Main Event – May 5, 2020: The Sad Reminder

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: April 30, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: MVP, Tom Phillips

No matter what the situations are around here, Main Event is going to Main Event. It’s been the same batch of repetitive matches and recaps. I was liking the random assortment of matches we were getting for a little while there and those have already stopped for the sake of it’s just Main Event. Lucky us. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Bianca Belair vs. Catalina

Belair shoves her down and then into the corner to start, followed by a running clothesline. We hit the abdominal stretch on Catalina, followed by a splash to the back into a nipup. A backbreaker cuts off Catalina’s comeback and we hit the double arm crank. That’s broken up and Catalina hits a running dropkick but Belair pulls her off the ropes. The KOD finishes Catalina at 5:43.

Rating: D+. Longer form squash here with Belair getting to showcase herself a bit, though it could have been done better. The match should have been a little shorter to make it more effective, though what we got wasn’t bad. Catalina was just there for the most part and that’s about all she should be around to do.

From Smackdown.

Here’s HHH for his big celebration and they’ve got a LONG time for this. HHH talks about how hard it is to believe that it’s been twenty five years….and here’s Shawn Michaels to interrupt. Shawn talks about how awesome this is and he has two words for you: “Social distancing buddy! Don’t touch!”. He’s sent out hundreds of invitations to HHH’s friends and family and they’re all here.

After we look at the empty arena, Shawn talks about how they’ve been friends for the entire twenty five years. He has some nice memories of his own twenty fifth anniversary celebration on Smackdown and HHH can’t even pick his favorite moment from that night. HHH can’t believe Shawn didn’t have his own celebration and promises heads will roll when he gets back into the office. Anyway, Shawn talks about how much money they were when they were in DX (ignore the fact that Shawn and HHH’s DX didn’t beat Nitro once of course) and we get get a blooper reel of DX moments. HHH: “Almost in one take.”

Shawn says his Wrestlemania career pales in comparison to what HHH did at Wrestlemania and we see a look at HHH’s Wrestlemania losses. Shawn: “You weren’t that good.” HHH: “How many losses did you have at Wrestlemania?” Shawn: “This isn’t about me.” After some more platitudes, Shawn gets to Stephanie No Fun, who calls HHH. Stephanie: “I’m watching your twenty fifth anniversary celebration.”

After more talking in a way NO ONE WOULD EVER USE IN REAL LIFE, Stephanie says to tell that lazy eyed….and the call ends. Shawn brings up Ric Flair, who calls in as well to praise HHH and his family. Flair: “Don’t let Shawn superkick you at the end of the segment.” Flair starts to cry to end the call, calls back, and cries some more as we take a break.

Back with Road Dogg on the phone saying HHH got a haircut but needs a bigger one. He finds out that he’s on live TV and gets out in a hurry. Shawn says they need to wrap this up but HHH says he called the bosses at Fox and says they can have all night. Shawn: “Good. We haven’t even gotten to the Katie Vick segment yet.” With that mind blowing line out of the way, here’s Vince McMahon himself for a big moment.

Vince goes into a story about seeing HHH wrestle for the first time. It was like the buildup to the egg hatching at Survivor Series 1990 and then it was such a big disaster. Vince then explains the Katie Vick story (without every detail of course) and the Bayley: This Is Your Life segment, which wasn’t a good idea but it wasn’t Bayley’s fault (Vince’s words).

Anyway, Vince loves him but this was a horrible way to go out. As HHH would say, it was ROTTEN. Vince: “If you haven’t put everybody to sleep by now, I’ll say goodnight.” The lights go out to end the show and some crickets chirp. Shawn: “Story of your career buddy. Story of your career.” This was a lot more lighthearted than I was expecting and there were some funny lines, but other than HHH and WWE, was anyone asking to see this for twenty minutes?

From Raw.

United States Title: Andrade vs. Apollo Crews

Crews is challenging and Vega is here with Andrade. Feeling out process to start with Andrade working on a wristlock. That’s reversed into an armbar as Vega isn’t looking pleased with the goings on. Crews’ front facelock doesn’t last long and it’s Andrade grabbing a headlock instead. They go to the floor for a bit, followed by Andrade taking him back inside to stomp away.

Some choking and a dropkick keep Crews in trouble but Andrade misses a running knee in the corner. That means a nasty crash to the floor but Andrade avoids a moonsault, causing Crews to tweak his knee as we take a break. Back with Andrade working on a half crab, only to miss the running knees in the corner. Crews hits an Angle Slam and they’re both down. An overhead belly to belly sends Andrade flying but he gets a boot up in the corner.

Crews is back with a press slam and the standing moonsault for two but Andrade is back with a whip into the corner. Now the running knees can connect for two as Vega is losing her mind. Crews blocks the spinning elbow but the gorilla press is countered into a DDT for two. The hammerlock DDT is countered into an enziguri and a powerslam gives Crews two of his own. Crews knocks Andrade off the top but misses a top rope splash and hurts the knee again. Andrade kicks him to the apron and the referee stops it at 16:45.

Rating: B-. I was surprised by the ending but this doesn’t feel like it’s over. Crews is someone who needs a major moment if he is ever going to break through and I’m not sure how much longer he can go without one. It’s not like Andrade has done anything with the title in four months, which is the case with almost anyone who holds it for almost any amount of time.

Money in the Bank rundown.

Humberto Carrillo vs. Murphy

Murphy takes him down by the arm to start so Carrillo reverses into a wristlock. A running hurricanrana into the springboard armdrag gives Carrillo two but Murphy sends him outside. Carrillo gets rammed head first onto the ramp and we take a break. Back with Murphy pounding away even more and grabbing the chinlock.

That’s broken up and Murphy charges into a superkick, meaning it’s time to forearm it out from their knees. A jumping enziguri takes Murphy down and it’s a springboard dropkick to send him outside. Back in and a missile dropkick gives Carrillo two but he has to roll out of the moonsault. Carrillo kicks him in the head for two more but Murphy hits a knee to the face. Murphy’s Law is good for the pin at 10:49.

Rating: C. Not too bad here and that’s as good as you’re going to get on a show like this. These two are in need of something to do, as Murphy being the lackey for the #1 contender isn’t exactly gold and Carrillo has been the same person since the day he debuted. Neither is on fire or even lukewarm at the moment, but maybe that can get better with time. Not that it likely will, but it might.

Video on Bray Wyatt vs. Braun Strowman.

Video on Drew McIntyre vs. Seth Rollins.

From Raw.

Jerry Lawler is in the ring to talk about Money in the Bank, including the Raw World Title match. Seth Rollins and Drew McIntyre come out and McIntyre tells Lawler to leave for this. Lawler is out in a hurry and McIntyre signs without much thinking about it. Rollins doesn’t sign yet so McIntyre says time’s ticking.

That sends Rollins into a rant about how he doesn’t want to do this but has to. This is bigger than all of them and Drew will be a great champion one day. Rollins has to do this because he had to suffer for that title. He doesn’t want what happened to him to happen to Drew because it is his burden to carry. When that time comes, Rollins can lead Drew as well. Drew: “You’re full of s***.”

Drew tells him to stop talking forever because no one wants to hear Seth talk. Rollins says that the big picture will be clear at Money in the Bank and he signs. He goes to talk about having faith but Drew sends him face first into the table. The ring is cleared and a headbutt drops Seth so the Claymore is loaded up. Cue Murphy to kick McIntyre in the head, earning himself a hug from Rollins. McIntyre is back up and Claymores Murphy to end the show. This was the latest in WWE’s rather long string of contract signings, most of which aren’t all that interesting. That was the case here, but Rollins’ delivery did help.

Overall Rating: C-. As usual, all this show did was point out how boring things are in WWE at the moment. We’re less than a month removed from Wrestlemania and you would never know it based on what we’re seeing. There is nothing that makes me care about what is going on and I don’t see that getting better anytime soon. They need a spark or at least a few hot matches, but that has been the case for way too long now.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – May 4, 2020: Anyone Can Have A Few Bad Years

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 4, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Samoa Joe, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton

We’re taped this week and that means it could be the last Raw with no fans in the building. That could hopefully bring some life to these shows, but there isn’t much of a reason to believe that is going to be the case. It’s the go home show for Money in the Bank and that means we need to build some momentum. May(be) the Force with be will them on that. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look back at the end of last week’s show with Murphy saving Seth Rollins and taking the Claymore for him.

Opening sequence.

MVP is in the ring for the VIP Lounge and talks about last week’s show breaking down into a brawl. We’re going to class things up a bit with the women’s Raw competitors, though they got in a brawl of their own last week. That means Asuka (with MVP speaking some Japanese to her delight), Shayna Baszler and Nia Jax all come out and have a seat.

MVP explains the rules and Nia asks if he even watches these shows. She is relentless and that is all she needs to dominate on Sunday. Asuka shouts in Japanese to confuse Jax so we’ll go on to Shayna, who speaks Latin to say she talks with actions. That’s what makes her different, right Asuka? More ranting ensues and a staredown is on with Shayna mocking her for everything until Nia stands up…and is knocked right back down. MVP has to break this up and a lot more staring ensues. This was rather odd and I’ll take that over another triple threat.

We look back at Apollo Crews’ knee injury from last week. There is a gauntlet match to name the replacement tonight.

Becky Lynch is back next week. It’s about time.

Gauntlet Match

We don’t know how many people are involved but Bobby Lashley is in first (minus Lana) and Titus O’Neil is in second. They shove each other a bit and the spear gets rid of Titus at 50 seconds. Akira Tozawa is in third and hits a quick Trouble in Paradise, followed by a missile dropkick. That just annoys Lashley and it’s another spear for the pin at 1:40.

Shelton Benjamin is in fourth and he sends Lashley into the buckle before he gets inside. A Blockbuster drops Lashley but he comes right back with forearms to the head. Shelton sends him to the floor and hits a running knee, followed by a slingshot faceplant onto the apron. A hard whip sends Shelton into the barricade and Lashley drives him in again for a bonus. Back in and the spear cuts Shelton in half for the pin at 3:47.

Humberto Carrillo is in fifth and we take a break as I roll my eyes at WWE bringing in three people for less than four minutes of work combined under these circumstances. Back with Carrillo kicking him in the head and hitting a missile dropkick for two. Lashley slams him off the top though and it’s time for some choking in the corner. He does it for quite a bit, and that’s a DQ at 10:49.

Lashley spears Carrillo in half so here are a bunch of referees to break it up. Angel Garza is in sixth and we take a break with Carrillo in big trouble. Garza chokes away in the corner as Zelina Vega is rather pleased. Carrillo is down in the corner so Garza TAKES OFF HIS PANTS and hits a running basement dropkick for two. We hit the bow and arrow on Carrillo, followed by a reverse slingshot suplex. A reverse Boston crab keeps Carrillo down and the Lionsault gives Garza two more. The Wing Clipper is reversed into a sunset flip though and Garza is done at 22:04.

Austin Theory is in seventh and we take another break. Back with Theory hammering away and putting on a waistlock before stomping Carrillo down in the corner. Carrillo comes back with a few kicks but the springboard spinning crossbody is forearmed out of the air. Theory’s top rope superplex connects but Carrillo ties the legs up in a small package for the pin at 26:55.

AJ Styles returns in the eighth spot and we take another break. Back again with Carrillo hitting a dropkick but getting planted down as Styles isn’t exactly sweating this. Another waistlock stays on the ribs and it’s off to an abdominal stretch, with Carrillo having to dive to the rope. AJ switches to the leg with a kick to the knee and a dragon screw legwhip. Carrillo pops up with a short DDT and they’re both down. A pumphandle gutbuster plants Carrillo and the Calf Crusher sends AJ to the ladder match at 38:49.

Rating: C. Not bad here, though I have no idea why we needed the first few names in there when Lashley slaughtered all of them. There isn’t much of a point in bringing them in for a show like this but I’m sure having Titus in there for 50 seconds was worthwhile in WWE’s minds. AJ is right back into the title scene and that’s a smart move, given the rather thin main event picture at the moment. Now can we please retire the gauntlet match for a long time?

Post match AJ wraps the leg around the post for a bonus. AJ says he isn’t a zombie or a ghost and there is no Undertaker here to steal his moment. He hasn’t lost anything because there are no rules in a Boneyard match. Now he has seized an opportunity and it’s worth it. He’ll do whatever it takes, and if that means throwing Aleister Black off the roof, that’s fine with him.

We get the first part of a Top Ten Money in the Bank moments countdown, including anything related to the briefcase at all.

Here’s Seth Rollins for a sitdown interview. Seth knows that Drew McIntyre is a dominant man but Drew is not a leader. It will not be Drew leading WWE into the future and while he will put up a fight at Money in the Bank, Rollins is willing to sacrifice himself for the greater good. Drew isn’t ready for what comes with being a champion so Seth is trying to unburden him from this responsibility. That’s what he will do on Sunday by becoming the new WWE Champion.

MVP gives Brendan Vink and Shane Thorne a pep talk. They’re ready to win and MVP looks pleased.

Murphy talks about Seth Rollins taking him under his wing and how much he has learned as a result. Now Murphy is going to get McIntyre ready for Rollins.

Brendan Vink/Shane Thorne vs. Cedric Alexander/Ricochet

Vink charges into Cedric’s boot in the corner but takes him into the corner for the tag to Thorne anyway. Ricochet comes in and kicks Thorne down for two but Cedric is pulled to the floor and sent into the barricade. Back in and we hit the reverse chinlock on Cedric, who powers out in a hurry and brings in Ricochet. Everything breaks down and Alexander knees Vink in the face. Ricochet kicks Vink in the ribs but Thorne hits Cedric with a running Cannonball in the corner. Vink kicks Ricochet in the face for the pin at 4:43.

Rating: C-. I’m sorry what now? If you want to push Vink and Thorne then fine, but having Vink, this newcomer with about five matches so far, pin Ricochet clean? Good on them for pushing new talent, but bad on them for having Ricochet take the fall, or even being in this tag team in the first place.

Street Profits vs. Viking Raiders

Non-title. Hold on though as the Profits talk about how they started here and then ran into the Viking Raiders. Tonight, they want the smoke. After a break, Erik backdrops Ford, who can’t quite stick the landing and thankfully doesn’t bang up his ankle. Ford flips around a bit and says you can’t touch him. That earns a forearm to the face as Ivar drops Dawkins on the floor.

A powerbomb into a top rope splash gives Ivar two but Ford dives over and makes the hot tag to Dawkins. That means a dropkick to Ivar and it’s already back to Ford. Ivar clotheslines Dawkins but it’s off to Erik, who drives Ivar into Ford in the corner for two. Things settle down to Ivar armbarring Ford but it’s broken up in a hurry. Another tag brings Dawkins back in to clean house and we take a break.

Back with Dawkins holding a chinlock on Erik and Dawkins coming in with a dropkick. Erik is up for the tag off to Ivar anyway and it’s a big clothesline to drop Dawkins. There’s a Bronco Buster for two but Dawkins gutwrench suplexes Erik for the double knockdown. It’s back to Ford who can’t manage to belly to back suplex Ivar. He can however enziguri him and double belly to back suplex Ivar with Dawkins’ help.

A moonsault gives Ford two but it’s back to Erik for more throwing Ford around. The Viking Experience is broken up and Dawkins spears Erik down. The spinebuster into the frog splash gives Ford two with Erik making the save. Erik throws Ford outside and the Viking Experience finishes Dawkins at 16:24.

Rating: C+. I’m not sure what was going on here but it didn’t feel like they were connecting. The action was fine, but it felt like they were in search of a way out. They kept doing a bunch of good sequences, though they just kind of kept coming and going until one of them finished Dawkins. On top of that, I’m not thrilled with the idea of seeing the rematch for the titles on Sunday. Why I’d want to see a sixteen minute match to set up a title match is beyond me. Have the Raiders beat Ricochet and Alexander and let Vink and Thorne beat a bunch of jobbers to get over (as you can still do you know).

Drew McIntyre is ready to take care of that confused young man Murphy.

More MITB Top Ten.

The Viking Raiders say this is dominance because they’re just better than the Street Profits. They extinguished the smoke.

We look back at AJ winning the gauntlet match and promo mentioning Aleister Black.

Black says being buried didn’t make AJ more humble. If AJ does throw him off, pray that he doesn’t get back up.

Rey Mysterio is ready for the first ever Money in the Bank ladder match at WWE Headquarters. It’s time for him to pull down the briefcase for the first time ever and become the WWE Champion again. The risk is worth the reward.

Here’s Charlotte for a chat. Charlotte talks about how she is the hardest working woman in wrestling because she works twice a week. This Wednesday she is defending her title against Io Shirai, who won a very hard hitting ladder match to get hero, but she will bow down to the Queen. Cue Liv Morgan to ask if Charlotte remembers her. Charlotte doesn’t quite take her seriously so Liv calls her out for being born with a silver spoon stuck…uh, somewhere. Sooner or later, Charlotte is going to be a champion and if she has to dethrone a self entitled queen to do it, that’s just fine. Charlotte laughs it off so let’s have a match.

Well we will in a minute as we need a video on Jinder Mahal first.

Charlotte vs. Liv Morgan

Non-title. Charlotte powers her into the corner and then to the mat to start, meaning it’s a nipup to show off a bit. A forearm to the back and some trash talk have Morgan in more trouble but she forearms her way out of trouble. Morgan hits a running hurricanrana and snaps off a middle rope missile dropkick. Charlotte sends her shoulder first into the post though and we take a break.

Back with Charlotte driving her face first into the mat a few times but Morgan fights back with a faceplant of her own. A sunset flip is blocked with some stomping and Liv hits a jawbreaker, followed by a springboard Codebreaker. Charlotte counters another hurricanrana into a sitout powerbomb for two but Liv gets to the middle rope.

A dropkick is countered (with the help of an edit) into the Boston crab, which sends Liv straight to the rope. Charlotte’s backbreaker out of the corner lets her go up top but Liv hits a Codebreaker to bring her back down for a rather near fall. Charlotte dodges Oblivion though and it’s the Figure Eight for the tap at 11:46.

Rating: B-. Well you knew Charlotte wasn’t going to lose here and thankfully Liv got a lot in the loss here. She was hanging with Charlotte until the end and that’s a mile ahead of where she was just a year or so ago. You can tell that they have plans for Morgan and that’s a good thing. They need some new names in the division and Liv is as good as anyone else for bringing someone from nothing to a contender.

The #1 moment in the history of Money in the Bank: Rollins cashes in at Wrestlemania. They needed to cut this into four parts to get to the most obvious choice possible?

Randy Orton is back next week.

We look at the inside of WWE Headquarters and a path wrestlers might take to the roof.

Drew McIntyre vs. Murphy

Non-title and Seth Rollins is watching from the stage. Murphy gets knocked outside early on and McIntyre throws him over the barricade for a bonus. McIntyre stares at Rollins a bit too much though and gets sent into the barricade. Back in and the Meteora gets two on McIntyre, who comes back with one heck of a chop.

Murphy strikes away again, only to get caught with a Glasgow Kiss. McIntyre knocks him hard off the apron though and it’s a top rope clothesline for two back inside. A super White Noise is countered though and Murphy hits a powerbomb for two. Murphy loads up his own Claymore but walks into the real thing for the pin at 6:21.

Rating: C. So yeah, the unstoppable champion pinned the lackey after a fairly competitive match. This was less a contest and more counting down until one of two possible conclusions. That’s what we got here and it wasn’t all that interesting. Rollins could be an interesting threat to McIntyre but sending Murphy out there isn’t the way to go about it.

Post match McIntyre begs Rollins to fight him but Rollins walks off instead. Rollins runs back to the ring and hits McIntyre with a knee to the face. He shouts about how this is bigger than either of them and looks at the title. The title is dropped though and McIntyre avoids a Stomp, setting up the Glasgow Kiss. Seth bails from the threat of the Claymore to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s enough good wrestling on here to carry things, but my goodness what a boring time of the year this is. This show was built around setting things up for Sunday and they went about that in a weird way. Why would I want to sit for three hours to see McIntyre beat up a lackey? It has no bearing on Sunday, it doesn’t do anything more than give McIntyre a tiny bit more momentum, and it’s not like it was that great of a match.

That was the case with a lot of stuff here. Aside from the gauntlet match, it didn’t feel like any of this mattered for the most part. The Raiders are likely getting a title shot (which you would have given them in other ways than having them beat the champs, who we know they can beat), Charlotte wins again because she’s Charlotte, and Drew vs. Seth continues to be fine for a first major feud for McIntyre’s title reign.

Nothing in here is overly interesting and it feels like you could skip everything from Wrestlemania to Money in the Bank. The problem is how many times of the year that could apply to and it’s a lot more than it should be. Nothing really stands out and I don’t remember the last time we had a hot midcard feud. You’ll get some interesting ones with good matches, but when was the last time you felt like someone was breaking their back to steal the show? I know the roster is capable of it, but WWE doesn’t exactly seem like they want that to happen.

Maybe it’s waiting on Money in the Bank to be decided so something else can feel important, maybe it’s the lack of fans or maybe it’s the post Wrestlemania slowdown, but these shows just aren’t clicking. It’s like they’re placeholder shows, but that is the feeling far too often. We need something to light a spark in this company and I don’t see that happening anytime soon, which has been the case for years now.

Results

AJ Styles won a gauntlet match last eliminating Humberto Carrillo

Brendan Vink/Shane Thorne b. Cedric Alexander/Ricochet – Big boot to Ricochet

Viking Raiders b. Street Profits – Viking Experience to Dawkins

Charlotte b. Liv Morgan – Figure Eight

Drew McIntyre b. Murphy – Jumping knee to the face

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – April 27, 2020: Talk To Me

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 27, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips,

We’re coming up on Money in the Bank, meaning it is time for wrestlers to start building momentum by getting pins or submissions to build to a match that has nothing to do with pins or submissions. If nothing else, there’s a heck of a drinking game to be played regarding how many times commentary references climbing the corporate ladder. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We open with MVP’s VIP Lounge. MVP talks about how awesome Money in the Bank is going to be and brings out Rey Mysterio, Aleister Black (MVP: “Please don’t break anything.”) and Apollo Crews. Rey is asked what it means to be Mr. Money in the Bank but MVP won’t let him answer, saying that it’s just another great moment on an already legendary career. Black probably wants to be moved up to stardom. Crews actually gets to speak….for a few words as Zelina Vega and company cut him off.

Zelina laughs at the idea of any of the three of them winning Money in the Bank. The WWE Universe can’t get enough of the three of her people because they are the future. The three people in the ring were the future at one point but they would mean Mr. Money in the Bank is on Smackdown. What needs to happen is her three replacing these three, but Rey isn’t buying that. The brawl is on and Zelina’s guys are sent outside to get read for the upcoming six man.

Andrade/Angel Garza/Austin Theory vs. Rey Mysterio/Aleister Black/Apollo Crews

Hey look it’s the most obvious six man tag since the last time they set up an obvious six man tag. Black and Garza grapple on the mat to start with Black slipping away and grabbing an armbar. It’s off to Crews to armdrag Theory into another armbar, followed by Rey sending Theory into the corner. Andrade has to break up a double 619 to Garza and Theory so Rey sends him into the ropes for the 619 instead.

That doesn’t work either so Black and Crews hit big running flip dives over the top as we take a break. Back with Theory working on a reverse chinlock on Black and it’s Andrade coming in for some kicks tot he ribs. Theory is back with the front facelock and a torture rack to send Black into the corner. Black comes out with kicks to the face and a rolling victory roll for two but there’s no hot tag yet.

Another kick to the face rocks Theory though and it’s off to Rey to clean house. Garza tries to throw Rey at Andrade but it’s a hurricanrana to take Andrade down instead. A gutbuster drops Rey though and GARZA TAKES OFF HIS PANTS! Back from another break with Mysterio still in trouble in the corner, including a gorilla press drop from Theory.

Mysterio tornado DDTs his way to freedom and Crews gets the second hot tag to pick up the pace again. Crews powerslams Theory but Theory slams him down for two. The ATL is broken up and it’s Black coming back in to set up the parade of everyone knocking each other down. Andrade’s spinning back elbow gets two on Crews, but the toss powerbomb finishes Andrade at 24:26.

Rating: B-. This was long but didn’t get dull, which is a rarity for a match like this one. Crews getting the pin helps, though it isn’t going to matter much if he is dropped after the pay per view. Having him go after the US Title would be fine, as it’s not like the title has been anything of note now.

Didn’t get enough HHH praise on Smackdown? Well tonight it’s the Top Ten Moments of HHH’s Career! We’ll start with HHH taking over the leadership of DX the night after Wrestlemania XIV.

9. Beating Sting at Wrestlemania XXXI. It was one of the goofiest things I’ve ever seen and I loved every second of it, save for HHH winning and the post match handshake after a sledgehammer to the head.

Andrade is mad about the loss and blames his partners. Crews can’t beat him one on one. Andrade and Zelina leave when Crews comes in to say he can beat Andrade again, even if the second match is tonight. Andrade comes in and says bring it on. That means a HARD slap and the title match is set for tonight.

Video on Seth Rollins vs. Drew McIntyre.

8. Beating the Rock in the first Smackdown main event.

7. Stephanie walks in on HHH and Trish Stratus. That still works.

Asuka vs. Nia Jax vs. Shayna Baszler

Before the match, Asuka yells about Nia injuring Kairi Sane and says that she tapped Nia out two years ago. Baszler pulls Asuka to the floor to start the beating in a hurry, including a whip into a barricade. Nia breaks that up and gets kicked in the head by both of them as we’re still waiting on the opening bell. Asuka sends Baszler into the steps but gets dropped HARD by Nia. Nia throws in a ladder and runs both of them over as the referee seems to have left rather than try to make this a match. Nia teases tossing a ladder onto the two of them but drops it down instead. No match.

Bobby Lashley asks Lana to stay in the back for the next match. She’s so beautiful and it’s a distraction you see.

Bobby Lashley vs. Denzel DeJournette

Lashley takes him down without much effort to start and it’s a trip to the corner for some forearms to the chest. Denzel gets in a shot to the face so that’s an ax handle to the back. A release suplex drops Denzel again sets up the spear for the pin at 1:43.

We look at Liv Morgan beating Ruby Riott last week.

Liv Morgan vs. Ruby Riott

Ruby trips her down to start but a headscissors out of the corner is reversed into a faceplant. The Riott Kick connects out of nowhere and Ruby is stunned by the kickout. Ruby stomps on her fingers and talks trash against the ropes but Liv is right back with the springboard Downward Spiral (Oblivion) for the pin at 2:55. Liv still has a long way to go but having her win matches is the first step.

Post match Liv says she is still trying to figure out who she is but she’s confident she can work it out.

6. Beating Mankind to win the 1997 King of the Ring.

Money in the Bank rundown.

Nia Jax isn’t worried about people not liking her and threatens Charly Caruso a bit. No one can do anything about what she does, including Asuka and Shayna Baszler.

The Viking Raiders are ready for the Street Profits and the Tag Team Titles. The Profits have never beaten then and that isn’t changing at Money in the Bank. As long as they are around, the Profits will always be second best. Prove them wrong.

5. The NXT Invasion in 2019. Couldn’t you just say NXT overall?

Jinder Mahal vs. Akira Tozawa

Mahal slams him down to start and takes Tozawa to the floor. Choking against the barricade and tosses into various things keep Tozawa down. Back in and a Samoa drop plants Tozawa and the Khallas gives Mahal the pin at 1:37. This was Mahal doing the same stuff with shorter hair.

Zelina isn’t happy with Charly for asking Andrade a question. Zelina and Andrade leave but here’s Garza to say he and Charly should get better acquainted. He even has a rose for her and the smile is on.

4. DX impersonates the McMahons. Some of these are a lot more questionable than others.

United States Title: Andrade vs. Apollo Crews

Crews is challenging and Vega is here with Andrade. Feeling out process to start with Andrade working on a wristlock. That’s reversed into an armbar as Vega isn’t looking pleased with the goings on. Crews’ front facelock doesn’t last long and it’s Andrade grabbing a headlock instead. They go to the floor for a bit, followed by Andrade taking him back inside to stomp away.

Some choking and a dropkick keep Crews in trouble but Andrade misses a running knee in the corner. That means a nasty crash to the floor but Andrade avoids a moonsault, causing Crews to tweak his knee as we take a break. Back with Andrade working on a half crab, only to miss the running knees in the corner. Crews hits an Angle Slam and they’re both down. An overhead belly to belly sends Andrade flying but he gets a boot up in the corner.

Crews is back with a press slam and the standing moonsault for two but Andrade is back with a whip into the corner. Now the running knees can connect for two as Vega is losing her mind. Crews blocks the spinning elbow but the gorilla press is countered into a DDT for two. The hammerlock DDT is countered into an enziguri and a powerslam gives Crews two of his own. Crews knocks Andrade off the top but misses a top rope splash and hurts the knee again. Andrade kicks him to the apron and the referee stops it at 16:45.

Rating: B-. I was surprised by the ending but this doesn’t feel like it’s over. Crews is someone who needs a major moment if he is ever going to break through and I’m not sure how much longer he can go without one. It’s not like Andrade has done anything with the title in four months, which is the case with almost anyone who holds it for almost any amount of time.

3. Evolution.

We look back at Crews vs. Andrade. More on this later.

The Street Profits don’t like what the Viking Raiders said. Last week the Profits were putting in work while the Raiders were doing Carpool Karaoke. It’s true though: the Profits have never beaten them. That can change next week.

We look at a clip of Becky Lynch’s 24 as she won the Raw Women’s Title last year at Wrestlemania. Everyone knows she is ready to be a star. Becky: “What do you do when all your dreams come true? Make up some new ones.” This feels about eight months late.

Cedric Alexander/Ricochet vs. Ever-Rise

Martel gets sent into Alexander’s knee to the ribs and it’s a running flip neckbreaker into a backbreaker for two. It’s off to Parker, who gets in an elbow to Ricochet’s back to take over. Ricochet fights out of a chinlock though and it’s off to Cedric to start cleaning house. Everything breaks down and Cedric hits a standing moonsault for two on Martel. Ricochet dropkicks Parker to the floor and it’s a top rope double stomp into a Downward Spiral to finish Parker at 4:08.

Rating: C-. Just a match here with Cedric and Ricochet looking fine in a short win. It’s fine to put them together for something to do, even though Ricochet should be a star on his own at the moment. I’ll take it over him doing nothing at all though and that’s what his alternative seems to be at the moment.

Post match MVP pops up on screen to introduce Brendan Vink and Shane Thorne. They want a rematch and MVP sees box office platinum. Cedric and Ricochet are fine with that.

2. The DX invasion. Good grief how many times do we need to see this same stupid clip?

Crews now has a wrap on his knee and is limping around on crutches. Charly comes up to say this probably hinders his progress. Crews starts crying and leaves without saying anything.

Another McIntyre vs. Rollins video.

1. The quad tear and return. If my memory serves me right, we saw almost all ten of these moments on Friday. We’re just lucky enough to see this collection twice you see.

Next week: Street Profits vs. Viking Raiders for the Tag Team Titles.

Jerry Lawler is in the ring to talk about Money in the Bank, including the Raw World Title match. Seth Rollins and Drew McIntyre come out and McIntyre tells Lawler to leave for this. Lawler is out in a hurry and McIntyre signs without much thinking about it. Rollins doesn’t sign yet so McIntyre says time’s ticking.

That sends Rollins into a rant about how he doesn’t want to do this but has to. This is bigger than all of them and Drew will be a great champion one day. Rollins has to do this because he had to suffer for that title. He doesn’t want what happened to him to happen to Drew because it is his burden to carry. When that time comes, Rollins can lead Drew as well. Drew: “You’re full of s***.”

Drew tells him to stop talking forever because no one wants to hear Seth talk. Rollins says that the big picture will be clear at Money in the Bank and he signs. He goes to talk about having faith but Drew sends him face first into the table. The ring is cleared and a headbutt drops Seth so the Claymore is loaded up. Cue Murphy to kick McIntyre in the head, earning himself a hug from Rollins. McIntyre is back up and Claymores Murphy to end the show. This was the latest in WWE’s rather long string of contract signings, most of which aren’t all that interesting. That was the case here, but Rollins’ delivery did help.

Overall Rating: C. I liked this one more than recent weeks as they certainly have a focus going into the pay per view. That being said, it’s not the most interesting time in the world and waiting around to get to the ladder match can be a tedious few weeks. They had some nice stuff this week, but it would be nice to get done with the ladder match so we can get back to some more normal shows.

Results

Apollo Crews/Aleister Black/Rey Mysterio b. Andrade/Angel Garza/Austin Theory – Toss powerbomb to Andrade

Bobby Lashley b. Denzel DeJournette – Spear

Liv Morgan b. Ruby Riott – Oblivion

Jinder Mahal b. Akira Tozawa – Khallas

Andrade b. Apollo Crews via referee stoppage

Cedric Alexander/Ricochet b. Ever-Rise – Downward Spiral/Top rope double stomp combination to Parker

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Main Event – April 16, 2020: It’s Sad

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: April 16, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton

Things continue to go in the same fashion as always around here: very little actually matters on this show but it gives you a way to remember what took place earlier this week. That being said, the fact that Main Event is taking place in the same setup and venue as all three of the big shows continues to mess with me for some reason, just as it did when it was the before Raw show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Liv Morgan vs. Santana Garrett

Garrett gets thrown into the corner to start and a headlock takeover puts her on the mat. There’s a whip into the corner as Garrett seems to have lost some hair. A handspring

elbow hits Liv in the corner but she drops Garrett again and grabs the chinlock. That’s broken up so Liv snaps off a running hurricanrana, only to get nailed with a left hand. Back up and Morgan slugs away, setting up a running enziguri. The springboard Flatliner finishes Garrett at 4:38.

Rating: C-. You can tell that Morgan has grown up a bit as of late as she looked more in control this time around. That’s a good thing, but she has a very long way to go. On the other hand there’s Garrett, who seems to check all of the boxes for being a star but she has never come close to meaning anything even in NXT. Granted she has never had a chance, though I’m not sure I’d bet on her at this point.

From Smackdown.

Braun Strowman vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Non-title and Cesaro is here with Nakamura. Strowman dodges some kicks to start and kicks him down into the corner without much effort. There’s a big toss across the ring and the beating is on. Strowman takes him outside and even manages to yell at Cesaro before hitting Nakamura again. A charging Nakamura is dropped onto the barricade and we take a break.

Back with Strowman throwing him around even more and hitting the running splash in the corner. The powerslam is broken up so Nakamura hits the running kick to the face. Strowman isn’t having that and he blasts Nakamura with a clothesline. The running shoulders on the floor hit Nakamura and Cesaro but Nakamura hits the running kick to the chest for two. Kinshasa is loaded up but Strowman reverses into the running powerslam for the pin at 7:48.

Rating: C. This was a good and mostly dominant first match for Braun as champion and that’s how it should have been. Nakamura is long past the point of being a threat to the title but he still means a bit. He certainly means more than Cesaro at this point so they made the right choice.

Post match it’s time for the Firefly Fun House, with Bray standing next to a sign saying The History of John Cena and bray Wyatt. We see clips of the firefly Fun House match and Bray says Cena was right: we really can’t see him. That brings Bray to Braun and we see some of their history as well.

Bray talks about giving Braun a home but Braun turned his back on him. He can forgive Braun, but only Ramblin Rabbit agrees. Braun isn’t playing though and wants to fight. That’s cool with Bray, because he wants the title back. Bray brought him into the world and will take Strowman out. Bye! Braun says hang on because he’s ready to let Bray in anytime. Braun: “Bye! See you later!”

From Raw.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Kairi Sane vs. Nia Jax

Sane gets thrown around to start as Asuka is VERY excited in the back. Back to full screen and it’s a clothesline into a toss around by the hair. A gorilla press into a Samoan drop (the Annihilator) finishes Sane at 2:36. Total squash.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Humberto Carrillo

They flip around to avoid each other to start until Humberto hits some dropkicks. Some more dropkicks set up an enziguri for two but Shelton hits a knee in the corner. We take a quick break and come back with Humberto caught in a chinlock. Carrillo fights up and kicks him in the ribs, followed by the missile dropkick. A standing moonsault hits Shelton’s knees but Carrillo is fine enough to kick him down again. Carrillo goes up top, knocks Shelton down, and hits the moonsault for the pin at 9:13.

Rating: C-. This was fine enough but Carrillo continues to be a hole of charisma. He can do the flips and dives well enough, but he’s just a guy in tights who jumps around a lot and can’t talk very well. There have been tons of those over the years and it’s not like Carrillo is doing anything better than anyone in particular. Not bad, but I’m not seeing the star power WWE seems to think he has.

Video on Otis vs. Dolph Ziggler at Wrestlemania.

Video on Drew McIntyre winning the WWE Title at Wrestlemania.

From Raw.

Drew McIntyre vs. Andrade

Non-title and Andrade has everyone with him. McIntyre starts stomping away in the corner early on and even catches Andrade with a kick to the chest for trying to jump over him. They head outside with Andrade bouncing on top of the barricade. A Garza distraction lets Andrade pull him into the post though and the chops are on. McIntyre’s arm is sent into the steps and it’s an armbar back inside.

The armbar over the rope keeps McIntyre in trouble and a shot to the arm breaks up a suplex attempt. McIntyre boots him in the face though and hits a top rope shot to the head into a nip up. A spinning back elbow rocks McIntyre but he’s fine enough to backdrop Andrade onto Theory and Garza. Back in and Vega’s distraction lets Andrade crotch him on top but McIntyre escapes the hanging DDT. There’s the reverse Alabama Slam into the Claymore for the pin on Andrade at 5:31.

Rating: C. Not too bad here though I kept waiting on Rollins to interfere and cost McIntyre the match. I wouldn’t have had the US Champion get pinned when he had a big numbers advantage but that title being protected is a long forgotten hope. McIntyre picking up another win is a good thing though as he can mow people down to become the new dominant force around here.

Post match Garza chop blocks McIntyre and here’s Seth Rollins to superkick the champ. A pair of Stomps to McIntyre ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. As usual, having these shows in the same empty arena just makes you realize how much Raw and Smackdown have lost by being in the same situation. The original stuff was nothing here and it’s not like they had much to look at from the regular shows. Not a terrible show, but these empty arena shows have taken the soul out of a soulless product.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




New Column: Nobody’s Perfect Or How Dr. Seuss Taught Me To Chill

Good thing I wrote this on Tuesday and nothing else happened since then.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/kbs-review-nobodys-perfect-dr-seuss-taught-chill/




Monday Night Raw – April 6, 2020: The Yokozuna Treatment

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 6, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton

We’re finally past Wrestlemania XXXVI and that means it’s time to start getting ready for presumably Money in the Bank, assuming they actually get to run the show. I’m not sure what they’re going to be able to do long term but they got through Wrestlemania and that’s what matters. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Wrestlemania if you need a recap (Part Two)

We open with a look at Drew McIntyre defeating Brock Lesnar to win the Raw World Title.

Opening sequence.

Asuka vs. Liv Morgan

Asuka kicks her in the ribs to start and scores with the hip attack for a bonus. Liv manages to knock her to the floor and snaps off a hurricanrana as we take a break. Back with Asuka stomping away and hitting a running knee for two. Liv gets in some clotheslines and a faceplant to stagger Asuka, with a double stomp out of the corner getting two. Asuka is right back with the cross armbreaker but Liv backflips into a cradle for two. That’s fine with Asuka, who pulls her into the Asuka Lock for the tap at 10:06.

Rating: C-. And that seems to end or at least downgrade the Morgan experiment for the time being. I’m sure she’ll come back in the near future but at least she got the Wrestlemania moment. By beating Natalya. On the Kickoff Show. That counts for something, right?

We look at Becky Lynch retaining over Shayna Baszler.

Becky is proud of her year long reign and thinks Shayna underestimated her. She’s ready for anyone.

Baszler talks about the agony of defeat and isn’t done with Becky.

Tag Team Titles: Austin Theory/Angel Garza vs. Street Profits

The Profits are defending and Zelina Vega is here with the challengers. Garza bails from Dawkins to start so it’s off to Theory, who gets dropkicked down. A double flapjack puts Garza onto Theory and we take a break. Back with Theory hitting his rolling dropkick on Dawkins and cranking on the arm. Some stomping keeps Dawkins down and the armbar goes on. It’s off to Garza to work on the legs to mix things up a bit but Dawkins manages to suplex Theory. The hot tag brings in Ford and everything breaks down, with Vega getting involved for the DQ at 10:04.

Rating: C-. If that’s where they’re going, I’m not sure if they needed the first Wrestlemania title match. The match felt tacked on in the first place and now there’s this, which felt like your usual Raw match with the angle at the end to set up something else. The tag division is nothing right now and I’m not sure who the Profits are supposed to face going forward.

Post match the brawl continues with Bianca Belair running in and going after Vega. The ring is cleared so Belair challenges Vega for right now.

Zelina Vega vs. Bianca Belair

Belair powers her down to start and flips forward, only to have Vega get in a slap to the face. That’s too far for Belair, who throws her down by the head. A missed charge goes into the post though and Vega ties her up in the ropes with something like a crucifix chinlock. Belair powers out of a dragon sleeper and Ford grabs the camera in celebration. Theory blocks a moonsault attempt though and the guys get in a fight. Everyone gets inside and the match is thrown out at 4:26.

Rating: D+. They’re going all the way with this trio of matches tonight aren’t they? Belair being out there was a good way to introduce her, though you might think she would just get a clean pin here instead of being used to set up something else. You can do that, but do you really need to let the match be thrown out?

Post match, six person challenge.

Street Profits/Bianca Belair vs. Zelina Vega/Austin Theory/Angel Garza

Dawkins throws Theory around to start and it’s Ford coming in, only to spend too much time trash talking. That earns him a forearm to the back to send Ford outside and it’s a cheap shot from Garza for a bonus. The chinlock into a front facelock keep Ford in trouble and Theory sends him outside. Back in and Ford powers out of a sleeper so Theory knocks Dawkins off the apron. Ford enziguris Theory down though and it’s off to Belair to ragdoll Zelina with a backbreaker. The handspring moonsault connects as everyone else fights on the floor. The KOD ends Vega at 5:26.

Rating: C-. Well at least they got to the right ending. The Profits are long established so having the focus on Belair here makes sense. She’s come a long way in NXT and it would be nice to see her getting a push around here. The women’s division certainly needs the boost and maybe she can do it.

We look at Lana costing Bobby Lashley the match against Aleister Black.

Lashley isn’t happy with Lana and walks away from her.

Aleister Black vs. Apollo Crews

Crews has been signed over from Smackdown. Black front facelocks him to start but Crews powers out into a headlock. Crews shoulders him down but Black flips over him and has a seat, sending Crews bailing to the floor. Back from a break with Black grabbing an armbar but Crews knocks him outside. A belly to back suplex keeps Black in trouble on the floor but he’s right back in with a kick to the chest for two. Crews backdrops him to the floor and scores with a moonsault as we take another break (In this match?).

Back again with Crews hitting a clothesline for two and the chinlock goes on. Black fights up and kicks away until a powerslam gives Crews two. A shot to the leg doesn’t do much to Crews, who hits an enziguri into the toss powerbomb for two more. Crews clotheslines him down and goes up top, only to miss the splash.

A kneebar has Crews in more trouble but he makes the rope. They trade kicks and Black is sent outside as we take a third break. Back again with Black kicking him in the face for two more but Crews hits a dropkick. Crews catches him on top and hits a superplex for a delayed two.

The knee gives out on a gorilla press attempt so Crews gets in a sitout powerbomb for two more. Now the gorilla press sets up the standing moonsault. The standing shooting star press gets the same and they’re both down again. Crews dives into the jumping knee to the face though and Black Mass finishes at 27:26.

Rating: B-. This wasn’t exactly what I was expecting when I saw these two being paired together but surprises can be fun too. Crews continues to have all of the athletic abilities in the world but not much in terms of success. Black got in some good stuff here but Black Mass is something that can make him a star for as long as he wants.

Video on Edge beating Randy Orton in the Last Man Standing match.

Cedric Alexander/Ricochet vs. Oney Lorcan/Danny Burch

Lorcan takes Alexander down into a front facelock and it’s quickly off to Burch for a chinlock. Alexander fights up and brings in Ricochet but has to fight off Burch and Lorcan at the same time. A triangle dropkick puts Burch on the floor and it’s back to Cedric for an enziguri into a front suplex. Ricochet’s standing shooting star and it’s the Neuralizer into the Benadryller for the pin on Lorcan at 3:37.

Rating: C. They packed some action into this one and that’s a good thing to see. Alexander and Ricochet are two guys with nothing else to do and the tag division certainly could use a boost. Then again I don’t know how much of a future they have as the tag division never goes anywhere for very long, but the nod is better than nothing.

Video on Kevin Owens beating Seth Rollins.

Owens has spent several months asking himself if it is worth it to spend this much time facing Rollins. Then he dove off the sign at Wrestlemania and pinned Rollins, which made it all worth it. Now he needs to find something new to do, so maybe we need to find out who needs the next Stunner.

Seth Rollins vs. Denzel Dejournette

Denzel is from NXT and gets sent outside early on. A whip into the barricade sets up the Stomp to give Rollins the pin at 1:23.

Nia Jax vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Jax says fight her and blasts Purrazzo with a clothesline. She does it again for a bonus and it’s the Samoan drop into a fisherman’s DDT to finish Purrazzo at 1:36.

Video on the Boneyard match.

Humberto Carrillo vs. Brendan Vink

Carrillo starts fast with the springboard armdrag to put Vink on the floor but he forearms his way out of a suicide dive. Back in and Vink hiptosses Carrillo down so we can hit the chinlock. Carrillo fights up with a dropkick into a moonsault though, setting up a missile dropkick. A kick to the face into the top rope moonsault finishes Vink at 3:23.

Rating: D+. Just a match here and not much of an entertaining one. I get why WWE wants to push Carrillo but he just isn’t clicking. He can do all of the in-ring stuff just fine but there is a connection issue that needs to be fixed. That isn’t something you can just turn off and on though and I think WWE might be realizing it with him. Maybe this gets better, but it hasn’t shown any signs of doing so yet.

Video on Charlotte winning the NXT Women’s Title.

Charlotte talks about everything she has accomplished and how she has done everything. Rhea Ripley is great and now she has bowed down to the Queen.

Video on Drew McIntyre winning the WWE Championship.

We get some post Wrestlemania footage of McIntyre coming back into the arena wearing the title for an interview. Drew talks about how he can’t believe that he got here and it hasn’t sunk in yet. He thanks everyone who has gotten him here, including Paul Heyman. During the match with Brock Lesnar, Heyman said keep giving Drew the F5 because he can’t keep getting back up.

That made Drew think about all the times he has had to get back up so the F5’s just angered him over and over again. Now he’s WWE Champion….and here’s the Big Show with a referee. Show congratulates him and wants a match right now, not even for the title. Drew says he just beat Brock Lesnar so that’s not happening right now. Show thinks that’s fear but Drew knows what’s going on. That earns him a slap so Drew is ready to go.

Raw World Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Big Show

McIntyre is defending. Show starts fast and slams him down to bang up the ribs a bit. A headbutt cuts the champ off and a Vader Bomb gets two. There’s another slam to work on the ribs even more and Show chokes on the ropes while asking what Drew is made of. The big chop misses and Drew swings away, setting up a slam for two in a good looking spot. Drew goes up top and dives into a chokeslam for two. The KO Punch misses though and it’s the Claymore to retain at 6:57.

Rating: D+. A competitive match here is fine but my goodness they had me worried that they would actually do something this bad. The match was the usual slow and plodding Big Show deal but at least they didn’t pull the trigger for the sake of promoting Big Show’s Netflix series. Points for the drama, but negative points for making me think about the possibility.

Overall Rating: C. Well they did something different and that’s what mattered here. This show didn’t feel boring and was as good of a post Wrestlemania show as they could have had in this situation. They kept the show moving and we had a good enough night as a result. I don’t know if we should expect it going forward, but this was a step up from the recent Performance Center TV shows. I’ll take what I can get at this point so well enough done.

Results

Asuka b. Liv Morgan – Asuka Lock

Street Profits b. Austin Theory/Angel Garza via DQ when Zelina Vega interfered

Bianca Belair vs. Zelina Vega went to a no contest

Street Profits/Bianca Belair b. Zelina Vega/Austin Theory/Angel Garza – KOD to Vega

Aleister Black b. Apollo Crews – Black Mass

Cedric Alexander/Ricochet b. Oney Lorcan/Danny Burch – Benadryller to Lorcan

Seth Rollins b. Denzel Dejournette – Stomp

Nia Jax b. Deonna Purrazzo – Fisherman’s DDT

Humberto Carrillo b. Brendan Vink – Moonsault

Drew McIntyre b. Big Show – Claymore

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania XXXVI Night One: Broken Undertaker

IMG Credit: WWE

Wrestlemania XXXVI Part 1
Date: April 4, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentator: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield
Host: Rob Gronkowski

Sweet goodness that does not feel right. I’m not sure what to expect tonight because WWE didn’t feel the need to tell us what was going to be taking place on either night. This show is going to have about a hundred asterisks in the history books and that’s perfectly fine, but it doesn’t make things any less disappointing (not that it’s WWE’s fault). Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Cesaro vs. Drew Gulak

Gulak takes him down by the arm to start but Cesaro powers up with a backbreaker to get out of trouble. That earns him a LeBell Lock (which Cole calls a Crossface, missing the point of the move almost entirely) to send Cesaro outside so Gulak dives on him for a bonus. Back in and Cesaro’s arm gets snapped across the top rope and a clothesline puts him on the floor again. Cesaro gets sent into the steps but he’s able to uppercut Gulak out of the air back inside for two. The Neutralizer can’t work but Cesaro uses the left arm uppercut and goes with a (no hands) spinning torture rack slam for the pin at 4:05.

Rating: C. Just a match here and it did well enough with the warmup stuff, though my goodness it’s going to be a rough couple of nights. The lack of crowd reaction is going to hurt things a lot but that was always going to be the case. They were a little more energized than usual, but Cole on his own and nothing else as far as noise is going to make for some tough going.

Stephanie McMahon welcomes us to the show to explain that we are on a closed set with no audience. Tonight, they are going to be making people happy, because this is Wrestlemania. There’s your first WWE pat on the back of the night.

Instead of an original version of America the Beautiful, we get a montage of versions of the song played at previous Wrestlemanias. That’s a good one at least.

The opening video goes into the full pirate theme but the narrator says hang on a second because this is too cliched. Instead, he walks us through everything included, such as shots of heroes and catchphrases. It turns into a regular trailer, complete with the same narrator telling us to forget everything we know coming into tonight. Fate leads the way and fate has a funny way of surprising us. We go into For Those About To Rock for a better intro. I love pirate movies so this worked well for me.

Rob Gronkowski welcomes us to the show and says he’s the right man for the job because he knows how to start a thirty hour party. Mojo Rawley comes in to take some chops and it’s time to go to the ring.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Kabuki Warriors vs. Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross

The Warriors are defending for the first time since mid December. Asuka laughs at Bliss to start and it’s off to Sane before anything happens. Kairi knocks Bliss down and messes with her bow so it’s a slap to the face, allowing Bliss to mess with Kairi’s hair for a change. It’s off to Cross for a running basement dropkick but Sane powers her into the corner. Asuka comes in and gets forearmed in the chest as everything breaks down.

Nikki dives off the apron to take out Sane, meaning it’s time for a hug back inside. Back in and Nikki sends Sane to the floor, only to have her dropkick through the ropes cut off. Cross gets taken into the corner but manages a sunset flip for two, setting up the tag to Bliss. That’s fine for Sane, who hits an Alberto top rope double stomp for her own two. Asuka works on an armbar but her bulldog is broken up.

Not that it matters as a kick to the face drops Bliss for two more. Bliss gets up and avoids a charge, allowing the hot tag to Cross to pick up the pace. Sane rakes her eyes but Asuka walks into the Purge. The Insane Elbow breaks up the cover though and they’re both down again. Cross goes for a rollup but gets pulled into the Asuka Lock.

That’s broken up with Twisted Bliss but Sane Intercepts Bliss to put everyone down. Cross catches Sane on top but gets caught in a powerbomb/top rope forearm combination for a rather near fall. Back up and Cross hits the Purge to drop Sane, setting up Twisted Bliss for the pin and the titles at 15:03.

Rating: C. This could have been worse but it went on a good bit too long. The title change was supposed to be a feel good moment but when the titles have never meant anything beyond their first few weeks, the impact isn’t really there. Cross was pushed as the star of the match and it was fine enough, though I have no faith in the futures of the titles.

The Artist Collective have a plan for Daniel Bryan.

Elias vs. King Corbin

Hold on though as Corbin shows us a clip of his attempted murder of Elias last week so Corbin demands a forfeit. Cue Elias to break the guitar over Corbin’s back and a good posting so we can get started. Elias elbows him down for one and a swinging neckbreaker gets the same. Corbin gets in a toss to the floor though and Elias is sent shoulder first into the post. Some elbows to the shoulder keep Elias down as Cole tries to make this story sound intense.

Corbin shouts at commentary a lot and then sends Elias shoulder first into the post again. Elias manages to reverse a whip to send Corbin’s shoulder into the post though and it’s time for a breather. Some clubberin in the corner puts Corbin down but he grabs Deep Six for two. Elias knees him in the face for two more but Corbin rolls away before the top rope elbow launches. An uppercut lets Corbin put his feet on the ropes for two so Elias grabs a rollup with tights for the pin at 8:53.

Rating: D. Raw style match here and that’s not the best thing in the world. It was fine for a revenge match as Elias was aggressive but pinning Corbin is more damaging to him than pin. That being said, Elias being launched off a ten foot high balcony is just an eight day injury now? Come on already.

We recap Becky Lynch vs. Shayna Baszler. Lynch has been Raw Women’s Champion for a year now and has beaten everyone there is to beat but Baszler won a triple threat match, also including Bayley, at Survivor Series. Baszler was unstoppable in NXT and bit Becky’s neck to draw a lot of blood. Then she ran through the Elimination Chamber to earn the title shot in the most obvious result in years. Becky has been trying to play mind games but Baszler is such a killer that she doesn’t seem too bothered.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Shayna Baszler

Becky is defending and drives her semi truck to the arena for her big entrance. Baszler wastes no time in going for the Kirifuda Clutch but Becky is outside in a hurry. Baszler follows but Becky sends her into the steps a few times and Baszler is banged up early. Back in and Becky hits her missile dropkick, setting up a beating in the corner. It’s too early for the Disarm-Her though and Becky has to get out of the Kirifuda Clutch.

A spinebuster into a double underhook spinning faceplant gets two and Becky is sent to the apron. They slug it out until a Rock Bottom onto the apron plants Baszler. A powerbomb into the cross armbreaker has Becky in trouble until she stacks Baszler up for two. That’s reversed into the Disarm-Her on Becky, followed by a knee to the face for another near fall.

Becky goes to the apron and gets in a Stunner over the ropes, setting up a quickly broken Disarm-Her over the ropes. Baszler reverses that into an even more quickly broken Kirifuda Clutch to send Becky outside. This time Baszler follows her out and swings Becky head first into the announcers’ table like she did on Raw. Back in and the standing version of the Clutch goes on but Becky flips backwards into a cradle to retain at 8:42.

Rating: B-. Uh….ok then. I have no idea why they need to keep the title on Becky at the moment as she has literally held the title for a year and is getting close to the modern record. I’m not sure what the point is in keeping it on her here as the only thing left is a submission match with Baszler or a one on one match with Rousey, which doesn’t seem likely. Good match, but pretty confusing result.

Undertaker is getting a limited series on the WWE Network. Makes sense given the upcoming 30 year mark.

Intercontinental Title: Sami Zayn vs. Daniel Bryan

Zayn is defending with Cesaro, Shinsuke Nakamura and Drew Gulak all at ringside. Sami hits the very long pause button to start and Bryan finally gives chase, allowing Cesaro to cut Bryan off. They do the same thing again but this time it’s Nakamura playing Cesaro’s role. Gulak and Cesaro get into a fight on the floor until Gulak sends Nakamura over the barricade. Gulak nearly gets in a fight with Sami for the DQ but Bryan finally chases Sami down on the ramp.

Bryan starts in on the leg as Sami loudly begs off, only to be sent outside. That means a heck of a suicide dive, followed by a running dropkick in the corner for a bonus. Some knees to the face have Sami rocked but he scores with some forearms to slow Bryan down. Bryan fights back up but Cesaro and Nakamura jump Gulak. That earns them a double suicide dive, allowing Sami to kick Bryan out of the air for the surprise pin at 9:20.

Rating: C+. Nice match here with another surprising finish. Sami is a rather good choice for the cocky champion who keeps surviving and after everything he’s done over the years, I like the idea of letting him have the title for a bit. Throw in the issue of Bryan possibly self quarantining and there was little reason to switch the title here. Well other than the idea of Bryan facing a challenger of the week in one great match after another.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Jimmy Uso vs. Kofi Kingston vs. John Morrison

Morrison is defending for his team in a ladder match. Some monkey flips don’t work to start so everyone goes to the floor to grab a ladder each. Jimmy gets knocked down first and comes up holding his leg. Morrison stomps both of them down on the mat but has to fight off the SOS onto the ladder. Trouble in Paradise misses as well and it’s Kofi vs. Jimmy slugging it out on top.

That goes nowhere so Morrison takes Kofi’s place, leaving Kofi to springboard through the ladder…and then get caught and dumped to the floor. Morrison puts a ladder over the middle rope and climbs to the top of the post for a corkscrew Swanton onto Jimmy onto the ladder. The climb takes too long though and it’s Kofi springboarding in for a hurricanrana to take Morrison down in a unique spot.

A running dive over the top takes down Morrison and the ladder and they’re all down on the floor. Back in and Morrison hits the super Spanish Fly on Kofi, followed by the Superfly Splash from Jimmy. Kofi headbutts Morrison off the top of the ladder before diving off the top with the double stomp to Morrison’s chest. Jimmy slides in another ladder and wedges it inside the standing ladder.

A HARD whip sends Kofi face first into the bridged ladder and Morrison gets superkicked out of the air. Jimmy goes up but Morrison shoves the ladder over, sending Jimmy down for the big crash (it was such a drop that he changed directions after landing). Kofi catches Morrison on top for the slugout but here’s Jimmy with another ladder to put all three up at once. They all pull the title hook down at once and it’s a triple headbutt to knock Morrison down with the titles to retain at 18:36.

Rating: B. This felt like a good ladder match that would have made it into a great one had it been in front of a crowd. What we got was good enough though and the dives and landings were rather awesome. I liked this more than almost anything else but my goodness it’s hard to watch them land like this with no one being there to watch. Good match, but sad in its way.

We recap Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins. Seth has turned into the Monday Night Messiah but Owens doesn’t think much of him. They both had teams built up but the AOP is sidelined due to Rezar’s injury and Samoa Joe is suspended. Therefore, it’s one on one with the idea that Owens has never had a Wrestlemania moment. That’s not quite how history works, but it’s what we’re getting.

Seth Rollins vs. Kevin Owens

Rollins is in white but the glove has been some king of Tiger King referenced. Owens slugs away to start and hits a backsplash to put Rollins on the floor in a hurry. A backdrop onto the apron has Owens in trouble and a Falcon Arrow onto the apron makes it even worse. The suicide dive is broken up with a right hand but Rollins is fine enough to hit the Sling Blade.

Owens hits a DDT to get a breather and the Swanton connects for two. The Pop Up Powerbomb misses and so does the Stunner, allowing Rollins to hit an enziguri. Owens blasts him with a clothesline though and it’s a double knockdown. Rollins is up first and hits some superkicks to set up the Stomp, only to get reversed into the Pop Up sitout Powerbomb for two. They head outside with Rollins hitting him with the bell….and that’s a DQ at 10:09.

Hold on though as Owens says Rollins isn’t much of a god if that’s the best he can do. Owens wants to continue it No DQ so Rollins is back in to knee him in the head as the bell rings. Rollins throws him to the floor and the steps bounce off of Owens’ head, followed by a chair to the back. Owens bells him in the head a few times (it rings even if you hit someone with the board underneath it) and then climbs the sign for a huge backsplash to send Rollins through the announcers’ table. They stagger back inside for the Stunner to finish Rollins at 17:26 (counting the break in the middle).

Rating: C. I wasn’t big on this match in the first place and the whole Owens has never had a Wrestlemania Moment deal is still stupid but at least they didn’t stick with the DQ. This feud has lost almost all of the steam that it had in the first place so hopefully it’s done here. Granted when you don’t have much of a TV show to lord over, you’re not going to be the best messiah in the world.

Mojo and Gronk talk about how great the show is when R-Truth comes up to complain about how hard everything is. Gronk knocks him down and Mojo gets the title back. Notice the completely fine announcers’ table in the background.

Paul Heyman scares Charly Caruso but says Drew McIntyre is the one who should be afraid. In 24 hours, McIntyre is being exposed as a fraud and he can crawl out of the ring, victimized and conquered.

We preview tomorrow’s matches.

Smackdown World Title: Braun Strowman vs. Goldberg

Goldberg is defending. Strowman can’t get the powerslam and it’s a pair of spears to drop him in the first minute. Make it three straight for two and then a fourth cuts Strowman down again. Strowman counters the Jackhammer into the powerslam and then another one and then a third and then a big running fourth for the pin and the title at 2:13. You could have gone either way but it’s better to have someone actually active instead of Goldberg. Strowman as champion is about two years overdue, but I can’t imagine this lasts very long.

Wrestlemania XXXVII is in Los Angels.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Undertaker, which is all about AJ not being impressed by the modern Undertaker. He has called out Undertaker’s real life family and Undertaker has been acting more like BikerTaker than the Deadman as they head into a Boneyard match.

Undertaker vs. AJ Styles

They are in a graveyard for this one and there goes the gong as a hearse pulls up to the gate. The casket is pulled out by some druids and it’s AJ inside for a good surprise. Undertaker rides in on the motorcycle to Metallica and AJ talks about Michelle McCool digging the grave. Undertaker goes after him so AJ grabs a rock, only to get sent into an open casket. Undertaker punches through a window and cuts his arm open but throws AJ on top of the hearse anyway.

Some right hands knock him off the hearse and Undertaker has a seat while asking if AJ wants more. After Undertaker quotes Clubber Lang (“You want some more? I got a lot more.”), AJ throws some leaves in his face and gets in a low blow. Undertaker stands up after some right hands and knocks AJ down again, this time into a grave. Cue the OC as this has turned into a western.

A bunch of light comes out of a building and the walls come down to reveal a bunch of masked men. They surround Undertaker and do the eternally brilliant thing of attacking him one at a time. With that taken care of, Anderson and Gallows jump Undertaker but he isn’t about to be hit with a shovel. Instead Undertaker takes it back and beats them down, allowing AJ to break a tombstone over his back.

AJ hammers away and calls him an old man but breaks his fingers on Undertaker’s head. They fight through a wall and both lay on the ground sound like they’re dead. AJ says Undertaker is nothing but Undertaker flips him off and says come on. A shovel over the back puts Undertaker down in a grave and AJ goes to the machine with a barrel of dirt. Then a light shows up behind him and Undertaker pops up to beat on him some more. AJ climbs up a well placed ladder to get on the roof of the barn, so Undertaker makes flames come up to keep him in place.

Anderson and Gallows are up there too, with Gallows being thrown off. Anderson gets Tombstoned onto the metal roof and Undertaker chokeslams AJ off the roof. Undertaker climbs down and asks AJ what his wife’s name is now. They’re just getting started as Undertaker carries him over to the grave. AJ apologizes so Undertaker picks him up and says AJ put up a great fight. Undertaker hugs him and says most people wouldn’t have given him that kind of a fight. Undertaker turns to leave….and then knocks AJ into the grave. Undertaker gets in the machine and pours the dirt on AJ for the win at about 18:30.

Rating: A+. I don’t know what else you could have wanted from this match. This went so far beyond anything resembling sane or rational and went into complete insanity territory, making it one of the most entertaining things I can remember WWE doing in a LONG time. Of course it’s not good but that’s the point. This was entertaining, and that’s a lot more than you are going to get out of most Undertaker matches these days. Watch this and be prepared to laugh quite a bit, because it’s like Final Deletion but with production value.

AJ’s hand sticks out of the dirt as Undertaker gets on his bike. He throws up the fist so more fire comes up on the building and the Undertaker symbol lights up to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I’m really not sure how to grade this one but I liked some parts of it well enough. The problem really is in the atmosphere, as the show feels so weak that there isn’t much that can be praised. The people were working hard and I feel so bad for them to not get their big Wrestlemania stadium experience. What we got was fun at points, but the lack of crowd energy or big show feeling made it more of a chore to watch at times. It definitely has its moments though, and I didn’t hate it by any means. Check out the main event for sure though, probably with some friends to watch with you, and have a good time.

Results

Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross b. Kabuki Warriors – Twisted Bliss to Sane

Elias b. King Corbin – Rollup with tights

Becky Lynch b. Shayna Baszler – Rollup

Sami Zayn b. Daniel Bryan – Helluva Kick

John Morrison b. Kofi Kingston and Jimmy Uso – Morrison pulled down the titles

Kevin Owens b. Seth Rollins – Stunner

Braun Strowman b. Goldberg – Running powerslam

Undertaker b. AJ Styles – Undertaker buried Styles

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXXV (Original): I Still Don’t Believe It

IMG Credit: WWE

Wrestlemania XXXV
Date: April 7, 2019
Location: MetLife Stadium, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips
America the Beautiful: Yolanda Adams

As long as this show is going to be, there’s something special about getting to see it every year. This year’s show is built around the three major matches and the question of how many happy endings we can have. You know it’s not going to be all three, but which of the three doesn’t go through. Those matches consist of Universal Champion Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins, Smackdown World Champion Daniel Bryan vs. Kofi Kingston and the winner take all match for both Women’s titles as Ronda Rousey faces Charlotte and Becky Lynch in a genuinely historic main event. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Tony Nese vs. Buddy Murphy

Nese is challenging after winning a tournament and wastes no time in trying a jumping knee. Murphy gets sent outside but is fine enough to drop Nese ribs first onto the turnbuckle as we go split screen for an ad. Well at least they didn’t do this during the TV build. Back to full with Nese fighting out of a chinlock and suplexing the champ into the corner. Murphy gets tied in the ropes for a Lionsault but catches Nese with a superkick. A spinning faceplant gets two and some knees to the face have Nese in more trouble.

Nese is fine enough to hit a reverse hurricanrana and they trade a series of strikes to the face. Nese’s kneeling over the back piledriver gets two, followed by the 450 for the same. Murphy is right back up with Murphy’s Law but Nese gets a foot on the rope. With nothing else working, Murphy tries Nese’s running knee in the corner but walks into a superkick. A German suplex into the corner sets up the real running knee to give Nese the pin and the title at 10:43.

Rating: C+. Pretty good stuff here, even if I can’t imagine Nese holding the title very long. He’s the New York guy so it makes sense to have him win the title for a feel good moment. It wasn’t the most surprising thing in the world but it’s a good idea to open the night with a mostly short but effective match. Not bad at all, though Nese is a short term champion at best.

Kickoff Show: Women’s Battle Royal

Naomi, Lana, Nikki Cross, Asuka, Mickie James, Kairi Sane, Ember Moon, Ruby Riott, Sarah Logan, Liv Morgan, Zelina Vega, Dana Brooke, Eve Torres, Mandy Rose, Candice LeRae, Maria Kanellis, Sonya Deville, Carmella

It’s a wild brawl to start with Nikki Cross chasing Maria in a circle and getting rid of her. Asuka sends Nikki out and LeRae is out as well. Ember Eclipses Lana (as Captain Marvel) and knocks out Naomi, followed by another Eclipse to Mandy. Lana manages to get rid of Ember and insists that she’s #1 before kicking Sane in the face. Sane goes up and gets shoved to the apron, leaving us with a Lana vs. Logan staredown.

The Riott Squad gets together and dumps Lana but Sane is back in with the Insane Elbow on Logan. The Squad gets rid of Sane though and Logan lifts Morgan up for a flipping Stunner on Vega. Now it’s Asuka taking the triple teaming but she slides back in from the apron. Dana of all people fights back against the Squad and gets rid of Ruby. Logan is out as well but Vega blocks a cartwheel elbow.

Mandy and Sonya get rid of Vega and Brooke as we’re down to Logan, Rose, Deville, James and Asuka. James superkicks Mandy out but gets eliminated by Sonya to get us to three. Asuka sends Deville to the apron but Logan dumps both of them out….as Carmella slides back in, JUST LIKE LAST YEAR. Carmella knocks Logan over but Logan keeps her feet above the floor. A superkick gets rid of Logan to give Carmella the win at 10:30.

Rating: D. Hey, remember last year when someone snuck back in at the end and won the Women’s Battle Royal in a big surprise despite doing nothing coming into the match where someone could have gotten something out of it? No particular reason for asking of course. The match was your usual deal of everyone standing around until it was time for them to be eliminated until the ending. It was shorter than last year’s though and that’s an improvement. Oh and so much for Lacey Evans winning the thing as a surprise.

Kickoff Show: Raw Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. Zack Ryder/Curt Hawkins

The Revival is defending and this wasn’t announced on the Kickoff Show. Dawson takes Hawkins into the corner to start and gets two off a rollup. It’s off to Ryder vs. Wilder, the latter of whom gets the loudest cheer of his career after he decked the guy who jumped Bret last night. An armbar keeps Ryder down and Dawson comes back in to rip at Ryder’s face. Ryder gets in a suplex and tosses Wilder into the corner but Dawson knocks Hawkins off the apron.

We hit the chinlock on Ryder for a bit until he backdrops his way to freedom, allowing the hot tag to Hawkins. A backslide gets two on Dawson and Wilder gets knocked off the apron. The double clothesline gives us a double knockdown and it’s back to Ryder. The middle rope Rough Ryder hits Dawson and Ryder suplex suplexes Wilder to the floor for a scary crash. Hawkins throws Ryder back in for the tag but Wilder breaks up the cover.

Wilder DDTs Ryder on the floor and Hawkins takes a brainbuster to put all four down on the floor. Back in Dawson is rather cocky about beating Hawkins, who seems to be a bit dead. You never want to be too cocky in wrestling though and it’s a small package to pin Dawson for the titles at 13:21.

Rating: C. Ignoring Hawkins losing 269 matches in a row and not having a win since November 2016, Ryder not winning a non-Main Event match on TV since December 2016 and the team not winning a match together since 2008, this makes perfect sense. The love for the New York fans is strong tonight, which makes me wonder what kind of horrible things they have in mind for the main card. Just let the Revival go sit at home until their contracts are up though because I’d rather they go out with just this humiliation rather than seeing what else WWE could think of for them.

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Colin Jost, Michael Che, Braun Strowman, Otis, Tucker, Kalisto, Gran Metalik, Lince Dorado, Ali, Titus O’Neil, Konnor, Viktor, Matt Hardy, Jeff Hardy, Andrade, Jinder Mahal, Harper, Bo Dallas, Bobby Roode, Apollo Crews, Bo Dallas, Luke Gallows, Karl Anderson, No Way Jose, Tyler Breeze, Chad Gable, Heath Slater, Rhyno, Shelton Benjamin, EC3

Hey Harper is back. The SNL guys bail to the floor as Breeze and EC3 are both out. Shelton and Dorado are eliminated as well with Strowman throwing everyone he comes near. Harper vs. Strowman gets a big reaction but everyone piles onto them to break it up. Titus misses a charge and gets eliminated, followed by Ali tornado DDTing Jose and tossing him. Strowman gets sent into the post and goes through the ropes to the floor as Anderson is tossed.

Rhyno is out as well and the Hardys get into a mini match with Roode/Gable, with Roode being eliminated. Metalik gets thrown out by Mahal and Andrade monkey flips Kalisto out. There goes Gable as the ring is clearing out in a hurry. Tucker runs the Ascension over and there’s a double Caterpillar to both of them. The Ascension is thrown out but Strowman tosses Heavy Machinery.

Mahal is out next as Harper tries to suplex Ali, only to have Strowman kick them both out at the same time. We’re down to Strowman, Che, Jost, Matt, Jeff, Apollo and Andrade. Apollo and Andrade go to the apron and Andrade snaps off a hurricanrana to eliminate both of them in a dumb move. The Hardys try to pull Strowman out but the SNL guys come in and fail to throw them out.

Strowman shrugs them off and dumps the Hardys, leaving him alone with Jost and Che. One of them grabs a mic and says this doesn’t have to end in violence, so here’s his therapist to talk Strowman through this. Strowman beats him up and gives him a chokeslam (good thing the therapist knows how to take a flat back bump) before slapping Che out. A running boot in the corner misses and Jost goes for the elimination but gets shoved away. Strowman throws him out for the win at 10:24.

Rating: D. Yeah it was stupid and the SNL guys were annoying, but it was on the Kickoff Show and the right person won so I can’t complain all that much. Strowman should have won something bigger than this but at least he comes away with something instead of just being tossed out like anyone else. You know, like they did with Asuka in the first match.

Yolanda Adams sings America the Beautiful.

Helicopters fly over the stadium instead of the usual planes.

The opening video features wrestlers talking about this being the biggest stage and them being the players and storytellers. We see stills of famous Wrestlemania moments as the wrestlers talk about having the chance to live forever. They switch into a regular video of everyone involved with Lynch saying that they are the storytellers. This is a great idea, but not exactly practical when you consider that this is Wrestlemania GET EVERYONE ON THE CARD.

Here’s Wrestlemania host Alexa Bliss to say that Wrestlemania needs a goddess. She snaps her fingers…..and here’s Hulk Hogan. Well that works. Hogan: “It’s great to be back here in the Silverdome brother!” Ok that was funny. Hogan: “Ok it’s great to be back here in the MetLife Center!” He hits the catchphrase and poses with Bliss as Paul Heyman of all people storms out between the two of them. Heyman goes to the ring and says if they’re not closing the show, they’re not hanging around. They’re getting their business done and going to Las Vegas where Lesnar is ULTIMATELY appreciated.

Universal Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins

Lesnar is defending. Rollins has a new BEAST SLAYER graphic but Brock knees him off the apron and it’s an F5 on the floor before the bell rings. Lesnar throws him into various things at ringside and then over the announcers’ table a few times. They get inside but the referee won’t start the match because Rollins isn’t ready. Lesnar tosses him outside again for another whip over the announcers’ table and through the top piece of the table.

They go back inside and Rollins is mostly dead but gets to his feet for the opening bell. Three straight German suplexes let Lesnar bounce as Rollins’ back is all kinds of pretty colors. The F5 is escaped and the ref is bumped, allowing Rollins to hit the low row. Rollins hits the low superkick and the Stomp connects. A second and third Stomp give Rollins the title at 2:30.

Jerry Lawler joins commentary.

Randy Orton vs. AJ Styles

The CGI graphics are back with Orton’s being a HUGE snake that made me jump. Battle over respect between the two of them as Orton has asked why it took AJ so long to get here. An early RKO attempt is blocked so Orton goes with a thumb to the eye and the Orton Stomp. AJ gets back up with the dropkick and the slingshot forearm to the floor drops Orton again. Orton is thrown back in and knocks AJ into the barricade. The chinlock doesn’t last long as AJ fights up with the Phenomenal Blitz and a basement forearm.

The Styles Clash is blocked and Orton tries the hanging DDT, which is reversed into the Calf Crusher. Once the rope is grabbed AJ goes to the apron and loads up the Phenomenal Forearm but drops back down as Orton jumps for the RKO and crashes, allowing AJ to hit the springboard 450 for two. Orton is back up with the top rope superplex as the fans are interested in something else.

The hanging DDT plants AJ and Orton plays to the crowd to get their attention back. The RKO is countered with an enziguri but the second attempt connects for two. It feels like it’s been awhile since anyone kicked out of that. With the regular version not working, Orton loads up a super RKO but gets kicked out to the floor. That means a Phenomenal Forearm to the outside and the regular one finishes Orton at 16:17.

Rating: B-. This was about what you would have expected with good action between two talented veterans. AJ knowing that the RKO counter was coming was fine and the ending was as decisive as you could get with AJ surviving the RKO and winning clean. It’s a perfectly good match and it’s not like the two of them have anything else to do at the moment. Expect a rematch next month.

Lacey Evans cameo, though this time she stops to sneer at the crowd.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Ricochet/Aleister Black vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Rusev vs. The Bar

The Usos are defending. Jey and Black start things off but Sheamus tags himself in and low bridges Jey to the floor. Black gets taken down and it’s Rusev coming in to hold Black up for a kick from Rusev. It’s off to Ricochet with the springboard clothesline for two on Nakamura before spinning around Cesaro multiple times for a headscissors.

That just earns him a shot to the face and it’s time to swing Ricochet while Sheamus beats on Rusev’s chest. Nakamura tries to make a save so Sheamus beats on him as well, followed by the same to Jey and Black, all while Ricochet is swinging Ricochet for well over a minute. The Sharpshooter goes on with Jey making the save, earning himself a trip to the floor with his brother.

We settle down (kind of) to Black bringing in Ricochet, who gets caught by Rusev in a swinging release Rock Bottom. Everyone goes to the corner for the required Tower of Doom, with Ricochet rolling through because he’s Ricochet and more awesome than you. Black knees Sheamus down and Ricochet hits the 630 for two with a bunch of people diving in for the save. We get a parade of kicks to the face with Sheamus taking the double superkick. The Double Us retains the Usos’ titles at 10:05.

Rating: C+. The big spots helped a lot here and it felt like an amped up Smackdown match, which is one of the best things that you can have in this situation. There’s no other way you can go with no story and the match being thrown together on Smackdown. Just have them do the spots and do the best they can, like Ricochet sticking the landing and that insane swing.

Recap of the Hall of Fame.

Honky Tonk Man (Long overdue)

Harlem Heat (More than deserved)

Torrie Wilson (The bar has been lowered)

Brutus Beefcake (Sure why not)

Hart Foundation (Yep, and may I add yep)

Sue Aitchison, with John Cena’s 600th Make-A-Wish (Nothing wrong with that)

D-Generation X (Fine, though they feel weak for headliners)

We recap Shane McMahon vs. The Miz in the feud that WWE cares about and thinks we do too. Miz’s dad is a horrible person and only cared about his son when Miz started teaming with Shane, who didn’t like having to fix Miz’s daddy issues. Tonight it’s Falls Count Anywhere to blow it off.

Shane McMahon vs. The Miz

Falls Count Anywhere. Shane makes Greg Hamilton do his entrance three times, with the third being held out extra long. Miz’s dad is in the front row so Shane goes straight to the floor to choke him. The chase is on but Shane gets in a monitor shot to the head. The big elbow through the announcers’ table is loaded up so Miz’s dad gets in the way. Still doesn’t help the fact that he’s a horrible father.

Dad gets in the ring and puts up his fists so Shane jumps him. The beating brings Miz back into the ring to take Shane apart and send him into the barricade before checking on his dad. With the medics taking care of Papa Miz, Miz tackles Shane over the barricade and they head into the crowd, eventually going to the tech arena near one of the towers that holds up the structure above the ring. They go into an open area of the crowd with Miz hitting Shane in the foot with a chair.

Another shot to the back lets Miz knock Shane over to the international commentators station where tables are overturned. A chokeslam puts Shane through the table for two and a monitor shot knocks Shane over a barricade and down into the shadows (cool visual). Miz follows and gets a delayed two as replays show Shane landing on top of a golf cart.

They fight up a camera tower ala HHH vs. Undertaker at Wrestlemania XVII with Miz hitting a Skull Crushing Finale onto a metal platform for two. Shane gets in a shot to the face and climbs to the top of the tower as this isn’t going to go well. Miz follows him up and gets rather stalkerish as he stares Shane down to one knee. Shane begs off so Miz hammers away and suplexes him off the tower onto a crashpad….with Shane landing on top for the pin at 15:38.

Rating: C-. Why not. Why not. WHY THE #$**#%%!!@# NOT! Why shouldn’t we spend five months building this up and giving Shane McMahon a title before having him win at Wrestlemania? I’m sure this will continue, because going from November until April isn’t long enough for a Shane McMahon story. That’s just great.

The match itself was your usual walking around the stadium fight with Miz dominating through most of it until the end. The deal with Miz’s dad was a cool moment but they should have brought him out later on in the match instead of so close to the beginning. Not bad overall, but the ending was stupid.

Paige joins commentary.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Boss N Hug Connection vs. Natalya/Beth Phoenix vs. IIconics vs. Nia Jax/Tamina

Bayley and Sasha Banks are defending. The IIconics are a devil (Billie) and a black winged angel (Peyton). Natalya and Beth are in matching pink and black so here’s Bret Hart to stand with them on the stage and then go to the back. It’s a brawl to start with Nia being sent into the steps. We settle down to Peyton getting beaten up but Billie helps her out, allowing them to hit their superhero pose.

Beth gets bulldogged onto Billie’s knee with the kickout making Peyton scream. Natalya comes in for a Hart Attack for two on Billie with Bayley making the save. It’s off to Sasha, who is taken down without too much effort. Natalya and Beth lift Sasha into the air so Bayley makes the save and throws Bayley at Beth for the Bank Statement but Beth powers out as you probably expected.

Natalya puts Bayley and Sasha in the Sharpshooter at the same time until Tamina breaks it up with a superkick. Nia gets back in and starts crushing people, setting up Nia and Tamina going up top at the same time. Beth saves Banks from death by shoving Nia off and Sasha drops the frog splash for two on Natalya. Beth is back up and takes Bayley to the top for a super Glam Slam….but Billie comes in and steals the pin and the title at 10:46.

Rating: D. Some of the spots were good but at the same time, there were too many people running around and it hurt things a lot. I do like the IIconics coming in and stealing the belts as it certainly fits their style better (Do they even have a regular finisher?). But yeah, just too much going on when it didn’t need to be the case. Drop Beth and Natalya and it would have fit better, but I guess the Beth Phoenix fan club needed one more moment?

The helicopter pilots from earlier are here.

We recap Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan. Kingston has basically done everything there is to do in the company outside of winning the World Title. He got close in the Elimination Chamber but couldn’t quite pull it off. Vince McMahon then decided to throw one challenge after another at him with Kofi coming up just short every time until Big E. and Xavier Woods won a tag team gauntlet match to get him the title shot. If Kofi doesn’t win here, I don’t know if he ever will.

Smackdown World Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan

Kofi is challenging with New Day in his corner while Bryan has Rowan. Big E. has a present for Kofi, but only after he wins. They go to the mat to start with Kofi sticking the landing off a monkey flip to send Bryan outside. That means the big dive over the top as the roster is watching in the locker room again, where there is a total of one single monitor showing the match. Back in and Kofi tries to jump a little too much, allowing Bryan to pull him down into a surfboard.

Some forearms to the back of the head seem to wake Kofi up and it’s a clothesline into the Boom Drop. Bryan bails outside and Kofi dives after, only to crash onto the announcers’ table ribs first. Back in and we hit the waistlock for a good while as Bryan stays on the ribs. He switches over to the Boston crab, eventually stepping to the side to make it half Liontamer. With that broken, Bryan loads up a belly to back superplex but gets elbowed down three times in a row.

Kofi drops a top rope splash to the back for two but the ribs are banged up again in the process. Trouble in Paradise misses and they go to some rollups for near falls until Kofi kicks him in the head. Bryan stops him with a stomp out of the corner and busts out the YES pose for a nice callback. The running knee is countered into a rollup and SOS gets two but Bryan reverses into the LeBell Lock in the middle of the ring.

The long crawl gets Kofi’s leg on the rope and Bryan is starting to get mad. The kicks to the ribs have Kofi in trouble but he fires back kicks of his own, capped off by a reverse suplex (ok then) for a close two. Rowan goes after New Day but Kofi hits him with Trouble in Paradise, followed by the Midnight Hour on the floor. Bryan’s suicide dive is countered by a right hand but Trouble in Paradise misses, allowing Bryan to hit the running knee for two, causing the fans to build a roof on the stadium and then blow it off.

Bryan has had it and starts stomping the head as Woods and Big E. watch on. The LeBell Lock goes on and the referee checks the arm….which stays up. Bryan hits him in the face and pulls again but Kofi rolls out and hammers away at Bryan, who won’t let go of Kofi’s hand. That lets Kofi stomp away for a change and Bryan is done, setting up Trouble in Paradise to give Kofi the pin and the title at 23:41.

Rating: A-. I mean….they could have gone out there and demonstrated how to make a pimento loaf and it wouldn’t have mattered as long as they had that ending. That was a genuine Wrestlemania moment and you could feel what it meant to everyone. This was incredible and one of the best moments they could have had. Eleven years ago, Kofi had the worst debut match I’ve ever seen and now he’s WWE Champion at Wrestlemania. Not too shabby.

Post match Woods pulls off the cover and unveils the non-wooden title so Kofi can pose with the right design, already complete with custom side plates. Kofi’s kids come in to celebrate and now it’s time to open the present. It’s a new New Day shirt with Kofi holding the title.

We recap the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal.

Bliss, now in a different outfit, goes in to see Jost and Che as they’re checked for injuries. She says don’t worry because they’re in good hands….because Scott Hall and Kevin Nash are the doctors? And giving them prostate exams? Am I missing a joke here?

Booker T. joins commentary.

US Title: Samoa Joe vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is challenging and I believe he’s dressed as Mysterio from Spider-Man. Joe goes straight at him and Rey hits a 619 in less than a minute. Rey’s wheelbarrow bulldog is countered into the Koquina Clutch….and Rey is out at 1:00. So I’m thinking he’s still a bit injured? Booker: “I DID ALL MY PREP WORK FOR THAT???”

Trailer for Batista’s new movie.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre. Reigns is back from leukemia and needed a first singles match. Drew took out both Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins and is promising to do the same to Reigns tonight.

Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre

McIntyre is played to the ring by the New York Police Department Bagpipe Band. Reigns lowers his head to start and gets kicked in the face but what looked to be a powerslam is escaped. That means a legdrop to the back of the head over the middle rope but Drew is right back with the Glasgow Kiss. The chinlock has Reigns in more trouble until Drew takes him outside for a suplex, thereby upping the total amount of trouble.

The reverse Alabama Slam gives Drew two and he tells Reigns he should have said no. A flipping slam off the top has Reigns down again as Drew tells him that he broke the Shield. The Future Shock (Drew: “THIS ONE IS FOR AMBROSE!”) is broken up so Drew slaps him in the face. A big boot sends Drew outside and it’s a Samoan drop on the floor. Back in and the jumping clothesline puts Drew down, followed by the Superman Punch to do it again. The spear finishes Drew at 10:10.

Rating: C-. Totally standard Raw main event with Drew trying but not having a prayer of winning. There’s only so much you can do when everything is against you like this and Drew tried as hard as he can. Just getting this spot is Drew’s big win of the night and that’s not the worst place to be. He’ll be back and do just fine because he’s that good.

Here’s Elias to play some drums rather well. Now he’s at a piano (teleporting from one to the other) and does quite splendidly there too. Now he’s in the middle of the ring with his guitar. Elias the drummer and Elias the piano player play him in and he continues to have chops. Piano and Drum take a bow and now guitar Elias is on his own. The fans sing a little OH WALK WITH ELIAS and Elias promises more versions of himself, including a harpsichord player. As he starts his song, a SPECIAL BULLETIN appears on screen showing….the 1932 World Series?

Babe Ruth calls his shot (yes he did) and hits a home run….and here’s John Cena to Basic Thuganomics. Well you know the Yankees gear is making his skin crawl. Cena says Elias got the worst deal because John Cena is about to turn heel. He feels like he’s watching one of his movies because this whole thing sucks.

Cena isn’t feeling it because this is a wasted wrestling experiment. Cena: “They call me the golden shovel so I’m about to bury your push.” He throws him some nuts and says there’s no AA today, but here’s an FU. Cena lays him out with the knuckles and plants him with the FU. This worked well as Cena is often at his best when he’s making fun of himself.

We recap Batista vs. HHH. Batista wanted one more match with HHH to end their careers on his terms so he beat up Ric Flair to get HHH’s attention. The match is on and it’s No Holds Barred.

Shawn Michaels is on commentary.

Batista vs. HHH

No Holds Barred with HHH’s career on the line. Batista slips through the ropes on the way into the ring before heading outside to glare at Shawn. He even walks around the ring and does his entrance again, this time without the slipping. HHH’s entrance video seems to be inspired by Mad Max and shows a road race. The stage opens up and the car drives out with HHH on the back. I’ve seen worse.

Batista drives him into the corner to start but gets elbowed out to the floor. They fight to the floor with HHH going over the announcers’ table but managing to pull out a tool box to hit Batista in the head. Now it’s a chain to whip Batista in the back and choke a bit before going for some pliers. Batista’s finger gets bent back and HHH stomps on the pliers to make it even worse. Now it’s time for some needle nose pliers, but first he sits in a chair on Batista’s throat. HHH: “THAT’S A NICE NOSE RING!” And then he rips it out with the pliers!

Graves: “Batista won’t be able to be a guardian of the house like this! This guy is my boss!” Batista heads to the floor (Shawn: “His nose is bleeding!” Graves: “YOU THINK???”) and drops HHH onto the announcers’ table three times in a row without breaking the thing. Some chairs to the back keep HHH in trouble and they head back inside with Batista busting out a White Noise of all things.

Back to the floor with Batista putting the steps onto an announcers’ table and clearing off a second one, complete with a point to Shawn. The Batista Bomb off the steps is countered with a backdrop and the table STILL doesn’t break. Good grief where have those tables been all these years? HHH gets up, throws a crotch chop, and spears Batista through the German table. They slowly get back inside and HHH (eventually) finds a sledgehammer.

That just earns him a spear for two but a charge with the hammer is cut off by HHH’s raised boot. The spinebuster connects and it’s time for the Batista Bomb, with HHH dropping the hammer on his way down. That gets two and Batista brings the steps inside. He takes too long punching in the corner (right in front of the steps because wrestlers never learn) and gets powerbombed down onto the steps.

The Pedigree….only gets two as this keeps going. Batista gets in a DDT onto the steps and things stop again but here’s Ric Flair (I was waiting on him) to hand HHH a sledgehammer. HE COULDN’T DO THIS TEN MINUTES AGO??? HHH uses the steps to launch into a sledgehammer shot to the head but Batista pops back up so he can eat the Pedigree for the pin at 24:49. You know, because a JUMPING HAMMER TO THE HEAD isn’t enough to pin someone.

Rating: D+. The first ten minutes of this was very good but, as tends to be the case for almost any HHH match anymore, it went on too long because there was way too much laying around between moves. The ending looked ridiculous as well but that’s another situation. What they did early on was entertaining and brutal (that pliers thing was nuts) but I was looking at the clock near the end, which happens way too often.

Alexa Bliss (outfit #3) has the B Team model AND STILL CHAMPION Daniel Bryan shirts. Ron Simmons comes in for the cameo.

JBL joins commentary.

Kurt Angle vs. Baron Corbin

No Angle video package? Angle snaps off a belly to belly suplex but gets taken down early on. The rolling German suplexes give Kurt two but the Angle Slam is broken up for a big boot. The ankle lock is countered into Deep Six for two and Corbin is already getting frustrated. Kurt hits the Angle Slam for two but Corbin is right back and says You Can’t See Me. That odd taunt lets Angle roll some more German suplexes….and Kurt goes up. The moonsault misses as it always does…and the End of Days gives Corbin the pin at 6:00.

Rating: F. The idea of Kurt Angle losing to Baron Corbin in his last match is a failure. Not because it’s Angle last match. Not because the match wasn’t good. Not because WHY? But because we now have to deal with more Baron Corbin on Raw as more fans’ heads explode as we try to figure out what WWE sees in him. I’m sure this was Angle’s decision and while I can respect that, someone named McMahon should have overridden him.

Post match Angle wants his music played one last time so we can get in one more YOU SUCK. That’s exactly what he gets, as he should.

Intercontinental Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Finn Balor

Lashley, with special contacts in, is defending and Balor is the Demon, making its Wrestlemania debut. Balor hits a spinwheel kick and ax kick to the back, followed by a dropkick to put him on the floor. There’s the big flip dive but Lashley catches him with a spinebuster back inside. Lashley hits a heck of a spear through the ropes to drive Balor to the floor, followed by a regular one for two back inside. Balor gets back up and powerbombs Lashley (good one too) and the Coup de Grace gives Balor the title back at 4:04.

Rating: C. The spots were good (that spear was awesome) and the powerbomb looked awesome, but the problem is they didn’t need to do the Demon here. I get why they did it and it makes sense to do it at Wrestlemania, but at the same time what’s the point in having him do it if he can already beat Lashley and Lio Rush? It’s a good enough match, but this story was them trading the title and then the Demon doing what regular Balor could do.

Alexa (#4) announces the new WWE attendance record of 82,265. She thinks we need a break though so here are R-Truth and Carmella for the world’s largest dance break.

Wrestlemania XXXVI is in Tampa Bay on April 5, 2020.

We recap the women’s triple threat match. Becky Lynch has become the people’s champion, Charlotte is the Smackdown Women’s Champion and the corporate pick and Ronda Rousey is the Raw Women Champion and the unstoppable force. Tonight is winner take all for both belts, but it’s much more about the history because the match is actually headlining the show.

Raw Women’s Title/Smackdown Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch

Ronda is Raw Women’s Champion and Charlotte is Smackdown Women’s Champion….and she comes in via helicopter and lands in the parking lot, where a red carpet is rolled out for her in a Horseman homage. Since she has to walk a good ways into the stadium, here are Joan Jett and the Blackhearts to play Ronda to the ring. The bell rings at 12:01am and Becky goes straight for the Disarm-Her on Ronda but gets shoved away so they can all head outside.

That means a Piper’s Pit for both of them and Ronda starts the trash talk. Charlotte gets up and sends Rousey into the barricade, setting up a showdown with Charlotte inside. The Disarm-Her to Becky is broken up and it’s Ronda coming back in to kick Becky in the face. A double powerbomb over the top is countered into a double armbar on Becky and Charlotte. Becky escapes and dropkicks Ronda to the floor for a NASTY crash on her back. Charlotte Downward Spirals Becky into the buckle for two as we look at Rousey landing square on her back again.

Becky is right back with the Disarm-Her but Ronda comes back to life and makes the save. A running knee breaks up the armbar on Becky and Charlotte hits a double Natural Selection for two each. Becky gets sent outside so Charlotte chops Ronda, who tells her to bring it. That’s just what Charlotte does with a backhand to the face so Ronda hits a jumping knee, which is countered into a Liontamer. Becky breaks it up with a bulldog and hits a double DDT for two each.

A super Bexploder gets two on Charlotte, setting up a double high crossbody from Rousey. The double armbar is countered with a double powerbomb Ronda is done for the moment. Becky calls Charlotte to her and avoids a charge, letting Becky kick her to the floor. The Disarm-Her goes on and Rousey uses the ropes to stand up for the break. A missed charge lets Becky get the Disarm-Her in the corner until Charlotte’s big boot breaks it up.

Charlotte starts in on Rousey’s knee and gets the Figure Four but Becky comes off the top with a legdrop for the save. And now, a table because that’s what this match was calling for. Rousey breaks up a powerbomb through the table and turns the table over, saying tables are for b****** (at least the third time she’s used that word so far). Charlotte comes back in for a double spear as Cole’s voice is almost gone.

The table is set up in the corner and Charlotte gets two off a spear to Becky. Rousey gets back up and helps Becky drive Charlotte somewhat through the table to knock her outside. The fight is on and Rousey goes with a Shining Wizard and tries Piper’s Pit….but gets reversed into a crucifix to give Becky the pin and the titles at 22:27!

Rating: B. The ending was straight out of Angle vs. Benoit at Wrestlemania XVII with the submission attempts all match until the quick pinfall. What matters here is Becky defeated Rousey to win the titles as she should have. That was how this show needed to end and it did, even if the ending could have been a bit smoother. Charlotte will be fine and I’m curious to see who goes after Becky as the first victim.

Replays show Rousey’s shoulders were WAY up so there’s your story going forward (if Rousey sticks around). Cole: “Tonight will forever be known as WrestleMANia!” Oh just stop dude. Pyro and posing takes us out.

Overall Rating: B-. Let’s get the things I got wrong out of the way first. First: this was WAY better than I was expecting after last year’s near nightmare of a show. Second: they actually did give us three happy endings, which I said several times would not happen. I’m very glad to be wrong on that, but I certainly was wrong. Third: yeah HHH vs. Batista went on too long and it brought things down. I had high hopes and they didn’t come through.

Now for the good stuff: the right people won (mostly) and the big matches all went to the right people. For the first time in way too long, we had something to cheer about. If that’s it for Lesnar at the moment, thank goodness because he needs to go away for a long time and leave the title here. Rollins will be fine as champion for the summer before someone wins Money in the Bank and takes it from him (It’s going to be Corbin isn’t it?). Becky winning was the right way to go also, even if the ending was a little rushed. There’s one big one left though.

Kofi Kingston is WWE Champion. That was one of the best moments I’ve seen WWE put on in years and might pass Bryan in New Orleans. It felt special and you don’t get that often enough, mainly because there was serious doubt if they could actually pull the trigger. I loved that moment and was happier than I’ve been at something in a long time. I’d have loved to see it close the show, but I get why they couldn’t go there. Incredible moment though.

Overall, the pacing was FAR better than what they’ve had in recent years and while there was a lot of stuff they needed to trim down (despite having multiple matches go less than five minutes), it didn’t drag nearly as bad as it has before. It still needs to be shorter by about an hour (at least) and not everyone needs to be on the show, but for what we got, it was one of the better shows in recent memory and we got a genuine Wrestlemania moment. Well done, and it was close to being great.

Results

Seth Rollins b. Brock Lesnar – Stomp

AJ Styles b. Randy Orton – Phenomenal Forearm

Usos b. The Bar, Aleister Black/Ricochet and Shinsuke Nakamura/Rusev – Double Us to Sheamus

Shane McMahon b. The Miz – McMahon pinned Shane after a superplex off a camera tower

IIconics b. Boss N Hug Connection, Nia Jax/Tamina and Beth Phoenix/Natalya – Super Glam Slam to Bayley

Kofi Kingston b. Daniel Bryan – Trouble in Paradise

Samoa Joe b. Rey Mysterio – Koquina Clutch

Roman Reigns b. Drew McIntyre – Spear

HHH b. Batista – Pedigree

Baron Corbin b. Kurt Angle – End of Days

Finn Balor b. Bobby Lashley – Coup de Grace

Becky Lynch b. Ronda Rousey and Charlotte – Crucifix to Rousey

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXXI (2016 Redo): She’s Going Places

IMG Credit: WWE

Wrestlemania XXXI
Date: March 29, 2015
Location: Levi’s Stadium, Santa Clara, California
Attendance: 76,976
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

This is an interesting show as most people really weren’t looking forward to it. The card isn’t that bad on paper but the interest is still low. Reigns vs. Lesnar isn’t the most exciting main event and the idea of HHH vs. Sting as a regular match is borderline terrifying. The show has surprised me before though so let’s get to it.

The set is HUGE this year with a very wide stage and a big circle for the Titantron looking like a play button on the WWE Network. It’s another open air stadium and since it’s on the west coast, the sun is shining very brightly for a unique look.

Pre-Show: Tag Team Titles: Tyson Kidd/Cesaro vs. Los Matadores vs. Usos vs. New Day

One fall to a finish. Kidd and Cesaro, with Kidd’s wife Natalya, are defending and it’s Kofi Kingston/Big E. (minus the Langston) for New Day with Xavier Woods in their corner. The Usos (in San Francisco 49ers colors) have Jimmy’s wife Naomi and Los Matadores still have El Torito. Cesaro and Kofi start fighting with Kingston scoring a quick dropkick but Diego tags himself in.

A ticked off Cesaro pulls Jey off the apron and whips him into the barricade, re-aggravating a shoulder injury and taking Jey out. Kofi monkey flips Diego for two and gets punched in the face as Jey is being taken to the back. Back to Cesaro for a chinlock before the Swing sends Kofi into Kidd’s dropkick. Kofi gets kicked into the corner so Jimmy can tag himself in for a superkick to Cesaro.

Kidd, Fernando, Big E. and Cesaro are all down in a corner and Jimmy nails the running Umaga hip attack to each one of them. Kofi dives onto Diego as any semblance of the tagging has been abandoned. Kidd springboards into a superkick from Jimmy, who charges into an uppercut from Cesaro. Big E. comes in and launches Kofi into a double knee to Cesaro’s chest for two.

Cesaro’s apron superplex takes Big E. down and Los Matadores add a powerbomb/Backstabber combo to Kofi with Kidd breaking up the pin. Kofi goes after Kidd on the floor but has to catch Torito, allowing Natalya to put the bull in a Sharpshooter to continue a stupid mini feud. Jimmy and Naomi dive onto Kidd, Kofi and Fernando. Back in and the Midnight Hour (Big Ending from Big E. (a powerslam drop) and a middle rope DDT from Kofi) plants Diego with Jimmy and Cesaro making stereo saves.

Fernando switches with Diego for a rollup on Big E. but the referee says he’s not legal. If that’s true, I want to buy that referee a ham sandwich. Big E. picks up Diego and Kidd at the same time but Jimmy breaks it up with a superkick. Kidd eats Trouble in Paradise but Cesaro uppercuts Kofi on top. Los Matadores go up top for a double superplex but Cesaro and Big E. make it a double Tower of Doom. JBL: “OH THE HUMANITY!” Jimmy adds a Superfly splash to Big E. but Cesaro steals the pin at retain at 9:58.

Rating: B. Total and complete insanity here (described as a car wreck by the commentators) which was all it needed to be. They didn’t go with a copy of last year’s match, even though a lot of the participants were the same. Kidd and Cesaro were really clicking as a team and the division as a whole was looking up until Kidd’s injury in June.

Pre-Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Adam Rose, Alex Riley, Big E., Big Show, Bo Dallas, Cesaro, Curtis Axel, Damien Mizdow, Darren Young, Diego, Erick Rowan, Fandango, Fernando, Goldust, Heath Slater, Hideo Itami, Jack Swagger, Jimmy Uso, Kane, Kofi Kingston, Konnor, Mark Henry, Ryback, Sin Cara, The Miz, Titus O’Neil, Tyson Kidd, Viktor, Xavier Woods, Zack Ryder

Rose loves to party, Riley is back from injury, Axel is dressed like Hulk Hogan in a gimmick called Axelmania after he was never officially eliminated from the 2015 Royal Rumble, Dallas is a self-obsessed motivational speaker, Mizdow is Sandow copying the Miz as his stunt double (and becoming incredibly popular due to how hard he’s worked at the character), Itami is an NXT guy who won a tournament for this spot and Konnor and Viktor are a power team called the Ascension. The seven people from the opening match are surprise additions to this.

Axel breaks up the brawling to start so he can rip off his shirt, earning himself an elimination from the masses. Everyone keeps fighting until Rose and Fandango eliminate each other. Miz and Mizdow double team Riley and get rid of him with Miz taking the credit. Dallas eliminates Ryder, takes a victory lap, and then gets kicked out by Itami. The fans are way into him so here’s Big Show to eliminate Itami before anyone gets too excited.

Kane gets rid of Los Matadores at the same time and Cesaro does the same to Rose. Henry throws out Kidd but the ring is still WAY too full. Ascension gets rid of Henry and knocks Show down in a stupid move. Ryback dumps Ascension for their brilliance, followed by Young and Slater a few seconds after. Titus goes out too and it’s all Ryback, so Big Show is RIGHT THERE to cut him off.

Show clotheslines Swagger out and takes out all three members of New Day from the apron. You WILL respect Big Show and his amazing strength whether you like it or not. We’re down to Show, Rowan, Uso, Ryback, Cesaro, Goldust, Miz, Mizdow and Kane. The fans are behind Mizdow as Show dumps Rowan.

Ryback gets rid of Goldust but Kane saves Big Show for no logical reason. Miz and Mizdow take a double chokeslam from Kane, who is quickly slammed out by Cesaro. Show dumps Jimmy but gets picked up by Cesaro again, only to escape and dump Cesaro with ease. Ryback grabs a spinebuster on Show and is eliminated for trying to get any momentum.

It’s Miz, Mizdow and Show for the final three but Mizdow FINALLY stands up to Miz and tells him to go do it himself. Miz gets annoyed and yells at him for about a minute as Show just stands back and watch. Mizdow snaps and eliminates Miz and gets to fight Big Show on his own. Some clotheslines have the giant in trouble and Mizdow low bridges him halfway out. Show gets back up and shrugs off a front facelock before easily eliminating Mizdow at 18:08.

Rating: D. So yeah, all hail Big Show, may his name forever be praised, because he’s big and strong and bald and was here back in 1999 so we must give him a win. On top of that, they were trying to push the idea that Big Show had never won a battle royal, ignoring the one he won on Smackdown in 2014 and the one he won on Raw in 2006.

Instead of using this to make Mizdow into someone important, they went with Big Show because he just hasn’t won anything important in a long time. This was it for Mizdow as he would lose the big showdown with Miz less than a month later and pretty much disappear. Big Show on the other hand would do exactly the same thing he’s done for about the last ten years: be treated like a monster and then lose to someone new. Except here of course because Mizdow winning would have been stupid.

Aloe Blacc sings America the Beautiful.

The opening video is hosted by LL Cool J and talks about how entertainment has evolved with everyone being connected. The one thing that has stayed the same though is us as we’ve watched moment after moment in the history of Wrestlemania. That generation at the beginning created what we see today and connects us all together. Tonight, these men and women will take the biggest stage and connect us all. This is Wrestlemania. Cool stuff here and it worked very well.

Intercontinental Title: Daniel Bryan vs. Bad News Barrett vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Stardust vs. Luke Harper vs. R-Truth vs. Dean Ambrose

Ladder match and Barrett is defending after issuing a challenge for a bunch of people to fight him. Stardust is Cody Rhodes as an even freakier version of Goldust. Truth is scared of heights and is going to have some issues in this one. It’s a huge brawl to start and Ambrose takes Harper down with a suicide dive. Stardust jumps off the middle rope and lands on a bunch of people (the Falling Star), leaving Harper to dive on everyone but Ambrose.

Dean climbs a ladder and dives on the other six to put all seven of them down. Truth is the first one back in but he can’t bring himself to climb. It’s Barrett with the save but Bryan dropkicks a ladder into him before whipping Stardust into the ladder to crush Barrett even more. The momentum is stopped as Harper throws the ladder at Bryan but he’s able to tie Harper upside down in the ladder for the YES Kicks.

That earns Bryan a superkick from Ziggler and it’s Dean and Dolph going for a climb. Barrett joins them but Stardust takes out the ladder to put everyone down. The fans chant CODY to freak Stardust out so he throws a ladder at Harper. Stardust goes outside and pulls out his own ladder called the, and I quote, Exo-Atmospheric Starbird. In other words, it’s a ladder covered in glitter.

Barrett will have none of that and breaks a rung off to give Stardust a beating. Dean throws the glitter ladder at Barrett and the glitter falls all over the ring. Now it’s time to bring in two small ladders so Harper and Ambrose can have a duel, capped off by a boot to Dean’s face. Harper lays a smaller ladder on the top rope and rams Dean into it face first. The ladder around Luke’s head takes some people out but Truth drop toeholds Harper down, sending him into the ladder.

Truth sets up the big ladder but Stardust goes for the climb, only to get superplexed back down by Barrett. Bryan, Ziggler and Ambrose go up top until Dean drops down and shoves the ladder over. Dean goes up until Harper powerbombs him off the ladder and through a ladder bridged between the barricade and ring. Ziggler tries a sleeper on Harper as he climbs, followed by the Zig Zag to bring them crashing down.

Somehow Dolph is able to climb up, only to have Barrett pull him down into the Bull Hammer. Another one knocks Truth off but Bryan makes a quick climb and kicks Barrett down. Barrett is right back up though and makes a save, followed by a quick running knee from Bryan, allowing him to climb up, headbutt Ziggler off and win the title at 13:55.

Rating: B. Giving Bryan a title (the fifth different one he’s fought for in five years) is a good idea as it lets the fans get it out of their system with a feel good moment. If he hadn’t won here, the fans would have probably hijacked the show with their DANIEL BRYAN chants because if Bryan isn’t the featured attraction, there’s no way they can possibly enjoy the show. Some fans. Anyway, this was exactly what the match should have been: Money in the Bank but for a title. Unfortunately Bryan would get hurt again and be out of action in less than a month, putting him on the shelf indefinitely.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton. Rollins broke up the Shield last year and became the Authority’s young ace, which ticked Orton off. This led to a feud with Rollins putting Orton on the shelf (meaning onto a movie set) with a Curb Stomp onto some steps. Then Orton returned and rejoined the Authority for a few weeks, only to turn on them again and attack Rollins to set this up. After all that stupid, they went with a simpler idea: Orton as the original future of the WWE vs. Rollins as the new future.

Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton

Rollins is Mr. Money in the Bank and has Joey Mercury and Jamie Noble as his personal stooges. Seth starts by flipping away from Orton, only to eat a dropkick and bail to the floor from the threat of an RKO. Back in and a big clothesline looks to set up the RKO again but the Stooges offer a distraction to break it up. Orton deals with them early off a double elevated DDT from the apron.

The distraction lets Seth get in his first offense though and Orton is in trouble. A snap suplex gets two and we’re in the chinlock on Orton. Back up and Orton grabs a powerslam, followed by a t-bone suplex to send Rollins to the apron. As luck would have it, he’s in position for the elevated DDT but Seth pops up with an enziguri, followed by an Asai moonsault to put both guys on the floor.

Back in and Randy can’t get a superplex but he’ll settle for a top rope backdrop and a high cross body, only to have Seth roll through for two. A low superkick staggers Orton and Seth tries standing Sliced Bread #2, only to get caught in the RKO for a very close two. That’s a move you don’t see kicked out of very often. The Stooges break up the Punt to keep this PG, allowing Rollins to hit the Curb Stomp for two. Seth tries it again but this time Orton launches him into the air and catches him in the RKO for the pin at 13:15.

Rating: B. Good but not great here with the near falls off the false finishes not having the best heat in the world. That ending is more than worth it though and looked awesome with Orton being able to catch that thing from almost anywhere. Orton is the kind of guy that you can throw in there whenever you need a spot like this and the fans are going to freak out over the RKO every time, especially when it’s something like that. Good stuff.

Ronda Rousey is here.

We recap HHH vs. Sting, which started back at Survivor Series but Sting disappeared for a few months, as is his custom. Sting stood up against the Authority’s corruption so the Authority talked down to him for never being in the big pond before, because WCW’s legacy exists for WWE to stomp on it and beat their chest over the battle that ended fourteen years ago. This turned into a big thing about the Monday Night Wars with Sting being the last soldier from WCW that had to be vanquished.

As a side note, here’s a great example of why Stephanie gets on people’s nerves. On one of the last shows before this match, Sting came out to say that this shouldn’t be about the Monday Night Wars because that would be totally ridiculous. This brought out Stephanie, to insist that it WAS about the Monday Night Wars and barely letting Sting get in another word, because she had spoken and that’s all that mattered.

HHH vs. Sting

No DQ or countout. Sting is played to the ring by some kind of Japanese band with drums and a gong. As you might expect, HHH completely upstages him with a full on Terminator commercial with the robots rising from the stage, a clip from the movie, HHH dressed as a Terminator and Arnold Schwarzenegger himself appearing on screen for the introduction. It might be time to call in Robocop.

They lock up after forty five seconds and a shoulder drops HHH for more stalling. A hiptoss and dropkick put HHH in the corner and Sting is looking better than he has in years. Fans: “YOU STILL GOT IT!” HHH’s right hands and facebuster have little effect as Sting goes for the Scorpion Deathlock (basically a Sharpshooter), sending HHH bailing to the floor. HHH comes back in but gets whipped over the corner as this has been one sided for the first five minutes.

Sting goes to the floor though and the Stinger Splash hits the barricade by mistake, as it’s done all but roughly twice in his career. Back in and HHH whips him across the ring several times until Sting collapses. We hit the chinlock to slow things down again before HHH goes to the middle rope for some reason. He dives into the Scorpion and here’s DX (X-Pac and the New Age Outlaws) for the save.

Sting fights them off with ease and backdrops HHH onto them, setting up a dive off the top (remember that Sting is 56 here) to take them all out. Back in and a Pedigree gets two so HHH gets the sledgehammer (one of at least two under the ring). This brings out the NWO (Hall, Nash and Hogan) to save Sting (SO much wrong with that statement, not even counting trying to remember if the Kliq exists in storylines or not). They take their sweet time and eventually clean house, allowing Sting to hit the Scorpion Death Drop (reverse DDT) for two.

Now the Deathlock goes on and Hogan pulls the sledgehammer away. Gunn takes Nash down and Nash is holding his leg in what almost has to be a rib. Sting tries to put the hold back on but Shawn Michaels runs in for Sweet Chin Music (well the area a few inches in front of the chin that is). HHH only gets two and both guys are done. Shawn hands HHH the hammer but Hall gives Sting a bat for the awesome duel. HHH’s hammer is broken over the bat and Sting pounds away in the corner, only to dive into the sledgehammer to the face for the pin at 18:35.

Rating: B-. This was a blast until the ending which I really didn’t want to see. Of course the quality here was bad but they were never going to get a good match out there so why not just go for the big circus act? I know the logic is that you can’t have Sting come in and beat HHH because he was WCW, but again, IT WAS FOURTEEN YEARS AGO.

Why does anything about the other company matter anymore? Sting came in as a big, fun moment and then it’s HAHA HHH WINS AGAIN! To be fair though, this was his first Wrestlemania win in five years so it’s not like it happens often. Still though, fun stuff but the ending was a punch to the stomach.

Post match HHH shakes Sting’s hand. As in the guy he hit in the face with a hammer two minutes ago. This doesn’t make any sense as HHH is still the corrupt villain, meaning Sting’s original mission should be ongoing. Forget all that though as this was one more rehash of the Monday Night Wars because people still care about that.

Ads for new shows coming to the WWE Network, including the new Divas Search.

Maria Menunos, in a Bushwhackers shirt, brings in Daniel Bryan. First ever Intercontinental Champion Pat Patterson comes in to congratulate him, as do Roddy Piper, Ricky Steamboat, Ric Flair (of course) and Bret Hart, who starts a YES chant. Ron Simmons comes in and scares them all before hitting his catchphrase.

Skylar Grey, Kid Ink and Travis Barker perform the theme songs. Thankfully it wasn’t a full on medley.

AJ Lee/Paige vs. Bella Twins

Real people vs. reality stars (from Total Divas), even though Paige had already become a cast member. Nikki is Divas Champion and in the middle of her reign of doom. Paige debuted at the Raw after Wrestlemania last year and has formed a dream team with AJ to take on the sisters.

Nikki and Paige have a catfight to start with the champ getting the better of it and knocking AJ off the apron. An Alabama Slam gets two on off an Alabama Slam. Brie comes in with a middle rope missile dropkick as the announcers debate the importance of the women not on Total Divas. AJ gets knocked off the apron again and Brie’s running knee to Paige gets two.

Back to Nikki who drops AJ for the third time, followed by the Rack Attack for two on Paige. They’re even kicking out of the finishers in midcard matches now. Paige superkicks Nikki down and both Bellas wind up on the floor, setting up Paige’s flip dive off the apron. The hot tag FINALLY brings in AJ who is quickly slammed down for two but Brie has to save Nikki from the Black Widow. Nikki forearms AJ for two more, only to get caught in the Black Widow for the submission at 6:42.

Rating: C-. This was a handicap match for the first half with Paige cleaning house, which was made even weirder when AJ came in anyway. Not that it mattered though as the Bellas were going to be pushed as the stars as long as they wanted to because of that stupid reality show. In theory this should have set up AJ as the next challenger but she retired later in the week and left the company for good.

We get a tale of the tape for Lesnar vs. Reigns, which Cole says is the result of a computer analysis. The stats include height, weight and career accomplishments. Did this computer analysis take place in the Korean War?

Hall of Fame video, with highlights of Lanny Poffo reading a poem to induct his brother Randy Savage and Connor Michalek receiving the first Warrior Award.

The Class of 2015 includes Rikishi, Larry Zbyszko (mainly famous in the 80s), Alundra Blayze, Connor Michalek, the Bushwhackers (with Butch on crutches but still doing the strut), Tatsumi Fujinami (a legendary Japanese wrestler), Randy Savage (represented by his brother), Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Kevin Nash (for the required Kliq member, though I wonder why he can go in under his real name and not Hall).

We recap John Cena vs. Rusev for the US Title. Rusev, an evil Bulgarian/Russian, won the title late last year and is undefeated. He’s run through all kinds of American stars and even beat Cena via knockout at Fast Lane 2015. Tonight is the big rematch (as granted by Rusev’s manager Lana to plant the seeds for their split) and showdown for the title. This is one of those stories that worked for years and is still working now because it’s such a simple idea.

US Title: Rusev vs. John Cena

Cena is challenging. Rusev’s entrance trumps everything tonight as the Russian military accompanies Lana to the ring before Rusev rolls out IN A TANK. This is so Rocky IV. Cena has a video montage of Presidents of the United States talking about American exceptionalism until Cena walks out. The fans do the always awesome JOHN CENA SUCKS chant to the tune of his music.

The champ spinwheel kicks the American down to start and dives at Cena for a gutwrench suplex (from Rusev in a cool move) for two. A Cannonball in the corner gets the same but Rusev stops to wave the Russian flag. You don’t do that to a real American so Cena kicks him in the face and starts his way too early finishing sequence. The top rope Fameasser gets two but the fans are too busy cheering for Lana to care.

The AA is broken up and a jumping superkick drops Cena cold. Rusev argues with the referee though and Cena hooks a tornado DDT for two more. A quick Alabama Slam (that’s how you do it Nikki) looks to set up the Accolade (Rusev’s camel clutch finisher) but Cena pulls him down into the STF. As Cena does some of the loudest instructing I’ve ever heard (telling Rusev to keep his head up), Lana throws in a shoe for a distraction so Rusev can make the ropes. Seriously, a shoe? You couldn’t like, go yell at him or something? At least it was rather heelish.

Rusev throws him down with a fall away slam, followed by a top rope headbutt of all things for two. He can’t quite get the Accolade though, allowing Cena to kick him away and debut the springboard Stunner for two of his own. Another jumping superkick and a wheelbarrow slam set up the Accolade and the fans are THRILLED. This time Cena powers out and grabs the STF. Lana offers another distraction but Rusev rams into her by mistake, setting up the AA to give Cena the title at 14:43.

Rating: C+. It’s cool to see Cena drop down the card like this as he’s been in the main event for so long now that it’s hard to get into seeing him win the World Title again. The match was good enough even if there was an obvious ending but the Accolade could have stayed on longer. Rusev was built up to lose at a match like this and there’s nothing wrong with that. It would have been interesting to see Rusev escape again here though and have Cena chase him over the summer.

Rusev blames Lana for the loss.

Wrestlemania XXXII is in Dallas.

The pre-show panel talks about the Tag Team Title match and Big Show winning the battle royal. Thanks for reminding me.

Here are HHH and Stephanie to brag about the new attendance record and desperately fill in some time as we have two matches left and nearly an hour and a half to go. Stephanie talks about watching Wrestlemania I live and seeing her friend Andre the Giant (This was a thing for her around this time as she would mention this whenever she could. For some reason this was her justification for not letting Cena be in the Andre battle royal.).

Wrestlemania has grown exponentially since then and it’s all because of the Authority’s leadership. HHH says it’s like he beat everyone here tonight, just like he beat Sting (Buy a ticket, get a hammer to the face!). They own everyone here because the Authority wins. That means they own the people and that means it’s time for the Rock. Cole says Rock has headlined five Wrestlemanias. Are they really still going with the idea that Rock vs. Hogan wasn’t the headliner?

The fans keep cheering until Stephanie asks them to be quiet because we get the idea. Rock tells Stephanie that she doesn’t own the people here, including himself because he was born right around here. As for HHH, he can either go dress up as the Terminator again or they can make a Wrestlemania moment right here and right now. HHH doesn’t seem interested so, just like Rock left his heart in San Francisco, HHH clearly left something back in Connecticut.

Stephanie gets in Rock’s face and says he knows there’s no Rock without the McMahons. Rock’s dad Rocky Johnson would be nowhere without Vince Sr., Vince Jr. and Stephanie. That starts a chant for Shane, which even Cole acknowledges. Rock says that Stephanie would be nowhere without Vince so she slaps him. Stephanie keeps ranting as Rock goes outside……and stands next to Ronda Rousey. Fans: “RONDA’S GONNA KILL YOU!” Rock introduces her to Stephanie but Stephanie says they’re friends already.

Stephanie KEEPS GOING and says this is her ring. Ronda says any ring she steps into is hers so Stephanie can make her leave. Stephanie smiles at her but Rousey gives her a look, which Rock sums up as meaning “she’s going to reach down your throat, pull out your insides and play jump rope with your Fallopian tubes.” HHH tries to interrupt and gets beaten down, including a hiptoss from Rousey. Stephanie loads up the slap but gets her arm bent back with as little force as possible, likely due to UFC contract stipulations. Rousey and Rock stand tall.

There’s no time to recap Bray Wyatt vs. Undertaker but it’s what you would expect: Bray wants to be the new evil monster and Undertaker stands in his way. The interesting note here is Bray sprained the heck out of his ankle earlier in the day so he’s nowhere near 100%.

Bray Wyatt vs. Undertaker

The awesome entrances continue (well as awesome as a guy holding a lantern when it’s still daylight can be) as Bray walks down the ramp and passes a string of zombies who come to life as he goes by. Undertaker has grown some hair back and looks like he did in 2002. Bray charges into a boot before the bell, though that might be all that ankle can handle for the match.

Some driving shoulders set up Old School (notice that Undertaker’s offense here keeps Bray from having to stand alone) but a running clothesline puts Undertaker on the floor. He lands on his feet though and pulls Bray out to keep up the beating. The apron legdrop staggers Bray even more but he breaks up the big boot with his running cross body. Bray takes his time pounding Undertaker down which makes sense coming from him.

The ankle is fine enough for a running splash in the corner but Bray drops down and puts on a chinlock. For someone as banged up as he is, this is a solid performance from Wyatt. Undertaker’s head is rammed into the post but Bray goes down and holds his ankle. I don’t know why they didn’t do a quick angle during the match to explain the injury. Back in and Bray can’t stand at first.

Undertaker grabs Hell’s Gate but Bray punches his way out before it goes on full. A release Rock Bottom sets up the backsplash for two on Undertaker. Sister Abigail is countered into a chokeslam followed by a Tombstone for two. These near falls are WAY past overdone so far tonight. Another Tombstone is countered into Sister Abigail to freak Bray out even more. Bray does his spider bridge up but Undertaker sits up and glares into Wyatt’s eyes, sending Bray wilting to the mat in a perfect reaction. Bray actually wins a slugout but Sister Abigail is countered into a second Tombstone to give Undertaker the pin at 15:06.

Rating: C+. This match told me a few things. First and foremost, last year’s match was so bad because of the injury. Undertaker looked like his old (emphasis on that word) self here and was nowhere near as off as he was last year. Unfortunately it also tells me that Bray isn’t going to move up the card any time soon.

With the Streak over there’s no real reason for Undertaker to win here, other than to give the fans a feel good moment. Bray was trying as hard as he could on one leg but he could only get so far. Finally, Undertaker is missing something now that the Streak is gone. 21-1 still sounds impressive but it’s just not the same.

Ad for Extreme Rules.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar. Brock has been unstoppable lately after squashing Cena to win the title at Summerslam 2014. Reigns won the Royal Rumble to earn the shot, despite being LOATHED by the crowd at this point. The idea became about him trying to honor his family’s history and legacy which worked to a degree, but no matter what they did, it was still Brock Lesnar on the other side and people wanted to see him massacre Reigns in every way he could think of.

The other problem for Reigns is he hasn’t really earned the spot. Aside from the Rumble, his only major win was last month over Daniel Bryan. This really wasn’t the strongest build in the world and is boiling down to Brock suplexes a lot and Reigns hits him a lot. Roman has been told he can’t beat Brock and his motivation is to prove him wrong. That’s the extent of his motivation and that’s not enough for the main event of Wrestlemania.

WWE World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Brock is defending of course. We do the big match intros and Reigns is booed out of the building, following by the fans to quote Heyman’s intro along with him. Roman goes right at Brock to start but gets driven into the corner, setting up the first German suplex. Brock is already bleeding but he hits the F5 inside of thirty seconds. A release fisherman’s suplex sends Reigns flying but he elbows out of a German, drawing incredible booing from the crowd.

Brock no sells a clothesline and now the German sends Reigns across the ring again. Reigns smiles at Brock, earning himself a belly to back suplex and Brock debuting the “SUPLEX CITY” line. Right hands don’t bother Brock either as another German drops Reigns again. Roman keeps smiling so Brock breaks it up with a release German. The fans think this is awesome as Brock forearms Reigns off the apron and into the barricade. As he gets back in, Reigns scores with a knee to the ribs, followed by some kicks to the face but Brock catches a foot and knocks Reigns silly with a clothesline.

A belly to belly overhead brings Reigns back in over the top rope but Reigns shakes his head at Brock again. Another F5 gets two and now Brock take the gloves off. Some hard slaps put Reigns down but he tells Brock to bring it on. Another German earns him another bring it on so Brock gives him suplex number ten. The third F5 gets two more, putting Reigns past Undertaker last year. Brock takes Roman outside but Reigns posts him, drawing some real blood from Lesnar.

Back in and Brock is wobbly so Roman its two straight Superman Punches. That gets him to a knee but Reigns has to elbow out of another German. The third Superman Punch puts Brock down and there’s the spear. Brock is up though so a second spear gets a VERY close two. Heyman is on his knees praying as the fans are booing Roman even more. A fourth Superman Punch is countered into a fourth F5…….AND HERE COMES SETH ROLLINS TO CASH IN MONEY IN THE BANK!

WWE World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins

The Curb Stomp puts Brock down but Reigns has to spear Brock down to save Seth from an F5. Another Curb Stomp (and a whisper of “thank you so much” to Reigns) gives Seth the title at 16:43!

Rating: A-. They went in a TOTALLY different direction here and it was the best thing they possibly could have done. Reigns vs. Lesnar had little interest as a match but as a one sided war with Reigns giving it everything he had near the end, they turned it into one of the most dramatic spectacles you could find. They had me on the near fall after that second spear and I lost it when Rollins came out.

That ending was a stroke of brilliance as they didn’t want to job Lesnar but they didn’t want to give Reigns the title yet. Rollins had been the wrestler of the year in 2014 and it made much better sense to give him the credit that he deserved for it here. Great drama, great action, and a way better match that it had any right to be.

Fireworks and posing take us out.

Overall Rating: B+. I actually liked this show a lot more live, which probably had a lot to do with the expectations being so low coming in. With more time to think about it and the shock of the cash in being gone, it’s still a really strong show that FAR exceeded expectations. The main event was great and most of the other stuff was good. Aside from the main event there really isn’t a big blow away match though and that hurts things a bit.

The entire show was set up differently this year as there were very few backstage segments and the show was able to fly by otherwise. However, there was that big twenty plus minute segment with Rock/HHH/Stephanie and that’s what caused a big part of this show’s problem: it’s too long.

Counting the two hour pre-show and it’s nearly thirty minutes of wrestling, this show runs nearly six hours. It doesn’t matter if it’s the greatest show you’ve ever watched; that’s too long. There had to be something that could be cut in here (hint: it was the long part that didn’t involve a match), even though none of the matches broke twenty minutes. Between the big talking segment and the live performance, which still adds nothing to the show, there’s too much in here and it makes for a very long sit.

Overall though, this was a major surprise and a better show than it had any right to be. The low expectations helped it a lot, but this was looking like one of the worst Wrestlemanias in history and wound up being a lot of fun. Nothing on it really stands out above the rest (save for maybe the main event) so the whole is greater than the sum of all its parts. Really fun show here.

Ratings Comparison

New Day vs. Los Matadores vs. Usos vs. Cesaro/Tyson Kidd

Original: C+

Redo: B

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D+

Redo: D

Intercontinental Title Ladder Match

Original: B

Redo: B

Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

Redo: B

Sting vs. HHH

Original: B

Redo: B-

Paige/AJ Lee vs. Bella Twins

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Rusev vs. John Cena

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Bray Wyatt vs. Undertaker

Original: B

Redo: C+

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: B+

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: B+

Yeah the shock had a lot to do with it but there was good stuff throughout.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/03/29/wrestlemania-xxxi-shock-and-awe-shock-and-awe/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXXI (Original): He Actually Did It

IMG Credit: WWE

Wrestlemania XXXI
Date: March 29, 2015
Location: Levi’s Stadium, Santa Clara, California
Attendance: 76,976
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Tonight is the night. Even though the build hasn’t been the best in recent history, this is still Wrestlemania and the biggest show of the year. The main event is the recently re-signed Brock Lesnar defending his WWE World Heavyweight Title against the winner of the Royal Rumble, Roman Reigns. The card looks good on paper but that has to translate to something more. Let’s get to it.

The stage is HUGE and has a big circle in the middle for a Titantron.

Pre-Show: Tag Team Titles: Los Matadores vs. Usos vs. Cesaro/Tyson Kid vs. New Day

One fall to a finish here. Cesaro and Kidd are defending, Jey Uso has a banged up shoulder and it’s Kofi and Big E for New Day. The Usos are in regular short trunks with tassels and are in San Francisco 49ers colors. The fans are behind Cesaro as he starts with Kingston but Fernando tags Cesaro to come in. Cesaro goes after Jey on the floor and sends him into the barricade, likely to write him out of the match due to his shoulder.

Back in and Kofi takes Fernando down for two as Jimmy checks on his brother. Diego slingshots in with a hilo to Kofi and it’s back to Cesaro for a chinlock. Jey is taken out as Kidd comes in for the Swing into the dropkick for two. Everything breaks down for a bit until it’s only Kofi and Kidd with the latter holding a chinlock. Jimmy comes back in and cleans house with superkicks all around and four straight running Umaga attacks in the corner.

Kofi dives off the top onto Fernando, leaving Jimmy to drop Kidd for a close two. Cesaro drops Jimmy with an uppercut but Big E. tags himself in for a splash on both guys. He throws Kofi at Cesaro for two but everyone goes to the corner for a series of superplexes, a splash and Los Matadores with a powerbomb into a backstabber for two on Kofi. Natalya (and her very low cut outfit) offer a distraction, allowing Torito to hurricanrana Woods into the barricade.

Natalya puts Torito in the Sharpshooter but Naomi dives on a bunch of people, followed by a Rear View to Natalya. Back in and the Midnight Hour gets two on Fernando with Jimmy and Cesaro making a save. The referee actually says Big E. isn’t legal (Lawler: “How would he know?”) with Fernando but Kidd tags himself in anyway, only to have Big E. throw him and Fernando onto his shoulders at the same time.

Kofi kicks Kidd and knees Cesaro in the corner but Los Matadores get in there to knock Cesaro to the floor. The announcers are already calling this a car wreck. A six man Tower of Doom puts everyone not named Uso down, leaving Jimmy to splash Big E. but Cesaro runs in to steal the pin and retain at 10:00.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t as good as last year but it was a completely different kind of match. This was a huge mess with everyone all over the place and no flow to the match after the five minute mark. That being said, at least they went with the right choice for the winners and Natalya got to keep looking awesome. Not a great match or anything but it was fast paced and fun, which is what something like this should be doing.

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

The Miz, Curtis Axel, Ryback, Fandango, Adam Rose, Zack Ryder, Jack Swagger, Titus O’Neil, Darren Young, Big Show, Kane, Erick Rowan, Damien Mizdow, Sin Cara, Goldust, Heath Slater, Mark Henry, Konnor, Viktor, Hideo Itami, Cesaro, Jimmy Uso, Diego, Fernando, Bo Dallas, Kofi Kingston, Big E., Xavier Woods, Tyson Kidd, Alex Riley

There are some unannounced people in there, including everyone in the opener, but I’m not sure I have everyone included. Axel does the Hogan pose and everyone eliminates him at once. It’s a huge mess to start so it’s really hard to see what’s going on. Itami kicks away at Cesaro and gets a great reaction from the fans. Rose and Fandango eliminate each other and Show chops Itami. Miz and Mizdow go after Riley and get him out without too much of a problem.

Bo Dallas breaks up the Broski Boot and dumps Ryder, only to eliminate himself in celebration. He goes back in anyway so Itami kicks him out again. Kidd and Itami kick it out but Big Show punches Hideo out. So much for NXT meaning anything. Kane dumps Los Matadores and Cesaro throws Sin Cara onto the two of them. Henry throws Kidd onto the pile but Ascension gets together to throw him out.

Ascension goes after Big Show as and actually knock him down but JBL points out the obvious problem that creates. Ryback eliminates Viktor and Konnor at the same time, followed by doing the same to Young and Slater. Titus gets eliminated by Ryback as well but it’s Big Show clotheslining Ryback down before knocking out Swagger. New Day triple teams Big Show but he eliminates all of them with ease. We’re down to Jimmy Uso, Rowan, Big Show, Cesaro, Kane, Ryback, Goldust, Miz and Mizdow.

Things finally slow down until Big Show eliminates Rowan (were you expecting anything else?) and Ryback dumps Goldust. Kane breaks up a Shell Shock to Big Show and chokeslams Miz and Mizdow. Cesaro hangs on and slides back in to slam Kane out for a big reaction. Show tosses Jimmy and it’s Cesaro vs. Big Show just like last year. This time though Big Show escapes the slam and throws Cesaro out. Instead it’s Ryback spinebustering Show as we’re down to Ryback, Big Show, Miz and Mizdow.

Show counters the Meat Hook and throws out Ryback, leaving Show to smile at the only two left. The fans cheer for Mizdow, who FINALLY tells Miz no. Miz tries to talk him down and yells at him as Big Show just stands around for two minutes while they argue. Miz goes after Big Show and gets eliminated to a big reaction, only to turn around and see Big Show.

JBL keeps harping on Big Show never winning a battle royal in WWE but Mizdow skins the cat to get back inside. He hammers away but gets taken down by a shoulder. Mizdow avoids a charge to send Show to the apron but Show grabs him by the throat. A guillotine choke looks to do the same ending as the 2004 Royal Rumble but Show shoves him off and wins at 18:11.

Rating: D+. Good grief man really? I mean REALLY? Their big idea is to FINALLY turn Mizdow to a hug…..screw sarcasm. I’m sick of Big Show, I’m sick of him getting pushed, I’m sick of WWE thinking he’s interesting because he’s big, and I’m sick of his old body getting these big moments because he was there in the Attitude Era with his stupid country sounding song. Thanks for all the work Mizdow. Maybe you’ll get a better push if you grow a foot and turn 44.

Aloe Blacc (I haven’t heard of him either) sings America the Beautiful.

The opening video features LL Cool J talking about how universal the world has become with everyone being connected. However, one thing stays the same: us. People come together and feel a connection between themselves. J talks about some great moments in Wrestlemania and says these generations have come together for this night. Kind of a far cry from the huge party down the streets of New Orleans.

Intercontinental Title: Bad News Barrett vs. Stardust vs. R-Truth vs. Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Luke Harper

Ladder match with Barrett defending. Pat Patterson is here to put the belt up, which makes sense as he’s the first Intercontinental Champion and had his greatest fame in this area. Ziggler seems to have braided his hair, Stardust has a cape and Ambrose gets the loudest pop. Dean hits the ring and the brawl is on in a hurry. Truth flip dives onto Barrett and Ambrose but Stardust dives onto all three.

Harper throws Ziggler outside too and hits a big suicide dive. Not to be out done, Dean climbs a ladder for a flying elbow drop to the pile. Truth is up first and goes for the belt but Barrett cleans house with a ladder of his own. Bryan comes in with some running dropkicks to crush Stardust into the ladder into Barrett in the corner but Harper throws the ladder at Daniel’s head. Harper gets tied upside down in the ladder and Bryan fires off some YES Kicks. Apparently being a former World Champion makes you immune to falling ladders.

Ziggler and his hair of doom comes back in with a superkick to Daniel before getting into a climbing contest with Dean. Barrett pulls both guys down before Stardust knocks all three of them down and crushes Ambrose’s legs in the ladder. Stardust goes outside and pulls out the, I quote, Exo-Atmospheric Star Bird. In other words, a ladder with glitter on the sides. That’s fine with Barrett who rips a rung off and beats Stardust with it because I guess he likes black ladders.

We get a stepladder thrown in and Harper sends Dean face first into the ladder in the corner. It’s time for the Terry Funk helicopter spot but Truth drop toeholds him down to break it up. Truth brings in the big ladder but can’t find the middle of the ring, allowing Barrett and Stardust to climb up with Bad News superplexing him down. Dean shoves Bryan and Ziggler’s ladder down before hitting the rebound clothesline to Harper.

That’s fine with Luke as he powerbombs Dean over the top and through a bridged ladder at ringside. Dolph puts Harper in the sleeper but Luke climbs anyway, only to fall backwards to crush Ziggler again. Ziggler is up first though and makes a fast attempt, only to get pulled into a Bull Hammer. Stardust and Truth get one as well but it’s Bryan making the save, only to have Ziggler and Barrett pull down. Back up and the running knee puts Bad News down but Ziggler sprints up the ladder for a slugout. The belt starts swaying but it turns into a headbutt exchange. It’s Ziggler going down though and Bryan wins at 13:55.

Rating: B. Total mess for the most part here but Bryan winning is the smart move. The guy is still one of the most popular guys on the roster and hopefully they’re not going to give him the losing streak. Maybe this makes it the wrestler’s title again, which would be the best thing they could do with the belt. Really good opener here with the right ending to top it off. Harper looked great here too and is a star in the making if they ever figure out how to use him.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Seth Rollins with a different twist: both guys have been called the future but now Orton might be surpassed. Then they go with the stupid story of Orton attacking the Authority, then joining the Authority, then attacking them again. It never made sense before and it doesn’t now.

Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton

Orton has elbow pads again. Some headlocks get us nowhere so Rollins does a standing backflip, only to eat a dropkick. After a quick chase on the floor, Rollins stomps away in the corner but Orton takes his head off with a clothesline. The RKO is broken up by a Stooges distraction, earning them a double elevated DDT onto the floor to get us down to one on one. It takes too much time though and Rollins nails a suicide dive to take Orton out.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before Rollins takes Orton down with a running splash in the corner. An early Curb Stomp attempt is countered into a powerslam followed by a t-bone suplex. Another elevated DDT is countered though and Rollins kicks him to the floor for an Asai Moonsault. Back in and Orton’s superplex is countered but he backdrops Rollins to break up superbomb attempt.

Rollins rolls through a high cross body for two but now the elevated DDT connects. The RKO is countered into the low superkick but Rollins tries a standing Sliced Bread #2, only to walk into the RKO for a very close near fall. That’s not a move you see kicked out of often (outside of a John Cena match of course). The Stooges come in to break up the Punt and take RKOs, setting up a Curb Stomp for another close two. Rollins misses the Phoenix Splash but tries another Curb Stomp, only to be LAUNCHED into the air for the RKO and the pin at 13:35.

Rating: B. Not quite the show stealer it could have been, but man alive that was one heck of an RKO. I was thinking they were going to do the Phoenix Splash into the RKO but that would have been a bit too far. The ending was sweet though and it’s the second really good match in a row to start things off. Orton winning is surprising, but we might not be done with Rollins tonight.

Ronda Rousey is here.

We recap HHH vs. Sting with the on the Authority being corrupt before changing to HHH just wanting to end Sting’s legacy.

Sting vs. HHH

Sting is played out by a Japanese drum group. HHH one ups him with scenes from the new Terminator movie, a shot from the Terminator’s view, and an army of Terminators on stage. HHH is in Terminator attire and Arnold Schwarzenegger himself appears on the screen to say it’s time to play the game. Sting shouldn’t be scared. After all, he knows Robocop. In an added stipulation, you can only win by pinfall or submission. Sting is in his singlet instead of a t-shirt.

After a 45 second staredown, it’s time for the first lockup with Sting shouldering him down. HHH does the same and throws out a crotch chop. Sting is right back up with a dropkick and HHH is stunned. The facebuster is no sold but HHH bails from a Scorpion attempt. Sting follows him out and gets sent hard into the steps to give HHH his first advantage. Back in and HHH starts on the ribs before putting on a chinlock. That goes as far as you would expect before HHH gets two off a spinebuster. We hit the chinlock again but Sting counters into the Deathlock.

Cue the New Age Outlaws and X-Pac (remember no DQ). Sting fights them off with ease and throws HHH to the floor before dives off the top to take DX down! Back in and the Pedigree connects for two with the fans not really buying that as a major threat just yet. It’s sledgehammer time but cue Hall, Nash and Hogan to make it about the Monday Night Wars again. You know, because Sting was SO into the Black and White.

The Death Drop gets two on HHH and we hit a long Deathlock as everyone fights at ringside (with Nash going down and holding his leg, which would be one heck of a rib). Shawn Michaels runs in with Sweet Chin Music to break it up but Sting gets up at two. Gunn hands HHH the sledgehammer but Hall gives Sting the bat. A bat shot to the ribs puts HHH down and another BREAKS THE HAMMER! The Stinger Splash staggers HHH but he comes back with the head of the hammer to knock Sting cold for the pin at 18:35.

Rating: B-. GOOD GRIEF. I was having a great time with the nostalgia until they completely missed the point with the ending. What in the world is the point in bringing Sting in to have him lose? For the sake of doing one more shot at WCW for the Monday Night Wars? That thing that was FIFTEEN YEARS AGO and Vince still isn’t over? The worst part for me was the match was actually rocking before the ending. This was a really fun match until the bad ending, which is way more than I was expecting.

HHH shakes his hand post match. Uh, no. YOU HIT HIM IN THE FACE WITH A HAMMER AFTER COMING OUT WITH AN ARMY OF ROBOTS! NO HE DOES NOT WANT TO SHAKE YOUR HAND!

New series coming to WWE Network: Camp WWE (Rated mature), Jerry Springer’s Too Hot For WWE, a Jackass style show and the new Divas Search.

Daniel Bryan is with Maria Menunos (in a Bushwhackers shirt) when Pat Patterson, Roddy Piper (with a kiss to the head), Ricky Steamboat and Ric Flair come up to congratulate him. A Woo-off ensues until Bret Hart comes in to shake Bryan’s hand and starts a YES chant. Cue Ron Simmons and you know the rest.

Skyler Gray performs the theme song. I’ll use this break to say this show has rocked so far and is WAY better than I was expecting coming in.

Paige/AJ Lee vs. Bella Twins

No recap video but it’s about the Bellas being celebrities and AJ/Paige being themselves. Paige (with blue highlights) takes Nikki down to start but gets caught in an Alabama Slam for an early two. Off to Brie for a front facelock before knocking AJ off the apron. The BRIE MODE running knee to the face gets two for Brie before Nikki comes in with a spinebuster. Paige fights back but there’s still no AJ to tag. Instead she just dives off the apron with a flip to take out both Bellas and now the hot tag brings in AJ.

A quick tornado guillotine onto the top rope sets up a high cross body but Nikki rolls through for two of her own. Nikki lifts her up for an electric chair but AJ spins out into a DDT which was slightly botched but looked good enough. Brie breaks up the Black Widow but Nikki’s big forearm only gets two. Paige sends Brie into the steps and the Black Widow makes Nikki tap at 6:40.

Rating: C+. Well that happened. It was a step above most Divas matches but this really didn’t do anything special. Like I said coming into this match, if there’s nothing on the line, this doesn’t mean much. I’m pretty sure AJ has made Nikki tap before, so this really doesn’t mean anything. Decent match but it certainly didn’t knock anything out of the park. The time didn’t do it any favors though.

Hall of Fame video.

The Class of 2015 is presented. Butch is on crutches but still does the arm wacking.

We recap John Cena vs. Rusev. Cena passed out in the Accolade last month but he choked Rusev out to get a rematch. This is firmly about the USA vs. Russia and Cena wanting to bring the title back home.

US Title: Rusev vs. John Cena

Lana is back and carrying the title, flanked by Russian soldiers carrying the Russian flag. Rusev RIDES OUT IN A TANK to the Russian national anthem. Cena counters with an American theme with various Presidents talking about American exceptionalism but just walks out with the fans singing “John Cena sucks” in time to his music ala the Raw after Wrestlemania last year. Rusev insists that his big match intro is first and Cena stares a hole through him.

Rusev scores with an early spinwheel kick for two and throws Cena around with a suplex. He stops to get the Russian flag though and Cena gets fired up, meaning it’s time to start his finishing sequence. The AA doesn’t work though and Rusev gets two off a spinning belly to back suplex. Rusev gets the same off a spinning Rock Bottom but his superplex is countered for a top rope Fameasser. The fans start chanting for Lana but get shut down as Cena gets two off a tornado DDT.

Rusev comes back with a knee to the head and an Alabama Slam (Russian for “TELL HER THAT’S HOW IT’S DONE!”) for two. Cena takes him down with the STF but Lana throws her shoes in for some reason (that was a real, ahem, heel move) as Rusev makes the ropes. He slams Cena down again and goes up for a pretty good looking top rope headbutt and two more.

The Accolade doesn’t work so Cena gets up, jumps at the ropes like a Lionsault but catches Rusev in a Stunner of all things for two. Rusev shrugs it off and puts on the Accolade but Cena gets to his feet and rams Rusev into the corner. The STF goes on but Lana offers a distraction, only to have Rusev accidentally knock her down, setting up the AA for the pin at 14:43.

Rating: B-. Good match but a bit below their previous match and not exactly the emotion they were going for. They hit all the big points but Cena winning was kind of just there instead of having a big impact. I’m thinking more about that Stunner than anything else, but it’s nice to see Cena with a midcard title and taking a backseat to the World Title. Not that he doesn’t belong in the title scene, but this is refreshing.

Post match Rusev yells at Lana and leaves.

It’s 9:30 and we have two matches left. Those are going to have to go a long time to make this fit. It’s possible that that’s a stretch.

Wrestlemania XXXII is in Dallas on April 3, 2016.

The pre-show panel talks for a bit and recaps the two matches before the show started.

Here are Stephanie and HHH to announce the new attendance record: 76,976. Stephanie talks about being at Wrestlemania I to watch her friend Andre the Giant (my goodness let it go Steph) slam Big John Studd. She takes credit for the evolution of WWE because this company has grown under her leadership. HHH says he beat Sting tonight but he also beat everyone who bet against them. It’s like he beat everyone here tonight and millions more around the world. He owned Sting and every superstar and Diva back there. They own the people too and you know what that means.

Cue the Rock for a huge ovation. Stephanie: “Ok you’re happy to see him. Can you be quiet now?” Rock says the Authority doesn’t own the people or the Rock because he’s an East Bay boy (meaning from this area of California). HHH’s options are to go dress up like Terminator again or we can have a Wrestlemania moment right here, right now. HHH remembers beating Rock in most of their matches so he has nothing to prove. Rock left his heart in San Francisco but HHH left his balls in Connecticut.

Stephanie gets in his face and says Rock is trying to get the fans to cheer for him because he knows without the McMahons, there is no Rock. She brings up Rock’s father and grandfather but the fans chant for Shane. Rock says Stephanie can run her mouth about the McMahons and the Johnsons, but she wouldn’t be in power without McMahon’s Johnson. Stephanie slaps him in the face and asks if he’s going to hit her.

Rock actually leaves as Stephanie still won’t shut up, so Rock goes over to……Ronda Rousey. Fans: “RONDA’S GONNA KILL YOU!” Rock says he would never hit a woman, but Rousey would be happy to. Stephanie says they’re friends but Ronda just stares at her. See, this is Stephanie’s ring so she’s not scared of Ronda. Ronda says any ring she steps into is hers so make her leave.

Stephanie still won’t shut up so Rock warns her about the look on Rousey’s face. “That look means she’s about to reach down your throat and play jump rope with your Fallopian tubes.” HHH remembers that he’s here and says that’s the last thing Rock is saying about Stephanie.

The fight is on and Rock hammers away before Rousey takes HHH down as well. Stephanie pulls back for the slap but Rousey catches the arm….and lets her go as Stephanie screams in pain. Rock says that’s the Wrestlemania moment of the night. WAY longer than it needed to be and Rousey didn’t get nearly enough heat off Stephanie but she looked at home in the ring.

Bray Wyatt vs. Undertaker

No recap but Bray keeps the awesome entrances going with zombie scarecrows that come to life as he passes them. Bray sprained his ankle earlier in the night so he might not be moving like usual. The sun is still partially out so the entrances are nowhere near as ominous as usual. Undertaker has some hair again and looks similar to how he did back in 2002. Bray says all of this is his now and charges into a boot to the face before the bell.

The driving shoulders put Bray down again and Old School connects, only to have Bray nail him with a clothesline. Another clothesline puts Undertaker over the top but he pulls Bray outside. The apron legdrop has Bray in even more trouble as it’s almost all Undertaker early. Back in and Snake Eyes looks to set up the running boot but Bray takes him down with the running cross body. The running splash in the corner gets two and we hit the chinlock.

Undertaker is dragged over to the corner as Bray goes outside for a big running charge into the steps, possibly sending Undertaker’s head into the post. Back in and Bray goes to pick him up but gets caught in Hell’s Gate. Undertaker can’t quite get it locked in though and some right hands get Bray out. A release Rock Bottom and the backsplash get two and Undertaker is rocked.

Sister Abigail is countered into a chokeslam and the Tombstone gets two. Another Tombstone is countered into Sister Abigail for two. Bray Spiders up but Undertaker sits up and just stares at him, making Bray fall back to the mat in an unintentionally funny moment. The look basically said “Boy, what in God’s name do you think you’re doing?” Bray wins a slugout but takes too long mocking Undertaker, allowing Sister Abigail to be countered into another Tombstone for the pin at 15:06.

Rating: B. That sitout to break the spider walk was great but the match worked really well too. This really makes me think that last year was mostly due to the concussion, as this was much closer to the (still overrated) Punk match two years ago. Bray isn’t going to die because of this, but he needs a major win or a big feud soon. Undertaker winning was pretty much the only option, especially since he can still go this well. It wasn’t a masterpiece, but it was more than acceptable.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar. To keep it short, Brock is a monster that can’t be beaten but Reigns says he can do it. There isn’t much more to it than that.

WWE World Title: Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Brock is defending of course and Reigns doesn’t get the best reaction in the world. Reigns goes right for him but gets driven into the corner and thrown down with a German. The F5 from a bloody Lesnar connects in 31 seconds but he doesn’t cover. Brock throws him down again and Reigns looks stunned. He elbows out of another German and the fans are all over him. Brock no sells some clotheslines and throws Reigns with another German.

Reigns smiles up at him and shoves Brock’s face. Brock: “SUPLEX CITY!” Another comeback is countered with the fifth German of the match but Roman keeps smiling at him. Number six has Reigns in even more trouble and Brock drapes him across the top rope. The fans say this is awesome and Brock drives Reigns off the apron and into the barricade. As they come back in, Reigns scores with a knee to the face and fires some kicks to the chest to nothing but boos.

Brock catches a kick though and just BLASTS Reigns with a clothesline to send him back outside. Back in and another suplex sends Reigns flying as Brock seems to like the blood on his face. Now Reigns looks to have some blood in his mouth too. Brock belly to bellies him over the ropes and back inside, followed by the second F5 for two. There go Brock’s gloves and he slaps Reigns in the face a few times. Reigns starts laughing again so Brock throws him down with two more Germans. A third F5 only gets two and Brock is a combination of livid and shocked.

They head outside again and Brock goes hard into the post to really bust him open. He beats the count back in at nine and Reigns is smiling again. Now the Superman Punch connects but he doesn’t go down. A second puts him down in the corner on one knee but the third misses, only to have Reigns counter the German. Reigns headbutts him (hooray for racial stereotypes!) and nails the third Superman Punch followed by the spear but Lesnar stumbles to the corner. A second spear gets two and Reigns is stunned. I totally bought that as the finish.

Brock catches a third spear in the fourth F5 AND HERE COMES ROLLINS! He cashes in right now and I think we have a triple threat! Rollins kicks Reigns to the floor and connects with the Curb Stomp but loads up a second, allowing Lesnar to counter into the F5. Reigns spears Lesnar down but Rollins Curb Stomps Reigns to win the title at 16:43!

Rating: B+. YES! I’ve wanted Rollins to win the title for the better part of a year now and this is the PERFECT way to pay it off. They keep Lesnar looking like a killer, Reigns looks strong and above all else, ROLLINS IS THE WORLD CHAMPION! They were running into a problem with Lesnar as champion: you can only see him squash people for so long before it stops being entertaining. Let him go back to the big featured match and keep him away from the title (or turn him face) and let Rollins be the top star as he should be. I’m thrilled with this and couldn’t be happier. Great choice for an ending to a great show.

Overall Rating: A. We’ll file this under WHERE THE HECK DID THIS COME FROM??? I had a blast with this show and couldn’t be happier if I tried. Above all else, there were no bad matches on the whole card. Not a single one. The worst thing all night was a too long Rock vs. HHH segment to set up a huge match next year and there’s nothing wrong with that. I’m still on a high from that ending and might be overrating the show, but this was a great night all around.

I need to give credit to the entrances too. These were on fire all night and the best thing about them was how much more of a spectacle they made the show. Yeah it’s cool to see them walk down a ramp, but having a tank, robots or a Japanese band (what was up with that?) makes it feel like you’re seeing something special.

I can’t believe how much I liked this show after dreading what I felt was coming. The best part about it though is the renewed faith in the company. Yeah, the build sucked, but they NAILED the show (save for one or two questionable booking moves) and the whole thing was just a blast all around. I had a great time with this and didn’t get bored once, save for a lame concert but we’ll ignore that for now. Really good show and a high quality all night, with the worst match being a totally watchable Divas tag. Loved it and I can’t believe how good of a time I had watching, especially the ending.

Results

Daniel Bryan b. Dolph Ziggler, Luke Harper, Stardust, R-Truth, Dean Ambrose and Bad News Barrett – Bryan pulled down the title

Randy Orton b. Seth Rollins – RKO

HHH b. Sting – Sledgehammer to the face

AJ Lee/Paige b. Bella Twins – Black Widow to Nikki

John Cena b. Rusev – Attitude Adjustment

Undertaker b. Bray Wyatt – Tombstone

Seth Rollins b. Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar – Curb Stomp to Reigns

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6