Summerslam 2002
Date: August 25, 2002
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial, Uniondale, New York
Attendance: 14,797
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Jim Ross

The main story coming into this show would be the Brand Split but that’s not really an issue here as the main four PPVs weren’t brand exclusive. As for the show itself it’s another double main event with Rock defending his WWE (yeah E) Title against a beast named Brock Lesnar and the returning Shawn Michaels fighting his best friend HHH in a street fight. This is considered one of the best shows of all time so hopefully it holds up. Let’s get to it.

There’s no opening video this year for some reason.

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey beat Angle in a tag match and has been an annoyance for him lately. This is right after Mysterio debuted as part of probably the best year for new talent in company history. In 2002 WWE got Mysterio, Brock Lesnar, Batista, Randy Orton and a guy named Cena. This is when Rey’s knees weren’t held together by glue so it should be awesome. Rey comes in from behind and takes Angle down with a quick springboard dropkick but he has to go to the ropes to escape the ankle lock. An early 619 attempt misses and Angle pulls him to the floor. Very fast start.

Angle kicks at the leg as they come back in. An uppercut staggers Rey and a wheelbarrow suplex puts him down. Rey grabs the rope to avoid a German and gets a quick two off a rollup. Kurt gets two off a backbreaker and bends Rey’s back around the ropes. The fans are all over Angle but he shrugs off some forearms and catches a headscissors into a side slam for two.

Off to a wicked half crab on Rey but he somehow sneaks out and gets two off a rollup. Kurt takes his head off with a clothesline, only to get caught in a jawbreaker. Rey tries to speed things up but walks into the overhead belly to belly. There go the straps but Rey armdrags out of the Angle Slam and sends Angle to the floor. Rey loads up a dive but the referee stops him, drawing the most heat of the night. Mysterio will have none of that and dives OVER THE REFEREE to take Angle out.

Back in and a springboard legdrop gets two as the crowd is on fire. Rey tries a victory roll but gets caught in the ankle lock. Mysterio rolls out and send Angle to the ropes for the 619. The West Coast Pop gets a VERY close two and a spinwheel kick puts Angle down again. Mysterio goes up top but Angle runs the ropes for the suplex, only to have Rey flip over him but he tweaks the ankle on the landing. He’s fine enough to pop back up and dropkick Angle on the corner though and he loads up a hurricanrana. Angle falls forward on it though and the ankle lock is good for the submission.

Rating: A-. EXCELLENT opener here with Mysterio showing he could hang with anyone in the company. He really was amazing to watch when he wasn’t banged up and bloated like he is today and this might be his best match ever. This was a great choice for an opener and both guys looked amazing.

Eric Bischoff (Raw) and Stephanie McMahon (Smackdown) agree to share the GM’s office tonight.

Chris Jericho vs. Ric Flair

Flair is a legend, Jericho is a young punk. This led to Jericho running down Flair over and over again so Flair destroyed a bunch of Jericho’s band Fozzy’s equipment as they were performing on Raw. Jericho takes him into the corner so Flair slaps him in the face. Feeling out process to start as Flair looks to be in a dancing mood tonight. A backdrop puts Flair down and a belly to back suplex does the same.

Back up and Flair hits some LOUD chops to take over. They head to the corner and it’s Jericho firing off some chops of his own to set up a Flair Flip in the corner. A clothesline puts Flair on the floor and Jericho hits an elbow off the top to crush him against the barricade. Back in and Jericho fires off punches before doing a little dance. The Canadian gets two off a middle rope missile dropkick and chokes Flair with some tape. Flair fires off some chops but gets dropped by a single right hand.

Jericho goes up top but Flair pulls a page out of every opponent he’s ever had to slam him down. Chris misses a charge into the corner and Flair backdrops him down. NOW we go to school but Jericho escapes a suplex and tries the Walls. Flair rolls out but Jericho hits an enziguri to put Naitch down again.

The Lionsault misses and Flair goes back to the chops to take over. Flair tries a half crab but Jericho escapes and puts Flair in the Figure Four. Ric makes the rope but taps out anyway, which isn’t a submission apparently. There’s a rule clarification if you ever need one. The referee goes to tell the timekeeper that the match is still going, allowing Flair to hit a low blow and put on the Figure Four for the submission. Don’t bother setting up the move or anything Ric.

Rating: C. I’m sorry for not having much of note to say but it’s almost impossible to add stuff to good matches. Nice match here as Flair gets to be the dirtiest player in the game again but it wasn’t anything spectacular. Jericho was still awesome as a heel and it felt good to see Flair make a comeback and beat him in the middle of the ring. This was at a point when Flair could still look decent in a pair of trunks so it wasn’t an embarrassment at all.

Heyman gives Brock a pep talk for the main event tonight. Brock is in Rock’s head and the next big thing arrives tonight. This is when Brock was the unstoppable monster instead of being HHH cannon fodder for a year. I still can’t get over that it lasted that long.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Edge

Edge is still finding his footing as a singles guy and the potential is through the roof, so the solution is the same as it was with DDP back in 97: put him with really talented people who can make him look awesome. This resulted in Edge vs. Regal, Angle and Guerrero for about six months, making everyone love Edge like few thought possible. Apparently Eddie is jealous of Edge’s popularity and his status as a sex symbol. Cole’s words, not mine.

Technical stuff to start until Edge suplexes Eddie to the apron but gets his neck snapped across the top rope. Edge comes back with a hot shot and a standing powerslam for two before tying Eddie up in the ropes. There’s the spear to Eddie’s ribs but Eddie avoids the second attempt to send the Canadian to the floor. Edge is holding his shoulder (the spear arm) and Eddie has something to focus on. The bad shoulder goes into the steps and Edge is in trouble.

Back in and Eddie DDTs the arm before driving some elbows into the shoulder. A jumping DDT to the arm off the top gets two and it’s off to a keylock. Edge finally gets to a rope so Eddie stomps even harder on the shoulder. Now it’s a cross face chickenwing of all moves shifted into a Fujiwara Armbar. Back up and Eddie belly to back suplexes him down but stays on the arm with a top wristlock. Edge finally slams him down to get a breather and fires off some clotheslines.

The half nelson faceplant gets two and Edge suplexes Eddie to the floor. A cross body off the top to the floor puts Guerrero down but Edge injures the shoulder again. Back in and Edge goes up but has to counter a superplex into a front superplex for two on Eddie. Edge loads up the spear but Eddie dropkicks him in the shoulder to put him down.

The frog splash hits knees and there’s the Edgecution for two. Another Edgecution is countered into a northern lights and Eddie hits the frog splash onto the bad shoulder for two. Some IDIOTS are chanting boring at this. Eddie goes up again but gets slammed down allowing Edge to hit the spear (with the bad shoulder with no problem) for the pin.

Rating: B-. This was chugging right along until the STUPID ending. You cannot have Eddie working over on the arm for ten minutes and then hit the finisher like it’s nothing. What’s the point in even working on the arm if that’s how you end the match? It was going fine until that point but the ending just stopped it cold, much like the spear should have done for Edge.

The Un-Americans are ready to beat Booker T and Goldust to prove that America sucks. The only bad part though is they have to do it here in Long Island. This is a classic gimmick and would work at almost any point in history.

Raw Tag Titles: Goldust/Booker T vs. Un-Americans

The Un-Americans are Lance Storm and Christian (with Test) and they have the gold coming in. Goldust and Christian start with the Canadian being run over and uppercutted down for two. Off to Storm who gets caught in an atomic drop and it’s Booker T in to fire off right hands. Booker drops a big knee for two and brings in Goldust, only to have Storm poke him in the eye to take over.

The fans chant USA like the true xenophobes they are. We get some classic heel cheating as the Canadians double team until Christian gets two off a backbreaker. Back to Storm who walks into a kind of Boss Man Slam but Christian distracts the referee so the hot tag doesn’t count. The beating continues but Goldust catapults Christian into Storm to buy himself some time.

Goldust slaps the mat to try to fire up the crowd but Storm takes out Booker again so there’s no one for Goldie to tag. The champions miss a Conchairto and NOW the hot tag goes through. Booker cleans house and lays in the chops to Christian. A missile dropkick gets two but Booker accidentally superkicks the referee. Booker hits a double ax kick to take out both champions and there’s the Spinarooni. Christian is kicked down but here’s Test with a big boot to lay out Booker, giving Christian the pin.

Rating: D+. This was a BIG step down from what we’ve had so far tonight. The match was just dull and nothing we haven’t seen done better a hundred times. Booker and Goldust had chemistry and fan support so we had to wait four months for them to get the titles. The Un-Americans were a find midcard heel act but the titles should have changed here.

Nidia is at The World (WWF New York) and makes out with a fan for some reason.

Bischoff and Stephanie continue their stupid back and forth.

Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit is defending and a Smackdown guy in this brand vs. brand match. Van Dam hits some quick kicks to send Benoit to the outside but Benoit takes him down back inside. Van Dam spins away from a kick in the corner and hits a spinning cross body out of the corner for two. Benoit ducks another kick and hits a great release German suplex to take over. An elbow to the face gets two more for Benoit and it’s time to work on the back.

Benoit gets another near fall off a backbreaker and a snap suplex gets the same. Off to an armbar as Benoit wants the shoulder now. Rob gets some quick twos off rollups but Benoit runs him over with another elbow to the face. Benoit runs into a boot in the corner but the split legged moonsault hits knees. The Swan Dive misses but Benoit rolls away from the Five Star as well.

Now the Crossface goes on for a good while but Van Dam makes the ropes. The challenger goes up but Benoit shoves him off the top and shoulder first into the barricade. Back in and Benoit hits a shoulder breaker (see that people? It’s called psychology. LEARN IT!) for two as the fans are distracted by something. Benoit wisely puts on a rest hold until their attention is back again.

They trade cross arm chokes with Benoit taking over again. Van Dam kicks his leg out but misses Rolling Thunder, allowing Benoit to put on the Crossface again. Rob elbows out but gets rolled up for two. Benoit goes back to the arm and sends him shoulder first into the post. A northern lights suplex onto the arm has Van Dam….looking confused and two more don’t really change that.

Back to the Crossface and Van Dam looks more annoyed than anything else. Rob (with his hair down for maybe the only time I ever remember) makes the rope and puts a Crossface on Benoit for a few seconds. A jumping kick to the face puts Benoit down for two and now Rolling Thunder connects.

Van Dam hits a shoulder to the ribs but injures the shoulder again (thanks for selling Rob). Not that it matters though as he kicks Benoit in the face for two. Rob gets crotched on the top but counters a belly to back superplex into a cross body to put both guys down. Van Dam pops up and hits the Five Star for the pin and the title. Extra points for Rob doing the finger point from the mat when he’s announced as the new champion.

Rating: B. This bad shoulder selling is getting on my nerves. Benoit had RVD in one of the best submissions ever three different times and Van Dam looked like he had a five year old child on his leg. The rest of the match however was very solid with Rob hanging in there with Benoit who was his usual awesome self.

Stephanie, having just lost the IC Title to Raw (giving them all the belts I believe) laughs. This story continued to not make sense until they just gave up.

Video on the Un-Americans who hate American. Undertaker wasn’t going to stand for this and turned face to deal with them. Well among other reasons but this was his first major feud as a face.

Undertaker vs. Test

Feeling out process to start with Taker sending Test into the corner and cranking on the arm. A big clothesline takes Test down for two but he shoves the referee into the ropes to break up Old School. Test sends him into the steps and into the turnbuckle to keep Taker in trouble. A running clothesline in the corner staggers Taker and it’s off to an armbar. Taker suplexes out but misses an elbow drop as this continues to drag.

Test misses an elbow as well and now Old School connects. Snake Eyes connects but Test ducks the big boot. Taker shoves him off and hits the chokeslam for two. Christian and Storm come in as a distraction but take a chokeslam each, allowing Test to hit his big boot for two. Test tries a chair shot but hits the ropes, sending it back into his own face. The Tombstone finishes this.

Rating: D. This wasn’t horrible but come on. It’s Undertaker vs. Test at the second biggest show of the year with Test being as an Un-American. Did you really expect ANY other result here? The match was passable enough but it’s definitely the lame match on the show. To be fair though it’s not even nine minutes long and it’s not a disaster.

Now let’s get to the real reason this show rocks.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. HHH. They were best friends back in the late 90s but Shawn broke his back and had to retire. Over the next four years, HHH rose to the top of the company and a higher level than Shawn ever achieved. Shawn came back to Raw and offered to reform DX, but HHH laid him out, saying they were never friends and he just used Shawn.

Then someone rammed Shawn through a windshield and HHH vowed to find out who it was. Shawn found security video revealing it was HHH, who said he did it to prove Shawn is vulnerable. Shawn’s doctors said he’d make a full recovery. Say by, Summerslam? The match isn’t sanctioned and is a street fight because it couldn’t be anything else. This is a great example of a feud based on hatred instead of some convoluted idea and it made the match much better.

Shawn Michaels vs. HHH

Shawn is in jeans tonight to hide the knee braces. Michaels comes out with right hands but HHH sends him to the outside. Not that it matters as Shawn is right back inside with more right hands. HHH is tossed to the floor and Shawn hits a nice dive to take him out. Remember that this is Shawn’s first match since March of 1998, or four and a half years ago.

A clothesline puts HHH down again and it’s garbage can time. HHH gets in a shot to the ribs and drops Shawn face first onto the barricade to get a breather. Shawn comes back in and is tossed over the top again but he skins the cat to a big pop. A trashcan shot caves in HHH’s head and a top rope fist to the head puts him down again. Shawn tunes up the band but HHH counters into a backbreaker to get to the meat of the match.

Another backbreaker has Shawn in agony and flopping like a fish as only he can. HHH gives a crotch chop and kicks Shawn down with ease. It’s chair time but a shot to the back only gets two. Shawn escapes a suplex into an O’Connor Roll for two but walks into a facebuster. A DDT onto the chair is only good for two but Shawn is busted open. HHH takes off Shawn’s belt and whips him in the back as the screaming continues.

And now it’s sledgehammer time. Shawn gets in some shots to the ribs to escape and HHH drops the hammer. The fans are behind HBK but he gets whipped into the corner and it’s off to the abdominal stretch. HHH gets caught holding the ropes and Hebner physically breaks the hold before yelling HHH into the corner. They slug it out again and HHH loads up a superplex but Shawn shoves him off, only to get crotched. HHH blasts Shawn’s wide open back with the chair and the crowd is somber.

A backbreaker onto the chair has Shawn lying motionless but HHH only gets two. He covers a few more times and HHH is very frustrated. A side slam onto the chair gets another two as JR screams for a fast count. Shawn counters a Pedigree onto the chair with a low blow and both guys are down. The HBK chant starts up again and HHH has the chair superkicked into his face. Now HHH is busted open too and Shawn slugs away before hitting the forearm and the nipup to blow the roof off the place.

Shawn backdrops him down and cracks HHH in the head with the chair. HHH is whipped over the corner and out to the floor where Shawn gets to beat on him with the belt. Shawn knocks him onto the announce table and hits him in the head with Hugo Savinovich’s shoe (Lawler: “A heel for a heel!”). HHH is sent into the steps and here’s a ladder being slammed into HHH’s face.

Some shots to the ribs have HHH screaming and the ladder is placed against the post with HHH being catapulted face first into the steel. That’s only good for two so Shawn heads outside again to get the ladder. HHH baseball slides the ladder into Michaels and pounds away at the cut head. For some reason HHH tries to come in off the top and gets caught in a superplex for two.

The crowd is losing their minds off these kickouts. A sunset flip gets two for Shawn but he gets caught by the knee to the face for two. HHH brings in the steps but Shawn drop toeholds him face first into the steel. A clothesline puts HHH on the floor and Shawn puls out a table. Well why not since we’ve used everything else.

Shawn puts him on the table and splashes him from the top rope in the big spot of the match. Both guys are DONE and the fans are in awe. Shawn sends the ladder back inside, says he loves us all, and drops the elbow from the top. Michaels has that look in his eye and tunes up the band but HHH catches the kick coming in. He loads up the Pedigree but Shawn sweeps the legs and rolls HHH up for the pin to blow the roof off the place again.

Rating: A+. Anyone who has read my stuff over the years knows I do not like a lot of things about HHH. For tonight, forget all that because this is one of the best matches of all time. I’ve seen this match several times and it still had me smiling to see Shawn make comeback after comeback and give HHH every single thing he deserved. It goes to show how great Shawn is as he came in after being gone nearly FIVE YEARS and does this. That’s remarkable when you think about it and is one of the greatest performances of all time.

Let’s talk about the match a little bit. It’s an excellent example of how to book a comeback, which is probably Shawn’s greatest strength. Shawn had the people believing that he was DEAD but he kept hanging in there time after time and made the huge comeback just like the crowd wanted. The other thing that works so well is the ending which a lot of people overlook.

The crux of this match was the destruction of both guys and seeing how far they could take it. At the end though, Shawn uses a basic wrestling counter and a cradle to win, totally shifting gears and beating HHH, the Cerebral Assassin, by thinking. That’s INCREDIBLE psychology and the perfect way to end this match. All in all, it’s a masterpiece and arguably the best performance of all time, all things considered.

Post match HHH becomes the universal evil by hitting Shawn square in the back with the sledgehammer and leaving him laying. Shawn is taken out on a stretcher.

Now that we’ve had that amazing match, it’s time for something completely stupid. Howard Finkel of all people has something to say. He’s been here forever and while Major League Baseball may be going on strike, he’ll be here forever. This brings out Trish Stratus who slapped him in the face recently. Howard insults Long Island women and Trish says he has a sexy voice. He makes various references and they hug but it’s a ruse to have Lillian Garcia come in and kick Howard low.

We recap Rock vs. Lesnar. Brock is the new monster and Rock is the warrior champion and there isn’t much more to it than that. The videos of Rocky going through special training (actually for The Rundown) were pretty awesome.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar has his agent Paul Heyman with him. Rock charges into the ring and walks into a belly to belly suplex for two. Lesnar hits a pair of backbreakers for two and we head to the floor with Brock clotheslining him into the crowd. Apparently Rock has bad ribs coming into this match. Back in and Brock hits another overhead belly to belly suplex for two before dropping some elbows. A powerslam puts Rock down for two as this is one sided so far. Brock fires off some shoulder in the corner but misses a charge and hits the post.

Rock hits a belly to back suplex of his own and both guys are down. Both guys nip up at the same time and Rock isn’t sure what to think. Rock hits some clotheslines but it takes three of them to finally drop Brock. The champion hooks a Sharpshooter and Brock is in trouble. Heyman throws in a chair which distracts Rocky, allowing Lesnar to to get out and blast Rock in the ribs with the chair. Off to the bearhug which ended Hogan and takes Rock down to the mat here.

The fans are entirely behind Lesnar here which is very strange to hear. Rock doesn’t let his arm drop a third time and now we get a Rocky chant. The champion finally escapes the hold but gets a hard shoulder into the ribs to slow him down again. Rock comes out of the corner with a running clothesline and the crowd reaction is mixed at best. A series of right hands knocks Lesnar out to the floor and Rock loads up the announce table. After scaring Heyman to death, Rock launches Lesnar face first into the post.

There’s a Rock Bottom through the table for Heyman and the announcers couldn’t be happier. Back in and the Rock Bottom hits Lesnar for a VERY close two. The fans shift affiliation again, now cheering for Brock. Their current hero hits a Rock Bottom of his own for two and both guys stagger to their feet. Rock hits the spinebuster but as he loads up the Elbow, Brock pops up and hits a HUGE clothesline. Here comes the F5 but Rock escapes and tries the Rock Bottom. That and another attempt at the same move are both countered and the F5 gives Lesnar the title.

Rating: B-. The match was just ok until the very hot finish, but the last two minutes or so made up for a lot of the earlier problems. This was a great example of how to make a guy like Lesnar look like a monster. Rock left to film The Rundown immediately after this so Lesnar was the only one left standing. Great way to put Brock over here and a pretty solid match overall.

Lesnar celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: A+. As I said this is considered one of the best shows of all time and it’s easy to see why. The main event was the start of a new era in the company, there’s a masterpiece of a match, the upper half of the card is stacked and the worst match is passable. I can’t put it as high as Wrestlemania X7 on the all time scale but the fact that it’s even in the conversations speaks volumes. This is absolutely worth seeing though and HHH vs. Shawn is must see.

Ratings Comparison

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: A+

Redo: A-

Chris Jericho vs. Ric Flair

Original: B

Redo: C

Eddie Guerrero vs. Edge

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Un-Americans vs. Booker T/Goldust

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Benoit

Original: B

Redo: B

Undertaker vs. Test

Original: D

Redo: D

Shawn Michaels vs. HHH

Original: A+

Redo: A+

The Rock vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Still a masterpiece.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/05/history-of-summerslam-count-up-summerslam-2002-best-summerslam-ever/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Summerslam 2002
Date: August 25, 2002
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial, Uniondale, New York
Attendance: 14,797
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Jim Ross

Another year and more changes have occurred. The main one is simple: the Brand Split. Yes, Raw and Smackdown are now two separate shows etc. However, there is an Undisputed World Champion and his name is the Rock. He’s defending tonight against the greatest rookie sensation of all time: Brock Lesnar. No one had EVER seen anything like Brock and they likely never will. He took the company and the business by storm, winning the shot by beating RVD in the KOTR final.

There were even rumblings that he could actually win the title tonight but that could never happen. What a silly idea. Your other main event is the return of HBK, facing HHH in what is considered a classic. This show is considered to be a rival to Wrestlemania 17 as the greatest WWF PPV of all time, or at least of the new millennium. Now I watched this show a few months after it aired and I remember it being good but not great. Let’s see if this is as good as it’s built up to be.

Oh also, two months prior to this, a new branch of the National Wrestling Alliance debuted: NWA: TNA.

Oh it’s also WWE now.

No opening video this year. That kind of sucks.

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

No real buildup here other than they don’t like each other. Given the amount of matches that they have to put together now, that’s the sacrifice that they had to make I suppose. Angle is wearing red and white stripes with a blue star, making him look like a barber pole. This was back when Rey’s knees weren’t falling apart yet and was close to what he was in WCW, which is to say, amazing. This is about as perfect of a pairing as you could want.

Rey is fast enough to wrestle with heavyweights, while Kurt is small enough and versatile enough to keep up with him. Going for Rey’s ankle makes sense as it could ground him and take away his best asset, so what’s not to like? My answer: nothing. This has been a very good match so far. The fans are very hot for this too so that’s always a perk. Rey keeps getting closer and closer here but Angle keeps getting up.

What you have to keep in mine here is that at the time, Rey wasn’t a huge star like he is now. He was a rookie that only had a handful of experience outside of the cruiserweight ranks. Think of him like a better Evan Bourne and think of Angle like Jericho. Imagine Bourne and Jericho opening a PPV and Bourne getting so close every time but just not being able to put Jericho away, but Jericho can’t win either. That’s where you get this match.

These guys are killing each other out there and it’s great, as neither can put the other away. Rey gets Angle on the floor but the referee won’t let him dive. Rey says screw it and jumps over the referee and lands on Angle in a sweet looking front flip (Do a barrel roll!).

619 (which in WCW wasn’t an attack but rather a fake out) and West Coast Pop get two as Rey doesn’t know what to do. Rey goes up top and flips forward to avoid Kurt and goes for a hurricanrana. Angle more or less jumps forward and grabs the ankle. He goes to the middle and just cranks on it until Rey taps.

Rating: A+. Awesome match. That’s the only way to describe this. These two just went out there and did it. This was back when Rey was relatively healthy before his knees just got destroyed. He’s still good now, but back then he was insane. Rey in WCW was the most fun I’ve ever had watching a wrestler.

If you think Bourne is good, Rey from back then would run circles around him. This was as close as Rey ever got to that in WWE, and it was great. Find this match and watch it as it’s absolutely great. Screw it, this gets an A+.

Stephanie is mad that Bischoff is in her office but she agrees to share it with him for the night, as she proves she just can’t act. She does have nice legs though.

Ross and Lawler are talking about the show, but for some reason they had them really far away from the ring back then. It made no sense to me and just looked odd.

Chris Jericho vs. Ric Flair

Again, no backstory. We get a clip from them fighting on Raw, including Flair breaking all of Fozzy’s equipment, but it’s never explained why they’re fighting in the first place. This was when Flair was still fairly mobile and not all old and disturbing looking. He was only 52 and still could be decent in the ring. Being in there with Jericho is going to help as Jericho can wrestle Flair’s style, and is smart enough to know how to wrestle a Flair match.

See, Flair is considered one of the best of all time because he knew what he did best and it worked with anyone. Flair had a formula, and all he had to do was plug his opponent into that formula for the majority of the match and then have the finish. This was exactly what he did throughout his career in WCW and it hardly ever failed. Yes, Flair’s matches are pretty standard, but they’re also pretty good. I mean his stuff from when he was in his prime mind you.

Go back and watch some of that stuff from the NWA in the mid to late 80s and tell me if you can find a truly bad match. Now not everything is going to be a classic of course, but he hardly ever had a truly bad match. On the rare occasions that he did, it was because the other guy wanted to run the style of the match, which traditionally meant Dusty Rhodes. Rhodes was notorious for insisting on having his style of match, which worked for him and him alone.

Go watch their Starrcade matches and you’ll see what I mean. It’s just not looking like a normal Flair match and it just isn’t that good. Granted, this could be because Dusty just was awful in the ring as he couldn’t go for more than 5 minutes without resting. He was lazy on a snapmare in that match. It’s one of the most basic moves in wrestling and he’s lazy with it.

Anyway, the point of this rant was that at the end of the day, the reason Flair’s stuff was bad near the end of his career was the matches stopped playing to his strengths and became based on what the other guy could do. Flair made a career out of taking a guy that was good and making him great by making him look great.

Look at Sting. He was a good wrestler, but his rivalry with Flair is where he got noticed, because Flair made him look great. In WWE, Vince didn’t let this happen and it caused Flair to look bad and the guys that were against Flair didn’t look as good as they could have.

Ok, rant over at least for now. Once I get going in those things I just can’t stop. For some reason we don’t have Flair’s normal music. It’s the weird imitation that he had back in 92. We’re a minute into this match and they’re already talking about how he beat Rock and Austin in one night. My goodness that is never going to leave. It’s a huge deal but good grief let it die. The WOOS are loud tonight.

This is a stat that blew me away. Jericho has been around for a LONG time right? He was 2 when Flair debuted. That’s just ridiculous. Flair has been wrestling almost as long as Jericho, a veteran at this point, had been alive. Jericho calls a spot to Flair in fairly obvious fashion. He just leans over and whispers it to him. It’s scary to think that Flair, at 52, has miles better cardio than most of the roster in their 20s and 30s. This match has been very physical to say the least.

There are so many little things that Flair does that show why he’s great. It’s not a bunch of big impressive moves with a few botches here or there. It’s a simple, basic style that has practically zero mistakes in it. In other words, it’s not about what he’s doing well. It’s about what he’s not doing wrong. Then the little things like getting the referee looking somewhere else to use a bunch of punches. He plays to the crowd well too.

How sad is it that so many people today would be clueless about how to do this? We get a cool sequence where Flair goes for the Boston Crab and Jericho gets a figure four, showing how fairly stupid it is to have finishers like that which almost anyone can do. That’s why I like the liontamer, the one with the knee in the back, more. No one else uses it. Apparently over time the amount of points that the figure four puts pressure on has gone from 5 in Gordon Solie’s days to 7 now.

In a brilliant move, Flair grabs the ropes and taps. The thing is, since the hold should be broken, the submission can’t count. That’s a very smart thing to do as it buys him a lot of time. Referee gets a thumb in the eye, or maybe a short knee (rep for the first person that gets what I’m talking about) allowing Flair to low blow Jericho and put on the figure four. Anyone think it’s a bit sexual looking when Flair bounces up and down while in it? Yeah I never thought that either. Jericho taps.

Rating: B. While not as good as the other match, this was still very solid. As good as Flair is though, I’m not sure I’m sold on him practically beating Jericho, who was world champion earlier in the year, clean. It was a very good match with Flair being the better of the two, but still, it just had me kind of wondering.

Promo for Hogan DVD.

Heyman is with Lesnar and talks about him ending Hogan’s career. Lesnar is a freaking tank.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Edge

Dang 3 matches and 6 world champions. Again, very limited backstory here as they just don’t have the time to do it. As awesome as Edge’s old music was, he desperately needs something more hardcore at this point. He’s rocking the glasses and the trench coat though so you can see the future Edge trying to get out. However, in less than 6 months he’d be out for over a year, so that kind of got put on hold.

Apparently Eddie is upset about Edge being popular and a sex symbol (really?). That’s almost creepy given who Edge would be married to on WWE TV. Just as I say that about Edge’s injury, he might have gotten hurt. He has a bit of a stinger according to Tazz, who would know something about having a Steve Borden. If he is hurt, Eddie doesn’t seem to care at all.

In case you didn’t know, Edge is a HUGE face here and way over with the crowd. Apparently it’s Edge’s shoulder….er neck…..maybe shoulder…..can the commentators make up their freaking minds?? Either way, Eddie is crushing him right now. Eddie is just going insane on Edge’s shoulder, so if nothing else we have a simple story going on that works really well. If nothing else, how can Edge spear someone if his shoulder is killing him without hurting himself really badly?

The main thing of this match is nothing more than Eddie working over the shoulder. Frog Splash misses but after a brief Edge comeback including the Impaler, Eddie hits a splash down onto the shoulder. Of course, because he’s the charismatic face though, Edge is able to spear Eddie without his arm falling off for the pin.

Rating: C+. The ending just ruined this for me. I got into Eddie’s shoulder work, but then when Edge more or less no sold it at the end, it was a total waste in my eyes. What’s the point in working an injury and taking away a guy’s finishing move if the other guy is just going to no sell it and use his move anyway? That was just bad and made me shake my head, which sucks as the match was pretty good.

Tag Titles: UnAmericans vs. Booker T/Goldust

Now this was a gimmick that I thought was very solid. Christian and Lance Storm represent the UnAmericans here, with Test being the third member of the trio. In short: they don’t like America. They were given the tag titles but very soon after this the gimmick was just completely dropped. I’ve never quite gotten why though. Either way, the odd thing here was that Booker and Goldust were also a team, yet they have absolutely nothing in common.

Hearing the announcers try to give them something in common really is quite funny. The fact that they’re both from Texas never really seemed to sink in. Either way, they were a fairly decent team, albeit they were far more comedic than serious, but Booker would be pushed towards the title picture soon and then put into a serious team with RVD, so all is good I suppose.

Anyway, on with the match. Hearing Lawler try desperately to make Booker and Goldust pro-America is rather interesting, as he compares them to the Great American Melting Pot without ever referring to it as such. The USA chants are really loud to say the least, so if nothing else the heels are drawing heat like they’re supposed to be. Ross’ repetition is nothing short of annoying.

Goldust hits a Bossman Slam as I try to come up with a connection between those two and it’s not working. We get a classic ref didn’t see the tag spot which needs to be done more often. It’s as simple of a way to draw heat as there is in a tag match. This crowd is HOT. Booker gets his own chant as he’s clearly the big star in this match. We knew he was a big deal, but they didn’t push him as such until March, when he was fed to HHH.

Oddly enough, HHH had everyone on the planet fed to him until tonight when he let Shawn, his old buddy, have a classic with him. It’s not like these jokes have no basis in reality, but I’ll save that rant for later…maybe. Anyway, Booker finally gets the hot tag to a huge pop. He throws chops at Christian so fast that the crowd can’t WOO fast enough. That’s actually pretty impressive.

Booker hits his missile dropkick which would have won him the world title in WCW but since this is the WWF and Christian is for some reason popular, he kicks out at two. It always amazes me how a finishing move can just lose its power over the course of a year. Booker spins up as Mark Madden gets another ego boost.

The faces dominate for a good while until Test runs out and kicks Booker’s head off to keep the titles for the heels. On replay, we see the referee looking right at Test leaving as Booker is left lying. Yeah that makes sense. The Smackdown tag titles would be debuted in about two months.

Rating: C-. This was about as cookie cutter of a match as you could have imagined. While it’s ok, it’s just ok. Booker and Goldust would eventually get the titles later on in January for all of two weeks. It wasn’t bad, but just not great.

Nidia does some stupid thing at the World, which is the new name for WWF New York.

Eric and Stephanie make some stupid sex jokes.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Benoit vs. RVD

This is cross promotional, so we have two announcers which is both kind of cool and kind of stupid. Benoit and Eddie have been jumping rosters lately, going from Raw where he won the title to Smackdown. The US Title on Smackdown was about a year away at this point, so there was only the midcard title on Smackdown. Van Dam kicks the freaking heck out of Benoit to start, so you know this is going to be physical to say the least.

This was a weird time for these two as Van Dam was kind of replacing Angle in the triad of the midcard. You always had Benoit and Jericho, but Angle was always a step ahead of those two, and eventually as he was phased up into the main event, Van Dam was thrown into the middle of the card more or less as an experiment and I’d say that it was a success. Frog splash misses and Benoit gets the crossface, which he locks on for about 30 seconds.

No tap though as we’re really just getting going. Over the course of the next 5 minutes or so, Benoit gets another two crossfaces on Van Dam who STILL doesn’t tap as we’re entering HBK at Mania 12 territories of not giving up. In a nice touch of comedy (in my eyes at least), Van Dam locks in the crossface, at least I think that’s what it is although he never was one for submission holds, on Benoit.

This lasts all of 4 seconds though as Benoit is the master of it so why wouldn’t he be able to get out of it? I’m not wild on the two matches with focus on the shoulder like this, but in this case it makes much more sense with Benoit’s finisher focusing on the shoulder. I guess with Eddie and Edge it made sense due to some psychology being thrown in, but I’m still not wild about it at all.

In something I never once remember seeing before, Van Dam’s hair tie comes undone and his hair is freely flowing. I’ve never seen that before and I really don’t like it. He looks almost like Tyler Reks with it like that, which works fine for the surfer, but it just doesn’t look right on Robbie V. I’m thinking I forgot a Ross joke here. That’s going to bother me now. The ending here is just not that great.

Benoit has a belly to back suplex countered as Van Dam rolls over onto him and lands in kind of a cross body/splash. In a very nice looking move, Van Dam looks down at Benoit from the top rope with Benoit’s feet pointing to him. He turns in the air and lands a Five Star for the pin and the title. Really not huge on that ending, as it’s just kind of there. There’s not a lot of drama as Van Dam just jumps up and hits the splash and pins him. However, a guy winning a title clean is a very refreshing thing to see. There was no interference or anything. Van Dam simply countered and hit his finishing move to get the pin. That’s both good and bad I guess, but the rest of the match was good so I’ll take it.

Rating: B. This was very intense and well done. It’s probably Van Dam’s biggest win of his career up to that point and is probably one of the biggest of his career even to this day, with the world title obviously being ahead of it. He beat Benoit, one of the best ever, clean. If that’s not validation of his ability at least on one night, I don’t know what is. Very good match though and worth checking out.

Stephanie, with those gorgeous legs showing very well, before laughing for no apparent reason at Bischoff bragging. Not sure what this led to, but it might have been the US Title. Actually that’s not it, as the IC Title would soon be unified with the world title, in one of the biggest head scratchers of all time. It would be revived about 8 months later when everyone realized how truly stupid it was, and THAT would bring about the US Title.

We’re getting ready for Test and the Undertaker. JR says a lot of people want to know who the UnAmericans are, why they’re here, and why they’re doing this. In short: Lance Storm, Christian and Test, they’re professional wrestlers and TNA was a baby at this time and since Vince had more or less created a monopoly there was nowhere else to work, and they’re Canadians that don’t like Americans. Why is that such a complicated thing to figure out?

The UnAmericans carry around an upside down American flag to symbolize how messed up America is. That’s either brilliant or really stupid. They keep saying they hate America, so the American wants to beat up Test. On a side note, William Regal would join them later on. Taker’s punches were called soup bones for no apparent reason around this time, as JR continues to get further and further away from this lovely little thing called reality.

Oh yeah we’re in the Tough Enough era here and Tough Enough 3 was going on. The winner of that was one John Hennigan. You may know him as John Morrison. The other winner was named Matt Cappotelli, and while you may not have heard of him, I was lucky enough to see him in OVW.

He was absolutely awesome and I can guarantee you of this: he would have been either as big a star as Morrison or far bigger. The guy had that X factor to him and you knew he would have been something very special. His retirement speech almost had me in tears. I wish I could find a copy of it.

Undertaker vs. Test

You won’t hear this, but JR says that Test has been living on nothing but potential forever. How true that is of so many workers today. This is part of the UnAmericans vs. everyone else so Taker busts out a hiptoss of all things as he dominates early. The big clothesline hits but Old School is blocked to let Test take over.

Test’s fairly generic big man offense takes over. This is rather slow paced and not very interesting. Taker gets a belly to belly to get out of most of the trouble but an elbow misses. They slug it out which of course Taker wins which lets him get a running DDT for two. Old School connects and the bigger man is in control.

Test’s big boot misses and a chokeslam gets two which is probably the high point of Test’s career. Christian and Storm run in which gets them nowhere. It does however allow Test to get his big boot for two as Test PANICS since the one solid move he knows did nothing at all. He grabs a chair but it gets kicked into his own ugly face and a Tombstone ends it. That was a rarity at this point so it was cool to see. He celebrates with the flag afterwards.

Rating: D. This wasn’t that good. It was certainly more about the angle than the match, and while there are occasions that I’ll make exceptions for that such as Hogan vs. Andre, this isn’t one of those occasions. It’s just not good as their styles were too similar and while Taker is good enough, Test just didn’t care at this point and it shows. Solid angle, bad match, as Test just wasn’t in Taker’s league, ever.

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Taker is just now leaving, so that was an extended celebration I guess.

We start the build for what I think (and yes it’s very debatable) was your real main event. Shawn hasn’t wrestled in over 1600 days. That’s a lot of sleepless nights for Becca. Lawler says that a lot of these people have never seen Shawn wrestle, which means that a lot of people have never heard of home video obviously, or Lawler thinks it’s 1940 and there’s no such thing as taping a match.

In case you’ve never heard it, here’s the basic build for this match. Shawn and HHH were in DX together as you likely know. However, Shawn got hurt and HHH took over DX and became the star that he is today. Now, in the Summer of 2002, Shawn came back for a night, unbeknownst to us, healthy and sober. That night, it seemed to be all about Shawn again, which was unfair to HHH who had actually had a more successful career as far as title reigns and time on top than Shawn had.

That night, Shawn came up with the idea of reforming DX (I want that man shot) and HHH went along with it, or at least he did in the beginning. They do the two words line, but then HHH kicks him and pedigrees him. You can tell this is serious because it goes into slow motion. HHH hits a very weird pedigree as he jumps way too high and it looks like Shawn was countering it with a backdrop.

Anyway, HHH says that Shawn used HHH to get to the top, so now HHH used Shawn to get to the top, which makes even less sense but whatever. Now this is the part of the storyline that I never understood. HHH is cutting the promo in the ring where he says all of that stuff. Ok, that’s fine. A guy gets his attention and says that something happened.

HHH bolts from the ring and goes off to find a bunch of guys around Shawn who is laid out on the ground bleeding and there’s a hole in the window of a car. HHH says he’ll find who did it and when he does, that person is a marked man. Shawn comes back a few weeks later for a satellite interview, and he has the footage from the security camera, and naturally it’s HHH. As I’ve said many times, what’s the point?

For one thing, why wouldn’t it have been HHH? He’s cutting a promo about how he can’t stand Shawn, and since Shawn has been back for all of 2 weeks, why wouldn’t it have been him? Seriously, who else was it supposed to have been? Why wouldn’t they have just shown it being him, maybe ending the show like that, and THEN have the interview where Shawn challenges him for Summerslam? HHH says that he did it to prove a point, which was that Shawn is vulnerable.

Ok, that’s all well and good, but WHY WOULD HE GO ON A FREAKING MANHUNT IF HE DID IT? That makes no sense! What’s the point in turning him heel one week, turning him face for two weeks, and THEN revealing him to be the mastermind for lack of a better term, thus turning him heel all over again? It’s just pure overkill and was absurd. ANYWAY, Shawn says that he’ll be completely recovered by Summerslam. So let me get this straight.

Shawn couldn’t get better from a broken back, which is something that could have paralyzed him, in four and a half years, but if you cut him on the head he’ll recover in less than a month? Are you telling me that all Shawn had to do to completely be healed was cut himself shaving? If that’s the case, Becca might have a fit. This match is non-sanctioned, which Bischoff says means that it never happens. HHH says the logical thing: Oh Eric, but it will happen.

See, that’s my issue with matches that never happen. YES THEY DID! When you erase something from the record books, people still remember the matches themselves. That’s why taking down banners for basketball games or erasing wins is freaking stupid. The games were played, and therefore we’re going to remember who won, who lost, by how much, and what kind of shoes they were wearing.

The match not only happened, it happened in a WWE ring, on a WWE PPV, had WWE commentators and had a WWE referee, but people know who freaking won it! The match DID happen, so what’s the point in saying it’s non-sanctioned? If it was non-sanctioned, then this would be happening in a parking lot somewhere instead of in front of 14,000 people. Since it’s not an official match, why is HHH in wrestling gear?

Does he wear that in his everyday life? Is there constantly a referee following him around to check and see if he wants to go for a pin? Does he think he’s Nighthawk and that he’s competing to become Champion of Wrestling (OCW joke for those of you that have NO clue what I mean)? Are you starting to see how stupid this really is? Just call it what it is: a WWE street fight. It sounds better, it looks better, and above all else: IT MAKES SENSE!!!

They get a full music video before the match here, which actually does show off how great of a match this could be. HHH’s line of “YOU CAN’T WRESTLE ANYMORE!” while as corny as it sounds, actually tells the whole story here in just four words.

That’s the sign of a good promo: it sums up everything simply, without having to use a big elaborate bunch of words to fill in time. All that being said though, the buildup had you actually believing that something special was coming, and for those of you that have seen it, you know that it is. For those of you that haven’t, be ready to enjoy.

HHH vs. HBK

Before I begin, one note that I’m likely to forget. In an interview that HHH gave about Shawn and this match in particular, he says that this was a 45 minute match. From what I’ve seen, it clocks in at about 27-30. That’s a far cry from 45 if my math is correct, but I digress. To say the pop for HBK’s music is massive would be like saying Hogan was a little over.

The flashbulbs are going off all over the place as this is actually a very epic moment. It’s not like Shawn was doing nothing when he left. He was wrestling in the main event at a major show as the world champion and he retained. It’s fairly obvious that he would have gotten at least a rematch with Austin at Backlash and likely have been champion again somewhere down the road. However, it’s likely that his addictions would have caused major problems.

Geez I need to stop these tangents. He gets the mega star treatment which he deserves, including pyro, confetti, etc. He’s actually looking like it’s a non-sanctioned fight, wearing an undershirt and jeans. His shirt says Philippians 4:13, which for you football geeks is what Tim Tebow has on his eye black in every games. For those of you that don’t know who that is, watch some real football, not that nonsense they play in Europe and find out.

For those of you that have no idea what it means, it’s a Bible verse that reads “For I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” That makes a lot of sense for this match. Usually I want the face to come out last and get the big pop, but here I think it’s better that Shawn came out first. Also, Lawler says that no one in history has had more charisma than Shawn.

Not sure about that King. I’m thinking of a guy in red and yellow. He posed a lot, kind of made wrestling what it is today. In an odd fact that you may not know, the man who wears red and yellow, despite many tries, has never once beaten Jerry Lawler by pinfall. They fought dozens of times, but Lawler never lost cleanly to him. SCREW these tangents!

HHH gets the booing to end all booing. You have to keep in mind: HHH is at about the level here that he’s at today, so it’s not like Shawn was coming back to fight Dolph Ziggler or someone like that. He was taking on one of the very best. Shawn is all calm here, even doing the lay on the rope like a hammock thing. I really like that actually, as it plays to Shawn’s laid back persona that he had when he was at his peak.

If he was all serious and angry that would have made sense too, but I think this actually works a bit better. Shawn starts fast, throwing his PERFECT towel in HHH’s face and punching him. Apparently this is due to his Texas pride. What in the world does Texas pride have to do with this? He jumped him. Isn’t that being a bit cowardly actually? Why am I trying to make sense of something JR said?

Shawn starts by throwing punches for the most part, but within two minutes he launches over the top rope with a plancha, followed by more punches. That’s a very smart idea actually. Shawn has been out of the ring for four and a half years. It’s not like he’s going to be the Shawn that was wrestling just before the injury. He’s going to have a lot of ring rust, so punching makes sense.

Also, it’s a good safety advertisement for kids and adults. Since this isn’t an actual match, it’s not actual wrestling right? Therefore, Shawn not doing a lot of wrestling moves is showing that people shouldn’t try this at home. Now it’s ok to punch someone’s head in, but don’t try to slam them. We get weapons brought in, namely the trashcan of death, as JR talks about Shawn’s son watching at home.

There’s a great parenting lesson: if you’re ever possibly walking into a match where you have little to no chance of winning and could be paralyzed because your pride got in the way of your thinking, make sure your kids are watching, because it could be your only chance to look good for them. Sweet Chin Music misses and HHH lands a backbreaker, which Shawn sells like death, opening the main psychology of this match, which was to be expected.

You know, you’d think that after four and a half years his back would be a bit better. Oh, Lawler has used vintage four times inside of 5 minutes. I wonder if that’s where Cole got it. You can almost see the Harley Race coming out of HHH already as he looks just pure evil. Ross says that WWE has nothing to do with this match as I am fighting from rehashing what I said earlier.

Chair is brought in and cracked over Shawn’s back, but since he has HEART, he can kick out of what would pin others, despite it being his weakest point. JR says HHH is 6’4 and a half and weighs 260, despite him being listed as 272 just 8 minutes ago. I feel like I’m watching a Captain Planet parody with all these heart references. DDT on a chair which should have crippled someone but he kicks out with ease, but he’s bleeding.

Lawler says this match may have been the biggest mistake of Shawn’s career. He hung out with Luna, so that’s a big negative there King. HHH gets the sledgehammer as Shawn fights him off. HHH goes for an abdominal stretch which I’m sure has Gorilla Monsoon complaining in his grave. HHH grabs the rope, which I’m still trying to figure out how that actually adds anything to the hold.

Earl Hebner yells at HHH about it and you can tell he means business because he has a mic on him, but keep in mind: this IS NOT a real match. Shawn gets crotched on the top rope as a little bit of Becca’s soul dies. Another chair shot to the back would normally end anyone else’s career, but SHAWN HAS HEART! I know I’ve made fun of a lot of this, but this match really has been good.

I’m rarely a person that can pick out specific things a guy does in a match, but even I can tell that HHH is a master heel. They do a spot where HHH sets up a chair and Shawn is side slammed through it. If it broke then it hurts horribly, and if it doesn’t break then it hurts like the 7th circle of torment. We get probably the 5th spot that would kill anyone else, but Shawn has….screw it even I’m getting tired of that joke.

JR says Shawn is limp. I’m sure Becca could fix that. Ok I’ll try to keep the Becca jokes to a minimum now. Shawn starts his comeback in his comeback match by countering the pedigree. The fans are white hot here, even 15 minutes into this. From out of nowhere, Shawn gets Sweet Chin Music into a chair but Shawn is spent, which makes sense. The psychology is definitely here, as it’s always nice to have guys that actually know how to work the mental side of a match as these two do. HHH is busted.

Ok, now this is just getting ridiculous. Shawn has had maybe 5 moves that would have ended any match with ease, including a DDT on a chair, and 5 minutes later he’s fine? Even Hulk Hogan thinks that’s a bit much to swallow from Shawn. Becca says…never mind. All of a sudden Shawn is limping around again, so I guess I can buy the adrenaline excuse. JR calls the chair shot a Jason Giambi like swing which makes me laugh. Of all the power hitters in history he picks him?

The commentators have a crazy idea: Shawn could win. I get that this is supposed to be his last hurrah, but is it that hard to believe? Ok yes it would have been at the time. The fans want tables, so HHH is put on the most famous one of all time: The Portuguese Announce Table! In a weird spot, Shawn pulls the shoe from one of the commentators, which Lawler says is a heel for a heel as I can’t believe he still has a job at this point.

You can say heel but you can’t say belt or strap? It’s ladder time. DAng why can’t it be wiggle time? HHH gets a solid shot right in the hand with it. In case you didn’t know, this is non-sanctioned. Did you know it’s non-sanctioned? I just want to make it clear that this is non-sanctioned. And last but not least, it’s non-sanctioned. HHH busts out a baseball slide as two things happen: he uses a new move so screw you HHH haters, and I am WAY past my record for talking about one match.

You can tell this is a big match as HHH goes up top. Shawn gets a weird float around sunset flip but he shoves himself off at two because the spot looks bad if HHH kicks out on his own. JR randomly throws in how evil HHH is. That is yet another example of why I love professional wrestling. Where else could someone try to cripple you but just a few years later you’re best friends again and fighting on PPV together?

That must have been one heck of a Christmas card that HHH sent him. “Hey man, sorry about that whole wanting you in a wheelchair thing and the attempted manslaughter. Next time we hit Waffle House, you can get a Coke on me.” Drop toehold into the stairs for HHH and we actually get a realistic looking impact. Why are tables such a big deal? It’s not like they’re that deadly.

Wouldn’t it actually break the fall a bit as you have less time in freefall? Shawn comes off with a splash from the top to the floor with a table, which is just cool looking no matter how long he’s been out. The holy crap chants have started, which is fine as this match is awesome. Correction: this match is greatness. There is a difference. The odd thing about that though is that this is really just an extended hardcore match with big names.

They’re hardly doing anything revolutionary, yet the match certainly is great. I think that goes to show just how awesome both of these guys are. They’re taking stuff that we’ve seen dozens of times before but by using storytelling and style, they’re making it look better than ever. Shawn lands the Screw You elbow and bounces up. The old school stomping on the mat clues HHH in to what’s coming and it’s countered into the Pedigree, but Shawn rolls him up to shock the world and win the match.

Normally I would have been for the Sweet Chin Music and the clean pin, but with that we can’t have what follows: HHH drilling him in the back with the hammer to become Satan incarnate. He then does it AGAIN to make Satan look like a baby bunny named Lucy.

Lawler is absolutely losing it in some of the best commentary I’ve ever seen. Ross sounds like any other heinous act, but Lawler is probably at his best ever here. The fans are chanting for HBK, but since he’s not Hulk Hogan, he can’t get up. Shawn is stretchered out as the fans are almost dead silent.

Rating: A+. Holy crap this was awesome. You have to remember, Shawn hadn’t done a freaking thing in nearly 5 years. This would be like Austin coming back and stealing the show and having one of the best matches of his life. Both guys were so on here that it’s not even funny.

Norcal says it’s in the top 5 matches of all time and I’m not sure I can disagree. I might not rank it that high, but dang it was fun. Easily one of the best I’ve ever seen and if you haven’t seen it before, turn the lights out and watch it right now. It’s certainly worth the 30 (not 45 HHH) minutes.

Ok, now I have to bring this up because it was the talk of the IWC around this time. As you know, HHH gets a LOT of criticism for never putting people over and while today that’s complete nonsense, those complaints started around this time and I think that at this time they were completely true. “But KB, he JUST put Shawn over.” Yes he did, but you have to remember that at this time no one, not even Vince himself thought that Shawn was coming back full time.

This was a one off performance and that was it. It’s no different than when Hogan came back and beat Orton and HBK. He had nothing to lose but he didn’t put them over as they needed. It’s no different here. HBK didn’t need to win here, given the circumstances at the time. Yes, HHH put someone over, but he put someone over that didn’t need it. Less than a month after this HHH would be awarded the WHC and after a brief Shawn run HHH would hold it for over 9 months.

In that time he beat everyone and beat them soundly. That right there is where he got the reputation for never putting anyone over, and I think those are valid claims. Prior to this he had won the title at Mania 18 and lost it to Hogan, who was just another nostalgia run like HBK was right here. In other words, for over a year and a half, HHH put over HBK, his best friend, and Hogan, the biggest star of all time.

Starting with the creation of the Undisputed Title in December of 2001 and ending with Wrestlemania 21 almost three and a half years later, the longest HHH wert without being world champion: just under four and a half months. Once the second title was created in September of this year or about 2 weeks after this show until Mania 21 (Batista and Cena winning the world titles): 5 months.

Both of these times he was feuding with HBK for the majority of the time. Therefore, I think there certainly was something to those claims back then that he was either playing politics or hogging the title while refusing to put anyone over, as he was either champion or feuding with HBK.

Since we had an amazing moment, we follow it with a bit that is supposed to be funny. This was the Get The F Out campaign because of those panda lovers.

JR and Lawler don’t think HHH is a very nice person. No valentine’s day cards for them.

Howard Finkel has something to say as we have entered the Twilight Zone. He says that he’s dedicated to the business and while MLB may be going on strike (they didn’t), the fans will always have the Fink. For no reason at all, Trish comes out for this. Apparently….they’ve been feuding?

Like I said in my Smackdown review, it’s kind of awesome hearing Fink’s voice being ticked off. Trish hits on him for some reason. Howard references a certain part of his body as my scars are scarred for life. Lillian is behind them and she beats up Fink and leaves with Trish. Aside from having two very hot women appear, this may have been the most pointless segment I’ve ever seen.

We see a promo package on the rise of Brock and how Rock has been training “specially” for this match, which means he’s getting in shape to film the Rundown.

WWF Title: Rock vs. Brock Lesnar

After all that, Tony Chimmel is announcing. Brock’s music is great and Heyman is in his element as the jerk agent. This match was Rock’s very last time being around any title period as he would make one last 3 month run in the spring, beating Hogan and Austin before putting Goldberg over and riding off into Hollywood, only appearing for Mania the next year.

Basically, this was to launch Brock as high up as they could in one match and I don’t think I’ve ever seen it done better. Rock was really just a trophy champion at this point, having no title matches and never really being the focus of the show at all. Since Austin was on hiatus at this point, Rock was all they had left as HHH was busy with HBK. They figured they would roll the dice on Brock and just see what happened.

There’s not a lot to say here other than Brock is destroying him. I mean this is almost an extended squash, with the fans all over Rock. It’s a smark crowd so I’m assuming they know Rock is gone after tonight. Either way, Rock is getting booed out of the building here and the fans LOVE Brock, who was turned face about three months later at Survivor Series. Actually it was a bit before, but it was official that night as Heyman turned on him, making Brock face by default.

Brock puts on a bearhug which I kid you not lasts nearly three minutes. Granted, it’s the hug that killed Hogan off, but DANG that’s a long time. After the nap I was taking ends with them finally doing something, they go to the floor and Lesnar is down. During this time, Heyman gets the worst Rock Bottom of all time through the table. Back in, Rock hits the Rock Bottom and Lesnar kicks out because that’s what monster heels do.

He hits his own Rock Bottom which Tazz calls, say it with me, the Brock Bottom, and yes, it is stupider than it sounds. They trade punches with Rock winning and going for the Elbow but Brock pops up to just take his head off with a clothesline. That was one of the hardest moves I’ve ever seen.

We get a great series of near finishers and counters, but Brock lands the F5 to completely shock the world and win the title as the fans go nuts. The ending is really fast with clichéd lines like the next big thing has arrived. I think they were pressed for time or something here because the show is over maybe 15 seconds after the pin without even a single replay.

Rating: C+. This again wasn’t about the wrestling but what it meant. As I said this was Brock’s big moment and they couldn’t have put him over any stronger if their lives depended on it. He dismantled Rock and made it look easy. Of course they would screw this up royally by putting him with Big Show who would injure him at a house show because he was too fat for Brock to throw around without hurting himself.

Scratch that. Brock could throw him around, but Show just sucked badly at this time. Either way they had no choice but to give Show the belt in an angle that was just horrid as it made Brock look pretty weak. Also, less than two weeks after this the Undisputed belt is made exclusive to Smackdown which I think is what Stephanie was laughing about earlier.

Anyway it leads to HHH being given (literally) the World Heavyweight Championship which Shawn would win at Survivor Series in the first Elimination Chamber. DAng I got off topic again. Anyway, Brock was awesome, Rock put him over and bailed, and Austin was long gone, so Brock is officially a big deal.

Overall Rating: A+. This show is awesome, but HHH/HBK should have gone on last, plain and simple. It was by far and away the bigger story and got more attention. Also, after that match, the fans weren’t spent but they weren’t as alive as they could have been for the title change.

Other than that, I don’t have any issue with this show. It’s solid all around with nothing bad on it at all. I’ve heard it compared to Mania 17 and while I don’t think it’s better or equal to it, it beats anything for second place at least off the top of my head. Highest recommendation all around here.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam 2001
Date: August 19, 2001
Location: Compaq Center, San Jose, California
Attendance: 15,293
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

Much like last year, a lot has changed in the last year. For one thing the Monday Night Wars are over and the WWF has absorbed the other two major companies to form the superpower that they are to this day. At the moment though we’re in the middle of the Invasion war, meaning it’s WCW/ECW vs. the WWF. That’s your double main event tonight: Rock vs. Booker T for the WCW Title and Angle vs. Austin (in the Alliance) for the WWF Title. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a WWF themed music video for Bodies by Drowning Pool. That’s still the best live performance of a song I’ve ever heard.

Intercontinental Title: Edge vs. Lance Storm

Storm is champion and is about to explain why there is no place for offbeat shenanigans around here but Edge cuts him off. Feeling out process to start as they trade hammerlocks and headlocks. A flapjack and dropkick put Storm down and Edge clotheslines him to the floor. Back in and Edge gets two off a high cross as the announcers bicker about the Invasion. Storm drapes Edge over the top rope and knocks him into the barricade.

Back in and Storm works on the ribs with some knees and a front suplex for two. The crowd is very hot tonight. The spear misses but Edge kicks away from the Mapleleaf and gets two off a small package. We see the WWF guys cheering Edge on from the locker room. Edge tries a crucifix but gets countered into a rolling senton for two. We hit the chinlock with a knee in Edge’s back before a backsplash gets two.

Off to an abdominal stretch from the champion but he’s too far away to pull on the ropes. Edge hiptosses out and sends Storm to the apron for a springboard clothesline but Edge catches him in a powerslam to put both guys down. They slug it out with Edge taking over via some clotheslines and a spinwheel kick for two.

Edge-O-Matic gets two and a hurricanrana is countered into a powerbomb for two on Storm. They hit the ropes and Storm rolls through into the half crab. Edge finally makes a rope and puts the same hold on Storm as the referee is bumped. Here’s Christian who accidentally spears his brother, giving Storm two. Not that it matters as Edge pops up and hits the Edgecution for the pin and the title.

Rating: B-. I liked this more than I should have but I’m a fan of both guys. This was a nice choice for an opener as it was very technically sound and gave the fans something to get excited for with a new champion. Not that the title changing means anything in the grand scheme of the Invasion but it’s not like anything really did.

Test says he didn’t turn his back on the WWF but vice versa. He praises the Dudleys and says they’ll take out Spike and the APA tonight. Test will show us what loyalty is tonight.

Chris Jericho calls Stephanie a big sl** and says he’ll beat Rhyno tonight.

APA/Spike Dudley vs. Test/Dudley Boys

Spike has the incredibly cute Molly (looking very good in blue) with him here. Test cost the APA the tag titles a few weeks ago due to them accusing him of being the Alliance mole. Bubba starts with Faarooq as Heyman calls Spike a bully. The Dudleys quickly double team Faarooq with the reverse 3D until it’s D-Von taking him down with a clothesline and back elbow. Off to Test who gets caught in the wrong corner, allowing for the tag to Bradshaw.

A powerbomb is countered by a Test backdrop and it’s back to D-Von to pound away in the corner. Spike comes in with a quick small package and rollup for two each on D-Von but Bubba gets a blind tag and LAUNCHES Spike onto the top rope to take over. Bubba comes in and stomps away in the corner before it’s off to Test to pound on the very pale Spike. D-Von pulls out a table but Spike saves himself from being thrown through it. Back to D-Von for a HUGE double flapjack from both Dudleys. I’m not a Spike fan but he could be in some very impressive crashes.

D-Von misses a middle rope splash and it’s hot tag to Bradshaw who meets Test. Faarooq comes in as well and the APA cleans house but D-Von breaks up the fallaway slam. A powerbomb puts Test down but Bubba breaks up the pin. The Dudley Dog is countered with Spike being launched through the table and here’s Shane McMahon with a chair to knock Bradshaw silly, giving Test the pin.

Rating: D+. Pretty pedestrian stuff here but I’ve seen worse. The majority of this was Spike getting destroyed and very little between the APA and the Dudleys. Test was the focus of this match which isn’t the most interesting idea in the world but at least they were trying. Shane running in is kind of questionable for a match at this level but he’s a loyal owner (of WCW) I guess.

WWF stars congratulate Edge on the title win but brags about getting a European Title match. Grandma calls but wants to talk to Edge. Christian isn’t happy.

Shawn Stasiak comes in to see Debra (Steve Austin’s wife) and thinks he should change his trunks. He was a pretty funny comedy guy who was trying to get noticed at this point but Debra throws him out.

Light Heavyweight Title/Cruiserweight Title: Tajiri vs. X-Pac

X-Pac is holding the more famous title and this is winner take all. Tajiri is the big crowd favorite but both guys are WWF wrestlers. X-Pac uses the referee to backflip out of a top wristlock. Tajiri takes him down with ease and hits a standing moonsault for two but X-Pac rides him on the mat and slaps him in the back of the head. A hurricanrana sends Pac to the floor and a big Asai Moonsault takes him down.

Pac pops right back up and crotches Tajiri against the post to take over. Back in and X-Pac puts on a surfboard but has to let it go to avoid getting pinned. X-Pac misses the Bronco Buster and gets caught in the Tree of Woe, setting up a baseball slide to the face. Another big kick to the head gets two for Tajiri. There’s the Tarantula by Tajiri but it doesn’t last long, as always.

Tajiri loads up a top rope hurricanrana but Pac kicks him off, only to have Tajiri pull him down into a kind of standing backslide pinning combination for two. A German suplex gets two on Tajiri but Pac sends him to the floor for a big flip dive. Back in and the X-Factor gets two and here’s Albert (Tensai, Pac’s stable mate). Tajiri hits the mist on Albert but gets hit low and the second X-Factor unifies the titles (for about two months).

Rating: D+. Well that happened. There wasn’t anything special at all to this title as the Light Heavyweight division means nothing at all and never did, making this a boring match that no one cared about. Foley summed up the division perfectly in a promo in a few months: “X-Pac hasn’t been around in a few months and I don’t think anyone noticed.”

A very confused Perry Saturn is looking for his love, Moppy (an actual mop) at WWF New York. Someone kidnapped her and her face is on a milk carton. This is one of the guys that was a coup in the Radicalz deal people.

Stephanie gives Rhyno a pep talk and she still can’t act.

We recap Jericho vs. Stephanie which went on for months with Stephanie sending Rhyno after Chris, resulting in him Goring Jericho through the Smackdown set. I’d still have loved to see a Jericho/Stephanie on screen romance with them insulting each other so much that they became infatuated with each other.

Chris Jericho vs. Rhyno

Stephanie is at ringside of course. Rhyno runs him over a few times to start but a cross body takes the big man down. A top rope elbow to the head drops Rhyno and a jumping back elbow to the jaw gets two. The Walls don’t work and Rhyno bails to the floor, sending Jericho to the top. Stephanie grabs his foot and the delay lets Rhyno get up and Gore Jericho out of the air to take over.

Back in and Rhyno drops the injured ribs over the top rope and stomps away like a good monster heel would. Stephanie adds a LOUD slap and Rhyno hooks a body scissors to make Jericho scream. Back up and Rhyno hooks an airplane spin of all things to set up a TKO for two. Off to a surfboard with a knee in Jericho’s back but Jericho fights up and gets a rollup for two. A suplex puts Jericho right back down and weakens the ribs even more.

Rhyno goes up top and misses a splash that would have missed even if Jericho hadn’t moved. A double clothesline puts both guys down to give us a breather. Back up and Rhyno charges into a boot to the face and Jericho hits a middle rope missile dropkick. Stephanie finally gets involved by distracting the referee so Jericho kisses her to the floor. The Lionsault kind of hits for two and the fans are surprised at the kickout. Rhyno comes back with a big spinebuster before putting on a Liontamer (not the Walls of Jericho. It’s a different move). Jericho finally crawls over to the ropes for the break but walks into a belly to belly which looks to set up the Gore. Chris dives out of the way to send Rhyno into the buckle, setting up the Walls for the submission.

Rating: B-. I liked this a lot more than I should have as it really wasn’t anything special. Jericho and Stephanie had some great chemistry that it’s almost impossible to not smile at their antics. Rhyno was a fine monster for Jericho to slay to make Stephanie even angrier and the match was better than I was expecting. Good stuff.

Rock torments Regal with catchphrases, sidesteps a charging Shawn Stasiak to send him running into a metal door, and leaves to get ready.

Hardcore Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Jeff Hardy

Rob took the title from Jeff at InVasion but Jeff stole it back on Raw. This is the rematch with the belt hanging above the ring, meaning it’s time to climb some ladders. Van Dam takes him to the start in a wrestling sequence but Jeff spins out into a standoff. Rob scores some kicks but misses a dropkick to give Jeff a breather. Hardy is hipblocked to the apron but he hangs on and does the same thing to send Rob to the floor. A big springboard dive takes out both guys in the first high spot of the match.

Both guys head towards the ladders but Jeff sends Rob into the barricade but misses a dive off the top. Rob drops a leg on the back of Jeff’s head to put him on the floor before getting the ladder. Hardy pops up again and runs the barricade to take him down before the ladder is inside the ring. With the ladder halfway in, Van Dam gets up on the barricade and jumps onto the bottom end of the ladder to send the top into Jeff’s face. Back inside and Jeff dives over Rob to send the top end of the ladder into Rob’s face for good measure.

Jeff drops his legs on Rob’s which is usually a cover but here just hurts. Rob puts him in the Tree of Woe and hits some shoulders to the ribs to take over even more. The ladder is placed on the bottom rope in the corner and Van Dam hits Rolling Thunder out of the corner to crush Jeff against the metal. A slingshot legdrop crushes Jeff against the ladder again but Rob can’t follow up. Jeff gets up first and baseball slides the ladder into Rob’s ribs to send him rolling up the aisle.

Hardy is the first person to go up top but Van Dam runs back to the ring and hits a top rope kick to bring Jeff back down. The ladder is placed on top of Jeff again for Rolling Thunder but Jeff gets back up in time to dropkick the ladder out from under Rob. A DDT plants Van Dam but he rolls away from the Swanton. The Five Star misses as well and it’s time for the slow double climb. Hardy is higher up but Van Dam sends him face first into the top of the ladder and superplexes him off the top of the ladder.

They both go up again but this time it’s Jeff with a sunset bomb to put both guys down. Jeff goes up again and grabs the belt but loses the ladder underneath him. Rob grabs Jeff’s foot but lets go, sending Jeff swinging back and forth. Hardy finally falls onto Van Dam before setting up the ladder again, only to have Van Dam shove it over and send Jeff into the ropes. Van Dam finally climbs up and pulls down the title for the win.

Rating: B. To the shock of no one, this was a solid match. There are certain gimmicks that are tailor made for certain people and it’s ladder matches for these two. It was a good brawl and the fans were way into it as both guys were big fan favorites. It’s not as good as some ladder matches but it still worked very well.

Shane gives Booker bookends made of announce tables. Seriously.

We recap DDP/Kanyon vs. the Brothers of Destruction. DDP had been revealed as the stalker of Undertaker’s wife Sara which was so far removed from his character that it wasn’t even funny. Kanyon and Kane were brought in because a goofy career midcarder vs. Kane somehow evens out Page vs. Undertaker. Oh and they’re both tag champions to make this title for title. Kanyon is US Champion for no apparent reason.

WCW Tag Titles/WWF Tag Titles: Undertaker/Kane vs. Diamond Dallas Page/Kanyon

Inside a cage to make sure the jobbers have no chance at all. The WWF guys have the WCW titles and the WCW guys have the WWF titles because CRAZY! Undertaker’s wife Sara drops the key to the cage down her shirt for safekeeping. The monsters dominate to start, shocking no one at all. Taker pounds on Page and Kane destroys Kanyon until DDP actually gets in a low blow and sends Taker into the cage.

The guys trade off opponents and Kane kicks Page’s head off as Taker destroys Kanyon. Kane powerbombs Kanyon into the corner as Taker rams Page into the cage. A big boot sends DDP’s head into the steel but Kanyon comes out of the corner to take Taker down. He hits a kind of Fameasser out of the corner to take Kane down but the Brothers sit up at the same time. Page and Kanyon go up top but Taker kicks Page down and tells Kane to let Kanyon go. Now it’s the Brothers against Page, two on one.

They take turns with running clotheslines in the corner and Taker hits a sidewalk slam for two. Kane yells at the referee in the corner as Taker pounds Page down. There’s a chain in the ring from somewhere and Taker whips Page in the back for fun. Kane is just chilling in the corner watching this. Taker tells Page he can leave and live, but if he ever looks at Sara again he’s dead. DDP tries to leave but gets chokeslammed off the top a few seconds later. The Last Ride ends the slaughter and gives the Brothers both sets of titles.

Rating: D+. So you the dominant team of former world champions beat a guy who is nothing like the successful character he portrayed a few years ago and his midcard comedic lackey. Thankfully this was only ten minutes long and Sara didn’t look bad. This finally ended Page’s destruction by Taker and Kane once and for all I believe.

Rock is having his injured ribs checked, steps aside to let Stasiak charge past him again, and tells the doctor he’ll be WCW Champion.

We recap Austin vs. Angle. Austin jumped to the Alliance because Vince McMahon was giving Angle too many hugs. Seriously, that’s what caused his heel turn. Angle became the great hope for the WWF and ran through the Alliance to get to Austin, earning this shot.

WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. Kurt Angle

Angle jumps Austin in the aisle and the fight is on fast. This was an interesting characteristic for Austin: despite turning heel, he was still basically the same guy. He would fight anyone that challenged him and would go straight at them every time. That’s very rare to see in a turning wrestler, but Austin is a very rare kind of wrestler. The brawl stars in the aisle before they head into the ring for the bell.

The champion is in control in the corner but Angle clotheslines him down to take over. A cross body gets two for Kurt but Austin heads after the knee to get control. That involves going to the mat though and Angle picks the ankle for the ankle lock but Austin makes the rope. Steve sends Angle into the barricade to put Angle down again before suplexing him a few times back inside.

As he tries for his fourth suplex in a row though, Angle reverses into the Rolling German Suplexes to stagger the champion. Kurt hits a remarkable SEVEN straight suplexes to put Austin down, but the Angle Slam is escaped and Austin pokes Kurt in the eye. Austin nails a superplex and there’s a Stunner out of nowhere for two. A second Stunner hits but Angle falls out to the floor. Austin sends him into the post to bust the challenger open then does it again for good measure.

Back inside though, all of that beating just gets two. Since it didn’t work, Austin sends him to the post again to bust Angle open even more. Austin goes to drop Angle onto the announce table but Angle slides down his back and sends Steve over the barricade and into the crowd, only for Austin to grab Angle and suplex him onto the concrete. Back to ringside and Angle grabs the ankle lock but it doesn’t count out there. Kurt realizes this so he grabs Austin back into the ring to put the hold on again, only for Austin to grabs the rope.

Back to ringside again because we haven’t been there in awhile. Angle hits a release belly to belly suplex followed by a belly to back. We head back in and Angle actually hits his moonsault for a VERY close two. Austin grabs a Million Dollar Dream, his old finishing move, but Angle climbs the ropes ala Bret Hart at Survivor Series 1996 and Rock at Wrestlemania X7. However this time Austin kicks out but also hangs onto the hold as the psychology of that spot gets even deeper.

Angle finally makes a rope but he’s spent. There’s the third Stunner but SOMEHOW Angle kicks out again. Steve slaps him in the face which only fires Angle up enough for a quick Angle Slam for a very delayed two count. Austin has had enough of this and punches the referee but walks into a DDT from Kurt for no count. Here’s a second referee to count two, only to get a Stunner for his efforts. A third referee comes out and gets decked but Angle hits another Angle Slam. A WCW referee comes out and ends the match with a DQ, keeping the title on Austin and in the Alliance.

Rating: A-. This was a great war with both guys leaving it all in the ring. The match also made Angle look all the greater because Austin couldn’t beat him and had to get himself disqualified. This gave the WWF the hero that it was needing, which is the whole point of this match. Angle would get another chance in the future though, and all it took was kidnapping Austin, threatening to throw him off a bridge in Toronto and throwing him in a kid’s pool.

Angle destroys the WCW referees post match.

JR goes into full I CAN’T SHOT SHOUTING AND SHAKING MY HEAD mode about how Austin can’t beat Angle.

We recap Rock vs. Booker T. Rock came back from making Scorpion King and affirmed his loyalty to the WWF by laying out Shane. Booker is his first opponent because…..well how else are you going to have Austin and Rock as world champions at the same time?

WCW World Title: Booker T. vs. The Rock

Rock has bad ribs coming in due to a Bookend (Rock Bottom) through a table. Rock fires off right hands to start but has to chase Shane around the ring. Booker jumps him coming back in but gets sent into Shane, setting up a Samoan drop for two. Things settle down a bit and Rock clotheslines Booker down before hooking a side roll for two. Rock wins a slugout and sends Booker out to the floor.

They head over to the announce table and Rock gets in a blatant low blow. Now it’s into the crowd with Booker sending Rock’s ribs into the barricade to take over. Back to ringside and Booker loads up the announce table but Rock comes back with right hands. Booker easily reverses a whip into the post and Shane takes off the turnbuckle pad. Back in (finally) and an elbow to the face gets two for the champion.

A knee drop to the face has Rock in trouble and Heyman wants a Spinarooni. JR: “It sounds like something from Chef Boy-Ardee.” We hit the chinlock for a bit before Rock comes back and hooks a Sharpshooter. Shane is pulled in again but Booker gets in a cheap shot for two. A slingshot into the exposed buckle has Booker in trouble and Rock gets two off a DDT. Shane puts a chair in the ring and picks up the WCW Title. The referee goes to get rid of the chair and Shane lays out Rock with the belt. This brings out the APA to lay out the Boy Wonder.

Both guys in the ring are down and Shane is knocked silly. His eyes rolled back in his head while laid out is a great visual. The Bookend lays out Rock but the referee is with Shane so the delayed cover only gets two. Rock’s clothesline and the belly to belly get two and there’s the People’s Elbow but Shane comes back in for the save. Shane gets a Rock Bottom on the floor (eyes open again) and Rock hits the spit punch on Booker, only to walk into a spinebuster. The ax kick sets up the Spinarooni but the Rock Bottom connects for the pin and the title for Rock.

Rating: B. The match is good but I doubt even Booker’s mama gave him a chance in this match. Overbooking the match helped and Booker didn’t look like a jobber or anything but at the end of the day it was fifteen minutes of killing time until the obvious ending. Still though, good match that got stuck being on after a classic.

Rock celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. For a period as bad as the Invasion, this was an excellent show. The world title matches were very good, the ladder match was better than I expected and there was some other nice stuff sprinkled in. Nothing on here is really bad at all and the crowd was hot all night. Good show here and worth seeing if you want a good way to kill three hours.

Ratings Comparison

Edge vs. Lance Storm

Original: B

Redo: B-

APA/Spike Dudley vs. Test/Dudley Boys

Original: C

Redo: D+

Tajiri vs. X-Pac

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Rhyno vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Rob Van Dam vs. Jeff Hardy

Original: B-

Redo: B

Diamond Dallas Page/Kanyon vs. Undertaker/Kane

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Steve Austin vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A-

Redo: A-

The Rock vs. Booker T

Original: B+

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B+

Redo: A-

About the same all around.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/04/history-of-summerslam-count-up-summerslam-2001-summerslam-gets-all-alliancey/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Summerslam 2001
Date: August 19, 2001
Location: Compaq Center, San Jose, California
Attendance: 15,293
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

Ok, I know I usually say little is different, but in this case, just about everything is different. WCW in its original form is dead, having been bought by Vince for an insane two million dollars just 5 months prior to this. The Invasion is going on at the moment as WWF is battling the ECW/WCW Alliance. Tonight we have a double main event of Steve Austin vs. Angle for the WWF Title and Booker T vs. Rock for the WCW Title.

Either way, this show is just a complete 180 from last year. Also HHH is injured having torn his quad about 3 months ago. The roster has been more or less put on steroids now with guys like RVD, Booker T, DDP, Rhyno, Tajiri and Lance Storm here now. Oh and Lawler quit over his witch of a wife being fired.

Finally, Austin is top heel now, having left WWF for the Alliance, saying that he’ll have better competition now, which is completely stupid as he’s fighting the same guys he was fighting before the Invasion, but who am I to critique the genius of Vince McMahon and his Invasion storyline?

The angle could have been far better, but there’s been laundry lists of reasons given about why it didn’t work, with the big one being that they didn’t wait long enough, but I’ll drop that before I go into a page and a half long rant. Let’s get started.

WOW. This video package to open the show is AWESOME. It’s set to Drowning Pool’s Bodies, which is still the best live performance of a song that I’ve ever heard. This looks like the opening to a TV show or something and is just well done all around. It looks awesome and is one of the best video openings I’ve ever seen. Actually, here it is.

Intercontinental Title: Lance Storm vs. Edge

A lot of the stories tonight are going to consist of this: WWF vs. Alliance, and that’s what this would be classified as. Storm was the midcard Alliance guy so they gave him the IC belt to help even out the title scene. Edge gets a huge pop. This should be good. Edge was at an odd stage in his career at this point, where he and Christian were way too big of a deal to be a tag team anymore and Edge was clearly on the verge of being a breakout star.

He won the KOTR this year with he and Christian feuded over the KOTR Cup and yes I said Cup. This is very solid for the first five minutes or so with Edge having a completely different style around this time. He would get hurt in I think 2003 just as he was on the verge of the main event push and be out for over a year. His style back then was much more well rounded with more high flying but everything else just about the same as it is now.

Lance Storm has a very odd stomp, as he kicks his left foot forward and then stomps with the right boot. He must be doing something right though as he’s the only wrestler ever, and I do mean only one ever, that could make a half Boston Crab seem like a deadly submission move. We cut back to the WWF locker room to see everyone crowded around a monitor watching the match.

That’s something that could have worked well in the NWO angle, which is what this is a redoing of, and while it’s not as good, I don’t think it’s as bad as everyone says it was. Heyman’s commentary is great as he can play the cocky heel as well as anyone ever on the headset could. Edge starts his comeback as we get a gem of a line by JR: “Powerbomb by Edge. It was a powerbomb.” The more I listen to him, the more I shake my head.

Anyway, they both almost get their finishers but they can’t quite get there. For no apparent reason, Christian comes out and tries to spear Storm but misses and hits Edge which gets two. We get a nice sequence of holds and counters but Edge catches Storm in the inverted DDT which he needs to go back to for the pin and the title. Christian hands him the belt and leaves in a weird moment.

Rating: B. Another solid Summerslam opener here as they were going fast paced and slow paced in a perfect balance. Both guys were working hard and it was a solid pairing that gives you a nice title change that was more or less clean. Good way to get the show going.

Test and the Dudleys are heading to the ring but are cut off by Michael Cole, somehow looking less heterosexual than he does now. Test has left the WWF because he’s tired of being upstaged. The Dudleys left because they’re tired of Spike and his girlfriend Molly getting the glory, so we get a six man out of it.

Jericho says that he’ll beat Rhyno tonight. He also gets some funny jokes in about Stephanie being rather friendly with the men and her plastic surgery.

Spike Dudley/APA vs. Test/Dudley Boys

Molly with the blonde hair and in the blue top is beyond pretty. Just absolutely gorgeous. Test cost the APA the tag titles, leading to this match. The white shirts on the WCW referees just look stupid. They start off with the faces beating the heels up and then Spike comes in. Now Spike reminds me of X-Pac. He tries so hard but his size is just too much to overcome.

Why should I believe that a guy that I outweigh by nearly a hundred pounds can beat up someone that outweighs me by 100lbs? Simply put, I don’t and I never have. He was fine as a cruiserweight guy, but he had no business being in there with big men. I get that it was his gimmick, but I couldn’t stand it. We’ve got tables less than 5 minutes into the match so at least we’re not waiting that long for them this time.

The Dudleys do a double flapjack and they throw him so high up they nearly lose their grip on him. That’s just downright impressive. This is actually a very fast match as the faces take over again for just a bit, until Spike is launched over the top and through a table. Bradshaw nails Test with a Clothesline, but Shane comes in and blasts him with a chair for the pin. Paul’s line of D-Von, get the ambulance makes me laugh.

Rating: C. It was just a short 6 man without much going on. We do need filler though and that’s what this match was. It was a seven minute match and a ten minute segment in total that was just fine. It’s not bad, it’s not great but I’d call it perfectly acceptable.

In the back, the WWF guys are upset over losing the match but they’re all congratulating Edge over winning the IC Title. Christian comes up and announces that he’s gotten a European Title shot tomorrow night on Raw. No one cares, as their Grandma calls. She talks to Edge and hangs up on Christian which gets a solid laugh.

Shawn Stasiak comes into Debra/Stone Cold’s locker room which ticks off Debra. At the time he was just an idiot character that was trying to impress Austin. He says something about his tights but Debra says if he wants to make an impression to go beat someone up.

Title For Title: Tajiri vs. X-Pac

It’s the light heavyweight championship vs. the cruiserweight championship here in a unification match. Actually, upon further review it’s not, and it’s just to hold both belts. Later on they would be split again until there was suppose to be a unification match at Survivor Series. X-Pac was injured so they just dropped the Light Heavyweight Title and replaced it with the WWF Cruiserweight Title. Uh, I guess that makes sense.

Anyway, let’s get to this. X-Pac at the time was the leader of perhaps the most useless group of all time: X-Factor. It was him, Justin Credible and Albert. They did nothing, they had no feuds, they accomplished nothing. Like I said, they were the most useless stable of all time. Oh yeah Pac is wearing just tights now instead of his singlet. Ross talks about how this is the last Direct TV broadcast of a PPV, as no one really cares.

The surfboard is just absolutely painful looking. See, this is how Pac should have been used the entire time. He simply had no business fighting guys twice his size, just like Spike in the previous match. It makes sense and works much better when he’s fighting guys like these. Oh apparently neither guy is in the Alliance, so this is the one real WWF match all night. Oh what a treat for us.

Both guys have educated feet I guess. This has been almost all X-Pac, and since this is one of my reviews and my timing is worse than a broken Boogeyman clock, Tajiri makes his comeback at that very second. Ok, so maybe this is for a unified title. They’re not very clear about it, but based on what the announcers say it’s for a unified title, yet based on what actually happened, it wasn’t unified until about three months later.

The company continues to amaze me with its complete lack of sense. Anyway, they botch the handspring elbow as X-Pac dives onto his stomach like it’s just a simple hitting of the ropes. Albert comes out and gets on the apron, causing the mist to be blown. A low blow and an X-Factor come as the referee is getting rid of Albert to end this.

Rating: C+. Short and sweet here, but overall it wasn’t bad. They were wrestling people that it made sense for them to wrestle and title for title matches are always cool no matter who is in them. Pac would be hurt soon enough and he would be the guy that had to drop out of the Survivor Series match after Tajiri got the Cruiserweight Title. It made no sense, so go figure.

We go to WWF New York and see Perry Saturn as he searches for Moppy. If you don’t know about this story, do yourself a favor and go look it up. It was one of the dumbest and best angles I’ve ever seen.

Stephanie is with Rhyno and says she picked him to beat Jericho because he’s never beaten Rhyno in the ring. Now table tennis, Parcheesi and Chinese Checkers, those are all different stories.

We get a recap of the feud, which was highlighted by Rhyno goring Jericho through the Smackdown set. Now, after that, he suggests a match with Jericho at Summerslam, which makes sense as he’s already gotten the last laugh, so we have to give the face another chance to get even right?

Chris Jericho vs. Rhyno

The editing is odd here as you get the Jericho interview from earlier in the show here. Not sure why they would do them twice like that. Stephanie looks AWESOME in a black leather dress. Her hair being braded/curled isn’t working so well though. Heyman hates Jericho apparently which is ironic I’d think.

They slug it out to start and Jericho is out of his league here. Top rope elbow to a standing Rhyno which is a move I’ve always liked doesn’t do much. Walls are avoided as Jericho has shifted it to wrestling and has taken over. Jericho gets that springboard dropkick while Rhyno is on the apron. Stephanie distracts Jericho to allow Rhyno to catch him with a Gore as Jericho dives at him to the floor and both guys are down, drawing a holy crap chant.

BIG old slap to Jericho by Stephanie which Ross calls a right hand. That’s true but it’s a bit misleading in wrestling commentary. Body scissors by Rhyno which is one of his signature moves I think. I watched a match of his last night and one today and I think he used it in both. He throws in a freaking airplane spin for two. Can’t say he’s typical.

Rhyno goes up for a splash which Jericho moved out of the way from but Rhyno would have missed even if Jericho hadn’t moved at all. Jericho messes up a springboard but gets something out of it anyway for two. Middle rope dropkick gets a cover but Stephanie literally hugs the referee to stop the cover. Jericho kisses her and then hits the Lionsault for a long two.

Spinebuster by Rhyno sets up the Walls for him and they’re better than the ones Jericho tends to use. Gore misses and the proper version of the Walls, as in the Liontamer, gets the tap.

Rating: B-. Solid stuff here as Rhyno was still worth anything at this point. Jericho of course was great as he was on the verge of going into the main event as a heel which worked out pretty well for him I’d think. This was a lot better than anyone expected I think and it was a solid 12 minute match.

Rock is walking in the back and is stopped by Regal. After a fairly boring promo, Stasiak runs at Rock who casually steps aside, causing Shawn to slam into a wall. Rock completes his promo and leaves.

Hardcore Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Jeff Hardy

This is a ladder match. It occurs to me, Hardy has had a more successful career than Van Dam, and it’s almost not even close. Imagine telling someone that back in 2001. They would have thought you were completely insane. At best for Van Dam, career wise they’re about even. Van Dam was a very interesting case. He was clearly the most popular ECW guy and WWF let him be. Yes he was on the heel team, but they didn’t make him evil.

Van Dam’s character isn’t someone menacing or threatening an they didn’t try to make him one. That’s why he was able to come out of it as a solid face: he always was one. Since I didn’t like the way I reviewed the TLC match at yesterday’s show, I’ll spare you the big long list of sick spots here and try to do more general stuff. For one thing, in this match there’s far less of a plan I think.

I’d guess that in the back, they just told these two to go put on a spot fest and that’s what happened. They go move for move with each other for about 15 minutes and it’s quite entertaining. Both guys can use the ladder very well indees, as they jump all over the place and try to one up each other with their big time moves. During the match, Heyman lists off the attributes of Sabu, yet doesn’t say his name. That just struck me as odd.

Were they not allowed to say it for some reason? I can’t imagine it was a copyright issue or something like that. Also, he’s credited as Van Dam’s mentor. I never really thought of him like that. Near the end they do the big hanging spot with Hardy holding onto the belt, which always seemed a bit stupid to me.

He really can’t unhook the belt with one hand? I find that a bit hard to believe. Anyway the ending is Van Dam just shoves the ladder down with Jeff on it and climbs up to get the belt in a rather anti-climactic ending.

Rating: B-. It was fun, but it wasn’t great. The problem with matches like these is that a lot of the spots have just been done before. We’ve seen all of these moves and while they’re cool, they’re not original anymore. Yeah the match was fun and cool, but it wasn’t great like a lot of them were. It’s still quite good though.

In the back, Booker is warming up for his match as Shane comes in with a present. He gives him book ends (like the Rock Bottom rip off of a finisher that he uses) made from the announce table that he put Rock through last week. That’s actually kind of clever.

We get a recap of the Brothers of Destruction vs. DDP/Kanyon. To me, this was an AWESOME story. Basically, we had seen Taker’s wife Sara (who was very hot, way hotter than McCool) being stalked by a guy that we never saw. He’d have tapes of himself inside their house, of her coming out of the pool, of her in the shower, in their bedroom, etc. The key thing was, you didn’t know who was filming them.

Now I’ve heard a lot of varying rumors as to who he was originally supposed to be revealed as, with the most prominent being Kane. However, it turned out to be DDP. The problem was they kind of discontinued the Sara aspect as DDP just kept getting beat up. Eventually Kanyon came in and Kane backed up Taker. They both won tag titles, so we have another kind of unification match here inside of a cage. In other words, it’s a way for Taker and Kane to kill them both at once.

WWF/WCW Tag Titles: DDP/Kanyon vs. Brothers of Destruction

Oh yeah Kanyon is the US Champion at the same time, so we have five belts in one match. Now aren’t you glad they unified some of them? I have to give them this: the WCW Tag Title belts just look awesome. They run down Taker’s history in cage matches, which is pretty extensive. I actually like the idea of pins and submissions counting here. Taker is a guy that needs to just win with a big knockout move.

Just after Taker and Kane get in, Taker grabs the door and slams it shut in a very cool looking thing. Immediately your heels try to go over the top in separate corners. If I were Taker and Kane, I would have let Kanyon leave. It gives you a handicap against DDP, who is the real hated one. Imagine what you could combine to do to him in that situation. Let the slaughtering begin. The heels actually take over for about 45 seconds which surprises me, but of course it doesn’t last long at all.

This is more or less a tag team beatdown. There is a cool moment though once the heels take over again as they’re both leaving over the top of the cage. The Brothers are down and at the same time they sit up. They follow my advice and let Kanyon leave without any problem, only to beat the living heck out of DDP. For a lot of this beating, Kane is just sitting on the top rope and watching.

Taker yells at Page that he can leave and he’ll let him live, but if he ever looks at Sara again he’ll kill him. Page tries to leave but Taker of course stops him and chokeslams him, before the Last Ride ends this. Dang, Sara is rather hot. Also, the unification lasted less than a month as both belts were individually defended next month.

Rating: C+. This was nothing but a double beating and that’s just fine. No one believed the heels had a chance so the match was booked correctly by not giving them a chance. They were completely destroyed and that’s how it should have been. Page of course turned face soon after this, becoming the motivational tooth guy (look it up).

Rock is with the doctor in the back and cuts a promo on the doctor as Stasiak runs at him again, and the same thing happens but this time the camera doesn’t even follow him. He just goes flying over the table as Rock steps back.

We get the recap of Austin vs. Angle. This was actually an epic match, as the buildup was great. They more or less made Angle into a monster leading up to this, having him beat every big name in the Alliance before finally challenging Austin. Austin had turned on the WWF at InVasion back in I think July, nailing Angle with a chair to give the heels the victory and join them in the process.

In the buildup, Angle had just beaten Austin down at every single turn and it looked like this one was going to be domination. To their credit though, the bookers never made Austin look weak. He was the same Austin that had dominated through the late 90s, but they simply made Angle look better. That’s hard to do but it works very well, as it saves Austin’s credibility as well as makes Angle look better.

WWF Title: Kurt Angle vs. Steve Austin

They meet in the aisle as Austin isn’t afraid of Kurt, which I think helps his character a lot. If Austin had just become this little coward, then no one would have bought him as the leader of the heel faction. By keeping him as the tough guy that he always had been, they make the Alliance look that much stronger. For the most part all we have in the first 2 minutes is nothing but punches.

I get why that’s how most big matches start but not two minutes worth. Austin works on the leg which isn’t as odd as you’d think but Angle gets a sweet counter into the ankle lock. The announcers more or less ruin it as they make it clear through their voices that this isn’t it. When I say announcers I mean JR. It’s weird to see Austin being in control for the majority of a match like this. These two are suplexing the heck out of each other, which is just freaking cool.

It’s not often that you see Austin using offense like this but it’s certainly both looking good and working. Angle hits seven or eight in a row, which somehow isn’t the most Austin has ever taken in a row as Benoit once hit I think 13 in a row. That’s just not only sick but impressive that Benoit could keep getting him up as well as he did. Since it’s pro wrestling though, Austin is just fine after a few seconds of resting following that many suplexes.

From out of nowhere, Austin gets a Stunner after about 8 minutes. The crowd has no idea what to think as Austin got it and got it clean. Angle of course kicks out and the second Stunner sends him to the floor. I don’t get why the announcers are so surprised that Angle kicked out. Rock kicked out after about 3 of them at Mania and after about a 20 minute match. Anyway, Austin goes to the floor and just beats the tar out of Angle.

He nearly breaks his leg and it’s Austin doing what he does best. This would have been a standard Austin match in the late 90s actually. See how well this was done? They’ve just turned his allegiance around and now Austin is still what he was before but just working for a different side. They go out into the crowd where Austin hits a suplex over the barrier but doesn’t go down with Angle. Apparently this was the best move ever, despite it being little more than a slam.

Angle counters though and gets the ankle lock on the floor with a downright scary look on his face. He gets it again in the middle of the ring, but he’s in the ropes in all of 4 seconds. Angle is bleeding bad here, like almost Austin at Mania 13 bad. Ok on second look it’s not that bad. Hey, did you know that Angle won an gold medal with a broken neck? Now sure if you’d ever heard something like that.

More suplexes follow as I’m gaining a new appreciation for those things. Angle busts out the moonsault and hits it like Curt Hennig would. Angle is going commando on Austin…whatever that means, but Austin breaks out the cobra clutch, which despite using it at Mania where Ross says that he hasn’t used is since he was the Ringmaster, Austin uses it here for the first time since he was the Ringmaster.

As Angle does the 80s style arm stays up on the third drop, his head is just looking awful. A third Stunner after all that only gets two as the fans are WAY into this. Angle Slam is the counter to the kick, as I continue to try to figure out how the Angle Slam is any different from a belly to back suplex that’s rotated just a bit. Austin hits the referee though after it gets a two as JR is of course, say it with me, FREAKING OUT.

Did you know that JR thought he knew that man? Did you know that? Not sure if you had heard that one or not. Austin low blows Angle and then stuns the other referee as JR is quoting the 25th letter of the alphabet. A THIRD referee comes out and Austin hits him with the belt. Angle hits the slam but JR is SHOCKED that the referee that got hit maybe 4 seconds ago is down. After all that, we get to the odd part of the match.

Nick Patrick, an Alliance referee, runs out, counts ONE time, and then slides out and tells Fink that it’s a DQ. Why in the world would you count a one and then go for the DQ? I thought he was pulling up because he was going to say his shoulder hurt or something like that, but just to count one and then the DQ? What kind of sense does that even begin to not make?

Naturally, Angle goes off on Patrick with the ankle lock, and I have two observations. One: Patrick taps. Why? Does he think that it’s a match and that’s going to make Angle let go or something? Two: Ross, as usual, says that he’s tapping like a drunk man. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? I’ve been around people when they’re drunk and not once have they tapped. The line makes no sense at all and yet somehow the fans have accepted it.

After the match, Ross goes insane again and just babbles on forever about how he knows Austin can’t beat Angle. I know I make fun of Ross a lot, but this was beyond bad looking. This was bordering on embarrassing. Either way, Austin would lose clean to Angle next month after some of the best promos that I can remember, easily the best Angle has ever done.

Rating: A-. This was an awesome match. Austin went suplex for suplex with Angle and they had huge drama going on near the end. Angle took a freaking beating but kept going. I’m not an Angle fan, but there are times when he gets into that zone of his that he is just flat out mesmerizing. This was one of those nights for him.

We recap Rock vs. Booker as it’s just pathetic to really see how much WCW was just stealing from the WWF at the end. There’s imitating and then there’s just flat out ripping off. WCW was doing that later. It was really just bad, and Booker was the worst of them all.

WCW Title: Rock vs. Booker T

Yes, the main event of Summerslam is for the WCW Title. Think of someone that’s very over. Rock is more over. Ross says that the people at home are on their feet. Has anyone ever jumped up for an entrance? Not that I can think of. This is Rock’s first PPV match since Mania as he left to film Scorpion King. Therefore, if you can’t guess the ending of this show, you’re an idiot.

It’s mainly a brawl to start as neither guy has a real advantage for that long. I like matches like that. It makes you think that anything can happen and it can give you a possible hint of what I say makes a match great: not knowing who is going to win. There’s little fun in a squash match, as it’s obvious who is going to win. A good match is typically one where you’re unsure who will win. Now there are obvious exceptions, but for the most part you’ll find that the lack of a clear winner is the better case.

Oh yeah Shane is outside helping Booker about every 8 seconds as can be expected. However, the APA run out and take him out with a sick clothesline by the future waste of air Bradshaw. There’s really not much to say about the match as it’s pretty standard for the most part. Booker is down after an elbow drop but Shane has to make the save since Booker fell asleep waiting on Rock to finish with all of the theatrics, earning Shane another beating.

This is a pretty solid match here though as it’s back and forth with Booker of course being in control most of the match. They fight even more but Booker spins up as Mark Madden continues to validate his existence. If you don’t believe he has a reason to exist, read his column.

I’m sure you’ll be amazed by all the things that he takes credit for, but he’d hate this show. Page had a role in it. What’s his deal with Page anyway? Whatever, it’s not like I’d be able to listen to his explanation. Anyway, as Booker spins up, Rock nips up and lands the Rock Bottom (NOT URANAGE BLAST IT!) for the pin, the title, and Heyman’s heart attack. He poses with the belt to end the show.

Rating: B+. This was a fun match and was great to send the folks home happy. Booker wasn’t going to win and everyone knew it, but they did the best they could with it and it turned out pretty well. It was Rock’s big return and it put the spotlight on him very well. It was definitely good but not great.

Overall Rating: B+. Would have been better to have Austin/Angle go on last, but this certainly worked very well. Either way, we have a good show here with a solid balance of gimmick and regular matches and a fun match to end the show. Austin and Angle is an underrated match, but their match next month was better.

However, I think this show is lacking the one huge match that steals the show which is keeping it from being an all time classic. Definitely recommended though as this is a very good, but not great, show.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: June 14, 2019
Location: Melrose Ballroom, New York City, New York
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

We’re out of Philadelphia and hopefully that means we’re on the way towards more of a focus on the good stuff rather than the bad. Part of the company’s issues have been going hot and cold with a mixture of stuff that works for the future and an emphasis on nostalgia. The good has been very strong though and if we get more of that, we’re in for a fun show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

The North vs. Rob Van Dam/Sabu

Sabu and Van Dam have Super Genie with them. The announcers go into Van Dam’s ECW stories, because he’s done NOTHING since then. Certainly not been Impact World Champion or anything. Thankfully those stories stop so they can mention that this is a #1 contenders match with the winners getting a Tag Team Title shot at Slammiversary.

Sabu takes Alexander down by the leg to start and it’s off to Van Dam for a suplex. Alexander takes him into the corner and brings in Page, who gets kicked in the face for his efforts. The armdrag into the armbar lets us take a look at Van Dam, who looks very old. There’s the Rolling Thunder/facebuster combination for two on Page and it’s more kicks to Page’s face. A kick to Sabu’s face lets the North start in with some backbreakers and it’s Van Dam in trouble for a change.

The Canadians get him down in the corner for some stomping until Page charges into a kick to the face. That’s enough for the tag to Sabu so Genie throws in a chair, which is pelted at the North a few times. The camel clutch/dropkick to the face combination keeps Alexander down and it’s time for a table. Sabu and Van Dam go up but here’s Moose to shove Van Dam off the top. The Arabian facebuster drives Alexander through the table for no count so Sabu hits a tornado DDT to send Page into the broken table. A Moose distraction lets the North hit a double Neutralizer to finish Sabu at 10:38.

Rating: D+. Well at least the right team won, and it only took interference and the disregard for various usage of weapons. The North isn’t an interesting team and at least they got in a win over a “legendary” team. Oh and Van Dam, the one of the ECW guys with any value, didn’t take the fall so he can put Moose over at Slammiversary as he should.

Post match here’s Tommy Dreamer to send Moose inside but Moose bails from the threat of a Van Terminator.

Post break Moose yells at the North, who call Moose out for bailing on them. Their partnership seems to be done so Moose promises to take out the ECW era. My head hurts again.

Announcers’ preview.

Havok vs. Masha Slamovich

Masha forearms away to start and gets knocked down with a single shot to the chest. Havok bends her over the knee but misses a charge in the corner. A dropkick and right hands don’t get Masha anywhere and it’s a sitout slam to plant Masha. The chokeslam and Tombstone finish Marsha at 3:39.

Rating: D. Total and complete squash here, which is exactly what it should have been. Havok is a good monster and can make a suitable opponent for Rosemary at some point. It’s also nice of them to bring up Havok’s history around here without mentioning her getting beaten up by Awesome Kong and ruining her mystique. That’s how you bring a monster back and it’s working here.

Post match James Mitchell tells Rosemary to work on her anger management. He’s tried to be diplomatic with her over Su Yung but now he’s had to go a little more serious, which is why Havok is here. Havok is his Godzilla stomping on Tokyo and now she’s coming for the Knockouts Title. She’ll use Rosemary’s broken carcass as a launchpad. That’s quite the image.

Raj Singh vs. Cody Deaner

Yes this feud needs to continue. Raj knocks him into the corner to start so Cody comes back out with a running clothesline. Cody sends him outside for a suicide dive but gets caught with a hanging cutter on the way back in. Raj’s running dropkick to the back gets two and he slaps away a lot. That wakes Deaner up and the snap jabs put Raj down. A hard DDT plants Raj but Gama Singh gets on the apron for a distraction. Cousin Jake cuts off an interfering Rohit Raju….and Gama has a heart attack. That allows Raj to hit an arm trap faceplant for the pin at 5:08.

Rating: D. I really don’t see the need for three interferences and a fake heart attack for half of the Desi Hit Squad vs. half of the country cousins. This felt completely minor league and like something you would see on a company trying to put on its first show. They’re not exactly cranking out good tag teams at the moment and this didn’t help things.

Michael Elgin is ready to beat up Willie Mack tonight. Johnny Impact comes in and says he’s been talking to the hospital. They haven’t seen Mack, even though Elgin promised to send him there. Elgin says stay out of the main event.

Rosemary thinks Mitchell has a thing for monsters. The Hive has sent her on a mission to get the Knockouts Title back so Havok is just an obstacle in the way.

Partial Slammiversary rundown.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Samoa Joe vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Slammiversary XII.

Sami Callihan comes into the women’s locker room (good thing there was a camera waiting in there) and gets in an argument with Tessa Blanchard. A match against Jake Crist is set for next week.

Jordynne Grace vs. Madison Rayne

Kiera Hogan is out for commentary. They fight over arm control to start and we cut over to Kiera, who is in fact talking. Rayne gets a quick rollup for two and Grace grinds away on a headlock. Grace ducks a charge in the corner and sends Madison to the apron, where she seems to slip off and fall out to the floor. Madison is fine enough and gets suplexed for two back inside. A standing Koji Clutch doesn’t get Rayne very far as Madison takes her down and pulls on the arm instead.

They trade pinfall attempts for two each until Madison hits a basement dropkick for a breather. Madison takes her to the floor for a cutter and they’re both down with Madison holding her back. Back in and Madison’s crucifix bomb gets two, followed by Grace’s spinning Muscle Buster for the same. Grace goes up but a Kiera distraction lets Madison pull her down for CrossRayne and the pin at 10:28.

Rating: C. Match of the night so far, though Kiera isn’t exactly interesting here. Grace feels like a monster and while losing to Rayne isn’t the biggest problem in the world, it’s not the way I would have gone. The good thing here is we currently have three stories going on in the Knockouts division, which is way, way better than just having the champion vs. her challenger of the week. I’m rather impressed by that and while it’s not working as well, they’re trying something similar with the tag division. I can appreciate the effort if nothing else.

Video on Killer Kross breaking Kenny and Eddie Edwards being given a new kendo stick by Sandman.

Killer Kross vs. Sandman

Sandman seems to be taking Eddie’s place and staggers around before hitting some left hands. A kendo stick to the ribs has little effect and the Krossjacket choke ends Sandman at 1:36. As annoying as I find it to have the ECW guys around, I can’t get annoyed at Sandman getting choked out in a minute and a half.

Post match Kross won’t let go so Eddie comes in for the save.

LAX doesn’t think much of the Rascalz but Konnan wants them to take things more seriously. The Rascalz come in and want a rematch but LAX doesn’t like them barging in. The fight is on with LAX getting the better of it (and stomping on a downed camera) and agreeing to the rematch. Someone who looks like Laredo Kid comes in and takes something from the Rascalz.

It’s time for the Smoke Show with Taya Valkyrie and John E. Bravo as guests. Fallah Bahh and Scarlett Bordeaux share a drink but Taya isn’t interested. She also doesn’t like Scarlett talking about Johnny Impact. Scarlett brings up Taya having to defend the title next week and says she knows who the opponent will be. Taya says spit it out, which Scarlett must know how to do. It’s Su Yung so Taya freaks out and leaves.

Here’s the rest of the Slammiversary rundown.

Willie Mack vs. Michael Elgin

Rich Swann is in Mack’s corner. They slug it out to start and trade shoulders with Mack actually getting the better of it off a jumping version. A jumping enziguri sets up an exploder suplex to send Elgin to the apron. Mack joins him for a slugout with Elgin getting the better of it and hitting a superkick to the floor.

Back from a break with Mack hitting a spinwheel kick and dropping a leg for two. A sitout spinebuster gets the same but the Stunner is broken up. Elgin’s superkick drops Mack and a top rope superplex gets two. Mack avoids a charge into the corner and gets caught with a slingshot Fameasser to send him outside. Instead of going back in, Elgin drops Swann onto the apron. Back in and a buckle bomb sets up the Elgin Bomb for the pin at 10:10.

Rating: C+. This was another good match between any combination of these three and Impact, which makes for some nice main events. Elgin is a great monster and someone can slay him, though I’m not sure if it’s going to be Cage at Slammiversary. That makes for an interesting match and I’m curious to see how it goes.

Post match Elgin goes after him again but Swann makes the save. Johnny Impact runs in to take Swann down but Elgin suplexes Impact. He even puts on the sunglasses to really rub it in. Another powerbomb into the post leaves Impact laying to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I don’t remember the last time I’ve seen such an up and down show as this one. The tag division (outside of the title picture) is a mess, the Knockouts division is rather interesting, the main event is good stuff and the ECW guys are just there. If they can get this stuff together and do more of the right stuff instead of the wrong, they’ll have a hit on their hands. And if they can get Pursuit to not screw things up, it can be even better.

Results

The North b. Rob Van Dam/Sabu – Double Neutralizer to Sabu

Jessika Havok b. Masha Slamovich – Tombstone

Raj Singh b. Cody Deaner – Arm trap faceplant

Madison Rayne b. Jordynne Grace – Cross Rayne

Killer Kross b. Sandman – Krossjacket choke

Michael Elgin b. Willie Mack – Elgin Bomb

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: January 13, 2005
Location: St. Pete Times Forum, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

The road to the Royal Rumble and John Cena’s obvious coronation continues and this time around he has to beat up Kenzo Suzuki again. Other than that, we have to build towards JBL defending against both Kurt Angle and Big Show in a match that doesn’t sound too great on paper. They’ve surprised me before though so maybe that’s the case again here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of last week’s issues with Amy Weber, Kurt Angle, Joy Giovanni and Big Show where shenanigans ensued thanks to Weber outsmarting everyone else involved.

Angle tries to apologize for walking in on Joy in the shower last week but can’t get around Big Show. He finally steps aside so Angle can apologize and she says thank you. Show doesn’t like Angle but that took guts. Now they need to make JBL apologize.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: Rey Mysterio/Rob Van Dam vs. Basham Brothers vs. Luther Reigns/Mark Jindrak vs. Eddie Guerrero/Booker T.

Van Dam and Mysterio are defending and this is under elimination rules. Ignore Van Dam having a full leg cast on his left leg and his inability to walk with any kind of speed. Thanks to a pre-show coin toss, Eddie and Jindrak start things off. That means some Jindrak hip swiveling but the fans are behind Eddie anyway. Eddie has to counter a headlock with a top wristlock but Jindrak pretty easily powers him right back into it.

In a smart move, Eddie gets Jindrak over to Booker so the double teaming can begin. The hook kick to the face puts Jindrak out as Cole has an actual good idea: why not tag in the injured Van Dam and get an easier elimination? I knew if I listened to him talk for twenty years he’d say something smart eventually. Eddie dropkicks Jindrak down again and tags Doug in for a change of pace. Both teams come in for a brawl but Mysterio trips Doug and hits a 619 on Jindrak.

Eddie puts Doug on top and we’re down to three. Back from a break with Mysterio armdragging Doug down but Eddie gets tagged in to face Rey. Eddie is hesitant here so Rey tries a flying mare, only to slip off (though replays showed that it might have been Eddie pushing him off but not shoving him far enough) and nearly land on his head. Thankfully Eddie turns it into something like a powerslam to keep Rey from a bad case of paralysis. It’s back to Booker for a spinebuster and Eddie chokes with the tag rope in the corner.

Rey monkey flips Eddie down though and hits a springboard hurricanrana for the pin and the elimination. Eddie is very, very frustrated as they leave so Doug gets in a cheap shot on Mysterio to take over. Van Dam gets knocked off the apron so it’s Rey getting choked in the corner. A steps shot to the knee has Van Dam writhing in pain on the floor but Rey avoids a charge to send Doug into the post.

Mysterio heads outside to check on Van Dam and the delay lets Danny beat on Rey even more. A stretcher comes out for Van Dam and Mysterio goes outside AGAIN to ask what’s going on. WHAT DO YOU THINK IS GOING ON REY??? Danny gets two off a suplex and we hit the chinlock. Rey manages the sitout bulldog for two but Doug makes the save. A 619 hits Danny but it’s a switch so Doug’s chokebomb can connect for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C+. This was all they could do give Van Dam’s injury and it worked out pretty well all things considered. The Bashams are fine as champions (minus the S&M this time) and they even advanced Eddie’s issues with Rey. Unfortunately Van Dam’s knee was completely destroyed and he wouldn’t wrestle again for over a year.

Post match the Cabinet comes out to celebrate and Cole is sick because we’ll have to listen to them. The irony is strong with this one.

Hiroko says Kenzo Suzuki loves America and thinks John Cena is everything wrong with America. Tonight, Kenzo wins the US Title because God bless America. Hit that cheese grin.

JBL and the Cabinet are celebrating when they run into Big Show and Joy. They didn’t like what JBL and company did last week so it’s time for JBL to apologize. He apologizes immediately but Show wants something more sincere. Amy needs to apologize as well but she says Joy just wanted to be the center of attention last week. That makes her nothing more than a CENSORED and the catfight is on. Theodore Long makes the most well timed appearance in recent memory and makes a match between the women tonight.

Raw and Smackdown are coming to Tokyo next month.

Here’s Kurt Angle for the Invitational but first, he promises to take JBL’s title at the Rumble. You might have heard of this week’s opponent.

Kurt Angle vs. Roderick Strong

I love surprise cameos like this. Strong is very excited to be here and slaps Angle in the face. The bell rings so Strong runs away because he just has to beat the clock. Angle catches him though but Strong gets two off a rollup. A double chickenwing has Strong in trouble and Angle punches him in the face again. There’s the release German suplex and the ankle lock makes Strong tap in a hurry.

Wrestlemania Recall: Morton Downey Jr. in Piper’s Pit.

US Title: John Cena vs. Kenzo Suzuki

Cena is defending but first, he makes fun of Kenzo for thinking that he’s going to become more American tonight. If you want to know what America is about, look out into the crowd. America is why he wears these colors (an orange Tampa Bay Buccaneers jersey at the moment) and tonight, they’re going to whip Kenzo together. Suzuki slugs Cena down in the corner to start but Cena spears him down and hammers away. A bulldog drops Kenzo and there’s the Five Knuckle Shuffle (complete with bow). The shoes get pumped up and it’s the FU to retain the title in a hurry. The Cena roll continues.

Cena leaves through the crowd to celebrate.

Video on the weekend house show tour.

Amy is freaking out because she isn’t a wrestler and everyone has been banned from ringside.

Joy rubs baby oil on herself and gets a kiss for luck from Big Show.

Video on Heidenreich being scared of caskets and losing a match last week to keep the Rumble match a casket match.

Amy Weber vs. Joy Giovanni

Or not as there is no Joy. The music plays twice and no one is here so Amy wins via forfeit.

Show wants Long to find Joy and threatens violence if it doesn’t happen. Finlay and Steve Keirn are on the case. Everyone leaves so Heidenreich comes in to complain about the casket match again. The match is still on so get over it. Heidenreich leaves and JBL comes in but denies knowing anything about Joy’s disappearance.

Post break, JBL has given his alibi but Long says if he’s lying, the title is stripped next week.

Cruiserweight Title: Funaki vs. Nunzio

Funaki is defending and gets a jobber entrance. Nunzio goes right at him to start but gets kicked in the ribs. An armdrag sets up an early armbar on Nunzio, who gets up without too much effort. Back up and Nunzio dropkicks him out of the air, setting up his own chinlock. Funaki fights up again and hits a kick to the arm, followed by a high crossbody with Nunzio rolling through for his own near fall. Not that it matters as Funaki hits a sloppy tornado DDT to retain.

Rating: C-. This was a rather nice little match for such a short amount of time. The ending didn’t look great but given how little time they had, they were probably going faster than they should have. Funaki isn’t the long term champion but at least they’re getting the champion on TV more than once a month or so.

Long accuses Carlito of having something to do with Joy’s disappearance. Carlito says no but that does sound like another bad mark against Long’s status as General Manager. Long throws Carlito out but here are Jackie Gayda and Torrie Wilson to take his place. They saw Orlando Jordan following Joy on her way to the ring. Long sends for Jordan and says he should have known.

Post break Jordan has given his alibi as well….and then says he admits it. He told Joy Amy was going to hurt her but that was it. Show comes in and chokes Jordan, who says JBL was in a photo shoot when Joy disappeared. That better be true, or bones will be broken.

Raw Rebound.

The Chairman of the Florida Agricultural Society is here to honor JBL as their Man of the Year. We get the full entrance and the Chairman talks about JBL helping to replant orange trees after the hurricane season and supplying a bunch of fertilizer. JBL gets a plaque and we get a photo op before the required speech. He talks about helping the people of Florida live and prosper but he did it for that kid who goes to the breakfast table and wants orange juice. Or for the family who starts off on the right foot with a JBL chant to start their morning.

As JBL allows the fans to cheer him, Angle interrupts and accuses JBL of abducting Joy. Angle wants to know his plan but JBL keeps denying it. That’s not good enough for Angle, who hears noises coming from the trunk of JBL’s limo. Joy is indeed in there, drawing out medics to tend to her. Cue Show to cry over Joy and then turn back to JBL. The fight is on with Show cleaning house and beating the fire out of Jordan. A bunch of chair shots leave Jordan laying and Show glares at JBL in the crowd.

We cut to the back where Angle, Reigns and Jindrak talk about loving it when a plan comes together. They smile and walk off to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a very interesting show as while a lot happened, a good chunk of it was wrapped up by the end of the show or didn’t change that much. What it did do though was entertain me, which is so often lacking in wrestling. They did a bunch of stuff here and it was a fun show where I was wanting to see where things went. That’s a better way to spend two hours than doing the same stuff over and over, making this a rather nice surprise. I know you can’t have some big angle every week, but it was cool to have something different for a week.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 31, 2019
Location: 2300 Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis

We’re going back in time again tonight with the further adventures of the ECW stars in modern times, plus what should be the destruction of Glenn Gilbertti at the hands of Tessa Blanchard. Last week’s show wasn’t the kindest thing in the world so hopefully this one is a lot better. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Moose/The North vs. Rob Van Dam/Tommy Dreamer/Sabu

Maybe we can just get it out of the way early on. Dreamer and Page start things off with Dreamer getting in an armbar before handing it off to Sabu. Alexander comes in as well and the fans declare this awesome less than a minute in. Sabu’s legbar doesn’t work so he sends Alexander into the corner for a YOU STILL GOT IT chant. So apparently the fans here have no idea what IT is.

Moose and Van Dam come in for the pose/chant off before Van Dam kicks him in the face. The combination of Rolling Thunder/slingshot legdrop get two on Moose and it’s back to Dreamer, who gets kicked low. Back from a break with Moose trying his own Rolling Thunder but getting a chair pelted at his face instead. That’s enough for the warm tag to Van Dam, who hits the split legged moonsault for two on Alexander.

Everything breaks down and Sabu hits Air Sabu on Alexander. Sabu’s manager Super Genie hits his own, followed by another dive to the floor to drop the North. Moose hits No Jackhammer Needed on Dreamer but walks into the Van Daminator, leaving Sabu to bring in the table. An Arabian facebuster through the table, with the referee casually watching, sets up the Five Star to finish Page at 10:09.

Rating: D+. It’s not the worst match in the world or even close to it, but there are so many problems with this. The biggest thing is that, again, they’re catering to the live audience instead of the masses. What if you weren’t around for ECW’s heyday? Unless you’re at least thirty years old, odds are you weren’t a fan of the original ECW. Or what if you just didn’t like it? Yeah the fans in the arena are going to cheer, but outsiders see a bunch of old guys (with Dreamer being the youngest at 48) having a not very good match while the fans chant for another company. They didn’t have anything else to put in these spots?

Brian Cage is still banged up but he’s been cleared to train. He’ll meet Michael Elgin at Slammiversary.

Moose is tired of these people messing up so he’ll do things himself.

Glenn Gilbertti vs. Tessa Blanchard

Gilbertti drops to the floor and says that Tessa is one of the best female wrestlers in the world, though that doesn’t count very much. The road to superstardom is paved with potholes and you know how women drivers are. It’s clear that Tessa has daddy issues so tonight, Gilbertti will be her daddy. Tessa hits a bunch of forearms and a big forearm finishes Gilbertti at 2:59. Exactly how it should have gone, but it still feels like the most random detour for Tessa, who just got done with a huge feud against Gail Kim.

The Rascalz invade LAX’s clubhouse with the smoke and set up a match for later. Trey drinks a lot.

Rich Swann and Willie Mack are ready to get revenge on Michael Elgin and Johnny Impact tonight.

Desi Hit Squad vs. Deaners

For the love of all things good and holy make it short. Cody works on Raju’s arm to start but Raj pulls Raju to the floor for a breather. The big dives take them down though and we seem to be in near squash territory. Raj trips Cody and the Squad takes over with a dropkick to the back getting two.

That doesn’t last long though as it’s back to Jake as everything breaks down. The Squad hits a faceplant/top rope double stomp combination for two on Cody with Jake making the save. Jake posts himself though and Cody gets shoved off the top. Cody is fine enough to send them into each other though and a rollup finishes Raj at 6:05.

Rating: D+. Again, not that bad of a match but it felt like filler. Are we really supposed to believe that the Desi Hit Squad or the Deaners are going to move up towards the Tag Team Title picture? LAX and the Lucha Bros just had a blood feud for the titles that headlined a pay per view. I’m not buying the redneck cousins as being a serious threat.

Killer Kross is ready to hurt Eddie Edwards tonight. Kenny has been broken and Eddie will be next.

Elgin is ready to take the World Title at Slammiversary. Johnny Impact comes in to say he’s taking the X-Division Title at Slammiversary, so he’s ready to hurt people tonight. That’s cool with Elgin. Johnny plugs the upcoming special including the Great Muta, which is also cool with Elgin.

Killer Kross vs. Eddie Edwards

Hardcore. Kross is wearing a flack jacket but Eddie dives onto him anyway to start fast. A belly to back suplex drops Kross on the apron and it’s time for the weapons. That takes too long though and Kross takes over by sending him into the barricade. A trashcan shot and a suplex on the floor make it even worse for Eddie and they get inside for the first time. Eddie gets in a Blue Thunder Bomb onto a trashcan but Kross won’t stay down.

Some trashcan lid shots to the head get one and it’s time to bring in a small ladder. The Krossjacket Choke has Eddie in trouble so he hits a few metal sign shots to the head to escape. Kross kicks him in the head though, allowing him to load up some chairs. A chokebomb through the ladder on the chairs breaks Eddie in half but there’s no cover.

Instead more chairs are brought in but Eddie manages a sunset bomb onto all of them for two. Two more chairs are set up and Eddie loads up a tiger driver. That’s countered with a backdrop, which was supposed to be a belly to back piledriver but didn’t really come close. Kross loads up some lead lined gloves but here’s Sandman with a kendo stick to Kross, allowing Eddie to hit the Boston Knee Party for the pin at 13:51.

Rating: C. Eddie is one of the better performers Impact has ever had, winning everything there is to win around here, including the World Title. But what he really needed was Sandman’s endorsement. Yeah that guy who only ever succeeded in ECW? That’s the ticket for Eddie. I thought Sandman was cool back in the day and he certainly had his place, but come on with the ECW stuff already.

Post match Sandman gives Eddie Kenny II and beers are consumed. And yes, the fans are chanting for ECW instead of Eddie or Impact. That seems to be the plan all along.

Rosemary has the still chained up Su Yung when James Mitchell comes in. He recaps their entire feud, including Allie’s involvement and death. Mitchell wants Su back and blames Rosemary for Allie’s death. Rosemary chokes Jim and says she’s keeping Yung.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Chris Sabin/Kazarian/Christopher Daniels vs. Sanada/Great Muta/Yasu from Lockdown 2014.

OVE isn’t happy with Scarlett Bordeaux and Fallah Bahh. Next week, the Crists will take care of them.

Michael Elgin/Johnny Impact vs. Willie Mack/Rich Swann

Johnny Bravo is in Elgin/Impact’s corner. Mack and Swann hit the stereo flip dives to start us off in a hurry, which is probably their best idea. We take a break thirty seconds in (erg) and come back with Impact in trouble in the corner thanks to the reverse Cannonball from Mack. Johnny slides between his legs though and scores with an enziguri before handing it off to Elgin. Mack elbows his way out of trouble and manages to drag Elgin over to the corner for the tag off to Swann.

A powerbomb attempt is countered with a hurricanrana and Elgin almost punches Impact. Swann sends them into each other and rolls Elgin up for two. Elgin drives Mack into Swann for a crotching though and it’s a Death Valley Driver for two on Mack. Back from another break with Swann still in control until he ducks the Flying Chuck to the face. The hot tag brings in Mack for some rolling Wastelands to Impact but Elgin tags himself back in.

That means a slingshot elbow to Swann’s face and a big running flip dive to take out Mack and Impact. Johnny isn’t happy so Swann adds his own running flip dive dive onto all three. Back in and Elgin hits a heck of a superkick on Swann with Impact adding a knee to the head for two. The Moonlight Drive gets two and Elgin breaks up the handspring elbow to make things even worse.

Mack comes in for the Samoan drop and standing moonsault for no count as he isn’t legal. A Rock Bottom/neckbreaker combination gets two on Impact, who is fine enough for a middle rope Spanish Fly on Mack. Swann kicks Impact in the head and everyone is down. Elgin and Impact hit stereo superkicks but Impact hits Elgin by mistake, sending Elgin up the ramp. Swann kicks Impact in the face and hits the 450 for the pin at 22:58.

Rating: B+. This was a blast and I was actually surprised by the finish here. I was thinking they would go with the monster heels winning in the end but they kept both teams in there until I wasn’t sure who was winning in the end. Swann and Mack have something and I could see both of them going a lot higher up the card. Very good main event here after a very good Elgin vs. Swann match from a few weeks ago.

Overall Rating: C. It’s kind of amazing how this show can go from feeling like a bad indy promotion to having an awesome main event in the span of two hours. If nothing else, the main event shows what this company is capable of doing while they go with whatever else for the sake of either the easy way out or popping the audience in the arena. This company is capable of better and they showed that in the main event. Do more of that and less of the 50 year old crowd.

Results

Rob Van Dam/Tommy Dreamer/Sabu b. Moose/The North – Five Star Frog Splash to Page

Tessa Blanchard b. Glenn Gilbertti – Forearm

Deaners b. Desi Hit Squad – Rollup to Singh

Eddie Edwards b. Killer Kross – Boston Knee Party

Rich Swann/Willie Mack b. Michael Elgin/Johnny Impact – 450 to Impact

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: December 30, 2004
Location: Lakefront Arena, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’ll wrap up the year here as we’re back stateside after Tribute to the Troops. With that out of the way, it’s time to head towards the Royal Rumble, which hasn’t really been set up yet. It’s hard to say what we’re going to be getting tonight as Smackdown can go anywhere from one extreme to the other. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

General Manager Theodore Long announces that tonight will be the Night of Champions with every champion defending their title against an opponent of their choosing. I think you know where this is going.

Opening sequence.

Here’s John Cena to get things going. Cena talks about the calendar changing but the champ is still here. His New Year’s Resolution is to start a revolution, meaning that from now on there is no such thing as a John Cena fan. From now on, you’re a part of the chain gang and the same of him. They all fight and ride together and since they’re so close, Cena goes out into the crowd. Back in the ring, it’s time for the US Title match so come get a shot.

US Title: John Cena vs. Rene Dupree

Cena is defending and say if you want some, come get some, making this the first ever US Open Challenge. Dupree comes charging in and gets caught in a fisherman’s buster, allowing Cena to put on his robe. That means a funny little dance before the Shuffle and it’s time for Dupree to bail. Cena won’t have that though and catches Dupree with some headbutts. Back in and Dupree manages to whip him into the corner and then avoid a high crossbody, setting up the French Tickler. Cena is fine enough to drop him throat first across the top rope and the FU is good for the pin.

Rating: D. This was pretty much a squash with Cena barely breaking a sweat. The important thing here though is that Cena looked like a star and a main eventer, though there has been no mention of him going after the World Title yet. You can see the confidence in his eyes and that’s a great sign for the future.

JBL and Amy Weber have some great idea when they run into Joy Giovanni. Amy calls her fat and Joy asks what is up with the weird skin hanging from Amy’s neck. JBL yells at Joy but Big Show interrupts. Show wants the title shot tonight, which JBL will take into consideration. Amy and Joy are acceptable in these roles, assuming you ignore that the roles don’t need to exist.

Here’s Kurt Angle for his open challenge. He wants the shot at JBL as well, because Angle made him tap out two weeks ago. First though, let’s get on with the challenge.

Kurt Angle vs. Matt Stryker

Not the well known Striker. Angle wrestles him to the mat and hits a few shots to the head. The ankle lock is good for the tap in less than a minute.

Rob Van Dam and Rey Mysterio go over possible opponents for tonight. Van Dam suggests Moolah and Mae Young when Eddie Guerrero and Booker T. come in. The challenge is thrown out and I think you know where this is going. Eddie and Booker get in an argument over what the team name should be, with Booker thinking his name should be first because it’s alphabetical. Eddie: “What alphabet is that? The ebonics alphabet???”

We look back at Undertaker vs. Heidenreich last week with Heidenreich walking out. They’ll meet again at the Royal Rumble and Undertaker gets to pick the stipulation. We really need to build to that?

Daniel Puder introduces himself to the locker room but knocks someone’s bag off the bench. That would be Hardcore Holly, who doesn’t want to hear about Puder training for eight weeks. Puder apologizes for Holly taking eleven years to get here but wonders why Holly has never been in the main event of Wrestlemania. That’s where Puder is going to go after he wins the Royal Rumble. Holly thinks Puder has a lot to learn.

Long has another random woman in his office when JBL, Weber and Orlando Jordan come in. JBL is glad about getting to choose his opponent and has everyone’s name in a fish bowl. He draws a name and wants to go again but Long says it’s whoever is on that paper. JBL reluctantly agrees.

Smackdown World Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Shannon Moore

Moore is challenging and takes the Clothesline From JBL for the pin in about twenty seconds.

Post match Long comes out because he knows something is up. He wants to see what’s in the fish bowl, which Amy tries to hide. JBL yells a lot and Amy tries to leave but Joy jumps her from behind and the papers fall on the floor. As luck would have it, Long finds every paper has Moore’s name. Since JBL got to pick tonight, Long will pick for the Royal Rumble. That would be Kurt Angle, who comes out and calls JBL a liar, along with BUCKO. Angle calls him out for beating up someone small, with JBL saying Angle does that every week. Long cuts it off with a surprise: it’s going to be a triples threat match, also including Big Show.

Carlito doesn’t like Long and has a New Year’s Resolution of his own: to get rid of Long as GM. You can feel the petition coming from here. Josh Matthews can also feel the apple landing on his face from the spit.

Here’s Heidenreich for a chat because it seems that they’re giving us a break from the wrestling this week. Heidenreich insists that he is NOT scared of the Undertaker and even tried to give Undertaker a way out last week. Now Undertaker wants more? The Royal Rumble will be his final resting place because Heidenreich does not fear him.

Undertaker’s voice is heard and he promises to make Heidenreich rest in peace. Cue the druids with the casket, which of course has Undertaker inside. Heidenreich freaks as Cole speculates that we could be having a casket match. This would be your weekly example of “we don’t need commentary here”.

Mark Jindrak and Luther Reigns say they should be getting the Tag Team Title shot tonight because they’re awesome. The Basham Brothers come in to say they’re the real competition because they’re former champions. Eddie and Booker come in to say they’re winning the titles.

Cruiserweight Title: Funaki vs. Spike Dudley

Funaki is defending in an Armageddon rematch. Spike starts fast with some slams to start but the top rope double stomp misses. That’s not good enough for Funaki to get away so Spike wraps the ribs around the post. Tazz starts singing Auld Lang Syne as Spike stomps away in the corner. Commentary switches to a discussion about Dick Clark as the audio is clearly being dubbed over something else. Funaki gets in an enziguri and a bulldog for two, followed by a sunset flip (with a pretty fast count) to retain.

Rating: D+. They barely had time to do anything here and I had almost forgotten that Funaki was champion. The Cruiserweight division is already looking like it could go away with nothing changing and that’s not a good sign so soon after a new champion. There are talented cruiserweights around, but if they’re never going to be featured, it doesn’t really matter.

Long video on Tribute To The Troops.

Michelle McCool, Rochelle and Lauren are in the back and hit on Cena as he gets coffee. He doesn’t like being interrupted but changes his tune very quickly when he sees who they are. Lauren: “Can we see it?” Michelle: “Can we touch it?” Rochelle: “Can we play with it?” They mean the spinner belt. Cena seems pleased.

Raw Rebound.

RVD thinks Dawn Marie and Torrie Wilson should get the shot. Rey goes with the actual pick of Booker and Eddie (with Cole being shocked, as you knew he would be). Rey: “THEN we’ll face Dawn Marie and Torrie Wilson.”

Tag Team Titles: Eddie Guerrero/Booker T. vs. Rob Van Dam/Rey Mysterio

Eddie and Booker are challenging and during their entrances, we hear about how awesome last week was. Rey and Eddie start things off with Rey hitting a quick headscissors for an early standoff. We’ll switch things up a bit as Eddie grabs a hammerlock but that’s broken up as well, meaning the second standoff. Booker comes in and muscles Rey into the corner until Rey pops up with a dropkick.

It’s off to Van Dam and the fans are rather pleased with the change of pace. A headlock slows Booker down so he suplexes his way out, only to have Rob grab it again on the mat. Rob slams him down and it’s the 4:20 for two more. Everything breaks down for a bit with Rey being sent outside so the champs can take a breather. Back from a break with Rey missing a charge into the post to put him in trouble.

Eddie comes in for some right hands and sends Rey into a spinning kick to the face from Booker. Rey fights back with forearms to Eddie and a tornado DDT to put both of them down. Van Dam comes in for some shots to the face which don’t appear to have the most effort behind them. A monkey flip sets up the Five Star to Eddie so Booker makes a save. This time it’s Van Dam going shoulder first into the post and Booker clotheslines him down to break up a tag attempt.

Eddie hits Three Amigos for two on Van Dam with Rey making his own save. Booker grabs the chinlock as things settle down a bit. Rey has to break up a cover off a Book End, this time allowing Rob to kick Booker in the face. It’s back to Rey for a super hurricanrana on Booker but the ref gets bumped.

The 619 hits Booker but Eddie breaks up the springboard. Booker kicks Rey and Rob kicks Booker, followed by a hurricanrana to take both of them to the floor. With no referee, Eddie is tempted to go after a title, which he throws to Rey for the old playing possum spot. The referee actually catches on this time and Rey grabs a victory roll to retain.

Rating: B. This felt like a match where they were getting ready to launch into a great one but they just never got to that other level. Either way, it’s very nice to end the year on a rather good match with four people who can go for a long time. Counting commercials, this was over twenty minutes, which you don’t see to often.

Eddie and Booker aren’t happy but seem to agree that it was fair to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The main event helped but it felt like a lot of the people were taking the last week of the year off. Aside from the main event, nothing got any serious time with two of the matches adding up to less than a minute and a half. That being said, it makes a lot of sense to have a lighter show like this as they can start the build to the Royal Rumble next week. This was basically a week off and that’s ok given that it wasn’t likely to be a show many people were going to be watching in the first place.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: May 24, 2019
Location: 2300 Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis

You knew this was coming at some point and there was no way around it. This week’s show is headlined by an ECW tribute match between Rob Van Dam and Tommy Dreamer. They’re both somewhat regulars around here, but I still can’t stand it when the promotion stops what they’re doing to praise a promotion that went out of business nearly twenty years ago. How many times have they done this over the years? Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap of last week’s pretty good show.

Opening sequence.

Sami Callihan vs. Fallah Bahh

Sami is on his own but Bahh has Scarlett Bordeaux. Callihan goes straight at him in the corner so Bahh is back with a clothesline and running splash. Some running clotheslines don’t do much to Bahh, who slams Callihan with little effort. Bahh’s spinning elbow gets two and the toe goes into Sami’s mouth.

That earns Bahh a bite and Callihan is knocked outside. They head outside with the spit chop having Bahh in even more trouble. A middle rope clothesline knocks Bahh down again and it’s back to the toe. Some shots to the head anger Bahh, but he gets taken right back down into a chinlock. Bahh fights up again and screams his name a lot, meaning it’s time for some chops and a belly to belly.

The Banzai Drop is loaded up too early and Sami knees him down for two. The Samoan drop (he likes drops) plants Sami to set up the Banzai Drop but here are the Crists for the save. Jake superkicks Dave by mistake so Scarlett takes Jake down, leaving Bahh to plant Sami. Bahh hits the suicide dive onto the Crists but a hanging Cactus Special finishes Bahh (with feet on the ropes) at 10:47.

Rating: C-. Not too bad here with a lot of stuff going on to make it a little better. Scarlett and Bahh’s Beauty and the Beast thing is an easy way to go, though Scarlett seems to be destined for something a lot bigger. Bahh has been putting in the effort recently though and has slimmed down a bit. I still see potential in OVE, but they never really break through to the other side for some reason.

Tommy Dreamer talks about wrestling Rob Van Dam in this building in 1996 (first match I can find for them there was in 1997). Then they headlined Madison Square Garden to unify the Hardcore and Intercontinental Titles (that match didn’t headline the show) and then Hardcore Justice (Dreamer and Van Dam were never involved in a match together, either working with or against each other, at any Hardcore Justice event, nor did Dreamer ever main event one of those shows). They’ll bring it against each other and make it extreme one more time. Or for the first time since he isn’t the most accurate narrator.

Johnny Impact has the red X from United We Stand that makes him #1 contender to the X-Division Title. He insults Michael Elgin, who is right behind him. Impact backpedals and suggests that they team up against Rich Swann and Willie Mack.

Knockouts Title: Madison Rayne vs. Taya Valkyrie

Taya is defending after losing to Madison in a series of non-title matches. Madison chases her outside and then back inside so the punching can begin. A middle rope crossbody gives Madison two and we take a break. Back with Madison getting two off a cutter to send Taya outside. Taya suckers her to the floor and gets in a kick to the leg to take over. With Don making some subtle references to Josh being Madison’s husband, Taya starts in on the leg. That means we stop for some posing before it’s off to the half crab.

The rope break gets Madison out of trouble so it’s the swinging Rock Bottom to take her down again. The limping Madison forearms back, only to walk into a spear. Madison is right back with her own half crab (which she used to win last time). Taya evens up the rope grabbing score and grabs the referee for a distraction, setting up the Road to Valhalla to retain the title at 14:07.

Rating: C. This was a good way to wrap up the story which didn’t overstay its welcome. Madison might not be the most interesting talent in the world but she’s more than capable of having a match like this. Taya winning when she had to makes her seem especially dangerous, though you can feel the showdown with Tessa coming from here, as should be the case.

Post match here’s Rosemary with the chained up Su Yung so Taya bails in a hurry.

The Deaners eat and talk about getting in shape. Their solution: beers and cheese steaks.

Rosemary and Yung run into James Mitchell, who isn’t happy with them. He wants Yung back but Rosemary tells him to go back and cower at his father’s boots. Rosemary wants the title now and Yung is going to die.

Flashback Moment Of The Week: Sami Callihan vs. Pentagon from last year’s Slammiversary.

Eddie Edwards talks about his highs and lows with Kenny by his side. Next week, he’s getting back at Killer Kross for breaking Kenny in half.

The Rascalz hate training and argue with each other so the smoke starts up again and everything is calm. We get a fresh training montage, which goes far better than last week.

The North vs. LAX

Non-title. Santana works on Alexander’s arm to start and it’s quickly off to Ortiz for a rollup. Page comes in and takes LAX’s rapid fire double teaming, setting up a suicide dive onto Alexander. Back in and Alexander takes Ortiz down for a top rope elbow from Page as the villains take over. A suplex out of the corner gives Alexander two and Page grabs the chinlock.

That’s broken up in short order and Santana comes in off the hot tag to clean house. A dropkick through the ropes sends Page up the ramp and it’s time for some kicks to Alexander’s head. Page comes back in for a knee to Santana’s head to give Alexander two of his own and a double Neutralizer is good for the same on Ortiz. LAX has had it though and their rapid fire kicks into the double belly to back faceplant finishes Alexander at 8:19.

Rating: C+. Nice match here, despite the North being one of the least interesting teams this side of the Desi Hit Squad. I know Don Callis is booking but is that really the best idea they have? They’re the tag team version of Petey Williams with the main sticking point of their characters being that they’re from Canada. At least the match was pretty good though, which does help a lot.

Here’s Glenn Gilbertti for a special exhibition. He hates women’s wrestling and wants to prove how worthless women are so here’s Ashley Vox to challenge him. Gilbertti asks which of the boys she’s dating because she must have been fired from Hooters.

Glenn Gilbertti vs. Ashley Vox

Gilbertti shoves her down to start and talks trash on the mic while sending her into the buckle and grabbing a hard headlock on the mat. Gilbertti: “I know this isn’t a five star match but it’s not my fault!” More trash talk lets Vox get in a rollup and some dropkicks so Gilbertti hits the Chartbuster. That’s good for two with Gilbertti pulling her up and shouting that Vox kicked out of his finish. Cue Tessa Blanchard to chase Gilbertti off for the no contest at about 3:30.

Rating: F. I get what they’re going for (it’s not exactly subtle) and Gilbertti is good at what he’s doing, but this feels like it’s out of 1984. This was going to be Eli Drake and that would have helped with the blowoff, because there is no reason to believe that this is going to end with anything other than Tessa beating him in ten seconds. They spent months building up Tessa for Gail Kim and this is the best they have for her? You can’t just have her slaughter some jobbers for a few weeks until she has something else to do? It’s not the worst, but it certainly feels like a bottom of the barrel storyline.

Rohit Raju vs. Petey Williams vs. Ace Austin vs. Dezmond Xavier

They start fast with Austin hitting a springboard spinning kick to Raju’s jaw. Petey’s slingshot Codebreaker staggers Austin and a running bulldog drops him onto Raju. Austin breaks up a very early Canadian Destroyer attempt and it’s time to cut Raju’s finger with the playing card. Dez comes in and fires off the strikes, plus a suicide dive onto Raju. Austin adds his own dive and kicks some people in the head. Petey comes back in with a Canadian Destroyer to Austin but Raju stomps on his back to break up one on Dez. The backflip kick to Raju’s head gives Dez the pin at 3:49.

Rating: C-. Was there really a need to not even give them four minutes? This was entertaining while it lasted but it felt like the first third of a fun match that never got the chance to get going. The X-Division could use some fresh blood and there are some viable challengers in here, with the Rascalz being great candidates along with Austin.

Next week: Impact/Elgin vs. Mack/Swann, Eddie Edwards vs. Killer Kross in a street fight and Gilbertti vs. Blanchard.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Rob Van Dam

They soak in the dueling chants and the ECDUB chants are back in full force. Feeling out process to start with Dreamer getting in a suplex of all things before stopping for a high five. Dreamer seems rather pleased and it’s even better as he trips Van Dam down for a headscissors. Rob flips up and we get another I RESPECT YOU TOO BUDDY staredown. Back up and Dreamer starts punching away until a kick to the face cuts him off. They head outside (you knew this was coming) with Dreamer throwing water in his eyes and then…going back inside because we’re not going full extreme here.

Rob grabs the chair instead and skateboards it into Dreamer’s face in the corner. Dreamer is right back by putting Rob in the Tree of Woe for the running dropkick (after the ECW chant of course). Rolling Thunder misses and Dreamer hits the DDT on the chair for two more. The fans want the table but settle for Rob’s spinning legdrop on the chair. Dreamer is right back up with the piledriver and a flipping sell from Rob. An elbow hits the chair and Rob is right back with a drop toehold into the chair ala Raven. The Five Star finishes Dreamer at 9:23.

Rating: D. It wasn’t terrible and they didn’t embarrass themselves, but is there a reason that these two are getting almost ten minutes and the X-Division guys, who are going to be here in a few years and could be stars of the future, are stuck cramming in everything they can into less than four minutes? Are Van Dam and Dreamer really the best this company can do for a draw to a TV taping? The guys were trying, but it just makes you realize that their heyday was twenty years ago. That’s the best you have?

Post match the North runs in to beat down Van Dam and Dreamer with Moose coming in to make it even worse. The lights go out and freaking Sabu is here with the chairs for the save. A Van Daminator lets the ECW guys pose to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. There are two big issues sticking out in this show and it hurts everything else. The booking goes from fine to “we’re really doing this?” far too often and that’s going to become an issue. It’s still a watchable show, but they seem to force these things in for the sake of some short term booking which could be used on much more valuable stuff. I don’t need to see Gilbertti, Van Dam and Dreamer (though he’s on every show anymore) in 2019, though Impact seems to think they’re the best options. What does that say about how they view their own talent?

Results

Sami Callihan b. Fallah Bahh – Hanging Cactus Special with feet on the ropes

Taya Valkyrie b. Madison Rayne – Road to Valhalla

LAX b. The North – Double belly to back faceplant to Alexander

Glenn Gilbertti vs. Ashley Vox went to a no contest when Tessa Blanchard interfered

Dez b. Rohit Raju, Petey Williams and Ace Austin – Backflip kick to Raju’s head

Rob Van Dam b. Tommy Dreamer – Five Star Frog Splash

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 10, 2019
Location: Rebel Sports Entertainment Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

We’re still in Canada and we still don’t have a World Champion around at the moment due to Brian Cage’s back injury. What we do have though is a new #1 contender in the form of Michael Elgin, who seems rather content with waiting around until Cage gets back. I’m not sure what that means for this week so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap, with the World Title situation getting some extra time, as it should.

Opening sequence.

Josh: “We sit just fifty eight days away from Slammiversary!” You might want to wait a bit on that countdown.

Moose/Josh Alexander vs. LAX

Non-title and no Konnan with LAX. Alexander and Santana start things off with an exchange of wristlocks until Ortiz comes in for the running splash. It’s off to Moose, who puts Ortiz on top and dropkicks him to the floor. That leaves Callus enough time to list off Moose’s athletic stats and then say they’re off the charts. Hence why they have been charted you see. Back to Alexander for some forearms in the corner and the required chinlock.

Ortiz fights up and suplexes Alexander into a Stunner for the tag off to Santana. Moose gets sent outside and it’s a double flapjack into a facebuster combination to drop Alexander again. It’s already back to Moose for the power, including a powerbomb to Ortiz onto Santana. The chokebomb gets two on Santana but Moose hits Alexander by mistake, allowing LAX to hit a double enziguri. With Moose down on the ground, LAX hits their usual flurry into the double faceplant to finish Alexander at 7:38.

Rating: C. LAX can do no wrong at this point and that was the case again here, with another entertaining performance against a team that didn’t have the best chemistry. If nothing else though, hearing “their opponents, Moose and Josh Alexander” sounds a lot better than The North. That’s such a bad name for a team and while their work is good, it sounds like the most indy of names.

Madison Rayne is ready for her third non-title match against Taya Valkyrie, even if Taya doesn’t have to defend the title for thirty days. I get the story they’re going for here, but Madison is another shining example of what is wrong with a lot of the roster: she’s perfectly adequate. She’s going to give you a fine match, a fine promo and a fine everything, but there’s no reaching for the next level. Madison, along with so many others on the roster, are a safe bet and that’s a big reason why Impact never goes any higher than they already are.

Tommy Dreamer gives his partners a big pep talk about how they’re all a bunch of misfits. He knows about that, because he used to work for ECW. I actually yelled at my screen OH MY GOODNESS SHUT UP ABOUT ECW. Dreamer promises that the team will fight tonight, because this is the kind of company he wants to fight for.

Announcers’ preview.

Madison Rayne vs. Taya Valkyrie

Non-title again and Tessa Blanchard comes out for commentary, definitely acting a lot more faceish. Taya heads straight outside for the stalling so Madison chases her back inside, where the champ gets in a dropkick to the head. That means the always annoying break less than a minute in and we come back with Madison hitting a running shoulder in the corner.

Taya throws her down again and we have an inset window showing Tessa on commentary. I don’t really need to watch commentary talking, but EGADS is that better than cutting to Gail every ten seconds. Taya cuts off a springboard with a faceplant and it’s a Jeff Hardy legdrop between the legs. A little dance sets up Taya bending Madison’s ribs around the post as the announcers talk almost non-stop about Gail vs. Tessa.

Back in and Madison gets in a tornado DDT, followed by a few forearms for two. A windup cutter gives Madison two as Tessa forgets that this is non-title. Taya stops for more trash talk and slow kicks to the back/chest. A big kick is countered into a half crab and Taya taps immediately at 12:08.

Rating: C-. The story is fine and they can do a title match before Slammiversary, but I’m still not buying Madison as a top challenger. She hasn’t missed a step since her previous run, but that doesn’t make her all that inspiring. Taya tapping so fast makes sense and it’s very nice that they’re doing a story with the champion losing over and over again rather than just doing it and rarely going anywhere other than “here’s a title shot to make it 50/50”.

This week’s Flashback Moment of the Week: Rob Van Dam beats Abyss at Bound For Glory.

Van Dam thinks he’s facing Diamond Dallas Page tonight instead of Ethan Page. He’s not worried about Rob Van Dam.

Rosemary wants a Demon Collar match against Su Yung, winner take all. That would be all the souls/people I presume?

Jordynne Grace vs. Alexia Nicole

Grace shrugs off the kicks to the leg and hits a one armed delayed vertical suplex. Nicole’s sleeper doesn’t work at all and it’s a giant swing to make it even worse. A clothesline goes even worse for Nicole and Grave hits a torture rack into a spinning powerbomb. The Grace Driver is good for the pin at 3:03.

Rating: D. Grace continues to look dominant and at some point they’ll make her the monster champion that she should be. Sometimes you need a nice squash like this as it’s one of the best ways to keep someone over. She doesn’t have anything going on right now but keeping her dominant on TV like this works just fine.

Josh Alexander gives Ethan Page a pep talk for his match with Van Dam tonight.

Kiera Hogan walked away from Rosemary last week because that’s what Rosemary wanted. She has tried to be friends with everyone around here and it hasn’t worked. Grace comes in to say they are friends but Kiera doesn’t care about her. Grace can die like Allie did.

Ethan Page vs. Rob Van Dam

Alexander is here with Page and the announcers talk about Van Dam’s marijuana enthusiasm as both villains yell at Rob. They’re knocked to the floor as the discussion moves over to ECW and all the great moments Rob had there. An Alexander distraction breaks up the spinning kick to Page’s back and it’s Page taking over in the corner.

A backbreaker and suplex have Van Dam in trouble but he’s back with kicks to the face. Rolling Thunder looks to set up the Five Star but Alexander’s distraction lets Page get up. There’s a bicycle kick to Rob, who is right back with a spinwheel kick. The Five Star (with very little elevation) finishes Page at 6:10.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t terrible or even bad, but it was a 48 year old Van Dam playing the hits while the announcers tried to treat it as anything other than nostalgia/a way to draw a crowd for Philadelphia next week. There’s nothing wrong with Van Dam not being able to do it as well as he used to, but treating him like he’s still the same athlete is hard to take. Bringing Rob back in makes sense as he has star power, but I’m worried about how hard they’re going to push him at this point.

Brian Cage is still injured and starting rehab on his back soon.

Johnny Impact comes up to Michael Elgin and they argue over who injured Cage. Elgin will send him to the hospital to prove he’s right.

Deaners vs. Desi Hit Squad vs. Brent Banks/Aiden Prince vs. Rascalz

Banks flips a lot and dropkicks Raju into the corner so it’s off to Singh as we’re already in the rapid fire offense as no one is going to have time to really showcase themselves. The Squad takes over on Prince with a boot to the face giving Raju two. Prince gets in a kick of his own and the fans want the Deaners, showing that Canadian fans don’t have the best taste. The Deaners come in a few seconds later as everything breaks down with the Rascalz taking over. Wentz hits a big dive onto a bunch of people and Dezmond hits a cartwheel corkscrew dive but Raju uses the distraction to roll Cousin Jake up for the pin at 5:05.

Rating: D+. What am I supposed to say here? The Desi Hit Squad wins (because the Rascalz aren’t allowed to build any momentum) in a match with eight people trying to get stuff in over the course of about five minutes. It’s too much in one match and the Squad winning took away a lot of the energy that the match could have build up.

Killer Kross talks about stealing Kenny the Kendo Stick last week, which he did to prove a point. Now he wants to hear from Eddie Edwards. Tick tock.

LAX is in the Rascalz clubhouse and they talk about lions protecting the stash. Ortiz wants to fight the Rockers, the Eliminators, Bert and Ernie and Tango and Cash. Shots are consumed.

The announcers talk about going to the 2300 Arena next week and say EXTREME about half a dozen times.

Tommy Dreamer/Fallah Bahh/Rich Swann/Willie Mack vs. OVE

OVE Rules, meaning anything goes and Scarlett Bordeaux is here with the non-Ohioans. Joined in progress after a break with Bahh splashing Dave Crist in the corner. It’s time for some chairs with Dave being slammed onto the steel, leaving everyone to head outside. Mack comes back in and slams Sami, setting up a standing moonsault onto Dave. The big flip dive lets Mack knock everyone down, followed by Dave moonsaulting off the top onto everyone else. Jake dives, then Tommy dives as we get in the required exchange of dives out of the way. Dreamer heads to the back to get something as we take a break.

Back with the weapons abounding, including a big ladder that Dreamer pulled out. Dreamer wraps the ladder around his head and does the spinning knockdowns until Fulton gets in a shot to take over. Fulton sets the ladder up on the ramp as Sami and Dave beat on Fallah with a chair. That leaves Mack to pile a bunch of stuff up in the ring, only to take a cutter from Jake for two.

Bahh’s belly to belly onto a trashcan gets two but he’s fine enough to set up some chairs. A superplex to Dave is broken up with Fulton powerbombing Bahh through some chairs. The chair wrapped in barbed wire is sat on Bahh’s chest for a top rope double stomp into a near fall. Swann comes back in (Was he in at all?) and goes to the ladder but Fulton makes the save, allowing Dave to hit a super cutter off the ladder.

Fulton dives off the ladder into a Samoan drop to give Bahh two. Dreamer busts out the Legos and DDTs Sami and Dave onto them for no cover. That leaves the barefooted Bahh to walk onto the Legos but Fulton plants him with a chokeslam. Mack Stuns Fulton onto a chair but Sami blasts Mack with a stop sign. The Cactus Special onto the Legos gives Sami the pin at 16:29.

Rating: C+. It’s a garbage brawl that I’ve seen done a million times but they were putting in some effort and got the time to make it feel more violent. I’m not sure why you would have Mack take the fall when you have Dreamer in there, but they do seem to be teasing a Mack vs. Swann feud. This wasn’t bad, and thank goodness they didn’t put it in the ECW Arena instead.

Overall Rating: D+. I really wasn’t feeling this one as it seems that they’re building up to both Slammiversary but more importantly the 2300 Arena shows. It’s not the worst thing in the world, but I’m worried about how big of an ECW tribute we’ll have to sit through for the next few weeks. This wasn’t terrible, though they’ve lost some momentum from Rebellion.

Results

LAX b. Moose/Josh Alexander – Double faceplant to Alexander

Madison Rayne b. Taya Valkyrie – Half crab

Jordynne Grace b. Alexia Nicole – Grace Driver

Rob Van Dam b. Ethan Page – Five Star Frog Splash

Desi Hit Squad b. Rascalz, Brent Banks/Aiden Prince and Deaners – Rollup to Jake

OVE b. Tommy Dreamer/Fallah Bahh/Rich Swann/Willie Mack – Cactus Special to Mack

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6