Impact Wrestling – July 13, 2023: Land This Thing

Impact Wrestling
Date: July 13, 2023
Location: Center Stage, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

Slammiversary is this weekend and that means it is time for the hard sell show. Impact has done well with these in recent months and it would be nice to see them do it here for one of their biggest shows of the year. Alex Shelley vs. Nick Aldis is likely going to get a lot of the focus so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

With Steve Maclin injured, Bully Ray has selected Deaner as his replacement for the Slammiversary tag match.

Zachary Wentz vs. Chris Bey

Trey Miguel and Ace Austin are here too. Feeling out process to start with Wentz taking him into the corner for some screaming. Wentz gets taken to the mat for a stomp to the back but Bey is sent crashing out to the floor. Bey fights out of an arm crank and runs Wentz over in the corner, setting up the kick to the head. A Code Red gives Bey two but Miguel superkicks Austin. The distraction lets Wentz do….something (commentary wasn’t sure either) and a headlock driver finishes Bey at 6:44.

Rating: C+. This was Wentz’s return to the spotlight and he looked fine enough out there. Granted the Rascalz were always more of a team than individuals in Impact so seeing Wentz on his own was a little strange. The good thing is that this does not seem to add the Rascalz to the Tag Team Title match, which already has enough challengers.

Dirty Dango attacked Santino Marella on BTI.

Santino and Scott D’Amore were in the back when the Rascalz pop in to say they want in the Tag Team Title match. That seems to be a no so the annoyed Rascalz leave.

Kevin Knight vs. Mike Bailey

They start slow until Bailey snaps off a headlock takeover. Back up and Bailey armdrags him into an armbar but Knight armdrags his way to freedom. A splash gives Knight two but he misses a springboard crossbody. Bailey sends him outside for the middle rope moonsault and we take a break. Back with Knight knocking him to the floor and hitting a dive of his own as we take a break.

We come back with Bailey in trouble but he manages a faceplant to take over. The moonsault knees connect but Knight jumps to the top for one heck of a superplex. They go to the pinfall reversal sequence for two each until Knight grabs a sitout spinebuster for two. Back up and Bailey sends him into the corner for the tornado kick into the Ultimate Weapon to finish Knight at 13:30.

Rating: C+. It continues to amaze me how much better Bailey is when he reels things in. He is capable of doing some great athletic stuff and making it look effortless, and as long as he doesn’t get to ignore a knee injury, he’s quite good. Knight is someone I’ve seen multiple times now and he has something, but he has to be around for a bit for anything to take hold.

Masha Slamovich and Killer Kelly are ready to take the Knockouts Tag Team Titles from the Coven.

Here is Joe Hendry for a chat. He’s here to help people, such as Stripper Kenny. For tonight, he and his partner can help take care of King.

Joe Hendry/Yuya Uemura vs. Kenny King/Sheldon Jean

The fans tell King, wearing a sweatshirt, to take it off as he starts with Henry. Uemura and Jean come in, with the former grabbing some headlock takeovers. Jean takes Uemura into the corner and the double stomping is on. That’s broken up with a kick to the head and Uemura gets over to Hendry for the tag.

House is quickly cleaned including a fall away slam into a nipup, followed by an RKO to King. Hendry even TAKES OFF THE SWEATSHIRT, leaving King embarrassed. The shirt is thrown at him (setting up an argument about whether that’s a foreign object) so King leaves, meaning it’s an enziguri into the Standing Ovation to finish Jean at 5:33.

Rating: C+. Sweet goodness Hendry is fun. There’s something about him that makes you want to watch whatever he is doing and it works every time. I’m not sure how high he’ll go in Impact, but that smile and that charisma make you want to see what he is doing. Mocking King for being a former stripper is bit of a stretch, but dang if Hendry isn’t trying to make it work.

Flashback Moment Of The Week: Chris Sabin wins the X-Division Title at Slammiversary 2013.

Lio Rush is ready to win the X-Division Title.

Chris Sabin knows Rush is very talented, but he gets why Rush isn’t wanted in any locker room.

Moose/Brian Myers vs. Sami Callihan/Rich Swann

Swann kicks Myers around to start before Callihan comes in for some shots to the face. A rake to the eyes allows Moose to come in but it’s way too early for the powerbomb. Instead Callihan low bridges him to the floor, where Swann flip dives onto both of them as the villains are in early trouble. Back in and Moose knocks both of them to the floor as we take a break.

We come back with Swann fighting out of a chinlock and rolling Moose up for two, only to get dropped hard. A kick to the head allows Swann to get over to Callihan for the hot tag, meaning house can be cleaned. Everything breaks down and Myers kicks Moose in the face by mistake. Swann cutters Myers but Moose shoves Callihan into them to break up the cover. A 450 gives Swann two with Moose managing a kickout without a save. Myers pulls Swann out and the distraction lets Moose hit a low blow. The spear finishes Callihan at 13:58.

Rating: C. That’s the right way to go, as you need Myers and Moose to feel like a threat. They certainly have the talent between them, but at some point they have to actually win some matches. This was a good start, though I’m not sure how likely they are to win the titles at Slammiversary. Granted the same could be said about Swann and Callihan, but they have a bit more history together.

Subculture is ready to win the Tag Team Titles for the people who don’t fit in.

Angels is ready to win the X-Division Title.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Video on Nick Aldis, who wants the World Title back. Alex Shelley knows where the title will wind up and he can give it up on his face or on his back.

Here is Deonna Purrazzo to say people have forgotten who she is so it’s Champ Champ Challenge time.

Knockouts Title: Deonna Purrazzo vs. Jody Threat

Threat is challenging and gets taken down with a headlock takeover to start. Back up and Threat fires off some corner clotheslines for two but Purrazzo knocks her right back down. The stomping keeps Threat down and we take a break. We come back with Purrazzo working on the arm and hitting a knee to the face. A Russian legsweep sets up the Fujiwara armbar, sending Threat over to the rope.

Threat gets in a shot of her own and it’s a double knockdown for a breather. Back up and Threat snaps off a suplex before forearming Purrazzo in the jaw. A top rope cannonball sets up a hard clothesline for two but the F Bomb is broken up. Purrazzo pulls her into the Fujiwara armbar but Threat rolls out again. Threat plants her down for two but the F Bomb is countered into the Venus de Milo to retain the title at 9:17.

Rating: C+. Threat isn’t someone who feels like a top star, but she hadn’t lost until now and that made her more of a realistic possibility to take the title. At the same time, Purrazzo won a match she should have won. This was a match that was put together well and Purrazzo had to work to get the win, so nice stuff all around.

Post match Savannah Evans, Gisele Shaw and Jai Vidal come in for the beatdown so here are the Death Dollz to even things up. Cue Masha Slamovich and Killer Kelly, followed by Trinity to make it an even bigger brawl. Referees try to break it up, leaving Trinity vs. Purrazzo in the big staredown to end the show.

A long Slammiversary preview wraps it up.

Scott D’Amore is on the phone and says this time PCO can’t come back to life, so he wants to know if the person on the phone can. D’Amore grabs a Team Canada jacket to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Not the best show this week but it more or less held things in place as we get to Slammiversary this weekend. Ending things with the women was an interesting choice as that’s a big match that hasn’t gotten a ton of attention. What matters is Slammiversary is set and if Impact can make everything work, we should be in for a heck of a pay per view.

Results
Zachary Wentz b. Chris Bey – Headlock driver
Mike Bailey b. Kevin Knight – Ultimate Weapon
Joe Hendry/Yuya Uemura b. Kenny King/Sheldon Jean – Standing Ovation to Jean
Moose/Brian Myers b. Sami Callihan/Rich Swann – Spear to Moose
Deonna Purrazzo b. Jody Threat – Venus de Milo

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – July 6, 2023: That’s A Hot One

Impact Wrestling
Date: July 6, 2023
Location: Center Stage, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We are just over a week away from Slammiversary and the card is all but set. Oddly enough, one of the better built matches has been Scott D’Amore/PCO vs. Bully Ray/Steve Maclin, as the videos on D’Amore have been great. On top of that, there is also a new alliance in the form of Nick Aldis and Lio Rush, who are going after the Motor City Machine Guns. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Eddie Edwards vs. Frankie Kazarian

Alisha Edwards is here with Eddie and shouts at Kazarian, even as he suplexes Eddie into a neckbreaker to start. A fisherman’s suplex gives Kazarian two but Eddie manages to send him outside, where Alisha gets in a tornado DDT. Back in and Eddie rakes the eyes and chops in the corner, allowing Alisha to choke away.

Kazarian is sent to the apron where Alisha gets in another cheap shot, allowing Eddie to hit a clothesline. A slingshot DDT plants Eddie on the apron though and it’s a double down on the floor. Back in and Kazarian counters the Blue Thunder Bomb into a failed chickenwing so it’s an Unprettier for two on Eddie instead.

Another chickenwing attempt is blocked and Eddie grabs the tiger driver for two of his own. The chickenwing finally goes on but Alisha offers a distraction, allowing Eddie to drive it into the corner, with the referee getting bumped in the process. Alisha kendo sticks Kazarian from behind though and the Boston Knee Party finishes for Eddie at 10:46.

Rating: B-. Well yeah of course this was good. They’re both talented wrestlers and they have a story going. Giving them some time to put a match together is going to work and it went well here. You can probably pencil in some kind of a mixed tag for Slammiversary and that opens up more than a few options.

We look back at Nick Aldis and Lio Rush laying out the Motor City Machine Guns. That’s your main event tonight.

Chris Sabin is ready to face Rush for the X-Division Title at Slammiversary.

Rush says he’s here to win titles instead of making friends. Nick Aldis comes in to say he’s here to make history, and they can accomplish these things together. As long as Rush stays out of Aldis’ way.

Frankie Kazarian congratulates Eddie Edwards on the win, even if that’s not how Killer Kowalski taught them. They’re 1-1 so let’s have the rubber match at Slammiversary, with Kazarian offering to bring his wife, Traci Brooks, to even things up.

Champagne Singh/Shera vs. Rich Swann/Sami Callihan

Swann get double teamed down to start and Singh drops him with a Downward Spiral for some trash talk. Swann trips him down though and it’s back to Callihan to pick up the pace. This includes the always stupid throw a team together and make someone DDT his partner spot. Swann comes back in for a double superkick to Singh, meaning it’s the Cactus Driver to finish Singh at 3:16.

Rating: C. Not much beyond a squash here but it’s good to have Callihan and Swann look like a solid team on the way towards Slammiversary. They’re long established as friends and have teamed together, but rarely as a two on two team. Beating up Singh and Shera is always fun too, and it worked well here.

Moose and Brian Myers are ready to give Callihan and Swann real competition.

We look at Santino Marella yelling at Dirty Dango, allowing Heath to jump Dango from behind.

Dirty Dango talks about how he loved wrestling in the 90s (Juventud Guerrera, Villano IV, Villano VII, people like that) but then he realized that things change when you get into the arena. Go back to school instead of wrestling. As for Santino Marella, Dango has grown up while Santino is still stuck in 2010. Dango: “It’s like going to a Yoko Ono concert where she just yodels the whole time.” As for Heath…..maybe try being a fork lift driver?

Angels vs. Jonathan Gresham

The Design is here with Angels, who is quickly sent outside. Deaner yells at Angels to do what he says so he goes back in and suplexes Gresham. A running dropkick sends Angels outside though and we take a break. Back with Gresham dropping him again for two and they fight over a suplex. A half and half suplex sends Gresham into the corner so Angels can hammer away, which doesn’t seem to be following Deaner’s plan. They fight over some rollups for two each until Gresham pulls him into the Octopus for the tap at 10:27.

Rating: C+. The idea here was Angels trying to pay attention to Deaner and do his own thing with neither exactly working. Beating Gresham is hard enough on its own and he did his whole technical wrestling master deal. If nothing else, it’s better than the same stuff the Design was doing with Sami Callihan for months, so hopefully this leads to the team falling apart and going away for good.

Post match Gresham offers a handshake but Deaner doesn’t want Angels to do it. Angels teases leaving but goes back in, with Deaner breaking up the handshake attempt. Deaner pokes him in the chest so Angels grabs his hand and then shakes Gresham’s hand.

The Bullet Club is ready to defend the titles against anyone, including three teams at Slammiversary. The Rascalz come in and want to be in he match, but Chris Bey says they haven’t won anything around here. Wentz suggests a match with Bey, and if Wentz wins, they’re in the title match. Seems to be a deal.

Video on the Australia shows. Good for them for getting to go somewhere else, as they’ve turned things around so much in the last few years.

We recap the issues between Deonna Purrazzo, Trinity and Gisele Shaw.

Trinity thanks Purrazzo for having her back last week. Purrazzo says she wants Trinity 100% when she beats her at Slammiversary and that’s not cool with Trinity. Purrazzo is willing to put out the open challenge next week to show Trinity who she’s facing at Slammiversary.

PCO vs. Good Hands

Scott D’Amore joins commentary. Before the match, the Good Hands talk about how PCO is about to feel these good hands. PCO beats them to the floor to start and hits the big running flip dive. The Deanimator hits Hotch and a reverse DDT plants Skyler back inside. The PCOsault finishes Skyler at 1:56.

Post match Hotch goes after D’Amore and gets beaten up for his efforts, including a Sky High. The Canadian Destroyer is loaded up but here is Bully Ray to interrupt. Steve Maclin sneaks in from behind though and the villains wreck PCO and D’Amore with a chair. D’Amore gets handcuffed to the rope and PCO gets destroyed even worse, including being put through a chair.

PCO gets thrown down a ramp into the backstage area. After yelling at D’Amore some more, they follow PCO outside and pour…..battery acid into PCO’s mouth. Then they add lighter fluid and light him on fire. This went on for a LONG time and while the ending looked cool, it was hard to keep interest all the way there.

Post break, we look back at what we just saw.

Scott D’Amore is looking at PCO, who doesn’t know how the Slammiversary match is affected and really doesn’t care.

Gisele Shaw vs. Courtney Rush

Jai Vidal, Savannah Evans and Jessicka are here too. Shaw runs her over to start so Rush grabs a top wristlock. Rush sends her outside for a breather, followed by a reverse DDT for two back inside. Vidal offers a distraction though and Shaw gets in a kick to the head to start the comeback. A suplex gives Shaw two and frustration is setting in. Rush knocks her away but Evans offers a distraction. Jessicka slugs her down but gets sent into the steps. Vidal gets on the apron as well and that’s enough of a distraction for Shaw to grab a rollup with feet on the ropes for the pin at 6:13.

Rating: C. Shaw gets another win as the numbers game is too much for Rush and Jessicka. It wouldn’t surprise me to see Shaw accept Deonna Purrazzo’s challenge next week, though adding her to the title match at Slammiversary at this point doesn’t feel likely. So far the new Death Dollz haven’t been doing so well but their whole huge story has had so many twists and turns that something is going to come from all of it.

Kenny King and Sheldon Jean are interrupted by a random fan who has no business being backstage. She tries to put money in King’s pants, and another woman does the same. Then Joe Hendry pops up and produces Yuya Uemura to prevent a 2-1 beatdown. The villains leave.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Motor City Machine Guns vs. Lio Rush/Nick Aldis

Sabin wants Rush to start but gets Aldis instead. Aldis easily wins an exchange of shoulders and elbows Sabin in the face for a bonus. Rush comes in and starts the dodging, setting up a jumping kick to the head. We hit the rear naked choke but Sabin slips out and slides outside to trip Aldis. Shelley uses the distraction to jump Rush from behind and Sabin gets two off a double stomp.

The abdominal stretch keeps Rush in trouble and Shelley knocks him outside. This time Aldis gets in a cheap shot on Shelley and we take a break. Back with Aldis clotheslining Shelley and stomping away a bit more. Aldis starts in on the leg and Rush comes in for some right hands of his own. Rush chokes in the corner and the bodyscissors goes on. It’s back to Aldis for a chinlock but Shelley fights up with a Downward Spiral into the corner.

The tag brings in Sabin to clean house, including a middle rope missile dropkick to Rush. Everything breaks down and a Magic Killer of all things gets two on Rush. Aldis is taken down with a dragon screw legwhip over the ropes, with Rush taking one of his own. The Guns go after Aldis, allowing Rush to hit a big running flip dive to take everyone out. Aldis adds a top rope elbow for two but Rush misses the final Hour.

There’s the Dream Sequence to Rush and a cutter drops Aldis. The powerbomb/sliding cutter hits Rush for two with Aldis making the save. Aldis gets the King’s Lynn Cloverleaf on Shelley, with Sabin making the save. Rush hits Sabin low and kicks him in the head, setting up the Final Hour for the pin at 17:54.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but eventually picked up well. What mattered here was setting up the King vs. Sabin title match at Slammiversary and they covered that well. Aldis vs. Shelley is more or less set up in advance, so this was a good way to make both title matches feel more interesting at the same time.

Overall Rating: B. Another solid show here as Slammiversary has come together rather well and I’m wanting to see the show. The PCO thing was quite over the top but it does kind of fit with how intense the feud has been. In addition to that, the title matches got some nice boosts and nothing is feeling overly weak. Next week is set up for the big go home show and now I’m curious to see what they’re going to do for the big finale. God stuff here, which might as well be the official subtitle as of late.

Results
Eddie Edwards b. Frankie Kazarian – Boston Knee Party
Sami Callihan/Rich Swann b. Champagne Singh/Shera – Cactus Driver to Singh
Jonathan Gresham b. Angels – Octopus
PCO b. Good Hands – PCOsault to Skyler
Gisele Shaw b. Courtney Rush – Rollup with feet on the ropes

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – June 29, 2023: It’s Just Right

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 29, 2023
Location: Center Stage, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We are less than a month away from Slammiversary and that means it is time to start hammering home the card. The big story coming out of last week was the issue between Frankie Kazarian and Eddie Edwards while Bully Ray and Steve Maclin seem to be doing just fine. Throw in Alex Shelley vs. Nick Aldis and we should be in for a big Slammiversary. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Trey Miguel

Sabin, who took the title from Miguel at Against All Odds, is defending. Feeling out process to start with neither being able to get very far until Sabin sends him to the apron. A pull of the leg lets Sabin send Miguel into the apron and we hit the chinlock back inside. Miguel fights up and hits him in the face a few times, only for Sabin to roll away from a moonsault.

Back up and Sabin wins a slugout but Miguel kicks him in the ribs. The Lightning Spiral is broken up and Sabin kicks the knees out in a smart counter. Sabin grabs an STF but Miguel is right there in the ropes. Miguel kicks him down and hits the top rope Meteora but Sabin rolls back into the STF. With that almost broken up, Sabin tries the Cradle Shock but Zachary Wentz (Miguel’s former Rascalz partner) runs in for the DQ at 9:30.

Rating: B-. I wasn’t better on that choice for a run in but I’ll take it over Miguel losing clean again. Miguel had a nice title run but that doesn’t mean you have to beat him into the ground after he loses. The Rascalz, or at least two thirds of them, against the Guns could be worth seeing and it is definitely a change of pace, so well done on a surprise. There is going to be some baggage with Wentz, but some time might have cooled some of it off a bit.

Post match we get the reunion hug and beatdown until Alex Shelley runs in for the save.

Post break the Rascalz say they’re back and coming for the Tag Team Titles.

Trinity vs. Jai Vidal

Gisele Shaw and Savannah Evans are here with Vidal while Deonna Purrazzo is on commentary. Vidal sends her into the corner to start for a slap to the face, only to have Trinity dropkick him into the other corner. A slide into a slap rocks Vidal again so Evans pulls him to the floor. Shaw offers another distraction and Evans gets in a cheap shot for two.

A running elbow gives Vidal two as Purrazzo says she is #1 in the division whether champion or not, but the belt makes the outfits better. Trinity fights up and makes the clothesline comeback, setting up a springboard kick to the face for two. A high crossbody drops Vidal again as Purrazzo talks about which limbs she should go after to slow Trinity down. A hanging faceplant sets up Starstruck to finish Vidal at 5:11.

Rating: C. Trinity gets to beat up a member of Shaw’s team before her big showdown with Purrazzo in a few weeks so the logic makes sense. At the same time, Shaw winning the title in Australia to make the Slammiversary match a triple threat wouldn’t stun me either. It might not be the best idea, but I could see them going in that direction.

Post match the beatdown is on with Purrazzo (eventually) coming in for the save.

Moose and Brian Myers, who have a Tag Team Title shot at Slammiversary (along with two other challenging teams) are ready to win the titles. Moose thinks it’s a guarantee…but calls the Good Hands “dead weight”. Myers says not to worry about it.

On Before The Impact, Zicky Dice, screwy referee, helped Johnny Swinger win a match.

Another referee tells Dice and Swinger that, per Santino Marella, that win doesn’t count and if Dice does it again, he loses his referee’s license. Swinger says they have to work on this.

Lio Rush vs. Jack Price

Somehow this is Rush’s first match on Impact (he’s been on a show co-promoted with New Japan but never just Impact). Rush runs around to start to frustrate Price and then does it again until a jumping enziguri drops Price. A hard shot knocks Rush outside and his hurricanrana is countered. Instead a kick from the apron frustrates Price again, setting up the suicide dive into the barricade. Back in and another kick sets up the Final Hour to finish Price at 3:37.

Rating: C+. If you like the standard Lio Rush match, you’ll like this one. This was his normal stuff with the crazy speed and the kicks, plus the good looking frog splash for the finish. The athleticism has never been an issue for Rush but he has to actually stay somewhere or none of what he can do matters.

Dirty Dango talks about how Santino Marella hit the Cobra out of luck last week because he has no offense. We hear about Jim Cornette slapping Santino around in OVW and he got a job as a result. Now Santino’s daughter is back in the same system and Dango wonders if she’s getting slapped around.

Santino Marella says he’ll take care of Dirty Dango at Slammiversary. Dango questioned his work ethic and what he gave to get here, then he talks about his daughter? Pain is promised. This would have been more effective if Santino hadn’t been doing the whole Santino deal.

Frankie Kazarian yells at Eddie Edwards for last week. He gets that mistakes can happen, but twice in one match? Eddie tries to calm him down but suggests they be opponents instead. Works for Kazarian.

KiLynn King vs. Masha Slamovich

Taylor Wilde is here with King. Slamovich starts fast by kicking her to the floor, only to have her dive cut off. Wilde chokes from the floor, only to have Slamovich roll King up for two. A clothesline gives King two but Slamovich is back with some knees to the chest. More knees and a spinwheel kick give Slamovich two more but King hits a Death Valley Driver for the same. Back up and Slamovich kicks her in the head for another near fall but gets sent outside. Wilde manages a quick posting but cue Killer Kelly to choke Wilde with a chain. Back in and the Snowplow finishes King at 8:10.

Rating: C+. These two beat the fire out of each other and it was a rather fun match as a result. Sometimes you need this kind of a match and it worked well here. You might as well set up the title match at Slammiversary from here, mainly as it isn’t like there are any other viable challengers for the titles at the moment.

Post match Kelly and Slamovich stare each other down until Slamovich ties the chain around her own neck. Then she leads Kelly away by said chain.

Video on Alex Shelley vs. Nick Aldis.

We see a look back at Scott D’Amore’s career. D’Amore talks about how he rose up through the ranks and while he never became a big star, he was trained by some great names over the years. Various stars talk about how good D’Amore was, despite being around some awesome talent. He made a bigger impact as a trainer and coach though and we hear about the success of his students.

We also hear about how many wrestlers D’Amore helped when they had no money etc., with names like Alex Shelley and Kushida praising him. D’Amore says he wasn’t a big star, but he went up and down the road and lasted thirty years in this business. This was a REALLY nice tribute to D’Amore and presented him as a truly good guy who never got his due in wrestling. Fair enough, as he does seem to have been a big deal for a lot of people.

Scott D’Amore hopes he is ready to be back in the ring. The Good Hands come in to challenge him, but D’Amore says he’s wrestling once and that’s it. Instead, he can get them to face PCO next week.

Kenny King vs. Yuya Uemura

Sheldon Jean is here with King. Hold on though as Joe Hendry is in the production truck and says he has some kind of special video prepared. Feeling out process to start until Uemura takes him into the corner for some loud chops. King hides in the corner and a Jean distraction lets King get in a cheap shot to take over.

King kicks him in the chest and grabs a seated abdominal stretch to keep things slow. A spinebuster gives King two but Uemura is right back with a bulldog for the same. Uemura DDTs his way out of a suplex to leave them both down and we take a break. Back with King cutting Uemura off on top but a spinning kick to the head misses. Uemura unloads with forearms until King catches him with the Royal Flush for the pin at 12:10.

Rating: B-. This was exactly what you would expect from a Uemura match as he wrestles well and fights hard but can’t get a win that matters in the slightest. He almost has to be ready to end his excursion but seeing him lose over and over can get more than a bit frustrating. King seems primed for the Digital Media Title shot though and a win like this is a good way to go.

Post match here is Joe Hendry, who thinks King deserves a tribute. As luck would have it, he has a special video about King ready to go! The video looks at his career, but there is one year missing and it was the most successful he has ever been. That would be in 2013, when King was….a male stripper! The fans like the chorus and King is livid.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Here is Nick Aldis to explain his attack at Alex Shelley. Cue Shelley, with Aldis getting on him for superkicking Jimmy Jacobs, making this an UNSAFE working environment. Instead, Shelley can go sit with the fans while Aldis talks. Shelly loves the idea of sitting among the fans so he’ll have a….stand over there with them.

Aldis talks about the ten person tag from a few weeks ago, when Chris Sabin was needing a tag. The only option was for Aldis to come in and clean house, but it had to go to Shelley instead. Aldis isn’t going to have the two of them hold Aldis down because they’ve done that for the last ten years around here. He got to the World Title faster than they did and that is because he represents the good things about wrestling.

The Guns wants to take wrestling to a dark place and that ends at Slammiversary, just like the transitional title reign. Shelley: “OH MY GOD JUST SHUT UP!” Shelley tells him to come out here and shut him up so the fight is on. A posting drops Shelley but Chris Sabin comes in to break up a belt shot. Cue Lio Rush to jump the Guns from behind though and the big beatdown lets the villains hold up the titles to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was exactly what I’m expecting from Impact these days: good action, stories being advanced, but most importantly of all, logic. There is a clear path with these stories and while there are some surprises, they don’t feel so completely out of left field that you’re left wondering if they make sense. The show flows very nicely and it makes things that much easier to watch. Another good show here, and you can see most of Slammiversary already.

Results
Chris Sabin b. Trey Miguel via DQ when Zachary Wentz interfered
Trinity b. Jai Vidal – Starstruck
Lio Rush b. Jack Price – Final Hour
Masha Slamovich b. KiLynn King – Snowplow
Kenny King b. Yuya Uemura – Royal Flush

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Impact Wrestling – June 22, 2023: Please Don’t Do This

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 22, 2023
Location: Ohio Expo Center, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

Things took a turn last week when #1 contender Nick Aldis laid out World Champion Alex Shelley. This adds quite the wrinkle to their upcoming Slammiversary title match and I’m curious to see how all of that goes. Other than that, Scott D’Amore is ready to get his hands on Bully Ray next month. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

OVE vs. Good Hands/Brian Myers

Before the match, Skyler says OVE stands for Ohio vs. Everything. Well he’ll take everything from tooth decay to an IRS audit over Ohio. Crist kicks Skyler down to start and hands it off to Callihan for a double spinebuster. Fulton comes in for a double chokeslam/World’s Strongest Slam combination (that was cool) to take the villains down.

A Myers distraction takes Crist down though and the Good Hands drop a double elbow for two. Myers comes in with a suplex for one and we hit the chinlock. Crist fights up so Skyler comes back in for a slam to cut it off again. A forearm finally gives Crist a breather and he nips up for the tag off to Callihan. Cue Moose to crotch Crist on top so Callihan and Fulton go after him. The distraction lets Myers hit the Roster Cut for the pin at 5:40.

Rating: C+. Rather formula based match here and the ending helps establish Moose and Myers as a team who could be something down the line. OVE feels almost like a blast from the past but they’re good enough for a spot like this. As long as they’re away from the Design, it’s kind of hard to complain that much.

Eddie Edwards comes up to talk to Frankie Kazarian and says Frankie can trust him tonight in their tag match. Kazarian doesn’t quite buy that so Eddie asks what he has to do. Eddie doesn’t need to worry about it but he swears on the grave of Killer Kowalski that he won’t do anything to Kazarian. That’s enough for Frankie, but he doesn’t seem completely convinced.

Sami Callihan is livid when Rich Swann comes up to him in the back. Callihan wants to know where Swann was and Swann says he was busy at Against All Odds. From now on, Swann has his back as his top priority. Callihan approves.

Here is Dirty Dango for a chat. Dango: “Man do I hate professional wrestling.” And that’s it before his match.

Dirty Dango vs. Bhupinder Gujjar

Dango shoulders him over to start and dances a bit, allowing Gujjar to come back up with a shoulder. Some dropkicks put Dango on the floor for a slingshot dive but the Gargoyle spear misses back inside. Dango hits a layout reverse DDT for the pin at 2:00.

Post match Dango grabs a phone and says something we can’t hear. Cue Santino Marella, with Gujjar sending Dango inside for the Cobra.

The Death Dollz run into the returning Nevaeh and aren’t sure if they should trust her. They don’t have much of a choice though, and it’s time to learn the parts of the story they don’t know. Courtney Rush loves an origin story….so the Dollz runs off without her.

Zicky Dice passes his test to become an official referee. The referee giving him his test treats it as a serious deal but Johnny Swinger gets rid of him. Swinger flat out says this is so he can cheat to get his fifty wins.

Mike Bailey/Jonathan Gresham vs. The Design

Gresham comes in off a very early blind tag to dropkick Angels in the back, allowing Bailey to kick him in the face. Kon comes in to wreck both of them though and Angels adds a half and half suplex. We take a break and come back with Gresham getting away to bring Bailey back in for the kicks to Kon. The bouncing kicks set up the kick to the head and a missile dropkick puts Kon down instead.

Kon is fine enough to muscle Bailey up from the mat for a slam though and the Design takes right back over. That doesn’t last long as Gresham comes in for the save, allowing Bailey to armbreaker Angels. With that broken up, Bailey moonsaults onto Kon on the floor. Back in and Bailey gets caught in a super Spanish Fly, but Deaner stops to yell at Angels. The distraction causes Angels to miss his frog splash, allowing Bailey to hit the tornado kick. The Ultimate Weapon finishes Angels at 9:28.

Rating: C+. This match did one important thing and that is getting us closer to the destruction of the Design. The team has LONG outlived its usefulness (which wasn’t much in the first place) and now they finally seem to be going away. Gresham and Bailey were good enough as a team, but I don’t need them becoming the next dream team to go after the titles.

Flashback Moment Of The Week: Magnus (Nick Aldis) beats Jeff Hardy in the Dixieland match to win the World Title on December 18, 2013.

Gisele Shaw and Gail Kim are going to be on the Amazing Race: Canada. We don’t have any clips or anything similar to hype it up, but it’s true.

Trinity isn’t happy with Gisele Shaw getting a Knockouts Title shot on the upcoming Australian tour but she’s fine with the Slammiversary match being a triple threat if it has to be. For now though, she’ll beat up Jai Vidal next week instead.

Nick Aldis has sent in a statement saying he won’t be here tonight due to fear of his own safety. Alex Shelley comes in and doesn’t buy it, saying he wants Aldis here. Aldis will be here next week so Shelley leaves, only to come back with a superkick when interviewer Jimmy Jacobs runs his mouth too much.

Taylor Wilde vs. Killer Kelly

Feeling out process to start and Kelly seems pleased with the thought of violence. A shot to the throat and a pump kick give Kelly two and a running kick to the chest drops Wilde again. King low bridges Kelly to the floor though and Wilde gets to kick away back inside. The surfboard goes on but is broken up just as fast, allowing Kelly to suplex her into the corner. They fight over a rollup for two each until Kelly pulls her into the Killer Klutch. That’s broken up as well so Kelly grabs a rollup for the pin at 5:08.

Rating: C. Nice back and forth match with Kelly getting a win for a change. I could go for her getting a stronger push as she has felt like someone who could go a lot higher rather quickly. For now at least she is getting a win and if she can find a partner, we could have some fresh challengers for the Knockouts Tag Team Titles. They certainly could use some new challengers so that’s certainly an idea.

Post match the beatdown is on but Masha Slamovich comes in to save Kelly. The villains bail and Kelly seems to approve.

We recap Scott D’Amore attacking Bully Ray last week, setting up the tag match with PCO and Steve Maclin at Slammiversary.

D’Amore says he is no longer the president so he takes off the fancy stuff before saying he isn’t what he once was. His prime, if he had one, wasn’t as good as Ray or Maclin, but he coached a lot of people over the years and is a five time Canadian Heavyweight Champion. He’ll break any rule or cross any line, and since he brought Ray into this company, it’s time he took him out. The sleeves are rolled up and now he’s ready for war. Good promo here, as D’Amore sounds like a man who has to do something.

Here is Joe Hendry to say….extraterrestrials have made contact with Earth. It makes sense to do it now because he is Digital Media Champion. Those aliens are trying to say the two most important words: WE BELIEVE.

Digital Media Title: Joe Hendry vs. Yuya Uemura

Hendry is defending and here are Kenny King and Sheldon Jean to interrupt. The former sits in on commentary as Hendry works on a headlock. Some armdrags have Hendry down, causing him to bow in respect. We take a break and come back with the camera on King before looking at Uemura fighting out of a chinlock. A belly to back suplex gives Uemura two but Hendry is back up to strike it out. Hendry rolls through a high crossbody and it’s the Standing Ovation to retain the title at 9:07.

Rating: C. This didn’t have time to get very far as the break and then the camera sitting on King didn’t do it any favors. King vs. Hendry is fine for a likely title feud and it wouldn’t shock me to see King get the title. At some point he has to win something new and the Digital Media Title would work well. As for Uemura, he continues to be a completely fine hand in the ring, though he needs to actually win a few matches at some point before the impact fades.

Slammiversary and Australian shows rundown.

Bully Ray/Steve Maclin vs. Frankie Kazarian/Eddie Edwards

Alisha Edwards is here with Kazarian/Eddie. Maclin and Eddie start things off with Maclin dropping him off a running elbow. Eddie is fine enough to pull him over for a slingshot legdrop from Kazarian. Maclin sends him into the corner where Ray crotches Kazarian against the post and we take a break.

Back with Kazarian being knocked into the corner again as the slow being is on. A suplex gives Maclin two and we hit the reverse chinlock. With that broken up, Eddie comes back in to chop away and a double suplex drops Ray. Eddie’s suicide dive hits Ray and Kazarian’s slingshot hurricanrana takes Maclin down on the floor. Back in and Maclin knocks Eddie to the floor where Ray grabs a chair. Instead Ray chases Alisha off and it’s Maclin chinlocking Eddie again.

An Irish Curse gives Maclin two and Ray comes back in to punch him down. Eddie gets up and crossbodies Maclin for a double knockdown. The tag brings in Kazarian to pick up the pace as everything breaks down. Kazarian drops Maclin for two as Eddie and Ray come in (sans tags) to rake each others’ eyes. Ray shoves Eddie into Kazarian, who is right back with the chickenwing. Eddie is back up and accidentally superkicks Kazarian, allowing Maclin and Ray to hit a belly to back neckbreaker for the pin at 15:31.

Rating: B-. Nice enough main event here, and I kind of like having the teams who don’t like each other not being able to win their first match against each a team of former World Champions. Eddie vs. Kazarian should be a fun match at Slammiversary assuming that is the way they go. Other than that, we had a back and forth match with the action doing well, though it never quite got to that next level.

The winners are happy and the losers aren’t to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The main event helped but this show wasn’t quite up to the standards of the usual stuff they do around here. Slammiversary is about three weeks away and you can see a lot of the card from here, though that doesn’t make it the most interesting. The lack of Aldis after last week’s big turn didn’t help either and it wasn’t the most interesting offering as a result. It’s not bad, but more of a skippable show than usual this week.

Results
Brian Myers/Good Hands b. OVE – Roster Cut to Crist
Dirty Dango b. Bhupinder Gujjar – Layout reverse DDT
Jonathan Gresham/Mike Bailey b. The Design – Ultimate Weapon to Angels
Killer Kelly b. Taylor Wilde – Rollup
Joe Hendry b. Yuya Uemura – Standing Ovation
Bully Ray/Steve Maclin b. Frankie Kazarian/Eddie Edwards – Belly to back neckbreaker to Kazarian

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – June 15, 2023: They Talk A Lot

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 15, 2023
Location: Ohio Expo Center, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We’re done with Against All Odds and my goodness things went nuts. First of all, Alex Shelley actually won the World Title from Steve Maclin in a heck of a surprise. If that’s not enough for the Motor City Machine Guns, Chris Sabin won the X-Division Title from Trey Miguel, cementing them as maybe the best tag team Impact has ever had. Nick Aldis is waiting for Shelley at Slammiversary so let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Against All Odds.

Here are the Motor City Machine Guns to a heck of a reception. Chris Sabin talks about how he had a dream that the two of them went into Against All Odds and came out with the gold. Not tag team gold as you might expect, but instead he won the X-Division Title and Alex Shelley won the World Title. Then Sabin realized that it was a dream come true. Shelley: “Yup.” Shelley talks about how he ugly cried when he won the title because he was finally good enough to win the big one.

When he mentors someone, they become World Champions, like Kazuchika Okada, Trey Miguel, Kushida, the Young Bucks, Seth Rollins or Jay White. At some point though, it needed to be his turn and he had to prove it to himself. Now he can say he is a World Champion and he did it because of the fans, everyone in the locker room, everyone in New Japan, everyone in Ring Of Honor and people like Sabin. Shelley: “Ask me if I’m a World Champion.” Sabin: “My friend, my brother, are you a World Champion?” Shelley: “Yup.”

This is the Machine Gun Era, but here is Nick Aldis to interrupt. Aldis says the two of them did it at Against All Odds and he was one of those people who was there cheering for Shelley when it was his night. He’s proud of Shelley and yes, Shelley deserves the title. When Aldis first got here, he was drowning and was going to be on a list of “remember that guy” names. Then Shelley pulled him up, so you can add his name to the list of World Champions that Shelley mentored.

Aldis kept climbing though, and now it’s the two of them for the World Title, and no matter who wins, there will be a World Champion that this company will be proud of. As Shelley’s friend though, Aldis is going to do everything he can to make sure it’s him. Cue Trey Miguel to interrupt because he isn’t happy with the lack of respect. Sabin invites him in to say this to his face, but Miguel turns him down.

Cue Kenny King and Sheldon Jean, with King saying Miguel is the only one out here telling any truth. King accuses the three guys in the ring of jumping the line and getting a bunch of shots, so Sabin invites the other three in to see what happens. The villains come towards the ring but cue Gisele Shaw/Savannah Evans/Jai Vidal of all people to interrupt. Shaw says the spotlight should be on her and asks Shelley if he deserves all of this. Shelley: “Yup.” He thinks her problem is with Trinity so here is Trinity to interrupt.

Vidal threatens Trinity, who threatens him right back, so here id Deonna Purrazzo to interrupt. Purrazzo says she now has over 500 days as Knockouts Champions so she should be in the World Champion discussion. Trinity: “Until Slammiversary.” Cue Santino Marella to make the big ten person tag match for later tonight. This took about twenty minutes and it’s been happening more recently around here. Please don’t be the new norm, because it’s way too WWE instead of Impact.

Steve Maclin is livid about his loss and shouts that he should still be the World Champion. He shoves the camera away.

We look at Sami Callihan hitting Deaner in the face with a baseball bat and piledriving him onto a barbed wire board to beat him at Against All Odds.

Deaner wants to know who should be blamed for the Design’s loss. That would be Angels, who doesn’t like being bossed around this much. He has done everything Deaner has asked, and then Deaner (accidentally) hit him in the face with a baseball bat at Against All Odds. It was Deaner’s fault that they lost so the argument is on. Kon says this is exactly what Callihan wants so they need to get it together. Cool. Just do it on another show.

Moose vs. Rich Swann

Swann tries to move around to start but gets sent into the corner a few times. Some dropkicks stagger Moose a bit and a middle rope version staggers him even more. The low bridge sends Moose outside but he pulls a dive out of the air and powerbombs Swann onto the apron. Moose doesn’t let him go though and sends him into the barricade, followed by a toss powerbomb into the ropes.

We take a break and come back with Moose chopping away in the corner. Moose’s release Rock Bottom gets two and they head outside, where Swann ducks a chop that only hits post instead. Back in and Moose charges into a boot to the face, setting up a DDT to leave them both down.

Swann goes up top but gets superplex back down for a huge crash. We take another break and come back with Moose running the corner, only to dive into a cutter in some great timing. Swann’s Lethal Injection gets two but the middle rope 450 misses. The powerbomb gives Moose two but another spear is countered into a jackknife cover for the pin at 17:32.

Rating: B. These two were going back and forth and as usual, power vs. speed works well. It also helps to have this much extra time, allowing them to get things going more than usual. At the same time, it is a little strange to see Moose getting pinned clean, though I could go with more of Swann getting a singles push, as he is one of those recently untapped resources that Impact has.

On BTI, Heath took out Champagne Singh and Shera.

Heath talks about how he came here and then got hurt for 11 months. Then he had to save his best friend from a cult. Then Rhino got hurt, but then he came back and they won the Tag Team Titles. Now though, Rhino is hurt again, so he has to figure out what is next for him. Everyone is getting a wake up call.

Moose is annoyed when he runs into Brian Myers, who brings up Moose’s recent losses. Moose doesn’t want to hear this, but Myers offers to reform their team, which has Moose thinking.

Here is Bully Ray for a chat, complete with a piece of paper in his hand. Ray says he is a victim of the atrocious management around here, along with a victim of unnecessary violence at Against All Odds at the hands of Scott D’Amore. He is a victim of the system around here, and now he demands justice.

Cue D’Amore, with Ray demanding answers. D’Amore says when you’re a jerk to everyone, someone is going to be a jerk back. D’Amore mocks him for having a letter of complaint but reveals that he went before the board. They told him he was unbecoming of a president, which has Ray looking near stunned. Now all Ray wants is him to apologize, but D’Amore apparently has to take a leave of absence as president.

That’s music to his ears, with Ray saying D’Amore’s bosses screwed D’Amore over. Then D’Amore takes him down for some not so great right hands, which draws out Steve Maclin for the save. The beatdown is on, with Ray choking with a chair. The lights go out though and the lightning means it’s PCO time. A punch knocks the chair into Ray’s face and Maclin is knocked outside as well. Hold on though, as D’Amore has made one more match: a tag match between the four of them at Slammiversary.

Post break Maclin yells at Ray, who tells him to act like a Marine. Ray says that PCO (or maybe D’Amore) is just a man, but Frankie Kazarian pops up to say he’s a man who just beat them both up. Eddie Edwards (with Alisha Edwards) comes in to get between them and a match seems to be teased. With Ray and Maclin gone, Kazarian wants to know what is up with that. Eddie says they don’t like each other, but they’ll always have a bond, so they’re good. Kazarian (and Alisha) is confused but they’re at peace.

Decay vs. Bullet Club

Non-title. Austin gets taken into the corner for a kick to the head from Taurus and Steve gets in some hair pulling of his own. A kick gets Austin out of trouble but Taurus comes in sans tag and headbutts him down. Steve bites both champs but gets kicked out of the air for his trouble. Bey comes in and it’s the Art of Finesse into the Fold to finish Steve at 3:08.

Rating: C. I could have gone for more of this but that is the case with most of the matches the Club has these days. They really have gone into the area of being a great team, which is more than I was expecting when they were put together. This was shorter than it should have been, as Decay can put on a good match when they are given the chance, which isn’t the case in a match that barely breaks three minutes.

Post match the Club goes to the back and runs into the Motor City Machine Guns, with a showdown teased.

We get a preview of an upcoming documentary on Bhupinder Gujjar.

Gujjar is excited when Dirty Dango comes in to say no one would want to watch that. He’s assuming that Gujjar will sit around and hope that someone makes him a star. Gujjar calls him a bitter a****** and leaves. Dango: “I thought the backstage interview girls were supposed to be hot. No?”

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Trinity/Motor City Machine Guns/Nick Aldis/Deonna Purrazzo vs. Kenny King/Sheldon Jean/Savannah Evans/Trey Miguel/Gisele Shaw

Purrazzo and Shaw go to the mat to start and come up to a standoff with some trash talk. Shaw runs into an elbow to the face and Trinity comes in to unload with forearms. Shaw drives her into the corner though and it’s Evans coming in for some slams. Trinity breaks that up and Purrazzo comes back in for a Fujiwara armbar. Shaw’s save is cut off by Trinity with Starstruck but Miguel makes a save.

We take a break and come back with Aldis fighting out of King’s headlock. Sabin comes in to forearm Miguel and twists Jean’s knee across the middle rope for a bonus. Miguel sends Sabin into the corner and Jean’s knee is fine enough to come in for some elbows to the chest. Sabin is sent outside for a big group stomping, with Sabin’s partners being held back by the referee.

Back in and King stays on Sabin’s arm, allowing Miguel to come in for a front facelock. King cuts off a comeback attempt but a middle rope tornado DDT plants King for a breather. Shelley gets the hot tag and picks up the pace, including an overhead belly to belly to Miguel. A super atomic drop has Miguel gyrating quite a bit so Shelley pulls him into the Border City Stretch. Everything breaks down and King kicks Shelton by mistake. Aldis gives King a Michinoku Driver and Shell Shock finishes Jean at 18:38.

Rating: B-. This was a long match and at the end of the day, all that mattered was getting Shelley a win. Shelley got his big moment earlier in the night and he gets a pin as champion here. The Trinity vs. Purrazzo match is already set, though adding Shaw in wouldn’t be a crazy idea given what they have been doing. At the same time, another Miguel vs. Sabin match, maybe in something like Ultimate X, would fit in nicely at Slammiversary as well. All in all, there was a lot going on here, but it could all be setting up things for later.

Post match Aldis holds the title up to Shelley….and then blasts him with it to turn heel and end the show. That’s going to be better for him, as the respectable former champion was only so good.

Overall Rating: C+. They went in a rather different direction here with some LONG talking segments and only three matches. There was a lot of television time given to the matches and there were ten people in the main event, but it was like bunching several things together in some big lumps. I’m hoping that this isn’t the new norm as it’s not bad, but it’s not as good as it was before. Go with more acting and less talking, as it suits Impact a lot better. The Machine Guns era is off to an ok start, but they might be going in a shaky direction.

Results
Rich Swann b. Moose – Jackknife rollup
Bullet Club b. Decay – Fold to Steve
Motor City Machine Guns/Nick Aldis/Trinity/Deonna Purrazzo b. Gisele Shaw/Savannah Evans/Trey Miguel/Kenny King/Sheldon Jean – Shell Shock to Jean

 

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Impact Wrestling – June 8, 2023

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 8, 2023
Location: Western Fair District Agriplex, London, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

Somehow this is the go home show for Against All Odds, despite being less than two weeks removed from Under Siege. The main event of tomorrow’s show will see Steve Maclin defending the World Title against Alex Shelley, so odds are the hard push is on tonight. Other than that, Bully Ray is still the big bad and needs someone to come after him. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Chris Bey vs. Jason Hotch

Ace Austin, Brian Myers and John Skyler are here too. Before the match, Myers and Skyler promise that after Against All Odds, the Tag Team Titles will be in good hands. Hotch tries a rollup to start but gets suplexed down for his efforts. Bey chops away in the corner but a springboard is countered with a shove over the top to the floor. Back in and Bey hits a backdrop before kicking him in the head. The Art of Finesse is countered into a heck of a Blue Thunder Bomb to give Hotch two. Bey is back with a kick to the face but Hotch tries la majistral. That’s fine with Bey, who stacks him up for the pin at 7:36.

Rating: B-. The word I think of when I see a Bey match is “smooth”. He can make anything he does in the ring look good and that was the case again here, as he and Hotch got to go out there and do their thing for a bit with nothing looking bad. The title match should be good as well and I could go for more of any combination of these guys.

Post match the beatdown is on, with the champs being left laying.

Heath is back and ready for the 8-4-1 match. Tonight, he’ll take out Champagne Singh to get ready for tomorrow.

Dirty Dango talks about how he has money now and doesn’t need to be the dancing clown again. He doesn’t like wrestlers texting him but he’ll happily take money to not show up. The idea of shaking hands with sweaty awkward 18-35 year old men in some armory somewhere sounds like ALL KINDS of fun. A 5X Dirty Dango shirt won’t cover up the smell so take a shower ok? He doesn’t care about winning the Digital Media Title. If he wins it, he’ll list it on eBay and use the proceeds to go to Hawaii. With a girl. This stuff is glorious.

Champagne Singh vs. Heath

Shera is here with Singh. Heath takes him into the corner for some forearms to start but Shera offers a distraction. That lets Singh snapmare him into the ropes to start banging up the ribs, giving Singh a target. Heath slips out of a powerbomb and hits a powerslam, setting up the Wake Up Call for the pin at 2:51.

The Design promises war with Sami Callihan, Jake Crist and whomever else they can find. Yeah yeah blood and violence and carnage and all that good stuff.

Here is Joe Hendry to say he’s ready to face the man who broke his nose, Sheldon Jean. That would be the reality star under the tutelage of another reality star, Kenny King. It isn’t that simple for Jean, especially because we believe.

Joe Hendry vs. Sheldon Jean

Non-title and King is here with Jean. Hendry takes Jean down fast to start but a King distraction lets Jean get in a kick to the face. We take a break and come back with Hendry powering out of a guillotine choke and hitting a suplex. The fall away slam looks to set up the Standing Ovation but King offers a distraction. Not that it matters as a powerbomb sets up the Standing Ovation finishes Jean off at 7:32.

Rating: C. Jean meets the description of a good hand and that should be enough to keep him on the roster for a long while to come. Eventually he’ll get a win or two and that is all he needs to make him a bit of a star. Hendry on the other hand has so much charisma and now he is backing up up with a better look and the ability in the ring.

Post match Hendry calls out Dirty Dango, who appears to say that he hates pro wrestling. He’ll pass on the fighting (it’s his day off), but Hendry has a new video about Dango, who seems to have lost his mind. Hendry plans to figure out what happened to make Dango nuts, sending us into a hilarious history of Dango’s career (he started by pinning Chris Jericho 1-2-3, then he was impersonating a cop with Breeze, then he couldn’t get laid on Total Divas). With the song over, Jean and King jump Hendry but Santino Marella comes out to make the save with the Cobra to Jean. Those songs are AMAZING and this was great again.

Gisele Shaw and company brag about taking out Jordynne Grace and think it should be a warning to Trinity. This is her house, and rent is due. Revenge is sworn at Against All Odds.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Death Dollz vs. The Coven

The Coven is defending. Wilde can’t do much with Jessicka to start so it’s off to Rush, who yells at King during the staredown. Rush takes her down but gets sent into the corner so King can take over. A swinging suplex gives King two but Rush gets over for the tag to Jessicka. That’s fine with Wilde, who sends her into the corner to take over as well as the Dollz can’t keep anything going here. Jessicka clotheslines her way to freedom and brings Rush back in to pick up the pace. Everything breaks down and King gets in a cheap shot to Rush, setting up a big boot/spinebuster to retain at 6:25.

Rating: C. As usual, the lack of depth in the division causes problems around here, as it’s hard to get around the fact that the division is the champs and whomever they are defending against at the moment. This should get rid of the Dollz for the time being, but who is there left for the Coven to face? I’m sure some wrestlers will be thrown together, but that doesn’t help the underlying problem.

Video on Alex Shelley becoming #1 contender and finally getting his World Title shot last August. Now he knows what it takes to come up short and that was a learning experience. We hear about the wrestlers that Shelley has mentored or influenced over the years but when is it about him? It doesn’t need to be this week, but Shelley almost has to win the title, just based off of how it has been built up.

Steve Maclin talks about all of the wrestlers who want the title but Bully Ray interrupts. Ray says he likes Maclin, who just won’t listen. Don’t worry though, because he won’t come for Maclin’s title until Slammiversary.

Killer Kelly vs. Masha Slamovich in a Dog Collar match is set for Against All Odds.

Bhupinder Gujjar vs. Trey Miguel

Non-title. Gujjar takes him down to start but Miguel hits a kick to the face. With Miguel on the floor, Gujjar loads up a dive, which is knocked out of the air. Back in and a slingshot splash sets up a Lionsault to give Miguel one. Gujjar knocks him down again but misses a frog splashes, allowing Miguel to kick him down. Miguel misses what looked to be a top rope double stomp but comes right back with the Lightning Spiral for the pin at 5:19.

Rating: C. This was just a quick “Trey Miguel is great” win before he defends the title again tomorrow. Miguel is getting pretty high up there with some of the records and it’s pretty awesome to see him doing so well. If nothing else, having someone with a consistent track record holding a title is a good thing, and I’d like to see Miguel move up a bit after losing the title.

Post match Miguel says he doesn’t respect Chris Sabin and declares himself the a different kind of champion. He promises that tomorrow, he’ll win again and there will be no “yeah but’s” this time around.

Johnny Swinger brags about how great he is in the ring and talks about his daddy, Donny Swinger, telling him “Swing Sonny”, sometimes it’s time to pass the heat onto someone else. Like Russo! Either way, he blames “crooked referees paid off by Gene Simmons and Bob Seger”. That’s why he’s going to have Zicky Dice become a referee, and then he’ll have a strap around his waist. This man is a genius.

Trinity and Deonna Purrazzo are ready to fight at Slammiversary, but they’re ready to fight Gisele Shaw and Savannah Evans tomorrow night too. It’s too bad that Jordynne Grace is out of action indefinitely, but this is a dangerous business.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Moose/Rich Swann vs. Jonathan Gresham/Nick Aldis

Swann and Gresham start things off with Swann kicking him in the face. Aldis comes in and gets caught with a headscissors but ducks an enziguri. The King’s Lynn Cloverleaf is blocked though and it’s Moose coming in. Moose misses a charge and gets punched in the face before Aldis grabs an armbar.

We take a break and come back with Gresham hitting Moose in the ribs, allowing Gresham and Aldis to start working on the arm. Moose powers Gresham away though and it’s Swann coming back in for a rolling splash. It’s back to Moose for a heck of a whip into the corner to leave Gresham grabbing his chest, followed by a near chop to tag Swann back in.

A quick taunt of Aldis is enough for Gresham to be pulled back into the wrong corner. He slips out of what looked to be a powerbomb though and the diving tag brings in Aldis to pick up the pace. Moose gets dropped so Aldis’ top rope elbow can get two but it’s a double clothesline to put both of them down. Everything breaks down and Swann’s Lethal Injection gets two on Gresham. It’s back to Moose off a blind tag though and a powerbomb finishes Gresham at 13:31.

Rating: B-. This was a nice preview of the 8-4-1 match and that’s all it needed to be. We could be in for some interesting combinations in the match so throwing together a random tag match like this is what makes sense. Aldis continues to look good in his comeback and Swann/Gresham are both capable of doing whatever they need. Moose hasn’t been featured as much recently so this was a nice return to form.

Post match the brawl is on again, with Heath running in to help take Moose out. Aldis and Heath brawl to the floor so Swann loads up a dive, only to get caught by Bully Ray. PCO runs in for the slugout and hits the big dive through the ropes, allowing him to stand tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Impact was in a really weird spot this week as they had two regular shows to build up the next monthly special. That isn’t a ton of time and they more or less opted to just go as fast as they could without going too in-depth with much of anything. Instead they had two good matches and some other stuff in the middle that worked out well enough. Tomorrow’s card has potential and I could go for seeing what they have in store. Things can get back to normal next week, and if the last few weeks are any indication, we should be in for a very nice build to Slammiversary.

Results
Chris Bey b. Jason Hotch – Rollup
Heath b. Champagne Singh – Wake Up Call
Joe Hendry b. Sheldon Jean – Standing Ovation
The Coven b. Death Dollz – Big boot/spinebuster combination to Rush
Trey Miguel b. Bhupinder Gujjar – Lightning Spiral
Moose/Rich Swann b. Jonathan Gresham/Nick Aldis – Powerbomb to Gresham

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – May 12, 2008: Power Couple?

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 12, 2008
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home Raw for Judgment Day and the title match is set. Unfortunately it hasn’t been the most well built match in the world, as it’s HHH vs. Randy Orton in a cage, which is only so interesting. Other than that, John vs. JBL and Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho are going to beef up the card well enough, with the final push coming tonight. Oh and General Manage William Regal is insane. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of HHH and Mr. Kennedy losing to ECW last week, followed by Randy Orton taking HHH out.

Lilian Garcia is in the ring with William Regal, who has her sing God Save The Queen. Regal reminds the fans that he can have everyone thrown out and goes to the floor, where he has two fans ejected. Mickie James comes out to beg Regal to rethink what he did (possibly saying it was her brother and his girlfriend), so Regal threatens to strip her of the Women’s Title.

Cue John Cena to interrupt, with James leaving rather quickly. Cena tries to get Regal to calm down, but Regal says Vince McMahon put him in this spot. Cena: “Vince McMahon is insane.” We hear some emails from fans, complaining about Regal’s recent actions. Cena: “This is WCW Thunder bad.” One fan wants to start a FIRE REGAL chant (yes he included the claps) so there go the live fans.

Regal promises to not cut the lights off tonight and knows that Cena wants revenge on Randy Orton, so they can be in the main event. Cena wants to know when JBL will interfere, but Regal bans interference (how this is different than any other match isn’t clear). Regal hopes he has gotten some respect from Cena, but Cena says that was just making a good match. Also, Regal needs to learn that this is the United States of America, so he has Garcia sing Respect. Garcia sings the heck out of it but doesn’t get much of a reaction until the ending.

Tag Team Titles: Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes vs. Santino Marella/Carlito

Holly and Rhodes are defending and Roddy Piper is sitting at ringside. Holly runs Santino over to start and hangs him over the ropes for the kick to the questionable area (Piper approves). It’s off to Carlito for a cheap shot to take over and Santino gets to drop some elbows. A suplex gets Holly out of trouble though and it’s Cody coming in to hammer away. Cody hits a crossbody and powerslam but Santino pops back up. Piper offers a distraction though and it’s a DDT to retain the titles. Short and to the point here, now PLEASE FIND SOME NEW CHALLENGERS.

We look back at Shawn Michaels hurting his knee at Backlash, with commentary not sure if he is telling the truth or not.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Snitsky

Snitsky powers him into the corner to start and then does it again for a bonus. An elbow gives Snitsky two and we’re already in a bearhug. Kennedy slugs his way to freedom but gets shouldered right back down. Back up and Kennedy gets smart by starting in on the leg, with a chop block getting two. Kennedy has to slip out of a pumphandle and its’ the Mic Check for the pin.

Rating: C. It’s almost weird to see Kennedy getting a win like this but it did give him a bit of momentum on his way to…whatever it is he has going on at the moment. Kennedy is someone who could be a star if he actually gets a maintained push and beating Snitsky is a tiny start. Snitsky continues to play his role perfectly: a giant with some power who can look intimidating and lose almost every time without much trouble.

Santino Marella is mad about Roddy Piper costing him a title because this isn’t the 80s anymore. Vengeance is sworn.

Mickie James thanks John Cena for the save earlier….and invites him out for drinks with her brother and his girlfriend. Cena mocks being too serious to do that and says he’d love to go, but it could be a wild night. Mickie can go for wild and things get a bit awkward but they’re cool.

Melina/Beth Phoenix vs. Maria/Mickie James

Mickie kicks Melina up to the ropes to start but Melina reverses, only to knock off the apron by mistake. Mickie gets taken into the corner…as Beth walks out. A neckbreaker gives Mickie the fast pin.

Here is Chris Jericho for a chat. Jericho shows us the clip of Shawn Michaels injuring his knee at Backlash and talks about a fan poll with 72% of the fans giving Shawn the benefit of the doubt. He doesn’t buy it though and we see Shawn throwing a superkick in their tag match last week. That superkick made him change his mind and now he’s willing to call off their match at Judgment Day.

Cue Shawn to make a confession: yeah he faked the knee injury. Jericho doesn’t buy it because he isn’t falling for these mind games. Shawn tries to say it’s true but Jericho doesn’t believe him…..so there’s a superkick. Shawn: “Trust me when I tell you: I’m not hurt.” He flips out of the ring and walks off just fine. So there’s a twist.

We get a surprise as Jeff Hardy returns from a suspension. He didn’t want to go but he made a mistake and had to pay for it. Hardy wants the Intercontinental Title back but gets cut off by William Regal. No one wants to hear from Hardy, who deserves punishment. Like a match with this man.

Jeff Hardy vs. Umaga

Umaga runs him over to start and hits the middle rope headbutt. The hip attack misses in the corner though and Hardy hits the Twist of Fate for the pin out of nowhere.

Video on John Cena vs. JBL.

Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Cryme Tyme

Murdoch runs JTG into the corner to start but JTG does the same to him, allowing the tag off to Shad. Some hard shots allow JTG to get two off a sunset flip but Cade comes in to kick JTG in the face. Murdoch comes back in and sits down on another sunset flip attempt to pin JTG in another fast match.

Post match Cade is happy with the victory and thinks Murdoch’s singing made it work. Murdoch gets to sing the victory song, which is The Gambler by Kenny Rogers. Then Cade punches him in the face and walks off.

Smackdown Rebound.

Melina asks Beth Phoenix what was up with walking out on her earlier. Beth blames Melina for the title loss last week….and then slams her into a locker over and over to leave Melina laying.

Judgment Day rundown.

Randy Orton talks about how he beat John Cena and HHH at Wrestlemania so he’ll do it again tonight and at Judgment Day.

Randy Orton vs. John Cena

Orton goes with a headlock to start but Cena is right back out with some right hands. The release fisherman’s suplex gives Cena two but Orton’s backbreaker gets the same. Orton’s stomp to the head is blocked though and Cena shoves him to the floor as we take a break. Back with Orton losing control of a chinlock but snapping off a powerslam for two.

The chinlock goes back on but Cena fights up again. The RKO is blocked though and the top rope Fameasser connects. Hold on though as here are William Regal….and JBL, who is now guest referee because Mike Chioda is incompetent. Cena knocks JBL off the apron and tries the AA on Orton. JBL is back in with a big boot and a very fast count gives Orton the pin.

Rating: C+. Just like the main event of last week’s Smackdown, you could probably count down the time until the evil boss did something evil. You knew Regal wasn’t going to let Cena have a clean match with Orton here and it was all about how JBL was going to interfere. Cena and Orton work well enough together and they didn’t have time to overstay their welcomes here.

Post match the big brawl is on with HHH coming in. The double brawls are on, with the John’s fighting into the crowd. The cage (hey there’s a cage) is lowered and HHH knocks Orton to the floor, leaving Orton panicking to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was one of those odd shows where pretty much everything was set up for the pay per view so this was all about keeping things settled. Other than Shawn admitting he was faking the injury, there wasn’t a ton of new stuff on here. Well save for Cena and James possibly becoming a thing, which is probably going to be something for later anyway. Not an awful show, but not one you need to see either.

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – June 1, 2023: I Don’t Know If I Can Say That Anymore

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 1, 2023
Location: Western Fair District Agriplex, London, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

It’s the first show after Under Siege and a lot of things took place at the show. First and foremost, Steve Maclin retained the World Title by defending PCO but Bully Ray attacked Scott D’Amore to end the show, even putting him through a flaming table. Other than that, we have a new #1 contender in the form of Alex Shelley, who will get a World Title shot at Against All Odds. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Under Siege recap.

Here is Bully Ray to get things going and no one is happy to see him. He has been putting people through tables throughout his career and no one is better at it in wrestling history. We hear about some of the people who he has put through them over the years, but the really bad ones are the people he puts through flaming tables. That’s what he did to Scott D’Amore and there is no one here to stop him.

Now it is on to Against All Odds, where he can become #1 contender and then to Slammiversary to win the World Title. Cue World Champion Steve Maclin to interrupt to say he liked what happened to D’Amore. What Bully needs to understand though is Maclin allowed Ray to hurt D’Amore like that. Ray tells him to shut up and says no one tells him what he can do….but then backtracks and says Maclin is the World Champion and can do what he wants. Maclin proposes a partnership, but he’s also cool with the idea of beating Ray at Slammiversary if he has to.

Cue the Motor City Machine Guns to interrupt, with Alex Shelley saying he’s leaving Against All Odds with the World Title. Ray says that usually he would rip Shelley apart on the might but the reality is that Shelley is one of the best in the world. He has seen wrestlers in the locker room watching Shelley matches, but Shelley must be bothered by never winning the big one.

Chris Sabin brings up beating Ray for the World Title but Maclin cuts him off to yell at Shelley for the lack of respect. Shelley says “yep” when asked if he thinks he can win the title but Maclin asks why it will be different this time. Shelley says it’s because Maclin is no Josh Alexander, which makes Ray laugh. That doesn’t make sense to Shelley, because Alexander beat Ray too. We finally get the challenge for the tag match tonight and Ray likes the idea….but not tonight.

Cue Subculture (Mark Andrews/Flash Morgan Webster/Dani Luna, formerly of NXT UK) as this segment is somehow still going. Subculture wants to face the Guns tonight and that match is on. This was nearly twenty minutes long and felt WAY out of place on an Impact show, especially when the only match made was from people who popped up at the end. I know they don’t have much time before Against All Odds but please don’t let this WWE style segment become normal around here.

Nick Aldis feels dangerous when he is in a nice suit like this but he feels all the more dangerous when he has momentum behind him. He praises Kenny King for a great match at Under Siege and King will be even more ready whenever they face off again. As for Against All Odds, Aldis is ready for the 8-4-1 match (starts off as an eight man tag, with the winning team immediately having a four way to crown a new #1 contender) because he’ll have to adapt, which is what he does best. Then he’s winning the World Title.

Eddie Edwards vs. Yuya Uemura

Alisha Edwards is here with Eddie. Feeling out process to start with Uemura grabbing an armdrag into an armbar. Back up and Eddie takes him into the corner for some chops, only to have a forearm knock Eddie outside. The slingshot dive drops Eddie again though and we take a break. Back with Uemura fighting out of a chinlock but getting taken right back down.

This time Uemura fights up with a running clothesline and a belly to back suplex gets two. Edwards tries a double underhook but gets backdropped away, only to have Alisha distract Uemura on the top. That means a superplex can bring Uemura back down but Uemura cuts off the Boston Knee Party with a dropkick. The swinging Rock Bottom sets up a high crossbody, which is kneed out of the air. The tiger driver gives Edwards two and the Boston Knee Party finally finishes Uemura at 13:30.

Rating: B. They had a good match here as Uemura continues to get better and better every week. Commentary is right when they say that he needs a big win, but I’m not sure how much longer he is going to be here on excursion in the first place. If that’s the case, just how far does Impact want to push him? For now, I guess they’ll have to settle for a good hand who can work well with anyone.

Post match Eddie teases respect but pulls away from the handshake. Cue Frankie Kazarian to say that isn’t how we do this around here and the fight is on, with Eddie being dropped. Alisha tries to jump on Frankie and is dropped as well, allowing Kazarian to leave.

Decay vs. Sami Callihan/Jake Crist

Crist bites Steve to start and hands it off to Callihan, only to have Taurus come in and clear the ring. That’s not enough for Taurus, who throws Steve over the top onto both of them. Back in and Crist starts firing off superkicks for a breather, followed by putting Steve on Taurus’ shoulders. Callihan puts Crist on his own shoulders for a cutter to Steve and the pin at 1:35. Cool finisher and dang that went fast.

Post match here is the Design to lay out Crist and Callihan. Rich Swann makes the save.

Post break, Swann, Crist and Callihan are ready for Against All Odds….but Swann already has a spot in the 8-4-1 match. Callihan and Crist understand so they can find someone else. Callihan says the doctor is going to have to call the fox.

Trinity vs. Savannah Evans

Jai Vidal and Gisele Shaw are here with Evans. Trinity grabs a waistlock to start and gets backed into the corner for her efforts. A headlock takeover doesn’t work for Trinity so she forearms away in the corner. Evans plants her with a powerbomb for two and Trinity is in trouble. Back in and Trinity gets smart by hitting a springboard kick to the face to put Evans down. A side slam cuts Trinity off but she pulls Evans into the reverse Rings of Saturn for the tap at 4:33.

Rating: C+. Evans continues to work as a monster but that is only going to have so much impact if she keeps losing all the time. Trinity is someone who is probably going to wind up being near the top of the division sooner rather than later so her winning here makes all of the sense. They went back and forth here for a few minutes but ultimately, Trinity winning was the only option.

Post match Trinity gets the mic and says she wants the Knockouts Title. Cue Deonna Purrazzo to say ask her to her face. Trinity issues the challenge for Slammiversary and Purrazzo is in. Shaw, Evans and Vidal are up for the beatdown though, only to have Jordynne Grace come in for the save. That doesn’t exactly work though as she is beaten down as well, setting up a pair of knees from Shaw.

Dani Luna vs. Jody Threat

Dani Luna is part of Subculture, who are here with her. Threat headlocks her over to start but Luna does the exact same. Luna powers her into the corner but gets sunset flipped for two. Threat knocks her back down and scores with a heck of a Cactus Clothesline. Threat’s running flip dive off the apron, followed by the running knee to the back. Luna has had it with this and hits a powerbomb for two and a hard lariat gets the same. Threat snaps off a German suplex and hits a reverse F5 (the F Bomb) for the pin at 7:05.

Rating: B-. This was a hard hitting fight and it worked well with what they were doing. Impact has done a nice job of turning Threat into…well, a threat, and that’s what they need to do every so often. Threat is someone who feels like she has been built from the ground up and could become something around here. On the other hand you have Luna, who could do well as a powerhouse with a unique look.

Santino Marella and Joe Hendry are talking about Dirty Dango when Sheldon Jean and Kenny King come in. King thinks Jean should get a match with Hendry, so Santino makes it for next week. As for Against All Odds, Hendry can defend his Digital Media Title against Dango. Works for Hendry.

We look at Killer Kelly and Masha Slamovich brawling at Under Siege. A chain was involved.

Kelly wants a dog collar match with Slamovich. Her talk about giving in to your natural instinct is designed to make various suggestions.

Here is what’s coming on various shows.

Subculture vs. Motor City Machine Guns

Shelley and Andrews get things going with Shelley’s armdrag not getting him very far. Sabin comes in to headlock Webster to little avail as Webster grabs an armdrag of his own. Everything breaks down and the Guns send Andrews outside to kick Webster down. Back in and Andrews gets kicked down as well, allowing Shelley to grab a cross arm choke on Webster.

Back up and Webster gets Shelley into the corner for a quick dropkick to the leg. Subculture hits back to back flips onto Sabin to send him outside as well, setting up the stereo suicide dives. Back in and the Guns hit some clotheslines to take over and we take a break. We come back with Andrews being caught in a surfboard for a bulldog from Sabin. The chinlock goes on for a bit but Andrews fights up, allowing the tag off to Webster. Everything breaks down again and Webster hits a springboard moonsault to drop both Guns.

Webster hits a big dive onto Sabin and a double Falcon Arrow (that’s a new one) gets two back inside. Shelley comes back in for the save and house is cleaned, including a Death Valley Driver/running neckbreaker combination (that’s a new one too). A Magic Killer (that’s not a new one) gets two on Andrews but he pops up off a Doomsday dropkick.

Shelley is knocked outside, leaving Sabin to clothesline both of them inside out. Cradle Shock is countered into a Stundog Millionaire (sweet) but Webster misses a 450. Sabin grabs a cutter on Webster and the Dream Sequence hits Andrews. The Dirt Bomb finishes Webster off at 16:13.

Rating: B+. There are certain matches that are designed to have talented stars letting it all hang out and hitting one big move after another until someone finally gets pinned. That is what you had here and this was an awesome TV main event. The Guns can still hang with anyone and if Subculture wants a job in Impact, there is a good chance that they got one here. Great stuff here and worth a look if you have time.

Overall Rating: B. I find myself looking forward to Impact more and more each week and that was the case again here. The opener and main event (especially the latter) are both rather awesome TV matches and the rapid fire build to Against All Odds wasn’t bad at all. Cut down on the way too long opening segment and this show is probably the best TV show of the week. Awesome stuff here, as I’m starting to wonder if it’s still fair to say Impact is on a roll, as this has been going on for a long time now.

Results
Eddie Edwards b. Yuya Uemura – Boston Knee Party
Sami Callihan/Jake Crist b. Decay – Elevated cutter to Steve
Trinity b. Savannah Evans – Reverse Rings of Saturn
Jody Threat b. Dani Luna – F Bomb
Motor City Machine Guns b. Subculture – Dirt Bomb to Webster

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – May 5, 2008: Lights Out (Again)

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 5, 2008
Location: Air Canada Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 16,664
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We are less than two weeks away from Judgment Day and we have a bit of a crazy boss. Last week saw General Manager William Regal crowned as King, though the power seems to have already gone to his head as he cut the show off so fans who booed him couldn’t see the ending. Mr. Kennedy isn’t happy and it might be time to deal with things. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of William Regal going all scooters last week.

Here is Vince McMahon to say Regal pulled the plug in the end of a title match. This has led to a variety of protests from the fans, with many of them demanding that Vince appear tonight. However, McMahon finds Regal’s actions to be visionary, so Regal reminds Vince of himself! He is all for Regal’s actions and no punishment is coming.

Here is Regal for a chat. Regal doesn’t like the fans disrespecting him again here….so turn out the lights again. He has the lights turned back on but says he won’t be disrespected. Cue Mr. Kennedy to interrupt, saying all Regal has to do is agree to face him. Instead, Regal puts him in the main event against…..the entire ECW roster (or about six members). This is part of a deal with Armando Alejandro Estrada to promote tomorrow’s 100th ECW, but here is HHH to interrupt.

Just like Mr. Kennedy Kennedy here, HHH means no disrespect and tells Regal to not make mistakes. Last week, Regal cutting the lights off during HHH’s match and disrespecting him would be mistakes. HHH says Regal doesn’t want a war with him, but Regal says HHH already has to defend the title against Randy Orton in a cage at Judgment Day. As for tonight, HHH can join Mr. Kennedy in the main event against ECW. Regal is absolutely nailing it here and Kennedy is feeling like quite the rebel.

Women’s Title: Beth Phoenix vs. Mickie James

James is defending in a lumberjack match. Beth easily powers her around to start and gets two off a running shoulder. With James on the floor, the evil lumberjacks get in their required cheap shots but James is right back with a neckbreaker. The lumberjacks get into their big fight (at least they didn’t waste time here) and we take an early break. Back with Beth cranking on both arms until Mickie fights up and dropkicks her way to freedom. The top rope Thesz press gets two and Beth is sent outside for a beating. In the melee, Melina goes for Mickie but hits Beth by mistake, allowing Mickie to grab a small package to retain.

Rating: C. This was all about the insanity going on around the ring while Mickie and Beth were just kind of in the middle. There are a lot of women in the division but there aren’t many who are ready to go after the title. That is going to have to change, but for now it’s likely going to be Mickie/Beth/Melina.

Chris Jericho comes up to see William Regal, who asks about Shawn Michaels’ knee. Jericho is sure that Shawn is faking, which doesn’t go well for him because tonight it’s Jericho/Shawn vs. Miz/John Morrison.

Trevor Murdoch is singing when Trish Stratus comes in to look confused. Ron Simmons shows up for his cameo line.

Randy Orton doesn’t agree with the idea that HHH had him beaten last week but that’s not the point. As for tonight, he has CM Punk, who might cash in Money In The Bank on him when Orton gets the title back in two weeks.

Katie Lea Burchill/Paul Burchill vs. John Cutler

Hold on though as William Regal pops up to say Jim Ross isn’t going to call this match. Instead, here is Mike Adamle to take the spot, leaving Ross looking rather annoyed. Paul chops him up against the ropes as Katie seems rather pleased. A knee drop lets Katie stomp away and we hit the chinlock. Back up and Cutler tries to roll Katie up, earning a stomping from Paul. The top rope double stomp from Katie sets up the single version from Paul, giving Katie the pin.

Rating: D+. There’s something to be said about Katie being the focal point here as she has the charisma to get noticed, but I’m not sure where this is going to go. The bigger focus being on the commentary didn’t help either, but the Burchills are at least different. Paul still has the intensity to make something like this work, though it hasn’t exactly gotten there yet.

Chris Jericho comes up to Shawn Michaels in the back. Shawn says he’s really hurt but he’ll do his best, as always. Jericho doesn’t seem to buy it.

Chris Jericho/Shawn Michaels vs. Miz/John Morrison

Non-title, JR is back on commentary and Shawn is badly limping on the way to the ring. Jericho and Miz start things off with Jericho hitting a quick suplex. Morrison comes in to kick away in the corner, setting up the springboard spinning kick to the face. It’s right back to Miz, who is quickly pulled into the Walls. Morrison makes the save so Shawn comes in with Sweet Chin Music, leaving him writhing in pain. A quick Lionsault gives Jericho the pin.

Rating: C. This was more storyline advancement than anything else as Michaels is either telling the truth or milking the heck out of faking the injury. It’s an interesting story as it could go either way, which is something you don’t get very often. If nothing else, Jericho being all smug and knowing that Shawn is faking it is making for good TV. Now just stop pinning the champs and it’s that much better.

Shawn needs help getting to the back and Jericho is confused.

CM Punk vs. Randy Orton

Orton starts fast by sending him to the apron and then down to the floor in a crash. Back in and Orton starts the circle stomp but misses the knee drop. Punk kicks away but misses a springboard spinning crossbody. Back up and Punk kicks away, setting up the knee into the corner and the bulldog right back out of it. Cue William Regal though and let’s turn out the lights because this match is over.

Rating: C. Well that’s certainly a different way to go and this Regal stuff is getting more interesting. It’s not often that you see someone actually shaking things up like this and it’s making things feel different. Sometimes that is the way you need tog o and making Orton mad is going to be an upgrade as well. The match was energetic while it lasted but it didn’t exactly have time to go anywhere before the storyline ending.

Post break Orton is livid and goes to find Regal for some answers.

It’s time for Carlito’s Cabana. We look at Roddy Piper making a surprise appearance last week and slapping Santino Marella in the face. Therefore, here is Piper as this week’s guest. Carlito says he gets that Santino can be annoying but Piper took it too far. Piper: “Listen Buckwheat.”

We hear about Piper taking it too far every time, including when he beat cancer. He’s not going to apologize for anything, including not wanting to sit and talk about what he did. Carlito says he would have slapped Piper back but Piper says Carlito should be glad that Piper didn’t bring a seagull to make a next in Carlito’s hair.

Cue Santino Marella to mock Piper for taking so long to become Intercontinental Champion. Piper brings up Santino’s recent DUI, but here is Cody Rhodes to interrupt. Now it’s Cryme Tyme (Piper: “HOLY COW!”) and the villains (oddly enough not including Piper) bail. The good guys dance. This was there to get Piper on the show and for the dancing at the end, but the seemingly endless Carlito/Marella Tag Team Title chase is dragging things down.

Post break Cryme Tyme is still in the ring and thinks they have a lot of stuff to sell around here. They have a hammock and coconuts! Selling ensues and a lot of money changes hands (with a fan getting the hammock).

Judgment Day rundown.

JBL is standing next to his limo and offers to share his lifestyle. We go inside the limo for a ride into the arena, with JBL talking about all of the features in the limo (full bar, high speed internet). This was a very JBL thing to do and it worked.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. DH Smith

Before the match, JBL talks about Smith’s father but says the British Bulldog can’t help him. The beating is on fast and the Clothesline From JBL finishes in about a minute.

Post match the big beating is on until referees break it up.

William Regal tells the ECW roster to get it together tonight because they have a big mission. The team goes to the ring, with Kane glaring at Regal as he leaves.

Smackdown Rebound.

HHH/Mr. Kennedy vs. ECW Roster

One fall to a finish. Kennedy and Elijah Burke start things off with Kennedy grabbing a front facelock and handing it off to HHH. The jumping knee drops Matt Striker so it’s quickly off to Mike Knox. The villains (mostly at least) take over on HHH, who shrugs it off and brings Kennedy back in. Tommy Dreamer grabs a snap suplex and brings in Kofi Kingston, only to have Shelton Benjamin tag himself in. The distraction lets HHH come back in and everything breaks down. Kane chokeslams Kennedy but Bam Neeley jumps Kane, allowing Chavo Guerrero to hit a frog splash for the pin.

Rating: C. These things are always weird as there is only so much you can do with two vs. more than a dozen wrestlers. ECW was more or less rotating wrestlers in and out and the real focus here was on the visual of having that many people out there. I’m not sure how much of a punishment it was, but at least it wasn’t the same stuff we see every week.

Post match the big brawl is on with HHH cleaning house but the lights go out. They come back up and it’s Randy Orton with an RKO to HHH to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The Regal stuff is interesting and that is what the show needed given how weak the wrestling was this week. There is only so much you can get out of a bunch of weak matches and a kind of strange Roddy Piper segment and this show proved it. Hopefully this was just a one off weak show, as there are pieces, like Jericho vs. Shawn, there that could help carry the weak portions.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – April 28, 2008: He Does Good Crazy

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 28, 2008
Location: IZOD Center, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 17,166
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with Backlash and the big story is that HHH won the Raw World Title from Randy Orton in the four way main event. That alone should be enough to make things interesting tonight but we also have Shawn Michaels defeating Batista after taking advantage of his own knee injury. That sounds like it could go somewhere, so let’s get to it.

Here is Backlash if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of HHH winning the Raw World Title in last night’s four way elimination match.

Here is HHH to get things going, complete with big shiny belt. HHH declares The Age Of Orton officially dead and now we pause because they are chanting his name. Eight months ago, he wasn’t sure if he was ever going to return to the ring and now he knows that The Game is back. Cue Randy Orton to interrupt and he isn’t overly pleased. Orton talks about how the odds were stacked against him last night but HHH brings up Orton being all confident before the match. Now he’s the victim? Orton: “The victim of my own success. I was so dominant they wouldn’t put me against anyone one on one.”

HHH thinks Orton liked the idea of hiding behind these multiman matches but Orton has already got the rematch set for Judgment Day in less than three weeks. HHH says he bragged too, but in his case, it was the truth. Orton gets in his face and is knocked out with a single shot, sending Orton to the floor. He’ll just have his rematch clause tonight instead. They got to the point pretty fast here.

Post break, the title match is on.

Mickie James/Maria/Ashley/Michelle McCool/Cherry/Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian Hall/Natalya/Victoria/Layla

Backlash rematch and it’s a big brawl before the bell rings. We settle down for the opening bell and Beth decking Kelly from behind. Beth powers her straight into the corner and hands it off to Victoria. The spinning side slam is countered into a headscissors but Victoria takes her straight into the corner. Melina’s running/screaming hip attack in the corner gets two and Jillian comes in, only to miss her handspring elbow. Mickie comes in to clean house and gets a bridging rollup to pin Jillian.

Rating: D+. Well they made good time, but a twelve woman match where half of them don’t get in isn’t exactly a rampaging success. They didn’t have time to do anything here and this would have been better off as a two on two tag match instead. There is some talent in the division, but with only the Raw title to fight over, it leaves a lot of them without much to do save for appearances like this one.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Robbie McCallister

Rory is here with Robbie and the beating is on quickly. The Clothesline from JBL finishes at around a minute, which has me wondering if this was punishment for Robbie popping up in the crowd at Impact around Wrestlemania the previous month.

Post match JBL grabs a headset and blames John Cena for not winning the title last night. He wants the winner of tonight’s title match.

Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. Trevor Murdoch/Lance Cade

Cade and London start things off with Cade hitting a high backdrop for an early two. Murdoch comes in to hammer away as the fans are dubbing this boring. London slips away and brings in Kendrick to pick up the pace, with Murdoch screaming at Cade. Murdoch comes in and is promptly rolled up for the pin.

Post match Murdoch grabs the mic, gets on the announcers’ table, and since I Got Friends In Low Places. Cade is adequately confused by the whole thing.

We look at Shawn Michaels tweaking his knee last night against Batista but rolling him up for the pin anyway.

Paul Burchill/Katie Lea Burchill vs. Super Crazy

Before the match, Katie thanks William Regal for making this a handicap match. Paul wastes no time in taking Crazy down, allowing Katie to hit a running boot to the face. Crazy avoids a charge in the corner though and kicks Paul down. The moonsault misses though and Katie’s missile dropkick sets up the curb stomp to give Paul the face pin. Short and to the point here.

Randy Orton is asked if he has second thoughts about using his rematch clause tonight. Orton: “No.”

And now, the official coronation of William Regal (thank goodness it isn’t one of those knockoffs). Regal, on the throne in the ring, says (in between some hardcore WHATing) he will now be General Manager AND King because he has earned both titles. You will have no choice but to respect and fear him, because he is your ruler, better and…..here’s Mr. Kennedy to interrupt.

Kennedy can’t congratulate Regal for the win because he wasn’t even in the tournament in the first place. He hits the catchphrase but Regal cuts him off and says get an appointment/make an apology. Kennedy teases an apology before switching to his catchphrase instead. Regal punches him down and referees have to make it up. Kennedy felt more like a star here and I was feeling the hype that he has had for so long here. This worked, and that’s kind of a rare thing for Kennedy these days.

Cody Rhodes vs. Santino Marella

Hardcore Holly and Carlito are here too. Before the match, Santino says he DOES NOT like the fake Italians on the Sopranos, which is set right here in New Jersey. Santino actually knocks him down and hammers away a bit to start before dodging a high crossbody. We hit the chinlock for a bit before a hard hiptoss (yes a hiptoss) of all things gets two. Rhodes fights up and hits a quick DDT for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one, but the bigger problem continues to be how long these teams have been feuding. There are other teams around, but for some reason these two have to feud for the better part of ever. Rhodes and Holly have already beaten them, so why are we still stuck on this feud?

Post match Cody mocks Santino’s accent and gets taken down with the Backstabber.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel and Chris Jericho is in a tuxedo. Jericho is here to present an award for the Best Actor in Sports Entertainment. The nominees are:

Mr. Fuji and the Magnificent Muraco in Fuji General
Michael Cole in Deliverance Part II (as in the infamous Heidenreich segment, complete with banjo music)
Shawn Michaels pretending to have a knee injury at Backlash

Why yes, Shawn does win, so here he is to accept, limping all the way down the ramp. Jericho wants an acceptance speech, but Shawn insists that he is really hurt. That doesn’t go well with Jericho, who thinks Shawn goes from good to bad faster than anyone. Shawn would even try superkicking him with the bad leg if there was no podium between them. That doesn’t get anything from Shawn, so Jericho has Shawn’s music play before leaving. I think we might be coming back to this one.

Santino Marella bumps into a woman he finds attractive….but it’s really Roddy Piper. Santino brings up the Goonies music video but Piper has no time for this. There’s your bizarre cameo of the week.

We recap HHH winning the Raw World Title last night.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Randy Orton

HHH is defending and we even get a weapons check to make it feel special. They fight over a lockup to start and go straight to the staredown. A shoulder puts HHH down and Orton grabs a headlock to grind away a bit. HHH is right back with a headlock of his own, followed by some aggressive arm cranking. Orton misses a charge into the post and the arm is suddenly in bad shape. The arm is sent into the barricade but Orton’s legs are fine enough to score with a kick on the way back in.

We take a break and come back with Orton hammering away (with the good arm) in the corner. A dropkick gives Orton two and we hit the chinlock. Orton grabs a suplex and gets in the circle stomp to keep things slow. The big knee drop gets two as JR says Orton isn’t looking to make a mistake. How does one exactly “look to make a mistake”?

Anyway they head outside with HHH being sent into the steps for two, meaning we’re right back to the chinlock. HHH fights up but charges into a boot, allowing Orton to load up a blocked RKO. The facebuster and a clothesline put Orton down but he’s right back with a powerslam for two of his own.

The backbreaker gives Orton two more, only to have HHH crotch him on top. There’s the superplex for a delayed HHH two but the Pedigree and RKO are both countered. HHH grabs the crossface….and we go to the back, where William Regal says he isn’t having this disrespect. The fans who booed him earlier don’t deserve to see this match so the feed is cut. JR and King keep doing commentary as the black screen takes us out.

Rating: B-. That was certainly a unique ending but the match itself wasn’t that great on the way there. HHH and Orton have some chemistry together, but I’ve yet to see them really get to that epic match. The good thing is that this should get rid of the rematch clause for now, but you can almost guarantee another match at the pay per view. Some people just can’t get to that next level and save for maybe once before, that would apply to these two as well.

Overall Rating: C. This was a weird show as the Regal stuff and main event were both good, along with what feels like the start of Shawn vs. Jericho, but everything else was fast or bad. Regal going insane works rather well though, and we could be in for quite the run from him going forward. That makes for quite the different stretch of two hours, though it feels like we’re getting something of a sequel to Backlash at Judgment Day. That’s an odd way to go, but Backlash was rather good so it might work out very well.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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