Tables Ladders and Chairs 2013
Date: December 15, 2013
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

We’re at the final PPV of the year and the main story tonight is of course the TLC title unification match between Orton and Cena to give us one world champion. It didn’t make a ton of sense when they did this in December of 2001 and it doesn’t make the most sense in December of 2013. This could headline Wrestlemania, but I guess they wants a big buyrate for December, so why not shoot everything they have at it and forget the incredible money it could draw four months from now. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Fandango vs. Dolph Ziggler

How was Ziggler world champion six months ago? Fandango puts him down with a shoulder block but walks into a nice dropkick. Ziggler is sent tot he floor and we take an early break. Back with Ziggler breaking out of a chinlock, only to get caught by a dropkick and rollup for two each. Dolph comes back with a quick Fameasser for two, causing Cole to say it’s shades of Billy Gunn, even though Ziggler has done more with that move than Gunn could ever dream of.

Ziggler pounds away in the corner and gets two off a clothesline. The Zig Zag is countered into a falcon’s arrow for two but he gets crotched going up top. Summer Rae distracts Ziggler though, allowing Fandango to hit the guillotine legdrop for the pin at 4:22. Too much was spent in the commercial to rate but the match was a glorified dark match with a surprise ending.

The pay per view opens with HHH and Stephanie coming to the arena. Vince was seen on the pre-show but is nowhere in sight here. Stephanie talks about what an important moment this is and acknowledges the crowd by saying YES, this is a huge moment. HHH says the World Championship dates back to Lou Thesz as champion (not true in the short version of a long story) and talks about how big tonight is.

The opening video talks about how the wrestling industry is defined by the champion and the future path of wrestling will be determined tonight. There will be only one if that wasn’t made clear.

Cole confirms that the winner will be the WWE World Heavyweight Champion which is the easiest layup possible.

CM Punk vs. Shield

Ambrose starts things up for Shield and feels Punk out a little bit. Punk wisely runs instead of being dragged into the Shield corner and shouts that he’s beaten Dean twice already so give someone else a shot. It’s off to Rollins so Punk bails to the floor to play some head games. Rollins chases him back into the ring and gets caught by some shoulders in the corner followed by three straight neckbreakers for two.

Seth fights up and brings in Reigns to throw Punk into the Shield corner. Rollins and Reigns make a wish on Punk’s legs before Seth hits a neckbreaker of his own. Back to Ambrose for some rib stomps before it’s off to Reigns for a hard clothesline. Shield is taking their time here instead of their usual fast tagging. Punk is thrown to the floor but still has enough in him to avoid Reigns’ spear over the announce table. Roman looks to have injured his eye when he went over the table.

Reigns is dazed but makes it back inside where Punk goes after his eyes. He rakes and punches away at it but Roman sends him outside again to get a breather. It’s off to Rollins as a doctor looks at Roman’s eye. A knee to Punk’s head is good for two but he shoves Rollins into Ambrose, knocking Dean to the floor. The high kick gets two on Seth and Punk speeds things up with ax handles to the face.

A great looking running knee in the corner sets up a high cross body for two and the Anaconda Vice is on. Ambrose makes a diving save and comes in off the tag. Dean loads up a superplex but gets headbutted down, setting up the Macho Elbow. The cover is delayed as Punk had to take out Rollins and Dean kicks out at two. Rollins charges in but gets caught in the GTS. Punk goes after Ambrose, only to sidestep a charging Reigns who spears Ambrose down by mistake. Punk sends him to the floor and gets the upset pin on Ambrose at 13:10.

Rating: C+. To clarify, Punk just beat the unbeatable Shield by pin with no outside interference. Let me guess: this is great, whereas if say Cena did this, it would be him playing Superman again. The match was fine but more storytelling than anything else. It should be interesting to see where Punk goes now, as he’s due for a return to the title picture after some time away.

AJ tells Renee that there’s only one Diva that matters around here. She isn’t on some silly reality show like Natalya and is going to be the one laughing after tonight. AJ is also counting days as champion now.

Divas Title: AJ Lee vs. Natalya

Natalya is challenging. AJ takes her down to start with a headscissors before Natalya reverses into an armbar. A low dropkick has Natalya in trouble so she heads outside, only to be distracted by Tamina, allowing AJ to send her face first into the apron. Off to a chinlock by AJ followed by a spinwheel kick to the jaw. Natalya comes back and sends AJ into the corner, only to get caught in a nice guillotine choke.

The blonde powers out and hits a basement dropkick to the face followed by some clotheslines. Some suplexes set up the Sharpshooter and Natalya brings her back to the middle of the ring, only to have AJ kick free. The Black Widow goes on but Natalya rolls out, breaking it for the first time. A clothesline puts AJ down again but another Sharpshooter attempt is countered into a small package for the pin at 6:42.

Rating: C. There were some nice false finishes in there but I’m over Natalya challenging for the title. AJ has completely cleaned out the division except for Tamina, setting up the showdown whenever they go that way. I’m sure we’ll hear about AJ vs. Total Divas again though, because just beating them about five PPVs in a row isn’t enough proof of who is better.

The announcers play up that AJ pulled hair to get the small package.

We get a video package on the world titles that we’ve seen on Raw and Smackdown with Flair and Rhodes and others talking about what winning the title means.

Intercontinental Title: Big E. Langston vs. Damien Sandow

Before the match, Sandow tells the Texas crowd some assorted phrases that are worthless: y’all, ye if followed by haw, and Big E. Langston: Intercontinental Champion. Nice touch. Langston throws the challenger into the corner to start and hits a corner splash to keep Damien in trouble. They head outside with Langston in trouble, only to miss a charge into the post to change momentum.

Back in and Damien pounds away at Big E.’s head before putting on a chinlock. The Wind-Up Elbow gets two for Sandow and we’re back to the chinlock again. Langston powers out of the hold and drops Damien with an electric chair. A belly to belly sets up the Warrior Splash for two but the Big Ending is countered into an Edge-O-Matic for two by Sandow. Another Big Ending attempt is countered into a small package for two but Langston is done messing around. He runs Sandow over with ease and the Big Ending is enough to retain the title at 6:25.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing you wouldn’t see on Smackdown. These two did virtually the same match with the same story earlier this year for Langston’s NXT Title so there was some practice coming in. Langston has a bright future and a title defense on PPV isn’t going to hurt him at all.

Vince is in the back and shakes Orton’s hand. They appeared to be talking but there was no sound.

We recap Kofi attacking Miz on the pre-show, setting up a No DQ match later tonight.

Tag Titles: Real Americans vs. Big Show/Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes/Goldust vs. Ryback/Curtis Axel

Rhodes and Goldust are defending and this is elimination rules. Ryback and Axel have both beaten the champions in the last few weeks while Big Show and Mysterio have teamed together I believe once. Ryback shoves Rhodes around to start but gets caught in a half crab, allowing Goldust to come in with an elbow to the back of Ryback’s head. Off to Axel for a nice dropkick, only to get caught in a wristlock.

Axel fights up but Goldust makes a tag off to Big Show who keeps up the arm work. There’s the skin ripping chop and the fans want it one more time. Show does it a third time and Axel sells it like he got shot. Mysterio comes in for some forearms but Axel sends him into the corner. Ryback gets the tag and pounds Mysterio down, only to bring Axel back in for something resembling stereo cross bodies to put both guys down.

Double tags bring in Ryback and Goldust with the champion scoring off the uppercut and a spinebuster. Ryback loads up a powerbomb but gets rolled up for the pin by Goldust, getting us down to three teams at 6:12. Cesaro comes in to pummel Goldust in the corner before it’s off to Swagger for a front facelock. The fans start chanting WE THE PEOPLE as Goldust is sent to the floor for a clothesline from Swagger.

Back inside and Cesaro gets two off the gutwrench suplex and we hit the chinlock. Off to Jack again for a bearhug as Big Show plays cheerleader for Goldust. Goldie fights back with right hands and a springboard elbow to the jaw. Cesaro easily takes him down and we get a short version Cesaro Swing. A Swagger belly to belly suplex puts Goldust down again and we get the Vader Bomb/double stomp sequence from the Real Americans for another two.

Antonio puts on another chinlock but this time Goldust escapes with a jawbreaker. Cesaro can’t break up the tag but Swagger runs around the ring and pulls Cody off the apron. Cody is holding his knee as Big Show throws Swagger into the barricade and Goldust catches Cesaro with a hurricanrana. A powerslam puts Cesaro down again and the hot tag brings in Big Show. Cesaro is thrown all over the ring and a shoulder block turns him inside out. Both Americans get punched in the jaw and Big Show pins Cesaro for the elimination at 14:42.

So we’re down to the two good guy teams but Big Show waits for the champions to get on their feet. A hard shoulder block puts Goldust on the floor and Cody gives him a somewhat angry pep talk. Goldust comes back in for a top rope cross body with Big Show waiting on the impact for about eight seconds. The chokeslam is countered into a DDT for two and it’s off to Cody for a double suplex on Big Show for two. The fans are rapidly losing interest.

Big Show swats a Disaster Kick out of the air and it’s off to Mysterio (remember him?) for a springboard seated senton to Cody. Now the Disaster Kick connects for two on Mysterio and Cody is getting frustrated. Cross Rhodes is countered into the 619 to both champions. Goldust is sent into the barricade by Big Show but Cody sends the giant into the post.

Cody tries a springboard dropkick but gets caught in a powerbomb by Rey (how often do you hear that?) for two. Cross Rhodes are countered again but the 619 is countered into an Alabama Slam which is countered into a sunset flip for a VERY close two. The third attempt at Cross Rhodes FINALLY connects for the pin to retain the titles at 21:06.

Rating: A-. This dragged a bit in the middle but man alive that ending was great. Cody and Goldust are just awesome right now and I’m so glad they didn’t give the titles to another thrown together team. I have no idea why the Usos weren’t in there somehow other than putting in two bigger names. Really good match here though.

A bunch of people play with Brawling Buddies in a head throbbing segment. The payoff is Kane scaring everyone off and having the Brodus Clay Buddy beat up the Cena Buddy. Cole: “…..Yep.”

Brodus Clay vs. R-Truth

Bonus match due to Brodus going nuts on Truth’s buddy Xavier Woods on Raw. Truth takes him into the corner to start and scores with a dropkick, sending Brodus to the floor. A nice dive takes Brodus out again but he comes right back with a Banzai Drop for no cover. He finally drags Truth back into the middle for two before throwing him corner to corner again.

A running splash in the corner crushes Truth but he still won’t go for the pin. They head outside with Tensai yelling at Clay to go for the win but instead Brodus puts Truth in the Tree of Woe. Tensai gets up on the apron for a shouting match before walking out. The Funkadactyls walk out as well and Truth hits a side kick into a rollup for the pin at 6:06.

Rating: D. This was much more of an angle than a match which is acceptable if they actually do something with Clay. The guy has a chance to be something interesting if he’s pushed properly, but given how they’ve pushed him twice before I can’t imagine it actually working. Good heel turn though.

Vince wishes Cena luck.

Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz

No DQ and set up by Miz attacking Kofi a few times recently in addition to the pre-show stuff earlier. Kofi goes nuts on Miz with right hands to start with Miz being sent to the floor. A Kofi dive is blocked by a right hand but Kingston drives him into the barricade. Miz is shoved up against the post but Kofi’s Trouble in Paradise hits the post, badly injuring his ankle in the process. Miz DDT’s the leg onto the floor and gets two back inside.

Kofi is in trouble but gets two off a quick rollup for a breather. Lawler talks about telegrams for some reason as Miz goes after the bad leg for some storytelling. Miz’s cannonball down onto the leg is countered with a kick to send him to the floor, only to have Kofi miss a dive, sending him into the barricade. Back in again and Miz unhooks a turnbuckle pad, setting up something big. The Skull Crushing Finale into the pad is countered into a rollup for two as we get a breather. Miz goes up but dives into a dropkick as a boring chant starts up. Back up and Kofi quickly sends Miz into the buckle to set up Trouble in Paradise for the pin at 8:03.

Rating: D+. This was longer than it needed to be and the ending didn’t do much for either guy. The leg stuff didn’t go anywhere at all which is one of the things that drives me crazy in matches. This feud isn’t going anywhere for either guy but they’re still feuding for no apparent reason.

Tribute to the Troops ad.

We recap Bryan vs. the Wyatts with Bray wanting Daniel to join the Family but getting kneed in the face instead.

Daniel Bryan vs. Wyatt Family

Bray of course sits in the rocking chair to start. Rowan gets us going for the team and takes Bryan’s head off with an elbow to the jaw. Daniel gets caught in the corner and it’s off to Harper for a lot of yeah yeah yeah. Bryan comes back with the surfboard knee stomps and some kicks but a shot to the ribs gives Luke control. Back to Rowan for some shots to the gut and a bearhug to slow the match down.

Harper slams Daniel down and Bray stands up. Wyatt himself comes in and shouts that he could have helped Daniel before splashing him in the corner. Bray goes nuts on Bryan before stopping for that evil look of his. A suplex/toss sends Daniel flying and Bray does the incredibly creepy Exorcist spider walk over to the corner for a tag to Harper. Fans: “THAT WAS CREEPY!”

Luke puts on a chinlock before Rowan throws Daniel back into the corner. A big boot from Harper puts Bryan down and it’s back to Bray who shouts about the fans. He offers Daniel his hand but Daniel kicks it away and pounds on Wyatt’s jaw. Bray will have none of that though and runs Daniel over before bringing Harper back in. Back up and Bryan avoids a charging Bray to send him into Rowan before avoiding a running big boot from Harper.

Daniel busts out an awesome belly to back superplex on Luke for two before firing off the kicks. The big one to the head sets up the swan dive but Daniel has to fire off the kicks to Rowan, tying him up in the ropes. A tag brings in Bray who gets rolled up for two but Wyatt runs him over again. Bryan is whipped into the ropes but he scores with the FLYING GOAT to Harper. Back in the missile dropkick drops Bray but he counters the YES Lock and pummels Bryan down. Sister Abigail ends Bryan at 12:25.

Rating: B-. I was digging this a lot by the end with Bryan giving it everything he had. The most interesting thing here though was Wyatt. He’s the kind of guy who you just have to watch when he’s on screen, which is a rare thing to find anymore. In a word, he’s mesmerizing. As for the result, there’s no way you can put both singles guys over in the handicap matches and it doesn’t hurt Bryan to lose here at all.

The expert panel (Booker and Foley) talk a bit.

We recap Orton vs. Cena which has been covered already. It’s to determine who is champion of champions and we get the video package of their parallel histories from Smackdown.

WWE World Heavyweight Championship: Randy Orton vs. John Cena

TLC match, winner take all. They have a ton of time to used for this too. Naturally we get big match intros and we’re ready to go. They head into the corner to start and Cena grabs a headlock. The wrestling gets boring though and we get our first ladder and table with the wooden one being set up in the corner. Orton escapes an AA through the table and heads to the floor for a chair. Cena can’t avoid the shot to the back and Randy is in control.

They head outside again but Orton misses a chair shot and hits the post, allowing Cena to pick up the chair. A series of chair shots puts Orton down and John loads up another table on the floor. The distraction lets Orton send him into the steps to take over again as the dueling Cena chants begin. Orton tries to climb but Cena makes a fast save. The ladder is thrown to the floor and Orton headbutts him down. Some kicks to the ribs have Cena in trouble but he comes back with knees and right hands, only to walk into the powerslam.

Randy brings in another ladder but gets it rammed into his ribs, allowing Cena to climb. Orton quickly suplexes him down but misses a ladder shot, sending the ladder to the floor. That’s fine with Orton though as he cracks Cena in the back with a chair before wedging it into the corner. Cena blocks the shot into the chair and comes back with his finishing sequence, only to have Orton poke him in the eye and send him into the chair. Another ladder is brought in but Cena makes yet another save.

They both fight on the ladder until Cena throws Orton over the top and through the table. He can’t climb that fast though and Orton pulls him down for an RKO. Both guys are down again but it’s Cena up first with a clothesline to send him to the floor. Cena blasts Orton in the head with the steps and Randy might be busted a little bit. John brings in another table, giving us two tables in opposite corners. With all of the metal stuff at ringside, Orton hits Cena in the head with the microphone to take over again.

Orton loads up the announce table but instead clears out a path to Cena. John avoids the Punt though and catches Orton in an AA through the table to put both guys down again. Cena very slowly gets back in and grabs both belts without pulling them down. Instead it’s Orton shoving the ladder away to leave Cena hanging, allowing Orton a free shot with the chair. Cena comes right back with a spear through one of the tables and both guys are down again.

Randy heads outside again and starts peeling back the mats to find some hidden handcuffs. Cena gets tied to the bottom rope and Orton teases him with the key. This didn’t work at Breaking Point but call backs to old matches are usually fun. Cena tries to break the chain as Orton goes to pick up the big ladder for some shots to Cena’s ribs.

Randy goes back inside as Cena beats on the cuffs with a chair to no avail. Cena pulls hard enough to rip the bottom rope off and go up to knock Orton off the ladder but he only has one free arm due to the rope. Orton grabs the rope and uses the power of gravity to pull Cena down, sending him head first into the table which DOESN’T BREAK. That looked bad. Orton goes up again and pulls down both titles for the surprise win at 24:35.

Rating: B. I liked the match and the ropes idea was good, but that ending came out of nowhere. Given how badly Cena’s head went into that table, I wouldn’t be shocked if he had an actual injury. Orton winning makes more sense but I’m kind of shocked it was clean. Well as clean as you can get in a TLC match of course. Good stuff here but the ending leaves a lot of doors open.

Post match here’s the Authority and Vince to congratulate Orton with no drama to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This show was about one match and the match delivered. The handicap matches both worked quite well too and the tag match ROCKED. It wasn’t a classic show or anything but it was much better overall than I expected. The ending sets up a lot of questions about where we’re going, but that makes things all the more interesting. Good show here and a solid ending to the year.

Results

CM Punk b. Shield – Punk pinned Ambrose after a spear from Reigns

AJ Lee b. Natalya – Small package

Big E. Langston b. Damien Sandow – Big Ending

Cody Rhodes/Goldust b. Real Americans, Big Show/Rey Mysterio and Ryback/Curtis Axel – Cross Rhodes to Mysterio

Kofi Kingston b. The Miz – Trouble in Paradise

Wyatt Family b. Daniel Bryan – Sister Abigail

Randy Orton b. John Cena – Orton pulled down the title belts

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: December 9, 2013
Location: Key Arena, Seattle, Washington
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

It’s Slammy night which usually means we’re in for anything from fun to annoyance, all while using the awards as props. It’s also the go home show for TLC, meaning we’re going to get a lot of Cena and Orton staring at each other while talking about what their belts mean. Also expect a lot of cameos. Let’s get to it.

The opening is like a big time awards show, talking about what will be announced tonight and talking about who will be here.

Jerry Lawler and Booker T are hosting the awards while Cole and JBL handle commentary.

We open with an explanation of how to download the WWE App. Expect to hear that a lot tonight.

Daniel Bryan vs. Fandango

Bryan is the hometown boy and has a new shirt. Daniel leapfrogs Fandango to start and dropkicks him down but gets kneed in the ribs for two. Fandango suplexes Bryan down, only to be sent face first into the middle buckle. Bryan pounds him down and hooks the surfboard knee crusher followed by a kick to the chest for two. A sidestep sends Bryan to the floor but Fandango misses a dive, setting up the FLYING GOAT. Bryan hits a running dropkick up against the barricade and we head back inside. Fandango is staggered but manages to catch Bryan coming off the top in a sitout powerbomb for two as we take a break.

Back with Bryan hitting the running clothesline and shaking like the reincarnated Ultimate Warrior. There are the YES Kicks as the Washington crowd goes nuts. The big kick misses so badly that Cole has to acknowledge it but Bryan gets two anyway. Bryan misses the running dropkick in the corner and gets suplexed down for two. Fandango misses the guillotine legdrop but Bryan hits the Swan Dive followed by the running knee to the face for the pin at 9:18.

Rating: C. Better match than I was expecting here with Bryan making Fandango look like a million bucks. That’s what Bryan might be best at and now he has the credibility to give anyone on the roster a rub. Good match here and it’s nice to see Fandango not look like a complete jobber every time he’s out there.

Post match we’ve got Bray on the screen. He doesn’t like Bryan’s unwillingness to comply and the clock is ticking. Bray doesn’t want to watch Bryan suffer because in his world, there are no happy endings or fairy tales. This story ends the same way that it started. Bray needs Bryan to know that he’s going to hurt Bryan bad and prove that Bryan is a monster just like him. In that moment, Bray can take all of Bryan’s pain away, if he’ll join the Family. The lights go out again and the fans chant NO.

Here are Jerry and Booker for our first award of the night. Up first is the Laugh Out Loud Award, presented by the New Age Outlaws, clad in powder blue and neon orange tuxedos, complete with top hats ala Dumb and Dumber. Road Dogg can talk just as fast as he used to. They do some of their schtick but get cut off by a ONE MORE MATCH chant. Billy tries to do the catchphrase but gets cut off.

The nominees are:

Vickie Guerrero being fired and freaking out

Titus O’Neil eating too much and getting sick in JBL’s hat

The Cobra being caught between Jinder Mahal’s and Great Khali’s snake charm flutes

Rock singing about Vickie Guerrero

Apparently we have to wait for the winner to be announced later because voting is still going on.

Back from a break and Rock wins the award. Vickie comes out to take the trophy and say the award represents her beauty.

Damien Sandow vs. Santino Marella

Santino starts with his power walk as Langston is on commentary. Sandow stomps Santino down and puts on a quick chinlock. Santino comes back with his hiptoss and the headbutt before loading up the Cobra. Damien legsweeps him down though and You’re Welcome ends this at 2:30.

Langston and Sandow stare each other down post match.

Shield, wearing suits, are here to present Double Cross of the Year. Before the nominees, Shield recommends never double crossing them. Ambrose cuts Reigns off and Roman doesn’t look pleased. The nominees are:

Mark Henry faking retirement

Shawn Michaels superkicking Daniel Bryan inside the Cell

Paul Heyman costing CM Punk MITB

HHH Pedigreeing Daniel Bryan at Summerslam

The winner is again after a break.

Post break and Shawn Michaels wins. Shawn thinks it’s ironic that he double crossed people for 25 years and wins an award four years after he retired. The fans chant YOU SOLD OUT and Shawn said he did that years ago which is why he’s still here. Shawn didn’t come off like a heel here but he wasn’t the nicest guy in the world.

The Miz vs. Kofi Kingston

This is another match we don’t need to see again. Kofi gets in a running kick to start but runs into a knee in the corner. A big boot puts Miz down and a few knees to the head get two each. Trouble in Paradise misses and Miz bails to the floor as a result. Miz tries to walk out but Kofi chases him down and blasts Miz in the back of the head. Back in and a springboard shot to the back of Miz’s head gets two. Miz counters a rollup and kicks him into the buckle and rolls Kofi up with a handful of tights for the pin at 2:38. Pretty messy match.

Post match Kofi kicks Miz in the head like a sore loser.

Eve Torres returns to present Diva of the Year. The nominees are:

The Bella Twins

Funkadactyls

Kaitlyn

Natalya

Eva Marie

AJ Lee

After a break the Bella Twins win and are booed out of the building.

Rey Mysterio/Big Show/Cody Rhodes/Goldust vs. Real Americans/Ryback/Curtis Axel

Ryback pounds Mysterio down to start but Rey slides through his legs and kicks Ryback in the face. The big guy heads outside to avoid the 619 and heads back inside to face the Big Show. Ryback is shoved into the corner and chopped in the chest before it’s off to Goldust for an elbow drop. Back from a break with Rey spinning Cesaro down with a headscissors before it’s back to Goldust.

Goldie is dragged into the corner and beaten down by Swagger, only to come back with the uppercut to the jaw. Swagger sends him to the floor so Cesaro can clothesline Goldust down for two. Off to Axel for a dropkick and an elbow for two before it’s back to Ryback for some pounding. Swagger puts on a front facelock as we hear about the Ascension Ceremony later tonight. There will be 20 world champions around the ring as the titles are raised into the air for the last time….except for Sunday but at least it’s something new.

Cesaro double stomps Goldust for two and we hit the chinlock. Goldust fights up and powerslams Cesaro down, only to be sent into the corner for a beating from Swagger. The Real Americans both come in but get caught in a double DDT to put everyone down. The hot tag brings in Cody to face Axel as house is cleaned. A springboard missile dropkick puts Axel down and there’s the moonsault press for two as everything breaks down. Big Show spears various heels and Rey tags himself in. The Disaster kick sets up the 619 and the top rope splash pins Axel at 11:40.

Rating: C+. The match wasn’t bad but these matches throwing Goldust/Cody vs. any combination of heels are going to stop working eventually. Big Show and Mysterio don’t work for me as a team as they’ve done the big man/little man combination so many times that it just doesn’t hold up.

How to download the WWE App The Sequel!

Booker and Jerry bring out Shawn Michaels to present Superstar of the Year. First though, Shawn declares himself Mr. Slammy. Also, since Shawn was always giving A+ performances, maybe we should call the award the H-B-Shizzle? Anyway, the nominees are:

Brock Lesnar

CM Punk

Big Show

Daniel Bryan

Randy Orton

John Cena

An hour and fifteen minutes in, this show is dedicated to Nelson Mandela. I really hope that was at the beginning of the show as well.

Bryan wins to set up the confrontation with Michaels. Bryan thanks the fans for giving him the H-B-Shizzle Award but also thanks Shawn for costing him the world title. This award is because of the people rather than what the Authority wants. Oh and GO SEAHAWKS.

Sin Cara vs. Alberto Del Rio

Cara now has red white and green tights. We get an inset interview with Del Rio saying he’s a former world champion and Cara is nothing. Del Rio is aggressive to start by headbutting Cara down, only to be cross bodied for his efforts. Cara pounds him on the head but gets caught in a suplex to put him down. More forearms put Del Rio on the floor but he tries to charge back in, only to be dropkicked out to the floor.

A Russell Wilson MVP (Seahawks quarterback) chant starts up as Del Rio is sent into the barricade. Back in and the corner enziguri puts Cara down but Alberto misses what looked to be a dropkick, even though Cara was on the mat. Del Rio rolls to the floor before the Swanton can launch and we take a break. Back with Del Rio holding a chinlock but Cara fighting out and dropkicking Alberto down for two. The tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two for Alberto and he takes Sin outside to send him into the barricade.

Back in and we hit another chinlock before the low superkick gets two for Del Rio. Cara avoids a charge into the corner and hits a tornado DDT for two. A handspring elbow gets the same but Del Rio hits the Codebreaker to the arm. Cara escapes the armbreaker and hits a rolling Angle Slam to put Alberto down. The Swanton takes too long to set up though and Cara gets crotched on the top. Del Rio loads up a superplex but gets caught in a sunset bomb, setting up the Swanton for the pin at 11:04.

Rating: B-. If they’re not careful they’re going to make a star out of Sin Cara. It’s remarkable how much better Hunico is at playing the character and he’s nailing this second run. Good match here and it’s good to see Del Rio dropping down the card like he should have done a long time ago.

The Prime Time Players are here to present the Audience Presentation Award, which is basically best chant. They insert the Millions of Dollars dance as an honorable mention. The nominees are:

Fandango-ing

YES! YES! YES!

Let’s Go Cena/Cena Sucks

What’s Up!

Daniel Bryan wins which isn’t a huge surprise. He says the only thing he can think of: YES! YES! YES!

Brodus Clay vs. Xavier Woods

Woods goes right at him and pounds away in the corner, only to be powerbombed in half to stop the momentum. Brodus hits a middle rope splash for the pin at 39 seconds.

Post match Brodus destroys Woods with elbows and splashes. Woods appears to have hurt ribs.

Here’s Miz to present Insult of the Year. The nominees are:

AJ Lee – “I didn’t get here because I SUCKED….up to the right people.” (Total Divas promo)

Zeb Colter – Almost anything he said

Paul Heyman – Insulting CM Punk

Stephanie McMahon – Insulting Big Show before firing him

Stephanie wins, of course. She says what she said was a huge compliment because everyone knows it was best for business.

CM Punk vs. Dean Ambrose

Rollins and Reigns are staying at ringside. Punk takes him down into a headlock followed by a wicked looking armbar to start. Dean fights up and takes Punk over to the rope, only to be taken down with a hammerlock. Back up and Punk tries a spinning cross body off the ropes but dives into a gutbuster instead. Dean stomps away at the injured ribs and drops an elbow for two before being Punk’s back around the ropes.

Punk has his face shoved into the mat for two and we hit the reverse chinlock. CM fights up and sends Dean chest first into the corner before throwing Ambrose outside to get a breather. The suicide dive takes Ambrose out but Punk has to keep an eye on the rest of the Shield as we take a break.

Back with Ambrose holding a headlock but getting belly to back suplexed down. Punk misses a dropkick and as per wrestling logic, he hurts himself despite landing the same way he would have had the move connected. A swinging neckbreaker gets two on Ambrose and some forearms keep him in trouble. The knee in the corner sets up the Macho Elbow for two but Ambrose comes right back with a butterfly suplex.

Punk’s top rope cross body is rolled through for two but he comes back with the high kick for two of his own. The fans think this is awesome. Ambrose knees him in the rubs but sends Punk to the floor where Shield gets in his face for some reason. The other two members leave and Punk hits a quick GTS for the pin at 17:07.

Rating: B. As I said on Smackdown: this was exactly what you would expect from Punk vs. Ambrose when they get time. I wish they would let someone else lose the fall to Punk, but at least this time we got some storyline development as a result. Very solid TV match here as anyone would have expected.

Post match Reigns comes back in with a spear to Punk’s bad ribs.

We get the same video about what winning the world title means from Smackdown.

Mick Foley presents the Most Extreme Moment of the Year Award. The nominees are:

Shield putting Undertaker through a table in England

Ryback slamming Cena through the set in their last man standing match

CM Punk destroying Heyman on top of the Cell

Wyatt Family crushing Kane’s head at Summerslam

Punk wins although almost none of these were extreme. He says it’s weird to win an award without wearing pants but promises to be even more extreme on Sunday against the Shield.

Usos vs. Wyatt Family

Jey tries to speed things up on Rowan to start and manages to dropkick him out to the floor. In a cool spot, Jey dives through the ropes while Jimmy dives off the top to take out Harper. Bray laughs as we take a break. Back with Harper holding Jey in a chinlock before bringing in Rowan for a fallaway slam. Erick misses a charge in the corner and the hot tag brings in Jimmy for a Samoan drop and the running Umaga attack in the corner. Everything breaks down and Harper gets superkicked down, setting up the Superfly Splash for two as Rowan makes the save. Rowan is kicked down as well but Harper takes Jey’s head off for the pin at 8:28.

Rating: C-. The show is starting to drag but at least the match wasn’t too bad. That lariat is absolutely awesome and proves that a simple move can become something special if it’s given enough time. Rowan is looking better and better every time he’s out there which is nothing but good.

Bret Hart presents the Match of the Year Award. The nominees are:

CM Punk vs Undertaker – Wrestlemania 29

Cody Rhodes/Goldust vs. Shield – Battleground

HHH vs. Brock Lesnar – Extreme Rules

The Rock vs. John Cena – Wrestlemania 29

Rock vs. Cena wins which is as good as anything else I guess. Cena gets a mixed reaction but it’s mainly booing for his standard acceptance speech.

Natalya vs. Tamina Snuka

Since this show hasn’t gone on long enough already. Tamina takes her into the corner and stomps away as AJ looks on with an evil smile from ringside. Natalya avoids a charge and hits a discus lariat but goes after AJ. Tamina picks up Natalya but accidentally swings her into AJ, allowing Natalya to put on the Sharpshooter for the win at 1:37.

There are twenty former world or WWE Champions in the ring for the final segment. We have Swagger, Christian, Bryan, Mysterio, Miz, Henry, Khali, HHH, Booker T, Kane, Bret, Punk, Foley, Del Rio, Big Show, HBK and Ziggler. HHH gives an introduction but a Daniel Bryan chant makes him pause. Henry raises Bryan’s hand to really fire up the crowd. This is one heck of a chant as the YES YES YES keeps it going. HHH finally gets a word in and brings out Cena and Orton to bring us up to 19 champions (JBL was supposed to be #20 but he’s still on commentary).

The belts are placed on the hanger and Orton talks about what image means to Cena. He gets annoyed at the fans chanting YES before talking about taking years off Foley’s career and embarrassing Shawn over and over. There wouldn’t have had to be a Montreal Screwjob because Orton would have knocked Bret out cold. The fans think Orton sucks before booing Cena out of the building as well. Cena says Orton talked about working hard and asks Bryan to stand next to him.

Cena asks Bryan where he’s from and if his parents were WWE Superstars. Bryan says no, but YES he’s had to work for everything he’s achieved in WWE. Orton hasn’t had to work his entire career because the right guys liked him. Now he hides behind the Authority and says he’s bigger than everything here. Orton has always blamed everyone else for his failure and has had behavior problems everywhere.

The only reason Randy wants the titles is greed but Cena has always given opportunities. When no one wanted Ziggler, Cena said let’s fight. When Punk was about to leave, Cena agreed to give the best in the world the title shot. When Daniel Bryan was the hottest thing in WWE, Cena gave him a shot and lost. Orton is going to need luck on Sunday and they

very tensely shake hands. The belts are raised and the brawl is on.

Punk goes after Orton but HHH throws Punk down. That earns the boss a beating but Shawn kicks Punk down to save his buddy. Bryan hits the running knee on Shawn but has to avoid an RKO, shoving Orton into Stephanie in the process (crowd: “YES! YES! YES”!). HHH Pedigrees Orton as Cena and Kane help Stephanie up. The fans chant for Bryan as Orton looks at the Authority and Cena to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This show was…..long. It set up the three major matches at TLC but the awards gimmick got old about an hour into the show. Bryan and Shield looked good tonight but other than that the awards felt like they were as planned as they possibly could have been. The ending segment came close to saving it but only brought it up to decent. The show wasn’t bad for the most part but it felt like a show you could have just read online the next morning and gotten everything you needed to know out of it.

Results

Daniel Bryan b. Fandango – Running knee

Damien Sandow b. Santino Marella – You’re Welcome

The Miz b. Kofi Kingston – Rollup

Rey Mysterio/Big Show/Goldust/Cody Rhodes b. Real Americans/Ryback/Curtis Axel – Top rope splash to Axel

Sin Cara b. Alberto Del Rio – Swanton Bomb

Brodus Clay b. Xavier Woods – Middle rope splash

CM Punk b. Dean Ambrose – GTS

Wyatt Family b. Usos – Discus lariat to Jey

Natalya b. Tamina Snuka – Sharpshooter

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This isn’t something that has me on my toes.Coming out of Raw, it appears that the title feud going forward will be Big Show vs. Randy Orton, with the two fighting at least at Survivor Series.  The idea is supposed to be that Big Show has lost everything, including his home and has nothing left to lose.  However, now he’s right back where he was, challenging for the world title and likely in the main event of a major PPV.  Let’s pause here for a minute and jump back to the 80s, in particular 1984 in Georgia Championship Wrestling.

 

Around this time, the top feud over the NWA TV Title was between Jake Roberts and Ron Garvin.  Roberts defeated Garvin for the title and Garvin of course wanted a rematch.  For weeks and weeks he begged Roberts for the title shot but Roberts kept saying no.  Finally Roberts agreed if Garvin could come up with $10,000.  Garvin didn’t have that kind of money so he mortgaged his home and came up with the money.  Ronnie won the title back in an emotional moment and was able to fix his financial situation.

 

Now compare this to the Big Show story.  We were told that Big Show lost everything, told that HHH bought Big Show’s house and told that Big Show was suspended.  Now Big Show is back, still with music, still coming down the entrance, still with new merchandise, and apparently still fighting at house shows and presumably at Survivor Series.  Where’s the heartache?  Where’s the reason for us to care about him?

 

The key difference between Big Show and Garvin: we saw Garvin being hurt by the loss and we’ve been told about Big Show being hurt.  Secondly, Big Show lost his house what, a month ago?  He’s been back with nothing to lose and hasn’t once even seemed sad.  There’s no reason to feel his pain and therefore, the story isn’t quite working.  It’s just Big Show saying he’s had problems but having it not change anything at all.  That doesn’t work.

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 23, 2000
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the night after No Mercy and the big story is Kurt Angle shocked the world by beating Rock to become the new WWF Champion. Angle has only been around for about a year at this point and is still a goofy character so this was a pretty big surprise. Other than that Austin didn’t quite get his revenge on Rikishi for nearly killing him eleven months prior but you know that’s not over. Let’s get to it.

We open with an In Memory graphic for Yokozuna. Ignore them incorrectly listing him as a three time world champion.

Here’s a bandaged up Rikishi to open things up. He wants to know where Steve Austin is despite knowing that Austin was arrested for trying to crush Rikishi with a car last night. Rikishi talks about the crime that was committed last night but he’s talking about Rock losing the WWF Title. Rikishi was down there to help Rock and even though they lost the battle last night, they’ll win the war. He asks Rock to come down here to hear what Rikishi has to say so here’s the Brahma Bull.

Rikishi apologizes for last night and that he didn’t mean for Rock to lose the title. Rock says that the two for them have done a lot together over the years, but Rock wants nothing to do with him or his apology. Not that it matters as Rock will be the WWF Champion again on his own, meaning without Rikishi’s help. Rikishi understands that Rock is upset, but he’s starting to hurt the big man’s feelings.

That doesn’t really sway Rock who says Rikishi can wipe himself with his feelings. Rock talks about Rikishi having a stomach ache from eating so many hamburgers and hot dogs and suggests Rikishi leave for good. Rikishi says he’ll be there for Rock whether he likes it or not, so Rock says he has to do what he has to do. A Rock Bottom lays the fat man out.

Trish pitches a Women’s Title match against Lita if it’s under bra and panties rules. Commissioner Mick Foley goes over the rules and accepts the idea.

Women’s Title: Lita vs. Trish Stratus

Lita is defending and remember that this is bra and panties. Lita tackles her down to start and takes it into the corner before this becomes a catfight. This is about two years before Trish was even remotely good in the ring so this isn’t going to be anything more than what you would expect. Trish rips off Lita’s top so Lita does the same to Trish. The champ is about to fall out of her top before suplexing Trish down, hitting the moonsault and completing the stripping to retain.

This brings out the furious Right to Censor to complain about how bad women like Lita and Trish are for America. Steven Richards brings out the newest member of the RTC: Ivory, dressed in something a Puritan would find too conservative. She’s in a white collared blouse and a long black skirt while ranting about the clothing women wear today being too revealing. Trish laughs the ideas off and we’ve got a new monster heel Diva.

Michael Cole is in the back with the new WWF Tag Team Champions, Los Conquistadors. This is a little complicated but I’ll get to the explanation later. Anyway, Edge and Christian come up to them to congratulate them on their win and prove that they’re two different teams. Remember that, as it becomes important later.

Here’s Benoit with something to say. He’s noticed that talent, will and determination are useless. Being the best technical wrestler in the world today doesn’t mean a thing. HHH may have beaten him last night but the only game that won last night was HHH getting help from his wife last night. Starting tonight, things are different because no one and nothing will stop him because his time is now. Prove him wrong.

Chris Benoit vs. Road Dogg

Benoit drives him into the corner to start and stomps Roadie down with ease. A backbreaker gets two but Benoit misses the swan dive, allowing Road Dogg to hit a few left hands. Dean Malenko comes out for a distraction though and the Crossface gets a quick submission. Basically a squash.

Cole tells Rikishi that no one wants him here but he says he’ll be here all night no matter who likes it.

HHH doesn’t like that people thought his era was over. Last night he proved Benoit wrong by showing he’s a better technical wrestler than Benoit is. Coach asks HHH about Stephanie helping Angle win the WWF Title last night but HHH says that’s his own business. However, Angle put Stephanie in harm’s way, so now it’s time for HHH to take it out on Angle.

We get a clip from last night of Austin trying to run over Rikishi and getting arrested last night.

Crash is in charge of the APA’s office while they’re out hurt. Test and Albert come in and kick him out.

Jericho gives a stagehand a Fozzie CD and plugs an upcoming performance on Heat. He turns around and spills his coffee on Kane, saying he hopes he didn’t burn him. You don’t talk about burning Kane and the Canadian is destroyed.

European Champion William Regal is in the ring and calls most of the fans uncivilized. He’s in the capitol of Connecticut which produces more handguns which kill more people than any other stage. Cue Jericho to interrupt, apparently not dead at Kane’s hands. He does have a bad left arm though.

European Title: Chris Jericho vs. William Regal

Jericho gets the mic to insult Regal but decides Willy isn’t worth it and charges in to get us going. The bell rings and Jericho fires off chops followed by a spinwheel kick and a clothesline for two. Regal avoids a charge to send Jericho shoulder first into the post and gets two of his own off a spinning powerbomb. A tiger bomb is countered into a suplex by Jericho but Regal goes after the bad arm to take him down. They slug it out a bit but Regal blocks a clothesline by going after the arm again. Regal loads up a neckbreaker but the not very nice Jericho kicks Regal low. There’s the Lionsault but Kane comes in for the DQ.

Kane lays out Jericho with a chokeslam and lights up the corners of the ring.

T&A (Test and Albert) can’t figure out how the initials for Test and Albert Protection Agency should be spelled.

Stephanie and Angle arrive and are greeted by paparazzi.

Here are Stephanie and Kurt for their first public appearance with the title. Stephanie gives him a long winded (I’m as shocked as you are) intro before confetti and balloons rain from the ceiling. The balloons are popped as Angle talks about how America is falling apart. For most people it’s overcoming poverty but for most people here it’s about overcoming being born in Hartford, like Stephanie has done. Angle brags about winning the gold medal in Atlanta but that wasn’t enough for him. Most people would just give up, but he’s not most people.

Four years later (it was three) he came to the WWF and now he’s proven that he’s the best in this company as well. Two months after he got here, he won the European Title and tourism grew by 38% in Europe. We get an over the top highlight package with Angle narrating. He won the Intercontinental Title two months later, becoming the first Eurocontinental Champion in history. “Well except for D’Lo Brown who doesn’t count.” Then he won King of the Ring, sending sales of crowns and scepters up an amazing 40%.

Last night was the crowning achievement though by winning the WWF Title. Angle’s rookie year really is incredible and I can’t think of a better one in wrestling history. Angle has a poem for us called What Makes A Guy Super Great. He gets about two lines down until Foley interrupts. JR: “THANK GOD!” Mick asks for an ovation for Angle on his title win, but says there’s something he didn’t get last night: a celebratory hug.

Stephanie was unable to give him one due to being unconscious from a Rock Bottom. Mick is one heck of a hugger, so he’d be willing to offer his services. Foley gets all teary eyed and announces Angle’s first title defense……….right here in Hartford, Connecticut….against HHH and the Rock in a triple threat. Awesome segment here with Angle at his very best. Goofy Angle is one of my favorite characters ever and this was some of his best work.

Chyna goes looking for Eddie but finds the two women she caught him in the shower with last week. She shuts the door and a lot of violence can be heard. Chyna leaves and the bodies are shown laid out everywhere. One of those girls is Victoria/Tara.

Too Cool vs. Tazz/Raven

Tazz and Raven formed a short lived ECW tag team around this point because there was nothing else for them to do. Scotty kicks Raven in the face to start and Grandmaster adds a middle rope dropkick to take Bird Boy down again. Tazz walks into a powerslam and Raven is kicked out to the floor. The distraction lets Tazz suplex Grandmaster down and the heels take over.

Raven bulldogs him down for two and it’s already back to Tazz as the announcers ignore the match to talk about a cookbook. Raven jumps into a boot to the face and it’s off to Scotty to speed things up. A superkick gets two on Tazz and everything breaks down. Raven accidentally hits Tazz and Grandmaster hits Raven with the guillotine legdrop. Tazz makes the save and Raven returns the favor by breaking up Worm with a DDT to Scotty for the pin.

Rating: D. Just a match here really and as basic as you could ever get. Just throwing people together into a team because they used to work for another company doesn’t really work that well. They wouldn’t o anywhere as a team as there’s just nothing interesting about them together.

Christian isn’t sure which glasses to wear in the match tonight. Pete Gas from the Mean Street Posse of all people comes in and asks to see Edge.

After a break Edge comes back into his dressing room and finds the place wrecked and Christian put through a table. Apparently the Dudleys attacked him and injured his shoulder. Edge says it’s just Los Conquistadors so he’ll win the titles himself.

Billy Gunn vs. Val Venis

Chyna is with Billy here so Eddie comes out before the match. Billy stops her from killing him, allowing Val to jump the Gunn (I’m here all week) and get things going early. A knee drop gets two for Venis and he peppers Billy with forearms. Billy grabs a quickly broken sleeper but gets countered into a blue thunder bomb for two. They clothesline each other down before Billy hits a Stinger Splash and a Jackhammer, only to have Steven Richards break up a Fameasser. Richards is pulled in for a bit but the Fameasser hits for the pin anyway.

Rating: D. Why Billy Gunn kept getting pushed is beyond me. He was athletic but there are some people that just don’t work as a singles guy. Billy just didn’t have it, but I’d be curious to know how much of that is because of his nickname. You can only get so far with his name and gimmick and he crashed into that ceiling far before this.

Stephanie isn’t sure whose corner she should be in tonight. She asks HHH what he wants but he says he just wants her safe.

Video on Jerry Lawler at Las Vegas Outlaws cheerleader tryouts. I think you can figure this one out.

Tag Titles: Edge vs. Los Conquistadors

Edge looks confused as the champions come to the ring. We’ll say Uno starts but is easily punched down. Uno grabs a quick small package for two and Edge is furious. Los Conquistadors both come in and hit Poetry in Motion as the fans suddenly get it. A Twist of Fate and the Swaton connect for the pin to retain the titles.

Post match the champions of course unmask as the Hardys. Cue Mick Foley to wonder how the Hardys can be the Conquistdors when they wrestled the Conquistadors last night. Foley has some footage from earlier which shows Edge and Christian admitting they were in the Conquistadors costumes last night. The problem with that is Edge and Christian weren’t allowed to challenge for the tag titles, but since they fooled him, the tag title change from last night stands. Unfortunately for Edge and Christian, tonight’s title change (there was a change?) stands as well, meaning the Hardys are YOUR Tag Team Champions.

Rikishi tells Cole to tell Rock that he’s helping him get the title back.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. HHH vs. Kurt Angle

Stephanie is in the back with Kurt and tells him to wait before going to the ring since he’s the champ. He finally gets in and the challengers both deck him in the face for making them wait. Kurt clotheslines HHH down but celebrates too long, allowing Rock to drop him with a clothesline of his own. HHH is knocked to the floor and Kurt pounds away on Rock in the corner while he has a chance. Rock comes back with a quick Samoan drop but HHH dives in for the save.

Now it’s Rock being sent to the floor to give us another mini-match. HHH stomps the champion down in the corner and gets two of his own off a neckbreaker. Angle comes back with a gorgeous German suplex but Rock pulls him out to the floor. Everyone goes outside and Rock and HHH get into a contest to see who can slam Kurt head first into the announce table the hardest. Stephanie tries to break it up so Rock stares her down, causing HHH to get in Rock’s face. Angle has the ring bell but Rock ducks and HHH gets blasted in the side of the head instead.

That leaves Rock vs. Kurt in the ring for a bit with Rock hitting a DDT but the referee is checking on the Game. Kurt suplexes Rock down for the same result as a stretcher is brought out for HHH. Angle hits the Olympic Slam out of nowhere and Hebner FINALLY slides back in to count two. HHH gets off the stretcher and stumbles back to the ring for a quick Pedigree on Kurt. Rock saves and clotheslines HHH down before hitting a Rock Bottom on the champion. This time it’s HHH with the save but Angle breaks up a Pedigree with a belt shot to the face. Rikishi comes out to beat up Angle and that’s a DQ somehow.

Rating: C+. This picked up at the halfway point but why did we have a DQ when Rikishi came in but not for a bell or title shot to HHH’s head? Either way, good stuff here as Angle fits this role perfectly: the guy who isn’t all there at times but can be a killer in the ring. Good stuff here.

Post match here’s Austin to go after Rikishi. He clotheslines Angle on the way down the ramp before pounding away on Rikishi, only to have Kurt come back in to go after Austin for the clothesline. I like that as it’s better than just having Angle come in for no apparent reason. Rikishi escapes and a Stunner to Angle ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. The key difference between today’s shows and this episode is how many different ideas there were back in 2000. You don’t see the same finishes or repetitive matches or the same stories being used over and over again until we get to a PPV to shake things up. There’s an idea to everything going on and instead of using a batch of jobbers over and over again, you get some fresh matches. It makes the show WAY easier to sit through and far more enjoyable as a result.

 

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It’s still not a good sign.Raw got a 2.71, down from last week.  Monday Night Football last night was a horrible matchup, meaning it shouldn’t have been much competition for WWE.  The numbers have been down since the start of both the Bryan push as well as the new regime storyline.  Bryan isn’t the main focus but he’s still a big deal on the show.  These ratings aren’t a good sign for his long term future as a top guy though.

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 14, 2013
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

The main story coming out of last week is Big Show knocking out HHH to end the show but not seeming all that upset at the prospect of losing his job or his house. Other than that we’re still without a WWE Champion because having no one hold it for two and a half months is fine. Shawn Michaels is scheduled for the show tonight so let’s get to it.

We open with Shawn Michaels with something to say. He thanks for everyone that voted for him last week to be the guest referee. It’s nice that not everyone forgot about old H-B-Shizzle (again his words, not mine). He’s made it well known that he has a history with both guys in the title match since he trained Daniel Bryan and has always liked him but never liked Randy Orton.

Shawn talks about being in the first HIAC match in this very building and that it made him glad he’s retired. What happened at Battleground and Night of Champions was a crock and it will not happen again. Shawn guarantees us a new WWE Champion which draws out hometown boy Orton.

Randy promises to make this sweet because he has a match up next. Orton was born and raised right here in St. Louis so he knows the people here better than Shawn. They’re not that bright but Orton can see right through Shawn. As great as Shawn was, Orton is just that much better and it eats Shawn up inside. Shawn: “Oh snap were you talking? I wasn’t even listening.”

Orton needs to leave Shawn alone and worry about Bryan, but Orton promises to hurt Daniel inside the Cell. Randy threatens Shawn if he tries to screw Orton over but Shawn threatens him with some Sweet Chin Music. Both guys try their finishers and Orton bails to the floor, only to be jumped by Miz, his opponent tonight. The match is after the break.

Randy Orton vs. The Miz

Back from a break with Miz firing off knees to the ribs but getting sent into the corner for a clothesline. Miz comes back with a clothesline of his own to send Randy to the floor but his baseball slide misses, allowing Orton to hit yet another clothesline. Miz is sent into the steps and back inside we get the Orton stomp for two. Off to a chinlock for a few seconds before Miz is sent over the top and out to the floor.

Randy can’t get the Elevated DDT though as Miz shoves him into the post before heading back inside. Some shots to the head have Randy in trouble and there’s the corner clothesline into the top rope ax handle. Orton rolls out of the Finale but tries the Figure Four….and here are the Wyatts. The distraction lets Orton snap off an RKO for the pin at 5:20.

Rating: D+. Lesson #1 in how to win a match: NEVER look to the stage. If there has been a more over used finish in the span of a few months it eludes me completely. That finish has to be done at least once a year. Other than that and clothesline abundance aside, this wasn’t too horrible with Miz having a bit of a fire to him.

Bray says that Miz is everything that he hates about this world. All of the glitz and glamor and red carpet and all that good stuff. Bray talks about us being stuck in the spider web of this moment and promises to take Miz down.

Fandango vs. Santino Marella

Naturally we start with a quick dance off before Fandango takes him down into a chinlock. A suplex sets up more dancing but Santino avoids something off the top. A jawbreaker of some sort puts Fandango down and Santino comes back with the usual. He loads up the Cobra but has to stop before almost hitting Summer Rae, allowing Fandango to roll him up for the pin at 2:30.

Paul Heyman asks Brad Maddox for more in the Ryback vs. Punk match. He says that Punk has made Maddox look ridiculous in this build up and thinks Punk should be punished. Heyman suggests Punk vs. Ryback/Axel in a handicap match but Maddox doesn’t think that’s very fair. Brad goes with a Beat the Clock challenge instead. Tonight it’s Ryback vs. Truth and Punk vs. Axel with the winner (either Heyman or Punk) getting to pick the stipulation for the PPV.

NXT wrestler Xavier Woods has started a petition to bring back Big Show. JBL spends the next fifteen seconds talking over Cole and ranting about how stupid a name Xavier Woods is and how Big Show should be fired.

Video on John Cena making a comeback.

Los Matadores vs. 3MB

It’s Slater/McIntyre here, in case you didn’t get the idea the first three times. Diego runs over McIntyre to start and hits a nice flying headscissors to send him out to the floor. Slater of course chases after the bull before taking over on Fernando back inside. The Band pounds away for a bit before allowing the hot tag off to Diego. The double Angle Slam is enough to take out Slater at 4:03.

Rating: D. I am so over these guys already and they’ve only been here two weeks. Have they even fought anyone other than 3MB in that span? Oh wait they beat Los Locales, meaning only four of their five matches have been with 3MB. I can’t picture these guys lasting much longer.

Post match Mahal takes the double finisher and Torito adds a springboard seated senton for good measure.

We recap Big Show’s antics last week.

Here are HHH and Stephanie for their big interview of the week. Stephanie talks about making a mistake but gets cut off by a YOU GOT KNOCKED OUT chant. She talks about bailing Big Show out one time too many and then he got fired. This was the last time too because Show is out of a job and they’re selling his house and pushing criminal charges.

As for HHH, he’s nowhere near as bad as the reports say. HHH is the Game ad you don’t get those names without earning them. HHH says he’s been the boss for two years now and did all that for the fans. He’s been trying to ensure that the WWE is here for years to come and knows what kind of punishment that brings. He talks about being pushed beyond his breaking point last week when he got knocked out and a Goat Face stood over him while the people chanted YES. That brings us to now and HHH is willing to be the bad guy. He’ll be that guy, but he’s going to do things that we’ve never seen before.

The fans chant YES even more and here’s Daniel Bryan to answer the call. Before he can say anything though, Alberto Del Rio jumps him from behind and knocks Bryan down the ramp. The low superkick keeps Bryan down and the McMahons make the obvious match of Del Rio vs. Bryan for later tonight.

Ryback vs. R-Truth

Beat the Clock match here so Truth immed heads to the floor. The chase is quickly on until Truth gets in some shots back inside. Truth gets a few near falls but Ryback finally slows him down and gets two off a clothesline. Ryback gets two off a backbreaker but continues o take his sweet time. We’re at four and a half minutes now and neither guy seems interested in finishing this up in a hurry. Truth pounds him down again and gets two off a missile dropkick. Not that it matters though as Ryback fights up and Shell Shocks Punk for the pin at 5:44.

Rating: D. This was an angle instead of a match which is fine, but it doesn’t make the match anything interesting. Odds are Punk wins the other match and sets the time so that he can get Heyman alone inside the Cell to finally finish this off, but that might be too simple for the writers on this show.

Stephanie runs into the Bellas in the back and gives Brie a wedding present: a match with someone to be named with AJ in the opponent’s corner.

Video on WWE 2K14.

Tons of Funk vs. Real Americans

Cesaro starts with Brodus and a slam puts Antonio down. Off to Tensai to run over Cesaro even more and drop an elbow on him for no cover. A nice monkey flip out of the corner puts Cesaro down but Swagger comes in with a chop block. We hit the chinlock for a bit on Tensai as the match slows way down all of a sudden. Tensai is taken to the corner for the Vader Bomb/double stomp combo for two before we’re right back into the chinlock.

The Americans takes turns on Tensai’s arm until Cesaro hits a great looking gutwrench suplex for two. That man is just scary strong. Tensai finally gets free for the tag off to Brodus but the fans don’t seem all that impressed. Brodus busts out a t-bone suplex of all things for two on Cesaro but Swagger makes the save. Cesaro is back in though and it’s the Neutalizer for the pin on Brodus at 5:30.

Rating: D+. The night of bad matches continue but the Cesaro stuff looked good for the most part. I have no idea why Swagger has to drag this team down so much and he’s trippling Cesaro by mere association at this point. Not much to this one but I’ve seen far worse before.

Post match Cesaro swings Tensai.

Breast cancer still sucks.

Tamina Snuka vs. Brie Bella

Nikki isn’t allowed at ringside but Tamina as AJ with her. Brie is all aggressive tonight and knocks AJ around before taking it out to the floor. Tamina gets in a shot to the ribs and takes it back inside for some shots to the ribs, only to be countered into something like AJ Styles’ Calf Killer.. Ropes are quickly grabbed and Tamina kicks her in the ribs to put Brie down again. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Brie is casually slammed down to the at. Back up and Brie gets up a boot in the corner and an off missile dropkick puts Tamina down. Brie picks up a bit but walks into a big boot out of nowhere for the pin at 4:36.

Rating: C-. For a Divas match this actually wasn’t half bad. Brie is still not a likeable person but she’s getting better in the ring and the little pink outfits don’t hurt anything either. I’m not sure I get the point in having her lose clean like this but maybe it means Brie leaves the title scene.

The beating continues post match with Tamina hitting a Superfly Splash and AJ hooking the Widow’s Peak.

Bryan goes to yell at Stephanie but she tell him to go look after his fiance.

Curtis Axel vs. CM Punk

Punk has to win in under 5:44. Punk quickly starts going for falls by elbowing Axel in the face and going for the cover. Axel comes back with shots to the head but gets caught by a cross body for two. We have under 3:30 to go and Axel puts on a front facelock. Punk comes back with his usual including the knee in the corner but the GTS is countered into a bad looking McGillicutter. Axel starts speeding things up as well, not seeming to realize that he doesn’t need to beat the clock. Punk gets a quick rollup for two with thirty seconds left before the high kick and the GTS connect for the pin at 5:33, meaning Punk gets to pick.

Rating: C+. This worked due to how fast it was but did we really need to have Punk beat the Intercontinental Champion clean in less than six minutes? The story had to go this way but there were other ways they could go to this point. Either way, it sets up the blowoff for the Punk vs. Heyman feud which probably needs to be wrapped up.

Post match Punk makes it Ryback/Heyman vs. Punk inside the Cell.

Daniel Bryan vs. Alberto Del Rio

Non-title of course. Daniel is aggressive to start but gets caught in a quick suplex and chinlock less than two minutes into the match. Bryan suplexes out of it and fires off the kicks, only to get caught in a Backstabber for two. Del Rio avoids a running dropkick in the corner and stomps away as we take a break. Back with Bryan missing the headbutt but almost getting the YES Lock, only to have Del Rio make the ropes. Del Rio comes back with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two as he’s bleeding from the lip a bit.

Bryan explodes out of the corner with a clothesline but Del Rio hits a Codebreaker on the arm for two. A middle rope dropkick gets two for Del Rio and he avoids a charge, sending Bryan shoulder first into the post. The corner enziguri misses though and both guys are down. Bryan fires off the kicks to the chest and the running dropkick in the corner followed by the top rope hurricanrana for two.

Del Rio is kicked to the floor and hit by the FLYING GOAT. Back inside and the missile dropkick has Del Rio in trouble but here’s Orton on the big screen. He apologizes for what happened to Brie earlier but says he’ll go check on her. Orton goes into the trainer’s room and Brie can be heard screaming after the door shuts. Bryan gets rolled up for two but kicks Del Rio in the head and runs to the back for the countout at 16:29.

Rating: C+. The match was ok but this show is so far beyond saving at this point that it doesn’t matter. At least they didn’t do the same distraction leads to a pin sequence and they didn’t job the champion again. This Orton vs. Bryan feud is just not working though and I think everyone knows it.

Bryan runs into the trainer’s room and gets jumped as you would expect.

HHH and Stephanie make the main event No DQ.

Another video on Cena.

Tag Titles: Shield vs. Goldust/Cody Rhodes

No DQ here. The challengers take over to start and work over Rollins with Cody getting two off a dropkick. Reigns interferes with an elbow to Cody’s jaw and the champions take over. Roman stomps Cody down to the floor for two before bringing Rollins back in for some right hands to the head. We hit the armbar for a few moments before Cody comes back with an attempted Alabama Slam out of the corner. Rollins slides down the back but Cody dives into a tag off to Goldust.

Goldie can’t hit Shattered Dreams but settles for a bulldog out of the corner for two on Rollins. Seth ducks something like a cross body to send Goldust to the floor and us to a break. Back with Rollins cranking on the arm even more as Cody plays cheerleader on the apron. A backslide gets two for Goldust but Seth clotheslines him back down. Back to Reigns for a chinlock but Goldust fights up and comes out of the corner with a back elbow. Rollins breaks up the hot tag but dives into a powerslam to put both guys down.

Ambrose’s interference doesn’t stop Cody and the younger brother cleans house. Reigns is sent into the post but Cody only gets two. The moonsault press gets the same and a Disaster Kick knocks Dean out to the floor. A springboard missile dropkick puts Rollins down again but Reigns makes the save. Ambrose comes in to break up Cross Rhodes and the numbers catch up with the challengers.

They load up the TripleBomb but Goldust comes in with a chair for the save. He can’t keep Reigns down though and Roman gets the chair. A big chair shot misses and Goldust scores with a cross body, crushing the chair against Reigns’ chest. Cody tries a Disaster Kick off the steps but gets caught in a running powerbomb against the barricade. Goldust hits atomic drops on the tag champions and a Cactus Clothesline puts Goldust and Reigns on the floor but here’s Ambrose to jump the painted one.

The fans correctly say that this is awesome right before Reigns DESTROYS Goldust with a spear through the barricade. That looked AWESOME. Dean throws Cody and Reigns back into the ring but here’s Big Show through the crowd. Shield grabs chairs but Show cleans house anyway until only Reigns is left standing. Cody kicks Roman into the KO punch and Cody gets the pin and the titles at 19:15.

Rating: A-. Well that helped. This felt like Mankind beating the Rock for the title back in January of 1999 which is about as high of a compliment as I can give a match. This is the kind of moment that this story has been dying for since it started and just like the match at Battleground, it was built up through emotion and it worked like a charm. Great match.

Overall Rating: D+. This was one of the most boring episodes of Raw I can remember in a very long time. There are multiple problems to this whole cycle but first and foremost is that we already got the build up to these matches when we were getting ready for Battleground. The only changes to the title picture are that the match is inside the Cell and Brie Bella, which don’t make up for how uninteresting it is.

On top of that, the three hour issue is rearing its ugly head again. Look at some of the matches tonight like Santino vs. Fandango and the first two tag matches. They’re clearly just there to fill in time on the show and serve absolutely no other purpose. That’s not interesting TV, especially when the matches aren’t even that good. This was the fourth time we’ve seen 3MB vs. Los Matadores in two weeks. That’s how lazy the writing team has gotten, so why should I care about the matches either? Horribly dull show tonight, though the main event did help things a lot.

Results

Randy Orton b. The Miz – RKO

Fandango b. Santino Marella – Rollup

Los Matadores b. 3MB – Double Angle Slam to Slater

Ryback b. R-Truth – Shell Shock

Real Americans b. Tons of Funk – Neutralizer to Tensai

Tamina Snuka b. Brie Bella – Big Boot

CM Punk b. Curtis Axel – GTS

Alberto Del Rio b. Daniel Bryan via countout

Cody Rhodes/Goldust b. Shield – Cody pinned Reigns after a KO Punch from Big Show

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: October 7, 2013
Location: Consol Energy Center, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the night after Battleground and we’re in the same place we were before with the title picture. Orton vs. Bryan went to a no contest due to interference from Big Show, who finally snapped and went against the regime. This likely sets up Bryan vs. Orton III inside the Cell in just three weeks. Other than that the Rhodes Family got a huge win over the Shield, meaning they very well may get a tag title shot. Let’s get to it.

We open with the recap from last night’s main event.

Here’s a ticked off Stephanie to open the show. She talks about how things went bad last night and how she’s livid as a result. Stephanie demands Big Show get out here right now and immediately starts yelling, saying that Big Show can’t do anything right and last night was the result of way to much stress. He can’t manage his finances, his life, his marriage or anything else.

Show says sorry in less than a half hearted way, sending Stephanie even further over the edge. She goes off about saving his mortgage and owning him and his home so Show asks if he can leave now. Stephanie demands that he beg for forgiveness but Show says no. He knocked Bryan out because she told him to. Stephanie says Show is lying because Brad Maddox gave the other. Show says that Brad is their puppet and calls HHH an SOB. Stephanie slaps him about five times and fires him.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Damien Sandow

Sandow takes him into the corner tos tart before taking Dolph down into a chinlock. The announcers talk about the opening segment while JBL tries to keep them on topic. Back up and Ziggler is sent throat first into the ropes before Sandow puts on a headscissors. Ziggler is sent to the floor and we take a break. Back with Damien getting two off something we didn’t see and whipping Dolph into the corner a few times. A Russian legsweep sets up the Wind-Up Elbow followed by another chinlock.

Back up and Ziggler is thrown over the top as this is completely one sided so far. Ziggler is sent into the post for two and it’s back to the chinlock. Dolph fights up and sends Damien shoulder first into the post before firing off some awkward looking punches. They head to the floor for even more punches before going inside for right hands to Sandow in the corner. A dropkick gets two for Ziggler but he gets crotched on top for two. Not that it matters as Ziggler hits a quick Fameasser for the pin at 12:18.

Rating: C-. Not a great match at all but it was acceptable and very different from last night’s match. This was more of a squash for the start until we got to the interesting part. Sandow was looking very frustrated after the match which means changes might be in store for him. Also wasn’t he supposed to have a knee injury?

Stephanie yells at Brad Maddox and demands that he go out and apologize for what happened last night.

Bruno Sammartino came out to see the crowd. DURING THE BREAK??? One of the biggest stars of all time is not brought out DURING A BREAK! Lawler led the crowd in singing Happy Birthday to him.

Alicia Fox/Aksana/Rosa Mendes vs. Natalya/Eva Marie/JoJo

This would be Eva and JoJo’s in ring debuts. Natalya runs over Aksana (who seems to have gotten a haircut) to start before it’s off to Eva. It’s clear that neither girl is very comfortable in the ring as the two of them look like they’re trying to remember every scripted spot. Off to the very blonde Rosa who doesn’t do much better, so here’s Alicia to be the ring general. Eva is sent badly into the corner but avoids a knee, allowing for the tag off to Natalya. House is cleaned and a quick Sharpshooter gets the submission from Fox at 3:27.

Rating: D-. When the best thing you can say is neither rookie horribly botched anything, it’s not a good sign. JoJo and Eva are glorified models and everyone knows it, but they’re on a very scripted reality show so they get to be on Monday Night Raw. Nothing to see here and Rosa doesn’t look nearly as good as a blonde.

Before the girls are out of the ring, Maddox comes out to announce Orton vs. Bryan inside the Cell. There’s going to be a guest referee and the fans can vote on which of three Hall of Famers they want for the job. The first option is Booker T, who says vote for him.

Here’s how to download the WWE App. The announcers even say they know we know how to download an app.

Los Matadores vs. 3MB

This would be Mahal/McIntyre this week. Diego throws Mahal around to start but gets kicked in the head and it’s off to McIntyre. Drew puts on an armbar but Diego pops up and makes the tag off to Fernando to clean house. Apparently the Real Americans are tweeting about Los Matadores. Thankfully this doesn’t last long with the double Angle Slam pinning McIntyre at 2:20.

Post match Slater chases after Torito and gets beaten up, allowing Torito to hurricanrana him down.

We recap the opening segment again.

Here are Heyman and his guys with something to say. Heyman says he’s the only man that can say he beat Punk on his own with his arms behind his back. Punk may have pinning Ryback last night but he had to cheat to do so. Before Heyman can say anything else, here’s Punk with a rebuttal. Punk doesn’t like being accused of being a cheater but says he’ll beat Ryback at any time he wants. He accepts the rematch offer before it’s even offered and says he’ll do it anytime anywhere. Ryback says that Punk is a bully and offeres him a fight right now, but here’s R-Truth to join Punk with an offer of a tag match.

Ryback/Curtis Axel vs. R-Truth/CM Punk

Ryback bails from Punk to start so it’s Axel in first. Curtis is immediately taken down by Punk and it’s off to Truth for some shots of his own. The Heyman guys head to the floor as we take an early break. Back with Axel in trouble from Truth so he brings in Ryback for a bearhug to slow Truth down. Back to Axel for a middle rope ax handle for two followed by some stomping. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Truth is whipped into the corner.

Back to Ryback who rams him into the corner harder than Axel ever could. A slam gets two on Truth and it’s off to an abdominal stretch to stay on the ribs. Truth comes back with a side kick to the face and it’s hot tag Punk to clean house on Axel. There’s the GTS for Curtis and a high kick to Ryback, but it’s back to Truth for the ax kick and the pin on Axel at 12:42.

Rating: C. Basic tag match here which extends one feud which should be extended and keeps another feud going for the sake of keeping it going. Truth vs. Axel has been done already and there’s not need to see them fight again, which is probably why we have to sit through it even more. At least Axel is defending the belt though.

The second candidate for guest referee is Bob Backlund. In his crazy man voice, he says he loves us and we should vote for us because he doesn’t swear. He’s been a good guy in the business but he’s been bad as well, so he doesn’t care who wins the title. If either guy gets out of line, he’ll put them in the crossface chicken wing.

Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton

Orton pounds away to start and sends Kofi into the corner for a quick one count. Randy sends him into the steps and back inside, only to have Kofi send him to the floor in turn. Randy throws him right back outside as we take a break. Back with Orton stomping away and getting two off the backbreaker. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Kofi comes back with a middle rope chop to the head.

Randy punches him into the corner but gets caught in a tornado DDT to put both guys down. Kofi gets two off a high cross body and the SOS gets the same. A springboard cross body is countered into the powerslam from Orton but the Elevated DDT is countered as well. They head to the floor with Kofi being sent into the barricade and the Elevated DDT on the floor knocks Kofi out cold. Back in and the RKO gets the pin at 13:43.

Rating: C. This was fine for the most part with some nice sequences throughout. Kofi is the perfect choice for a match like this as he doesn’t lose anything by getting pinned here. He could lose every match he ever has but will still be a credible guy in the ring. Orton gets a win over a name and looks good in the process so points all around.

Post match here’s Bryan to go after Orton despite having no reason to be furious. Agents and referees break it up.

Vickie yells at someone when Del Rio comes up. He thinks he should be named face of the WWE since he’s the only world champion and all. Del Rio sucks up to her a bit and gives her his scarf before kissing her on the cheek. He leaves and Vickie drops the scarf.

The final candidate is Shawn Michaels. He says that he and HHH are indeed personal friends, but this is about business. Shawn trained Daniel Bryan to wrestle but he wouldn’t let that nor his friendship with HHH sway him. He and Orton don’t like each other so that’s not a factor either. Shawn calls himself H-B-Shizzle, drawing a chant from the fans. He guarantees a new WWE Champion because he wants what’s best for the fans.

Here’s how to download the WWE App for Android.

We recap the opening segment. Again.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Ricardo Rodriguez

RVD is confirmed to be taking time off during the entrances. Non-title of course. Before the match, Vickie says that Alberto’s opponent at HIAC will be……..JOHN CENA? The distraction lets Ricardo get a quick rollup pin at 10 seconds.

Post match Alberto sends Ricardo into the announce table and Pillmanizes his arm.

John Cena tweets about the match which makes it sound official.

Fandango vs. Zack Ryder

Ryder pounds away to start but gets caught in a quick suplex for two. Ryder fights up and hits his usual though before Fandango bails to the floor. Back in and Fandango snaps his neck across the top and hits the guillotine legdrop for the pin at 2:45. Nothing to see here.

Shawn wins the poll by a landslide. Backlund actually got 1/3 of the vote.

Real Americans vs. Santino Marella/Great Khali

Swagger starts with Santino and it’s time to be goofy early on. Santino gets caught in the Real American corner as the fans chant for the bad guys. Cesaro comes in after the Vader Bomb for the double stomp for two. The ice cold tag brings in Khli as the crowd just does not care here. Some chops have Cesaro in trouble but he takes out Khali’s leg and puts on the swing, waking up the crowd immediately. The swing is good for the pin on Khali at 3:52.

Rating: D. Match sucked, swing was awesome, those are my entire thoughts on this stupid match.

Post match Horny gets put in the Swing but Santino makes the save with the Cobra.

Breast cancer sucks.

Here’s Miz for MizTV but before he can get the name out it’s Wyatt time. The lights come out and the Family is in the ring but Miz runs after Bray. He gets in a few shots and gets behind Bray who grabs the Family around their necks and leans over to look at Miz.

Brad begs for mercy from Stephanie when HHH comes in. He’ll be at ringside for the main event tonight.

Shield vs. Cody Rhodes/Goldust/Daniel Bryan

HHH comes out to watch the match. Goldust starts with Rollins and spits in his face before firing off right hands. An atomic drop has Rollins in trouble and it’s off to Cody with a springboard missile dropkick for two. Ambrose comes in for some right hands but gets caught by a knee to the face for two. Back to Goldust to stomp away in the corner and get two off something resembling a bulldog.

Cody comes in again with right hands but Dean takes over in the corner. The moonsault press is countered by Dean shoving Cody off the top and out to the floor as we take a break. Back with Ambrose talking trash to Cody and choking away a bit. Cody breaks up a belly to back superplex attempt and hits the moonsault press to put both guys down. There’s the hot tag to Bryan to speed things up with Rollins.

The moonsault in the corner has Seth confused and a German suplex sets up the top rope hurricanrana for two. Everything breaks down and reigns takes the Disaster Kick. A Cactus Clothesline puts cody and Roman on the floor, leaving Daniel and Seth in the ring. The kick the head sets up the YES Lock but Ambrose hits Cody with a chair for the DQ at 11:00.

Scratch that as HHH says it doesn’t end with a DQ, so restart the match as a No DQ match. The brawling continues and it’s a FLYING GOAT to take out Ambrose and Reigns. Orton comes in from the crowd with an RKO on the floor, giving Rollins the pin on Bryan at 12:22 total.

Rating: C. This didn’t have time to go anywhere and the ending was kind of confusing. I guess it’s to seem like HHH will rig the booking to his benefit but they could have done the same finish without the switch at the end. The match wasn’t all that great due to a lack of time, but it still worked well enough for a screwy finish.

Post match the beating is on but here’s Big Show (to music) to stalk HHH. Shield guards the boss but Show gets in the ring anyway. They swarm him but are easily tossed away, leaving just HHH vs. Show. Shield pops back up though and beats down Show as HHH takes his jacket off. He throws them off again and KO’s HHH, leaving Bryan to stand over the boss to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad but you could see A LOT of filler in this. It’s very clear that HIAC is just Battleground part 2 which is understandable but doesn’t make it interesting. Shawn Michaels as guest referee should help a bit but there’s only so much he can do. Cena returning will help a lot but it’s really early given how bad his arm was. This was a more coherent show, but it still fees like everyone but Bryan is the focus and that’s not good.

Results

Dolph Ziggler b. Damien Sandow – Fameasser

Natalya/JoJo/Eva Marie b. Alicia Fox/Rosa Mendes/Aksana – Sharpshooter to Fox

Los Matadores b. 3MB – Double Angle Slam to McIntyre

CM Punk/R-Truth b. Ryback/Curtis Axel – Ax kick to Axel

Randy Orton b. Kofi Kingston – RKO

Fandango b. Zack Ryder – Guillotine legdrop

Real Americans b. Santino Marella/Great Khali – Cesaro Swing to Khali

Shield b. Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes/Goldust – Rollins pinned Bryan after an RKO from Randy Orton

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

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Rebellion 1999
Date: October 2, 1999
Location: National Indoor Arena, Birmingham, England
Attendance: 11,939
Commentators: Jim Ross, Michael Hayes

We’re back in England again and it’s six days after Unforgiven, so of course the angles are just about the same. These were just glorified house shows with the occasional token title changes. The main event here is Rock vs. HHH in a cage match for the title. That at least sounds interesting. Other than that there isn’t much here. Again, more or less just trying to get done with the 90s but someone requested European shows so it’s two birds with one stone. Let’s get to it.

The theme song is pretty awesome here so I can’t complain there. The arena looks good too so this at least looks and feels like a major show. Also, how often do European fans see something like this? That makes this far more awesome. What is UP with that commentary team though? That was rather odd.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. D’Lo Brown

This is champion vs. champion here as Jarrett is IC Champion and Brown is European Champion. They actually flip a coin to decide which is on the line. Jarrett has a vacuum with him to further the whole anti-women thing. Miss Kitty looks great in a little red dress mind you. He offers 1,000 pounds to any woman that will….do something that he doesn’t actually say.

He does get some nice jabs at the women, including Halloween is at the end of October and not the beginning. The woman he picks is decent looking if nothing else. Ah ok he wants her to vacuum some oatmeal up. We’ll ignore that the vacuum isn’t plugged in that I can tell.

And the decent looking girl is put in the Figure Four. Chyna comes out for the save, and you would think that this should be the match but the coin toss happens and here’s D’Lo to a BIG pop. Dude this guy was legit over back in the day. Ah he’s European Champion and doing the I live in other cities every other week thing. He’s playing to the crowd at least. Jarrett can’t run away. I wish he would in TNA today.

It would get rid of this non-existent “war”. I can’t fathom how over Brown is. I’m rather impressed. He busts out a British Bulldog style suplex to further play to the crowd. See how simple it can be to get the fans behind you? The Sky High connects but both guys are down. Jarrett is good in the ring which is overlooked too often.

The Figure Four doesn’t work and Jarrett can’t figure him out, so he hits him with the vacuum for the pin. That’s the Attitude Era for you I guess. Good night Kitty looks good. Sorry she just popped up on screen. Jarrett challenges Chyna for later in the night.

Rating: B-. I liked it a lot actually. Brown had the crowd into this so that’s the key thing to keep in mind. Also they had me believing that the title could have changed hands. What more can you ask for an opener here? Brown was good at getting the crowd into things which is more important than almost anything, so good choice for the opener.

Godfather vs. Gangrel

No reason at all for this other than to have hot women come out and dance. Yeah they’re just in bikinis here. The women are ok looking at least. After Godfather’s usual stuff, we get Gangrel’s always sweet music.

Something tells me I know who is winning here. Hayes having to make the names Ho Train and Pimp Drop sound intimidating is rather amusing. If nothing else he’s filling in for Lawler as the dirty old man perfectly. Chyna will answer the challenge at the end of this match. Hmm I wonder what she’ll say. The Train and the Drop end this relatively easy.

Rating: D. This was so boring. It could have gone on any house show match and therefore I was rather bored with it. I mean there was nothing going on here and it was just to get “hot” women on screen. Yeah nothing special at all here to put it mildly.

Chyna accepts the challenge and says Jarrett has Va-Chyna Envy. Wow that was BAD. British Bulldog yells at her and gets booed. Bulldog wants a title match.

Val Venis vs. Mark Henry

Why? Why in the world is THIS on PPV? I have a feeling the intro could outlast the match. Make your own Venis lasting long jokes. His thing is about rugby so Becca loves it. Sweet goodness there were a lot of sex based characters back in the 90s. How horny were wrestling fans?

Venis’ character wasn’t one that could last very long. Can you imagine someone trying to make that work today? It would flop big time. Wow this isn’t interesting at all. It’s your run of the mill power vs. speed (I guess) match with Val just beating the tar out of the beached whale known as Henry before the Money Shot ends it in like 4 minutes.

Rating: D. This was also incredibly boring. We’re seeing the problem with these shows: the matches hardly ever make any sense and there’s nothing to them, so why should I want to see them? To be fair though, we weren’t the audience for them. This was just filler.

Smith is looking for Vince. Smith finds Vince. He demands a title shot and is turned down of course. He throws a stool and it hits Stephanie. Ok then. Now in case you didn’t notice, he’s a HEEL. I just want to make it clear that he is a HEEL.

Women’s Title: Tori vs. Jacqueline vs. Luna Vachon vs. Ivory

Tori is the former lesbian stalker that is now just sexy. Jackie is just so irritating and no one cares about her. Ross is freaking over the Bulldog thing to further emphasize that he is a HEEL. Luna is a face. That’s just odd. Wow this division is dying to have Trish and Lita show up, if nothing else for their looks. No tagging here. Please make it quick. Various people do various teams and no one cares.

The division was a bigger joke than it is today if you can believe that. Crowd is more or less dead here but not quite. The ECW Triple Sleeper is added to as it’s a quadruple sleeper. This is just a series of really stupid looking spots in a row. And Ivory hits Jackie with a belt and wins it. Wow I really could not have cared less there. Ross says he didn’t care because of Stephanie. Nice cover up there Jimbo.

Rating: F. These matches had a tendency to be awful. Awful sounds like a nice thing here as this was just annoying to have to sit through. Terrible match to say the least.

We re-air the Bulldog segment from 5 minutes ago that was stupid then and is stupid now. Stephanie is taken away on a stretcher. Bulldog isn’t upset about it at all.

Chris Jericho vs. Road Dogg

This was Jericho’s first feud and Road Dogg is WAY over. He’s a tag champion here if that means anything. Oh and Jericho went off on his back so it’s hurt. Dang it’s weird to think what Jericho would become after what he started as here. Curtis Hughes is still his bodyguard that no one cares about. It also amuses me that Jericho went through some big change in philosophy or whatever and never changed his music.

We’re in the crowd as this is already the most interesting match of the night. Good night they are shoving this Stephanie thing down our freaking throats. When Vince decided people were going to care about his family, he made sure they did. We’re in the ring now. Road Dogg is underrated in the ring too methinks. I always liked his in ring stuff more than Gunn actually which is a rare opinion as far as I can tell.

They’re using a lot of hot shots here which is odd. The crowd likes Jericho a bit I think, which is the problem with him. He’s hard not to like or at least be impressed by. SHUT UP ABOUT FREAKING STEPHANIE!!! I do not care a bit about her or her freaking head injury. SHUT UP ALREADY!

Oh the referee strike ended too. Yeah I don’t care either. This is by far and away the best/most interesting match so far. Could it have anything to do with these two being in a feud? We talk about the match for a bit but screw that. WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT STEPHANIE!!! This is hitting WCW levels of annoying commentators. Jericho can’t get the Walls. He can’t get the Lionsault either.

And there goes the referee. Can we get a clean finish in a match that means something tonight? Is that too much to ask for? A chair shot that might cause paralysis only gets two for Jericho. And of course he’s fine a minute later. A low blow ends it in WEAK fashion.

Rating: B. The ending sucked the life out of it. Give this an ending and it’s WAY better. There was drama here for once which was something totally absent from the rest of the matches. Best match of the night BY FAR.

Fans wait to meet Show and Rock at a record store. Cool.

We have NO UPDATE on Stephanie.

Chyna vs. Jeff Jarrett

This is non-title mind you. If nothing else we get the red dress again. Jarrett is actually hitting her now so it’s an upgrade if nothing else. Pedigree attempt early on doesn’t work and we get an old school catapult. She really was impressive back in the day. And here’s British Bulldog beating up Chyna after about 2 minutes for the CHEAP DQ. I hate this show already. Jarrett gets the Figure Four afterwards. Naturally this is turned into something about Stephanie and her injury.

Rating: N/A. Yes it’s official: we’re watching a house show. This has been nothing but cheap heat and weak finishes. It’s been incredibly boring and nothing has actually happened.

We get to see Rock and Show meet fans. Allegedly there were 10,000 fans there. Cool if true.

Kane vs. Big Show

It’s no DQ here as House Show: England continues. Show jumps over the top rope. That’s impressive. Even Kane’s pyro is weak here. Kane is 182 pounds lighter than Show. That’s SCARY. This is one of the biggest rivalries ever. Think about it: they’ve feuded for like 10 years now. Show would be getting the world title in a month and a half in case you were wondering.

Naturally it’s the battle of the big men here and Big Show hits a dropkick but Kane lands on his feet. I like these matches so there. It’s face vs. face here so there you are. Hey! We have Kane vs. Big Show here in a battle of monsters that looks awesome. LET’S TALK ABOUT STEPHANIE!!! NOW LET’S DO IT AGAIN! Seriously, this is just idiotic at this point. This is formula based stuff but that’s the best thing to do here.

Show drops an audible F Bomb and puts on a Boston Crab all of 6 inches from the ropes. Show lets go of the hold even though as Hayes points out he wouldn’t have to break in a No DQ match. Kane busts out an enziguri. That’s cool if nothing else. Kane hits the top rope clothesline and of course the chokeslam doesn’t hit after it. Even a chair looks small in Show’s hand. Kane kicks it into his face and slams Show for the pin.

Rating: C+. These are usually hard to mess up and this one worked pretty well I thought. The key to these matches is you really don’t have to do all that much and it still looks cool because of their size. These two have good chemistry together so this was as fine as you would expect.

HHH doesn’t care about Bulldog, Jarrett or Chyna. Good to know. Rock is going to get his head kicked in apparently. The big feud would be in 2000. HHH wasn’t that good on the mic yet. Actually he was flat out bad. He’s getting betting though.

X-Pac vs. British Bulldog

Pac gets a POP and a half. Bulldog gets more or less no reaction. As Ross once said, how many ways can you repackage him? Also the lack of anything British isn’t helping him much. No one bought him as a legit title contender at this point as he was just subbing for the injured Taker. And cue up the Stephanie talk. Seriously, Smith is just a guy in jeans and boots. Why should I buy him as a legit threat to the title?

Take a wild guess as to who is going to win here. We still have no updates on Stephanie. More updates on our lack of updates in the next 8 seconds. There’s the suplex from Bulldog. It’s not quite Summerslam 92 but that’s still cool looking. They talk about how weird Bulldog is. He’d be gone in like a month or so.

Well not gone but out of the main event and jobbing. Stephanie will be in the hospital overnight. No update on what’s wrong with her or anything but at least it’s over for the next 20 seconds or so. Bronco Buster hits and I still hate it. There’s your powerslam and as bad as it looked, it ends the match.

Rating: D. This was pointless. Seriously, all night we hear about Bulldog and the title and no one cared about this at all. At least we’re a match closer to this being over. Just an awful show so far.

Crash weighs himself and makes jokes about British English.

Edge/Christian vs. Holly Cousins vs. Acolytes

Elimination rules here. Yeah I don’t care either. Edge and Christian are the number one contenders here but this is a number one contenders match. Sure why not. Ross tries to validate the logic here and of course it makes no sense but whatever. GOOD NIGHT I DO NOT FREAKING CARE ABOUT STEPHANIE!

The Hollies are the superheavyweights at the moment which was a gimmick I always liked to an extent. And they’re already fighting. Edge and Hardcore start us off. With everyone else on the floor, Crash escapes a powerbomb and takes the Clothesline From JBL for the pin and we’re down to the Acolytes and Edge and Christian.

You can hear a lot of called spots tonight. I wonder if that’s a British thing. Guess what we’re talking about now? Just take a guess. When Vince decides to make it about his family, stay clear of him if you care about your life. I love that Farrooq spinebuster.

And the rest is nothing but run of the mill stuff. Christian stays in the ring forever and gets beaten up, hot tag to Edge, Clothesline From JBL, Christian saves, tornado DDT and it’s over. Seriously, that’s it and it took nearly 5 minutes to do that.

Rating: D+. Seriously, I could not care less at this point. This show hasn’t been bad per se. It’s just been so boring and I couldn’t care less if my life depended on it. No one is interested, likely due to jet lag or something like that, the matches mean nothing, and no one is going to talk about this show later on. Why should they put in much effort?

Do you need an explanation of Rock vs. HHH? If you do, why are you reading this? Rock got a title match on Raw and Bulldog cost him the title. Bulldog got one on Smackdown and Rock refereed, costing Bulldog the title. Yep, Bulldog is going to interfere in the cage match isn’t he? Why yes I believe he is.

Stephanie is talked about even more. Let’s look at it again because we haven’t heard about it enough right? Well that and we’re an hour and 45 minutes into the show and we’re at the main event. Yeah this is less than two and a half hours long in total. There’s another reason it sucks.

WWF Title: Rock vs. HHH

Remember it’s a cage match. Rock gets a very big pop. Wow Michael Hayes has been driving me crazy all day. He’s just freaking annoying. Rock says a little something and for the first time tonight the crowd is WAY into it. He talks about Willy Wonka for no apparent reason. Even Rock is off today. An Oompa Loompa is going up HHH apparently. It’s very clear that they’re just stalling for time now.

Ross says that translates on any continent. Yeah because he’s speaking English in an English speaking country he needs a translator. Right Ross. Rock goes after an anti-Rock fan. All in good fun though and if nothing else at least he acknowledges it. That’s a good sign. Good night they’re stalling here. It’s understandable but it’s also annoying. Finally we get it going.

Ok just got something that cleared a lot up: Raw aired on Fridays on Sky in England as they keep talking about last night on Raw. That’s much better now. I think you can only win by escape here. This is your run of the mill pretty good cage match so far. Ross keeps calling the Samoan Drop the Samoan Slam. This just isn’t much at all. It’s ok but you’re just waiting for Bulldog to come in and screw Rock because you know it’s coming.

We do get some solid drama with Rock almost getting out though. Rock Bottom hits and of course both guys are down. Is there a reason we keep going to a wide shot like that? Pedigree hits and both guys are down again. Rock gets out but the referee is knocked down. Of course he is. And we’re in the crowd now. Well at least it’s interesting for the live crowd. That’s not fair actually as this has been a decent match.

Rock gets on the mic and yells at HHH. You know, because he couldn’t use the mic to yell at the referee and point out that he’s out right? HHH is busted open as Rock does some commentary. Rock gets a nice little elbow smash through HHH after jumping from the cage but the table didn’t break. This show needs to end badly. And we go back in the cage because that makes sense.

Why not throw HHH back in and STAY OUTSIDE UNTIL THE REFEREE WAKES UP??? See what I mean about this show making no sense? And there’s Smith to screw the Rock over. Shane comes out and beats up Bulldog which went nowhere. Patterson and Brisco come out to get beaten up. And now he’s beating everyone up. Seriously, the BRITISH BULLDOG is being made to look dominant.

Ah Rock took him down. Much better. Chyna comes out and slams the door on Rock and the overbooking here is idiotic. Yep HHH wins it. Oh and the running powerslam is just a falling slam now. Vince comes out and chains Bulldog and Rock inside. Sure put Rock in there with Bulldog when Rock is spent. That makes PERFECT sense. He comes back and the People’s Elbow gets a very nice pop to end the show.

Rating: B-. This was much better until the way overbooked and idiotic ending. Rock looked like a moron here and it bit him for it. The match itself was pretty good though all things considered. This went ok though and given all the issues it had, the match came off as well as it could have I think.

Overall Rating: F+. The wrestling isn’t terrible, but I cannot remember a show that I cared less about for the life of me. I mean there are TWO decent matches on the whole card. And when I say decent, I mean would be watchable on another show. They’re not good. All night long the important matches had screwjob endings and the bad matches had clean ones.

You could tell there was zero thought or effort put into this and it came off very badly. The Stephanie thing was just idiotic. I mean she was on camera 30 seconds combined and they talked about her more than they did about the Title match. That’s just idiotic all around. This was a house show that you could watch on PPV. Just a horrible show and not worth seeing any of.

 

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Look back at the last few weeks and this isn’t very clear.

Who is the focal point of Raw?  It’s not Bryan, who was only on TV for about five minutes on Monday and got laid out to end the show.

It might be Orton, who is becoming his old self again.

HHH/Stephanie?  Yeah probably, but they’re not really even involved in the main feud.

Punk?  Well he and Heyman are getting as much TV time as anyone so we could go with one of them.

 

In short, it’s really not clear who or what Raw is focused around right now and it’s making for some weaker shows.

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 30, 2013
Location: Mississippi Coast Coliseum, Biloxi, Mississippi
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final show before Battleground a mere fifteen days after Night of Champions. If that’s too fast for you, don’t worry because you’ll get another PPV just three weeks after this Sunday. Tonight will probably just firm up stuff for the show on Sunday, but there’s a chance we’ll get new developments in the potential locker room revolt. Let’s get to it.

It’s breast cancer awareness month again, meaning the middle rope is pink and there’s a graphic on the ramp.

Here’s Punk to open things up and we get a clip from Heyman’s scheme last week, leading to Ryback’s beatdown. Punk talks about how things are often unpredictable around here but once in awhile you can guess what’s happening. Take last week for instance: Punk was in his hometown so of course Heyman was going to come after him. Everyone knew Punk would get jumped if he went after Heyman and that’s exactly what happened.

That doesn’t matter though as the story ends with Punk making Axel go to sleep, showing Ryback what happens to bullies, and when Punk gets his hands on Paul Heyman. The story could end at anytime. It could be at Battleground, or it could be right here tonight. Punk isn’t leaving the ring until he gets a fight with one of Heyman’s guys and he gets rid of Heyman for good.

Cue Brad Maddox (Punk: “You don’t even get an entrance song?”) who says this ultimate showdown isn’t best for business. Punk already has his match with Ryback on Sunday so there’s no need to give him another one now. Maddox is willing to give Punk a match here tonight though…..and here’s Big E. Langston for the first time in weeks. Big E. says he’s Punk’s man if Punk wants aggression and the beating is on. Punk is tossed into the corner but he misses a charge into the post and here’s a referee. The bell is after the break.

CM Punk vs. Big E. Langston

Joined in progress with Punk firing off kicks on the floor before sending Langston back inside for a high cross body for one. Big E. escapes the GTS and slams Punk out of the corner for two. A splash to Punk’s back gets the same and it’s off to a half crab from Big E. CM fights up but gets run over by Langston for two more. A nice looking belly to belly suplex puts Punk down again and Langston is getting a little frustrated.

Punk comes back with a high kick for two but gets taken down by a clothesline for the same. A second splash misses though and it’s Punk coming back with his kicks. Langston is taken down with a neckbreaker and there’s the running knee in the corner. There’s the Macho Elbow and the GTS is good for the clean pin at 5:52 shown.

Rating: C. This was decent but just kind of there for the most part. I’m not sure I get the point of bringing Langston back just for a job to Punk, but at least he was in there with a big star instead of having the same match with Ziggler over and over. Langston was kind of lost in the shuffle for the last month and a half so it’s good to at least see him on TV again.

We recap Cody Rhodes being fired.

Kofi Kingston vs. Fandango

Fandango is in a pink shirt, allowing Cole to list off everything he can about the Susan G. Komen Foundation. We also get part of a compilation of 30 Troubles in Paradise from Youtube, because we need to see a Youtube player on screen instead of just showing the video right? Fandango takes Kofi down with a quick suplex and puts on a chinlock as the fans chant overrated. Kofi spins out of a hiptoss and DDTs Fandango down for a breather. Kingston comes back with some double chops but gets sent into the buckle. Fandango goes up but Kofi moves before the legdrop. Trouble in Paradise is good for the pin at 3:02.

Rating: D. Well that happened. The match was only three minutes long and the only move that was interesting at all was the finisher. Fandango has a fun character but he has almost nothing of note in the ring. The long pants still aren’t working for Kofi and if rumors are to be believed, they’re why he isn’t being pushed as hard anymore. Seriously.

Post match here are the Wyatts with Bray sitting on the stage, asking why these things happen to him. He promises to knock everyone down one by one, so follow the buzzards. Creepy as ever.

Ziggler vs. Sandow is the Kickoff match for Sunday.

The Bellas are in the back when Randy Orton (fangirl pop) comes up to offer some sarcastic congratulations to Brie for her engagement to Daniel Bryan. Orton wants to know the date before it needs to be scheduled before Battleground because Daniel won’t be able to make it after then.

Paul Heyman chastises Renee Young for thinking Punk will be taking him out anytime soon. Heyman says Punk was a nobody who because a Paul Heyman guy before becoming WWE Champion but the forgot what made them the best in the world. Renee says that Axel and Ryback can be seen hiding off camera, meaning Heyman must be planning another trap. Heyman says he has a big plan for tonight’s Raw and if Punk wants to do something about it, go ahead and try.

Los Matadores vs. 3MB

It’s Mahal and Slater here. Los Matadores are named Fernando and Diego and their graphic says they have a miniature bull with them named El Torito. After an over the top intro sequence with a bunch of flips and waving of red capes, we start with Diego (Primo) throwing Mahal around and into the corner for a tag off to Slater.

Heath is thrown around and backdropped but he shoves I think Fernando into the corner for some double teaming. A knee drop has Fernando in trouble and we hit a quick chinlock. Fernando comes back with a headscissors and it’s back to Diego to clean house. Everything breaks down and something resembling a double Angle Slam takes out Slater at 3:58.

Rating: D. I’m not sure what to say here. I was laughing for most of the match, but it wasn’t what I would call funny. It’s definitely in the “so over the top it’s ok” category as they’re playing it completely for laughs, but at the end of the day it’s still Epico and Primo which doesn’t help them that much. They have potential as a comedy team but nothing more than that.

Here are HHH and Stephanie to address the Rhodes family face to face. Goldust comes out in a suit while still wearing the facepaint. Stephanie congratulates Cody on the wedding and hopes he got the Bed Bath and Beyond gift card. HHH wants to know why they’re staring at him because this is what, the fourth opportunity the family has gotten? Cody failed, Goldust failed and Dusty made it about himself. Is Dusty still upset about not being able to do anything outside of Florida or the NWA (I’d be shocked if more than 5% of the live crowd understood that)?

Stephanie says Dusty has a very important job by training new superstars down in Orlando, meaning the future is in Dusty’s hands. Tonight though, the family’s future is in Stephanie and HHH’s hands. They’d like to give Cody and Goldust a job if they can beat Rollins and Reigns this Sunday at Battleground. If they lose though, neither of them will ever work for WWE again, including Dusty.

Big Dust grabs the mic and says he’ll be in his boys’ corner. Stephanie says you’re on but Dusty sounds like he wants a fight. The bosses leave and here’s Shield for the brawl. Dusty tries to bring in a chair but gets beaten down as well. Cody takes the TripleBomb and the Shield stands tall.

Curtis Axel vs. R-Truth

Non-title. Axel pounds away to start but Truth comes back with kicks to the leg. He rains down right hands in the corner, only to be dropped face first onto the buckle to give the champion control again. A nice dropkick from Axel puts Truth down and we hit the chinlock. Truth fights up and hits the suplex into a Stunner for two but misses a dropkick. Before Axel can follow up, Punk’s music hits and the distraction lets Truth hit the Little Jimmy for the pin at 4:20. No Punk.

Rating: D+. Not horrible here but it was all about the false ending which is getting a bit old as a finish to a match. How many times have you seen someone come out for a distraction and the guy getting beaten up badly loses as a result? Truth isn’t horrible or anything but it was pretty obvious he was going to win because he was there as a pawn in the Punk vs. Heyman stuff.

Trish Stratus has had a son. Cool.

Video on Brie Bella and Daniel Bryan, which is an excuse to show clips from Total Divas.

Alicia Fox vs. Brie Bella

Feeling out process to start with Alicia taking over with some choking. The northern lights suplex gets two on Brie as AJ and Tamina are watching in the back. After a quick headscissors from Alicia, Brie comes back with some running kicks and the Bella Buster for the pin at 3:19.

Rating: D+. It’s a Divas match. You do the math here.

Axel is upset but Heyman tells him to calm down. Heyman says Punk is just messing with them but is out of their league. Ryback comes up and says there’s nothing to worry about because they should just give Punk what they want. Heyman tells Ryback to go get something to eat and he’ll come find him in a few minutes. Ryback leaves and Heyman says he sees the world differently since Ryback saved him. Heyman says, and this is a direct quote, that he’s going to go to the ring and propose to Ryback.

We look at Big Show knocking Miz out last week as per Stephanie’s orders.

Big Show, in a suit, says he’s doing ok. We look at a clip from Smackdown with HHH telling Big Show there aren’t many jobs for a guy like him and Big Show nearly knocking HHH out. Show talks about everyone telling him to do the right thing, but that’s easy to say when they’re not in his shoes. How can he pick between his job and his family?

He’s a good person but he has to do evil for the sake of his family. Show rants about having to knock out Dusty Rhodes and now he can’t even look him in the eye. There’s only so much he can take and he’s not going to take it anymore. He’s going to go knock HHH out. Show’s eyes are bugging out and it looks very disturbing.

R-Truth is asking for an Intercontinental Title shot when Big Show comes in and lifts Maddox against the wall, demanding to know where HHH is. Maddox is let down and goes off to find him.

Zack Ryder vs. Alberto Del Rio

Del Rio takes him into the corner before running Ryder over with a shoulder block. Ryder comes back with a clothesline to send Alberto to the floor but misses a plancha to give Del Rio control again. Del Rio pounds away on the floor before heading back inside for a reverse chinlock. There’s the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and it’s back to the chinlock again. Ryder comes back with all of his usual stuff but the Rough Ryder doesn’t connect and Del Rio grabs a German suplex for two. The armbreaker gets the submission at 4:07.

Rating: D+. Yet another match that is long enough to grade but the length brings it down because it feels like they’re just filling in time where they can. This didn’t do anything for Del Rio as he didn’t do anything hardcore before the match on Sunday and everyone beats Ryder anymore. Nothing to see here.

We recap the Rhodes family segment from earlier.

The breast cancer people are recognized.

Here are Ryback and Heyman for the proposal. Heyman says he was man enough to pin Punk at Night of Champions to prove he’s the best in the world, but he’s also an expert in political science. He owns CM Punk, so it was his obligation to squash the rebellion that Punk was starting last week in Chicago. That was getting rid of a dictator which si the right move politically. We get the same clip from earlier of Punk being beaten down by the Heyman guys in case the fans forgot it in the last hour and a half.

Heyman says he’s here because Ryback decided to stand up to the bully that is CM Punk. Ryback says he hates bullies like Punk who took everything Heyman did for him and throw it back in Paul’s face so he had to do something. Heyman talks about how progressive of a society we live in today and he wants more than just a client relationship with Ryback. He wants to make a commitment to Ryback from the opening match to the main event, in sickness and in health and until death do them part.

Paul wants to make an honest man out of Ryback so he takes him by the hand and drops to a knee. Paul’s proposal: will Ryback be the new Paul Heyman guy? Before there’s an answer we get more Punk music and here’s Punk through the crowd. He jumps the barricade….and hurts his knee, collapsing down to the floor in pain. This goes on for awhile until Punk limps to the apron but can’t get in. Heyman goes for it for some stupid reason, allowing Punk to pop up with a kendo stick and lay out Heyman, Ryback and the charging Axel with ease. Axel takes a GTS as Punk hops around to show how good his knee is.

Big Show is still waiting for HHH.

Dolph Ziggler/Usos vs. Shield

On the way to the ring we get another Youtube video to answer the burning question: which Uso is a better dancer? After that greatness, we start with Ziggler getting punched by Ambrose in the corner. Ziggler comes back with a dropkick but a rake to the eyes allows for the tag off to Rollins. The Usos come in with some double teaming and it’s Jimmy hooking an armbar on Seth.

Rollins takes him into the Shield corner and it’s back to Ambrose for some double teaming. Jimmy ducks a double clothesline and tries a double cross body, only to be caught in the air. Jey dropkicks Jimmy’s back to drop both guys down. Everything breaks down and the Usos hit stereo dives to Dean and Roman as we take a break. Back with Seth holding Jimmy in a chinlock. A suplex puts Rollins down but it’s ff to Ambrose before Jimmy can make a tag.

Off to a chinlock from the US Champion as the fans are wanting Ziggler. Roman comes in to complete the trio of chinlockery before something like Cena’s spinning side slam gets two. Jimmy superkicks out of it and FINALLY makes the tag off to Dolph to fire up the crowd. Ziggler loads up the ten straight elbowso n Dean but has to dropkick Rollins out of the air before finishing.

A Fameasser gets two on Ambrose as Reigns makes the Shield save. Jimmy shoves Roman to the floor but Dean breaks up the attempted dive. Off to Rollins as Dean is sent to the floor. Roman makes a blind tag as Dolph Zig Zags Rollins, only to be speared in half for the pin at 12:04.

Rating: B-. Yeah it’s the same formula the Shield has used for months, but there’s nothing wrong with that at all. That spear always looks great and Ziggler went flying as a result this time. Another good match here as everyone has come to expect from Shield. The Usos need to win the tag titles at some point though.

Big Show is still waiting on HHH and even throws some flowers to the floor. Instead he gets cops who don’t like that he’s threatening a WWE employee. Stephanie comes in to say Show is under a lot of pressure and doesn’t understand the consequences of his actions. Stephanie has talked to Show’s wife and implies he can’t perform to her standards as of late if you get Stephanie’s drift. Everyone but Show leaves so Big Show punches a HHH poster.

RVD shows us a Youtube video of his ten most extreme moments. In case you didn’t get it, WWE has a Youtube channel and you need to subscribe to it or your puppy will be lit on fire and your mother will be fed to mutant pigs. Del Rio has no idea what hardcore is about because anything goes. By anything of course they mean chairs to the back, trashcan lids, the steps and a table.

Big Show vs. Shield on Friday.

Santino Marella vs. Antonio Cesaro

Before the match we get the entire giant swing on Titus last week which is still amazing. Cesaro fires off a bunch of elbows to start and stomps on Santino’s chest. A chinlock is quickly broken but Cesaro can’t hook the swing. Santino comes back with his usual stuff before loading up the Cobra. Thankfully Cesaro punches him down and here’s the weekly swing with Santino dropping the stupid sock. The fans are counting the revolutions as they go and we hit an insane 32. Santino stands up but immaturity falls back down, only to roll up Cesaro for the pin at 2:51. Well of course he does.

We look at the marriage announcement between Brie and Bryan again.

Lawler is in the ring to moderate the face to face meeting between Bryan and Orton. Randy talks about how he’s the old Predator again and how dangerous that makes him. He’s genetically superior to the B+ Bryan and will prove it on Sunday. Bryan says that’s A+ all the way from Orton but asks why HHH picked him as the face of the WWE. It’s because he wants Orton to be on magazines and DVDs whereas Bryan would never want to be the best because of something like that.

Orton stops the YES chants before shifting over to Brie Bella. He doesn’t understand what must be wrong with Brie to make her want to be with Bryan, because one day she’ll realize she’s sleeping with a barnyard animal. That’s enough for Bryan and the beating is on. They head to the floor where Orton takes over and sends Bryan into the steps and post. The beating continues and Orton loads up the Elevated DDT on the floor, drawing out Brie to beg for mercy. Orton of course DDTs him on the floor and loads up the announce table. An RKO to Bryan through the table ends the show as Brie freaks out.

Overall Rating: C+. I liked the show a bit more than last week but the WWE Title has gone from the focus of the show to an afterthought. Everything but the world title matches got a great buildup tonight and Battleground looks a lot better as a result. Punk vs. Heyman continues to be probably the feud of the year, the Rhodes and Big Show stuff is well done, and the Shield had another good match. Then there are the world titles though and both matches just feel tacked on. Imagine that: HHH being the focus of two stories and the world titles suffering as a result.

Results

CM Punk b. Big E. Langston – GTS

Kofi Kingston b. Fandango – Trouble in Paradise

Los Matadores b. 3MB – Double falling slam to Slater

R-Truth b. Curtis Axel – Little Jimmy

Brie Bella b. Alicia Fox – Bella Buster

Alberto Del Rio b. Zack Ryder – Cross armbreaker

Shield b. Usos/Dolph Ziggler – Spear to Ziggler

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at: