Superstars – October 28, 2016: The Kickoff Preview

Superstars
Date: October 28, 2016
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves

I can get through this. I can get through Darren Young vs. Jinder Mahal IV. Normally I wouldn’t believe they would actually go there but I said that after their first match and again after their second match. At least my therapy has been going well since then. Mahal was on Raw this week though so he’s at least in the building. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Neville vs. Titus O’Neil

This could be a disaster as Titus was one of the only people who could drag Neville down when they were in NXT. Neville wisely gets the crowd going by moonsaulting over Titus to start and kicking him in the face to actually do something to him. A good looking flip dive takes Titus down again but he kicks Neville in the face with a bit more force. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Titus tries to start a LET’S GO NEVILLE chant. Back up and Titus charges into raised boots in the corner and the Red Arrow finishes him at 4:30.

Rating: D. It takes a lot to mess up a power heel vs. a speed face but they managed to make it boring. I don’t know how someone with Titus’ look can be this bad but he pulls it off every single time. Above all else though, Neville is going to get a pop from the crowd no matter what because that Red Arrow just works every time.

We go back to Raw for the first time.

Here are Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman with something to say. Heyman does his usual schtick about how Lesnar will smash Goldberg, only to have the Goldberg chants cut him off. Heyman calls out the fan that started them and says they’re getting on Brock’s nerves. After their match, all of the chants in the world won’t be able to put Goldberg back together again.

Suplexes are promised and the fans go back and forth with SUPLEX CITY/GOLDBERG chants. Heyman rips on them and the chant turns into GOLDBERG SUCKS…..to wrap this up. Ok then. There was NOTHING here and it didn’t need Brock at all. Even Heyman looked rattled by the reaction.

Back to Raw again.

Mick Foley is in the ring for the contract signing between Sasha Banks and Charlotte. They talk about how big of a moment this is going to be, only to have Foley go into his annual rant about how evil the Cell is. Charlotte calls Sasha an entitled second rate talent who will learn respect from the Queen this Sunday. Sasha is ready to crawl up the ramp broken and bloodied as long as she has the Women’s Title. They trade insults but Foley cuts them both off to say he’s their future. Dude if the Cell is going to turn them into 6’4 men with long beards, maybe we should cancel the match.

As expected, the fans chant for Foley, thereby completely missing the point of this segment. Foley met Charlotte as a child and his kids gave Sasha their signed photo of Eddie Guerrero. More insults and a double signing FINALLY wrap this up. Charlotte vs. Sasha in a major gimmick match is fine but no one, like NO ONE, buys that the match is going to be all violent and career threatening like Foley is pushing and that kills the idea.

Sin Cara/Lince Dorado/Cedric Alexander vs. Tony Nese/Ariya Daivari/Drew Gulak

Cara and Nese start things off with the masked one starting in on Tony’s arm. A facebuster puts Cara down and it’s off to Gulak as the fans get a lot more quiet. Daivari of all people gets a reaction so Cara armdrags both Drew and Ariya at the same time. Dorado comes in and gets knocked off the apron and into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Lince still in trouble thanks to a chinlock and armbar. Gulak misses a charge though and it’s off to Alexander to really wake the crowd up. Everything breaks down with Cara knocking Nese and Gulak to the floor for a big dive. Back inside, the Lumbar Check knocks Daivari out for the pin at 8:09.

Rating: C. This was your run of the mill cruiserweight six man and it’s about as good as you’re going to get with no story or reason for them to be fighting. The match was fine enough and hopefully they can improve it when they do the same match again as the Kickoff match on Sunday.

We wrap the show up with Monday’s main event.

Seth Rollins vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens

Non-title. They play keep away to start until Owens gets kicked out to the floor. A Blockbuster gets two on Jericho but Owens pulls Seth outside. The champ is sent into the barricade but Jericho throws Seth into the crowd. Back in and Owens scores with a clothesline, only to have Rollins avoid the Cannonball. The Pedigree doesn’t work on either Canadian but the Lionsault hits Seth’s knees.

Owens saves his buddy from a Pedigree and it’s time for the double teaming. The handicap portion continues until Owens is low bridged to the floor. Jericho eats the low superkick and Rollins dives onto Kevin. Seth misses the frog splash and eats a Codebreaker for two. Owens comes back in and slaps Rollins a lot as the STUPID IDIOT chants kick in. Rollins escapes a double superplex and pins both guys at the same time with a double rollup at 10:00.

Rating: C+. The match was fun but it’s WAY too late in the night to really matter. Rollins pinning the champ is appropriate as Owens has been a huge afterthought in this entire story. That also makes four straight times that Rollins has pinned Jericho so you certainly can’t say he’s getting too many wins.

Post match Owens and Jericho destroy Rollins by sending him hard into the steps. We’re still not done though as Rollins runs up the ramp and dives at Owens, only to get beaten down again. Owens gives him the Apron Bomb and walks back up the ramp to get his title so some posing can end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Yeah this was fine. Aside from Rusev vs. Reigns, this was a solid preview for Sunday’s show. I would have gone with ANYTHING other than the Lesnar/Heyman promo though and I really don’t get why they decided to air that mess again. The exclusive wrestling was fine for a pair of glorified dark matches and that’s all Superstars is supposed to be.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Night Raw – October 24, 2016: Who Needs Sunday and a Cell?

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 24, 2016
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

The Beast is back tonight as Brock Lesnar is here for his first comments about his upcoming match with Goldberg. In addition to that we have two big matches including Sheamus and Cesaro vs. New Day in a non-title match and Chris Jericho vs. Seth Rollins vs. Kevin Owens in a triple threat. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Jericho to open things up with some terrible news: tonight’s triple threat match has been canceled until further notice. The fans aren’t happy with that one but Jericho says it’s because SOMEONE HAS STOLEN THE LIST OF JERICHO. Fans: “NO! NO! NO!” Jericho isn’t leaving until the List is returned but here’s Owens to interrupt. Owens doesn’t care who has the List but he’ll help Jericho find it once they get rid of Rollins.

Jericho says there’s no triple threat match tonight but here’s Stephanie McMahon to interrupt. She explains the idea of the triple threat (because Stephanie thinks all fans are idiots) and here’s Rollins with the List. Jericho freaks out and Stephanie goes all screechy to say give it back.

Seth sees Stephanie mentioned as a stupid idiot but at the very bottom is Jericho’s former best friend, Kevin Owens. Rollins wants to start a new list about Owens, who has no idea how it is inside the Cell. He’ll also kick Owens’ teeth down his throat and break his face with a Pedigree so he can teach HHH and Stephanie a lesson (because that’s what really matters in this whole thing).

This segment showed how horribly uninteresting this whole thing is when Jericho isn’t talking. Owens barely got to say anything and Rollins wants to win the title to show up HHH and Stephanie. Some main event feud. Also, did Stephanie need to be here? Like at all? She came out, told Jericho to do the main event (which Owens had already done) and was insulted that she was on the list (like Owens a few seconds later).

Post break Stephanie tells Rollins to give the List back because the fans were promised a triple threat. Rollins vents about Stephanie’s real intentions and says the List is in the locker room.

Enzo Amore vs. Karl Anderson

Anderson and Gallows have cut off Enzo’s mic so he and the crowd do it with pure vocal power. Enzo fires off rights and lefts in the corner but dives into a spinebuster as we take an early break. Back with Enzo getting kicked in the face but stopping a charge in the corner. A rollup is broken up but Cass kicks Karl in the face to give Enzo the pin at 7:39.

Rating: D+. I almost had this whole match written from the opening bell because this was exactly what you would have expected these two to do. It’s fine to set up the tag match and thank goodness we didn’t hear any of Anderson and Gallows trying to be funny. Enzo and Cass need to win on Sunday as it’s not like Anderson and Gallows can go much further into the hole.

Rusev says he slept like a baby last night because he gets his hands on Roman Reigns inside the Cell this Sunday. Reigns has done a lot of horrible things but now it’s Rusev’s chance to crush him for good. Simple and to the point here, as it should be.

New Day vs. Cesaro/Sheamus

Non-title. Before the match, New Day praises Cesaro but says Sheamus shames us because no one wants to see him. Woods is the odd man out here, which is kind of surprising as they’re normally defending the titles. Cesaro’s backbreaker gets two on Kofi and a double back elbows shows that Cesaro and Sheamus can actually work together. New Day quickly gets it together and takes Sheamus into the corner for the Unicorn Stampede.

Back from a break with Kofi in trouble and taking the ten forearms to the chest. Cesaro misses a charge into the post and the hot tag brings in Big E. to deal with Sheamus. The Irish Curse gets two on Big E. and Cesaro’s vertical suplex gets the same. The Midnight Hour is broken up but Kofi is launched straight into the uppercut. Sheamus Brogue Kicks Big E. for the pin at 11:45.

Rating: C+. Let’s see. Yeah I’m checking here. Maybe….almost….nah I still don’t care about Sheamus and Cesaro. They’re still the same uninteresting pair that have been around since before Summerslam and still are little more than a rehash of the League of Nations having problems against New Day back in the spring. New Day needs to roll over them and give us the record in December. If you just have to give these two the belts after that then so be it but don’t mess with the year plus run for this stupid idea.

We look back at Goldberg’s return.

Jericho frantically looks for the List but runs into Titus O’Neil, the Shining Stars and Jinder Mahal, all of whom have something for him other than the List (Titus Brand, travel brochures and a breathing exercise).

Bayley vs. Dana Brooke

Bayley has a taped up shoulder after last week. Dana says not so fast because she doesn’t like the idea of last week’s win being called an upset. Tonight there’s going to be another match but this time it’s arm wrestling. Dana easily wins so Bayley offers to go left handed. Bayley starts to win and of course Dana decks her and turns the table over for the beatdown. A Bayley to Belly sends Dana running and thankfully cuts off the BORING chants. Can you blame the fans for not being impressed here?

Jericho is freaking out over the List when he runs into Stephanie, who isn’t interested in helping him. Stephanie lists off everything she has going on and says Jericho is in the match, List or not. Chris says no List and no match, ya dig? That’s not cool with the boss, who says Jericho wrestles or gets suspended.

Curtis Axel vs. Bo Dallas

Before the match, Axel does a really good speech about his Minnesota roots and being Curt Hennig’s son. Bo starts fast but the Roll of the Dice is countered into a PerfectPlex for two. I bought that for a second. A running forearm drops Curtis and we hit the chinlock. Axel fights out and hits the running neck snap for two and that’s it for his offense as Dallas grabs a rollup for the pin at 2:58. I’ve said Axel should be pushed as a face for years and this was more evidence that I’m right. It’s also more evidence that WWE gets way too much pleasure out of having people lose in their hometown.

Video on Rich Swann.

Jericho is about to leave when a guy comes up to say he saw the List. Chris finds…..Braun Strowman looking at it and asks for it back. Braun: “Say please.” Strowman doesn’t see Sami Zayn’s name on the List but gives it back anyway. Jericho says it’s on page four and since Braun touched his personal property, HE JUST MADE THE LIST!

Roman Reigns talks about being in the Cell, which Rusev hasn’t experienced. Reigns takes this personally and is ready to do anything to keep the title on Sunday.

We run down the card for Sunday’s show.

Golden Truth vs. Shining Stars

Mark Henry is with Golden Truth and Titus is with the Stars, which makes me feel a bit better about their earlier segment. It’s really nice to have them actually have a reason to be in the back instead of just showing up for a cameo. I love little things like that. Corey is reading a brochure as the Stars come out to the ring as he needs to get his mom a birthday gift.

Primo is dropped by Goldust to start but some double teaming puts him down. The snap powerslam puts Epico down and everything breaks down with Titus low bridging Truth to the floor. Henry shoves Titus into the ropes to crotch Epico, setting up a flapjack into Little Jimmy for the pin at 4:02.

Rating: D. Can someone take this show behind the barn and shoot it already? I’ll actually give this match a little credit: they’re trying to build something out of nothing and it could be a lot worse. I mean, there’s at least something there and a moderate attempt to be interesting. It’s not really working and the match feels like a nacho break but I’ll take what I can get.

Mick Foley is in the ring for the contract signing between Sasha Banks and Charlotte. They talk about how big of a moment this is going to be, only to have Foley go into his annual rant about how evil the Cell is. Charlotte calls Sasha an entitled second rate talent who will learn respect from the Queen this Sunday. Sasha is ready to crawl up the ramp broken and bloodied as long as she has the Women’s Title. They trade insults but Foley cuts them both off to say he’s their future. Dude if the Cell is going to turn them into 6’4 men with long beards, maybe we should cancel the match.

As expected, the fans chant for Foley, thereby completely missing the point of this segment. Foley met Charlotte as a child and his kids gave Sasha their signed photo of Eddie Guerrero. More insults and a double signing FINALLY wrap this up. Charlotte vs. Sasha in a major gimmick match is fine but no one, like NO ONE, buys that the match is going to be all violent and career threatening like Foley is pushing and that kills the idea.

Emmalina video.

Brian Kendrick vs. Rich Swann

TJ Perkins is on commentary. As Kendrick makes his entrance, we see clips of his run from seven to ten years ago. It’s very sad that the #1 contender to a title doesn’t even have enough video from his current run for a highlight reel. In case you didn’t know, Perkins runs down his history with Kendrick (Brian was his mentor) for the millionth or so time.

Swann flips over Brian and hits a good looking dropkick. A spinning dive to the floor takes Kendrick down and we head to a break. Back with Swann fighting out of a chinlock and snapping off a top rope hurricanrana. What looks like a victory roll is broken up but Swann slips out of the Captain’s Hook and grabs a cradle for the pin at 9:14.

Rating: C. So Swann, who looked a lot better here, pins the #1 contender for a title that has no heat going into a pay per view title match. I get that Swann is likely the next challenger but they’re ruining this division more week by week. I’ll spare you another list of problems and just say Swann looked good here and go on.

Owens promises violence on Sunday but he’s the only one coming back.

Braun Strowman vs. Sami Zayn

This has the potential to be good so let’s see how they can screw it up. Before the bell, Strowman says he wants competition but he doesn’t see that in front of him. Strowman shoves him away but Sami low bridges him to the floor. This goes badly for Sami as he dives at Braun, only to get thrown into the barricade. Strowman walks away and there’s no match.

Kendrick comes in to see Perkins and says the clock is ticking on his career. If TJ loses on Sunday, he’ll bounce back. If Brian loses, that’s it for feeding his family. TJ walks away.

Here are Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman with something to say. Heyman does his usual schtick about how Lesnar will smash Goldberg, only to have the Goldberg chants cut him off. Heyman calls out the fan that started them and says they’re getting on Brock’s nerves. After their match, all of the chants in the world won’t be able to put Goldberg back together again. Suplexes are promised and the fans go back and forth with SUPLEX CITY/GOLDBERG chants. Heyman rips on them and the chant turns into GOLDBERG SUCKS…..to wrap this up. Ok then. There was NOTHING here and it didn’t need Brock at all.

Owens and Jericho have a meeting before the triple threat with Chris asking if their friendship means as much as the title. Kevin smiles it off and doesn’t really answer. Jericho says they’ll still be best friends no matter what but Kevin looks concerned.

Seth Rollins vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens

Non-title. They play keep away to start until Owens gets kicked out to the floor. A Blockbuster gets two on Jericho but Owens pulls Seth outside. The champ is sent into the barricade but Jericho throws Seth into the crowd. Back in and Owens scores with a clothesline, only to have Rollins avoid the Cannonball. The Pedigree doesn’t work on either Canadian but the Lionsault hits Seth’s knees.

Owens saves his buddy from a Pedigree and it’s time for the double teaming. The handicap portion continues until Owens is low bridged to the floor. Jericho eats the low superkick and Rollins dives onto Kevin. Seth misses the frog splash and eats a Codebreaker for two. Owens comes back in and slaps Rollins a lot as the STUPID IDIOT chants kick in. Rollins escapes a double superplex and pins both guys at the same time with a double rollup at 10:00.

Rating: C+. The match was fun but it’s WAY too late in the night to really matter. Rollins pinning the champ is appropriate as Owens has been a huge afterthought in this entire story. That also makes four straight times that Rollins has pinned Jericho so you certainly can’t say he’s getting too many wins.

Post match Owens and Jericho destroy Rollins by sending him hard into the steps. We’re still not done though as Rollins runs up the ramp and dives at Owens, only to get beaten down again. Owens gives him the Apron Bomb and walks back up the ramp to get his title so some posing can end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. What a dog of a show this was. There was no effort here and their best idea was to say “Raw Exclusive Pay Per View” over and over as many times as they could. This was every lame idea they could come up with in three hours with almost no one really trying and the show feeling even longer than usual. The worst part is the show wasn’t even the worst. What it was was lacking energy and that’s as bad as it’s going to get. Horrible stuff here and little more than making me want to get to Survivor Series instead of caring about Sunday.

Results

Enzo Amore b. Karl Anderson – Rollup

Cesaro and Sheamus b. New Day – Brogue Kick to Big E.

Bo Dallas b. Curtis Axel – Rollup

Golden Truth b. Shining Stars – Flapjack into Little Jimmy to Epico

Rich Swann b. Brian Kendrick – Oklahoma Roll

Seth Rollins b. Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho – Double rollup

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Superstars – October 7, 2016: The Long Version

Superstars
Date: October 14, 2016
Location: Oracle Arena, Oakland, California
Commentators: Corey Graves, Tom Phillips

It’s a big week around here as we’re coming off a pay per view and had a bunch of big matches announced for Survivor Series. In addition to that we also have the impending announcement of Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar II, which will probably also be at the November pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Shining Stars vs. Josh Andrews/Jared Pimm

Andrews seems interested in a time share to start but gets clotheslined instead. Well it’s more interesting than the time share would be. A double dropkick keeps Andrews in trouble and we get a LET’S GO JOBBERS chant. Epico gives him a delayed vertical suplex but a jawbreaker allows the tag off to Pimm. A double underhook gutbuster has Pimm reeling and an enziguri/legsweep combo puts him away at 3:46.

Rating: D. The Shining Stars just aren’t interesting and the crowd silence here tells you everything you need to know. There’s a reason these two have been around for years and barely ever done anything on the roster. Sometimes you have to accept that all the repackaging in the world isn’t going to save some acts.

We recap Raw’s opening segment between Rusev/Roman Reigns/Sasha Banks/Charlotte which set up the following mixed tag.

Charlotte/Rusev vs. Roman Reigns/Sasha Banks

The genders have to match so we start with multiple tags before any contact. Rusev punches Reigns to start and a clothesline gets two. Reigns starts a comeback as the fans want Sasha. The villains are knocked to the floor and we take a break. Back with Reigns caught in a chinlock and more WE WANT SASHA chants. A Superman Punch allows the tag to Charlotte, meaning it’s off to Sasha to clean house. Wouldn’t it have been smarter to not have Rusev tag so the advantage isn’t lost? The double knees in the corner get two on Charlotte and the Bank Statement makes her tap at 9:48.

Rating: D+. Well that happened and it was nowhere near as amazing as the announcers tried to make it seem. The fans really didn’t seem to care about Rusev vs. Reigns as there’s almost no way Rusev is getting the title back and everyone knows it. There was nothing to the match anyway and the sudden ending didn’t help things.

We see Goldberg’s comments on SportsCenter.

Here’s Paul Heyman to discuss said Goldberg comments but first we get another WWE2K17 video, this time of Lesnar vs. Goldberg. Heyman has heard people whispering about Goldberg returning for years now because they want one more spear and Jackhammer. You still hear the chants today and there they go again.

Everyone that got in the same ring as Goldberg was conquered while he was running parallel to Brock Lesnar. It keeps Heyman up at night that Goldberg is one up on Brock so as of tonight, Goldberg is officially challenged to a fight any place anytime. Goldberg can either live in the past or step in this ring and be conquered. In Suplex City, Goldberg is next.

Darren Young vs. Jinder Mahal

Yes again. Young takes him down with a headlock and chops in the corner a bit. For some reason Mahal heads outside to yell at Bob Backlund so Young takes him to the apron, only to get kicked into the post. Back with Darren in an abdominal stretch as the announcers talk about Mahal’s inner peace. Something about breathing techniques. Mahal slowly stomps on the ribs and puts on a chinlock with a knee in the back. Young fights up again and hits the belly to back suplex on the apron but Jinder kicks him in the head for two more. A dropkick gives Darren two more and the Gut Check ends Mahal at 11:02.

Rating: C-. I liked this better as it was a bit more competitive but Darren Young vs. Jinder Mahal is as stereotypical of a Superstars match as you’re going to get. Once the Election takes place and we can get rid of Make Darren Young Great Again, I can’t imagine either of these guys are going to be around much longer. Neither of them are interesting and neither of them have any depth to their characters.

From Raw, Stephanie McMahon and Mick Foley set up the night’s main event.

Here are the bosses with Stephanie making fun of Foley’s red flannel suit. In what sounds like a Home Shopping Network ad, Foley and Stephanie talk about the Women’s Title match being inside the Cell and confirm it for a second time tonight. But wait: there’s more. In a THIRD Cell match, Seth Rollins will be challenging for Kevin Owens’ Raw World Title as well.

This brings out Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens to say Mick has outdone himself this week. Owens doesn’t want to be in the Cell because he doesn’t want to be an old, broken down man like Foley. Jericho wants to know if he and Kevin can have their own private jet if Mick is just throwing out presents. The recklessness involved in putting Owens in the Cell means FOLEY JUST MADE THE LIST! Foley: “I started the List.” Jericho: “YOU JUST MADE THE LIST AGAIN!”

Stephanie tells Jericho to show Foley respect (MAKE UP YOUR FREAKING MIND ALREADY STEPHANIE!!! TWO WEEKS AGO YOU TREATED FOLEY LIKE A THREE YEAR OLD AND NOW JERICHO NEEDS TO RESPECT HIM???) so she has an idea: if Jericho can beat Rollins tonight, he’s in the title match as a triple threat. Because Raw needs to top Smackdown’s triple threat!

And now, that main event.

Seth Rollins vs. Chris Jericho

If Jericho wins, the Universal Title match becomes a triple threat. Rollins doesn’t care for having a toothpick thrown in his face so he smacks Jericho around. A Blockbuster gets two for Seth and Jericho bails to the floor, only to get caught by a slingshot dropkick. Cue Owens for a distraction so Jericho can take over and we take a break.

Back with Jericho kicking Rollins off the top and slapping on an abdominal stretch. Rollins sends him face first into the middle turnbuckle and gets two off a Sling Blade (which Jericho called loudly). Seth goes up top and slams Jericho off, only to have his crossbody dropkicked out of the air. The low superkick gets two on Jericho but Owens offers a distraction, allowing Jericho to grab the Walls.

A belt shot from Owens gets the same and Rollins takes him down with a suicide dive. The springboard knee to the head gets two on Jericho but he avoids the frog splash. A Lionsault gives Jericho a near fall of his own but he misses a high crossbody. Jericho reverses the Pedigree into another Walls attempt, only to get small packaged for the pin at 19:14.

Rating: B-. The ending was more of a relief than anything else as I really, really didn’t need to sit through another triple threat title match, especially inside the Cell. Rollins vs. Owens isn’t the most interesting thing in the world but Jericho can go and do something else instead of trying to salvage this upper midcard feud.

Post match Owens and Jericho beat on Seth but Rollins fights back and gives Jericho a Pedigree as Owens bails to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This wasn’t one of their better shows as the original wrestling really didn’t do anything for me. Mahal vs. Young was done last week and I really didn’t need to see the same thing in a version nearly three times as long. Couple that with a boring squash and this show pretty much just existed for the sake of the Raw recaps, where your mileage may vary.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Monday Night Raw – October 10, 2016: What’s The Story?

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 10, 2016
Location: Oracle Arena, Oakland, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We’re less than three weeks away from Hell in a Cell and only one of the namesake matches has been set up so far. The interesting question is what will be the second (if not the third): Seth Rollins vs. Kevin Owens or Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks. Both have been announced for the show but neither has officially been announced as taking place inside the Cell. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Sasha Banks to get things going. Sasha says she’s on top of the world right now and wishes Eddie Guerrero a happy birthday. She spent years watching Eddie lie, cheat and steal his way to the top. Last week she was in the main event of Raw, just like Trish Stratus and Lita were all those years ago. Sasha knows the rematch is coming at Hell in a Cell so let’s put it inside the Cell for the first time ever.

Cue Charlotte but Rusev (now with sideburns) and Lana of all people come out to interrupt. Rusev says no one cares about this women’s revolution but Charlotte takes the mic from him and, with Stephanie style tones, asks Rusev who he thinks he is. The match with Sasha is on inside the Cell.

Rusev takes the mic back and says good for you but he wasn’t done. This time it’s Sasha taking the mic away and throwing it to the mat. Lana says Sasha and Charlotte need to learn their place because they’re whining like little girls. That earns Lana a shove down and Rusev gets dropkicked out to the floor. Roman Reigns comes out to prevent the male on female violence. The match really doesn’t need to be inside the Cell from a storyline perspective but this is the next logical step for the women being treated as equals and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Here’s New Day to talk about the history of sports in Oakland, including the Splash Brothers and the Bash Brothers. That brings them to the most famous friends though: Danny Tanner and Uncle Jesse. See, there’s about to be a full house because New Day is three of a kind and they’re about to deal with a pair in Cesaro and Sheamus. Kofi has a hot garbage sign to describe Sheamus and Woods says the title match at the pay per view will prove that New Day rocks.

Cesaro vs. Kofi Kingston

Cesaro shoulders him down to start as we hear about Demolition’s record again. Apparently Sheamus is on Facebook while he’s sitting on the steps, not watching the match. They head outside for a staredown as we take a break. Back with Kofi getting two off a middle rope crossbody as Sheamus is still on Facebook. Trouble in Paradise misses and it’s time for the Uppercut Train. Kofi escapes a Sharpshooter attempt but tweaks his leg on a springboard attempt. Sheamus decides to go after Francesca and the distraction lets Kofi small package Cesaro for the pin at 7:45.

Rating: C. This was more about advancing the story than the match itself and that worries me. The announcers kept talking about how Cesaro and Sheamus have no chance to win the titles, making me think that’s exactly what’s going to happen. New Day has gone on WAY too long to let this thrown together team beat them for the belts two months before they break a nearly thirty year old record.

Tonight it’s Charlotte/Rusev vs. Reigns/Banks. Am I missing something or did Charlotte dropkick Rusev earlier tonight?

We see Goldberg’s comments on “Sportscenter”, where he said he’d love to face Brock Lesnar again.

Bayley vs. Cami Fields

Cami starts fast with some shoulders in the corner and stomps her way out of a sunset flip attempt. That’s about it though as the Bayley to Belly finishes Fields at 2:19.

Dana Brooke jumps Bayley post match.

Chris Jericho is on the phone with someone and says he wants a pay day. R-Truth comes up and offers him a Payday candy bar. I’ll take it if Jericho doesn’t want it.

Drew Gulak/Tony Nese vs. Sin Cara/Lince Dorado

You knew Cara would be involved in this sometime. Gulak and Dorado start things off but an early headscissors means it’s off to Nese. Dorado gets taken into the wrong corner as the fans are dying by the second. A Gory Special has Dorado in trouble and it’s back to Nese for a chinlock. It’s back to Cara for a moonsault to both villains and a springboard crossbody for two on Gulak. Everything breaks down and Cara suicide dives onto Nese. Dorado hits a shooting star press to pin Gulak at 3:17.

Rating: C+. The best thing they could do here is get them out of the ring quickly. This division isn’t working and there’s really no hiding that anymore. Would it really kill them to let some of these guys talk about something other than being athletes and wanting to prove that they’re the best in the world? Like, giving them some characters etc?

Stephanie McMahon invites herself to join Mick Foley’s Cell address.

Here are the bosses with Stephanie making fun of Foley’s red flannel suit. In what sounds like a Home Shopping Network ad, Foley and Stephanie talk about the Women’s Title match being inside the Cell and confirm it for a second time tonight. But wait: there’s more. In a THIRD Cell match, Seth Rollins will be challenging for Kevin Owens’ Raw World Title as well.

This brings out Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens to say Mick has outdone himself this week. Owens doesn’t want to be in the Cell because he doesn’t want to be an old, broken down man like Foley. Jericho wants to know if he and Kevin can have their own private jet if Mick is just throwing out presents. The recklessness involved in putting Owens in the Cell means FOLEY JUST MADE THE LIST! Foley: “I started the List.” Jericho: “YOU JUST MADE THE LIST AGAIN!”

Stephanie tells Jericho to show Foley respect (MAKE UP YOUR FREAKING MIND ALREADY STEPHANIE!!! TWO WEEKS AGO YOU TREATED FOLEY LIKE A THREE YEAR OLD AND NOW JERICHO NEEDS TO RESPECT HIM???) so she has an idea: if Jericho can beat Rollins tonight, he’s in the title match as a triple threat. Because Raw needs to top Smackdown’s triple threat!

Rollins says Stephanie loves to pull strings and is always five moves ahead. Tonight though, he’s going to ruin those plans by beating Jericho. Rollins wants to know what Owens is thinking though because Jericho might go into business for himself.

Curtis Axel/Bo Dallas vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass

And never mind as Anderson and Gallows jump Enzo and Cass from behind before the match starts. No match.

After a break, Axel and Dallas say they want a tag match.

Curtis Axel/Bo Dallas vs. Sami Zayn/Neville

Bo beats on Sami in the corner to start as we hear about Foley making three Cell matches. Well given that they were all challenges issues by wrestlers, that’s not the most impressive things in the world. Axel takes over on Sami and hits a good looking dropkick. Not that it matters as an exploder suplex sets up the Helluva Kick and the Red Arrow for the easy pin on Axel at 2:28.

Lana comes into Charlotte’s locker room and snipe at each other a bit.

R-Truth vs. Titus O’Neil

Apparently Titus is mad about Truth getting the commercial for Payday earlier tonight. Titus throws Truth around to start as Graves plugs the Titus Brand. Goldust gets on the steps for a distraction and Truth grabs a rollup (with Titus’ feet in the ropes) for the pin at 2:12. That’s the second distraction finish tonight.

TJ Perkins comes in to see Brian Kendrick and talks about how Kendrick deserves another shot at the title. They shake hands but Kendrick goes after him, earning a right hand from the champ.

Braun Strowman vs. Splash Brothers

The Brothers are Steven and Clay. Strowman treats them like you would expect and splashes Steven while Clay is on Braun’s back. A double dropkick puts the Brothers down and it’s a running powerslam for Clay. Steven is reversed chokeslammed onto his brother for the pin at 59 seconds.

Braun still wants better competition. In other words: nothing changed this week and the writers get to stretch it out even more.

Roman Reigns and Sasha talk strategy.

Of all things, we get the Rumble by the Numbers video. Tickets go on sale soon it seems.

Charlotte/Rusev vs. Roman Reigns/Sasha Banks

The genders have to match so we start with multiple tags before any contact. Rusev punches Reigns to start and a clothesline gets two. Reigns starts a comeback as the fans want Sasha. The villains are knocked to the floor and we take a break. Back with Reigns caught in a chinlock and more WE WANT SASHA chants. A Superman Punch allows the tag to Charlotte, meaning it’s off to Sasha to clean house. Wouldn’t it have been smarter to not have Rusev tag so the advantage isn’t lost? The double knees in the corner get two on Charlotte and the Bank Statement makes her tap at 9:48.

Rating: D+. Well that happened and it was nowhere near as amazing as the announcers tried to make it seem. The fans really didn’t seem to care about Rusev vs. Reigns as there’s almost no way Rusev is getting the title back and everyone knows it. There was nothing to the match anyway and the sudden ending didn’t help things.

Tom Phillips asks Jericho and Owens about the possible change to the title match at the pay per view. Jericho: “That’s a stupid idiom.” Jericho says if one of them is champion, both of them are champion. Owens throws Phillips out but since Tom doesn’t get out fast enough, HE MAKES THE LIST, under the name Felipe Thomastein.

We see the Goldberg clip again.

Here’s Paul Heyman to discuss said Goldberg comments but first we get another WWE2K17 video, this time of Lesnar vs. Goldberg. Heyman has heard people whispering about Goldberg returning for years now because they want one more spear and Jackhammer. You still hear the chants today and there they go again.

Everyone that got in the same ring as Goldberg was conquered while he was running parallel to Brock Lesnar. It keeps Heyman up at night that Goldberg is one up on Brock so as of tonight, Goldberg is officially challenged to a fight any place anytime. Goldberg can either live in the past or step in this ring and be conquered. In Suplex City, Goldberg is next.

Emmalina video.

TJ Perkins vs. Ariya Daivari

Non-title with Brian Kendrick on commentary. Daivari has to go to the ropes to get out of an early kneebar and we hit the chinlock on Perkins. A neckbreaker gets two on TJ but he comes right back with one of his own. The slingshot dropkick sets up the kneebar to make Daivari tap at 5:14.

Rating: D+. This might have been my breaking point for the division. These matches aren’t interesting and having random people who happened to be in the tournament job to Perkins isn’t helping things. It’s just a total misfit on this show and nothing they’re doing is making it any better. Either make it interesting or scrap the thing already.

Jericho and Stephanie run into each other with Chris saying he thought about putting her on the list. Stephanie is cool with that though, as long as the Raw triple threat beats Smackdown’s triple threat. Jericho needs to remember that Stephanie can’t help him inside the Cell. Not that Jericho asked about it but Stephanie seems to think everyone needs her help. Owens comes up and asks what that was about but Jericho just says friendship.

Hispanic Heritage Month video on Tito Santana. It’s nice to have it be about a wrestler again.

A Tweet from Goldberg says he’ll be on Raw next week.

Seth Rollins vs. Chris Jericho

If Jericho wins, the Universal Title match becomes a triple threat. Rollins doesn’t care for having a toothpick thrown in his face so he smacks Jericho around. A Blockbuster gets two for Seth and Jericho bails to the floor, only to get caught by a slingshot dropkick. Cue Owens for a distraction so Jericho can take over and we take a break.

Back with Jericho kicking Rollins off the top and slapping on an abdominal stretch. Rollins sends him face first into the middle turnbuckle and gets two off a Sling Blade (which Jericho called loudly). Seth goes up top and slams Jericho off, only to have his crossbody dropkicked out of the air. The low superkick gets two on Jericho but Owens offers a distraction, allowing Jericho to grab the Walls.

A belt shot from Owens gets the same and Rollins takes him down with a suicide dive. The springboard knee to the head gets two on Jericho but he avoids the frog splash. A Lionsault gives Jericho a near fall of his own but he misses a high crossbody. Jericho reverses the Pedigree into another Walls attempt, only to get small packaged for the pin at 19:14.

Rating: B-. The ending was more of a relief than anything else as I really, really didn’t need to sit through another triple threat title match, especially inside the Cell. Rollins vs. Owens isn’t the most interesting thing in the world but Jericho can go and do something else instead of trying to salvage this upper midcard feud.

Post match Owens and Jericho beat on Seth but Rollins fights back and gives Jericho a Pedigree as Owens bails to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. What is the top story on Raw right now? Is it the Lesnar vs. Goldberg? Jericho/Owens vs. Rollins? One half of Raw vs. Smackdown? Charlotte vs. Sasha? The problem is nothing is standing out right now and it’s hard to care about a bunch of stories that feel like they belong in the upper midcard. I can’t even blame it on Stephanie this week (though her defending Foley had my jaw dropping) because it’s a recurring problem. Owens has had his legs cut off as he’s really just an afterthought at the moment in what feels like multiple feuds.

There’s too much stuff going on near the top and the LONG list of midcard and lower card feuds and stories don’t help things. Tonight you had two cruiserweight matches, that stupid Titus Brand stuff, the random tag feuds and Braun Strowman and I’m probably forgetting some. They need to trim some of this stuff down and stop trying to throw so much bad, unfocused stuff at us at the same time.

Results

Kofi Kingston b. Cesaro – Small package

Bayley b. Cami Fields – Bayley to Belly

Sin Cara/Lince Dorado b. Drew Gulak/Tony Nese – Shooting star press to Nese

Sami Zayn/Neville b. Curtis Axel/Bo Dallas – Red Arrow to Axel

R-Truth b. Titus O’Neil – Rollup

Braun Strowman b. Splash Brothers – Reverse chokeslam to Steven

Sasha Banks/Roman Reigns b. Rusev/Charlotte – Bank Statement to Charlotte

TJ Perkins b. Ariya Daivari – Kneebar

Seth Rollins b. Chris Jericho – Small package

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Superstars – October 7, 2016: The Raw Alternative

Superstars
Date: October 7, 2016
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves

This is the kind of show you don’t often get in WWE: a quick and simple wrestling show where the in ring action is really all that matters. You’ll also get some highlights from this week’s Monday Night Raw while seeing some names that don’t often make it onto the major TV show. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Darren Young vs. Jinder Mahal

Dang it I can’t get away from Mahal. Darren works on the wrist to start and almost falls over while trying a swinging neckbreaker. Mahal pulls him out of the corner though and drops some knees from the middle rope for his first two. We hit the chinlock for a bit before another knee drop gets another two. Mahal has those long legs so it makes sense to use the knees that often. Back up and Young grabs a belly to back suplex onto the apron, followed by the Gut Check for the pin on Mahal at 4:21.

Rating: D. The wrestling was fine but these two combine for the personality of a chair. I’ll be very glad when the election is over and we can drop this making Darren Young great again nonsense. At least putting him on Superstars is better than making me watch him face Titus O’Neil every week on Raw.

We go back to Raw for the Roman Reigns/Rusev/Lana segment.

Here’s Roman Reigns to open the show and MY GOODNESS they’re booing him out of the building. WWE is asking for this one as Reigns just isn’t the kind of person who can go out there and talk full time. He goes into the guy line but here’s Lana to interrupt. Fans: “THANK YOU LANA!” With the accent slipping, Lana rips into Reigns for everything he’s done in recent weeks but Reigns just tells her to bring her husband out here if he wants that rematch.

Rusev comes out and the brawl is on again with the Bulgarian getting the better of it and knocking Reigns into the crowd. Rusev takes the belt and starts to walk up the ramp but Reigns sneaks up from behind him with a Superman Punch. Reigns grabs the mic and says they can have the rematch but it’s going to be inside the Cell.

Back to Raw and here’s most of New Day vs. Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens.

Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens vs. New Day

Non-title. Masterson and Kutcher are on commentary as Owens runs Woods over to start. Owens makes sure to jump over Xavier in the kind of funny bit that most people just don’t think to do. Woods gets taken into the corner for the double teaming as Kutcher talks about their new show. It’s off to Big E. to face Owens for some hip swiveling.

Graves says Saxton would be the Fez (character on That 70s Show, on which Masterson and Kutcher starred) of the commentary table, which sounds like a good insult, assuming you find dating Mila Kunis’ character to be a bad thing. Big E. gets beaten down even more as the announcers discuss middle names and scarves.

Back from a break with Owens and Big E. colliding off a double clothesline. Woods comes in and gets chinlocked before it’s back to Jericho for a running clothesline in the corner. A superplex is broken up and Woods gets two off a high crossbody. Owens breaks up a hot tag attempt and gets two off a DDT.

Cue Seth Rollins to the stage for a distraction though and Woods gets in an enziguri. The hot tag brings in Big E. to clean house (and swivel the hips of course) but Owens superkicks him down. Big E. and Owens go to the floor and Jericho gets the Liontamer on Woods, only to have Rollins offer a distraction. A quick Midnight Hour puts Jericho away at 16:25.

Rating: C-. This was much longer than it needed to be and served little more purpose than to have Kutcher and Masterson there to plug their new show. It’s a really bad sign that this is what the World Champion is being used for: a second hour tag match with little to gain other than helping set up a Netflix show. Well done WWE. It’s good to see what you think of what should be your flagship star. Masterson and Kutcher were both fine and seemed to be having a lot of fun, which is much better than you’re going to get out of most guest stars.

Rollins gives Jericho a Pedigree to really get under Owens’ skin.

Neville vs. Curtis Axel

Axel slams him to start and it’s already time to pose. A rollup gets one for Neville but Axel drives in some knees to the robes to take over again. We get the front flips across the corner and a dropkick sends Axel outside. That means a running flip dive but it’s way too early for the Red Arrow as Neville is kicked out to the floor. Back from a break with Axel hitting a great looking dropkick and grabbing an armbar chinlock. The Axehole (that neckbreaker faceplant that Axel used to use as a finisher before it stopped finishing anyone) gets two and it’s an enziguri into the Red Arrow for the pin on Axel at 7:18.

Rating: D+. Not the most exciting match in the world but I liked it better than the opener. Granted that’s probably due to having Neville in there instead of someone like Young as there’s so much more charisma in the second match. Axel continues to be someone that could go somewhere if they gave him the right story but there’s been too many losses and too much time gone over the years to make it work without something major.

Long recap of Charlotte vs. Sasha, going all the way back to the BFF’s days in NXT. They’ve both been fighting to prove themselves as the best in the world and have traded the title over the last few months.

Hispanic Heritage Month video on Cesar Chavez.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Charlotte is defending and we get Big Match Intros. Sasha kicks her outside and hits a suicide dive, setting up a break less than thirty seconds in. Back with Charlotte in control and working on the back with a backbreaker (makes sense) and a hard shove into the corner. Sasha blocks the big boot and gets two off the double knees.

The champ is sent outside but is still able to drop Sasha’s back onto the apron. Sasha tries to go up top but gets knocked onto the ropes for a nasty crash. Charlotte’s superplex is shoved off and double knees from the top get two. It’s too early for the Bank Statement though so Charlotte sends her outside, setting up a CORKSCREW MOONSAULT TO THE FLOOR! I mean it made almost no contact but it looked awesome. Natural Selection gets two back inside and Charlotte is frustrated. A headscissors sets up the Bank Statement and Charlotte taps in a hurry to give Sasha the title at 14:17.

Rating: B. Good match but they felt out of sync at the end. That missed moonsault didn’t help things and the ending felt like it was out of nowhere. Sasha winning makes the most sense and, dare I say, sets up a rematch inside the Cell? They’ll have a rematch one way or another and it needs a little something more than just a regular match.

A long celebration ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show’s rating depends on whether or not you’re factoring in the bonus footage. With the bonus and far more important stuff being thrown in, I could easily see why people would prefer this over the full three hour version. Oddly you could skip the original wrestling and just watch the stuff from Raw to get your fill of Monday’s show in far less time. It’s a perfectly entertaining and quick show, which makes it very different from Raw.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Superstars – September 30, 2016: Now With More People You Won’t See On This Show

Superstars
Date: September 30, 2016
Location: US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves

I don’t normally do this show but I was in the arena live for the taping so I might as well take a look at the show. This was taped before last week’s Monday Night Raw and now serves as the night’s dark matches. Superstars tends to be completely forgotten and there’s a good chance that’s justified. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence, featuring a bunch of people you won’t be seeing on this show.

Sami Zayn vs. Curtis Axel

Not a bad choice to fire up the crowd. Axel takes him down by the arm to start so Sami does his big spin out to escape. Sami’s reverse leapfrog sets up some armdrags into an armbar and the fans are very pleased. Some right hands and a good looking dropkick put Zayn down but Axel spends a bit too much time yelling. The exploder suplex sets up the Helluva Kick to give Sami the pin at 4:40.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one but Sami is the perfect choice to open a show and fire the fans up. There’s just something so easy to cheer about Sami and it hasn’t failed him yet. For the life of me I don’t know why he’s stuck on the midcard treadmill when Smackdown is dying for talent and Zayn can’t even get on Raw most weeks.

We see a long stretch, as in the better part of five minutes, of Roman Reigns vs. Rusev from Raw.

We see Charlotte, Dana Brooke and Sasha Banks’ segment from Raw. This is much closer to being complete so here it is in full.

Here are Charlotte and Dana Brooke for a chat. Charlotte says last night was another chance for everyone to be disappointed because that’s what she does time after time. She’s not the huggable Bayley or the internet darling Sasha Banks. Cue Sasha to say that’s her title because Charlotte didn’t beat her last night. Sasha is owed a one on one match and she wants it right now. Charlotte tells the YESing fans to be quiet so she can tell Sasha that she’ll get her rematch….next week. Sasha cleans house and the villains leave.

Neville vs. Jinder Mahal

This would be another option that could have picked the crowd up during Raw but nah, we needed three minutes of Stephanie yelling at Foley instead. To no one’s surprise, Mahal comes out to crickets. Neville grabs a headlock to start as we hear about Mahal talking trash about NXT stars coming up through the ranks. So yeah, this actually has a story to it. Mahal’s armbar doesn’t do much to shake his image of being really boring so Neville handsprings across the ring and hits something like a hurricanrana. The tease of a dive scares Mahal to the barricade and we take a break.

Back with Mahal missing a charge and falling outside again, only to have him send Neville ribs first into the apron. A basement dropkick puts Neville down and a big boot to the face gets two. Neville comes back with his series of kicks, including a big one to knock Mahal out of the air. The Red Arrow puts Mahal away at 8:55.

Rating: D. I don’t know how many more ways I can say Mahal is boring but it’s the biggest problem with so many wrestlers today. There’s no real character there and his in ring abilities aren’t enough to make me want to watch anything he does. This was longer than it needed to be with Neville doing what he could but having nothing to work with in Mahal.

Most of Kevin Owens on the Highlight Reel (minus anything with Enzo and Cass) ends the show.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel. Jericho tells us to be quiet about a dozen times because this is the most anticipated Highlight Reel in WWE history. Before Owens comes out here though, Jericho has a bone to pick with Masterson and Kutchner, who have the nerve to claim that they’re better friends. Jericho: “THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE!” That’s so unthinkable that they’re both about to make the List of Jericho.

It’s almost time for Owens to come out but Jericho yells at the cameraman for shooting him from the wrong side, which means HE MADE THE LIST! Rollins is on there too because he got hurt again last night. Owens comes out and praises the Jeritron 5000 but says he’s not about to wear a suit for a place like Cincinnati, Ohio. What kind of town can this be when it created Dean Ambrose? Jericho: “HE STILL OWES ME $17,000!” Owens moves on to Rollins and says the rib injury is karma after all the people Seth injured over the last year and a half. Cue Rollins but security and Foley pull him back.

Overall Rating: D+. I see why I don’t watch this show most of the time. It’s basically just a long recap show with some dark matches filling in the gaps. That being said, there’s a reason this is little more than D level programming to fill in time on the Network and to satisfy international commitments. It was fine enough but nothing worth going out of your way to see whatsoever.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Monday Night Raw – September 26, 2016: I Didn’t Want It To Be This Way

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 26, 2016
Location: US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We’re past Clash of Champions and this is going to be an interesting show. The key here is Raw’s competition as they’re up against Monday Night Football and a Presidential debate that is likely going to break a lot of viewership records. Kevin Owens is still Raw World Champion and Roman Reigns picked up the US Title from Rusev last night it’s time to start looking towards the Cell. Let’s get to it.

One more note: I was in the arena for the show last night so this is my second time seeing this.

There’s no intro as we’re heading straight for the opening match. Translation: PLEASE DON’T CHANGE THE CHANNEL YET! I can completely accept this.

US Title: Roman Reigns vs. Rusev

Rematch from last night with Reigns defending. The fans want Lana as Rusev takes him down with a front facelock. That’s going to keep the people from watching the debate. Reigns is cheered quite strongly as he kips out of a headscissors but gets double legged back to the mat.

Rusev gets one off a suplex and starts in on Reigns’ back. The nine corner clotheslines get Reigns out of trouble but he can’t lift Rusev up for the powerbomb because of the back injury. We take a break and come back with Rusev putting on a bearhug to keep up the simple psychology. A dropkick hits Reigns in the mouth and some gutwrench suplexes get two. Back to the waistlock as the match slows down again.

Reigns fights up with more clotheslines and a big boot but the Superman Punch is countered, sending them both falling out to the floor. We come back from another break with Reigns headbutting him off the top and hitting a middle rope clothesline. Geez man enough with the Lex Luger style offense.

Reigns still can’t powerbomb him so Rusev gets in a spinwheel kick. More headbutts and another kick to the head give Rusev another two. Reigns’ latest comeback is stopped with a superkick and the fans are really getting into this in a way you almost never hear for a Reigns match. The Accolade is broken up but Lana offers a distraction to break up the Superman Punch. The apron kick staggers Rusev (and gets a great reaction from the crowd) and they fight into the crowd for a double countout at 25:38.

Rating: B. The match was another good outing for the two of them and the ending sets up a rematch in the Cell, which is going to receive a divided reception depending on your taste in Cell matches. Maybe it was just the Cincinnati crowd or maybe it’s because he’s in the midcard instead of the main event but Reigns was getting a great reaction here. This is the kind of role he’s made for: an athletic freak who can take a beating and give out one of his own. Good match here.

Post match Rusev gets a chair and hits Reigns over the back. They get inside and Reigns gets in a spear to put Rusev down. Reigns sits in the chair and poses with the belt before hitting Rusev with the chair to even things up.

WWE2K17 ad with Ambrose’s appearance getting a huge pop.

Here’s Mick Foley for a chat about last night’s Cesaro vs. Sheamus match. The thought of the series ending in a draw seemed to be a mathematical impossibility (not really) but that’s what’s happened. Foley brings out Sheamus and Cesaro with Sheamus almost immediately cutting him off to say this was about physical dominance.

Cesaro talks about doctors holding Sheamus back last night and an argument breaks out over who was more dominant. Foley cuts them off to say they’re both right and they’re both getting a championship opportunity…..which they’re getting together as they’re fighting for the Tag Team Titles. Cesaro: “SAY WHAT???” Foley tells them to get over it and just team together because that’s his decision.

I had a very bad feeling that this was where they were going and while it’s not the worst idea in the world (Raw is dying for tag teams at the moment), it feels like the TNA way of getting here: a bunch of matches that did nothing but fill time until we get to the end result. Sheamus and Cesaro had some good matches (even one very good one) but they drove the feud into the ground to the point where I didn’t care how good the matches were since I had absolutely no desire to watch them.

And now, none of that matters because they’re basically saying the whole thing was a tie and we’re just going to do something different. It comes off as lazy booking and a way to fill in time, which is one of the worst things you can do in wrestling. I’m sure they’ll be a decent team but they better not cut New Day’s title reign off this close to the record.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows

New Day is defending in a rematch from last night after Xavier Woods used Francesca II. The match starts fast with Kofi having to dodge a diving Anderson. It’s off to Big E. for the Unicorn Stampede with Woods blowing the trombone in time with the stomps. Gallows, apparently not a music fan, pulls Big E. out to the floor and superkicks him in the face.

Anderson adds a running kick to the face for two and the champs are in quick trouble. Gallows gets in a chokeslam and we take a break. Anderson’s powerbomb gets two and we hear about Demolition’s title reign being in reach. A kick to the head finally allows the hot tag to Big E. for the suplexes. Big E. misses a charge into the post though and a running boot to the face gets two.

That’s enough of being on defense for Big E. so he spears Anderson through the ropes, setting up the Midnight Hour for two with Gallows making the save. Kofi is sent shoulder first into the steps and the Magic Killer gets a very close two on Big E. They had me on that near fall. A VERY bloody Kofi comes back in and hits Trouble in Paradise to pin Anderson and retain the titles at 11:03.

Rating: C+. They’re doing really well at making me buy into the title changes here and that’s hard to do when it comes to a regular TV title defense. Anderson and Gallows are done as challengers now and I’m really not sure where they go from here. Sheamus and Cesaro are fine for placeholder challengers but New Day really should break the record when they’re this close. It would be a waste of time not to.

We look at Kevin Owens injuring Seth Rollins’ ribs in their match at Clash of Champions. Stephanie McMahon sent a second referee down for the count, seconds after Rollins would have had the title won. After the show ended, HHH arrived and asked Stephanie how it went (“Great.”).

Sheamus and Cesaro (back in his suit) are bickering when Foley comes in. Mick starts yelling about how much potential these two have together because they could shake up the tag division. He’ll even give them a chance tonight in a tag match. Foley showed a lot of fire here, as is his custom. Remember that.

Bayley vs. Anna Fields

Fields chokes her on the ropes to start and we hit an early chinlock. Bayley comes back with her elbows and clotheslines, setting up a quick Bayley to Belly for the pin at 2:04.

Post match Bayley says she’s not done with Sasha and Charlotte after that triple threat because she wants to hug that Women’s Title.

And now, the bad part of the show. Foley goes in to see Stephanie and asks about the referee issue in last night’s main event and telling HHH it was great. Stephanie ERUPTS on Foley, talking about how it should have been his responsibility to get a new referee out there. Instead, he was probably with Sheamus and Cesaro because he thinks with his heart instead of his head. She hired him because of his mind as a businessman (Huh?) and wants him to be more like her. Instead of showing the fire he had earlier, Foley just stands there and takes this because she’s Stephanie.

This is every problem with Stephanie rolled into one promo. Not only is it part of a story that is taking WAY too long to go anywhere (I’d be shocked if we get any real resolution before the Royal Rumble) but this is Mick Foley, a three time WWE World Champion and a WWE Hall of Famer. He’s one of the best talkers with some of the best fire of all time but he’s standing here cowering in front of Stephanie because that’s what happens to people around her.

Brock Lesnar, Charlotte, Sting, Roman Reigns and now Mick Foley all have nothing to say back to her because she’s Stephanie and the most intimidating presence of all time. Oh except for when she’s fun Stephanie who dances with kids and is just a regular soccer mom. This has been going on for years now (keep in mind that Stephanie debuted SEVENTEEN YEARS AGO and first became an authority figure in 2000) and if we’re lucky she gets one bit of comeuppance a year. Other than that it’s all Stephanie browbeating everyone else and if you don’t like it, deal with it because she’s Stephanie.

Rich Swann/Cedric Alexander vs. Drew Gulak/Lince Dorado

Swann and Alexander get an inset promo talking about how they’re here to have fun but they’re not underestimating their opponents. This didn’t air in the arena and it would have helped quite a bit. Gulak and Dorado get their Cruiserweight Classic videos and again they’re better than nothing. We get the big handshake to start for a compliment to the purple ropes, which take forever to set up and take down.

Dorado and Swann trade headscissors to start and nip into a stalemate. Everything breaks down and Dorado moonsaults onto all three as we take an early break. Back with Drew holding Swann in a chinlock before it’s back to Dorado for some chops. The hot tag bring in Alexander for some forearms and a running kick to Gulak’s head. A Lumbar Check sends Dorado to the floor and Swann sunset flips Gulak for the pin at 8:25.

Rating: C. This was the big popcorn break match of the night and it’s still not hard to see why. Again, the wrestling is fine but the whole division is being wedged into a show that is already bloated. Swann and Alexander have some personality but Dorado and Gulak are just warm bodies in the eyes of the fans. It’s better than last week but they still need some adjustments to make people care.

Cesaro/Sheamus vs. Nick Cutler/Willis Williams

Cesaro takes Cutler over with a one armed delayed vertical suplex but Sheamus drops to the floor instead of tagging in. For some reason he gets on the apron with his back to the ring so Cesaro can tag him in with a slap. The ten forearms make it even worse for Cutler and it’s off to Williams, who is taken down with a hard clothesline. The jobbers actually start working on Cesaro’s arm for a few seconds before Sheamus Brogue Kicks both guys. Cesaro pins the unconscious Williams at 3:33.

Rating: D+. This was exactly what it needed to be, though it’s still forced and something that should have come months ago without the long feud in the first place. We haven’t had a wacky partnership that went somewhere important since Kane and Daniel Bryan so this is as good as anything else they have.

Video on TJ Perkins.

TJ talks about wanting to be here for eighteen years but here’s Brian Kendrick to interrupt. Kendrick says it’s his title to win because Perkins owes him for his career. A brawl is teased and they’ll fight at some point in the future.

Here are Charlotte and Dana Brooke for a chat. Charlotte says last night was another chance for everyone to be disappointed because that’s what she does time after time. She’s not the huggable Bayley or the internet darling Sasha Banks. Cue Sasha to say that’s her title because Charlotte didn’t beat her last night. Sasha is owed a one on one match and she wants it right now. Charlotte tells the YESing fans to be quiet so she can tell Sasha that she’ll get her rematch….next week. Sasha cleans house and the villains leave.

Rollins is on his way to the ring to interrupt the upcoming Highlight Reel but Foley cuts him off because Seth isn’t medically cleared. All Rollins can hear are Stephanie’s words coming out of Mick’s mouth.

TJ Perkins vs. Tony Nese

Non-title with both guys being TNA castoffs because they’re dumb that way. The much stronger Nese throws Perkins around to start and he cartwheels out of TJ’s ankle scissors to show off. An early kneebar attempt doesn’t work for TJ as Nese sends him outside for a superkick and a big dive to take us to a break. Back with Perkins grabbing a Black Widow but getting planted with a reverse gutwrench suplex.

The fans chant for Harambe (the gorilla who was shot at the Cincinnati Zoo, which was a recurring trend all night long) and CM Punk as TJ fights back with uppercuts and a jumping neckbreaker out of the corner. A gutbuster looks to set up a tornado DDT but Perkins is draped over the top rope instead. TJ is right back up with the fireman’s carry into an enziguri (Fans: “RANDY SAVAGE!”) and the kneebar makes Nese tap at 8:50.

Rating: C+. I know the fans don’t care but this was entertaining stuff, partially because we have a reason to care about Perkins. Something as simple as being the champion tells us more about him than we know about anyone else and the announcers did a good job of building Nese up as the perfect athlete who could take down the champ. Good little match here, though the fans really didn’t care.

Hispanic Heritage Month video on Pedro Morales.

Sasha vs. Charlotte and Perkins vs. Kendrick for the respective titles next week.

Ashton Kutcher and Danny Masterson are going to be in Los Angeles next week to take care of Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel. Jericho tells us to be quiet about a dozen times because this is the most anticipated Highlight Reel in WWE history. Before Owens comes out here though, Jericho has a bone to pick with Masterson and Kutchner, who have the nerve to claim that they’re better friends. Jericho: “THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE!” That’s so unthinkable that they’re both about to make the List of Jericho.

It’s almost time for Owens to come out but Jericho yells at the cameraman for shooting him from the wrong side, which means HE MADE THE LIST! Rollins is on there too because he got hurt again last night. Owens comes out and praises the Jeritron 5000 but says he’s not about to wear a suit for a place like Cincinnati, Ohio. What kind of town can this be when it created Dean Ambrose? Jericho: “HE STILL OWES ME $17,000!”

Owens moves on to Rollins and says the rib injury is karma after all the people Seth injured over the last year and a half. Cue Rollins but security and Foley pull him back. Instead here are Enzo Amore and Big Cass to interrupt and ask Jericho how they’re doing. Jericho says they’re just fine but Enzo and Cass ARE ON THE LIST.

After Owens corrects Jericho’s spelling, Cass accuses Jericho of being Santa Claus. Jericho: “Maybe I am Santa Claus! Maybe I’ll come down there and sit on your lap!” Cass points out that people sit on Santa’s lap but Jericho said he was going to punch Cass in the face. A fan poll makes Jericho even angrier but as it turns out, Foley just made a match between these four.

Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens

Jericho and Enzo start us off but first we need to pause for the scarf removal. An armdrag has Jericho so frustrated that he crawls over for a hug from Owens. Kevin comes in and gets dropped by Cass so it’s time to launch another human being over the top rope as a projectile. Sidewalk slams have the Canadians in trouble but Jericho sidesteps a charge to send Cass outside as we take a break.

Back with Enzo pounding on Jericho in the corner and getting two off a high crossbody. Owens offers a quick distraction though and it’s time for the villains to take over. Thankfully that means Owens doing Enzo’s dance across the apron because he knows how to mock a crowd. Jericho and Owens take turns beating on Enzo with Owens handling the trash talking (“THAT’S THE LEAD SINGER OF FOZZY!”).

Enzo blocks a superplex but dives into a dropkick, setting up Owens’ backsplash for two. Owens to the referee: “I’m the Universal Champion!” Referee: “It was two!” Owens: “But he shouldn’t even be out of NXT yet!” Enzo finally gets in a right hand to make the tag off to Cass for the house cleaning. For some reason Jericho decides to slap Cass, earning himself a boot to the face. The two of them head outside and it’s Enzo hitting his middle rope DDT for two on Owens. The powerbomb puts Amore away at 16:37.

Rating: C. Owens’ trash talking aside, this was just your standard main event tag. Enzo and Cass are fine for this role and it’s already more entertaining than seeing them talk about buying a timeshare in Puerto Rico. They’re still making sure to protect Cass and it’s way too early to even think about a split so this is about as good as it’s going to get for them at the moment.

The show wraps up just after the match ends. Post show, Owens and Jericho kept beating on Enzo until Sami Zayn came out for the save. Posing ensued to close out the night.

Overall Rating: D+. This show suffered had the same problem as so many others: burnout. The first half hour was a good, hard hitting match, followed by an entertaining Tag Team Title match. Then it was Stephanie treating Foley like a dog who tracked mud into her house and a cruiserweight tag match that didn’t need to be on the show.

The main event was a nice pick up but they really need something to fire the crowd up in the middle. Maybe a Sami Zayn match instead of putting him on Superstars? At the end of the day, three hours is too much on TV and it’s even worse when you’re watching it live. The show has good stuff on it but that good stuff is dragged down by so many other things, the biggest of which is just time itself. It wasn’t a horrible show but you could tell when the debate came on because the show just gave up.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Clash of Champions 2016: Champions Clashing At A Champion’s Level

Clash of Champions 2016
Date: September 25, 2016
Location: Bankers Life Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s the first Raw only pay per view and things are starting to get interesting around here. Tonight’s main event is Seth Rollins challenging Kevin Owens for the WWE Universal Championship but the big question is what role HHH will play in the whole thing. Other than that we have Roman Reigns challenging Rusev for the US Title and New Day defending the Raw Tag Team Titles against Anderson and Gallows. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Alicia Fox vs. Nia Jax

Rematch from Raw when Jax mauled Alicia in a no contest. Fox runs right at her with a dropkick but gets rammed hard into the buckle for her efforts. Something like a half nelson chinlock keeps Fox in trouble and her kicks to the head have no effect. Back up and Nia misses a charge in the corner, allowing Fox to get in a few dropkicks to little avail. A high crossbody sets up the scissors kick for two and that’s probably it for Alicia. Nia runs her over and hits her Samoan drop for the pin at 4:56.

Rating: D+. That’s exactly what this should have been as Fox gave her just a little more challenge than usual but there was little doubt about what was going to happen here. Nia should be one of the next challengers to the Women’s Title and it would be cool to see her against some of the top stars in the division soon. Alicia was fine here and looked as good as she always does.

The opening video focuses completely on the titles and what it means to be champion. It’s exactly what you would expect here and nothing out of the box whatsoever.

Raw Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows

New Day is defending but first they have to talk about two guys trying to split them from their titles like Brangelina. Of course, Anderson and Gallows are the kind of guys who give out raisins at Halloween and wear tube socks with flip flops. Anderson and Gallows start fast by taking out Big E. on the floor and Liger Bombing Kofi for a close two in the first thirty seconds. Even Woods takes a beating on the floor and has Francesca II thrown at his feet.

Kofi can’t get a sunset flip so he dropkicks Gallows instead and makes the diving tag off to Big E. The Warrior Splash crushes Anderson but he knees Big E. in the face to block the spear through the ropes. Gallows comes in off another tag and the Boot of Doom gets two with Kofi having to dive in for a save. It’s back to Kofi, who dives right into a spinebuster for two more.

Anderson and Gallows are a step ahead of them here and it’s working really well. A chokeslam plants Kofi but he gets out of the Magic Killer. Big E. tags himself back in and it’s Trouble in Paradise into the Big Ending but Gallows pulls Big E. out at the last second. Kofi dives onto Gallows and Woods gets in a Francesca shot, setting up the Midnight Hour to retain the titles at 6:38.

Rating: B+. Where in the world have they been hiding this? They rocked this one throughout and it’s one of the fastest paced opening matches I’ve seen in a very long time. That win should give New Day Demolition’s record (which they would get in the middle of December) and that’s going to be a big deal. I’m not sure who challenges them next, unless they go with the Sheamus/Cesaro nightmare I’ve been thinking of for a few weeks now. I loved this though and it was giving me flashbacks to Damien Sandow vs. John Cena: not the most technically classic stuff but I was WAY into the near falls.

WWE Network ad, including Hulk Hogan.

We recap the Cruiserweight Title match which doesn’t have much of a story. TJ Perkins won the title in the Cruiserweight Classic and Brian Kendrick won a four way on Monday to get the shot.

Perkins says he’s nervous but knows what it takes to get here. Kendrick knows the same thing but TJ is confident he’s keeping his title. WHY WAS THIS NOT ON RAW????

Cruiserweight Title: TJ Perkins vs. Brian Kendrick

Kendrick is challenging. Perkins comes out to a video game style theme as we hear about Kendrick driving Perkins to wrestling lessons because TJ didn’t have a driver’s license yet. They trade waistlock takedowns to start and Kendrick slows it down with a headlock. The threat of a kneebar sends Kendrick bailing to the ropes and the floor.

TJ goes after the veteran and gets caught in a veteran move as Kendrick ties him up in the ring skirt. Back in and TJ grabs a Muta Lock but Kendrick drops him throat first across the top rope to start in on the neck. Kendrick stretches on the neck and kicks at the head, only to have TJ come back with a double chickenwing into an atomic drop.

Three Amigos look to set up something on top but Kendrick breaks it up. That’s fine with TJ as he dives off the top with a hurricanrana to take Brian from the apron to the floor. Back in again and the Captain’s Hook is countered into the kneebar but Brian gets out and grabs Sliced Bread #2. Perkins pops back up and hits a modified enziguri to set up the kneebar to retain at 10:32.

Rating: C+. Who is TJ Perkins, who is Brian Kendrick and why should I care? Neither guy has a character, neither guy is overly interesting and I only saw one of them on Raw. What was supposed to be interesting here and who was I even supposed to cheer for? They’ve got a LONG way to go with this match and letting them have a pretty standard match on pay per view with no story isn’t going to get them anywhere.

Post match Perkins gets interview time but Kendrick comes in for a handshake, which turns into a headbutt to the champ.

Cesaro is ready for the final match in the best of seven series. Aren’t we all.

We look back at matches 1-6.

Sheamus vs. Cesaro

It’s the final match in the best of seven series and the winner gets a championship opportunity, whatever that’s going to mean. Sheamus starts fast with some right hands but gets uppercut off the apron. The uppercut train makes things worse for Sheamus so he goes for the bad shoulder to take over. A top rope clothesline gets two on Cesaro but he stops a charging Sheamus by raising a boot.

Cesaro’s DDT gets two and he actually follows it up with a 619 of all things. Well that’s fresh. Three straight Irish Curses get two for Sheamus and we hit the Cloverleaf. The Brogue Kick is countered into the Swing which sets up the Sharpshooter to make Sheamus scream. Unfortunately it doesn’t make him tap (meaning the feud would be over) so Cesaro kicks him out to the floor instead.

There’s a suicide dive and both guys are down with Cesaro LANDING ON HIS HEAD. He’s all shaken up (understandably so) but the Brogue Kick still only gets two. The Neutralizer gets the same so they do the big slugout with Cesaro getting the better of it, only to have Sheamus pull himself to the top.

Cesaro is right there with a dropkick and they head to the top with Cesaro falling off but catching a diving Sheamus with an uppercut. White Noise on the floor has Cesaro in even more trouble but he posts Sheamus and sends him over the barricade. Both guys are stunned and somehow this isn’t a countout yet. Cesaro’s arm is banged up and the match is a no contest at 16:49.

Rating: B. I WAS KIDDING ABOUT THIS THING CONTINUING!!! Geez man why can’t they follow my good ideas? It was entertaining stuff for a power brawl but sweet goodness I stopped caring at least a month ago. We’ve seen them do this stuff so many times that it just isn’t fun to watch anymore. Good match but REALLY tired story.

Sheamus has to be carried to the back as Cesaro wants to keep fighting.

Charlotte laughs at Bayley for thinking she belongs here when Bayley can’t even beat Sasha.

Sami Zayn vs. Chris Jericho

Not much of a story to this one other than Sami wanting to fight Jericho, who is Owens’ friend. Sami gets going a bit too fast with a right hand in the corner but gets punched in the face for his efforts. They head outside with Sami hitting the moonsault off the barricade but the referee accidentally blocks Sami from getting back in, allowing Jericho to get in the springboard dropkick.

Another quick beating on the floor sets up a chinlock on Sami but he fights up and hits his big flip dive to the floor. Back in and a Michinoku Driver gets two for Sami, only to have Jericho score with a step up enziguri. The Lionsault hits knees so Sami sends him outside for the diving DDT. Sami misses a Helluva Kick though and has to counter the Walls into a small package. The Blue Thunder Bomb gets another near fall so Jericho grabs a Codebreaker for the quick pin at 15:19.

Rating: B-. How in the world did that go fifteen minutes? Maybe I’m still trying to get over Cesaro and Sheamus continuing but this was hard to get into. Jericho winning the first match is fine as Sami is much better when he’s fighting from behind so I’m hoping this doesn’t wrap up immediately.

Stephanie McMahon and Mick Foley give Owens a pep talk. Owens is going to do what matters tonight: try to impress HHH. Oh and show that Rollins is the mistake instead of the man.

We recap the Women’s Title match with Charlotte defending against Bayley and Sasha Banks. Charlotte injured Sasha and took the title at Summerslam but Bayley debuted and pinned the champ. A triple threat #1 contenders match was inconclusive so here’s another triple threat for the title.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Bayley

Charlotte, with Dana Brooke in her corner, is defending and Sasha takes her straight to the floor to take over. Back in and the challengers knock Charlotte outside so it’s time for a big standoff. Charlotte gets inside again and is chopped right back down, allowing Sasha to tie her in the Tree of Woe.

Some running knees to the chest have Charlotte in trouble but Bayley takes her down and drops the running knee on Charlotte’s chest. Dana finally does something by pulling Bayley to the floor with Charlotte and Sasha quickly following. A hard shot to Sasha’s face has Charlotte in control but Sasha comes back with a headscissors and forearms. Bayley comes back in with a crossbody and running shoulders/knees in the corner. A miss sets up Sasha’s knees to both of them in the corner with Bayley getting the worst of it.

Sasha gets all serious with the forearms but takes too much time going after Dana, allowing Charlotte to hit an STO of all things. Some near falls are exchanged and all three are down despite only Charlotte taking a big shot in the form of a Bayley to Belly. Charlotte gets double teamed for a bit but is still able to slam both of them down. A great looking double moonsault gets two on each and Natural Selection has Bayley in trouble.

Banks makes the save with the Bank Statement but Dana makes the save, leaving Bayley to grab a rollup for two more. Bayley has to break up another Bank Statement on Charlotte so Sasha puts her in the same hold. This time it’s Charlotte with the save and she throws Sasha into the barricade to make it worse. Back in and Charlotte kicks Bayley into Sasha, setting up a big boot to retain the title at 15:32.

Rating: B+. They’re nailing the wrestling tonight and the women have another awesome match because they just can. This was all kinds of fun with Charlotte looking great (especially with that moonsault), Sasha being her usual tough self and Bayley looking more than capable of hanging with either of them. If you give these women the chance to do something special, they’re going to knock it out of the park one day.

Kickoff show recap.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Rusev. Reigns started going after US Champion Rusev and even ruined his wedding celebration by shoving Lana into a cake. Now normally that would be a heel act but it’s Roman Reigns so we’ll go with it. The match was scheduled to take place last month but Reigns attacked Rusev before the match. Again: acts of a hero.

US Title: Rusev vs. Roman Reigns

Rusev is defending. They strike it out to start with Rusev being knocked out to the floor. Back in and Rusev gets two off a spinwheel kick as the fans go with LET’S GO RUSEV/RUSEV SUCKS. That’s certainly a new one. Now they switch over to the same thing for Reigns which fits a bit better. Some kicks to the ribs have Reigns in trouble but he comes back with clotheslines like any good face would. I mean, Reigns isn’t a good face but that’s what they do.

Reigns goes shoulder first into the post and the fans chant for CM Punk. Oh come on. We’re seven minutes in. There’s no way Punk can last that long. Back in and Rusev grabs a waistlock so we get a DELETE chant. A Samoan drop puts Rusev on the floor and Reigns hammers away but realizes this has to be back inside.

Rusev kicks him in the head for two but Reigns comes right back with a Superman Punch. The spear hits so Lana pulls the referee out and gets ejected as a result. Reigns gets in some apron kicks but gets caught in the Accolade. As you might expect, Reigns powers out and hits the spear to win the title at 17:11.

Rating: C+. As usual this was good but I have no reason to cheer Roman after any of this. Reigns is still a jerk and a horrible face in the vein of Diesel (who, also like Reigns, was screwed up by poor booking). He’s fine in between the bells but the setup is always lousy and I have no reason to cheer for him because he barely has a character.

Rollins tells Stephanie and Mick that he’s going to prove them wrong.

We recap the main event. Owens won the vacant Universal Title and Rollins was granted a rematch by Mick Foley. The real story here though is which of these two can impress HHH as Owens wants to prove him right but Rollins wants to prove him wrong. In other words: the wrestlers are here for the sake of impressing the bosses because that’s how WWE works.

Raw World Title: Seth Rollins vs. Kevin Owens

Rollins is challenging and has to go after Owens as he heads to the floor early on. The champ is dropped in a heap so Rollins throws him back inside for some chops in the corner. A Blockbuster gets two but it’s too early for the Pedigree or the springboard knee. The champ gets smart by kicking Rollins in the knee and hitting a great looking spike DDT. Some kicks to the back get two more and Owens stays on the knee.

A big backdrop over the top sends Rollins down hard onto the knee and Owens follows with a Cactus Elbow. We hit the chinlock and Owens promises to make Rollins fade to black. Owens: “FADE TO BLACK! GET IT???” After some shouting about being the foundation, Owens gets turned inside out with a clothesline. A quick backbreaker gets two for Seth and it’s time for the Spanish announce table.

That’s for later apparently as Rollins takes him back inside for a Pedigree attempt, only to have Kevin superkick him in the leg. Rollins hits the jumping knee to the head but gets superkicked again. Seth gets in an enziguri before going down though and both guys are stunned. The springboard knee is countered into the pumphandle backbreaker for two on Seth so Owens goes up.

A super gutbuster (ala Dean Malenko) sets up a quick frog splash for two more and both guys are down. Owens takes it back to the floor and sets up the other table. A quick SUCK IT to the referee and another to Rollins sets up a missed backsplash. Back in and Seth gets in a frog splash of his own for a near fall of his own.

Rollins throws in his own SUCK IT and the Pedigree gets two with Chris Jericho coming out to put Owens’ foot on the ropes. A chase scene gives us the obvious ref bump and of course Rollins gets the Pedigree a few seconds later. Jericho interferes again but gets sent outside, allowing Seth to hit a suicide dive. Owens takes one as well but here’s another referee as Owens hits the Pop Up Powerbomb to retain at 25:09.

Rating: B. They really couldn’t have HHH come out there so the feud could actually go somewhere? Owens winning is the right call as it’s too early for him to lose yet (you know, aside from losing to Reigns on Monday) and Rollins can claim a screwjob to keep the feud going. By feud of course I mean with HHH and Stephanie, who are the top villains on the show. Still.

Jericho: “WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS!”

Overall Rating: A-. I had a great time here and there wasn’t a single bad match on the show. Unfortunately, as they ALWAYS DO, Raw went on too long and started to kill some of the mood. That would be the part that wasn’t killed by Sheamus vs. Cesaro continuing for reasons far beyond the mental capabilities of normal humans. It’s a really good show but trim off a match or so (and redo the Cruiserweight stuff from the start) and it’s a much better show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Monday Night Raw – October 3, 2016: One Of Those Shows…..Maybe?

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 3, 2016
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We’ve got a packed show tonight with two big matches. First up Cruiserweight Champion TJ Perkins has the first title defense on Raw as he puts the title on the line against Brian Kendrick in a Clash of Champions rematch. In the bigger title match, we have Sasha Banks challenging Charlotte for the Raw Women’s Title in her first one on one rematch. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Roman Reigns to open the show and MY GOODNESS they’re booing him out of the building. WWE is asking for this one as Reigns just isn’t the kind of person who can go out there and talk full time. He goes into the guy line but here’s Lana to interrupt. Fans: “THANK YOU LANA!” With the accent slipping, Lana rips into Reigns for everything he’s done in recent weeks but Reigns just tells her to bring her husband out here if he wants that rematch.

Rusev comes out and the brawl is on again with the Bulgarian getting the better of it and knocking Reigns into the crowd. Rusev takes the belt and starts to walk up the ramp but Reigns sneaks up from behind him with a Superman Punch. Reigns grabs the mic and says they can have the rematch but it’s going to be inside the Cell.

We recap Brian Kendrick vs. TJ Perkins, which is over Kendrick thinking he deserves the title more than TJ. Perkins had talked about being homeless while pursuing his dream (Sidebar: allegedly this got Perkins heat because other wrestlers have done the same thing. Uh, are any of them Cruiserweight Champion and wrestling on Raw? No? Then shut up with your jealous complaining.) but Kendrick has worked harder and longer. Perkins beat him at Clash of Champions and tonight is a rematch because….well because no one knows anyone other than these two.

TJ Perkins vs. Brian Kendrick

Non-title (Wasn’t this announced as a title match last week?) and both guys are basically the hometown boys. A dropkick puts Kendrick on the floor to start and a slingshot dropkick makes it even worse. Back in and Brian boots him in the face before putting Perkins hand inside the clamp that attaches the turnbuckle to the post.

We take a break and come back with TJ hitting his double chicken wing into the gutbuster but the kneebar sends Kendrick to the ropes. A quick Sliced Bread #2 gets two on TJ and there’s the Captain’s Hook but Perkins rolls Kendrick up for two. The slingshot dropkick looks to set up the fireman’s carry enziguri, only to have Kendrick rake the eyes. Another Captain’s Hook gives Kendrick the title at 9:00.

Rating: C. Well ok. Perkins wins the whole tournament and is basically unbeatable but a single rake to the eyes is enough to beat him in less than ten minutes? The best thing here though is having a clear heel and a clear face so we can actually have a story. At the end of the day though, this is likely setting up a third match at the pay per view, despite neither match really warranting a third one.

Earlier today, Seth Rollins sat down with Michael Cole to say he’s been medically cleared. Rollins talks about gaining enemies due to being HHH’s friend. He and Kevin Owens are both hard workers but HHH handed Owens the title. No one handed the title to Rollins at Wrestlemania XXXI (which we’re still talking about) and Owens is going to be another piece in HHH’s big plans. Rollins is going to get the title back no matter what Owens or Chris Jericho have to say about it.

Braun Strowman vs. Chase Silver

Before the match, Silver says he’s in Hollywood because dreams come true here. Strowman runs him over and shouts that this is the best WWE can offer. A running shoulder sends Silver flying into the corner and the powerslam (Cole: “Hi ho Silver, away) is enough for the pin at 1:45.

Post match Strowman says WWE is wasting his talents on these weak fools week in and weak out. If he doesn’t get better competition next week, there might not be a next week. Good, as they need to advance this story and character at some point.

Bayley comes up to Sasha Banks and congratulates her for being in the main event of Raw. Sasha knows Charlotte is great but she’s destined to be champion.

Here are Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho to respond to Rollins’ comments earlier. Owens asks Jericho what he’s done to deserve a rematch because the truth is that Seth lost at Clash of Champions. Rollins has been complaining about the referee but he’s only got himself to blame.

After laughing at the fans for chanting STUPID IDIOTS (because it makes them stupid idiots), Owens suggests that Jericho should be the guest referee. Jericho suggests that he get a title shot of his own but of course he means the two of them getting the Raw Tag Team Titles. Owens isn’t sure about it because that’s a bit too much work for him so Jericho suggests a Universal Title shot. Owens: “Yeah! Let’s do it! Let’s go after New Day!”

Cue New Day to say they’re the best friends in WWE. That earns them a spot on Jericho’s list but Big E. cuts him off to say they’ll have to have a champion’s huddle. This excludes Jericho so BIG E. MAKES THE LIST. Woods laughs and you know where that lands him. Owens yells at New Day for feeding kids questionable cereal and says they jumped the shark about seven months ago. Woods: “Look at yourself. When is the last time you jumped over anything?” Owens: “PUT WOODS ON THE LIST AGAIN!” A match seems to be made for later.

Sheamus and Cesaro arrived earlier and threw each other’s bags out of the car.

Sami Zayn vs. Titus O’Neil

Titus says this is the debut of the Titus Brand. Some forearms to the back have Sami in trouble and a bearhug makes it even worse. Sami comes right back with a clothesline, the exploder suplex in the corner and the Helluva Kick for the pin at 2:48.

Sheamus and Cesaro argue over whose fault it was that they were late. Mick Foley comes in and says they’re doing this to become as amazing of a team as they can. The arguing continues.

Anderson and Gallows vs. Golden Truth

Oh yeah Golden Truth is still a thing. Earlier today, Anderson and Gallows blamed New Day for ruining the tag team division. Truth and Anderson start things off and it’s time for dancing and gyrating. Goldust comes in for a neckbreaker but it’s quickly off to Gallows with a boot to the face and a chinlock. Back up and the hot tag brings in Truth for the house cleaning, including an ax kick to Anderson. Everything breaks down and the Magic Killer puts Truth away at 3:22.

Rating: D. If this was supposed to start building Anderson and Gallows back up, it might have been a good idea to not have them get beaten up for so much of the match. Having Golden Truth out there as jobbers is fine but it’s still not exactly thrilling stuff outside of the top of the division. Of course by division I mean the three or four teams running around at the moment.

Jericho and Owens are on the way to the ring when they run into Ashton Kutcher and Danny Masterson. The List is discussed with Masterson reading off a few items: people who don’t appreciate a good scarf and superstars who lose to Fandango at Wrestlemania. Owens goes off to get ready and the celebrities say they’ll be at ringside for the match against New Day. Jericho threatens to give them……..hang on as he goes off camera to the left and comes back in on the other side to say they’ll get IT.

Jericho is the perfect example of why natural charisma is so much more important than writing. The stuff he’s doing is so stupid but he knows how to time things so well that there’s almost nothing he can’t get over. If any rookie came up with this same material, odds are they would be fired. Jericho has such natural presence though that it works like little else on the show. You can’t teach that and it’s one of the most important things in wrestling.

Enzo Amore and Big Cass are in the ring with three breast cancer survivors for the annual Susan G. Komen segment. The three women are given replica WWE Title belts.

Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens vs. New Day

Non-title. Masterson and Kutcher are on commentary as Owens runs Woods over to start. Owens makes sure to jump over Xavier in the kind of funny bit that most people just don’t think to do. Woods gets taken into the corner for the double teaming as Kutcher talks about their new show. It’s off to Big E. to face Owens for some hip swiveling.

Graves says Saxton would be the Fez (character on That 70s Show, on which Masterson and Kutcher starred) of the commentary table, which sounds like a good insult, assuming you find dating Mila Kunis’ character to be a bad thing. Big E. gets beaten down even more as the announcers discuss middle names and scarves.

Back from a break with Owens and Big E. colliding off a double clothesline. Woods comes in and gets chinlocked before it’s back to Jericho for a running clothesline in the corner. A superplex is broken up and Woods gets two off a high crossbody. Owens breaks up a hot tag attempt and gets two off a DDT.

Cue Seth Rollins to the stage for a distraction though and Woods gets in an enziguri. The hot tag brings in Big E. to clean house (and swivel the hips of course) but Owens superkicks him down. Big E. and Owens go to the floor and Jericho gets the Liontamer on Woods, only to have Rollins offer a distraction. A quick Midnight Hour puts Jericho away at 16:25.

Rating: C-. This was much longer than it needed to be and served little more purpose than to have Kutcher and Masterson there to plug their new show. It’s a really bad sign that this is what the World Champion is being used for: a second hour tag match with little to gain other than helping set up a Netflix show. Well done WWE. It’s good to see what you think of what should be your flagship star. Masterson and Kutcher were both fine and seemed to be having a lot of fun, which is much better than you’re going to get out of most guest stars.

Rollins gives Jericho a Pedigree to really get under Owens’ skin.

We look back at the opening sequence.

Charlotte says she’s the only reasons Sasha is in the main event and she’ll rise to the occasion as she always does.

Video on Rich Swann.

Stephanie McMahon comes up to yell at Rollins because he’s just as replaceable as anyone else. Rollins says getting rid of him was the second worst decision HHH has ever made. The worst: marrying Stephanie. Seth promises to burn Raw to the ground and take Owens and Jericho with him.

Rich Swann vs. Tony Nese

Nese says Swann has a dance with the best athlete in the division. Swann tries to dance early on but gets taken down with hard forearms. A bodyscissors and chinlock don’t get Nese very far as Rich pops up with some dropkicks. That’s about it for Swann though as Nese stun guns him into a sitout pumphandle powerslam for the pin at 4:13.

Rating: C-. Yeah fine. I’m assuming they’re building Nese up as the next challenger (for Perkins, whose match earlier apparently wasn’t for the title, which WWE didn’t exactly go out of their way to make clear last week) which is better than nothing. This division still has a long way to go though and this didn’t do it many favors.

Mil Mascaras video as WWE is celebrating Hispanic Heritage Month for the second month in a row.

We see a bunch of pictures of Emma in swimsuits. Coming soon: the transformation of Emma into Emmalina. I’ve heard of worse.

Cesaro/Sheamus vs. Raul White/Mark Carradine

White and Cesaro start things off with Raul being sent into the corner for alternating shots to the ribs from both guys. White’s partner comes in and walks into an Irish Curse. Sheamus loads up the Cloverleaf but Cesaro jumps over him for a DDT onto White. The Brogue Kick is good for the pin on at 1:55.

Long recap of Charlotte vs. Sasha, going all the way back to the BFF’s days in NXT. They’ve both been fighting to prove themselves as the best in the world and have traded the title over the last few months.

Charlotte and Dana Brooke are on the way to the ring when they run into Bayley. Charlotte laughs at Bayley for thinking she could be in this place someday but says she has to leave so she can go main event the show. Dana laughs at Bayley too.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Charlotte is defending and we get Big Match Intros. Sasha kicks her outside and hits a suicide dive, setting up a break less than thirty seconds in. Back with Charlotte in control and working on the back with a backbreaker (makes sense) and a hard shove into the corner. Sasha blocks the big boot and gets two off the double knees. The champ is sent outside but is still able to drop Sasha’s back onto the apron.

Sasha tries to go up top but gets knocked onto the ropes for a nasty crash. Charlotte’s superplex is shoved off and double knees from the top get two. It’s too early for the Bank Statement though so Charlotte sends her outside, setting up a CORKSCREW MOONSAULT TO THE FLOOR! I mean it made almost no contact but it looked awesome. Natural Selection gets two back inside and Charlotte is frustrated. A headscissors sets up the Bank Statement and Charlotte taps in a hurry to give Sasha the title at 14:17.

Rating: B. Good match but they felt out of sync at the end. That missed moonsault didn’t help things and the ending felt like it was out of nowhere. Sasha winning makes the most sense and, dare I say, sets up a rematch inside the Cell? They’ll have a rematch one way or another and it needs a little something more than just a regular match.

A long celebration ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. There wasn’t anything horrible about the show (meaning Stephanie was only in one segment) but I barely remember most of this show. It’s like the main event started and I couldn’t think of anything that happened in the previous two hours and forty five minutes. The show was just there for the most part as they’ve actually got time to set up the next pay per view for a change. Not a bad show but really just there, which is often worse.

Results

Brian Kendrick b. TJ Perkins – Captain’s Hook

Braun Strowman b. Chase Silver – Powerslam

Sami Zayn b. Titus O’Neil – Helluva Kick

Anderson and Gallows b. Golden Truth – Magic Killer to R-Truth

New Day b. Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho – Midnight Hour to Jericho

Tony Nese b. Rich Swann – Sitout pumphandle powerslam

Cesaro/Sheamus b. Raul White/Mark Carradine – Brogue Kick to Carradine

Sasha Banks b. Charlotte – Bank Statement

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Monday Night Raw – September 19, 2016: It’s Like A Little League Movie

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 19, 2016
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for Clash of Champions as we now go two weeks between single brand pay per views. The big stories coming into tonight seem to be Mick Foley punishing Seth Rollins for interfering in last week’s main event and the return of Rusev, who came back last week to go after Roman Reigns. Let’s get to it.

Last Week on Raw, Kevin Owens beat Reigns to retain the title despite interference by Rollins and thanks to help from Rusev.

Here’s Reigns to get things going but Stephanie McMahon cuts him off, only to have Mick Foley cut her off. Stephanie: “FOLEY! FOLEY! FOLEY!” Thank you Stephanie, though we didn’t need your input. Foley apologizes for letting things get out of hands last week and makes Rusev vs. Rollins for tonight. On the other hand, Reigns will be getting a US Title shot against Rusev on Sunday. Stephanie: “And I personally guarantee it will happen.” Reigns: “Thanks Stephanie. That means so much coming from you.” I might have applauded that line.

Foley goes into a discussion of Raw vs. Smackdown and says he’s out of a job if they lose the ratings war. That means Kevin Owens vs. Reigns again tonight. This brings out Owens to say he should be getting ready for the title match on Sunday. Stephanie says tonight is non-title but Foley makes it a cage match.

After a break, Stephanie and Foley are in the back when Rusev comes up to plug Lana’s movie (Interrogation, with Edge) and Holy Foley. Rusev leaves and Foley gets a call from Chris Jericho.

Rusev vs. Seth Rollins

Non-title. Rusev starts in with his variety of kicks but gets dropkicked out to the floor for his efforts. Rollins is sent back first into the post and a hard whip sends him back first into the buckle for good measure. Some right hands stagger Rusev as Rollins looks so at home as a face. Unfortunately he’s not quite at home on the top as Rusev slams him down with one arm to take us to a break.

Back with Seth fighting out of a waistlock and hitting a quick enziguri for a breather. There’s the Sling Blade to keep Rusev in trouble and Rollins muscles him over for a Falcon Arrow. Rusev comes right back with a superkick to the shoulder (even Cole acknowledges how off it was) for two of his own. Seth gets in the springboard knee and a suicide dive. They fight up the aisle and that’s a double countout at 11:52.

Rating: C+. Oh sweet goodness is Rollins perfect as a face. His size makes him as natural of a good guy as you can get and I still don’t know why they brought him back as a heel other than to make sure Reigns stayed a face. Well, as much of a face as Reigns ca be in the fans’ eyes.

Post match they fight over to the announcers’ table where Seth escapes a powerbomb and dives off the table to take Rusev out.

Dana Brooke yells at Foley about last week’s double pin. The solution: ANOTHER FREAKING TRIPLE THREAT MATCH. Can you imagine if there were this many last man standing matches or cage matches? Almost every story has to wind up as a triple threat at some point and it’s getting really, really tiresome.

Videos on Cedric Alexander and Brian Kendrick, both of whom are debuting as cruiserweights tonight.

Owens and Jericho have a list of grievances for Foley.

Braun Strowman vs. Sin Cara

Rematch from two weeks ago. Cara fires away right hands and kicks to start until Strowman just runs him over like a monster. We hit an early neck crank for a bit before Cara tries to speed things up, only to have his moonsault caught in a powerslam for the pin at 1:54. What in the world was the point of the countout a few weeks ago?

Bayley and Sasha Banks are ready to team together tonight but they’ll fight on Sunday.

Charlotte/Dana Brooke vs. Bayley/Sasha Banks

Sasha rolls Dana up to start before it’s off to Bayley, who sends Charlotte into the buckle and us to a break. Back with Bayley in trouble as the heels take turns cranking on her arms. Bayley gets in a back elbow and middle rope armdrag, allowing the tag to Sasha for a double suplex. Charlotte is smart enough to go after the huge tape around Sasha’s ribs. It’s back to Dana to send Sasha face first into the mat a few times. A headscissors puts Charlotte down and the real hot tag brings in Bayley. Dana saves the Bayley to Belly though and it’s a big boot from Charlotte for the pin on Bayley at 11:09.

Rating: C. Perfectly acceptable formula tag match here with the rib injury giving it an easy story and Charlotte getting some momentum heading into the title match after losing for weeks leading into the title defense. It’s always fun to see the women having the same kind of match you would expect from the men with the only exception being their genders. The lack of PUPPIES chants probably helps a lot too.

Seth goes into Stephanie’s office. After a break, Rollins asks Stephanie why she threw him away for Owens. Stephanie says she had nothing to do with HHH (and since she’s apparently not asked her husband about this once) but it was Seth who allowed the title to go to her brother’s show. Maybe HHH was tired of Seth ruining HHH’s reputation (which has a street value of about $14). Seth is going to prove that the Authority put their money on the wrong horse. Stephanie gets all serious (of course) and orders him to not threaten her.

Bo Dallas vs. Gary Graham

Bo does more serious poetry about how only he can believe in himself. It’s another quick beatdown with knees and right hands as the fans chant for the jobber. The Roll of the Dice ends Graham at 1:18.

Video on the Cruiserweight Classic final.

Cesaro vs. Sheamus

Match six in the best of seven series with Cesaro down 3-2 and let’s get this over with. They slug it out to start and Cesaro flips out of an early backdrop attempt. Sheamus sends him outside and we take a break. Back with Cesaro hitting the uppercut train to knock Sheamus over the barricade and next to some Memphis Grizzlies’ feet.

Cesaro can’t do the apron superplex though and gets caught in White Noise onto the apron. The Brogue Kick misses but Cesaro walks into the Irish Curse for two. Sheamus grabs the Cloverleaf but gets small packaged for two. A rollup with feet on the ropes gets the same on Cesaro before he ducks the Brogue Kick and Neutralizes Sheamus for the pin at 9:40.

Rating: C-. The same problems that have plagued this stupid series for a month are still around here and I won’t bother going over them again. This would have been a lot better if the last three or four matches had a gimmick or something but the fact that we’re heading to a seventh match and nothing has changed really isn’t interesting.

Foley makes the seventh match for Clash of Champions when Jericho comes in. Jericho accuses him of never being a fan but Foley brings up recommending him to Paul Heyman for ECW. Chris has his List of Jericho (list of grievances), which now includes a bad fashion sense. As you might expect, Foley brings up the scarf look. Jericho: “This is very big in Luxemburg.” Foley: “Well it looks ridiculous, right here, in Memphis, Tennessee.” Jericho: “Number six: Uses cheap babyface pops.”

It’s time for Jericho’s list of grievances. First up: Foley is trying to drive a wedge between Jericho and Owens. A fan yells at him so Jericho adds “brace face in row twelve”. We get to the Sami Zayn phone attack last week but here are Enzo and Cass to interrupt. Cass lists off some great friendships, including Bevis and Butthead and Ashton Kutcher and Danny Masterson.

Cue the Shining Stars to offer some time shares. This brings out the New Day with Kofi saying they have a very good reason to be out here. Big E.: “We have nothing better to do.” Woods promises to keep the titles on Sunday so here are Anderson and Gallows to interrupt. Jericho says everyone in the ring is on his stupid idiot list but here’s Sami because we need a tenth guy for the huge tag match.

Shining Stars/Chris Jericho/Anderson and Gallows vs. Enzo and Cass/Sami Zayn/New Day

We start after a break with Kofi spinning into a crossbody for two on Jericho. It’s off to Sami vs. Epico before Big E. comes in for his spanking abdominal stretch. Anderson comes in and catches Kofi with a spinebuster as the bad guys take over. That lasts all of thirty seconds before the hot tag brings in Big Cass to clean house. The Empire Elbow gets two on Primo as everything breaks down. Sami runs the corner for his tornado DDT and there’s a Helluva Kick to Primo. The Bada Boom Shaka Lacka is enough for the pin on Primo at 5:24.

Rating: D+. This is as simple of a way as you’re going to find to do three matches in one on a show where Stephanie needs ten segments. I’m assuming Enzo and Cass get their win back on Sunday’s pre-show and that’s fine enough of a way to end such a nothing feud. Enzo and Cass have to fight New Day sometime and they’d be fine to take the belts away, especially since New Day is less than three months away from Demolition’s record.

We recap the opening segment.

Videos on Gran Metalik and Rich Swann.

Video on Eddie Guerrero in honor of Hispanic Heritage Month.

Here’s Foley to introduce the cruiserweights. After screwing up a few of his lines, Foley talks about the Cruiserweight Classic and introduces Rich Swann, Gran Metalik, Cedric Alexander and Brian Kendrick. Foley makes the first match: a fatal fourway for the shot at TJ Perkins’ Cruiserweight Title on Sunday.

Rich Swann vs. Gran Metalik vs. Cedric Alexander vs. Brian Kendrick

One fall to a finish. It’s a brawl to start since there are no tags, eventually leaving us with Kendrick and Alexander. Brian bails to the floor but gets kicked in the face so Alexander sunset flips Metalik for two. A springboard clothesline gets two more on Metalik but Swann comes back in to kick Cedric in the back.

Swann and Alexander trade strikes and miss kicks until Cedric flips out of a headscissors. A big flip dive takes Kendrick down and it’s only Metalik in the ring. You know what that means as Metalik dives onto everyone, finally drawing a reaction from the crowd. Kendrick breaks up Metalik’s springboard and throws Swann and Alexander into various objects. A few kicks to Swann’s leg take us to a break.

Back with Alexander breaking up Swann’s cover on Metalik but Kendrick grabs a tornado DDT for two of his own on Metalik. Swann’s jumping 450 looks to finish Alexander but Kendrick grabs his Captain’s Hook (bully choke) on Cedric, only to have Metalik make the save. A Lumbar Check drops Metalik and the Captain’s Hook makes Alexander tap and sends Kendrick to the title shot at 15:04.

Rating: C-. Blame it on whomever you want but this fell apart because of the time. This should have been about people flying all over the place and keeping things moving. You know, like a cruiserweight match. Instead it was your run of the mill WWE multi-man match with WAY too much time and the fans just dying throughout. The guys ran out of things to do and then had six or seven minutes to go. Horrible booking decision here and odds are it’s more of the same bickering between Kevin Dunn and HHH’s camps with Kevin trying to shoot down whatever HHH sets up. Oh and the new champ doesn’t even get a cameo? Really?

Nia Jax vs. Alicia Fox on the pre-show.

Kevin Owens vs. Roman Reigns

Non-title and inside a cage. Reigns slugs away to start but wants nothing of going through the door. The champ gets beaten down in the corner and a running clothesline makes it even worse. A ram into the cage wall sets up a superkick for two on Roman and we take a break. Back with Owens getting crotched on the top and getting crushed up against the cage a few times.

Reigns’ clotheslines have Owens in trouble but he has to Superman punch his way out of a Pop Up Powerbomb. The second attempt at the powerbomb gets two for Owens and they go to the top rope for some rams into the cage. Both guys are down and Reigns sprints up the cage to get outside before Owens can go through the door for the win at 13:17.

Rating: D+. Not only was it boring and not only was there no reason for this to be a cage match but Reigns winning makes Owens’ big problem even worse: he feels like someone who is just there while Stephanie has her issues with Foley/Rollins/Smackdown or whatever disease she’s so passionate about that week. This should have been Rusev coming out and costing Reigns the match and then doing the beatdown that we all know is coming. But no, instead Reigns is the big star and Owens is just another loser.

Post match, Rusev comes out and locks the door so he can put Reigns in the Accolade. You know, because THERE’S NO WAY REIGNS COULD EVER GET OVER A CAGE WALL. Rollins comes out and does the big dive off the top (reminiscent of Rey Mysterio in the early days of the first Brand Split), not even bothering to look at the door because THERE ISN’T A ROOF ON THE CAGE. Everyone is down to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. It’s just too long and I don’t know how many other ways there are to say that. Whether it’s seeing Sheamus vs. Cesaro week after week after week or the cruiserweights’ debut being one of the biggest messes I’ve seen in a long time or even more Stephanie and Foley hijinks, these shows feel like they’re going on for days instead of three hours. These shows are too long and the matches and promos having to be stretched out to fill in the time shows worse every week.

Then there’s the main feud as it feels like Stephanie’s latest promo about her power struggle (which DOESN’T EXIST) should end Sunday’s show instead of Owens vs. Rollins. It’s like watching some kids movie about rival Little League teams where the parents are more into the fighting than the adults and that’s getting really, really annoying.

Just let HHH come back and do the match with Rollins at Survivor Series like they should, rather than stretching this ALL THE WAY TO FREAKING WRESTLEMANIA BECAUSE HHH IS WORTHY OF THE BIG STAGE. That main event and these stupid angles ticked me off tonight like they haven’t in a long, long time and that’s not good for any show, especially when they’re heading into a pay per view.

Results

Rusev vs. Seth Rollins went to a double countout

Braun Strowman b. Sin Cara – Powerslam

Charlotte/Dana Brooke b. Bayley/Sasha Banks – Big boot to Bayley

Cesaro b. Sheamus – Neutralizer

New Day/Enzo and Big Cass/Sami Zayn b. Shining Stars/Chris Jericho/Anderson and Gallows – Bada Boom Shaka Lacka to Primo

Brian Kendrick b. Gran Metalik, Rich Swann and Cedric Alexander – Captain’s Hook to Alexander

Roman Reigns b. Kevin Owens – Reign escaped the cage

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01LY6766K#nav-subnav


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6