Impact Wrestling
Date: April 11, 2024
Location: 2300 Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

There have been some rather good wrestling matches around here lately and that has been great to see. This time around isn’t going to have anything to do with that, as the main event is a Monster’s Ball match between PCO and Kon. That should be enough to carry things but we also have just over a week before Rebellion. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We are joined in the arena with Hammerstone brawling with Josh Alexander. Security tries to break it up but Alexander hits the big flip dive onto everyone. Cue Tommy Dreamer to be the voice of reason and he actually manages to get the bleeding Alexander to leave. Dreamer gets in the ring and talks to Hammerstone about how Alexander is the face of this company.

Dreamer is the reason Hammerstone is here and now Hammerstone is taking a shortcut. Hammerstone doesn’t need to go down that path because his legacy is not set yet. The fans chant ECW at Dreamer because it’s his legacy, so go have the best match at Rebellion and tell everyone to top that. Dreamer tells the fans that this will be a great show and goes to leave, only to be jumped by Hammerstone. Alexander runs back in for the save before saying the match at Rebellion will be Last Man Standing. Good way to go, as seeing Dreamer in pain is always fun.

Opening sequence.

We run down the card.

Digital Media Title: Laredo Kid vs. Crazzy Steve

Steve is defending and goes right for the mask. Kid lunges at him and Steve knocks him into the corner to take over. A springboard something is broken up, with Steve nailing a clothesline to the back of the head. The neck crank goes on, with Steve switching it into something like an Octopus hold on the mat. Kid fights up and knocks him into the corner to start the comeback, setting up a pair of moonsaults. The top rope version is broken up and Steve pulls him down to start with the stomping. Steve goes for the mask again so Kid jumps him. The referee tries to break it up and gets shoved down, with Kid getting DQ’d at 8:34.

Rating: C. I continue to be confused by Laredo Kid, who feels like he should be a big star but he never actually wins anything. That was the case again here, but odds are we are going to be seeing this match again. At some point Kid needs to win a title of some kind and he seems to be potentially having another chance soon.

Alex Shelley apologizes to Chris Sabin and Kushida, who seem cool with things.

ABC vs. First Class

Austin grabs a headlock on Francis to start and is powered into the corner for his efforts. Swann comes in but Austin trips him down for a kick to the back. It’s off to Bey for a double dropkick but Francis gets in a cheap shot as we take a break. Back with Austin still in trouble as everything breaks down. Francis hits his world’s strongest slam/fireman’s carry drop on both of the ABC (that’s nuts) to take over. We settle down to a double kick to Swann, followed by a big flip dive to Francis on the floor. The 1-2-Sweet is broken up though and Swann grabs a rollup with tights for the pin at 11:02.

Rating: C+. ABC is a team who can work well with anyone but it was cool to see Swann and Francis working well together. Francis might not be the biggest star in the world but he is getting somewhere with this new stuff. The power/speed team works for First Class and they can be annoying enough to back it up. Not bad, assuming they can keep it going.

Post match here is Joe Hendry to explain the problem with First Class. This results in a slightly changed version of the Fresh Prince Of Bel Air theme, including Francis being called a fat Uncle Phil. At Rebellion, it’s Hendry vs. Swann.

Ash By Elegance and her handler think Ash should get the Knockouts Title shot at Rebellion because Steph de Lander was filling in for her. No.

Mustafa Ali complains to the Grizzled Young Veterans about Jake Something getting an X-Division Title shot. Something comes in to say the match is happening.

It’s time for the contract signing between Jordynne Grace and Steph de Lander, with Santino Marella running things. Cue de Lander, with Matt “Qdoba” and Grace, with Cardona hyping de Lander up. De Lander signs but Grace says she’s not laying down that easily. Grace lists off her resume, with Cardona bringing up that he beat her for the Digital Media Title. Grace asks if de Lander is going to say anything or just let Cardona talk for her.

De Lander says her resume is too long to list and thinks Grace is too focused on other things. Like the Royal Rumble! With that odd reference to a one off match two and a half months ago, Grace talks about how she’s beaten Cardona, de Lander and Cardona’s wife. Grace: “I’m the juggernaut b****.” Cardona: “DON’T YOU TALK TO HER LIKE THAT!” Grace: “I wasn’t talking to her, b****.” With that, Grace signs and the brawl is on, with Cardona getting in a cheap shot. De Lander chokeslams Grace through the table. Of all the contract signings I’ve seen in wrestling, this was the most recent.

The System interrupts Masha Slamovich and ask her about teaming with Alicia Edwards again. Masha answers in Russian and no one knows what that means.

Jonathan Gresham is still in group therapy and talks about wearing three different masks. One of them is never seen, with the group leader saying that’s the truest reflection of who he is. We see the octopus mask, with a voice talking about seeing a tree and being told to cut it down.

Moose vs. Trent Seven

Non-title and the System is here with Moose, while Mike bailey is here to counter them. Seven fires off chops in the corner to start and is promptly release Rock Bottomed down. Some hard whips into the corner have Seven in more trouble but he chops his way to freedom. A DDT plants Moose again and Bailey cuts off Eddie Edwards’ interference. Bop and Bang puts Moose down but he escapes the Birminghammer. The spear finishes Seven at 3:55.

Rating: C+. They kept this moving and that’s what it should have been. Moose is on his way to a huge title match next week and there is no reason to have him get into a long match here against Seven. It was far from a squash and they did a nice job of making Seven look good in short order.

Post match the beatdown is on but Time Machine makes the save.

Post break the System yells at Santino Marella, who makes the System vs. the Motor City Machine Guns for the Tag Team Titles next week. The winners of that face Speedball Mountain at Rebellion. With all of those people gone, Decay comes in to say they want their rematch for the Knockouts Tag Team Titles at Rebellion. Works as well.

Jake Something vs. James Drake

Zack Gibson is here too. Something powers Drake into the corner to start but Gibson gets in a cheap shot to take over. The chinlock goes on but Something fights up with a hard forearm. Gibson offers another distraction though, allowing Drake to hit a running dropkick in the corner. Cue Deaner to cut off Gibson so Something can hit Into The Void for the pin at 3:52.

Rating: C. They didn’t have much time here but Something setting the win on the way to the title match is what matters most. At the same time they kept Deaner vs. the Grizzled Young Veterans going, though I’m not sure where they’re heading with that. Not a great match here, but an efficient one.

Post match Mustafa Ali comes out to rant about how the X-Division need limits and Something defies those limits. Something goes after him but the Grizzled Young Veterans make the save. Deaner’s save attempt is broken up as well and the villains stand tall.

Kon vs. PCO

Monster’s Ball, meaning street fight/anything goes. PCO grabs the kendo stick so Kon uses a chair as a shield in a smart move. With Kon sent outside, PCO loads up a dive but gets knocked out of the air with a trashcan. We take a break and come back with PCO in a trashcan so Kon can beat on him with a chain. A table is set up at ringside but PCO fights back and puts Kon on it, setting up the big flip dive from the top.

Back in and Kon gets in some more shots but goes up top, allowing PCO to knock him through another table at ringside. That’s not enough to keep Kon down either, as he gets up and sends PCO face first into a bridged ladder. An Iconoclasm sends PCO through the ladder and now it’s time for thumbtacks. Kon puts the tacks into PCO’s mouth, which just wakes him up for a chokeslam onto the tacks. The PCOsault onto Kon onto the tacks finishes for PCO at 14:15.

Rating: B-. Sometimes you need to have two people beat the fire out of each other to blow off a feud and that is what they did here. It was a good way to wreck Kon for good, though he’ll be fine in a bodyguard role sooner than later. Good main event here as it felt like a clash of the titans, though PCO needs to do something fresh rather soon.

Overall Rating: C+. Good enough show here with the main event being the highlight. It was a show that added a few things to Rebellion while also cranking up some of the matches that were already made for the pay per view. In other words it was another efficient Impact, which is where they tend to shine.

Results
Crazzy Steve b. Laredo Kid via DQ when Kid shoved the referee
First Class b. ABC – Rollup with tights to Bey
Moose b. Trent Seven – Spear
PCO b. Kon – PCOsault

 

 

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Impact Wrestling
Date: April 4, 2024
Location: 2300 Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Matthew Rehwold, Tom Hannifan

We are just a few weeks away from Rebellion and the card is starting to come together. At the same time though, the Motor City Machine Guns are not having the best times as of late and the question becomes where they go from here. That every well could be down but we might see some more of it this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Mustafa Ali vs. Rhino

Non-title and this is Old School Rules, meaning anything goes. Rhino starts fast by sending him outside before going with the more simple beating back inside. Ali is backdropped out to the floor as commentary debates what a real X-Division star is. A hard whip sends Ali into the post so it’s time for the weapons, with the ECW chants beginning. Rehwoldt: “IT’S BEEN TWENTY YEARS!” Twenty three actually but who’s counting? Ali fights back and grabs the book of a former Philadelphia Flyer, who happens to be in the front row.

Instead Ali grabs a cardboard cutout of his Pro Wrestling Illustrated cover, allowing Rhino to fight back. After rescuing the book (and posing with its author), Rhino goes back inside but gets caught with a Coast To Coast. For some reason Ali tries his own Gore but is cut off with a trashcan. The fans want tables, though they have to settle for the one that Rhino sets up in the corner. A spinebuster puts Ali down again but his security cut off the Gore. Rhino fights them off and the Gore…hits the table to give Ali the pin at 8:34.

Rating: C+. There is a formula to these matches and they followed it just fine, which is all it needed to be. The fans are always going to respond to the ECW stuff and Rhino can still have a perfectly acceptable match. This worked out well and I had a good time with the whole thing, so nice choice for an opener.

Post match Jake Something comes in and lays Ali out.

People are excited for Alex Shelley vs. Nic Nemeth tonight.

Here is Hammerstone for a chat. He’s down for one more match with Josh Alexander and they can do it at Rebellion. Then he beats up a cameraman and puts Alexander’s headgear on him.

Here are the Rascalz, with Trey Miguel running down various ECW legends that he can’t remember. Bring out some ECW guys right now.

Rascalz vs. FBI

Make that the NEW FBI, with Zack Clayton and Ray Jazz (?), as managed by Little Guido. Jazz, an All-American wrestler, takes Miguel down to start but Miguel sends him into the buckle. Wentz comes in so the Rascalz can kick him down, setting up a quick shooting star press for two. Jazz fights his way out of trouble rather quickly and it’s off to Clayton to clean house. Everything breaks down and cue Myron Reed to spray paint Guido. That’s enough for the Rascalz to hit a quick backbreaker into a middle rope elbow for the pin on Jazz at 3:21.

Rating: C. Major points for having a fresh team using the old ECW name instead of having the same old guys come out for one more ECW reunion. It wasn’t a great performance or anything but at least they did something new. Guido is fine as the manager to tie things back to the old days, but they didn’t go with the expected idea here and I’ll certainly take that.

More wrestlers are excited for Alex Shelley vs. Nic Nemeth.

Jonathan Gresham is at his group therapy session, where he says you have to lie to get people to listen to him. The group’s therapist says lying is over.

Trent Seven is cut off by the System and gets a non-title match with Moose as a result.

Chris Bey vs. Frankie Kazarian

Ace Austin is here with Bey. The bell rings and Kazarian insists that he be recognized as the King of TNA. Bey uses the distraction to jump Kazarian from behind (the bell had rung so that’s hardly cheating) and an elbow to the back gets two. Kazarian pulls him down from the middle rope for a crash and sends things outside as we take a break.

Back with Bey slugging away against the ropes and hitting a spinebuster for two. Kazarian can’t hit the slingshot DDT but Bey’s connects for two more. The Art of Finesse misses though and the slingshot cutter gives Kazarian two more. They go to the floor where Kazarian grabs a chain, which Austin takes away. Kazarian pretends to get decked with it so Austin gets tossed, only for Bey to hit a quick dive. A low blow on the way back in drops Bey though and Fade To Black finishes Bey at 12:02.

Rating: B-. TNA has long figured out the value of putting two good wrestlers in the ring and letting them have a match with some time. There was almost no way these two weren’t going to do something at least decent and that’s what we got here. Nice match as Kazarian gets another win and the ABC doesn’t do so well on their own.

MK Ultra have been having issues in recent matches.

Masha Slamovich isn’t happy when Alisha Edwards cuts her off. Killer Kelly is gone and they both want the Knockouts Tag Team Titles so they could be a team. Masha can think about it.

More people are still excited about Alex Shelley vs. Nic Nemeth.

Kon is ready for PCO in Monster’s Ball.

Xia Brookside vs. Ash By Elegance

They argue to start with Brookside chasing her to the ropes early on. Brookside grabs a hurricanrana out of the corner and it’s already time for a breather on the floor. A distraction from the concierge lets Ash get in a posting to take over and they head back inside. Stomping in the corner gives Ash two but Brookside is back up with a crossbody for the same.

Ash is back up and sends her outside for a crash, only to have Rarefied Air broken up back inside. The Brooksie Bomb is broken up as well but Brookside makes the comeback anyway. A ram into the corner and a neckbreaker get two on Ash, meaning it’s time for the concierge to throw champagne in Brookside’s face. That and a rollup give Ash the pin at 8:28.

Rating: C. Ash is already more interesting than Dana Brooke was for a very long time and that was the case again here. You can see the character rounding into form as the weeks go by and it wouldn’t surprise me to see her getting into the title scene sooner than later. Not a great match or anything, but it suited Ash well.

The ABC aren’t happy with each other but First Class interrupts. They seem to recruit Chris Bey, who isn’t interested in that but is interested in beating up First Class soon. Deal.

We look at Steph De Lander becoming the new #1 contender to the Knockouts Title, albeit with an assist from Matt Cardona.

Cardona and De Lander are ready to win the Knockouts Title.

Nic Nemeth vs. Alex Shelley

This is billed as the Generational Class. They go to the mat to start with Nemeth grabbing a bodyscissors as commentary goes through their accolades. The threat of a cross armbreaker sends Nemeth over to the ropes and it’s time to go back to the mat. Shelley kicks the arm away to take over and the arm goes into the post to make it worse.

We take a break and come back with Shelley hitting a baseball slide before driving the knee into the arm. A cross arm choke with a backbreaker has Nemeth down again and Shelley sends him back to the floor. Nemeth manages to counter a ram into the post though and we take a break. Back with Nemeth in control on the mat and starting away on the arm to even it up a bit.

The dropkick cuts off Shelley’s comeback attempt but Shelley goes after the leg to put Nemeth down again. Shelley twists the leg around in the corner and we hit the Figure Four. Nemeth makes the rope and enziguris his way to a needed breather. A neckbreaker sets up the rapid fire elbows but the jumping version hits raised knee.

There’s a Downward Spiral into the middle buckle, setting up a tornado DDT for two. The Border City Stretch stays on Nemeth’s arm but Nemeth makes the rope again. Back up and Nemeth hits a running DDT for two, followed by a superkick for the same. The Border City Stretch is blocked so Shelley tries Shell Shock, which is reversed into the Danger Zone to give Nemeth the pin at 24:56.

Rating: B+. Remember the Kazarian vs. Bey match being good because the people involved are that good? That was the case again here but on a bigger scale. These two had a long match that was given the chance to be built up as Shelley loses, just like Chris Sabin did last week. It seems that TNA is moving forward and that may well be a good thing, though it’s still weird to see the Guns losing like this.

Overall Rating: B. There was a nice mixture of solid wrestling and quick stuff to set up future shows and that is a nice way to go. While the Scott D’Amore firing still feels rather unnecessary, the company is still rolling along with good television. That was the case again here and it went rather well with one of the better shows they’ve done in a bit.

Results
Musafa Ali b. Rhino – Pin after a missed Gore
Rascalz b. FBI – Backbreaker/middle rope combination to Jazz (3:21)
Frankie Kazarian b. Chris Bey – Fade To Black
Ash By Elegance b. Xia Brookside – Rollup
Nic Nemeth b. Alex Shelley – Danger Zone

 

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Ring Of Honor
Date: May 4, 2023
Location: FLA Live Arena, Sunrise, Florida
Commentators: Ian Riccaboni, Caprice Coleman, Nigel McGuinness

The shakeup of this show continues as there was no Dark or Dark: Elevation this week, meaning those shows’ futures might be in question. That could certainly change the way this show is presented and I’m not sure what that is going to mean. For now though, we should be in for something interesting as the show tends to be good. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Lee Moriarty vs. Rocky Romero

Pure Rules and Big Bill is here with Moriarty. Romero goes straight for an armbar and Moriarty has to use his first rope break. A hammerlock doesn’t work for Romero so he grabs a flying mare to stagger Moriarty instead. Romero goes right back to the arm so Moriarty goes for the second rope break. This time though he ties Romero’s arm in the ropes and elbows him in the head to take over.

Back up and Romero punches him in the face, which is enough for the official warning. Romero kicks the legs out to take over and a springboard tornado DDT plants Moriarty again. The cross armbreaker has Moriarty using his final rope break so it’s the standing Sliced Bread to give Romero two more. Romero tries it again gets countered into a suplex DDT for two. The cross armbreaker goes on again and since the rope won’t save him, Moriarty taps at 9:28.

Rating: C+. The Pure Rules only played so much of a role here, as Romero kept getting the same hold until Moriarty tapped. One thing that does help is that Big Bill was little more than a distraction for the most part. Romero isn’t likely to become a big star around here, but he should be able to beat Moriarty, who is talented but means little in AEW.

Athena vs. Angelica Risk

Proving Ground, meaning Risk gets a title shot for winning or going to a time limit draw. Athena kicks her down and dances to start, followed by a wheelbarrow faceplant. Risk gets in a few forearms but only earns herself a chinlock with a knee in the back. Athena stops to yell at the referee and gets enziguried for her efforts. A 619 looks to set up a high crossbody but Athena pulls her out of the air. Some rolling Wastelands set up a Gory Bomb spun onto the knees. Athena grabs a crossface for the tap at 5:09.

Rating: C+. Athena is getting a lot better at this destruction stuff and it’s fun to see her slaughtering people. The problem with having her be around this often while being this good though is the risk of turning her face, as the fans are going to get more impressed with her. Skye Blue seems to be the next big challenger and that could go rather well.

Post match Athena hits Skye Blue’s Skyfall onto the title.

TV Title: Samoa Joe vs. Christopher Daniels

Joe is defending in a rematch from a few weeks back. Daniels grabs a headlock and gets absolutely nowhere. Joe hammers him down with right hands in the corner and we hit the nerve hold. Back up and Daniels fires off some forearms, only to get run over again. Daniels manages a middle rope swinging Downward Spiral for two but Joe isn’t having anything of the Angel’s Wings. Instead he sends Daniels into the corner and hits the MuscleBuster to retain at 5:51.

Rating: C+. It was fine enough while it lasted, but there wasn’t much drama in Daniels as the challenger. Not only is he not someone who is going to be a threat to the title, but Joe has been pretty much a wrecking ball in ROH. The problem is that he has kind of floated around though, as aside from Mark Briscoe, it feels like it has been months since he had a serious challenger for the title.

Ring Of Honor World Title: Claudio Castagnoli vs. Robbie Eagles

Castagnoli is defending. Eagles snaps off a running hurricanrana to start and then wins a strike off. That’s fine with Castagnoli, who goes to the eyes and stomps away in the corner. The armbar goes on but Eagles fights up and starts in on the knee. A springboard missile dropkick staggers Castagnoli and a 619 to the knee drops him in the corner.

Some running knees in the corner give Eagles two and the Eagle Lock (something like a reverse Figure our) sends Castagnoli to the floor. The standing shooting star press gives Eagles two but he charges into a Michinoku Driver for two of his own. Castagnoli blasts him with a clothesline and pulls him up into the Riccola Bomb to retain at 8:21.

Rating: B. Now this was a nice showcase for Eagles, as he had Castagnoli staggered more than once and had the unique offense to make it interesting. While there was no threat of a title win, it was cool to see Eagles getting so show off out there. He’s a talented guy and if AEW/ROH can keep him around, it would be a nice addition to either roster.

Skye Blue wants to face Athena for the Women’s Title. That was pretty much a formality of a challenge so nice job of not wasting time.

The Kingdom/Varsity Athletes vs. Stu Grayson/Action Andretti/Darius Martin/Best Friends

Maria Kanellis-Bennett and Mark Sterling are here too. Taven and Andretti start things off with Andretti hitting a pop up dropkick before handing it off to Martin. Everything breaks down fast and the good guys clear the ring, setting up a series of running corner clotheslines to Taven. Nese comes in and whips Trent hard into the corner to take over, only to have Trent knee his way out of trouble.

Grayson comes in and we hit the parade of shots to the face. Grayson goes up but Woods runs the corner to superplex him back down. Trent superplexes Taven down onto the pile at ringside (egads), leaving Grayson to kick Daivari down back inside. Andretti goes up top…and here is the Righteous again for a distraction. Andretti hits his torture rack neckbreaker to finish Daivari at 6:24.

Rating: B-. This was the “just go nuts” match with ten people getting a few minutes to go out there and squeeze in whatever they could. They didn’t bother trying to make this into a back and forth match and it would have been nuts to see them try. This was the kind of entertaining chaos that you need sometimes on a show and they didn’t make the mistake of trying to stay out there too long. Nice job with a rather fun match.

Post match everyone is mad at the Righteous but the winners have the big hug.

Athena is in for the title match with Skye Blue.

Preston Vance vs. Rich Adonis

Vance sends him outside to start and the whips into the barricade ensue. Adonis gets in a few shots but charges into a slingshot wheelbarrow suplex. Vance hits a discus lariat for the pin at 2:19.

Action Andretti and Darius Martin are happy with their win but the Kingdom jumps them from behind. The Code of Honor is forcibly enforced.

Skye Blue vs. Robyn Renegade

Blue starts fast with a sunset flip for two and we hit the pinfall reversal sequence. Renegade heads outside and pulls Blue off the apron for a crash to the floor. Back in and Blue forearms away before snapping off a hurricanrana. It’s too early for Skyfall so Renegade knocks her down for two. Blue is back up and hits a superkick, setting up Skyfall for the pin at 4:15.

Rating: C. There wasn’t much drama here as Blue is already set for the title shot but Renegade got in some offense of her own. Renegade continues to look fairly polished in the ring and I could see her becoming something around here. Blue is getting the push right now though and the title match against Athena should be a nice showdown.

Brian Cage vs. Brock Anderson

Cage runs him over to start but Brock avoids a charge and hammers away. A powerslam puts Cage down for all of two seconds before he’s back with the Texas Cloverleaf. That’s broken up via the rope but Cage Drill Claws him for the pin at 3:15.

Rating: C. It still feels like AEW wants to push Cage as something and it is easy to see why, but squashing people on ROH and carrying the Gates of Agony isn’t enough. He continues to be able to do all kinds of things in the ring and looks solid doing it, but you can only get so far on potential. They need to figure out a story for him already, because his age and body aren’t going to hold out forever.

Willow Nightingale vs. Steph de Lander

They trade shoulders to start, with Nightingale getting the better of things and stopping to pose a bit. Back up and de Lander sends her into the corner for some shoulders to the ribs. Nightingale avoids a charge into the corner though and hits the Cannonball. The spinebuster gives Nightingale the pin at 3:40.

Rating: C-. They didn’t have time to do anything here but it was the usual Nightingale win over a lesser name before she probably loses her next big match. That has been her pattern for a long time now and there is little reason to believe that she is going to break the cycle. Not an awful match, but it was short and nothing new from Nightingale.

Kommander vs. Angelico

Serpentico is here with Angelico. Kommander sends him to the floor to start but Angelico is right back in to cut off the dive. Angelico’s chinlock doesn’t last long so he misses a running knee in the corner instead. With Angelico down on the floor, Kommander hits a big dive, followed by another dive, complete with a springboard.

A top rope sunset flip gives Kommander two back inside but Angelico grabs a suplex for the same. The Fall of the Angels is broken up and Kommander’s sunset bomb gets two. A hurricanrana gives Kommander two and there’s the big rope run flip dive to drop Angelico on the floor. Back in and a rope walk shooting star press finishes Angelico at 6:02.

Rating: B-. The flips and the dives are all impressive but there is something missing from Kommander that makes it hard to stay interested. His dives feel so much more focused on the setup/running the ropes than anything else and that doesn’t have quite the impact. It was still a nice spectacle, but when you have El Hijo del Vikingo around here as well, Kommander just doesn’t feel nearly as special.

Post match Serpentico comes in for the beatdown but Orange Cassidy and Bandido make the save.

Overall Rating: B-. Pretty solid show here with the Castagnoli/Eagles match being the highlight. It was another mostly all action show as they set up the Women’s title match, plus probably a six man given the ending. Other than that, they might have wanted to cut one or two of the short matches to not have it be stretched out so much, but it was still another completely watchable hour and a half.

Results
Rocky Romero b. Lee Moriarty – Cross armbreaker
Athena b. Angelica Risk – Crossface
Samoa Joe b. Christopher Daniels – MuscleBuster
Claudio Castagnoli b. Robbie Eagles – Riccola Bomb
Stu Grayson/Action Andretti/Darius Martin/Best Friends b. The Kingdom/Varsity Athletes – Torture rack neckbreaker to Daivari
Preston Vance b. Rich Adonis – Discus lariat
Skye Blue b. Robyn Renegade – Skyfall
Brian Cage b. Brock Anderson – Drill Claw
Willow Nightingale b. Steph de Lander – Spinebuster
Kommander b. Angelico – Rope walk shooting star press

 

 

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Joey Janela’s Spring Break 7
Date: March 31, 2023
Location: Ukranian Cultural Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Dave Prazak, Lenny Leonard, Veda Scott

This is the show where you just get to have fun and that is one of the best possible options. With this show, you’re going to see some insanity, some surprises and probably a lot of carnage, which should make for an entertaining night. It’s almost always a fun show and now we get the Los Angles version. Let’s get to it.

Gringo Loco vs. Shane Mercer vs. Tony Deppen vs. Cole Radrick vs. Komander vs. Billie Starkz vs. Blake Christian vs. Alec Price vs. Jack Cartwheel

It’s a Grab The Brass Ring DLC (Doors Ladders and Chairs, winner gets a future title shot of their choice) ladder match, which is at least a step above a scramble (I think). Christian comes out after the introductions and seems to be adding himself to the lineup. Then they call it a ladder match but also a scramble, as apparently the ceiling is too high to put up an actual brass ring so it will be pin or submission. That’s…..a way to go.

Deppen gets in the rather large Mercer’s face to start and the big brawl is on with most of them heading outside. Loco hits a springboard double armdrag on Deppen and Christian. Komander comes in and we get a showdown with Loco, who is hurricanranaed out to the floor. It’s Mercer taking Loco’s place with a backbreaker before Cartwheel is back in to pick up the pace. Cartwheel hits the big flip dive to the floor but Price comes in to clean a few rooms.

Mercer isn’t having that and throws Price over the top to send him outside. Loco is in with some chairs to Mercer’s head, followed by a top rope Canadian Destroyer. The first ladder is brought in as Christian gets to take Deppen down so he can ride the ladder down onto him. Loco is back in with a piledriver to Christian before bringing in a giant ladder. Starkz is back in to kick Loco in the head before going up top with Price.

That goes badly for Starkz, who gets put on and driven through a table for two. Deppen climbs the big ladder but another big ladder is bridged into it. Everyone comes crashing down and Cartwheel dives over the top to put Radrick through another door. Mercer takes Cartwheel up a ladder and hits a moonsault World’s Strongest Slam for two, with Loco using a chair to make the save.

Another door breaks rather quickly and the fans are NOT pleased. Mercer is laid on a door and it’s Loco going up the ladder, with Price on the bridged ladder to meet him (while Komander chills on the top turnbuckle). Price opts to dive on some people, followed by Komander walking the ropes to take out more people. Loco’s flip dive takes out Mercer and Starkz clears out a bunch of the weapons. Radrick comes back in and gets caught with a running forearm in the corner. Starkz plants Radrick but Christian comes in with a Stomp to pin Starkz at 14:07.

Rating: B-. The rules and setup were a little weird but at least they had the more interesting person win. Christian was announced as one of the more controversial/hated stars in the company so giving him the title match is a good idea. It was a pretty wild match, though cutting out two or three people (at least) would have helped.

Video on the Motor City Machine Guns vs. the East West Connection for the Tag Team Titles.

Tag Team Titles: Motor City Machine Guns vs. East West Express

The Express (Jordan Oliver/Nick Wayne) is challenging and the Guns jump them to start with the fight heading outside. Sabin goes after Wayne’s face, which was cut open badly in a match earlier today. The Express gets back in and hits stereo dives though, even as Wayne’s face is bleeding again.

Back in and Sabin gets caught with running boots in the corner but Shelley comes in for the save. Shelly sends the Express into the corner for a hesitation dropkick. The Guns get violent by tying the Express together and pulling on both of them at once. Oliver fights up and hits a running clothesline to Sabin, allowing Wayne to come in off the tag. Sabin is back up with a running boot to cut Wayne off in the corner but he sticks the landing out of a sunset bomb.

Everything breaks down again and Shelly Shell Shocks Wayne for two. The Border City Stretch has Wayne in more trouble and Sabin grabs a Texas Cloverleaf on Oliver. Both of them are broken up so the Guns hit Oliver with the Dream Sequence. Sabin kicks Shelly by mistake to send him to the floor, leaving Sabin to get Stunned into a German suplex. The corner cutter gets two on Sabin and a double cutter out of the corner gets a double two. Another double cutter hits Sabin for the pin and the titles at 12:28.

Rating: B-. It was an energetic match and the title change felt like a big deal, but the ending was a little flat. They just kept hitting the same move until it got a pin, which isn’t exactly a hot ending to a match. The Express winning the titles is a big deal and it’s cool to see the Guns as heels, but this didn’t quite get to the next level.

Here is DDT Ironman Heavymetalweight Champion (comedy 24/7 title from DDT in Japan) Yoshihiko (a female sex doll) for an interview. She is rather silent about being a champion and her title defense earlier today, but will be back in GCW. Cue Charles Mason, with Parrow, to interrupt. Mason jumps Yoshihiko and says she isn’t real before calling this whole thing dump. He whips out a knife and threatens to cut the throat, but Yoshihiko’s handler makes a save. It’s Jimmy Lloyd, who is going to be forced to watch the destruction….until Yoshihiko fights back and chases off the intelligen….er, heels.

Video on Mike Bailey vs. El Hijo del Vikingo.

Mike Bailey vs. El Hijo del Vikingo

Vikingo’s AAA Mega Title isn’t on the line. Believe it or not, they do trade flips around to start and shake hands once neither can get anywhere. An exchange of kicks doesn’t get anyone very far so Vikingo goes up top, loses his balance, jumps back up and mostly hits a super hurricanrana. Vikingo hits a dive to the floor but Bailey kicks him down and nails a middle rope moonsault to the floor.

Back in and a kick to the back gets two on Vikingo as this is already more grounded than anything I’ve seen Vikingo do. A dragon screw legwhip takes Vikingo down and Bailey does it again out of the corner (oh the irony). The leglock goes on so Vikingo crawls over to the rope for the break. Back up and they trade chops (Bailey’s aren’t as loud due to Vikingo’s chest being covered).

They take turns offering their backs to the other for chops….until Bailey kicks him instead. Vikingo is back with some running knees to send Bailey outside, where the shooting star from the apron connects. Back in and the middle rope Phoenix splash gives Vikingo two and Bailey is outside again. The slide takes too long though and Bailey is back up for a top rope moonsault.

Back in and Bailey kicks him down for two but the tornado kick misses. Vikingo’s imploding dragon rana only mostly works and they head to the apron for the exchange of kicks to the chest. Vikingo gets the better of things and climbs to the post, setting up a crazy Canadian Destroyer onto the apron to leave them both on the floor. Back up and Bailey blocks a shooting star with raised knees, setting up a floatover fisherman’s superplex for two (that was cool). Bailey’s Flamingo Driver is blocked though and Vikingo takes him up top for a super swinging Rock Bottom. That sets up the 630 to finish Bailey at 16:57.

Rating: B. This was what you would expect from these two as they were doing all of the crazy flips and dives, though in this case they did slow down a bit between some of the spots. Bailey going after the leg made sense, but ironically enough, Bailey’s opponent didn’t bother to sell the knee for once. It was entertaining, as Vikingo’s monster weekend continues.

Post match money is thrown into the ring and they put it into Vikingo’s helmet to split up later.

Bussy vs. Maki Death Kill

That would be Effy/Allie Katch vs. Nick Gage/Maki Itoh and….egads I have no idea what this is going to be like. As you might expect, the fans go nuts for Gage. The women start things off with a lot of posing and yell at each other a bit but then we have to stop for some Itoh posing. Allie isn’t having that and poses as well, though hers is a bit more suggestive compared to Itoh’s cute stuff.

That’s enough for Allie, who kicks her in the ribs but gets taken down. A falling headbutt is enough for Allie to bring Gage in to face Effy. They have some problems with a leapfrog so Effy drops to his knees. That means he has to slip out of a piledriver attempt so Gage slams him instead. A splash puts Gage down and it’s Allie coming back in to send Gage into the corner. Gage neckbreakers his way out of trouble and hits a suplex, allowing a somewhat reluctant tag to Itoh.

Some horrible right hands in the corner stagger Effy but a tornado DDT works a bit better. Gage whips out the pizza cutter so Allie, who has stolen his bandanna, wraps a chair around his head and sends it into the post. Effy uses the pizza cutter to carve up Itoh’s head and Allie gets in some carving of her own as the violence begins. Gage is back in with a DDT to Allie and a spinebuster to Effy. With Itoh safe…..Gage pulls out a SPECIAL pizza cutter, complete with a bow tie that matches Itoh’s gear.

Bussy both get cut at the same time (via split screen) and Effy is rather busted open. Back up and Allie and Gage hit stereo piledrivers to give us a bit showdown. The chokebreaker gives Gage two but Effy is back in. That earns him a chair shot from Itoh but Effy chairs both of them down. Itoh is so upset that she is about to cry, but flips Allie off for trying to kiss her better. That has Allie crying much harder until Gage is back up. Gage hits something like a One Winged Angel on Allie and Itoh’s diving DDT are good or double pins at 16:11.

Rating: C. It’s Nick Gage so this is only going to be so good in the first place. Save for the pizza cutter, they didn’t get too nuts with the violence, but it was still hard to sit through some of this stuff. Itoh’s gimmick is all around cuteness and that worked well enough, though it was nowhere near as over the top as she was in AEW. Bussy has been around all weekend and while Effy is hard to take at times, he was far less annoying here. Katch is always worth a look so this was a very weird mixture that could have been a lot worse.

Post match Gage and Itoh hit the catchphrase but Matt Cardona (in a Cody Rhodes jacket) and Steph De Lander run in with chairs to beat them down. Cardona calls it BS that they aren’t booked on this show or Wrestlemania. They both mock Gage and Itoh but here is World Champion Masha Slamovich to interrupt. Gage is up to take out Cardona and they fight to the back, so let’s do the impromptu World Title thing.

GCW World Title: Steph De Lander vs. Masha Slamovich

De Lander is in street clothes and challenging. Slamovich starts fast and hammers away but gets knocked hard into the corner. A suplex gives De Lander two but Slamovich gets in a kick to the head. It’s time for a really big door and some chairs, with Slamovich being dropped down onto the latter. Slamovich is fine enough to Air Raid Crash her through the door but here is Cardona to jump Slamovich. Gage and Itoh run in to break up a chair shot to Slamovich and Itoh hits some Reboots on Cardona in the corner. Slamovich chokes De Lander out to retain at 6:23.

Rating: C. This was rather quick and to the point, which is what something set up this way had to be. There is only do much that De Lander can do in street clothes and it more of a “hey we’re here too” deal than anything else. Slamovich hasn’t been champion long so getting her some title defenses piled up isn’t a bad idea. The match was a bit of a mess but it got out before it went too far.

Joey Janela vs. Kota Ibushi

This is Ibushi’s second match since 2021 due to an injury. Feeling out process to start and they go to the mat with Ibushi taking over. Janela grabs a headscissors but has to duck a big kick. Back up and Ibushi dropkicks him to the floor but won’t dive out there too. Janela chops away back inside, with Ibushi telling him to chop harder.

With that not working, Janela slaps on a figure four neck lock until the rope is reached. A hurricanrana sends Janela to the floor and now the springboard moonsault takes him down. Back in and a rolling suplex gives Ibushi two but Janela superplexes him down for a crash. They slug it out on the apron with Janela getting dropped hard to bust him open.

The slugout goes to Janela, who manages a DDT on the apron. Janela takes a good while bridging some doors over some chairs at ringside and Ibushi is back up. What looks to be a German superplex through the table is more a fall through them and Janela is mostly done. Back in and Janela snaps off a Death Valley Driver and then does it again for one.

Another slugout goes to Janela and the rather bloody Janela snaps off a German suplex. Then Ibushi gets his own German suplex, followed by the double clothesline for the double knockdown. Back up and they slap it out until Janela plants him with the package piledriver for two. A bunch of superkicks rock Ibushi but he’s back with a pair of running knees for the pin at 24:19.

Rating: B. This was a weird one as it went from just an ok match to a hard hitting bloodbath. Ibushi isn’t about to lose in his first regular match back (after his first was in Bloodsport) so this was more of a big homecoming. Janela still isn’t exactly great in the ring, but he knows how to put in a match like this and make it work well. Solid main event.

Respect is shown post match. Janela gets the mic and talks about the things that have been going on in recent years. He finally got his first contract with AEW but everything fell apart. He wasn’t sure what he was doing and he had to watch his ex-girlfriend be with someone else. After saying he’s cool with Penelope Ford and Kip Sabian, Janela talks about Kota Ibushi deciding to stay away from WWE and AEW. Janela calls him the embodiment of Japanese wrestling and hugs him to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. I’m not sure what to think of this one as it was much more a regular show and a good one, but I was expecting something more in the way of over the top. There was a ladder match, a Nick Gage match (take that for what you will) and the rest is straight wrestling. It’s more or less a GCW show and while it’s good (very good actually), it’s not exactly what I was expecting. Heck of a show, though not in the show’s traditional sense.

 

 

 

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