Monday Night Raw – May 17, 1993: This is What Put Raw on the Map
Monday Night Raw Date: May 17, 1993 Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 1,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, Bobby Heenan
To say these recent shows haven’t been interesting is a huge understatement. They’re just not working and haven’t been in almost the entire time the show has been on the air. You get a few moments that are better than the rest but really, the show feels like Superstars with a budget and we need more than that. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Earlier today, Savage and the Smoking Gunns supported some Special Olympians. Nothing wrong with that.
We look at last week’s brawl between Mr. Perfect and Shawn Michaels.
Lord Alfred Hayes says someone is here in disguise and we’ll see who it is later.
Smoking Gunns vs. Glenn Ruth/Tony Vajda
Ruth is more famous as Headbanger Thrasher. Bart hiptosses Vajda to start and the Gunns start tagging a bit. Ruth comes in and takes a clothesline as well but something is botched, only to have the Gunns save it with a double legsweep. Some very slow offense ensues, including some kicks and legdrops as the arm work continues. Billy backdrops Glenn into a piledriver (which might have been a botched powerbomb) for the pin.
Rating: D. Long and boring stuff here but that’s what you had to expect. The Gunns certainly weren’t a great team but at this point, there wasn’t exactly much to go around in the division. They helped bolster the ranks a little bit and that’s exactly what the division needed around this time.
Vince brings out Shawn Michaels for a chat and we hit the SHAWN IS GAY chants. Heenan: “You hear that? Shawn is great!” Shawn told us all that he would win the Intercontinental Title and defend it around the world, which is exactly what he did. He told us he would beat up Mr. Perfect and he’s done that too.
Vince suggests that Shawn isn’t exactly a fighting champion so Michaels agrees to face anyone anywhere anytime and you know that’s not something you say in wrestling. Cue a “fan” who looks a lot like Marty Jannetty in a hoodie and sunglasses. The “fan” gets in the ring and removes the hood and sunglasses to reveal….MARTY JANNETTY! He’ll take a title shot tonight and just happens to have his gear in the back. Vince says it’s on for later tonight.
Razor Ramon vs. The Kid
This one is kind of famous. Razor throws the toothpick in his face to start and lights up Kid’s chest with some chops. There’s the fall away slam and Razor slaps him in the back of the head. Razor misses a charge into the corner though and Kid goes up for a moonsault press for what might be the biggest upset in company history.
THIS is the moment that put Raw on the map. After being just another wrestling show for a few months, this match put it on the map as a show where things could happen. This isn’t some pin where interference led to a pin. The Kid capitalized on Ramon’s mistake and got a 100% clean pin. It’s the kind of thing you don’t see very often and the New York crowd ate it up. There’s a reason this one was on highlight reels for a very long time and it still shows up occasionally.
Tatanka vs. Scott Taylor
Taylor gets backdropped to the floor for a fast start as Heenan talks about toilet paper statistics. More throwing around ensues and Vince suggests the Kid should now be the 1-2-3 Kid. The Papoose to Go puts Taylor away.
Rating: D+. Another squash but the fans needed a minute to breathe after the huge upset. It really is amazing how well Tatanka did with such a generic gimmick. He wasn’t all that talented in the ring either but he made the most of it and that’s what matters more than anything. Fans can tell when you’re trying and that usually means success.
King of the Ring Report with Gene talking about the tournament and World Title match.
Yokozuna vs. Kamala
Kamala looks confused by Yokozuna’s entrance but he looks that way more often than not. The collision goes to Kamala and a superkick to the chest staggers the bigger man even more. Kamala chops away but a shot to the throat slows him down again. The huge leg crushes Kamala but he pops up for more chops. Fuji grabs the leg though and Yokozuna finishes with the usual.
Rating: D. This was actually a lot less bad (I can’t say better) than I was expecting here with Kamala giving us a few hope spots before losing in the end as you had to expect he would. Yokozuna was clearly on the way to getting the World Title back at the King of the Ring and there’s nothing wrong with that. He never should have lost it in the first place.
Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Marty Jannetty
Shawn is defending and gets rolled up a few times to start. A clothesline puts Shawn on the floor as Heenan is in full on panic mode early on. Marty follows him out with a slingshot plancha and the fans are WAY into him here. Back in and Marty grabs a flying headscissors for two as the very hot pace continues. A whip into the corner turns Shawn upside down and out to the floor. Michaels can’t walk out though as Mr. Perfect is waiting for him in the aisle.
Back from a break with Marty eating a hot shot and we hit the chinlock. A catapult sends Shawn had first into the post for a very close two as the fans continue to die over these near falls. Marty gets two off a jumping back elbow and powerslam, followed by a spinning crossbody for the same. Shawn comes right back with the superkick but stops to yell at Perfect. That earns Shawn a towel to the face, setting up a small package to give Marty the pin and the title.
Rating: B. This was the kind of fast paced match that you just didn’t get from Raw so far, making this even more impressive than usual. Marty winning the title (the first title change ever on the show) was a major deal as it made you feel like anything could happen. The fast pace helped a lot here and that’s why the match stood out: it was genuinely different and more proof that the line should be “the Jim Neidhart of the team” rather than the Marty.
Overall Rating: B+. This is the show that made people believe Raw was something different. Having two big surprises like that in a row made Raw feel so much different and really inspired the Monday Nitro formula. The idea here was to make Raw feel like a show you couldn’t miss and that’s exactly what they did. Really well done here and by far the benchmark for good Raw’s in the early days.
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Monday Night Raw Date: May 27, 1996
Location: Cumberland County Memorial Auditorium, Fayetteville, North Carolina
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler
We’re past In Your House VIII and….we saw about half the show. In a pretty famous moment, the arena’s power was knocked out by an electrical storm and aside from the first and last matches, the arena was dark for most of the night. Therefore this is actually a go home show with Tuesday offering a live Beware of Dog II. Let’s get to it.
Oh and over on Nitro, Scott Hall jumped the barricade.
King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Goldust vs. Ultimate Warrior
Rematch from their disaster of a “match” at In Your House VII and Goldust’s Intercontinental Title isn’t on the line. Warrior has to chase him on the floor to start and it’s time for the 80s offense to begin. Goldust’s right hands and forearms have no effect as Warrior easily throws him down.
A trip to the floor sees both guys being sent into various metal objects as Vince talks about Warrior’s completely insane (like, insane even by Warrior’s standards) comic book. An electric chair drop sends Goldust bailing but Ahmed Johnson drags him back to the ring as we head to a break.
Back with Warrior being thrown through Goldust’s wooden chair, drawing in some canned Warrior chants. Warrior’s banged up shoulder doesn’t prevent him from hitting a powerslam (suplex according to that nitwit Vince) but we hit the chinlock anyway. The comeback sends Goldust out to the floor with Warrior following him out for a horrible double countout.
Rating: D-. Was there something in the water in 1996? Who decided to book all these horrible non-finishes after such stupidly long matches? Warrior was just so out of place in 1996 and it showed more and more every time he got in the ring. The business had just passed him by at this point and there was no way around it. That and Goldust hadn’t sped his offense up yet to make him watchable. Just awful here, but that had to be expected.
Lawler threatens Warrior with the broken chair, setting off their infamous feud where Lawler claimed people didn’t care because Warrior wore a hat during a promo. Seriously, it’s on the Self-Destruction of the Ultimate Warrior DVD. Is there any wonder why Warrior sued over that hatchet job?
We go over Beware of Dog and the issues setting up the second show. This is a rare instance where things were out of the company’s hands and they did the only possible option.
Ted DiBiase thinks Savio Vega cheated in the dark last night so he’s willing to put up his WWF career in the rematch. The ending to that was flat out smart.
Smoking Gunns vs. BodyDonnas
The Gunns’ Tag Team Titles aren’t on the line (that would make too much sense) and they have Sunny with them after she tricked Phineas into making her their manager, which set up her turning on them less than a week later to get the belts on the Gunns. That makes this the BodyDonnas faces somehow and Hillbilly Jim is on commentary. Bart works on Zip’s arm to start and gorilla presses him down as we take an early break.
Back with various shots of cowgirl Sunny (that works) and Bart getting double teamed on the floor. Skip’s legdrop gets two and Zip’s gutwrench powerbomb is good for the same. We hit the chinlock for a long bit until Phineas Godwinn comes out to plead his case with Sunny. Jim and the Godwinns leave as Bart takes a double slingshot suplex. The illegal Skip goes up but Bart rolls through the high crossbody for the fast pin.
Rating: D+. WAY better match here as it actually felt entertaining at times. The Tag Team Title division needed a few adjustments but the Sunny story was better than having nothing at all. Once they got the face/heel alignment straightened out (that took some time) and got rid of Hillbilly Jim, everything wound up being….well it wound up being pretty dull but it was better than anything else we had seen for awhile.
We recap last night’s main event which ended in a double pin. I know Shawn gets a lot of flack for not drawing during this time but his first long feud was with British Bulldog. That’s no on Shawn.
King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Ahmed Johnson vs. Vader
Owen Hart is on commentary. They slowly shove each other to start and Ahmed isn’t intimidated in the slightest. Vader actually gets pummeled down in the corner and the place goes NUTS, giving one of the true genuinely strong reactions outside of Undertaker/Shawn you’ll ever see in this era.
Vader gets in a few shots but Ahmed shrugs it off and crossbodies Vader to the floor, taking the mask off in the process. Back from a break with Vader kneeing him in the ribs and hitting the middle rope clothesline for two. Ahmed comes back with his own hard clothesline but Vader drops him all over again. They’re beating the heck out of each other here and it’s pretty close to awesome.
We hit the chinlock as Owen claims that Ahmed cheated in the Kuwaiti Cup. He doesn’t give any reason why but insists that it happened. Simple yet effective heel stuff there, which is what often works best. Vader tries the moonsault and fails as usual, allowing Ahmed to get in a powerslam. Jim Cornette gets dragged in (Owen: “GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF MY MANAGER!”) and Ahmed spinebusters Vader, only to have Owen sneak in with a cast shot to the head to give Vader the pin. That’s Ahmed’s first loss.
Rating: C+. This is a good example of a match that might not be the highest quality but it was a lot of fun, which is exactly what a show like this needed. Vader was selling the heck out of Ahmed’s offense and the fans ate it up because Ahmed wasn’t like everyone else at this point. Vader could sell like few others and it’s no surprise that both of these guys would be in the main event scene soon.
Ahmed is taken out on a stretch and Goldust gives him mouth to mouth, leaving gold paint on his lips. Johnson loses it and chokes Bob Holly to find out where Goldust is. Ahmed runs through a guy in pink (who I thought was Bret Hart at the time) to get into Goldust’s locker room. That goes nowhere so Ahmed punches out the cameraman to end the show.
Overall Rating: C. Once we got past the endless opener, this turned into a much, much more entertaining show due to an actual story and a really fun main event. Johnson seemed destined to be a star and if he could speak anything close to English he would have been World Champion easily. Anyway, far better show than the last few weeks but that’s not saying much.
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Monday Night Raw Date: July 22, 1996
Location: Key Arena, Seattle, Washington
Attendance: 6,755
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler
We’re past the dreadful and worthless In Your House IX and nothing has changed. Vader pinned Shawn Michaels to become the de facto #1 contender and thankfully we’re about a month away from Summerslam so maybe things can pick up a little bit. Things have been so boring around here lately that I’m ready for anything new. Let’s get to it.
We open with a look at Seattle for a change of pace.
This arena is HUGE compared to the tiny places we’ve been in lately and it really makes things feel better.
Tag Team Titles: Shawn Michaels/Ahmed Johnson vs. Smoking Gunns
The Gunns are defending and it happens to be Shawn’s birthday so Sunny has a cake. She offers him a piece on the way to the ring (oh come on that’s too easy) but the Gunns jump the challengers from behind. Billy eats Sweet Chin Music (I’d prefer cake) and Ahmed shoves the cake into Sunny’s face. Shawn of course licks some of it off and there’s no match.
Post break, Gorilla Monsoon says the Gunns will defend the titles later tonight or they’ll be stripped of the titles.
The Goon vs. Marc Mero
What did Mero do to deserve these horrible matches? Steve Austin sits in on commentary to spice things up a little bit. Goon tries a hip check and various other hockey moves and they’re uh, bad. A snapmare sets up a chinlock on Mero as Jake Roberts calls in so Lawler can make alcoholism jokes. Goon kicks him in the face as the call ends. Mero hooks a horrible looking victory roll for two as Austin goes on an anti-Lex Luger rant for some reason. Oh and he’ll be ready to beat up Undertaker next week.
Goon grabs a chinlock as the alcohol jokes continue. At least it allows me to notice Goon’s ice skate shaped boots, a very nice touch. They head outside where Goon slips on the icing (oh geez) and hip checks the steps. Mero takes him down again with a flip dive, followed by a slingshot legdrop for the pin.
Rating: D-. Another horrible match here as Goon was a wrestling hockey player. I’ll give them something for having so many nice details but at the end of the day they’re putting this much effort into such a stupid gimmick. The crowd popped a lot stronger at the end and that’s a good sign, but can we PLEASE find a more interesting match already?
Shawn and Ahmed say they’ll win tonight.
Bob Backlund campaigns for President.
Attorney Clarence Mason lobbies Monsoon to let an ex-con back into the WWF. You can see Crush from behind as he stands next to them so it’s not really a secret.
Mankind vs. Freddie Joe Floyd
Freddie actually kicks Mankind outside to start but Mankind throws him into the ropes and pulls his own hair out. A discus clothesline sets up some choking in the corner and I’ll let you guess who is in control. Floyd is caught in the Tree of Woe but he avoids the running knee. Mankind eats a good looking top rope back elbow to the jaw but the Mandible Claw ends Floyd in a hurry.
Rating: C-. Actually not bad here, especially for a squash. Floyd was an energetic and talented guy who had a lot of success elsewhere (as Tracy Smothers in case you’re not familiar) so it was no surprise that he was one of the better options for this batch of losers who are running around the company at the moment.
Goldust vs. Barry Horowitz
Brian Pillman is on commentary and promises to say the seven words you can’t say on television. If nothing else we get the rocking Hava Nagila theme for Horowitz. Before we’re ready to go, we hear from Marc Mero about giving Vader cat scratch fever next week. Oh and he’s feuding with Goldust to make this actually matter. Brian makes lesbian jokes about Marlena and Sable as Goldust slowly beats on Barry. The Curtain Call wraps this up in a hurry.
Sunny and the Smoking Gunns are livid but know they’ll keep the belts.
Jim Cornette announces Vader as #1 contender for Shawn’s title at Summerslam. He’s going to take Shawn’s lunch money you see.
Tag Team Titles: Smoking Gunns vs. Shawn Michaels/Ahmed Johnson
The Gunns are defending again as that actually hasn’t changed in the last half hour. It’s a brawl to start with the challengers cleaning house and sending the Gunns outside. We settle down to Shawn punching Billy to officially start with Gunn quickly being knocked outside. Ahmed comes in to work on the arm as Billy begs off faster than someone asked to watch a Billy Gunn tape. Vince calls the team of Ahmed and Sid a threesome and I’m leaving that one alone.
A release powerslam (worse than it sounds) sends Billy flying and it’s back to Shawn for two off an ax handle. Bart finally cheats by breaking up a flying headscissors to put Shawn in trouble. The beatdown continues and of course the referee misses the tag off to Ahmed. Back from a break with Billy sending Shawn into the buckle for a near fall before slapping on a chinlock. That goes nowhere and the hot tag brings in Ahmed to clean house. Bart low bridges him though and here’s the debuting Faarooq (in full blue gladiator attire) to destroy Ahmed for the DQ.
Rating: C. This was already a huge improvement over everything we’ve seen in recent weeks and even then it’s still not all that great. It just helps when they have so much energy in a match like this, despite the screwy finish that set up something more down the line. At least this can get Shawn out of this story and ready to fight Vader.
The beating continues with Lawler actually mentioning Ron Simmons. Faarooq pledges his loyalty to Sunny to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. Bad Goon match aside, this was much better than the previous weeks with some passable wrestling and a hot crowd. The fact that we’re coming up on Summerslam helps too as we’re actually getting ready for a show that matters instead of a mess like In Your House IX. Hopefully things stay warm like this as I can tolerate these shows for a little while at least.
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In Your House IX: International Incident (2013 Redo): The Most Worthless Show Ever
In Your House #9: International Incident Date: July 21, 1996
Location: General Motors Place, Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada
Attendance: 14,804
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross
The People’s Posse originally had the Ultimate Warrior teaming up with Johnson and Michaels, but Warrior bailed on the company again for asking for too much time off. Warrior claimed he was leaving due to not getting money he was owed and Vince McMahon claiming that he didn’t buy Warrior’s excuse of grieving over his father’s death. Either way, we get Sid tonight which might actually be the better option. Let’s get to it.
Earlier tonight on the Free For All, Cornette swung the tennis racket at Jose Lothario but got punched in the face for his efforts. Vader and Shawn came in to prevent any further violence. The main catch for the
Smoking Gunns vs. Bodydonnas
The Gunns are champions and have Sunny with them but this is non-title. The Bodydonnas have turned face with a new manager named Cloudy (a man in woman’s clothing), but no one cares about them at all either way. Sunny, who looks great as a cowgirl, won’t let Vince hold the tag titles. The Gunns are sent to the floor to start before we get down to Bart vs. Zip. They trade chops with neither guy seeming all that interested in selling for the other. Zip takes him down with an armdrag into an armbar before bringing in Skip to crank on it as well.
Bart gets tired of having his arm pulled apart so he throws Skip down and brings in Billy to fire off some right hands. A nice headscissors puts Billy down and Skip spins out of a few hiptosses, only to be punched down for his efforts. Skip grabs another armbar as the match slows down all over again. Out of nowhere Sunny collapses but as Skip goes to check on her she slaps him in the face, allowing the Gunns to clothesline him down.
Back in and the Gunns take over with Bart whipping Skip HARD into the corner to take him down. Skip comes back with a quick clothesline and goes up top, only to dive into a sweet powerslam for two. With Skip draped throat first over the top and Bart holding his legs up, Billy tries to jump over his partner’s back to land on Skip’s back but can’t get up and over Bart. If you can’t do the spot, don’t try it.
Skip and Bart mistime something out of the corner and awkwardly stop in the middle of the ring. Bart goes up top but jumps into an atomic drop, allowing for the hot tag off to Zip. Billy trips Zip down but can’t get in place for the Sidewinder (side slam/guillotine legdrop combo), allowing Skip to hit a missile dropkick on Bart to give Zip the pin.
Rating: D. This was a horrible choice for an opening match with WAY too much time and the botches dragging the match down. On top of that, why in the world would you make this a non-title match? To set up a future rematch? Why in the world wouldn’t you do this on Raw and then have the title match here? Very dull match here.
Camp Cornette rants about the fight with Cornette and Lothario while guaranteeing a win later.
Mankind vs. Henry Godwinn
Mankind is one of the most bizarre characters in wrestling history. He debuted the night after Wrestlemania and immediately targeted the Undertaker, easily beating him down like no one else ever had before. Mankind lives in a boiler room, often sits on the mat and rocks back and forth and is known to pull out his hair. He also wears a leather mask that covers half of his face and is missing part of an ear. Henry is substituting for Jake Roberts who didn’t show up for the show.
Mankind jumps Godwinn from behind to start but Henry is more than comfortable in a slugout. He punches Mankind in the face a few times and powerslams him down for two. Mankind pounds him down with shots to the back as Lawler makes jokes about Roberts’ substance abuse issues. Henry sweeps Mankind’s legs out and hits some HARD shots to the face, only to have Mankind choke him for a breather.
A running knee to Henry’s face has him in even more trouble so Mankind goes to the floor and pulls back the mats. Henry gets taken down by a swinging neckbreaker onto the concrete. Back in and Mankind misses a charge into the corner but he easily sends Henry out to the floor. Godwinn comes right back by slamming Mankind from the apron to the concrete but the Slop Drop is countered with into Mankind’s Mandible Claw for the win.
Rating: D+. Nothing great here but it was a nice brawl while it lasted. Henry was stuck in a stupid gimmick but he could throw some great right hands and brawl with the best of them. There’s nothing wrong with having a guy like that around as you’re going to get an entertaining match more often than not. Still though, nothing great here.
Mankind sprints up the aisle but stops at the entrance because he’s a bit strange.
Marc Mero vs. Steve Austin
This is a rematch from the King of the Ring tournament. Austin jumps him right after the bell but Mero comes back with a quick armbar. That gets him nowhere so Steve grabs a headlock and takes him down to the mat. Back up and they slug it out with Mero, a former New York Golden Gloves Champion, easily taking control. Austin is knocked to the floor and goes after Sable, only to be jumped from behind.
Back inside and Steve gets rolled up for two but manages to send Mero out to the floor to take over. A catapult sends Mero face first into the post and another shot knocks him off the apron and into the barricade. Back in and a middle rope elbow gets two for Austin and we hit a reverse chinlock. Austin slaps Mero in the back of the head but misses a charge and lands on the middle rope to give Marc a breather.
Steve goes up but gets crotched down, allowing Mero to pull him down and hook a hurricanrana to send both guys to the floor. A moonsault press off the apron takes Austin down again and a slingshot moonsault gets two back inside. Mero pounds away with right hands in the corner but Austin shoves him to the side, crotching Mero on the top rope. Marc blocks Austin’s Stunner finisher and gets two off a slingshot legdrop. For some reason Marlena comes out to watch the ending. Not that it matters though Austin comes back with a quick chop block and the Stunner connects for the pin.
Rating: C. Good stuff here for the most part but the match felt off for some reason. It’s very interesting to see Austin evolve the Stunner over the years as there’s no kick to the ribs yet and he just snaps it off. Mero wasn’t bad in the ring at all but he never quite fit in the WWF.
Former WWF Champion Bob Backlund is running for President of the United States and looks for registered voters in the crowd.
Highlight video on the Undertaker’s feuds with Mankind and Goldust, which is set up like a music video for some reason.
Goldust vs. Undertaker
Goldust, who has since lost the Intercontinental Title to Ahmed Johnson, bails to the floor to start and does so again after Undertaker moves towards him. He gets in again and hides behind the referee for a few moments before doing his trademark deep breath. It only earns him an uppercut to the jaw, sending Goldust right back to the floor for more stalling. Lawler makes movie references as Goldust teases walking out and VERY slowly gets back in the ring.
Undertaker finally goes out after him and chokeslams Goldust down onto the steps in an awkward looking sequence. Undertaker picks up the steps but won’t crush Marlena along with Goldust. Apparently he’s a zombie with a heart. Back in and Goldust gets clotheslined down before a legdrop gets two for Undertaker. This has been one sided so far. Goldust finally comes back with some knees in the corner to take over but Undertaker grabs him by the throat and throws him into the corner to hand out a beating.
The fans chant Rest in Peace (Undertaker catchphrase) as he connects with Old School and some uppercuts. Goldust clotheslines Undertaker over the top rope but Undertaker lands on his feet and keeps firing off uppercuts. Something resembling a Stunner across the top rope snaps Goldust’s neck back but he uses the distraction to pull the turnbuckle pad away. Undertaker is sent back first into the exposed steel to finally give Goldust control.
They head outside again so Goldust can drop the steps on Undertaker’s back to further his advantage. Back in and Goldust puts on a reverse chinlock to keep the pace of the match very slow. The fans chant for Undertaker so Goldust breaks the hold like any idiot heel would do. Undertaker comes back with a big boot to the face and a small package of all things for two. The flying clothesline takes Goldust down and there’s the Tombstone, drawing Mankind up through a hole in the ring for the DQ.
Rating: D-. Way too long here and horribly boring due to all of the stalling. Goldust and Undertaker had some of the least interesting matches I can ever remember for two guys with as much talent as they have. It was clearly just a backdrop for Undertaker vs. Mankind, which isn’t something you spend three months on.
Mankind pulls Undertaker through the hole with the Mandible Claw before crawling back out on his own. The lights flicker and Undertaker’s music plays but he comes out of another hole to sneak up on Mankind. They brawl to the back to one of the only good reactions of the night.
The announcers talk about the main event while the ring is repaired.
We go to the back to see the brawl between Undertaker and Mankind continue.
Goldust and Marlena are in the boiler room where Mankind and Undertaker were fighting earlier. Goldust quotes Kramer vs. Kramer when Mankind pops up and calls Goldust mommy. Mankind rams his head into a cabinet while screaming about what mommy wants, mommy gets.
The announcers ignore what we just saw and talk about the main event a bit more.
We recap the main event six man tag which started at King of the Ring. Shawn pinned British Bulldog in the rematch but Vader and Owen Hart came in for a post match attack. Ultimate Warrior and Ahmed Johnson came in for the save, setting up the six man. Ultimate Warrior was suspended a few weeks after for reasons already mentioned, so Shawn and Ahmed brought in Sid to take his place. It’s not clear if Sid can be trusted though.
The People’s Posse says they can trust Sid and they’ll win tonight.
People’s Posse vs. Camp Cornette
If Camp Cornette loses, Cornette has to pay back all of the fans, which would cost him millions. Also Owen has a broken arm coming in. Vader and Ahmed start things off but Vader wants the world champion instead. Shawn is happy to oblige and is easily shoved away by the monster. Vader lifts Shawn into the air in a choke but Shawn punches his way to freedom. Shawn speeds things up and actually hits a running hurricanrana to take Vader down. A cross body sends Vader to the floor and Michaels follows with a nice plancha to take the monster down.
Shawn tries another hurricanrana but gets hit a bit low to give Vader control. Vader pounds away in the corner and Shawn is in quick trouble. Michaels manages to escapes a belly to back suplex and makes the hot tag off to Sid for a battle of the giants. Sid cleans house and sends all of Camp Cornette out to the floor, drawing a HUGE reaction from the crowd. Owen tries to sneak in from behind but is easily taken down by another clothesline. Off to Johnson who actually rolls German suplexes on Owen.
Johnson misses an elbow drop and it’s off to the Bulldog to pound away for a bit until he gets caught in a spinebuster. Ahmed hits his Pearl River Plunge tiger bomb but it’s Owen making the save. Off to Vader for some power but Ahmed pounds him down in the corner to keep the fans into things the entire way through. Vader easily reverses a whip into the corner and hits a hard splash followed by even more fists to the head and body. Another splash attempt is caught in a slam which looked WAY easier than it should have for Ahmed.
Owen comes in and takes Johnson down with a spinwheel kick but Johnson pops up at two. Johnson keeps coming back with a gorilla press slam and it’s back to Sid for a big boot to the face before firing off some very fast right hands in the corner. Sid whips Owen into the Cornette corner and it’s time for the Bulldog vs. Sid power match. Smith actually lifts him up in the delayed vertical suplex and a Vader elbow is good for two. Vader runs Sid over again and brings Smith back in for some headbutts.
Sid is able to get in a shot to the face and makes the tag off to Shawn, but Bulldog quickly avoids a charge to send Shawn shoulder first into the post. Shawn sends Bulldog into Vader to knock the big man off the apron and get a pair of two counts on Smith. Back to Owen to trade some VERY fast rollups with Shawn for two each before Shawn gets two more off a cross body. A victory roll gets the same for Michaels and they head to the mat before bridging into Ric Flair’s trademark pinfall reversal sequence. Outstanding sequence there.
Back to Bulldog for a legdrop but Michaels avoids an elbow drop to get a breather. Owen finally uses the cast on the bad arm to put Shawn down and it’s back to Vader to pound away on the world champion. Shawn is whipped across the ring and goes over the corner and out to the floor in a big crash. After Owen and Bulldog get in some cheap shots on the floor it’s back in for a half standing chinlock/half bearhug on Shawn with Vader’s arms wrapped around his neck and under his arms. Not a bad looking hold actually.
The hold stays on for awhile as a fan tries to interfere and is easily run off by Bulldog and the referee. After several minutes of the hold, Vader throws Shawn down and splashes him but Ahmed comes in to break up a cover. Bulldog comes in and puts on an over the shoulder backbreaker followed by a fallaway slam for two. Smith misses a charge into the corner but it’s Hart breaking up the hot tag attempt yet again.
Shawn punches Owen down but can’t follow up, allowing for another tag back to Davey, whose cover is quickly broken up by a Sid legdrop. Vader gets the tag and Shawn crawls over to make one as well, but the referee doesn’t see Ahmed get the tag. Johnson protests but Shawn gets triple teamed, giving Bulldog another two count. Owen tries a missile dropkick but hits Bulldog by mistake, allowing Shawn to FINALLY make the tag off to Sid.
The big man cleans house and chokeslams every member of Camp Cornette before launching Shawn off the top onto Vader for two. Everything breaks down and Cornette throws in the tennis racket but Shawn intercepts it to clock Vader in the head. Somehow that’s only good for two so Shawn tunes up the band, only to have Cornette trip him up. Vader runs Michaels over and hits the Vader Bomb for the pin to suck the life out of the crowd.
Rating: A-. REALLY good match here with everyone working hard and having a match that had the fans going nuts. Sid’s popularity is nearly astounding as the guy was just crazy over on about three moves. The ending was obvious, but on rare occasions that’s not a bad thing with this being a good example of that.
Post match Sid and Ahmed clean house with powerbombs to Owen and Bulldog but Vader is pulled to safety. Shawn dives over the top and takes out Vader, sending Camp Cornette running off. A lot of posing ends the show.
Overall Rating: D. The only thing that is holding up this show is the main event. Let’s look at this entire card: what in the world would you want to pay for on this show? There are five matches, zero titles on the line, and the one match that might draw some interest had a telegraphed ending. This was a terribly uninteresting show which set a record for the lowest buyrate in company history as not many people cared about seeing this show. It also doesn’t help that two weeks prior to this, Hulk Hogan turned heel in WCW, lighting the fire that would burn the WWF as close to a crisp as you can be for the next year and a half.
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In Your House #1: Mother’s Day Mayhem (2013 Redo): The Short Form
In Your House #1 Date: May 14, 1995
Location: Onondaga War Memorial, Syracuse, New York
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Doc Hendrix
Other than the matches mentioned, the main story tonight is the WWF giving away an actual house down in Florida to play up the In Your House name. This was a major idea that was heavily promoted on WWF television leading up to the show. It was a nice marketing idea as it gave some adults a reason to care about the show and possibly buy it for their kids. Let’s get to it.
The opening video talks about the clash of the giants as well as several other matches on the card.
It’s Mother’s Day, meaning the announcers are going to talk about moms a lot tonight.
The set is exactly what you would expect: a big house with the wrestlers walking through the garage to get to the ring.
Bret Hart vs. Hakushi
Hakushi has his manager Shinja with him. Bret is in the back and says he’s going to prove how great he is and that he’s dedicated this match to his mother. How nice of him. Hakushi is a very unique looking wrestler as he has Japanese characters all over himself, giving him a nickname of the walking Japanese menu. Bret grabs a headlock to start but Hakushi easily escapes to a standoff. Now Bret tries the arm, only to be pulled to the mat by the hair.
The fans chant USA as Hakushi takes Bret down with a flying headbutt for two. Off to an armbar as this is still firmly in first gear. The stupid USA chant begins again, or maybe they’re all fans of the referee? Now it’s Bret on the arm before easily armdragging Hakushi down again, this time to the floor for a breather. Back in and Bret pounds away as things start to pick up again. Hakushi comes back with a kick to the face and what we would call a Vader Bomb for two.
Jerry Lawler is watching gleefully in the back as he still gets to face Bret later in the night. Hakushi stomps Bret down in the corner and hits what we would call a Bronco Buster before stopping to pose. Back up and Hakushi blocks an O’Connor Roll, sending Bret to the floor so he can be stomped even more by Shinja. Another Shinja distraction allows Hakushi to choke even more as the crowd is getting into this. Bret’s comeback is easily stopped by a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker, setting up a swan dive headbutt from Hakushi for two. Hakushi’s springboard splash misses completely and Bret is back on his feet.
Bret comes back with the Five Moves of Doom (Russian legsweep, backbreaker, middle rope elbow, atomic drop, Sharpshooter, pick an order for the first four) but he has to stop and deal with Shinja again. Bret pounds away on Hakushi but gets tripped by Shinja AGAIN, finally causing him to dive through the ropes and pound the man in the white suit.
Back in and Hart reverses a suplex into one of his own, sending both guys out to the floor in a nice crash. Shinja’s distraction allows Hakushi to get back up and hit a top rope Asai Moonsault to take both guys down again. Hart’s ankle might have been twisted in the process. Bret is pulled back in but has his rollup countered into an attempted German suplex, only to counter that into a victory roll to finally beat Hakushi.
Rating: B. Really solid match here and a great way to open up the show as well as the series. Hakushi wasn’t really much of note after this but that’s what Bret was best at: getting the most out of anyone he worked with. Really fun match here which had the time to get going and build into what it needed to be.
Bret twists his knee getting to the floor.
A way too excited woman looks at the entries in the sweepstakes for the house. We even get a video of the truck bringing the entries here earlier today. Seriously.
Jeff Jarrett/Roadie vs. Razor Ramon
Handicap match here after Roadie (more famous as the Road Dogg) helped Jarrett take Razor’s Intercontinental Title at the Royal Rumble. Razor’s normal partner the 1-2-3 Kid is out with an injury and calls in to say he’s watching the match. In the back, Razor also dedicates this match to his mom. Vince yells about Roadie and Jarrett both being in the ring to start, prompting Hayes to say that Vince doesn’t make the rules around here in a funny line.
Jarrett starts for the team and is promptly punched down and then slapped in the face. Roadie is lurking around the floor before getting back up on the apron. Back in and Jeff misses a dropkick before being clotheslined hard out to the floor. Roadie gets in a cheap shot to take Razor down from behind, allowing Jarrett to connect with an enziguri to take over. Not that it matters though as Ramon catches Jeff’s cross body in the fallaway slam for two.
Roadie comes in for his first match and scores with a quick clothesline and a snapmare to put him down. Back to Jarrett who gets a quick two off a sunset flip before Razor gets the same off a small package. Not exactly thrilling stuff so far but they’re not boring the people to death. After more basic stuff from Roadie it’s back to Jeff, only to have him jump right into a punch to the ribs. Razor is backdropped out to the floor and there goes his bad knee again. Roadie adds a middle rope clothesline and Ramon is in big trouble.
Back in and Ramon is dazed but still manages to roll through a top rope cross body from Jeff into a two count, only to be taken right back down with a neckbreaker. Jeff’s running hip attack only hits ropes but Razor collides with him, putting both guys down again. Ramon has the word Kid written on his boots. Back up again and Razor hits a belly to back suplex, putting both guys down one more time.
Jeff is able to make the tag before Razor can get up and it’s Roadie hitting a middle rope knee drop for two. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Razor fights up and jawbreaks his way to freedom, putting both guys down for the third time in five minutes. Razor suplexes both guys down but Jeff goes to the bad knee to slow him up. The Figure Four is kicked away though, sending Jeff into Roadie and a quick Razor’s Edge takes Jeff out for the pin.
Rating: C. Not bad here but it could have been the same match in about half the time. On top of that the knee injury really didn’t play much of a role in the match after the announcers talked so much about how bad Razor’s knee was. This feud wouldn’t last much longer but it worked pretty well for both Jarrett and Ramon.
Post match the heels go after the knee but Portuguese wrestler Aldo Montoya tries to make the save. That goes nowhere so here’s yet to be named Savio Vega from the crowd for the real save, only to have him be taken away by police.
Jerry Lawler wants to face Bret right now but president Jack Tunney says no.
Video on Sid dominating his way to the title match tonight.
King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Mabel vs. Adam Bomb
Bomb is about 6’4 and over 300lb but Mabel towers over him at 6’10 and 508lb. Mabel has recently turned heel so he jumps Bomb before the bell rings. A splash in the corner has Bomb in trouble but he comes back with right hands to send Mabel to the floor. Adam dives out onto Mabel and pounds away before sending him back inside for a pair of top rope clotheslines, getting two each. Not that it matters much though as Mabel catches Adam’s cross body and falls down on him (think Mark Henry’s World’s Strongest Slam) for the pin in less than two minutes. Mabel was his usual fat and worthless self here.
Razor introduces the man that saved him as Caribbean wrestling legend Savio Vega.
Tag Titles: Smoking Gunns vs. Yokozuna/Owen Hart
Yokozuna was Owen’s mystery partner at Wrestlemania where they took the belts from the Gunns. Lawler is out here again but still can’t get his match with Bret at the moment. The champions are managed by Mr. Fuji and Jim Cornette. Billy tries to grab a headlock on the 600lb+ Yokozuna and it works as well as you would expect it to. A pair of dropkicks work a bit better but Yoko headbutts Bart down before bringing in Owen.
The Gunns can handle a guy Owen’s size and take him down with a nice dropkick/suplex combination, only to go after Yoko again for some reason. Hart comes back with an enziguri to take Billy down before it’s back to Yoko for a big clothesline. We hit the nerve hold on Billy before it’s back to Owen who gets two off a neckbreaker.
A great looking enziguri puts Billy on the outside but he avoids a charge, sending Yoko into the post. Owen misses a charge of his own and there’s the somewhat hot tag off to Bart. A suplex puts Hart down and the Gunns hit a belly to back/neckbreaker combo for another two before Bart misses a dive and lands on the floor. Yoko drops a leg to crush him ever further before throwing him back in to Owen for the retaining pin.
Rating: D+. The match wasn’t anything great but with less than six minutes there’s only so much they could have done. The problem with Yokozuna is there’s only so much anyone can do against him and it makes it hard to work around him. Not a horrible match due to Owen but it still wasn’t anything of note.
Diesel is sad because his mom died right after Christmas so he wishes all the other Mother’s a good day. He’s sore from an attack by Henry Godwinn but says he’s 100%. Diesel is also glad that Shawn Michaels will be watching at ringside.
Here’s Jerry Lawler in the ring with his…..mother, who looks to be about 24 years old. She wants to see Lawler, who is in his mid 40s here, beat Bret and then challenge Bret’s mom to a fight. We cut to the back to see Bret almost dancing because, in classic Hart fashion, he faked the injury.
Jerry Lawler vs. Bret Hart
Jerry didn’t see the interview so Bret limps to the ring again, only to climb in with ease. Lawler tries to run but gets caught in the corner where Bret pounds away. Bret takes him down with a slam and some legdrops followed by a BIG backdrop. All Hart so far but Lawler comes back with a quick piledriver (his finisher) but Bret is up in just a few seconds. He pounds way on Jerry in the corner again before piledriving Lawler down for one.
Jerry comes back with a slam of his own while going up top, only to jump into Bret’s fist to the ribs. Bret pounds away but here’s Shinja to distract Hart for about the 12th time tonight. The referee is knocked into the ropes and gets his ankle tied up in the ropes as Bret hits the Russian legsweep. Hakushi comes in and takes out Bret with a kick to the head and two top rope headbutts, giving Lawler the easy pin.
Rating: D+. Again this didn’t have the time to go anywhere as the last two matches haven’t even combined to go 11 minutes. Lawler vs. Hart was a feud that went on for over two years and would culminate soon enough. This wasn’t the best entry in the series though but it furthered both itself and Hakushi vs. Bret so no complaints there.
Post match Bret gets up but Lawler escapes with his “mom”.
Sid very slowly says he’ll win the title and that he rules the world.
We look at the sweepstakes house in Orlando. Interviewer Todd Petingill finds some rakes in the garage so he and the annoying interview can mix up the entries before drawing out the winner whom they call with the results. Thankfully this only takes about five minutes.
The announcers talk about the main event for a bit.
WWF World Title: Sycho Sid vs. Diesel
Diesel is defending of course and Sid has Ted DiBiase as his manager. The idea here is they both use powerbombs as their finishers, which should tell you a lot about this match. Diesel fires off forearms to start and hits some running clotheslines in the corner to stagger Sid. An elbow to the jaw puts Sid on the floor and it’s time for a breather. Back in and three straight clotheslines get two on Sid as this is all Diesel so far. Sid pulls Diesel to the outside and knocks him down to take over for the first time.
Diesel is sent into the apron and post as the match slows way down with the challenger in control. A running boot to the side of the head has Diesel in even more trouble before they head back inside for clubbing forearms to Diesel’s back. Sid stops to pose, meaning he didn’t pay attention to the opening match. More shots to the back have Diesel in even more trouble and we hit a camel clutch. After about a minute and a half in the hold Diesel fights out, only to have Sid cannonball down onto his back for two.
Back to the camel clutch with Sid leaning forward, as in the exact opposite of what he’s supposed to be doing. At least pull your arms back man. Diesel starts breaking it, presumably out of boredom, and avoids a second cannonball attempt. Not that it matters though as Sid chokeslams him down and hits a quick powerbomb but poses instead of covering. DiBiase freaks out until Diesel is up at about two and one tenth. Diesel avoids a charge into the corner and drops Sid face first onto the buckle. There are the big boot and the Jackknife powerbomb but DiBiase’s other man Tatanka comes in for the DQ.
Rating: D. There’s a reason you rarely see matches with the same style going for a long time: they’re not very good. The styles clash is too much to overcome and when it’s such a basic style like these two have, it doesn’t work well at all. Two similar styles can work, but you better be awesome at that style. Sid isn’t particularly good at anything in the ring and this was a prime example.
Sid, Tatanka and DiBiase triple team Diesel until Bam Bam Bigelow, a man DiBiase fired a month earlier, makes the save. Wasn’t Shawn supposed to be watching live?
Overall Rating: D+. The opening match was solid stuff but after that everything flew by until the horrible main event. This was a bad time for the company as Diesel wasn’t very interesting on top of the card but he could have good matches with the right opponents. Sid was so far from the right opponent that he was left, making for a bad match. Not much to see here but things would get a lot better. Also, the show only ran for 96 minutes, which just isn’t enough to go anywhere.
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Monday Night Raw – October 21, 1996: The Changes Start Here
Monday Night Raw Date: October 21, 1996
Location: War Memorial Coliseum, Fort Wayne, Indiana
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler
Buried Alive has come and gone and now we can get on to the serious stuff with Survivor Series coming up in just a few weeks. Sid is the new #1 contender to Shawn Michaels’ WWF World Title while Mankind was buried alive in a not that great brawl. Tonight is about change though as last week’s rating was such a disaster that something had to be done. Let’s get to it.
The opening video talks about Bret Hart and Mr. Perfect returning tonight.
Sycho Sid vs. Owen Hart
Owen is one half of the Tag Team Champions. Sid starts fast and knocks Owen to the floor but Hart clotheslines him over the top and out to the floor for a crash. Cue the British Bulldog for a few cheap shots, allowing Owen to hit Sid in the leg as we take a break. Back with Sid still being beaten down and having his leg worked on. I mean he’s barely selling it but it is being worked on.
Sid keeps trying to fight back but Owen kicks the leg out to stay in control. A quick comeback (with no injury in sight) ends with Sid missing a legdrop so Owen can hit the knee even more. This is the same thing that happened to Benoit when Sid wouldn’t sell the knee against him in 1999. A leglock goes nowhere so Sid hits a chokeslam to draw in Bulldog for the DQ.
Rating: D-. That’s all on Sid as Owen was doing the logical play of going after the big man’s knee but there’s not much he can do when Sid just won’t sell the stupid thing. That was a standard from Sid and it got old in a hurry but that’s what you had to expect from him. Owen can only do what he can and the rest is up to Sid. You can’t blame Owen for Sid being a schnook.
Shawn Michaels comes in for the save which Sid doesn’t seem to appreciate.
Stills of the Buried Alive match which Undertaker won, only to be buried alive himself thanks to a masked executioner and a bunch of other villains. Undertaker’s hand came through the dirt to end the show. This would be better if the Smoking Gunns’ music wasn’t playing over the end of the package.
Smoking Gunns vs. The Godwinns
JR comes out to do commentary and make sure the show is dragged down as a result. The bell rings and we’re finally ready to go after nearly a minute thanks to Hillbilly Jim (Godwinns’ manager in a perfect fit) doing his clapping stomps. Bart and Phineas slowly get things going with Bart working on the arm before we take an early break.
Back with Bart coming in again as we start talking about Bret instead of this boring match. Billy misses a charge into the corner and the hot (I think?) tag brings in Henry to clean house. It wasn’t that dirty in the first place but there has to be something to spice this match up. The Slop Drop ends Bart in a hurry.
Rating: D. Can we just get Bret and Perfect out here already? These boring acts are getting harder and harder to sit through as the wrestling is horrible and the stories aren’t the most interesting in the world either. The Gunns splitting could spice things up a bit but Bart just isn’t going to be worth watching no matter what.
Pat Patterson Hall of Fame video.
Mr. Perfect is warming up when Helmsley jumps him from behind. Perfect comes up holding his knee and I think you know what’s coming.
Clip from Livewire (which apparently was a much bigger deal than you would think) of Austin saying he wants to take out Bret.
Here’s Bret for his big return speech. He gets right to the point: a rival wrestling promotion (not named but I doubt it’s ECW) has been in negotiations with him but he’s not sure what to do. He’s not here for money because all he wants is respect. Everything he has is due to his fans and he’s sticking with the WWF forever. Apparently Vince had no idea what Bret was going to say so his applause is very genuine. We see the roster watching in the back and only Austin seems upset at the news.
Now it’s time to get to the real story here though and that’s what happened after Wrestlemania XII. There are people who might think Shawn Michaels is a little bit better than him or even a little bit cuter. That might be true but Shawn will never be as tough or as smart as Bret. Bret is the best wrestler in the WWF today and at Survivor Series he’ll prove that when he faces Steve Austin. We go back to the locker room where Pillman is WAY too excited over that news, earning himself a glare from Austin.
So why is Bret back? There was a fan in Canada that got very sick in a hurry and there was a chance that he wasn’t going to make it through the night. Bret promised the kid that if he could make it through the night, he started feeling better, only to pass away soon thereafter. That was Bret’s nephew but he was going to come back anyway because he had made a promise. All that matters is that he’s back and he’s back for good. Really good stuff here and that nephew part was awesome.
And now, a Karate Fighters tournament.
Mr. Perfect vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley
Actually no as Perfect’s knee is too banged up and Gorilla Monsoon says this can’t happen. Instead Marc Mero is here and is willing to put the Intercontinental Title on the line against Helmsley RIGHT NOW.
Intercontinental Title: Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Marc Mero
Mero is defending and Perfect is on commentary. Marc grabs an armbar to start before dropkicking Helmsley out to the floor. Helmsley pulls Mero’s manager Sable into the way of a dive before the champ can die to really show how evil he can be at times. Back in and Helmsley takes over with a quick tilt-a-whirl backbreaker before the knee drop misses by a good six inches. Mero gets in a clothesline and we take a break.
Back with Marc hitting a slingshot legdrop and getting two off a top rope moonsault press. The referee gets bumped though and it’s time for a chair. Perfect goes in as well and takes it away, only to knock Mero cold instead, giving Helmsley the pin and the title in a big old swerve.
Rating: C+. The match wasn’t great but the angle was sweet and that’s all that mattered here. All of a sudden Helmsley looks like a brilliant heel and a much bigger deal instead of just some blue blooded snob with potential but nothing worth getting excited over. That’s what a good veteran heel rub can give you, but for some reason it almost never works.
Overall Rating: B. This is a show where you could feel the whole thing changing at around the halfway point. The first two matches were horrible and major wastes of time but after that the show jumps up about five levels in quality in a matter of seconds. You can feel things changing and that’s the best news the company could have heard at this point.
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In Your House #11 – Buried Alive: Who Needs The Title?
In Your House #11: Buried Alive Date: October 20, 1996
Location: Market Square Arena, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 9,649
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross
This is another of those shows where there just isn’t much to say. There are only five matches on the card and only two of them are worth much of anything. It’s always interesting to see a main event with the focus being something other than the world title feud and Undertaker vs. Foley would be going on for a lot longer after this. Let’s get to it.
Also of note: this is the first ever WWF pay per view with the reigning WWF World Champion not in action.
The opening video talks about Undertaker spending his life at war with Mankind and warns Mankind to enjoy his last breaths before he’s buried alive.
There’s a big mound of dirt with a tombstone next to an open grave.
Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Steve Austin
The first of many, many times and it’s heel vs. heel here. Before the match Austin says that he’s fine with fighting Helmsley since Savio Vega is injured tonight. Apparently Bret Hart is coming back to Raw and Austin hopes it’s to announce his retirement. Before we get to the match though, I should note JR is in full heel mode here, constantly ranting about how he won’t be silenced and how he’s the real voice of the WWF. The fact that the mics aren’t all working ticks him off even more.
Feeling out process to start with Helmsley armdragging Austin down. JR has his microphone changed as Austin goes to the floor to jaw with a fan. Back in and Austin armdrags Helmsley down and flips him off. The feeling out process continues as JR takes credit for Bret coming back while his mic cuts in and out. Austin gets tired of this slow paced stuff and slaps Helmsley in the face to speed things up a bit. Helmsley bails to the apron as we’re nearly five minutes into this match and we’ve had two armdrags and a slap to the face.
Back in and an elbow to the head puts Helmsley down and we hit an armbar from Austin. Helmsley fights up and pokes Austin in the eye as we’ve got a split screen of the match and the commentators for no apparent reason. Back to the armbar for a bit before Helmsley fights up and buries a knee into Austin’s ribs. A backdrop puts Austin down as Hunter has his first advantage. There’s a knee drop to the head for two and Helmsley is getting frustrated. The mics still aren’t working with JR cutting in and out on almost every other word.
We hit the chinlock on Austin and it’s back to the split screen for a few moments. Austin fights up and they trade sleeper holds until a jawbreaker puts Helmsley down for two. A Stun Gun (hot shot) gets two more for Austin but Helmsley hits a jumping knee to the face and a middle rope right hand for two. They clothesline each other down and here’s Mr. Perfect who will be facing Helmsley tomorrow night. Perfect comes to the ring to put his arm around Helmsley’s valet, allowing Austin to get in some cheap shots.
That’s not cool with Perfect either so Austin throws a soda at him, only to have Helmsley jump him from behind. Perfect leaves with the valet, which causes Helmsley to drop the Pedigree attempt. Austin goes after him but gets suplexed in the aisle to put both guys down. Helmsley is catapulted into the post and they head inside where the Stunner ends this in a hurry.
Rating: C+. This was more an historical anomaly than anything else as Helmsley was still slowly coming up the card and Austin was ready to move up the ladder. Still though, these two fighting each other is always worth a look. The JR stuff got old fast though as the constant breaks in commentary were distracting.
We recap the Smoking Gunns vs. Owen Hart/British Bulldog. There isn’t much to this one as the Gunns lost the titles last month and are having problems due to Sunny. She fired both of them after losing though so she won’t be a factor tonight.
Before the match Billy says they’ll get the titles back and Sunny will be back at their side. He doesn’t seem interested at sharing the glory with Bart though.
Tag Titles: Smoking Gunns vs. Owen Hart/British Bulldog
Billy starts with Owen and takes him down with a headlock. The microphone keeps cutting in and out as JR gets more and more annoyed. He manages to say Owen got a haircut. Lawler: “How analytical.” Billy goes up top but jumps into a punch to the ribs, giving the champions their first advantage. Bulldog comes in to crank on the arm as the announcers debate cowboys. Bart gets in a cheap shot to put Bulldog down. Sunny can be seen watching in the back.
Bart comes in legally but misses a high cross body, giving Bulldog two. Back to Owen for a missile dropkick and some headbutts in the corner for good measure. The champions put Bart down again with a double clothesline as JR rips into Vince for his obvious points on commentary. Owen drops a leg and puts on a chinlock and JR is now claiming a conspiracy by Vince. Bulldog distracts Billy by posing and Bart is whipped into the ropes, knocking his partner down to the floor.
Billy trips Owen down and accepts the tag from his brother like nothing happened. A double Russian legsweep gets two on Owen, followed by an elbow from Billy. There’s a neckbreaker dedicated to Sunny but she doesn’t seem all that interested. Back to Bart who breaks up a tag attempt as the Gunns continue to double team Owen. Bulldog is knocked off the apron but he sneaks back in to pull Bart down, breaking up the Sidewinder. Owen pops back up and hits a spinwheel kick to take out Billy for the pin to retain.
Rating: D+. This was again more storytelling than a match but no one thought the Gunns were going to get the belts back, nor did most people want them to. Owen and Bulldog were a much better team and the Gunns’ time was over. Not a bad match or anything, but it was all about the story instead of the match, which is fine in this case.
Bart leaves on his own.
Vince talks about Faarooq, a newcomer feuding with Ahmed Johnson, being attacked earlier but JR gets in the ring. Before he gets to the point, he says he won’t talk about Vince firing him and trying to ruin his life. Bret Hart will be in Fort Wayne, Indiana tomorrow night and it’s not because of Vince. It’s because JR went to South Africa to talk to him because JR loves the fans more than Vince. JR rants about Vince destroying the microphones (which the fans in the arena wouldn’t know about) and throws his mic to Vince before storming off.
Back to Faarooq, he says he’s ready for Ahmed no matter what. Johnson lost the Intercontinental Title because of Faarooq so Ahmed jumped him on the Free For All, injuring him.
Here’s Mr. Perfect to replace JR on commentary.
Intercontinental Title: Goldust vs. Marc Mero
Mero is champion after winning a tournament due to Ahmed being injured and therefore stripped of the title. Mero defeated Faarooq in the finals and this was supposed to be a rematch but Johnson prevented that from happening. Another feeling out process to start, complete with Goldust doing his big deep breath. Some armdrags and a hiptoss put Goldust down and we hit the armbar. Goldust fights up and pounds away in the corner before doing the same in the opposite corner.
Mero is tired of the beating and takes Goldust down to fire off right hands of his own. A backdrop sets up a clothesline and Goldust bails to the floor. The champion hits a BIG flip dive over the top to take Goldie out again and a slingshot legdrop gets two back inside. Mero goes up again but gets powerbombed down and sent to the floor. Back in and we hit the chinlock on the champion before a knee to the ribs puts Mero down again.
We hit another chinlock as Mero is in some trouble. The champion fights up again but gets clotheslined down. Goldust asks for a microphone, threatening to come into the crowd and stick his tongue down everyone’s throat if they keep booing him. Mero uses the distraction to take Goldust down and gets two off a spinning moonsault press. Goldust’s Curtain Call (reverse suplex) is countered into a rollup for two and we head to the floor again.
Mero is sent into the barricade and Perfect is tired of the referee doing nothing. He gets up and helps Marc back inside, drawing Helmsley back out for a showdown. Perfect drops Goldust with a right hand, allowing Mero to bring it back inside for a Samoan drop and the Wild Thing (Shooting Star Press) to retain.
Rating: C+. Mero was pretty awesome in the ring at this point and could fly with the best of them. He could also talk and had a good look, but somehow this was pretty much the peak of his career in the WWF. This was a fun match but cutting out a minute or two in the middle would have helped a lot. Still though, not bad and it even advanced Perfect vs. Helmsley for tomorrow.
We recap Sid vs. Vader, which is set up as a fight over who is the master of the powerbomb. This was supposed to be the main event of WCW’s Starrcade 1993 with the same story but a lot of problems prevented it from happening. Tonight it’s a result of Shawn vs. Camp Cornette as seen at the end of Mind Games when Sid saved Shawn from Vader.
Sycho Sid vs. Vader
The winner gets a world title shot at Survivor Series so Shawn comes out to do commentary. They slug it out to start with Sid knocking Vader down and dropping a leg for two. Sid pounds away in the corner but Vader blocks a slam with a right hand to the face. Now it’s Vader pounding Sid down in the corner before hitting a running splash. Sid falls to the floor and lays there for a very long time without getting counted out.
Back up and Sid pounds away from the apron before actually trying a sunset flip, only to have Vader sit down on his chest. Sid gets up again and a double clothesline puts both guys down one more time. Vader slugs him into the corner but a splash is broken up by a boot to the face. Sid goes up top but a cross body is caught in midair with a SCARY display of strength.
A slam and a splash get two for Vader and there’s a middle rope splash for the same, but this time Vader pulls Sid up before three. Instead he loads up the Vader Bomb but it lands on knees, allowing Sid to slam Vader down. He sets up the powerbomb but has to take care of Cornette. Another powerbomb attempt is countered by a Vader low blow. Now it’s Vader loading up the powerbomb, but he pulls out and punches Sid in the head, allowing Sid to grab a quick chokeslam for the pin and the title shot.
Rating: D. They kept this short which is the right idea, but the match was nothing all that great. There’s only so much you can do in a match like this and they pretty much firmly hit that ceiling. Also, shouldn’t there have been at least one powerbomb in a match built around who is the master of the powerbomb?
Shawn celebrates Sid on his win and nothing happens.
After a Survivor Series ad, JR horns in on a Sid interview and pesters Sid into saying he’ll do anything to beat Shawn.
We recap Mankind vs. Undertaker. Mankind jumped Undertaker on April 1 and laid him out like no one had in years if ever, triggering a months long feud. Eventually Paul Bearer turned on Undertaker to join Mankind, ending a six year partnership. Tonight Undertaker has vowed to bury Mankind alive.
Mankind vs. Undertaker
As mentioned there’s a big mound of dirt with an open grave in the middle. You win by dragging your opponent to the grave and covering them with dirt. The brawl is on to start as the arena is still full of smoke from Undertaker’s entrance. Mankind comes back with right hands in the corner, only to be grabbed by the throat and tossed in himself. Undertaker kicks him to the floor and into the barricade, setting up a HUGE dive off the top to send Mankind onto the concrete.
They brawl up the aisle (by brawl I mean Undertaker punches and Mankind stumbles) towards the grave site where Undertaker grabs a shovel. It takes too long though so Mankind tries a suplex, only to be caught in a small package of all things, sending them tumbling down the dirt. They fight back to ringside with Undertaker still firmly in control. Undertaker chokes Mankind with a microphone cord and they head into the crowd. More right hands have Mankind in trouble, including Undertaker diving over the barricade with a clothesline.
They head back inside where Old School is countered to give Mankind his first advantage. He chokes Undertaker down in the corner and blasts Taker with some kind of jagged object handed to him by Bearer. Undertaker comes back with a shot to the throat and takes away the object for a few shots of his own. A jumping clothesline puts Mankind down and Undertaker goes after Bearer. Mankind tries a chair shot but gets kicked in the ribs, only to have Paul blast Undertaker with the urn, allowing Mankind to hit Undertaker with the chair.
A running knee drives Undertaker’s head into the steps and they head up to the grave site again. Undertaker gets knocked into the grave but Mankind can only get in a few shovels full of dirt before getting pulled in as well. They fight out of the hole with Undertaker throwing Mankind off the dirt and down to the floor again. Back inside again with Mankind hitting a pulling piledriver and covering which means nothing here.
A double arm DDT onto the chair knocks Undertaker out but Mankind grabs the urn to rock back and forth. Undertaker sits up and CRACKS Mankind in the back with the chair before legdropping it down onto his face. Mankind comes back with a Stunner onto the top rope and peels back the mats on the floor. His piledriver is countered into a kind of backdrop onto the steps to put further destroy Mankind’s body.
The steps are brought inside and dropped onto Mankind’s back, setting up the Tombstone to knock him out cold. Undertaker carries Mankind to the grave site but on the way Mankind grabs the Mandible Claw to take over. It doesn’t last long though as Undertaker gets a quick chokeslam to send Mankind into the grave. The burial is quick and Undertaker wins.
Rating: B-. Good match here between two guys who could bring the brutality when they had the chance. Mankind was one of the only guys that could give Undertaker a run for his money and there were moments where he looked like he had a chance. It’s the best match of the show and that’s what a main event should be most of the time.
Undertaker keeps burying him and shoves the referees away when they try to stop him. Out of nowhere here’s a man in an executioner hood to blast Undertaker in the back of the head with a shovel. He gets Mankind out of the grave and throws Undertaker in instead. Thunder starts rumbling and the lights flicker as Mankind and the other guy bury Undertaker.
The lights straighten out as the grave fills up with dirt and here are Goldust and some other villains to help. This goes on for a good while until thunder rumbles some more and the shovel is stuck down in the dirt. Mankind and Bearer leave before a bolt of lightning hits the grave and Undertaker’s hand sticks out of the dirt to end the show.
Overall Rating: C. It’s not a great show but this is a really easy sit through with nothing being all that bad. The worst match is pretty easily Sid vs. Vader and that only runs about eight minutes. It’s interesting that the best show in awhile didn’t have Shawn in action which might have been a sign. There’s nothing great to see here but it’s definitely not a bad show and is one of the better entries in the series so far.
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Monday Night Raw – October 7, 1996: Halloween Comes Early
Monday Night Raw Date: October 7, 1996
Location: Hersheypark Arena, Hershey, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 3,923
Commentators: Kevin Kelly, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler
Things have picked up a bit since we left off about ten months ago. Shawn Michaels is now the reigning WWF World Champion and the company is in a nosedive with the NWO running roughshod over the wrestling world. We’re coming up on In Your House: Buried Alive, meaning it’s going to be a lot of Undertaker vs. Mankind. Let’s get to it.
The opening video previews tonight’s events, including Shawn and Vader, Goldust vs. Sid and an interview with the REAL Double J (oh yeah that thing).
Opening sequence.
Mark Mero vs. Fake Diesel
Mero’s Intercontinental Title isn’t on the line. Jim Ross comes out with Diesel here as this stupid angle continues. For those of you not around at the time, the idea here was that JR turned heel (just go with it) and said he was the reason Diesel and Razor Ramon were around in the first place so he was bringing them back.
Now this could have been a good dig at WCW if the WWF was going with the idea that it was the WWF who created the characters and the people didn’t matter, but instead they were acting like these were the real people, thereby making JR look stupid. It didn’t help that Fake Razor looked like he was in a Razor Halloween costume. Fake Diesel on the other hand looked a lot like Diesel, at least if you didn’t get a good shot of his face. You would know Fake Diesel better as Kane.
Diesel charges into a boot in the corner to start and a dropkick puts him on the floor for a no hands dive. Back in and Diesel drops him throat first across the top rope to take over and slow things WAY down. The slow beating continues and we go to Fake Razor and WOW it’s even worse than I remember. His Cuban accent is as good as Lana’s Russian and thankfully we go to a break without having to listen to much more. Back with Mero rolling Diesel up for two and Razor coming out to watch. Mero dives onto Razor, which is probably the best thing he’s done all night. Ramon comes in for the DQ a few seconds later.
Rating: D. Mero and Diesel were actually having a half decent match but my goodness this has to be one of the dumbest stories I’ve ever seen. It’s not funny, it’s not clever, THEY DON’T EVEN LOOK LIKE THE PEOPLE THEY’RE SUPPOSED TO BE and the matches aren’t that good. Oh and stop trying to make JR a heel. It’s stupid.
The beating continues post match.
Undertaker has dug a grave for Mankind.
You can get a denim shirt with Bret, Undertaker or Shawn on the back for FORTY NINE BUCKS EACH. Sweet goodness no wonder I’ve never seen anyone wearing one of those things.
Mr. Perfect will be back in two weeks. Well kind of but not as they’re implying.
New Rockers vs. Smoking Gunns
I still can’t believe the Gunns were a thing in late 1996. Sunny has left the Gunns due to them losing the Tag Team Titles so they’re definitely on their last legs. With the Gunns in the ring, we go to pre-recorded comments from the two of them, saying they want the titles back so they can get Sunny with them. Sunny calls in to the show and isn’t happy that Ahmed Johnson will be on Livewire with her on Saturday.
Billy and Cassady (Leif Cassady, better known as Al Snow which I’m sure we’ve covered before) start things off as Sunny brags about how awesome she is and lists off the Livewire fax and e-mail contact information. Bart and Marty come in as Kelly apologizes for not calling the first two and a half minutes of the match. It’s not like anything was happening but it wasn’t the nicest thing in the world. Marty gets two off a small package and it’s time for JR to go on a rant about how much he hates Vince McMahon.
Bart gets punched down by Cassady (Marty was in there too but his punch didn’t make anything close to contact so I’m not counting him) and Leif plants him with a swinging Rock Bottom. Billy finally does something by kneeing Marty from the apron as the crowd is just silent. A low bridge sends the now legal Billy out to the floor and it’s Leif cleaning house with right hands. Billy makes a blind tag though and the Sidewinder puts Cassady away.
Rating: D. Long, slow and boring here which is one of the worst combinations you can have in a match. The tag division was such a mess around this time and it would take years to improve, oddly enough with Billy Gunn as one half of the least likely tag teams in wrestling history. But yeah, bad stuff here.
We recap the REAL Double J angle which involved Jeff Jarrett pretending to sing his big song With My Baby Tonight when it was really the Roadie singing the whole time. Both guys left for over a year and are finally back to reignite the feud. Of note here, as Roadie talks about everything that’s happened, Jim Johnston is seen next to him and is even mentioned by name. We see Jammes (Yes Jammes, not James.) accidentally tripping Jeff to cost him the Intercontinental Title, which was his last appearance for a long time. We’ll get more next week, even if Jarrett would be WCW by the end of the month.
Goldust isn’t worried about Sid.
Livewire ad, complete with the yet to be named Vince Russo in the background.
JR brings out Jim Cornette and Vader for a chat. Vader gets to face Sid at Buried Alive in a #1 contenders match but Cornette has no idea why that’s necessary when he’s beaten Shawn four times since July, including last week. Very fair point but Vader will be fine with beating Sid again.
Ad for the Hall of Fame/Survivor Series.
The Sultan vs. Aldo Montoya
Sultan has Bob Backlund and Iron Sheik in his corner with the former sitting in on commentary. Aldo speeds things up as Bob says he can’t hear without his glasses on. A suplex drops Montoya as Backlund is on an anti-drug rant. Sultan whips him hard into the buckle and a German suplex gets one. The camel clutch makes Montoya give up.
Rating: D-. Just a squash here but the commentary was dominating everything with Backlund doing his ranting and JR talking about being vice president with twelve names signed under his watch. Sultan clearly wasn’t going to go anywhere but it was an interesting idea to give him two famous managers like this.
Mankind gets in the grave but doesn’t want to be buried alive.
Goldust vs. Sycho Sid
Goldust jumps Sid from behind as JR is still babbling on about how much he hates Vince. Sid comes right back with an atomic drop and a clothesline as Shawn Michaels calls in to say he’ll have to be more than resilient to beat Sid or Vader. Goldust drops Sid across the top rope and stomps away as Shawn starts swearing a bit too much. Cue Jim Cornette as we take a break. Back with Sid hitting the chokeslam and powerbomb for the pin. There was no need for that commercial.
Rating: D-. This only existed to have Shawn call in, which wasn’t exactly thrilling stuff. It’s a boring match with two guys who weren’t exactly thrilling around this time and it was clear that things needed to change. You can only get so far with Goldust being a toned down version of what made him great and he had long since hit that wall.
Post match Vader comes out to beat on Sid, who no sells a middle rope splash and hits a chokeslam to end the show.
Overall Rating: F. This was absolutely horrible and one of the worst episodes of the show I’ve ever seen. They were obviously running out of ideas here and there was almost no reason for them to keep going in this direction, especially with WCW killing them the way they were. At some point you have to put on something interesting and that’s just not what was happening here.
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Monday Night Raw – March 20, 1995: Sweet Goodness 1995 Was Bad
Monday Night Raw Date: March 20, 1995
Location: Memorial Civic Auditorium, Stockton, California
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jim Cornette
There are less than two weeks to go before Wrestlemania and that means it’s time to really crank up the football talk. Ignore the fact that it’s not the most exciting story in the world because there are CELEBRITIES involved and that makes up for any lack of interest, talent or care whatsoever. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Razor Ramon vs. Henry Godwinn
This is still during Henry’s heel push which went as far as the evil hog farmer character was going to take him. Razor starts in on the arm as we hear something about his contract issues. A wheelbarrow slam plants Razor and Cornette continues to amaze me by never being able to shut up. He goes from insulting Steve McMichael to talking about Ernie Ladd to hyping up the Tag Team Title match to doing color on this match in the span of two minutes.
Henry chokes on the ropes a bit and we hit the neck crank as Cornette goes on a mini rant about Jim Ross reporting on everything. We take a break and come back with Razor scoring with some right hands. A bad looking middle rope bulldog (more a cross body to the back) gets two on Henry but here’s the Roadie for a distraction. The 1-2-3 Kid comes out to kick Roadie in the face and for some reason Henry is distracted as well, allowing Razor to hit the Edge for the pin.
Rating: D. This was too long with Godwinn not being anything worth watching other than a big strong man and Razor being way off his game for some reason. The interference was a good call but Razor and the Kid were really getting tiresome at this point as they were almost glued together at the hip.
Post match Razor is ticked off at Backlund getting a title shot on some upcoming Sunday night special. Razor wants to know what happens if Backlund wins the title and goes to Wrestlemania to defend against Bret so he basically promises to interfere in the match.
Just in case you have no idea what’s going on here, we see Backlund signing the contract last week.
Also on that Sunday night show, Lex Luger will face Tatanka in a cage match.
Jim Cornette leaves commentary to get ready for the Tag Team Title match.
Fan Festival ad.
Lawrence Taylor says he’s scared of snakes and alligators but he doesn’t see those things in Bigelow.
Yesterday on Action Zone, Bigelow shoulder blocked Doink like a football player.
Steve McMichael replaces Cornette on commentary.
King Kong Bundy vs. Raven Clarke/Adam Croomes
Bundy slams the jobbers together and the camera keeps cutting to the announcers instead. This just keeps going for awhile and an Avalanche ends Croomes.
Post destruction, here’s Kama to get in a brawl with McMichael.
Wrestlemania Report with a few nothing interviews that fill in some time.
Tag Team Titles; Smoking Gunns vs. Heavenly Bodies
The Bodies (Jimmy Del Ray and Tom Prichard, basically another attempt to recreate the Midnight Express) are challenging and have Cornette in their corner, leaving Vince alone on commentary. Billy has bad ribs coming in but starts with Tom anyway. Cornette yells at Del Ray for some reason, leaving Tom to get chopped by Bart.
Back to Billy for an armbar before Bart elbows Del Ray in the jaw. We take a break and come back with Tom holding Bart in a front facelock. Billy accidentally distracts the referee to break up a tag as this match just keeps going. A double clothesline drops Bart as the fans are trying to find ANYTHING to care about in this thing. In case the match wasn’t boring enough yet, Prichard puts on a reverse chinlock.
Del Ray misses a top rope splash but we need a double clothesline before the hot tag can bring in Billy. A modified Sidewinder looks to finish Tom but Del Ray comes in off the top and puts…..no one into a cover for some reason. Billy grabs a backslide for the pin to retain the titles.
Rating: D+. Technically the match was certainly acceptable but there’s just no interest in watching these teams fight. Neither team has a personality between them and it was clearly just a Rock N Roll Express vs. Midnight Express knockoff without anything that made those matches work. Well, save for Cornette of course.
We see clips from a charity auction last night with Undertaker signing autographs. That’s always weird to see.
Vince and Cornette preview the Sunday Night Slam (Sunday special) to end the show.
Actually not quite as Tatanka is ready for Luger in a cage next week to really end the show.
Overall Rating: D. Really not much to this one either as we’re heading straight for Wrestlemania with every single boring story they can cram in there along the way. The long tag match at the end didn’t help things either as it really didn’t set up the title defense at Wrestlemania. To be fair though that would imply something is more important than the football match and that’s just not true. There was very little sarcasm in that last sentence if that wasn’t clear.
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Monday Night Raw – November 1, 1993: Bobby Heenan Deserves Better
Monday Night Raw Date: November 1, 1993
Location: Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie, New York
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan
It’s another fresh month as we’re getting closer to the Survivor Series. Unfortunately it’s late 1993 and that means we’re in for some very hit and miss shows but we’re also in for a confusing few weeks as the main event is sorted out. It’s a dark time for the creative direction of the company so let’s get this over with. Let’s get to it.
Bobby Heenan finds Bastion Booger eating a bunch of food. Heenan: “None of this food is….” Booger: “IT’S RAW!”
Opening sequence.
Bastion Booger vs. Razor Ramon
Non-title. Booger is just embarrassingly fat here. The toothpick throw gets us going and Razor easily puts him up against the ropes for a soft slap to the chest. We take an early break and come back with Booger getting two off a splash and Heenan admitting that it’s his birthday. For some reason this stuns Vince as Razor ties Booger in the ropes for a……belly rub?
They head outside with Booger actually hitting the splash against the post. A bearhug goes nowhere so Booger starts slowly hammering away. Booger gets two off a World’s Strongest Slam as Heenan suggests Bastion could use the title as a tray at his birthday party. Another bearhug just seems to annoy Razor so he gets out and slams the big man. The Razor’s Edge is laughable at best so Booger sits on Razor’s chest and gets sunset flipped to give Ramon the pin.
Rating: D. Yeah this was horrible but what else were you expecting from someone as worthless as Booger? He was huge, he wasn’t anything worth seeing in the ring and his gimmick was that he was fat and gross. Razor is an incredible talent but he can’t do anything with someone like that.
Here’s a Survivor Series report, including a preview of a boxing match between Riddick Bowe and Evander Holyfield II. After that cross promotion, we hear the current main event lineup: the All Americans (Lex Luger/Tatanka/Steiner Brothers) vs. the Foreign Fanatics (Yokozuna/Quebecers/Ludvig Borga) but this weekend, the Fanatics beat Tatanka down and cost him his first ever pinfall loss in about two years. Luger tried to make the save (and to high five fans while jogging down to help his partner) but was stopped by one of the Quebecers.
Back in the arena, the Foreign Fanatics are in the ring for a chat. Cornette keeps laughing about how “Tatanto” is out of the Survivor Series where it’s all about surviving. Jim goes on a rant about all the possibilities the Survivor Series could see before Quebecers’ manager Johnny Polo talks about a team of anthropologists coming up from Bora Bora to see this kind of stupidity in person.
Borga says Scott Steiner’s American dream will never come true next week when he takes Scott out personally. Cornette wraps it up by saying that just like in Ten Little Indians, there will be none at the end of Survivor Series. Heenan: “And they’re all coming to my birthday party!”
Mr. Perfect vs. The Executioner
Executioner is your standard masked man. Some chops have Executioner in trouble but he whips Perfect into the corner. That’s about it for the jobber offense though as Perfect avoids a corner charge and kicks him in the ribs. We hit a leg lock on Executioner, followed by a spinning toehold to slow things down even more. This goes on WAY too long with Perfect pulling on the leg as Heenan suggests that his birthday be made a national holiday. The PerfectPlex gives him the pin to finally wrap this up.
Rating: D. WAY too long here despite it not even being four minutes long. This was a bunch of waiting around while Perfect worked on the leg which went nowhere, only to have the PerfectPlex end it a few seconds later. I’m not sure what was up with Perfect here but it got really old in a hurry.
Jeff Jarrett is in Nashville and complains about the politics in country music holding him back. He’s sick of seeing Billy Ray Cyrus with his buggy whip arms getting so much exposure. Jeff is ready to face people like Razor Ramon, Men on a Mission and the 1-2-3 Kid. This gimmick was dead on sight and I think everyone knew it.
Well Dunn vs. Smoking Gunns
Well and Dunn have purple thongs over their black singlets. Normally I would say that would tell you everything you need to know about them, but their names are Well and Dunn. Billy jumps over Dunn to start and punches him to the face as Heenan says Harvey Wippleman will be at his birthday party.
Some armdrags put Well down and we hit the armbar as this dead show keeps going. A suplex/high cross body combo gets two but Well snaps Bart’s throat across the top rope to take over. We hit the chinlock on Bart to kill even more time before Well tags out to Dunn for another chinlock. Back up and the hot tag brings in Billy for a running clothesline. Harvey trips him up though…..and they actually end this on a DQ after over seven minutes.
Rating: D-. Well Dunn vs. the Smoking Gunns just went to a DQ in nearly eight minutes. This was one of the worst matches I’ve seen in a very long time and I have no idea who thought this was something that needed to air on national TV. Horrible stuff here that just kept going and made an awful show even worse.
Randy Savage calls in to say he’ll be back to take care of Crush. Heenan makes fun of Savage’s voice because he’s a bit insane.
Adam Bomb vs. Virgil
Your main event people. They stare at each other to start until Virgil gets two off a cross body (though it looked like Bomb was supposed to catch him). That means it’s time for Adam to have a meeting on the floor with Wippleman, who Virgil chases around for fun. Back in and Virgil dives over the top but somehow winds up under Bomb. They head inside again with Adam hitting him in the head and slowly working Virgil over, only to miss a charge in the corner. Virgil scores with a dropkick but his cross body bounces off Bomb in what looks like another botch. The Adam Smasher (powerbomb) puts Virgil away.
Rating: D+. Who would have guessed that Virgil vs. Adam Bomb would somehow be the match of the night? Virgil actually tried in this one and got in some good offense, but when your opponent can’t figure out how to take a cross body, there’s only so much you can do. Bomb would get MUCH better after turning face but this was a hard one to sit through.
Heenan starts singing Happy Birthday to end the show.
Overall Rating: F. Holy sweet lederhosen this was a horrid show. The stuff for Survivor Series wasn’t bad but with this being the last episode of a TV taping, they basically threw whatever last talent they had out there to fill in some time. Just a dreadful show here, which really is the theme of this era.
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