NXT – November 30, 2011 – The Derrick Bateman Show

NXT
Date: November 30, 2011
Location: Time Warner Cable Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Matt Striker

Time for another week of this. We’re almost in December of a show that started in early March. We’re also approaching the wedding of Maxine and Bateman, which I think is scheduled for late January. This show really is going to last an entire year isn’t it? I was kidding when I suggested that at first. I guess we’re supposed to ignore that all three guys have appeared on Smackdown in the past few weeks right? Let’s get to it.

The song saying that they have just begun scares me.

No Regal this week???

The main event is a triple threat with the rookies and the winner gets a match on Smackdown.

Tyler Reks vs. Percy Watson

Watson has an annoying spoken part before his song now. I’m sorry but he really isn’t on the level that he deserves that yet. Hawkins sits in on commentary. Fast paced start with Watson flying around the place but he walks into a Downward Spiral into the middle buckle for two. Striker says that the money here is way better in the NFL. If my math is right, the minimum salary in the NFL is about a quarter million dollars a year. Methinks Matt is lying.

Watson starts his comeback and hammers away. The fans actually seem to care for him here as a cross body gets two. Hawkins gets up and plays ugly cheerleader, allowing Reks to get in a shot to break the momentum again. Reks goes up for what appears to be a double axe off the top but jumps into a dropkick for the pin at 3:20.

Rating: C-. Just a match here for the most part. It wasn’t bad or anything but it’s kind of hard to get interested in a match like this where there’s no reason at all to see them fight. They’re not fighting for anything but pride so it doesn’t really add up to anything. Watson is fun to watch when he jumps though.

Curtis is hitting on Kaitlyn when Maxine comes up. He has good taste. Kaitlyn is invited back to his bus which Maxine says doesn’t exist. Kaitlyn leaves and Maxine yells because that’s insulting to her to go from Maxine to someone like Kaitlyn. Maxine talks to Curtis and they’re about to kiss but he kisses his fingers and puts them to her lips. She isn’t happy. He leaves and Bateman comes up so she kisses him hard…..with his mother next to him. Bateman leaves and Mama Bateman threatens her with violence if she hurts Bateman.

Yoshi Tatsu/Trent Barretta vs. Tyson Kidd/Johnny Curtis

We get a High Fliers reference from Striker, who swears some people know who he’s talking about. Tatsu vs. Curtis gets us going and there isn’t much going on so they both tag out. Trent winds up in the corner as the announcers aren’t all that interested in the match. Kidd gets two off a kick to the head and hooks in a chinlock. They go up to the corner and Trent mostly misses what we would kind of call a Whisper in the Wind. That sets up the hot tag to Tatsu who beats up ever heel in sight. He tries to fire up the crowd and it doesn’t work at all. The top rope spinwheel kick misses and Curtis hits a sitout brainbuster for the pin at 4:30.

Rating: D. Just dull again here as Curtis is as uninteresting of a guy as I’ve seen in years. A sitout brainbuster isn’t an interesting move at all and that fits perfectly. At least with the diving legdrop it looked ok. Nothing to see here and for the life of me I don’t get why he keeps a job, especially with some of the other people they could put on this show.

We get the entire Piper’s Pit from Monday. It still doesn’t quite work as the fans didn’t boo Cena. It eats up about 10 minutes though which is ten minutes of NXT stuff I don’t have to watch.

Maxine vs. Alicia Fox

Matthews asks Striker to compare the offensive styles here….and somehow he does it. For the life of me I don’t get why the Divas are on TV all the time. Alicia uses a lot of moves involving her flexibility which get her nowhere. Bateman and Mama Bateman come out to watch. Maxine sees them and panics a bit, allowing Alicia to hit the Axe Kick for the win at 2:24.

Derrick Bateman vs. Titus O’Neil vs. Darren Young

Young waits on the floor as Titus beats Bateman up. He slides in and chops away (WOO) so Titus pounds him down also. Young continues his Flair impersonation and is slammed off the top for two. After a break for a bad Cena movie, the heels are double teaming Titus. As is custom, they get in a fight of their own, allowing Titus to fight back. Young hits a clothesline for two on O’Neil.

The heels fight a bit more and I’m trying to care. I mean I really am trying, but it’s just not going to happen at all. Bateman goes up and gets crotched and it’s a TOWER OF DOOM!!! They actually call it that and it’s a wicked one too. Titus can’t get the pin on Young so he grabs the rope like Batista and yells a lot. Young and O’Neil fight to the apron and Young takes him down with a neckbreaker. Bateman grabs O’Neil as he comes back in for the pin at 8:49.

Rating: C-. Pretty dull stuff here and my goodness why would it be Bateman? I mean, it couldn’t be clearer that O’Neil is the class of this group but instead their answer is try to make it seem like a competition. I don’t know who thinks this is interesting to watch, but it’s really not working at all. Boring match to end a boring show.

Post match Bateman wants Maxine to come out but he gets JTG and Tamina instead. They say she left with Curtis. Oh joy.

Overall Rating: D. It was an hour long and it was the Derrick Bateman Show tonight. I have no idea why they’re choosing to push him but that’s all they seem to think is the right idea. Titus is a guy that could be an interesting character on one of the big shows but it just isn’t happening here. Bad show.

Results
Percy Watson b. Tyler Reks – Dropkick
Tyson Kidd/Johnny Curtis b. Yoshi Tatsu/Trent Barretta – Sitout Brainbuster to Tatsu
Alicia Fox b. Maxine – Axe Kick
Derrick Bateman b. Titus O’Neil and Darren Young – Pinned O’Neil after a neckbreaker from Young

 

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NXT – November 23, 2011 – Same Old Stuff Here

NXT
Date: November 23, 2011
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Matt Striker, William Regal

It’s the Thanksgiving week show and the show is somehow back up to three finalists. Only this show could go from two finalists to three to two to three again and take a few months to do so. This is the 38th episode of the season, putting this on the verge of being as long as the first three seasons combined. I thought just the third was ridiculous but this passed that long ago. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Young to open the show with I believe new music. We get a clip of Young beating up O’Neil and his finisher is called the Gut Check. It’s the fireman’s carry into a double knee to the ribs. Young says this is his show and wants to know where the people were last week when he beat O’Neil down. Is there a difference between being beaten up and being beaten down? He says his usual stuff about how he’s done a ton of stuff and how O’Neil hasn’t done anything.

Cue Reks and Hawkins of all people who say that the only thing Young accomplished was jumping Titus, which they’ve done a bunch of times. They’re impressed with Young and say they’re very similar. They think he has the It Factor but here are O’Neil and Watson. They make fun of Reks’ lack of charisma and cut Young off. Titus talks about getting eliminated a year ago in this town but he’s back to show his agenda. There’s the brawl but Striker makes O’Neil/Watson vs. Reks/Young.

Yoshi Tatsu vs. Johnny Curtis

Bateman and Maxine are on commentary for no apparent reason. We talk about the wedding and then realize that’s stupid so we talk about Johnny Curtis. That makes it stupider so let’s talk about the wedding again. Regal offers to explain the misery of being married, since he’s been married 16 times. Regal talks about Bateman’s mother in law and implies sex. He even admits they’re ignoring the match. Can’t fault him for lying.

Curtis goes to the apron for a slingshot legdrop and shakes his hips at Maxine. Regal: “I think that was for me. At my age you have to take what you can get.” Suplex gets two for Curtis. Bateman makes another joke about Curtis and Maxine dating so they walk off. The wedding is in eight weeks, which I guess means we’ll be here until January. Yoshi fires off the chops and a spinwheel kick puts Johnny down. The top rope spinwheel kick ends this at 4:35.

Rating: C. This was fine. Yoshi is a solid hand while Curtis….well he’s Johnny Curtis. That should summarize this match as well as I can put it together. Not much to see here but it advances Bateman vs. Curtis I guess because we need to see it right? Not much to see here but Yoshi’s stuff is always fun to see.

Bateman goes to the ring post match but doesn’t attack Curtis.

Maxine and Bateman argue more in the back about what Curtis did during the date. She cancels sex until future notice. Curtis comes in and implies Maxine wants him.

Here are the Usos who do their dance before their promo. Jimmy talks about being nervous every time they come out here. They represent every Samoan ever in wrestling history. Jey talks about people like Yokozuna, the Wild Samoans, Umaga (didn’t expect to hear that name) and Rikishi. They talk about how Uso means brother but saying Us (pronounced Oos) can mean friend, close person, etc. They start a call and response chant with the audience of we say Us, you say O, which gets a surprisingly strong response. The fans like these guys.

This brings out JTG and Tamina, who says this isn’t about heritage because she’s an independent woman. Let’s have a match.

JTG vs. Jimmy Uso

Jimmy knocks him to the floor quickly so he can glare at Tamina a bit. Off to a chinlock by JTG as we list off the huge Samoan family tree. Stinger style splash in the corner hits JTG and there’s the running him smash in the corner, which is credited to Rikishi but it’s an Umaga move I believe. A superkick and frog splash are enough for the pin at 3:50.

Rating: C-. Why are the Usos on NXT? The fans like them, they’re decent in the ring, they have a gimmick, and they’re on NXT. I have no idea what the thought of this company is about them, but they’re more than good enough to be something on one of the main shows, but they’re not getting that at all here. It’s WWE I guess.

Percy Watson/Titus O’Neil vs. Darren Young/Tyler Reks

Young vs. Watson gets us going. My goodness what a difference a gimmick change makes for Watson. O’Neil comes in and Young runs. He’s now the Big Deal Titus O’Neil. Reks talks trash so Titus hammers him in the face. This goes on for awhile until Watson comes in and cleans house. The heels go to the floor so Percy dives onto them as we take a break. Back with Titus getting two on Reks off a move we don’t see.

Back to Watson who doesn’t do as well. We talk about Bateman getting a Smackdown contract and we hear about how this season is about getting to one of the main shows. So at least there’s no talk of season 6. Regal talks about WWE 12. “I HAVE ABS!!!” Young hooks a chinlock on Watson to eat up some time. Gordbuster gets two for Reks. There’s your double tag to Young and O’Neil but Hawkins throws in the cane, so that the Gut Check can end Titus at 11:00.

Rating: D+. Boring main event here with neither team being interesting in being out there it seems. We have a heel team now I guess which is fine, but I’ll spare you the drill here on “but where is this going”. We’ve been past that for a very long time and there’s no point in saying it all the time. Too long of a main event though.

Overall Rating: D+. Pretty ho-hum stuff tonight with not much going on of note. This was more of a show about advancing the existing storylines rather than adding anything new to the mix. In other words, if you liked the rest of the storylines, you’ll like this. Nothing to see here for the most part though and it wasn’t much of a show.

Results
Yoshi Tatsu b. Johnny Curtis – Top Rope Spinwheel Kick
Jimmy Uso b. JTG – Frog Splash
Darren Young/Tyler Reks b. Percy Watson/Tyler Reks – Gut Check to O’Neil

 

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NXT – November 16, 2011 – Darren Freaking Young Is Back

NXT
Date: November 15, 2011
Location: Webster Bank Arena, Bridgeport, Connecticut
Commentators: William Regal, Jack Korpela

We’re back in America for this week and we’re rapidly approaching the time needed to have a full pregnancy with this season. There’s still no talk of eliminating anyone or anything like that and I’m sure we’re leading up to a wedding or some jazz like that. Also we’ll have more Johnny Curtis matches to suck the life out of all that is good and pure in the world. Let’s get to it.

The opening video includes Young in the list of finalists. Oh give me a break.

Watson and O’Neil are in the ring to start the show. Waton introduces O’Neil and Titus barks. There are leather chairs in the ring so this looks like a talk show segment. Titus says this show has been long with people coming and going. However he’s been one of the constants and after being eliminated last year, he’s following the light to being the next WWE Breakout Star.

Cue Tyler Reks and Curt Hawkins who I guess are back together again. Reks thinks Titus has been here two months. This season has been going on for 9 months now so I guess math isn’t Reks’ strong suit. Hawkins says O’Neil has no heart. O’Neil gets fired up and says he’s earned his way here (I’d ask for a refund) and he isn’t going to listen to these guys talk down to him.

This brings out Bateman. “Worst show ever!” PREACH IT BROTHER!!! O’Neil and Watson make fun of Bateman and Maxine with fish noises included. Now we get fish jokes and a brawl breaks out. Striker says calm down and makes Reks vs. O’Neil for the main event. Bateman vs….someone but he won’t turn around to listen to Striker. It’s Bateman vs. Watson.

Percy Watson vs. Derrick Bateman

O’Neil sits in on commentary here. Watson controls to start and pounds on Bateman which doesn’t mean much. Derrick is sent to the floor as Regal talks about Maxine being able to yodel with a dinner plate in her mouth. You can’t say Regal is boring. Percy asks Regal to coach them but he says they don’t have enough of a mean streak. Bateman and Titus yell at each other and Watson makes his comeback. Spinning splash gets two. Persecution (the fireman’s carry into a pancake) ends this at 4:14.

Rating: D+. This was just a step above a squash and really was more of a live workout for Watson. I have no idea what the company sees in Bateman but it’s not his in ring abilities. The guy is so average and bland and would never stand out in a crowd at all and I think I just answered my own question.

Maxine is flipping through a wedding magazine and Johnny Curtis comes up to hit on her. He wants things to be like they used to be and puts his hand under her chin like he’s going to kiss her. She moves it away and says she invented this game. Maxine had no idea Bateman had a match. She says she doesn’t need his help and slaps him. So are they engaged now too?

Yoshi Tatsu vs. JTG

JTG has Tamina with him again. The crowd is SILENT when the bell rings. The announcers talk about England to try to avoid the match. A neckbreaker gets two for JTG and it’s off to the exact same half nelson that Bateman used earlier. Is that a required move to use anymore? Regal talks about meeting the French inventor of the sandal: Fillipe Fillop. That’s how boring this match is: that line was amusing by comparison. Yoshi starts his comeback but Tamina distracts him. JTG throws him into the post and a rollup ends this at 4:08.

Rating: D. So now we’re pushing JTG. I think we’ve officially run out of ideas here. Tamina and JTG are the newest heel couple or whatever and I know I’ve said this time after time, but at what point does this end at? What is the point of having anything happen on this show because there aren’t any titles to fight for and the “pros” are here just because no one else wants them. Let’s just get this over with.

Raw Rebound eats up some time by showing the end of Raw for about ten minutes. The Rock schilling Twitter is still annoying.

The Usos run into JTG/Tamina and the twins are left standing there with nothing being said. JTG and Tamina keep walking and run into Bateman who is looking for Maxine. We stay on Bateman who runs into Curtis and asks where she is. Maxine pops up and they get in an argument over where she was during his match. I have no idea what the point of this is. Bateman gets on the phone and calls for Teddy Long. Ok then.

Titus O’Neil vs. Tyler Reks

Power battle to start as Titus hammers him down to take over. They head to the floor and Hawkins gets involved. He also gets punched down by Watson, making both of them get ejected. After a break we’re back with Tyler in control due to ramming O’Neil into the railing during the break. Reks hammers on him more with really basic stuff. This is a boring match so far. Off to that same quarter/half nelson which we’ve seen in both matches so far. Titus hits a backdrop to put Tyler down and hammers away. Clash of the Titus and we’re done at 7:20. It was as abrupt as it sounded.

Rating: D-. No. One. Cares. I mean no one cares at all. Why is this supposed to be an interesting main event? Reks hasn’t been around in almost a month and now he’s still around doing the whole “it’s my show” thing? Horrible dull match which is a perfect way to end a horribly dull show. Also the ending was identical to the one that Crimson beat Pope with on Impact. I mean the EXACT same thing.

Post match…..oh you have got to be kidding me. DARREN FREAKING YOUNG is back to beat down Titus.

Overall Rating: F. This show SUCKED. JTG is getting a singles push and the main event is the same thing we’ve seen a dozen times now. The ten minutes of Rock vs. Cena is annoying on top of that as it’s just more I have to fast forward through because I watched it two days ago. On top of that, Darren Young is back. WHY DOES HE HAVE A JOB??? This was one of the worst shows they’ve had in a very long time.

Results

Percy Watson b. Derrick Bateman – Persecution
JTG b. Yoshi Tatsu – Rollup
Titus O’Neil b. Tyler Reks – Clash of the Titus

 

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NXT – November 9, 2011 – I’ve Seen Graveyards More Alive Than This Crowd

NXT
Date: November 9, 2011
Location: Liverpool Echo Arena, Liverpool, England
Commentators: Jack Korpela, Matt Striker

We’re in England this week so expect a few Regal chants. I’ve actually lost count of the number of weeks we’ve had now and frankly I don’t care. This is going to hit a year I believe and I wouldn’t be surprised if it did. Darren Young is eligible for his return now and I hope they release him before he makes said return. It’s not like he offers anything to the company anyway. Let’s get to it.

Striker is in the ring with Bateman, Watson, O’Neil and Maxine. He says two of the rookie finalists which implies there may be more, which scares me to death. Bateman says Maxine is beautiful and they make out. O’Neil makes fish jokes and for the love of goodness, EXPLAIN WHAT IT MEANS. I know the joke, but if you’re going to say it over and over again you may want to point that out more than once.

Striker says he’s been keeping an eye on the rookies and judging them. This brings out Johnny Curtis of all people. He says the show sucks anymore and Titus wants to fight him. It’s implied and confirmed that Curtis and Maxine went out before. The main event of Watson/O’Neil vs. Bateman/Curtis is made. Oh joy.

There’s an article on WWE.com on why Rock and Cena could make a good tag team. That needs an whole article? IT’S ROCK AND CENA!

Wait why isn’t Regal on commentary? Hopefully he’s wrestling on a Raw house show.

Tyson Kidd vs. Trent Barretta

I’d be perfectly fine with Barretta getting more TV time on this show. They go to the mat quickly and Matt says Kidd is complaining about being bastardized by the WWE. Striker makes fun of Maxine for being a less than scrupulous and is having a good time on commentary. We hear a voice I don’t think we’re supposed to hear as this match isn’t all that interesting. It’s fine but I have no reason to care about these guys.

Tyson works the arm as Striker gives us a brief history of the Hart Dungeon. The announcers get into a debate about recording stuff on tape/Betamax etc and Jack says you watch NXT on WWE.com. Without missing a beat, Striker: “Who does that?” I love lines like that. They’ve been on the mat for the most part until a Trent clothesline puts Tyson on the floor.

Trent is launched into the post and we take a break. Back with them in the ring and Tyson holding a dragon sleeper. Off to a chinlock as the announcers mainly ignore the match. At least with this it’s a nothing match and they’re not talking about any individual thing. Jack asks if the challenges and point stuff is still going on and Matt says it’s a week to week thing. Trent takes over with a top rope cross body for two. A shot in the corner gets the same.

He tries a tornado DDT but Tyson hits a SWEET spin kick to take over. Brainbuster gets two. Back to the floor and Trent avoids a charge into the barricade. Barretta busts out a Whisper in the Wind off said barricade and both guys are down. Back in there’s a slingshot elbow for two. They go to the corner but Kidd manages to drop Trent on his head/neck as Trent tries a top rope rana and a one leg Liontamer ends this at 11:23.

Rating: B-. Good match here with both guys getting time to make things work. I really like Barretta and would love to see him get more time. The guy puts on decent matches every time he’s out there and this was no exception. I’d love to see an NXT Title and let guys do things like this every week on it. That Whisper in the Wind was pretty awesome. Check this match out if you have about 12 minutes to kill. It’s pretty good.

Bateman is yelling about Maxine dating Curtis. Curtis comes up and implies Maxine is bad in bed.

JTG hits on Tamina when the Usos come up to tell him to get lost. She doesn’t like them interfering so they say Santino is better than JTG. She’s going to be in JTG’s corner tonight.

Jimmy Uso vs. JTG

Jimmy doesn’t get an entrance so we don’t get the dance thing that I can’t spell. Jimmy controls to start so JTG makes fun of the war dance. Uso means brother in Samoan. That name makes much more sense now. The match is nothing special so far. Jimmy goes up but Tamina distracts him so JTG hits a dropkick, sending him to the floor. JTG hits a faceplant out of the corner for two as we talk about Survivor Series.

Matt asks Jack for his picks for Survivor Series and Jack has NOTHING. Matt even makes fun of him for it and it’s actually a bit embarrassing. Then again so is JTG and he keeps his job. Let’s keep the camera on Tamina for about 10 seconds now. It’s clear neither guy has anything to talk about as Jimmy takes over. The top rope splash ends this at 5:22.

Rating: C-. So? I’ll spare you the rant about how this show is so boring and all that jazz, but this was boring as usual. JTG is a guy that isn’t intimidating as a heel at all. He’s supposed to be a fun character and I don’t get the point in making him a heel for so long. It’s not like his status means anything. Weak match with a pointless angle tacked on.

Percy Watson/Titus O’Neil vs. Derrick Bateman/Johnny Curtis

My stars what a dull heel team. We’ve got like 6 minutes left in this show so we’re not going to have much here. Watson starts with Bateman and speeds things up quickly. Off to Curtis who doesn’t do much better. Off to O’Neil and I’ve seen funeral processions more excited than this crowd. Bateman sends Percy’s back into the post to take over. We talk about Curtis being an orphan to fill in air time. La Parka of all people is referenced by Striker. Jack: “No one knows who you’re talking about.” There’s the double tag and even Titus can’t wake the crowd up. Clash of the Titus is broken up and a High/Low ends Titus at 4:40.

Rating: D. This was horribly uninteresting. They did their thing but a lot of the problems were due to the lack of time. Well that and Curtis being the least interesting guy I can remember in a very long time. Nothing to see here and the show itself as a whole was the same. Wow this was bad.

Overall Rating: D+. The opener was good but the rest was just DULL. I haven’t heard a crowd this dead since the last time I was in a cemetery. Totally boring show and I don’t know if it was them being tired from the flight or what, but this was as bad as this show has been (save for the good opener) in a long time. Either end the show or get it back to America IMMEDIATELY.

Results
Tyson Kidd b. Trent Barretta – One Leg Boston Crab
Jimmy Uso b. JTG – Top Rope Splash
Johnny Curtis/Derrick Bateman b. Titus O’Neil/Percy Watson – High/Low to O’Neil

 

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NXT – November 2, 2011 – Walking Around In Circles

NXT
Date: November 2, 2011
Location: BI-LO Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: William Regal, Jack Korpela

We’re approaching a full term pregnancy here as we’re in I think week 35 or so. Darren Young can come back from suspension next week but I don’t think he’ll be returning. The show seems like it’s trying to come back to the way things used to be but it’s really not working. It was a lot better when there were random matches going on instead of ones like there used to be. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about the proposal and acceptance from last week with Bateman and Maxine. It’s as stupid as it sounds, complete with a bad love song playing in the background.

Here’s JTG to open the show. He brings out Bateman and Maxine, who wears a lot of REALLY not-PG outfits. Maxine insists the name is BetaMax. I give up. Bateman says he wants to do this right, so he drops to his knee and gives her a ring which is “what 38 weeks of being an NXT Rookie can buy.” He hasn’t been here 38 weeks but whatever.

This brings out Watson, O’Neil and AJ. They really do look good in the suits. Maxine is fishless, whatever that means. Now we’re talking about Fraggle Rock. No one gets the joke, myself included. Bateman sends them away because this is an engagement party and they’re not invited. The girls get into a “you’re uglier than me” contest so O’Neil implies that Maxine’s father is here to make this formal. Titus pulls out a fish. Regal: “He’s doing that just for the halibut.” There are a ton of fish jokes and that’s the best of them all. Titus starts singing Under the Sea when Striker comes out and makes the six man tag main event.

Usos vs. Tyson Kidd/Johnny Curtis

Hawkins is suspended so Curtis is back on NXT as the sub. The winners of those shows can’t catch a break. Kidd vs. let’s say Jey starts us off. The twins take over on Kidd and Jimmy gets two off an elbow. Jey gets the same off a chop. No Curtis in yet, meaning the collective snoring hasn’t started. Oh there he is. For the life of me I don’t get what they saw in him. He’s so bland and cookie-cutter looking I don’t know how he could get more uninteresting.

Back to Kidd as apparently Curtis isn’t even going to grace us with his presence. Thank goodness for that. If I sound a bit incoherent here, you can blame the slight cold I have or Curtis’ ability to suck all the charisma out of a match. The Usos go up but heel double teaming takes them right back down. We take a break and come back with Curtis working on Jey’s knee which may have been hurt coming off the top.

Kidd comes in again as I guess even Curtis is bored by his own work. Back to Boring Man who hits a slingshot legdrop to Jey’s knee. Here’s a leg lock as this match has somehow only been going about 7 minutes including the break. Jey finally sends Kidd to the floor as as we talk about Killer Kowalski. There’s the tag and everything breaks down. The Usos head to the floor where they launch Kidd into the barricade in a cool looking move. Back inside a Samoan Drop followed by a Superfly Splash ends Curtis at 8:47.

Rating: C-. The tag matches here used to be good but I guess they’re just getting boring to me now. The Curtis factor didn’t help things out here either. The problem at the end of the day is the that the Usos are flat out better than any other team and we can only see these guys fight for the sake of fighting so many times before it loses all meaning. I think we hit that six weeks ago.

Raw ReBound. The Sheamus/Beaker thing still makes me smile. There are some deleted scenes in this.

Kaitlyn and AJ chat about the wedding. Can we just look at Kaitlyn for 50 minutes instead?

Kaitlyn vs. Tamina

Rematch from last week, which isn’t nearly as competitive was Korpela wants you to think it was. Regal makes jokes about having an affair with a dwarf. I don’t have any idea what it has to do with this match but it’s funny. Kaitlyn gets more offense in the first 30 seconds than she had all last week. Korpela calls Tamina’s dad (Jimmy Snuka) a Hall of Flamer. The crowd is dead for this. Tamina hammers away and it’s off to a chinlock.

At least we can look at Kaitlyn in those shorts of hers. Jack tries to say that the Divas Division is awesome right now and I begin to chuckle at him. Kaitlyn hits that old classic attack known as WHAT A MANEUVER (modified Side Effect) for the pin at 5:10. Again, can we just look at her for the rest of the show?

Rating: D+. These matches suck. That’s really all there is to say about it. I know Kaitlyn looks good, but is there really any need to have her wrestle? That’s one of the things that suck the time out of a Raw or Smackdown: the Divas matches. They’re not entertaining and most of the time they suck, yet they get a few minutes a week.

AJ/Percy Watson/Titus O’Neil vs. Derrick Bateman/JTG/Maxine

The Fascinating Fact this week: the black sheep of Maxine’s family is an unsavory bishop from the island of Butte, who owns a combined toilet factory who in his spare time sends full tapes of Shetland ponies to people. I think that was a play on words joke but I’m not sure. The girls start us off and Maxine is ticked off. AJ hits a jumping armdrag and things speed up. Maxine rolls to the floor after a spinwheel kick.

Off to JTG vs. Watson now and the good guys take over. Titus gets two off a clothesline and it’s back to Watson. Regal asks a good question: why do you need to dance about when you can hit someone in the mouth? Bateman hits a dropkick thanks to a Maxine distraction as we’re running out of time in a hurry. Jimmy the Gimmick hooks on a chinlock and then hooks a Regal Cutter of all things. Even Regal points that one out.

The announcers talk about how long this season has been. Even they don’t know when it’s ending. Somehow Regal turns this into a metaphor involving a hamster on a skateboard. You can’t say he’s typical. Off to O’Neil and everything breaks down. Clash of the Titus ends Bateman at 6:35.

Rating: C-. Not a bad match or anything, but this match sums up the problem with this season of NXT: Titus can beat Bateman. I looked it up and in this season, that is the 6th time O’Neil or O’Neil’s team has beaten Bateman or Bateman’s team. What in the world is there left for these two to prove? Nothing, but they keep the season going anyway.

Overall Rating: D+. I just don’t care anymore. When things were all going insane it was fun, but we’re going in circles on this show. Titus and the Usos dominate whoever they face, Bateman does nothing of interest and AJ still doesn’t like Maxine. That’s all we’ve seen for the last two months, but it never goes anywhere at all. I don’t get it, but I’m not WWE I guess. It’s not horrible, but it’s more boring than bad.

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NXT – October 19, 2011 – Still Chasing Its Own Tail

NXT
Date: October 19, 2011
Location: Mexican Sports Palace, Mexico City, Mexico
Commentators: Jack Korpela, William Regal

Obviously we’re in Mexico now and we only have two people left. The Young suspension may be a blessing in disguise as it might give them an opening to round out this season after the thirty two weeks they’ve had so far. After last week there aren’t any major loose ends that need to be tied up so maybe there’s a means to an end now. Let’s get to it.

We start in the ring….WITH A CHALLENGE??? Striker has a rope and there are flags around the ring ropes (not the one Striker is holding). It’s a capture the flag challenge. There are only O’Neil and Bateman left. This is worth 15 points to really make sure we make the rest of the challenges before this worthless by comparison. They both have on weightlifting belts and there’s a rope attached on their backs. Whoever can get the most flags wins. And after about 15 seconds Bateman jumps Titus and leaves him laying. Titus wins and the main event tonight is Titus/Percy vs. Bateman and whoever Bateman picks.

Tyler Reks vs. Yoshi Tatsu

Hawkins is limping to the rings with Reks. Reks and Hawkins complain about the injury and Reks sounds nothing like his looks would make you expect. Reks overpowers him to start so Tatsu chops away. Yoshi snaps off a spinwheel kick to take over so Reks, being a modern WWE heel, hides. Reks takes over again and the fans don’t seem all that impressed by him.

An O’Connor Roll doesn’t work for Tatsu and Reks works on the back a bit. Tatsu responds by hitting a big kick to the head…and never mind as Reks beats him down all over again. Yoshi dodges a charge and Reks’ shoulder hits the post. That allows Tatsu to go up top for the spinwheel kick and the pin at 4:33.

Rating: C-. Not much of a match here but it was fine. This was very basic as they were keeping things simple, primarily due to there only being about 4 and a half minutes to work with. Tatsu’s new look hasn’t meant much of anything, but at least he’s not talking about an action figure anymore.

Post match Reks and Hawkins beat down Tatsu but the Usos make the save. I smell a 6 man.

AJ has a note in the back when Kaitlyn comes in. It’s from Horny and he says leaving is the best decision he ever made. Kaitlyn says it’s from Maxine. Kaitlyn, who looks a lot worse with light blonde hair, fights Maxine next.

Kaitlyn vs. Maxine

Both of them look good but Kaitlyn looks better with darker hair. She has great legs though. Maxine is in essence in a swimsuit. Here’s your Maxine fact: her aunt is a careless maiden from Guadalajara who is engaged to a one legged Elvis impersonator who does a great version of Blue Suede Shoes. The match is your usual basic stuff here that isn’t very good.

Maxine hooks something like a dragon sleeper but Kaitlyn falls into the ropes. The fans here do not care at all. All Maxine so far but I’d rather look at Kaitlyn in gold so I’m not paying attention to the match here. Kaitlyn takes over with her horrible looking offense. She hits a Bubba Bomb and then a full nelson with her legs to make Maxine tap (with her foot) out at 4:48.

Rating: D. It’s your usual bad Divas match and more proof that AJ was the best choice for the 3rd season winner. Kaitlyn looks great in tight gold shorts and other than that, she’s about as worthless as anyone else you’re going to find on the roster. Not much here overall and the girls just aren’t that good. Granted this is on NXT so it’s not like anyone is watching them.

Video on how insane Raw has been lately and how its been in chaos, even dating back to Punk winning the title at MITB. This eats up like five minutes.

Kidd turns down Bateman to be his partner. Maxine comes up to yell at him for not being here. She leaves and JTG comes up to agree to be his partner. Oh my.

Percy Watson/Titus O’Neil vs. JTG/Derrick Bateman

Bateman vs. Watson gets us going and Watson shows off a bit. We go to the mat with a headlock as Regal explains exactly where the arm is supposed to be for it to hurt the most. Leave it to an old villain to know that. There’s a double tag and JTG gets his head kicked off. That was a nice touch because I don’t like JTG. O’Neil has black and pink on for breast cancer awareness. That’s always cool.

The good guys double team JTG for awhile and rule the ring as we take a break. Back with Bateman hammering away on Watson which doesn’t work all that well for him. They head to the floor and Bateman hits a missile dropkick off the apron which gets two back in the ring. Off to JTG again who hammers away a bit more. A spinning neckbreaker gets two. Watson tries to fight back and the fans react to it.

This match has somehow been going on for ten minutes. It’s one of those matches where nothing has been going on at all but it’s been happening if that makes sense. Titus finally gets the hot tag that we know has been coming for awhile now. Bateman breaks up the pin but misses a top rope cross body. Clash of the Titus ends this at 10:41.

Rating: D+. The match was pretty boring but the problem with it is that it summarizes the main problem that these guys are having anymore: there is no reason at all for these matches to take place. If we’re just waiting around for the end of the show and the matches don’t really count towards records or standings or anything, what’s the point? I mean, how many times can O’Neil pin Bateman before it stops meaning anything? I think that’s the question they’re trying to answer.

Overall Rating: C-. Not a horrible show but at the same time it reiterates the same issue I just went into: this show is chasing its own tail. We’re no closer to finding a winner of this competition than we were two months ago and the only thing that has really changed is that Young is gone and that’s not even because of the show but rather him being Wellnessed. Young will be able to return in about two and a half weeks and he’ll probably be brought back and we’ll be right back where we were two weeks ago. Such is the life of NXT I guess.

Results
Yoshi Tatsu b. Tyler Reks – Top Rope Spinwheel Kick
Kaitlyn b. Maxine – Full Nelson Leglock
Titus O’Neil/Percy Watson b. JTG/Derrick Bateman – Clash of the Titus to Bateman

 

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NXT – October 12, 2011 – Watson Plays It Straight Much Better

NXT
Date: October 12, 2011
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Jack Korpela, William Regal

It’s the second week of NXT on Wednesdays and I’m not exactly thrilled after last week’s boring show. It should be interesting to see how things go with no Darren Young for the next month or so due to him being wellnessed. Hopefully with the departure of all of the Pros that could mean we’re actually getting closer to the end of this show. Let’s get to it.

So if one of the rookies is Young, which one is wild?

Here are Bateman and Maxine to open the show. He sucks up to Vince and Johnny Ace for clearing up the catastrophe that was coming down to NXT. Bateman says that the opinions of himself and Maxine are the only ones that matter and makes fun of the hometown Cowboys. As a Cowboys fan……I don’t really care enough about Bateman to be upset about it.

Maxine talks a bit but is cut off by Titus and Percy. Percy talks about there being two rookies left so I guess Young is just being dropped? Bateman and Maxine run their mouths and kiss a bit which makes Percy freak out. O’Neil actually mentions the competition and says he should be on Raw or Smackdown. He’s right you know. Maxine implies she wants a match but here’s Striker who says he has match making abilities. It’s Watson vs. Bateman later and right now it’s AJ vs. Maxine.

AJ vs. Maxine

I think these are the only two girls on this show. This is joined in progress after a commercial with Maxine taking over with a choke for two. The fact of the week about Maxine: her cousin is a champion hula hooper from Bangkok and also grows prize turnips and also is an amateur credit mangler (not sure if that last part is right or not).

Maxine is totally dominant and goes from a dragon sleeper to a freaky looking chinlock. Literally all Maxine so far as the fans are into this. Either that or they’ve gotten really good at piping in noise on NXT. AJ finally gets in a shot and goes up for a cross body for one. After a bit more scrapping, a Shining Wizard beats Maxine at 5:00.

Rating: D. How could a match with women as attractive as AJ and Maxine that involves bending and twisting be so boring? There was nothing to see here which is at least partially because we’ve seen it so many times now. The girls are trying but there’s nothing to see here, especially with all of the stories they had going being forgotten now and things boiling down to they don’t like each other.

We talk about the tag match last week with Hawkins/Reks vs. the Usos.

Hawkins and Reks talk about how great they are and how they don’t need a family to get them here like the Usos do.

Long recap of Raw and all the stuff that went down on the night of a thousand stories.

Usos vs. Curt Hawkins/Tyler Reks

Hawkins starts with let’s call him Jey. The crowd is a lot quieter for this than for the girls. The twins control early and drop double headbutts on Hawkins for no cover as it’s off to Reks. Remember when Reks actually was on a Survivor Series team and a Bragging Rights team? That feels like it was so long ago. Back to Hawkins who gets beaten on even more, this time taking a two count off a Demolition Decapitator move. Hawkins is sent to the floor and Jey dives over the top to crush him. Jimmy does the same as we take a break.

Back with heel double teaming taking Jimmy down and it’s off to Reks. We hear about the tag division coming back up and that’s true for once. Know how they did it? They made teams. Why is that such a hard concept? You have a huge roster so why not throw some teams together? The double teaming goes on for a very long time as the match has totally changed after the break.

Regal goes on a small rant about Hawkins and Reks not being underutilized because it’s their job to get noticed, not someone else to give it to them. I like that idea that you have to have your own initiative to get into the thick of things like that. Reks puts on something like a Tazmission as Regal talks about how the mice are all throwing themselves onto mousetraps because his mother in law is coming.

Jimmy manages to send both of them to the floor and the fans wake up to an extent. There’s your hot tag to Jey and we get a Rikishi reference which might be the making a difference line. Jey hits the running hip strike to the head of Hawkins which is an Umaga move but they keep calling it a Rikishi one. Jey comes off the top rope but is caught in a powerslam for two. I thought that was it. Reks and Jey exchange missed finishers and a double superkick sets up a double Superfly splash for the pin on Reks at 12:20.

Rating: C. This had its moments but the heel beatdown segment was pretty long and dull. I wasn’t totally bored and the ending was a much better segment than the rest of it. I like that double splash and it’s cool to see the faces get some redemption (Oh I get it now) here. Good little match but if they cut out about two minutes it would have been much better.

Percy Watson vs. Derrick Bateman

Regal thinks Maxine is looking at him. Watson is so much better as a serious guy than the goofy one he was in Season 2. He takes over with his speed and power stuff but goes up to the middle rope and gets dropkicked in the back for two. Regal isn’t happy with the weak cover by Bateman. Now why can’t more commentators channel their inner Monsoon like that?

A whip into the corner gets two and it’s off to a body vice. We get the dreaded Jacob Novak reference and this show automatically drops a few notches. Watson fights back and a cross body gets two. Bateman takes over again and Regal is going into his third sage advice talk of the night. Abdominal stretch goes on by Bateman and we hear about Bateman getting his hands on a copy of John Cena’s workout strategy. Ok then.

Watson escapes and Regal praises Cena for a bit. Elbow misses for Derrick and we’re running very low on time so this is going to have to end soon. Watson hammers away and hits one of those dropkicks that is just a bit off for some reason. It always is. The spinning splash gets two. Bateman grabs a release gordbuster for two (with Regal talking about Arn a bit) but the falling bulldog is countered, allowing Watson to hit a fireman’s carry into a pancake for the pin at 7:00.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but it kind of came and went. Watson is so much better now that it’s not even funny. He needed to play things straight and that’s what he’s doing here. It works so much better for him this way and I could see him being a lower midcard guy on the main rosters. As for Bateman….just let us look at Maxine.

Overall Rating: C-. Pretty boring show tonight although the wrestling wasn’t bad. As is the custom around here, when they talk about the competition and have the rookies out there, the show goes downhill in a hurry. With Young gone though, at least we’re getting closer to having the end of the season. I guess the Redemption Points aren’t going to mean anything at all for the whole 30+ weeks this has been on are they? Weak show tonight but not horrible.

Results
AJ b. Maxine – Shining Wizard
Usos b. Curt Hawkins/Tyler Reks – Double Superfly Splash to Reks
Percy Watson b. Derrick Bateman – Fireman’s carry into a pancake




NXT – October 5, 2011 – Go Back To Tuesdays

NXT
Date: October 5, 2011
Location: Mississippi Coast Coliseum, Biloxi, Mississippi
Commentators: Jack Korpela, William Regal

After last week’s newest tag team debut in the form of Hawkins/Reks, there’s an actual tag division on this show which is more than most of the WWE and almost all of TNA can say right now. There are no Pros left and that’s certainly a good thing. It’ll be interesting to see how the walk out from last night will affect the show, but I’ll bet it’s not much at all. Let’s get to it.

Oh and this show is now on Wednesday and we were told that…..oh a good never after the show aired. I read it on a tweet on WWE.com. Nice job guys. Nice.

Two new developments today: first of all if you go to the NXT page it offers you the 9/27 show but if you go to the full episodes tab you can watch today’s show. Also, it offers you an option of voting for rookies. As in potential eliminations. That hasn’t been an option in MONTHS.

Here are Hawkins/Reks to open the show and we get a quick recap of them beating down the Usos last week. They’re invading the show tonight because everything is in chaos. Hawkins apologizes to the fans that watch the show, saying they’re not going to see O’Neil or Tatsu because it’s the Hawkins and Reks Show. Reks says that last night (the video is dated the 5th but Raw was on the 3rd) they walked out on HHH on Raw. He’s tired of opportunities being handed out and squandered. They’re sitting on the top ropes for this so it’s kind of a different looking thing.

Here come the Usos in street clothes. They talk about the lack of respect that Hawkins/Reks have for everything including the ring, the people and HHH. The tag match is made and the Usos clear the ring with a double superkick to Reks and a simple toss to Hawkins. How exactly has Hawkins, a former tag champion, never had an opportunity? I guess that’s in the whole pay no attention to it part of history.

Titus O’Neil vs. Derrick Bateman

Regal says he was torn about walking out on Raw. Titus takes over with his power game and gets two off a side slam and a shoulder block. Regal talks about Maxine’s uncle who is a defrocked abbot who teaches chimpanzees to ride unicycles and on Sunday mornings piddles around in flea markets. Can we just get an hour of Regal’s stories? Bateman takes over with a dropkick but gets a delayed two. The idea here is that Titus is off because there’s no Horny to coach him. Titus starts his comeback but Maxine gets in his way as he tries to go up top. Bateman goes for the knee and that stupid falling bulldog ends it at 5:06.

Rating: D+. Boring match here but at least there was an idea to it. Titus losing that fast makes the bulldog look better, but at the same time it’s still the falling bulldog. Is that really the best they can come up with for him? Also, I can’t believe we actually saw two Rookies fighting each other. It’s almost like this is a competition show or something.

The Raw ReBound eats up about five minutes

JTG and Young make fun of Yoshi for his makeup. They leave and Yoshi goes up to the makeup table but it’s missing. All that is left is a mirror with the letter H and the number 8 (hate) crossed out. The word CHEA is underneath it. So this is what this show has come to? JTG vs. Yoshi Tatsu. Oh me oh my.

Yoshi Tatsu vs. JTG

No paint for Yoshi today. JTG runs immediately and the chase is cut off as he hides behind Darren who has the makeup/paint. Yoshi kicks Darren upside the head and is like GO BACK TO BEWITCHED BOY! The distraction lets JTG take over and he pounds away. Off to a chinlock as we hear about JTG running through the streets of Brooklyn to show he’s not afraid. It also shows he’s an idiot but that goes without saying. Yoshi starts firing off the kicks and the chops because he’s Asian and that means he has to be a martial artist. Top rope spinwheel kick ends this at 4:50.

Rating: C. This was fine. It’s a traditional heel vs. face match and that’s all it tried to be. I kind of like that: there was a quick story made up with JTG as the bad guy and Yoshi as the good guy and the good guy got his revenge on the bad guy. It’s bare bones storytelling but that’s all it really needed to be. I liked it.

Video on Mark Henry who is big and mean.

Daniel Bryan vs. Heath Slater

The announcers talk about almost nothing but the walkout (trademark probably coming soon) but Bryan is his usual submission based self. Bryan hooks Slater’s feet in a surfboard position but jumps up and drives Slater’s knees into the mat. We talk about Regal training Bryan and Regal mentions he let him go on his own to avoid falling into some of the snares Regal fell into.

Now we talk about the end of the PPV because the match isn’t all that interesting. On the floor Slater is sent into the barricade and Bryan hits the running knee off the apron. Back in Bryan fires off a kick and shakes the ropes like Ultimate Warrior. A running dropkick in the corner gets two. Slater starts a comeback but walks into some kicks and a Regal Stretch for the tap at 5:43. Regal: “That’s the first time that move has been seen in 8 years.”

Rating: C-. This was really boring. I think it’s because Slater is officially a jobber to the stars and there’s almost nothing interesting in his matches anymore. Part of that is because of his name I think: what is a one man southern rock band? It tells you nothing about the character. I mean, something like Macho Man tells you he’s tough and Hulk sounds like someone big and imposing. One Man Rock Band says…..what exactly?

Usos vs. Curt Hawkins/Tyler Reks

We’ll call that Jey starts with Hawkins. Jimmy comes in and cheating takes him down. There’s almost no time left in the show so this isn’t going to last long. Hot tag to Jey who hits a Bubba Bomb and the running hip smash to the face for two on Hawkins. A double assisted Samoan Drop (Alley-Us, pronounced like the team’s name) gets two. Jey goes up but is slammed down by Hawkins. A top rope elbow ends the Usos at 4:53.

Rating: D+. Another boring match here in a string of them tonight. These five minute matches get a lot of people out there but there’s nothing interesting about them. I’d assume this is to keep up the tag title chase meaning something but don’t these teams need to compete somewhere else besides here on NXT? There are four teams here and I’ve seen one on Raw or Smackdown. That’s kind of missing the point isn’t it?

Overall Rating: D+. I wasn’t thrilled with this one and the biggest factor I can attribute that to is the Bryan vs. Slater match. It took time away from other matches and didn’t really add anything at all to the show. Bryan and Slater haven’t been parts of the show in months and the match felt like it was thrown in there to take up space on a shot that was a bit crowded already anyway. This was a step down from recent weeks.

Results
Derrick Bateman b. Titus O’Neil – Falling Bulldog
Yoshi Tatsu b. JTG – Top rope spinwheel kick
Daniel Bryan b. Heath Slater – Regal Stretch
Curt Hawkins/Tyler Reks b. Usos – Top rope elbow to Jey




NXT Is Now On Wednesdays

From what I can find the show is now airing Wednesday afternoons at 4pm.  Not that they told us this on the show or anything.  There’s a tweet linking it to another article about it.  I love WWE messing up little things like what time their show is.  I’ll have it up asap tomorrow night.  Sorry to the two people that read the reviews of it.




NXT – September 27, 2011 – The Pros Are Gone!

NXT
Date: September 27, 2011
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Commentators: Jack Korpela, William Regal

Another week here and after the last two weeks I’m assuming that it’s time for the Usos to face JTG and Young in what Gorilla Monsoon would call a main event in any arena in the country except the one we’re in now where it’s a filler match 2 spots down on the card because it’s a pair of teams that not many people care about. Also I’m sure Maxine and Bateman will try to further the split of Horny and AJ because….because….because that’s what bad people on an internet wrestling show do. Let’s get to it.

JTG and Young open the show and I still want to hurt JTG. Regal: “You know I absolutely hate him.” Young calls JTG a tag team specialist and they go over their tag team success here. They talk about winning NXT and then the tag titles but the Usos interrupt. They actually get to talk and no one seems that interested. We get clips of both Uso attacks after the wins by Team Annoying. The Usos talk about the Samoan heritage and how great at tag team stuff the Samoans are. Fan: “SHAD WAS BETTER!” JTG says the Samoans were a joke and gets chased to the floor. The tag match is mentioned.

Yoshi Tatsu vs. Jinder Mahal

Yep it’s officially the minor league show and not about a competition anymore. Yoshi’s music doesn’t really fit with the new look. Regal says he was at Mahal’s christening 25 years ago and was rivals with Mahal’s dad. We hear about how Yoshi was squashed by Mahal about two months ago and got some teeth knocked out in the process. I remember that match and if this isn’t better than that one, that says a lot.

Yoshi takes over with a headlock but a suplex gets Mahal out of trouble. A chinlock eats up a few seconds and Mahal takes over. Korpela: “What would your strategy be if you were Yoshi?” Regal: “Win the match.” You can’t buy this kind of analysis people. Regal follows that up by talking about Mahal’s uncle, the Indian Karaoke Champion: Getupta Singh. Back to the chinlock. A kick by Yoshi gets two. The Indian hits a Samoan on the Japanese but it gets reversed into a crucifix for two.

They go up to the corner and Yoshi blocks a superplex. Tatsu tries a dive as Regal talks about how you have to be a special kind of man to headbutt someone. Yes you do, but it takes a more special man to Coco Butt someone. As Yoshi is getting up he gets caught in the full nelson slam for the pin at 6:07.

Rating: C-. Not too bad but I feel sorry for Mahal. He was getting a fairly decent push on Smackdown or at least the opening stages of one and then that just kind of stopped. That’s another case of someone getting some kind of momentum and then the writers getting bored with him and so much for that. The match wasn’t bad but it’s nothing I’ll remember tomorrow.

Video on the Cell.

And now from that to something completely different as Horny is looking for AJ and has a note for her. Maxine tries to tell him that AJ is with Titus but Horny shushes her. Horny finds Titus and AJ (score one for Maxine) and the note (read by Titus for some reason) is a very poetic letter (it talks about being a boat tethered in a storm and stuff like that), basically saying that Horny is leaving NXT for Smackdown. AJ is sad but uh…isn’t she on Smackdown too? Horny leaves all sad and AJ points out just that: she’s on Smackdown too. I believe that officially eliminates all the remaining Pros.

Percy Watson vs. Tyson Kidd

Regal talks about how Punk winning would mean he has no more worlds left to conquer because he’d be WWE Champion. My face actually scrunched up and I looked up from my computer in a state of confusion over that one. Kidd speeds things up to start but Watson (much better without the glasses and OH YEAH) hits a dropkick for two. Korpela says everyone is talking about Watson’s vertical leap. Today I talked about how the Monopoly game is back at McDonald’s which means the McRib is back soon, but that’s just me.

Back in after a quick bit on the floor and Tyson hooks a chinlock. He shouts to the crowd and they don’t shout back. A belly to back breaks the hold up and both guys are down. Watson hits another dropkick and a clothesline in the corner. A spinning splash gets two as Regal makes fun of JTG a little more. Kidd hits something like a spinning neckbreaker that has a long name including the word moss that I don’t feel like typing and a springboard elbow for the pin at 4:12.

Rating: C. Kidd is getting better and better every week and thankfully he’s regularly appearing on Smackdown because of it. However, I’d like to see him doing something more than just appearing on NXT beating up random former NXT rejects. They need to just turn this into its own independent show and make an NXT Champion already so Kidd can challenge for it.

Mahal says not to talk about Khali because he’s the only one that matters. Most of this isn’t in English so it’s hard to really get what’s going on. I think he says eat more chicken. His eyes are all freaky looking. Tonight he’s returning to greatness.

Usos vs. JTG/Darren Young

Why does no one jump the Usos during that dance thing they do? I mean….it wouldn’t be that hard. JTG vs. let’s say Jimmy (like I can tell them apart) to start us off. I was watching the 88 Great American Bash and turned off Fantastics vs. Midnight Express for this. I have a feeling this isn’t going to be as good. Jimmy hits a northern lights suplex as we’re told that JTG never won a tag title despite being in a (not named) popular tag team.

Korpela talks about how there’s still a competition and says it’s about being the next break out star. There’s no mention of being on Season Six now. I think my blood pressure just dropped down to healthy. I think that’s Jimmy getting beaten down but I don’t particularly care enough to remember which has the chest tattoo. Hot tag brings in Jey who kicks and punches a lot. Young manages to grab a belly to back to Jimmy (I had them wrong) on the apron to shift momentum as we take a break.

Back with JTG coming in to pound on I guess Jimmy. After a long chinlock, Jey breaks up a cover and it’s off to Young. Regal explains the point of the rapid covers that don’t work as he says Young knows it’s not going to get a pin but it’ll drain Jimmy a lot. See, THAT is what an analyst is there for. He knows what he’s talking about because he’s been in there. It’s a lot better than saying someone is in the Fave Five which has about 27 people per week.

Jimmy’s back is worked on and Young sends him into the corner for two. Has anyone ever been pinned off an Irish Whip? Young slaps away at the back and hits a chinlock again, this time with the knee in the back. Maybe he did learn something in Nexus. Regal talks about how Young is working on the back. Korpela: “Good point.” Regal: “I know.” Jimmy breaks up the chinlock but JTG gets a tag to break it up again.

To my great surprise, this hasn’t been a very bad tag match. It’s amazing what random guys can do when they’re thrown out there and allowed some time to develop and get experience isn’t it? Jimmy sends JTG flying with something called an Alley-Us (I’d call it a flip but what do I know?). Either way it gets the tag in to Jey and the lower half of the house is cleaned. He hits the running Umaga smash to the face in the corner which Korpela says is shades of Rikishi and a double superkick sets up the superfly splash to Young for the pin at 11:23.

Rating: B-. I don’t know if it was the total lack of anticipation or expectations, but this was a pretty good match. The hot tag was obvious, but they built it up the whole time and with Regal talking about how good the back work was, I was getting into it a little bit at the end. Keep in mind that this was Usos vs. JTG/Darren Young and you’ll get why that’s a lot harder than it would be in most matches.

Post match the Usos celebrate but Tyler Reks and Curt Hawkins run in for an attack. Again, that is almost territory style as you bring in whatever random talent you can find for a quick feud/program with someone else after another program is over.

Overall Rating: C+. I liked this tonight because they got a step closer to making this the C show instead of the competition nonsense. Also it means no more Hornswoggle at least here which means maybe that story is over. AJ’s reaction to it made me chuckle too. When you look at this show, there’s the makings of some decent stuff, especially if they gave up on the competition and just let it be its own thing. Not bad here as it gets closer to dropping the NXT nonsense.

Results
Jinder Mahal b. Yoshi Tatsu – Full Nelson Slam
Tyson Kidd b. Percy Watson – Springboard Elbow
Usos b. Darren Young/JTG – Top rope splash to Young