Impact Wrestling – June 1, 2023: I Don’t Know If I Can Say That Anymore

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 1, 2023
Location: Western Fair District Agriplex, London, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

It’s the first show after Under Siege and a lot of things took place at the show. First and foremost, Steve Maclin retained the World Title by defending PCO but Bully Ray attacked Scott D’Amore to end the show, even putting him through a flaming table. Other than that, we have a new #1 contender in the form of Alex Shelley, who will get a World Title shot at Against All Odds. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Under Siege recap.

Here is Bully Ray to get things going and no one is happy to see him. He has been putting people through tables throughout his career and no one is better at it in wrestling history. We hear about some of the people who he has put through them over the years, but the really bad ones are the people he puts through flaming tables. That’s what he did to Scott D’Amore and there is no one here to stop him.

Now it is on to Against All Odds, where he can become #1 contender and then to Slammiversary to win the World Title. Cue World Champion Steve Maclin to interrupt to say he liked what happened to D’Amore. What Bully needs to understand though is Maclin allowed Ray to hurt D’Amore like that. Ray tells him to shut up and says no one tells him what he can do….but then backtracks and says Maclin is the World Champion and can do what he wants. Maclin proposes a partnership, but he’s also cool with the idea of beating Ray at Slammiversary if he has to.

Cue the Motor City Machine Guns to interrupt, with Alex Shelley saying he’s leaving Against All Odds with the World Title. Ray says that usually he would rip Shelley apart on the might but the reality is that Shelley is one of the best in the world. He has seen wrestlers in the locker room watching Shelley matches, but Shelley must be bothered by never winning the big one.

Chris Sabin brings up beating Ray for the World Title but Maclin cuts him off to yell at Shelley for the lack of respect. Shelley says “yep” when asked if he thinks he can win the title but Maclin asks why it will be different this time. Shelley says it’s because Maclin is no Josh Alexander, which makes Ray laugh. That doesn’t make sense to Shelley, because Alexander beat Ray too. We finally get the challenge for the tag match tonight and Ray likes the idea….but not tonight.

Cue Subculture (Mark Andrews/Flash Morgan Webster/Dani Luna, formerly of NXT UK) as this segment is somehow still going. Subculture wants to face the Guns tonight and that match is on. This was nearly twenty minutes long and felt WAY out of place on an Impact show, especially when the only match made was from people who popped up at the end. I know they don’t have much time before Against All Odds but please don’t let this WWE style segment become normal around here.

Nick Aldis feels dangerous when he is in a nice suit like this but he feels all the more dangerous when he has momentum behind him. He praises Kenny King for a great match at Under Siege and King will be even more ready whenever they face off again. As for Against All Odds, Aldis is ready for the 8-4-1 match (starts off as an eight man tag, with the winning team immediately having a four way to crown a new #1 contender) because he’ll have to adapt, which is what he does best. Then he’s winning the World Title.

Eddie Edwards vs. Yuya Uemura

Alisha Edwards is here with Eddie. Feeling out process to start with Uemura grabbing an armdrag into an armbar. Back up and Eddie takes him into the corner for some chops, only to have a forearm knock Eddie outside. The slingshot dive drops Eddie again though and we take a break. Back with Uemura fighting out of a chinlock but getting taken right back down.

This time Uemura fights up with a running clothesline and a belly to back suplex gets two. Edwards tries a double underhook but gets backdropped away, only to have Alisha distract Uemura on the top. That means a superplex can bring Uemura back down but Uemura cuts off the Boston Knee Party with a dropkick. The swinging Rock Bottom sets up a high crossbody, which is kneed out of the air. The tiger driver gives Edwards two and the Boston Knee Party finally finishes Uemura at 13:30.

Rating: B. They had a good match here as Uemura continues to get better and better every week. Commentary is right when they say that he needs a big win, but I’m not sure how much longer he is going to be here on excursion in the first place. If that’s the case, just how far does Impact want to push him? For now, I guess they’ll have to settle for a good hand who can work well with anyone.

Post match Eddie teases respect but pulls away from the handshake. Cue Frankie Kazarian to say that isn’t how we do this around here and the fight is on, with Eddie being dropped. Alisha tries to jump on Frankie and is dropped as well, allowing Kazarian to leave.

Decay vs. Sami Callihan/Jake Crist

Crist bites Steve to start and hands it off to Callihan, only to have Taurus come in and clear the ring. That’s not enough for Taurus, who throws Steve over the top onto both of them. Back in and Crist starts firing off superkicks for a breather, followed by putting Steve on Taurus’ shoulders. Callihan puts Crist on his own shoulders for a cutter to Steve and the pin at 1:35. Cool finisher and dang that went fast.

Post match here is the Design to lay out Crist and Callihan. Rich Swann makes the save.

Post break, Swann, Crist and Callihan are ready for Against All Odds….but Swann already has a spot in the 8-4-1 match. Callihan and Crist understand so they can find someone else. Callihan says the doctor is going to have to call the fox.

Trinity vs. Savannah Evans

Jai Vidal and Gisele Shaw are here with Evans. Trinity grabs a waistlock to start and gets backed into the corner for her efforts. A headlock takeover doesn’t work for Trinity so she forearms away in the corner. Evans plants her with a powerbomb for two and Trinity is in trouble. Back in and Trinity gets smart by hitting a springboard kick to the face to put Evans down. A side slam cuts Trinity off but she pulls Evans into the reverse Rings of Saturn for the tap at 4:33.

Rating: C+. Evans continues to work as a monster but that is only going to have so much impact if she keeps losing all the time. Trinity is someone who is probably going to wind up being near the top of the division sooner rather than later so her winning here makes all of the sense. They went back and forth here for a few minutes but ultimately, Trinity winning was the only option.

Post match Trinity gets the mic and says she wants the Knockouts Title. Cue Deonna Purrazzo to say ask her to her face. Trinity issues the challenge for Slammiversary and Purrazzo is in. Shaw, Evans and Vidal are up for the beatdown though, only to have Jordynne Grace come in for the save. That doesn’t exactly work though as she is beaten down as well, setting up a pair of knees from Shaw.

Dani Luna vs. Jody Threat

Dani Luna is part of Subculture, who are here with her. Threat headlocks her over to start but Luna does the exact same. Luna powers her into the corner but gets sunset flipped for two. Threat knocks her back down and scores with a heck of a Cactus Clothesline. Threat’s running flip dive off the apron, followed by the running knee to the back. Luna has had it with this and hits a powerbomb for two and a hard lariat gets the same. Threat snaps off a German suplex and hits a reverse F5 (the F Bomb) for the pin at 7:05.

Rating: B-. This was a hard hitting fight and it worked well with what they were doing. Impact has done a nice job of turning Threat into…well, a threat, and that’s what they need to do every so often. Threat is someone who feels like she has been built from the ground up and could become something around here. On the other hand you have Luna, who could do well as a powerhouse with a unique look.

Santino Marella and Joe Hendry are talking about Dirty Dango when Sheldon Jean and Kenny King come in. King thinks Jean should get a match with Hendry, so Santino makes it for next week. As for Against All Odds, Hendry can defend his Digital Media Title against Dango. Works for Hendry.

We look at Killer Kelly and Masha Slamovich brawling at Under Siege. A chain was involved.

Kelly wants a dog collar match with Slamovich. Her talk about giving in to your natural instinct is designed to make various suggestions.

Here is what’s coming on various shows.

Subculture vs. Motor City Machine Guns

Shelley and Andrews get things going with Shelley’s armdrag not getting him very far. Sabin comes in to headlock Webster to little avail as Webster grabs an armdrag of his own. Everything breaks down and the Guns send Andrews outside to kick Webster down. Back in and Andrews gets kicked down as well, allowing Shelley to grab a cross arm choke on Webster.

Back up and Webster gets Shelley into the corner for a quick dropkick to the leg. Subculture hits back to back flips onto Sabin to send him outside as well, setting up the stereo suicide dives. Back in and the Guns hit some clotheslines to take over and we take a break. We come back with Andrews being caught in a surfboard for a bulldog from Sabin. The chinlock goes on for a bit but Andrews fights up, allowing the tag off to Webster. Everything breaks down again and Webster hits a springboard moonsault to drop both Guns.

Webster hits a big dive onto Sabin and a double Falcon Arrow (that’s a new one) gets two back inside. Shelley comes back in for the save and house is cleaned, including a Death Valley Driver/running neckbreaker combination (that’s a new one too). A Magic Killer (that’s not a new one) gets two on Andrews but he pops up off a Doomsday dropkick.

Shelley is knocked outside, leaving Sabin to clothesline both of them inside out. Cradle Shock is countered into a Stundog Millionaire (sweet) but Webster misses a 450. Sabin grabs a cutter on Webster and the Dream Sequence hits Andrews. The Dirt Bomb finishes Webster off at 16:13.

Rating: B+. There are certain matches that are designed to have talented stars letting it all hang out and hitting one big move after another until someone finally gets pinned. That is what you had here and this was an awesome TV main event. The Guns can still hang with anyone and if Subculture wants a job in Impact, there is a good chance that they got one here. Great stuff here and worth a look if you have time.

Overall Rating: B. I find myself looking forward to Impact more and more each week and that was the case again here. The opener and main event (especially the latter) are both rather awesome TV matches and the rapid fire build to Against All Odds wasn’t bad at all. Cut down on the way too long opening segment and this show is probably the best TV show of the week. Awesome stuff here, as I’m starting to wonder if it’s still fair to say Impact is on a roll, as this has been going on for a long time now.

Results
Eddie Edwards b. Yuya Uemura – Boston Knee Party
Sami Callihan/Jake Crist b. Decay – Elevated cutter to Steve
Trinity b. Savannah Evans – Reverse Rings of Saturn
Jody Threat b. Dani Luna – F Bomb
Motor City Machine Guns b. Subculture – Dirt Bomb to Webster

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – May 5, 2008: Lights Out (Again)

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 5, 2008
Location: Air Canada Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 16,664
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We are less than two weeks away from Judgment Day and we have a bit of a crazy boss. Last week saw General Manager William Regal crowned as King, though the power seems to have already gone to his head as he cut the show off so fans who booed him couldn’t see the ending. Mr. Kennedy isn’t happy and it might be time to deal with things. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of William Regal going all scooters last week.

Here is Vince McMahon to say Regal pulled the plug in the end of a title match. This has led to a variety of protests from the fans, with many of them demanding that Vince appear tonight. However, McMahon finds Regal’s actions to be visionary, so Regal reminds Vince of himself! He is all for Regal’s actions and no punishment is coming.

Here is Regal for a chat. Regal doesn’t like the fans disrespecting him again here….so turn out the lights again. He has the lights turned back on but says he won’t be disrespected. Cue Mr. Kennedy to interrupt, saying all Regal has to do is agree to face him. Instead, Regal puts him in the main event against…..the entire ECW roster (or about six members). This is part of a deal with Armando Alejandro Estrada to promote tomorrow’s 100th ECW, but here is HHH to interrupt.

Just like Mr. Kennedy Kennedy here, HHH means no disrespect and tells Regal to not make mistakes. Last week, Regal cutting the lights off during HHH’s match and disrespecting him would be mistakes. HHH says Regal doesn’t want a war with him, but Regal says HHH already has to defend the title against Randy Orton in a cage at Judgment Day. As for tonight, HHH can join Mr. Kennedy in the main event against ECW. Regal is absolutely nailing it here and Kennedy is feeling like quite the rebel.

Women’s Title: Beth Phoenix vs. Mickie James

James is defending in a lumberjack match. Beth easily powers her around to start and gets two off a running shoulder. With James on the floor, the evil lumberjacks get in their required cheap shots but James is right back with a neckbreaker. The lumberjacks get into their big fight (at least they didn’t waste time here) and we take an early break. Back with Beth cranking on both arms until Mickie fights up and dropkicks her way to freedom. The top rope Thesz press gets two and Beth is sent outside for a beating. In the melee, Melina goes for Mickie but hits Beth by mistake, allowing Mickie to grab a small package to retain.

Rating: C. This was all about the insanity going on around the ring while Mickie and Beth were just kind of in the middle. There are a lot of women in the division but there aren’t many who are ready to go after the title. That is going to have to change, but for now it’s likely going to be Mickie/Beth/Melina.

Chris Jericho comes up to see William Regal, who asks about Shawn Michaels’ knee. Jericho is sure that Shawn is faking, which doesn’t go well for him because tonight it’s Jericho/Shawn vs. Miz/John Morrison.

Trevor Murdoch is singing when Trish Stratus comes in to look confused. Ron Simmons shows up for his cameo line.

Randy Orton doesn’t agree with the idea that HHH had him beaten last week but that’s not the point. As for tonight, he has CM Punk, who might cash in Money In The Bank on him when Orton gets the title back in two weeks.

Katie Lea Burchill/Paul Burchill vs. John Cutler

Hold on though as William Regal pops up to say Jim Ross isn’t going to call this match. Instead, here is Mike Adamle to take the spot, leaving Ross looking rather annoyed. Paul chops him up against the ropes as Katie seems rather pleased. A knee drop lets Katie stomp away and we hit the chinlock. Back up and Cutler tries to roll Katie up, earning a stomping from Paul. The top rope double stomp from Katie sets up the single version from Paul, giving Katie the pin.

Rating: D+. There’s something to be said about Katie being the focal point here as she has the charisma to get noticed, but I’m not sure where this is going to go. The bigger focus being on the commentary didn’t help either, but the Burchills are at least different. Paul still has the intensity to make something like this work, though it hasn’t exactly gotten there yet.

Chris Jericho comes up to Shawn Michaels in the back. Shawn says he’s really hurt but he’ll do his best, as always. Jericho doesn’t seem to buy it.

Chris Jericho/Shawn Michaels vs. Miz/John Morrison

Non-title, JR is back on commentary and Shawn is badly limping on the way to the ring. Jericho and Miz start things off with Jericho hitting a quick suplex. Morrison comes in to kick away in the corner, setting up the springboard spinning kick to the face. It’s right back to Miz, who is quickly pulled into the Walls. Morrison makes the save so Shawn comes in with Sweet Chin Music, leaving him writhing in pain. A quick Lionsault gives Jericho the pin.

Rating: C. This was more storyline advancement than anything else as Michaels is either telling the truth or milking the heck out of faking the injury. It’s an interesting story as it could go either way, which is something you don’t get very often. If nothing else, Jericho being all smug and knowing that Shawn is faking it is making for good TV. Now just stop pinning the champs and it’s that much better.

Shawn needs help getting to the back and Jericho is confused.

CM Punk vs. Randy Orton

Orton starts fast by sending him to the apron and then down to the floor in a crash. Back in and Orton starts the circle stomp but misses the knee drop. Punk kicks away but misses a springboard spinning crossbody. Back up and Punk kicks away, setting up the knee into the corner and the bulldog right back out of it. Cue William Regal though and let’s turn out the lights because this match is over.

Rating: C. Well that’s certainly a different way to go and this Regal stuff is getting more interesting. It’s not often that you see someone actually shaking things up like this and it’s making things feel different. Sometimes that is the way you need tog o and making Orton mad is going to be an upgrade as well. The match was energetic while it lasted but it didn’t exactly have time to go anywhere before the storyline ending.

Post break Orton is livid and goes to find Regal for some answers.

It’s time for Carlito’s Cabana. We look at Roddy Piper making a surprise appearance last week and slapping Santino Marella in the face. Therefore, here is Piper as this week’s guest. Carlito says he gets that Santino can be annoying but Piper took it too far. Piper: “Listen Buckwheat.”

We hear about Piper taking it too far every time, including when he beat cancer. He’s not going to apologize for anything, including not wanting to sit and talk about what he did. Carlito says he would have slapped Piper back but Piper says Carlito should be glad that Piper didn’t bring a seagull to make a next in Carlito’s hair.

Cue Santino Marella to mock Piper for taking so long to become Intercontinental Champion. Piper brings up Santino’s recent DUI, but here is Cody Rhodes to interrupt. Now it’s Cryme Tyme (Piper: “HOLY COW!”) and the villains (oddly enough not including Piper) bail. The good guys dance. This was there to get Piper on the show and for the dancing at the end, but the seemingly endless Carlito/Marella Tag Team Title chase is dragging things down.

Post break Cryme Tyme is still in the ring and thinks they have a lot of stuff to sell around here. They have a hammock and coconuts! Selling ensues and a lot of money changes hands (with a fan getting the hammock).

Judgment Day rundown.

JBL is standing next to his limo and offers to share his lifestyle. We go inside the limo for a ride into the arena, with JBL talking about all of the features in the limo (full bar, high speed internet). This was a very JBL thing to do and it worked.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. DH Smith

Before the match, JBL talks about Smith’s father but says the British Bulldog can’t help him. The beating is on fast and the Clothesline From JBL finishes in about a minute.

Post match the big beating is on until referees break it up.

William Regal tells the ECW roster to get it together tonight because they have a big mission. The team goes to the ring, with Kane glaring at Regal as he leaves.

Smackdown Rebound.

HHH/Mr. Kennedy vs. ECW Roster

One fall to a finish. Kennedy and Elijah Burke start things off with Kennedy grabbing a front facelock and handing it off to HHH. The jumping knee drops Matt Striker so it’s quickly off to Mike Knox. The villains (mostly at least) take over on HHH, who shrugs it off and brings Kennedy back in. Tommy Dreamer grabs a snap suplex and brings in Kofi Kingston, only to have Shelton Benjamin tag himself in. The distraction lets HHH come back in and everything breaks down. Kane chokeslams Kennedy but Bam Neeley jumps Kane, allowing Chavo Guerrero to hit a frog splash for the pin.

Rating: C. These things are always weird as there is only so much you can do with two vs. more than a dozen wrestlers. ECW was more or less rotating wrestlers in and out and the real focus here was on the visual of having that many people out there. I’m not sure how much of a punishment it was, but at least it wasn’t the same stuff we see every week.

Post match the big brawl is on with HHH cleaning house but the lights go out. They come back up and it’s Randy Orton with an RKO to HHH to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The Regal stuff is interesting and that is what the show needed given how weak the wrestling was this week. There is only so much you can get out of a bunch of weak matches and a kind of strange Roddy Piper segment and this show proved it. Hopefully this was just a one off weak show, as there are pieces, like Jericho vs. Shawn, there that could help carry the weak portions.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – April 28, 2008: He Does Good Crazy

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 28, 2008
Location: IZOD Center, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 17,166
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with Backlash and the big story is that HHH won the Raw World Title from Randy Orton in the four way main event. That alone should be enough to make things interesting tonight but we also have Shawn Michaels defeating Batista after taking advantage of his own knee injury. That sounds like it could go somewhere, so let’s get to it.

Here is Backlash if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of HHH winning the Raw World Title in last night’s four way elimination match.

Here is HHH to get things going, complete with big shiny belt. HHH declares The Age Of Orton officially dead and now we pause because they are chanting his name. Eight months ago, he wasn’t sure if he was ever going to return to the ring and now he knows that The Game is back. Cue Randy Orton to interrupt and he isn’t overly pleased. Orton talks about how the odds were stacked against him last night but HHH brings up Orton being all confident before the match. Now he’s the victim? Orton: “The victim of my own success. I was so dominant they wouldn’t put me against anyone one on one.”

HHH thinks Orton liked the idea of hiding behind these multiman matches but Orton has already got the rematch set for Judgment Day in less than three weeks. HHH says he bragged too, but in his case, it was the truth. Orton gets in his face and is knocked out with a single shot, sending Orton to the floor. He’ll just have his rematch clause tonight instead. They got to the point pretty fast here.

Post break, the title match is on.

Mickie James/Maria/Ashley/Michelle McCool/Cherry/Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian Hall/Natalya/Victoria/Layla

Backlash rematch and it’s a big brawl before the bell rings. We settle down for the opening bell and Beth decking Kelly from behind. Beth powers her straight into the corner and hands it off to Victoria. The spinning side slam is countered into a headscissors but Victoria takes her straight into the corner. Melina’s running/screaming hip attack in the corner gets two and Jillian comes in, only to miss her handspring elbow. Mickie comes in to clean house and gets a bridging rollup to pin Jillian.

Rating: D+. Well they made good time, but a twelve woman match where half of them don’t get in isn’t exactly a rampaging success. They didn’t have time to do anything here and this would have been better off as a two on two tag match instead. There is some talent in the division, but with only the Raw title to fight over, it leaves a lot of them without much to do save for appearances like this one.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Robbie McCallister

Rory is here with Robbie and the beating is on quickly. The Clothesline from JBL finishes at around a minute, which has me wondering if this was punishment for Robbie popping up in the crowd at Impact around Wrestlemania the previous month.

Post match JBL grabs a headset and blames John Cena for not winning the title last night. He wants the winner of tonight’s title match.

Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. Trevor Murdoch/Lance Cade

Cade and London start things off with Cade hitting a high backdrop for an early two. Murdoch comes in to hammer away as the fans are dubbing this boring. London slips away and brings in Kendrick to pick up the pace, with Murdoch screaming at Cade. Murdoch comes in and is promptly rolled up for the pin.

Post match Murdoch grabs the mic, gets on the announcers’ table, and since I Got Friends In Low Places. Cade is adequately confused by the whole thing.

We look at Shawn Michaels tweaking his knee last night against Batista but rolling him up for the pin anyway.

Paul Burchill/Katie Lea Burchill vs. Super Crazy

Before the match, Katie thanks William Regal for making this a handicap match. Paul wastes no time in taking Crazy down, allowing Katie to hit a running boot to the face. Crazy avoids a charge in the corner though and kicks Paul down. The moonsault misses though and Katie’s missile dropkick sets up the curb stomp to give Paul the face pin. Short and to the point here.

Randy Orton is asked if he has second thoughts about using his rematch clause tonight. Orton: “No.”

And now, the official coronation of William Regal (thank goodness it isn’t one of those knockoffs). Regal, on the throne in the ring, says (in between some hardcore WHATing) he will now be General Manager AND King because he has earned both titles. You will have no choice but to respect and fear him, because he is your ruler, better and…..here’s Mr. Kennedy to interrupt.

Kennedy can’t congratulate Regal for the win because he wasn’t even in the tournament in the first place. He hits the catchphrase but Regal cuts him off and says get an appointment/make an apology. Kennedy teases an apology before switching to his catchphrase instead. Regal punches him down and referees have to make it up. Kennedy felt more like a star here and I was feeling the hype that he has had for so long here. This worked, and that’s kind of a rare thing for Kennedy these days.

Cody Rhodes vs. Santino Marella

Hardcore Holly and Carlito are here too. Before the match, Santino says he DOES NOT like the fake Italians on the Sopranos, which is set right here in New Jersey. Santino actually knocks him down and hammers away a bit to start before dodging a high crossbody. We hit the chinlock for a bit before a hard hiptoss (yes a hiptoss) of all things gets two. Rhodes fights up and hits a quick DDT for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one, but the bigger problem continues to be how long these teams have been feuding. There are other teams around, but for some reason these two have to feud for the better part of ever. Rhodes and Holly have already beaten them, so why are we still stuck on this feud?

Post match Cody mocks Santino’s accent and gets taken down with the Backstabber.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel and Chris Jericho is in a tuxedo. Jericho is here to present an award for the Best Actor in Sports Entertainment. The nominees are:

Mr. Fuji and the Magnificent Muraco in Fuji General
Michael Cole in Deliverance Part II (as in the infamous Heidenreich segment, complete with banjo music)
Shawn Michaels pretending to have a knee injury at Backlash

Why yes, Shawn does win, so here he is to accept, limping all the way down the ramp. Jericho wants an acceptance speech, but Shawn insists that he is really hurt. That doesn’t go well with Jericho, who thinks Shawn goes from good to bad faster than anyone. Shawn would even try superkicking him with the bad leg if there was no podium between them. That doesn’t get anything from Shawn, so Jericho has Shawn’s music play before leaving. I think we might be coming back to this one.

Santino Marella bumps into a woman he finds attractive….but it’s really Roddy Piper. Santino brings up the Goonies music video but Piper has no time for this. There’s your bizarre cameo of the week.

We recap HHH winning the Raw World Title last night.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Randy Orton

HHH is defending and we even get a weapons check to make it feel special. They fight over a lockup to start and go straight to the staredown. A shoulder puts HHH down and Orton grabs a headlock to grind away a bit. HHH is right back with a headlock of his own, followed by some aggressive arm cranking. Orton misses a charge into the post and the arm is suddenly in bad shape. The arm is sent into the barricade but Orton’s legs are fine enough to score with a kick on the way back in.

We take a break and come back with Orton hammering away (with the good arm) in the corner. A dropkick gives Orton two and we hit the chinlock. Orton grabs a suplex and gets in the circle stomp to keep things slow. The big knee drop gets two as JR says Orton isn’t looking to make a mistake. How does one exactly “look to make a mistake”?

Anyway they head outside with HHH being sent into the steps for two, meaning we’re right back to the chinlock. HHH fights up but charges into a boot, allowing Orton to load up a blocked RKO. The facebuster and a clothesline put Orton down but he’s right back with a powerslam for two of his own.

The backbreaker gives Orton two more, only to have HHH crotch him on top. There’s the superplex for a delayed HHH two but the Pedigree and RKO are both countered. HHH grabs the crossface….and we go to the back, where William Regal says he isn’t having this disrespect. The fans who booed him earlier don’t deserve to see this match so the feed is cut. JR and King keep doing commentary as the black screen takes us out.

Rating: B-. That was certainly a unique ending but the match itself wasn’t that great on the way there. HHH and Orton have some chemistry together, but I’ve yet to see them really get to that epic match. The good thing is that this should get rid of the rematch clause for now, but you can almost guarantee another match at the pay per view. Some people just can’t get to that next level and save for maybe once before, that would apply to these two as well.

Overall Rating: C. This was a weird show as the Regal stuff and main event were both good, along with what feels like the start of Shawn vs. Jericho, but everything else was fast or bad. Regal going insane works rather well though, and we could be in for quite the run from him going forward. That makes for quite the different stretch of two hours, though it feels like we’re getting something of a sequel to Backlash at Judgment Day. That’s an odd way to go, but Backlash was rather good so it might work out very well.

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – April 27, 2023: This Show Is Darn Nifty

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 27, 2023
Location: Rebel Entertainment Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

The end of last week’s show saw a big announcement as PCO will be getting the first shot at Steve Maclin’s World Title. That alone is going to make for a heck of a showdown at Under Siege, but the card is going to need more than just one match. There are a few options available and we will probably find out some of them tonight so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Masha Slamovich vs. Jordynne Grace

Grace shoulders her down to start and then does it again, setting up a wristlock. Slamovich tries an armbar but gets powered into the corner, where Grace hits the running Vader Bomb for two. It’s too early for the Grace Driver as Slamovich sends her into the rope for a shot to the throat. Slamovich gets in a shot to the face and rips at said face for a bonus.

There’s a neck snap across the top rope but Grace catches her in the corner and hits a MuscleBuster for two. Slamovich charges into a Michinoku driver for two more before Grace pulls her into a rear naked choke. That’s reversed into Slamovich’s choke, plus a leg trap belly to back suplex for two. They go into a pinfall reversal sequence for a series of ones until Grace stacks her up for the pin at 11:02.

Rating: B-. These two work well together, but it is kind of astounding to see how far Slamovich has fallen. Maybe it is the Russian aspect, but she has gone from what seemed to be the next big thing in the division to just kind of there. While it could still change, I’m not seeing much of a reason to believe that she is going to go further than she is right now. At least not for the time being.

We get a look back at Nick Aldis’ history in Impact, which led to him leading to see if he could be a star without being Magnus. Then he became the NWA World Champion for over 1,000 days and now it is time to see if he can still do it around here.

Joe Hendry has a broke nose. No word on how long he might be out.

Here is Steve Maclin for a chat. Maclin gets to the point: he doesn’t want to wait for Under Siege, so PCO can come out here right now. Cue Champagne Singh and Shera to jump PCO, who fights them both off. Cue Santino Marella and we have a match right now.

PCO vs. Champagne Singh

There are no seconds as PCO sends him to the floor to start. There’s the running flip dive to drop Singh but he’s back with a dropkick and Codebreaker. PCO isn’t happy with Singh bringing out money though and it’s a Backstabber out of the corner. The middle rope flipping splash connects and there’s the DeAnimator to make it worse. A reverse DDT sets up the PCOsault to finish Singh at 5:30.

Rating: C. This was what it needed to be, as PCO ran through someone who shouldn’t give him a problem. PCO has taken out much bigger stars around here and it isn’t like Singh or Shera has any real credibility. Nothing match, but PCO looked good in a pretty dominant win and that’s what they needed to do here.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Magnus b. Christopher Daniels on Impact, February 14, 2013.

The Design is mad at Sami Callihan.

The Coven uses magic to weaken Deonna Purrazzo before Taylor Wilde faces her tonight. They laugh a lot.

Here is Johnny Swinger, with Zicky Dice, to face a luchador that Dice has paid for personally. There’s a language barrier though, so Dice goes to get him.

Johnny Swinger vs. El Dinerico

I have a feeling you know what is going on here. A drop toehold and la majistral finishes Dinerico at 27 seconds.

Post break Swinger and Dice celebrate their win but Santino Marella comes in to say that doesn’t count. Swinger fires Dice, who is so upset he speaks Spanish.

Kenny King won a match on BTI and yelled at commentary.

After mocking the guy he beat, King talked to Sheldon Jean, who has untapped potential. Jean doesn’t seem interested, but King eventually intrigues him.

Design vs. Bullet Club

Non-title and it’s Angels/Kon with Deaner for the Design. Angels slugs away at Bey as commentary thankfully says that a lot of people were expecting Sami Callihan to turn on the team. Bey takes over on Angels so it’s off to Kon, who is quickly kicked in the head. Kon runs them both over though and throws Bey outside in a (possibly ankle injuring) heap. We see Santino Marella down in the back and come back to Kon putting Austin in a nerve hold.

Austin fights out of the corner and avoids a charge, setting up a kick to the face. Bey comes back in with a Code Red to Angels but Kon grabs him, setting up a springboard Russian legsweep (that was cool). With Kon on the floor, the Club take turns diving at him to limited avail. Cue Callihan to go after Deaner, leaving the Club to finally drop Kon with a double dive. Back in and the 1 2 Sweet finishes Angels at 8:26.

Rating: C+. It says a lot about the Bullet Club that they were able to get something decent out of these schmucks. The Design continues to be one of the most worthless acts in wrestling and having Callihan come out there to hurt their leader was almost cathartic in a way. Just get the feud over with so hopefully they can move on to anything else, because this is somehow getting less interesting by the week.

Santino Marella was attacked and is told he needs to take some time off. Dirty Dango resigns as assistant Director of Authority (with Santino reminding him that he never such a thing in the first place) to become DETECTIVE of Authority. Someone has to solve the mystery of who jumped Santino you see.

The Death Dollz don’t have the power to get back to the Undead Realm without the Knockouts Tag Team Titles. Crazzy Steve comes in and, after being amazed by how excited Jessicka is about meeting him, suggests that they talk to James Mitchell. Rosemary doesn’t like it but agrees.

Jody Threat vs. Seleziya Sparx

Jody drives her into the corner to start and grabs the wristlock to keep things on the mat. Back up and Threat gets sent to the apron, only to come back with a top rope seated senton. Some corner clotheslines set up a release German suplex, followed by the F416 to finish Sparx at 4:21.

Rating: C. I still do not get the appeal of Threat, who has yet to show me much of anything in her time around here. She’s not bad or having terrible matches, but rather just coming and going without making any real impression. Then again, I do like the idea of putting in some fresh names so points for at least trying something.

Killer Kelly really liked Hardcore War and wants more violence.

We get the first in a series of sitdown interviews with Frankie Kazarian. He got his break in Impact in 2003 and became a star in the X-Division. It was the tale end of the wild west of wrestling though and he didn’t want to become one of the good old boys who clutched to their spot. Then he left in 2014 after doing all kinds of things here, but management was such a mess (we get a clip of Dixie Carter clutching to Hulk Hogan’s leg, begging him to stay) that he decided to walk away. More next week after a more interesting first part than I was expecting.

Here’s what’s coming on future shows.

Knockouts Title: Taylor Wilde vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Wilde, with KiLynn King, is challenging. They circle each other for a bit to start before Wilde takes out the leg to put them both on the mat. Purrazzo reverses into an armbar but it gets broken up for an early standoff. An armdrag into an armbar has Wilde in more trouble but King offers a distraction for the break. Wilde gets in a cheap shot from behind but takes too long posing, allowing Purrazzo to try for the Fujiwara armbar. With that not working, Wilde consults her cards and we take a break.

Back with Wilde being sent outside, allowing Purrazzo to deck King. That lets Wilde get in another shot to take over, with King even getting in the neck snap of retribution. Wilde steps on the hair and pulls up like a good villain, only to be knocked into the corner. They collide in the middle for a double knockdown and they get a breather. Wilde grabs a German suplex but gets pulled into the Fujiwara armbar for the tap at 12:56.

Rating: B-. Another nice back and forth match here as Purrazzo dispatches an early challenger for the title. Wilde taking the loss doesn’t hurt her title reign with King and it was a pretty competitive match. You can probably pencil in King for a title shot of her own and I’ve heard worse ideas for everyone involved.

Post match the beatdown is on but Jordynne Grace makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. People who needed to win did so and aside from the Design, there was nothing that felt like a waste of time. In other words, it’s more of the same solid stuff from Impact that we’ve been seeing for months now. What matters is setting up Under Siege and you can see some of those matches coming from here. They still have time to set it up and odds are we’ll be seeing something more next week. For now, it’s a show that did enough good to make me want to see what happens next.

Results
Jordynne Grace b. Masha Slamovich – Rollup
PCO b. Champagne Singh – PCOsault
Johnny Swinger b. El Dinerico – La majistral
Bullet Club b. The Design – 1 2 Sweet to Angels
Jody Threat b. Seleziya Sparx – F416
Deonna Purrazzo b. Taylor Wilde – Fujiwara armbar

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – April 20, 2023: Dang This Stuff Works

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 20, 2023
Location: Rebel Entertainment Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We are done with Rebellion and the biggest story is the new World Champion, having defeated Kushida to win the vacant title. At the same time, Deonna Purrazzo is once again Knockouts Champion, having defeated Jordynne Grace for the vacant title in the show’s main event. Let’s get to it.

Here is Rebellion if you need a recap.

We look at the new champions being crowned at Rebellion.

Mike Bailey/Jonathan Gresham/Trey Miguel vs. Time Machine

Gresham and Shelley go technical to start for a standoff so it’s off to Bailey vs. Sabin. An armbar has Bailey in trouble as commentary points out that everyone but Miguel lost at Rebellion. Kushida comes in and gets sent into the corner, where Miguel rakes his back. That doesn’t last long as Kushida gets over to his own corner, allowing all of Time Machine to crank on Miguel’s arm.

It’s off to Bailey, who gets caught in the Tree of Woe for a triple dropkick as the dominance continues. Shelley starts in on Bailey’s arm before it’s back to Kushida, who kicks Gresham and Miguel off the apron in a smart move. Everything breaks down and Sabin hits a suicide dive onto Gresham and Miguel as we take a break.

Back with Bailey’s arm still in trouble but he kicks his way to freedom. Gresham comes in and gets to face Kushida with Gresham getting a series of near falls. Sabin accidentally kicks Shelley in the chest though and it’s Miguel getting to clean house. Bailey busts out the slingshot springboard moonsault onto the pile on the floor but Kushida Hoverboard Locks Miguel. Time Machine all get submission holds on at once and we take another break.

Back again with Miguel knocking Kushida into the corner. That doesn’t last long as it’s back to Sabin, who gets to slug it out with Shelley. Bailey kicks him down and this the moonsault double knees to the chest. Sabin is back up with a German superplex and Shelley/Kushida break up the tag attempts. Bailey manages the Ultimate Weapon to a standing Sabin’s back as everything breaks down. The parade of strikes to the face leads to Kushida kicking Miguel in the face, setting up Cradle Shock for the pin at 26:35.

Rating: B. Like this wasn’t going to work. They had all six guys getting time and Bailey getting beaten up. What else could you want in a match? The ending even sets up Sabin (though Kushida and Shelley could be right there too) as Miguel’s next challenger, which boosts up the competition a good bit. Very solid opener here as they let six talented people have a long, long TV match and it worked.

Santino Marella is happy with his in-ring return but says he won’t be returning to the ring very often. Alisha Edwards interrupts to to yell about PCO but Santino sends her to the ring for her match. Gia Miller: “Did she have a match tonight?” Santino: “She does now.” Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice come in to ask about Swinger’s match but Santino says he can’t keep wasting resources on a loser. Dice has found the world’s greatest luchador though, and he’ll even pay for said luchador’s appearance and transportation. Even Santino is down with that.

Video on Deonna Purrazzo, the new Knockouts Champion.

Alisha Edwards vs. Tara Rysing

Alisha takes Tara into the corner to start and sends her flying without much effort. Tara manages a clothesline out of the corner but gets sent outside. Back in and an X Factor finishes Rysing at 2:27.

Post match Edwards stays on Tara but Jody Threat makes the save.

Post break Threat promises to take care of Edwards for Rysing.

Moose vs. Yuya Uemura

Brian Myers and Bhupinder Gujjar are here too. Moose takes him straight into the corner to start but gets pulled into an armbar. With Moose on the floor, Uemura loads up a dive but Myers takes the impact for him. That earns Uemura an apron bomb and Moose shoves him around back inside. Uemura fights up but Myers offers a distraction, allowing Moose to knock him back down.

Back in and Uemura hits a dropkick, followed by a middle rope bulldog for two. Moose suplexes his way out of a suplex but gets caught in a German suplex. Uemura’s high crossbody is broken up so Moose goes up, only to get belly to back superplexed down. Now the high crossbody can connect but Myers offers the distraction. Gujjar goes after him but Moose sends Umeura throat first into the top rope. The spear finishes Uemura at 9:57.

Rating: C+. Power vs. speed with interference mixed in worked well enough here and Uemura is feeling more and more like a player every week. He’s no longer just the guy on excursion but rather someone who might be something around here. Granted that isn’t going to have the longest future, but for now I can settle for a young, talented star giving Moose a nice match.

Nick Aldis is happy to be back and tells us some of his history around here. He’s coming for Steve Maclin and the World Title because he knows what it’s like to be under that pressure. As soon as Maclin’s strong legs start to wobble, Aldis will be right there to take the title from him. As usual, Aldis cuts a good promo, but he’s only so interesting.

Frankie Kazarian vs. Good Hands

Kazarian slugs away to start but gets caught in the wrong corner rather quickly. A dropkick puts both Hands down at once but Skyler low bridges Kazarian to the floor. Back in and Kazarian takes over without much trouble, setting up a Figure Four and small package for two at the same time. The slingshot cutter hits Hotch and the chickenwing finishes Skyler at 3:40.

Rating: C. Just a showcase for Kazarian here, which wasn’t the most thrilling stuff but it wasn’t supposed to be. Kazarian getting a push is a fine way to go as he would be a good choice for a one off World Title shot at Maclin. You aren’t likely to get anything worse than pretty good out of him so warming him up like this could be a rather smart move.

The Coven is coming for Deonna Purrazzo.

Sami Callihan talks about how smart he is and claims to have infiltrated the Design to take them down from within. Was that really supposed to be a surprise?

Digital Media Title: Joe Hendry vs. Sheldon Jean

Hendry is defending and brings up Jean being on Big Brother Canada but having his season cut off by the Coronavirus pandemic. Jean shrugs off an early beatdown and hammers Hendry down on the mat for a bit of a surprise. That’s enough for Hendry, who fights up with some clotheslines. The fall away slam sets up…actually a strike off until Jean gets dropped. The Standing Ovation retains the title at 4:33.

Rating: C. This was a little longer than I expected and Jean got in a nice bit of offense so it might have been a tryout for him. Hendry got to break the smallest bit of a sweat to retain, but the real perk here was the energy that he brings. The motivational stuff is great and I could see Hendry going pretty far around here, as the fans are into him and that’s what matters a lot of the time.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

It’s time for new World Champion Steve Maclin’s Changing Of The Guard ceremony. Maclin walks to the ring under military guard and talks about having to learn who he was when he came back. Now he’s the World Champion and issues the open challenge to any Canadian. Cue Scott D’Amore to say he’s not happy with Maclin being the champion but he earned it. Why did Maclin take so long to go after Josh Alexander during his record title reign?

Maclin laughs him off because he was hoping the old D’Amore would show up. D’Amore says Maclin hit him like a coward and the jacket comes off. If Maclin wants to face a Canadian at Under Siege, he can face the perfect Canadian: Perfect Creation One, PCO! Cue PCO to beat up the guards, with Maclin bailing. Some guards are put through a table to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I’m running out of ways to say it but Impact continues to be a completely watchable wrestling show every week. You can follow the stories really easily and it isn’t hard to jump into a lot of this stuff. They were at a new starting point with a lot of the stories this week, but there is enough to have more going on next week. Good show here, with a rather nice opener and a surprise first challenger for Maclin makes it even better.

Results
Time Machine b. Trey Miguel/Jonathan Gresham/Mike Bailey – Cradle Shock to Miguel
Alisha Edwards b. Tara Rysing – Facebuster
Moose b. Yuya Uemura – Spear
Frankie Kazarian b. Good Hands – Chickenwing to Skyler
Joe Hendry b. Sheldon Jean – Standing Ovation

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Rebellion 2023: They Did What They Could

Rebellion 2023
Date: April 16, 2023
Location: Rebel Sports Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

It’s back to regular pay per view around here and that should make for a good show. The injury bug has struck Impact hard though as a new World and Knockouts Champion have to be crowned tonight. Other than that we have a Hardcore War, because we just needed more Tommy Dreamer vs. Bully Ray. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Heath/Rhino vs. Champagne Singh/Shera

Singh offers Heath money to throw the match but Heath throws the money instead. Heath works on the arm to take over before it’s off to Rhino vs. Shera. Rhino gets taken into the corner and Shera hammers away, setting up some choking on the ropes. Rhino gets in a clothesline but Shera is back up to knock Heath into the barricade. The belly to belly gets Rhino out of trouble for good though as the tag brings Heath in to clean house. Everything breaks down and Singh rolls Heath up, with Shera holding the feet for the pin at 6:08.

Rating: C. Very basic match to open things up here and that’s all it needed to be. They kept things moving and while I’m not sure about the logic of having Shera and Singh win, well anything really, it wasn’t long enough to get bad and the fans are going to cheer for Rhino and Heath. Just don’t expect me to care about Singh and we’ll be fine.

Post match Rhino Gores Singh.

Pre-Show: Knockouts Tag Team Titles: The Coven vs. Death Dollz

The Dollz are challenging and it’s Rosemary and Wilde both tagging out to start. It’s way too early for the Sick Driver so Jessicka clotheslines her to the floor instead. Back in and King is sent into the corner for a running splash from Rosemary. King manages to get over for the tag to Wilde, who quickly takes over on Rosemary. A running shoulder in the corner connects and Wilde runs her over again for a bonus.

Rosemary slugs at Wilde, who gets caught with a Codebreaker to cut her right back off. An exploder to Wilde gets Rosemary out of trouble though and there’s the double tag so Jessicka can clean house. Everything breaks down and it’s quickly back to Rosemary, who gets to bite King. The spear gives Rosemary two but Wilde makes a blind tag. Rosemary hits a second spear for no count, as instead she walks into a swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker to give Wilde the pin to retain at 9:39.

Rating: C. Slightly longer match than the opener here but it didn’t make that much of a difference. The Knockouts Tag Team Titles are certainly better than either Women’s Tag Team Title in WWE but that isn’t the biggest hurdle to clear. The division needs some more teams, but the Coven still feels fresh enough to make them last for a while to come.

The opening video focuses on the World and Knockouts Titles being vacated and how we need new champions.

Tag Team Titles: Motor City Machine Guns vs. Bullet Club

The Club is defending in Ultimate X. It’s a brawl to start with Sabin getting knocked down but Shelley back off, allowing Sabin to try for the belts. With that not working, the Guns are sent outside for stereo dives from the Club. Back in and the Guns take over on, with Austin’s arm getting banged up.

Austin and Sabin climb up at the same time with the bad arm being rammed into the structure. Sabin ties up both of the Guns and Shelley goes up but gets pulled back down fast. Bey’s knee is banged up but he’s fine enough to grab a quick DDT and give everyone a much needed breather.

With everyone else on the floor, Austin busts out the big flip dive to take out both Guns. Back in and everyone gets knocked down again before all four go up for a climb at once. They all come crashing down and it’s the Art of Finesse to drop Shelley, allowing Bey to pull down the titles and retain at 13:07.

Rating: B. Hot opener as expected but there wasn’t much in the way of climbing, which made it kind of a regular match until the ending. The good thing is the people involved are able to do just about anything and make it work so this went well. I did like the lack of climbing and insanity though, as it was more about the people rather than the big crashes and spots. You don’t get that kind of thing in a match like this very often and it was nice for a change.

Commentary runs down the card as the audio quality goes down.

Steve Maclin is upset over the situation because he wanted to win the title from Josh Alexander. He spent years in a war zone and now he is ready to tag em and bag em. Oh and beat Kushida.

We recap Callihan trying to join the Design in maybe the dumbest story going in wrestling today.

Design/Callihan vs. Dirty Dango/Santino Marella/Joe Hendry

Before the match, Hendry mocks Callihan and the Design because the fans believe in him. He introduces Santino and….I still have no idea why this is supposed to be interesting. Is he really that kind of Canadian hero? Dango suplexes Angels to start and brings in Santino to wrestle Angels down. The threat of the Cobra sends Angels into the corner for the tag off to Callihan.

Santino gets taken into the corner corner so the beating can begin. A quick escape allows the tag off to Hendry though and Kon is pulled out of the air. Deaner gets suplexed and the tag brings Dango in to take over on Callihan. The Dirtbag Shuffle hits Callihan but a Kon distraction lets the villains get in a cheap shot. Dango gets beaten down in the corner but he manages to knock Angels down, allowing the hot tag off to Santino.

Everything breaks down and Hendry hits a double fall away slam, only to get caught with the Cactus Special 97. Deaner’s discus lariat hits Santino but he wants Callihan to finish him off. Callihan is handed the baseball bat….and he hits Deaner with it (thank goodness). Callihan gives him the thumbs down and walks out, leaving Santino to hit the Cobra for the pin on Deaner at 10:40.

Rating: C+. Pretty basic six man with the focus being on Santino and Callihan. That isn’t the most thrilling match but the fans being into it helped things a lot. At the very least, we’re done with the idiotic Seven Deadly Whatevers for Callihan, meaning we can finally move on to ANYTHING else. Not a great match but the fans liked it enough so it could have been a lot worse.

Tommy Dreamer is sad about his mother’s health but wants to be here anyway to fight in her honor. Dreamer is leaving a bit after tonight, but he’s ready to fight with the people he loves.

We recap PCO vs. Eddie Edwards. Eddie turned on PCO during the Honor No More days, sending PCO into a quest for revenge. For some reason Eddie has tried to bury PCO multiple times, which has been as bad of an idea as it has sounded. Now PCO wants to end Eddie for good in a Last Rites match.

Eddie Edwards vs. PCO

Last Rites (casket) match with Alisha Edwards in Eddie’s corner. PCO wastes no time in diving onto Edwards and the fight is on outside. Edwards gets in a shot though and hits his own dive to take over. They get inside for the first time, where PCO hits a running corner clothesline and a DDT.

The middle rope legdrop hits Edwards again and the Deanimator makes it worse. Back in and a chokeshove sends Edwards right back to the floor but it’s too early for the casket. Edwards gets in a shot to the arm and yep that’s dislocated. A German suplex and superkick don’t make things better for PCO so he goes outside…and slams the shoulder into the post to pop it back in.

They chop it out (with PCO opening his vest to make it easier) and Edwards is in trouble again. The PCOsault connects and Edwards gets chokeslammed onto the apron for another painful crash. Edwards gets in a shot of his own and smashes a kendo stick over PCO’s head. The Boston Knee Party connects but PCO pops back up. Cue Alisha with a shovel to the back for no avail, leaving PCO to chokeslam Eddie into the casket for the win at 13:46.

Rating: B-. PCO is not an overly complicated idea and sometimes that is what you need. In his case, you have a monster who is going to hurt people and is nearly unstoppable, which is exactly what you had here. I’m not sure what is next for PCO, but Edwards needs to go away for the time being while PCO moves off to something else. Good brawl here though, with PCO’s monster offense being great.

Trey Miguel’s promo….cannot be heard as there is no sound.

We recap Trey Miguel defending the X-Division Title against Mike Bailey and Jonathan Gresham. In short, two challengers, stupid champion, interference, triple threat results.

X-Division Title: Jonathan Gresham vs. Mike Bailey vs. Trey Miguel

Miguel is defending in an elimination match. They go with some three way grappling to start and that’s good for a three way standoff. Gresham and Bailey double hiptoss Miguel for a double two before Miguel is smart enough to bail to the ramp. The other two get to fight a bit until Miguel comes back in with an enziguri to Gresham.

Bailey is back up with a missile dropkick to Gresham and the standing shooting star gets two on Miguel. Bailey Indian Deathlocks Gresham and suplexes Miguel at the same time to crank on the leg even harder. Miguel gets dropped again and the challengers get to slug it out. Bailey poisonranas Gresham and crashes outside with Miguel in a big heap. Gresham dives onto Miguel but Bailey dives onto both of them to take over again.

Miguel cutters Bailey down and hits a big running version over the top for two on Gresham inside. Gresham is fine enough to Figure Four Bailey (that won’t work) but Miguel breaks it up with a top rope Meteora to eliminate Gresham at 9:45. Miguel figures Bailey’s four and they chop it out with the hold still on.

Bailey finally breaks out and wins a chop off until he kicks Miguel in the face. A standing flipping slam gives Bailey two and there’s the tornado kick. The Ultimate Weapon misses so Bailey sends him outside for the standing moonsault knees. Back in and the Ultimate Weapon only hits mat, allowing Miguel to roll him up with trunks to retain at 13:53.

Rating: B. Good, fast paced match here which shouldn’t be a surprise, much like holding Bailey in a pair of Figure Fours for two minutes straight making him do more flips and kicks. That is just something you know is coming from Bailey but at least now we get to move on to more of Miguel as champion. His time as champion is getting to be impressive as he is getting into the all time ranks and that can make for some very fun times.

We recap Team Bully vs. Team Dreamer. This is all about Bully Ray vs. Tommy Dreamer, which has been going on for about six months now. Ray pretended to be good, Dreamer wasn’t sure, Ray revealed he was evil, it’s time for a big fight with friends because they used to be around each other in ECW.

Team Bully vs. Team Dreamer

Bully Ray, Moose, Brian Myers, Masha Slamovich, Kenny King
Tommy Dreamer, Killer Kelly, Yuya Uemura, Frankie Kazarian, Bhupinder Gujjar

It’s basically WarGames without the cage, with the first two entrants in for three minutes. Then Team Bully (thanks to winning a match on Impact) gets an advantage for ninety seconds. All ten have to get in and then it’s first pin or submission, anything goes. Moose starts for Team Bully and Frankie Kazarian starts for Team Dreamer.

Kazarian starts fast by throwing a trashcan at Moose’s head and we’re ready to go. Moose fires back with a chop and they head outside, where Kazarian sets up a table. We’ll save that for later though as they head back inside, with Kazarian sending him into the corner. Brian Myers is in to give Ray the advantage and he sets up another table next to the first.

Bhupinder Gujjar evens things up and goes after Myers to give Kazarian a breather. The cheese grater to the head has Myers busted open (good thing he is in a white shirt) and Moose gets trashcan lidded down. Kenny King is in to uneven things again and house is quickly cleaned. Moose hits Gujjar in the head with a bottle of water and Killer Kelly makes it 3-3. That means a staple gun to Myers’ head and another shot between Moose’s legs. Then Kelly staples her own head and it’s Masha Slamovich in to give the villains control again.

Everyone else is knocked down and it’s Myers alone to face Yuya Uemura as things are evened up. The good guys clear the ring again and it’s Bully Ray to complete his own team. Ray is smart enough to take his time so the rest of his team can get back up and jump Team Dreamer. Kelly is held down but it’s Dreamer to even things up with the kendo stick. Dreamer goes after the leg….and everyone else gets involved for a ten person chain submission for quite the visual.

Kelly and Slamovich have a chair duel until Ray shoves Kelly off the top. Moose spears Ray by mistake and Uemura hits Moose with a high crossbody. The Killer Klutch has King in trouble but Slamovich breaks it up and Snow Plows Kelly. Dreamer piledrives Slamovich but here are the Good Hands to jump him.

Kazarian breaks that up and let’s bring in a ladder. The Good Hands come back in to go after Kelly, who beats them up like the goons they are. Kazarian cutters Skyler through the tables at ringside but Ray low blows Dreamer inside. Another table is set up….and here are a bunch of referees to beat Ray up for revenge from the last few weeks. Dreamer drops Ray and, with the referees holding the ladder, goes up to splash Ray through said table for the win at 25:07.

Rating: C. What is there to say here? You have a bunch of other people there to keep everyone else warm for the sake of Ray vs. Dreamer. This is a feud that has been going on for months for reasons I still don’t quite get, but hopefully this should wrap it up. The hardcore stuff was kind of there but it was all basic stuff with only a few spots of note. It was fine enough and far better than Ray vs. Dreamer on their own, but it has been a story that wasn’t interesting for months and wasn’t much better here in the blowoff.

We recap the World title match. Josh Alexander had to vacate the title after about a year long reign, setting up #1 contender Steve Maclin vs. Kushida, the best remaining option. There isn’t much heat on the match, but it is a case where they didn’t have another choice and are doing the best they can.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Kushida vs. Steve Maclin

For the vacant title and former World Champion Nick Aldis is here as a surprise guest commentator. Aldis says he is officially back in Impact, which is better than nothing for him. Kushida goes right at him to start fast but it’s way too early for the Hoverboard Lock. Back up and Kushida rides him into a headlock without much trouble as Maclin can’t get anything going here.

Kushida can’t hit the basement dropkick so he takes it over into a wristlock instead. The Hoverboard Lock is blocked again and this time Maclin sends him throat first into the top rope to take over. A backbreaker gives Maclin two and Kushida’s back is sent into the post. They head outside with Maclin grabbing a suplex and dropping an elbow off the apron, though he might have banged up his knee in the process.

We hit the chinlock with a knee in Kushida’s back as Maclin certainly has a target. An Angle Slam is blocked though and Kushida hits a running kick to the arm. A discus forearm sets up the small package driver to give Kushida two but Maclin is fine enough to crotch him on top. They go to the ramp where Kushida hits a running shot to the arm but said arm is fine enough for a German suplex back inside.

A buckle bomb into a sitout powerbomb gives Maclin two and he puts Kushida on top. That is hardly the best idea as Kushida pulls him down into a cross armbreaker. Maclin gets over to the rope for the break and they crash out to the floor again. Back in and Maclin’s spear in the corner sets up the KIA for two, leaving Maclin frustrated.

Maclin goes up top but dives into the Hoverboard Lock, only to break it up with some forearms to the head. Another Hoverboard Lock goes on but Maclin reverses into a Death Valley Driver into the corner. Kushida gets the Hoverboard Lock AGAIN, only to have Maclin reverse into another KIA for the pin and the title at 18:27.

Rating: B. That was about the only way they could go as Kushida was a filler opponent for Maclin. That isn’t something they could really get around given the circumstances and it wound up being a rather good match anyway. Maclin has been built up to be champion for months now and it was the only conclusion they had here. Kushida going for the arm time after time but having Maclin escape it at every turn worked well. They were limited in what they could do and made it work as well as possible.

Post match Maclin insists that Scott D’Amore come out and hand him the title. D’Amore does so and gets hit in the face with the belt. Nick Aldis gets in and glares Maclin off. Aldis works just fine for a first challenger, as Maclin has already run through a lot of the other options.

Here are some upcoming major events. Multiverse United 2 is on August 20.

We recap the Knockouts Title match. Again the champion, Mickie James in this case, was forced to vacate the title due to injury so we have the #1 contender and a former champion fighting for the title.

Knockouts Title: Deonna Purrazzo vs. Jordynne Grace

For the vacant title. They shake hands to start and Grace grinds away on a headlock. Purrazzo cranks away on the arm and has Grace in some early pain. Some armdrags into a running hurricanrana has Grace in more trouble but she sends Purrazzo outside. That means a dropkick through the ropes and a Jackhammer on the floor as Purrazzo is rocked.

A rather stalled suplex gives Grace a slightly delayed two but she has to roll out of a Fujiwara armbar. The Queen’s Gambit on the ramp is broken up so Purrazzo settles for a moonsault to the floor instead. Back in and the Queen’s Gambit is broken up again but Purrazzo is able to grab a Koji Clutch.

Grace powers out and drops her hard with a Vertebreaker for all things for two. The Grace Driver is blocked and she pulls Purrazzo into a rear naked choke. They trade some strikes but Purrazzo pulls her into the Fujiwara armbar. Make that the Venus De Milo but a foot on the rope is good for the break. Back up and Grace’s spinebuster gets two, followed by a Grace Driver for the same (as Rehwoldt is getting into these near falls). Purrazzo counters a superplex into a sunset bomb, setting up the Queen’s Gambit for the pin and the title at 17:06.

Rating: B. This is an interesting way to go as I would have expected Grace to win but Purrazzo is a completely acceptable choice as well. Grace had held the title for a long time until James took it off of her but it has been a bit since Purrazzo. They could go quite an interesting direction with Purrazzo fighting off some challengers and hurting some arms, so this was certainly a smart idea. It was a good match as well, similar to Kushida vs. Maclin actually, but with the submission holds having more success until Purrazzo managed to pull it off.

They hug to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. They were in a rough place here as the two biggest matches had stories thrown together over the last two weeks. That left the main story of Bully Ray vs. Tommy Dreamer with four friends each. Given what they had, they had put on a rather strong show, which has been the case for their bigger events in recent memory. Good show here, and worth some extra praise all things considered.

Results
Champagne Singh/Shera b. Heath/Rhino – Rollup to Heath
The Coven b. Death Dollz – Swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker to Rosemary
Bullet Club b. Motor City Machine Guns – Bey pulled down the titles
Santino Marella/Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry b. The Design/Callihan – Cobra to Deaner
PCO b. Eddie Edwards – Chokeslam into the casket
Trey Miguel b. Jonathan Gresham and Mike Bailey – Rollup with trunks to Bailey
Team Dreamer b. Team Bully – Splash through a table to Ray
Steve Maclin b. Kushida – KIA
Deonna Purrazzo b. Jordynne Grace – Queen’s Gambit

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – April 21, 2008 (2023 Redo, King Of The Ring 2008): Dang That’s A Lot

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 21, 2008
Location: BiLo Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s a special three hour show as the King Of The Ring is back. The tournament was announced last week and now we get the whole thing wrapped up in one night. Other than that, it is the go home show for Backlash and that means it is time for the final push towards the four way match for the Raw World Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

King Of The Ring First Round: Chris Jericho vs. MVP

Non-title. MVP slugs away to start but Jericho drapes him ribs first onto the top. Jericho takes it to the floor but MVP hits something like a hanging Nightmare On Helm Street back inside. Something close to a seated abdominal stretch has Jericho in trouble but he’s right back up and hits a running shoulder. A big boot gives MVP two, only to get taken down with a clothesline as the back and forth continues. The Playmaker is broken up though and Jericho gets the Walls for the clean tap.

Rating: C. It was intense while it lasted but they had no other way out besides having the US Champion tap out? Losing to Jericho isn’t some huge upset but MVP already has a title match on Sunday so why have him lose here? I’ve never gotten the thinking behind this, though it doesn’t do the loser’s title any favors.

King Of The Ring First Round: CM Punk vs. Matt Hardy

They trade forearms to start and Punk blocks the Side Effect with some elbows to the head. Punk knocks him down into a chinlock before putting him on top. What looked to be a superplex is broken up and a middle rope elbow to the back of the head rocks Punk for a change. Back up and Punk’s running knee and bulldog get two so Punk loads up the GTS. Hardy reverses into a sunset flip attempt but Punk sits down on it for the pin to advance.

Rating: C+. This was another fast and to the point match, though they kept things going so qquickly that it was entertaining. At the same time, the US Title match at Backlash has taken quite the hit in the first twenty five minutes of the show. This one isn’t as bad as the champ losing, but the title match doesn’t have quite the shine anymore.

Here’s what Barack Obama vs. Hilary Clinton looks like in Smackdown vs. Raw 2008.

We look back at JBL/HHH/Randy Orton attacking each other last week.

The Raw World Title match is now a four way elimination match.

JBL says tonight is about crowning the King Of The Ring but he will be crowned champion on Sunday. There is even an article about him on the front page of the New York Times!

King Of The Ring First Round: Finlay vs. Great Khali

Hornswoggle is here with Finlay. Some shots to the knee manage to put Finlay down to start but Khali chokes him from the mat. A big boot drops Finlay so Hornswoggle tries to bring in the shillelagh. With that broken up, Khali wraps Finlay’s leg around the post and that’s a fast DQ.

Post match here is Big Show for the showdown with Khali. That’s enough to send Khali bailing to wait for Sunday. With Finlay being helped to the back, here is William Regal for the final first round match.

King Of The Ring First Round: Hornswoggle vs. William Regal

Regal Stretch finishes Hornswoggle in about 20 seconds.

Video on the European tour.

Here is Shawn Michaels for a chat. Shawn didn’t think he would be out here dealing with one of Ric Flair’s best friends in Batista. He needs to ask Batista something here though, so come on down. Cue Batista, with Shawn bringing up what Chris Jericho said on Smackdown: did Batista want to be the one to retire Flair? Batista asks if it would be easier if the answer was yes. Either way, Batista is ending this at Backlash, but Shawn promises to show Batista why he is the Heartbreak Kid. Shawn is willing to do anything to win, so be ready. Violence is teased but they leave.

In light of the Pennsylvania Presidential Primary, Hilary Clinton joins us and says the election is starting to sound like King of the Ring. This time though, the Last Woman Standing may be a woman. Whoever wins will have a lot of challenges to overcome but she will stay in the political arena and won’t come after Randy Orton. She might drop the People’s Elbow though. This was as eye roll inducing as you could have imagined but points for actually showing up.

Hardcore Holly vs. Carlito

Cody Rhodes and Santino Marella are here too. Holly starts fast and hammers him into the corner. An atomic drop hits Carlito but he knees Holly in the ribs and takes over. We hit the chinlock with a knee in the back before an elbow to the face cuts off Holly’s comeback. The Alabama Slam is countered into the Backstabber to give Carlito the pin.

Rating: C-. This was as interesting as a Carlito vs. Hardcore Holly match to set up Carlito/Santino Marella vs. Holly/Cody Rhodes Tag Team Title match was going to be. This feud is pretty horrible, but it isn’t like the titles have felt important in a good while. Just find some better teams. It really shouldn’t be that hard.

Post match Santino promises to win the Tag Team Titles but Cody clears the ring.

HHH promises to win the title at Backlash.

King Of The Ring Semifinals: CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho

Non-title. Jericho grabs a headlock takeover and gets absolutely nowhere. Back up and Punk starts kicking away at the leg but gets dropped ribs first across the top rope. Jericho stays on the ribs until a hammerlock lariat gives Punk two. They go to a pinfall reversal sequence and Punk’s snap powerslam gets two more. The Walls have Punk right back down, sending him over to the rope for the break. Jericho goes up but gets kicked in the head, setting up the GTS for the clean pin.

Rating: C+. It was fun while it lasted but they got out of there really fast. Maybe their time was cut short, but the Intercontinental Champion losing in about six and a half minutes completely clean is a strange thing to see. That being said, Punk is getting a push here and points for trying to make someone new.

Senator Barack Obama says it’s a chance to change business as usual and get rid of people trying to become King (of the ring). Do you smell what Barack is cooking? He certainly has charisma.

King Of The Ring Semifinals: William Regal vs. Finlay

This should be fun and Finlay is very banged up coming in. Finlay sends him outside but his band knee is sent into the steps. Back in and Regal goes after the knee like a true villain (or smart wrestler) should. Finlay forearms away and a backslide (which falls apart on the way down) gets two. Regal’s running knee knocks Finlay silly though and the Regal Stretch knocks Finlay out to send Regal to the finals.

Rating: C. Another short match here, which continues the issue of a one night tournament needing to be rushed, even if there is an extra hour. Regal and Finlay could have a heck of a fight if given the chance, but three and a half minutes with Finlay being banged up coming in isn’t going to allow that. Instead we got Regal being a villain who exploited an injury, which might just be a bit better.

Senator John McCain uses a bunch of wrestling catchphrases and promises to introduce Osama Bin Laden to the Undertaker and tells us to vote. All three of these were pretty bad, but they did take the time to appear.

Backlash rundown.

John Cena is tired of talking and wants to fight. He talks about how he knows he has a chance on Sunday and the other three have to go through him.

WWE has helped with a literacy program. Nothing wrong with that.

Barack Obama vs. Hilary Clinton

Let’s get this over with as I’m sure Vince McMahon finds this hilarious. Clinton comes out to Real American and has a Bill Clinton impersonator. Before the match, Hilary cuts a promo for the Hilamaniacs and there is an eerie silence as she stops to bicker with Bill. Fans: “MONICA! MONICA!”

Obama, with big fake ears, comes out to Rock’s theme. His Rock impression isn’t well received but Bill cuts him off. Hilary jumps him to start and gets two off a slam into a legdrop. The Rock Bottom connects (Bill: “Honey are you go???) but Bill breaks up the People’s Elbow (Bill: “I did not have inappropriate conduct.”). Umaga finally comes in and the match is thrown out.

Umaga wrecks both of them, ending one of the dumbest segments that probably had a certain someone howling backstage.

Here are a bunch of the more popular Divas for a chat. Last week, Mickie James won the Women’s Title from Beth Phoenix, which they never thought possible. Mickie is brought out for a chat, plus a lot of hugging. Cue the evil Divas, with Beth Phoenix promising to get the title back. McCool slaps Beth and the big brawl is on.

Mr. Kennedy is back next week. He was gone?

King Of The Ring: William Regal vs. CM Punk

Regal takes him into the corner to start and hammers away but Punk sends him into the buckle. A belly to back suplex drops Punk for two and Regal cranks on both arms. Punk finally slips out and kicks him in the head. It’s too early for the GTS though as Regal grabs the rope and knees him in the head. The Regal Stretch makes Punk tap and Regal is King.

B: C. So that’s the tournament, with the longest match not even breaking seven minutes. This was another match that just came and went because there wasn’t time to do much. Punk’s ribs were tied throughout the matches he wasn’t even in the ring for fifteen minutes throughout the night. I like Regal winning though, as he is great when given a chance to showcase everything he can do. Just do better with the tournament next time, or stretch it out to a second week.

Post match Regal sits on the throne and we’re off to a break rather quickly.

Here is Randy Orton for the main event, but first he says he is tired of everyone talking about taking his title. He has nothing to say except for listing off the shows where he retained.

Randy Orton/John Bradshaw Layfield/Chavo Guerrero/Edge vs. HHH/Kane/Undertaker/John Cena

That’s a pretty outstanding group of good guys. Edge tries to jump Undertaker to start and gets caught with a quick Old School. We take a break and come back with Edge charging into HHH’s spinebuster, allowing the diving tag to Cena. The Shuffle is broken up thanks to a Chavo low bridge though and it’s Orton coming in to kick him in the ribs.

JBL gets two off a neckbreaker as the villains start taking turns on Cena. Orton grabs the chinlock with a bodyscissors until Cena powers up for a ram into the corner. The tag brings in Kane and everything breaks down. Kane chokeslams Chavo but Edge comes in off a blind tag and hits a spear for the pin.

Rating: C+. This felt like a house show match where you get your big names in the ring to end the show. It worked for what it was, in that it previewed multiple pay per view title matches at once, though there was no reason to believe it was going to be anything great. Kane taking the fall when Chavo is there is a bit weird, but maybe they feel they have beaten him into the ground enough.

Post match we hit the parade of finishers, with Undertaker chokeslamming Orton and JBL to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a strange show in that they tried to pack in a lot and it was too overcrowded. Between the tournament, the political stuff and the build towards the pay per view, this felt like it needed to be about four hours, or two regular weeks, to make it work. What we got did work and they covered a lot, but it felt like it could have been that much better rather than just doing ok with everything. Cut some of this stuff out and let the show breathe a bit more and it’s that much better. Or just get rid of the Obama vs. Hilary match because that was an audience of one deal if I’ve ever seen one.

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – April 13, 2023: Worth Filing Out For

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 13, 2023
Location: St. Clair College, Windsor, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

The road to Rebellion end this week and that means it is time to finish off the build towards the show. In this case it means we are going to be seeing more build towards the new World Title match of Kushida vs. Steve Maclin. This week will also see what happens with Mickie James and the Knockouts Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Kenny King vs. Frankie Kazarian

The winner gets the advantage in the Hardcore War at Rebellion and the other teams are at ringside. They fight over a lockup to start until Kazarian snaps off some chops. King cuts him off though and starts hammering away in the corner to take over. A backbreaker gives King two and we hit the one armed camel clutch. Kazarian breaks it up and makes the clothesline comeback, capped off by a running forearm.

The springboard spinning legdrop gives Kazarian two but King is back with a tiger driver for the same. King sends him to the floor but Kazarian comes back in with a slingshot cutter for two. The brawl on the floor finally breaks out as Kazarian gets the chickenwing. Cue Brian Myers for a distraction, allowing Moose to spear Kazarian down for the pin at 8:18.

Rating: B-. These two were having a good match until the screwy ending, which was quite the twist as Myers and Moose haven’t had anything to do with this feud so far. They would be an upgrade over the Good Hands for the match but that might be asking too much. For now though, I’ll settle for talented wrestlers having a good match to open the show, as is the norm around here.

Post match the beatdown is on and Team Dreamer is left laying.

Earlier tonight, Steve Maclin interrupted the Canadian National Anthem. Kushida made the save and cleaned house in a brawl.

Lince Dorado vs. Black Taurus vs. Laredo Kid vs. Rich Swann

Crazzy Steve handles Taurus’ intro. Taurus sends everyone to the floor to start and hits the big dive, only to have a triple superkick send him to the floor. That means the dives can take him out and leave everyone down as we take a break. Back with Taurus launching Dorado onto the top, where he can superplex Kid (while on top of Taurus’ shoulders for a crazy visual).

Back up and Kid hits a springboard armdrag to Swann, followed by a double Golden Rewind from Dorado. Taurus is back in to clean house, including a heck of a pop up Samoan drop to Dorado. That’s not enough as Taurus powerbombs Kid onto Swann at ringside. Taurus cleans house and goes up, only to have Kid catch him with a super Spanish Fly for the pin at 10:44.

Rating: B-. This might not have broken the mold for a match like this but they did their thing well. Kid has felt like he should be the next breakout star in the division almost every time he is around but nothing has ever really clicked. It seems like they’re trying it again and pinning Taurus is certainly a good way to start. Taurus got to show off again here and that power is always worth a look. Fun match, as expected.

Long video on the Bullet Club vs. the Motor City Machine Guns in Ultimate X for the Tag Team Titles.

Jessicka and Rosemary want to go to the Undead Realm to get Taya Valkyrie back but Rosemary says she’s going alone because Jessicka doesn’t know how to do it. She opens the coffin….but it’s just a regular one instead of the portal. The Coven must be behind this!

Jessicka vs. Taylor Wilde

Rosemary and KiLynn King are here too. Hold on as Wilde gives Jessicka a tarot card to start so Jessicka shows it to Rosemary. That lets Wilde jump her from behind so Jessicka says STOP HITTING ME. Jessicka misses a charge and gets choked in the corner before a Backstabber brings Jessicka down again. Back up and some jabs stagger Wilde, setting up a running crossbody for two. Rosemary and King get into it, allowing Wilde to slip out of a Sick Driver and grab a fisherman’s neckbreaker for the pin at 4:28.

Rating: C. The more I see of Wilde, the more amazed I am by the fact that she is the same woman who came back to almost no reaction last year. This is a completely different way to go for her and it is working rather well. The Coven has been a nice breath of air for the division and I could go for them holding the titles that much longer.

Jordynne Grace is ready for the Knockouts Title match at Rebellion but she can’t control what happens with Mickie James. She can control winning though.

Alisha Edwards is glad to have brought Eddie Edwards back to the right path. Now they want to get rid of the monster blocking his path.

Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry vs. Angels/Callihan

Before the match, Hendry confirms our belief in him. The rest of the Design is here too because what would it be like without the rest of them. Callihan suplexes Hendry for a fast two so Angels comes in, only to get suplexed as well. Dango comes in for the Dirtbag Shuffle but Angels takes him down. Callihan is whipped into Angels though and it’s back to Dango to clean house. Kon grabs the leg though and it’s a standing Sliced Bread to drop Hendry. A frog splash gets two, with Hendry making the save. Callihan hits Angels by mistake so Deaner stops to yell, leaving Hendry to hit the Standing Ovation for the pin at 4:39.

Rating: C. Egads I don’t know how much more I can take of this story. It feels like it has been going on forever and the Design somehow gets lamer every single week. Just get to someone turning on someone so they can have their big violent match and we can move on. Dango continues to do fine in his role and it’s nice to see him getting away from the dancing stuff. Hendry continues to be awesome and that’s all he needs to be.

Post match the Design jumps them again, until Santino Marella comes out for the save. This includes the Cobra because….oh my head hurts again.

Video on Steve Maclin vs. Kushida.

PCO promises to bury Eddie Edwards in a Last Rites match at Rebellion.

Bully Ray introduces Moose and Brian Myers as new members of his now seven person army. They’re ready for Rebellion and promise destruction because they’re family. Keep in mind that this is all to destroy TOMMY DREAMER.

Gisele Shaw vs. Tasha Steelz

Jai Vidal and Savannah Evans are here with Shaw. Steelz scares her to the floor to start before Steelz slaps her in the face back inside. That sends Shaw back to the floor and we take a break. Back with Shaw slapping her in the face as the theme continues. Steelz chops away but Shawn knocks her outside, where Evans hits a chokeslam onto the apron.

A snap suplex gives Shaw two more and we hit the reverse chinlock. With that broken up, Shaw hits a double jumping stomp in the corner and we take another break. Back again with Shaw hitting a running jumping uppercut for two more, followed by a swinging suplex for the same.

Steelz fights up and hits an ax handle into an atomic drop into a…completely missed jumping neckbreaker. Shaw’s belly to back toss sets up a running shot to the back of the head for two. The annoyed Shaw stomps away in the corner before they head outside for a slugout. Steelz sends her into the steps but misses a running knee, which only hits said steps. Back in and Steelz kicks the knee out for the pin at 21:23.

Rating: C+. Something tells me we didn’t miss much between those breaks as I have a hard time believing that these two had a pay per view main event length match out of nowhere. It wouldn’t surprise me if this had to be extended due to the Mickie James injury and if that is the case, they did rather well in an area they probably haven’t been in before.

Mickie James tells Santino Marella that the doctor has given her a diagnosis of her rib injury.

The fans leave the arena for Mickie’s announcement. I’m assuming this is to avoid the announcement getting out, but it comes off like some tragedy.

Rebellion rundown. Apparently Brian Myers and Moose are taking the Good Hands’ spots on Team Bully. At least they don’t have to find two more people for Team Dreamer.

Video on Mickie James’ Last Rodeo and path to winning the Knockouts Title again, plus Jordynne Grace and Deonna Purrazzo waiting for their shots.

Here is Mickie for her big announcement. When she started the Last Rodeo, she wanted to show that she still had it and that is what she did. At some point, every champion has to lose and she can handle some of that, but she can’t fight age. There is a difference between her and most of the division, but she feels like she is 20.

The fact that she isn’t makes this even worse and she thanks everyone for this Last Rodeo. She just got off the phone with the doctor though and she isn’t cleared to compete at Rebellion. She is a woman of her word and it is Deonna and Jordynne’s (watching in the back) time now. Mickie leaves the title, and her hat, in the ring and leaves. Grace leaves and Deonna looks on to end the show. This felt a lot like a retirement speech, but retiring over a broken bone feels like quite the stretch. James should be back and probably will, as ending a legendary career over something that will heal in a month or two is nuts.

Overall Rating: B-. The Mickie angle at the end was actually emotional and felt like a huge deal, which should set up the Knockouts Title match that much better. Other than that, the card for Rebellion was already mostly set coming into this show so there only so much that needed to be done. This show did well enough with the little that it had to cover, so nice job on hammering things down on the go home show.

Results
Kenny King b. Frankie Kazarian – Spear from Moose
Laredo Kid b. Black Taurus, Lince Dorado and Rich Swann – Super Spanish Fly to Taurus
Taylor Wilde b. Jessicka – Fisherman’s neckbreaker
Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry b. Callihan/Angels – Standing Ovation to Angels
Tasha Steelz b. Gisele Shaw – Kick to the knee

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – April 6, 2023: It’s The Best They Can Do

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 6, 2023
Location: St. Clair College, Windsor, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We’re done with Multiverse United and that means we are on the way to Rebellion. However, this time we are going to have to stop for the sake of Josh Alexander vacating the World Title due to injury. There is a new main event of Kushida vs. Steve Maclin for the vacant title at Rebellion, which should be good but won’t feel as special. Let’s get to it.

Here is Multiverse United if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Josh Alexander’s World Title reign and his injury, which may have been exacerbated by Kushida’s Hoverboard Lock in a recent match.

Motor City Machine Guns vs. TMDK

That would be Shane Haste/Bad Dude Tito for TMDK. Everything breaks down fast and the Guns send them to the floor, setting up the stereo dives. Back in and Skull & Bones is broken up, allowing Hates to take over on Shelley. Tito comes in to chop away for two and it’s right back to Haste for the neck crank.

A Downward Spiral into the corner gets Shelley out of trouble and Sabin comes in to clean house. Everything breaks down and the Guns take over, including a dive and a bunch of kicks. Back in and a toss Blue Thunder Bomb is broken up and it’s the Dream Sequence to Tito. A crucifix from Shelley into a rollup from Sabin finishes Haste at 7:46.

Rating: C+. These teams work well together, which shouldn’t be a surprise as the Guns can work with just about anyone. Haste and Tito have been around a little bit more frequently and what I’ve seen has worked. That being said, it’s a rather little bit so they have a ways to go before they really get anywhere.

Post match the Guns go to the back where they run into the Bullet Club, who can work their way up to another title shot. The Guns say they’ve already got a title match at Rebellion so let’s make it an Ultimate X match. If the Guns can make it happen, the Club is in.

Eddie Edwards makes sure Kenny King has his back against PCO tonight. King wants to know where Edwards was when he was fighting PCO, so no he doesn’t have Edwards’ back. He also makes it clear that he wasn’t the one driving the car that ran over PCO.

Tommy Dreamer comes up to see Scott D’Amore about being on his team at Rebellion. Dreamer sucks up to him but D’Amore says his job is back here.

Mike Bailey vs. Jonathan Gresham

The winner gets a shot at X-Division Champion Trey Miguel, on commentary, at Rebellion. They stare each other down to start and we get a handshake. They fight over a wristlock with neither getting very far. Instead Bailey backs him into the corner before a double collision puts them both down. We take a break and come back with Bailey missing a running shooting star press, setting up a pinfall reversal sequence. They go head to head and then chop it out until Gresham knocks him to the floor.

Back in and Gresham rolls him up for two but a flipping slam gives Bailey two more. Gresham grabs a not great looking Figure Four and they roll around until they fall under the bottom rope to break it up. After being in a Figure Four for over a minute, Bailey is fine enough to hit a top rope springboard moonsault to the floor. Bailey yells at Miguel, which is enough to draw him in for a springboard double dropkick for the double DQ at 13:09.

Rating: B-. Miguel came in just before Bailey could go insane with the no selling of the leg and that is fine enough. You can pencil in the triple threat for Rebellion from here and that isn’t the worst idea. Gresham and Bailey have had a rivalry going on and there is no reason to have one of them go over the other for a title shot. If nothing else, we continue the tradition of a champion not getting the problem of a double DQ in a #1 contenders match, so at least something is consistent.

Post match Miguel indicates he’s smart. I’m sure.

Deaner is impressed Callihan has made it this far and talks about Callihan doing well in step six. Then Callihan cost them a match against Time Machine, which Callihan finds ridiculous. It’s time for step seven, which involves getting rid of all other authority in Callihan’s life except for the Design. He can figure out how to do that. This remains one of the worst things in wrestling today.

Santino Marella makes the triple threat match for the X-Division Title at Rebellion. We’ll even make it elimination style.

Jody Threat vs. Tara Rising

The fact that Rising has hair ala mid 1990s HHH is just a coincidence I assure you. Threat grabs a headlock to start as we see Santino Marella down in the back. A running clothesline and uppercut stagger Rising before some standing clotheslines rock Rising again. Some more clotheslines set up the double knees to the back and a German suplex drops Rising again. An F5 (the F416, the local area code) finishes Rising at 3:08.

Rating: C-. This didn’t work very well as Threat wasn’t exactly impressive. She felt like almost anyone who would fit in with almost any low level indy promotion who needs a stereotypical intense woman. Maybe this was just a tryout or something but Threat didn’t really stand out in any good way here.

In the back, Scott D’Amore checks on Santino Marella, with Dirty Dango saying the Design did this. Dango thinks that since Marella is out of action (as he sits there wide awake), he should be in charge. Instead, D’Amore says that Dango and Joe Hendry should face the Design. Marella says this is a chance to show his son how to stand up for himself, so he’ll fight the Design at Rebellion. Because of course he will.

Gisele Shaw, Jai Vidal and Savannah Evans interrupt Tasha Steelz. Shaw isn’t happy with Steelz interrupting her and a match is set for next week.

Bully Ray/Good Hands vs. Tommy Dreamer/Yuya Uemura/Darren McCarty

McCarty is a former NHL player who got in a fight with Ray at Sacrifice. Skyler slugs away at Dreamer to start to no avail, so Uemura comes in for a double hiptoss. The jumping elbow drop gives Uemura two before it’s off to Hotch, who gets armbarred down. A cheap shot takes Dreamer down though and the double villain choking ensues. Dreamer finally DDTs his way out of trouble and it’s McCarty coming in to clean house. McCarty clears the ring before hitting a Stunner on Hotch for the pin at 5:47.

Rating: C. The match was nothing to see but rather a way to have McCarty in there for something a bit special. That’s all it needed to be and McCarty didn’t take up too much time. If nothing else, it meant we didn’t have to hear Dreamer and Ray talk again for a week so I’ll call that one a success.

Post match Kenny King runs in to go after Dreamer, drawing in Frankie Kazarian, Masha Slamovich and Killer Kelly in a row. Dreamer, Kelly, Uemura and Kazarian clear the ring as we seem to have a Team Dreamer for Rebellion.

Video on Josh Alexander’s World Title reign.

Jordynne Grace did well in a bodybuilding competition.

We look at Deonna Purrazzo qualifying for the Knockouts Title match at Rebellion.

Purrazzo talks about how rough of a time she has had in the last year but now she has a chance to get back to the top.

Eddie Edwards vs. PCO

PCO puts him on the top rope to start and snaps off a super hurricanrana as we take a break. Back with Edwards not being able to hit a tiger driver on the floor but settling for a superplex instead. A chop out goes to PCO and he choke shoves Edwards to the floor. The suicide cannonball plants Edwards again and a chokeslam onto the apron sends us to another break.

Back again with PCO hitting the Deanimator but Edwards pulls the referee in front of a charge. PCO goes up top but here is Alisha Edwards to beg him no on the PCOsault. Then she kendo sticks him in the head so Eddie can hit a buckle bomb. The Boston Knee Party finishes PCO at 16:45.

Rating: C+. PCO can still do some crazy things in the ring but at least the ending seems to explain who was driving the car. If nothing else, this ties up the on again/off again deal with Alisha and Eddie, which does at least offer something different for Eddie. You know there’s going to be some wacky match at Rebellion and that could at least be a lot of fun.

Post match PCO gives chase but Edwards and Edwards escape in their car.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Here is Scott D’Amore, with Kushida and Steve Maclin here as well, to accept Josh Alexander’s World Title. D’Amore talks about how great Alexander has been as champion and hypes up a new champion being crowned at Rebellion. Here’s Alexander, with his wife and son, to talk about opportunities. He toiled on the Canadian independent scene to get a chance and then D’Amore offered him a contract.

Alexander has worked so hard in and out of the ring to pay people like D’Amore back. His work ethic has brought him this far and he stands here the longest reigning World Champion in Impact’s history. At Rebellion, there will be a new champion crowned and we’ll find out if Maclin has what it takes. Alexander promises to get the title back and goes to hand it over….and then his son takes the title.

After a NEW CHAMP chant, the title is handed over to D’Amore but Maclin says just hand it to him because he was going to win it at Rebellion. D’Amore goes off on Maclin for going after an injured Alexander, because if Maclin was a real man, he would have accepted the open challenge like Mike Bailey did. Maclin isn’t a real man and a few weeks ago, Kushida made him tap out. Maclin calls out Kushida, who pulls him into the Hoverboard Lock and sends him running before holding up the title. Kushida hands the title back to D’Amore to end the show. They did what they could with what they had here so this could have been worse.

Overall Rating: C+. This was another standard Impact show with enough good action and building towards the future. The Alexander segment was doing as well as could be expected given some horrible circumstances that aren’t Impact’s fault so I’ll take what I can get. Other than that, they’re getting Rebellion ready and we might even be seeing less from Santino Marella week to week. I’ll call that a win so it’s another nice week around here.

Results
Motor City Machine Guns b. TMDK – Rollup to Haste
Mike Bailey vs. Jonathan Gresham went to a double DQ when Trey Miguel interfered
Jody Threat b. Tara Rising – F416
Darren McCarty/Tommy Dreamer/Yuya Uemura b. Bully Ray/Good Hands – Stunner to Hotch
Eddie Edwards b. PCO – Boston Knee Party

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – March 30, 2023: Never Before Seen Sideshow

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 30, 2023
Location: Globe Theater, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

This is a special show as it is really a big pre-show for the Multiverse United show taking place later tonight. Since that isn’t enough to carry two hours, there are also a few bonus matches from previous TV tapings. Impact has been rather entertaining lately but sometimes you need to shake things up a bit. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We run down the Multiverse United card, which is pretty stacked.

Santino Marella comes in to talk about the card, because when you think dream matches with Impact vs. New Japan, you want that accent and jokes about how he can’t get his words right.

Video on Mike Bailey vs. Hiroshi Tanahashi, with Tanahashi being Tanahashi and Bailey wanting to face one of the best ever.

Let’s look at one of those two in action. From new Japan Resurgence 2021.

IWGP US Heavyweight Title: Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Lance Archer

Archer is defending and sends Tanahashi outside to start. It works so well that he does it again and we’re clipped to Tanahashi getting clotheslined to the floor as Jon Moxley (with a beer in a nasty flashback) is watching at ringside. Archer hits a running flip dive off the apron and Tanahashi is whipped into the barricade.

Back in and three straight running shoulders crush Tanahashi in the corner but Archer stops to yell at Moxley. We’re clipped again to Archer scaring the referee and getting in a low blow but Tanahashi fights out of the chokeslam. A backsplash sets up a middle rope flipping backsplash but Archer kicks him in the face as we take a break.

Back with Tanahashi slipping out of a Black Out (having apparently already taken one). Tanahashi fights back and hits Twist and Shout, followed by a Sling Blade for two as we hit fifteen minutes in (about 12 show, including a commercial). Archer fights back and loads a chair in the corner but of course gets sent into it instead. A Black Hole Slam gives Archer two and we’re clipped to the two of them on top. Tanahashi knocks him down and hits back to back High Fly Flows for the pin and the title at 15:44 shown (of 19:26 and again, minus about 3:30 due to commercial).

Rating: B. Tanahashi might not be what he used to be but even a banged up and old Tanahashi is still better than just about anyone in the world. He knows exactly how to wrestle a monster like Archer and it is nearly impossible to not enjoy something about him. Very engaging match here as I wanted to see Tanahashi make the comeback. I’m sure the longer version is even better, as it tends to be.

Rocky Romero loves seeing the promotions working together and is ready to win another title tonight.

We take a quick look at Trey Miguel beating Lince Dorado at Sacrifice.

Video on Minoru Suzuki vs. Kenta vs. the New Japan Openweight Strong Title. For some reason, Suzuki, who earned the shot by pinning Kenta in the New Japan Cup, seems mad.

The hosts pick Kenta, but think both of them can be violent when they’re angry.

Fred Rosser replaces Santino and is ready for his eight man tag tonight.

We look at how Chris Bey and Ace Austin won the Tag Team Titles.

We also see the Motor City Machine Guns beating Bey and Austin at Against All Odds.

We look at the Motor City Machine Guns beating Austin and Bey at Overdrive.

We look at Aussie Open beating Austin and Bey on Impact. You might want to present your champs in a better light.

Austin and Bey did beat The Mighty Don’t Kneel at Sacrifice.

Rosser picks Austin and Bey to retain the titles.

We recap the mess left behind due to Mickie James suffering a broken rib. She isn’t going to vacate the title, but it comes down to her health status at Rebellion. If she is healthy, she’s in a title match but if not, it’s Jordynne Grace vs. the winner of tonight’s four way match.

James joins us and is sad about not getting to compete but we do have something to cheer her up: the Knockouts are the feature in this month’s Pro Wrestling Illustrated (somehow for the first time ever. She puts over the division and says she wanted to face Miyu Yamashita tonight, which sends us to another exclusive match.

From Windsor, Ontario, Canada.

Miyu Yamashita vs. Killer Kelly

Miyu powers her around to start before firing off the kicks. A big one to the chest drops Kelly, who looks somewhere between stunned and happy. One fan: “Kelly’s gonna kill you!” Miyu sweeps the leg again and gets two off a running kick to the chest. Kelly is back with some knees, only to get blasted with a clothesline for two. Some arm trap headbutts have Al Snow smiling somewhere and Kelly suplexes her into the corner.

It’s too early for the Killer Klutch though and Miyu hits a running kick to the face for a double knockdown. They slug it out from their knees and fight to the floor with Miyu getting the better of things. Miyu’s springboard something is broken up though and Kelly gets two off a fisherman’s suplex back inside. Kelly manages to pull her into the Killer Klutch but Miyu slips out and kicks her in the head (Skull Kick) for the pin at 10:14.

Rating: B-. Kelly continues to be someone who feels like she could be a big deal if she was given the chance. She has a unique look and feels creepy at times, which is a lot more than some can say. At the same time, Miyu came off like a more polished star (as she is) and that kick at the end looked great. Fun, hard hitting match here between two skilled women.

Here’s what’s coming on New Japan on AXS TV.

Tommy Dreamer joins us to talk about his issues with Bully Ray, setting up their team Hardcore War at rebellion.

We look at Bully Ray getting into a hockey fight with Darren McCarty at Sacrifice, resulting in Ray and the Good Hands putting him through a table. Then Scott D’Amore and company returned, with D’Amore giving Jason Hotch a Canadian Destroyer. Still probably not the best thing for a retired boss to do.

We preview Jeff Cobb vs. Moose in the Multiverse United hoss fight.

Dreamer picks Cobb because he hates Moose. That’s rather to the point.

Moose joins us from the arena to say that Tommy Dreamer is jealous about only accomplishing a fraction of what Moose has accomplished. As for Cobb, Moose knows he’ll bring it but Moose knows how to win. For some reason Moose sounded somewhere between sleepy and old here.

Post break Scott D’Amore joins us and invites D’Amore to join his team at Rebellion. D’Amore thankfully declines because he’s the President of the company. With Dreamer gone, D’Amore talks about Josh Alexander’s injury and is glad to have Lio Rush take Alexander’s place against Kushida tonight. We look at Kushida Hoverboard Locking Alexander at a recent show, with the hosts speculating that had something to do with Alexander’s injury (nice touch). Since Alexander is hurt, let’s take one more look at him defending the title.

From Las Vegas, Nevada.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Kenta vs. Josh Alexander

Alexander is defending and backs Kenta (with a bad shoulder) into the corner to start. A quick ankle lock sends Kenta bailing to the ropes and he’s able to send Alexander face first into the buckle to take over. We take a break and come back with Kenta kicking away and looking down at Alexander like a heel should. Alexander fights up and gets knocked to the floor, followed by a neckbreaker to give Kenta two back inside.

Another comeback is cut off with the tornado DDT across the top rope. A top rope clothesline gives Kenta two and he knocks Alexander to the apron. Back in and Alexander managers to power him into the corner as we take another break. We come back with Alexander taking him down for two and they slowly get up. An exchange of hard shots to the face put both of them down, followed by another slugout.

Kenta manages a hanging DDT and a running basement dropkick in the corner. A top rope double stomp gets two more and Kenta rips off the champ’s headgear. GTS is countered into the ankle lock but Kenta reverses into a rollup. A running knee gets two on Alexander but he blasts Alexander with a forearm. The C4 Spike retains the title at 21:50.

Rating: B. This was the long form match between two guys who can beat each other up. Kenta can be a heel rather well and he’s come a long way since the Hideo Itami days. At the same time, it’s sad to see Alexander still being able to go in the ring here because he wouldn’t be able to defend/lose the title because of his injury. Either way, good match here which would have been a lot of fun for the live crowd.

Scott D’Amore is sad about Alexander, who has to show up next week to vacate the title.

One more Multiverse United rundown ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a weird show as the wrestling worked well and it was nice to see something new, but the rest of the show was literally a big discussion about/commercial for Multiverse United. The bonus matches helped but you very easily could have skipped this one and not missed much. At least it was just a one off and we get the big show later tonight, so it’s hardly some horrible idea.

Results
Hiroshi Tanahashi b. Lance Archer – High Fly Flow
Miyu Yamashita b. Killer Kelly – Skull Kick
Josh Alexander b. Kenta – C4 Spike

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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