It’s the last night in Bethlehem, meaning we’re heading for New York next week. Tonight Kurt Angle has scheduled a series of title matches with only the World Title not being on the line. However, there will be a twenty man battle royal with the winner getting a World Title shot at some point in the future. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video about how so many titles are on the line this week. Most of them were last week as well but it’s nice to see matches that matter twice in a row.

Here’s Kurt Angle to declare this the Championship Showcase, meaning every match has championship ramifications. He runs down the card before asking Willow to come out here. Kurt says Jeff Hardy became Willow because of the dark place that Dixie Carter had put him in. Now it’s just Kurt Angle, and Kurt needs the most competitive wrestler in the world, and that’s Jeff Hardy. Kurt isn’t asking Willow to go away forever, but just for tonight.

Austin Aries says he’ll win the X-Division Title tonight.

Tag Team Titles: Wolves vs. Bram/Magnus

The Wolves are defending and it’s Davey vs. Magnus to get things going. A rolling enziguri puts Magnus down and the champions double team him in the corner. Bram comes in as well and gets kicked down just as quickly. It’s off to Bram legally but Davey rams him head first into Eddie ala the British Bulldogs. Magnus gets in a cheap shot from the apron to take over before getting Eddie off the apron so there’s no one for Davey to tag. The challengers take over and Magnus avoids a quick enziguri.

Another kick to the head connects and Bram can’t make a fast enough save. Edwards comes in with fast chops to cleans house before a top rope hurricanrana gets two on Bram. The Wolves sends the Brits to the floor for a double suicide dive. Back in and Davey misses the top rope double stomp but escapes a powerbomb into a backslide. The legal Eddie runs in and grabs Bram’s legs in a rollup for the pin at 7:17.

Rating: C. Nice match here but again, the Wolves need challengers to be built up to challenge them, not for them to beat week in and week out. They don’t need to prove how awesome they are and the division is already weak enough. It was entertaining stuff though and I’m fine with the Wolves like this. Just keep them away from fighting each other for awhile.

Bobby Roode is fired up.

Speaking of Roode, here he is in the arena. He talks about wanting something so much that you need it. For months, Dixie Carter made him sit at home and then MVP did the same. MVP sees him as a threat, but now this threat is in the middle of the ring. He wants to get his hands on MVP and doesn’t care about a doctor’s note. If MVP isn’t here by a count of ten, Roode is coming to the back and ripping MVP apart.

MVP’s music hits at about five and he comes out in a wheelchair and says Roode has made his knee injury even worse. It’s swollen so big that he can’t even get an MRI. He’s so upset that he won’t stand for this. Roode comes up the ramp anyway but has to dispatch Kenny King. MVP is sent down to the ring but King nails Roode with a chair. Eric Young comes out for the save but Lashley runs out to spear him down.

James Storm sits down with Sanada in the back and says Sanada will disgrace Japan and the Great Muta if he loses the title. Storm says Muta controls Sanada through the title, but Storm likes what he sees in Sanada. Interesting indeed.

We see the Angle and Willow segment again.

Angle says he thinks he got to Hardy, and that was his goal.

X-Divison Title: Sanada vs. Austin Aries

Sanada is defending and quickly spins out of a wristlock into a headlock on the mat but Aries pops right out of it. A dropkick nails Aries but he’s right on his feet again for a standoff. They head to the mat for the Last Chancery from Aries but Sanada is quickly in the ropes. Sanada puts on a rolling cradle for two and Aries is dizzy. A running clothesline puts him on the floor and but he slides in before Sanada can dive. Back in and Aries shoves him off the top to break up a springboard attempt, allowing him to hit a top rope ax handle to the floor.

Back in and Aries goes up, only to get dropkicked out of the air. Sanada sends him to the floor for a running dive off the apron but Aries counters the tiger suplex. The running dropkick in the corner sets up the brainbuster but Sanada flips out and gets the tiger suplex for two. The moonsault connects for two but an Aries avoids a second. The brainbuster gets two and the 450 gives Aries the pin at 8:26.

Rating: B. The match was awesome, but this basically makes Sanada’s entire reign totally pointless. It’s going to hurt the title even more when the belt is vacated and we have to have yet another tournament for the title and no big name enters it because there’s no reason to care about the X-Division Title until next July. Option C might be the worst thing ever for the division.

Ray doesn’t want to talk about Rhino and we go to a break very abruptly. We get the full version of the interview after we get back, with Ray shouting at the interviewer about how he’s going to talk to Rhino face to face.

Ethan Carter III says Rhino is going to reveal the real Bully.

Bully comes out to the ring and says when he was starting out, Bam Bam Bigelow gave him some advice: by the time he was established, he could count the number of true friends he had on one hand. That brings Ray to Rhino, who he wants out here right now, face to face. He gets Rhino but also gets Spud and Ethan Carter III. Bully demands answers from Rhino but Rhino says this is about the two of them. When Rhino was watching Team 3D being announced for the Hall of Fame, Rhino realized that Bully was a con man.

Ray has conned Paul Heyman and Dixie Carter. Bully says that’s a cop out and says Rhino has been brainwashed. This is just jealousy and Ray is in the Hall of Fame because the people say he should be. Rhino is responsible for his own career and is the only reason he got fired from WWE and TNA. He was hardcore at one point but now he’s just a coward. Ethan says he paid off Rhino because Rhino needs the money. Ray says he’s going to rip Carter apart but gets Gored. The beatdown ensues but Tommy Dreamer makes the save with a kendo stick. You know what the chant is.

The Beautiful People complain about how their flirting didn’t get them anywhere. Angelina says she’s going to win the title back tonight.

Knux says the Menagerie should win tonight because they’re tailor made for a battle royal.

Knockouts Title: Angelina Love vs. Gail Kim vs. Brittany vs. Madison Rayne

Gail is defending. Brittany jumps Madison on the way to the ring but Gail comes out for the save. Things settle down with Gail faceplanting Madison but Angelina pulls the champion out to the floor. Angelina and Brittany double team Madison with Love playing on Brittany’s inexperience to get a quick near fall. Madison hits a kind of suplex jawbreaker to put Brittany down but walks into the Botox Injection from Angelina. Eat Defeat to Love is enough to retain Gail’s title at 5:35.

Rating: D+. I can’t count how many times I’ve seen a match that was almost identical to this one between the Knockouts. They’ve been doing the exact same kind of multi girl matches for years now and, just like the people in them, they’re only slightly different than the last one. These get old and pretty easy to predict very fast.

Austin Aries says he always seems to have the X-Division Title around this time of the year. The title is the key for a title shot and everyone thinks he’s going to cash the title in for a title shot in New York City but he likes to mix things up. He says the division is important again.

Video on Destination X, three weeks from tonight.

Bobby Roode doesn’t care about MVP and the trio, but he’ll be back for them later.

MVP talks about how Lashley is a franchise player. We see Lashley working out wearing the title belt.

Battle Royal

Knux, Crazy Steve, The Freak, Bobby Roode, Eric Young, Ethan Carter III, Rockstar Spud, Manik, DJZ, Bram, Sanada, Magnus, Jesse Godderz, Bully Ray, Jeff Hardy, Mr. Anderson, Kenny King, Gunner, James Storm, Tigre Uno

The winner gets a title shot next week. Roode is now in long tights. Hardy comes out as Jeff Hardy for the first time in a few months. I think I’ve got everyone in the match but it’s always hard to tell. Jesse quickly dropkicks Crazy Steve out for the first elimination but the Freak puts him out a few seconds later. DJZ goes after the two remaining members of the Menagerie and is quickly eliminated. Bram and Magnus put the Freak out and Knux misses a big boot, allowing them to dump him as well. Storm knocks Hardy to the apron and bites Hardy’s fingers but can’t get an elimination.

Bram forearms Tigre Uno out as the ring is clearing a bit. Sanada is tossed as well before Roode clotheslines Magnus to the floor. Storm does the same to Anderson and tosses Gunner as well. Hardy gets rid of Bram, bringing out Abyss to hammer Bram to the back. Kenny King misses a charge at Manik and is able to eliminate him from the apron. Roode and Storm have the required showdown as we go to a break.

Back with Roode dumping Storm, getting us down to a final group of Spud, Carter, Ray, Young, King, Hardy and Roode. Spud tries to chop Ray and gets grabbed low for his efforts.
Ray knocks out Spud and Ethan but eliminates himself in the process. Down to four now. Young is down in the corner as Roode spinebusts King, only to have MVP get in a cheap shot to Bobby with his crutch for an elimination.

Young dumps King and we’re down to Hardy vs. Eric. They shake hands and we’re ready to go. A quick belly to belly attempt sends Hardy to the apron but he comes back in with a jawbreaker. Young is sent over the corner for a Flair Flip so of course he struts along the apron. Hardy is nice enough to not nail him but a dropkick knocks Young out for the at 16:00.

Rating: C+. This was a decent enough battle royal as they kept things moving fast enough that it didn’t get boring. Hardy winning the title shot was pretty obvious the second his music hit but he’s one of the best choices. I have no idea where Samoa Joe was, but I’m assuming this is setting up Joe vs. Angle down the line.

Jeff says he won, bad hair and all. He’s the next World Champion and is doing it for the creatures. Lashley comes out and holds up the belt to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I actually liked tonight’s show for the most part, but the X-Division stuff gets on my nerves. It’s such a waste of potential for the division and comes off too much like Money in the Bank. Other than that though we had two good matches and a decent enough battle royal to set up a big main event next week. The show did its job and wasn’t terrible so it works well enough for me.

Results
Wolves b. Bram/Magnus – Rollup to Bram
Austin Aries b. Sanada – 450 Splash
Gail Kim b. Madison Rayne, Angelina Love and Brittany – Eat Defeat to Love
Jeff Hardy won a battle royal last eliminating Eric Young

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Survivor Series at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

These things are back again with another random tag partners competition. It’s the same format as the first in the series: take four random wrestlers and put them in a tag match, then have the winners go into a gauntlet battle royal. The winner gets a check for $100,000. I wouldn’t mind if they used money as a motivating factor in wrestling more often. Let’s get to it.

As usual, we open with a package of clips from the show we’re about to see.

Jeremy Borash and Christy Hemme explain the concept for the night. They also do the drawing for the first match, which they’ll be doing before every tag match tonight.

Gunner/Chris Sabin vs. British Invasion

It’s Magnus/Doug Williams, which should tell you a thing or two about how this show is going to go. This is one of Sabin’s final appearances as he’s gone from the company by the time this show airs. Doug and Sabin get things going with the Englishman taking him down by the arm. The announcers are already in their own little world as Williams hangs onto the arm even though a monkey flip. Sabin is sent to the floor for a chase and eats a European uppercut back inside.

Off to Gunner for some nice applause and one off a shoulder block. The tag brings in Magnus to a mixed reaction and the showdown with Gunner. Well it would be a showdown if this were on regular TNA TV and Magnus were still World Champion but there’s only so much for me to work with on this show. A headlock takes Gunner down to the mat but he fights back with a fall away slam for two.

Back to Sabin who gets caught in a double neckbreaker for two. The announcers are talking about tag team wrestling for a change. Granted it’s about Taz’s career but at least they’re getting closer than they were earlier when they talked about wrestling polar bears. A sunset flip from Douglas gets two on Gunner but it’s quickly back to Sabin. Chris chokes Douglas with a rope from his wrist to get some cheating in there but the fans cheer Douglas back to his feet.

Gunner comes in again but charges into a boot in the corner, allowing Williams to come off the middle rope with a European uppercut. Taz’s line during that sequence: “Calculus 202. That was my thing.” He’s talking about math, not the uppercut in case you’re looking for a double meaning or a metaphor there. Everything breaks down and Gunner puts Magnus in the Gun Rack but Sabin tags himself in and gets two on Magnus. Sabin accidentally hits his partner, setting up the snapmare into the top rope elbow from Magnus for the pin to advance.

Rating: C. This was your typical One Night Only match: the wrestling wasn’t bad but the lack of a strong story hurts it. It’s not bad or anything and there was a basic story of having an experienced team against a makeshift team but this was much more for the live crowd than the PPV audience.

The British Invasion both say they’ll win the gauntlet for the money later tonight. Magnus emphasizes that the reunion was indeed for one night only but there are no hard feelings.

Bad Influence says they’ll both carry their partners and then win the gauntlet. The Bro Mans come in and promise they’ll win but Bad Influence says the Bro Mans might not be together tonight. Robbie seems a little more aware of what’s going on tonight. This turns into a discussion of hair gel.

Robbie E./Christopher Daniels vs. Samoa Joe/Bad Bones

By the powers, what a coincidence. And right after they were talking too! Bad Bones is the German wrestler that Joe beat up in like 90 seconds a few weeks back. He looks like a lot like A-Train if he was about six inches shorter and not covered with hair. Joe starts with Daniels as the announcers debate leader boards vs. a list of winners. Daniels doesn’t break clean in the corner but his forearms to the back have almost no effect at all. Joe runs him over and hammers away in the corner to set up the Facewash.

Daniels bails to the floor for a meeting with Robbie as the fans quiet down. Back in and E is tagged in before Joe tags him in the jaw with right hands. Off to Bones for a nice high collar suplex and two. Some running forearms and a running knee to the chest ala Daniel Bryan drop Daniels with ease. E tries to help his partner but Bones double clotheslines them down as well. Robbie trips Bones up from the floor and comes in legally to hammer away in the corner.

We hit the chinlock and the fans are already cheering for Bones. E misses a charge in the corner though and the hot tag brings in Joe to face Daniels. The big boot and backsplash get two on Christopher and it’s off to a cross armbreaker. Robbie makes the save but gets speared down by Bones. Joe Muscle Busts Daniels for the pin to advance.

Rating: C. I have a feeling we’ll be seeing that rating a lot tonight. There’s only so much to do in a quick match like this with a basic story of power vs. speed with four guys that have a limited history together. Not a bad match or anything but it was just ten minutes of four guys doing moves to each other with Joe and Bones not really breaking a sweat.

Gunner says the loss wasn’t his fault.

British Invasion says the same thing they said after their match.

Samuel Shaw says he only trusts himself.

We do another draw and there are about twenty fewer pieces of paper in the tumbler.

Rockstar Spud/Bully Ray vs. Mr. Anderson/Austin Aries

This has potential. Spud says he’ll be team captain no matter who his partner is and then Bully is announced for a funny moment. Ray and Spud stare each other down. That goes badly for Spud so he gets a chair to stand on. He talks about being chief of staff…..before quickly agreeing that Ray is captain tonight. The fans chant for Aries but switch to WE WANT SPUD. They get what they ask for but the tag hurts Spud’s hand.

Aries easily takes him down so Bully gives him a huge pep talk and starts a SPUD chant. The Rockstar gets in Aries’ face and slaps him, only to be dropped by a left hand. Ray offers another tag but Spud is scared of the pain so it’s another pep talk. This time Aries takes him down with a clothesline and it’s off to Anderson to take over in the corner. All four get in and Spud starts to dance. Ray walks to the corner and facepalms, allowing Aries and Anderson to double team Spud.

Bully realizes he’s doing this on his own and Spud gets knocked down again. Ray yells at him and gets elbowed in the back of the head by Aries, knocking him face first into….uh….a certain place on Spud. This just makes Ray even angrier so he breaks out of a Mic Check and kicks Anderson in the face. Spud does Ray’s pose so Ray pulls him to the corner by the ear and hits a big elbow drop for two on Anderson. Ray to Hebner: “You know what? You count too slow!”

He yells at Hebner in the corner but Earl gets right in Ray’s face to take him into the other corner. Now it’s back to Spud. Taz: “WHY???” Spud drops the same elbow for two and gets in Hebner’s face so Earl slams him down to give Aries a two count. Anderson hits the neckbreaker on the now legal Bully and it’s off to Aries who dropkicks Ray to the floor. A dropkick from the top to the floor and a regular missile dropkick get two for Aries but Ray slams him down and tells Spud to go up top.

Ray: “WHAT’S UP???” Spud: “I’M UP!” The headbutt connects but Ray knocks Spud down when he slaps him in the chest before GET THE TABLES. Spud falls down trying to pull the table out and Ray is disgusted. “GET THE TABLE IN ALREADY!” Anderson comes over and puts his arm around Ray as Spud is still dealing with the table.

Aries is about to go up for What’s Up but Hebner won’t let him. Spud tries a sneak attack on Anderson but is thrown into Ray’s crotch for his efforts. Ray: “YOU SOB!” The fans rightfully think this is awesome and there’s the running corner dropkick from Aries. He loads up the brainbuster but Spud rolls Aries up and pulls the trunks halfway off for the pin. The look of shock on Ray’s face is priceless.

Rating: A+. This was the funniest match I’ve seen in years and maybe even ever. They kept the joke going the entire time and had a WAY more entertaining match than they would have had if they played it straight. This is something WWE needs to learn from. Rather than just having a guy be designated as a comedy guy and having him do strange things while the commentators tell you it’s funny, this was four guys who can be funny BEING FUNNY.

Instead of just doing the same bits over and over again (like Young stripping or the Cobra), they did different stuff that we hadn’t seen before and had a very funny match as a result. Comedy can be done, but let these funny people come up with it themselves rather than having them perform something a writer came up with. If they were good enough actors/performers to do what a writer came up with, they would be in Hollywood making way more money.

This was a blast and a good lesson in how to do comedy wrestling. The tagline One Night Only applies here too: if they did this every week on TV it would stop being anywhere near as funny in like the third week. Do it every now and then instead of the same bits every week and it’ll work far better.

The following two matches are listed in different orders on various sites. This is the order they aired in on the version I have and I don’t think it makes any real difference.

Wolves vs. Beer Money

Eh sometimes it’s better to screw believability and just let two awesome teams have a match. Roode vs. Richards to get things going with a nice technical wrestling sequence. Bobby gets the better of it and cranks on a headlock but Edwards gets a blind tag and dropkicks Roode in the side of the head for two. Off to Storm who gets dropkicked down, allowing the Wolves to take over on the arm. Storm hadn’t turned heel when this was taped so the fans are way into him.

Back to Roode who gets headbutted into the corner and then forearmed in the face by Richards. Storm gets caught in the same corner and kicked down, giving us the gay sex position spot. Back up and Storm kicks the heck out of Richards from the apron and Beer Money takes over. A double back elbow gets two on Davey and we hit a chinlock with Storm’s knee in his back. In one of the few amusing bits of commentary all night, Tenay asks Taz about his time teaming with Raven. Taz: “What about Raven?” They also get into a discussion of how Taz is always commentating with guys named Mike.

Roode comes back in for a chinlock of his own but Davey easily fights up. We get one of the stupidest spots I’ve ever seen as Richards throws Roode to Storm, who catches Bobby in a front facelock for no apparent reason. Then Davey kicks Storm in the face, causing Storm to DDT Roode. Spots like that where they might as well draw you a picture that says “YEAH, WE PLANNED THIS BEFOREHAND” drive me crazy.

Davey finally makes the hot tag to Edwards who cleans house with chops in the corner. The reverse tornado DDT from Storm is countered into the over the shoulder Stunner for two. An enziguri into a German from Davey gets two on Storm with Roode making the save. Everything breaks down and Davey takes the Backstabber from James and a spinebuster from Bobby. Beer Money hits the double suplex and SHOUT THEIR NAMES. Edwards fights out of DWI though and Richards comes back in with a missile dropkick. Beer Money is sent to the floor for a double dive, followed by the top rope double stomp to Storm for the pin.

Rating: B. That’s probably a stretch. The match was good but it certainly wasn’t as great as you would expect from these teams. It made me think of the Hart Foundation vs. the Brainbusters back in 1989. It sounds amazing on paper but when you see it live it’s just a good but not really memorable match. Also it would have been a better choice to put Roode and Storm in the battle royal as they’re far more likely to win than either of the Wolves.

They shake hands post match.

Spud celebrates his win in the back and says he was the team captain. Ray comes in and Spud immediately shakes his hand and asks how the captain is doing. Ray: “YOUR HEAD WAS IN MY NUTS FOR HALF OF THE MATCH! IF YOU EVER DO THAT AGAIN…..I’LL GIVE YOU A BIG OLD KISS BECAUSE WE WON!” Ray kisses Spud on the cheek and gives him a huge hug.

Aries says he’s speechless.

Kazarian/Curry Man vs. Eric Young/Ethan Carter III

For those of you that don’t remember, Curry Man is a masked man in red and yellow with a plate of curry on his head, based on an ad for curry in India. He’s usually played by Christopher Daniels and I believe he is here as well, even though you can see some hair sticking out of the back of the mask. It’s a brawl to start with Young and Curry Man being left alone in the ring. Curry and Young hug each other before slugging it out. They hug again then trade about six standing switches before hugging a third time.

Kaz gets sick of it and suggests a mid match change: Young and Curry Man team against Kaz and Carter. Apparently it’s going to be allowed but Eric and Curry Man stay on the apron. Carter rolls up Kaz for two but Eric makes the save, despite that not even being his original partner. The referee makes them go back to the original partners and more confusion ensues.

Carter finally chokes Curry Man to take over and a slam gets two. Young comes in to save Curry Man and gets yelled at by Ethan. “YOU’RE MY PARTNER!” Eric: “I KNOW IT SUCKS!” A clothesline puts Curry Man down for two and we hit the chinlock. Back up and it’s a double clothesline to put both guys down. Tags bring in Eric and Kaz and we get a crisscross. Young takes over with a flying forearm and a belly to belly as everything breaks down. Carter and Curry Man fight to the floor as Young rolls up Kaz for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not really even a match but it was one of the more bearable Eric Young comedy affairs that I can remember seeing. At least this time the story made sense and it wasn’t the same annoying Young stuff over and over again. It’s also a nice take on the random pairings idea which makes this easier to sit through.

Carter lays out Eric postmatch.

The Wolves are more excited about beating Beer Money than going to the gauntlet.

Abyss/Samuel Shaw vs. Zema Ion/Jesse Godderz

Godderz poses for Shaw to start but Abyss tags himself in to scare Jesse to death. Ion comes in and shouts BOOM a lot, much to Abyss’ annoyances. A cross body has no effect whatsoever and Abyss slams him down with one arm. About twenty chops from Ion have about the same effect and Abyss runs him over with a clothesline.

Off to Shaw who the fans call creepy. Back to Jesse who elbows Shaw in the face but gets slammed down with ease. Abyss tags himself back in to a nice reaction and cleans house on Godderz. Samuel turns his back on Abyss but gets dragged back into the ring. Godderz and Ion take over with some double teaming and a jawbreaker staggers Shaw. He takes time to go stare at Christy though, allowing Ion to hit a flip dive for two.

Zema misses a middle rope moonsault and it’s back to Abyss for some house cleaning. Jesse actually stops him with a clothesline but Shaw is busy going after Christy. He gets her in the corner and the referee just lets this happen, only to have Abyss make the save. Christy bails so Shaw hammers on his partner. That goes as well as you would expect but the Bro Mans actually knock Abyss to the floor. Shaw grabs the standing choke on Godderz for the submission a few seconds later.

Rating: D+. Nothing much to see here but at least they didn’t go for a third comedy match out of six. Shaw and Christy have a limited shelf life and hopefully it’s done after the latest gimmick match between Shaw and Anderson. Jesse and Ion were just there to bounce off Abyss and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Ethan Carter III takes credit for the win. Spud and Magnus (on the phone) come up and say that Dixie is proud. Magnus implies that they should let him win the gauntlet but after he leaves, Carter suggests that he should win. Spud thinks he might be the winner.

Lei’D Tapa/Gail Kim/Alpha Female vs. Velvet Sky/Madison Rayne/ODB

Just a filler here in an elimination match. Tapa imitates Velvet’s entrance to a ton of booing but Velvet calms the people down by doing it again. Sky charges at Tapa but is lifted in the air for a choke. Off to Gail for a clothesline but she gets caught by Madison’s mat humper. Gail spanks Tapa for some reason and yells at her for not having her back. The announcers talk about having spotted dick at lunch today and the match just keeps going.

Alpha comes in for a slam and some forearms to Madison’s chest. She misses a bad looking splash though and it’s back to Velvet who finally knocks Alpha down. Madison and Gail fight to the floor as Velvet bulldogs Alpha down. Chris Sabin comes out to distract the referee though and gets in an argument with Velvet. Sky low bridges him to the floor, kicks Alpha in the head and hits In Yo Face for the elimination.

Gail rolls Velvet up for a fast pin but the referee is with Sabin and misses Madison spearing Gail down. Tapa runs Madison over for an easy pin and we’re down to Gail/Tapa vs. ODB. The numbers game quickly catch up to her but Gail wants to get the glory. Tapa gets tired of it and shoves Gail into a rollup to get us down to one on one. Gail nails Tapa and ODB hits the Bam for the final pin.

Rating: D. There was no reason at all for this to be elimination rules. There were a few too many things going on here but they still could have wrapped the whole thing up in a single fall. It also doesn’t help that all of these stories have already been wrapped up two months before this show aired.

Gauntlet Battle Royal

Basically it’s a Royal Rumble with two minute intervals and the winner getting $100,000. We start with Davey vs. Eddie because that’s how random draws work. Feeling out process to start until the start slugging it out with strikes. Davey gets the better of it with his kicks until Samuel Shaw is in at #3. The Wolves actually keep fighting until Shawn breaks it up and chokes Edwards in the corner.

Edwards comes back with some chops and the Wolves start double teaming. Davey sends Shaw into a running knee to the face but here’s Rockstar Spud at #4. His strategy: kick Shaw low and wrap himself around the ropes for dear life. The Wolves lock eyes onto Spud before splitting up and stomping on both Spud and Shaw. Spud tries to eliminate Shaw by himself as the Wolves just chuckle from the corner. Shaw comes back with a crotch claw and here’s Douglas Williams at #5.

Spud keeps switching ropes to hold onto as we get into the standard battle royal formula of people pairing off and brawling against the ropes without trying to eliminate each other. The Wolves drop Douglas with a double back elbow as Spud is running out of places to hide. Abyss is in at #6 as these times are very suspect. He clotheslines everyone in sight, which doesn’t include Spud who has disappeared. Abyss easily tosses out Edwards and Davey suffers the same fate about fifteen seconds later. There goes Williams and we’re down to Abyss and Shaw on their feet. There’s a Black Hole Slam to set up the elimination as Spud tries to sneak up on Abyss. The monster chokes him up against the ropes as Bully Ray is in at #7.

Spud tries to interfere again but gets thrown over. He hangs on and skins the cat though, only to fall down when trying a double clothesline. Ray and Abyss have the real fight with Abyss nailing the chokeslam. Ray is right back up though as Spud shakes the ropes like the Warrior. A cross body has no effect either but here’s Eric Young at #8 to distract from Spud’s ineptness.

Eric hammers away on everyone in sight but Ray fights back. The Bully scares Spud to the floor but under the bottom rope so everyone is still in. Ray yells at Spud for not helping him get rid of Eric and here’s Ethan Carter III at #9. Eric goes right for him but Spud gets in a few shots from behind to give Ethan control. Spud tries to jump Bully again and gets shouted down into the corner. The five guys in the ring don’t do much else until Bad Bones comes in at #10.

Bones slugs away at everyone in sight which fits his brawling style. Again this goes nowhere until Samoa Joe is in at #11. Much like everyone else, Joe hammers away on everyone in sight upon entering the ring. A nice suplex puts Carter down before Joe settles in on Bad Bones. That doesn’t last long as Joe easily backdrops Bones out and it’s off to Joe vs. Bully. Spud actually eliminates Bully on his own but Joe wacks Spud in the head to put him on the mat.

Magnus comes out to give us a final grouping of Magnus, Joe, Spud, Abyss, Carter and Young. Joe and Magnus immediately go at it with Joe getting the early advantage but getting low bridged out to the floor to get us down to five. Abyss gets gang eliminated but Spud charges at Young and flies over the ropes to the floor. Eric dropkicks both Carter and Magnus down as things speed up. He gets both of them up for something resembling a double Death Valley Driver but gets crotched on the top and punched out by Magnus. Carter uses the distraction to eliminate Magnus for the win.

Rating: D+. This was almost every battle royal that they’ve ever had on this series. At the end of the day there’s only so much you can do with a show like this as battle royals only have so many stories available. Spud was funny and him eliminating Ray put a good cap on their events, but this show exists in a vacuum so it’s not like this is going to mean anything long term.

Carter gets the money to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was one of the more entertaining One Night Onlys but it wasn’t great throughout. The Ray/Spud tag match was one of the most entertaining matches I’ve seen in years and the Beer Money vs. Wolves match was a very solid match in its own right. The one thing that sticks out to me more than anything though is how different this was from Impact.

Matches had time to play out, there were no swerves or heel authority figures dominating things, and no randomly thrown in gimmicks. It was VERY nice for a change and a good example of what TNA is capable of when they stop taking themselves so freaking seriously. Compare this to Sacrifice where a total of nothing happened and the show was horribly boring.

Also, the fact that this was $15 for the HD version is a big factor. For $15, this was a very solid way to spend two and a half hours watching wrestling, especially if you need a break from the WWE Network. The whole series of shows is far better than anything else you get from TNA and are actually worth checking out if you have nothing better to do.

Results
British Invasion b. Gunner/Chris Sabin – Top rope elbow to Sabin
Samoa Joe/Bad Bones b. Robbie E./Christopher Daniels – Muscle Buster to Daniels
Rockstar Spud/Bully Ray b. Mr. Anderson/Austin Aries – Rollup to Aries
Wolves b. Beer Money – Top rope double stomp to Storm
Eric Young/Ethan Carter III b. Curry Man/Kazarian – Rollup to Kazarian
Abyss/Samuel Shaw b. Jesse Godderz/Zema Ion – Standing choke to Godderz
ODB/Velvet Sky/Madison Rayne b. Alpha Female/Gail Kim/Lei’D Tapa – Bam to Tapa
Ethan Carter III won a battle royal last eliminating Magnus

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Clash of the Champions at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

It’s the go home show for Sacrifice and we have most of the card set up if you can remember some of the matches we’ve heard discussed here or there. Things are being set up for the TV show week to week, which defeats the purpose of having monthly PPVs but it’s TNA so you know they have to screw up something every now and then. Let’s get to it.

Angle is warming up in the back and says if Spud backs out of their match tonight, he’s coming for EC3.

We recap the World Title change from a few weeks ago and last week’s Monster’s Ball match.

Here’s Magnus with what looks like a grappling hook. He calls out Abyss because it’s the Monster’s fault that Magnus lost the title. Magnus calls Abyss a blithering idiot. The weapon in his hand is part of a turnbuckle and Magnus yells at Abyss for not coming down to ringside. Abyss says he’d be fired if he came down so Magnus fires him anyway. The monster says that it was never about the money but wanting to belong to someone. Abyss says he’s still a monster and looks to want a fight but here’s MVP to interrupt.

MVP says calm down and that Abyss isn’t his favorite person after Abyss hit him with a chair a few weeks ago. However, MVP is all about second chances so maybe Abyss should be offered a full time spot on the roster if he can win his match tonight. That match is of course against Magnus and MVP literally skips away. Abyss is thrilled and promises to take care of Magnus tonight.

Spud tells EC3 to save the speech this week but EC3 cuts him off and says last week he saw a ghost. It was actually real though and there’s only one man that can beat Angle: Carter himself. Tonight Spud needs to be a gazelle for Carter. Ethan adjusts Spud’s tie and the picture is starting to make sense to the Rockster.

Rockstar Spud vs. Kurt Angle

Spud goes for a leg dive and is literally thrown across the ring. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts Spud down and Angle no sells everything until Carter trips him up to give Spud quick control. Angle runs the ropes for the suplex and the ankle lock gets the win at 2:04.

Ethan clips Angle post match but Willow makes the save.

The Beautiful People promise to give Madison a makeover.

Kenny King is in MVP’s office when the boss comes in. King thinks he should be the top name on this program so MVP gives him a match right now.

Here’s Madison Rayne for even more talking. She calls out the Beautiful People so here’s Angelina to yell at her for trying to be a role model. Madison apologizes and the fight is on until the numbers catch up with her. They load up the bag but Brittany comes in to try for a save. That goes as well as you would expect and Velvet hits In Yo Face to Madison. Now Rayne gets the bag.

Mr. Anderson has something special planned for Samuel Shaw tonight.

Gail Kim wants to team up with Madison to help fight the Beautiful People. Madison accepts and Brittany promises to be there again.

Kenny King vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley easily throws King down a few times to start and runs him over before throwing King off a headlock. King bails to the floor and tries to sneak up on Bobby, only to have Lashley pull a reverse leapfrog into a powerslam. Lashley moves the referee out of the corner and blocks a pike in the eye but gets caught by the other hand. King snaps Bobby’s throat across the top rope and scores with a springboard missile dropkick.

Bobby fights back with pure power and hits a hard shoulder in the corner. Lashley grabs King’s boot to the ribs but gets kicked in the head. King tries a Blockbuster but gets caught in mid air for a suplex. That looked awesome. King dives away to avoid the spear and takes the countout at 5:37.

Rating: D+. The Blockbuster counter was awesome but this was a VERY dull match otherwise. It was basically a squash until King walked out at the end. I’m not sure how seeing Kenny getting beaten up for four minutes and then leaving makes me want to see him fight even more but there are a lot of things I don’t get in TNA.

Mr. Anderson goes to see Samuel Shaw’s family and the mom’s name is Christy. Anderson’s face is rather amusing. More on this later.

Beer Money has a talk in the back and after ranting about history a bit, Storm wants credit for making Gunner what he is today.

Austin Aries vs. MVP

This is a result of Aries turning his back on MVP at Lockdown and then losing the match. Aries grabs a cravate to start but MVP takes over with a wristlock. A nice flip gets Aries out of a headlock and he nails MVP with a low dropkick. MVP comes right back with a facebuster and the Ballin Elbow but Aries bails outside. The boss dives onto Aries as the announcers are in their own little world. Aries dropkicks him back to the floor and hits a top rope ax handle so let’s talk about Abyss.

Back in and the slingshot hilo sets up a running elbow drop for two on MVP and a middle rope elbow to the back gets the same. Aries misses the running dropkick but bites his way out of a standing choke. MVP comes right back with a discus lariat for two but walks into a facebuster to put both guys down. Aries misses a 450 and the Drive By is good for the pin at 6:38.

Rating: C. It’s the best match and segment of the night but I’m still not interested in what they’re doing here. That’s the story of the entire show so far: it’s just not all that interesting and things aren’t getting much better. MVP beating Aries changes nothing and it ends a storyline that didn’t have a lot of interest in the first place. How does seeing this make me want to buy Sacrifice?

Video on Sanada.

Back at the Shaw house with the mom straight out of Leave it to Beaver talking about how talented her son is. She’s baking homemade apple pie for Samuel who still lives in the basement. So what was the apartment he took Christy to a few months ago?

James Storm/Bobby Roode vs. Bully Ray/Gunner

Storm grabs a headlock on Ray after a break but both members of Beer Money are taken down with backdrops. Gunner comes in to work on Storm’s arm as we hear about their latest gimmick match on Sunday, this one being an I Quit match. Ray fights out of the corner but Roode distracts the referee so Storm can crotch him against the post. Storm: “IT’S BECAUSE YOU’RE FAT!”

Back in and Roode cranks on a front facelock until Ray fights up, only to be slammed back down. Ray comes back with a suplex and makes the hot tag to Gunner for some house cleaning. Gunner plays D-Von for What’s Up on Storm and it’s table time. Ray misses an elbow from the apron to drive himself through the table. Back inside Gunner hits an F5 on Roode but walks into the Last Call for the pin at 7:05.

Rating: C-. Nothing wrong with mixing up two feuds, but at the end of the day I’ve seen Gunner vs. Storm so many times now that I’m not interested in it anymore. Roode vs. Ray is fine but I’ve pretty much forgotten why they’re fighting (and no I’m not asking people to tell me). The match was fine though.

Magnus says it’s his time.

Anderson goes downstairs with the mom giving a creepy wave as the door shuts. Mr. sees something and says oh my god as we go to a break.

Anderson looks at the room and it’s designed like an 8 year old’s. Shaw comes in and does something as the cameraman leaves. The mom is still the same kind of Stepford Wife that she was before and hugs her son as he comes up from the basement. Creepy, creepy segment.

Beautiful People vs. Gail Kim/Madison Rayne

Madison cleans house to start and the Beautiful People are knocked to the floor for a double dropkick through the ropes. Velvet and Madison are back in the ring now for Madison’s crotch slam to the mat before it’s back to Gail for some right hands and a clothesline. Kim misses a charge into the corner and it’s off to Angelina for some shots to the face. She gets caught in the corner for Gail’s running cross body to the ribs though and everything breaks down.

Back in for a leg choke from Gail to make Angelina look annoyed. Sky’s distraction breaks up the hold and Angelina grabs a sleeper, only to have Gail come out with a backbreaker. Rayne comes back in for a bad looking enziguri as the crowd goes SILENT. Not for a botch or anything but because they just don’t seem interested. Thankfully Angelina gets the hint and rolls up Madison with a handful of tights for the pin at 5:00.

Rating: D. The crowd told the whole story here. There was just nothing interesting going on out there and the people didn’t care. It’s the same story we’ve seen about 8,000 times now in this division and nothing has changed at all. The Beautiful People aren’t interesting as there’s no one to fight them because TNA can’t make new stars for this division. Where was Brittany either?

Knux is back at the carnival with I think his ex-girlfriend. He says he has to go back to Impact because it’s what he does best. She’ll be supportive of him for the first time, but says she’s going with him.

Abyss says he lost sight of the one person who cares about him and tonight is for him.

The Wolves want the Tag Team Titles. It’s a handicap match with Zema Ion joining the Bro Mans.

We run down the PPV card.

Magnus vs. Abyss

Eric Young comes out for commentary and if Abyss wins he gets a full time job. Abyss takes him into the corner to start and nails some clotheslines before launching the Brit to the floor. Back with Magnus working on the leg as Abyss is supposed to be a face after being all violent for so many weeks. The leg is wrapped around the post but Abyss grabs him by the throat…..and Magnus kicks him low for the DQ at 7:40.

Rating: D. Well that….happened. It’s angle advancement but much like the rest of this show, the angles aren’t all that interesting. This was supposed to be a big face turn for Abyss I think, but it really doesn’t work when he spent the last few weeks trying to torture the new top face.

Post match Magnus beats on him with a chair until Young comes down and gets beaten down as well.

An ad for the fallout show from Sacrifice eats up the last minute. Not an ad FOR THE PAY PER VIEW mind you, but an ad for the TV show you just watched.

Overall Rating: D. This was a really boring show. That’s the best word to describe it as almost nothing on here made me want to watch another show going forward. It’s a bunch of ideas we’ve seen before with a lot of the same characters and nothing that has been made better by changing around the faces. Sacrifices just does not need to be a PPV as TNA currently feels like a bunch of old ideas thrown into a blender and put on mix to see if it works better if you twist everything around. Shockingly enough, it’s not working.

Results
Kurt Angle b. Rockstar – Ankle lock
Bobby Lashley b. Kenny King via countout
MVP b. Austin Aries – Drive By
Bobby Roode/James Storm b. Gunner/Bully Ray – Last Call to Gunner
Beautiful People b. Madison Rayne/Gail Kim – Rollup to Rayne
Abyss b. Magnus via DQ when Magnus kicked Abyss low

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Clash of the Champions at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

Lethal Lockdown seems to be too easy to mess up.  At the end of the day, MVP’s team is just too strong to lose a straight match, but the last thing I want to see is Dixie begging to get power back.  The second to last thing I want to see is Dixie with all the power, but it seems that we’re going to get one of those things.  You know, because Dixie is what really drives TNA of course.  I’ll go with Team Dixie for the win in a screwjob ending, because that’s what TNA does when they have something good going.

Storm over Gunner with the Last Call.  Gunner isn’t a long term top guy and I think TNA knows it.

I’ll take Gail to win the Knockouts Title in the cage because we haven’t gone long enough without Gail talking about how she is the best Knockout in the world and issuing open challenges for the title because the idea of having a story in that division is just not going to happen no matter how long we need one.

There’s a six man X-Division tag with three guys from Wrestle-1 in Japan against Bad Influence and Chris Sabin.  I still don’t get how thi sis supposed to appeal to the American fans.  It helps a bit with the international fans, which is fine but it might be a good idea to focus on America where the business is based.  Does TNA think people are going to buy this show for Great Muta, who was a hot young act nearly 25 years ago?  The other guys are the current X-Division Champion who beat Aries for the title in Japan recently and a guy who doesn’t even have a Wikipedia page.  I get that the match will be action packed and fun, but it’s only going to do them so much good.  Then again I’ve never been a fan of the invasion angles at all.

Tigre Uno over Manik.  They’ve spent too much time building up Tigre with promos to have him lose his debut.

I’ll go with Samuel Shaw over Anderson, setting up a rematch down the line.

Ethan Carter III over whoever they bring in to face him in Angle’s place.

Overall Lockdown doesn’t really interest me all that much.  At the end of the day, they have eight matches on the card.  Two of them are with guys debuting for the company with no story and a third is a mystery opponent.  When you’re only running one PPV every six months, I need a little big more than a card with nearly half the matches having no backstory.  The show should be fun as TNA PPVs usually deliver, but this doesn’t blow my skirt up.  The fact that every match is in a cage makes it even worse.

Thoughts/predictions?