Monday Night Raw – April 23, 2012: Starring Brock Lesnar

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 23, 2012
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s a three hour show in Detroit tonight. In theory this was going to be the Draft but with the Super Show having guys from both shows on it, there’s no real need to have one. Del Rio was officially traded to Smackdown so they could probably have things like that instead of wasting a full show on a Draft. That’s probably a good idea as you can use time on other stuff. Today is also Cena’s birthday if that means anything. Let’s get to it.

Let’s burn it to the ground.

We open with the Lesnar vs. Cena contract signing, moderated by Teddy Long. Teddy screws up something about the number of titles Cena has won, because CLEARLY which title he’s won makes a difference right? Brock gets his entrance but it’s Ace instead. Brock isn’t here yet so the signing will be later. Also tonight might be Cena’s last night on Raw, so get out of his ring.

Ace goes to leave…..and here’s Edge. He says he’s off his contract in a few days after this but he’s here to talk to Cena. However this isn’t the real Cena standing in front of him. Edge came to talk to the John Cena who is his greatest rival ever in the WWE. The real Cena is the one that beat him at TLC in Toronto and threw him in the Long Island Sound. Maybe it was Rock beating him that changed Cena, because big losses can change people, like Andre losing to Hogan and the Screwjob and such.

Cena has to find what’s inside of him because this is all that both Edge and Cena have ever done. This isn’t what Lesnar is all about. He doesn’t care about these people unless they can line his pockets. Brock was gone for eight years while Cena and Edge were carrying the load. A loss to Lesnar is a slap in the face of guys like Undertaker, Michaels and Edge, so Cena needs to wake up. He isn’t asking Cena to beat Lesnar. He’s telling him to. This was pretty freaking awesome.

Chris Jericho vs. Kofi Kingston

Kofi quickly knocks him to the floor and has to do the hair bounce off the top rope thing because Jericho moved out of the way. Back in Jericho easily takes over and chops Kofi down before hooking a headlock. A charge into the corner misses and Jericho is knocked to the floor. Kofi hits a HUGE flip dive over the top which looked awesome. Chris is down as we take a break.

Back with Jericho holding a chinlock (duh) due to the springboard dropkick during the break. The bulldog puts Kofi down but the Lionsault misses. Standing rana gets two for Kofi but Chris hits a clothesline to take him down. Kofi pops back up for the top rope cross body and the SOS for two each. Trouble in Paradise is countered into a Walls attempt but Kofi escapes. He tries a springboard something but jumps into the Codebreaker. Liontamer ends this at 12:00.

Rating: B-. This was getting really good by the end. Kofi is great in this spot and I’d have few problems if he stayed here for awhile. He can be given a quick push if need be but he’s fitting in very well as a high flying jobber to the stars. There’s nothing wrong with being in this place on the card for a long stretch as a lot of people have had fine careers here.

Jericho says he’s going to win the title on Sunday and has a present for Punk when his title reign ends.

We get a clip of Lesnar debuting (in the ring) against Jeff Hardy and winning by KO at Backlash 2002.

Ace is on the phone when Eve comes in. He tells her to call him Johnny and offers her an opening in his administration. The job would be Executive Administrator which she accepts. He wants a hug but gets a handshake instead.

We get some of the sitdown interview from last week with Lesnar.

Punk is in the back and his gift is a big basket of liquor. Punk keeps one bottle which he says he’ll give to Jericho at the PPV and gives the rest of the basket to Josh. This could be interesting.

Lord Tensai vs. R-Truth

This is kind of a drop in opponent quality for Tensai. Tensai’s inset promo is mostly in Japanese. Tensai no sells a lot of Truth’s offense and runs him over. He fires off the headbutts in the corner and Truth is in trouble. Backsplash hits and the Baldo Bomb sets up the Mist Claw for the win at 2:00.

Here’s Kane to talk about the match on Sunday with Orton. Orton can’t beat Kane with rules as was proven at Wrestlemania so why would he think that he can beat Kane without them? Orton is struggling with humanity and hates that Kane has discovered his one true weakness. Kane has found Orton’s shoulders? He calls Randy a scared boy looking for his father. Orton pops up on the screen and says he wants to get into this too. Behind him is Paul Bearer tied up in a chair. Orton throws him inside what looks like a freezer. Kane says he doesn’t care because his father is the devil himself.

Kane goes to leave but Orton comes up the aisle for a slugout. Kane gets rammed into the steps and then the post with a good looking shot. Orton finds a pipe from somewhere and beats Kane up with it, sending Kane up through the crowd.

Jericho is in the back and runs into Alex Riley, who says he thinks Punk is drinking from the bottle of alcohol he was given. They go to his locker room and see him on the phone having a drink from a red cup with the bottle next to it, but you can’t tell what’s in the cup. Jericho looks happily stunned.

Alberto Del Rio/Cody Rhodes vs. Big Show/Great Khali

Cody vs. Show II is announced for the PPV and the stipulation is to be determined. They don’t know it by now? That can’t be a good sign. Khali is limping from the attack on Friday. He and Cody start and Cody’s kick is easily countered. Khali goes after the knee of Cody but when he loads up the chop Cody bails to the floor. Back inside Rhodes immediately tags out and Alberto fires a kick to the knee. That gets him nowhere other than into the corner for some chops.

We take a break and come back with the hot tag to Big show so he can beat on Del Rio. Cody pulls the rope down and sends Show to the floor for some work on the knee. The heels work over the knee with Cody hooking the Figure Four. It’s not as bad as the one from Friday but it’s still pretty bad. Show comes back and Del Rio walks out, allowing the chokeslam to pin Cody at 10:20.

Rating: D+. Oh good freaking grief this company makes my head HURT. There’s a title match on Sunday (one of five total on the show I believe) and they decide to have the champion, who has dominated the challenger for a month now, dominate him again. I mean, heaven forbid that Khali gets pinned or that Big Show takes a fluke fall to make us think that Cody has a chance right?

Santino defends the US Title against Miz on the pre-show on Sunday, because THE UNITED STATES TITLE ISN’T IMPORTANT ENOUGH TO PUT ON A FREAKING PAY PER VIEW!

Jericho is with Ace, Eve and Teddy, saying that Punk needs to be stripped of the title. Eve says that there’s a WWE rule saying that you can’t drink alcohol within 12 hours of a WWE show. There’s going to be a field sobriety test later. Jericho leaves and Teddy gets yelled at for not following the rules. He gets to administer the test later and possibly strip Punk of the title.

Lesnar is here and shoves Josh against a wall. Brock walks away and Josh says he’s just trying to do his job, which earns him a trip through the interview set.

Back from a break and Josh is being put on a stretcher.

Divas Title: Nikki Bella vs. Beth Phoenix

Before the match here’s Eve to say that this is now a lumberjack match. Maxine is one of the divas here so I’m sure she’ll be complaining about not being off NXT yet this week again. Nikki dropkicks Beth down and monkey flips her down. That results in her getting slammed into the corner and gorilla press dropped. Off to a chinlock followed by a backbreaker. Beth throws her to the floor and injures her knee. Brie goes after Beth and the lumberjacks jump on Beth in a dog pile. I think there was a switch in the pile but I’m not sure. Beth’s ankle or leg is messed up, allowing Nikki to roll her up and win the title at 4:11.

Rating: D. The girls looked good, the match was the usual Diva stuff, the whole deal with the Bellas leaving soon is now up in the air, I still don’t care about the Divas. Next. Oh and the leg injury appears to be real.

Punk freaks out and breaks stuff because he has to have a sobriety test.

Here’s Teddy with two cops for the sobriety test. Jericho comes out to observe this. Punk comes out and is acting shaky because he’s drunk you see. He drops the belt as he’s standing in the ring. It’s not Hawk in 98 bad but I don’t see a clear ending to this. Punk talks about how ridiculous this is, and the whole WWF (yes WWF) Universe says this is ridiculous. First up is he has to recite the alphabet backwards. He can’t do it and says it’s stupid because no one can do that sober or drunk.

Next up is walking a red line that’s in the ring. “I’ve seen Cops before. This is easy.” He does a Karate Kid impression but can’t do this either. The second officer says that Punk is obviously intoxicated and the cops are sent away. Teddy asks for the title and Punk doesn’t want to do it of course. He hands Teddy the title but before it goes to Jericho Punk wants one more chance. He tries to do the alphabet backwards again and does it very slowly (messing up the S and the T) but does it at the same time as walking a straight line, before moonwalking and strutting through the end. Punk gets it right and destroys Jericho.

Clip of Lesnar destroying Hogan on Smackdown. I really don’t get why this is supposed to be a big deal.

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

Daniel Bryan gets to be guest referee. They trade power to start but Bryan stops him from throwing a punch. Remember that Sheamus is on the referee probation. Henry runs Sheamus over and covers with Bryan counting the pin in less than a second, ending it at 1:36.

Post match Sheamus goes after Bryan but has to kick Henry’s head off first. He takes Sheamus’ knee out and kicks him in the head before putting on the YES Lock.

Brodus/Horny vs. Ziggler/Swagger later on has its own sponsor: Taco Bell.

Back from a break Sheamu

s thinks Bryan is a coward and a snake in the grass. He’s going to get the same treatment that the snakes in Ireland got, but Sheamus is no saint. I like Sheamus A LOT more (which is saying a lot as he might be my favorite wrestler right now) when he has some adversity instead of just plowing over everyone.

Primo/Epico vs. Zach Ryder/Santino Marella

Ryder and Epico start things off with Zach taking over with an armbar. He sends Epico into the corner and hits the boot but Rosa distracts him from hitting the Rough Ryder. Out to the floor and Ryder gets sent into the post which gets one in the ring. The champs hammer away on him but Primo misses a springboard flip dive, allowing the hot tag to Santino. He loads up the Cobra as Ryder takes out Epico. Primo dropkicks Santino down but Santino backflips to his feet and the Cobra gets the pin at 3:18. It was stupid but I found it funny so that’s all that matters.

Rating: C-. I have no idea what to think of this. On one hand I’m glad Ryder isn’t getting destroyed by another main event guy, but at the same time the tag titles are about as valuable as the CWF Bahamanian Title right now. Then again, the titles have been dead for a long time now so I think it’s excusable.

Kane sneaks into the freezer and gets Paul out. Paul thanks him for saving him, but Kane shoves him back in again. Ok then.

Epico and Primo are arguing when Abraham Washington comes in and wants to know why they’re being treated like jokes who can’t get on Wrestlemania or can’t get an entrance. He gives them his card and they seem interested.

Brodus Clay/Hornswoggle vs. Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger

This is presented by Taco Bell. Whatever pays the bills. Horny starts with Swagger before it’s off to Dolph. He stands on Horny’s head but Horny comes back with a headscissors. Off to Brodus vs. Swagger and the fat dancing dinosaur from another planet runs over the All American Hitler Youth. Vickie comes in for the DQ at 1:55.

Horny, the dancers and Brodus surround her but she goes to get Brodus’ hat and puts it on Clay’s head. Horny bites her and that’s it.

Lesnar headlined Mania 19. His concussion isn’t mentioned or shown.

Here’s the rest of the interview with Brock last week.

Ace comes out to run the contract signing. Brock comes out to a decent pop. And there’s no Cena. Lesnar calls him out but there’s still no Cena. Brock gets in Ace’s face a bit but says that he needs to talk about why Brock was late earlier today. He asks Ace to sit down and talk about some changes that Lesnar wants and needs. Since he’s been back, he’s not happy with how things are going.

Brock has some demands/requests that Ace is going to have to sign off on them. He has a copy of those changes that have to go through before Sunday, preferably right now or he’s not signing to face Cena. Brock says he’s not a naive farm boy like he was eight years ago. Instead he knows this company needs him. If he’s going to be the face of the company, he wants all of Ace’s ideas run by him first. He wants Vince’s private jet to and from the venues for Raw.

Beating people up makes him happy, so when he got he got here and had to deal with what he hates, that being stupid people, he beat someone up. He’ll show up on Raw when and how he wants. Ace can’t fine Brock like he did Sheamus and Brock wants more money also. Until those demands are met, there’s no match on Sunday. Oh and the show needs to be called Monday Night Raw Starring Brock Lesnar. Ace shakes his hand and says he agrees to those terms. Brock signs and here comes Cena.

Cena has the chain and the lock around his neck. I think this is Serious Cena. He has the chain in his hand now and looks at the contract but doesn’t sign it yet. Cena looks at it again but still won’t sign. Lesnar taunts him and Cena takes the contract out of the folder. Brock says he likes the feeling he’s getting from Cena because it feels like it’s real.

He says Cena is scared and that he’s the reason Cena lost last week. He keeps saying Cena is scared which makes Cena sign. Cena has the right hand with the chain cocked back and Brock has his hand cocked as well. There goes the table but Brock smiles and shakes his finger no. Cena never said a word. Brock leaves to a ton of booing for the first time since he’s been back. And we’re done with a 15 minute overrun.

Overall Rating: B. I liked this show as it felt like a go home show. Instead of your usual stuff, we got a lot of solid build to the major matches. Why was it solid? BECAUSE IT WASN’T ALL THE SAME! They mixed stuff up, like with the two world title matches. It’s so refreshing to see something different like that instead of the same stuff time after time.

Results
Chris Jericho b. Kofi Kingston – Walls of Jericho
Lord Tensai b. R-Truth – Claw Hold
Big Show/Great Khali b. Cody Rhodes/Alberto Del Rio – Chokeslam to Rhodes
Nikki Bella b. Beth Phoenix – Rollup
Mark Henry b. Sheamus – Clothesline
Zach Ryder/Santino Marella b. Epico/Primo – Cobra to Primo
Brodus Clay/Hornswoggle b. Jack Swagger/Dolph Ziggler via DQ when Vickie Guerrero interfered

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Smackdown – April 20, 2012: Cody Saves Us From The Curse Of Khali

Smackdown
Date: April 20, 2012
Location: O2 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Josh Matthews

We’re still in England this week for the last TV show of the tour. I don’t remember anything being announced for tonight’s show so I’m really not sure what to expect from it. We’ll probably get more build to Bryan vs. Sheamus as well as hopefully a few more matches added to the thin card. Let’s get to it.

Do you know your enemy? Mine is an annoying piece of malware at the moment.

There’s a six man tag main event: Cody/Bryan/Henry vs. Orton/Sheamus/Khali.

Here’s Bryan to open the show. He talks about how Sheamus didn’t do anything better than him at Wrestlemania. Instead of facing him like a man, Sheamus took the coward’s way out and jumped Bryan from behind like he’s done to everyone. At Extreme Rules he won’t get jumped or be distracted. So now it’s back to Chicago where he shocked the world by winning the MITB case. He’ll beat Sheamus twice in the two out of three falls match and get back his rightful title. Did Sheamus cheat at Wrestlemania? YES! Will Bryan win the title back at Extreme Rules? YES!

Cue AJ to a lot of booing. How can you boo someone that looks like that? Bryan tells her to turn around and go away but she says this is the only way she can talk to him. AJ asks if she can just talk to him about their problems but Bryan says he has no problems. He had one, but he got rid of her. Bryan regrets ever going out with her in the first place and he wishes that she was never even born. That finally gets the people to boo Bryan. He asks if there’s any chance he’d ever take AJ back and answers with an emphatic NO before leaving.

AJ vs. Natalya

AJ starts off all stoic but suddenly explodes on Natalya, beating her into the corner. The referee pulls her off twice but AJ won’t let up, drawing a DQ at 48 seconds.

Damien Sandow talks about something Benjamin Franklin said and runs down Dancing With The Stars and Hoarders. At least with Dancing it’s about something that involves work and talent. Most of the other shows he criticizes I completely agree with him on.

Brodus Clay vs. Hunico

Brodus has something to say. He says cut the music and gets booed, prompting him to say it’s coming, so don’t worry. His little brother is supposed to be here so he sends the Funkadactyls (the girls) to go find him. And it’s Horny. Cole’s reaction is exactly what mind is. At least the Mama and the Bridge Club was something original. Brodus does his shaking and Horny gets in to do it as well. Hunico becomes my new hero by shoving him down. The squash commences and the splash ends it in 1:10, about 25 seconds of which was spent on the Hornswoggle part.

Horny hits the Tadpole Splash post match. I hope this isn’t permanent.

Teddy is looking for Aksana but finds Titus and Young who are new to Smackdown. They laugh at him for not signing them and now being a gopher. Ace pops up and they all make fun of Teddy. Titus/Young leave so Ace puts one of those big black furry Queen’s guard hats on Teddy who isn’t allowed to talk or move for the rest of the night.

Orton is in the back with Striker and we get a video on the attack on Cowboy Bob last week. Orton, with his growing mutton chops, says that his dad will be fine. On the other hand, Kane isn’t going to be fine. They have a match at Extreme Rules and it’s falls count anywhere.

Usos vs. Titus O’Neal/Darren Young

NXT comes to Fridays. I forgot how annoying Titus’ song was. Young starts with Jimmy who hits a spinning forearm for two. Off to Jey who hits some double chops before bringing Jimmy back in. Titus comes in and the fans do not care at all. He uses his power stuff and gets a small reaction off a European Uppercut. Back to Young who hits a neckbreaker for two. The fans are waking up a bit. A tag brings in Jimmy who gets the only solid reaction for the US shout to the crowd. Jey gets sent to the floor and a blind tag allows Young and Titus to hit a Hart Attack out of the corner for the pin.

Rating: D. It might be because I watched these teams fight so many times on NXT but I didn’t care at all about this match. Titus is ok but Young is so uninteresting that it stuns me that he got a main roster spot. I guess having another tag team on the show is good but this match is nothing of note. Another loss for the Usos doesn’t please me either.

The Raw ReBound is about Jericho vs. Punk.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Big Show

Non-title. Del Rio drives an Aston Martin here which is very appropriate. Del Rio has officially been traded to the Smackdown roster with no compensation announced yet. Big Show blocks Del Rio’s offense out of the corner and shoves him down. Show stands on his chest in the corner and chops it for good measure. An elbow follows for two. Show loads up the big punch but Del Rio kicks him in the knee to take him down.

More kicks to the arm by Del Rio follow and he hooks an armbar. Show shrugs it off but the chokeslam is broken up by a kick to the knee. The Codebreaker to the arm sets up the armbreaker but Show lifts him up with the bad arm into kind of an Angle Slam minus the spin. Show spears him down and calls for the chokeslam. Ricardo gets up on the apron and Cody comes in with the Disaster Kick, giving Del Rio the pin.

Rating: C-. Does any champion other than the world champions EVER get to pin someone? Oh right: Santino does. For the life of me I don’t get the point of why they keep having the champs lose. Have Cody come in for a DQ or something when Show has the match won. One of the biggest reasons the titles mean nothing is the champions lose every time and it’s frustrating because there are other ways to do the same story without having them lose like Show did here.

Cody runs away post match.

Drew McIntyre and Heath Slater are watching the following squash.

Danny Lerman vs. Ryback

Same deal as always but this time it’s a British guy. Lerman hits him and is promptly mangled. Clothesline and MuscleBuster variation win in 1:11.

We get the Brock interview from Raw.

Teddy is still standing in the same place although he’s now in a full uniform. Regal pops up for some jokes and leaves. Aksana’s music hits and HOKEY SMOKE THAT’S CLAUDIO CASTAGNOLI! He’s playing the Antonio Cesaro character here, a European rugby player. Ace pops out of his office and invites them in. I’m not British so maybe I don’t get it, but what’s the point of guards that aren’t allowed to move? Couldn’t that create some security risks?

Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes/Mark Henry vs. Sheamus/Great Khali/Randy Orton

Main event time. Cody jumps Khali and hits him in the knee as Khali is getting in. Trainers come out and say Khali can’t go. Big Show comes out to replace him.

Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes/Mark Henry vs. Sheamus/Big Show/Randy Orton

The match is joined in progress after a break with Randy pounding on Bryan in the corner. Tag to Sheamus so Bryan bails to the corner to tag in Cody. The champ knocks Cody around and hits the rolling fireman’s carry slam for two. Cody’s neckbreaker is countered and Sheamus throws him into position for the ten forearms. Cody reverses a suplex and sends Sheamus to the floor. A baseball slide by Cody sets up the knee off the apron from Bryan, which I think is the same thing that’s happened to him for three or four weeks in a row.

Bryan comes in to stomp on Sheamus now with a YES for each connecting boot. Henry comes in for some choking and it’s back to Rhodes. He works on the arm of the champ and then into a chinlock. Sheamus fights out of that as well and knocks Cody out of the air on the Disaster Kick attempt. Hot tag to Orton and it’s powerslams for all normal sized heels. Cody gets in a shot though and it’s time for a break.

Back with Henry holding Orton in a neck crank and it’s back to Bryan. A running dropkick in the corner gets two. A top rope splash misses and Orton makes the tag to Big Show who faces Henry. Cody manages a knee to the back and Mark clotheslines Show down. The heels beat on him and Cody hooks a figure four that his daddy would be ashamed of. While the hold is still on, Cody makes a tag to Henry who splashes Show for two.

Bryan drops an elbow for two. Hot tag to Sheamus to meet Bryan and the beating is on. Irish Curse gets two with Cody making the save. Rhodes rolls to the floor and lands right in front of Show who knocks him out cold with the WMD. YES Lock is blocked by Sheamus but the Brogue Kick misses as well. Tag to Henry and Sheamus kicks his head off. Show adds the right hand and the RKO gets the pin at 13:20 shown of at least 16:50.

Rating: B. That’s probably high but I was getting into this match at the end. First of all, the right guy got pinned. There would have been no reason to have Bryan or Cody lose before the PPV so Henry was the right choice. Second, they changed up the formula by having each good guy be in trouble which made the match more fleshed out and told a better story. Also the total destruction of Henry at the end was a nice touch.

Show was limping post match.

Overall Rating: B. This was a solid episode as everything moved pretty smoothly and a lot of people got on TV. We had a debut and a solid main event, plus a new match added to the PPV with Kane vs. Orton. The one thing I’m concerned about is we seem to only have five matches (Brock/Cena, Kane/Orton, Jericho/Punk, Sheamus/Bryan and presumably Cody/Show) and there’s a week left. They’ll need to add two or three matches in two shows which is possible but a bit rushed. Still though, good show tonight.

Results
Natalya b. AJ via DQ when AJ wouldn’t stop attacking Natalya in the corner
Brodus Clay b. Hunico – Big Splash
Titus O’Neal/Darren Young b. Usos – Hart Attack out of the corner
Alberto Del Rio b. Big Show – Pin after a Disaster Kick from Cody Rhodes
Ryback b. Danny Lerman – MuscleBuster
Big Show/Randy Orton/Sheamus b. Mark Henry/Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes – RKO to Henry

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Monday Night Raw – April 16, 2012: Yes, With A British Accent

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 16, 2012
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re in England and on taped delay tonight which usually slows things down a lot. From what I can tell, Lesnar won’t be here tonight which is possibly a good thing. If nothing else maybe he can hit the gym tonight for a change. There’s probably going to be a title change of some sort, although not in the Henry vs. Punk match. The main events are usually strong in England though so let’s get to it.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Mark Henry

No intro for Henry. This is No DQ and No Countout due to Punk retaining by both of those means before. Big reaction for Punk on the big match intros. Henry takes him into the corner to start so Punk fires off kicks to the knee. He walks into a kind of spinebuster though and Mark kicks him to the floor. Punk speeds things up and slides back in before diving back out for a suicide dive.

Henry shrugs off some more kicks but Punk gets up a boot to stop a charging challenger. Punk channels his inner Hardy by running the railing but goes much further before hitting a bulldog. He can’t get Henry back in though so he fires off more kicks. Henry grabs the leg and swings Punk into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Punk caught in a neck crank and being run over by a clothesline/shoulder block. Punk rolls outside and grabs a chair for a few shots which get him a two count. Punk charges at him again with the chair but gets kicked down. Now Henry gets the chair and drills it into Punk’s back. He wedges the chair between the top and middle rope but Punk blocks the shot and comes back with kicks in the corner.

Henry runs Punk over again to come back and it’s off to a bearhug. Punk elbows out of it and hits a short DDT for two. Punk goes to the corner but springboards into World’s Strongest Slam position. He jumps out of it though and the high kick puts Henry into the corner. The knee/bulldog combo is countered (duh) but Punk trips him into the wedged chair which knocks Henry out. Punk grabs the chair and goes up, coming off with it like an elbow, Cactus Jack style, good for the pin at 13:12.

Rating: B-. These two have some solid chemistry together. I was wondering how Punk was going to be able to pull this off which is exactly what a match like this is supposed to make me wonder. This worked quite well and I was getting into it at the end. Henry was doing his usual stuff but having someone like Punk in there to keep the fans going made the whole thing work. Good stuff.

Jericho pops up on screen at a bar and says that he’s got a rematch for the title at Extreme Rules in a Chicago street fight. Punk says that’s cool because he’ll take Jericho apart in the streets of Chicago. Jericho says just show up sober and he shows us a clip of Punk going into a pub from earlier in the day. Jericho thinks Punk is drunk right now. Punk says his friends are drinkers and he can go in with them and have some fish and chips. Jericho says Punk sounds like his father and that the straightedge is just a facade now. Punk gets ready to respond but the screen cuts away.

R-Truth is dressed up like Sherlock Holmes and is talking to Little Jimmy Watson when Teddy Long pops up. Truth is going to find him a job. Teddy seems pleased.

Lord Tensai says nothing of note.

US Title: Santino Marella vs. David Otunga

Santino has about 7 British soccer shirts on, finally getting the right one with the British national team one. Quick slam by Otunga gets two and it’s time for clubbing forearms. There’s a three hour Raw next week. Oh and it’s the Draft. Cool. Santino tries his usual drop down but Otunga kicks him in the head. Spinebuster hits but Otunga has to slide all over the place to get in position so that the foot can go on the rope. Santino comes back with his usual stuff and here’s the Cobra, good for the pin at 2:00.

We go to a sitdown interview with Brock. He says he’s not a superstar but a legit destroyer. This is accompanied by highlights of his career on all levels, including him beating Rock. We also get some UFC stills which are still bizarre to see on Raw. Lesnar talks about bringing legitimacy to this company because Cena isn’t the real deal. If Brock had been around for the last eight years, Cena would be carrying his bags. The match at the PPV is an Extreme Rules match.

Zach Ryder vs. Kane

We go to a break during Kane’s entrance and come back to see the Kane attack on the Ortons last week. Ryder gets on the apron and Kane kicks him into the announce table. Kane rams him into the steps and the beating is on. Into the ring and there’s a chokeslam. There was never a bell.

Kane talks about the beating of the Ortons and how it was like father like son.

Kofi is talking to AJ in the back when Bryan pops up to a ROAR. He yells at Kofi for hitting on her and shushes AJ for speaking up. Bryan says he’ll put Kofi in the LeBell Lock but then realizes he’s better than Gene LeBell so it’s now the YES Lock, because that’s what people will be screaming when the referee asks if they give up. Bryan starts a long YES chant in Kofi’s face and keeps doing it until we take a break.

Cena time. Before he talks we see a clip of the Brock beating from last week. Cena finds it interesting that Johnny Ace is always around for these attacks from Brock. Wrestlemania was certainly the end of an era and it might be his own. With Ace becoming the most powerful man in the company, Cena might be in trouble. Ace seems to think that Cena Sucks (said in a great imitation) and that’s a problem.

Ace claims to be legitimizing all of this so he goes and gets Brock Lesnar. After a year of hearing about movie parts and next parts and entertainment, Brock Lesnar stands for destruction. On April 29, it’s not about winning because that’s all Brock has done. The sole purpose of Lesnar at Extreme Rules is to end and replace Cena. Cena doesn’t care because no matter what happens, he’s going to fight.

Here’s Ace who says this is the beginning of the era of People Power. The WWE Universe wants to see Cena fight so tonight Cena will be in an extreme rules match. Next Monday there’s a contract signing between Cena and Brock. The opponent is a mystery because that’s more fun. It doesn’t exactly explain why he told us who Cena’s opponent was in about 10 seconds last week but whatever.

We recap the world title match from earlier and the promo that followed.

Horny is in the back reading a book next to a shelf of CDs and albums when Truth walks through it. Horny tries to go through it but it doesn’t work. Ok then.

Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is ridiculously over. He takes it to the corner and hits a running dropkick. Bryan keeps control to start and we go to the floor. Bryan misses his running knee so Kofi pops up and hits a HUGE dive off the top as we take a break. Back with Bryan avoiding a charge to send Kofi into the buckle. AJ is watching in the back. More kicks from Daniel set up a chinlock.

Kofi comes back with chops and kicks followed by the jumping clothesline. Boom Drop hits and he loads up Trouble in Paradise. As he claps his hands, the fans chant No. That was cute. Yes Lock is countered into the SOS for two. Kofi sets for the top rope cross body but Bryan comes up for a superplex. Kofi shoves him off but the cross body misses. Yes Lock ends this at 10:31. AJ is smiling a little in the back.

Rating: B-. Another good match here as this is what Kofi is really good for: having good TV matches when you need someone to fill in a spot. Nothing is lost here and Kofi will be right back in this spot again. There’s nothing wrong with that because Kofi isn’t going to be a main event guy anytime soon. Good stuff.

Bryan goes for the Lock again but Sheamus makes the save.

Brodus Clay vs. Dolph Ziggler

Well this is some better competition wouldn’t you say? Dolph tries a dropkick but Clay easily suplexes him just after. And here’s Swagger for the DQ at 24 seconds.

Vickie shoves one of the dancing girls down but the other chases her into the ring. Brodus jiggles and Vickie gets shoved down.

Ace and Otunga have a meeting in the back when Eve pops up. She says they were supposed to have a meeting last week but Ace seems puzzled. They go into his office and Otunga follows.

Memorial video for Chief Jay Strongbow. Better late than never.

Little Jimmy has found Teddy a job: GM of Smackdown. He’s perfect because he has experience.

Great Khali/Big Show vs. Primo/Epico

Just scrap the tag titles too if this is th ebest the champions can get. We hear about Rosa and the champs complaining on Twitter lately. Khali and Epico get us going as Abraham Washington (called AW now apparently) is scouting. This goes badly for the champions so it’s off to Primo who gets kicked in the face. The champs try to bail with the titles but Show throws them back in. A pair of chops put them down and double chokeslams end this at 1:54. Oh screw you WWE. Your titles mean nothing and THIS IS WHY.

Package on the show in Moscow.

John Cena vs. ???

It’s Lord Tensai and this is Extreme Rules. Cena grabs a quick suplex but Tensai beats him up. Cena’s shorts look a little shorter here. A corner splash puts Cena on the floor and Tensai puts him into the steps. A powerbomb on the floor is countered and Cena gets the steps. Tensai’s dude drills Cena with kicks and Otunga throws him back in. Butterfly suplex gets two.

Tensai hooks a nerve hold but Cena fights back. Cena hits his usual stuff but when he loads up the Shuffle, Tensai pops up and chops Cena down. Backsplash gets two. Tensai drops a leg on the arm and puts on a Fujiwara Armbar. Sweet goodness there’s some crank on that thing. Cena rolls through into a crossface (called the STF by Cole) and Otunga runs in. There’s an AA for him but Cena walks into green mist and a Baldo Bomb for the pin at 7:00.

Rating: D+. At the end of the day, he’s Albert in red trunks. That doesn’t make him interesting or anything like that. It makes him slow and not someone that I want to watch. I don’t see the logic in having Cena lose AGAIN before a major showdown with Brock, but to be fair he can lose a few matches and not lose any credibility.

Cena is blind to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. I liked this show for the most part and the fact that it was taped didn’t really hurt things that badly. Some of the matches were pretty good and we advanced stuff towards the PPV which is a good thing. They need to flesh out the card a good bit but with three shows left before then that’s certainly possible. I liked this show and it worked pretty well. Good stuff.

Results
CM Punk b. Mark Henry – Chair shot from the top rope
Santino Marella b. David Otunga – Cobra
Daniel Bryan b. Sheamus – Yes Lock
Brodus Clay b. Dolph Ziggler via DQ when Jack Swagger interfered
Great Khali/Big Show b. Epico/Primo – Chokeslam to Primo
Lord Tensai b. John Cena – Chokebomb

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Smackdown – April 10, 2012: Almost As Good As The Brendan Fraser/Alicia Silverstone Version

Smackdown
Date: April 10, 2012
Location: Hampton Coliseum, Hampton, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Booker T

This is another special live show with a theme of Blast From The Past. That means that we have the legends coming out again for their semi-annual appearances which don’t mean much other than us getting to say “hey, I know you.” It still should be fun though as most of these shows are. Also we might even get some fallout from last week with Sheamus. Let’s get to it.

Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine is the Indians’ bullpen. How can it be this bad?

We get a quick clip of Bryan breaking up with AJ last week. Bryan is in Piper’s Pit tonight.

Here’s Mean Gene for an interview in the ring with Sheamus. Ok so by interview it means introducing him and standing in the corner. Sheamus talks about there being a code of honor as champion and he didn’t follow it last week. There was a Daniel Bryan chant as he started talking but it wasn’t a huge one. He publicly apologizes to all referees including Chad Patton. Everyone makes mistakes and he always learns the hard way from them.

Ace’s new trumpet music cuts him off. He shows us the clip of the ending of last week’s main event and the Brogue Kick after the match. Ace wants to know who Sheamus thinks he is and demands a public apology. Sheamus says he just did that and Ace says he didn’t hear it so do it again. He does it again and Ace wants an apology to all of the other referees and we get the same exchange with the same result. Now Ace wants an apology to the world which brings a smirk to Sheamus’ face.

Ace says apologize now which Sheamus does, almost laughing at the same time. That’s not good enough apparently and Sheamus is on permanent probation, meaning that if he touches a referee by accident or on purpose, he’s fired. Also he’s being fined $500,000. Also tonight it’s Del Rio/Bryan vs. Sheamus/Okerlund. As long as we don’t see him in trunks again I’m ok. This was an attempt at making us care about Sheamus and while it’s nothing new at all, it’s certainly better than nothing.

Bob Orton wishes his son good luck in his upcoming match.

Randy Orton vs. Mark Henry

Henry misses a charge and Orton pounds away with right hands. He tries to climb the corner to punch even harder but gets slammed out for two. Bob is watching in the back as we take a break, 80 seconds into the match. Back with Orton fighting out of a neck crank. We see a clip from the break of Orton avoiding a charging Henry to send him into the stairs. Back to the neck crank and then a slam sets up a splash for two. Orton gets his feet up to stop a charging Henry and hits him clotheslines which don’t work.

A low DDT like Miz uses gets two. RKO is countered with Henry throwing Orton to the floor. Orton comes back and rams him into the post twice and slides in when Kane’s pyro goes off. Kane pops up on the screen and says by beating him at Mania, he became a monster again. Last week Orton proved he can be just as evil as Kane is. Kane says it shouldn’t end now, so we pan back to see Bob Orton laid out in front of him. The match just stops at about 11:00.

Rating: C-. This was watchable but not much more. I have no idea why it was a no contest instead of the logical countout win for Henry. Henry has a world title match on Monday so you need to keep him strong, but at the same time you don’t want Orton to look weak. The perfect solution? Countout loss, but for some reason that’s not what we get because WWE has no idea what they’re doing for the most part with basic things like that anymore.

Randy runs to the back and finds his dad but Kane drills him with a pipe and says he’s a sucker for family reunions.

Back and we recap what we saw four minutes ago.

DiBiase and Atlas are watching from the back. Atlas says this is going to be a squash match.

Ryback vs. Benny Camer

Patterson and Hillbilly Jim are watching in the back as well. Ryback KILLS HIM with a clothesline right after the bell and then puts him in a torture rack position and falls backwards for the pin at 35 seconds. WAY better than both Lord Tensai matches so far as Ryback looked like a killer.

Heath Slater is trying to talk Tyson Kidd into teaming with him tonight. Slater even has a Hall of Fame manager for them that says Slater could be the next Honky Tonk Man. It’s Jimmy Hart, who looks exactly the same as he did 20 years ago. Take that for what you will.

Mick Foley comes out to do commentary.

Heath Slater/Tyson Kidd vs. Usos

Cole actually references Countdown to Lockdown (not by name) when talking about Foley’s commentary history. We get the Megaphone which never goes out of style. Jimmy starts with Tyson in this NXT special. They exchange cradles and Slater tags himself in. Off to a chinlock and Jimmy says that he’s had more tag champions than anyone in the history of the WWE. I think Captain Lou might have something to say about that. The Usos make the hot tag and clean house, hitting their toss into the Samoan Drop. Mick gets tired of Jimmy and chases him off with Socko, allowing the Superfly Splash to end this mess at 2:40.

Jimmy takes Socko post match. These legends bits aren’t working at all for the most part.

Time for the Pit with Bryan as the guest. He looks pretty good. Old but good. He’s not as big as a house if nothing else. Piper says he misses being here and says Bryan is the guest tonight, getting a somewhat mixed reaction. We see the breakup clip for the fourth time tonight and here’s Bryan. There’s a brief but solid YES chant but it dies quickly. Piper says Bryan looks happy for someone that lost the title in 18 seconds. Bryan says he’s been granted his rematch and the fans chant 18 seconds. The match is at Extreme Rules and it’s 2/3 falls. AJ will be nowhere to be found.

Piper isn’t sure about that but he does know that AJ is here tonight. He likes AJ and since this is his show, AJ, COME ON DOWN! AJ comes out and is very excited to be in the Pit. She says hi to Daniel and Piper is surprised. AJ defends Bryan and says that deep down, he’s a good person. Piper says in the Pit you don’t have to be politically correct. AJ insists it was her fault and begs forgiveness. She wants to talk to Bryan and Piper tries to talk her out of it. Bryan cuts them off and says if AJ loves him, she’ll leave right now. Piper says she doesn’t need to listen to Bryan but AJ leaves anyway, getting a reaction out of it too.

Bryan goes to leave but Piper goes into Hot Rod mode and talks about Bryan’s YES YES YES shirt. Piper says he has a lot of children including four girls, four ladies. Piper says you don’t tell a lady to shut up. That’s a No. You don’t yell at a lady. That’s a No. You don’t use a lady as a human shield, because that’s a coward, and that’s Bryan, also a No. Piper says he’s looking forward to seeing Sheamus kick Bryan’s head off twice. Bryan slaps Piper and runs away. Piper was on here and it worked well.

Drew McIntyre/Bella Twins vs. Great Khali/Natalya/Beth Phoenix

Men vs. men and women vs. women. The men start but Drew gets chopped and tags out. He says he doesn’t need this and walks out. Alicia hits a northern lights suples on Brie for the pin at 56 seconds. What was the point in this match existing?

Mae Young comes out and kisses Khali. I guess that’s why the match existed.

Damien Sandow explains how sophisticated he is. He doesn’t like social media because it furthers the moral decay of society. Preach it brother.

Another clip of Kane and the Ortons earlier.

Raw ReBound.

Gene thinks Sheamus has a plan for tonight. Sheamus says they’re probably going to lose tonight but he’s not going to let Ace have the satisfaction of seeing Sheamus sweat. If they survive, the first pint is on Sheamus. They’ll either drink to remember or drink to forget.

Jim Duggan vs. Hunico

Duggan knocks him to the floor where Camacho is waiting. Duggan calls out Sarge and I think we have a tag match on our hands. Well it is Smackdown after all. Or maybe Sarge throws Duggan the 2×4 and it’s a DQ at 1:00. Hunico takes the Cobra Clutch post match.

Here’s Cody to complain about life in general. He’s looking forward to a future where he’s the champion again and where these legends don’t hog the spotlight. This brings out Dusty for what could be interesting. Dusty says that he’d do anything for his son, but he doesn’t quite get what Cody has been doing lately. Cody has been poking a grizzly bear lately in Big Show. Dusty gets cut off as Cody says Dusty is embarrassing him and they can talk in the back.

Cody goes to leave but here’s Big Show. He does the required Dusty impression and says he’ll show the real Cody Rhodes. It’s one of the Dashing Tips videos, this one being him putting on lip gloss. Cody looks stunned and Dusty looks…..uh…….I think the right word is disappointed. Show says that was embarrassing and leaves. Dusty doesn’t say anything but does get to dance to his music. I still stand by my theory that Dusty’s kids are the biggest ribs in the history of pro wrestling.

Alberto Del Rio/Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus/Gene Okerlund

The Fink does Gene/Sheamus’ entrance, making it instantly better. Sheamus starts with Del Rio but the heels double team him down quickly. Gene is in a Sheamus t-shirt and pants thankfully. Del Rio puts on a facelock but gets backdropped quickly. Sheamus throws both of them around but the Brogue Kick misses. Bryan dropkicks him to the floor and Del Rio kicks his head off.

Gene gets in for some reason and is surrounded. Ricardo is in there too. The Legends Army comes out to distract Bryan, allowing Sheamus to kick his head off for the pin at 3:23. I’m not going to rate it as most of that was Gene getting trapped and the Legends coming in, but the match was nothing at all of note anyway.

The legends all beat up Ricardo and celebrate to end the show. We’re not done yet though as Cole gets in the ring and says he knows they have to get back to the retirement home so let’s get a quick photo. They surround him and Patterson gives him a weak right hand to knock him to the floor. Atlas has some GUNS on him.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a hard one to grade. First of all, if you’re looking for the Smackdown version of Old School Raw, you didn’t get it here. This was more like a regular episode of Smackdown with some legends thrown in rather than the other way around. Now that being said it still worked okish, with the Pit being a highlight. The Sheamus vs. Ace stuff is decent as it gives Sheamus what he needs more than anything else: something people can relate to.

Since he turned face back in August, all he’s really done is beat people up and tell the occasional funny Irish story. That’s only going to get him so far and I think we reached that back in January. This is something a little different and while it’s something we’ve seen before, I liked how Sheamus handled it. It’s something I want to see continue and that’s a really good sign. This was a good show overall, but it’s not a great one.

Results
Randy Orton vs. Mark Henry went to a no contest
Ryback b. Benny Camer – Torture Rack Drop
Usos b. Tyson Kidd/Heath Slater – Superfly Splash to Slater
Great Khali/Natalya/Alicia Fox b. Bella Twins/Drew McIntyre – Northern lights suplex to Brie
Hunico b. Jim Duggan via DQ when Duggan hit Hunico with the 2×4
Sheamus/Gene Okerlund b. Alberto Del Rio/Daniel Bryan – Brogue Kick to Bryan

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Smackdown – April 6, 2012: Make Sure To Squeeze Sheamus In There Somewhere

Smackdown
Date: April 6, 2012
Location: Orlando Amway Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Josh Matthews

It’s the first show of the new year on Fridays and we have a new boss. Tonight we have Sheamus vs. Del Rio where if Del Rio wins he gets a title match at some later date. It should be interesting to see where Bryan goes after this as he’ll certainly get a rematch somewhere. It’s always interesting to see where things go immediately after Mania, so let’s get to it.

We open with Otunga introducing Johnny Ace to trumpet fanfare. David is wearing what can only be described as a suit jacket over his shoulders that would be big on Viscera. Ace talks about how he’s going to bring charisma and leadership to this show as it’s never been done before. This is a new era of people power. Ace hopes Teddy will be professional during this transition. He asks Teddy to come out and is almost immediately cut off in his smug speech. Teddy says he can tell Ace what he really thinks of him now that he’s out of a job.

He was told it would be crazy to come to Smackdown tonight but he couldn’t just leave the job without thanking the fans. He’s had a great job being the GM and he’d like a holla holla holla before he leaves. Teddy goes to leave but Ace says hang on a second. He offers Teddy a job in the new administration but Teddy turns it down.

Ace reminds him of his grandchildren who need to go to college. Otunga points out that somehow Ace controls the college fund the company set up for Long’s grandchildren, so Teddy reluctantly takes the job of Ace’s lackey. Oh wait first he also have to say that Ace is better than him or it doesn’t happen. Teddy says it but Ace wants to hear it once more, with feeling. No word on what the job is yet but it likely won’t be good for him. Teddy leaves and Ace announces Kane vs. Orton in a No DQ match, but first we have this.

Mark Henry/David Otunga vs. R-Truth

Apparently Booker has to be in Connecticut for a closed door meeting next week with the WWE bosses. Otunga starts and is quickly taken down by a clothesline for two. Lie Detector gets two. Henry comes in who kicks Truth down with a big boot. Abraham Washington is watching in the back. Truth avoids a charge in the corner and hits a side kick, but the World’s Strongest Slam kills him so that Otunga can get the pin at 2:03.

With all three of them still in the ring, here’s Kane. I guess they’re just cutting down the time between matches because he doesn’t do anything to any of them.

Kane vs. Randy Orton

This is a No DQ match. Kane knocks him to the floor very quickly but Orton rams him into the barricade. Kane sees Orton’s barricade and raises him a table to take over. Orton throws him over the table and then into the steps. This is a total brawl so far. Kane punches him up the ramp and they slug it out on the stage. Orton almost knocks Kane off the stage but Kane grabs him by the throat. Randy fights out of that and tries the RKO but Kane DDTs him as we take a break.

Back with them in the ring and Kane taking off the turnbuckle pad. Clothesline gets two for Kane. Orton breaks up the top rope clothesline and dropkicks Kane down. Powerslam looks to set up the RKO but Kane bails to the floor. He pulls Randy to the floor and they slug it out even more. Kane gets dropped on the barricade and a clothesline knocks him over into the time keeper’s area.

Orton tries the elevated DDT on the floor but Kane fights out of it and big boots Orton down. Kane goes under the ring and throws five chairs into the ring. As he comes back in though Orton kicks him in the face and pops him with the chair a few times. The Elevated DDT onto the chair gets two. Kane picks up the chair and goes off on Randy with it but can only get two. Here comes the chokeslam but Orton shoves him into the exposed buckle and the RKO finishes at 10:20 shown of 13:50.

Rating: B-. I liked the match but I think the one at Mania was better. Orton evening the score here is good as he’s been jobbing a lot lately, but I’m not sure I get the idea of having this rematch five days after Mania. This wasn’t the best No DQ match on Smackdown that I’ve ever seen but it did its job well enough.

We get a package of stills from Bryan vs. Sheamus. You know, to make sure no one sees the full version of it.

We get a clip from Raw with Del Rio and Sheamus.

Jobber Barry Stevens gets to talk while the lower card watches in the back for some reason. He thinks the people in Orlando are rude.

Ryback vs. Barry Stevens

Ryback is more famous as Skip Sheffield and is acknowledged as being on the first season of NXT but his name isn’t given. I’m assuming the roster was watching for Ryback. Total squash with a kind of delayed fisherman’s brainbuster getting the pin at 1:08. It looked kind of like a MuscleBuster but more like a suplex than dropping him on the back of his head.

Here are Bryan and AJ to talk about Sunday. Bryan says he’s had a chance to think since Sunday…and he tails off. AJ takes the mic and says that Bryan is a great wrestler and a great person. She’s not the only one that thinks that, drawing a loud YES chant. She talks about the YES signs and chants at Mania and Raw, even when Bryan wasn’t in the ring, which causes a Daniel Bryan chant. Everyone is here to support him.

Bryan doesn’t think that it’s support, but rather mocking. Fans: “NO! NO! NO!” These people are sheep and they don’t make it any better, because AJ cost him the title. He screams at her about how he beat giants in the cage and how he won the Chamber but AJ just had to have her kiss and cost him the title. It was really the kiss of death.

AJ tries to defend herself but Bryan says she won’t make him the bad guy because it’s her fault. It was her clinginess and selfishness that cost Bryan everything. That’ll never happen again because they’re through. He tells her to go sit in her SUV and eat a cheeseburger. Dang those are some serious words. She begs him to talk about this but he dumps her anyway and throws her out of his ring. The fans give her the Goodbye Song.

Big Show vs. Heath Slater

Cody is on commentary. Before the match Show airs the same video from Raw with Cody getting knocked out. Show chops him a lot and throws him around as Cody says he isn’t sure what went wrong on Sunday. Show tackles him and the chokeslam ends this at 1:14.

Cody almost goes in to fight Big Show but changes his mind. Show knocks out Slater with the WMD.

We get the Punk/Jericho segment from Raw with the alcohol.

The Bellas are in the back with Ace when Sheamus comes in. This is his first appearance as champion: a backstage segment. The referee has been told to bring Alberto and Sheamus face to face tonight so Sheamus can’t kick him in the face. Sheamus says ok and only those that deserve it will get a surprise kick. He talks about his cousin who was a bully and how he was in charge until the people rebelled against him. Subtle.

Beth Phoenix vs. Nikki Bella

Kelly comes out for no apparent reason. Total dominance until Kelly comes to the apron for no apparent reason. She distracts Beth who then charges shoulder first into the post, letting Nikki hit an X Factor for the pin at 59 seconds. This enhanced the show so much for me.

Video on Chief Jay Strongbow who passed away earlier this week.

We get a video on newcomer Damien Sandow, who talks about how real entertainment is a lost art. Instead of listening to Mozart or reading Shakespeare, we now watch Jersey Shore and Real Housewives. He doesn’t blame the people for it, but he will save you from it. Sandow is Idol Stevens from OVW and went by Sandow in FCW.

We get some videos of Cena before Mania, talking about how he has to win. This is followed up by Lesnar’s return and the F5. Once again Cole screws up the return as he sounds like he’s calling a Superstars comeback.

The Three Stooges cast will be guest starring on Raw. I really hope that doesn’t hurt the hot streak WWE has been on.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Sheamus

If Alberto wins, he gets a future title shot. We have about 15 minutes of airtime left and this is the first live appearance of Sheamus. That goes a long way in telling you where he stands in the company’s eyes. There’s a break between the entrances and Tuesday will be a live Blast From The Past Smackdown. That should be fun. Josh talks about a WWE Magazine article about what Del Rio’s trunks signify. Booker: “They mean he has money. Don’t overcomplicate things.”

Del Rio tries to go after the arm but Sheamus comes back with the Finlay fireman’s carry roll which I can’t think of the name of. Josh says this is for the title and that isn’t disputed by either other commentator, but I’m pretty sure it’s not on the line here. Alberto works on the arm but the Armbreaker is broken up and Sheamus tries a Brogue Kick which is ducked. Del Rio heads to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Sheamus getting two off the slingshot shoulder. Sheamus hits the ten forearms to the chest but Del Rio escapes and a running enziguri puts Sheamus on the floor. He rams Sheamus’ shoulder into the steps and hooks an arm hold back inside. Sheamus tries a neckbreaker but Del Rio escapes and goes back to the arm.

Alberto charges into the Irish Curse and both guys are down. Sheamus destroys him with power moves and calls for the Brogue Kick but Ricardo pops up for a distraction. Del Rio brings in a chair but Sheamus takes it away. The referee sees him holding it and calls for a DQ at 7:39 shown of 11:09. Sheamus didn’t use the chair.

Rating: C. I wasn’t into this match at all and it really wasn’t a good way to start off Sheamus’ reign. At the end of the day, Del Rio is boring. There’s NOTHING to his character besides he’s rich, he’s Mexican, and he uses a cross armbreaker. That’s it. He was showing some signs of being very evil and sinister when he injured Christian and stood over him with that evil smile, but now that’s all gone. There’s nothing to him but he stays in the title picture non-stop. I don’t get it.

Sheamus kicks the referee to end the show. Nice guy.

Overall Rating: C-. I really wasn’t into this show. They did a really bad job of showcasing the new champion, as he popped up halfway through the show for a pointless backstage segment, had a weak match which he lost, and was treated like a second act. This show was about Laurinitis who is most well known for being boring. That’s not exactly something that makes me want to watch Smackdown, but hopefully things get better next week.

Results
David Otunga/Mark Henry b. R-Truth – Otunga pinned R-Truth after a World’s Strongest Slam
Randy Orton b. Kane – RKO
Ryback b. Barry Stevens – Delayed Fisherman’s Brainbuster
Big Show b. Heath Slater – Chokeslam
Nikki Bella b. Beth Phoenix – Facejam
Alberto Del Rio b. Sheamus via DQ when Sheamus was seen holding a chair

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Wrestlemania XXVIII – One Of The Best Shows Of All Time

Wrestlemania XXVIII
Date: April 1, 2012
Location: Sun Life Stadium, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 78,363
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
America the Beautiful: Lillian Garcia

As I wrote out that title, I almost started shaking. Today is Wrestlemania Sunday. In less than two and a half hours, the show is going to begin. This is the day that we as fans wait for all year long. Everything ends tonight and at the same time, everything begins. You all know the card by now, but for those who might forget, the main event is John Cena vs. The Rock, Once In A Lifetime (until ratings go down and we need a rematch). Let’s get to it.

First up we’ve got a pre-show match as a bonus.

Tag Titles: Justin Gabriel/Tyson Kidd vs. Primo/Epico vs. Usos

Primo/Epico have the titles and have beaten the Usos about five times already. Kidd and Gabriel are teaming for the first time after Kidd asked Gabriel if he wanted to be a team. Gabriel said yes, and apparently that qualifies you as deserving a title match. New tights for the Usos here. Josh and Striker are doing commentary for this match. This is under WCW rules as in three in the ring at once, but in a twist you can only tag your own partner.

Jey, Tyson and Primo start things off. Primo is sent to the floor and Tyson gets two off a sunset flip. Primo comes back in with a missile dropkick as Jey gets beaten down. Kidd makes the save but gets DDTed for two. Primo loads up a superplex on Jey but Tyson springboards up to make it a Tower of Doom in a cool twist on the traditional spot there. Tags bring in Epico and Jimmy but I think Kidd is still legal for his team.

Jimmy comes out of the corner with a spinning cross body and a Bubba Bomb for two. Tag to Gabriel who jumps over Jimmy but walks into a Samoan attack. Back to Jey who hits an assisted Samoan Drop. Jimmy tags in quickly for a double Rikishi attack to Epico and Gabriel. Epico gets dropped onto Primo so Jey can hit a HUGE dive onto both of them.

Kidd pops up on the apron but Jimmy launches him to Jey for a Samoan Drop. Gabriel sets for a top rope Asai Moonsault and hits it on his second attempt. Better safe than sorry on that spot. He tries the springboard 450 but (mostly) hits knees. Backstabber by Epico pins Jey at 5:05.

Rating: B-. Really fun opener here with the six smaller guys being thrown out there to fire up the crowd. That’s what cruiserweights and hot Latin women that can shake their hips were made for so you can’t ask for much more than that. I’m a big Uso fan so seeing them on Wrestlemania was a cool thing to see. Very good start to the night.

Lillian opens us with America the Beautiful. She even sings the second verse.

The opening video is about how this is the beginning, which includes a set of clips of the beginning of a lot of guys’ careers, including some shots of Cena in OVW. We also get some shots of the main guys’ careers. It’s the four in the main events only, which makes sense.

Smackdown World Title: Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan

Makes sense. Might as well make this the most worthless world title match in company history given the build for it so far. Cole and Lawler are calling this alone. Bryan has his robe here and AJ is looking GREAT. We get the kiss to start and Brogue Kick and it’s over in 8 seconds. I kid you not it was that fast.

We have 7 matches left and almost four hours to go. Each match could conceivably get 20 minutes each.

Miz fires up Team Johnny in the back. They don’t seem to care until Otunga comes in to introduce Johnny in a white suit. He says this is going to be a night in the ranks of Hogan slamming Andre and Austin refusing to submit to Bret.

Win a trip to Wrestlemania 29.

Kane vs. Randy Orton

This is over Kane shaking Randy’s hand last year and hating himself for it. I can’t imagine this feud isn’t going to continue after this. Seeing Kane in daylight in the welder’s mask makes him look pretty ridiculous. Kane takes him into the corner to start as I think the fans are chanting for Orton. Well it’s longer than the previous match at least. Orton escapes a chokeslam and stomps on the foot/ankle.

Elevated DDT (called a bulldog by that idiot Cole) is countered and Kane drapes him over the top rope for a big boot. This is Kane’s 14th Mania which has to be up there on the all time list. Kane takes him down and it’s off to a chinlock. Orton fights up with punches but runs into the uppercut for two. Side slam gets two. Kane again stops Orton’s comeback and hits a vertical suplex for two.

A headbutt slows Kane down and Orton spins out of another side slam via a backflip. Orton’s backbreaker puts Kane down but his clotheslines don’t do much. There’s the powerslam and Kane’s shoulder goes into the post. Kane comes back and goes up but his clothesline is countered by a dropkick in a cool spot. Orton loads up the Punt but runs into the chokeslam for two. Kane is frustrated so he does an Undertaker situp.

He pounds Orton down in the corner but Randy comes back with a right of his own. RKO is countered but Orton kicks the knee out again. Randy charges into an elbow and Kane goes up but there’s Orton again. Orton pounds him down on the ropes and goes up with him. He loads up something but Kane grabs him by the throat and gets the pin with a super chokeslam at 10:55.

Rating: B-. This was my upset pick and I wasn’t disappointed. That ending was pretty cool too as it looked great. Orton usually brings it at Wrestlemania and this was no exception as he got a decent match out of Kane. I’m likely overrating it but this is a match I’ve wanted to see for years.

Santino is with a captain from the show Deadliest Catch. They’re having I think king crabs and Mick Foley is with them. He puts on a yellow hat and talks like a pirate but the captain tells him no one talks like that. There are Socko and The Cobra and they attack the crabs. Ron Simmons comes in and you know the rest.

The National Guard is awesome.

Intercontinental Title: Big Show vs. Cody Rhodes

The idea here is that Big Show can’t win at Wrestlemania and Cody has made fun of him for it. Cody immediately bails to the floor and Show goes after him. Cody has red trunks tonight. He dives onto Show on the floor and is tossed back in via a SCARY show of strength. Show destroys Cody with chops and gives him a Stink Face. Cody goes after the knee to get Big Show down which is smart.

Show is down on the mat now as Cody shouts about how this is his moment. He hooks a standing leg lock and Show is in some trouble. He starts to get up but Cody drapes the arm across the top rope to slow him down. Disaster Kick (I guess it’s no longer Beautiful) staggers Show but a second attempt results in a spear. WMD gives Show the title at 5:23.

Rating: D+. I wasn’t wild on this but it’s a good way to get the title off Rhodes. That being said, I don’t buy the whole “Show gets his moment” deal at all. He was in the main event before, so how exactly is winning the IC Title in about 5 minutes a bigger deal? Doesn’t work for me at all, but this should be enough for Cody to move up the ladder.

Show cries post match and kisses I’m assuming his wife.

Video on what it means to be a Diva. This would be better used with the sound off.

Maria Menounos/Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres

This is a REALLY risky move as the other four matches are Punk vs. Jericho, the Cell, the main event and the Battle of the GM’s. That’s a stacked final four matches and I’d be worried about them overcrowding the second half of the show. We get the video of the evil ones invading Extra. Maria arguing back at them is still horribly bad. She has a legit case of bad ribs due to Dancing With The Stars, plus stress fractures in her feet.

The sun has gone down now and the stadium looks awesome. Eve and Kelly start things off. Kelly charges into a boot in the corner but the moonsault results in her getting crotched. Here’s Maria and it’s a double Stink Face. Beth kicks her in the bad ribs and Eve goes with a bodyscissors. Maria fires off some decent elbows as the fans chant for her to tap. Beth comes in with a modified bearhug but Maria fights out and tags Kelly.

The annoying screaming blonde does her usual stuff but adds a Molly Go Round for two as Eve saves. Glam Slam is countered into a bulldog and there’s the tag to Maria. She….goes up and this isn’t going to end well. Beth drills her and sets for a gorilla press, but Kelly gets her down and shoves Beth into Eve so Maria can get the rollup pin at 6:54.

Rating: C+. You know, given the amount of injuries to Maria, this was really impressive. That girl legit tries out there every time and you can’t ask for more than anything than that. Decent match and the Kelly flip dive wasn’t bad. When Kelly is the worst worker in a match that involves a celebrity, you know there’s a problem.

Shawn says this match is the end of an era. If HHH loses, it’s the end of the Game. Shawn thinks it’s ironic that he can end an era.

New attendance record: 78,363.

JR is here to call the rest of the show. Is that a beard on him?

The Undertaker vs. HHH

Well this is quite the first hour main event. It’s 8:03 and we’ve got four matches left, which means this and Rock vs. Cena are going to need to be about 35 minutes each. They can do it but that would be a lot. This is billed as The End of an Era, but I don’t know what HHH is exactly putting up. If he loses, it’s the same thing as last year. This is inside Hell in a Cell and Shawn Michaels is guest referee.

No buildup package so I’ll help you out here. Taker beat HHH last year but had to be carried out, so he asked for a rematch. HHH didn’t want to do it so Taker played the “Shawn is better than you” card to get him to say yes. The rest of it was a lot of ego stroking and here we are. HHH’s big entrance this year is him coming out of something that looks like Vader’s old helmet with spikes on it.

Shawn’s shirt isn’t tucked in. It’s Wrestlemania and he’s that sloppy? I think we need a new icon. Taker’s robe looks like it has muscles painted onto it. Or does it look Japanese? These entrances still give me chills, even if he’s bald under there. We get lightning, thunder and smoke as always. His head isn’t completely bald but it’s close enough. It’s almost a mowhawk with hair on the side of it if that makes sense. That look kind of works on him actually.

The Cell is lowered to Memory Remains by Metallica. Slugout to start and JR calls Taker’s punches carcinogenic. HHH comes back so Taker throws him into the corner. The haircut is attributed to HHH not giving him a rematch immediately. Ok then. Out to the floor and Taker goes into the Cell. Now HHH goes into it and is backdropped. This appears to be the taller model with the very little space between the cage and the ring.

Taker pounds on him and chokes on the floor. Shawn tries to break up the choking but Taker knocks him away. Into the cage again as Taker has controlled so far. HHH goes into the steps and we go back inside. The Facebuster is no sold and Taker clotheslines him down. Old School connects and HHH is down. Back to the floor and Taker rams the steps into the Game’s face.

The steps are placed in the ring and Taker this the legdrop (loathsome according to JR) on the apron. Back in HHH grabs a DDT from out of nowhere to put both guys down. HHH rams Taker’s head into the steps three times and tries a Pedigree on the steps which is countered into a backdrop. Taker charges into a spinebuster onto the steps but he manages to grab the Hell’s Gate which won the match last year. In a REALLY impressive counter, HHH picks him up into a powerbomb for two.

We’re ten minutes into this and it feels like we’re only in the beginning. Here are two chairs from HHH and one goes into Taker’s ribs and back. The steps are set up in the corner and Taker gets whipped into them. HHH throws them out of the ring and there’s another chair to the back of Undertaker. The Game goes Stone Cold with the chair and Shawn tries to stop him but can’t.

Shawn finally throws the chair out and HHH says if Shawn wants it to end, then end it. HHH grabs the other chair and shoves Shawn down to beat on Taker some more. That must be about 20 shots with it so far. Taker specifically says not to stop it when Shawn asks. Taker gets up and a shot to the ribs and back puts him right back down, getting two. HHH heads to the floor and there’s the sledgehammer.

HHH says he doesn’t care as he’s basically turning heel mid match. He keeps telling Shawn to end it but Taker keeps saying no when Shawn asks to end it. Sledgehammer to the face gets two. There appears to be some blood over HHH’s eye and oh yes there is. It’s not bad but it’s certainly there. HHH sets for a BIG shot to Taker’s prone head but Shawn stops it and throws the hammer to the floor.

HHH keeps shouting at Shawn to end it because Taker is done. Shawn pulls his finger up to end it but can’t do it. He looks at Taker and thinks about doing it again but still can’t do it. Now he looks at Taker again…and Taker puts Shawn in the Hell’s Gate! HHH hits Taker in the head with the hammer but Shawn is down now. HHH sets for a big hammer shot but Taker kicks him low and puts the Hell’s Gate on again.

There’s no Shawn and HHH drops the hammer. HHH tries the powerbomb counter but can’t do it. He grabs the hammer again but passes out. No wait he’s back up. Taker’s face is a meme in waiting. Shawn is still down and Taker has to let the hold go due to exhaustion. Both guys are out. Here’s Charles Robinson who unlocks the cage to a ton of booing. Chokeslam to HHH gets two. Robinson gets a chokeslam for the count. Eh you knew it was going to be Shawn to count the fall so that’s no shock.

The fans think this is awesome and they would be correct. Shawn kicks Taker into the Pedigree but it gets a VERY close two. I really thought that was it. That didn’t happen at all last year which makes this even better than last year. Shawn is distraught that he almost counted the fall after interfering. HHH has the hammer again and he throws Shawn to the floor. The Game goes after Taker with the hammer but Taker sits up, making HHH fall down in fear.

Here’s the Big Dead Comeback with all of his old favorites. Snake Eyes into the big boot is followed by a legdrop. Tombstone plants HHH but only gets two. Not even a close two either. Shawn looks like he’s about to cry in the corner. They slug it out from their knees to their feet and HHH Pedigrees him out of nowhere for two. It wasn’t a great one so it’s a bit more believable. Taker sits up again and grabs a chair. HHH has the hammer but Taker steps on it. Now HHH takes the beating with the chair and the chair is bent. All of the shots only get two though.

Shawn yells at both of them to let it end already. HHH tries to grab Shawn to pull himself up and gets the hammer. Taker can’t follow up and HHH is in agony. He tries a hammer shot but Taker blocks it due to HHH’s exhaustion. Now Taker has the hammer and HHH shoves him away. There’s a crotch chop so Taker hits him in the face with the hammer. Shawn turns his back on the match and the hammer is thrown to the floor. There go the straps and the throat slit sets up the tombstone for the pin at 30:53.

Rating: A+. I liked this a lot better than last year’s. Of the four matches these three have combined for, I’d put this at second best after HBK vs. Taker I, which is pretty high praise. Great match with some great drama and there were actual moments here where I thought the Streak was over, namely the DX Special finisher. Shawn added something here, but I don’t think it was as epic as they were shooting for. The Cell wasn’t a huge factor but it did add something to it as far as a visual goes. Great match and I loved it.

Shawn pulls Taker to his feet post match. Both of them help HHH to the back in a cool visual.

Hall of Fame video. It’s cool to see Flair up there.

Here are the Hall of Fame inductees. The Fink does the intros which is good. That man belongs at Wrestlemania. Tyson does a crotch chop of course. Edge is on the stage and gets his theme music played. No one says anything but it’s cool to see Flair there. Note that I said there and not in the ring.

Win a trip to Wrestlemania 29!

Josh is about to talk to Flo Rida when Heath freaking Slater says interview him instead. Flo Rida comes out and Slater asks about a duet. That gets a no so Slater wants to be a DJ or backup dancer. Those both get a no. Flo Rida says Slater can hold his mic. Slater gets in his face and Flo Rida shoves him into a wall. Hawkins and Reks come in to laugh at Slater. Ok then.

Team Johnny vs. Team Teddy

Johnny: The Miz, Mark Henry, Drew McIntyre, Jack Swagger, Dolph Ziggler, David Otunga (captain)
Teddy: Kofi Kingston, R-Truth, Booker T, Great Khali, Zack Ryder, Santino Marella (captain)

Otunga has his coffee cup with him too which is awesome. Vickie and Horny are flagbearers. The winning GM controls both shows. Eve is with Ryder. Aksana looks good in the Teddy shirt. Dolph and Kofi start things off and Dolph takes over. Kofi comes back with a top rope cross body for two and here’s Truth. Spinning legdrop gets two but Ziggler dropkicks him down.

Off to Drew who gets caught by the Lie Detector. Khali comes in and chops a bit before Booker gets the tag. Side slam gets two. JR is gone now. Otunga gets in a shot to Booker and Drew’s big boot allows him to tag Swagger. Why is swagger in aquamarine? He’s an ALL AMERICAN AMERICAN. Swagger takes him down and it’s time for Henry. He does absolutely nothing so it’s time for Miz.

Running knee lift gets two and it’s off to a chinlock. Back to Ziggy for a knee drop and then back to Miz. Booker finally gets some breathing room but Henry comes in for the World’s Strongest Slam. Khali chops Henry down and everything breaks down. Kofi/Truth hit double dropkicks to send the heels to the floor. For some reason they throw Horny onto Henry and then along with Ryder hit stereo dives to the floor. Aksana spears Vickie as the match is a mess.

Booker and Miz are down in the ring at the moment but there’s the tag to Santino. Santino does his usual stuff and the saluting headbutt from the top. Cobra is loaded up but he stops to go after Johnny. Cobra to Miz gets two as Dolph makes a VERY close save. Tag to Ryder who monkey flips Dolph and a neckbreaker takes down Miz. He loads up the Rough Ryder but Miz throws him onto Ziggler. He loads up the Broski Boot but Eve comes in for no apparent reason. The distraction lets Miz hit the Finale on Ryder for the pin at 10:42.

Rating: C. Was Otunga ever in the match? This was pretty much exactly what was expected with Eve screwing over the team “by mistake” and Johnny’s team winning. I don’t think anyone ever thought Team Teddy had a chance and even further ends the Brand Split, which is more or less dead already. No issues here for the most part.

Eve kicks Ryder in the balls post match and walks off with her hand on her hip.

Extreme Rules is in four weeks.

Alex Rodriguez and Torrie Wilson are here.

Video on what WWE has done for Miami.

Ace brags to Punk a bit about the win. If Punk gets disqualified, he loses the title. That sounds like the perfect setup for a rematch where Punk can’t get disqualified at Extreme Rules.

Raw World Title: Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk

If Punk, the champion, gets DQ’ed, he loses the title. We get a quick video recapping Punk’s rise up the roster and Jericho saying that Punk has addiction in his blood. They go to the mat quickly and Punk stomps away on him in the corner. Jericho slaps him as he’s trying to get disqualified. Punk stomps to four and then stops each time which is a nice touch. Jericho slaps him two more times and then hides. Punk dropkicks him in the corner and pounds on him to four again.

Jericho shouts about Punk’s father, earning him more elbows to the head. Punk loads up the Macho Elbow but Jericho rolls to the floor. Punk is cool with that and hits a top rope clothesline for two. Jericho asks about Punk’s sister which draws a chair from Punk but he won’t swing. A line about Punk’s sister being a drug addict doesn’t do it so Punk kicks him in the ribs instead. Punk throws the chair away and walks into a bottom rope dropkick (yes a bottom rope dropkick) to take the champion down.

Back elbow puts Punk on the outside. They go to the apron and Punk tries a GTS but the Canadian escapes and clotheslines Punk back in. Jericho suplexes him to the floor and it almost looked like a Jackhammer. Back inside that gets two. Butterfly backbreaker gets the same. Jericho is working on the back to set up the Walls. Off to a chinlock and then a kick to the back. Surfboard submission goes on so Punk jumps up into a dropkick to the gut in a nice counter.

Punk counters the bulldog by sending Jericho into the corner crotch first. CM makes his comeback with kicks and chops, plus a neckbreaker for two. Punk hits the knee in the corner but the bulldog is countered. Lionsault gets knees but Jericho counters into the Walls but that gets countered. Sweet sequence. High kick gets two and Chris is down. The Macho Elbow looks awkward as it looked like it hit but I think Jericho put his knees up, which doesn’t do much good for an elbow. That looked weird.

Codebreaker hits but Punk rolls out. Jericho throws him back in but walks into the GTS. Punk can’t cover immediately though and Jericho gets his foot on the rope. Another high kick misses but a powerslam gets two. We get a series of standing switches resulting in Jericho draping him over the top and hitting the Lionsault for two. Chris goes up and Punk tries a rana, but Jericho counters into the Walls in a sweet counter that I’ve seen him use before. Punk of course gets the rope but getting there was cool.

Jericho charges at him but Punk backdrops him to the floor. Punk is holding his back and Jericho stands in perfect position for the suicide dive from Punk. The fans are a little dead for some reason. I don’t get why as this has been a good match. In a SICK spot, Punk hits the running knee to the head of Jericho while it’s against the post.

Punk tries the springboard clothesline but jumps into the Codebreaker for two. That would have been back to back losses at Mania due to the springboard for Punk. Two GTS’s are countered and Jericho is getting frustrated. He goes up but Punk kicks him in the back. GTS is countered AGAIN, this time into the Liontamer and then the Walls. Punk crawls for the rope but Jericho drags him back into the middle.

The champ crawls through the legs into a small package and they reverse it a few times but Punk counters into the Vice which Jericho counters into a rollup for two but he can’t break the hold. Now Jericho knees him in the back of the head and FINALLY breaks the hold, countering into a Walls attempt. Punk counters THAT into the Vice and this time he leans his head forward so Jericho can’t knee him. Jericho is forced to tap at 22:23.

Rating: A. ANOTHER awesome match here. That finishing sequence was absolutely awesome with some SICK counters. I’m not sure if I’d call it a masterpiece or anything, but these two nailed it and it looked like Punk outsmarted Jericho using psychology he gained throughout the match, which is great stuff. Loved this and it’s another great match on a GREAT show so far.

Mania 29 will be in New Jersey.

FUNKASAURUS!!! AND HE’S TALKING!!! I don’t think most people care about him. He asks people to pull out their phones because they’re going to call their mamas. Brodus calls his mama and says he wishes she was there. His mama is here with the bridge club apparently. She was in the back….and he didn’t know it? She’s a woman with really weird hair and what has to be……oh my goodness the bridge club is all here to dance with her. There must be 20 old women out there dancing. I think I need a minute.

Go see G.I. Joe 2.

Clips of the Once in a Lifetime special to hype up the main event. If you don’t get the story here, go look it up.

Diddy introduces some rapper to sing one of the theme songs. The rapper defines an underdog who apparently is Cena in this. Uh….not quite but ok.

John Cena vs. The Rock

Writing that gave me a chill. Cena is booed but it’s not horrible. We get his traditional shot from the back as he runs to the ring. There’s a new green shirt too. Ok now he’s getting booed. There’s nothing really special to Cena’s entrance this year. Once Cena is in the ring Flo Rida does the other theme song to the show with a full set of backup dancers. Now some chick comes out to sing another song with him. Could the timing on this be worse?

Rock’s entrance really could have done without the dance troupe behind him and it made things look a bit less epic than they were going for. He looked like he was going in for a big fight though and that’s the important thing. We get a shot from above the stadium and it looks AWESOME. We get big match intros. This is really happening. Oh THERE are the boos for Cena. There are some cheers and it’s nowhere near MITB but it’s up there. Big pop for Rock as expected.

The bell rings at 10:24:42 after about a minute of staring. My heart is beating out of my chest as I can’t believe it’s finally here. They lock up and Cena shoves him off. He looks like he lost five pounds of air with the exhale after that. The dueling chants begin and it’s certainly not a one sided crowd. Rock shoves Cena off. That’s so Hogan (in a good way). They lock up again and Rock grabs a headlock.

They fight over a wristlock and Rock does Owen’s counter into a pair of armdrags and La Majistral for two. He did that at Survivor Series and Cena still looks stunned. Cena whips him in and gets perhaps the highest leapfrog I’ve ever seen into a headlock takeover. No one has an advantage of note after about four minutes. Rock lowers his head for Cena to kick him and Rock pops him with a right.

Cena charges and Rock tries a Sharpshooter, but John rolls to the floor. Rock catches Cena coming in but Cena sends him into the corner and hits some shoulders. Clothesline gets one and Rock gets to the rope. You know it occurs to me: Cena has an experience advantage here and a big one at that. He’s been in WWE going on ten years, whereas Rock was around less than seven in total, and that’s stretching A LOT.

Rock fires off some punches but misses a charge to send him to the floor. They’re starting slow but we have almost half an hour for the slow build. Rock gets dropped on the barricade and they go to the floor. Cena drops the ribs into the announce table and sits in the ring. Back in the ring and Cena is in control. Belly to belly gets two as he keeps working on the ribs. Now a bearhug which is a smart move. Cena’s power is often forgotten until the end of the match so this makes sense.

Rock fights out of it with punches and a DDT, but Cena fights back. Now Rock comes back with punches and the jumping clothesline. Spinebuster looks to set up the elbow but Cena picks the leg for an STF attempt. That gets countered so Cena comes back with the shoulders and ProtoBomb. The Shuffle hits but the AA is countered and they clothesline (kind of) each other.

They slug it out and Rock takes over with faster punches. He tries to do You Can’t See Me but Cena grabs the AA for two. NOW this is getting good, almost fifteen minutes into it. That’s not a bad thing mind you as it’s about what happens in every main event match. Cena might have a cut next to his nose but it’s not bad. Cena goes after Rock and gets caught in the Rock Bottom for two. Rock hammers him in the corner but walks into a side slam for two.

Cena goes up and takes forever, but manages to hit the top rope Fameasser for two. Out of nowhere Rock grabs the Sharpshooter and somehow it’s gotten even worse. We’re over twenty minutes into this and Rock is getting frustrated. Sharpshooter goes on again and he’s just pulling on the feet instead of wrapping his arm around them. They go to the floor as we’re over 20 minutes into this.

Cena goes into the steps and Rock is in full control so far. John goes into the steps again but as they come back in he sunset flips Rock (that boy can JUMP) but instead of covering he hooks the STF. The leg is bent in a freaky way. Rock almost gets the rope so Cena lets go and pulls back to the middle of the ring. Rock is starting to fade and he’s not very close to the rope. The referee takes forever to check the arm and it drops once. It drops twice, but on the third try Rock continues to channel Hogan (again awesome) to raise the arm. He FINALLY makes the rope and we’re not done yet.

We’re 24 minutes into this so it’s got to be running short on time. It’s 10:49 now so it can’t break forty minutes. Cena is tired but he walks into a Samoan Drop to put both guys down. They slug it out and both finishers are countered. Spinebuster puts Cena down and there goes the elbow pad. The People’s Elbow hits for two. Cena grabs a small package (easy big fella) for two. John grabs a slingshot to send Rock into the buckle and a rollup gets two.

Cena drives him to the corner and puts Rock up on the second rope. He looks like he’s setting for a superplex but Rock shoves him off. Rock looks very tired and I can’t blame him. It’s his first singles match in about 9 years and he’s going half an hour. Rock goes up top (huh?) and tries a cross body but Cena rolls throug and flips him onto his shoulders for the AA for TWO. I thought that might have been it. It’s 10:54 and they’ve gone thirty minutes now. John looks at his hand, takes off the wristband, and sets for the People’s Elbow but walks into the Rock Bottom for the pin at 30:40. WOW.

Rating: B+. I have no idea what the point of that is, but they did it. The match was never going to be able to live up to the hype and I don’t think it was going to ever be able to do so. I really don’t agree with the ending as there’s no incentive for a rematch now, Cena looks like he can’t beat a guy that’s been retired almost longer than he was active, and it does nothing for the guys sticking around. I don’t get it at all. Good match, close to great, not a masterpiece.

Rock poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: A+. This was an incredible show and one of the best Wrestlemanias I’ve ever seen. I was really worried about the pacing of the show for awhile but they pulled it off really well and it never dragged. There were multiple classics and that’s exactly what Wrestlemania is supposed to be. When the worst match is probably the Divas, that’s definitely a good sign.

As for the main event, it was indeed very good but I didn’t like the ending. Granted that’s two minutes after it so maybe that’ll change. I don’t hate it, but I don’t like it that well at the moment. Still though, it’s a very good match to end an amazing show and we’ll have to see where things go from here. Absolutely worth seeing though.

Results
Sheamus b. Daniel Bryan – Brogue Kick
Kane b. Randy Orton – Middle Rope Chokeslam
Big Show b. Cody Rhodes – WMD
Maria Menounous/Kelly Kelly b. Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres – Rollup to Beth
Undertaker b. HHH – Tombstone
Team Johnny b. Team Teddy – Skull Crushing Finale to Ryder
CM Punk b. Chris Jericho – Anaconda Vice
The Rock b. John Cena – Rock Bottom

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Sheamus Just Won The World Title In Ten Seconds

I kid you not, it was Bryan kissing AJ, bell, Brogue Kick, new champion.




Wrestlemania #28: Smackdown World Title – Daniel Bryan (C) vs. Sheamus

From a great build to almost no build.This is the match that I think the company believes has a built in story due to Sheamus winning the Rumble.  However, since then he and Bryan have only had a limited amount of contact.  Sheamus has been running over the majority of the upper midcard while Bryan has barely done anything but talk.  The problem here is that there isn’t much of a reason for these two to fight other than Sheamus qualified to get this match.  The story would seem to suggest Sheamus kicks Bryan’s head off to win the title, but I’m not 100% sure on it.  The problem is that if Sheamus loses, there’s nothing else for him to do while Bryan has a few other options.  I’ll take the pale one to win the title though.

 

Thoughts/Predictions?




Smackdown – March 23, 2012: More Coasting Than A Downhill Bike Race

Smackdown
Date: March 23, 2012
Location: Prudential Center, Newark, New Jersey
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Josh Matthews

We’re closing in on Wrestlemania even more now and the main event tonight is, you guessed it, another tag match. For some reason Miz is in this match instead of Jericho, teaming with Bryan to face Punk/Sheamus. I don’t get that: why not have all four of them in the same match? Either way, having Sheamus and Bryan in the same ring is a good thing as they need all the help they can get at this point. Let’s get to it.

Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine is the Indiana Hoosiers. They need to be eliminated.

Here are AJ and Bryan to open the show. Good heat on the champ here. Bryan celebrates before saying anything else. AJ is asked what’s so great about being Bryan’s girlfriend. He has soft lips, he caresses her and sometimes they spoon. She calls him Danny and gets corrected before going into a list of his better traits. Being a vegan is a good thing. She isn’t as thrilled about this batch of them. Most importantly AJ feels safe. Bryan whispers something to her to say and she says it’s a little personal. He says say it, so AJ says he’s a great lover. Oh and he’ll keep the title at Wrestlemania.

Bryan starts a cheer for himself but here’s Sheamus. They’ve at least been having these two interact a bit which has been a plus. Sheamus says he threw up in his mouth a bit back there listening to this. He makes fun of the soft lips stuff and says he doesn’t want to go there, but he does want to go to Wrestlemania. Sheamus calls him Danny which is corrected and also starts a chant. He calls Bryan Danny Boy which doesn’t sit well with the champ either. “If you don’t like that, you’ll hate being called the former World Heavyweight Champion.” Sheamus says he’ll kick Bryan’s teeth down his throat. I liked this a lot.

R-Truth vs. Mark Henry

Truth hammers away which works about as well as any other attacks by average sized men on monsters. Truth gets knocked down by a headbutt and is sent to the floor. Henry crushes Truth’s head against the steps and they go back inside. Henry misses an elbow drop and Truth hits a seated dropkick and a low DDT for one. Truth goes up and jumps into the World’s Strongest Slam for the pin at 2:59. Total squash. Team Johnny wins again. I know they’re winning at the PPV but at least make it look possible. Please?

Big Show vs. Kane again tonight.

We get what might be a first: the debut of a Hall of Fame announcement on Smackdown. It’s Yokozuna. No issues with that. Mil Mascaras is mentioned as going in with this class, which I believe is the first time that’s been mentioned on WWE TV.

We get a clip from Raw of Ryder’s rally and cut to Team Teddy in Long’s office. Teddy says he needs more convincing so Horny comes in with a Team Teddy flag. He’s the official mascot of the team now. Khali comes in wearing Ryder gear and says Woo Woo Woo You Know It. Ryder and Khali are on the team now. Well it’s better than no appearance at all. His stuff with Kane and Cena is never going to be mentioned again is it?

AJ vs. Brie Bella

AJ is the home state girl being from Jersey. An inset interview from the Bellas has them talking about how Brie doesn’t want Nikki’s advice because Nikki lost last week. Booker apologizes for one of his statements about AJ recently. Which statement that is he doesn’t list but whatever. Brie controls to start and stomps away at AJ. Bryan’s advice: do better. Off to a chinlock which is pretty quickly broken. AJ hooks a Fujiwara Armbar and a decent one. Nikki gets up on the apron to distract AJ but Brie rams into Nikki and is rolled up for the pin at 2:48.

Post match we find out that Brie is Team Teddy and Nikki is Team Johnny. Brie leads a T-E-D-D-Y cheer. That’s just what this feud needed: THE BELLAS!

Jack Swagger vs. Zack Ryder

Apparently Lillian legitimately screwed up the entrance and called Ryder “The Long Island Iced Z, Jack Swagger.” The fans are WAY into Ryder. They better be careful or he’ll get sent down to NXT. He controls to start and hammers on Swagger but Jack moves out of the way in the corner. Swagger uses almost a judo throw to take Ryder down and throws on a top wristlock.

Ryder gets his knees up in the corner and starts his comeback. He slams Swagger’s face into the mat and hits the Broski Boot for two. Rough Ryder is countered into a buckle bomb followed by it’s Vader cousin for two. Horny chases Vickie onto the apron and the distraction allows the Rough Ryder to get the pin at 4:30.

Rating: C-. I’m glad to see Ryder get his win back but it’s negated by the general annoyance factor brought on by Hornswoggle being out there. That guy gets annoying fast. Anyway, decent match and it’s good to see Ryder back and winning matches (mostly) clean. Him getting on Mania will be good too, even though he’ll be on the losing team.

We get a clip from Monday of Cody attacking Big Show.

Earlier today, Cody says he’s been enjoying embarrassing Big Show lately. The biggest embarrassment is going to be at Mania though. Knucklehead 2 perhaps? Cody leaves, saying he has a plane to catch. Then why did you come to the arena?

Big Show vs. Kane

Show starts off fast and runs over Kane. He hammers away and Kane bails to the floor. Kane sends Show into the post and hits the low dropkick back in the ring. Kane hooks a chinlock but Show gets up and they clothesline each other. Show gets up and starts pounding on Kane but the big fried freak comes back with a DDT for two. Kane goes up but jumps into a chokeslam. Cody runs in for the DQ at 3:45.

Rating: D. This continues to be nothing. These two never have clicked at all so keeping it short like this was probably the best idea. Cody running in was pretty obvious as he did the same thing on Monday. I guess they were out of stuff to do in this feud so they’re just having Cody cost Show matches, even though he gave him a win here.

Show chases Rhodes into the crowd. Orton comes in and RKOs Kane.

Same anti-bullying video from Raw.

Brodus Clay vs. Heath Slater

Brodus is in green tonight. Notice that the announcers have stopped seeming to have a blast when he comes out. It’s like they’ve been told to cool it or something. Slater dropkicks the knee out and hits an enziguri, perhaps becoming the first person to ever cover Brodus. Brodus comes back with his usual and the splash ends this in 1:24. This guy needs a feud in the worst way. Throw him on Team Teddy if nothing else.

Ryder runs into Eve in the back and they say they’re both going to Wrestlemania. Zack says she’s beautiful and smart, which Eve takes as an insult because she thinks Ryder sounds like it was a recent development. She storms off, saying their dinner is off. This is going to go on for a long time isn’t it?

Raw ReBound is about the three way talking session that didn’t say anything new from the end of Raw.

Great Khali vs. Dolph Ziggler

Christian is on commentary. Cole again points out how one sided the team situation is and how serious one side is while how goofy the other is. Christian gets a text from Johnny, who is all of 8 feet from him. Khali throws Ziggler around and chops him down. Ziggler gets in a shot and hammers away as Booker argues with Booker. Christian wants Cole to be Team Johnny’s mascot. Khali comes back with his array of clotheslines but the chop misses. Sleeper goes on and Ace rings the bell at 2:42, Montreal style. Yep, that just happened.

Teddy says hang on a minute and restarts it. Ziggler is given to ten to get back in and doesn’t get back in. Santino and Kofi throw him in anyway and Khali chops him down. I’m already sick of this feud because there are SO many people in it and there are still two more to be added.

CM Punk/Sheamus vs. The Miz/Daniel Bryan

Is there any logical reason for Jericho not to be in this? Sheamus and Bryan start but Bryan immediately tags out. Sheamus takes over with a headlock and clothesline and it’s time for Punk. The slingshot shoulder brings Sheamus back in and gets two. Irish Curse gets two. Sheamus pulls Bryan in but the distraction lets Miz knock him to the floor and Bryan adds a knee to the head as we take a break.

Back with Miz kicking Sheamus in the head and putting on a chinlock. A backdrop gets Sheamus out of trouble and he makes the tag to Punk. The champ comes in with a springboard clothesline and the running knee/bulldog combo takes Miz down. He loads up the Macho Elbow but Bryan distracts him down. Miz hits the low DDT for two and it’s time for champion vs. champion.

Bryan chokes Punk out and we get a Danny Boy chant. Booker says Miz has been surpassed by his former pupil. Miz gets in a shot to the back to keep Punk from getting momentum and then adds a kneelift for two. Punk takes Miz down and there’s the tag, resulting in Bryan running for his life. Sheamus cleans house and hits the forearms to the chest of Bryan. The Brogue Kick kills Miz at 6:43 shown of 10:13.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t really into this one because the ending could be seen coming a mile away. Bryan running from Sheamus is kind of interesting I guess because it’s the story of his title reign, but I’m hoping at Mania that he finally gets caught. Other than that, nothing to see here because Punk has no reason to want to fight either of his opponents here.

Overall Rating: C. This was an ok show and that’s about it. They’re in full on Mania push mode at this point and that can become a problem. Much like Raw, there’s not much to see on these shows because the PPV has been set for weeks now. Not a bad show or anything, but other than Ryder and Khali being added to Team Teddy, there’s nothing here that’s new material.

Results
Mark Henry b. R-Truth – World’s Strongest Slam
AJ b. Brie Bella – Rollup
Zack Ryder b. Jack Swagger – Rough Ryder
Big Show b. Kane via DQ when Cody Rhodes interfered
Brodus Clay b. Heath Slater – Big Splash
Great Khali b. Dolph Ziggler via countout
CM Punk/Sheamus b. The Miz/Daniel Bryan – Brogue Kick to Miz

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Smackdown – March 16, 2012: AJ Vs. Bryan Has More Friction Than Bryan Vs. Sheamus

Smackdown
Date: March 16, 2012
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Josh Matthews

It’s that time of the week again. It’s time for absolutely nothing being done about Bryan vs. Sheamus because that match means nothing in the grand scheme of Wrestlemania. Odds are we’ll hear more about the battling GM’s and that’s about it. I haven’t heard anything announced for tonight yet so it’ll be a surprise to me as well. Let’s get to it.

Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine at the moment is Iowa St. They need to be defeated Saturday.

Here’s Christian to open the show with the Peep Show. He looks healthy now at least. Christian gets a nice reaction but Booker informs us that Christian is looking down at all of us. He talks about the 12 man tag match at Mania and says that it’ll change a lot in WWE. Christian brings out Ace and Otunga as well as Teddy who comes out with Aksana. R-Truth is officially part of Team Long.

Christian says let the bidding begin on his services and Teddy gets to go first. Teddy looks at him so Christian goes on a small rant and says make it worth his while. He says to give Christian what he deserves: one more match. Teddy tells Christian he’s awesome but won’t beg him to be part of the team. Once Teddy takes over both shows, you have to earn title shots and they won’t get one if they get on his nerves. So in other words, earn it, but make sure you suck up at the same time?

Ace says that Christian should be on his team and guarantees Christian a title match if Team Ace wins. Christian says he won’t fail, unlike Teddy. He officially joins Team Ace. Christian’s music plays but Teddy says hang on a minute. He says Christian will be in action tonight but Ace says no because he isn’t medically cleared tonight. Instead, Otunga gets to face the newest member of Team Teddy.

David Otunga vs. Kofi Kingston

This is joined in progress as we come back from a break. Ace is on commentary and Christian and Santino are at ringside. Teddy is on commentary too. Kofi kicks away to start but Otunga avoids him to take over. Cole and Teddy argue as Otunga pounds away. Christian can’t compete because of an ingrown toenail. Powerslam gets two for David. Teddy and Ace argue about ingrown toenails as Otunga poses.

Off to a chinlock as Cole talks about baseball. Thankfully Josh actually talks about the match even a little bit to get us back to some sanity. Otunga hits a clothesline in the corner and then a second one. Booker says Otunga would have been better off in the WBF. That’s allowed to be mentioned? Kofi comes back with a cross body for two and a dropkick to put David down. He loads up the Boom Drop but Christian trips Kofi. Teddy points it out so Christian is ejected. The GM’s argue and Cole says something about the IC Title. Otunta tries to hit Kofi with his belt but Santino stops him. Trouble in Paradise ends this at 5:40.

Rating: C-. In a roughly five and a half minute match, we had attempted weapon use, two interferences, a fight between the GM’s, and a WBF reference. Who in the world thought this match needed that much to it? The match was just ok and it’s good to see Otunga getting some time to be on offense.

Bryan is outside the Divas locker room and AJ comes out in a little black dress. AJ says this dress Bryan bought her doesn’t seem to fit. Bryan: “It looked much better on the mannequin.” Bryan talks about how they need to be the new power couple so he’s gotten her a match tonight where a win could get her a Divas title match.

AJ vs. Nikki Bella

Bryan comes out to be in AJ’s corner. Nikki gets on her knees because AJ is short so AJ dropkicks her in the face. Bryan is coaching AJ from the floor. Nikki stands on AJ’s hair and pulls her up. Booker thinks AJ doesn’t want to be in the ring. Off to a chinlock as Booker goes on a long and stupid rant about how AJ shouldn’t be in there and doesn’t want this. Josh and Cole agree that it’s stupid because she’s a wrestler and that’s her job. AJ comes back with a cross body and Twin Magic fails. AJ grabs a rollup for the pin at 2:27.

Bryan celebrates post match. Booker says Bryan is ruining AJ’s career and that wasn’t a win. WHAT IS HE TALKING ABOUT???

Sheamus vs. Jericho later.

Raw ReBound shortens the Rap vs. Rock deal to about three minutes.

Cody talks about how dominant Big Show is 364 days out of the year, but at Wrestlemania he’s a choke artist. This match also has more story than Sheamus vs. Bryan.

Great Khali vs. Cody Rhodes

Khali easily overpowers him to start and chops Rhodes a lot. Cody grabs a single arm DDT which Khali can’t sell right so Cody works over the arm. Booker says go for the legs, even though Cody has Khali down already. Now it’s to the knees for a bit but Cody goes up and jumps into a chop. Khali loads up a chop but Cody heads to the apron and hits an enziguri. A dropkick to the knee sets up the Beautiful Disaster for the pin at 3:13.

Rating: C-. Cody beating a giant is a good idea heading into Wrestlemania. It worked for Luger when he was getting ready to face Giant back in 1996. It might work a littl ebetter if there was more than one face giant to face before Big Show but you get the idea. Cole called this a huge upset for no apparent reason.

Video on the Central American tour.

Here’s Orton with something to say. He says he usually doesn’t come out here to talk when he has a problem with someone but instead he hunts them down. However he feels like he’s being hunted by Kane. Orton wants to know why Kane has chosen him. Kane wants people to embrace hate and Orton is embracing it as well. He calls out Kane for an explanation. Well forced exposition is better than no exposition I guess. Orton wants to know why he’s putting Kane down when it eventually happens.

Here’s the Big Fried Freak who talks about how Orton doesn’t like being in the unknown. Usually he’d like to see Orton all unsure but since Orton asked, Kane will tell him. At least he’s polite. We get a clip from last year where Orton beat Kane in a street fight and post match Kane offered a handshake which Orton accepted. I don’t remember that but maybe it was a post show thing.

Kane says he watches that footage every day because it reminds him of what he had become: something with humanity. Kane says he’s a monster again but he needs closure, which he’ll get by destroying Orton. Orton says come get me but Kane says we’ll do it at Wrestlemania. That gets us to eight matches which is acceptable.

Go to the David Otunga law offices!

Here’s Drew for a match. Teddy pops up on screen and says Drew has a one year contract that can’t be broken. Here’s Drew’s first opponent.

Drew McIntyre vs. Big Show

Show powers him around to start with pure power. McIntyre comes back with some kicks but Futureshock is broken up and Show spears him down. Show chokeslams him but decides to punch him instead of covering him. Show goes over to him and the referee stops it at 1:52. That’s an odd ending.

Mark Henry vs. Yoshi Tatsu

Yoshi immediately dropkicks him but Henry glares at him. Henry takes over with power and powerslams Yoshi into dust. World’s Strongest Slam ends this in about 2:00.

Here’s Jericho to talk a bit before the main event. He talks about how he’s been requested to apologize for what he said on Monday about Punk’s family. There’s no need to apologize for the truth. Punk has all the signs of an alcoholic such as the tattoos and trying to hide. Jericho talks about how the Pipe Bombs are things Punk wants to say to his parents. He’s the best in the world and he’s going to prove it by winning the world title at Mania. Afterwards, he’s going to make a stiff cocktail and toast Punk and Punk’s father. He starts a CM Drunk chant and says Pipe Bomb.

Sheamus vs. Chris Jericho

Sheamus knocks him into the corner to start and Jericho bails to the floor. That goes nowhere as Sheamus takes him back inside and gets two. Jericho gets sent over the corner and out to the floor in a crash. There are the ten forearms to the chest which Booker calls musical chairs. A delayed vertical suplex gets two for Sheamus. This has been one sided thus far.

Just as I say that, Jericho low bridges him to send Sheamus to the floor. A baseball slide sends Sheamus into the barricade. Bryan and AJ (now in matching colors) come out to watch as we take a break. Back with Jericho still in control. The big red welt on Sheamus’ back is still there after crashing into the table on Monday. Jericho hits a belly to back suplex as we hear about Jericho’s Vengeance 2001 accomplishments.

Jericho loads up the running bulldog but Sheamus sends him into the corner to counter. Sheamus comes back with his double ax handles and the Irish Curse for two. The rolling fireman’s carry slam looks to set up White Noise but Jericho counters into a Codebreaker attempt. Sheamus puts him on the top rope but the Brogue Kick misses. Jericho hits the bulldog and Lionsault for two. Sheamus pulls himself to the top but gets crotched. Jericho gets knocked to the mat and Sheamus hits the top rope shoulder for two.

Celtic Cross is loaded up but Jericho rolls down the back and counters into the Walls. Since Sheamus is a top face though he manages to get the ropes to break it up. Another Celtic Cross is loaded up but Jericho escapes again. They go to the floor and Sheamus throws Jericho over towards Bryan and AJ but they move. Sheamus stares at Bryan but Jericho rams him into the table. Bryan kicks Sheamus in the head as Jericho is getting back in and Chris wins by countout at 10:52 shown of 14:22.

Rating: B. I was digging this one and I can live with the ending because it serves a better purpose. It was obvious neither guy was going to go over clean here which is ok, but they still need to give us something else to care about with Sheamus vs. Bryan. The AJ stuff is kind of there on the side and I don’t know if they’re going to be able to have it mean anything for the PPV.

Sheamus kicks Jericho’s head off to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. I like this one more than I’ve liked most of their shows lately. This did a good job of pushing a lot of the matches for Mania which is really all you can do with two weeks left. Orton vs. Kane has a story (not a great one but a story nonetheless) now and we FINALLY get a little friction between Bryan vs. Sheamus. It doesn’t mean anything but it’s better than leaving them apart. Good show here though and a good Mania build show.

Results
Kofi Kingston b. David Otunga – Trouble in Paradise
AJ b. Nikki Bella – Rollup
Cody Rhodes b. Great Khali – Beautiful Disaster
Big Show b. Drew McIntyre by referee stoppage
Mark Henry b. Yoshi Tatsu – World’s Strongest Slam
Chris Jericho b. Sheamus via countout

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