ECW on TNN
Date: November 26, 1999
Location: Aragon Ballroom, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 3,912
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

It’s the day after Thanksgiving which means the Cowboys are probably on a losing streak. When may be a bit more surprising is that with this episode, I’ll be ¼ done with the entire series. Think about that for a minute. This show wasn’t even on the air for 60 episodes. The next PPV isn’t for a month and a half so we’ve got some time to fill. Let’s get to it.

After a very quick intro by Joel and Joey, here’s Jerry Lynn to open things up. Joey asks him if he’s in league with Tajiri and Jerry says that’s it for this interview and leaves.

Theme song.

Rhyno tells Candido that Candido needs to find him a warmup match or Candido will get the warmup beating. Sunny implies she’ll de-hornify Rhyno if he gives her ten minutes.

TV Title: CW Anderson vs. Rob Van Dam

During RVD’s entrance, we cut to New Jack in New York looking for the Baldies. New Jack flat out says he wants to rape Angel. We miss the opening of the match because of a merchandise plug. Anderson is in control to start with a headlock and left hand in the corner. Van Dam comes back with a sunset flip and spinwheel kick to take over. Another kick takes Anderson down and the cartwheel moonsault gets two. CW comes back with a superkick (WAY too popular of a move in ECW) for two and a neckbreaker for the same.

Anderson goes up but gets crotched. When has going to the top EVER gone well for someone named Anderson? Yes, they’re actually pushing him as Arn’s relative, which I hope has some tongue in cheek aspects to it here. They head to the floor with Van Dam putting him over the barricade and hitting the spinning leg to Anderson’s back. Back in and a spinebuster puts Van Dam down for two. That doesn’t seem to matter though as a few kicks put Anderson down and the Five Star retains the title.

Rating: C-. This was your normal TV Title match for Van Dam: he comes out, he gets the crowd fired up, he hits some kicks, he retains the title, the fans all say it’s way better than it really was. Anderson was supposed to be a big time heel in ECW but he never quite got anywhere with it, other than an I Quit match with Dreamer which again wasn’t as great as people make it out to be.

New Jack is still looking for the Baldies. He annoys the one person he finds on a NEW YORK CITY subway and that’s about it.

We come back to the arena and Sabu is fighting Van Dam.

TV Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Sabu

Why is Sabu out here? No reason given. Why are tag partners fighting? No reason given. Van Dam kicks Sabu down but gets crotched as he goes up. Sabu hits a springboard hurricanrana off the top for two. Fonzie slides in a chair which goes upside Van Dam’s head. The Triple Jump Moonsault mostly misses and we head to the floor. Van Dam dives into the crowd onto Sabu and we take a break.

Back with Van Dam on a table between the barricade and ring with Sabu diving off the top through it. Sabu slams him down in the ring…..and we take another break? Back with Sabu falling on the chair as he loads up another Triple Jump Moonsault which apparently hurt his knee. Van Dam goes after the knee and here are Candido and Rhyno to beat both guys up.

Van Dam and Sabu kick them down with chairs before Van Dam hits a flip dive over the top to take both guys out. Sabu tries a dive of his own but the knee gives out. Van Dam goes back in and works on the knee, hitting a Five Star onto the chair onto the knee. He puts on a bridging Indian Deathlock and Fonzie throws in the towel.

Rating: N/A. This is one of those matches where the match went long enough to get a rating, but there was so much other stuff going on that there is no way to fairly grade it. These two would have a title match at the PPV which Van Dam would win, but that begs the question of why give it away for free here? That’ll come up later on so we’ll get to it in a bit.

Little Guido vs. Super Crazy

Before we start what should be a good match, we go back to New Jack in the subway. He’s on the #6 train. Actually he’s in front of it so he’s already lying. Once again we miss the opening and come back to see Guido taking him to the mat. A cross armbreaker is broken up and we have a standoff. They both counter a few moves until Crazy tries a standing Lionsault but gets dropkicked out of the air.

Guido drops a knee to the face of Crazy but Crazy stops to go after Big Sal. After Crazy escapes Sal’s clutches, Guido misses a dive onto Crazy and Crazy hits an Asai Moonsault onto both of them. Back in and Guido hits a top rope Fameasser for two. The idea of selling doesn’t mean much in ECW. In a cool move, Crazy sets for a Lionsault but Guido pops up onto the ropes and hits a Russian Leg Sweep off the middle rope for two.

Crazy gets powerbombed out of the corner for two. Again the lack of selling is ridiculous. A tornado DDT puts Guido down for a delayed two. A top rope flip dive gets the same and it’s time to punch in the corner. Big Sal comes in and crushes the referee before getting ranaed by Crazy. Tajiri and Lynn come in for no apparent reason and beat up Crazy to give Guido the pin.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t dull but it wasn’t any good. The problem here was that instead of a coherent match with any flow or psychology (or selling) to it, they were just hitting random moves on each other until the run-in which made no sense at the end. The annoying thing about ECW is that Crazy vs. Guido could be a good match but they have to overbook it so much that it loses whatever it could have going for it.

Lance Storm/Justin Credible/Rhyno vs. Tommy Dreamer/Raven/Sandman

Here’s a rematch of November to Remember’s main event, because why pay for it when you can get it for free here? Then again why would you pay for it in the first place? Back to New York and the Baldies were on another train and leave with no confrontation. Yep, that’s the payoff after all that build up. Before Sandman and Raven get here, Dreamer goes after Credible. It turns into a three on one beating and here’s Raven for the save. That goes badly for Bird Boy as Storm kicks him down. A chair is brought in and Storm goes face first into it, giving the tag champs (Dreamer and Raven) the advantage.

We have like six minutes of airtime left and Sandman hasn’t started his entrance yet. Dreamer gets double teamed by Rhyno and Storm in the ring while Credible beats on Raven on the floor. Here comes Sandman so the heels all stop what they’re doing. You know, because a guy staring at them is enough to make them stop beating on their opponents.

Sandman comes in and misses everyone before Storm superkicks him down. There’s no semblance of a match here at all as it’s just a big brawl. Dreamer piledrives Rhyno and Francine hits Storm low. Dawn does the same to Dreamer and we have a Catfight. Sandman hits the White Russian Leg Sweep on Justin for two. Raven loads up a DDT on Storm but Sandman hits his partner with the cane and Storm pins him.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t a match. It was a wild brawl with the occasional wrestling move thrown in. When you have a wrestling match for me to rate, let me know. Nothing to see here.

New Jack finds a Baldie but a single shot to the back from another one knocks him out.

Overall Rating: D. The problem with ECW on TNN is that it’s very obvious that there are only about three stories going on in the entire show. You have Sabu vs. Van Dam (with no reason given as to why they’re fighting), the Dreamer/Raven stuff, and the Baldies vs. New Jack. Other than that, there’s NOTHING going on here. If I don’t care about any of those stories, I have no reason to watch. The problem on top of that is that these stories aren’t fleshed out at all. Basically the people are fighting because they’re supposed to be fighting. That’s not good and it’s not working here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

ECW on Sci-Fi
Date: September 12, 2006
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re coming up on Unforgiven and in a bit of a lull for ECW. We aren’t ready to talk about December to Dismember yet but we don’t really have anything planned for in between then. My guess would be we have random matches that don’t add up to much until then which is par for the course. Oh and we’re in the World’s Most Famous Arena tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with Heyman and his masked bodyguards in the ring. He talks about the deal he made to bring ECW to the big time and again says that the fans owe him a thank you. The way he’s speaking is kind of strange as you can tell he thinks what he’s saying is bull, but he’s a native New Yorker and he has ECW in Madison Square Garden. It’s an interesting combination.

Sabu almost immediately runs out and goes after the guards with a chair, knocking them to the floor. Heyman makes Big Show vs. Sabu later on in an extreme rules match. In theory that wouldn’t be for the title but you never know with his mindset after awhile. Sabu dives onto the guards because he’s a bit out there.

Rob Van Dam vs. Hardcore Holly

Van Dam jumps him to start and snaps off a fast rana before being backdropped to the floor. Holly busts out a pescado which is a rare thing to see from him. This is as a result of Holly jumping Van Dam recently at the request/suggestion of Heyman, who hates Van Dam for some reason. Back in and a legdrop gets two for Holly who is in full control. A middle rope elbow kind of misses as I think Van Dam got his foot up but it looked odd.

Either way Van Dam is making his comeback here and hits the step over kick followed by Rolling Thunder for a delayed two. A monkey flip sends Holly out of the corner and Van Dam heads up. Holly crotches him but the superplex is broken up. The Five Star is loaded up again but here are Stevie Richards and Mike Knox for the DQ for no apparent reason.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but it was too short to go anywhere. Holly was a guy that they wanted to be a big deal in ECW, but at the end of the day he’s the same guy that has been a joke on the main two shows for years leading up to this. It’s hard to take him seriously when he was the guy running around with Crash for all those years.

Van Dam beats those two up but Test comes out as well, hitting the full nelson slam to take him out. Sandman and Dreamer finally run in for the save. Everyone hits Richards with something and the Five Star finishes his murder.

CM Punk vs. Shannon Moore

Two matches without a commercial or segment? I’m stunned. This is Moore’s ECW debut. He slaps Punk in the face to start and pounds him down which is probably about the extent of his offense here. Punk jumps over Moore in the corner and hooks the Tarantula Vice in the ropes. A series of strikes to the ribs stops Moore dead as the fans are chanting for Punk. The corner knee/bulldog hits and the high kick sets up the Rock Bottom into the Anaconda Vice for the tap. Basically just a squash.

Rene Dupree is looking in a mirror.

Punk talks about all the guys he wants to fight when Kelly Kelly comes up to hit on him. She asks him out but Mike Knox makes the save. I think I smell a feud.

The villain in The Marine says the movie is cool.

Ariel and Kevin Thorn come out for the next match.

Rene Dupree vs. Balls Mahoney

Dupree jumps him to start but Balls comes back with the signature punches in the corner. A charge hits the post for Mahoney though and a bottom rope splash gets two for Rene. Taz: “That’s extreme?” A middle rope elbow gets the same and I can’t believe I’m watching this on ECW.

I get the idea that they’re going with to have Dupree as a heel in ECW, but it doesn’t change the fact that we’ve had guys like Shannon Moore, Mike Knox and Rene Dupree on this show. Mahoney snaps off the Nutcracker Sweet (sitout spinebuster) for two and they head to the floor. Balls gets a chair but Thorn kicks him into the steps, giving Dupree the pin.

Rating: D. Like I said, at the end of the day you can only get so into a match about Rene Dupree. Mahoney is one of the holdovers from the original ECW who at least looks like he belongs on a show about Extreme wrestling. This wasn’t good by almost any standard but it set up Thorn vs. Mahoney which is less dull than this was.

Matt Striker doesn’t like Sandman or the people drinking his “giggle water”. I give up.

ECW World Title: Big Show vs. Sabu

This is non-title. Ok apparently it is for the belt. Why would Heyman agree to that? He and the bodyguards are at ringside and Heyman is panicking as Sabu sets up tables before the bell. We take a break and come back with Sabu holding a chair in the ring and the bell rings. Show swats that away with ease and knocks him out to the floor. Back in and Show throws the chair to the floor and clotheslines Sabu down for two. This is going very slowly so far.

Sabu finally wakes up and takes out Show’s leg followed by a chair shot. Then Sabu shows that he’s an idiot by trying a freaking camel clutch on BIG SHOW. Show gets caught on the top rope and kicked to the floor but it doesn’t really do anything to him. The fans want tables so Show sets one up in the ring, making him a face for about 5 seconds. Sabu picks up a chair but looks scared to swing it.

The chokeslam is countered by Sabu into a DDT through the table for two. For a crowd that wanted tables, they didn’t seem to be that interested in it once Show was put through it. Sabu pelts the chair at Show and knocks him through the table on the floor. The crowd again doesn’t seem too interested. Show goes into the post and Sabu gets in a chair shot to the back. Air Sabu to the floor is caught in a chokeslam through another table and Sabu is in big trouble. The Cobra Clutch backbreaker sets up the standing legdrop (called the Showstopper here) for the pin.

Rating: D+. The crowd told the story here: no one bought Sabu as a real threat to Show at all and why should they have? Show has been completely dominant unless he’s against more than one person, and Sabu’s offense isn’t made to face someone like Show, who is way too big and strong for a small guy like Sabu. Some of the bumps were decent but there was no way they could make this be exceptionally good.

Overall Rating: D+. I know I talked about the problems they were having with the ECW guys being the focus, but now we’ve reached a new section of problems for ECW. No matter what you call it or repackage these guys as, no one was going to care about Rene Dupree, Hardcore Holly, Test and Mike Knox. Those guys aren’t people that are going to create interest at all. They’ve been jobbers for so long on Raw and Smackdown that no one was going to buy them as threats anywhere. That’s what wound up happening and it wasn’t for a good many months that the problem got solved.

Here’s Unforgiven if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/08/12/unforgiven-2006-the-year-of-cena-begins/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

ECW on Sci-Fi
Date: August 22, 2006
Location: Wachovia Arena, Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re past Summerslam now and Big Show is still champion, having beaten Sabu at Summerslam. The main event tonight: Big Show vs. Sabu for the ECW Championship. We also have Matt Striker, who is making his ECW debut tonight after a long time on Raw. We also get a bikini contest between Kelly and Torrie, which I’m sure will be riveting. Let’s get to it.

Theme song opens us up.

We open with Torrie and Kelly in their bikini contest. Torrie is in FHM this month. She disrobes first and looks good but Mike Knox stops Kelly from disrobing. Test is with him for the sake of setting up a six man tag. Dreamer and Sandman come in and we’re ready to go.

Torrie Wilson/Tommy Dreamer/Sandman vs. Test/Mike Knox/Kelly Kelly

The girls go at it quickly and the fans freak out. Torrie is in a bikini so we get a Stinkface. So that’s where Kelly learned it. Test and Dreamer come in, thank goodness, with Test poking him in the eye to take over. A trio of backbreakers gets two. Knox comes in and stays on the back of Dreamer as the fans tell Knox that he can’t wrestle.

Test comes in and takes out Sandman before throwing Dreamer in a bearhug. Dreamer finally gets out and hooks a neckbreaker to give himself a breather. Off to Sandman and Knox but it’s Test who gets caught in the White Russian Legsweep. Sandman hits a Swanton (Rolling Rock) on Knox for two. After some interference from Test, Knox misses a middle rope legdrop. Dreamer DDT gets the pin on Knox.

Rating: D. This was a mess and the girls didn’t add anything to it, but they were only involved for about 30 seconds so it’s not that big of a deal. The match was boring though as it was just old school vs. new school which would be the story on this show for months on end. Sandman was a nostalgia act at this point but he got paid for a few months out of it so I can’t complain much there. Not a good match but it got the crowd a bit fired up so I can’t complain much.

Show tells Heyman not to worry tonight because it’s a one on one match with no weapons for Sabu to use.

Matt Striker is in the back and says he’s our teacher. The letters ECW bring about images of barbarism but those aren’t good. Therefore, he’s going to educate us in the future.

Kevin Thorn vs. Balls Mahoney

Extreme Rules. Thorn jumps Balls before he can use the chair and we’re off fast. Balls comes back with right hands and a HARD kick to the face. Out to the floor for a good beating of balls. Back in and Thorn beats Balls with a stick. These jokes write themselves. The stick gets rammed into Balls’ throat (there is such a thing as making this too easy you know) but Mahoney comes back with punches and the Nutcracker Sweet for two. Balls goes to get a chair but Ariel bites him on the way back in. A chair shot and the elevated Stunner get the pin for Thorn. Quick match with more unintentional comedy than anything else.

More Shannon Moore stuff. The system is oppressive I see.

CM Punk vs. Christopher W. Anderson

He’s doing the IT’S CLOBBERIN TIME already. Anderson is introduced as Christopher W. Anderson but screw that, he’s CW Anderson. Anderson takes him into the corner and we actually get a clean break. Joey and Tazz argue over how much coffee Anderson had in the original ECW. They go to the corner again and Anderson kills him with the left, resulting in a left/right joke series from our commentators. Anderson works on the arm in the corner but gets caught in the Vice around the ropes. The knee/bulldog combination conencts but Punk walks into a spinebuster for two. Never mind as it’s strike sequence, Rock Bottom, Vice, tap.

Sabu says he’ll win tonight.

Trailer for The Marine.

Heyman talks to someone and tells them to make an impact tonight. It’s Hardcore Holly and Heyman whispers a name to Holly which Hardcore isn’t thrilled with. Whoever he whispered has been making trouble for Holly in the locker room.

Danny Doring vs. Rob Van Dam

Doring tries to speed things up but gets his head kicked off instead. Danny drops some elbows on the back to take over but Van Dam has had enough of that. The monkey flip sets up the top rope kick and Doring is in trouble. Rolling Thunder hits and the Five Star finishes the squash.

Post match Hardcore Holly jumps Van Dam with a chair. He hits Doring for good measure before giving Van Dam the Alabama Slam.

Highlight video of Summerslam.

Rene Dupree says he’s the best athlete ECW has ever had.

ECW Title: Big Show vs. Sabu

Sabu pounds away to start but gets beaten down almost as quickly. Some LOUD chops put Sabu down so Show picks him up and drops Sabu onto the top rope and out to the floor. We take a break and come back with Show choking away even more. During the break there’s been a table set up at ringside, apparently to taunt Sabu.

Sabu breaks up a bearhug with a poke to the eye. The referee goes down, as does Sabu to a fallaway slam. Sabu uses the referee being down to get some chair shots in, taking Big Show down. Triple Jump Moonsault hits but there’s no referee. Arabian Facebuster hits and a second referee counts two. Sabu gets the bell and clocks Show with it in front of the referee for the DQ.

Rating: D+. This didn’t really have time to do anything, but it wasn’t all that interesting watching Sabu get thrown around and then a ref bump followed by a stupid DQ. These two would feud for awhile while we waited to get something better going in the main event. This was fine for a filler feud though.

Post match Sabu hits him again with the bell, busting Show open. He knocks him through the table (great sound effect) and HOKEY SMOKE Show is busted bad. There’s a freaking pool of blood on the ground. It’s legit scary looking actually.

Overall Rating: D+. It wasn’t a great show, but there was a major shift this week as the main event only ran about five minutes (not counting commercial) as opposed to the usual 15 minutes or so it had been getting up to this point. That can be seen as either good or bad, in that it gives more time to other acts, but it also takes away the long match. In ECW’s case though, with just an hour a week, spending ¼ of the show on a single match wasn’t the best idea. The shift here is good and the show had a lot more to it as a result. The problem is the additional stuff here wasn’t that great.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

ECW on Sci-Fi
Date: August 22, 2006
Location: Verizon Center, Washington D.C.
Attendance: 8,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re back for another episode and it’s the last show before Summerslam. That being said, Big Show needs an opponent. We saw the return of Rob Van Dam last week to attack both Big Show and Sabu, so my guess is it’ll be Van Dam or Sabu challenging Show on Sunday. Is that a ladder I see over there? Let’s get to it.

We open with Heyman and Show in the back. Heyman says that Angle has been injured and is medically suspended for the time being. He was supposed to be in the ladder match later on, but now it’s just Van Dam vs. Sabu.

Here’s Foley in the arena. We get a clip of Melina and Foley beating up Flair last night. This was to set up their match at Summerslam which is pretty forgotten today. Foley talks about how last night he invited Flair to come here tonight but Naitch isn’t going to be here. This is because of a real life argument they had over Flair calling Foley a glorified stuntman and Foley saying Flair had the same match for years.

Foley goes into a big rant about what he went through against Undertaker in the Cell, which Flair says was just accidentally falling off the Cell. What Flair never gets is that Foley has always liked what he sees when he looks in the mirror, and that’s what he’ll do on Monday after the match with Ric. He talks about being a two time bestselling author and calls out…..Kelly Kelly?

Here she is and with a much slower version of her signature song. He also brings out Melina which is a big shock to Tazz for some reason. Foley says it’s time for a three way dance, so the girls grind on each other and Foley dances like Dude Love. This draws out Flair and the fight is on. A low blow stops Mick and Flair takes off his belt to whip Foley, followed by some choking. Flair shouts about how Foley is going to quit on Sunday and leaves. This was a, shall we say, interesting use of the first ten minutes of the show.

Shannon Moore says to question authority.

CM Punk vs. Justin Credible

Justin slaps him and gets kicked as a result. Into the corner and Punk does Joe’s Facewash for two. A top rope crossbody is countered into a gutbuster for two for Credible. Abdominal stretch goes on for a bit but Punk comes back with strikes. A bad kind of release tornado DDT gets two. Punk comes back with the knee in the corner, a high kick, a Rock Bottom and the Vice for the tap out. Short match but it did its job.

Video on RVD. This is followed by him sitting on a ladder, talking about being in MITB at Wrestlemania. He won that as well as the world title, and now he wants it back.

Rene Dupree is still coming.

Mike Knox/Test vs. Little Guido/Tony Marmaluke

Guido and Knox starts and the beating begins. Test comes in and the beating continues. The beating ends with a pair of big boots and a TKO to Mamaluke. Total squash.

Dreamer and Sandman chase off Knox and Test post match.

Sabu says he’ll win.

Heyman talks to Show and the security guards when Angle runs in. He beats up the security with ease and hammers on Big Show but finally gets taken down. Cops show up to handcuff Angle and take him out.

Rob Van Dam vs. Sabu

Ladder match and the winner gets Big Show on Sunday. Feeling out process to start and we get our first possible botch as Van Dam tries his springboard kick out of the corner but it hits Sabu in the leg as he was trying something else at the same time. Van Dam goes up but gets stopped by some shots to the face. Sabu tries Air Sabu but gets crotched in another botch. This REALLY isn’t starting out well.

Van Dam tries to jump from the top to get the contract which I’m surprised more people haven’t tried before. A Cactus Clothesline puts both guys on the floor and Sabu goes for the first ladder. Van Dam makes the save and both guys head back in, sans ladder. A spike DDT puts Rob down and now we get the first ladder brought in. Scratch that as Van Dam hits a baseball slide into the ladder to keep it on the floor.

Van Dam hits a dive onto Sabu and the ladder as we take a break. Back with Sabu hitting the Arabian Facebuster onto the ladder. There’s the camel clutch, also on the ladder but it’s broken very quickly. Sabu sets the ladder up but Van Dam shoves it down before he can get anywhere. Sabu tries the triple jump moonsault using the ladder and falls flat on his back. Rob throws him into the ladder in the corner but misses a charge. In a GREAT counter, Van Dam monkey flips the ladder itself into Sabu. That was awesome.

Rolling Thunder hits onto Sabu onto the ladder, but it was minus Sabu and Van Dam’s back is hurt. Now the triple jump moonsault hits as Sabu used the chair instead of the ladder like a freaking idiot would. Van Dam gets in another shot and goes up the ladder but Sabu makes a quick save. Sabu goes to his old standard: throwing the ladder at Van Dam’s head.

Van Dam kicks him down again and hits the Five Star but it only does so much good here. His ribs are more messed up than they already were but he goes up anyway. Sabu is down on the floor, so there’s no reason for Van Dam to go slowly, other than Big Show missing his cue as he does here. Show FINALLY comes in and throws Van Dam off the ladder and through a table. Show calls for the contract to be lowered but Sabu dives at him and lands in a powerbomb position, but it’s enough to grab the lowered contract and get the title shot.

Rating: D. You know how I always talk about how Sabu needs someone to keep him calmed down or it can get ugly? This was what happens when it gets ugly. Some of these botches were just HORRIBLE and it ruined whatever they might have had going with the match. The monkey flip spot was great and the ending was creative, but the stuff getting up to that was just horrible.

Show chokeslams Sabu onto the contract (despite having a chair and a ladder in the ring) and chokeslams RVD as well. Sabu eats the contract to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This show FLEW by and I’m not sure it worked for the most part. The main event was too sloppy to be worth much, the opening segment was about a Raw issue instead of an ECW issue, and the other two matches were squashes. It wasn’t a horrible show I guess, but it went by so fast with so little happening that it really didn’t have a chance to be good.

Here’s Summerslam if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/09/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2006-hogan-and-dx-are-in-charge-are-we-in-1998/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

ECW on Sci-Fi
Date: August 29, 2006
Location: Sovereign Center, Reading, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Joey Styles, Taz

It’s another week in and the show continues to be decent, at least in theory. Tonight is all about furthering Heyman vs. Sabu in the battle of ECW past, which is probably the best feud this show has going. Also tonight we have RVD vs. Hardcore Holly, which if I remember right has a scary bump in it, but that might be a rematch later on. Let’s get to it.

We open with Heyman of course. He talks about how this is his creation and how he’s our messiah as usual. Heyman has never wrestled in ECW, although I’d assume that’s probably a good thing. Tonight he’s getting into the ring against…..Sabu. I don’t see this going well. He says that Dr. Frankenstein must destroy his own creation and beat his own child tonight in the ring.

Rob Van Dam vs. Hardcore Holly

This is a followup to last week where Holly jumped Van Dam with a chair. Holly goes right for him but gets kicked down and clotheslined to the floor very quickly. Van Dam puts him on the barricade and this his spin kick to the back. Back in the Alabama Slam is countered but Holly throws Rob to the floor to take over. Off to a HARDCORE chinlock before the dropkick gets two. Van Dam kicks his head off to put both guys down but manages to get up first. A superkick and standing moonsault get two. Windmill kick sets up Rolling Thunder but the Five Star misses. Holly brings in a chair but Rob hits him with it for the DQ.

Rating: D+. That was a pretty lame ending to a pretty weak match. This was only about five minutes long and while they would feud for a few weeks before Van Dam beat him in an Extreme Rules match (meaning this wasn’t the match I was talking about in the intro), this was a bad opener to the feud. Not much to see here.

Rene Dupree rides an exercise bike and says he’s the most extreme wrestler.

Here’s Big Show for a chat. He talks about how dominant he is and how the McMahons saw that. That’s why they enlisted him to help in their battles with DX. You mean it’s not because there’s no way to believe that Vince and Shane can fight Shawn and HHH so they needed to bring in some heavies to do the work for them? DX’s fate will be sealed at Unforgiven in the Cell but if they want, they can come face him here next week.

Shannon Moore says fight the power.

CM Punk vs. Stevie Richards

Richards actually gets an intro. They go to the mat to start and Richards fires away with some chops. Punk knocks him to the floor and hits a suicide dive to take over, but back inside Richards crotches him on the top to slow Punk down again. Off to a bearhug from Stevie but Punk breaks out of it very quickly. Punk hammers away with his strikes and hits a butterfly backbreaker for two. Richards ducks the backfist but walks into the Rock Bottom and Anaconda Vice for the tap.

Rating: C+. This was a nice surprise as Punk got tested instead of rolling over the latest ECW jobber that he was facing. Richards is a guy that never quite gets the appreciation that he deserves, because he’s most remembered as a comedy guy. He could have some entertaining matches though when he was just being himself, which is what you got here. This was a surprisingly entertaining match.

Video on Sabu.

It’s Matt Striker’s Classroom. He says he’s a teacher and he’s here to help. For some reason people don’t cheer for him though, because they’d rather cheer for the Sandman. You know, the guy who drinks “giggle water.” Sandman is constantly drunk and has a Singapore Cane, but Striker’s weapon is his mind. Cue Sandman, but Striker actually beats him down, breaking the chalkboard over his head and hitting him with a stapler before leaving.

Balls Mahoney is in the back and has something to say when Kelly comes up and flashes him. Ok then.

Taz and Joey explain that Angle is gone and wish him the best in his future endeavors.

Paul Heyman vs. Sabu

It’s Extreme Rules. The security guards (the Bashams but I don’t think that was ever revealed on TV) jump Sabu on the way to the ring of course. Since this is ECW though Sabu beats up both guards who are in riot gear, but Big Show makes save #2 for Heyman before Sabu can, you know, kill him. Show CRACKS Sabu’s head with a chair as I’m sure you can get where this is going already. Sabu is busted already and the three guys not named Heyman beat him down with Big Show holding him so Paul can get in a shot.

We get out first table of the night (that has to be a record for ECW as the show is almost over) as Heyman dances around the ring and calls himself the Messiah. Show lifts Sabu up into a gorilla press position to put him through the table on the floor, but of course he holds him just long enough for RVD to come out for the save. Van Daminator takes down Big Show and it’s kicks for the Bashams.

Sabu finally gets his hands on Heyman and destroys him for a bit, even hitting the Arabian Facebuster. Sabu and Van Dam put Heyman on the table but Big Show pulls Sabu out of the air on the dive attempt. That’s always cool to see. Cue run-in #5 (I’ve lost count) in the form of Hardcore Holly. He hits the Alabama Slam to Van Dam through the table as Show hits that walking legdrop thing, giving Heyman the pin.

Rating: C-. This is more ECW’s style: a totally mindless and insane brawl with massive carnage. It was clear what they were going for as soon as they said Extreme Rules, but that’s ok here. They had to do something to keep this from being Heyman getting killed for eight minutes, and having all these people come out allows for more stories to be advanced. Not a good match or anything but it was fun in an insane sort of way.

Sabu gets put through a table to end the show. Heyman makes the sign of the cross over Sabu’s body.

Overall Rating: C-. This wasn’t their best show. The main feud is starting to get some traction but it’s not exactly the most interesting story in the world. Big Show would hold the title for the next three months or so which didn’t really do much for the level of interest in the title. The show here was getting more coherent but it wasn’t exactly interesting.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

ECW on Sci-Fi
Date: September 5, 2006
Location: Columbus Civic Center, Columbus, Georgia
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Tonight we get really EXTREME as DX is here to face Big Show, which is basically a preview for Unforgiven and their Cell match which will also involve the McMahons. Other than that we have Heyman punishing RVD and Sabu for existing by putting them in a tag match against Knox and Test. Then again that might be punishment for all of us in general. Let’s get to it.

DX arrives to open the show. Shawn: “You think this is the place?” HHH: “Bingo.”

Sabu/Rob Van Dam vs. Mike Knox/Test

Extreme Rules. Sabu and Knox start because you have to tag in an EXTREME rules match. They have about as technical of a match as Sabu has ever had before it’s off to Van Dam. Knox comes in as well and pounds away as Sabu loads up a table. He gets a chair as well as Knox drops a freaking elbow for two. This match is already boring me to death and we’re only two minutes into it.

Test comes in with a clothesline and sends Van Dam to the floor. The Originals hit a nice slingshot legdrop and Rolling Thunder combo as things breaks down. Van Dam hits a top rope kick to break up Sabu being thrown through the table. Through a series of counters everyone but Sabu winds up on the apron. He springboards off the chair to take all three of them down and through said table in the first good spot of the match.

Back from a break with Test hitting Sabu with a chair for no cover. Van Dam blasts Test with the same chair and Surfs it into the corner. Knox breaks up the Five Star with a chair shot and hits a superplex. Sabu breaks up the cover with an Arabian Facebuster and puts Knox in the camel clutch. Van Dam kicks the chair into Knox’s face but Test saves the pin. Sabu hits Air Sabu in the corner and Test falls onto the chair. Triple Jump Moonsault gets two. Another table is brought in and the Originals mess up the legdrop/Five Star combo through the table so only the Splash hits and gets the pin on Knox.

Rating: D+. Those of you that have read my stuff over the years know that I am by no means an ECW fan. That being said, Van Dam and Sabu are at almost no fault here. Test and Knox sucked the ever loving life out of this match and brought it through the floor. They were the perfect idea for heels in ECW but that doesn’t mean they were interesting in the slightest. I can’t stand those two and I’m sure they’ll be pushed even more in the future.

Kevin Thorn and Ariel pull a tarot card which reveals sexuality. Are they ever going to do anything with these two?

Here’s Striker again to talk about Sandman. He says that last week brain prevailed over brawn and that he’s smart enough to never go swimming with stingrays. This would be the day after Steve Irwin was killed by a stingray so the fans give Striker more heat than ever. Here’s Sandman so Striker runs away. Sandman writes SUX under Striker’s name. What biting commentary.

Balls Mahoney vs. Stevie Richards

Kevin Thorn comes to commentary for some reason and Ariel grinds on Joey a bit. Balls pounds him into the corner to start but Richards clotheslines him down for two. A neckbreaker gets the same and Richards takes over. A bad X-Factor gets two and it’s off to a chinlock. Balls slaps the mat which doesn’t count as a tap out for some reason and they’re back to their feet. Mahoney makes his comeback but has to stop to hit Thorn for some reason. A cane shot to the head of Mahoney gets the pin. Too short to rate but it was more about angle advancement than anything else.

Punk slaps Moore and calls him a poser. Yeah this is who they gave Punk for his first feud.

Big Show vs. D-Generation X

The world champion doesn’t even get an intro. Extreme Rules here, at least until Heyman comes out and says it’s a regular match. DX doesn’t have to tag here so they try to double team Show as much as possible. They get him down with punches but a double suplex is just a bad idea. Show takes over with his usual power offense, chopping both guys in the chest HARD.

DX tries to speed things up but the security guards pull the ropes down. HHH goes after them before they can beat up Shawn but Show pulls Shawn back into the ring for the one on one beating. HHH is down in the aisle and Shawn gets put in the bearhug. Show loads up the chokeslam but HHH makes the save. The Game fights him down and manages a kind of spinebuster as Shawn is back up. He dives onto the security guards but Show blocks the Pedigree. Hardcore Holly of all people comes in, and that’s a DQ.

Rating: D. This was like a preview of some sort but it was nothing interesting at all. For what was called the biggest match in ECW history, I was expecting more than a five minute match with Hardcore Holly coming in for the save. Nothing to see here as the match sucked for the most part, followed by a bad ending.

Shawn gets beaten down until HHH gets his sledgehammer for the save. DX stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. This was probably the worst show they’ve had in the few months this has been on. The main event was basically a preview for a PPV match involving Raw guys and the other featured match was slow and boring because the new ECW guys absolutely suck. Punk was only here for about 20 seconds so there was almost nothing to care about here. Awful show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

ECW on TNN
Date: November 5, 1999
Location: ECW Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 1,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

It’s the last show before November to Remember and I’m sure we’ll get some more matches thrown on here, or at least some more talked about. If I remember right a lot of the matches would often be added on the night of the show. I can’t believe that we’ve only got eleven months to go with this entire show. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip of a house show tag title match with Raven/Dreamer defending against the Impact Players. There was a catfight (duh) and Rhyno ran in to take down Dreamer, revealing himself as the mystery partner of the Impact Players. Raven tried to DDT him but Credible destroyed him with a Singapore cane.

The Players hit stereo piledrivers and covered but the lights went out and Sandman made the save, setting up the six man tag. After waiting for his song to play for a few minutes he came down and caned everyone in a fairly col sequence. Dreamer and Sandman have a beer together. This is Sandman’s return from WCW.

Opening sequence.

Joey runs down the PPV card.

The Baldies are in the ring and says there are two things they don’t have: hair and patience. They want Axl and Balls to prove who the real Hardcore Chair Swinging Freaks are.

Axl Rotten/Balls Mahoney vs. The Baldies

The guys with hair clear the ring until Skull (Big Vito) gets in Balls’ face. PN News and New Jack run in and make the save for the heel and then face side respectively. Carnage ensues and this wasn’t a real match. Angel staple guns New Jack in the eye and everyone panics.

After a break, Rotten/Mahoney vs. The Baldies is made for the PPV.

We run down the PPV card again.

The Baldies say they’re the new kings of the street instead of New Jack.

Little Guido vs. Spike Dudley vs. Super Crazy

Spike has a female fan in the crowd and Guido gets in her face. Then he stomps on her glasses until Spike goes off on him to get us going. Crazy gets involved and we take a break. Back with the Acid Drop being countered into a Fujiwara Armbar by Guido. Guido gets sent to the floor by Crazy so Spike can dive onto him. This is one of those matches that’s going so fast you can’t keep track of everything in it.

Everyone goes into the crowd for more brawling with Guido taking over again. They go to the ringside area inside the barricade before Spike puts Crazy into the crowd again and hits a rana. Back in finally and Spike dives into another Fujiwara Armbar but he makes the rope. The shoulder goes into the post and Big Sal sets up a table. Spike manages to Acid Drop him through said table as this is one of the biggest messes I’ve seen in years. Spike comes back in but walks into the Tomikaze (jumping Killswitch) for a quick pin.

This is elimination though so Crazy grabs a quick German suplex on Guido for two. Standing moonsault gets the same. Crazy does the ten punches in the corner and of course the crowd counts in Spanish. Guido counters a headscissors into a facejam out of the corner to take over. A top rope legdrop gets two and Guido is ticked off. A brainbuster is countered into a DDT for two for Crazy. Triple moonsault is broken up by Sal so the third one only hits knees. Crazy’s brainbuster gets two followed by a sitout powerbomb for the pin.

Rating: C-. I’m really not a fan of these wild fast paced matches. They’re going too fast to keep up with and while they’re fun, there’s too much going on at at once and it gets distracting. The stuff in the crowd was a nightmare because you couldn’t keep track of what was going on. Once they got in the ring and started wrestling it was a lot better, but this was still too much of a mess.

Van Dam isn’t worried about Taz because Taz is just jealous. When Taz was world champion, people were talking about the TV Champion. When did anyone tell Taz that one of his four minute title defenses were the match of the year? That’s painful because it’s true.

Simon Diamond has Dick Hertz with him.

Doring is sad because Lita is gone. They’re playing the Pulp Fiction music so we’re not going to see another match tonight are we? Doring says where he’ll be staying tonight if any women want to come make him feel better.

Fonzie tells Candido to bring it to Sabu.

Simon and Dick make fun of Buffalo.

Jerry Lynn is ready for his three way dance on Sunday.

The Baldies tell New Jack it could have been worse.

Simon warns people about his Big Dick.

Corino says his team will win and they’re not worried about Sandman.

Raven doesn’t want Sandman on his team.

The Impact Players want the titles.

Raven wants to hurt Credible.

Credible says his catchphrase.

Raven would rather let his mother die than lose to Justin.

Overall Rating: D. I get what they’re going for with these promo marathons, but they don’t make for good TV. Literally the last ten minutes of 45 they have to air are nothing but people talking. That isn’t interesting and it could have easily been used for a quick match or even two quick matches. At the end of the day, just wrestle. It’ll work most of the time.

Here’s November to Remember if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/07/26/november-to-remember-1999-another-six-man-main-event/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

ECW on TNN
Date: October 29, 2006
Location: Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie, New York
Attendance: 2,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

It’s another show before November to Remember and most of the card hasn’t been fleshed out at all. To be fair though they’re still getting the hang of this national TV thing and most of their audience (in theory) was watching Hardcore TV which is where a lot of the show was likely being hyped. I’m not sure what to expect from this show as I can’t find a card for it so this should be surprising at least. Let’s get to it.

After the theme song, Joel and Joey do their usual intro.

Taz vs. Sabu

That’s quite the opener. These two are the only grand slam winners in company history, if you count the FTW Title as a championship. They slug it out to start with Sabu taking a small advantage. We head to the floor and both guys get whipped into the barricade. Sabu sets up a table between the ring and the barricade and we take a break. Back with Sabu hitting a DDT on Taz on the ramp.

They fight on the ramp with Taz taking over with more right hands. Back inside the ring and Sabu dropkicks the knee out. The slingshot side kick gets two and both guys are down. There’s the camel clutch but Taz escapes pretty easily. Another kick is countered into a release German Tazplex to change the momentum. Taz goes up but gets caught in a rana off the top for two.

Fonzie helps to bring in a table and the fans are a lot more excited now. Now we get a chair too but the Triple Jump Moonsault is broken up. Sabu kicks the legs out from Taz when he’s about to swing a chair. A powerbomb is countered into an Alabama Slam through the table by Taz but Sabu grabs the rope. Taz goes up and misses a Swanton (Yes, Taz just tried that) so Sabu pelts him with a chair and drives him through a table. That gets a delayed two for Sabu and here’s another table. In a pretty simple ending, Sabu puts him on the table and hits an Arabian Facebuster off the top to drive Taz through the table for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not a terrible match here and I liked it better than their Barely Legal match. This is one of those matches where the history was there (not that ECW would ever give that history to you) so the fans were automatically going to care about it. The ending was a little lackluster, but Taz was on his way out so it made sense for him to go out on his back.

Post match the Impact Players come out but get chased off by Van Dam. Sabu and Van Dam get in a fight and Rob is punched into the Tazmission. It’s Taz vs. Van Dam at the PPV.

We get a clip from Hardcore TV with Lou E. Dangerously bringing back Mikey Whipwreck who got destroyed by Mike Awesome.

Lance Storm vs. Tommy Dreamer

Storm jumps Dreamer as he gets into the ring and Dreamer is in trouble. Dreamer comes back with an atomic low blow and knocks Storm to the floor. They head into the crowd for some shots with a chilled beverage. Back to ringside and Dreamer’s bad back gets suplexed onto the floor. It doesn’t really seem to matter as Dreamer backdrops him into the crowd again. He goes to the back and pulls out a ladder. Sure why not.

A middle rope elbow misses Storm completely and hits the ladder which had to freaking HURT. They head back in and Storm is in complete control. And scratch that as Dreamer whips him into the ladder and hits the Dreamer Driver for two. The girls get in and break it up with a catfight, allowing Raven to run in and DDT Dreamer so Storm can get the pin.

Rating: D. This can barely be classified as a wrestling match. It was a fight and a pretty sloppy one at that. Dreamer was incredibly popular in ECW, but he was never a ring general or even a sergeant. This didn’t work for the most part as Storm because a brawl isn’t his style at all. I didn’t like this one at all.

The Impact Players beat down Raven as well until Dreamer makes the save.

We recap the whole Dreamer/Raven vs. Impact Players feud.

Raven yells at Dreamer, saying that Tommy is a leech and a degenerate. For some reason Dreamer stands there and lets Raven beat him up before Tommy DDTs him and yells a lot.

Nova says he’s dedicating every match he wrestles to Chris Chetti, his injured partner.

Nova/David Cash vs. The Baldies

No match as Doring/Roadkill jump Nova while the Baldies beat up Cash. Balls Mahoney and Axl Rotten make the save for no apparent reason. They argue over hitting Lita with a chair but Jazz comes out and does it for them.

We get a bit of a dance party to Big Balls until Joey glares at Gertner. Joey previews next week’s show and talks about someone jumping from WCW next week.

Raven talks about all the misery he’s going to put Dreamer through and all the misery the Impact Players are going to go through as well. No matter what Justin does, he’ll never be as big as Raven.

Overall Rating: C-. These shows are reaching the point where we have coherent stories on them, which is a major upgrade. The main story is clearly Dreamer/Raven vs. the Impact Players, which would be most of the main event at November to Remember. The wrestling here was pretty bad but they were setting up the PPV which is something they needed to do. Also this show went by quickly so I can’t complain as much.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

ECW on TNN
Date: October 22, 1999
Location: Alario Sports Center, West Wago, Louisiana
Attendance: 2000
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

We’re getting closer to November To Remember and we’ve got a few matches set now. For one thing we have the world title match set as Awesome will defend against Tanaka. As for tonight’s show, it’s possible that we’ll see the TNN debut of Sabu. Gee I’m glad they didn’t wait awhile to bring in one of their legends or anything. Hopefully it’s a competitive match and they don’t bring in some old name that used to mean something to have him squash like the One Man Gang or something. Let’s get to it.

Joel is in the ring to open things up. Apparently he’s doing the ring announcing for the opener.

ECW World Title: Mike Awesome vs. New Jack

New Jack charges in with the weapons and Awesome stands there so he can get beaten on. Awesome fights back but gets bitten for his efforts. There’s a right hand to send the champion into the corner as that infernal song is still playing. Awesome misses a charge and we head to the floor. Jack puts Awesome against the railing and dives at him with a chair but it gets knocked back into Jack’s face.

Mike gets the chair now and takes over. Back into the ring and a top rope clothesline puts Jack down. Vader Bomb “misses” (Jack rolled the wrong way so it hit him anyway) and it’s staple gun time. A guitar shot to the head won’t put Awesome down but Jack jumps into a chair shot. Awesome throws him to the floor and through a table. Back in and the Awesome Splash gets the easy pin.

Rating: D+. If you take away the idea of wrestling from this match, it was pretty entertaining. Since New Jack is about as far from being a professional wrestler as I am, that’s not much of a stretch. This was just a way to pop the crowd before we get to the actual wrestling on the show.

Theme song.

Nova vs. Chris Candido

Gertner makes alcohol jokes about Tammy. They start fast with no one being able to get anything significant in. Candido finally hits him in the face to take over but walks into a backdrop. Flying forearm gets two. Nova is a guy that’s hard to keep up with because he’s not only fast but he does a lot of stuff that no one else did so it’s hard to call the moves. Before anything happens, Doring, Roadkill and Lita run in to beat on Nova for a DQ. This was really short.

Candido comes in to help Nova and we get a Lita vs. Sunny catfight, which I’m sure has been a fantasy for many over the years. After the ring is cleared and only Candido and Sytch are left, here come Storm and Dawn Marie for a distraction so Doring, Lita and Roadkill can come in from behind. Dawn paddles Tammy while Lita holds her. Dawn smacks Lita because she can.

With the ring cleared (again), Dawn calls out Francine who comes out with Dreamer. Storm suggests Dreamer can’t sleep with Francine and it’s on, but Justin runs in to double team Dreamer. Here’s Raven who comes in and then turns his back on the Impact Players. It’s about to be another double team but Dreamer makes the save. Raven DDTs Dreamer because he can.

Post break Dreamer is up and calls out Raven. They square off…..and we go to a break.

Rhyno vs. David Kash

Rhyno jumps him and the beatdown begins quickly. Kash hits a dropkick but gets Gored for two. Piledriver works a bit better and gets the pin for Rhyno. This wasn’t even a minute.

Corino gets on the mic post match and says he wants Sabu out here right now to face Rhyno.

Rhyno vs. Sabu

Sabu beats up Rhyno’s posse before the match as the fans are just NUTS for Sabu. Rhyno takes over and we take a quick break. Back with Sabu being sent to the floor so the cronies can beat him up. Back in the ring and Sabu gets powerbombed off a rana attempt for two. Rhyno throws him to the floor and tries a dive but takes out the other guys instead. The other guys/cronies/the posse are Steve Corino and Jack Victory in case that wasn’t clear.

Sabu puts him in the crowd and hits a HUGE dive to take Rhyno out. Back at ringside and Sabu pelts the chair to put Rhyno down. Fonzie is out here now. There’s a table set up between the ring and the barricade like a platform. Sabu ranas Rhyno off the top and back inside for two as Corino makes the save. Fonzie crotches Corino and Steve takes a rana as well. Sabu goes to put Corino through the table but Rhyno Gores him down.

Instead of covering he grabs a chair and charges but Sabu kicks it into his face for two. The triple jump moonsault is broken up but Sabu takes out Victory anyway. There’s a camel clutch and Rhyno is in trouble. Corino makes the save AGAIN but gets taken out by Fonzie. FONZIE HITS A SLINGSHOT SPLASH!!! That was kind of awesome. Rhyno gets put on the table and Sabu hits a triple jump Arabian Facebuster through Rhyno and through the table to put both guys down.

The fans are, as usual, going insane for Sabu. Joey talks about how you’ll NEVER see Sabu on Raw or Nitro, both of which he’d appear on (Nitro he already had been on but you get the idea). There’s a table in the ring now but Sabu has to take out Victory first. That doesn’t change much as Sabu drives Rhyno through the table for two to shock Joey. Facejam onto the chair gets two. Sabu sets for something off the top on Rhyno but Corino covers him for protection. That’s really stupid to do against Sabu as he jumps on both of them. Arabian Facebuster and the Triple Jump Moonsault finally get the pin.

Rating: C. It was a mess but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy it. Sabu is very much a microcosm of ECW: when he’s on he’s good, but when he’s off, OH MAN is he off. The interference got old fast here too. Also, why have Sabu win? Give Rhyno a cheap victory to further his monster push. Sabu is going to be incredibly popular no matter what, so why not?

A three minute music video of what happened in the show ends it. How pointless is that? Ok Sunny bent over in a thong with her face in Lita’s crotch while Dawn Marie spanks her isn’t but the rest is.

Overall Rating: A+. It has Sunny bent over in a thong with her face in Lita’s crotch while Dawn Marie spanks her. What kind of a grade do you think I’m going to give this?

The show is still a mess but the long main event with a big name helped. November to Remember is still mostly unannounced but they’ve got a few weeks left. The show was just ok this week.

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ECW on Sci-Fi
Date: August 8, 2006
Location: Bridgestone Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

This is I think the ninth episode and thankfully for the sake of WWE, the show is out of ECW country this week. The main event is Angle vs. Sabu in a match that has some historical significance which we’ll get to at the end of this. Other than that there isn’t much to talk about but Summerslam is coming up so you know there’s going to be talk about the non-ECW matches from that show right? Let’s get to it.

After a clip from last week with the opening tag, we’re ready to go.

Mike Knox vs. Tommy Dreamer

Knox jumps Dreamer as he’s getting in and we’re going fast. He tries a backdrop but Dreamer hits a bad neckbreaker to take over. Dreamer hits a Cactus Clothesline to put both guys outside. Knox goes into the steps and let’s head back inside. Middle rope elbow gets two for Dreamer and here’s Heyman. Dreamer hits the DDT but the security guards come in and take out Tommy. Knox hits a DDT for the quick pin.

Heyman and the guards set for a double beatdown but Sandman comes in for the save and we take a break.

Back with Heyman telling Sandman that Heyman gets what’s wrong. It’s about Dreamer getting attacked right? Dreamer was going to get another match with someone (presumably the tag match from last week) but instead Sandman gets to go it alone. Oh and it’s regular rules so no cane.

Test/Mike Knox vs. Sandman

I mean, what would we do without a Test appearance right? As Dreamer is on his way to the back, Test kicks his head off in a nice heelish move. Sandman tries to use the cane anyway but misses Knox. Test beats him down and the double teaming begins. The heels beat on him for awhile until Test missses a charge in the corner. Sandman dropkicks Knox and then grabs the cane for the quick DQ. This was less than nothing.

Sandman canes them both and leaves.

Video on Sabu.

We see Sabu attacking Big Show the last two weeks, which is why Sabu is in a #1 contenders match with Angle tonight.

Sabu says he’ll win. Insert rage about Sabu talking here.

Balls Mahoney loves ECW and has cuts in his head.

There’s a full moon, which of course leads to….

Kevin Thorn vs. Al Snow

DANG those things on Ariel are big. She hangs upside down on the ropes during the entrance. Thankfully Joey is there to pound it into our heads that they follow Vampirism. Snow jumps him to start and gets a very quick one. Thorn catches him and hits a very bad gutbuster as he works on the ribs. Snow fights back a bit but gets caught by the elevated Stunner. Razor’s Edge ends this squash.

Video on Angle.

Angle says that Sabu will lose tonight, because it’s suicide to come into the ring with him.

Rene Dupree is coming. Oh geez.

Here’s Big Show for a chat. Show knows that he’s the best ECW Champion ever. He doesn’t represent the blood and guts that usually are associated with the title. Instead he’s bringing some class to the belt. Angle will be crushed like crackers in soup and Sabu would be suicidal if he comes after the title. No one can beat him apparently.

We get a clip from last week with Punk debuting.

Punk says he was welcomed into the ECW family and he thanks the fans for that reception. All the years of training have paid off but now it’s about the future. He’ll be in the ring again next week.

Kurt Angle vs. Sabu

Main event and #1 contender match. Sabu charges straight at him which gets him nowhere at all. Angle takes Sabu down and slaps him around a little bit. He goes after the leg but Sabu gets a rope. The idea here is that Sabu has to be careful while Angle is looking for an opening. Sabu avoids a charge and Angle’s shoulder goes into the post. Sabu sends him to the floor and we take a break. Back with Sabu in a rear chinlock. The winner gets the title match at Summerslam.

Sabu fights up and hits a springboard tornado DDT for two. Angle is in a little trouble but he snaps off an overhead belly to belly to take over. Off to the grapevined chinlock which doesn’t last long. Sabu hits a springboard leg lariat and a slingshot legdrop for two. Let lariat gets the same. The American hits rolling Germans on the Arabian and loudly calls the flip over spot on the last one.

There go the straps but Sabu counteres the Slam. Sabu hits some springboard attacks for two. Camel clutch goes on but Angle reverses into the ankle lock. Sabu rolls through and the counter sends Angle out to the floor. A flip dive almost totally misses and both guys are down on the floor. Angle AGAIN can be heard talking to Sabu. This is getting ridiculous. Back in a spinning splash off the top gets two for Sabu. Angle counters an arm hold into the ankle lock but here’s RVD for the DQ.

Rating: B-. I was getting into this as Sabu having to go crazy to hold off Angle was a nice idea. The key to Sabu is to have someone in there with him that can keep him sane and the match works WAY better. This was way better than I was expecting and it’s always nice to have a match exceed yoru expectations, especially when you’re expecting a mess with Sabu.

Rob attacks both guys and stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. I liked last week’s show better but this certainly wasn’t bad. Rob returning is a good thing because the historical significance I was talking about earlier is that Angle would never have another WWE match on TV. After this he would be gone within a week and would be in TNA in less than two months. Rob needed to come back and they would soon start changing the way ECW looked. Decent show but nothing great.

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