New Column: Way Down Younder At WrestleMania

A lot happened at Wrestlemania and some of it deserves extra attention.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/way-down-yonder-wrestlemania/

Wrestlemania XXXIV Preview – Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon

Snap, crackle or pop.

Kurt Angle/Ronda Rousey vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon

Please don’t do it, please don’t do it, please don’t do it. PLEASE don’t let McMahon be competitive with Rousey here. You don’t have a chance like this ever day (or every few years even) and the last thing that WWE or Rousey needs is to have to sell for McMahon, no matter how great her trainer says she is or how AWESOME it is that she works out at night and has three kids and is a media queen who got where she is entirely by herself or whatever her latest campaign is between receiving all those totally awesome awards.

Again, I’m going to give WWE the benefit of the doubt and assume that they won’t manage to screw up what should be unscrewupable. Rousey can be beaten down for a bit (preferably by HHH) but this match needs to end with Rousey grabbing McMahon’s arm and snapping it like a twig. That’s what this story has been calling for and that’s where it needs to go. Angle vs. HHH is irrelevant. Just give us the Rousey that can be a big deal and go from there.

Main Event – April 5, 2018: I’m Ready

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: April 5, 2018
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Nigel McGuinness, Vic Joseph

I’m not sure what to expect from a Main Event designed to make me want to see Wrestlemania. Odds are there’s going to be some time spent on original matches between people who won’t even make it into the battle royals, but that’s never stopped this show before. This should be recap heavy so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Cedric Alexander/Mustafa Ali vs. Tony Nese/Ariya Daivari

Did I put in 205 Live by mistake? Of note, all of their name graphics point out that they are cruiserweights. Not 205 Live wrestlers, but cruiserweights. Nese whips Ali around to start but gets caught with a spinwheel kick for two. Daivari comes in and gets kicked in the face by Alexander for the same but the villains finally use some double teaming to send Ali face first into the apron.

Some stomping sets up a waistlock, followed by a running forearm for two. Another kick to the head allows the hot tag to Alexander though and it’s time to speed things up. Everything breaks down and a tornado DDT sets up the Lumbar Check to put Nese away at 5:45.

Rating: C-. Not enough time to do much here but well done on trying to use the Main Event time to actually set something up for Wrestlemania. It’s not much of a match and that’s all you could have expected, but at least they did something here. Ali vs. Alexander should be a rocking match too.

Quick clip of Cena challenging Undertaker from Raw.

Long recap of Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn.

From Smackdown.

Here’s Daniel Bryan to open the show and shockingly enough, the fans seem into him. He wastes no time in bringing out Shane McMahon for the first time in a few weeks. Shane praises Bryan for having the courage to come back and get in this ring despite everyone telling him it would never happen. He brings up having diverticulitis and a hernia thanks to Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn but just like Bryan, he’s medically cleared for Sunday.

Bryan has to apologize to Shane though, because Shane was right about Owens and Zayn all along. Shane says he was a little stubborn over the last six months. Bryan: “YOU? STUBBORN? NO!” Bryan wants a hug but Shane offers a handshake. That’s not working because they shook hands a few minutes ago and the people of Nashville want a HUG. The fans finally get their wish and Shane promises to get rid of Owens and Zayn once and for all.

From later in the night.

Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn come through the crowd (with Owens in a KO-MANIA III shirt, thankfully continuing the trend of using the old Wrestlemania logos) onto the announcers’ table. No one is stopping them tonight so they’ve got some apologies of their own. Sami apologizes to Birdie and Brie Danielson for what’s going to happen to Bryan. A YOU DESERVE IT chant started by Sami doesn’t quite catch on but the mic is cut off anyway. Shane and Bryan come out, sending Owens and Zayn bailing into the crowd. Bryan says this is the last time they’ll be on Smackdown and Shane starts the Goodbye Song.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Anderson and Gallows vs. Revival

Remember a year ago at the Raw after Wrestlemania when SAY YEAH got a huge reaction? WWE certainly doesn’t. Anderson headlocks Dawson to start but a blind tag….doesn’t do much good for Dawson, who gets armdragged down for his efforts. Gallows comes in and charges into a knee and everything breaks down in a hurry. Revival gets sent outside and we take a break. Back with the Magic Killer being broken up and the Shatter Machine ending Gallows at 6:21. Too short to rate of course and not enough time to mean anything in the first place.

We see the end of the Stephanie McMahon/HHH/Kurt Angle/Ronda Rousey sitdown on Monday. Rousey’s line about making sure Stephanie can still sign her checks was great.

From Raw.

Here are Heyman and Lesnar with wrestlers guarding the entrance. Heyman doesn’t think much of Angle’s actions tonight, including failing as Rousey’s mentor. We hear about how this Sunday is a battle between the two men who have defeated Undertaker at Wrestlemania. People think that this is going to be Roman Reigns’ coronation and Heyman respects everything about Lesnar.

However, this Sunday, Lesnar is going to pin Reigns 1-2-3 after an F5. Should an act of God happen though and Reigns win, Heyman and Lesnar will never appear on Raw again. If they’re leaving though, Brock will say goodbye from UFC but Heyman needs to say something now. You know this aura that Heyman has built up since 2002 of Lesnar being above everyone else and that no one is worthy of polishing his boots? It’s all true, because no one in the locker room can hold his jock, let alone take his title.

They give Reigns a path and it’s time for the in-ring staredown. The fans chant for Roman (remember he played college football in this town) but Lesnar bails to the floor. Lesnar grabs a chair but it gets Superman Punched into his face. Two more have Brock in trouble and a third puts him down. Reigns picks up the title and is promptly F5’d to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This is a good example of “it was what it was”. The show was all about setting up Wrestlemania and it did that well enough, but it’s not like there was anything of note going on. It was mainly recaps and hype videos and really, that’s all it should have been. I’m excited for the show, but there’s a lot that could go wrong. This did its job well enough.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – April 2, 2018: Why Reigns Isn’t So Bad This Year

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 2, 2018
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman

Should he do something? Over the last few weeks, John Cena has come off as a complete jerk to Undertaker, basically demanding that Undertaker come out of what seems to be retirement to face him. Why would Undertaker do this? Well apparently because the people want to see it and nearly thirty years in WWE isn’t enough to make them happy. Or so Cena says. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with Coach in the ring to emcee a sitdown between Stephanie McMahon (Who dances to the ring and looks like she doesn’t have a care in the world. I know she’s the boss and all that jazz, but could you PLEASE look at least a little worried? It’s Ronda Rousey, not Dana Brooke. This feels like Hollywood Hogan coming to the ring at Starrcade 1997 and that’s not a good thing), HHH, Kurt Angle and Ronda Rousey.

Stephanie mocks the fans for cheering for Rousey and HHH calls Angle’s third I (intelligence) into question. Rousey should be the biggest signing WWE could ever have and Angle is giving her a match on the biggest stage of them all. This is a whopper even for Angle and HHH needs to know why. Rousey cuts Angle off and says she’d like to know too. Why did they sign her under ulterior motives?

Stephanie says Rousey doesn’t quite get how it works around here and promises to teach her the right way after she’s broken down on Sunday. Rousey knows the format and wants her answer so Stephanie says the two of them work for her. Why did Angle cost Rousey (HHH: “And WWE. Thanks Kurt.”) millions of dollars. Angle says she’s RONDA FREAKING ROUSEY and says she’ll make Stephanie tap on Sunday.

HHH laughs it off and we get some questions from Twitter, mainly asking how big this is. Stephanie promises to give Rousey a loss in her first WWE match. Rousey asks if Stephanie is right or left handed. Stephanie: “I’m a rightie.” Rousey: “Good. I just want to make sure you can still sign my checks after I rip your arm off.”

They go for the photo op and a brawl is imminent but HHH breaks it up. Rousey chokes him down but Stephanie slowly slams her through a table. Stephanie brought the annoying here but Rousey’s comeback line (which she stumbled through at the end) wasn’t being topped. If Stephanie doesn’t tap on Sunday though (or at least lose), I don’t know what to tell you.

Bayley vs. Sonya Deville

Bayley wastes no time with a crossbody for two before Sonya goes after the arm. That earns her a takedown out of the corner but Sonya stomps on Bayley to take us to a break. Back with Bayley in a chinlock but fighting back as you might have expected. Bayley knocks her into the corner and goes up top for a high crossbody and no cover. Even Coach wants to know why that wasn’t a cover. Bayley’s running knee to the head gets two and Sonya bails to the floor. That’s not happening as Bayley throws her back in and finishes with a rollup at 9:55.

Rating: D+. Deville isn’t the most interesting character, especially now that you have Rousey as the real MMA woman on the roster. She’s fine in spots like this though and that makes for some perfectly acceptable performances. Bayley was smart for once here by throwing Sonya back in instead of letting her get regrouped with Absolution, meaning her character is actually changing a bit.

Post match the beatdown is on with Sasha Banks running in for the save. Sasha says she wants her hand raised but Bayley will have none of it. A brawl breaks out and Absolution comes back in to beat them both down.

We get a By the Numbers video on Asuka’s streak. This was done before but the numbers are updated here.

265 Wins

0 Losses

35 Women

4 Continents represented

11 Countries represented

8 Former champions submitted

523 Days as NXT Women’s Champion

7^th Longest Reign of all time

1^st Woman to be a Survivor Series sole survivor and win a Royal Rumble

29 Women defeated in the Royal Rumble

15 Former Women’s Champions in the Rumble

904 Days undefeated

Congratulations to Miz and Maryse’s daughter.

Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins

Miz is on commentary as they fight over wristlocks to start. With no one being able to get an advantage, Miz gives a heartfelt speech about how he’s main evented Wrestlemania and won the WWE World Title, but watching his daughter being born was the greatest moment of his life. He held her in his arms and heard her cry and then stop crying. Miz wants her to grow up and be able to be proud of her daddy because having a baby changes people. If Miz isn’t a face off that speech, he’s never going to be again. That was very sweet to hear.

Anyway it’s a standoff as we take an early break. Back with Cole asking Miz if the birth of his daughter is going to make him change his in-ring style. Miz seems to say that it will and promises to give the performance of a lifetime on Sunday. Rollins and Balor slug it out until Seth’s Blockbuster gets two. We hit a chinlock on Balor and get a commercial for AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura (good idea actually).

Back (from a split screen) with Balor fighting up and hitting the running forearms to the head. Balor’s Eye of the Hurricane gets two but Rollins sends him outside for a big suicide dive and we take another break. Back with Rollins superkicking Balor’s head off for two as the fans think this is awesome. Rollins gets kicked in the face and the Coup de Grace is loaded up, only to have Rollins hit his superplex.

Balor counters that into a small package for two, followed by Seth’s Wind-Up knee for the same. Rollins’ frog splash hits knees and Balor small packages him for two as the fans are WAY into this. They head outside with Rollins loading up the shoulder destroying Buckle Bomb. That’s countered as well and they head back in with a wicked Stomp finishing Balor at 22:03.

Rating: B+. Oh yeah they were feeling it here but above all else, you can’t ignore Miz’s heartfelt talks about his daughter. She’s only six days old at this point and of course his heart is going to be even more touched than ever. That’s the kind of thing that can get Miz cheered, or at least add another layer to his character. The match rocked as these two have some excellent chemistry together, especially in this kind of a hard hitting, back and forth match.

We recap the opening segment.

Announced for the Kickoff Show: both battle royals and the Cruiserweight Title match.

Long video on Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns, starting with Brock winning the title last year at Wrestlemania, then skipping about eleven months to Reigns winning the Elimination Chamber and the ensuing beatdowns at Brock’s hands.

Kurt Angle runs into Paul Heyman in the back and asks him not to cause any more drama tonight as he’s worried about Lesnar’s well being. Heyman finds this hilarious but promises to keep it civil tonight.

Here’s the Bar to say they don’t care who Braun Strowman has as a partner. At some point he has to tag them in and that means they can retain the titles. Cue Strowman, to say he doesn’t play well with others. He has to have a partner though and that means he’s got one. That partner is someone in the back and the partner doesn’t appreciate what they were saying.

The Bar wants the partner to come say it to their face. Strowman agrees, but only if the partner can have a match with one of them. Sheamus says it’s on so Strowman goes to get the partner, who is just like him. Strowman leaves and comes back….in a white shirt and glasses. Strowman: “My brother is Braun. I’m BRAINS!”

Brains Strowman vs. Cesaro

The Bar goes after Strowman, who takes off the glasses to reveal THE RUSE! A Brogue Kick rocks Braun but he shoves both of them away. The Bar bails and I don’t think we’re having a match. No match. That was an actually funny idea, making me think it must be Wrestlemania season.

Goldust is ready for the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal but Matt Hardy interrupts him to say that Argos of Ancient Greece and even Goliath himself have been training him to win the battle royal in honor of Humongous Wonder #8. Tonight, Goldust is scheduled for DELETION!

Matt Hardy vs. Goldust

Joined in progress with Matt applauding Goldust and getting punched in the face for his efforts. A spinebuster gives Goldust two and we hit a chinlock. Back up and Matt gets two off the Side Effect but Goldust gets the same off a powerslam. The first Twist of Fate doesn’t work but the second attempt ends Goldust at 3:09.

Rating: D. Just a way to give Matt some momentum (the most valuable thing in WWE anymore) going into the battle royal. The fact that Goldust is still going mostly strong all these years later is nothing short of amazing. He’s awesome at staying solid in the ring and it makes for some impressive performances. Matt could wind up winning the battle royal and it wouldn’t be a big surprise.

Post match Matt goes to the trophy and says PROCURE over and over.

Alexa Bliss and Mickie James suggest Nia Jax is fat and ugly. This needs to be the squashiest squash of all squashifications on Sunday.

Here’s John Cena to say he was wrong because there’s no Undertaker. He’s done everything he could to get Undertaker to DO SOMETHING. That’s not going to get Cena to put his head down though because he won’t walk into New Orleans with his head down. Cena isn’t going to have a match because Cena is going to Wrestlemania as a fan. Earlier today, Cole said go enter the Battle Royal or be Strowman’s partner or be in a triple threat match.

That won’t happen because Cena has lost in his last five pay per view matches. After all that, he would be taking a spot from a full time WWE superstar who has worked hard to earn it. That’s so dumb that I’m not even going to touch it so we’ll move on to Cena wanting one last chance. A match vs. Undertaker will be a match where neither is held back. Now Cena will go to Wrestlemania as a fan and he’s proud of it. He can’t wait to see people like Rollins and Bryan and Rusev and Elias perform on the grandest stage of them all.

Cena offers some praise to the women on the show because success isn’t determined by gender. However, there’s one more thing about Undertaker. The fans did what they could to get Undertaker to Wrestlemania but Cena thinks the fans here in Atlanta haven’t tried yet. Cena: “I don’t think you guys can be loud enough.” He says the cheering here sounds like a Dallas warmup. If they want the lightning they need to be the thunder so let him hear it all the way in Death Valley.

The fans chant for Undertaker but get nothing. Cena says that as soon as you ignore the people, you’re a dead man walking. Now it’s clear that Undertaker left his hat in the ring and his balls at home. That gets nothing either so Cena walks away with no response. Are they really waiting for Sunday to announce this? Because that would be really stupid.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Roman Reigns is in the back when Angle comes in. Angle asks him to leave to keep the peace tonight but Reigns is going to listen to what Heyman says. Roman doesn’t think much of Angle’s fear.

Here’s Elias to say Sunday will be the performance of a lifetime but tonight he’s stuck in this horrible city. He’d rather be in a town that matters but it’s time for a song….which is quickly cut off. They never said what Elias will be doing.

Elias vs. Heath Slater

Elias pounds him down to start and the fans are all behind Slater. After some stomping, Drift Away ends Slater at 1:12.

Strowman is in the back when he runs into Curt Hawkins in a PICK ME BRAUN shirt. Braun asks about Hawkins’ win/loss record and throws him through a wall. Strowman: “There’s your big break.” I’m glad they acknowledged Hawkins as an option.

Rundown of the Wrestlemania Week events.

Alexa Bliss/Mickie James vs. Dana Brooke/Asuka

Dana and Alexa start things off with Brooke throwing her into a fireman’s carry to freak Bliss out a bit. The fans want Asuka but settle for Mickie hitting Brooke in the face. A takedown gives Dana a breather and we take an abrupt break. Back with Bliss holding Brooke in a chinlock but getting suplexed down for a breather. That’s enough for the hot tag to Asuka and it’s time to clean house in short order. Asuka kicks away but gets kicked in the face, giving Mickie two twice in a row. Not that it matters as the Asuka Lock makes Mickie tap at 10:28.

Rating: D. The weird thing is they’ve built up a pretty nice rivalry between Asuka and Bliss despite having no interest in actually doing the match right now. Nia vs. Bliss is going to be a lot of fun if they do it right but I’m not sure what the point is in keeping Asuka on Raw right now. That being said, she’s getting some exposure and that’s a good thing for her going into a huge match.

Post match the double beatdown is on but here’s Nia for the save. She gets Bliss by the hair but Mickie makes the save and takes the beating for her.

Heyman and Lesnar assure Angle that nothing will go wrong.

If Reigns thinks he’s having a victory party, he’s going to have to go home to his family on Sunday night to say he got beat by Brock Lesnar. Heyman: “Roman Reigns, you’re just Brock Lesnar’s b****.” That’s enough to bring out Reigns, who asks why the full time talent is protecting Lesnar. They give Reigns a path and it’s time for the in-ring staredown. The fans chant for Roman (remember he played college football in this town) but Lesnar bails to the floor. Lesnar grabs a chair but it gets Superman Punched into his face. Two more have Brock in trouble and a third puts him down. Reigns picks up the title and is promptly F5’d to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was a mixed bag but above all else, it got the job done by making me more interested in some stuff for Sunday. Reigns vs. Lesnar has me intrigued, mainly because they didn’t push the match down our throats this year. It’s not something I’m dying to see but it should be a good power brawl with a big ending. The rest of the show was good enough to make me care about Sunday and that makes this week a success. Of course none of that matters if Sunday is a bomb (which it shouldn’t be) but this week worked for the most part.

Results

Bayley b. Sonya Deville – Rollup

Seth Rollins b. Finn Balor – The Stomp

Matt Hardy b. Goldust – Twist of Fate

Elias b. Heath Slater – Drift Away

Dana Brooke/Asuka b. Alexa Bliss/Mickie James – Asuka Lock to James

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – March 26, 2018: Cena Does Undertaker

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 26, 2018
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman

We’ve got two shows to go before New Orleans and WWE is still dragging its feet to get to John Cena vs. the Undertaker. Tonight we have Cena vs. Kane though, which is likely the next step on the way to the big showdown. Other than that, we might get a few more names added to the battle royals. Let’s get to it.

Here’s last week’s show if you need a recap.

Here are Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman to open things up. Heyman recaps the attack on Roman Reigns last week and of course we see some clips. As it turns out, Reigns’ suspension is lifted but he’s not here tonight. Heyman goes over the Samoan wrestling family raising Roman to be a star and a champion. What they didn’t raise him to be is a man.

Reigns was the one saying he was here every single week no matter what but he’s not here tonight. Maybe Reigns should have found three MMA students, dressed them up like US Marshals and beaten the heck out of them before starting a fight with Lesnar. Reigns isn’t man enough to do that though, nor is he man enough to show up here and take another beating from Brock.

Heyman loads up the end but Reigns is in the crowd. He comes out swinging with a chair and gets in a few shots but Brock runs him over. A HARD shot to the face with the steps puts Reigns down and Brock lays him out with the chair. Brock goes to leave but comes back with an F5 onto the steps. Reigns is left laying, again. The story they’re telling here is good, but Reigns not even missing a single show isn’t helping. That and the fans don’t want to cheer for Reigns and there isn’t much of a way around that problem.

Nia Jax vs. Mickie James

Nia knocks her to the floor in short order and we take a break. Back with Jax stomping away in the corner and Mickie bailing to the floor. Alexa Bliss offers a distraction and a chop block takes Nia down. Back in and a hard slam looks to set up the legdrop but Nia only hits mat. A running kick to the face drops Nia again and a missed charge makes things even worse. Mickie kicks the knee out and goes up top, earning herself a gorilla press into a Samoan drop for the pin at 7:05.

Rating: D+. The knee stuff was fine but this was what it should have been: Nia winning in a match that was just a step above a squash. She needs to destroy Bliss even faster at Wrestlemania but I have a feeling that they’ll have the match go longer in an attempt for something “epic”. That’s not what the story calls for, but we got what it calls for here.

Post match Alexa gets in a cheap shot but the glare in response sends her running.

We get a package on Ronda Rousey’s WWE career with HHH and Stephanie McMahon adding in sitdown comments. HHH says this could have been a perfect employee but Rousey and Angle had to run their mouths. We see them training and hear from the Performance Center coach who talks about how hard they train all the time. Stephanie is ready for anything and HHH never stops training.

See, Rousey is coming into a ring that Stephanie owns because she’s wrestled before. At Wrestlemania, Rousey will be humbled like everyone else that has come at the Authority. Good stuff here, but if they even think about having Stephanie be competitive against Rousey on an even remotely even playing field, they’re dumber than I thought.

Cedric Alexander/Mustafa Ali vs. TJP/Drew Gulak

Joined in progress with Ali in trouble and 205 Live General Manager Drake Maverick on commentary. Gulak gets two off a neckbreaker but Ali fights out of the chinlock and makes the hot tag to Alexander. Everything breaks down in short order and Ali hits a huge flip dive onto Gulak. Back in and Cedric hits the Neuralizer with Ali making a blind tag. The Lumbar Check sets up the 054 for the pin on TJP at 4:02. Cedric isn’t happy with the blind tag.

Rating: C. Tension between these two is a good idea and it’s a smart move to put them on the show before their title match at Wrestlemania. The build between these two has been great stuff so far and that’s all you can ask for in something like this. The title match should be a lot of fun so having some more build like this would be a good thing.

It’s time for MizTV and the fans give Miz a WELCOME HOME chant. Miz: “I live in LA.” Miz wants to talk about some personal issues and that means the Miztourage. They seem to

think things have been going well for them but Miz isn’t so pleased. For two weeks in a row they’ve let him down and that’s not acceptable. If Miz wanted failure, he never would have left Cleveland. Dallas says they’re doing everything they can but Miz tells him to Bo-Lieve himself back to catering.

Cue Seth Rollins to say that for the first time on MizTV, this is great stuff. Seth offers to mediate and asks when was the last time Miz thanked Dallas and Axel. Miz goes on a rant about himself and Bo calls him a phony A-lister who can’t fight. For some reason Miz couldn’t hear that so here’s Finn Balor to interrupt. He heard what Bo said: Miz was the biggest jerk that he’s ever met. Dallas repeats what he actually said and then realizes that he might have screwed up a little.

Miz wants to hear him say that again and the fight is almost on. That calms Miz down as he says this should be all about him retaining the title for 34 more days. If Miz reaches that milestone, he’ll be the greatest Intercontinental Champion of all time. He’ll be better than Randy Savage, Shawn Michaels and Mr. Perfect. That’s a step too far for Axel (big Shawn fan), who stands next to Dallas. Again, reality sets in so Miz cancels the show to the fans’ delight.

The Miztourage won’t let him leave though as Rollins and Balor are very pleased. The four of them surround Miz and of course it’s a ruse with the Miztourage jumping Balor and Rollins. Cue Anderson and Gallows for the save, leaving Miz alone with Balor. A belt shot misses and Balor hits a Sling Blade but Rollins can’t hit the curb stomp. Balor and Rollins get in a fight over the title as Miz tries a sneak attack. That goes badly for him as well, allowing Balor to take Rollins down. Good segment here, and thank goodness they didn’t make it a five way.

Kane is ready to destroy Cena tonight because Cena isn’t going to Wrestlemania.

Asuka vs. Jamie Frost

Jamie says Asuka doesn’t know her so she’s not ready. Kick to the face ends Frost at 32 seconds.

We hear about Cole apologizing in advance for the Ultimate Deletion. Matt Hardy has since referred to him as an obsolete mule.

Stills of the Ultimate Deletion.

Matt talks about Bray Wyatt’s tyrannical reign being replaced by Senor Benjamin’s spring daisies. Now Matt needs to set his sights on Wrestlemania by honoring the legacy of “amazing world wonder number eight” by entering the battle royal. Everyone else will be DELETED.

Cole: “That was OBNOXIOUS!”

Sasha Banks and Bayley are in the back with Bayley saying she’s in the battle royal. Banks wants to talk about last week so Bayley rants about how Banks thinks she’s the best thing in the world. That’s true, and Banks isn’t making any apologies for it. Maybe Bayley should do the same so everyone doesn’t think she’s a loser. Bayley thinks Sasha is doing it because everyone knows she can’t beat her.

Sasha is a four time Women’s Champion but Bayley asks how long she kept it. Those are fighting words and it’s on with Sasha getting the better of it until referees break things up. More horrible acting, as you can tell they were just reading a script. How hard can it be to say “you’re mad at each other because Sasha can’t beat Bayley, go bicker with each other for a minute”? If they don’t have any more faith in them than that, don’t give them live microphones.

Braun Strowman comes out for a match but here’s the Bar to demand to know Strowman’s partner. Strowman will tell them if Sheamus can beat him. Maybe they’ll get an answer, but they’re going to GET THESE HANDS.

Braun Strowman vs. Sheamus

Strowman gets low bridged to start and might have tweaked his knee. The ten forearms to the chest are broken up and a single forearm puts Sheamus on the floor as well. Sheamus gets sent outside again and we take a break. Back with Sheamus kicking at the knee for a bit until Braun fights up and tosses him to the floor. Sheamus makes the mistake of standing there, allowing Braun to run him over with the big shoulder. Back in and Braun goes shoulder first into the post. It doesn’t seem to matter as the powerslam ends Sheamus at 7:53.

Rating: D+. Man I could go for a Sheamus vs. Braun hoss fight with the roles reversed. If there’s one thing Sheamus can do, it’s hit people really hard in a good brawl. I’m down with not knowing the partner before Wrestlemania, as the anticipation could make it a lot of fun. Not much here, and hopefully the knee injury isn’t anything.

Here’s Kurt Angle to bring out Ronda Rousey. Angle talks about Stephanie and HHH being ready for anything so Wrestlemania is going to be a lot of fun. Rousey was watching that video earlier and Stephanie is tough, but she’s trust fun tough. She’s limousine riding tough. At Wrestlemania, she’s get what’s coming to her when Ronda takes her arm out of its socket.

Cue Absolution with Paige saying this is their world. It’s nice that Rousey is going into her first match but she needs backup. Rousey could be the fourth member of Absolution! That’s a no from Ronda so Paige sends the other two after her. Deville goes down with one shot and Rousey suplexes Mandy into Sonya’s legs. Rousey grabs Mandy’s arm and cranks a bit but Angle calms her down. That’s very Ken Shamrock of her. This was another rough segment from Rousey, but once she goes beast mode, she’s exactly what WWE wants her to be. The talking though….needs some work.

We recap the opening sequence.

Anderson and Gallows vs. Miztourage

Joined in progress with Anderson hitting the Rocket Kick (HI-YAH) in the corner on Axel but a Dallas distraction lets Curtis shove him to the floor. A chinlock keeps things down until Anderson fights up with a spinebuster. The hot tag brings in Gallows for a kick to Axel’s head and a big splash keeps him in trouble. The Boot of Doom only gets two with Dallas making the save. Not that it matters as the Magic Killer finishes Axel at 4:36.

Rating: C-. Slightly better than I was expecting here as they had some nice near falls. Anderson and Gallows are the much better team going forward as the Miztourage is really only there as lackeys. I could see Anderson and Gallows going after whoever Strowman wins the titles with in an early losing effort down the line.

Here’s Elias to talk about performing on the grandest stage of them all in thirteen days. He’s not happy with going from Madison Square Garden over the weekend to Cleveland tonight but just like LeBron James, he’s leaving soon. After a song about hating Cleveland, it’s time for a match.

Elias vs. Rhyno

Rhyno runs him over with a shoulder to start but gets taken down with a clothesline. A chinlock doesn’t last long but Rhyno’s comeback is even shorter as Drift Away gives Elias the pin at 1:25.

Long recap of Cena challenging Undertaker to no avail.

John Cena vs. Kane

No DQ. Kane wastes no time in stomping Cena down and a big boot puts him on the floor. We’re already in the chinlock and Cena can’t power up with the AA as Kane falls down onto him for two. They head outside with Cena being sent into the steps as we take a break. Back with Kane knocking him through the crowd and hitting a suplex onto a well placed piece of barricade. They head back to the ring with Kane putting him down and going to take off a turnbuckle.

Cena sits up and sends him into the buckle, followed by the throat slit. A chokeslam gets two on Kane and it’s table time. Kane sits up this time though and shoves the table over before the AA can connect. Instead he sends Cena through the table in the corner for two. Rather than going after Cena even more, it’s another table being set up instead. The chokeslam is countered into an AA through the table to give Cena the pin at 14:02.

Rating: C. I’m still not interested in seeing Cena vs. Kane but at least they’re doing something else to set up the match than the usual stuff. That being said, Cena acting like Undertaker is some horrible person for wanting to retire because Cena wants a match at Wrestlemania is flimsy at best. This was perfectly fine for a house show main event.

Post match Cena wants to know where the lightning is. He calls Undertaker a coward again because there’s no response. Cena is willing to go to Wrestlemania as a fan because all he wants is SOMETHING from Undertaker. There’s just one week left to go because Undertaker has one week left to do something and define his career. Oh good grief. Anyway Cena wants him here next week because it’s Undertaker’s last chance.

Overall Rating: C+. This week was mainly about advancing the stories that were already set up and I’m getting more and more excited for Wrestlemania every week. There’s a very solid card to be found in there, though stuff like Cena acting as if Undertaker’s career means nothing because he’s old and broken down doesn’t do much for me. The good stuff was good here and they’re getting my interest up, which is all that matters right now.

Results

Nia Jax b. Mickie James – Samoan drop

Cedric Alexander/Mustafa Ali b. TJP/Drew Gulak – 054 to TJP

Asuka b. Jamie Frost – Kick to the head

Braun Strowman b. Sheamus – Powerslam

Anderson and Gallows b. Miztourage – Magic Killer to Axel

Elias b. Rhyno – Drift Away

John Cena b. Kane – Attitude Adjustment through a table

Remember to check out my new forum at steelcageforums.com, follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – March 5, 2018: Lifting a Car and Dropping a Piano

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 5, 2018
Location: BMO Harris Bradley Center, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman

With five episodes to go before Wrestlemania, this show needs to start getting ready for Wrestlemania. At the moment, there is one match confirmed for the biggest show of the year and we’re 34 days out. I know there’s Fastlane to get through first but Raw doesn’t have another pay per view between now and New Orleans. Get something set up this week. Let’s get to it.

Here’s last week’s show if you need a recap.

Here’s Kurt Angle to get things going. Kurt is serious this week because he got sucker punched last week. HHH hit him right in the jaw and while Kurt has swallowed his pride before, he’s calling HHH out right now. The jacket comes off and here’s a swaggering Stephanie (the obvious response) instead. Stephanie asks about Angle’s five kids and ex-wife, meaning he likely has an alimony payment. She advises Kurt to stick with what he does for a living and here’s Ronda Rousey to interrupt.

Rousey talks about the people who brought her here not being what they said they were but she’s dealt with that before. Stephanie laughs this off and says people don’t often understand their bosses’ decisions. What Rousey needs to remember is that she signed a contract with WWE and that puts her under Stephanie. Ronda remembers something about that contract: she’s allowed to pick her opponent. That opponent would be Stephanie, so here’s HHH to keep his wife from a bad case of death.

Angle brings up that Stephanie also has a wrestler’s contract (Why?) so the match is on. She’s not the only one with a wrestler’s contract because HHH has one too. That’s why the mixed tag match is on for Wrestlemania. HHH leaves so Stephanie loads up the slap on Angle, only to have Rousey grab the arm. HHH comes back in for the save and the fight is on with Stephanie knocking Rousey down from behind. The stare sends her bailing as HHH is put in the ankle lock. Stephanie comes back for the save but gets pulled back into the ring for a not great Samoan drop from Rousey.

Asuka vs. Nia Jax

Asuka is thrown outside to start and we go split screen to hear Alexa Bliss say Nia is winning tonight. Back to full screen with Asuka being planted off a backbreaker. An Octopus hold slows Nia down but she throws Asuka into the corner without much effort. A reverse Eye of the Storm drops Asuka and we take a break.

Back with Asuka reeling but scoring with a Shining Wizard for two. The Samoan drop plants Asuka but she avoids the legdrop. Instead it’s off to the cross armbreaker which transitions into a triangle choke. Nia can’t powerbomb her way out, even when she drives Asuka into the corner. Asuka switches back into the armbreaker and Nia taps at 11:05.

Rating: C. WE GET IT ALREADY! My goodness this is the exact same thing that Nia has done in EVERY BIG MATCH and it’s not interesting anymore. I never bought that Asuka was in any real danger because there’s no way anything else was happening here. Nia is rapidly becoming the one who gets to look dominant but never wins anything, which is going to catch up to her very soon.

Nia gets the big hero’s reaction post match as she stands up and walks out, holding the damaged arm.

Revival vs. The Bar

Non-title but the Revival gets a title shot if they win. Dawson gets taken into the wrong corner to start and the Bar takes turns pounding him down. A double gordbuster (oh the Anderson vibes are strong with this one) puts Sheamus on the floor and we take a break. Back with Revival kicking Sheamus’ legs out as everything breaks down. A PowerPlex of all things gets two on Cesaro but Sheamus makes the save. Wilder is sent outside and the Neutralizer gives Cesaro the pin at 9:30.

Rating: D+. We’re either getting War Machine (not happening) or the multi team ladder match. I’m not sure why we would want to see this, but that’s what we seem to be getting. There’s no one to challenge the Bar at the moment so unless they’re mixing the brands up, I have no idea which single team we could be getting.

Here’s John Cena to talk about getting a title match at Fastlane. He’s a free agent so he can be on both shows. So why is he here if he has a title match at a Smackdown pay per view? He’s here because he knows none of the other people in the match will let him have a chance to speak. This Sunday, the record is being broken when Cena wins his seventeenth World Title.

People always talk about how Cena holds people back and is handed everything, but he earned this chance when he beat AJ Styles 1-2-3. When he wins on Sunday, the critics will be there to say he’s robbed AJ of a Wrestlemania moment. Cena is encouraging AJ to make a better Wrestlemania moment and cash in his rematch to make it a triple threat with Cena, Styles and Shinsuke Nakamura.

This brings out, I kid you not, Goldust of all people, quoting the I’m a bum speech from On the Waterfront. Goldust has a dream of going to Wrestlemania too and that starts with preventing Cena from getting there. His dreams are always taken away and tonight, he’s taking over this silver screen as Cena’s new director. One right hand puts Cena down and we go to a break.

Goldust vs. John Cena

Joined in progress for a first time ever match actually. Goldust kicks him in the face and snaps off the powerslam to keep Cena in trouble. A knee drop allows Goldust to pose but he takes too long, allowing Cena to grab a standing chinlock. Goldust hits him low for two but Cena pops up, initiates the finishing sequence, and finishes with the AA at 3:47.

Rating: D. Uh, sure? I have no idea what the point of this was supposed to be but they went with it anyway. This was the most random match I’ve seen in a long time and I’m really not sure what they were going for. The match wasn’t terrible or anything but it really feels like they’re just making this up as they go instead of having any form of a plan.

Elias tries to get out of the Symphony of Destruction match with Braun Strowman tonight but Angle says no.

Hillbilly Jim Hall of Fame video. I couldn’t be happier.

Here’s Bayley for a chat before her match. She got serious last week and Sasha Banks wasn’t happy with it….so here’s Absolution to interrupt. Paige makes fun of Bayley for finally growing up and we’re ready to go.

Mandy Rose vs. Bayley

Rose takes her down to start and trash talking in the corner ensues. Bayley gets driven hard into the corner and a slam gets two. Back up and Mandy bails for a bit as we take a break. We come back with Bayley fighting up and kicking Mandy away from the ropes. The Stunner over the middle rope drops Mandy again but Sonya Deville gets on the apron. The distraction completely fails though as Bayley grabs a rollup for the pin at 8:36.

Rating: D+. This was there to set up something post match and that’s all well and good. I mean, it’s no Goldust vs. John Cena but I’ll take what I can get. Bayley overcoming the odds to win over a lower level opponent makes sense and continues the build to her match with Sasha at Wrestlemania. Good story advancement, not a great match.

Post match Absolution beats Bayley down until Sasha makes the save. Bayley doesn’t buy it.

Women’s History Month video on Eunice Kennedy Shriver, creator of the Special Olympics.

Alexa and Mickie James come in to see Nia, who is icing down the arm. Bliss talks about how Nia might not make it to Wrestlemania this year but she’ll be there one day. She goes on about how Nia was bullied for her size when she was a kid and it continues to this day. Nia breaks down in tears as Bliss tells her to keep fighting before everyone loses all respect for her. This was really good and Nia destroying Bliss for talking down to her should be great.

Ronda Rousey was inducted into the International Sports Hall of Fame over the weekend.

We look at the opening segment again.

Braun Strowman is ready to GIVE THESE HANDS to Elias.

Here’s Elias at a piano before the Symphony of Destruction match. Elias loves symphonies because they’re cultured, unlike this hick town. He goes over to the drums for a little number before picking up the guitar for the weekly song. After saying Milwaukee sucks, Elias, says he can’t stand a single one of the fans. Now it’s time for the regular entrance….and there’s no Elias. Instead he’s bailing through the crowd and into the back to a waiting car. The car doesn’t go anywhere though because Strowman is LIFTING IT OFF THE GROUND. Ok so it’s a good editing trick but still a cool visual.

Elias vs. Braun Strowman

Anything goes and falls count anywhere with musical instruments on the stage. Elias gets out of the powerslam and breaks a guitar over Strowman’s back to limited effect. A top rope elbow gets one and Strowman throws him to the floor. They head to the announcers’ table and Elias escapes another powerslam, only to get shoved into the video wall. The big string bass crushes Elias again and Strowman throws him underneath a piano. After banging on the keys a bit, Braun drops the piano on him and gets the pin at 5:04.

Rating: C-. This could have been a lot more fun but what we got was good enough. I’m not sure where it leads though as this was as one sided as you could have gotten. I can’t imagine we get a Wrestlemania match as a result as there’s no point in having another match after this kind of destruction. That never stopped WWE though so you can probably pencil it in.

Elias does a stretcher job.

Announcement of the Saudi Arabia Royal Rumble next month. Put it on the Network perhaps?

Bray Wyatt vs. Rhyno

Bray runs him over with a clothesline and Sister Abigail is good for the pin at 47 seconds.

Post match Bray calls out Matt Hardy, who appears on screen with music playing behind him. He talks about a battlefield that is worthy of their combat, meaning the Hardy Compound. The video goes to said compound, complete with Vanguard One and Skarsgard, the dilapidated boat. Laughter ensues.

It’s time for the third annual Mizzies, with Miz talking about how awesome his awards are. The Darkest Hour was when the Shape of Water won Best Picture over Marine 5. Three Billboards Outside Ebbing Missouri should be three billboards outside New Orleans, featuring his face. Out first award is for the Superstar Best at Patting Themselves on the back. The nominees:

Seth Rollins for bragging about lasting 65 minutes in a match he lost

Kurt Angle for FINALLY being a good father to Jason Jordan

Finn Balor for winning the Universal Title and holding it less than 24 hours

The winners: Rollins and Balor, neither of whom were invited tonight!

Next up: Worst Decision By a Raw General Manager! The nominees:

Kurt Angle for bringing his son to Raw

Kurt Angle for letting Balor and Rollins into the Elimination Chamber

Kurt Angle for failing to name Miz’s Wrestlemania opponent

Angle wins (no specific incident mentioned) but can’t accept because he’s too busy sucking up to Ronda Rousey. Miz is about to announce the lifetime achievement Mizzie but here’s Rollins to interrupt. Balor cuts him off pretty quickly but Miz says he isn’t sure which of them is a bigger disappointment. This isn’t Japan where Balor can get over on a smile and a hand gesture that isn’t his. Last week was a glorified handicap match so let’s have a real handicap match right now with Miz/Miztourage vs. the two of them. The match is on.

Finn Balor/Seth Rollins vs. Miz/Miztourage

Balor works on Curtis Axel’s arm to start and it’s off to Rollins for an ax handle to said arm. A shot from the apron allows Axel to take over, followed by Bo Dallas dropping a knee. We hit the chinlock for a bit until Rollins dives over for the tag to Balor. A Miz distraction breaks up 1916 and Dallas runs Balor over as we take a break.

Back with Rollins hitting the Falcon Arrow for two on Miz and the low superkick gets the same. Rollins nails a suicide dive on the Miztourage but Balor tags himself in, much to Seth’s annoyance. Finn hits a flip dive of his own but Rollins tags himself in as Finn loads up the Coup de Grace. Instead it’s the Curb Stomp to pin Miz at 11:02.

Rating: C-. I’m fine with this, though they would have been better off to have one of the Miztourage members taking the pin here instead of Miz himself. I know it’s there to set up the triple threat match and that’s all well and good, but do something other than having Miz lose AGAIN, when you have goons there to do it for him.

Post match Angle comes out and announces Miz defending against Rollins and Balor at Wrestlemania.

Fastlane rundown.

Here’s Paul Heyman to respond to Roman Reigns’ comments last week. Heyman lays the title down, saying he’s allowed to do it because Brock Lesnar allows him to. Roman came out here last week and criticized Lesnar’s schedule. The biggest win of Reigns’ career is defeating the Undertaker last year at Wrestlemania. Brock Lesnar did that too and Lesnar is Brock Lesnar 365 days a year.

After Wrestlemania, Brock may let Heyman come out here and lay the title down again. Then maybe he’ll lay the UFC Heavyweight Championship next to it. At Wrestlemania, Reigns is coming for the title but that’s just not happening. Heyman: “And Afa Wrestlemania, you can Sika new title to challenge for, because this one is going home with Brock Lesnar.” Heyman goes to leave but stops to hold up the title. Last week Reigns said Lesnar was a b****. The reality is the title is Lesnar’s b****.

Brock does what he wants with it and looks at it whenever he wants but Reigns has been looking at it. The title, which isn’t a belt or a strap but proof that Lesnar is the best in the universe, is going to have to be pried out of Lesnar’s hot, active fingers. Reigns wants to be champion because it’s his bloodline, but the title is what matters most to Lesnar. If Reigns wants to be the Universal Champion, he can’t go home if he finds out something happened to his father, because someone has to be there to defend and present this title the night after Wrestlemania.

Reigns isn’t the man to take the title from Lesnar and there’s no way around it. Now Reigns knows that he shouldn’t shoot from the hip with Heyman and he shouldn’t shoot in the ring with Lesnar. Heyman goes to leave again but now it’s Reigns coming out to interrupt. Reigns says this is proof that what he said is right: all he did is sent Heyman for his rebuttal. All the fans want is for their champion to show up and want to be here. Brock is going to be in Detroit next week so he better be dressed for a fight. Heyman gets out as fast as he can to end the show.

It’s a good promo from Heyman, albeit a little long. The problem though is all the cheering for Reigns comes to a crashing halt as soon as Brock shows up. If it doesn’t happen on Raw, it’s going to happen at Wrestlemania. It’s a story we’ve tried before and I have no idea why we’re stuck doing it all over again. At least it should be over soon though and the promos have been solid so far.

Overall Rating: C-. The wrestling wasn’t the strongest here but it did what it needed to do: setting up things for Wrestlemania. We came in with one match confirmed and left with three of them, which is a pretty good amount when you consider two of them are top matches. They can continue doing this for a few more weeks and that’s what matters most. Get some more matches set and the show will come together.

As for the stuff on this show….eh. I don’t get having Nia out there to lose to Asuka again and I really don’t get a few of the other matches. What in the world was the point of having Goldust losing to Cena out there? The wrestling was a mess but the storytelling worked, which brings the show up to a higher level. At least this felt like a Wrestlemania buildup show though, which is the first time that’s been the case.

Results

Asuka b. Nia Jax – Cross armbreaker

The Bar b. Revival – Neutralizer to Dawson

John Cena b. Goldust – Attitude Adjustment

Bayley b. Mandy Rose – Rollup

Braun Strowman b. Elias – Strowman dropped a piano on Elias

Bray Wyatt b. Rhyno – Sister Abigail

Finn Balor/Seth Rollins b. Miz/Miztourage – Curb Stomp to Miz

Remember to check out my new forum at steelcageforums.com, follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the 2018 Updated Version of the History of the WWE Championship in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/01/26/new-book-kbs-history-of-the-wwe-championship-2018-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Main Event – March 1, 2018: No Apology Necessary

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: March 1, 2018
Location: Honda Center, Anaheim, California
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness

The show is in a weird place this week as we have the build to Wrestlemania beginning on the Raw side but Smackdown has another pay per view to get through before it can head for New Orleans. Hopefully Smackdown at least gets some attention this week, but you never can tell. Let’s get to it.

Here’s this week’s Raw

And this week’s Smackdown

Opening sequence.

Akira Tozawa vs. Ariya Daivari

Tozawa starts with the chops and yelling stomps in the corner. The backsplash gets two but Daivari gets in a neckbreaker for his first offense. A backbreaker onto the knee sets up a chinlock but Tozawa is back up with a Shining Wizard. It’s too early for the backsplash so Tozawa settles for the suicide dive. Back in and a missile dropkick gives Tozawa two, only to eat a superkick. Daivari runs up top so the frog splash can get two. Not that it matters as Tozawa kicks him in the head and drops the top rope backsplash for the pin at 6:20.

Rating: C-. Can we please find someone else for the cruiserweights to beat up? I’ve seen it happen to Daivari so many times now that it’s really hard to care. Tozawa has been lost in the shuffle as of late and that’s a shame because he really is one of the best performers on the roster. Get him out there more often, if nothing else to make people look good.

Package on the men’s Elimination Chamber match. They’re never going to mention Strowman destroying Reigns after the match again are they?

From Raw.

Here’s Roman Reigns for the showdown with Lesnar. Actually never mind, because Reigns says something happened and Lesnar isn’t here. It’s not like it would matter as Lesnar doesn’t show up unless he’s getting paid. Lesnar hides behind his contract and shows up when he feels like it. Last night, Lesnar was in Las Vegas but he was running around with Dana White from the UFC.

Reigns is going to get in trouble for this but he’s here every single week no matter what. He cares about this place and doesn’t just call himself a businessman like Lesnar and Heyman. He’s going to go to the back and take his yelling like a man because he actually cares about this place. This was a few years late, but it’s Roman’s best promo ever. Build this up as a fight and it’s a much more interesting main event.

Also from Raw.

Here’s John Cena to discuss his path to Wrestlemania. Last night he failed in the Elimination Chamber and then had a microphone shoved in his face. He wasn’t sure what to say but now he’s figured it out. After all these failures in the Royal Rumble and the Elimination Chamber, it’s time for a Wrestlemania challenge. It’s time for John Cena to challenge THE UNDERTAKER for Wrestlemania.

The place goes nuts but Cena says that’s not happening either. Cena doesn’t make the matches around here and has been told that match is impossible. Therefore, his road to Wrestlemania now goes through Smackdown, because Cena is a free agent. He’ll be there tomorrow night to earn a spot, so see you then. It’s a good thing we can’t see Cena, because he’s sounding really dumb right now. Apparently everyone without a match right now has failed, meaning everyone but Shinsuke Nakamura, AJ Styles, Lesnar and Reigns have failed. Just please don’t be Undertaker. Please.

From Smackdown.

Here’s John Cena to open things up. He makes no bones about it: he wants in on the Fatal Five Way for the #1 contendership at Fastlane so let’s find out what he has to do to get there. Fans: “NO! NO! NO!” Cue Commissioner Shane McMahon to summarize everything, only to be cut off by a LET’S GO CENA/CENA SUCKS chant.

Cena says half the people want him in the match so he should go in. The fans switch to RUSEV DAY and it seems that Cena will be having a shot. This brings out Daniel Bryan, to say he agrees with Shane. They’re willing to put Cena in the main event and if he wins, he’s in the Fastlane title match. His opponent tonight: AJ Styles. The DQ finish seems obvious and that would make the most sense at this point.

And from later in the night.

AJ Styles vs. John Cena

Non-title. Feeling out process to start with Cena hitting an early shoulder block for two. A chickening/half nelson has AJ in trouble but he fights out with some chops for a breather. The tornado DDT out of the corner lands awkwardly and gives Cena two as we take a break. Back with Cena hitting the ProtoBomb and Five Knuckle Shuffle but AJ comes back with the fireman’s carry neckbreaker for a near fall of his own.

A TKO of all things gives Cena the same and Baron Corbin is watching in the back. AJ’s torture rack neckbreaker and Cena’s hard running clothesline get two each but Cena charges into an enziguri as we take another break. Back again with AJ getting two off a clothesline of his own but a Lionsault misses. Cena grabs a Code Red for two more and floats over from the near fall into the STF.

That’s reversed as well and the Phenomenal Forearm gets two. The springboard 450 hits knees though and the AA connects. Cena tries another though and winds up on the floor where a missed charge sends him into the steps. AJ won’t take the countout though and gets AA’d through the announcers’ table for a knockout. Cena rolls back in as the referee checks on AJ, meaning Styles can dive back in to beat the ten count. There’s the Calf Crusher but Cena powers to his feet for another AA and the pin at 22:00.

Rating: B+. These two could have a good match in their sleep so this is no surprise. It’s also not a surprise that Cena is going to the pay per view where he can have another shot at Wrestlemania, which means he’s likely losing at Fastlane so we can set up Cena vs. Undertaker in less than a month. Still though, as good as you would have expected here.

Fastlane rundown.

Curt Hawkins vs. Goldust

They fight over a wristlock to start and Hawkins bails to the ropes to get out of a headlock. That means a spank and Hawkins is begging for a DQ because he was in the ropes. Goldust can’t breathe thanks to running the ropes but Hawkins lays down so Goldust can pin him. Of course this doesn’t work but the small package does get two. Goldust gets knocked outside and we take a break. Back with Hawkins getting two off a Michinoku Driver, only to get caught in the Golden Cross (basically Cross Rhodes) for the pin at 7:38.

Rating: D+. The comedy wasn’t bad here but much like the cruiserweight matches, if you’ve seen it once, you’ve seen all it has to offer. Hawkins never winning is funny, but I’m getting curious about how they’re going to pay it off. Unless he beats a big name to advance their story, I’m not sure what the point of the whole thing is other than low level comedy.

Stills from the women’s Elimination Chamber and Asuka vs. Nia Jax.

Video on the Ronda Rousey signing from Elimination Chamber.

From Raw again.

Here are HHH and Stephanie for the response to last night. First though, here’s the same video package for the third time. Stephanie says that was Ronda acting out of savage instinct and the slap was to remind her of who is boss. Now though we need an apology from Kurt Angle so we can get on the Road to Wrestlemania. Instead here’s a ticked off Ronda but Kurt runs down and cuts her off.

Ronda talks about having never been slapped before and how that took her to a different place. Angle says he needs this job but last night, he lied. The things he said HHH and Stephanie said aren’t true. Stephanie gets back in and says they’re not bad people and goes to leave again. Ronda says not so fast and says it’s Stephanie who needs to apologize to her. If she doesn’t, Stephanie’s arm is coming out of its socket. Stephanie gets in her face and apologizes in a funny bit. The bosses go to leave again but HHH punches Kurt in the face on the way out.

Overall Rating: C+. This is the kind of thing Main Event should be for: it recapped the top stories and while there’s a lot more to look at, this at least managed to cover almost everything that was needed. It’s not easy to cram five plus hours of material (not counting the stuff from Elimination Chamber) into a forty five minute show, especially considering the two bonus match. As it was though, they did it quite well here and the show was easy to watch as a result.

Remember to check out my new forum at steelcageforums.com and pick up the 2018 Updated Version of the History of the WWE Championship in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/01/26/new-book-kbs-history-of-the-wwe-championship-2018-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – February 26, 2018: Should We Do Something?

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 26, 2018
Location: Honda Center, Anaheim, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman

It’s the night after Elimination Chamber and the first of six Monday Night Raws before we get to New Orleans for Wrestlemania XXXIV. Last night saw the most obvious of obvious endings with Roman Reigns winning the Elimination Chamber, basically taking him from not doing much to being in the biggest match of the year overnight. You can’t fight that script you see. Let’s get to it.

Here’s last week’s show.

And last night’s pay per view.

We open with a recap of Reigns winning the Chamber.

Here’s an abbreviated version of the HHH/Stephanie McMahon/Kurt Angle/Ronda Rousey segment. Stephanie has DEMANDED an apology tonight. Well now it’s serious.

Here are Alexa Bliss and the now heel Mickie James for a chat. Bliss brags about the win last night and says she knew it would happen. Mickie gets some praise as well before Bliss talks about how she’s the greatest thing ever on Raw. Bayley is a lost cause and Sasha’s big ego caught up to her again.

Alexa hopes Asuka is ready for Wrestlemania so here’s Asuka in person. Asuka storms to the ring but Bliss cuts her off, saying Jax should have been in the match but she made one mistake. Cue Jax so Asuka goes after Bliss and James, only to get dropped by Jax. A triangle choke has Jax in trouble but Bliss and James come back in for the save. Cue Bayley and Sasha for the save but Jax lays them out too.

Bayley/Sasha Banks/Asuka vs. Nia Jax/Alexa Bliss/Mickie James

Joined in progress in the match you knew was coming. Bayley gets beaten down with a few shots to the back, including a hard one from Bliss. It’s quickly off to Banks though and the double knees in the corner get two on Alexa. Sasha gets sent to the floor though and Jax runs her over like she’s not even there.

Back from a break with Banks in trouble off a Mickie chinlock. Banks kicks her away and loads up a tag but Bayley drops to the floor and stands in the aisle. Instead it’s off to Asuka (so Sasha gets an upgrade) for the rapid fire kicks, followed by a rolling leg/armbar to make Mickie tap out at 10:53.

Rating: C-. I can’t count how man times I’ve seen some incarnation of this match. Bayley FINALLY wising up and doing something logical was nice to see but other than that, this was every six woman tag you’ve seen over and over again. You can pretty much book Bliss vs. Jax for the title and that’s the best option, but we need a better way of booking the women and soon.

Heath Slater vs. Bray Wyatt

Bray beats up Slater and Rhyno before the bell rings. The beating ensues and there’s no match.

Post match Bray sits in the corner with his eyes looking like he’s about to cry. This is all on Matt Hardy for driving Bray to this. The Great War is still going and they will face each other again. Well it didn’t work the first two times so maybe the third is the right idea.

We see the Rousey package again.

Here’s Miz to have his Wrestlemania opponent announced. First of all, we hear about how awesome Hollywood is and how Miz is only 62 days before becoming the longest reigning Intercontinental Champion of all time. After that, he’ll be the greatest champion of all time. Not Chris Jericho, not Edge, not Bret Hart and not Shawn Michaels. He’s still no Tito Santana.

Miz is tired of being treated like a joke without even having merchandise to be sold. He wants to know his opponent for Wrestlemania so earlier today he asked Kurt Angle. All he was told was that his opponent tonight MIGHT tell him who that is going to be. This sends Miz into a rant about how he deserves better than might because he’s carried this show for the last year. Here’s tonight’s opponent.

Seth Rollins vs. The Miz

Non-title. Rollins sends him outside in short order but the Miztourage get in a few shots to take over. Miz whips Seth into the barricade and they head back inside for a chinlock. The YES Kicks have Rollins in trouble and allow the announcers to debate who invented them again. Seth gets tossed to the floor again and we take a break.

Back with Seth getting back into it but not being able to hit the frog splash. Miz scores with the corner dropkicks but the top rope ax handle is broken up with a quick crotching. The superplex into a Falcon Arrow gets two on Miz but Rollins hits a dive onto the Miztourage. Back in and the frog splash (with a BIG leap) gives Rollins the pin at 14:24.

Post match here’s Finn Balor and it’s time for round two.

Finn Balor vs. The Miz

Non-title again….and the Miztourage comes in for the DQ at 24 seconds.

Anderson and Gallows come in for the save but Angle pops up on screen to say we’re continuing until there’s a winner or Miz isn’t going until Wrestlemania.

Finn Balor vs. The Miz

Non-title. Miz hits a running corner dropkick and gets two off a DDT. More shots to the back and a faceplant gets two on Balor as this is one sided so far. A running knee gives Miz two and we take a break. Back with Balor jawbreaking his way out of a chinlock and hitting a kick to the head. The announcers argue over who should be #1 contender.

Cole says Balor should get a shot if he pins Miz, just like Rollins. Graves logically points out that Miz isn’t fresh coming into this match, which makes far too much sense for this. Balor hits something like an Eye of the Hurricane for two, followed by the Sling Blade to rock Miz again. The Coup de Grace gives Balor the pin at 10:50.

Rating: C-. This was all angle but Cole sounded really stupid saying it was a fair exchange. As Graves pointed out, Balor beat a worn down Miz and somehow that’s supposed to be the same thing. I’m sure there will be several other wrestlers added to the match because that’s how the Intercontinental Title match works and it’s not like there’s a big match to be wasted otherwise where you can put these people in to make it matter.

Post match, Cole yells at Graves for being a Miz propaganda machine as Graves wants Mantaur and Abe Knuckleball Schwartz out here. Maybe they can beat Miz too and it’ll be the same thing!

Rollins says there’s more than one way to Wrestlemania and he knows how to get there. He wants Miz and the Intercontinental Title and he wants them at Wrestlemania.

Braun Strowman is going to put a symphony of destruction on Elias tonight.

Black History Month video.

Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Titus Worldwide

The Bar is defending and this is 2/3 falls. Brogue Kick gives Sheamus the first fall over Titus at 9 seconds. Apollo comes in to give Titus a break and scores with a dropkick. It’s back to Titus for a slam, followed by Apollo’s jumping elbow for two. Back from a break with the champs still in control but Apollo getting over for a hot tag to Titus.

Something like a Dominator/shoulder breaker (looked a bit botched) plants Sheamus and Apollo adds a frog splash for two. The standing moonsault gets the same with Cesaro making the save. Apollo dives over the top onto Sheamus but gets crotched back inside. The assisted White Noise retains the titles in two straight falls at 11:19.

Rating: C+. We’ve seen this match several times now and it’s not exactly doing anything to show the depth of the tag division. Really at this point it has to be Bar vs. Revival at Wrestlemania as there’s no one left for them to face. That being said, I’m not sure who benefited from having them split this many wins. Titus Worldwide does get a rub, but it doesn’t matter if they’re done as a title contender with no one left to fight. But at least they killed a few months, which is the lone benefit from this thing.

Post match the Bar celebrates, saying they have Titus Worldwide’s number and it’s zero. They brag about their string of success but there’s no one left to face.

Jarrius Robertson, a double liver transplant survivor, is getting the Warrior Award at the Hall of Fame.

Here’s Elias with the guitar to talk about noise pollution. Braun Strowman is noise pollution. Everything Graves says is noise pollution. It’s time for the song and of course it calls the crowd a bunch of losers, just like Strowman.

Braun Strowman vs. Elias

Elias tries to bail to the floor but Braun easily catches him and throws Elias around the ring a bit. A double ax handle to the chest sets up a running splash in the corner. Strowman hits him in the head but gets his throat snapped across the top rope. Elias scores with a top rope ax handle but is quickly cut off as Strowman just runs him over. They head to the floor with Elias hiding grabbing a fire extinguisher to spray Strowman for the DQ at 5:04.

Rating: D. This was an angle instead of a match as they seem to be setting up a rematch at Wrestlemania. I’ve heard of worse ideas and it would be nice to have them put together something with two younger guys like this for a change. Strowman deserves a fun win at the show anyway. Well he deserves the World Title but that can’t happen here.

Post match Elias gets punched to the floor but slips out of the powerslam through the announcers’ table. Elias gets into the parking lot and escapes as a limo pulls up.

No word on who was in the limo.

Overall Rating: C. This was an up and down show as they kept teasing setting up stuff for Wrestlemania but nothing was actually announced. They have five shows left and it would be nice to have something actually set up instead of being hinted at. They’re running out of time and that needs to light a fire under them already. It’s not a bad show but they need to do something pretty soon.

Results

Bayley/Sasha Banks/Asuka b. Mickie James/Alexa Bliss/Nia Jax – Armbar to James

Seth Rollins b. The Miz – Frog splash

Finn Balor b. The Miz via DQ when the Miztourage interfered

Finn Balor b. The Miz – Coup de Grace

The Bar b. Titus Worldwide – Assisted White Noise to Apollo

Braun Strowman b. Elias via DQ when Elias sprayed him with a fire extinguisher

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the 2018 Updated Version of the History of the WWE Championship in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/01/26/new-book-kbs-history-of-the-wwe-championship-2018-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Elimination Chamber 2018: You Can’t Fight the Script But You Can Do That To Your Future Boss

IMG Credit: WWE

Elimination Chamber 2018
Date: February 25, 2018
Location: T-Mobile Arena, Paradise, Nevada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman

We’re only two stops away from Wrestlemania now because it just wouldn’t be right to not squeeze in a pair of pay per views between the Royal Rumble and Wrestlemania. Tonight is a show of pretty predictable endings but at least the Elimination Chamber matches themselves should be a lot of fun. Let’s get to it.

Here’s the go home Raw.

And last year’s show.

Kickoff Show: Anderson and Gallows vs. Miztourage

Axel headlocks Anderson to start but gets kicked in the face as the announcers talk about Sasha Banks. A clothesline takes Axel down again and there’s the HI-YAH kick in the corner. Back from a break with Axel slowly stomping Anderson down as the announcers talk about the stars being out in Vegas tonight. Anderson gets in a clothesline and rolls over for the hot tag to Gallows. A high kick to Axel has the Miztourage in trouble but the referee says there was no tag. Not that it matters as Anderson grabs the spinning spinebuster to set up the real hot tag. The Magic Killer puts Dallas away at 8:49.

Rating: D+. Total Raw level tag match here and that’s not the best thing in the world. The Revival needs to be in this picture a lot sooner, hopefully getting the titles somewhere around Wrestlemania (the night after would be a good place). Odds are this sets up a six man or Miz vs. Balor and that’s all it should be doing.

The opening video is standard fare: tonight is the last way to get to Wrestlemania and it involves the most dangerous structure.

We hit a long package on the Women’s Elimination Chamber. It’s a big part of the Women’s Revolution (take a shot every time you hear that in the video) as we’ve never had one before. The winner goes on to face someone, possibly Asuka, at Wrestlemania.

Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Bayley vs. Sasha Banks vs. Mandy Rose vs. Sonya Deville vs. Mickie James

Bliss is defending, the entrance intervals are five minutes and it’s Mickie vs. Bayley to start things off. Feeling out process to start with Bayley taking over and hitting an early bulldog. Sonya sends her over the top and onto the cage floor but Bayley jumps onto the wall to avoid some pain. Sonya gets send hard into the Chamber wall for two and Bayley goes up. That sends Sonya back to the floor so Bayley drops the elbow there for two (inside the ring of course) instead. We hit the chinlock until Mandy is in third.

A quick Stunner over the ropes cuts Mandy off and the fans are behind Bayley in the glorified handicap match. Bayley gets taken outside and driven hard onto the floor as the numbers game starts taking over. The double teaming continues with Mandy hitting a middle rope knee to the chest for two. Bayley gets her arms hung up in the wall so Absolution can fire in strikes to the ribs but the clock starts ticking down. Mandy and Sonya actually realize it and are waiting in Sasha, who comes in fourth.

House is cleaned in a hurry and the running double knees get two on Sonya. With Mandy down, Sasha and Bayley double team Sonya into the Chamber. Mandy gets back up and hits a German suplex faceplant (Fan: “THAT WAS DOPE!”) on Sasha, only to get caught in the Bank Statement for the tap at 13:50. Mickie James (in Wonder Woman gear) is in fifth and cleans house, as is the custom for someone joining the match. A hurricanrana from the Chamber wall drops Deville and it’s only Mickie standing. James heads to the top of a pod and it’s a huge Thesz press to get rid of Deville at 17:40.

Not that it matters as the Backstabber into the Bayley to Belly eliminates Mickie at 18:03 (so much for the last few weeks of Bliss and Mickie being friends), leaving us with Bayley and Banks in the ring as we wait on Bliss. Alexa finally comes in and climbs the wall but is surrounded in a hurry. She tries to crawl from side to side and winds up on a pod….but Banks turns on Bayley by kicking her down.

Bliss sends Banks into the buckles though and slaps the heck out of Bayley for two. Bayley is back up and ties Banks in the Tree of Woe for a stomping but Bliss catches her on top in a superplex. Banks’ frog splash gets two on Bayley but she’s back up with a super Bayley to Belly. A rollup gets rid of Bayley at 25:39 and we’re down to two. Twisted Bliss hits Banks’ knees so she fires off knees against the Chamber.

One misses though and Bliss drills her from behind to take over again. Another Twisted Bliss on the floor crushes Sasha but it doesn’t count so Banks reverses into the Bank Statement. They head inside with Bliss driving her into the corner but Banks kicks her down. Sasha looks up to the top of a pod and this isn’t going to go well. Alexa kicks her face first into the pod and an elevated DDT retains the title at 29:42.

Rating: C. It got WAY better once Bliss came in but this didn’t need to be a Chamber match. No one bought anyone but Banks and Bliss (or maybe Bayley) as winning here and Bliss winning was the obvious choice. The Thesz press was a cool spot but the Twisted Bliss should have been the finish. Still though, not terrible and better than some of the men’s matches over the years.

Post match, with Banks crying on the steps, Bliss gives an emotional speech about how this is proof that you can accomplish your dreams. This is for everyone who has ever dreamed big….and none of you will ever accomplish anything. She is the one true goddess of WWE and that is never going to change. Thank goodness, as Bliss is a million times better as a heel.

Braun Strowman is ready to go to Wrestlemania and make Brock Lesnar his little beastie boy.

Tag Team Titles: Titus Worldwide vs. The Bar

The Bar is defending and jump the challengers early on, only to have Apollo hit a big dive to the floor. We settle down to Cesaro uppercutting Apollo for two, followed by Sheamus coming in for an armbar. Cesaro hits a front facelock and brings Sheamus back in for another armbar. It would be nice if they mixed the submissions up but that’s not likely to happen in a cool down match like this.

Cesaro grabs a chinlock and again it’s back to Sheamus for a front facelock. Geez at least pretend to try. Apollo sends Sheamus shoulder first into the post and it’s off to Titus for the power game. Cesaro gets pulled out of the air and Sheamus dives into the Clash of the Titus for two. Apollo’s high crossbody into the standing moonsault gets two but Titus gets sent outside. A chop block into the assisted White Noise retains the titles at 10:03.

Rating: D+. Another standard Raw tag match here, and actually worse than most of their previous matches. The ending was a bit of a surprise but I’d rather a bigger team take the titles from the Bar than a short run team. The problem though is who gets to take those titles from them, as there aren’t exactly a bunch of face teams worth much at the moment.

Trailer for the Andre the Giant documentary. That looks amazing.

Video on Asuka vs. Nia Jax. Nia wants to break the streak and that’s about it.

Asuka by the numbers video.

Nia Jax vs. Asuka

If Nia wins, she’s added to the Women’s Title match at Wrestlemania. Nia wastes no time in throwing Asuka around, including tossing away the jumping armbar. Something like a curb stomp into a running elbow gets two. Asuka strikes away for some effect but gets taken down again in short order. Another armbar is countered into a slam (close to a Jackhammer) but this time Nia isn’t following up as fast.

Asuka’s kicks to the chest are shrugged off for a Samoan drop and another near fall. A big kick to the face gets two and Asuka is looking frustrated. Asuka goes up top but gets slammed down, only to avoid the middle rope splash. The cross armbreaker goes on but Nia rolls over and drives her into the corner for the break. Nia shouts a lot and tries a powerbomb, which is reversed into a hurricanrana to give Asuka the pin at 8:13.

Post match Nia is still livid and drives Asuka through the barricade.

Bliss says no one is ready for her.

Roman Reigns isn’t worried about Paul Heyman’s threats on the Kickoff Show because he’s winning the Chamber and the title.

We recap Bray Wyatt vs. Matt Hardy. Matt was sick of losing and finally became awoken, setting up the battle of creepy characters with weird laughs.

Matt Hardy vs. Bray Wyatt

Matt comes out first and Bray does his appear in the ring entrance….but Matt disappears. We get a Matt voiceover with him saying the words Jeff used to use in Impact Wrestling (you’ll fade away and classify yourself as obsolete). Matt says tonight we delete but Bray can’t find him. Finally Matt pops up and jumps Bray in a bit of an anti-climactic moment. The bell rings and Bray isn’t sure what to do, so Matt offers some applause. The Twist of Fate is broken up and Bray hits his running body block.

We hit the chinlock and it’s BEACH BALL TIME BECAUSE A WRESTLING SHOW NEEDS A BEACH BALL FOR ENTERTAINMENT! It seems to be taken away as Bray stomps on Matt but charges into a boot to the face. A tornado DDT drops Wyatt and the Side Effect gets two. Matt takes too long loading up the middle rope elbow and it’s a release Rock Bottom to take him down. The middle rope backsplash misses though and Matt reverses Sister Abigail into a Twist of Fate for the pin at 9:50.

Rating: C. And that’s it for the feud being interesting, even though this wasn’t all that much in the first place. Matt has lost all of his steam and Bray didn’t have any steam in the first place. Wyatt needs to either go away for a long time or have a crisis and turn face, because this is making things worse and worse every week.

Long package on Ronda Rousey, the same that has aired on Raw.

It’s time for the Rousey signing, with Kurt Angle, Stephanie McMahon and HHH out with her. HHH gives her a big introduction and here’s Ronda, with Stephanie welcoming her as well. Ronda seems taken aback to be here and talks about how amazing it is to be in the ring with Kurt.

We stop for a Ronda chant but HHH wants to get down to business. They’re ready to sign the contract, which will put Rousey on the Wrestlemania card. Ronda doesn’t want to be given anything special so that’s fine with her. I mean, it puts her in Fandango territory. Rousey is about to sign but Angle has a look on his face. She asks if he has something to say and Kurt praises HHH and Stephanie.

They wanted to manipulate her for what happened at Wrestlemania XXXI (not XXI Kurt). Apparently HHH said “three years in the making and now we own the b….”. HHH: “KURT SHUT UP!” He blames the flu for Kurt’s statements and the men leave. Stephanie starts getting serious and wants to sign the contract but Angle says hang on a second. Apparently Stephanie has been calling Ronda a has been and even she could beat Rousey up. Rousey goes to the angry face and backs Stephanie up to the ropes but HHH makes the save. Ronda shoves his arms away too and slams HHH through the table.

That earns her the big slap from Stephanie….and then reality sets in. Fans: “YOU F***ED UP!” Stephanie bails and Rousey signs the contract. This was EXACTLY how it should have been and far better than the Rumble. It’s a perfectly done story and Angle in the tag match (possibly fighting for his job) is the right way to go. Have Rousey break Stephanie’s arm into 34 pieces in New Orleans and everything is fine.

Long recap of the Men’s Elimination Chamber. Everyone wants to face Lesnar and that’s about it.

Elias vs. Seth Rollins vs. Finn Balor vs. Roman Reigns vs. The Miz vs. Braun Strowman vs. John Cena

The winner faces Lesnar at Wrestlemania. Elias has a song for us about how he’s not scared of anyone, including Lesnar, who he’ll beat when he gets his chance. Miz, Balor and Rollins will start things off because quantity means quality. It’s Miz going for the early alliances but his Too Sweet is shot down. Instead it’s Rollins and Balor joining forces, only to roll Balor up for two in short order. Miz’s sunset flip is countered with a basement dropkick for two and it’s time to trade reversals.

Rollins is right back up with the springboard clothesline as Cole mentions Rollins having more pay per view wins in the last five years than anyone else. The Skull Crushing Finale is broken up so Rollins goes with the double Blockbuster for two each instead. It’s Cena in fourth and that means a showdown with Rollins. They talk a lot of trash about how this is to go to Wrestlemania and the shoulder blocks put Rollins down. A ProtoBomb to Miz sets up a double Shuffle. Balor is back in so Cena throws both he and Rollins onto his shoulders. That goes nowhere so Miz gets two on Rollins off the Reality Check.

Cena superplexes Balor and Rollins does the same to Miz, putting all four down until Reigns is in fifth. Miz DDTs Balor and winds up being the only person on his feet, meaning it’s a big circle of YES Kicks. Seth gets sent hard over the top for a crash onto the floor but Roman is back up with a sitout powerbomb for two on Miz. The clock begins and since Elias is left, Strowman is in sixth. Everyone goes after Braun so he suplexes Cena and Rollins (who has a great in pain face) at the same time. Balor is thrown into Reigns and it’s Braun staring Miz down. Miz tries to climb a pod….and STROWMAN GETS UP THERE FIRST!

Braun slams him head first into the Plexiglas and then tosses Miz onto the pile. With everyone else down, Braun stares at Elias, stops to throw Rollins over the top, and then stares at him again. The running powerslam eliminates Miz at 20:00 and we have five people in the Chamber. Elias comes in to complete the field….or at least he’s allowed to but stays in the pod, leaving the other four to pound Braun down.

A QuadrupleBomb with Cena helping Reigns gets two, even with everyone covering. The AA only gets one, the spear gets two, the Curb Stomp sends Strowman to the floor and Balor adds the Coup de Grace. Instead of covering though it’s an AA to Reigns but Rollins jumps Cena. Rollins and Balor crossbody each other so now Elias comes in for some near falls. Elias takes his shot at a few people but an electric chair into a sitout powerbomb only gets two on Reigns. Braun is back up though and Elias tries the electric chair on him. That means a running powerslam and Elias is gone at 26:35.

Rollins saves Reigns from a similar fate and it’s time to go after Strowman again. Cena dives into another powerslam though and we’re down to four at 27:05. Strowman is on his feet while Cena looks scared because HE MIGHT NOT GO TO WRESTLEMANIA! I’M SURE! Balor slips out of the powerslam and hits a pair of shotgun dropkicks to stagger Balor. A Coup de Grace to the back gets two but Rollins hits an enziguri on Balor. Finn is right back with the Pele and 1916 gets two on Seth. Another dropkick puts Reigns in the corner and the Coup de Grace connects but the powerslam gets rid of Balor at 30:24.

Rollins low bridges Braun to the Chamber floor and stomps away with Reigns helping things out. Strowman shrugs them off so Reigns hits a Samoan drop as Rollins goes to the top of the pod. With a look to the Wrestlemania sign, Rollins hits the frog splash for two and everyone is down. Back to back superkicks look to set up the Curb Stomp but instead it’s a fifth powerslam for a fifth elimination at 36:26.

Strowman takes the shirt off and waits on Roman as we hit the GET THESE HANDS chant. Reigns comes at him and sidesteps a charge to send Strowman through a pod (I’ve been waiting for that.). Braun is up so there’s the Superman Punch and the booing commences. Another one puts Strowman on a knee but the spear is blocked. Instead it’s a third Superman Punch and two spears to send Reigns to Wrestlemania at 39:57 to near silence.

Rating: B+. It’s been the same problem for the last year: there is no reason for this to be Reigns other than the script says so. Strowman has been built up for a year now and the fans want to see him. For whatever reason though, WWE would rather try Reigns AGAIN instead of pulling the trigger on what seems to be a big layup. I know Reigns probably has more potential long term, but right now it should be Strowman. We’ve tried Reigns before and it hasn’t quite worked (though it hasn’t failed), but now it should be the logical play.

The match itself was entertaining and I was getting behind Strowman more and more, even if the ending wasn’t exactly a secret. No one else really mattered in the match with Strowman eliminating everyone but Reigns. He looked like a star and should get a huge Wrestlemania match (Cena would be interesting) but the ending took away a lot of the momentum.

Post match Reigns celebrates but Strowman gives him two powerslams.

Overall Rating: C+. Certainly not a bad show but the completely worthless midcard didn’t help things, much like the show, with five matches, SOMEHOW HAVING ANOTHER OVERRUN. Like seriously, it’s 11:20 on a Sunday night. Cut something down or out (four minute intervals would have been a fine idea) but find a way to get these things under control. And in May we go to half an hour longer than this every month? Or will those have an overrun too? Overall though, good show with the main event and Rousey segments being the high points.

Results

Alexa Bliss won the Women’s Elimination Chamber last eliminating Sasha Banks

The Bar b. Titus Worldwide – Assisted White Noise to Apollo

Asuka b. Nia Jax – Hurricanrana

Matt Hardy b. Bray Wyatt – Twist of Fate

Roman Reigns won the Men’s Elimination Chamber last eliminating Braun Strowman

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the 2018 Updated Version of the History of the WWE Championship in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/01/26/new-book-kbs-history-of-the-wwe-championship-2018-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

New Column: How to Give Ronda Rousey a Good Reputation

In case you haven’t heard enough about her yet.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-give-ronda-rousey-good-reputation/