Today it’s the former Chosen One, Drew McIntyre.

Drew got his start in 2001 and would stay in Europe for several years. The video of that era is hard to find but I do have this match from July 1, 2006.

IWW Title: Sheamus O’Shaunessy vs. Drew Galloway

Sheamus is defending and is the huge face here in Ireland. He looks FAR more like he does now with trunks instead of shorts, a mustache and short hair. Coming out to rap music is very strange though. Sheamus shoves him around to start and Galloway is quickly sent to the floor. Back in and Drew grabs a headlock but Sheamus counters into one of his own and takes him down to the mat. One sided so far.

Off to a front facelock as Thee (doesn’t work when the commentator says it either) and right back to the headlock. Drew comes back with some forearms and backdrops Sheamus out to the floor. Back in and Drew puts on something resembling a Sharpshooter but instead of pulling on the legs he leans back and pulls on Sheamus’ arms. The hold doesn’t stay long and Drew drops a knee on the arm. Sheamus comes right back with a German suplex but can’t follow up. Drew misses a middle rope legdrop and it’s Sheamus with a backbreaker into a fallaway slam. There’s the Death Valley Driver but Charlie Rage comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C. I can see why these two would have some solid matches if they had more time and a better story. Sheamus was starting to round into form here with the power game but he wasn’t quite to the level he would reach yet. Galloway is the kind of guy that would have been a big deal if he wasn’t crushed all the time, but that’s what nasty divorces do for you.

Drew would head to WWE in 2007 and make a one off appearance on Smackdown on October 12, 2007.

Drew McIntyre vs. Brett Major

It’s Zack Ryder. Drew comes out to what would become William Regal’s music and is in a blue kilt. An insert interview says Drew is applying for dual citizenship and wants to hear a USA chant tonight. That’s an interesting idea. The USA chant starts up as Drew takes him into the corner but gets flipped down by a wristlock. Drew sends him into the buckle and puts on a chinlock but the yet to be named Rough Ryder puts him down for two. A bad looking dropkick gets the same on Drew but his mentor Dave Taylor gets in a cheap shot, knocking Major into a rollup for the pin.

That would be it for Drew for a few years on the main show as he would hit developmental for awhile. One of those matches was in February 2008 on OVW TV against perennial loser Johnny Punch. It’s the only OVW match I can find.

Drew McIntyre vs. Johnny Punch

Punch has lost 123 matches in a row. A big backdrop and some clotheslines send Punch into the corner to hide, but Drew misses a charge and knocks himself out. Johnny drops a splash and ends the losing streak in less than two minutes.

Here’s a match from the other developmental promotion (FCW) on November 15, 2008.

Drew McIntyre vs. Johnny Curtis

Curtis is currently known as Fandango. Drew is still in his kilt and kicks Curtis in the face for two. Curtis goes after the arm and takes McIntyre down for two. Some armdrags send Drew to the floor as Dusty and Josh talk about what the nationality of those armdrags. Drew catches Johnny diving off the apron with a right hand for two back inside. We hit the chinlock as Curtis is busted open and Dusty plugs the live experience of the FCW tapings.

The Scot takes off the turnbuckle pad and takes out Curtis’ leg before missing a legdrop. It doesn’t seem to matter as Drew puts on a quickly broken chinlock and gets taken down by a clothesline. A Russian legsweep gets two but the referee stops to look at the exposed buckle. The pad comes off again and Drew hits him with the tag rope for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Not a bad match but it’s clear that Curtis needs an over the top gimmick because without one he’s as dull as a WWE developmental stereotype. Drew was better but he also needs something besides “I’m Scottish”. The wrestling wasn’t bad but there’s almost nothing of interest in this at all.

Drew would become FCW Champion soon after this and defend the title against DH Smith on May 24, 2009.

FCW Title: Drew McIntyre vs. DH Smith

The ring announcer is the future downfall of McIntyre’s career Tiffany. Drew is now looking like he would in WWE, with his hair pulled back and in regular trunks. Feeling out process to start with the challenger cranking on the arm but Drew counters into a wristlock of his own. Some forearms to the back have DH in trouble but he comes right back with an armbar of his own.

Drew misses a big clothesline and Smith grabs the other arm for a cross armbreaker in a really nice counter. Why didn’t we see that in WWE? McIntyre blocks most of the pressure but eventually has to get to the ropes. He taps anyway but it doesn’t count due to the ropes. That’s a good clarification to get. We take a break and come back with Drew holding a chinlock. Back up and DH whips him hard into the buckle before winning a slugout.

A northern lights suplex gets two on McIntyre but he comes back with a big boot for two. Smith backdrops out of a Future Shock attempt before getting two off a butterfly suplex. Drew comes back with a DDT for the same and goes up, only to be slammed down to put both guys on the mat. Smith rolls over for a delayed two before they trade near falls. Both guys try cross bodies to put themselves down again. They slug it out with Smith nailing a powerbomb for two, only to get caught in a Scot Drop (Downward spiral) out of nowhere to retain the title.

Rating: B-. I was digging this even though Smith didn’t seem to have much of a chance. I’m not sure what his finisher was other than maybe that armbreaker but he never went back to it after making Drew tap. McIntyre still needed some adjustments but he was getting better and more polished at this point.

The polishing would be good enough to get Drew an Intercontinental Title shot at TLC 2009.

Intercontinental Title: Drew McIntyre vs. John Morrison

McIntyre was somehow more bland here than he is now if you can believe that. He doesn’t have the sweet entrance yet either. Morrison gets the preteen girl pop. The slow-mo entrance is cool no matter what people say. Striker says it’s been 20 years since there had been a new IC Champion in Texas. That’s so wrong I don’t know where to start. We’ll ignore Rey at Mania 25 right?

Drew is dominating the early parts of the match so far which is expected. This is a far more traditional match than the previous one which comes off as a nice change of pace to me. McIntyre hits a reverse Alabama Slam. I like that. Striker calls it an Alabama Jam, which was Bobby Eaton’s top rope legdrop so that’s just wrong. We’re on the floor now as this has been a pretty decent match. Starship Pain kind of hits.

Cole and Striker actually aren’t sure if it did or not. That’s not a good sign at all. Drew’s foot is under the rope though so there you are. Striker cites the official’s handbook. I want to read that someday. Could be fun. Drew has a foreign object which makes sense for him and the double arm DDT ends Morrison’s reign.

Rating: B-. Solid stuff here. I liked McIntyre more because of this match as Morrison looked good in a loss which is all you can ask of him. I like the double arm DDT as it’s Foley’s move which makes it awesome. Morrison would be in a main event in two months so what more can you ask for?

Drew’s roll would continue to Wrestlemania where he would be part of the Money in the Bank match.

Kofi Kingston vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne vs. Jack Swagger vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Matt Hardy vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Kane vs. Christian

Kane has a BIG black eye for reasons never explained. Remember when I said eight man matches were too busy? Well here’s a TEN man version. It’s a big brawl to start until MVP throws in the first ladder. Drew tries to go up but gets shoved over by Matt. MVP hits a big running boot to knock Drew to the floor. Nine people fight for two sides of a ladder to climb but Kane cleans house and sends about five guys to the floor.

Christian and Matt go up but Kofi (in the rare white trunks) makes the save. Ziggler hits a kind of Zig Zag off the ladder to Christian but Kane and MVP get back inside. Things are already really congested here. Kane is put into the corner and has a ladder rammed into his ribs. Kofi stumbles up the ladder and falls onto the steel. Shelton comes in with Paydirt to MVP and loads up the big ladder, only to be stabbed with a ladder by Swagger. Jack winds up inside the ladder and gets speared from either side with the tops of ladders between the rungs of the big ladder by Christian and Matt.

Now the ladders Matt and Christian used are bridged across the top rope like a big cross kind of thing. Matt and Christian climb up while Bourne climbs up the side of the ladder. The ladder Matt is standing on falls out and Bourne kicks Christian down, but instead of GETTING THE CASE, Evan hits the Shooting Star on Christian. Now Matt stops Bourne but Swagger comes up and throws Matt onto the other bridged ladder, leaving everyone down.

MVP and Shelton go up but a rana by Benjamin send both guys out to the floor. Kane is the first person back inside but Ziggler makes the stop. He actually climbs over Kane but the big man shoves the ladder over to make the stop. A chokeslam onto the ladder has Dolph in trouble, much like Kane actually slamming the ladder onto Ziggler so hard he BREAKS THE LADDER. In the creative spot of the night, Kofi picks up the two broken pieces and walks on the like stilts.

McIntyre finally makes the save and brings the big ladder back inside. Hardy finally makes the save by shoving Drew off the ladder and onto the top rope for a big crotching. Matt is alone but can’t quite pull the thing down. Christian and Kane join him on top and it’s the big bald being shoved down. Christian hits the reverse DDT (called the Twist of Fate by that schnook Cole) and here’s Swagger back inside. It’s Swagger and Christian on top and a case to the head allows Swagger to (FINALLY as it takes forever) pull down the case to win.

Rating: B-. WAY too many people in there which led to way too much laying around. It’s not a terrible match or anything, but these are getting weaker and weaker as they keep going. Kofi’s stilts spot was great but other than that there’s nothing to see here. We’ve seen these same spots so many times now and they’re getting repetitive, making them weaker every time.

After losing the title, one of Drew’s first feuds was with Matt Hardy. Here’s one of their matches from Smackdown on August 13, 2010.

Kofi Kingston vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne vs. Jack Swagger vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Matt Hardy vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Kane vs. Christian

Kane has a BIG black eye for reasons never explained. Remember when I said eight man matches were too busy? Well here’s a TEN man version. It’s a big brawl to start until MVP throws in the first ladder. Drew tries to go up but gets shoved over by Matt. MVP hits a big running boot to knock Drew to the floor. Nine people fight for two sides of a ladder to climb but Kane cleans house and sends about five guys to the floor.

Christian and Matt go up but Kofi (in the rare white trunks) makes the save. Ziggler hits a kind of Zig Zag off the ladder to Christian but Kane and MVP get back inside. Things are already really congested here. Kane is put into the corner and has a ladder rammed into his ribs. Kofi stumbles up the ladder and falls onto the steel. Shelton comes in with Paydirt to MVP and loads up the big ladder, only to be stabbed with a ladder by Swagger. Jack winds up inside the ladder and gets speared from either side with the tops of ladders between the rungs of the big ladder by Christian and Matt.

Now the ladders Matt and Christian used are bridged across the top rope like a big cross kind of thing. Matt and Christian climb up while Bourne climbs up the side of the ladder. The ladder Matt is standing on falls out and Bourne kicks Christian down, but instead of GETTING THE CASE, Evan hits the Shooting Star on Christian. Now Matt stops Bourne but Swagger comes up and throws Matt onto the other bridged ladder, leaving everyone down.

MVP and Shelton go up but a rana by Benjamin send both guys out to the floor. Kane is the first person back inside but Ziggler makes the stop. He actually climbs over Kane but the big man shoves the ladder over to make the stop. A chokeslam onto the ladder has Dolph in trouble, much like Kane actually slamming the ladder onto Ziggler so hard he BREAKS THE LADDER. In the creative spot of the night, Kofi picks up the two broken pieces and walks on the like stilts.

McIntyre finally makes the save and brings the big ladder back inside. Hardy finally makes the save by shoving Drew off the ladder and onto the top rope for a big crotching. Matt is alone but can’t quite pull the thing down. Christian and Kane join him on top and it’s the big bald being shoved down. Christian hits the reverse DDT (called the Twist of Fate by that schnook Cole) and here’s Swagger back inside. It’s Swagger and Christian on top and a case to the head allows Swagger to (FINALLY as it takes forever) pull down the case to win.

Rating: B-. WAY too many people in there which led to way too much laying around. It’s not a terrible match or anything, but these are getting weaker and weaker as they keep going. Kofi’s stilts spot was great but other than that there’s nothing to see here. We’ve seen these same spots so many times now and they’re getting repetitive, making them weaker every time.

With nothing else to do, Drew would team up with Cody Rhodes for tag team turmoil at Night of Champions 2010.

Tag Team Turmoil

We open with Hart Dynasty vs. Usos. Yeah because we haven’t seen this enough. Striker mentions playing a game called Six Degrees of the Hart Dungeon, which sounds AWESOME to a wrestling geek like me. DAVID HITS A BIG BOOT IN THE CORNER! Kidd hits a big Asai moonsault to the floor. Kidd gets the Sharpshooter but the other Uso hits a BIG BOOT to end him, guaranteeing new champions.

Kozlov/Santino vs. Usos now. This lasts about a minute as Santino sets for the cobra but Tamina distracts him, allowing a Samoan Drop (shocking right?) to end him.

Bourne/Henry in next. This shows how sad the tag division is. It truly does. Henry comes in and cleans house with the World’s Strongest Slam. Air Bourne ends it.

Final team is Drew/Cody. Ok we HAVE to have the heels win it here for the sake of sanity. Also so we can hear either awesome theme song. The heels dominate for awhile as Bourne plays Ricky Morton for awhile. They say Cody was a tag team champion but never say with who. I don’t get why though.

Big gutbuster by Drew as Bourne is in trouble, hence the Morton thing I guess. Drew CRANKS on a chinlock which looks awesome. Bourne gets out of a suplex using the ultimate counter: kicking his feet. Hot tag to Henry and Cody trips coming through the ropes. They go for the Super Shooting Star which takes forever so Cross Roads takes out Bourne (illegal man) for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. These are hard to grade but given who was in this the booking more or less was terrible. No Gatecrashers or Dudebusters or Nexus but Bourne and Henry? Really? The one good thing here is that they beat the champions clean the other night. That’s a major plus for them so there’s no argument that they didn’t beat the champions. Not wild AT ALL on having another randon team thrown together but that’s the nature of the beast in modern tag wrestling I guess. Pretty bad though and definitely the worst of the night so far.

They would lose the titles soon after this and Drew would be back to a singles run. This got him into the Elimination Chamber at its namesake show in 2011.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Kane vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Wade Barrett vs. ???

Remember that we have an extra spot open in the Chamber due to Dolph having been fired. Kane comes out first and therefore is in a pod to start. Drew is out second and therefore will be in a pod as well. Thankfully he’s rocking the white tights. The first four will be in pods which means we get to see who the final guy is rather soon. Barrett is in third. We hear about his bare knuckle fighting experience which makes me ask again: has he ever used said skills to win a match? Also Cole thinks Barrett is from Eastern Europe instead of Western.

Here’s Teddy Long when we’re ready for the fourth person. He’s here to introduce the next participant I guess. Here’s the replacement: It’s Big Show which is kind of what I expected when he came out there. Rey vs. Edge to start. Five minute periods as always with the last man standing winning. Every five minutes another comes in. Edge and Rey start off kind of slow which makes perfect sense as they want to maintain energy.

Edge sends Rey out to the steel for the first time with a backdrop. Drew is all ticked off and hammers on the glass as he wants to get to Edge as fast as possible. Edge and Rey fights on the outside with Rey being rammed into the cage multiple times. Rey gets rammed into the glass which is “the strongest in the world” which gets two. We’re more or less just killing time here and there’s the ten second clock.

In third it’s Barrett. He’s all fired up and goes after Rey immediately. Edge gets up to slow down the Englishman. Edge and Rey work together until Edge slides Rey across the mat and cage so that his head rams into the wall. FREAKING OW MAN! Boss Man Slam to Edge gets two and Barrett turns his attention to Rey after taunting Show. Pumphandle slam gets two.

Barrett is dominating here and we’re out on the steel again. A shot to the cage with Edge’s head going into it gets two. Edge low bridges Barrett and Wade might have hurt his knee. Rey takes down Edge but as he goes up Barrett stops him. Wasteland on the cage is countered as Rey grabs the cage. He tries to climb but Barrett catches him in a powerbomb position. Rana takes Barrett into the ring but Edge gets a big boot to stop the 619 for two. Again, why would you stop a finisher?

In fourth is Kane. He goes straight for Edge but gets caught by a boot. Kane cleans house, beating everyone in sight down. Everyone wakes up and gangs up on Kane as they should. A bunch of kicks to the head can’t stop him so we get a triple clothesline with Barrett clotheslining Edge and Rey and vice versa. We get some basic stuff and Barrett gets beaten down by Kane outside.

Rey tries to go up to take down Kane but a HUGE uppercut knocks Rey down into a Tree of Woe. Edge adds a baseball slide for two. Kane, Edge and Rey in the ring now while Barrett is slowly crawling back in. In at #5 is McIntyre. No eliminations yet. Drew has been wanting in the whole time and immediately picks up Rey and launches him into the glass. The Europeans beat up Kane, who actually is European as well so scratch that theory. Drew kicks the rope as Barret gets in and then throws him through the UNBREAKABLE glass. That’s a running joke now and it’s never been funny.

Drew is all ticked off and goes after Edge. All Drew here as he can’t get Futureshock on Edge but Edge hits Edgecution for no cover. Rey is somehow still alive as Edge is trying to get up. Edge wants the spear but Kane grabs him in a chokeslam. Rey is back in too but can’t hit the 619. Kane beats everyone down and slams Rey into the post. Drew can’t get Futureshock again as Kane backdrops him onto Barrett outside.

Edge and Kane hit double big boots to take each other down. That replay of Rey being thrown in awesome as it’s amazing he’s still alive. Show is getting ready as we’re under ten seconds. Naturally he takes down everyone. Barrett is the only one not in other than kind of Rey. HUGE chop to Drew. Barrett is the only one left standing other than Show and the stalking begins.

Show gets his hand on Barrett and chops away like 8 times on the outside. Barrett rolls back into the ring and it’s all Show. Big punch coming and Barrett is more or less dead and the pin is academic. We’re down to five and Rey is on top of a pod. Kane hits the top rope clothesline. Edge adds a top rope elbow for two as Show launches Edge over the referee. Futureshock to Show as Rey is still up there. The DDT gets two as Rey is ready to jump. Huge seated senton gets two as Rey is LAUNCHED.

619 and a spear put Show down but Kane fights them off. Chokeslam to Show and we’re down to four (Kane, Drew, Edge and Rey if you’re curious). Drew jumps into a chokeslam immediately and we’re down to three. It’s more or less a handicap match here but Edge is taken down. Rey hits a bunch of stuff on Kane but he can’t get the pin. Spinning cross body is caught in a chokeslam position but he reverses into the 619. Rey goes up and jumps into a powerbomb. Spear from Edge and a double cover is enough to take Kane out and we’re down to Rey vs. Edge.

Kane kills Edge with a big boot and a chokeslam to Edge has both guys down. After them laying there for a good while, Edge gets up and tries the spear but Rey reverses into a rollup for two. Springboard cross body is rolled through into two for Edge. Sitout bulldog gets two. Rey goes up but gets stopped by a shot from the Canadian. Mysterio knocks Edge down and tries a rana but Edge reverses into a sitout powerbomb for a long two.

Another powerbomb is countered into the 619 but Edge catches it and locks on the Edgecator of all things (kneeling Sharpshooter that he uses once in a blue moon). Rey is in trouble but reverses into a rollup for two. Good stuff here. Edge sets for the spear and the fans are booing a bit. Spear misses but the second one doesn’t and it’s NOT OVER. Rey kicks out again which is as surprising as something very surprising. 619 hits and the springboard splash gets two. Another 619 hits and Rey goes up. Edge pops up and spears him out of the air to go to Wrestlemania FINALLY.

Rating: A. GREAT match here with Edge vs. Rey being the highlight. I would say the ending was predictable but still, the ending sequence with all the kickouts was so good that it’s more than ok. I don’t like Rey but he was great here. I loved all the aggression in there with everyone destroying each other all night long. Great stuff here and one of the better Chamber matches I can remember in along time.

Things would go WAY downhill after this so we have to take big names where we can get them. From Raw, July 11, 2011.

Drew McIntyre/Dolph Ziggler vs. Big Show

Show is all mad here. Ziggler starts and looks at Show. He tags out immediately so Show beats them both up. Show dominates Drew as Ziggler hides. Drew tries to leave and gets mauled by Show. McIntyre gets thrown up the stage and it’s a countout at 2:00.

Next up is Smackdown, March 9, 2012.

Here’s Drew McIntyre in his gear. Is anyone surprised by this? Drew says that Ace will rehired him if he wins a match against a mystery opponent.

Drew McIntyre vs. Great Khali

And never mind as Otunga says Khali isn’t in the match, so here’s the real opponent.

Drew McIntyre vs. Hornswoggle

So why did Khali come out there at all? Horny is terrified despite regularly beating full sized guys before. Drew dominates him and keeps pulling him up after slams. The referee stops it at 1:39.

Drew would head down to NXT for a few matches, including this one on July 25, 2012.

Seth Rollins vs. Drew McIntyre

I miss the full Broken Dreams entrance. That thing was awesome. Rollins speeds things up to start and dropkicks Drew down. Another dropkick puts McIntyre on the floor and a dive takes Drew down again. Back with a double clothesline putting both guys down. Rollins nips up and hits an enziguri to take Drew down. They head to the corner but Rollins’ charge hits the middle buckle. The advantage doesn’t last long as Rollins rolls Drew up for two and clotheslines him down for the same. A Phoenix Splash (moonsault into a 450) misses and Drew kicks Seth’s head off. Futureshock gets the clean pin at 5:30 shown of 9:00.

Rating: C-. This was basically a squash with a surprise ending. Rollins looked good here with him flying all over the place and hitting almost everything he tried. The ending is a bit questionable but it gives McIntyre a bit of credibility when he loses on this show more often. That’s probably the right move and the match wasn’t awful or anything.

Drew would join a rock band called 3MB (Three Man Band) along with Heath Slater and Jinder Mahal. They became comedy relief and eventually said they would be going after the Royal Rumble. Here’s a step towards that from Raw, January 14, 2013.

Sheamus vs. 3MB

This is an over the top rope challenge. JBL: “This isn’t fair.” Cole: “To Sheamus?” JBL: “No.” The band beats on Sheamus to start but he fights them off with ease. Sheamus hits a Regal Roll on McIntyre onto Mahal but can’t get Drew out. All three put him on the ropes but he easily fights them off. Mahal goes up like an idiot and gets knocked out. McIntyre gets backdropped out but Sheamus misses the Brogue Kick to send himself to the apron. He pulls Slater onto the top rope but the other members pull Sheamus to the floor, giving 3MB the win at 3:10. No rating for this due to obvious reasons.

Here’s a tag match from June 24, 2013 on Raw.

Tons of Funk vs. Usos vs. 3MB

The winners get a tag title shot, presumably at MITB. Tons of Funk have some guy who won a charity auction to come to the ring. It’s McIntyre and Mahal for 3MB here. Mahal starts with Jey who kicks Drew in the face and out to the apron. Off to Jimmy who gets run over by Tensai as everything breaks down. Brodus throws the Band out and dives off the apron to take them out. Back in the ring and Tensai gets two off the backsplash but it’s a superkick and Samoan Drop by Jey, setting up the Superfly Splash for the pin at 2:02.

We’ll wrap it up with Raw on April 28, 2014 with part of the feud that dominated 3MB’s last few months.

Los Matadores vs. 3MB

McIntyre and Slater here. The pre show match on Sunday is a, I kid you not, Wee L C match involving all of these guys plus the small ones. McIntyre sends Diego into the corner to start before it’s off to Slater. Heath doesn’t do all that well and it’s quickly off to Fernando who cleans house. The announcers of course spend the match making short jokes as Torito Gores Mahal’s groin into Hornswoggle’s head. Back in the ring and Slater hits an elevated DDT on Fernando for the pin at 2:19. JBL: “OH MY GOD 3MB WON! BARRY HOROWITZ IS ROLLING OVER IN HIS GRAVE AND HE’S NOT EVEN DEAD!”

Drew McIntyre is one of the guys that could have been something but was only so interesting even at his peak. When he was released a few weeks ago, people called it a waste of potential. However, look back at this timeline of his career: he hadn’t meant anything in about three years. This is hardly a huge loss for the company now and hasn’t been for years now. The guy is definitely talented though and he’ll be better when he’s a singles guy, though he needs a bit better character than The Chosen One.

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Something people don’t realize about Nitro.It was on the air for less than six years.  It ran all of 1996-2000, four months in 1995 and three months in 2001. If you jump back that far in modern WWE, it would be about January 2009. That’s before Sheamus debuted and when ECW on SyFy was still on the air. In that span of time, Nitro would have debuted, risen to the top, and been off the air. That’s really not that long in WWE time.

Adding on to that, the losing streak for Raw was 86 weeks (or something like that as it changes every time I hear it). That’s about a year and nine months, or if you flash back from today, roughly October 2012. That’s when Ryback still meant something and CM Punk was still WWE Champion. It really isn’t that long a stretch of time, but man alive did a lot of stuff happen in that span about 17 years ago.

Smackdown
Date: June 20, 2014
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re in the home stretch now for Money in the Bank as the WWE Title ladder match’s lineup is set. However, there’s now a second ladder match which was announced on Main Event. Seth Rollins is the only confirmed name for the match with the rest being announced on Raw. They’re really going to be stretched thin at the PPV as a result. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Cena vs. Kane from Raw.

Here’s Cena to get things going. He points out the titles above the ring and gives us a ten second recap of the last nine months of the titles. That brings us to Money in the Bank and it sounds like the start of a bad joke. “A Mexican, an Irishman, a European, a Duck Dynasty reject, a primadonna and Dudley Do-Right walk into a WWE ring.” Cena says that’s where the comedy stops because he’ll be knocking all of them out at Money in the Bank and taking his title back. So he’ll be knocking himself out?

This brings out Del Rio who says Cena needs to stop talking and start worrying. He qualified first and then he’ll climb the ladder first. Sheamus comes out and says people haven’t forgotten to be afraid of Del Rio. People just don’t care about him at all. Sheamus will leave the PPV as a double champion. Cue Cesaro with Heyman and the latter talking about how Cesaro loves a match where it’s every man for himself because only Cesaro has a full time strategist. I haven’t heard Heyman talk this fast in a long time.

Next up is Reigns with what sounds like new and slower music but it’s very similar to the Shield’s song. He has trouble trusting people anymore but now the only thing that matters are those titles. Reigns doesn’t care who you think you are (looking at Cena), no one is going to stop him. He and Cena stare each other down and John takes off his shirt but Orton interrupts. Randy reminds everyone that he’s the face of the WWE and Reigns is already on the ramp to brawl with Orton. They fight up by the stage while the others brawl in the ring. Sheamus and Cena clear the ring but don’t fight each other. This was fine.

Seth Rollins vs. Kofi Kingston

Rollins has new ring gear, including what look to be dark gray tights and no shirt. Kofi says he wants in the ladder match in an inset interview before we get going. Seth is quickly tripped down and splashed for two before Kofi takes him into the corner for some right hands. Kofi gets sent into the buckle and put in a chinlock about a minute into the match. Back up and Kofi nails a quick cross body for two but Trouble in Paradise hits the ropes. The buckle bomb and a good looking curb stomp put Kofi away at 2:55.

Post match Rollins gets on the mic and says he’ll win the briefcase. Ambrose pops up on screen and says tonight might be the night he gets his revenge on Rollins. If it’s not tonight, then it’s coming soon. Rollins says that might be a good idea if Ambrose didn’t have to face Kane. Dean: “Shut up.” Ambrose promises to take care of both Rollins and Kane.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Bad News Barrett

Non-title. Ziggler wants another chance to be Mr. Money in the Bank. The bad news of the week: everyone else’s chances at Money in the Bank are like the US’s World Cup team: they might have some early success but they’ll fall at the end. A quick dropkick puts Barrett down but he sends Dolph into the corner and kicks him out to the floor. We take an early break and come back with Ziggler fighting out of a chinlock but getting kicked in the ribs to put him right back down.

Some knees to the face set up the big boot in the ropes to put Ziggler on the floor. Back in and JBL references the White Bronco and Roddy Piper vs. Goldust at Wrestlemania XII. A jawbreaker puts Barrett down and a running cross body does the same. That’s about it for Dolph’s offense though as he walks into Winds of Change for two. The Bull Hammer misses and Ziggler grabs a sunset flip for the pin at 4:08 shown of 7:38.

Rating: C. Not enough time to go anywhere but they got in most of their signature stuff. I’m not wild on the ending but it’s nice to see Ziggler getting a clean win over a name. I’d assume both of them will be in the ladder match, but this doesn’t put much confidence in me for Barrett’s title reign.

Ziggler walks into a Bull Hammer post match.

Adam Rose vs. Titus O’Neil

Titus sends him into the corner to start but gets rollup for the pin at 42 seconds.

Titus says ring the bell again and gets rolled up for another pin at 10 seconds.

Kane vs. Dean Ambrose

Rollins is on commentary. Ambrose’s new ring gear is a white undershirt and jeans. It actually suits him well. Ambrose charges at Kane to start but gets sent face first into the buckle. Rollins dares Ambrose to come fight him anywhere as Kane drives knees into the ribs. Dean stops Kane with a boot to the face and a top rope dropkick puts Kane down. A clothesline does the same and Ambrose hammers away in the corner.

Dean escapes a quick chokeslam attempt and gets two off a tornado DDT. Rollins stands up and dares Dean to come fight him but Ambrose sends Kane outside instead. Dean dives on him before going after Rollins, only to walk into an uppercut from Kane. Back in and the chokeslam is good for the pin at 3:34.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have time to get anywhere but it was more about Ambrose vs. Rollins than anything else. Seth as part of the Authority rather than Evolution works much better as Orton is being phased out of the group anyway and Rollins as the new star isn’t a bad idea at all. Ambrose vs. Rollins will be one heck of a fight.

Rollins curb stomps Ambrose post match.

We recap the opening segment.

Big E. vs. Jack Swagger

Colter talks about Big E. taking a handout last week when Lana distracted Swagger. Big E.’s music cuts him off and we’re ready to go. Swagger takes out Big E.’s leg to start and clotheslines him out to the floor. Back in and Big E. runs him over and the Big Ending gets the pin at 47 seconds.

Fandango knocks on the Divas locker room door and tells Layla that they’re up. She says she’ll be right there so Fandango turns around and sees Summer Rae. Summer says she understands why Layla loves him but she loves Fandango more. Summer kisses him and of course Layla comes out and catches them, sending her back into the locker room in tears.

Video on the Special Olympics.

Fandango vs. Bo Dallas

Fandango comes out on his own but Summer runs out to dance with him. He isn’t sure but Layla runs out to jump Summer. Fandango tries to break it up but the girls get in the ring. Layla accidentally kicks Fandango in the head and the girls run to the back. The Bodog gets the pin at 1:16.

Fandango gets a pep talk post match.

The Wyatts pop up on screen with Bray talking about a bunch of mice running around chasing a piece of cheese. Bray is the snake entering the maze and the monster ready to sink its jagged teeth into the world. All he has to do is climb a ladder and take what is his to bring us into the era of Wyatt. Can we please get the writers a thesaurus for some new words other than era?

There will be six other people in the briefcase ladder match to be announced on Raw.

Roman Reigns/Sheamus/John Cena vs. Randy Orton/Cesaro/Bray Wyatt/Alberto Del Rio

Sheamus and Cesaro get things going with the Irishman hammering away in the corner. Cesaro takes him down to the mat before running away when Sheamus gets back up. Off to Wyatt for a slugout with Sheamus with the pale one nailing his running knee lift. Cesaro offers a distraction and Bray takes over. Back to Cesaro who hammers away but Sheamus says bring it on. Cesaro does just that but walks into a powerslam anyway.

Cena comes in for his bulldog, sending Cesaro off to Del Rio for a tag. Alberto does about as well as Cesaro as he’s taken into the corner without putting up any offense at all. Cena tags Sheamus back in and Reigns looks annoyed that he didn’t get the tag. Del Rio gets Sheamus into the corner for a tag off to Cesaro as the heels take over. The Irish Curse out of the corner sends Cesaro to the apron for the ten forearms to the chest.

We take a break and come back with Del Rio getting two on Sheamus off what looked to be a suplex. A chinlock keeps Sheamus in trouble as the fans want Roman. Sheamus shrugs it off and tags in Cena again to work over the now legal Orton. Randy is knocked to the floor and we get the seven man standoff followed by the seven man brawl. Orton brings Cena back inside for the Elevated DDT and stares down Reigns. Cena gets taken into the heel corner for some stomping before it’s off to Bray for the running splash.

Del Rio hits the low superkick but misses a charge and falls out to the floor. Cesaro throws him back inside for a fast tag to Orton who powerslams Cena down with ease. Randy hammers away before it’s back to Cesaro for more of the same. A delayed vertical suplex gets two on John and we hit the chinlock. Reigns looks like he’s about to explode on the apron. The fact that Cole described it using the exact same words frightens me a bit.

Cena fights up and suplexs Cesaro down but Swiss Death prevents the tag. Del Rio gets two off the corner enziguri but gets dropkicked out of the air to put both guys down. He’s right back up for another low superkick to stop the tag again though and it’s back to Cesaro. A big right hand knocks Sheamus off the apron but Cesaro is afraid to punch Reigns.

Cena avoids a shot to the head and makes the tag to Reigns for the house cleaning. Everything breaks down with Reigns hitting the apron dropkick but getting sent into a forearm from Wyatt. Del Rio kicks Roman in the ribs but the armbreaker is countered into the spear for the pin at 16:03 shown of 19:33.

Rating: B-. Again Reigns is made to look like a star and treated like a main event equal. I don’t think he wins the title but it’s still too early for him to do that anyway. This did what it was supposed to do and followed a solid tag team formula to get there. Cesaro being afraid to fight Reigns was a great visual too.

Overall Rating: C+. This was another show where most of the stuff went by so fast that it’s hard to grade it. The stuff that did get time was good though, especially the Money in the Bank build. I’m still not sure how they’re going to fill in a card with fourteen people in two matches and four in another but they’ve pulled off harder tricks before. Good building show tonight.

Results
Seth Rollins b. Kofi Kingston – Curb stomp
Dolph Ziggler b. Bad News Barrett – Sunset flip
Adam Rose b. Titus O’Neil – Rollup
Adam Rose b. Titus O’Neil – Rollup
Kane b. Dean Ambrose – Chokeslam
Big E. b. Jack Swagger – Big Ending
Bo Dallas b. Fandango – Bodog
Roman Reigns/John Cena/Sheamus b. Cesaro/Alberto Del Rio/Randy Orton/Bray Wyatt – Spear to Del Rio

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Smackdown
Date: June 13, 2014
Location: Resch Center Arena, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the day of bad luck but things haven’t been that bad in WWE as of late. The big story coming out of Monday is Daniel Bryan being stripped of the WWE Title due to his neck injury, meaning the ladder match at Money in the Bank is now for the title. Allegedly there’s going to be a second ladder match announced for the traditional briefcase, but if they don’t announce something by Monday I can’t picture it happening. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of HHH and Stephanie stripping Bryan of the title before announcing the ladder match for the title.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Shield to open things up. Ambrose says it’s clear that the Authority is trying to stack the deck against them. Well listen up kiddo: they’re flipping the table over and coming for HHH’s throat. As for his former business partner Seth Rollins, his business will be shut down for good. Reigns says Orton better enjoy his vacation because after Roman gets his hands on him, Orton will be on a permanent vacation. Maybe one of them will be the next WWE Champion.

HHH pops up on screen and says there are only a handful of spots in the ladder match and he’s only got one slot available. Therefore, he flips a coin and it’s Ambrose getting a qualifying match later tonight. His opponent: Bray Wyatt. Also, the Wyatts and Reigns will be banned from ringside, and Ambrose is banned from ringside for the next match.

Roman Reigns vs. Bad News Barrett

Non-title. Roman takes him into the corner to start and gets two off a floatover suplex. Barrett fights back with some forearms but gets sent to the floor with a big clothesline as we take a break. Back with Reigns fighting out of a chinlock but missing a charge into the corner, allowing Barrett to hammer away even more. Reigns fights out of another chinlock and hits a Samoan drop to get a breather. Some clotheslines set up the running apron dropkick and Barrett is in trouble. The Superman Punch connects but 3MB breaks up the spear for the DQ at 8:25.

Rating: C. The match was pretty much exactly what it was supposed to be and the ending makes perfect sense. It’s also going to lead to a fitting final night for Mahal and McIntyre as they’re about to be destroyed by Reigns. Also, see how easy it is to protect a champion and avoid an unnecessary loss? Why can’t they do that more often?

Mahal is thrown over the table, McIntyre is speared and Slater is speared out of the air so Reigns can stand tall.

Erick Rowan vs. Jey Uso

This is the second round of singles matches after Jimmy beat Harper on Main Event. Rowan charges to start but is quickly sent to the floor for the big dive. Back in and Jey avoids a splash and hammers away but is easily thrown off the middle rope. A modified side slam (basically a Rock Bottom with the arm around Jey’s waist) gets the pin for Rowan out of nowhere at 1:40.

Bo Dallas vs. R-Truth

Bo dances to Truth’s music for a funny visual. Truth does the pelvic thrust to start and Bo isn’t sure what to make of it. Bo gets thrown down again and is a bit flustered for the first time. He nails a right hand and defends it by saying Truth attacked him. Some knees to the face get two for Bo and it’s off to a cravate. Truth makes a quick comeback with the gordbuster for two but Bo avoids the ax kick. The Bodog makes Bo 7-0 at 2:57, which the announcers treat as something that matters.

Cesaro and Heyman say that Cesaro will be fighting tonight and win by technical knockout when the referee has to stop the match.

Sheamus vs. Cesaro

Non-title. Cesaro takes him into the corner to start but Sheamus fights back with right hands of his own. A kick to the face staggers Sheamus and Cesaro keeps pounding away in the corner. Sheamus blocks a suplex into one of his own though and the Irishman takes over. More big right hands have Sheamus in trouble but he gets belly to backed to change momentum again. Sheamus nails a Cactus Clothesline and we take a break.

Back with Cesaro nailing another knee to the head, only to be sent to the apron for the ten forearms. He’s able to fight out though, so Sheamus just hits him in the face to send it back to the floor. That’s fine with Cesaro as he pulls Sheamus off the apron and down onto the floor. Back in again and Cesaro hits some double stomps for two before bending Sheamus’ back around the ropes. More right hands have Sheamus in trouble but he says bring it on. Cesoar keeps hammering but gets sent back out to the floor.

Back in again and Sheamus hits his running knee lift to set up the ten forearms and the Irish Curse for two. White Noise is countered into Swiss Death for two but Sheamus still says bring it on. Cesaro hits him with every strike he can, only to get ax handled to the face and caught by the rolling fireman’s carry. Cesaro grabs the ropes to avoid the powerslam and counters into a small package with the tights for the pin at 14:40. That’s the same finish (minus the tights) from Payback.

Rating: B-. This was the usual good match between these two but I’m getting a bit tired of seeing them together. I do like the finish carrying over from the last match for the sake of continuity and the lack of a last second Brogue Kick is always a plus. It was entertaining too so it’s hard to really complain about this one.

After look back at the opening segment, Bray Wyatt talks about dreaming of glory as a child. He dreamed of a nice house on a hill with a white picket fence. He dreamed of happiness. Then he woke up and realized he was still stuck in this rotten world just like the rest of it. Abigail heard and told him that he would achieve everything he dreamed of and more. They will chant his name and bow down to him, and that’s the predicament he’s in now. Above that ladder lies his happy anding and his power. Unfortunately for Dean Ambrose, he stands in Bray’s way and will burn. Follow the buzzards.

On Main Event, Layla poured kitty litter and milk on Summer Rae to even the score from Monday.

Adam Rose vs. Fandango

Rose avoids a jump in the corner and gives Fandango a spank. The dancer takes him down and gets two off a suplex, only to have Rose roll away before Fandango can try the guillotine legdrop. Party Foul gets the pin at 1:45.

Post match Rose’s chicken gets in the ring and removes it’s beak to reveal Summer Rae. The catfight is on until Fandango saves his chick. Summer is actually working in this role.

Jack Swagger vs. Big E.

Swagger quickly sends Big E. out to the floor and takes his head off with a clothesline. Back in and Swagger pounds away but gets backdropped over the top and out to the floor. Big E. hits his clotheslines and the belly to belly followed by the Warrior Splash. Lana comes out for a distraction before the Big Ending, allowing Swagger to boot Big E.’s head off. Colter yells at Lana to get rid of her, but the Vader Bomb is countered with the Big Ending for the pin at 2:57. Colter yelling at Lana could lead to something, but so much for the ANGRY Swagger push.

Aksana vs. Alicia Fox

Aksana slaps her and nails some clotheslines to start before a snap suplex gets two. The release spinebuster gets two more but Fox comes back with her northern lights suplex. We hit the chinlock on Aksana followed by something like a snap Fameasser to a kneeling Aksana for the pin at 2:25.

The Raw ReBound looks at Rollins’ explanation.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Bray Wyatt vs. Dean Ambrose

It’s a brawl to start until Dean hits a cross body for two. He rakes Bray’s eyes across the ropes and hits his dropkick against the ropes to knock Bray outside. Ambrose dives over the top rope but gets caught in a release Rock Bottom against the apron. Back from a break with Bray working over the arm.

Ambrose escapes the suplex slam though and hits a DDT to get a breather. The bad arm is sent into the post though and Bray gets two off some headbutts. Off to a nerve hold but Bray misses the running backsplash. Dean goes to the apron but sends Bray into the buckle with one good arm. After fighting off a superplex attempt, Dean jumps into the release Rock Bottom but elbows his way out again.

Bray knocks him into the ropes but Dean bounces off the ropes with a clothesline for two. Ambrose says bring it on and charges at Wyatt in the corner. Bray goes outside but gets taken down by a running suicide dive. Back in and Dean hits his missile dropkick for two but the bulldog driver is easily broken up. Wyatt hits his running cross body but the suplex slam is countered into a small package. Now the bulldog driver connects but Seth Rollins is on the announcers’ table. Dean goes after him but Seth goes into the ring, sending Dean into Sister Abigail for the pin at 14:22.

Rating: B. This was getting good but it never hit that top level. I’m not wild on Bray wanting to be World Champion as he comes off more like a 1992 Cactus Jack, where he should only care about causing chaos rather than being champion. It’s an interesting idea though and Bray being champion wouldn’t be a stretch at this point.

Overall Rating: C+. This was your run of the mill Smackdown: the long matches were good enough, nothing was too terrible and there’s absolutely nothing that you need to see here at all. If you have nothing else to do, Smackdown isn’t the worst way to spend two hours, but you’d be better off throwing on an old show on the Network. That could be the same reaction to the show every week anymore.

Results
Roman Reigns b. Bad News Barrett via DQ when 3MB interfered
Erick Rowan b. Jey Uso – Side slam
Bo Dallas b. R-Truth – Bodog
Cesaro b. Sheamus – Small package
Adam Rose b. Fandango – Party Foul
Big E. b. Jack Swagger – Big Ending
Alicia Fox b. Aksana – Fameasser
Bray Wyatt b. Dean Ambrose – Sister Abigail

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Last night had some major events taking place and as usual, the fans aren’t all that pleased. To be fair it’s WWE, where nothing is ever satisfactory. Let’s get to it.

The opening promo was the Authority stripping Daniel Bryan of the WWE Title. At the end of the day, this is the only thing you can really do. The guy can’t wrestle and hasn’t been able to for a month, so you have to take it away. Luckily for Bryan, he was only champion for a month so it’s hard to jump on him for the weak ratings. If nothing else maybe he’ll be seen as valuable for them going down without him. The MITB ladder match will now be for the title and Randy Orton has been added to the match because he’s Randy Orton. Seriously that’s pretty much what HHH said.

In the same promo, HHH talks about how Shield was told to evolve but only Seth Rollins actually listened to him. This led to the announcement of a six man tag later with Ambrose and Reigns teaming up with whomever they could find against the Wyatts. Why anyone expected anyone not named John Cena to be the third man is beyond me. Yeah it was predictable, but don’t act like it was some big disappointment just because you figured out who it was and they didn’t throw in a big curveball. That’s your fault for inventing some standard. If you don’t like Cena that’s one thing, but saying that him being the third man is a stupid idea shows that you really don’t know what you’re talking about.

Sheamus beat Bad News Barrett in a MITB qualifying match. Say it with me: Sheamus got beaten up and hit a Brogue Kick for the win out of nowhere. Typical hard hitting and not bad match between these two.

The Wyatts had a promo with Bray saying he was reborn. This was below their usual standard.

Lana showed off her legs while Rusev destroyed Ryder.

The Goldust Needs A Partner story continued with R-Truth. Something that I haven’t touched on in this story is Ryback and Axel picking up a lot of wins. It’s building them up as a new set of challengers and that’s something the Usos need right now. I love killing two birds with one stone. Later in the night Cody promised a new partner next week who will magnify Goldust’s greatness. I saw someone say it’s Sandow as Goldust and that’s probably the case…..unless Cody is now a Boliever. I have no idea why but that popped into my head as a possibility last week. I know it doesn’t make sense and I doubt it happens but it was there.

Summer Rae poured milk over Layla and it looked like male ejaculation. You know you were all thinking it.

Now we get to the real meat of the show: Shield attacked 3MB and got to talk about Rollins. Ambrose got right to the point by saying he was going to beat Rollins up very, very badly. This was a really simple promo but Ambrose was bleeding charisma out there and the whole thing worked really well.

Then we got to the one I really liked. Reigns spoke in a very calm and casual voice about how Seth committed the most horrible sin of them all. Roman is coming after all three of them and Rollins is his first target, followed by Orton and then HHH, presumably at Summerslam.

Reigns going through Evolution one by one is a great story and will make him look like a huge star. I loved how casual he was with this and acted like this was something he just had to deal with. Not a lot of people talk in a voice like that and it worked for him. He even capped it off with a Game of Thrones reference, because Roman Reigns is 29 years old and actually in tune with pop culture rather than referencing things that were big deals 15 years ago.

Damien Sandow dressed as a dancer to team with Fandango (accompanied by a still milky Layla for no logical reason) in a loss to the Usos. If there’s a point to this Sandow stuff, please feel free to get to it anytime.

Bo Dallas beat Xavier Woods in the usual Dallas formula.

Cesaro beat RVD to qualify for the ladder match. There’s really nothing to say here.

Cole had a sitdown interview with Rollins to explain why he did this. The explanation was that Rollins founded the Shield and didn’t like sharing the credit. That helps, but it really doesn’t answer why he joined Evolution. Shield has proven that they’re better than Evolution, so why would Rollins want to work with or under a leader that he’s defeated twice now? It would make more sense to have Rollins strike out on his own or start a new stable with lackeys of his own. Instead he’s arguably third fiddle in Evolution and lower than when this whole thing started. I still think there was no reason for this other than shock value but this helped.

Ambrose and Reigns ran in post interview but the Wyatts made the save, drawing out Cena for the obvious reveal.

Paige beat Alicia Fox again and Fox freaked out on Aksana for costing her the match. I’d like to point out again: I don’t care about stories involving crazy losers.

Jack Swagger got fired up by a slap from Zeb and beat Santino. I didn’t care the first 5 times they did this and I don’t care now. Swagger has needed a repackaging for about four years now, since he’s been the same character since roughly 2009.

The six man main event was fine and did a nice job of storytelling. Having Reigns and Ambrose finally beat the Wyatts in a six man in their first try without Rollins shows that he was the reason they couldn’t do it and adds to the story. Reigns tearing through everyone is going to be an awesome sight to see.

Last night’s Raw was a good example of having everything go so fast that I didn’t have time to complain about most of it. The matches were mostly short but the most part nothing was all that terrible. This show was about the main event scene and we got a lot of stuff added on to the big pay per view match. Also we got a preview of what’s coming for Reigns and that’s the most important thing for the future. Efficient but not a great show this week.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: June 9, 2014
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

The main story coming into tonight are the fallout from Seth Rollins turning on Shield last week. Tonight we should be getting revenge from Ambrose and Reigns, who didn’t appear on Smackdown last week. On top of that, the breaking news today is Daniel Bryan not being cleared for Money in the Bank, meaning the title will likely be held up. Let’s get to it.

Here’s a very happy Authority to open the show. Stephanie talks about how they like to make blockbuster announcements and gives us a video of Daniel Bryan’s doctor. Dr. Maroon says that Daniel won’t be able to participate at Money in the Bank due to the severity of his neck injury. HHH is very pleased as Stephanie officially strips Bryan of the title. Stephanie wishes Bryan well and acknowledges his very selfish wife Brie.

However we still need a WWE Champion, so at Money in the Bank we’ll have a WWE Championship ladder match. The participants will be determined by a series of qualifying matches. Stephanie says the first qualifying match took place on Smackdown (it was on Raw) so Alberto Del Rio is in. HHH says Randy Orton is in as well because he deserves it. They’ve been saying it since Wrestlemania, but now this is proof: Daniel Bryan isn’t WWE Championship material.

HHH isn’t done yet as he rants about telling Shield to adapt or perish but only Seth Rollins listened to what he said. We get a video of the turn last week, which still took place after Shield beat Evolution twice in a row. As for tonight, Ambrose and Reigns will be in a six man tag match against the Wyatt Family. They need to find a partner though, which might be tough after they spent a year running roughshod over the entire locker room. However, they need to adapt or they’ll perish.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Sheamus vs. Bad News Barrett

Non-title. Barrett takes him into the corner to start but gets run over with a clothesline. Sheamus is sent out to the floor and Barrett follows it up with a shoulder block off the steps. Back in and Sheamus takes him down again before hitting the ten forearms. A middle rope knee drop misses and Barrett kicks him in the face, only for a running cross body from Sheamus to put both guys on the floor.

Back from a break with Sheamus in a chinlock before Barrett drops an elbow for two. Sheamus fights up but runs into a knee to the head, only to avoid the low superkick and get two off the Irish Curse. Winds of Change gets the same for Barrett but he walks into the tilt-a-whirl powerslam for two. Sheamus loads up the Brogue but Barrett rolls to the floor, only to have Sheamus dive off the top. It’s a bad move though, as Barrett steps to the side and Sheamus crashes into the barricade.

He beats the count back in at nine and kicks out of Wasteland at two. The Bull Hammer is countered into White Noise for a very close two but Barrett counters the slingshot shoulder with a headbutt. He kicks Sheamus in the head over and over before ramming Sheamus shoulder first into the post twice in a row. Another series of kicks to the head in the corner….set up the Brogue Kick out of nowhere for the pin for Sheamus at 13:12.

Rating: B-. As this whole thing was going on, I was saying to myself “and then Sheamus hits a Brogue Kick out of nowhere for the pin”, and that’s exactly what happened. How did I know that was going to happen? Because that’s what always happens. At least the stuff before the ending was good. Also are we just going to forget about Sheamus’ head injury from before Payback?

The Wyatts pop on screen and says people were supposed to forget about them. Bray says he’s been reborn, despite only being gone eight days and making an appearance on Smackdown in between.

Lana comes out and makes fun of Obama for being a weak man. We get a video of I’m assuming the real Obama working out with some very light weights. Lana compares him to Putin who is known to be in good shape and trains in martial arts. We get a rather disturbing picture of a shirtless Putin on a horse which I’ve seen before and is still just as disturbing.

Rusev vs. Zack Ryder

Forearms to the back of the head, the running superkick and the Accolade end Ryder at 1:03.

Ryback/Curtis Axel vs. Goldust/R-Truth

Truth gets attacked to start but he escapes for the hot (?) tag less than a minute in. Goldust cleans house and hits the snap powerslam on Axel. Ryback comes in and the spinning cross body takes out both he and Curtis as Cody is watching in the back. Truth is thrown to the floor and Goldust nails a spinebuster on Ryback. Axel sneaks in from behind though and rolls up Goldust for the pin with a handful of tights for the pin at 2:20.

Layla is getting her makeup done while insulting the people of Minneapolis, including hometown girl Summer Rae. Summer comes up behind her and pours milk over her before ramming Layla into various things.

3MB is in the ring but here come Ambrose and Reigns. The beating is on and they fight up the aisle with Reigns hitting a spear to Slater completely off screen. It looked like a camera error as they were looking at the crowd for a long stretch of time. Thankfully the replay shows a good shot of it.

Ambrose says the Shield was going to go down as one of the best groups ever. They dominated WWE and everyone in it, including Evolution. The team was healthy on the surface but there was a cancer inside them called Seth Rollins. Ambrose says he’ll get the chance to rearrange Rollins’ face by moving his nose over to his one ear (“because you’ll only have one left”) and that they’ll beat Rollins up. I like how simple that last line was.

Reigns very casually (not a bad thing) says Seth committed the most unforgettable sin. After he gets done with Rollins, Reigns is coming for Orton so he can mess up the face of the WWE. Then he’s coming for HHH. When he gets his hands on the King of Kings, they’ll have their own Game of Thrones.

Seth Rollins will break his silence tonight, despite talking on Smackdown.

Usos vs. Fandango/Damien Sandow

Damien comes out in what looks like long underwear and a streamer for what’s described as “interpretive dance.” Layla still has milk on her because WWE doesn’t have towels. Fandango cranks on Jimmy’s arm to start but Jimmy comes back with the dancing right hand. Off to Damien and the dancing begins. Sandow takes Jimmy over with a headlock before dancing around. Jimmy JUMPS up for a superkick before knocking Fandango off the apron. Jey hits the Superfly Splash for the pin on Sandow at 2:24.

Bo Dallas vs. Xavier Woods

Dallas says the way for Bryan to get back sooner than later is to BOLIEVE! Woods gets caught in a headlock to start but hiptosses Bo down to escape. A knee to the ribs drops Woods again but he sends Dallas into the buckle, only to springboard into something like a spear. The Bodog is good for the pin at 2:30.

Bo tells Woods to never quit after the match.

Back from a break with Paul Heyman in the ring and talking about the same thing he’s talked about every night since Wrestlemania. Tonight he’s here to introduce the next WWE World Heavyweight Champion, who is coming off his history making moment at Wrestlemania……CESARO! Heyman was teasing Lesnar if that wasn’t clear.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Cesaro vs. Rob Van Dam

Rob quickly takes him down for two before walking into a tilt-a-whirl powerslam for two. The monkey flip and top rope kick to the face send Cesaro to the floor and a flip dive drops him again as we take a break. Back with Cesaro cranking on a chinlock and throwing RVD out to the floor. They head back inside for another chinlock before Rob nails the spinwheel kick and a clothesline to take over. Cesaro misses a charge in the corner and the split legged moonsault gets two.

Van Dam tries to speed things up a bit too much though and gets caught by Swiss Death out of the corner for an even closer near fall. A powerbomb gets two more for Cesaro but he gets kicked down and nailed with Rolling Thunder. Back up and Rob nails another spinning kick in the corner but gets crotched down for his efforts. Cesaro wraps the leg around the post before Neutralizing RVD for the pin at 10:50.

Rating: C+. Good but not great match here. WWE is really getting into a funk with how they do every kind of match and you can see it here very clearly. They just kept trading their signature stuff until the winner hit a finisher for the pin. That’s almost the same formula you see in every upper midcard match and it’s getting a bit annoying.

We recap the Authority and Shield’s promos from earlier.

Michael Cole brings out Seth Rollins, now with his own music and in a suit, for a sitdown interview. Rollins says he doesn’t understand the controversy behind what he did because he was looking out for his own business. He takes credit for creating the Shield and says the other two have no right to claim any of its success. Ambrose would be face first in a ditch without him and Reigns needs someone to focus his aggression.

Cole asks about the Shield being three individuals instead of one man. Rollins says we’ll see about that tonight. He took Shield to the top and that brings us to Payback. Rollins learned from Evolution that you have to evolve and adapt. The fans say he sold out but he says he bought in to the evolution of Seth Rollins. Rollins brags about the guts it took last week but people are fixated on how he turned on his brothers. Seth says they were just business partners and he severed those connections.

For two years, Rollins put his fist out and said believe in the Shield. What he really meant was that everyone should believe in Seth Rollins. That’s all for the explanation, so now where are Ambrose and Reigns to do what they promised? Here they come and Rollins takes off his tie but we’ve got Wyatts. The lights come back on and the Family is in the ring for the fight. Bray is nowhere in sight but Rollins comes back inside….just as Rollins and Harper are sent outside. Bray and the Family come back in for the save but Cena comes out for the real save, apparently becoming the third man for the tag match later.

Paige vs. Alicia Fox

Non-title and Alicia has Aksana in her corner. Paige quickly heads outside to go after Aksana and gets dropkicked off the apron as a result. Fox puts on a chinlock and yells a lot before hitting a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. Paige counters a side slam with a headscissors out of the floor as Cole describes Fox as a “mood ring maker’s dream.” Back in and Paige fires off a bunch of clotheslines followed by a bad looking running dropkick for two. Aksana yells a lot so Paige throws Fox into her, setting up the PTO on Fox for the submission at 4:56.

Rating: D+. This was sloppy at times but not horrible. Fox’s push is pretty much done as she keeps losing every match she’s in, making the character development rather worthless. She does look good in the shorts though. Paige getting another win on TV is good for her though as she can keep dominating until someone is built up to beat her.

Fox beats up Aksana post match before stealing water and popcorn from fans to pour on Aksana. She feeds some to Aksana against her will and that’s about it. JBL calling for anyone from Jesse Ventura to the Gagnes to help them made me chuckle.

Santino Marella vs. Jack Swagger

Marella escapes an early powerslam attempt and sends Jack out to the floor with a forearm. Colter slaps Swagger in the face and Jack is all fired up, to the point that he misses a charge into the post. Thankfully he blocks the Cobra and hits the gutwrench powerbomb for the pin at 1:57.

Cody Rhodes tells Goldust that he’s found the perfect partner for him. Next week, Goldust’s partner will magnify his star power. No word on who it is.

We look at Stephanie stripping Bryan of the title and announcing Money in the Bank being for the title.

Stephanie is annoyed at Cena for getting in her business two weeks in a row. Vickie Guerrero comes in with champagne for the two of them because Brad Maddox and Daniel Bryan are both gone. She sneezes on Stephanie and gets thrown out with a threat of being fired again.

Dean Ambrose/Roman Reigns/John Cena vs. Wyatt Family

It’s a brawl to start until we officially gets going with Ambrose hammering away on Rowan. Dean cleans house and even dives on Harper for good measure. Back in and Dean dropkicks Erick down before the tag brings in Reigns to pound away as well. Rowan finally gets in a shot of his own and makes the tag to Harper, who can’t quite suplex Roman. Instead Reigns suplexes him down for two before driving Harper into the corner for the tag to Ambrose.

The Wyatts take over on Dean with Bray shouting at him to come on. Dean is taken to the floor where he’s able to send Rowan into the steps for a breather. Back in and Harper easily takes him down again and cranks on a chinlock as the dueling Cena chants begin. We come back from a break with Rowan hitting a big side slam on Ambrose before it’s back to Bray for his usual theatrics.

Ambrose gets a boot up to stop a charging Wyatt and the hot tag finally brings in Cena. John hammers away but the Family takes over on him as well via a boot to the face. Back to Bray for the running backsplash for two and Bray laughs a lot. Harper hits a rack neckbreaker for two more and a Michinoku Driver gets the same. Bray pounds in a few right hands and headbutts before taking him back inside for the dancing spot.

The suplex slam gets two before Cena finally gets over for the real hot tag to Reigns. Roman cleans house with all of his signature spots as everything breaks down. Reigns does Cena’s ProtpBomb for two on Harper before Cena cross bodies Rowan down. Bray hits the Sister Abigail on Cena but walks into the Superman Punch. Rowan is thrown outside as well, setting up the suicide dive from Ambrose. A superkick (good one too) gets two for Harper but he walks into the spear for the pin at 20:46.

Rating: B-. This was a nice bit of storytelling with the Shield losing Rollins but finally being able to beat the one team that had eluded them in their reign of dominance. Reigns continues to look awesome and Ambrose has more charisma than he knows what to do with. Not a great match but it more than did what it was supposed to do.

Rollins and HHH look on from the back to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This wasn’t a great show but it did some of the things WWE has needed to do. Rollins’ promo was good and explained his mindset, but it still doesn’t make a ton of sense. He wants all of the credit for Shield’s success. That’s fine, but I don’t get why you join a team of losers to get that. Wouldn’t it make more sense to just go out on your own because you don’t need them?

The rest of the show was solid enough with some matches that went by too fast to really be bad. Money in the Bank is shaping up and hopefully there’s only one ladder match this year. I’m not wild on Cena vs. the Wyatts continuing but the upcoming PPV could change a lot of things. The show went by quickly tonight and nothing was horrible so I’m pleased.

Results
Sheamus b. Bad News Barrett – Brogue Kick
Rusev b. Zack Ryder – Accolade
Curtis Axel/Ryback b. Goldust/R-Truth – Rollup to Goldust
Usos b. Fandango/Damien Sandow – Superfly Splash to Fandango
Bo Dallas b. Xavier Woods – Bodog
Cesaro b. Rob Van Dam – Neutralizer
Paige b. Alicia Fox – PTO
Jack Swagger b. Santino Marella – Gutwrench powerbomb
Dean Ambrose/Roman Reigns/John Cena b. Wyatt Family – Spear to Harper

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Payback 2014
Date: June 1, 2014
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

Tonight is an interesting show for a variety of reasons. First and foremost, we’ll find out the fate of the World Title as Daniel Bryan has to either surrender the belt or his wife Brie is fired. Other than that we have Cena vs. Bray Wyatt in a last man standing match which is going to determine where Bray goes from here. The real main event is Evolution vs. Shield in an anything goes elimination match which should steal the show. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Hornswoggle vs. El Torito

This is mask vs. hair due to 3MB ripping off Torito’s tail on Monday. Torito is wearing a 2/3 shirt which is a reference I don’t quite get. A right hand drops Torito early but he ducks the next few and rolls over Hornswoggle’s back. Torito dropkicks him down and we get an airplane spin. Both guys are dizzy and they hit heads to put them both down. Hornswoggle is up first and is so dizzy that his splash lands about five feet away from Torito (on purpose).

Torito hits a spinning kick to the ribs for two and the kickout sends him into Charles Robinson’s arms. Hornswoggle covers as well and Robinson just lets him hit the mat. A gore to the back sends Hornswoggle outside and Slater goes after Torito’s horns but Hornswoggle knocks him off the apron and into the barricade. The big guys get into it and a series of dives puts them all down on the floor.

Hornswoggle wants to dive as well but it’s McIntyre clearing house beforehand. That’s fine with Hornswoggle though as he dives through the ropes like a bowling ball. Slater goes to the apron but Torito hits a top rope hurricanrana to send him onto the big pile. Back to the little guys in the ring and Torito hits a Bronco Buster but Hornswoggle counters another hurricanrana into a sitout powerbomb for two. Hornswoggle pulls the mask off but there’s another underneath, allowing Torito to hit a Bullsault press for the pin at 7:10.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t quite up to the standard of last month’s match but it was still funny and entertaining stuff. The key to these guys is they can actually wrestle a good match instead of just being out there for comedy. It’s not bad at all, but they need to worry about doing this too often. This match should be the blowoff and it’s fine.

The opening video is about how the whole world is sitting on a ticking bomb and it’s about to go off. The song is good and the visuals about everyone wanting revenge and payback make it even better. Only the two biggest matches get any focus as you would expect.

US Title: Sheamus vs. Cesaro

Sheamus is defending. This is due to Cesaro beating Sheamus but not shaking Sheamus’ hand post match. Cesaro also attacked Sheamus recently and injured his head which hasn’t been played up all that much since. Before the match, Heyman says he’s here to advocate for a Paul Heyman Guy. The fans chant for Punk but Heyman says Punk is over at the United Center watching the Blackhawks game. They’ll have their streak broken, just like Brock Lesnar broke the Undertaker’s Streak at Wrestlemania. Heyman can get that in from anywhere.

Sheamus charges out of the corner at the bell and hits some running ax handles. Cesaro counters with a throw to send Sheamus down before nailing him with an uppercut. A boot to the side of the head puts Sheamus in the corner for some more uppercuts. Sheamus comes right back with the rolling fireman’s carry but Cesaro snaps his throat across the top rope to block the ten forearms.

The second attempt works a bit better though and the fans loudly count along. Sheamus adds in another ten for good measure. They head outside and Cesaro is sent into the barricade. Back in and the slingshot shoulder is countered with another uppercut. Cesaro pulls him back in with the apron superplex for two and Heyman is fired up. A tiger bomb sets up a double stomp for two on the champion. Sheamus is whipped into the corner but comes back with the Irish Curse for two. Cole finally brings up the head injury for the first time.

Three straight middle rope knee drops get two on Cesaro before he charges into a boot in the corner. Swiss Death works a bit better but Sheamus is out at two. This has been VERY physical so far. Cesaro slaps him over and over but Sheamus is all BRING IT ON. Sheamus slams him down but misses the Brogue Kick, only to get caught in the German suplex for two. Cesaro floats over but Sheamus counters the Neutralizer into White Noise for a close two.

The Cloverleaf doesn’t work but Cesaro dives into Sheamus’ arms and the hold is on. Cesaro crawls to the ropes and comes back up with a tilt-a-whirl slam for two more. The Swing returns and the fans are WAY into Cesaro again. Cesaro loads up the Neutralizer but Sheamus grabs a small package out of nowhere for the pin at 11:36.

Rating: B. I can actually live with the way that loss went as Cesaro looked great and the psychology was perfect: they kept beating each other up with harder and harder moves but Sheamus went completely the other way and capitalized on the dizziness for the pin with a basic wrestling move. The fans were digging this and it’s a very solid opener.

Earlier tonight Cody Rhodes and Goldust agreed they would get the job done tonight.

Goldust/Cody Rhodes vs. Ryback/Curtis Axel

Bonus match. Axel hammers on Goldust to start but gets caught in a quick atomic drop. Off to Ryback vs. Cody with Ryback throwing him around, only to get caught with a dropkick before it’s back to Goldust for a one count. Axel nails a running knee and sends Goldust into the corner as the heels take over. Ryback hits his middle rope splash before a double team arm wringer face plant puts Goldust down again. It’s time to work on the arm before a small package gets two on Ryback.

A handspring elbow of all things puts Ryback down but Axel breaks up the tag. Goldust takes him down as well with a modified powerbomb, allowing the tag to Cody. Rhodes cleans house and takes Ryback down with a springboard missile dropkick before dropkicking Axel out of the air.

The somewhat botched moonsault press takes both heels down for two on Ryback but the Disaster Kick is caught in mid air. Cody is thrown into his brother and the Meat Hook gets two. Goldust catches Axel in a powerslam and Cross Rhodes gets two on Ryback with Curtis making a save. Axel is sent outside again but the Disaster Kick is caught in Shell Shock for the pin at 7:50.

Rating: C+. Yeah it was filler but it likely ends the team for good. Axel and Ryback are nothing special but they’re not bad for a low level heel team. I’d still like to see Ryback do something on his own and Axel, while still not good, is better than he was a few months ago. Nice match here and it’s hard to complain about extra wrestling.

Post match Cody says Goldust needs a better partner and walks away.

Rusev vs. Big E.

Lana does her thing and Rusev is now from Moscow and weighed in kilos. They both hit their running body attacks to start with neither guy going anywhere. A nasty release German puts Big E. down as the fans want Ziggler. Rusev hits a running splash in the corner but Big E. comes back with a kind of STO. Rusev gets back up on the apron and Big E. spears him through the ropes and out to the floor in a BIG collision. Big E. comes up favoring his arm but is still able to get two. The Warrior Splash is countered by the jumping superkick and the Accolade makes Big E. tap at 3:35.

Rating: C+. Another solid match here with Big E. getting to show off before jobbing to the new monster. That jumping superkick is just awesome with Rusev still making great contact despite getting off the ground. The spear through the ropes looked great too as they’re really playing up the physicality tonight.

Money in the Bank promo, featuring talking money.

Kofi Kingston vs. Bo Dallas

Thjs was announced on the pre-show and Dallas is now The Inspirational Bo Dallas. Bo talks about the Blackhawks losing tonight but Kane hits the ring as soon as the bell rings. Bo hides on the floor and Kane hits Kofi for the DQ at 34 seconds.

Kane destroys Kofi but Bo reminds us to BOLIEVE!

We look back at Hornswoggle getting his head shaved.

Intercontinental Title: Bad News Barrett vs. Rob Van Dam

Barrett is defending and Van Dam won a Beat the Clock Challenge to get the shot. The Bad News of the night: not only is Van Dam not getting payback, after tonight he won’t be getting any paychecks. JBL thinks having three initials for a name is stupid, and Cole is quick to point out how stupid this is in case the fans are REALLY slow tonight. That kind of stuff is so annoying.

Van Dam wins an early slugout with some kicks for two but another one misses in the corner, allowing Barrett to take over. They head outside with Barrett getting caught on the barricade for the spinning kick to the back. Barrett throws him into the corner and catches Van Dam with a kick to the ribs before nailing the big boot to knock Van Dam back to the floor. The elbow drop off the apron crushes Van Dam even more and we hit the chinlock back inside.

Van Dam escapes a pumphandle slam and scores with the stepover kick to the face. The champion is sent into the corner and kicked down again, setting up Rolling Thunder for two. Five Star and Bull Hammer both miss and they fall outside one more time, where a Bull Hammer attempt hits post. Back in and Rob scores with a tornado DDT for two but walks into the Bull Hammer for the pin at 9:40.

Rating: B-. I really liked this which surprised me quite a bit. Van Dam losing isn’t a surprise at all but that doesn’t mean they can’t have a good match anyway. Barrett is on fire right now and a clean pin over a former World Champion on pay per view isn’t going to hurt that at all.

Long recap of Stephanie and Bryan’s segment from Raw. Basically Bryan either has to forfeit the title or his wife is fired.

Stephanie brings out Bryan and Brie for the big moment. The boss is of course her usual evil self and puts all of this on Bryan. If the two of them one day have some weird bearded babies, Bryan needs to be able to tell them that he wasn’t selfish and did the right thing. Bryan mentions how the fans reacted to Stephanie (cue more booing) and gives her a chance to change the fans’ minds. A CM Punk chant starts up but Stephanie says they want him to quit, just like CM Punk did.

She gives him the ultimatum again but Bryan wants to talk about Stephanie’s kids. They’re going to have to watch their mom be a selfish, narcissistic….what’s that word? Brie fills in the blank and says Bryan has to do the right thing. Daniel looks at the titles but Brie says hang on. She won’t be controlled by Stephanie and says she quits. Stephanie laughs at her so Brie slaps her in the face. Stephanie is STUNNED as Brie and Bryan do the YES chant.

We recap Bray Wyatt vs. John Cena. This is the third match in a trilogy with Cena winning the first but Bray winning the second in a cage at Extreme Rules. The idea of the story is Bray wanting to show the evil inside of Cena and expose him as a fraud. Bray tried to attack Jerry Lawler on Monday but Cena and the Usos made the save. Tonight it’s a last man standing match.

John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt

Last man standing. Bray’s intro is extra fired up as he shouts that these fans are his people and staring Lawler down. The Family gets up on the aprons but the Usos run out to even things up. Cena knocks Bray down to start but Wyatt comes right back with a big right hand of his own. Bray’s shirt says Champion of Suffering. A running elbow puts Cena down and Bray picks him up for the dancing spot. John comes back with the running shoulders (Cole: “Cena wants to lead.”) followed by the ProtoBomb and Shuffle.

Bray runs him over again with a running knee to the ribs and demands a count. The running backsplash misses but Bray kicks off the STF and hits a release Rock Bottom for a seven count. Sister Abigail is countered but Bray runs Cena over with that cross body style move of his. Cena is knocked to the floor and Bray yells at Lawler some more. John has to fight out of a superplex and comes back with the top rope Fameasser for six.

Bray hits a quick Sister Abigail out of nowhere for eight before Cena hits a wobbly AA for seven, with Bray doing the Spider thing to break the count. The Family and the Usos start fighting with Jimmy hitting a HUGE dive to take the other three out. Bray hits Cena in the ribs with a chair and a second shot connects to the back. A third shot put Cena on the floor but he’s up at seven.

Bray misses a chair shot and drops the chair, allowing Cena to blast him in the ribs and back for good measure. Wyatt is back up at seven but Cena has brought in a table. An AA through the table is countered and Bray sends him through instead with the suplex slam. Cena is up at nine but a running shot with the steps puts him down again. Bray conducts the fans as they sing and stands on the steps to take a bow. This time it’s Cena with a chair shot and a steps shot to put Bray down. Cena’s elbow is bleeding a bit.

The cult leader rolls outside but Cena throws the steps over the top and RIGHT INTO BRAY’S FACE. I remember Kane doing that to Umaga many years ago but this looked far better. It’s only good for eight though so it’s time for a second table. We look at a replay and miss what looked like Sister Abigail on the floor. Cena is up at eight and a replay shows it was Cena jumping off the apron but getting caught in Sister Abigail.

Bray is whipped knees first into the steps but he backdrops Cena onto the steps. The running backsplash off the steps crushes Cena but he’s up at eight. Bray picks up the chair but charges into an AA on the floor. Harper and Rowan run back out to beat up Cena and get Bray back to his feet at eight. Back in and the Family takes Cena out again and load up a table but the Usos run out for the save. Harper stops a diving Jey with a table shot to the head (and a great thud) as Bray is laid out on the floor to no count.

Two tables are set up next to each other and the Usos are put down again. Jey is able to escape a fallaway slam and kick Rowan in the face before the running Umaga attack puts him through a table leaned against the barricade. Harper slams Jimmy off the top through the two tables. We haven’t looked at Cena or Bray in about two minutes now. Bray escapes an AA on the floor and cross bodies Cena through the timekeeper’s area.

They’re both up at seven and fight through the crowd with Bray getting the better of it. Cena is thrown off camera and something explodes. Cena seems to be fine and they slug it out on an anvil case until Bray is AA’d through a wooden box. John tilts another case on top of the box to trap Bray inside for the ten count at 24:18.

Rating: B+. I’m not feeling that ending at all but there’s more to talk about here first. I really don’t get why they had a mini match between the teams. Their feud is already set up and I’d assume we get a showdown for the titles tomorrow or at Money in the Bank at the latest. It really stopped the match and while it was cool, it didn’t need to be here.

That being said, the ending just doesn’t work at all. It really makes Bray look like a goon that got caught instead of a warrior of any kind. The match was really physical but there’s no need for Cena to win here. It stops Bray cold and doesn’t play to the idea of him being a hypocrite or anything like that. Instead he just lost after being even in physicality and then getting outsmarted by Cena being clever. Not a fan of this at all.

Divas Title: Alicia Fox vs. Paige

Paige is defending after getting pinned by Fox in a non-title match. A quick knee to the back puts Fox on the apron and a floatover suplex gets two for the champion. Paige hits her in the nose to possibly make Fox cry but she trips the champion up, driving her back first onto the apron. The announcers are of course in their own little unfunny world as the girls brawl on the floor with Fox slapping a clown in the audience. Literally, he has red hair and makeup on.

Back in and Fox takes Paige down while shouting that Paige wants to ruin her face. Fox cranks on a chinlock before laying on her back (JBL: “WHY ISN’T THE REFEREE COUNTING???) to bend Paige’s back over Fox’s knees. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker has Paige in trouble before Fox throws her to the floor. This match is dragging. Back in and Fox shouts RAIN for no apparent reason before Paige makes her comeback. She charges into Fox’s knee but shrugs it off and puts on the PTO for the submission at 6:35 to retain.

Rating: D+. It’s not bad but it felt like it went on for about fifteen minutes. They kind of booked themselves into a corner here as you couldn’t have Paige lose this early but it’s kind of a waste of Fox’s recent push. This is the better ending though as Fox has lost already and it advanced the character even more. Not bad here but it was in the middle of the two matches people wanted to see.

The fans tell Fox that she tapped out but she stomps her feet and demands silence. Fox finally runs off to the back.

The expert panel (Booker T., Alex Riley and Josh Matthews) chat for a bit.

We recap the main event. It’s a rematch from last month as Shield vs. Evolution has kept trying to one up each other for months now in an effort to prove who is the better three man team. This gets the music video treatment.

Evolution vs. Shield

Anything goes and elimination rules with falls having to take place in the ring. This is going to be insane and odds are I’ll miss a lot early on but I’ll do my best. Batista is in blue while his partners are in black for an awkward visual. Brawl to start as there aren’t any tags required here. Rollins and HHH are the only ones left in the ring with Seth hitting a quick enziguri to knock HHH to the floor. All six are already in the crowd or near the entrance way with Seth diving off the barricade to take HHH down.

Ambrose and Randy fight back to ringside as the power guys fight in the aisle. Rollins throws HHH back to ringside as Reigns sends Batista into the steps. Things settle down with tagging set up, despite it being anything goes and nothing stopping triple teaming. Shield takes over on Batista to start but he’s able to take Rollins into the corner for a heel beating. It’s quickly off to Ambrose though and a double snap suplex puts Orton down. Dean rips at Randy’s face and it’s off to Reigns for a headbutt to Orton’s back.

Randy comes back with an uppercut and it’s Batista in off the tag but getting popped in the jaw to a nice reaction. Back to Ambrose vs. HHH with the Game LOUDLY calling some spots. Dean hangs in there for a few seconds before it’s Reigns coming in. The fans seem very interesting in this showdown. HHH is quickly shoved down so he tries a slugout, only to be backdropped with ease. Rollins comes in for Three Amigos (and an Eddie chant) as HHH is in big trouble. Why Orton and Batista wait on the apron instead of helping isn’t quite clear.

HHH blocks a top rope something from Dean with a boot to the face and Evolution sends Ambrose to the floor to take over. Even Lawler gets in a shot at how out of place Batista looks in the blue. Orton comes in for the circle stomp and a mat slam gets two. Since this is such a serious match, let’s stop to talk about Bluetista being the #1 trend in the world with the announcers laughing. Ambrose sends HHH to the floor and Orton gives the boss a pep talk instead of STOPPING THE TAG. It works though as HHH gets back in for the save but the facebuster sends Dean into the ropes for his bounce back clothesline.

The hot tag brings in Reigns to clean house as everything breaks down. The apron dropkick nails Batista and the Superman Punch gets two with Orton making the save. HHH whips Rollins hard into the barricade and Ambrose gets posted. Everyone but Batista and Reigns head into the crowd and Rollins dives at HHH, only to get nailed in the head by a monitor shot from HHH. Reigns loads up the announce table but Orton saves Batista from immense pain. Orton finishes loading up the table and the TripleBomb crushes Reigns. Ambrose and Rollins are still down somewhere in the crowd and no one has been eliminated yet.

Referees come out to check on Reigns and Evolution does Shield’s pose, only to have Dean dive off the barricade to put all three down. Rollins hits the flip dive and crashes into the barricade to put everyone down. Ambrose hammers on Orton and the five still on their feet head to the entrance. Evolution is in full control with Reigns down and HHH blasts Rollins in the back with some chair shots. Orton drops Ambrose onto an open chair and Rollins is Pedigreed onto a chair as well. Reigns is all alone in the ring and Evolution slowly walks down the aisle.

The spinebuster puts Reigns down and the stomping begins. The steps are brought in and they rips Reign’s vest off. Orton throws in some kendo sticks and Reigns is laid across the steps for a caning. Batista and Orton get in their shots as this is turning into a torture scene. Now they want chairs but Reigns is to his knees. He jumps off the steps for a Superman Punch to Orton but HHH lays him out with the chair. Reigns falls to the floor and HHH hits him with the chair again.

They get back to the entrance and Ambrose is hiding behind part of the set. He springs out and attacks Evolution but he’s quickly put down by the numbers game. There are still no eliminations as Evolution surrounds Reigns. Rollins dives off the bottom of the Titantron to take all three of them down and all six are on the floor. Seth crawls back to the ring and everyone else crawls after him. Batista is in first and he spears Seth out of the air, setting up the Batista Bomb but Rollins escapes, allowing Reigns to spear Batista down for the elimination at 27:36.

An RKO out of nowhere gets two on Rollins with Reigns making the save. Orton loads up the Elevated DDT on Roman but Dean makes the save and hits Dirty Deeds on the chair to make it 3-1 at 28:43. HHH is left all alone but he hits Dean low to slow him down. A Pedigree looks to end Ambrose but Reigns hits the Superman Punch for the save. Batista spears Reigns down before leaving. Orton slides HHH the sledgehammer and Ambrose gets knocked cold. Rollins hits the top rope knee to knock HHH down though and the spear gives Reigns the final pin at 31:07.

Rating: B+. This was….long. It’s WAY better if you cut out the stupid tagging part that ate up fifteen minutes and just let them go to war. It completely misses the point of the match being ANYTHING GOES by making them stick to some structure that has no enforcement at all. The stuff after that was really good but it took too long to get there. Shield pitching a shutout should end this feud for good and hopefully it does, as there’s just no reason for them to fight again. It wasn’t as good as I was expecting due to the first half, but the stuff to end it was really good.

A lot of highlights end the show.

Overall Rating: A. This was a really solid show all around with only the decent Divas match being close to bad. Everything else was anywhere between solid to awesome with the two main events being really good stuff. Payback has been awesome both years it’s been around, despite being a glorified B show. I really liked this though and the whole thing delivered far better than I was expecting. Great stuff.

Results
Sheamus b. Cesaro – Small package
Cody Rhodes/Goldust – Shell Shock to Rhodes
Rusev b. Big E. – Accolade
Kofi Kingston b. Bo Dallas via DQ when Kane interfered
Bad News Barrett b. Rob Van Dam – Bull Hammer
John Cena b. Bray Wyatt – Wyatt couldn’t answer the ten count
Paige b. Alicia Fox – PTO
Shield b. Evolution – Spear to HHH

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Last year’s show was pretty awesome so hopefully this one lives up to it’s Papa. Let’s get to it.

We’ll start with the preshow as always. This is one of the obvious matches as there’s no way they’re unmasking Torito and take away any money they could get from selling bull masks. Hornswoggle can leave 3MB and start getting evil to promote the Leprechaun movie. The match should be fun though as both guys can actually work a match.

I’ll get the other obvious match out of the way: Rusev destroys Big E. for his first meaningful win. No questions here.

Paige retains the Divas Title. She’s too big of a deal to not get the belt here, and are people really going to complain about Alicia Fox having a push wasted? I could go for her in those white shorts again though.

Barrett beats Van Dam. There’s just no reason for RVD to win but the match should be entertaining enough.

I think Cesaro vs. Sheamus goes to a draw and Sheamus keeps the belt. Hopefully they’re not tying Cesaro down to the US Title and let him get the briefcase or maybe even the title. Either way it would seem he’s heading for a match with Brock so why give him a worthless midcard title? The match should be good though.

That leaves us with the two main events. I’m hoping Bray beats Cena, as Cena beating him for three seconds was bad enough, but keeping him down for ten seconds would just be horrible. Bray winning would allow him to do a bunch of crazy stuff that could be very interesting. I’m really not sure where he’s going, but it’s in a bad direction if Cena beats him. Also it’s not like Cena hasn’t lost a last man standing match before so this isn’t the biggest stretch in the world.

Finally, Shield almost has to beat Evolution. There’s just no reason for Evolution to win here as they have nothing to gainand with Batista likely leaving, it would be a good way to get him out. The elimination and anything goes rules should make things even more entertaining.

For a bonus, I think Bryan hands over the title, even though it means sitting through a lot of stupid drama that involves the Bellas and Stephanie getting WAY too much screen time. Bryan can bring the acting at times though and he’ll likely get a lot of time to do so tomorrow night. I still think the title goes above the ring at Money in the Bank, which should be a good way to get some people to care

Overall Payback looks predictable but entertaining. To be fair, that’s almost the same thing that was said about Wrestlemania and it was one of the best shows I’ve ever seen. This has a lot of potential to be awesome and hopefully it means we have a good summer to look forward to.

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Smackdown
Date: May 30, 2014
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final show before Payback and every major match is firmly set up for Sunday. The main story coming off Raw is Daniel Bryan having to surrender the title on Sunday or have his wife Brie Bella get fired. If nothing else we should get a solid conflicted promo tonight, which should be good coming from someone like Bryan. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Shield to get things going. Rollins says what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, so after Monday, they’ve never been stronger. We get a clip from the end of Raw and Evolution beating Shield down thanks to the sledgehammer, including a TripleBomb to put Reigns through a table. Ambrose says they don’t care how many times they get beaten down because they’ll keep fighting. The question is how crazy is Evolution willing to get because this is going to get really ugly. Seth says he’ll pin Randy Orton and a stretcher will take him to the back. Then they’ll eliminate Batista, and it’ll be HHH against all three of them.

We see a list of great Intercontinental Champions.

Cesaro vs. Kofi Kingston

A hard shoulder puts Kofi down early so he tries an armdrag. Cesaro doesn’t move and instead lifts Kofi up off the mat by the arm into a backbreaker. A gorilla press puts Kofi down again but he avoids a charge in the corner and hits a springboard right hand to the head. Kingston gets two off a kick to the head (JBL: “How do you not notice those fluorescent feet coming at you?) and goes up for cross body, only to dive into an uppercut for the pin at 2:57.

Cesaro Neutralizes him post match.

Barrett says he’ll beat Sheamus tonight to prove a point to RVD. The International Title is more prestegious than the US Title.

Paige vs. Tamina Snuka

Non-title. Alicia comes out almost immediately and takes pictures with fans. Paige loses her focus, allowing Tamina to headbutt her down to take over. Fox takes the title belt for another distraction, so Tamina kicks Paige’s head off for two. Paige gets all ticked off and fires elbows in the corner, followed by fast clotheslines and knees to the face. The Paige Turner sets up the Scorpion Cross Lock (PTO: Paige’s Tap Out) for the submission at 3:22.

Rating: C-. Now this is more like it from Paige. Instead of getting beaten up for most of the match and then making a big comeback at the end, Paige beat the tar out of Snuka for most of the match before making her tap out with ease. That’s the kind of win she’s been needing to show that she isn’t just a fluke.

Sheamus says Cesaro not shaking his hand is like feeding a Gremlin after midnight. He doesn’t know much about geography or continents, but he knows when the US Champion’s foot connects with the Intercontinental Champion’s face, it’s going to knock Barrett’s teeth down his throat.

Bo Dallas vs. Xavier Woods

Dallas starts with an armdrag and heads to the floor to celebrate. Woods grabs him but gets sent out to the floor as it’s all Bo so far. Back in and a knee drop sets up a cravate on Woods but he comes back with a clothesline and a dropkick. The Honor Roll (flipping clothesline) gets two for Woods but Bo dropkicks him out of the air, setting up the Bodog for the pin at 2:47. JBL: “It’s not 3-0. It’s 3-Bo!”

Bo does the big celebration and congratulates Woods on such a hard fought effort.

We look at the Wyatt/Cena/Lawler segment from Raw.

Video on Torito having his tail ripped off on Monday. This made me smile.

El Torito vs. Jinder Mahal

Torito has Brutus Beefcake style hedge clippers. He looks for his tail after the bell before focusing on the match. A dropkick to the leg sends Mahal into the corner and we get a chase scene. There’s a bit of cotton where the tail is growing back. An atomic drop hurts Torito really badly due to the wound but he’s able to come back with a sunset bomb, setting up the Bullsault (why not?) for the pin at 1:40.

The little guys have a showdown post match and Hornswoggle runs from the clippers.

We see a list of great US Champions to set up the champion vs. champion match next. The Intercontinental Title list really did blow this one away.

Sheamus vs. Bad News Barrett

Non-title and Heyman is on commentary and has now stretched the Streak to a twenty five year accomplishment. Cole asks Heyman which title means more and gets this great response: “Whichever is next held by a Paul Heyman Guy.” Barrett hammers away in the corner to start before taking over with a running clothesline. Bad News comes back with that cool spot where he sets himself up for a superplex but jumps down and spins into a snap suplex for two.

Sheamus’ ten forearms are broken up and Barrett knocks him to the floor for a running elbow off the apron. Back in and a running clothesline drops Barrett, followed by the rolling fireman’s carry. Barrett gets knocked to the floor and Sheamus takes him down with a shoulder from the apron. Sheamus takes too much time though and gets whipped into the steps as we take a break.

Back with Sheamus fighting out of a chinlock and nailing his running ax handles followed by the running knee lift. Sheamus charges into an elbow in the corner though and a loud low superkick gets two. An Irish Curse gets Sheamus out of trouble and the ten forearms to the chest have Barrett in trouble. White Noise is escaped though and Winds of Change get another close call. Wasteland is countered and a Brogue Kick gets the pin at 7:12 shown of 10:42.

Rating: C+. Good brawl here but again a champion, who has been on fire recently, has to get pinned. On top of that, Sheamus’ head injury from Friday was only mentioned on commentary and didn’t change anything in the match. Barrett looked good here but I don’t see the need to have him lose here. Do a double countout or something like that instead of a clean pin, but fixing that is a long lost cause in WWE.

Sheamus goes after Heyman post match but Paul talks his way to safety.

The Usos are banged up from their match on Main Event where they lost to the Wyatt Family. Tonight it’s Jimmy vs. Bray Wyatt in a last man standing match. They give a solid, fired up promo about throwing the rulebook out the window tonight.

We look at Titus O’Neil beating up Big E. a month ago.

Big E. vs. Titus O’Neil

Points to them for remembering an issue between these two. Big E. comes out with the American flag due to what happened with Rusev on Monday. The match for Sunday is official. Also before the match we get the usual from Lana, this time running down the American flag and saying Russia has the true red white and blue flag. Rusev comes out for his Russian speech and Titus uses the distraction to jump Big E. That lasts a few seconds before Big E. comes back with a belly to belly suplex and the running body attack. The Warrior Splash sets up the Big Ending for the pin at 1:11.

Big E. waves the flag like a Real American.

Adam Rose vs. Jack Swagger

This doesn’t make the pay per view? Colter is on commentary and Swagger gets a jobber entrance while we look at what happened between these two on Monday. Colter wants Rose deported and the party people arrested for impersonating human beings. Rose runs around with the lollipop in his mouth to start and offers it to Swagger. Jack charges but is easily sidestepped before Rose jumps into Swagger’s arms. Swagger has no idea what to think and bails to the floor where Rose quickly follows. Back in and Jack tries a monkey flip but Rose dives forward to pull Jack’s legs forward for a pin at 2:18.

The Raw ReBound covers the Bryan/Stephanie segment from Raw.

Bray Wyatt vs. Jimmy Uso

Last man standing. Bray hammers on Jimmy in the corner to start before running him over with a shoulder block. A dropkick puts Jimmy on the floor and a big dive takes him down again but Bray is quickly back up. Back from a break with Bray hitting a running splash in the corner but Jimmy fires off some right hands. Bray plants him with his suplex slam and hammers away, only to walk into a Samoan drop.

That doesn’t keep Bray down either but he gets low bridged out to the floor. Jimmy tries a running dive off the barricade but Wyatt ducks underneath, only to walk into a huge superkick for seven. Back in and Bray hits that running cross body, followed by the Spider Walk out of the corner. Jimmy headbutts out of a superplex and nails the Superfly Splash for a count of eight but Bray is mad.

He throws Jimmy out to the floor but the Uso catches him with a jumping enziguri. The running Umaga attack against the barricade has Bray in big trouble but he uses the steps to get up at nine. The Family takes out Jey but Jimmy nails Wyatt with another superkick, only to have another Umaga attack hit the steps. Sister Abigail on the floor is good for the win at 12:03 as Bray hangs upside down from the apron and counts along.

Rating: B. This was WAY better than I was expecting as Bray was actually tested a bit. I don’t think anyone in their right mind expected Jimmy to win here but they made something out of it and that’s the best thing you can do in a match where the ending is fairly obvious. This was a very nice surprise and a good sign for the Usos’ futures.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a pretty standard go home show with a solid main event. Almost every match got some build and that’s really all you can ask for out of this kind of show. There’s nothing on here worth going out of your way to watch, though the main event was solid stuff. Other than that though, there are too many short matches here to really work for me.

Results
Cesaro b. Kofi Kingston – Uppercut
Paige b. Tamina Snuka – Scorpion Cross Lock
Bo Dallas b. Xavier Woods – Bodog
El Torito b. Jinder Mahal – Bullsault
Sheamus b. Bad News Barrett – Brogue Kick
Big E. b. Titus O’Neil – Big Ending
Adam Rose b. Jack Swagger – Bridging cradle
Bray Wyatt b. Jimmy Uso – Uso couldn’t answer a ten count after Sister Abigail on the floor

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Smackdown
Date: May 23, 2014
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the second straight show in this building as we wrap up the European tour. As is usually the case with Smackdown, this is just a holding show until we get back to America to find out what happens to Bryan and the title. Other than that we’re likely to get a bit more on the Shield vs. Evolution match as we’re closing in on their showdown at Payback. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

We open with Jimmy Hart, introducing Hogan to a WWE ring in England for the first time in over 20 years. Hogan says it’s great to be back here like in the old days. Speaking of the old days, Hogan talks about Jimmy not being the same since he started living in the Legends House. Hogan explains the show and lists off the bigger names in the cast. That’s about the past though and Hogan wants to look towards the future. The WWE Network is coming to the UK….at some point in the future. We’re already on the road to Wrestlemania XXXI and that’s about it.

We look at Shield vs. Evolution over the last few months.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Batista

No DQ after Batista hit Ziggler low last week. Ziggler nails a dropkick to start and chokes Batista on the apron. Big Dave comes back with a huge spinebuster for two and Ziggler is already in trouble. The first weapon is brought in as Batista gets a chair but Ziggler takes it away. That’s fine with Batista as he sends Dolph into the announce table and apron. Dolph sidesteps a charging Animal to send him into the barricade before clotheslining Batista into the timekeeper’s area.

We take a break and come back with Batista hitting the post with a chair. Dolph picks up the chair and blasts Dave in the back a few times to take over. Batista tries to walk away but gets forearmed in the back of the head and sent into the steps. Good brawl so far. Back in and Ziggler hammers away in the corner, making sure to wrap Batista’s arm around the ropes so he can’t hit Dolph low like he did last week. Nice job with the continuity.

Ziggler rolls through the spinebuster into a sunset flip and the Fameasser gets two. A baseball slide knocks Batista over the announce table and the announcers get knocked out. JBL: “Michael quit loafing on the job! Just because you got hit by everything!” Batista reverses a whip into the steps and slams Ziggler down onto the steps. Ziggler uses a low blow of his own to counter a Batista Bomb onto the steps but misses a running Fameasser off the apron onto the steps. Dolph’s knee is hurt so Batista throws him back in and nails the spear for the pin at 12:00.

Rating: B+. This was really good stuff with Ziggler being more than game against Batista. It’s amazing how different Ziggler is on the two shows. On Raw he can barely survive five minutes against Mark Henry but here he’s going toe to toe with Batista for a long TV match. The psychology was good here too and the power vs. speed formula was solid. I’ve always liked these two together and this was no exception.

Batista powerbombs Ziggler post match.

Bolieve! Tonight.

Nikki Bella/Eva Marie vs. Funkadactyls

Summer Rae is guest referee for the Total Divas special and is looking very good in the outfit. Nikki takes Naomi down with an armdrag to start as Cole tries to explain the stories on Total Divas. A facebuster puts Naomi down but Summer won’t count at all. The Funkadactyls hit a double suplex and a double split legdrop before Cameron is in on her own to no reaction. Off to Eva whose outfit matches her partner. Summer still won’t count, allowing Cameron to roll Eva up for a count that would make evil Teddy Long jealous and the pin at 1:58.

Eva glares at Summer post match.

Clip from the breast cancer rally with John Cena in attendance.

Bo Dallas vs. Sin Cara

Bo kneels in prayer before the match which JBL makes sure to point out. Before the match he talks about how we can all achieve our dreams if we just Bolieve. A quick armdrag puts Cara down and he jumps around in a circle to celebrate. They trade arm work with Dallas’ armbar being quickly broken. Dallas drives a knee into Cara’s face and a second one into the ribs. Sin Cara comes back with a flying headbutt and a springboard middle rope cross body. A Tajiri elbow gets two on Bo and a kick to the face drops him as well. Dallas avoids the Swanton and walks the corner for a bulldog and the pin at 3:35.

Rating: D+. Dallas isn’t great in the ring but he’s all mic work and character anyway. If they let him do stuff like he did in NXT and cut those WAY over the top promos he’ll have people booing him out of the building (in a good way) by the end of the summer. Good debut here but the promos are the key to his character.

Post match Bo helps Sin Cara up. “Keep trying. Maybe someday you can be like ME!”

We’ve got Wyatts in the ring. Bray says he’s seen the ups and downs of our world such as poverty and disease. When he closes his eyes he can hear us calling out to him. Most of us never have to see those horrible things, or only from our homes as we eat a bowl of cereal. Evil is real, even though we live in a bubble that is meant to be our home. We have become prisoners to society because that is what they want.

As soon as eyebrows are raised, someone like John Cena is sent in to be our hope and tell us that everything is going to be afraid. It’s our home and not a prison he says. Bray thinks Cena has lied to our children long enough. That’s why he’s been put here. Come gather around children and let’s have a look. We see a clip of the Family destroying Cena to end Raw. Back live and Bray says the Cenation has infected us like the Plague.

A simple ten count will get rid of everything Cena stands for and that’s why Cena has recruited the Usos to be his new pawns. They’ll be thrown on the front lines so Cena’s crown doesn’t get too dirty. Tonight Bray’s brothers will show the Usos that a beast that does not fear cannot be tamed. There are worse things in the world than dying. When your city burned, Bray was there. When your lives crumble, Bray was there. And when John Cena falls, Bray will be there. Bray says he’s always been and starts speaking in tongues. He drops to his knees and starts singing the song.

Sheamus vs. Alberto Del Rio

Non-title with Cesaro and Heyman on commentary. The bell rings and Cesaro offers to shake Sheamus’ hand, allowing Del Rio to get in a cheap shot from behind. Heyman and Cole argue over what language Cesaro should speak on commentary as Sheamus hammers away in the corner. Del Rio comes back with a snapmare and low dropkick for one. Cesaro speaks all of his other languages as Sheamus comes back with a knee drop for a near fall of his own.

The rolling fireman’s carry and a clothesline put Del Rio on the floor as the announcers are talking about Jack Benny. Del Rio comes back with a wicked running enziguri on the floor to take over. Back from a break with Del Rio being sent to the apron but snapping Sheamus’ throat across the top rope. Sheamus comes back with a knee in the corner but a Backstabber gets two for Del Rio.

The Irish Curse gets the same for Sheamus but both guys miss their finishers. A low superkick gets two on the champion but Del Rio misses a charge and gets caught by the ten forearms to the chest. Back in and Alberto grabs the armbreaker but Sheamus gets his feet in the ropes. Cesaro goes after Sheamus and gets kicked in the face. He interferes again and that’s a DQ at 9:31.

Rating: C. I really don’t get why Del Rio couldn’t take a fall here. The match was fine for the most part and one of their better matches, likely due to it not having as much time. There was also a chance that Del Rio could win a non-title match as opposed to beating Sheamus to become World Champion.

Cesaro Neutralizes Sheamus on the floor. Heyman claims self-defense.

We look back at Raw to see Stephanie demand that Bryan vacate the title next week.

Here’s Vickie Guerrero with something to say. She says people only know one side of her because she has great personal skills and is straight up gorgeous. She can also party with the best of them, so please welcome Adam Rose. JBL: “DON’T DO IT VICKIE! We need Glenn Close to get rid of that bunny!”

Vickie snaps her fingers to the music and smiles a lot. Rose has a very important question for Vickie: is she a lemon or a rosebud? The fans think Vickie is a lemon and a YES chant starts up to confirm it. Vickie tells him to get out but Rose tries to give her his lollipop. Rose scares her enough that she falls off the apron and is carried off by the party.

The Usos talk about Adam Rose for a bit before saying unlike the Wyatts, they’re a real family, back to when they were baby Usos playing in the sandbox. They bring in their brother from another mother, John Cena. Cena sounds like he’s imitating various people’s promos, such as Hawk (WELLLLL) and Hogan (“Let you tell me something brother”. Yes I meant to type it that way) and is a bit off at the same time.

He has some things he needs to put on his chest and he knows who makes the pants around here. Listen to him when he’s watching you because it’s time to put the dinner to bed and go hunting for babies. Jey: “We have no idea what you’re talking about.” Cena: “Maybe I do or maybe I do.” The point is anyone can talk but actions speak louder than words. They do that weird chest pounding thing as they walk away.

Usos vs. Wyatt Family

Non-title with Cena and Bray as seconds. Harper stands there with the blank look on his face so Jey shouts at him. Luke takes him into the corner but the Usos make a blind tag, allowing Jey to kick Harper into a sunset flip for two. Rowan comes in but gets chopped up against the ropes. The Usos make more tags to double team Rowan and Jey cross bodies him out to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Jimmy dropkicking Rowan down and stomping away but Erick easily fights back and brings in Harper. Luke gets kicked in the ribs but sidesteps a charging Jimmy to send him throat first into the middle rope. Back to Rowan for the knuckle skull crush as the fans are singing the song. Harper comes in again as the announcers argue over whether Bray said he was evil or not.

A superplex attempt is countered and Jimmy nails a Whisper in the Wind, allowing for the hot tag to Jey. Everything breaks down and Jey hits the running Umaga attack in the corner but gets kicked in the face by Harper. Harper goes to the floor and gets taken down by the suicide dive. Jey dives over the post to take out his brother and Harper at the same time. Back in and Jey loads up the Superfly Splash but Bray shoves him off the top for the DQ at 10:05.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t bad but the DQ endings are getting annoying in a hurry. This does leave the door open for a rematch though and the titles can be on the line. It’s a power vs. speed match so I can’t complain all that much. I can’t imagine the rematch doesn’t take place at Payback.

Cena gives Rowan an AA and stares down Wyatt. Bray teases getting in but backs off to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was the night of long matches but unfortunately two of them had weak finishes. The tag match I can excuse as it’s there to set up a rematch, but I see no reason why Del Rio couldn’t take a fall and have Cesaro do the same stuff after the match. Other than that the show wasn’t bad and advanced the stories for Payback. As awesome as it is, it’s kind of nice to get a breather from the Shield vs. Evolution feud for a night too.

Results
Batista b. Dolph Ziggler – Spear
Funkadactyls b. Nikki Bella/Eva Marie – Rollup to Eva
Bo Dallas b. Sin Cara – Corner bulldog
Sheamus b. Alberto Del Rio via disqualification when Cesaro interfered
Usos b. Wyatt Family via DQ when Bray Wyatt interfered

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