling move instead of a power move was a nice little twist in there as everyone was expecting it to end in a power thing, but instead he does the exact opposite and it works. That’s a solid bit of psychology and it worked like a charm here. This might be Warlord’s longest match ever and it worked pretty well. Smith carried the majority of this, but not all of it.

Warlord would head over to Japan for the WAR promotion in 1993, including this match on December 15, 1993.

John Tenta vs. Warlord

A lockup doesn’t get either guy anywhere and neither does a Warlord headlock. Shoulder blocks have no effect either so Earthquake jumps up and down a bit. Warlord slams him down to a BIG pop and even the ring announcer says something. Now the shoulder block works, but Earthquake one ups him with a dropkick. This is a really slow match for the most part. An elbow drop gets two on Warlord but he actually suplexes Earthquake down in a very impressive display of strength.

Earthquake heads to the floor where he drives Warlord into the post. Warlord avoids a charge up against the post but it doesn’t seem to hurt the bigger guy all that much. Instead Earthquake comes back with some splashes in the corner and a powerslam followed by the Earthquake Splash….for two?

The fans are into Warlord now but it’s off to a bearhug to slow him down. Warlord fights out with right hands and takes Quake down with a big shoulder. A nice belly to back drops Earthquake but he’s too fat to slam. Earthquake gets two off a legdrop before getting the pin off a running clothesline and covering the shoulders with all of his weight.

Rating: C-. This was getting going but the ending really felt like a screeching halt. It’s so strange to see the Warlord getting face reactions after so many years as a heel in the WWF. Earthquake was the kind of guy that could make a crowd care about his really basic offense and he showed it here really well.

We’ll wrap it up with a one off match on Nitro, January 1, 1996.

Super Assassins vs. Sting/Lex Luger

The Super Assassins are more commonly known as the Powers of Pain but in masks. Sting takes a minute to come out. Craig Pittman comes up to the announce table again and asks Mongo to be his manager for no apparent reason. Nice to see this getting more attention than a pair of former world champions that had a major issue at the biggest show of the year.

Colonel Parker manages the masked dudes. They have yellow masks and black shirts and pants. They’re as generic as they sound. And now let’s talk about Hogan and Flair because this match still means nothing at all. Big powerbomb by the one we’ll say is Barbarian because I can’t tell them apart. A top rope headbutt confirms my guess. Hot tag to Luger and the Rack ends the Barbarian soon thereafter. Sting adds a Scorpion Deathlock for fun. They would get the tag titles soon.

Rating: D+. Glorified and extended squash with the wrestling being a backdrop to the talking to Pittman and the build up for Hogan/Flair. Notice that they have THREE angles being talked about here: Sting and Luger, the Pittman thing and the main event. This is a good look at the way the whole company would look for years. The problem is that it would stop being interesting and start being bad. Match was just a step above a squash.

Warlord was watchable when he had a talented enough guy to get in there with, but trying to have him carry something would be a disaster. He was a power lunkhead but was a great option for an enforcer role. The Powers of Pain were a solid pair of guys for a team like the Rockers to to bounce off of and then beat with a rollup but not much more beyond that. On top of that, he wasn’t around all that long as he debuted in 1986 and was gone from the WWF by early 1992. Still though, he was memorable enough and that’s more important than being good at times.

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Wrestler of the Day – December 20: Fabulous Freebirds

Time for one of the most famous tag teams of all time: the Fabulous Freebirds.

Now of course you’ve heard of the Freebird Rule, which means any two members can represent the team at any time. Therefore, this is going to be a big mix of combinations in chronological order.

The Freebirds actually got started back in the very late 1970s. The team consisted of the leader Michael Hayes, the power Terry Gordy and the technical Buddy Roberts. We’ll start things off with the team’s greatest rival and the team they’re easily best remembered against. From the David Von Erich Memorial Parade of Champions.

Six Man Tag Titles: Freebirds vs. Von Erichs

Kevin, Mike and Fritz here. The Birds are the champions and the titles are represented by a big trophy instead of belts. Mike is one of the saddest stories you’ll ever hear: He wasn’t a good wrestler in the first place and then he was injured. The injury resulted in toxic shock syndrome, which resulted in brain damage. His dad, Fritz, made him get back in the ring anyway. He committed suicide later in the 80s.

This is anything goes. Fritz is in a dress shirt and jeans. Everything breaks down quickly and chairs are thrown in. The referee says anything goes but you have to tag. Ok then. Kevin is bleeding from the big brawl. Ok so it’s officially Buddy Roberts vs. Kevin to start. Kevin beats him down and it’s a brawl in less than 10 seconds with everyone coming in. Off to Mike who goes straight for the leg.

Mike is a very small man. Hayes comes in and stomps away as the fans HATE him. A middle rope splash misses and here’s old man Fritz. Everything breaks down again and Fritz whips Hayes’ back with a belt. Kevin vs. the monster known as Terry Gordy. Gordy starts his boxing and the fans are erupting more and more every second now. If the Von Erichs win, Kerry gets Fritz’s title since Fritz is retired. I’m glad they cleared that up.

Kevin tries the Iron Claw but Gordy fights it off at the five minute mark. Hayes comes in and the fans are louder in this match than they’ve been in the whole show so far. Hayes takes off his boot to get in some shots and it’s off to Roberts. In one of the oddest moves you’ll ever seen, Roberts thrusts his hips forward so his belt buckle hits Kevin in the head. Fritz comes in and everything breaks down. Claw to Hayes and to Roberts at the same time. Hayes is busted bad. Various people are rammed into each other until Kevin comes off the top with a cross body to pin Roberts for the title.

Rating: C. This was the first decent match of the entire show. Granted a lot of that was probably due to the crowd finally being interested. This was without a doubt the feud that defines the promotion so you knew they were going to have something going on here. Not a bad match, but the rematch in July won Match of the Year from Meltzer, so check that out instead since it had Kerry so Fritz didn’t look so out of place.

And the aforementioned rematch.

Six Man Tag Team Titles: Von Erichs vs. Freebirds

The titles are vacant and this is a Badstreet Match, meaning anything goes. The heat on Michael Hayes is just nuts but the Von Erichs are as over as free beer in a frat house. It’s Kerry, Kevin and the lowly Mike here. Mike tried but he just wasn’t very athletic and it caught up with him. The brawl is on while the announcer is still doing the intros and we’re told there are NO tags, instantly making this more awesome.

The Von Erichs clean house to start but the Freebirds are right back in to keep fighting. Kevin takes off his belt to hammer on Terry Gordy but Mike is thrown to the floor to give the Von Erichs a disadvantage. Terry is sent to the floor almost immediately after and Mike comes back in, only to hit Kerry by mistake. Gordy hits Mike low to put him down and this is going WAY too fast to keep up with.

Kevin has a boot off and is hitting any bird that he can find before a triple dropkick puts Terry outside again. He gets back in and nailed with the boot over and over again before Hayes is pulled back in over the top rope. Mike spends too much time beating up Buddy Roberts though and Hayes gets in a boot shot to the back of his head. Kevin slaps the Claw on Hayes but Gordy makes the save, only to get nailed with the boot some more.

Kevin is knocked to the floor as things slow down to just insane instead of unable to keep track of anything. Gordy rakes Kerry’s face as a cameraman goes down. Mike’s foot is caught in the ropes and Kevin is busted open. Terry hits Buddy with a boot by mistake and Mike sends Roberts to the floor. Everyone is back in again and with everything going nuts, Killer Khan comes in and blasts Kerry with something, giving Hayes the pin.

Rating: A-. Oh yeah I see why this is loved. They did not stop for nine minutes straight and just beat the tar out of each other the entire time. There’s no way you can have the Von Erichs lose a straight fight and this sets up the Von Erichs vs. Khan which is fine to keep things going. Great match, though I’m not sure on Match of the Year.

The team would head to the WWF in 1984 for a handful of matches before Andre yelled at them for being late, basically sending them back to Texas. Here they are in MSG on August 25, 1984.

Fabulous Freebirds vs. Butcher Vachon/Ron Shaw/Pete Doherty

Now here’s a rarity for you. This is 2/3 falls and to the best of my knowledge, this is the maybe five matches for the Freebirds (Michael Hayes, Buddy Roberts and Terry Gordy) in the WWF. The Birds are good guys here and it’s Hayes vs. Vachon to start things off. Feeling out process to start with Hayes avoiding a shot in the corner before it’s off to Shaw. Hayes puts on a headlock and kicks Shaw in the face for good measure. Off to Roberts who pounds away on Shaw for a bit as we seem to be in squash territory.

Gordy comes in for a one arm slam before it’s off to Doherty. Back to Roberts who chases Doherty into the corner for a tag to Vachon. A slam puts Butcher down and here’s Hayes again, only to have him miss an elbow drop. The unnamed team pounds on Hayes in the corner but Gordy comes in for a save. Michael slides through the legs and tags in Gordy for a cross body to pin Vachon for the first fall.

After a break we start the second fall with Gordy locking up with Vachon. A few slams put Butcher down and it’s off to Shaw again. This goes about as well as you would expect for a jobber against a team the company is trying to get over as Buddy snaps Ron’s neck over the top rope. Doherty comes in and starts some triple teaming on Buddy which goes nowhere so here’s Hayes again to pound away. Doherty misses a legdrop and everything breaks down. Gordy gets all fired up and Doherty is backdropped down. An elbow from Roberts gets the pin.

Rating: D. I’m getting tired of writing that but it’s another uninteresting match which just kept going. The Birds would be back to likely Texas soon after this as the WWF wanted to split them up. To be fair, a three man team was only going to be able to do so much in the WWF, so the Freebirds weren’t the best fit around here.

Back to Texas now with two thirds of the original team on WCCW TV on January 6, 1985.

Terry Gordy/Chick Donovan/Buddy Roberts vs. Mr. X/Skandor Akbar/The Missing Link

This is an odd occasion where the Freebirds are faces in this company which is like Ricky Steamboat as a heel. You just don’t see it that often. The second team is Devastation Inc., which was a top heel stable for a long time. This is elimination rules, tornado rules, and you can lose by pin, submission or being thrown over the top rope. It’s also loser leaves town.

The announcer is a very different style. His voice is fine as he apparently used to be a legit sports commentator in the Dallas area, but the way he speaks is odd. He goes over the ways you can win (being counted down for the 1-2-3, being ejected from the ring or giving in via a submission. It’s just kind of odd sounding but in a refreshing way). We’re part of the NWA here also.

Missing Link is RIPPED but he has a green face. Literally, along with black hair that looks like Bozo the Clown’s. The referee is in a WCCW t-shirt and red pants. Odd looking indeed. It’s a big brawl to start as it’ll likely be the whole time. Link almost goes out but manages to come back in. If I were his manager I’d suggest that he Try Force. That should work.

Link goes out but comes back in anyway. This is all over the place and rather hard to keep up with. Only one announce here too which is kind of weird. I told you it was like ECW. Ok apparently you can go through the ropes but not over them. Got it. X tries to get rid of Gordy forever but can’t manage to get him out. Why not autoban him? Donovan is fighting Akbar who is the leader, on the floor.

Never mind as they’re back in now. And never mind that again at Donovan is thrown out. He’s out of the company apparently. Oh wow ok this just got more interesting. X gets pinned by Roberts off a sunset flip but there goes Roberts, leaving us with Akbar/Link vs. Gordy.

Gordy gets Link tied up in the ropes and gets a spike of some kind into the neck of Akbar (A guy named Akbar at a show called Star Wars? Sounds like a trap to me) but Link saves. A few seconds of double teaming later, Link misses a charge to put out Akbar and is dumped out seconds later to end it. Well that was quick.

Rating: D+. It was very exciting but from a quality standpoint it was pretty bad. To be fair I have no idea on the backstory of this though so it’s kind of hard to know why all of this is going on. The match was certainly fun and the gimmicks didn’t overwhelm it. Having it go more than 8 minutes would have helped a lot though. Still not terrible but it could have been better.

The team headed to the AWA for a bit, including this match at SuperClash 1985.

AWA Tag Titles: Freebirds vs. Road Warriors

The Warriors are defending. This is Hayes/Gordy and they have their faces painted with the Confederate Flag. The champs clear the ring before the bell and are mad over because this is in Chicago. Hawk and Gordy start as Hayes walks around the field with people yelling at him. Hawk pounds on Terry so Terry heads off to bring in Hayes. Off to Animal as the Birds stall. Ok it’s Animal vs. Gordy.

The squashing continues with the Warriors taking their shots at Gordy. Michael comes back in again and gets pounded so much he crawls back to Gordy for a tag. Terry is like uh….not right now. Gordy finally wakes up and goes after the eyes before dodging a charging Hawk to send his shoulder into the post. Hayes comes back in and hits a side suplex for two. Piledriver by Gordy mostly works but Hawk doesn’t feel like selling that much.

Hayes goes up but Hawk slams him off the top but manages to tag before Hawk can. That’s kind of impressive. Gordy and Hawk collide but there’s the hot one to Animal. Hayes stays on the apron as Animal destroys Gordy, getting two off a powerslam. Everything breaks down and even Roberts and Ellering come in. Ellering gets dropped with a chair and Gordy accidentally pops Hayes. Powerslam to Hayes by Animal and a shoulder to Gordy looks to finish but Hayes comes off the middle rope with something around his hand to knock Animal out for the pin and the titles! The place is stunned.

Rating: D+. This one didn’t quite work either. The whole match was a mess and the ending was hard to follow due to everything going all nuts. The Warriors were still in the period where they would do nothing but run people over, which ran for about the next six or eight years. Bad match for the most part, but you know what’s coming.

And this one at WrestleRock 1986.

Road Warriors vs. Freebirds

Thank goodness this is the last match. This actually took place before the other tag two cage matches, but Verne had to go on last on the real card. The tape version makes him seem more humble at least. This is Hayes/Garvin. Hawk and Hayes get things going. Hayes immediately hits a piledriver which is of course no sold. Let the pain begin. Hayes goes into the cage a few times and he’s busted quickly.

Gorilla press to Hayes and Hawk drops a right hand. Garvin runs away from a tag so Hayes tries to climb out. Hawk goes up top as well and Michael is knocked to the floor. Garvin finally gets the tag and he’s tentative at best. Why no Animal yet? Oh there he is, for a TEN REP gorilla press. Now Hayes runs from the tag.

And never mind as he comes in a few seconds alter. Hayes gets in a few shots but Hawk runs him over quickly. He bites the cut on Hayes’ head because Hawk is a little nuts. Garvin comes in to pound on him and it’s back to Hayes for a figure four. Hawk easily breaks it and it’s back to Garvin, whose offense is shrugged off. Not hot tag to Animal and everything breaks down. Hayes pulls out some brass knuckles but he hits Garvin by mistake so Animal gets the easy pin.

Rating: D. According to the announcer that gives the Warriors revenge for something, but again it’s not important enough to tell us about. This was about as dominant of a match as you can see without it being a squash. The Birds never had a chance but they were against the Road Warriors so that shouldn’t be a shock. The Warriors left the AWA after this match.

It’s off to the NWA now as Jimmy Garvin will start taking over the role of Hayes’ partner with Gordy heading to Japan and Roberts retiring. However, they did have a few major matches together, including at the 1987 Great American Bash.

Freebirds vs. Paul Jones/Manny Fernandez/Ivan Koloff

The Birds are faces here which takes some getting used to. This is the original lineup too with Hayes, Gordy and Roberts. Hayes and Fernandez start us off and Fernandez looks like an idiot after that exchange. Roberts comes in and gets double teamed by a cheating Jones (normally a manager) and Koloff. Koloff comes in to beat on Roberts and its hard to believe he was WWF Champion at one point. Jones comes in and isnt very good. Heres Terry Gordy and this would be like Sheamus vs. Runjin Singh. Things break down and an elbow drop ends Jones quickly.

Rating: D+. Just a quick match here that didnt mean much. Gordy was a monster though and ran through everybody at the end. He would team with Williams in 1992 in one of the most successful yet boring tag teams of the period. Anyway, nothing match and Paul Jones is one of the worst characters and managers of all time. This was from Atlanta as well.

Time to hit TV with Hayes and Garvin entering a tournament for the vacant NWA World Tag Team Titles. Here are the finals and semifinals at Clash of the Champions VII.

World Tag Team Title Tournament Semifinals: Dynamic Dudes vs. Freebirds

The Dudes are Johnny (John Laurinitis) and Shane (Shane Douglas), a couple of guys that ride skateboards. The Freebirds are Michael Hayes and Jimmy Garvin, the latter of whom is a replacement for Terry Gordy (in the corner tonight) who wanted to be a singles wrestler again. Garvin has been affiliated with the team for years but never officially joined them. Johnny and Shane beat Rip Morgan and Jack Victory in the first round while the Freebirds beat the Road Warriors. One more note: it’s roughly 100 degrees in the building as there are about 1000 people there and there was no air conditioning.

The Freebirds try to get in a cheap shot to start but walk into a pair of suplexes, sending them outside. Johnny and Michael get things going with Hayes quickly being taken down by an armdrag. Garvin comes in and gets the same treatment before the shorter Dude comes in for a wristlock of his own. A double elbow drop has Garvin in even more trouble Michael and Shane come back in with Hayes getting caught in a sunset flip for two. Back to Johnny who misses a cross body and crashes to the mat, allowing Jimmy to come back in and stomp away.

Johnny is sent to the floor and chopped by Hayes as the fans are all over the Freebirds. Back up and the two of them ram heads, allowing for the hot tag to Shane. Hayes breaks up another sunset flip attempt and everything breaks down. A double dropkick puts Hayes on the floor but the referee gets Johnny onto the apron. Shane rolls up Garvin for two but Michael slides back in and lays Shane out for the DDT, giving Jimmy the easy pin. This was the Dudes’ first loss.

Rating: C. Basic match here but there’s nothing wrong with that. The new Freebirds needed a win to establish themselves as a threat for later and the Dudes were far too new to be a threat. Surprisingly enough Gordy never interfered, despite being one of the most famous cheaters in wrestling.

World Tag Team Titles: Freebirds vs. Midnight Express

During the entrances, Dangerously comes out with a tennis racket and knocks Cornette silly. The Midnights take the racket and open the case, exposing a horseshoe and a chain inside. The Dynamic Dudes come out to carry Cornette to the back, leaving the Midnights at a 3-2 disadvantage. Hayes and Lane get things going with Stan scoring with some slams and armdrags, sending Hayes to the corner for a tag off to Garvin. Eaton comes in as well to drop an elbow on Garvin’s neck before bringing Lane back in for an enziguri.

A double back elbow gets two on Garvin and Jimmy is furious. The Freebirds have a meeting on the floor until Garvin comes back in for a knee to Eaton’s ribs. Bobby is thrown to the floor and Hayes pops him in the face with a right hand. Stan protects his partner from an even worse beating and get him a breather. Eaton makes it back onto the apron but gets knocked off onto the barricade to make things even worse.

Back inside and Garvin hooks a chinlock but Eaton fights up and sends him into the corner. Instead of trying to put up a fight, Eaton is smart enough to head right to the corner and tag in Lane who DDTs Hayes and tags Bobby back in far too soon. Everything breaks down and Lane dropkicks Hayes outside for a moment. Terry Gordy tries to interfere but gets knocked outside before Garvin takes the double flapjack for two. The referee is with Lane, allowing Gordy to come in and powerbomb Eaton, giving Garvin the pin and the titles.

Rating: C-. Not a terrible match here and the idea of the Midnights being off their game due to Cornette not being around made sense. This was quite the year for Hayes as he had a brief US Title reign after stealing the title from Lex Luger at WrestleWar. The Midnights weren’t having the best year but they would eventually round back into form.

Gordy would pop up for one more match at the 1989 Great American Bash.

WarGames: Freebirds/Samoan Swat Team vs. Road Warriors/Midnight Express/Steve Williams

In case you don’t know the rules: two guys start for five minutes and then we have a coin toss (the heels will win) and the winning team gets to send in another man for a two on one advantage. This lasts for two minutes until the losing team gets to tie it up at two. After two minutes the winning team goes up three to two. You alternate every two minutes until everyone is in there and when everyone is in there, it’s first submission wins it. No pins.

Eaton vs. Garvin starts us off. Williams is still in his Hogan attire here which makes me laugh. As JR puts it, it’s Beautiful vs. Gorgeous in WarGames which got a chuckle out of me. Garvin controls early but it’s not like it means anything. The Freebirds beat the Express in a tournament final to win the world tag titles so there’s your explanation for this part of the feud. This is more or less back and forth with nothing really to report on.

Dangerously, the Samoans’ manager, says that Hayes will be next about 10 times. Eaton controls for the most part and works on the back of the mullet-tastic Garvin before throwing on a Boston Crab. After Dangerously shouts about Hayes being in next, Terry Gordy comes in next. That’s another great example of a great heel manager. He didn’t accomplish anything but he lied BECAUSE HE COULD. So simple yet so effective.

Gordy comes in and it goes badly for Eaton to put it mildly. Garvin has a glove and tape or something or his hand so this is mainly punching and stomping. He eats a lot of cage too as Garvin is mostly fine. Apparently Eaton failed in his mission to hurt him. Williams comes in to even things up and in one of the most mind blowing spot I’ve ever seen, he picks up Gordy, who is probably 290 at the least, and gorilla presses him EIGHT times into the cage. Just insane.

After some more choking the heels get us back to about even for Samu to come in as Eaton is more or less dead. Double fishhook on him by Garvin which looked very painful. Everyone is in one ring and they need to spread it out a bit. Eacon somehow gets back up and holds the heels off a bit until Animal ties it up again. Again they’re all in the same ring and it’s WAY too crowded in there.

Ah there we go as he and Samu head to the other ring. Much better. They hate each other because of a big beatdown the Samoans gave the Road Warriors and then they beat up Ellering, the Road Warriors’ manager. The Warriors cost the Samoans a spot in the finals of the tag tournament, which brings us here. Animal just destroys everyone as Fatu will be in next.

All six in the same ring still and it’s just stupid. There’s (Rikishi) Fatu to make it 4-3. The Samoans beat down Animal as Williams and Gordy are in the other ring now to space things out a bit. Eaton and Garvin are still fighting and here comes Stan Lane to even it up at four apiece again. That leaves Hayes and Hawk as the last two. The Samoans eat metal as Lane cleans house.

Dangerously to Hayes: Ok so when you go in you go over here. Hayes: I GOTTA GO IN???” Dangerously: There’s no one left! Hayes: Dang. Funny stuff. There are 9 people in the match and 9 are in the same ring. Hayes DDTs everyone to take out the faces and then goes off into the other ring to taunt Hawk. The fans want Hawk with one minute left. Hayes drops Eaton with a hard left and here’s the bird man.

Now it’s first submission wins. Hawk cleans house as it is on in a big way. The faces are dominating here as was the custom in WarGames once everyone got in. Dangerously tries to force the phone through the cage and turns around to see a referee with his arms folded looking at him. I need some wawa music there.

Mainly just punching now with nothing of note as far as flow or anything but that’s a good thing here as there isn’t supposed to be anything remotely resembling order. Look at the first name of the match: WAR. Doomsday Device on Gordy is blocked so Hawk kills Garvin with a clothesline and works on his neck, throwing on a hangman (Hawk grabs Garvin for a reverse neckbreaker and lifts him onto his back in a neck crank/choke) which gets the submission to end it.

Rating: B+. Very solid battle in there which was exactly what this was supposed to be. It’s not a classic or one of the best ever but this was quite good for the point of blowing this feud completely off and have all the feuds in there at once. This was effective for what it was supposed to be and the match was as fun as ever. Good match.

Back to the regular tag team at Clash IX.

Freebirds vs. Road Warriors

Non-title. The Freebirds are still listed as World Tag Team Champions here, despite having lost the titles at a taped show a few days prior to this. Hawk and Hayes get things going and Michael runs from a big right hand. Animal throws him back inside so Hawk can kick him in the face.

The fans are all over the Freebirds here and it’s off to Animal vs. Garvin with Animal no selling Jimmy’s suplex. Hayes comes in and avoids a running shoulder block but it’s quickly back to Hawk to crank on the arm. Animal gets taken into the evil corner for some double teaming and Hawk doesn’t care for it. Everything breaks down and Hawk throws the referee down for the DQ.

Rating: D. This didn’t have time to go anywhere and the Freebirds were never really in control. The Road Warriors weren’t a good choice for opponents here as they were far too dominant to be threatened by the Freebirds. At least the fans reacted to the Warriors though and that’s the right idea for an opening match.

And again at Clash XI.

Southern Boys vs. Freebirds

The Southern Boys are Steve Armstrong and Tracy Smothers dressed like Confederate soldiers in their major show debut. The Freebirds jump them to start but get taken down by running forearms. Double clotheslines send the Freebirds to the floor and the fans are all fired up. Garvin and Smothers get things going with Tracy running into a knee in the corner. Hayes tries to interfere so the Southern Boys dropkick both Freebirds outside again.

Hayes comes in off the tag but gets in an argument with the fans before any action occurs. It’s off to Steve as well but Garvin gets the tag and scores with a backbreaker. Hayes cranks on an armbar before getting two off an elbow drop. A slam puts Armstrong down again but he gets up fast enough to slam Hayes off the top. Tracy and Jimmy come in off the tags as everything breaks down. Hayes takes Tracy’s head off with a clothesline but Steve comes off the top with a headbutt to Garvin’s back, giving Smothers the pin.

Rating: C-. The Southern Boys were a nice breath of air to the division as there was a big shift towards power teams around this time. They were both young and quick and a win over former World Tag Team Champions was going to make them look even better. The match didn’t have time to go anywhere but it was decent enough and the fans got into the ending.

The Birds would get a World Tag Team Title shot at WrestleWar 1991.

World Tag Titles: Doom vs. Fabulous Freebirds

There’s a somewhat famous story to this that I’ll get to after the match is over. Before the match, DDP, the Freebirds’ manager, brings out Big Daddy Dink to be their road manager, whatever that means. Simmons and Hayes get us going and Simmons hits a quick spinebuster for two. Hayes hits a left hand for the same. Both Birds take powerslams for two. Garvin and Reed come in with Reed clotheslining his head off.

Garvin hooks a sunset flip for two and it’s back to Hayes. Reed looks a bit uninterested in the match for some reason. Garvin makes a blind tag but doesn’t jump Reed while he’s busy for some reason. A double elbow takes Garvin down and it’s back to Simmons. Boring match so far. Jimmy gets sent to the floor and hammered out there before it’s back to Reed in the ring. This is heel vs. heel for the most part so the dynamic is a bit off. Powerslam gets two on Garvin but Dink gets on the apron. Reed loads up his fist but hits Simmons by mistake, giving Garvin the pin and the titles.

Rating: F+. This was a horribly boring match. The whole idea here was that Doom is still having issues and would be broken up very soon. The Birds would be the subject of the story that I mentioned earlier which I’ll get to in a minute. The match sucked though as it was basically a squash with a screwy ending.

Post match Reed destroys Simmons with the object. Teddy leaves with Reed.

So as for the story, the Birds had actually lost the titles before they won them. At a TV taping six days prior to this, they were taped losing the titles to the Steiners, as in nearly a week before they won the belts. That was a very different time, as whole PPVs would be spoiled at TV tapings. Can you imagine that happening today?

Here’s a US Tag Team Title match from SuperBrawl 1991, with a more detailed description of the -6 days title reign story.

US Tag Titles: Freebirds vs. Young Pistols

Ok now hold on because this one if about as confusing as possible. Actually this match isn’t but the story leading up to it is cool so I might as well go into it anyway. As for this match, the Steiners were the US champions but when they won the world tag titles from the Freebirds the US belts were stripped and put up in a tournament, which this is the final of. Ok, that’s very standard stuff.

The WEIRD part is how the Steiners got the world tag titles. The Freebirds won them on February 24, 1991 and lost them February 18, 1991. You read that correctly. See, back in the day WCW would tape MONTHS of shows in advance over about a three week period. Think of what TNA does now but on a much bigger scale.

Anyway, the Freebirds won the titles at a PPV called Wrestle War which we might get to later as there’s a great WarGames match on there, which is of course the greatest gimmick match of all time. Anyway, they won the belts on a Sunday, but the taping where they lost the belts (which no one had seen them win yet) took place on the Monday BEFORE the PPV where they won them.

I think you can see the problems that this could cause and it bit them in late 1993 when Sid was supposed to win the world title at Starrcade but at a show in England he legitimately stabbed Arn Anderson with a pair of scissors so obviously he was fired. WCW had about three or four months of tapes set up with him as world champion, so those were now worthless and they had to scrap the whole thing.

This is why in the mid to late 90s on syndicated shows like Worldwide or the Main Event, you never see guys with belts as the commentary could easily be redone. So yeah, the Freebirds lost a pair of titles almost a week before winning them. Their reign lasted -6 days, which is how it’s recorded in a lot of sources. Oh yeah there’s a match here.

The Young Pistols were a cowboy kind of tag team that did nothing at all. It was Tracy Smothers, who would become far more famous and I use that term very loosely, and Steve Armstrong, whose brother is Brian, or Road Dogg. The Freebirds were legendary heels in WCCW out of Dallas and revolutionized heel tag team wrestling. This pairing is nowhere near that as they’re both old and more or less worthless at this point.

The original trio of Buddy Roberts, Michael Hayes and Terry Gordy is gone and it’s now Hayes and Jimmy Garvin who by law had to have made at least 5 adult movies in the 70s looks like he does. Anyway, this is for the midcard tag titles. That’s saying a lot about the tag title scene. Not only was there a strong world tag title scene, but there was enough of one to warrant a midcard tag title. That’s saying a lot.

If nothing else the Freebirds have the greatest theme song ever with Badstreet USA. Oh and they’re part of a stable called the Diamond Mine, which is run by one Diamond Dallas Page. Oh and they have a manager named Big Daddy Dink, who you would know from the 80s as Oliver Humperdink. Ok most of you won’t but he existed. Page is just a manager here and is already in his mid to late 20s here so he started WAY late.

The Birds are supposed to be a rock band here and to their credit Hayes sings their theme song so there we are. The Pistols are from Wyoming of all places. My goodness this has to be a record for longest amount of writing just to set up a match. There’s the bell and it’s Armstrong and Hayes. I can’t tell the Pistols apart which is likely because I don’t want to. Uh oh Ross is using football analogies. This could be a long night.

Brad Armstrong, Steve’s other brother and the most talented of the three comes out to balance out Dink which makes sense at least. The referee throws Dink out so that’s good as Brad leaves also. Steve completely misses a clothesline but Hayes sells it anyway. Have to love that old school mentality and experience shining through there. The Pistols actually aren’t terrible. They’re not good but there are far worse teams.

Ah there we are with some nice cheating to get the advantage swung. Sometimes all it takes is pulling a rope down and the heels are very heelish. Tracy freaking DIVES for a tag which looked a lot funnier than it should have. In a bad looking spot, the Pistols both go for missile dropkicks. Armstrong misses completely and Smothers hits Garvin but Garvin doesn’t do anything and Smothers goes down.

The Pistols are all over the place but they’re not hitting a lot of stuff. Dusty says there are going to be new champions here. Gee Dusty you think? In a tournament final there will be new champions?

After a ref bump, a masked guy in what would be called a black chicken suit comes out and beats up the Pistols, hitting both with DDTs from the middle ropes which would be the same as they stand on the mat while he does them but whatever. That gets the Birds the titles. While it was never revealed on TV, the guy in the suit was Brad Armstrong.

Rating: B-. I liked it. It’s a very formula based match but that’s often times the best thing you could ask for and this is no exception. It’s basic heel vs. face stuff but it held my attention for ten minutes which is more than most modern tag matches do. This was fine, but some people would be bored with it I think.

Off to the infamously awful Great American Bash 1991 with the team joined by the masked Badstreet, who didn’t last long but was incredibly talented.

Young Pistols/Dustin Rhodes vs. Freebirds

The Pistols are Tracy Smothers and Steve Armstrong (later named the Southern Boys) while the Birds are Hayes/Garvin/Badstreet, who is Brad Armstrong (Steve’s real life brother) in a mask. The Birds are the US Tag and Six Man Tag Champions and this is elimination rules. Rhodes and Hayes get us going and I guess you can call them the captains. Hayes spends the first minute gyrating and strutting. Rhodes does the same thing which is funny but still time wasting.

They finally make contact with some chops followed by Dustin slamming both of the regular team members. The Birds chill on the floor and Hayes yells at the crowd a bit. To his credit it gets the crowd to start a short Freebirds Suck chant, which is one of the first of the night. Garvin hits Rhodes in the back so Hayes can take over. The Birds hit the Pistols so Dustin takes both Birds down, allowing the Pistols to hit top rope shoulders. The Freebirds go to the floor again as things pause for the third time in less than four minutes.

Off to Garvin vs. Smothers and the Birds take more time to pose. Tracy hits a dropkick but misses his second, giving Garvin control again. Off to Armstrong who slams his brother off the top, followed by a BIG top rope clothesline. Badstreet goes to the floor and things stall again. Hayes comes in and it’s back to Smothers who works on the arm. Badstreet messes with Tracy enough to bring him to the floor where Tracy runs into a clothesline from Big Daddy Dink, the Birds’ manager.

Smothers finally gets back up to the apron but Hayes drops him with a right hand. We finally get back in and Garvin pounds away on him a bit. Off to Badstreet who dances in and clotheslines Tracy down. Hayes comes back in with a sleeper, which might be the most appropriate move that he could do. Tracy finally breaks out of it and gets a bit of offense in, only to run into a GREAT left hand to put him down.

Back to Garvin who gets two off a snap mare and hooks a chinlock. The fans chant what sounds like Gordy as Badstreet comes in and hits a neckbreaker for two on Smothers. Back to Hayes for some chops in the corner and a BIG left to drop Tracy. Hayes may be annoying but he can throw a mean left. The DDT is blocked though and there’s the tag to Armstrong. Everything breaks down and Armstrong goes for Badstreet’s mask. That lets Hayes and Badstreet hit a double DDT to eliminate Steve.

Maybe five seconds later, Hayes backdrops Tracy over the top rope to eliminate him (Hayes) by DQ. Garvin tags Badstreet in to slam Tracy, followed by a top rope ax handle. Back to Garvin and here’s Dink on the apron. Due to the distraction the tag to Dustin is missed, so the Birds DDT Armstrong to eliminate him. Again maybe five seconds later, Dustin clotheslines Garvin’s head off to get it down to one on one. So it’s Rhodes vs. Badstreet with the masked man in control. Dustin comes back with the lariat but Dink distracts the referee again. And never mind as the bulldog gets the pin to give Rhodes’ team the win.

Rating: D. This was another match that was long and boring. When the best thing in the match is a few left hands from Michael Hayes, you can tell you don’t have much. Dustin was brand new at this point and he had nothing as a result. The match here wasn’t so much bad as it was boring, which at this point is the worst thing they could have done out there.

One more US Tag Team Title match at WrestleWar 1992.

US Tag Titles: Greg Valentine/Terry Taylor vs. Freebirds

It amazes me how far tag wrestling has fallen. There are midcard tag titles here. The Freebirds are faces here and for the life of me I don’t get what was seen in Valentine and Taylor as a team. There are two rings here which is always kind of strange but it’s still cool. The Freebirds both use the DDT here so they’re looking for the quick win. Fonzie from ECW is the referee here.

Taylor and Hayes start us off and the fans more or less hate Taylor. At least they’re smart. It’s just strange seeing the Freebirds as faces. Also Greg Valentine is a champion in 1992. What’s weird about this picture? A backhand chop is a judo chop according to Jim. For those of you unsure, the Freebirds are Jimmy Garvin (no one of note really) and Michael Hayes, who is currently the head writer for Smackdown.

ALL Freebirds so far but this is a long match so there’s plenty of time left. We’re about eight minutes in and the champions haven’t been on offense longer than maybe 20 seconds yet. I could watch Valentine fall on his face every day. It’s just perfectly done. The heels take over for a bit and I emphasize the bit part since Garvin takes over again to get us to even.

Hayes gets a hot tag and cleans house. The crowd is hot tonight which gives me a good feeling about the main event. Hayes gets hit in the back of the head with the Five Arm, Terry’s finisher but it only gets two. Fans are completely behind the Freebirds. Taylor gets a gutwrench powerbomb for two on Hayes which is a move I wish we saw more often. We’re nearly fifteen minutes in and Jesse says it’s too early to go for the figure four.

Valentine works on the arm which is just weird for him but whatever. This has been a good match so I can live with that. Another hot tag to Garvin and he cleans house. Everything goes insane and Garvin gets a DDT on Taylor for the pin and the titles. Solid opener and the crowd is happy so everything worked. The titles would be retired in July so it’s not like it means much.

Rating: B. Great opener here as the crowd was way into it and the title change works well to open a show. Starting a show with a good tag match is pretty much a universally good idea and this was no exception. I’m not a fan of any of these four but this was a very solid match and has me wanting to watch more of the show, which is exactly the point of an opener.

The NWA decided to vacate their World Tag Team Titles in 1992 for a tournament because they’re annoying and not that bright. The Freebirds had a first round match at Clash of the Champions XIX.

NWA World Tag Team Title Tournament First Round: Silver Kings vs. Freebirds

The Silver Kings are Silver King and El Texano but they’re called #1 and #2 here. The Freebirds are the US Tag Team Champions, so of course they’re unseeded (just like the Silver Kings). Hayes reverses an Irish whip so #2 dropkicks #1 and Michael gets two off a slam. Garvin comes in and cranks on the wrist before it’s off to #2, sending Garvin running away.

#2 misses a missile dropkick and Garvin hammers away before getting two off a suplex. Hayes gets the tag and stomps away in the corner before strutting a lot. #1 comes in again as Jesse thinks this sounds like a Dr. Seuss book. A top rope elbow gets two for #1 and the Silver Kings clean house. Things settle down again and #2 hits a dropkick on Hayes and takes him down with a drop toehold.

Back to Garvin who grabs a chinlock for a few seconds before both guys get up and make tags. #1 comes back in and dropkicks Hayes in the ribs before #2 comes in with a missile dropkick for two. Hayes finally nails his big left hand and everything breaks down. The fans want the DDT but get a pair of bad dropkicks to send the Birds outside. The Kings use what would become the 619 to send the Freebirds running away before #2 dives on them both. Hayes accidentally punches Garvin but #1 misses a dive and hits #2. Michael slides in for a small package on #1 for the pin.

Rating: D-. This is a great example of two teams just completely clashing. There was no chemistry at all out there and both teams looked horrible. The Freebirds couldn’t keep up with the lucha libre team and the Silver Kings were very sloppy. I don’t know who thought this was a good match but it didn’t work at all.

And we’ll wrap it up with their second round match at Great American Bash 1992.

NWA Tag Title Tournament Quarter-Finals: Fabulous Freebirds vs. Hiroshi Hase/Shinya Hashimoto

There’s a possibility this is out of order as I’ve found two different match orders in different places. This might be the third match on the card but I’m not sure. Either way it doesn’t make a ton of difference as the other match is up next anyway. Hashimoto is a huge guy who throws a lot of kicks. Hase is pretty good, whereas the Birds are just kind of there. Hayes and Hase get us going and it’s time to strut.

Hayes controls with a headscissors on the mat but Hase escapes with ease. Off to an armbar by Hayes and Garvin gets the tag. Hashimoto comes in and things slow down. This is a horribly bad contrast of styles here and I don’t really expect that much from it. They head to the mat and this isn’t going to be pretty. You can see the big problem with tournaments shining through here: there’s no story to any of these matches so they’re just wrestling matches which may be good and may be bad. That makes it hard to get into them almost every time.

Hase comes in for a few seconds before Hashimoto comes in for his famous kicks. Hayes comes in to pound away with “American right hands”, a JR trademarked term. Hayes hooks a quick armbar but Hashimoto hits him in the throat to escape. Hase hits a gutbuster and shouts a bit. Bach to Shinya for more kicks which is about all his offense consists of. A fallaway slam suplex gets two on Hayes.

Michael gets double teamed in the corner as the announcers talk about skunks. The Japanese guys get thrown together and won’t get out of the ring. Hayes punches them down and tags Garvin as everything breaks down. Hase hits a northern lights suplex on Garvin to advance.

Rating: D. This was bad and uninteresting. Hase was good but when you’re the only watchable guy in the whole match (yes I know Hashimoto is a legend), there’s only so much you can do. This was nothing at all and thankfully it was the shortest match of the show. The Japanese guys got loudly booed by the southern crowd of course.

The Freebirds may not have been the best in ring combination but they were masters at talking people into the seats. They were HATED in WCCW and were the perfect rivals for the Von Erichs. Hayes was an amazing talker and there really wasn’t a combination that didn’t work at least to a degree. Even the Garvin/Hayes combination won a bunch of titles, even though they aren’t as famous. The Freebirds are as influential of a team as you’ll find and they’re well worth looking up.

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Wrestler of the Day – December 16: Mike Shaw

Today we’re looking at a rather versatile guy named Mike Shaw.

Bastion, real name Mike Shaw, got started back in Canada around 1981. Here he is in Stampede in the early 1980s.

Jim Neidhart vs. Mike Shaw

This is joined in progress, as is almost always the case in Stampede. We’re about seven minutes in and Shaw sends Neidhart into the corner to start. Off to a chinlock for a bit before Neidhart fights up and sends Shaw into the corner to even things out. They stare at each other for a bit before getting down into three point stances. Neidhart wins with ease and punches Mike down before nailing a hard shot to the ribs. The referee calls it a low blow though and the match is over.

This is from some point in the mid 80s from Canada’s Atlantic Grand Prix Wrestling.

Rocky Delasara/Len Montana vs. Man Mountain Mike/Great Malumba

Shaw is a hillbilly named Man Mountain Mike and Malumba is a tribal guy. The ring is only about two and a half feet off the floor for a weird visual. Delasara starts with Mike and the big guy puts the jobber on the top. Mike easily overpowers Rocky (nicknamed the Italian Stallion) and it’s off to Malumba for a hard whip across the ring. Montana comes in as well and eats a quick shoulder for a slow motion fall.

The big guys keep control as it’s off to Shaw for a back elbow to the jaw. Len finally gets in a rake to the eyes to take over on Mike as the heels (I’m assuming) take over on the Mountain. That lasts all of five seconds before it’s Malumba coming back in to nail Delasara in the head. Rocky sends him into the corner though and take over for a few moments again.

Malumba uses the powers of a hard black head to survive for a bit before avoiding an elbow drop. Back to Mike to clean house with standard power man stuff, including a legdrop for two on Montana. A splash gets the same before it’s back to Malumba for a headbutt and the pin.

Rating: D+. This went on longer than it needed to but the point was made well enough. I liked the Malumba guy as he had good energy and enough of an offense to get him through the match. It’s always fun to check out random promotions like this as you never know what you’re going to find.

Here’s another match from Stampede in 1987/88 with Shaw as the evil Makhan Singh against North American Heavyweight Champion Owen Hart.

North American Heavyweight Title: Owen Hart vs. Makhan Singh

Hart is very banged up and we’re joined about eight minutes in with him nailing a back elbow to the jaw to take over. He chokes away as the announcers tell us this has been all Owen so far. Singh goes after the bad eye to take over and attacks it with a foreign object of some kind to cut the eye open. The ring announcer actually calls a doctor in to look at the eye as the match just stops.

Singh will have none of that and takes the bandage off to stay on the eye. He ties Owen in the Tree of Woe and stays on the eye as this is getting ugly. Singh actually gets a yellow card and the doctor stops the match. The referee will have none of that though as Hart comes back with a slam and goes up top, only to miss a splash. Keith Hart comes out to throw in the towel and the match is over, meaning Singh is champion.

Rating: C+. They nailed the emotion stuff here as the fans were entirely behind Hart who would never give up. Singh looked like a killer out there who would do anything to take the title, which made him winning all the better. These two traded the title several times so this wasn’t over yet.

It was off to WCW after this as Shaw became the insane Norman the Lunatic. Here he is at Clash of the Champions VII.

Norman the Lunatic vs. Mike Justice

Norman is a mental patient managed by Teddy Long and more famous as Bastion Booger in the WWF. He easily runs Mike over, crushes him in the corner and sits on his chest for the pin in less than a minute. Teddy holds up a set of keys, symbolizing Norman being locked up again, to calm him down and get Norman on a stretcher.

And again at Clash VIII in the best match Shaw ever had.

Flyin Brian vs. Norman the Lunatic

Brian Pillman comes out with the University of South Carolina cheerleaders and starts fast with a quick suplex on the nearly 400lb Norman. The springboard clothesline puts Norman down on the floor and Brian hits a nice dive off the top. Back inside and Brian goes after the keys that freak Norman out, causing Norman to jump him from behind. A middle rope splash gets two on Brian and Norman slaps his overly large stomach.

Brian rolls outside and gets crushed against the post but avoids a second charge to get a breather. Back in and a missile dropkick puts Norman on his back. Brian actually slams and backdrops Norman down, only to have his cross body get caught in a powerslam for two. Norman whips him in but Pillman comes back with a crucifix for the pin out of nowhere.

Rating: B+. This match wasn’t even four minutes long but had more action than matches four times that long. Brian looked awesome out there with his high flying and Norman looked FAR better than you would expect a guy of his size to be capable of. Absolutely awesome match with some great action.

Back to form at Clash X.

Norman the Lunatic vs. Kevin Sullivan

We get another vignette with Norman going to a zoo to count pigs for no apparent reason. There’s no background or history given for this match but I’d assume it’s because they’re both crazy. Sullivan jumps him to start and hammers away but Norman sends him into the post and sits on Kevin’s chest for two. Norman slams him off the top, only to miss a middle rope splash and change control. Sullivan takes him to the floor for a slam and a two count in a nice power display.

A knee to the head has Norman in trouble and Cornette is on fire on commentary. “Norman is so stupid that mind readers only charge him half price.” Norman starts beating on his own head before Sullivan starts pounding on it for him. Back inside and Norman chokes him out to the floor as they fight up the aisle.

Sullivan backdrops him on the ramp for two and they fight into the back. The fans are annoyed because they can’t see anything and they go into the women’s bathroom. This was a tradition of Sullivan’s brawls as I can think of at least three instances where this happened over his career. Sounds of violence are heard behind the door until Norman comes out holding a toilet seat and being declared the winner.

Rating: D+. The brawling wasn’t bad but the falls count anywhere stipulation was only there to set up the comedy ending. Norman wasn’t the best choice as a face as his in ring work was limited due to his size. Sullivan was stuck without anything to do at this point as he works better with a stable around him.

Here’s a better opponent at WrestleWar 1990.

Cactus Jack Manson vs. Norman the Lunatic

Yes it’s Mick Foley and no he doesn’t mean a thing yet. He’s pretty much just thrown onto the card here, much like Cuban Assassin was last time. Jack jumps him to start but gets thrown to the floor with ease. JR: “This will not be a battle of wits. It may be a battle of nitwits.” Also Jack’s favorite color is light black and wants to be the foreman of the Double Cross Ranch.

Jack rams Norman’s head into the buckle and Norman says do it again. A quick bearhug goes on Jack but he’s soon whipped over the corner and out to the floor in a big crash. Headbutt knocks Jack off the apron but misses a charge into the post. Back in and Cactus rips at his face. Cactus pounds him down and it’s off to a chinlock. The electric chair drop puts Jack down but a splash misses. Jack tries a sunset flip but Norman drops onto him for the pin.

Rating: D. Yeah it was bad but Foley of course would get a lot more going for him. Norman is more famous as Bastion Booger and a lot of other bad characters in WWF. Jack was clearly going to be a guy that bumped like mad, but at the end of the day what sets him apart is that he made people care about him as opposed to guys like say New Jack.

Then a six man at Capital Combat.

Road Warriors/Norman the Lunatic vs. Cactus Jack/Kevin Sullivan, Bam Bam Bigelow

Norman the Lunatic is more commonly known as Bastion Booger. This is a weird pairing of six guys if there has ever been one. Oliver Humperdink is here too as Bigelow’s manager and is bare-chested. This is just strange as all goodness on all levels and I have no idea what the point of this is supposed to be. The LOD comes out on Harleys while Norman has to walk behind them. That sums up this match nicely.

How funny is it that of all these people, Cactus Jack was the most successful? Cactus is very young at this point and has nothing going for him. Norman is allegedly an escaped mental patient. That sums things up very well. Animal and the future four time world champion start us off. Animal is MOVING out there. He does two leap frogs and drops low at great speed. This is just weird to see but interesting I’d say.

Hawk vs. Bigelow. Oh dear. Bigelow is sleeveless here which is a strange look for him. This could set selling back a thousand years. Hawk gets the best dropkick he’s ever thrown, hitting Bam Bam square in the face. Sullivan comes in, looks at Hawk, and tags out. Instead he gets Norman. For him imagine Eugene meets Bigelow. See what I mean? In a painful looking spot, Hawk throws the (wooden) steps at Jack where they just bounce off his back while he’s bent over.

OW even if they’re fake. They all take their turns beating on Norman and Sullivan just looks completely out of place in this. Bigelow backdrops Norman. Imagine that one if you can. Norman hits a clothesline on Cactus and just falls on his back. That sums things up for him quite well I’d think. A big old brawl breaks out as Hawk hits the top rope clothesline on Sullivan for the pin.

Rating: D+. Not bad I guess, but at the same time when the best technician is Kevin Sullivan, you’re in trouble. This was to get the crowd going though and I think it worked ok for what it was. That and I can’t imagine they expected this to be a great match or anything, so I’ll let it slide I guess.

Shaw would be repackaged into a truck driver named Trucker Norm. Here he is on WCW TV, October 27, 1990.

Trucker Norm vs. Keith Hart

Hart is billed from Tennessee for some reason and attacks Norm before the bell. That’s about the extent of his offense to start and Norm knocks him outside where manager the Juicer (as in Beetlejuice. Seriously, he was played by Art Barr.) throws powder in his face. Back in and a splash crushes Hart in the corner before Norm sits on him for the pin.

After a few years out of the spotlight, Shaw debuted in the WWF as Friar Ferguson. It’s exactly what it sounds like. From Raw, April 12, 1993.

Friar Ferguson vs. Chris Duffy

Duffy shoves the Friar, in full robes, around to start but the Friar easily backdrops him. A catapult sends Duffy out to the floor and the Friar pulls the robes up a bit to do a little dance. He splashes Duffy for two but pulls up off the cover. The fans say they want Bret as this beating just keeps going. We hit a lame nerve hold before Duffy tries a sunset flip, allowing the Friar to sit on him for the pin.

Rating: F. This was during the “let’s just throw out stupid gimmicks and wonder why no one cares” period which would be amplified in the coming years. The Ferguson gimmick was dropped almost immediately when some religious groups complain, and for once I can’t blame them. Not that I find it offensive, but man alive this was stupid.

Shaw would become his most famous character of Bastion Booger. We’ll pick things up on Raw, August 16, 1993.

Bastion Booger vs. Marty Jannetty

Booger is eating ice cream for some reason. Maybe because he’s hungry. For those of you that don’t remember, Bastion is a big fat guy that wears a diaper looking thing and eats anything. It was a very weird character that didn’t catch on and no one has any clue what the point of it was. The talk is mostly about Jannetty’s red, white and blue arm bands which brings on talk of Luger’s big Lex Express campaign.

Marty, for some reason that God alone knows, beats the living tar out of Bastion. He’s practically a jobber out there. It’s about a 3 minute match, not counting a commercial in between. For one of these minutes, we talk about Madonna’s birthday being today with random jokes about her. The commentary on here is filler.

Now I get the idea of having matches as fillers, but DANG man, I’ve never once heard of having commentary have to be nothing but filler as well. After Jannetty beats on him for a long time, we get back to the show and Jannetty goes for a sunset flip, Bastion stands there for a seconds, then starts waving his arms as he remembers to sell, but then Booger drops down with his finisher, but the referee just stops counting before the three to give Jannetty time to complete the move which gets the pin.

Rating: D. My goodness this made no sense. Marty is apparently being built up for his match at Summerslam with Ludvig Borga. They’re building up a jobber to be squashed by having him squash someone else? Good grief how low does that make Bastion? Literally, Booger had no offense at all and this was a waste of time.

We’ll wrap it up with “comedy” from Survivor Series 1993.

Team Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Four Doinks

Bam Bam Bigelow, Bastion Booger, Headshrinkers

Bushwhackers, Men on a Mission

Ok. I can get through this. Four years ago I stopped watching this midway through but I’m going to get through it this time. The Doinks are all dressed like a clown and their identities were secret until they were unveiled here. Luke comes out on a scooter, Butch has a wagon, the Men on a Mission come out on foot. Mabel needs the exercise so that’s a good idea. Notice that there’s no actual Doink in the match and the fans aren’t going to be pleased here.

A LOUD We Want Doink chant starts up and Bastion and Luke start things off. Booger is a VERY fat guy in a too small singlet in case you’re not familiar with him. Luke bites him on the ample singlet before stomping on Bastion’s foot. Afa bites Butch’s balloon and it’s off to Samu. Then he bites a water balloon and gets rolled up by Luke for the pin. Fatu (Rikishi) comes in and Luke hurts his own head off a headbutt attempt.

Booger comes in and drops a leg on Luke and it’s off to Bigelow with a headbutt to the ribs. Booger comes back in and sits on Luke before stopping for a banana. Another drop by Bastion misses and the Battering Ram puts him down. Mabel drops a leg on Bastion and it’s 4-2. Fatu comes in to offer meat to Luke and takes over, but here’s Mo on a scooter for a ride around the ring. Bigelow comes in and destroys the scooter and Fatu hits the top rope splash….and stops for a banana.

Butch comes in with a bucket of something….scratch that as there’s nothing in it, but Fatu slips on a banana peel as he jumps from it and Butch rolls him up for the pin. Bigelow is all that’s left and he gets to fight Mabel. Bam Bam can’t do anything to the power of fat but Mabel misses a splash. The other Doinks come in and get beaten up also but Butch throws something on Luna. Mabel splashes Bigelow and a dog pile (which is allowed) gets the pin.

Rating: Awe. I am in awe. We had falls from a water balloon, a banana peel and a bucket of something being thrown on Luna. There’s nothing else I can say about that and I’m not going to try.

Mike Shaw is a good example of a guy there they just tried too hard. He was by far his most effective as a monster like Singh but then he had so many gimmicks that made him look like a goof when he was more than capable of being a midcard monster. There weren’t many great or even good matches on his resume but he could have something watchable when he had the right opponent.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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