Monday Nitro – January 29, 2001: The Moral Of The Story

Monday Nitro #275
Date: January 29, 2001
Location: Baltimore Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone

It’s always weird to me when we reach the last every episode in a given month but this is the final ever episode of Monday Nitro in January. Ok so maybe this is just a way to fill in an opening because there isn’t much to talk about at the moment other than Nash vs. Steiner coming up in a few weeks. Let’s get to it.

Elix Skipper vs. Yang vs. Shannon Moore vs. Jamie Noble

One fall to a finish. The big story for this match: WCW is bringing back TIME LIMITS. Noble and Yang do a wrestling sequence to start until Yang grabs a neckbreaker to send Noble outside. Skipper dives out onto him and it’s Shannon vs. Yang inside. Bottoms Up (Fameasser) drops Yang but Skipper has to break up Noble’s German suplex attempt on Shannon. Yang gets crotched on top, followed by Noble front suplexing Skipper for no cover.

Moore is sent outside and all three hit dives in a nice sequence that you only get in cruiserweight melees. Yang drops all of them with an Asai Moonsault and it’s time for a breather. Back in and Shannon slams Skipper off the top for two as Yang makes the save. Noble amps things up by tombstoning Yang on the floor before shoving Skipper off the ropes. Jamie tries a superplex on Shannon but gets reversed into a super Bottoms Up to give Moore the pin.

Rating: C+. What else were you expecting here as you have four talented guys getting to fly around the ring for a bit. Unfortunately they only had a few minutes, which is an annoying reality of this new era. These guys are on more shows but their time has dropped significantly. You can only get so far with four people involved in a five minute match but at least it’s fun while it lasts.

Here are Ric Flair and Animal for a chat. First of all we get the required Baltimore Ravens insults despite them winning the Super Bowl the day before. Anyway, Flair thinks the Cat might be out of office soon and accuses Page and Nash of showing up drunk on Thunder. We see a shot of them knocked out in the locker room, presumably due to an attack by Ric Flair and/or various other villains.

Therefore, Nash has to qualify for the World Title match at SuperBrawl again tonight by beating Totally Buff in a handicap match. Nash is annoyed in the back and it gets worse as Flair says he has a new contract for another incoming star. I could go for a Tommy Rogers cameo but I was always a Fantastics fan.

We see a bit more complete clip from Thunder with the heels leaving Nash’s locker room.

Jeff Jarrett doesn’t want to wait until SuperBrawl to face Page.

A guy bumps into Midajah so Scott Steiner breaks his leg. Does no one understand the concept of a lawsuit around here?

Here are the Cat and Miss Jones for some dancing before Cat says he wants to fight someone. Cue Shawn Stasiak and Mark Jindrak with the latter of them being sent to the back (And called Beetlejuice for some reason. I don’t see the Art Barr resemblance but I don’t have my glasses on.).

Stasiak implies that he’ll be Commissioner if he wins and says first up is going to be a Tag Team Title shot against Palumbo and O’Haire.

The Cat vs. Shawn Stasiak

Jones kicks him in the chest and it’s time for Cat to choke a lot. Cat goes up but dives into an elbow to the jaw, allowing Stasiak to send him outside. A few whips send Cat into the announcers’ table and the post before he clotheslines Cat back inside. Cat actually uses a headscissors before crotch chopping his way out of a sunset flip. The Feliner puts Stasiak away.

Rating: D-. This is a good example of two guys who need backup help to put in a good match and it’s really sad to see them get stuck out there with such a horrible match. Cat defending the Commissionership isn’t an interesting idea, especially when there’s no way someone as worthless as Stasiak is going to take it away from him.

The Wall is outside of Chavo’s locker room when Hugh Morrus comes in and beats the tar out of him.

Mike Sanders tells Crowbar that he has Lance Storm tonight.

Diamond Dallas Page was at a book signing earlier today when a fan started running his mouth and got in a fight. Page broke it up and that’s about it.

A black Humvee arrives.

Luger and Bagwell have a partner for Chavo tonight.

Jeff Jarrett is ready for DDP at SuperBrawl.

Chavo Guerrero Jr./Road Warrior Animal vs. Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman

…they’re going to squash Mysterio and Kidman aren’t they? Kidman and Guerrero start things off but Chavo wants Mysterio. It’s just a ruse though, allowing Guerrero to get in a few kicks to the ribs to start off. That’s fine with Kidman who takes over and brings in Rey for something like a double sitout chokeslam. Kidman comes back in and it’s time for a baseball slide between the legs, followed by the Bronco Buster.

Rey’s middle rope moonsault connects but he lets Chavo makes the tag. The destruction is immediate as Rey and Kidman literally bounce off of Animal, who throws them both around like nothing. Some double dropkicks have Animal down though but a powerslam to Kidman and a powerbomb to Rey allow Chavo to pin Mysterio with ease.

Rating: D. So to recap, Mysterio and Kidman beat up the Cruiserweight Champion for about two and a half minutes before Animal, a grizzled veteran who had barely wrestled in years, destroyed them both at once with ease. That’s life in WCW people and it’s a big reason why you don’t see them around anymore.

The Humvee doors open.

We see part of Flair’s speech earlier.

Here’s Ric Flair to reveal the big new talent which is……Dustin Rhodes. Raise your hand if this actually surprises you. The announcers treat this like a huge deal as Ric thinks Dustin should be in a suit instead of cowboy boots. Dustin wants to know what’s wrong with being a cowboy. Well nothing until you’re about eight and then you kind of look dumb. They yell at each other a bit and Dustin turns down the offer to be on the team and the contract as well.

Cue Animal to help beat Dustin down until Dusty Rhodes makes his return (after turning his back on WCW last time) to clear the ring. So to clarify: Animal can destroy Rey Mysterio and Kidman but Dusty Rhodes can clear him out in a few seconds. To make it even better, Dusty talks about how Flair has been holding back talented people to push his friends. The Rhodes Family is here to clean up WCW and the fans seem very pleased with the idea.

Lance Storm vs. Crowbar

Before the match, Storm says Team Canada supports Flair and company. Ever the troublemaker, Crowbar jumps Storm during the national anthem. The other Canadians help Storm with a superkick and it’s an early beatdown for Crowbar in the corner. A comeback via clotheslines is cut off with a knee lift and we’re already in the chinlock. Crowbar fights up and tries a Tombstone (becoming too common of a move) but has to settle for a reverse DDT for two instead.

A belly to back suplex sets up a slingshot splash for two on Lance, followed by a moonsault out to the floor. Is there a reason Crowbar never got a run near the Cruiserweight Title? It’s not like he can’t fly around and he has more charisma than half of the division. Storm comes back with some German suplexes but gets caught in a northern lights suplex. They head up top with Crowbar trying a hurricanrana, only to get countered into the Maple Leaf for the quick submission.

Rating: C+. Not bad here and I’m sure the fact that it’s the longest match of the night so far has nothing to do with that. I’d love to see Crowbar actually go somewhere beyond just jobbing like this but I really can’t imagine that happening. I mean, the guy used to work in a gas station and it’s not like can just give him a new character and backstory or something like that.

Flair gives Storm the Cat at SuperBrawl for the Commissionership. Now that’s better as you could imagine Storm actually pulling that off.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Actually not so fast as Page is arrested for assault due to breaking up that fight at his book signing. Apparently Page accidentally bumped into a kid during the incident and the kid is the one pressing charges.

Flair thinks this is awesome.

Rick Steiner vs. Shane Douglas

Non-title. Steiner is here to do Cat’s dirty work so Shane made sure the title wasn’t on the line here, which translates to Steiner is going over. Schiavone thinks Steiner is one of the best WCW performers in the last ten years. Douglas gets in a few shots to the back to start before Rick just beats him down like he was Dean Douglas all over again.

Douglas begs off before throwing the referee at Steiner for a breather. The distraction lets Shane grab an Indian Deathlock though he’ll be lucky if Steiner even bothers to limp. I would appear to be right as Steiner pops up and grabs a suplex before…..I think a headlock takeover is botched as Shane tries to do something like a rollup.

Shane grabs a rollup with his feet on the ropes for two before the Pittsburgh Plunge gets the same. Hudson: “Rick’s brother Scott would be proud.” Of what? That the brother he doesn’t like at the moment kicked out of the US Champion’s finisher? The chain is easily broken up as the Steiner Line sets up the bulldog, followed by a Death Valley Driver to make the champ job.

Rating: D. Rick Steiner is not very good and there isn’t much of another way to put it. The booking here continues to baffle me as Rick gets pushed like this every single time he comes back. I’d be stunned if he doesn’t wind up with the US Title out of this because he just needs it so badly and is clearly a draw because he’s reached the age where you become one without having to actually, you know, wrestle well in the slightest.

Kevin Nash vs. Totally Buffed

Before the match, Luger and Bagwell rip on the Raven. Apparently winning the Super Bowl doesn’t count because the real Baltimore team moved to Indianapolis so this is a sham. I’m not sure what they were going for there but it really didn’t work as the fans almost cheered. Nash comes out and pulls Buff to the floor in an attempt to make it 2-1, only to have Buff come back in.

It’s Kevin Nash though so he clotheslines them both down and chokeslams Buff, only to have Luger hit him low. A lot of choking ensues until Nash sends Buff outside and hits Snake Eyes into the Jackknife on Luger. So to recap: Goldberg spends three months fighting Luger and Nash can hit his finisher on him in three minutes with Buff Bagwell in the same match.

Bagwell pulls the ref so here’s Alex Wright of all people in a referee shirt. Wright stops to dance though, earning himself a beating. Another Jackknife to Bagwell allows Cat to come in for two with Wright pulling him out. Guys it’s a short Nitro main event and we’re at two run-ins and three referees. Not that it matters anyway as Cat ducks Wright’s punch and slides back in to count the pin on Bagwell.

Rating: D. As mentioned, this was more about all the shenanigans than anything going on during the match because Bischoff and company think that’s how you build someone up. This was much more about Nash than anyone else as you want him to look strong but you shouldn’t have two of your top heels losing this badly. In other words, just let Nash beat Luger, assuming Nash is old enough to do that yet.

Post match Nash wants Steiner but we’re out of time.

Overall Rating: D+. You really can see the line between the generations here as the old guys suck while the young guys are working as hard as they can with the limitations they’re put under. They don’t get time and they’re often there as cannon fodder for the old guys (Kidman and Mysterio getting treated that way by ANIMAL was disgusting) but they’re putting in as much effort as they can.

That’s probably a big reason why Mysterio is a multiple time WWE World Champion and Kidman had a very nice WWE run before getting a job as a producer. In other words: no matter how little time you’re given out there, someone is going to see it at some point and if you’re good enough and work hard enough, you’ll get a break somewhere down the line.

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Monday Nitro – January 23, 2001: Same Old, Same Really Old

Monday Nitro #274
Date: January 23, 2001
Location: Lawrence Joel Memorial Coliseum, Winston-Salem, North Carolina
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone

We’re on a Tuesday this week as TNT has stopped pretending that Nitro is the ratings juggernaut it was back in the day. It’s the new era of WCW (the latest one that is) with Ric Flair in charge and evil for reasons that haven’t yet been and won’t be explained because WCW. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the pay per view and last week’s show, which night as well have Nash going TOO SWEET to make it feel more NWOesque.

Last week, the heel stable was eating chicken wings and breaking the bones in time with Sid breaking his leg. Ok that’s kind of awesome.

Tony and Scott say WCW has new owners and it’s not clear where things are going.

Here are Flair, Animal, Luger and Bagwell to get things going. Flair gets right to the point and says that Steiner, who isn’t here yet, deserves a top level opponent for SuperBrawl. That makes Flair think of one name and that would be….Alex Wright. Alex actually comes out as the heels can’t keep straight faces, only to have Kevin Nash cut him off. Wright yells (and rightfully so) and is promptly powerbombed through the stage.

Nash declares himself #1 contender with Cat coming out to say that’s correct. Flair says not so fast because Nash has to beat Bagwell first and Luger will be guest referee. Not so fast either as Luger has to face Diamond Dallas Page for the right to be guest referee in the main event #1 contenders match (my head hurts). Oh and Buff or Nash can’t interfere, because other wrestlers not being allowed to interfere is a special rule.

Mike Sanders gives Chavo Guerrero a pep talk and tells him to watch the next match closely. The Wall is here too and promises to end the legend of the Misfits tonight.

Flair tells Jarrett and Steiner what’s going on. Was there any reason to not have them be there during the talking segment?

Michael Modest vs. Christopher Daniels

Modest had one match on Nitro in March 2000 and hasn’t been seen since. Daniels is 29 here (in his mid-20s according to Tony) because he’s never been a young wrestler in his life. He does however have hair here which is quite jarring. Daniels punches away to start but gets taken down with some wristlocks that have Modest dropping to the mat as he twists. Daniels botches a springboard and almost lands on his head allowing Modest to crank on the arm a bit more.

Modest takes a kick to the shoulder which puts Daniels on the mat for reasons that aren’t clear. They head outside with Modest being sent into the barricade and eating a dropkick through the ropes, followed by a slingshot splash to the floor. Daniels seems to have shaken off whatever was wrong with him at the start. Back in and Daniels hits a slingshot moonsault (called split legged by Hudson despite the fact that Daniels’ legs were in fact unsplit) for two before getting caught in a dragon suplex for two of his own.

Daniels pops back up to the top but Modest runs across the ring and does a handstand into a hurricanrana to bring him right back down. Modest gets dropped again though and the BME gets two, only to have Modest get the same off something like White Noise. A second attempt is countered into a modified Angel’s Wings (Daniels flipped Modest onto his back instead of his face) for two more. Modest cross bodies him out to the floor and here’s Scott Steiner to destroy them both for a no contest.

Rating: C+. It was nice while it lasted but why bother letting either guy go anywhere when you can use them as cannon fodder for WCW? This would be the last appearance in WCW for both guys but at least they were able to be in the ring for a bit before Steiner got to treat them like the most worthless goons this side of The Goon. At least let someone win the match before the run-in.

Steiner uses the pipe to break both their legs before saying he broke Sid’s leg on purpose. They’ll be laying next to Sid and Nash is going to be added to the list soon.

Here are Kwee Wee and Paisley with something to say. He’s ticked off about now being part of Flair’s team and it’s clear that he’s tough enough after the beating from Rick Steiner on Monday. Kwee Wee issues a challenge to anyone in this building, including fans. For some reason he goes after a security guard and beats him down until other guards break it up. As usual this would work better minus the overly gelled hair and glitter.

Team Canada comes out with Lance Storm challenging Konnan to a one on one match with the winner being the official winner of the war between the Canadians and the Filthy Animals. Konnan comes out to accept in his own unique way.

Lance Storm vs. Konnan

They hit the mat to start where Konnan is completely out of his league. Storm grabs the Maple Leaf but gets kicked in the face for a break. Konnan hits the rolling lariat as everyone else brawls on the floor, as they should be. The faceplant is broken up and an Irish whip transitions into the Maple Leaf for the tap out in less than two minutes. Some war, but midcards never meant anything under Bischoff’s watch.

Shane Douglas wants on the team and Luger says he’s in if he can beat the Cat.

General Rection looks a little crazy as Gene asks him about everything the former Misfits have been going through lately. Lash says he’ll have Rection’s back until the end. Rection says it wasn’t supposed to be like this and asks for Lash’s shirt. He’s honorably discharged from the team and it’s time to return to their roots. Rection takes off his shirt and says Hugh Morrus is back. Uh, yay.

Lex Luger vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Winner gets to referee the #1 contenders main event. Luger stalls to start so Page knocks him out to the floor so he can stall while looking up at the ring. Back in and Luger hits an atomic drop and belly to back, burning up half of his arsenal in a few seconds. A shoulder sends Page into the corner and it’s time to stomp a lot. Page crotches him against the post and sends Luger head first into the buckle several times. The referee gets bumped so here’s Jarrett with the guitar to set up the Torture Rack for the Luger win.

Rating: D. I could go with this a little bit more if they didn’t set all this up an hour ago for a payoff half an hour from now. You could pencil Jarrett’s interference in here as soon as they said Bagwell and Nash couldn’t interfere. Again: we’ve reached the point where interference being banned is a special stipulation. How did that happen?

Mamalukes vs. Shawn Stasiak/Mark Jindrak

The Thrillers jump Johnny at the bell so he has to kick Stasiak’s head off for a breather. It’s off to Vito who helps with a double belly to back suplex on Shawn. The Mamalukes take over on Jindrak as well, including a double back elbow for two. Stasiak comes in again and misses a charge in the corner as this is completely one sided so far.

Shawn finally gets in a jumping back elbow to the jaw before bringing in Jindrak for one off a moonsault. Vito takes a double elbow of his own, which is finally enough for Johnny to come in without a tag as everything breaks down. Vito kicks Stasiak and Jindrak clotheslines Johnny for two each, only to have the rest of the Thrillers come in for the weak DQ.

Rating: D+. As illogical as it was for the Thrillers to come in there, you kind of had to know that was going to be the ending. That’s how most matches end around here these days because so many people are in some kind of a faction. The Mamalukes continue to be perfectly acceptable jobbers to the stars and that’s all they need to be.

Stasiak and Jindrak aren’t happy that they just lost a match due to interference. My goodness that actually makes sense.

Post break the Thrillers are still arguing with Sanders not being able to calm them down. Flair pulls Sanders off to the side and tells him to outsmart the rest of the team.

Shane Douglas vs. The Cat

If Shane wins he’s on the team. We get the usual Shane insults to the crowd to start because that’s his big thing. That’s not to say it doesn’t work well enough though. Cat isn’t ready to go yet as he has to make Jarrett vs. Page for SuperBrawl. He also wants to make this for the US Title but Flair comes on screen to say it’s non-title. Instead, the Commissioner’s job is on the line.

Douglas jumps him from behind to start and Flair makes it No DQ to insure a messy ending. Something like a bridging Indian Deathlock has Cat in trouble before a poke to the eye cuts him off again. Shane gets slammed off the top and sent into the buckle ten times as the match warps back to 1987. Cat keeps up the Hogan offense with ten right hands to the head in the corner, only to get poked in the eye again. Cue Mike Sanders followed by the Thrillers to take Cat out but Rick Steiner makes the save, allowing Cat to superkick a chain out of Douglas’ hand for the pin to keep his job.

Rating: D. Somehow that wasn’t as messy as I was expecting it to be, which is saying a lot. Keeping Cat short like this (under five minutes) is the right idea and the match could have been a lot worse. If nothing else Cat is great proof of how charisma is far more important than in ring abilities and almost always will be.

Post match Cat does his dancing and Rick actually joins him for a bizarrely entertaining visual.

Hugh Morrus/Lash Leroux vs. A-Wall/Chavo Guerrero Jr.

It’s a brawl to start and no one can stop Wall (or A-Wall as he’s still being called here, even though he’s out of the team) until Morrus grabs a slam, only to tag off to Leroux by mistake. Morrus says that was just a high five and Wall uses the distraction to make the tag off to Chavo. Wall chokes Lash in the corner a bit as Morrus tries to get in as this breaks down into a more standard tag match.

Lash gets in a quick tilt-a-whirl slam and scores with a clothesline for two, only to get caught in a Gory Special for a few seconds. Back up and Chavo accidentally hits Wall because you have to have heel miscommunication. Chavo doesn’t seem to mind and dropkicks Lash for two with Morrus coming in to break it up. Wall goes after Morrus to start a brawl, allowing Chavo to grab a rollup on Lash for the pin.

Rating: C-. This worked better than it probably should have but above all else it was a good sign that Chavo wound up getting the pin instead of having another champion get beat. Morrus is still being treated as a big deal and it’s nice to be able to go with the stupid name instead of the really stupid name. Lash still isn’t all that great in the ring and is really just a guy in wrestling gear but he could be worse.

Morrus beats Chavo up post match. Sore loser.

Kevin Nash vs. Buff Bagwell

Lex Luger is guest referee and if Nash wins he gets the title shot at SuperBrawl. Totally Buff wastes some time as Luger promises to call it right down the middle. Nash starts with a knee to the well toned abs and chokes in the corner with the boot, drawing some harsh criticism from Luger. Thankfully the whole fair referee thing doesn’t last long as Luger grabs Nash’s foot so Buff can crotch him on the way back inside. However, Lex counts very slowly for Bagwell with Nash kicking out before one, causing Bagwell to yell at Luger.

Bagwell’s chinlock keeps things so slow that it’s Nash being the one on his feet to speed things up with a side slam. Of course it’s another slow cover and Snake Eyes gets the same speed, only to have Luger cut off the count at two instead of screwing around with the pretext. It’s time for a chair with Luger holding it up so Bagwell can knock it into Kevin’s head.

The Blockbuster doesn’t work though as Nash ducks to send them crashing into each other. Of course this is treated as some heroic comeback because WCW announcers are easily entertained. Cue Diamond Dallas Page to hit the Diamond Cutter on Luger. Nash gets up and Jackknifes Bagwell to set up the Austin/McMahon count with Nash grabbing the unconscious Luger’s hand to count the pin.

Rating: D-. This was every crooked referee match you’ve ever seen because there isn’t much you can do to change this gimmick. Nash was obviously getting the title shot and somehow this was the better choice than Nash vs. Luger with Bagwell as the referee. Unfortunately Luger and Bagwell are still some of the top heels in the company and this is about as high speed as they’re going to be able to go.

Post match Scott Steiner, Kronik, Animal and Jarrett come out for the big brawl to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. So to recap, this whole show took two hours to set up Steiner vs. Nash at SuperBrawl. One of the matches was to set up a guest referee for a match to establish Nash as the #1 contender. Just like back in the NWO days, there’s the issue of having so much of the show revolve around that one story, which isn’t very good in the first place. There are other stories on the show to help things out a bit but a lot of them are tied into the Flair super stable stuff in some way. It’s another show full of bad wrestling and focused around one tired story, which is an idea that has barely ever worked but WCW kept doing it.

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Monday Nitro – January 15, 2001: Welcome Back Uncle Eric

Monday Nitro #273
Date: January 15, 2001
Location: Allen County Coliseum, Fort Wayne, Indiana
Attendance: 4,836
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson

We’re past Sin and heading towards SuperBrawl with the big story being Scott Steiner retaining the World Title after Sid Vicious broke his leg. However the interesting thing (work with me here) was the Mystery Man being revealed as Animal, who sided with Steiner and Jeff Jarrett. Oh and Goldberg is retired. Forever. Let’s get to it.

Of note: this is the first TV show under the new Eric Bischoff regime. He had some influence on last night’s pay per view but I’m not sure if it was full control or not.

Quick recap of the World Title match and Goldberg’s loss.

We see some exclusive footage from after the show with Ric Flair hugging Steiner as Buff Bagwell and Lex Luger watch on. So yeah, Flair is the big villain again.

The announcers recap the big stories of last night and show us the HORRIBLY graphic footage of Sid’s leg being snapped like a twig. That still makes me cringe.

Here are Luger and Bagwell in suits to what sounds like a funeral march. A group of jobbers follow them out with a coffin and we get an In Memory Of graphic for Goldberg. The announcers continue to act all shocked that Flair was behind it. HE’S RIC FLAIR. HE’S EVIL. Why does this continue to surprise you? Bagwell cries as the casket is opened to reveal…..a copy of Goldberg’s book, a spear and a jackhammer. The fans are absolutely livid over this stuff so points for getting the fans to boo.

Luger thinks Goldberg would have wanted this outpouring of emotion because they were great friends. The music is still playing as Bagwell tries to get the fans to keep chanting GOLDBERG. Luger asks if anyone has a special Goldberg story and would like to let us hear it so here’s a crying Jarrett to put a guitar on top of the casket. Jarrett has one memory above all others and eventually gets around to talking about how Goldberg never beat him. Goldberg is a long list of adjectives slap nuts and Tony freaks out that no one can stop this from continuing.

Now it’s time for Scott Steiner to come out with Midajah, who is wearing a veil for a bizarrely creepy look. Steiner takes credit for getting rid of Sid before switching over to Goldberg. Scott didn’t hurt him but at Fall Brawl, he gave Goldberg the worst defeat of his career. Goldberg just wasn’t man enough to stay on top so there’s no rematch. For a genuinely awesome evil moment, Steiner spits in the coffin….and there’s Goldberg’s music.

We cut to his locker room door and it’s Ric Flair and Animal coming out. After a break (oh yeah this is going on for a LONG time) Flair is in the ring to say this is the NEW WCW. Flair goes on about how awesome a collection of talent we have here and how he was behind the Tag Team Title change, the demise of Goldberg and Sid’s injury. The announcers are still shocked that Flair did this.

Flair talks about all the great wrestlers they have and how any of them could destroy anyone at any given time. Tony brings up an important question: WHY DID FLAIR DO THIS??? He’s been talking for a good while now and there hasn’t been an actual explanation for why he did all of this. It doesn’t get any better as Flair says he’ll be interviewing everyone all night long and gets to find out their stance: they can either become one of the group or be handed over to them.

Cue Kevin Nash to say he left Big Sexy back in Indianapolis and brought the killer here instead. Nash is sounding far more intense than usual here. Tonight he wants to face Steiner before he comes to kill Flair. Nash isn’t alone either as here are Diamond Dallas Page and Rick Steiner (great) to help even things up a bit. Kevin says he wants a title shot against Scott tonight but Flair says he makes the matches.

Cue Commissioner Cat to say not so fast because the title match is on, FINALLY ending this segment at nearly half an hour. Good grief people. I know it’s a new regime but we shouldn’t be a fourth of the way into the show after one segment, especially when we didn’t even get a reason for why Flair did all this. Nash and Page as the top faces make sense as there’s the simple problem of there being no one else around to fill the spots. I’m fine with the latest NWO story but this could have been cut WAY down.

After a break, Flair asks Crowbar if he’s going to be a team player. Crowbar says he’s always been a loner so he’s going to keep doing that way. Apparently Flair is going to give him a chance to prove his skills right now.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Crowbar

Chavo is defending and I’m oddly intrigued by this. Feeling out process to start before the champ getting in a kick to the face, followed by a top rope hurricanrana. The announcers keep wondering how Crowbar is going to be able to fight without trashcans. So are chairs just not good enough for them anymore? Chavo dives off the apron to take Crowbar down again but that means the fight heads outside where Crowbar is in better shape.

Back in and a slingshot legdrop gets two on the champ, only to have Chavo come back with chops and uppercuts. A Death Valley Driver plants Chavo for a delayed two but he blocks a top rope hurricanrana to get a breather. The tornado DDT is broken up as well and Crowbar gets a near fall off a northern lights suplex. Chavo is sent out to the floor again and Crowbar scores with his apron splash. Instead of going for the pin though, it’s time for a chair but Chavo slingshots out to drive Crowbar face first into the chair. Somehow that’s not a DQ so Chavo takes him back inside for the tornado DDT to retain.

Rating: C+. Stupid ending aside, this was still entertaining enough and that’s all it needed to be for the story. I’m assuming Crowbar isn’t going to get the invite to the new stable, which thankfully means he isn’t the nothing wrestler that WCW has presented him as for months. Good little match here as Chavo continues to get better and better every week.

Bam Bam Bigelow (He still works here?) accepts Totally Buff’s offer to be on the team.

Rey Mysteiro Jr./Billy Kidman vs. 3 Count

Again, this should be good. They start fast with some 3 Count miscommunication to give the Animals some early control. Shane hurricanranas Kidman out to the floor, leaving Rey to take a sitout powerbomb/neckbreaker combo for two. Kidman is right back in for the save and it’s a Bronco Buster for Helms.

There are no tags anywhere in sight so far. Shannon takes Kidman out with a flip dive and lands on his feet just to show off. Rey dives on both of them before Shane dives on all three of them. Back in and Kidman snaps off a top rope hurricanrana for two but eats a superkick from Shane. The Vertebreaker is broken up to prevent broken vertebrates and Kidman adds the Kid Crusher for the pin.

Rating: B. There were no tags in the entire match but sweet goodness this felt like an old cruiserweight match for the first time in far too long. It’s really cool to see Mysterio and Kidman show off how awesome they can still be in the ring while 3 Count can more than go with anyone. Really fun stuff here, even though it barely broke three minutes.

Post match Team Canada runs in to go after the Animals because this feud is still going. Storm grabs the mic and asks Kidman if he wants a hair vs. hair match against Mike Awesome. Kidman accepts, giving us what could be one heck of a match.

Cat thanks Kronik for their help last night and gives them a Tag Team Title match as a reward. No charge for this one.

Team Canada beats Kidman down.

Flair offers Chavo a spot on the team, which still seems to be called The New WCW. Chavo doesn’t seem interested but Ric tells him to go chase the Nitro Girls and have some tequila before they talk about it tomorrow. Chavo leaves and Mike Sanders comes in to suck up but Ric thinks he was just trying to make a spot. Flair makes him his new pet project to make him the new Dirtiest Player in the Game. Oh and don’t worry about Kronik getting the Tag Team Titles back.

Totally Buff goes up to General Rection because we haven’t flown through enough stuff tonight. Rection doesn’t say anything and looks a bit stunned.

Tag Team Titles; Kronik vs. Sean O’Haire/Chuck Palumbo

Kronik is challenging. Palumbo punches Adams around to start but gets thrown to the floor, allowing Clark to hit his flip dive off the apron. Tony: “HAS HE EVER DONE THAT???” Scott: “Of course he has.” It’s off to O’Haire vs. Adams with the full nelson slam planting the champ for two. Clark comes in for some chops as the announcers say any move could be your last as Sid proved last night. Palumbo gets the tag and is promptly suplexed, only to have O’Haire break up the Meltdown.

Adams tries to come in but the distraction just lets Sean nail Clark in the back of the head. A DDT plants O’Haire though and the hot tag brings in Adams as everything breaks down. High Time gets two on Sean with Chuck making the last second save. Cue Jindrak and Stasiak for a distraction though, allowing Palumbo to score with the Jungle Kick on Adams. Clark gets beaten down on the floor (Hudson: “WHERE IS THE REFEREE?”) as Adams is superplexed to set up the Seanton Bomb for the pin to retain the titles.

Rating: D+. They kept this moving to make sure people didn’t realize how weak Kronik becomes in an actual match but you knew the screwy finish was coming. Thankfully they have the titles on the best pairing as Jindrak and Stasiak are some of the least interesting guys I’ve seen in a good while.

Kidman can’t wrestle so Konnan is taking his place.

O’Haire and Palumbo yell at Jindrak and Stasiak because they didn’t need the help. Sanders and Reno come in to make peace.

Konnan vs. Mike Awesome

Hair vs. hair…..so I guess Kidman’s hair is on the line since Konnan is bald. Indeed that’s the case with Flair popping up on screen to make that clear. Konnan gets beaten down in the corner to start until he snaps off a headscissors to take over. Awesome stops a charge in the corner with a raised boot and a belly to back suplex gets two. Back up and Konnan wristdrags him out of the corner and it’s time to fight on the floor.

Awesome chairs him in the ribs but dives off the steps right into a chair shot to the head. Back in and Mike raises a boot to stop Konnan (looked horrible as Konnan had already landed when he hit the boot), only to have the Awesome Bomb countered into a faceplant (nice nod to Kidman, who can’t be powerbombed you see). A spinebuster sets up the Awesome Splash for two so Awesome goes back up, only to get caught in a super DDT for the pin and Mike’s hair.

Rating: C-. Dang it I really wanted to see Kidman vs. Awesome but instead we got Konnan’s slow offense to mess things up. Kicking out of the Awesome Splash was a big stretch, especially when you could probably have done the same thing with the splash missing but why do that when you can push Konnan harder?

Post match Konnan snips off the back of Awesome’s hair until Team Canada makes the save.

Chavo tries to talk to Rection but the General really doesn’t want to hear it.

Storm tells Awesome that they’ll get the last laugh.

Tickets go on sale for SuperBrawl: Revenge (great title) on Saturday, or less than a month before the show.

Here’s Cat to say send someone out here for him to fight.

The Cat vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Bigelow runs him over and stomps away with a belly to back getting two. The announcers talk about how important this match is as Bigelow chokes away, only to miss a charge in the corner. A chop and the dancing elbow get two on the big man, followed by the Feliner for the very quick pin.

Post match it’s dance time.

US Title: Shane Douglas vs. General Rection

Shane is defending after winning the title last night. Before the match, Shane asks how the fans like him now. Apparently the title weighs 16lbs. Good piece of trivia. Rection starts with right hands and clotheslines for two but Shane comes back with right hands of his own. That’s fine with Rection who wins a slugout and kicks Shane in the ribs. The top rope elbow misses though as Rection takes too much time getting to the top. It’s already chain time but Rection gets to his feet and press slams Shane before throwing the chain out. Cue Chavo to sneak in a chain shot so Shane can get the cheap pin to retain the title.

Post break Rection holds his head and almost cries about how much he wants to fight Chavo. He’s tired of being General Rection or Hugh Morrus but he’s going to finish Chavo’s career. Hopefully that means it’s time for a better name. Like one that’s not a pun.

WCW World Title: Kevin Nash vs. Scott Steiner

Steiner is defending and I think you know what’s coming here. Scott easily takes him into the corner and hammers away to start before Nash spins him around and does the same. A clothesline puts Scott outside and an angry Nash stays on him with the right hands. I’d be mad too if I was asked to wrestle twice in one night.

Scott gets in a shot to the ribs and a spinning belly to belly gets two back inside. The Push-Up Elbow lets the champ show off a bit and a delayed backbreaker sets up a bow and arrow hold. Nash starts fighting up and scores with the side slam but can’t cover because he’s gassed after three and a half minutes. Snake Eyes and the big boot set up the Jackknife and here come the troops for the DQ.

Rating: C. Shockingly watchable match here with both guys working hard and faster than I’ve seen in a long time. Of course the lack of any drama about the ending didn’t help things but that’s par for the WCW course. Still though, for who was in there and how the ending was going to go, this was a glorified miracle.

The remaining good guys come in for the brawl to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Yeah it was actually good and it’s a strong sign for the start of the Bischoff regime. Unfortunately it’s nothing we haven’t seen before and I have no reason to believe that WCW won’t screw this up by the time Thunder airs in two days. The new NWO isn’t going to last long with Lex Luger and Jeff Jarrett as the second and third in command but at least it’s something coherent and focused for a change, which is a far cry from the disasters that WCW tends to put on.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Sin 2001 (2016 Redo): One Of Their Many Problems

Sin
Date: January 18, 2001
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 6,617
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson

We’re down to three WCW pay per views to go and the build to this one hasn’t exactly instilled me with confidence. The main event is a four way for the World Title with a mystery man included. Based on everything else WCW has done with their attempts at surprises in recent years, I really can’t imagine this going well. Let’s get to it.

The opening video lists off the seven deadly sins with shots of people in the major matches. I’d think WCW has had far more than seven sins, such as bringing in Russo, keeping Russo, David Arquette and I could probably go on for a long time.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Shane Helms

Chavo is defending and Shane asks his partner Shannon Moore to let him do this on his own. They hit the mat to start with Shane grabbing a Fujiwara armbar to send Chavo over to the ropes. A hammerlock does the same and it’s time for Chavo to fire off some chops. That earns him an armdrag down, followed by a fireman’s carry into a facebuster on the knee.

It’s off to the floor with Chavo being sent into the barricade as this has been almost all Shane so far. As expected I spoke too soon as Chavo comes back with an Alabama Slam for two which Tony says is part of Chavo’s new attitude. We hit the chinlock for all of three seconds before Shane fights up and grabs a running neckbreaker. The X Plex (not a dragon suplex Tony) gets two on the champ but Chavo sends him outside for a big dive off the top.

Shane is right back up and sends Chavo outside for something like a frog splash cross body to drop Guerrero. A Samoan drop gets two for Shane but the Vertebreaker is countered. Shane settles for the Nightmare on Helm Street for a very close two. Back up and Shane tries it again, only to be reversed into a tornado DDT attempt. That’s countered as well but Shane still can’t hit the Nightmare, allowing Chavo to grab a brainbuster to retain.

Rating: B+. I really dug this one as they were just hitting each other with one big spot after another until Chavo won a wrestling sequence because that’s his bread and butter. Shane is clearly a star in the making though and the division is really looking up with all the other names around to have great matches with Chavo or whoever has the title in the near future.

The announcers talk for a bit because the opener was entertaining so we need to slow things down before the crowd has too much fun.

Earlier today, Ric Flair arrived but still won’t reveal the Mystery Man.

Big Vito and Johnny the Bull are ready for Reno because this is what Vito stands for.

Reno vs. Big Vito

They’re brothers who are fighting over Reno picking the Thrillers over family though this feud hasn’t been talked about much in recent weeks. Johnny has disappeared between the backstage segment and coming to the ring with no explanation of why he’s not here. Just have Vito say “I’m handling this one myself” or don’t have Johnny, who didn’t say anything, there for the promo.

Reno powerslams him down to start and stomps away for two. It’s time to go outside with Vito being sent into various metal objects until he comes back with a clothesline to get his first offense. There’s a superplex for two on Reno but he stays on his feet after an enziguri. Instead Reno sends him shoulder first into the post so the pounding can continue. Vito finally comes back with a Mafia kick and a top rope elbow for two. The inverted DDT is broken up though as Reno throws him down with a t-bone. Back up and Reno reverses a backdrop for Roll of the Dice and the pin.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but nothing I’m interested in watching. Vito has gone from someone showing promise to being just another guy on the roster who loses most of the time. Reno is someone who looks like he has potential but there doesn’t seem to be anything under the surface.

Mike Sanders talks to Brian Adams like he’s an idiot but pays him off anyway. Bryan Clark comes up with money of his own for a better job.

Jung Dragons vs. Noble and Karagias

Bonus match. Evan and Kaz slug it out to start until Kaz lifts him up for a German suplex. Everything breaks down and a double dropkick lets the Dragons clear the ring, followed by a double moonsault as a bonus. Back in and Kaz throws Evan off the top to break up a superplex, only to be dropkicked out of the air (mostly at least as Evan wasn’t quite on target).

Karagias side slams Kaz so Jamie can add a top rope legdrop for two, followed by a hard cross body for two more. Evan loads up Kaz for a gorilla press but gets countered into an attempted tornado DDT, only to have that reversed into a spinebuster to plant Kaz. Jamie comes in and blasts Yang off the apron to prevent the tag so Kaz kicks him in the head to put Noble down.

Now the hot tag brings in Yang to speed things WAY up, which is quite surprising given how fast it already was. Evan springboards down onto Kaz and Yang counters Noble’s hurricanrana into a super Batista Bomb for two of his own. A 450 gets another near fall on Yang but Kaz springboards in with a DDT. Yang COMPLETELY misses Yang Time (as in Jamie didn’t even need to move) so he has to grab a small package to pin Noble instead.

Rating: B+. Sweet goodness they’re working hard tonight. This was an excellent cruiserweight tag match but do you really expect anything else from any combination of these two and 3 Count? They just know how to put on entertaining matches with high spot after high spot. Really fun match here that didn’t overstay its welcome, which is so important in a match like this.

Totally Buff arrives in an old purple car. Their backup plan with Goldberg is to have someone run in to get him disqualified so he’ll be fired. Why has no one else ever thought of that?

Mike Sanders vs. The Cat

This is for the commissionership and the services of Ms. Jones, who is supposed to be with Sanders here but comes out with Cat. Sanders says he wants to keep the job for the money and nothing else. Cat is bald for a change of pace. Yeah Sanders is here for the money but Cat is here for the people. We actually get a fan poll to waste a few seconds until Sanders jumps him from behind to take over. Mike is now in trunks with his Thrillers muscle shirt for a really weird look. Cat chases him to the floor for a bit but Sanders keeps pounding away as this is going nowhere to start.

Some right hands in the corner have Mike in trouble so he low blows Cat for a break. A high sunset flip doesn’t work on Cat as he crotches chops and then hits Sanders in the head. Mike tries a chair but Jones takes it away and kicks him in the back. Cue the Thrillers to beat up Cat as the referee is yelling at Jones, only to have Kronik come out and save him, revealing who paid the higher amount. Clark shoves the money in Sanders’ mouth (Why?) and Cat gives him the Feliner to become Commissioner again, basically guaranteeing that Flair goes evil soon. Somehow the referee didn’t see or hear ANY of that because of course.

Rating: D. Yeah it’s the worst match of the night but it’s not even six minutes long and was entertaining enough. Neither guy is worth much in the ring so it’s a good idea to have one of them being a talker instead of a full time wrestler. Cat is a fun enough guy so this was fine for what it was, which to be fair wasn’t much.

Flair and Goldberg see Totally Buff arriving and talking about the DQ. Ric makes it No DQ and then introduces Goldberg to a friend of his whose son is a fan. Goldberg signs an autograph and takes a picture……which seems to lead nowhere. Ok then.

Jeff Jarrett says Scott Steiner can trust him but no one else. Oh and Gene will be back in the retirement home if he doesn’t stop spreading these rumors. The announcers make sure to point out that Jarrett sounded defensive.

Team Canada vs. Filthy Animals

This is a six man tag with a penalty box, meaning if you break a rule you’re out for a designated time period. Jim Duggan is guest referee. Team Canada (Lance Storm, Mike Awesome and Elix Skipper with Major Gunns) come out in the Team Canada bus. Storm accuses Duggan of being in the Animals’ back pocket. Duggan reads off the list of things that could draw a penalty to really drag things out.

Storm and Mysterio start with Rey (with Kidman and Konnan here) headscissoring Lance into the corner. Rey gets crotched though so Storm brings in Skipper but the referee says that wasn’t enough of a tag. Awesome complains too and bumps Duggan, meaning he’s in the box for one minute. So Storm gets triple teamed for a bit with Konnan powerbombing Rey on top of him for no cover.

Skipper gets back in and gets planted by a Kidman suplex. Awesome pulls Kidman down from the apron and gets penalized with storm being thrown in for a pull of the hair a few seconds later. Konnan scores with a rolling lariat on Skipper before putting on something like a Koji Clutch crossed with a Kimura on the mat (actually called a Mr. Salty).

That goes nowhere so Rey drops a leg as the other Canadians come in. I mean, it’s not like the penalties have meant anything here but they’ve been happening. Skipper tries to Matrix up but gets taken down with a reverse DDT for two. A missile dropkick puts Konnan down but Elix lands on his feet like Koko B. Ware used to do.

Konnan headscissors and Rey tries a Bronco Buster, only to be sent to the box because Awesome is on the ropes. Kidman is sent with him for no apparent reason, allowing the women to get into it over a water bottle. That means both of them are sent into the box as Skipper puts on a chinlock, much to Storm’s chagrin. Konnan finally puts Storm down and the hot tag brings in Kidman to clean house. A powerbomb plants Storm again and the now legal Rey backdrops Kidman over the top to take Lance out again.

Everything breaks down and Skipper is thrown in the box somewhere in there. Awesome tries to cut Kidman’s hair for some reason and goes to the box as well. Tygress adds a Bronco Buster to Storm and gets boxed as well. The Kid Crusher gets two on Storm with Awesome making the save. An Awesome Bomb plants Rey and Kidman taps to the Maple Leaf for the win.

Rating: D. What a freaking mess. Not only was there no sense of logic in the penalties (yes they were called straight but that’s not how something like this is supposed to go) but the match was all messy with the penalties not really meaning anything since the wrestlers in trouble wouldn’t have been able to tag out anyway. There’s too much going on here and having the heels in the box most of the time defeats the point of the match.

Sanders says the Thrillers are ready to get the Tag Team Titles back.

The Insiders are getting ready.

We recap the Hardcore Title match which saw Terry Funk coming back and destroying Crowbar at Starrcade to take the title. Crowbar decided he wasn’t being serious enough and went back to his roots, only to have Meng come in and beat both of them of to make it a three way feud.

Hardcore Title: Meng vs. Terry Funk vs. Crowbar

Funk is defending but Meng comes in with the title. Daffney is in the aisle so Funk grabs her by the hair to draw Crowbar out for some chair shots to the champ’s head. They fight into the back and we get the women’s restroom raid. Meng finally joins them and puts Funk in a trashcan for a quick beating. They leave the restroom with Funk throwing a trashcan at Meng’s head to little avail.

Funk has his head rammed into a metal door and starts punching at the air before helping Crowbar throw a pile of tables on top of Meng. They go back into the arena with Crowbar putting Funk on a table and climbing up onto some tarped off seats (Tony: “Those are reserved seats.” Reserved for who? Elvis?) for a double legdrop.

Meng comes back and hammers on Crowbar before kicking him down the ramp. Funk is back up and hits Meng in the head with a snow shovel (thankfully sold) before slamming Crowbar through a piece of barricade (which just happened to be standing in front of the regular barricade).

Crowbar comes back (of course) and starts in on Funk’s knees as Tony makes vague references to Beyond the Mat. A Figure Four on Funk is broken up as Meng comes in off the top (!) with a splash. Funk and Crowbar take turns beating on Meng with chairs until he goes down. That’s it for them working together though as Crowbar chairs Funk, allowing Meng to blast Crowbar in the face. The Tongan Death Grip gives Meng the title.

Rating: D+. This was entertaining enough and that’s exactly what it needed to be. Having someone like Meng as champion was probably the best idea they could have gone with as the person who finally knocked him off would look like a much bigger deal as a result. The weapon stuff was fine here but more than anything else it helped to have someone so different in there. You can only watch people hit each other with chairs for so long before it loses all appeal.

Flair gives Cat and Miss Jones the rest of the night off.

Sid, still in street clothes with less than an hour and a half in the show, is ready to win the title that belongs to him.

We recap the Tag Team Titles. The Insiders won the belts twice but the Thrillers won a tag team battle royal so tonight it’s a match with any two Thrillers getting the show.

Tag Team Titles: Sean O’Haire/Chuck Palumbo vs. Insiders

Nash/Page are defending. Sanders comes out to say this isn’t going to be so easy but cue Flair to say everyone else is out so this is two on two. Page and Palumbo get things going with a slugout from the old man, followed by a clothesline. A spinning Rock Bottom gets two and a Cactus Clothesline puts them both on the floor.

Back in and a double tag brings in Nash to stare down at O’Haire, who moonsaults over Nash and superkicks him to take over for the first time. Palumbo comes in and takes clotheslines from both champs, only to have O’Haire nail Page from behind so Chuck can get in the Jungle Kick to drop Page. A double slingshot suplex (cool) gets two for the Thrillers as we hear about the RAGE building up in Kevin Nash.

Page reverses Palumbo’s tombstone into one of his own and both guys are down. O’Haire is tagged first but accidentally punches Page into the tag to Nash as everything breaks down. Cue the Thrillers as Nash powerbombs Palumbo. The referee goes after the thrillers as Lex Luger comes out to distract Page for no logical reason. This allows Buff Bagwell, dressed as a plumber, to come in and hit Nash with a wrench. The Seanton Bomb gives the Thrillers the titles. Tony: “Why Buff why?” Because he’s a heel you dingbat.

Rating: D+. Not the worst match here but WAY overbooked near the end. At least Nash took the fall, after a bunch of interference and a wrench to the back of the head of course. There’s something to be said about the fact that the Insiders got two title runs out of being transitional champions from one set of Thrillers to another. The match was what you would have expected of course.

The announcers talk about the Goldberg tag match.

Sanders says the Thrillers have plenty to celebrate tonight and Buff was acting on his own.

Flair, who apparently saw NONE of that, is off to get the Mystery Man. “It’s SHOWTIME!”

We recap Shane Douglas vs. General Rection. The General accidentally squashed Torrie Wilson to write her off TV but Shane wanted revenge in the form of that US Title. Rection kept the title at Starrcade so it’s time for a rematch with First Blood rules.

US Title: General Rection vs. Shane Douglas

Rection is defending and this is First Blood. That’s not enough though as there’s a chain hanging above the ring to make the bloodletting a bit easier. Rection wants Shane checked for a chain, which would be perfectly legal in a match like this. The referee finds one and takes it away because even the referees don’t understand the rules of the match. Since it’s a first blood match, Rection starts with a wristlock and armdrag into an armbar. Rection: “ASK HIM!” Ask him what exactly?

Tony tries to cover by saying it’s going to wear Shane down so Rection can use the heavy offense to make him bleed. Makes enough sense, marking a first in this match. Rection gets smart and punches at the forehead before blasting Shane with a top rope clothesline. No Laughing Matter gets Rection crotched and Shane starts in on the leg. This would be a much better match if it didn’t have the First Blood rule making a lot of this offense look questionable.

We hit the Figure Four on the champ (it’s horrible) for a few moments before they head outside for some play time. Shane hammers away with right hands in the crowd before wrapping the bad leg around the post. Back in and we hit the chinlock for a bit before Rection gets free and grabs a ladder. The chain is pulled down but the referee gets bumped. Shane finds the chain the referee took away from him and blasts Rection for the blood and the title.

Rating: D. Really lame First Blood match but a decent regular match. Unfortunately this was billed as something with a special gimmick and that’s not what we got here. The chain and ladder aspects didn’t need to be here and really dragged this one down but I’d rather have someone like Shane with the title than a guy named General Rection. There was just no way around that name.

Scott Steiner doesn’t care what Ric Flair puts in front of him.

Rection says it’s not worth it anymore.

We recap Totally Buff vs. Goldberg/Dewayne Bruce which is going on because WCW insisted on the feud continuing after Goldberg beat Luger twice. Luger went after Goldberg’s trainer and set up this match with the idea that they can beat Bruce and get rid of Goldberg by ending the Streak.

Totally Buff vs. Goldberg/Sgt. Dewayne Bruce

No DQ and Bruce is coming in with a broken arm. Goldberg and Luger start but the threat of a superkick sends Bagwell bailing out to the floor. A big old shoulder drops Luger to start and a butterfly suplex sends him over into the corner to Buff. Bagwell: “ME?” Goldberg: “Yeah you!”

Bagwell comes in and gets gorilla pressed into a spinebuster before it’s off to Bruce for the first time. A middle rope elbow gets two on Bagwell but Sarge runs into a double back elbow to start the obvious beating. Buff gets one off the double arm DDT with Goldberg in for the save before the referee even went down for the count. Luger’s forearm gets two and Goldberg’s kick for the save clearly didn’t make contact.

Sarge reverses a suplex to take Buff down and it’s off to Goldberg to clean house. Goldberg throws Luger to the floor where he lands right in front of the kid that Goldberg signed an autograph for earlier. The kid maces Goldberg, allowing Luger to hit him with a chair while the kid stands at ringside with security just letting him hang around. A super Blockbuster lets Luger get the pin to retire Goldberg and shock the crowd.

Rating: D-. You know who should have gotten that pin? Sean O’Haire, Mark Jindrak, or one of the other Thrillers not named Stasiak. Instead though, it’s Lex Luger, because HE needed a rub. You think this is leading anywhere for Luger? Of course not, because it’s LEX LUGER. Swap Totally Buff out for the Thrillers and let them have the meaningless Tag Team Titles while the Thrillers get to have the win that actually matters. I get that Goldberg had to leave (due to needing shoulder surgery) but they really had nothing better to do than have Lex Luger fight him for three straight pay per views? This company deserves to die.

Goldberg has his eyes washed out as the announcers talk about what a tragedy this is.

We recap the World Title match which is basically Steiner vs. the World with the question of who is Ric Flair’s Mystery Man.

WCW World Title: Scott Steiner vs. Sid Vicious vs. Jeff Jarrett vs. Mystery Man

Steiner is defending and this is one fall to a finish. There’s no Mystery Man to start so it’s a triple threat, as was advertised for a good while leading up to this show. Steiner goes after Flair so Jarrett has to bring him back to the ring where Sid is waiting on both of them. Sid gets double teamed and Jarrett is actually ok with letting Steiner go for the covers. The Push Up elbow gets two on Sid and Steiner hits him with the belt for good measure.

Jeff covers for two and this time Steiner is fine with it. Hudson: “Something is going on between Jeff Jarrett and Scott Steiner.” Sid suplexes both guys (well kind of a DDT to Steiner but close enough) and starts clotheslining. A chokeslam gets two on Jarrett and Steiner is planted with a cobra clutch slam. Jeff is whipped over the barricade and we cut to Flair getting the Mystery Man out of the limo.

We come back….and Sid’s leg is bent like a pretzel after coming off the middle rope (off camera), basically ending his full time career. Steiner does push-ups to stall while we wait on the Mystery Man before choking with his boot. Now the Mystery Man comes out (to Flair’s music) as Hudson realizes that Sid has a broken leg. The Mystery Man is in, hits Sid once, and lets Steiner pin Sid to retain.

Rating: D-. You have to forgive them for the ending as Sid’s injury took away whatever else they had planned. I’m sure the result would have been the same but it’s not fair to criticize them for having it fall this flat when Sid couldn’t move. Unfortunately you can blame them for the rest of the match with all the standing around waiting on anything interesting to happen. This wasn’t even eight minutes long and the stuff before the leg injury was barely six of that. There was no way this was going to be good and it’s made even worse with all the nonsense they packed into it.

The Mystery Man is Road Warrior Animal. Yeah, as in the guy they said was as big of a star as The Rock and Steve Austin. I’m really not sure if Tony is shooting or not as he freaks out that it’s actually Animal.

Overall Rating: D. Dang it they really can’t get out of their own way sometimes. If this show had just been altered slightly with the cruiserweight tag coming later on the show and say Cat vs. Sanders opening things up, the show would have been much easier to sit through. Unfortunately WCW has way more problems than the order of the matches though as there was just no way to get around all the horrible stuff they had to throw out there to protect the top names. It’s a bit of an upgrade but still has so many of the same problems that got them in trouble in the first place.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Nitro – January 8, 2001 (2016 Redo): How Can You Mess Up Counting Twice?

Monday Nitro #272
Date: January 8, 2001
Location: X-Cel Energy Center, St. Paul, Minnesota
Attendance: 4,500
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Disco Inferno, Tony Schiavone

We’re finally back after several weeks off and it’s the go home show for Sin. The big question is still who is the mystery man but it seems that something is up as Sid has been put in the title match on Sunday after winning last week on Thunder. Other than that we have the continuing saga of Goldberg and a career jobber masquerading as a guy we’re supposed to take seriously facing Totally Buff because Bagwell isn’t allowed loose on his own. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Ric Flair with a bunch of security to open things up. Flair says Sin is going to be the biggest pay per view of the year, which to be fair it will be so far. Of course it’s also the worst but that’s probably the case for a long time. Like, as long as it takes to get to the next WCW show. Anyway Flair thinks no one likes Sanders as Commissioner so it’s time for him to put that job on the line against the Cat.

On top of that, Sid is now in the World Title match at Sin after taking Jarrett’s place but Ric isn’t sure if Sid or Jarrett should be in the match. This brings out Jarrett, probably to yell at Flair for that statement not making sense. Jarrett says Sid DIDN’T beat him because someone interfering and hitting Sid in the back isn’t a DQ for storyline reasons. Flair doesn’t buy the idea that Steiner will be cool with Jarrett in the title match so there won’t be a three way dance.

Cue Steiner who isn’t happy with this ruling. That’s fine with Ric, who makes it a four way dance with Steiner defending against Sid, Jarrett and the Mystery Man. Scott says it’s really going to be a tag match so Flair shows us clips of Jarrett lying about being in the contenders tournament and accidentally hitting Steiner with a guitar at Starrcade. Therefore tonight, Steiner is going to face Jarrett for the title. Scott says he’s coming for Flair soon.

Goldberg arrives and wants to find Kronik.

Sanders makes Ron Harris vs. the Cat for tonight. Ron has a bit of hair here so they’re not identical.

Shane Douglas wants to be in the World Title match so Flair gives him Sid tonight. Shane: “At Sin, US Title and World Title. Never been done.” So I guess he’s next.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Shannon Moore

Non-title and Shane Helms is out for commentary. Chavo isn’t ready to go yet though as he would rather put the title on the line, meaning that if he loses tonight then Shane is left out of Sin.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Shannon Moore

Chavo is defending and gets punched out to the floor to start. Back in and some leg lariats in the corner have Chavo in trouble until he counters one into a backbreaker to take over. We hit a seated abdominal stretch from the champ for a bit before a victory roll gets two for Moore. The champ punches him down again but Moore counters a slam into a small package for two. Off to a chinlock on Shannon for all of ten seconds, followed by a springboard Fameasser for two on the champ. Shannon’s sleeper slam is broken up though and Chavo grabs a brainbuster to retain.

Rating: C+. They’re doing something interesting here with Chavo playing mind games with Shane but more importantly they have a story. After all that time of the title being worthless and having one weak story after tonight, it’s really refreshing to see some time and effort being put into things again.

Shane saves Shannon from a beatdown.

Sanders beats up Kwee Wee for no apparent reason until Big Vito makes the save for even less of a reason.

Flair is with Buff and Luger again for some reason.

Ron Harris vs. The Cat

The Twins are identical again and as you might expect, they beat Cat down to start. Ron slowly works Cat over and sends him into the barricade to avoid having to actually wrestle. Back in and Cat gets in some kicks but takes his sweet time dancing into an elbow. The Twins switch and Miss Jones’ protest lets them hit an H Bomb to give Ron the easy pin.

Post break Cat proves how awesome he is by dancing.

Hugh Morrus asks Sid to leave a little bit of Shane for him on Sunday.

Jarrett and Steiner argue. I’m sure this isn’t going to be a swerve.

Sanders is making a Minnesota Massacre match with Big Vito and Kwee Wee vs. some randomly selected opponents. The Thrillers just happen to have their gear tonight in case they’re the RANDOMLY selected opponents. Anyone who interfered in this match will be subject to every penalty Sanders can find for them.

Luger has gotten Kronik a match against Goldberg and Sarge. If they win tonight, Goldberg is fired. Kronik wants pay but apparently they’re doing their job so no pay. Disco: “THEY’RE WRESTLING FOR FREE??”

Billy Kidman vs. Lance Storm

Before the match, Storm challenges the Filthy Animals to a penalty box match, which he’s kind enough to quickly explain. Disco ignores the match to complain about Kronik wrestling for free after taking so much money from he and Alex Wright over the last month and a half. Storm shrugs off Kidman’s right hands to start and drops him ribs first over the top rope.

Awesome throws in a chair behind the referee’s back but Storm opts to wedge it in the corner instead. A Regal Roll gets two for Storm as the USA chants start up. Storm grabs an abdominal stretch for a bit before getting dropkicked out of the air to start Kidman’s comeback. The BK Bomb gets two but Storm scores with a superkick for the same. Storm gets kicked into the chair in the corner for two as Gunns pulls the referee out, triggering the required stable brawl. In the melee, Kidman hits a quick Kid Crusher for the pin.

Rating: C+. Would you expect these two to have a bad match? Storm working on the ribs to set up the eventual Mapleleaf was a good idea but you had to have the stupid brawl on the floor because that hasn’t been done to death in WCW lately. Also it’s nice to see Kidman getting wins but I’m not wild on Storm taking a pin.

Shane Douglas vs. Sid Vicious

Shane complains about being in this town and jumps Sid as he gets in the ring. They’re quickly on the floor with Sid sending him into the barricade and dropping Shane across the announcers’ table. Back in and as Disco incorrectly says Shane hasn’t had a title since he’s been in WCW as Shane pulls out the chain. That’s fine with Sid who kicks Shane in the face and drops a leg. A chokeslam drops Douglas though and the powerbomb gives Sid the easy pin.

Rating: D. Well so much for that idea. I’m very glad that the #1 contender for the US Title got squashed six days before his title shot because Sid wouldn’t have been the same otherwise. Douglas is just one of those guys who is a career midcarder outside of ECW and he’s actually growing on me in that role.

Steiner and Jarrett come out and beat Sid into the crowd after the match.

Flair says Jarrett and Steiner are suspended if they don’t try their hardest tonight. On top of that, Jim Duggan is guest referee for the Penalty Box match. Duggan just looks weird with that short hair.

Here’s Terry Funk to say he’s the king of hardcore wrestling. He’s tired of Flair giving him these nobodies like Crowbar in hardcore matches so he wants the cream of the crop. Funk wants Goldberg, Scott Steiner and Diamond Dallas Page in hardcore matches. Cue Crowbar to call Funk an old man but it wasn’t supposed to be this way. Funk says he’s the man who started ECW because he’s the extreme wrestler in the world today.

Crowbar talks about how he’s the representation of everything Funk is afraid of. As he’s talking, Daffney plays with sparklers and a Sin logo pops up with its own sound effects. Crowbar keeps being serious and says on Sunday he’s going to become the new face of the hardcore revolution. The brawl is on until Meng comes out and puts them both in the Tongan Death Grip. Daffney gets a superkick for her efforts. Meng leaves with the Hardcore Title.

Jimmy Hart DJ challenge.

Someone goes into an office and swaps an envelope from a black suit jacket. That might be the same envelope that Sanders said contained the RANDOM opponents for Vito and Kwee Wee.

Kronik vs. Goldberg/Dewayne Bruce

Bruce has a broken arm. It’s a brawl in the aisle to start with Goldberg punching Adams, leaving Clark to dismantle Bruce like the career jobber he is. The announcers basically scream at Kronik to go after Bruce until thinks settle down to Adams clotheslining Sarge for two. Bruce gets in a quick DDT and Goldberg comes in before being tagged. Yeah he already had one leg in when he was tagged but the referee is fine with all this. Goldberg cleans house as only he can but Totally Buff comes out to beat on Bruce. As this is going on, Goldberg ends Adams with the usual.

Rating: D. As was mentioned, WHY ARE THEY NOT GOING AFTER BRUCE? All you really have to do is distract Goldberg and then beat WCW’s answer to the Brooklyn Brawler and Goldberg is gone. Kronik continues to look worthless but I guess they can be credited with trying to fight Goldberg at the same time.

Totally Buff break the cast off Bruce’s arm and beat down everyone, including Kronik for some reason.

Here’s Sanders to pull the names out of the envelope for the Minnesota Massacre. The first three names drawn are Sanders himself, Chuck Palumbo, Sean O’Haire…..and the Insiders.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Kevin Nash vs. Mike Sanders vs. Chuck Palumbo vs. Sean O’Haire

Officially this is a five way last man standing match so I’m assuming elimination rules. The Thrillers work as a team of course and wrap Nash’s leg around the post before punching Page a lot. Disco: “Page is a tremendous competitor. I understand he’s been doing yoga.” O’Haire and Palumbo superkick each other so Sanders is the only man left but a low blow lets him join the club. Cue the rest of the Thrillers but Kwee Wee, Big Vito (Weren’t they guaranteed to be in this?) and Johnny the Bull cut them off. The Insiders hit their finishers on the Thrillers to win, despite it not being a team match and no counting from the referee.

Rating: F. Do you know the rules of this match? It was a five way last man standing match with two winners and no count from the referee while the people who were announced for the match weren’t actually involved. Oh and more #1 contenders get beaten down in a glorified handicap match six days before their title shot.

WCW World Title: Scott Steiner vs. Jeff Jarrett

Steiner is defending but says he doesn’t care what Ric says because he won’t fight his friend. Here’s Flair to say the title is on the line or Steiner is stripped of the belt and Jarrett is out of the Sin main event. Jarrett shoves Midajah for some reason to give Steiner even more reason to pummel him severely. Steiner drops him with a gorilla press but Jeff shrugs it off. A clothesline has a bit more effect for the champ and it’s time for the elbow drop pushups.

Jeff’s perfect dropkick puts Steiner down and a high cross body gets two on the champ. Steiner tilt-a-whirl slams him and ties Jeff in the Tree of Woe for some choking. They head outside with Jeff being sent into the barricade and slammed onto the announcers’ table. Back in and Jeff can’t get the Stroke as Steiner suplexes him instead. Cue Sid to beat on Steiner though as I guess we have a no contest.

Rating: D+. You know, it actually wasn’t out of the question to have them change the title here in a surprise and then give it back to Steiner on Sunday. Jarrett was fine here and Steiner was his normal self, even if they were just doing all their signature stuff with absolutely nothing out of the ordinary.

Now the Mystery Man comes in to beat on Jeff and a big brawl end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Standard Nitro here with nothing really standing out and WCW managing to screw up something as simple as a last man standing match. I really don’t want to see Sin as the card has the potential to be one of the worst in a long time, especially the (likely) unmasking of the Mystery Man. Bad show here but that’s really the norm these days.

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Thunder – December 20, 2000: Ending Like It Began

Thunder
Date: December 20, 2000
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Attendance: 2,872
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay, Stevie Ray

This is the final show for the year for WCW as the next two Nitros are canceled due to Christmas and New Year’s Day while next week’s Thunder is a Best Of show. Believe it or not, WCW is actually on a roll at this point, or at least as much of a roll as you can be on with one good show. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap focuses on the World Title situation which might be more interesting if Lance Storm was involved but instead we’re getting Steiner, Jarrett and another mystery man. Steiner’s last surprise challenger was Sid so this could be anyone from Rollerball Rocco to Flyboy Rocco.

Ric Flair is in the back of his limo and talks about how great the pay per view is going to be. The Mystery Man is hyped up again and we hear about tonight’s tag team battle royal.

Opening sequence.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Jamie Noble

Noble is challenging. Before the match, Chavo talks about being ready to face Shane Helms at Sin. However, if he somehow loses here, it would be a rematch at Sin and Shane would be left out in the cold. What an odd threat. Noble starts fast with a dropkick and slam before putting on a quickly broken up STF. Chavo is sent out to the floor and grabs his title but goes back inside so Noble can roll him up for two.

What appears to be a low blow puts Jamie down and Chavo’s dropkick gets two more. Jamie gets in a quick neckbreaker and fires off some right hands to send Chavo backing into the corner. Noble loads up a superplex but here’s Shane to hold Noble’s leg, allowing Chavo to send him down. A frog splash and the brainbuster retain Chavo’s title.

Rating: C. This wasn’t the most exciting match in the world but I’m really digging the storytelling here. It’s a basic, logical story that makes you wonder how Chavo is going to get out of this at Sin. That’s the kind of thing that would have done WCW a world of good in their main events over the last year or so. A lot of the time a basic story will give you more positives than almost any overly complicated story like a big swerve and a heel stable headed by a corrupt boss.

Crowbar is ready for Terry Funk at Sin.

Cat rides up to Flair on an ATV (Which you can WIN!) and asks for a match with Scott Steiner tonight. Flair, realizing that Cat has no chance of actually beating Steiner, is fine with this.

Bam Bam Bigelow is ready for Crowbar tonight.

Here’s Jim Duggan in street clothes with something to say. Duggan doesn’t want to take up too much of our time so we can get back to the show. He’s made a decision and it’s caused him some issues. About three months ago, it was decided that he needed to retire because it was past his time.

For twenty years, Duggan has shared his life with us because this is who he is. Then he made the mistake of turned his back on his country and gave up on everything. Now he needs to apologize for everything, including to his father, his wife and his children. Above all else though, he wants to apologize to the fans. After those twenty years, they deserve an apology because he can only hope they understand. I like the idea here and it’s another story that is always going to work but couldn’t this be used on someone with a bit more upside than Jim Duggan?

After a break, Duggan is leaving but Mike Awesome offers him a ride after the show is over.

The Natural Born Thrillers are ready for the battle royal and Gene Okerlund’s insults don’t seem to sway them. Stasiak insults Okerlund and that’s about it.

Hugh Morrus thanks Duggan and accepts his apology. There will be no taking Hugh’s beer though.

Tag Team Battle Royal

3 Count, Jung Dragons, Meng/Kwee Wee, Filthy Animals, Noble and Karagias, Harris Twins, Sean O’Haire/Mark Jindrak, Perfect Event

The winners get a title shot at the pay per view. The fight starts during the entrances and it only takes one member being eliminated for a team to be out. Yang is eliminated early to get rid of the Dragons and thankfully clear the ring out a bit, which would go much faster if there wasn’t a referee included.

Noble and Karagias go out next as those pesky cruiserweights are being cleared out. Everyone slowly beats on everyone until 3 Count is eliminated. This nonsense is getting ridiculous. Cue Vito to beat on Reno (standing at ringside with the Thrillers) and Johnny the Bull of all people to make a return and blast Sanders with a kendo stick.

We get a Mamalukes reunion as Meng is eliminated by the Twins, only to have them get eliminated as a result. We’re back from a break with Kidman/Mysterio, Jindrak/O’Haire and Perfect Event. The Thrillers clean house because it’s four against two meager cruiserweights. A dropkick eliminates Kidman so we’re down to the Thrillers….who split the win, basically repeating the same idea that 3 Count had in the ladder match at Starrcade.

Rating: D-. Make sure to treat those cruiserweights like they’re the most worthless things in the world. I mean you have SHAWN STASIAK out there to get a title shot and stand tall. The idea is fine but it’s really not going to hurt you to let some of the other teams look like something important on the way to having these two teams stand tall.

Sanders runs his mouth a lot post match. Apparently any two of these Thrillers will be challenging the Insiders but we won’t know until Sin. Riveting indeed.

Scott Steiner shouts that Flair doesn’t control him and he wants that Mystery Man tonight.

Konnan vs. Elix Skipper

Konnan does his catchphrases, which I really should understand by this point. They start screwing stuff up early as Konnan botches something off the ropes, prompting the camera to cut away to the crowd in a never good sign. Back with Konnan getting stomped down and put in a chinlock for a bit. The rolling clothesline and a reverse DDT put Elix down, only to have him get to the apron for a springboard missile dropkick. We hit the chinlock again because Konnan needs to rest three minutes in. A springboard legdrop gets two for Skipper but Konnan hits another rolling lariat and grabs the Tequila Sunrise for the tap out.

Rating: D-. And that’s ALL on Konnan, who looked like a disaster out there, barely being able to do anything without being worn out in a short TV match. Skipper was doing his usual stuff but Konnan is a big deal in another country so it’s time for Elix to lose cleanly. Thanks for the cool spots but drawing power from years ago is all that matters.

Jeff Jarrett is ready for Scott Steiner at Sin. I can’t believe we have to sit through more Jarrett main events. Was anyone asking for that?

The Misfits yell at Hugh Morrus over him accepting Duggan’s apology while turning his back on Chavo. Morrus says the difference is Chavo not realizing what he’s doing is wrong. Point to Morrus on that one.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Crowbar

Bigelow is still limping. Crowbar is quickly thrown into the corner for an Avalanche because what else is someone Bigelow’s size going to do at this point in his career. A huge toss sends Crowbar flying but Bigelow makes the mistake of screaming at Daffney who easily destroys him with some more vocal eruptions. Crowbar gets smart and goes after the knee before they take it outside. Bigelow sends him into the barricade but gets his eyes raked by the banshee, allowing Crowbar to chop block him down. Cue Meng to lay out Crowbar, allowing Bigelow to mostly botch Greetings From Asbury Park for the quick pin.

Rating: D. I’m not sure what’s worse: Bigelow going over Crowbar or the fact that these two just had a better match without weapons than they’ve had with them in what feels like years. These guys are capable of wrestling a coherent match with a simple story in Bigelow’s knee injury but for some reason they’re stuck with the weak weapons stuff most of the time.

Norman Smiley is still too excited about Glacier returning but is told he has a match. It’s a makeup match from a few weeks ago.

Norman Smiley vs. Goldberg

Norman is in street clothes. Goldberg actually gives him a few seconds before the spear and Jackhammer make it 33-0.

Shane Douglas pays Kronik off.

The sitdown interview this week is with Ric Flair, who won’t say who the Mystery Man is despite Tenay asking him over and over. Why Ric just doesn’t say “it’s a MYSTERY” isn’t clear. Flair praises Steiner’s abilities but says the title has a big target that comes with it. The title is all that matters though, unlike this interview which was the same stuff that Flair has been saying for weeks now.

Ernest Miller is ready for his title shot.

Shane Douglas/Kronik vs. Filthy Animals

Shane does the same promo he always does before the match, which to be fair still works well enough. Douglas is about to start with Morrus but brings in Adams before there’s any contact. I’m not a Shane fan but he knows how to use the most basic heel stuff to good results. Morrus clotheslines Adams and brings in Lash for an ax handle.

The dancing punches don’t seem to work so Lash settles for kicking Adams low. It’s not exactly a crushing blow however as Adams takes over with an easy slam and brings in Clark for the first time. Lash’s offense has about as much effect as you would expect so it’s off to Wall for a showdown that could set wrestling back a hundred years.

Clark uses a drop toehold of all things so he can tag in Shane for the reverse Hennig necksnap. Raise your hand if that’s the sequence you were expecting. Wall gets in a spinebuster on Shane as everything breaks down. Clark gives Lash a Meltdown for no cover, followed by Morrus slamming Shane and hitting the moonsault for two. Adams cleans house with a chair though and the Franchiser puts Morrus away to give us a reason for a rematch at Sin.

Rating: D+. This actually didn’t suck as they went with a simple formula until right up to the ending. Kronik as partners for hire isn’t the worst idea in the world and it’s a lot better than having them be paid off for half of a fifteen minute match and not being able to read a stopwatch. Douglas isn’t great either but he’s as good as any other midcard heel so him getting Morrus again worse as well as anything else would.

Post break, Morrus yells at the Misfits.

Here’s Team Canada with something to say. After the now traditional complaining about the Presidential elections, Storm rips on Duggan for turning his back on Canada. Of course cue Duggan again and amazingly the fans go INSANE with patriotism. By that I mean they do nothing and WCW pipes in USA chants. Duggan goes in for the fight and hangs on, only to have Mike Awesome come in and take him out to become the newest member of the team.

Post break, Awesome declares himself the Canadian Career Killer. I would have gone with the guy fighting to become World Champion because he’s the kind of guy that might get some attention because he’s an athletic freak but this is a major step up from That 70s Guy.

WCW World Title: Scott Steiner vs. The Cat

Cat is challenging of course. Steiner pounds him in the back and stomps Cat in the corner because this is Scott Steiner vs. the Cat. The Push-Up elbow gets two and a backbreaker allows Scott to yell at Ms. Jones. Cat comes back with a few kicks, including one to put Steiner on the floor. We get the catfight as Cat stays on Steiner, including a shot to the throat back inside. Never mind though as we get the spinning belly to belly, only to have the Mystery Man come out and distract Steiner, setting up the Feliner for two. A t-bone suplex sets up the Recliner and we’re done.

Rating: D. Yeah this was exactly what you would expect with the Cat basically getting destroyed and only a few kicks keeping this from being a squash. At the very least, and I do mean VERY least, Cat is able to work a match without looking like he’s about to have a mild heart attack during the match. That’s something isn’t it?

Steiner chases after the Mystery Man to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. They’ve had worse shows but it’s definitely a big letdown after Monday. This was all about the questionable decisions like having Konnan go over Skipper clean and WCW thinking Bam Bam Bigelow is anything but nostalgia in the year 2000. It’s a pretty standard WCW show for the time: a decent opener and then a bunch of uninspiring stories centered around people who aren’t all that interesting in the first place.

That’s it for WCW 2000 as the only thing left is a Best of Thunder show and I don’t think anyone is going to be wanting to read that. This year is definitely divided into different sections. The earliest part of the year, as in from the start up through Russo/Bischoff resetting things, is flat out boring. The stories weren’t any good and the shows were just big wastes of time as Sid held the title for months at a time.

Then it was the New Blood Era where we were supposed to buy that the younger guys were important, even though it was Jeff Jarrett and his thirteen year career running things for the new generation. The rest of the main event was all the old guys being treated as the heroes while the actual new blood was lucky to get a midcard title shot here and there. On top of that you had Russo and Bischoff turning the show into a circus as the fans turned away in droves.

Oh and always remember: Vince Russo is MANLY and can hold on in the Figure Four for over a minute because even though there was a problem in there, they couldn’t possibly change the story to protect the move and make Russo look like any normal person in one of the most famous finishing holds of all time.

Then Russo left and Booker T. won the World Title a few times and things got a little bit better, only to have him drop it to Scott Steiner (which was fine) to make sure the most technically sound main eventer they had went away. Booker winning was a genuinely cool moment as he remains one of the only people in WCW to have a traditional rise up the card before winning the title. After that, the show fell back into the same problems it had earlier in the year: boring stories, lame wrestling, the entertaining people being shoved to the side so the “draws” could get all the glory.

WCW was almost entirely dead coming into 2000 and their Hail Mary of Russo and Bischoff working together failed more spectacularly than anyone could have ever imagined. The company was more than living on borrowed time and they didn’t do themselves any favors by going with the things people didn’t want to see while getting rid of the stuff that wasn’t like the WWF. Yeah Raw was on fire at this point, but WCW was standing in the way of the flames to burn themselves alive. This year was nothing short of a disaster all around and a fitting way to set up the final months of the company.

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Starrcade 2000 (2016 Redo): They Used To Be Good At This

Starrcade 2000
Date: December 17, 2000
Location: MCI Center, Washington, D.C.
Attendance: 6,596
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden, Scott Hudson

We’ve uh…..arrived. It’s the final edition of WCW’s flagship show and it’s looking somewhere between a bad C show and a horribly unfunny joke. The main event is Scott Steiner (won the title three weeks ago) defending against Sid Vicious (not in the promotion three weeks ago). Such is life in the dying days of this company. Let’s get to it.

Before we start, here’s a good idea of how bad it’s gotten for WCW. The attendances for the last four Starrcades, all in the same arena.

1997 – 17,500

1998 – 16,066

1999 – 8,582

2000 – 6,596

In three years, the attendance has fallen by nearly two thirds. That’s impossible to defend.

The opening video makes this look even more of a disaster than it’s likely going to be.

3 Count vs. Noble and Karagias vs. Jung Dragons

Ladder match for the #1 contendership, which will somehow be give to one man, making me wonder why this isn’t just a six way match. Champion Chavo Guerrero Jr. is on commentary. Oh and they’re starting with tags because LADDER MATCHES (remember that this is after the first TLC match) needs law and order. Kaz and Moore hit the mat to start until they crash into each other to put both guys down.

Shannon goes for the ladder but Evan will have none of that because that’s not how a well organized ladder match is supposed to go. Everyone goes for the ladders and it’s 3 Count sneaking in to go up at the same time until the Dragons make the save. Yang dropkicks a ladder into Noble and Karagias, followed by Kaz moonsaulting onto the ladder and the two of them. A double flapjack sends Kaz into the ladder but Evan pulls Noble down, making the entire idea of the match a waste of time.

Yang sends Noble hard into the ladder and busts out Yang Time (phoenix splash) off a ladder on the middle rope to crush Shannon. Shane is back up and sends Yang to the floor for a big flip dive of his own. That’s the start of the big set of dives (Chavo: “Keep killing yourselves boys.”) until Yang shoves Noble off the ladder and onto the pile for a great crash. Yang bridges a ladder into another one but Evan slides back in for a suplex.

With Evan on the bridged ladder, Kaz tries to springboard in, only to get powerslammed out of the air for a great looking landing. Shannon springboards onto the ladder for a Fameasser onto Evan, leaving Shane to grab a neckbreaker to bring Noble off the ladder. Yang, Noble and 3 Count go up two different ladders so Noble sunset bombs Helms down and Shannon plants Yang with a sleeper drop.

Cue Leia to go after Noble as two more ladders are brought in. Yang flips Evan off a ladder in the corner and into a Kaz powerbomb (cool spot) before erecting a scaffold with one ladder bridged into three others. I’ve heard worse ideas actually. Noble and Karagias take out 3 Count before Kaz gets knocked off the scaffold. That leaves Shane and Yang on the scaffold, allowing Shannon to headscissor Yang down for another crash. Jamie gets hiptossed off as well, leaving 3 Count to pull down the contract at the same time, again defeating the point of the stipulations one more time.

Rating: B. It has nothing on any of the WWF counterparts but this was a bunch of fun spots with six guys who wanted to show off out there. As always you can see people trying their hardest instead of just phoning it in as so often happens. Oh and well done having this match go on first so that it’s going to be forgotten an hour and a half into the show while Bam Bam Bigelow or Shane Douglas are out there as the midcard draws because WCW exists as a haven for people like them.

Jim Duggan is polishing his board (dude CLOSE THE DOOR) when Lance Storm comes in to say no one is going to take Jim back. If Duggan wants a paycheck, his future is with Team Canada. After all those times where Duggan has screwed up, why would Storm want him around?

Jeff Jarrett asks Mike Sanders to make the six man against the Filthy Animal a Bunkhouse street fight.

Kronik is in a steam room and will be getting paid tonight, cash in hand. Adams: “Wow, am I baked.”

Lance Storm vs. The Cat

No Duggan with the Canadians here. Storm has something to say before the match, which Hudson calls a Canadian gimmick. Lance rips on the Presidential elections again so here’s Cat to do his usual “I’m going to beat you up” stuff. They start slowly with a lockup on the ropes and a clean break. You really can feel the hatred here. An armdrag puts Storm down but he comes right back with a wristlock.

That earns him a few kicks to the chest but Major Gunns grabs Cat’s foot, nearly triggering a catfight. Tony: “Speaking of accidental and speaking of cleavage.” The women get inside for no action until Storm takes over with a jawbreaker. You know, as part of the wrestling match. Storm spends too much time yelling to the crowd and has to kick out of a small package. Cat throws him into the air for a low blow (with the referee cringing) before being sent outside to hit Skipper in the head with a bottle of water.

Now the women actually get involved as Jones accidentally kicks Cat, earning herself a dropkick from Gunns. Back in and Storm missile dropkicks Cat for no count as the referee is still getting up. Cue Duggan to pull back the board to hit Cat but instead it’s a halfhearted clothesline to set up the Mapleleaf to make Cat tap.

Rating: D. Not the worst match in the world but I’m getting tired of having everyone having to work down to Cat’s level. Storm should be able to fly around with anyone but he’s stuck with this dancing goon who can’t work a straight seven minute match because it’s beyond his physical capabilities. Now can we PLEASE get Duggan on to something else?

Team Canada beats Duggan down post match.

The ambulance arrives.

Buff Bagwell, now an interviewer, says he had to be on the show to draw a rating because pay per views have ratings. The Filthy Animals come in and aren’t worried about Jarrett and the Harris Twins no matter what the stipulations are.

Reno and Vito tell the Thrillers to mind their own business tonight.

Hardcore Title: Terry Funk vs. Crowbar

Crowbar is defending but first Daffney has to yell at him over the 70s clothes. Thankfully Funk jumps him with a fire extinguisher to get things going in the back. Funk sends him into various objects for two as Hudson tries to figure out how Terry got a shot after just coming back. Uh, I believe it’s because Crowbar said “yeah you can have a title shot.” That gem is followed up by Tony talking about Terry retiring the same year that Starrcade debuted and having a title match seventeen years later.

They fight in the back of a production truck as Hudson gets the date of Clash of the Champions IX: New York Knockout wrong. Crowbar gets hiptossed out of the truck and through a table but comes back by slamming a door onto Funk’s head. Funk pops up and does the same thing to Crowbar a few times over as Hudson says Crowbar is someone’s son. You know, because Funk isn’t.

Funk handcuffs him and blasts Crowbar in the head with a chair because the 1999 Royal Rumble is ripe for nostalgia. They head into the arena (not back into the arena Tony) with Funk bringing a car door with him to blast Crowbar in the head again. Now it’s time for a table (ignore the thing bending in the middle along a line that clearly shows it’s pre-cut) but Daffney pulls Crowbar off.

Terry goes after her but I’m sure he’s still the face in the match because he’s old and therefore awesome. Crowbar, still handcuffed, fights up and dives through Funk and the table for two. Another chair shot to the head sets up a piledriver onto the door to give Funk the pin and the title.

Rating: D. So Crowbar is built up as something special in the hardcore division and then he faces a legend and loses in a glorified squash. But hey, another old name gets to be a champion in WCW and that’s what really matters. This is another head shake inducing moment and that’s the sad part about WCW.

Storm rants about Duggan still being American and says it’s time for Team Canada to move forward. Gunns screws up her only line so Gene tells her he’s got a pole she can run that Canadian flag up.

Lex Luger has brass knuckles ready for Goldberg.

Kronik vs. Big Vito/Reno

Before the match, Adams implies that Marie is the one paying them off. It’s a brawl to start as Hudson suggests that Marie being the one behind this could be the story of the year. Is it even the story of the match? Vito powerslams Clark and drops a leg for two before Reno gets the same off a neckbreaker. An elbow stops Clark’s comeback as Adams goes outside to yell at Marie. Vito goes to save his sister but the distraction lets Clark get in his flip dive from the apron.

Back in and Vito clotheslines Adams for two as we’re just waiting for the big swerve. A full nelson slam and belly to back suplex drop Vito for two and it’s off to a chinlock because this wasn’t slow enough already. Cue the Thrillers to distract Reno so Kronik can get in a double big boot to Vito. A double cross body body puts Vito and Clark down and it’s the tag to Reno, who immediately Rolls the Dice on Vito…..for a pinfall. Good thing they went that long before doing something else stupid.

Rating: F+. I hate these stories because it sets up the potential of something interesting and then rips it away in the span of a few weeks. Why bother having them get back together if they’re going to be split up just a few weeks later to get us back to where we started? Why bother having them even be brothers in the first place? Huge waste of time here and a bad match on top of that.

Post match Reno pays Kronik off and rejoins the Thrillers, making this whole story a complete waste of time. Kronik beats Vito up a bit more.

3 Count argues over who gets the title shot tomorrow night so Chavo comes in and beats them down.

Hugh Morrus goes on a rant about how he’s not going to be a stepping stone for Shane Douglas.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Mike Awesome

Ambulance match because that’s what Awesome does, or at least did months ago before the 70s nonsense. Madden: “Mike Awesome has never won an ambulance match.” But it’s his SPECIALTY right? Awesome climbs the buckle for a jumping back elbow to the face to start but Bigelow takes it outside and drives Awesome into the post. Bigelow sets up a chair in the aisle and they ram each other into the side of the ambulance.

Awesome ducks a right hand to send Bigelow’s fist through the window so let’s go back to the ring because this thing MUST KEEP GOING. Both guys are sent into the announcers’ table before Bigelow backdrops him through a regular table. They head back to the ambulance (with the driver still in the cab looking more bored than most of the fans) and Bigelow goes up top, only to be knocked through the roof to give Awesome the win.

Rating: F. Just nothing here with both guys beating on each other minus any particular rhyme or reason. I don’t know why I’m supposed to care about these hardcore guys when Bigelow is WAY over the hill, Awesome has been a comedy guy for months and Terry Funk is the champion after having beaten the other 70s guy. I’m sick of these matches eating up so much time and going nowhere but it was something in ECW and that’s what matters I guess.

Reno says the Thrillers are his real family. Sanders and the Perfect Event are sure they’ll retain the titles. Gene promises to slap Stasiak one day.

US Title: Shane Douglas vs. Hugh Morrus

Morrus is defending and we’ll go with the old name because they’re being used interchangeably at this point. Shane promises to rip a hole in Morrus’ heart, meaning it won’t take 36 days to determine who won this contest. A bunch of chops don’t do much damage to Morrus early on but a poke to the eye works a bit better. We almost get a crash into the referee but the second attempt hits Shane as it was supposed to. A low blow and right hands have no effect either so Hugh grabs a bearhug. This draws a GOLDBERG chant of all things until Shane finally bites his way out.

No Laughing Matter is broken up and Shane gets in a piledriver but opts to pose instead of covering. Off to a neck crank for a bit before they go back outside for more nothing. Shane goes hard into the post to draw some blood (hardway it seems) but another moonsault misses. That means it’s chain time but Morrus breaks it up with a belly to back suplex. Cue Chavo to throw the chain back to a stunned Douglas…..before telling the referee about it to draw a DQ.

Rating: D-. Gah this story continues to do nothing for me. Shane Douglas really isn’t interesting but Morrus is even worse now that he’s finished with the war against Canada. I still don’t see Morrus as someone who should be at this level either and it’s really hard to buy him here. Unfortunately he’s one of WCW’s only options as everyone on the roster is FIRMLY stuck in the places with little opportunity to move up without turning 40 years old.

Shane beats on him with the chain post match until Chavo comes in for the failed save. The Misfits come in to clear Shane out but Lash sides with Chavo and AWALL sides with Morrus.

Steiner goes on about how he’s going to win tonight and then have a great night with the freaks.

Glacier is still coming back.

Nash and Page laugh off the idea of Perfect Event as any kind of a threat and make jokes with Buff.

Jeff Jarrett/Harris Twins vs. Filthy Animals

Bunkhouse street fight, meaning the third hardcore based match assuming you ignore the ladder match. There are weapons all around and in the ring, including a bar and a popcorn machine. The Animals quickly clean house as Tygress sits in on commentary. The spray painted trashcans have the Nashville World Order (commentators’ words) as this is even more mindless brawling.

Jarrett is sent face first into the popcorn and the Twins both get Bronco Busters. Back in and Jarrett gets slammed off the middle rope and through the bar for two. Well at least the wood erupting looked good. Rey comes off the top with an atomic Arabian facebuster with a Wrong Way sign on Don. There’s nothing going on between these big spots other than some punches and kicks.

Jarrett finally counters a hurricanrana and powerbombs Rey over the top into a dumpster. The match actually settles down into a regular tag match because the words STREET FIGHT are lost about seven minutes in. A double big boot drops Kidman as the fans start getting into things. It’s almost like presenting old school wrestling on a wrestling show instead of hardcore match after hardcore match is a good idea. Ron cuts off a hot tag attempt and hands it back to Jarrett for a chinlock.

Kidman finally flips out and grabs a Bodog, setting up the hot tag off to Konnan. You can actually see the fans paying attention and caring about the match with such a simple story. Take that Russo. The H-Bomb puts Konnan down and it’s table time but Rey comes out of the dumpster with a broom for a double clothesline. Another H Bomb puts Rey through a table though, leaving Kidman mostly on his own. The Kid Crusher looks to set up the shooting star but a bottle to the head lets Jarrett get in the Stroke for the pin.

Rating: C. Other than the ladder match, I think I liked the wrestling section in the middle of this match better than anything else on the show tonight. It was so nice to hit the brakes for a bit and just watch something out of a wrestling match. But hey, where would we be without an exploding bar and a popcorn machine?

Sarge thinks Goldberg is ready for Luger. Lex runs in and beats him down until Buff gets rid of him.

We cut away from this and look at the weapons being taken away.

The announcers talk about Goldberg to kill time.

Tag Team Titles: Insiders vs. Perfect Event

Perfect Event is defending and this is a rematch from last month where the Insiders won the titles but had them stripped away because they pinned the wrong man. Before the match, Flair says the title change hands if Sanders goes anywhere near the ring. You know, aside from being at ringside as a manager. Nash and Palumbo get things going with Kevin hitting some running clotheslines in the corner.

Chuck wants a timeout so Stasiak gets in a cheap shot from the apron, only to have Page get tagged in a few seconds later for a flying shoulder. Page ducks a boot in the corner and crotches Stasiak against the post. A belly to belly gets two but Shawn gets out of the Diamond Cutter. Page hits a quick Rock Bottom (called a chokeslam which is close enough) but Palumbo sneaks in with a Jungle kick to put Page down.

After a few near falls, Page throws Palumbo into the corner for some right hands, only to be thrown into the wrong corner for a double stomping. Some kicks to the ribs have Page in trouble because a three year old injury still isn’t fully healed. That’s a very slow healing injury. Palumbo hits him low to stop a comeback but a single forearm allows the tag off to Nash.

Sanders low blows Page on the floor and Stasiak gets two off a top rope clothesline. The camera misses a Diamond Cutter to Stasiak on the floor (because Page doesn’t sell low blows) and here are Jindrak and O’Haire to get laid out as well. Nash kicks Chuck in the face and the Jackknife gives the Insiders the titles back.

Rating: D+. The match was actually decent with the old school formula but the same problem stands: the Insiders, a team thrown together about five weeks ago, have now decisively beaten the Thrillers twice in a row to give them another unnecessary title. As late as it is, this is another on the long list of things that killed WCW. At some point, you have to have these old guys lay down and take a big fall from someone under the age of thirty.

Recap of Goldberg vs. Luger, which is happening because Luger was a big deal ten years ago and therefore should have a prominent role on the show instead of having Goldberg winning the title like he should. Goldberg beat Luger last month but a referee was speared so it should have been a DQ, requiring this rematch. There’s also been stuff with Luger beating up Goldberg’s trainer to try to add more interest to a match no one wanted to see in the first place, let alone a rematch.

Goldberg vs. Lex Luger

No DQ to add a fourth hardcore based match on a ten match card. They fight at the announcers’ table to start with Goldberg easily taking over. A clothesline puts Luger down in the ring and a powerslam puts him out on the floor. Luger sends him into the post and barricade so here are Sarge and Bagwell for no apparent reason.

Back in and Luger hides behind the referee to avoid the spear before the brass knuckles knock Goldberg silly for two. The Blockbuster hits Goldberg “by mistake”, ignoring the fact that Luger was touching the turnbuckle when Bagwell jumped. Bagwell hits Sarge to officially turn heel, leaving Goldberg to hit the two moves to reach 31-0.

Rating: D. Just like last month, no one cares about Luger but for some reason he was pushed in this spot instead of having Goldberg get a major push and win the title again as he should have done. The Sarge stuff was fine but there was no logical reason to have Luger here. Goldberg is way past the point of needing a worthless rub from Lex Luger and since we need Sid in the main event, here’s what we’re stuck with for no apparent reason. The match was a somewhat passable brawl but Goldberg squashed him for the most part, as you would expect.

Bagwell lays Goldberg out with the chair post match.

We recap Sid Vicious vs. Scott Steiner. Basically Sid never lost the title back in April, then he disappeared for about seven months and came back to fight Steiner here. That’s really about it for the story, which sums up this show so well.

WCW World Title: Scott Steiner vs. Sid Vicious

Sid is challenging. Steiner pounds him into the corner to start but Sid catches him with some clotheslines and a side slam to send the champ outside. Back in and Steiner poses a lot before easily winning a test of strength. Sid gets back up and puts Scott down, setting up a legdrop across the face for two.

They head outside where Midajah gets in a steel pipe to Sid’s back, followed by some chair shots from Steiner. Back in and Steiner easily presses Sid for a few curls, followed by the spinning belly to belly. The Recliner goes on but Sid is too close to the ropes to make sure this continues.

Scott gets it on again and good grief it looks HORRIBLE as Sid’s back is straight and Steiner is clearly not even pulling back. You can make that hold look devastating but this is worse than Rock’s Sharpshooter ever hoped to be. Sid starts to fight back so Midajah comes off the top for a high cross body which hits the champ by mistake. The chokeslam (Sid’s back is fine. Why are you asking?) gets two on Steiner so we hit a cobra clutch of all things.

Steiner slaps the referee before getting slammed, meaning there’s no count. Pipe to the back gets two and here’s Jarrett with the guitar to hit Scott by mistake. In an awesome moment, Sid covers for two but Jeff pulls Robinson to the floor and tries a clothesline, only to have Robinson duck underneath and slide back in for the two count. Two low blows set up a t-bone suplex and the Recliner makes Sid pass out (of course) to retain.

Rating: D. And that’s probably very generous. The highlight of this match was a referee ducking a clothesline and sliding back into the ring to count a near fall. Not the wrestling, not the brawling and not the finish, but a referee. Among its many obvious problems, the issue here was how nothing this match was. There’s no reason for these two to really be fighting other than the title being stripped eight months ago and that’s barely been mentioned. This whole main event has been treated like an afterthought and that’s perfect after this mess of a show.

Steiner holds up the belt, with one of the side plates hanging off, and flips off the fans to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. You can add Starrcade to the list of things that this company has wrecked. Looking at the show and its buildup, this was just about exactly what I expected. The main event was nothing, Goldberg’s match was an excuse to have Luger on the show for whatever reason……and I’m already having issues thinking of the rest of the card because it was that forgettable.

The show felt like a card they scraped together with whatever leftovers they had at the time and then slapped STARRCADE on the marquee. Nothing on this show felt like it mattered or seemed important or had any other purpose than making sure the same people were in the same spots as we head into 2001. The really fun ladder match at the beginning was forgotten by the end of the show due to all of the other hardcore messes in the middle, which was probably the idea at some point. Why let them get over when the made men can get over even more?

Above all else, this show was disappointing. Any given Wrestlemania card can be lackluster and still feel like something special on the strength of being Wrestlemania alone. That should be the case with Starrcade but I might as well have been watching Uncensored or Souled Out with what we got here.

What happened on this show? Steiner retains the title, Sid is treated like a nothing wrestler (fair enough), Goldberg wins as he always does, we’ve set up a tag match involving a career jobber who is now a big deal because he trains wrestlers, the Insiders got the titles back and Rey Mysterio was powerbombed into a dumpster. Why not have Steiner win the title here instead of at Mayhem? Ah yes, because Mayhem fit his name and that’s going to save the company. Steiner winning like a monster is fine but give him the big moment at the big show instead of at the nothing show.

This show was a huge mess but in a different and much more disappointing way than the Russo shows. Those things were all about someone having no idea what he was doing flying off a cliff because no one told him no. This show was a bunch of people who might have been interesting at some point giving up and just fulfilling obligations with no ambition or plans on how to make things feel interesting or important for the fans. Here lies Starrcade and it’s very sad to see it go down like this.

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Thunder – December 6, 2000: Ric Flair Changes His Mind

Thunder
Date: December 6, 2000
Location: Pershing Auditorium, Lincoln, Nebraska
Attendance: 3,433
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay, Stevie Ray

I’m really not sure what to talk about with this one. As weak as Monday Nitro has gotten in recent weeks it’s almost scary to think about how bad Thunder could get at this point. We’re getting closer to Starrcade and the night of many rematches, which is exactly what I want to see after such a horrible Mayhem. Let’s get to it.

Long Nitro recap opens things up.

Ric Flair is on his way to the ring.

Stevie Ray comes out to take over Madden’s spot because…..well it’s an upgrade in a way.

Here’s Ric Flair with something to say. After what happened on Monday, Scott Steiner and Sid aren’t allowed here tonight. That’s not all though: due to Steiner attacking Arn Anderson, he’s stripped of the World Title. This brings out Mike Sanders to say that Flair is just jealous of Steiner’s body but Ric tells him to keep bringing the insults. Cue Arn Anderson on the screen to say he can take care of Sanders anytime. Steiner should keep the title though because if they’re going to take him down, it might as well be when he’s on top. This is of course enough to change Flair’s mind and Steiner is champion again.

Post break, Flair makes Sanders vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr. for the Cruiserweight Title.

Crowbar tells Daffney he has a new outfit for her.


AWALL doesn’t like Chavo’s new attitude.

Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire vs. Noble and Karagias

Noble gets annoyed at Karagias for dancing to the ring. Jindrak and O’Haire throw both guys over the top but spend too much time posing, allowing the small guys to come back in with dropkicks. That means it’s time to drive the Cadillac before Noble starts with Jindrak. Jamie’s top rope clothesline gets two but Evan tags himself in for a springboard cross body. O’Haire gets in a great looking gorilla press into a Falcon’s Arrow as Tony goes on about how much better Jindrak and O’Haire are because of their size.

Noble takes a middle rope Hennig neck snap followed by a tilt-a-whirl slam for no cover. Evan comes in off the hot tag and faceplants Jindrak before pulling out a ladder to take out both Thrillers. Yeah sure why not. Noble and Karagias argue over the ladder though, allowing Sean to clothesline both of them down. The double toss sends Karagias inside and another puts Noble on top of him. A top rope hurricanrana sets up the Seanton Bomb to pin Noble.

Rating: C+. Jindrak and O’Haire looked awesome here and are pretty easily the best team in the company right now, of course save for the two old guys who squashed 3 Count after taking the belts from Perfect Event at Mayhem. I’m sure the rematch will be FAR more competitive though and O’Haire and Jindrak will be treated as serious challengers.

Whoever hired Kronik on Nitro has another job for them tonight.

Shane Douglas is ready for Morrus at Starrcade and Goldberg tonight.

Sgt. AWALL vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Winner gets Crowbar for the Hardcore Title at Starrcade so Crowbar is on commentary. Daffney has on her 60s attire because WCW can’t even get old school fashion right. They start with the usual weapons exchanges as this hopefully doesn’t go on very long. A trashcan lid shot takes Bigelow down and it’s already table time. AWALL takes too much time setting everything up though and gets sent over the announcers’ table. That’s not enough though as Bigelow sends him into the regular table for a bonus. Cue Mike Awesome with a chair to knock both guys out though and that’s a no contest in a hardcore match.

Rating: D-. More of the same here but now they’re having no contests in matches designed to have the toughest guys in wrestling. To the shock of no one who pays attention, Crowbar was the highlight here as he was basically doing an over the top Gordon Solie impression, which of course made him funnier than any commentator has been in years.

The Filthy Animals arrive but get jumped by Jeff Jarrett and the Harris Twins.

The Cat talks strategy with the Jung Dragons……who don’t understand English. It’s funny you see.

Video on Sid vs. Steiner.

Buff Bagwell goes on a rant about how tired he is of jobbing to B-Level talent like Scott Steiner. Tonight he has Alex Wright which doesn’t make things any better. This feels like a flashback to the Russo days and that’s not a good thing.

Team Canada vs. The Cat/Jung Dragons

Before the match, Storm implies that he’s going to punish Duggan for screwing up on Monday in the near future. Kaz starts with Skipper who avoids an early clothesline with a Matrix move. Yang comes in and hammers away in the corner so Skipper shoves him away and it’s off to Duggan. That goes as far as you would expect so Storm comes in for a jawbreaker. There’s the Mapleleaf but everything breaks down and the referee doesn’t see Yang tap. An enziguri drops Storm so it’s off to Cat for some shots to Skipper’s head. Everyone else fights on the floor and the Feliner puts Skipper away.

Rating: D. As usual, not enough time for this to go anywhere but at least Storm didn’t take another completely unnecessary pin. If they want Duggan out of there so badly just throw him out already instead of having the team take all these losses in a row. It’s nice to see the Dragons getting a few wins but there’s no way it turns into anything important.

Storm blames Duggan post match and the winners dance a lot.

Post break Storm tells Duggan he’s done for the night.

Vito and Marie argue about Reno.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Mike Sanders

Sanders is defending and the Thrillers are banned from ringside. Chavo takes him to the mat to start and gets in a kick to the back. A whip sends Sanders chest first into the buckle and there’s a belly to back to keep him in trouble. Sanders gets in a release pumphandle slam to take over, followed by the shaky fist drop.

We hit a cobra clutch to fill in some time They head outside with Sanders being sent into the barricade as this hasn’t been the most competitive or interesting match so far. Back in and Chavo dropkicks him into the corner before a northern lights suplex gets two. The referee pulls Sanders away and Chavo gets in a quick belt shot, setting up a brainbuster for the pin and the title.

Rating: C-. The match was nothing to see but the ending was the exactly right call. Chavo is getting better every single week and Sanders only held the title as a joke for the last few weeks. I’m liking the idea of Chavo as a heel and he can more than back it up in the ring so this is a good result all around, even if the match was nothing to see.

Post break, Chavo says he won and screw the Misfits.

Sanders is livid.

Disco Inferno tells Alex Wright that he has a plan but Wright wants to do things himself.

Now we get a somewhat infamous moment as the Insiders talk about their history, which includes A LOT of references to Scott Hall. However, WCW had instituted a ban on any mentions of Hall so the name is edited every time, basically making this look like a bad comedy sketch. Oh and the lighting is all screwy because WCW can’t even get a light bulb right.

Anyway the interview itself is about what you would expect: they talk about how they came together after Page was coming back from his injury (Battledome sequence ignored of course) and their history with censored. The Hall stuff is much more odd as they talk about how much they want him back and how important he was to their careers but the editing makes it sound like they’re talking about some illegal drug. They make fun of Stevie Ray (the interviewer) a bit to wrap things up.

Lex Luger is reading Goldberg’s book and doesn’t seem happy.

Alex Wright vs. Buff Bagwell

Disco is on commentary. Buff dropkicks him a few times to start but eats a quick leg lariat. I’ve always liked that move. That means it’s time for a very early chinlock which goes nowhere of course. Why would you even use that move, knowing it’s just going to make a face come back? Wright dives onto a raised boot and misses a dropkick, setting up the Blockbuster for a quick pin.

Bryan Clark vs. Big Vito

This is supposed to be one on one but both members of the team beat Vito down on the floor to start. Clark finally takes him inside but Vito grabs a snap suplex. The top rope elbow connects, only to have Vito come up holding his knee. They seem to go home really fast as Clark hits a quick Meltdown for the pin.

Post match Reno comes in for the save and it’s a big family moment.

The Thrillers yell at Reno for making the save in the back.

Here’s Shane Douglas for the main event but first of all he has something to say. Apparently everyone here in Nebraska who can afford television knows what General Rection did to Torrie Wilson (“my meal ticket”) but the same people cheer for him. Great things happen in great places like New York, Los Angeles and Pittsburgh, but tonight the fans here in Nebraska get to see something special.

Shane talks about how he’s going to beat Goldberg tonight and then tries to start a GOLDBERG chant. Somehow this makes Stevie talk about Shane being kicked out of college for his attitude. He goes on even more about how he’ll win the title at Starrcade and then calls Goldberg out again. This went almost five minutes and really felt like they were stretching to fill in time.

Goldberg vs. Shane Douglas

Shane gets smart by wrapping the chain around his hand before the bell. Three straight chain shots actually put Goldberg down but here’s Luger with Sarge in the Rack on the stage. Goldberg starts to go for the save (in slow motion) but Shane jumps him from behind. That earns him a quick spear (really good one too) and Jackhammer, allowing Goldberg to get win #29 and then run up for the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Somehow this was an improvement over recent weeks. The problem here is the same as it has been lately: at some point, we’re going to have to sit through Goldberg vs. Luger II and Sid vs. Steiner for the title at the biggest show of the year. Oh and the Insiders getting the titles back because they need them so badly. The booking is crippling anything else they could do and it’s only going to get worse.

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Thunder – November 29, 2000: They Quit

Thunder
Date: November 29, 2000
Location: Metro Center, Moline, Illinois
Attendance: 3,800
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden

We’re now in the post Stevie Ray era so I’m really not sure how well we’re going to be able to survive. It’s just such a sad world anymore and they might have to just close the promotion to let us heal. We’re rapidly approaching Starrcade and the main event is going to be Sid vs. Scott Steiner because we live in a random and chaotic universe. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Nitro’s highlights, which included Sid Vicious in a turtleneck.

Here’s Ric Flair to get things going. Ric praises the idea of Steiner defending the title against Sid at Starrcade but tonight it’s Buff Bagwell getting a shot. Based off what exactly? Anyway he brings out Sid, who says he defended that champion night after night (yes defended the champion). Sid has been watching from home and has seen Booker T. and General Rection take over in his place. Steiner is in the wrong place at the wrong time, which Sid somehow tries to tie into the Wright Brothers.

Shane Douglas wants the US Title so he can move on to the World Title. Torrie tells Pamela to not hate her because she’s beautiful. Pamela isn’t sure what to think of this and I’m much more on Torrie’s side here. Pamela is the hot blonde but Torrie is just on another level.

Lance Storm/Elix Skipper vs. Jung Dragons

Storm still has taped up ribs and seems to blame Duggan for the loss to Yang on Monday. The Dragons and Madden take turns oogling Leia Meow as Skipper rolls Yang up for two to start. Yang climbs the corner into an armdrag before it’s off to Kaz for an enziguri. The Canadians regroup on the floor so the Dragons do some impressions to entertain the crowd.

Back in and Storm kicks Kaz in the back of the head to take over, allowing Skipper to walk the ropes into a hurricanrana. Kaz flips out of a powerbomb though and kicks a seated Elix in the head for the tag off to Yang. House is cleaned until a low blow gives Skipper a near fall as everything breaks down. Storm crotches Kaz on top so Skipper can hit a good looking butterfly superplex. The women have the required catfight as the Cat comes out to take care of Duggan. A top rope backsplash/legdrop is enough to put Skipper away.

Rating: C. Fun match but the announcers still act like the idea of the Dragons beating anyone other than Noble and Karagias or 3 Count is unthinkable. The match was fine for a high flying fight though which is something often overlooked about Team Canada: as much as people remember Storm’s promos and catchphrases, both he and Skipper could go very well in the ring.

Storm yells at Duggan.

General Rection would love to fight Shane and AWALL wants Bam Bam Bigelow again.

Lex Luger vs. Norman Smiley

They bring Smiley back for this? Madden: “Luger has the body fat of a paperclip.” Tony: “A paperclip has body fat?” Norman gets in a dropkick to frustrate Luger early on, followed by a cross body for two. They head outside with Luger sending him into the barricade and gets two off a belly to back suplex. Norman comes back with the spinning slam and the spanking dance, only to have Luger forearm him low. The forearm sets up the torture rack to end Norman.

Rating: D. Again: they brought Norman back for this? That’s what Smiley gets for being talented and popular I guess, because somehow doing the opposite got Luger a two match feud with Goldberg of all people. As usual, WCW has no idea which people to push (not to say that Smiley should get a big push of course) as Luger has no business being there and it’s been obvious since the day he returned.

Post match Luger keeps Norman in the hold until Goldberg makes the save.

Bigelow calls AWALL a freak and wants to hurt him in a tables match.

Crowbar is getting a massage when one of the Nitro Girls delivers him a present: a golden pipe wrench. Ok then.

Reno and Marie are with Pamela, who asks if they’re dating. Apparently they’re actually brother and sister, which makes Pamela realize that Reno and Vito are BROTHERS. Somehow this was never mentioned before, though it shouldn’t be that hard for either of them to figure out.

Kronik seems to have a new client.

Jeff Jarrett has the Harris Brothers to fight the Filthy Animals.

Hardcore Title: Crowbar vs. David Flair

Crowbar is defending and has that wrench in his belt. The regular belt, not the title belt. They fight over a trashcan to start and David actually gets the better of it early on. Therefore, it’s time to hit the champ in the face with a mop. Crowbar comes back with the wrench but the mop is right there for the save because they’re the exact same thing.

It’s time for a paint tray with Crowbar beating David out to the floor and putting a chair on top of him for a Vader Bomb. Flair comes back with a chair shot of his own but the Figure Four is broken up by with a cookie sheet. Just picture Dusty and Ric doing that and see if you don’t chuckle or cry at least a little bit. Crowbar pops up and hits him with the wrench for the pin to retain.

Rating: D-. I’m still waiting on a point to this division other than giving the overly talented Crowbar something worthless to do. David is still insane and therefore not very interesting as you can only see that sort of thing so often, especially when the running joke seems to be that he’s not very good but tries so hard. Naturally since it’s professional wrestling, that sort of effort is to be mocked instead of rewarded or nurtured.

Post match Stacy Keibler and the trainer check on David, who wants to know about the wrench.

US Title: General Rection vs. Shane Douglas

Shane, with Torrie, is challenging and they get in their standard pre-match stuff about how much better they are than all of us. Douglas is smart enough to go after the knee to start and gets in a few shots to slow the champion down early. We’re already in the figure four so I can’t imagine this is going to go long. Rection gets the rope and starts his comeback, only to have Torrie come in and jump on his back. Somehow not noticing that it’s a smaller, lighter person or the long blonde hair, Rection drives her back first into the buckle. That’s too much around here and the match is stopped, likely setting up a rematch at Starrcade.

Ever the gentleman, Lieutenant Loco tries to get her out of the ring so the fight can continue but basically everyone glares him off.

Post break, Loco yells at Rection for not following up and a split is teased.

Filthy Animals vs. Jeff Jarrett/Harris Twins

Great, the Band is back together. It’s a huge brawl to start with Konnan staying on the floor instead of helping his smaller partners. We settle down to Konnan coming in to work on Ron’s wrist as we hear about Torrie getting crushed again. Rey bulldogs Ron down as Tygress goes on about player hating.

Don comes in to help on a double spinebuster and a swinging Boss Man Slam gets two. Naturally this warrants a talk about paying the Harris Twins in sandwiches because WCW. Konnan isn’t paying attention to a tag attempt from Rey so Jarrett knocks him off the apron. The referee tells the guys that they have three minutes as Kidman comes in to clean house. Everything breaks down and Jarrett guitars Kidman for the pin.

Rating: D+. That sounds like the mating call of a rubber match at Starrcade, likely with the guitar legal for a change. I really don’t think I need to make fun of this one all that much when the story revolves around the Harris Brothers being willing to fight for sandwiches. Even David Flair is more respected than this. Oh and somehow the referee doesn’t notice the pieces of the guitar around the ring.

Buff is ready for his title shot tonight.

Daffney returns to say she and Ozzy broke up so now she wants to be with Crowbar. He’s not so keen on the idea though and turns her down, even though it seems to make him very sad.

This week’s sitdown interview is with Stevie Ray because WCW actually thinks people care. We get right to the point as Stevie says no one has a brother in the business like he does. As usual I think I get the point but since Stevie is only a commentator, he isn’t the best at getting his point across. Stevie made his debut here back in 1993 and is one of the most successful tag team wrestlers of all time. Now he thinks he might start a drag racing team (which I believe he actually did) and thanks the fans for their support over the years.

Glacier is still coming back.

Sgt. AWALL vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Tables match and it’s Bigelow pounding away to start. A powerbomb is countered with a backdrop to send Bigelow outside but instead of trying to put him through the table, it’s time to brawl around ringside. Back in and a German suplex through the table……doesn’t count because both of them went through at the same time. Well of course they did. They head outside again so Mike Awesome can sneak in and blast Bigelow with a chair, allowing AWALL to put him through the table.

Rating: F. Are they even ripping ECW off at this point? I mean, last year with Sandman and Raven was one thing but this is even less interesting than that was. I’m also not sure why none of these guys ever bother going after the Hardcore Title. It’s not like what they’re doing here is really all that much better than getting a belt out of it.

Awesome wants Bam Bam Bigelow at Starrcade. Somehow that’s a big deal for Awesome.

WCW World Title: Buff Bagwell vs. Scott Steiner

Steiner is defending of course. Steiner gives Buff a chance to leave before the beating begins but Buff dropkicks him to the floor and sends him into the barricade. Back in and Buff’s right hands don’t get him anywhere as Scott ties him in the Tree of Woe for some choking. The elbow into the pushups gives us a signature spot as Madden does a bad Billy Graham impression.

The belly to belly gets two and it’s time to grab the referee by the shirt. Buff misses a dropkick to stop a comeback bid because he’s Buff Bagwell and this is a big match. A DDT puts Steiner down but Scott pops back up with ease. Cue Sid on the screen for a distraction though, allowing the Blockbuster to hit for two. Buff has to catch a diving Midajah though and a quick Recliner retains the title.

Rating: D. I actually like Buff as the one off challenger here even though he had no chance of winning because he’s Buff Bagwell and never actually won a big singles match in WCW. The Sid thing was a waste of time but then again so is Sid in the main event in the first place. Bad match but perfect for a Thunder main event.

Sid comes out to jaw with Steiner to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. They’ve just given up. You can clearly see that there’s no real effort being put into the writing (though the wrestling is tolerable at times) or storytelling and that’s caused them to hit a very hard wall. The younger guys are putting in an effort as they so often do but there’s only so much you can do when it’s Lex Luger, Scott Steiner with the horrible chinlock, Sid and the Insiders as some of the top names in the promotion.

This place really is just about the old guys and the worst part is that’s how they’re being presented: the older, cagey generation who is still around and hogging all the spots. There’s almost nothing here worth watching and it’s going to make the next few months much more sad than hard to sit through.

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Mayhem 2000: A New Way To Suck

Mayhem 2000
Date: November 26, 2000
Location: Wisconsin Center Arena, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Attendance: 3,800
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Stevie Ray, Mark Madden

We’re running out of pay per views here with just four more after this one. Things are about as bad as they’ve been since Russo left, including a rather uninteresting main event of Booker T. defending his World Title against Scott Steiner (again) in a match that really isn’t the biggest secret. Let’s get to it.

We open with Booker arriving and being mobbed by the fans that are always allowed backstage near where the wrestlers enter the building.

Steiner arrived and destroyed a table for no logical reason.

The opening video focuses on Booker vs. Steiner (with the latter in a straitjacket), Goldberg vs. Luger and Nash/Page vs. the Perfect Event.

Earlier today, CEO Ric Flair promised us great wrestling tonight. That lying scumbag. Madden: “I don’t trust him.”

Cruiserweight Title: Kwee Wee vs. Mike Sanders

Sanders is defending after Kwee Wee won a six man match to earn the title shot. The entrance really shows how tiny the title belt is. That thing looks like a cheap toy. Sanders slaps him in the face before the match and eats a Thesz press. Tony: “He’s going to fight Angry Alan instead of Kwee Wee here!” Stevie: “He’s going to fight WHO???” Tony: “That’s his alter ego! Don’t you pay attention?”

Sanders gets knocked to the floor in frustration so here are the Thrillers for a cheap shot. Stevie doesn’t understand how the referee didn’t care that Kwee Wee was laid out when Sanders was in front of the referee’s eyes. We get the double beal into a powerslam from Sanders (sweet spot) so here’s Meng (accompanied by Paisley in a Meng afro wig) to go after the Thrillers, who can’t beat him down.

Ric Flair brings out security to pull Meng off as the match continues to be completely ignored while this goes on. We actually pay attention again with Sanders dropping a dancing knee for two. Off to a chinlock as Madden says Paisley is out here because of the size of her chest. Kwee Wee springboards into a sunset flip for two as we hit the lame comeback. Madden: “This never happens to Paul Tagliabue.”

Kwee Wee actually tries a sunset bomb over the top tot he floor but gets hurricanranaed (kind of) for a counter. Paisley slaps Mike in the face so he rips off her afro, earning himself a handspring elbow and not a DQ for no logical reason. The referee sends her out, allowing Mike to get in the 3.0 (Orton’s backbreaker) to retain.

Rating: D. WAY too much going on but what else are you supposed to do when you have a match that no one is interested in and two guys who aren’t the best workers in the first place? Sanders is a fine talker but he’s killed that title worse than anyone I’ve seen in a very long time. Just bad in general here and not a great way to fire up a crowd.

Flair says no wrestlers are allowed at ringside unless you’re in the match, valets excluded of course.

The Boogie Knights try to buy Kronik AGAIN but Disco doesn’t have enough money. They’re in the ballpark though so Kronik will work for half of a fifteen minute match, which Disco thinks is eight minutes. Apparently it was going to be a handicap match but since Konnan isn’t here and Disco is hurt, we’re getting Rey Mysterio/Kidman vs. Alex/Kronik. So was it originally Konnan/Mysterio/Kidman vs. the Knights? That’s what they booked?

Evan Karagias sounds like a moron but it turns out that he used to date Jamie Noble’s sister.

Crowbar arrives with two women and sings some Bee Gees. Someone has sent him flowers and promises to be watching. No word on why the Hardcore Title was in his dressing room before he arrived.

Noble and Karagias vs. 3 Count vs. Jung Dragons

3 Count is left in the ring while the other four brawl in the aisle before Noble and Karagias are stuck on the floor while the Dragons fight with 3 Count. It’s time for a dance off because of course it is and Madden isn’t sure if he should cheer for Evan or not. We settle down to Evan chopping Kaz before it’s off to Jamie for a wristlock on Helms. Moore comes in for a spinwheel kick to help Shane’s German suplex.

Jamie pops back up with a powerbomb though and Yang tags himself in for a quick double team on Shannon. It settles back down to Kaz beating on Moore before we trade some rollups which the referee misses. I’m not sure what the point of that was but it was long enough to be a segment of the match. Kaz kicks Shane in the head and brings in Yang to clean house.

Shannon plants Yang with a sleeper drop for two as everything breaks down. Noble tombstones Yang but the Nightmare on Helm Street gets two on Jamie with Evan making the save. Now it’s time for the dives with Leia diving on five guys at once. Jamie pulls out a ladder because of course he does but it gets left outside as Noble crotches Yang on the top.

Evan ducks a dive which hits Shannon instead, setting up a double two count. Well it was called a double two, even though only Kaz kicked out and the referee should have counted a fall on Shannon. Thankfully Stevie is right there to rip on the referee for being so horrible, as he’s been doing all match. Back up and 3 Count grabs a Samoan drop/swinging neckbreaker combo on Yang for the pin.

Rating: B. There’s your match of the night and it wasn’t even anything all that great. WCW clearly wants these guys to be their Edge and Christian/Dudleyz/Hardyz but instead of elevating them, these six guys are stuck in an eternal hamster wheel of having the best match on the show but going nowhere. At least this was fun though and at least it didn’t open the show, even though it probably would have been a better option.

The announcer suggest that 3 Count deserves a Tag Team Title shot (they do but of course that would never happen) but instead we cut away to Bam Bam Bigelow beating down Mike Awesome.

Alex Wright insults Pamela and we recap the Boogie Knights buying Kronik for seven and a half minutes. In other words, the story hasn’t changed in the last fifteen minutes.

Jimmy Hart insists that he has a bad leg. Okerlund: “That cast looks about as real as Major Gunns’……” Jimmy: “It’s real!” Somehow this is a rematch from earlier in the spring because of reasons.

Reno says he’s got the Hardcore Title on his own tonight.

Mancow vs. Jimmy Hart

Mancow seems to have some fans here tonight and he’s allowed to have his sidekicks around tonight because this isn’t a sanctioned match. We get a quick recap (Hart insulted Mancow on his radio show) and Mancow says Jimmy is the Al Gore to his George W. Bush. Of course the injury is a fraud and Jimmy hits him in the back with a crutch. Cue 3 Count to make a save for no logical reason, allowing Mancow to take off the cast and hit Jimmy for the pin. I wonder who didn’t make the show for the sake of this mess.

Mike Awesome is taken away by medics.

The Misfits want to help General Rection tonight but he says Flair has banned them. They do however get new shirts as a consolation gift. Flair comes in and asks to talk to Sgt. AWALL.

Bam Bam Bigelow and Lance Storm are talking about something.

The Filthy Animals aren’t worried about Kronik.

Hardcore Title: Crowbar vs. Big Vito vs. Reno

Crowbar is defending. Vito and Reno slug it out to start and here’s Crowbar (apparently with an injured abdominal muscle) to join them a few moments later. Vito throws the champ through the ropes and onto Reno before busting out the kendo stick. Of course Vito has his own bag of Italian flag themed weapons to beat on both guys as this is already going nowhere.

Everyone beats on everyone as Madden thinks you should just bring a gun in. Stevie: “The way the referees are working around here that might work.” Reno and Crowbar start double teaming Vito before Reno baseball bats him in the back. Tony wonders what goes through your mind when you swing a bat at a man’s back. All three fight backstage with Reno powerslamming Vito through a table. Cue Reno’s sister Marie to break up a chair shot, allowing Crowbar to hit Reno with a chair of his own to retain.

Rating: F. Either get rid of the division or let Crowbar and Smiley do goofy stuff with it because this serious stuff (including Reno vs. Vito) is just so freaking boring. It’s just brawling with nothing interesting going on and an attempt at a story which goes nowhere either. Get rid of the thing or try something interesting because this is the worst stuff they’re doing with actual wrestlers.

Buff Bagwell arrives. For some reason this is a big deal.

Kevin Nash and Diamond Dallas Page actually explain what SOL means.

Gene is with the Cat and Miss Jones, the latter of whom he calls delicious. Cat says he’ll leave the country for thirty days if he loses tonight. Gene: “Ms. Jones, I could rock your world sweetheart!”

Rey Mysterio/Kidman vs. Alex Wright/Kronik

Tony confirms that yes, this was going to be three Filthy Animals vs. the Boogie Knights. Remember that Kronik is only out here for seven minutes and thirty seconds. Tygress sits in on commentary to drive me crazier than Mancow ever could. Disco is at ringside to violate Flair’s rules.

Kidman headlocks Adams to start and is immediately launched across the ring. An armdrag puts Adams down as Disco is at the announcers’ table plugging WOW Magazine where he’s listed as WCW’s Wrestler of the Month. Kidman grabs a sleeper as Tony says there’s a WCW Magazine to plug instead. The full nelson slam plants Kidman and Alex tags himself in for two. It’s off to Rey vs. Clark with Mysterio being tossed into the corner for a beating from the orange giant.

A bulldog drops Clark and sets up a springboard legdrop for two. The announcers debate what Tygress calls Rey (Papi) as he’s caught in a sitout powerbomb. Again Alex tags himself in for two before kicking Rey in the face. It’s time for a tag but Kronik leaves, 6:11 into the match. The fact that they have a stopwatch makes this even dumber. Kidman and Rey beat Alex down as the announcers debate Tygress’ “stuff”. The Nutcracker Sweet puts Wright away.

Rating: D. Who was this supposed to benefit? The Knights look like they can’t win a match on their own and the Animals can only claim a victory in a handicap match. Kronik comes off looking the best here as Clark beat Rey and Kidman on Thunder by himself and now the two of them leaving changes the course of the match. They’re the ones who come out looking smart, save for that whole not being able to tell time thing.

Mike Sanders has a plan for the Tag Team Title match.

Scott Steiner says he’s out of his mind and that means he’s at his best.

The Cat vs. Shane Douglas

Shane gets kicked to the floor to start and goes after Ms. Jones, who kicks him in the head to save herself. Cat goes after Madden to continue their ridiculous feud, allowing Shane to slam Cat back inside to take over. We hit the choking and the neck crank for a bit before Cat comes back with his weak variety of strikes.

There’s the Feliner but Cat is dizzy for no apparent reason, meaning Ms. Jones has to shove him into the cover for two. The women go at it on the floor before heading inside for more brawling. In the melee, Shane finds a chain to blast Cat for two. Shane stops paying attention so Jones pulls out a briefcase containing the loaded red shoe, which knocks Shane silly for the pin.

Rating: F+. This is on a LONG list of matches you could cut to improve the show. Who in the world wanted to see this James Brown nonsense again with the Cat cheating more than Shane cheated to win? Cat is a funny guy at times but this is another feud that wasn’t interesting in the first place and then had a bad match on top of that.

All of Jeff Jarrett’s guitars have been destroyed and Bagwell may have been behind it.

General Rection (or Hugh as his teammates call him) says this is the final match with Lance Storm and whoever wins tonight wins the war. It’s not over until the Misfits say it’s over.

I kid you not: we get a GLACIER promo. Tony: “Oh no not again.” Madden: “What are we thinking doing that crap again? Then again we keep Disco around.”

Bam Bam Bigelow comes out and says he beats Mike Awesome by forfeit. Not quite though as here’s Ric Flair (Stevie doesn’t recognize the music but thinks Ric is going to fight) to say there’s a replacement. Ric: “We’ve got 10,000 people here to see you wrestle.” Shut up Ric. You’re drunk. At least we have a face boss for a bit though and it’s a nice idea.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Sgt. AWALL

Madden rants about how Bigelow should have won by forfeit but Stevie says this table can only take so much. It’s a brawl to start as the announcers debate why AWALL has a table out here when it’s not a hardcore match. Tony’s eventual answer is that “it’s his thing.” AWALL gets two off a middle rope clothesline but Bigelow spins out of a belly to back and lands on top to take over. The Greetings From Asbury Park is countered into a forearm to the chest and it’s table time. The chokeslam is countered as well and the Greetings put AWALL away, even though his head didn’t come close to the mat.

Rating: D-. Another match that could have been cut and added nothing. I like the idea of delivering on what was promised here but good night they could have done anything else but this and no one would have noticed. At least they kept this short, but again how many people are there that could have played AWALL’s part and gotten a win out of it? Bad match too, as you would expect here.

Post match Bigelow collapses and it’s treated as a big serious moment.

After that, Bagwell laughs off Jarrett not having a guitar to use tonight.

Bigelow is stretchered out as this is still treated as a big deal.

We recap Lance Storm vs. General Rection which is mainly about Major Gunns changing sides and becoming Canadian by her own free will. Unfortunately people stopped caring months ago but the feud is FINALLY wrapping up here.

US Title: Lance Storm vs. General Rection

Rection is challenging and Storm has badly taped up ribs. Oh and remember when Storm and Bigelow were talking earlier in the night? It was a swerve so Bigelow can pop off the stretcher and jump Rection, which TOTALLY required the stretcher and Owen Hart voices and couldn’t have just been done in a backstage segment.

Storm starts fast as you would expect him to and goes after the knee which is wrapped around the post. Rection kicks him away but has to get to the ropes to avoid a Mapleleaf. Storm gets crotched against the post and Rection powerslams him but Gunns breaks up the moonsault. And never mind as Rection elbows Storm off the top and “hits” the moonsault to get the title back.

Rating: D. Yeah after all that build and storyline, this wasn’t even six and a half minutes. Cat vs. Douglas gets eight minutes and the US Title match, which actually had a long story to get us here, can’t even get six and a half. Another nothing match and another time that the midcard champion’s name is a sex pun.

Sanders tells Doug Dillinger to send security home for the night. Dillinger doesn’t seem impressed.

The announcers promise that the main events are still to come.

Ad for Starrcade in three weeks. Can you imagine Wrestlemania getting anything less than five weeks?

Jeff Jarrett vs. Buff Bagwell

Oddly enough Jeff Jarrett drops to the midcard as soon as Russo is gone. Jarrett doesn’t have a guitar here and it really is a strange sight. Buff shoves him away to start and it’s already time to pose. A swinging neckbreaker and some right hands set up a hiptoss to send Jeff outside but he gets in a low blow to get a breather.

Madden thinks it was just a twisted nipple. Jarrett gets in a few chair shots and again, disqualifications aren’t a thing in WCW 2000. Back in and Jeff stomps away as this is rapidly dying before our eyes. We hit the sleeper because that’s a Jeff Jarrett spot, as is him missing a running crotch attack and hitting the ropes. The Blockbuster misses though so Buff has to hit a tornado DDT for two instead.

The ref gets backdropped to the floor (of course) and here’s David Flair to DDT Jarrett onto the chair in retaliation from Monday. Since David sucks as a professional wrestler though, Jeff kicks out at two. Buff’s reverse layout DDT (think Christian) gets the same but Jeff has another guitar hidden under the ring. A big shot to the shoulder is enough to put Bagwell down for the pin.

Rating: D+. That’s almost out of pity, which really isn’t the best sign for a match. This was Jarrett being uninteresting as only he can and Bagwell being the same guy he’s been for years now. I’m still not sure why these two are fighting in the first place and I doubt WCW has much of an idea either.

Again we immediately cut away to recap Nash/Page vs. the Thrillers. This isn’t a very complicated one: the Thrillers turned their back on Coach Nash and beat him down several times, which meant Nash needed help. For reasons that aren’t clear, this meant Page.

Tag Team Titles: Diamond Dallas Page/Kevin Nash vs. Perfect Event

Perfect Event is defending and Sanders comes out for commentary. As you might expect, the Thrillers come out as the security guards for the match to get around Flair’s ruling. Or they could just be Disco Inferno. The fans want Hall but of course that’s not an option right now. Nash and Palumbo get things going though I never heard an opening bell.

After a quick break on the floor, Palumbo comes back in for some hard (open hand) punches, earning himself entry into the People Kevin Nash Has Done The Same Stuff To In The Corner Club. Snake Eyes drops Palumbo and Nash gives Stasiak a left hand (that’s a new one) to put him on the floor. The Thrillers try to come in and are dispatched just as quickly but here are Flair and the real security to get rid of them.

Apparently Sanders has a manager’s license (which says “Official Manager”) which allows him to stick around. Madden: “You’re like Jim Cornette but people still remember who you are.” We settle down to Page clotheslining Stasiak and Shawn being knocked back and forth between the challengers’ fists. A quick DDT gets two for Stasiak, followed by a double slingshot suplex for two from Palumbo.

Page avoids a charge in the corner and clotheslines Palumbo down but still can’t make the hot tag. A sunset flip causes Stasiak’s trunks to come down but Page is still kept in the wrong part of town. Palumbo’s top rope shoulder gets two on Page as this is already the second best match on the show, at least partially because of the time it’s getting. You can’t tell any kind of a story in five minutes while this one has already broken ten. Palumbo trips Page in the corner and a double wishbone keeps him in trouble.

Page powers out of a front facelock and makes the tag but of course the referee doesn’t see it. That’s one of those ideas that is always going to work. We hit the sleeper on Page for the belly to back counter and the tag to Nash which really wasn’t as hot as it should have been. House is quickly cleaned and Nash Jackknifes Stasiak for two with Sanders pulling the referee out. That earns Mike a Diamond Cutter as Nash covers Stasiak again for the titles.

Rating: C-. It’s not so much that the match was good (it was ok at best) but this was pretty easily the second best match on the card so far. Nash and Page may be old and no longer draws but they’re capable of having a watchable match. Unfortunately this is probably about it for the Thrillers as they gave the veterans their best shot and got beat in the middle of the ring. What’s left for them to really do? Again: they’re the original Nexus.

Lex Luger is ready for Goldberg because it’s the only thing he hasn’t done in wrestling.

Quick recap of Luger vs. Goldberg, which is all about adding a big win to Goldberg’s second Streak, even though Flair basically said the Streak means nothing anymore.

Lex Luger vs. Goldberg

At least it’s Luger again and not the Total Package while everyone called him Luger anyway. Madden tries to explain that only Russo can change the Streak thing, which makes sense in theory, but it stops making sense when you have Flair saying it can be overridden at basically a moment’s notice. Goldberg works on the arm to start and pops up after a belly to back suplex.

Lex slowly stomps Goldberg down in the corner but he’s right on his feet again for some knees to Luger’s chest. Luger’s running forearm puts Goldberg down and a big clothesline sends him over the top. Back in and Goldberg hits a quick powerslam before pounding away on the mat. The spear hits Luger and the referee but Goldberg Jackhammers Lex anyway, meaning a second referee comes in to count the pin.

Rating: D-. It says a lot when Goldberg is clearly the better worker in the match but Luger was horrible here. He wasn’t doing anything beyond forearms and knees to the back and that’s just not enough in 2000. Bad match here and in this case it’s because of that stupid Streak thing as Goldberg should be getting ready for the World Title instead of squashing an over the hill goon like Luger.

The cage is lowered while Goldberg’s music is still playing.

Quick recap of Booker T. vs. Scott Steiner, which is a rematch from Halloween Havoc where Steiner got disqualified for being too brutal.

WCW World Title: Scott Steiner vs. Booker T.

Booker is defending and this is a straitjacket Caged Heat (Cell) match because a regular cage match just wouldn’t be enough. In other words there’s a straitjacket in the corner of the cage and you can use it to tie your opponent up. Steiner attacks him at the door but Michael Buffer is professional enough to complete the introductions while the beating is on.

Booker fights him off and takes off the belt, only to get pounded down in the corner. A clothesline puts Booker on the floor and it’s time for the elbow into the pushups. The spinning belly to belly gets two but Booker gets in a few kicks for a breather. That comeback is quickly stopped by a clothesline, followed by a superplex for two. A bearhug gets Steiner as far as a bearhug is going to get him as Booker fights back and gets in the missile dropkick. It’s time to get the straitjacket but Booker doesn’t exactly tie Steiner up that well.

Instead he goes outside and gets a chair to blast Steiner in the head twice in a row. Steiner, whose arms were never tied, rips the jacket apart, rendering that aspect of the match completely worthless. There’s the Recliner but Booker counters with an electric chair into a stun gun. Booker gets in a quick Book End for two but Steiner is right back to his feet. The ax kick connects but Steiner gets in a chair shot, followed by a Bubba Bomb of all things. Steiner puts on the Recliner for the knockout and the title as Stevie is devastated.

Rating: D+. Well that happened. They made no secret of the fact that Steiner was winning the title here and it was probably long overdue. The match was watchable enough but the straitjacket thing really didn’t need to be there. It also didn’t help that Steiner actually set a new benchmark for worst Recliner ever as Booker was just on his knees with Steiner’s hands in front of his throat. That looked horrible and there’s no other way to describe it.

Steiner destroys Booker’s knee to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. This isn’t as hard to sit through as the Russo shows but they’re far less interesting. The problem here is so much of this isn’t worth airing on a pay per view. You could probably cut off half the matches and air this as roughly an hour and a half show to greater results. Let’s see:

Hart vs. Mancow

Hardcore Title

Wright/Kronik vs. Filthy Animals

Cat vs. Douglas

Bigelow vs. AWALL

Jarrett vs. Bagwell

That’s half the card and how much of it would have been missed if it wasn’t around? WCW is going in circles at this point and it’s really getting tiresome. We’re three weeks away from Starrcade and I can’t even begin to imagine what we’re going to have to sit through there. Unfortunately it’s probably going to be Mayhem II, despite the show really not being good in the first place.

You can’t overlook that either: this show really isn’t all that good. You had a fun three way tag match that meant nothing and a decent Tag Team Title change which isn’t likely to mean anything either as those titles change hands so fast. Other than that the matches ranged anywhere from horrible to worthless, though at least this time there was nothing stupid enough to make me need to go on a long winded rant to calm my nerves.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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