Monday Night Raw
Date: July 16, 2007
Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for the Great American Bash and that means we need to finalize some of the card. The show’s main event is set as Bobby Lashley will challenge John Cena for the Raw World Title, but there are still a few things that can be added. Maybe we can even get an interesting card together. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We open with HHH’s King of Kings theme, but it’s King Booker and Queen Sharmell coming out instead. Booker thinks you might have been expecting someone else, but suggesting that HHH is the King of Kings is blasphemy. There is one King on Raw and it is NOT HHH. Therefore, as of right now, HHH is stripped of the name king, leaving Booker alone as the King. Well save for one person, which sends Booker over to Jerry Lawler.

Booker has respected him for many, many (of) years but now he wants Lawler to drop the King name. Lawler says he’s been a fan of Booker for many years, but he has been the King for thirty years and thinks they can co-exist. That’s not cool with Booker because it DEFIES THE VERY NATURE OF MONARCHY! Booker wants Lawler to kiss his ring, but that is a flat out no. You don’t tell Booker no so he ORDERS Lawler to do it instead. Still a no, so Booker is ready to fight, only to get punched down. Referees break it up and I think we have a match for later. Lawler looked fired up here and the fans seemed into it.

Ric Flair picks John Cena over Bobby Lashley. This goes on a bit longer than it needs to.

Jeff Hardy vs. William Regal vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Santino Marella

Elimination rules and the winner gets an Intercontinental Title shot against Umaga at Great American Bash. Hardy and Benjamin go to the floor to start, leaving Santino to cross armbreaker Regal to the ropes. The other two get back in with Shelton suplexing Santino for two, allowing Regal to knee Santino in the head for the fast pin. Benjamin goes after Regal but has to catch Hardy in an electric chair.

We take a break and come back with Hardy taking a double suplex for a double two. Benjamin and Regal get into a fight because they’re kind of schnooks, including Regal suplexing him down. The villains ram heads, leaving Jeff to unload on Regal in the corner. The slingshot dropkick misses though and Regal gets to hammer away again.

A missed charge goes badly though as Hardy grabs the Twist of Fate to get us down to two. Benjamin is right back up with the Blockbuster for two of his own but Hardy sends him outside for the slingshot dive. Back in and the Swanton misses but Hardy kicks out anyway. Benjamin grabs a piledriver, which is reversed into a quick rollup to give Hardy the pin (that was kind of sudden so I wonder if something was changed on the fly there).

Rating: C. The ending was a bit odd but moving Hardy into this spot is a good idea. He and Marella were the only realistic options and I don’t think anyone is overly interested in another Marella vs. Umaga match. Hardy is the kind of guy you can get behind in a hurry and that should work out fine for Sunday.

Edge picks John Cena.

Randy Orton is ready to destroy Cody Rhodes. Look at what he did to Shawn Michaels and imagine what he can do to Cody. Then imagine what he’s going to do to Dusty Rhodes on Sunday. Orton wants Dusty there ringside so he can get a preview.

Maria tries to console Santino Marella, who talks about watching Transformers yesterday. He feels like he doesn’t belong here….but spending the night with her could help him. Maria seems game, mainly due to the offer of pancakes the next morning.

Batista picks Bobby Lashley.

Snitsky likes to hurt people.

Snitsky vs. Val Venis

Snitsky powers him down to start with the shoulders and clotheslines. The pumphandle slam is good for the fast pin on Venis.

Post match, Snitsky hits another pumphandle slam for good measure.

Cody Rhodes talks about how proud he is of his dad and knows he could never be a bigger star than Dusty. There is no RKO that can slow down and he’s ready for Orton.

Here is Jerry Lawler in the ring to explain the Texas Bullrope match. Lawler goes over the rules, including the things he has seen Dusty Rhodes do to people in this match before. Cue Randy Orton to cut him off though….and doesn’t actually do anything. This is something Lawler should do more often, as he can explain things well and is someone fans will listen to.

Video on Randy Orton ending some careers.

Cody Rhodes vs. Randy Orton

This is Cody’s in-ring debut and Dusty Rhodes is in his corner. Cody jumps over him in the corner to start but gets blasted by a clothesline for his efforts. Orton takes too much time yelling at Dusty so Cody can start the comeback, only to miss a crossbody. There’s the powerslam into a knee drop as Orton is getting into a more serious mode. A snap suplex sets up the chinlock before Orton can hammer away again. Cody manages a shot to the face though and a missile dropkick gets two (with a big reaction from the crowd). The backbreaker cuts Cody off though and it’s the RKO for the fast pin.

Rating: C-. It wasn’t much more than a squash, but that’s all it should have been. Cody is in his first match on Raw so what would you expect him to be able to do to someone like Orton here? Orton wasn’t even all that evil here but he never felt like he was in any serious danger. This went as it should have and it could have been a lot worse, as Cody does seem to have been well trained.

Post match, Dusty comes in to check on Cody but glares at Orton for teasing the Punt.

Steve Austin picks John Cena.

Melina vs. Mickie James

Beth Phoenix and Candice Michelle are here too. Melina glares at Candice so Mickie rolls her up for a fast two. Back up and Mickie sends her face first into the corner but a Beth distraction lets Melina score with a kick to the ribs. A neck crank keeps Mickie in trouble but she fights up and grabs a neckbreaker for two. Mickie’s hurricanrana out of the corner has Melina rocked but Beth grabs Mickie’s leg. That’s enough for Melina to hit the standing legdrops for the fast pin.

Rating: C. This was a fine way to build Melina back up to the next title match as now Candice might have to worry about Beth as well. Mickie is bulletproof in this division so having Melina beat her while cheating is hardly a horrible situation. Not exactly a must see match, but it got things ready for the Great American Bash.

Smackdown Rebound.

William Regal comes up to Jim Duggan (what a pair), who gives us some fast catchphrases. Coach has sent Regal to get the 2×4 because he wants it bronzed. Duggan says no one puts his hands on his hardware, sending them into a series of innuendos (being down on knees and wood in hand are mentioned). Ron Simmons comes in for the catchphrase and Regal does his disgusted face.

Mick Foley picks Bobby Lashley.

Carlito vs. Sandman

Sandman goes technical to start with a wristlock and manages to take Carlito down. Back up and Carlito slugs away, even busting Sandman open a bit. The neck crank goes on but Sandman fights up without much trouble. Cue William Regal (who Sandman took out last week) to jump Sandman for the DQ.

Post match Jim Duggan makes the save to actually pay off the earlier segment. I wouldn’t have bet on that one.

JBL picks John Cena.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Super Crazy

Fallout from Crazy stealing a pin on Kennedy a few weeks ago in the Beat The Clock Challenge. Kennedy shoves him into the corner to start but Crazy comes out with a spinwheel kick. Crazy hammers away in the corner until a forearm cuts that off in a hurry. They slug it out again until Kennedy goes to the eyes for a breather. The abdominal stretch goes on but Crazy escapes and slugs away again, including a running clothesline. Back to back moonsaults look to set up a third, only to have Kennedy crotch him on top. A reverse superplex finishes Crazy off.

Rating: C. Another short and to the point match here to blow off the mini feud. Crazy got a nice rub out of the whole thing but ultimately there is only so far for him to go. Kennedy is likely on his way back to the main event scene so there was no reason to not give him this win. I’m not sure what is next for him, but a win over Crazy at least gives him some momentum.

Great American Bash rundown.

Here is Coach to emcee the Bobby Lashley vs. John Cena face off. Coach lists off the people Cena has beaten and asks why Cena believes he can survive. Yes, Cena, with some fake tears, feels that his title reign could end because Lashley speared him a few weeks ago. And even worse: he never learned to read! We get the Billy Madison “I award you no points” line before Cena gets serious with Lashley.

Cena has fought the best and won and lost, but Lashley will get his best. Lashley isn’t into talking and turns over his podium but Coach cuts them off. That’s too much for Lashley, who goes after Coach, only to have Cena tell him to focus on what matters. They do the big showdown but referees get Lashley to the back. Cena promises to test Lashley on Sunday so here is Lashley again, meaning the brawl is on to end the show. This was a pretty by the book segment but it worked, partially due to Cena’s energy.

Overall Rating: C+. There wasn’t much in the way of wrestling here but they made me want to see more than one match at the pay per view. Cena vs. Lashley went from big to epic in a hurry so points for doing what they do well. I’m looking forward to the pay per view and that’s a lot more important than having a good match on Raw.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: July 9, 2007
Location: Cajundome, Lafayette, Louisiana
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We are less than two weeks away from the Great American Bash and the big main event is set. WWE Champion John Cena will be defending the title against Bobby Lashley in a match that has to have Vince McMahon drooling. There are two shows left to build up to the show and that can be the important times on the way there. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Bobby Lashley vs. King Booker

Queen Sharmell is here with Booker in a rematch of last year’s King of the Ring finals (which JR mentions during the entrances). Lashley powers him around to start but charges into an elbow in the corner. Booker’s charge is countered into a powerslam though and Lashley plants him again for two. There’s another slam to put Booker down again but he’s back up with a spinning kick. Lashley isn’t having that and hits the Dominator, only to have Mr. Kennedy come in for the DQ.

Rating: C. This didn’t have time to go anywhere but Lashley was beating up a former World Champion and making it look pretty easy. They’re doing a great job of making Lashley feel like an unstoppable monster and that is where Cena shines most of the time. This didn’t need to go on much longer and they made their point while still protecting Booker a bit.

Post match the double teaming is on until Coach comes out to say not so fast. Tonight it was supposed to be Cena/Lashley vs. Kennedy/Booker, but since Cena is in Los Angeles (for a panel on Larry King Live), Lashley can pick another partner. Either that or have a handicap match. Lashley clears the ring to show off a bit.

Coach goes into his office to find William Regal, who he thanks for helping last week. Regal says he got some compliments for bringing something fresh to Raw, but Coach has him in a match with Sandman tonight. Regal doesn’t seem pleased but he’s in.

Intercontinental Title: Umaga vs. Santino Marella

Umaga is defending after taking the title from Santino last week. The strikes to Umaga are as effective as you would expect and he plants Santino with the spinning Rock Bottom. Cue Maria to cheer for Santino (Lawler approves) as Santino is sent chest first into the corner. Umaga does it again as this is total dominance so far. The middle rope headbutt misses though and Santino hammers away, only to get knocked right back down in a hurry. The running hip attack crushes Santino in the corner and the Samoan Spike retains the title.

Rating: D+. Total and complete destruction here and that should wrap it up for Santino’s title shots. There is no reason to believe that Santino can hang with Umaga in a one on one match without assistance so this is the right way to wrap it up. Umaga can find some more people to fight for the title and odds are almost anyone would give him a better challenge at the moment.

Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Highlanders

Non-title and I had forgotten that the Highlanders were a thing around here. Cage runs Rory over with a shoulder to start and grabs a headlock to take him over again. Murdoch comes in for a headlock takeover of his own as this is another one sided match to start. A running elbow in the corner staggers Rory again and we hit the chinlock with a knee in his back. Rory gets up and his a jawbreaker to get a breather though and the hot tag brings in Robbie to clean house. Everything breaks down and a high/low finishes for Murdoch out of nowhere.

Maria apologizes to Santino Marella for the loss and suggests they go out tonight. Marella suggests he help her at his hotel, with Maria agreeing, as they could watch a movie. Or something.

Charlie Haas makes fun of Shelton Benjamin for kissing King Booker’s hand last night. Shelton, the birthday boy, is so confident that he’ll win tonight that if he doesn’t, he’ll kiss….Haas….on the lips. Haas is down and then realizes what he said. Oddly enough, no Ron Simmons cameo.

Video on John Cena.

Snitsky vs. Super Crazy

Snitsky powers him into the corner to start but charges into a boot. That’s about it for Crazy’s offense as Snitsky hits him in the back and whips him hard into the corner again. The pumphandle slam finishes for Snitsky in just over a minute.

Post match, Snitsky hits another pumphandle slam for a bonus.

We recap Randy Orton disrespecting Dusty and (the debuting) Cody Rhodes last week by slapping Dusty in the face. This week, Dusty wants some revenge.

HHH is coming back.

Here is Dusty Rhodes for a chat and he wastes no time in calling out Randy Orton. Cue Orton, with Dusty saying there was no way that it was going to be over last week when Orton slapped him in the face. Now is Orton just going to stand there and look stupid? Orton doesn’t want to hear the “respect your legends” speech again but Dusty goes on a mini rant about Orton spitting in Harley Race’s face. Dusty wants to hear about what Orton has done in the ring, so Orton talks about injuring Shawn Michaels and Rob Van Dam. That’s not how you gain respect, and LOOK AT DUSTY WHEN HE IS TALKING TO YOU!

Orton challenges him to a match at the Great American Bash, but Dusty says not so fast because he’s old and retired. That’s not cool with Orton, so he suggests that he’ll just end Cody Rhodes’ career instead. Dusty is willing to fight, but we’ll make it a Texas Bullrope match. Deal, with Orton saying Cody needs to be there to pick up the pieces. Cue Cody (Runnels according to JR), with Orton telling him to get out of the ring before he gets hurt. Cody slaps Orton in the face and Orton bails without going after the two of them.

Paul London vs. Shelton Benjamin

This could be good. Shelton powers out of a top wristlock attempt to start and then takes London down into a front facelock without much trouble. Back up and London kicks away at the ribs for little effect so he grabs a front facelock of his own. That’s broken up as well so Benjamin snaps off a backbreaker, setting up an armbar of all things. London fights up with a hurricanrana into a small package for two, only to have Benjamin go right back to the arm. That doesn’t seem to bother London, who grabs a victory roll for the fast pin.

Rating: C. This was good while it lasted but it didn’t have a ton of time to go anywhere. That being said, this is about as good as you’re going to get from these two as far as time goes, as WWE has never exactly shown much interest in a serious push for London. Then there is Benjamin, and there is no reason to believe in any push he receives ever again.

Mr. Kennedy jumps the banged up Super Crazy for last week.

Shelton Benjamin seems hesitant to kiss Charlie Haas but Haas will settle for a kiss on the hand. They hug, and NOW Ron Simmons comes in for the catchphrase.

Melina/Jillian Hall vs. Candice Michelle/Mickie James

Hold on though as Melina has a sprained ankle, but she has a replacement: the returning Beth Phoenix. Melina sits in on commentary as Beth hits Mickie with what would become known as the Glam Slam. Candice gets the tag just a few seconds later as everything breaks down in a hurry. Jillian side slams Candice for two but gets caught in a backslide to give Candice the fast pin. This was nothing.

Post match Beth and Jillian beat down Candice, with Melina literally jumping in to help as a villain should.

Smackdown Rebound.

HHH is still coming back.

King Booker isn’t happy that HHH is coming back but here is Mr. Kennedy to interrupt. Kennedy says Bobby Lashley made them look like fools last week but Booker says that was just Kennedy. Revenge will be theirs!

Sandman vs. William Regal

Carlito is on commentary. Regal hammers away in a pair of corners to start as Carlito accuses Sandman of being drunk. Sandman comes back with a knee to the face but has to go after Carlito with the kendo stick. Another shot drops Regal to DQ Sandman.

Video on Bobby Lashley.

John Cena joins us via satellite and talks about how nice it was for Larry King to have people willing to have an intelligent discussion on wrestling on his show. As for Lashley, it’s true that he is an uncrowned champion. At the Great American Bash, we’ll find out who the real champion is.

Great American Bash rundown. That’s not a bad looking show.

Bobby Lashley/??? vs. Mr. Kennedy/King Booker

The mystery partner is….Jeff Hardy. I’ve heard worse ideas. In something I wouldn’t have guessed, Hardy is a bit taller than Lashley. Anyway, Booker and Hardy get things going with Booker missing an early ax kick attempt. Hardy starts in on the arm but gets taken into the corner for some knees to the ribs. Kennedy comes in and gets to stomp away in the corner until Hardy mule kicks his way to freedom.

The tag brings in Lashley to clean house, including a suplex to Kennedy. Booker gets knocked to the floor and Lashley plays Matt Hardy for some Poetry in Motion. A cheap shot from the apron lets Kennedy take Jeff down but he’s right back with the Whisper in the Wind. Now the hot tag can bring in Lashley to clean house as everything breaks down. The spear hits Kennedy with Booker making the save, so Hardy takes Booker outside. A leapfrog over Kennedy sets up another spear to give Lashley the pin.

Rating: C. This was a house show main style match and that’s all it was supposed to be. Cena had WWE business to tend to so putting Hardy in at the last minute was as good of an option as they probably had. The match wasn’t anything memorable, but it gave Lashley the chance to wreck some people and look great on the way to the pay per view title match.

Overall Rating: C-. There were some good pieces on the show but it felt like they were going through stuff as fast as they could have. Cena not being around changed a few things but I don’t think him being here would have brought the show up that much. It’s much more skippable than bad, though in a way that’s a worse situation to have.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: July 2, 2007
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 13,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re back to normal this week and that means it is time to get ready for the Great American Bash. Since we have nothing to go on after last week, I’m curious to see where this is going to go, but Vengeance would seem to suggest Bobby Lashley as the next challenger to John Cena. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of John Cena retaining the WWE Title in the five way match at Vengeance.

Opening sequence.

Here is Mr. Kennedy for a chat. His name is Mr. Kennedy (no repeat) and he should be WWE Champion. He never got the chance to do that though and it was because of these people. These people convinced him to defend his Money in the Bank briefcase before he was ready so from now on he is caring for himself only.

Cue John Cena to interrupt to welcome the new guy to Raw but Cena can’t remember his name. Cena knows that Kennedy likes to talk (Cena: “A lot.”) but now we are on Monday Night Raw, where anything can happen. After calling him Mr. Kenny G., Cena says he doesn’t trust Kennedy, as someone who threw away the biggest moment in WWE history. They go nose to nose but here are King Booker and Queen Sharmell to interrupt.

Booker says he should be the next challenger for the WWE Title (that’s so strange to hear these days) but Cena doesn’t take kindly to him. The challenge is officially laid out but here is Randy Orton to interrupt. Orton talks about all the things he has done on Raw but he has never had a one on one title match against Cena (that’s hard to fathom).

Cue Bobby Lashley to say he is the uncrowned champion because he never lost the ECW World Title. Lashley challenges as well, but William Regal, who is in charge tonight, because Jonathan Coachman is on vacation this week, interrupts. Tonight it’s a Beat The Clock Challenge and the winner will receive a title shot against Cena at the Great American Bash. We’ll even have a CONTRACT SIGNING tonight!

Beat The Clock Challenge: Jeff Hardy vs. Randy Orton

Hardy rolls him up for an early two to start but Orton is out of the corner with a hard clothesline for two of his own. The stomping and legdrop give Orton two and we hit the chinlock, which doesn’t seem too bright in a match like this. A waistlock and slam give Orton two and it’s off to a bodyscissors with an armbar.

Hardy is back up with something like a Sling Blade to set up the slingshot dropkick in the corner. It’s too early for the Swanton though and Orton snaps his throat across the top. Hardy comes back with the Whisper in the Wind but Orton shrugs it off and grabs the RKO for the pin to set the time at 7:06.

Rating: D+. There’s something so annoying about having wrestlers suddenly wrestle a completely nonsensical style in a match like this. Since when would Orton be stupid enough to throw on a bodyscissors to kill time in a match where he is supposed to be going as fast as he can? It feels like a way to extend the match and therefore the clock, which could be done by just having a regular match.

Melina vs. Maria

Candice Michelle is on commentary. Maria takes her down and does the hair grab/head smash stuff to start, as it’s probably her best choice. Back up and Melina throws her down and rips at the face for a bit but Maria kicks her down. A bulldog puts Melina down but she hits a faceplant for a breather. The standing legdrop finishes Maria in a hurry.

Post match Melina and Candice get in a brawl with Candice knocking her down.

Video on HHH’s knee injury, surgery, and recovery.

Dusty Rhodes introduces Jim Duggan to his son Cody Rhodes. Randy Orton comes in to say Cody will be better than Dusty one day, though Orton threatens to kill his legend early. Dusty says that was disrespectful so Orton slaps him in the face. Cody has to be held back.

We recap Santino Marella winning the Intercontinental Title in Italy. It feels like we’ve seen that clip a few hundred times now. In a less seen clip, Umaga smashed Marella at Vengeance but lost via DQ.

Santino checks on Maria, who wants him to be careful against Umaga tonight. He has to do this and gives her a kiss on the cheek.

Intercontinental Title: Umaga vs. Santino Marella

Marella is defending and his kicks to the leg don’t do much. A dropkick doesn’t either as Umaga takes it outside to drop Marella hard on the floor. Back in and Marella avoids a charge into the post but Umaga sends him out again. The Samoan drop plants Marella back inside, setting up the running hip attack in the corner. The Samoan Spike gives Umaga the title back in a complete squash.

Rating: D+. That’s what it should have been as there is no reason for Marella to have a chance against Umaga in a straight match. Umaga is still a beast and someone who can run through just about anyone, with Marella being no exception. This is how the match should have gone and Marella’s title reign can go away so he can find a way to become interesting.

Beat The Clock Challenge: King Booker vs. Val Venis

The time is set at 7:06. Booker goes with a fast rollup to start, giving us an early standoff. Some strikes put Venis in the corner but he comes out with a suplex for two of his own. A cross armbreaker of all things sends Venis to the rope so Booker grabs a backbreaker for two. Booker misses a kick to the face and Venis strikes away, setting up a neckbreaker for two of his own. Not that it matters as Booker is right back with the ax kick for the pin, setting the time at 4:30.

Rating: C-. Slightly better than the first match but the levels of talent in the opponents are a bit off. Booker isn’t the most likely contender but he’s just right as someone who could pose enough of a threat that he’s worth keeping an eye on. Not much of a match here, though that’s not exactly the point in this thing.

Mr. Kennedy wants Super Crazy to lay down for him. The offer of some pesos has Crazy’s attention.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Mr. Kennedy vs. Super Crazy

The time is set at 4:30. Kennedy tells him to lay down but grabs the mic to yell at the fans, allowing Crazy to grab a rollup for the fast pin.

Shelton Benjamin comes up to King Booker, who goes on a rant about Mr. Kennedy. Booker wants Benjamin to outlast Bobby Lashley tonight, with promises of a future title shot if he pulls it off.

Dusty Rhodes wants Randy Orton next week.

Carlito annoys Jillian Hall when Sandman comes in to spit beer at him. Ron Simmons, catchphrase.

Carlito vs. Sandman

Sandman drives him into the corner to start but Carlito switches places and stomps away. Sandman’s throat is snapped across the top and a snapmare of all things gives Carlito two. We hit the neck crank as Carlito certainly has a target to start. With that broken up, Carlito grabs the kendo stick but Sandman takes it away and smashes Carlito for the DQ.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Bobby Lashley vs. Shelton Benjamin

The time is set at 4:30. Lashley takes him to the mat to start so Benjamin bails to the floor to burn some time. Back in and an overhead belly to belly suplex rocks Benjamin but the threat of the spear sends him outside again. Back in again and Benjamin counters a backdrop into a DDT (cool) for a fast two. Lashley suplexes him down and hits some running clotheslines, followed by something like a powerslam for two of his own. Benjamin slips out of the running powerslam and hits a superkick. The springboard spinning clothesline….is speared out of the air to give Lashley the pin to beat the time at 4:05.

Rating: C. The athleticism alone was worth seeing as these two can do some amazing things in the ring. Benjamin getting to jump around all over the place is always worth seeing but Lashley was all but destined to get the title shot at Cena. They had a good finish on top of everything else so this worked.

HHH is coming back, date unknown.

Here is William Regal to run the John Cena vs. Bobby Lashley contract signing. Cena comes out and says they know each other so let’s get this over with. Cena knows Lashley is a great star and this will be a heck of a match. Lashley agrees and signs but here are Mr. Kennedy and King Booker to interrupt. The brawl is on and the villains are cleared out and Cena signs, but Lashley spears him down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I can go for a show that is built around one idea like we had here, as this was almost all about setting up the title match. There are better ways to set it up than a Beat The Clock Challenge but at least they got everything done in a hurry. This wasn’t a show set up for the wrestling but we had some decent enough matches. Now just get us to the pay per view and the huge showdown and they should be rolling on the way to Summerslam.

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: June 5, 2007
Location: Amway Arena, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re done with One Night Stand and some ECW things actually took place on the show. First and foremost, Bobby Lashley got the ECW World Title back from Vince McMahon, which should wrap their feud up for good. Other than that, Rob Van Dam seems to be out of action for the time being after Randy Orton beat the living daylights out of him. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Lashley winning the handicap match to get the title back.

Opening sequence.

Here is Vince McMahon, sitting in a rocking chair on a platform, with a rather annoyed glare on his face. Bobby Lashley comes out as Vince keeps rocking back and forth without doing much of anything.

Bobby Lashley vs. Tommy Dreamer/Sandman/Balls Mahoney

Non-title hardcore match. The trio grabs their weapons and start swinging to put Lashley on the floor. Back in and they do it again, followed by a third time for good measure. For some reason Dreamer thinks a suplex is a good idea and gets suplexed down for his efforts. Sandman and Mahoney drape Lashley over the top with Sandman dropping a leg to the back of the neck. Dreamer is back in for the baseball slide to the chair in the Tree of Woe. It’s table time (because of course) but Mahoney chairs Dreamer by mistake. That’s enough for Lashley to put Sandman through the table and spear Mahoney down for the pin.

Rating: C-. You can only get so much out of something like this as Lashley isn’t going to lose to three people so low on the totem pole. I guess this is the best punishment Vince can muster at the moment and while it wasn’t awful, it was spending a few minutes waiting around for Lashley to beat them up. Just find something better for Lashley to do already.

Post match, Lashley poses in front of Vince, who doesn’t move.

Kevin Thorn vs. Stevie Richards

Richards forearms away to start and sends Thorn outside. The dive off the apron is pulled out of the air though, allowing Thorn to drive him into the apron. Back in and the chinlock goes on until Richards fights up, only to be dropped face first onto the turnbuckle instead. Richards strikes away and sends Thorn throat first into the middle rope fir a change. A spinebuster cuts Richards off though and Original Sin is good for pin.

Rating: D. This was another boring one as Thorn isn’t all that interesting once he gets in the ring. The vampire deal is a cool idea but other than the finisher, he’s just another low level power guy. Richards was trying as always, but there wasn’t much anyone could do in these circumstances.

Extreme Expose, who mix it up this week by adding some dancing on the announcers’ table.

We look at Randy Orton injuring Rob Van Dam at One Night Stand, putting Van Dam on the shelf.

Elijah Burke/Marcus Cor Von vs. Major Brothers

Cor Von charges at them to start and the beating is on in a hurry. Brett starts working on the arm though and Brian comes in with a top rope ax handle. That doesn’t work so well so it’s off to Burke, who gets double hiptossed right back down. Cor Von isn’t having this though and comes back in to run both of them over.

A slam in the corner sets up Burke’s seated abdominal stretch, followed by Cor Von’s waistlock. Cor Von knees Brett in the ribs to cut off the comeback and Burke puts on a standing abdominal stretch. For some reason he lets that go though and knees Brett in the back, sending him over to the corner for the tag to Brian. The comeback doesn’t please Cor Von so he tags himself back in to hit the Pounce for the pin.

Rating: C-. You can definitely see something in the Major Brothers, as they feel like a team who know each other well. It also helps that they have gotten some TV time now and have a bit of familiarity with the fans. The New Breed is all but done at this point, but a win over the Majors isn’t going to hurt anyone at the moment.

We recap the opening match, including Vince McMahon almost looking like he was in a trance.

CM Punk vs. Matt Striker

Before the match, Striker promises to teach Punk a lesson to educate these people cheering for him. Punk leg lariats him down to start and a pair of kicks gets two more. Striker comes back with some suplexes and a slam, setting up the half crab. With that broken up, Striker hits a hanging swinging neckbreaker before going right back to the same hold. Punk escapes again and starts striking away, including the running knee in the corner. The bulldog sets up the GTS to give Punk the pin.

Rating: C-. There’s only so much you can get out of Striker, who much like Thorn, is a far better character that he is a wrestler. It also doesn’t help that Punk is one of the biggest stars on this show and isn’t losing to anyone but another big star. Striker put in the effort here, but it was only going to get him so far.

Overall Rating: D+. This was quite the lame duck show as we are less than a week away from the Draft so none of this really mattered all that much. Vince still being broken was the highlight, as he is still one of the best performers in the world. Things need to be shaken up around here so the Draft is coming at the right time, but it didn’t exactly make for a good show this week.

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One Night Stand 2007
Date: June 3, 2007
Location: Jacksonville Veterans Memorial, Jacksonville, Florida
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles, Tazz, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s what almost has to be the final cycle of Wrestlemania rematches and early summer stories. The build for this has not been great, which probably has a lot to do with it being a mere two weeks after Backlash. The card isn’t looking the best either, but maybe they can surprise me. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how everything is extreme rules for one night only, though in this case it means everything has its own stipulations. There’s a better name for the show in there somewhere.

Randy Orton vs. Rob Van Dam

This is a stretcher match and fallout from Orton attacking Van Dam and giving him a concussion, which was fallout from Orton attacking Shawn Michaels and giving him a concussion. Van Dam does the finger pointing and then kicks Orton in the face to start fast. Some more strikes keep Orton rocked early, including a running clothesline in the corner. A kick to the face sets up the spinning legdrop but Orton gets in a shot to the face to put Van Dam down, complete with bugged out eyes.

Van Dam is fine enough to kick Orton in the face but the jump to the top means a crash out to the floor. Orton slowly brings him back inside for the dropkick before slowly knocking Van Dam down a few times. The over the shoulder neckbreaker drops Van Dam but he falls off the stretcher. For some reason that wakes Van Dam up and he posts Orton down.

Now it’s Orton being laid on the stretcher for the spinning kick to the back. They head back inside with Van Dam hitting a clothesline but Rolling Thunder is reversed into the powerslam in a slick counter. Van Dam manages to toss him onto the stretcher again, but a big running flip dive over the top only hits floor in a nasty landing. Orton drops him onto the stretcher but Van Dam fights up and puts Orton on for the surprise win.

Rating: C. This was a bit of a weird match as Orton beat Van Dam up for a good while and then lost in the end, despite Van Dam looking destroyed more than once. Van Dam deserves some attention for his facials alone and there was a nice story being told. Maybe not a great match and I’m not sure on Orton winning, but they did something different enough here.

Post match Orton is right back up and beats Van Dam back to ringside. The Punt off the apron sets up the hanging DDT from the barricade, which ends Van Dam’s full time WWE career for the time being. Aside from some cameos, Van Dam would not be back until 2013.

Vince McMahon is worried about the street fight with Bobby Lashley but Shane McMahon says Umaga will take care of things. That helps, but Vince has a premonition of something bad happening to him.

Sandman/Tommy Dreamer/CM Punk vs. New Breed

Tables match, meaning we have tags. Dreamer and Cor Von go technical to start, including a butterfly suplex to put Dreamer down. Burke comes in but misses a charge in the corner, allowing the tag off to Sandman. That means a hiptoss before Punk comes in to a big reaction for some knees to Striker. Punk and Dreamer want some tables but Punk has to dive on Cor Von first.

Back in and Striker runs from Sandman and the kendo stick before Cor Von has to save him from the table. Burke hits a quick elbow to Punk’s bad ribs and it’s everyone inside to brawl again. We hit the parade of secondary finishers, including Cor Von Alpha Bombing Punk. Dreamer piledrives Burke and Punk superplexes Striker through Burke and the table for the win.

Rating: C-. This could have been any ECW On Sci Fi main event and that isn’t the worst place to be. The problem here was the time and the lack of any real story to the whole thing, as they just wildly brawled for the most part. Granted that’s what this probably should have been and now it is time to wrap up the New Breed as Punk can move on to something bigger.

Randy Orton comes up to see Edge and suggests that he’s coming for the World Heavyweight Title, if Edge beats Batista tonight and if he gets moved to Smackdown in the Draft. That’s quite the hypothetical and Edge doesn’t seem scared.

Raw Tag Team Titles: World’s Greatest Tag Team Team vs. Hardys

The Hardys are defending in a ladder match. It’s a fight to start with the Hardys knocking both of them down in a row. Since that doesn’t mean much in a ladder match, all four head outside and pick up a ladder of their own. The dueling is on until Haas gets crushed by ladders in the corner, setting up Poetry In Motion to Shelton to smash Haas again.

Haas is fine enough to get out and pull Jeff off the ladder but Matt is there to make the save. The Hardys go up at the same time (which is stupid), allowing Shelton to throw a ladder at them to bring them back down (I knew it was stupid). Jeff is sent face first into the ladder in the corner and Haas and Benjamin, apparently not learning, go up at the same time as well.

Matt breaks that up in a hurry but it’s time to set up ladder contraptions. That takes too long though and the Hardys send both of them back first into a ladder. Now it’s time to bring in the bigger ladders, because the ladder match checklist must be completed. One such ladder is bridged between the ring and the apron, with Benjamin being backdropped onto it in a hurry.

That’s not good enough so Jeff loads up something off the top but Haas belly to back superplexes him down. Haas leans Matt up against a ladder on the floor and Jeff gets t-boned. That doesn’t seem to bother Matt though as he shoves Haas and Benjamin down, the latter onto a ladder, setting up a Swanton to keep them down. Matt pulls the titles down to retain.

Rating: B. Like this wasn’t going to work. It’s a match I didn’t care to see but knew it was going to be good, which was absolutely what happened here. Sometimes you need to let people who are good at this kind of thing do their stuff and that was the case here. It was nothing that hadn’t been done before, but it was done well.

Great Khali promises to win.

Mark Henry vs. Kane

Lumberjack match and the lumberjacks get their own individual entrances. Henry powers him to the floor to start but Kane is back in to kick Henry in the face. That doesn’t bother Henry much either so Kane slugs him out to the floor and follows him out. This time Henry rams him into the post to start working on the back and hammers away in it inside. A test of strength doesn’t work well for Henry as Kane headbutts his way to freedom, only to get shouldered down.

Kane can’t pick Henry up and we hit the bearhug, with Henry eventually throwing him down. Henry gets tossed outside so Kane dives onto a bunch of people for the big crash. Back in and Kane hits the top rope clothesline to set up the chokeslam but the lumberjacks come in to beat him down. Since it’s No DQ, Henry grabs the bearhug again and Kane is out for the win.

Rating: D. The gimmick didn’t do the match any favors here and it felt rather forced in. I get that they had to do something to make this an extreme match but it was basically Henry hurting Kane’s back, some interference, and then Henry wins. That could have been done without the lumberjacks and that is never a good sign for any match.

The Hardys and the World’s Greatest Tag Team get in a fight backstage.

We recap Bobby Lashley vs. Vince McMahon for the ECW World Title. Lashley helped shave McMahon’s head at Wrestlemania so Vince swore revenge and eventually took the title with some help from Shane McMahon and Umaga. After screwing Lashley over a time or two, it is time for the final showdown in a street fight.

ECW World Title: Vince McMahon vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is challenging in a street fight and Shane McMahon/Umaga are here with Vince. Lashley wastes no time in diving over the top onto Umaga, who he grazes with his feet at best. Now it’s Shane getting beaten up and tossed onto Umaga at ringside, leaving Lashley to unload on Vince in the corner.

Umaga comes back in to miss a splash in the corner but Shane is back in with a DDT onto a chair. Vince clotheslines Lashley down and chokes in the corner before they head outside. More triple teaming ensues before heading back inside where Vince can hit a spear for two. Lashley pulls Vince in the way of Umaga’s splash though and the comeback is on.

Shane and Umaga are sent outside and Lashley unloads on Vince with a chair. The Dominator gets two with Umaga making the save, setting up a splash from the apron. Shane adds the top rope elbow through the announcers’ table and everyone is down again. That only gives Vince two back inside so Umaga hits the running hip attack in the corner. Shane misses Coast To Coast though and Lashley is back up with the spear to Vince to get the title back.

Rating: C. This was the fairly obvious way to go and there is nothing wrong with that. Sometimes you need to go in the logical way and this time around that meant Lashley running through the odds and getting the title back. Lashley is a monster, but now he needs something else to do, which unfortunately won’t involve Vince as the amazing ECW heel. Not a great match or a great brawl, but it did what it was supposed to do.

Post match Lashley hits another spear on Vince for a bonus.

Maria likes Santino Marella speaking Italian to her but she has to answer a question about the upcoming pudding match between Melina and Candice Michelle. As you might guess, her response features a lot of big words and scientific explanations about pudding. Candice pops up and asks for a kiss for luck. Maria obliges, so Santino says he loves America. Ron Simmons comes in for the catchphrase.

Melina vs. Candice Michelle

Non-title and they’re fighting in pudding. Candice shoves her down and they grapple around a lot, as you can probably guess how this is going. They fight on the floor a bit and Lawler can’t tell which is which, though he doesn’t seem to care. Melina licks some pudding off of her thumb and hits a DDT. Trash talking ensues, but Candice pulls her into a reverse chinlock for the tap (on pudding). Exactly what you would have expected.

Post match Maria comes in for an interview but gets pulled into the pudding. The referee is pulled in as well and Lawler is jealous.

We recap Edge vs. Batista for the Smackdown World Title. Edge cashed in Money in the Bank to take the title from Undertaker, then cheated to beat Batista at Judgment Day. Now it’s time for Batista to get his rematch inside a cage.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Edge

Edge is defending in a cage. Batista starts fast by taking him down and going up but it’s way too early for that. Edge tries to go up but gets pulled back down, earning himself a heck of a clothesline for two. A few shots to the face aren’t enough for Edge to get out as Lashley suplexes him down for two more.

Now it’s Batista going up, only to have his leg kicked out for the save. That’s enough to weaken Batista’s already damaged leg but he’s fine enough to catch Edge trying for the door. A superplex gives Batista two and they collide in the middle off a spear vs. running shoulder for the double knockdown. It’s Batista up first with a running clothesline and a swinging Boss Man Slam gets two.

A catapult sends Edge face first into the cage and Batista launches him face first in again. Somehow Edge manages a quick spear for two but Batista pulls him off the top for the same. The Batista Bomb is countered (with Edge’s thong sticking out) as Edge winds up on top. Batista follows him up but gets low blowed back down. Batista goes for the door but Edge climbs out to escape and retain.

Rating: C. That’s it? That felt like the setup for another false finish and then they just finished the match. It wasn’t terrible, but it seemed like they were missing the last five or so minutes. This should put Batista out of the title picture for the time being, though I’m not sure what that leaves for him to do at the moment. Edge can find someone new though, and he can do so after beating Batista pretty clean.

We recap John Cena vs. Great Khali. Cena retained the title at Judgment Day but Khali’s leg was underneath the ropes. That’s why tonight it’s a falls count anywhere match for the title, meaning the ropes can’t save Cena. The idea here is that Cena knows he’s facing a monster and might be in way over his head.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Great Khali

Cena is defending in a falls count anywhere match. Cena goes right after him to start but is quickly knocked down, including a bunch of stomping in the corner. There’s a slam to plant Cena but he gets in a shot of his own for a breather. Khali is right back up with a chop to the head to put Cena on the floor though and the foot on the chest gets two. A hard ram sends Cena head first through a monitor but another big chop is blocked.

Instead, Cena is tossed over the barricade but he manages a monitor shot of his own. The FU attempt is swatted away though and Khali punches him around. A missed charge (work with me here) misses for Khali and Cena hits him in the face with a boom camera for two. Cena gets him off the ground for the FU but some elbows to the face get Khali out of trouble again. They fight onto a crane, where Cena finally manages the FU off of said crane to retain the title.

Rating: C+. While certainly not a classic, they did this as well as they could have. What mattered here was they found the right way to hide Khali’s limitations and let Cena do the rest. The idea of setting up the FU for the whole match and then blowing it off in the end was the right call too and it was a well set up match. I’m not sure how much better they could have done this and the stipulation made the match better rather than just being tacked on.

Overall Rating: C. This was a show that focused almost entirely on the gimmicks and that was not a bad thing. The stories were either mostly done or not exactly exciting, so putting the emphasis on everything else they were doing was the right idea. It made for an easy show to watch, even if it didn’t feel all that important. We need to move on in a big way, but at least they had a fine enough show to wrap up this cycle.

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: May 8, 2007
Location: Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s another big show as we have the ECW World Title on the line. This time around that means Rob Van Dam challenging Vince McMahon…..with Shane McMahon and Umaga, because that’s how the title goes. Since it’s supposed to be EXTREME though, the stipulation makes logical sense. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Earlier today, Bobby Lashley arrived but ran into Armando Alejandro Estrada, flanked by police. If Lashley tries to get in or touches Estrada, he’s under arrest. That’s fine with Lashley, who shoves Estrada (in his wheelchair) into a dumpster (after a long ride). Lashley: “I guess you guys have to arrest me.” How do you get through this without showing any emotion?

Opening sequence, capped off by Vince McMahon as ECW World Champion.

CM Punk vs. Marcus Cor Von

Elijah Burke, who is facing Punk at Judgment Day, is here with Cor Von. As the match starts, we get a crawler saying that Edge just became the new World Heavyweight Champion. That’s one way to advertise things. Punk knocks Cor Von outside but gets clotheslined down for his efforts. Back in and Cor Von starts hammering away at the ribs, setting up the bearhug.

Cor Von drives him into the corner and puts on the bearhug again, followed by a waistlock to stay on the ribs. Punk slips out and grabs a neckbreaker for a much needed breather and a rather delayed two. A neck snap across the top rope sets up a springboard clothesline to give Punk two more but the tornado DDT is tossed outside. Burke gets in a cheap shot, allowing Cor Von to hit the Pounce for the pin.

Rating: C. Storyline advancement 201 here and that’s what it should have been. Cor Von gets a win and the Punk vs. Burke match gets a little more advancement. That’s a rather nice way to spend ten minutes and it’s not like Punk is hurt by a cheating loss. I think you know where this is going at Judgment Day and that’s perfectly fine.

We recap Edge becoming Mr. Money in the Bank on Raw.

Here’s another look at the Condemned.

Sandman vs. Snitsky

Given that Snitsky is Raw bound, this might be interesting. The big boot finishes Sandman in less than a minute. This was not interesting.

Vince McMahon is rather pleased with the Sandman being destroyed. Now that Bobby Lashley is in jail, they’re going to crush Rob Van Dam. Umaga screams a lot.

Extreme Expose.

We recap Vince McMahon winning the ECW World Title, Vince tormenting Bobby Lashley last night on Raw and Lashley getting arrested earlier today.

Elijah Burke tells Matt Striker that the New Breed is on a role and takes credit for what they have been doing. Burke wants Striker at ringside for his match tonight.

Elijah Burke vs. Brian Major

Matt Striker and Brett Major are here too. Burke takes him into the corner to start and hits a hard knee to the face to put Major down. A hard right hand puts Major down again and Burke knocks him into the corner again. Major slugs away for a comeback, only to miss a springboard spinning crossbody. The Elijah Experience finishes in a hurry.

Post match Burke tells Striker that’s how it’s done.

Kevin Thorn and Ariel have a bright future (in fresh blood), but it’s not with the New Breed.

ECW World Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Umaga/Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon

Van Dam is challenging and Shane handles his partners’ introductions. Shane starts for the team and it’s time for some shuffling. A rollup and armdrag have Shane in trouble, as he looks like he’s in over his head. Rob starts firing off the kicks, including one to cut off an invading Umaga. The numbers get the better of him though and Umaga shoves him into the barricade to take over.

Back in and Shane works on an armbar before throwing Van Dam back outside for another beating from Umaga. This time Umaga comes in to drop the big leg, followed by the Samoan drop. Van Dam gets pounded into the corner but manages a kick to the head to start the comeback. It’s time to go up but Shane crotches him, setting up the top rope superplex. Umaga adds the top rope splash and the Spike, allowing Vince to come in and steal the pin.

Rating: C. I’m not sure what else you were expecting here as it was Van Dam failing to beat impossible odds. While this match wasn’t great, it did a nice job of making Bobby Lashley look that much better when he pulls off the upset. Van Dam never had a chance here and I don’t think anyone was expecting otherwise, especially with the pay per view already set.

Post match the ECW Originals run out for the save to end the show. Joey: “Has Vince McMahon just killed the spirit of the original ECW?” After everything you’ve seen, that match is what killed ECW?

Overall Rating: C. Pretty run of the mill show here, which was more designed to set things up for the future than anything else. It wasn’t a bad show by any means but it also wasn’t particularly good, meaning we’ll put it right in the middle. There are things set up for the future and now we get to see how those stories play out, which means the plans are working.

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: May 1, 2007
Location: BJCC, Birmingham, Alabama
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Things changed again last week as CM Punk turned on the New Breed almost immediately after joining them. That certainly makes things more interesting, but it also makes Punk that much bigger of a star. If he isn’t a bigger deal than Rob Van Dam just yet, it isn’t going to be long. Oh and in a minor note: Vince McMahon is the new ECW World Champion. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Vince McMahon winning the ECW World Title at Backlash, with some help from Shane McMahon and Umaga.

Opening sequence.

Here is a ticked off Bobby Lashley to get things going. Vince McMahon may be the new ECW World Champion but no one outside of the McMahon family is happy about it. Lashley doesn’t care if his shoulder is banged up because he wants his rematch RIGHT NOW. Cue Armando Alejandro Estrada in a wheelchair and neck brace, saying Lashley isn’t going to ruin a special night.

Lashley is the reason Vince is bald and that Estrada is in the wheelchair (good for a sly smile), plus why he can’t manage Umaga right now. Vince has a message for Lashley though: he’ll get a rematch, but it won’t be tonight. Also, unless physically provoked, Lashley can’t touch either McMahon or Umaga. Lashley realizes that a certain name isn’t on that list and Estrada realizes the same. The wheelchair crashes shortly thereafter.

Elijah Burke gives the New Breed a pep talk, explaining how much CM Punk turned on all of them last week. From now on, follow his lead.

CM Punk comes out for a match so here is the New Breed, with Burke picking his opponent.

Kevin Thorn vs. CM Punk

Riveting choice. Thorn drives him into the corner and kicks away to start before pulling him throat first into the rope. The chinlock goes on as I can’t help but think there is something weird about a vampire/vampire enthusiast wearing a Nike elbow pad. Punk fights up and Thorn charges into some boots in the corner. The GTS finishes Thorn in a hurry.

The ECW Originals are annoyed at Vince McMahon for winning the ECW World Title. This aired on Raw.

Extreme Expose.

Kevin Thorn wants to know where the New Breed was. Elijah Burke doesn’t want to hear it and says any of the team could have beaten CM Punk. Thorn doesn’t want to hear it and quits the team.

More of the ECW Originals complaining about Vince McMahon winning the title. This also aired on Raw.

Snitsky video.

Marcus Cor Von/Matt Striker vs. Major Brothers

That would be Brett/Brian Major, better known as Zack Ryder/Curt Hawkins. Brian works on Striker’s wrist to start but gets pulled down by the hair for his efforts. The second attempt at arm cranking goes a bit better and it’s Brett coming in with a middle rope ax handle. Cor Von comes in and sends Brett outside so the beating can begin.

A gorilla press dropped back into a fall away slam gets two, with Brian having to make a save. The chinlock goes on to keep Brett in trouble but Cor Von misses a charge in the corner. The hot tag brings in Brian for two off a powerslam to Striker. Cor Von pulls Brett to the floor, leaving Striker to clothesline Brian. Back up and Brian hits a middle rope spinning crossbody for the completely clean pin on Striker.

Rating: C-. Not much of a match but dang that is a heck of an upset as the New Breed continues to fall apart. At some point you have to just give someone a win and that’s what they did here with the Major Brothers. The team was certainly more polished than your usual team from the corner to my left and it was a very nice surprise, especially with no interference.

Post match Striker claims a fast count but Elijah Burke doesn’t want to hear it. Striker walks away.

We look back at Umaga beating Rob Van Dam in a good match on Raw.

Here is Vince McMahon, and yes he does the open the jacket to reveal the belt thing (which he refers to as “exposing himself”. Vince is willing to defend the title against Lashley but Vince is going to decide on the details. We’ll get to that later though, because first up we have the ECW Originals. They aren’t happy with him as champion, but they should come say that to his face. The fans think someone sucks but Vince thinks they’re talking about the ECW Originals.

Vince invites the team out here and then gets in Van Dam’s face, with Van Dam saying Vince killed ECW. The title on Vince’s shoulder is a disgrace and it makes Van Dam sick. Vince moves on to Sabu….who we’ll talk to later as Sabu doesn’t talk. Sandman smells bad but he holds up three fingers and tells Vince to read between the lines.

Finally, Vince asks why Tommy Dreamer is wearing gold shoes and then asks what he thinks. Dreamer talks about the fans demanding the return of ECW and says the people at home pay his salary. They know about the spirit of ECW and that’s what matters. Vince asks which of them is ready to challenge him and all four are ready, but let’s have a four way #1 contenders dance instead. And let’s make it Extreme Rules! This idea makes sense on paper and it’s glorious to see Vince trolling ECW like this, but it’s a little hard to believe that Sandman or Sabu is going to work with Vince in any serious way.

Rob Van Dam vs. Sabu vs. Tommy Dreamer vs. Sandman

One fall to a finish and Extreme Rules and Vince provides all kinds of weapons. We get some rollups to start until they pair off, with Van Dam being kicked out to the floor. The weapons are brought in and Sandman clotheslines Sabu down for two. They start heading outside, with Sabu hitting a dive to take Van Dam off the apron for a nasty crash. Back in and Sandman bulldogs Dreamer onto a trashcan for two.

Vince is rather pleased that Dreamer is outside getting a chair to put Sandman in the Tree of Woe for the dropkick. Van Dam is back in to clean house with the chair but Dreamer hits him with a piledriver (giving us Van Dam’s bouncing sell). Sabu takes Sandman down and gets two off the triple jump moonsault. It’s time for the required table (Vince applauds), with Dreamer superplexing Sabu through Sandman through said table. Van Dam adds the Five Star to pin Sandman for the title shot.

Rating: C. This was about what you would expect from these four in this kind of a match, including a pretty obvious winner. Again, who else was going to be any kind of a realistic opponent for McMahon? Even in a one off match, it’s not like there is a ton of star power around here. This Vince vs. ECW deal sounds good on paper, but it kind of falls apart once you look at the ECW roster.

Overall Rating: C. They were focusing on setting things up for later here and you have to do that every now and then. I don’t know how much doubt is there for what is coming from these stories, but we got some nice steps on the way there. The show itself wasn’t bad, but this was about the future rather than the present, which worked out about as well as could be expected.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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ECW on Sci Fi
Date: April 3, 2007
Location: Allen County War Memorial, Fort Wayne, Indiana
Attendance: 4,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We are done with Wrestlemania and ECW actually had more than a bit of a presence. Not only did ECW World Champion Bobby Lashley take out Umaga so Vince McMahon could be shaved bald, but the ECW Originals beat the New Breed in the big eight man tag. Neither seems to be over though so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results is you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Bobby Lashley to talk about how big a night Wrestlemania was for him. Everyone is talking about the Battle of the Billionaires and we see some shots of Vince McMahon being shaved at Wrestlemania. We also see Lashley taking Vince’s hat last night on Raw, leaving Vince to hide his bald head under various things, including Lilian Garcia’s skirt. Lashley knows Vince is coming to end his title reign, so bring it on.

We look at the Condemned movie premiere in Detroit, which is the largest premiere of the century or whatever their latest title is.

CM Punk vs. Stevie Richards

Punk goes with a hammerlock into a headlock to start and Richards is in early trouble. Richards gets smart by going after Punk’s taped up ribs and a suplex gets two. We pause so Richards can mock the X pose before Punk grabs the abdominal stretch. Richards gets a bit too cocky though and charges into a knee to the face. The ribs are too banged up for Punk to try a suplex so he strikes away at Richards’ face instead. The (first time ever) officially named GTS finishes Richards.

Rating: C-. Richards always had some energy to him in these matches, even if he had a complete lack of a chance of winning anything. Punk gets back to winning after the Money in the Bank loss and that should be part of his way up towards the main event, either around here or elsewhere. ECW isn’t keeping Punk for long, so they should get what they can out of him while they can.

Rob Van Dam is in the back with Timbaland (music producer) and pleasantries are exchanged. Van Dam leaves and Extreme Expose comes in to suggest they get a spot in his new music video. Timbaland seems intrigued.

Matt Striker and Marcus Cor Von offer CM Punk a spot in the New Breed. Punk says no, but Cor Von says you’re with us or against us.

Extreme Expose.

Wrestlemania music video.

Snitsky vs. Hardcore Holly

Holly slugs away to start and gets knocked into the corner for the hammering/choking. The big elbows set up some stomping but Holly gets a foot up in the corner. A suplex is countered into a failed Alabama Slam attempt and Snitsky kicks him in the face for the easy pin.

Post match, Snitsky unloads on Holly with a chair and crushes it in the steps for some hard chair shots. That’s certainly an injury angle to get Holly off of TV for a staph infection.

Hall of Fame induction ceremony video.

New Breed vs. ECW Originals

Extreme Rules, which was going to happen sooner or later. We’re joined in progress with Sabu dropping Striker to set up the one armed camel clutch and everything breaks down in a hurry. The weapons are brought in to clear out the New Breed, meaning it’s time for some dives. Dreamer whips Striker into a trashcan in the corner but Cor Von gets in a cheap shot so the New Breed can take over.

The rest of the Originals are held outside but Dreamer manages a DDT/neckbreaker combination to get a breather. Now the rest of the Originals can come back in to clean house with Sabu getting two on Striker. Burke knocks a swinging Sandman down without much effort but Dreamer hits the baseball slide into the chair into Striker’s face in the Tree of Woe. Sandman cleans house with the kendo stick but Cor Von is back up to suplex Dreamer onto an open chair.

There’s the Pounce to send Dreamer outside so Sabu comes back in to throw a chair at Cor Von’s head. Van Dam slips out of a Razor’s Edge through a table and rolls Thorn up for two. Ariel crotches Van Dam on top but Sabu makes another save. Van Dam and Sabu drive Thorn through the table at the same time but the Van Dam is sent outside. The Elijah Express sends Sabu through a table in the corner though and Burke gets the pin.

Rating: B. This was actually a heck of a sprint and that is what this should have been. Once they came back from the break, this was a pretty awesome match with all eight guys working hard and beating each other up. Odds are this sets up a tables match at Extreme Rules for the big blowoff, though the Punk factor is going to be interesting as well.

Overall Rating: B-. The main event carried the thing, though the rest of the show was little more than a way to have a breather after Wrestlemania. That’s all they needed to do here and it worked quite well, mainly due to one match. Sometimes you need to see something hard hitting and fun, which is what we got on this show. Nice job, though it’s more of a stand alone episode than anything else.

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ECW on Sci Fi
Date: March 13, 2007
Location: Sovereign Bank Arena, Trenton, New Jersey
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Wrestlemania is on the way and ECW will actually be doing something on the show. Not only will CM Punk be in Money in the Bank, but we get the big eight man tag between the New Breed and the ECW Originals. That alone should be more than enough to carry ECW TV, but this week gets a bonus with a special appearance by Mick Foley. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory Of Ernie Ladd.

Edge is in the back when Randy Orton comes up to yell at him for setting up Orton vs. Bobby Lashley tonight. Orton says Edge is kissing up to Vince McMahon and tensions are rather high.

Opening sequence.

Battle Royal

Tommy Dreamer, Rob Van Dam, Sabu, Sandman, Marcus Cor Von, Matt Striker, Kevin Thorn, Elijah Burke

The teams come out together but it’s one winner only. It’s a brawl to start (as it should be) with Sandman hammering on Striker in the corner. The posing is a bit too much though and Striker tosses him out without much effort. Sabu and Van Dam get rid of Cor Von, which probably should have been a bigger deal. Thorn blocks Sabu’s hurricanrana to toss him out as the eliminations are starting fast.

Van Dam kicks away at Thorn, including the step over kick to put him down. Striker cuts Van Dam off though as we’re into the everyone brawls without tossing anyone stage. A kick to the face rocks Thorn and some clotheslines get rid of him but Striker is right behind him to toss Van Dam as well.

We’re down to Striker, Burke and Dreamer, the latter of whom has to fight out of the corner. For some reason Striker charges at Dreamer in the corner and gets backdropped out, leaving us with Burke vs. Dreamer. Burke dropkicks him off the top but Dreamer hangs on and gets up on the apron. Back in and Dreamer blocks a big boot and shoves Burke out to win (with the Originals being announced as the winners).

Rating: C-. They kept this moving fast enough and that’s always appreciated in a battle royal with so many losers. Dreamer winning is a good idea as you need to give someone other than Van Dam some momentum in the feud and it’s not like losing in a battle royal is some kind of career death sentence. This feud is more than enough to carry ECW for the time being and this was a fine way to go for the week.

Post match the Originals all get back inside and here is Mick Foley. Post break, Foley says you might think that he is here for a cheap pop…..and you would be exactly right! He is here to talk about his new book, but he is also here to talk about Wrestlemania. Foley talks about turning on Tommy Dreamer last year and it made him unpopular with some of the boys.

Yes he is here to talk about his book because he has never been so honest before. He talks about everyone and everything in it and he wants Dreamer to look at it. Dreamer drops the book but Foley talks about how he turned on Dreamer last year. Yeah he loves the pop and the crowd reaction but One Night Stand meant so much to him that he wanted to shine the spotlight on Dreamer.

Sabu deserves the attention as well and that’s why we are getting to Wrestlemania. It is time for the Originals to face the New Breed in front of 70,000 people. Foley never got to do that and he is going to make it 70,001 by being at Wrestlemania in the stands. He will somehow squeeze into a seat and let his voice be heard as he chants ECW. The chant starts up again….at least a little bit. This was Foley trying as hard as he could to get an idea over but it is only going to get so far when it’s ECW in 2007.

Video on Snitsky.

Extreme Expose….is cut off by Snitsky.

Snitsky vs. Michael Deek/Danny Jacks

Total destruction, with Snitsky pinning Deek after a big boot in about forty seconds.

Elijah Burke wants CM Punk’s answer about joining the New Breed. Punk isn’t ready to answer but Burke asks him about his bad night on Smackdown. That’s not cool with Punk, but Burke wants to make sure Wrestlemania is a good night for Punk. Just think about it, and Burke hands him a New Breed shirt.

Celebrities offer their hair cut picks.

Long video on the Battle of the Billionaires contract signing from Raw.

Bobby Lashley vs. Randy Orton

Non-title and Edge comes out to watch. Lashley powers him into the corner to start but Orton gets smart by taking out the leg. A chop block puts Lashley down and the knee drop keeps him in trouble. Back up and Lashley sends him outside where Edge yells at Orton as we take a break.

We come back with Orton holding Lashley in a Boston crab, meaning it’s time to crawl to the rope. Orton stomps away but Lashley fights up, earning himself a poke to the eye to cut him off again. The RKO is blocked so Edge grabs the title, which is enough for an ejection. Edge seems rather happy as Orton yells at him and we take another break.

Back again with Orton hitting a suplex on the floor for a near fall, followed by the Orton Stomp. Another Boston crab goes on, with Orton being smart enough to face the ropes this time. Orton even bends forward to push onto the ropes….which I’m assuming adds some kind of extra pressure in heel logic.

Lashley gets out and the fans are not pleased with anything about Orton. They are a bit more appreciative of Orton being sent shoulder first into the post and getting torture racked. Lashley drops to his knees for the backbreaker and it’s time to unload in the corner. The running powerslam finishes Orton clean in a pretty flat ending.

Rating: C. The ending really sucked the life out of this one, which is impressive as it didn’t have a ton of life in the first place. Lashley has all of the tools you could need but he really isn’t feeling it in the ring with these matches. It wasn’t so much a hot comeback as much as Lashley hit a few moves and then won with his finisher. Not bad, but it got a very big “that’s it?”.

Vince McMahon, looking snazzy in a black pinstripe suit with a black tie, comes out to glare at Lashley to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Not their best show here, but what matters is they have something big to focus on with the faction warfare. The problem is I’m not sure what the rest of the show is going to do when Lashley is out of the real Wrestlemania main event slot. The show wasn’t great, but it kept things moving, albeit fairly slowly, on the way to Wrestlemania.

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ECW on Sci Fi
Date: January 30, 2007
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 15,156
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re done with the Royal Rumble and the big story around here is Bobby Lashley beating Test (again), this time via countout. That isn’t much to go on, but there is something more important around here as Vince McMahon is bringing his Fan Appreciation Night here as well. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Vince McMahon arrives and runs into Marquis Cor Von. McMahon seems to be a fan, calling him a breath of fresh air. Cor Von approves and McMahon goes on to find Sandman, who is reading the paper (no). That’s ok, but DRINKING ON THE JOB isn’t. McMahon remembers that he’s the Sandman and asks asks how he got that name. This sends McMahon into a chorus of Mr. Sandman as we flash back to Back To The Future.

Opening sequence.

CM Punk vs. Matt Striker

Striker forearms away to start but gets leg lariated in the face. There’s a clothesline to the floor and Punk follows him outside for the kicks to the chest. Back in and Striker kicks the rope into Punk’s chest, setting up a hanging swinging neckbreaker for two. The chinlock goes on (with Punk looking like he’s tapping) until Punk makes the comeback you are probably picturing. The powerslam into the running knee in the corner into the bulldog has Striker in more trouble. A backbreaker gives Punk two and he tries a sunset flip, only to have Striker drop down and grab the rope for the pin.

Rating: C-. Punk taking pins, even via cheating, still doesn’t feel right and hopefully it isn’t something that happens very often. He is one of the biggest hopes for the future and while this is far from some career killer, it wasn’t exactly something that seems to be the best idea, especially for Striker of all people.

We look at Undertaker winning the Royal Rumble and showing up on Raw to tease challenging John Cena at Wrestlemania.

Vince McMahon runs into Tommy Dreamer and asks what kind of a name is Dreamer. What could anyone be dreaming about? Dreamer: “Are you serious?” McMahon: “No, I’m Vince.”

Rob Van Dam vs. Hardcore Holly

They trade hammerlocks to start until Rob kicks him down. A hurricanrana drops Holly again and there’s a kick to the face for two more. The Alabama Slam is broken up and Van Dam hits a superkick, only to get caught with a running clothesline. A backdrop puts Holly on the floor and the big running dive takes him down again.

We take a break and come back with Van Dam kicking him down and dropping the spinning leg for two. It’s time to go up, meaning Holly can shove him down onto the barricade for a big crash. Back in and the reverse chinlock goes on but Van Dam jawbreaks his way to freedom. Holly kicks him down again and chokes on the rope, setting up the kick to the very lower abdomen for two. The chinlock goes on but this time Van Dam breaks away to hit the running spinwheel kick.

There’s the monkey flip out of the corner into the running kick to the face in the corner. The top rope kick to the head sets up Rolling Thunder but Holly powerbombs him out of the corner for two. Holly goes up top for a change and gets crotched down, only to shove Van Dam down. Van Dam hits a spinning kick to the face but misses the Five Star. Holly’s back gives out on the Alabama Slam attempt but he sends Van Dam into the corner, setting up the Alabama Slam for the pin.

Rating: C. There is something strange about seeing Holly winning a match over Van Dam, as it isn’t like this show has the strongest top of the card in WWE. Hopefully they come up with someone else soon, because I don’t think Holly is the right choice. The match got some time and was good enough, but Van Dam losing to Holly is weird.

Vince McMahon runs into Sabu, making him think he’s in Afghanistan. Vince: “It’s a member of the Taliban!” Sabu needs to stay away from him.

Post break, Vince McMahon runs into Balls Mahoney. He likes the last name, but not so much the first name.

Extreme Expose. This goes on for a bit until Vince McMahon, with security, breaks it up. The women are happy to see him but Vince throws them out of his ring. Security is tossed as well and Vince promises to not be embarrassed like he was last night. This is his first time in an ECW ring and he thinks all of the ECW originals suck. Actually anything about the original ECW sucks, including the people who liked it.

What we need around here are athletes with charisma rather than a bunch of drunken suicidal misfits. We need someone like this man, so here is Elijah Burke, who is rather pleased to be here. After a photo opportunity, Burke talks about how all of his fans are saying amen. The fans call this boring but Burke promises that everyone is going to feel his wrath. Cue the ECW Originals to beat Burke down as Vince is annoyed. The beatdown takes a good while, including Sabu putting Burke through a table.

ECW World Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Test

Lashley is defending and this is their third match in eight days. Test gets kicked out to the floor to start but manages to post Lashley. More posting ensues and we take an early break. Back with Test working on the arm he injured during the commercial, including a flying armbar. Lashley manages to post him before the arm can be sent into the post again to get an opening. Some running clotheslines and a running shoulder in the corner set up the delayed vertical suplex. Test misses the big boot and gets caught with an exploder suplex. The running powerslam retains the title.

Rating: D+. Somehow that might be the most competitive of their matches. I know Test was on his way out, but I didn’t need to see this match happen three times in eight days. Lashley dominated him throughout the series and that doesn’t make for the most interesting string of matches. At least they kept it short.

Post match Lashley celebrates but the gong sounds. Cue the Undertaker to stare Lashley down, take out Test for daring to try to interfere, and then look at the ECW Title. Joey is SURE this means Undertaker vs. Lashley at Wrestlemania.

Overall Rating: C-. You can tell that it’s Wrestlemania season as WWE is actually trying to do something for a change. Having Vince around to set up something big with the Originals vs. the new ECW is the kind of thing that could go on for a long way around here. Undertaker isn’t likely to be back around here, but at least they gave us a little tease.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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