Monday Night Raw
Date: January 18, 2016
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble and that can make for a slower night of Raw. The big story from last week would seem to be Brock Lesnar being added to the Rumble to go after the WWE World Title. There’s no word on where Reigns might be coming in, which opens up some options for Sunday. As for tonight, Brock is the guest on Chris Jericho’s Highlight Reel so let’s get to it.

Martin Luther King video. I don’t know why but they always do some kind of a tribute to this. It certainly deserves the attention but this seems like one of the most important days of the year to WWE.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Roman Reigns with something to say. Reigns talks about this Sunday being the fight of his life but tonight he only cares about Brock Lesnar. Instead he gets Chris Jericho, who Reigns is glad to see even though Jericho isn’t the man he wants right now. Lesnar will be on the Highlight Reel tonight though and Jericho wants Reigns to be there too. Reigns loves the idea but here’s the League of Nations to interrupt.

Sheamus wants to know when this Rumble became Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns. I’m thinking that was last week chum. The League is involved as well and they intend to take back that WWE World Title. Sheamus insults Jericho’s clothes so Chris gets in a weak insult about the mohawk. Del Rio brags about winning the Rumble a few years back but Jericho doesn’t feel like having him on the Highlight Reel either.

Rusev talks about rumbling every single day in Bulgaria but Jericho can’t understand him. Jericho asks Reigns who won the Rumble last year and who he eliminated to win. We get a “comes up short” joke from Jericho and a challenge is issued for right now. Apparently it’s Rusev vs. Reigns with Jericho as guest referee for no real reason.

Roman Reigns vs. Rusev

Non-title. Reigns grabs a headlock to start before firing off right hands. The League offers a quick distraction though and Rusev gets in a cheap shot to take over. That means it’s time for a chinlock though, followed by a nice spinwheel kick for two on the champ. Back from a break with Reigns trying a headbutt, only to get ground down with a headlock. JBL incorrectly says Rusev eliminated half a dozen people in his debut Rumble as I guess even he has tried to forget that worthless cameo in 2014.

Reigns fights back with the corner clotheslines, only to get kicked in the side of the head for a pretty slow two count. Rusev tries a super Samoan Drop but gets countered into a Batista Bomb for the same deliberate two. Del Rio offers a distraction so Sheamus can jump Roman from behind, but Jericho is actually smart and ejects Sheamus anyway. Barrett gets the same treatment and Jericho throws in a bonus cartwheel. In the melee, Reigns hits a quick Superman Punch and the spear for the pin at 13:55.

Rating: D+. This is another match that has been done to death and there’s almost no reason to watch it again. That’s the biggest problem with someone like Rusev: there’s no reason to believe he’s going to win a big match as all he has is the Accolade. Once people start breaking it, all the drama goes away. Not a bad match but really just a way to fill time.

Post break, Stephanie yells at Jericho for not having the authority to make that match. Jericho goes into his standard string of Stephanie insults but she cuts him off to say he insulted her by making the bigger Highlight Reel. Apparently this means she has to negotiate with Paul Heyman and owes Brock more money now. As usual, Stephanie manages to take something interesting and turn it boring.

Brie Bella vs. Natalya

Natalya brings out Paige as this is the Total Divas preview match. Even Cole calls it such. After a clip from the show of drama due to Alicia Fox unfollowing Paige on social media (the highest insult), we’re ready to go with Natalya hitting a quick basement dropkick. That earns her the BRIE MODE knee and a chinlock. Brie spends too long posing after the YES Kicks though and it’s a Sharpshooter to give Natalya the win at 1:30.

Wyatt Family vs. Dudley Boyz/Ryback

Why is this still a thing??? There was a tables match on Thursday where the Dudleys won, only to be put through tables after. We take a break before the bell, meaning the only thing shown between breaks was the entrances. This is joined in progress with Bubba suplexing Harper and doing some Dusty Rhodes punches, only to get kicked in the face. It’s off to Rowan vs. D-Von with the latter grabbing a neckbreaker.

That’s it for D-Von’s offense though as Rowan takes him into the corner so the Wyatts can take turns on him. Bubba starts playing cheerleader and it’s back to Rowan for the double fist head vice. We hit the chinlock from Harper for a few seconds before D-Von collides with Bray. That means a hot tag to Ryback for some house cleaning and everything breaks down. Ryback heads outside to stare down Strowman but gets decked by Wyatt. Rowan breaks up a 3D to Harper, allowing Luke to hit the discus lariat for the pin on Bubba at 6:42.

Rating: D+. Can we please get something for the Wyatts to do already? As in something they might actually win instead of being built up only to fall down again? I’m tired of seeing them beat up the Dudleyz as the matches have ranged from decent to boring and they’re getting lower and lower each time. I’m not sure why we’re seeing it again but I’m sure it’s due to them having nothing else to do. Not a bad match but it’s really hard to care at this point.

Big Show vs. Heath Slater

Before the match, the Social Outcasts promise to win on Sunday, though Axel says he can’t understand a word Rose says. Slater runs away from a big chop in the corner to start but is pulled back in by the hair. The KO Punch is good for the pin at 56 seconds.

The rest of the Outlaws are wiped out post match.

Stephanie gives the League of Nations a pep talk for the Royal Rumble.

Here are Vince and Stephanie to draw out the #1 entrant for the Royal Rumble. Vince brings up winning the 1999 Royal Rumble and Stephanie praises him for a bit. After a quick spin, Vince pulls out a ball and the #1 entrant is……..of course it’s Roman Reigns. Vince thinks that’s quite the coincidence so they pull another name and it’s…….Roman Reigns. They even draw it a third time and leaves Reigns’ name out, only to draw Reigns a third straight time. You had to know this was coming and it’s probably the right call.

Becky Lynch vs. Tamina

Charlotte and Ric are at ringside. Becky starts in with the strikes but charges into a superkick. We hit the early chinlock for a bit before a slam gets two on Becky. Lynch fights back with her usual strikes in the corner, followed by the running legdrops for two. The Disarm-Her makes Tamina tap at 4:04.

Rating: D. Tamina isn’t exactly the one you call on if you want an exciting match. At least Becky won and is getting a good push going into her title match on Sunday. It’s a lot better now that they’ve got an actual story going but the silence during this non-title match really isn’t the best sign.

Post match Becky asks for a Divas Title shot on Sunday but Charlotte says no. Becky gets smart by insulting Ric and saying Charlotte just isn’t like her dad. That’s enough for Flair, who accepts the challenge on his daughter’s behalf. Charlotte really doesn’t seem cool with that.

Kalisto/Dean Ambrose vs. Alberto Del Rio/Sheamus

Here’s your fifteen minute match designed to do nothing more than to kill fifteen minutes. Kevin Owens is on commentary to make this more entertaining. Ambrose pounds on Sheamus to start and it’s quickly off to Kalisto, who is slammed down onto Sheamus for two. Del Rio is sent to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Sheamus hammering on Kalisto in the corner until the masked man jawbreaks his way out of a chinlock. The hot tag brings in Ambrose to start speeding things up, including a suicide dive to take out Del Rio. Dean gets in trouble again though as Sheamus gets two off an Irish Curse.

Del Rio gets the same off a kick to the head and it’s time for some choking on the ropes. A Backstabber stops Dean’s latest comeback but the top rope double stomp is broken up by something like an armdrag. Owens hopes Ambrose hurt himself but Dean is fine enough for a big clothesline to Sheamus and a hot tag to Kalisto.

A headscissors and the rolling kick to the head have Sheamus in trouble and Kalisto stumbles into a tornado DDT. The Salida Del Sol gets two with Del Rio making the save. Dean takes him to the floor and gets kicked in the face, leaving Sheamus to Brogue Kick Kalisto for the pin at 13:20.

Rating: C+. The match picked up a lot near the end until the really stupid booking took over. This is a place where a countout or something would have worked well, or just have Kalisto get another upset pin over Sheamus. It’s not like pins mean anything on Sunday so just do it here and give me another reason to be interested in Kalisto. Or have him look like someone in over his head and take away some of the hype for Sunday. Same thing right?

We recap the opening segment.

Clips of the India tour.

We look at Jericho breaking Xavier Woods’ trombone last week.

Earlier today, there was a funeral for Francesa the Trombone. Big E. starts quoting Jay Z. and Woods loses it. Kofi offers to get a new trombone but that’s too much so soon. Francesca lives forever in Xavier’s heart and she would want Big E. to beat Jey Uso.

Here’s the annual All About The Numbers video.

30 entrants

28 Royal Rumble

811 people eliminations

42 eliminations by Kane, the most of all time

46 WWE Hall of Famers who have entered

8 Hall of Famers who have won

3 wins by Steve Austin

62:12 that Rey Mysterio lasted

1 second that Santino Marella lasted

2 straight wins Roman needs to retain

18 years since that happened

15 former World Champions on the roster

6 former Royal Rumble winners

1, as in the number that Reigns will enter the Rumble

Big E. vs. Jey Uso

Kofi and Xavier are in suits from the funeral. Big E. takes him down to start until Jey jumps over in the corner and starts dancing. A quick cross body gets two for Jey and they head outside, only to have Jey get backdropped on the floor as we take a break. Back with Jey in the abdominal stretch before he avoids the apron splash to send E. outside again.

The running Umaga Attack misses in the corner but Jey settles for a kick to the face for two instead. E. misses another charge and falls to the floor so Jey can nail a nice plancha. Back in and Woods offers a distraction to break up the Superfly Splash, allowing the Big Ending to give E. the win at 9:34.

Rating: D+. Not much to this one but at least the trombone stuff before the match was funny. It’s still not exactly entertaining or anything though as we’ve seen these guys fighting so many times now. The tag division needs some fresh blood and it’s not like there’s a team ready for the main roster down in NXT or anything.

Mark Henry, Titus O’Neil and R-Truth are in the back talking about the dream. Neville comes in and it’s a bit awkward.

The League is talking about something.

Mark Henry/Titus O’Neil/R-Truth vs. Stardust/Ascension/Tyler Breeze

All eight of these guys will be in the Royal Rumble. Titus throws Viktor around to start and it’s quickly off to Neville vs. Stardust with the latter dancing for some reason. Mark comes in and runs Stardust over before Truth comes in to work on a hammerlock. There’s a hiptoss to Stardust but Breeze kicks Truth off the apron to take over.

It’s quickly back to Konnor for an elbow drop but Truth grabs a DDT to absolutely no reaction. Neville and Breeze come in to speed things up with Neville throwing him down and getting two off the standing shooting star. Everything breaks down and the World’s Strongest Slam to Breeze sets up the Red Arrow for the pin at 6:11.

Rating: D+. I know it’s too late for Breeze (you know, three months after he debuted on the main roster) but Konnor and Viktor aren’t available to take that pin? Yeah I’m not even going to bother getting annoyed at this one. WWE has decided Breeze isn’t worth investing in on the main roster and that’s about it for him.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel with Jericho introducing his guests but being cut off by Heyman. Jericho cuts off Heyman’s signature lines and asks where Lesnar is. Brock will indeed be here tonight but Heyman would rather talk about what happened the last time Jericho and Lesnar were in the same ring together.

Jericho gets back to the Rumble though and asks why Heyman tried to get Lesnar straight to the main event of Wrestlemania. Could it be that Brock has developed so many enemies that Heyman doesn’t think he’s a lock to win again? Heyman laughs it off and plugs the Network by saying people subscribe to see Brock fight any one man so why wouldn’t you subscribe to see him fight everyone at once. Jericho suggests that he’ll throw Brock out and here’s Lesnar for a rebuttal.

Before anything can be said or done though, here’s Roman just like he promised. We get the big showdown as Jericho steps to the side and Reigns spears the heck out of Lesnar. Before anything else can happen though, Lesnar has to deal with the League of Nations, allowing Roman to spear Lesnar down again. Cue the Wyatts and the numbers get the better of Reigns but Brock sends the Family after Lesnar. They circle Brock and get in a shot apiece with Sister Abigail’s Kiss leaving Brock laying to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This is always a tricky show to grade as it’s certainly not about the wrestling. The show before the Royal Rumble is about setting up the battle royal and they did that well enough, though they’re making no secret that it’s mainly about Reigns vs. Lesnar. The problem with that is any major surprises can completely change the course of the Rumble so a lot of this might not matter. At least we got some build to the rest of the show, but Sunday is a one match show and the build for that was ok at best. Not a great show but it did enough of what it was supposed to do.

Results

Roman Reigns b. Rusev – Spear

Natalya b. Brie Bella – Sharpshooter

Big Show b. Heath Slater – KO Punch

Becky Lynch b. Tamina – Disarm-Her

Sheamus/Alberto Del Rio b. Kalisto/Dean Ambrose – Brogue Kick to Kalisto

Big E. b. Jey Uso – Big Ending

Neville/Titus O’Neil/R-Truth/Mark Henry b. Stardust/Tyler Breeze/Ascension – Red Arrow to Breeze

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0188BJRGU

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

It’s not the Divas for once.

This is actually a tricky one as it depends more on your definition of the word “worst”. So often, a match that is described as the worst is really more boring than anything else. It’s kind of rare to have a match that really is horrible, but often times boring is a lot worse than bad. Therefore, your mileage might vary here.

We’ll start with a match that actually was bad, at least in its booking: Seth Rollins vs. Brock Lesnar from Night of Champions. This was a nine minute squash with Brock squashing the champ and then a screwy finish as Undertaker came back to get revenge for a match he lost clean a year and a half ago. The story made sense, but I see no need to have the World Champion get DESTROYED to get there. At least have Seth cheat to get in some offense or something, but don’t have him get beaten down that badly. He’s the World Champion for a reason.

Then we have a match that might take this one running away: TNA’s Gauntlet for the Gold at Bound For Glory. No matter how you look at this, it was a twenty four minute Royal Rumble with 12 names (one of which was Pope, who eliminated himself), including Mahabali Shera, Chris Melendez, Tommy Dreamer, Aiden O’Shea and the winner, earning a World Title shot at some point in the future, Tyrus. This was stupid booking (setting up Tyrus as a title contender), stupid planning (the show never recovered after this mess) and just bad in general. We’ll come back to this idea in a bit.

We’ll go back to the mess at TripleMania XXIII with Los Villanos vs. Los Psycho Circus. This was the Villanos’ (youngest member: 50) retirement match as a trio and the match made them look older than their ages. The match was a disaster and the technical issues weren’t any help either. However, I can put this one lower on the bad list because what was supposed to happen here? One team is over 150 years old combined so what are they supposed to really do out there? Yeah it’s a disaster, but it’s a disaster that I feel sorry for.

One more thing before we get to the worst match: I’ve seen a lot of loathing for the Intercontinental Title Elimination Chamber match. I really don’t get this as I found the match to be totally watchable. It’s completely forgettable and was boring at times, but one of the worst matches of the year? Really? The right guy won, the lineup was decent enough and the match wasn’t horrible. I really don’t get the hate for this as it’s really more middle of the road than bad.

Then there’s the match that I think you know is coming: the Royal Rumble. This was the 1993 version all over again as everyone in the arena knew Reigns (Yokozuna) was winning and Daniel Bryan (Undertaker), the only person with a prayer of eliminating him, was taken out early, leaving the crowd to be bored for the rest of the match.

On top of that, you had what looked like a hot finish with a bunch of promising talent in there near the end. Here’s the final ten in the match: Reigns, Rusev, Big Show, Kane, Ambrose, Wyatt, Ziggler, Cesaro, Barrett and Swagger. Save for Big Show and Kane, that could be one heck of a hot finish as the new generation shows that they can take this thing over.

And never mind as Big Show and Kane took out Swagger, Ziggler, Wyatt and Ambrose before being dumped by Reigns at the same time in a moment that was done way better when Shawn Michaels eliminated Yokozuna and Vader in 1996 (a good way to do a Rumble where everyone knew who was winning).

This was a complete disaster with the Rock not even able to save it. Unfortunately this continued Reigns’ push to the main event of Wrestlemania WAY before people wanted to see it (though at least they were smart enough to not pull the trigger just yet). The match was just boring throughout and saves the Gauntlet for the Gold by having so many of the same problems but at over double the time. This one wins and I’m almost scared to look at it again for the redo.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0188BJRGU

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Now this one doesn’t have the ending you might expect.

We’ll start with the most recent as Paige brought up Charlotte’s deceased brother Reid to help set up their title match. Here’s the thing: this was short. Yeah it was a bit tasteless (though nothing compared to some of the stuff WWE has done before) but they didn’t bring up Reid by name or how he passed away etc. This was more tasteless than bad, but the match itself was even worse because they didn’t go anywhere with the hatred. It’s bad, but I think there’s worse stuff they could do.

Earlier in the year in a much bigger story we had Roman Reigns’ original push towards Wrestlemania XXXI. This is one where we all knew what we were going to get but again I didn’t hate it as much as some. They felt like they were trying to push someone new and we got some good matches out of it. The problems here were the feeling predictable and that Reigns hadn’t earned the title yet. However, what people overlook is that he didn’t win it just yet. They bailed out at the last second and that helps things so much more. The ending and the fact that it wasn’t that bad in the first place keeps this away from winning.

Also from late in the year, we had the latest Wyatt Family disaster with Bray kidnapping the Undertaker and Kane, stealing their souls (whatever that meant), taking their fireworks power, and then apparently just leaving them alone so that they could escape and win the match at Survivor Series. As bad as this was, it’s actually pretty low on the list of bad storytelling with the Wyatts and Bray in particular. This is just what happens to the Wyatts and until it changes, it’s hard to really call it horrible all over again.

Then James Storm threw Mickie James on train tracks. It’s stupid, it’s ridiculous, and at the end of the day it’s TNA. I almost feel bad about picking on them at this point and I have issues complaining about anything involving Mickie James. The biggest problem here was that Mickie was back way too soon with no problems, which makes it more stupid than bad.

At Summerslam, Jon Stewart cost John Cena the WWE World Title because he didn’t want Cena to tie Ric Flair’s record. I mean…..yeah. What else is there that I’m supposed to say on this one? You had a talk show host there as the celebrity and then he costs Cena the World Title? At Summerslam? REALLY? This was the best they could come up with?

However, last but not least, we have the love….whatever shape it was with Ziggler/Summer Rae/Rusev. You had Summer loving Rusev and maybe loving Ziggler while Lana jumped to Ziggler from Rusev and thought it was about 1984 with all the denim. This went on forever with the pairs teasing getting back together and the whole thing was a big soap opera, ultimately ending with Lana getting hurt and WWE deciding that EVERYONE followed TMZ and knew that Rusev and Lana were engaged in real life.

And I liked it. Yeah to this day I’m still not sure why, but I really don’t get the hatred for this storyline. I know it’s stupid and I know the story really didn’t make sense and I know the ending was HORRIBLE because WWE pulled the plug on the whole thing but I really didn’t mind it. This gave these people something to do and Summer telling Rusev that they weren’t getting married until he won a title was a good idea. That and it got Lana into some different looks and started to expand her character until the injury derailed the whole thing. I know it’s hated, but I really didn’t mind this story nearly as much as some people did.

For me, the worst was Jon Stewart. The celebrity stuff is stupid in the first place, but to have it be at Summerslam for the World Title and having it wind up as ANOTHER way to remind us how amazing Ric Flair is and how his record is just so sacred was too much for me. I love Jon Stewart and it was cool having him around, but this was just so stupid and such a lame way to keep the title on Rollins.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Unless it’s for the World Title.

Here’s the thing: the ending to last night’s show was supposed to feel different. It was supposed to be a change in Roman that makes it feel like he’s given up on being a nice guy and is just going to start punching his way through everyone. Therefore, the worst thing he could have to do is face Rusev or Barrett or Del Rio, because it would be the same old match he’s had for months now. You need Reigns to look like a killer, not the same guy who has failed for months now.  The only way around this is if he faces someone and beats them in about two minutes tops, but I can’t imagine that happening.

Oh and the show is in Philadelphia. This could be really, really interesting.

Now this is an interesting one as the TV shows are disasters right now but TLC is one of the few shows a year that is almost always worth watching due to the levels of violence and carnage. It’s very much a show built around the in ring action instead of the stories building up to it and that’s exactly what WWE needs right now. Let’s get to it.

Since there’s no pre-show match announced yet (though I can’t imagine we don’t get Breeze vs. Ziggler AGAIN), we’ll jump into this at random and save the main event for the end.

The Wyatts have to go over the ECW guys. Like they have to. As in there’s no way can’t. This should be the biggest layup in the history of big layups and I hope I’m not getting overconfident with it. One would have thought that Fourtune going over EV 2.0 back in 2010 would have been a layup too but Tommy Dreamer pinned AJ Styles because of reasons. Thankfully it’s elimination rules so a fluke is less likely, meaning I’ll go with the Wyatts.

Alberto retains over Swagger in his first defense of the title since he won it back in October. There’s always a chance that the Colter breakup is either a swerve or to set up a reunion with Swagger, but I still can’t imagine that they’re going to put the title on a loser like Jack. The fans wanted to boo Del Rio but he’s right back to being the same dull guy he’s always been. Either make him a big face like he was doing in 2013 (which I still really like) or let him be a jerk who gets to talk about something other than being Mexican. I’ll take Del Rio to retain but watch out for a swerve here.

Rusev over Ryback because they need to push Rusev as a threat for some reason. This Lana reunion isn’t getting them anywhere, which was what I was worried would happen after all those months of people saying “just put them back together” because this isn’t the same dynamic they had in the first place. It’s almost impossible to put a monster back together after he loses (which would apply to both guys here) and they’re not getting anywhere by having Rusev be the same guy he is while getting to make out with Lana. Rusev wins and no one cares.

Charlotte retains over Paige and I guess I’m supposed to boo the champ here. This story has gone from Paige being a jerk over Charlotte’s brother to Paige being just kind of there while Charlotte rants about how awesome her family is. We’re just killing time until we FINALLY get to Sasha Banks on top of the division, or Nikki returning and being all fearless and such. But yeah Charlotte keeps the title here.

Owens keeps the title over Ambrose because we need to have another instance of two guys splitting a series, likely setting up a third match at the last Raw of the year. Why? I have no idea, but WWE loves itself some meaningless trilogies. Thankfully the first match was good so maybe the rematch can be too, but it’s a pretty big drop to go from the main event of one show to a midcard title match on another. It’s almost like WWE doesn’t care much for Ambrose and is going to put him out there to put someone else over every single time and then wonder why his reactions get quieter and quieter.

Then we have what should be the match of the night with New Day defending against the Lucha Dragons and the Usos. Despite a lame buildup with the Usos kind of being forgotten the whole way through, this should be a blast as we have three teams who can fly with the best of them flying with the best of them. Just let these guys go nuts and do a bunch of crazy high spots on a ladder for fifteen minutes and the crowd can go nuts as a result. New Day retains because who are the other teams going to fight since there are almost no other heel teams on the roster with anything.

Finally we have one of the lamest main events in the history of modern wrestling as Sheamus defends against Roman Reigns in the TLC match. Now this has the potential to be AMAZING with two big power guys just beating each other up for twenty five minutes. If there’s one thing Sheamus is good at, it’s having a big power brawl with another guy capable of having a big power brawl. I don’t believe for a second that they actually change the title here as the League will likely interfere at the last minute but at least we’ll have a good match until we get to the lame ending.

Overall TLC could be subtitled “just try and have fun”. The booking is horrible at the moment and a lot of changes need to be made, but it’s pretty clear that we’re not going to get that anytime soon. However, it does seem like we could get something fun this time with the violence and carnage that comes with this show every year. I know it won’t fix everything or even a lot of the problems, but a night of fun brawling and insanity can take our minds off a lot of WWE’s current issues. It’s almost impossible for things to get much worse now so let’s just hope for the best and have some fun.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0188BJRGU

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Let’s get this over with. This past week’s Raw was nothing short of a disaster as the show simply isn’t getting better the people are leaving in droves at this point. There’s no secret that this week’s show was one of the weakest in a long time and did very little to make me want to see Sunday’s pay per view. Let’s get to it.

The show opened with the League of Nations talking about how they were going to take care of Reigns and pals on Sunday. This brought out the Wyatt Family and I was immediately interested. They said they were here for the chaos and a brawl was teased, which could have made things a lot more interesting with the Wyatts moving up to the main event and possibly turning face, meaning we could drop this ECW reunion idea that has been done a doze times.

But no, because that might be too interesting. No instead we got the ECW guys coming out again (with Rhyno coming in to even things up), only to be joined by Reigns and company. This opened up some new dynamics for where the teams could go and the promos could have been interesting.

But no, instead of letting them talk or build up ANYTHING, the match was joined in progress when we got back with everyone in the match at once. Why bother with building something up when you can just give us everything right now and leave nothing to look forward to later tonight? Dreamed pinned Rowan, Sheamus Brogue Kicked Bubba and Reigns speared Sheamus to win, because SCREW YOU World Champion, you need to lose to Reigns like everyone else.

Much like the rest of this show, this was pretty good wrestling with a big middle finger to the fans at the same time. You’re excited about the Wyatts moving up the card again after seeing them get knocked down for the last year and a half? HAHA too bad because you’re getting the ECW reunion instead. You want to see Reigns actually deal with some issues? HAHA too bad because he beat the League on his own last week and then his team beats them here. Don’t worry though because he’ll lose another title shot on Sunday, which is supposed to erase all of Sheamus’ losing over the last few weeks and months.

Instead of trying to give the fans something they’re interested in, WWE is obsessed with just plowing ahead with their back and forth booking that doesn’t get anyone anywhere and that the fans reject more and more every single week. Teasing the Wyatts in the main event scene as faces (an idea the fans LOVED) and then pulling the string on it again is even worse than just leaving it as is. It continues to show that WWE knows what we want to see but would rather go with whatever nonsense they have instead because THAT’S WHAT WE’RE GETTING NO MATTER WHAT.

We’re long past the point where WWE needs to keep teasing something. At this point the show and the company are ice cold and desperate for something to fire it up. Maybe that’s the Wyatts in a face run or whatever, but putting them out there and then having them lose to the ECW guys while Sheamus loses AGAIN before retaining AGAIN on Sunday isn’t the solution, which WWE still doesn’t seem to get. I don’t know when something is going to change, but it’s going to be a long road to the Royal Rumble is that’s when we can finally expect a change.

Stardust and Titus O’Neil did their weekly thing. Again, I’ve stopped caring about this until it actually goes somewhere.

In another good match that did little to advance anything, Kevin Owens pinned Dolph Ziggler, who then pinned Tyler Breeze on Smackdown. So we have Owens coming off looking good while Ziggler is still a loser but Breeze, the young guy who came in hot, looks like even more of a loser because he has to trade wins with DOLPH ZIGGLER. Dolph has been around forever and has lost to almost everyone but Breeze has to lose a series to him because he has to pay main roster dues or something because toiling in NXT for years doesn’t count.

It doesn’t help that this is right around the same time that HHH said on a conference call that they don’t bring up people from NXT without a plan for them. WHAT WAS THE PLAN FOR BREEZE THEN??? The ONLY thing he’s done is continue the Summer Rae story despite there not even being a story there anymore. Is that what they’re going to claim the plan was? If so, we might have set a new benchmark for stupidest line/biggest lie the company has told.

Breeze came up from NXT and is already floundering because they didn’t have anything for him to do and now he’s stuck looking like a loser who loses to the jobber to the stars. Now am I supposed to buy him as a midcard threat? He has no story and a losing record, but I’m supposed to care about him? WWE has made it clear over the years that Ziggler isn’t going anywhere long term (they had him beat the Authority and gave him the Sting rub and he was right back where he was two months later) and now they’re putting him over Breeze? Why? Who does this help? Certainly not the fans as I’m sure you’ve figured out already.

Oh and then Dean Ambrose came out and threw a Coke in Owens’ face because Dean is WILD AND CRAZY. I’m sure Owens retains on Sunday though because he needs to get his win back after Ambrose beat him at Survivor Series and we need to make sure no one looks stronger than anyone else.

Donny Deutsch seemed to end the Miz/Neville story by offering Neville a spot on his new sitcom. Well that’s better than turning Neville heel at least.

Team BAD beat Team Bella because THIS IS STILL A THING. We’re stuck with Charlotte and Paige trying to figure out which one we’re supposed to cheer (more on that later) while Sasha, the most over woman in the division because she tore the house down with Bayley time after time is stuck shouting UNITY with Tamina and Naomi. Yes Naomi, who they’re STILL not doing anything with other than HAVING FUN MAGGLE because she uses the Rear View.

This was yet another five minute match that had nothing interesting, nothing going anywhere, the Bellas having no idea if they’re good or bad, and Sasha being wasted. Charlotte vs. Paige is fine, but the fans want to see Sasha, who could be swapped in for either of the two Divas fighting over the title without missing a beat. Oh but she doesn’t have Ric Flair so that’s out of the question.

New Day came out and did their comedy thing before doing the champions losing thing. Yeah this time it was to the Lucha Dragons to set up the ladder match on Sunday because there was NO OTHER WAY to do this than have the champions lose. Having the Usos vs. the Dragons in a show stealer with the New Day interfering for a no contest so everyone looked equal was totally off the table of course.

MizTV had Charlotte, Ric Flair and Paige as guests. Charlotte is now doing her entitles better than you character from NXT which is what got her over in the first place. Unfortunately no one has any idea if Paige is going to be the heel in this feud or not, despite her doing the whole Reid Flair promo. As usual, the match will be ok if they’re allowed to tear it up but for some reason we’re likely going to have the focus on Ric, just as it always is. It’s another idea that could go somewhere but since they can’t just figure something out, we’re still sitting through a lot of wheel spinning.

Ryback and Rusev’s rematch went to a double countout when Lana was run over again. Here’s this whole feud in a nutshell: Rusev loves Lana, Lana keeps getting hurt and Ryback is fighting Rusev because the script says he’s supposed to. That’s the kind of idea that worked in the Muppet Movie, not on a wrestling show that we’re supposed to buy as real (or as real as it can be in modern wrestling). This is yet another story that is ice cold and has no one behind it because they’ve pulled the rug from under Ryback so many times that it’s almost impossible to get behind him again.

Jack Swagger beat Stardust in a quick match which was only there to allow the split between Zeb Colter and Alberto as well as to set up the chairs match stipulation on Sunday. I don’t think anyone is going to miss Zeb and Alberto as a team but I’m also hoping this doesn’t lead to Zeb and Swagger reuniting. Much like Ziggler, Swagger is such damaged goods that it would be a waste of Colter’s talents when he could build up someone fresh for a change.

Braun Strowman squashed Tommy Dreamer just like you would expect him to. You can forget about the Wyatts vs. the League. That really was just a tease at the start of the show.

Then we get to the part of the show that people remember the most. Roman Reigns came out to challenge Sheamus and the champion followed, only to take forever saying that he wouldn’t get in until the weapons were out. By that I mean he talked about EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. They finally started fighting and the whole thing took twenty minutes, capped off by a spear to put Sheamus through a table to end the show.

For once, and I emphasize FOR ONCE, this wasn’t on Sheamus and Reigns. Austin and Rock at their best would have had trouble getting this segment over. Either that or they would have said screw it and started doing something entertaining instead. It was long and stupid with Sheamus still looking like a coward while Reigns still doesn’t give me a reason to care about him.

The fans were walking out on the segment and I certainly can’t blame them. How was this supposed to make me want to see the match on Sunday? Yeah instead of actually fighting, let’s stand around while they TALK! I can’t remember the last time I saw an episode end this badly, but the worst part is WWE doesn’t seem to understand why it was bad. You had a big match earlier in the show but instead of doing that, they ran with it in the first thirty minutes in a failed attempt to keep the fans away from Monday Night Football. I don’t know who thought this main event was a good idea but they need to be fired, because this was horrible.

This was a show that felt a lot more fun live, but looking back on it there are so many major holes in what they were doing. WWE is in desperate need of a new direction and we’re not going to get it anytime soon. Instead we’re stuck sitting here watching another heel champion run away like a coward while Reigns is STILL waiting on his big moment (which he probably gets at Wrestlemania in a rematch with Lesnar that won’t work).

They need to figure this stuff out and give us something to cheer for already. Maybe that’s John Cena, but something needs to happen before the end of the year because I’m terrified of how low things could get before then. Raw was bad this week, but not bad in the traditional sense. This was bad in the “why am I wasting my time on this” sense, which is the worst thing they can do.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: December 10, 2015
Location: Jacksonville Veterans Memorial Coliseum, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Rich Brennan, Jerry Lawler, Booker T.

It’s the go home show for Tables Ladders and Chairs and the show isn’t looking like the most interesting in the world. Most of the card is set though and that means tonight is all about the build. I have a feeling we’ll be seeing more about the main event, which is a bit of a shame as Smackdown was getting good about building up the midcard. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Roman Reigns vs. Alberto Del Rio

Non-title because I don’t think Del Rio has defended the thing since he won it. Swagger vs. Del Rio on Sunday is officially a chairs match. The rest of the League, Ambrose and the Usos are at ringside. Del Rio takes him into the corner for a kick to the back to start but Reigns pounds him in the head. Alberto comes back with some kicks and a way too early chinlock (Sheamus: “SQUEEZE THE LIFE OUT OF HIM!”). That doesn’t exactly work as Reigns fights up, only to be greeted by what sounded like a Y2J chant.

Reigns takes it to the floor but gets in a staredown with Sheamus, allowing Del Rio to kick him in the ribs as we take a break. Back with Del Rio coming off the top with a right hand to the head for two. With the everything else not working, Del Rio puts on the armbreaker over the top rope for all of four seconds until Reigns powers him off the ropes and out to the floor. As usual, I don’t know why I’m supposed to cheer for Reigns when he can do anything. Well aside from get the ratings up that is.

Reigns wins a slugout (duh) and fires off the clotheslines in the corner. The Superman Punch is countered into the Backstabber for two but Reigns does his rollup into a powerbomb for two. A Sheamus distraction lets Del Rio get in the enziguri for two of his own but there’s the Superman Punch for two with the League pulling Del Rio away. The big brawl is on and it’s a double DQ at 14:38.

Rating: C+. They work well together but as usual this was an obvious ending and not for the title because Reigns is programmed for the World Title and therefore doesn’t care about the US Title. It’s the same, standard operating procedure stuff and I’m getting really tired of it, as are most of the fans it seems.

There’s going to be an eight man tag main event. That’s not all though as we also get a CONTRACT SIGNING between Ambrose and Kevin Owens. Good grief this is like a Greatest Hits Smackdown.

Tyler Breeze vs. Dolph Ziggler

Speaking of the exact same things we’ve seen time after time, here’s Dolph Ziggler in the second segment of the show for I think the third show in a row. Oh and it’s in a rematch too because this was screaming for a trilogy. They fight over arm control to start until Tyler grabs a headlock. A nice running dropkick gets two for Breeze and he starts in on the leg.

Ziggler tries to roll out of a knee bar but gets caught in a half crab instead. With that broken up, Breeze tries to wrap the leg around the post but gets pulled face first into the steel instead (with no mention of this from the commentators because Lawler is reading a line about selfies). Back in and the superkick ends Breeze at 4:44. That was Ziggler’s only major offensive move of the match.

Rating: D+. So let’s see. Breeze arrived about a month and a half ago and already has a losing record in general and to Dolph Ziggler. I’m so glad we saw him go through all that work down in NXT, only to have him come up here and lose a feud to the perennial jobber to the stars, who TOTALLY needed to win this feud. As usual, it’s the same old things that we’ve seen for years that don’t work but they keep doing because they’re sure it’s a brilliant idea.

We recap Ryback vs. Rusev. I’m assuming they’ll fight on Sunday.

Here’s New Day and since it’s Smackdown, this is probably their only appearance for the night. Before their match, Kofi talks about LeBron James just signed a lifetime deal with Nike. Big E.: “Lifetime? As in like it and put a ring on it?” Kofi shows off his shoes as E. gives us a quick commercial. As for Sunday, they’re defending their titles in a triple threat ladder match, but getting the belts off of them is harder than getting Adele to answer a phone call. Why you ask? It’s because NEW DAY ROCKS of course.

New Day vs. Lucha Dragons

Again non-title and a rematch from Raw, though this time it’s Big E. on the floor. Kalisto flips Kofi down to start but both guys try a dropkick to give us a stalemate. The Dragons take over again with Cara monkey flipping Kalisto onto Kofi for two. New Day finally gets it together with Kofi sending Cara to the floor as we take a break. Back with Woods stomping in the corner and Big E. not being able to master the trombone.

We get an awkward sequence where Woods misses a clothesline and then hits it a second later with Cara standing there so he can hit it. Cara lifts Kofi up into a powerbomb (ala Reigns), finally allowing the hot tag to Kalisto as things speed way up. The hurricanrana driver gets two with Kofi making the save. When that doesn’t work, Kalisto kicks Xavier in the head and hits the Salida Del Sol for the pin at 8:14.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have much time due to the break and was another rematch from Raw. Just like with Owens in the Intercontinental Title feud, the Usos have been completely forgotten in this whole thing and should have been in this match instead of the rematch with the Dragons where New Day loses AGAIN. In other words, they’re using the same idea in the Tag Team Title feud that they’re doing in the World Title feud. And people wonder why this isn’t the most well received time in creative’s history.

It’s time for the contract signing for Owens vs. Ambrose. Dean comes out first and has to yell at Owens’ attorney. Owens has an attorney? That doesn’t fit for some reason. Owens has been instructed to not show up tonight because it’s not a safe working environment. Oh sweet goodness with the legal storylines. That’s another trope you can check off the list for this show.

Dean says he was hoping for a quick beatdown tonight instead of having to actually do something. He goes to sign but here’s Owens, blowing off the ploy a good three minutes after it started. Dean is sent into the barricade but whips Owens into the steps and takes out the attorney as a bonus. Owens bails and the attorney gets Dirty Deeds before Dean signs.

Ryback vs. Ascension

Lana and Rusev are on commentary. Ryback throws Viktor around to start and plants Konnor with a spinebuster. The Meat Hook and Shell Shock put Viktor away at 1:29.

If you’re going to do that, BRING BACK JOBBERS! Good grief man. Someone explain to me the reason why we need to beat down a team that could be used somewhere else for the sake of pushing this midcard feud. If you’re going to have someone lose in 90 seconds, bring in jobbers who have nothing to lose. I know Ascension doesn’t have much to lose, but they COULD mean something if they’re built up. Add this to the list of annoying things WWE doesn’t understand that gets on my nerves because they’re so obsessed with this way of thinking and no one comes in and says “hey, that’s stupid.”

Ryback stares at the Russians or whatever country they’re from this week.

Recap of Rhyno returning Monday.

Becky Lynch vs. Paige

Paige’s early headlock doesn’t get her anywhere so she punches Becky in the ribs instead. Some knees to the head set up a chinlock on Becky but she comes back with some hard uppercuts. A double clothesline puts both of them down but here’s Charlotte coming to the ring, complete with full music. The distraction only works on Paige (because they’re feuding you see) and the Disarm-Her makes her tap at 3:23.

Rating: D+. So instead of having the champion get beat, let’s have the challenger get beat so we have even less of a reason to like her. I think they’re trying to make Paige the face here but much like everything else, they have no idea how to make the women likeable either. I’m sure the solution is to have her take credit for the Divas Revolution though and then have her be catty with everyone else.

Long video on Reigns vs. Sheamus. As I’ve said ever since it started: it’s a great Intercontinental Title feud but a lame main event.

League of Nations vs. Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose/Usos

Alberto shoulders Jimmy down to start but Jimmy (who Booker identifies as having the facepaint on the right hand side, even though they’re exactly the same in the ring) comes back with a loud uppercut. Off to Jey vs. Rusev with the Bulgarian taking over as you would expect. Sheamus comes in with a kick to the head and we take a break. Back with Jey having his shirt ripped open for some forearms to the chest.

Reigns has to be held back from interfering but the distraction allows the tag to Ambrose but the fans aren’t ready to react. The middle rope dropkick puts Sheamus down and the bulldog sets up the strikes against the ropes. Barrett finally does something by tripping Ambrose from the floor, allowing Rusev to come in and choke away. Del Rio comes in for another chinlock (he’s a big fan of those tonight) and a Backstabber for two.

Sheamus’ suplex slam gets two and it’s off to another chinlock. Back to Rusev for a bearhug but Dean counters into a neckbreaker. A tornado DDT to Del Rio is enough for the hot tag to Reigns, though the crowd doesn’t seem that thrilled to see him again. Everything breaks down and the Usos take out Sheamus and Del Rio with stereo dives. The spear finishes Rusev at 13:47.

Rating: D+. Totally uninteresting main event here with nothing standing out. Reigns wins again before he gets screwed over on Sunday like we’re all expecting because that’s what the fans want to see: more of the same thing we’ve seen for a year now while we keep pedaling towards the carrot on a string that we can never reach.

Overall Rating: D-. I don’t say this often but this show was a huge waste of my time. I understand that this was the same taping as Tribute to the Troops but this felt more like that “special” (“Yeah it’s for the troops and totally not just us taping a house show so we can feel good about ourselves. USA!”) than a regular show.

Almost every single thing that happened on this show felt like it came from the book of WWE Easy Ideas and that’s not how you ever want a show to go. Between the champions losing, the contract signing and the tag team main event, I saw nothing on this show that makes me care about TLC. Nothing. Not a single thing. I’m sure the show will be fine, but this was a waste of my time.

It’s very clear right now that WWE isn’t trying. I know it happens every year at this time when the creative team basically puts it on autopilot and throws their feet up for the holidays, but this is the kind of show that makes me wonder why I should bother at this time of year. I never had that feeling before but it’s happening almost every November and December in recent years because WWE is stuck with five hours of TV a week and nowhere near enough ideas.

They need to give me a reason to care in a hurry (hint: you can have a face hold the title for more than five minutes in fifteen months) because this is getting old. Stop having champions lose, stop treating these shows like they don’t matter, stop repeating the same matches with guys trading meaningless five minute wins and stop using the same ideas every few weeks and expecting us to care. I usually give WWE the benefit of the doubt (more often than I should) but this is the kind of show that makes me feel like I’ve wasted my time and that’s the last thing I should feel when I’m watching something that should be entertaining.

Results

Roman Reigns vs. Alberto Del Rio went to a double DQ when the League of Nations, the Usos and Dean Ambrose interfered

Dolph Ziggler b. Tyler Breeze – Superkick

Lucha Dragons b. New Day – Salida Del Sol to Woods

Ryback b. Ascension – Shell Shock to Viktor

Becky Lynch b. Paige – Disarm-Her

Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose/Usos b. League of Nations – Spear to Rusev

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0188BJRGU

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 7, 2015
Location: North Charleston Coliseum, Charleston, South, Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for TLC and the big story continues to be Roman Reigns and company vs. the League of Nations. There’s still a lot of the card to be set for Sunday but as usual, you can see most of it from here. The show isn’t looking bad and if they put enough violent gimmicks on the card, everything should be fine. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Sheamus vs. Reigns and last week’s main event. Thankfully Reigns beating them on his own on Smackdown is omitted.

Here’s the League, now with their own music. Sheamus says he can’t look stupid if he’s the World Champion. As for this Sunday, how can he be afraid of defending the title against Reigns if he already beat him in 5:15? The WWE has entered the International Era and Sheamus lists off the four countries represented in the League. You’ll notice there are no Americans, because in 2015, America just isn’t good enough anymore. Sheamus says they’re the best of the best…….and we’ve got the Wyatts?

The fans immediately chant YES for the Wyatts. Bray says they haven’t been introduced because the League of Nations just lives in Bray’s world. They’re here for the chaos but here are the Dudley Boyz and Tommy Dreamer to interrupt. That was close. They almost had something interesting there before we get ANOTHER ECW reunion. Bray says they’re not getting the message that they’re outnumbered. Actually they’re multiplying because here’s Rhyno to even things up. Dang I was hoping for Dudley clones. Before they can get to the ring, here are Reigns, Ambrose and the Usos to make it sixteen people at once.

Dudley Boyz/Tommy Dreamer/Rhyno vs. Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose/Usos vs. League of Nations vs. Wyatt Family

Elimination tag with one man from each team in the ring at once. Harper is quickly sent to the floor as Del Rio takes down Ambrose. It’s off to Jimmy beating on Rusev as D-Von is down in the corner and Harper tags in Bray. There are basically two matches going on at once. D-Von tags in Rhyno for some clotheslines and a suplex to Jimmy.

Strowman comes in to clean house and it’s off to Dreamer, wearing some Dusty Rhodes polka dot pants. Braun is knocked to the floor, allowing Rusev to take Dreamer down. The Usos load up a double superplex on Rusev but Strowman makes it a Tower of Doom with Dreamer being taken out in the process. Rowan tags himself in and takes a quick DDT from Dreamer for the elimination as we take a break. Thank goodness they got rid of the more interesting team so quickly.

Back with Del Rio beating up Jey and Dreamer until Tommy grabs a neckbreaker on the now legal Sheamus. Bubba comes in with a Rock Bottom for two on Sheamus but all twelve come in for a huge brawl. We get down to Rhyno vs. Reigns for a showdown but Rusev and Sheamus break it up. Rusev walks into a 3D and the Dudley Boyz set for What’s Up, only to have Sheamus Brogue Kick Bubba for the second elimination.

Things settle down to Sheamus vs. Ambrose but Rusev tags himself in before anything can happen. Dean goes off on Rusev with strikes (Saxton: “Ambrose is a different piece of toast), followed by the standing elbow drop for two. Back from another break with Sheamus firing off the ten forearms to Jey’s chest until Reigns makes the save.

It’s off to Rusev for a bearhug before Barrett misses a charge in the corner, allowing for the hot tag to Reigns. The fans are WAY behind Roman here (it’s an old NWA town so faces are popular and heels are hated) as he powerbombs Del Rio and Superman Punches Barrett and Alberto. Everything breaks down with a big series of dives and Del Rio gets Reigns in the armbreaker. Jimmy comes in with a Superfly splash for the save and it’s a spear to Sheamus for the pin at 21:36.

Rating: B-. Fun brawl here but the League of Nations is now 0-2 as a four man team and the already weak looking World Champion got pinned when you have three others who could take the fall. Rusev doesn’t even have a match on Sunday and he can’t take a pin here? Another good idea (like having the Wyatts out there) with questionable booking (like having them go out first) bringing it back down a bit when it didn’t need to.

Post break, Sheamus says that’s the closest he’s coming to losing the title. He’s going to smash Reigns up and he’ll give us a preview tonight.

Stardust is raving about Hollywood when Titus O’Neil comes in to say Stardust needs to get some. Well Eden is probably here tonight…….but Titus means some Stardust time, such as reading a good book and having a bottle of wine. Stardust goes on another rant and Titus leaves.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Kevin Owens

Non-Title and Tyler Breeze/Summer are here. Kevin trips him down to start and grabs a front facelock as Ambrose is in the back watching (while eating popcorn and drinking a soda). We hit the chinlock on Dolph until Ziggler counters into a rolling three quarter nelson for two. Ziggler dropkicks him down but gets clobbered in the face with an old Vader style forearm to the face.

They head outside with Ziggler’s headbutt not having much effect. The fall away slam into the barricade give Kevin three straight near falls and it’s time for some big right hands to the head. A kick to Dolph’s face gets two as Dolph keeps pulling himself up. Owens sends him shoulder first into the post for a nine count on the floor. The backsplash gets two more and Dolph falls back to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Owens slapping on a chinlock until Ziggler fights up and avoids a charge to send Owens shoulder first into the post for a change. Kevin is just fine and sends Ziggler out to the floor to try another countout. Dolph starts getting up again though so Owens goes outside, only to take the running DDT on the floor. Back in and Owens throws him with a release German suplex but misses the Cannonball. The Fameasser gets two and they trade superkicks with Ziggler falling on top for another near fall. Owens is right up though and it’s a Pop Up Powerbomb for the pin on Ziggler 19:07.

Rating: B-. Another good match here but it felt more long than anything else. Ziggler continues to be entertaining enough but you’re not going to get anything more than the same stuff every single time he’s out there. I’m really not sure why Breeze needed to be out here as he was just watching instead of actually doing anything. At least we get the TRILOGY match on Sunday because that’s all anyone wants to see right?

Post match Ambrose comes out and throws his popcorn and soda in Owens’ face.

The Wyatts are ready to crush the ECW guys. Strowman wants to become Dreamer’s nightmare later tonight.

Miz comes in to tell Neville that his offer of mentoring was serious on Smackdown. Donny Deutsch (star of a new show on USA) comes in to offer Neville a spot on his show. He gives Neville his card and tells Miz to get back to him in a few years. Miz gives Neville his card but Neville throws it away.

Alicia Fox/Brie Bella vs. Sasha Banks/Naomi

Fox and Banks start things off with Alicia grabbing a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. It’s off to Naomi who takes one as well to send Team Bad out to the floor. Tamina trips Alicia to take over and it’s a dropkick from Naomi for two. We hit the chinlock from Naomi, followed by another one from Sasha. Back up and Alicia rolls over for the hot tag to Brie. It’s time for the YES Kicks before everything breaks down. Another Tamina distraction sets up the Rear View for the pin on Brie at 5:28.

Rating: D. I’m so sick of these matches. We’ve seen them do the same stuff every single week for months now and nothing has changed except for the numbers. Naomi is still doing the same “HAVING FUN” offense, Banks is still as good as anyone in the division and Brie still has no idea if she’s a face or a heel. You would think they would learn at some point but it hasn’t happened in months now.

Post match New Day comes out to give Team Bad their own unicorn horns and everyone dances. Ok then.

The New Day is still in the ring after a break to talk about giving back. They’ve given a donation to the League of Nations and some baby names to Kim Kardashian and Kanye West for their new son. Then they have to give two different teams a Tag Team Title shot on Sunday in a ladder match. Why do they need ladders? They’re not house painters and they’re not saving cats from trees. We get a quick New Day Theater with Big E. playing a tree and Kofi playing a kitten. Woods says that New Day is a group of grown men and saves Kofi from the tree, end scene.

Lucha Dragons vs. New Day

Non-title, Woods is on the floor again and the Usos are on commentary. Cara and Kofi get things going with Kofi throwing him out to the floor for a suplex from Big E. Woods lays on the floor next to Cara and plays some trombone as we take a break. Back with Big E. missing a splash into the corner before it’s off to Kalisto for some rapid fire kicks and the corkscrew cross body to Kofi.

The comeback is short lived though as Kofi takes him into the corner again, only to have Kalisto come back with a sloppy headscissors. The (not) hot tag brings in Cara to really take over off a standing moonsault to Big E. Kofi is legal though and kicks Cara down, only to have the Usos get in a fight with Woods (Jey: “BEAT HIM LIKE HE STOLE SOMETHING!”). The distraction lets Cara roll Kofi up for the pin at 6:36.

Rating: C. That would be the second time in an hour and a half that a champion has been pinned to set up a title match on Sunday. I beg of you WWE, please find something new. There are other ways to set up something like this and it’s getting annoying to see this happen every single time.

The Usos leave with the horns and the trombone. So now they actually did steal something. SOMEONE BEAT THOSE TWO MEN LIKE THEY DESERVE!

After a recap of the opening match, Reigns says he’s fine with having a lesson from Sheamus, even though he has no idea what Sheamus could teach him.

We look back at Charlotte faking an injury to beat Becky Lynch last week.

It’s time for MizTV with guests Charlotte and Ric Flair. Charlotte takes over the introduction for her father and says Miz has ten minutes of Rolex time. Ric says he’s so proud and promises to be in his daughter’s corner at TLC this Sunday. That brings Miz to Charlotte’s new attitude, which sends her off on a mini rant about Miz being sexist. Miz shakes it off and asks about the match on Sunday, bringing up Paige costing Charlotte her friendship with Becky Lynch. He stays at it by asking about Paige saying Charlotte is only here because of her father.

Ric gets up at that but Charlotte yells about Paige, promising to destroy her on Sunday. This brings out the third guest and Paige really doesn’t look too upset. Ric says this is just a ploy so Charlotte goes outside. Paige slaps him in the face and does the strut. Ric: “Get her!” Charlotte charges but Paige runs to end the segment. So…..am I supposed to cheer for either of these two or is this another SHADES OF GRAY story that is in no way a method to keep the writers from having to figure out who they want to turn face?

We look at Reigns pinning Sheamus again.

Ryback vs. Rusev

Rematch from last week. Rusev chills on the floor to start and gets back in at nine. Ryback shoves him right back to the floor as Rusev is holding his back from earlier. Tired of waiting, Ryback busts out a corkscrew plancha (seriously). Ryback: “WE’RE HAVING FUN!” A quick backdrop sends Ryback over the top again and Rusev snaps the arm over the top as we take a break.

Back with Rusev still on the arm by bending it around the ropes and sending it into the post. Ryback’s comeback includes some shoulders followed by a flying shoulder to really mix it up. A middle rope dropkick (better than Brie Bella’s) gets two for Ryback and it’s time for a chase around the ring. Ryback runs Lana over by mistake (Lana may have intentionally gotten in his way) and hurts her ankle again, freaking Rusev out. He throws Ryback in the Accolade on the floor and it’s a double countout at 10:37.

Rating: C. Ryback was trying with some fresh offense out there (always appreciated) but he’s fallen back through the floor in importance again. That’s what happens when you build someone up on a short term basis, have him lose his two big matches and then do nothing with him for weeks. Oddly enough it’s the inactivity that hurts worse than the loss to Kalisto in the tournament.

Stardust vs. Jack Swagger

Titus is on commentary and this is joined in progress after a break with Swagger putting on the Patriot Lock. Stardust makes the rope as Del Rio and Colter come out, allowing Stardust to throw the arm into the post. Some choking on the ropes has Swagger in trouble but he comes back with clotheslines and a powerslam. The Patriot Lock makes Stardust tap at 2:40.

Post match Del Rio nails Swagger. Titus yells at Del Rio to watch out for Stardust so Alberto hits Stardust with a chair. Swagger grabs his own chair and knocks Alberto’s out of his hands before sending Del Rio running off. Jack asks Zeb what he’s thinking but Colter drives off.

This week’s Rosebush is about Miz wanting to mentor Neville. Apparently Miz wants Neville to be recast in Dumbo. Speaking of animals, we saw the return of Rhyno this week. This followed Tommy Dreamer’s, now with a golden tan. He thought he had baby oil but it was really Becky Lynch’s hair dye. This is still such a waste of anything Rose could do.

In the back, Del Rio yells at Colter for causing him to trip and drop the chair. Alberto says he doesn’t need Colter and threatens to use the chair on him. Colter claims that Del Rio wouldn’t be champion without him and drives off. So they’re split now, thank goodness.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Braun Strowman

Braun throws him around to start and drives in some shoulders to the ribs. We hit the nerve hold for a bit before the standing choke puts Dreamer away at 2:46. Total squash at a slow pace.

Here’s Reigns for the big showdown with Sheamus. Reigns asks where Sheamus is before talking about climbing the ladder with his Shield teammates over the years. He’s on top of the ladder and calls Sheamus out for a beating again. Cue Sheamus to say that Sunday is going to be a sequel when he beats Reigns down just like he did at Survivor Series. Reigns is ready right now but of course Sheamus doesn’t want to do it tonight.

Roman wants to know where Sheamus’ potatoes are because all he sees are tater tots. That brings Sheamus charging but he stops in front of the three tables laid against the apron. Sheamus promises to build a castle from all the broken toys on Sunday. Reigns challenges to fight him again tonight but Sheamus knows all Roman wants to do is use the weapons. That’s fine with Reigns (“Hold on a second tater tot”) who throws out all the goodies, one at a time to drag this out far longer than it needs to be.

Sheamus still won’t get in so Reigns keeps talking and it’s FINALLY on after nearly ten minutes of talking. Reigns gets the better of it at first and loads up the announcers’ table, only to have Sheamus take over and send him into a ladder (which Sheamus has to grab before it falls into the crowd). They fight into the crowd and then up to the entrance where all the tables and ladders are set up.

Sheamus blocks a powerbomb and hits him with a chair to take it back to ringside. Roman is thrown over the announcers’ table but comes back with a spear through one of the many tables to end the show. WAY too long here for what they did but points for not having everyone else come out and letting this be about the two of them for a change.

Overall Rating: C-. This was one of the fastest shows I can remember in a long time. The first two hours felt like they took half an hour and the last third wasn’t bad. Unfortunately the majority of the show was ok at best with the action being the biggest problem by far. The wrestling was just ok and a lot of the booking made my head hurt. They did a good job of setting up the pay per view but it was far from an entertaining show outside of that. Not the worst or anything, but a totally forgettable show.

Results

Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose/Usos b. Wyatt Family, Dudley Boyz/Rhyno/Tommy Dreamer and League of Nations last eliminating the League of Nations

Kevin Owens b. Dolph Ziggler – Pop Up Powerbomb

Naomi/Sasha Banks b. Brie Bella/Alicia Fox – Rear View to Bella

Lucha Dragons b. New Day – Rollup to Kingston

Ryback vs. Rusev went to a double countout

Jack Swagger b. Stardust – Patriot Lock

Braun Strowman b. Tommy Dreamer – Standing choke

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0188BJRGU

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 30, 2015
Location: CONSOL Energy Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

We’re closing in on TLC and things aren’t in the best place at the moment. Roman Reigns is challenging Sheamus but also has to deal with Rusev and King Barrett who attacked him last week. That’s really all we have right now but a lot of the pay per view card will likely be set up tonight as the show is in less than two weeks. Let’s get to it.

We open with confetti falling and here comes New Day to stand on a red carpet in the ring. Big E. knows we’re wondering whose birthday it is and even though it’s actually Naomi’s birthday, this is about a NEW DAY. Instead of a birthday, tonight is a gala, a jubilee if you will. Big E. starts to sweat so Woods gives him a Terrible Towel (the symbol of the Pittsburgh Steelers) to clean up. Today marks a new champion: the shamrock shaking ginger giant Sheamus.

Here’s the new champ, in a suit with his hair slicked back this week. Sheamus thanks the New Day for introducing him and then thanks the Authority for giving him this chance. Finally though, Sheamus wants to thank Roman Reigns. If Reigns had only accepted HHH’s handshake, he might have this around his waist. Sheamus does a bit of dancing (Kofi: “The hips don’t lie baby!”) and New Day is amazed at the title changing hands after only 5:15. It’s time for more posing with fireworks but here’s Reigns to Superman Punch Sheamus and walk off with the title. They’re already better than they were last week as this was fun.

Reigns is with Ambrose and the Usos in the back when the Authority comes in. They make him give the title back and Reigns says he’s coming for the title at TLC. That’s not soon enough for Sheamus though because he wants to defend the title tonight. The catch: there’s a 5:15 time limit.

The announcers explain everything we just heard thirty seconds ago. WE’RE NOT THIS DUMB WWE!

Dolph Ziggler vs. Tyler Breeze

Probably time for Breeze to job again so Ziggler can get his win back. Breeze takes over to start and sends Ziggler into the corner for some shoulders to the ribs. We hit a front facelock as the announcers talk about the title match instead of anything in front of them. Ziggler fights up but goes shoulder first into the post as we take a break. Back with Ziggler fighting out of a front facelock and ducking an enziguri.

Breeze counters a hurricanrana into a powerbomb but Dolph slips out, only to nail another enziguri for two. Dolph’s superkick is countered into a catapult, followed by a modified backstabber. For some reason this makes Ziggler hold his shoulder again but he’s still able to counter the Unprettier into a pinfall reversal sequence for some near falls. Back up and Ziggler nails a quick superkick for the pin at 10:33.

Rating: C. Yep you knew it was coming. How did you know it was coming? You knew because this is what WWE does. Breeze got one over on Ziggler so that means it’s time for Ziggler to get one over on Breeze because Breeze might get too popular (despite losing almost all of his other matches) and that must be stopped, meaning we have two guys who are hitting .500 and wonder why neither is over. Such is life around here because this company is stupid.

It’s time for MizTV with guests Rusev and the returning Lana. Rusev is here first and says this isn’t about the USA. The fans want Lana but Rusev says she’s his wife and his alone. Rusev rants about loving her and brings out Lana, who looks exactly like she did about a year ago. Miz asks why this happened after everything they’ve been through but Lana says the past was forgiven when Rusev proposed. Seeing what else was out there just made their love stronger.

Lana NEVER went all the way with Dolph, drawing a YES YOU DID chant from the fans. Rusev didn’t go all the way with Summer either. All he did was break her heart, just like he’s going to break his opponents apart. Rusev and Lana kiss but here’s Ryback for Rusev’s next feud.

Ryback has no business here and no connection to anyone in the ring but Cole and company act like this is totally expected because their script says it’s supposed to happen. Apparently they had a scheduled match, but Cole only threw that in as an aside. Tell us this when Ryback’s music hit so we’re not trying to figure out what’s going on. Anyway Ryback says we fight here so the match is on.

Ryback vs. Rusev

This is joined in progress with Rusev in control. Ryback fights back and hits a missile dropkick of all things. They fight to the floor with Lana getting knocked down, meaning Rusev stays outside for the countout at 1:45.

Rusev blames Ryback for Lana being hurt.

Ambrose has been called into HHH’s office so HHH can tell him that if Reigns doesn’t win in 5:15 tonight, Ambrose loses his Intercontinental Title shot as well. Reign has to learn that his actions affect his friends as well and what better way to show him?

Here are the Dudley Boyz with some tables leaned up against the ropes and covered in black sheets. The Wyatt Family has beaten them up for the last week, including chokeslamming Bubba through a table last week. So many teams have tried to put the Dudley Boyz down and the Wyatts have come very close but they’re still standing and breathing. They pull the sheets off and each one has a Wyatt’s name. D-Von reminds us of the three commandments: thou shall not steal, thou shall not kill and thou shall not mess with the Dudley Boyz.

They’re ready to fight at anytime so here are the Wyatts so Bray can accept the challenge. He advises them to never invite the devil into your backyard because he might stay. Bubba says it looks like the Wyatts have the advantage but the Dudley Boyz have their own family. Cue Tommy Dreamer of all people and the Wyatts bail.

Wyatt Family vs. Tommy Dreamer/Dudley Boyz

Bray is the odd man out here and it’s joined in progress again. D-Von is in early trouble but punches his way out and tags in Dreamer, who walks right into a swinging Boss Man Slam from Harper. Rowan puts on the head vice but misses a splash, allowing for the cold tag to Bubba (D-Von was too busy clapping to put his hand out). Everything breaks down and the referee throws it out at 3:33.

Rating: D+. Of course it was Dreamer. It’s always Tommy Dreamer. When all else fails, there is no one else on the planet that you can bring in for a hardcore match with ECW people involved than Tommy freaking Dreamer. If this is a one off thing or even a two off thing at the pay per view (which it likely is) then fine but this could have been a good introduction for someone new. Instead it’s an old name for the Wyatts to beat up while giving the fans a very cheap pop.

It’s time for a table but Bray gets knocked off the apron and through one instead, allowing the good guys to escape and preserve the ECW legacy for one more night.

We recap the opening segment.

Goldust vs. Alberto Del Rio

Non-title AGAIN. Before the match, Colter says the fans are too concerned with rats on Mars and Anne Hathaway being pregnant. Goldust punches Del Rio in the face before he can say anything and we start fast. A powerslam and spinebuster get two each on Del Rio but Goldust misses a charge in the corner, setting up the top rope double stomp for the pin at 2:00.

Post match Del Rio puts Goldust in the cross armbreaker until Jack Swagger makes the save.

Becky Lynch thinks she and Charlotte could have a great match, non-title of course. They WOO at each other and Ric is here too.

Usos vs. Lucha Dragons

Winners get the title shot, presumably at TLC. New Day is on commentary here as well. Kalisto takes Jimmy down for two to start before Jey comes in for a double elbow. Big E. starts with his reporter voice as the Dragons hit their monkey flip into a 450 for two. Cara speeds things up again as everything breaks down. Kalisto gets backdropped onto Jey but Jimmy takes him down with a big dive. Cue Cara for his own dive but the New Day runs in for the no contest at 2:55.

New Day says that means no title match and it’s time to dance.

Post break, Stephanie makes it a three way match at TLC, but if the Usos want in, Reigns has to win as well.

Brie Bella vs. Sasha Banks

Another Twitter induced match. Team Bad has a new thing where they put their fists together and shout UNITY in falsetto voices. Brie takes over to start but Sasha drops her in a hurry. Alicia gets sent into a superkick and Brie gets sent into the buckle for two as this is already a step off. A clothesline gets two on Brie and we hit a cross arm choke. Brie fights up for her middle rope dropkick and the YES Kicks. Not that it matters as the Bank Statement is enough to make Brie tap at 4:57.

Rating: D. I really wasn’t feeling this one as Sasha seemed like she had to slow things down for the sake of letting Brie keep up with her. That’s the problem with the division right now: half the matches get time but half the matches have to be slowed down and cut short because not everyone is on the same level. This didn’t work for me though and they need to let Sasha get away from Tamina and Naomi already.

Ambrose and the Usos fire Reigns up. It’s going to end in a brawl and we’re going to get an eight man tag for the real main event aren’t we?

WWE World Title: Sheamus vs. Roman Reigns

Sheamus (now in a Sheamus 5:15 shirt) is defending and this match has a 5:15 time limit with Ambrose and the Usos’ title shots on the line. The champ tries to bail to start so Reigns rolls him up for some early near falls. Sheamus takes it to the floor and sends Reigns into the barricade as the clock is ticking. Back in with less than four minutes to go and we’re under 4:00.

Reigns fight up and hits a boot to the face as we’re under three minutes. Sheamus can’t escape up the ramp and a Samoan drop gets two. They head outside again with two minutes left and Reigns is thrown over the announcers’ table. Sheamus gets posted but the time is ticking away. Roman finally gets him back in with a minute to go. The Superman Punch is loaded up but Rusev pulls him to the floor at 4:40.

Rating: D+. Yeah this was obvious. You knew they weren’t going to change the title on Raw (because that might make people watch) so let’s just do this and then set up the obvious eight man tag later on in the show. Sheamus vs. Reigns is fine and they’re doing what they can with it but Sheamus losing again at the pay per view is going to make it even worse.

Barrett, Del Rio and Rusev huddle around Sheamus, who calls the four of them the League of Nations. Cue the Usos and Ambrose to even things up and Sheamus gets punched off the apron.

Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch

Non-title with Paige on commentary and Ric Flair in Charlotte’s corner. Becky grabs the wrist to start and takes Charlotte down with a headlock takeover. Charlotte pops up and it’s a standoff as Ric struts on the floor. They hit the mat for more headlocking until Charlotte chops her in the stomach. The neckbreaker sets up more chops but Becky kicks her in the chest. Paige gets annoyed at all the questions and threatens to put Byron in a submission on the table right now. Charlotte twists an ankle coming out of the corner but it’s all goldbricking, allowing Charlotte to grab a rollup for the pin at 4:40.

Rating: C-. So they might be turning Charlotte heel? That’s their big solution? Becky continues to lose, but they’re at least offering some shades of gray here to make things a bit more interesting. Hopefully Ric is just a one off appearance here because he doesn’t need to be around Charlotte, who is good enough on her own. Just don’t have her talk live again.

Becky is stunned and more than a big annoyed.

The eight man tag is announced for the main event.

Post break Becky wants to know what that was but Charlotte calls it strategy. This isn’t NXT anymore and everyone needs to step it up. They’re still friends though. Charlotte leaves and Paige comes up to gloat a bit, leaving Becky conflicted.

Adam Rose has a gossip segment called The Rosebush. Rose thinks Rusev wears the bra in his relationship with Lana and suggests that Ziggler loves both Summer Rae and Breeze.

Titus O’Neil sings Christmas carols to Stardust and tells him to get in the Christmas spirit before shoving him down. We’ll go with a holiday ok then here.

Usos/Dean Ambrose/Roman Reigns vs. League of Nations

The good guys don’t get an entrance. We’re not quite ready to go yet because here’s the New Day to announce they’re now part of the League of Nations to make this a 7-4 handicap match. Kofi and Dean get things going and it’s Ambrose in early control with left hands in the corner. It’s off to Jimmy vs. Woods and the Usos and Reigns start a quick Unicorn Stampede to turn the tables. The big staredown takes us to a break.

Back with Del Rio kicking Jey into the corner and tagging out to Woods. A clothesline gets two and it’s off to Rusev for some stomping on the leg. The beating continues with Sheamus for the ten forearms to the chest. Reigns finally tries to make the save but Jey has to save himself with an uppercut to knock Kofi out of the air. The hot tag brings in Jimmy to clean house but Big E. clotheslines him from the apron. Jey is holding his knee on the floor as we take another break.

Back again with Jey having been taken to the back because of his knee. Jimmy is still taking a beating but he finally gets away to make the tag to Reigns as house is cleaned. Everything breaks down though and Reigns hits the apron kick to Kofi and Xavier, only to have Del Rio send him into the barricade. That means it’s time for Reigns to get beaten down, including a knee drop from Sheamus for two.

Big E. puts Reigns in an abdominal stretch for some rhythmic slapping to the ribs. Reigns gets run over again and it’s off to Del Rio for a chinlock to keep this slow. We see Jey on the floor, because when Cole meant he was taken out he meant he was down. Close enough I guess.

Reigns finally gets up and makes the hot tag to Ambrose to take everyone out. Dean dives off the top to take out New Day and Barrett before a suicide dive does the same to Sheamus. The Superman Punch drops Del Rio and Reigns adds a clothesline to Barrett but seemed to be holding his knee. Back in and a Brogue Kick puts Ambrose away at 25:10.

Rating: B-. This was a good brawl to end the show and make the League of Nations seem like a threat for a change. I’m not sure why New Day needed to be in there but anytime those three are on my TV I’m happier than I was otherwise. Sheamus getting the pin is a good idea, but you would think an Uso would have been a better option. Good, long match though and a much better option than just Rusev vs. Reigns from last week.

Post match Reigns comes in for the save (thankfully his leg seems fine) but gets beaten down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The major difference here is simple: there was a point to almost everything. Last week felt like they were just throwing out random stuff to fill in time and that’s not how Raw is supposed to go. This week felt like they were building up to something instead of just wasting time until the next big show came. There are still a lot of problems with the show but it helps to have a point to stuff. Reigns vs. Sheamus is looking better, but you can see the screwjob from here.

The rest of the show was hit or miss at best, but there was enough good on here to make it work. The key thing here is it was better than last week, which really isn’t a hard bar to get past. They’ve done a good job of setting up TLC as you can see most of the card from here and the League of Nations is a good idea but the show is still hitting its head on a low ceiling because these stories don’t have a lot of room to go anywhere.

Results

Dolph Ziggler b. Tyler Breeze – Superkick

Ryback b. Rusev via countout

Dudley Boyz/Tommy Dreamer vs. Wyatt Family went to a double DQ when all six brawled

Alberto Del Rio b. Goldust – Top rope double stomp

Usos vs. Lucha Dragons went to a no contest when New Day interfered

Sasha Banks b. Brie Bella – Bank Statement

Roman Reigns b. Sheamus via DQ when Rusev interfered

Charlotte b. Becky Lynch – Rollup

League of Nations/New Day b. Usos/Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose – Brogue Kick to Ambrose

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0188BJRGU

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

It’s been a bit since I’ve done one of these for Raw but the show has been so pitiful lately that I figured it was time to take another look at it. The show’s ratings are pathetic and it should be interesting to look at how screwy the show has been to see why they’re in such a horrible place (even though they’re making bank with the sponsors etc.). We’re fresh off Survivor Series, meaning Sheamus just cashed in Money in the Bank because of reasons. Let’s get to it.

The show starts and it immediately goes off a cliff. Here’s the problem: Sheamus is Seth Rollins with pale skin and an annoying accent. The Authority came down to gloat, the new champion came out to say I TOLD YOU SO, the hero challenger came to the ring and issued a challenge, which was eventually accepted for the hardcore based gimmick pay per view.

In other words, it’s the exact same thing that Rollins did when he set up his match with Randy Orton at Extreme Rules 2015. That’s bad storytelling all around because you could call out every single thing that was going to happen in the opening twenty minutes of this show from the second that Sheamus kicked Reigns in the face the night before.

That’s where Raw is having its biggest issues right now: it’s so predictable. They have been using this same format for so many years and you can just swap in the characters you want. Why should I care that Sheamus is now going to be HHH and Stephanie’s lapdog instead of Rollins? Now we get to see Sheamus go out and work really hard in a match so he can get the Authority’s praises and go see them like a four year old that wants his dad’s approval. You could see the Authority talking down to everyone again with Stephanie ripping Reigns’ balls off because that’s all she does these days.

Of course there will be no repercussions because the Authority is on a higher plane than everyone else so they can’t be touched. HHH might do a match at Wrestlemania and put someone over (Unless they’re Brock Lesnar because then the fans needed to see HHH get his precious win back. Or if they’re Sting and the fans weren’t absolutely certain who won the Monday Night Wars, which the match was about because Stephanie said so.) but it’s happening once a year because HHH is too busy doing wacky fun stuff like dancing to make the crowd cheer or bequeathing the Pedigree to Rollins so Seth can get a rub.

The Authority taking one loss every few months doesn’t change anything about them. It makes them look like they’re treating a top star like a charity case. If Rollins or Reigns beat them at Wrestlemania, it would change absolutely nothing because HHH would go into war mode for a big rematch that no one would care about because the Authority will be right back to normal with their charity of the month and doing nice things for the crowd because they’re faces one week and serious businessmen the next week. As long as those two stay over though, Raw has accomplished its main goal. Until that changes, Raw isn’t getting better.

As for the actual story of the night, Rusev came down and attacked Reigns to set up the main event. Yeah after all that, we get a match that has no real drama and will only end in a DQ or Reigns getting a pin. There’s also nothing on the line and the new champion isn’t in action. Therefore, there’s no reason to watch. Reigns is part of the problem here but it’s much more that it’s a predictable story. The fans have learned that this kind of story isn’t going anywhere until at least after TLC because we’re going to have the Authority interfere and let Sheamus keep the title, setting up the Rumble. Why watch until then at the earliest?

The Dudley Boyz beat the Wyatts via DQ in a quick match. This seems to set up a feud, which makes me shake my head even more. If you were moving the Wyatts into a feud with the Dudleyz, do a Survivor Series match the night before with the Dudleyz, Bray and Strowman getting counted out or disqualified, leaving you to do the same finish that you did with Harper taking the final fall. It sets up the feud and protects Bray while still giving us the Undertaker moment. Everyone wins, but as usual we got the lamer idea because that’s how WWE works.

Sasha Banks pinned Becky Lynch with a handful of trunks (which Cole was too busy schilling stuff to notice). After that WAY too long opener and all the Undertaker videos, this got four minutes. “Yeah we want you to revolutionize the division. Here’s four minutes with no mic time or a character for either of you. Go rock it!”

Then the New Day came out and made fun of country music for about ten minutes. This was supposed to include an open challenge but New Day canceled it when the Lucha Dragons tried to accept. The Usos came out as well and it seemed to be setting up a three way match (possibly with a ladder and probably the Ascension) at TLC, but there was nothing tonight. In other words, more time being wasted on something that doesn’t really go anywhere.

However, there’s one more major thing here: Kofi said that he hated country music and it wasn’t even his character talking because he REALLY hated country music. How do you even respond to that? I understand the kayfabe is dead, but this is running out there and holding up a big sign that says “HEY! YOU DO KNOW THIS IS ALL FAKE RIGHT??? LIKE, KOFI KINGSTON IS TOTALLY A NICE GUY AND YOU DON’T NEED TO GET ANNOYED AT US OVER HIM!”

This screamed of trying to make it seem like Kofi was a jerk instead of just having him play one and letting us get immersed in it. The idea has worked for years but now we have to tinker with it for some reason because the fans are too smart. Yeah there are smarter fans, but there are also a lot of fans who either aren’t smartened up (they’re called kids) or a bunch of fans that like to be swept up in the whole idea (they’re called the majority). Stop trying to reinvent the wheel.

Neville pinned Mark Henry in a quick match. Henry showed him respect after the match and that was that. This might be the start of a Henry retirement angle but as of now it seems like another match that didn’t mean much. I like that actually as it’s nice to just have a match for a change instead of having an angle and a story involved in every single thing that happens.

The Prime Time Players and Goldust beat the Ascension and Stardust. It was short and it was meaningless, but in this case it was boring. Not everything can work.

Del Rio and Colter did their weekly thing and no one cares. Like seriously, no one cares. It’s the most boring thing on the show every week and I have no idea where it’s supposed to go. Colter is awesome on the mic but he’s got NOTHING to work with here. Oh and then Swagger came down and went after Del Rio again. This brings up another problem for WWE: they give someone a gimmick and that’s what they’re stuck with for good. This feud could have gone to anyone that they make into a patriot but instead we’re getting Swagger, who will lose in the end because that’s what Swagger does.

Charlotte and Paige had a much better rematch than the mess they had the previous night. They actually acted like they wanted to hurt each other instead of having a lam wrestling match, which made for a much better story. The ending helped as well with a double countout to likely set up a big brawl at TLC. It makes you wonder what they were thinking at the first pay per view match, but it was probably them letting them calm down after the whole Reid Flair fiasco.

Ryback beat up Heath Slater in another filler segment. Not a match of course, but a segment.

Ambrose/Ziggler beat Owens/Breeze in ANOTHER midcard tag match that barely went anywhere. This was to help set up Owens vs. Ambrose for the title, so of course Breeze had to take yet another pin. Breeze is another great example of a guy that has been crippled coming out of the gate because he’s a fresh name for the bigger stars to beat and since they only know a few ways to build up a challenger (beat the champ or beat the same guy over and over), this is what we’re stuck with.

Then Reigns beat Rusev via DQ in a long, dull main event with King Barrett interfering. Did this mean that Reigns was fighting more adversity? Of course not as he cleaned out Sheamus, Barrett and Rusev AFTER they beat him down. That’s how the show ends: with Reigns looking like he’s about to deal with even more midcard goons who aren’t going to beat him before he gets to fight for the title, where I’m sure he’ll get ripped off again before he wins the Rumble and likely fights Lesnar and wins the title at Wrestlemania XXXII.

In other words, we’re going another few months before Reigns finally gets there. The problem is we’ve been doing that same story for over a year now and the fans are on the verge of giving up on him. There’s a large group of fans that want to see Reigns, but so many of them are just fed up with having him lose and then deal with some midcard feud before going after the title again and then starting another midcard feud when he gets screwed over. They need to do something and do it soon because this stuff is really old.

Overall Raw was a total mess. In addition to the completely predictable opening and main event developments, we have the huge gaping holes due to all the injuries. Since this is WWE, we certainly can’t give the other Divas match more time or bring in some people from NXT for a showcase match or an angle that changes things up a bit. No instead we’re getting Heath Slater and New Day making fun of country music because it makes Vince laugh.

The big idea here is that the show is stale. It’s the same formula and the same ideas that we’ve seen forever but there’s no indication that they’re going to switch it up. We’re at the point where Raw opening with a match is considered shaking things up. How am I supposed to get excited for a show when I have to wait twenty minutes to get to the first match because HHH needs to say “I told you so” and Stephanie needs to screech at whoever she’s adding to her collection this year? How is that good television?

Apparently a lot of people don’t think it is either and the ratings are showing it. Another bad show this week and something they need to fix in a hurry before it gets even worse. It’s something they could fix easily too, which makes the shows that much more frustrating. Just stop doing the same stuff over and over and the show will feel better, which is half the battle already.

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