Iconic Tag Teams Earliest Appearances Collection
Commentators: Gordon Solie, Keith Hart, Jim Ross, Mr. Perfect, Vince McMahon, Jim Ross, Michael Hayes, Dean Hill, Jim Cornette, Byron Saxton, Kevin Patrick, Bruno Sammartino, Al Snow

This is part of Tag Team Week on the WWE Vault and in this case it’s a look back at when some famous tag teams first got together. I’m going to assume there is an unseen asterisk that says “on television in a big promotion” but I’ll take what I can get. This has the potential to be rather interesting so let’s get to it.

From a Smackdown dark match, September 16, 2003.

Paul London/Spanky vs. Albert/Sean O’Haire

What a random heel team. Albert shoves Spanky (Brian Kendrick) down to start and unloads on him in the corner. Spanky gets in some right hands of his own but O’Haire comes in for a chop. It’s off to London to strike away but Albert cuts him off, including the catapult into the bottom rope for two.

O’Haire plants him in the corner for two and the slow beating ensues. London manages a double knockdown with O’Haire though and it’s Spanky coming in to pick up the pace. Albert charges into a boot in the corner and Spanky hits a tornado DDT for two. London and O’Haire go outside, leaving Spanky to reverse the Baldo Bomb into a bulldog. O’Haire interrupts though and Albert’s over the shoulder backbreaker finishes Spanky at 7:49.

Rating: C+. That’s quite the interesting tryout, as rather than getting a win over the makeshift team, London and Spanky lose in their first time out. I’m not sure the point of that as it’s not like the masses were going to see it, but you could see the chemistry already coming together. A fast paced young team is something that works almost every time and London/Spanky did it very well.

From Georgia Championship Wrestling TV, June 11, 1983.

Road Warriors vs. Randy Barber/Joe Young

And yes, this actually is their first time teaming together (at least on television). They’re also in matching leather hats and vests, with Paul Ellering wearing a snazzy top hat. The Warriors are also the National Tag Team Champions, winning the titles in a tournament that didn’t actually happen. Hawk drives Barber into the corner and it’s off to Animal to drop a leg. Young comes in and gets forearmed in the corner, followed by a double clothesline. A slingshot splash finishes for Hawk at 2:05. Total squash, as it should have been.

From a WWE house show, October 4, 2014.

Kofi Kingston/Xavier Woods vs. Stardust/Goldust

I’m not sure if Goldust and Stardust’s Raw Tag Team Titles are on the line here or not but Big E. is here with the not yet New Day. Actually Stardust clarifies that this is NOT a title match, which is some nice attention to detail. After confirming that we are in Trenton, New Jersey and arguing about whether or not the town is awful, we’re ready to go with Kingston and Stardust starting tings off.

They fight over a top wristlock and then trade some flips, with Stardust stopping to dance. Kingston sticks the landing on a monkey flip and sends Stardust into the corner for the tag off to Woods. The Honor Roll gets two and it’s time to work on Stardust’s arm. Kingston’s high crossbody gets two but Stardust takes him up against the ropes for a shot from Goldust. Kingston is right back with a jumping back elbow and Woods gets two off a middle rope clothesline as the fans are only somewhat into this.

They fight to the floor for something we can’t see (single stationary camera and all that) and come back inside for Goldust’s chinlock on Woods. That doesn’t last long so it’s the snap powerslam so Stardust can come back in to stomp away. Another chinlock goes on and for a bit longer this time, though Woods is able to shove off the ensuing bulldog attempt. Kingston comes back in to clean house and everything breaks down. The referee tries to get Woods out, leaving a springboard spinning kick to the head Hart Attack to drop Kingston for two. Woods is back up for UpUpDownDown to pin Goldust at 10:43.

Rating: C+. Much like London and Spanky, you could see the foundations from the start here, though they had a long way to go with the details. What mattered the most was Kingston and Woods (with Big E. of course) working well together. They had the athleticism and natural chemistry and those are the kinds of things that are either there or not from the start.

From Stampede Wrestling, July 11, 1983.

Dynamite Kid/Davey Boy Smith vs. Cuban Assassin/Ciclon Negro

As tends to be the case, we’re joined in progress with a brawl on the floor before Assassin takes Kid (bleeding from an attack by Bad News Allen earlier in the night) inside. Smith, who was jumped earlier as well, tries to make a save but gets tossed as well. We settle down to Negro hammering on Kid up against the ropes but he accidentally elbows Assassin. The tag brings Smith back in to clean house, including letting Negro hit Assassin AGAIN.

A dropkick takes Assassin down, followed by a headscissors and headlock takeover at the same time (a big spot in 1983). The villains finally get it together and send Smith into the corner, which lasts all of a few seconds before it’s back to the rather bloody Kid. Some flips and clotheslines have Negro down but he manages a knee to the ribs to cut Kid off. Negro runs into Assassin for the third time in less than five minutes, allowing Kid to drop a knee for the pin at 5:45.

Rating: C. I wasn’t feeling this one as much as it came off more like the villains screwing up more than Kid and Smith winning. They idea of Kid and Smith being in trouble and having to overcome adversity was fine, but it didn’t feel like they were better. The Assassin and Negro seemed to run out of ideas rather quickly and that only helped the good guys so much.

From Superstars, June 1, 1996.

New Rockers vs. Hardy Boyz

The entrances let commentary plug the Ultimate Warrior’s comic book and you can hear Vince hating it. Cassidy and Matt start things off with Cassidy easily taking him down. Jeff is pulled in and the Hardys are sent outside, setting up some dives and….I guess dancing from the Rockers. Commentary isn’t sure what is wrong with Jannetty and that is an essay question we don’t have time to answer.

Jeff’s bandanna is pulled over his eyes to keep up the beating. Cassidy gets in a nasty spinning belly to belly and a double elbow drops Jeff for two. The Rockers get Jeff up for a kind of Alley Oop/top rope bulldog combination (which doesn’t really work for the most part) for the pin at 3:41.

Rating: C+. Total destruction and it’s bizarre to see, but the Hardys would wind up being fine while the New Rockers are a punch line. The Rockers were little more than a running joke and they weren’t going to be a big deal, but they were still decent enough in the ring. This was more of a case of the Hardys being a detail, but you have to start somewhere.

From the Global Wrestling Federation, April 17, 1992.

Ebony Experience vs. Brute Force

This might be interesting as you might not know which is the important team. In this case it would be the Experience, who would show up in WCW the next year as Harlem Heat. If you’ve never heard of Global….well just be lucky actually, as it was not very good. Booker is backed up to the ropes by #1 to start as Gorgeous Gary Young joins commentary to scout. Stevie comes in with a double clothesline to clear the ring. #2 comes in and gets kneed in the face as Young isn’t overly impressed so far.

Booker gets clotheslined down but pops up with the yet to be named Spinarooni, only to get taken into the wrong corner. Commentary remembers that Brute Force are actually Slammer and Jammer (I’m guessing someone gave him a note) as Booker misses a charge into the corner. Jammer (I guess, though I can’t imagine it matters) misses a dropkick but avoids a clothesline. Booker is back up with a clothesline, allowing the tag off to Ray (commentary gets the Experience confused) as everything breaks down. Jammer shoves the referee down and it’s a DQ at 5:54.

Rating: C-. While this wasn’t the team’s debut (they had begun teaming in the late 80s), it was their first spot in a bigger promotion. You could see the team working together well, which makes sense for brothers. Brute Force was….well hey did you see the Experience? They were pretty good.

Post match we get a tease of an interview with BARRY HOROWITZ but we have to go to the next match. Dang it that’s such an unfair tease.

From a Wrestling Challenge dark match, April 5, 1993.

Kip Winchester/Barry vs. Barry Horowitz/Reno Riggins

I’m guessing the ring announcer got confused, as Winchester’s partner is named Brett Colt and the team will eventually be known as the Smoking Gunns (the better known Billy and Bart Gunn names would come with their next dark match). We take a good while for the Gunns to be ready and the women REALLY seem to approve. Or maybe they’re fans of Horowitz’s mullet. Either way, Billy (er, Kip) grabs a headlock, followed by a hiptoss into an armbar. Bart (er…eh I did that joke already) comes in to stay on the arm and an assisted Russian legsweep gets two.

Riggins avoids a crossbody and Bart is taken into the wrong corner so the alternating beatdowns can ensue. Horowitz’s catapult sends him into the bottom rope and a northern lights suplex gets two. The abdominal stretch goes on for a bit, followed by Horowitz’s jawbreaker for two more. The chinlock is broken up and a collision gives us a double down. Billy comes in to clean house with some dropkicks and a powerslam plants Riggins. A spinning side slam plants Riggins again and Billy hits a not great looking top rope bulldog for the pin at 8:41 (and Barry is suddenly Brett Colt).

Rating: C. The Gunns were basically what they would become right out of the gate and that’s fine. The cowboy trope has been done for decades in wrestling and it still works here. Throw in something like the cap guns they fired off before the match and you easily get the idea of the team. It’s not a good or memorable match at all, but it was a case of what you see is what you get, which is fine.

From WCW TV, June 10, 1989.

Steiner Brothers vs. The Raider/Snake Brown

The Steiners had already had some house show matches but close enough. Also, Raider is Randy Barber, who was in the Road Warriors’ first match as well. Rick has a big fan in the crowd and gives her his jacket in a nice moment. Scott powerslams Raider down and gives hands it off to Rick, who runs both of them over. The Steiners clear the ring, allowing Rick to jump onto Scott’s back for a bit. Brown comes in and gets caught with Scott’s spinning belly to belly, followed by Rick’s overhead version. An elbow gives Rick the pin at 1:47.

Post match the Varsity Club comes in and get beaten up in a hurry before their match at the Clash Of Champions the next week.

From OVW TV, April 17, 2004.

Joey Matthews/Johnny Nitro vs. Matt Cappotelli/Maven

Melina is here with Matthews and Nitro. We’re joined in progress with Matthews getting beaten down and sent outside for the introductions and opening bell. Matthews gets elbowed in the face by Maven, allowing Cappotelli to come in for a legdrop. A double clothesline drops Nitro and Matthews with Nitro bailing to the floor. That lets Nitro hide behind Melina and Matthews gets in a cheap shot from behind.

Back in and a bridging northern lights suplex gets two on Cappotelli, allowing Nitro to come in. An uppercut to the back of the neck gets two but Matthews accidentally crashes into Nitro. Cappotelli bulldogs his way over to Maven to clean house, including a missile dropkick for two on Nitro with Matthews making the save. Melina comes in to rake Maven’s eyes and Nitro’s spinning fisherman’s suplex finishes at 4:50.

Rating: C. Now this was a case where the team had a lot of development to go, as MNM was pretty much just there in name only. They were all there, but they didn’t have the look or gimmick whatsoever. That would come in time, but for now it was pretty much Morrison’s athleticism carrying things. As for the match, you’re in a bit of trouble when Maven is your biggest star.

From Main Event, September 16, 2021 (oddly enough the last episode I watched when I was regularly covering Main Event).

Humberto Carrillo/Angel Garza vs. Lucha House Party

Carrillo and Garza (Los Garza) being introduced as “iconic” is more than a bit of a stretch. Carrillo and Metalik trade some armdrags to start before Dorado comes in with a top rope hurricanrana. The pop up dropkick sends Garza outside and the Party hit stereo flip dives as we take a break.

We come back with Metalik hitting a top rope splash for two and grabbing a chinlock on Carrillo. That’s broken up and it’s back to Garza for a backbreaker. Carrillo suplexes Metalik for two more but Metalik is back with a super hurricanrana. Dorado gets the tag and cleans some house, including a running headscissors to Garza. A nice superkick sets up a high crossbody for two, followed by the Golden Rewind. Metalik’s moonsault sets up Dorado’s moonsault for two as Garza makes the save. Garza comes in, TAKES OFF HIS PANTS, and hits the Wing Clipper for the pin at 6:02.

Rating: C+. This was one of the better matches thus far, which shouldn’t be a surprise as it takes a bit more time to get to WWE TV (as low as Main Event might be) than some of the other places these matches have aired. Carrillo and Garza are far from “iconic”, but I guess they needed to fill in some time. The House Party is something that can work at pretty much any time and they were starting to click when they were split up.

From an AWA house show, April 19, 1987.

Tag Team Tournament First Round: Nasty Boys vs. Curt Hennig/Greg Gagne

The Nastys (Brian Knobbs and Jerry Saganowich (his real name), as they were still workshopping the whole thing) are in their second match together, which I think we can call close enough. Hennig and Knobbs start things off with Knobbs ducking a right hand, which hits Gagne instead.

Back up and Hennig stares at Knobbs a bit before Knobbs drops him with a shoulder. Sags comes in and gets caught with a running dropkick into an armdrag as apparently Knobbs is the key to the team. It’s back to Knobbs for a clothesline so Sags comes back in. That’s fine with Hennig, as he and Gagne take turns working on the leg. Gagne sits on the leg and grabs a standing Figure Four.

With that broken up, so Gagne kicks the leg out again and cranks away. More kicks finally draw Knobbs in for the save before he gets in legally, with a headlock takeover to Hennig. Sags distracts the referee so Knobbs can choke away in the corner but Hennig gets in a shoulder for the double down. The stereo tags bring in Gagne and Sags, with the former getting in a double noggin knocker. The dropkick hits Sags and Hennig’s missile dropkick finishes at 10:54.

Rating: C+. The Nasty Boys weren’t really close to what they would become here, as they more or less wrestled a really basic match rather than their traditional brawling style. Putting them in there with a team as experienced as Hennig and Gagne was smart as they can help with anyone, though the Boys had a long way to go. That being said, they picked it up fast, which is all the more impressive.

From (I believe) WWC, October 14, 1987.

Wild Samoans vs. Miguel Ramos/Sabu

It isn’t the famous Samoans, but rather Fatu and Samu, who would become known as the Headshrinkers. It’s also not the famous Sabu, but rather the wrestler who would be better known as Invader #1. Samu takes Sabu back into to the corner to start and gives him an early slam. A spinwheel kick drops Sabu again and it’s off to Fatu for a belly to back suplex/clothesline combination. Ramos comes in and is immediately knocked down for a falling headbutt. With Sabu knocked to the floor, a belly to back superplex sets up a Superfly Splash to give Fatu the pin at 4:09.

Rating: C. This was kind of a weird pick as the team was pretty much nothing like what they would become. This was more the Samoan Gangster Party under a different name and as a longtime Headshrinkers fan, I’m glad they made the change. The top rope splash looked great as usual though, and stuff like that was enough to give the team a chance.

From Championship Wrestling, April 20, 1985.

Hart Foundation vs. Mario Mancini/SD Jones

Jimmy Hart is here with the Foundation. Neidhart powers Jones up against the ropes to start and they trade some shoves. Mancini comes in to work on the arm and is quickly forearmed down. Hart adds a dropkick and rakes Mancini’s eyes over the rope. The Hart Attack finishes at 2:39. Total squash, with the finish looking great of course.

From OVW TV, May 24, 2006.

Southern Tag Team Titles: Cryme Tyme vs. Kasey James/Roadkill

James and Roadkill are defending. James and the Neighborhoodie (JTG) start things off with the latter grabbing some early slams. Neighborhoodie leapfrogs him and stops to dance, only to walk into a slam from James. Roadkill comes in for a World’s Strongest Slam but a Vader Bomb misses. It’s off to Gaspard to kick Roadkill down for two and Neighborhoodie adds a pop up splash in the corner.

Roadkill fights out of the corner without too much trouble though and it’s back to James to pick up the pace. Gaspard is there to cut him off before missing a splash. That’s enough for Roadkill to come back in and clean house, including a Boss Man Slam for two on Neighborhoodie. Everything breaks down with James and then Roadkill hitting some running corner splashes. Roadkill’s top rope splash connects but cue Cherry for a distraction. Deuce N Domino run in with Cherry’s skates to knock Roadkill silly and put Neighborhoodie on top for the pin and the titles at 6:25.

Rating: C. This was a rather odd choice to end on, as Cryme Tyme was more of a product of their time than anything remotely important long term. The Neighborhoodie was basically the same as he would be as JTG, while Gaspard needed some adjustments. The gimmick didn’t seem to be there yet either, but that’s the point of being in developmental.

Overall Rating: C+. The thing to remember here is that these were the teams’ first (or close enough) appearances. They all needed to be fine tuned to become the versions that would work during their heydays. That being said, for what is in essence a bunch of prequels, this was a fun look back, even with some rather odd choices for teams. They could easily do something else like this, and that’s something I could definitely see happening with the way the Vault goes.

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We’re one day before Summerslam and that means this is going to be the big push towards the show. That could go in a variety of ways, though I’m not sure how much I’d expect from what was definitively the B show at this point. It’s not a great time for the company either, but there is some talent worth seeing. Let’s get to it.

Superstars
Date: August 17, 1996
Location: Yakima Sun Dome, Yakima, Washington
Attendance: 2,922
Commentators: Jim Ross, Vince McMahon, Mr. Perfect

The opening recap looks at Ahmed Johnson needing surgery and having to vacate the Intercontinental Title.

Opening sequence, which is a country style theme (and sounds like it’s being sung by Michael Hayes).

Commentary runs down the card.

Undertaker vs. Who

Paul Bearer is here with Undertaker (in what would be the last time for the original team, at least when it comes to a traditional entrance). Who jumps him to start and hammers away in the corner, earning himself a jumping clothesline. The Tombstone finishes fast at 1:08.

Ahmed Johnson, in a snazzy red robe, talks about how the mental pain is worse than the physical pain.

We look at Johnson’s recent success and how everything has stopped, with the Intercontinental Title being vacated. A tournament is starting next week on Raw, but it isn’t clear if or when Johnson will return to the ring. There will also be a mini battle royal for his previously won WWF Title shot.

It’s off to Slam Jam, with the big final push of Summerslam.

Jerry Lawler is ready to make Jake Roberts see a lot of doubles, just like when he’s drunk!

Roberts is ready to get revenge on Lawler.

Savio Vega/Freddie Joe Floyd vs. Uncle Zebekiah/Justin Hawk Bradshaw

This is fallout from Zebekiah and Bradshaw branding Vega. Zebekiah bails to the floor so Vega hammers on Bradshaw, with Floyd coming in for a double dropkick. Floyd kicks Bradshaw in the case for a quick two as the rapid tags continue. Bradshaw finally manages to kick Floyd out to the floor as commentary talks about the Summerslam Tag Team Title match. Zebekiah gets in a clothesline on the floor and it’s a double team in the corner to keep Floyd in trouble as we take a break.

We come back with Vega having to save Floyd but that’s not enough for the actual tag. Bradshaw grabs a Russian legsweep for two but a jumping back elbow gets Floyd out of trouble. Vega comes in to clean house, with a spinning kick to the face getting two on Zebekiah as everything breaks down. Zebekiah misses a branding iron shot to Vega and gets rolled up for the fast pin at 9:37.

Rating: C+. This is what you would get on Superstars around this point, as it was more about giving something to the lower level stars. Vega vs. Bradshaw might not be a top level feud but it is at least a story and something that got a few weeks to build. Floyd might not be a top level star, but he’s more than good in the ring. Zebekiah is fine as a second for Bradshaw, as long as you understand that he’s so banged up from a harsh career that he can’t do much in the ring.

Post match the brawl stays on with Floyd getting double teamed until Vega makes the save with the branding iron.

Video on Shawn Michaels vs. Vader, with Vader pinning Michaels at In Your House: International Incident. Michaels knows that he is in danger and wants the Kliq to support him more than ever.

Crush vs. Aldo Montoya

Clarence Mason is here with Crush. Montoya gets knocked down to start and the neck crank is already on. Crush thumbs him in the neck and the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker cuts off Montoya’s comeback attempt. The big clothesline sends Montoya outside and Crush powers him inside without much trouble. A shoulder breaker into the full nelson finishes for Crush at 3:11.

Rating: C. Crush is someone who got chance after chance and while it could have been worse, he never became the star that the company seemed to want him to be. Granted putting him in there with Mason wasn’t the best way to go, as Mason wasn’t going to make Crush feel important. For now though, not a terrible start for Crush’s singles run, but I’m not getting my hopes up.

Video on Undertaker vs. Mankind.

Mankind vs. Billy Two Eagles

Mankind hammers him down into the corner to start and shrugs off a boot to the face. A swinging neckbreaker (with Mankind pulling the hair of course), setting up the Mandible Claw for the fast win at 1:48.

Another Slam Jam looks at the Tag Team Title match, with the Smoking Gunns/Sunny thinking that the company is against them. The Bodydonnas just want the titles back.

The Stalker talks about wanting to hunt various people. The introduction called him Barry Windham, so why not just let him be that?

Sunny teases various limited material swimsuits for the Summerslam pre-show.

Steve Austin vs. Marc Mero

Sable is here with Mero, who knocks him into the corner to start. They go outside, where Austin yells a lot and kicks him in the ribs to take over. Back in and Mero takes him down into an armbar as Marlena and Goldust joins commentary. Goldust talks about being a zookeeper at Summerslam as Austin makes the comeback and knees Mero in the head. We take a break and come back with Austin holding a chinlock. Mero fights up and snaps off a headscissors as Mankind comes out to tell Sable (“Mommy”) that he’s been a naughty boy. Mero goes after him for the save and that’s a DQ at 9:43.

Rating: C+. The match was pretty good, which shouldn’t be a surprise given who was involved, but dang there was too much going on with the whole thing. The ending was a bit of a cheap way to prevent both of them from losing, but at least the match wasn’t boring. Just slow down a bit next time.

Post match the brawl is on until Undertaker comes out for the save, with Sable running away in terror to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Well, the show was designed to make me more interested in seeing Summerslam and that went well enough. At the same time, Summerslam 1996 is only so interesting of a show in the first place. It’s an absolute two match show and pretty much nothing more, with what we got on here not exactly being enough to carry it that much higher. The action here was fine, but it was very clear that Raw was the thing and had been for a very long time.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: June 28, 1993
Location: Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie, New York
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, Bobby Heenan

It’s the last show of the month and the big story coming out of last week is Razor Ramon’s continued frustrations with the 1-2-3 Kid. Last week Ramon still couldn’t beat the Kid, who ran off with the $10,000 Ramon was putting up. Other than that, we’re coming up on the Yokozuna bodyslam challenge, which could be rather interesting. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Kamala

Michaels, with Diesel, is defending. They take their time to start with Michaels offering a handshake, which allows him to knock Kamala into the corner. Kamala doesn’t care for that and bites the finger before knocking Michaels out to the floor. Back in and Kamala charges into some raised knees in the corner as we take a break.

We come back with Kamala’s bearhug being broken up with a rake to the eyes, allowing Michaels to stomp away. Michaels avoids a charge in the corner and goes after the leg, though the Figure Four attempt is blocked. Kamala kicks him into the corner and starts chopping away, setting up the splash to the back. As usual, Kamala doesn’t quite have the pinning thing down so Diesel gets on the apron. That’s enough for Michaels to hit a superkick to the back of the head for the pin at 11;15.

Rating: C-. Michaels is an all time star but there is only so much you can do in this situation. Kamala’s good guy run was a stretch on its best day and then it was hard to make something like this work. Diesel being involved in the ending helped establish him, but the idea of Michaels needing help against Kamala is a stretch at best.

Post match Kamala goes after Michaels but Diesel makes the save.

Here are Yokozuna and company for a chat. Mr. Fuji is ready to humiliate various American athletes at the bodyslam challenge but Vince McMahon warns him that America is kind of amazing. Someone will step up and hit a home run, though Fuji doesn’t seem convinced. Yokozuna calls American athletes inferior, just like American products, so McMahon gets a USA chant going. It was weird to hear McMahon be so one sided in a story like this, but it shows how big of a villain Yokozuna really is.

Various athletes, including Tatanka, say they can slam Yokozuna.

Smoking Gunns vs. Iron Mike Sharpe/Barry Horowitz

Billy and Sharpe start things off with Billy clearing both jobbers out in a hurry. Bart comes in for a crisscross into a small package for two on Sharpe, followed by the armbar. It’s off to Horowitz, who avoids a crossbody to actually take over. A northern lights suplex doesn’t get Horowitz very far as Bart is back up for the tag off to Billy. The Sidewinder finishes Horowitz at 4:25.

Rating: C. The Gunns are only going to be able to go so far, but at the same time, the tag division isn’t exactly strong at this point so they only have to be so good. They have a time honored gimmick and the Sidewinder isn’t bad. Just let them win some matches and see where they can go from here.

We look at the 1-2-3 Kid stealing Razor Ramon’s money last week.

Here is Money Inc. for a chat, with Vince McMahon immediately mocking them for being the FORMER Tag Team Champions. IRS shrugs that off because they have a rematch clause in their contract against the Steiner Brothers. They move on to the idea of keeping your money, with Ted DiBiase mocking Razor Ramon for losing his cool, and as a result, his money, last week. Maybe Ramon can go to some stupid school like the University Of Michigan so Ramon can become the third Steiner Brother! And that’s how we’re setting up Ramon’s face turn.

Adam Bomb vs. PJ Walker

Johnny Polo is here with Bomb, who chokes Walker down to start. Naturally commentary ignores the match to talk about the bodyslam challenge, even as Bomb takes him to the floor for a hard clothesline. Back in and a top rope clothesline sets up the Atom Smasher for the pin at 2:14.

Crush vs. Bastion Booger

Heenan says Booger is related to Hilary Clinton as Crush can’t quite lift him up. Instead they go outside, with Crush not being able to ram him into the post. Booger can send him into the post though, and the steps as well. Back in and Booger grabs a bearhug but Crush powers out and manages a suplex. Some slams put Booger down, followed by a second and third for the pin at 5:37.

Rating: D+. Hey, did you know that Crush is strong and can lift large people? That was the entire point of the match and there wasn’t anything else going on, which made for a long five minutes. The match was as dull as you would expect and thankfully they did what they should have. It’s about as good as a Booger match is going to be, because, shockingly enough, he’s not very good.

Randy Savage is at Giants Stadium with a New York Giant who is ready to slam Yokozuna.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Commentary is hyped for the bodyslam challenge to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The idea of this show was focusing on the upcoming bodyslam challenge, with Crush being the big name who is going to come after him. That’s a fine enough idea, but then you realize that you’re getting ready for a bodyslam challenge rather than a match. It’s only going to change so much, and it makes for some rough time on the way there, which was on display this week.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 1, 1996
Location: Bob Carpenter Center, Newark, Delaware
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

It’s a new year and we have a special edition of the show, featuring the Raw Bowl. That means a football themed tag team elimination match, which should be at least interesting. Other than that, we are less than a month away from the Royal Rumble and Shawn Michaels might be on his way back from injury. Let’s get to it.

The opening video hypes up the Raw Bowl, complete with a marching band, cheerleaders, and Lawler in a Cleveland Browns jersey.

Smoking Gunns vs. Yokozuna/Owen Hart vs. Razor Ramon/Savio Vega vs. Sycho Sid/1-2-3 Kid

The Gunns’ Tag Team Titles aren’t on the line. This is an elimination match and the teams have a time out each. They all have jerseys with special numbers (Vega is Uno, the Kid is 1-2-3, Yokozuna is 641 etc) and the ring has a green mat. As a bonus, commentary is making every football reference they can think of because we have a theme going here. Bart and Hart start in three point stances, with Bart drop toeholding him down.

Billy comes in and, since they have to make contact with each other, Bart tries a hiptoss but Billy sticks the landing. The two of them tag in Hart and Yokozuna, the latter of whom drops him with a shoulder. Vega comes in to face Yokozuna and gets dropped as well, so it’s off to Vega vs. Kid. The running spinwheel kick gives Vega two and Ramon comes in to drop Hart with a right hand. The fast tags continue as Sid and Bart come in for a less than thrilling staredown.

Bart actually takes over and hits a suplex before handing it off to Vega. Hart enziguris Vega and Yokozuna comes in to hammer away as we take a break. We come back with Vega still in trouble as Sid comes in to stomp him down. Vega fights back on the Kid and brings in Ramon, but the Kid calls time out. Since we’ve never actually established what calling time out means, Ramon gives Kid the Razor’s Edge anyway.

Ted DiBiase gets on the apron and gets a flag as a result, which again doesn’t seem to have any meaning. Sid uses the distraction to deck Ramon and put Kid on top for the elimination at 13:25 (as the referee didn’t see Vega calling time out). We take another break and come back with Sid hammering on Bart before Hart gets to do the same. Hart misses a top rope splash though and it’s Billy coming in to clean house.

Everything breaks down and Yokozuna accidentally Banzai Drops Hart, giving Billy the pin at 21:04. Sid stomps away on Billy and Kid adds a running kick in the corner for two. Billy fights out of the chinlock but gets booted in the face. A small package gives Billy two on Sid and the comeback is on with some right hands. Sid cuts that off with a chokeslam (Lawler: “Intentional grounding!”) so Kid goes up, only for Ramon to come back and shove him off the top. Billy steals a rollup pin at 25:33.

Rating: C-. This is a good example of a match that might have been a unique concept but it wasn’t the best execution. At the end of the day, this was quite the mess with too many people running around and the football jokes getting old fast. It’s also not a good sign when one of the rules isn’t really explained, with the timeouts not making a ton of sense. The action was ok, but dang this was an idea that needed another draft.

We get a halftime show, with Michael Hayes saying this is a two minute drill. Jim Ross has a word from (not with) Diesel, who promises to beat up Mabel. Hayes talks about the Royal Rumble and runs down the card, again with the football metaphors.

From In Your House: Season’s Beatings.

Henry Godwinn vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

This is a Hog Pen Match, meaning the first to throw the other into a hog pen (with hogs) wins. Hillbilly Jim is the guest referee (that doesn’t seem fair) and Godwinn misses the early throw of the slop. Back in and Godwinn takes over, even tying Helmsley in the ropes for some slop to the face. Helmsley takes over and we take a break, coming back with Godwinn being whipped into the hog pen gate.

Helmsley is backdropped onto the edge of the pen but gets back down and drops Godwinn again. They head back to the ring where Godwinn charges into a boot in the corner. A wheelbarrow faceplant gets Godwinn out of trouble and he whips Helmsley over the corner. We take another break and come back with Godwinn hitting a Slop Drop up near the pen. Helmsley is right back with a backdrop into the pen for the win at 8:58 (the original time, which was heavily extended on this broadcast).

Rating: C-. Yeah do you get the concept here? This was supposed to be Godwinn’s specialty match, despite never seeing it before or after this time. At the end of the day though, this was all about who could backdrop the other one into the mud. The idea of seeing Helmsley get dirty was fun, but I’m going to need a bit more than that. Or a lot more really.

Post match Godwinn throws Helmsley into the pen as well, which can’t be good as Helmsley’s back is cut open.

Diesel vs. King Mabel

Diesel whips him into the ropes, hits a big boot, and gets the pin at 8 seconds. Better than Summerslam!

Post match Diesel Jackknifes Sir Mo and poses for his pyro. Diesel leaves with Miss Raw Bowl.

The Brooklyn Brawler gives the Smoking Gunns….the Lombardi Trophy. Ok that’s funny. The Gunns give him a Lipton ice tea bath.

We run down some Royal Rumble participants, including the debuting Vader.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

We wrap it up with Billionaire Ted’s Wrasslin War Room, with the Huckster and Nacho Man saying they can’t do any of these new moves. They can however, POSE!

Overall Rating: D+. Other than avoiding the threat of having to see another long Diesel vs. Mable match, this was a pretty bad week for Raw. The Royal Rumble is coming up and that should help a lot, but there is only so much that can be done when the feature match was a long football themed mess. They were trying something new here, but that doesn’t mean it was a good idea.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: April 24, 1995
Location: Omaha Civic Auditorium, Omaha, Nebraska
Attendance: 5,800
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

We’ll wrap up the month with a pretty big show, as Diesel is defending the WWF Title against Bam Bam Bigelow. The winner of that goes on to face Sid at In Your House in about three weeks, so there is already quite a bit on the line. The rest of the pay per view card could use some build of its own though and we might be seeing that come together this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We look at Bam Bam Bigelow’s recent issues, including losing at the Royal Rumble and Wrestlemania. Bigelow is going to do better, such as getting a WWF Title match tonight. That’s quite the punishment for a high profile loss.

Opening sequence.

Commentary welcomes us to the show and runs down the card.

Smoking Gunns vs. Barry Horowitz/Brooklyn Brawler

Billy works on Brawler’s arm to start and Bart comes in with a top rope ax handle. A double Russian legsweep lets Bart stay on the arm before a neckbreaker/belly to back suplex combination finishes for Billy at 2:16. Short and sweet.

Bam Bam Bigelow, with a very black eye, is ready to win the WWF Title for the Million Dollar Corporation.

Diesel is ready for Bigelow.

Bertha Faye vs. La Pantera Serena

Faye is the woman who attacked Alundra Blayze a few weeks ago. This time though she’s in bright rainbow colors and a skirt rather than all black for quite the downgrade. Faye kicks away to start and Serena can’t do much with the power. Serena comes back with some kicks but Faye sits down on her to block a sunset flip. A legdrop crushes Serena and a sitout powerbomb drops her again. Faye’s falling splash finishes at 3:54.

Rating: C-. And we’re done with Faye being someone who can be taken seriously. She came in as a monster a few weeks ago and felt different but here she’s little more than a comedy monster who does some good power stuff. The presentation makes a huge difference, but why go with someone serious when you can do something goofy?

The In Your House report runs down the card, which now features Razor Ramon/1-2-3 Kid vs. Jeff Jarrett/The Roadie and Bret Hart vs. Hakushi. And you can win a house!

Sid is ready for In Your House.

WWF Title: Diesel vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Bigelow, with Ted DiBiase, is challenging. Diesel actually wrestles him to the mat to start and Bigelow needs a breather on the floor. Back in and Diesel unloads on him in the corner before dropping a big elbow for two. A boot choke in the corner sets up an armbar but Bigelow slams his way out of trouble.

Diesel shrugs off a falling headbutt and hits a running clothesline so they can head outside. Bigelow posts him and hits a Samoan drop for two back inside. We take a break and come back with Diesel fighting out of a chinlock so they can collide for a double down. Diesel is up first to drop an elbow, setting up the running crotch attack against the ropes.

A snap suplex gives Diesel two and he grabs a neck crank. That’s broken up and Bigelow gets his own suplex into his own neck crank. Tatanka comes out to ringside as Diesel fights up, only to get stomped back down. We take another break and come back with Tatanka accidentally tripping Bigelow. A big boot and the Jackknife retain the title at 16:04.

Rating: C+. We’re pretty clearly on the way to a Bigelow face turn and that’s not the worst idea. He’s having the year of his life and it is easy to see why he is getting this kind of a chance. The fans are going to respond to someone who looks like that with that kind of movement and it’s why he was pushed this strong. Just do something with him and it could work.

Post match DiBiase and Tatanka get in the ring to yell at Bigelow. DiBiase can’t believe that Bigelow lost to a FOOTBALL PLAYER and now this. DiBiase slaps him and Tatanka jumps Bigelow from behind, only to get dropped. Bigelow quits the team so here is IRS to help with the beatdown. Sid (in blue for a weird look) comes in as well and a rather horrible powerbomb leaves Bigelow laying. Diesel runs in for the save.

Aldo Montoya vs. Black Phantom

Montoya hammers away to start and sends him to the floor for a slingshot dive. Back in and Montoya works on the arm but Phantom fights up. A middle rope crossbody puts Phantom down again and Montoya’s middle rope bulldog finishes at 2:45.

There’s a new star coming to the WWF. Some Connecticut blue blood.

We look at Diesel and Bam Bam Bigelow shaking hands during a commercial earlier tonight.

Overall Rating: C. Well, there was a big angle and that helped a bit, but the rest of the show was the run of the mill stuff we’ve seen around here forever. The show needs something interesting to spice it up and while the Bigelow turn was close, it was only so good. It’s going to take a long time for the company to get out of this rut and that’s making for some rough times.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: July 24, 1995
Location: Louisville Gardens, Louisville, Kentucky
Attendance: 4,181
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Vince McMahon

We’re done with In Your House II and Diesel is still the WWF Champion, having beaten Sid in a not so great lumberjack match. Shawn Michaels won the Intercontinental Title from Jeff Jarrett in a far better match. Other than that though, we are on the way to Summerslam and that might not go so well. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look back at Shawn Michaels winning the Intercontinental Title.

Opening sequence.

Shawn Michaels vs. Jimmy Del Ray

Non-title and Jim Cornette is here with Del Ray. Michaels starts fast by taking him down for an armbar but Del Ray is right back up. A springboard out of the corner doesn’t work for Del Ray as Michaels knocks him to the floor. Back in and Del Ray hits a quick DDT and takes over, including a boot rake to the eyes. Some hip gyrating sets up a (gyrating) neckbreaker for two on Michaels and we hit the chinlock. Del Ray misses a top rope splash and Michaels hits a running forearm. A superkick drops Tom Pritchard (who was apparently here too) and another finishes Del Ray at 5:19.

Rating: C+. Well, this was at least better than Michaels’ match against IRS last week, mainly just because it was shorter. Michaels is on a roll at this point and he shouldn’t be needing that much time to take out someone like Del Ray. Not a good match here, but less bad, and for this time period, I’ll take that.

Post match Michaels teases stripping, as he tends to do.

We look at Jeff Jarrett’s live singing debut, but there are accusations that it was NOT REALLY HIM. And yes, you’re supposed to be interested by this.

We look at Shawn Michaels beating Jarrett again.

We recap Bret Hart vs. Hakushi, who had some great matches.

Smoking Gunns vs. John Faulkner/Rick Stockhauser

The jobbers have matching tights so they might be a regular team. Faulkner’s headlock doesn’t last long on Billy but it’s off to Stockhauser for an elbow. Billy fights out of trouble with ease and Bart comes in for the left hands. The Sidewinder finishes in a hurry at 2:01.

Merchandise shill….for Jeff Jarrett gear.

Goldust is coming.

Fatu wants to make a difference in his hometown of San Francisco.

Waylon Mercy vs. Gary Scott

Mercy hammers him down at the bell to start and chokes away. A hard whip into the corner has Scott in more trouble and the sleeper finishes for Mercy at 2:02.

We go to the Summerslam Control Center, which turns into a recap of In Your House. Ah the days of pay per view replays. King Mabel is ready to come for Diesel next, because we have to see some horrible things from time to time.

Bret Hart vs. Hakushi

Hakushi has Shinja with him. We get a little weird before the match as Hakushi pulls out a Hart mannequin head. Uh, right. Hart goes after Shinja to start so Hakushi jumps him from behind. Back in and Hakushi’s Vader Bomb hits knees, allowing Hart to hammer away. The backbreaker connects and Hart slugs at the ribs. A whip into the corner is reversed and Hart goes back first into the post as we take a break.

We come back with Hakushi hitting a nasty kick to the face, followed by a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. A top rope headbutt to the back gets two and we’re off to the nerve hold. That’s broken up and Hakushi rolls him to the floor and we take another break. Back with Hakushi connecting with a Asai moonsault but Hart is right back up. They get back in for a backbreaker into a middle rope elbow, followed by the bulldog for two on Hakushi. Hart gets knocked down again but he avoids a top rope headbutt. The superplex into the Sharpshooter makes Hakushi give up at 16:24.

Rating: B. Match of the month on the show so far, which really shouldn’t be a surprise. They’ve been in the ring before and worked well together so it makes sense to give them a rematch. Hart can work well with anyone and Hakushi was ready to hang in there with him. Yes I’m as shocked as you are that Hart stole the show, as he was doing it time after time in this era.

Post match Hart beats up Shinja for a bonus. Cue Jean-Pierre Lafitte to steal the bag from before the match.

Dean Douglas has the Report Card, where he talks about the importance of knowledge. This was bad, but what else were you expecting?

Jerry Lawler yells at Shawn Michaels and doesn’t see much in his future. Michaels isn’t impressed to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. The main event helped carry things here, but you could only expect so much when the focus was on Hart and Michaels. There are only so many talented stars on the roster at this point and this focused on two of the really good ones. They rest of the show was the usual collection of squashes, but Hart vs. Hakushi is worth a look.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 16, 1996
Location: Wheeling Civic Center, Wheeling, West Virginia
Attendance: 4,903
Commentators: Kevin Kelly, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the last Raw before Mind Games and the big story is of course Mankind challenging Shawn Michaels for the WWF Title. Other than that, Goldust and the Undertaker are having a Final Curtain match, which doesn’t sound overly interesting. Finally there’s the Intercontinental Title tournament, which is only so special in the first place. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at the tournament, with the semifinals tonight. Plus Razor Ramon, Diesel and Bret Hart might be returning.

Opening sequence.

Jake Roberts chases Jerry Lawler off commentary to start really fast.

Jake Roberts vs. The Sultan

This is Sultan’s debut and he has Bob Backlund and Iron Sheik with him. Backlund sits in on commentary and praises Sultan and Sheik but doesn’t want to be bothered tonight. Sultan hammers away in the corner and the threat of a DDT is quickly escaped. Roberts keeps glaring at Lawler though, leaving Lawler to suggest Roberts is drunk. Lawler offers another distraction though and Sultan gets the camel clutch for the win at 3:05.

Rating: D+. The Roberts vs. Lawler feud is pretty horrible to say the least and that’s not just due to the pretty horrible subject matter. At the same time, you have the Sultan, who would have felt dated fifteen years before this, coming in and having a dull match. As usual, it doesn’t help to see someone’s debut lose its focus to another feud, which should tell you what to expect from the Sultan.

Post match Backlund is in a bit of a trance at the sight of the camel clutch.

Owen Hart, Brian Pillman, and now Steve Austin are looking forward to Bret Hart’s return at Mind Games. Jim Ross thinks something is afoot.

Bob Holly/Alex Porteau vs. Smoking Gunns

Non-title and Sunny is here with the Gunns. Billy gets knocked outside to start as Camp Cornette comes out to watch. Bart cuts off Porteau with a raised boot in the corner as commentary, again, talks about everything they can think of outside of the match. Bart knocks Porteau down again but pulls him up at two before handing it back to Billy. Camp Cornette’s distraction lets Porteau get a small package for two and it’s back to Holly to clean house. That’s cut off and the Sidewinder connects but Camp Cornette offers a distraction. Holly rolls Billy up for the fluke pin at 5:47.

Rating: C. This was more about advancing Camp Cornette vs. the Gunns and that’s not a terrible idea. I’m not sure which of the two I’m supposed to cheer for, but Holly and Porteau stealing a fluke win is a good way to give the title feud some more steam. It’s not like Holly and Porteau are going to mean anything, but I’ll take this for a little change of pace.

WWF President Gorilla Monsoon makes it clear that Kevin Nash and Scott Hall will NOT be here next week because they are under contract to another company. That sounds like covering themselves from a potential lawsuit.

Here is Jim Cornette, with Vader, for a public workout before hit match against Jose Lothario. Vader has been coaching him recently so he has wrestler Tony Williams here for an exhibition. Cornette does some basic stuff but Williams keeps reversing them and even works on the leg. That’s enough for Cornette to send Vader after him and Williams gets tied up in the ropes for yelling and slapping. You knew what this was going to be.

Intercontinental Title Tournament Semifinals: Owen Hart vs. Marc Mero

Sable is here with Mero and Pat Patterson (who will be refereeing the finals) is on commentary. Patterson also confirms that Razor Ramon and Diesel will be here next week. Mero starts in on the arm and gets Hart down into an armbar. That works so well that Mero does it again but Hart fights out and hits a spinwheel kick. The chinlock keeps Mero down as Gorilla Monsoon pops in to again say that Jim Ross is wrong and that Kevin Nash and Scott Hall will NOT be here next week. Ross insists that he’s right and that Razor Ramon and Diesel (note the difference) will be here next week.

Hart knocks him down again and we hit another chinlock. This time Mero suplexes his way to freedom but Hart knocks him outside. Ross goes on a rant about how Hart’s wrist is fine and the cast he has been wearing is completely unnecessary as we take a break. We come back with Mero fighting back, including sending Hart outside for a running flip dive. Back up and they collide so Hart takes the cast off to knock Mero silly…for two. Hart argues with the referee, allowing Mero to get in a cast shot of his own for the pin at 9:26.

Rating: C+. The match was what you would have expected from these two and Mero gets a win (albeit a screwy one, with the referee again somehow not seeing the obvious shot), but the commentary brought it back down. This stuff with Ross about Ramon and Diesel is killing the show, as not only is it not that interesting, but Ross’ rants are derailing everything going on. Just shut up about it already and save that nonsense for in between the matches, because otherwise it’s one heck of a distraction.

We look at the recent tour of South Africa. During the tour, Bret Hart wrestled what might have been his final match and he calls Brian Pillman and Owen Hart liars because he has not agreed to be at Mind Games. He isn’t sure about his future in the WWF and he hasn’t made up his mind yet.

Intercontinental Title Tournament Semifinals: Sycho Sid vs. Faarooq

Sunny is here with Faarooq, who actually knocks Sid down to start. A powerslam does it again but Sid is right back up with a knockdown of his own. Faarooq gets a belly to back suplex for two and we go to a split screen to hear Ahmed Johnson swear revenge when he gets back. The chinlock goes on as Jim Ross is STILL going on about Razor Ramon and Diesel being here next week.

Faarooq goes up but dives into a powerslam for two, leaving both of them down. Faarooq misses a sitdown splash to the back and we take a break. We come back with Sid slipping out of the Dominator and hitting a chokeslam. That’s enough for Sunny to get on the apron for a distraction, allowing Faarooq to chair Sid down for two. Sid gets up and chairs Faarooq in the back so hard that he knocks him four feet across the ring (by that I mean there was a REALLY obvious edit and yeah apparently this was filmed twice) for the DQ at 10:29.

Rating: D+. There’s only so much you can get out of these two and that was fairly obvious coming in. Faarooq gets to go on to the finals, where he kind of had to be for the sake of the story, and Sid gets an out without losing before he goes into the main event scene in a few more weeks. Not a good match, but it was all they could have done.

Undertaker swears vengeance on Goldust but it’s just a stop on the way to Mankind and Paul Bearer.

We run down the Mind Games card.

Mankind and Paul Bearer are ready for Shawn Michaels. That will make Mankind the new sexy boy and women will want to rub his ear!

Overall Rating: D+. The tournament stuff is dull enough, but the bigger issue here is this Razor Ramon/Diesel nonsense, as it’s dragging down everything around it. Ross as a heel isn’t something that adds any positives to the show, especially when you already have Lawler as a heel commentator. As bad as it already is though, it’s only going to get worse.

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Summerslam 1996
Date: August 18, 1996
Location: Gund Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Attendance: 17,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jim Ross, Mr. Perfect

This is not the best time for the WWF as the company has been dealing with the NWO for the last month and a half. Shawn Michaels is doing as much as he can and is doing it again here as he defends the WWF Title against Vader in the main event. Other than that though, we have a Boiler Room Brawl between the Undertaker and Mankind. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Steve Austin vs. Yokozuna

We’ll throw in a bonus here for a somewhat infamous match. Austin hammers away to start and gets knocked down without much trouble. A Samoan drop and legdrop put Austin down and the Banzai Drop is loaded up….but the ropes break and Yokozuna falls down, allowing Austin to get the fast pin at 1:53. Well that got the point across. Vince: “HE IS SO HEAVY!” Yeah that.

The opening video looks at the two main events, which is about fighting the monsters of Mankind and Vader. Makes sense.

Commentary previews the show and a fan actually comes up asking Perfect for an autograph, which he shoves off without saying a word. Even Vince seems to glare at the guy a bit.

Savio Vega vs. Owen Hart

Hart has a cast on his left wrist, with Vince and JR questioning how slowly it has healed. Feeling out process to start with neither getting very far, though the referee does threaten Hart for using the cast. Vega leapfrogs him and sends the cast into various buckles, followed by an armbar.

We cut to the back where Jim Cornette (Hart’s manager) is helping Vader warm up as Vega stays on the arm. There are some fans loudly chanting for Owen, though Vega taking him down by the arm quiets them down a bit. Hart gets up and manages to send him shoulder first into the corner, allowing the stomping to ensue. Vega gets caught in an armbar for a change before Hart switches into an armbar from a different angle for a change of pace. A bite to the leg of all things gets Vega out so Hart ties the arm up in the ropes and slaps him in the face.

Cue Clarence Mason (Jim Cornette’s lawyer) to watch as Vega misses a spinwheel kick but hits a crossbody for two. Back up and Hart’s enziguri connects as Mason is playing cheerleader. Hart’s rollup with feet on the ropes gets two, as does Vega’s rollup. Vega gets up a spinning kick to the face in the corner and a legdrop gets two.

Hart is right back with a kick of his own, followed by a missile dropkick for two of his own. It’s time to go up again but this time Hart gets crotched, setting up a belly to back superplex. Vega seems to land on the cast though, allowing Hart to take it off and knock Vega cold. Somehow the referee didn’t see it, despite it being right in front of his face, and the Sharpshooter goes on to give Hart the win at 13:25.

Rating: C+. Fine enough opener as Hart is always worth a look, though Vega was reaching the end of his usefulness by this point. There’s nothing wrong with having two faster paced guys getting out there to start the show, though trimming a few minutes off here wouldn’t have hurt either. The cast shot at the end didn’t do it any favors either, as there was no reason to believe the referee didn’t see it.

Post match here is Justin Hawk Bradshaw to yell about Vega, who Bradshaw wants to send back to “that island”. Bradshaw gets in a cheap shot on Vega in the aisle to leave him laying again.

Todd Pettingill is scared of being in the boiler room, where he runs into Mankind, who insists that there is no place like home. Undertaker can come in, but beware that he will be seeing a fate worse than death. Mankind licks a pipe.

Tag Team Titles: New Rockers vs. Smoking Gunns vs. Godwinns vs. Bodydonnas

The Gunns, with Sunny, are defending with elimination rules. Skip (of the Bodydonnas) has a neck brace due to a fractured vertebrae. Meanwhile, the Godwinns have Hillbilly Jim, a pig and a basset hound, because Vince McMahon had a thing for hillbillies. Billy and Henry start things off with Henry running him over with a shoulder. A clothesline does it as well and Phineas comes in to throw Zip around.

Billy wants the people to sit down and shut up…so Phineas and Zip tag in both Gunns. Sunny panics as commentary talks about how they have to make contact. This is then proven wrong as Bart tags out to Zip without any issue. Zip takes over on Billy but Jannetty trips Zip down for the pin at 4:03 (likely due to Skip’s injury).

It’s back to Henry to work on Billy’s arm but Cassidy (Al Snow) gets in a cheap shot from the apron to cut Henry down. This means a Partridge Family reference, because the New Rockers are big into that 60s music scene. The Rockers and Gunns start double teamming the Godwinns until some heel miscommunication breaks that down. The Godwinns are fine with going after both of them and we get some double noggin knockers. A quick Slop Drop gets rid of the Rockers at 7:21 and we’re down to two.

Bart hammers on Henry, who is back with a heck of a clothesline to leave both of them down. It’s too far for the tag though and Billy comes in to yell a lot, much to Sunny’s appreciation. Henry gets back with an atomic drop and a World’s Strongest Slam, which is enough for the tag back to Phineas. Everything breaks down and Henry Cactus Clotheslines Bart out to the floor. Phineas hits the Slop Drop on Billy but Bart comes off the top with an ax handle, allowing Billy to steal the pin at 12:21.

Rating: D+. The word that comes to mind here is lifeless. This was a bunch of people going out there and doing their moves to each other until one of them got the win. It wasn’t exciting, it wasn’t interesting and the fans didn’t seem to care. The tag division was such a dead zone around this time and this was a perfect example of why. There was just nothing here and it showed very, very badly.

Post match Sunny brags about the Gunns and unveils a huge poster of herself, her favorite subject.

We look at the WWF taking over Cleveland in recent days. This involves a train racing a carriage to show the fastest way to the arena. Believe it or not, the train wins. Then Jerry Lawler went to a Cleveland Indians practice and tried to learn the spitball. One of the players offered to teach him in exchange for a piledriver. Some wrestlers also helped paint over some graffiti in a nice moment. To top it off, Undertaker and Paul Bearer gave away…a funeral?

British Bulldog vs. Sycho Sid

No Cornette for Bulldog either but Mason is here again. In the back, Sid is glad the fans seem to like him since he came back and is ready to fight. As usual, Sid has the weirdest charisma and it carried him so far. Sid starts fairly fast with a slam to send Bulldog outside, leaving the fans to give us a LET’S GO SID chant. Back in and Sid grabs a headlock but Bulldog fights out and hits the rather impressive delayed vertical suplex.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before Cornette clotheslines him to the floor. Cornette is at least watching the match in the back as Vader warms up (he’s been at it for forty minutes now) and Bulldog drapes him ribs first over the top. The chinlock goes on again but Sid is up rather quickly. A charge misses in the corner though and Bulldog nails the running powerslam. Cue Cornette to yell at Mason though and the distraction means no cover. Another powerslam is loaded up but Sid escapes and hits the chokeslam. The powerbomb gives Sid the pin at 6:26.

Rating: C. Sid was always good for an acceptable enough power match and that’s about what we got here. The bigger deal is between Cornette and Mason, which is about as interesting as you would imagine. That’s a big part of why the company was losing to WCW and it would get even worse: yes WCW had the NWO, but look at what the WWF was using to counter. This was fine, but it’s not like it was anything that you would remember in an hour or so.

Goldust vs. Marc Mero

Goldust has Marlena with him but has an eye for Sable, who is here with Mero. Before the match, Mero talks about not liking the attention Mankind has been giving Sable and promises to make Goldust a falling star. Goldust does his crawling thing to start but Mero isn’t having any of that and knocks him into the corner. A drop toehold into an armbar has Goldust in trouble and Marlena doesn’t seem to care in the slightest.

Commentary talks about Ahmed Johnson’s (latest) injury as Mero works on the arm even more. Goldust fights back and knocks him to the apron, followed by into the barricade in a variety of ways. Cue Mankind to call Sable “Mommy”, get fairly close to her, and then leave. Goldust’s chinlock and clothesline get two but Mero fights up and makes the comeback.

An atomic drop and left hands rock Goldust and Mero leverages him outside. Back in and a slingshot legdrop sets up the debuting Wild Thing (shooting star press)…but Marlena has the referee. The delay lets Goldust kick out, which is amazingly stupid given how they just debuted that kind of a move. A powerslam gives Mero two more but Goldust is back with a quick Curtain Call for the win at 11:01.

Rating: C+. This could have been a lot worse, but the kickout of the Wild Thing was ridiculous. Again: if they want someone or something to get over, stop having it be used in the middle of a match to next to no impact. If you want Goldust to win then fine, but don’t cut the legs off of Mero’s awesome new move in the process. That doesn’t help him at all and the result could have been the same without that boneheaded decision.

Post match Goldust goes after Sable but Mero makes the save.

We look at Intercontinental Champion Ahmed Johnson winning a battle royal to earn a title shot the night after Summerslam on Raw but he was already hurt and then got in a fight with Faarooq. He had a ruptured kidney and as a result, his title is vacant. His future isn’t clear, but he’ll be out for a few months at least. There will be a tournament for the Intercontinental Title and a four man battle royal, consisting of the final four eliminated from the original battle royal, for the title shot. Johnson would return to the ring but he never really recovered.

Here are Sunny and Faarooq, still in the blue gladiator period, for a chat. Faarooq does not like the idea of a tournament because he should be handed the title. Sunny can live with it and promises that Faarooq will win the tournament, because what Sunny wants, she gets. There was no need for this to be on pay per view.

We recap Jake Roberts vs. Jerry Lawler. Roberts was trying to reform his drinking and is now a Christian, with Lawler mocking him endlessly and even pouring alcohol down his throat. Therefore, things are personal.

Jerry Lawler vs. Jake Roberts

Newcomer Mark Henry is on commentary and Lawler brings out a bag of his own, ala the one Roberts tends to bring. Lawler reveals a Baltimore Ravens jersey and pennant (the Cleveland Browns left for Baltimore and became the Ravens, which did not sit well with Cleveland fans). He talks about throwing out the first pitch at the Indians game and the team’s manager begging him to sign a contract.

The Ravens’ owners are here too so don’t ask them for an autograph! Lawler goes for the bag and pulls out Roberts’ partners: Jim Beam! He mocks Roberts’ wife and calls out Henry’s lack of Olympic medals. Not that it matters as he would just get his gold medal bronzed. Henry just sits and takes this, as he doesn’t quite get the thinking yet.

Lawler keeps going with his routine until Roberts finally comes out to cut him off. Hold on though as Lawler offers what he has in his bag in exchange for Roberts NOT taking out what he has in his own bag. Lawler offers a huge bottle of booze, which is enough to bring out the big yellow snake to wrap around Lawler and get us going. Lawler heads to the floor and wants the microphone again but Roberts pulls him back inside to start up the beating.

A slam on the floor plants Lawler again and Roberts mocks him over the booze. Back in and Lawler gets in a cheap shot, allowing him to tie Roberts in the ropes. It’s time to get one of the bottles, but Roberts gets out and hits the short arm clothesline. The referee yells at Roberts though and Lawler hits him in the throat with a bottle, allowing him to pull the tights for the pin at 4:09.

Rating: D. Ignoring the fairly off putting subject matter, the match was hardly anything worth seeing either. The ending felt like the same thing as the opener, as again it was hard to believe that the referee didn’t see it. On top of that you had Henry, who had no business being on commentary with that lack of talking ability. How was that not noticed before the match? Just have him come out and do something after if you want to showcase him, but don’t focus on his weaknesses like that.

Post match Roberts points at his throat so Lawler pours Jim Beam down his throat (rumored to have been real whiskey as a rib). Mark Henry makes the save after an all time nothing performance on commentary.

Bob Backlund is in the crowd doing….Bob Backlund things (he’s a weird guy).

We recap Undertaker vs. Mankind. Undertaker was used to facing monsters but the more you beat on Mankind, the more he came back, making him a weird opponent. They’re still fighting though and this time it’s going to be a brawl in the boiler room, also known as a Boiler Room Brawl.

Undertaker vs. Mankind

Boiler Room Brawl, meaning they start in the boiler room and the winner is the first to get to the ring and retrieve the urn from Paul Bearer. Undertaker slowly walks into the boiler room and even he looks a bit nervous. This leads to some slow walking around, as Undertaker isn’t sure where he is, giving us almost a slasher movie feel.

Mankind finally sneaks up on him with what looks like a board for a bit shot to the back. A trashcan lid (or something that looks like one) to the head gets Mankind off of him and Undertaker sends him into a metal locker. Mankind is back up to send him throat first into a saw horse and they brawl around a bit more. We get some “technical difficulties”, which is likely code for “an edit” as this half was taped in advance.

Undertaker is sent into a machine but comes back with a pipe to knock a trashcan out of Mankind’s hands. Mankind turns a valve to spray Undertaker with hot steam and they stagger around some more. Undertaker grabs a wooden pallet but Undertaker hits him low with a pipe to cut him off again. A ram into a steel wall drops Undertaker again, allowing Mankind to punch him in the face.

With Undertaker down, Mankind climbs a ladder and drops an elbow onto Undertaker and concrete because he’s kind of insane. Mankind starts going for the door but Undertaker pulls him down and we get more technical difficulties. We come back with Undertaker down on the floor and Mankind climbing a ladder. Undertaker sits up and grabs the ladder, sending Mankind crashing down onto a box (which almost went VERY wrong and could have ended his career).

They fight up towards the door and slug it out until Undertaker blasts him with a fire extinguisher. Undertaker gets out the door but gets pulled back in, with Mankind getting out and slamming the door on him. Mankind manages to get away and close a door, stacking a bunch of stuff in front of it. That’s fine with Undertaker, who breaks the door down and follows Mankind down a hall (where other wrestlers are cheering them on, with even Steve Austin getting a look).

Mankind throws coffee on him and then crawls through the entrance to come into the arena for the first time. Undertaker follows him and they make it to ringside, where WWE has brought in TV’s on carts like we’re in English class in the 90s. I mean we were in the 90s here but not so much with the English class thing. Anyway, Mankind hits a Texas piledriver on the exposed concrete.

That’s not enough to stop Undertaker of course and he pulls Mankind back down and goes inside….but Bearer won’t give him the urn. Instead Mankind comes back in and puts on the Mandible Claw as Bearer starts shining the urn. Bearer slaps and stomps at Undertaker (JR is INCENSED), who tries to crawl over to him. A huge urn shot to the head (CRACK) knocks Undertaker silly and Mankind gets the urn to win at 26:45.

Rating: B. Well it was different and rather violent, which is all you can ask for out something like this. I can definitely get the appeal of this kind of match between two people with their history, but it was so different than anything else that either company was doing. The brawl itself was good, but this was all about Bearer turning on Undertaker, as that was one of the biggest partnerships of the 90s. It was a new world for Undertaker, and that is something he had been needing for a long, long time.

Post match Mankind and Bearer leave so the druids come out and carry Undertaker away. Do they just follow Undertaker around in case he gets beaten up?

Jim Cornette says Vader has proven he can beat Shawn Michaels and tonight, Michaels is going to grabbed by the throat, making him sound like an electric kazoo in a Peter Frampton song. If you need a bizarre reference, go to Cornette.

WWF Title: Vader vs. Shawn Michaels

Michaels, with Jose Lothario, is defending and Jim Cornette is here with Vader. Michaels tries to move around to start so Vader hits him in the ribs and drops him with a hard clothesline. A big boot is blocked though and Michaels sweeps the leg, setting up a basement dropkick. Some kicks to the face rock Vader and Michaels low bridges him out to the floor. A baseball slide drops Vader again and Michaels hits a big dive, giving us an image which went on a lot of highlight reels.

Back in and a top rope ax handle sets up a hurricanrana to put Vader down again. Something like a victory roll sends Vader outside again but the slingshot hurricanrana is countered with a nasty powerbomb onto the floor. Vader throws him back inside for a hard suplex as Michaels is in a lot of trouble. The slow beating continues and a rather big backdrop stays on the back.

The beating is so intense that it has Perfect changing his mind about returning to the ring. Vader drops him again with a hard clothesline before grabbing a head and arm choke. That’s broken up so Vader tries to sit on him, only to be cut off with a low blow. Michaels knocks him down and goes up but has to pull out of the top rope elbow as Vader didn’t move as planned. This sends Michaels into an infamous rant about how Vader screwed up, because Michaels in 1996 would have that kind of tantrum on live television.

Back up and Michaels crossbodies him out to the floor, where Vader gorilla presses him onto the barricade. That’s enough for a countout at 13:53, but Cornette says no way, because Michaels isn’t getting out of it that easy.

Michaels seems to agree so Vader goes after him, with Lothario getting between them. That lets Cornette get in a tennis racket shot and they get back inside, where a belly to belly gives Vader two. Michaels manages the flying forearm though and tries the superkick but Cornette grabs his foot. Cornette throws the tennis racket inside so Michaels takes it away and unloads on Vader (with some great sound effects for the DQ at 17:50.

Hold on though as Cornette says Michaels got disqualified on purpose so let’s keep this going and have a real winner. We keep it going with Michaels grabbing a sunset flip but having to avoid a sitdown splash. Now the top rope elbow can connect and the superkick gives Michaels two. The referee gets bumped so Vader’s powerbomb only gets a delayed two. The Vader Bomb is loaded up but Cornette wants the moonsault. That’s enough for Michaels to hit a moonsault press for the win at 22:19.

Rating: B. I liked the story they were telling here with the idea that Vader was overwhelming Michaels but kept giving him chance after chance to escape. That’s the idea of Michaels just finding a way to escape and eventually survive Vader when he went too far. That being said, the tantrum in the middle is just dumb and makes Michaels look pathetic, which he did so often by himself. Otherwise, good main event.

Also of note, this was originally going to be Vader winning the title and ultimately losing it back to Michaels at the Royal Rumble, but Michaels didn’t want to work with Vader so Sid got the spot instead (hence the December In Your House being called “It’s Time” when Vader had nothing to do with the main event.).

Overall Rating: C+. The two main events carry the show as far as it is going to go. The rest of the show ranges from forgettable to bad, which sums up so much of this time for the WWF. They had some talent around, but it was going to take time before the new generation could take the ball. Granted getting Bret Hart back in a few months would help, but this was not a good time for the company, save for the top of the card. You could certainly see that in this show and not in a good way whatsoever.

Ratings Comparison

Steve Austin vs. Yokozuna

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2025 Redo: N/A

Owen Hart vs. Savio Vega

Original: B+
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C+

Smoking Gunns vs. Bodydonnas vs. New Rockers vs. Godwinns

Original: B-
2013 Redo: D-
2025 Redo: D+

British Bulldog vs. Sycho Sid

Original: D
2013 Redo: D+
2025 Redo: C

Marc Mero vs. Goldust

Original: C+
2013 Redo: D
2025 Redo: C+

Jerry Lawler vs. Jake Roberts

Original: C-
2013 Redo: D
2025 Redo: D

Mankind vs. Undertaker

Original: A-
2013 Redo: B
2025 Redo: B

Vader vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A-
2013 Redo: B+
2025 Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: A
2013 Redo: C
2025 Redo: C+

The other two reviews are a bit all over the place, but that original is as rose colored glasses nostalgia as you can get. My goodness that’s nuts.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 26, 1993
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 1,200
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, Bobby Heenan

It’s time to start putting together the Summerslam card as Lex Luger continues his quest for a WWF Title shot. He doesn’t actually have it yet but maybe he can get there by doing….bus things. Other than that, we have a rematch from the King Of The Ring finals as Bret Hart meets Bam Bam Bigelow. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Doink the Clown is NOT happy with Randy Savage costing him a match so if the Macho Boy ever does it again, it won’t go well. If he’s a good Macho Boy though, Doink might have a surprise for him.

Opening sequence.

Commentary previews the show, with Stu and Helen Hart in the balcony for Bret’s match.

Bret Hart vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Luna Vachon is here with Bigelow, who knocks him down fast to start and hammers away. Hart slides between the legs though and slugs away before knocking him out to the floor. Back in and Hart hits a top rope…something but comes up holding his knee. Bigelow stomps away and we take an early break.

We come back with Hart on the floor and holding his knee so Bigelow whips him hard into the corner. Some mockery makes it even worse and a World’s Strongest Slam gives Bigelow two. Hart avoids another shot and hits a belly to back suplex before slugging away. Bigelow hits a dropkick to the ribs of all things and we hit the rather large chinlock. We take another break and come back with Hart fighting out of the chinlock.

Another dropkick is avoided though and Hart manages a backdrop. A middle rope clothesline gives Hart two and he jumps on Bigelow’s back with a sleeper. With nothing else working, Bigelow just launches him head first into the buckle for the escape. Hart knocks him down again and tries the Sharpshooter…but Jerry Lawler is in the balcony with Stu and Helen Hart.

Lawler says they have more tragedies than Shakespeare as Bigelow rams Hart into the post. Stu argues back with Lawler and it goes about as well as you would expect. Helen tells him to wrestle and keep his mouth closed as Bigelow keeps hammering away. Bigelow misses a Swanton of all things and Hart slugs away, which is enough for him to go after Lawler for the countout at 17:02.

Rating: B-. It’s not quite as good as the match at the King Of The Ring but then again that’s not the point here. This was about advancing Hart’s issues with Lawler and having him go after Hart’s parents is going to do that rather well. Hart can always work well with a monster and Bigelow is more than good enough so the match worked well as a result.

Post match Hart gets to his parents but Lawler is long gone.

Summerslam Report! Lex Luger is officially getting the WWF Title shot, though he has to wear an elbow pad. Gene Okerlund thinks Jerry Lawler is a complete jerk, but he also wants to see the Rest In Peace match between Undertaker and Giant Gonzalez. What is a Rest In Peace match? Only Undertaker knows. Also, hasn’t Undertaker been feuding with Mr. Hughes? So why is he facing Gonzalez? Normally I would say would Gonzalez be that much worse than Hughes…..but yeah, yeah he would be.

Mr. Hughes vs. Ross Greenberg

Hughes hammers away to start as commentary talks about the Undertaker, with McMahon asking how a match between Undertaker and Hughes would go. Then he plugs the Undertaker vs. Giant Gonzalez match. 1993 was weird. Hughes hits a powerbomb and sends him into the buckle a few times. A Boss Man Slam finishes Greenberg at 3:05.

Rating: C-. Commentary summed up the problem here perfectly: why in the world should I care about Hughes if Gonzalez is getting the big match with Undertaker? It makes Hughes feel like a filler (which, granted, he was) and that’s not the best way to go. Then again, it is better than having Gonzalez out there week after week.

Post match Hughes rips up another black wreath from the Undertaker and Heenan makes a rather inappropriate joke about Bill Clinton.

Wrestlemania: The Album is being released so there was a party with some wrestlers present.

Smoking Gunns vs. Duane Gill/Glen Ruth

Billy takes Gill down without much effort to start and it’s off to Bart to work on the arm. Ruth comes in and gets taken down by a crossbody. A powerslam into an elbow drop sets up a double Russian legsweep. Billy adds a dropkick and a clothesline as the Gunns keeps making the quick tags. Commentary talks about Lex Luger long enough until McMahon decides to focus on the match. A backdrop into a piledriver finishes Ruth at 4:23.

Rating: C. The Gunns were a team who felt like the next big thing, which is pretty much exactly what they were. They had an easily identifiable gimmick and they worked well together, but as usual in this time period, there was no competition for them and it took away what they could do. Total squash here, and I’m not sure on that finisher.

Ludwig Borga doesn’t like America.

Lex Luger was here earlier today and talks about how happy he is to have his WWF Title shot at Summerslam. He’s fine with wearing the elbow pad and wants to do nothing more than answer questions and meet fans on the way to the match.

We look at some fans who have joined the Lex train.

Doink The Clown vs. Phil Apollo

Doink wrestles him down without much trouble to start and ties Apollo up on the mat. Savage says Doink is boring, with natural promoter Vince McMahon running in to defend Doink, which is rather weird to hear. The Whoopee Cushion finishes Apollo at 2:32.  Apollo would be better off when he he became…Doink.

Post match Doink talks to the Macho Boy, and comes to the floor to talk to him face to face. Doink challenges Savage to face him next week and promises Triple Vision, with two more Doinks appearing in the arena. Savage is down with the match and promises a little surprise for next week. Oh dear.

We wrap it up with the Wrestlemania Rap and…yeah I still love it.

Overall Rating: C+. As usual, Hart carries things around this time and he has a new foe in Lawler to work with, so things should go well. Other than that, you have Luger continuing his bus stuff and…it’s Lex Luger riding around the country on a bus. What am I supposed to get out of that? The Hart match is the only good thing here but luckily it takes up a bunch of time so things could be a lot worse.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam 1995
Date: August 27, 1995
Location: Pittsburgh Civic Center, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 18,062
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Vince McMahon

So it’s time for the annual redos and for some reason, my readers decided to have me watch one of the worst Summerslams of all time. I’m so thrilled. Anyway this is built around Diesel vs. King Mabel in one of those moments where Vince McMahon was considered completely insane. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about the big matches tonight, including Diesel vs. Mabel, Jerry Lawler sending his evil dentist (that will never sound normal) against Bret Hart, Kama Mustafa vs. Undertaker (over the again stolen urn) and the sequel to the ladder match (which was added because the company knew they were dead in the water otherwise).

I still love the big flying blimp in the arena. The fans behind it must be so thrilled. Now am I being sarcastic on that one?

Dean Douglas, the annoying teacher, is in the back to critique all of the matches. I’m not a Shane fan, but to go from the Franchise to this is a shame.

1-2-3 Kid vs. Hakushi

Vince: “The Kid is ready for WWF action!” You mean this isn’t the Boggle tournament? Hakushi’s White Angel look is way too awesome for a show like this. Kid grabs a headlock to start but gets taken down by the hair, with a fan opposite the hard camera being VERY upset by the cheating. A trip takes Hakushi down but he kicks Kid away, giving us a double nipup.

Back up and they both miss spinning kicks for another early standoff. Hakushi finally sends him into the corner for the handspring elbow and the fans aren’t sure what to think of it (fair enough as he’s a heel, but an awesome heel). The Bronco Buster hits Kid (so that’s where he got it) and it’s time to kick at his leg. The chinlock doesn’t last long so Hakushi sends him outside and hits a cartwheel into a backdrop over the top for your YOU DO KNOW IT’S 1995 spot.

Back in and a top rope headbutt to the standing Kid gets two but a top rope splash misses. Kid dropkicks him to the floor and hits his own dive, followed by a slingshot legdrop for two. Kid’s top rope splash connects for the patented 1-2-He Got Him NO! Back up and Kid tries a spinwheel kick but gets caught in something like a belly to back suplex to give Hakushi the pin at 9:28.

Rating: B-. This was WAY ahead of its time with stuff like the Space Flying Tiger Drop of all things being far more than you would expect from a WWF match in 1995. The Kid was very good as well and fought from underneath with his own high flying. Good stuff here, though I’m worried about what else they have for the rest of the night.

Dok Hendrix is WAY too excited to know about Mabel’s master plan. You’ll just have to wait, exactly like Big Daddy Fool. And that’s before he even gets in the ring people.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Bob Holly

Helmsley is brand new here and still an undefeated blue blood. There’s no contact for the first minute so Holly grabs him for a slam and an armdrag sends Helmsley into the corner. Holly charges at him though and gets caught in a Stun Gun to let Helmsley take over. Vince talks about wanting to see Lawler in a go kart or bumper cars as Holly gets whipped hard into the corner.

The chinlock goes on and we cut to British Bulldog arriving, even though he has nothing to say. Back in and arena and Holly’s abdominal stretch is countered with a hiptoss over the top. Holly is right back up with a DDT and the dropkick with the backdrop completing the jobber level comeback. A missed charge lets Helmsley finish with the Pedigree at 7:10.

Rating: D. Oh come on. I know it’s a different era but this made Summerslam? I can get behind the idea of a match to make a newcomer look good but this wasn’t entertaining on any level. Helmsley was clearly someone they wanted to push but this would have been boring on Raw and we get it on a pay per view. At least it was short, but that’s all I’ve got.

Some wrestlers and firemen had a charity tug of war. Nothing wrong with that.

Blu Brothers vs. Smoking Gunns

Jacob (of Jacob and Eli Blu, which sounds conspicuously like Jake and Elwood Blues) gets caught in an early armbar from Billy. It’s off to Bart in a hurry but Eli snaps his throat across the top to take over. A quick crossbody gets Bart out of trouble though and Billy comes back in.

The yet to be named H Bomb (when they would become the Harris Twins that is) plants Billy for a delayed two and it’s off to the also yet to be named Tree of Woe (1995 needs to catch up with the times already). Lawler: “I bought five copies of Windows 95 and I don’t even have a computer.” After that random line, Eli gets two off a powerslam as the second Raw level match continues. Billy gets in a dropkick and brings in Bart to clean house. Heel miscommunication lets the Sidewinder connect for the fast pin on Eli at 6:11.

Rating: D-. At least in the Helmsley vs. Holly match (something that has never been said) they were pushing someone new and fresh. Here it’s a win for the Gunns, who had been around for years and were former Tag Team Champions. And against the Blu Brothers? That’s the best they can put together for what should be the second biggest show of the year? Thank goodness we were only a few weeks away from Nitro because this is some horrible planning.

We recap Barry Horowitz vs. Skip in a rematch of the huge upset of Barry pinning Skip. Barry then won by surviving a ten minute challenge, meaning it’s time for a third match. The idea here is that Barry hasn’t won a match in years but managed to pull this one off. How this is supposed to make me want to watch isn’t clear, as Barry is only going to be known to long time fans who are going to be watching in the first place.

Barry Horowitz vs. Skip

Sunny is out with Skip and does her trademark great rant about how they were cheated twice but it won’t happen again. Barry charges to the ring (with the awesome rock version of Hava Nagila) and hammers away to start with a clothesline putting Skip on the floor. Back in and Barry gets two off an O’Connor roll before suplexing Skip over the top again. Sunny tries to throw in the towel but is told that it’s not boxing and doesn’t count. Uh, it counted for Bob Backlund in 1983.

The distraction works well enough for Skip to jump Barry from behind, meaning it’s time for some jumping jacks. For some reason, this turns into a discussion of who would win in a fight between Siskel and Ebert. Barry is back up with some shoulders for two and a sunset flip for the same. Skip runs him over again though and it’s off to a seated abdominal stretch. That’s broken up as well and Horowitz goes old school with a Thesz press of all things for two more.

Skip pulls it back to the mat for legdrops and a chinlock but Barry jobbers up. They trade dropkicks and it’s a double knockdown as this keeps going. Another dropkick from Barry crotches him on top but Skip knocks him backwards. The Swan Dive gives Skip two so Barry hits another dropkick and goes up. This time it’s Sunny crotching him down for a change, which draws out Hakushi of all people. The distraction into a rollup lets Barry get his third straight win at 11:23.

Rating: D. AND??? Am I really supposed to get behind Horowitz after this? The guy has a career win/loss record somewhere lower than mine and now he’s getting a win on Summerslam? Somehow this is the best that they can do and that sums up a lot of the problems they were having around this point.

Dean Douglas uses a telestrator to talk about the previous match in big words. Barry gets an S for Slacker.

Shane throws it to Vince but we get Todd Pettengill instead, who gives us a look at the Wrestlemania X ladder match. Shawn Michaels says you can’t prepare for a ladder match but Razor isn’t taking his title again tonight.

Women’s Title: Bertha Faye vs. Alundra Blayze

Faye, with Harvey Wippleman, is challenging and her gimmick is that she’s large and not very attractive. This is one of those gimmicks that was bad then, worse later and horrible today. Blayze kicks her down to start and sweeps the leg for a bonus. More kicks have Bertha in trouble but she runs Blayze over, because she’s big you see.

The middle rope splash misses and Blayze gets two off a victory roll. Some running head slams get no cover as Harvey has the referee. Instead Blayze goes after him but can’t get the German suplex on Faye. A hurricanrana gives Blayze two and a missile dropkick has Faye reeling. Another dropkick misses though and it’s a sitout powerbomb to give Faye the pin and the title at 4:37.

Rating: D-. You can hear Vince laughing at this one and doing so all by himself. This gimmick isn’t funny and it’s a waste of someone as talented as she was. Is there any reason why they felt the need to humiliate someone that they brought in? There was nothing that the women could do when Faye was only allowed to use the “I’m big” offense in a short match. Terrible stuff here and it’s not on the wrestlers.

Post match Faye says she’s the beauty now and has the belt. Blayze would get it back in about two months.

We recap Undertaker vs. Kama Mustafa, who is the latest person to steal the urn (and melted it down into a big gold chain because reasons) as part of Undertaker vs. the Million Dollar Corporation, which felt like it went on forever. Kama even beat up some of the Creatures of the Night, meaning he’s gone too far. Therefore, it’s a casket match because what else could it be.

Paul Bearer and Undertaker promise to finish Kama.

Undertaker vs. Kama Mustafa

Casket match with Ted DiBiase in Kama’s corner to counter Bearer. Undertaker isn’t wasting time and picks Kama up for some choking and then throws him onto the casket. Something close to a Stinger Splash (THEY’RE DOING THE MATCH!!!) and Old School connects. The casket is opened revealing the Casket Cam as Kama is knocked in.

That goes nowhere this early and Kama is right back up with a top rope clothesline. Undertaker’s second Stinger Splash is caught with a powerslam and of course he sits up again. DiBiase offers a distraction so Kama can hammer and kick away. A clothesline puts Undertaker on top of the closed casket and a suplex does it again. Kama can’t piledrive him on the casket though and Undertaker backdrops him inside.

That’s fine with Kama, who hits a powerslam for a cover, checking off your required “I forgot this is a casket match” box. We hit the chinlock for a good while as the match just stops as they lay there. A belly to back suplex finally gives them something to do and the comeback is on.

The jumping clothesline connects but it’s a Cactus Clothesline to put them both in the casket. They come out and it’s a prototype of the famous shot of Shawn Michaels being dragged back in as Kama is put inside again. Back in and Kama grabs a swinging neckbreaker to put them both down again. The chokeslam connects though and it’s a Tombstone to finish Kama for good at 16:26.

Rating: D. It wasn’t even that it was bad but it was WAY too long with all of the laying around and Kama being the least believable opponent Undertaker has had in a long time. Kama felt like the villain in the fourth edition of an action movie series that has gone on too long and the star needed a paycheck. Really dull stuff here and the last thing the show needed.

Lawler is very excited about the idea of Isaac Yankem removing Bret Hart’s teeth.

Video on Yankem, who really is an evil dentist and we really are supposed to believe this as something threatening. Lawler vs. Hart has been going on for over two years now and has offered some awesome stuff, but as soon as Todd says “the King recruited a dentist”, it loses me a bit. Yankem is of course better known as Kane and his story of hearing that he was being brought in to be an evil dentist is rather funny.

Bret is ready to shut Lawler’s mouth. Bret to Yankem: “I don’t care if you’re a dentist.” Words never spoken in wrestling before or since.

Isaac Yankem vs. Bret Hart

Lawler handles Yankem’s entrance. As a bonus pun, Yankem is billed from Decay-tur, Illinois. Lawler is on commentary for a bit of a surprise as Bret gets shoved down to start. Yankem misses a big elbow but is fine enough to send Bret hard into the corner. Bret is back with an atomic drop and a clothesline for a trip to the floor. Back in and Bret hits a middle rope clothesline, followed by the headbutt to the abdomen.

The backslide gets two as Lawler is saying only Vince needs to be impartial tonight. Another hard whip into the corner takes Bret down again and Isaac chokes on the ropes until the referee drags him away by the hair. More choking ensues as Yankem doesn’t have the highest variety in his offense so far.

Bret is back up and sends him outside for a suicide dive as the comeback is on. Back in and it’s time for the Five Moves Of Doom but a Lawler distraction breaks up the Sharpshooter. Lawler stays up to cheer on Yankem’s beating (as he should) but Bret gets in a slam off the top for a rare power display.

In a change of pace, Bret ties Yankem’s legs around the post and stomps away until the referee unties Yankem’s feet. Lawler would do it but he’s too busy getting beaten up by Bret. The distraction lets Yankem hit a top rope ax handle to the back and Lawler helps him tie Bret’s neck in the ropes for the DQ at 16:10.

Rating: C+. Bret was doing everything he could here but Yankem wasn’t there yet and there’s only so much you can do as an evil dentist. The match felt straight out of Memphis with someone wanting to get at Lawler but he brought in his latest monster for protection. It’s a perfectly usable story and the match wasn’t bad, so I’ll take what I can get here.

Post match Lawler and Yankem pull at the still trapped Bret until referees break it up.

Razor Ramon isn’t scared of Shawn Michaels and he’ll take every chance he can get. If Shawn is ready to dance, Razor leads.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon

Shawn is defending in a ladder match, which was added due to “fan demand”, which is a rather accurate definition of what happened (originally scheduled to be Shawn vs. Sid before the company woke up and saw the rest of the card). The title is raised but hang on because Shawn isn’t happy with the way it’s attached to the hook (likely a problem with how the finish was supposed to go). Dok Hendrix has replaced Lawler on commentary.

They both look up at the title and then go to the slugout, as they should have done. The threat of an early superkick has Razor grabbing the ropes in a smart move. A Razor’s Edge attempt has Shawn looking worried so Razor throws him outside without much trouble. It’s time to go for the ladder but Shawn cuts Razor off from getting it. I’ve never gotten that but I guess it’s a pride thing.

They head back to the ring instead with Razor suplexing Shawn outside but Shawn’s leg hits the barricade in a nasty looking crash. Dok: “I might suggest that’s it.” Vince: “Uh yes that’s it.” Back in and Shawn escapes the Edge again but misses another superkick, meaning it’s a double clothesline to put them both down. Razor is up first and hits a super fall away slam as he continues the early dominance (they’re building things up here and that’s going to pay off in the end).

Now the ladder is brought in as we see Sid watching in the back. Shawn makes a fast save though and it’s his turn to grab the ladder, but he would rather hit Razor than climb. Razor breaks up a climb by pulling the tights down and then shoves the ladder over in a smart move. Replays show Shawn’s leg getting caught in the ladder on the way down as the focal point continues to grow.

The leg gets crushed in the ladder again and the fans aren’t pleased. Razor slams him legs first onto the ladder and then puts the ladder on the middle rope in the corner. That gives Razor another place to drop Shawn’s knee onto the ladder and it’s time to go into the Ric Flair cannonballs onto the leg. Shawn kicks him to the floor for a breather but that just lets Razor wrap the knee around the post. Back in and the knee gets wrenched again The ladder is set up in the middle of the ring but Shawn suplexes Razor back down for a double knockdown.

Shawn puts the ladder in the corner and whips Razor into it and bring the cheers back. A moonsault off the ladder lets Shawn hammer away but he misses the huge splash off the ladder (call back tot he previous match) and they’re both down again. They both make the slow climb and crash back down for a double crotching on the top. A missed charge with the ladder has Shawn falling out to the floor and Razor goes down with him. Shawn goes back in and sets up the ladder but Razor brings in a second ladder (a new concept at the time).

Razor drops his though and hits the Razor’s Edge off the original ladder for the big knockout shot. He can’t follow up though and they’re both down again. Both ladders are set up for a double climb but Shawn superkicks him down. Hang on though as Shawn isn’t under the belt so he jumps for it, meaning another crash down onto the bad leg. Another Razor’s Edge attempt is countered with a backdrop to the floor, allowing Shawn to go up and grab the title….but he falls again without the belt coming down. A ticked off Shawn goes up and pulls the title down to retain at 25:09.

Rating: A. Yeah this was outstanding and you could argue it’s better than the original. The big difference here was having the match involve a ladder instead of being about a ladder. They had a heck of a match with Razor working the leg and Shawn having to find a way around the power game. The teasing of finishers until the end was a great addition as well and the whole thing was a blast with big spots and awesome action throughout. Check this out and then go watch the first one again because you really could say either of them is better.

Post match Razor grabs the belt but hands it to Shawn for the nice moment.

Douglas doesn’t like Razor calling himself the Bad Guy when Razor comes in to knock him down with one punch.

Diesel isn’t worried about Mabel. You know, because he’s Mabel.

WWF World Title: King Mabel vs. Diesel

Mabel, with Sir Mo, is defending and the story here is finding out his Royal Plan. We get the trash talking before the bell and my goodness Mabel’s crown looks pitiful. It looks like it’s made of paper or cheap plastic and comes off like a toy instead of something serious. Kind of like his whole push in a way.

Mabel runs him over to start and chops away in the corner but Diesel forearms him back. The big slam doesn’t work so Diesel hits some clotheslines to put Mabel on the floor. Diesel actually manages a dive over the top (not terrible either) to take Mabel down but the fans just do not care. Mabel charges into a big boot but is back in with a….I guess Boss Man Slam, but he shoved Diesel down instead of picking him up. To mix it up a bit, Mabel sits on Diesel’s back but misses a backsplash.

The referee gets bumped so Mo comes in (which seems to be the Royal Plan), drawing out Lex Luger for the save. Well the attempted save at least as Luger is knocked outside, leaving Mabel to drop the leg on Diesel on the floor. Luger takes care of Mo (Did Luger just come out early or something? Also, that would be his last appearance in the company as he would debut on Nitro eight days later), leaving Mabel to hit the belly to belly for two. Mabel misses a middle rope splash though, allowing Diesel to hit a middle rope clothesline to retain at 9:16 (admittedly to a big pop).

Rating: D-. Oh come on what else were you expecting here? It’s freaking MABEL. Diesel is someone who can have a great match with the right opponent but Mabel is so far away from being the right opponent that he’s the left one. There’s no way to make this work as Mabel was nothing more than the big guy with a lame lackey. There was no way this was going to work, the match was terrible and they got them out of there almost as fast as possible. What else could this have been?

Overall Rating: D. There are some bright spots in here, but aside from the classic ladder match, this could have been any given house show. The opener was good, Bret vs. Yankem could have been a lot worse and the ladder match is awesome. Other than that, there is no reason to think of this as a special show in any way and that was very clear throughout. I know it’s a dark time for the company, but this was them putting out whatever they had because they had to do a show instead of trying to put on a great show. Terrible for the most part, with a few bright spots sprinkled in.

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