Wrestler of the Day – October 1: Hawk

Today we’re going to look at a bird man other than Koko B. Ware: Hawk.

I’ll be skipping LOD tag matches for this one, meaning expect some big gaps.

Hawk got his start in 1983 but as far as I know, he didn’t have any singles matches until several years into his career. We’ll start things off at Great American Bash 1987 and yes, I’m considering matches where he and Hawk are on the same team with other people to not be Road Warriors matches. If not, this would be about three matches.

Dusty Rhodes/Road Warriors/Nikita Koloff/Paul Ellering vs. Four Horsemen/JJ Dillon

The Horsemen in this case are Flair, Anderson, Blanchard, Luger and JJ Dillon. Flair’s music is epic as they crank the music WAY up. This is the Atlanta main event and it’s the debut of WarGames. For those of you uninitiated, WarGames is the mother of all gimmick matches. You have two teams of five and each team sends in a member. Those two fight for five minutes and there’s a coin toss.

The winning team gets to send in the third man to have a 2-1 advantage. That lasts two minutes and then the team that lost the toss gets to send in its second man to tie it at 2-2. That lasts two minutes then the team that won the toss sends in its third man. You alternate like that every two minutes until it’s 5-5 and then it’s first submission. No pins allowed.

Arn and Dusty start us off and remember this can’t end until all ten are in. There are two rings side by side with one huge cage over them if I didn’t mention that. They feel each other out a lot as they’re not entirely sure what to do here. Dusty walks on the second rope and then swings across the top of the cage to kick him in the ribs. Now they’re going and Dusty pounds away including a low blow which is perfectly legal.

There’s a DDT by Dusty and the crowd is red hot. Arn is cut open about two and a half minutes in so Dusty rakes it across the cage wall. Everyone hates everyone on the other team so this is a huge blood feud all around. Dusty sends him into the cage and has dominated the entire time. After a quick comeback by Arn Dusty gets his bad Figure Four on and then lets go of it because….well just because I guess.

The Horsemen win the toss (the faces literally never won the thing) and it’s Tully in next. The Horsemen beat him down but Dusty is booking so he knocks them both down with elbows. And scratch that as Tully gets in a knee shot and the double teaming begins. Tully puts on a Figure Four as they work over the knee. The clock seems to skip ahead a bit (no sign of clipping though) and Animal comes in to tie it up.

He starts launching Horsemen everywhere and sets Tully up for a slingshot which he rams three straight times. Shoulder block takes Tully down and Dusty destroys Anderson. I think Blanchard is busted and he gets double teamed a bit. Anderson looks dead. Animal is like screw that and rams him into the cage a few times. Flair is in to make it 3-2 and chops at Animal which doesn’t work. The number catch up with him as Anderson is back up quickly.

Sorry for a lot of play by play here but it’s the only thing you can do in matches like this one. Animal is busted. Dusty tries to fight back but he’s almost on his own. The fans are so loud that you can’t hear Tony and Jim. Dusty is bleeding and here comes Nikita. Flair grabs him as he comes in but the power of RUSSIA breaks up the Horsemen. The double ring thing here is very nice as they have room to move around. Animal sends Flair into the cage and he’s bleeding now. Dusty is gushing blood.

Nikita and Dusty work on the knee of Anderson but Nikita goes to get Tully stuck between the two rings and hits him between the ropes in a slingshot thing. Flair begs off Nikita and that doesn’t end well for the champ. A double dropkick puts Anderson down and here’s Lex. This is literally non-stop. Powerslam plants Koloff and Lex is dominating. There’s a spike piledriver to Nikita and then a second one just to kill him deader than dead. The Horsemen are in control but they’re starting to fall from exhaustion and blood loss.

Here’s Hawk and the fans erupt all over again. He destroys everything in sight and if you’re not bleeding already you will be now. Nikita’s neck is messed up and he can barely stand. JR is in Heaven with this much carnage. Flair gets a Figure Four on Dusty but it doesn’t count yet. The Horsemen only have JJ Dillon left and he’s a manger. He goes after Hawk and that’s just dumb.

Flair saves JJ’s life and they’re getting tired. Flair is bleeding a ton as if you expected anything else. JJ is taking a beating but Animal is getting triple teamed. Here’s Ellering to get us all tied up and now the match can end. Ellering has an LOD spiked pad on his arm. Dillon is bleeding BAD so Ellering JAMS THE SPIKE INTO HIS EYE. The LOD circles in on Dillon as the rest of the team runs interference. The Warriors spear his head into the cage and load up the Doomsday Device. JJ lands on his shoulder, legitimately hurting it. With Animal running interference, Hawk beats him half to death until he gives up to finally end this.

Rating: A+. This runs 26 minutes and there is literally no stopping in the whole thing. There isn’t some period where they chill because they’ve done enough. This is about brutality and violence and it works very well. There’s a ton of blood and JJ looks like he fell out of a building (for some reason in wrestling attire) at the end of it. It’s well worth seeing and still works today. Great match.

On to a rare singles match with Hawk challenging for the World Title at Bunkhouse Stampede.

NWA World Title: Ric Flair vs. Hawk

Ok, Hawk coming out to Ozzy and Iron Man….is one of the coolest things I’ve ever seen. It’s PERFECT for that team and worked really well. Flair is of course Flair and since it’s early 88, this should be good because he’s in it. People like talking about Shawn having great matches in the mid 90s, but Flair in the late 80s was able to take guys like Hawk and get good matches out of him. Let’s see if that’s the case here.

Wow it’s awesome seeing Dillon with Flair. Dang the Big Gold Belt looks right on Flair. At the same time though, Hawk fighting for the world title? Really? Naturally, Flair can’t hurt him. Hawk…really can’t do much. That’s the only way to put it. He can’t do much. For the most part this is just Flair bumping like a mad man for Hawk to make him look believable. Ah and there’s a bearhug. At least that’s something you would expect. This has been ALL Hawk.

Ross says some of Flair’s chops are karate or judo chops. There’s something amusing about that. Hawk kicks him in the face which looked painful. He no sells an eye rake. Seriously? No selling an eye rake? Flair goes to his old standby, a low blow, to break things up. Why not use what works? They talk about how great Flair is. Isn’t that the truth? He’s fighting HAWK and we’re getting an ok match out of it. Let that sink in a bit.

Hawk hits his one offensive move, the neckbreaker, to pull things to even for a few seconds. Flair goes for the knee and hooks the Figure Four as we’re in pure 80s Flair formula. Think about it: how many times have you seen Flair do the following match? Flair gets beaten down by the face for awhile, Flair gets a shot, usually cheating, to take over, Flair does general offense before circling in on the knee, Figure Four, Figure Four is reversed, face makes the comeback, face is seconds away from his finisher, something goes wrong, Flair puts his feet on the ropes for the pin, or there’s a DQ.

See what I mean? It happens all the time and that for the most part is the Flair Formula. The thing is, while he did it so many times, he had VERY good matches because of it. He gets slammed off the top since it’s a Flair match, and here comes Hawk. And down goes the referee. Hawk clotheslines Flair over the ropes, which I’d bet is a DQ later on.

Hawk has been spent for about 10 minutes now. Hawk gets a top rope suplex and there’s STILL no referee. JJ pops him with a chair for no reaction at the 20 minute mark. Flair hits him with it and Hawk kicks out of that as the referee is finally back up. Flair hits him with the chair again for the cheap DQ. He gets beaten up again after the match.

Rating: C-. To say Flair carried this is an understatement. Hawk was nothing but a placeholder here as Flair did his thing out there. It came off ok but ONLY due to Flair. He plugged Hawk into his formula and sold like the master that he is out there. By FAR and away the best match of the night so far.

Here’s a six man from the first Clash of the Champions.

Road Warriors/Dusty Rhodes vs. Powers of Pain/Ivan Koloff

Koloff and the Powers of Pain are the Six Man Tag Team Champions but the titles aren’t on the line here. This is a barbed wire street fight. Animal (teaming with his regular partner Hawk and Dusty) had his face injured by the Powers (Warlord and Barbarian) and Koloff while doing a weightlifting demonstration so tonight is about revenge. The barbed wire is around the ropes and while it’s not the at the level you might expect today, this was a BIG deal back in 1988.

The heels finally crawl under the ropes but Animal chases Warlord out to the floor to send him into the post. Most of the guys stay clear of the barbed wire and fight in the middle of the ring. Ivan and Dusty send each other into the wire and draw blood but Dusty comes back with right hands to Warlord and a big DDT to Barbarian. Hawk comes off the top with a right hand that mostly misses Warlord before Dusty kicks Barbarian to the floor. Animal powerslams Warlord and Barbarian’s top rope headbutt hits his partner by mistake, giving Animal the pin and revenge.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t much to see but the barbed wire was a nice touch, even though it wasn’t used all that much. It probably is better that they kept this match short and energetic as none of the six guys were known for their stamina. The Powers of Pain would jump to the WWF less than two months later so this was the blowoff to the feud.

Here’s a one off match that needs a long explanation. From Great American Bash 1988.

Road Warriors/Ronnie Garvin/Jimmy Garvin/Steve Williams vs. Kevin Sullivan/Mike Rotundo/Russian Assassin/Ivan Koloff/Al Perez

This is the Tower of Doom match. Sooo…..how in the world do I go about explaining this one? This was a one off concept (thank goodness) that is kind of like WarGames meets Doomsday Cage (Uncensored 96) meets Triple Cage (Slamboree 2000). You have three cages: one is a taller version of a regular cage. Above that you have a smaller cage and above that you have a cage that at most two people could fit in at once.

The idea here is every two minutes, each team sends in a man. Now the logical thing would be to put them in at the bottom, but instead they’re starting at the top via huge extended ladders. The idea is you have to climb down the cage and out the door. The catch is that Jimmy Garvin’s chick Precious is in the bottom cage and has the keys.

The entire point to this match is that Sullivan wants Precious who keeps turning him down. I’m not sure if it’s been introduced yet or not, but there was something about papers he had that she didn’t want being seen and he called her Patti as if he had known her before so maybe they were married before or something but the whole insane story was dropped with no explanation after Garvin got hurt and Precious, his real wife, left wrestling. That’s wrestling for you though.

The rest of the people aren’t there for any particular reason. The Varsity Club and the Road Warriors were feuding I think but they were more there as heavies. Williams would join the Club soon after this and end that run. Ronnie is there because he’s part of Garvin’s family. They stand around forever to wait on everything to be secured.

Ivan Koloff vs. Ronnie Garvin to start in a clash of former world champions. Keep in mind they’re up there by the lights so the fans can’t see a thing. Rotunda is up there already (not in the cage but waiting outside of it) along with Williams to go in next. There’s no room for anyone to do anything up there so it’s really boring to start. After two minutes the trap door will open but it’s only for ten seconds so there’s a chance of having a 2-1 situation.

Garvin and Koloff chop each other a lot and the cage shakes. I’m scared of heights so this is terrifying for me. We randomly cut to a not very hot chick in the crowd as the horn goes off for the two minute interval. The door is open for like 40 seconds as Garvin goes through and there’s some powder thrown. Ok so Garvin is in the second cage by himself and has to wait there now. Williams is getting beaten down 2-1 and Animal and I think that’s Perez who are coming in next.

Williams fights both guys off as the cage keeps shaking. I need some Tums. The horn goes off and Garvin gets down to the regular cage, Williams and Koloff get into the middle cage and it’s Animal vs. Rotundo and Perez on top. Precious lets Garvin out so it’s officially 1-0 Team Garvin but 3-2 in the cage itself. Hawk and the Assassin are up next but not quite yet. Animal takes over on the heels and the fans actually get into it.

Koloff gets beaten down also and there’s the horn. Perez makes it to the middle cage as does Animal. No one makes it to the bottom cage so it’s Animal, Koloff, Williams and Perez in the middle while Rotundo, Hawk and the Assassin are up top. Jimmy Garvin and Sullivan who are more or less the captains are left. Williams slams Koloff and JR is practically in the cage to suck him off for it.

Another horn goes off and it’s Perez and Animal in the bottom cage, Koloff, Hawk, Assassin and Williams in the middle and Rotundo, Jimmy and Sullivan up top. Now remember that just because all 10 are in, it doesn’t mean the horn thing ends because the trap doors aren’t staying open. Animal escapes to the floor and Williams puts Koloff in a Figure Four. Ross is saying how intense and insane it is and while it’s overkill, this is still pretty nuts.

There’s a horn and Rotundo finally makes it out of the top. Assassin makes it to the floor as is Koloff. Perez makes it out to the floor. Hawk comes down to the bottom and is in a handicap with the Russians. Ok so the Russians and Road Warriors are feuding. That’s why they’re in this. Hawk takes them both down with a clothesline while Garvin and Sullivan fight up top. Williams vs. Rotundo is going on in the middle. I’ll give them this: they’re staying on a wide shot at least some of the time and you can see most of everything which is a nice touch.

Precious is still in the bottom cage remember. Hawk escapes, but that leaves it 4-2 (Jimmy/Williams vs. Russians/Sullivan/Rotundo). Williams makes it to the final cage but Garvin and Sullivan don’t care about moving but eventually go down. Williams and the Russians escape so we’re left with Rotundo/Sullivan vs. Jimmy Garvin, who thankfully isn’t in those small white trunks anymore.

The horn goes off and Rotundo gets out of the entire cage while Garvin vs. Sullivan are left in the middle. A big brawl breaks out on the floor with the other 8 guys because Garvin vs. Sullivan is pretty boring without Precious involved. Garvin works on the leg a bit and then they slug it out. The horn goes off and they both go down to the bottom and Sullivan goes right for Precious who kicks him away for Jimmy to save her. Garvin works on the knee some more and hits his brainbuster finisher but can’t get the door unlocked. Sullivan gets up and shoves Garvin out to give Team Jimmy the win.

Rating: D. The match is a total mess, but by comparison to something like the Doomsday Cage Match, this is a masterpiece. It makes almost no sense but at least once you get into the match you can follow it. There’s one really stupid part which we’ll get to here in just a second if you haven’t figured it out already. It should have been WarGames, but this isn’t a total disaster I guess.

Now we get to the big problem: since Garvin was thrown out, Precious is locked inside with the man that wants to either rape and/or murder her. Yeah they didn’t really think that one all the way through did they? Sullivan drops to his hands and knees and crawls over to her as Jimmy and Hawk try to climb up the ladders for the rescue. Sullivan gets her jacket off and pulls a rope or chain out of his trunks and chokes away until Hawk FINALLY comes in to half kill Sullivan with a clothesline. Garvin gets Precious out as you have to wonder why in the world the Garvins EVER agreed to let her be in there in the first place.

Oh and one other thing about it that makes it more bearable than the Doomsday match: YOU COULD SEE IT. They were in the middle of the arena and it was well lit. Why that was such a stretch for 96 is beyond me.

Back in the day there were Six Man Tag Team Titles. Here they are on the line at Clash of the Champions V.

Six Man Tag Team Titles: Genichiro Tenryu/Road Warriors vs. Sting/Michael Hayes/Junkyard Dog

The challengers are still locked in a cage and since there are apparently no bolt cutters in the building, the Varsity Club hits the ring to take their spot. There’s actually a story here as the Varsity Club will be facing the Road Warriors for the Warriors’ World Tag Team Titles at the PPV.

Six Man Tag Team Titles: Genichiro Tenryu/Road Warriors vs. Varsity Club

A big brawl gets us started with Williams running Tenryu over with a clothesline but walking into a big boot. The Warriors and Tenryu are supposed to be heels here but the fans just won’t stop cheering Hawk and Animal. Tenryu knocks Rotunda into the corner as the cage door in the back still can’t be opened.

Williams gets run over by a clothesline from Hawk as some bolt cutters are FINALLY brought in to open the door. Animal gets caught in the corner and the Club works on his arm before throwing Animal over the top and out to the floor. Back in and Animal rams heads with Sullivan but the referee misses the hot tag to Hawk. Not that it matters as Sting, Hayes and JYD run in for the double DQ and a big brawl.

Rating: D. The match was barely anything at all as we were just waiting for the big run-in. The Road Warriors were practically faces at this point and were wrestling as such. Tenryu was really just a warm body teaming with them, but again it didn’t really matter as the NWA realized the Six Man Titles were worthless and dropped them almost immediately after this.

We need more WarGames. From Great American Bash 1989, one of the best shows ever.

WarGames: Freebirds/Samoan Swat Team vs. Road Warriors/Midnight Express/Steve Williams

In case you don’t know the rules: two guys start for five minutes and then we have a coin toss (the heels will win) and the winning team gets to send in another man for a two on one advantage. This lasts for two minutes until the losing team gets to tie it up at two. After two minutes the winning team goes up three to two. You alternate every two minutes until everyone is in there and when everyone is in there, it’s first submission wins it. No pins.

Eaton vs. Garvin starts us off. Williams is still in his Hogan attire here which makes me laugh. As JR puts it, it’s Beautiful vs. Gorgeous in WarGames which got a chuckle out of me. Garvin controls early but it’s not like it means anything. The Freebirds beat the Express in a tournament final to win the world tag titles so there’s your explanation for this part of the feud. This is more or less back and forth with nothing really to report on.

Dangerously, the Samoans’ manager, says that Hayes will be next about 10 times. Eaton controls for the most part and works on the back of the mullet-tastic Garvin before throwing on a Boston Crab. After Dangerously shouts about Hayes being in next, Terry Gordy comes in next. That’s another great example of a great heel manager. He didn’t accomplish anything but he lied BECAUSE HE COULD. So simple yet so effective.

Gordy comes in and it goes badly for Eaton to put it mildly. Garvin has a glove and tape or something or his hand so this is mainly punching and stomping. He eats a lot of cage too as Garvin is mostly fine. Apparently Eaton failed in his mission to hurt him. Williams comes in to even things up and in one of the most mind blowing spot I’ve ever seen, he picks up Gordy, who is probably 290 at the least, and gorilla presses him EIGHT times into the cage. Just insane.

After some more choking the heels get us back to about even for Samu to come in as Eaton is more or less dead. Double fishhook on him by Garvin which is painful looking. Everyone is in one ring and they need to spread it out a bit. Eacon somehow gets back up and holds the heels off a bit until Animal ties it up again. Again they’re all in the same ring and it’s WAY too crowded in there.

Ah there we go as he and Samu head to the other ring. Much better. They hate each other because of a big beatdown the Samoans gave the Road Warriors and then they beat up Ellering, the Road Warriors’ manager. The Warriors cost the Samoans a spot in the finals of the tag tournament, which brings us here. Animal just destroys everyone as Fatu will be in next.

All six in the same ring still and it’s just stupid. There’s (Rikishi) Fatu to make it 4-3. The Samoans beat down Animal as Williams and Gordy are in the other ring now to space things out a bit. Eaton and Garvin are still fighting and here comes Stan Lane to even it up at four apiece again. That leaves Hayes and Hawk as the last two. The Samoans eat metal as Lane cleans house.

Dangerously to Hayes: Ok so when you go in you go over here. Hayes: I GOTTA GO IN???” Dangerously: There’s no one left! Hayes: Dang . Funny stuff. There are 9 people in the match and 9 are in the same ring. Hayes DDTs everyone to take out the faces and then goes off into the other ring to taunt Hawk. The fans want Hawk with one minute left. Hayes drops Eaton with a hard left and here’s the bird man.

Now it’s first submission wins. Hawk cleans house as it is on in a big way. The faces are dominating here as was the custom in WarGames once everyone got in. Dangerously tries to force the phone through the cage and turns around to see a referee with his arms folded looking at him. I need some wawa music there.

Mainly just punching now with nothing of note as far as flow or anything but that’s a good thing here as there isn’t supposed to be anything remotely resembling order. Look at the first name of the match: WAR. Doomsday Device on Gordy is blocked so Hawk kills Garvin with a clothesline and works on his neck, throwing on a hangman (Hawk grabs Garvin for a reverse neckbreaker and lifts him onto his back in a neck crank/choke) which gets the submission to end it.

Rating: B+. Very solid battle in there which was exactly what this was supposed to be. It’s not a classic or one of the best ever but this was quite good for the point of blowing this feud completely off and have all the feuds in there at once. This was effective for what it was supposed to be and the match was as fun as ever. Good match.

Hawk would head to the WWF in early 1990, but it’s not that easy to find anything other than tag matches. There are only two that I know of that isn’t a Royal Rumble. From Survivor Series 1990.

The Warriors vs. The Perfect Team

Ultimate Warrior, Texas Tornado, Legion of Doom

Mr. Perfect, Demolition

I guess this team isn’t as Ultimate as last year. This is the three man version of Demolition. Perfect is feuding with Tornado (Kerry Von Erich, the IC Champion) and the LOD is feuding with Demolition after the LOD cost them the titles. Warrior, the world champion, is there because he has nothing else to do. His team is in the back before the match and says they’ll win. Actually the name Warriors is appropriate as you have the Ultimate Warrior, the Modern Day Warrior (Von Erich’s nickname in WCCW) and the Road Warriors (the LOD’s NWA name).

I’ll never get why the LOD and Demolition never had a big proper match. They fought on house shows but that’s about it. Perfect immediately goes to the apron and lets part of Demolition start. It’s Animal vs. Smash first and they fight immediately with Animal taking him to the mat. Animal throws him into Hawk for a right hand and the other Warriors get in a shot as well.

Smash comes back with a powerslam for two and it’s off to Perfect. That doesn’t last long so here’s Smash again, and he walks right into a powerslam. Everything breaks down and the Warriors clear the ring. Tornado comes in to face Smash who is taking a beating in this so far. Off to Ax who has much better luck for about ten seconds. There’s the Claw from Tornado but for some reason Warrior gets the tag and hits a series of awkward looking shoulder blocks before finishing Ax with the splash.

Crush immediately comes in to jump Warrior and take over. Smash comes in to slam Warrior and Crush drops a top rope knee for two. Perfect is freaking out in his trademark over the top style. Warrior gets up a boot in the corner and clotheslines Crush down. Off to Hawk who always looks like he could murder someone in the ring. Perfect tries him out and is immediately slammed down.

Hawk counters a reversal to send Perfect into the corner but Bird Man’s shoulder goes into the post HARD to give the evil ones the advantage. Demolition pounds away on him but Hawk punches right back. A big flying shoulder puts Smash down and Hawk doesn’t tag when he has the chance. The top rope clothesline kills Smash and everything breaks down. Hawk kicks the referee and somehow this disqualifies Hawk, Animal, Smash and Crush. We’re down to Perfect vs. Warrior/Tornado.

It’s going to be Warrior starting the handicap match but Perfect wants Tornado instead. Perfect immediately jumps him and is clotheslined out almost immediately after the jumping. Warrior bangs Perfect’s head into Heenan’s and sends Bobby into the front row. Tornado charges at Perfect and slams into the post to give Perfect the advantage for a bit. A buckle gets exposed somewhere in there and after Tornado’s face goes into it, the Perfectplex makes it one on one.

Perfect tries the Plex again on Warrior which doesn’t work at all. Instead he hammers Warrior down and hits a great looking dropkick for two. Having Perfect run things out there for as long as possible is the best idea they’ve got. Warrior starts grabbing the ropes and shrugging off all the offense from Perfect. A shoulder block and the splash get the final pin.

Rating: D. This was probably the worst Survivor Series match so far in the four years they’ve been running this show. Not only was the match lopsided from the start, but half of the people in it were gone seven minutes in. Perfect never had a chance and Warrior had no reason to be in this match at all.

And the other from Survivor Series 1991.

Legion of Doom/Big Boss Man vs. IRS/Natural Disasters

This is your main event people. Let that sink in for a minute. The LOD are the tag champions and IRS and Boss Man are having a worthless midcard feud. Boss Man and IRS start things off with the tax dude (if you need help figuring out who that is you’re beyond my help) getting thrown all over the place. Off to Animal vs. Earthquake which fires the crowd up a bit.

They collide and Animal’s cross body is caught in a backbreaker in an impressive display of strength from Quake. Back to IRS to face Hawk with the latter working on the arm. Typhoon gets the tag, only to have IRS thrown at him by Hawk. Off to Earthquake who carries Hawk to the heel corner. IRS and Boss Man come in again and it’s a briefcase shot to Boss Man’s head for the elimination.

It’s Typhoon vs. Animal now and the Disasters double team Animal in the corner. Quake suplexes him down as Monsoon talks about Bobo Brazil. IRS hits a top rope right hand for two and Typhoon puts on a bearhug. Animal escapes and hits a clothesline before tagging in Hawk. IRS misses a briefcase shot to the head and hits Typhoon by mistake, giving Hawk the easy pin.

Quake wants to fight IRS now but walks off with Typhoon instead, making it the LOD vs. IRS. Hawk powerslams IRS down but a charge goes shoulder first into the post. Hawk gets sent face first into the steps as we continue to fill time by having IRS look like he has a chance. We hit the chinlock as the announcers talk about Thanksgiving dinner. Not hot tag brings in Animal who cleans whatever is left in the house. IRS tries to walk out but runs into Boss Man in the aisle. Hawk hits a top rope clothesline for the win.

Rating: D+. We go from Hogan vs. Andre II to this in five years? That should give you a good idea as to what you’ve got going on with this show. The match was nothing and there was no reason to get excited about it, because the whole reason the match was happening had been postponed to Tuesday. In Texas.

After leaving the WWF and going insane, Hawk would pop up in ECW for a few matches, including this one on ECW TV on March 8, 1993.

Pitbull vs. Hawk

Pitbull (Gary Wolfe) has Jason in his corner. A loud LOD chant gets things going and Hawk starts by running him over with a shoulder block. There’s a gutwrench suplex and fist drop for two on Pitbull. Hawk gets nailed by a kick to the head but runs Pitbull over with a clothesline. Another clothesline from the top rope is enough to finish squashing Pitbull.

It was back to WCW at this point but only as Hawk instead of part of the Road Warriors. Here’s one of his first matches back at Clash of the Champions XXIV.

Rick Rude/Equalizer vs. Dustin Rhodes/???

Rude and Dustin are still fighting over the vacant title. The Equalizer is a big guy without much of a gimmick who would later be Kevin Sullivan’s dyslexic brother Evad. Dustin had been promising a mystery partner who would be driving the car that Tony and Jesse were talking about earlier tonight. The car comes in and Road Warrior Animal gets out. Rude says hang on because he knew Animal would be the partner. As he talks, Hawk gets on the apron behind them and Animal says THAT’S the partner.

Rude and Hawk get things going with Rick being LAUNCHED across the ring. Hawk wants a test of strength but Rude is very cautious. Rude is easily taken down by Hawk’s grip and it’s off to the Neutralizer, only to have Hawk dropkick him out to the floor. Back in and Hawk runs into a boot in the corner before it’s back to Rude for a camel clutch. Hawk just stands up and lifts Rude onto his shoulders so Dustin can come in with the clothesline for a Doomsday Device. A huge backdrop puts Rick down but Rude explodes out of the corner with a clothesline.

Dustin gets dropped by a top rope shot to the head and it’s back to Equalizer so Rude can choke from the floor. Back to Rude for some shots to the throat but Equalizer accidentally clotheslines his partner down. A tag brings in Hawk but the referee didn’t see it. Hawk doesn’t seem to mind as everything breaks down as Hawk cleans house. Equalizer picks up Dustin for a slam but Hawk knocks them down to give Rhodes the pin.

Rating: D. This was pretty lame stuff with neither team being all that interesting. I’m not sure why you would want to have just one Road Warrior in there but that would be done quite often during this run. Dustin and Rude had been feuding over that vacant title for months now and the story was long past uninteresting. This was the worst match on a Clash in a good while.

Somehow that was enough for a World Title match at Clash of the Champions XXV.

WCW International World Heavyweight Title: Rick Rude vs. Hawk

Rude is of course defending. They stare each other down to start and Hawk shoves the champion into the corner. He does it a second time and that’s the only contact in the first minute and a half. Rick doesn’t want to try a test of strength as the stalling has almost hit three minutes now.

Rude finally hammers away to take over and goes after Hawk’s back with heavy forearms. He steps on Hawk’s hand and hits him in the throat but Hawk just glares at him. A backdrop and slam have the champion’s back in trouble and Hawk whips him across the ring. Rude grabs a backbreaker and goes up top, only to dive into Hawk’s boots. A clothesline puts Rude on the floor and Hawk follows him out where they brawl to a double countout.

Rating: D-. This was a waste of time as they stood around for three minutes, did about two minutes of punching and then had a double countout. It’s not interesting, it doesn’t make Rude look weak, Hawk does get anything out of it, and the whole thing feels like they had no idea what to do here and threw out whatever came to mind.

Hawk would be in the Battlebowl competition at the Battlebowl pay per view.

Hawk/Rip Rogers vs. Davey Boy Smith/Kole

Kole is Booker T and Rogers is basically the guy that made OVW mean something. He gets beaten up on the ramp by all three guys as no one liked him and he was a jobber. This basically starts off as Hawk vs. both guys as Davey starts for his team. They make sure we know they’re friends and here we go. They do a bunch of clean breaks and really don’t do much at all.

Test of strength is a standoff and Booker more or less demands a tag. Rogers has a fight with his jacket on the ramp as Booker comes in. I love the face Bulldog saying hey Hawk, I know you’re my friend but I’m going to let this other guy come in and beat on you for no apparent reason. Smith cheers for Hawk as he fights back. Booker with the Spinarooni about 5 years before that had a name.

Rogers finally gets up and Booker smacks him down. Yet again there’s a mini story here but the match isn’t much. You know Rogers’ team is going to win here so why even bother with the false pretense? We hit the chinlock as Smith cheers on Hawk again. And just as I expected, Hawk picks up Rogers and throws him at Booker who can’t kick out for the pin. This would be like Santino getting there.

Rating: D. It’s another comedy match with nothing at all happening as Hawk and Smith wouldn’t fight each other and Rogers was in the match all of 9 seconds. This show just needs to end now as this was just another 8 minute match with a stupid ending. At least it was just 8 minutes I guess.

Time for a “dream team” to get a Tag Team Title shot at Starrcade 1993.

Tag Titles: Sting/Hawk vs. Nasty Boys

The Nasties (Brian Knobs and Jerry Sags) are the champions and this was initially going to be Ricky Steamboat/Ric Flair, but again the card had to be changed due to the Sid issue. The champions also have Missy Hyatt as their manager here. Hawk and Sting stand in the ring while the champions stall on the outside. We stall a lot before we get going with Sting vs. Knobs. Actually scratch the get going part as Brian stalls even more. They finally lock up with Sting armdragging him down, leading to more stalling.

Sting shrugs off a ram into the corner and drops an elbow before knocking Jerry out to the floor as well. Hawk comes in and picks up Sting, throwing him over the top and out to the floor onto the Nasties. Now it’s legally off to Hawk vs. Jerry with Hawk growling Jerry down. Jerry pounds him in the corner but Hawk will have none of it and chops Sags down. Off to Knobs but the Nasties bail to the floor again. Back in and Hawk pounds on Jerry before hitting a running shoulder, sending Jerry back to the floor again. This is more dull stuff so far.

Back in and Hawk hits an enziguri of all things and it’s off to Sting for a suplex. The challengers start working on the arm as it seems we’re in for a long match tonight. Sting cranks on an armbar before it’s back to Hawk, only to have him miss a charge into the corner and slam his shoulder into the post. Jerry blasts him in the back with a chair which doesn’t draw a DQ for no apparent reason. Missy gets in a slap as well before it’s back in to work on Hawk’s arm (wing?) for a bit.

After a leg drop gets two for Knobs it’s off to an armbar. Now Sags comes in for a cross armbreaker but Hawk pretty easily turns it over. Knobs hooks a Fujiwara Armbar as the match continues to drag along. Hawk fights up and knocks down both champions before making the hot tag to Sting. Another double clothesline puts the Nasties down as we hit fifteen minutes into the match. We get down to Sting vs. Knobs but Jerry tries to interfere, only to hit his partner by mistake.

The Nasties try to walk out but Sting and Hawk send them back inside. Well that was rather pointless. Sting tries a top rope splash but hits Knobs’ knees. Knobs tries a middle rope legdrop but just lands on Sting instead in a painful looking move. Sting is sent to the floor and clotheslined down by Sags as this match is getting FAR more time than it has any right to have. Back in and Jerry hooks an abdominal stretch until Hawk makes the save. Now, for a change of pace, Knobs comes in with an abdominal stretch of his own as we hit twenty minutes out of the thirty minute time limit.

Sting finally fights out but Sags breaks up a hot tag attempt to Hawk. Sags struggles to pick him up for a pumphandle slam and Brian puts on a lame rear chinlock. Hawk finally comes in and breaks it up out of boredom. Off to yet another abdominal stretch but Sting reverses with five minutes left. Sags breaks up another hot tag and Knobs hits a middle rope splash.

A middle rope elbow connects as well, but the second attempt at a splash hits Sting’s boot. Hawk finally comes in to break up the Nasties’ finisher and there’s the hot tag. Hawk cleans house as everything breaks down. Sting hits the Stinger Splash on Brian and rolls him up for two before putting Knobs on his shoulders for a Doomsday Device, only to have Missy Hyatt break up the pin for the DQ.

Rating: F. We sat through half an hour for that lame of an ending? This was WAY too long with way too much laying around as the Nasties were simply not capable of surviving a half hour long match. Sting and Hawk weren’t the best choice for challengers either but the fans reacted well to them at first. This didn’t work at all for the most part.

And now, Hawk as a singles guy. From Slamboree 1995.

Meng vs. Hawk

There was zero transition here by the way. Penzer says he believes Meng is accompanied by Robert Parker. Never heard that before. Bischoff really needs to stop those long pauses in his talking. Heenan says this man is just a machine. Ok then. Hawk gets a freaking ROAR. Eric: “Here you’re getting a match that would be a main event match anyplace in the world.” WOW. Meng is dominating in this MAIN EVENT MATCH.

Hawk of course no sells a piledriver because that’s what he does. This has been pretty much all Meng at this point. Screw it I’m tired of being completely wrong on this timing thing. I love this sequence. Meng keeps using this complicated sequence of kicks and Hawk just hits him. There’s something awesome about that. Both guys are on the floor and I think I know what’s coming. Eric thinks it’s a Chicago Street Fight. Who cares if we’re in Florida? Yep I’m right: double count out.

Rating: F+. And that’s just because of that hitting sequence. This was really weak and apparently there’s bad blood now. Good to know I guess. Who thought it was a good idea to continue giving Hawk singles matches? I never got that and I don’t think WCW can explain it either. There are some teams that just belong together and the Road Warriors fits that description.

Here’s one of the most bizarre choices for a match I’ve ever seen. From Halloween Havoc 1995.

Kurasawa vs. Hawk

This was an odd choice. On Clash of the Champions, Kurasawa broke Hawk’s arm and this is the rematch. No one got this feud or why Hawk was wrestling singles matches or who in the world Kurasawa was other than a good filmmaker. Hawk jumps him like you would expect him to as we get going. Hawk gets his one wrestling move, the neckbreaker.

Crowd is into Hawk if nothing else. He even busts out a powerbomb and a gutwrench suplex. Total dominance here. Parker interferes so Kurasawa can take over. He misses a top rope elbow and Hawk takes over again. He was in trouble for MAYBE 4 seconds. Big old clothesline puts the heel on the floor.

On the floor Hawk is rammed into the post, taken into the ring, Kurasawa hits two Samoan Drops and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin. I have been reviewing shows for over a year now and I have NEVER seen a match that made less sense. This was never mentioned again. Hawk destroyed him until that ending. No sense at all.

Rating: WTF. I have nothing else to say for that. Hawk looked like he was beating up a jobber and he loses? No rating again but dude, what the heck were they thinking here? Why did Hawk have a singles match here anyway? WCW continues to boggle the mind and somehow it would get even worse. Kurasawa never did anything and only had a few more matches.

One last Battlebowl concept from Slamboree 1996.

Battlebowl First Round: Animal/Booker T vs. Hawk/Lex Luger

Love that Iron Man music. Dusty is excited. This was one of his bright ideas. Wow a tag team is fighting each other. What are the odds of that??? Luger is a face now in case you’re keeping track. If you are, I feel very sorry for you. Tony suggests 100 million people are watching this PPV broadcast and are listening in English. That’s most amusing.

Ok so the first round has 8 matches and then there’s ANOTHER round of tag matches. The winners of the second round of matches go to the battle royal. Ok then. Luger and Animal start us off. The commentary is somehow stupider than usual. Luger is a tag champion here along with Sting. Hawk hasn’t come in yet. Booker hits a Spinarooni which has no official name yet. Luger is TV Champion here too. Hawk and Luger get into it and we have the massive brawl, leading to a double countout. Hawk was never in the match.

Rating: D-. For these matches, I’m starting at a D rather than a C like I usually do. This was quick and boring if nothing else, but it gives me a very bad feeling about the rest of the show. You can also tell that they’re not even trying to hide the fact that these matches are scripted. At least try to make it look fake.

We’ll wrap it up with one more match in the WWF. Hawk would be one of four warm bodies that accompanied Steve Austin as he fought all of Canada at In Your House XVI.

Hart Foundation vs. Goldust/Legion of Doom/Ken Shamrock/Steve Austin

Most of the Americans are booed, but Austin is treated like a bunch of ants at a picnic. The Hart Foundation’s entrance on the other hand is a sight to behold, with each member getting a louder and louder ovation until Owen’s music stops. Bret’s reception is louder than everyone else’s and that’s before his music even comes on. The Harts are a unit, all clad in leather jackets and looking like they’re ready for war.

The match starts with the only possible combination of Austin vs. Bret. They slug it out with Bret taking over and pounding Austin down into the corner to send the crowd even further into a frenzy. Austin comes back with right hands and might as well be pummeling Santa Claus. Bret hits a headbutt and clothesline before raking Steve’s eyes across the top rope. Austin kicks Bret low to slow him down and stomps on him in the corner before slapping on the Million Dollar Dream. Hart climbs the ropes for a rollup for two, which is the same way he beat Austin at Survivor Series.

Bret drags Austin to the corner for a tag off to the raw power of Jim the Anvil Neidhart. Austin takes him down with a Thesz Press and right hands before bringing in Shamrock to easily kick Neidhart down. Pillman comes in to break up an ankle lock attempt so Shamrock takes Neidhart down with ease again. Brian comes in legally now to bite Shamrock’s face and fire off chops in the corner. A backbreaker puts Shamrock down again so Pillman grabs his hand and slaps the mat, claiming a submission victory in a funny bit.

Ken comes back with a nice belly to belly suplex and it’s off to Goldust vs. Owen. Goldust scores with a backdrop but Owen comes right back with an enziguri to take over again. The fans are all over Austin here, even though it’s Hawk in to beat Owen up. A top rope splash gets two but Hawk misses a dropkick, allowing Owen to put on a Sharpshooter. Anvil makes the save, only to have Bulldog come in with the delayed vertical suplex and the powerslam but Goldust makes a save.

Bret comes back in (crowd erupts) to face Animal and gets up a knee in the corner to slow Animal down. Off to Goldust who is immediately tied up in the Tree of Woe and quintuple teamed, drawing in the rest of the Americans for the save. Owen comes in legally but misses a charge into the post, allowing for the tag off to Animal. Owen is fine with that and hits an enziguri followed by a missile dropkick to fire up the crowd even more. Animal will have none of that and counters a hurricanrana into a powerbomb.

The Doomsday Device hits Owen but Anvil makes the save, drawing in all ten guys for a huge brawl. In the melee, Austin wraps Owen’s knee around the post and hits it with a chair before beating up Bret and Owen’s brother Bruce, who is sitting with the rest of the Hart Family in the crowd. Things calm down with Anvil vs. Austin as medics come out to check on Owen. Neidhart sends Austin into the corner for a big beating and Owen is being taken to the back.

Pillman comes in but gets dragged over to the American corner and taken down by a Stunner. Bret makes the save by wrapping Austin’s leg around the post and blasting it with a fire extinguisher. He throws on the Figure Four around the post until Hawk makes the save but the damage has been done to the leg. Austin is able to tag in Hawk but Bulldog crotches Hawk on the top rope to take him down again. Austin limps to the back again, leaving us with just four guys per team in the match.

Neidhart and Animal have a test of strength with Jim taking over and driving Animal into the Hart corner for a tag off to Bret. The original Hart Foundation (Bret and Neidhart) take over on Animal to give the crowd a nostalgia pop. Shamrock comes in again and grabs Bret’s leg but just stands there, allowing Pillman to sneak in with a clothesline. Shamrock grabs the leg again but Bret gives him a stern lecture from the mat, which actually makes Ken let him up. I wish I could make that up.

Bret sends Shamrock to the floor where Pillman throws him over the French announce table. Back inside and it’s Bulldog slugging Shamrock down in the corner to send the crowd right back into a frenzy. Ken hits him low, allowing Goldust to come in with a bulldog to the Bulldog, but Pillman breaks up the Curtain Call. Goldust goes up but gets crotched, allowing Bulldog to superplex him down.

Austin stumbles back out to the ring and it’s a double tag to bring in Bret vs. Stone Cold. Bret is sent chest first into the buckle and suplexed down for two, only to come back with a DDT. A backbreaker and the middle rope elbow are good for two and it’s off to a sleeper hold. Austin jawbreaks his way to freedom but has to have Animal save him from the Sharpshooter.

Now it’s Austin putting Bret in the Sharpshooter but Owen comes back out for the save. Owen comes in legally but gets clotheslined out to the floor and stomped against the barricade. Austin goes after the other Hart Brothers at ringside but Bret makes the save and sends Austin back inside so Owen can roll him up for the pin, sending the roof into orbit.

Rating: A+. Do I really need to explain this one? Not only is it a great match with everyone working very hard, but it’s a great story and the perfect way to blow off the feud. Austin could have been in there with any four guys, but the match ended perfectly and gave Owen a big rub in the process. Excellent match and the best multi-man tag match of all time.

As mentioned, Hawk was a part of a tag team that just did not work on its own. There’s nothing wrong with that as the LOD is the most dominant tag team ever and never quite worked as singles guys. Hawk basically wrestled as half of the team in his singles matches, which to be fair is all anyone wanted him to do. Well, other than be in the Legion of Doom. I was a huge fan of the team as a kid but man do some of these singles matches fall apart when he’s on his own.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – September 27: Doom

Today we have the longest reigning WCW Tag Team Champions of all time: Doom.

The team formed in late 1989 as Woman’s means of getting revenge on Rick Steiner for choosing Missy Hyatt. We’ll start at Halloween Havoc 1989.

Steiner Brothers vs. Doom

Doom is still in masks here and the Steiners throw them to the floor very quickly. Woman brought in Doom to fight the Steiners because she turned all evil and devilish. Scott clotheslines I think Simmons down and drops a knee for two. Doom bails to the floor again as the Steiners keep control. Off to Rick who takes Simmons (I’m guessing on these guys by the way) with a chinlock. Ross summarizes Rick in one statement. Rick has a new bulldog tattoo on his arm. JR: “Why didn’t you get a wolverine tattoo Rick?” Rick: “Because I wanted a dog.”

Scott comes in with a middle rope clothesline for two. This has been totally one sided so far. Simmons gets in what we would call a Stunner and it’s off to Reed. Back to Rick who gets beaten down for a few seconds but a knee lift is enough to bring in Scott. A quick gordbuster gets two for Scott and it’s off to Simmons again. This is Doom’s debut by the way. Simmons charges at him so Scott snaps behind him and kills Simmons with a German that would make Kurt Angle jealous.

Reed pops Scott in the head to slow him down and a double ax puts Scott down. Doom double teams a lot with stuff like a double elbow. Off to a chinlock by let’s say Simmons. Rick has finally had enough and tries to come in but that just lets Doom throw Scott out. Back in a sunset flip gets two for the Big Bad Booty Daddy. Neckbreaker gets two for Reed and he’s getting frustrated.

Simmons comes back in with a powerslam for two. Scott’s beating continues and a spike piledriver gets two so it’s back to the chinlock by let’s say Reed. Scott fights up and gets an elbow to bring in Rick. House is cleared and Scott is back up almost immediately with a Frankensteiner to I think Simmons. Woman gets up on the apron and in the distraction, she loads up Reed’s mask with something. A headbutt with that is enough for the pin on Rick and the huge upset.

Rating: D+. A boring match, but Doom wasn’t anything good yet. They would get MUCH better over the next few months and would go on to beat the Steiners for the world tag team titles, which would go on to be the longest reign in the history of the titles. There’s your trivia for the day. Bad match though, which is an odd result when you look at it on paper.

Time for a squash at Clash of the Champions IX.

Doom vs. Eddie Gilbert/Tommy Rich

Doom are large masked men whose identities will be revealed later, though it was hardly a secret. Woman had debuted them at Halloween Havoc to torment Rick Steiner for dropping her as a manager a few weeks before. Doom #1 easily tosses Gilbert off of a headlock so Eddie starts speeding things up before grabbing the arm. Off to Tommy who takes Doom #2 down with an armdrag but is quickly hammered against the ropes.

Back to Gilbert who tries to keep things moving but walks into a side slam from #1. Eddie is in quick trouble as #1 goes after the ribs with a gutbuster and some ax handles before it’s back to #2 for some shots to the head. #1 gets a near fall off a swinging neckbreaker but Gilbert rolls over to the corner for a tag. Rich speeds things up again and everything breaks down. Gilbert gets caught in a spinebuster/middle rope clothesline combination for the easy pin.

Rating: D+. More entertaining match than earlier as the power guys were better as heels than faces. Rich and Gilbert might as well have been two steaks for the monsters to eat and that’s the right move given how new Doom was as a team. They would get much better very soon though and this was just a preview.

Doom would enter the Iron Man Tournament at Starrcade 1989, meaning they had three matches.

Doom vs. Steiner Brothers

Again, ALL matches are tournament matches so there’s no point in listing them as such. Apparently the Samoans are replacing the injured Skyscrapers. Doom has Woman and her bodyguard Nitron with them here. Nitron is actually Tyler Mane, who you might know as Sabretooth from the X-Men movies. The Steiners are the World Tag Champions. Scott starts with Doom #2 (Reed) as there are A LOT of empty seats opposite the cameras. Scott hits a quick powerslam for two but charges into a boot in the corner.

A hard clothesline puts Reed down as Ross is already mixing up which Doom member is which. Off to Rick vs. Simmons with Rick hitting a quick suplex but barking instead of covering. Back to Reed who snapmares Rick down and pounds away before getting caught in a slam for a quick two count. Back to Scott for a headlock and an atomic drop as the announcers actually have to acknowledge the fact that the seats are so empty.

Scott takes Reed down and cranks on his leg before bringing Rick back inside. That goes nowhere so here’s Scott again for a backbreaker for a near fall. Scott misses a big clothesline and crashes out to the floor to give Doom their first advantage. Nitron gets in some shots of his own as Scott is in big trouble. Back in for a powerslam by Simmons for two before Reed comes in for some shots to the ribs.

Scott is sent back to the floor for another mugging as Rick keeps trying to make the save, only allowing Nitron and Reed to double team Scott. A double backdrop puts Scott down and there’s a whip spinebuster by Simmons for two. Doom hits a double back elbow and Scott is sent back to the floor again. Simmons suplexes Scott back inside but Scott falls on top for two.

A belly to belly suplex puts Simmons down and there’s the hot tag to Rick. Rick pounds away and hits a big old powerslam for two and Reed is knocked over the top and out to the floor. A HARD right hand puts Simmons down but Reed is back in for the save. Nitron trips up Rick but gets clotheslined down for his efforts. Everyone brawls to the floor and Rick dives in to beat the count for the win.

Rating: C. Not bad here but it was a pretty standard power vs. power match. I’m guessing the ending had to happen that way for the sake of the scoring but it’s, yet again, a pretty lame way to open up Starrcade. Doom would actually go on to beat the Steiners for the world tag team titles soon after this and hold them longer than any team in the history of WCW.

Doom vs. Road Warriors

Animal and Reed start things off and it’s as slow and plodding as you would expect two guys of this size to be. After a dropkick to Reed’s chest it’s off to Hawk for a wristlock. They collide a few times in the middle of the ring with Hawk finally taking him down via a clothesline. Off to Simmons (keep in mind that they’re not named that but it’s obvious which is which if you’ve seen them wrestle enough) who collides with Hawk several times. Hawk takes over again and it’s off to Animal who gets taken down by an elbow to the face.

It’s back to Hawk almost immediately for a missed charge, sending his shoulder HARD into the post. Simmons catapults Hawk’s throat into the bottom rope and it’s back to Reed who gets two off a powerslam. We hit the chinlock for a bit until a double back elbow takes down Hawk.

A middle rope elbow gets two for Reed as Woman talks trash from the floor. Back to the chinlock on Hawk as the time speeds up again. I haven’t noticed any clipping here so I’m guessing they’re just speeding things up to get through the matches faster. Hawk fights back with right hands and gets the tag off to Animal. A powerslam puts Reed on the mat as everything breaks down. Simmons tries a piledriver but Hawk comes off the top rope with a clothesline to give Animal the pin.

Rating: D. Not much to see here as we’re already reaching the problem with a tournament like this: we’ve already seen Doom twice and we get to see them again later on. It’s not interesting to watch them fight at this point given that they’re pretty much already eliminated from a math standpoint. Also it’s a bad sign when you have to bring math into a wrestling show but maybe that’s just personal taste.

Samoan Swat Team vs. Doom

The Samoans are Fatu (more famous as Rikishi) and Samoan Savage (more famous as Tama of the Islanders) and they have Oliver Humperdink as the Big Kahuna in their corner. Before the match, the Samoans and Kahuna do their tribal ceremony or whatever you want to call it. Reed and Savage get things going and unfortunately it’s the Samoan and not Randy. They collide in the middle and we get SAMOAN YELLING.

They collide again with no one going anywhere so it’s Reed pounding away at the ample midsection instead. Savage comes back with some kicks to the ribs of his own and it’s off to Fatu. The match continues to go slowly but to be fair this is Doom’s third appearance tonight. Simmons comes in and it’s a brawl again as he pounds on Fatu. Back to Reed for more pounding on the back followed by something resembling a spinebuster. A double back elbow gets two on Fatu off a blind tag and Doom is looking good for the first time tonight.

Reed sends Savage out to the floor and Simmons rams him into the barricade. The Samoans are called both the New Wild Samoans and the Samoan Swat Team but the latter is the better known of the names. Simmons comes in off a tag and gets caught in a sunset flip for two. A bulldog is countered by Savage but Reed breaks up a tag attempt to Fatu. Simmons hits a middle rope right hand to the head for two followed by a sloppy body slam. Reed goes up top but misses a middle rope shoulder as everything breaks down. Fatu headbutts Reed down for two but after they collide again, Fatu falls on Reed for the pin.

Rating: D. This was terrible as it was clear that Doom was totally spent. As mentioned, they would move on soon after this and win the tag titles, albeit with a new manager. This was a BAD styles clash as the Samoans were trying to match power with Doom and power vs. power rarely works for the most part. This didn’t go that well and we get two more Samoan matches tonight.

Here’s another shot at the titles with the masks on the line.

World Tag Team Titles: Doom vs. Steiner Brothers

This is titles vs. masks and Doom is now managed by Theodore R. Long instead of Woman. Scott brawls into the corner with Doom #1 to start and Scott is accused of pulling on the mask. Instead he comes back with a powerslam and rides #1 on the mat amateur style. #2 comes in to try his luck and hammers away on Scott’s chest. Scott comes back with a dropkick to both masked men, knocking them out to the floor. #2 is pulled back in and Scott goes after the mask to no avail.

Rick comes in to face #2 and bark a lot. #2 is whipped from corner to corner but again he gets away when his mask is threatened. Back inside and Rick hits a gorgeous overhead belly to belly and it’s back to #1 vs. Scott. #2 gets in a cheap shot from the apron to stop a charging Scott and Doom takes over. Choking and double teaming ensues with a double backdrop putting Scott down again. A big clothesline sends Scott over the top and out to the floor where #1 gets in a few cheap shots.

Back in and Scott gets a quick sunset flip for two but it seems to just tick Doom off even more. Scott grabs a Frankensteiner out of nowhere and the hot tag brings in Rick. He cleans house and gets #1’s mask off to reveal Butch Reed. Rick puts the mask on as Reed apologizes to his partner, allowing Rick to get a quick rollup for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was a standard formula tag team power match but not as fun as the previous match. It doesn’t help that there was no doubt about Doom’s identities as there were only two men in the organization that looked like them and one sounded exactly like Ron Simmons and the other wrestled exactly like Butch Reed.

The other Doom is unmasked to reveal Ron Simmons, shocking very few people.

Here’s their next shot at the titles at Capital Combat.

World Tag Titles: Doom vs. Steiner Brothers

DANG that Doom music is awesome. They’re Ron Simmons and Butch Reed if you’ve never heard of them. They’re just big bruisers that have nothing but power. The Steiners are about as awesome as possible at this point so this is going to be a war. Rick’s hair is insane here and looks awful but it was just past the 80s so it’s ok I guess. Also, this is the Scott Steiner that was supposed to be the wrestler of the 90s as he’s a freaking monster that can move like Chris Jericho.

We’re stalling a ton by this point. Long looks like Carl Winslow with his hair like that which is rather amusing. Scott and Simmons start us off and Steiner just shoves the referee to the ground for no apparent reason. No disqualification on that for no apparent reason. These two just hammer the tar out of each other with the crowd being white hot. Scott is throwing Simmons around. That’s hard to imagine.

And now let’s look at the fans for no apparent reason. Scott throws out a perfect dropkick and it’s ALL Scott so far. I’m having issues taking Rick seriously with that hair. Apparently Rick offered to take Jim Ross fishing one time. That could be hilarious. To say this has been physical would be an understatement. They’re beating the tar out of each other and we hear about Simmons being the MVP of the Hula Bowl. That kind of weakens things a bit.

It’s weird hearing about all these little factoids about Steiner, including that he loves animals. It’s also weird hearing him called Hacksaw Reed. I know it’s his name but I associate that nickname with Duggan and Duggan alone. Doom has taken over here as we calm things down a lot. Reed has Scott down and pounds him with right hands. Better than the Atomic Noogie I guess. Reed hooks a decent bulldog of all things.

This has been slower but good so far. Frankensteiner hits out of nowhere and the place is all of a sudden alive. I’ll give the Steiners this: they could get a crowd going. Doom hits a modified Hart Attack for a long two but Rick makes the save. In a different kind of ending, Rick is pounding on Reed in the corner and sets up for a belly to belly from the middle rope but Simmons makes a save.

Reed hits more or less a spinebuster out of the corner from the second rope for the titles. I like that ending which is like a theme tonight or something. Post match Long said he would do it and he was right. This would wind up being the longest tag title reign in WCW history as they would hold the titles until next February. Also, this was just below Sheamus beating Cena on the shock scale as while they were both big deals, the Steiners had been champions for nearly a year and were more or less unstoppable up to this point.

Rating: B+. Better than the previous one and another very good match. This has been a great show for tag wrestling as I thought it would be. This lived up to the hype of a very big showdown which is always a good thing. These two were both big time powerhouse teams and this worked very well. I liked it more than I should have but Doom is just awesome so there we are.

We need a squash. From May 5, 1990.

Doom vs. William Bell/Bob Cook

Ron runs Bell over to start and Doom drops him with a double back elbow. Reed comes in with a heavy clothesline and some rapid fire elbow drops. A middle rope elbow gets two with Butch pulling himself up. Reed lifts Cook up and Simmons adds a top rope shoulder for the pin.

Rating: D+. I think you get the idea here.

The Steiners got a rematch at Clash of the Champions XI.

World Tag Team Titles: Doom vs. Steiner Brothers

Doom shocked the world and won the belts at last month’s Capital Combat so the Steiners are challenging here. Simmons and Scott get things going with Simmons being thrown around with ease. Reed takes one as well and the Steiner rule the ring early on. Ron comes back in and gets clotheslined in the back of the head, sending him off to Reed for a tag. Scott throws him around too before it’s off to Rick for a nice reaction.

Rick easily slams Simmons down and it’s back to Reed as Doom can’t get anything going so far. A Steiner Line and slam put Reed down in the corner but he runs to the floor to avoid more pain. Everything breaks down and Simmons gets in a cheap shot to put Rick on the floor as the referee keeps Scott from helping.

The fans chant Peanut Head at Theodore Long as Simmons chokes Rick down for two. Reed pounds on Rick in the corner but misses a running knee, allowing Rick to come off the middle rope with an ax handle. A double tag brings in Simmons and Scott as everything breaks down. Scott superplexes Ron but Reed hits Scott with a foreign object for the pin to retain the titles.

Rating: B-. These teams had very good chemistry together and this was another solid entry in the series. The Steiners were a great team and they were able to turn Doom into a good team, even though Doom held the titles longer than the Steiners ever did. The ending wasn’t great but you can’t keep jobbing the Steiners clean over and over.

Time for power vs. speed at Great American Bash 1990.

Tag Titles: Rock N Roll Express vs. Doom

This is more or less the final run for the RNR and they’re challenging here. Simmons vs. Gibson starts us off. JR talks about Gibson signing in the ring, as in sign language. Gibson speeds things up and gets a rollup for one, which makes Simmons tag in Reed. An elbow puts Butch back into the corner and here’s Ricky. Reed knocks Morton down so the Express double teams him down.

The idea of the match here is very simple: when the Express can double team they win, but when it’s one on one they don’t have much luck. Reed knocks both of them to the floor but it’s Gibson taking the worst of it. Back in a sunset flip gets two for Robert as does a slam for Reed. Morton comes in to speed things up and gets two with an O’Connor Roll on Butch. They speed the clock up to say that it’s been ten minutes.

Reed works over Morton with pure power and brings in Simmons. Morton gets a dropkick but Reed comes in to keep things at the status quo. Reed comes in and slows things back down again, which makes perfect sense for Doom. Gibson has had enough and comes in for some cheating but it doesn’t do enough to get him in legally. Back to Simmons as Morton takes a beating like only Ricky Morton can do.

Reed gets two off a big right hand and it’s time for more chinlocking. Doom does their cheating by throwing Morton over the top while the other has the referee distracted. Shoulder block gets two for Ron. Morton slugs it out with Reed which goes horribly and results in a powerslam for two. Morton ducks another shoulder and there’s the hot tag to Gibson. He cleans house and a sunset flip gets no count on Ron as everything breaks down. An enziguri sends Ron into Teddy to bring him inside. Gibson beats him up which is enough of a distraction for Reed to come off the top and kill Gibson with a shoulder to retain.

Rating: B. Doom was awesome at this point and would soon turn face and fight the Horsemen, causing some AWESOME fights. The Express never really went anywhere after this other than to the indies and other companies. Great match though in the traditional formula that the Express perfected long ago.

Their last great feud was against the Horsemen, starting at Halloween Havoc 1990.

World Tag Titles: Doom vs. Ric Flair/Arn Anderson

Doom has the titles and are recently turned faces. Anderson and Simmons start things off and AA gets shoved around. Simmons suplexes him down and headbutts him to the floor, making the Horsemen take a time out. Back in and Flair hits a knee to the back, but the suplex Anderson hits is no sold. Simmons comes back with right hands and Reed hits a knee of his own the back of Anderson. Powerslam gets two for Big Ron.

Teddy Long slaps Flair and Dangerously freaks out. Naitch comes in to face Reed and it’s time to strut. Flair goes to the eyes and takes over on a power man like only he can. Reed comes back with punches of his own and Doom hits stereo gorilla press slams to take over again. It gets back to Reed vs. Flair in the corner and the chops just don’t work on him Ric.

Reed sends him into the corner and the Flair Flip lands on a cameraman.

Simmons pounds Flair up the ramp and the chops STILL don’t work. Back to ringside and the Horsemen are in trouble. Anderson comes in to face Reed but it’s quickly off to Simmons. The Horsemen finally realize they can’t overpower Doom so they do what they do best: cheat! Flair comes back in and now his chops work. Anderson’s spinebuster gets two on Ron. Back to Flair and it’s time to go after the knee. There’s the Figure Four (on the correct leg and everything) and they even cheat during that.

Simmons finally makes it to the rope but Anderson is right there to keep Ron in the ring. Ron fights back but his right hands only get him so far. A dropkick misses and they get into a test of strength on the mat, letting Arn do his jump in the air and crotch himself spot. Back to Flair and even with Simmons worn down he can’t drop him with a shoulder. To the floor and Flair gets sent into the barricade to give Simmons a chance.

A sunset flip on Arn doesn’t work as Anderson makes the tag to Flair on the way down. Simmons hits a kind of clothesline (looked more like a jumping fist) but AA stops the tag AGAIN. Simmons is finally like screw this and drills Anderson so he can make the tag to Butch. Everything breaks down and Reed kills Anderson with a top rope shoulder for two. DDT kills Reed but Simmons makes the save. They fight to the floor and it’s a double countout which isn’t that popular of a decision.

Rating: B. I was digging this match until the end, but it was really just a setup for the better street fight at Starrcade. Granted that had Windham and Anderson due to Flair having to do something else that night but it was still the Horsemen. Anyway, good match here but the ending was more or less just a setup for a street fight later on.

The rematch from Starrcade 1990.

Tag Titles: Doom vs. Arn Anderson/Barry Windham

Doom is defending (the WCW tag titles, which are newly formed as the NWA Tag Titles are a thing of the past) and this is a street fight, meaning anything goes. The champions have unmasked since last year and now have former referee Teddy Long as their manager. It’s a big brawl to start with Simmons slamming Windham on the ramp. Arn makes the save and whips Ron with a belt as I’m barely going to be able to keep track of what’s going on here. Windham suplexes Reed in the ring for two as Simmons whips Anderson with a belt.

Reed hits Barry in the face as Anderson hits Simmons in the knee with a chair. Now Barry goes face first into the post and is busted open. Windham comes back with a belly to back suplex on the floor as Anderson is whipping Ron back near the ring. At least they’re all near each other now. Everyone but Reed gets in the ring now with Windham pounding on Simmons with a belt around his fist. Now Barry gets a chair to blast Simmons in the shoulder as Ron is taking a beating.

On the floor, Reed sends Arn into the barricade as Simmons hits a BIG spinebuster on Windham for two. Reed is back in now to pound on Windham as everyone is finally in the ring at the same time. Simmons gorilla presses Anderson down but Barry hits Ron low as he goes up top. There’s Barry’s superplex finisher but Simmons kicks out at two. Now Butch goes up top for a shoulder block on Anderson, only to get caught in a DDT by Windham.

Anderson brings the chair back in but gets it shoved down onto his own head by Simmons for two. Reed chokes on Barry with the chair but Anderson makes the save and sends Reed to the floor. Anderson goes to the middle rope but Reed saves Simmons, allowing Ron to clothesline him out of the air. Windham blasts Reed and it’s a double pin as Barry pins Butch and Ron pins Anderson at the same time, which means Doom retains the belts.

Rating: A-. Great brawl here with a bad ending. This would lead to another rematch between the two teams with Doom retaining the titles once and for all. Still though, after everything else we’ve sat through tonight, this was a big breath of fresh air and a great fight. Doom would drop the titles in a few months and split up in March.

Time for a dream match at Clash of the Champions XIV.

World Tag Team Titles: Sting/Lex Luger vs. Doom

Luger is US Champion again, having taken the title back from Hansen at Starrcade. Doom has recently turned heel again but Theodore Long is nowhere in sight. Reed and Sting get things going and fight over a lockup until Butch forearms Sting in the back. Sting takes him down with an armdrag into an armbar before it’s off to Luger for a swinging neckbreaker, sending Reed into the corner for a tag to Simmons.

Ron comes in hard with a running shoulder block but Luger runs him over with a clothesline of his own. These two actually played professional football together in the USFL back in the 1980s. A quick suplex gets two for Luger but he walks into a hot shot to stop him cold. We take a break during a match for one of the only times ever in the Clash of the Champions and come back with Luger elbowing Simmons in the back but walking into a powerslam. Luger scores with a clothesline but Reed comes in to break up the hot tag to Sting.

We hit the chinlock on Luger for a few moments but Simmons has to come in to stop another Luger comeback. Lex finally gets in a face jam to put Ron down but Reed comes in off the top with a shoulder block to put him down again. Unfortunately it knocks him into the corner for the tag to Sting and the roof goes off the building.

Dan Spivey, Luger’s challenger for the US Title at WrestleWar, comes out to jump Lex as Sting gets caught in a double team from Doom. Sting takes them both down with a double clothesline but the referee gets knocked down. Reed backdrops Sting over the top in front of the referee and that’s a DQ.

Rating: D+. This was angle advancement instead of match and while that makes sense, it doesn’t make the match any better. They didn’t have time to go anywhere which is a shame as these teams were probably capable of having an awesome match if given about fifteen minutes. Doom wouldn’t be long for the division but and you could see the luster was fading quickly.

It had to end sometime. From WrestleWar 1991.

World Tag Titles: Doom vs. Fabulous Freebirds

There’s a somewhat famous story to this that I’ll get to after the match is over. Before the match, DDP, the Freebirds’ manager, brings out Big Daddy Dink to be their road manager, whatever that means. Simmons and Hayes get us going and Simmons hits a quick spinebuster for two. Hayes hits a left hand for the same. Both Birds take powerslams for two. Garvin and Reed come in with Reed clotheslining his head off.

Garvin hooks a sunset flip for two and it’s back to Hayes. Reed looks a bit uninterested in the match for some reason. Garvin makes a blind tag but doesn’t jump Reed while he’s busy for some reason. A double elbow takes Garvin down and it’s back to Simmons. Boring match so far. Jimmy gets sent to the floor and hammered out there before it’s back to Reed in the ring. This is heel vs. heel for the most part so the dynamic is a bit off. Powerslam gets two on Garvin but Dink gets on the apron. Reed loads up his fist but hits Simmons by mistake, giving Garvin the pin and the titles.

Rating: F+. This was a horribly boring match. The whole idea here was that Doom is still having issues and would be broken up very soon. The Birds would be the subject of the story that I mentioned earlier which I’ll get to in a minute. The match sucked though as it was basically a squash with a screwy ending.

Post match Reed destroys Simmons with the object. Teddy leaves with Reed.

So as for the story, the Birds had actually lost the titles before they won them. At a TV taping six days prior to this, they were taped losing the titles to the Steiners, as in nearly a week before they won the belts. That was a very different time, as whole PPVs would be spoiled at TV tapings. Can you imagine that happening today? Update: I wrote that about two years ago and now TNA actually did it.

Doom didn’t last long but they were similar to the APA back then: two big brawlers who could beat the tar out of everyone in front of them. They had the longest WCW Tag Team Title reign ever and they’re fifty days ahead of anyone else. I was always a fan, if nothing else due to their awesome music. Check out some of their stuff if you want to see some good power brawling.

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Required Viewing #12: I Want Violence

WarGames.

Because I have a taste for some blood. For those of you young people that haven’t gotten to see this, it’s the ultimate team violence match. There are two rings side by side and they’re both surrounded by cage, save for the space between the rings. There are two teams of five men (later four) each and one man will start from both teams. They fight for five minutes and then there’s a coin toss. The winning team (the heels literally always won) would get to send in a second man for a 2-1 advantage, lasting two minutes. After those two minutes are up, the team that lost the toss sends in its second man to tie it up for two minutes. You alternate until all ten men are in and then it’s first submission wins.

This match almost always had a ton of blood and are easily the most violent matches you would find this side of Hell in a Cell. WCW started these in 1987 and ran them through 1997 (screw that mess in 1998. That wasn’t WarGames). We’re going to be looking at the two best, though almost all of them are worth checking out.

First up is the inaugural edition, held on July 4, 1987 on the Great American Bash tour.  This is the mother of all wars as we have Dusty Rhodes/Magnum TA/Road Warriors/Paul Ellering vs. the Four Horsemen/JJ Dillon.  I really don’t think this needs a huge explanation.

 

Dusty Rhodes/Road Warriors/Nikita Koloff/Paul Ellering vs. Four Horsemen/JJ Dillon

The Horsemen in this case are Flair, Anderson, Blanchard, Luger and JJ Dillon. Flair’s music is epic as they crank the music WAY up. This is the Atlanta main event and it’s the debut of WarGames. For those of you uninitiated, WarGames is the mother of all gimmick matches. You have two teams of five and each team sends in a member. Those two fight for five minutes and there’s a coin toss.

The winning team gets to send in the third man to have a 2-1 advantage. That lasts two minutes and then the team that lost the toss gets to send in its second man to tie it at 2-2. That lasts two minutes then the team that won the toss sends in its third man. You alternate like that every two minutes until it’s 5-5 and then it’s first submission. No pins allowed.

Arn and Dusty start us off and remember this can’t end until all ten are in. There are two rings side by side with one huge cage over them if I didn’t mention that. They feel each other out a lot as they’re not entirely sure what to do here. Dusty walks on the second rope and then swings across the top of the cage to kick him in the ribs. Now they’re going and Dusty pounds away including a low blow which is perfectly legal.

There’s a DDT by Dusty and the crowd is red hot. Arn is cut open about two and a half minutes in so Dusty rakes it across the cage wall. Everyone hates everyone on the other team so this is a huge blood feud all around. Dusty sends him into the cage and has dominated the entire time. After a quick comeback by Arn Dusty gets his bad Figure Four on and then lets go of it because….well just because I guess.

The Horsemen win the toss (the faces literally never won the thing) and it’s Tully in next. The Horsemen beat him down but Dusty is booking so he knocks them both down with elbows. And scratch that as Tully gets in a knee shot and the double teaming begins. Tully puts on a Figure Four as they work over the knee. The clock seems to skip ahead a bit (no sign of clipping though) and Animal comes in to tie it up.

He starts launching Horsemen everywhere and sets Tully up for a slingshot which he rams three straight times. Shoulder block takes Tully down and Dusty destroys Anderson. I think Blanchard is busted and he gets double teamed a bit. Anderson looks dead. Animal is like screw that and rams him into the cage a few times. Flair is in to make it 3-2 and chops at Animal which doesn’t work. The number catch up with him as Anderson is back up quickly.

Sorry for a lot of play by play here but it’s the only thing you can do in matches like this one. Animal is busted. Dusty tries to fight back but he’s almost on his own. The fans are so loud that you can’t hear Tony and Jim. Dusty is bleeding and here comes Nikita. Flair grabs him as he comes in but the power of RUSSIA breaks up the Horsemen. The double ring thing here is very nice as they have room to move around. Animal sends Flair into the cage and he’s bleeding now. Dusty is gushing blood.

Nikita and Dusty work on the knee of Anderson but Nikita goes to get Tully stuck between the two rings and hits him between the ropes in a slingshot thing. Flair begs off Nikita and that doesn’t end well for the champ. A double dropkick puts Anderson down and here’s Lex. This is literally non-stop. Powerslam plants Koloff and Lex is dominating. There’s a spike piledriver to Nikita and then a second one just to kill him deader than dead. The Horsemen are in control but they’re starting to fall from exhaustion and blood loss.

Here’s Hawk and the fans erupt all over again. He destroys everything in sight and if you’re not bleeding already you will be now. Nikita’s neck is messed up and he can barely stand. JR is in Heaven with this much carnage. Flair gets a Figure Four on Dusty but it doesn’t count yet. The Horsemen only have JJ Dillon left and he’s a manger. He goes after Hawk and that’s just dumb.

Flair saves JJ’s life and they’re getting tired. Flair is bleeding a ton as if you expected anything else. JJ is taking a beating but Animal is getting triple teamed. Here’s Ellering to get us all tied up and now the match can end. Ellering has an LOD spiked pad on his arm. Dillon is bleeding BAD so Ellering JAMS THE SPIKE INTO HIS EYE. The LOD circles in on Dillon as the rest of the team runs interference. The Warriors spear his head into the cage and load up the Doomsday Device. JJ lands on his shoulder, legitimately hurting it. With Animal running interference, Hawk beats him half to death until he gives up to finally end this.

Rating: A+. This runs 26 minutes and there is literally no stopping in the whole thing. There isn’t some period where they chill because they’ve done enough. This is about brutality and violence and it works very well. There’s a ton of blood and JJ looks like he fell out of a building (for some reason in wrestling attire) at the end of it. It’s well worth seeing and still works today. Great match.

 

Next up might be the greatest WCW match of all time.  This is the blowoff to the awesome Dangerous Alliance story as Sting and his buddies are finally getting to go against the Alliance in one huge, bloody match with an all-star lineup.  From WrestleWar 1992.

 

War Games: Sting’s Squadron vs. Dangerous Alliance

Sting, Ricky Steamboat, Dustin Rhodes, Barry Windham, Nikita Koloff
Rick Rude, Steve Austin, Larry Zbyszko, Bobby Eaton, Arn Anderson

Sweet goodness there is some talent in this match.

Ok so there isn’t much of a backstory here. Back in 1992 the storyline pretty much went like this: Sting fights everybody. He feuded with about 5 people at once, most of which are in this match. At Halloween Havoc and the Clash of the Champions that came just after it, Rude showed up and stole the US Title from Sting, forming this team. Sting won the world title at SuperBrawl and the Alliance wanted it off of him, no matter who did it (it would be Vader eventually but we’ll get to that later).

Larry and Arn were a tag team and feuded with Barry and Dustin over the tag titles. Barry had also just gotten the TV Title off Austin. Ricky wanted to be US Champion, which was Rude at the moment. Anderson and Eaton had taken them from Rhodes and Windham before losing them to the Steiners two weeks before this. In short, everyone hates everyone and they don’t care who they’re fighting. Koloff is there….just because Sting needed a fifth guy more or less. He would go after Rude after this PPV.

For those of you new to War Games, the rules are pretty basic. You start with a man each and they fight for five minutes. After that five minutes we flip a coin and the winning team gets to send in their second man for a 2-1 advantage that lasts two minutes. After two minutes, the team that lost gets to even it up at 2-2 for two minutes. After that two minutes the team that won the toss sends in it’s third man for two minutes. You alternate like that until it’s 5-5, then first submission wins. No pinfalls at all. It’s a double cage over both rings and there is nothing separating the two rings, so both cages only have three walls in essence, but it’s really just one big cage.

This is the first time I’ve seen this match since I got into the IWC and since I started reviewing, so this is going to be a fresh look at it. Let’s get to it.

Everyone is at ringside for this, so I’d expect a fight out there too. There are tops on the cages too. Crowd is just insane for Sting. Good grief that face team is STACKED. In a Dangerous Alliance huddle, we hear that Austin is starting for his team. He starts against Windham and it is ON immediately. Heyman keeps running strategy and it’s cool because what he’s saying is actual strategy and makes sense.

Both guys are really stiff in there and are just pounding on each other. Austin DIVES over both ropes and hits a clothesline. For those of you that haven’t seen him before he hurt his neck and his knees became made of jelly, go find some of his stuff. He’s a totally different but still very good worker. Windham rubs Austin’s face into the cage to bust him open. There’s a minute left before the next guy comes in. Windham bites the cut to open it up more. If you can’t tell, this is a very violent match.

The Alliance wins the coin toss (check the coin) and they send their big man, Rick Rude, in to make it 2-1. Also, that’s three world champions (Rude won the Big Gold Belt which is kind of a world title) in there I believe? The heels take over and Windham is in trouble. Rude’s tights look like the Comi-Con logo. Steamboat ties it up and goes straight for Austin. Ticked off Steamboat is AWESOME. Dang  it’s nice to hear this without Tony Schiavone making bad war puns.

Windham is busted open. Steamboat and Windham are dominating here but Anderson, the best wrestler to never win a world title (arguably) comes in and cleans house. Rude and Anderson both hook a crab on Steamboat. This has been non-stop the whole time which is a major perk of it. For some reason they’re all staying in the same ring. Well with five guys it’s ok. And there goes Steamboat and Rude so scratch that theory.

Dustin Rhodes comes in to balance it out. If my math is right, he’s the least successful guy in here? That’s saying a lot. Steamboat gets Rude in a figure four, more or less making it 2-2. Zbyszko, another former world champion, is in to make it 4-3. He’s been in trouble lately for being a screw-up and Rhodes beats the tar out of him as soon as he comes in. Madusa goes up the cage and slips Arn the phone but she and Sting have a standoff on the roof.

There is blood EVERYWHERE. The mat looks like an abstract painting. Sting, who has bad ribs thanks to Vader, evens things up and press slams Rude up into the air so that his back slams into the cage five times. Sting is just whipping it here and we have two more guys left to come in. Arn gets the cage rake again and is bleeding too. Everyone is in one ring which is kind of cluttering but there they go. At least it didn’t last long.

Eaton comes in as the last man for the Dangerous Alliance. Rhodes is bleeding a ton. Windham looks quite dead. Larry is messing with the turnbuckle. Keep that in mind as it’ll come into play later. The ropes are clearly loose thanks to Larry and Rude doing whatever they were doing. Koloff comes in to FINALLY start the match beyond. No submissions could have counted until now.

Koloff is a wild card because a year or so earlier he had nailed Sting but claimed it had been meant for Luger so no one is sure if you can trust him. He pushes Sting out of the way to let Austin and Anderson hit him in a GREAT bit of continuity since Sting pushed Luger out of the way to start their whole issue. This is just pure insanity and never stopping at all.

Sting gets the Scorpion on Anderson but Eaton makes the save. They completely get the turnbuckle unhooked so there is no top rope and the buckle is just laying in the ring. Austin is bleeding like crazy. Rhodes’ tights are polka dot now from blood on them. Larry tells Bobby to hold up Sting so he can hit him with the steel bar that came off the buckle. Sting ducks and Eaton takes it to the arm. Steamboat takes Larry out and Sting throws on an armbar for the submission and to blow the roof off the place. Heyman LOSES IT and everyone gets mad at Larry as the show ends. This broke up the Dangerous Alliance because they lost this and it kind of wound up turning Larry face but more or less he just retired.

Rating: A+. This right here is the best gimmick match blowoff to a feud ever. This match was about VIOLENCE and it worked incredibly well. The ending was great, the violence was great, most people bled, there is not a single dead spot in the nearly 25 minutes that this match ran, the crowd was white hot, and the feud ended here. This was it and everyone knew it so they left everything they had in the ring. Perfection for what it was supposed to be.

 

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Wrestler of the Day – March 29: Michael Hayes

Today we’re looking at one of the guys that belongs in the Hall of Fame: Michael Hayes.

Michael Hayes is of course most commonly known as part of a trio known as the Fabulous Freebirds. He was the unofficial leader of the team which was also comprised of Terry Gordy and Buddy Roberts. Their greatest feud, and one of the best feuds of all time, was against the Von Erichs.

The feud started when David Von Erich was challenging Ric Flair for the NWA World Title and Hayes tried to help David win. David didn’t want it like that and turned the help down, so Hayes slammed the cage door on David’s head, eventually giving Flair the win. The groups feuded for the better part of ten years, including this match at the David Von Erich Memorial Parade of Champions in 1984.

Six Man Tag Titles: Freebirds vs. Von Erichs

Kevin, Mike and Fritz here. The Birds are the champions and the titles are represented by a big trophy instead of belts. Mike is one of the saddest stories you’ll ever hear: He wasn’t a good wrestler in the first place and then he was injured. The injury resulted in toxic shock syndrome, which resulted in brain damage. His dad, Fritz, made him get back in the ring anyway. He committed suicide later in the 80s.

This is anything goes. Fritz is in a dress shirt and jeans. Everything breaks down quickly and chairs are thrown in. The referee says anything goes but you have to tag. Ok then. Kevin is bleeding from the big brawl. Ok so it’s officially Buddy Roberts vs. Kevin to start. Kevin beats him down and it’s a brawl in less than 10 seconds with everyone coming in. Off to Mike who goes straight for the leg.

Mike is a very small man. Hayes comes in and stomps away as the fans HATE him. A middle rope splash misses and here’s old man Fritz. Everything breaks down again and Fritz whips Hayes’ back with a belt. Kevin vs. the monster known as Terry Gordy. Gordy starts his boxing and the fans are erupting more and more every second now. If the Von Erichs win, Kerry gets Fritz’s title since Fritz is retired. I’m glad they cleared that up.

Kevin tries the Iron Claw but Gordy fights it off at the five minute mark. Hayes comes in and the fans are louder in this match than they’ve been in the whole show so far. Hayes takes off his boot to get in some shots and it’s off to Roberts. In one of the oddest moves you’ll ever seen, Roberts thrusts his hips forward so his belt buckle hits Kevin in the head. Fritz comes in and everything breaks down. Claw to Hayes and to Roberts at the same time. Hayes is busted bad. Various people are rammed into each other until Kevin comes off the top with a cross body to pin Roberts for the title.

Rating: C. This was the first decent match of the entire show. Granted a lot of that was probably due to the crowd finally being interested. This was without a doubt the feud that defines the promotion so you knew they were going to have something going on here. Not a bad match, but the rematch in July won Match of the Year from Meltzer, so check that out instead since it had Kerry so Fritz didn’t look so out of place.

Soon after this the Freebirds would move on to the WWF, where they had ONE match as a team. From August 25, 1984 in MSG.

Fabulous Freebirds vs. Butcher Vachon/Ron Shaw/Pete Doherty

Now here’s a rarity for you. This is 2/3 falls and to the best of my knowledge, this is the ONLY match for the Freebirds (Michael Hayes, Buddy Roberts and Terry Gordy) in the WWF. The Birds are good guys here and it’s Hayes vs. Vachon to start things off. Feeling out process to start with Hayes avoiding a shot in the corner before it’s off to Shaw. Hayes puts on a headlock and kicks Shaw in the face for good measure. Off to Roberts who pounds away on Shaw for a bit as we seem to be in squash territory.

Gordy comes in for a one arm slam before it’s off to Doherty. Back to Roberts who chases Doherty into the corner for a tag to Vachon. A slam puts Butcher down and here’s Hayes again, only to have him miss an elbow drop. The unnamed team pounds on Hayes in the corner but Gordy comes in for a save. Michael slides through the legs and tags in Gordy for a cross body to pin Vachon for the first fall.

After a break we start the second fall with Gordy locking up with Vachon. A few slams put Butcher down and it’s off to Shaw again. This goes about as well as you would expect for a jobber against a team the company is trying to get over as Buddy snaps Ron’s neck over the top rope. Doherty comes in and starts some triple teaming on Buddy which goes nowhere so here’s Hayes again to pound away. Doherty misses a legdrop and everything breaks down. Gordy gets all fired up and Doherty is backdropped down. An elbow from Roberts gets the pin.

Rating: D. I’m getting tired of writing that but it’s another uninteresting match which just kept going. The Birds would be back to likely Texas soon after this as the WWF wanted to split them up. To be fair, a three man team was only going to be able to do so much in the WWF, so the Freebirds weren’t the best fit around here.

It was soon off to the AWA for a big feud with the Road Warriors, including the Birds challenging them for the World Tag Team Titles at Superclash 1985.

AWA Tag Titles: Freebirds vs. Road Warriors

The Warriors are defending. This is Hayes/Gordy and they have their faces painted with the Confederate Flag. The champs clear the ring before the bell and are mad over because this is in Chicago. Hawk and Gordy start as Hayes walks around the field with people yelling at him. Hawk pounds on Terry so Terry heads off to bring in Hayes. Off to Animal as the Birds stall. Ok it’s Animal vs. Gordy.

The squashing continues with the Warriors taking their shots at Gordy. Michael comes back in again and gets pounded so much he crawls back to Gordy for a tag. Terry is like uh….not right now. Gordy finally wakes up and goes after the eyes before dodging a charging Hawk to send his shoulder into the post. Hayes comes back in and hits a side suplex for two. Piledriver by Gordy mostly works but Hawk doesn’t feel like selling that much.

Hayes goes up but Hawk slams him off the top but manages to tag before Hawk can. That’s kind of impressive. Gordy and Hawk collide but there’s the hot one to Animal. Hayes stays on the apron as Animal destroys Gordy, getting two off a powerslam. Everything breaks down and even Roberts and Ellering come in. Ellering gets dropped with a chair and Gordy accidentally pops Hayes. Powerslam to Hayes by Animal and a shoulder to Gordy looks to finish but Hayes comes off the middle rope with something around his hand to knock Animal out for the pin and the titles! The place is stunned.

Rating: D+. This one didn’t quite work either. The whole match was a mess and the ending was hard to follow due to everything going all nuts. The Warriors were still in the period where they would do nothing but run people over, which ran for about the next six or eight years. Bad match for the most part, but you know what’s coming.

Verne Gagne comes out and says hold on a minute. He reverses the decision and the Warriors get the titles back.

A rematch from WrestleRock 1986 but with no titles on the line.

Road Warriors vs. Freebirds

 

Thank goodness this is the last match. This actually took place before the other tag two cage matches, but Verne had to go on last on the real card. The tape version makes him seem more humble at least. This is Hayes/Garvin. Hawk and Hayes get things going. Hayes immediately hits a piledriver which is of course no sold. Let the pain begin. Hayes goes into the cage a few times and he’s busted quickly.

 

Gorilla press to Hayes and Hawk drops a right hand. Garvin runs away from a tag so Hayes tries to climb out. Hawk goes up top as well and Michael is knocked to the floor. Garvin finally gets the tag and he’s tentative at best. Why no Animal yet? Oh there he is, for a TEN REP gorilla press. Now Hayes runs from the tag.

 

And never mind as he comes in a few seconds alter. Hayes gets in a few shots but Hawk runs him over quickly. He bites the cut on Hayes’ head because Hawk is a little nuts. Garvin comes in to pound on him and it’s back to Hayes for a figure four. Hawk easily breaks it and it’s back to Garvin, whose offense is shrugged off. Not hot tag to Animal and everything breaks down. Hayes pulls out some brass knuckles but he hits Garvin by mistake so Animal gets the easy pin.

 

Rating: D. According to the announcer that gives the Warriors revenge for something, but again it’s not important enough to tell us about. This was about as dominant of a match as you can see without it being a squash. The Birds never had a chance but they were against the Road Warriors so that shouldn’t be a shock. The Warriors left the AWA after this match.

Around this time it was clear that the WWF was destroying every company in sight, so the rest of the organizations banded together to fight back. This resulted in a lot of super shows, such as SuperClash III, an AWA show with CWA and WCCW talent. Hayes teamed up with a guy named Steve Cox to challenge the Samoan Swat Team for the WCCW World Tag Team Titles.

WCCW Tag Titles: Samoan Swat Team vs. Michael Hayes/Steve Cox

The Samoans are Samu and Fatu with Buddy Roberts as the Freebirds are split up for awhile here. Cox is a no name and this is all WCCW. Cox and Hayes are the only team to beat the Samoans ever and they’ve traded the titles for the last few months. Cox’s nickname is Do It To It. The 80s were a weird time to say the least. The rows of empty seats are kind of funny.

Hayes and Fatu start us off and Marshall can’t tell them apart either. Oh ok he called him Fatu. That helps some. Cox and Hayes work on the arm and it’s so weird to see Hayes as a face. Fatu misses a cross body and it’s back to the arm. Off to Samu as Hayes plays cheerleader. Heel miscommunication sends Fatu to the floor. Cox goes after him and eats table, shifting the momentum.

Big brawl breaks out and Roberts is able to get in a shot to Cox before sending him back inside. Samu slams him face first and the beating continues. Fatu (Rikishi) comes in off the top and Cox plays Ricky Morton for awhile. There’s a hot shot to Cox but a double clothesline puts both guys down. Hot tag to Hayes and everything breaks down. Cox and Fatu go to the floor as Hayes gets the DDT. Roberts comes in and drills Hayes though and Samu steals the pin to retain.

Rating: B-. Pretty good tag match here but it’s the late 80s so did you expect anything else? The SST would never lose the titles but would just leave the company, heading to the NWA again. Cox is a total no name and Hayes would be back in the NWA soon after this also I believe. Not bad here and a nice little surprise.

We’ll actually look at a singles match now with Hayes challenging US Champion Lex Luger at Wrestlewar 1989.

US Title: Lex Luger vs. Michael Hayes

This would be like Cena vs. Miz two years ago. Hayes is the career tag team guy that says he can do it without help. Luger is the hottest thing in the world not named Sting. Both guys in blue here which is kind of a weird look. Hayes stalls a lot to open the match as he tries to frustrate Lex. Hayes was Luger’s partner for no apparent reason and then turned on him because he’s a natural heel.

Teddy Long is here again for no adequately explained reason. Hayes gets slapped and stalls again. He comes back in, gets slammed and hits the floor again. Five minutes gone and Hayes has stalled more than a broken down truck. Hiro Matsuda, a big time heel manager, is here too. Luger works on the arm to take away the DDT which makes sense.

The idea here is Hayes does basic stuff, it doesn’t work, Luger pounds on him for a bit, Hayes stalls and cheats then we start again. Ten minutes in and Hayes has a chinlock. Hayes gets in a nice left hand and a bulldog for two. Matsuda sends Luger into the railing as Luger is in trouble. Bulldog is blocked by Luger and the crowd pops big.

Luger goes nuts again with a bunch of slams and clotheslines. The Rack is reversed though and Hayes gets the DDT to shock the crowd. No cover though so we slug it out. They hit heads and the referee goes down. One of the Freebirds comes down and puts Hayes on Luger and shoves Luger’s foot off the ropes to allow Hayes to win the title as the crowd is SILENT. This was legitimately a shock, up there with Sheamus beating Cena for the title at TLC.

Rating: D+. The match sucked but the ending brings it up a good bit. This was far too long at over 16 minutes but it wasn’t completely worthless. Luger would get the title back in just over two weeks and hold it for about a year and a half so it’s not like this meant anything long term. Pretty weak match but the ending helped it a lot.

It was quickly back to the tag team ranks under the Freebirds name, though this time Hayes teamed up with Jimmy Garvin in the World Tag Team Title tournament. Here are the semi-finals from Clash of the Champions VII.

World Tag Team Title Tournament Semifinals: Dynamic Dudes vs. Freebirds

 

The Dudes are Johnny (John Laurinitis) and Shane (Shane Douglas), a couple of guys that ride skateboards. The Freebirds are Michael Hayes and Jimmy Garvin, the latter of whom is a replacement for Terry Gordy (in the corner tonight) who wanted to be a singles wrestler again. Garvin has been affiliated with the team for years but never officially joined them. Johnny and Shane beat Rip Morgan and Jack Victory in the first round while the Freebirds beat the Road Warriors. One more note: it’s roughly 100 degrees in the building as there are about 1000 people there and there was no air conditioning.

 

The Freebirds try to get in a cheap shot to start but walk into a pair of suplexes, sending them outside. Johnny and Michael get things going with Hayes quickly being taken down by an armdrag. Garvin comes in and gets the same treatment before the shorter Dude comes in for a wristlock of his own. A double elbow drop has Garvin in even more trouble Michael and Shane come back in with Hayes getting caught in a sunset flip for two. Back to Johnny who misses a cross body and crashes to the mat, allowing Jimmy to come back in and stomp away.

 

Johnny is sent to the floor and chopped by Hayes as the fans are all over the Freebirds. Back up and the two of them ram heads, allowing for the hot tag to Shane. Hayes breaks up another sunset flip attempt and everything breaks down. A double dropkick puts Hayes on the floor but the referee gets Johnny onto the apron. Shane rolls up Garvin for two but Michael slides back in and lays Shane out for the DDT, giving Jimmy the easy pin. This was the Dudes’ first loss.

 

Rating: C. Basic match here but there’s nothing wrong with that. The new Freebirds needed a win to establish themselves as a threat for later and the Dudes were far too new to be a threat. Surprisingly enough Gordy never interfered, despite being one of the most famous cheaters in wrestling.

And the finals from later in the night.

World Tag Team Titles: Freebirds vs. Midnight Express

 

During the entrances, Dangerously comes out with a tennis racket and knocks Cornette silly. The Midnights take the racket and open the case, exposing a horseshoe and a chain inside. The Dynamic Dudes come out to carry Cornette to the back, leaving the Midnights at a 3-2 disadvantage. Hayes and Lane get things going with Stan scoring with some slams and armdrags, sending Hayes to the corner for a tag off to Garvin. Eaton comes in as well to drop an elbow on Garvin’s neck before bringing Lane back in for an enziguri.

 

A double back elbow gets two on Garvin and Jimmy is furious. The Freebirds have a meeting on the floor until Garvin comes back in for a knee to Eaton’s ribs. Bobby is thrown to the floor and Hayes pops him in the face with a right hand. Stan protects his partner from an even worse beating and get him a breather. Eaton makes it back onto the apron but gets knocked off onto the barricade to make things even worse.

 

Back inside and Garvin hooks a chinlock but Eaton fights up and sends him into the corner. Instead of trying to put up a fight, Eaton is smart enough to head right to the corner and tag in Lane who DDTs Hayes and tags Bobby back in far too soon. Everything breaks down and Lane dropkicks Hayes outside for a moment. Terry Gordy tries to interfere but gets knocked outside before Garvin takes the double flapjack for two. The referee is with Lane, allowing Gordy to come in and powerbomb Eaton, giving Garvin the pin and the titles.

 

Rating: C-. Not a terrible match here and the idea of the Midnights being off their game due to Cornette not being around made sense. This was quite the year for Hayes as he had a brief US Title reign after stealing the title from Lex Luger at WrestleWar. The Midnights weren’t having the best year but they would eventually round back into form.

The Birds wouldn’t do much in 1990 but would be back in the title hunt by Wrestlewar 1991.

World Tag Titles: Doom vs. Fabulous Freebirds

There’s a somewhat famous story to this that I’ll get to after the match is over. Before the match, DDP, the Freebirds’ manager, brings out Big Daddy Dink to be their road manager, whatever that means. Simmons and Hayes get us going and Simmons hits a quick spinebuster for two. Hayes hits a left hand for the same. Both Birds take powerslams for two. Garvin and Reed come in with Reed clotheslining his head off.

Garvin hooks a sunset flip for two and it’s back to Hayes. Reed looks a bit uninterested in the match for some reason. Garvin makes a blind tag but doesn’t jump Reed while he’s busy for some reason. A double elbow takes Garvin down and it’s back to Simmons. Boring match so far. Jimmy gets sent to the floor and hammered out there before it’s back to Reed in the ring. This is heel vs. heel for the most part so the dynamic is a bit off. Powerslam gets two on Garvin but Dink gets on the apron. Reed loads up his fist but hits Simmons by mistake, giving Garvin the pin and the titles.

Rating: F+. This was a horribly boring match. The whole idea here was that Doom is still having issues and would be broken up very soon. The Birds would be the subject of the story that I mentioned earlier which I’ll get to in a minute. The match sucked though as it was basically a squash with a screwy ending.

Post match Reed destroys Simmons with the object. Teddy leaves with Reed.

So as for the story, the Birds had actually lost the titles before they won them. At a TV taping six days prior to this, they were taped losing the titles to the Steiners, as in nearly a week before they won the belts. That was a very different time, as whole PPVs would be spoiled at TV tapings. Can you imagine that happening today?

A year later and the Freebirds had turned face. They would challenge Greg Valentine/Terry Taylor for the US Tag Team Titles at Wrestlewar 1992.

US Tag Titles: Greg Valentine/Terry Taylor vs. Freebirds

It amazes me how far tag wrestling has fallen. There are midcard tag titles here. The Freebirds are faces here and for the life of me I don’t get what was seen in Valentine and Taylor as a team. There are two rings here which is always kind of strange but it’s still cool. The Freebirds both use the DDT here so they’re looking for the quick win. Fonzie from ECW is the referee here.

Taylor and Hayes start us off and the fans more or less hate Taylor. At least they’re smart. It’s just strange seeing the Freebirds as faces. Also Greg Valentine is a champion in 1992. What’s weird about this picture? A backhand chop is a judo chop according to Jim. For those of you unsure, the Freebirds are Jimmy Garvin (no one of note really) and Michael Hayes, who is currently the head writer for Smackdown.

ALL Freebirds so far but this is a long match so there’s plenty of time left. We’re about eight minutes in and the champions haven’t been on offense longer than maybe 20 seconds yet. I could watch Valentine fall on his face every day. It’s just perfectly done. The heels take over for a bit and I emphasize the bit part since Garvin takes over again to get us to even.

Hayes gets a hot tag and cleans house. The crowd is hot tonight which gives me a good feeling about the main event. Hayes gets hit in the back of the head with the Five Arm, Terry’s finisher but it only gets two. Fans are completely behind the Freebirds. Taylor gets a gutwrench powerbomb for two on Hayes which is a move I wish we saw more often. We’re nearly fifteen minutes in and Jesse says it’s too early to go for the figure four.

Valentine works on the arm which is just weird for him but whatever. This has been a good match so I can live with that. Another hot tag to Garvin and he cleans house. Everything goes insane and Garvin gets a DDT on Taylor for the pin and the titles. Solid opener and the crowd is happy so everything worked. The titles would be retired in July so it’s not like it means much.

Rating: B. Great opener here as the crowd was way into it and the title change works well to open a show. Starting a show with a good tag match is pretty much a universally good idea and this was no exception. I’m not a fan of any of these four but this was a very solid match and has me wanting to watch more of the show, which is exactly the point of an opener.

Hayes would soon become a manager and mostly retire. He would eventually become Doc Hendrix in the WWF before managing the Hardy Boys under his own name. Hayes would wrestle a few matches around this time, including a handicap match at Fully Loaded 1999.

Tag Titles: Acolytes vs. Hardys/Michael Hayes

Yep it’s a handicap match. At this point I had zero clue which was Matt and which was Jeff. We start in the aisle where they just leave the belts. Who would have thought two of these four would win world titles? I don’t think this has started yet. According to Ross it has. Ah there’s the bell so Ross was wrong.

We have Farrooq and Jeff in there to start while Bradshaw beats up both guys on the floor. Matt takes out everyone with a top rope moonsault. They really were great fliers back in the day. Hayes is pretty freaking worthless here but what did you really expect? The APA takes over with just power. Matt picks to tag Hayes. Why in the world would you do that? We get a Freebird reference so I’m good for the night. There’s Jeff. Crowd is DEAD for this.

I think Lita helped them a good bit to say the least. The Hardys simply aren’t that good at this point. Bradshaw gets a nice belly to back suplex off the top. Not bad. Jeff clocks him with Hayes’ cane over the head. Poetry in Motion is still very much a work in progress here. Hayes comes in and a double powerbomb gives the APA their titles back. Edge, Christian and a ladder would be coming soon.

Rating: D+. I didn’t like it at all. Hayes was just in the way here as he’s old and most of the people here don’t know what he used to be nor do they care more than likely. The Hardys would dump him maybe the next night. Either way, the APA would lose the belts to Kane and X-Pac two weeks later so this was just to get Hayes out of the Hardy picture.

Michael Hayes is a guy that wasn’t all that great in the ring, but man alive could he talk. I’ve heard of several wrestlers that got into wrestling because of Michael Hayes or were huge Hayes fans, including Raven. The guy is just ridiculously charismatic and can talk with the best of them. He was a much better talker than wrestler, but that’s the key to a lot of stars over the years.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Clash of the Champions at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – February 6: Steiner Brothers

Another day, another rocking old school tag team. Today: the Steiner Brothers, due to them being on a show that happened on this day back in the 80s. It was this or Madusa so I think I made the right pick.

Rick had been feuding with the Varsity Club in late 1988 but realized he couldn’t fight them alone. Early in 1989 he brought in his younger brother Scott and formed the team. One of their first big matches was at Clash of the Champions 7 against the Varsity Club, comprised of Kevin Sullivan and Mike Rotunda.

Varsity Club vs. Steiner Brothers

This is more or less the major debut for the Steiners as a team. Sullivan and Rotunda as their opponents here in a VERY long running feud. This is under Australian rules, whatever that means. The Steiners have Missy with them. Scott is in regular tights so you know this is an early appearance for him. Big brawl to start as Rick is way over.

Hey there’s another Coors Light reference and let’s thank some army dudes. Rick vs. Mike now which is the real meat of the feud. Ross says hi to all of the fans in Connecticut where they’re headed soon which might be a slight jab at WWF but nothing big. The commentary is more or less just a commercial for the upcoming tour.

Kind of a slow start here but the fans are into it and it’s nothing bad at all. You can see the superstar in Scott just waiting to get out. The Club throws Scott to the table on the floor and then throws steps at his legs and connects. He’s limping badly now which very well could be legit. Ross and Caudle are FREAKING over this which isn’t exactly overkill here. Gorgeous dropkick by Rotunda puts Scott down.

Hot tag to Rick but Sullivan had the referee. I love that trick as it’s so simple yet it works every time. Mike misses a dropkick and there’s the real hot tag. Rick just massacres both guys until Scott can get back up. Sullivan steals Caudle’s chair and slides it into Mike who hits a suplex on Scott onto the chair on Scott’s already injured back (which was played up throughout the match after landing on the table in a nice mini-story) for the pin.

Rating: B-. This was pretty good with a basic formula, a nice story and a hot crowd packed together into less than 9 minutes. The Steiners would of course go on to become the most successful tag team in company history but this was more or less their first match that meant anything. Fun stuff here and a fairly good match.

The Steiners were about to be unleashed on the world and they received their first World Tag Team Title shot at Clash of the Champions 8.

World Tag Titles: Freebirds vs. Steiner Brothers

The Birds are champions and this is the Steiners’ first shot at the titles. Scott is a totally different guy here, to the point where he was a nod of the head away from being handed the world title and being made the focus of all of WCW in about 1991. Flair flat out said you say the time I’ll lay down for you. Think about that for a minute. Then he destroyed his arm and didn’t get the title for 9 years. That’s wrestling for you.

 

Missy and Robin are here with the brothers. Scott is in regular trunks here so you can tell he’s brand new. Scott vs. Hayes starts us off. Hayes stalls a lot and then stalls a lot more. Scott speeds things up but runs into the left hand which is one of Hayes’ big moves. A top rope cross body by Hayes is rolled through for two and Scott cleans house. Garvin comes in and Scott runs over him too. A SWEET reverse German hits and here’s a tag to Rick. Scott looked like Kurt Angle out there.

 

Rick knocks both of the Birds to the floor and gets on all fours. Hayes comes in next and dances a lot, just ticking Rick off even more. There’s a powerslam and one for Garvin as he tries a sneak attack. Hayes gets in a few punches so Rick just mauls him and hits a release belly to belly. Rick then misses one of the hardest charges ever into the corner. Garvin comes in with his DDT finisher but Scott makes the save.

 

Back to Hayes who sends him out to the floor for more of a beating. Rick gets beaten down for awhile as we’re just waiting for Scott to come in and start breaking stuff. Garvin comes back in and hits a running knee to the head for two. Time for a chinlock but Rick snapmares out of it. Why don’t more people use that as a counter?

 

There’s the tag to Scott (thanks for telling me JR. No seriously, the camera cut to the crowd so we didn’t see if he made it or not) and it’s Frankensteiners (and I mean standing ones, not ones out of the corner) and a BIG powerslam for Hayes. Scott hits the ropes but someone (presumably one of the girls but we intentionally can’t see which) trips him and a quick DDT keeps the titles on the Birds.

 

Rating: B-. If you’ve EVER been unclear about why people rave and rave some more about Scott Steiner, go find this match right now, keeping in mind that he’s 24 here and had been on national TV as a wrestler for about 3 months. This was one of the most impressive performances I’ve seen in a LONG time. By the way, it was Robin that tripped Scott. She turned heel and debuted Doom soon thereafter, presumably because she wanted to get gangbanged by Ron Simmons and Butch Reed.

 

The Steiners would take the titles about two months later and hold them for several months. A major show during their reign was Starrcade 1989 which was comprised of two Iron Man tournaments. In the tag team version, the Steiners faced the most dominant tag team of all time: the Road Warriors. This is the only match (that mattered) between the two teams.

 

Steiner Brothers vs. Road Warriors

 

This is the ONLY meeting (that mattered) between two of the biggest tag teams of all time. Why it was wasted on a show like this in an inconsequential tag match is beyond me. These teams are friends at this point. Scott and Hawk get things going with Cornette considering this a battle of idiots. Ross says the fans are in awe as an excuse for them being bored so far. Both guys get big boots to the face in succession so it’s off to Rick for a chance at Hawk.

 

Hawk hits a BIG clothesline to take Rick down for two before Animal comes in for a double back elbow. Rick comes back with a Steiner Line to stagger Animal and we’re at a standoff. Animal tries a bearhug but gets caught in a belly to belly suplex for no cover. Back to Scott to meet Hawk with the bird enthusiast gorilla pressing him down to the mat with ease. Rick has to make the save this time and Hawk is annoyed at his actions. Animal comes back in and gets caught in a few belly to belly suplexes. This is pure power the entire way so far.

 

Animal comes out of the corner with a hard clothesline so Hawk comes in for an over the shoulder kneeling backbreaker. A release tilt-a-whirl slam gets two on Scott but he comes back with what was supposed to be a middle rope suplex. Instead it was more like Hawk fell flat on Scott’s chest and was driven face first into the mat. Back to Animal for a bearhug on Scott followed by a BIG powerslam from Hawk. Everything breaks down and Animal picks up Scott for a belly to back suplex with Hawk adding a top rope clothesline. Animal bridges Scott back but Scott raises his arm to get the pin as Animal’s shoulders were down.

 

Rating: D+. Most of that is for the star power alone. This was a lot of pounding on each other and a SCARY botch on that middle rope belly to belly superplex. The Steiners winning was probably the right move here as they shouldn’t have gotten pinned while still being the tag team champions. The Warriors should NOT be wrestling multiple matches in one night though as they already look spent.

 

After winning the US Tag Titles later in the year, the Steiners would also enter the Pat O’Connor Memorial Tag Team Tournament at Starrcade 1990 and advance to the finals. Here’s the championship match.

 

Pat O’Connor Memorial Tag Team Tournament Finals: Great Muta/Mr. Saito vs. Steiner Brothers

 

There’s a special guest Japanese referee. Dangerously picks the Japanese guys because they make better cars. Scott and Muta get things going with Muta firing off the kicks to take Scotty down. Scott comes right back with a rolling leg lock into a half crab which I didn’t think he was capable of doing. Off to Rick and the fans bark (I believe I’ve neglected to mention that his nickname was the Dog Faced Gremlin) on cue. Rick Steiner Lines Muta down and it’s off to Saito for a brawl.

 

Rick gets pounded down so he busts out a dropkick of all things followed by a HARD Steiner Line. Muta goes up top and gets crotched as he tries to come in, keeping the advantage in America. Saito bows in respect to Rick so he kicks Saito in the face. A BIG USA chant breaks out as Scotty gets the tag to face Muta. The Great one knocks Scott back into the corner and hits the handspring elbow but an attempt at a second one results in Muta’s face hitting Scott’s boot.

 

A belly to belly suplex gets two on Muta so it’s back to Saito. Scott fires off some hard right hands and a back elbow to the face before it’s off to Rick, who walks into a suplex. Saito and Rick collide to put both guys down (Ross: “That was like a Ford hitting a Honda.”) but it’s Muta in off the tag. Rick is sent to the floor where Saito can ram him into the post before Muta blasts Rick in the head with a bell.

 

Saito whips Rick into a hard clothesline from Rick as the Japanese are playing full on heels in this match, despite being gentlemen all night. Back in and Saito comes in off the middle rope with a shot to the ribs before it’s off to a choke. Saito keeps choking long enough for Muta to come in off the top with an elbow to Rick’s back. It’s back to Muta who walks into a Steiner Line and there’s the hot tag to Scott.

 

A tiger driver gets two on Muta as everything breaks down. Saito hits the Saito Suplex (modified belly to back) on Scott for two and the Japanese guys hit a spike piledriver for good measure. Rick breaks up the count but Muta is already posing. A blind tag brings in Rick, who comes in off the top with a sunset flip on Saito for the pin and the tournament championship.

 

Rating: B-. This wasn’t terrible but at the same time it didn’t work all that well. They were going with pure American patriotism to carry the match which worked well enough given the crowd reaction, but the wrestling was only decent. The Steiners winning was the right move, unless you wanted to have the Japanese guys cheat like nuts to win and set up a future title match between the teams. Still though, not bad.

 

With no one left to conquer in America, the Steiners (once again WCW World Tag Team Champions) went over to Japan for the first WCW/New Japan SuperShow for a shot at the IWGP World Tag Team Titles.

 

IWGP/WCW Tag Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Kensuke Sasaki/Hiroshi Hase

The Steiners are the WCW World and US Tag Champions. To say they were the most dominant team in the company is an understatement. This by the way is Meltzer’s match of the year. I saw their rematch and it was good but not great at all. Let’s see how this one is. This is when Scott was more or less totally awesome and could have been world champion if he wanted to but he stayed with Rick instead.

Hase vs. Scott start us off and the fans are LOUD. We hit the mat almost immediately and Scott goes for the knees. Hase stays in a crouch and makes Scott comes to him. Big old kick to the back of the head of Scott as this Hase isn’t bad. Sasaki comes in and gets a ROAR. He beats up Rick and takes his head OFF with a lariat.

Scott and Hase come in and Scott hits what we would call an Angle Slam off the top. Incredibly hart hitting match so far. There’s the Steiner Line to take Hase down. A minor edit there and Scott hits a great belly to belly for two. DDT hits but no cover which is kind of stupid. Belly to belly off the middle rope gets two again as Sasaki makes the save. Butterfly Powerbomb requires another save.

Sasaki gets a spinning Rock Bottom on Rick and a suplex on Scott as we jump ahead another little bit. Sasaki suplexes Hase onto Rick in a cool spot. Rick kicks out of Hase’s Northern Lights Suplex, his finisher. Tilt-a-whirl slam to Hase from Scott. This is nothing but high impact awesomeness. Both teams go for the top rope bulldog but only the Steiners get it. Frankensteiner to Sasaki (which is really not that impactful) gets three (even though the shoulder was up) to give the Steiners their third title.

Rating: A-. It’s definitely good, but if this is the best match of the year then 1991 was a lot leaner than I thought it was. I wouldn’t put it ahead of Warrior vs. Savage from Mania or anything like that, but hey it’s a match involving Japanese guys so of course it wins in the case of a tie with a WWF match right? This was very good though and I can see the praise it gets.

 

With no regular teams to beat, it was time for the Steiners to face a super team: Sting and Lex Luger. From the first SuperBrawl.

 

Tag Titles: Lex Luger/Sting vs. Steiner Brothers

It’s face vs. face here and Luger is US Champion. I freaking love the way Capetta (the ring announcer) says someone is a world champion. He pauses before saying world very loudly. Ross says we’re starting with power vs. power but all four of them can do power stuff with I guess Rick being the weakest one? Geez there are a lot of titles in this match. It amazes me to no end that Luger would be top heel in less than a year, defending the title against Sting in February at SuperBrawl II.

The crowd is actually reacting to this match unlike almost every other match on the card which is really not a good sign. They’re doing a lot of technical stuff here which is a nice change of pace. In a bad looking spot, Steiner throws a shoulder at Luger and hits him solidly but Lex just shrugs it off and Steiner stays down. Sting jumps over the rope which is a spot that was more or less unheard of at the time and he nails it.

He’s the only person in wrestling history that I would put against RVD as far as leaping ability goes. Also considering his size (6’3 so just under Orton’s height) it’s even more impressive. Magnum TA put Sting about as perfectly as anyone I’ve ever heard: he had so much charisma and talent when he first got going that he didn’t know what to do with it. That’s absolutely spot on too.

A year or so before this he would have been lost out there. Not due to a lack of ability, but simply because he didn’t know how to channel his energy. Imagine a guy like Shelton Benjamin but with Edge’s charisma and you have Sting. Now within a year or two, he had the ring sense of a guy like Eddie Guerrero, making him one of if not the absolute best wrestler in the world. He’s maybe my 2nd favorite wrestler of all time and was easily the top face in the company around this time.

About a year or so from now, he would be the undisputed king of WCW and was even bigger than Flair when he returned from that other company. Anyway enough about Sting as I just rambled for five minutes over a plancha. This is a great match that I’m not going to do a lot of commentary on. It goes about eleven minutes and the longest dead spot is about 20 seconds.

They work themselves to death out there and it makes things go well. After things break down and we have a ref bump, we go to a camera shot that would be like someone looking at the ring from the entrance and we see a big bald guy walking to the ring. It’s Koloff from earlier and he has a chain around his arm. He gets a running start at Luger who has his back to him. Sting shoves him out of the way and takes the chain which lets Scott get the pin.

I love that ending as it furthers Sting and Koloff, or actually starts it I guess. After that there’s no way to put one team over the other so I’m actually fine with it. Sting goes after Koloff in the back and they fight outside.

Rating: A. This is a great tag match all around as you have four guys that can legitimately go with each other out there, a good story as it’s respect all around, and the workrate is off the freaking charts here. All four guys worked very hard and the crowd was itno it all the way. What more can you ask for here?

 

After a brief singles run for Scott, the Brothers left for the WWF in late 1992. One of their first major matches was at Wrestlemania IX against the Headshrinkers.

 

Steiner Brothers vs. Headshrinkers

This should be solid stuff. The Shrinkers are Samu and Fatu (Rikishi) here. Historic moment: JR calls this match a slobberknocker, unleashing the term on the wrestling world. The Headshrinkers have Afa as their manager, which will be mentioned later. Scott and Fatu start things off and after being shoved by the Samoan, Scott easily takes him down by the legs. A big old Steiner Line flips Fatu inside out but the Headshrinkers take Scott into the corner to work him over.

The Steiners are sent to the floor so they both climb to the top and hit a double Steiner Line to take both Samoans out to the floor. We settle down to Scott vs. Fatu again but it’s quickly off to Rick. Apparently Luna has attacked Sherri at the first aid station. Samu pounds on Rick in the corner and hits a running clothesline, only to be taken down by a running forearm/clothesline. Samu goes face first into the post to absolutely no effect, because he’s Samoan you see.

Back to Scott but Afa gets on the apron for a distraction. Scott charges into a hot shot to send him out to the floor in a NASTY looking bump. Afa cracks his staff over Scott’s back which looked great and sounded even greater. Things settle down a bit and Fatu hits a backbreaker and middle rope headbutt for two on Scott. A spinning kick to the face takes Scott down again but Samu charges into a boot in the corner.

Fatu blocks the hot tag by knocking Scott to the floor where he gets sent face first into the post. In a sweet sequence, Scott tries to ram Fatu’s head into the mat but Fatu pops up and superkicks Scott right back down. A modified Demolition Decapitatior gets two on Scott and let’s hit that nerve hold. Scott fights up and they collide as is common in tag matches. Heenan keeps ripping on JR and Oklahoma as Ross has almost no idea what to make of this kind of sarcasm. That says a lot when he used to work with Jim Cornette.

Back to Samu who goes up top, only to miss a top rope splash. The hot tag brings in Rick but a double headbutt immediately puts him back down. Here’s your awesome spot of the match: Rick gets loaded up in a Doomsday Device position but when Samu dives at him with a cross body, Rick catches him in mid air and powerslams/belly to belly suplexes him off Fatu’s shoulders and down. AWESOME looking move and they hit it perfectly. Scott hits a belly to belly on Fatu but Samu hits a superkick to take him right back down. Out of NOWHERE Scott hits the Frankensteiner for the pin. Nice bump from a guy that big.

Rating: B. I liked this one as much as I liked the opener which is saying a lot. This probably should have kicked the show off as the spots were hitting better and the fans were popping a lot louder, but I can get why they went with a title match. I’m a Headshrinkers fan so seeing them hold their own against one of the best teams ever is a very fun sight. Good match here and that powerslam was great.

The Steiners didn’t do much in the WWF (other than two forgettable Tag Title reigns), but they did have one masterpiece against Bret and Owen Hart at a taped house show on January 11, 1994.

Steiner Brothers vs. Owen Hart/Bret Hart

Bret and Scott get things going with Scott easily taking Bret down with a double leg. Bret comes back with a nice amateur takedown of his own but Scott SNAPS back up and grabs a spinning toe hold of all things. Again Bret is able to get back to his feet but gets caught in a strong headlock. When the amateur stuff goes to a standstill, Scott just runs Bret over with a shoulder to send him outside. They’re going for the slow build here and for once it’s between teams that could pull that off.

Back in and Owen tries his luck with an arm ringer but Scott easily slams him down. Off to Rick who takes Owen to the mat but Owen spins out and it’s a standoff. I’m not doing their speed on the mat justice. These guys are FLYING down there and it’s awesome stuff. Owen’s leapfrog is countered into a powerslam followed by a wicked German suplex for two. The Harts are getting tossed around like dolls out there. Owen pops up with his spinning wristlock and Germans Rick down for two in a nice showup move.

Back to Scott who gets suplexed for two more but he comes right back with a tiger suplex for a thud and two. Time for Bret vs. Rick with Rick cranking on the arm and Bret not being able to slam his way out of it. Bret slaps the mat but that doesn’t mean anything at this point. Rick bends the arm back as the fans chant for Bret. Back up and Bret finally whips Rick off and knees him in the ribs but misses an elbow drop.

We hit the armbar again but Bret fights out and takes over with a dropkick. A DDT of all things puts Rick down for a few moments but he’s up and punching again. Bret realizes he’s in WAY over his head in a slugout and grabs a sleeper instead. Monsoon thinks it’s a choke as the referee checks the arm but on the third drop, Rick falls into the ropes for the break. Bret uncharacteristically won’t let go until four and Scott isn’t happy at all. The middle rope elbow hits Rick’s boot and the top rope bulldog gets two.

Bret takes the chest first bump into the corner for two and it’s back to Scott. There haven’t been a lot of tags in this match. Scott hits a nice tilt-a-whirl slam for two before avoiding a charging Bret who goes shoulder first into the post. Bret tries to walk it off but has to block a suplex back inside. Instead he suplexes Scott up and over to the floor in a painful looking landing. Scott is holding his knee as it’s back to Owen for a top rope headbutt to the back.

There’s an abdominal stretch and Gorilla is IMMEDIATELY ripping on Owen for using the hold at all on a power guy like Scott. The other commentator Stan Lane (of the Midnight Express) points out how stupid it is to not go after the knee that Scott was holding. Scott is sent into the middle buckle and it’s already back to Bret who doesn’t look all the way recovered from going into the post. A slam gets two on Scott and it’s quickly back to Owen as the pace picks up a bit.

Owen whips Scott into the ropes and knocks Bret off the apron in a nice little callback to Survivor Series 1993. Scott gets the hot tag to bring in Rick and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two on Owen. Back to Scott for a dragon suplex and a two count before Rick comes in again for the BIG Steiner Line and two more.

We hit the reverse chinlock but Scott doesn’t care for that kind of lame offense. He comes back in and busts out the STEINER SCREWDRIVER to knock Owen silly. For those of you that have never seen it, it’s a vertical suplex but Scott turns Owen slightly before lifting him into the air and dropping him straight down into a piledriver. It’s very rare to see because most people aren’t crazy enough to take it. Bret makes the save because Owen would have been out for a count of 300 at least.

Scott sends Owen to the floor for some reason but he’s able to slingshot Scott over the top rope and out to the floor. Owen DIVES for a tag to Bret for the Five Moves of Doom but Rick breaks up the Sharpshooter. The other Hart tries to come in but Rick breaks that up as well. The Steiners load up the Steiner Bulldog but Bret makes the save as everything breaks down. Bret and Rick are knocked to the floor but Scott dives off the top with a double ax handle. Owen adds a pescado and it’s finally a double countout to end it.

Rating: A+. That might be the best tag match the WWF ever had, and that covers a lot of ground. This was a chess match with both teams being amateur masters so it was the Harts’ speed against the Steiners’ power, which is the best possible combination. I also really like that there were no winners as this was one of those rare matches where neither team deserved to lose. Absolutely outstanding stuff here that might actually be better than Austin/HHH vs. Benoit/Jericho and TLC 2. Let that sink in for a minute and then GO WATCH THIS.

The brawl keeps going for a bit until they finally separate. Scott gets the mic and says let’s keep it going so here come the Canadians. The right is on again until a bunch of referees come out to break it up again. They go at it a third time and Gorilla sees Pat Patterson. “OH BOY DID HE GET FAT!” The delivery of that was hilarious. The Steiners are finally put out of the ring but now Bret gets the mic and says they’re not going anywhere so it starts up all over again. They’re FINALLY separated and everybody shakes hands.

Rick and Scott pretty much disappeared from the WWF a few months after this and would wind up in ECW about a year later, debuting at a house show on July 28, 1998.

Steiner Brothers vs. Vampire Warrior/Dudley Dudley

Vampire Warrior is more famous as Gangrel. Scott and Dudley get things going with the guy you’ve probably heard of throwing Dudley around with ease twice in a row. A butterfly powerbomb sends Dudley running for the corner and it’s off to the Warrior and Rick. The Steiners are WAY over here. The Warrior gets in some chops to start but walks into a BIG powerslam to stop him cold.

Some double teaming slows Rick down for a bit and it’s back to Dudley for some lame shots to the back and a neckbreaker for two. More double teaming ensues but Dudley jumps into Rick’s boot. Hot tag brings in Scott and house is immediately cleaned as Scott busts out a bunch of suplexes. The Steiner bulldog ends the Warrior with ease.

Rating: D+. We’ll file this one under “what else were you expecting?” The Steiners were still an awesome team at this point and two of the guys that could hang with anyone in the ring. Back when he was on his game, there wasn’t much more fun to watch than Scott Steiner throwing people around like they were nothing.

This one didn’t last long either and it was off to WCW again, but not much happened in 1996. The following year brought a LONG feud with the Outsiders that saw the Steiners win the Tag Titles a few times. Here’s one of their final matches, from February 9, 1998 on Nitro.

Tag Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Outsiders

The Outsiders are defending. For the sake of simplicity, Scott Steiner will be referred to as Scott and Scott Hall will be referred to as Hall. Tony says Sting may be injured after that attack. Rick starts with Hall and the challengers take over early on. It’s off to Scott but Hall blocks a belly to belly suplex and hooks a chokeslam. Scott pops back up and hits an overhead belly to belly to take Hall down. Scott has to go after Nash and Hall takes his head off with a clothesline.

Nash gets the tag and fires off the big knee lifts in the corner to keep Scott in trouble. There’s the choke with the foot and it’s back to Hall for the fallaway slam. Back to Nash for some posing and a big boot to the face for no cover. Hall hooks the abdominal stretch before slapping the back of Scott’s head. Nash comes back in and teases the Jackknife but elbows Scott in the head instead. Back to Hall who walks into a side slam but leverages Scott into Rick, knocking the legal Rick to the floor. Hall loads up the Edge on Scott but Rick comes in with the top rope bulldog for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C. The match was a standard formula tag match but the ending felt very rushed. It was interesting to see Scott take the long beating instead of Rick for a change and the match was at least different than the usual encounters between these teams. At the same time though, can we PLEASE get another team to hold the titles? It’s been a year and a half and one other team has held the titles, with a reign of less than a day.

That was about it for the Brothers as they would split up less than a month later and pretty much be done for about ten years. Rick would work in Japan before shifting towards a real world job while Scott would be a singles star. They would however reunite in TNA in 2007, including a dream match against the Dudley Boys at Bound For Glory 2007.

Steiner Brothers vs. Team 3D

They point out that the Steiners now reside in Atlanta to HAMMER in the face push. Big brawl to start as you have to get two table put throughs out of three to win this. Well it’s better than a regular table match. I’m not sure how but it prevents winning on a fluke I guess. Rick thankfully is in a shirt as we get the Steiner pose. The Dudleys try to leave and that goes nowhere.

Beer to the face of D-Von as they’re in the crowd. Granted this isn’t so much a waste of time as you can go through a table anywhere. Big brawl in the stands where not a lot is going on as there are no tables in sight. Scott and Bubba are brawling as are the other pair. There’s the first table brought in but it’s not set up yet. We’re back around the ring now.

In the ring now and Rick goes through one on a 3D. Scott is on the floor and there aren’t any eliminations it seems which I like better. Scott fights out of a super bomb and hits a Frankensteiner where he does nothing and Bubba has to jump for the flip, hitting the back of his head on the edge, more or less breaking through the table with his neck. FREAKING OW MAN.

It’s tied up at one here as D-Von misses a splash. How was Steiner a world champion in WCW? I think you can count him as another example of a guy making money and getting as far as he did because WCW was in the place it was rather than his talent. Bubba whips Scott with a big leather belt as Rick has apparently disappeared.

Scott is put on a table and it just kind of collapses which doesn’t count as it’s not a guy being put through it which makes sense. Scott has his beard braided which looks stupid. The Dudleys put him on another table and go for his injured throat. The Guns run down for the save. D-Von misses a chair shot and the Steiner Bulldog ends it.

Rating: D+. Well they were trying out there but it didn’t work that well. The two old teams going at it were supposed to comprise a dream match but it didn’t work. Why should I want to see either of these teams rather than the Guns who had a run in here? It’s more old guys that aren’t worth much doing their thing. That’s rarely a good thing and this was no exception. Having the 2/3 thing was a nice little twist though and it helped it a good deal.

If the Road Warrios were all about dominance, the Steiner Brothers were all about beating the tar out of people with raw power and technical abilities. They were untouchable in the late 80s and early 90s and had some of the best matches with anyone they ever fought. Those matches against Bret/Owen and Sting/Luger are as good of a pair of tag matches as you’ll ever see.

Scott Steiner was the closest thing to a Brock Lesnar that WCW ever had and could have been the world champion if he hadn’t injured his arm. I mean that literally, as Flair basically said name the time and the place and I’ll drop the title to him. Go watch these guys from their primes if you’ve never seen their work. They’re a top five tag team ever at worst and maybe even the best of all time. Not a lot of teams can say that but the Steiners certainly can.

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Wrestler of the Day – January 26: Legion of Doom

Today we’ve got a tag team for wrestler of the day. Actually scratch that. We have THE tag team for wrestler of the day: the Road Warriors.

And no, not Heidenreich. It’s just Animal and Hawk.

The team got its start as part of a large stable called the Legion of Doom but soon became a stand alone tag team with the same name. Their first stomping grounds were in Georgia Championship Wrestling which is where they were based when this first match took place, though this is during a visit to Mid-South. Based on the commentary, this comes from some point between July 24, 1983 and October 12, 1983.

Legion of Doom vs. Rick Rood/Art Crews

I think you know the first jobber, but the second is a territory guy who was the winner of Shawn Michaels’ first ever match. The Warriors charge the jobbers to start but Rick actually cranks away on the arm to take over early on. The jobbers take over on the arms until Hawk just DESTROYS Crews with hard forearms to the back. Animal comes in for a double clothesline that sends Art to the floor before a powerslam is enough to pin Crews. Not as squashy as I expected but the idea was clear.

The Road Warriors went north to the AWA and quickly won the Tag Titles there. Their squashes were awesome enough that they became faces through pure crowd reaction and they didn’t look back for years. Here’s one of their title defenses from SuperClash on April 20, 1985.

AWA Tag Titles: Freebirds vs. Road Warriors

The Warriors are defending. This is Hayes/Gordy and they have their faces painted with the Confederate Flag. The champs clear the ring before the bell and are mad over because this is in Chicago. Hawk and Gordy start as Hayes walks around the field with people yelling at him. Hawk pounds on Terry so Terry heads off to bring in Hayes. Off to Animal as the Birds stall. Ok it’s Animal vs. Gordy.

 

The squashing continues with the Warriors taking their shots at Gordy. Michael comes back in again and gets pounded so much he crawls back to Gordy for a tag. Terry is like uh….not right now. Gordy finally wakes up and goes after the eyes before dodging a charging Hawk to send his shoulder into the post. Hayes comes back in and hits a side suplex for two. Piledriver by Gordy mostly works but Hawk doesn’t feel like selling that much.

 

Hayes goes up but Hawk slams him off the top but manages to tag before Hawk can. That’s kind of impressive. Gordy and Hawk collide but there’s the hot one to Animal. Hayes stays on the apron as Animal destroys Gordy, getting two off a powerslam. Everything breaks down and even Roberts and Ellering come in. Ellering gets dropped with a chair and Gordy accidentally pops Hayes. Powerslam to Hayes by Animal and a shoulder to Gordy looks to finish but Hayes comes off the middle rope with something around his hand to knock Animal out for the pin and the titles! The place is stunned.

 

Rating: D+. This one didn’t quite work either. The whole match was a mess and the ending was hard to follow due to everything going all nuts. The Warriors were still in the period where they would do nothing but run people over, which ran for about the next six or eight years. Bad match for the most part, but you know what’s coming.

Not that it matters though as Verne Gagne comes out and says hold on a minute. He reverses the decision and the Warriors get the titles back.

Soon after this it was off to the big time with the NWA where they entered and made it to the finals of the first ever Jim Crockett Senior Memorial Tag Team Tournament. Here’s that final match against Magnum T.A./Ronnie Garvin.

Crockett Cup Finals: Road Warriors vs. Magnum TA/Ronnie Garvin

 

All faces here. The winners also get a million dollars. Animal and Magnum get things going. We get some surprisingly quick stuff until Magnum takes over with a dropkick. Animal takes him down with a top wristlock and they trade arm work on the mat. Off to Hawk who puts on a chinlock….and they clip this match too. ARE YOU SERIOUS???? The whole show is about one freaking tournament and you give us a total of ONE MATCH THAT ISN’T CLIPPED??? ARE YOU KIDDING ME???

 

A middle rope splash misses and Garvin gets a small package for two. Off to Magnum who doesn’t have as much luck with Animal who stomps away on the US Champion. Off to Animal again and it’s chinlock time. Powerslam gets two as Magnum is in trouble. Magnum grabs the belly to belly for two as Hawk saves. Hot tag to Garvin and down he goes almost immediately.

 

Garvin tries an abdominal stretch on Hawk but punches Hawk instead. The problem with this is he punches Hawk so hard that he breaks his hand. I’m not sure if this is kayfabe or real but it doesn’t really matter either way as Animal hits a pretty weak clothesline on Garvin and gets a quick pin for the tournament win and the million bucks.

 

Rating: D+. Apparently Garvin’s hand was broken coming in. Imagine that: Ronnie Garvin does something stupid like HIT A GUY IN THE HEAD WHILE HE HAS A BROKEN HAND. Garvin’s team deserves to lose after that. This match was pretty boring and the ending didn’t help things at all. Nothing to see here other than the end of a long and boring show.

There’s another match that has to be mentioned just due to how famous it is around the time. It’s from Starrcade 1986 and it’s a scaffold match.

Midnight Express vs. Road Warriors

 

This is the scaffold match, meaning there’s a scaffold about fifteen feet above the ring and you have to knock your opponents off to win. The Express is Bobby Eaton and Dennis Condrey and they have Cornette and Bubba with them. On the other hand we have Hawk and Animal, the Road Warriors. These two were BEASTS who were basically indestructable and insanely popular.

 

Condrey thinks about going up to face the Warriors but climbs back down because he’s not that crazy. Cornette, who is legitimately terrified of heights, goes on a rant about how this isn’t civilized. Dennis and Bobby finally get up top and the punishment begins. The scaffold is maybe three feet wide and there are no railings on it at all so they can barely move up there. There are some railings at either end so at least there’s some safety up there.

 

The Express throws powder in the Warriors’ eyes to blind them which is pretty terrifying this high up. Hawk’s legs go over the edge but he crawls back up. Animal is laying down with one leg dangling over and Bobby winds up hanging from said leg. He manages to swing back over to the structure and climb back up as this continues. Condrey is cut open and tries to climb down the ladder but he gets rammed into the scaffold for his efforts by Hawk.

 

Condrey and Hawk get under the scaffold and kick at each other with Condrey trying to monkey bar away. Animal and Bobby join them and a few moments later the Express get kicked down, giving the Road Warriors the win. As someone who is scared of heights, my stomach can now calm down.

 

Rating: D+. This is a hard one to grade as it’s hard to criticize them for moving around so slowly given the fear of potential death involved. There’s only so much you can do that high in the air with no safety rails and they did as much as they could have. The Road Warriors would move on to feuding with the Horsemen soon after this.

 

Post match we get the famous part of the match as Cornette goes up top and runs into Animal. Cornette tries to climb down and winds up hanging from the bottom of the scaffold. He drops down…and Bubba isn’t there to catch him. Jim lands on his legs and basically destroys both of them, causing him problems for the rest of his life. Cornette tries to shout to Bubba to carry him to the back because his legs don’t work but his legs are so destroyed that he can’t get his point across. Animal later said in interviews that it was the funniest thing he’s ever seen.

Soon after this the Road Warriors moved onto the highest profile feud of their careers: teaming with Magnum TA and Dusty Rhodes to fight the Horsemen. One of the biggest matches of that feud would be for the World Tag Team Titles against Arn Adnerson and Tully Blanchard in the Warriors’ hometown of Chicago at Starrcade 1987.

Tag Titles: Arn Anderson/Tully Blanchard vs. Road Warriors

 

The Warriors are challenging in their hometown of Chicago. Arn and Hawk start things off with Hawk taking him down via a top wristlock. Anderson is sent to the floor for a staredown with the Warriors’ manager Paul Ellering. Off to Tully who is almost immediately sent to the floor. Animal will have none of this stalling though and sends him right back inside. Hawk pounds away even more and hits a dropkick for a quick near fall.

 

Off to Animal who catches Blanchard coming in off the top in a powerslam for another two count. Arn comes back in and manages to avoid a charge in the corner, only to have his head taken off by a clothesline from Animal. Blanchard tries to come in but gets punched right in the jaw as well. Both Horsemen try to go after Hawk, only to get clotheslined down for a near fall on Blanchard. Total dominance by the Warriors so far.

 

Back to Animal for a bearhug plus a right hand from Hawk. Animal drops Tully down and Blanchard goes bailing to the corner. A dropkick to the ribs puts Blanchard down again so he tags in Anderson. Animal has to chase Arn on the floor before coming back inside to gorilla press him down. A press slam on Tully by Hawk is broken up by Arn hitting Hawk in the knee and the Horsemen FINALLY take over.

 

Tully adds in a chair shot to Hawk’s knee on the floor and a DDT gets two for Arn back in the ring. Blanchard’s figure four is countered into a small package so Tully pounds on the knee a bit more instead. Arn’s spinning toehold is broken up but here’s Tully again for the figure four. For some reason he tags in Anderson with Hawk still in the hold, and it’s Anderson who gets crotched to allow the hot tag to Animal. Everything breaks down and Tully accidentally knocks the referee to the floor before Hawk throws Anderson the floor. Back in and there’s the Doomsday Device on Arn for the pin and the titles.

 

Rating: C. This took awhile to get going but once the Road Warriors got rolling it got awesome in a hurry. They’re such a physical and dominant team that it’s almost impossible to not get fired up watching them. The leg work here by the Horsemen was much more interesting than say the arm work by Taylor, as they have the size and ability to make you believe the Warriors were in trouble.

 

Oh and scratch that title change because Anderson was thrown over the top, meaning the Warriors are disqualified and the Horsemen keep the belts. Say it with me: Dusty Finish. The fans boo this out of the building and with good reason. Who does this help? The Warriors look inept because they didn’t get the win, the Horsemen look like weak champions because they got pinned, and the fans are mad because at STARRCADE we can’t change the belts. Just a dumb idea all around.

With nothing else to do and still no NWA World Tag Team Titles, the Warriors turned heel and received a title match against the Midnight Express on October 29, 1988.

Tag Titles: Midnight Express vs. Road Warriors

It’s Bobby Eaton/Stan Lane here. The Warriors jump them to start and ram both champions face first into the post. We finally start with Lane firing off all his karate offense to slow down Animal as Hawk just beats the fire out of Eaton on the floor. Lane does everything he can in the ring and we finally get down to Animal starting for the challengers.

Cornette cheats for the champions to give Lane a breather but the Road Warriors easily pound him down to take over. A Hart Attack puts Stan down and Hawk adds a powerslam as Eaton can’t even get to his feet. Animal drops a series of elbows as Eaton falls off the apron in agony. A big shoulder block sends Lane flying to the corner and Bobby tags himself in and unloads on Animal in the corner. Animal totally no sells it and clotheslines Eaton’s head off for the pin and the titles in less than five minutes.

Rating: C-. If there’s a bigger squash than this it must be growing in a field somewhere. This was pure dominance with the Midnights having one quick flurry and nothing more in the entire match. This was about giving the Warriors the titles they had never been able to get before in as easy of a fashion as possible. Total destruction of the Midnights here.

Again the heel turn didn’t last long as the Warriors were so dominant that the fans loved their violence. Most of 1989 was spent beating up the Samoan Swat Team and the Skyscrapers so it was off to the WWF in 1990. Their first feud was against Demolition but the closest thing we ever got to a big showdown was in the opening match of the 1990 Survivor Series.

The Warriors vs. The Perfect Team

Ultimate Warrior, Texas Tornado, Legion of Doom

Mr. Perfect, Demolition

I guess this team isn’t as Ultimate as last year. This is the three man version of Demolition. Perfect is feuding with Tornado (Kerry Von Erich, the IC Champion) and the LOD is feuding with Demolition after the LOD cost them the titles. Warrior, the world champion, is there because he has nothing else to do. His team is in the back before the match and says they’ll win. Actually the name Warriors is appropriate as you have the Ultimate Warrior, the Modern Day Warrior (Von Erich’s nickname in WCCW) and the Road Warriors (the LOD’s NWA name).

I’ll never get why the LOD and Demolition never had a big proper match. They fought on house shows but that’s about it. Perfect immediately goes to the apron and lets part of Demolition start. It’s Animal vs. Smash first and they fight immediately with Animal taking him to the mat. Animal throws him into Hawk for a right hand and the other Warriors get in a shot as well.

Smash comes back with a powerslam for two and it’s off to Perfect. That doesn’t last long so here’s Smash again, and he walks right into a powerslam. Everything breaks down and the Warriors clear the ring. Tornado comes in to face Smash who is taking a beating in this so far. Off to Ax who has much better luck for about ten seconds. There’s the Claw http://purchasepropecia.net from Tornado but for some reason Warrior gets the tag and hits a series of awkward looking shoulder blocks before finishing Ax with the splash.

Crush immediately comes in to jump Warrior and take over. Smash comes in to slam Warrior and Crush drops a top rope knee for two. Perfect is freaking out in his trademark over the top style. Warrior gets up a boot in the corner and clotheslines Crush down. Off to Hawk who always looks like he could murder someone in the ring. Perfect tries him out and is immediately slammed down.

Hawk counters a reversal to send Perfect into the corner but Bird Man’s shoulder goes into the post HARD to give the evil ones the advantage. Demolition pounds away on him but Hawk punches right back. A big flying shoulder puts Smash down and Hawk doesn’t tag when he has the chance. The top rope clothesline kills Smash and everything breaks down. Hawk kicks the referee and somehow this disqualifies Hawk, Animal, Smash and Crush. We’re down to Perfect vs. Warrior/Tornado.

It’s going to be Warrior starting the handicap match but Perfect wants Tornado instead. Perfect immediately jumps him and is clotheslined out almost immediately after the jumping. Warrior bangs Perfect’s head into Heenan’s and sends Bobby into the front row. Tornado charges at Perfect and slams into the post to give Perfect the advantage for a bit. A buckle gets exposed somewhere in there and after Tornado’s face goes into it, the Perfectplex makes it one on one.

Perfect tries the Plex again on Warrior which doesn’t work at all. Instead he hammers Warrior down and hits a great looking dropkick for two. Having Perfect run things out there for as long as possible is the best idea they’ve got. Warrior starts grabbing the ropes and shrugging off all the offense from Perfect. A shoulder block and the splash get the final pin.

Rating: D. This was probably the worst Survivor Series match so far in the four years they’ve been running this show. Not only was the match lopsided from the start, but half of the people in it were gone seven minutes in. Perfect never had a chance and Warrior had no reason to be in this match at all.

The next step for the Warriors was obvious: the Tag Titles with their shot coming against the Nasty Boys at Summerslam 1991.

Tag Titles: Nasty Boys vs. Legion of Doom

The Nasties are defending and this is No Countout/No DQ, making it a street fight in modern terms. The champions are sent to the floor and the fight is on early. Back in the ring Animal hits a quick powerbomb on Knobbs for two followed by Hawk enziguring Sags down. We get down to the stupid tagging part of the street fight with Sags sending Hawk to the floor and hitting him with a bucket of water.

Back in and Knobbs works over Hawk in the corner before Sags sends him into the steps. A back elbow gets two for Knobbs and a top rope version gets the same for Sags. Brian goes up top again but jumps into Hawk’s boot, finally allowing for the hot tag off to Animal. Everything breaks down and Sags hits Animal in the back with Jimmy’s helmet for two. Hawk steals the helmet and lays out both Nasties, setting up the Doomsday Device on Sags for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. This SUCKED as the street fight rule was barely used at all. It was little more than a few shots with the helmet when the referee wasn’t looking anyway. Hawk and Animal barely broke a sweat out there as they were already talking about the Natural Disasters earlier tonight instead of worrying about winning the belts. This win was a long time coming though.

The reign wouldn’t last long as they would drop the titles in an untaped match at a house show in February of 1992. It was clear that Hawk was about to go nuts due to personal issues and Vince wanted to get the belts off of them as fast as they could. After about six months away they would return in the fall, only to be gone again immediately after Summerslam when Hawk walked out.

After a few years in Japan it was back to WCW, where they participated in a Chicago Street Fight at Uncensored 1996 in Tupelo, Mississippi for the Tag Team Titles against one half of the champions Sting and his partner Booker T. Somehow this was the second most confusing match of the show.

Chicago Street Fight; Road Warriors vs. Booker T/Sting

Now say it with me: a Chicago street fight is happening in MISSISSIPPI. The idea here is that if Booker and Sting win here, Harlem Heat gets a title shot. I think the belts are on the line here but it’s never made clear, at least not so far. This is Booker’s dry run for a singles push, which obviously went well as he won his first TV Title a year and a half later. Yeah the NWO REALLY threw a lot of stuff off.

Naturally it’s a brawl to start and they’re already on the floor. We go split screen here which is a good idea. Granted then they have just two separate shots of the same thing and I continue to wonder how they stayed in business as long as they did. Tony must be drunk because he makes a good point, saying that these kinds of matches should have two referees. Aside from pointing out the stupidity of the higher ups with them allowing such an idiotic move, that’s very accurate.

Sting and Animal trade low blows on the post because that’s very normal. We switch back to the split screen, now complete with a graphic reminding us that this is the Chicago Street Fight. In yet another great moment from Bobby, he says that instead of covering someone that’s down, you go through his pockets and look for cash, jewelry, watches, etc. I love Heenan.

The wrestlers can apparently get away with murder, but they can get disqualified. I love wrestling. It’s Booker and Animal in the ring and Sting and Hawk, who is also an animal but whatever, with Sting in the aisle. Hawk can throw a freaking dropkick when he has to. That was impressive. Sting gets a chair and hits some absolutely laughably bad shots with it. However, they’re divine ones compared to the ones that Animal hits the faces with.

How weird is it that the Road Warriors are the heels in a match? Those shots were just awful though. I think I’ve seen Rey throw harder ones. Hawk no sells a piledriver. Really? How do you not sell a freaking piledriver? You’re dropped on your head for goodness’ sake. The stupid stuff continues as we have a chinlock in a street fight. Oh yeah work that chin! Heenan says that Animal or Hawk need to get with their partner and say something to them.

The thing he says takes him 11 seconds to say. It’s not really funny, but there’s something that’s just great about that. They hit the stands for about a second and we have the second instance tonight of the chairs being in big rows for no apparent reason. Why do they insist on using two camera for the same shot? I love wrestling at times, but this makes my head hurt.

Apparently this is non title, so therefore Sting can’t lose his title and can only get hurt, the Road Warriors have nothing to gain, and Booker can get a title shot. Why are the three not named Booker here? Sting and Hawk are in the ring and Booker and Animal are near the cage. They set for the Doomsday Device but Booker makes the save by crocthing Animal (who usually doesn’t go up top).

This prompts Dusty to say E.T. phone home. I gave up on trying to figure this out a long time ago. Sting hits the fifth low blow in 15 minutes. I wish they would make a reference to Sting and Dusty teaming up to fight the Road Warriors at Starrcade 87. Just as I say that, Bobby asks Dusty what he would do if he were Sting’s partner in this case. I wish he would have said that he was and left it at that but no go.

The spinaroonie is known as the whirly bird here. I’d love to see Sting against RVD in a jumping contest. It would be a very interesting challenge. Apparently the fans are standing everywhere. They must be about an average of 4ft tall because they look like they’re sitting to me, but then again I’m no professional announcer. Booker hits low blow #6.

Tony, continuing his brilliant career as an announcer, points out that they haven’t done anything incredibly extreme and this has really just been as basic as possible. Thanks for pointing out that this isn’t as great as it was built up to be and giving us no reason to believe the hype on future PPVs. I think I’ve finally started figuring out the problem that I have with this commentary team: I don’t know what they’re saying and it just passes through my head as being fine.

Bobby and Dusty are talking about glomming someone. What the heck does that mean? I guess it means double teaming, but it could mean sharing a turkey sandwich and a white wine for all I know. I will give them this: they’ve managed to keep going with the singles and team fighting. That’s hard to do but they’re pulling it off here.

Off a top rope powerslam, Bobby says Sting landed on his shoulder like Apollo 13. THAT DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE!!! What in the world is that supposed to mean? It’s like just random gibberish that sounds good. What the heck does Apollo freaking 13 have to do with this match and how in the world does it relate to a guy landing on his shoulder? Animal follows it up with even more weak chair shots. Uh oh, a weak clothesline hits the post.

The weapons shots here just flat out suck. Hawk just somehow managed to hit Sting with the side of the chair facing Hawk when he swung it. That’s hard to do. Sting then leaves his partner alone to go get some plunder (which I figured out means weapons). He comes back with….brooms. Yep, he’s got brooms. Even Tony sounds annoyed with this match as we’re well past 20 minutes here which is mainly just stupid stuff where they look tired.

Now instead of hitting Hawk with the wooden handle of the broom, he hits him with the straw. Yep, that’s what he did. Animal apparently noggered Booker. There’s a new language being formed here. Bobby makes a vacuum reference for no apparent reason. They trash Luger some more as it occurs to me that Dusty has fought him at Starrcade as well. Hey WCW: GET NEW TALENT!

Booker apparently walks out with Animal following him so we hit the split screen again. Animal and Booker fight in the back even more with Luger there. Animal accidentally hits Luger and knocks him into some trash, which ticks him off of course. With a Viking like yell he runs at Animal and takes him out. Stevie Ray, Booker’s partner, shows up and along with Jimmy Hart they beat the tar out of Animal and tie him to a post.

In the ring, Hawk is beating the crap out of Sting which is odd to see indeed. Sting goes into his insane offense that works better than anything else. Booker is back now as it’s all faces here. Stevie runs out to hit another crap chair shot to end this. Right after the pin we cut to Animal who is screaming about nothing in particular other than having his face kicked in, being taped to a pole and being handcuffed. I love wrestling!

Rating: D+. This is just hard to grade. The main problem is simple: this went thirty minutes. You could cut at least 15 of that out and this is a B- or so. There’s just way too many dead spots though where it’s just random punches and kicking that get very boring. The street fight aspect of this was awful with only a few chair shots and the broom being in there to do anything at all. Also, it’s not even for the titles. Put Booker in there as a substitute partner. That would have at least given us something close to a reason to care. The brawling was ok, but that’s overshadowed by the pure dullness of about 15 minutes of this.

The Road Warriors would make it back to the WWF for one last run in 1997, staying for about a year and winning the Tag Titles one more time. The magic was gone though and they were more or less living off nostalgia so I’ll skip over this period. There would however be one final appearance for the team on the big stage as a total surprise. From the May 12, 2003 episode of Monday Night Raw.

Raw Tag Titles: Kane/Rob Van Dam vs. Legion of Doom

Animal and RVD get things going with Animal stomping away in the corner, only to be kicked in the face to put him down. Off to Hawk who gets kicked as well before hitting his neckbreaker, only to get kicked in the face again. Kane gets the tag and speeds things up with clotheslines to both Doomers. The top rope clothesline drops Hawk but they break up a double chokeslam, only to have RVD kick Animal down and hit Rolling Thunder for two. Animal comes back with a powerbomb to Van Dam but he ducks the clothesline on the Doomsday Device. The chokeslam and Five Star are enough to pin Hawk and retain the titles.

Rating: D+. The match was little more than a squash for the champions but it was nice to see Hawk out there one last time as his old self instead of the shell of a shell that he would become. It’s still not a good match or anything but it wasn’t supposed to be anything close to one.

Hawk would pass away about six months after this but from every report I’ve seen, he was a changed man when it happened.

The idea I was trying to present here was dominance. In their prime, the Road Warriors simply were not going to lose a fair fight. The NWA and AWA Tag Title reigns came to an end due to cheating and the first WWF reign was never allowed to see the light of day. They’re a great example of what can happen when a team is protected. They weren’t a great in ring team but they didn’t need to do anything other than run people over and destroy them with power moves. It worked for the better part of 20 years in every promotion they worked in so there must have been something to it.

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XWF Episode 2 – They Have To Take The Up Escalator To Get To Terrible

XWF Episode 2
Date: November 13, 2001
Location: Universal Studios, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Tony Schiavone

The debut episode of this show was, shall we say, horrible. Unfortunately there’s no time between the tapings to fix those things as these episodes were all taped in a two day span. The only good thing that could come out of this would be those wrestlers aren’t likely to work again on this show…unless those guys were their best. In that case I might be in the need of a well crafted noose. Let’s get to it.

Hart and Knobbs hype up the second episode and recap the first. We need a recap for a show that was on the same DVD set as this one?

This week’s episode opens with another recap of last week’s episode.

Juventud Guerrera/Psychosis vs. Ray Gonzalez/Konnan

Gonzalez is a big deal in Puerto Rico and I’m sure you know everyone else. Konnan and Psychosis get us going with Konnan taking him down four times in a row including twice by armdrags before bringing in Gonzalez. Ray tries to drop down but Guerrera drops an elbow on the back, only to have Gonzalez pop back up and choke Juvy to the mat. Guerrera comes back with a LOUD spinwheel kick before Psychosis comes back in for a double dropkick.

Psychosis gets two off a legdrop and Juvy gets the same off a springboard version of the same move. Ray comes back with an enziguri to Juvy and it’s hot tag to Konnan who speeds things up. A DDT puts Psychosis down and a double hiptoss gets two on Juvy. Guerrera comes right back with the Juvy driver to Ray but Konnan breaks up the 450, allowing Gonzalez to hit a swinging neckbreaker on Guerrera for the pin.

Rating: D+. I think the match had the potential to be good but it went by so fast that I could barely tell. This match needed to be about twice as long for the story they were trying to tell which has been the problem for a lot of the matches that this promotion has had so far. It’s ok to give a match more than four minutes and letting it develop.

That’s enough wrestling so here’s Rena Mero (Sable) flanked by security with something to say. She talks about how great this company can be but Gene interrupts her to ask about Roddy Piper overstepping his boundaries in the Hennig vs. Vampiro match last week. Cue Roddy to defend himself (I think, as his music drowns out the start of his speech) and say he’s taken many things into his own hands but Sable hasn’t been one of them…..yet.

She says Piper promised to avoid getting physical but thinks there might be a fire burning under his kilt. Piper rants about something the audio doesn’t pick up until Vampiro comes in. He thanks Sable for her confidence in the locker room’s abilities and Sable says make the most of it. One more thing: Sable wants Piper to hire Josh Matthews from Tough Enough, which gets a pop for some reason. Piper is cool with the idea and makes Matthews vs. Vampiro.

Big Vito wants to fight the best in the XWF.

The South Philly Posse (Public Enemy) walks past a bus stop and hits on a woman who is clearly a hooker.

The announcers talk for a bit until Simon Diamond comes out to yell at Jerry Lawler for his comments about Simon last week. Those comments were so quick that I don’t even remember them but apparently they were about Dawn Marie not having any class. Simon insults Lawler’s chick named Kitten and we’ve got a match.

Jerry Lawler vs. Simon Diamond

Lawler takes him into the corner for right hand but Johnny Swinger runs in for a double team. Jerry gets double teamed but Simon hits Swinger by mistake. Lawler cleans house and piledrives Simon for the pin in about 90 seconds. Again, less than nothing.

Sonny Onoo has a guy named Vapor. These vignettes are maybe ten seconds each.

Hail vs. Knuckles

Knuckles is a jobber who hasn’t seemed to fight anywhere of note other than in the XWF. Corner splash, modified belly to belly superplex, shoulder breaker, legdrop, Hail wins.

AJ Styles promises to prove he’s the best cruiserweight in the XWF. If you think he’s a country hick now, you would be blown away here. He sounds like a guy imitating a country wrestler.

Knobs and Hart recap the other half of last week’s show.

Horace and Greg Valentine are ticked off that they’re not on the card tonight. They complain to Piper who makes Horace vs. Josh Matthews next week.

Johnny B. Badd vs. Norman Smiley

Badd is way slimmer than he was in his WWF days. Smiley shoulder blocks him down and follows up with a hiptoss before stopping for a dance. Badd comes back with a headlock takeover of his own but stops to pose, allowing Norman to score with some uppercuts in the corner. A slam and clothesline drop Johnny for two and we hit the chinlock.

Jerry talks about Norman having a match last week, even though this is the first match we’ve seen him have. Badd fights up but Norman clotheslines him right back down. A delayed butterfly suplex gets two for Norman and it’s off to an abdominal stretch on the mat. Back up and Badd easily picks Norman up for the TKO and the pin.

Rating: D+. I’m having a hard time coming up with stuff to say about these matches. Norman was doing his best amateur and technical stuff out there but Badd literally did nothing but basic moves before hitting the TKO for the win. Nothing to see here, which should be the motto of this company rather than In Your Face.

Drezden is still coming.

Nasty Boys vs. Shane Twins

Since it was SO interesting last week. Actually there are no Nastys but here are some replacements.

Shane Twins vs. Road Warriors

The Warriors jump the Twins to start and again the audio issues flare up as we can’t hear the commentary over the ring noise. Mike and Animal get things going with Animal breaking out of a wristlock and clotheslining Mike down. Off to Hawk for some loud chops which send Mike out to the floor. The fans are entirely behind the LOD here but Mike gets Hawk to chase him back inside and suplexes him down for two.

Hawk is sent shoulder first into the post and out to the floor on his head. Back in and Todd forearms Hawk down for two and pounds away in the corner. Hawk staggers out and collides with Todd to put both guys down, setting up a double tag to Animal and Mike. Animal easily beats up both Shane Twins by himself and there’s the Doomsday Device to Mike but the Nasty Boys hit the ring and pull out the referee for the DQ.

Rating: C-. That’s almost out of pity more than anything else. The match wasn’t anything to see but it’s the longest match of the tapings thus far, running less than four and a half minutes. However, it advances a story and gives us somewhere to go from here so there’s at least something there. It’s going towards Nasty Boys vs. Road Warriors but it’s better than nothing.

The Nasty Boys bail and the Road Warriors raise the Twins’ hands.

Jimmy Snuka and Jimmy Snuka Jr. are here.

Curt Hennig vs. Buff Bagwell

Buff is a face again after doing that mid match heel turn last week. Hennig is sent to the corner so Buff can do his strut while Hennig bails to the floor. Back in and Curt takes Buff into the corner for some loud chops, only to be dropkicked out to the floor. Buff tries to pull him back inside but Curt snaps his throat across the top rope to take over. We hit the nerve hold for a few seconds before it’s off to standard choking.

Buff gets caught in an abdominal stretch but it lasts about ten seconds, just like everything else. A bad looking Boston Crab from Hennig lasts about as long but Bagwell comes back with a jawbreaker and clotheslines. In a bad looking ending, Buff goes to the middle rope for the Blockbuster but Heenan shoves him off the ropes (referee doesn’t care) and into the PerfectPlex (Bagwell’s shoulder was up, referee doesn’t care) for the pin.

Rating: D. WE BROKE FIVE MINUTES!!! Indeed we did but the match sucked. The holds lasting a few seconds at a time got really annoying because there was no reason for Hennig to let them go. He just dropped them like he was playing No Mercy which is stupid in video games and horrible looking in the real world. Horrible looking match.

Post match Vampiro comes out to yell about Heenan but gets beaten down by Curt. Buff makes the save but Ian Harrison comes out to beat up both guys. This brings out Roddy Piper with a chair to make the real save but Sable and her security come out to yell at him to end the show.

Hart and Knobbs wrap it up.

Overall Rating: D-. This show isn’t making me mad, but rather making me wonder how much longer there is to go with it. The show is starting to get some ideas together but none of the ideas are any good. At the end of the day, this is a nostalgia show and not a very good one. These guys weren’t incredibly old at the time, but there was no way they thought this was going to last more than a few months tops. It was somewhat better this time but they had nowhere to go but up.

 

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On This Day: December 26, 1988 – Starrcade 1988: One of the Loudest Pops Ever

Starrcade 1988
Date: December 26, 1988
Location: Norfolk Scope, Norfolk, Virginia
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Bob Caudle

 

In addition to the main event I talked about, the other major match is Sting teaming up with Dusty Rhodes to take on the freshly evil Road Warriors for their newly won tag team titles. The Warriors had turned on Dusty during a six man tag so Dusty went out and got a young star in Sting to team with him. This was a big deal for Sting as in March he had received a world title shot against Flair on live national television, so he was clearly ready for the move to the next level. Let’s get to it.

 

The opening video is about the two major matches already listed along with Barry Windham vs. Bam Bam Bigelow for the US Title.

 

The announcers spend awhile hyping the show.

 

US Tag Titles: Varsity Club vs. Fantastics

 

The Fantastics are defending here and are Tommy Fulton/Bobby Rodgers, as well as my own personal favorite WCW tag team from this era. The Varsity Club on the other hand was a very interesting idea. They’re three guys (Steve Williams, Kevin Sullivan and Mike Rotundo) who were all (well not really in Sullivan’s case) top level collegiate athletes. They had a lot of success in 1988 with Rotundo holding the TV Title for just under a year. This is Williams/Sullivan challenging for the titles.

 

Sullivan and Fulton start things off with the champion speeding things up. A Thesz Press gets two on Kevin and it’s off to Tommy for a backdrop. Williams (also called Dr. Death or Doc) gets the tag and the Fantastics stop cold. Jason Hervey from the Wonder Years is here. Doc powers Rodgers down to the mat as the match slows way down. Off to Fulton who can’t do anything with Williams’ power either. The champions finally start double teaming but Fulton gets caught in a gorilla press with multiple lifts in the air.

 

Fulton comes back with what I think was a dropkick to the ribs followed by a regular dropkick to the face. Williams misses an elbow and it’s back to Tommy with a dropkick of his own. Back to Sullivan who misses a clothesline and falls to the floor. For him, that’s an upgrade over his usual stuff. Back in and Rodgers counters a backdrop and dropkicks Kevin down again. Williams comes back in but gets caught in a double noggin knocker and a double backdrop.

 

Things settle down a bit and Williams rams Tommy face first into the buckle before bringing Sullivan back in. Kevin does little of note (as usual) and tags Doc again for more power brawling. Sullivan comes back and gets rolled up for two as Tommy has far better luck against him than Dr. Death. Williams puts a bearhug on the freshly tagged in Fulton, who pokes Doc in the eye to escape the hold.

 

Back to Rodgers who slams Sullivan off the top but hits knees on a top rope splash. Williams comes back in to run Tommy over, allowing Kevin to get a few near falls. We hit the chinlock on Rodgers before it’s back to Williams for even more punishment. The Varsity Club tags in and out quite well here. Off to another chinlock by Doc before it’s back to Sullivan for a pair of double stomps to the ribs.

 

Tommy finally avoids a knee drop and gets the hot tag off to Fulton. Bobby pounds away on Steve with everything he’s got before putting on a sleeper. Tommy puts one on Sullivan as Bobby charges at Williams, only to get caught in a Hot Shot (picture a spinebuster but Williams falls backwards to drop Bobby’s throat on the top rope) for the pin and the titles.

 

Rating: C+. Not a bad tag match here and they’re getting close to actually having a good opening match for Starrcade. The Varsity Club was on their last legs at this point but winning the titles here was a nice boost for them. Williams looked ready to be a huge star but for some reason it never quite happened.

 

Tony Schiavone and Magnum TA, the hosts for the evening, talk about the remaining matches.

 

Midnight Express vs. Midnight Express

 

This has a very interesting backstory to it. The Midnight Express first formed back in 1981 as a three man team with Dennis Condrey, Randy Rose and Norvell Austin (last mention of him in this discussion). Once the team split up, a man named Bobby Eaton came into the same territory as Condrey and the Midnight Express was reformed as a regular two man tag team. They also picked up Jim Cornette as a manager and became one of the greatest tag teams of all time.

 

A few years later, Dennis left the team and Jim Crockett Promotions with no given explanation (allegedly drug problems but that’s never been confirmed). With Condrey gone, Eaton needed a new partner. A former opponent of his named Stan Lane was brought in and the new combination proved to be even more talented than Condrey and Eaton had been. This is probably the most famous version of the team.

 

Around this time, Condrey and Randy Rose teamed up in the AWA (the midwestern territory) and won their world tag team titles. Soon after dropping the belts, Cornette appealed to the NWA to bring Rose and Condrey back in for a Midnights vs. Midnights feud. Soon after Eaton/Lane lost the world tag titles, Cornette got a phone call laughing about the loss. Apparently Jim recognized the voice and said come say it to his face. Condrey, Rose and their manager Paul E. Dangerously stormed the ring and beat down Lane and Cornette. Tonight is the big brawl between the teams.

 

Eaton and Lane hit the ring fast and the beating is on. Even Cornette wants to fight Paul and the original Midnights head to the floor. Lane and Eaton double suplex Condrey into the ring and the original Midnights are in trouble early on. We finally start with Lane vs. Condrey, the latter of which is sent to the floor. Cornette blasts him in the back with the tennis racket, sending Dangerously into a frenzy.

 

Back in and Lane hits a quick atomic drop on Rose to send him to the floor, stopping things again. Eaton comes in for an elbow drop to Rose’s back as we finally get going. Paul rings the bell for some reason as Eaton knocks Randy out to the floor. Lane continues to clean house, this time sending Condrey into the corner before tagging Eaton back in. It’s totally one sided so far.

 

Eaton and Condrey slug it out with Bobby taking over and dropping a top rope elbow drop for no cover. Back to Stan for a chinlock as things slow down. The fans are totally behind Eaton and Lane here. Eaton comes back in and throws Condrey into the corner for a tag to Randy. Lane blocks a monkey flip from Rose and it’s back to Eaton. Bobby finally misses a charge into the corner, allowing the original Midnights to get in some offense.

 

We hit ten minutes into the match as Rose comes off the middle rope to blast Eaton in the back of the head. Back in and Condrey hits a quick clothesline and some knees to Bobby’s ribs. Cornette chases Paul into the ring but Dangerously gets away. Things calm down with a chinlock by Dennis but Bobby comes back with a swinging neckbreaker. Rose comes back in to break up a hot tag though as the original Midnights maintain control.

 

Off to a front facelock on Eaton with Rose cranking away on his head. Bobby finally backdrops out of it but Condrey comes right in with some more knees to Eaton’s back to keep him down. Back to Rose as Condrey chokes away even more behind the referee’s back. Dennis finally comes back in legally and pounds away on Bobby’s injured ribs but the original Midnights miss the Rocket Launcher (Rose goes up top and Condrey launches him at Eaton in a big splash) allowing for the hot tag to Lane.

 

Stan cleans house and dances a bit before kicking Rose in the back of the head. Everything breaks down and the referee is knocked to the floor. Dangerously nails Lane with his telephone but Cornette takes out Paul. The referee sees the phone and won’t count the pin on Lane as the match continues. With Condrey distracted, the new Midnights hit the Double Goozle (clothesline from Eaton, rollup from Lane) for the pin out of nowhere.

 

Rating: B. Really good and fast paced tag match here as both teams looked sharp. The idea here was very simple and sometimes you don’t need anything more than that. Having the managers get involved was a nice touch and the whole thing worked really well. This was one of the hottest stories in the company for months on end and it’s easy to see why given how crisp things looked here.

 

Post match the original Midnights and Heyman destroy the new Midnights and Cornette. With the originals on Cornette though, Eaton gets the tennis racket and runs them off.

 

The Varsity Club talks about how awesome they are and swears they’ll always be at the top. Oh and Mike Rotundo is going to run Rick Steiner out of wrestling.

 

Russian Assassins vs. Junkyard Dog/Ivan Koloff

 

This is a thrown together tag match and if the Russians lose, they have to unmask. The Dog is recently here from the WWF where he wasn’t a huge deal but he was a big deal in the UWF. Dog starts with we’ll say Assassin #1 and the masked man is sent into the corner for a quick two count. Off to #2 who is almost immediately knocked to the floor with a big right hand. Paul Jones, now a Russian sympathizer, pulls #2’s leg onto the ropes for the break.

 

Off to Ivan with a hard clothesline and he chokes #2 down to the mat with ease. #2 charges into a boot in the corner and there’s a middle rope clothesline from Ivan for two. JYD and Ivan hit a double clothesline on #2 but #2 comes back with a headbutt of his own to put Dog down. Everything breaks down for a bit until Dog gets a near fall on #1 off a clothesline. The Assassins double team JYD but #2 misses a splash in the corner. Ivan comes in to clean house as everything breaks down again. In the confusion, the Russians load up a foreign object in their masks and a headbutt ends Ivan.

 

Rating: D. This wasn’t any good. I have no idea why Ivan and the Dog teamed up for this match and I didn’t even know the Assassins were a team anymore at this point. This came off like a long filler match which isn’t something you should have to use on a card with just seven matches.

 

The announcers wrap up the first three matches for some reason.

 

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Mike Rotundo

 

This should pick things up a bit. The idea here is that Rick used to be in the Varsity Club but was used as a whipping boy by Rotundo for the better part of a year. One day Steiner, whose mind is a bit scrambled because of a car accident he had a few years earlier, got sick of Mike’s treatment of him and suplexed Rotundo into the middle of next week. Rotundo agreed to face Steiner here to embarrass him, because Rotundo claimed that no one could beat him in a twenty minute match, which is the time limit for TV Title matches. Mike is defending if that’s not clear. Kevin Sullivan is locked in a cage hanging from the ceiling.

 

Mike gets knocked out to the floor to start as Rick is really excited early on. Back in and the champion puts on a wristlock but gets caught in a quick fireman’s carry to get us back to a standoff. Rick hooks a headlock for a bit until Mike shoves him away. Steiner is perfectly fine with that and takes Rotundo’s head off with a Steiner Line for two. A drop toehold puts Rick down but he immediately counters into a hammerlock. Steiner has been out wrestling Rotundo the entire time here.

 

Mick finally counters into a headlock on the mat but Rick, the good guy here, pulls the hair to escape. Back up and Steiner puts on a headlock but gets suplexed down by the champion. They head to the mat again with Mike holding Rick down in a headscissors. Apparently that’s too boring for them so it’s back up for some more circling. Rick starts dancing a bit so Mike bails to the floor for a breather.

 

Back in and Rick runs him over again, only to miss a charge and go flying over the top and out to the floor. Mike pounds away with some elbows to the head back inside followed by a kick to the chest. Off to a chinlock by Rotundo for a LONG time as the match slows down again. A hard clothesline puts Steiner down again as the commentary has stopped for some reason. Rick comes back with a sunset flip for two but gets punched in the jaw for his efforts.

 

Rick fights back again and hits a quick Steiner Line to take Rotundo down. Now the commentary is back and Steiner is pounding away on Mike in the corner. A big backdrop puts the champion down and a powerslam gets two. Rick hits the belly to belly suplex but Steve Williams rings the bell. The referee thinks it’s the time limit but we’ve only gone about seventeen minutes out of twenty allotted.

 

The timekeeper tells the referee what happened as Sullivan is lowered. Another referee comes down as well and Sullivan gets on the apron. Steiner rams Rotundo into Sullivan, knocking the champion out. Rick gets the pin (from both referees) and the title, blowing the roof off the place. It’s one of the loudest pops you’ll ever hear anywhere in wrestling.

 

Rating: C-. The match mostly sucked, but man alive the ending to that was awesome. This is a perfect example of how you blow off a story at the biggest show of the year. The fans went NUTS for the ending as they identified with Steiner as someone standing up to a bully and finally getting his revenge on said bully. Rotundo would get the title back in a few weeks, but THIS match was the important moment and it was done perfectly.

 

Rick hits the floor and sprints around the ring, pointing at a confused Rotundo and shouting I BEAT YOU I BEAT YOU I BEAT YOU! He grabs the TV Title and runs out of the arena before Williams can kill him as the fans come unglued. This is one of those moments where if you don’t smile just a little bit, odds are you don’t have a soul.

 

Tony and Magnum talk about what we just saw and the remainder of the card.

 

US Title: Barry Windham vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

 

Bigelow is a four hundred pound bald monster covered in tattoos who wrestles like he’s about a hundred and fifty pounds lighter. Windham is a Horseman and defending here. Bigelow has Oliver Humperdink with him who was a lower level manager in the 80s while Barry has JJ Dillon who I’m sure you’ve heard of by now. Feeling out process to start with neither guy doing much in the early going. Barry takes it into the corner for some big right hands but Bigelow comes back with an airplane spin of all things.

 

The champion bails to the floor for a timeout before coming back in to suplex Bigelow down. Bam Bam pops back up and drills Windham in the face with a clothesline to send him outside again. Back in again and Bigelow runs Barry down one more time as Windham has no idea what to do here. A HUGE gorilla press puts Windham on the floor again as this has been one sided so far.

 

Bam Bam pounds away in the corner and Windham falls flat on his face. A dropkick sends Windham out to the floor as the fans are going nuts. Bigelow suplexes him down for two and it’s off to a chinlock. Barry fights up and finally gets in some shots to the ribs. Bigelow is knocked to the floor and lands on his knee to really slow him up. They head back in with Bam Bam knocking Barry down from the apron and hitting a slingshot splash. Bigelow lets him up for some reason before slamming Barry down, only to miss the top rope splash.

 

Windham lariats him down and is all fired up now. A belly to back suplex puts Bam Bam down in an impressive display of strength. Barry pounds down right hands in the corner and launches Bigelow out to the floor. Back in and there’s Windham’s claw hold for a bit until Bigelow staggers into the corner for the break. Bigelow is slammed down but Barry misses a top rope elbow. Bam Bam starts pounding away and charges into Barry, knocking both guys over the top and out to the floor. Barry rams him into the post and Bigelow can’t make it back in before the ten count.

 

Rating: B-. This was a big power brawl and it worked pretty well for the most part. The ending is lame but I guess the idea was to keep Bigelow looking strong. That’s rather odd given that Bigelow was pretty much gone from the company after this. Bam Bam looked good here though and we got a good match out of these two so this was a solid effort.

 

Rick Steiner says he got tired of the Varsity Club calling him stupid. Apparently his friend Alex promised him cake. Alex would be his hand puppet.

 

Tag Titles: Road Warriors vs. Dusty Rhodes/Sting

 

So a few weeks before this, the Road Warriors had turned heel on Dusty and tried to blind him with one of the spikes from their shoulder pads. With Dusty down, they had also gone after Sting, setting up this match for revenge. The Warriors also mauled the Midnight Express for the tag titles so the belts are on the line also. It’s a short but simple story and that’s all it needed to be.

 

Sting and Animal get things going and Sting isn’t used to not being the strong one. Animal runs him over but Sting comes right back with a dropkick to send Animal to the floor. The problem with the angle is apparent very early: the fans love all four guys. The Road Warriors had a huge heel turn but they were so beloved that no one wanted to boo them. Dusty comes in to crank on the arm but instead goes after Animal’s eye to send him to the floor.

 

Off to Hawk vs. Sting with the challenger cranking on the arm again. Hawk is WAY too muscled for that to have much effect though and he punches his way out of it. He stomps Sting down in the corner and fires off lefts and rights but one HUGE right hand from Sting drops Hawk. You’ll probably never see that happen again. There’s a powerslam on Hawk and it’s back to Animal for an easy gorilla press on Sting.

 

Sting knocks Animal right back to the floor and hits a huge dive off the top to take him down. The crowd loves Sting and with good reason: he has so much charisma he can barely contain it. Off to Dusty who wraps Animal’s leg around the post but like an idiot, Dusty allows the tag off to Hawk. Dusty loads up his awful figure four on Hawk but Animal saves the hold from being butchered again. Hawk knocks Dusty to the floor and stomps away before heading back in for punches to the jaw.

 

Dusty comes back with a dropkick to stagger Hawk but Animal comes right back in and chokes Rhodes down. Off to a neck crank by Animal as the Dusty portion of this match continues to be a letdown. Hawk comes back in with a sleeper and Dusty continues his “stand around and look annoyed” style of selling. A jawbreaker lets Dusty out of the hold and thank goodness we get the tag off to Sting. He dropkicks Animal into the corner and hits the Stinger Splash but Hawk breaks up the Scorpion Deathlock. Everything breaks down and Sting hits a top rope crossbody, but Paul Ellering pulls the referee out for the DQ.

 

Rating: C. The dilemma of this match is simple: when Dusty is in there it’s dull and when Sting is in there it’s good. The other problem here though is that there was no way they could live up to the hype of this match. This was built up as a dream match and rarely do those things ever work. Also it never felt like Sting and Dusty were out for vengeance with Dusty looking bored out there for awhile. Not that any of this mattered as Dusty would be fired soon after for the excessive blood used in the attack that led up to this feud.

 

NWA World Title: Ric Flair vs. Lex Luger

 

Speaking of Dusty being fired, since he knew that he was going to be gone as both a wrestler and the booker soon after this, he tried to mess with his real life rival Ric Flair before leaving. The original plan for this match was to have the Varsity Club jump Luger and have Rick Steiner, who remember is basically mentally handicapped, beat Flair for the world title in five minutes. As you can guess, that’s not what happens but it’s an example of what happens when personal issues get in the way of the booking.

 

If Flair is disqualified here, he loses the title. Flair WOO’s in Luger’s face to start before strutting around a bit. No contact in the first minute or so. Flair hits some chops before being clotheslined out to the floor by the much stronger Luger. Legendary wrestler Lou Thesz is in the audience. Back in and Flair tries a hammerlock but is easily overpowered into the ropes.

 

Another clothesline puts Flair down and he hides in the corner for a breather. A powerslam puts Ric down again and there’s a gorilla press for good measure. Off to a wristlock by Luger before he no sells a chop. Flair is sent arm first into the buckle and it’s off to a hammerlock by the challenger. Back up and Ric FINALLY pokes him in the eye to get himself a breather. Flair tries the chops again and Luger just yells at him. Those chops never worked on guys like Luger and Sting but Flair never learned.

 

They head to the floor with Luger cranking Flair’s arm around the barricade to injure it even more. Back to the armbar by Luger as this has been one sided so far. Back up and another clothesline puts Flair down for one and Flair rolls to the apron. There’s a suplex back inside for another near fall on the champion. Luger isn’t getting frustrated yet but he misses a jumping elbow drop to slow him down.

 

Back to the floor with Flair sending him face first into the barricade and chopping away which actually has an effect now. They go back inside and Flair stomps on the ribs but tries more chops which just wake Luger up. Lex puts on a sleeper but gets suplexed right back down to give both guys a breather. The Figure Four is countered into a small package for two by the challenger, followed by a superplex for two more.

 

Now Luger puts the figure four on Flair but the champion eventually makes it into the ropes. Lex pounds away in the corner but accidentally knocks the referee down. Flair uses the distraction to rake Luger’s eyes and throw him over the top, but Luger dives back in for a clothesline for two. Lex pounds away in the corner and sends him into the other corner for the Flair Flip. Another suplex gets another two on the champion but the referee gets taken down again.

 

Luger hits another powerslam but doesn’t cover for some reason. To be fair the guy never has been all that bright. He calls for the Rack but a JJ Dillon distraction lets Flair hit Luger in the leg with a chair to completely change momentum. Back in and Flair cannonballs down onto the leg as Luger is in BIG trouble. Flair kicks him in the knee and drops his own knee on Luger’s bad knee before putting on the Figure Four. Luger sits up and flexes his muscles before turning the hold over for a break. The leg is badly damaged though so Luger’s explosiveness is gone.

 

Flair goes up but Luger manages to slam him off the top on just one good leg. Luger no sells a right hand to the head and is all fired up again. There’s another gorilla press slam but the knee goes out as he turns Flair over. Flair sends him out to the floor again but Lex comes back in with a sunset flip for two. Luger flexes again but pounds Flair down in the corner on pure adrenaline. A clothesline gets two and there’s another powerslam. Luger calls for the Rack but after he gets Flair up, the knee gives out and Flair falls on top, throws his feet on the ropes for additional leverage, and retains the title.

 

Rating: A. This is an excellent match with an excellent story being told. Luger was such a natural athletic machine that he would never stop going on pure athleticism alone and eventually his body gave out on him, giving Flair the win. These two had great chemistry together and would always have good if not great matches together. Excellent main event here and well worthy of closing out the biggest show of the year.

 

The announcers talk about how great a match we just saw. As they’re talking, you can hear a battle royal being announced as a post PPV dark match.

 

Flair goes on a rant about how awesome he is and how the title is his.

 

The announcers talk about how great the company is.

 

A highlight package ends the show.

 

Overall Rating: B. This was one of the best Starrcades to date with arguably the best main event yet. There are seven matches on the card and only one of them is actually bad. The main event is excellent, the Midnights match is very good, there’s a great moment with the TV Title changing hands. The best sign of this show though is the rise of the young stars. Sting was in there with some major names, Luger had Flair beat, and Rick Steiner winning the title was a great moment that people genuinely cared about. Solid show here and worth checking out if you can find it.

 

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On This Day: December 13, 1989: This Here Is What We Call A (Bad) Concept Show

Starrcade 1989
Date: December 13, 1989
Location: The Omni, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jim Cornette, Terry Funk

 

As mentioned, this is the culmination of a banner year for WCW. The year 1989 might have had the best in ring action that the company ever saw with the younger guys rising up the card while the older guys were being phased out. That’s why this card was such a strange idea: there are twelve matches and only twelve guys wrestling on the show. Let’s get to it.

 

The opening video is a bunch of shots of everyone in the tournament with a computer theme. This show is called Future Shock for no apparent reason.

 

The announcers go over the scoring system.

 

The lighting is bad again after showing some improvement last year.

 

Doom vs. Steiner Brothers

 

Again, ALL matches are tournament matches so there’s no point in listing them as such. Apparently the Samoans are replacing the injured Skyscrapers. Doom has Woman and her bodyguard Nitron with them here. Nitron is actually Tyler Mane, who you might know as Sabretooth from the X-Men movies. The Steiners are the World Tag Champions. Scott starts with Doom #2 (Reed) as there are A LOT of empty seats opposite the cameras. Scott hits a quick powerslam for two but charges into a boot in the corner.

 

A hard clothesline puts Reed down as Ross is already mixing up which Doom member is which. Off to Rick vs. Simmons with Rick hitting a quick suplex but barking instead of covering. Back to Reed who snapmares Rick down and pounds away before getting caught in a slam for a quick two count. Back to Scott for a headlock and an atomic drop as the announcers actually have to acknowledge the fact that the seats are so empty.

 

Scott takes Reed down and cranks on his leg before bringing Rick back inside. That goes nowhere so here’s Scott again for a backbreaker for a near fall. Scott misses a big clothesline and crashes out to the floor to give Doom their first advantage. Nitron gets in some shots of his own as Scott is in big trouble. Back in for a powerslam by Simmons for two before Reed comes in for some shots to the ribs.

 

Scott is sent back to the floor for another mugging as Rick keeps trying to make the save, only allowing Nitron and Reed to double team Scott. A double backdrop puts Scott down and there’s a whip spinebuster by Simmons for two. Doom hits a double back elbow and Scott is sent back to the floor again. Simmons suplexes Scott back inside but Scott falls on top for two.

 

A belly to belly suplex puts Simmons down and there’s the hot tag to Rick. Rick pounds away and hits a big old powerslam for two and Reed is knocked over the top and out to the floor. A HARD right hand puts Simmons down but Reed is back in for the save. Nitron trips up Rick but gets clotheslined down for his efforts. Everyone brawls to the floor and Rick dives in to beat the count for the win.

 

Rating: C. Not bad here but it was a pretty standard power vs. power match. I’m guessing the ending had to happen that way for the sake of the scoring but it’s, yet again, a pretty lame way to open up Starrcade. Doom would actually go on to beat the Steiners for the world tag team titles soon after this and hold them longer than any team in the history of WCW.

 

Steiners – 15 points (2 matches remaining)

Road Warriors – 0 points (3 matches remaining)

Samoan Swat Team – 0 points (3 matches remaining)

Doom – 0 points (2 matches remaining)

 

We get to meet the four people in the singles tournament.

 

Sting vs. Lex Luger

 

Luger is US Champion and bails to the floor to start. He tries to leave up the ramp but Sting catches him with a beating in the aisle. Back in and Sting immediately pounds away before being sent to the apron, only to take Luger down with a clothesline. A slingshot splash gets two and Luger falls to the floor. The fans are NUTS for Sting at this point. Luger gets in a kick to the ribs but Sting blocks a ram into the barricade. A clothesline puts Luger down again and Sting breaks the count back inside.

 

They go to the ring one more time and Sting hits a top rope cross body for two. This is all Sting so far. Sting pounds away in the corner and clotheslines Luger down again for another near fall. Off to a wristlock and armbar on Luger followed by a middle rope cross body for two. Back to the arm as it’s still been all Sting so far. A dropkick gets two on Luger but Sting dives into an atomic drop to give Lex his first advantage. Another atomic drop puts Sting down as the announcer continues to screw up the time, saying we’re ten minutes into the match. It’s more like seven but that’s WCW for you.

 

A right hand to Sting’s ribs has him in trouble again and a kick to those ribs has him in even more trouble. Luger is setting up for the Torture Rack and sends Sting ribs first into the barricade for good measure. Back in and Luger hits a middle rope axhandle for two as he’s starting to crank it up. A powerslam plants Sting down but he backflips out of the Rack, only to get caught in the corner.

 

Lex pounds away in the corner but Sting is all fired up. He comes back with right hands of his own on Luger followed by a suplex for two. Luger bails to the floor, only to be rammed into the barricade for his efforts. They both literally fall over the top rope to get back in, but Luger lands on top and grabs the top rope for the evil pin to take the early lead.

 

Rating: C+. Much better and more exciting match here than the opener with the crowd being WAY into Sting. These two would go to war for years on end as they would be nearly eternally joined at the hip. The timing issues are already becoming annoying but as mentioned, that was something you would often see in wrestling.

 

Lex Luger – 20 points (2 matches remaining)

Great Muta – 0 points (3 matches remaining)

Ric Flair – 0 points (3 matches remaining)

Sting – 0 points (2 matches remaining)

 

Doom vs. Road Warriors

 

Animal and Reed start things off and it’s as slow and plodding as you would expect two guys of this size to be. After a dropkick to Reed’s chest it’s off to Hawk for a wristlock. They collide a few times in the middle of the ring with Hawk finally taking him down via a clothesline. Off to Simmons (keep in mind that they’re not named that but it’s obvious which is which if you’ve seen them wrestle enough) who collides with Hawk several times. Hawk takes over again and it’s off to Animal who gets taken down by an elbow to the face.

 

It’s back to Hawk almost immediately for a missed charge, sending his shoulder HARD into the post. Simmons catapults Hawk’s throat into the bottom rope and it’s back to Reed who gets two off a powerslam. We hit the chinlock for a bit until a double back elbow takes down Hawk.

 

A middle rope elbow gets two for Reed as Woman talks trash from the floor. Back to the chinlock on Hawk as the time speeds up again. I haven’t noticed any clipping here so I’m guessing they’re just speeding things up to get through the matches faster. Hawk fights back with right hands and gets the tag off to Animal. A powerslam puts Reed on the mat as everything breaks down. Simmons tries a piledriver but Hawk comes off the top rope with a clothesline to give Animal the pin.

 

Rating: D. Not much to see here as we’re already reaching the problem with a tournament like this: we’ve already seen Doom twice and we get to see them again later on. It’s not interesting to watch them fight at this point given that they’re pretty much already eliminated from a math standpoint. Also it’s a bad sign when you have to bring math into a wrestling show but maybe that’s just personal taste.

 

Road Warriors – 20 points (2 matches remaining)

Steiner Brothers – 15 points (2 matches remaining)

Samoan Swat Team – 0 points (3 matches remaining)

Doom – 0 points (1 match remaining)

 

Ric Flair vs. Great Muta

 

Muta is TV Champion and undefeated coming into this match. Flair is of course world champion and brings the Andersons with him. Muta has Gary Hart to counter, meaning advantage Horsemen, as usual. Muta speeds things WAY up to start as is his custom. He’s one of the most exciting guys you’ll ever see and he was at his best around this point.

 

Muta immediately pounds him down into the corner and hits his quick strike elbows on the mat. Flair comes back with chops and has the Figure Four on maybe 75 seconds in. Hart calls out Buzz Sawyer and Dragonmaster but they’re cut off by the Horsemen. Muta is out of the hold but his moonsault hits knees, allowing Flair to get a rollup for a pin in less than two minutes.

 

Ric Flair – 20 points (2 matches remaining)

Lex Luger – 20 points (2 matches remaining)

Sting – 0 points (2 matches remaining)

Great Muta – 0 points (2 matches remaining)

 

Steiner Brothers vs. Road Warriors

 

This is the ONLY meeting (that mattered) between two of the biggest tag teams of all time. Why it was wasted on a show like this in an inconsequential tag match is beyond me. These teams are friends at this point. Scott and Hawk get things going with Cornette considering this a battle of idiots. Ross says the fans are in awe as an excuse for them being bored so far. Both guys get big boots to the face in succession so it’s off to Rick for a chance at Hawk.

 

Hawk hits a BIG clothesline to take Rick down for two before Animal comes in for a double back elbow. Rick comes back with a Steiner Line to stagger Animal and we’re at a standoff. Animal tries a bearhug but gets caught in a belly to belly suplex for no cover. Back to Scott to meet Hawk with the bird enthusiast gorilla pressing him down to the mat with ease. Rick has to make the save this time and Hawk is annoyed at his actions. Animal comes back in and gets caught in a few belly to belly suplexes. This is pure power the entire way so far.

 

Animal comes out of the corner with a hard clothesline so Hawk comes in for an over the shoulder kneeling backbreaker. A release tilt-a-whirl slam gets two on Scott but he comes back with what was supposed to be a middle rope suplex. Instead it was more like Hawk fell flat on Scott’s chest and was driven face first into the mat. Back to Animal for a bearhug on Scott followed by a BIG powerslam from Hawk. Everything breaks down and Animal picks up Scott for a belly to back suplex with Hawk adding a top rope clothesline. Animal bridges Scott back but Scott raises his arm to get the pin as Animal’s shoulders were down.

 

Rating: D+. Most of that is for the star power alone. This was a lot of pounding on each other and a SCARY botch on that middle rope belly to belly superplex. The Steiners winning was probably the right move here as they shouldn’t have gotten pinned while still being the tag team champions. The Warriors should NOT be wrestling multiple matches in one night though as they already look spent.

 

Steiners – 35 points (1 match remaining)

Road Warriors – 20 points (1 match remaining)

Samoan Swat Team – 0 points (3 matches remaining)

Doom – 0 points (1 match remaining)

 

Sting vs. Great Muta

 

These two fought about a million times and it was Muta who took the TV Title from Sting. Sting dodges a quick spin kick but gets caught in a full nelson. He easily powers out of the hold and puts on one of his own. Muta takes it to the corner and rolls out of it before kicking Sting in the chest. A shot to the face has Sting in trouble as Funk wishes he could do the things Muta is doing. Muta hooks a headlock but Sting escapes again and flips Muta over before getting two off a suplex.

 

A quick attempt at the Scorpion Deathlock is escaped and Muta bails to the floor for a bit. This is a rather fast paced match which is different from what we’ve been seeing so far. Back in and Muta backdrops him down before hitting some of those quick strike elbows of his. Muta grabs both arms behind Sting’s back and flips forward, pulling them forward. Bryan Danielson (Daniel Bryan) would use this move in the indies and call it Cattle Mutilation.

 

Sting flips forward to escape and pounds away with AMERICAN right hands, because all foreigners are evil and must be destroyed by the powers of our American heroes. A big elbow drop gets two on Muta and it’s off to a chinlock. Back up and Muta takes him into the corner and out to the apron for only a few seconds. A backbreaker looks to set up the moonsault but Muta lands on his feet when Sting moves. Muta kicks Sting down and goes up, only to be crotched and superplexed down for the pin.

 

Rating: C. This wasn’t bad but again the time constraints are getting really annoying. These guys could easily have a twenty five or thirty minute match but they’re relegated to eight and a half minutes after already wrestling once tonight. It’s decent enough for the amount of time they had but these matches are begging for extra time.

 

Lex Luger – 20 points (2 matches remaining)

Ric Flair – 20 points (2 matches remaining)

Sting – 20 points (1 match remaining)

Great Muta – 0 points (1 match remaining)

 

Since we’re halfway done we take a breather and look at the scenarios and recap everything.

 

Samoan Swat Team vs. Doom

 

The Samoans are Fatu (more famous as Rikishi) and Samoan Savage (more famous as Tama of the Islanders) and they have Oliver Humperdink as the Big Kahuna in their corner. Before the match, the Samoans and Kahuna do their tribal ceremony or whatever you want to call it. Reed and Savage get things going and unfortunately it’s the Samoan and not Randy. They collide in the middle and we get SAMOAN YELLING.

 

They collide again with no one going anywhere so it’s Reed pounding away at the ample midsection instead. Savage comes back with some kicks to the ribs of his own and it’s off to Fatu. The match continues to go slowly but to be fair this is Doom’s third appearance tonight. Simmons comes in and it’s a brawl again as he pounds on Fatu. Back to Reed for more pounding on the back followed by something resembling a spinebuster. A double back elbow gets two on Fatu off a blind tag and Doom is looking good for the first time tonight.

 

Reed sends Savage out to the floor and Simmons rams him into the barricade. The Samoans are called both the New Wild Samoans and the Samoan Swat Team but the latter is the better known of the names. Simmons comes in off a tag and gets caught in a sunset flip for two. A bulldog is countered by Savage but Reed breaks up a tag attempt to Fatu. Simmons hits a middle rope right hand to the head for two followed by a sloppy body slam. Reed goes up top but misses a middle rope shoulder as everything breaks down. Fatu headbutts Reed down for two but after they collide again, Fatu falls on Reed for the pin.

 

Rating: D. This was terrible as it was clear that Doom was totally spent. As mentioned, they would move on soon after this and win the tag titles, albeit with a new manager. This was a BAD styles clash as the Samoans were trying to match power with Doom and power vs. power rarely works for the most part. This didn’t go that well and we get two more Samoan matches tonight.

 

Steiners – 35 points (1 match remaining)

Samoan Swat Team – 20 points (2 matches remaining)

Road Warriors – 20 points (1 match remaining)

Doom – 0 points (0 matches remaining)

 

Ric Flair vs. Lex Luger

 

Back at this point, champion vs. champion matches were very rare so this is a treat for the fans. Feeling out process to start with both guys seeming a bit tentative. You can’t think Flair is tired at this point after having about three minutes in the ring earlier. As is his custom, Flair can’t get much going in the early part of the match. The chops have little damage and Luger throws Ric around like he’s not even there. A hard clothesline puts Flair down and another puts him out on the floor.

 

Back in and Flair goes after the knee but Luger has too much experience against the Nature Boy to let him do that. Instead it’s an atomic drop for the world champion and some right hands for good measure. Flair is an American so those aren’t American right hands according to JR. Another attempt at the knee goes a bit better though and Luger is slowed down a bit.

 

The world champion stays on the leg and it’s so strange to hear the fans approve of him being on offense. Luger shoves him away and scores with another clothesline before posing like the arrogant jerk that he is at this point. The announcers keep pushing him as the champion of the future as he rams Flair’s head into the corner to put him back down.

 

Luger stomps away in the corner and poses some more followed by yet another clothesline. Some elbow drops get a near fall on Flair as we’re at five minutes left in the time limit. Flair comes back with another chop but Lex pounds him right back down. A big backdrop puts Flair down and Ric rolls out to the floor. Back in and Luger goes after the neck and back as we have four minutes left. Flair comes back with a suplex but he can’t follow up. Three minutes left now.

 

A backslide gets two for Flair and they slug it out until Flair is flipped over in the corner. He runs down the apron and goes up but jumps up into yet another clothesline. That gets two and Lex is very frustrated. A sunset flip gets two for Flair so Luger pounds him down with ease. Ric goes up top very slowly and gets slammed right back down like he’s nothing. Luger misses a jumping elbow and we have thirty seconds to go. Flair gets a belly to back suplex out of nowhere and throws on the Figure Four but the time limit runs out for a draw, giving each guy five points.

 

Rating: C+. The match was fine for the most part and the ending was the only thing they could do given the points structure and the fact that you don’t want either guy to go over the other at this point. It wasn’t bad for the most part but when you had these two going at it for thirty minutes last year, it was kind of hard to get into a match that only got half that much time. Not bad though.

 

Lex Luger – 25 points (1 match remaining)

Ric Flair – 25 points (1 match remaining)

Sting – 20 points (1 match remaining)

Great Muta – 0 points (1 match remaining)

 

Samoan Swat Team vs. Steiner Brothers

 

Rick and Fatu get things going and it’s time for more SAMOAN YELLING. Rick doesn’t take time to translate and punches Fatu in the face instead. The fans are WAY into the Steiners here. It’s off to Scott for the power of the team with a slam. The Savage comes in and walks into a slam as well as the Steiners take over. The Samoans run to the floor and we get the classic Steiners pose of Rick on all fours and Scott standing over him.

 

After a conference with the Big Kahuna (that’s so fun to say), it’s back to Savage vs. Scott. Since nothing else has worked, the Samoan goes with the ancient tribal custom of poking him in the eye to take over. A headbutt staggers Scott and it’s off to Fatu for more brawling. The basics of the Samoan offense is as follows: kick, scream, forearm to the back, scream, headbutt, scream. Just picture that combination for about five minutes and you have the majority of this match.

 

The Savage comes in again and sends Scott into the corner before clotheslining him down for another near fall. The fans are trying to get behind the Steiners but they’re so tired after a show this long and uninteresting. Scott gets choked in the corner by Fatu as the Kahuna distracts the referee. A double headbutt puts Scott down for two but Rick comes in and bites the Savage. It doesn’t seem to have much of an effect as Scott is knocked out to the floor.

 

Back in and Scott’s sunset flip attempt is broken up before Fatu puts him in a bearhug. We’re under four minutes now as Scott is beginning to fade. The hold takes Scott down to the mat so Rick comes in to break it up, only to cause Scott to be double teamed. Back to the bearhug as the match continues to waste time until we can have extra drama.

 

A powerslam gets two on Scott with two minutes left. Scott grabs the Frankensteiner out of absolutely nowhere but Fatu tags out before Scott can bring in Rick. Savage misses a splash and there’s the tag, even though the referee didn’t see it. Rick cleans house but Scott throws Fatu over the top rope which is a DQ in WCW.

 

Rating: D+. Very basic tag match here and nothing all that special. At the end of the day, the Samoans are little more than a gimmick tag team and not much more. The Steiners were still new as a tag team so they weren’t able to carry a team like Fatu and Savage, especially in their fourth match of the night.

 

Steiners – 35 points (0 matches remaining)

Samoan Swat Team – 30 points (1 match remaining)

Road Warriors – 20 points (1 match remaining)

Doom – 0 points (0 matches remaining)

 

Great Muta vs. Lex Luger

 

Luger comes to the ring very gingerly because of the leg work from earlier by Flair. Lex is very tentative to start as Muta tries some sweeping kicks to the leg. A clothesline finally staggers Muta a bit but Luger can’t hit it will all of the force that he usually has behind one of them. Some right hands stagger Muta as the fans aren’t sure who to cheer for in this one. The paint is almost entirely off of Muta’s face by this point.

 

Muta finally connects with a kick to Luger’s leg and the entire match changes almost instantly. Luger limps around the ring and Muta fires off kick after kick. An Irish whip sends Luger limping into the corner for Muta’s handspring elbow. Off to a leg lock on the mat by Muta until Lex finally rakes the eyes to escape. Muta goes right back to the leg and both guys are down again. A quick half crab has Luger in even more trouble but Muta turns it into an inverted Indian deathlock with a chinlock to crank on the leg even more.

 

Muta stays on the leg as we continue in the same cycle of this match. We only have four minutes left which should be almost twice that long. A superkick puts Luger down and a dropkick does the same. Luger comes back with a hard clothesline to put Muta down and they slug it out with two minutes to go. A bad looking hiptoss puts Muta down and Lex throws him to the outside. Back in and a sunset flip gets two for Muta but he walks into a powerslam with a minute to go. Luger loads up the Rack but Muta sprays hit green mist in Luger’s face (with Luger looking like he was hit by a bus) for the lame DQ.

 

Rating: C. This is a match that could have been excellent if it had another ten minutes and a good finish. The problem here is that they had to do the stupid finish here or the ending to the tournament would have far less drama to it. Muta was far better than he was allowed to be here, but he would lose the TV Title in a few weeks to Arn Anderson.

 

Lex Luger – 35 points (0 matches remaining)

Ric Flair – 25 points (1 match remaining)

Sting – 20 points (1 match remaining)

Great Muta – 0 points (0 matches remaining)

 

Road Warriors vs. Samoan Swat Team

 

If the Samoans win at all they win the tournament, if the Warriors win by pin or submission they win the tournament, and if the Warriors win by DQ, the Steiners win. I have no idea what happens in the case of two teams tying so we’ll assume that isn’t going to happen. Animal and Fatu start things off with Fatu not being able to piledrive him down. Hawk comes in to chop it out with the Savage but it’s clear that neither team has anything left.

 

Savage tries what was supposed to be a suplex but basically drops Hawk on his head. A clothesline gets two for Hawk and it’s back to Animal. Fatu gets slammed down and Animal starts beating on him all over again. Savage comes in with a superkick to take Animal down as the boredom continues here. We hit a chinlock for a bit but the Savage misses a middle rope splash. Off to Hawk and everything breaks down. Savage goes up and gets crotched, allowing Hawk to hit his top rope clothesline on Fatu for the pin and the tournament.

 

Rating: D. I have to give them a break here as they were totally spent at this point. You can’t ask a team like the Warriors to go for twenty minutes in three shifts on the same night. It wasn’t a good match for the most part, but again it’s hard to criticize them given how much they had done already tonight.

 

Road Warriors – 40 points

Steiners – 35 points

Samoan Swat Team – 30 points

Doom – 0 points

 

The Steiners come out to celebrate with the Warriors for their tournament win.

 

Sting vs. Ric Flair

 

Sting has to win by pin or submission, Flair can win by pinfall, submission or countout. Any other combination results in either a tie or Luger winning. Sting grabs a headlock to start and hiptosses him down. Flair bails to the floor to run off some of the clock. Back in and we get some chain wrestling, resulting with Sting in control on the mat. They get up again and Flair places Sting on the top rope to play some mind games.

 

Flair puts on a top wristlock but Sting overpowers him to take Flair to the mat. Very technical match so far. They run the ropes a few times with Sting dropping down a few times before hitting a gorilla press slam. Flair bails to the outside again as Sting is all fired up. Back in and Sting blocks a hiptoss into a backslide as we hit five minutes in. Flair hits a HARD chop and Sting is in trouble in a hurry.

 

A quick shoulder block puts Flair down for two and Sting is starting to worry about the clock. We head to the floor with Sting being sent ribs first into the barricade as the world champion takes over. Flair suplexes him back inside for two and there’s the knee drop for good measure. Ric gets a few near falls off some rollups and a double underhook suplex for the same. They head to the floor again and Flair’s chops wake Sting up again.

 

We have five minutes left and Sting comes back in with a sunset flip but Flair punches him in the head to break it up. Sting hits a quick suplex of his own for two and it’s time to get fired up again. He pounds away on Flair in the corner and there’s the Stinger’s Splash. The Scorpion Deathlock goes on but Flair is immediately in the ropes.

 

Off to the Figure Four on Sting but he makes the ropes very quickly. Flair goes back to the knee with two minutes to go. A knee onto the leg has Sting in trouble as Flair is pacing himself. Sting grabs a backslide for two and we have a minute to go. Flair crushes the leg again and cannonballs down onto it for good measure. Now it’s time for the Figure Four but Sting rolls Flair up for the pin and the tournament title.

 

Rating: B+. By far and away the best match of the night here as you would expect from these two anytime they work together. This match was designed to set up some future stuff and Flair working as the heel here (mostly) was foreshadowing for those events. At least they let the fans have something good to go out on.

 

Sting – 40 points

Lex Luger – 35 points

Ric Flair – 25 points

Great Muta – 0 points

 

The Horsemen come out and after teasing beating Sting down for pinning Flair, they all congratulate him.

 

The Road Warriors say they’re awesome and Hawk talks about coming out to Iron Man by Black Sabbath and how appropriate it is.

 

Flair praises Sting to end the show. Literally the credits are rolling as Flair is still talking.

 

Overall Rating: D. This is still one of the dumbest ideas I’ve ever heard of in wrestling. At the end of the day, nothing was accomplished here and the fans were bored out of their minds by the end. There were only twelve wrestlers on the entire show (side note: The two African Americans and the Japanese man were all shut out. WCW had a history of racial discrimination complaints so this wasn’t a good idea) and the guys were all tired by the end of the night.

 

The fact that only one of the twelve matches was more than just ok and it’s really hard to care about this show at all. This show felt like it was a television Christmas special instead of the biggest show of the year. As I mentioned earlier, these concept shows would continue for years, but it would never be this bad again. Well, arguably almost never I guess but we’ll get to that in two years.

 

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Superstars on the Superstation: The Original Clash of the Champions

Superstars on the Superstation
Date: February 7, 1986
Location: The Omni, Atlanta, Georiga
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: David Crockett, Tony Schiavone

This is a rare show that I’ve heard about for years. Basically it’s a fan selected card with four matches featuring top stars. You could think of this as the prototype for Clash of the Champions actually. We’re just past Starrcade 1985 and Flair is still world champion due to a Dusty Finish in the main event of the biggest show of the year. This is from the glory days of the NWA so the show should be good. Let’s get to it.

We open with a shot of Magnum TA riding his motorcycle, set to a Willie Nelson song.

Magnum and some chick named Linda Curry are hosting tonight.

The announcers run down the card the fans have picked. All matches have 20 minute time limits, other than the world title match which is TV time remaining.

The Rock N Roll Express is getting ready. I’m sure some teenybopper would agree to lace up Morton’s boots for him while he does coke.

We get a clip of the Rock N Roll Express winning the world tag team titles from the Russians in July of 1985. They lost them a few months later, only to regain the belts at Starrcade.

World Tag Team Titles: Rock N Roll Express vs. Midnight Express

If this is anything lower than a B+, it’s a failure for these guys. These teams completely revolutionized tag team wrestling and basically invented the tag team formula you see in every major tag match. This is the less famous version of the Midnights with Bobby Eaton and Dennis Condrey as the challengers. It’s a brawl to start with the Midnights taking over on Gibson but Morton comes back in to take everything to the floor. The fans are NUTS for the Rock N Roll here.

Back in and the champions quickly clean house, sending the Midnights out for a consultation with Jim Cornette. We finally start with Gibson vs. Eaton as things slow down a bit. Gibson blocks a hiptoss and throws Eaton down before hitting a sweet flying headscissors. Off to Morton who punches both Midnights down and works on Bobby’s leg. They head back to the floor with Morton backdropping Eaton onto the concrete before pounding him against the barricade.

Back in and it’s a double tag off to Gibson vs. Condrey. The Rock N Roll takes over on Dennis’ leg with some slingshot splashes and elbows onto the knee for two. Gibson cranks on the leg before Morton comes in, decks Eaton, and cranks on Condrey’s leg as well. Condrey fights up and hits a knee to Ricky’s ribs but hurts his own leg so bad that he hits the mat. I miss selling like that in today’s product.

The champions take turns working on the leg with Ricky coming in off the top with a knee drop on Condrey’s leg. Dennis finally gets over to Eaton without too much resistance and we’re back to even for a bit. Eaton takes him into the corner for some HARD right hands, only to be taken down by a suplex. Back to Gibson whose dropkick is caught in a catapult, sending him face first into a forearm from Condrey. Dennis comes back in as we take a break.

Back with Eaton holding Gibson in a chinlock before it’s off to Condrey for the same hold. Morton gets drawn into the ring, allowing Eaton to drop a top rope knee to Gibson before Condrey puts on the chinlock again. Gibson finally fights up with a knee lift but Condrey rakes the eyes to stop a tag. Back to Eaton who gets two off a neckbreaker and puts on another chinlock.

Robert fights up and gets a quick two off a sunset flip but Condrey punches him back down. The Midnights miss the Rocket Launcher and there’s the hot tag off to Ricky. Everything breaks down and the double dropkick (Rock N Roll’s finisher) hits Eaton but it takes the referee out as well. Cornette brings in the tennis racket and Condrey BLASTS Morton in the back of the head, giving Eaton the pin and the titles. Keep in mind that this is 1986 when titles NEVER changed hands on TV.

Rating: B+. Yeah it’s still awesome. These guys just know how to work together and the crowd was way into this. The matches would get even better when Stan Lane replaced Condrey which says a lot given how good these guys looked here. Solid match here, which is all you would have expected coming in.

Gibson hits Eaton in the back with the racket for revenge.

The hosts chat about the match a bit.

Buy the Starrcade 1985 video for just FORTY FIVE BUCKS and allow six weeks for delivery. It’s a great show but that’s a WWE PPV today.

Cornette says he told us all so. Eaton, as awesome as he is, sells the racket shot by rolling on the floor in pain as Cornette thanks his Mama.

We look at the Russians beating down Animal from a few months ago. No idea where Hawk is during this attack.

Both Hawk and Animal were beaten down by the Russians a few weeks later. Remember that there were three Russians to two Road Warriors.

Road Warriors vs. Ivan Koloff/Nikita Koloff

The third Russian is Krusher Khrushchev, more famous as Smash from Demolition/Repo Man. Animal starts with Nikita and it’s the Russian diving off the middle rope, only to be caught in a bearhug. That’s scary power. Animal misses a legdrop but pops back up for a staredown. Off to Hawk for some tieups that go nowhere. All four guys are major powerhouses here so don’t expect much besides brawling.

Ivan comes in and avoids a charge but jumps into a punch to the ribs. A shoulder breaker and big boot drop Ivan before it’s back to Animal for a gorilla press. Animal drops an elbow for two as Baron Von Raschke is at ringside and apparently is a replacement for an injured Krusher. Back to Hawk who gets caught in the Russian corner for some evil Commie double teaming. Hawk comes back with a running clothesline and everything breaks down, including Baron coming in to lay out Hawk but it only gets two. Nikita trips Hawk up and Baron comes in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. The styles didn’t mix here but the fans were WAY into this feud as it was tugging at the heart strings of America which is a tried and true way to fire up the fans. Baron was far past his prime here but at least he was another foreigner that could play Krusher’s role very easily. Not a good match but the fans liked it which is what matters.

The Warriors’ manager Paul Ellering gets triple teamed but the Koloffs miss a clothesline with the chain. Hawk gets the chain and the Warriors/Ellering clean house.

Some NASCAR driver is here.

Some very southern fans say who they like and why they watch wrestling. Amazingly enough they love the Rock N Roll Express and want to see Flair get destroyed.

Now here’s a country song while we look at fans.

Magnum talks about how awesome his week in Tuscon, Arizona with Dusty on the set of a movie Dusty has a walk-on roll in. We get an interview with Dusty and country music legend Willie Nelson who is making the remake of John Wayne’s Stagecoach. It’s a TV movie if you’re wondering why you’ve never heard of it. Dusty tells a story about being a Nelson fan for years. Apparently Dusty shows up at Willie’s New Year’s show every year and nearly takes over the show. Shocking indeed. This goes on for nearly five minutes because we stopped being a wrestling show a long time ago.

We still have some of those $45 Starrcade tapes! You know, the one cut down by about an hour or two.

National Title: Dusty Rhodes vs. Tully Blanchard

Dusty is defending. The National Title was the main title from Georgia Championship Wrestling but it’s a midcard title here. Rhodes has a bad ankle coming in and we take a break less than a minute into the match. Back with Tully bailing into the corner as Dusty’s manager (Tully’s former manager) Baby Doll glares at Blanchard. Dusty takes him down and drops an elbow on the leg before slowly cranking on it for a bit. There’s another elbow on the leg and it’s time for Dusty to lay on the leg for a breather.

There’s the really bad Figure Four but Tully makes the rope. Tully bails to the floor for a bit but comes back in so Dusty can work on the leg a bit more. By work I mean lay down on but that’s Dusty in 1986 for you. The fans chant BREAK IT because they hate the Horsemen so much. Dusty’s matches sucked but the fans got into him vs. the Horsemen. Rhodes goes up for a shot to the head but hurts his bad leg on the way down.

You know Tully Blanchard is going after an injury like that and the leg work begins. We hit the ten minute (out of twenty) mark and Tully kicks the leg out again, making Dusty jump into the air for no apparent reason. There’s a much better Figure Four from Blanchard but Dusty just lays on the mat. Dusty turns it over but JJ Dillon pulls Tully to safety. Back up and Rhodes is of course fine enough to catch a cross body and hit a backbreaker.

A belly to belly takes Tully down but JJ has the referee. Tully realizes that Dusty isn’t going to sell the stupid leg so he knees Dusty in the back, sending him to the floor. Five minutes left now and Rhodes pounds away before suplexing Tully back in for two. Rhodes goes after JJ but Tully gets in a shot from behind to take over. A knee drop gets two for Blanchard and some left hands drop Dusty in the corner.

Dusty backslides him down (complete with crawling over to the ropes) for two as Crockett is almost giddy that time is running out on Tully. A clothesline puts Tully down again as we go from four minutes left to two minutes left in about 45 seconds. JJ trips up Dusty for two as we hit a minute left. Back in and Rhodes puts on a Boston Crab until the time runs out.

Rating: D-. Tully Blanchard is one of the best wrestlers you’ll ever find but there’s only so much he can do when Dusty won’t sell the freaking leg. It’s as basic of a story as you can tell in a wrestling match but when Dusty wants to just walk around and act like the injury he had coming into the match which was made worse during the match doesn’t exist, there isn’t much that can be done. Horrible match but it’s hard to blame Blanchard here.

Tully piledrives Dusty post match and takes the belt with him. He would win it in about a month anyway.

Magnum and Jim Crockett Jr. talk about some stuff that happened in 1985. The Jim Crockett Memorial Tag Team Cup is announced so we hear the sales pitch from the New Orleans Superdome to host the event. This isn’t gimmicked or anything and is as boring as it sounds.

Future Baseball Hall of Famer Gaylord Perry doesn’t have much to say.

NWA World Title: Ric Flair vs. Ron Garvin

Garvin was a bigger deal here than he’s remembered as and he’s challenging here. They chop it out in the corner to start and Garvin takes him down with a shoulder block. Flair bails out to the floor but gets caught in a headlock as soon as he’s back inside. Some right hands (not the Hands of Stone finisher) stagger Flair and a headbutt gives us the Flair Flop. Ric begs off in the corner so Garvin chops away. Ronnie rips at Flair’s nose and fires off more chops before backdropping Flair down.

The champion is sent out to the floor for another breather, only to be chopped even more upon reentry. Garvin goes after the arm for a change but the champion comes back with chops of his own to take over. Ronnie comes back with even more chops and a big right hand to send Flair to the floor. Flair gets caught in a sleeper but suplexes his way out and it’s time to go to school.

A suplex gets two for Flair and there’s the knee drop for the same. Ronnie chokes Flair from the mat and pounds away even more, leading to a chop off. Flair is sent into the corner for a flip but he stays inside instead of going to the apron. Garvin suplexes him down for two but Flair grabs a headlock to set up the bridge up into a backslide spot. A cross body gets two on the champion and there’s the real Flair Flip followed by Flair jumping into a right hand.

Garvin gets two from a small package but Flair chops him down. Ric yells at the referee as Garvin rolls Flair up, knocking the referee to the floor as a result. The Hands of Stone put Flair down but there’s no referee. Flair hits a quick knee to the back and pulls Ronnie’s foot off the rope as the referee counts the pin.

Rating: C. This was different than the usual Flair formula and it didn’t work all that well. Flair was only on offense for a few minutes here and there wasn’t much of a story to the match at all. Garvin continues to be a guy that I don’t get at all as I’ve yet to see anything of note from him in the ring.

Overall Rating: C. Eh it’s a free show so it’s kind of hard to complain for the most part. When you have a four match card and with one awesome match, one horrible match and two middle of the road matches, there isn’t another way to go besides in the middle. It’s always interesting to see how serious this company was when you compare it to the WWF which was setting up Hogan vs. Bundy at this point. Not a bad show but it’s really just an historical curiosity more than anything else.

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