Smackdown – February 4, 2022: The Long And Winding Road

Smackdown
Date: February 4, 2022
Location: Paycom Center, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

We’re done with the Royal Rumble and it’s time to get going on the Road to Wrestlemania. That is going to get going on this show with a pair of big talking points. First up, Paul Heyman will be explaining why he sided with Roman Reigns and Ronda Rousey might be announcing her Wrestlemania opponent. Let’s get to it.

Here is the Royal Rumble if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Brock Lesnar getting screwed out of the WWE Title at the Royal Rumble but then coming back to win the Royal Rumble later in the night. Then he announced that he will be challenging Roman Reigns for the Universal Title at Wrestlemania.

Here is the Bloodline to get things going, complete with a look at Reigns retaining the Universal Title over Seth Rollins at the Royal Rumble. Paul Heyman talks about how there was no plot or plan, because he made a huge mistake by telling Reigns what he thought. He felt that Reigns needed to be protected and he made a mistake. The Coronavirus picked the wrong human to infect and Heyman got Lesnar the WWE Title match. It would leave everyone where they needed to be…except for Heyman when it comes to Reigns.

On Lesnar’s first night as champion, he came to Smackdown and challenged Reigns to a title for title match at Wrestlemania. Heyman says Lesnar was as stupid as he looked because he was stuck with a happy Saskatchewan farmer who wants to take everyone to Suplex City. Then we got to the Royal Rumble, where the Goat slayed the Beast to save Heyman from having to say the same things over and over.

Heyman starts saying the catchphrase but says you will never hear it again. He now realizes the truth: Lesnar needs to be protected from Reigns. Then Reigns offered him the hand of the Bloodline, which is why Heyman handed over the title to smash Lesnar in the face with it. Now there will be no title for title match because Lesnar will acknowledge Roman Reigns, which Heyman demonstrates.

Heyman tells the fans to acknowledge the Tribal Chief…..and it’s Goldberg time. Goldberg comes to the ring and gets straight to the point with the challenge for Elimination Chamber. For the love of all things good and holy, PLEASE DO THE MATCH ALREADY! WWE has been threatening us with this stupid match for two years now so let them do it already and get it out of their system.

Ridge Holland vs. Ricochet

Sheamus and Cesaro are here too. Holland shoulders him down to start but Ricochet flips over him. Another dodge sends Holland outside but he avoids a charge and drops Ricochet face first onto the apron. Holland stops to say something to Sheamus though and it’s a Codebreaker to give Ricochet the pin at 1:50.

Cesaro/Ricochet vs. Ridge Holland/Sheamus

Joined in progress after a break (thankfully without needing to show someone coming out and making the match) with Sheamus hitting the forearms to Cesaro’s chest and then clotheslining him back in. Pat McAfee is holding the Shillelagh as Cesaro fights out of a chinlock and hands it back to Ricochet to pick up the pace.

A springboard forearm sets up a Lionsault for two as everything breaks down. Cesaro rolls Sheamus up for two but charges into a boot in the corner. A dropkick catches Sheamus with a dropkick on top but Holland tags himself in as Sheamus gets superplexed. Northern Grit finishes Cesaro at 2:54 to get his heat back after all of five minutes later.

Jimmy Uso vs. Erik

Preview of the Tag Team Title match at Elimination Chamber because this is how WWE hypes up tag team matches. Erik slips out of a fireman’s carry to start and blasts Jimmy with a knee to the face. Ivar and Jey get into it on the floor, leaving Jimmy to superkick Erik down. The Superfly Splash (with the We The Ones pose in the air) finishes for Jimmy at 1:14 to continue the fast matches and weird booking choices.

We look at Aliyah beating Natalya in three seconds a few weeks ago. Then Natalya beat her up for a DQ in a rematch.

Aliyah vs. Natalya

Aliyah brags about the 3:17 record winning time but gets picked up without much effort. Back up and Aliyah gets in a takedown for some right hands of her own. A Rey Mysterio sitout bulldog gets two, meaning it’s a shocked near fall face. Natalya hits the discus lariat and they head outside. This time Natalya beats her down for a good while, only to get sent into the barricade to give Aliyah the countout win at 2:22.

Here is the returning Drew McIntyre to say he is back. Before he can get very far, here is Happy Corbin for a distraction, but McIntyre pulls the sword out to stop a charging Madcap Moss. McIntyre wants to hear a funny joke about himself, with Moss saying that Wrestlemania is like a criminal who beats the charges: they both get off Scot-free. That earns him a Claymore (McIntyre: “Idiot.”) and McIntyre promises to make Corbin’s life h***.

Sami Zayn crashed the Jackass Forever premiere and got taken out by security. Johnny Knoxville even stabs him with an electric stick.

Zayn complains to Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville about letting that air on television. To calm him down, he gets his Intercontinental Title match in two weeks. Pearce: “Should we invite Johnny Knoxville?” Zayn leaves and it’s Natalya coming in, saying she wants Aliyah next week, pinfall or submission only, Dungeon Style. Deal.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal

Championship Contenders match and Rick Boogs’ guitar doesn’t work so McAfee dances to the entrance music instead. Boogs and Shanky are here too and here is Sami Zayn to join commentary. Nakamura starts fast with the sliding German suplex but Kinshasa is countered into a fireman’s carry gutbuster for two. Mahal punches him down and we hit the chinlock. The Khallas is broken up and Nakamura kicks him in the face. Kinshasa finishes for Nakamura at 3:14.

Rating: C-. At least they seem to have dropped the idea of Mahal as a thing, which is good news for everyone. Zayn has a good chance of winning the title in two weeks, which will end one of the most under the radar six months reigns since Nakamura’s last under the radar six months reigns. This was your usually dull Mahal match, but that shouldn’t be a surprise these days.

We look at Sonya Deville eliminating Naomi from the Royal Rumble.

Naomi wants Sonya to face her in the ring in five minutes. Sonya says she’s busy so Naomi wants to do it next week. That won’t work either, because Naomi is getting a Smackdown Women’s Title match next week. Naomi doesn’t buy it but Adam Pearce says it’s for real.

Video on Goldberg.

Natalya goes to explain what Dungeon Style means to the bosses (which she couldn’t do when she was in the room with them earlier). Xia Li walks out of the office instead though and Natalya decides to do this later.

New Day vs. Los Lotharios

This is the result of New Day interrupting Los Lotharios’ Valentine’s Day photo shoot. Kofi sends Humberto into the corner to start and rolls him up for two. An Angel distraction lets Humberto get in a cheap shot from behind though and everything breaks down. Kofi gets kicked down and we take a break.

Back with Garza TAKING OFF HIS PANTS and kicking Kingston in the ribs. Angel gets two off a belly to back suplex but Kofi kicks a moonsault out of the air. The hot tag brings in Big E. to clean house, setting up a wheelbarrow suplex into a top rope bulldog from Kofi….for two as Humberto makes the save. Big E. misses the spear to the floor and gets moonsaulted from the top, setting up a Doomsday dropkick for two on Kofi. The Wing Clipper is broken up and it’s back to Big E. for the Midnight Hour and the pin at 9:43.

Rating: B-. This was a weird one as they did a big false finish which seemed to confuse commentary as well. If nothing else, it’s weird to debut a big move like that and then have it get two, but it was indeed a surprise twist. That being said, it would be nice if WWE did something new with New Day, as you can almost feel the Usos showdown coming.

Here are Charlotte and Sonya Deville for the Ronda Rousey Wrestlemania announcement. Deville says Rousey has picked Becky Lynch for Wrestlemania so Charlotte gets to pick her opponent. Charlotte mocks the idea of facing Ronda, who hasn’t done anything since she lost the title. So pick anyone for Wrestlemania because it doesn’t matter. She’ll pick Sasha Banks, who isn’t even here tonight.

Charlotte wishes Banks was here tonight because Wrestlemania will be the best and worst day of her life. She can come sign the contract….and here is Rousey to interrupt. Rousey won the Rumble and says she gets to pick who she faces at Wrestlemania. She didn’t fly into an ice storm with her baby for a chat though and now Charlotte gets to learn the family business of a beating.

Charlotte isn’t special, but she is first. Rousey will see her at Wrestlemania, so the match is on. Charlotte says the title is her baby and prettier than Rousey’s. The jacket comes off so Sonya tries to break it up and gets caught in the piper’s Pit. Rousey snaps the arm for a bonus. So the Becky vs. Rousey thing was a lie and Charlotte vs. Banks isn’t happening? Why bother mentioning them in the first place then?

Overall Rating: C-. The short wrestling was a bit weird this week but they are clearly starting to move towards Wrestlemania. Elimination Chamber still needs to get done as well though, and that makes for a bit of a weird schedule. I’m rather glad that they’re getting Goldberg vs. Reigns out of the way already, but it could make for a long two weeks on the way there. The rest of the show wasn’t great with very little in the way of quality wrestling, but now we should be cranking it up in the coming weeks.

Results
Ricochet b. Ridge Holland – Codebreaker
Ridge Holland/Sheamus b. Cesaro/Ricochet – Northern Grit to Cesaro
Jimmy Uso b. Erik – Superfly Splash
Aliyah b. Natalya via countout
Shinsuke Nakamura b. Jinder Mahal – Kinshasa
New Day b. Los Lotharios – Midnight Hour to Angel

 

 

 

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Smackdown – January 28, 2022: That Last Push

Smackdown
Date: January 28, 2022
Location: T-Mobile Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

It’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble and that means it is probably time for the fabled face to face showdown. In this case, that likely means Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins, who just don’t have that much history together. Other than that, we are likely going to get the final push towards tomorrow night. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Charlotte to get things going. She promises to do what Patrick Mahomes and the Chiefs will never do: bring a championship to Kansas City! Charlotte promises to win the Royal Rumble on Saturday, where there will be returns and betrayals. There are going to be people fighting and clawing to go to Wrestlemania. Cue Shayna Baszler to interrupt, saying that this is her language. Baszler is going to win, but here is Aliyah to brag about her world record. She is feeling confident, but here is Natalya to interrupt, calling Aliyah delusional and lucky.

Now it’s Shotzi coming in to say she might be able to sneak in and steal the win. Charlotte doesn’t want to hear about this but here is Sasha Banks interrupt. Banks slaps Charlotte in the face and the brawl is on, with Charlotte and Banks being the only two left standing. Banks tosses Charlotte and stands tall, because of course it winds up being two of the Horsewomen.

Ridge Holland is glad to be back and Sheamus knows Holland is just like him. Sheamus even gives Holland his old face guard.

Sheamus/Ridge Holland vs. Cesaro/Ricochet

Sheamus headlocks Cesaro down to start but gets broken up in a hurry. Cesaro sends him outside for a breather but Sheamus walks into a hard clothesline back inside. There’s a double stomp to the ribs and it’s off to Ricochet to work on the arm. Holland comes in and gets knocked all of the place, including a springboard dropkick to the floor. A big flip dive barely connects with Holland (who seemed to be too far off) and we take a break.

Back with Sheamus hitting the Irish Curse on Ricochet and Holland slamming him down. A nasty over the shoulder backbreaker has Ricochet in trouble until he fights out, setting up a springboard moonsault. The double tag brings in Cesaro to beat on Sheamus, including the running uppercut against the barricade on the floor. Back in and Cesaro flips out of an Irish Curse and grabs a small package for two. Ricochet springboards in to dropkick Holland down, allowing Cesaro to hit that modified Angle Slam for two. Holland is back in though and it’s a mask shot to Cesaro. Northern Grit finishes Cesaro at 10:41.

Rating: C+. Well, it was nice to see Ricochet not take a pin for a change and Holland gets a win to move him a bit forward. You can only get him so far with Sheamus getting so many of the falls so this is a nice little boost for Holland. Pretty good match here, with Ricochet getting in his impressive looking high flying, which is almost always the case.

Rumble By The Numbers video.

Naomi vs. Sonya Deville

In the back Sonya tries to influence the referee, who says he’ll be calling this down the line. Feeling out process to start until Sonya knocks her into the ropes for a forearm to the jaw. Sonya hammers away on the mat but Naomi is back with a dropkick hard to the face. That’s broken up as Sonya pulls her to the floor and hits a Nightmare on Helm Street onto the floor as we take a break.

Back with Sonya hitting a spinebuster out of the corner for two, earning the referee a stern lecture. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Naomi is back up with some kicks to the face. A bulldog into the middle buckle sets up a high crossbody (onto Sonya’s face) for two but another one is countered into a shove into the corner. Something like a suplex into a Rock Bottom (basically Matt Morgan’s old Hellevator) gets two on Naomi but she’s back with a Bubba Bomb. The Rear View into the split legged moonsault finishes Deville at 11:39.

Rating: C. It was a good enough match, though I’m not sure if it was quite the huge moment that commentary was selling it as being. Deville is pretty awesome as the evil boss, though I’m not sure where this leaves her going forward. At the same time, is Naomi beating a woman who has barely wrestled in about a year and a half all that impressive? That being said, Naomi getting a win of some kind is a great thing to see after all this time.

Post match Naomi is very happy with her win and promises to win the Rumble. Deville comes back out with the jacket on and enters the match as well.

The Usos don’t like the Viking Raiders, who threaten them with hatchets.

Here is Sami Zayn, who has made some adjustments to In-Zayn. Now it is a talk show (er, live podcast), with Jinder Mahal and Shanky as the first guests. First though, Sami wants to talk about Johnny Knoxville, even though Mahal and Shanky are ready to face Shinsuke Nakamura and Rick Boogs. Zayn keeps going about Knoxville and Jackass, which Mahal says are huge in India. Cue Rick Boogs with his guitar to interrupt, with Shinsuke Nakamura coming in to kick Sami in the head.

Shinsuke Nakamura/Rick Boogs vs. Shanky/Jinder Mahal

Joined in progress with Shanky beating on Boogs, who fights up and hits a rather impressive delayed suplex. Back up and Boogs shrugs off some shots in the corner, meaning the comeback is on. Some running shoulders don’t put Shanky down so it’s a running ax handle to finally take him down. The Boogs Cruise finishes Shanky at 2:59.

Kofi Kingston is glad to have Big E. back and they are ready to win the Royal Rumble, because if one of them wins, all of them win.

Madcap Moss/Happy Corbin vs. New Day

Before the match, we get a look at Moss and Corbin injuring Drew McIntyre, which they find rather amusing. Big E. runs Moss over to start and it’s a jumping (over Big E.) backsplash to give Kofi two. Corbin comes in for a running corner clothesline but gets sent outside. That means Kofi can try a dive, only to get pulled out of the air for a rather hard posting as we take a break.

Back with Kofi sliding between Corbin’s legs for the tag off to Big E. Suplexes abound until it’s already back to Kingston, who gets caught in Deep Six. Kofi is able to get back over to the corner though and the hot tag brings in Big E. With Corbin knocked down, the Midnight Hour finishes Moss at 7:02.

Rating: C+. There is always something fun about watching New Day team up and they made it work here again. What matters is that they know how to work well together and they shut up Moss and Corbin for one night. Big E. might be a dark horse for the Royal Rumble and both of them looked good in their warmup here.

Royal Rumble rundown.

Here are Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins for their big showdown. Reigns talks about dishonoring the family, but Rollins points out that Reigns losing to Brock Lesnar must have been a big disappointment. Reigns laughs off talking about the past, but Rollins brings up some of their moments, including Reigns’ thirty day suspension. Finally he gets to splitting up the Shield, which seems to get to Reigns. Rollins says Reigns has done everything, except beat him one on one.

Reigns doesn’t like what Rollins did, and he has moved on, but he will always hate Rollins for what he did to the Shield. This sends Rollins into a rant about how everyone in the family is a joke and tomorrow, it all goes up in smoke. That gets Reigns fired up and he shoves Rollins, only to miss the Superman Punch to end the show. The story was already set and this was just the final showdown before the fight.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was a bit more about the Royal Rumbles themselves and that is a smart way to go. The rest of the card is set so why bother focusing on the rest all that much? I want to see what they have going on in the matches and now we should have a great start to the Road to Wrestlemania. The wrestling was just ok for the most part, but that was not the focal point this week, which is ok with such a big night coming.

Results
Sheamus/Ridge Holland b. Cesaro/Ricochet – Northern Grit to Cesaro
Shinsuke Nakamura/Rock Boogs b. Shanky/Jinder Mahal – Boogs Cruise to Shanky
Naomi b. Sonya Deville – Split legged moonsault
New Day b. Madcap Moss/Happy Corbin – Midnight Hour to Moss

 

 

 

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Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2016 (2017 Redo): One More Time, From The Top

Royal Rumble 2016
Date: January 24, 2016
Location: Amway Center, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 15,170
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

Now this one actually has my interest for a change. A year ago, WWE decided that the right idea was to have WWE World Champion Roman Reigns fight everyone in a single match for the title. This is completely different as now he fights everyone for the US Title. Anyway, the whole thing is about the main event, as it should be, so let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Mark Henry/Jack Swagger vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Darren Young/Damien Sandow vs. Ascension

One fall to a finish and the winners go to the Rumble. I can’t help but call JBL cute for suggesting that any of these four have a chance to win the Rumble. The fans want Sandow and just EXPLODE when he actually gets the tag. The Wind-Up Elbow gets two on Swagger before it’s off to Young so the crowd can die all over again. Konnor tags himself in and it’s a big eight way standoff as we take a break.

Back with Swagger powerslamming Konnor as we hear about the fans wanting some Sandow. D-Von gets crotched against the post so the fans change up to wanting Sexual Chocolate. Henry obliges with a hip swivel, which will probably get him fined for not focusing enough or some jazz like that. A D-VON chant gets him back to his feet because we need a long chinlock in a match that doesn’t break eight minutes and has eight participants. Bubba comes in off the hot tag and cleans house with Young taking Wazzup. 3D gets two on Viktor but Henry steals the pin at 7:58.

Rating: D. This wasn’t great but it did everything it needed to do. At the end of the day, other than MAYBE the Dudleyz, Swagger and Henry were the only pairing that made sense here. Just let us have two former World Champions in there to fill in a few spots. It’s not like anyone wanted to see Young or Ascension (a sign in the crowd called them today’s joke and I can’t say I disagree) in there so go with what makes sense.

Vince and Stephanie McMahon show up in a limo (So they’re good at this point. Got it.) and talk about how awesome tonight is going to be and how fair it is to Reigns. Vince loves the idea, almost as much as he loves himself.

The opening video recaps the only thing that matters here with the tagline of One vs. All. I liked that last year and I still do.

Intercontinental Title: Kevin Owens vs. Dean Ambrose

Ambrose is defending and this is last man standing. They go right after each other to start with Dean hammering away and biting Owens’ head before scoring with the bulldog out of the corner. What looks like a tablet to the head gives Owens a breather and a superkick sets up the Cannonball through the barricade. A few chair shots keep Dean in trouble and Owens has a seat as the champ gets up.

Two chairs are set up in the middle of the ring but, just like putting a chair in the corner, whoever sets them up goes through them, meaning Ambrose backdrops him through the chairs. A suicide dive is countered into a ram into the apron followed by a whip into the steps for about a seven. With Ambrose getting up again, Owens loads up two tables on top of each other but the superplex is blocked, meaning we’ll get back to the big crash later.

Dirty Deeds gets eight on Owens and another one onto a chair sends Owens rolling to the floor to land on his feet at nine. Eh that’s kind of clever. The fans want Owens to fight (multiple times even) but Dean elbows him through a table. That’s still not enough so Dean says he hates Owens. Kevin: “I hate you too!” Back in and Owens’ swinging fisherman’s superplex sends Dean through another table to give Kevin a nine count. Owens lays Dean on a set of chairs but the champ pops up and shoves him through the double tables to retain at 20:50.

Rating: B+. It’s no masterpiece but this is the kind of show that only needs one great match to be a classic, making this a bonus. The big spot at the end was a good choice and I kind of like that over a finisher onto something made of metal. It’s a good match and a good way to open things up since the rest of the card is just a way to get to the main event.

We recap heel New Day (what a weird concept, though they’re rapidly turning face here) vs. the Usos, which has involved Chris Jericho destroying Francesca to freak Woods out.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Usos

New Day is defending (of course) and there’s no Woods. Kofi asks for a moment of silence for Francesca but here’s Woods with a new trombone named Francesca II. See, he’s in mourning but a man has, ahem, needs. This isn’t it for them tonight though as New Day wants the World Title so 2016 can be all gold everything. Kofi: “GOLDEN UNICORNS!” Woods: “Stay golden pony boy.”

The twins take over to start and the fans aren’t all that thrilled. A jawbreaker puts Jimmy down and it’s off to Big E. for some hip swiveling, only to have Jey dropkick him into the barricade. Woods proves his worth to the team by dropping Jey to take over again. Sometimes it’s a bit harder to get rid of those old heel tendencies you see. The fans demand a Francesca performance but Woods plays when he wants to, which isn’t while Kofi has Jey in a chinlock.

The Warrior Splash gives Big E. two as JBL talks about NFL coin flips. A spinning enziguri drops Kofi and there’s the hot tag to Jimmy so house can be cleaned. Normally the fans are a bit more enthusiastic about that but New Day is just WAY too popular here for fans to get behind the Usos.

Everything breaks down and a Whisper in the Wind gets two on Big E. A belly to belly gets the same on Jey but the spear through the ropes is blocked by a raised knee. Why not just step to the side? The second attempt works a bit better but it’s too early for the Midnight Hour. Jey superkicks Kofi into the Superfly Splash for two as a foot goes on the rope. Kofi eats another superkick but a blind tag brings in Big E. for the Big Ending to retain at 10:52.

Rating: B-. This took some time to get rolling but once everything broke down, it was as good as you would expect from these teams. New Day is clearly the future of the division despite being champs for nearly five months at this point. Catching a top rope splash out of the air is really impressive as the champs continue to show that they have the ring work to back up their charisma.

We look back at Brock Lesnar beating up the League of Nations, followed by Reigns spearing Brock. The Wyatts then beat Reigns and Brock up to make themselves a threat for later tonight.

The Wyatts say they’ll win the title for Bray tonight. Singing ensues.

US Title: Kalisto vs. Alberto Del Rio

Kalisto is challenging and they’ve been trading the title for a few weeks now. Kalisto starts fast with the strikes to send him outside for a suicide dive. Now you might think this is competitive, but JBL is right there to hammer in the ideas that David NEVER beats Goliath and that Kalisto is going to get destroyed. You know, in case you’re dumb enough to not get the idea here.

Back in and Del Rio kicks him down, followed by a top rope ax handle for two. That means JBL gets to talk about how fun it is to beat up luchadors. Two knees to the ribs have Kalisto in more trouble and it’s time to go after the mask. There’s some good heel psychology in there about someone with Del Rio knowing the tradition of the mask and going after it anyway but the announcers gloss over it.

Del Rio’s low superkick gets two and Kalisto gets the same off a springboard tornado DDT. Kalisto goes up top but gets caught in a reverse superplex. They HORRIBLY botch a Code Red (the sunset bomb) so Kalisto goes straight to the Salida Del Sol for two. Del Rio unhooks a turnbuckle pad and of course he goes into it, setting up another Salida Del Sol for the pin and the title at 11:32.

Rating: C+. Not bad here but the commentary was driving me crazy here. JBL kept talking about how there was NO WAY the smaller guy could win and that’s exactly what we saw happening. There’s a difference between setting up an idea and just hammering it into the ground, which is what we had here. The match itself was fine but I do wonder how they screwed up Kalisto. He might not have been a future World Champion but he’s someone that could have been a fixture in the midcard. Instead, he’s just a guy on the roster because we needed to feed him to Rusev down the line. You know, to feed him to Reigns.

Pre-show recap.

Paul Heyman comes up to Stephanie and says they can renegotiate Lesnar’s contract after he wins the Rumble. Stephanie is cool with that as long as Reigns is taken to Suplex City. Why she hates Reigns isn’t clear but I’d assume it’s because she just feels like it at the moment.

Recap of Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch. They were best friends but Charlotte won the title and realized she didn’t need Becky anymore. Becky talked Ric Flair into accepting the title shot for his daughter and we’re ready to roll.

Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch

Charlotte is defending and has her dad with her. Feeling out process to start with Charlotte shouldering her down. Becky goes right for the arm and the fans are entirely behind her. The announcers explain the Figure Eight as Charlotte grabs an armbar of her own. Back up and a kick to the chest puts Charlotte on the floor where Ric gets in Becky’s way. A clothesline drops the champ again so Flair kisses Becky for your weekly case of sexual assault (edited off the Network).

Charlotte takes over and grabs a cravate as the fans are WAY behind Becky here. Like moreso than usual. Thankfully Charlotte mocks the chants before doing the headscissor faceplants followed by the Figure Four necklock. Becky gets out and starts firing off dropkicks to take over but a neckbreaker puts Charlotte right back in control.

The Bexploder gets two and Charlotte’s spear gets the same. You can hear Flair freaking out as only he can and it wouldn’t be the same without that screaming. Becky gets a cross armbreaker out of the corner and the fans get right back into this, only to have a powerbomb break the hold to give Charlotte two. The Disarm-Her goes on but Flair throws his jacket at Becky for the distraction, allowing Charlotte to get another spear to retain at 11:34.

Rating: B. Another good match between the two of them but I’m really starting to roll my eyes at Flair’s interference. We get the concept already and there’s no need to keep doing it over and over. At some point Charlotte needs to drop him and once that happens, she’s going to go through the roof, which would turn out to be in a bigger way than anyone could have expected.

Charlotte beats on Becky post match but here’s Sasha Banks for the save and Bank Statement on the champ. Cole: “Sasha Banks making a statement with the Bank Statement!” I bet he spent two weeks coming up with that one.

Some fans went to the Performance Center under the ruse of being part of a focus group. The wound up getting to meet a full tour of the facility and met most of the NXT roster. Note to self: sign up for focus groups.

Rumble By the Numbers video, which is still one of my favorite annual traditions. This is tied in with the stats that Reigns, who is entering at #1, has to overcome to retain the title.

WWE World Title: Royal Rumble

Reigns is defending and comes in at #1, making the tagline One vs. All. We have 90 second intervals here and that’s rarely a good thing. I had forgotten about Reigns’ through the crowd entrance and how unfitting it was. Can you imagine him trying to pull that today without getting pummeled? Anyway Reigns is in at #2 and Rusev is in at #2, which is smart as they had an awesome final section to a battle royal on Smackdown back in 2015. They start slugging it out and even JBL knows they can’t keep up this pace. Rusev gets in a spinwheel kick but can’t throw him out. Well not over the top at least as he sends Roman through the ropes instead. The spear however is enough to put Rusev out as the clock begins.

And then, in perhaps the dumbest production decision I’ve ever seen in WWE, the camera stays on Reigns’ face as AJ STYLES makes his debut at #3. Like literally, the camera just locks in on Reigns as the crowd freaks out. They even posted a different cut of this on the WWE YouTube page because it was such a stupid visual. Thanks to the entrance taking forever, we only have time for AJ to not be able to hit the Styles Clash and a Samoan drop planting AJ.

Tyler Breeze is in at #4 and the fans are COMPLETELY behind AJ, which isn’t all that surprising. Breeze scores with a few right hands before a pretty unnecessary double team gets rid of him. Curtis Axel (with the WAY too over Social Outcasts) is in at #5 to send AJ into the buckle, earning himself some forearms to the face. Reigns gets back up and the Outcasts are beaten down until AJ clotheslines Axel out (JBL: “The chains are back on.”). Chris Jericho is in at #6 and we’ve got a snappy triple threat going here.

AJ gets knocked down and Reigns is sent into the post, leaving Styles to have to fight out of the Walls. Kane is in at #7 and Cole is WAY too fast to call him the greatest performer in the Rumble’s history. Wouldn’t it have helped if he had actually WON THE THING a time or two Cole? Styles goes right after the monster but gets kicked down and all four head to a corner until Goldust is in at #8. Not a lot happens here other than the fans chanting for AJ even more because he debuted as a star, which only a handful of people get to do. Ryback is in at #9 and gets to clean house without eliminating anyone.

AJ clotheslines Reigns in the corner to another big pop and it’s Kofi Kingston in at #10 (with New Day staying at ringside) so we can just start the clock for the big save. At the moment we have Reigns, Styles, Jericho, Kane, Goldust, Ryback and Kingston. AJ comes off the top to hit Jericho and it’s Titus O’Neil in at #11. Styles and Jericho take backbreakers and Goldust is tossed. Kofi almost gets rid of Reigns and is somehow even more popular than he’s been all night.

R-Truth is in at #12 and of course he pulls out a ladder and climbs up to retrieve….nothing. I forgot how much I enjoyed Truth’s confused gimmick. Kane pulls him down and tosses him out before throwing the ladder out as a bonus. A clothesline puts Kofi over the top and right onto Big E.’s shoulders for the big save. Eh not as good as some I’ve seen but you can’t have a classic every year. Luke Harper is in at #13 and here are Vince and the League of Nations to pull Roman to the floor (under the ropes of course). The champ is sent into the steps and kicked in the face by multiple members of the team.

This goes on so long that Stardust comes in at #14. Rusev splashes Reigns through the table as we have NO IDEA what is going on in the ring during all this. While we were gone, Jericho eliminated Kingston which was of course ignored by the announcers. Now for the stupid part: Vince and the Nation JUST LEAVES.

Like, they don’t throw him inside and then back out. They don’t pay someone off to get rid of Reigns. They don’t do anything but leave while Reigns is taken out on a stretcher. You would think Vince would have learned his lesson from Steve Austin in 1999 but he’s a heel so this is just really stupid instead of head caving in stupid. Big Show comes in at #15 and eliminates Titus and Ryback, giving us a lineup of Reigns (being taken out), Styles, Jericho, Kane, Harper, Stardust and Show. Reigns is now walking in front of the stretcher, making this even less of a good idea.

Styles escapes a chokeslam and it’s Neville in at #16. The rapid fire kicks stagger some people as Reigns is shown WALKING TO THE BACK UNDER HIS OWN POWER. What a hero he certainly is. Braun Strowman is in at #17 and hopefully some people are about to be tossed. Strowman casually eliminates Kane and has the showdown with Big Show. The standing choke (what a stupid move) knocks Show out and Strowman eliminates him a few seconds later.

A limping Kevin Owens is in at #18 and that’s good for one heck of a pop. Styles is there to meet him and you know the fans are into that. Neville throws AJ to the apron and Kevin adds a superkick to get rid of Styles, making himself a full on heel once again. Dean Ambrose is in at #19 and Owens is waiting on him to keep up the brawl from earlier. Since there’s nothing like a Royal Rumble for the World Title going on, let’s look at the Reigns beatdown from earlier.

Sami Zayn is in at #20 for a main roster cameo and of course he goes after Owens in a slugout. Kevin is gone in a hurry and we’ve got Reigns (not in the ring), Harper, Stardust, Jericho, Zayn, Ambrose, Neville and Strowman. Erick Rowan joins the field at #21 as the Wyatts are strong in this one. Harper and Rowan get together to get rid of Stardust and Neville as Strowman chokes Jericho out.

Mark Henry is in at #22 and is eliminated by the Wyatts in less than a minute. Strowman tosses Sami leaving Ambrose and Jericho to fight the monsters. Cole: “I don’t see any help coming anytime soon.” The clock is ticking down as he says this so you know it’s going to be someone big. As you might expect, Brock Lesnar is in at #23 and the place just goes NUTS.

It’s time for some suplexes with Harper and Rowan flying across the ring (not eliminated). It takes three clotheslines to drop Strowman and there goes Rowan. Harper takes a German suplex but Brock can’t suplex Strowman. Now THAT is a rub. Braun goes shoulder first into the post and another clothesline puts him down. Jack Swagger is in at #24 and lasts about fifteen seconds before Lesnar gets rid of him. More suplexes abound as Lesnar is rapidly running out of things to do.

The Miz is in at #25, giving us Reigns (you know the drill by now), Jericho, Harper, Strowman, Ambrose, Lesnar and Miz, who walks around for a bit before going in to face Brock. He actually gets on commentary and threatens to turn Disney World into Mizney World. Harper takes another German suplex and Strowman gets shouldered in the corner. That’s enough to get rid of Harper and Alberto Del Rio is in at #26. Alberto and Dean double team Lesnar in the corner and are promptly launched across the ring. Some clotheslines get rid of Strowman and the fans are VERY pleased.

Bray Wyatt gets lucky #27 and the other three Wyatts all get back in to pummel Brock. Brock tosses the three eliminated guys out again and suplexes Bray but Harper saves the F5 with a kick to the chest (or face if you’re Cole). Unlike Vince and the League (who did almost the same thing earlier), Bray is smart enough to ELIMINATE BROCK, who responds by……calmly walking away instead of, you know, breaking people in half and making a throw rug out of their entrails.

Dolph Ziggler is in at #28 and it’s FINALLY time for Miz to get in. A Skull Crushing Finale plants Dolph but Miz can’t put him out. Sheamus is in at #29 but Reigns jumps him in the aisle, over twenty four minutes after he left and over HALF AN HOUR after the beatdown started. Naturally he’s booed out of the building but still manages to get rid of Del Rio. I get that they’re trying to repeat the 1999 Royal Rumble and ignoring the fact that they’re copying the worst Rumble of all time, but there’s a big stretch between the biggest star of all time and Roman Reigns.

Anyway Roman fights Bray for a bit and it’s HHH in at #30 for one of the most obvious “swerves” in recent history. The final group is Reigns, Jericho, Ambrose, Wyatt, Ziggler, Sheamus and HHH, who gets a HUGE pop because the fans have a way out of Reigns winning the whole thing. Why the announcers have HHH stats despite him being A COMPLETE SURPRISE isn’t clear but we’ll chalk it up to the regular way of making it clear that this is entirely staged.

HHH and Reigns do the big staredown and the top heel is suddenly the big hero because that’s how little people care about Reigns. Ziggler charges into a Pedigree like a goof and Wyatt takes a spear so Reigns can have equal power. The facebuster looks to set up a Pedigree on Reigns but Sheamus and Ambrose throw them both to the apron. Jericho bulldogs Bray down and hits a Lionsault but takes a Zig Zag. A superkick can’t knock HHH off the apron and he gets back in to eliminate Ziggler a few seconds later.

Bray and HHH have a very interesting staredown which isn’t likely to go anywhere. Sheamus saves HHH from Sister Abigail and Bray is tossed. Dean and Sheamus fight for a bit until Jericho dives on Ambrose. A Codebreaker puts HHH down but Dean eliminates Jericho to get us down to four. Dean eats a Brogue Kick but sidesteps a charge to get rid of Sheamus, followed by HHH eliminating Reigns to the pop of the night.

So we’re down to Ambrose vs. HHH and Reigns stays on the floor instead out helping his buddy due to a combination of stupidity, honor and plot convenience. The rebound lariat (which Cole calls, I kid you not, the Wacky Line) has HHH in trouble and Dean sends him to the apron, only to be backdropped to the floor to make HHH the winner and champion at 1:01:42.

Rating: A-. This one took a good while to get going but once Reigns left, everything picked up. That’s where everything starts falling apart. This match is all about Reigns and the problem is very simple: people don’t seem to like him. It says a lot that Jericho lasted 51 minutes and Reigns officially went 58 though only one of them needed half an hour of rest. That right there is proof positive that Reigns probably isn’t going to be get cheered most of the time. This made him look very lame and that’s one of the worst things you can do to a star. Having him WALK OUT OF THE ARENA was just horrible and the worst possible idea.

The rest of the match was pretty awesome though as you had everyone fighting over the title. Unfortunately there are some major holes, such as Brock just walking away and having to wait for Reigns to come back. It’s not the best Rumble of all time as Reigns loomed over the whole thing but having the title on the line was a great idea and something I wish they did more often than every twenty four years. Give us some better options for the possible winner and ANYTHING other than Reigns vs. HHH as the big story and this is one of the best of all time.

HHH and family celebrate as fireworks take us out.

Overall Rating: A. This was a one match show and anything else worth watching on the show (such as the opener) was going to be more than enough to make this awesome. While it wound up setting the stage for the worst Wrestlemania in a long time, at least we have an awesome Royal Rumble to get us there. WWE had a lot of potential at this point, especially considering all the injuries they had at the time. It’s a strong Rumble, assuming you ignore the completely backwards reactions for Reigns.

Ratings Comparison

Mark Henry/Jack Swagger vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Darren Young/Damien Sandow vs. Ascension

Original: D+

Redo: D

Dean Ambrose vs. Kevin Owens

Original: B

Redo: B+

New Day vs. Usos


Original: C+

Redo: B-

Alberto Del Rio vs. Kalisto

Original: C

Redo: C+

Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch:

Original: C-

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: A-

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: A

What was up with me hating the women like that?

Here’s the original rating if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/01/24/royal-rumble-2016-this-rumble-game-thing/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Smackdown – January 21, 2022: Try Something Else

Smackdown
Date: January 21, 2022
Location: Bridgestone Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

We have less than two weeks to go before the Royal Rumble and that means it is time to finalize everything else for the show. That can take some effort and hopefully we will be seeing some of it tonight. Odds are a lot of the focus is going to be on Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s showdown between Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns, with Rollins having to bail from the Usos.

Here are the Usos to get things going. They are here to acknowledge Roman Reigns, who is now the longest reigning Universal Champion in history. This brings out Reigns, who takes his time getting to the ring. Reigns holds out his hand for Jimmy, who puts the microphone in his hand. After telling Nashville to acknowledge him, we get a highlight package on Reigns’ title reign, including his major title defenses and a count of his days as champion.

Before Reigns can say anything, here is Seth Rollins to interrupt (McAfee: “You son of a b****.”). Rollins says that was a nice video, but now it’s time to end the show. Reigns had to send his cousins to Raw to attack him but all Reigns had to do was give him a call because he has Rollins’ number. Instead, we need to celebrate the Usos, because they hold up Reigns’ title, “just like me and Mox did in the Shield.” Reigns: “Did John Cena write that promo for you?”

Reigns says their match will be one on one, but Rollins wants to beat the Usos tonight to guarantee that they will be gone. Jey points out that Rollins doesn’t have a partner because no one likes him….but here is Kevin Owens to take the spot. Reigns wants to raise the stakes: if Rollins and Owens lose, the Rumble title match is off and Reigns is going on vacation until Wrestlemania. Rollins says he’s on.

Here are Madcap Moss and Happy Corbin to brag about their recent success, along with saying Kofi Kingston has no friends.

Madcap Moss vs. Kofi Kingston

Happy Corbin is here too….so Kofi brings out Big E. to even things up. Moss shoulders Kingston down to start but he comes back with a middle rope spinning dropkick. Kingston gets sent outside, where he jumps off the steps to take Moss down again. Big E. takes out Corbin and we go to a break. Back with Moss hitting a spinebuster but missing a charge into the corner. A top rope hurricanrana gives Kingston two as Big E. continues to look on stoically. Moss plants him again for two more but it’s Trouble in Paradise to give Kofi the pin at 7:42.

Rating: C. I can support anything that involves Moss getting kicked in the face and at least his roll slows down a bit. Moss is someone that WWE seems to want to push at least a little bit, but he isn’t someone who needs to be dominating every match. Kingston slowing him down a big is a good thing, though I could go for less Moss and Corbin in general.

Post match Corbin, who is holding his arm, gets up to stare at Big E., who gives Moss the Big Ending.

Aliyah vs. Natalya

Rematch from last week where Aliyah won in three seconds. Summer Rae, billed as a legend and now with red hair, is watching from the front row. Aliyah rolls her up for two to start but gets suplexed for her efforts. Back up and Aliyah is sent to the apron, where she comes back with a forearm. Natalya blasts her with the discus lariat for two, followed by the over the shoulder backbreaker. With that broken up, Natalya stomps away in the corner until it’s a DQ at 2:10.

Post match the beating stays on until Xia Li remembers that she still works here and comes out for the save.

Commentary hypes up Wrestlemania, with McAfee listing off about two dozen ways to describe how great it is, even busting out a dictionary.

Los Lotharios vs. Viking Raiders

Erik slams Humberto to start and then slams Ivar onto him to make it worse. Angel comes in off a blind tag though and it’s Erik getting jumped from behind. That means Angel can TAKE OFF HIS PANTS and ti’s a double basement dropkick. The standing moonsault misses though and the hot tag brings in Ivar to clean house. Everything breaks down and Erik hits a powerbomb/World’s Strongest Slam at the same time. The Viking Experience finishes Humberto at 2:23.

We recap Naomi threatening Sonya Deville last week, causing Adam Pearce to give Naomi another Championship Contender’s match this week.

Naomi vs. Charlotte

Non-title but a Champion’s Contender’s match, which Cole describes as an opportunity at an opportunity. Hold on though because here is Sonya Deville to be referee. Charlotte uses the distraction to forearm Naomi into the corner so the stomping can ensue. The Figure Four necklock has Naomi in trouble but she fights up for a springboard kick to the face. Charlotte is fine enough to grab a Boston crab, which doesn’t go very far.

Instead Charlotte tries the Figure Four but gets kicked off into Sonya. The Rear View connects but Sonya stays on the floor instead counting. Charlotte goes after the leg and puts on the Figure Four, drawing the bell for the submission at 2:24, before she even completes the hold. McAfee: “What in the Bret Hart is going on?” I’d call it a story that has long since been made clear but we’re still hammering it in because WWE has a problem with getting to the point.

Seth Rollins and Kevin Owens are ready for the main event, with Owens saying it’s time to take out the Usos so they can’t screw Rollins over again. Rollins says the risk is worth the reward, because he beats Reigns every time.

Here is Sami Zayn for the latest episode of In-Zayn, which will be looking at self defense. Johnny Knoxville once got famous by looking at a bunch of these weapons, and that is what Sami is going to do again here. We’ll start with a stun gun designed to stop large animals, including a rhinoceros. Sami shoots himself in the leg but doesn’t go off his feet. We’ll crank it up to level two, with this one going into his heart.

That one takes him off his feet, but here is Johnny Knoxville to interrupt. He doesn’t think much of Sami mocking his career, and points out that Sami didn’t turn the stun gun on. Knoxville fixes that for him and shocks Zayn down, complete with Mountie shock stick sound effects. Sami can’t stand up so Knoxville tosses him over the top.

Eric Bischoff is in Adam Pearce’s office when Sonya Deville comes in. Pearce isn’t happy with what she has been doing, so he is going to recommend she face Naomi next week, one on one.

Video on the new WWE 2K game.

Sheamus vs. Ricochet

Ridge Holland is back and in Sheamus’ corner. Sheamus knees him down to start and grabs a chinlock, with Ricochet jawbreaking his way to freedom. The forearms to the chest put Ricochet down again, as Cole says the only title Sheamus has won everything but the Intercontinental Title. Or the 24/7 Title. Or the Universal Title. Ricochet knocks him to the floor but his suicide dive is kneed out of the air. Back in and the Brogue Kick finishes Ricochet at 3:18.

Rating: C-. Remember last week when these two had a nice match that got some time? This was almost nothing like that as Ricochet got squashed while getting in very little offense. Sheamus winning a midcard match is fine, but I’m really not sure why they needed to run this back when Sheamus beat him soundly enough last week.

Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura run into Jeff Jarrett, with Boogs knocking how to spell his name. Jeff likes Boogs’ guitar playing but asks if Boogs can spell his name. Boogs looks to have cut his hair and looks quite a bit like Robert/Rick Rude.

Usos vs. Kevin Owens/Seth Rollins

Non-title but if the Rollins/Owens win, the Usos are barred from the Royal Rumble title match. If the Usos won, the title match is off. Rollins rolls Jimmy up for two to start and Jimmy bails to the floor, where he complains of a pull of his tights. Back in and the Usos stomp Rollins down in the corner. Rollins fights up and it’s Jimmy being taken into the other corner for some alternating stomps of his own. A Jey distraction lets Jimmy crotch Rollins though and the stomping in the corner is on again.

That one doesn’t last long either as Rollins is back up with the tag to Owens so house can be cleaned. The Cannonball looks to set up the Swanton but Jey gets the knees up. Owens is sent outside and into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Owens still in trouble but managing an enziguri for a breather. The tag brings in Rollins to clean house, including a suicide dive onto both Usos.

The springboard knee to the face gets two on Jey so Rollins loads up the Buckle Bomb. That’s broken up though and the Alley Us gives Jimmy two. Everything breaks down and Owens gets caught on top, only to hit the spinning fisherman’s superplex for two. It’s back to Rollins to strike away on both Usos until a superkick takes him down. The Stunner hits Jey and Rollins superkicks Jimmy. A forearm to the back of the head hits Jimmy and the Stomp connects but here is Roman Reigns to lay Rollins out for the DQ at 15:03.

Rating: B. I’m guessing the idea is that Reigns is so confident that he can beat Rollins on his own that he doesn’t care if the Usos are there or not, but it doesn’t exactly make him look smart. It can be made better if they explain that next week, though commentary saying something about it this week might have helped a bit. It also doesn’t help that this felt like a last second way out of the Usos losing because time was up. I’ll take the lack of a pin, but explain your story a bit better than that.

Reigns storms off and Rollins smiles to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The main event was good but this felt like a good bit of placeholder matches which didn’t really do much for the Royal Rumble. Ricochet and Naomi lose again and we continue the epic Natalya vs. Aliyah feud. The important part of the Royal Rumble is set, though it would have been nice to build up some other participants instead of focusing on stuff like Moss and Sonya Deville. Pretty much a throwaway show here and not their best effort.

Results
Kofi Kingston b. Madcap Moss – Trouble in Paradise
Aliyah b. Natalya via DQ when Natalya attacked her in the corner
Viking Raiders b. Los Lotharios – Viking Raiders to Humberto
Charlotte b. Naomi – Figure Four
Sheamus b. Ricochet – Brogue Kick
Seth Rollins/Kevin Owens b. Usos via DQ when Roman Reigns interfered

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2010 (2013 Redo): The Surprise Surprise

Royal Rumble 2010
Date: January 31, 2010
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 16,697
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker

We’re getting close to the end of the run here with only three shows left. Tonight we’ve got the Rumble of course along with Undertaker defending against Mysterio and Sheamus defending against Orton. I remember really liking this one as the new generation had arrived and was rising up the card. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about the Road to Wrestlemania is beginning and how it determines what happens for months to come. This is called the most star studded Rumble ever, which is a tagline that has been used before.

ECW Title: Christian vs. Ezekiel Jackson

Christian is defending and man that ECW ring announcer has an annoying voice. Regal is with Jackson here. According to Striker, Jackson went to Columbia Law School. Now there’s a factoid that fell through the cracks. Jackson shoves Christian into the corner and then does it again into the ropes so the champion slaps him in the face. After a brief chase, Christian dropkicks Jackson out to the floor.

The springboard plancha takes Jackson out and we head back in. Christian finally gets caught in the corner and pounded on before having the Killswitch easily blocked. Instead Christian chokes away on the ropes and hits another shot to the face. Jackson throws Christian to the floor where Regal tries to throw him back in, earning himself an ejection. Off to a neck crank back inside which Jackson picks up into a kind of cobra clutch slam for two.

A vertical suplex gets two for Big Zeke and it’s time for more choking. A sunset flip is easily blocked by Jackson and it’s back to the chinlock. Striker tries to figure out what a peep is, as he knows it as a something made of chocolate. Some shots to the face get Christian out of trouble for awhile, or at least until a clothesline to the back of the head gets two.

Jackson hooks both of Christian’s arms back for another hold before putting the champion on top. The superplex is blocked and Christian hits a top rope back elbow for two (LOVE that move). Jackson’s big clothesline misses and a middle rope dropkick gets two for the champion. A spinwheel kick gets two on Jackson but a swan dive misses and gives Zeke a near fall as does a backbreaker.

The tornado DDT gets ANOTHER two for Christian so Jackson takes his head off with a clothesline. Off to a sleeper from Christian when the Killswitch doesn’t work but Jackson counters into a powerslam position to ram Christian’s back into the buckle. Christian slides down Jackson’s back and grabs the Killswitch out of nowhere to retain.

Rating: C+. Trim two minutes out of this and it goes WAY up in quality. The period of near falls went on too long without getting any significant heat from the crowd. Jackson would get the title in a little over two weeks on the final episode of ECW because if there’s one man that should be the final ECW Champion, it’s a musclehead that could barely get through a five minute match most of the time.

Cryme Tyme come in to try to get a second spot in the Rumble from Teddy and Tiffany. Khali says “no dice homeslice” to selling their spot because he’s keeping it real. Apparently he’s learned his English from Family Matters (Singh’s words, not mine). Ok then. Anyway US Champion the Miz comes in and laughs which causes him to have to defend against MVP.

Orton is in the back when Cody Rhodes comes in. He’s there for Randy in the title match tonight but that’s not all. Apparently DiBiase isn’t in on this because his mind is on winning the Rumble and taking the title from Orton.

US Title: The Miz vs. MVP

A quick clothesline gets two for MVP and he works on the champ’s ribs to start. Miz gets a boot up in the corner to slow him down but MVP comes right back with a belly to back suplex for two. They head to the floor for this gem from Striker: “Miz is one of the most recognizable faces on this planet.” I don’t think Miz is one of the most recognizable faces in this match.

Back in and Miz sends MVP to the apron and gets kicked into the table on the floor. Not that this is treated like anything of note because the announcers are laughing about Sherri Shepard from The View. Miz sends shoulders into MVP’s ribs in the corner followed by the running corner clothesline. A top rope double ax gets two for Miz and we hit the chinlock.

After that eats up some time, MVP pounds away with all of his usual stuff. Ballin hits and a running boot to the side of the head gets two for the challenger. A big shoulder block gets the same for MVP but he misses a running boot in the corner. MVP grabs three straight quick near falls but gets caught in a small package for the pin to keep the title on Miz.

Rating: D+. If there was a reason for this to be on PPV other than the show was running short, I don’t know what it was. Miz didn’t look like anything special out there but somehow he would be world champion a year later. MVP on the other hand would be out of the WWE but he did well enough in Japan. Nothing to see here other than a filler match.

Post match MVP hits the Playmaker on Miz and gets booed LOUDLY. He lost completely clean so the booing is deserved.

Show and Jericho, the former tag team champions, run into each other. Show accuses him of being jealous of the chemistry Show and Miz have but Jericho brushes it off. He calls the crowd gelatinous worms before pointing out all of the similarities he and Miz have. Show says he’ll throw both Miz and Jericho out to win the Rumble. R-Truth pops up and says he’ll do the same. Show leaves Jericho standing there much to Jericho’s chagrin.

DiBiase wishes Orton luck and says he’s got Randy’s back. Orton asks where Cody is but DiBiase doesn’t know. This was during the time when Legacy was about to die and both members were trying to get on Randy’s best side. DiBiase claims that Rhodes only wants to win the Rumble but Orton has heard enough. He doesn’t want anyone’s help and gets a clear face pop in response.

The National Guard is here.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Sheamus won the title in a shocker last month at TLC and is heel here. He’s also still not that good and wouldn’t really hit his stride for about a year and a half. They stare at each other to start and my goodness is Sheamus pale. A dropkick puts the champion down but he comes right back with a running ax handle. Sheamus gets in a shot to the arm and we head to the floor where said arm is sent into the steps.

Back in and Orton goes for the knee and things slow down a bit. Orton wouldn’t really pick up the pace of his offense until about the following year which made his matches pretty hard to sit through. Sheamus comes back by sending Orton’s shoulder into the post twice and hitting some shoulder blocks in the corner. That gets him nowhere though as Orton takes out the knee again and knocks Sheamus to the floor.

They head inside again and yet AGAIN momentum shifts back to Sheamus as he hits a DDT on the arm for two. Off to an armbar for a bit before they slug it out to the boo/yay chants. Orton wins the slugout but walks into the Irish Curse for two. The High Cross is escaped and Orton kicks Sheamus in the head to send him to the outside. Orton gets ready for the RKO but Rhodes jumps the guardrail and blasts Sheamus in the back before running away. The referee sees it though and despite Orton hitting the RKO, he’s disqualified and Sheamus keeps the title. Lame ending to a pretty lame match.

Rating: D+. Like I said, Sheamus just wasn’t very good yet. He was still this big imposing brawler who pounded on people and that’s about it. There was indeed a story in the match but it wasn’t a very entertaining one as they just kept beating on each other’s limbs but when there’s no difference because of the beating, the story doesn’t work. The ending didn’t help either but it did set up something in the future.

Post match Orton snaps on Cody as DiBiase comes down to save his partner. While Orton yells at Cody in the corner, Sheamus comes back in and lays out Randy with a Brogue Kick.

We recap Mickie vs. McCool. This was an awkward feud as Mickie won the title shot in a triple threat and then Laycool made fun of Mickie for being fat. This is of course odd as Mickie is a professional athlete and gorgeous and would only be called fat by a crazy person. It’s also pretty disturbing when you consider how WWE pushes the Divas as role models. The final bit of it was a segment where Mickie got beaten down and covered in food.

Women’s Title: Michelle McCool vs. Mickie James

Pre match Michelle runs her mouth about how fat Mickie is and accuses her of skipping out on the match. Michelle offers cake and here’s Layla in a Mickie Pig costume. The real Mickie sprints to the ring and hits a Thesz Press on Layla on the floor. She heads inside, sends Michelle into Layla and hits the MickieDT for the pin and the title in 20 seconds.

Post match the other Divas bring out a cake and smash it into Laycool’s faces.

We recap Mysterio vs. Undertaker. Rey won the shot by slamming a cage door onto Batista’s head to escape because that’s what heroes do. Taker said he’ll show no mercy on Mysterio so Rey uses the same line everyone does on Taker: he isn’t afraid. Batista beat up Mysterio as well, claiming that Undertaker and the world title was his.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Undertaker

Mysterio, in the deep south, comes out wearing a white hood. Striker talks about Lawler being in the ring with Kamala and Lord Humongous (Sid) because he thinks it makes him sound interesting. He’s trying to make a comparison to being in the ring with Undertaker, but if he was as smart as he thinks he is, he would ask Jerry what it’s like to be in the ring with Undertaker himself, which would save a lot of headaches.

Rey fires off some shots in the corner before Taker grabs him by the neck and throws him up and over the top and out to the floor. That looked awesome. Back to the apron and Rey fires off strikes to the face, only to get punched right back down to the floor by a single shot. Taker misses the legdrop on the apron but hits it the second time before heading back in. Rey counters a chokeslam into the 619 but Taker easily grabs the legs. Tombstone is countered and Taker misses an elbow drop.

Rey tries a springboard cross body but jumps into a boot to the chest. We head to the floor again and there’s another big boot to the head to take Rey down. A third big boot keeps Rey down but the fourth misses and Taker sends his leg around the post. Rey hits a baseball slide to send the leg into said post and Taker is in trouble. The seated senton off the apron is caught and Taker puts him back on the apron, only to be caught by an Asai Moonsault to put both guys down.

Taker grabs Rey by the throat and slams him into the barricade. The champion’s nose is busted a bit. Taker does that lifting wristlock of his to crank on the arm a bit before punching Rey down in the corner for a bit. A big side slam gets two for the guy who would use a side slam in this match as Striker goes into this big speech about how the blood shows that undertaker is mortal. Seriously, it’s a BLOODY NOSE. Watch the freaking Lesnar match in the Cell when the blood is literally dripping from Taker’s head and down onto Lesnar’s body.

Rey starts firing off some punches but a single shot from Taker is enough to put him back down. A jawbreaker finally staggers the big man and they do a kind of cross body, although Taker counters into something like Langston’s Big Ending, so it’s hard to say which hurt worse. Taker sits up so Rey kicks him in the face. Why has no one done that before? Rey drops the dime (springboard legdrop) for two but Taker kills him with a big clothesline. The Last Ride is countered and the 619 hits as does a second one, but the West Coast Pop is countered into the Last Ride to retain the title.

Rating: B. This was solid stuff for the most part for a few reasons. First of all, they didn’t make Taker look ridiculous to get into position for Rey’s moves. That’s my biggest issue with most of Rey’s battles against giants: how stupid the big men look. The other good thing here is that Taker wasn’t knocked silly after just a few moves. Rey only hit maybe a dozen offensive moves here other than basic strikes and it wouldn’t have made sense to have Taker in major trouble. Finally, Rey can bump like crazy when he’s trying to. The only issues here are the lack of a threat to Taker and Striker’s commentary. Chill out already man.

Shawn is watching in the back when Kane comes in and says Shawn’s obsession with Taker is unhealthy. This is KANE calling something unhealthy. He warns Shawn to cool it with Taker because it won’t end well. Kane leaves and HHH comes in. Shawn apologizes for whatever happened on Raw which apparently isn’t important enough to specify. HHH agrees Shawn vs. Taker is meant to be, but it won’t be by wining the Rumble.

Rumble by the Numbers time:

23 Winners

627 entrants eliminated

36 eliminations by Austin

11 eliminations by Kane in 2001

2002 was the last Rumble in Atlanta

62:12 Rey was in the Rumble in 2006

2 seconds was the record for 20 years until Santino broke it last year

3 wins for Austin

2 win for #1, the same as #30

70% of the winners win at Mania

Royal Rumble

Dolph Ziggler is #1 and Evan Bourne is #2. Bourne snaps off a headscissors to start and follows up with a spinwheel kick to take Dolph down. Ziggler comes back with the Zig Zag but can’t throw Evan out. Bourne decks Ziggler and hits Air Bourne as CM Punk of the Straightedge Society is #3. He slams the other two guys’ heads together and dumps them out one after the other. Punk gets a mic and says that tonight is the greatest night in the history of the Straightedge Society. These two are just the first of 29 men who will challenge him, but they can be saved.

The clock starts running down, so Punk gives us the line of the night: “Excuse me, it’s clobberin time.” JTG is #4 and after a few clotheslines, he poses like an idiot in the corner and gets dumped. Punk gets the mic again and says that not everyone can be saved because they don’t have his dedication. Great Khali is #5 and Punk immediately says he can make Khali greater by saving him. He asks Khali to raise his hand for the Straightedge Pledge but Khali lowers the hand onto Punk’s head for the chop.

There’s the Khali Vice and in less than 90 seconds, Beth Phoenix of all people is #6. She stares down Khali and gets picked up and placed on the apron. Beth kisses Khali but in the process pulls him over the top to eliminate him. Phoenix gets back in and BEATS UP PUNK, only to get caught in a GTS to the chest. Would that really knock her out? Before she’s dumped out, here’s Zack Ryder at #7.

As Ryder gets in, Punk grabs the mic and says Zack has potential. PREACH IT BROTHER! Punk starts offering him a spot but his Ryder with the mic before he gets done with it. The fans are going nuts for Punk now and there goes Ryder. Punk talks about how great he is and wants to know who is next, but whoever it is, they’re inferior to Punk. In at #8 is HHH as we enter the second segment of the Rumble.

They stare each other down and HHH starts punching. The facebuster has Punk staggered and a spinebuster puts him down as Drew McIntyre is #9. That gives us a tag champion in HHH and the IC Champion in Drew at the moment. HHH is looking a bit flabby here. He hits the high knee on McIntyre and escapes the GTS to eliminate Punk. DiBiase is #10 as we’re flying through this.

HHH gets double teamed down in the corner until John Morrison, the guy that lost the title to McIntyre, is #11. He takes both heels down and pounds away on them before hitting a jumping DDT on Drew. Starship Pain almost completely misses Drew and HHH clotheslines John down. Kane is #12 and comes in with the top rope clothesline to HHH. There’s a double chokeslam to McIntyre and Morrison before Kane tries to dump DiBiase.

Rhodes is #13 and saves Ted as he comes in. Morrison is sent to the apron and springboards back in, only to get dropkicked out of the air. Legacy goes after Kane but HHH saves him for no apparent reason. Cody saves himself from being eliminated and MVP is #14. Miz runs up behind him though and blasts MVP with the US Title. Morrison hits the Moonlight Drive on McIntyre to break up the Future Shock on Kane. HHH is in trouble in the corner and MVP is carried to the back.

Carlito is #15 and the ring is starting to get full. There’s a Backstabber to HHH and one for Drew and Ted as well. Miz is #16 and hits a quick Finale on Carlito. Cue MVP to clothesline Miz out and eliminate himself in the process. Matt Hardy is #17 and lasts about 20 seconds before Kane puts him out. HHH immediately dumps Kane too and the ring is a lot more empty all of a sudden.

HHH starts laying out everyone and Shawn is #18. Carlito is backdropped out, Rhodes and DiBiase are tossed, Morrison gets dumped, and DX puts out McIntyre to get us down to DX. Before anything can happen though, Cena is #19 to get us to the final third of the match. Cena cleans house and hits a double Shuffle before getting caught in the Pedigree. Out of nowhere Shawn superkicks HHH out to pop the crowd BIG.

Shelton Benjamin in that stupid gold period is #20. He hits Paydirt on both guys but gets dumped by Cena in less than 50 seconds. Yoshi Tatsu is #21 and doesn’t even make it 30 seconds. Big Show is #22 and Cena is shaken. Big Show RUNS down to the ring and house is cleaned. Shawn and Cena try to eliminate each other but Show pulls Shawn back in for some reason. What’s up with that tonight?

Mark Henry is #23 and we get a quick battle of the giant. Who would think those two would have a world title feud a year and a half later and be REALLY popular? Henry slams Show and falls on Cena as he tries an AA. Show spears Henry down and Chris Masters is #24. Masters tries the Masterlock on Show and gets dumped for his efforts. Now Henry goes after Show but Shawn breaks it up for some reason. R-Truth is #25 and actually dumps BOTH big guys. There’s something you wouldn’t expect.

Truth hits a Stroke on Cena and Jack Swagger is #26. All three guys get Vader Bombs and Swagger goes old school with a very slow Oklahoma Stampede. Jack knocks Michaels to the apron but can’t get the elimination. Kingston is #27 and cleans house on Swagger, hitting the Boom Drop and dumping him out with a nice leverage move. Truth puts Kofi on the apron but gets pulled out by a reverse headscissors.

Jericho is #28 but after cleaning about half the house, Cena grabs an AA to put him down. Shawn adds the top rope elbow and tunes up the band but Kofi hits Trouble in Paradise to take him out. Cena dumps Kofi but walks into a Codebreaker. Everyone is down and EDGE makes his big return at #29. That’s rather brilliant instead of waiting for the big surprise at #30, we get a SWERVE that actually makes sense.

Everyone gets a spear and Jericho is out. Edge is back about six months early and it’s Edge-O-Matics all around. Batista is #30, giving us a final four of Shawn, Cena, Edge and Batista. Not bad at all. It’s power all around but Edge spears him down. Everyone is down now Shawn gets up first and hits the forearm on Cena followed by the nipup.

Shawn slams every American in sight and drops the top rope elbow on Cena. Batista takes one too as Edge is still down in the corner. Sweet Chin Music hits Cena and there’s one for Batista as well. Edge clotheslines Shawn to the apron and Michaels superkicks Edge back in, only to get knocked out by Batista. The crowd gasps HUGE at that and Shawn is about to cry. Shawn gets back in and superkicks the referee to vent some frustration. Shawn FINALLY leaves and Cena escapes the Batista Bomb before dumping Batista out. Edge misses the spear but throws out Cena a second later to go to Wrestlemania.

Rating: A-. This is kind of a hard one to grade. They definitely followed the three act structure which helped a lot and the match was VERY fast paced. I mean, the longest anyone was in there was Cena and he barely broke 20 minutes. The problem with that is it doesn’t give anything time to develop. The main story was Shawn which is fine and he would get to Mania at the end of the day anyway. It’s a really fun Rumble but not one of the best ever.

Overall Rating: B. The Rumble is very solid and the rest has nothing terrible so we’ll call it a good show overall. Things would get a lot more interesting soon after this with the rise of the Nexus and a very solid Wrestlemania. This was also a time of transition for the company as a lot of the guys in this show would be gone by the end of the year. Anyway good show here and worth checking out.

Ratings Comparison

Christian vs. Ezekiel Jackson

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Miz vs. MVP

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

Redo: D+

Mickie James vs. Michelle McCool

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Undertaker vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: C-

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: A

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: B

Dang I liked Sheamus a lot more than I thought I did.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/29/royal-rumble-count-up-2010-one-of-the-best-ever/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Day One 2022 Preview

We’ve got a new show this week and this time it is based around a new year. I’m not sure how interesting that is for a full pay per view, but WWE has set things up around flimsier premises before. The good thing is the card looks pretty solid and we could be in for a nice event. That is assuming the Coronavirus pandemic doesn’t wreck anything at the last minute. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Ricochet/Cesaro vs. Sheamus/Ridge Holland

This was added earlier in the week and it sounds good on paper. If nothing else, it is nice to see Ricochet and Cesaro getting some kind of a spot, as they so often feel like people just there to fill in time on television when no one else is available. Sheamus and Holland could make for a nice mentor/mentee twist on the Bar, which seems to be the focal point of how we got here in the first place.

As for the match, I can’t imagine Sheamus and Holland losing when they seem to be a bit of a project for the future. It doesn’t help that Ricochet and Cesaro are the definition of jobbers to the stars at this point and I can’t imagine that is going to change in the span of a Kickoff Show match. That’s more than a bit depressing, but both of their ships seem to have sailed a long time ago.

Edge vs. The Miz

Let’s get one of the bigger ones out of the way first as we have what could have been a much more interesting match that just never made it to that next level. These two had some outstanding promo battles but after that it turned into a much more standard WWE build towards a big match. It still feels like a pretty good showdown, but there is something missing from the whole thing.

I’ll go with Miz winning due to some Maryse interference, which brings us to the missing thing: Beth Phoenix, who seems rather likely to come back and make this a mixed tag, maybe even at Wrestlemania. I don’t know if it’s interesting enough to go that far, but it’s hard to imagine that we don’t get the tag match at some point. You have a pretty hard time getting there with Edge winning, so Miz takes the first match.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos(c) vs. New Day

Yes, we’re at it again, as these teams seem destined to feud forever. The good thing is you can more or less guarantee a near classic with this one so it isn’t like it’s a bad idea. I’m sure the match will be very good, but it is a little hard to get excited when it seemed they were building to King Woods vs. Roman Reigns for the Universal Title and instead we’re getting a match that has been done nearly to death.

The more I think about it, the more I could see New Day winning here so we’ll go with that. It’s not like they need another title reign, but the Usos have held the things for a long, long time now and it might be smart to shake things up a bit. Throw in Paul Heyman being fired by Reigns and the team might be a little shaky by comparison. Either way, this should be a near classic, as these four tend to have.

Raw Tag Team Titles: RKBro(c) vs. Street Profits

I’m not sure how, but this feels like a heck of a showdown between two teams that are quite the big deals. RKBro has held the titles for about four months while the Profits are one of the better teams going today. That should make for a showdown and they worked well together in their previous match. That’s a nice feeling to have for a Tag Team Title match for a change, as it doesn’t happen on the red side very often.

I’ll take RKBro to retain, but they’re getting into a weird spot with their title reign. They are all but out of teams to give them a run for their money (save for the Profits here) and I don’t know who takes the titles from them if they make it out of this one. There aren’t many other options so while there is a chance they do a switch here, I think there is enough left in RKBro to validate them holding the titles.

Drew McIntyre vs. Madcap Moss

Here’s the easiest match on the show, as you have a former multiple time World Champion against a literal comedy guy. Somehow this match is taking place over a sword that was stabbed into a desk, which has to be up there for the weirdest/weakest reasons to have a pay per view match. I think we all know what to expect here and in this case, that is not a bad thing.

McIntyre wins here, in what should be dominant fashion, as even Happy Corbin’s interference isn’t enough to keep Moss around. It would not be out of the question to see McIntyre challenging for the Universal Title at Wrestlemania and there is no sense at all in having him lose what feels like a squash. Then again, it makes little sense to have him in this match in the first place, but at least he should win it pretty easily.

WWE Title: Big E.(c) vs. Seth Rollins vs. Kevin Owens vs. Bobby Lashley

They are in a pretty awkward spot here as Lashley is looking like the star of stars on Monday Night Raw at the moment but Big E. has already gone over him twice. It also doesn’t help that Lashley was such a dominant champion and had cleared out the main event scene, so it isn’t like they have many other options for him should he get the title back. That leaves Rollins and Owens as the underdogs, which could open some doors for them.

I’ll still go with Big E. though, as Rollins doesn’t seem likely to get the title back and Owens is probably there to take the pin. Big E. has been badly overshadowed by Lashley in recent weeks and I’m not sure how much longer he is going to keep the title. It seems like Lashley’s to win, unless they find something else for him to do in a hurry. Big E. retains for now though, even if it is just keeping it on him for a short while.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch(c) vs. Liv Morgan

Man alive I wanted to get into this match but, as usual, WWE has managed to take away almost everything that made Morgan interesting in the first place. The fans got behind Morgan because she was an underdog who probably shouldn’t be here but kept fighting anyway. Now she is being presented like a main event star and it has taken me pretty far out of the whole thing.

As much as I would love to see Morgan win the title, I can’t imagine they pull the trigger on anything that doesn’t involve one of the already established big stars. That has plagued WWE for a long time now, even if Morgan taking the title could be a heck of a feel good moment. Lynch is likely to retain here, probably in a more definitive manner than before, and then WWE will wonder why the division is falling apart right in front of them.

Smackdown World Title: Roman Reigns(c) vs. Brock Lesnar

Oh boy I’m not sure where to go with this one and that makes for a pretty fascinating main event. The Paul Heyman factor changes everything, and now the question is not so much when Heyman returns but rather does he do it here. That would be a heck of a fast turnaround for him to be back though and I don’t think it happens so soon. That gives us a problem though, and unfortunately I think I know where it’s going.

I think they actually do the title change here, as Reigns isn’t good enough to beat Lesnar without Heyman in his corner. That is going to open up a long list of issues, but for now I think Lesnar takes the title, likely setting up some big showdown at Wrestlemania for when they really want to do something new. These two are forever joined at the hip, and this time I think it’s Lesnar taking the title again.

Overall Thoughts

Overall, I’m liking what we’re seeing with this show and it could be a good one. Now that being said, this is WWE and there is always the chance that they are going to screw something up. I’m not sure how big of a show this is going to be going forward, but the first edition is a stacked card that could be quite good if it lives up to its rather high potential.

 

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Smackdown – December 24, 2021: Santa Will Be Pleased (Maybe)

Smackdown
Date: December 24, 2021
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

It’s Christmas Eve and thankfully we are taped instead of running a live show. We have a stacked card this week too, with a 12 man gauntlet match for to crown a new #1 contender to the Intercontinental Title, along with a showdown for the SmackDown Women’s Title as Charlotte defends against Toni Storm. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the end of last year’s show, with Roman Reigns hugging Paul Heyman, then firing him and laying him out with the Superman Punch. Then it was Brock Lesnar coming out and attacking Reigns to wrap things up.

Earlier today, Kayla Braxton sat down with a disheveled Paul Heyman (he needs to shave) so he can tell his side of the story. What happened was he was publicly fired, publicly attacked and publicly shamed. He told Roman Reigns the truth and he paid the price for it, publicly. Heyman doesn’t regret telling the truth because he was doing his job as special counsel.

Last week, his things had been thrown out of the locker room, but he had done his job. Reigns is the greatest Universal Champion of all time, but he needs to be protected from Brock Lesnar. Maybe now he needs to go to NXT and cherry pick a top talent and start over. But no, not at this stage. He put everything into Roman Reigns, but without him, maybe it’s time to acknowledge that his career is most likely over. Sweet goodness this man is talented.

Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Toni Storm

Charlotte is defending. They fight over a lockup to start with Storm not being able to get very far. Charlotte kicks her in the ribs but gets crossbodied down for an early one. The champ needs a breather on the floor before coming back in to stomp/chop away in the corner. We hit the figure four necklock for a bit until Charlotte flips her over, setting up the nipup. Back up and Storm scores with a headbutt, only to get kicked out to the floor as we take a break.

We come back with Charlotte slapping her in the face and shouting about how much better she is than Storm. That’s enough to get Storm back up, so Charlotte blasts her with a clothesline. Storm finally hits a snap suplex but Charlotte forearms her in the corner. The Downward Spiral into the middle buckle cuts Storm off yet again, setting up the double moonsault for a double two.

Natural Selection is blocked though and Storm hits a quick German suplex. Not that it matters as Charlotte pulls her into the Figure Four (it takes a bit but she gets there), forcing Toni to roll into the ropes for the break. Back up and a big boot sends Storm out to the floor to keep up the near dominance. Some rollups give Storm two but Charlotte reverses into a small package of her own to retain at 14:35.

Rating: B-. Charlotte dominated the majority of the match until it felt like she caught Storm in the end. This was a feud that saw Charlotte get the better of things far more often than not and then beat Storm up in the title match. I’m not sure how this helped Storm in almost any way, but it wasn’t exactly a great look for her. I’m almost scared to see what is next for Charlotte, as she is running out of people to beat.

We look back at Drew McIntyre pulling Angela out of the desk after Happy Corbin and Madcap Moss couldn’t make it work.

Drew McIntyre and New Day are ready for the Usos and Madcap Moss tonight. It might even be time for some SEASONS BEATINGS!

Xia Li doesn’t like women like Natalya, who crush other women’s spirits. Violence/vengeance is promised.

Gauntlet Match

It’s a 12 Days Of Christmas Gauntlet Match with the winner getting an Intercontinental Title shot against Shinsuke Nakamura (ringside with Rick Boogs). Angel is in at #1 and Mansoor is in at #2 with the latter being pulled off the top for an early and nasty crash. An enziguri doesn’t get Mansoor very far as Angel hits the Wing Clipper for the pin at 1:36.

Erik is in at #3 and gets kicked off the apron before the bell. Angel tries a moonsault to the floor but gets pulled out of the air. Erik slams him hard on the floor and we take a break. Back with Erik kneeing him in the face for two but missing the running knees in the corner. Another Wing Clipper ends Erik at 6:59 and it’s Shanky in at #4.

A dropkick has no effect on Shanky, who knocks Angel hard into the corner. Wade Barrett’s old Wasteland ends Angel at 8:31 and it’s Ivar in at #5. A big boot drops Ivar but he’s right back up with some corner clotheslines to put Shanky down for a change. The Viking Splash ends Shanky at 9:51 so here is Sheamus in at #6. Sheamus hammers away but gets punched out to the floor as we take another break. Back again with Sheamus grabbing the chinlock to keep Ivar in trouble. That’s broken up with viking power but Sheamus Brogue Kicks him for the pin at 15:50.

Drew Gulak is in at #7 and gets Brogue Kicked for the pin at 16:31. Cesaro is in at #8 with bad ribs but hits a high crossbody for two anyway. That’s a Regal roll onto the ribs and we hit an armbar of all things to keep Cesaro down. Cesaro fights up but it’s a Ridge Holland distraction so Sheamus can hit another Brogue Kick for the pin at 21:18. Ricochet is in at #9 and kicks Sheamus outside for a heck of a top rope Asai moonsault to send us to another break.

Back again with Sheamus hitting the Irish Curse and grabbing a chinlock. Sheamus powerslams him to cut off a comeback attempt, setting up the ten forearms to the chest. A top rope clothesline misses though and Ricochet grabs a tornado DDT for two more. Ricochet’s Lionsault hits knees so Sheamus grabs a small package for a very near fall. Sheamus gets knocked off the top to set up a standing moonsault for two more. Holland offers another distraction though, allowing Sheamus to knee Ricochet off the apron. Cue Cesaro to take out Holland to distract Sheamus, with Ricochet getting the rollup pin at 30:52.

Humberto is in at #10 but first, Sheamus gets to knock Ricochet silly again. Humberto’s moonsault hits raised knees though and it’s the Recoil for the pin at 32.21. Jinder Mahal is in at #11 and drops Ricochet onto the apron toput him in trouble. The Khallas is countered into a cradle to give rid of Mahal at 33:01 though and it’s Sami Zayn in at #12. We take another break and come back with Sami pounding him in the corner and hitting a clothesline for two.

Sami goes up and talks trash, with the delay being enough for Ricochet to snap off a super hurricanrana for two of his own. Ricochet blocks the Blue Thunder Bomb and hits a crossbody for two more. The Blue Thunder Bomb gives Sami a rather near fall but he can’t hit an exploder into the corner. Another attempt does connect but the Helluva Kick is cut off with a superkick. The Benedriller gives Ricochet a very close two so Ricochet heads up top. The shooting star press only hits knees though and it’s a second exploder into the corner. Now Sami can hit the Helluva Kick for the pin and the win at 42:16.

Rating: B-. This was rather long and that’s a good idea on a show like this one. Sami winning wasn’t quite a huge surprise, as he has been quite the focal point of Smackdown for the last few weeks. It wouldn’t surprise me to see him getting the title in the end. Nakamura has done well as champion, but Sami has more of a story going and it would make sense to see him win. The rest of the match had its moments, especially from Ricochet and Sheamus, but a lot of people were in and out without much going on. You have to do something like that in this kind of a match, though it does mean things go rather fast.

We look back at Roman Reigns firing Paul Heyman again.

We get a long, detailed look at Paul Heyman’s career, including a good bit of WCW and ECW footage. After a look at everything that happened to him with Brock Lesnar and Roman Reigns, we wrap it up with the ending of the show’s opening segment, with Heyman saying his career is probably over. This was pretty cool and showed you just how far Heyman has come in his career.

Madcap Moss/Usos vs. Drew McIntyre/New Day

Miracle on 34th Street Fight with Happy Corbin in Moss/Usos’ corner. Woods headlocks Jey to start and then decks him with a forearm. It’s off to Kofi for the slingshot Vader Bomb but he gets taken into the wrong corner. That doesn’t last long though as McIntyre gets the tag so he can hammer on Moss for a bit. Everything breaks down and it’s Corbin coming in with a candy cane kendo stick to drop McIntyre. The other four fight on the stage, with New Day being thrown through boxes and trees.

We take a break and come back with everyone at ringside, including the Usos still using the boxes on New Day. Kofi gets crushed between two trees (Cole: “The old Christmas tree sandwich!”) as Moss stops McIntyre with some raised boots in the corner. McIntyre is back with a suplex as Woods finds a chair in one of the boxes. We go ECW with a Van Daminator to Jimmy but some egg nog seems to slow him down.

That leaves Kofi to Boom Drop Jimmy, followed by a top rope spinning hurricanrana (cool). It’s time to bring in the cookies, which Kofi slams onto the Usos’ heads, because it’s a theme thing. Moss yells at McIntyre so it’s some snap belly to belly suplexes into a neckbreaker for Moss’ troubles. Corbin breaks up the Claymore though so Kofi egg nogs him. McIntyre does the same to Corbin and Moss at the same time, leaving Woods to kick Corbin into the announcers’ table. The Claymore finishes Moss at 12:30.

Rating: C. This is a match where your tolerance for goofy themed comedy will decide everything. Ignoring all that though, this was mainly a not that great six man, with the good guys fighting from underneath to win in the end. That’s not the most thrilling way to wrap it up, but at least McIntyre got to kick Moss in the face. For a fun main event on a less than serious show, not too shabby though.

Post match McIntyre and New Day throw presents into the crowd (McIntyre seems rather proud of one of his throws) to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. The Heyman stuff was excellent and makes me wonder where the story is going. Throw in a good and rather long gauntlet match, a somewhat depressing Women’s Title match and a fun enough main event and we’ll call this a goodish show. It’s definitely a week that seems like they were taking the night off, but at least they did enough good things to carry us to the last week of the year.

Results
Charlotte b. Toni Storm- Small package
Sami Zayn won a gauntlet match last eliminating Ricochet
New Day/Drew McIntyre b. Madcap Moss/Usos – Claymore to Moss

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – December 10, 2021: A Scary Moose Story

Smackdown
Date: December 10, 2021
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

We’re on the way to Day One and that means some more of the show needs to be put together. The main event of Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns for the Universal Title is now set, but we are missing a Jeff Hardy, who was released earlier this week. That could shake things up a bit so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory of Blackjack Lanza.

Here is Sami Zayn, in a wheelchair/leg cast/neck brace, with two male nurses pushing him to the ring. After a video on last week’s big beatdown at the hands of Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar, Sami says he is the toughest man in WWE. Sami talks about how this isn’t necessarily a conspiracy, but he was betrayed last week….and now he has to sue. He promises to sue everyone involved with last week but here is Paul Heyman to interrupt. Heyman: “You’re doing my people’s shtick. My people own entertainment in Hollywood.”

Sami tells him to get out of his camera shot but Heyman shushes him. Heyman keeps going with his usual speech but Sami stands up because he knows Reigns isn’t here tonight. Violence is threatened against Heyman…..and here is Brock Lesnar, meaning it’s time to panic. Lesnar grabs a chair and Heyman is already looking a little nervous. Lesnar sits down in the chair and looks at Zayn, who thinks this is a bit far.

They got off on the wrong foot, with Zayn saying his pain is a ten. Lesnar says he did Sami a favor last week because he was never going to beat Roman Reigns one on one. All he was doing was hurting Zayn so that Reigns’ win wouldn’t really count! Lesnar confirms that Sami is from Montreal and we get a bit of French, which is Lesnar trying to lighten the mood.

Lesnar invites him to Saskatchewan to go hunting or fishing, but Zayn says he’s vegan. That brings Lesnar to his feet and he wheels Zayn towards the ropes. Heyman: “WHAT THE H*** AM I LOOKING AT HERE???” Heyman thinks he spent too much time at the dispensary and the edibles are kicking in (McAfee: “PREACH!”).

Three years ago, this would have been a trip to Suplex City, but instead he’s watching the once and likely future Universal Champion….who beats up the nurses as Heyman bails. Heyman looks pleased as Lesnar throws the wheelchair out of the ring and gives Zayn an F5 (McAfee: “WE NEED ANOTHER NECK BRACE!”). This was a long opening segment to bring the Beast back out, but it makes Lesnar’s laid back attitude a bit more odd as he just shrugged it off and mauled Zayn again.

Post break, Lesnar is asked what that was about. He says to ask his advocate, Paul Heyman.

Shinsuke Nakamura/Rick Boogs vs. Los Lotharios

Boogs Pounces Humberto to start but a cheap shot from Angel….doesn’t do much as Boogs brings him inside as well. There’s a gorilla press toss to send Angel outside but the distraction lets Humberto get in some shots from behind. That doesn’t last long either as Nakamura comes in and hits Kinshasa for the pin at 1:25.

A bunch of wrestlers are gathered around for the unveiling of King Woods’ new crown. Said crown is rather large, but Woods is ready to beat up RKBro and the Usos tonight.

We look back at Drew McIntyre being annoyed that he wasn’t in the #1 contenders battle royal.

Last week, Sonya Deville told Drew McIntyre that Adam Pearce made the list.

This week, Adam Pearce tells Drew McIntyre that Sonya Deville made the list, on orders from a higher authority. Said higher authority also says Drew can’t bring his sword to the ring, so Drew puts the sword into the desk.

Sasha Banks comes up to Toni Storm in the back and tells Storm she has this tonight against Charlotte. Banks praises Storm’s training around the world and tells her not to lose her cool until Charlotte loses hers. Then it’s Toni Time. This was one of those segments depicting two women talking in ways that no humans would never actually talk.

Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre

McIntyre slugs away to start and the brawl is on, with an exchange of hard forearms to the chest. They head outside with McIntyre snapping off an overhead belly to belly as we take a break. Back with Sheamus hitting the Irish Curse for two but McIntyre is back up in a hurry. The Claymore is cut off by a running knee for two and they slow down a bit. They trade headbutts until McIntyre blasts him with the Claymore for the pin at 7:34.

Rating: C+. There is something to be said about having two big power guys hit each other in the face really hard. That’s what we got here, and it’s certainly better than watching McIntyre do the goofy stuff with Happy Corbin and Madcap Moss. This feud might have been more than a few times now, but it still works well in a spot like this one.

In the back, we see Madcap Moss and Happy Corbin stealing Adam Pearce’s desk, still containing the sword.

Video tribute to Blackjack Lanza.

Paul Heyman is leaving when Kayla Braxton interrupts him. Heyman asks her to stop doing that, so Braxton asks about Lesnar calling Heyman his advocate. Heyman asks her to stop doing that too, so Braxton brings up what Roman Reigns will think about the comments. Reality sets in for Heyman in a hurry, as he knows he screwed up.

We recap Naomi vs. Sonya Deville, as Sonya is the latest evil boss.

Sonya Deville vs. Naomi

Naomi tells Sonya to get out here, so here is Sonya, albeit with a few announcements. Natalya is the guest ring announcer and Shayna Baszler is the guest timekeeper. Naomi bails outside to go after both of them to start so Sonya bails before the opening bell. All three get on the apron, so here’s the debuting Xia Li to even things up a bit (complete with blue electric lights coming off of her during the entrance). Naomi and Xia clear the ring but Sonya is pulled out before Naomi can hit the split legged moonsault. No match.

Riddle wants Randy Orton to meet his friends….the cast of Jackass Forever. Riddle is a big fan but Orton has nothing to say.

Charlotte vs. Toni Storm

Non-title but a Champions Contender match. Charlotte punches her down to start so Toni is right back with a basement dropkick. There’s the running hip attack in the corner and a crossbody gives Storm two. Not to be outdone, Charlotte kicks her in the face and Storm is down for a bit. Charlotte goes up for the double moonsault but a bit of mistiming leaves Charlotte trying to cover Storm when she is on her face. The Figure Eight is countered into a small package to give Storm two, followed by a German suplex for the same. Charlotte posts her and takes it to the apron, where Storm is stomped against the post for the DQ at 3:20.

Rating: C-. So yeah, after getting her comeuppance in the form of a pie in the face, Charlotte is right back by beating Storm so much that the referee had to call the match. But hey, at least Storm gets another match where she is probably going to get this close to winning before coming short again. That way we can get back to the important stuff, like Charlotte vs. Banks. Such is WWE, and I can’t even get annoyed anymore.

Post match, Charlotte lays her out AGAIN.

Brock Lesnar comes in to see Adam Pearce, who looks terrified. Lesnar thanks him for the suspension, because he got to score a giant moose when he was out hunting. Lesnar pulls out his flip phone to show Pearce said moose but can’t get it to work. Instead he talks about hanging the moose up on the wall in his cabin and wanted a way to remember things. That’s why he named the moose Pearce.

Usos vs. New Day vs. RKBro

Non-title. New Day double teams Riddle to start and Woods drops a fist for two as the Usos are cool with hanging out on the apron. The Usos come in to clear the ring in a hurry though and we take a break. Back with Woods forearming Jey down to start, allowing Kofi to come in with a high crossbody for two. Riddle tags himself in for the release gutwrench suplex for his own two on Jey.

Jimmy makes a blind tag though and now it’s Riddle getting double teamed. Orton breaks that up in a hurry but Jey cuts Riddle off in a hurry. The chinlock goes on but Jey spends too much time posing, allowing Riddle to avoid a corner splash. The tag is loaded up….but Jimmy pulls Orton off the apron. New Day has to make a save of their own and we take a break.

Back with Kofi cutting off a tag attempt so Riddle stays in trouble. Woods grabs a suplex for two and the chinlock goes on again. The fans want Orton but get Woods elbowing Riddle in the back of the head instead. Riddle strikes away at New Day and that’s enough for the hot tag to Orton. House is cleaned in a hurry, including the hanging DDT to Jey. The RKO is broken up but Jey can’t hit the Superfly Splash. Woods tags himself in as Orton hits the RKO on Jimmy. Jey superkicks Orton but gets superkicked by Woods, setting up Daybreak for the pin at 18:54.

Rating: B-. That was the least surprising ending I can remember in a very long time, as it would be the most WWE ending possible. Sure New Day doesn’t have a title of their own, but they get to be the best team in the world. That’s one of the many reasons why WWE is in the state that it is in today, and the fact that you could guess the ending as soon as the match was announced makes it even worse.

Overall Rating: C+. Pretty good show this week, though there were more than a few moments where I rolled my eyes at some of the dumber things they were doing (New Day winning, Charlotte leaving Storm laying). Lesnar smashing Zayn was good and Heyman was great as always though and Xia Li’s debut worked. There were enough positives this week, but there were also enough moments that left me skeptical about the future, as tends to be the case in WWE.

Results
Shinsuke Nakamura/Rick Boogs b. Los Lotharios – Kinshasa to Humberto
Drew McIntyre b. Sheamus – Claymore
Toni Storm b. Charlotte via DQ when Charlotte would not stop attacking Storm in the ropes
New Day b. Usos and RKBro – Daybreak to Jey

 

 

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Smackdown – December 3, 2021: Why Should He Be Afraid?

Smackdown
Date: December 3, 2021
Location: AT&T Center, San Antonio, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

In something you probably don’t remember hearing around here, it’s the Brock Lesnar Show as he is back after his suspension last month. Odds are this is going to set something up for either Day 1 or the Rumble and that opens up a few questions. I’m curious to see where this is going so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Sami Zayn becoming #1 contender last week but Brock Lesnar’s return was announced for the show immediately thereafter.

Here is Brock Lesnar to get things going. Lesnar says he is here for the Universal Title but cue Sami Zayn to interrupt. Sami talks about how he’s a fan of Lesnar and is cut off almost immediately. Lesnar: “I’m sorry, you’re a fan?” Lesnar talks about living in Saskatchewan, where he hunts, kills and eats things. Now why hasn’t he ripped Sami’s head off yet? Sami explains the battle royal win….and Lesnar starts laughing.

Sami says it might be funny and Lesnar wants to see the title match tonight. Lesnar: “Sami right? Tonight! Sami Zayn vs. Roman Reigns!” Sami says he didn’t want to do it in Texas and he has a bad hip but Brock doesn’t want to hear this. Brock backs the babbling Sami up against the ropes and twists his arm until Sami agrees to the match. Lesnar will be there too! Crazy scary Lesnar who isn’t worried about anyone is great.

Post break, Sami is with Sonya Deville and tries to talk his way out of the Roman Reigns match. Brock comes up and Sami changes his tune, with Sonya making the match. Lesnar even gets to face the winner at Day 1!

Video on Shayna Baszler, including the stomp to mess up Nia Jax’s arm. After the video, McAfee refers to this as the Future Endeavors Kick.

Sasha Banks vs. Shayna Baszler

Baszler is sent outside to start, where she counters a baseball slide into an ankle lock. Banks breaks that up and hits the Meteora off the apron for two as we take a break. Back with Baszler hitting a running knee in the corner, setting up a gutwrench suplex for two. Banks fights up and hits a springboard tornado DDT for two of her own. Baszler pulls her down into the Kirifuda Clutch but Banks flips out and grabs the Bank Statement. That’s broken up as well so Baszler hits a running knee, only to get caught in a hurricanrana for the pin at 8:49.

Rating: C. You knew it was happening as soon as the Baszler video aired. I’m not sure what the point of this one was other than getting Sasha a win, though there is no reason to get annoyed at WWE for having Baszler lose again. Baszler has long since reached the point of “it’s not going to happen” so this is about all you could have expected.

Adam Pearce calls Sonya Deville and says he isn’t going to show up because it would be better if he just remembers the Alamo. Deville: “Oh come on.” Drew McIntyre comes in and doesn’t like that it was Adam Pearce’s decision for him to not be in the battle royal last week.

It’s time for Happy Talk, with Happy Corbin in shorts to show off his rather tattooed legs. Corbin and Madcap Moss talk about last week’s battle royal, including Moss eliminating a bunch of people until Corbin tossed him out as well. Jeff Hardy did some stupid things and Drew McIntyre didn’t even get in the match. Cue McIntyre, with Angela the sword, allowing Hardy to jump Corbin from behind. Hardy and McIntyre steal their hats.

Xia Li debuts next week so we get another comic book video. This one talks about her walking through a quiet street until she has to beat up some muggers.

Viking Raiders vs. Los Lotharios

Erik plants Angel in a hurry and them knocks Humberto off the apron. Ivar gets knocked off the apron though and it’s a Muta Lock to Erick….and we pause for a good while until Rick Boogs can show up on the announcers’ table. This time though, Humberto is fine enough to roll Erik up for the pin at 1:41 anyway. Ok points for a surprise twist.

Post match the Vikings are mad at Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura but the power of rock calms things down.

We look at Toni Storm getting pied into fear by Charlotte last week.

Storm says she wants a title shot and doesn’t care how much Charlotte embarrasses her. All she wants is the title.

Jey Uso vs. King Woods

Before the match, the Usos call out Sami Zayn and Brock Lesnar for wanting to face Roman Reigns at Day 1. Woods cuts them off and brings out the returning Kofi Kingston to have his back. Jey hammers him in the corner to start but misses a running hip attack. Back up and Woods kicks him in the face but Jimmy interferes for the DQ at 2:02.

Post match Kofi helps Woods clear the ring.

Roman Reigns isn’t happy with everything happening tonight without his knowledge. Paul Heyman insists he didn’t know any of this would be happening, but Reigns promises to smash Sami Zayn and Brock Lesnar.

The New Day, with Aliyah for a bit for her latest random cameo, is ready to win the Tag Team Titles from the Usos at Day 1.

Here is Charlotte to respond to Toni Storm’s challenges. The point is that #1 doesn’t acknowledge #2, but she’ll get to the point: no. Charlotte leaves and Storm is waiting on her with a pie.

Video on Ricochet.

Sheamus vs. Cesaro

Sheamus sends him straight to the apron for the ten forearms to the chest and an early near fall. The double fish hook stretches Cesaro’s face but he fights up and knocks Sheamus over the barricade. Back in and Sheamus drives some knees to the head while shouting about how much better Ridge Holland is than Cesaro. That starts a comeback….and it’s cut off by the Brogue Kick to give Sheamus the pin at 3:47.

Rating: C. Can they please just release Cesaro already? They aren’t going to push him, they aren’t going to give him anything to do and they don’t see much in him. If they’re that sure he isn’t a star, why keep him on the payroll? I know the answer to most of these questions is AEW, but egads it’s frustrating to watch something like this after his token pay per view main event earlier this year.

Naomi challenges Sonya Deville again and Sonya accepts. The catch is Naomi can’t touch her until they’re in the ring, so Sonya hits her in the face and doesn’t give her a date for the match.

Universal Title: Roman Reigns vs. Sami Zayn

Sami is challenging but first he needs to rant about no one having his back for years. Cue Brock Lesnar so Sami keeps talking about how he’s going to win the title. Brock snaps off the German suplexes into the F5 and Sami is left laying. Another F5 makes it even worse and Lesnar puts Sami in the corner, despite him being out on his feet. Lesnar leaves and post break, Reigns comes out for the match. The Usos are here with Reigns and pull Sami back up so the bell can ring. Spear and guillotine retain the title at 16 seconds to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. I wasn’t exactly feeling this one as it was much more about setting things up for Day 1 rather than anything of note here. It wasn’t terrible or even that bad, but it’s a show where you would have been better off reading a recap than watching the show. At least they accomplished something, but don’t waste your time with anything on this show, save for maybe Lesnar having fun getting a fat check.

Results
Sasha Banks b. Shayna Baszler – Hurricanrana
Los Lotharios b. Viking Raiders – Rollup to Erik
King Woods b. Jey Uso via DQ when Jimmy Uso interfered
Sheamus b. Cesaro – Brogue Kick
Roman Reigns b. Sami Zayn – Guillotine

 

 

 

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Smackdown – November 26, 2021: Warmed Over Leftovers

Smackdown
Date: November 26, 2021
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

We’re done with Survivor Series, where a grand total of very little took place. Raw won the Battle For Brand Supremacy but Roman Reigns beat Big E. in the show’s main event. We are now on the way to Day 1 and Reigns’ next challenger will be determined this week via a battle royal. Let’s get to it.

Here is Survivor Series if you need a recap.

Kayla Braxton is in the ring to talk about Brock Lesnar’s suspension but here are Paul Heyman and Roman Reigns to interrupt. Heyman says we don’t deal with rumors like this one on the Island of Relevancy. The fans aren’t pleased but Heyman tells them to stop booing Braxton. He wants Braxton to go get some sources and find some real news. Stop living through an Instagram filter because there is no real journalist filter. Braxton is allowed to leave so the fans want Brock. McAfee: “Did they say let’s go……Brandon?”

Reigns says the problem with rumors is they give losers false hope. Compared to him, everyone around here is a loser. He has beaten everyone around here and Brock is the biggest loser of them all. After Survivor Series, Big E. is a loser too and it’s getting embarrassing around here. Tonight we have a Black Friday Battle Royal to crown a new #1 contender. Why not let three or four of them win tonight because he can smash them all? When his days are done around here, which could be sooner than later, the world will acknowledge him.

We recap Drew McIntyre helping Jeff Hardy last week vs. Happy Corbin/Madcap Moss.

Happy Corbin/Madcap Moss vs. Drew McIntyre/Jeff Hardy

Corbin jumps Hardy to start and gets atomic dropped into the basement dropkick. Moss comes in and gets elbowed in the face to give McIntyre two. The fans are very pleased with Hardy as he comes back in to work on Moss’ arm. Moss is sent outside and Hardy dives off the apron to hit Corbin as well. A clothesline puts Hardy into the timekeeper’s area though and we take a break.

Back with Corbin throwing Hardy into the corner but he’s back up with a double clothesline to put himself and Moss down. The hot tag brings in McIntyre, who cuts off the slide under the ropes clothesline. Moss’ interference lets Corbin grab Deep Six for two and everything breaks down. The Glasgow Kiss drops Moss into the Claymore into the Swanton to give Hardy the pin at 8:25.

Rating: C. Perfectly watchable tag match here and the hometown star even gets to win for a change. It was a simple match that played off of last week’s stuff and gave the fans something to cheer about. Again: WWE knows how to do this kind of thing and a (fairly long) string of matches like these could do a lot of good for restoring some fan confidence.

Aliyah and Kayla Braxton are chatting but Paul Heyman comes in to scare Aliyah off. Heyman asks if Braxton has any confirmations yet, before saying that Reigns isn’t scared of Lesnar. If she doesn’t have a confirmation by the end of the night, he’s pushing to get rid of her. Or is that just a rumor?

Cesaro vs. Ridge Holland

Sheamus is on commentary to sing Holland’s praises. Holland runs Cesaro over to start and grabs an early chinlock. That’s broken up so Holland busts out a heck of an overhead belly to belly for two. A powerslam drops Cesaro again for no cover as Holland would rather elbow him in the face a few times. Holland pauses for a second though and gets rolled up for the pin at 2:48.

Drew McIntyre says he wants in the battle royal but Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville don’t have a final lineup yet.

Rick Boogs vs. Angel

This is billed as a Thanksgiving Leftovers Throwdown. McAfee: “THINGS ARE MESSY IN MY PANTS RIGHT NOW!” There are a bunch of Thanksgiving leftovers around the ring and Boogs teases putting Angle through a table of them to start. That’s broken up and we hit the crossarm choke back inside. Boogs powers up and busts out a heck of a gutwrench suplex. Humberto has to be dealt with and it’s a gutwrench powerbomb for two on Angel. Humberto grabs the guitar but Shinsuke Nakamura puts him through the table. The distraction lets Angel hit a superkick into the Wing Clipper for the pin at 3:12.

Rating: C-. This was a bit messy, but the weirder part is that they didn’t even bother with the Thanksgiving stuff. What is the point in having it out there if you could have the same match without the stuff included? Boogs losing to Angel isn’t a terrible thing, and should lead to a big tag match, or maybe an Intercontinental Title match.

Video on Becky Lynch cheating to beat Charlotte at Survivor Series.

Kayla Braxton asks Adam Pearce about Brock Lesnar’s suspension, and happens to have a clip of Lesnar attacking Pearce ready. Pearce isn’t happy and says Lesnar’s suspension isn’t being lifted anytime soon.

Here is Charlotte for a chat. Charlotte says Becky Lynch had to cheat to beat her because Charlotte is the better woman. Cue Toni Storm to say she’s stepping up to Charlotte before Charlotte has the chance to come after her. Charlotte isn’t pleased and offers to beat Storm up right now. The brawl is on and Charlotte is sent outside, where she grabs a leftover pie to knock Storm down. Then Charlotte does it again for a bonus, with Storm….just standing there and looking at her. And yes, that’s the whole segment: Storm interrupts, gets pied twice, and does absolutely nothing.

Earlier today, Sasha Banks blamed Sonya Deville for costing them the Survivor Series match for not putting Naomi on the team. Deville doesn’t like that but Banks suggests that Deville is jealous. All Deville is now is a suit, which Deville says makes her the boss. Deville makes a tag match.

Xia Li is still coming soon.

Sasha Banks/Naomi vs. Natalya/Shayna Baszler

Sonya Deville is on commentary. Baszler goes with an early ankle lock on Banks but the Kirifuda Clutch is backed into the corner. Naomi comes in but gets taken to the floor, where Natalya gives her the release atomic drop. Back in and Banks has to break up the Kirifuda Clutch with a Backstabber to Baszler as we take a break.

Back with Baszler knocking Banks off the apron again and cranking on Naomi’s leg. A double suplex puts Naomi down and Natalya grabs a chinlock. That’s broken up and Naomi flips out of a suplex but Natalya pulls her back down. The discus lariat gives Natalya two and a Michinoku Driver is good for the same. Back up and Naomi grabs a quick rollup for the pin at 10:16.

Rating: C. Banks kind of disappeared near the end, but this wasn’t about her anyway. I’m glad to see Naomi actually win something for once to get one up on Deville as their eventual showdown continues to loom. Overcoming the odds is the point to one of these evil bosses stories so this was a good way to move things forward.

Deville reluctantly applauds the winners.

The lineup has been released for the battle royal…but Drew McIntyre didn’t make it. Sneering ensues.

Raw Rebound.

Battle Royal

Ivar, Erik, Sheamus, Sami Zayn, Drew Gulak, Ricochet, Jinder Mahal, Humberto, Angel, Cesaro, Happy Corbin, Shaky, Mace, Rick Boogs, Mansoor, Madcap Moss, Ridge Holland, Jeff Hardy

Hold on though as here is Drew McIntyre with the sword to chase everyone off. Adam Pearce comes out to try and calm things down as we take a break. We come back with things having started and the Bloodline watching in the back. Mahal is out early and Sami kicks Gulak out. Sheamus and Holland knockout Mansoor and there goes Mace. Moss manages to get rid of Shanky and Cesaro dumps Holland, only to get tossed by Moss as well.

Corbin doesn’t seem to notice Moss’ success, but Moss tries to toss him instead. That’s fine with Corbin, who eliminates Moss instead. We take a break and come back with more halfhearted elimination attempts. Sheamus punches Zayn to the apron and Angel tosses Boogs. The Vikings get rid of Angel and Humberto and Zayn goes through the ropes (not out) to the floor. Sheamus gets beaten up by the Vikings as well but he manages to send both of them out. We’re down to Ricochet, Sheamus, Hardy, Corbin and Zayn as Ricochet hits a springboard crossbody to drop Sheamus.

A rolling dropkick hits Hardy but Corbin clotheslines Ricochet. There’s a chokebreaker to drop Ricochet again but he comes back with an enziguri. Sheamus Brogue Kicks Ricochet though and he’s out without much trouble. Corbin and Sheamus slug it out but Hardy is back up to catch Corbin with a Twisting Stunner. Sheamus is back up to help Corbin go after Hardy but Corbin turns on him for the elimination. Hardy tosses Sheamus….and forgets that Zayn is still in and gets eliminated to give Sami the win at 19:43.

Rating: C. It was a battle royal with the most annoying ending possible and the hometown star slipping on a banana peel to lose in the end. The “hey he’s still in” finish is one of the most overdone concepts that WWE loves to use and you could see it a mile away here. Zayn winning is interesting, but I wouldn’t be surprised to see something take that title shot away.

Roman Reigns is rather pleased in the back.

Kayla Braxton gets in the ring to interview Sami but we have BREAKING NEWS: Brock Lesnar’s suspension has been lifted and he will be back next week. Now Reigns isn’t pleased to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This certainly wasn’t a great show but they did enough to make things work. I would still expect King Woods to wind up getting the next major Universal Title shot but they still have tome to get there. At least some things were moved forward here and it was a more interesting show with the Survivor Series stuff out of the way.

Results
Drew McIntyre/Jeff Hardy b. Happy Corbin/Madcap Moss – Swanton Bomb to Moss
Cesaro b. Ridge Holland – Rollup
Angel b. Rick Boogs – Wing Clipper
Naomi/Sasha Banks b. Natalya/Shayna Baszler – Rollup to Natalya
Sami Zayn won a battle royal last eliminating Jeff Hardy

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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