Wrestlemania XXIX
Date: April 7, 2013
Location: MetLife Stadium, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 80,676
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

With those matches out of the way, the only name left is the Undertaker, who will be facing CM Punk in a match that might have been better had it been for the title. This time it’s personal though, as Paul Bearer had recently passed away, leaving Punk to mock his memory and steal the urn one last time. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Intercontinental Title: Wade Barrett vs. The Miz

Barrett is defending and Miz is now a good guy who uses the Figure Four. Miz gets sent to the apron to start but slides in for a sunset flip for two. A hard kick to the ribs drops Miz but he’s still able to get his boot up to stop Wade’s running boot. The Reality Check (backbreaker/neckbreaker combo) gets two on the champ, followed by Winds of Change (spinning Boss Man Slam) from Barrett for the same. Barrett’s Bull Hammer (hard elbow to the head) is countered with the Figure Four, sending Wade into the ropes. Not that it matters as Miz sweeps the leg and puts the hold on again for the tap out and the title at 4:05.

Rating: D+. Really quick and nothing match here to fire the crowd up before the real show comes on. Barrett and Miz were both in tailspins at this point and the title was in an even worse place with meaningless title changes like this one. To give you an idea of what this meant, Barrett would get the title back the next night on Raw.

The opening video is narrated by New Jersey Governor Chris Christie, who talks about the devastation of Hurricane Sandy, which leveled huge portions of New Jersey. In the face of all that adversity though, New Jersey stood tall and is still alive today. Everywhere from New York to New Jersey, the people are unbreakable and unstoppable.

The New Jersey National Guard waves American flags.

We get the standard awesome Wrestlemania opening video, again focusing on the Wrestlemania Moment. The Streak actually gets the primary focus here with the other two main events going after. A great line here: “The storied past is only rivaled by the promise of a glorious future.”

We’re back in the company’s home area, hence the theme song called Coming Home.

The set is one of their most detailed ever with the Brooklyn Bridge and Empire State Building over the entrance and the Statue of Liberty over the canopy above the ring.

Sheamus/Randy Orton/Big Show vs. Shield

Shield (Dean Ambrose/Roman Reigns/Seth Rollins. I’ll spare you a description of each.) comes through the crowd as is their custom. Show hasn’t been considered the most trustworthy partner so the question is whether or not the team will implode. Sheamus and Reigns get things going with Roman taking over in the corner and stopping a charge with an elbow.

It’s off to Orton to slam Rollins’ head into the mat and then stomp on his face. Some right hands in the corner and a slingshot suplex get two on Rollins and it’s back to Sheamus. Notice the lack of tagging in Big Show. Ambrose comes in and gets powered down by Sheamus as well, only to have Show tag himself in for a series of rapid fire (well as rapid fire as Show can reach) chops in the corner.

Shield starts going with what brought them to the dance with the fast tags, setting up the top rope knee to Show’s head for two. Dean has lost his shirt as he comes in to stomp Show down, followed by some knees to the head to give Rollins two. Reigns puts on a chinlock (he’s the only member of the team who could make that work) until Show easily throws him down and makes the tag off to Sheamus.

That means Rollins loses his shirt as well for the ten forearms to the chest. Not to be outdone, Ambrose replaces Sheamus and takes a string of forearms of his own. Reigns breaks up the top rope battering ram though as Orton and Show have been taken down off camera. Orton gets triple teamed and it’s a triple stomp on Sheamus back inside.

Show comes back in with a spear to break up the TripleBomb. Sheamus crawls over to tag Show but Orton tags himself in instead to clean house, including catching a springboarding Rollins in the RKO. Reigns comes in with a spear for the pin at 10:34 with Big Show just watching the pin go down.

Rating: C+. Nice opener here as Shield looked good and are clearly the future. Show turning on his partners doesn’t do anything for me as it happens at least twice a year. Orton and Sheamus were great choices to put in on the team as they can take a loss with no damage and are just good enough that you could see them pulling it off. Shield would have far better matches but that wasn’t the point here.

Post match Show knocks his partners out.

Music video on Rock vs. Cena. Haven’t we already paid for the match at this point? We really don’t need to have it hyped again. The theme here is Rock’s legacy vs. Cena’s redemption.

Ryback vs. Mark Henry

Ryback has been in a free fall since losing his undefeated streak and needs a win to get his momentum back. Henry hasn’t meant much in awhile but is still strong enough to be a threat to anyone. They slug it out to start with Henry as the strong crowd favorite despite being the heel. New York fans are smart you see. Henry runs him over and grabs a powerslam for one.

A “Sexual Chocolate” chant begins and Henry clotheslines him out to the floor before bringing Ryback inside again for some shots to the back. The bearhug doesn’t last long as Henry throws him outside again, only to put the bearhug on again. Just in case Ryback didn’t learn his lesson the first time. Ryback makes his quick comeback with the Meathook clothesline but Henry grabs the rope to break up the Shellshock. The weight makes Ryback collapse and Henry falls on him for the pin at 8:03.

Rating: D. What the heck was that? They’ve set Ryback up as needing a win and they have him lose here? The only answer would be a losing streak to set up a heel turn, because WWE thinks the best way to get someone over as a heel is to have them lose all their matches first. Really weird decision here but WWE had a lot of those.

Post match Ryback hits the Shell Shock. Henry would lose a World Title shot the next night and Ryback would indeed turn heel, leading a series of pay per view title shots. Why they didn’t have Ryback win here, then have Henry answer an open challenge for the title the next night and then let Ryback have his title series as the bigger threat. Instead they did everything backwards because they do a lot of stupid things.

The announcers play with their new toys with JBL making sure to beat up Rey Mysterio.

The WWE is partnering with the Special Olympics.

Some Special Olympians are here with Stephanie McMahon and Chris Christie.

Tag Team Titles: HELL NO vs. Dolph Ziggler/Big E. Langston

HELL NO (Daniel Bryan/Kane) is defending. Langston is Ziggler’s new bodyguard and an awesome powerhouse. The bell rings and Ziggler kisses AJ (Now with him. As Lawler put it, AJ has been on more manhunts than the FBI.) and walks into a kick to the head from Bryan for two in a nice callback. Ziggler bails to the floor and eats a suicide dive followed by the YES kicks. That’s finally enough to send Ziggler over for the tag and Bryan does the same for the power vs. power match.

Langston throws Kane into the corner and powers out of a chokeslam before running Kane over ala Vader. It’s off to Ziggler who misses a splash in the corner and overshoots the Fameasser. Everything breaks down as Langston breaks up a cover, leaving Ziggler to hit the Zig Zag on Kane for two. AJ throws in the Money in the Bank briefcase, only to have Dolph walk into a chokeslam. Bryan adds the top rope headbutt to retain the titles at 6:17.

Rating: C-. Just a step above a Raw match here which is becoming a problem on this show. Things picked up a lot near the end but what are you going to get out of a six minute match? Bryan and Kane were becoming something special and Ziggler would win the World Heavyweight Championship the next night.

WWE works with Make-A-Wish.

Fandango vs. Chris Jericho

Fandango is a dancer (formerly known as Johnny Curtis) making his in ring debut here. It had been teased a few times before but he had declined due to someone pronouncing his name wrong (seriously). Jericho was chosen because he kept messing the name up (“Fan-Danny Devito? Fan-B-I-N-G-O-and Bingo was his name-o!”). Fandango comes out with a bunch of dancers before going to ringside with his main dance partner.

Jericho takes him down to start and pounds away with a very early Codebreaker putting Fandango outside for a big dive. Fandango is staggered but finally comes back with an enziguri to take over. JBL is really not pleased with Fandango posing so much because JBL is far too uncultured to understand the power of dance. A chinlock just seems to re-energize Jericho as he comes back with an enziguri of his own, only to be sent into the post.

Now we get Fandango’s real control as he drops his top rope legdrop for two. Yeah they really just had his finisher get two in his debut. Does that mean it’s still his finisher? Jericho breaks up a second legdrop attempt but the Walls are countered into a small package for the pin at 9:18.

Rating: C. That’s one of the biggest upsets in Wrestlemania history and it really shouldn’t be that big of a surprise given that Jericho was only around to put people over at this point. The extra time helped a bit but everyone knew that a dancing gimmick was only going to go so far, though it did lead to the INSANE rise of Fandangoing (a dance done to the tune of Fandango’s music) that was the hottest thing in the company for about a week, starting the next night.

Clip of the pre-show match.

Another Rock vs. Cena video with fans quoting Rock’s catchphrases. This is the kind of stuff that really needed to be cut for the sake of more match time.

Here’s a montage of Wrestlemania moments set to music from the Rocky movies, leading to P. Diddy coming out for the musical medley. At least it’s shorter than Kid Rock.

We recap Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger. Del Rio has turned face and won the World Heavyweight Title back in January. Swagger then adopted a new gimmick as the disciple of Zeb Colter (formerly known as Uncle Zebekiah about eighteen years ago), a man who accused ever non-white person of sneaking across the border and being here illegally. The match is a huge culture clash with Swagger wanting to win the title and get rid of Del Rio while Del Rio is standing up for what he believes America is all about. Swagger won the Elimination Chamber to earn this shot.

World Heavyweight Title: Jack Swagger vs. Alberto Del Rio

Swagger is challenging and doesn’t even get an entrance. Did I mention that he had been arrested for DUI and marijuana possession about six weeks before this match? Before the match, Colter rips on New York for being a bunch of people who can’t speak English. Swagger recently broke Ricardo Rodriguez’s ankle but Ricardo limps out here. I had hoped they would get Ricardo deported and then have him make his big return here instead but it’s not that big of a deal.

Swagger bails to the floor to start so Alberto drops him with two boots through the ropes. Back in and a Colter distraction lets Swagger run him over and put on a very quickly broken chinlock. A Vader bomb gets a close two on the champ and Jack drives in some weak shoulders to the ribs. Alberto fires off some clotheslines and even stomps on Colter’s hand, only to have Swagger slam him down to break up the armbreaker attempt.

Swagger finally gets to the point by taking out the leg to set up the Patriot (ankle) Lock. Del Rio easily kicks him away and pounds in forearms to the back, followed by a Backstabber for two. Neither guy can get their submission so Jack settles for a layout powerbomb for two more.

The Patriot Lock goes on but Del Rio takes him down and counters into the armbreaker, only to have Swagger kick the arms away and grab the ankle again. Del Rio gets to the ropes and comes back with the corner enziguri (thankfully limping into it) but has to save Ricardo from Colter. Swagger gets in a few cheap shots but Del Rio grabs the armbreaker back inside for the tap out at 10:30.

Rating: B-. Again the time hurt this but the submission trading with all the counters was really fun stuff. They would have an I Quit match the next month which sounds good on paper, until you realize that Del Rio just beat him by submission here. Del Rio was a good face but for some reason they turned him right back in June. On the other hand, Swagger was dead in the water the second he got arrested which made the match more academic. There were rumors that he was going to win until the arrest, which really does show how much one mistake can screw you up.

WWE supports the National Guard, in case you haven’t been told how awesome the company is in the last half hour.

We recap CM Punk vs. Undertaker, which is mostly about the urn and Paul Bearer’s legacy. Undertaker had been paying tribute to him but Punk interrupted to say that Bearer was lucky enough to not see Undertaker lose his Wrestlemania perfection. Punk spent weeks disrespecting Bearer’s memory with manager Paul Heyman even dressing up like Bearer as a distraction so Punk could beat Undertaker down. Undertaker swore that even if the Streak ended, Punk wouldn’t live to tell about it.

CM Punk vs. Undertaker

Living Colour plays Punk to the ring and Heyman still has the urn. No druids this year but the stage is so close to the fans that you can see hands reaching through the shadows and smoke to try and touch Undertaker. Punk spends the entrance tossing the urn in the air like a ball. Undertaker stalks him into the corner and gets slapped in the face as Punk is trying to win any way he can, including by DQ.

The chokeslam is broken up by a kick to the head so Undertaker takes him to the floor and throws Punk over the timekeeper’s barricade. It’s time to load up the announcers’ table but Undertaker throws him back inside. Old School is broken up as well and Punk actually does his own Old School for a new idea.

Punk starts working on the arm to set up for the Anaconda Vice before throwing him outside for a top rope ax handle. Back in and we hit the chinlock as Heyman talks trash from the floor. Punk makes the eternal mistake of trying the same move twice and crotches himself going for Old School. Heyman breaks up the Taker Dive and Punk gets two off a springboard clothesline.

The Macho Elbow gets the same and Heyman holds up the urn. A quick chokeslam gets two for Undertaker but the big boot is blocked by a leg lariat. They head outside with Punk escaping a Last Ride and kicking Undertaker onto the table. The Macho Elbow doesn’t break the table which had to feel horrible on Punk’s hip and knee. Undertaker beats the count at nine and a half and Punk is shocked. He’s shocked enough that Undertaker grabs Hell’s Gate, only to have Punk roll over into the Anaconda Vice.

In the spot of the match, Undertaker does the situp and stares into Punk’s eyes as the hold is still on. Punk’s confidence is shattered as he looks completely terrified with his best move getting him nowhere. A chokeslam is countered into a bad GTS but Undertaker shrugs it off (to be fair it really didn’t connect) and grabs a Tombstone for two on a hot near fall. They slug it out and there goes the referee.

Punk tries his running knee in the corner but gets countered into the Last Ride. Before he’s dropped, Heyman throws in the urn for a shot to the head and a very close two (done much better with HHH and the sledgehammer at Wrestlemania XVII). The GTS is countered into the Tombstone which is countered into the GTS which is countered into the Tombstone to make it 21-0 at 22:08.

Rating: B+. I liked this better on a second viewing as when I watched live, I never bought the Streak as being in jeopardy. They tried to make the Vice a big deal but at the end of the day, Undertaker does not tap out. Period. Why should I buy this particular submission as having a chance? The urn to the head was a good near fall though and had me closer to thinking it was over than anything in the HHH match two years earlier. Very good match but it never hit the level of the HHH and Shawn editions.

Undertaker poses a lot and retrieves the urn one more time.

Ad for the new Mick Foley DVD.

Here’s a video on Cena wanting his redemption tonight after losing a year ago. This makes over ten minutes spent on these things.

Sports commentator Michelle Beadle is here.

We recap HHH vs. Lesnar II. They fought at Summerslam 2012 with Lesnar making HHH tap out. HHH teased retiring as a result (again taking the focus off Lesnar as the last shot of the show was HHH standing in the ring alone) and after no one bought it, Lesnar attacked Vince and Shawn to set up the rematch here. To make it even more intense, it’s no holds barred with HHH’s career on the line. (which was announced with the same intensity as last year’s Cell match). Just in case you had any doubt that HHH was winning here you see.

At the end of the day though, everyone knew this was all about HHH getting his redemption over Lesnar because Lesnar is the latest monster trying to stop HHH’s precious legacy, even though Lesnar is anything but just another monster. Unfortunately that’s how Lesnar was billed and it made this feud even less interesting. The first match was fine, but this was the least interesting rematch in a long time.

HHH vs. Brock Lesnar

Shawn and Heyman are here as seconds and remember it’s no holds barred. HHH sends him to the floor to start and whips Brock hard into the barricade. You know, the same Brock who destroyed Cena when they fought about a year ago? Well HHH is beating him up a minute into the match. The fans are silent but it’s in awe of the awesomeness I’m sure.

HHH knocks a chair out of Lesnar’s hands but Heyman is smart enough to grab the chair before HHH can get it. A whip into the steps has no effect on Brock as he belly to bellys HHH on the floor (now that’s more like it). HHH gets suplexed through the announcers’ table and Brock is in Beast Mode. Brock throws him onto the pieces of the table and a single glare at Shawn sends him SPRINTING away. Yeah because a Hall of Famer and one of the best ever just isn’t good enough to stand up to Brock the way HHH did.

Back in and a series of suplexes gets a series of two counts. Brock goes after Shawn on the floor but the distraction lets HHH get in a clothesline to put Lesnar in the timekeeper’s area. That goes nowhere though as Brock Germans him again and elbows Shawn in the face. You don’t mess with HHH’s life partner though and he plants Brock with a spinebuster. The Pedigree is countered into an F5 but Shawn comes in for a superkick, only to take the F5 instead.

HHH grabs a quick Pedigree for two but the sledgehammer shot is countered with an F5 for another two. They go outside again with HHH going into the steps, which are then sent inside for more fun. Brock hits him with the steps for two and tells HHH to retire, igniting HHH’s comeback. Cole: “A little flame in the game!” The Kimura (Brock’s arm lock) has HHH in trouble but he breaks it up as the fans want to see a broken arm.

Brock gets it on for the fourth time in a row with his legs wrapped around HHH’s waist, only to get powered into a spinebuster for the break. HHH is MANLY you see. A low blow keeps Brock down and HHH wraps his arm around the post. He crushes Brock’s arm with a chair for good measure and there’s a Kimura from HHH. So he’s a submission guy too. Heyman tries to come in for the save but Shawn superkicks him down. See, Heyman isn’t some big monster that would scare Shawn.

Thankfully Brock doesn’t tap as he lifts HHH up and slams him onto the steps. HHH grabs the hold again so Brock counters it the same way. It worked so well that they do it AGAIN, but since HHH is so smart he counters into a DDT onto the steps. The sledgehammer to the head and a Pedigree onto the steps ends Brock at 23:58.

Rating: B-. This was HHH’s big thank you for putting Lesnar over last year, because a win over HHH means SO much at this point. Let’s recap: HHH is able to beat Brock in a slugout, knows how to do UFC submissions, isn’t a coward like Shawn (that Hall of Fame World Champion), can survive suplexes and F5’s and isn’t hurt by things like Kimuras.

HHH looked like a god here and it was so ridiculous for a long majority of the match. The fans’ silence was so telling as they just did not want to see HHH get his big moment, no matter how much HHH demanded that he get it. Oh and they had ANOTHER match the next month too, stretching their feud to a year. At least HHH was nice enough to put Lesnar over there, because he couldn’t do it here at the show people remember most.

Hall of Fame video, with a STACKED lineup.

Here’s the Class of 2013: Mick Foley, Booker T. (probably the lowest level wrestler in the class), Trish Stratus, Bob Backlund, Donald Trump (booed here but he’s been at five Wrestlemanias now) and the headliner: Bruno Sammartino (so long overdue it’s unreal). If there’s ever been a better class, I’ve yet to see it.

Wrestlemania XXX is in New Orleans.

The new attendance record is announced.

No recap of the main event but I think you get the idea by now.

WWE World Title: John Cena vs. The Rock

Rock is defending. Cena is booed out of the building even worse than he was last year, which I didn’t think was possible. After the big match intros, Cena runs him over with a shoulder to start. Rock nails one of his own and it’s a standoff. They circle each other for a bit as the fans are restless, leaving Cole to explain Rock’s history.

Rock takes over with some right hands and a kick to the face but Cena grabs a belly to belly. A chinlock keeps the match slow until Rock reverses into a sleeper. Cena counters with another suplex and stomps down as JBL actually says Rock and Cena compete in movies. A release fisherman’s suplex gets two on the champ and good grief do something interesting already.

Rock comes back with right hands before ducking a shoulder. The STF is broken up but now some weak shoulders have Rock in trouble. Well they’re certainly doing something now. A much better Sharpshooter has Cena in trouble but he rolls away and hits the ProtoBomb. The Shuffle misses so Cena settles for the STF, only to have Rock reverse into a rollup for two.

Cena catapults him into the corner and now the Shuffle connects. The AA is broken up and Rock plants him with the spinebuster, only to have the People’s Elbow countered into another STF. Rock rolls onto his side and separates Cena’s hands for the break in a good power display. Back up and a Rock Bottom out of nowhere gets two. There’s an AA for two with almost no one buying the near fall.

Rock avoids the top rope Fameasser and scores with the spinebuster into the Elbow for two more. Just like last year, Rock goes up for a cross body but gets caught in the AA, only to slip out and hit the Rock Bottom. Instead of covering though he tries the Shuffle, allowing Cena to hit another AA for two. Cena wins a slugout and Rock Bottoms Rock (BIG reaction for that) but the kickout stuns him all over again.

Just like last year (again), Cena tries the Elbow but is ready for Rock, only to take too much time setting up the AA and getting countered into the Rock Bottom for two. They counter each others’ finishers about five times in a row (with little energy on any of them) until Rock plants him with a DDT. Another Rock Bottom is countered into another AA to give Cena the title back at 24:00.

Rating: B-. While it’s still entertaining, there was almost no emotion in this. It felt like both guys were just going through the motions to get to the obvious ending and that’s not good. As we’ve seen over the years, there are ways to have an entertaining match with an obvious ending but that’s not what happened here. Instead this was a bunch of finishing moves over and over after about ten minutes of nothing to start. It’s still a good enough match, but they really needed more intensity here. At least look like you’re giving it everything you have even if you really aren’t.

One last thing of note: at some point, Rock ripped his abdominal muscle and suffered a hernia. Reports vary about when it happened (ranging from in the opening to the first AA to the final AA) but it’s a major reason why Rock hasn’t had a match since. This is WAY too dangerous for him to be doing when he’s needed on movie sets and it will probably keep him out of the ring for good, save for maybe one more farewell match.

They shake hands post match and say something to each other than the cameras can’t pick up. Cena leaves Rock in the ring to pose until Rock comes up to the stage to raise Cena’s hand and end the show.

Overall Rating: C. In a word, this show was just there. There’s good stuff on it but nothing feels like it matters. Instead we have a bunch of good to decent matches with the crowd (and remember a good chunk of it is a New York crowd) not caring. The last two matches are especially bad about this as they were rematches that people didn’t want to see. The HHH vs. Lesnar rematch was even worse about this as there was no need to have a rematch other than to make HHH look good. Rock vs. Cena wasn’t as bad about that but it also wasn’t as entertaining of a match.

Undertaker vs. Punk is definitely the best match of the show due to the good story behind it and the execution helps even more. I still didn’t believe that Punk was a real threat to the streak but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t entertaining. Punk got in a lot more offense than I was expecting and had some near falls to make it good. There was no way Undertaker was going out in his tribute to Bearer though.

The rest of the card is where the show falls apart. There’s some watchable stuff but so much of it feels like it belongs on Raw. None of the first five matches break eleven minutes and I really didn’t have much interest in seeing Chris Jericho lose to a newcomer, even if it was one of the biggest upsets ever. The first half of this show had the problem of not feeling like a Wrestlemania, which is one of the worst things that can happen. The second half is a huge improvement, but nowhere near enough to make this required viewing.

Ratings Comparison

The Miz vs. Wade Barrett

Original: D+

2014 Redo: C

2015 Redo: D+

Shield vs. Randy Orton/Sheamus/Big Show

Original: B-

2014 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: C+

Ryback vs. Mark Henry

Original: D

2014 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D

Dolph Ziggler/Big E. Langston vs. HELL NO

Original: C

2014 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: C-

Fandango vs. Chris Jericho

Original: D

2014 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C

Jack Swagger vs. Alberto Del Rio

Original: C+

2014 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: B-

Undertaker vs. CM Punk

Original: B

2014 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B+

HHH vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: B+

2014 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B-

John Cena vs. The Rock

Original: C+

2014 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: B-

2014 Redo: B

2015 Redo: C

There’s good stuff in there but it’s swimming with an anchor.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/04/07/wrestlemania-xxix-and-so-it-ends/

And the 2014 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/04/05/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxix-redo-twice-in-a-lifetime/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Wrestlemania XXVIII
Date: April 1, 2012
Location: Sun Life Stadium, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 78,363
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

As big as HHH vs. Undertaker is, everything pales in comparison to Rock vs. Cena. This was the biggest match since Rock vs. Austin’s heyday and the money it brought in more than validated an entire year spent setting everything up. There’s no way the match isn’t going to be great and everyone was ready to see it. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Primo/Epico vs. Tyson Kidd/Justin Gabriel

Primo and Epico (Carlito and Primo’s cousin) are defending and this is one fall to a finish. Primo, Jey and Kidd start things off and you have to tag your partner. Kidd sends Primo to the floor and jumps into a rollup for two. The champs start stomping Tyson gets caught in a DDT for two more. Primo loads up a superplex on Jey but Kidd springboards up to make it a Tower of Doom in a cool spot.

Jimmy and Epico get hot tags and everything breaks down. Jey throws Gabriel up for a Samoan drop but Justin kicks out. Epico gets backdropped over the top and out onto Primo, setting up a dive from Jey. Gabriel moonsaults out onto all three of them, leaving only Jimmy on his feet. Jimmy throws Gabriel back in for a cover, only to have Epico come in for a Backstabber to Jimmy for the pin at 5:11.

Rating: C. Fun tag match here and much better than most of the pre-show matches in recent years. Epico and Primo certainly weren’t great champions by any stretch but there were far worse options out there. This wasn’t meant to revitalize the division or anything but it was very suitable for a quick match to fire the crowd up.

Lillian Garcia sings America the Beautiful. The show is outside again and the stadium looks amazing.

The opening video shows the paths that Cena and Rock took to get here in a really nice concept. We also see the montage of Wrestlemania moments before focusing on HHH vs. Undertaker as the last of a generation. Just like two years earlier, they’re making no secret of the fact that this is a two match card.

World Heavyweight Championship: Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus

Notice that the Raw and Smackdown names have been dropped as the Brand Split officially ended in August 2011. Sheamus is challenging after winning the 2012 Royal Rumble and choosing to fight Bryan, who won the title by cashing in a Money in the Bank contract at Tables, Ladders and Chairs 2011. Bryan also has his girlfriend AJ Lee with him. The bell rings, Bryan kisses AJ, and it’s a Brogue Kick to give us a new champion at 18 seconds. That fall would haunt Bryan for over a year and indirectly lead to his rise up the card which we’ll get to later.

Team Johnny (as in John Laurinitis, one of McMahon’s longtime yes men) is ready for the ten man tag later tonight. Miz tries to captain the team but they’re not interested in listening. David Otunga (a wrestling lawyer) introduces Johnny in his white suit. Johnny talks about what a big moment this is going to be, just like Austin not submitting and Hogan slamming Andre. There’s no punchline or anything here and it’s just building up the match later. It’s Team Johnny vs. Team Teddy with the winning GM controlling both shows.

Kane vs. Randy Orton

Kane is upset that he shook Randy’s hand last year after a street fight and needs to become a monster again. Cole explained that as Kane made his entrance and it was simple, to the point, and told you everything you need to know. Why is that so hard the rest of the year? The fans chant for Bryan as the sun is starting to set.

Orton pounds him down to start and loads up the elevated DDT (which Cole calls a bulldog), only to get draped over the top rope. A big boot to the face sets up a chinlock as the match slows down a bit. Kane’s side slam gets two more and we hear a weak BORING chant. Orton gets taken down in a vertical suplex and Kane puts on his third chinlock of the match. They get back up and Orton hooks his backbreaker, followed by the elevated DDT (AGAIN called a bulldog by Cole).

It’s Kane up first though and he tries the top rope clothesline, only to dive into the dropkick. The Punt is countered into a chokeslam for two (Do they really need to have finishers kicked out of so often? This is a midcard match, not a main event.) so Kane heads up top. Orton breaks it up and tries the superplex, only to get countered into a super chokeslam to give Kane the pin at 10:57.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad and it’s nice to see Orton lose a match after getting dominated and not just nail a quick RKO for the pin. You can tell this is designed to set up a bunch of rematches, which is part of the problem with Wrestlemania: it should be the big ending to a feud, not the start of one. I liked this more the first time around but the chinlocks really hold it back on another viewing.

Santino Marella talks to a cast member from Deadliest Catch and Mick Foley is there eating crabs while talking like a pirate. Mr. Socko and the Cobra make cameo appearances and destroy the crabs until Ron Simmons comes in for his catchphrase.

Intercontinental Title: Cody Rhodes vs. Big Show

Show is challenging but more importantly he’s in search of his Wrestlemania moment. Cody had made fun of him for weeks over being a joke at Wrestlemania because in this universe, Wrestlemania XVI where Big Show was in the main event doesn’t exist. Yeah he lost quick but how many main events has Cody been in? Cole makes it even worse by saying Show has won some tag matches but was never involved in the pinfall victory. I guess that quick match last year doesn’t count either.

Cody gets Show to chase him to start but dives into Show’s arms, meaning it’s time for the beating to begin. There are the loud chops in the corner and Show adds a Stinkface to make up for some of the humiliation. Cody comes back with a series of dropkicks, including one to the leg for a smart move.

Show gets his leg cranked as Cole says he isn’t as big when he’s on the mat. As usual, this is inaccurate. Actually Show is the same size but he can’t use it to his advantage. I know it’s stupid but that always gets on my nerves. Show fights up and the Disaster Kick doesn’t even knock him down. Cody tries another but gets “speared” (more like a shoulder block which went very low), followed by the WMD (KO Punch) for the pin and the title at 5:20.

Rating: D. So Big Show has the title now, but I guess the whole Wrestlemania moment is the real prize. It’s not like the title had meant anything in years anyway so that makes as much sense as anything else. It makes more sense than saying being in the main event of a Wrestlemania doesn’t count as a major moment at least.

Video on what it means to be a WWE Diva, which seems to translate to wearing very little clothing and dancing a lot.

We recap the Divas tag match. Kelly Kelly had been a guest on Maria Menunos’ (a good looking TV host) Extra when Eve Torres and Beth Phoenix came in and said they should be interviewed. The solution was a tag match of course.

Maria Menunos/Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres

Beth is Divas Champion (and has wings on her head for no apparent reason) while Maria has cracked ribs and stress fractures in her feet. A quick rollup gets two for Kelly but her cartwheel into an elbow hits feet to the legs. Eve’s moonsault is broken up and Maria comes in for a double Stinkface. Off to a bodyscissors on Maria until Beth comes in for a bearhug from the side.

Eve tries another dancing moonsault but gets kicked out to the floor, allowing for the tag off to Kelly. The screaming headscissors puts Beth down and a top rope seated senton gets two. Beth’s Glam Slam is countered into a bulldog (actually a bulldog this time) and the tag is made to the still injured Maria. Kelly saves her from getting slammed and Maria rolls Beth up for the pin at 6:50.

Rating: D+. I know Kelly is supposed to be this big deal but her theme song is still about hollering in a club to a hot beat. Then you have the Divas Champion lose to a celebrity, who to be fair was clearly trying. The match could have been worse but the division was just dying at this point and this was great proof. Watchable match, horrible ending. You really can’t have Eve get pinned here? Really? Also: only Maria would be involved with the next Wrestlemania.

Shawn Michaels says this next match will be the end of an era. It’s ironic that he gets to decide which era that will be.

The attendance record is announced.

Jim Ross, now with a goatee, comes out to do commentary.

There’s no recap for the Cell match (if you were watching the show you probably knew the story already) but as I said it’s the final chapter in the story between these three men. HHH wanted one more shot at the Streak (though the way he talked you would think he already broke it) and Undertaker agreed if it was inside the Cell. Shawn is guest referee to add some more drama.

Undertaker vs. HHH

Inside Hell in a Cell with Shawn as guest referee. Shawn takes a quick lap around the stage before coming to the ring. HHH comes out through a miniature set designed like a war helmet and shoulder pads. Undertaker’s hair now now shaved into a mohawk with the first reveal coming here, much to the crowd’s shock. The Cell is lowered to The Memory Remains by Metallica, allowing JR to talk about how the Cell is morally corrupt.

Undertaker slugs him down to start (with carcinogenic right hands according to JR) and HHH can’t hang in a fist fight. They head outside instead with Undertaker backdropping him onto the floor. The announcers talk about how this is the end of an era and we’ll never return to it. Undertaker sends him into the cage as Cole’s latest stat is HHH winning every match in which Shawn is a guest referee. So he’s what: 2 or 3-0?

Back in and the facebuster has no effect on Undertaker and it’s Old School putting HHH down again. The steps off HHH’s head surprisingly don’t draw blood. The apron legdrop keeps HHH in trouble before we get to the real violence. HHH finally gets in a DDT for a breather but the Pedigree onto the steps is quickly broken up. The spinebuster onto the steps works a lot better and Undertaker is in trouble.

HHH walks right into Hell’s Gate from the steps so he lifts Undertaker up (JR: “Sinful strength by HHH!”) into a powerbomb onto the mat for the save. The steps are sent to the floor and it’s time for the chair shots to Undertaker’s back. Shawn tries to pull HHH off but JR accurately says that there are no rules (unfortunately with no strange word choices). Michaels tries to talk Undertaker into quitting (out of sympathy, not cheating) but Undertaker demands that it not be stopped.

That earns him a chair to the ribs and the back for a pretty slow two count. HHH goes to get more weapons and tells Shawn to end it before he does. That means sledgehammer time but Undertaker says keep it going. There’s a sledgehammer shot to the face for two (we’re getting close to that ridiculous point). Shawn breaks up another one to the back of the head to avoid being a murder witness and thinks about calling the match to save Undertaker.

You don’t threaten the Undertaker though so he chokes Shawn out to break it up. That earns him another sledgehammer to the head but there’s no referee. Undertaker is still able to kick HHH low, despite probably having about 18 concussions at once. The Hell’s Gate has HHH in trouble and here’s another referee to take Shawn’s place. A chokeslam gets two so Undertaker chokeslams the new referee (barely getting him above shoulder high).

Shawn gets back up and superkicks Undertaker into the Pedigree for maybe the hottest near fall of all time, sending Shawn nearly into tears in the corner. I totally and completely bought that it was over on that cover. HHH gets the sledgehammer and throws an intervening Shawn to the floor…..and Undertaker sits up with that look in his eye. You can take your Brock Lesnar, your old school Vader, your Mankind and your Mr. McMahon at his craziest. For me, ticked off Undertaker is the scariest thing in wrestling.

The big boot and Snake Eyes set up a Tombstone for a very close two and Undertaker’s adrenaline comes to a sudden stop. They slug it out from their knees and then their feet until a quick Pedigree gets two. Shawn is still on the verge of tears. Undertaker sits up again but falls when he tries to get to his feet. HHH gets the sledgehammer again but Undertaker steps on it before unloading on HHH with a chair.

The chair is bent over HHH’s back and now Shawn has to try to stop Undertaker. All those shots are only good for two and Shawn begs HHH to stop. HHH tries to get the sledgehammer back up but Undertaker easily blocks a swing. Barely able to stand in the corner, HHH fires off a crotch chop as Shawn turns his head. A sledgehammer to the head means it’s time for the straps to come down and the Tombstone finally ends HHH at 30:54.

Rating: A+. What a ride. Those are the first words to come to my head after seeing this again because that went from one end of the roller coaster to another with every kind of emotion you could find in the middle. This is one of the best stories ever told in a match and a perfect way to conclude a four year saga between these three men. I’m glad the Streak didn’t end here, but that superkick into the Pedigree had me ready to believe that it was over. This is an absolute masterpiece and the definition of wrestling as art. There’s nothing left for these three to do and they left it all in the ring. See this if you haven’t before.

Shawn has to pull Undertaker up as HHH is still unconscious. They eventually help HHH out and get him up the ramp where they all hug to truly end this in a show of respect. That’s what the entire story was based on, even if they went to war for years. It was never a war based on hatred and it’s very good that they showcased that at the end.

We get the Hall of Fame video from last night with the Four Horsemen being inducted as a team so Flair could be put in twice. This wound up biting them though as Flair was officially still under contract to TNA so WWE had to send Christian to Slammiversary 2012 as compensation (while Christian was still Intercontinental Champion).

Here’s the Class of 2012: Mil Mascaras, Yokozuna (represented by his children), Ron Simmons, the Four Horsemen (Flair, Arn Anderson, JJ Dillon, Tully Blanchard and Barry Windham. I believe it’s just this incarnation and not the group as a whole), Mike Tyson and Edge.

Heath Slater wants to sing a duet with Florida (“That’s Flo Rida.”) but Rida isn’t interested in any sort of partnership. Slater gets beaten up.

Team Teddy vs. Team Johnny

Teddy: Santino Marella, R-Truth, Kofi Kingston, Zack Ryder, Great Khali, Booker T.

Johnny: David Otunga, Mark Henry, Dolph Ziggler, Drew McIntyre, Jack Swagger, The Miz

The winner’s team gets to run both shows. Johnny has Vickie Guerrero and Brie Bella, Teddy has Hornswoggle, Eve Torres, Brie Bella and Aksana (Teddy’s would-be girlfriend). Ryder is fresh off becoming a grassroots hero who won the US Title, only to lose it all (presumably because he isn’t what WWE wanted as a star, as brilliant an idea as that is). Johnny is in a white suit and red tie, making him look like a thin Colonel Sanders. All of the wrestlers (including Captains Otunga and Marella (US Champion)) are in red or blue shirts.

Kofi and Ziggler start (makes sense as they’ve fought literally about thirty times on TV alone over the years) with Kofi grabbing a headlock and bringing in Truth for a double hiptoss. Ziggler comes back with a dropkick and it’s off to Drew as Cole and Lawler bicker over who would be the better GM.

Khali comes in for the big chops before handing it off to Booker (a last minute addition to the team) for two off a side slam. Booker gets in trouble though and it’s time for the face in peril (along with Vickie screaming). Mark comes in and throw Booker into the corner before Miz comes in, much to Cole’s delight. Booker fights out of a chinlock as the discussion turns to Vickie’s looks.

The World’s Strongest Slam drops Booker and everything breaks down. A double flapjack drops Khali but Kofi, Ryder and Truth hit triple flip dives to take out most of Team Johnny. Aksana and Vickie brawl which gets the Bellas into it. The hot tag brings in Santino to clean house, including his saluting top rope headbutt.

There’s the Cobra to Miz (Cole: “Oh my God, oh my God.”) but Ziggler breaks it up at two. Ryder comes in and takes down Miz and Ziggler, including a Rough Ryder (leg lariat) to Dolph. Eve gets in the ring for no apparent reason other than to distract Ryder, allowing Miz to hit the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin on Zack at 10:38.

Rating: D+. Big mess here but that triple dive was really cool looking. This was another step towards Ryder’s complete burial after he ran from Kane, was destroyed by Kane, lost his US Title and lost Eve (the woman of his dreams) a few months ago. It was depressing how bad things got for him and he never recovered. As you probably guessed, this was your annual get everyone on the show match.

Eve kicks Ryder low to make sure you get the idea: don’t cheer for people WWE doesn’t pick.

Alex Rodriguez and Torrie Wilson are here.

Wrestlemania week video.

CM Punk is ready to defend his WWE World Title but Johnny comes up to say the title can change hands on a DQ.

We recap Jericho vs. Punk. Jericho returned again and accused Punk of ripping him off when Punk called himself the best in the world. Punk eliminated him from the Elimination Chamber by knocking Jericho out due to injury without pinning him. Jericho then won a battle royal to earn this shot and started accusing Punk’s family of being a bunch of alcoholics and drug addicts. That’s too much for Punk and now he’s out for blood.

WWE World Title: CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho

Punk is defending if that wasn’t clear and he can lose the title on a DQ, just in case they didn’t hammer the idea in well enough at Wrestlemania XXV. The champ takes it to the mat to start before taking Jericho down again with a knee to the ribs. Jericho gets sent into the corner where he shouts “HOW’S YOUR FATHER” to send Punk over the edge again. Punk beats him down again but the threat of the top rope elbow sends Jericho to the floor.

That’s fine with Punk as he dives onto Jericho, who then asks about Punk’s sister. Punk grabs a chair but opts to kick Jericho in the ribs instead. Just like three years ago, these pauses are killing the flow of the match. A quick dropkick gives Jericho a breather and he suplexes Punk over the top and out to the floor for a big crash. You don’t often see that work. Jericho starts working on the back to set up the Walls with a kick to the spine and a backsplash for two. A double arm crank keeps Punk in trouble until he dropkicks Jericho into the corner.

The running knee in the corner sets up the bulldog but Jericho slams him down instead. Punk has to counter the Walls and gets two off the high kick to the head. The Macho Elbow hits Jericho’s knees though and a Codebreaker puts Punk on the floor. Back in and a GTS out of nowhere gets two (no way a title match ends on the first finisher). Jericho drapes him ribs first over the top rope and the Lionsault gets two. Cole: “Not often you see somebody kick out of the Lionsault.” I don’t remember the last time it pinned someone.

The Walls have Punk in trouble but he makes the ropes as you would expect. A knee to the head staggers Jericho but Punk springboards into another Codebreaker for another two. Punk kicks him down again and tries the GTS (Punk: “BEST IN THE WORLD!”), only to be countered into the Liontamer (kneeling Boston crab) and then the Walls. Punk counters into a small package and then the Anaconda Vice. Jericho counters THAT with knees to the head but can’t hook the Walls again, allowing Punk to hook the Vice (and duck his head this time) for the tap out at 22:20.

Rating: B+. This got so much better once they got away from the stupid DQ stuff (which would be remedied at the next pay per view with an awesome street fight). I really don’t get the thinking behind the DQ idea. I know it’s the evil GM screwing with Punk but it cripples whatever the match could get going. Either let them do the violent stuff that fits the story or just have it be an awesome match like they’re clearly capable of having. This half and half stuff almost never works and this only succeeded because of how good both guys are.

Wrestlemania XXIX is in New Jersey.

Here’s the still mostly new Funkasaurus Brodus Clay to tell us to call our mamas. Brodus calls his own mama and finds out that she’s here, complete with the bridge club. Cue mama and said bridge club (all a bunch of older women (clearly in makeup) and matching dresses) for a massive dance number. This got twelve times the length that Sheamus vs. Bryan had.

Video on G.I. Joe 2, which wasn’t released for over a year due to re-shoots.

After all that, we recap John Cena vs. the Rock. This has been built up for over a year now and both guys have spent so much time heavily insulting each other that it actually is epic, as described by a bunch of legends in the video. Several years back, Cena had been on a radio show where he talked about Rock saying he loved WWE and then leaving. Cena on the other hand was here every single day because this is what he loved more than anything.

This turned into a back and forth war until Rock finally returned over a year ago. This is the match that has been set up by both guys trading huge bombs on the mic with Rock saying Cena wasn’t serious enough and Cena calling Rock out for using wrestling to become an actor. They flat out did not like each other and made that very clear, setting up this match as the biggest in a generation, which it certainly was. The tagline for the match and the show: Once in a Lifetime.

Since we haven’t dragged it out enough, here are Machine Gun Kelly and Skylar Grey to perform the show’s theme song and define the word underdog.

John Cena vs. The Rock

Cena is booed out of Miami the second his music hits. And wait again because here’s Flo Rida to perform two songs and eat up even more time. Of note: he has a bunch of backup dancers, who I’m assuming are the bridge club after a costume change. After that eats up WAY too much time, Rock’s ovation is thunderous. Ignore him having to walk through the posing dancers to look out at the people. They talk trash after the big match intros and we finally get the opening bell, nearly twenty minutes after the video package began.

We get the big lockup and Cena shoves him away. Rock does the same as we’re firmly in Hogan vs. Warrior territory so far. Some quick armdrags and a majistral cradle get two for Rock, sending Cena into the corner with a stunned look on his face. Rock can’t get a Sharpshooter and Cena bails to the floor for a breather.

Back in and Cena takes Rock’s head off with a clothesline for one and we hit a bearhug on the mat. That goes nowhere so they head to the floor with Rock being dropped ribs first over the barricade. Cena stays on them with a belly to belly and now it’s off to a bearhug. Rock fights back with right hands and the spinebuster but Cena grabs the leg for the STF to break up the People’s Elbow. He can’t get the hold on so it’s a ProtoBomb instead, followed by the Shuffle.

Back up and it’s a double clothesline to give us another breather. Another slugout goes to Rock but he tries his own You Can’t See Me and walks into the AA for two. The Rock Bottom gets the same but Cena comes back with a side slam. The top rope Fameasser gets another two and both guys are spent. Something like a spear (it was supposed to be a spinebuster) sets up the Sharpshooter (with Rock pulling back with his hands instead of his arm), only to have Cena quickly make it to the ropes.

Rock sends him hard into the steps to keep Cena in trouble but he grabs the STF (with almost no torque). The hold stays on WAY too long and Rock starts to fade, even drawing an arm check. Rock finally makes the ropes after about two minutes and grabs a Samoan drop to get a breather.

The AA is countered into a spinebuster (Rock might have said “Yabba dabba” on the way down) and the People’s Elbow for a really close near fall. A catapult of all things sends Rock into the buckle (as opposed to a Buick sending him into it), only to have Rock break up a superplex. Rock goes nuts with a high cross body but Cena counters into an AA for two more. With nothing else working, Cena tries his own People’s Elbow but charges into the Rock Bottom for the pin at 30:54.

Rating: A. Just because it’s not quite as good as the Cell. That was the main event of Wrestlemania. What else can you ask for from these two, especially after all this build and the Rock having one match in eight years? This was almost all about the atmosphere coming in and then they had a great match on top of it. It’s one of the best main events ever and certainly one of the biggest, which is exactly what it needed to be.

So did the right guy win? I really don’t think so the more I look at it. Everything that Cena had said over the year was true: win or lose, Rock was going back to Hollywood to star in another blockbuster so why should he win here? It really doesn’t help Cena either as he got beat by a guy who hasn’t wrestled in eight years, though at the same time I don’t want to imagine how bad the reaction would have been if Rock had lost in his hometown. I would have gone with Cena, though I think I can understand their reasons behind going with Rock. Maybe.

Now for the second iconic image of the show: Rock poses on the ropes and Cena sits on the ramp, totally lost.

Overall Rating: B+. This is almost all about the two main events which ate up nearly half the show when you consider buildup and fallout. Those two matches were both home runs and that’s all you need to make this a good show. Jericho vs. Punk is good but not great….and that’s about the extent of the positives on the show. Everything else is just ok at best but again, nearly two hours of great is more than you get on several months of shows most of the time, which easily makes this a very good show.

Ratings Comparison

Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Kane vs. Randy Orton

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: C-

Cody Rhodes vs. Big Show

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D

Kelly Kelly/Maria Menunos vs. Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres

Original: C+

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D+

HHH vs. Undertaker

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2015 Redo: A+

Team Johnny vs. Team Teddy

Original: C

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D+

Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk

Original: A

2013 Redo: A

2015 Redo: B+

The Rock vs. John Cena

Original: B+

2013 Redo: A+

2015 Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A

2015 Redo: B+

The top matches on this card are as good as WWE has done in a long time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/04/01/wrestlemania-xxviii-one-of-the-best-shows-of-all-time/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/04/06/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxviii-this-show-got-me-excited-all-over-again/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Wrestlemania XXVI
Date: March 28, 2010
Location: University of Phoenix Stadium, Glendale, Arizona
Attendance: 72,219
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker

In addition to the two main events, there’s a third big match that people never thought would actually happen. Back on January 4, 2010, Bret Hart returned to the company for the first time in over twelve years. After burying the hatchet with Shawn Michaels, there was only one score left to settle: Vince McMahon. Therefore, it’s Bret vs. Vince, naturally in a no holds barred match. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Mark Henry, Shad Gaspard, JTG, Goldust, Yoshi Tatsu, Santino Marella, Primo, Kung Fu Naki, Slam Master J., Jimmy Wang Yang, Chris Masters, Vladimir Kozlov, Great Khali, Finlay, William Regal, Luke Gallows, Carlito, Tyler Reks, Zack Ryder, Lance Archer, Mike Knox, Caylen Croft, Trent Barretta, Tyson Kidd, David Hart-Smith, Chavo Guerrero

Gaspard and JTG are Cryme Tyme, Tatsu is a talented Japanese wrestler who didn’t go anywhere, Slam Master J. is Jesse in a bad rap gimmick, Kozlov is a Russian mixed martial arts fighter, Gallows is a big power guy, Reks is a surfer, Archer is another big power guy, Croft and Barretta are a team called the Dudebusters and Hart-Smith is Kidd’s partner in the Hart Dynasty. The NXT rookies (from back when NXT was a competition) are watching from the stage.

Primo and J. are sent out in the first thirty seconds but the ring is still really full. Henry puts out the Dudebusters and Chavo, only to get dumped by Khali. As you might expect, a bunch of people get together to put Khali out as well. Cryme Tyme gets together to put out Gallows but Shad eliminates JTG. Things settle down for a change but there are still too many people in there.

Ryder and Funaki save themselves from elimination. Masters catches Finlay in the Masterlock, only to get kicked in the face to put Chris out. Kozlov gets rid of the Hart Dynasty but Knox gets rid of Kozlov. Funaki and Goldust are out next with Regal putting Gaspard out a few seconds later. Finlay dumps Regal and Ryder eliminates Reks. We’re down to Santino, Tatsu, Yang, Ryder, Finlay, Archer, Carlito and Knox. The fans get behind Santino and he brings out the Cobra to clean house, only to get dumped by Finlay, making him the most hated man in the stadium.

Yang fires off some nice kicks to Archer but he’s quickly eliminated, as is Archer via a kick from Tatsu. To show how annoying Striker can get with nicknames, he calls Tatsu “the Poison Fist of the Pacific Rim.” Uh, sure. Hornswoggle makes his annual appearance to throw Finlay the shillelagh. Knox gets knocked out and there’s a tadpole splash, followed by Carlito being tossed. Ryder dumps Knox and Finlay from behind but Ryder goes after Hornswoggle, allowing Tatsu to kick him out for the win at 8:34.

Rating: D+. This would be the traditional not great battle royal but it was cool to see someone young getting a win for a change. You could see a lot of new names showing up around the company, though a lot of them really never went anywhere. Unfortunately that would include Tatsu, who never went much higher than this, partially due to ECW not being around to take away some of the roster spots.

We open with another fly over.

Fantasia (from American Idol) sings America the Beautiful.

The set is a big pyramid made of Titantron screens. It’s another cool idea.

The opening video talks about how many people spent their lives reaching this night but now the page turns. For some it’s a new story and for some it’s the end. Tonight is their chance to earn their moment, which would become the most important thing Wrestlemania offered in years to come.

There’s a really cool miniature cylinder that lowers from the ceiling before every match with the Titantron video playing.

Tag Team Titles: R-Truth/John Morrison vs. The Miz/Big Show

R-Truth is a rapper still around today and is challenging along with Morrison. Miz is US Champion and there are still four Tag Team Title belts a year after the titles were unified. The champs have their themes put together and it really doesn’t work. Miz and Morrison get things going with John scoring off a slam before it’s off to Truth.

That’s about it for the good times though as Show comes in and throws Truth across the ring. Morrison gets knocked off the apron but he’s still able to kick Show off the middle rope to save Truth. Back to Miz vs. Morrison as Truth stupidly dives at Show, earning himself a ram into the post. Morrison rolls out of the Skull Crushing Finale and into a nice rollup for two, only to have Show knock him cold to retain at 3:26.

Rating: D. Well they made good time. I’m not sure why they got out of there so fast but maybe the rest of the show was running long. It’s not like this was missing much by turning it into a Raw match so it’s acceptable. The tag division was getting stagnant again but at least Miz was flying up the charts.

Video on Wrestlemania week in Phoenix.

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

These three were part of a group called Legacy but the young guys (Ted Jr. and Cody if that’s not clear) rebelled, basically turning Randy face again in the process. This is officially a triple threat but it starts as a glorified handicap match. Rhodes gets clotheslined to the floor so Orton can stomp Ted down. The numbers quickly catch up with him though and the double stomping begins to some INSANE booing.

They take turns holding Orton so the other can get in some right hands, followed by a double suplex. A DiBiase clothesline stops Orton’s comeback but as is the case in almost every triple threat match ever, the two who work together get in a fight over who gets the pin. They fight to the floor and the crowd is suddenly much more silent. Striker: “Perhaps a future Wrestlemania main event right here.”

Orton makes his comeback and Rhodes takes out DiBiase by mistake. Striker says that’s Wrestlemania experience. Most people would call it wrestling experience in general but Striker is the professional. The double elevated DDT, which Cole has never seen before (certainly not at Wrestlemania), takes Rhodes and DiBiase down. The Punt knocks Rhodes out and the RKO ends DiBiase at 9:01.

Rating: C. So much for Rhodes and DiBiase. Cody would be fine but DiBiase never did anything in WWE after this (to be fair he hadn’t done much in the first place). Orton was on fire again as his style and finisher are way too easy to cheer, yet for some reason WWE insists on making him a heel, even though the crowd is almost always going to turn him back.

Vickie Guerrero and her fellow heel divas promise to win their ten Divas tag. Jillian Hall (now a horrible singer, which may have been designed to make fun of Brooke Hogan) comes in to sing Simply the Best. All of the other women leave so here’s Santino for a Slim Jim commercial. He takes a bite and Jillian becomes Mae Young. Another bite turns her into Gene Okerlund (in the same dress) and a third turns Okerlund into Melina. No more biting as Santino leaves with another good looking woman.

Kofi Kingston vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne vs. Jack Swagger vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Matt Hardy vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Kane vs. Christian

Money in the Bank with TEN ENTRANTS. Thankfully they would split it up next year where they went with two eight man versions. Bourne is a high flier, Swagger is a really good amateur wrestler, Ziggler has gone from nothing to a solid midcarder, McIntyre is an arrogant young Scottish wrestler and the Intercontinental Champion and Kane has a black eye for reasons that aren’t explained.

Standard wild brawl to start with MVP throwing in a ladder but Drew intercepts it and climbs until Matt makes the save. Seven guys all try to climb the same ladder to predictable results. Bourne gets chokeslammed over the top and down onto a bunch of people. Kofi knocks the ladder over to send Drew and Matt into the top rope. Now it’s Christian going up but Ziggler runs up and pulls him down, which is called a Zig Zag. That’s quite the stretch.

MVP knocks Kane to the floor but walks into Pay Dirt (jumping downward spiral) from Shelton. Swagger uses the top of the ladder to stop some climbs until Bourne drops him as well. Christian and Matt bring in ladders and slide them into the rings of the one standing, creating two platforms and crushing Swagger in the middle in the process. They climb up onto the platforms while Bourne is on the side of the ladder and this isn’t ending well.

Swagger shoves Matt’s ladder away and Bourne breaks up a Killswitch onto the platform by knocking Christian face first into the ladder. Instead of going for the case, Evan hits Air Bourne (shooting star) and then tries to go up, allowing Matt to hiptoss him to the mat in a huge crash. Swagger shoves Matt onto the bridged ladder but gets pulled down by MVP. Shelton and MVP fight to the floor where Kane takes them both out with a ladder.

Back in and Kane shoves the ladder over to drop Ziggler before throwing the ladder away. He’s not done though as Ziggler gets chokeslammed onto another ladder and then crushed inside of it. Kane crushes him so much that he breaks the ladder in two. Kofi is back in with Trouble in Paradise but now he has no ladder (because getting another of the more than half dozen on the floor is out of the question) so he gets an idea.

Kingston picks up both halves of the ladder and uses them as stilts, only to have McIntyre break it up because the stilts idea, while VERY creative, is also kind of stupid. Matt stops Drew’s attempt by crotching him on the top rope but Christian goes up to slow Hardy. They both have to knock Kane off, followed by a reverse DDT from Christian to put them both down. Christian goes back up but Swagger knocks him down and pulls down the briefcase (taking his sweet time to do so) for the win at 13:44.

Rating: C+. This is the weakest of the Money in the Banks that they’ve had yet and again it’s due to having so many people. In the last five minutes of this match, several people just disappeared while everyone else did their thing. If you’re not going to do anything with most of the people, stop having them in the match and put them in a match somewhere else on the card.

Swagger would become one of the weaker World Champions of all time, which is a big reason why he’s in the spot he’s in five years later. Instead of being a solid midcarder, he’s that guy who used to be World Champion and has fallen this far. It’s a major problem with something like Money in the Bank: instead of building someone else up, someone jumps to the title scene but doesn’t have any roots to support them. It happened with Swagger and it would happen again later.

Extreme Rules ad.

Hall of Fame, with Ted DiBiase headlining. He called this one of the few moments you can’t put a price on and made $100 bills fall from the ceiling, even though that’s not something he would have done in his day.

The Class of 2010 includes Stu Hart (represented by most of his kids), Wendi Richter, Mad Dog Vachon (in a wheelchair), Antonio Inoki, Bob Uecker (he deserves it), Gorgeous George (represented by his wife) and Ted DiBiase. It’s a bit of a smaller class this year which is something they need to address in the future. Something they don’t need to address is the awesome music that plays for this every year. It’s really good stuff.

We recap Sheamus vs. HHH. Sheamus won the Raw World Title in December 2009 in a huge upset but then lost it at No Way Put 2010 when HHH eliminated him in the Elimination Chamber for his first loss (assuming you ignore ECW). Sheamus wanted to fight HHH one on one at Wrestlemania to prove that the pin in the Chamber was a fluke. HHH compared Sheamus to himself back in 1996 when he tried to fight Ultimate Warrior and got crushed (you almost never hear about that anymore). It’s a simple story here but one that has worked for years.

Sheamus vs. HHH

They circle each other to start and HHH slaps him in the face. An early Pedigree attempt doesn’t work so it’s a suplex and knee drop for two instead. Sheamus’ attempt to bail outside doesn’t work as HHH drags him back in for a Figure Four because we haven’t praised Flair recently enough. Sheamus grabs the ropes and takes it outside for a whip into the steps as Striker tries to dub HHH the Ace of Spades.

Two straight Irish Curse backbreakers put HHH down as the match slows a lot. An ax handle gets two and some simple right hands to the face get the same. We hit the chinlock because this is the point in a WWE style match where you would put on a chinlock. After a powerslam, Sheamus grabs an armbar. Dude come on. HHH fights up out of the devastating armbar (because nothing else had been done to his arm) and grabs a DDT.

The high knee and facebuster get two but Sheamus counters the Pedigree into the Brogue Kick for two (of course HHH gets to be one of if not the first person to kick out of it). After the spinebuster sends Sheamus to the apron, another Brogue Kick drops HHH. No cover though as HHH pops up and hits the Pedigree for the pin at 12:10.

Rating: C+. Good power match here, assuming you ignore HHH kicking out of one of Sheamus’ finishers (to be fair it wasn’t his big finisher yet, as a Razor’s Edge called the High Cross was still his go to move) and get the pin that he didn’t need. Sheamus would win the rematch at Extreme Rules 2010 in the standard formula: HHH wins the big match on the big stage but loses the rematch as a consolation prize.

We recap Rey Mysterio vs. CM Punk. Mysterio had cost Punk a spot in Money in the Bank so Punk and his Straight Edge Society (a stable led by Punk as a near religious figure who would save them from their lives of addiction by the powers of a straight edge lifestyle) went after Rey, including interrupting Rey bringing his daughter into the ring on her birthday. Rey wouldn’t fight with his family there so Punk branded him a coward. The match was set for Wrestlemania and if Rey loses, he has to join the Straight Edge Society.

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Punk has Luke Gallows and Serena (a talented wrestler who rarely got in the ring in WWE) with him. Before the match, Punk accuses the 70,000+ people here of being on drugs or alcohol, thinking it would make all of their problems go away. After tonight’s win, Punk will see all these people join him as one nation under Punk with sobriety for all. This year Rey is dressed as one of the aliens from Avatar which didn’t work all that well as it looked like his normal attire outside of the piece of black hair on the back of his mask.

Punk (with G.I. Joe themed trunks) jumps him from behind to start as Striker says Punk’s mind is a vile pigsty. Rey gets caught in the Tree of Woe but pulls himself up to avoid a baseball slide, sending Punk up against the post. That’s not enough to slow Punk down though as he drops Rey face first onto the steps and puts on a chinlock. Rey gets up but his springboard cross body is caught in a belly to belly for two.

Punk holds him down with a test of strength grip until Rey fights up and springboards to the top for a moonsault into a DDT (that looked way better than I was expecting). Another moonsault is caught in the GTS (Go To Sleep) but Rey grabs the rope to save himself. Rey kicks him down and tries a frog splash but Punk sits up just in time. Back up and Serena saves Punk from a 619, only to have it connect a few seconds later, setting up the springboard splash for the pin at 6:30.

Rating: C. This could have been good with some more time but there’s only so much you can do for a big match in less than seven minutes. The Straight Edge Society was a cool concept and had a lot of potential but they lost almost every important match they had, which ultimately led to the stable falling apart.

We recap Bret vs. Vince. As mentioned earlier, Bret returned on the January 4, 2010 Monday Night Raw and seemed to make peace with Vince, only to have Vince kick him low. Eventually Bret broke his leg in a car wreck backstage which was finally enough for Vince to sign for the match. Bret agreed to wrestle with the injury after being called a coward. Vince signed the contract and gloated, but as he turned around, Bret’s cast was on the table and his leg was just fine. You would think seeing Bret goldbricking for years would have taught Vince something but no one ever seemed to get the idea.

Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon

Anything goes. For reasons that I’ll never understand, they remixed Bret’s music for his return. Bret is in jean shorts here because this is going to be a fight instead of a match. Before the match, Vince says Bret deserves a Wrestlemania sized screwing. Therefore, he’s paid to have the Hart Family at ringside (well at least the ones that will talk to him) as lumberjacks and Bret’s brother Bruce (in sunglasses of course) is going to be guest referee.

We’re still not ready to go though because Bret says that the Harts were on to Vince in the first place and it’s Vince that is going to get screwed. Bret slugs him out to the floor to start and the Hart Dynasty gives him a Hart Attack off the top. Back in and Bret starts in on the knee, sending Vince bailing to the floor. He can’t quite get underneath the ring but does find a crowbar.

Bret punches it out of his hand though and beats on him for a bit, followed by stomping away at the “lower abdomen”. Someone throws Bret a chair so he can have a seat for a bit. Bret beats on him with the chair for a good while and Vince appears to be in shock. The Sharpshooter finally makes Vince tap at 11:09.

Rating: A. This was all it needed to be and exactly what people were expecting. Neither guy is a wrestler anymore so having the Hart Family, especially Kidd and Hart-Smith, helped a good bit. There was never any doubt as to what this was going to be and while it went a bit longer than it needed to, it did everything it needed to.

Wrestlemania XXVII is in Atlanta. Cole promises a great guest host.

The attendance is 72,219, again not announced as a record.

We recap Edge vs. Chris Jericho. They had been the Tag Team Champions in June 2009 but Edge had destroyed his Achilles and put him on the shelf for a very long time. He returned early at the 2010 Royal Rumble to win in a major surprise. Edge immediately chose to challenge Jericho for the Smackdown World Title because they suddenly hated each other, even though there wasn’t a very strong reason for them to. Edge threatened to spear Jericho over and over again which was really the only thing he said during the buildup.

Smackdown World Title: Chris Jericho vs. Edge

Jericho is defending and shoulders Edge down to start before Edge charges into a boot in the corner. The early threat of a spear sends Jericho bailing to the floor but he avoids a baseball slide and hits one of his own to put Edge on the floor. Striker name drops Sexton Hardcastle (Edge’s pre-WWE name) as Jericho puts on a chinlock. Back up and gets draped over the top rope, only to knock Jericho off the apron and into the announcers’ table.

That goes nowhere so Jericho rolls through a high cross body for two. They’re really not burning the place up out there. The Walls and Codebreaker are both blocked but the spear is countered into the Walls for our first big spot. Edge rolls out of that as well and gets two off a small package. The Lionsault misses and the Edge-O-Matic gets two more. Jericho walks into the Impaler for the same but Edge is winded.

With Edge in trouble, Jericho loads up a spear of his own (Striker: “WHAT A GENIUS MOVE!”) only to charge into a boot to the face. Edge tries his own spear but runs into a one knee Codebreaker for two. Jericho starts in on the ankle before putting on the Walls. He gets smarter though and goes with a single leg crab which really cranks on the ankle. Edge gets to the ropes because it’s just a half crab so Jericho goes to get the belt. As you would expect, the referee is bumped a few seconds later and the belt shot gets two on Edge. The Codebreaker connects for the clean(ish) pin to retain the title at 15:48.

Rating: B-. This took some time but was really getting going near the end. Again though, it feels like it got cut off short and that’s getting annoying tonight. At least it worked while it lasted, especially for one of Edge’s first major matches back. This is still a weird feud but since it’s WWE, you know this isn’t ending with one match.

Post match Edge goes after Jericho again and throws him on the announcers’ table. A big run down the tables sets up a spear to drive Jericho through the barricade and set up a rematch. That would have worked a lot better if the pin had come off the belt shot instead of the Codebreaker.

We look at the pre-show battle royal because the matches haven’t been cut short enough already.

Maryse/Michelle McCool/Alicia Fox/Layla/Vickie Guerrero vs. Eve Torres/Beth Phoenix/Mickie James/Kelly Kelly/Gail Kim

Michelle is Women’s Champion and Maryse is Divas Champion. All of the villains save for Vickie bail to start, leaving her to face Beth. Vickie gets beaten up in the corner to start but Michelle makes the save with a Faithbreaker (Styles Clash) to Kelly. Everyone comes in and it’s time for a parade of finishers until it’s only Beth left standing against Vickie. Michelle saves the praying Guerrero and lays out Beth. Kelly is still down so Vickie goes up top (again with help from Michelle and Layla) for a “hog splash” and the pin at 3:26.

Rating: D. Well at least it was quick. The Divas were in a weird place here as they were trying to find a new top name but everyone was kind of getting lost in the shuffle. Laycool (Layla and Michelle) were trying but they needed some top stars. Kelly eventually became the main star, even though she was just a model who could only kind of work a match. Anyway, this was a nothing match that was only there for the Vickie stuff, which was another problem around this time.

We recap Batista vs. John Cena. Batista had helped the McMahons out of a few jams so he was granted a title shot at Cena’s Raw World Title right after Cena had won the title in the Elimination Chamber. This turned into a feud over who was the bigger star in the last five years because Batista thought he should be the face of the company. Batista had won their first major showdown at Summerslam 2008 but Cena said he was here because he loves it instead of for the money like Batista did.

Raw World Title: Batista vs. John Cena

Batista is defending and you can feel how big this really is. Cena is introduced by the United States Air Force Honor Guard Drill Team. The fans aren’t exactly thrilled with Cena but that’s the standard anymore. They do the big power lockup to start and Cena actually takes him down with a headlock. That goes nowhere so Batista fights up and hits a clothesline to the back of the head to take over.

Batista gets into his gloating power offense but Cena grabs a quick suplex to get a breather. An early AA attempt is countered into a DDT for two and now Batista gets his real advantage. We hit the chinlock with a body scissors (Striker: “Look at this potential submission hold!” Just stop. Please.) but Cena fights up and wins a slugout, only to get caught in a neckbreaker. Now we get the real Cena comeback with all his usual stuff, including the STF which sends Batista crawling to the ropes. A quick spear gets two for the champ and both guys are down.

They head to the top for a test of strength on the ropes (that’s a new one) until Cena headbutts him to the mat. A top rope Shuffle looks to set up the AA but Batista counters into the Batista Bomb for two. Another AA attempt is countered into a reverse suplex but Cena counters into a tilt-a-whirl slam, only to muscle Batista up into an AA for a really close near fall. Cena goes up top again for the Fameasser but dives into a spinebuster (Striker: “That’s how he broke his neck the last time!” No it wasn’t Striker.). Another Batista Bomb is countered into the STF and Batista taps at 13:30 to make Cena a nine time World Champion.

Rating: B+. That’s the only kind of match these two needed to have as they’re just beating the heck out of each other the whole way with big move after big move. It’s also a big stadium style match which almost always makes for a really good atmosphere. Much like the build, I’m not sure what else there is to say here. It’s Cena vs. Batista at Wrestlemania. You really don’t need any more of an explanation.

We recap the main event, which all stems from last year. Shawn’s loss has eaten at him for a year now and he has to beat Undertaker to exercise his demons once and for all. Undertaker wouldn’t fight him again so Shawn cost him the World Title at No Way Out 2010. That was enough for the match to be made but Undertaker wanted Shawn’s career on the line. Shawn agreed because if he can’t beat Undertaker, he doesn’t want to wrestle anymore.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

No DQ and no countout. Shawn just walks down but Undertaker makes his big entrance by rising up through the stage. Shawn breaks up the staredown with a throat slit of his own so Undertaker pounds on him in the corner early. Snake Eyes and the big boot set up Old School but Undertaker might have tweaked his knee. Shawn goes right after the knee to break up a chokeslam and starts in on the arm for some reason. Striker: “Shawn Michaels is very adept at submission grappling.” For the love of all things good and holy will someone SHUT HIM UP???

The threat of Sweet Chin Music sends Undertaker up against the ropes and it’s back to the knee. Undertaker knocks him to the floor and teases the Taker Dive but Shawn charges back in and grabs the leg. A reverse Figure Four doesn’t work and Shawn is sent into the post to keep Undertaker in control. The apron legdrop is a pretty stupid move and Shawn slaps on the Figure Four.

Undertaker does the sit up and turns it over so Shawn immediately breaks. At least he’s smart enough to let go as so many other people just let it stay on forever. Since Shawn let go so fast, his knee is good enough for the forearm and nipup, only to walk into a chokeslam for two. The Tombstone doesn’t work as Shawn crawls down Undertaker’s body and grabs an ankle lock, complete with a grapevine.

Undertaker gets Shawn on his back and kicks him in the face to break it up (Shawn’s stunned look is great). The big man heads outside but has to catch Shawn’s springboard cross body, countering it into a Tombstone on the floor. Somehow that only gets two so it’s a Last Ride but Shawn counters with an X Factor/Undertaker’s leg gives out (some combination of both) to give Michaels two. The top rope elbow hits knees and thankfully Undertaker’s knees are more banged up than Shawn.

Hell’s Gate goes on out of nowhere but Shawn counters into a rollup for two in an awesome reversal. Sweet Chin Music is good for two more. Another superkick is blocked and now the Last Ride connects for a big near fall. Striker: “We’ve auditioned our entire lives for this moment!” It’s time to load up the announcers’ table but the Last Ride is escaped and Undertaker takes Sweet Chin Music onto the table. Shawn’s moonsault onto the table only hits Undertaker’s legs and both guys are done.

Back in and Shawn hits Sweet Chin Music as well as he can but Undertaker kicks out again. Yet another attempt at the superkick is countered into a chokeslam. Undertaker’s knee won’t let him cover so it’s a Tombstone for two, even with Undertaker’s tongue sticking out. There go the straps and Undertaker tells Shawn to stay down. Shawn is on his knees and does another throat slit, admitting that he just can’t do it. Undertaker doesn’t move so Shawn slaps him in the face, triggering a jumping Tombstone to end Shawn’s career at 24:01.

Rating: A. It’s not an A+ because it’s just a hair beneath last year but sweet goodness this is amazing. The leg work made for a good story and the symbolism of the second throat slit was perfect. Shawn going out at Wrestlemania really was the only way to go about it and this was the kind of match he deserved to go out on. Outstanding stuff from one of the best big match performers ever.

That isn’t to take away from Undertaker though, who continues to take this Streak and his career to places that never seemed possible before. Ever since that Batista match it’s been classic after classic in an amazing career resurgence. Undertaker ending Shawn’s career was great and the jumping Tombstone made it even better. This was more than just trading finishers as the story told of Undertaker trying to hang on and Shawn fighting for everything he had and just not being good enough. This was great stuff and another classic.

Undertaker poses and helps Shawn up. Shawn soaks in all the cheers and takes his time going up the aisle, shaking a lot of hands. Shawn: “I’m going to drive my kids crazy in three weeks!” After applauding the fans, Shawn walks off to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. This is a heck of a show with the double main event taking up the last fourth of the show. There’s nothing too terrible on here save for the opener and Divas match which combined to be less than seven minutes in the ring. Some of the stuff in the middle isn’t great but it’s certainly good enough to get by. This was another really good show as Wrestlemania is on a hot streak. Well save for XXV of course.

Ratings Comparison

Awesome Truth vs. ShoMiz

Original: D

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo:

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

Christian vs. Matt Hardy vs. Kane vs. Jack Swagger vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne

Original: B

2013 Redo: C+

HHH vs. Sheamus

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C+

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C

Mr. McMahon vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Original: A-

2013 Redo: B

Beth Phoenix/Kevin Kelly/Mickie James/Gail Kim/Eve Torres vs. Vickie Guerrero/Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

John Cena vs. Batista

Original: A

2013 Redo: B+

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A

2013 Redo: B+

Dang and I liked it even better on the first view. I might have been closer to right a few years back.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/04/03/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-26-john-cena-vs-batista-do-you-need-more/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/04/04/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxvi-goodbye-mr-wrestlemania/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Smackdown
Date: March 18, 2022
Location: Spectrum Center, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

Wrestlemania is two weeks from tomorrow and we have most of the card set. There are still some matches to be made, but most of this show is probably going to be about building on what has already been started. That can make for some successful shows, but the stories need to be good in the first place. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In memory of Scott Hall.

We open with a recap of Roman Reigns attacking Brock Lesnar at Madison Square Garden, leading to Lesnar trying to eat Paul Heyman last week.

Here is the Bloodline to get things going. Reigns tells the crowd to acknowledge him before moving on to Lesnar. Hold on though as Heyman interrupts, saying that due to a bad weather patter, Lesnar is stuck in Canada and will not be here tonight. The fans want Lesnar and Reigns says he wants the same thing.

Reigns talks about how he would have smashed Lesnar had be been here but keeps cutting off Heyman from saying something else. He finally lets Heyman give his update: Lesnar has landed and he’s on his way here! Heyman: “WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?” Reigns: “I know what I’m gonna do: I’m gonna let you wrap it up and we’re gonna get out of here.” Everyone bails in a hurry after a runny moments from Reigns.

After a look at what’s coming tonight, the Bloodline is running away and gets in their car. Cue Lesnar, on a forklift (which was apparently just laying around), to stab the lift through the car and, during a break, turn it its side. The Bloodline escapes and gets in a truck, which Lesnar chases down and rips a door off as they peel out again. Lesnar even dropped his hat.

Here is Lesnar in the arena, with the truck door, saying he is a little fired up. Roman Reigns has unleashed the bipolar beast. In two weeks, at Wrestlemania, Lesnar is going to do more than blow the door off because he’s coming for blood so Reigns better be prepared.

We look back at Rick Boogs earning a Tag team Title shot at Wrestlemania for himself and Shinsuke Nakamura.

Rick Boogs/Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Los Lotharios

Humberto and Nakamura start things off, with Nakamura not being thrilled at the kiss blown his way. COME ON sets up the beatdown to start, including Good Vibrations in the corner. The running knee to the ribs gets two so it’s Angel coming in to take over with some double teaming. Angel TAKES OFF HIS PANTS and it’s a double basement dropkick to the back for two on Nakamura.

That doesn’t last long but the comeback is cut off so Nakamura can get beaten down some more. A cheap shot takes Boogs off the apron and a running shot to the face gets two on Nakamura. That’s broken up this time though and the hot tag brings in Boogs to start cleaning house. The Boogs Cruise finishes Angel at 4:46.

Rating: C. Now this is the kind of match that can do some good for Nakamura and Boogs. While they’re somewhat established as a team, they can use a few more wins on the way to their title shot. Granted it might have made more sense to do that the other way around, but at least they are starting to put something together and that is how you build a team up.

We look back at Drew McIntyre fighting off a three on one beatdown last week.

Happy Corbin is ready to win, though Madcap Moss’ joke (What do you call an episode of Happy Time that puts everyone to sleep? Nappy time!) has everyone looking at him.

Viking Raiders/Drew McIntyre vs. Happy Corbin/Shanky/Jinder Mahal

Madcap Moss is here with the villains. Shanky takes Erik into the corner to start so it’s off to Mahal, who gets dropped by the Vikings. Ivar cleans house but Corbin plants him with a spinebuster and we take a break. Back with Mahal putting Ivar in a chinlock, which is broken up without much trouble. The hot tag brings in McIntyre to take out Mahal and Shanky as Corbin and Moss watch from the floor. A Michinoku Driver sets up the Claymore to finish Shanky at 7:14.

Rating: C-. It is becoming more and more clear that there is little way to make Corbin vs. McIntyre interesting. McIntyre is on another level than Corbin and it feels like they are trying to fill in as much time as they can before the match and its inevitable ending. This wasn’t even that interesting of a match, but some of that might have to do with how little I care to see the end result.

Sami Zayn is sick of Johnny Knoxville and his childish pranks. Zayn wants their Wrestlemania match to be anything goes.

Sasha Banks/Naomi vs. Rhea Ripley/Liv Morgan

Carmella and Queen Zelina are at ringside. Morgan and Banks start things off with Banks wristdragging her down. They trade rollups for two each and stereo dropkicks give us a standoff. Naomi comes in and takes Liv down for the splits splash but it’s off to Ripley instead. As Carmella shows off her engagement ring, Ripley hits a basement dropkick for two on Naomi and then powers out of a headlock.

Banks gets her chance but can’t manage a suplex on the bigger Ripley. Instead Ripley hits a delayed vertical suplex for two, allowing the tag back to Morgan. Banks and Naomi are sent outside so Ripley can cannonball them down from the apron as we take a break (with the champs being very happy).

We come back with McAfee pointing out that these three teams were all thrown together as Ripley fights out of a chinlock. Banks comes back in for the double knees in the corner to Morgan, setting up the middle rope Meteora for two. Morgan enziguris her way out of trouble so Ripley can come in with a heck of a missile dropkick for two on Banks. Riptide is broken up though and it’s a Backstabber from Banks to set up the split legged moonsault for two, with Morgan diving in for the save. A double superplex to Ripley is turned into a Tower of Doom….but Natalya and Shayna Baszler come in for the double DQ at 11:50.

Rating: B-. This was cooking near the end but then they had to do something to add yet another thrown together team into the Wrestlemania title match. Fair enough as they already have two thrown together teams so why not make it a third? I do like that neither of the teams took a fall, but dang I wanted to see more of this and the interference was a letdown.

Post match the big beatdown is on with the champs joining in. Natalya and Baszler say they’re coming for the titles so Carmella and Vega get nervous. Some Natalya sign pointing makes things even more clear.

Johnny Knoxville is in on the anything goes deal.

Pat McAfee has been summoned to Vince McMahon’s office.

Sonya Deville approves of Natalya and Shayna Baszler, so they’re in the Women’s Tag Team Title match too.

Here is McAfee back in the arena and getting into the ring. McAfee talks about seeing professional wrestling (his words) for the first time as a kid and it shaped him forever. He always wanted to do something and after he retired from the NFL, he got a call from Michael Cole, who offered him a job doing commentary on Smackdown.

McAfee talks about going from city to city but here is Austin Theory to interrupt. As per Vince McMahon’s orders, McAfee has to apologize for last week, so McAfee apologizes for giving him that beat. He also apologizes for Theory’s parents hating him and for Theory being a punk b****. Theory takes a selfie, laughs about the apology, and shoves McAfee being running off.

We look back at Brock Lesnar chasing the Bloodline into the parking lot and ripping the door off the hinges.

Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura go mountain biking.

Kofi Kingston vs. Ridge Holland

Butch and Sheamus are here too. Before the match, we look at Big E.’s injury and his various messages, including saying how touched he is by the outpouring of success and promising to get better. It’s a brawl to start with Holland being knocked outside and Kofi trust falls him into the announcers’ table. We take a break and come back with Kofi fighting out of a chinlock and chopping away. Kofi starts the real comeback and hits the Boom Drop but a Sheamus distraction lets Butch shove Kofi off the top. Butch gets ejected but tries to come back in. That’s enough of a distraction for Holland to hit Northern Grit for the pin at 6:52.

Rating: C. I think you can see where this is going and that would be Xavier Woods returning to help Kingston even the odds up a little bit. I double they get a third person for the match but at least 3-2 is a bit better. Holland winning is certainly a way to go here, but they did at least offer him a bit of remorse by having commentary talk about him apologizing to Big E. It isn’t meant to be some evil deed but rather an accident and I think I like that better than exploiting such a terrible situation.

Long recap of Ronda Rousey vs. Charlotte’s recent issues, with Rousey making Charlotte tap to the ankle lock. Charlotte couldn’t make Rousey tap last week though and frustration seems to have set in.

Here is Charlotte for the closing chat. Charlotte talks about her dominance and says no one has caused Ronda Rousey more pain than her. She is going to beat Rousey at Wrestlemania because she is the mountain that Rousey has to climb. Rousey does not have what it takes to win so she will go back home and make another baby after it’s over. Actually Charlotte can’t wait, so come out here right now and take a beating in Charlotte’s hometown.

Cue Rousey, ignoring Kayla Braxton’s warnings that it might be a trap, but Charlotte pulls out a kendo stick. Rousey ducks the big swing though and goes for the armbar, sending Charlotte outside. That’s fine with Rousey, who follows her out for the ankle lock. Charlotte breaks that up with a kendo stick shot but the choking won’t make Rousey tap. Instead, Charlotte powerbombs her through the announcers’ table to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I can always go for a show that feels like it has goals in mind and then sets out to accomplish those goals. That is what we got here, as this show focused on a variety of either Wrestlemania matches or stories that are going to become Wrestlemania matches and built them up. Wrestlemania has needed some shows like this and it was nice to see one that didn’t go flying off the rails. My one issue: Ricochet was nowhere to be seen and seems to be waiting on a last second addition to make Wrestlemania. He’s the Intercontinental Champion and that shouldn’t be his best option.

Results
Rick Boogs/Shinsuke Nakamura b. Los Lotharios – Boogs Cruise to Angel
Viking Raiders/Drew McIntyre b. Happy Corbin/Jinder Mahal/Shanky – Claymore to Shanky
Sasha Banks/Naomi vs. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley went to a double DQ when Shayna Baszler and Natalya interfered
Ridge Holland b. Kofi Kingston – Northern Grit

 

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: March 11, 2022
Location: Legacy Arena, Birmingham, Alabama
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

We are rapidly approaching Wrestlemania and the card is probably about half done. There are still a lot of matches left to be set for the card and it would be nice to see one or more of those matches being added this week. WWE has already set up more than a few matches and stories for the show so at least they have something started. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look at Brock Lesnar getting beaten down by the Bloodline at Madison Square Garden, leaving him a bloody mess.

Here is a ticked off Brock Lesnar (who looks perfectly fine and is already back six days after that kind of a beating because taking your time is a lost concept in modern wrestling) who gets right to the point. He doesn’t care about Wrestlemania contracts or WWE Titles (which he throws out of the ring) because all he wants is Reigns’ blood.

Lesnar demands that Reigns get out here but he gets Paul Heyman instead. Heyman says Lesnar wants Reigns….but Reigns isn’t here tonight for Lesnar’s protection. Lesnar: “If Reigns isn’t here, who is going to protect you Paul?” The chase is on (with Heyman running more than he has in years) but Lesnar stops to beat up security, allowing Heyman to escape in a car.

We look back at Sheamus and Ridge Holland destroying Big E.’s ATV.

Sheamus and Holland, still with their sledgehammers, saying they improved the ATV by making it lighter. They want a real fight night tonight and they have someone who wants in on it: Butch, better known as Pete Dunne in a hat (who looks a bit miserable, but that might be Dunne). This is a brilliant idea, because when you have Pete Dunne, a 20 something year old phenom, your best bet is to set him up for Bushwhackers jokes.

New Day vs. Sheamus/Ridge Holland

Butch is here with Sheamus and Ridge. New Day goes after Sheamus before the bell to start so we settle down to Holland taking Kofi down and dropping a knee to the face. Kofi hits a springboard dropkick for two so it’s off to Sheamus vs. Big E. The chase is on and Sheamus catches him with the forearms to the chest. Everything breaks down and Kofi hits a flip dive onto Holland, leaving Big E. to miss the apron splash. A jumping knee drops Big E. and we take a break.

Back with McAfee explaining that we may have known Butch by another name but Sheamus and Holland know him as Butch. My goodness it never ceases to amaze me how this company makes things more complicated than they need to be. Kofi kicks Sheamus down and loads up Trouble in Paradise but a Holland distraction breaks it up. SOS gets two instead with Holland making the save. Big E. misses the dive to the floor and Holland suplexes him ONTO HIS HEAD, leaving him down on the floor. Butch offers a distraction and Sheamus Brogue Kicks Kofi for the pin at 9:25.

Rating: C. The match was pretty good but oh my goodness that suplex was terrifying. These injuries keep happening with Holland and it might be time to take another look at him being in this spot. It keeps happening over and over and that is not something that can continue. What matters is him being ok, because that was absolutely terrifying. As for the match itself, it was hard to focus due to the injury and WWE making Pete Dunne an Oliver Twist cosplayer.

We take a long look at Kevin Owens challenging Steve Austin for Wrestlemania and Austin accepting. It is almost strange to see Austin doing a regular look at the camera promo like this.

Sami Zayn is mad about losing his Intercontinental Title and it is made even worse by seeing a clip of Johnny Knoxville having a banner, featuring Sami’s phone number on a banner. That hasn’t sat well with Sami, but he knows he can overcome Ricochet in his rematch for the Intercontinental Title this week.

Drew McIntyre/Viking Raiders vs. Jinder Mahal/Happy Corbin/Madcap Moss

McIntyre comes to the ring but we see the villains jumping the Raiders in the back. McIntyre slowly walks towards the back and here are Mahal and Shanky to go after him, with Moss and Corbin joining in. That is broken up without much trouble, leaving McIntyre to stare Corbin down. Everyone else gets back up and McIntyre gets caught in the ring, with Corbin laughing in his face. McIntyre fights up and clears the ring, making me wonder why in the world I’m supposed to want to see this match at Wrestlemania. No match of course.

We look at Ronda Rousey beating Sonya Deville last week and then making Charlotte tap out to an ankle lock.

Here is Ronda Rousey for a chat. She is ready for one of the biggest matches of her career at Wrestlemania against Charlotte. Rousey isn’t happy with Charlotte saying she is all about the armbar, because it is like saying Mike Tyson is a one trick pony because he just knocked people out. There are thousands of ways to get to an armbar, but she has spent the last few years refining the ankle lock, as taught to her by her first mentor in wrestling, Kurt Angle.

Cue Charlotte to interrupt, saying that Rousey will be in for the biggest fight of her life. Rousey needs to be worrying about winning on the biggest stage, where she won’t be tapping Charlotte out. Rousey: “Like I already did?” Charlotte calls her a one trick pony so Rousey tells her to bring it, and even offers to let her take off the high heels. Instead Charlotte walks away, with Rousey saying Charlotte is either tapping at Wrestlemania or Rousey is taking her arm home. Talking continues to not be Rousey’s strong suit but she was passable enough here.

We look at Brock Lesnar chasing Paul Heyman off earlier today. Lesnar has left too.

Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura go surfing in their latest Toyota commercial.

Sasha Banks/Naomi vs. Shayna Baszler/Natalya

Carmella and Queen Zelina are watching from ringside as Shayna takes Naomi down by the leg to start. Natalya and Shayna make a wish on Naomi’s legs and Shayna stomps on the ankle. Naomi fights up and makes the tag off to Banks, who comes in with the middle rope Meteora. Banks sends the villains outside and a sliding headscissors sends Natalya into Carmella and Vega’s general direction. Carmella offers a distraction so Zelina can fail at interference, allowing Banks to hit a basement Codebreaker for the pin on Natalya at 3:19.

Rating: C-. I cannot bring myself to care about this title match as it feels like it was thrown together first and then they are trying to make the three teams feel like they matter. They are building up Banks and Naomi after giving them the title shot, much like they are doing with Liv Morgan and Rhea Ripley. It might work if you have strong champions, but that is absolutely not the case with Zelina and Carmella. Baszler continues to be the most “just there” wrestler who could be something more, but that’s WWE for you.

Here are the Usos for a chat. They brag about their 236 day reign as Tag Team Champions, which is almost a year (not exactly) and Roman Reigns’ nearly two year reign as Universal Champion (again, not exactly). Cue Shinsuke Nakamura and Rick Boogs, the latter of whom has a taped up leg and is badly limping. The Usos laugh off the idea of these two wanting a title shot at Wrestlemania, even calling Boogs Peg Leg Pete. They can have the title shot if Boogs can beat Jey right now.

Jey Uso vs. Rick Boogs

Hold on though as Boogs takes off the leg brace and grabs Jey in a vertical suplex, where he kneels down to one knee twice before taking him down. The gorilla press (with eleven reps)….doesn’t do anything as Boogs just drops him down instead of slamming him due to Jimmy’s distraction. Boogs is right back up with the Boogs Cruise for the pin and the title shot at 1:47.

Post match Jimmy breaks the guitar over Boogs’ back to leave him laying.

Intercontinental Title: Sami Zayn vs. Ricochet

Ricochet is defending and hold on a second here as Austin Theory comes out to sit next to Pat McAfee. Before the bell, Theory gets in McAfee’s face and slaps the headset off of his head. McAfee jumps the table, with Cole shouting NOT THIS WAY and DON’T LET HIM GET TO YOU! Some security finally comes out to clear them out, with McAfee leaving commentary. Theory has to be held back and eventually leaves as we’ll have the bell after the break.

We come back with the bell ringing as Cole talks about McAfee going over the line here, because we need a Michael Cole lecture during an Intercontinental Title match. Ricochet snaps off a headscissors to take Sami down but Sami gets in a neck snap across the top rope. Back in and a sitout powerbomb gives Sami two and we hit the chinlock. Ricochet fights up and knees him down before heading up top. That takes too long though and Sami knocks him off the top for a big crash as we take a break.

Back with…actually a look at McAfee vs. Theory, which absolutely needed to be shown full screen during a title match main event. We go back to the actual match with Ricochet reversing a suplex into a hurricanrana for two. The Blue Thunder Bomb gives Sami two and he takes Ricochet up top, only to get punched back down. Sami crotches him on top though and a t-bone superplex sends Ricochet flying. Back up and the Helluva Kick is countered into the Recoil, setting up the 630 to retain the title at 12:46.

Rating: B-. Well thank goodness for that. I was scared that they were going to put the title back on Zayn for the sake of the celebrity match at Wrestlemania, so at least they did something smart for a change. Ricochet has such a track record of inconsistency so it was nice to see them actually letting him stick with it for once. Good match too, which shouldn’t be a surprise.

We cut to the back where Charlotte and Ronda Rousey are fighting next to a car. Security can’t break it up so Charlotte suplexes her onto the car. Charlotte ties up her legs and fishhooks Rousey’s mouth on the hood. One more shot to the face puts Rousey down and she tries to pull herself to her feet to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. There wasn’t much to be seen her in the way of wrestling, which left the show focused on building up stories for Wrestlemania. That makes sense on paper, but then you get to the reality of the matches they have not being very good. Between McAfee and Knoxville being featured players and Lesnar’s big contribution being chasing Heyman out of the arena, this was a show focused on a lot of midcard material. That doesn’t make for a good show and illustrates how much they are focusing on Lesnar vs. Reigns and almost nothing else. They need something else big on Smackdown, and Zayn vs. Knoxville isn’t it.

Results
Sheamus/Ridge Holland b. New Day – Brogue Kick to Kofi Kingston
Sasha Banks/Naomi b. Natalya/Shayna Baszler – Codebreaker to Natalya
Rick Boogs b. Jey Uso – Boogs Cruise
Ricochet b. Sami Zayn – 630

 

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: March 4, 2022
Location: FTX Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

We are less than a month away from Wrestlemania and the card is starting to come together. There are still some gaps that need to be filled in but now tonight we might have a better idea of how some of the title scene will look. This week features two title matches which could see some shakeups. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Paul Heyman talks about being the advocate for Roman Reigns, who will be here tonight.

Ronda Rousey is ready for her first Smackdown match.

Sonya Deville is ready to teach Rousey about authority.

The Viking Raiders are ready to hunt the Usos, rip them apart, and take the Tag Team Titles.

The Usos say the Vikings are fat.

Ricochet says he’s taking the Intercontinental Title from Sami Zayn.

Sami Zayn lists off his monikers and says after tonight, people will be talking about him being the best Intercontinental Champion.

Intercontinental Title: Ricochet vs. Sami Zayn

Ricochet is challenging and grabs a very fast rollup for two to start. Sami hits a running clothesline to slow him down and then suplexes Ricochet down on the apron as we take a break. Back with Ricochet snapping off a middle rope hurricanrana for two but Sami grabs a sitout powerbomb (with Ricochet landing hard) for two. Ricochet sends him outside and hits a handspring moonsault to take Sami down again.

Back in and Ricochet gets crotched on top, sending him outside in a crash. Cue Johnny Knoxville because of course here he is again, with Sami being distracted by the INTERCONTINENTAL CHUMP shirt. It’s enough of a distraction that Ricochet can grab a standing hurricanrana for the pin and the title at 7:35.

Rating: C+. Well ok then. I would not have have bet on that one but they had a surprise here with the title change. That is the kind of thing that they have been needing to do for Ricochet for a long time and if it means he gets a Wrestlemania title defense out of it, good for him. I know Knoxville vs. Zayn is coming, probably at Wrestlemania, but you can do that without the title just as well. I was surprised in a good way here so well done.

We look at Vince McMahon on the Pat McAfee Show, where he announced that he will be inducting the Undertaker into the Hall of Fame. He also offered McAfee a Wrestlemania match, which McAfee accepted.

Sami Zayn is losing his mind over Johnny Knoxville following him everywhere from Smackdown to social media. How about Knoxville follows him to Wrestlemania?

Cole asks McAfee who he will be facing at Wrestlemania but here is Austin Theory to interrupt. Theory introduces himself to the crowd and asks McAfee why Mr. McMahon was on his show. He finds it funny that McAfee thinks McMahon likes him (which makes McAfee laugh). Will McAfee be so happy when his jaw is wired shut?

Theory gets in his face and then slaps him, with Theory saying they’re facing off at Wrestlemania. Theory leaves and McAfee stands on the announcers’ table, telling him to come back here. With Theory gone, McAfee goes on a rant about how he was embarrassed in front of Miami and blames Michael Cole for what happened.

Naomi vs. Carmella

Sasha Banks and Queen Zelina are here too. Carmella gets her mask put on but Naomi wastes no time in kicking her in the face. Carmella is still fine enough to pull her off the top and into a chinlock, which Naomi breaks up in a hurry. Banks cuts off Zelina’s interference and it’s the split legged moonsault to give Naomi the pin at 2:07.

Happy Corbin beats Madcap Moss and some others at poker while bragging about his Wrestlemania success. That will keep going at Wrestlemania, when he beats Drew McIntyre. Moss gives us a McIntyre impression with his usual level of humor.

Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura have another Toyota Tundra commercial, this time hiking through the woods.

Drew McIntyre vs. Jinder Mahal

Shanky is here with Mahal. McIntyre gets knocked down for an early neck crank as McAfee continues to go after Cole for possibly having something to do with Theory earlier. That’s broken up and McIntyre starts hammering away until a Shanky distraction cuts him off. McIntyre takes care of him, setting up the Glasgow Kiss into the Claymore to finish Mahal at 2:04.

Post match McIntyre says he doesn’t care what Madcap Moss and Happy Corbin do. McIntyre asks for a show of hands of how many people want to gouge their eyes out when Corbin is on TV. The fans go up, including Kayla Braxton’s. McIntyre is taking Corbin out at Wrestlemania.

Back at the poker game, Corbin doesn’t like Moss’ jokes.

McAfee is very happy that Ronda Rousey is wrestling tonight.

We look back at last week’s contract signing between Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar.

Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura are coming to the ring but the Usos jump them from behind and lay them out. Cue Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman so the Bloodline can go to the ring for a chat. Miami seems very happy to see and acknowledge Reigns, who talks about how he and Brock Lesnar are defending their titles at Madison Square Garden. You already know he is going to smash someone and send them to the back of the line like he has done for a year and a half.

Then you have Lesnar, and not all of us want to see him with that title, or even at Wrestlemania. Reigns wants him to be champion at Wrestlemania though, because he wants Lesnar to hand over the title. Heyman talks about spoilers, so maybe we should give Miami a spoiler. Reigns calls his shot like Babe Ruth and he delivers every single time. The spoiler is that at Wrestlemania, he is pinning Brock Lesnar and Lesnar will acknowledge him. Reigns seemed to snap a bit with that one and Cole thinks Lesnar is in his head.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Viking Raiders

The Raiders are challenging and the Usos are sent outside to start. Ivar dives off the apron to take both of them down, setting up the top rope splash for two on Jimmy in a very near fall. Jey breaks up the Viking Experience and the champs drop the Vikings out to the floor. Ivar gets posted and Erik gets tossed down hard as we take a break. Back with Jimmy’s Superfly Splash hitting Erik’s raised knees and the Viking Experience connects, with Jey making another save. Some superkicks get two on Erik but he reverses into a cradle for the same. The 1D connects to retain the Usos’ titles at 8:20.

Rating: B-. This was almost all action but what mattered the most was I bought into the near falls. There were multiple times where I thought the titles were going to change hands and that is proof they are doing something right. I’m going to assume that Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura are up next for the Usos and that could make for an interesting match, especially since it isn’t like there are any other fresh challengers for the titles.

Earlier today, New Day rode around backstage on Big E.’s ATV.

Sheamus vs. Big E.

Ridge Holland and Kofi Kingston are here too, with Kofi getting on the ATV before the bell. Holland chairs him from behind and then chairs the ATV. Sheamus chop blocks Big E. and he and Holland steal the ATV. No match.

During the break, Sheamus and Holland destroyed the ATV.

We look back at Ricochet winning the Intercontinental Title.

Johnny Knoxville accepts Sami Zayn’s Wrestlemania challenge.

Happy Corbin and Madcap Moss are playing darts when Drew McIntyre stabs the board with his sword to run them off.

We look back at Ronda Rousey’s interview last week, with Charlotte and Sonya Deville interrupting to take her out.

Ronda Rousey vs. Sonya Deville

Charlotte comes out to watch and the distraction lets Deville go after Rousey’s bad knee. The chinlock goes on as Charlotte sits in on commentary. Rousey fights up and chokes away in the ropes, setting up Piper’s Pit. The armbar finishes Deville at 3:12.

Rating: C-. That’s all it needed to be with Rousey shrugging off whatever Deville had and then beating her with the armbar as expected. Rousey needed to look dominant like this as she should be ready for Wrestlemania and the showdown with Charlotte. The good thing is that someone like Rousey doesn’t need much reheating and she is all but ready for the title match from here.

Post match Rousey calls Charlotte into the ring and actually gets what she wants, setting up an ankle lock (playing off Charlotte talking about Rousey being a one trick pony with the armbar) to make Charlotte tap to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a show that is going to get some mixed reviews because there wasn’t much in the way of wrestling, but they did take some steps towards Wrestlemania. Two more matches have been set and that is something that WWE has been needing to do for several weeks now. The Tag Team Title match was good and I liked the title change so the show did cover some important points outside of just Wrestlemania. Pretty good show, as it did some things that needed to be done.

Results
Ricochet b. Sami Zayn – Hurricanrana
Naomi b. Carmella – Split legged moonsault
Drew McIntyre b. Jinder Mahal – Claymore
Usos b. Viking Raiders – 1D to Erik
Ronda Rousey b. Sonya Deville – Armbar

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: February 25, 2022
Location: Giant Center, Hershey, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

Elimination Chamber is out of the way and that means it is time to start getting ready for Wrestlemania. In a normal year, most of Wrestlemania would already be set but WWE doesn’t operate that way, meaning they have about five weeks to get things ready. Hopefully they can start here so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns so far this year, which has involved a lot of backstabbing and Lesnar World Title wins. As expected, all roads lead to the title vs. title showdown at Wrestlemania. The match is now officially a unification match.

Michael Cole is in the ring to introduce Ronda Rousey for a chat. Rousey talks about how she broke her hand in the main event of Wrestlemania.

Then she broke her other hand while she was rehabbing and then she got pregnant with her daughter. She wanted to come back because of her mother, who won the world championships in judo while she was a single mom and working towards her engineering degree. Cole lists off some of Rousey’s accomplishments but she would rather look forward to being the first woman in a long time to make Charlotte submit.

We see some stills of Charlotte attacking Rousey at Elimination Chamber and here is Charlotte to interrupt. She promises to make Rousey tap to the Figure Eight at Wrestlemania, meaning Rousey can go home and work on her second baby. Cue Sonya Deville to chop block Rousey from behind and the beatdown is on with the knee getting wrecked even more. Charlotte wraps it around the post a few times but Rousey still takes out Deville.

Post break, Adam Pearce makes Sonya Deville vs. Ronda Rousey for next week, with Deville not looking thrilled.

Los Lotharios vs. New Day

The rubber match and New Day comes to the ring riding an ATV, which is Kofi’s birthday gift to Big E. Kofi takes Humberto into the corner to start and it’s Big E. coming in for a running shoulder in the corner. The spanking abdominal stretch goes on before it’s Kofi jumping over Big E. for a backsplash on Humberto. Angel gets in a cheap shot though and it’s a double ram into the apron. Angel TAKES OFF HIS PANTS and we take a break.

Back with Humberto grabbing a chinlock on Kofi as Cole hypes up Los Lotharios as a huge deal. Los Lotharios do the old Rockers double leg roll but Kofi kicks Angel down anyway for a needed breather. The hot tag brings in Big E. to clean house but Angel saves Humberto from a Big Ending. The Rock Bottom out of the corner plants Angel and a wheelbarrow lift into a top rope bulldog (now the Midnight Hour) gets two with Humberto making the save.

Kofi is sent outside for a hard dive from Angel, who goes over to the ATV. Big E. isn’t having that and runs over Humberto, leaving Angel to superkick Kofi out of the air back inside. Angel goes up top…so Big E. threatens to run Humberto over with the ATV. That’s enough of a distraction for Kofi to knee Angel in the face, setting up the Midnight Hour (the traditional version) for the pin at 10:27. McAfee: “That was special.” It was good, but special?

Rating: B-. I know WWE wants this to be some big, epic feud but instead we have seen three matches between an all time team and a pretty good team. I need a bit more than that to get to some amazing level though and attempted vehicular assault didn’t exactly help things. Good TV match however and that’s always a positive.

Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura are on the road in a new Toyota Tundra truck. They go kayaking and have some more plans that we’ll see later. Good thing Nakamura is over losing his Intercontinental Title to make the commercial.

Sheamus and Ridge Holland cut off New Day on the ATV and a challenge seems to be made. New Day rides off and Sheamus is so mad that he throws his hat down.

Sam Roberts is here to interview the Usos, who are here for the Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar Wrestlemania contract signing. Reigns is going to take out Lesnar like they’re going to take out the Viking Raiders. The Raiders are said to smell bad, so here they are to jump the Usos.

We look at Xia Li saving Aliyah from a Natalya beatdown.

Xia Li is ready for her debut and has worked a long way to get here.

Xia Li vs. Natalya

Li flips over her to start and a dropkick gets an early two. Back up and Natalya’s discus clothesline gets one on Li and we hit the abdominal stretch with the leg lifted up. The fans start chanting for HERSHEY CHOCOLATE, which McAfee translates as XIA LI’S GOT IT as Li makes her comeback. Li sends her flying with a suplex and hits a spinwheel kick to finish Natalya at 4:01.

Rating: C-. You know, you bring in a woman as a striking machine who protects people and want her to get over. Maybe having her sell Natalya’s abdominal stretch in her debut isn’t the best way to go. The fans didn’t seem interested, and I can’t say I blame them. Li ran in to save Aliyah last week and then can’t even kick someone’s head off to win in ten seconds? Really?

We look back at Sami Zayn beating Shinsuke Nakamura to win the Intercontinental Title last week.

Here is a VERY happy Sami Zayn in his loud (and golden) tuxedo to say we he has FINALLY gotten his justice. The Intercontinental Title is laying on a table and there are balloons on the corners, even if they don’t match. The old Sami would say it’s just a conspiracy though and now there is a question to answer: if he was able to get the title back, was there ever a conspiracy against him in the first place? OF COURSE THERE WAS!

But that’s in the past, so now he’s willing to give Shinsuke Nakamura a rematch, but Nakamura is still putting his kneecap back together so he needs a new opponent. Cue Johnny Knoxville, because of course it’s him. Knoxville says he heard Sami say he needed a new challenger and since Sami interrupted his premiere, Knoxville is here to crash his. Sami says it isn’t going to work but Knoxville questions his testicular fortitude. That’s enough for Sami, who beats Knoxville up and hits a pair of Helluva Kicks.

This week’s Black History Month video looks at Titus O’Neil’s awesome charity work.

Adam Pearce is yelling at Sami Zayn in the back about what he did to Johnny Knoxville. Ricochet pops in to say if Sami wants to be a fighting champion, Ricochet is right here. Pearce makes the title match for next week.

Sasha Banks vs. Shotzi

Naomi joins commentary as Sasha starts fast with Two Amigos. Shotzi blocks the third but gets rolled up for two. Sasha sends her face first into the middle buckle and it’s a middle rope Meteora to drop Shotzi again. A running basement Codebreaker (that’s a new one) sets up the Bank Statement to complete the squash at 2:11.

Post match Naomi comes in to say she and Banks are going to be the next Women’s Tag Team Champions.

We go to the back, where the interviewer says she doesn’t know what Naomi means by that. Madcap Moss and Happy Corbin come in, with Corbin mocking Moss for his big crash landing at Elimination Chamber. Tonight Corbin is going to take Moss’ place against Drew McIntyre and that is no joke.

Drew McIntyre vs. Happy Corbin

Hold on though as Corbin grabs the mic and says this is a Wrestlemania match. Corbin praises Madcap Moss’ toughness after being healthy despite landing so badly at Elimination Chamber. Moss gets on the apron to pose but then Corbin tells him to take this match instead. Corbin and Moss jump McIntyre before the bell and we’re ready to go anyway.

Drew McIntyre vs. Madcap Moss

Moss jumps him in the corner but gets Glasgow Kissed out of the corner. The reverse Alabama Slam is loaded up but Moss bails to the floor instead as we take a break. Back with Moss hitting a running shoulder for two but McIntyre is right back up with the snap belly to belly. The Claymore is loaded up so Corbin offers a distraction, allowing Moss to send McIntyre into the post. A DDT gets two but McIntyre pops back up to hit the Claymore for the pin at 7:21.

Rating: C-. Most years I get excited about Wrestlemania because it is the biggest wrestling event of the year and it feels special. This year I’m excited about Wrestlemania because, at least hopefully, it means that McIntyre vs. Corbin/Moss can be over already. I’m not sure who thought this feud needed to go on for three months, but WWE has some weird ideas.

We look back at Rousey getting attacked earlier tonight.

Rousey promises to take out Sonya Deville next week.

It’s time for the Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar contract signing, with the Usos and Paul Heyman here with Reigns. Before Lesnar shows up, Heyman talks about how this will be the biggest Wrestlemania match in history. It’s bigger than Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant and bigger than Steve Austin vs. the Rock. It’s even bigger than Heyman breaking the Undertaker’s Streak, though he’ll still give Lesnar half credit.

Heyman talks about how Reigns is going to become the unified champion at Wrestlemania and that is what we call a cliffhanger. After a sudden break (nice one from Heyman), here is Lesnar to join things. Lesnar handles his own introductions and says that he isn’t scared of the security that is in the ring. The only things stopping Lesnar from jumping the table right now is this contract.

Lesnar signs, so Heyman says the match isn’t going to be a unification match. Heyman promises that Lesnar is going to lose the title in Madison Square Garden next Saturday. Reigns signs too and then says that the WWE Title is his too. It’s not even Lesnar’s fault because this is Reigns’ show and ring. It’s his camerman and his people because they acknowledge him. These commentators are his because they praise him. Everyone works for him, including the security. The fight is on with Lesnar wrecking the guard, including throwing a char at one of them. Reigns looks nervous to end the show.

Reigns starting to get worried about what he is facing at Wrestlemania is a good adjustment but dang it’s hard to care about this match again. I know it’s the best way to go and pretty much the only thing that they have for Reigns, but how many times do we need to see these two fight?

Overall Rating: C-. The biggest problem with this show is that it is building towards a Wrestlemania that does not look great. So far, with about five weeks to go, we have four matches set up, one of which involves Logan Paul and another which is likely to involve Johnny Knoxville. Reigns vs. Lesnar looms over everything else and it makes this rapid fire build feel so unimportant. This week’s show was another pretty run of the mill edition, with wrestling that wasn’t all that great and some stuff being built to Wrestlemania, but egads they don’t have much interesting going on at the moment and it is hurting badly.

Results
New Day b. Los Lotharios – Midnight Hour to Angel
Xia Li b. Natalya – Spinwheel kick
Sasha Banks b. Shotzi – Bank Statement
Drew McIntyre b. Madcap Moss – Claymore

 

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: February 18, 2022
Location: Smoothie King Center, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: Corey Graves, Michael Cole

We’re taped this week as the roster is in Saudi Arabia for this weekend’s Elimination Chamber. That can make for some interesting shows as the crowd might have to be brought into things a bit more. It’s also the go home show for Elimination Chamber, meaning we are probably in for a lot of hype. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Adam Pearce is in the ring for a contract signing for Charlotte/Sonya Deville vs. Ronda Rousey/Naomi. Everyone comes to the ring and Sonya says she knows how to do this. They immediately start arguing and yelling over each other, because that’s how women interact in WWE. Sonya and Charlotte both sign but Naomi threatens to turn the table over if they don’t stop stalling.

Hold on though because Sonya has a stipulation. A few days ago, Rousey said that she could beat Sonya with one arm tied behind her back, so that’s what she is going to have to do. Ronda is down with that and signs, as does Naomi, and the fight is on. Charlotte has a contract thrown at her and Sonya getting kicked in the head, sending them running off. They kept this short and that might be a good thing.

Sheamus isn’t happy with Ridge Holland losing to Ricochet and wonders if Holland is getting any of this. Tonight, Sheamus will lead by example.

Sheamus vs. Ricochet

Ridge Holland is here with Sheamus. Ricochet starts fast and strikes away before sending Sheamus outside. That means a running flip dive through the ropes but Sheamus is back with a knee choke in the corner. A suplex drops Ricochet and we hit the chinlock. Ricochet fights up and takes it to the floor, only to be fall away slammed over the announcers’ table.

We take a break and come back with Sheamus pounding away until Ricochet manages a tornado DDT. The standing shooting star press sets up a non-running Lionsault for two and Ricochet is getting frustrated. Sheamus grabs an Alabama Slam and goes up top, only to get caught with a super Spanish Fly for a close two. Holland tries a distraction but Ricochet is waiting on him, meaning Sheamus’ surprise Brogue Kick misses. The Recoil gives Ricochet the pin at 10:54.

Rating: B-. That is almost a relief to see as Ricochet gets a win without any major shenanigans. This felt like it actually meant something and that is a lot more than I would have expected. I have no reason to believe that this is Ricochet turning the corner, but at least he won a single match and that is great to see.

Post match Sheamus yells at Holland and shoves him down.

We look back at Rick Boogs “accidentally” getting electrocuted last week on InZayn.

Sami Zayn takes no responsibility for what happened to Boogs last week. Zayn talks about what has happened to him over the last year as we recap the entire conspiracy. Tonight, he makes up for it by getting the Intercontinental Title back.

The Undertaker is going into the Hall of Fame. Well that was expected.

Long Undertaker Hall of Fame video, set to Sad But True by Metallica and American Bad*** by Kid Rock. This of course features all kinds of classic clips and almost every major star talking about what a legend Undertaker is.

Long video on Roman Reigns vs. Goldberg for Reigns’ Universal Title at Elimination Chamber.

Jey Uso vs. Ivar

Jimmy Uso and Erik are here too. Ivar goes with the power to put Jey up against the ropes to start but a superkick cuts that off. The chinlock goes on but Ivar fights up without much effort. The Bronco Buster in the corner sets up a top rope splash to crush Jey, which draws in Jimmy for the DQ at 2:37.

Post match the Raiders clear the ring and get their headgear back.

We look back at Drew McIntyre telling Madcap Moss that their Elimination Chamber match will be falls count anywhere. Moss looks scared, which is usually the case when a big sword is involved.

Here is Drew McIntyre for a chat. He talks about how he used to live near New Orleans and found out that the only people who can drink with the Scots are people from around here. McIntyre has spent a lot of great time around here, but now he is getting ready to go face Madcap Moss in Saudi Arabia.

Since the match is anything goes, McIntyre can do anything from hitting him in the face, sending him into electrical equipment or drowning him in the Red Sea. McIntyre even asks fans to send him ideas on what to do to Moss because he has a 20 hour flight. Cue Moss and Happy Corbin, with Moss promising to laugh all the way home. They make fun of McIntyre’s neck but he promises to make the laughter die at Elimination Chamber. That hashtag idea is smart, as it’s always a good idea to engage the audience in some way.

Shinsuke Nakamura wants to kick Sami Zayn in the face.

Intercontinental Title: Sami Zayn vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura is defending and they take turns driving each other into the corner to start. Sami gets in a shot to the ribs but Nakamura fights back with kicks and knees. Another knee has Zayn down but the knee from the apron only hits floor to put Nakamura in trouble. We take a break and come back with Zayn grabbing a chinlock. Nakamura fights up so Zayn mocks the NAKAMURA chants and hits a clothesline for two.

Another chinlock doesn’t work either, as Nakamura gets out and hits the sliding German suplex for two of his own. Sami is right back with a Michinoku Driver (which dropped Nakamura on his head) for two more and they head outside. Nakamura kicks a diving Sami out of the air but his running knee hits the steps.

We take another break and come back again with Zayn working on the leg. Nakamura fights back but gets his leg kicked out again, setting up the Blue Thunder Bomb to give Zayn two more. Zayn pounds away in the corner and mocks Nakamura’s COME ON but the kick in the corner is blocks. That means Nakamura can kick him in the head and again against the ropes (in a callback to their classic Takeover Dallas match). Kinshasa is loaded up so Sami rolls outside to avoid being kneed in the face. Sami trips him down and rams the leg into the post, setting up a hard kick to the knee for the pin and the title at 18:12.

Rating: B. This was a long match with Zayn getting smart by taking away Nakamura’s greatest weapon. That made for a good story throughout as Nakamura couldn’t strike away at Zayn, who hung in there long enough to beat him. They had to change the title here as Nakamura had held the thing for six months without doing much of anything with it. Zayn has his conspiracy theory deal and this is as good of a payoff as there was for the whole thing.

Booker T. met with some children at a community center in Dallas as part of Black History Month.

Aliyah is very proud of Ricochet for being Sheamus. Ricochet is so excited by his win that he almost sounds like a human being. With Ricochet gone, Sami Zayn comes in to brag about his own big win.

Video on the men’s Elimination Chamber match.

Here are Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman for the big final showdown with Goldberg. Reigns tells New Orleans to acknowledge him and tells Heyman to celebrate him. Heyman says this is the best part of his day because standing next to greatness is spiritually orgasmic. He talks about how you might not have gotten to see some greatness in person, including Drew Brees….who meant nothing because he played for the New Orleans Saints.

That means a WHO DAT (Saints chant) chant, which doesn’t please Heyman that much. Heyman: “The eleventh commandment on the Island of Relevancy: thou shalt not interrupt the Wise Man’s promo.” Heyman promises Reigns will keep the title tomorrow but here is Goldberg to interrupt. Goldberg picks up a mic and then drops it, leaving Reigns to say he was going to give Goldberg one last chance to acknowledge him. That doesn’t seem likely as Goldberg gets in Reigns’ face and says Reigns isn’t next. When it comes to the Universal Title, Goldberg is next. Staring ends the show. Whatever gets Goldberg out of here the fastest.

Overall Rating: C+. You had two matches of note and both of them were quite good, but the st of the show was lacking to say the least. Now in this case, that is a lot more acceptable for two reasons. Not only was this the go home show with the final push towards Elimination Chamber, but it was also the second two hour show in front of this same crowd. What we got was good, but you could tell they were clipping a lot of corners to keep the crowd from getting totally burned out.

Results
Ricochet b. Sheamus – Recoil
Ivar b. Jey Uso via DQ when Jimmy Uso interfered
Sami Zayn b. Shinsuke Nakamura – Kick to the knee

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: February 4, 2022
Location: Paycom Center, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

We’re done with the Royal Rumble and it’s time to get going on the Road to Wrestlemania. That is going to get going on this show with a pair of big talking points. First up, Paul Heyman will be explaining why he sided with Roman Reigns and Ronda Rousey might be announcing her Wrestlemania opponent. Let’s get to it.

Here is the Royal Rumble if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Brock Lesnar getting screwed out of the WWE Title at the Royal Rumble but then coming back to win the Royal Rumble later in the night. Then he announced that he will be challenging Roman Reigns for the Universal Title at Wrestlemania.

Here is the Bloodline to get things going, complete with a look at Reigns retaining the Universal Title over Seth Rollins at the Royal Rumble. Paul Heyman talks about how there was no plot or plan, because he made a huge mistake by telling Reigns what he thought. He felt that Reigns needed to be protected and he made a mistake. The Coronavirus picked the wrong human to infect and Heyman got Lesnar the WWE Title match. It would leave everyone where they needed to be…except for Heyman when it comes to Reigns.

On Lesnar’s first night as champion, he came to Smackdown and challenged Reigns to a title for title match at Wrestlemania. Heyman says Lesnar was as stupid as he looked because he was stuck with a happy Saskatchewan farmer who wants to take everyone to Suplex City. Then we got to the Royal Rumble, where the Goat slayed the Beast to save Heyman from having to say the same things over and over.

Heyman starts saying the catchphrase but says you will never hear it again. He now realizes the truth: Lesnar needs to be protected from Reigns. Then Reigns offered him the hand of the Bloodline, which is why Heyman handed over the title to smash Lesnar in the face with it. Now there will be no title for title match because Lesnar will acknowledge Roman Reigns, which Heyman demonstrates.

Heyman tells the fans to acknowledge the Tribal Chief…..and it’s Goldberg time. Goldberg comes to the ring and gets straight to the point with the challenge for Elimination Chamber. For the love of all things good and holy, PLEASE DO THE MATCH ALREADY! WWE has been threatening us with this stupid match for two years now so let them do it already and get it out of their system.

Ridge Holland vs. Ricochet

Sheamus and Cesaro are here too. Holland shoulders him down to start but Ricochet flips over him. Another dodge sends Holland outside but he avoids a charge and drops Ricochet face first onto the apron. Holland stops to say something to Sheamus though and it’s a Codebreaker to give Ricochet the pin at 1:50.

Cesaro/Ricochet vs. Ridge Holland/Sheamus

Joined in progress after a break (thankfully without needing to show someone coming out and making the match) with Sheamus hitting the forearms to Cesaro’s chest and then clotheslining him back in. Pat McAfee is holding the Shillelagh as Cesaro fights out of a chinlock and hands it back to Ricochet to pick up the pace.

A springboard forearm sets up a Lionsault for two as everything breaks down. Cesaro rolls Sheamus up for two but charges into a boot in the corner. A dropkick catches Sheamus with a dropkick on top but Holland tags himself in as Sheamus gets superplexed. Northern Grit finishes Cesaro at 2:54 to get his heat back after all of five minutes later.

Jimmy Uso vs. Erik

Preview of the Tag Team Title match at Elimination Chamber because this is how WWE hypes up tag team matches. Erik slips out of a fireman’s carry to start and blasts Jimmy with a knee to the face. Ivar and Jey get into it on the floor, leaving Jimmy to superkick Erik down. The Superfly Splash (with the We The Ones pose in the air) finishes for Jimmy at 1:14 to continue the fast matches and weird booking choices.

We look at Aliyah beating Natalya in three seconds a few weeks ago. Then Natalya beat her up for a DQ in a rematch.

Aliyah vs. Natalya

Aliyah brags about the 3:17 record winning time but gets picked up without much effort. Back up and Aliyah gets in a takedown for some right hands of her own. A Rey Mysterio sitout bulldog gets two, meaning it’s a shocked near fall face. Natalya hits the discus lariat and they head outside. This time Natalya beats her down for a good while, only to get sent into the barricade to give Aliyah the countout win at 2:22.

Here is the returning Drew McIntyre to say he is back. Before he can get very far, here is Happy Corbin for a distraction, but McIntyre pulls the sword out to stop a charging Madcap Moss. McIntyre wants to hear a funny joke about himself, with Moss saying that Wrestlemania is like a criminal who beats the charges: they both get off Scot-free. That earns him a Claymore (McIntyre: “Idiot.”) and McIntyre promises to make Corbin’s life h***.

Sami Zayn crashed the Jackass Forever premiere and got taken out by security. Johnny Knoxville even stabs him with an electric stick.

Zayn complains to Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville about letting that air on television. To calm him down, he gets his Intercontinental Title match in two weeks. Pearce: “Should we invite Johnny Knoxville?” Zayn leaves and it’s Natalya coming in, saying she wants Aliyah next week, pinfall or submission only, Dungeon Style. Deal.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal

Championship Contenders match and Rick Boogs’ guitar doesn’t work so McAfee dances to the entrance music instead. Boogs and Shanky are here too and here is Sami Zayn to join commentary. Nakamura starts fast with the sliding German suplex but Kinshasa is countered into a fireman’s carry gutbuster for two. Mahal punches him down and we hit the chinlock. The Khallas is broken up and Nakamura kicks him in the face. Kinshasa finishes for Nakamura at 3:14.

Rating: C-. At least they seem to have dropped the idea of Mahal as a thing, which is good news for everyone. Zayn has a good chance of winning the title in two weeks, which will end one of the most under the radar six months reigns since Nakamura’s last under the radar six months reigns. This was your usually dull Mahal match, but that shouldn’t be a surprise these days.

We look at Sonya Deville eliminating Naomi from the Royal Rumble.

Naomi wants Sonya to face her in the ring in five minutes. Sonya says she’s busy so Naomi wants to do it next week. That won’t work either, because Naomi is getting a Smackdown Women’s Title match next week. Naomi doesn’t buy it but Adam Pearce says it’s for real.

Video on Goldberg.

Natalya goes to explain what Dungeon Style means to the bosses (which she couldn’t do when she was in the room with them earlier). Xia Li walks out of the office instead though and Natalya decides to do this later.

New Day vs. Los Lotharios

This is the result of New Day interrupting Los Lotharios’ Valentine’s Day photo shoot. Kofi sends Humberto into the corner to start and rolls him up for two. An Angel distraction lets Humberto get in a cheap shot from behind though and everything breaks down. Kofi gets kicked down and we take a break.

Back with Garza TAKING OFF HIS PANTS and kicking Kingston in the ribs. Angel gets two off a belly to back suplex but Kofi kicks a moonsault out of the air. The hot tag brings in Big E. to clean house, setting up a wheelbarrow suplex into a top rope bulldog from Kofi….for two as Humberto makes the save. Big E. misses the spear to the floor and gets moonsaulted from the top, setting up a Doomsday dropkick for two on Kofi. The Wing Clipper is broken up and it’s back to Big E. for the Midnight Hour and the pin at 9:43.

Rating: B-. This was a weird one as they did a big false finish which seemed to confuse commentary as well. If nothing else, it’s weird to debut a big move like that and then have it get two, but it was indeed a surprise twist. That being said, it would be nice if WWE did something new with New Day, as you can almost feel the Usos showdown coming.

Here are Charlotte and Sonya Deville for the Ronda Rousey Wrestlemania announcement. Deville says Rousey has picked Becky Lynch for Wrestlemania so Charlotte gets to pick her opponent. Charlotte mocks the idea of facing Ronda, who hasn’t done anything since she lost the title. So pick anyone for Wrestlemania because it doesn’t matter. She’ll pick Sasha Banks, who isn’t even here tonight.

Charlotte wishes Banks was here tonight because Wrestlemania will be the best and worst day of her life. She can come sign the contract….and here is Rousey to interrupt. Rousey won the Rumble and says she gets to pick who she faces at Wrestlemania. She didn’t fly into an ice storm with her baby for a chat though and now Charlotte gets to learn the family business of a beating.

Charlotte isn’t special, but she is first. Rousey will see her at Wrestlemania, so the match is on. Charlotte says the title is her baby and prettier than Rousey’s. The jacket comes off so Sonya tries to break it up and gets caught in the piper’s Pit. Rousey snaps the arm for a bonus. So the Becky vs. Rousey thing was a lie and Charlotte vs. Banks isn’t happening? Why bother mentioning them in the first place then?

Overall Rating: C-. The short wrestling was a bit weird this week but they are clearly starting to move towards Wrestlemania. Elimination Chamber still needs to get done as well though, and that makes for a bit of a weird schedule. I’m rather glad that they’re getting Goldberg vs. Reigns out of the way already, but it could make for a long two weeks on the way there. The rest of the show wasn’t great with very little in the way of quality wrestling, but now we should be cranking it up in the coming weeks.

Results
Ricochet b. Ridge Holland – Codebreaker
Ridge Holland/Sheamus b. Cesaro/Ricochet – Northern Grit to Cesaro
Jimmy Uso b. Erik – Superfly Splash
Aliyah b. Natalya via countout
Shinsuke Nakamura b. Jinder Mahal – Kinshasa
New Day b. Los Lotharios – Midnight Hour to Angel

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: January 28, 2022
Location: T-Mobile Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

It’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble and that means it is probably time for the fabled face to face showdown. In this case, that likely means Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins, who just don’t have that much history together. Other than that, we are likely going to get the final push towards tomorrow night. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Charlotte to get things going. She promises to do what Patrick Mahomes and the Chiefs will never do: bring a championship to Kansas City! Charlotte promises to win the Royal Rumble on Saturday, where there will be returns and betrayals. There are going to be people fighting and clawing to go to Wrestlemania. Cue Shayna Baszler to interrupt, saying that this is her language. Baszler is going to win, but here is Aliyah to brag about her world record. She is feeling confident, but here is Natalya to interrupt, calling Aliyah delusional and lucky.

Now it’s Shotzi coming in to say she might be able to sneak in and steal the win. Charlotte doesn’t want to hear about this but here is Sasha Banks interrupt. Banks slaps Charlotte in the face and the brawl is on, with Charlotte and Banks being the only two left standing. Banks tosses Charlotte and stands tall, because of course it winds up being two of the Horsewomen.

Ridge Holland is glad to be back and Sheamus knows Holland is just like him. Sheamus even gives Holland his old face guard.

Sheamus/Ridge Holland vs. Cesaro/Ricochet

Sheamus headlocks Cesaro down to start but gets broken up in a hurry. Cesaro sends him outside for a breather but Sheamus walks into a hard clothesline back inside. There’s a double stomp to the ribs and it’s off to Ricochet to work on the arm. Holland comes in and gets knocked all of the place, including a springboard dropkick to the floor. A big flip dive barely connects with Holland (who seemed to be too far off) and we take a break.

Back with Sheamus hitting the Irish Curse on Ricochet and Holland slamming him down. A nasty over the shoulder backbreaker has Ricochet in trouble until he fights out, setting up a springboard moonsault. The double tag brings in Cesaro to beat on Sheamus, including the running uppercut against the barricade on the floor. Back in and Cesaro flips out of an Irish Curse and grabs a small package for two. Ricochet springboards in to dropkick Holland down, allowing Cesaro to hit that modified Angle Slam for two. Holland is back in though and it’s a mask shot to Cesaro. Northern Grit finishes Cesaro at 10:41.

Rating: C+. Well, it was nice to see Ricochet not take a pin for a change and Holland gets a win to move him a bit forward. You can only get him so far with Sheamus getting so many of the falls so this is a nice little boost for Holland. Pretty good match here, with Ricochet getting in his impressive looking high flying, which is almost always the case.

Rumble By The Numbers video.

Naomi vs. Sonya Deville

In the back Sonya tries to influence the referee, who says he’ll be calling this down the line. Feeling out process to start until Sonya knocks her into the ropes for a forearm to the jaw. Sonya hammers away on the mat but Naomi is back with a dropkick hard to the face. That’s broken up as Sonya pulls her to the floor and hits a Nightmare on Helm Street onto the floor as we take a break.

Back with Sonya hitting a spinebuster out of the corner for two, earning the referee a stern lecture. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Naomi is back up with some kicks to the face. A bulldog into the middle buckle sets up a high crossbody (onto Sonya’s face) for two but another one is countered into a shove into the corner. Something like a suplex into a Rock Bottom (basically Matt Morgan’s old Hellevator) gets two on Naomi but she’s back with a Bubba Bomb. The Rear View into the split legged moonsault finishes Deville at 11:39.

Rating: C. It was a good enough match, though I’m not sure if it was quite the huge moment that commentary was selling it as being. Deville is pretty awesome as the evil boss, though I’m not sure where this leaves her going forward. At the same time, is Naomi beating a woman who has barely wrestled in about a year and a half all that impressive? That being said, Naomi getting a win of some kind is a great thing to see after all this time.

Post match Naomi is very happy with her win and promises to win the Rumble. Deville comes back out with the jacket on and enters the match as well.

The Usos don’t like the Viking Raiders, who threaten them with hatchets.

Here is Sami Zayn, who has made some adjustments to In-Zayn. Now it is a talk show (er, live podcast), with Jinder Mahal and Shanky as the first guests. First though, Sami wants to talk about Johnny Knoxville, even though Mahal and Shanky are ready to face Shinsuke Nakamura and Rick Boogs. Zayn keeps going about Knoxville and Jackass, which Mahal says are huge in India. Cue Rick Boogs with his guitar to interrupt, with Shinsuke Nakamura coming in to kick Sami in the head.

Shinsuke Nakamura/Rick Boogs vs. Shanky/Jinder Mahal

Joined in progress with Shanky beating on Boogs, who fights up and hits a rather impressive delayed suplex. Back up and Boogs shrugs off some shots in the corner, meaning the comeback is on. Some running shoulders don’t put Shanky down so it’s a running ax handle to finally take him down. The Boogs Cruise finishes Shanky at 2:59.

Kofi Kingston is glad to have Big E. back and they are ready to win the Royal Rumble, because if one of them wins, all of them win.

Madcap Moss/Happy Corbin vs. New Day

Before the match, we get a look at Moss and Corbin injuring Drew McIntyre, which they find rather amusing. Big E. runs Moss over to start and it’s a jumping (over Big E.) backsplash to give Kofi two. Corbin comes in for a running corner clothesline but gets sent outside. That means Kofi can try a dive, only to get pulled out of the air for a rather hard posting as we take a break.

Back with Kofi sliding between Corbin’s legs for the tag off to Big E. Suplexes abound until it’s already back to Kingston, who gets caught in Deep Six. Kofi is able to get back over to the corner though and the hot tag brings in Big E. With Corbin knocked down, the Midnight Hour finishes Moss at 7:02.

Rating: C+. There is always something fun about watching New Day team up and they made it work here again. What matters is that they know how to work well together and they shut up Moss and Corbin for one night. Big E. might be a dark horse for the Royal Rumble and both of them looked good in their warmup here.

Royal Rumble rundown.

Here are Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins for their big showdown. Reigns talks about dishonoring the family, but Rollins points out that Reigns losing to Brock Lesnar must have been a big disappointment. Reigns laughs off talking about the past, but Rollins brings up some of their moments, including Reigns’ thirty day suspension. Finally he gets to splitting up the Shield, which seems to get to Reigns. Rollins says Reigns has done everything, except beat him one on one.

Reigns doesn’t like what Rollins did, and he has moved on, but he will always hate Rollins for what he did to the Shield. This sends Rollins into a rant about how everyone in the family is a joke and tomorrow, it all goes up in smoke. That gets Reigns fired up and he shoves Rollins, only to miss the Superman Punch to end the show. The story was already set and this was just the final showdown before the fight.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was a bit more about the Royal Rumbles themselves and that is a smart way to go. The rest of the card is set so why bother focusing on the rest all that much? I want to see what they have going on in the matches and now we should have a great start to the Road to Wrestlemania. The wrestling was just ok for the most part, but that was not the focal point this week, which is ok with such a big night coming.

Results
Sheamus/Ridge Holland b. Cesaro/Ricochet – Northern Grit to Cesaro
Shinsuke Nakamura/Rock Boogs b. Shanky/Jinder Mahal – Boogs Cruise to Shanky
Naomi b. Sonya Deville – Split legged moonsault
New Day b. Madcap Moss/Happy Corbin – Midnight Hour to Moss

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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