Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXXIX Night Two (2024 Edition): Story Time

Wrestlemania XXXIX Night Two
Date: April 2, 2023
Location: SoFi Stadium, Inglewood, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves
Attendance: 67,553
America The Beautiful: Jimmie Allen

After a rather long intermission, we’re ready to wrap up the show and this night has a lot to live up to. The first night was outstanding and now we have the real main event, as Roman Reigns defends the WWE Universal Title against Cody Rhodes. In addition, Gunther defends the Intercontinental Title against Sheamus and Drew McIntyre and we have a Cell match as a bonus. Let’s get to it.

Jimmie Allen sings America The Beautiful.

Kevin Hart gives us the cold open again, this time talking about how the sequel has to be bigger and better. Points for not just redoing the same video from the night before and keeping up with the theme.

Miz and Snoop Dogg welcome us to the show with a quick recap and preview. Snoop is ready to get us going.

Brock Lesnar vs. Omos

The story here is that Lesnar can’t overpower Omos (with MVP). Seriously that’s about it. Lesnar can’t double leg him to start and gets tossed around. Running shoulders don’t do much for Lesnar so Omos hits a headbutt and grabs a slam. Omos throws him around again and hits some forearms to the back. We hit the bearhug, followed by another slam, and another bearhug to keep Lesnar in trouble. Lesnar fights out and is quickly chokeslammed for a near fall. Back up and Lesnar rolls some German suplexes but his back gives out on the F5 attempt. Then Lesnar hits the F5 for the pin at 4:56.

Rating: C-. Well they definitely did the right thing in keeping this short, as the whole thing was about Lesnar doing his power moves but not doing them all that well because Omos is that big. It’s a very basic story and while Omos got in some impressive stuff, it felt more like a way to get Lesnar on the show more than anything else (which granted that’s more or less what it was). Not a great match but the fans liked the big throws so points for that.

Liv Morgan/Raquel Rodriguez vs. Natalya/Shotzi vs. Chelsea Green/Sonya Deville vs. Ronda Rousey/Shayna Baszler

It’s the women’s match of the showcase tag match from last night. Baszler and Rousey (the bullies) didn’t have to qualify here and were just thrown into the match. Morgan Backstabbers Sonya to start and a one kneed Codebreaker makes it even worse. Natalya comes in for the sling shot belly to back drop. The basement dropkick puts Morgan down again but she hurricanranas her way to freedom.

Rodriguez comes in and gets to throw Natalya around, leaving Natalya to hand it off to Green. A missile dropkick has no effect so Sonya comes back in, allowing Green to grab some hair. Shotzi comes in so Baszler throws her outside, where Rousey is waiting on her. That leaves Baszler to get caught in a triplebomb, meaning Rousey has to get on the apron…but the three on one is broken up by Green and Sonya.

Shotzi dives onto people in the ring and on the floor, but Green stops to tell us to get our cameras ready. Rather than face Rodriguez, Green dives onto a bunch of people at ringside. With no one else left inside, Rodriguez powerbombs Morgan onto the pile for the big crash. Back in and Rodriguez fall away slams Shotzi, setting up the corkscrew Vader Bomb. Sonya comes in for the save though and some double teaming puts Rodriguez on the floor.

Green and Sonya celebrate until Natalya and Shotzi are back in for an assisted double Sliced Bread. A Hart Attack gets two on Sonya with Green making the save. There’s the double Sharpshooter to Sonya and Green until Morgan dives off the top for the save. Morgan takes Shotzi down but Rousey and Baszler (now with one boot and limping) come back in to break it up. Rousey armbars Shotzi for the win at 8:22.

Rating: C+. I don’t know if Baszler’s injury put she and Rousey on the floor for so long but they were almost not around whatsoever for a good chunk of the match. The match was pretty similar to its male counterpart but two of these teams felt thrown together and it hurt a lot. Rousey and Baszler winning should set them up as the monsters of the division and they would win the Tag Team Titles in about a month and a half…after Rodriguez and Morgan won them first. As usual, those things are a mess.

We look at Bobby Lashley winning the Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal on Smackdown.

Lashley comes out and shows off the trophy.

Xavier Woods and UpUpDownDown preview the Intercontinental Title match.

We recap Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Gunther for the latter’s Intercontinental Title. Gunther is a monster champion and his fellow Europeans want to hit him really hard and win the title. Sheamus and McIntyre are friends but both want the title, meaning they’re willing to fight each other. This falls into the “do we need to draw you a picture here” category. It also falls into the “we saw this video (or something really similar to it) last night” category.

Intercontinental Title: Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Gunther

Gunther is defending and Titus O’Neil is on commentary. Sheamus and McIntyre waste no time in knocking the champ to the floor before starting to lay into each other. Sheamus hits a clothesline and takes McIntyre into the corner for some uppercuts. McIntyre is sent to the apron for the forearms but Gunther is back up with chops for both of them. Gunther sends McIntyre into the post for a crash out to the floor, followed by a big boot to Sheamus’ face.

The Boston crab has Sheamus in more trouble until McIntyre comes in to break it up. McIntyre and Gunther chop it out (and they’re loud chops too) but Sheamus is back in with the uppercuts all around. With Gunther getting back up, Sheamus ties him in the ropes for the forearms to the chest, mixed in with chops from McIntyre. That leaves Gunther down so Sheamus ties McIntyre up in the ropes for almost thirty forearms to the chest.

Gunther is back in to break up the Celtic Cross though and a German suplex drops Sheamus again. The big clothesline gives Gunther two but McIntyre is back up to suplex Sheamus into Sheamus in the corner. There’s a Futureshock to Gunther but the Claymore misses. Gunther powerbombs McIntyre down and goes up but Sheamus is right there with a super White Noise. The Celtic Cross sets up the Cloverleaf so Gunther makes the rope, which means nothing because it’s No DQ.

Sheamus lets go and puts the hold back on anyway, only to have McIntyre come in for the break. That doesn’t go well either as Sheamus knees both of them down but McIntyre cuts off the Brogue Kick. McIntyre headbutts him out to the floor and busts out the big flip dive, leaving everyone down on the floor. Cole to O’Neil: “You never did that!” O’Neil: “AND I NEVER WILL!”

Back in and Sheamus Brogue Kicks McIntyre for two, followed by the Claymore to give McIntyre two of his own. Sheamus drops McIntyre again and covers but Gunther dives in with a top rope splash. Gunther’s powerbomb to Sheamus onto McIntyre leaves them both down, followed by another powerbomb to pin McIntyre and retain at 16:35.

Rating: A. It’s rare that I’ll watch a match back on its own but I’ve seen this one more than a few times now as it’s that kind of brutal. These guys beat the fire out of each other and that is exactly how it was advertised. They didn’t stop and for once it felt like three people having a match. There were stretches where it was two in and one out, but it was a brutal and hard hitting enough match to make up for it. Excellent stuff here, as you probably should have expected.

WWE did charity work this week.

We recap Asuka vs. Bianca Belair for the latter’s Raw Women’s Title. Belair won the title last year at Wrestlemania and has become a huge star during her reign. Then Asuka showed up as an evil clown and Belair is all scared, at least somewhat due to Asuka spraying her with the mist over and over. It’s a simple story but it didn’t exactly work and this never felt like a big feud.

Raw Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Asuka

Asuka is challenging and comes out with a team of masked Asukas, while Belair counters with an all girl kids dance troupe. Eh point to the champ. Belair kicks her down at the bell and hits a dropkick into the corner, setting up the right hands. That’s broken up and Asuka kicks her down, setting up the big missed kick to the head. Asuka puts her on top but Belair flips over her and hits a spinebuster for a fast two.

Something close to a triangle choke has Belair in trouble before Asuka switches to the Asuka Lock. It’s not on quite full though and Belair rolls outside, where she PLANTS Asuka with a sitout powerbomb. Back in and Belair misses a charge into the post, allowing Asuka to pull her into a heel hook. Belair powers out but Asuka grabs an ankle lock, which is rolled away for the break. Asuka is right back up with a missile dropkick for two and things slow down a bit.

They go to the apron where Asuka hits a hard dropkick into the post. Belair sends her into the post to even things up a bit, setting up a deadlift superplex to bring them back inside. Asuka’s kick to the face gets two but a Codebreaker is blocked. A running Blockbuster into a handspring moonsault gives Belair two and frustration is setting in. They go to the corner with Asuka slipping out of a fireman’s carry and hitting a Codebreaker for two of her own. Back up and the mist misses but Asuka slips out of the KOD. The cross armbreaker doesn’t quite work for Asuka though and Belair powers up for the

Rating: B-. This was good but it never hit that next level, save for maybe the final sequence. The story just wasn’t that compelling coming in and it didn’t really feel like a major showdown. Belair retaining the title over a top level challenge is good though as beating Asuka is still an impressive feat.

We look at Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens beating the Usos for the Tag Team Titles in Night One’s main event.

Here are Miz and Snoop Dogg to announce tonight’s attendance of 81,395, giving us a two day total of 161,892. That’s great, but Miz isn’t happy with Snoop for putting him into an impromptu match last night. Dogg: “So you want to do it again?” Of course not, because Miz doesn’t like being humiliated in his town. Snoop says this is the people’s city and introduces….Shane McMahon, because SHANE MUST BE A THING. Shane thanks the fans and sounds like he can barely breathe after his entrance. Time for a match

Shane McMahon vs. Miz

Shane punches him in the corner and yeah they’re as bad as before. Then he drops down, leapfrogs over Miz and….tears his quad on the landing less than thirty seconds in. That brings Snoop in to hit Miz in the face and apparently we have a replacement. Snoop knocks him down again and drops a People’s Elbow for the pin at 2:11. This seems to have been completely impromptu with either the referee telling Snoop to get in there or Snoop coming up with the idea on his own. Either way, major points to Snoop who had no idea what he was doing and gave the fans a very fun moment out of nowhere.

We recap Edge vs. the Demon Finn Balor inside the Cell. Balor threw Edge out of the Judgment Day the night he joined, setting off a feud between the two of them. This led to Judgment Day attacking both Edge and his wife Beth Phoenix, meaning it’s time for the big, violent fight.

The Cell is lowered and we get a voiceover (from Russell Crowe of all people, as part of a movie tie-in) talking about how evil it is as well.

Edge vs. Finn Balor

Inside the Cell and this is Brood Edge (and yes, his Titantron literally says BROOD EDGE), who comes out of the Brood ring of fire with a shiny mask that makes him look like the Terminator while wearing wings, against the Demon. They waste no time in getting the weapons, with Edge grabbing a red chair and Balor grabbing a purple kendo stick (because not only do you need weapons in the Cell, but you need COLOR COORDINATED weapons).

Balor gets the better of things and knocks him to the floor, only to get hammered back inside. Edge knocks him off the apron and grabs a bunch of kendo sticks (two purple, one red), some of which he uses to pin Balor into the corner of the Cell. A dropkick off the apron hits Balor to make it worse, meaning it’s time to set up the table. Balor uses the delay to get out and sends Edge hard into the steps. They get back inside where Edge hits a quick Impaler but the spear is countered with a Sling Blade.

They go outside with Balor being dropkicked through a table, only to come back in with an Unprettier. The Edge-O-Matic gets two more and it’s time to grab a ladder. Edge throws said ladder at Balor’s face and Balor is busted open BAD, meaning we pause for the medic to come inside to check on him (this led to a hilarious reaction from Mick Foley, because apparently YOU CAN PAUSE A CELL MATCH DUE TO AN INJURY).

Edge uses the delay to get a bunch of weapons ready but Balor is back up with 1916. The spear only hits ladder and Balor hits another Slind Blade. Coup de Grace connects for two and Balor climbs the ladder, only to get countered into a super Edgecution for a slightly delayed two.

That takes too long again and Balor is back up with his own weapons shots, including a bunch of chair shots to Edge. Balor climbs up but instead climbs the cage and gets onto the camera platform. This adds a full nine inched above the top rope but the Coup De Grace only hits table. Edge’s spear gets two so he unloads with chair shots to the back. The Conchairto finishes Balor at 18:10.

Rating: B-. This was the modern Cell match and that is not a good thing for the most part. The bell rang and they went straight for the weapons, which didn’t exactly make the Cell itself feel important. It was a violent and hard hitting match but other than one or two spots, I’m not sure how much the Cell was needed. Either use the Cell or don’t, because this was a street fight with the cage blocking the camera view.

We look at the Wrestlemania trailers.

Backlash is coming to Puerto Rico. You should too!

We look at the Hall Of Fame induction ceremony.

Here is the class in the stadium:

Stacy Keibler (who has not aged a day)
Andy Kaufman (represented by his family)
Great Muta (that’s a nice addition)
Tim White (Warrior Award, and his brother looks identical to him)
Rey Mysterio (that’s about as perfect of a choice for an active headliner as you could pick)

Mysterio shakes the other inductees’ hands (bowing to Muta).

We look at Set Rollins’ entrance from last night. Feel free to get on with the show at any time.

We recap Roman Reigns defending the WWE Universal Title against Cody Rhodes. The big idea here is Rhodes wants to finish his story, meaning winning the title in his dad’s honor while also completing his long rise to the top of WWE. Reigns has been champion for two and a half years and isn’t going away that fast, so it’s time for the big showdown. It feels like a main event and Cody is almost the last man standing to fight Reigns.

Smackdown World Title: Cody Rhodes vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is defending and has Paul Heyman/Solo Sikoa with him. Rhodes gets his big entrance and goes over to say hi to his family, including giving his weightlifting belt to an unmasked Negative One (the son of the late Brody Lee, who makes occasional AEW appearances). Reigns gets a special entrance of his own, with a team of pianists playing the start of his entrance live. We get an ACKNOWLEDGE ME from Reigns before the bell finally rings.

Rhodes hammerlocks him over to the ropes to start and Reigns isn’t impressed. A headlock takeover and a right hand has Reigns a bit more annoyed so he bails out to the floor. Heyman’s advice is that Reigns isn’t here for Rhodes because Rhodes is here for him. Heyman: “NOW SMASH HIM!” Back in and Reigns elbows him in the face, meaning it’s time to raise up a finger. Rhodes manages a dropkick (Reigns is stunned again) for two, with commentary saying that cover wasn’t about getting a pin but rather sending a message to Reigns. What that message is isn’t clear but I’d guess “Eat At Joe’s”.

The Disaster Kick is pulled out of the air though and Reigns hits a powerbomb for two. Some suplexes have Rhodes in more trouble but he’s back up to send Reigns out to the floor. That goes badly for him as well as Reigns drops him face first onto the apron. A hard slam puts Rhodes down onto the ramp but Rhodes gets in one of his own. Rhodes sends him back inside but Sikoa gets in a chair shot to the ribs, allowing Reigns to come back with the apron boot.

The cravate slows Rhodes down back inside until he fights up, only to have Sikoa interfere again. This time it lets Reigns hit a hard clothesline before whipping Rhodes into the corner to stay on his bad ribs. They go back outside with Reigns loading up the announcers’ table but getting backdropped through the other one for the big hope spot. Back in and Rhodes hits the drop down uppercut into the snap powerslam.

There’s the Cody Cutter for a big near fall so Reigns rolls outside, meaning it’s a suicide dive to hit him again. They try to get back in but Sikoa gets in a weightlifting belt shot….which the referee hears for an ejection. The distraction lets Rhodes hit Cross Rhodes for two (with Heyman looking on in fear for a nice visual). Reigns is back with some shots to the head and a release Rock Bottom gets two.

The Superman Punch is countered into a Pedigree (Heyman even reaches through the ropes this time) for two and it’s time to start the comeback. Said comeback is cut off with a Superman Punch to knock Rhodes out of the air for two more. The spear is countered into a sunset flip for two and Rhodes whips out a Figure Four for a change of pace. Reigns turns it over (while slapping the mat on the way there), with Rhodes getting over to the ropes for the break.

A big spear connects for two and now Reigns is stunned for a change. With nothing else working, Reigns hits him in the face over and over before grabbing the guillotine choke. Rhodes can’t spinebuster his way to freedom but he can slip his head out and hammer away at Reigns for a change. The referee gets bumped though and a double knockdown gives us quite the breather. Cody is back up for the Cross Rhodes but the Usos run in to break it up. The 1D drops Rhodes but here are Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn to take out the Usos.

A Stunner into the Helluva Kick leave Reigns down and the other four brawl out into the crowd. Rhodes gets the big dramatic near fall (and thank goodness that wasn’t the pin as Rhodes winning thanks to Owens and Zayn wouldn’t have worked) and they’re both down again. Back up and the slug it out with both of them being staggered off the shots. The Superman Punch is countered with the Flip Flop And Fly into the Bionic Elbow. Rhodes hits back to back Cross Rhodes….but Sikoa comes in with the Samoan Spike. The spear retains the title at 34:36.

Rating: B+. A year removed from this and my goodness I’m still amazed at the guts it took to not pull the trigger here. This was Cody’s chance to win the whole thing and they kept it on Reigns, which is quite the way to go. They beat the fire out of each other and it had the big match feel, but not pulling the trigger here still feels way off. Heck of a main event, but man they had the fans ready for the moment and just didn’t do it.

Replays and a highlight package wrap us up.

Overall Rating: B. There were some weak parts here and there but the good stuff is more than enough to carry this. Much like Night One, you can’t fault the atmosphere and the look/feel of the show, which made for a heck of a showcase for everyone involved. The main event was very good (ending aside perhaps) and the Intercontinental Title match was great, mixed in with some other strong stuff along the way. I liked this one a lot and the slightly shorter running time helped, but it’s just a few ticks below Night One’s instant classic status.

Overall Overall Rating: A-. Wrestlemania has a complicated history but this was going along with the big, epic show feel and it worked to near perfection. It’s one of the best Wrestlemanias ever and what matters is the show feeling as big as possible. Granted it helped that there was some great action, though that ending is one of those things that is going to stick in a lot of fans’ memories for a very long time. I loved the show overall, and my goodness WWE knows how to make these things work so well.

Ratings Comparison

Brock Lesnar vs. Omos

Original: C+
Redo: C-

Women’s Tag Team Showcase

Original: C
Redo: C+

Drew McIntyre vs. Sheamus vs. Gunther

Original: A-
Redo: A

Asuka vs. Bianca Belair

Original: B
Redo: B-

Shane McMahon vs. Miz

Original: N/A
Redo: N/A

Edge vs. Finn Balor

Original: B
Redo: B-

Roman Reigns vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: B+
Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B+
Redo: B

Overall Overall Rating:

Original: A
Redo: A-

At least most of them are in in the ballpark. Either way, excellent show.

 

 

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – XXXVIII Night Two (2023 Redo): They Had To Make A Sequel

Wrestlemania XXXVIII Night Two
Date: April 3, 2022
Location: AT&T Stadium, Arlington, Texas
Attendance: 78,453
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith
America The Beautiful: Jesse James Decker

It’s the second half of the show and WWE has a lot to live up to after the first night. This half is built around the unification match for the WWE and Universal Titles as Brock Lesnar faces Roman Reigns in the BIGGEST WRESTLEMANIA MATCH EVER (THIS YEAR!). Other than that, Pat McAfee is facing Austin Theory in a match that has gotten a lot of TV time. Let’s get to it.

I was in the stadium for this show, sitting in the third deck with the stage on my right.

Jesse James Decker performs America The Beautiful.

Video on Night One.

Mark Walhberg talks about how the sequel is almost never quite as good as the original, but it might be tonight. This is going to be all about the emotions and it’s not edge of your seat, but out of your seat. Points for doing a separate video instead of the same one again.

Here is HHH to get things going. He gets his full entrance and poses on every corner…before being handed a pair of boots. With the boots in the ring, he thanks the fans and welcomes us to Wrestlemania as pyro goes off. HHH goes over to hug his family (including Stephanie McMahon, his children and others) and leaves to the side of the ramp. This would be his retirement due to his heart issues and you can probably imagine he was going to have at least one more big match.

Gable Steveson is here again.

Raw Tag Team Titles: RKBro vs. Alpha Academy vs. Street Profits

RKBro is defending and these teams have been fighting over the titles for weeks, with only the Profits not winning them at some point. Otis cleans house to start before all six get in for the big brawl. With the ring clearing out, Ford hits the big running flip dive to the floor, followed by Gable moonsaulting onto almost everyone. Back in and Otis splashes Riddle but slaps him around instead of covering.

Gable comes in to work on Riddle’s leg but Riddle fights up. Ford is back in and gets over to Dawkins for the tag so house can be cleaned. Otis splashes Dawkins and Riddle but misses a charge into the corner. Riddle Bro To Sleeps Dawkins and Orton comes in to clean house. The Academy is dropped onto the announcers’ table but Otis is back up to take out everyone else. Gable is back up with a Steiner Bulldog for two on Ford but Dawkins breaks up a Vader Bomb.

The Profits hit a Doomsday Blockbuster on Gable before knocking Riddle outside. Dawkins blocks the RKO and hits a spinebuster on Orton before flip diving onto Otis. Ford loads up a frog splash….but Riddle springboards to the top to RKO him back down in an awesome spot. Not to be outdone, Gable goes up but Orton pulls him out of the air into the RKO to retain at 11:32.

Rating: B-. This was the usual wild triple threat match that would have felt fine on a big time house show. Watching Riddle and Orton hit one RKO after another is always fun as they really did have it down to a science. While it was entertaining, I couldn’t have told you this opened the show to save my life as it had absolutely no staying power.

Post match the Profits and RKO are ready to share a drink. Hold on though as they want Gable Steveson to join them. Steveson gets in, but Gable knocks the cup out of his hand. Orton and Riddle look stunned (Orton’s face is hilarious) as Steveson takes his shirt off. Gable demands respect as the ring clears out. Gable even has some advice for Steveson: SHHHHHHHHHHUSH! That earns him an overhead belly to belly and now the toasting can ensue.

Bobby Lashley vs. Omos

No MVP here despite him being Lashley’s manager. Omos powers him down to start and then drives Lashley face first into a knee. Lashley tries to power out of a head vice but gets clotheslined down instead. Omos hits a charge in the corner (or close to it, as he somehow missed a running splash) but Lashley starts hammering away. The Hurt Lock is blocked though and Omos clotheslines him down.

Lashley manages to catch him on the ropes and goes up, only to be pulled out of the air for a fireman’s carry slam. Back up and Lashley charges into a bearhug, which is driven hard into the corner. The bearhug goes on again but Lashley fights out again and slugs away. Somehow Lashley manages a suplex (egads) and a spear to the back sets up the regular version to finish Omos at 6:36.

Rating: C-. This was the spectacle match of the show and it was only so good. There are only so many things that Omos can do in the ring and Lashley made it work as well as it could. Not a good match but they did keep it short and it didn’t get too insane. The suplex worked as a big spot too so it could have been worse, as weak as it was.

We recap Johnny Knoxville vs. Sami Zayn. Knoxville was in the Royal Rumble to do publicity for his new Jackass movie and Zayn freaked out, sending him into an obsessive feud to destroy Knoxville once and for all. Then Knoxville fought back by having Zayn’s phone number flown on a banner above Los Angeles, resulting in Zayn receiving 60,000+ texts. The solution: an anything goes match.

Sami Zayn vs. Johnny Knoxville

Anything goes and Zayn kicks him in the face at the bell to start fast. They head outside with Zayn sending him into the barricade right in front of the Jackass crew. The crew goes after him, allowing Knoxville to come up with a fire extinguisher blast for a breather. Back in and Zayn busts out the cookie sheet to take over before switching over to a crutch. With that broken over Knoxville’s back, it’s time to bring in a table (of course).

Zayn goes for another table….and gets his hand caught in a mouse trap. It seems that there is a table covered in them (because reasons of Knoxville) and the delay lets Knoxville bang some trashcan lids around Zayn’s head. Knoxville sets up the table in the corner but gets suplexed through it instead. The helluva Kick is loaded up but Knoxville whips out an airhorn to cut it off.

Cue part of the Jackass crew, with a guy described as a party boy dancing and stripping (Cole: “It’s Naked Mideon 2.0!”). Zayn takes him out and Knoxville uses the distraction to grab a rollup for two. With the party boy kicked underneath the ring, Wee Man (he’s short) pops out and beats Zayn up, including a slam back inside (the place goes NUTS for that). Knoxville’s tornado DDT gets two as commentary is losing it over this whole thing.

Wee Man pulls out a machine with a boot attached and designed to kick someone low. Instead Zayn kicks him in the face and sends him outside before going up top. That’s fine with Knoxville, who whips out a remote control to spray pyro from the corner Zayn is standing on. With Zayn down in the corner, there’s a bowling ball between the legs and then the boot machine kicks him low again.

Knoxville whips out a tazer (sure) so Zayn runs….right into a giant hand that slaps him in the face. Back in and Zayn grabs a suplex before going up again. This time, Knoxville tongs him low and sends Zayn flying through the mousetrap table. Now the Jackass crew pulls out a giant mousetrap (just go with it) and Knoxville tazes Zayn onto it, with the trap springing for the pin (ignore Zayn’s shoulders being on the trap and not the mat) at 14:33.

Rating: B-. This is the definition of “it wasn’t for me”, but the stadium was going NUTS for the whole thing and they embraced everything insane about the whole thing. It was a total stunt show instead of a match (which is what it needed to be) and Zayn got wrecked by one stunt after another. I never need to see it again, but for a one off, it was goofy fun. Less than three weeks later, Zayn would need something to make him feel better after all this, so he started talking to the Bloodline. Not bad for a next step.

Here’s part of Drew McIntyre beating Happy Corbin last night and then cutting the ring ropes.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Sasha Banks/Naomi vs. Carmella/Queen Zelina vs. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley vs. Natalya/Shayna Baszler

One fall and Carmella/Vega are defending. Banks and Naomi ride out in a rather expensive looking car while Liv and Rhea have something of a Catwoman/Donnie Darko theme. Ripley starts and no one wants to fight her until Banks comes in for the staredown. Banks gets powered down but comes back up with an armbar that doesn’t last long. Riptide is blocked and Banks realizes she needs to think twice here.

Naomi comes in but everything breaks down with most of the, going outside. Banks and Morgan both hit dives before going back inside for a staredown. Back to back Codebreakers rock Morgan and Oblivion makes it worse, only to have Natalya take Morgan down. Baszler comes in and stomps on Morgan’s leg as things slow back down. The leg cranking ensues before Carmella comes in to send Morgan into the corner.

Everything breaks down again with Carmella hurricanranaing Ripley off the top. Naomi and Banks hit double Eat Defeat on Morgan and go up, only to have it broken up. That means stereo Towers of Doom, with Morgan and Ripley handling the powerbombs. Everyone is down for a bit until Riptide into a backstabber gives Ripley two on Naomi.

Morgan breaks up Baszler’s cover on Naomi and gets faceplanted for her efforts. A Hart Attack is broken up and Carmella takes Naomi down for some near falls. Banks is back in with a frog splash to Carmella but Vega breaks up the Crossface. The Meteora from the apron hits Vega and Naomi kicks Carmella in the head. A wheelbarrow slam/Codebreaker combination hits Carmella to give Banks the pin and the titles at 10:50.

Rating: C. It wasn’t exactly great and as usual, there were so many people here that it might as well have been a free for all. The wrestling was only so good and the titles feeling so completely unimportant doesn’t help. These feel like thrown together teams fighting over the titles and that doesn’t quite make it feel Wrestlemania worthy. If these titles are supposed to mean something, stop having makeshift teams fighting over them. At least you now have a steady pair of hands in Naomi and Banks to hold them, as they should be fine for a long time to come.

We look back at Miz and Logan Paul beating the Mysterios and then breaking up because Paul wanted to leave as a good guy.

We recap Edge vs. AJ Styles. Edge wanted a special opponent so Styles accepted, only for Edge to go full villain and Conchairto him. Now Styles is back and wanting revenge.

AJ Styles vs. Edge

Styles is bleeding from the side of his face, apparently having hit himself on the set on the way in. Since it’s Wrestlemania, Edge rises up onto a throne surrounded by fire. They stare at each other to start until Styles starts knocking him away. The dropkick looks to set up the Calf Crusher but Edge is straight over to the ropes. Back up and Edge is sent outside, with Styles ramming him head first into the steps to make things more violent.

The springboard 450 hits raised knees back inside, with Edge holding his knee in something that rarely happens off of that counter. Edge’s knee is fine enough for the posing before he kicks away at Styles. The abdominal stretch goes on but Styles goes after the knee to break it up. A shoulder breaker cuts Styles down again though and they’re down long enough that we can look at some of the giant graphics for the match around the stadium.

Back up and Styles misses a hard charge into the corner and they’re both down again. Edge hits a Codebreaker onto the bad arm and it’s time to crank on both arms at once. Styles can’t Pele his way out of trouble as Edge pulls him into an STF, which he switches into a Crossface (sounds like a Samoa Joe fan). That’s broken up with a quick rope break and we slow down again.

Edge misses a spear and Styles grabs a slingshot DDT for the double knockdown (again). Styles goes up top but gets caught by Edge. That doesn’t work either, as Styles slips out and kicks the bad knee, setting up a torture rack spun into a powerbomb for two more. Edge is back up but charges into a German suplex to put them both down again. They slug it out until Styles manages a Pele Kick but the Calf Crusher is blocked again.

The Crossface has Styles in big trouble until he rolls his way to freedom. The Edge-O-Matic gives Edge two and a slingshot powerbomb gets the same. They both take their time getting up and head to the corner, where Styles superplexes him down onto the apron (ouch). Back in and the springboard 450 hits Edge’s back for two. The Phenomenal Forearm and spear both miss so Styles hits the Styles Clash for a rather near fall. Styles loads up the Phenomenal Forearm….but Damien Priest (US Champion at the time) is here to offer him a distraction. The delay lets Edge spear Styles out of the air for the pin at 24:26.

Rating: B. This was a good, hard hitting match that felt like it belonged on the big stage, but the double downs got a bit repetitive as they probably burned off five minutes of just laying on the mat. The distraction finish was a bit annoying as well as it just cut everything else off, but it certainly seemed to set up something for the future. Either way, best match of the night so far.

Tonight’s attendance: 78,354.

Byron Saxton replaces Pat McAfee, who has to get ready for his match with Austin Theory.

Brawling Brutes vs. New Day

Butch is here with the Brutes. New Day has Big E. inspired gear, even down to the singlets, for a nice touch. Butch loses his mind on the floor before the bell and the brawl is on inside. The bell rings and Kofi hits Trouble In Paradise on Holland. Sheamus pulls Kofi outside though, leaving Woods to make a save. Back in and Kofi seems to leave a top rope shot to the face a bit short as Woods takes the straps down.

A running Downward Spiral hits Holland but Sheamus Brogue Kicks Kofi on the floor. Back in and Woods superkicks Holland (he’s taking a beating here)…but Sheamus Brogue Kicks Woods silly. Northern Grit finishes Woods at 1:42. So Big E.’s career might have been ended and his team loses in less than two minutes at Wrestlemania. This place isn’t nice to New Day (as they lost to the League Of Nations here in 2016 as well).

We look back at Cody Rhodes returning and facing Seth Rollins. These recaps might as well have a big sign saying FILLER. Or PEACOCK COMMERCIALS.

The Hall of Fame class is honored again, with only Undertaker coming out in person. Undertaker comes out, waves, and that’s it. I’m not sure why this needed to happen two nights in a row and the way it happened again made me think it was going to be an angle but…yeah nothing, even after it goes on for a good while.

We recap Pat McAfee vs. Austin Theory. McAfee talks about everything he has accomplished from the NFL to his talk show, but he has always been a fan who wanted to wrestle. He even trained to wrestle with Rip Rogers before he came to WWE so he has a background. Vince McMahon was a guest on the Pat McAfee Show and offered McAfee a chance for a match. This wound up being against Theory, who has tormented him ever since, with McAfee chasing after him and annoying McMahon in the process.

Austin Theory vs. Pat McAfee

Vince McMahon personally introduces Theory (as a future Universal Champion). McAfee on the other hand has the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders with him in an appropriate entrance. Some right hands have Theory in trouble early but he goes to McAfee’s throat to cut him down. A jumping back elbow has Theory down again as the fans are rather into McAfee. There’s a hurricanrana for two but Theory plants him and smiles down at Vince.

McAfee manages a quick suplex for a breather and Theory heads out to the apron. They head outside and McAfee grabs a headset to say hi to his parents before pouring ice over Theory. Back in and a heck of a Swanton misses for McAfee so Theory grabs a belly to back slam for two.

Theory goes up but McAfee catches him on top, only to be shoved off. That’s fine with McAfee, who does a pretty sweet moonsault to land on his feet. A jump up to the top (that was cool) sets up a top rope superplex (McAfee shouldn’t be this good this soon) for a delayed two on Theory. Back up and Theory gets in a shot and tries A Town Down, which is countered into a rollup to give McAfee the pin at 9:43.

Rating: B. This was a heck of a celebrity match as McAfee got to show off his athleticism (that jump to the top into the superplex was very good). McAfee is one of those guys who seems to just “get” wrestling and that is one of the most valuable things anyone can have. McAfee had to win after the build to the match and it was good stuff, as McAfee can talk and actually back it up.

Post match McAfee celebrates and Vince is ticked. Vince is so ticked….that he takes his jacket off (the place is VERY interested). The shirt comes off and Vince gets in the ring (Cole: “WHY IS THERE A REFEREE IN THE RING???”). It seems that we’re doing this but Theory jumps McAfee from behind. Let’s ring that bell.

Vince McMahon vs. Pat McAfee

McMahon clotheslines him at the bell and then does it again, earning a YOU STILL GOT IT chant. The stall is on but McAfee Colts Up but McMahon distracts the referee, allowing Theory to crotch McAfee against the post. With McAfee down, McMahon gets a Dallas Cowboys football and punts it into McAfee’s stomach for the pin at 3:44.

Rating: D-. So that’s how the crowd gets killed after being on fire from the McAfee match. One might think it would have been a better idea to put Theory over if they wanted to go this way, but seeing McMahon in the ring for (probably) one last time is a special moment. That being said, this wasn’t a match for the most part and the ending was awful, but what else were you expecting?

Post match Vince and Theory hug and Vince seems a big scared by Theory’s music playing. Then the glass shatters and Vince has a better reason to be afraid. Steve Austin comes out, beats up Theory, gives McMahon the all time worst Stunner (as Vince falls down both before and after) and drinks beer (good thing it was ready in case he made a surprise appearance) with McAfee. Then he Stuns McAfee, who probably could not be more thrilled.

We look at Bianca Belair’s marching band entrance before she won the Raw Women’s Title.

Wrestlemania XXXIX is in Los Angeles.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns in a World Title unification match. Reigns has been Universal Champion for a year and a Lesnar has held the title for about five minutes. Now they’re unifying them because Reigns vs. Lesnar must headline at least one major event every year until the end of time.

Universal Title/WWE Title: Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Winner take all and Paul Heyman is here with Reigns (the Usos come to the ring with him but head to the back before the match). Heyman and Lesnar handle the intros (Lesnar has done that a time or two) before the latter takes off his gloves to start the match. Reigns hammers away and drives him into the corner a few times without much trouble. Three straight suplexes have Reigns in trouble and a clothesline puts him on the floor. Heyman offers a distraction though (Heyman: “I’ve always loved you. It was Roman’s idea!”) and Reigns hits a spear through the barricade.

Back in and Reigns hits another spear for two and a pair of Superman Punches drop Lesnar again. Lesnar is right back up with five German suplexes but the F5 is countered into a Superman Punch. Another spear is countered into the F5 to give Lesnar two of his own as they’re firmly in their signature formula here. Another F5 is countered and Reigns drives Lesnar into the referee in the corner.

A low blow and belt shot give Reigns two and Reigns spears him from behind (ala Lashley about two and a half hours ago, which commentary does note) for the same. Reigns tries another spear but lands in the Kimura, sending Reigns to the ropes this time. Reigns can be heard telling Heyman that his shoulder is “out”, only to spear Lesnar down for the pin at 12:17 (Heyman looked stunned on the pin).

Rating: C+. Yes the action was probably better than that but I’m so completely done with caring about these two having their same match over and over. WWE treated these two as the biggest stars in the company for so long that this is the only way they can finish Wrestlemania. That doesn’t make it interesting though, as Lesnar didn’t feel like a threat and they did the same match they have done almost every time after their first. But hey, at least the ultra dominant Reigns is now even more ultra dominant right? To be fair that wound up working, but finding a better way there would have been appreciated.

Reigns celebrates and a lot of pyro ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a weird one as there are good things about the show, but a lot of it feels like they were trying to fill in time. Too many of the matches came off as things that they needed to do rather than things they wanted to do and it made things a lot less interesting than the previous night. The good stuff is good and it had some moments (one more time for Austin and McMahon, the Knoxville/Zayn stuff and the title unification) but it felt like a pale comparison to Night One, which isn’t something to brag about whatsoever. Not a bad show at all, but you might want to pick and choose.

Overall Overall Rating: B. The show overall is good, but more of the good comes from Night One, which had the action to go with the moments. If they wanted to balance it out a lot more, moving Cody’s return to the other night would have helped, as outside of the main event, the second night didn’t have the deepest lineup. It’s a rather good Wrestlemania overall, but man it feels like an eternity has passed in the last year. Night One is definitely worth a watch though, as it feels like a Wrestlemania. Balance it out a bit and cut down on Night Two (or give us one really long night) and it’s that much better, but this did work.

 

Ratings Comparison

RKBro vs. Street Profits vs. Alpha Academy

Original: B-
Redo: B-

Omos vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: D+
Redo: C-

Johnny Knoxville vs. Sami Zayn

Original: C+
Redo: B-

Sasha Banks/Naomi vs. Natalya/Shayna Baszler vs. Carmella/Queen Zelina vs. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley

Original: D+
Redo: C

AJ Styles vs. Edge

Original: B-
Redo: B

New Day vs. Brawling Brutes

Original: N/A
Redo: N/A

Pat McAfee vs. Austin Theory

Original: C+
Redo: B

Vince McMahon vs. Pat McAfee

Original: D+
Redo: D-

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: C+
Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: C
Redo: B-

Overall Overall Rating

Original: B-
Redo: B

So the second night was mostly better across the board and then the overall overall rating is barely up? That’s a weird one, but this show was a better sit after a year away so maybe it does have some staying power.




Wrestlemania XL Night Two: They Warmed Up

Wrestlemania XL Night Two
Date: April 7, 2024
Location: Lincoln Financial Field, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee, Corey Graves
God Bless American: The War And Treaty

It’s time for the second half of the biggest show of the year and things are not looking great for our hero. Cody Rhodes and Seth Rollins lost to the Bloodline last night and that means Rhodes’ shot against Roman Reigns will be under Bloodline rules. That should make for a big main event and we have quite the stacked card to go along with the big one. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night One if you need a recap.

I was in attendance for this show, sitting in the upper deck with the entrance on my right.

Michael Cole recaps the main event situation and runs down the card. He also brings up that it isn’t as cold, which is absolutely true.

Meek Mill narrates the opening video, which is about finishing the story.

The War And Treaty sing God Bless America.

Here is Stephanie McMahon of all people to welcome us to the show, saying we are now in the Paul Levesque Era. She talks about being at the first Wrestlemania and asks if we’re ready.

World Heavyweight Championship: Seth Rollins vs. Drew McIntyre

McIntyre is challenging and is played to the ring by the Ulster Scottish Pipe Band while Rollins has the Philadelphia Mummers, a large group of musicians who are in outfits that might be even more outlandish than his own. CM Punk is the guest commentator and is in fine form, saying that if McIntyre has a pipe band, Punk has a pipe bomb. The bell rings and McIntyre hits a Claymore for two at five seconds in.

Rollins, whose knee is banged up from last night, rolls outside with McIntyre following to send him into the post. McIntyre grabs a fan’s phone and takes a quick picture before going outside to yell at Punk. That’s enough of a distraction for Rollins to hit a quick Pedigree on the floor. Back in and the Stomp gives Rollins two of his own as we are not even three minutes in yet.

Another Pedigree is countered with a backdrop and McIntyre hits the Glasgow Kiss. McIntyre tries another Claymore but gets countered into the Pedigree. Rollins’ knee gives out so the followup Stomp only gets two and they both need a breather. Rollins goes up for a top rope stomp but only hits mat, meaning the knee is hurt again. The Futureshock gives McIntyre two so he yells at Punk and calls for a GTS.

Punk thinks that means McIntyre is putting the fans to sleep but Rollins slips out, only to get Claymored for two more. It’s time to load up the announcers’ table but the powerbomb is escaped. The Stomp onto the table connects and they head back inside where a quick Claymore gives McIntyre another near fall. Punk: “You gotta hit him with that GTS McIntyre!” Another Claymore gives McIntyre the pin and the title at 10:32.

Rating: B-. This was the kind of match that Brock Lesnar specialized in and it made sense for McIntyre to come out swinging like he did here. Rollins was banged up and just wrestled a long match the night before so testing him early was a good idea. There was zero reason for Rollins to keep the title here and it made for a great way to open the show, as a title change is always a big deal.

Post match McIntyre gets the big, emotional moment and goes outside to present the title to his wife. With that out of the way, McIntyre turns to Punk and goes over to talk some trash. Punk points out that he can’t hear anything McIntyre is saying with the headphones on so McIntyre tells him to suck it. That’s enough for Punk to sweep the leg and hit McIntyre in the head with his brace. I think you know what’s coming and indeed here is Damian Priest with the briefcase. That briefcase goes upside McIntyre’s head and it’s time to cash it in.

World Heavyweight Championship: Drew McIntyre vs. Damian Priest

Priest is challenging and wins in 10 seconds with South Of Heaven.

Post match Priest celebrates with Judgment Day as Punk applauds McIntyre in a great troll moment.

Bobby Lashley/Street Profits vs. Final Testament

Street fight with Snoop Dogg on commentary and Bubba Ray Dudley of all people as guest referee. B Fab, Paul Ellering and Scarlett are here too. It’s already time for a table to start, with Snoop saying it’s picnic time with Yogi Bear. The AOP cut off the Profits and the villains beat down Lashley with the kendo sticks inside. A neckbreaker onto a chair gives Kross two on Lashley with the Profits making a save. Dawkins gets powerbombed down but with B Fab having to make a save.

Back up and Lashley breaks up the Super Collider and takes Kross down with a Downward Spiral. Ford gets to show off with a big flip dive over the post to take out the AOP, leaving Lashley to beat on Kross with a chair. Scarlett breaks up the Hurt Lock so B Fab makes the save, including a Russian legsweep to drive Scarlett through the table at ringside.

Kross is back up with a Saito suplex to Lashley before putting him through a chair for two. That kickout doesn’t work for Kross, who yells at Ray, allowing the Profits to get back up for What’s Up. Ray even puts his glasses on and says GET THE TABLES. Kross is laid on the table, which immediately breaks. Therefore another table is brought in and the frog splash puts Kross through it to give Ford the pin at 8:34.

Rating: C. This feud wasn’t interesting coming in and the match didn’t make it that much better. It was two teams who didn’t have much going for them and their feud has gone on for a rather long time now. It also felt more like a way to get Dogg and Dudley out there, which actually might have been more interesting than the match itself.

The winners celebrate with Snoop Dogg.

We look at last night’s main event.

Paul Heyman more or less guarantees that Roman Reigns is winning under Bloodline Rules.

We recap LA Knight vs. AJ Styles. Knight is the new, brash talker who has the fans behind him but Styles doesn’t like him. Styles cost him in the Elimination Chamber and now Knight wants revenge in one of his biggest matches ever.

LA Knight vs. AJ Styles

Styles debuts new music here. They start the fight in a hurry until Styles misses a charge and crashes out to the floor. That lets Knight ram him into the announcers’ table over and over but Styles goes after the knee back inside. There’s a shinbreaker to keep Knight in trouble but he Russian legsweeps his way to freedom.

A springboard tornado DDT (that’s a new one) gives Knight two but Styles escapes a superplex. The belly to back faceplant gives Styles two so he goes up, only to have Knight catch him with the jumping German superplex to send Styles flying. That’s fine with Styles, who takes Knight down again and hits a baseball slide to drive the knee into the post.

They go outside where Knight gets in a posting and rips up the floor pad (you don’t see that much anymore), only to get dropped onto them. The count is beaten so Styles drops a springboard 450 for two. Back up and the BFT is countered into a rollup but the Styles Clash is blocked as well. Knight breaks up the Phenomenal Forearm and finishes with the BFT at 12:23.

Rating: B-. This might not have been a classic but it was around the level of a strong TV match. What matters most is Knight winning of course, as he has been needing that big win for a long time. Knight is someone who is going to be around for a bit and thankfully this gets his momentum back up. Styles seems like he is slowing down a good bit, though he’s still certainly good for a match like this.

In May, Smackdown and King/Queen of the Ring are both coming to Saudi Arabia. Much like last night’s Saudi moment, this wasn’t well received live.

We look at the Hall Of Fame 2024 class.

Here is the Class:

US Express (in Bray Wyatt shirts)
Thunderbolt Patterson (with Gerald Brisco)
Bull Nakano (nice reception)
Lia Maivia (represented by her daughter)
Muhammad Ali (not represented at all)
Paul Heyman (carrying Roman Reigns’ title and coming out to the old ECW theme)

WWE did community stuff this week.

We recap Logan Paul defending the US Title against Randy Orton and Kevin Owens. Paul is annoying, both guys want to beat him up and win the title. End of story.

US Title: Logan Paul vs. Kevin Owens vs. Randy Orton

Paul is defending and rides a big Prime truck to the stage, where he meets the Prime mascot. Owens on the other hand runs into Sami Zayn for a pep talk in the back. With that out of the way, Owens uses the golf cart he stole on Smackdown and even backs up to give Orton a (rather fast) lift. Paul bails straight to the floor to start but it turns out that a blond professional wrestler is easy to find at ringside during a wrestling match. Owens and Orton take turns sending him into the announcers’ table but Paul sends them into each other back inside. Paul: “Y’all fight!”

That doesn’t work either as Orton elbows Paul in the face and Owens adds a backsplash…but only one of them can cover. Owens and Orton slug it out until Paul cuts them both off with a double buckshot lariat. Paul mocks Orton’s pose before hammering away n Owens in the corner. The fans chant for various non-Prime beverages until Owens sends them both into the corner for a double Cannonball.

The Swanton hits Paul’s raised knees, allowing Paul to hit his own Swanton. Paul actually out uppercuts Orton, who comes right back with the snap powerslam. A double hanging DDT puts Owens and Paul down at the same time before taking Owens up top. That’s broken up by Paul, who gets caught with the spinning superplex. The moonsault hits Paul but Orton is right back with the RKO to Owens…for two. Now there’s something you do not see very often.

Paul finds the brass knuckles and clocks Orton with them….for two more. That’s another fairly nutty kickout and quite the stretch. Orton is back up (way too quickly after a brass knuckles shot) with an RKO to Paul but can’t cover. Instead he takes the knuckles away and tosses them but the Prime mascot pulls Paul outside.

The mascot is IShowSpeed, a video game streamer, so Orton RKO’s him onto the announcers’ table. Back in and Owens hits a pop up powerbomb on Paul and a Stunner to Orton for two. Another pop up powerbomb is countered into an RKO (that was sweet) but Paul shoves Orton outside and hits the frog splash to pin Owens at 17:38.

Rating: C+. This was a pretty long match and a rather formula based triple threat, which isn’t the best thing to see. The action was enough to keep it going, with that last RKO being quite impressive, but other than that, nothing stood out for the most part. I wasn’t exactly thrilled with this one and it should have been better than it was.

We recap Iyo Sky vs. Bayley for the former’s WWE Women’s Title. Bayley started Damage CTRL but Sky and the rest of the team seemed to dislike her. Then Bayley overhead them insulting her in Japanese and the whole thing fell apart. Now Bayley needs to prove she can do it herself.

WWE Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Iyo Sky

Bayley is challenging and has an ancient Egypt style entrance (yeah it’s weird) and what sounds like new music. Feeling out process to start with Sky grabbing the arm as they roll out to the floor. Sky gets back in and tries a dive but Bayley cuts her off again. Now Bayley hits her own dive but seems to come up favoring her knee. You can’t do that with Sky, who goes right after the knee to take over again.

A double stomp to the ribs gets one on Bayley and they head outside, where Sky goes to the barricade. The dive is pulled out of the air with a spinebuster but Sky catches her on top again. With Bayley knocked outside again, Sky hits the moonsault to send them both crashing onto the floor. Back inside and Bayley manages a sunset bomb into the corner for two but Sky’s bridging German suplexes gets the same.

Bayley avoids the Over The Moonsault but her top rope elbow only hits mat. Sky gets a crossface before switching over to STF. That’s broken up as well and the Bayley To Belly gives Bayley two. Sky is right back with a butterfly backbreaker and Over The Moonsault connects….for two. A bottom and middle rope moonsault connect for Sky but she misses the rope version. The Rose Plant is blocked so Bayley grabs a belly to back suplex and drops a top rope elbow. The Rose Plant connects this time to give Bayley the pin and the title at 14:23.

Rating: B. This did exactly what it should have done and somehow there was no interference. What mattered here was Bayley getting to show that she could do it on her own as she becomes a much more firm heroine again. This was a good match with Bayley fighting through the injury and even showing she can be something of a high flier in her own right. Heck of a match here and Bayley is back on top for the first time in a long time.

Celebrities are here.

The Philadelphia Eagles cheerleaders and Snoop Dogg are here to announce tonight’s attendance: 72,755, for a two day total of 145,298. That’s the two day total listed, but because it’s Snoop Dogg, he says 145,420.

We recap Cody Rhodes challenging Roman Reigns for the WWE Universal Title in the main event. Rhodes came up short last year but it is time for his second chance. He is completely up against the wall as it is Bloodline Rules, but Rhodes is fighting with a big purpose.

WWE Universal Title: Roman Reigns vs. Cody Rhodes

Rhodes, with Brandi Rhodes and wearing a skull mask as he comes up on the riser, is challenging and comes out to an absolute roar. Reigns is played to the ring by an orchestra, which is good, but doesn’t feel nearly as epic. We get the Big Match Intros to start and only Paul Heyman is here as a second. They stare at each other to start until Rhodes drives him into the corner to no avail. A running shoulder puts Rhodes down but Reigns doesn’t follow up, meaning we can reset a bit.

Reigns misses a charge into the post so it’s time to head outside. Rhodes grabs a table but Reigns gets in a cheap shot and puts it right back underneath the ring. Instead Reigns whips out a kendo stick and starts hammering away but Rhodes knocks it out of Reigns’ hands. A Figure Four has Reigns in trouble, which doesn’t last long as he gets to the ropes rather quickly. They fight into the crowd and onto a platform, where Rhodes manages a suplex.

Reigns is sent back to ringside and then counters the Disaster Kick with a hard powerbomb to put Rhodes in trouble again. The trash talk is on and Reigns grabs the cravate to keep Rhodes down. A PerfectPlex of all things gets two on Rhodes (McAfee: “I almost flipped my pencil.”) and Reigns fires off the corner clotheslines. Rhodes comes back with shots to the face of his own and they’re both down for a breather.

Back up and the slugout is on with Rhodes getting the better of things, setting up a powerslam. The Disaster Kick gets two but Reigns is back with his own Cross Rhodes for two. Reigns to Heyman: “I just wanted to shove it in his face.” Heyman: “I loved it.” The Superman Punch misses though and the Bionic Elbow puts Reigns down. They head outside again and let’s set up that announcers’ table again. The delay lets Reigns get in a low blow and he puts Rhodes through the table.

Back in and a Superman Punch gives Reigns two, followed by a Cody Cutter to give Rhodes the same. Rhodes hits a spear of his own for two more, followed by the Cross Rhodes. Cue Jimmy Uso and yeah you knew he was coming. Cue Jey Uso to go after Jimmy so they brawl on the ramp. That means Jey can hit a spear off the apron, sending them through some luckily placed tables. The distraction lets Reigns hit a quick spear for two, meaning frustration is setting in.

They guillotine choke goes on but they crash out to the floor for the break. Rhodes is up first and spears Reigns through the barricade for quite the twist on the move. Back in and a pair of Cross Rhodes connect for Rhodes until Solo Sikoa comes in with the Samoan Spike). The spear/Samoan Spike combination connects on Rhodes for two, leaving Sikoa annoyed.

Cue John Cena to take Sikoa outside for the AA through the announcers’ table. That brings out the Rock, who stares Cena down and immediately plants him with the Rock Bottom. Rock whips out the weightlifting belt….and the Shield’s music plays, with Seth Rollins sneaking in from behind with a chair. Not that it matters as Reigns Superman Punches him down. Then a gong strikes, the lights go out, and Undertaker is here. A chokeslam plants Rock and Undertaker disappears again. Reigns picks up the chair and goes after Rollins, allowing Rhodes to hit three straight Cross Rhodes for the pin at 33:34.

Rating: B+. Yeah he had to win the thing and there was no other option. Reigns had the title for over three and a half years and it was time for some fresh blood in there. The staggered interferences was a brilliant idea as it was one big reaction after another as the people kept stepping up to fight back against the Bloodline. The title change is what mattered though, as it was time for Reigns to lose the belt. I can’t say I see Cody as the long term star, but this absolutely had to be his moment and they nailed it.

Post match a bunch of wrestlers come out to celebrate with Rhodes, who wants a microphone. He praises Bruce Prichard and HHH for making Wrestlemania feel special before bringing both of them out. The big celebration wraps up up.

The highlight package finishes the show.

Overall Rating: B+. Maybe it was the warmer weather but this was a much more enjoyable time than Night One. It helped that it felt like so many things went down but they did a great job of making it feel huge. The cash in worked, Bayley won the title and Rhodes gets his big epic moment. That’s a heck of a way to use a night and WWE bounced back from a not so great Saturday. Awesome show here, as it feels we’re in a new era.

Overall Overall Rating: B. The best thing I can say here is that WWE finally pulled the trigger and finished Reigns. There are all kinds of things going on but that is the story that will be remembered on this show. The action was mostly good and it covered the biggest stories in WWE, with the main event being a total blast. Not an all timer, but the second night more than picked the first one up.

Results
Drew McIntyre b. Seth Rollins – Claymore
Damian Priest b. Drew McIntyre – South Of Heaven
Bobby Lashley/Street Profits b. Final Testament
LA Knight b. AJ Styles – BFT –
Logan Paul b. Randy Orton and Kevin Owens – Frog splash to Owens
Bayley b. Iyo Sky – Rose Plant
Cody Rhodes b. Roman Reigns – Cross Rhodes

 

 

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Wrestlemania XL Night Two Preview

So it’s time for Night Two and again we’ll do a quick one here as there is more than enough to talk about otherwise.

Seth Rollins b. Drew McIntyre. Yes that sounds insane and I hope I’m wrong but this feels like Priest’s time to cash in, either here or tomorrow night on Raw. That knee injury is too good to pass up and Priest doesn’t have the Tag Team Titles to worry about.

Logan Paul retains the US Title over Kevin Owens and Randy Orton. Paul is a star, Orton doesn’t need the title and Owens is better chasing the belt than holding it.

The Pride b. Final Testament. This should be fun but it needs to wrap up the feud once and for all. Lashley can Hurt Lock Kross to get rid of him and get a nice moment for a change.

LA Knight b. AJ Styles. Is there any reason to put Styles over here? Knight has been needing that big win for awhile now and while this might not be the biggest thing in the world, it’s certainly better than anything else he’s gotten.

Iyo Sky b. Bayley. You need a villain to win one of the bigger matches and this feels like the right spot. With Cargill, Belair and Naomi around, a heel champion makes more sense.

Cody Rhodes b. Roman Reigns. He has to, as this feels like the Assemble The Avengers moment with a bunch of people coming out to help FINALLY take Reigns out and end the Bloodline for good. Or at least knock them out of power.

Overall, this feels like the weaker of the two cards but it could be a lot worse. As usual, this is ALL about Reigns and whatever he is going to be able to do, as hopefully Cody can FINALLY finish the story and move on to something else already.




Wrestlemania XL Night One: It Got Cold. Really Cold.

Wrestlemania XL Night One
Date: April 6, 2024
Location: Lincoln Financial Field, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Corey Graves, Michael Cole
National Anthem: Coco Jones

We have arrived. It’s time for the biggest show of the year and in this case, the main event of night one is going to have an impact on that of night two. We have Cody Rhodes/Seth Rollins teaming up with the Bloodline, with the winners determining the stipulations for Rhodes’ title shot against Roman Reigns. Other than that, Rhea Ripley defends the Raw Women’s Title against Becky Lynch. Let’s get to it.

Note that I was in the stadium for this show, sitting in the upper deck with the stage on my right.

There is a new Then, Now and Forever video, which is rather awesome looking and has a lot of blue.

Coco Jones sings the National Anthem, which is a big change from decades of America the Beautiful.

Michael Cole welcomes us to the show and talks about the main event.

The opening video talks about the greatness of Philadelphia before moving on to the greatness that is Wrestlemania. Alas no Sylvester Stallone, but we’ll have to settle for Meek Mill.

Here is HHH (er sorry: Paul “Triple H” Levesque) for the big opening. He loves this stuff and welcomes us to the show. End of appearance.

We recap Becky Lynch challenging Rhea Ripley for the Raw Women’s Title. Lynch was the biggest star in the world and needs to prove that she still has it against Ripley, who is the best in the world right now. I’ve heard worse ideas.

Raw Women’s Title: Rhea Ripley vs. Becky Lynch

Ripley is defending and is played to the ring by Motionless In White. Lynch counters this by….having strep throat. Ouch. Ripley shoves her into the corner to start but Lynch snaps the arm over the ropes to go after the previously injured wrist. They head outside for a bit, with Ripley firing off shoulders in the corner back inside. A suplex gives Ripley two and she stomps Lynch down, setting up an Eddie frog splash.

The dance takes too long though, allowing Lynch to grab a top rope armdrag. A tornado DDT plants Ripley and Lynch drapes her over the ropes for the middle rope legdrop to the back. Back in and Ripley faceplants Lynch to take over and a knee to the face gets two. Riptide is blocked though and Lynch goes for the cross armbreaker, which is….eventually broken up with three straight powerbombs.

The arm is ok enough for Ripley to kick Lynch in the face for two, setting up the exchange of strikes. Ripley misses a charge into the post and Lynch grabs the Disarm-Her in the corner. That’s reversed into the Prism Trap with a bodyscissors but Lynch stacks her up for two instead. Riptide is reversed into a release Manhandle Slam for two and Lynch is getting frustrated. Another Disarm-Her attempt is countered into the Riptide for two and now it’s Ripley’s turn to be stunned.

They go up top where Lynch grabs a superplex and floats over into the Disarm-Her. That’s countered into an electric chair and they fall over the top to the floor without breaking it up. The electric chair drop onto the floor has Lynch crashing down hard, followed by a frog splash for two back inside. Back up and they head to the top again, where Lynch’s super Manhandle Slam is blocked. Instead it’s a Riptide onto the buckle (that’s a new one) into the regular Riptide to retain the title at 17:08.

Rating: B. This felt like both a rather good match as well as an official passing of the torch. While Ripley had been the biggest star in the women’s division for a good while, she needed to beat the biggest women’s star ever to cement her status. It was a heck of a fight and Lynch certainly made it interesting, but this was about Ripley getting her big title defense and it worked well. Heck of an opener here.

Pretty Deadly preview the six team ladder match, complete with impressions of the teams. These two are always hilarious because they lean into the cheese that hard.

Tag Team Titles: Judgment Day vs. Awesome Truth vs. DIY vs. New Day vs. Austin Theory/Grayson Waller vs. New Catch Republic

Judgment Day is defending in a ladder match, with the two sets of titles hanging up in different places (that sounds splitty to me). They’re going rapid fire with the entrances for obvious reasons, but they go so fast that the Awesome Truth’s graphics are still up for New Catch Republic, with commentary mocking the production team as a result. Xavier Woods is in Consequences Creed gear, which is rather appropriate here.

It’s a big brawl to start (of course) and a bunch of people go after Priest, leaving Theory and Waller to climb a ladder each. That’s broken up as well with a bunch of people going up in a less than successful attempt. The champs come back in and wreck people until Bate torture racks Balor and a ladder for an upside down airplane spin. You know, because he can do that. The Republic goes up top on the ladder at ringside and moonsault down onto a pile of people each.

Back in and Bate goes up so Priest Razor’s Edges Dunne into the ladder for a big double crash down. Miz gets double teamed so Truth….stands on the apron and begs for the tag. Naturally Miz gets away and makes the diving tag, allowing Truth to use initiate John Cena’s finishing sequence on Balor.

The crowd counts the pin off the AA so Truth thinks he won but DIY is back in. Truth has Johnny Gargano tune up the band (because Truth thinks he’s Shawn Michaels) and it’s a superkick to Priest, setting up Ciampa’s Fairy Tale Ending. DIY and Awesome Truth decide to go after a title each but Theory and Waller make the save…and win the Smackdown Tag Team Titles at 7:31.

New Day cuts off Theory from going for the other belts before the Republic throws Waller off a ladder and through another one at ringside (Waller held onto his belt of course). DIY clean house and load up some tables at ringside (oh dear), with Truth setting up another one on another side. New Day is back in and set Ciampa on another bridged ladder, with Woods hitting the Limit Break.

Kofi goes up and Trust Falls onto a bunch of people on the floor but Theory cuts off Woods’ climb. The Republic breaks that up and the Birminghammer drops Theory again. A slingshot DDT through a table takes out Gargano and Dunne, leaving Ciampa to hit an Air Raid Crash off the ladder to plant Bate.

Truth goes up but cue JD McDonagh to pull him down and help Balor climb up. New Day isn’t having that and chairs Balor down, setting up a toss to send McDonagh through the tables. Priest comes back in to wreck New Day until Miz cuts him off. Priest chokeslams Miz down as the ladder is breaking underneath them. A fresh ladder is brought in, with Truth AA’ing Priest to the floor, leaving Truth to climb the ladder and get the belts for the win at 17:32.

Rating: C+. It was a six way tag team ladder match with twelve people involved, plus McDonagh interfering. There is only so much you’re going to be able to get out of a mess like this and they did about as well as possible. It’s a fun match with some big crashes, but the titles being split is what matters most here. I’m not sure they needed to be, but I’ll take this over two people with so many belts at once.

Olympic gold medal winning wrestler Jordan Burroughs is here.

We recap Rey Mysterio/Andrade vs. Dominik Mysterio/Santos Escobar. Rey and Escobar have been feuding since Escobar turned on him in November but Dominik got involved to teach his father a lesson again. Both of them have partners so let’s have a tag match.

Rey Mysterio/Andrade vs. Santos Escobar/Dominik Mysterio

The LWO and Legado del Fantasma are here too. Rey snaps off a headscissors to Escobar to start and it’s quickly off to Dominik. Everything breaks down in a hurry with the villains being sent outside. Andrade goes up so Rey sits on his shoulders and they dive onto the floor for a double crossbody while still being attached. Back in and Dominik breaks up the 619 before sending Rey outside again.

Escobar takes over on the floor and it’s a slingshot hilo to give Dominik two back inside. Dominik elbows him down for two more and a double basement dropkick gives Escobar the same. The seated abdominal stretch goes on as commentary talks about Carlito being unhappy with not being Andrade’s partner here. Rey Code Reds his way to freedom and the tag brings in Andrade to clean house.

Andrade’s running knees hit Dominik in the corner but he neckbreakers his way out of trouble. Rey comes in to beat up on the now legal Escobar as everything breaks down. Some Legado interference lets Escobar hit a super hurricanrana. Everyone else gets in a fight at ringside, including Wilde’s insane slingshot dive to the floor. Dominik grabs a chair but two rather large men in masks grab both the chair and Dominik, who is sent inside. Andrade takes out Dominik, leaving Rey to hit a top rope splash to pin Escobar at 11:00.

Rating: C+. I’m a little surprised that Rey beat Dominik (albeit indirectly this time) for the second year in a row but at least Andrade seems to be getting a push. Carlito might not be happy with it though and that opens up a door. If nothing else, this might be the end of Rey vs. Escobar, which is kind of a shame as Escobar felt like he had potential.

The masked men are former Philadelphia Eagles Jason Kelce and Lane Johnson.

We recap Jey Uso vs. Jimmy Uso. It’s a battle of the twins, with the two of them being so close for so long until Jimmy decided to side with the Bloodline against Jey. This included Jimmy costing Jey the World Title at Summerslam….and now the match is taking place eight months later.

Jey Uso vs. Jimmy Uso

Jey is rapped to the ring by Lil Wayne and then dives onto Jimmy to start the brawl before the bell. They get back inside for the bell and Jey hits the big dive to drop him again. Back in and a high crossbody gives Jey two but Jimmy grabs something close to a pop up Samoan drop (it doesn’t quite land). Jimmy slowly kicks him down, then does it again a few more times. The Superfly Splash misses so Jey hits a superkick of his own.

They slug it out (YEET/NO YEET) before trading jumping enziguris. An exchange of superkicks goes to Jey, with Jimmy being knocked into the corner. Jey kicks him down and loads up another big one but Jimmy begs off. Jimmy apologizes and Jey (eventually) accepts it, earning the cheap superkick from Jimmy in the process. The Superfly Splash gives Jimmy two but Jey hits a spear into his own Superfly Splash for the pin at 11:09

Rating: D. Oh yeah that didn’t work. Its a mixture of a few problems, starting with the fact that they wrestle such similar styles. You can only get so much out of that many kicks to the face and then a lame fake apology. The other problem is there was zero reason to believe Jimmy was going to win. In the time since Summerslam, Jey has turned into a solid midcard star who can be taken seriously. On the other hand, Jimmy is little more than a comedy goof most of the time.

This is a match that made sense on paper, but it needed to be a much more physical brawl and it needed to come about seven months earlier. As it is, it was a match that should have been a good brawl but instead it felt like “ok they’re having their match so they can say they did it at Wrestlemania.” This was a really bad miss and that’s a shame.

Ad for WWE Experience in Saudi Arabia. This was LOUDLY booed in the stadium.

We recap the Kabuki Warriors vs. Naomi/Bianca Belair/Jade Cargill, which is pretty much “these three women are amazing together” and Damage CTRL are little more than designated victims.

Naomi/Bianca Belair/Jade Cargill vs. Damage CTRL

Damage CTRL have a bunch of Japanese women dancing before their entrance, while the other three all step off a scissor lift for individual entrances. This includes Cargill, who has hacked off a lot of her hair. Naomi sends Asuka into the corner to start but gets caught by Sane, who sends her outside. The top rope elbow to the floor hits a standing Naomi and it’s back inside so Asuka can hit Naomi in the face a few times.

Naomi kicks her way to freedom and hands it off to Belair as they’re saving Cargill for the big moment. Belair grabs a vertical suplex while marching around the ring, because of course she can do that. A handspring moonsault hits all three villains for two but Kai cuts off the tag to Cargill.

The running knee gives Asuka two on Belair but she’s right back up to hand it off to Cargill for the big reaction. House is quickly cleaned and an over the shoulder piledriver plants Sane. Everything breaks down and Belair hits the hair whip on Asuka (you could hear that crack at the top of the stadium and my goodness it’s amazing). The KOD drops Asuka and Jaded finishes Kai at 8:05.

Rating: C+. The match was never in doubt and they did this exactly as they should have. This was 100% about Jade getting the big tag at the end and cleaning house to win, which they nailed to perfection. They didn’t risk her doing anything dumb or having the chance to get exposed, making this about as well done as it could have been. Perfect presentation, good enough match.

Post match the winners get the big hero pose and that is something WWE is going to want to push for a good while.

We recap Gunther vs. Sami Zayn for the former’s Intercontinental Title. Gunther is pretty much the most dominant champion of all time and Zayn isn’t sure if he still has it. Chad Gable has given him a heck of a pep talk and training to help him believe in himself, as Zayn is still worried about failing again. Now Zayn is fired up and that’s a threat to Gunther and the title.

Zayn is in the back with his wife and son, the latter of whom believes he can do it. His family leaves and Chad Gable comes in to say he believes in Zayn too, but Zayn is on his own tonight. Oh and he owes Gable a favor later. Zayn does the long walk towards the ring and runs into Kevin Owens, who gives him a big hug. Just play the Rocky theme already. Or one of the catchiest themes in wrestling history.

Intercontinental Title: Sami Zayn vs. Gunther

Gunther is defending and Zayn’s wife is in the front row. Commentary is all over with the Rocky references, even saying that Zayn fights great but Gunther is a great fighter. Zayn ducks an early chop and strikes away but gets caught with a German suplex. A big boot drops Zayn again and Gunther lays him on top for the boot choke. Back up and Gunther fires off the chops but Zayn unloads with rights and lefts.

A half and half suplex drops Gunther but he’s back up with a big clothesline. It’s to early for the powerbomb though and Zayn grabs the tornado DDT. The Blue Thunder Bomb is countered and Gunther pulls him into the sleeper in the middle of the ring. With Zayn getting close to the ropes, Gunther drops him with a German suplex. Zayn manages the exploder into the corner but Gunther dropkicks him into the corner.

The powerbomb gives Gunther two and now he’s looking frustrated. Gunther clotheslines him hard again and hits two more powerbombs for two, meaning it’s time to yell at Zayn’s wife. Another powerbomb puts Zayn down and it’s a top rope splash to make it worse. Gunther does it again and still won’t cover, instead yelling at Zayn’s wife again. That’s somehow enough to wake Zayn up so Gunther goes up top again, allowing Zayn to hit a Helluva Kick. The brainbuster onto the buckle sets up a pair of Helluva Kicks to give Zayn the pin and the title in the big upset at 15:05.

Rating: A-. Maybe it’s that I’m a big Rocky fan but they nailed every bit of this. Gunther had been the unstoppable monster for so long and Zayn is about as perfect of an underdog as you can get in today’s wrestling. It was a great story, a heck of a match and an incredible moment when Zayn FINALLY beat Gunther. After such a long reign, Gunther is going to be just fine as he moves up to the main event scene. This was about as perfect as it could have been and I loved it quite a bit.

Here’s a four minute video on how great Wrestlemania really is. I kept waiting for this to go somewhere and it just didn’t.

Pat McAfee recaps the ending of the Rey Mysterio match earlier, complete with telestrator.

Adam Pearce and Nick Aldis thank the fans for the attendance of 72,543.

Celebrities are here.

Wrestlemania Sunday rundown.

We recap the Rock/Roman Reigns vs. Cody Rhodes/Seth Rollins. Rock has returned and joined forces with Reigns as we have something of a Rhodes vs. Anoa’i Family war, plus the combined efforts to dethrone Reigns at any cost. Rock has made it very personal with Cody, even bringing Cody’s mother into things. The deal here is that while Cody has a shot against Reigns set, the stipulations will be set in the tag match. If the Bloodline wins, it’s anything goes tomorrow, but if Cody/Rollins win, it will be a normal match with the Bloodline barred from ringside.

The Rock/Roman Reigns vs. Cody Rhodes/Seth Rollins

The entrances are incredibly long, with Rollins wearing something that could be described as clothes and Rock having a theme of reaching his final form and walking through a flaming Brahma Bull logo (while carrying the People’s Title which was given to him at the Hall Of Fame). From the start of the recaps to the opening bell (including Big Match Intros): about 25 minutes.

The bell rings and the four of them stare at each other for about a minute and a half until Reigns and Rollins start things off, with the first contact coming over two and a half minutes in. Reigns powers him down without much trouble but Rollins kicks him in the ribs. Cody comes in for some jabs which don’t get him very far. Rollins tags himself back in and NOW Rock wants in. The slow, dramatic tag does in fact bring him in and the fans are rather pleased with Rock.

Rollins gets shoved down again and hammers away, setting up the running clothesline out of the corner. It’s off to Cody and the fans are behind Rock again. They fight over a lockup and don’t get very far until Rhodes takes him into the corner and strikes away. Some double teaming has Rock in trouble as commentary talks about whether or not the Rock needed to save WWE.

All four get in for another showdown and now it’s time to go outside for a brawl. Rock tells the referee that he’s fired if he counts while they’re on the floor before brawling with Rollins in the crowd. Cody and Reigns fight up to the stage where a suplex drops Reigns again. Rock spits some water in Rollins’ face and Cody is thrown off the ramp (not that far mind you) for a crash. Rollins sends Rock back inside but Reigns takes out Rollins’ knee to turn things around.

Back in and Rock starts going after the bad knee before it’s Reigns coming in to kick at the knee as well. A half crab stays on the knee, followed by a whip into the steps on the floor. They go back inside where Rollins is whipped hard into the buckle, allowing Reigns to fire off the hard clotheslines. The Superman Punch is countered into a neckbreaker but Rock isn’t about to let the tag go through that quickly.

A low blow hits Rollins, with the referee having to apologize to Cody for not being able to do anything about it. Rollins fights back again and sends Reigns outside…where Reigns can cut off the diving tag attempt. Rock grabs the eternally awful Sharpshooter so Cody comes in with the big slap for the break. Rollins hits a superkick and a Stomp but can’t follow up because of the knee.

The tag brings in Cody a few seconds later and house is quickly cleaned. There’s the powerslam into the Disaster Kick to put Reigns down and the Cody Cutter gets two. Another Disaster Kick is countered with the Superman Punch and Reigns is not happy about his nose being cut. The spear misses and a top rope Cody Cutter…is more like a top rope elbow to the jaw instead.

Either way it puts Reigns down for a frog splash to give Rollins two. Rollins’ stomp is countered with a powerbomb for two but Cody is back in for the superkick party. The Stomp into Cross Rhodes gets two with Rock pulling the referee out. A low blow into the spear gives Reigns two on Cody and Rock is ticked. Reigns grabs the guillotine and Rock even holds Cody’s legs down until Rollins is back in with a stomp for the save.

Rock sends Rollins outside and gets the tag (because we need tags again) before bringing out the MAMA RHODES belt. Said Mama Rhodes (at ringside) yells at Rock but Cody knocks the belt away. The Bionic Elbow connects with Rock, who is right back with the spinebuster. The People’s Elbow is countered with the Cody Cutter, only to have Reigns break up Cross Rhodes.

Back up and Reigns’ spear hits Rock by mistake, setting up stereo Pedigrees for two. Rollins dives onto Reigns outside and the other two load up the announcers’ table. Rock gets the better of things and loads up a Rock Bottom but Rollins grabs Cody’s leg, meaning Cody can hit a Rock Bottom through the table. Reigns spears Rollins through the barricade and everyone is down.

It’s Reigns back up with the apron boot to Cody but Cody slugs his way to Cross Rhodes. Another Cross Rhodes connects but Rock hits him in the back with the weightlifting belt. A spear from Reigns sets up the Rock Bottom and People’s Elbow to give Rock the pin at 44:33(!). Cole: “Cody is screwed.”

Rating: C+. The match was good but e pluribus gads they went way too long. This is a match where you could cut out probably close to twenty minutes without missing much. The first twenty minutes barely had anything going on and then they went into the long heat segment on Rollins. Things picked way up near the end though and they did the right ending, but after a long show with the cold, this match felt WAY longer than it needed to be. What matters though is setting up Cody’s darkest hour as he is up against the wall and might need to assemble the Avengers (perhaps with some outside help) to FINALLY beat Reigns.

The winners celebrate and Cody/Rollins know they’re in trouble.

The big highlight package takes us out.

Overall Rating: B-. This is going to be a show where the experience of watching it live is going to be very different than watching it at home. The cold weather was a major factor in this as I spent most of the show trying to stay warm and that makes the show a lot less fun to watch. As for the show itself, you had a good opener, a heck of an Intercontinental Title match and the big epic main event but the rest of the show was lacking in quality. Only the Usos match was bad (and a lot of that was due to how we got here) but it certainly wasn’t a top level Wrestlemania. Overall, pretty good with some great high points, though it wasn’t able to get over the hump.

Results
Rhea Ripley b. Becky Lynch – Riptide
Austin Theory/Grayson Waller and Awesome Truth won the six way tag team ladder match
Rey Mysterio/Andrade b. Dominik Mysterio/Santos Escobar – Frog splash to Escobar
Jey Uso b. Jimmy Uso – Superfly Splash
Jade Cargill/Bianca Belair/Naomi b. Damage CTRL – Jaded to Kai
Sami Zayn b. Gunther – Helluva Kick
The Rock/Roman Reigns b. Cody Rhodes/Seth Rollins – People’s Elbow to Rhodes

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 




Wrestlemania Count-Up – XXXVII Night Two (2022 Redo): Did They Want Us To Be Mad?

Wrestlemania XXXVII Night Two
Date: April 11, 2021
Location: Raymond James Stadium, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 25,675
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Ashland Craft

It’s the second night of Wrestlemania, because Wrestlemania needs to be a two night show. There are some big things this time too, including Roman Reigns defending the Universal Title against Daniel Bryan and Edge, Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens and MORE TAMINA/NATALYA! Let’s get to it.

Ashland Craft sings America the Beautiful. I’m not sure who she is but I was told she’s the new voice of country and WWE wouldn’t lie to me.

Opening video. It’s the same one as yesterday (albeit with some different clips), making it three airings if you watch all three parts on Peacock.

Here are Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan, this time dressed as pirates, to welcome us to the show. They agree that it’s hot but they both look good so it’s time to hype up the card. A bunch of pirate jokes don’t go very well so Titus switches to hyping up the Fiend vs. Randy Orton. They both say arrrrrgh a lot to wrap it up.

We recap Randy Orton vs. the Fiend. Orton burned the Fiend alive at TLC (because that’s what you do in an inferno match, so Alexa Bliss popped in as the female Fiend to go after Orton and bring back the Fiend, because this story needs to keep going. Fiend looks like even more of a slasher villain now and it’s time for the big showdown.

Randy Orton vs. The Fiend

The burned Fiend walks through the back and transforms into the regular version. Sure why not. LET ME IN flashes above the Titantron and now it’s Alexa Bliss as the female Fiend to the Firefly Funhouse theme. As she gets to ringside, there is a huge jack-in-the-box, with Bliss cranking the handle so the Fiend can pop out. Fiend dives off the box and clotheslines Orton to start. Orton’s neck gets twisted around but the threat of what looked like a Punt from Fiend sends him bailing outside.

Fiend shrugs off the belly to back onto the announcers’ table and puts on the Mandible Claw as they get back in. The hanging DDT connects but it’s too early for the RKO. Instead a charging Fiend is sent into the “box like structure” (oh that’s a famous one), setting up another hanging DDT.

That doesn’t do much again as Fiend hits a clothesline and hammers away, only to miss the backsplash. The RKO is countered into the Mandible Claw, with Fiend switching to load up Sister Abigail. Then fire shoots up from the posts and Bliss, with black goo on her face, is sitting on the box. Fiend reaches out to her and gets RKOed for the pin at 5:52.

Rating: D. I’m not sure if it’s as bad as the bugs on the mat at Wrestlemania XXXIII but this was another really bad idea, as Fiend’s stuff gets so over the top that it makes no sense and it just more dumb than anything else. If you want to do Wyatt vs. Orton then do Wyatt vs. Orton, but stop making it feel like I’ll get my answers if I read three tie-in comic books that come out two years from now.

Post match Orton leaves and the lights go out. Back up and Fiend/Bliss are gone, which, save for a one off appearance tomorrow on Raw, was it for Wyatt in WWE. After this, thank goodness.

Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan are in the back with Eric Bischoff when Bayley interrupts. She shakes Bischoff’s hand and praises his podcast before offering him a spot on Ding Dong Hello. Bischoff says he would like to have Bianca Belair on his podcast, maybe with Sasha Banks. Bayley isn’t impressed and says they’re nothing compared to him. Bischoff and Hogan suddenly remember that they need to look at a boat and Titus goes with them. Titus to Bayley: “Sorry. Hall of Fame stuff.”

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax vs. Tamina/Natalya

Tamina/Natalya are challenging after winning a gauntlet match yesterday. Baszler and Natalya go technical to start and that means an early standoff. Natalya tries a Sharpshooter but Baszler goes straight to the ropes, meaning it’s Jax coming in to shove Natalya down. Jax wants and gets Tamina though, giving us some of the cheering that led to Tamina being more of a thing in 2021.

An exchange of headbutts let them glare at each other so Tamina hammers her up against the ropes. Natalya comes back in with a double backdrop but Baszler comes in off a blind tag. Baszler has to small package her way out of a Sharpshooter attempt so Natalya goes with the release German suplex. Natalya catapults her into a superkick from Tamina (that was nice) but Baszler slips out of a slam. The rights and lefts rock Natalya for a change and a hard knee to the face knocks her silly.

Everything breaks down and Jax slams Tamina on the floor. We settle down to Baszler cranking on Natalya’s knee and you can hear the silence spreading. The stomp on the leg (“gnarly” according to Graves) allows Jax to come back in and lift Natalya up, with Baszler adding a running knee for two. Back up and Jax’s running shoulder hits the post but Tamina is STILL down on the floor. Natalya shouts COME ON YOU GUYS to try and wake the fans up a bit but Jax spinebusters her for two with Tamina making the save.

Tamina comes back in to clean a few rooms until Baszler kicks her legs out. The Kirifuda Clutch is blocked so Tamina goes up, where Baszler kicks her in the head to cut off the Superfly Splash. Everything breaks down and Jax dives off the top to crossbody Natalya and Tamina. The TAMINA chants start up and she plays Lex Luger Jax’s Yokozuna on an awful slam for two.

Tamina misses the Superfly Splash though and they’re both down again as this just keeps going. Natalya, looking close to death, gets the tag and basement drops Jax to (very slowly) set up the Sharpshooter. Granted it doesn’t matter as Baszler made a blind tag and Kirifuda Clutches Natalya to retain the titles at 14:15.

Rating: F. The only word I can think of here is failure, as we are now about fifty minutes into the show and the place was eerily quiet for some parts of this match. To take the second show with fans in over a year and have them go silent less than an hour into the night says that you have accomplished none of your goals. This was long, not good (at one point Tamina messed up A TAG by moving her hand and starting to come in before Natalya had tagged her) and then gave us an anticlimactic ending as the champs retain. Natalya and Tamina would get the belts in about a month anyway, making this all the dumber.

We recap Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens. Zayn has gone off the deep end, suggesting that there is a conspiracy against them because THEY are all out to get him. Owens can’t get behind it but offers to Stun some sense into him. Zayn has Logan Paul here as his guest as Owens continues to think Zayn is nuts. They did a nice job of having Zayn sound completely off his rocker for this and my goodness it’s cool to see Owens vs. Zayn at Wrestlemania.

Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn

JBL is guest commentator and Zayn brings out Logan Paul as his special guest. Zayn charges right at him to start and it’s a Pop Up Powerbomb three seconds in, with Zayn rolling outside. The apron powerbomb is broken up and they head back inside with Owens dropping him ribs first onto the top rope. A running corner clothesline rocks Zayn, who is bumping all over the place for Owens.

The Cannonball connects, allowing JBL to get in the Otto Wanz reference that he makes every time someone uses a Cannonball. They head to the apron and Zayn manages a brainbuster, which is quite the scary spot and comes pretty early in the match. The Michinoku Driver (Cole: “Blue Thunder Bomb!” Graves: “It’s a Michinoku Driver Cole. I’m gonna save you from the internet.”) gives Zayn two and he puts Owens on top. Owens fights out with right hands and the headbutt, setting up the frog splash for two.

A pumphandle driver onto the knee gives Owens two more but Zayn is back up with the exploder suplex into the corner. Another brainbuster gives Zayn another two and he hammers Owens down. They head up top and Owens reverses into the swinging superplex for the double knockdown. Some running clothesline in the corner rock Zayn but he’s right back with the Helluva Kick. Another Helluva Kick is cut off by a superkick, followed by a second one to make Paul cringe. The Stunner gives Owens the clean pin at 9:24.

Rating: B-. It felt like they were just getting in every signature move they could here and that was ok, as this was all about this match making it to the biggest stage in the world. That is something that would have felt like a dream back in the day but here they are. It’s a cool story and they made it work, with the first good match of the night as well.

Post match Paul checks on Zayn, who yells at him due to reasons of insanity. Paul shoves him so Zayn walks away, leaving Paul to raise Owens’ hand. A Stunner abounds.

Riddle is on his scooter in the back and runs into Great Khali. That means a pitch for giant scooters but Khali just stares at him. Rob Van Dam comes in and Riddle is impressed, with Van Dam translating Khali’s words as business advice. Van Dam has his own rolling papers and gives them out before hitting his catchphrase. HOW DO YOU SCREW UP VAN DAM MEETS RIDDLE???

Get vaccinated.

US Title: Sheamus vs. Riddle

Riddle is defending and they’re fighting because Sheamus beat him up with his scooter. They go straight to the brawling with Riddle striking away in the corner. Sheamus powers his way out of a choke and drives Riddle into the corner for some elbows to the face. The swinging release Rock Bottom (which isn’t usually a Sheamus move) gets two but the Irish Curse seems to wake Riddle up.

The armbreaker over the top rope has Sheamus in trouble but he reverses into the forearms to the chest. Back in and Sheamus goes up top, only to get belly to belly superplexed back down for a big crash. Riddle is back up with a Broton into a Jackhammer (Goldberg is not pleased) for two. With that not working, Riddle loads up a slingshot something, which is cut off with a hard knee.

They head to the apron with Riddle grabbing a German suplex. The springboard Floating Bro takes Sheamus down again and Riddle is rolling. Back in and Sheamus has to power out of a triangle choke into a powerbomb for two of his own, with Riddle switching the cover into a rear naked choke. It’s Sheamus going up so Riddle follows him, only to get pulled into White Noise. Middle rope knees give Sheamus two more so Riddle tries a springboard moonsault..which is Brogue Kicked out of the air (nice timing) for the pin and the title at 10:52.

Rating: C+. Time has helped this one a bit as Riddle was about to move on to RKBro, but this was a deflating loss as Riddle hadn’t been champion very long and then lost to Sheamus. The show continues to limit how much good it can do, though at least this one came after a pretty physical match. It isn’t like Sheamus as US Champion is a bad thing, but taking it from Riddle at Wrestlemania? That feels like a Fastlane kind of title match.

We look at Bad Bunny’s debut last night.

We recap Big E. vs. Apollo Crews in a Nigerian Drum Fight for Big E.’s Intercontinental Title. Big E. won the title on Christmas night but Crews turned heel and beat him up, because Big E. as a beaten down champion is the way to go. Then Crews embraced his Nigerian heritage and became little more than a caricature, only to have Big E. beat him at Fastlane. Therefore, we needed a rematch with a bunch of drums because culture.

Intercontinental Title: Big E. vs. Apollo Crews

Hometown boy Big E. is defending in a Nigerian Drum Fight, meaning anything goes and there are a bunch of drums around ringside. As a bonus, Wale raps Big E. to the ring to really make it feel special. Big E. starts fast with a kendo stick but gets a gong knocked out of his hands. Crews is back with some stick shots of his own so Big E. spears him through the ropes to take over.

The steps are set up at ringside, only to have Crews hit a Death Valley Driver onto the apron. That lets Crews lay Big E. onto the steps to try and slam the steps onto him but the steps only hits steps. Big E. is back up with a Rock Bottom off the apron onto the steps but instead of covering, let’s set up a table in the ring. The delay lets Crews hit a kick to the head and beat on him with a kendo stick, only to miss a frog splash through the table. Big E. hits the Big Ending, so here is a monster in a military uniform to come in and beat Big E. down. Crews is laid on top to win the title at 6:50.

Rating: D+. The drums were barely used as this was every other weapons brawl with kendo sticks, a table and the steps. Then the monster comes in to save Crews and win him the title, because Big E., in his hometown and with someone rapping him to the ring, had to lose the title to Apollo Crews here. They couldn’t do this at Smackdown or at Backlash or anything like that, but this show right here under these circumstances. After Riddle lost the US Title in the previous match. Say it with me: because WWE.

We look back at last night’s show, because Wrestlemania needs filler (possible because two of the five matches so far haven’t broken seven minutes). This eats up the better part of five minutes.

Hey! The media LOVED night one!

Get vaccinated!

Hall of Fame video, as this seems to be an intermission without being an intermission. This is the 2021 Class though, as 2020/2021 were inducted in the same year.

Here is the class in the stadium:

Rob Van Dam (nice reaction)
Molly Holly (long overdue)
Great Khali (sure why not)
Ozzy Osbourne (not here)
Eric Bischoff (that’s bizarre)
Rich Hering (longtime WWE employee, Warrior Award)
Kane (the big finale and again, well deserved)

Batista was scheduled to be in but didn’t appear here, as he will be inducted at some point in the future.

We recap Asuka vs. Rhea Ripley for Asuka’s Raw Women’s Title. Bianca Belair went after the Smackdown Women’s Title so Asuka needed a challenger. Game on.

Raw Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Rhea Ripley

Ripley is challenging and gets played to the ring, because this show needs something else to drag it out. After the Big Match Intros, Asuka hits a dropkick to the back and a rollup gets a fast two. Another dropkick into the corner angers Ripley even more, only to have her charge get sent face first into the buckle. They head outside with Asuka’s pop up knee going somewhere in the vicinity of Ripley’s face.

Back in and Asuka hits a hard kick to the back, which is enough to make Ripley take her down and hammer away. The bodyscissors goes on with Ripley hitting her in the back and even messing with the rainbow hair. A series of clotheslines keeps Asuka in trouble but she pulls Ripley down into a kneebar. With that broken up, Ripley sends her into the corner but stops to jaw with some fans. Asuka shoves her off the top though and there’s the missile dropkick to put them both down.

Another trip up top is broken up for Asuka and Ripley drops her face first onto the apron. Asuka is fine enough to catch her with a DDT off the apron and out to the floor, which is good for two because modern wrestling is stupid. Some Kawada kicks wake Ripley up and she grabs the Prism Trap. That’s reversed into an armbar, which is countered with a hard swing into the corner to rock Asuka again. Another armbar goes on but Ripley fights out again. A running kick to the head is quickly countered though and Riptide connects for the pin and the title at 13:37.

Rating: C+. They were having a good, hard hitting match but then that DDT off the apron took me out of it. That was one of the most ridiculous non-finishes I’ve seen in a long time, as there was no reason to have someone be back in the ring within the next month, let alone win the match. Ripley getting the title was a good call in the end, but come up with less infused with dumb way to get there.

Get vaccinated!

We look back at Randy Orton vs. the Fiend, because that needs to be revisited.

Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan thank the fans for watching. Bayley comes out to complain about not getting respect and her lack of pyro. Cue the Bella Twins to get in her face, but Bayley reminds them that John Cena isn’t here tonight. The Bellas beat her up and get booed out of the stadium.

Here’s what’s coming on Peacock.

The next pay per view is Wrestlemania Backlash, because two nights just isn’t enough.

We recap Edge and Daniel Bryan challenging Roman Reigns for the Smackdown World Title. Edge had to retire because of his neck injuries but came back and won the Royal Rumble to earn his title shot. Then Bryan said he wanted to be in the match and made Reigns tap at Fastlane, but the referee didn’t see it. Edge interfered and cost Bryan the match, so let’s make it a triple threat.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns, with Paul Heyman and Jey Uso, is defending and Edge gets a heck of a reaction with probably the loudest pop of the weekend. Bryan gets knocked into the corner to start so Reigns starts unloading on Edge. That’s broken up by Bryan who fires off the European uppercuts, only to be sent outside. Jey adds a superkick and sends Bryan into the steps, leaving us with Edge vs. Reigns for the time being.

It’s time to go outside with the announcers’ table being loaded up but Bryan breaks that up with a suicide dive. Edge takes out Jey and then sends Reigns into the apron and barricade over and over. A posting drops Reigns so Edge heads back to Uso. The Edgecution onto the steps knocks Uso silly so here are the medics to take Uso out. That leaves Edge to roll Bryan up for a pair of near falls back inside but Reigns is back up to fight over a suplex on the apron.

Bryan pulls Reigns to the floor and there’s the missile dropkick to Edge back inside. Reigns is back in to take both of them down, which is enough for him to want some acknowledgment. Edge gets in an Edge-O-Matic on Reigns but he’s right back up with the Superman Punch. The spear is countered into a sunset flip for two as Heyman is getting worried. They both try spears and collide in the middle for a double knockdown. Bryan is back in with a Swan Dive to Reigns for two, followed by the YES Kicks to both.

The big one gets two on Reigns so Bryan grabs the YES Lock, drawing Edge over for the save. That earns Edge a YES Lock of his own but this time it’s Reigns making a save of his own and unloading on Bryan with right hands. They go back outside with Reigns (slowly) powerbombing Bryan through the announcers’ table but taking too long to pose, allowing Edge to spear him off the steps.

Edge sends him back inside and grabs some chairs but switches to the Crossface instead. The piece of the chair makes the Crossface worse but here is Bryan to come in and block the tap. Bryan adds a YES Lock while the Crossface is still on so Edge and Bryan exchange headbutts to break the double hold. That goes to Bryan as well, so he stomps on Edge’s neck, while shouting about how bad it is.

The running knee is loaded up but Edge spears Bryan down and then does the same to Reigns, with Bryan having to pull the referee out at two. With the normal stuff not working, Edge grabs some chairs and unloads on both of them. The Conchairto crushes Bryan but Uso is back in for the save. Reigns is back up and it’s a Conchairto to Edge, setting up the double pin to retain the titles at 22:42.

Rating: A-. This was so far and away the match of both nights that it isn’t even a fair comparison. It felt like a major showdown with Edge and Bryan getting close to being able to make Reigns work hard. The ending might have been a bit cliched with Uso interfering to keep the title, but dang it was fun with some clever spots and a lot of effort throughout. Awesome main event and the big saving grace of a pretty awful night.

The Bloodline poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a show where the wrestling wasn’t the point. The main event was great, but there was so much downtime and so much stuff that felt like it was there to anger the fans rather than make them happy. You have two popular champions lose their titles, whatever that box thing was, and a nearly fifteen minute Natalya/Tamina match. I’m not sure how this was supposed to be a happy show, but it was almost painful to watch at times.

Overall Overall Rating: C+. The first night was a lot better than the first, but this whole thing felt like it would have been better off as a long one off show. It came off like WWE was trying to fill in time far more often than they needed to here and it made the show feel long. Other than the main event and maybe one or two other matches, you could cut off the second night almost entirely. Overall it’s good, if nothing else because they had fans back, but this really needed to be trimmed down.

Ratings Comparison

Randy Orton vs. The Fiend

Original: D
Redo: D

Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax vs. Tamina/Natalya

Original: D
Redo: F

Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens

Original: B-
Redo: B-

Riddle vs. Sheamus

Original: B-
Redo: C+

Apollo Crews vs. Big E.

Original: C+
Redo: D+

Asuka vs. Rhea Ripley

Original: B-
Redo: C+

Edge vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Roman Reigns

Original: A-
Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: B-
Redo: C-

Overall Overall Rating

Original:
Redo: C+

That Women’s Tag Team Title match was a big downgrade and what was I thinking on Crews vs. Big E?

 

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXXV (2020 Edition): It Does Help Things

Wrestlemania XXXV
Date: April 7, 2019
Location: MetLife Stadium, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 82,265
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips
America the Beautiful: Yolanda Adams

We’re back to this show after a year away and I’m not sure what to think about this one. I wasn’t in the stadium for this one and for once that is making me remember the show a little bit better. This whole thing is centered around a few matches, as Wrestlemania always tends to be. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Buddy Murphy vs. Tony Nese

Murphy is defending and this is during Nese’s (who won a tournament to get here) not so great face run. First good thing: there are a bunch of people in their seats already so the place doesn’t look ridiculous. Murphy misses a running knee at the bell so Nese hammers away in the corner and tells the fans that this is his Wrestlemania moment. A cartwheel off the apron lets Nese hit him in the jaw but Murphy grabs a fireman’s carry drop onto the corner (Colt Cabana’s Chicago Skyline) as we take a break.

Back with Murphy holding a chinlock but getting suplexed into the corner to cut things off. Some running elbows to the face rock Murphy and the Lionsault, with Murphy hanging in the ropes, gets two. Nese catches him on the ropes with a palm strike, only to get pulled into a Cheeky Nandos kick. A powerbomb into a spinning faceplant gives Murphy two as we get the “still filing in line” from commentary. Murphy’s Law is countered and Nese hits a reverse hurricanrana to put them both down again.

Murphy wins a strike off but Nese is right back with a sunset driver for his own near fall as the fans are finally getting into this. The running Nese doesn’t get to launch so Nese hits the Fosbury Flop instead. Back in and the 450 gets two in a surprising near fall. The jumping knee connects out of nowhere and Murphy’s Law gets two as Nese gets a foot on the rope. Ever the villain, Murphy tries his own running Nese, which is cut off by a superkick. The real running Nese finishes Murphy at 10:44.

Rating: C. The 205 Live guys had several matches that would blow this one away but at least they had a nice moment in the end with the fans getting into things. Nese as a face didn’t exactly click but beating Murphy felt like a bit deal. It’s a nice mini feel good moment to start what is going to be a long night.

Kickoff Show: Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Zelina Vega, Kairi Sane, Ember Moon, Liv Morgan, Sarah Logan, Ruby Riott, Mandy Rose, Carmella, Maria Kanellis, Asuka, Sonya Deville, Candice LeRae, Naomi, Nikki Cross, Lana, Dana Brooke, Mickie James

Only Naomi and Asuka get entrances. Nikki goes nuts to start and it’s a big brawl, as a battle royal should be. Maria is out in a hurry and Asuka knocks out Candice and Nikki back to back. Ember and Naomi trade hurricanranas until the former hits a quick springboard Eclipse on Lana. Another Eclipse gets rid of Naomi and there’s the real version to Mandy. Ember goes up again but Lana (the one in the designated Captain Marvel attire) shoves her out.

Sane hits an Alabama Slam on Lana and goes up like a schnook, only to get shoved to the apron by Logan. Even the bigger schnook, Logan doesn’t eliminate her but rather joins the rest of the Riott Squad to go after Lana. The elimination doesn’t take long but Sane drops Logan. The Insane Elbow connects, only t have the Squad get together and eliminate Sane without much trouble. An assisted flipping Stunner rocks Vega but AGAIN Logan doesn’t get the elimination.

Instead the Squad goes after Asuka and again they don’t eliminate her. Brooke gets to fight off all three of them and manages a slow motion Thesz press on Morgan. Riott goes after Brooke and gets tossed, with Morgan following her out. Brooke’s handspring elbow hits Vega’s knees though and the running knees in the corner make it worse. Rose and Deville get rid of Vega and Brooke, meaning we can get a big hug.

We’re down to Rose, Deville, Asuka, James, Logan and Carmella, the latter of whom seems to be on the floor because that’s something you have to have in battle royals these days. James hurricanranas Rose to the apron and superkicks her out, only to get dropped by Deville. Asuka beats up Logan and Deville at once but she manages to toss Deville. Logan gets rid of Asuka but, say it with me, Carmella is still in and superkicks Logan out for the win at 10:33.

Rating: D. Holy sweet goodness I can’t stand that finish and yet we seem to get it in every few battle royals (including last year’s women’s battle royal). I know Carmella getting the win is for the sake of the New York fans but egads this feels like a waste of a match, which tends to be the case with so many of these pre-show battle royals. In other words: more of the same stuff that wasn’t good in the first place.

Kickoff Show: Raw Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Revival is defending and picked the match because they thought it would be an easy win. See, Hawkins hasn’t won a match in two and a half years so of course he gets a Wrestlemania title shot (you have to keep the New York crowd happy you see). Dawson shoves Hawkins down to start and then pats him on the cheek in the corner. We get a recap of the Edgeheads as Dawson headlocks Hawkins down.

Ryder comes in as we hear about how the show in “the shadow of New York”, which is acknowledged as New Jersey, likely for one of the only times tonight. A middle rope missile dropkick puts Wilder down but Dawson low bridges him out to the floor. Something close to a top rope Demolition Decapitator gets two and the armbar goes on. Dawson comes back in and rips at the face before working on his own armbar.

That’s enough of that so Wilder grabs another armbar (he’s up 2-1 on Dawson) to keep Ryder down. Ryder fights up again but neckbreakers his way out of a double suplex. With Hawkins being distracted, the champs cheat to set up a hard clothesline for two more. The assisted legdrop gives Wilder two and we hit the chinlock as this keeps going. Ryder finally suplexes his way to freedom and there’s the hot tag to Hawkins.

House is cleaned until it’s a double clothesline to put Hawkins and Dawson down at the same time. The middle rope Rough Ryder hits Dawson but Ryder and Wilder crash out to the floor. Wilder saves Dawson at two and tornado DDTs Ryder on the floor. A brainbuster drops Hawkins outside as well and they’re all down for a bit. Back in and Hawkins is dead but manages a small package for the pin and the titles at 13:20. Hawkins slowly realizing that not only is the match over but that they won is kind of awesome.

Rating: D+. This went on too long but the ending was fine after setting everything up for so long with the losing streak. Hawkins and Ryder are a likable team so it’s not like them winning the titles is a bad idea. Besides, WWE has already taken away anything that the Revival could offer (and yet it would still get worse) so the loss doesn’t do a ton of damage to them anyway.

Kickoff Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Otis, Karl Anderson, Andrade, Gran Metalik, Chad Gable, Heath Slater, Bo Dallas, Colin Jost Jeff Hardy, No Way Jose, Lince Dorado, Bobby Roode, Konnor, Tyler Breeze, Viktor, Luke Harper, Ali, Apollo Crews, Michael Che, Titus O’Neil, Tucker, Braun Strowman, Shelton Benjamin, Jinder Mahal, Matt Hardy, Curtis Axel, Rhyno, Luke Gallows, EC3, Kalisto

So the big deal here is Jost and Che are from Saturday Night Live and Strowman doesn’t like them. The two of them bail to the floor and hide under the ring as Axel is out in about ten seconds. Dorado takes a SCARY bump to the floor with Breeze, EC3 and Benjamin following him out. There goes Dallas as well but it’s time for a staredown with Strowman and Harper.

That’s broken up in a hurry and Titus gets rid of Slater. As expected, Titus is out a few seconds later off a missed charge and Ali gets rid of Jose. Ascension sends Strowman shoulder first into the post for a crash to the floor (through the ropes so no elimination). Anderson isn’t so lucky as he gets tossed and the Hardys do the same to Rhyno. Roode and Metalik are out next as the ring is starting to empty a bit.

Andrade tosses Kalisto onto Metalik but Gable rolls Andrade with German suplexes. Since it’s Gable though, Andrade throws him out in a hurry, leaving Otis to hit a double Caterpillar on the Ascension. They’re both out as well but Strowman is back in to get rid of Gallows, Tucker and Otis in a row. There goes Mahal as Harper tries to suplex Ali over the top. With Ali hanging upside down, Strowman kicks Harper out, nearly dropping Ali on his head in a very near miss.

We’re down to Strowman, Andrade, Matt, Jeff and Crews in the ring with Che and Jost still underneath the ring. Andrade and Crews go to the apron and Andrade tries a hurricanrana for no intelligent reason in a double elimination. Strowman puts the Hardys on the apron in the battle of North Carolina as Che and Jost get back inside. They can’t get rid of Strowman, who dumps the Hardys and is ready for the destruction.

Jost grabs a mic though and says this doesn’t need to end in violence. He presents his personal therapist, whose breathing exercises earn him a chokeslam. Che tries to eliminate himself but Strowman punches himself out instead. Strowman misses a charge and almost gets eliminated but powers through it and tosses Jost for the win at 10:27.

Rating: D+. Yeah it’s stupid and the SNL guys added nothing to the whole thing but Strowman won in the end and there were some nice spots (granted they went with some scary ones) throughout. It isn’t anything better or worse than your usual “get them all in there” battle royal and it could have been worse. That’s high praise for something like this anymore.

And with that Smackdown length Kickoff Show out of the way, we can get on with the real show. Isn’t modern WWE great?

Yolanda Adams sings America the Beautiful and we get the big helicopter flyover.

The opening video, complete with a WWE Presents, features the wrestlers talking about how Shakespeare said all the world’s a stage. Tonight, this is their stage and they are the players. We get the classic moments of course because this show is built around history. They do a good job of starting this slowly and then building it up into a big feeling. As usual, WWE’s promo videos are nothing short of incredible and somehow they manage to get better a lot of the time. That being said, wrestlers calling themselves storytellers doesn’t sound right.

Maybe it’s how many times I’ve heard the song on highlight packages since then, but that Love Runs Out theme song is really catchy.

Here’s Alexa Bliss, the host for the evening, to open things up. Bliss talks about how this show needs a goddess and if she snaps her fingers, she can make a Wrestlemania moment. A snap of her fingers produces Hulk Hogan, who is happy to be back here in the Silverdome. That gets a chuckle so then he calls it the MetLife Center in a joke that doesn’t go over as well. Hogan and Bliss pose together in a cute moment.

Hold on though as Paul Heyman storms out and says we’re doing the Universal Title match RIGHT NOW. The faster Lesnar wins, the faster he can go to Las Vegas where he is ULTIMATELY appreciated.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins is defending after winning the Royal Rumble and gets a big BEAST SLAYER intro. At least BURN IT DOWN gets a big reaction so they’re doing something right. Lesnar jumps him before the bell and knees Rollins off the apron. An F5 plants Rollins on the floor and a hard whip into the barricade makes it even worse. Rollins gets tossed over the announcers’ table as the beating is on in a big way. That’s not enough for Lesnar so he throws Rollins over another table before throwing Rollins inside.

Heyman and Lesnar talk the angry trash but it’s back to the floor before the opening bell. Cole: “Seth Rollins never had a chance!” And there’s your usual WWE line that gives away the ending. Brock throws Rollins over the announcers’ table for a third time and then through the cover of the announcers’ table. They go back in for the opening bell and there’s the first German suplex. Lesnar: “SUPLEX CITY B******!” Give him his t-shirt money.

The second suplex sends him flying again as Cole brings up the Wrestlemania XXXI cash-in. The F5 is countered though and Rollins gets in a low blow. That means a low superkick and three straight Stomps make Rollins champion at 2:30. It was an exciting start and the whole thing from Lesnar’s first attack ran about 7:00. They had to get the title onto Rollins here (though more importantly off of Lesnar) and this was certainly a memorable way to do it. Certainly more so than when they did it again in a longer form four and a half months later.

AJ Styles vs. Randy Orton

This is your “here are two big names without much else to do” match. Orton eliminated him from the Elimination Chamber and they got in an argument about who built Smackdown. Orton’s big CGI snakes really don’t look great but those things are hit and miss for everyone. AJ headlocks him to start and is promptly driven into the corner. A very early threat of an RKO sends AJ bailing to the corner and it’s another standoff.

Orton pokes him in the eye and hits a dropkick to take over, including a boot across the eye to make it even worse. AJ gets in his own dropkick though as they’re pretty even in the early minutes. With Orton taking a breather on the floor, AJ scores with the slingshot forearm, only to get knocked off the apron and hard into the barricade. Back in and the chinlock goes on as the fans start chanting something I can’t understand.

That’s broken up so AJ hits the sliding forearm, setting up the fireman’s carry backbreaker for two. An early Styles Clash attempt is countered into a powerslam to give Orton his own near fall as the slow pace continues. The Calf Crusher attempt is countered without much trouble but the second attempt is slapped on in the middle of the ring. Not that the fans are exactly interested but AJ did get it on. That’s broken up in a hurry so AJ heads to the apron for the Phenomenal Forearm.

Orton jumps up to RKO him out of the air (as he had done last week) but AJ holds back, leaving Orton to crash. The springboard 450 gets two but Orton is right back with the backbreaker. Orton’s rather good looking top rope superplex has AJ crashing down for two and an uppercut gets a crazy loud pop (that had to be for something else). The hanging DDT gets no reaction but Orton walking around does, as I’m almost scared to imagine what had the fans’ attention.

AJ hits an enziguri to block the RKO, only to walk into it on the second attempt. That’s only good for two as well and Orton is shocked. With nothing else working, Orton loads up a super RKO, which is escaped without a lot of effort. A Pele sends Orton to the floor and the Phenomenal Forearm knock him even sillier. Back in and Orton still can’t hit the RKO, meaning it’s another Phenomenal Forearm to give AJ the pin at 16:12.

Rating: C-. Things got a bit better by the end but it never got going at any intense level. These two are capable of a lot but it was rather slow paced for the most part and when the match is going that long, it can get pretty tiresome in a hurry. It’s not bad in any sense but it wasn’t exciting and you know these two could do a lot better. That makes it more frustrating than anything else, as I kept waiting for them to get going and they never really did.

Here’s Lacey Evans to continue doing her thing of walking around, smiling, and then walking back.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Rusev/Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Bar vs. Ricochet/Aleister Black

The Usos are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. There is something so awesome about seeing the look on Ricochet’s face as he walks onto the stage. You can see what it means to him and there is no faking that kind of a feeling. This also marks Ricochet and Black’s third shot at different titles this week, after Raw and NXT title shots earlier in the week. Jimmy and Black start things off with a feeling out process until Sheamus tags himself in to face Black.

The armbar doesn’t last long as Rusev tags Sheamus and runs Black over. Nakamura comes in for a kick to the back but the rapid fire tags continue, with Jimmy coming in to Samoa drop Black. Nakamura kicks Jimmy into a tag to Ricochet, who does a very spinny headscissors on Cesaro. Since it’s just a headscissors though, Cesaro uppercuts Ricochet down and starts swinging him, as Sheamus forearms everyone else.

After a nearly 40 second swing (geez), the Sharpshooter goes on in the middle of the ring. Black makes the save and strikes away, setting up a springboard moonsault for two on Rusev. Nakamura is back in with some running knees to Black, meaning Ricochet has to make a save of his own. That earns him a swinging Rock Bottom from Rusev and it’s time for the nine man Tower of Doom. Just to show off, Ricochet flips out and lands safely in the corner, setting up the 630 for two on Sheamus. We hit the parade of kicks to the face with the Usos superkicking Sheamus down. The Double Us retains the titles at 10:05.

Rating: B. This was almost all action from bell to bell and that’s all you can do with a match like this one. Let them do whatever they want and get in spot after spot for a little while. They didn’t overstay their welcome either, as this match got in the right amount of time. Good stuff here and one of the more entertaining things all night so far.

Hall of Fame recap. Thankfully Bret being attacked isn’t mentioned whatsoever.

Here’s the class being presented in the stadium:

Honky Tonk Man (How was he not in yet?)

Harlem Heat (Perfectly fine.)

Torrie Wilson (The new low benchmark.)

Brutus Beefcake (Again, how was he not in yet?)

Hart Foundation (Should have been earlier so Neidhart could be there but long overdue as well.)

Sue Aitchison (Warrior Award.)

D-Generation X (I’m sure they had to twist their arms to get here. Deserved of course.)

We recap Miz vs. Shane McMahon. Somehow Shane won the World Cup despite not being in the tournament and Miz, the man he replaced in the finals, was jealous. Miz’s dad thought they should team together so they won the Tag Team Titles. The reign didn’t last long though and they split up, with Shane turning on Miz. Tonight, it’s Falls Count Anywhere. This was in the middle of Shane’s RIDICULOUS run near the top of Smackdown where he was all over the show and beating main eventers, including that Tag Team Title win. Of course he gets a big Wrestlemania match, because that’s what makes sense for such a star.

Shane McMahon vs. The Miz

Falls Count Anywhere, but hang on as Shane needs to hear his introduction three times in a row. With that out of the way, Shane bails to the floor at the bell so the chase is on, with Shane hitting his horrible punches. In a smart move, Shane grabs Miz’s dad (in the front row) and again, the chase goes badly for Miz as Shane hammers away. They head outside again with Shane loading up the announcers’ table.

A monitor shot to the head puts Miz on the table but Miz’s dad blocks the big elbow. Shane gets down so Miz’s dad gets inside for the showdown, with Miz’s dad doing the pose that launched a subplot on the upcoming season of Miz and Mrs. Shane takes him into the corner and stomps away, drawing Miz back in for the beating. They fight to to the floor with Shane falling over the barricade but hold on as Miz wants someone to check on his dad.

With the medics doing their job, Miz dives over the barricade to take Shane down again. They fight over towards one of the big pillars that holds up the canopy over the ring but Shane fights out of the Skull Crushing Finale. Instead Shane grabs a DDT for two but Miz kicks him down off the stage. Shane is sent knee first into a barricade and Miz beats on him with a chair to blow off some more steam.

They wreck announcers’ row with Miz throwing him over every chair he can find, plus throwing some chairs around. Shane gets sent through a table for two, followed by a monitor shot to knock him over a barricade and onto the top of a well placed golf cart. That gives Miz a delayed two so he punches Shane up towards a production tower. A Skull Crushing Finale onto the platform gets two, because he’s Shane and Miz is just a former World Champion.

Shane fights back (of course) and climbs up to the top of the tower. Miz pursues so Shane begs off, even dropping to one knee. That earns him some left hands to the head and Miz superplexes him all the way down (after asking if Shane is ready) onto a crash pad. Worry not though as Shane lands on top for the pin at 15:25.

Rating: D-. I knew the ending was coming here and I still shake my head at the ending. Shane is the boss’ son but my goodness how hard can you push him? The worst part is that it is only going to get worse as the summer goes on, but this was a punch to the gut as Shane wins AGAIN, meaning he isn’t going away anytime soon. The superplex was a nice idea but showing the landing on the pad (which just happened to be there) took away all of the impact that it had. That is, whatever was left before Shane won of course.

Paige joins commentary.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: IIconics vs. Beth Phoenix/Natalya vs. Nia Jax/Tamina vs. Sasha Banks/Bayley

Banks and Bayley are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Bret Hart is here with Beth and Natalya (who really feel like fill ins for Trish Stratus/Lita), though he doesn’t go beyond the stage. Tamina shoves Bayley down to start and superkicks Natalya for a bonus. Everything breaks down in a hurry with Nia being sent outside for a ram into the steps. Back in and Peyton rolls Sasha up for two and it’s a double kick to put drop Sasha again.

The Hardys’ Spin Cycle gets two on Banks but she’s right back with a backslide for the same. It’s back to Bayley for a sliding clothesline for two on Beth but Billie tags herself in. The IIconics take over on Beth, who is right back with a suplex to both of them at once. Natalya comes in for two but Bayley makes a fast save. The champs get in a fight with Beth and Natalya and it’s a Bank Statement to Phoenix. That’s broken up but the Glam Slam is countered into a rollup into the corner.

Natalya drops Sasha onto Bayley and they get the always fairly dumb looking double Sharpshooter treatment. This time it’s Tamina making the save and Nia comes back in to wreck everyone else. The IIconics get crushed with stereo Samoan drops but Beth shoves Nia off the top to break up a splash. Sasha takes Beth down as well and Bayley drops the top rope elbow, followed by Banks’ frog splash. The Tower of Doom is broken up so Beth hits a super Glam Slam on Bayley, with Kay making a blind tag. With Beth sent outside, Kay steals the pin and the titles at 10:47.

Rating: D. This went on too long and wasn’t all that interesting in the first place. The titles were brand new at this point and they already seemed pretty worthless, which would be proven over the next year. The fallout here is more interesting than the match itself, as you Nia would go away for about a year with double ACL surgery and Sasha (allegedly) threw a fit over losing and took the summer off.

The pilots from the Kickoff Show flyover are in the crowd. That’s always cool.

We recap Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan for the Smackdown World Title. Kofi replaced the injured Ali in the Elimination Chamber and got down to the final two. That set up one of the most dramatic things that WWE has ever done, as Kofi got inches away from winning the title and the fans ate it up. It was clear that Kofi had to get the title at Wrestlemania or he never would, which sent Kofi and New Day into a crusade to finally get the title shot that had eluded him for eleven years.

After jumping through all kinds of hoops set by Vince McMahon, it took New Day winning a gauntlet match to get the shot, with their longtime rivals the Usos stepping aside in a great show of respect for Kofi. At the same time, Bryan said that Kofi was a B+ player in an awesome role reversal from his legendary run five years earlier.

The match was finally set and it was a heck of a story, as Kofi had put in so many years of building credibility to get here and was finally cashing in. This wasn’t JBL jumping up to the main event scene, as Kofi had pretty much won every title other than the World Title. That’s not a big jump, but it was hard to believe that they would actually pull the trigger here. In other words, this was EXCELLENT and would have headlined any other year.

Smackdown World Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan

Kofi is challenging and has New Day in his corner, while Bryan has Rowan. Big E. has a gift for Kofi and promises it for after the match. I had forgotten how nice of a touch Bryan’s eco-friendly belt really was. They stare each other down to start and the fans are behind Kofi, which is almost hard to fathom until you realize that Bryan might be a better heel than face. Kofi’s headlock doesn’t get anywhere so they fight over a backslide. Bryan monkey flips him so Kofi lands on his feet, setting up a dropkick to the floor.

The big dive takes Bryan down again and the roster is behind Kofi in the back. Things slow down a bit as Bryan needs a breather with Rowan. Back in and Bryan uppercuts him a few times to set up the surfboard, which always looks awesome. That’s broken up in a hurry as usual, allowing Kofi to kick away in the corner. Bryan’s moonsault into the running clothesline is countered into something resembling the standing double stomp (almost a Thesz press as Kofi can’t hit it properly) for two.

Kofi’s jumping clothesline works a bit better and the Boom Drop connects. Bryan heads outside again so Kofi tries a springboard dive, which lands ribs first on the announcers’ table. You don’t have to ask Bryan twice to go after the ribs like that so he drops Kofi ribs first across the top rope. The ribs get sent into the corner and it’s off to a waistlock, which works a lot better this time around. Kofi fights up and elbows in the corner but a very quick Trouble in Paradise is countered into a Boston crab.

Bryan’s belly to back superplex is broken up with elbows to the face and Kofi hits a top rope splash to the back for two. They slug it out but Trouble in Paradise is countered again, only to countered into a small package to give Kofi two more. Kofi’s crossbody is rolled through though and Bryan pulls him into a failed LeBell Lock attempt so they’re both down for a second. The running knee is countered into the SOS but Bryan reverses into the LeBell Lock, with Bryan letting go for some more elbows to the ribs.

Kofi finally gets his foot on the rope and you can hear the sigh of relief. Bryan YES Kicks at the ribs even more but Kofi fires up and tells Bryan to kick him even harder. As Bryan backs away, Kofi throws his own kicks and busts out a reverse suplex for two. They head outside again so Rowan can go after New Day, earning himself Trouble in Paradise. The Midnight Hour on the floor takes care of Rowan and Kofi blocks Bryan’s suicide dive.

Back in and Bryan hits the running knee…..for two and a big pop on the kickout. Bryan has had it and unloads with stomps to the head to set up the LeBell Lock. Kofi breaks out again and blasts Bryan with forearms to the face with more aggression than you usually see from him. Bryan won’t let go of the wrist so Kofi stomps him right back, knocking Bryan silly. Trouble in Paradise gives Kofi the clean pin and the title at 23:45.

Rating: A. That is the definition of the Wrestlemania moment and it holds up to perfection a year later. The fans completely bought into the idea of Kofi fighting through everything and winning the title in the end and that’s all it should have been. Kofi is the kind of guy who has been around forever and built up so much good will that when he finally went after the title, everyone was on his side. That made for a special moment and it was amazing throughout as it’s something that I never thought I would see, but here it is. That’s a great thing to see as rare as it can be.

On top of that, this was an awesome match with both guys giving it everything they had. The story here was perfect with Kofi not being the wrestler Bryan was but knowing that this was his one shot and giving everything he had to achieve his dream when he could. The fans believed in him and there was no way he could lose in this spot. Outstanding stuff and if not for the historic main event, this would have headlined in a landslide. Watch this again and smile a lot.

Post match Woods and Big E. pull out the classic WWE Championship and hand it to Kofi for the first time (Kofi kneeling in the ring and waiting to have it presented to him is a great visual). The pyro goes off and Kofi’s sons get in the ring to celebrate with him and one of them holds up the title, which is almost bigger than he is. We’re not done yet though as Big E. brings in the present from earlier. It’s the first New Day shirt featuring Kofi as champion and his kids get to hold them up for a perfect visual. Woods: “THEY SAID WE COULDN’T MAKE IT! WE MADE IT TO THE TOP!” Outstanding.

Che and Jost are banged up so Bliss introduces them to Dr. Scott Hall and Dr. Kevin Nash. Ok then.

Booker T. is the next guest commentator.

US Title: Samoa Joe vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is challenging and this year’s comic gear is…..well Mysterio appropriately enough. Now how did he never do that one before? Joe kicks him in the face but Rey is right back with the springboard hurricanrana. The 619 connects but Joe pulls him out of the air into the Koquina Clutch and Rey is out at 1:00, which may have something to do with Rey injuring his ankle on Monday. Booker being annoyed at wasting all the time on prep work is good for a chuckle.

Sneak peak of Batista’s new movie Stuber.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre. Reigns returned from leukemia after a four month absence and he needs a first victim. Drew has run through the rest of the Shield as a bonus. This is your likely layup result of the show and that’s fine.

Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre

Drew gets played to the ring by the New York Bagpipe Band. They trade shots to the face to start so Reigns snaps off a Samoan drop for an early two. McIntyre is right back with a spinebuster into a jackknife cover for two of his own. The Glasgow Kiss knocks Reigns down again and McIntyre throws him into the corner for two. The chinlock/armbar goes on until Reigns powers out and knocks him to the floor. Reigns’ running kick to the face is blocked though and McIntyre suplexes him down.

Back in and the reverse Alabama slam gives McIntyre two so he takes Reigns up top. That earns him a crotching, only to have Drew pull himself up from the Tree of Woe to send Reigns flying with a belly to belly superplex. Reasons of general heelishness cause McIntyre to slap him in the face, meaning the comeback is on. McIntyre gets knocked outside again for the Samoan drop on the floor, followed by the Superman Punch back inside. The spear finishes McIntyre at 10:06.

Rating: D. The fans didn’t care and why should they have? As usual, it was clear that Reigns was going to win and that happens far too often at Wrestlemania. It’s amazing that Reigns got to come back here but it’s Reigns, who almost always wins, winning again in a match where the ending was obvious throughout. Nothing to see here, and the fans were silent throughout.

Post match Reigns gets to pose in a rather emotional moment.

Here’s Elias for his self described greatest performance ever. He’s on screen playing drums, with a second Elias joining him on piano and the real thing in the ring playing guitar. They jam for a bit and guitar Elias says the other two deserve a standing ovation. Elias teases more members of the band and gets in his catchphrase before loading up the song….but here’s a SPECIAL BULLETIN on Babe Ruth calling his shot in the 1932 World Series.

Cue John Cena in Dr. of Thuganomics gear and the fans seem rather pleased. Cena raps about how he’s about to turn heel and how bad his own movies are. WWE doesn’t stand for Walk With Elias because it really means Wasted Wrestling Experiment. We get a nuts joke, followed by the FU to leave Elias laying. They have history together so this was as good as you were going to get. This was funny for a change if nothing else and that’s a cool Wrestlemania feeling.

We recap Batista vs. HHH. Back at Smackdown 1000, Batista had mentioned that HHH never beat him but laughed it off. Then in February, Ric Flair was having a 70th birthday celebration but Batista attacked him, while asking HHH if he had his attention. This set up the match, with Batista demanding that HHH give him what he wanted (over and over and over). HHH has put up his career just in case the ending was in the slightest bit of doubt.

Shawn Michaels is guest commentator.

Batista vs. HHH

No holds barred with HHH’s career on the line. Batista goes out to glare at Shawn but here’s HHH, riding in a Mad Max style cart because of course he is. Batista drives him straight into the corner to start so HHH is back with some right hands to the face. A backdrop sends Batista outside but he throws HHH over the announcers’ table in a crash. HHH is right back up with a ram into the barricade and busts out a chain to whip Batista over the back.

The chain is pulled into Batista’s mouth (Shawn: “That’s not going to help his movie career.”) and HHH whips him into the steps. To ramp up the pain, HHH busts out some pliers to bend Batista’s fingers around a bit. HHH isn’t done with the toolbox so he grabs some needle nose pliers and ribs Batista’s nose ring out. To be fair, that thing looked horrible. Cole: “HHH just ripped a nose ring out of the nose of Batista.” So the nose ring in his ear is still intact.

Batista’s nose is good enough to drop HHH onto the announcers’ table and then he does it again onto a different one. A chair to the back sets up the shoulders in the corner for two as things have slowed way down. Batista slams him down for two more and let’s go outside again. The steps are set on the table and another table is cleared off as this is taking quite a long time for one big spot.

The huge Batista Bomb through the table is countered with a backdrop onto (not through) the other table and they’re both down again. HHH gets up, spinebusters him through the table, and we get another breather. HHH pulls out the sledgehammer but it’s a spear to cut him down for two. This time it’s HHH knocking the sledgehammer away from Batista, earning himself a spinebuster in the process. The Batista Bomb, which makes HHH drop the sledgehammer again, connects for two.

With nothing else working, Batista brings in the steps but goes up top for some reason. That reason would be so HHH can powerbomb him onto the steps, setting up a Pedigree for two (Because this MUST KEEP GOING!). They’re both down again so here’s Flair to slip HHH the sledgehammer. HHH gets up and uses the steps as a launchpad to hammer Batista in the head. Since that’s not enough to pin him (or KILL HIM as it probably should have), Batista pops up to take the Pedigree for the pin at 25:45.

Rating: D. Why does HHH do this? They could have had the same match with at least ten minutes chopped off but for some reason we needed to get HHH’s latest big epic match, no matter how much people aren’t interested in seeing it. This was terrible with Batista looking like a shell of his glory days (fair enough) and the match going WAY longer than it should have. Horrible match, and did you expect anything else given this style of match’s history?

The B Team model Daniel Bryan WWE Champion shirts but here’s Ron Simmons for the joke.

JBL is your next guest commentator.

Baron Corbin vs. Kurt Angle

This is Angle’s retirement match as he can barely get in the ring without injuring himself these days and needs to limp away for good. Corbin is here because we all did something horrible in a past life. Angle goes after him to start but gets knocked into the corner to put him in early trouble. Corbin takes it to the corner and pounds away before mocking Angle’s family a bit. A missed middle rope ax handle sends Corbin throat first into the rope so Angle snaps off some suplexes for two.

Angle walks into a big boot but is fine enough to grab a quickly broken ankle lock. Deep Six gives Corbin two more but he misses a charge, allowing the Angle Slam to connect for two. The straps come down and the ankle lock goes on until Corbin rolls him into the corner for the break. Corbin throws in a You Can’t See Me so Angle punches him into more rolling German suplexes. The moonsault misses though and the End of Days finishes Kurt’s career at 5:59.

Rating: D. Angle does seem fine with putting Corbin over on the way out but this was another step in the seemingly eternal nonsense that was/is the Corbin push. It’s a lot to take and while I can live with Angle going out on his back, it’s a lot to take because Corbin really is going way above his pay grade every time he’s in a match like this.

Post match Angle thanks the fans and asks for one more YOU SUCK chant for the road.

Intercontinental Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Finn Balor

Lashley, with Lio Rush, is defending and they’ve traded the title, so tonight it’s the Demon to make the match feel big. Balor gets a special entrance by coming down off a raised platform, though it’s not as creepy as his NXT entrances. Lashley has very bright green contacts in for some reason. Some early dropkicks put Lashley on the floor and Balor takes him out with a dive for a bonus.

A hard drive into the apron cuts Balor off though and there’s a suplex to make it worse. Lashley clotheslines him hard to the floor but a Sling Blade gets Balor out of trouble. Rush’s distraction lets Lashley hit a HARD spear through the ropes though and a regular one gets two back inside. Balor fights out of a powerbomb and hits one of his own, setting up the Coup de Grace for the pin and the title at 4:01.

Rating: C. The match was entertaining enough for something that was going so fast but at the same time, the booking still doesn’t make a ton of sense. Balor has already shown that he can beat Lashley so now he needs to bring up the powers to win? And the extraordinary thing was just a powerbomb? I’m glad to see the Demon again but this wasn’t exactly the most logical thing in the world.

Here’s Alexa Bliss to announce the attendance record of 82,265. Cue R-Truth and Carmella for the Wrestlemania Dance Break (Remember those?).

We recap the main event of Raw Women’s Champion Ronda Rousey and Smackdown Women’s Champion Charlotte defending against Becky Lynch in a winner take all match. Rousey is the unstoppable force, Charlotte is Charlotte and Becky is here because she’s the hottest name in wrestling at the moment and won the Royal Rumble. Tonight the winner leaves with both titles and it’s the biggest women’s match in history.

Raw Women’s Title/Smackdown Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch

Lynch is challenging both. In a nod to her father and the Four Horsemen, Charlotte lance in a helicopter outside and walks into the stadium. Already inside, Joan Jett and the Blackhearts play Rousey to the ring. There is something so cool about watching Becky walk down the ramp in a wide shot as Cole talks about how she has started a movement. I’m not sure if that is the right term but it looked awesome. The bell rings and even a year later I still can’t believe this happened. The women’s division was a joke just a few years ago and now it’s the biggest match of the year. That’s hard to believe and it’s very cool.

They stare at each other for a good bit to start until Becky goes after Rousey’s arm. Rousey kicks her to the floor without much trouble and that means a Samoan drop into the barricade. Charlotte follows and takes Piper’s Pit but pops right back up for a fall away slam to send Rousey into the barricade for a change. That sets up the required Charlotte vs. Becky fight with Becky getting the better of things but can’t get the Figure Four, allowing Rousey to come and hammer away.

Charlotte breaks up an armbar attempt but gets pulled into a triangle choke over the ropes. Becky hits a running dropkick though and Rousey falls HARD onto the floor in a nasty crash. That leaves Charlotte to knee Becky in the head as the fans get behind Becky in a big way. Charlotte’s moonsault hits knees and Becky gets the Disarm-Her but Rousey make the save in a hurry. A double Natural Selection gives Charlotte two each and it’s Becky going outside this time.

For some reason Charlotte tries to slug it out with Rousey, earning herself a knee to the head. Charlotte pulls her into a Boston crab, drawing Becky in for her own save. Becky and Charlotte slug it out again until Charlotte is sent to the apron. Charlotte gets caught up top with a super Bexploder for two but Rousey drops both of them with a high crossbody for a double near fall. The double armbar goes on so Becky and Charlotte powerbomb her for the break. It took three attempts but they finally got out.

Everyone is down for a bit until Becky hits a Rock Bottom for two on Charlotte. Rousey goes after Becky and gets pulled straight into the Disarm-Her so she uses the ropes to power up in the corner. That’s fine with Becky, who puts it on again in the corner until Charlotte boots her in the face. Charlotte’s super Spanish Fly gets two but she might have banged up her knee. Rousey’s knee is banged up as well so Charlotte stomps away and grabs the Figure Four around the post.

After sending Becky into the barricade, Charlotte grabs the Figure Eight but Becky dives in off the top for another save. Just because, let’s bring in a table but Charlotte decks Becky for taking too long to set it up. Rousey shoves Charlotte off the top and turns the table over because she doesn’t need it. A double spear takes down Becky and Rousey so Charlotte sets up the table in the corner.

Charlotte sends Rousey face first into the table and spears Becky for two more. Back up and Charlotte gets hiptossed through the table, leaving Becky and Rousey to have the slugout we’ve been waiting for. They throw some serious hands but Piper’s Pit is countered into a crucifix (with Rousey’s shoulder a good six inches off the mat in a bad botch) to give Becky both titles at 21:28.

Rating: B. I don’t know if it’s because I didn’t watch it in one sitting this time around but I liked the match a good bit better on a second viewing. These three beat each other up and while Becky winning was the presumed finish, it wasn’t entirely a lock given who she was in there against. It was a heck of a fight and the three of them all came out looking great. This is much more historic than good, but it’s really rather good and that’s always a positive way to go out.

Rousey is ticked as Becky celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The positives are better than the negatives but not by much. There are some flat out bad matches on here but they are overcome by some great feelings with the faces winning all of the big matches for a change. That felt like an old school style as for the first time in what felt like forever, they didn’t cut the fans off for the sake of dragging things out until later. For once it felt like a season finale and that’s what Wrestlemania should be when it gets the chance. Good show, but it could have been a lot better.

How you ask? CUT THE SHOW DOWN! Look at how long this show is and tell me that it’s well put together. There is no need for a sixteen match card, especially with some of the matches that feel tacked on. All three Tag Team Title matches feel like they’re here for the sake of being here and some of the matches just need to be shortened. Either that or find a way to get people to the ring faster. I know it seems simple but how much of these shows are spent on ring entrances alone? Just find a way to shorten things, please.

Overall there are more good things than bad, but this isn’t a show that you need to watch in one sitting. As soon as you get to the point where the show is five hours plus an episode of Smackdown before it starts (and a Smackdown with more wrestling than usual at that), you’re hitting a firm ceiling of how much you can enjoy this. I know you can’t cut out big chunks, but find a way to get this under six hours. Do that and it’s a lot better, but that has been the case for years now and it keeps getting longer. Either way, at least we had enough nice stuff on here, but don’t watch it all at once.

Ratings Comparison

Tony Nese vs. Buddy Murphy

Original: C+

Redo: C

Women’s Battle Royal

Original: D

Redo: D

Revival vs. Zack Ryder/Curt Hawkins

Original: C

Redo: D+

Men’s Battle Royal

Original: D

Redo: D+

Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

AJ Styles vs. Randy Orton

Original: B-

Redo: C-

Usos vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Rusev vs. The Bar vs. Aleister Black/Ricochet

Original: C+

Redo: B

Shane McMahon vs. The Miz

Original: C-

Redo: D-

Boss N Hug Connection vs. Natalya/Beth Phoenix vs. IIconics vs. Nia Jax/Tamina

Original: D

Redo: D

Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: A-

Redo: A

Samoa Joe vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Drew McIntyre vs. Roman Reigns

Original: C-

Redo: D

Batista vs. HHH

Original: D+

Redo: D

Baron Corbin vs. Kurt Angle

Original: F

Redo: D

Finn Balor vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: C

Redo: C

Ronda Rousey vs. Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C+

About the same all around, but some of those earlier ones are a good bit off. Still though, too long, despite some of the very good parts.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/04/08/wrestlemania-xxxv-so-much-for-no-happy-endings/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXXIV (2019 Edition): Last Year’s Prototype

Wrestlemania XXXIV
Date: April 8, 2018
Location: Mercedes-Benz Superdome, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 78,133
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Chloe x Hallie

I’m not sure if it’s because I was in the stadium last year or something else, but this show was actually a bit more memorable than the previous few editions. Hopefully it’s just as good watching it back but you never can tell with these things. Brock Lesnar is defending the Universal Title against Roman Reigns in the main event because of course he is so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

JR and Jerry Lawler come out for commentary with Byron Saxton for a bit of a feel good moment. It’s a brawl to start with English getting backdropped out, much to the fans’ annoyance. Anderson dumps Konnor and Ziggler starts his tradition of hanging on to avoid elimination. There goes Hawkins as we still need to clear out a lot of the ring. Former partners R-Truth and Goldust shake hands with Goldust eliminating him, cutting off JR’s Bearcat Wright’s references.

Primo is out next as there’s almost nothing between these eliminations. Kanellis gets tossed and Ziggler hangs on again. Things settle down a bit unto Apollo knees Breeze as JR mocks Ziggler for always having to save himself. Viktor is gone too and the Revival beats on Ryder but he’s right back up. The Broski Boot is loaded up on Ziggler (JR: “Ziggler in trouble. Again.”) but Rawley Pounces Ryder out in a nice touch. A Liger kick from Gable eliminates Anderson and Titus gets rid of Gallows as we take a break.

Apollo getting backdropped out and Benjamin follows him…and let’s look at the announcers. We come back with Rhyno and the Revival gone and Kane eliminating Axel and Dallas. And now, we look at John Cena in the crowd as a fan, because I had forgotten about that stupid story. Back with Sin Cara eliminated by Corbin and Fandango dancing at Kane, earning himself an elimination off a single uppercut.

Corbin gets rid of Slater and Kane eliminates Gable, leaving us with the big power showdown. Everyone else jumps the monsters and it’s a superkick to Titus, setting a clothesline to get rid of him. We’re down to Corbin, Dillinger, Goldust, Rawley, Ziggler, Hardy and Kane as Goldust loads up Shattered Dreams on Dillinger. That’s broken up by Ziggler so Goldust ties him up for Shattered Dreams as well. Dillinger takes the kick but Ziggler eliminates Goldust.

That leaves us with a TEN vs. DELETE battle with a Twist of Fate and Dillinger is gone. Kane tosses Ziggler but gets eliminated by Corbin to get us down to Corbin, Hardy and Rawley. A fireman’s carry faceplant drops Hardy and the villains go for the elimination….but here’s the returning Bray Wyatt for Sister Abigail into an elimination for Rawley. Corbin drops Wyatt but gets backdropped out to give Matt the win at 16:36.

Rating: D+. It was a battle royal that got a lot of time and wasn’t all that interesting. The ending was a cool moment and it’s the best way to get everyone on the card, even if most of these people mean a grand total of nothing. It’s not a good match or even anything memorable, but at least it got the crowd warmed up….with an hour to go before the show itself starts.

Post match Matt thanks Bray and we get a hug, which JR deems a Wrestlemania moment.

Cruiserweight Title: Cedric Alexander vs. Mustafa Ali

Tournament final to crown a new champion after Enzo Amore was finally banished. Ali debuts his SubZero look, which he still uses a year later. They’re both very happy to be there and slaps hands before getting started. Cedric scores with a shoulder block but gets headscissored down as the announcers are right there to play up the power vs. speed idea, though you don’t exactly think of power when it comes to Alexander.

Now the 054 connects for two, the first time the move has ever only gotten a near fall. Another 054 misses and it’s a pair of spinning back elbows to Ali’s face. A third turns Ali inside out and the Lumbar Check makes Cedric champion at 12:21. Cedric immediately hugs the unconscious Ali in a nice show of sportsmanship.

Rating: B. I was pulling for Ali but it felt like a title match between two guys fighting with everything they had. Cedric was the favorite in the entire tournament but Ali came off looking like a star the whole way through. This was rather good stuff and should have been the Kickoff Show main event, though I’ll take a good match when I can.

Kickoff Show: Women’s Battle Royal

Dana Brooke, Becky Lynch, Sarah Logan, Lana, Bianca Belair, Naomi, Sonya Deville, Mandy Rose, Carmella, Peyton Royce, Natalya, Dakota Kai, Mickie James, Taynara Conti, Ruby Riott, Kairi Sane, Sasha Banks, Liv Morgan, Kavita Devi, Bayley

This was going to be the Fabulous Moolah Memorial Battle Royal but history intervened and it’s just a regular battle royal this time around. Paige and Beth Phoenix are on commentary and the former has some advice: don’t get thrown over the top rope. Becky comes out first, everyone else comes out, followed by Sasha and Bayley to fill out the field. Miss Money in the Bank Carmella (erg) poses with the briefcase to start and everyone gangs up on her for the easy elimination.

Deville, who got the elimination, poses in the big circle of women but Dana gets thrown in the middle instead. That means trash talk from Brooke and the big beatdown is on with Mandy tossing Dana. The NXT women team up to send the main roster women outside (through the ropes rather than over, which I can’t stand in battle royals) so we can get the WE ARE NXT pose.

Becky yells at Devi about orange being HER COLOR as some of the main roster women get back in. Kai eliminates Mandy as Paige declares Deville her favorite member of Absolution. We stop for the NXT women to triple team Deville, setting up Belair’s 450, because THAT MAKES SENSE IN A BATTLE ROYAL! Deville is out and we take a break, coming back with Sane being tossed after hitting the Insane Elbow thanks to more ganging up on Riott during the break.

Lana and Devi are tossed and Conti gets kicked out by the Squad. Becky and Belair have a less than thrilling slugout and the hair whip is incredibly loud. Belair misses a charge though and gets kicked out, followed by Kai kicking Naomi in the face. Banks gets rid of Kai without much effort and there goes Becky to a chorus of boos (I think Becky will be fine). Ruby knocks Mickie out and it’s Royce’s turn to kick people in the face.

Logan powerbombs her out as well though and we’re down to Morgan, Logan, Riott, Bayley, Banks, Natalya and Naomi, who is out on the floor (oh dear). For some reason Natalya decides to pose with her back turned to the Squad but manages to suplex Ruby and Sarah at the same time.

Bayley saves Sasha from a suplex and helps get rid of Natalya. Morgan is out as well and there goes Ruby. Banks sends Logan to the apron and Bayley knocks her out, leaving us with Banks and Bayley. The fans actually get on their feet to cheer for this one and the handshake…lets Bayley throw Banks out to a big reaction but Naomi gets back in for the Rear View. That’s enough for the win at 9:39.

Rating: F+. I had forgotten how annoying that ending was but it makes you realize just how stupid this whole thing was. Bayley and Banks would go on to have their weird semi-feud and then partnership over the year while Naomi has done NOTHING important since this match. You have something here with Bayley and the bright idea is to do the HAHA WE TRICKED YOU ending? That’s been done to death in battle royals and it’s not like this was anything more than a surprise ending, which was really stupid given how Bayley had been searching for anything important for the last year. This actually ticked me off again so well done.

Jojo introduces Chloe and Hallie to sing America the Beautiful, describing them as the “future of music”. Well if Jojo says it then it must be true.

The opening video shows shots of parties in New Orleans and, just like in 2014, features a tagline of Let The Good Times Roll. They couldn’t come up with anything else in four years? And the theme song is still Celebrate by Kid Rock. Ok it’s a catchy song, but is there nothing else (or no one else) that they could use?

Yay pyro! And cool set with the Mardi Gras mask, which looked awesome all night long.

I was in the stadium for this show, sitting in the lower bowl and looking not quite directly at the far post on the right side opposite the hard camera.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Finn Balor vs. The Miz

Miz is defending and we get the new idea this year: 3D graphics for some of the entrances, including Miz who gets the Miz logo and various words to describe him, including MOVIE STAR. Miz sends the Miztourage to the back because he wants to do this himself for his newborn daughter. The weird part is you couldn’t see those in the stadium (obviously) but you could see them on the screens around the building, which made your head snap around a few times.

Balor isn’t the Demon here, but instead comes out with a bunch of LGBT people in rainbow Balor Club shirts labeled FOR EVERYONE. If nothing else, it’s awesome to see the stadium doing the Balor pose at once. This was set up with both guys beating Miz in one night, because Balor beating Miz after Miz had a long match with Rollins is totally the same thing.

They all go for the way too early rollups to start with Miz being sent outside. That means Rollins can miss a Stomp on Balor but a superkick to the ribs works just fine. Balor sends Rollins outside though and it’s the big running flip dive onto both of them for the first major pop of the night. Back in and basement dropkick gives Balor two on Miz but Rollins is back in with a high crossbody.

Miz finally gets to do something other than get beaten up as we look at Cena in the crowd again. Rollins grabs a double Blockbuster for two on Miz but he’s right back up with a knee to the ribs (not face Cole). The chinlock goes on, which shouldn’t be the case less than four minutes into a triple threat. Back up and a neckbreaker gets two on Miz as they’re just trading moves until we get to the big stuff. Another chinlock seems to annoy Balor so he gets up again and hits the double stomp to Miz’s ribs.

Rollins is back in for a Sling Blade to Balor, setting up a suicide dive to Balor and Miz. A superkick drops Balor again but Miz comes in with a DDT for two. Miz goes with the strategy by bending Balor’s knee around the ropes and slapping on the Figure Four. The frog splash from Rollins (from out of nowhere for an awesome visual) breaks it up and all three of them head outside.

Balor escapes the barricade powerbomb and dropkicks them both into the barricade instead. Back in again and 1916 gets two on Rollins but Miz breaks up the Coup de Grace. Instead of the Tower of Doom though it’s the buckle bomb to Miz and a superplex into the Falcon Arrow to Balor. The Skull Crushing Finale gives Miz two on Rollins and they’re all down again.

Balor does his hop over the ropes in the corner but gets crotched for trying the Coup de Grace again. It’s just not working this time dude. Miz goes up top with Balor and catches a springboarding Rollins with something close to a super Skull Crushing Finale. Balor breaks it up with a Coup de Grace and hits a second on Miz but the Stomp breaks that up too. Another Stomp hits Miz to give Rollins the pin and the title at 15:37.

Rating: B-. This might have been a few minutes too long but Rollins winning was a fine call as he’s more than over enough and kind of fits the Workrate Champion idea to perfection. Miz can come back and break the all time days record later and Balor is over no matter what. Not a great match, but a very hot opener and the fans were into everything here.

We recap the Smackdown Women’s Title match, which is billed as the BIGGEST WOMEN’S MATCH IN WRESTLEMANIA HISTORY. My how times change. Anyway Charlotte is the queen of everything and Asuka won the Royal Rumble to earn this shot. It’s absolutely a dream match with Charlotte being Charlotte and Asuka still being undefeated.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Asuka

Charlotte is defending and gets the full Ric Flair theme song, complete with a HHH from Wrestlemania XXX inspired entrance, meaning soldiers to help her off a throne and take her robe. Asuka on the other hand gets the CGI masks with rainbow colored lines surrounding them, which look cool on screen but live….not so much. They lock up to start and take turns flipping out of wristlocks for an early standoff.

Charlotte loads up a monkey flip but instead trips the leg for a failed Figure Eight attempt. You can feel the intensity here and it’s working well so far. Some chops to the chest (and one to the face) have Asuka in trouble but she’s right back with a hip attack to knock Charlotte outside. Back in and it’s time to start in on the arm but Charlotte gets in a backbreaker into an STO. Charlotte uses a Backpack Stunner to get out of a sleeper and a knee to the back of the head keeps Asuka in trouble.

It’s enough trouble for Charlotte to go up top for the moonsault….which is countered into a triangle for a sweet escape. Charlotte reverses into a Boston crab until Asuka makes the rope. A sliding kick to the face knocks Charlotte backwards and it’s back to the arm as Asuka continues to follow her game plan. They head to the apron with Asuka suplexing her out to the floor in a good looking crash. Sometimes you need to just go with a big spot like that and it worked very well.

Back in and they stare each other down until Asuka just erupts with strikes to the face. A missile dropkick gets two and Asuka stomps on the back. Charlotte is fine enough for the chops to catch Asuka on top and it’s a super Spanish Fly for two with the fans getting much more into things in a hurry. Natural Selection is countered into something like an Octopus Hold from Asuka’s back for a cool change of pace.

Charlotte tries to flip out and into the Figure Eight but Asuka kicks her in the head for a block. Well that’s certainly to the point. The Asuka Lock is blocked and Charlotte hits a very good spear for two more as the fans are WAY into this. With nothing else working, Charlotte goes to the Figure Eight and bridges up with one arm….and Asuka taps at 13:05 in a shocker.

Rating: A-. I don’t get shocked by results very often but I was actually stunned to see how this went. I would have bet money on Asuka walking out as champion here but Charlotte winning was far from a ridiculous result. Now the problem is what this did to Asuka, as she only started to recover from the loss nearly a year later. Charlotte would lose the title to Carmella two days later, bringing some dark days to the belt. This however was anything but dark, with an outstanding match between two stars.

Post match Asuka gets the mic and says Charlotte was ready for her in the ultimate sign of respect.

With Charlotte on the ramp and Asuka in the ring, a referee tells Cena something that makes him get out of his seat and run up the ramp. You really couldn’t wait until the women were gone so they could have the full moment?

US Title: Bobby Roode vs. Jinder Mahal vs. Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Orton is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Aiden English (now bald, meaning he shaved his head since the end of the battle royal when he had hair) handles Rusev’s entrance and we get my favorite shot every year: a closeup of someone with the camera swinging around to show the stadium crowd in front of them. There’s something so cool about seeing just how big of a stage they’re really on. Anyway, Rusev is crazy over and easily the crowd favorite. Does anyone else see an issue with Orton’s music saying “I hear voices in my head” while his Titantron says IN MY VEINS?

While you think about that, Orton and Mahal are sent outside, leaving Rusev to dropkick (yes dropkick) Roode to the floor. A RUSEV DAY Cannonball off the apron takes Orton and Mahal down again but Roode is back in with a Blockbuster for two on Rusev. The other two get back in and it’s Mahal getting beaten up by Orton and Roode before being tossed right back to the floor. Orton hits the top rope superplex on Roode with Rusev and Mahal diving back in for the save.

That’s enough for Mahal to ask Rusev for a partnership but Rusev doesn’t even bother waiting before hitting Mahal with a spinning belly to back suplex for two. Roode makes it worse by busting Mahal’s spine and hitting the GLORIOUS pose, only to have Orton make a save this time.

That leaves Orton alone in the ring and it’s the hanging DDT on Rusev. The RKO hits English, Rusev and Mahal so it’s Roode making a save of his own. Roode blocks the RKO and plants Orton with the Glorious DDT as Mahal saves. The Machka Kick drops Mahal but Sunil Singh offers a distraction, letting Mahal hit the Khallas for the pin on Rusev at 8:14. You could literally feel the energy go out of the crowd.

Rating: D+. There was some hard work in there but this was the definition of Vince saying screw the audience because it’s all about what I want. Rusev was one of the most popular guys in the company and had been for months but instead we get Mahal, who was an all time bomb as WWE Champion getting to pin Rusev.

It’s not like there was even a long term plan as Mahal would lose the title a mere eight days later. Rusev would indeed get the title nearly nine months later, after his popularity had fallen way down, meaning it was acceptable to give the fans what they want. This really hurt the show and it’s going to be hard to recover.

We recap Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon and yeah I think this might help the recovery process. After being at Wrestlemania XXXI and attacking Stephanie, Rousey made her official WWE debut at the Royal Rumble earlier in the year. She wanted to go to Wrestlemania and since she was (at the time) the most dominant female UFC fighter of all time, Stephanie wanted to mold her into a WWE star.

Angle, who had been screwed over by Stephanie and HHH before, warned Ronda that they would mess with her too. That didn’t sit well with Rousey, who beat both of them up on the way to this mixed tag match. Naturally we got a lot of Stephanie workout videos because she’s STEPHANIE and that makes her some wrestling legend. It’s sickening, and I was waiting on her to survive the armbar in the match. It was clear that this was going to be full of smoke and mirrors, but the question is how well Rousey is going to do in her debut. This is one of the main events of the show and something a lot of people really wanted to see.

Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon

HHH and Stephanie come out on matching motorcycles (flanked by four women on their own motorcycles), with Stephanie’s biker look (including the leather pants) making me a lot less annoyed at her. Cole: “Even though Stephanie is a former Women’s Champion, this is her Wrestlemania in-ring debut!” WWE pretending that Stephanie was a wrestler is one of their more interesting character tweaks. Rousey gets a huge reaction and of course smiles at the crowd, as is her custom. Cole talks about two people starting in UFC and coming to WWE: Ken Shamrock and now Rousey. So they’re not Dan Severn fans either?

The fans are WAY behind Rousey as they stare each other down in the middle. Stephanie shoves Rousey in the face because Stephanie just never learns. A hair pull doesn’t prove to be the brightest idea either so Stephanie bails to the apron so the guys can start us off. Angle (very badly) punches at HHH and the beating is on in the corner. A hammerlock keeps HHH does as we’re just waiting for this to explode as it should be doing.

Stephanie manages to lure Rousey in though and Angle gets low bridged to the floor. Cole calls this “that McMahon instinct” as the worship is already a lot to take. Angle gets sent into the steps and Rousey is about to lose it because she can’t intervene. Some more cheap shots from Stephanie keep Rousey angry and a spinebuster gives HHH two. A front facelock keeps Angle down but he gets a boot up in the corner.

Stephanie chokes Angle and HHH nearly hits her by mistake but it’s still too early for the hot tag. A suplex drops HHH again but Stephanie runs around and pulls Rousey off the apron. HHH gets whipped over the corner for the real crash and you can see the panic in Stephanie. The hot tag brings in Rousey (Graves: “CALL THE COPS!!!”) who SPRINTS over to Stephanie and throws her down with a suplex. After the required tug of the shorts, Rousey unloads with rights and lefts in the corner as the fans are already losing it. The release throw sends Stephanie back into the corner and Graves is terrified.

The fans want and receive the armbar….but Stephanie blocks it. Yes the hold that UFC fighters were powerless again is a simple block for Stephanie as the crowd’s soul is slapped down again. Stephanie blocks it a second time and rakes the eyes (Cole: “Complete manipulation of the rules!” Ignore the complete manipulation of reality and focus on those rules man.”), setting up a double arm crank as the fans try to process that they’re really doing this.

Stephanie even mocks Rousey, who grabs her by the throat and hits the swinging Samoan drop for two with HHH pulling the referee. Rousey: “I’m going to continue beating up your wife ok?” HHH pulls her out as well, apparently not a fan of such chatty opponents. Angle is back up and sends HHH over the announcers’ table but gets thrown onto the Spanish table. After a slow crawl, HHH is back in and sees Rousey, who is ready to fight. HHH puts the referee in the corner and sizes Rousey up and the beating is on in the corner.

A legsweep looks to set up the swinging Samoan drop but Stephanie makes a save. I know I’m not a big HHH fan a lot of the time but he just made Rousey look like the biggest star in the history of the division. Rousey chases Stephanie outside though and has to adjust the gear again, allowing Stephanie to post her. Angle is back in for some belly to belly suplexes and the rolling Germans but the ankle lock is countered. The Pedigree is countered as well and HHH gets catapulted into the corner, setting up the Angle Slam for two with no one making a save.

Stephanie breaks up the ankle lock and yells at Angle, who catches the boot to the ribs. HHH has to save his wife and Pedigrees Angle for two with Rousey making her own save this time. With Angle down, HHH loads Rousey up for a powerbomb but gets hurricanranaed (!) into the armbar on HHH (I completely bought that as the finish live) until Stephanie grabs a choke.

That’s reversed into an armbar and Stephanie has the gall to block it AGAIN. Angle ankle locks HHH, who rolls Angle into Rousey for the real save. Rousey and Angle get posted and it’s time for stereo Pedigrees, both of which are broken up. The armbar is slapped on again and this time Rousey uses the leverage to pull back and Stephanie finally taps at 20:37.

Rating: A. That’s not even on a sliding scale because Rousey knocked that out harder than she knocked out Alexis Davis. She looked like she’s been doing this for ten years and had one of the best debut matches I’ve ever seen. Everyone else was nailing it too and I got completely sucked into it both live and watching it back because all of the stuff was that good. Don’t have Stephanie block the armbar so often and this is an A+ easy.

That was the only downgrade, even though you knew full well it was coming. To be fair though, Stephanie did tap out clean in the end so it wasn’t the most ridiculous thing ever. Well the first part was but not the finish. After this, how can you now see Rousey as the star that she already was?

Stephanie has to be helped out, as she should. She would get armbarred again the next night for a bonus.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Kofi wastes no time in hitting Trouble in Paradise on Jey but Harper pulls him outside before the count. Jimmy gets sent into the steps and Harper crashes against Big E. against the barricade. With no one else to beat up, Woods gets powerbombed against the post, leaving Rowan to splash Kofi and Jey back inside. The mostly done Jey is thrown outside and Big E. gets knocked off the apron. Jimmy comes back in for a pair of superkicks and Jey is back up for stereo kicks to Harper’s head in the corner.

A jumping enziguri hits Harper and a superkick knocks Rowan to the floor, setting up a double suplex on the outside. Harper catches Kofi with a swinging release Boss Man Slam but gets caught with a double superkick on top. Rowan breaks up the Tower of Doom so Kofi charges at Harper, only to get powerbombed by Rowan. An assisted super sitout powerbomb finishes Kofi to give Harper and Rowan the titles at 5:55.

Rating: C-. The time cuts aside, this wasn’t the worst match in the world with the Usos and the New Day giving it all they had against the monsters but not being able to stop them. The Bludgeon Brothers were the first time a team other than the Usos or New Day had held the belts in over a year so this was long, long overdue and the right call.

Here’s what’s coming to the Network, most of which actually happened for a change.

Here’s a fired up John Cena for his match with Undertaker. This comes after weeks of Cena calling out Undertaker for Wrestlemania because Undertaker seemingly retired after last year’s show. Cena came off as the biggest jerk in this feud and acting like Undertaker owed him something. There was no confirmation that Undertaker was going to be here, hence him sitting in the crowd earlier.

That’s the other stupid part of the whole thing: Cena kept talking about how he had no path to Wrestlemania, because JOHN CENA couldn’t get a match. He gave some lame excuse about how this was the only match that mattered and it didn’t do a thing to make up for the consistently annoying lines from commentary about Cena possibly being left out of Wrestlemania. I get what they were going for, but come on already.

Anyway Cena is ready to go but here’s a referee to say not so fast. Cena is disappointed and the lights go out. It’s only Elias though and Cena heads back to his seat as Elias sings about it being his night. That’s enough for Cena who runs in and beats Elias up before looking disappointed again. Cole: “I guess that would be a Wrestlemania moment right?” He goes up the ramp but stops….and the lights go out again. A spotlight hits the ring with Undertaker’s hat, coat and boots, which are hit by lighting (looks awful on the Network, looked great when you didn’t see it coming in the stadium. They’re gone, and the gong strikes.

Undertaker vs. John Cena

I know he’s been old for ten years, but that entrance live, especially in the stadium, is chilling. Cole of course can’t SHUT UP, saying everything he can think of, including calling them the two greatest performers of all time. Undertaker goes straight at him in the corner to start and hits the jumping clothesline. Old School connects and Undertaker hits some running clotheslines in the corner. Snake Eyes into the big boot into the big leg have Cena rocked but the chokeslam is escaped.

Cena’s belly to back connects but Undertaker sits up before the Shuffle, making Cena fall down in fear. The chokeslam into the Tombstone finishes Cena at 2:48. The more I think of this one, the more I like it. Cena ran his mouth for so long and Undertaker annihilated him here, just as he should have. While a lot of people will be annoyed at not getting a full form match between these two, I’d rather they do this than have Undertaker look back in a fifteen minute match.

Video on the Hall of Fame ceremony.

Here’s the Hall of Fame Class, which really doesn’t need to air on the show. They already get a whole evening to themselves. Do we really need ten minutes on Wrestlemania too?

Jeff Jarrett (eh sure, though it’s still weird to see him here)

Mark Henry (still not sure on him, though his documentary was great)

Hillbilly Jim (I’m a Kentucky boy but come on)

Ivory (she looks better now than she did during her career)

Jarius JJ Robertson (Warrior Award)

Dudley Boyz (yep)

Goldberg (yep, though I’d call the Dudleys more appropriate headliners)

Oh and Kid Rock, this year’s celebrity inductee, wasn’t there because he had a concert.

We recap Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens. Bryan somehow overcame his injuries and returned to the ring in something I still can barely believe. Owens and Zayn had tormented Smackdown boss Shane for months and then attacked Bryan for firing them the night he was announced as being cleared. Therefore it’s a tag match with Owens and Zayn fighting for their jobs. Yeah that’s all well and good. The point here is Bryan actually getting back in the ring, which is almost impossible to imagine.

Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens vs. Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon

Owens and Zayn beat McMahon up on Smackdown to cover for Shane’s legitimate medical issues. Chris Jericho was apparently on red phone alert for this show with a plan to have him fly in from a Fozzy show on the corporate jet in case Shane couldn’t make the show. Bryan gets a special entrance with a weird military/Terminator themed video showing a target on the Superdome before looking at the YES Movement spreading throughout the world in a cool moment. You can feel the emotions in Bryan as he comes down the aisle and it’s an amazing sight to behold.

Owens and Zayn jump the good guys from behind and Shane gets thrown over the barricade. Bryan takes a Helluva kick and the apron powerbomb to leave him laying. Medics come out to check on Bryan as yes, they actually are trying to stretch this out even further. Shane is willing to fight on his own and unloads with the really bad punches to Owens in the corner.

There’s the jumping back elbow but Shane grabs his stomach due to the diverticulitis (the same thing that ruined Lesnar’s UFC career). A DDT drops Sami but Owens gets in a shot to the stomach to cut Shane off. We settle down into a regular match with Sami elbowing the ribs and going for one cover after another. Owens steps on the ribs and applauds Bryan for such a great return. A t-bone suplex gives Sami two and a superkick into the Blue Thunder Bomb is good for the same. The fans don’t care about this whatsoever and there’s no reason for them to.

With Bryan STILL being tended to at ringside, it’s just a big waiting game until Bryan gets back up and makes the hot tag. The Helluva Kick misses in the corner and Sami gets tied in the Tree of Woe. Coast to Coast hits but Shane can’t follow up because of the stomach. Owens drops the frog splash on Shane but Bryan dives in for the save to bring the fans back to life. The hot tag is cut off though and we hit the chinlock to make the fans wait a little longer. A belly to back suplex gets Shane out of trouble though and there’s the tag, with Bryan taking his time before getting in for an awesome moment.

House is cleaned and it’s the moonsault over Sami into the running clothesline. Owens comes back in and Bryan gets them in opposite corners for alternating running dropkicks. Sami is back with a Helluva Kick for two on Bryan and Owens superkicks Shane to the floor. The Pop Up Powerbomb gets two more and Owens is shocked at the kickout. Shane dives onto Owens, leaving Sami to yell at Bryan for coming back and punch him in the face. That’s enough for Bryan and the fight is on, including the YES Kicks. The running knee sets up the YES Lock to make Sami tap at 15:24.

Rating: C+. This was two matches in one with the rather boring beatdown of Shane for the first half before Bryan came in and gave the fans exactly what they wanted for the second half. It was all about Bryan and that’s all it was supposed to be. The idea that he actually made it back to the ring is amazing and one of the most surprising stories you’ll ever see in wrestling. He deserved a big moment like this and that’s what we got here, albeit after Shane got in his own time of course.

Attendance announcement, with pyro because it’s Wrestlemania.

We recap Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss. They were friends, but Jax found out that Bliss was making fun of her behind her back. Jax went into monster mode and chased after Bliss and her friend Mickie James, setting up this match. Now there’s no reason this shouldn’t be about thirty seconds long, but it’s Wrestlemania and what matters is getting on the card and having a long match instead of doing what makes sense.

Raw Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax

Bliss, with James in her corner, is defending and is lowered down to the stage on a platform for a nice touch. We get the Big Match Intros and Bliss immediately backs up as she should. Jax gets smart and runs Mickie over before the bell rings to send her outside for a heck of a beatdown. Bliss tries to intervene and gets glared back to the ring, leaving James to take a Samoan drop on the floor.

We get back inside for the opening bell and Bliss slaps her in the face. That earns a scream from Nia so Bliss screams back in true scream queen fashion. A gorilla press slam has Bliss bailing to the floor and it’s time to leave, only to have Nia run her over again. Back in and Bliss pokes her in the eye before going after the knee in a smart move.

What’s not a smart move is this match already going nearly three minutes with Bliss getting in any significant offense. A basement dropkick keeps Jax in trouble but a guillotine choke is easily countered via an overhead belly to belly suplex. Jax goes shoulder first into the post as the fans are quiet all over again. Twisted Bliss to a standing Nia on the floor gives Bliss another knockdown, setting up the short DDT for two back inside.

Bliss yells at her so Nia tells her to shut up already and the destruction begins. Another poke to the eye is no sold and Bliss gets whipped hard into the buckles. Bliss goes to the eye again to get out of the Samoan drop but Jax drives her into the corner and then drops her. That’s not enough as it’s a super Samoan drop to give Jax the pin and the title at 9:02.

Rating: D-. What were they thinking here? The whole story was that Bliss was all talk and survived because of Nia but then she hangs with Nia for the better part of ten minutes? This should have been thirty seconds long with Bliss getting the title back later on (as she did in June) after coming back from getting squashed. Just a bad idea all around here, save for Jax FINALLY winning the title.

We recap AJ Styles defending the Smackdown World Title against Shinsuke Nakamura. They had a classic match in Japan and a lot of fans wanted to see it again in WWE. Nakamura won the Royal Rumble and the match was on, with both guys trying to get in the other’s head on the way to New Orleans. So yeah, they’re just going with “it’s a dream match” for the build, which works just fine.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura is challenging and gets played to the ring by Nita Strauss (awesome guitar player and rather gorgeous at the same time). The army of violinists and drummers help too. Since WWE can’t go more than five minutes without making some kind of a mistake, AJ is billed as Universal Champion. They lock up to start with Nakamura getting the better of it with some knees to the ribs.

Good Vibrations is blocked and AJ gets in his own knee before starting in on the back. Styles grabs a chinlock for a bit before dropkicking him to the floor. That’s not the best idea though as it’s a kick to the head to stagger Styles and the champ is in trouble for the first time. Nakamura’s middle rope kick to the face gets two and that’s a COME ON to set up the strikes to the face.

The running knee to the ribs in the corner gets two but AJ is right back with a belly to back faceplant. A sliding forearm into the pumphandle gutbuster gets two on Nakamura as they’re trading big spots. AJ’s springboard is countered into the Landslide (Samoan driver) for two but Nakamura needs a minute before following up. With nothing else working, Nakamura goes with the kicks, which are countered into the Calf Crusher.

Since it’s Nakamura, that’s reversed into a triangle choke, which AJ powers into something like a fisherman’s buster for another double knockdown. It’s Nakamura up first and trying a running knee in the corner but the bad knee hit the buckle instead. AJ is right back with a Phenomenal Forearm for two in the required kickout of the first finisher.

The springboard 450 hits knees and Nakamura grabs a small package for two of his own. They slug it out until AJ nails the Pele but can’t follow up, allowing Nakamura to knee him in the back of the head for a much nearer fall. The reverse exploder looks to set up the Kinshasa but AJ rolls through into the Styles Clash for the pin to retain at 20:21.

Rating: B+. This was close to being a classic but it’s really just a very good match instead. Part of the problem here is how late the match came in the show. The fans were starting to get worn down and there was only so much energy left in the people. Also it never quite got to the epic level that they were shooting for with Nakamura never really getting the close near falls that he needed to take it to another level. Still that, very good and worthy of a Wrestlemania title match.

We recap the Kickoff Show. This is another few minutes that could be cut off.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Braun Strowman/???

The Bar is defending after Strowman won a battle royal to become #1 contenders despite not having a partner. Therefore the big question for over a month is who would the partner be. The Bar comes out on a Mardi Gras float, complete with people in large headed costumes for a cool visual. There’s no partner for Strowman, who breaks up the float before coming to the ring.

Strowman and the kid get in the ring where the kid is introduced as Nicholas (the son of referee John Cone). Cole: “This is really happening.” He’s never been more right. Oh and the search for a partner and introduction took about four and a half minutes, again because this show can just keep going. Strowman takes Sheamus into the corner with no problem to start before beating up Cesaro as well.

Nicholas is terrified (as he should be) as Cesaro dropkicks Strowman in the knee. A double suplex lets Sheamus drop a top rope knee, setting up an assisted swanton from Sheamus’ shoulders. Strowman comes back with a double crossbody and backdrops Sheamus over the top, bouncing him off the post in the process. To cap it off, Strowman tags Nicholas in. The kid is terrified and tags Strowman back in for the powerslam to Cesaro for the pin and the titles at 3:58.

Rating: F. I….what do you want from me here? This was an idea that completely failed because WWE had no idea what to do here and this is all they could do. Put Heath Slater or someone in there, or have Strowman do a rendition of Me And My Shadow and have him win it by himself. It was a joke that was literally forgotten the next night and stretched the show out even more because they couldn’t just cut this and put Strowman ANYWHERE else. I’m sure Matt Hardy had to win the battle royal right?

Wrestlemania 35 is in New York/Jersey. You don’t hear New Jersey mentioned here, but I guess it’s just implied.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns for the Universal Title. It’s the latest attempt to make Reigns feel like the mega star because the first few times didn’t take. Therefore he won the Elimination Chamber (beating Strowman after Strowman eliminated everyone else), THIS TIME FOR SURE! Lesnar has been champion for a year and barely ever defends the title, because that was so successful the first few times. Their fights over the last few weeks get the music video treatment.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is challenging and WOW the fans are not happy to see him. To make it a little better, Brock drives him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs, followed by the German suplexes. Reigns pops up with a Superman Punch to send Brock to the floor as they’re starting fast again. Back in and a clothesline knocks Lesnar over the top and out to the floor as the fans chant things to amuse themselves.

Lesnar catches him with a belly to belly on the floor and another one drops Reigns on his head. There’s the required CM PUNK chant and a third belly to belly sends Reigns face first into the announcers’ table because Brock didn’t realize how much room he had. Back in and Lesnar throws another German suplex, declaring it SUPLEX CITY B****. More suplexes ensue because that’s what Lesnar does in a big time match. Brock gets tired of that and loads up the announcers’ table but Reigns posts him for a much needed breather.

A spear puts Lesnar onto (not through) another table as the fans boo the heck out of this. Or maybe they’re mad about losing a beach ball. The Superman Punch into a pair of spears gets two and now the fans are definitely happy with a beach ball. Brock blocks a spear with a knee to the face that brings Graves out of his chair.

The first F5 gets two and virtually no reaction from the crowd. Another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. To switch it up, another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. The fans declare it boring so Lesnar takes him outside for the fourth F5 through the announcers’ table. Lesnar takes it back inside and stands there as the fans do something else in the crowd that goes from cheering to booing during the same closeup.

The fifth F5 gets two so Lesnar takes the gloves off at Heyman’s orders. The fans call it awful as Lesnar hammers away to bust Reigns open. It’s quite the gusher but Reigns slips out of the F5 and hits a pair of spears for two. Another spear is countered into the sixth F5 to retain the title at 15:51.

Rating: D+. Well of course he does. The problem here is that there is good action in the match but it’s too much of the same stuff and the fans having none of it that took away its value. Couple that with knowing that we’re just waiting on even more Reigns title shots and promos about needing to be champion and there was no way this was going to work. The fans (including myself) were done with this WAY before the match started and that’s all there was to it.

Reigns gets cleaned up and we get the long video package. Back in the stadium, Reigns leaves and the show ends. I stood around for a long time while this was going on because the video doesn’t play in the stadium and it wasn’t clear if the show was over or not.

Overall Rating: C-. I know I (and a lot of other people) say it over and over but it’s just too long. There is a limit to how long you can sit watching wrestling in person or at home and Wrestlemania has blown past that for years now. At some point you just stop caring and there’s very little that can be done to fix such a problem. They need to do something because this isn’t going to work no matter what they do. Cut out a lot of stuff and it’s a great show, but the whole package didn’t work.

There’s a lot of good stuff in here, such as the opener, AJ vs. Nakamura, Charlotte vs. Asuka, the mixed tag and a few other moments here and there. The problem is there’s so much other stuff that either doesn’t work (the main event, the Raw Women’s Title match and the Raw Tag Team Titles are great places to start) that it really doesn’t work. Get rid of some of that and the show is that much better.

Overall, it comes down to the problem of WWE not listening to the fans. They can throw out as much good content as they want, but if you do it to annoy the fans (the US Title match) or to stretch things out even further past its expiration point (the Universal Title), it’s going to come back to mess things up. There is so much on here that fans don’t want to see and WWE just won’t fix it.

That doesn’t help the length either. If you have a show where the final match is something the fans do not want to see, you’re going to have them sitting there, already annoyed at other things in the show, for hours waiting to see something that only WWE seems interested in. How is that supposed to be appealing for over seven hours? Cut it down, give us something else to cheer for, and remember that Wrestlemania is supposed to be about the best of the best, not everyone on the roster.

Ratings Comparison

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D-

Redo: D+

Mustafa Ali vs. Cedric Alexander

Original: B-

Redo: B

Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Original: D+

Redo: F+

Seth Rollins vs. The Miz vs. Finn Balor

Original: B

Redo: B-

Charlotte vs. Asuka

Original: A-

Redo: A

Jinder Mahal vs. Rusev vs. Randy Orton vs. Bobby Roode

Original: D

Redo: D+

Stephanie McMahon/HHH vs. Kurt Angle/Ronda Rousey

Original: A-

Redo: A

New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Undertaker vs. John Cena

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

Redo: B+

Braun Strowman/Nicholas vs. The Bar

Original: F

Redo: F

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C-

This is an interesting one as most of the matches are within the same ballpark but I liked the show a lot better the first time around. Maybe the good was more fun just after the show, but this really didn’t do it for me nearly as well on another viewing. It’s watchable, but definitely not a very good show.

Here’s the original if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/04/14/wrestlemania-xxxiv-the-same-old-story/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXXIII (2018 Edition): Please Stop

Wrestlemania XXXIII
Date: April 2, 2017
Location: Camping World Stadium, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 75,245
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga, Tom Phillips

This hasn’t been quite a year yet but I have a feeling it’s going to be a very long night. Like a few years before, I was in the stadium for this show but haven’t seen it since I reviewed it last year. This is a show that was well received at the time and it could be interesting to see how it holds up a year later. Let’s get to it.

The set is one of the most intricate they’ve ever done, with a big Wrestlemania globe (ala Universal Studios) and a roller coaster next to it (I think you get this). There’s also an inflatable ring atop the structure above the regular ring, which I somehow didn’t notice until about an hour and a half of being in the stadium). The theme was the Ultimate Thrill Ride and the visual certainly works. It’s really cool looking and worked very well. Unfortunately the stadium isn’t the best looking in the world and it made the whole thing feel a bit out of place. Oh and the CRAZY LONG RAMP, which is something like seventy yards long.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Austin Aries vs. Neville

Aries is challenging after Neville has dominated the division for months and needs someone fresh to challenge him. The fans are behind Aries, which isn’t that surprising though Neville was nothing short (ok he was always short) of awesome at this point. Aries takes him down with an armbar but Neville is right back out with a headscissors. Back up and Neville has to bail to the floor so Aries has a rest on the top rope. I know it’s a Shawn Michaels spot but Aries sells the heck out of it.

Neville comes back in and eats a basement dropkick, followed by the middle rope elbow to the back for two. The suicide dive is blocked with a kick to the head though as the back and forth continues. A missile dropkick gives Neville two and we take a break. Back with Neville holding a chinlock (They even do it on the Kickoff Shows!) but taking WAY too long to glare at the crowd before trying a middle rope Phoenix splash (makes sense given his King thing).

One heck of a backdrop puts Neville on the floor and Aries is right back after him with the suicide dive. You can hear the fans getting back into this and that’s a good result from these two. The main reason to put something like this on is to get the fans fired up for the real show and it’s a great place to put them in.

They come back in with Aries blocking the superplex and nailing his own missile dropkick (looked awesome too) for a near fall. A snap German suplex plants Aries though and Neville takes over again. Another suplex gets another two and Neville is starting to look annoyed. With the technical stuff not working, Neville just kicks him in the face in the corner.

Aries is fine enough to reverse the Rings of Saturn attempt into a rollup and now the Discus knocks Neville hard to the floor. Back in and Aries hits a top hurricanrana and the 450 (with a really annoying crowd reaction shot) gets two. The Last Chancery goes on but Neville rips at the eye (which was recently reconstructed) to break the hold. Aries is writhing in pain and it’s the Red Arrow to retain the title at 15:40.

Rating: B. I remember hearing that this would be on the Kickoff Show and being very relieved as I didn’t think the main show would allow it nearly the amount of time that it needed and deserved. I’m glad to see that I was right here as they had a heck of a chess match here with both guys getting in everything they could and showing how back and forth the whole thing was. Neville cheating to win in the end fit him well, as he finally had someone who could match him and had to take a shortcut. Really good stuff here as Neville continues his unbelievable roll.

If the pay per view started here, it would have been a perfect Kickoff Show. But nah, we need two more matches.

Kickoff Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Rob Gronkowski, a friend of Mojo Rawley, is in the front row. Big Show’s music plays everyone but Braun Strowman to the ring. Braun tosses Primo two seconds into the match as the ring needs some serious cleaning out. Kalisto and Simon Gotch are tossed as well and Strowman eliminates Slater. Jimmy Uso and Goldust follow them out as they’re not wasting time here.

There goes Konnor but it’s time for the Show vs. Strowman showdown. Everyone stops to watch but Sami jumps Braun due to reasons of general stupidity. That goes nowhere so it’s Strowman dumping Show. Everyone goes after Strowman but he gets rid of Viktor in the process. Strowman is eliminated, making him look like a loser/afterthought in the process (oh….just wait). Hawkins is out and Ziggler gets to do his usual false hope spot. We get into the required “everyone hits everyone but doesn’t really try to win” portion as things slow down.

Ziggler low bridges Truth out as I manage to remember that Truth is employed. There goes Rhyno and Ziggler is thrown over the top, only to hang on again. There goes English, followed by American Alpha dropkicking English out. Jey Uso and Jason Jordan are tossed, followed by Chad Gable as the ring is really thinning out. Tian Bing gets rid of Fandango and Breeze, followed by Henry eliminating Sin Cara (in some sweet Wrestlemania gear). Henry is out next as there’s nothing between these eliminations.

Ziggler superkicks Bing out and that’s about it for Tian’s career accomplishments to date. Sami’s Helluva Kick gets rid of Epico and we’re down to nine. It’s been too long since Ziggler was nearly eliminated so Harper chokes him on the apron this time around. Mojo dumps Bo and Mahal eliminates Crews, followed by Rawley tossing Ziggler. Harper is out next and we’re down to Mojo, Jinder, Titus, Dain and Zayn.

A running clothesline gets rid of Titus but Dain eliminates Sami, completely sucking the life out of the crowd. Why you ask? Well we’re left with Dain, Rawley and Mahal. How excited would you be? Jinder gets clotheslined down and we get a Dain vs. Mojo showdown. A Pounce drops Dain but Jinder pulls Mojo through the ropes and out to the floor. Jinder follows him out and sends Rawley into the barricade, right in front of Gronkowski.

That means a drink going into Gronkowski’s face and here he comes over the barricade. This gives us the funniest part of the show as a security guard runs over to stop him, only to have a ringside guy tap her on the arm as some referees come over and allow Gronkowski to get in. Gronkowski runs Mahal over (your future WWE Champion everyone) and Mojo’s running right hands get rid of Dain. Another running punch to Mahal gives Rawley the win at 14:09.

Rating: D-. And this just LAUNCHED Mojo to the moon right? I know the idea here was to get Gronkowski involved (possibly as a substitute for Shaquille O’Neal) but Sami Zayn was RIGHT THERE to get the big win but nah, let’s go with the nothing guy winning the match. This wasn’t the best result for the battle royal but at least they were trying with Rawley, who took the time to talk to an entire group of fans when I saw him walking through Axxess that same weekend. Hopefully he gets somewhere in the future. The rest of the match was terrible with everyone being thrown out in short order and a bad ending.

Kickoff Show: Intercontinental Title: Baron Corbin vs. Dean Ambrose

Ambrose is defending and I have no idea why this was on the Kickoff Show. Corbin crushed Ambrose underneath a forklift to set this up, giving us the hilarious visual of the referees trying to LIFT IT UP despite the key being in the ignition. They waste no time in fighting to the floor with Dean getting the better of it and heading back inside.

That earns him a hard whip to send Ambrose’s ribs into the post and give Corbin a nice big target. Or 24 of them in this case. A choke shove puts Dean down for two and Baron whips him into the barricade for good measure. We hit the chinlock for a few moments before Dean avoids a charge to send Corbin shoulder first into the post. Corbin avoids the top rope elbow and blocks Dirty Deeds for good measure. That earns him a trip to the floor but Baron knocks him out of the air on a slingshot dive.

The top rope elbow puts Corbin down again though and Dean gets two off a swinging neckbreaker. These two aren’t exactly clicking so far. Deep Six gives Corbin two and works on the ribs a bit more. The Rebound Lariat runs Baron over again but he’s right back with a powerbomb to stay on the ribs. That’s about it for Corbin though as Dean jumps up and hits Dirty Deeds to retain at 10:44.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one but the bigger issue was with the ending, as Baron winning the title would have made the most sense. Making it even worse was the fact that Baron won a street fight non-title rematch two days later but none of that matters as the Superstar Shakeup changed everything a week later. The match was nothing to see either as they didn’t go into the brawl that would have suited them best.

And now on the main show, which is FIVE HOURS AND TEN MINUTES LONG. Sweet goodness and they wonder why it’s hard to make new fans.

Tinashe, who looks like a low rent Beyonce (still very attractive though with a great voice) sings America the Beautiful. This includes the Air Force flyover, which will nearly knock you off your feet.

The opening video is about how everyone wants to come here, either as a fan or as a wrestler. This is the biggest show of the year and it is the ultimate thrill ride. The video turns into a roller coaster, starting with some historic moments and going into clips of wrestlers on tonight’s show. It’s continuing the theme and that’s a good thing when so many of these shows only have a loose theme at best. Ignore the fans cheering for Miz and AJ Styles and booing the heck out of Roman Reigns of course.

Here are your hosts for the evening: the New Day, in Final Fantasy inspired gear, with Kofi riding in on their bicycle powered ice cream cart. I still have one major question: HOW DID THEY NOT HAVE ICE CREAM FOR SALE??? They teased that for weeks and NOTHING. I was looking forward to it but for some reason it just never happened. After some dancing and gyrating, Xavier says there were a lot of options to host the show. Fans: “WOO!” It was your boys the NEW DAY who got the call though and they get to tell us about all the action that we’ll be seeing tonight.

It’s time to officially pulls their levers (making Kofi and Xavier cringe) and Big E. starts sending the smiling glances over to Woods as he freaks out. This was just after the sex tape fiasco, which was hinted at but never mentioned on WWE TV. In other words, this was a nice little inside joke for the fans while not giving away anything that would be un-PG. Well done and the way this needed to be handled. New Day’s level of rock is confirmed and that’s it, wrapping up this year’s installment of an unnecessary addition to the Wrestlemania card.

We recap AJ Styles babysitting Shane McMahon. AJ lost the Smackdown World Title to John Cena at the Royal Rumble and Daniel Bryan/Shane put him in the Elimination Chamber instead of giving him a one on one rematch for the title. That’s not cool with AJ, so he beat up Shane to set up this year’s “Shane can totally wrestle if you give him one of the best performers in the world” match. They’ve attacked each other a few times each since with Shane’s punches somehow getting a little worse since last year.

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Shane’s kids are at ringside because what would Wrestlemania be without them? AJ isn’t interested in throwing punches so a quick standing switch sends Shane into the ropes. A headlock and snapmare have Shane down as AJ is toying with him to start. Shane gets in some armdrags and takes Styles down for a rollup, giving us some frustration to send AJ outside.

Back in and AJ punches him in the face as it turns into a boxing match. You know you don’t have to ask Shane to do that twice so we let the suck fly, followed by an elbow to AJ’s face. One heck of a baseball slide sends Shane over the announcers’ table as control goes hard to Styles. Back in and a knee drop rocks Shane again but of course he can shake off the Phenomenal Blitz.

The Phenomenal Forearm is broken up and Shane starts his dance that was stupid back in the 90s so today it’s awesome (like everything in the Attitude Era). An Angle Slam gets two on AJ but he’s right back with the Calf Crusher. Shane reverses into a rear naked choke, a cross armbreaker and something like the Rings of Saturn. He trains MMA you see. AJ shrugs them off and drops Shane again but the springboard 450 is countered into a triangle choke. That’s reversed into a one armed Styles Clash, and of course Shane is up at two.

They slug it out and the fans are entirely behind AJ, even more than you might have expected them to be. I know he’s going to be the favorite coming in but this star treatment of Shane is making it even worse. The ref gets bumped (well duh) and it’s trashcan time. AJ loads up his own Coast to Coast but Shane throws the can at him (with AJ having to pull up on the dive, making it look horrible). Phillips: “AJ has stepped into Shane’s world now!” You mean high flying wrestling?

Shane’s Coast to Coast gets two and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. The big elbow misses but of course Shane is fine enough to counter the Phenomenal Forearm into a Maiavia Hurricane. That’s not enough from Shane though as he gets to try the shooting star, which only hits mat. The Phenomenal Forearm connects to finally put Shane away at 20:31.

Rating: B. Well that was Shane, with some Shane on the side and then more Shane to wrap it up. AJ looked awesome but that’s all he supposed to be. This was all about Shane getting to counter and hang with AJ, which doesn’t do Styles any good. A 40+ year old who doesn’t wrestle shouldn’t be hanging with a guy who was World Champion less than three months ago. But hey, Shane, right?

James Ellsworth is having issues working out so Ric Flair comes in to give him a Snickers. Then Ellsworth becomes Charlotte. Uh, yeah.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens. Their friendship had been having some issues of late so Jericho put together the Festival of Friendship, an over the top celebration of all things Owens and Jericho. At the end of it, Owens turns on Jericho and beat the heck out of him. Jericho came back and cost him the Universal Title at Fastlane so Owens is coming for Jericho’s Universal Title. The question became could Owens win without Jericho and now we get the chance to find out.

US Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens

Owens is challenging. Jericho’s entrance brings back the countdown for a nice touch. Throw in the light up scarf and a big List of Jericho on the stage and this is advantage Chris. They slug it out to start with the Walls going on less than thirty seconds in. That sends Owens bailing to the floor and a top rope forearm to the head drops Owens back inside. Owens kicks him in the face and hammers away to take over.

We hit the chinlock, with some horribly obvious spot calling, followed by the backsplash for two. They head outside for the third time with Jericho backdropping his way out of the apron powerbomb. Jericho chops away and gets two off a super hurricanrana but gets clotheslined down. The frog splash misses, the Lionsault hits knees, and the Swanton hits knees as well to give us a slow down stretch.

Now the Lionsault connects for a delayed two but Owens gets in his own Walls of Jericho. A rope is grabbed so Owens tries the Cannonball, only to be reversed into the Walls. Kevin grabs the rope for the break and is right back with the Pop Up Powerbomb for two. Another Pop Up Powerbomb is countered into the Codebreaker but Owens touches the rope with one finger for the save. That’s a sweet heel touch. Owens rolls outside and superkicks the knee, setting up the apron powerbomb to give him the pin and the title at 16:46.

Rating: C+. Not bad but they never cranked up the violence that you would have expected after seeing the Festival of Friendship. These two should have been ready to destroy each other and instead it’s just a match with Owens working the ribs and looking for a powerbomb. They accomplished the goal of making Owens look like he can win on his own, but this isn’t the way they should have gone about it.

We recap the Raw Women’s Title match. Charlotte and Sasha Banks had raised the women’s division to entirely new levels and Charlotte needed a new challenger. Enter Bayley, who won the title on Raw in a big surprise, completely defeating the purpose of her character and leaving her with nothing to do. This problem would plague her for the next year and still does to this day. Nia Jax was added to the other three because you need to have as many people in Wrestlemania matches as possible.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax vs. Bayley

Bayley is defending under elimination rules. The tube men are at ringside for a special change of pace. Sasha rides in on the back of a chauffeured car because that’s what Sasha does. Charlotte gets a crazy amount of pyro, making her look even more like a star than usual. Everyone goes after Nia to start but she wrecks them in increasingly short order. A Banzai Drop crushes Bayley and Nia throws Charlotte off the apron onto both Bayley and Sasha. There’s something about people being thrown around like weapons.

All three get together to go after Nia with Sasha wisely grabbing the leg to keep her in place. Charlotte boots Nia in the face for a double German suplex for two in a painful looking crash. Nia is back up and tries a second Banzai, only to get TripleBombed out of the corner for the elimination at 4:08.

As usual, Nia chokes in the big match because that’s just how she rolls. Charlotte pulls Bayley to the floor and it’s Sasha hitting a flip dive to take the champ down. As you might expect, it’s the corkscrew moonsault from the top to take Bayley and Sasha down again in a huge crash.

Back in and Natural Selection is countered into a failed Bank Statement attempt. Instead Charlotte gets two off a backbreaker and rips off a turnbuckle pad in frustration. Sasha’s top rope double knees are good for two of her own and the Bank Statement goes on. Sasha goes with a rollup and the kickout sends her face first into the buckle for the elimination at 8:10.

Bayley comes back in and gets her knee rammed into the exposed buckle. The moonsault, with the wind blowing Charlotte’s hair around, only hits mat to give Bayley a near fall. Charlotte is fine enough to go after the knee and grab the Figure Eight. Bayley gets to the rope so Charlotte takes her into the Tree of Woe, only to get backdropped from the top in a big crash. The big elbow is enough to retain the title at 12:04.

Rating: D. Why can’t they get these big matches right? This was completely backwards with Nia being thrown in there at the last minute and lasting all of four minutes. Then it’s Bayley not really overcoming the odds and just pinning Charlotte after shrugging off some of the offense. It’s not some come from behind win or a big moment, but really just a match where Charlotte happened to lose.

Video on the Hall of Fame induction ceremony. Hearing Jim Cornette’s voice in WWE is just wrong.

Diamond Dallas Page. Nice reaction and WELL deserved just for his stuff with Hall and Roberts alone.

Rock N Roll Express. WAY overdue.

Rick Rude. See the Rock N Roll Express.

Teddy Long. I defy you to not smile at this.

Eric LeGrand. Warrior Award and that’s fine.

Beth Phoenix. Fine enough if a female entrant is required.

Kurt Angle. Yep. Moving on.

Support the Boys and Girls Club! Fair request actually.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

No real story here as this is they’ve just been feuding and it’s time for a title match. Anderson and Gallows are defending and this is a ladder match because we have to have one. Enzo and Cass’ speech is short this time as they say they’re climbing every rung to win the titles. We’re ready to go….and here’s New Day. Yeah remember them?

Anyway they’re in wrestling gear here but first, an announcement. This is now a FATAL FOUR WAY with one more team to be added. That would be the HARDY BOYZ, making a shocking return and giving us a legitimate Wrestlemania moment. Before the music hit, I stood up and said “they wouldn’t”, which was aided as I couldn’t see that New Day was in ring gear. Amazing moment here and the twenty six million YouTube views suggest that it’s quite the popular idea. Cole says thinks are about to be BROKEN and Matt does the DELETE pose.

It’s a brawl to start (as it should be) and the Hardys waste no time with Poetry in Motion to Gallows. Enzo and Cass are taken down as well as the fans are entire enamored with the Hardys all over again. A Whisper in the Wind takes both Sheamus and Cesaro down and it’s time for the first ladder. Jeff goes up but it’s Gallows making a pretty easy save. Cesaro comes back in and climbs onto Gallows’ shoulders for a double stomp onto Anderson’s ribs. Well that worked.

This time it’s Enzo and Cass coming in, just to make sure that everyone gets their turn in you see. That goes nowhere so the Hardys bridge the ladders between the ring and the apron but Cesaro and Sheamus slam them together. With a little too much Sheamus on offense, Cass launches Enzo over the ladders like a cannonball to take him down.

Back in and Sheamus hits the ten forearms to Gallows while Cesaro Swings Anderson. Despite what Cole thinks, that’s not exactly working together. We hear about the Tag Team Titles not changing hands at Wrestlemania in SIXTEEN YEARS (that’s inexcusable) until Sheamus Brogue Kicks the heck out of Cass. Enzo shoves the ladder over to drop Gallows and Sheamus and goes up, sending Graves into hysterics over the horrible possibilities.

Sheamus and Gallows come back in for the save but don’t bother to knock him off the ladder. Instead it’s Anderson climbing the ladder and knocking Cesaro into the ladder. There’s a Magic Killer to Cesaro but Matt hits them both with a Twist of Fate, including a big one off of the ladder to Anderson. Jeff hits the required Swanton off the ladder to drive Cesaro through a bridged ladder, leaving Matt to pull the titles down at 11:05.

Rating: C+. There’s only so much you can get out of a ladder match like this with almost nothing to it other than the big Hardys return. That being said, they absolutely got the ending right as there was no other way to go here. Enzo and Cass weren’t going to work after something as special as the Hardys showing up so don’t even try. There wasn’t much to this in the way of high spots either, but this was ALL about Matt and Jeff, as it should have been.

Jimmy Fallon is here.

We recap the Miz/Maryse vs. John Cena/Nikki Bella, which is mostly about Nikki and Cena teaming together for the first time ever. The idea is that Cena won’t marry Nikki so Miz and Maryse are better, meaning we’re just waiting on Cena to pop the question here. In the show stealing moment of the year though, Miz and Maryse did some parody videos of Cena and Nikki and Total Divas/Bellas, giving us some of the funniest things WWE has ever done.

They nailed the ridiculous nature of the shows to perfection and made Miz look like the guy who should be ready to break through every ceiling above her. Oh and Maryse as Nikki Bella: sweet GOODNESS that worked on about a million levels. Finally though, a year later with Miz and Maryse now as parents, Cena’s jokes about Miz “firing blanks” are pretty much dead.

Jerry Lawler is on commentary.

Nikki Bella/John Cena vs. Maryse/The Miz

Al Roker is guest ring announcer for absolutely no reason whatsoever other than having a celebrity appearance. This is Maryse’s first match nearly six years and she doesn’t look like she’s lost a step. Cena and Nikki run down the ramp and we see a wide shot for a cool visual. Cena’s mom is in the front row and he seems shocked to see her, which would be a heck of a surprise.

The women start and there’s no contact for a minute so let’s bring in the guys instead. Miz poses on the ropes and then bails to the floor to start a chase. Back in and Miz finally stomps away as we finally make contact nearly two minutes in. Maryse gets in a poke to the eye so Miz can fire off a left hand. Cena and Nikki have had no offense so far. The fans are very pleased with Miz’s beating of Cena, mainly because they realize how awesome those Total Bellas parodies were.

Miz misses the running clothesline in the corner but Maryse breaks up the hot tag attempt by pulling Nikki off the apron. A DDT gives Miz two and he slowly does Daniel Bryan’s pose (How amazing is it that the match could ACTUALLY HAPPEN?). The YES Kicks keep Cena rocked but Miz makes the mistake of telling Nikki that she can’t see him.

A big slap puts Miz on the floor and a diving tag brings in Nikki. Some bad forearms to Maryse’s arms (Shane could do better than that) don’t do much damage so Nikki runs Miz over instead. Back in and Nikki’s big forearm sets up stereo Five Knuckle Shuffles. The AA and a Rack Attack 2.0 give us a double pin at 9:38.

Rating: D-. What in the world was that? Miz beat Cena up for about eight minutes and then it was hot tag Nikki to put the villains away Hogan style. After all the work and amazing promos, this is Miz’s Wrestlemania reward. I’m so glad this is what they went with instead of Cena vs. Undertaker, which was likely possible at this show. But hey, Total Divas and Total Bellas got a plot out of it.

Post match Cena says this is what Nikki wanted when she was rehabbing her neck. He tells a downright creepy story about Nikki being groggy before going inf or surgery. Apparently Cena asked if Nikki knew he would marry her one day. She said yes, and today is that day. Cena proposes and we get the big moment as she says yes. I’m SO glad this is what Cena, in the final few years that he has in WWE, is spending one of them doing this. It’s a sweet moment, but my goodness do this on Total Bellas where the fans want to see it.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. HHH, in another dumb story. So Rollins was HHH’s big ace in the hole a few years back and everything was all evil and great. Then Rollins tore his ACL and had to vacate the World Title, which HHH took as not being good enough to be the top guy. Let me repeat that: HHH said that leg issues were signs that someone wasn’t good enough to be the man in WWE. HHH then cost the returning Rollins the title to turn him face but now it’s time for revenge with a fired up Rollins wanting to burn the place down to destroy HHH.

Seth Rollins vs. HHH

Anything goes and, as usual, HHH gets the coolest entrance of the night with a big motorcycle and a police escort, plus Stephanie as a CRAZY HOT biker chick. Seriously, I know she can be irritating but she can rock the heck out of some leather pants. He gets the biggest entrance every year and it takes up a bunch of the spotlight but I can live with it if she’s in outfits like that.

Rollins’ entrance involves holding up a torch and touching it to the ground, sending digital flames down the ramp. I get the burn it down thing but it’s rather lame, along with coming after the really cool entrance. Well done again HHH, as he continues to be smarter than most wrestlers today.

They waste no time in slugging it out with Rollins getting the better of it (therefore I must remind you: HHH once won a slugout with modern day Brock Lesnar) to knock HHH outside. A dragon screw legwhip takes Rollins down by the knee that wasn’t hurt in the first place. Rollins shrugs it off and punches him away, followed by an enziguri back inside. The suicide dive sends HHH into the barricade and it’s already time for the announcers’ table. As usual, Rollins tries a Pedigree onto the table but gets countered with a DDT which doesn’t break the table.

HHH cranks up the violence with a chair to the knee before bridging Rollins’ knee between the ring and the table so he can drive his own knee into Rollins’. Back in and the slow knee work continues, because that’s how HHH loves to work on a show this big. Rollins tries the sunset bomb but hurts his knee all over again. It’s fine enough to hit the Buckle Bomb and a hard whip sends HHH over the corner to the floor. With HHH staggered, Rollins goes up top (Graves: “He’s screwed if he hits this or not.”) and scores with a high crossbody to the floor.

Since it’s an anything goes match, Rollins loads up a pair of chairs and a table on the floor instead of just bashing HHH with the chair. A frog splash to the back keeps HHH down but he kicks the knee out to cut Rollins off again. HHH takes forever to get up top though and gets a chair pelted at his head, setting up the superplex into the Falcon Arrow for two. You know, on the bad knee.

Stephanie breaks up the Phoenix Splash by pulling the knee onto the ropes and we hit a reverse Figure Four. That’s reversed into a Gargano Escape of all things but HHH goes smart by punching him in the knee. The reverse Figure Four goes on outside so Rollins reaches underneath the ring to find weapons. Naturally this includes the sledgehammer but HHH lets the hold go.

Back in and Rollins’ knee is fine enough for a low superkick to the face, followed by an enziguri to really hammer the point home. Stephanie takes the hammer away from Rollins though and a Pedigree gives HHH two. The fans barely even reacted to that one and I can’t say I blame them.

HHH channels his inner CM Punk and loads up a super Pedigree but gets backdropped down (already done by Bayley earlier). Now the Phoenix Splash gets two but neither can hit a Pedigree. Instead HHH hits him in the knee but walks into a superkick, which knocks Stephanie off the apron and through a table. That wakes the fans WAY up just in time for the Pedigree to give Rollins the pin at 25:25.

Rating: B-. This is an interesting one I was bored out of my mind watching it live but it flies by watching it back. That being said, the constant knee work got very dull, especially when it wasn’t even Rollins’ bad knee. As usual, the Stephanie bump got by far the strongest reaction of the night because it’s something you don’t see very often. It’s not a bad match at all but you EASILY could have chopped off ten minutes and no one would have missed a thing.

Pitbull performs the theme song and eats up way too much time.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt for the Smackdown World Title. Orton joined the Wyatt Family after becoming tired of being beaten down by the team. Then he won the Royal Rumble and promised to never cash in the title shot on new champion Wyatt. It wound up being a ruse though and Orton used his newfound access to the Wyatt Family compound to destroy the whole place. Then Bray poured Sister Abigail’s ashes over himself and gained her powers as this story got REALLY stupid. There was also something about Luke Harper nearly becoming #1 contender that went nowhere but warrants a quick mention.

Smackdown World Title: Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging and has a viper go down the ramp, which he himself called stupid. We get the Big Match Intros and Orton takes him down with a Thesz press and some right hands. They head to the floor for more right hands but Bray goes caveman with a running headbutt back inside. And then the lights go out (which I thought was a blackout) until the mat is covered with a projection of maggots. We’re about two minutes into the match and this is already in the pantheon of dumbest ideas ever.

Bray runs him over again and this time it’s worms on the mat. The referee jumps out of the ring, possibly because he wants to go work for a sensible company like TNA. A Rock Bottom into a backsplash gives Bray two but Sister Abigail is countered into a rollup for two. I mean, it doesn’t matter as they’ve completely lost the fans after that stupid, STUPID idea but never let that stop WWE.

They head outside again with Bray diving off the apron and straight into a dropkick. Sister Abigail into the barricade drops Orton again but he’s back up with an RKO to knock Bray silly on the floor. That’s only good for two back inside and Sister Abigail is countered into the backbreaker. Orton’s hanging DDT looks to set up the RKO but this time Sister Abigail connects for two. But hang on because let’s hit those roaches to complete the trio of stupid! Orton is finally done with all this nonsense and hits the RKO for the pin and the title at 10:13.

Rating: F. You are the winter, fall and spring. You are the sun that summertime brings. You are the stars in the nighttime sky. You are my girl and I’m your guy. You got me all tied up in knots and I’m lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m just lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m lovin’ you lots and lots.

That doesn’t make sense? Neither does what we just saw. Moving on.

The pilots from the flyover are here. That’s kind of cool.

We recap the Universal Title match, which all started because of a video game. Goldberg came back at Survivor Series to face Brock Lesnar in a rematch of the nightmare that was Wrestlemania XX. In a shocker, Goldberg won in about a minute and a half. Then it was decided that Goldberg could win the title again. He went on to eliminate Brock from the Royal Rumble and then won the Universal Title in about thirty seconds at Fastlane. Lesnar needed to defeat Goldberg once and for all so we’re having the match for the title tonight. This is all narrated by Paul Heyman, who talks about fantasies coming to an end in a nice touch.

Here’s the thing: you could do this same story without the title. Have Lesnar put up his career to get one more shot at Goldberg (it’s not like there was any doubt on the winner here anyway) so let us have the original plan: Owens dropping the title to Jericho (who never won the World Title as a face) and then Lesnar winning it the next month. Nah. We need GOLDBERG winning the title in a nostalgia moment for whatever reason.

Universal Title: Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Goldberg is defending and gets the long walk to the ring which might as well be the long walk to the gallows. Lesnar wastes no time and hits three German suplexes in nineteen seconds. In a great visual, the camera is on Lesnar when Goldberg cuts him down with a spear. A second spear sends Lesnar bailing and the third spear takes Lesnar through the barricade. That’s the first MINUTE of this match as they’re certainly starting fast.

Back in and both finishers are escaped, setting up another spear to Lesnar. The Jackhammer gets two, making Lesnar the second person to ever kick out (the other being Hogan, who only did it because of a missed cue). That means another spear (Heyman: “HE’S IN POSITION AGAIN!”) but this time Lesnar leapfrogs him and Goldberg hits the buckles. More suplexes (make it ten total) set up the F5 to officially conquer Goldberg at 4:47.

Rating: B. This was PERFECT for what they had to work with. Goldberg wasn’t going to be out there for a long match (he didn’t in his prime either) and they went with the right path. This was as action packed of a nearly five minute match as all you could have done. That first spear looked awesome and Goldberg gets to go out on his big moment. I’m pleased, though not as much as Goldberg, who probably made a ton of money for less than ten minutes combined of wrestling time in his comeback.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Naomi vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Alexa is defending and this is the most thrown together match that I can remember in a good while. They’re also rushing through the entrances due to the time issues. You know, because NOW they care about time issues. Naomi is the hometown girl and MY GOODNESS the Glow entrance is a sight to behold in a stadium. There are no tags of course so it’s a big brawl to start.

Naomi gets sent to the floor for a double suplex from Natalya and Carmella. Back in and Becky kicks the two of them down but James Ellsworth (Remember that?) grabs Becky’s foot to take over. Bliss breaks up a cover and screams at Carmella to get out of her ring. The DDT gets two on Natalya but Becky breaks it up this time, only to have Ellsworth come in. No Chin Music is countered into a Bexploder and it’s Naomi coming back in this time.

Naomi slingshots in to sunset flip Natalya, who German suplexes Becky at the same time. Speaking of the same time, Natalya tries a double Sharpshooter on Carmella and Naomi but can’t get the legs up. Well, not surprising, but it’s so bad that the camera cuts to her back. Naomi comes back in for a Rear View to Bliss and a big dive to take everyone out. Back in and Naomi’s reverse Rings of Saturn makes Bliss tap for the title at 5:33.

Rating: D. The timing issues KILLED this and there’s no way around it. Much like the ladder match earlier, there’s nothing you can do when you have five minutes and six people in a match. Naomi winning the title back is cool, but I still have no idea why her winning it back in her hometown is supposed to be some huge deal. Yeah it’s cool, but it’s not like this is some great moment.

Wrestlemania XXXIV is in New Orleans. Those songs will drive you crazy by the end of the weekend.

New Day comes out to thank the fans for the record attendance of 75,245. The team is still funny but egads they could have been cut out of this whole thing and not been missed.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Undertaker. Reigns eliminated him from the Rumble and now we have a match to determine who is the real Big Dog.

Jim Ross is out to do commentary for the main event. That’s even more impressive when you consider his wife died days before this show.

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

No holds barred, first announced before the entrances. Reigns is booed out of the stadium, as has become a custom. In a smart move, Undertaker rises from the middle of the ramp (with a cool visual of smoke building up and clearing to reveal him standing there). I completely missed this as I was looking at the stage and then glanced down to the ring and saw him climbing the steps.

Undertaker slugs away in the corner to start and knocks Reigns to the floor. Back in and Reigns knocks him over the top as well, with Undertaker landing on his feet. Reigns hammers him down to take over and they head outside so this can be more of a brawl, which is the only way to go. The apron dropkick (to a standing Undertaker) puts Undertaker down again but he wins a slugout back inside. Reigns hits him in the face and Undertaker just looks mad.

Snake Eyes and the big boot set up the legdrop for two. The threat of a chokeslam sends Reigns outside again and this time the apron dropkick is punched out of the air. Another dropkick staggers Undertaker but it’s a chokeslam onto the announcers’ table. They climb onto the other tables and it’s a spear to drive Undertaker through (almost in a running spinebuster) for the double knockout.

Reigns is the only one back in….and Undertaker sits up. Back in and Reigns does the corner clotheslines into the corner right hands, meaning the Last Ride (an AWFUL one at that with little impact and more Undertaker dropping Reigns than slamming him down). It’s chair time but Undertaker takes it away and beats him down instead. A quick Superman Punch knocks Undertaker into the ropes but another is countered into a chokeslam onto the chair.

The Tombstone gets two and the fans, who are supposed to be smart at Wrestlemania, seem shocked at the kickout. Off the first Tombstone. In a Wrestlemania match. Who’s the smart one here? Another Tombstone is loaded up but this time Reigns backflips….and just can’t lift Undertaker for the counter. They try a few more times but just stop for the sake of embarrassment with Reigns trying a Superman Punch instead.

The spear connects but Undertaker is fine enough to put on Hell’s Gate. The rope is reached for a break (erg) and Reigns unloads with the chair. Another spear gets another two and another spear gets another two and another Superman Punch (Undertaker sits up and falls over) sets up another spear to give Undertaker his second Wrestlemania loss at 22:57. That last sequence took nearly five minutes.

Rating: D+. It’s not terrible, but Undertaker looked like an old man who should have hung it up a few years ago. The problem here was the crowd being completely dead and it showed really badly. There’s only so much energy you can have in an academic match at the end of a seven hour show. Reigns winning makes complete sense but it was a bad match (the botches and CRAZY amount of time spent standing around didn’t do it any favors) and there’s no way around that.

Reigns gets the big pyro display behind him as he stands on the ramp (great shot) but we’re not done yet. Undertaker slowly sits up and we go to a bunch of replays. Back to live and it’s Undertaker standing in the ring with the hat and coat on. I use that term loosely as it looks like Mark Callaway standing there dressed as Undertaker. For the first time, it seems like we’re seeing the real person instead of the character, which is a MAJOR change for him.

He looks around to the crowd, takes off his gloves, coat and hat and folds them up in the ring. With the fans applauding, he goes outside, kisses Michelle McCool, and walks up the ramp. Undertaker stops, looks back one more time, raises the fist, and lowers down through the ramp, fist still in the air, to end the show with the gong sounding one more time. There was no commentary for the last ten minutes, without even a goodbye (appropriate here).

That’s about as perfect of a sendoff as WWE has ever done. It was emotional, it felt special, and it came off like the real thing. Undertaker is the last vestige of that older generation and him breaking character for the first time ever and leaving is incredible to see. It’s why I don’t want to see him wrestle again and why it makes me sad to think that he will. Incredible stuff, and Thank You Taker.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s no way around it: this show is way way way way way way way WAY too long. I got through an hour of the show a few days back (you know I’m not watching this in one sitting) and looked down at the bar in near horror of how little space I had covered. Five hours, plus TWO HOURS of a Kickoff Show is just too much, especially when there’s stuff to be cut. What could be cut? Well off the top of my head:

AJ vs. Shane (move AJ to ANYTHING else and drop Shane) entirely or at least cut it down by about eight minutes

Corbin vs. Ambrose (I know it’s the Intercontinental Title but on a show this huge, it’s understandable)

Smackdown Women’s Title (it’s just nothing and felt like total filler)

Five to ten minutes each off of Reigns vs. Undertaker and HHH vs. Rollins (those combine for nearly fifty minutes total)

Pitbull

AT LEAST get this down to four and a half hours of main show. That can’t be too much to ask, right?

Other than the timing issues though, the show is mostly solid. There’s a ton of good stuff up until the mixed tag and then things start to fall apart. The Universal Title match was as perfect as it was going to be get but there’s just so much bad around it (Bray vs. Orton, Reigns vs. Undertaker, HHH vs. Rollins in that match that is still going on somewhere, with HHH still working the knee) that the good is dragged down.

At the end of the day, it all comes back to the timing issues as there’s almost no way to make a show this long work. It’s too much to sit through and it becomes a chore at the end. Just cut this down by a good hour (or two) and things are much better, but bigger is better for WWE and that’s not changing anytime soon. As it is, the show works more than it misses but it’s still not a classic by any means.

Ratings Comparison

Neville vs. Austin Aries

Original: A-

2018 Redo: B

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

Dean Ambrose vs. Baron Corbin

Original: C+

2018 Redo: C-

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Kevin Owens vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Sasha Banks vs. Bayley vs. Charlotte vs. Nia Jax

Original: C-

2018 Redo: D

Hardy Boyz vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

John Cena/Nikki Bella vs. The Miz/Maryse

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

HHH vs. Seth Rollins

Original: C+

2018 Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Original: F

2018 Redo: F

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Naomi vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Original: D-

2018 Redo: D

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

Original: D+

2018 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Yeah I overrated a lot of this the first time around. It’s good, but not that good.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/04/07/wrestlemania-xxxiii-a-long-wait-for-a-long-show-with-a-long-ramp/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXXII (2017 Edition): Hitting One Heck of a Wall

Wrestlemania XXXII
Date: April 3, 2016
Location: AT&T Stadium, Arlington, Texas
Attendance: 101,763
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

As we get ready for the pre-show matches, the place might be 10% full at this point as there was some confusion in opening the gates. There were no lines and it was just a sea of humanity trying to get inside.

Pre-Show: Ryback vs. Kalisto

Ryback plants him off a headlock and easily throws the champ outside. Kalisto gets in a quick bulldog for two but the kickout sends him outside. Some double knees to the chest get the same result and Ryback gets to show off by gorilla pressing Kalisto up the steps and back inside. We take a break and come back with Kalisto taking a hard elbow to the jaw for two.

Team Total Divas vs. Team B.A.D. and Blonde

Total Divas: Natalya, Brie Bella, Paige, Alicia Fox, Eva Marie

B.A.D. and Blonde: Naomi, Lana, Summer Rae, Tamina, Emma

Post match Nikki Bella comes out in her neck brace in what is supposed to be some big moment.

Usos vs. Dudley Boyz

Post match the Dudleyz load up some tables but get splashed through them instead. Cool visual if nothing else.

Fifth Harmony sings a very nice rendition of America the Beautiful.

Inter-continental Title: Kevin Owens vs. The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Zack Ryder vs. Stardust vs. Sin Cara vs. Sami Zayn

Cara hits the big dive to put Stardust through the ladder, leaving Owens and Zayn to slug it out above the ring. Sami gets the better of it and hits the half and half suplex to drop Owens head first into a ladder (sick looking landing). That lets Sami go up until Miz shoves him over but this time Miz takes too long going up, earning himself a big shove off from Ryder, who climbs the ladder for the huge upset at 15:24.

AJ Styles vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho drives him into the corner to start and the AJ STYLES chants are already going nice and strong. Styles gets in a hurricanrana and a snappy armdrag before sending Jericho outside. That should mean a slingshot dive but Jericho dropkicks him out of the air to take over. Back in and a neckbreaker sets up a dragon sleeper for a change of pace.

AJ tries to fight back but gets pulled down into the Walls for some good old fashioned ASK HIM/AHHHH exchanges. A rope is grabbed so AJ can hit the moonsault into a reverse DDT for two. Both guys head to the corner for a super sitout gordbuster and one heck of a crash. The Pele is countered into a Walls attempt but AJ reverses that into the Calf Crusher.

The Styles Clash is broken up and a Codebreaker gets a delayed two (with Cole making sure to say the near fall was due to the delay in a nice touch). For a change of pace, Jericho loads up AJ for the Styles Clash but gets planted face first for two instead. A rollup exchange sets up the real Styles Clash for two and the springboard 450 gets the same. With nothing else left, AJ heads to the apron and loads up the Phenomenal Forearm, only to have Jericho shove the referee away and catch Styles with the Codebreaker for the pin at 17:08.

New Day vs. League of Nations

Dean Ambrose vs. Brock Lesnar

Anything goes and Heyman gives Brock a big, over the top intro. JBL gives us a good example of trying to be too smart by calling Lesnar a former NWA Champion (assuming he means NCAA), which of course he never won. Brock hits the first suplex inside of ten seconds and the huge video screen above the ring kept count (It had been all over the place all night with unicorns for the New Day and various three camera shot replays. In other words, it was annoying in a hurry.).

Hall of Fame time with a pretty good class:

Godfather (So completely out of place here.)

Stan Hansen (How was he not in already?)

Joan Lunden (Warrior Award, which seems to have been forgotten this year.)

Fabulous Freebirds (You could argue they were the headliners.)

Snoop Dogg (Harmless. Not exactly PG but harmless.)

Sting (Only entrance and the loudest reaction.)

Everyone trades rollups to start in a fast and pretty athletic sequence until Charlotte kicks Becky in the face. That earns a nice round of applause and you can tell the women are ready tonight. A hurricanrana sends Charlotte across the ring and Sasha throws in an Eddie dance. They botch (not bad) a sunset flip/German suplex spot before Charlotte it sent outside, leaving Sasha to elbow Becky in the face.

Charlotte poses and gets some pyro to really make this special.

The Cell is lowered for the 33rd time in WWE history. That stat kind of pulls things back a bit no?

Shane McMahon vs. Undertaker

Rating: D-. WAY too long here with a match that should have been a glorified squash (which this was) that ran only about half this long. The idea that Shane could hang in there with Undertaker under these or any circumstances (including a bunch of run-ins, which never happened), is a combination of insulting and stupid.

The pre-show panel chats for a bit.

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Konnor gets rid of Page a few seconds later as this is already pretty dull stuff. The yet to be official Golden Truth eliminates Konnor and Tatanka goes on a warpath that no one was asking for. Corbin tosses Tatanka to no reaction and Kane backdrops Swagger out. The Social Outcasts of all people clean house and get rid of Goldust and Truth. We get a victory lap until Kane and Corbin get rid of Rose and Axel.

Wrestlemania XXXIII is in Orlando.

The Rock vs. Erick Rowan

Rock Bottom, six seconds. Again, I saw this called Rock burying the Wyatts. You know, because people are worried about ERICK ROWAN needing protection.

WWE World Title: Roman Reigns vs. HHH

Rating: D. And a lot of that is just for having the guts to go out there and do a match this boring in this spot on this show. This match was twelve minutes of HHH working on the arm and then getting into the main event style that went exactly where we knew it was going. The lack of drama or really anything interesting (save for that Stephanie spear) killed this and there was no recovering given how long the thing ran.

A quick celebration sets up the traditional long music video to wrap things up.

Ratings Comparison

Zack Ryder vs. Stardust vs. Sin Cara vs. Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens vs. The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler

Original: B

Redo: B

AJ Styles vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

Redo: B

New Day vs. League of Nations

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Brock Lesnar vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: D+

Redo: C+

Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch vs. Sasha Banks

Original: B+

Redo: A-

Shane McMahon vs. Undertaker

Original: D

Redo: D-

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D

Redo: D

The Rock vs. Erick Rowan

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

HHH vs. Roman Reigns

Original: D

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D

Oh yeah I was still feeling the in-person vibe when I watched this back the first time. A C- is WAY too generous.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/04/08/wrestlemania-xxxii-strap-yourselves-in-this-is-a-long-one/

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