Smackdown – December 2, 2004: The Teacher Has Left The Room

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: December 2, 2004
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re finally into December and things have been a near nightmare around here as of late. With a combination of the Tough Enough stuff taking over the show and very limited wrestling, I’m not sure what is supposed to make me want to keep watching the thing. That has never stopped WWE before though so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

JBL and the Cabinet (complete with the Bashams being named the Co-Secretaries of Defense) arrive late with Theodore Long not being happy. Tonight the Bashams can face Booker T. and Eddie Guerrero while JBL and Orlando Jordan can face the Undertaker. Two matches made in less than two minutes. Not too shabby.

Opening sequence.

Rey Mysterio/Rob Van Dam/Torrie Wilson vs. Kenzo Suzuki/Rene Dupree/Hiroko

Fallout from last week’s brawl which started over Kenzo oogling Torrie. Hiroko shoves Torrie before the bell and strikes the Crane Kick pose because we need more stereotypes in this one. Rob and Rene start things off but hang on as Dupree needs to bow to Suzuki first. We get what looks like one of the same sequences Van Dam used to do with Jerry Lynn until Rene is sent to the floor.

That leaves the women to come in and roll over Kenzo, who likes it so much that he swivels his hips. Rey loads up a 619 on Hiroko but walks into a spinebuster, followed by the French Tickler. Rey is back up and plants Rene, setting up a Five Star from Van Dam so Rey can grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D-. I have no idea what the point of this was other than stretching us out for another week before we get to what should be a layup of a title change at the pay per view. The match was barely a thing and focused way too much on the stupid Kenzo angle. He hasn’t been interesting since he debuted and that isn’t going to change with having a thing for Torrie.

After that waste of time, here are the Tough Enough guys for their weekly shindig. Ryan Reeves isn’t quitting due to his broken ribs so let’s look at who each person wants voted off.

Mizanin wants Puder gone because he’s a suckup and hasn’t actually fought in the UFC.

Reeves wants Puder gone for not wanting to be a wrestler and only being here to get himself over in MMA.

Smith wants Puder gone for being too overconfident.

Puder wants Smith off because he’s been on other shows before and doesn’t want to be a wrestler.

Ryan Reeves is voted off. That leaves us with three, and next week another will be voted off. The remaining two will box at Armageddon, but there’s another competition tonight. This week: they get to dress like women.

Hiroko doesn’t like Kenzo wanting Torrie and since her milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, she wants Torrie in a bra and panties match next week.

Charlie Haas vs. Jesus

Before the bell, Carlito gets in the ring and says he doesn’t like Charlie hogging up the women like Jackie and Dawn Marie. Carlito hits on Jackie and puts his hand on her shoulder so Charlie grabs him, meaning it’s a beatdown from Jesus. Haas gets posted and chained in the chest. No match.

Post match Long yells at Carlito and Jesus, the latter of whom gets to have a street fight against John Cena at Armageddon.

Raw Rebound.

Michelle McCool stretches with Eddie Guerrero and Booker T. She feels some negative energy though and the tensions seem ready to boil over. They argue over losing title shots but Michelle calms them down before their tag match later. At least she has a few perks.

Basham Brothers vs. Eddie Guerrero/Booker T.

JBL is out for commentary with Jordan at his side. After a quick argument over who gets to start, Booker knocks Doug into the corner and stomps him down. A running clothesline puts Doug on the floor and we take a break. Back with Eddie leg lariating Danny into the corner for some stomping of his own.

Some double teaming lets the Bashams take over so Eddie snaps off a hurricanrana to get himself out of trouble. Eddie feeds Doug into a side kick from Booker for two but the referee yells at Eddie, allowing the Bashams to take over again. We cut over to JBL ranting about how awesome of an athlete he is as the Bashams take turns on Booker.

The flapjack plants Doug and Eddie comes in as JBL threatens lawsuits over commentary criticizing him. Everything breaks down and Eddie low bridges Doug but sends Booker to the floor at the same time by mistake. The argument is on and Danny knocks Eddie into Booker from behind. We’ll get to the explosion later, but for now it’s a rollup with ropes to give Danny the pin.

Rating: C. The Bashams have had one match as part of the Cabinet and they’re already about 18485% better than Jordan. They look better, they’re actually effective in the ring and they didn’t need three chinlocks to get them through a nine minute match. This was all it needed to be and Eddie vs. Booker could be good once we’re done with the pay per view.

Post match JBL Clotheslines Eddie and Booker.

Kurt Angle Invitational: Kurt Angle vs. Sebastian McCauley

Angle Slam and ankle lock in less than a minute.

Post match Angle has Mark Jindrak and Luther Reigns join him in the ring because he wants to make something right. Now he wants Joy Giovanni in the ring because she was embarrassed last week. Reigns apologizes for last week with the Thanksgiving meal because he got carried away. As an apology, he offers her dinner tonight, his treat of course.

Joy accepts the apology but says she already has dinner plans with Big Show. Angle thinks that’s insulting to the three of them so Reigns gets more aggressive in asking about that dinner. Cue Big Show for the save and a challenge to fight all three of them at once but the bad guys bail.

We look back at last week’s Christmas in Iraq.

And now, the Tough Enough contestants in drag. Mizanin is in a Metallica shirt, Daisy Duke shorts and has a six pack of Miller Lite. As a bonus, he even does the slow lean into the ring ala Stacy Keibler. The other two are just guys in drag with little effort. Cue Hardcore Holly (Cole: “If anyone was homophobic, it would be Hardcore Holly.”) to say these are some ugly women.

They each have thirty seconds to prove that Holly is the object of their affections, which is too far for Holly. Snow: “Are you saying you’re not tough enough?”

Holly actually stays and Michelle Mizanin (just go with it) asks if he likes whips and chains. He leans over and asks if Hardcore can smack that and thankfully the time is up.

Justina Smith talks about speaking with Hardcore’s mama, who says he likes lobsters. For a present, he pulls out a bottle of “crunk juice”….and a live lobster. Snow: “GIVE ME THE MIC!”

Daniella Puder has a Puder Bear and admires the way Holly fills out his trunks.

Mizanin wins, ending one of the most embarrassing things I’ve ever seen as a wrestling fan. Thankfully Holly punches Snow out for putting him through all this.

Armageddon rundown.

Here’s Dawn Marie to say that her sexy Santa outfit is better than Jackie’s earlier tonight. Jackie runs out and the brawl is on. Long comes out and makes a match between the two of them at Armageddon with Haas as guest referee.

Undertaker vs. John Bradshaw Layfield/Orlando Jordan

The Bashams are banned from ringside but Amy Weber is given a chair. Jordan starts for the team as JBL chills on the floor, looking rather terrified. The threat of a right hand sends JBL bailing off the apron but Jordan’s kick to the face just annoys Undertaker again. A trip to the floor lets Undertaker beat up Jordan some more, followed by a Downward Spiral for two back inside.

JBL makes the save and gets Snake Eyes into a big boot and the bad guys are sent outside in a heap to end us to a break. Back with Undertaker hitting a side slam for two on Jordan with JBL making another save. The apron legdrop crushes JBL and the jumping clothesline drops Jordan. The Last Ride is broken up with a big boot so JBL is willing to come in, allowing Undertaker to grab a legbar. Jordan stomps away, making Cole think he could be champion one day. Thankfully a DDT cuts off that nonsense and it’s time for the double chokeslam, drawing a low blow from JBL for the DQ.

Rating: D. That’s only because it wasn’t as bad as the first match. This feud has been a disaster and this match didn’t do it any favors with a long, boring beatdown from Undertaker until HAHA LOW BLOW for the finish. You really can’t have Jordan take a chokeslam for the pin? His whole job is to take a beating and that can’t be the finish?

Post match Undertaker comes back and beats them up some more until the Bashams come in. The big beatdown leaves Undertaker laying to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. The Basham Brothers were the best thing about this show. The build to Armageddon is almost entirely based on the four way and the Tag Team Titles, meaning Kenzo and Dupree are one four of the pay per view build. Other than that, you have Angle vs. Show, which is fine but something we just recently covered. Dawn vs. Jackie is good for eye candy but I need something with a little more substance. The less said about Tough Enough the better.

Right now Smackdown feels like a classroom where the teacher put a movie on and hoped for the best. It might keep a few people quiet, but there is nothing for the majority of the people there. I’m sure it’s going to get better when the Rumble season starts, but until then we’re stuck with this no effort show and it’s making me long for the days of Maven being a focal point of Raw.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – November 25, 2019: Not Surviving The Winter Doesn’t Sound So Bad

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: November 25, 2004
Location: Blue Cross Arena, Rochester, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s Thanksgiving and that means we’re likely in for a heavily themed show. That’s rarely a good idea around here as WWE doesn’t have the best track record with these things. That being said, there are worse things they could do, like focus on Orlando Jordan vs. Josh Matthews again. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Vince McMahon narrates a video thanking the troops.

Opening sequence.

Joy Giovanni is setting the Thanksgiving table and happens to be leaning over quite a bit.

Here’s Torrie Wilson, tonight’s ring announcer, to wish us a happy Thanksgiving and hopes we saved room for dessert: Smackdown. With that bad line out of the way, she introduces the first match.

Rey Mysterio vs. Rene Dupree

Kenzo Suzuki and Rob Van Dam are barred from ringside. Dupree has a black eye coming in and the announcers try to figure where it came from. Maybe a match perhaps? Rey starts fast with the top rope wristdrag but the springboard crossbody is dropkicked out of the air. A guillotine legdrop misses, which is far better than jumping straight down with nothing in mind. Rey’s sitout bulldog gets two more but the 619 attempt is sidestepped for a crash to the floor. Rene’s bad luck continues with a posting and the springboard seated senton gets two. Now the 619 can connect, setting up the springboard legdrop for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was as generic of a match as you can get with both guys doing their regular stuff and getting out of there in a few minutes. You’re only going to get so much out of a match like this but since there are almost no other teams on the show, this is about all you can expect for a build towards the title match. They might as well bring out Van Dam and Suzuki for their match now.

In the back, Hiroko explains Thanksgiving to Kenzo Suzuki, who is too busy fawning over Torrie. Hiroko gets the point and leaves in a huff.

We recap last week’s Tough Enough competition.

Here are Al Snow and the Tough Enough competitors for this week’s shenanigans. Ryan Reeves has two broken ribs but he isn’t quitting. This week’s elimination: Daniel Rodimer, who would bounce around developmental for a long time as a Stephanie McMahon project that never worked out. Tonight it’s arm wrestling with Mizanin having to compete right handed to make it even less fair. Puder beats Mizanin in about a second and Reeves beats Smith, albeit with some more effort. After Smith and Mizanin give their predictions, Puder actually beats Reeves without much trouble.

Eddie and Booker T. are ready for their tag match tonight against JBL and Orlando Jordan. Amy Weber comes in and offers her services as an image consultant, which manages to drive a wedge between them over who will be winning the upcoming title match. Booker talks about Eddie already getting his rematch but Eddie explains why those weren’t fair. Eddie talks about Booker being a five time WCW World Champion and it turns into an argument over family. Amy breaks it up by saying they’re forgetting about Undertaker. Eddie says he doesn’t forget anything and leaves angry.

As we transition to the announcers, we get a CGI version of JBL’s entrance….with JBL as a turkey in the limo. These have been going on throughout the night and they’re as bizarre as they sound.

We recap John Cena winning the US Title from Carlito last week and getting attacked by Jesus after. His kidney is messed up pretty badly.

Carlito and Jesus brag about the injury with Carlito saying Jesus took care of Cena. They still have the chain that injured the kidney last week, which was like a drive by. Jesus says he showed Cena what it was like to be from the streets and if Cena ever comes back, he’ll do it again anywhere Cena wants. Carlito spits apple at the camera.

Rey and RVD alternate between Spanish and English about Rob vs. Suzuki.

Rob Van Dam vs. Kenzo Suzuki

Rey and Rene are barred this time. Rob starts fast with the kicks to the face but gets crotched on top to cut off the momentum. A running clothesline gives Kenzo two as the announcers talk about Japanese Thanksgiving. Kenzo drops a running knee, which Cole describes as “well that was a knee to the nose”, because he’s good at explaining the obvious. Rob fights up with a kick to the face, followed by a springboard kick to the face for good measure. Rolling Thunder connects to set up the Five Star but Hiroko gets in the way. She also hands over her sash, which Kenzo uses to choke Van Dam for the DQ.

Rating: D. So the solution to the boring Tag Team Champions is to have them wrestle two bad matches. They can’t drop the titles soon enough as this has been a terrible reign between two guys who couldn’t get a strong reaction if their lives depended on it. Kenzo going after Torrie isn’t going to work either, though at least it seems that they’re moving towards the team dropping the title.

Post match Hiroko goes after Torrie to set up a catfight with Kenzo breaking it up and gyrating in front of Torrie. Rob kicks him in the face.

Joy has put all the food in the ring with Josh Matthews hosting Big Show’s Thanksgiving. Show is happy to celebrate his favorite holiday and says he’s glad to celebrate with the greatest announce team of all time. Well he would if this was Monday and Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler were here. Show plugs the Rise and Fall of ECW DVD before asking Tazz not to have a flashback and suplex him through the pumpkin pie. Fans: “ECW! ECW!” Show: “You should buy the DVD!”

Show talks about eating a bunch of food when he was a kid, to the point where his dad put a lock on the refrigerator. Then one Thanksgiving his sister brought her boyfriend over. That wasn’t working for Show, so he waited until no one was looking, knocked him out with a turkey, tied him up and threw him into the neighbor’s yard. He told the sister that the boyfriend went home so she went after him, meaning more food for Show.

Now it’s on to all the food he liked to eat, including the cranberry sauce that better be shaped like a can. He calls Cole, Tazz, Tony Chimmel and the production staff to the ring to eat because it’s time to share the wealth. Everyone goes to eat but here’s Luther Reigns to interrupt. Reigns talks about never having a Thanksgiving because he was always in prison.

These people talk about not having enough to eat but he spent his time trying to stay alive. Reigns gets in the ring and makes Joy put him some food together, earning herself a pie to the face. Show sends him into the food and Reigns bails, leaving everyone else to get in a food fight. Joy pies Show to make things even.

I remember watching this live and the same thing stood out to me nearly fifteen years ago: Show sounded natural. This wasn’t scripted and was pretty obviously him being told “go talk about Thanksgiving for a few minutes.” Show is a good talker so it’s not like there was any danger there. Why that isn’t done today is one of the great mysteries of modern WWE.

The announcers are covered in food.

Here’s Kurt Angle, with armed security, for a chat. Angle is thankful for this holiday but not as thankful as the fans are for him starting the Kurt Angle Invitational. The security holds up the Gold Medal and tonight it’s time for someone else to get a shot at it.

Kurt Angle vs. Cody Steele

The fans chant what sounds like LIAR when Cody says he’s from Rochester. Angle even volunteers to drop down to all fours so Cody can have an early advantage. The reversal takes all of five seconds and Angle hits him in the face. That means a breather for Steele, who agrees to go down as well because he doesn’t seem that bright. Of course Angle kicks him in the face and it’s the Angle Slam into the ankle lock for the fast tap.

Angle gets in a little more ankle cranking for a bonus.

The remaining Tough Enough participants get twenty seconds each to tell us what they’re thankful for.

Mizanin is glad to be here, for the Mizfits who vote for him and for not being Daniel Puder.

Reeves is thankful for food and family. He does a survey asking who the people are here to see and Snow has to take the mic away from him for taking too long.

Smith thanks God, friends, family and the fans.

Puder says just about the same thing as Smith while promising to win. His three favorite words are Snap Crackle and Pop and he’ll show us what that means soon.

We look back at Heidenreich breaking down last week.

Paul Heyman talks about Heidenreich being under round the clock supervision and on medication. He knows a different side of Heidenreich, who is a very sensitive man. Heyman actually bows his head in prayer for him. I’ll give WWE this: they’re trying everything they can with Heidenreich, even if he’s that terrible.

Jackie Gayda and Michelle McCool are stretching for obvious reasons when Charlie Haas comes in. Michelle leaves and Charlie likes Jackie’s pilgrim outfit. Jackie is ready to rip Dawn Marie’s costume off and then her head is coming with it. That makes Charlie happy and he doesn’t like the rumors of him cheating on her with Dawn Marie. Kissing ensues. That’s better than Charlie talking again.

Dawn Marie vs. Jackie Gayda

Indian vs. Pilgrim. Catfight, referee shoved, done in thirty seconds.

Post match Charlie tries to break it up and pulls Dawn off. It says a lot when a story about two gorgeous women fighting in small outfits is this uninteresting.

Booker T./Eddie Guerrero vs. John Bradshaw Layfield/Orlando Jordan

JBL and Eddie start by throwing the towel at each other until Eddie snaps off some armdrags. Booker comes in and side slams Jordan for two because Jordan is really not very good. A JBL cheap shot from the apron lets Jordan take Booker down and we hit the chinlock. It’s back to JBL for an elbow to the face and some elbow drops get two.

Jordan grabs another chinlock as Cole thinks the fans are split on who they want as champion. As long as it’s not JBL that is. Booker gets up pretty easily and makes the hot tag off to Eddie so house can be cleaned. Three Amigos keep JBL in trouble and everything breaks down. JBL powerbombs Eddie out of the corner and boots Booker in the face.

Booker pops up for the ax kick but a fan in a Rey Mysterio mask decks Booker in the jaw. There’s something hilarious about the smartened up security guard sitting there with his arms crossed as a fake fan attacks a wrestler. So much for suspension of disbelief. It’s Danny Basham, followed by another “fan” (Cole: “Now who could this be?” I’m guessing the other fan helping Danny Basham is…..Funaki probably.) shoving Eddie off the top. That would be Doug Basham, who smiles as the Clothesline From JBL finishes Eddie.

Rating: D. Believe it or not, Jordan was in fact able to bring down a pair of Hall of Famers and JBL, who should be in there too. There’s no way to believe that he’s a threat to these two and yet he’s in there week after week for reasons I still don’t understand. It’s another bad match to close out the show, which really doesn’t surprise me.

Post match Undertaker comes out to crush JBL, leaving the Bashams as an afterthought to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. I’ve had to say this a lot lately but I feel so sorry for the fans who bought tickets to this. Quick matches from the Tag Team Title feud, an Angle squash, a thirty second match between Dawn and Jackie, a food fight and a thirty second long arm wrestling tournament from people fighting for a chance to train in developmental. Then their big main event: an Orlando Jordan match. If I paid money for this show, I wouldn’t be coming back and that’s been the case for a few weeks now.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – November 11, 2004: Do They Hate Their Own Main Event That Much?

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: November 11, 2004
Location: American Bank Arena, Corpus Christi, Texas
Commentators: Tazz, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for Survivor Series and hopefully this show is a little more inspiring than Monday’s efforts. Survivor Series isn’t looking like the most thrilling show in the world but under the right circumstances, Smackdown’s half could be a little bit better. Hopefully this week features a little less Tough Enough, but I don’t think we’ll be that lucky. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

As promised last week, we open with the Tough Enough guys waiting for the Torrie Wilson Sex Test. Two women from the Tonight Show are here to call the action, but first Al Snow needs to give Chris Nawrocki a chance to quit due to having a broken rib. He says no so it’s time to announce the first cut: Nick Mitchell, who was dressed as a cowboy for the Sex Test, complete with the pockets cut out of the back of his jeans with nothing underneath.

With that out of the way, here’s Torrie with a riding crop. Mizanin, in a Santa hat and Santa boxer shorts, holds the ropes open for her. Each one of them has fifteen seconds to make out with a WWE Diva, who will then pick the winner for a very special surprise. Torrie brings out Dawn Marie (in very little clothing) as I hope people aren’t falling for this so far. And yeah, Torrie brings out Mae Young for the least surprising surprise ever.

Puder goes first and gets pulled down as the Tonight Show women offer absolutely nothing. Mae jumps into Justice’s arms and gets spanked, sending Tazz into hysterics. Rodimer wants a peck and gets taken down to the mat. Reeves gets the same but winds up on top of Mae.

Mizanin has condoms and gets on the mat as well, where he spanks Mae a bit. She chokes him for an image I never needed to see. Nawrocki goes last and lays down slowly with Mae kind of laying on him. Puder wins and gets a lap dance from Mae. In case you didn’t get the joke clearly enough earlier. This took over fifteen minutes for the same Mae Young joke over and over and over.

Chavo Guerrero yells at his old friend when Rey Mysterio comes in. It’s nothing to worry about.

Spike Dudley/Billy Kidman vs. Chavo Guerrero/Rey Mysterio

Kidman offers an early distraction so Spike can jump Chavo to start. That doesn’t go well for Spike as it’s already off to Rey for the quick legdrop. Spike sends him into the corner though and it’s off to Kidman for the first time. The top rope hurricanrana takes Kidman down and Chavo comes in for the long awaited revenge.

Spike cuts him off though and the heels take over on Chavo this time. A whip into the barricade sets up a chinlock with a knee in Chavo’s back as the pace slows. Back up and Kidman clotheslines Spike by mistake, allowing Chavo to suplex Kidman onto him. The hot tag brings in Rey and it’s a springboard seated senton to Chavo. The basement dropkick hits Spike as everything breaks down. Chavo dives onto Kidman and it’s the springboard splash to give Rey the pin on Spike.

Rating: C. Pretty run of the mill match here as it’s all but guaranteed that Mysterio isn’t winning the title on Sunday. Spike isn’t exactly inspiring as champion but it’s not like there are any other fresh options at the moment. We’ve seen Rey and Chavo with the title so many times now and it’s becoming more and more clear that this division doesn’t offer much at all.

Orlando Jordan comes up to Josh Matthews to offer an apology. Josh looks scared as Jordan talks about not taking him seriously, even though Josh was a Tough Enough finalist. Jordan has to make him shake his hand and slaps Josh for the lack of respect. My goodness we’re still going with this?

Post break Booker T. brings the bloody Josh to Theodore Long’s office where Josh says he wants Jordan tonight. Oh and he wants Booker in his corner too. The match is made.

Team Guerrero is ready for their matches tonight, even though Eddie doesn’t have a fourth member yet. Eddie looks a little nervous but he’s fine in Texas.

Raw Rebound.

Orlando Jordan vs. Josh Matthews

Cole: “I can’t believe this is happening.” Preach it brother. Jordan is as cocky as he should be and puts an attacking Josh on top without much effort. A high crossbody is blocked as well so Josh scores with a dropkick to the back for some more luck. Some rollups get two each and it’s time to head outside for the four way staredown.

Back in and JBL trips Josh as the referee yells at Booker, sending Cole completely over the edge. The chinlock doesn’t last long but we stop so Booker can superkick JBL. Now the high crossbody gives Josh two as JBL gets up on the apron. That’s enough of a distraction so Josh can hit Jordan low, setting up Booker’s ax kick for the pin.

Rating: D-. What is this supposed to accomplish? Booker is costing JBL’s loser lackey matches to a commentator. How does that make me want to see the title match any more? The match was terrible because Jordan is awful and Josh isn’t a wrestler. What were they expecting from this one? At least it wasn’t all that long.

Mark Jindrak/Luther Reigns vs. Eddie Guerrero/Rob Van Dam

Hold on though as here are Carlito and Jesus to do commentary. Jindrak kicks Van Dam in the corner to start and the split legged moonsault misses. It’s off to Reigns for stomps in the same corner and this one goes a little better for Rob, with a few kicks putting Reigns down for a change. Eddie comes in with the slingshot hilo to take over but a Jindrak distraction breaks up the Three Amigos.

Back from a break so abrupt that Cole can’t finish his “this match will continue” with Carlito having spat apple on him. Eddie fights out of a chinlock and nails a flapjack but stops to yell at Carlito. Reigns uses the distraction to jump Van Dam and the villains take over again. The chinlock goes on before Jindrak and Reigns take turns stomping.

Rob slips out of a powerslam and brings in Eddie for the headscissors to Jindrak. Everything breaks down and Eddie hits Three Amigos on Reigns as Rolling Thunder hits Jindrak. Carlito gets dropkicked off the apron but Rob misses a dive. With the referee distracted, Eddie hits the apron with a chair and throws it to Jesus so Carlito and Jesus are gone. Back in and stereo frog splashes give Eddie and Rob the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine and played up the idea that Team Eddie is in a bit of trouble due to being down a member. Then again, is it really any secret about who the last member is going to be? And are Jindrak and Reigns combined equal to any member of Team Eddie? This is a pretty one sided match on paper and watching Eddie and Rob vs. two goons wasn’t the most inspiring build.

Post match Eddie announces the pretty obvious: John Cena is the fourth member of the team.

Post break Carlito yells at Long about what happened but Theodore doesn’t want to hear it because Jesus was in the same club that night. Cena is going to be in the ring at Survivor Series and Carlito has to get over it.

Recap of the Tough Enough shenanigans earlier tonight.

How to vote for the Tough Enough guys.

JBL rants about getting out of Texas because he wanted a better life. The only reason Booker T. was the WCW World Champion was because JBL wasn’t in WCW. JBL isn’t losing and if by some miracle he does, he’s out of WWE. He lists off everything that he’s gone through as champion and isn’t losing on Sunday. Instead, he’ll be putting Booker through more than Booker ever thought possible because that’s what JBL does. Having JBL do the big promo for the title match probably isn’t the right idea.

We look back at Heidenreich attacking Jackie Gayda and Charlie Haas last week.

Here’s Paul Heyman to yell at Michael Cole, calling him a JR wannabe. Tazz is tired of this and takes the glasses off as Heidenreich is in the ring. There go the lights though and it’s Undertaker staring Heidenreich down…until Heyman breaks it up. Undertaker looks bored staring at Heidenreich and it’s not like you can blame him.

Survivor Series rundown.

Big Show vs. Kurt Angle

Team Angle is out with Kurt, who says that Team Eddie has no chance because no one ca beat him. Team Eddie comes out to even things up and we take a break. Back with Angle not wanting to get in the ring until Jindrak offers a distraction. The cheap shot from behind doesn’t work so Show blasts Angle in the chest with the chops.

Another distraction also fails, with Angle going back first into the post. Back in and Angle gets in a shot to the knee to set up a choke but everyone gets in a brawl on the floor. Team Angle gets the better of it as the ankle lock goes on. Show breaks it up and grabs the chokeslam, drawing in Jindrak and Reigns for the DQ.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing, though it was nice of them to not wait around very long before the big brawl between everyone on the floor. You know that’s where they’re going so why bother with anything more than they had to? Show vs. Angle is fine enough for something like this and Show continues to look good since his return.

Post match Angle goes for the ankle again and might have broken it to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. I don’t know if it’s the lack of Maven or the lack of a not very interesting stipulation, but the Smackdown Survivor Series match is a lot more interesting than the Raw version. Yeah it’s pretty one sided on paper, but at least they’re having a more interesting build.

The rest of the show wasn’t all that great and the JBL vs. Booker feud is more about Josh Matthews and Orlando Jordan than the World Title, but I want to see this half of Sunday’s show a lot more than the Raw half. Probably because what is being built up here is actually being blown off on Sunday instead of over the next month. Not a good show, but I want to see part of Survivor Series more than I did before, so points for that at least.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – United We Stand – Maybe They Should Fall Apart Instead

IMG Credit: Fite.TV

United We Stand
Date: April 4, 2019
Location: Rahway Recreation Center, Rahway, New Jersey
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis

It’s nice that Impact has finally realized that they should be running a show over Wrestlemania weekend. How that eluded them for so long isn’t clear but I think we can go with general reasons of “It’s Impact.” The main event here is Rob Van Dam(recently signed)/Sabu vs. the Lucha Bros in a match that isn’t likely to be as epic as the company expects. Let’s get to it.

Earlier today, Rob Van Dam showed up!

The opening video talks about how five companies (Impact, AAA, MLW, WrestlePro, MLW, Lucha Underground) are coming together for one show that shows what can happen when you unite.

Johnny Impact vs. Jake Crist vs. Dante Fox vs. Jack Evans vs. Pat Buck

Ultimate X (four structures with cables crossing over the ring and an X hanging in the middle) and the winner gets a future X-Division Title shot. Everyone goes to the floor to start with Johnny being smart enough to go straight for the X. Buck makes a save and handstands his way out of an RKO attempt, because Impact is known for his RKO’s. Austin comes back in and kicks Fox to the floor but gets pulled outside by Crist.

The camera misses a Crist dive and it’s Buck cutting Austin off and hiptossing him to the floor. Nearly everyone goes for a climb and the audio starts cutting in and out. Never change Impact. Fox pulls Impact off and Crist hits a superplex on Impact for a bonus. Buck gets pulled off and it’s a massive knockdown. Buck is up first but can’t get very far as the audio goes out again.

A Tower of Doom brings everyone down and Impact hits a spinning Razor’s Edge slam. Fox goes with a Coast to Coast instead of going up for the X and then hits an imploding moonsault. Austin one ups him with a dive OFF THE TOP OF THE STRUCTURE onto everyone for the huge knockdown. Back in and Buck spears Crist off the cables and Impact hits a Spanish Fly on Fox. Austin climbs up and hangs upside down, leaving Crist to hit a diving cutter. Impact uses the knockdown to pull down the X for the win at 13:01.

Rating: C+. It’s a bunch of people doing a bunch of dives and flips off a bunch of high structures. What else can you really expect here? Well perhaps not having the World Champion getting a title shot against the midcard champion? Impact vs. Swann should be a good match, though there might be better choices to pick from.

Moose yells at Eddie Edwards in the back and the audio is so bad that you can’t make out a word. Cage comes in and tells them to get on the same page. I’m sure you can figure out the story, but you should be able to hear the story as well.

Video on last year’s Impact vs. Lucha Underground show with varying levels of audio.

Team Impact vs. Team Lucha Underground

Impact: Brian Cage, Moose, Eddie Edwards

Lucha Underground: Drago, Daga, Marty the Moth Martinez, Aerostar

Impact is down 4-3 to start but there’s a replacement for….someone Impact isn’t exactly making clear. You know who the replacement is going to be. Who else could it be? OF COURSE IT’S TOMMY DREAMER BECAUSE IT’S ALWAYS TOMMY DREAMER!!! Eddie and Aerostar start things off with Aerostar snapping off a hurricanrana and Eddie rolling around into a standoff.

Marty and Tommy come in and it’s Martinez going to the ample gut. Drago comes in and snaps off most of a headscissors to Dreamer so it’s Cage coming in for a change of pace. Daga’s running headscissors just annoys Cage, who is right back with a backbreaker to take over. Moose and Cage get in an argument though and Daga takes over with some shots to Moose’s knees.

Cage comes back in to clear out most of the luchadors until Daga and Drago combine to kick him in the face. Everyone gets set outside for the dives and it’s Dreamer teasing a dive before going outside for more punching. He doesn’t dive because he’s old and fat you see. Dreamer spits water at them and we settle back down to Aerostar getting two off a cutter to Eddie.

Drago and Daga start taking turns on Eddie until he dropkicks Daga in the face. The tag brings Cage in and the power goes up in a hurry. Everything breaks down (you knew that was coming) and we go to the parade of secondary finishers. Cage loads up Daga for the F5 but Moose spears his partner, leaving Dreamer to cane Moose in the head. Marty’s double arm DDT finishes Dreamer at 10:22.

Rating: C-. Much like the opener, what are you expecting here? This was a bunch of people in one match, getting in as much stuff as they could at once. Dreamer taking the fall was a relief, but more than that I’m rather sad to see Lucha Underground being such an afterthought. The show is done and it’s sad that they’re trying to throw themselves out here like this with nothing to go on to next. At least they won though. That’s something right?

Taya Valkyrie is in a four way tonight but just like Johnny Impact, she’ll overcome the odds and win.

Knockouts Title: Rosemary vs. Jordynne Grace vs. Katie Forbes vs. Taya Valkyrie

Taya is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Forbes dances and gyrates a lot with very big hair. Everyone goes after Rosemary, which is kind of a weird choice when Grace is right there. We go to the early exchange of rollups that have no chance of working and no one buys them as real near falls. Taya kicks at Katie in the corner and hits a running hip attack. Rosemary comes back in and shouts Taya down but Grace sends Rosemary shoulder first into the post.

A Vader Bomb gets two and a spinning Samoan drop plants Rosemary again. Forbes comes in with a bicycle kick for two on Grace but a collision puts all four down. Rosemary does her upside down triangle choke on Grace until Katie breaks it up. Grace’s missile dropkicks takes down Katie and Taya and it’s Grace slamming everyone in sight. Rosemary spears Taya but here’s Su Yung to draw Rosemary up the ramp. Forbes manages to fireman’s carry Grace for some squats but gets reversed into the Grace Driver. Not that it matters as Taya runs over and steals the pin to retain at 9:00.

Rating: D. They really missed here as there was no flow or structure to the match with a bunch of spots coming one after another. Taya stealing the win isn’t surprising as this isn’t going to be the kind of show where anything significant is going to happen. Not a good match and it really didn’t work, mainly due to trying to do too much.

Tessa Blanchard isn’t interested in what is between Joey Ryan’s legs.

Konnan is tired of disrespect from Low Ki and Ricky Martinez.

Low Ki/Ricky Martinez vs. LAX

It’s interesting how much less I care about Low Ki and Martinez without Salina de la Renta. Konnan is here with LAX though. Low Ki is back in the Hitman attire, which still doesn’t work. Ortiz and Martinez start things off and there’s no contact in the first minute. Make that two minutes and it’s off to Low Ki before anything happens. Santana and Low Ki finally lock up…and do it again…and a third time as they’re not exactly cranking up the work here. Ki puts on an armbreaker over the ropes to get in the first significant offense but everything breaks down for a standoff.

Martinez kicks Ortiz in the head at the five minute mark but a northern lights suplex gives Ortiz two. An assisted sitout flapjack plants Martinez for two but it’s Ki coming in off a blind tag to take over. Martinez comes back in for the Madison Rayne face thrusts into the mat and it’s Ki cranking on the neck. Santana finally avoids a charge and it’s off to Ortiz as the pace picks up.

A middle rope dropkick sends Ki down as the camera keeps cutting so much that it’s hard to get a clear shot of some of these moves. Martinez gets caught in the corner for a superkick into a Tower of London but Ki dives off the top for the save. Ortiz gets caught in an electric chair with Ki adding a Disaster Kick for a near fall of their own. Santana posts Ki though and a Death Valley Driver finishes Martinez at 12:38.

Rating: C-. Ki and Martinez weren’t exactly on fire here and as great as LAX are, they can only do so much. It’s not like the match is terrible or anything close to it, but it’s also not something I ever got into. The lack of Salina really does lower the interest levels in Martinez and Ki, but it could have been a lot worse.

Sami Callihan is ready to show Jimmy Havoc what Ohio violence is all about.

Tessa Blanchard vs. Joey Ryan

Before the match, Joey does his lollipop and baby oil deals. Joey offers to let Tessa touch it but she flips him off instead. A waistlock doesn’t get Tessa anywhere as Joey tries to make her touch it. Hang on though as Joey shouts something….and I can barely hear it. Whatever Joey asked, he gets tossed across the ring by the chest hair instead. Magnum gives Tessa two but Joey sends her outside for a posting. The arm is banged up and Joey makes it worse by bending it around the barricade. Back in and the arm work continues as Ryan can do a standard enough match if he’s willing to try.

Tessa comes back with a hurricanrana to send him outside, setting up a suicide dive. Back in and Tessa gets two off a Cannonball but he’s right back with an arm trap suplex. The Fujiwara armbar goes on but Tessa is back up with a springboard tornado DDT. A German suplex, meaning Joey grabs her by the chest for a suplex, followed by Tessa grabbing his crotch for the flip, gets two. The lollipop from the trunks goes into Tessa’s mouth for the near fall out of the superkick but Tessa breaks up a superplex. Magnum finishes Ryan at 10:48.

Rating: D-. Nope. I don’t find it funny and it’s so out of place three days before a women’s match is going to main event Wrestlemania. Tessa winning is the only call they could make but Joey’s act is old and played out. He’s been doing that same stuff for a long time now and I roll my eyes every time I hear about it because I don’t find it entertaining. It didn’t fit here but he got it in anyway because….well what else was he going to do?

X-Division Title: Rich Swann vs. Flamita

Swann is defending and we get a handshake. An exchange of shoulders doesn’t work so Swann knocks him outside for the big flip dive. Back in and Swann’s stepover kick to the back of the head gets two and it’s time for the slow form stomping. Swann chops away in the corner but misses a charge and takes the 619 in the corner.

A missile dropkick sends Swann outside and it’s a Backstabber for two on the champ back inside. More kicks to Flamita’s head set up a missed Phoenix splash and Flamita grabs the Spanish Fly. A 450 gets two and Flamita is frustrated. He hammers away at the champ until a Lethal Injection cuts him off. Now the Phoenix splash retains the title at 7:46.

Rating: C. Quick yet entertaining match here and that’s about all you could have asked them to do. Both guys can do so much more but what else can you do given less than eight minutes? Swann has become one of the better talents around and you don’t really ever see him have bad matches. That’s a pretty good role to play and he does it very well.

Rob Van Dam and Sabu say (yes Sabu talks) that they’re Rob Van Dam and Sabu.

Jimmy Havoc vs. Sami Callihan

Monster’s Ball, meaning a street fight. They both bring weapons to the ring but Sami goes back to get some extras. You wouldn’t want to be unprepared. Jimmy pokes him in the eyes to start and it’s already time for a staple gun to Sami’s chest. Another staple to the crotch has Sami in trouble until he gets in a bell shot to the face. More weapons are thrown in and Jimmy is already bleeding.

The spit chop only hits the post but Sami’s hand is fine enough to run into….I have no idea actually as the camera missed it. Havoc stops for some water so Sami chairs him in the face and it’s time for a fight on the apron. Sami gets out of a piledriver and hits one of his own on the apron to really take over. Well as much as you’re going to take over in a hardcore match. Sami staples his way out of a sunset flip and then staples pieces of newspaper to different parts of Havoc.

Some frying pan shots to the head let Sami take a bow and we bust out the lemon juice into the open wound. Havoc gets caught in a trashcan and beaten with a chair but fights back anyway and manages to get the better of it. A paper cut to the mouth has Sami in trouble and it’s time to take off Sami’s shoes. That means another paper cut to the toes with actual salt being poured into the wound. A Death Valley Driver into the trashcan gets two and it’s time for the Legos. The Cactus Piledriver onto the Legos gives Sami one but another one onto some open chairs finishes Havoc at 13:51.

Rating: C-. Picture any hardcore match you’ve seen in recent years, though minute the barbed wire. I can only get so much into these things because there just isn’t much to the things. Both guys are best known for their violent stuff and when you see it so often, it kind of loses whatever impact it can have. As has been the case all night: it could have been worse, but it’s nothing that got my attention.

The announcers recap the show so far.

Rob Van Dam/Sabu vs. Lucha Bros

Non title and it’s anything goes. We start with CERO MIEDO vs. ROB VAN DAM so the fans deem it awesome before any contact is made. Sabu finally starts punching and we’re at a standoff after two minutes. They head outside and it makes a lot more sense to go with the brawling instead of making the mistake of trying to have a match. Sabu stumbles through the Arabian press and Rob hits the spinning legdrop for two.

Pentagon kicks them both down and Sabu gets kicked a second time to make it even worse. The wheelbarrow splash gets two on Rob and it’s already time for a table. Sabu gets in a DDT on Pentagon and the Bros are put on the table for the Five Star/top rope legdrop as they try to turn back the clock again. Fenix chairs Rob to the floor and it’s a double superkick into the spike Fear Factor for the pin at 8:05.

Rating: D. Well what else were you expecting here? Van Dam and Sabu are both up there in years (Sabu is the older of the two at 54) and you’re not going to get much else out of them. Their one big spot looked good enough but this was all about the Lucha Bros doing what they could to cover up the rest of the match. It was fine for a nice little nostalgia moment, and thankfully that’s really all it’s going to be.

The lights go out as they shake hands and pose to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. And that’s being generous. Between the production issues (audio cutting out earlier in the night, theme music being so loud you could barely hear commentary and the music cutting off instead of fading out), the lack of anything significant happening, most of the matches not being very good and the incredibly dim lighting that made it look like they were in the dark most of the night, it came off like a pretty amateurish show, which isn’t a good sign for a promotion as big (and old) as Impact. Not a disaster, but more pedestrian stuff that isn’t going to draw anyone back in.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – October 21, 2004: When Reality Was AWESOME

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: October 21, 2004
Location: MetroCentre, Rockford, Illinois
Commentators: Michael, Cole, Tazz

Maybe it’s having Taboo Tuesday dulling my brain for nearly three hours but last week’s show isn’t exactly standing out to me. I’m not sure what to expect here but Survivor Series is in about a month so the build is probably about to begin. Carlito is the US Champion and seems to be getting some traction while Kurt Angle vs. Big Show doesn’t seem to be finishing up anytime soon. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Torrie Wilson, basically in a swimsuit, as guest ring announcer.

Carlito Caribbean Cool vs. Rico

Non-title. Before the match, Carlito says the title looks good on him and he would look good on Torrie. She isn’t interested so he spits the apple on her, sending Torrie running off. The fans are behind Rico as he backdrops Carlito to start but Carlito’s swinging neckbreaker gets two. Rico has to fight out of the very early chinlock and there’s the first spank. A kick to the face staggers Carlito and another kick to the face makes things even worse. Not that it matters as Carlito is right back with an Overdrive (that Rocker Dropper into a neckbreaker) for the pin.

That would be Rico’s last match in WWE. I always liked the guy, but there was no way he was going to do anything with that gimmick. It’s a shame too as his time in OVW was outstanding and he could have been something if he was allowed to be taken seriously, but the character was death.

Cole and Tazz talk about John Cena’s injuries. He’s recovering and should be able to save his kidney.

Booker T. complains to Theodore Long about being put in a six man tag with Rob Van Dam and Rey Mysterio because he’s done with tag teaming. Long doesn’t want to hear it and doesn’t care what Booker does, as long as it’s out there in the ring. Tonight, Long needs him to represent gangster. True that.

Video on Billy Kidman injuring Chavo Guerrero and being upset that no one was there for him when he was depressed. Kidman has since snapped and become selfish, using the shooting star as a weapon on everyone he can.

Here’s the injured Guerrero for his return, which Cole hypes up as FIFTY FIVE days in the making. Less than two months isn’t exactly some epic return but Cole hadn’t learned subtlety yet (or ever actually). Cole: “Many people call Chavo the greatest cruiserweight in Smackdown history and it’s really hard to argue that point.” He also hasn’t learned much about Smackdown, Smackdown’s history, or cruiserweights. Chavo talks about the overwhelming support he received while he was sitting at home and he’s very grateful. He’s been excited to set foot in the ring again but here’s Kidman to interrupt.

They’re both victims in this thing because Kidman suffered too. The people made him into a monster over an accident and that’s a lot to go through. All that matters is that Chavo forgives him, though Chavo doesn’t seem to agree. Chavo says this isn’t ballet and talks about a friend who has stuck by him throughout the entire thing. They shake hands, but that friend wasn’t Kidman so Chavo beats him down. A running clothesline sends Kidman to the floor.

Paul Heyman comes in to see Heidenreich before his first match on Smackdown. Long wants to cancel the match but Heidenreich is having none of that. Apparently there are some safety concerns so Heidenreich has to come out in a straitjacket. Neither of them like the idea with Heyman saying it leaves him vulnerable to the Undertaker. Heidenreich is willing to wear it because he wants to fight. The jacket feels like sweet home.

Video of the Survivor Series press conference.

Heidenreich vs. Shannon Moore

Shannon is smart enough to go after Heidenreich while the jacket is still on but a headbutt knocks him right back down. Heidenreich throws him outside but Shannon comes back in with some forearms. A big boot and backbreaker have Moore in trouble again though and a swinging Boss Man Slam finishes him off.

Post match the jacket goes back on but Heidenreich isn’t done. He wants Undertaker and calls him out while defenseless. No one comes out so Heidenreich demands Heyman bring him.

Torrie complains about Carlito spitting apple on her when Kenzo Suzuki comes up to sing to her. Thankfully Long comes in to cut things off. This wasn’t on the Network version because laws about music are screwy.

Long strolls up to Carlito and asks about the spitting on Torrie. Carlito doesn’t even get a chance to answer before Long switches to accusing him of attacking Cena in the club. That’s not a cool tone and Carlito is going to talk to his lawyers before he answers.

Video on the European tour. The FBI being so over is a strange sight to see.

Orlando Jordan interrupts Booker’s jump rope session to ask about a meeting with JBL. Booker walks away.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Mark Jindrak

Luther Reigns is out with Jindrak. Eddie flips out of an early wristlock but gets caught in a headlock. One arm gets Jindrak out of a fight over a top wristlock as Cole and Tazz make short jokes about each other. Eddie finally gets smart and pulls him down by the hair to escape before hitting a pair of armdrags into a dropkick. We take a break and come back with Eddie headlocking him down, allowing the announcers to hype up the Tough Enough finalists being unveiled tonight.

Jindrak suplexes his way to freedom and we hit the chinlock. A backdrop gets two on Eddie and we’re already back in the chinlock. Eddie fights up and gets in a headscissors, setting up the Three Amigos, which actually connect for a change. The frog splash is broken up by Reigns, who gets kicked off the apron and ejected but the distraction lets Kurt Angle run in and slide Jindrak the ring bell. Now the splash hits the bell and Jindrak gets the cheap pin.

Rating: D+. You know, for someone who is billed as this amazing athlete with a record vertical leap (which I believe still stands in WWE today), Jindrak is a pretty basic wrestler. He’s huge and has a great physique, but he doesn’t exactly do anything that shows off his abilities. Here he used basic arm holds, a backdrop and some chinlocks. Any lower midcard guy can do that, which makes me wonder why they’re wasting that kind of natural ability.

Heyman comes in to see Long because Heidenreich would like a favor. Long: “Now this is going to be good.” Heidenreich wants a match with Undertaker at Survivor Series and Long makes the match without hesitation. That’s not it though as Long needs a signed contract. Heyman is fine with that and has power of attorney over Heidenreich so he’ll sign right now. It’s not so simple though as Long wants Heyman to get a contract signed….by Undertaker. Oh and have it by next week.

Booker comes in to see Rob Van Dam and Rey Mysterio, saying that while they’re a great team, he’s doing his own thing. He didn’t want any part of this six man tonight and wants them to stay out of his way. Booker leaves before they can say anything so Rob and Rey agree to watch each other’s back.

The announcers discuss the awesomeness of Tough Enough.

And now, the Tough Enough competition in Venice Beach, California. Various people talk about what a big chance this is, including a certain Mike Mizanin, in what I believe is his first appearance on WWE TV. A guy in tye dye named Brian Danovich talks about how he’s wanted to do this his entire life and gets a good amount of screen time.

First up is an obstacle course, then a weightlifting test and a 40 yard dash (on sand). After the physical tests, we’ll have a personality/charisma test. We see some highlights of the physical stuff with various people collapsing and vomiting. Believe it or not, Bill DeMott is right there yelling at everyone. Daniel Rodimer is very confident and seems to do well with the physical aspects. You can tell they see potential there. Big John Studd’s son is here as well and wants to do well to honor his father. Marty Wright is very intense and has face paint on. He’s thirty years old but is ready to prove himself because he wants a job from Vince.

Some of the guys got in the ring for some grappling and to show what they could do as far as charisma and entertainment. One guy agreed to run into the ocean without anything on. Danovich tried to impress them on the bench press and seemed to injure his chest. On the second day, it seems to be more of the same with an ex-NFL player collapsing and leaving, though he apologized for wasting everyone’s time. That’s impressive.

Danovich came back with a huge bruise on his arm (that has to be a torn muscle) and did the obstacle course with one arm, actually finishing the thing. He had a torn bicep and a torn pectoral and promised to get to the big time one day. Al Snow gave him a very nice speech…and then immediately cut him.

As he was leaving though, Johnny Ace said that because of that heart, WWE wanted to pay for his surgery and send him to OVW on a developmental deal (From what I can find, he kept getting hurt and never made it to the main roster, or even to a match as far as I can tell. He passed away in August 2018 from what seems like an overdose.). Miz gets a quick profile where he talks about how he sees being on the Real World as a detriment. He wanted to be a wrestler and actually proved that he was a good athlete in the tests.

Back to Wright, he admitted that he was actually forty years old and was cut for lying. He would debut for OVW about seven months later as the Boogeyman. Daniel Puder is a UFC fighter and admitted that his promo was terrible. On the second day he had the best time on the course and got a woman to get in the ring with him because he’s cute.

The eight finalists:

Daniel Puder

Ryan Reeves

Nick Mitchell

Mike Mizanin

Justice Smith

John Meyer

Chris Nawrocki

Daniel Rodimer

Everyone is really happy to have made the finals. This ran for nearly eighteen minutes and while it served well as a way to get to know some people, it was WAY too long to air on a regular TV show. Make it a half hour special somewhere but don’t spent a fifth of your air time on something like this. I’d also hope they didn’t air this live in the arena, though with a taped show there’s a good chance they didn’t. This was several steps above the Diva Search, which consisted of things like selling ice cream and dancing. It’s still not exactly the best idea in the world, but it makes for slightly less annoying TV.

JBL and Jordan come up to Booker in the back but he cuts them off and congratulates JBL for all of his success. As a fellow Texan, Booker thinks along a similar path and likes the idea of having a house boy. He’s just kidding, though Jordan doesn’t find it funny.

John Bradshaw Layfield/Kenzo Suzuki/Rene Dupree vs. Rob Van Dam/Rey Mysterio/Booker T.

This is billed as a Champions Showcase. Rob and Rene start things off and the announcers bring up last week’s scary German suplex to Dupree. They go to the mat this time for an early standoff before Rob tags Rey while going down from a sunset flip. That means a pair of dropkicks to both sides of Dupree but another blind tag brings Suzuki in. An enziguri sends him into the corner and it’s a Bronco Buster from Rey into a split legged moonsault from Rob.

It’s already back to Rey for a springboard seated senton and the springboard spinning crossbody gets two. A headscissors/headlock takeover has the tag champs down so JBL comes in for a fall away slam. That’s fine with Rob, who crossbodies both of them for a double knockdown as Booker watches from the apron. Rob dives onto Rene but Kenzo throws Rey’s feet at Booker to knock him to the floor.

Back from a break with JBL suplexing Rey and grabbing a sleeper, which is quite strange looking given the size difference. Rey gets out and hits a headscissors but Booker won’t tag, allowing JBL to drag Rey into the corner. Dupree comes in but the 619 is broken up with a kick to the back.

Everything breaks down and Van Dam misses an ax handle off the apron for a crash into the announcers’ table so Rey DDT’s Dupree. Booker finally gets the tag to face JBL and they smile at each other. Booker loads up Rey for the Clothesline From JBL but winds up kicking all three villains down. Rene and Kenzo are sent outside, leaving JBL to take the ax kick for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was as efficient as they could get with a nice story being told of Booker being in it for himself and then going exactly the way he should have gone. Booker is more than qualified for a run after the title and could get a good match out of JBL if everything goes right. You can see the obvious Tag Team Title match on a pay per view as well so it’s a well done job of knocking out two stories at once.

JBL looks terrified to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. What we got was good and you can see some seeds planted for Survivor Series, but egads that Tough Enough thing felt out of place. It’s way too long and while it gives me a lot more hope than the Diva Search did, I’m almost terrified to see what else we might have to sit through going forward. The rest of the show was the usual hit or miss, though the main event was good stuff and helps set up a lot going forward. Overall, not the worst, but that Tough Enough thing really hurt it. Oh and Heidenreich, who is still awful.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – October 14, 2004: What’s Happening To Me?

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: October 14, 2004
Location: Manchester Evening News Arena, Manchester, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the first ever Smackdown in England and we’re coming off a big surprise last week when the debuting Carlito Caribbean Cool won the US Title from John Cena. That wasn’t it though as Cena was attacked in a nightclub after the show, meaning he probably won’t be here tonight. However, we do get Hardcore Holly vs. JBL in a hardcore match for the World Title. That’s WWE’s gift to England: a Hardcore Holly title shot. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Teddy Long addresses the roster, including Rey Mysterio in a black suit, about Cena’s condition. Apparently he wanted this to be kept quiet, which makes me wonder why it was mentioned on Raw. Cena was stabbed in the kidney and it’s not clear when he will be back. The show must go on and now we need a #1 contender to the US Title. Therefore, it’s a battle royal later tonight for a shot later tonight. The roster is happy and leaves with Carlito coming in to say what happened to Cena was bound to happen sooner or later.

Opening sequence.

The color seems a bit more washed out for some reason. Must be a British thing.

Rob Van Dam vs. Rene Dupree

Dupree rants in French, which somehow gets Kenzo Suzuki ejected. I’m not sure I get the connection there. Van Dam starts fast and monkey flips Dupree out to the floor but misses a suicide dive. The chinlock doesn’t last long for Dupree as he switches to the French Tickler, earning himself a SCARY release German suplex with Van Dam dropping him on the back of the head. Thankfully Dupree can still walk and even knocks Rob down before going outside for a chair. Rob kicks him in the face though and hits the Five Star for a fast pin.

The announcers get serious to talk about Heidenreich going into the crowd and attacking fans last week. The only thing we see is a kid crying for an effective visual.

Theodore Long yells at Paul Heyman for Heidenreich’s actions and rants about being responsible for the fans’ safety. They’re just lucky that they didn’t get sued. Tonight, Heyman and Heidenreich are going to apologize and they better be sincere. If Undertaker comes out there, they can deal with it.

Charlie Haas vs. Billy Kidman

Haas has a bad knee and no Jackie due to a neck injury, both suffered at Kidman’s hands. Charlie chokes away in the corner to start so Kidman gets smart and kicks at the knee like any intelligent villain. The knee gets wrapped around the post so here’s Dawn Marie to check on Charlie. Kidman doesn’t mind and hits the shooting star onto the knee for the pin. Using that as a weapon is an interesting way to go and Kidman has gotten a lot better in short order.

Post match Charlie gets put on a stretcher as Dawn screams a lot.

Luther Reigns rubs oil on himself and hits on the Page 3 girls. If they’re lucky, they’ll see him in action after the show too. They’re already seeing someone tonight though and of course that’s Eddie Guerrero. Reigns calls that a mistake and isn’t happy. Oh and he lied: they’re not that hot.

JBL is annoyed at what Undertaker did to him at No Mercy and now he has to face Hardcore Holly tonight. He’s a technical wrestler like Mil Mascaras or Bret Hart instead of a brawler. Now he has to come over here and defend the title in front of these barbaric fans. No one cares about England anyway but if the country was getting an enema, he would start it right here in Manchester. I’m sure Bret loved the comparison and stolen line in the same promo.

We look back at Cena losing the US Title last week.

Battle Royal

Kurt Angle, Luther Reigns, Mark Jindrak, Nunzio, Johnny Stamboli, Orlando Jordan, Billy Kidman, Rey Mysterio, Spike Dudley, Bubba Ray Dudley, D-Von Dudley, Rico, Scotty 2 Hotty, Rob Van Dam, Eddie Guerrero, Rene Dupree, Kenzo Suzuki, Funaki

The winner gets a US Title shot later tonight and I think I’ve got everyone. The fans are behind Eddie as everyone starts punching to start. Eddie backdrops Jordan out for the first elimination and Funaki follows him out thanks to Angle. Dupree and Suzuki throw Nunzio out but Dupree dumps Suzuki immediately thereafter. Stamboli and Spike go out next as the ring is cleared out a bit.

The remaining Dudleys get rid of Van Dam (pretty early elimination for him) as the fans are still behind Eddie. Rey gets rid of Bubba and D-Von at the same time and Rob runs back in to dive onto Bubba as we take a break. Back with no more eliminations and Eddie raking Reigns’ eyes to get out of a gorilla press attempt. Scotty hits the Worm on Kidman, which seems a good bit excessive and indeed, Angle uses the distraction to toss Scotty without much effort.

Rico slugs away at Dupree and then kisses him, sending Rene over the top to eliminate himself. Rey headscissors Kidman out and Jindrak tosses Rico. We’re down to Mysterio, Guerrero, Angle, Jindrak and Reigns for a solid handicap match. Eddie hurricanranas Jindrak out in a hurry but gets knocked out as well to leave us with three. Eddie isn’t done though and distracts Reigns, allowing Rey to dropkick him out. Angle slams him down hard but it’s too early to throw him out.

A headscissors gets Rey out of trouble but the ankle lock over the rope makes it even worse. Angle grabs a suplex and throws him over the ropes again but still can’t stomp him out. A springboard dropkick staggers Angle and there’s a tornado DDT for good measure. They fight up top with Rey crotching Angle but only being able to knock him to the apron. The 619 is blocked and the straps come down but Rey hurricanranas him to the apron. This time the 619 to the back is enough to give Rey the win and the title shot.

Rating: B-. They had a lot of potential with the final five but went straight to the final two instead. The good thing is those two worked very well together and the last stretch was good. Rey as the first challenger to Carlito is a nice choice and the match advanced some feuds at the same time. It was long but didn’t feel long, which is about as good as you can get for a match like this.

Post break Rey is proud of his win but Carlito comes up to interrupt. He wants the title match tonight (which I thought was already established), as long as Rey doesn’t mind wrestling twice in one night. Rey says it’s on and turns away like a moron, allowing Carlito to deck him and spit the apple.

Smackdown World Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Hardcore Holly

JBL is defending in a hardcore match and comes out in a Rolls-Royce. Holly goes with the dropkick to start and clotheslines the champ outside as it’s already time for the weapons. He takes a bit too long looking at them though and gets sent into the steps, leaving JBL to look at them too long as well. That means a street sign to the head over and over before sending JBL into the announcers’ table.

A monitor to the head doesn’t do much to Holly as he comes back with a cricket bat. For the third time so far, Holly takes too long to swing something and gets kicked in the face. The fans want tables but have to settle for Holly backdropping out of a piledriver attempt and trashcaning JBL in the head. The steps take too long though and a nasty chair to the head retains JBL’s title.

Rating: C+. These two have chemistry together and they were smart to keep this short. Holly isn’t going to be taken seriously as a challenger so they were smart to get in and get out with the hard weapons shots being the focus. It’s not like this was anything more than a way to kill time before JBL’s next challenger emerges but at least we got some far better than expected matches.

We see Heidenreich making the kid cry again.

British fans are glad to have Smackdown.

Here are Heyman and Heidenreich to apologize. Heyman gives a simple one and makes Heidenreich read one off a paper. That’s not it though as Heidenreich says he’s sorry for what happened last week, but not what he did to Undertaker at No Mercy. That was done with malice and intent and now, he wants Undertaker to bring the fight to him. With no Undertaker appearing, Heidenreich heads outside and threatens some people, including Heyman, before letting it go.

We look back at Eddie Guerrero cheating to beat Luther Reigns at No Mercy.

Chavo Guerrero is back next week.

US Title: Carlito Caribbean Cool vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is banged up and challenging. Feeling out process to start until Rey gets sent to the apron for a quick springboard seated senton. Carlito is back up with a shot to the ribs but gets knocked off the apron for a heck of a dive from Mysterio. Back from a break with Rey in an armbar (better than a chinlock) before being thrown face first out to the floor. The armbar goes on again but this time Rey fights up and hits a dropkick for his second escape.

Something close to la majistral gives Rey two and a tornado DDT is good for the same. Carlito gets back up and just throws Rey into the air for a crash before getting two off a flying armbar. A hammerlock slam stays on the arm but Carlito decides to go up for the rather obvious dive into raised boots. The 619 looks to set up the West Coast Pop, which is countered into a Fujiwara armbar. Rey finally makes a rope so Carlito rolls him up and grabs the rope for the pin to retain.

Rating: C+. I liked this way better than the Cena match last week as it had more of a focus and wasn’t just Carlito getting destroyed until he stole a win. The arm work was fine and Carlito cheating when he couldn’t win through normal means worked well. A win over Mysterio will help solidify Carlito, who needs to establish himself so soon out of the gate.

More Tough Enough contestants.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Luther Reigns

Eddie rides in with the Page 3 girls. Reigns isn’t happy and goes after him to start but gets dropkicked down for his efforts. That earns him a crotching and a belly to back suplex as Reigns is mad enough that he throws Eddie’s shirt to the floor. A few backbreakers keep Eddie in trouble with Reigns bending the back over his knee for some extra pain. Eddie dances up though and slugs away but the Third Amigo is blocked. Reigns’ swinging neckbreaker is countered as Eddie walks the ropes into something like a Sliced Bread #2 but an invading Jindrak breaks up the frog splash. Reigns throws him into the steps for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Not enough time here as they only had a few minutes before a DQ ending. That being said, Reigns is FAR better in the short form matches as he’s really not able to do much aside from the basics. Jindrak interfering to mess with Eddie is fine, though there’s still not much to care about with Jindrak so far. Has he actually won a match yet?

Post match the beatdown is on and here’s Angle with the clippers. Big Show makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a well paced show as they kept things moving and nothing felt like it was longer than it needed to be. They advanced some of the stories as well and while it’s a long way before we get to Survivor Series, there’s at least enough to keep me interested going forward. More than anything else, I’m surprised at how tolerable JBL has been as champion. Maybe the bad comes later, but so far it’s been acceptable. Granted that might change over time, but I can’t complain much about the recent months. Good show here, and one of the better ones in a few months.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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Smackdown – September 2, 2004: The Usual Saving Grace

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: September 2, 2004
Location: ARCO Arena, Sacramento, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

This feels like the big non-PPV month edition of the show with a huge main event in the form of Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle in a 2/3 falls match, which should blow off their feud once and for all. Other than that we have more between JBL and Undertaker, which is likely going to give us a title rematch at whatever the next pay per view is going to be. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video focuses on Angle vs. Guerrero, as it certainly should. It really has been a great rivalry.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Booker T. for a chat. Booker is sick of everyone going around chanting CENA no matter where he is. Last week he tied to score in the series and we get a clip of the second match. That wasn’t it though, as Booker won the third match over the weekend, only needing a pull of the jean shorts to take the lead. Booker rhymes a bit but here’s Rey Mysterio to cut him off, giving us a great bugged out eye look.

Rey thinks Booker must be sick of the John Cena chants and might prefer the 619 version. A fight is teased but here’s Kenzo Suzuki to interrupt. Kenzo says 619 is an American area code and since Rey isn’t from America, he is a liar, liar, pants on fire. That’s not cool with Suzuki, who is a real American with a smile like Tom Cruise. Rob Van Dam comes in and jumps Suzuki, only to have Rene Dupree jump him to keep things even. Theodore Long comes out to make a six man tag for right now.

Booker T./Kenzo Suzuki/Rene Dupree vs. Rey Mysterio/Rob Van Dam/John Cena

Booker is in street clothes. We’re joined in progress with Cena planting Suzuki but a Booker distraction breaks up the Shuffle. It’s enough to allow Booker to come in and hammer away before handing it off to Dupree. That’s fine with Cena who ax handles him down and brings in the fresh Van Dam. Dupree gets kicked down and it’s time for an early standoff.

Booker comes back in for some more success but, possibly not being so comfortable wrestling in business casual, hands it back to Dupree for a chinlock. The hold lasts as long as you would expect as it’s off to Rey for the springboard spinning crossbody. Rey breaks up the French Tickler and Van Dam comes back in as everything breaks down. A 619 into Dropping the Dime finishes Dupree.

Rating: C-. Kind of a bland match but it was a better idea than the same singles matches that we’re going to see time after time. The problem here though is the villains, as neither Dupree or Suzuki are even remotely intimidating or imposing. Neither is a threat to Mysterio or Van Dam, meaning these matches aren’t the most enthralling.

We see the ending of Angle vs. Guerrero at Wrestlemania.

Long comes up to Paul Heyman in the back and wants to see Heidenreich. That’s not possible as Heidenreich is behind a locked door due to public safety. Long can dig that, but Heyman is personally responsible for Heidenreich’s actions. After attacking Josh Matthews last week, Heidenreich is being fined $5000, which is Heyman’s responsibility. Oh and no checks, as Heyman isn’t the most reliable when it comes to money. Heyman: “Holla holla holla to you too Mr. Long.”

We look back at Billy Kidman hitting the shooting star press on Chavo Guerrero last week with his knee hitting Chavo’s head. In unseen footage from last week, we see Chavo being tended to by medics. He was unconscious for five minutes and very hazy for twenty more.

Jamie Noble comes up to Kidman in the back, saying Kidman should be gone after what happened last week. Kidman thinks Jamie sounds afraid and doesn’t exactly seem apologetic.

Carlito Caribbean Cool is coming and you better be cool.

Billy Kidman/Paul London vs. FBI

Non-title and it’s Nunzio and Johnny Stamboli for the Italians. During their entrances, the FBI talks about how they’re a bit weary of the shooting star as well. Nunzio’s advice: don’t play dead or you’ll be dead. London wastes no time in kicking Nunzio out to the floor but everything breaks down in a hurry. We settle down to Johnny backdropping London with ease as Tazz explains why Johnny is called the Bull. Something about him being strong.

The comeback doesn’t take long and the hot tag brings in Kidman, who is suddenly dangerous. A headscissors takes Nunzio down and a neckbreaker gets zero as Johnny makes one of the fastest saves of all time. Johnny gets knocked outside with London hitting a flip dive to the floor, leaving Kidman to dropkick Nunzio down. Kidman goes up…but has a crisis of confidence and can’t launch. Instead he climbs down and tags London back in, allowing Nunzio to grab a backslide for the pin.

Rating: D+. I can certainly appreciate turning something that happened organically into a storyline, but this is the second time the champs have lost a non-title match to a very low level team. The division is hardly deep in the first place and having your champions, who work well together, lose to teams like this is a bad idea, especially so frequently.

Post match Kidman isn’t sure what to do but here’s Heidenreich to beat up both champs. Just in case they had something left in the tank. The beatdown goes on for a long time with Heyman having to come in and calm things down.

Long sends a referee to get Heidenreich because the fines are increasing. Torrie Wilson comes in to say she’s nervous about Big Show coming back. Does anyone remember that story? Long says this is a different Big Show, because he’s attended anger management. As you might guess, Torrie isn’t convinced.

Orlando Jordan vs. Charlie Haas

JBL, now without the halo, because you heal faster after having one of those ripped off before you get beaten up, is out for commentary. Haas takes him down without much effort but the referee rather annoyingly walks between them, allowing Jordan to spear him down. Jordan unhooks a turnbuckle pad before going with a kick to Haas’ ribs. Haas ducks a high crossbody and gets caught in a high collar suplex for two. Jordan gets desperate and goes for the turnbuckle, sending Haas into the exposed steal. A neckbreaker (kind of a reverse Twist of Fate) finishes Haas.

Rating: D. You have to establish Jordan as the lackey but that wasn’t exactly the most thrilling way to do it. Then again, nothing about Jordan has ever been described as thrilling and that was on full display here. At some point, the lack of talent is going to catch up with you and that’s the case with Jordan. He’s just not very good and there’s no way around it.

Post match Jordan distracts the referee so JBL can hit the Clothesline.

Ivory, Linda McMahon and Big Show are at the Republican National Convention. Show could not look less interested if he tried in the most entertaining part of the night.

Dudley Boyz vs. Hardcore Holly/Billy Gunn

Spike is here with Bubba and D-Von and slaps Holly before the bell. It doesn’t seem to matter as Gunn shoulders D-Von down to take over early on. Bubba offers a trip though and D-Von nails a quick clothesline. Some elbow drops get two but Gunn gets in an elbow of his own, allowing the hot tag to Holly.

The crowd reaction is about what you would expect but Holly plows ahead anyway. Everything breaks down and Spike pulls D-Von out of the way of a charge. Bubba charges into an elbow in the corner and gets caught with a top rope bulldog, only to have Spike come in with a title shot to the head, giving Bubba the easy pin.

Rating: D. And that’s Gunn’s last match in WWE for over eight years. I know he got a very nice midcard push at one point, but how far can you go with a name and theme song of Mr. A**? The answer would be a lot higher than expected, but there’s only so much you can do with what he had. He certainly had a great career, especially in tag team wrestling, and the Hall of Fame induction is coming one day. I was never much of a fan though and watching him back after the Attitude Era hasn’t been a lot of fun. Gunn did well for himself, but he must have a headache from hitting that ceiling so hard.

Clip of the end of Guerrero vs. Angle from Summerslam.

Carlito is still coming. Nothing has changed in the last thirty five minutes. At least it’s a different vignette, but it doesn’t hide the fact that he’s a weaker version of Razor Ramon.

Raw Rebound.

Smackdown Throwback: Big Show and Brock Lesnar break the ring. I know it’s been done again since but that’s still an incredible sight.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle

2/3 falls. They go with the amateur grappling to start with Angle naturally getting the better of things. Eddie spins out of a front facelock and we get the first of what will likely be multiple standoffs. Angle goes with an armbar so Eddie picks the ankle for the break. The technical stuff continues with Angle grabbing a headlock, plus a handful of hair for a bonus. Back up and Eddie grabs a headlock but this time grabs the singlet to match the cheating move for move.

Angle isn’t happy so Eddie grabs it again to start setting in the frustration. He is however smart enough to take the singlet down, causing Cole to dub this a chess match. Tazz: “You take your clothes off when you play chess?” Angle gets his singlet pulled down and it’s time to take a breather as Eddie lays across the top rope. Back in and Eddie dances a bit before grabbing a waistlock, only to have Angle get in a clandestine low blow to take over. Eddie kicks him low right back, earning himself a DQ for the first fall.

We take a break and come back with Angle getting two off a suplex. Angle slaps on the waistlock until Eddie suplexes his way to freedom. You don’t suplex with Angle though as a belly to belly takes Eddie right back down for two. The chinlock goes on (with Angle ripping at the face like a villain should) for a bit before Angle rolls the German suplexes. The Angle Slam is loaded up but Eddie reverses into a rollup to tie things up in a hurry.

We take another break and come back with Eddie caught in another waistlock. Eddie snaps up and hits a hurricanrana but can’t follow up. Angle’s right hand just fires Eddie up and the comeback is on. The first Amigo is countered into a German suplex but the Angle Slam is countered into a DDT. Eddie goes up for the frog splash and of course it’s Angle running the corner for the belly to belly superplex.

Yet another German suplex is countered into a roll into the buckle, allowing Eddie to hit Three Amigos this time around. Cue Luther Reigns to distract Eddie from the frog splash though, allowing Angle to roll out of the way. Another Angle Slam sets up the ankle lock (first time in the match), which Eddie rolls through into a ref bump. Instead of doing the smart thing though, Eddie dives onto Reigns and grabs a chair.

Some weak shots abound, setting up Eddie laying down and throwing the chair to Angle. Naturally the referee sees it and yells as Eddie lays on his side and waves before dropping back down. That’s such an easy joke but Eddie makes it work. The referee keeps yelling so Reigns chairs Eddie in the knee, setting up the ankle lock for the tap.

Rating: B. It’s good and something close to a greatest hits collection, but it really didn’t hit the top gear that you might have expected. The match wasn’t quite a classic but what we got was very good. It looked rather crisp and it was so nice to have Angle hold out on the ankle lock until the end. Thirty minutes at this level is nothing to sneeze at and Eddie even has a door open for one more match if necessary. It’s a fitting end to the feud as they called back to previous matches and had a good match of their own right here.

Post match Reigns lays Eddie out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The main event is certainly good, but the rest of the show was a great example of how boring things can be around here right now. The tag division in particular looked awful and there isn’t much aside from Eddie vs. Angle and Booker vs. Cena, which isn’t enough to carry the show week to week. It’s enough this week, but I don’t think they can count on thirty minutes from Angle and Eddie every single time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Smackdown – August 12, 2004 (2019 Redo): Why Did They Never Do That Again?

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: August 12, 2004
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the go home show for Summerslam and things are mostly set for the pay per view. The big story (if you can call it that) coming out of last week’s show is Orlando Jordan joining forces with JBL, meaning it’s probably time for Jordan to die at Undertaker’s hands. Other than that we’ll be in for some last minute pushes towards the pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here are JBL and Orlando Jordan to open things up. After a quick look at the mini Undertaker and Jordan saving JBL last week, JBL paraphrases Richard Nixon by saying that he is not a midget. He’s certainly not intimidated by Undertaker though he’s certainly respectful of what Undertaker has done in WWE. JBL lists off a variety of names that Undertaker has defeated over his career but JBL isn’t on that list.

Undertaker may have few weaknesses, but JBL is going to exploit them at Summerslam. Championships are won in the ring, which is where JBL defies the odds. At Summerslam, JBL will not only remain WWE Champion but defeat the Undertaker. That brings him to Jordan, who is both a great American and JBL’s new Chief of Staff.

Jordan says JBL has taught him that you have to take something you want, which is why he stopped Undertaker last week. Not that JBL needed the help or anything. JBL compares Jordan to the troops overseas and announces that it’s Jordan vs. Undertaker tonight. They’re trying to hide the fact that Jordan is Jordan and it’s not really working.

Spike Dudley vs. Paul London

Non-title. The Dudleys vs. Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman/London is confirmed for Summerslam. Speaking of the Dudleys, they come out to start things off, complete with Bubba wearing a bandanna for an odd look. London gets sent outside early on and Kidman stares the Dudleys down to prevent violence. Back in and the Dudley Dog is blocked and London kicks him in the face for two. An enziguri drops Spike again but Ray breaks up the 450, allowing Spike to get a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D+. Short angle advancement here as the Dudleys win because of the numbers game. I’m still not sold on Spike as the evil boss but there are worse storylines to get upset about around here. London and Kidman still can’t get away from the Dudleys, which isn’t doing their title reign any favors. Not a terrible match, but it wasn’t exactly designed to be a great one.

Post match the Dudleys beat the champs down.

Cole and Tazz explain the main event, which is called a Summer Games Relay. It’s a six man tag, but the catch is the match is made up of five minute periods. One person each will start for five minutes, then there’s a coin toss. The winning team gets to send in a replacement for five minutes. After that is over, the team that lost the toss gets to send in their replacement for five minutes. They keep alternating every five minutes until there’s a fall. That doesn’t sound bad.

Heidenreich and Paul Heyman will be at Summerslam.

Scotty 2 Hotty asks what’s up with Spike. It’s simple: Spike has just come home to his family and it’s gotten him the Cruiserweight Title. So who needs friends? A slap to the face looks to set up a fight but Bubba and D-Von intervene.

Kurt Angle comes in to Theodore Long’s office to rant about Eddie Guerrero selling his stuff. Long says it was for charity and offers to let Angle call Eddie out tonight. But is Kurt man enough to go out there and do it? Angle says he is, so Teddy tells him to get to steppin.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Nunzio

Nunzio has Johnny the Bull with him. Chavo works on the arm to start but gets taken down into a front facelock. That’s broken up so a Johnny distraction lets Nunzio snap off a hurricanrana. Chavo is fine enough to hit a t-bone suplex but the Gory Bomb is reversed. A rollup with a grab of the ropes gives Chavo two as Johnny breaks it up. Nunzio grabs a rollup of his own for the pin, even though Chavo seemed to get his shoulder up. Nothing special but quite the random filler match.

Undertaker vs. Orlando Jordan

There’s smoke in the ring as a loud TAKER chant starts up. The arm cranking begins but Jordan shoulders away in the corner to break up Old School. Undertaker charges into a boot in the corner and Jordan stomps away. That’s pretty much it for Jordan’s offense as it’s a chokeslam to send him outside. Back in and Old School connects, setting up something like a DDT for two.

The required JBL distraction lets Jordan get in a low blow and a few right hands. Undertaker realizes how bad it looks to sell for this goof and throws Jordan outside again, only to get thrown into the steps. Back in again and the jumping clothesline sets up the running corner clothesline. Snake Eyes connects but JBL comes in for the DQ.

Rating: D-. There’s just no way around it: Jordan is terrible at just about everything he does and having Undertaker sell for him wasn’t a good idea. Undertaker is challenging for the World Title in three days and he’s in trouble against Jordan? There’s a reason that Jordan hasn’t been around in months and this showed just how bad he was. Really bad match and I don’t see it getting any better.

The villains bail and Undertaker sits up for the stare.

Here’s Long to talk about Angle vs. Guerrero at Summerslam. Angle and Guerrero come out with Eddie asking about Angle’s wheelchair and the missing Luther Reigns. Since Angle doesn’t have anywhere to hide, he has to say something to Eddie’s face. Angle says he doesn’t have to hide because he had a legitimate injury. Eddie has no idea what it’s like to have something taken from you like that, but Eddie says that’s what Angle did to him when he stole the WWE Championship.

Angle brings up Eddie stealing his stuff (Eddie: “That was for a good cause!”) and then showing that footage from Wrestlemania where Eddie stole a victory. It’s just a way of hiding the fact that Eddie has to cheat to beat him. Maybe it’s true that Eddie can’t beat him without cheating, maybe he can. That’s what we need to find out on Sunday because Angle can’t hide behind his General Manager position any longer. Maybe Angle doesn’t know if he can beat Eddie either.

Long cuts them off and says that in the spirit of competition, he wants to see a handshake, if they’re man enough that is. They shake hands rather aggressively to end a very good segment. This is a well told story with both guys having a reason to be here. They’ve built it up over several months and I want to see what’s going to be a great match. Sometimes it really is that simple.

Team Cena vs. Team Booker T.

Rob Van Dam, Charlie Haas, John Cena

Booker T., Luther Reigns, Rene Dupree

One fall to a finish with Van Dam and Booker starting. Why it’s not Captain Cena starting isn’t clear but maybe they want to save that showdown for the first of at least three matches at Summerslam. Team Booker already won the toss so they’ll get the first replacement after five minutes. The rules are a little complicated but it sounds fun. Before the match, Cena praises his teammates and likes Jackie’s eyes. Yes eyes.

Booker and Van Dam trade hammerlocks to start with Rob getting the better of an armbar. A hot shot gets Booker out of trouble and the hook kick to the face gets two. The armbar doesn’t get Booker very far so he chops away in the corner. Rob is right back with a loud kick to the head and the step over kick gets two more. There’s a jumping kick to the face and the Five Star but the first period expires, meaning Luther Reigns comes in before the pin. The beatdown is on and we take a break.

Back with Rob throwing some right hands and hitting the springboard kick to the face. Rolling Thunder gets two but Reigns catches him with a spinebuster to end the second period. That means Haas comes into tie Luther’s leg in the ropes and pull on it a bit. A quick crank of the leg and a takedown keeps the leg in trouble but Reigns is right up with a butterfly suplex. Haas gets clotheslined for two and a belly to back gets the same.

Back from another break with Rene working over a beaten down Haas. Rene takes a bit too long going up top though and gets dropkicked out of the air. That and a bridging German suplex give Haas two, followed by more suplexes for more two’s. Booker trips Haas from the floor though and Rene grabs an STF (which might be worse than Cena’s) until time expires. Cena comes in and, after checking on Haas, takes Rene down for some bad right hands to the head. A running neckbreaker out of the corner gets Dupree out of trouble and it’s off to a camel clutch.

Cena breaks up that and a regular chinlock but misses the flying shoulder. The French Tickler wastes some time, but Tazz does get to sing about it which is always a highlight. Another comeback includes the FU attempt but Dupree grabs the rope to kill off the rest of the time. Booker comes in again and hits the hooking kick to the face. A You Can’t See Me knee drop gets two and it’s off to the chinlock. Cena fights up and drops Booker to the floor, with Van Dam getting in a few shots. Tazz declares that not kosher, especially as Cena rolls Booker up for the pin.

Rating: C+. The wrestling wasn’t awesome here but they did have a unique idea and it was perfectly watchable throughout. Cena getting the pin ahead of Sunday is fine, even if that match doesn’t mean anything on that night. It was fun and different though, which is certainly better than watching some of the same stuff over and over again, which happens far too often.

A brawl ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. It’s a tale of two shows here with the main event working and the JBL/Orlando Jordan stuff being rather awful. There’s not much you can do to get around a lack of talent and WWE doesn’t seem to get that with Jordan. At least there was some other stuff to balance it out, but that’s not exactly enough to make this show work. Angle and Eddie were awesome and that helped a lot, but they couldn’t make up for the rest of the show being pretty lame.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – August 5, 2004: Oh Yeah He Exists

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: August 5, 2004
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re getting close to Summerslam and the big story around here is over the US Title with Booker T. winning the title in an eight way match last week. John Cena isn’t happy though and is still coming for Booker and the title, which you have to imagine will take place at Summerslam. Oh and Kurt Angle and Eddie Guerrero still hate each other. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

New General Manager Theodore Long opens the show with pictures of Vince McMahon and Martin Luther King Jr. in his office. One had a vision and the other had a dream but they’ve both made him want to make Smackdown a great show for the fans. If you thought last week’s show was great, you haven’t seen anything yet. Call your friends and knock on your neighbor’s door because we’re starting with a #1 contenders match.

John Cena vs. Rob Van Dam

The winner gets a shot at Booker at some point in the future. They trade waistlocks to start and that’s a clean break. Van Dam slips out of a headscissors of all things and that’s an early standoff. Another clean break gives us a handshake as the fans switch from Van Dam to Cena. Van Dam gets tossed outside where he kicks Cena in the head to take over. Cena is smart enough to get off the barricade before the spinning kick can connect. Now why has no one else ever thought of that?

They fight over a suplex on the apron with Cena suplexing him out to the floor for a nasty landing as we take a break. Back with Cena getting two off a release fisherman’s suplex but Van Dam kicks him in the head again. Another kick to the face keeps Cena in trouble as Booker is cheering both of them on in the back. The split legged moonsault gives Van Dam two and Rolling Thunder is good for the same.

Since it’s been a few minutes since we’ve seen one, Van Dam kicks him in the face and goes up top for….actually a guillotine legdrop instead of the Five Star. Cena grabs a DDT (Why did he stop using that?) for a delayed two of his own. One heck of an elbow to the jaw rocks Van Dam and the ProtoBomb plants him again.

The Shuffle gets two and Cena goes up, which isn’t likely to be a good idea. Indeed Van Dam kicks him in the head and grabs a superplex but Cena reverses into a small package for the pin (the stupid kind where they’re both laying down and then kick their legs up for no reason other than to get to the finish) and the title shot.

Rating: B-. Cena is looking more and more like the guy who could be the next star every time he’s out there. The comedy is starting to take a backseat to the good, quality matches and while this wasn’t a great one, it was solid with Cena helping Van Dam put on a nice performance. A feud with Booker is only going to help him.

We get a show of respect post match.

Long comes in to see Booker and says he and Cena are so equal that one match isn’t enough. There’s going to be a best of five series for the title with the first match taking place at “Summer Games”.

Here’s Eddie Guerrero for a chat, complete with Torrie Wilson, Sable and Dawn Marie in the low rider. All of Kurt Angle’s stuff that Eddie is auctioning off is in the ring and the auction ends tonight. That’s why the women are here: to help raise the value. This includes putting the cast on Torrie and having her sit in the wheelchair so the women can sign the cast. Then we have the signed photo of Angle but Eddie is staring at Sable instead.

The girls autograph that too before Eddie moves on to talking about Angle’s last match. That just happened to be against Eddie at Wrestlemania where Eddie pinned him in a classic. Eddie promises to win again and we see an Olympic themed commercial of Eddie gluing the other runners to their starting blocks to win a Gold Medal of his own.

Rene Dupree vs. Orlando Jordan

I had almost forgotten Jordan existed. Dupree knocks him outside and into the steps to start before throwing right hands inside. Jordan gets thrown to the apron so Dupree can hit the French Tickler. With the dancing done, Dupree turns around into a high crossbody to give Jordan the upset. Yay.

JBL arrives and asks Josh how he’s doing while using hand sanitizer after shaking hands. He’s not afraid of Undertaker you see and is calling him out tonight.

Kurt Angle vs. Charlie Haas

This is Angle’s first match since Wrestlemania with Luther Reigns and Miss Jackie here as well. Feeling out process to start as they trade takedowns and escapes. Angle hits a hiptoss and Haas is right back with an armdrag into an armbar. Another armdrag sends Angle bailing out to the floor and we take an early break.

Back with Haas grabbing a hammerlock but getting snapmared into a chinlock. With the wrestling not getting us very far, Angle starts hammering away in the corner to really take over. Haas grabs a suplex and hammers away in the corner but walks into the belly to belly. The chinlock with a knee in the back goes on before Angle gets frustrated at the repeated kickouts.

A bodyscissors keeps Haas down but he fights up and sends Angle outside for a breather. Back in and Angle goes shoulder first into the post, setting up a springboard twisting ax handle (the announcers are surprised too) to give Haas two. That’s enough for Angle as he picks the ankle but gets sent into the corner. Angle isn’t having that either and takes down the straps, setting up the grapevined ankle lock for the tap.

Rating: B-. This was a good return for Angle as he wasn’t as sharp as he used to be but started to put it together as the match went on. Haas was a smart choice here as Angle is better at everything that Haas can do but Haas can still make him work. Angle is going to get better and better with some more matches, capped off by the big one at Summerslam.

Summerslam rundown.

Raw Rebound.

Tag Team Titles: Basham Brothers vs. Billy Kidman/Paul London

Kidman and London are defending. Danny starts with Kidman but it’s quickly off to London for a double hiptoss. A slingshot legdrop keeps Danny in trouble but Doug pulls Kidman off the apron to take over. Kidman gets dropped ribs first onto the top rope to make things even worse and we hit the bearhug. A kick to the head gives Danny two but Kidman scores with a dropkick and dives over for the tag off to London. Everything breaks down and Kidman uses London’s back as a launchpad for an enziguri. The 450 retains the titles.

Rating: C. Now this is the kind of thing that the champs needed. They had a nice little title defense here against a known team and won clean. Build up the credibility a bit and the reign will feel a little more important. The Bashams are so much better without Shaniqua, as they’ve gone from a joke to an average team, which is quite the upgrade.

John Cena wants you to vote.

Paul Heyman/Heidenreich video.

Rey Mysterio/Spike Dudley vs. Dudley Boyz

A loud Bubba drives Spike into the corner to start and a dropkick to Bubba only hurts Spike’s knee. Rey comes in and Spike walks it off on the floor as you might see something coming here. Mysterio’s springboard moonsault has Bubba in trouble and D-Von charges into a boot in the corner. In a questionable move, Spike tags himself in and missile dropkicks D-Von, only to hurt the knee again.

The distraction lets Bubba gorilla press Rey onto D-Von’s raised knee to bang up the ribs. The bearhug doesn’t last long and Bubba/s big elbow draws a smile. D-Von dives into a raised boot and the springboard seated senton puts Bubba down. Rey has to fight both Dudleys off at the same time with D-Von breaking up the 619. The 3D finishes Mysterio with Spike not being able to get in for the save.

Rating: D+. Just a match here and there’s a good chance that its main purpose was to set up a post match angle. Mysterio losing to both Dudleys in a glorified handicap match is fine and it gets the Dudleys some momentum back, though I’m not sure how interesting a story built around Spike is going to be.

Post match Spike helps Rey up and then turns on him, celebrating with his brothers instead. Spike wants a table and puts Rey through one with a top rope double stomp, setting up villainous posing. Uh, ok. I’m not sure why I’m supposed to care about Spike Dudley as a big villain, but this is somewhat (I think) better than having the Dudleys as the top heels. At least there’s no attempted murder involved.

Here’s JBL in the ring to call out Undertaker. He used to be a Texan but now he’s so glad to have moved to New York City. Now that he’s returned, he was hoping for the hero’s welcome that he deserved but tonight is about business. That’s why he’s calling Undertaker out right here and right now instead of waiting for Summerslam. The gong sounds and, in one of the famous WWE tropes, it’s a mini Taker. Tazz finds it hilarious, calling him the Undertoddler. JBL: “You look a lot bigger on television.”

He gets on his knees to look Undertaker eye to eye and makes a bunch of short jokes before loading the mini Taker up for a Tombstone. The gong goes off again though and the real Undertaker appears. It’s a quick beatdown to set up a Tombstone but Orlando Jordan of all people runs in for the save. Undertaker poses and the mini version does the same, earning a chokeslam to end the show. There were some good lines from JBL but this was eye rolling WWE comedy at its “finest”.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was good here and they advanced some stories, there were a few things on here holding it back. The ending segment, along with Spike’s turn, aren’t exactly thrilling stuff and having Jordan be JBL’s lackey is far from interesting. I mean, there’s a reason that I had forgotten Jordan even existed until tonight. There’s some good stuff on here and enough to make the show easy to watch, which is about as you can ask for at times. Hopefully Summerslam is as good as the better half of the build has been, though it’s still not as strong as Raw at the moment.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – July 29, 2004: They’re Cool For The Summer

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: July 29, 2004
Location: US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

Things are picking up around here and that’s a good thing. Last week Vince McMahon reinstated Kurt Angle as a wrestler after Angle went nuts and fired a bunch of people. That set up Eddie Guerrero vs. Angle at Summerslam, but there’s a lot of stuff to get through tonight first. Tonight we have two title matches with the Cruiserweight and Tag Team Titles on the line. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Vince and Angle with Eddie coming out in the car to celebrate. Not noteworthy on its own, but Vince getting in the car and being scared by the bouncing was funny.

Opening sequence.

Tonight: a new General Manager made.

Cole clears up a point by saying Vince rehired everyone that Angle fired after the show went off the air last week. Simple, to the point, and fixes the whole thing in one sentence during an introduction. Learn from Michael Cole people.

Here’s Booker T., wearing the US Title, for a chat. Angle promised to make him the new US Champion but now Angle is gone, so the new boss needs to officially name him champion. Instead here are Kenzo Suzuki and Hiroko to interrupt. Booker says he doesn’t want to hear from someone in charge of the late night sushi bar at the Tokyo Inn. Kenzo rants a lot and Hiroko translates to “he should be US Champion.” Oh and Booker’s breath smells bad.

This brings out Rob Van Dam but before he can say anything, Luther Reigns cuts them off. Now it’s Rene Dupree as the ring is starting to fill up. Charlie Haas and Billy Gunn are next but John Cena comes out to the big reaction. Cena makes it clear that this is his house and the big fight is on. Before that goes very far though, here’s Vince McMahon to say this isn’t happening. It’s not his place to fix things though because that’s up to the new General Manager. Vince wants the new boss out here right now and it’s…..Theodore Long.

That’s enough for Vince as Long says we have eight men arguing like children over the US Title. Only one of them deserves to be the champion and that is….not revealed yet as Booker cuts him off to accept the title. Long says not so fast because tonight, it’s an eight way elimination match to crown the new champion. Holla.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Spike Dudley

Rey is defending and we’re ready to go after a handshake. Feeling out process to start as they both seem rather tentative. Rey grabs an armbar which seems to annoy Spike and it turns into a brawl, with both guys falling out to the floor. Back in and Rey hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two and it’s off to a double arm pull. Spike fights up and sends him hard into the corner to take over.

A headscissors sends Rey face first into the buckle but he’s fine enough to block a superplex attempt. Rey gets two off a basement dropkick but Spike sends him into the corner again, setting up a bulldog for two of his own. The top rope double stomp hits raised boots so Rey loads up the 619. Cue D-Von to distract the referee though and Bubba to trip Rey, setting up a springboard Dudley Dog to give Spike the pin and the title.

Rating: C. This didn’t have the time to get very far but what we had was good. Bubba and D-Von interfering comes off like a big storyline point and it’s not like Rey losing the title hurts him very much. He’s the most successful cruiserweight of all time and there isn’t much of a need to keep the title on him. Let the title build up someone else, like Spike for example.

Spike isn’t pleased with what his brothers did.

Raw Rebound.

In case you didn’t get it, bonus footage during the break shows that Spike isn’t pleased with what his brothers did.

We recap the Undertaker coming out last week to challenge JBL for Summerslam.

Long promises to make sure the women are utilized on Smackdown going forward. He heads into his office (an empty room aside from the desk) and finds Angle, who insists he isn’t hiding. Angle came here to get his stuff, but it’s already been packed. So wait. Angle was fired last week in Philadelphia but people came to Cincinnati and set up his stuff anyway?

With that leap in logic out of the way, Angle suggests the Long got the job because he’s black. Teddy: “You mean after all these years, it turns out that I’m black???” Long puts Angle in a match against an unspecified opponent for later. Angle isn’t happy so Long fines him for not bringing his gear. The match is moved to next week since Angle isn’t prepared.

Paul Heyman and Heidenreich are coming.

Tag Team Titles: Billy Kidman/Paul London vs. Dudley Boyz

The Dudleys are challenging. London armdrags and dropkicks D-Von for two to start. It’s off to Bubba and you can feel things getting a little more intense. A toss sends London into the corner so Kidman comes in instead. Bubba can’t quite get out of an armbar and some armdrags make things even worse. Everything breaks down for a bit until Bubba pulls Kidman down by the hair to take over. The Dudleys seem rather popular here as London gets sent to the floor, leaving Kidman in that much more trouble.

Back from a break with Kidman sunset flipping D-Von for two but getting caught in the neck crank. A quick knee to the head gets Kidman out of trouble and the hot tag brings London back in. D-Von gets kicked in the jaw for two and there’s a rolling version to Bubba’s head for a bonus. A double superplex brings D-Von back down for two but Bubba pulls Kidman to the floor. One heck of a clothesline gets two on London and Bubba grabs a chair, only to have Mysterio show up for a dropkick to drive it into Bubba’s face. Back inside and London small packages D-Von tor retain.

Rating: C. The ending made sense given the previous match so the storyline certainly fits. London and Kidman retaining the titles was the right call as, just like Mysterio, the Dudleys don’t need the titles and there’s no reason to give them back when you can build up some fresh people. It was good action too and that makes for a rather nice match as some new champions (who weren’t beaten when Rey got involved) get another good win.

Mick Foley and Ivory were at the Democratic National Convention.

Eddie Guerrero has something in the back of his rather great looking low rider. One thing he doesn’t have: a smudge on the car, which he cleans off and grins a lot.

Here’s Eddie for a chat. He enjoyed seeing Angle begging for his life last week but knows that’s nothing compared to what’s going to happen at Summerslam. If Angle wants, they can do this tonight. With no Angle, Eddie says to unload the car….which is all of the stuff from Angle’s office. He stole it if that wasn’t clear. Since Angle isn’t in charge anymore, let’s give this stuff to someone else.

That’s why he’s putting all of this stuff up for auction on WWE.com, with the proceeds going to charity. That includes a fake cast, a framed photo complete with WWE Championship (Eddie recommends putting it in the bathroom), a wheelchair primed for hydraulics and a photo of Angle….which gets a few bonus drawings from Eddie.

Now we get the big item: gold medals for sale. With the bidding up to a full dollar, Angle comes out to interrupt. He has a seat in the low rider but Eddie says there’s an anti-theft device included. Angle turns the key and powder sprays into his face. Eddie: “You think I was lying?” Eddie plays Angle’s music so the fans can get in some YOU SUCK’S.

Next week: Spike and Rey vs. the Dudleys.

On Velocity: JBL in action.

Speaking of JBL, here’s a video on why he’s an amazing American who deserves your support, including videos of him playing baseball as a kid. He was a great football player but wanted one on one competition so he became a wrestler. Oh and he’s a patriot, self made millionaire, and kisser of babies.

US Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Billy Gunn vs. Charlie Haas vs. Luther Reigns vs. Kenzo Suzuki vs. Booker T., vs. John Cena vs. Rene Dupree

The title is vacant coming in and this is under elimination rules. Thankfully there are only two in at a time so tags are required. Charlie and Rob start things off with Van Dam missing a kick and getting armdragged down. Back up and Rene pulls Van Dam by the hair before tagging himself in to pound Haas between the shoulders. Haas armbars him for a bit until a right hand puts him right back in trouble. The fans chant for Cena but the preliminaries aren’t quite over yet. Billy makes a quick blind tag and hits a Fameasser for the pin on Haas.

Back from a break with Dupree flapjacking Gunn for two and hitting some rather lame right hands. The French Tickler is broken up and Gunn hits a big backdrop before hammering away in the corner. Reigns comes in and hits hit swinging neckbreaker to get rid of Dupree and now it’s off to Cena for the big reaction. Cena hammers away in the corner but gets shoved away, setting up a butterfly suplex for two.

The chinlock goes on for a bit until Cena takes him to the floor for a whip into the steps. Hiroko distracts Cena so he kisses her and dances, earning a belt to the back from Suzuki. We’ll ignore the “pinfall and submission are the only ways to be eliminated” line from Cole at the beginning of the match because Suzuki is disqualified.

Back from another break with Booker kicking Cena in the face but getting punched into the corner. That’s enough for the latest tag to Gunn, who gets two off a fisherman’s suplex. The chinlock is countered into a belly to back suplex and Cena scores with a DDT. Billy grabs the One And Only for a very close two but walks into the FU for the elimination. Reigns comes in next and runs Cena over for two more. Stomping and a knee drop look to set up a powerslam but Cena slips out and another FU gets rid of Reigns.

We’re down to Cena, Van Dam and Booker, who comes in with a Book End for two on Cena. A DDT drops Booker but Rob tags himself in for some kicks to the ribs and a northern lights suplex for two more. Cena gets kicked in the face again and there’s the split legged moonsault for another near fall. This time it’s Booker tagging himself in though and, after a Five Star from Van Dam, he steals a pin on Cena. A quick rollup finishes Van Dam to make Booker champion.

Rating: C-. The match was longer than I would have liked, but at the same time I definitely prefer something like this over having Booker beat Cena by shenanigans in a singles match. You can almost guarantee Booker vs. Cena in a big time title match at Summerslam so why burn through it here? Cena lost clean by the rules here but it wasn’t in a singles match, so maybe he can win the title back later on. Today, this would have been Booker cheats to win, then Cena wins a rematch to get another title shot, then they have three matches in a row for the title. At least this keeps things a bit more fresh, which would be very welcome today.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling wasn’t the best here but the booking and storytelling made sense with a lot of stuff being set up for next week and beyond. Throw in JBL not actually appearing with the over the top vignette airing instead and this was a lot easier to watch. They’ve changed things for the better in recent weeks and I’ll certainly take that over the nightmares they were producing in the early summer.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6