Summerslam 1999
Date: August 22, 1999
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 17,130
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Well not much has changed since last year. Austin is still dominating the wrestling world, but he’d be injured very soon and get run over, leaving for a year. Tonight though, he’s facing the young stud known as HHH and Mankind in a triple threat for the belt. The only big change that’s happened is HHH and Rock have switched sides in the eternal struggle between heel and face.

Also, a lot of the Attitude Era favorites are here now, such as the APA, the hardcore title, the Big Show and Bully Gunn. Oh and Al Snow, but no one likes him. (Foley is my all time favorite. I couldn’t help it.) Angle has been there for about 4 months, Jericho has been there less than two weeks, debuting 13 days prior to this show, and Benoit and co. would show up at the end of January.

The big deal to this show is that there’s a special referee for the main event: the governor of the state of Minnesota, Jesse “The Body” Ventura!!!! This was huge at the time because he was in office at the time, so if nothing else it got a lot of mainstream publicity. Therefore, let’s get to this. Oh and one more thing: Smackdown would debut as a regular series four days after this.

We get a recap of guest referee history (coming soon to a history channel near YOU) which include Tyson and McMahon and McMahon Jr. HHH and Austin say they’ll beat up Jesse if they have to, but he says he has the power. Now we’re in the arena with a huge pyro show. Jesse is in the back with HHH and Chyna, saying that HHH has to follow the rules or he won’t be champion. We cut to Jericho from earlier today, waiting on someone. Harold Finkle comes running up and apologizes for being late.

IC/European Titles: D’Lo Brown vs. Jeff Jarrett

Yes, Brown has both titles. Jarrett comes out with Debra, who is in a bikini and a coat. He sends her back, much to the King’s dismay, but we see her with Brown who she accompanies to ringside instead. Ross tries to convince the people that the pop is for Brown and not Debra. Even I don’t buy that one Jimmy boy. They talk about Brown’s incredible weight loss as at one point he weighed over 400lbs, yet for this match he weighs in at about 250.

That really is not only impressive but should be applauded, if nothing else for the health aspect. Once again, the lady is the main focus of this match, or in this case her chest is. If her face wasn’t so unnatural looking, she’d be VERY hot instead of just having a huge chest. The match is short, yet interesting. We’re in the fast paced, more intense style that’s always fun. Here, Brown actually controls most of this, which isn’t something that you see very often actually.

Jarrett makes him look good, which is better because Jarrett would be gone within two months, heading back to WCW as a big name until they closed. Anyway, Debra gets on the apron, yet Jarrett grabs the guitar and yells at her. If he’s going to use the guitar and Debra is there, why not hit him while she has the referee? Anyway, Mark Henry runs out and helps Brown, only to nail him seconds later to give Jeff two titles. Debra wasn’t with Brown and it was a swerve, which is fine I guess. At least they didn’t’ try to make it something major.

Rating: B-. Solid opener here, with some nice intense stuff. Never been a fan of unified titles like this but I guess it’s ok. Debra was the big deal here, but unlike last year with Sable it was more subtle and it certainly wasn’t like having a big spotlight on her all night, which was a major plus. Not a great match, but good for an opener.

Edge and Christian say they’ll win the tag team turmoil match.

Tag Team Turmoil

I’ve always liked this idea. You have 6 teams. Two start and have a tag match. The losers are eliminated, and then the third team comes in. You keep going until there’s one team left. The winners get a tag title shot tomorrow night on Raw. Oh while Edge and Christian are coming out, JR is still upset about what Henry did, because D’lo was trying to help his career. My goodness what would he have been like had Brown not helped?

Anyway, we start with E/C and the New Brood, aka the Hardys, who are heels if you can believe that. The Dudleyz weren’t quite there yet, but very soon these three would start dominating the tag division as you already know. The match starts with a standard back and forth fast paced match. I’ll spare a lot of the details here as most of these are going to last about three minutes at most. It amazes me that you have these four guys and Matt is easily the least successful of them all.

Who would have believed that you have at least 13 world title reigns in there? That’s unbelievable. Anyway, we go to the floor and it gets insane. You can tell how much these four are loving this as they’re killing each other out there. When the Dudleys came in a few months or maybe even weeks, the ante would be upped even more, especially with the ladders becoming more prevalent. Anyway, Edge hits an electric chair followed by what I think is a diving elbow from Christian to eliminate the Hardys.

Out next are Mideon and Viscera. And here is where the match starts to become an issue with the time. This lasts all of two minutes so there’s not a lot I can say. It might be better for it to be short though, given the wrestling abilities or lack thereof in the new team out there. Big Daddy V is somehow more annoying here with that stupid looking yellow Mohawk of his.

He uses that spin kick which is one of his best ever, nearly hitting Edge in the shoulder. It looks impressive, but it never actually connects, at least not that I can remember. Other than that, this is exactly what you would expect. Christian gets beaten up, Edge comes in and they double team Vis before spearing Mideon for the pin, and we get team #4.

Ross is talking about how spent Edge and Christian must be. Why in the world would they be spent? They’ve been wrestling less than 10 minutes and they get about 45 seconds to rest between falls. To say they’re tired is just stupid. The next team is Droz and Prince Albert. I’ll spare you the jokes about piercings, but years later when I found out what the name meant, I wince every time I hear it.

Anyway, this is more or less a team that was just thrown together because there was nothing else to do with them, which can work just fine. The New Age Outlaws got together this way and it worked fine. Anyway, neither guy was anything special yet and for the most part, they never were period. In case you don’t know, Albert became the A-Train.

Sadly enough, Droz would be paralyzed within two months of this, never walking again for the rest of his life, at least since then. This one goes even shorter, with Edge hitting the Downward Spiral after about two minutes. This is the problem with matches like these: unless you let them go an hour, you make a lot of matches and teams just seem like wastes of time and filler.

The fifth team is the Acolytes, not yet the APA. APA was the team that lost the belts to X-Pac and Kane, the current champions, so this was their chance to get the belts back the next night on Raw. Anyway, they’re the big monsters here and one of my favorite teams at the time, at least until the Dudleyz came in a few weeks later to really breathe new life into the division, not that it really needed it at the time, but it didn’t hurt things at all really.

It’s weird to think that at the time, Simmons was by far and away the most successful of these four, yet in the end, he’ll be the least successful. They just beat the tar out of Edge before we go to a big brawl, with Christian taking over on Farooq. For no reason at all, the Hollies come down as the final team, despite not being in the match yet. I guess they just jumped too early? Anyway, Bradshaw, big clothesline, yeah.

Hollies and APA to end this, and this seems REALLY simple here. The bad team fight over who gets to beat up their opponent, which is something I’d just let them do. If they’re going to expend energy and hurt each other, why stop them? Bradshaw, the Einstein of this group, beats Hardcore up while he’s fighting with Crash.

They both do blind tags, leading to another fight. Simmons, the smart one, just lets them do it. Hardcore turns around and walks into a spinebuster for the pin. See how smart it is to just let them beat each other up? Post match, the Hollies go at it even more. Somehow they would become tag champions someday.

Rating: B-. This is a hard one to call, as it was really 5 matches in one, but there were a lot of squashes in there too. Edge and Christian were on display here, as it was obvious they were the best in the company at this point. Overall, this was fine, but it needed more time, which is saying something as it was almost 20 minutes as it was. These kinds of matches are cool in theory, but they have to be done just right. This one came close to doing that.

Show and Taker are just getting here. Yeah thanks for showing up on time.

We cut to a shot of Pepper, Al Snow’s Chihuahua. He says something about how Bossman promised to get both of them, which he eventually would.

Before the match, Road Dogg, who is billed as a big deal in the division despite winning the title only one time, He challenges the winner of the Hardcore title match for tomorrow night. The more I see of him, the more I really like him. He’s very solid in the ring, he’s great on the mic, the fans are into him, and he has a decent resume. Jericho interrupts him though, as a complete rookie at this point.

He hadn’t even been in the company two weeks at this point. Jericho is on an extension of the stage which is up in the air. This was when he was the king of the internet, kind of like Danielson is today. Everyone knew he had all kinds of talent but was being completely wasted in WCW. In a few months with Angle and Benoit being around, they would start tearing the house down every time they were in the ring together and really revolutionize the company as a whole.

You can tell they trusted Jericho a lot, as he debuted in an argument with the Rock. That’s saying a lot when you think about it. He insults Road Dogg as its clear WWF understood him FAR better than WCW did, putting him with two of the best talkers in the company immediately. He is just tearing Road Dogg apart here, as he has the entire crowd going nuts with insults. Roadie’s response: Why don’t you shut up, boy? Yeah, Jericho is light years ahead of him here.

If you can ever find it online, get a copy of Jericho and Foley’s promos together. It’s just them trading these amazing insults and one liners about each other as they both keep trying to top one another. It’s some of the funniest work I’ve ever seen.

Hardcore Title: Al Snow vs. Big Bossman

Roadie joins JR and Jerry for commentary for this match. He immediately threatens to punch Jerry for using the same lines over and over again, gaining cheers from half the audience. Bossman is champion by the way. They do something that’s pretty cool here, as they give Road Dogg a microphone and he follows them around the arena giving commentary. I really like his style as he sounds like a fan cracking jokes about the match as it goes.

He has a very smooth voice and he’s easy to listen to. It’s also a treat for the fans as they never get to hear anything when they’re in the arena. They go into the back and in a spot I shouldn’t laugh at, Bossman picks up Snow’s dog’s box and throws it and the dog across the floor. They fight towards a Pepsi case, which they knock over.

There was no Pepsi in it which is good because Pepsi sucks. This is actually cool as they go outside the arena and fight more. They go across the street which I’m assuming was closed off and fight on the patio of a bar. This is actually really cool when you think about it, but it easily could have gone bad had cops or something not been filled in on this and thought it was a legit bar fight.

Bossman hits him in the head with a yellow pages, which would hurt actually as those things are heavy, especially for a major city like Minneapolis and possibly St. Paul. They do a bunch of random brawling using a bunch of weapons. Snow with a moonsault off a bar. The funny part of this is I’m reviewing this on the night that IC, Norcal and D-Man got together at a bar.

For no reason at all, Road Dogg hits Bossman in the back with the nightstick, followed by Snow hitting Bossman with some pool balls, which allows Snow to pin him on a pool table. Snow runs back to the arena to check on his dog and for no apparent reason beats up Stevie Richards and Blue Meanie. In the process of this he steals a guy’s crutch, causing him to fall down.

Rating: B. This was a run of the mill hardcore match from this era, meaning it was fun. You have to grade some matches on a different kind of scale and this one of them. You can’t grade this like you would a Benoit/Angle match. For what it was, this was a fun match that worked.

Mankind and Ventura are talking. Ventura says that while Mankind is hardcore and Jess is fine with that, if Foley uses a weapon for the pin, Jesse won’t count it. This somehow turns into a political debate that I’d pay to hear.

There’s another Lion’s Den match tonight, but this one has weapons.

Women’s Title: Ivory vs. Tori

Now this isn’t the Torrie that hung out with Stacy. This is Tori that was just around for awhile, mainly hanging out with X-Pac. She never really did much and from what I remember was AWFUL in the ring. Looked hot though. JR apologizes in advance, knowing that it’s going to suck. They’ve been….I guess you’d call it feuding, but this is pre-Lita/Trish, meaning it’s horrible at best for the most part.

Apparently the dog wasn’t in the dog box when Bossman threw it. This makes no sense as he yelled into the cage before throwing it, but whatever. This was when Ivory was just done being Henry’s sex toy, meaning she was still quite hot as long as you didn’t see her full face. Tori is a women’s wrestler, so naturally she has a martial arts background. Here’s some examples of the epicness of this match: Ivory hits a legdrop. Tori literally does not move.

She doesn’t sell, she doesn’t react, she doesn’t do anything and it just looks bad. Ivory then shouts “get ready for the big swing.” Yes, she’s using a giant swing. The crowd is chanting Take It Off, so you get the idea. The finish…might be the worst I’ve ever seen. I’ve been a fan of wrestling for over 20 years, I’ve seen thousands of matches, and I honestly have no clue what this was supposed to be.

Tori goes for a sunset flip and botches it, leading to Ivory being back in control. That’s all fine and good. They botch it, with Ivory being pushed too far and being out of the pin. Immediately after this, they do the EXACT SAME SPOT, but this time instead of Ivory going down like she normally would, she just sits on Tori’s chest. Ivory then “covers” Tori, who’s shoulder is AT LEAST three inches off the mat, for the pin to retain.

The air was allegedly knocked out of her, but she’s up withing seconds and is just fine. Afterwards, for no apparent reason, Ivory throws her on her stomach and starts to unhook her top. While I’m not complaining…actually yes I am. This makes no sense at all other than to embarrass him I guess, but still what’s the point?

She gets it off but before she can fulfill her latent lesbian desires, Luna freaking Vachon, who I swear has been with the company forever, runs out for the save. It went nowhere as far as I can remember.

Rating: F. Oy this was bad. Tori is just flat out awful and while Ivory would become good, she wasn’t there yet. This was just terrible in any and all forms, with the ending being one of the worst I’ve ever seen. Terrible match to say the least.

Rock is with Michael Cole and embarrasses him, as it’s the best thing Cole did. Rock is just amazing here as he’s at his best, just before his hottest period, his summer long feud with HHH in 2000 over the title. For some reason tonight though, he’s against Billy Gunn, who is shown coming in with someone under a sheet.

We get a very different kind of video package, with Lawler and Ross doing prerecorded stuff which just sounds different. It’s odd to hear those two doing voiceover work. Anyway, basically both guy thinks they’re better with weapons than the other, so we have this to determine it.

Lion’s Den: Steve Blackman vs. Ken Shamrock

They start with Blackman pulling nunchucks from his tights which he swings very well. This is more or less a martial arts match in a cage with weapons. It’s actually cool to see two guys that can do this kind of stuff, but I don’t want to see the weapons in there. Seeing these two trying to choke each other out and kicking the heck out of each other would be fun based on the short bits that they do here. I think you can only win by KO or tapping.

We get a kendo stick brought in. So far the weapons use is limited, which makes this a lot better for me. Blackman was ok I guess, but he just bored me to tears a lot of the time. I hated his time as hardcore champion. Those sticks he would use just drove me insane. As I restart the video after typing that, he’s got the sticks. This fight is ok, but I’m still not sold on the weapons stuff. This is kind of like MMA I guess, but only parts of it.

It’s close to a hybrid I guess you could call it, and that’s just fine. This cage is really small actually. Blackman is dominating, but he keeps letting Shamrock get up and it’s just kind of pointless looking. Shamrock’s belly to bellies are just freaking sick looking. Shamrock kills Blackman with the kendo stick to knock him out and end this. Shamrock celebrates to end this segment.

Rating: B-. This is a very hard one to grade as I could see people loving it, liking it or hating it. I could certainly get the argument of there’s no point to having this on a wrestling show and there’s a certain amount of truth to that. However, there’s certainly wrestling in there, and while I’d prefer no weapons, this was fine I thought.

We get a recap of Shane attacking Test on Heat. This was a very cool angle that I always liked, which directly led to the McMahon-Helmsley Era the next year. Here’s the idea: Vince McMahon, back in the spring, had a stable called the Union, comprised of Test, Shamrock, Big Show and Mankind. They were there to simply help him fight off Taker and the Ministry. The reason you’ve never heard of them was they disbanded after literally a month.

Anyway, one night Stephanie was kidnapped and the Union rescued her. Due to this, Vince granted them all a favor of their choice. Most of them picked matches, but Test said he wanted a date with Stephanie. He got what he wanted, and they became an onscreen couple. Now you have to remember at this time, Test was something like John Morrison is now: young, cool looking, a tough guy, and looking like the next big thing.

Shane, being the big brother, decides that a wrestler isn’t good enough for his sister. Let the HHH jokes begin. Anyway, Stephanie yells at him to stay out, so he gets his friends, the Mean Street Posse, to help him fight Test. Naturally, he beats the tar out of all of them and gives them all injuries. Eventually we get to this: Shane vs. Test in a Love Her or Leave Her Greenwich Street Fight. The idea is simple: if Test wins, Shane stays out of their relationship. If Shane wins, they break up.

Street Fight: Shane McMahon vs. Test

The MSP comes out before we get started, all bandaged up etc. There just happens to be a couch waiting on them. Test has bad ribs btw. Within a minute they’re already out in the crowd. Naturally the Posse is already interfering, but Test throws Shane into them. Stephanie, pre implants, is watching in the back. There’s a mailbox next to the Posse, so of course they use it in the match. It’s more or less a standard street fight.

The crowd is way into Test here, so I’ve always wondered why he never took off. We go back to the ring and Shane busts out a freaking  corkscrew moonsault from the top. Every time he’s in the ring he does something impressive and this is no exception. It looks great to say the least. It missed, but it looked great. Test misses a boot and kicks the heck out of the referee. Shane hits the elbow through the table.

That’s the real battle here: who has the better top rope elbow drop? For some reason in a match where there are no rules, the referee has to be distracted. That’s just kind of pointless don’t you think? Back in, Test kicks out to a big pop. For the life of me I don’t get why they dropped his push. He seems to be really over, at least in this match. More or less this is a four on one match, but it’s three jobbers and a part time wrestler.

This really shouldn’t be too much of a challenge, but they’re making it work. The Stooges are here to make the save though, as you don’t mess with the Real Americans. They beat up 2 of the Posse, allowing Test to kick the 3rd in the head, then beat the tar out of Shane with a SWEET looking elbow for the pin. Stephanie runs out to celebrate.

Rating: B. This was a very good street fight. The Posse interfering makes perfect sense as Shane isn’t a polished wrestler and would need help to win. The crowd was WAY into this too. There were good weapons spots, big moves and a solid ending. In short, this was very good and very fun.

Anyway, moving on we have the recap of the tag title match, which is the new champions Kane and X-Pac vs. Big Show and Undertaker. Taker was probably the most evil in his entire career at this point, more or less being the devil. This was around the time that X-Pac was trying to humanize Kane, which never really worked. These kinds of matches are why X-Pac gets the reputation he gets.

Against guy his size he works really well and he’s a fun guy to watch. However, putting him in the ring with three guys whose smallest is the 6’10 328lb Undertaker just does not work at all. He looks out of place and you get into the area where it’s about his heart, which makes even less sense. Also, the X Factor was a horrible move.

It’s a facebuster for those of you unfamiliar with it. For someone his size he needs to be using the ropes for a big high impact move. Those two things changed, Waltman could have been a decent guy. Instead, he’s more or less universally hated, which I don’t think is fair.

Tag Titles: X-Pac/Kane vs. Big Show/Undertaker

The announcers are asking about whether or not the challengers can trust each other. Kane has a different outfit which is his old red and black but inverted. It looks fairly awesome. Taker’s music is just freaking SWEET around this time. For some reason this feels like a No Mercy match to me. I mean the N64 game that is. Not sure why that’s the case but it feels like one.

Basically, this is what you’d expect: faces clean house to start and it gets down to Pac vs. Taker, but the size gets the better of it until Kane comes in. They do a spot that I really like as Taker is about to chokeslam Pac through the table but Kane just pulls him in over the top rope. I think I’m getting where the NM aspect comes in. Kane would be the first player, saving his much weaker partner from the other two guys on Expert mode.

He hits a move, goes for a cover, and saves his partner. Eventually he starts to get beaten down though, as would be expected I suppose. Watching Taker and Kane fight is almost always fun. The history there just makes it fun. It’s odd to see Kane as the face, and there’s a joke there somewhere, vs. Taker as the heel. Just realized the flaw in my No Mercy analogy: Big Show wasn’t in it, and Taker was a biker.

Pac gets in and finally gets the beating that we all knew was coming. The main thing here of course is the heart of X-Pac which I think I’ve mentioned before. Anyway, Show beats on him for awhile but since he hasn’t had a twinkie (I’m sure Rhodes or DiBiase would do) in awhile, he goes to the resthold of doom. We get one of the moves I’ve always hated: the Bronco Buster. DAng can someone just shoot whoever made that move?

Pac kicks out of a Showstopper and Taker is TICKED. He tags himself in, punches the small one, and tombstones the living ehck out of him to get the tag titles. The belt looks small in Show’s hands.

Rating: D+. This just didn’t do it for me. I mean, I know the ending to about 95% of these matches, but a lot of them get me into it. This simply didn’t at all. It was just there and it wasn’t interesting, there was no drama, and it didn’t work. I think the issue here is you have three guys that combine to be over 1000 pounds, and then someone that barely clears 200.

The problem is that there’s far too much of a difference between the sizes and it just didn’t work for me. It would be the Rock N Sock Connection that would take the belts from these monsters in I think about three weeks.

Ventura gives his same speech to Austin.
Rock vs. Billy Gunn

There’s something about if Gunn wins Rock has to kiss up to him. This was a really weird period for Rock as he was over, but Austin was just way too big of a star for Rock to get that top spot. The neck surgery was coming, and Rock would be launched so far into the stratosphere that you couldn’t see him anymore. By the way, this is being written just after Night of Champions ended, so if there’s some anti-Hardy remarks in here, don’t be surprised.

Anyway, Rock was thrown into stupid feud after stupid feud, even being paired with Gangrel for all of a minute. That should speak volumes for how out there they were with him. Anyway, Gunn has a fat lady with him, saying if Rock loses he kisses her, not his, so the ending is pretty obvious already. There was no point to this feud but it filled Rock’s time I guess. Billy Gunn…..where do I begin? This guy was given so many pushes and he never could get it right.

Somehow, this was his most successful gimmick. They’re on the floor and Rock puts King’s crown on Gunn before punching him. Why has no one ever used that as a weapon? If a cookie sheet hurts, that has to have some force behind it. For some reason, Lawler starts going over the possible types of underwear that the fat lady could be wearing. Ross’ reactions are just funny here.

They do the standard near falls, with Rock taking the Fameasser, which for you young guys that don’t know, it’s what Cena does with the leg drop from the top, but Billy just got a running start. It always sucked though as he never got the leg in the right place. Eventually, the woman comes in and sets up in the corner, and you know what’s coming. Yes, Billy takes it which makes the woman smile. Rock is on fire here, drilling the Rock Bottom and the Elbow, as the fans are losing it.

Rating: B-. Seriously, the guy headlines Mania and this is the best they can do for him at the second biggest show of the year? That’s just kind of pathetic. Anyway, this was pretty bland, with no one thinking Rock would lose, but unlike in the Hardy/Punk match, they got the booking right! Ok I think I’m good now. Anyway, Rock wins, he looked good, he got the big pop, and his time was coming, but no one knew it yet.

Oh great. Now I get to recap the buildup for the main event. Sit back, because this might be the most complicated story outside of TNA in wrestling history. Ok, so one night, there was supposed to be a triple threat match to determine the #1 contender for Summerslam, but we didn’t know who the 3rd person was. We had HHH and Taker, but no third person. Commissioner HBK decided that the third person was Chyna.

Now, earlier in the night, someone had jumped Austin and hurt him. Austin shows up at the end of the show with a chair and kills HHH with it, implying he’s the one. It’s a hardcore match, so Austin throws Chyna onto HHH, making her the #1 contender. From what I remember reading, there was actually a debate going on about not only having Austin vs. Chyna, but actually GIVING HER THE TITLE.

Luckily, this lasted all of 9 seconds though as they came back to reality. Anyway, HHH is mad about this, as at the time he was completely obsessed with being the WWF Champion. It was one of the best builds for someone being desperate to be champion that I’ve ever seen. His theme music was My Time at the moment, so everything for him was about claiming his destiny as WWF Champion.

The next week, we got HHH vs. Chyna for the spot. For no reason that I can remember at all, Mankind runs out and hits HHH with the stairs, allowing Chyna to pin him. THEN the next week, Mankind says that he wants a piece of the Summerslam action, and due to the obvious sexual tension between he and Chyna (find this promo. I don’t ever recall laughing so hard at wrestling as the look on Chyna’s face is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen.)

Anyway, Mankind wins, but THEN Shane returns to announce that right here and right now, we’re having a no holds barred match to determine the undisputed #1 contender for Summerslam. HBK and Shane are both referees. Mankind gets the Claw on HHH, but the Game lands a belly to back onto a chair and we get a double pin.

Note: in one of the funniest and stupidest things I’ve ever heard, during this package (pun coming), we hear every curse word I can think of that you can say on TV, yet they censor Chyna saying balls. This amazed me to no end.

WWF Title: Steve Austin vs. Mankind vs. HHH

Before the match, Jesse cuts a short but great promo, talking about how the media has said that he’s a disgrace to the office for being there. He says he’s proud he was a wrestler and he’s proud to be here tonight. That is just awesome. You have to stop and think for a second: at the time, Ventura was the governor of Minnesota. This wasn’t some American Idol guy or NBA impersonator.

This is a major politician, who was considered a dark horse candidate for the White House. Another person called a dark horse candidate in the past: President Obama. Just think about that. Imagine 4 years ago having Barack Obama refereeing the main event of Summerslam and clearly being excited about it and not just waving and looking like he’d rather pound a rusty spike into his face.

You can tell Jesse is having fun up there and wants to be there. That’s a nice thing to see. For the most part, people that are wrestlers are proud of it and it’s not just something you do and then don’t do. Oh apparently Foley is in this because HHH injured his knee with the hammer. We get the shots of the walk towards the entrance, which I’m not sure if I like or not. Nothing beats the shot of the fans when the music hits, and I don’t want to see the guys before that.

HHH was wearing some weird vest made of chain link around this time. I never got the point of that. Foley’s pop is actually very solid so you know he’s still over, which is odd as he would be retired in about 8 months. Austin’s pop is MASSIVE. Foley is very smart here, staying on the floor at first and letting Austin and HHH fight. That’s brilliant, and it’s coming from one of the craziest wrestlers of all time.

Austin and Mankind beat up HHH, so Mankind hugs him and offers a handshake. Right hands follow. It’s your standard wild brawl to start with HHH and Austin doing most of the work. Wow. Upon a bit of research, Austin is only 34 here. It’s hard to think that his career was mostly over at this point. Chyna interferes and low blows Mankind, so Jesse throws her out.

The cool thing about Ventura is that he was always a guy that wasn’t afraid of anyone, and as a Navy SEAL, you knew he was tough. He’s perfect for this and has to be the best guest ref I can think of. Mankind and HHH work together, which you’ll never hear again. This match is just kind of going with the motions so far and while it’s good, it’s not great. HHH sets for what might have been a figure four while Mankind drops a leg.

It’s Hogan and Flair vs. Austin. This partnership lasts all of 18 seconds and it ends with a Cactus clothesline before Mankind runs across the apron and flips onto HHH. Mankind is doing flippys. Maybe he does belong in TNA. HHH is working on Austin’s bad knees which makes sense. Austin and HHH go into the crowd as Foley follows. You know one day someone needs to land a piledriver on the floor.

We always get it teased but we never see it. MORE VIOLENCE DANG IT! Foley takes a good stunner. He just falls to the side, plain and simple. HHH breaks it up with a chair, and Jesse says he won’t count it. That’s just awesome on so many levels. Shane slides in to break up the fight between HHH and Jesse. The mouth on Jesse could rival Austin’s if my lip reading is working. Jesse throws Shane over the top as I’m loving this. This is just awesome.

He says that was for your old man you little bastard. Vince vs. Jesse NEEDS to happen. Who cares if they’re both senior citizens? Correction: Jesse is….58? WOW. I would have had him pushing social security. So….wow he was in his late 40s here? That explains a lot. Late 30s as well for the Mania stuff? I’m impressed. Mankind breaks up the pin on the stunner as we’re running very low on time.

HHH gets the pedigree, but Foley breaks it up and hits the double arm on Austin to win the title and shock the world. The fans are almost dead silent for about ten seconds, then go nuts as someone not named HHH is champion. HHH is just losing it in the corner as Jesse hands Foley the title. HHH lands about ten chair shots to the legs of Austin as he can’t believe he didn’t get the belt again.

He’d win the next night on Raw, with the rumor being that he was supposed to get it here, but Austin refused to job for him. That’s never been confirmed one way or the other though, and since this was the Attitude Era, it certainly could be wrong.

Rating: B+. This just didn’t have the main event feeling to it. Jesse definitely lived up to the hype here as he was about as good as you can get for a special guest referee. The match itself was good, but the ending was out of nowhere. It wasn’t bad or anything, but this was the definition of a swerve.

NO ONE saw this coming as the stars aligned for HHH on this night it seemed. Anyway, Foley winning was a nice surprise and kind of his last hurrah, saying that he still had it before the completely underrated feud with HHH started in about 2-3 months time.

Overall Rating: B-. This show was good, but just good. The matches are good enough, the main event was a twist, the fans were happy I suppose and there were some fun moments, but there’s no big spark to make it a great show. This would have been awesome as something like Judgment Day or No Way Out, but for Summerslam, it’s just a good show.

Mild recommendation, as it’s your traditional Attitude Era stuff: if you like this era you’ll love it and if you’re not a fan you’ll be very mildly entertained but get bored at some parts. It’s ok, but just barely.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 19, 2001
Location: Charlotte Coliseum, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Well the Invasion is over and I don’t think anyone is really complaining that it’s done. Tonight we basically hit a big reset button tonight as things get back to “normal” for the first time in months tonight. I have no idea what to expect with this show. Well ok I do as I remember watching it and the big surprise on it but it makes for a better intro if I say that. Let’s get to it.

We open with Foley and Vince on a plane earlier today. Foley says he knows that he’s getting fired, but Vince only says Have a Nice Day. That’s the last we would see of Mick Foley in the WWF/E for over a year and a half.

Here’s Vince to open the show and you know he’s happy after last night. He thanks Angle for ending the Alliance and says that ECW is dead. Until there was an opening due to high DVD sales of course. The WCW Title is now the World Championship, which is different from the WWF Championship because…..because this is called the World Championship. Also tonight, someone is going to become the inaugural member of Vince’s special club. That person gets to keep their job (along with the champions as they get to keep their jobs too).

That brings Vince to the leader of the Alliance. As soon as Austin arrives here tonight, Vince’s plans go into effect. There’s one more change: we have an empty seat on commentary. Vince brings out Paul Heyman who sits on the commentary desk, but Vince never said that Paul was the new commentator. Vince calls him into the ring and Heyman immediately starts sucking up.

McMahon says he’s a first amendment guy (Heyman: “And one of the best ever sir!”) and using his first amendment, he says that Heyman is fired. Heyman wants to fight but as the jacket comes off, Heyman runs. Heyman walks on the floor and then lunges at JR, who beats the tar out of him. Security pulls Heyman off and takes him out. Vince calls out Lawler to be JR’s partner again. That just feels right.

Women’s Title: Lita vs. Trish Stratus

Trish is defending after winning the title last night in a Six Pack Challenge. Last night Trish was seen coming out of the Hardys’ locker room when only Matt was in there so there’s some heat here. Trish is AWFUL at this point so don’t expect any kind of a good match here. Fifteen seconds in and they HORRIBLY botch a wristlock.

Spear gets two for Lita as does a sunset flip. Trish sends her into the middle rope for two before hitting an awkward slam. Lita hits a bad flapjack for another near fall before Trish kicks her in the chest to take over. An elbow misses for Stratus but she manages to shove Lita off the top to the floor. Trish kicks Lita into Matt so Matt throws Lita back in. Trish backslides her to retain. This was HORRIBLE.

Vince goes to see the Dudleys, Stacy, Test, Van Dam and Christian. These are the people who aren’t fired for being either champions, immune, or gorgeous. Vince punishes Van Dam for not accepting his offer to join the WWF a few months ago by making him face the Dudleys in a handicap tables match. The three of them and Stacy leave so Christian can suck up to Vinny a bit. That gets him nowhere.

Rob Van Dam vs. Dudley Boys

Jerry has to make up his flirting jokes about Stacy so he fires off a bunch to start. Van Dam has to fight them both off at once and makes D-Von clothesline Bubba by mistake. Rolling Thunder hits D-Von but Rob walks into a Bubba Bomb. Rob comes back by spearing Bubba into the corner, only to walk into a neckbreaker out of said corner from D-Von. Here are a pair of tables, one on the mat and one in the corner. Rob grabs a rope to avoid 3D and sends D-Von to the floor.

A kick takes Bubba down and a Van Daminator takes him down even more. D-Von comes back in and takes some kicks of his own, sending him onto a table. Van Dam goes for what would have been the longest Five Star ever, but he leaves it short (no shock) and breaks the table WITH HIS FACE. FREAKING OW MAN!!! The Dudleys pick up the dead body that used to be RVD and 3D him onto the table, as it doesn’t break. The second 3D wins it and I think Van Dam needs a doctor.

Rating: C. Van Dam has earned this rating on his own. It’s not that the Dudleys didn’t do anything, but those landings with Van Dam were SCARY, especially the Frog Splash. There was no point to this, but the handicap tables match was the signature “punishment” match in 2001. Van Dam should have gotten a bigger push in 2001.

Angle is here and he’s still smug.

Linda McMahon is at WWF New York, likely looking for Connecticut registered voters.

Angle goes in to see Rock and wants his thank you for the company still being in business. Rock isn’t amused and wants to know when Angle was planning on letting the WWF know when he was a mole. Angle spent a month blasting WWF guys with chairs but Angle says it was worth it. Rock agrees and says Angle should try to beat him up now. Angle says he’ll do it for the title. Rock will never trust either Angle or Vince again. I don’t think Rock accepted the challenge for the title match but maybe that was implied.

Shane and Stephanie arrive in a rental car. Stephanie could always make a living if she wore those dresses on the street.

Vince is in the ring again and apparently the acceptance of the match was implied as Vince says it’s happening. Austin isn’t here yet so let’s deal with his kids. Here they are and Vince says he likes hearing Stephanie called a w****. Shane tells Vince that he won and that he (Shane) lost to the better man. Shane leaves and that’s that.

Stephanie plays the daddy’s little girl card, calling herself young and naive. She blames Shane for everything that happened, including Linda getting slapped. It was Shane that made Stephanie slap Linda and tell Vince that she wanted him to die. She says she’s sorry and tries to cry. Vince calls for security and Stephanie is literally dragged away. Vince starts the goodbye song.

Jericho comes in to see Vince (notice his name coming up a lot tonight?) and Vince yells at him for putting the WWF in jeopardy last night by attacking Rock. Jericho says that it was due to his ego which Vince isn’t happy with. Vince doesn’t like big egos, but he loves MASSIVE egos. Oh and Jericho gets Kane tonight.

Mr. T. is here.

World Title: The Rock vs. Kurt Angle

Rock is defending. Kurt gets in some early right hands to take over and Rock gets stomped. Rock comes back with punches of his own but he gets sent to the floor very quickly. Back in and a belly to back suplex gets two for Kurt. There’s the ankle lock but Rock quickly breaks it. The countering doesn’t last long as he walks into a belly to belly to take him down again. Another belly to belly gets two and Kurt pounds away.

They’re clearly just going through the motions here but since tonight is pretty much resetting everything, it’s pretty much ok as the matches are just there to fill time until they figure out what they’re doing next. Angle goes up but gets crotched and Rock hits a belly to back superplex. Kurt clotheslines him down but Rock nips up and makes his comeback. Spinebuster looks to set up the Rock Bottom but Kurt counters into the Slam for no cover. Ankle lock is countered into a rollup for Rock to retain.

Rating: D+. Like I said they were going through the motions here and it didn’t do anything at all. They basically took the night off here and that’s ok. Angle threw in some suplexes to make it look like he was trying but they were clearly in very low gear. Angle would do nothing of note until he went to Smackdown in the Brand Split while Rock kept being Rock.

Angle attacks Rock post match and Jericho comes out to help him. Both use their submissions on Rock.

Here’s Vince for the 12^th time tonight for the Club stuff. The first inductee: William Regal. Regal offers to be a gopher for Vince but Vince says he meant the title of this club literally. Vince has Regal get on his knee and Vince takes his pants down. We’re watching one of Vince’s fantasies aren’t we? Vince takes his underwear down too and makes it dance. Oh wait Regal has to use chapstick first. Vince bends over a bit and Regal kisses it. Someone send Linda’s Senate opponent this clip NOW. The election will be over.

Regal gets laughed at by people like Taz, who still has a job because….someone help me out here. Regal slugs him.

Chris Jericho vs. Kane

Kane speeds things up to start and sends him into the corner. Jericho sends him into the rope and slingshots Kane’s throat into the bottom rope to take over. A swinging neckbreaker misses for the most part but we’ll count it anyway. Jericho grabs a chair which is quickly knocked out of his hand. Kane goes up and jumps into the chair for the DQ. This was nothing.

Jericho beats on Kane and puts him in the “Walls” (they couldn’t quite get it right either time they tried) and no one makes the save. Wasn’t Undertaker the one preaching about being a unit?

Creed Desire video.

Angle yells at Edge but Edge says he saved his own job by winning the IC Title last night. Edge accuses Angle of playing both sides last night. Their feud wouldn’t start for about six months if my memory is right.

William Regal vs. Taz

Taz punches, Tazmission is broken up, Regal Stretch ends this in less than a minute. Taz has a job because of being a commentator. Ok then. The arena is all smoky from Taz’s pyro.

Kurt is melancholy over not being thanked for saving the company, so Vince offers him the WWF Title.

Vince and Angle go to the ring and Vince tells the fans to thank Kurt for what he did last night. Vince says Austin can stay wherever he is because we need a dignified champion. This is a very fast heel turn by Vince who was the nicest guy in the world all night so far. Vince says that as the sole owner of the WWF, he’s going to….be interrupted by some very familiar music.

RIC FLAIR walks out (notice the location of the show) and the place goes bonkers. Vince calls Flair a has been but Flair is very happy. He says he bet on a winner last night when he bet on the WWF. Flair says Angle should win the world title in the ring like he’s capable of doing.

Vince keeps trying to get Flair out but Flair says that this morning when Shane and Stephanie sold their stock in the company (what stock? They had bought WCW and ECW, which in storylines were different companies. What stock would they still have in the WWF? I guess the idea is that Flair bought it in June, but he flat out says he bought it “this morning”. Eh it’s WWF logic so we’ll go with it) this morning, Flair bought it, so now he and McMahon are partners. The look on Vince’s face is GREAT.

Cue Austin who beats the tar out of Angle and runs him off. Flair hands Austin the title as Austin is a good guy again. A beer bash ends the show.

Overall Rating: D. The only good stuff to come out of this was in the last ten minutes, but it raises A TON of questions. First and foremost, WHY DIDN’T THEY BRING FLAIR IN SIX MONTHS AGO??? A Flair owned WCW and a Heyman owned ECW (what a strange business partnership that would have been) vs. the Vince owned WWF would have been a very interesting story, but instead that whole thing is gone, it appears to be Austin vs. Vince again, and Rock vs. Jericho is going to light things on fire for awhile. That’s one heck of a reset.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 12, 2001
Location: Fleet Center, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

It’s the final Raw of the Alliance Era and I bet they’ll talk about the Winner Takes All match this Sunday. The fact that this is ending in less than six months has never ceased to blow my mind. There’s no reason for things to have wrapped up that fast, but then again I’m not Vince McMahon so what do I know about how to run a story that could have drawn billions and run for years? Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from Smackdown with Taz saying that he doesn’t trust Austin anymore, earning himself a beating. The Alliance walked out on Austin. Angle told Austin to shove his hat and Austin Stunned him as well.

Here’s Angle to open the show. He talks about how there was a team that had a chance to win it all, but infighting broke that down and now they’re losers. They would be the Red Sox from this season of course. Angle wants Austin here right now, but instead he gets Edge. Edge calls Angle a coward and wants a US Title match RIGHT NOW.

US Title: Edge vs. Kurt Angle

So not only can all three McMahons and both Commissioners make matches, but wrestlers can too. Sure why not. Edge immediately dropkicks him down but Angle takes him to the mat. Edge speeds things up again and takes Kurt down before doing Kurt’s signature pose. They go to the mat again and Edge grabs the arm to control. The half nelson bulldog that edge stopped doing when he got to be a bigger star gets two.

Angle grabs a belly to belly to send Edge up and over to the floor and the challenger is in trouble. Back in that only gets two but Edge is reeling. Edge comes back with a quick flapjack but Angle rolls him down to the ground and it’s off to a chinlock. Edge tries to go up but he jumps into a belly to belly suplex. The moonsault misses and both guys are down.

Edge makes his comeback and the Edgecution and Angle Slam are both countered. Edge-O-Matic gets two and a victory roll gets the same for the challenger. Angle Slam hits and there’s the ankle lock but here’s Kane. Or rather just his entrance for a distraction so Edge can spear Angle down for the pin and the title in a major upset.

Rating: C-. As good as these guys would get over the next year or so, this really didn’t click for the most part. Edge wasn’t ready to beat Angle here so the cheating finish helps, but it still wasn’t much to go on. They were getting there though and their feud in 2002 basically brought Edge up to a new level.

Post match here’s Kane to beat up Kurt. Kane puts him in the ankle lock until some Alliance jobbers come in to get beaten up instead.

Taz has challenged Austin to a non-title match tonight because he’s all ragey.

WWF Tag Titles: Hardy Boys vs. Booker T/Test

The Hardys slide in but get jumped immediately. A suplex puts Jeff down and gets two for Booker. It’s quickly off to Test but Jeff pounds him back. A gutwrench powerbomb stops the comeback but Test’s big boot misses. The not hot tag brings in Matt who cleans house, hitting the middle rope legdrop on Booker for two. There’s the Twist/Swanton to Jeff but Test kicks Jeff’s head off. Everything breaks down and Lita hits the rana on Booker so Jeff can roll him up for the titles.

Rating: D+. YAY the Hardys are champions again! This matters…..why? No really why does this matter? Everything ends on Sunday so this is like the proverbial changing deck chairs on the Titanic. Who cares if the Hardys get another tag title run or if Edge is US Champion? There was nothing here either as it was barely long enough to grade.

Chavo Guerrero and Hugh Morrus come to Vince and ask for jobs if the Alliance loses. Why would I care if they have jobs or not?

Steve Austin vs. Taz

Austin is in jean shorts and a sweatshirt. Taz jumps him as he comes in and pounds on Austin in the corner. A low blow breaks up the Tazmission and the Stunner gets the pin. This didn’t even last 45 seconds.

Shane comes out and tells Austin to get off Taz. The Alliance is waiting in the back for a speech from Austin apparently.

The Desire video is about Undertaker. It still sounds like a perfume commercial.

Stephanie addresses the Alliance and I’m liking the leather jacket on her. She fires Morrus and Guerrero and Austin comes in. He yells at Angle but Shane yells at Austin, saying Austin needs to worry about The Rock. Booker gets yelled at for no apparent reason and this turns into another “we need to come together” pep talk. Then Shane leaves and it turns into an argument.

WCW Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Scotty 2 Hotty/Albert

Scotty gets jumped but Albert (currently Tensai) in a stupid hat makes the save. Stacy gets in for no apparent reason and hits on Scotty but Albert rips her skirt down. That would be more valuable than all of his current WWE run combined. They load up the Worm but the Dudleys pull Stacy out and pull her out and leave. No match I guess.

Jericho complains to Vince about how Rock is too obsessed with the People. Vince tells Jericho to get over it because the match on Sunday is more important.

Regal is warming up when Christian comes in. They have some tea and Regal casually tells him he’s facing Big Show tonight. Christian panics and Regal whispers something to him which calms Christian down.

Hardcore Title: Undertaker vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam is defending and he fires off strikes in the corner to start. Taker comes back with right hands in the corner as well but Van Dam clotheslines him to the floor. Van Dam dives at Taker but gets caught and rammed into the post. They go up to the stage and Taker misses a boot so that his leg gets caught in part of the set. Van Dam climbs up said set and dives off with a cross body for a very delayed two.

Rob knocks Taker over to the edge of the stage but Taker knocks him back for the sake of avoiding death. Taker pounds away and slams Van Dam into the set again. The Last Ride is loaded up but Booker runs out to break it up. Booker and Van Dam pound Taker down and they head back inside. Taker fights back but Booker takes him down again. Booker goes up but gets crotched and superplexed. Van Dam comes in out of nowhere and hits the Five Star while Taker is down to retain.

Rating: D. This show is AWFUL. The matches have no thought or effort into them at all and it’s sucking the little life they had left out of the building. Weren’t Booker and Van Dam having issues recently? Well apparently they patched things up off camera because they’re fine now. Nothing to see here and it’s very clear that no one cared at all.

Rock comes in to see Vince and Vince tries to make peace with Rock and Jericho. Rock wants nothing to do with a “moose hunting Twisted Sister wannabe.” Somehow this took almost five minutes.

Here’s Mick Foley for a promo I remember being very sad to see back in the day. Foley says that he’s out of a job no matter what happens on Sunday because about three days after he became Commissioner, Vince came back and made him worthless again. Foley has a lot of things he wants to do with the rest of his life and answering to Vince isn’t one of them. If the WWF wins, Vince can take his job but he can’t take his pride.

Foley goes on a rant and a half about how the title he has in his closet (the WWF Title he won on January 4, 1999) means nothing anymore because EVERYONE has a title anymore and none of them mean anything at all. With the power he has for a little while longer, he’s going to get rid of some titles. Before he tells us how, he goes on another rant about how at Raw and Smackdown last week, he was told he wasn’t needed. I mean, why put Mick Foley on TV in Long Island? “Maybe I’m not needed on the program, but the program sure needs something and more titles isn’t it”.

On Sunday it’s Edge vs. Test in a US/IC unification match (Foley gets the respective titles wrong but that kind of reinforces his point. Neither guy had held their belts for even a month so does it matter?) and the Hardys vs. the Dudleys in a cage to unify the tag belts (for the second time in three months of course). That brings him to the Light Heavyweight and Cruiserweight Titles. “Well X-Pac is MIA. No one knows where he is and no one really cares”. Since Pac doesn’t exist anymore, Regal will face Tajiri instead and that’s that.

I want to talk about this promo for a minute. First and foremost, he’s absolutely right about almost everything he said. At this point, there were 10 championships in the company, and that’s counting the tag titles as one title instead of two. Think that that. On top of that, this was Mick Foley, one of the top stars the company has ever had and one of the nicest guys in the history of wrestling, just erupting on national TV because of how awful things had gotten. This was just over seven months after the best show in wrestling history and it’s fallen this far. Let that sink in for a minute.

Christian vs. Big Show

Non-title of course because Big Show can’t be bothered trying to win the European Title. Show shoves him down to start and throws on a bearhug. Christian is knocked to the floor and DDP comes out. That goes absolutely nowhere as he can’t even get in the ring. Christian brings in a chair but Show hits it into his face for the pin at 1:27.

This is EXACTLY what Foley is complaining about: a champion just got destroyed in less than 90 seconds and why? Christian is defending his title on Sunday but do you think his opponent was even mentioned? Big Show is in the main event of the PPV but he’s here squashing Christian in short order? Why? Does this make him look like a threat in the main event? He’s Big Show, a former world champion and a guy that has main evented Wrestlemania.

Why should Christian need to get crushed like this for the sake of Big Show? There are a dozen guys in the Alliance that you could do this to who don’t have belts, but we just HAD to have Christian get beaten up right? At the end of the day, I doubt very seriously that the WWF could have answered that back then, or they would say it doesn’t matter, which is a big part of the problem.

Anyway the Dudleys come out and break a table over Show’s head before the APA shows up for the save. Not the Hardys, as in the team that the Dudleys are facing on Sunday, but the APA, a team that is in a yet to be mentioned on this show battle royal for immunity from being fired. Little things like that are the way you can tell no one is paying attention or thinking at all.

No one is at WWF New York.

Rock is walking in the back and goes into a room. That’s it. Seriously, that’s all they showed here.

Edge was at a Rob Zombie concert in New Mexico. Riveting indeed. Edge just started using Rob Zombie as his entrance music so we see Zombie perform the FULL SONG. I like the song but if I wanted to watch a music video, I’d watch a music video.

Rock is in his locker room when Jericho comes in. Jericho complains about what Rock called him earlier and Rock complains about Jericho complaining about the people. This is pretty much the ONLY thing that was interesting on Raw at this point. Taker comes in to yell at them and complains about getting double teamed while no one came to help him. I guess when Kane and Big Show, as in the other two members of Team WWF, were getting double teamed earlier, Taker was busy having a meatball sandwich and watching Days of Our Lives, because he certainly didn’t help them out.

Kane comes in and gets yelled at too. Taker yells at the team for not being unified. Big Show is never mentioned at all during this speech. Rock and Jericho, two of the biggest mouths ever, have nothing to say to this. Oh wait Rock says they’re a team and what Taker says is clear. The tall guys leave and Jericho wishes Rock luck. Rock says he’ll be waiting for Jericho.

WCW World Title: The Rock vs. William Regal

Rock didn’t even bother changing into trunks for this. Regal jumps Rock to start and they head to the floor for a bit. Back inside and Regal hits the knee trembler for two. Off to a fast chinlock but Rock comes back with a belly to belly suplex and a DDT for two. They head outside again but Tajiri comes out to Mist Regal. You know, because Rock can’t beat Regal on his own. Spinebuster and Sharpshooter get the win for Rock. This was nothing AGAIN.

Rock calls out Austin and here’s the bald one after a break. They stare each other down and Rock says they go back to Wrestlemania. Rock remembers that night and the next night as well as earlier when Austin says he can beat Rock. Rock hopes Austin jumps to the WWF so Rock can beat Austin up in the WWF for the WWF Title. He says FINALLY but Austin takes the mic out of his hand. Now Austin wants to say FINALLY but Rock takes the mic. Rock tries to say it again but Austin pulls the mic away again. He makes fun of the people chanting Rocky and says FINALLY, but Rock pulls the mic away again. Now Rock makes fun of WHAT. It’s so clear they have NO IDEA how to fill in this time so they’re just messing around.

Austin WHAT’S the crowd for a bit and the fans applaud. Austin says that’s the bottom line but Rock steals the mic before Austin can finish. Rock says what (complete with a stutter that sounds like WOO WOO WOO beforehand) but Austin takes the mic away for about the 9 millionth time. Rock says Austin’s breath smells like strudel. Austin says he (as in Austin) has a beer belly and it’s fuel for fighting but he’s not going to do that right now. Austin says Rock has hurt his feelings and it looks like they’re finally about to fight but instead Austin wants to sing. Yes I said SING.

Austin talks about a rock band called Boston but he doesn’t remember any of their songs right now. Instead he’s going to sing Delta Dawn (complete with a shout out to a fan in Texas with a busted up leg. Ok then) and he does in fact sing the song. Rock counters with The Gambler by Kenny Rogers and we’ve officially entered the point where I have no idea what to think anymore. Rock: “That make you feel better?” Austin: “I feel like crap.” And now, TIME FOR A DUET!

They sing Margaritaville as I’m trying to remember these two singing in front of nearly 68,000 people in Houston. Oh scratch that as that was a thirty minute blood bath in the classic main event of the greatest show of all time. Instead they’re here talking about a lost shaker of salt. Aren’t they supposed to be fighting for their jobs on Sunday? Rock says he’ll never forget and Rock Bottoms Austin. Angle comes in and the big brawl between the teams ends the show. Jericho makes the save with a chair and stands behind Rock but he doesn’t swing it.

Overall Rating: F. I am in awe of what I just spent 90 minutes watching. The last fifteen minutes of this show was a singing contest between two of the three biggest stars in wrestling history. You know, as in the guys that have had the only main event trilogy at Wrestlemania ever. Now don’t get me wrong: the segment was kind of entertaining, but when it goes on for FIFTEEN MINUTES at the end of a dreadful show, it’s only going to be so good. These guys are supposed to hate each other and they look like they’re at a comedy club. Horrible show with a freaking bizarre ending.

Here’s Survivor Series if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/10/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2001-the-end-of-the-alliance-thank-goodness/

Also here is an article I wrote about the Invasion and my thoughts on why it didn’t work and what I would have changed:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/01/28/i-want-to-talk-a-little-bit-about-the-invasion/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 9, 1998
Location: Reunion Arena, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 13,684
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the final show before Survivor Series and the Deadly Game Tournament to crown a new WWF Champion. Nothing has been announced tonight but Rock is currently out of the tournament, so I’d bet there’s going to be a way tonight for him to get back into the field. I barely remember this time for some reason but next week we’re in Lexington, which I didn’t go to for some reason. Let’s get to it.

Rock vs. Henry tonight and if Rock doesn’t win by pin or submission he’s fired.

X-Pac vs. Undertaker

Pac tries to fight fast, kicking Taker into the corner to start. Taker grabs him by the throat and launches Pac into the corner to pounds away. Maybe 30 seconds in the lights go out and here’s Kane.

Taker stands X-Pac next to him and Kane shoots a fireball at Pac. Kane chases Taker up the ramp.

X-Pac is getting treatment on his eye in the back.

Vince tells Mankind that he has to defend the Hardcore Title tonight against Shamrock. Mankind is cool with that but Vince also wants to give Mankind a makeover. This could be interesting.

Val Venis vs. Steve Blackman

Terri still says Val is the father of her baby but last night on Heat Val said he had a vasectomy. Val tries to start fast but Blackman kicks him in the chest to take him down. Off to a quick chinlock followed by a chop to the chest to take Val down again. A snap suplex gets two for Steve as does a spin kick. In a counter I’ve never seen before, Val avoids a sunset flip to send Blackman crashing to the mat. Val hits some knees to the ribs but here’s Terri to hit Val low and draw the DQ.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as this was about Val and Terri more than anything else. Blackman was nothing of note by this point and he just filled in a spot on the roster. Val was another character that only had so much of a shelf life as an adult star isn’t something that can go very far, at least not on basic cable. This was pretty worthless.

Owen Hart runs out and beats up Steve Blackman.

Mankind gets a haircut.

Mosh vs. Road Dogg vs. D’Lo Brown

Brown and Dogg get started without Mosh. Shane McMahon is the referee and Mosh is in now. Everyone fights everyone to start and no one can get a clear advantage. Mosh rolls up Dogg for two. Brown is the only one left standing and he informs us that he does not suck. He misses a charge into the corner and Mosh pounds away at him, only for Roadie to roll him up for two.

Mosh dumps Brown to the floor and gets two on Road Dogg. A top rope leg drop misses but the frog splash misses Mosh. Everyone is down so Shane counts a bit. Road Dogg is the first one up and he double clotheslines both guys down, only to walk into a leg lariat from Brown. Mosh hits the Stage Dive (top rope seated senton) out of nowhere on Brown for the pin.

Rating: C. I liked this as they didn’t have a formula for these things yet so this actually came off as something different out of a three way match. They were playing up the idea that anyone could win here so that on Sunday when the titles were on the line in the triple threat the titles would seem to be more in jeopardy. This was surprisingly good.

Jarrett says Al Snow ticks him off and on Sunday he’s going to take him out. As for tonight, Debra (who sounds like she has a sore throat) says she’ll prove Goldust is all man.

Mankind gets a pedicure and mourns his losing of Socko.

Goldust vs. Jeff Jarrett

Terri comes out in the Marlena outfit but Goldust tells her to get out of his life because she’s earned her problems. Jarrett jumps Goldie and knocks him to the floor. Back in and Goldust rolls through a top rope cross body for two and takes over with his usual strikes. Back to the floor and Jarrett gets dropped face first onto the steps. Debra offers a distraction and Jarrett clotheslines Goldust, somehow making him fall forward. That gets Jeff nowhere though as Goldust hits a bulldog for two back inside. Goldie pounds away in corner but Debra blocks Shattered Dreams. Goldust kisses her but walks into a guitar shot for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Again this was just filler but it had some cleavage in it at least. Other than that though this was just filler until we got to the guitar shot as well as a way to have the beginning part with Terri being told to get away from Dustin. These two seem to be the same kind of old school guys so the match wasn’t bad but it was pretty worthless.

Rock arrives.

We talk about Jesse Ventura being elected recently.

Rock says he doesn’t like Vince that much but he’ll keep his job tonight. He doesn’t quite have his signature promo style down yet but that would really come into form next year.

After Rock is done talking we turn to see Goldust beating the tar out of Jarrett. The Blue Blazer runs up and attacks Goldust. Goldust gets up and goes after Jarrett again as the Blazer has left.

Hardcore Title: Ken Shamrock vs. Mankind

Mankind is defending but I can’t call him the champ because Shamrock is IC Champion. Mankind is in a tuxedo here. Vince and company come out to watch on the stage. Shamrock pounds him down to start and hits a leg lariat to put Mankind down again. Mankind takes off his shoe to hit Shamrock in the head and take over again. After a quick trip to the Tree of Woe we head to the floor and Shamrock grabs a small package for two.

Now Shamrock hits Mankind with the shoe and they go onto the announce table with Mankind pounding away. Back into the ring as Lawler is amazed by the shoe for some reason. Mankind and his blue vest are backdropped onto a chair for no cover. Back to the floor and Mankind reverses a whip, sending Shamrock into the steps. There’s the Claw on the floor as the announcers take some jabs at WCW for the Halloween Havoc 98 debacle.

Shamrock sends him into the steps to escape the hold and things slow down a bit. A belly to belly suplex puts Mankind down but Ken can’t cover. He goes for the ankle but Mankind kicks him low to escape. A chair shot to the back puts Shamrock down again but Mankind DDTs him on the chair for a close two.

Mankind chases him up the ramp with the chair but he can’t make contact on any of the swings. Shamrock grabs a belly to back suplex up by Vince but it only gets two. With both guys slowly getting up, Shamrock kills him with a chair but Bossman hits Shamrock with the nightstick and Mankind gets the pin to retain. Mankind didn’t see Bossman hit Shamrock.

Rating: C+. This was a far different kind of match than the Hardcore Title matches you would get used to which were based in comedy, as these two were beating the tar out of each other. Also this was back in the day when there wasn’t a history of these matches. See, new stuff did come out of the Attitude Era.

Rock has been attacked but we don’t know anything else about it.

Scratch that as apparently Rock has been hit in the back of the head with something.

Here’s Austin for a chat. Austin talks about overstepping his bounds with Vince and lists off some of the ways in which he’s done that. Here’s Bossman who says he’s well paid to take care of Austin on Sunday. Austin says that sounds like a threat so Austin implies that Bossman likes having fun with inmates in the shower. Or maybe that’s just how I interpreted him saying Bossman hears squeaks in the night. They’ll fight on Sunday. One thing to note here: Bossman kept saying the date of Survivor Series. That’s an old school tactic to sell a show and it’s very effective. Why does no one do that more often?

Rock is still being worked on.

Vince says Rock still has to win as an ambulance is being loaded up.

Al Snow vs. Tiger Ali Singh

Singh says Snow is wrestling Babu. Snow jumps Singh and hits him with Head. Here’s Debra as Babu gets sent into the ring.

Al Snow vs. Babu

Snow hits a wheelbarrow suplex but Singh offers a distraction. Babu gets in some offense but Snow shrugs it off. Singh low bridges Snow and Debra steals Head. Back in the ring the Snow Plow kills Babu but Snow sees Debra with Head. Singh bulldogs Snow and gets the pin. Since this is 1998, we’ll go with “sure, why not.”

Video of Sable working out.

Rock is STILL down in his locker room. Vince says he has to fight tonight.

Kane vs. Edge

Who would have thought this would be a world title match on some PPVs 12 years later? Kane has a can of gasoline and what appears to be a blowtorch. Edge runs to start but Kane gets his hands on him. The monster chokes in the corner but Edge clotheslines him to the floor. Back in and the beating really begins as Kane starts throwing the much smaller Edge around.

A rana is countered into a powerbomb and Edge is in trouble. He gets up and tries a missile dropkick but Kane shrugs it off. Kane sits up out of a DDT and throws Edge over the top and onto Gangrel. He clotheslines Edge off the steps and starts beating up the rest of the Brood. Edge gets in a baseball slide and a dive over the top rope to take Kane down. The rest of the Brood beats on Kane and there’s the DQ.

Rating: D. There was nothing to see here as Edge was getting NOTHING here, although to be fair he was nowhere near ready to do that yet. We don’t know anything about the Brood yet other than Edge and Christian are brothers. This wasn’t much of a match and the ending really hurt things too. Still though, nothing to see here.

Kane chokeslams all of them and piles them all up. He gets the gasoline and blowtorch as it’s time for a little human burning. Kane chokeslams the referee and puts him on the pile too. Other referees come up and save the guys from incineration.

Kane goes into the crowd for no apparent reason and chokeslams a fan over the railing.

Here’s Vince with something to say. Vince has the goons turn him to the stage so he can see Rock come out. Rock can wrestle with a headache so where is he? Vince says we’re in Dallas, the home of the Cowboys. Some Cowboys are here tonight and he wonders if they have the guts to stand up and be recognized. Vince makes fun of the Cowboys and says they’re on a losing streak. I’m a big Dallas fan so this is great heel stuff for me.

Instead Shane comes out with a mic. He says that this is about family business, not Rock or Austin or the people. Vince says this is his business, not family business. He tells Shane to get out before the goons beat on him. Shane stands his grounds so Vince tells Bossman to get him. Before Bossman hits him, here’s Austin for the save.

The Rock vs. Mark Henry

If Rock loses or doesn’t win by pin or submission, he’s out of a job. Vince and company are still at ringside. Apparently if Rock wins he’s also back in the tournament. After three times playing his music, here’s Rock in workout gear. Rock jumps Henry and fires off right hands. Rock hits some elbows to the chest and they head to the floor. Henry gets in a low blow and back inside we go.

Henry works on the back of Rock, despite the BIG FREAKING HEAD INJURY he had earlier in the night. Then again no one ever accused Henry of being a genius. Rock comes back with a suplex but Henry takes his head off with a clothesline. An elbow drop gets two and it’s time for a bearhug. Rock fights out of it and they clothesline each other down. Some clotheslines get two for Rock and with Brown up on the apron for some reason, Rock hits Henry low.

Henry comes back with a powerslam for a close two and now Bossman and Brown both get up on the apron. Somehow Bossman cuffs himself to the ring and Rock DDTs Henry for two but Brown pulls the referee out. There’s the Rock Bottom and the People’s Elbow but there’s still no referee. Shane runs out and counts the pin just to tick Vince off even more.

Rating: C-. The match was nothing of note here but the place was on fire for Rock. That’s what amazes me more and more as far as Sunday goes. Henry was his usual self here but Rock is strong enough to do something with a guy the size of Henry. Rock is one of those guys that can make ANYTHING entertaining and that’s what he did here. The head injury pretty much disappeared though.

Post match Rock beats up Vince and leaves him laying with a Rock Bottom.

Overall Rating: C+. This show’s wrestling was hit or miss but it was certainly entertaining. The tournament is way bigger than it needed to be as for the most part there were about six people (and that’s a stretch) who had a chance at winning the title. The show on Sunday would change things for the next several months, but dang it would get fun.

Here’s Survivor Series if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/articles/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1998-deadly-game-the-tournament-not-hhh

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Vengeance 2002
Date: July 21, 2002
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detriot, Michigan
Attendance: 12,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

So at this time, the Brand Split has just happened, although this is still a double branded show. The main feud is Rock vs. Angle vs. Taker. Just glancing at the card, this show more or less sucks. Other than that, there just isn’t much here. Cena’s PPV debut is here if that helps anything at all. Van Dam vs. Lesnar could be ok I guess. Uh yeah let’s just get to this as I’m not sure how it’s going to go.

Should be noted that in April of this year, Orton debuted. In May Batista debuted, and in June, about a month prior to this, Cena debuted. Not bad for a three months period is it?

The opening video is based on a passage from the Bible of all things. Oh I forgot. Bischoff made his WWF debut around this time. Oh sorry. It’s WWE now. Really short though.

Tazz and Cole threatened JR and King and therefore they get to call half of the show due to JR and King not wanting to deal with a pair of idiots like them.

BubbaRayDudley/SpikeDudleyvs. ChrisBenoit/EddieGuerrero

This is an elimination match. Since D-Von got sent to Smackdown and is now a preacher (with a deacon named Batista), Spike and Bubba are more or less the new Dudley Boys. Yeah it didn’t work and at I think Survivor Series they put D-Von and Bubba back together. Eddie’s mullet is insane here. Benoit gets a decent pop. I’ve always liked how Fink said Benoit. Absolutely no reason for these guys fighting has been given yet.

Tazz says the Dudleys have tables all over their yard and porch. That’s kind of an amusing visual. Also, it’s stuff like that that is dead in wrestling today. It’s ridiculous, but it gives their characters a sense of kayfabe realism. Today, they’re just two guys that like putting people through tables. Here, they still have a bit of the crazed hillbillies in them which is what made them awesome in the first place. Benoit was hurt at KOTR 2001 so he’s back full time now.

See, that’s the kind of stuff we need to be told in case we’re not up to date. You know, information like WHY THEY’RE FIGHTING! Later in the fall, Bubba would get to feud with HHH over the world title of all things. To say they were low on ideas at this point is an understatement. With no tables involved yet, Cole is surprised that Benoit and Eddie are controlling this.

In other words, Cole is surprised that Benoit and Eddie are out-wrestling the Dudley Boys. WOW. Taz starts a sentence with “Those of you out there that haven’t been put through a table.” That sums up why I don’t have to make fun of it, even though it was made in a joking manner. HHH decides on Raw or Smackdown tonight. Ok then. Also, four ECW guys in there. But yeah Vince, ECW didn’t have much influence on WWE today. None at all.

Spike runs in for a modified Poetry in Motion that was pretty nice. This has been ALL Radicalz. Yes I know that’s not their name anymore so save your annoying comments. Bubba spears Spike to save him from going through a table. We’re about ten minutes into this and no one is eliminated yet. Spike does a double stomp to the ribs of Benoit from the top rope.

There’s no way that doesn’t hurt no matter how well you get ready for it. Bubba misses his back splash through the table but it doesn’t count since it wasn’t via an offensive move. They’ve been consistent with that so I can buy it. Spike reverses a suplex into a Dudley Dog on Eddie to eliminate him.

They kind of mess up the landing though as Eddie goes ribs first into it and doesn’t hit the ground with his body. Ow I think. Benoit hits a gorilla press on Spike (think about that for a second) and it’s one on one. And Bubba wins it with a Bubba Bomb.

Rati…..BUBBA DUDLEY JUST BEAT CHRIS BENOIT ON PAY PER VIEW??? WHAT IN THE WORLD IS THAT NONSENSE? SPIKE DUDLEY JUST BEAT EDDIE GUERRERO ON PPV??? I MUST HAVE EATEN SOME TAINTED YAK GUTS OR SOMETHING BECAUSE THIS ISN’T HAPPENING!!!

Rating: D+. It was long and had some drama, but in what non-existent universe should the Dudleys beat Eddie and Benoit in ANY kind of match? Someone explain this to me. Also, NO EXPLANATION of why they’re fighting at all. This was just a bizarre fifteen minutes if there ever has been a bizarre fifteen minutes. I’m legit stunned.

Bischoff says he’s here to sign the most ruthless athlete he knows of: HHH. Oh let it begin. He’s going into the Smackdown GM’s office. The Smackdown GM at the moment: Stephanie. I’d love to see HHH trying to get them to compete for his services. Three round competition: karate, lingerie, mud wrestling. Hey, tell me Stephanie wouldn’t look hot in a gi.

CruiserweightTitle: JamieNoblevs. BillyKidman

At this point, the belt means jack. It’s the guy wins title after being on “an impressive roll as of late”, holds it for like three months while never defending it, another guy goes “on an impressive roll as of late” and normally he wins the title. This would be the first major, and I use that term more loosely than Lita after a bottle of Jack, title defense for Noble though, so there’s more or less no way he loses here.

That and I reviewed the match where he did lose it already so yeah this isn’t in any doubt at all. Wow absolutely no one cares here. We get the line about Noble not being your traditional cruiserweight as he uses a ground based attack and isn’t a high flier. Well duh, he’s a heel champion. Has there ever been a high flier that’s a heel? Only an idiot would book that? Kidman goes up top. I wonder if he’s about to GET READY TO FLY.

I really could not be less interested in this. Yet I’m writing a review of it. There’s something extremely wrong with me I think. How in the world did Noble win the ROH Title for a month? Was that like a massive rib or something? Noble messes up Kidman’s shoulder to try to make people care. To be fair, Kidman gets some pops in there.

Oh some guy named Rey Mysterio debuts Thursday. So four months you got Ortn, Cena, Batista and Mysterio. Not bad. Kidman doesn’t tap to an armbar. Kidman goes for an enziguri. It lands on Noble’s back. Wow this is making my head hurt. Shooting Star misses and Noble rolls him up for two. Noble hits a Tiger Bomb to end this.

Rating: D+. Not bad, but seriously, no one really cared. This just filled in about 8 minutes and wasn’t that good at all. More or less a nothing match that went nowhere at all. Not that it was terrible or anything, but no point at all.

Angle says he’ll win tonight but does so in a comedic manner. He makes economy jokes based on Detroit. Wow that’s odd. Heyman and Lesnar interrupt and a rivalry is set up. Lesnar has the title shot at Summerslam. Brock was still the silent killer at the moment. Angle’s character has slowly grown on me over the years. He’s so happy go lucky and joking but he can whip so much ass in the ring that it’s ok.

EuropeanTitle: WilliamRegalvs. JeffHardy

Hardy is champion here for no reason whatsoever. Maybe the reason is he pinned the European Champion in a title match. Ah apparently it was to Hardy on Raw a few weeks back. He cried after losing the title. Cole of course makes fun of him. Jeff gets a big old pop even at this point. The fans can’t stand Regal at all. He always was a good guy for getting heat. Hardy does that dropkick through the middle and bottom ropes that he does but leaves it short.

Hardy messing up a move. Who would have guessed that? Whisper in the Wind doesn’t have a name yet. Oh and Jess is wearing body paint now. Swanton lands on the knees. That must hurt badly. Hardy gets a weird looking rollup from nowhere to retain. Seriously he was getting his head kicked in and then was rolling him up. Nice ending….I think. Regal freaks again afterwards.

Rating: D+. I know I’ve used that a lot here but it’s what comes up. Just a weird match to put it mildly. It was just random with Regal dominating most of the match but losing out of nowhere. The fans popped big for Hardy though so I can’t complain there.

Flair congratulates Hardy. Hogan is here too. These three are in the same company 8 years later and two of them are legends here. See something wrong there? Hogan says he might use a Swanton later. Flair says what he thinks Ross would say. It’s….not that funny. Hogan says he’s worried about Vince appointing Eric and Stephanie as GMs of THEIR company. Flair was still onscreen owner here, so what the heck is Hogan talking about HIS company?

Flair says he’s worried for the young guys. Oh that’s PRICELESS. You hear all of the political stuff coming, and you have to wonder why they have no problem talking about their bosses like this with a camera looking right at them. That’s wrestling though so I can go with it.

JohnCenavs. ChrisJericho

So Cena had debuted like a month before this and had nearly beaten Kurt Angle in a challenge match. Jericho is heel here mind you. Not bad for a debut feud. Jericho couldn’t beat him three days ago so he beat the tar out of him with a chair. Yeah Jericho not being able to beat Cena. I’m stunned too. Cena has generic rock theme #849B here. Oh and he’s from Boston here. Also he’s wearing red shorts with a white stripe up the side. It was a very different time.

He wouldn’t be a rapper for a few months. This is a totally different guy than you’re used to. He’s not that good in the ring, he has NO heat, and I don’t think he has an actual signature or finishing move. Jericho kicks his head off with a spinning heel kick. I love that move. More or less Cena is just trying to survive here. Random note but TNA started about a month before this. Lionsault misses and Cena gets two on a rollup. Jericho getting ticked off is a thing of beauty.

Lionsault hits but he doesn’t cover like an idiot. Cena counters the Walls into a rollup for a quick pin. See what I mean by not having a finisher? And remember, Jericho was main eventing Mania three and a half months earlier.

Rating: C-. TV level match here but this is far more of a signature moment than anything else. Jericho put him over clean here and you can’t ask for much more. This wasn’t bad at all, and given Cena’s experience at this point, there was only so high they could take this. Also, Cena beats Jericho again.

Bischoff and Coach are waiting outside Stephanie’s office where HHH has been for awhile. Her lawyer goes in. I don’t care.

JR and King take over on commentary.

RVD is stretching. So is Lesnar. BUYRATE BABY!

We recap them, which more or less is Lesnar is awesome and beats up everybody he fights. He beat RVD to win KOTR. That’s about it.

IntercontinentalTitle: BrockLesnarvs. RobVanDam

Ok so make that Cena, Orton, Batista, Mysterio and Lesnar in four months. Think this was a good time for the company? Heyman was perfect in this role. Although I do wonder why knowing Heyman’s money history Lesnar would let him handle his contracts. Makes little sense. Van Dam is OVER. Oh yeah he’s the hometown boy here. Brock uses an FU about 4 seconds in and since he’s not John Cena, it does nothing. Yeah Lesnar’s strength is nothing compared to Cena’s.

Van Dam gets some solid shots in on Lesnar that makes things believable at least. Weird to think that both of these guys are world champions today, almost eight years later. Lesnar hits a powerslam on the floor. Freaking OW! Ross thinks Van Dam has the advantage in speed in quickness. My head hurts from announcers at times.

We hit the bear hug with Brock in control. Van Dam cues up his comeback with Heyman’s advice being DON’T LOSE! F5 is countered into a DDT. Five Star connects but Heyman pulls the referee out. Yep, it’s a weak DQ. The referee beats up Heyman for no apparent reason. F5 to RVD post match.

Rating: C+. The key thing here was they had to protect both guys and that’s what they did. Van Dam keeps the title and had Lesnar beat, but Lesnar didn’t get pinned. It’s a nice deal because as they said, Lesnar had nothing at all to lose here. This was fine for what it was.

Let’s waste more time outside Stephanie’s office because it worked so well last time. Stephanie walks out and she’s not happy looking. She says he signed. Ok then. HHH walks out and Bischoff yells at him. Apparently he signed divorce papers. He hasn’t decided on who to sign with yet.

BigShowvs. BookerT

This is no DQ for no apparent reason. Maybe we’ll GET AN EXPLANATION HERE! No count outs either which I would have though was self-explanatory. Ah here’s an explanation. Show beat up Booker on Raw to culminate their feud. SO WHY ARE THEY FIGHTING??? Booker is in blue here which is oddly working for him. Apparently Show wanted the stipulations here. Oh and Show is in his one piece swimsuit again.

He would be the first guy to beat Lesnar. Wow. He’s just big, slow and bad here. We hear WWF here which would be a big issue today. If nothing else Show looks funny, although I don’t think that was their intention. Booker gets a good monitor shot into the head of Show on the floor. We now get one of the most contrived spots I can remember in a long time.

After that monitor shot, Booker gets on the other end of the tables and Show just happens to stay in perfect position for the axe kick. So if he hadn’t stood like that, what would Booker have done instead? That’s what I mean by contrived. We go back in and an axe kick and the Houston Hangover (front flip into a leg drop from the top) gets a clean pin. This was borderline squash.

Rating: D+. Not very good and that awful spot killed it for me. This was just random and it came off badly. Booker went on the hottest streak of his life just after this, culminating in being fed to HHH at Mania 19. This was just a weird one though.

Torrie and Dawn Marie are at The World, the newly named WWF New York. This was pointless.

And here’s HHH. Yeah, after about a month off or so, it’s time to talk about what his career plans are. Oh freaking JOY. Apparently he’s the biggest name in wrestling. Ok then. And we’re into HHH is awesome time now. Ross says he coined the phrase Cerebral Assassin months ago. Yeah that’s why they were using it OVER A YEAR AGO at Mania 17. Before he can talk though, here’s Bischoff. Once his theme song ends, his video keeps playing. Ok then.

Bischoff’s main pitch is he’s all business rather than personal. He offers HHH movie roles etc. He almost calls HHH a WCW Superstar. That was almost funny. He’s getting a shoe deal too. And here’s Stephanie of course. The weak rap/hip hop song for her just fails though. Wow Stephanie trying to be tough always FAILS. Oh yeah, and she cannot talk at all. They were unstoppable apparently.

You know, until they got, you know, stopped. Eric and Stephanie go back and forth for a bit with Stephanie mentioning that Eric once said HHH had no talent or charisma. WOW this is making my head hurt. Now HHH talks for awhile. This is just painfully bad. He sticks his hand out to Eric. He doesn’t shake it. He says he’d rather go with the devil he knows rather than the one he doesn’t. And here’s HBK who just left the NWO. Yeah that was just stupid.

The NWO had more or less been threatening to force HHH to join them on Raw. OH THAT’S RIGHT! Booker and Show were fighting because they were in the NWO together and Shawn said Booker was the reason the team sucked so Big Show started fighting Booker. This era sucked.

The NWO is gone now as they realized the thing was just stupid at this point. Shawn talks him into coming back to Raw. HHH turned heel the next night and beat up Shawn. This is ten minutes I’ll never get back. Gah it’s not over yet. Stephanie and Eric have to talk a bit more.

Rikishi says he’s surprised about HHH. This was pointless.

Booker and Goldust get asked about HHH. Booker says bring him on. Goldust makes a bad sex joke.

We recap the 4th of July tag title change. Edge was a childhood Hulkamaniac so they just randomly won the tag titles. Christian and Lance Storm were the UnAmericans at the time, so the REAL CANADIAN Edge and Hogan defended the country. Yeah it was stupid.

TagTitles: LanceStorm/Christianvs. HulkHogan/Edge

This isn’t going to be fun is it? I think the tag titles went on both brands at the time but I’m not sure. Yeah they did. Ross then explains that Toronto is in Canada. Ok then. It’s also the Hendrix music for Hogan. Yes let’s pay a commercial artist for music when WE OWN THE MOST FAMOUS SONG IN WRESTLING HISTORY! He follows that up by TWICE, yes TWICE saying that Hogan fought Warrior at Mania 3. WOW.

I knew that when I was 4 years old. Hogan vs. Christian starts. That’s a weird thing to see: Hogan fighting a guy that’s young and talented that hasn’t been elevated up yet. Dang how out of place does Hogan look here? If you get another talented guy in there, you could have a pretty interesting tag match. Or like this: Edge vs. Lance Storm. That sounds perfectly entertaining. This however, just isn’t interesting. Also, within about two months, Hogan has won the tag and world titles.

He’s like what, 50 at this point? Is there a reason to give him such title runs here? I can almost guarantee you that Edge will get pinned here if they lose the belts. Naturally Edge is the one getting beaten down. Hogan comes in and Christian goes for that diving reverse DDT of his. Hogan botches the HECK out of it. You know, because it’s such a hard move to take isn’t it? Leg drop to Christian but Storm makes the save.

Hogan doesn’t take the superkick from Storm right either. Edge comes in to clean house while Hogan looks for a pudding pack or something. And there goes the referee. Test runs down to beat up Hogan and Edge. Storm covers Edge for only two. Wow that surprised me. Rikishi of all people comes down to beat up Test. Sure why not?

Christian distracts the referee and JERICHO comes out to nail Edge with a title belt for the ending. Wow it only took four guys to get the belt off of Hogan and he didn’t even get pinned. That might be a new record low for Hogan. Naturally, this title that Hogan was so proud of was never mentioned again and he never went after it again.

Rating: D. Just bad and Hogan looked awful out there. Four guys to get the title off of Hogan. He botches a ton of spots, and he doesn’t even let Storm or Christian get to say they pinned Hogan. Yeah, this is definitely about the young guys. Can’t you see that?

Bischoff tries to get Angle onto Raw. Smart if nothing else.

Stephanie threatens to rip the heart out of Raw. Not sure what she means but she did get the IC Title to Smackdown. Pay no attention to the fact that the belts were unified soon after and we had the idiotic year where there were only world champions. Yeah it was stupid.

We recap the triple threat main event. Rock had a title shot for no apparent reason and there’s the famous Taker taps out while pinning Angle thing. Replays in slow enough motion show Taker tapping before the three hit the mat but whatever. It was a draw but whatever. That actually happened at UFC 34 in a Matt Hughes fight.

He was in a triangle choke and tried to slam the guy into the mat. He did so and won by knockout, but he was out from the choke. Taker suggested doing it to set up this angle. But no Vince, UFC which today is light years ahead of what it was back then has no impact on wrestling at all.

UndisputedTitle: TheRockvs. KurtAnglevs. Undertaker

So Rock is officially an actor now but he’s here for no adequately explained reason. That would come at Summerslam though. It’s your standard triple threat so far with Angle and Rock doing the heavy lifting early on. Taker goes for the chokeslam on Rock but Rock does it to him. In other words he did a Rock Bottom but didn’t go down with him. They show a close up replay and I forgot it was a chokeslam. Rock puts the ankle lock on Angle and Angle hits him with a Rock Bottom.

Taker hits an Angle Slam on Angle as we have a nice little sequence there. That wasn’t bad at all. I love it when Taker grabs a guy by the throat and throws them into the corner to punch the heck out of them. We do the standard one guy goes down and the other two fight for awhile. It does help as you can get three one on ones rather than a threeway so that’s good. Angle is bleeding. Not a bad cut either. He gets beaten back and forth between both guys.

Not bad, but this needs to pick things up a little. Oh look the referee is down and his leg hurts. Oh ok he’s already up again. Angle takes both guys out and covers Taker which is stupid as he was put down first. Taker hits the Last Ride but Angle gets the ankle lock. We use the same finish from Smackdown but now Rock is in the ankle lock. We’re fully into the whole finisher marathon segment here and it’s boring.

Rock Bottom to Taker gets two as Angle is down. Angle Slam to Taker but the Rock Bottom to Angle ends it. Meh. I would have been more interested if I didn’t know the winner beforehand. And I didn’t know because of this being 8 years ago. I knew because of the Rock/Lesnar poster they accidentally released two weeks before Rock won the title.

Rating: B-. Not bad, but DANG the whole nothing but finishers for the last 5 minutes got annoying. Rock jobbing to Lesnar was good and this set that up so I can’t complain much there. Angle was a nice placeholder I guess but this just wasn’t anything special at all. Seeing Taker do an Angle Slam was cool though. Just nothing special at all.

Overall Rating: D+. Nothing special here at all. This was a totally uninteresting show from start to finish with no great matches and 15 minutes going to HHH saying Raw rather than a long match in between. Thankfully this was the end of Hogan’s time around titles but man this was boring. The whole show just came off as uninteresting and like a waste of time. Take a pass here, although the triple threat is watchable.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 5, 2001
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum, Uniondale, New York
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

We’re two weeks away from Survivor Series and we have most of the teams set for the Winner Take All match. Angle jumped ship last week to further WWF-ize the Alliance roster. The WWF is in chaos right now and the main event tonight is Jericho vs. Rock for the WCW Title because the person that holds that title is really going to help the WWF in their war right? Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Test and Booker T beating Jericho and Rock for the tag titles, taking away the only reason they had to not kill each other.

We actually hear about Rebellion, the British PPV, where Rock and Jericho got in yet ANOTHER fight.

Here’s Vince to open the show of course. He immediately makes Jericho vs. Rock for the WCW Title later tonight so we’re automatically off to a better start than most of his promos. He wants them to beat each other up once and for all so that they can concentrate on Survivor Series. On to more important things though, as Vince says that at Survivor Series, someone is going to jump to the WWF. Apparently it’s going to be Austin. Well they certainly took the swerve out of that swerve pretty quickly.

Cue Austin who tells Vince to shut up. He didn’t believe Vince when he started and then he heard the name Steve Austin. Austin said what and wondered who Vince thought he was. He doesn’t like Vince implying that he’s jumping ship back to the WWF. Earlier Vince said he had to be Vince McMahon so Austin says he has to be himself and Stuns Vince. Austin leaves and Vince is smiling a lot.

Back from a break and the Alliance glares at Austin who says he’s not turning his back on them.

Ivory vs. Lita

It has to be better than Stacy’s match last week. Another good pop for Lita too. Ivory jumps her during the posing and takes over quickly. Legdrop gets two and Ivory stomps away some more. Lita comes back with a tilt-a-whirl slam for two. Ivory sends her into the buckle and hits a bad bulldog for the same result. This is really dull so far. Flapjack gets two for Ivory. I think Lita starts her comeback with a headscissors and leg sweep for two. Lita hits perhaps the worst clothesline I’ve ever seen as Matt and Lance Storm come out. After they do nothing of note, Ivory hits an X-Factor for the pin.

Rating: D-. What in the world was the point of this? The girls were almost wrestling in slow motion and the crowd was DEAD. That clothesline was so bad that it made some of the ones I’ve seen NFL guys use that were better. Hardy and Storm didn’t add anything and the match was just bad. It’s probably the worst Lita match I’ve ever seen.

Shane comes in to see Austin and Austin doesn’t like having to defend himself against accusations. Shane thinks someone is jumping ship at the PPV and he thinks he knows who that is. Angle comes in and Shane looks at him, prompting Angle to say that he doesn’t think Austin will jump. Kurt asks Austin if he has his back against Undertaker tonight. Austin wants to know where the hat Austin gave him is. Steve doesn’t like it but he has Kurt’s back tonight.

Intercontinental Title: Edge vs. Test

Edge challenged Test last night on Heat for some reason. He jumps Test on the floor to start and they head back inside for a lot of punches from both guys. Edge tries to speed things up but walks into a tilt-a-whirl slam for two as Test takes over again. After a suplex Test chokes away with the boot in the corner but walks into a spear out of nowhere. Both guys are down and it’s Edge up first.

He hits the spinwheel kick but walks into an elbow to put him down. The big boot misses and the Edge-O-Matic gets two. Edge rolls through a powerbomb for two and hits a tornado DDT for the same. He goes up again but Test shoves the referee into the ropes to crotch the champion. Test cradles Edge and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. The match was about as good as a five and a half minute match with practically no story (Test cost Edge a match last week apparently) was going to be. That’s beside the point though. At this point in WWF, there were three midcard titles (IC, US and Euro), two world titles, two tag titles, a hardcore title and two lightweight titles.

This change means nothing because Edge would just pick up the US Title a week later and unify the two midcard ones at the PPV. These title changes don’t mean anything as Edge had only held the belt 13 days so it’s not like this was the end of a long reign or something. At the end of the day, so what if Test is IC Champion? He would lose it in two weeks anyway. Oh and he’s a double champion now too.

Speaking of pointless title changes, Christian won the European Title from Bradshaw. Yeah he was European Champion for like a week. Christian defends against Hurricane tonight so here’s reporter Gregory Helms who wants to know how Christian can be considered the greatest European Champion ever when he hasn’t faced Hurricane. Helms says you might not like Hurricane when he’s angry.

Vince has an ice pack on his neck when Rock comes in. Rock wants to know what’s up with that (sorry, had Hurricane on my mind) Austin thing earlier. Vince should bring Austin back because Rock has been waiting.

European Title: Christian vs. Hurricane

So is Hurricane WWF now? Did I miss something? Christian wears a Diamondbacks jersey to rub in the World Series loss to the New York crowd. Apparently Christian won the title back on Smackdown in a dark match. See how crowded this company was around this point? Christian jumps him to start as the fans chant for the Yankees.

He pounds away and hooks an abdominal stretch but Hurricane arm drags out of it. Hurricane puts the cape on and hits the cross body for two. Christian throws him over the top but the challenger lands on his feet. Superkick gets two for Hurricane. Eye of the Hurricane is countered and the Unprettier ends this. Short and nothing.

Ad for the WWF on the Weakest Link, which was a quiz show back in the early 2000s.

Regal addresses the Alliance and says Austin won’t defect. Booker thinks RVD is going to defect so Regal makes a match between them later on.

Angle is getting ready when Stephanie comes up to him. She says she trusts him and they share a look. This would go nowhere.

US Title: Undertaker vs. Kurt Angle

Taker jumps him on the floor to start and drops some elbows for two. He takes him down in an attempt at an armbar but Angle gets to the ropes. Taker does the wristlock lift followed by a modified short arm scissors. Old School puts Angle down again but Kurt goes for the legs. He rams it into the apron a few times as Taker is being chopped down. The announcers are talking about Austin of course because the match is good, and that’s not something we can talk about.

Back in and a chop block puts Taker down. If I remember right this is around the time that Angle made Kane tap so the idea of Taker tapping isn’t that insane. Ankle lock goes on but Taker kicks away very quickly. A suplex gets two on Taker and it’s off to a front facelock. Taker is like screw this and picks Angle up for a chokeslam. He lifts the bad leg which helps a bit. Angle pops back up because the move didn’t have the same snap to it which is fine. Ankle lock goes on for a good while until Taker reverses into one of his own….and here’s Austin for the DQ.

Rating: B-. I was digging this one with Taker actually selling and the thinking being there with stuff like the lifting of the leg. The ending was about as obvious as you could get given what was said earlier, but at least the match was good up to that point. This is one of the better TV matches in a good while on this show.

Angry Angle says Austin is loyal to the Alliance (man there’s a lot of alliteration tonight). Cole suggests that what Austin just did is the same thing Angle would do to remove suspicion. Angle has to think about that one.

APA/Jacqueline vs. Dudley Boys/Stacy Keibler

This is a tables match. The Dudleys bring out the table with Stacy laying on it in a nice touch. Bradshaw and D-Von start us off because you have to tag in a match that only ends with people going through tables. The girls come in and after some cheating, Jackie gets stomped on. Everything breaks down and Bradshaw breaks up What’s Up on Farrooq before hitting a fallaway slam off the top to D-Von.

The APA brings in a table but Bubba breaks up Bradshaw’s superplex attempt on D-Von. Bubba’s powerbomb doesn’t work as Farrooq moves the table. Jackie hits Bubba low and D-Von takes the Clothesline from Bradshaw. Bubba sets up another table but has to stop to deal with Jackie. Farrooq hits the spinebuster to put Bubba through the table for the win.

Rating: D. What in the world did this match exist for? Was there a story to it that just wasn’t worth talking about? Wasn’t Bradshaw a singles champion last week at this time? Either way the match didn’t go anywhere because no one cared about it and the girls didn’t add anything either. This was pure, uninteresting filler and nothing more.

Rock says Jericho won the big one once, so let’s see you do it again tonight.

The new team of Billy and Chuck is at WWF New York.

Wrestlemania tickets went on sale this past weekend.

Hardcore Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Booker T

Regal is on commentary for some reason. Booker takes him down almost immediately but Van Dam gets a knockdown of his own. Spinwheel kick gets two for RVD, who is defending if that isn’t clear. Van Dam’s top rope kick puts Booker down and Rolling Thunder gets two. Tajiri comes out to beat up Regal but Booker goes out to make the save. Regal gets up and powerbombs Tajiri on the floor as Big Show comes in to clean house. The referee rings the bell and throws out the HARDCORE match. See why this whole period is considered such a mess?

Jericho says he was born on Long Island which doesn’t get much of a reaction at all. He’ll win tonight.

Desire video.

WCW World Title: The Rock vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is defending here. He slaps Rock to start and knocks him into the corner. Rock comes back with a jumping clothesline but Jericho takes him right back down again. A Samoan Drop gets two for Rock. Jericho comes back again with a middle rope dropkick for two. Rock Bottom is countered as are the Walls. Jericho dropkicks him to the floor and follows him out. This has been very back and forth so far.

Rock gets dropped on the barricade but Jericho gets crotched coming back in. A superplex brings the champion back in but it only gets two. They slug it out and Rock clotheslines him down for two. A Jericho DDT puts both guys down and Jericho hits a swinging neckbreaker for two. A backbreaker puts Rock down and Jericho chops away. The champ tries a dropkick but gets caught in the Sharpshooter.

Jericho makes the rope but walks into the spinebuster. The People’s Elbow gets loaded up but Jericho moves out of the way. Rock takes a Rock Bottom from Jericho but it only gets two. Jericho throws him to the floor and then into the steps for good measure. The champ loads up the announce table and hits the Breakdown through said table, with Rock’s head being a good six inches away from contact.

Rock is bleeding a bit as Jericho takes off the buckle pad. For some reason the referee never counted at all. Back in and Jericho sends him into the exposed buckle which doesn’t even put Rock down onto the mat. There are the Walls and after a good awhile Rock makes the rope. Jericho goes for the hold again and gets rolled up for the pin and the title for the Rock.

Rating: B. This was good but it was the abridged version of their match at No Mercy, which was much better by a few thousand miles. Jericho losing here doesn’t really make a lot of sense as he could hold the title over Rock but now there’s almost nothing at all that he can brag about. That would be somewhat resolved post match but I don’t get the idea here for the most part.

Jericho blasts Rock with a chair shot to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was almost all about building to the PPV which is a good idea, but when the build isn’t that good it doesn’t really mean much. I’d also like to point out that we’re 13 days away from the PPV and we have one match announced. The idea is supposed to be that Austin is going to jump but there isn’t much you can do to build to that before Survivor Series. This was a better show than lately but it still was nothing great.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 29, 2001
Location: Freedom Hall, Louisville, Kentucky
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

With Survivor Series only a few weeks away, we really have no idea what to expect from the show. None of the matches have been announced, the kind of match that the Winner Take All match is totally unclear, and we have no idea who is going to be in it. We practically have to fill in some blanks by the end of the night. Then again there’s a good chance the WWF didn’t know anything about the PPV at this point either. Let’s get to it.

We open with Vince bringing out the WWF roster. Vince talks about how the Alliance will die at Survivor Series, but there’s something else to get to first. On Smackdown, Shane held Linda’s arms back while Stephanie slapped her. Tonight in the street fight, Vince will teach Shane some respect. Vince introduces Team WWF for the ten man elimination tag team match. Well we have some details now. Vince brings Undertaker, Kane, Kurt Angle, Chris Jericho and The Rock.

Cue Stephanie who shows us a video from Smackdown where Linda got slapped by Stephanie, apparently into unconsciousness. Stephanie says that if they’ll do that to their mom, what are they going to do to Vince and the WWF at Survivor Series? She dedicates the street fight tonight to Linda. Cue Shane, with Stephanie dancing to his music. There’s something creepy about that. Shane says someone from Team WWF is defecting to the Alliance tonight.

Post break Shane and Stephanie are excited about someone turning tonight. Even Regal and Debra don’t know who it is.

Intercontinental Title: Edge vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam is Hardcore Champion but here’s challenging here. Feeling out process to start and Edge this his flapjack to take over. The monkey flip is countered by the Canadian but he walks into the stepover kick. JR calls Edge Test for some reason and we go to the outside. Van Dam hits the Five Star off the apron but he can’t get Edge back in to cover. Back in and Edge gets in a clothesline followed by a backdrop.

Spinwheel kick takes Van Dam down but one from RVD takes Edge down in turn. Split legged moonsault hits knees and they trade near falls on some rollups. Van Dam channels his inner HBK with a superkick and Rolling Thunder gets two. Edge-O-Matic gets the same and we’re almost at a standstill. Van Dam rolls into the corner but gets speared down for two. The Five Star hits knees and the Edgecution gets the pin to retain.

Rating: C+. This was fine. Edge was a rising star at this point and a clean win over a guy that was a bigger deal than he was at this point was only going to help him. That’s what you call a rub from Van Dam and it’s something that we could use more of in today’s product. This worked pretty well all things considered and if I remember right they would have better matches in the future.

Austin laughs at Van Dam losing when Taz comes in and wants to know who the jumper is. He gets why Debra doesn’t know but why not Taz? Austin implies Taz speaks Spanish and throws him out. Taz came off like a clueless schmuck here. He leaves and Austin still won’t tell Debra.

The APA says they’re going to beat up the jumper tonight. Saturn is playing Go Fish too. Teddy comes in and says Jericho has called a meeting of the WWF guys which the APA isn’t happy with.

Molly Holly/Hurricane vs. Torrie Wilson/Tajiri

Torrie is looking extra curvy tonight. The guys start us off and Tajiri takes over. Molly gets spun around too but Hurricane gets in a shot to Tajiri’s head to take over. Tajiri escapes a suplex but the high kick misses. Eye of the Hurricane is countered and there’s a hard kick to Hurricane’s face. The girls come in and Torrie shows off her “skills”. She stumbles through a handspring elbow and slaps Hurricane, only to get clotheslined down. Tarantula to Hurricane but Molly rolls up Torrie for the pin. Next.

We go to the meeting and Jericho is complaining about working in WCW in ECW. He isn’t about to stand around while the company gets screwed and wants to know who is going to screw the company. Rock pops up and Jericho makes fun of him for being late. Rock wants to know who Jericho thinks he is to call a meeting.

Jericho says he became the leader of the WWF when he beat Rock for the WCW Title. Does that sound as stupid to anyone else as it does to me? Rock says he was winning big ones when Jericho was losing to Juventud Guerrera on Nitro. Rock is the WWF and no one here is stupid enough to jump ship, other than maybe Jericho. The meeting is adjourned. Rock came off like a total jerk here which is the whole point of the feud. Good stuff here.

There was a Smack Down Your Vote rally today.

Austin criticizes the meeting when Regal comes in. Regal gets sent away but Austin tells him to send Angle here.

Jericho yells at the Brothers of Destruction so Taker yells at him. Jericho implies Kane is the one jumping.

Here’s DDP for a chat. JR makes fun of his teeth which isn’t really funny. Page says he has a surprise for us: he knows who is jumping. Apparently it can be anyone in the WWF, not just on Team WWF. Page says it’s Big Show and insults him a lot for some reason. Here’s Big Show with a chokeslam for Page. Can we PLEASE get Page an opponent not seven feet tall?

Angle comes in to see Vince about the meeting with Austin tonight. Kurt has no idea what Austin wants and then goes into a rant against Vince when Vince looks at him strangely. Vince gives him a 2×4 to take with him.

WWF Tag Titles: Booker T/Test vs. The Rock/Chris Jericho

Rock comes out last which is interesting. He starts with Booker and a Samoan Drop gets two. Off to Jericho who chops away and hits a middle rope dropkick for two. Booker comes back with a kind of Alabama Slam and it’s off to Test. The power guy takes over and pounds away in the corner before hitting a suplex for two. Off to a quick chinlock followed by a full nelson slam for two.

Book comes back in again and hits a slam for two. Jericho hits a kind of enziguri to break up the devastating slam based offense. The unhot tag brings in Rock who cleans house. He suplexes Booker and punches Test, but accidentally hits the tiny Canadian. Spinebuster looks to set up the Elbow but Jericho jumps Rock from behind.

Jericho hits him with the Breakdown (Skull Crushing Finale) but breaks up the count from Test. Test takes a Breakdown and now Chris wants the tag. Rock tags him and hits the Rock Bottom on the WCW Champion. He breaks up the pin by Test (Heyman: “WILL SOMEONE PLEASE MAKE UP THEIR MIND???”) and everything breaks down. Booker accidentally kicks Test’s head off and the Walls make Test tap.

Rating: C+. This was far more about drama and story building than the wrestling and that’s ok. Jericho vs. Rock was a huge feud and was completely awesome with both guys hitting on all cylinders. Rock continues to come off as a total jerk and Jericho continues to have the title, signifying that he beat Rock for the big one. Good stuff here.

Angle goes into Austin’s locker room with the 2×4 pulled back. Austin isn’t looking for a fight and offers Angle a spot in the Alliance right now. Angle: “What?” Angle asks who is joining the Alliance tonight and thinks it’s Rock. Austin won’t tell him who is jumping and only tells him good luck. Angle turns him down.

Rock is mad and Cole makes him madder by pointing out what Angle just implied. Rock goes a Kurt-Hunting.

Lita vs. Stacy Keibler

I could look at Dudley Stacy all day. Lita hits a quick side slam for two but Stacy comes back with her bad kicks. Snap suplex gets two for Lita and she throws Stacy to the floor, possibly resulting in an ankle injury. Lita dives at Stacy but hits the barricade. Matt comes out to put her back in and Stacy slaps him. Matt pulls back a right hand but elbows Lita in the process. That gets two for Stacy and a quick Twist of Fate gets the pin.

Lita yells at Matt post match and walks away from him.

Rock comes in and yells at Angle. He implies Kurt might be turning but Angle denies it, citing permission from Vince. Angle says it’s not him but Rock doesn’t seem convinced.

Mick Foley is at WWF New York and plugs his new children’s book. He agreed to make Jericho/Rock defend the titles in exchange for the Brothers getting a title match against the Dudleys.

My Sacrifice video. For those of you that don’t remember, My Sacrifice is a Creed song that was used for the WWF’s Desire campaign. What’s the Desire campaign you ask? No idea, but we saw it every five minutes at this point.

US Title: Kurt Angle vs. William Regal

This should be good. Angle is defending and Regal jumps him as he’s posing in the corner. Angle comes back with a series of clotheslines to take it to the floor. Back in and Angle backdrops him for two. Regal comes back with the knee trembler and a chinlock. Kurt tries a crossbody but Regal crotches him to counter. The champion comes back with some suplexes before picking the ankle for the submission.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here as you would expect more from Regal vs. Angle. The match was basically filler but it wasn’t a bad match or anything. Regal would keep doing nothing for a few months before doing nothing for years. Angle would stay in the main event for like ever and unfortunately these two never had a big match.

Vince comes in to see Taker but Taker yells at him for thinking Taker or Kane are jumping. Kane comes in and Vince gets caught between them. Vince says good luck but Taker says he doesn’t need it, which is the same thing Angle said earlier.

WCW Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Undertaker/Kane

The Dudleys are defending. Kane and D-Von get us going and the big man slugs him down very quickly. A side slam brings in Taker who beats up both Dudleys with ease. Ray low bridges the Dead Man and sends him into the steps to give the Dudleys control. Ray clotheslines him down back inside and brings in D-Von again.

Kane gets drilled so there’s no Fried Freak for Undertaker to tag. Taker kicks Ray down and it’s a double tag to D-Von and Kane. Everything breaks down and Kane chokeslams D-Von. Stacy slips Bubba a belt which takes Kane’s head off for two. Taker loads up Old School but Bubba sends Kane into the ropes to crotch Undertaker. 3D pins Kane to keep the titles in Dudleyville.

Rating: D+. These matches continue to kind of suck, which is a running theme for both this and the 1998 series. I think the ending here is supposed to go along with the idea of someone jumping as I guess Kane and Taker didn’t get along here but it wasn’t really that bad. Can we just look at Stacy more please?

Shane McMahon vs. Vince McMahon

Street fight. Shane meets him on the floor and Vince pounds him down onto the apron to start. Vince hits him with some sort of sign and sends Shane knees first into the steps. He chokes Shane with a cord and sends him inside. Vince throws in some garbage cans as Paul talks about Linda being an abusive mother. Shane comes back with a bad low blow and a series of garbage can lid shots.

Shane puts the garbage can on Vince’s chest and tries a Shooting Star but only hits can. You can’t say the guy didn’t try different stuff in the ring. Vince fires off some kendo stick shots and clotheslines Shane out to the floor. Vince loads up the announce table but Shane comes back with a monitor shot to the face. Unlike at Wrestlemania, this time the elbow puts Vince through the table in a great looking crash.

Everyone is down now as JR does his traditional panicking over a big move. Shane gets up first and tries to drag Vince back into the ring as his dad is dead weight. That only gets two and the fans aren’t all that thrilled by the kickout. Shane loads up the Coast to Coast but Vince throws the can into Shane on the way across the ring. Booker and Test run in to beat Vince down but the Brothers come in to even things out.

Test and Kane kick each other down and Booker takes the Last Ride. Regal takes out Taker but Rock beats him down. Austin comes out and Stuns Rock until Angle comes down with a chair….and hits the incoming Jericho. He hits every WWF guy and it’s Angle that is jumping. A horribly botched Stunner from Austin lets Shane get the pin.

Rating: C-. Obviously the match wasn’t the point here and it’s hard to grade the match after the parade of run-ins began. The ending worked pretty well with Angle being a nice surprise for the turn (kind of) and a good way to end the show. The match was a far cry from Wrestlemania’s version, but Freedom Hall is a far cry from the Astrodome.

The Alliance celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This is a very hard one to grade. The wrestling was just ok but there was some good drama with the mystery of who was jumping going on. That being said, Angle turning doesn’t really mean much. At the end of the day he’s another WWF mercenary being brought in to try to legitimize the Alliance which doesn’t work in the slightest. It’s a good shock moment but when that’s all you have, the show is going to suffer, which is what wound up happening.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 19, 1998
Location: Bradley Center, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Attendance: 12,157
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the night after Judgment Day and we’re about to start the build up to Survivor Series. Last night Austin screwed over both Undertaker and Kane in the main event, resulting in his firing to end the PPV last night. So in other words Vince has gotten the final win over Austin and the war is over isn’t it? I’m sure we’ll never see Austin again right? It’s such a great and peaceful world on Monday Night Raw anymore. Let’s get to it.

We open with a big celebration in the ring complete with jovial music, confetti and the whole roster being brought down to the ring. Here’s Vince in his wheelchair to say that he has an announcement about the WWF Championship. We have no champion right now so on the night of the Survivor Series, there’s going to be a new champion due to a sixteen man one night tournament.

As for last night, Austin was fired and we get a still of his face last night. Apparently Austin muttered something about hunting season, which Vince interprets as him hunting for a job. If Austin EVER wants to come into an arena again, he has to buy a ticket. Firing Austin last night felt better than sex. No one in the ring is bigger than Vince so they’ll never cross the boss right? The Austin 3:16 stuff is now a collector’s item because it’s all about McMahon 3:16. As Vince is about to leave, we get a shot of Austin in what looks like the parking lot with a gun.

Back from a break and Vince sends Bossman to get his family to get them out of town. The Stooges stay with him and Vince wants the cameraman here to document everything. Austin is seen in the back polishing his rifle.

X-Pac vs. Ken Shamrock

Shamrock is the IC Champion and Pac is European Champion but this is non-title. DX hung out with Motley Crue earlier today. Shamrock jumps him to start and kicks him down almost immediately. A kind of snap Jackhammer gets two as we cut to Vince who wants additional security. Shamrock cranks on a front facelock and here come two rent-a-cops. They take Chyna out and cuff her while reading her her rights. I believe this is called an arrest.

Thankfully Shamrock was smart enough to have a hold on while that was going on so the angle didn’t distract from the match. Once they’re gone Pac comes back with some kicks bu charges into a powerslam for two. The Bronco Buster is broken up and there’s the belly to belly. There’s the standing rana from Shamrock but here comes Mankind. Ken pulls him into the ring but gets caught in the Mandible Claw. Shamrock suplexes his way out of it but walks into the X Factor for the pin.

Rating: C. The best word to describe this match is eventful. There was a lot going on here and the match was probably the least important of those things. Shamrock would continue his heel turn soon after this which would probably be the right move for him. The match was really just a backdrop for the other events.

Chyna is taken away in a cop car when two security goons spot Austin. They ask him to get out of the truck and look at his gun. Austin signs an autograph for the guards’ kids and they leave him alone.

Vince panics and sends the cop with the attack dog after him. Cop: “I didn’t come here to risk my life. Screw you.” Brisco goes to find out what’s going on. This is hilarious.

Headbangers vs. Darren Drozdov/Animal

The Headbangers have foam title belts on and do the Outlaws’ intro. Animal and Mosh get us going with Animal getting in trouble quickly. He comes back with a powerslam for two as the announcers talk about the guard dog. Droz comes in and misses an elbow drop so the Headbangers double team him down. He comes back with a sitout powerbomb and everything breaks down. Hawk claps in support and Droz looks at him for some reason, allowing Thrasher to roll him up for the pin. That was all on Droz but Hawk gets the blame.

Patterson goes to get Vince coffee but Slaughter and Brisco go with him, leaving Vince alone.

Post break Mr. Socko and Foley come in to see Vince. Vince is very relieved to see him for once, but Foley says he wants to get to know Vince and have a sleepover. The look on Vince’s face is perfect.

Here’s Undertaker with Bearer which is a recent reunion. Taker says that Bearer has come home to lead his Ministry of Darkness. He doesn’t really give a reason for it but says you should just get it. Bearer is someone with vision and someone who understands the power of the darkness. We have the beginning of a new era now and there will be a plague unleashed on the WWF which will never be understood. Bearer says he used Kane because he’s weak and it started eight weeks ago. JR calls Bearer a rotund demon. Taker says he set the fire that burned Kane, so here’s the big fried freak himself.

Kane pushes out a casket and uses the voicebox to challenge Undertaker to a casket match tonight. Undertaker doesn’t say anything but Kane says that he’ll rest in peace. That was abrupt.

Foley thinks Vince should rehire Austin so Vince, Austin, Mankind and Socko can be the new Kliq. And now let’s play Twister! That’s enough to make Vince snap and he throws Foley out.

Steve Blackman vs. Jeff Jarrett

This is more famous as the WWF debut of Debra McMichael as Jarrett’s new manager. They start fast and we’re told that we’ll have the casket match tonight. Jarrett takes him down quickly and goes up but gets slammed down for two. Blackman misses a kick and Jarrett hits a neckbreaker to take Blackman down for two. A DDT gets no cover but Jarrett jumps into a kick to the ribs. A bicycle kick puts Jarrett down and here’s the Blue Blazer to jump Blackman and drawing the DQ.

Al Snow tries to make the save but Head is distracted by Debra, allowing Jarrett to hit Snow with the guitar.

The phone in Vince’s room rings but he isn’t sure whether he should answer it. Thankfully the phone is mic’d up so we can hear Austin saying he’s coming for Vince.

Back from a break and Vince is on the phone with his limo driver. The driver doesn’t see Austin so he must be in the building. Vince is going to try to make a fast getaway but has to look around every door. He can see the limo but Austin is on the other side of it. Vince tries to get away but Austin tells him to freeze. Austin wheels him back into the arena while carrying a hunting bow and arrow. Vince screams for mercy so Austin rams the bad ankle into walls. Austin: “I used to work at a hospital.” They go into Vince’s office and the door is shut.

Back and Austin is interrogating Vince about whether he’s ever gone hunting before. Vince says he’s been on a safari once but he only took pictures. Austin asks if the knife he has could kill an elephant.

The Rock vs. D’Lo Brown

Rock has some weird techno remix of his music here which didn’t last long at all. We hear that the Nation is officially split as Rock takes over quickly. A swinging neckbreaker gets a big pop but no cover. Henry gets on the apron allowing Rock to hit Brown low. Brown makes a quick comeback but gets run over by a clothesline. Henry cheats a bit and Brown takes over again. Rock comes back with a DDT for two and it’s People’s Elbow time, but the chest protector prevents the pain. Brown jumps into the Rock Bottom though and we’re done.

Rating: D+. Rock was clearly about to become a HUGE deal and they needed to do this quick feud to clarify that the Nation was done. Rock would be in the tournament at Survivor Series which was certainly where he belonged. The match was nothing of note but it got Rock on TV and that was the important idea.

Henry beats up Rock post match and hits him with the splash.

Austin asks Vince if he wants to know how sharp the knife is. Vince doesn’t say anything so Austin jumps to his feet to scare McMahon again. Austin says he’s having a swell time but he’s going to take Vince tonight. Vince says Austin will never get away with this which Austin seems annoyed by.

Here’s Tiger Ali Singh to be disgusting again. He talks about all of the gross stuff Americans eat and Babu is grilling sausages. Singh says he’ll pay $500 to anyone that can swallow a kielbasa. A chick comes in to swallow it but here’s Godfather who is now a pimp. Apparently the woman used to be one of his ho’s so she isn’t eligible, because she’s a professional. Godfather and Singh brawl and are pulled apart.

Austin shoots arrows at a poster and Vince is forced to look at it up close. Austin makes him hum the Deliverance theme and wants Vince to squeal like a pig. Vince LOUDLY oinks and we take a break.

Back with Austin talking about the movie Misery. Vince has a board between his legs just like in the movie. Austin tapes Vince’s mouth shut and then to the chair. He’s going to find a hammer.

Mankind vs. Val Venis

Goldust kicked Val in the balls last night so Val’s grinding doesn’t work that well. Mankind shoulders him down to start and we get a crisscross. Val’s groin messes up on him though so we have to settle for a headlock. Venis hits his following knees into a Russian legsweep for two. The idea here is that Val can only do so much without hurting himself even further. He tries a running hip attack while Foley is in 619 position but injures himself again. The double arm DDT sets up Socko but here’s Shamrock to hit Mankind in the knee with a chair. Val falls on top for the pin.

Rating: D. The match was about Val Venis’ groin. You figure out why I didn’t like it.

Mankind beats up Shamrock post match. They fight into the crowd and Mankind hits him with a chair. Goldust pops up on the screen and tells Val that it isn’t over. Terri whispers something to Val and he panics and leaves her in the ring. I think you know where this is going.

Austin says this isn’t about physical pain but rather getting back at him for last night’s humiliation. Vince isn’t going to feel a thing. Now Austin wants to watch TV. He asks if Vince remembers the show You Bet Your Life. Vince gets to pick either Undertaker or Kane in the upcoming match. Vince picks Kane, so Austin says if Kane wins it’s the easy way, but if it’s any other outcome, it’s the hard way which is the Austin way. That’s a call back to the promo that started this feud.

Undertaker vs. Kane

Casket match remember. It’s a brawl to start with Taker hitting the jumping clothesline for a cover before remembering what kind of match this is. A running DDT puts Kane down and they both sit up. Kane gets knocked into the casket but he pulls Taker in with him. Taker DDTs Kane down into the casket but the lid is shut with both of them inside. They fight inside of the casket and break the thing apart. Both guys get out and Kane goes after Bearer. Kane chases him off but Taker pops him in the back with a chair. We’ll call this a no contest somewhere in here.

Rating: D. I have no idea what the point of this was but it certainly plays into the final segment of the show. The ending sucked bad though because the whole thing was like four minutes long. There was nothing here but it would only get a lot more complicated very soon, which would dominate 1999.

Austin wheels Vince to the ring while Vince is crying for mercy. After awhile of JR and Jerry talking, here they come. Vince starts to cry so we see a clip from earlier in the night where Vince talked about how the Austin merchandise would become collector’s items. Austin gives Vince a letter to read, saying it’s going to tick the devil himself off. He pulls out a gun and Vince’s eyes are crossing. Again, WHERE IS SECURITY? Austin pulls the trigger and a paper comes out saying BANG 3:16. Vince wets himself and gets Stunned twice to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This is one of those shows that’s all about drama and storytelling and all that stuff. The wrestling here meant nothing but that was a very common occurrence back then. The Vince/Austin stuff is one of their more famous moments and would of course result in Austin being rehired very soon. I wouldn’t call this show good, but it was certainly entertaining which is the big idea at this point, especially when it was Warrior vs. Hogan over on Nitro at this point.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Smackdown
Date: January 13, 2000
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 13,253
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

This is another request that I don’t remember the reason behind. This is right around the Rumble so I’d bet on there being a lot of hype for the show. We’re in a good time for the company as 2000 is probably the best year the company has ever had, which is saying a lot as they had some solid years around this point. I have no idea what to expect here so let’s get to it.

The opening video is from Raw with Rock demanding that HHH and Stephanie reinstate Mick Foley before the entire roster walks out. Rock also demanded an eight man tag with DX vs. the Acolytes and Rock N Sock Connection. DX walked out on HHH for some reason and Foley got Pedigreed through the table and in the ring for the pin. Mankind came back and beat HHH up anyway.

Cue HHH and Stephanie to open the show. Stephanie says she wants to clear something up: no Superstars are leaving this company because the two of them have righted the wrongs. Why would anyone ever want to leave? Their doors are always open and they’re always fair. Stephanie says she’s the ONLY McMahon running things in this company.

HHH says that he needs to get something off his chest. He needs to apologize, but it’s not to the fans or to the guys that were going to walk out on Monday. HHH is their world champion and it’s for the fans. He will however apologize to DX. HHH talks about trying to show DX tough love and getting tough love in exchange when they walked out on him.

He wants to right the wrongs tonight, so it’s the Outlaws vs. Bradshaw in a No DQ handicap match. If Farrooq interferes, the Acolytes lose their title shot at the Rumble. The Outlaws get to have the same match with Farrooq too. As for X-Pac, tonight he’s teaming up with HHH to face Big Show and The Rock. As for Mick Foley, on Monday he was left in a puddle of blood. That’s just a taste of what’s coming at the Rumble in New York City. HHH has nothing to do right now, so get out here Foley.

Here’s Foley but it’s a fake. The fake one kneels before HHH and begs for mercy until the real Mankind comes out. He talks about how HHH has tried to take away his job and his dignity, but then on Monday he took away the best night of his career. HHH bloodied him and ruined his shirt. On Monday as the cool water of the shower hit him, he realized that Mankind may be entertaining and a good author, he’s not ready to face HHH in a street fight at the Royal Rumble.

However, the fans deserve a replacement, and that replacement is here tonight. Foley takes off the mask and rips open his shirt, revealing the Cactus Jack WANTED DEAD shirt. Cactus says that his first official act as a part of the WWF is kicking HHH’s teeth all over Chicago. He pounds HHH down in the corner (in what I believe Foley called the best punches he ever threw) and shrugs off a chair shot from the Fake Foley. HHH bails as the other one gets beaten up. Cactus says he’ll bleed at the Rumble but he’s going to beat HHH all over New York City and take the WWF Title from him. AWESOME segment here.

New Age Outlaws vs. Bradshaw

Road Dogg runs down the fans for not getting the catchphrase right. Bradshaw throws powder at the Outlaws who amazingly don’t snort it. Billy gets thrown into the steps and Billy is clotheslined to the floor. Bradshaw puts the steps in the ring and sets up a piledriver to Billy on said steps but Road Dogg saves with a chair shot. The double beating goes on until Bradshaw fights back in vain. Bradshaw kicks the chair into Roadie’s face but as he goes to slam Billy, Road Dogg chairs him in the head with Billy falling on top for the pin.

Here’s Rock in the back who welcomes this new guy named Jonathan Coachman to the WWF. Coach says he’s called Coach which Rock doesn’t like. Rock says it doesn’t matter if he’s teaming with Big Show or Big Bird, he’ll win. It doesn’t matter how Coach got the name Coach and that’s about it.

Too Cool/Rikishi vs. Hardcore Holly/Crash Holly/Al Snow

This was during Snow’s questionable heel turn phase. Hardcore and Grandmaster start us off and Holly is taken over by a hip toss. Off to Crash who gets the same treatment. Scotty comes in and things speed up. A kind of pumphandle slam puts Crash down and it’s Worm time. Snow pulls Scotty to the floor and Hardcore takes over on him. The former racecar dude jumps into a boot and it’s hot tag Rikishi. A one man 3D kills Crash but Hardcore dropkicks him down. Snow gets crotched on the post as the Rikishi Driver ends Crash.

Rating: D+. Not much here but the fans popped big for Rikishi and his dancing pals. For the life of me I don’t get the point of making him a heel. I mean…..why would anyone do that? The match was nothing of note but it filled in about five minutes which is the right idea I guess. Nothing much to see here though.

Snow beats up the Hollies with Head. Too Cool and Rikishi dance.

HHH congratulates the Outlaws but they don’t know where X-Pac is.

Clip of Cactus Jack in Japan being all psycho. Good thing they had this ready just in case he transformed isn’t it?

Test vs. Gangrel

Test has a broken nose or something like that coming in here. He starts off fast but walks into a belly to belly. Test gets sent to the floor where Luna attacks. Back in and Gangrel gets crushed by the gutwrench powerbomb but Luna distracts referee Teddy Long. There’s the full nelson slam but Luna pulls the referee to the floor and decks him. She jumps on Test and gets spanked for her efforts. The match is thrown out and that’s probably a good thing.

Test beats up both of them post match.

Jericho and Chyna are in the back and try to make up after losing in a tag match on Monday.

Hardy Boys vs. Big Bossman/Prince Albert

This is before Lita joined the team so it’s Terri with them here. Albert is currently known as Tensai. He and Jeff get us going with Jeff having to evade a lot. Off to Matt for some successful double teaming on the current Japanese enthusiast. Albert gets Matt up for a spinning rack neckbreaker and it’s off to Bossman. He beats Matt down even more and kidnaps Terri which goes nowhere. Everything breaks down and Jeff avoids a charging Albert, sending him into Bossman. Albert and Bossman had been arguing a lot lately so while they fight some more, Jeff dropkicks Bossman into Alberto and rolls him up for the pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here really but it was all about splitting up Albert and Bossman for good, which needed to be done. Bossman would do nothing of note while Albert would join T&A which gave us some very hot shots of Trish Stratus. The match was nothing of note though and was just there as a means to an end.

Big Show wants to face HHH but says he doesn’t like being called a jabroni by Rock. Maybe he’ll win the Rumble instead of Rock.

Chyna goes up to Tori (not Wilson) and has bad news for her. I guess we’ll get more on that later.

Kurt Angle/Steve Blackman vs. Edge/Christian

Angle is VERY new here, having about three months under his belt at this point. Edge and Blackman get us going with Edge dominating through a lot of dropkicks. Off to Christian vs. Angle with the Olympian getting run over. Christian misses a charge and runs into the post to give the cannon fodder control. It’s so weird to see Angle as a rookie like this and the lowest level guy as far as accomplishments go. Angle hooks a quick chinlock but the Angle Slam is countered into a DDT by Christian. Blackman fires off some kicks to Edge….and here’s Val Venis. He plays with Blackman’s kendo stick so Edge can hit a German for the pin.

Rating: D. I have no idea what the point of this was as I don’t remember Blackman vs. Val at all and I have no idea why this would have been a feud at all. Angle would become the first big star out of this with Edge close behind him and again it’s weird to see something like this with both of them being lower midcard guys. The match was nothing.

Chyna is talking to Tori in the back still and says that Jericho is crossing a line. He’s been looking at Tori apparently and maybe Kane, Tori’s boyfriend, should kill Jericho as long as it’s not for the co-owned IC Title that Jericho and Chyna share. Tori freaks out and agrees.

Clip of Cactus diving into a dumpster and getting shoved off the stage.

New Age Outlaws vs. Farrooq

Farrooq jumps them both to start but the numbers catch up with him quickly. Billy hits a Jackhammer and the shaky knee gets the pin with Billy helping out. This wasn’t even 90 seconds.

Bradshaw runs out with a pipe for the save.

DX is still looking for X-Pac.

D’Lo Brown/Godfather vs. Headbangers

What is with all the tag matches tonight? An orange logo pops up on screen with a 13 in the middle and says the mood is about to change. That would wind up being Taz. Godfather asks if the Headbangers are gay but Mosh says Godfather’s problem is that they look better than his ladies. Mosh and Brown get us going but both quickly tag. Godfather runs Thrasher over and hits the spinning legdrop. Brown comes back in for a double suplex The Bangers double team D’Lo but since they don’t recognize, it’s quickly back to Godfather for the Ho Train. Low Down gets the quick pin. This was basically a squash.

Big Show and Rock are in the back and Big Show doesn’t want Rock in his way tonight. Rock says Big Show is a worthy opponent but he’ll never be People’s Champion. HHH can have the back of his hand while X-Pac has the front during the beatdown tonight. Rock is just CRAZY over here.

More Classic Cactus shows him winning a random hardcore match over Mideon and Viscera.

Chris Jericho vs. Kane

Pre-match Jericho runs his mouth of course, saying that he doesn’t find Tori attractive and you’d have to be stupid to do so. The beating begins as Chyna is watching in the back with a big smile on her face. Kane grabs him to start but Jericho comes back with the forearm….which does nothing at all. A powerbomb puts the Canadian down and a shoulder sends Jericho to the floor.

Kane mixes it up and tries a clothesline off the steps but Jericho ducks. They go to the apron with Jericho dropkicking Kane to the floor. Jericho finally gets a breather by hitting a drop toehold onto the steps. Back in the missile dropkick looks to set up the Walls but the Kat (Chyna’s implied lesbian worship slave) comes out to steal the IC belt. The distraction lets the chokeslam and tombstone get the pin.

Rating: C-. Nothing here but these two had some chemistry together at times. The co-champions angle didn’t really work but it was certainly a unique idea. Kane would move on to feud with X-Pac over Tori while Jericho would have crazy good matches with Angle and Benoit for like ever.

X-Pac is here, making the whole “where is he” stuff from earlier mean nothing. Pac isn’t worried about tonight but doesn’t like having to get beaten up every week. HHH says trust him.

X-Pac/HHH vs. Big Show/The Rock

HHH tries to drive a wedge between his opponents by saying Rock has to come out last to get the big pop because of his ego. Big Show looks mad before starting with HHH. Show pounds him down and hits a headbutt before stomping away in the corner. He refuses to tag Rock so when he calls for the chokeslam, Rock tags himself in. Off to Pac and Rock destroys him, throwing him to the outside. Spinebuster to HHH looks to set up the Elbow but Pac hits him in the back with a chair.

Pac comes in but the Bronco Buster is killed by a clothesline. Rock takes a spinwheel kick for two and it’s back to HHH. DX tags off a few times until HHH walks into a DDT. Rock crawls over to Big Show but the big man walks out on him, officially turning heel. A low blow and Pedigree get the pin on Rock.

Rating: D+. Nothing much to see here as this was much more about the angle than the match. Rock vs. HHH would obviously be a bigger deal later on in the year and would go on to produce one of the best feuds of all time. Big Show would turn face again just after Wrestlemania. That guy must hold a record for most turns.

Post match Big Show chokeslams Rock to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This wasn’t the worst show ever but it had an excellent opener to start things off. The Rumble would wind up being awesome and almost everything here touched on matches there other than Hardys vs. Dudleys but I can live with that. The opening segment is legendary and it is for a reason, as it worked perfectly. Not a good show for the most part but it had its moments.

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