Monday Night Raw
Date: February 9, 2015
Location: Schottenstein Center, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Booker T., Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We have a much better idea of what to expect at Fast Lane after last week and the Daniel Bryan fans have a lot more hope going forward. There are two weeks left before Fast Lane, meaning it’s all about the build to the show. It’s going to be interesting to see how Reigns handles his adversity last week going forward. Let’s get to it.

We recap last week’s events with the Authority making Bryan vs. Rollins for the shot at Reigns at Fast Lane.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Roman Reigns and we look at his events from last week. Roman says he stood in this ring last week as the #1 contender for the World Title at Wrestlemania, meaning the title was as good as his. Then the Authority showed up last week and made it clear that they don’t want Reigns in that spot. That’s fine with Reigns because he has more than enough spears to go around.

Cue Bryan who thanks Reigns for the help against Rollins and to say he’s ready for Fast Lane. This brings out the Authority to bring up Reigns’ lost last week and rip on Bryan for putting Kane in the casket. Bryan: “Given what your husband has done in caskets, I thought you would enjoy it.” Stephanie makes Reigns/Bryan vs. Kane/Big Show right now. Now I know this sounds bad, but think of it this way: if they do this match, neither guy can wrestle again later. Just get it over with at the same time.

Roman Reigns/Daniel Bryan vs. Big Show/Kane

Bryan sends Kane to the floor to start for the Flying Goat and it’s quickly off to Reigns vs. Big Show. The Authority takes over in the corner with their variety of right hands and forearms, followed by Kane’s bad chinlock. Even the director gets bored with this one so they go to a clip of the spear to Big Show last week. Reigns fights out and suplexes Kane down, setting up the double tag to Bryan and Big Show.

Daniel busts out all the kicks and sends him to the floor with the big YES Kick. Kane and Show easily catch him in the air though and send Bryan back first into the ropes as we take a break. Am I missing something or did Bryan just go down to the equivalent of an Irish whip? Back with Big Show holding Bryan in a chinlock before it’s off to Kane for a bearhug. STOP PUSHING THESE TWO ALREADY! Big Show misses the Vader Bomb elbow but Kane breaks up the hot tag attempt. That earns Kane a YES Lock but it’s Show pulling Bryan to the floor. He throws Bryan into the timekeeper’s area for a fast DQ at 12:00.

Rating: D. The match was boring but as usual, the main issue here is these feuds still going for no reason other than the script saying they have to. Big Show and Kane are as dull and uninteresting of a pair of guys as I’ve seen since Bundy and Studd, and this is a far different time than their era. And, to go back to an old standard, was there ANY REASON why Kane didn’t tap out here? This just had to be a DQ?

Post match Reigns destroys Show with a chair but gets knocked into the corner by Kane. Bryan tries the running dropkick on Kane but hits Reigns by mistake. Roman shoves him down, so HHH makes Reigns/Bryan vs. Kane/Big Show/Mercury/Noble/Rollins. DEAR GOODNESS WHY DO I HAVE TO SIT THROUGH THIS AGAIN???

Seth Rollins vs. Ryback

Rollins, the fifth guy to work two matches tonight so far, quickly knocks him onto the floor to start before putting on a front facelock back inside. Ryback shoves him to the floor and fights off the Stooges, only to have them break up the Shell Shock attempt for the DQ at 2:59.

Ryback gets curb stomped post match.

Sheamus is coming back.

Paige vs. Brie Bella

Freaking BRIE MODE is back. I was told that was leaving and now I have to hear it again. I hate this company at times. Brie kicks her down for two to start and hits the running knee to chest (which is close enough to Bryan’s finisher to make it a nice idea) for two more. The middle rope dropkick gets the same as Paige hasn’t had any offense so far. A double slap staggers both girls but a Nikki distraction backfires, setting up Rampaige for the pin at 3:14.

Rating: D-. The Bellas are such a disaster on top of the division. They’ve actually gotten a bit better in the ring, but my goodness they’re the least interesting act I’ve seen in years. This idea that they’ve fought so hard to get to the top of the division doesn’t hold up and their matches are some of the worst messes I’ve seen in a long time. But they make the top stars happy and that’s all that matters.

Here are Rusev and Lane to pay tribute to John Cena. After some microphone feedback, they agree that Cena has accomplished great things in WWE and just like the Oscars or Grammys, they want to acknowledge someone who has done so much. We get a quick montage of Cena winning before going to clips of some of his worst beatings. Lana wonders how Cena can keep going through all this punishment over the years. Rusev talks about how Cena is no longer full of ruthless aggression and is now just a weak nothing. He’ll break Cena at Fast Lane and crush his spirit.

Cue Cena, sporting a black eye for a rebuttal. He says Rusev thinks he’s already won the match at Fast Lane, so why bother having the match at all? It’s because so many people are sick of hearing Rusev and Lana run their mouths all over the place. Yeah Cena has taken some beatings over the years and suffered a lot of injuries but he keeps getting back up. Cena is going to hit Rusev in the mouth at Fast Lane and adjust his attitude. Some more trash talking leads to a brawl with Cena getting the better of it until Rusev gets in a shot to the bad eye and sends him into the set. This was fine.

Bray Wyatt vs. Dolph Ziggler

Rematch from last week. Ziggler goes for the leg to start and the fans are split on who to cheer for, though Dolph’s cheers are louder. A dropkick sends Bray into the ropes but he elbows Dolph in the jaw to take over. Dolph avoids a charge in the corner and scores with a neckbreaker before snapping Bray’s throat over the top rope as we take a break.

Back with Bray holding a chinlock before hitting that running cross body. There’s something to be said about someone just launching themselves at their opponent. Dolph ducks a big clothesline and nails another dropkick to put both guys down. The Fameasser and a superkick get two on Bray but he takes Ziggler’s head off with the clothesline on the floor. Back in and the Spider Walk sets up Sister Abigail for the pin at 11:40.

Rating: C+. This was good, though the same thing as last week. Bray looked like his old monster self here though and it was one of the more entertaining things I’ve seen from him in a good while. Ziggler’s push coming off Survivor Series has been a complete waste, but does that really surprise anyone?

Junkyard Dog Black History Month video.

Here are Lesnar and Heyman to address the Fast Lane situation. Heyman brings up the Brian Williams controversy and calls Reigns and Bryan the biggest liars in the land. Both of them say that they’re fighting for a chance to go to Wrestlemania but they’re just lying to themselves. Let’s start with Roman Reigns: the most violent dude from the most violent tribe from the most violent island in all of Samoa. Heyman stood next to him and it was clear that Reigns was terrified of Lesnar.

Then there’s Bryan, who clearly has no chance against Lesnar. It’s not just the size difference because Bryan can back it up with ability and can pull off miracle after miracle, but do you really think he’s the one to beat the one in twenty one and one? Let’s get to the point: whoever wins the match at Fast Lane should jump in a helicopter with Brian Williams and subject themselves to enemy fire, because it will be less dangerous than the F5 waiting for them at Wrestlemania. Again, this was fine.

New Day vs. Goldust/Stardust

Woods is on the floor again. Kofi and Stardust get things going with the painted one scoring with a shoulder and cartwheeling. Goldust tags himself in and that’s already enough for Stardust, who walks out. Kofi gets the pin off a rollup at 1:38.

We look back at Reigns and Bryan having issues earlier tonight.

Bryan says he probably would have done the same thing to Reigns in the heat of the moment. Roman comes in and says they should work together tonight so they can handle their business at Wrestlemania. Daniel doesn’t react.

Post break Goldust says this is Dustin talking and says Cody is his brother. Stardust shoves him and says Cody is dead.

Here’s HHH to address Sting. He’s been around this company for twenty years to make this a better place. Now he has to deal with the face of WCW, a company he helped destroy fourteen years ago. Then at Survivor Series, Sting had to attack like a coward. That’s why HHH is calling him out at Fast lane to meet him face to face so he can explain to Sting why he was right to wait. If Sting shows up, he’ll be allowed to leave with his face intact and never come back again.

The lights dim and a crow is heard. We go to a creepy video with HHH talking and Sting paint superimposed over his face. The fans want Sting and we see someone in the ring (clearly not the real Sting) who scares HHH so badly that he falls down. The words I ACCEPT appear on the screen and the guy is gone.

Usos vs. Tyson Kidd/Cesaro

Non-title again and Cole says the rumor is a win could get Kidd and Cesaro in the title hunt. Lines like those are what make me hate WWE commentary. Jimmy slams Kidd down to start and it’s off to Jey as the announcers talk about the double date from Smackdown. Everyone falls out to the floor and the girls get in an argument as we take a break. Back with Jimmy suplexing Kidd but Cesaro breaks up the tag.

The heels take turns putting on chinlocks before Cesaro just hammers Jimmy’s face. Jimmy scores with an enziguri to knock Cesaro outside and the hot tag brings in Jey to face Kidd. Tyson blocks a dive but jumps into a superkick for a close two. The Running Umaga Attack misses and Cesaro shoves Jey off the top to give Kidd the pin at 10:37.

Rating: D+. GET. NEW. WRITERS! For the love of all things good and holy I’m so sick of seeing challengers beat the champions to get a title shot. Shut up with this nonsense about “getting a win to get in the title hunt” because THERE IS NO FREAKING TITLE HUNT! You have three teams having the same matches over and over again and see the division die more and more every single day. The Usos losing here makes the titles look even weaker, and now I’m supposed to want to see these teams fight again just because the worthless titles are on the line?

I would suggest that Kidd and Cesaro beat some teams to earn a title shot, but who are they supposed to beat? New Day? Los Matadores? As in the teams that have lost so many times that the wins mean nothing? We have probably ten people down in NXT spinning their wheels who have been ready for the big show for months but there’s just no room for them on the main roster? Are you kidding me? Get someone new in there so we can stop doing these same stupid ideas over and over again.

Rikishi is announced for the Hall of Fame. The loser Usos dance to celebrate. Does no one think before they map out these shows?

Damien Mizdow vs. Sin Cara

Miz makes Mizdow take off the sunglasses because he isn’t the stunt double anymore. Damien takes over but gets sent outside where Miz requests a water. That’s not enough thought as Miz wants him to open the water. The distraction lets Cara hit a dive over the top to take over as Miz isn’t very interested. The Reality Check puts Cara down but Miz freaks out over the Figure Four, allowing Cara to small package Mizdow for the pin at 3:43.

Rating: D+. This was story development more than a match, but instead of doing something like having Mizdow be better than Miz, we have Mizdow lose to give us yet another loser to cheer for, because, again, THE FREAKING WRITERS DON’T THINK THROUGH THIS NONSENSE BEFORE THEY THROW IT ON TV!

Bray Wyatt asks where we go when we die. Some say we become part of the earth, but some say we go on to eternity. People like him and whoever he’s talking about though are stuck on earth for the rest of time. They don’t belong here but Bray doesn’t fear him. He pities the man he speaks to because it’s time for that man to go home.

Sheamus is still coming back. Nothing has changed in the last hour and a half.

Dean Ambrose vs. Curtis Axel

In case Axel getting squashed on Smackdown didn’t get the idea through your head. Axel says no one is going to take this from him, not even Kanye West. Dean hammers him up against the ropes to start but Axel knees him in the face and rubs Dean into the mat. We hit the early chinlock but Dean fights up with the rebound clothesline and Dirty Deeds for the pin at 2:40. The match was nothing special, but they lost me when I was told Axel was a third generation sports entertainer.

Dean won’t stop until he gets his Intercontinental Title shot. Barrett pops up and says the BNZ (Bad News Zone) still says Dean gets no shot.

Daniel Bryan/Roman Reigns vs. Big Show/Kane/Joey Mercury/Jamie Noble/Seth Rollins

Here’s your “we have nothing else so here’s a big mess” main event. The five rush the two before the bell and it’s a big brawl to start. A double chokeslam plants Reigns and of course none of this warrants a DQ, meaning Bryan pulls himself up to start with Rollins. Seth talks a lot of trash and it’s off to Big Show for a slam. Reigns is nowhere in sight after the pre-match attack.

Noble comes in and gets sent into the middle turnbuckle but Mercury comes in to keep control. Seth has to break up a YES Lock and it’s off to Kane to continue the feud that will not die. Reigns finally gets up and starts beating people up but Big Show KO’s him with ease. A buckle bomb gets two on Bryan and the giants load up the announcers’ table.

Cue Ryback, Rowan and Ziggler for the save and the match…..isn’t thrown out despite three people interfering and fighting three legal men to the back. It’s the Stooges vs. Bryan now with Reigns still down. The running knee is loaded up but Reigns tags himself in and spears Mercury for the pin at 7:38.

Rating: D. This was SUCH a great way to make me want to see Reigns vs. Bryan. I mean, I don’t know about you, but seeing Kane and Big Show destroy everyone in their path is clearly the most interesting thing in the world. Boring match here and just a glorified squash because the Authority must look strong no matter what. To sum up this match, Bryan and Reigns can’t combine to beat up Big Show/Kane/Rollins, but can beat up two Stooges. I’m so glad I sat through two matches tonight to establish that fact.

Bryan is upset at Reigns for trying to leave. He shoves Roman away and eats a spear to end the show with Reigns getting a heel reaction.

Overall Rating: D+. This show got a lot better after the first half hour, but my goodness a lot of the booking on here drove me insane. It’s clear that this company either doesn’t think these shows through before airing them or just doesn’t care that people actually see them. I have no reason to care about a lot of the people I’m supposed to care about in so many of these stories for one simple reason: people don’t cheer for losers. Why is that so hard to comprehend?

Another thing that should be easily comprehended: there is no need for a PPV between the Rumble and Wrestlemania. Just let us have a long build instead of this mess. You could easily do Reigns vs. Bryan as a major Raw match and then save the rest of the stuff either for Wrestlemania or just not do it because the stories aren’t all that great. I get the Network business idea behind it, but that doesn’t do much for the on screen product.

Results

Daniel Bryan/Roman Reigns b. Kane/Big Show via DQ when Show threw Bryan into the timekeeper’s area

Ryback b. Seth Rollins via DQ when Joey Mercury and Jamie Noble interfered

Paige b. Brie Bella – Rampaige

Bray Wyatt b. Dolph Ziggler – Sister Abigail

New Day b. Goldust/Stardust – Rollup to Goldust

Tyson Kidd/Cesaro b. Usos – Kidd pinned Jey after Cesaro shoved him off the top rope

Sin Cara b. Damien Mizdow – Small package

Dean Ambrose b. Curtis Axel – Dirty Deeds

Daniel Bryan/Roman Reigns b. Joey Mercury/Jamie Noble/Seth Rollins/Big Show/Kane – Spear to Mercury

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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The big idea coming into this week was HHH promising to shake up the WWE and end the controversy that ended the Royal Rumble. That led to the big question: what was the controversy? Reigns won the Rumble by eliminating Rusev and is going to Wrestlemania, but as usual the fans wanted Daniel Bryan. That’s the best theory we have coming into this show so let’s get to it.

The big announcement opened the show and I’ll give a very quick recap: Rock interfered in the Rumble before Rusev was gone so Seth Rollins and Daniel Bryan will fight in the main event for the right to face Reigns at Fast Lane for the Wrestlemania title shot. Rusev was never mentioned once in the promo. This led to Big Show vs. Roman Reigns with Big Show pinning Reigns for his first pinfall loss in a singles match in less than three minutes (with an assist from Rollins and the briefcase).

We’re now going to jump to something a bit different. A few hours after the show ended, I was talking to my fiance, who has been watching wrestling for over twenty years. I looked at her and explained the first thirty minutes of this show. Her face went from its usual smile to confusion, awe and bordering on shock. She didn’t know how to respond to anything I explained to her and eventually just said “what”. Not a question, but a statement. What.

That’s somewhere around where I am too. Read over what happened and explain to me how the decision makes sense. For those of you that have ever taken a logic class, the premises make sense but the conclusion doesn’t fit. Yes, there was some controversy to end the Rumble. Yes, Rusev might have a claim to an unfair loss. Yes, Daniel Bryan deserves a rematch for the World Title as he never lost the belt. Solution: Bryan vs. Rollins with Rusev not being a factor. THAT DOESN’T ADD UP!

Just…..it doesn’t make sense. If they haven’t set up Rusev vs. Cena already, you could set up Bryan vs. Rusev instead of Bryan vs. Rollins tonight and have Cena cost Rusev the match (by countout of course), giving you Bryan vs. Reigns and Cena vs. Rusev with logical stories instead of this mess. But instead, they rushed into the matches without enough thinking, meaning the whole thing is a mess that doesn’t make a ton of sense and leaves fans talking about the buildup instead of the end goal. Short version: slow down and think instead of just barreling into the matches without using some logic.

That brings us to Reigns vs. Big Show, which gives me a similar reaction. The more I think about it, the more I don’t hate the idea. Giving Reigns a loss is a good way to build some adversity for him and keep him from being just another Superman. As I’ve said before, Roman Reigns needs to be Roman Reigns, not a Samoan John Cena. Having him lose early is actually going to be a relief to him later on and also takes away some of the certainty of him winning at Wrestlemania.

But……..WHY WAS THE LOSS TO THE BIG SHOW??? Of all the people on the roster, they felt that he needed to be the first man to defeat Roman Reigns? There was no one, like say Seth Rollins, that would have gotten more out of such a win? I can’t believe WWE thinks this is a hot feud and it almost has to be just sticking it to the fans at this point. On top of that though, there is almost no logical reason for them to have fought again. Reigns pinned him clean on Smackdown, so why are they fighting again? Bad match, questionable at best booking, and a way to tick the fans off. As was said earlier, what.

Oh yeah other stuff happened on this show.

Curtis Axel has a new catchphrase: Don’t change the channel. As much as I like Axel and think his potential has been wasted, that line made me chuckle, which says a lot after the mess I’ve seen so far tonight. Anyway, he thinks he got ripped off at Wrestlemania and ate Dirty Deeds from Ambrose for his opinion. Dean wants the Intercontinental Title, which is as good as anything else he could get around this time.

Stardust and Goldust are having issues and lost to Ascension. People have been asking for this feud for like ever so why not now. Oh and Stardust doesn’t like being called Cody.

Cena came out to recap his feuds with Rusev and the Authority but Stephanie came out to make matches for the three guys that were fired for Survivor Series. I’ve said this far too many times now, but can we PLEASE move on past Survivor Series? That show was two and a half months ago and it’s still a major driver of stories. Can’t they come up with something fresh by this point? I’m over the idea of seeing these three guys being tortured because of one match that doesn’t mean anything, but WWE seems to think it’s the most interesting idea they’ve ever seen.

Ryback beat Luke Harper because Harper is a former Intercontinental Champion and therefore doesn’t get to have much success.

Cesaro beat Jimmy Uso because of something about a double date and because Cesaro and Kidd winning one match makes them the next challengers for the titles. With all that talent they have, there’s no room to bring people up? They can’t throw Itami and Balor together on the main roster like they’ve thrown them together in NXT? Get them onto the main roster and then let them go their separate ways after giving us a decent title program? No, instead it’s the same “well we won a match!” build that people have been complaining about for years now but WWE doesn’t seem to be able to correct.

Miz fired Mizdow and made him a personal assistant. It’s about time on this one as the stunt double thing stopped making sense about ten seconds after it started. Miz has basically been fighting a bunch of handicap matches while Mizdow hasn’t been allowed to contribute anything. It’s like hiring a chef but not letting them cook anything because you think you’re better in the kitchen. The whole thing never made sense and Mizdow is over for all the wrong reasons, which to be fair is better than not being over at all.

Wyatt beat Ziggler in a decent match, which seems to be the start of a rumored Ziggler heel turn. I’ve heard of worse ideas as he’s been abused by the Authority for months, so why not have him give up? I mean, we can’t have him get revenge on the Authority and make them look bad, because WWE is little more than an Authority vanity project when they’re involved.

While talking to the Authority, Rollins name dropped Randy Orton. That’s going to be an interesting return as it could open up a lot of doors in the main event scene.

Paige beat Alicia Fox and was attacked by the Bellas to further set up her title shot. The Bellas have just drained whatever energy this division had going for it. Yeah they’re better than they used to be and I’ll take this a million times over “and I’ve never told anyone about this”, but my goodness the Bellas just aren’t interesting.

Mizdow cost Miz his match against Sin Cara, which I don’t think surprised anyone.

Rusev beat up Rowan before their match and Accoladed him. The Russian flag messed up but the announcers actually covered it by saying Cena might have sabotaged it. It’s nice to see them tie a mistake into a bit of a storyline advancement.

Bryan came in to talk to Reigns and was basically told to get out before he was thrown out. This was the kind of emotion and aggression we haven’t seen from Reigns in a long time and it was a good sign for him.

Bryan beat Rollins with an unintentional assist from Reigns. It was probably the only way they could have gone and the match was the best thing that happened all night. There isn’t much else to say here as it was Bryan vs. Rollins for seventeen minutes. What more do you need to hear?

Overall this Raw felt like getting punched in the jaw to knock out a sore tooth. Yeah your problem is solved, but now you’re annoyed and sore instead of just in pain. I’m really not sure how this was the best option they could come to, but at least we’re getting Reigns in a major singles match before Wrestlemania. A win over Bryan could take away some of the heat on him, especially if it’s a clean win in a good match.

The first half hour of this show really drained me, but it’s not quite as bad looking back at it a week later. Still though, this is a really weird way to get where they needed to go and could have been handled a lot better if they had just stopped and thought for a minute. Again, why not just have Rusev vs. Bryan with Cena costing Rusev the match and set up the Rollins stuff later? It makes sense and keeps Rusev involved, which was the whole point of the controversy in the first place.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 2, 2015
Location: Pepsi Center, Denver, Colorado
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield

Tonight is a major night as HHH has promised to shake the company to its core and give us an end to the controversy at the Royal Rumble. What that controversy is isn’t really clear but hopefully he’ll give us an explanation tonight. Other than that we’re getting closer to Fast Lane and therefore closer to Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of HHH on Smackdown, promising tonight’s major announcement.

Opening sequence.

Here are Stephanie and HHH for the announcement as a lot of the midcard watches in the back. First up, they talk about the Super Bowl and Stephanie emphasizes that the Patriots won because it was best for business. I thought they won because they scored more points. HHH hopes they can survive the new “Cancel the NFL Movement” that struck after the end of the game last night.

HHH shows us the controversy to end the Rumble, which is Rock coming in to attack Big Show and Kane before Rusev was officially eliminated. After comparing the ending to the end of the Super Bowl (I assume when the fight started before the last kneel down), HHH says Rock coming in wasn’t ok. Rock is a huge Hollywood star but that doesn’t mean he can come back in just because he’s a name. Sting recently did the same thing, and it stops at Fast Lane.

That’s why HHH has called Sting out to come to the ring at Fast Lane to solve their problems. You can see that on the WWE Network for just $9.99, or free for new subscribers in February. That brings them back to the original problem: what would have happened if Rock hadn’t come out? Maybe Roman Reigns wouldn’t have won the Rumble, meaning his victory is tainted. They haven’t actually said Rusev’s name in this whole thing. Reigns comes out and says no one is taking away his win. Stephanie says she knows what it’s like to have a family legacy to live up to and says it shouldn’t stop him from going to Wrestlemania.

Cue Daniel Bryan in a new shirt to really wake the crowd up. He says the real controversy is him being stripped of the title and never getting a rematch. If the title match is open at Wrestlemania, he wants to officially throw his name in the hat. HHH sees the logic in that and could see Bryan getting the shot at Wrestlemania. This brings out a smiling Rollins and the Stooges as we take a break due to what seemed like microphone issues.

Back with Rollins asking Bryan if he really wants to face Lesnar for the title at Wrestlemania, because Lesnar would eat him alive. If anyone deserves the shot at Lesnar one on one, it’s Rollins because he broke Brock’s ribs. Reigns cuts him off with the threat of a punch to the face but HHH gets to the point: tonight it’s Bryan vs. Rollins and the winner gets to face Reigns at Fast Lane for the shot at Wrestlemania. Reigns eventually accepts the deal but is told to stay in the ring.

Roman Reigns vs. Big Show

This is joined in progress after a break because WWE has no idea what fans want to see. Reigns tries to fight out of a bearhug but gets headbutted out to the floor. Back in and Roman hits a middle rope clothesline to put Show down. He sends Show into the post but the Stooges break up a Superman Punch attempt, allowing Show to hit a bad spear for two. Reigns fights out of a chokeslam attempt and hits the Superman Punch, only to have Reigns hit Rollins in the back with the briefcase, allowing Big Show to chokeslam Reigns for his first pinfall loss in a singles match in WWE at 2:40 shown.

HHH and Stephanie are in the back and laugh about manipulating everyone into getting what they wanted. Next up: manipulate Austin on the podcast. So it’s going to be kayfabe. Freaking joy.

Here’s Curtis Axel for a chat. Axel: “Don’t turn the channel because I’ve got something to say!” JBL: “I was thinking about changing the channel.” He says he should be going to Wrestlemania because he got sucker punched before he could ever get in. Cue Dean Ambrose and it’s time for a fight. He easily throws Axel over the top and says no he’s eliminated.

Ambrose has some demands of his own. He trudged through the ice and snow to WWE Headquarters and saw a wall of former champions. He takes a nice mugshot so maybe he would look great on that wall. Recently he pinned Bad News Barrett so he’s in line for an Intercontinental Title shot because his face would look good on that wall. Get ready for the road to Fast Lane. Axel jumps him again and winds up taking Dirty Deeds.

Video on Ernie Ladd for Black History Month.

Ascension vs. Goldust/Stardust

Viktor runs over Stardust to start but Goldust sneaks in for some cheap shots before dragging his brother to the ropes for a tag. Off to Konnor who gets kicked in the side of the head but a quick Fall of Man ends Goldust at 1:48. Stardust disappeared after the first thirty seconds.

Stardust walks out on Goldust after the match.

After a break Goldust comes up to Stardust in the back and calls him Cody to make Stardust snap. He says never call him that again, hisses, and walks off.

Here’s Cena with something to say. The match with Rusev at Fast Lane is officially a US Title match. You can see the DQ finish from here. First up though is the Austin Podcast tonight where Austin can ask questions no one wants to ask, but HHH might just step around them all again. HHH has taken over NXT and rebranded it into a group of guys who are ready to come in here and take over. His vision is a WWE without John Cena, but HHH has to answer to sponsors and TV companies and that’s not the best idea.

The Authority tried to make him give up but that’s never going to happen. We see Sting coming out to help Cena beat the Authority two weeks back, meaning welcome back Rowan, Ziggler and Ryback. Well back to Raw that is as they’ve been back for about a week and a half already. Cena knows Rusev can be beaten but here’s Stephanie to cut them off. Ziggler cuts her off but she says those three haven’t fought any of their own battles. Tonight it’s Ziggler vs. Wyatt, Rowan vs. Rusev and Ryback vs. Harper.

Ryback vs. Luke Harper

They trade suplexes to start with Ryback hitting a nice delayed version. The middle rope splash gets one on Harper but Luke big boots him out to the floor to take over. Another boot to the face gets two and we hit the chinlock on Ryback. He fights back up and hits a Thesz Press, only to walk into the swinging Bossman Slam for two. The Meat Hook is countered with a third kick to the face for two more and Shell Shock is countered into a sunset flip for two. Back up and Shell Shock is good for the pin on Harper at 6:00.

Rating: C. The match was a decent power showdown but my goodness this is their big idea? Having Harper get pinned here completely clean? I’m so glad he’s now being used to get someone over again because we’re somehow still dealing with fallout from Survivor Series. This show is getting harder and harder to sit through.

Jimmy Uso vs. Cesaro

This is apparently over a double date Natalya set up for her and Kidd with Jimmy and Naomi. Well of course it is. Cesaro jumps him to start but Jimmy comes back with some chops to tak over. Jimmy whips him to the floor and a Jey distraction sets up a flying Uso to put Cesaro down.

Back in and we hit the chinlock on Jimmy, followed by the Cesaro Swing. A double stomp and tiger bomb get two on Jimmy but he comes back with some clotheslines. The superkick is countered and Jimmy is sent outside, but Kidd can’t get in any cheap shots. Back in and Jimmy superkicks him out of the air, setting up the Umaga attack. Kidd offers a distraction though and Cesaro uppercuts Jimmy out of the air for the pin at 6:22.

Rating: D. This show has completely drained me. We’re only halfway through the show and I already don’t care about anything else they’re going to air tonight. This was your standard way of setting up the Tag Team Title match because WWE only knows a few ways to set matches up nowadays and they used up their one interesting idea with Naomi, meaning it’s time for another year of the same rehashed ideas.

Kidd gets in a cheap shot on Jey after the match.

WWE Network plugs.

Mizdow is getting Miz food at catering when a guy comes up to ask for an autograph. Miz shrugs him off but the guy was asking Mizdow. Damien is happy to sign but Miz rips up the picture and erupts on Mizdow for getting too big of a head after all those months of Mizdow dressing up in costumes and losing all the time. Miz fires him but gives Mizdow a new job as personal assistant. Mizdow goes along with it but looks defeated.

Rowan comes in and thanks Cena for making him his own man. Tonight he’ll thank him by hurting Rusev.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Bray Wyatt

Bray runs him over with a forearm to start and gets in a cheap shot as the referee tries to break it up. A Fameasser attempt sends Bray running to the floor and things slow down. Back in and Ziggler grabs the leg but eats a big uppercut for his efforts. The backsplash gets two and we hit the nerve hold. They’re just doing moves to each other at this point, likely due to the fact that there’s no reason for these two to be fighting. Some dropkicks have Bray in trouble but he snaps Ziggler ribs over the middle rope and suplexes him out to the floor.

We come back from a break with Bray putting on a chinlock to keep killing time. Ziggler fights up and sends Bray shoulder first into the post, only to dive into a right hand. The second backsplash misses though and Ziggler hits a running clothesline, followed by a neckbreaker to put Bray down. Bray takes his head off with a clothesline but Ziggler nails the running DDT for two more. Things speed up and Ziggler hits something like a running superkick to the ribs (it certainly wasn’t the jaw) for two. Ziggler hits the Fameasser but Bray pops up and grabs Sister Abigail for the pin at 14:54.

Rating: B-. This took its time to get going but they picked up after the break. Bray winning is the right move at this point, but it really didn’t need to be at Ziggler’s expense. As usual, they have no idea how to get through storylines without having guys they want to get over losing at some point. I’m all for Wyatt getting a stronger push though.

Rollins comes in to see the Authority and they tell him they’re giving him this match because they have faith in him. They bring up Orton for the sake of plot convenience and Seth promises to go to Fast Lane.

Paige vs. Alicia Fox

The Bellas are on commentary so Paige goes over to scream at them. Back in and Fox gets two off a northern lights suplex before putting on a chinlock as the Bellas speak in hashtags. Fox hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker but Paige small packages her for the pin at 2:44.

Brie covers Paige with tanning spray post match.

Miz is on Sirens this week.

Sin Cara vs. Miz

Mizdow stands at ringside instead of imitating Miz, drawing an even louder chant than usual. Miz’s early chinlock doesn’t get him anywhere as Cara hits some spring cross bodies. Cara goes up and Mizdow is worried, but Miz avoids the Swanton. Damien can’t help himself and teases going to the top, only to be yelled back to ringside. Back in and Miz gets two off a boot to the head and puts on a chinlock. Just have Mizdow cost him the match already. Cara fights up but gets put right back down, drawing Mizdow up to the apron. Miz yells at him but gets rolled up for the pin at 5:40.

Rating: D. This was all storyline advancement and it could have been anyone in Sin Cara’s role. The show has already crippled my soul and I have no real interest in a lot of what’s going on here, but that’s almost the new norm around here. Miz and Mizdow splitting is a good thing, even though Miz has been doing a face’s work for months now.

Miz yells at Mizdow but Bray cuts them off. He says he’s been watching someone for a long time now and he’s the new face of fear. Bray can’t wait to see someone again. Find him. It shouldn’t be hard to do as it’s almost Wrestlemania season.

Erick Rowan vs. Rusev

Non-title. Rusev jumps Rowan before he gets in the ring and quickly posts him. He rips at Rowan’s face and bends him around the ropes and slapping on the Accolade. No match.

Lana invites us to a movie premiere since it’s Oscar season. This movie is reality instead of the usual happy fairytale ending that will show what happens to anyone who opposes Rusev. We get a Rusev highlight package of people being destroyed by the Russian before posing ensues. The Russian flag doesn’t come down properly and the Russians are livid. Thankfully the announcers say Cena had something to do with this, which is a nice save in case it’s not true.

Daniel Bryan comes into Reigns’ locker room and says he saw what Rollins did out there. He knows Roman wants revenge, but it’s not coming at Fast Lane. Reigns perceives this as a threat and tells Bryan to get out. Reigns felt a lot more heelish here.

Seth Rollins vs. Daniel Bryan

Winner gets Reigns at Fast Lane for the Wrestlemania title shot. Rollins runs him over with a shoulder to start but Daniel starts going after the arm. An armbar attempt sends Rollins bailing to the ropes before he throws Bryan outside. The Stooges get in some cheap shots and Seth dives on Bryan as we take a break. Back with Rollins in control and Big Show looking on from ringside.

Bryan fights back with right hands but gets caught in a quick downward spiral into the buckle. Daniel backflips over him out of the corner and hits the running clothesline before firing off the kicks in the corner. A top rope hurricanrana is countered into a sunset flip for two for Rollins and both guys fight back to their feet. The Stooges try to interfere but Bryan throws Rollins out onto them and hits a big Flying Goat to take them all out.

Back in and Seth crotches him on the top to break up the flying headbutt but Bryan hooks a belly to back superplex for two. The running knee is countered into the Buckle Bomb and the low superkick gets two more. Rollins takes his time going after Bryan though and gets caught in the YES Lock but gets his feet on the bottom rope. Cue Reigns to spear Big Show. Mercury gets speared as well but Noble comes in with the briefcase, allowing Reigns to Superman Punch Rollins. The running knee sends Bryan to Fast Lane at 17:11.

Rating: B. Well that helped a lot. It doesn’t save this show or really come close to it, but the booking made sense and Bryan gets a big win. Now I give him almost no hope of winning the match against Reigns or getting into the main event of Wrestlemania, but it’s nice to see something like this happen to give the fans something to cheer for.

HHH says he’ll address this on the Podcast.

Back in the arena, Bryan thanks the fans for putting him here and promises to win the match at Fast Lane for them.

Overall Rating: D+. This show got a lot better near the end but that first hour was as bad of a stretch as I can remember in years. Reigns losing might seem like some big plan, but my goodness they’re overthinking these things. There was no real need to address this made up controversy, especially when Rusev wasn’t even a factor in the plans. Bryan is being shoehorned in to appease some fans and I’d give him about as much of a chance at main eventing Wrestlemania as I have.

The rest of the show was WAY too Authority heavy as this felt like another show from back in the pre-Survivor Series days. For some reason the Authority is still going after those three guys when the story has been dead (or at least should have been dead) for months now. I’m not sure what we’re getting at Wrestlemania and they’re making it a pretty boring way of finding out.

Results

Big Show b. Roman Reigns – Chokeslam

Ascension b. Goldust/Stardust – Fall of Man to Goldust

Ryback b. Luke Harper – Shell Shock

Cesaro b. Jimmy Uso – European uppercut
Bray Wyatt b. Dolph Ziggler – Sister Abigail

Paige b. Alicia Fox – Small package

Sin Cara b. Miz – Rollup

Daniel Bryan b. Seth Rollins – Running knee

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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Raw spoilers incoming.The controversy wound up being Rock interfering in the Rumble, meaning Rusev got screwed.  The solution?  Bryan vs. Rollins tonight with the winner going to face Reigns at Fast Lane for the Mania title shot.  Rusev wasn’t mentioned in the promo.

We’re not done though.  REigns was in the ring for the discussion and then had to fight Big Show.  Big Show PINNED REIGNS, for his first pinfall loss in a singles match in less than three minutes.  I know I said it wasn’t fair at the Rumble, but commence saying this company is making this nonsense up as they go.

Smackdown
Date: January 29, 2015
Location: XL Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

This is a rare live show due to the massive snow storm in the northeast that wiped out Tuesday’s tapings. That might actually be the best thing they could have had happen to them after the negative reaction to the Royal Rumble. Tonight’s main event is yet another Bryan vs. Kane showdown, this time in a casket match. Let’s get to it.

Here’s HHH to welcome us to Raw before realizing he’s a bit shaken up. The one thing WWE doesn’t like is being told what to do, which is why they did it. Just like they were told they would never have a million Network subscribers, which is exactly what they announced this week. He actually thanks the fans for subscribing in a rare genuine act. Then he was told they couldn’t have a show in Hartford, so here they are for the live show.

WWE isn’t the only one with a controversy right now because the NFL and Roger Goodell have a problem with their balls. Some like them hard and some like them soft, but WWE has never had a problem with balls. However, that’s not something they have an issue with in WWE. HHH is the same way, because he has a problem with the man called Sting, and he’ll be dealing with that face to face at Fast Lane.

That brings him back to the Royal Rumble which had its fair share of controversy. First of all there was an exceptional triple threat where Rollins proved that he is the future, Cena proved that he is the past and Brock Lesnar proved that he is the beast and World Heavyweight Champion.

However, that wasn’t the major controversy. The controversy was due to the Royal Rumble itself, which everyone has been talking about. We see some clips with Cole talking about how the fans are upset that guys like Ziggler, Bryan and Wyatt have been eliminated, leaving Big Show and Kane in the end. Reigns eliminated Rusev to win and cemented his spot at Wrestlemania.

HHH promises to make an announcement on Raw that is going to end the controversy and shake the WWE to its core. That sounds like trying to fix the main event already, which might not be the worst idea in the world. This brings out Reigns, who says there was no controversy because he won the Rumble. HHH agrees that he won the match, so now Reigns can win this one.

Big Show vs. Roman Reigns

Now let this be the FINAL match. They shove each other around to start with Big Show shoving him around to start. This is where Reigns is getting hurt more than anywhere else: he should be DESTROYING Big Show to set up a major showdown with giant killer vs. ultimate giant Lesnar at Wrestlemania. Instead it’s Big Show looking dominant and Reigns probably making a comeback to win in a surprise. Show throws him across the ring as we’re waiting on Reigns’ first offense. He slips out of a slam and sends Big Show into the buckle for a breather, followed by a clothesline out to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Show working on the knee and putting on something like an ankle lock. Reigns climbs up the ropes to escape and counters into an ankle scissors of all things to send Show over the top. There’s the apron kick but of course Show pops back up. Some clotheslines have little effect but a third one finally puts Show down.

A Samoan drop plants Show again but he rolls outside. Another running clothesline off the apron puts Show down but the knee is banged up. Back in and the Superman Punch is countered into the chokeslam for two. Show goes up but gets Superman Punched twice. He still won’t go down so Reigns slams him down, setting up the spear for the pin at 12:21.

Rating: D. AND THEY’RE DONE. Like NEVER AGAIN let these two fight. It’s not even that Reigns is looking bad out there but Big Show just looks like nothing. And what does Reigns get out of this win? Nothing of course, because NO ONE CARES ABOUT BIG SHOW. Dull match here and it’s almost infuriating after all the months of these two fighting.

Vince announces February as a free month for new subscribers on the WWE Network.

Here are Rollins and the Stooges with something to say. Rollins says he told us he would prove himself on Sunday and that’s exactly what he did. He was a single count away from winning the WWE World Heavyweight Title and he stuck a dagger into Lesnar’s heart when he broke his rib. He’s feeling so good that he’s going to issue an open challenge to anyone in this building that wants to face him.

Cue Ryback to go after Rollins but the Stooges get the better of him. This brings out Rowan to help but the Stooges and Rollins take him down as well. Ziggler completes the trio but gets sent into the announcers’ table. Rollins knees Rowan in the back and the Authority bails before anything else happens. I smell a six man.

Kane is caressing a coffin and promises to lock Bryan inside tonight where the only thing he’ll be able to hear is the beating of his heart. It’s ashes to ashes and dust to dust, so may God have mercy on Bryan’s soul tonight, because Kane will have none.

Jey Uso vs. Tyson Kidd

They start fast with Jey going to the corner but getting kicked in the knee. Tyson immediately goes after the bad wheel and slaps on a leg lock like a smart heel (or wrestler in general) should. Jey kicks Kidd out to the floor and nails him in the head, setting up a charge (so much for selling the leg). Kidd kicks him in the head though and springboards back in, only to get caught in a Samoan drop. Jimmy and Cesaro go at it on the floor, allowing Kidd to hit the fisherman’s neckbreaker for the pin at 2:30.

Here are Rusev and Lana to talk about this past Sunday. Rusev says he should have been the winner and Lana is so upset that she can’t speak English. He’s the US Champion and wants to challenge a man from the past: John Cena. Cena has no hunger or desire and he isn’t a superstar anymore. This brings out Cena who looks shocked at what Rusev just said. Cena threatens to shut Rusev’s mouth for him.

It sounds like Rusev has bought into his own hype because he thinks Cena is no challenge for him. He’s John Cena, a fifteen time World Champion, a two time Royal Rumble winner and the face who runs this place. He had that US Title years ago and challenges Rusev to do the Hartford Hoedown. Rusev is ready to go but Lana calls him off. The Russians leave but Cena isn’t done. He’s fighting Rusev at Fast Lane and ending the undefeated streak because the champ is here. This really didn’t accomplish much but Cena sounded good.

Paige vs. Nikki Bella for the Divas Title is official for Fast Lane. Paige is in the back when the Bellas come up to make fun of her for being pale. She elbows Brie in the face but takes a big forearm from Nikki.

Goldust/Stardust vs. Ascension

The brothers aren’t sure who is going to start until it’s Stardust vs. Viktor. A hiptoss puts Viktor down and Stardust WOOs. Stardust is shoved into a forearm to Konnor but Viktor nails him in the back to take over. Konnor comes in an\d stomps away and hammers away before it’s quickly back to Viktor for a chinlock.

Ascension keeps hammering on Stardust in the corner as the Dusts are suddenly the faces in this match. Stardust finally gets over for a hot tag and Goldust comes in with a knee to Viktor’s head as everything breaks down. Stardust tags himself back in and Goldust isn’t pleased. Konnor shoves Stardust off the top and a quick Fall of Man is good for the pin at 4:33.

Rating: D+. This was more angle advancement than anything else but it also gave Ascension another win. It looks like they’re splitting up the Dust Brothers and I can’t say I blame them at this point. There’s nothing left for them to do and they’re starting to get stale as a team, so give the fans a feud that they’ve been wanting for a good while.

Kane is STILL looking at the casket and slams it shut.

A magician is entertaining some wrestlers in the back when Miz and Mizdow come up to shake his hand. Miz gets annoyed at Mizdow shaking his hand but the magician demonstrates a magic trick with a fake egg, only to mystify Miz by turning it into a reel egg. Miz doesn’t believe it’s real and gets it cracked on his head. R-Truth: The yoke’s on you. Mizdow makes sure he isn’t caught laughing. I’m a big fan of magic so this was more entertaining than it should have been.

Bray Wyatt asks us what makes us happy. Maybe it’s money or a fond memory. He finds enjoyment in things that mommy and daddy hid from us as children. Bray is legion among men so he asks what makes us smile. When he’s done, it will be hard for us to ever smile again. Run.

Kane vs. Daniel Bryan

Casket match and they have a lot of time for this one. Cole talks about Bryan looking at the casket because he’s never been in a casket match before. I’m sure this has nothing to do with the potential of being locked inside a casket. Kane quickly goes for the casket but Bryan comes back with kicks to the leg while wearing what appear to be furry boots. Kane can’t gorilla press him into the casket and runs away from an attempted baseball slide as we take a break.

Back with Kane putting Bryan’s face in the ring skirt and hammering away at the covered head. A big boot almost knocks Bryan into the casket but he kicks Kane away for the save. Kane plants him with another side slam but has to fight out of a headscissors to put him into the casket. Bryan nails a high cross body on the floor but gets kicked into the casket, only to crawl out the other side. Kane still can’t get him into the casket and we take another break.

We come back with Bryan holding Kane in a chinlock (you don’t see that everyday) and hitting his running clothesline to put the giant down. Here come the YES kicks to send Kane outside, setting up the FLYING GOAT and more right hands from Daniel. Kane backdrops him over the barricade as the casket has been forgotten for the moment. They head over to the announcers’ table with Bryan getting sent into the chairs, followed by a bunch of chair shots to the back.

They suddenly remember this is a casket match with Kane loading up Bryan for a tombstone off the apron, only to have Daniel slip out and dropkick him a few times. He tries a third dropkick but charges into a chokeslam. Kane loads him into the casket but eats a kick to the face followed by the YES Lock with Kane partially in the casket. Even though it looks terrible, it puts Kane into the casket but Bryan still can’t close it. Kane gets out again and almost turns Bryan inside out with a clothesline. Bryan escapes another chokeslam and the running knee to the side of the head puts him in the casket for the win at 22:10.

Rating: D. WAY too long here with a boring match as they had another Bryan vs. Kane showdown that no one wanted to see. Much like earlier, I really hope this is going to be the end of the feud because there’s no reason for these guys to fight ever again. It took too long for Kane to put put away here, but at least Bryan won. I’m not a fan of these matches though and it really gets annoying watching them having a dull match until they remember it’s a casket match.

We see HHH teasing the announcement for Raw again to close the show.

Overall Rating: D+. The promos carried this show and the show flew by but it really wasn’t all that great. The casket match felt like it went on forever, much like the entire Bryan vs. Kane feud. Thankfully Big Show vs. Reigns should be done, which is why you can already see the gimmick rematch coming at Fast Lane. This was a passable show and felt like Raw cut down to two hours.

If they did this style show every Monday, I can’t imagine how much more the fans would calm down. They didn’t pack this show full of nonsense and there wasn’t as much time being wasted. Keep the show moving and don’t let it get repetitive and the show becomes much easier to sit through. That third hour really does cripple Raw and this show is proof. It wasn’t good, but it was a lot easier to sit through.

Results

Roman Reigns b. Big Show – Spear

Tyson Kidd b. Jey Uso – Fisherman’s neckbreaker

Ascension b. Goldust/Stardust – Fall of Man to Stardust

Daniel Bryan b. Kane – Bryan closed Kane in the casket

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 26, 2015
Location: WWE Studios, Stamford, Connecticut
Hosts: Michael Cole, Booker T., John Bradshaw Layfield

This is going to be a special edition of the show as there won’t be any new matches. Due to a very strong blizzard in the northeast, tonight’s show was canceled and tomorrow’s Smackdown has been postponed to a live show on Thursday night. I’d expect a lot of highlights and taped matches on this show so let’s get to it.

We open with a look at the blizzard to explain why things are a bit different tonight.

Opening sequence.

Cole and Booker T. talk about what’s coming, including last night’s World Title match and the Royal Rumble in their entirety and an interview with Brock Lesnar.

JBL is on the roof of WWE Headquarters as the weatherman for the evening. He gets in a funny line about Sasquatches found frozen in ice dying warmer than he is right now. Points for a decent idea at least.

First up is last night’s World Title match. Since I already did the play by play for this show last night, I’ll be copying over the full version from last night, even though it may be clipped on this broadcast.

WWE World Heavyweight Title: Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

Lesnar is defending and we get big match intros. Rollins immediately bails to the floor and Lesnar hits the first German suplex on Cena. There’s the second German as Rollins comes in, only to get caught on Brock’s shoulders. The Stooges make the save so Brock suplexes them at the same time. Brock launches Seth back into the ring and Germans Cena again. All Lesnar so far.

Both challengers are easily suplexed again and there’s the Kimura to Cena. Brock even climbs onto Cena but Seth makes the save with the springboard knee to the head and Lesnar is in trouble. A double suplex puts Lesnar down and there’s an AA but Rollins throws Cena to the floor and only gets one on the champ. Both challengers are thrown to the floor and you can see everyone laying as Brock walks around the ring. Seth knocks Brock into the steps for a breather, leaving Cena to beat Rollins up inside.

The fans absolutely hate Cena and are thrilled to have Brock break up the Shuffle with rolling Germans. Rollins breaks it up for some reason though and knees Lesnar out to the floor. Now it’s Cena getting all fired up and cleaning house, only to have Rollins knock him outside. Seth tries a springboard onto Lesna but gets caught on Brock’s shoulders for an F5. John has to make a save so Brock feels the need to throw him down with another German suplex.

That’s not enough for Brock though as he loads up the announcers’ table (and destroys a monitor), only to walk into the AA. Brock doesn’t even stay down so Cena hits another, only to have Lesnar pop up again. A third AA gets two as Rollins makes the save, followed by the Curb Stomp for two with Cena making a save. Now the fans are impressed. Lesnar throws them both down again and goes outside, only to have Cena follow him out and spear the champ through the barricade.

Cena slams him hard into the steps and blasts him in the face with the same steps, knocking the champ onto the announcers’ table. Seth kicks Cena down and goes up for a top rope elbow through the table to put everyone down. That was one heck of a crash as the war continues. Back in and Rollins hits the low superkick for two on Cena but John grabs a popup sitout powerbomb for the same. Lesnar is receiving medical attention as Rollins counters a superplex attempt into the running buckle bomb for two.

Everyone is down again but Cena grabs the STF, only to have the Stooges come in for the save. Rollins plays Reigns in a Triple Bomb as a stretcher comes out for Lesnar. Cena kicks out at two so Rollins grabs the briefcase, only to miss the charge and fly out to the floor. The Stooges take a double AA and Rollins gets the single version but kicks out at two. We cut back to Lesnar who says he wants to stay out here. Cole says Lesnar has at least a broken rib. Rollins enziguris Cena down and the Curb Stomp connects for another near fall.

Rollins busts out a Phoenix Splash but Lesnar CHARGES back in for some German suplexes as Beast Mode is on. Seth flips out of a German though and knocks Lesnar silly with the briefcase, only to have Lesnar pop up with an F5 to counter the Curb Stomp onto the briefcase to retain the title at 22:45.

Rating: A. If there’s one thing WWE can do like no one else, it’s organized carnage. These guys DESTROYED each other for twenty two minutes and I would have believed anyone could have won at any time. Lesnar going into that other level is absolutely terrifying and you believe he could beat anyone at that point. Great stuff here and well worth going out of your way to see. They’re making Lesnar out to be unstoppable, meaning whoever gets to take the title off of him will be a huge star. You might even say they’ll be Reign(s)ing. And yes that was as stupid as it sounded.

This Thursday, Daniel Bryan vs. Kane in a casket match on Smackdown.

Seth Rollins is live in studio for an exclusive interview. Rollins says he deserved to be in the title match at the Rumble because of his skills, not because he brought back the Authority. He did everything he was supposed to do to win the title, including Curb Stomping Lesnar. It’s put him down before, but it didn’t work last night.

The springboard elbow and Phoenix Splash should have won and Rollins was surprised that they didn’t. Rollins even admits that he underestimated Lesnar last night, but Lesnar underestimated him as well. Lesnar may be the World Champion, but he doesn’t have a Plan B. Brock will be here next, and Rollins says he can come take this chair from him. It’s not often that you hear someone admit their best wasn’t good enough and this came off more like a face interview than anything else. I don’t think it’s a turn or anything but we’ll call it shades of gray.

After a break, Lesnar comes up to the interview set and says Rollins has his chair. Rollins gets up and shoves the chair down before walking away. Brock sits down and confirms that he has a broken rib but it was time for him to win last night and that’s what he did. Heyman says they’re not at odds with the Authority because Lesnar is going to be headlining the biggest show of the year. If the Authority has a problem with someone, Brock Lesnar will be there to take them out as long as the Authority pays him what he’s worth.

We look at a clip of Brock breaking the Streak and Lesnar says he won the match due to overcoming and conquering everything in his path, just like he has everything else. After that totally obvious piece of filler, Brock says he’s happy for Reigns and hopes he’s up for the challenge, because the champ is ready. When a steamroller has momentum going, get out of his way. Heyman says Reigns can’t stop Lesnar. “Anything else?” Cole says Reigns will be here later tonight and Lesnar thinks he might stick around.

Lesnar vs. Reigns already sounds better. Not due to anything here as this was nothing special, but because it’s not in the really boring Royal Rumble. I really do think that has more to do with it than anything else. When you get down to just Lesnar vs. Reigns as two monsters clashing, a lot of that hatred is going away and people will calm WAY down over it. Just thinking that it’s Reigns vs. Lesnar at Wrestlemania and forgetting last night makes it feel a lot less annoying and dreadful. That’s a big step forward.

Royal Rumble

90 second intervals and it’s Miz at #1 and R-Truth at #2. The fans immediately want Mizdow but get a headlock from R-Truth instead. Feeling out process to start until Truth gets crotched on top. In at #3 is BUBBA RAY DUDLEY, complete with taped up glasses. It’s Miz getting the big beating and the wind-up elbow has Miz reeling. Truth (appropriately) helps with What’s Up and is even told to get the tables. You know the Philadelphia crowd is up for that. Miz gets back up and eats 3D, allowing Bubba to easily eliminate him.

Luke Harper is in at #4 as Bubba throws out Truth. They immediately start hammering on each other and Harper fights out of the Bubba Bomb before kicking Bubba in the jaw. A big lariat puts Harper down though and the ECW chants revive Dudley. Bray Wyatt is in at #5, complete with lantern. Bubba stares him down but Harper gives us a Wyatt Family reunion as the fans want D-Von. Harper throws Bubba out and it’s time for the big staredown.

They stand in place until Curtis Axel is in at #6 but Erick Rowan (who didn’t qualify for the Rumble) jumps him from behind though and whips him into the barricade, apparently stealing Axel’s spot. Harper looks at Rowan and wants a team up, much to Bray’s excitement. Bray and Harper join forces though and Rowan gets double teamed, only to have Bray dump both of them out to clear the ring.

The Boogeyman returns at #7 and Cole informs us that the guy coming out to I’M THE BOOGEYMAN is in fact named the Boogeyman. Bray smiles at him and stops a charge with a big clothesline, setting up the easy elimination. Sin Cara is in at #8 and Cole sounds bored out of his mind. Cara gets in a kick from the apron but Bray just decks him with a right hand. Sister Abigail connects and Bray is all alone again a few seconds later.

Bray grabs the mic and issues an open invitation because he has the whole world in his hands. Zack Ryder returns at #9, hits the Broski Boot, and is quickly Bray’s fifth elimination. Daniel Bryan is in at #10 to really pick things up. He immediately starts the kicks and has Bray in trouble in the corner. Even more kicks put him down as Fandango is in at #11. Bryan busts out even more kicks and an old school airplane spin but doesn’t throw Fandango out.

Tyson Kidd (complete with his addictive theme song) is in at #12 to slug it out with Bryan before a double cross body puts both guys down. Stardust is in at #13 as we’re firmly in the midcard portion. Cole says this is Stardust’s first Rumble to split a few hairs. We currently have Wyatt, Bryan, Stardust, Fandango and Kidd in the ring. Stardust and Fandango trade skinning the cat saves before Bryan belly to back suplexes Kidd out.

Bray gets knocked through the middle rope and Bryan follows with the Flying Goat, meaning both guys are still in as Diamond Dallas Page is in at #14. Stardust jumps him upon entry but eats a Diamond Cutter. Fandango takes the middle rope version, followed by Wyatt missing a charge and taking one of his own. Rusev is in at #15 and it’s time to clear out some space. He blocks a Diamond Cutter and dumps Page and Fandango, setting up a showdown between Rusev and Wyatt.

Daniel breaks it up with a top rope dropkick and unleashes more kicks, only to have Bray pop up and dump him out far earlier than I was expecting. Goldust is in at #16 as the crowd is just dead. Stardust tries to throw out Goldust (with Cole mentioning that Goldust was eliminated by his brother last year, despite saying Stardust was in his first Rumble. Like I said, splitting hairs) but Goldust saves himself. The fans start chanting for Bryan and them switch to booing.

Kofi Kingston is in at #17, giving us Kingston, Goldust, Stardust, Rusev and Wyatt. Bray catapults him over the top but Kofi skins the cat and comes back in with a springboard shot to the head. Everyone gets into one corner until Adam Rose is in at #18. You can hear every word of the songs now as the crowd just does not care at the moment. Kofi is thrown out but the Rosebuds catch him and walk him back to the apron. Rusev dumps Rose and Kofi a few seconds later and Roman Reigns is in at #19 to a lot less booing than I was expecting.

Roman starts cleaning house and dumps both Dust Brothers, only to get double teamed by Rusev and Wyatt. Big E. is in at #20 to clean house and give us a very powerful foursome of Big E., Rusev, Wyatt and Reigns. Mizdow is in at #21 but Miz runs out to say it’s his spot. Damien finally stands up to Miz and goes in to a good reaction, only to be dumped by Rusev. Jack Swagger is in at #22 and everyone keeps brawling until Ryback is in at #23.

Ryback busts out everyone with spinebusters as JBL incorrectly says Lex Luger is the only man to win the Rumble but never win the WWE Title (Duggan). The fans chant for CM Punk but get Kane at #24, giving us Wyatt, Rusev, Reigns, Big E., Swagger, Ryback and Kane. Dean Ambrose wakes the crowd up again at #25 and goes right for Wyatt. We get more brawling around the ropes until Titus O’Neil is in at #26 and is dumped in about thirty seconds (counting intro) by Reigns and Rusev.

Ambrose dropkicks Wyatt up against the ropes and Bad News Barrett gets lucky #27. The ring is getting full but no one is in any real danger of being eliminated. Cesaro is in at #28 and joins the fray. Rusev sends Big E. to the apron and then kicks him out to clear the ring a bit. Big Show is in at #29 and everyone stops to stare him down. They all gang up on him but Show shoves everyone down as Kane chokeslams Ambrose. Show does the same to Reigns before the monsters dump Ryback with ease.

Swagger is dumped by the power team as well, tying Kane for the all time record at 39 eliminations. Dolph Ziggler is in at #30, giving us a final group of Wyatt, Rusev, Reigns, Kane, Ambrose, Barrett, Cesaro, Big Show and Ziggler. Dolph has to fight out of the chokeslam from Big Show and dumps Barrett. Cesaro swings Dolph around and gets him to the apron, only to be pulled out for the elimination. Ziggler goes up top and dives right into the KO Punch, allowing Kane and Show to easily dump him, giving Kane the all time eliminations record.

Big Show KO’s Wyatt and dumps him as well, leaving us with Ambrose, Reigns, Big Show and Kane as the final four. Reigns is bleeding from the side of the mouth as the brawl is on. The Shield fights out of a double chokeslam but Ambrose’s rebound clothesline has almost no effect on Show. Reigns knocks Show down and the fans just are not happy. Big Show and Kane double team Roman though before a chokeslam is enough to get rid of Ambrose.

So it’s Kane and Big Show vs. Reigns and the fans are LIVID. Reigns gets sent to the apron but Show tries to dump Kane, triggering a fight that has been going on for over fifteen years now. Reigns sneaks up from behind them and eliminates both guys to go to Wrestlemania at 57:23.

Rating: D+. I’m surprised by this but I really shouldn’t be. They actually went with Reigns vs. the giants to end the Royal Rumble? This match felt like a big tease from the company as they were setting up Wyatt, Cesaro, Rusev, Ambrose and Ziggler for this big showdown but then snatched it away to go with Kane and Big Show as the big monsters. That’s really what they think is the smart idea? And you know we’re getting Reigns vs. Big Show at Fast Lane, probably without Big Show doing a job for him because he doesn’t get pinned you see.

As for the rest of the match…..yeah I liked it, but man alive it was obvious where they were going with about twenty minutes to go. Bryan going out that early is a waste, though I’m fine with him not winning it. He had his big moment last year and it would be foolish to try and recreate it. Bryan can get the title later on in his other big moment and that’s all he needs to do.

The returns were fine but there was no big surprise at the end (that’s fine), and Reigns was just so obvious as a winner. Also, the commentary was getting REALLY annoying with all their stats, some of which just didn’t make sense. I didn’t hate this match, but Reigns is getting wedged into a spot he’s just not ready for whatsoever. Wrestlemania better have an amazing undercard, because Reigns vs. Lesnar is not going to cut it on top.

Post match Kane and Big Show destroy Reigns until The Rock makes a surprise run in for the save. House is cleaned but Rusev is back in! He was never officially elimianted…..so Reigns throws him out to officially win about three minutes after he won in the first place. Again, more teasing.

The Authority comes out as Rock poses with Reigns before letting Reigns point at the sign to end the show.

Reigns is in the studio for a live interview. After a quick question about how amazing last night was, Byron Saxton asks him what he thinks when people say he isn’t ready. Reigns tells a story of his father Sika throwing him in the pool at the YMCA when he wasn’t ready. When he went under, he scratched and clawed his way up and that’s how he learned how to swim, even though he wasn’t ready. As for the crowd last night, yeah he was hoping for a warmer reception but those people paid their money and can say what they want.

Reigns doesn’t know if he’s been handpicked as the next guy, but if he has, it’s an opportunity. He has to lace up his boots and get in that ring by himself to grasp the opportunity. After the match last night, the Rock came down to help him because Rock is family. Reigns hasn’t mentioned that Rock is his family too often but now he goes into the Samoan family tree. The WWE put food on his table when he was a kid and now he wants to thank them by meeting Brock Lesnar face to face both at Wrestlemania, but here tonight.

This was a good performance from Reigns as he sounded FAR more natural here and you could tell he wasn’t reading from a cheesy script. It’s interesting that they’re addressing all the big questions being asked about him instead of just going with whatever lame story they had. I’m not saying it’s going to save things but it’s more interesting than what it sounded like we were getting.

From last night on the post show, Cena was doing an interview when Rusev charged in and took the microphone from him. They got in each other’s faces and the match is on for Fast Lane. Cole acknowledges that it was going to be at Wrestlemania but they’re moving it up.

We look back at Sting returning to help Cena win the main event last week. HHH will call out Sting at Fast Lane.

We get the announcement for the latest inductee into the Hall of Fame: Arnold Schwarzenegger. Some wrestlers do some Arnold impressions. Ryback is actually appropriate as he played a Terminator character in OVW, complete with the Terminator theme as his music.

Dean Ambrose is walking in the snow and comes inside. After a break, Dean is messing with the heater and says it isn’t even that cold here. This morning, he walked through a blizzard and hitchhiked all the way here, got in a fight on a gas station, stole some hiking boots and got here. It’s not unlike the Road to Wrestlemania because he loves dangerous conditions. No matter who or what is in front of him, he’s going to make it to Wrestlemania. He goes off to find out if anyone has any posters of him around here.

The next sitdown interview is with Daniel Bryan, who recaps the start of the YES Movement and his rise to the top of the company, followed by being put out of action by Kane. He feels like he let down the fans because they had supported him to get where he was. It feels like he has to win the title again, just for the people. As for being eliminated early last night, he went into the match thinking that it was the perfect opportunity to go to face the ultimate dragon and get his title back.

But he failed and Reigns rose up and made the most of the situation. Now Bryan never had WWE feed him as a kid but he’s sure Reigns can have a great match at Wrestlemania and do the company proud. He’s going to end Kane in the casket match on Thursday and move on to become champion. This was definitely the weakest of the interviews so far, mainly because Bryan vs. Kane again interests absolutely no one.

Reigns and Lesnar have their big sitdown meeting but Heyman takes over the questions. He’s known Reigns’ family longer than Reigns has known them, all the way back to when he (Heyman) was a kid. He took Yokozuna’s first publicity pictures and managed Rikishi before he was Rikishi, and saw Rikishi’s kids, now known as the Usos, messing around in the ring before a WCW show. Heyman knew Reigns as a boy in Pensacola when his father was wrestling down there.

Paul also knows the Rock, but more importantly, the Rock knows Brock Lesnar. Back in 2002, the Rock ruled the roost around here, but then he met Brock Lesnar. Now Reigns wants to be the next big thing, just like Lesnar was back in 2002. However, that’s not going to happen. The Rock never asked for a rematch with Brock Lesnar because just one match was enough for him. That’s what Rock never told Reigns, because he doesn’t want Reigns to know the truth. Lesnar is the 1 in 21-1, so how is Roman going to handle disappointing his family when he loses at Wrestlemania because he can’t beat Brock?

Reigns stares Heyman down and says he’ll answer that to Brock’s face. He turns to face the champ and says he knows what he signed up for, but Brock doesn’t know what he signed up for. Roman is going to take the title at Wrestlemania, but if he can’t, he’s going to take a piece of Lesnar with him. Lesnar gets right in his face and Reigns stands up. They shake hands and Brock says unlike Heyman, he doesn’t respect Reigns. Roman: “But you will.”

Overall Rating: B. This was exactly the kind of show WWE needed after last night. One of the biggest problems with WWE is they have the most scripted, stuck in a rut feeling to them. Instead, this felt completely different and allowed them to slow down rather than cramming everything into three hours with all the WACKY COMEDY and twenty minute promos all over the place. This show was far more entertaining than I was expecting and gave me new hope for the future.

The Lesnar vs. Reigns stuff was absolutely mind blowing with both guys more than holding their own under Heyman’s masterful direction. Reigns kept this simple and sounded like a gladiator with short lines instead of doing all the scripted nonsense. A simple story about learning to swim made me care about him more than a year and a half of Shield matches. Overall, this was a great show and exactly what WWE needed. It’s also amazing how much better last night’s results feel when you get away from the dull Rumble. That’s a great sign for the future.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Smackdown
Date: January 22, 2015
Location: Frank Erwin Center, Austin, Texas
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Much like last week, this actually feels like a big show. The main event for tonight is again Bryan vs. Kane, now in a No DQ match with Bryan’s Rumble spot on the line. The show had a significantly bigger audience last week compared to the normal audiences on Fridays, so maybe we’re in for more big time shows. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of Raw with Sting helping Cena win the 3-1 handicap match to save Cena’s spot in the Sunday’s title match but more importantly getting Ziggler, Rowan and Ryback’s jobs back.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Daniel Bryan to get things going. He’s excited to get on the Road to Wrestlemania and would love to talk about his No DQ match tonight and how he won’t let anything stop him from winning the Royal Rumble. He could talk about how obsessed he is with getting the WWE World Heavyweight Championship back. Or he could talk about Sting’s first ever appearance on Raw and how it ruined the Authority’s night.

However, there’s something more important than that, and it’s what John Cena accomplished on Raw. There are three people with something to say about it, so here are Ryback, Rowan and Ziggler for their big returns. Well as big as they can be after just getting a few weeks off. It’s really hard to care about them being fired when they’re back in just a few weeks.

The fans chant FEED ME MORE at Ryback before he compares his firing to Bryan’s injury. The Big Guy is back but doesn’t have much more to say other than catchphrases. Rowan says being gone was sort of a blessing because he had a lot of time to sit back and think. Believe it or not, he used to be a different person. He was naive and someone’s puppet, but these last few weeks have let them (as in he and the sheep mask) know who he really is.

That leaves us with Ziggler, who of course gets the biggest reaction of the three. Ziggler set around eating stuffed crust pizza and watched the HHH and Stephanie fitness DVDs. He’s joking of course and brings up all the momentum he had before getting fired (because WWE loves to build people up and then take them off TV). But the Authority tried to take it away because they’re a threat. He would rather stay here and take a beating like never before than going home sitting on his couch and complaining on a podcast (it had been too long since the last Punk cheap shot).

Cue the Authority minus the actual authority with Rollins saying this is a Survivor Series reunion with a garden gnome replacing Bryan. Ziggler wants to beat Rollins up right now but Rollins has more important things to do than deal with someone who sits on a couch eating stuffed crust pizza. Oh and the fitness DVDs are AWESOME! Ziggler says Rollins must enjoy them because he’s never seen anyone run away from Lesnar that fast.

Kane tells Bryan to calm down because he still has to survive tonight to get into the Rumble. Bryan responds by showing a clip of Lesnar destroying Kane and Big Show to close Raw. That’s not cool with Big Show who promises to win the Rumble on Sunday because the four people in the ring are all losers. Kane promises to go to depraved levels to destroy Bryan but turns his attention to Ziggler. Since he’s a new employee, Ziggler has to start back at the bottom of the ladder and work his way back to the Intercontinental Title. However, Kane is willing to give Ziggler a match against Barrett right now.

Royal Rumble Qualifying Match: Bad News Barrett vs. Dolph Ziggler

Non-title and only Ziggler can qualify with a win. Barrett easily takes him down to start but gets caught in a headlock. A nice dropkick gets two for Dolph but a headscissors is countered with a kick to the ribs. They head outside where Barrett sends him into the apron before cranking on the arm back inside. This is the kind of stuff I’d like to see more of: someone grabbing a body part and cranking on it for the middle part of the match.

A top wristlock has Ziggler in trouble but he avoids a charge in the corner. The running DDT gets two for Dolph and we take a break. Back with Barrett going back to the arm but Ziggler rolls through to send Barrett shoulder first into the post. Dolph nails a big superkick for two more and both guys are down. Back up and the champ kicks him in the ribs but the Bull Hammer is blocked, setting up the Zig Zag for the pin at 10:54.

Rating: D+. Barrett losing all the time is officially a running joke. I mean, it has to be. There’s no way they can think this is the logical way to book anything. The match was actually pretty dull with neither guy going out of the ordinary. I’m not sure what the solution is for Barrett, but this stuff is turning him into more and more of a waste every week.

We recap Ascension getting beaten down by the legends on Raw.

Reigns looks at the footage of Big Show going after the legends from Raw and knocking out Flair until Reigns made the save. Roman doesn’t know if Renee Young has heard, but Big Show is a giant. If you haven’t heard, just listen because it’s all he ever talks about. Andre never had to do that because his actions did the talking.

Show also always talks about Reigns wanting his spot, but Reigns wants his own spot. In the Rumble, everyone is all over the place and his fist is cocked, locked and ready to rock. He’s the one vs. all and he’s the one standing at the end. Believe that. This was FAR better than his usual stuff and felt much more natural.

Fandango draws his Rumble number and seems very pleased. As he dances with Rosa, Ambrose sneaks in and steals his number. The referee monitoring the drawing has no issue with this.

Ryback vs. Rusev

Non-title again and only Ryback can qualify. Ryback hits a hard shoulder but Rusev frantically rolls outside before the cover. Back in and Ryback hits a nice suplex, sending Rusev’s legs into the ropes in the process. The champ bails to the floor again but is able to dropkick a charging Ryback to take over. We take a break and come back with Rusev getting two off a DDT.

Rusev wraps the leg around the post, hoping Ryback actually sells it unlike he did in the Big Show match a few weeks back. Ryback takes advantage of Rusev’s trash talking and hits a slingshot belly to back suplex and a powerslam for two. A Backpack Stunner gets two more and Ryback stops to hold his knee (to be fair Rusev didn’t do much to the knee so it’s not as annoying this time).

Ryback’s powerbomb is countered into an Alabama Slam (Siberia Slam?) for two but he just runs Rusev over. For some reason Ryback goes up top, only to be quickly crotched down for two. Rusev tells himself to crush but Ryback fights out of the Accolade and loads up the Meathook, sending Rusev running again. Ryback follows and hammers away before beating the count at 13:47.

Rating: C+. Who would have thought these two would be better than Ziggler and Barrett? There was even a bit of a story told with Rusev running a lot in the beginning and then losing when he tried it once too often. Ryback can do a decent power match and Rusev is finding ways to keep the unpinned streak alive without looking stupid. I’ll call this a pleasant surprise.

Rusev goes after him again but gets dispatched one more time.

Brie Bella vs. Naomi

Paige and Natalya are on commentary. Thankfully the BRIE MODE is gone. The Bellas mock Natalya for loving cats and call Paige a vampire. Paige corrects them by saying she’s a glampire and a black heart. Naomi kicks at Brie’s leg as Paige and Natalya debate if they’re friends or not. Paige calls Tyson Kidd an idiot as Naomi gets her throat snapped across the top rope for two. Brie misses her running knee but hits a jawbreaker on the knee, setting up the Bella Buster for the pin at 2:20. So much for Naomi meaning anything.

Luke Harper says you can send anyone into the Royal Rumble, but don’t send in anyone you want back. Rowan better not blink or the monsters will get him. Are you scared yet?

Goldust and Stardust draw their numbers and hiss at each other.

Erick Rowan vs. Luke Harper

Only Rowan can qualify. They slug it out to start and Rowan runs him over with a shoulder for an early two. Harper busts out a freaking hurricanrana to counter a powerbomb. This guy is not normal. Rowan just throws him into the corner and gets two more off a spin kick. Luke bites the fingers to block I think a full nelson but this time Rowan’s powerbomb connects for two. Erick misses a top rope splash though and a superkick and discus lariat gives Harper the pin at 3:20.

Rating: C. The more I see Harper the more I wonder why he isn’t being pushed to the moon and back. On the other hand, the more I see Rowan, the more I wonder why they even bothered pushing him in the first place. He’s fine in the ring and I like his potential, but he’s just a big jobber at this point and it seems like that’s all he was ever meant to be.

Kane borrows the Stooges for his match with Bryan.

Rumble by the numbers video.

Miz is annoyed at Mizdow for imitating X-Pac without his permission. Mizdow says the fans liked it but Miz says no one cheers for him because they’re all cheering for Miz. Miz also rejects the pumpkin latte for having the wrong amount of foam. He leaves and the Usos come up and tell Mizdow that he can get his hands on Miz in the Rumble. The idea intrigues Mizdow but he still looks conflicted.

Kane vs. Daniel Bryan

No DQ with Bryan’s Rumble spot on the line and the Stooges in Kane’s corner. A cross body gets one on Kane but Bryan has to go after the Stooges, allowing Kane to kick him down to the floor. He stays on the neck with a neckbreaker on the floor before dropping him onto the barricade. It’s kendo stick time with Bryan getting cracked over the back a few times before they head back inside.

Daniel gets the cane to cane Kane before alternating between kicks and cane shots to the back. A big kick to the head is only good for two and Kane knocks him out of the air as we go to a break. Back with Kane holding a chinlock (what else would he be doing?) and cracking Bryan in the back with a chair for two. The chair gets wedged into the corner but Kane low bridges him to the floor. The Flying Goat is countered with an uppercut and Kane takes over on the floor. Bryan gets whipped into the steps and the Stooges load up the announcers’ table. They’re already more useful than Patterson and Brisco.

The tomestone and chokeslam are both countered and Kane gets sent into the post to give Daniel a breather. Back in and a bad looking YES Lock has Kane in trouble but the Stooges come in to break it up. Lawler and Cole are incensed but Saxton correctly point out that they’re not breaking any rules. Bryan fights them off but eats a chokeslam for two. Kane is livid and gets another chair, only to be sent into the one he wedged in the corner, setting up the running knee to send Bryan to the Rumble at 12:18.

Rating: B-. This was as good as you can expect from Bryan vs. Kane, but the feud needs to end here. Kane as the monster hunting Bryan is only going to get you so far and we passed that point back in April. Having Bryan overcome a small set of odds is the right way to use him and getting the big win off his finisher is the right way to go. I can more than live with Kane in roles like this, with him getting pinned by a bigger star who slays a monster. Why can’t we get there with Big Show?

Speaking of Big Show, he drags Bryan back to the ring but Ziggler, Rowan and Ryback come in for the save. The big Rumble brawl is on until Ambrose and Reigns come out to make it serious. Roman cleans house, even though most of the guys were already gone by the time he got in. It gets down to all of the big heroes in the ring (minus Rowan. They’re not even hiding it now) and Kane and Big Show on the apron to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. It’s still not a great show, but the important part of this show is stuff happened. Instead of spending a big segment on Raw bringing back the three fired guys, it was saved for here and we even saw two of them qualify for the Rumble. It’s not exactly Lesnar and Rollins having a showdown, but I’ll take this over the weekly big tag match every day. If WWE can build up momentum for Smackdown, it might get even bigger in the future. Good show this week that felt important.

Results

Dolph Ziggler b. Bad News Barrett – Zig Zag

Ryback b. Rusev via countout

Brie Bella b. Naomi – Bella Buster

Luke Harper b. Erick Rowan – Discus lariat

Daniel Bryan b. Kane – Running knee

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Raw was back in New Orleans for the first time since the night after Wrestlemania last year, meaning the fans are going to be hot all night. The big story is the return of Daniel Bryan and how serious he seems to be about winning the Rumble and main eventing Wrestlemania again. The key thing is this gives us a new option other than Reigns for the top spot, which is far more interesting than just having the long choice. Let’s get to it.

To the shock of no one paying attention, we opened with a long promo between Cena and the Authority, talking about things that happened back at Survivor Series. Basically Cena thinks the Authority sucks (and he has a HASHTAG for it) and he’s going to win the WWE Title to get Ryback, Rowan and Ziggler their jobs back. See, he’s going to win the title and then leave, because that’s going to make the Authority miss him. I’m not sure if this was supposed to be a jab at Lesnar, but it came off as more of a stupid idea than anything else.

HHH and Stephanie came out and offered Cena a deal: the trio can have their jobs back if Cena can beat Rollins in a lumberjack match right now. So to recap, in the span of a month, Cena and Rollins have had a regular match, a tables match, a (really good) cage match and a lumberjack match.

In a logical world, that should be months and months of matches, not a single month. It shows how WWE feels desperate to keep people watching with quick fixes instead of setting this stuff up. As usual, I’ll point you to NXT. You know what you don’t see a lot of there? Gimmick matches. The gimmick matches, when they happen, are to blow off a feud. Neville fought Dallas in a ladder match and you see a few 2/3 falls matches in there. They let the regular stories build up to the gimmicks instead of just throwing them all out there at once, which makes them mean more.

In NXT, you hear the words “ladder match” and gasp because it’s something very rare and therefore special. In WWE you hear the words ladder match and roll your eyes because they have at least three a year between MITB and TLC. The same is true of cage matches, which happen WAY too often on Raw and with almost no build.

That’s another issue with the lumberjack match on Monday: they had all of five minutes’ notice. How are the fans that might want to see it supposed to know? Hope that they read Twitter? Is that really what you’re hoping for? It’s a bad idea and amazingly enough, it doesn’t seem to be anything successful.

As for the match itself, of course Rollins won with interference. It was entertaining enough and a good match, but I’m tired of seeing them fight. You know they’re just waiting on a reason to bring the trio back and I’d be shocked if they weren’t in the Rumble, making this entire storyline a waste of time. You know, like so many other things you see in WWE anymore, which is really getting old.

Due to their comments about the trio being fired on Smackdown, Stephanie punished the Usos by making Naomi wrestle with an arm tied behind her and Ambrose has to see a psychiatrist or he’s out of the Rumble. Simple idea, but the Naomi thing sounds destined to fall flat.

Dean’s evaluation was of course a comedy segment with him freaking out over the doctor’s clock, calling Stephanie a HO in a funny bit and switching roles with the doctor. Other than the Stephanie bit, there really wasn’t much to see in this and I really wish they had done something more with it. It’s a very good sign that Dean is still getting a focus, even though he was completely and totally buried by losing in pay per view main events right? That’s how it works no?

The New Day beat Kidd and Cesaro in an average match. I really like Kidd and Cesaro as a team, even though they see to be little more than jobbers at this point. Why are they jobbers you ask? It’s because that’s the role they were given when the team was put together and screw you if you think they should rise up the card, because that’s the role they’re given and nothing is going to change that. That seems to be the mentality in WWE way too often and unfortunately it rarely changes.

Big Show came out, talked about being an awesome giant and ran away from Reigns and his horrible scripted promos. They’ve been doing this FOREVER now and I really hope they blow this off at the Rumble instead of taking it all the way out to Fast Lane. As for Reigns’ promos, his delivery is fine but Steve Austin on his best day would have trouble getting over this horrible material.

Now the interesting part for Reigns came when he had a really entertaining match against Luke Harper. The key here though was Harper, who looked absolutely awesome. The stuff that he can do at his size is incredible and he looks like one of the best guys on the roster today. Why can’t he and Reigns be having a great feud and beat the tar out of each other for weeks on end? Instead we have Big Show because he was a big deal like, years ago. I really hope Harper gets a push in the future because he’s more than earned it at this point.

Mizdow reveals that he’s been filming Miz in his home, much to Miz’s chagrin. They need to split them eventually and this might work. As usual, I like that it’s something interesting and unique to the characters. It’s actual writing for the characters instead of writing for the story and putting the characters in. Those are two very, very different things. One is good and the other is what makes wrestling hard to sit through.

Alicia Fox beat Naomi in a dull match with Naomi’s arm tied behind her back. See, it’s Total Divas AND the Authority stories combined! HOW CAN YOU POSSIBLY TOP THIS???

Lesnar and Heyman came out and said they’re awesome. This is basically a way to say Lesnar is coming for Rollins too. I really don’t care about Lesnar at this point because he’s been gone for so long and it’s ruined so much of the main event scene.

Miz beat Jey Uso to continue a feud that is long since over. Once the Naomi Goes Hollywood stuff went away, the feud died in a hurry.

Daniel Bryan and Stephanie (because she isn’t on this show enough) came out and did their usual thing. They really are just doing the same story over again….and I’m not sure how to feel about that. If Bryan wins again, it’s Bret Hart winning at Wrestlemania X. If Bryan doesn’t get there……I’m really interested to see where he goes from there. I’d be fine seeing him win though. Kane came out and got beaten up for his efforts, setting up their match on Smackdown.

Now we get to the part of the show I liked best. Rollins was in the back when Heyman and Lesnar came up to him. Lesnar simply threatened him and Rollins didn’t blink. Instead he looked Lesnar in the eye said he’s the future. Heyman was a key here as he sounded worried and offered an alliance to take out Cena. Seth stood there and the camera stayed on their faces the whole time for a great visual.

For the first time ever, I completely buy Rollins as a main event player, but the key here is he has the resume to back it up. Look back to Royal Rumble 2008 when Jeff Hardy was pushed against Randy Orton. That entire show was built around the idea that Hardy could win and it sold like nothing had in years.

However, at the end of the day, it was all hype because Hardy didn’t have the resume to be a believable World Champion. Now though, Rollins has both the resume and the skill to take the title at the Rumble and that little sliver of a chance makes the whole thing that much more interesting. This felt like a turning point and it couldn’t come at a better time.

Brie Bella beat Paige in a nothing match.

Bray Wyatt is in the Rumble and Randy Savage is in the Hall of Fame. Guess which one of these things gave me the biggest and most genuine smile I’ve had in wrestling in years.

Ascension destroyed more jobbers.

Rusev beat Ambrose via referee stoppage. Again, a loss due to an existing knee injury isn’t going to cripple Ambrose’s push and I continue to chuckle when people insist he’s being shoved down the card.

The Authority moderated a three way contract signing between Lesnar, Rollins and Cena. Again, Seth stood toe to toe with both of them and looked on their level. I can’t emphasize enough how important it is that Rollins has this kind of star power already. I’ll give you two guesses how this went. Thankfully it was Seth standing tall.

Oh yeah we’re in Rumble season and it’s working just as it’s supposed to. Rollins being added to that title match has made the whole thing feel so much more interesting and fresh, which is exactly what it’s been missing. I’m not sure who is coming out of that match with the title but I really want to see where it goes. The same is true of the Rumble itself, as suddenly it’s gone from the Roman Reigns show to “can Bryan do it again?” Adding something to the mix makes things that much better.

On the other hand you have the midcard, where things are stagnant again. Big Show vs. Reigns, Usos vs. Miz/Mizdow, Mizdow going solo, Rusev beating up various people and winning or escaping every time and Total Divas in general have all felt like they’ve been going on for months and it’s really hard to care at this point. Hopefully things shake up in the Rumble and it couldn’t happen at a at a better time. This week was a good show, mainly because they’re adding stuff into the main event scene to freshen it up.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 12, 2015
Location: Smoothie King Center, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: Booker T., John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

We’re back in the same building as the excellent post Wrestlemania Raw and the big story is what happens to the three guys (Ziggler, Ryback and Rowan) who were fired last week. The Authority is running roughshod on the company all over again and the question is will Cena be able to focus on his war against the team and get the title back from Lesnar at the Royal Rumble. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Authority’s return to Raw last week (after being on the show the previous week) and firing Erick Rowan, Dolph Ziggler and Ryback to end the show, followed by a major celebration for John Cena.

Here’s Cena to open the show. He doesn’t seem all that upset after costing three people their jobs last week. Cena talks about how New Orleans is about having a good time, even though the Authority is back in power. He can’t believe he works for two people who got their jobs back because their whipping boy held a Hall of Famer hostage and made Cena gamble with his health. That’s the same decision he would make every time though because it’s the right thing.

HHH is a first ballot Hall of Famer and one of the best of all time but he’s only going to be remembered as a slimy villain who wants to make us all miserable. Last week the Authority fired three men so Cena has to appeal to the audience. Did any of them deserve to be fired? Do the fans want to see them back tonight? Cena asks us to to go on social media and use the hashtag Authoritysucks to voice their opinions.

However, Cena has a backup plan: win the WWE World Heavyweight Title at the Royal Rumble. As soon as he can say THE CHAMP IS HERE, is the very moment that he can say you can’t see me. He’ll win the championship and go home until those three guys are rehired, or else this show’s most coveted prize is going away and won’t be at Wrestlemania.

This brings out the Authority with smirks on their faces. Stephanie laughs off the Authoritysucks bit and says the three guys will be thrilled to see Cena win the title and walk away. HHH expected more than seeing Cena take his ball and go home. He recaps Survivor Series again and talks about how the Authority was gone, but now they’ve found a way back in. A hero wouldn’t turn his back on WWE, but the Authority is going to give Cena another chance.

HHH polls the audience about bringing the three guys back and, upon hearing an affirmative reply, asks Cena how much he wants those three back. All Cena has to do to get their jobs back is win his match tonight. Cena asks how many guys he’s up against tonight but HHH says it’s nothing that complicated. It’s a one on one match with Seth Rollins but they’re going to make it a lumberjack match to keep things fair. Here come the lumberjacks because the match starts right now.

John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

We have Big Show, Kane, Cesaro and pretty much every other heel on the roster as lumberjacks. Rollins stomps him down to start and throws Cena to the floor for the traditional beating. A clothesline puts Rollins on the floor and he isn’t touched as we go to a break. Exactly as you would expect so far, meaning it’s time to crank it up in a few minutes when the NCAA National Championship game starts.

Back with Cena in trouble after Barrett tripped him during the break. Booker is calling this whole situation unfair as he’s the good guy commentator. The ProtoBomb sets up the Shuffle and the AA but the Stooges get on the apron, allowing Rollins to get outside. Cena dives onto the pile of lumberjacks and Fandango is holding his knee. I’ll let you make your own dancing jokes. Back in and Cena covers for two, only to eat the low superkick for the same. Seth goes up top and counters a superplex attempt into an across the ring buckle bomb for two. That kind of power out of Rollins always surprises me.

Cena tries a pop up powerbomb but doesn’t get under Rollins enough, making it look more like a spinebuster. Seth flips out of the AA and hits a standing Sliced Bread #2 for another near fall. There’s another AA but the lumberjacks (including Fandango who seems to be fine) pull Cena to the floor for a beating, including the Cesaro Swing into the barricade. Back in and the Curb Stomp is countered into the STF but Kane pulls Rollins’ arm towards the ropes. It turns into a tug of war over Rollins but Big Show pulls Cena to the floor for the KO Punch, giving Rollins the pin at 13:50.

Rating: B. This worked well but I’m really tired of seeing these two fight. In the span of less than a month, they’ve now had a regular match, a tables match, a cage match and a lumberjack match. That should be at least four months worth of matches but we’re getting it in four weeks. They’ve done the same thing with Ambrose vs. Wyatt and it’s having the same result: it’s really hard to care about what we’re seeing because they just had another big match a week or so ago.

The Usos are in Stephanie’s office when Dean Ambrose comes in. All three of them had some negative things to say on Smackdown about the firings. That’s fine and there are no firings. The Usos go to leave, but Stephanie stops them and asks Jimmy to tell Naomi that she’s competing with one arm behind her back tonight. As for Dean, he checked himself out of the hospital last week so he might be a danger to himself. Therefore, tonight he has to pass a psychiatric evaluation or he’s out of the Rumble. This has some potential if they do it right.

Miz talks about his close friend George Clooney winning the Cecil B. DeMille Award last night at the Golden Globes. Keep it up and he’ll win a Slammy.

It’s already time for the evaluation. Dean thinks he’s here because he’s been a “bad widdle boy.” Ambrose is freaked out by the doctor’s ticking clock and we go to a break. I love watching Dean be one step off and being all twitchy. It makes him seem like a more well rounded character instead of someone who was created in a board room to make sure he’s the best corporate character they can put together.

New Day vs. Cesaro/Tyson Kidd

It’s Kofi and Woods in action here with Big E. and Adam Rose on the floor. Cesaro and Kidd attacked Big E. last week because New Day is just too positive all the time. So they’re just curmudgeons? I approve of this gimmick. Kofi starts with Cesaro but Kidd gets a blind tag and kicks Kofi in the chest.

Cesaro stomps away and swings Kofi into the dropkick for two. Back up and Kofi kicks everyone down to the floor before diving over to Woods for the hot tag. The Honor Roll (flipping clothesline) drops Kidd and Cesaro gets low bridged to the floor. Rose gets on the apron but his distraction doesn’t work, allowing Woods to plant him with a backbreaker, followed by a top rope double stomp from Kofi for the pin at 3:48.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here and I’m liking the fact that New Day keeps winning, as long as their first loss isn’t something totally meaningless that ends with “oh, they lost.” Speaking of losing, it’s very frustrating to see Cesaro and Kidd put together for a team, just to see them job every time. Have they actually won a match yet?

We get a barrage of wrestlers doing their best OH YEAH in honor of Randy Savage being “expected” to be inducted into the Hall of Fame tonight. Above all else, I want Xavier Woods’ NES controller hat.

The Indianapolis Colts celebrates their win yesterday like Ric Flair.

Here’s Big Show for a chat. Whoever said that all men are created equal was obviously not a giant. Most of you were probably scared on your first day of work. On his first day, he beat Hulk Hogan for the World Title. The fans chant boring but Big Show laughs them off and calls everyone losers. Competition is supposed to be good for America, but no one wants competition at work. Everyone here would stab someone in the back for job security, just like he did to Cena.

That brings him to Roman Reigns, who he doesn’t see as competition. He sees Reigns like the New York Knicks, currently on a 15 game losing streak. Show is going to knock him into the front row next to Spike Lee (longtime Knicks fan) and make him a loser. Therefore, if you like Roman Reigns, you’re a loser as well.

Cue Reigns for the big brawl but Show walks out. Reigns thought he wasn’t a threat so why is Show leaving? Roman says he doesn’t want Show’s spot, but he does remember that first title win over Hogan. He was twelve years old or so and that makes him think of a story. A long time ago in a land far away, there was a little boy named Roman Reigns. It’s the story of Jack and the Beanstalk but Roman hit the giant in the mouth. The giant ran away, and that’s why Big Show is the loser.

Roman Reigns vs. Luke Harper

This has potential. Harper hammers away in the corner to start but Reigns knocks him to the floor as we take a break less than a minute in. Back with Reigns hitting a knee lift and raking Harper’s face across the rope. Three straight suplex attempts are blocked and Roman counters into a kind of Jackhammer. Someone really should use that as their finisher again. Harper dropkicks him out to the floor and sends Reigns hard into the steps. Back in and Harper busts out a freaking slingshot hilo for two. That’s not something a guy his size should be able to do.

Reigns comes back with a neckbreaker but Harper rips the face to break up the Samoan drop. Luke’s powerbomb is countered into something like the ProtoBomb. The Superman Punch is loaded up but Big Show throws a chair at Reigns. Naturally, that isn’t a DQ because wrestling rules as made up depending on the situation. A Boss Man Slam gets two for Harper but he turns into the Superman Punch. Show interferes again and Harper nails a superkick for two. The discus lariat misses though and a spear puts Harper away at 10:46.

Rating: B-. Luke Harper is a freaking STAR. He wrestles like someone Shawn Michaels’ size but has the look and size of a monster. Why aren’t we gearing up for a showdown between Harper and Reigns with Big Show being the cannon fodder? For reasons I will never understand, it looks like we’re not getting Show vs. Reigns (well, the blowoff at least as we’ve seen them fight twice already) until Fast Lane. That’s our reward for sticking with this show.

We recap the lumberjack match.

Miz talks about Boyhood winning Best Picture at the Golden Globes. It was filmed over several years with the same actors. Mizdow has been doing the same thing at Miz’s house, allowing him to film a movie called Manhood. Both guys shudder a bit.

Naomi vs. Alicia Fox

Naomi has one arm behind her back. Fox makes fun of her by trying a test of strength before getting two off a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. She cranks on the good arm until Naomi takes her to the floor for some rams into the apron. Back in and the ax kick gives Fox the pin at 2:37. This would be the match where you’re hit over the head with how mean the Authority is because you’re not smart enough to understand a concept without it being shown to you over and over.

Back to the evaluation, where Dean is going to look at pictures and saying the first word that comes to his mind. “THURSDAY!”

HHH – Irritable bowel syndrome

Rollins – Scumbag

Reigns – Brotha

Kane – Toothpaste

Duggan – HO!

Stephanie – HO!

Minor note here: Ambrose was bouncing up and down during the interview. It’s the little stuff like that which takes people to a new level. Instead of just sitting there waiting for his line, he’s actually doing something and staying in character. It feels so much more natural than the stiff and scripted stuff we usually get.

Here are Lesnar and Heyman for the first time in a few weeks. Heyman talks about being in New Orleans several months back, where we witnessed the Streak dying. Lesnar isn’t one to live in the past, but if he was, he would list off all of his accomplishments. No man has ever been NCAA, UFC and WWE Champion, but one beast has. Heyman however loves to live in the past and runs down the fans for being crushed when the Streak ended.

On the other hand, you have this fantasy in WWE of “then, now and forever.” The fantasy was the Streak running forever or that the Ce-Nation will rise above Lesnar at the Royal Rumble. Now the idea is that Rollins is the future of the WWE, but tonight Lesnar will see both challengers face to face.

More people give us their OH YEAHS with Miz knocking it out of the park and Nikki trying to make it sexy.

Jey Uso vs. Miz

Miz hits his running clothesline in the corner to start but jumps into a shot to the ribs. Jey loads up a slam and Mizdow comes in to slam himself off the top. The partners get involved in a tug of war, allowing Miz to grab a quick Skull Crushing Finale for the pin at 2:09. This feud needs to end like a month ago.

Here’s Daniel Bryan in the city where he won the World Title at Wrestlemania XXX. Bryan thinks something big happened here the last time he was in New Orleans. It slowly starts coming back to him that he won the main event of Wrestlemania XXX, which isn’t bad for a lumberjack looking B+ player. Since this is the city of his greatest accomplishment, he should declare his intention to do it all over again and win the main event of Wrestlemania XXXI.

This brings out Stephanie with a copy of her fitness DVD for Bryan, complete with a mini commercial. Bryan isn’t interested so Stephanie talks about making history at Wrestlemania XXX a couple of miles from here (the buildings are actually adjacent), but this is what she remembers. We see a clip of Kane tombstoning Bryan on the floor, steps and table. Stephanie says an A+ player not only wins the big one but stays on top.

She isn’t sure if he’s ready to do this again, but YES of course he is. Bryan: “Go ahead and raise your arms. I bet it’s a better workout than you get on that DVD. HO!” He’s an average Joe who will never stop fighting. They will never stop fighting. We will never stop fighting and go through Wrestlemania XXXI until they prove the Authority wrong again. Stephanie says Bryan’s first match back will be on Smackdown (this was already announced) against Kane. The monster comes out and the fight is on, but Bryan fights out of a tombstone on the steps and hammers away on Kane. He even busts out the Flying Goat.

Rollins is in the back when Lesnar comes up to mock the idea of Rollins winning the title. Seth stares him down and says he’s the future, but Lesnar says the future starts when he says it does. Heyman thinks maybe they can get rid of Cena together and then the best man wins. He looks very nervous about Rollins, who has stared Lesnar down the entire time. For the first time, I saw that real star power in Rollins from this one exchange. Simple but perfect.

Brie Bella vs. Paige

Natalya, Kidd and Nikki are at ringside. Paige goes right at her to start but gets sent into the buckle, allowing Brie to hit the middle rope dropkick. Paige fights out of a chinock but Kidd gets on the apron for a distraction, allowing Brie to roll her up for the pin at 2:10.

After the match, Paige slaps Kidd and Natalya doesn’t seem to mind. I love Paige, but I fully support anyone wearing a cat shirt.

We look back at last week’s ambulance match.

Bray Wyatt says thirty souls enter the Royal Rumble and 29 will have to realize that they’re not in Wonerland any longer. Some will laugh, some will cry but some will sit in silence at how Bray changes the world. No one on earth will be immune to his wrath. Run.

We finally have it confirmed: Randy Savage is the first entrant of the Hall of Fame Class of 2015. He will be inducted by Hulk Hogan.

Ascension vs. ???/???

Konor takes #1 into the corner to start as JBL is ripping on the jobbers again. Booker and Cole are a bit nicer and say they have to fight whoever they’re put up against and that they’ve won every match they’ve had so far. Fall of Man ends #2 at 1:20.

Ambrose is now counciling the doctor and gets his approval on the papers to stay in the Rumble. As soon as the papers are signed and the doctor is still crying, Ambrose calls him a spineless, gutless pile of cow waste. This really could have been a better comedy idea but it wasn’t bad.

Here are Lana and Rusev to thank the Authority for firing Ryback before the showdown tonight. They also thank Cena for failing to save his friends like any American would. Maybe Ryback can get a job in a deli like he had in that stupid story a few weeks back. Rusev calls Ryback lucky for being fired and because the super American John Cena couldn’t get his job back. He was going to throw Ryback and twenty eight other men out of the Rumble, so here’s Ambrose to easily knock him to the floor.

Rusev vs. Dean Ambrose

Joined in progress after a break with Ambrose bulldogging Rusev. The Russian kicks at the knee (injured in the ambulance match) to take over and wraps it around the ropes. Dean counters the jumping superkick into a rollup for two and the Macho Elbow gets the same. The referee tries to stop the match due to the knee and has no choice after Dean is tied in the Tree of Woe at 4:38.

Rating: C. This was more of an angle than anything else and Ambrose loses again, like he almost always does. At least in this case it wasn’t through another pin or submission and the loss can be blamed on the referee more than Ambrose. I did like them planting the seeds of Cena vs. Rusev though because that’s the big match at Wrestlemania, especially if Rusev wins.

Here’s the Authority to moderate the contract signing. After everyone comes out, Heyman says he can’t take credit for bringing back the Authority because it was all Rollins’ plan. The plan was endorsed by Heyman and desperately needed by John Cena. What’s bad for Cena is good for Lesnar and best for business. Heyman doesn’t like the idea of a triple threat match because it could mean a double cross where Lesnar doesn’t have to lose to drop the title.

Rollins thanks Heyman for reciting the rules of ever triple threat match ever and asks if Lesnar is scared of a triple threat. Paul gets cut off because Rollins isn’t done. Seth doesn’t have the list of accomplishments that Lesnar have, but Lesnar doesn’t have the list that Seth has. He built and destroyed the Shield, won Money in the Bank, and pinned John Cena’s shoulders to the mat. Either by plan A (the match) or plan B (the briefcase), Rollins is is leaving with the title. Lesnar says he conquered Undertaker, HHH and Cena, so he’ll conquer Rollins at the Rumble.

Cena says it’s time for a beating and he’s walking out champion before signing. Rollins lists off all the plans that Cena has had but failed before the fight is on. Seth is knocked to the floor and Lesnar takes the AA through the table, only to have Rollins Curb Stomp Cena. There’s a Curb Stomp to Brock to end the show.  More importantly than all else: Rollins looked like an equal.  That cannot be understated.

Overall Rating: B. Yes that’s probably high but man was this show easier to sit through. They actually had some good matches and set up some stuff for the future, but most importantly of all they had a chance to breathe. Instead of just packing every thing they possibly could into the show, there were a few breaks in there and it makes things so much easier.

On top of that though, the best moments were from Harper and Rollins. Those two looked AWESOME tonight and they gave me new hopes for both of them. Harper can move like almost no one else in the company and Rollins looked like a star standing there in front of Lesnar. I had a really good time with this show (save for a bit too much Stephanie) and didn’t once feel like it was dragging on forever. That’s the most important step in the right direction they could have.

Results

Seth Rollins b. John Cena – Pin after a KO Punch from Big Show

New Day b. Tyson Kidd/Cesaro – Backbreaker/top rope double stomp combo

Roman Reigns b. Luke Harper – Spear

Alicia Fox b. Naomi – Ax kick

Miz b. Jey Uso – Skull Crushing Finale

Brie Bella b. Paige – Rollup

Ascension b. ???/??? – Fall of Man to #2

Rusev b. Dean Ambrose via referee stoppage

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Smackdown
Date: January 2, 2015
Location: Norfolk Scope Arena, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tom Phillips, John Bradshaw Layfield

So the Authority is back because WWE can’t wait more than a few weeks without having a full time heel GM running the show. Other than that, Edge and Christian are allegedly in charge tonight, despite filing a multi-million dollar lawsuit against WWE on Main Event, because if there’s one thing WWE fans like more than evil authority figures, it’s the fun characters filing lawsuits. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the ending of Raw. Seth Rollins is awesome in this heel role and comes off as evil when he’s given the chance. I remember thinking that if he really wants to nail this, he’ll go to stomp Edge anyway, and that’s exactly what he did.

A somewhat subdued E & C open things up as Cole brings up the lawsuit. Edge (in a Cesaro shirt this time) says he’s played the scene from Raw in his head over and over and it’s his fault. He apologizes for what happened, but there’s nothing they can do physically to Rollins. Don’t worry though because there’s a John Cena sized missile coming after Rollins very soon. They have an amazing show planned and there’s nothing the Authority can do about it.

Before they can though, we see a limo on screen with the Stooges alone getting out. They head to the ring with Mercury holding a document. Edge suggests they climb under the bottom rope next time because it’s better suited to their height. The document is a prepared statement from the Authority, which says they didn’t know what Rollins was going to do on Monday.

The Authority officially apologizes and won’t interfere with Edge and Christian running Smackdown tonight, but the Stooges will be their official observers tonight. Edge smiles and makes his first match of the night: the Stooges vs. Ryback. The Stooges panic so Edge makes it Ryback vs. Big Show. Christian agrees that that’s a main event in any arena in the country, but thinks he can one up Edge with Rusev vs. Roman Reigns. Noble says this is going on their permanent files. Edge: “You know I don’t work here right?” He gets in their faces and says he and Christian are running things tonight, period.

Erick Rowan vs. Bray Wyatt

Bray tells Rowan to lay down because they’re not meant to fight. Erick goes right at him and drives Bray face first into the buckle but misses a charge into the post. Bray asks why Rowan is doing this to him and puts Rowan on the mat with his head against the post. He tries what looked like a clothesline and clearly didn’t touch Rowan’s head so I’m not sure what effect that was supposed to have. I know a lot of moves don’t connect but you can usually tell what they were supposed to be.

Back in and Rowan pops up because his genius IQ (remember that?) insulates his skull or something. He slams Bray around a few times and the fans buy into the false hope of the comeback attempt. Rowan slowly picks Bray up and says he’s sorry, only to eat Sister Abigail for the pin at 4:02.

Rating: D+. So is Rowan possibly going back to Wyatt? It’s better than whatever he’s doing now, which seems to be turning into a genius then forgetting about it while he jobs to Big Show. As usual, WWE builds someone up, gets bored with them and throws them out of their crib like a baby with a toy more than a week old. In this case though it was about two matches as Rowan has been treated like a joke since the day after Survivor Series.

Bray looks remorseful after getting the pin, almost like he feels sorry for having to hurt Rowan. Wyatt grabs the mic and says he gave their only begotten son. If he’s willing to do that to someone he loves, what is he going to do to Dean Ambrose on Monday? It’s been fun, but all good things must come to an end. Their story ends with Dean in the back of an ambulance. Follow the buzzards.

Edge and Christian make sure the Stooges hear them practicing the Five Second Pose. The Stooges cut it off and do it themselves in a bit that really isn’t as funny as they were shooting for.

R-Truth/Usos vs. Goldust/Stardust/Adam Rose

Rose tries to do WHAT’S UP and gets booed out of the space he’s standing in (there was nowhere near enough of a reaction for it to be out of the room). Truth even takes us back to the past with a WHOMP THERE IT IS! Adam tries the same and gets rolled up for two. Jey comes in and is quickly sent to the floor as we take a break. Back with powerslamming Jey for two. Goldust: “COME ON KEY!” At least that’s what it sounded like.

Off to Stardust to stand on Jey’s chest as the announcers go over the history of the Dusts and the Usos. They even manage to make that sound dull as there’s just no emotion in Phillips’ voice and it’s clear that he’s just reading this off a piece of paper in front of him. Go watch some Gorilla and Jesse to learn how to sound interested in something, even if there’s nothing interesting to talk about.

Jey gets popped in the mouth by Rose but knocks Adam and Stardust off the apron before backdropping Goldust out next to them. Jimmy (Uso, not Little Jimmy) comes in with some clotheslines for Rose and there goes the orange shirt. Everything breaks down and Truth dives onto Goldust, setting up the superkick and Superfly Splash to Rose for the pin at 8:20.

Rating: C-. So I guess it’s back to the Usos vs. Goldust/Stardust because almost a year of the same idea isn’t enough. I still can’t believe how badly they screwed up Rose. He should have had a job for years from just coming out to start a house show, getting the fans to dance and beating a low level heel (“This isn’t some party! This is business!”) in two minutes before dancing away. In other words, he should have been the PG version of the Godfather. Instead he’s this: a guy that feuds with a Bunny and R-Truth over a battle of rollups. Stop making things more complicated than they should be.

The Rosebuds try to go after Truth and the Usos and are dispatched with ease. The Usos steal their hats and it’s time to dance.

We look back at Bryan’s announcement from Raw. That’s such good news to hear as he’s worked so hard to get where he is and now he gets to keep going.

Ryback vs. Big Show

We get a clip of Ryback’s big speech on Monday where he talked about his career, including the bad leg injury he suffered back in 2010. The fans look so bored as Big Show comes through the curtain. Show easily shoves Ryback out to the floor and drags him back in by his head. Back in and Ryback drops him with some middle rope ax handles, but unfortunately that’s the extent of Randy Savage’s influence on this match.

We take a break and come back with both guys trading clubbing blows until Big Show drops him with a boot. Show goes after the leg, showing some thinking after Ryback mentioned the ankle and leg injuries almost ending his career. He takes Ryback’s knee pad down and lifts him up by the leg to stay on it. Off to an old school Lasso From El Paso but Ryback is right next to the ropes. I miss that hold but it wasn’t as good as the Haas of Pain. Big Show slams him down, making sure that the leg hits the ropes.

Ryback sends him out to the floor for a breather before firing off some shoulder blocks. A Thesz Press and Warrior Splash have Show in trouble but Ryback has to limp for a bit to pretend he knows how to sell. Doing your usual offense and then limping isn’t the same thing as selling an injury. The chokeslam is countered into a spinebuster but the Russian flag drops to break up the Meat Hook. The distraction lets Big Show KO Ryback to the floor for the countout at 11:30.

Rating: D+. This was a decent enough power match until Ryback just popped up and stopped selling the leg until he got his offense in. Big Show basically wasted his time on the leg, especially with the ending they went with. That being said, it wasn’t the worst idea in the world as they kept both guys looking strong, and you know Big Show isn’t going to lose a match when he can knock someone out and look dominant, because Big Show exists to be pushed as hard as he can.

JBL tries to save Ryback by saying he wasn’t completely out cold from the KO. In other words, he was starting to move his limbs at six. That’s his consolation prize. Rusev comes after Ryback but takes a Meat Hook to knock him outside again.

Christian is in the bathroom so Jamie Noble goes in to keep an eye on him. A woman screams and Edge says that was the women’s bathroom. COMEDY!

Cesaro/Tyson Kidd vs. Los Matadores

Thankfully they haven’t used the rumored name The Masters Of The WWE Universe for Kidd and Cesaro yet. They say they’re glad the Authority is back and want the titles in an inset interview. Fernando runs into Kidd’s elbow to start and his suicide dive hits Cesaro’s uppercut. Back in and Kidd hammers away before it’s off to Cesaro for a chinlock. Not the most exciting stuff in the world here.

They pick things up a bit with the Cesaro Swing into the dropkick from Kidd. That’s a really good spot when they can time it right. Kidd gets dropkicked out of the air and the lukewarm tag brings in Diego. Everything breaks down and Diego gets caught in a Cesaro powerbomb with Kidd adding a Blockbuster for the pin at 4:02.

Rating: D+. Kidd and Cesaro had some good double team spots but there aren’t enough of them to carry a match. Los Matadores were fun for awhile but they’ve dropped down to what people were expecting them to be when the gimmick was introduced: standard high flying jobbers that might get the crowd going for a few moments before losing. Dull match.

Dean Ambrose vs. Curtis Axel

The match never starts as Ambrose goes after Axel before the bell and lays him out with Dirty Deeds.

Ambrose grabs the mic and walks up the ramp, saying he hopes Bray is listening. They have the first ambulance match in the history of Monday Night Raw to kick off 2015. Dean walks up to an ambulance next to the ramp and promises to run Bray over, then break all of his fingers, then run him over again, then attach him to the ambulance and drag him around the arena. Then he’ll FINALLY put him into the ambulance and drive him away for a Happy New Year.

Ascension says first it was Hawk and Animal, then it was Ax and Smash, but now it’s Viktor and Konnor. I like that they’re acknowledging that they’re a modern version of the old school power tag team.

We look at the end of Raw again. Lesnar standing off in the background and looking annoyed intrigues me.

Ascension vs. ???/???

Ascension has gained 21lbs combined since Raw as they came in at a laughable 480 there and 501 here. Viktor fires off elbows in the corner to jobber #1 before it’s off to the 280lb Konnor, allegedly putting Viktor at 221. I have a problem believing he’s within a few pounds of CM Punk’s listed weight. After beating on #1 some more, the Fall of Man ends Jobber #2 at 1:20.

Edge and Christian are in the Authority’s office when the Stooges come in and say they need to get it ready for the Authority’s return. Is there a reason they’re setting up an office in Virginia when Raw is being held in Corpus Christi, Texas? The Stooges leave and the Canadians draw on the Authority’s Muscle and Fitness cover. This needed more Slick references.

Rusev vs. Roman Reigns

Non-title. Feeling out process to start with Rusev getting the first blows in as he stomps Reigns down in the corner. They’re being very liberal with the piped in chants again tonight. Reigns nails a quick clothesline to put Rusev on the floor and we take a break. Back with Reigns fighting out of a front facelock and snapping Rusev’s throat over the top rope. Rusev takes him down to the mat with a waistlock and the fans just go silent. The Russian mixes things up with a chinlock and the release fall away slam for two. Yet another chinlock makes me groan out loud.

Reigns blocks a ram into the buckle but Rusev throws him out to the floor. Back in and they shove each other a few times until Reigns nails some running clotheslines. A dropkick stops the Superman Punch but Reigns nails the second attempt. Reigns has to throw Rusev back inside and here’s the required Big Show interference. He doesn’t touch Reigns but eats a Superman Punch so we’re not done yet. The jumping superkick gets two but Reigns pops up with the spear, drawing in Big Show for the DQ at 13:12.

Rating: D. If this is the best they’ve got for Wrestlemania, they’re in big, big trouble. Reigns isn’t even bad in the ring or anything. He’s just REALLY boring a lot of the time, but to be fair a lot of this match was dull because of all the chinlocks and facelocks Rusev kept using. Reigns needs a lot more seasoning and a lot more character development before he’s ready for anything resembling a big time main event. There’s no emotion behind him and the best main events of Wrestlemania, or any major show for that matter, are usually built on the emotion the stars bring to the match.

Another thing working against this match was how obvious the ending was. The only question was whether it would be Ryback, Big Show or both guys interfering to cause the DQ. In other words, we sat through a boring match with an obvious ending to continue a feud that not a lot of people want to see to end a really dull show. Happy New Year people.

Post match Big Show spears Reigns and loads up a chokeslam, only to be slammed face first into the table. Show loads up another spear but misses and goes flying over the announcers’ table. Reigns turns the table over on Show to finally end the night.

Overall Rating: D-. I don’t know how fair it is to criticize Reigns at the moment because he’s stuck in one of the least interesting feuds I can remember in a very long time. This feud should have lasted all of two weeks but somehow they’re stretching it into the new year and it dies a little more every time they drag it out. We’ve seen Big Show built up as a monster for the better part of twenty years now and the story of someone bringing him down is the same almost every time. Why should we care more about it with Reigns instead of everyone else that has done this story over the years?

Other than that….dang this show was dull. The big problem here is they’re stuck in a holding pattern until Monday when the Authority is back full time, making tonight just a placeholder show until things really pick up on Monday, complete with slow speaking twenty five minute opening speeches with a bunch of “I told you so’s”. The wrestling was nothing special and felt like a waste of my time for the most part.

That being said, there’s a good deal of hope for the future as the Rumble field is shaping up and Lesnar is wide open after Cena. It’s Wrestlemania season and hopefully that means they’re going to put in some efforts and fresh ideas instead of the same tired old feuds and stories. Maybe this is the last of the bad shows for awhile, but I’m not thrilled with what they’ve done with Smackdown in the last few weeks. This show was a disaster and really felt like a chore to sit through rather than something I was supposed to enjoy.

Results

Bray Wyatt b. Erick Rowan – Sister Abigail

Usos/R-Truth b. Adam Rose/Goldust/Stardust – Superfly Splash to Rose

Big Show b. Ryback via countout

Cesaro/Tyson Kidd b. Los Matadores – Powerbomb/Blockbuster combo to Diego

Ascension b. ???/??? – Fall of Man to #1

Roman Reigns b. Rusev via DQ when Big Show interfered

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