Thought of the Day: Back In The Day

So I’ve been watching Raw from 1999 and the following becomes obvious.The show is dominated by about 10 acts.  You have Austin, Rock, Vince, Stephanie, Undertaker, Shane, HHH, Shamrock and the Ministry, all making about 5 appearances each.  Today this is called dominating a show while 1999 is called the good old days.

 

Funny how that works.




Monday Night Raw – March 29, 1999: Did We Miss The Wrestlemania Turn Off?

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 29, 1999
Location: Continental Airlines Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 15,213
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the night after Wrestlemania and the big story is Rock losing the WWF Title to Steve Austin. This will only serve to continue the war between Vince and Austin but at the same time we’re continuing Vince vs. Undertaker. We’re starting on the road to Backlash now which would be the final In Your House PPV. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Austin’s road back to the title, including the beer truck attack from last week.

Opening sequence.

Here’s the new champion to open the show to an eruption, wearing black jeans for the only time I ever remember. Austin says he did exactly what he said he would do: head to Philadelphia, go up route 3:16 and burn the Smackdown Hotel to the ground. Now that we’ve got the sentimental crap out of the way, Austin thinks the WWF Title belt isn’t worth all the trouble and aggravation. He wants Vince out here right now so he can relinquish the belt.

Vince cautiously comes to the ring and after taking forever to come down the aisle, Austin hands him the belt like it’s no big deal. Vince goes to leave but Austin says it’s not that easy. Austin has some footage for Vince, which shows McMahon running away with the WWF Title at Breakdown and then taking the Smoking Skull belt with him as a trophy. Vince can have the belt but Austin is the WWF Champion and there’s nothing that can be done about that.

He wants Vince to bring the Smoking Skull belt back because that’s the one he wants. If Vince doesn’t have it back here in two hours, he’ll be getting the beating of his life. McMahon says no because that belt reminds him that he owns a piece of Stone Cold. Austin looks ready for a Stunner but Vince says if Austin attacks him without being provoked, Vince can fire him on the spot. Austin has another clip from last night, showing Vince stomping Austin down in the corner. That sounds like provocation to Austin, so the two hours are ticking away. Vince hits Austin in the back with the belt and runs away.

A lot of people arrive at the show.

Vince sends Stephanie to get the belt.

Sable/Jacqueline vs. Tori/Ivory

Sable is looking GREAT in a half shirt and some tiny shorts. This is a result of Jackie burning Ivory’s face with a cigar last night on Heat. Ivory jumps Jackie to start and there’s a giant swing for good measure. Off to Tori as Ivory chases Terri up the ramp for lighting another cigar. Sable is still holding the belt on the apron which she uses to clock Jackie in the back of the head. Tori gets the worst backslide ever for the pin.

Tori and Sable are about to brawl when the Ministry of Darkness interrupts. Sable can’t escape because there are ropes with huge gaps between them behind her. Taker says he wants to see what she’s got. Sable starts doing the grind so Taker grabs her by the throat. He says he’s got Vince’s meal ticket so he needs to get out here right now to save her.

Vince tells Shane to stay in the back with Stephanie while he takes care of this. Isn’t she supposed to be going to Connecticut? Vince comes out, drops the mic and then heads right back through the curtain. He sprints to the back, screaming for Stephanie but finding no daughter in the dressing room. Vince yells at Shane as we take a break.

Back from a break with Vince telling Shane not to call the cops and saying Stephanie must be in the parking lot. Instead of, you know, going to look for her, he walks around the dressing room. This is very interesting to see when you know what’s coming in the story.

Here’s a sullen X-Pac with something to say. He came back here a year ago because of a phone call from HHH saying DX was falling apart. Then last night HHH turned on him by making a choice. The Outlaws and X-Pac will be out here every week to tell Hunter to suck it until the day they die. HHH’s name may be Hunter, but tonight he’s the hunted. Nice line there.

Vince gets a call from Undertaker saying she really is sugar and spice and everything nice.

Big Show vs. Test

Big Show is freshly face after objecting to Vince yelling at him last night. A boot to the face sets up the chokeslam to end Test in about 30 seconds.

Big Show talks about how Vince is having some personal trauma right now, but Show doesn’t really care. Vince thought that he owned Big Show but no one owns him at all. It was Vince that said when Big Show got to the WWF, everything was going to change. Starting tonight, Vince is going to eat those words.

Vince sends Shamrock to find Stephanie.

Hardcore Title: Steve Williams vs. Hardcore Holly

Holly won the title back last week and is defending here as a result of accidentally breaking JR’s broadcast table a few weeks back. Williams pounds Holly into the corner to start but Holly comes back with kicks of his own. Steve comes back with a quick belly to belly suplex as JR gets on (Spanish) commentary to rant about wanting to go back to work. Williams goes after Holly’s leg, wrapping it around the post for good measure.

Nothing about this has been hardcore so far. A knee crusher has Holly in trouble but he comes back with a DDT before rolling to the outside. Here’s a table but Williams hits a quick powerslam to drive Holly through, only to take out the referee in the process. Cue Al Snow with a frying pan to lay out Williams to keep the title on Holly.

Rating: D. They managed to make a hardcore match boring. That’s really hard to do when you think about how insane some of these matches could be. The JR/Steve Williams stuff needs to wrap up soon as there’s just nothing interesting at all in there. People don’t want to boo JR and these heel turns never work for him.

The Rock vs. Billy Gunn

Shane joins commentary. Rock powers Billy into the corner and fires off right hands as Shane goes nuts. Billy comes back with a drop toehold and a dropkick before working on the arm for a bit. Rock slugs Gunn down as Shane tells everyone to focus. A suplex gets two for the Great One and there’s a Stun Gun to Gunn for two more. They head outside with Billy being sent into the barricade and Rock jumping on commentary, only to have Billy flash him for no apparent reason. Back in and Billy fires off some right hands, only to be caught in the Rock Bottom and the People’s Elbow (BIG ovation) for the pin.

Rating: D+. Rock’s face turn is imminent at this point for the same reasons it happened last time: you can’t hold that kind of charisma down. The other thing to remember is that Rock never really turned face in 1998. He just started fighting heels but still talked the same trash and acted arrogant before joining up with Vince and company. Billy Gunn continues to get on my nerves.

Shamrock says he’ll beat the information out of whomever he has to in order to get Vince’s baby girl back.

Austin watches the clock.

Ken Shamrock vs. Gangrel

Shamrock starts fast and wins a quick slugout with a clothesline. Gangrel comes back with a quick powerslam for two and a DDT for the same. Ken fires off a dropkick and demands to know where Stephanie is. He takes Gangrel to the floor and sends him into the steps before shoving the referee for getting in Shamrock’s way.

Gangrel is rammed into various objects but still says he doesn’t know where she is. Some whips into the steps soften Gangrel up a bit more before we head back inside for right hands and more interrogation. The fans get distracted by something so Shamrock stalls for a bit. The belly to belly sets up an ankle lock on Gangrel to end the massacre.

Rating: D+. This was much more of a match than an angle which makes it hard to grade. Gangrel was there as a warm body for Shamrock to beat on which is probably the best idea given his rather limited in ring skills. At least this short match had a purpose, unlike a lot of other stuff you’ll see around here.

Post match Edge and Christian come after Shamrock and the lights go out. Shamrock gets a blood bath but he grabs Christian by the ankle. He cranks on the hold until Christian says Stephanie is in the basement.

Post break Shamrock is in the basement to find the lost princess.

Intercontinental Title: Road Dogg vs. Goldust

Feeling out process to start until Ryan Shamrock heads to the ring, only to be sent to the back by Blue Meanie. Roadie pounds Goldie into the corner before Goldust cranks on the champion’s arm. Road Dogg comes back with a rollup for two and we stop again. Shattered Dreams is blocked by the referee but Road Dogg goes after Blue Meanie for some reason. Meanie accidentally splashes Goldust and Road Dogg bulldogs Meanie into Goldust’s crotch. The juke n jive sets up the shaky knee drop, only to have to escape the Curtain Call. Meanie clocks Dogg with the belt, allowing the Curtain Call to connect for the title.

Rating: D. How in the world do you overbook a match that runs four minutes? Also I don’t get the mentality of having the title change here instead of doing it the night before at WRESTLEMANIA. These guys were the last two in the fourway last night, so why not give Goldie the title there? Nothing match which was WAY overdone.

Post match Goldust says that was a raging climax, which was the tagline of Wrestlemania last night. He says we’ll know something very soon, whatever that means.

Shamrock finds Stephanie crying with the Ministry mark on her forehead.

Stephanie cries on her dad’s shoulder. That’s a relief. It had been a full ten minutes since we saw Vince.

Tag Titles: Owen Hart/Jeff Jarrett vs. Legion of Doom

It’s a brawl to start of course with the LOD (flanked by Paul Ellering) cleaning house to start. Animal slams Jeff down for two and we’re ready to go. The fans call Owen a nugget but an Animal suplex quiets them down. Jarrett’s knee to the back allows Owen to kick Animal’s head off to take over before it’s off to Jeff. Animal comes back with a double clothesline and cleans house as Hawk finally comes in to help out. The Doomsday Device puts Owen down but there’s no referee. Jeff cracks the guitar over Hawk’s head and puts Owen on top to retain the belts.

Vince thanks Shamrock for his services and Shane has the Smoking Skull belt. Vince doesn’t care because this night is over. Shane is tasked with giving the belt back to Austin. They leave but Shane says tonight isn’t over.

X-Pac vs. HHH

Shane is out here with HHH, meaning odds are he didn’t give Austin the belt back yet. It’s a big brawl to start of course with HHH firing off right hands to take over. Pac comes back with some kicks and chops, only to be taken down by the knee to the face. Another kick to the face puts HHH down but he misses the Bronco Buster. The facebuster puts Pac down again but he comes back with a spinwheel kick and the flipping clothesline, but Pac wants to chase Shane. He runs right into a Chyna clothesline, drawing the fast DQ.

Rating: C-. Nothing match again here as it’s barely long enough to rate. The DX split was fine as they had pretty much done all they could have done, but HHH wasn’t ready to go to that next level yet. Feuding with X-Pac didn’t help either as Pac was nothing more than a midcarder, but at least he was over so the fans cared.

Shane, HHH and Chyna beat X-Pac down post match until Kane makes the save. Shane actually goes after him but the distraction doesn’t help HHH all that much. Chyna’s distraction on the other hand lets HHH hit Kane in the head with a chair for not much effect.

Shane stays in the ring for the big closing number with Austin. He says they’re both champions and if Austin wants his belt, all he has to do is look around the waist of the most electrifying man in sports entertainment. Cue Rock with the title over his shoulder, making Shane look like a mean old liar. Rock gives Austin credit before changing his mind because there’s nobody (crowd: “NOBODY!” Rock: “Don’t do that.”) that can take this belt from him. He may have lost last night, but it took TWO Stunners to do it.

Cue Austin for the fight with Rock sending him into the announce table. They head back inside and there’s a Stunner for Shane, only to have Rock take him down again. The Skull belt to the head drops Austin and here’s HHH to help with the beatdown. Shamrock and Test are here as well but Big Show makes the save, allowing Austin to stand back while he cleans house. A chokeslam to HHH ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. If you didn’t know any better, odds are you wouldn’t know this wasn’t the show after Wrestlemania. What happened tonight? Austin vs. Rock and Undertaker vs. Vince continued, a midcard title changed hands, and we had two show long angles, only of which barely had a resolution at all. This could have been any given Raw after any given PPV, which is really hard to get accept the night after Wrestlemania. Not a bad show, but I was expecting something very different.

 

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Monday Night Raw – September 23, 2013: Now We Sound The Drums Of War

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 23, 2013
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Things are getting interesting around here with the locker room starting to revolt against the HHH regime. The main story at the moment sees a group of ten guys standing up to the boss last week, setting the stage for a potential showdown between HHH and pretty much everyone else. This has the potential to be a very fun time for the WWE and Raw in particular. Let’s get to it.

We open with an in memory graphic of Angelo Savoldi, the world’s oldest professional wrestler, who died over the weekend at age 99.

We recap the events of Night of Champions as well as the Bryan/Armstrong segment resulting in Bryan being stripped of the title. Some of the locker room revolted, setting the stage for tonight.

The ten men who revolted (Prime Time Players, Usos, Zack Ryder, Kofi Kingston, R-Truth, Rob Van Dam, Dolph Ziggler and Justin Gabriel) are on the stage as HHH and Stephanie head to the ring. The bosses welcome us to the show before turning their attention to the guys on the stage. Shield is standing guard as usual. HHH thanks the guys for finally standing up for what they believe in. RVD says they were fighting for Daniel Bryan because HHH would have done the same thing to them had the roles been reversed.

HHH thinks they’re supposed to be fighting to be WWE Champion, not for the WWE Champion. The bosses ask why none of them are the face of the WWE, but HHH answers for them: it’s because of the Shield. Therefore, tonight it’s an elimination handicap match with Daniel Bryan joining the ten of them. Also there’s going to be an audience poll on the WWE App to determine who faces Orton here tonight: Truth, Ziggler or RVD.

Cole shows us how to install the WWE App because we’re not bright enough to do that ourselves.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Kofi Kingston

Non-title of course. Del Rio shoulder blocks him down to start but Kofi comes back with the double leapfrog, only to be sent into the corner before he can hit the jumping back elbow. A running clothesline sends Del Rio to the floor and there’s a BIG flip dive (much more like a flip clothesline with Kofi landing on his feet) to take Alberto out. Back in and Alberto hits a hard kick to the head before taking it to the mat for a bit. Another kick to the head has Kofi in trouble but he dropkicks Alberto the floor, setting up the aborted suicide dive as we take a break.

Back with Del Rio kicking Kofi in the back for two and cranking on the arm. Apparently Kofi sent the arm into the post during the break. Del Rio gets caught on the middle rope but pulls Kingston down into the armbreaker on the ropes. Del Rio clotheslines Kofi down and goes up, only to jump into a dropkick which missed by nearly a foot. Some more dropkicks and the SOS are good for two on Alberto and the Boom Drop keeps the champion in trouble.

Trouble in Paradise is countered into a German suplex for two and a double stomp has Kofi down again. Kofi counters the armbreaker and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker into something Cole calls a DDT for two. Kingston misses a springboard cross body, landing on the bad arm. Del Rio sends it into the post, hits a Codebreaker to the arm and the armbreaker gets the tap at 14:03.

Rating: C+. Nice match here as Kofi is continually good for a solid performance against anyone you put him against. Getting wins like this will only help Del Rio get his credibility back but he’s too far gone to be saved now. It’s nice to see the WHC get some exposure like this though so not much to complain about here.

Miz is about to talk about Orton’s attack last week when HHH comes in. He laughs about Miz being hurt last week so tonight it’s MizTV with Big Show as guest.

We recap the Rhodes’ family troubles over the last few weeks.

Wyatt Family vs. Prime Time Players

You could have known that the Wyatts were in action tonight had you downloaded the WWE App. Or you could have just watched the show and found out like everyone else. The Players get a jobber entrance and the squashing begins early. Harper pounds on Young to start before bringing in Rowan, who is still wearing the mask. A hard slam leads to the mask being revealed as Young is destroyed even more.

A backbreaker from Rowan and it’s back to harper who stops Young’s comeback attempt. There go the lights for some reason but it appears to be an electrical glitch as they’re back a few seconds later. Darren kicks Luke away and makes the tag off to Titus to clean house. Darren hits a Cactus Clothesline to take Rowan to the floor but Harper catches Titus with the discus lariat for the pin at 4:26.

Rating: D+. Long squash here as the Players’ push appears to be in trouble. The Wyatts continue to be awesome with that discus lariat becoming quite the weapon. Introducing the Sister Abigail plot point for Bray was a nice recharge for the characters and hopefully they’ll add more to it soon.

Post match Bray hits Sister Abigail on Young.

Time for MizTV with Big Show. Miz is still favoring his arm after the Orton attack last week. He says he’d usually welcome us to the show but right now he’s banged up and ticked off. It’s a lot easier to put him down than to keep him down and payback is coming. Miz moves on to the Big Show/Dusty Rhodes segment from last week before bringing out the giant. Miz immediately asks Big Show how he could have done that last week before saying if Show didn’t, Shield would have destroyed Dusty instead.

HHH and Stephanie are trying to break Big Show because he’s the biggest guy in the locker room but now everyone is starting to step up. It’s time for Big Show to step up to that witch, so here’s Stephanie to her horrid music. She calls Miz’s statements slander but Miz isn’t scared. Stephanie talks about Miz’s failures and calls him a utility player. He’s good for all the promotional stuff but last week in his hometown, Miz failed his family, his friends and himself. Big Show is forced to knock Miz out before storming off.

Rob Van Dam wins the poll to face Orton in a landslide.

Randy Orton vs. Rob Van Dam

Orton takes him into the corner to start but has to bail to the floor to avoid a spin kick. Back in and RVD hits a kick in the corner to send Randy right back to the floor. Orton sends him face first into the apron as we take a quick break. Back with Orton getting two off a suplex and putting on a chinlock. RVD comes back with some kicks and Rolling Thunder for two. Orton charges into a boot and gets caught with the split legged moonsault, only to come back with the Elevated DDT.

The RKO is countered with a kick to the face and a rollup is good for two on Randy. The middle rope kick to the face puts Orton down but he’s back up before Rob can launch the Five Star. Instead it’s the cannonball to put Orton down but he pops up to crotch Rob in the corner. A kick to the head puts Rob on the floor and Orton sends Rob into various objects until it’s a double countout at 10:45.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t bad but it was all to set up the post match stuff. Rob was looking good out there and Orton was his usual solid self. They actually had some chemistry together and the match was pretty entertaining as a result. A double countout wasn’t necessary as Van Dam might be leaving soon, but at least Orton didn’t lose.

Orton keeps up the attack and destroys Van Dam even more, sending him into the barricade, steps and announce table before taking Rob’s unconscious body back inside. A top rope Elevated DDT knocks Rob silly, possibly to write him off TV since his 90 day deal is coming up soon. Appropriately enough, Orton put Van Dam out in 2007 for Rob’s first exit.

Los Matadores are here next week!

The announcers show Del Rio attacking RVD during the break on the WWE App. He put Rob in the armbreaker for a few seconds but was pulled off by referees.

Randy Orton comes up to the Bellas to offer himself as a replacement man once he takes out Daniel Bryan. Brie turns him down and Orton talks some more trash.

We get some clips from HHH and Stephanie’s wedding as an ad for the new HHH DVD. Stephanie is watching in the back when AJ comes in to see her. Stephanie gives AJ a copy of the new DVD to show her what a real wedding looks like. AJ wants the Total Divas to go away like the reality show so Stephanie glares at her. Stephanie threatens to strip AJ of the title if she doesn’t fight tonight. Again, who am I supposed to cheer for in AJ vs. Total Divas? It’s never been made clear.

Santino Marella vs. Fandango

Naturally we start with dancing until Fandango takes him down and stomps away. Santino hurts his head trying to nip up and it’s off to a body scissors. The fans chant overrated which Cole says is actually Summer Rae. Back up for an abdominal stretch but Santino hip tosses out and starts his usual offense. A Summer distraction lets Fandango suplex Santino down and the guillotine legdrop gets the pin at 3:50.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing of note but we got to look at Summer in a very revealing outfit and the comedy goof gets pinned. What more can you ask for in less than four minutes? Fandango’s push coming back would be fine but he doesn’t really have anything to go after given how all the champions are heels.

Here’s Punk, clad in a Chicago Blackhawks jersey, for the first time since Night of Champions. During the entrance we’re told it’s Punk vs. Ryback at Battleground. Punk is annoyed at the audience for ruining his bad mood because he hasn’t smiled in eight days. He tried to get the Stanley Cup here tonight but he couldn’t quite get it. It feels like he let everyone down just like he did in Detroit last weekend. It’s going to read in Gray’s Sports Almanac that Paul Heyman beat him.

Punk isn’t smart enough to stay down a lot of the time but maybe he can’t do this anymore. Maybe he doesn’t deserve to wear this jersey anymore or to wrestle in front of the best crowd in the world or to say he’s from Chicago anymore. Then he comes out here and remembers being down 3-1 against the Detroit Redwings and coming back to win the series in seven games. That’s the Chicago way: if you get beaten you come back and keep fighting. Punk wants to fight anyone right now but here’s Heyman on a motorized scooter, singing what sounds like a Frank Sinatra song.

Heyman does his catchphrases but the fans finish it off for him in a funny bit. Punk threatens Heyman with an even worse beating than at Night of Champions because there are thousands of people here that will bail him out of jail. Heyman reminds us that he beat Punk but it’s due to geography. See, Chicago is the Second City while the first city is Heyman’s hometown: New York City.

We see a shot of Paul getting the pin at the PPV, triggering a walrus chant. Heyman says he may be a walrus, but he pinned the shark in Detroit. Punk wants to know if Heyman’s goons can get to him before Punk gets to Heyman, because he only needs two seconds to rip Heyman’s face off. Paul says he beat Punk with both hands tied behind his back and goes to leave but the scooter doesn’t work.

Punk goes after him but Ryback and Axel save their boss just in time. Punk makes a comeback and sends Axel into the set before diving off the stage to take out Ryback. The numbers catch up to him though and Ryback rips off the Blackhawks jersey. Punk is thrown onto the equipment and onto the edge of a table for good measure. Heyman stands up and jumps off the ramp, revealing that it was of course a ruse. Ryback says this is what happens to bullies.

Total Divas vs. AJ Lee/Alicia Fox/Layla/Aksana

Nikki is back in the ring now. Punk is helped to the back during the entrances. Natalya and Alicia get things going and Fox has to escape the Sharpshooter after just a few seconds. A big boot in the corner gets two for Alicia and it’s off to the chinlock. Natalya goes after the leg and it’s off to Brie for some dropkicks. Off to AJ for some kicks, only to get caught in the Bella Buster for the pin at 1:55. Great, this feud gets to continue.

We get a montage of RKO’s from the Youtube channel. Thanks for adding in that Youtube detail. It really made the video that much better.

Shield says their backs are against the walls but that means they always win.

Here’s Bryan with something to say. He talks about the allegations of a fast count from last week but doesn’t think it holds up. Why would you need a fast count when the other person was out cold? Bryan doesn’t really care though because he’s taking back the title in two weeks at Battleground. There won’t be any fast counts or conspiracies. After Orton wakes up, the only thing he’ll be hearing is YES. Cue Shield for the attack but Cody Rhodes and Goldust jump the barricade to go after them, only to be dragged off by security.

Shield vs. Daniel Bryan/Usos/Prime Time Players/Zack Ryder/Kofi Kingston/Dolph Ziggler/Rob Van Dam/R-Truth/Justin Gabriel

Elimination rules here. Jimmy Uso starts against Rollins but it’s quickly off to Ziggler. Kofi and Rob are both here though very taped up. The fans are way behind Ziggler but Ambrose gets the tag to take over. Dean takes him into the corner to bring in Reigns for the power strikes. Back to Rollins for a kick to the chest but the now legal Ambrose gets dropkicked down. The tag brings in Van Dam but a quick shots to the ribs slows him down. Van Dam misses a charge into the post and the bulldog driver makes it 10-3 at 2:57.

Back with Kofi’s hold on Rollins being broken before it’s back to Ambrose to work on Kofi’s injured arm. Dean pounds away in the corner but Kofi flips out of a belly to back suplex. Ambrose goes right back to the bad shoulder to stop the hot tag though and the bulldog driver eliminates Kingston at 8:06 (all times total).

Titus comes in next to throw Ambrose around before it’s off to Reigns for the power showdown. Roman easily shoves him into the corner for some cheap shots from Rollins as Shield takes over again. This has been one sided so far. Titus gets away for a few moments but the spear takes him out at 9:44. Gabriel comes in and gets speared out 15 seconds later.

It’s Ryder in now with some more luck, including the knees to the face and the middle rope dropkick, but a spear takes Ryder out at 10:30. GREAT sequence there by Reigns. Bryan comes in with the kicks and clothesline to put Reigns down followed by the running dropkicks in the corner. Jimmy Uso hits a SWEET superkick and Jey’s superfly splash eliminates Reigns at 11:24. That’s the first time Reigns has been pinned in WWE.

Back from another break with Rollins dropping Young face first onto the buckle before it’s back to Ambrose for the dropkick against the ropes. To recap right now it’s Rollins/Ambrose vs. Young/Bryan/Ziggler/Usos/R-Truth. Rollins hooks a chinlock before bringing Dean back in, only to have Young score with a belly to belly. The northern lights suplex gets two for Darren but Ambrose escapes the Gut Check. A blind tag brings in Rollins for the top rope knee to eliminate Young at 17:16.

Back to Ziggler to a BIG ovation as he scores with a neckbreaker. Ziggler goes nuts but charges into a release Downward Spiral into the middle rope to give Dean two. Ziggler pops back up and hits a Zig Zag out of nowhere to make it 5-1 at 18:45. It’s Rollins vs. Ziggler/Usos/Truth/Bryan. Seth slams Ziggler down and puts on a chinlock but Ziggler comes back with a running DDT to put both guys down. The tag brings in Truth for the first time to clean what’s left of the house, getting two off the sitout gordbuster. Rollins comes back with a kick to the ribs and the running curbstomp for the elimination at 11:12.

It’s still 4-1 so Bryan sends one guy to each apron in a Shield-esque move. Everyone comes in at the same time for the big beatdown, but here’s Ambrose to brawl with Ziggler. The Usos superkick Reigns to the floor and hit BIG stereo dives to take the other Shield members out. Rollins jumps Bryan from behind and puts him on top, only to be shoved off for the flying headbutt. The running knee ends Rollins at 23:07 for the final pin.

Rating: B. Really fun match here with an amazing performance by Reigns in such a short amount of time. That’s the kind of thing that got Diesel over back in the day and it set up a good ending to the match here. Bryan gets to stand tall and everyone looked great out there. Can you ask for something better?

Overall Rating: B-. The wrestling wasn’t much for the most part, but the addition of a show long angle really helped things out here. The locker room revolting is a nice change of pace as you can only have Bryan vs. the world for so long. Other than that the Heyman vs. Punk segment worked really well for me and gives Punk more of a personal reason to want to take out Ryback. Good show this week and one of the better ones in awhile.

Results

Alberto Del Rio b. Kofi Kingston – Cross Armbreakerer

Wyatt Family b. Prime Time Players – Discus lariat to O’Neil

Randy Orton vs. Rob Van Dam went to a double countout

Fandango b. Santino Marella – Guillotine legdrop

Total Divas b. AJ Lee/Aksana/Layla/Alicia Fox – Bella Buster to Lee

Daniel Bryan/Usos/Prime Time Players/Justin Gabriel/R-Truth/Zack Ryder/Dolph Ziggler/Rob Van Dam/R-Truth b. Shield – Running knee to Rollins

 

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Monday Night Raw – September 16, 2013: Stripping Titles, Locker Room Revolts And Punching Old Men

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 16, 2013
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the night after Night of Champions and Daniel Bryan is once again WWE Champion in a pretty big surprise. The main story though is the fast count that won Bryan the title as well as the potential controversy due to there being a second referee in the match, even though the original counted the fall. Other than that we have Ryback as the new Heyman guy to help Paul in his war with CM Punk. Let’s get to it.

We open with clips from the main events last night, focusing on Ryback joining Heyman and Bryan winning the title.

Here’s Daniel Bryan to open the show with the belt around his waist, I believe for the first time. Bryan looks at the belt before holding it above his head as the music ends. The fans chant for Bryan before he can speak and he calls them awesome. We hit the YES chant but here’s HHH before he can get to ten or so of them. A ticked off Game marches to the ring and says that he needs to address the 800lb gorilla in the ring. Everyone on social media and in the live audience tonight are talking about it, so referee Scott Armstrong needs to get out here right now.

We look at the end of the main event last night with HHH showing the difference between a count for Orton and a count for Bryan with the winning pin being much faster than the other one. Armstrong admits that it was a fast count and that it was a mistake. HHH thinks there’s more to it and Scott apparently says they’re onto us Daniel.

HHH sends Scott away and Bryan is confused. The title is immediately held up but he’s not giving it to Orton either. Bryan refuses to hand it over but here’s a power walking Orton to the ring. HHH says he has this one and tells Bryan to hand over the title before it’s taken from him. Bryan looks at the belt and says NO, only to take the RKO to put him down. Orton stands over Bryan after HHH leaves.

Back with HHH and Stephanie badmouthing Bryan when Orton comes in and demands his title back. Stephanie goes into beast mode to yell at him for his lack of respect. Orton isn’t going to be champion until he finds his old self.

Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler

Non-title here I believe in a night of Champions rematch. Ziggler is from around these parts so the pop is solid. Feeling out process to start with Ambrose taking him into the corner, only to have Dolph come back with right hands and a shoulder block. A cross body and more right hands have Dan in trouble and a Cactus Clothesline puts both guys on the floor. Back in and we hit the sleeper on the champion but Ambrose counters into one of his own. Ziggler jawbreaks out and stomps Dean in the corner, only to be whipped hard over the corner and out to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Ambrose pounding Dolph down for two before we hit a leg lock with Dean’s knee in Ziggler’s back. Ambrose can’t quite hook a surfboard so he shifts over into a dragon sleeper in a nice quick change to avoid a botch. Ziggler comes back with right hands but gets sent out to the apron. Dean takes him to the top for the back rake and a butterfly superplex for two.

Off to a kind of half nelson arm lock followed by an attempt at a cobra clutch. Ziggler headbutts his way to freedom and a jumping DDT puts both guys down. Dolph rains down rights and lefts in the corner and takes Ambrose down with a clothesline. There are the ten elbow drops which is a good spot but takes too long. Ambrose comes right back with a spinebuster for two before pulling Ziggler off the middle rope with a crash. The bulldog driver is countered and the Zig Zag is good for the pin at 11:55.

Rating: C+. These guys have decent chemistry together but I’m not wild on the pin the champion to get the shot idea. Not only has it been done to death, but it keeps up the 50/50 booking idea which doesn’t do anything for either guy. Still though, decent match and it was a good idea to get Ziggler back on track.

Big Show is in Brad Maddox’s office, waiting on HHH and Stephanie. Back from a brake with the McMahons in the office, apparently having told Brad to make Bryan vs. Reigns tonight. Dusty Rhodes is in the building and HHH goes to meet him. Stephanie reminds us of the Big Show is broke storyline and tells him to stay in her office tonight until she needs him.

We talk about Punk vs. Heyman from last night.

Fandango vs. R-Truth

Yes they’ve somehow gotten two matches out of that dance off from Smackdown. After some quick dancing, Truth takes over with a quick right hand and a hip toss. Fandango is sent to the floor before coming back in with shots to the back. JBL is still complaining about the judge in the Floyd Mayweather fight. We hit the chinlock on truth as Cole explains the opening segment again. Truth comes back with a suplex into a Stunner for two before sending Fandango to the apron. The dancer comes back with an enziguri and the guillotine legdrop for the pin at 3:28.

Rating: D. Well that was boring. Summer Rae looked great but there’s not much else to say about most of these matches. None of these guys ever really go anywhere but at least it’s giving them something to do other than lose to bigger names. The match was nothing though as that dance off’s legs ended about five seconds after the segment from Smackdown stopped.

Dusty Rhodes is in the back and everyone loves him.

Here’s Big Dust for the latest chapter in the McMahons vs. the Rhodes families. Dusty says he’s here tonight as Virgil Runnels, not the American Dream. He talks about raising two good boys and spending all of his money to take care of them. Somehow though you find your way to do it because of the love you have for your boys. This isn’t about Dusty but rather about Cody losing his job for the sake of good business.

Dusty talks about how important children are to anyone and about Cody being a multiple time Intercontinental and world (tag team) champion before he was 22 years old. Dusty didn’t ask for this meeting but apparently has been given a business offer to get Cody’s job back, so Stephanie needs to get out here to make the offer.

Stephanie tells Virgil (just call him Dusty) that it’s an honor to see him and has a Bed Bath and Beyond gift card for Cody’s wedding gift. Stephanie talks about Dusty being the son of a plumber. “I can relate to that. I’m the daughter of a genius.” She and HHH are willing to offer Cody his job back, or they can give it to Goldust. It’s up to dusty but he refuses to make the decision.

They both talk over each other until Stephanie says he can pick the son who has done everything right or the son who he neglected all those years. Dusty asks about Stephanie’s daughters and says she can’t pick one of them to be her favorite so he’s not picking Goldust or Cody. Stephanie says it’s typical Dusty for him to make it all about himself. Dusty tells Stephanie where she can go….and here’s Shield.

They surround the ring but Stephanie calls them off. She tells Big Show to come to the ring and says Dusty has another choice: take the beating from Shield or be knocked out by Big Show. Again Dusty won’t pick so Stephanie tells Big Show to knock him out. Show starts crying again so Shield is told to go after Dusty. Show says no so Shield all gets chairs but Show hugs Dusty and knocks him, only to hug him down to the ground before Dusty collapses.

Post break Dusty is taken to an ambulance and Big Show rides with him.

Brie Bella/Cameron/Naomi vs. Aksana/Layla/Alicia Fox

AJ and Natalya are on commentary as Naomi starts with Layla. Off to Cameron as apparently Natalya’s headset doesn’t work. Layla kicks Cameron in the ribs to take over and it’s off to Aksana for some choking in the corner. Alicia comes in for a single whip into the corner before it’s back to Layla. The “wrestlers” work over Cameron and Natalya finally gets a headset to complain about AJ causing the audio problems. Everything breaks down and Brie hits an X Factor for the pin on Aksana at 2:58. This was a mess.

We look at how Sandow won MITB by showing Rhodes down for some reason.

Damien Sandow vs. Rob Van Dam

Sandow knocks him down into the corner to start and drives in some left hands for two. The Russian legsweep and the Wind-Up elbow are good for two and we hit the chinlock. Rob easily fights up and hits a hurricanrana followed by some kicks to the face to take Sandow down. Rolling Thunder hits knees to give Damien two and the stepover kick puts Damien down. A Five Star keeps Damien as a loser at 2:40. Sandow’s music plays at first in an error.

The announcers recap the show so far.

Scott Armstrong comes in to apologize to HHH and gets fired.

The Miz vs. Randy Orton

Miz’s family is in the front row when Orton jumps him and rams Miz into the steps. Orton destroys him and we take a break. Back with Miz pounding away but getting stopped cold by a clothesline. The Elevated DDT is countered into a backdrop to the apron and a neck snap across the top rope. Miz is holding his left arm as they head to the floor with Orton being rammed into whatever object Miz can find. Randy comes back by sending Miz into the post and it’s a double countout at about 4:00 with maybe 1:00 shown. Nothing to see here.

Orton pounds away on Miz even more, only to have Miz come back with right hands of his own. Randy sends him into the barricade and gives Miz an Elevated DDT onto the concrete right in front of Miz’s parents. Randy still isn’t done as he grabs a chair and Pillmanizes Miz’s neck (the knee drop clearly hit Miz’s back).

Here are Ryback and Heyman with Paul in a wheelchair being pushed by Axel. Heyman is shaking and talks about the seven deadly sins and how many heathens there are here in Cleveland. There are so many people here who can never come close to doing what Heyman has done, such as pinning CM Punk. He can say it over and over again but every time it will be the truth. No matter how Punk tries to spin it, the record books will say Heyman won their first encounter.

Heyman would love to take credit for having some master plan but he has to stop for a Goldberg chant. Punk gave him a horrendous beating last night and it’s a miracle that he’s not in a nursing home right now. He pulled this off because one man took the initiative to change history. One man decided to stop Punk from destroying Heyman and it’s this big beautiful man right here. Heyman owes Ryback his life and he’ll continue to torment CM Punk for as long as he can. Ryback says he can’t stand a bully like CM Punk and he’s here to stop him. Ryback drops to a knee to put his arm around Heyman, earning a kiss on the cheek.

Tons of Funk vs. Real Americans vs. Usos

This is elimination rules and the winners get a title shot at some point in the future. Brodus knocks Swagger to the floor to start and the Real Americans have a huddle. Back in and Swagger tags in Jimmy Uso to face Brodus with Jimmy hitting whatever fast strikes he can to take over. Brodus casually catches a cross body and slams him down a few times. A backbreaker and elbow drop crush Jimmy but Cesaro tags himself in.

Jimmy takes Antonio down with a jumping elbow to the face and it’s off to Jey with a clothesline for two. A hard European uppercut knocks Jey down but he manages a tag to Tensai a few seconds later. Tensai hits a delayed butterfly suplex on Cesaro while not even looking like he’s straining. Cesaro gets clotheslined to the floor but Jimmy tagged himself in on the way down. Tensai pounds way on Jimmy but misses a splash in the corner. A hard clothesline puts Jimmy down and a bad looking choke bomb looks to get the pin, only to have Cesaro roll Tensai up for the elimination at 4:40.

Cesaro dropkicks Jimmy to the floor and we take a break. Back with Swagger holding both of Jimmy’s arms back. Apparently we missed the long giant swing from Cesaro during the break. Nice job on that WWE. The Vader Bomb crushes Jimmy and Cesaro jumps over Swagger’s shoulder for a double stomp to the chest. We hit the chinlock and the fans start chanting Randy Savage. Jimmy finally dives over for the hot tag to Jey who comes in off the top with a clothesline to Swagger.

Everything breaks down and a kick to the face gets two on Jack. The Usos hit a double plancha to the floor to take out the Real Americans in a cool spot. Back in and Jimmy gets caught in the Patriot Lock but he finally kicks away and superkicks Swagger down. The Superfly Splash is broken up by the running belly to belly but Jey tags himself in and hits the Superfly Splash for the pin and the title shot at 13:15.

Rating: C+. We didn’t need Tons of Funk but the second half of the match was really good stuff. Tag matches are a simple way to fire up the crowd and power vs. speed is the best formula you can use. The ending was great, the dives were great and the match (at least after the break) was really fun. Good stuff here.

Miz has an injured thorax and Dusty is being held overnight for observations.

The WWE loves reading!

Bray Wyatt talks about everyone wanting more and more of everything. There’s another world beyond ours and in his world, you put an animal out of its misery when it can’t find its way around. Bray asks if we want to see something really scary and we get a montage of him hitting Sister Abigail on everyone. He promises Abigail to put everyone down and smiles at the camera.

We look at Dusty being knocked out earlier.

People encourage Daniel Bryan in the back.

Roman Reigns vs. Daniel Bryan

Rollins, Ambrose and Orton are all at ringside. Bryan fires off kicks in the corner to start before ramming Reigns’ head into the other buckle. Reigns ducks the clothesline so Bryan goes back to the leg with a dragon screw leg whip. Bryan goes after the leg but Roman kicks him away. Reigns sends him into the corner but Bryan comes back with even more kicks. Off to a leg lock with Bryan dropping forearms to Roman’s jaw. Roman finally gets up and drives Daniel into the corner and clotheslines him down to take over.

We hit the chinlock on Bryan but he gets back up and hits a knee into Reigns’ knee to take him down. Reigns hits a knee to the chest of his own but Bryan casually leg dives him down again. Now let’s look at the fast count from last night because that story hasn’t been driven into us in awhile. Reigns slams him down for two and now we look at the regular speed count AND the fast count. NOW THEY’RE SIDE BY SIDE!!! Reigns powers Bryan down into a chinlock but Daniel comes back with the missile dropkick to send Roman to the floor, only to have the FLYING GOAT caught in mid air. Bryan is rammed into the post as we take a break.

Back with Reigns placing Bryan on the top rope but Bryan punches his way out of a superplex attempt. The flying headbutt misses though and Reigns gets a two count. Roman talks a lot of trash and catches a charging Bryan in a spinning Rock Bottom for two. Bryan fights out of another chinlock and backflips over Reigns to hit the running clothesline. Here come more kicks but Reigns catches the big one in a Samoan drop. Orton is now standing and looking nervous.

Reigns calls for the powerbob but Bryan counters into a rollup for two. The BIG kick to the head gets two for Bryan and Reigns rolls to the floor. Bryan hits an insanely hard baseball slide dropkick to take out Rollins but he takes too long knocking Ambrose down and gets caught by a big running clothesline from Reigns. Not that it matters as Bryan hooks the YES Lock, drawing in Orton for the DQ at 18:20.

Rating: B-. This was good stuff but it went on a bit too long. Reigns isn’t ready to go nearly twenty minutes on his own yet but he certainly didn’t look bad. That’s a good sign as he’s got more to him than just the power and look, which is rare for a guy that size. Good main event here and a good performance from Reigns. Bryan was his usual self.

Post match Orton gets caught in the YES Lock but Shield makes the save. Orton and SHield beat Bryan down and they load up the chair around Bryan’s neck but the entire midcard plus Dolph Ziggler and RVD come out for the save. Reigns spears Kingston down but Ziggler and RVD knock Ambrose to the floor. A double superkick from the Usos take out Reigns and Bryan hits the running knee to Rollins. Eveyrone puts Bryan on their shoulders for a celebration to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. A lot of stuff happened here and it makes for an interesting set up to Battleground. The title being stripped was pretty clear given how things went last night but I didn’t think it would happen that fast. The ending was what we’ve been waiting on since Summerslam and it worked very well. The Dusty’s Choice segment was awesome stuff but Orton trying to be all aggressive didn’t work all that well. I mean….it’s Miz. Also, an injured thorax? You can’t say chest anymore? It’s a good show with some good wrestling, but as usual there’s too much here to drag it to three hours.

Results

Dolph Ziggler b. Dean Ambrose – Zig Zag

Fandango b. R-Truth – Guillotine legdrop

Brie Bella/Cameron/Naomi b. Aksana/Layla/Alicia Fox – Bella Buster to Aksana

Rob Van Dam b. Damien Sandow – Five Star Frog Splash

Randy Orton vs. The Miz went to a double countout

Usos b. Real Americans and Tons of Funk – Superfly Splash to Swagger

Daniel Bryan b. Roman Reigns via DQ when Randy Orton interfered

 

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On This Day: September 13, 2001 – Smackdown: Two Days After

Smackdown
Date: September 13, 2001
Location: Compaq Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 12,046
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

 

This is the post 9/11 Smackdown, which was the first major gathering to occur after the September 11th attacks. Obviously due to that this is another show where the wrestling means nothing at all which is definitely the best thing they could have done. I saw this when it aired and haven’t seen it since. Let’s get to it.

 

Surprisingly enough we get the WWE opening which today would be the montage thing. This is live for once on a Thursday.

 

Loud USA chant to start and then we actually do the theme song. This is pre-Brand Split and in the Alliance period.

 

The roster is out in the aisle with Rock being out front. There’s a very different dynamic here than there is at other tribute shows.

 

Lillian sings the Star Spangled Banner with the red, white and blue ropes out like the old days. I guess Vince was really patriotic back in the day or something.

 

Don’t expect a lot of jokes here or incredibly serious grading here as this isn’t a regular show/review.

 

Edge talks about how he wasn’t going to do one of these interviews because he didn’t think the fans cared what Edge or Adam Copeland said about this. This is about entertaining the people tonight though as is their job. There’s definitely a pride here and the mood is far more upbeat.

 

Ricky Santana, an agent, says that he’s mad but he isn’t going to hide in fear.

 

Hardy Boys vs. Lance Storm/Hurricane

 

WWF vs. Alliance here. At least we can look at Lita. Hurricane has some weird almost funk music here and is European Champion. Heyman’s intro of Hurricane always cracked me up. “Able to leap tall cruiserweights in a single bound, more powerful than a local luchador, look, up on the stage, it’s a bird, it’s a plane, IT’S THE HURRICANE!” Hilarious. Matt vs. Hurricane to start us off which was the feud at this point.

 

Matt takes him down early and strikes Hurricane’s pose. The Hardys send the evil ones into each other and Matt gets a rollup for two. Fast paced stuff to start and I can’t keep up with it. Double team on Matt and we get a Lita chant. Hurricane is tagged in and puts the cape on. Cross body hits Matt for two. Matt grabs a Russian Leg Sweep and it’s off to Storm and Jeff.

 

Poetry in Motion to Hurricane but the one to Storm misses. Twist of Fate is blocked by a superkick by Hurricane which gets two. Jeff takes Hurricane down on the floor with a rana. Back inside the Twist and the Swanton take care of Storm to end this. Quick match and too short to rate, but fun for an opener.

 

Terri talks about thinking of this from a mother’s perspective and how so many people lost family members in this.

 

Rock says he can’t comprehend what the families are going through with this. He doesn’t seem sure of what to say which is totally understandable.

 

A local businessman says exactly what you would expect him to say.

 

Rob Van Dam vs. Spike Dudley

 

RVD is Hardcore Champion but this is non title. Molly Holly is with Spike and is very cute. After we hear about the Red Cross accepting donations, Spike goes right at RVD. Paul talks about how these two had wars in ECW. I don’t remember those at all but that’s just me. This is hardcore mind you.

 

Van Dam gets his spinning leg drop across the apron for two. RVD brings in a chair but Spike gets a victory roll for two. In an impressive move, RVD misses a moonsault but catches the chair and dropkicks it into the head of Spike. Paul praises him, which makes me wonder why he never put the ECW Title on him. Five Star ends this with ease in very short time so no rating.

 

Jericho says he’d rather be in New York doing whatever he could to help. We don’t know what’s coming in the next five minutes or ten minutes and tonight maybe we should be a bit kinder or more gentle. It was weird hearing Jericho be this serious but he was rather articulate and well thought out.

 

Stasiak says this will make us stronger. Very short and sweet.

 

Lita says she’s numb to this still and she has a lot of emotions because of this. She isn’t sure what to do and wouldn’t say she was. She says everyone should stop and take a deep breath which is what this show is for. Makes sense.

 

Chris Jericho vs. Christian

 

I’m reviewing this match on two shows at the moment. Kind of ironic I guess for no apparent reason. We do get the old CHRISTIAN! AT LAST YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN entrance which is always cool. Oh and he has the stupid glasses here which is always a cool perk. Edge is IC Champion and the feud is kind of going on at this point with the brothers (now not brothers).

 

Christian talks for a bit but is cut off by Jericho. Jericho makes fun of the ring entrance including a falsetto version of theme song with a little parody thrown in. For a bit there I forgot the point of this show, which I think is exactly the idea. Jericho comes straight at him and the fight is on. Attempt at the Walls starts almost 15 seconds in but Christian sends him into the post very quickly.

 

A single arm DDT by Christian gets two. I think Christian is in the Alliance here but I’m not sure. There’s an Alliance referee in there so that should sum things up pretty clearly. Jericho gets a shot in and here he comes (TO SAVE THE DAY! SAVE THE DAY!). Enziguri sets up the bulldog but the Lionsault gets knees. And never mind as Christian yells and gets rolled up for the pin. Another fast match that is too short to grade. Decent while it lasted though.

 

Kanyon says he’s proud of New York and his family who are cops in New York for coming together for this.

 

Taz says he’s scared because his family is in New York. He seemed to get cut off here almost.

 

Torrie says nothing of note.

 

Hurricane says this isn’t about being American but about being human. The people that did this are less than human.

 

Bubba Ray Dudley says that which does not kill us makes us stronger. Even though a lot of people were killed, America is stronger.

 

Here’s Rock, who is WCW Champion. That was always weird for some reason. He talks about how this is a special night and he’s here to have a great time, live on his show. He issues an open challenge.

 

Shawn Stasiak vs. The Rock

 

Stasiak is the son of the former WWF Champion, Stan the Man Stasiak. The problem was that there was a lack of talent between the generations. He has Stacy with him so that helps. Part of Stasiak’s gimmick was that he would charge at people and they would just step aside. Rock does just that and Stasiak goes flying. Rock issues the challenge again and once again goes flying.

 

Third time the challenge goes out and one more time Stasiak comes a-charging! Rock holds up and hand and wants to know what is wrong with this guy. Every week this happens and Stasiak either knocks himself unconscious or gets thrown out of the ring. It’s probably embarrassing and it probably hurts. Instead, let’s talk about pie.

 

Stasiak doesn’t like pie. Any longtime WWF fan immediately gets the joke here. Rock asks if he likes strudel but before he can answer Rock asks Stacy if she likes the People’s Strudel. She seems to be intrigued but Shawn interrupts again and wants a WCW Title shot RIGHT NOW. Wait isn’t this match already going on? Either way, handshake, Rock Bottom, pin. Absolutely hilarious segment with Rock being his usual awesome self.

 

Bill Demott says the firefighters and cops are the real role models, not him or the people in this company.

 

Ivory says there are more good people than bad in the world. America is made up of a bunch of different people and we’ll embrace this tragedy.

 

X-Factor vs. APA

 

X-Factor is X-Pac and Albert. Pac has the Light Heavyweight and Cruiserweight Titles. Pac vs. Farrooq to start us off with the tiny guy getting hammered down very quickly. Pac gets some kicks in and here’s Bradshaw, making the tiny guy run. Off to Albert vs. Bradshaw and down goes Albert to a big boot. JR talks about dipping Bradshaw’s fist in barbecue sauce.

 

Vader Bomb by Albert misses and it’s off to Simmons. BIG bicycle kick takes his head down as JR is planning a road trip with Heyman to Oklahoma. Spinebuster takes Pac down and it’s back to Bradshaw vs. Albert. Fallaway Slam sends X-Pac flying. Albert misses a splash and the Clothesline From JBL (complete with a Hook Em Horns sign) ends this with relative ease.

 

Rating: C-. Pretty weak match but the commentary was hilarious. I have no idea if they were talking in code or if this was just random chatter to fill in time but it cracked me up. JR can be funny when he’s not taking himself far too seriously. The APA was far past their prime here but they could still fight.

 

Angle says he’s not a real hero but rather the people helping in New York.

 

Booker T vs. Big Show

 

Booker is Alliance here and the hometown guy so this is a weird combination. They don’t mention him being from Houston here for semi-obvious reasons. He and Shane have a handicap match vs. Rock at Unforgiven. There was a live even in Lexington for Sunday but it was postponed. I have never heard of that show before and I don’t think I went to the rescheduled one. JR is still talking about barbecue.

 

Show chops away and puts Booker on the floor quickly. All Show to start as Ross and Heyman continue to have a good old time on commentary. Booker gets a superkick but is knocked right back down again. This is Show in the one piece swimsuit that never looked right at all on him. Chokeslam is reversed by knees to the ribs but the sunset flip just doesn’t work at all. Show misses a big boot and a missile dropkick puts Show down for the axe kick for a long two. A second also gets two so a front flip leg drop gets the pin finally. Another short quick match that you really can’t grade as it was so short. This is getting old.

 

Lance Storm says that he isn’t American but he’s a person. Every time he’s not at home he’s going to worry about his family. This is an attack on the world, not America.

 

D-Von says this wakes us up and tells us that this is real. Everything is screwed up right now in other countries so they want to bring us down with them.

 

A retired member of the Navy thanks Vince for doing all this which really was a big deal.

 

Lita vs. Ivory

 

Lita has the pigtails and doesn’t look right in them. She has the flag with her which is cool to see. Ivory is in the Alliance here and looks a lot better in leather than in the RTC stuff. Lita knocks her around with relative ease to start us off. Sunset flip doesn’t work as Ivory grabs the pigtails. We hit the chinlock which lasts for only a second or so. Another chinlock is fought out of and there’s a headscissors to put Ivory down. Twist of Fate and Moonsault gives us another short match that wasn’t very good. Again though, it’s not a typical show.

 

Stacy says she’s 21 so she has no idea what this means for the most part. She sounds like a high school chick here.

 

Austin says he can’t change the world but what he thinks is that whoever did this is a coward. Tonight by going back to work it’s the thing to do. He offers his condolences for those that lost their loved ones and we do have to mourn, but we need to get back to the way things were. That seemed to be the common answer and that makes sense I think.

 

Booker says the people that helped in New York are the real heroes. This is going to make us stronger.

 

And now there’s this part. This is the interview/talk that makes everyone look at the company and the McMahons and say “really?” Stephanie, looking TICKED, talks about how a few years ago people tried to take shots at her family and the company but they only made them stronger. She’s talking about the steroids trial. That’s what’s happening to America today. Yes, Vince McMahon allegedly breaking the law by distributing illegal drugs has just been compared to the September 11th attacks. And people wonder why this is made fun of so much.

 

Dudley Boys/Test vs. William Regal/Tajiri/Scotty 2 Hotty

 

Tajiri has a title of some sort here. At least I think he does. Maybe he doesn’t and it’s just part of his outfit. D-Von vs. Regal to start us off. Scotty is literally jumping up and down and screaming for a tag. Tajiri comes in instead in an unintentionally funny bit. He kicks the tar out of everyone but Test takes care of that.

 

Bubba hammers on him a bit as Tajiri is the face in peril. That back splash that never hits doesn’t hit here and it’s off to Scotty to face Test. The Worm to Bubba is broken up as is What’s Up, the latter by mist to the face. There’s the Worm to Bubba and then thankfully Test kicks the tar out of Scotty for the pin.

 

Rating: D+. Just a six man here to fill in time before the end of the show. Test got a big push around this time but they never pulled the trigger on him. He got a bigger one the previous year which was his real chance at being champion which he probably should have been. Match was more or less just there and a way to get the Worm in.

 

Lillian says she isn’t sure about her family and friends who live in New York.

 

Farrooq is mad about it and says the people that did it are cowards.

 

Regal is from a country where terrorism is more common but he can’t explain how he feels here. We have to get on with our lives though, which seems to be happening.

 

Albert talks about being disgusted by what he saw.

 

Rhyno vs. Kurt Angle

 

Was there really any doubt that the American Hero would close the show? Rhyno grabs a headlock which gets him nowhere at all for the most part. Cross body gets two. Angle hammers away but Rhyno gets a shoulder into the corner to take over. Rhyno busts out a freaking airplane spin for two.

 

Off to the chinlock now which doesn’t last long. Rhyno gets the belly to belly but the Gore misses, as does the Olympic Slam. Double clothesline puts both guys down for a bit. Rolling Germans to Rhyno but Angle takes a spinebuster to put them both back down again. Gore hits but THE POWER OF AMERICA prevails and it’s only two. Angle Slam is the counter to an Irish Whip and since it’s AMERICA against Ireland the AMERICAN HERO wins it.

 

Rating: C. Just a match really. Kurt was banged up from an attack on Monday night so that was the idea of the match here. There was no drama or heat on the match and there wasn’t supposed to be. Decent enough for the main event of a shot that wasn’t about wrestling, so I can’t complain here.

 

Overall Rating: A+. This is a show that is worth seeing if you have the chance to find it. The idea was to get people’s minds off of what happened two days before and I think they did that. There were no stories advanced or anything but there weren’t supposed to be any advanced. This left you feeling positive that things were going to be alright again, which is exactly the idea at the end of the day. Good show.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

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Monday Night Raw – February 25, 2002: Well, That Happened

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 25, 2002
Location: Dunkin Donuts Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Attendance: 10,059
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re getting closer to Wrestlemania and the main events are set. The only change so far has been Stephanie joining Jericho on Smackdown to set up the real main event of HHH vs. Stephanie at Wrestlemania. Other than that there isn’t much to say as the midcard will fill itself in over the next few weeks. Let’s get to it.

I’ve already done the March 4 and March 11 shows. The links can be found at the end of this review.

We open with a recap from the NWO on Smackdown for what they’ve done to Austin and Rock so far. Austin came out in the truck and chased the NWO off, eventually kidnapping Hall and beating the tar out of him. Why this is set to Rey Mysterio’s WCW theme music is beyond me.

Theme song.

Val Venis is at WWE New York.

Here’s the NWO to open the show with Hall pushing a wheelbarrow. Hogan doesn’t care that the fans are upset by his attack on Rock. It felt good to hurt Rock and apparently Rock will be here tonight because being hit in the head with a hammer by a 6’6 300lb man and being crushed by a semi-truck is a one week injury. Hall talks about what Austin did to him on Smackdown, setting up their Wrestlemania match. The wheelbarrow was never mentioned at all.

Recap of the WWF on Fear Factor, won by Matt Hardy.

Tag Titles: Billy and Chuck vs. Hardy Boyz

Billy and Chuck won the belts on Smackdown. Chuck punches Jeff down to start but gets caught in a jawbreaker. Off to Matt for some double teaming in the corner and a double suplex for two. The Twist of Fate is broken up and Billy takes Matt down with a clothesline. Chuck stomps Matt down in the corner and pounds away, only to be caught in a suplex to put both guys down.

A double tag brings in Jeff and Billy as everything breaks down. Both champions take Poetry in Motion but Billy breaks up the Swanton attempt. Billy’s cobra clutch slam gets two on Jeff but Lita comes in with the Litarana to take him down. The Twist/Swanton combination takes Billy down but Chuck superkicks Jeff down for the pin to retain.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have enough time to go anywhere but the tag titles continue to mean nothing at all. They’re just kind of there at this point with no story at all. Billy and Chuck are the flavor of the month which is all we’ll see for the next several years. Nothing to see here.

Jericho and his new business partner Stephanie McMahon arrive. Jericho has a video for a production guy.

Austin has nothing to say.

Arn Anderson says he’ll hold the fort down until Flair gets here. Christian comes in and wants to quit because the fans are laughing at him. Diamond Dallas Page and his creepy smile pop in behind him and tells Christian that he doesn’t want to quit. See, all the negativity is holding Christian back. Page gets Christian to do the smile as well, saying it’s a start. As corny as this is, looking at what Page has accomplished with Jake Roberts and Scott Hall, I’d listen to what Page told me to do.

Austin does the WHAT bit and accepts the match with Hall.

We look at Angle putting Kane through a table and destroying his ankle with a chair from Smackdown.

Lance Storm vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Big Show

Intercontinental Champion William Regal is on commentary as the winner of this gets a title shot. The champion wants Lance to win here. Storm kicks Rob down to start and tries to dive on Big Show, only to be tossed back into the ring. Show slams both guys down for two but Rob gets in some kicks and Rolling Thunder for two on Storm. Big Show throws everyone around again so the normal sized guys try to double team him. A double suplex puts both guys down so Storm brings in a chair. Rob hits a top rope kick to drive it into Show’s face and the Five Star sends him to Wrestlemania in less than three minutes.

Booker T is learning Japanese for a shampoo commercial in one of the most infamous storylines of the era.

The APA gets an invitation to the Friendly Tap. The bar owned by referee Tim White.

Rikishi vs. Booker T

Booker pounds Rikishi down into the corner but walks into a powerslam for two. A spin kick puts Rikishi down again and Booker stomps away some more. Rikishi comes back with a bad looking Samoan drop but misses a charge into the corner. A Japanese spin kick misses and Rikishi superkicks him into the corner. Booker uses the referee as a shield and kicks Rikishi down for the pin. This was nothing.

Mark Henry won the Arnold Schwarzenegger strongman challenge over the weekend.

Here are Jericho and Stephanie to show us what’s on the tape. Jericho brags about how awesome he is in the ring and how awesome he is now that he has Stephanie’s genius to help him. The tape is a clip of Jericho injuring HHH’s quad last year and putting him out for eight months. Jericho claims that the injury ruined HHH’s marriage, but Stephanie says it was because HHH is very, ahem, small.

This brings out HHH with Stephanie making small jokes all the way to the ring. HHH implies Stephanie is very wide down there with the fans not seeming to get the joke. HHH remembers Jericho is champion and asks for a match tonight even if the titles aren’t on the line. This brings out Angle who apparently has Vince’s authority to give himself a title shot tonight. Angle leaves so HHH beats up Jericho.

Mr. Perfect thinks people are tired of hearing about Austin, which is why they’re fighting tonight.

Women’s Title: Jazz vs. Mighty Molly

Jazz is defending of course and jumps Molly on the floor to start. She even rips up Molly’s cape to really show how EVIL she is. Molly comes back with some Japanese armdrags, only to be caught in a world’s strongest slam for two. A splash gets another two so Jazz drapes Molly over the top rope for two more. Jazz hits a butterfly suplex and the double chicken wing, only to be rolled up for three straight near falls. Molly misses a high cross body and gets caught in the fisherman’s DDT for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not much to see here but it wasn’t bad or anything. At the end of the day though, no one cares about either of these girls and the crowd reaction proved it. Trish and Lita were the only girls that people cared about for a long time and as cruel as this sounds, it’s because they’re better looking than Jazz. Molly was cute but she had the personality of a door.

Post match Jazz lays out Molly. Back from a break and Arn Anderson is checking on Molly when Undertaker comes out for the beating to set up Flair vs. Taker at Wrestlemania.

WWF World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Chris Jericho

Angle punches Jericho while he still has the belts on his shoulders. A hard clothesline gets two for Kurt and a German suplex gets the same. There’s the overhead belly to belly for two more as this is all Angle so far. Angle charges again but gets backdropped out to the floor. Jericho rips some of the padding off the barricade to drop Angle across the exposed steel.

Back inside and a reverse elbow off the top gets two followed by some elbow drops for the same. Jericho chops him down but Angle counters a Walls attempt into a small package for two. A hot shot puts Angle down but he runs the corner to suplex Jericho down for another near fall. JR points out the obvious flaw in the match: the fans don’t like either guy so there’s no one to cheer for.

Rolling Germans take the champion over but Jericho escapes the ankle lock into a Walls attempt but Angle rolls through that into the ankle lock. Jericho grabs a rope and puts on the Walls but Kurt makes the rope. Chris throws in a title belt and the ring bell before poking the referee in the eye. Somehow that’s not a DQ so Angle hits Jericho with a belt for two. The ankle lock is broken by a rope grab after only a few seconds and an enziguri sends Kurt to the floor. Cue Kane to throw Angle back into the ring so the Breakdown can end Angle.

Rating: C+. This was good for the most part as you would expect from these two but the ending was WAY overbooked for what they were going for. JR was absolutely right with the whole “fans don’t know who to cheer for” thing, which really dragged the match down. Still though, given how lame the wrestling has been in previous weeks, this was solid stuff.

Kane swings a chair at Angle but Kurt ducks and bails through the crowd.

During the break Flair arrived, over an hour and a half into the show. He heard about Arn and immediately left. Ok then.

Hogan goes into Rock’s locker room.

Back from a break and Hogan is talking to the Rock….who is made of cardboard. Hogan talks a lot of trash and says nothing of note at all. He punches the cardboard down after talking about how big of a legend he is.

The APA goes to the Friendly Tap and get jumped by Billy and Chuck. All of the other patrons were gay men/men in drag as part of some joke that wasn’t funny.

The NWO wishes Perfect good luck tonight.

Mr. Perfect vs. Steve Austin

Austin shoves him into the corner to start and we actually get a clean break. Perfect takes him into the opposite corner and gets flipped off for his efforts. A shoulder block puts Austin down and a headlock sends us to a stalemate. They chop it out in the corner and Austin whips him around the ring a few times, getting two off a clothesline. An elbow to the jaw puts Steve down but Austin shrugs it off, does his stomping and hits the Stunner for the clean pin.

Rating: D. This was there to set up whatever post match stuff we’ve got going on. Perfect was a good guy to bring back in but there was clearly nothing for him to do this time around. Nothing to see here as the crowd didn’t care as most of them probably don’t remember Perfect in the first place.

Post match Hall brings the wheelbarrow full of cinder blocks to the ring. The NWO comes out for the beatdown and one of the blocks is broken over Austin’s right knee. This would explain why Austin spent the next few weeks with his left knee heavily taped.

Overall Rating: D. Well that happened. That was my response to almost everything that happened on tonight’s show: that just happened and it didn’t make me want to see anything at Wrestlemania at all. Austin vs. Hall doesn’t do anything for me, Rock vs. Hogan exists but there’s no Rock to build the match and I don’t know of anyone who wants to see Stephanie vs. HHH. Nothing to see here as Wrestlemania 18 continues to look incredibly lame.

Here’s the March 4 Raw if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/01/09/monday-night-raw-march-4-2002-its-two-weeks-before-mania-right/

Here’s the March 11 Raw if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/09/23/monday-night-raw-march-11-2002-for-the-only-time-in-history-steve-austin-vs-hulk-hogan/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:




Monday Night Raw – September 2, 2013: The Heavy Hands Of The McMahons

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 2, 2013
Location: Wells Fargo Arena, Des Moines, Iowa
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

We’re closing in on Night of Champions with the main story still being Bryan vs. the Corporation. The interesting turn of events on Smackdown was Big Show getting very close to helping Bryan without actually doing so, by standing over Bryan to prevent Shield from attacking him. It only lasted for a few moments though as HHH made him leave to humiliate Show again, but the fuse is about to run out. Let’s get to it.

We open with Shield in their now usual spot between the ring and the stage and HHH in the ring. The Game introduces Orton for his opening address. Orton talks about how it’s his job to protect this company and he won’t let its image be tarnished. If you disrespect Orton, you’re disrespecting the WWE. The fans disagree with this theory and let the champion know about it. Last week Daniel Bryan defaced Orton’s new car so on Smackdown, Orton defaced Bryan by spray painting him.

Orton plays the audience’s favorite game by asking questions and then answering them himself. Does Bryan deserve a title shot? NO. Would Bryan have a chance against Randy Orton? NO. Will Bryan ever be an A-list player? NO. Should Bryan give up his title shot at Night of Champions? YES! HHH says that it’s his job to give the fans what they want every week. Over the last few weeks, HHH has been starting to worry about the health and well being of Daniel Bryan.

That’s a problem and the fans are making it even worse with their YES chants. Those chants are making Daniel Bryan confuse popularity with what is best for business. A few years ago there was a superstar named Doink the Clown. Doink was wildly popular but the idea of Doink being WWE Champion would have been bad for business. Daniel Bryan will never be WWE Champion, but maybe HHH can bring back the Cruiserweight or European Titles as realistic goals for Bryan.

Cue Bryan to the arena to say that HHH and Orton have made some great points. Bryan is thrilled to be compared to Doink the Clown but he doesn’t think Doink ever got chants like the ones he’s getting. The only clowns are standing in the ring right now because they think he’s actually giving up his title shot. HHH already gave up his manhood when he cut his hair and became a sellout and Orton gave up being in the WWE Title picture until someone gave him the title on a silver platter.

Bryan says he won’t give up his title shot and Orton wants to know why Bryan would be willing to take so many beatings. Bryan talks about how he’s used to being told he can’t do things but he’s proven everything wrong. That’s something Orton can never understand because he was handed everything. Daniel doesn’t think he can beat Orton for the WWE Championship because he knows he can.

Orton and HHH know it too because they keep putting him in handicap matches and gauntlet matches instead of letting them go one on one. Orton may have the genetics of a champion but he doesn’t have the heart of a champion. HHH wants to know why Bryan is so angry all the time. The anger should be directed at Big Show for never helping him when he has an iron clad contract. Therefore tonight it’s Big Show vs. Daniel Bryan.

HHH and Orton are in the back and seem very pleased with their decisions tonight. They run into Cody Rhodes who thinks the main event tonight will be great as long as no one gets involved. HHH wants to know why people would get involved. Cody asks Orton why he doesn’t want to face Daniel Bryan because that would be best for business. HHH doesn’t like Cody’s input and gives him a match with Randy Orton as a wedding present. If Cody loses he’s out of a job.

Fandango vs. The Miz

A hiptoss puts Fandango down but he rolls to the floor to escape the Figure Four. Miz sends Fandango into the barricade and does a quick dance with Summer before heading back inside. Fandango gets in a few shots to take over but a kick to the chest gets two for Miz. We hit the chinlock and take a break. Back with Fandango in control despite apparently having a broken nose.

Fandango goes to the middle rope but gets taken down by a dragon screw legwhip. The Figure Four is countered again and Miz misses the corner clothesline. A slingshot legdrop puts Miz down but it hurts Fandango’s leg again. Not that it matters as Miz puts on the Figure Four from the mat for the submission at 8:15.

Rating: D. The match was pretty bad but it’s understandable if Fandango got hurt halfway through it. I can even forgive the lack of a Skull Crushing Finale as you don’t want Fandango’s injured face going straight into the mat. Not much to see here but it’s a bit more understandable given the circumstances.

Booker T gives Daniel Bryan a pep talk but thinks maybe Bryan should give up his title match. Bryan: “Tell me you didn’t just say that.” It’s about Bryan’s life, not the title. Booker warns that HHH and company could ruin his life.

We recap Heyman/Axel vs. Punk from last week.

Dolph Ziggler vs. ???

Ziggler is here for a match but Dean Ambrose jumps him from behind and sends Ziggler into the post. Ambrose says Dolph needs to show more respect. Here’s Dolph’s opponent.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Ryback

Ziggler says he can go but walks right into an overhead belly to belly. Ryback pounds away at the back of his head and tosses Ziggler around by the hair. Dolph is stomped down as the idiot fans tell Ryback that he can’t wrestle. The Meat Hook is blocked by a dropkick followed by a Stinger Splash and right hands in the corner. Not that they matter though as the Meat Hook takes Dolph down and Shell Shock is good for the pin at 3:06.

Rating: D+. Again no time to go anywhere here but it sets up Ziggler vs. Ambrose at the PPV for the US Title. Ryback can be fine as a guy who just beats up various people until he has an actual feud with someone standing up to him. Also it’s a good idea to have Ziggler beaten down in advance to build sympathy for him.

Brad Maddox tells Stephanie and HHH that Big Show isn’t willing to fight Bryan tonight. Stephanie will deal with this in public.

Here’s Stephanie to deal with Big Show. She talks about how Big Show helped her grow up

backstage as a kid and how much she respects him. Big Show comes out and is told sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to. She reminds him that he’s broke due to handing out too much money and some bad investments.

The iron clad contract doesn’t work if he doesn’t perform and his career can’t go on much longer due to getting older. How many other jobs are there for people his size? Stephanie says that the reality for Big Show is he won’t live that long because of his size, so he needs to take care of his family while he can. I have no idea what to say to that. Stephanie hugs him and Big Show is about to cry.

Edge will be back next week for one night only. Cool.

Big Show broke a lot of stuff during the break.

Here’s how to download the WWE App because the WWE thinks you’re stupid.

3MB vs. Prime Time Players

It’s Slater and Mahal for 3MB tonight. Slater starts with Titus and is quickly launched into the corner. Titus stomps him down and blows the whistle at the same time (Cole: “Whistle while you work!”) before it’s off to Young. Mahal comes in and gets caught in an atomic drop for two. The announcers of course ignore the match to talk about Big Show and his contract.

Young gets taken down and triple teamed by the Band with Slater getting two off a neckbreaker. Mahal comes in to drop a bunch of knees to the chest but Slater charges into an overhead belly to belly suplex. The hot tag brings in Titus who gets two off a big boot to Mahal. Everything breaks down and the Clash of the Titus gets the pin on Mahal at 5:28.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here again but it’s better than the Real Americans losing over and over again. The Players are probably going to get a title shot assuming the Shield keeps the belts that much longer. They’re not bad in the ring or anything and the fans are into the dance so no complaints for the most part.

Brad Maddox is on the phone when Heyman comes in and says get off. Heyman isn’t pleased with the idea of having to face Punk at Night of Champions because he’ll disappear if Punk gets his hands on him. He wants an explanation but here’s HHH to say he approved that match. Heyman’s tone changes as he asks why HHH made the match. HHH talks about how it’s what the fans want and maybe Heyman can weasel his way out of it.

Bray Wyatt talks about the story of Icarus flying too close to the sun and melting his wax wings. Kane tried to get too close to the Wyatt Family and it was like a lamb being led to the slaughter. Kane made his bed and now he’s burning in it.

Cody Rhodes vs. Randy Orton

If Cody loses he’s gone. Orton pounds away in the corner to start and takes him down with a clothesline. Rhodes is draped over the top rope and sent out to the floor, but he sends Randy into the steps for a breather. Cody cranks on the arm and gets two off a dropkick before pounding away in the corner. Orton gets choked on the ropes but comes back with a poke to the eye for two. More right hands have Randy in control but Cody comes back with a release front suplex and right hands of his own in the corner. Orton hits the backbreaker out of said corner to send Cody to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Orton throwing Cody back inside for two but Cody comes back with an elbow to the jaw and an uppercut to put Rhodes down. A springboard missile dropkick gets a close two and the Disaster Kick gets the same. Orton sidesteps the moonsault press and puts Cody down with the Elevated DDT. The RKO is countered into the Cross Rhodes out of nowhere for a VERY close two. I thought that was it. The fans are WAY into Cody here but Orton snaps his throat across the top rope. Back in and Rhodes gets two off a rollup but another Disaster Kick misses and the RKO connects for the pin at 13:35.

Rating: B. When you have me believing that Cody Rhodes could beat Randy Orton, you’re doing something right. I’m not sure where they’re going to go with Cody now as he got a good rub here but apparently he’s gone for a bit due to the loss. Either they’re going back on what they said or he’s really taking time off for some reason. Still though, good match here.

HHH comes out to praise Cody but fires him anyway. The fans chant for Cody as he limps to the back.

Here’s CM Punk with a kendo stick and something to say. He says “I promise” which are words that don’t mean much to a lot of people around here. Punk says he’s tired of empty threats and that he’s having trouble of trying to come up with what to say next. Right now he doesn’t want to wrestle because he wants to fight. He wants to fight Paul Heyman and if he has to go through Curtis Axel to do so then that’s fine with him.

After what happened last week, even he doesn’t want to fight himself right now. Punk guarantees that in 13 days, he’s going to get what he wants. Heyman has been talking about Punk breaking his heart, but at Night of Champions Punk is going to break Heyman’s face. He promises.

We look at Heyman attacking Punk last week.

Big Show comes in to apologize to Bryan for the match tonight but Bryan understands and says he’ll win.

We recap AJ’s promo from last week on the Total Divas. It’s going to be interesting to see who is supposed to be cheered in this story.

Natalya vs. Naomi vs. Brie Bella

The winner gets AJ at Night of Champions. AJ comes out for commentary and Natalya gets a quick rollup for two on Naomi. Brie hits her X-Factor for two on Naomi as well as AJ talks about how worthless the Total Divas are. Naomi tries a sunset flip on Brie but Natalya sends the Bella to the floor. The Sharpshooter is countered into a small package for two but Natalya catches Brie coming off the top with a cross body. Naomi hits the Rear View on Natalya but AJ comes in for the DQ at 1:48. Fourway for the title I guess.

The Total Divas beat AJ down and leave her laying.

Los Matadores are still coming.

Damien Sandow vs. Rob Van Dam

Since RVD hasn’t beaten Sandow enough times already. Sandow pounds away in the corner and hooks a quick chinlock. More stomping ensues until Van Dam comes back with some kicks to the face. Cue Del Rio for a distraction, allowing Damien to knock Rob to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Rob fighting out of a chinlock, only to be put right back in the same hold. Rob fights up again but gets caught in an Edge-O-Matic for two. The Russian legsweep and Wind-Up Elbow get the same and it’s off to a double chicken wing. Rob fights up again and kicks Sandow down before getting two off Rolling Thunder. Damien gets snapped across the top rope and the Five Star gets the pin at 10:06. Del Rio never did anything.

Rating: D+. I’m tempted to just skip Sandow’s matches from now on. I haven’t thought he could win a singles match in weeks and there was no reason to assume he was going to do so here either. I believe his last singles win was in June, but we’re supposed to buy him as a world title contender. Hopefully he loses the case or something soon.

Stephanie makes the obvious fatal fourway for the title shot at the PPV.

We recap tonight’s show.

Cody is escorted from the building by security and admits that Orton was the better man. He rants about how much the McMahons have hated the Rhodes over the years and walks away.

The roster comes out to watch the main event again.

Daniel Bryan vs. Big Show

Big Show doesn’t want to do this so Bryan goes after him, only to be shoved down. Bryan comes right back at him again with Big Show shouting don’t make him do this. Show throws him to the floor with Big Show saying calm down. Bryan comes back in again and takes Show down with some kicks, only to have Big Show LAUNCH him off in a kickout. The running dropkick in the corner has Big Show staggered but Bryan charges into a superkick. There are the chops to Bryan’s chest and a hard slam for good measure.

Show tells Daniel to stop fighting but Bryan keeps coming at him. Bryan dropkicks the knee out and fires off the kicks. A short DDT gets two but Big Show powers out again. Bryan goes up but dives into a shoulder to the ribs. Show loads up the WMD but starts to walk away. This draws out HHH and the Shield with the Game saying get back in the ring right now. Show keeps going as Shield gets in and beats Bryan down for the DQ at 5:56.

Rating: C-. This was fine but as usual there’s only so much you can do with Bryan against a guy this size. The match wasn’t all that bad and Bryan did what he could, but this was all about the story instead of the match. There’s nothing wrong with that, but on a night with some pretty lame wrestling we needed more than this.

Post match Big Show is about to cry again when HHH says knock Bryan out. Show loads up the punch but rolls to the floor instead. Stephanie meets him in the aisle and says think about his family which sends Big Show back inside. HHH tells him to knock Bryan out again and after showing off his Knucklehead level acting chops, Big Show knocks Bryan out. This would be the sixth consecutive show ending with Daniel Bryan laid out since he won the WWE Championship. Show leaves but here’s Orton to stand over Bryan to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was exhausting. For one thing it was the return of the WWE App as the announcers spent a long time explaining how great it was and how much we needed to download it. The match quality was pretty horrible other than the Orton match and the main event but that’s to be expected anymore. This is another example of how the show would be on fire if these were two hour shows but at three hours, the show is just extra warm.

Results

The Miz b. Fandango – Figure Four

Ryback b. Dolph Ziggler – Shell Shock

Prime Time Players b. 3MB – Clash of the Titus to Mahal

Randy Orton b. Cody Rhodes – RKO

Natalya vs. Brie Bella vs. Naomi went to a no contest when AJ Lee interfered

Rob Van Dam b. Damien Sandow – Five Star Frog Splash

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:




Monday Night Raw – February 11, 2002: Time For A Wedding!

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 11, 2002
Location: Jonesboro Convocation Center, Jonesboro, Arkansas
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is going to be one of those one idea shows, as tonight is all about Stephanie and HHH renewing their wedding vows. These would be the vows originally made by HHH, speaking in a falsetto voice since Stephanie was unconscious in the front seat of his car. Other than that, it’s the go home show for No Way Out, but we need to focus on HHH and Stephanie instead of waiting for next week, after the PPV. Let’s get to it.

We open with a package hyping up the wedding vows tonight.

Theme song.

Here’s Undertaker with something to say to open us up. Taker respects the face pop he gets but calls the fans a bunch of hillbillies. He rants about not being respected by Rock on Thursday and we get a clip of Rock laying Undertaker out, giving Maven the pin and the Hardcore Title. Taker responded by tombstoning Rock onto a limo. He threatens to beat Rock until Rock respects him. That’s not quite as good as “the beatings will continue until morale improves.” This brings out Flair to talk about respect a lot and make Undertaker vs. Austin for later tonight.

Chris Jericho vs. Edge

Non-title of course. Edge jumps Jericho during his entrance and beats him around ringside until we get a bell. Back in and Jericho pounds away at the head instead of Edge’s heavily taped ribs. First the arm last week and now the ribs? Come on Jericho. A clothesline gets two for Edge but Jericho comes back with an elbow to the face and another to the ribs, restoring my faith in the Ayatollah.

Jericho stays on the ribs but misses a charge into the post, giving Edge an opening. A catapult into the corner gets two for Edge but Jericho comes right back with a bulldog, only to miss the Lionsault. Edge misses the spear but counters the Walls attempt into a rollup for two. Jericho drapes him over the top rope but goes to get a title, allowing Edge to spear him down for two. Not that it matters as Jericho hits him him in the ribs with the belt and the Breakdown (Skull Crushing Finale) is good for the pin.

Rating: C-. Edge wasn’t at the main event level yet but his time was coming. This kind of basic psychology is all a match needs most of the time and it’s annoying when it’s just not there. This is the kind of stuff we could use more of today: world champions or main event level talent beating midcarders instead of other main eventers. You can save the main event matches for actual, you know, MAIN EVENTS.

Vince says he’s here in Arkansas because he’s fond of hogs. He’s here for the last show before the NWO arrives and takes over. He won’t answer if he’s going to walk Stephanie down the aisle.

We get another clip of the NWO. I guess this is a theme tonight. Remember that this is a mere THREE MONTHS after the Invasion ended. Again, that thing could have gone on for years by bringing in big names every now and then to give the Alliance a boost.

HHH and Stephanie run into each other in the back with Stephanie begging him to not go after Kurt. The baby is fine after Stephanie was run over (by a person) on Smackdown. HHH says he won’t go after Kurt but he has to take care of something first.

Goldust vs. Rikishi

Goldust tries to jump Rikishi but gets punched away. It turns into a slugout with Goldust punching him down, only to get caught in a Samoan drop. The Banzai Drop is countered with two legs to the groin, but RVD comes in for the DQ a few seconds later. Seriously, Goldust vs. Van Dam? That’s kind of a waste.

HHH runs into Arn Anderson and Arn just happens to have a FedEx package for him. It sounds like a video tape when HHH shakes it.

Austin says he was scared when he got here because it’s a dry county (meaning alcohol can’t be sold). This is at the height of the WHAT bit so Austin lists off all of the health problems he had because of the lack of alcohol before listing off all of them alcohol he and Debra bought in another county before coming here. He and the Arkansas hillbillies are going to disrespect Undertaker all night long. He’ll take the Undisputed Title on Sunday too. Somehow this takes about five minutes to get through.

The wedding singers practice for later.

Godfather vs. Kurt Angle

This is during the failed Godfather Goes Legit period where he owned an escort service instead of being a pimp. Angle pounds him down but gets caught by a knee/boot to the chest/shoulder area. Kurt is like screw that and drills him in the leg before ending this in less than a minute with the ankle lock.

Post match Angle puts the hold on again before making a vow of his own: he’ll make HHH tap on Sunday.

HHH gives Stephanie a new ring. Much crying ensues.

Steve Austin vs. Undertaker

Jericho jumps Austin during the entrance and Undertaker takes advantage with some Deadman choking. They head inside for the opening bell and Austin comes back with some right hands and the Thesz Press for more right hands. They run the ropes a bit before Undertaker takes Austin down with the jumping clothesline. Back to the floor and Taker is whipped knees first into the steps, only to come back with a clothesline to send Austin onto the concrete. That goes nowhere so we head back inside with Taker getting a near fall. Austin escapes the tombstone and hits the Stunner but here’s Jericho for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Remember when these guys main evented the biggest Summerslam ever a few years ago? Apparently WWE doesn’t either as we’ve got them in a five minute throwaway match to close out the first hour of Raw. Nothing to see here as these two are clearly in need of ANYTHING new.

Post match Jericho hits Austin with a belt and a cooler.

Jericho bailed during the break.

Tazz vs. Booker T.

Tag champion vs. challenger for Sunday. Simple idea for a simple PPV match. Booker pounds Tazz down into the corner but Tazz comes back with some clothesline. A side kick puts Tazz right back down and there’s the Spinarooni to annoy JR. Tazz comes back with the Tazmission, only to have Spike and Test come in for a distraction so Booker can kick him low. The referee gets rid of Spike so Test can kick Tazz’s head off, giving Booker the pin. Nothing to see here at all.

The Dudleyz are at WWF New York. Bubba is in his old trance for some reason before demanding a title match at the PPV. Not that they would get one but at least they’re acting like the titles mean something.

Stacy Keibler vs. Torrie Wilson

They’re in bikinis so this isn’t going to last long. This is as a result of Torrie having her hand raised after she and Stacy won a posedown against Billy and Chuck. It’s exactly what you would expect: Jerry makes erection jokes, the girls do stuff that puts them in various, ahem, positions, the referee is rolled over, Stacy wins with a bad looking rollup. This was what it was.

Stephanie leaves to get dressed but laments that her dad isn’t walking her down the aisle. HHH looks at the package he was given earlier.

Mr. Perfect cheats to beat a national chess champion. These bits never get old.

Rob Van Dam vs. Christian

Christian, currently in a slump, runs in behind RVD to get an early advantage. Rob misses a charge into the post and gets draped over the top rope. Christian knocks him onto the floor and stomps away a lot before ripping at Van Dam’s face in the ring. Rob gets back up and hits a moonsault press out of the corner for two, only to have Christian pound him right back to the mat. A powerslam gets two for Christian and it’s off to a chinlock. Make that three different chinlocks, none of which have the fans responding at all.

Back up and Rob hits a spin kick to put Christian down, followed by a monkey flip out of the corner. A Regal Roll into a middle rope moonsault (barely connected at all) gets two for Rob but Rolling Thunder hits knees. The reverse DDT gets two for Christian and it’s time for him to throw a tantrum. He writhes around on the mat, allowing Rob to come in off the top with the Five Star for the pin in a funny ending.

Rating: C-. The ending was good but there wasn’t much leading up to it. Christian was nowhere near being a big deal on his own yet as he would have to wait years before he became anything of note. Van Dam would be the same kind of guy for almost his entire WWE run, which isn’t bad when you think about it.

Goldust pops up on screen to challenge RVD for No Way Out.

Arn Anderson tells HHH to call Linda.

HHH calls Linda (naturally we can hear everything she says) who tells him that she sent him the FedEx package. It is indeed a video tape which someone sent to her and she immediately sent it to HHH. HHH plays the tape and it’s a doctor that told HHH and Stephanie that their baby was fine as an actor in a commercial. Dun dun DUNN! Stephanie isn’t pregnant, which would have been a bigger revelation had this story not started last week.

Stephanie keeps up the lie to the wedding singers. Vince pops up behind her in a tux and cuts a promo on her before agreeing to walk her down the aisle. Howard Finkel pops in to try to tell Vince what HHH found out but Vince tells him to leave.

Time for the vows and Vince is already annoyed at the WHAT chants. Now we get a wedding song because this segment isn’t already going to go on forever. We know where it’s going because we already saw the payoff. Why not have HHH reveal it during the ceremony to actually surprise the crowd? I’m running out of things to talk about to pass the time during this WAY too long song. Seriously they sing for FOUR MINUTES.

It’s finally time for the vows. Stephanie does a traditional series of them and now it’s time for HHH to end the whole thing. It’s exactly what you would expect: he loves her, she’s the mother of his child, she’s a no good lying witch. HHH erupts on her for only thinking of herself and trying to manipulate him into doing whatever she wants. The marriage is over and there’s a Pedigree for Vince and Stephanie’s EVIL face to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Here’s the major problem at the end of the day: how does this wedding, which DOMINATED the show, make me want to buy No Way Out at all? The NWO, the world title match, and Undertaker vs. Rock (not even on the show tonight) all came off as afterthoughts compared to an angle that started and ended in a single week. There was zero reason this couldn’t have happened next week instead as we set up HHH vs. Stephanie at Wrestlemania.

Here’s No Way Out if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/18/no-way-out-2002-if-an-invasion-happens-and-no-one-cares-does-it-matter/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:




On This Day: August 20, 2001 – Monday Night Raw: Raven Does Bette Midler

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 13, 2001
Location: ARCO Arena, Sacramento, California
Attendance: 9,182
Commentators: Paul Heyman, Jim Ross

We’re past Summerslam now and the Alliance war continues. Rock got the WCW Title last night and Austin cheated to keep the WWF Title. Other than that not a lot happened last night. Still though, they had a well hyped show last night and the show worked very well. It was probably the high point of the Alliance Era PPVs. Tonight we start on the road to Unforgiven. Let’s get to it.

Austin is greeted by a big celebration from the Alliance. This is Steve Austin Appreciation Night. He says he’ll lead by example and has more of last night for him if need be.

Stacy Keibler/Torrie Wilson/Ivory vs. Jacqueline/Molly Holly/Lita

The Alliance beat up Lita last night so there’s your story. Ivory and Molly start with a nice little gymnastics routine. Off to Jackie vs. Torrie and guess who wins that one. Jackie takes down both blondes and here’s Lita to a big reaction. She beats on Ivory for a bit and then brings Jackie back in. A tornado DDT gets a quick pin on Ivory. It’s as out of nowhere as it sounds.

Rating: D. What exactly are you looking for here? The match was nothing and a few of the girls looked good. In short, it was a Divas match and no one cared. These feuds went nowhere until Trish FINALLY started getting better and feuded with Lita to make anyone care in the slightest about the Divas.

The Dudleys are in the back with Test when Stephanie comes in. She says they’ve had issues in the past but now they’re both more mature. Last night she didn’t get what she wants so tonight she wants Test to take Jericho out for good. Test calls Stephanie a bad name and says he’ll do it.

Here’s Rock, the new WCW Champion. Booker had talked about taking Rock to school but last night, Booker got taken to People’s Elbow 101, Advanced Rock Bottoms and Getting Whipped All Over The Building 407. Rock requests the appearance of Booker and it’s midget time. He ends every sentence with sucka and is convinced to do a Spinarooni. Now it’s a Moonwalk, the Running Man and the Deion Sanders dance.

Rock wants to know if Booker wants to keep dancing until Lance Storm comes out. Hijinks will end tonight and there’s a WCW Title match with Storm challenging later. Rock doesn’t know who Storm is. Storm superkicks the midget which isn’t quite as good as Shawn superkicking the girl a few years back. Somehow this took over twelve minutes.

We recap the APA chasing Shane off during the WCW Title match last night, resulting in Bradshaw taking Shane down with the Clothesline.

APA/Scotty 2 Hotty/Big Show/Spike Dudley/Billy Gunn vs. Dudley Boys/Chuck Palumbo/Sean O’Haire/Hugh Morrus/Tommy Dreamer

There are twelve in this if you don’t feel like counting. Farrooq vs. Palumbo to start things off. Quickly off to Sean and Scotty. I wouldn’t expect any long segments in this match. Morrus and Dreamer try to double team Hotty but get taken down by a double clothesline. Here’s Gunn who gets caught in What’s Up but the APA saves. Bradshaw pounds on Tommy and Spike adds a double stomp off the top.

Dreamer catches Spike in a half crab but it’s off to Bubba for some power. A HUGH double flapjack gets two for D-Von. Morrus comes in and walks into a Dudley Dog. Show comes in and everything breaks down. It’s finishers all around for the next minute or so, ending with Show killing Dreamer with the chokeslam for the win.

Rating: C-. This was a big mess but the parade of finishers is always fun to see. It makes no sense as why wouldn’t they use those all the time, but it’s always cool to see. This was really the only way to get most of the people on the roster onto the shows, especially before the Brand Split, which really was a good thing.

Hurricane gives his testimonial about why he loves Steve Austin, which turns into why Green Lantern is awesome. Austin is his new favorite though.

Chris Jericho vs. Test

Jericho is all banged up from the Rhyno match last night. He says nothing of note pre match. Jericho hits a quick forearm to start but walks into a full nelson slam for no cover. Test hammers away but a powerbomb is countered and Jericho takes him down with a spinwheel kick. A neckbreaker sets up the bulldog but Stephanie breaks up the Lionsault. The big boot misses and Jericho knocks him to the floor. Chris goes after Stephanie but here’s Rhyno. Jericho sends him into the steps but walks into the big boot for the pin. Short match and not much to it.

Last night Christian accidentally speared Edge but Edge won the IC Title anyway. Christian comes up to Edge and talks about how they won the King of the Ring and the IC Title last night. Edge raises his glasses at this but lets Christian take the trophy for his match tonight.

Austin inspires Stasiak so much that Stasiak can’t say it right so we get well over 40 takes of it.

Mick Foley is at WWF New York and is inspired by Angle almost winning but getting screwed last night.

WCW Title: Lance Storm vs. The Rock

Storm jumps the champ to start and Rock is in some trouble. Rock comes back with a clothesline and punches away. Storm hits that perfect superkick of his to knock Rock to the floor. Back in Rock charges into an elbow and Storm gets two off a clothesline. Storm punches him down but walks into a spinebuster to put both guys down. The champ gets two off a DDT. Rock Bottom ends this clean.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t bad I guess but what was the point? Rock was never in any real jeopardy (as expected) but there wasn’t even a hurdle for him to get over. This went nowhere though and seemed kind of stupid to do to a guy that lost the IC Title last night. Couldn’t they swap in like Hugh Morrus or someone like that here?

Little Booker comes in for a People’s Elbow and two Spinaroonis.

We recap last Thursday where Saturn beat Moppy and then had Moppy stolen. He put her face on a milk carton. I think Raven wound up doing it.

European Title: Christian vs. Matt Hardy

Christian makes fun of the Sacramento Kings before the match because he’s turning heel soon. Lita still has a bad leg. Christian jumps the champ to start which doesn’t work that well. Matt is sent to the floor but is back in quickly for more punching. Matt hits a clothesline and escapes the Unprettier. Twist is countered and Christian gets a rollup with his feet on the ropes for two. Reverse DDT gets two. Unprettier is countered into the Twist for Matt to retain. This was nothing again.

Package of stills from Austin vs. Angle last night.

Booker arrives over an hour into the show and gets laughed at.

Page thinks Sara wants to sleep with him. He’s not worried about Undertaker.

Taz says Austin has toughened him up.

Booker demands a rematch with Rock tonight. Since Shane owns WCW, couldn’t he make the title match anytime he wanted to? Regal makes midget jokes and explains the midget to Booker. Tajiri laughs so tonight it’s Booker vs. Tajiri.

Booker T vs. Tajiri

Booker is in street clothes. Booker welcomes Tajiri to the fire so Tajiri fires (see what I did there?) off kicks. Tajiri gets caught by a beating and we go to the floor. Booker beats on him for about two minutes until the referee disqualifies him. Yeah keep making those young and popular guys look like jobbers WWF. Keep it up and see what’s going to happen with it.

Taker makes sure Sara wants to fight DDP tonight.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Sara

Sara is allowed a free slap. Page shoves her down so Undertaker pulls him to the floor, chokeslams him on the concrete, the bell rings and Sara gets the pin in four seconds. And AGAIN, a WCW guy is made to look like a joke, meaning there’s no point in caring about him at all. Stuff like this is probably one of the biggest reasons the Invasion failed (along with the McMahons and it lasting five months).

Here’s the whole Alliance for Steve Austin Appreciation Night. Some of them have gifts for Austin. Heyman is the master of ceremonies here. Hurricane says that Green Lantern has been his hero but now Austin is his hero. Didn’t he say this earlier? He’s going to wear an Austin shirt instead of the Green Lantern one. Kanyon gives him a Who Better Than Austin shirt. Debra gives him a plate of the famous Debra Cookies. Heyman saves him from having to eat one by airing a video package of Austin’s time in the Alliance. All five weeks of it.

Stephanie gets in and calls the rest of the Alliance in as well. And now, a song. Yes a song. It’s the high point of the camp value of this, minus the good aspect of it. Lillian is brought in to sing, and I couldn’t possibly make this up, Wind Beneath Our Ring. It’s a version of a Bette Middler song and the words are on the screen with a bouncing Austin head. Stephanie makes her start again for a lack of heart and soul.

Now Stephanie is going to lead it. JR: “Oh God not that.” It makes Vickie Guerrero sound like Shakira if you’re interested. Chavo sings some of it for some reason as does Terri. Even Raven sings as does Justin Credible. I’m in awe of this. Not because it’s good or anything, but because THIS IS AIRING ON MONDAY NIGHT RAW.

Austin thanks everyone for it and yells at Tazz for wearing a Tazz shirt. FINALLY Angle arrives in the milk truck to spray everyone down/ Stasiak takes a header into the truck which gets the only laugh of the show out of me. JR says the Billion Dollar Princess has just become the Dairy Queen to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. There’s nothing redeeming about this show at all. Nothing. The longest match is the twelve man tag at just over five minutes. Everything else is a squash with the Alliance guys being decimated AGAIN. Then to top it off, they sang a Bette Middler song until a guy came out and sprayed everyone down with milk. Even TNA would say that was stupid. Horrible HORRIBLE show and one of the worst I can remember in a long time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

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Monday Night Raw – August 19, 2013: Cut The Filler, Get To The Game

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 19, 2013
Location: Honda Center, Anaheim, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

A lot has changed since last night. First and foremost, Randy Orton is the new WWE Champion after cashing in on the previous new champion Daniel Bryan. Daniel beat Cena clean with a running knee to the head but HHH turned heel shortly thereafter, hitting Bryan with a Pedigree so Orton could take the title. Things should be very interesting tonight since Cena is going to be taking extended time off for elbow surgery. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the main events of last night. If you haven’t seen those, go out of your way to check them out as they’re both masterpieces.

Here’s Cena to open things up. He says he’s disgusted by what happened last night at Summerslam but has to stop for a Cena Sucks chant. A few months ago he said the next person to be WWE Champion would earn it and that’s exactly what Daniel Bryan did. Bryan brought out the best in him and reminded Cena that a WWE Superstar should be judged on what he can do in the ring. Two weeks ago WWE medical staff told him he had a torn tricep and the title match last night had to be postponed.

The elbow is not an excuse because he was beaten by the better man in a clean fight last night. Then last night he was in the trainer’s room getting looked at when he heard what HHH and Randy Orton did and he was disgusted. However now that he’s no longer WWE Champion he needs to have elbow surgery and will be gone for four to six months. Before he goes though, he wants to introduce a man who has earned his respect: Daniel Bryan.

Cena leaves and here’s a subdued Bryan to address the crowd. Before he can say anything though, here’s Stephanie McMahon to some horrible new music. She apologizes to Bryan for what happened but says HHH did what’s best for business. The fans chant no and Bryan thinks they disagree with Stephanie. Bryan talks about how HHH used to be a renegade in DX but now he’s gone corporate. He knew HHH would that because when he lays down with trash like Stephanie, you start to stink.

Stephanie says she’ll let that slide so Bryan wants to give her a cheer for it. If Stephanie fires her, he’ll go back to wrestling in armories and selling t-shirts out of his car. Bryan swears revenge and says he’ll give her a reason to fire him. Stephanie says she doesn’t want to fire him but Bryan and the people need to understand that not everyone can be the face of the company. Bryan is 5’8 and maybe 200lbs so he’s not WWE Championship material. Stephanie says that Bryan may not be an A but he’s a solid B+.

Instead of calling her something that starts with a B, Bryan goes on a rant about how he’ll be WWE Champion again. He knocks the mic out of her hand…..so she just gets another one. Anyway Stephanie says Bryan needs to calm down and she refuses to be intimidated. Security comes down to escort Bryan from the building and blames him for this. Bryan starts a NO chant as he leaves.

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Here’s a free Summerslam rematch with both guys in the ring as we come back from a break. Sandow charges into a knee to start and Cody does the single worst spot call I’ve ever seen, literally leaning over to whisper something in Sandow’s ear before getting backdropped to the apron. Back in and Cody clotheslines him to the floor for a snap suplex. Cody cranks on the arm a bit but gets forearmed to the outside. Rhodes goes up top but gets flipped down for two as we take a break.

Back to the boring match with Sandow putting on a chinlock. The Russian legsweep sets up the Wind-Up elbow for two before taking Cody to the top. Sandow’s belly to back superplex is countered and Cody “hits” a moonsault press but seems to have injured his leg in the process. He’s able to limp through the match but Cross Rhodes is countered into an Edge-O-Matic for two. The Terminus is countered into a Disaster Kick but Sandow rolls to the apron. Back in and Cody hooks a sunset flip out of the corner for the pin at 10:33.

Rating: D+. This got better at the end but the match took way too long to get going. At the end of the day, Sandow’s stock has fallen so far through the floor that a win over him hasn’t meant anything in months. Cody is at least getting a bit stronger but he needs wins over bigger names than Sandow.

GM Brad Maddox shows us some disparaging comments from Ziggler about HHH before announcing Ziggler vs. Shield tonight.

Here’s Heyman with something to say. Punk lost last night which was a lesson in rebellion. Heyman admits that Punk gave Lesnar the worst beating he can ever remember, but Brock still won. Now it’s time to end this family feud because Heyman is a better father to Punk than the man that sired him. Last night Big Brother Brock beat some sense into Punk and now Heyman forgives him. When Punk apologizes to Heyman, he’ll take Punk back and they’re reach new heights. He still loves Punk and is willing to put this behind them. Together, they’re the best in the world and they’ll be so again.

The Bellas and Funkadactyls are catty backstage.

AJ Lee/Layla vs. Funkadactyls

The non-cheerleaders jump the Funkadactyls to start until we get going with Naomi vs. AJ. AJ gets a quick two off a spin kick and chokes a lot. Naomi finally scores with an enziguri to escape but the tag brings in Layla who knocks Cameron to the floor. Using the distraction, Naomi scores a quick rollup for the pin on Layla at 2:22.

We recap the opening segment.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Shield

Ambrose starts for Shield and unsuccessfully tries to drive Dolph into the corner. Rollins comes in and gets in a shot to put Dolph down as the beating begins. Reigns comes in for some shots of his own and the beating begins. Shield takes turns working Ziggler over and there isn’t much to say here.

Ambrose puts on a chinlock but Dolph bites the hand to escape. Ziggler starts a comeback and scores with a dropkick but it’s back to Roman who walks into a dropkick as well. A Fameasser puts Reigns down and a DDT gets two. Ziggler suplexes Rollins to the floor where Seth is clutching his knee. Ziggler loads up the Stinger Splash but jumps into the spear for the pin at 6:07.

Rating: C-. Much like the first match this took awhile to get going but the second half of it was much better. Rollins being hurt could be something horrible though as just Ambrose and Reigns aren’t going to be as effective as just a two man team. They could get the tag belts through the Freebird Rule if nothing else though.

Rollins gets back in while hopping on one leg and there’s the Triple Bomb to lay Ziggler out.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Sin Cara

Del Rio jumps Sin Cara to start but gets armdragged down and out to the floor. A dive takes Alberto out and immediately asks the referee to come over while holding his hand. The referee holds up an X but Alberto throws him back in. The referee pulls Del Rio to the floor and rings the bell at about 55 seconds.

Post match Del Rio talks about being the Latino hero and the world champion. This brings out the returning Ricardo Rodriguez who says Del Rio isn’t a hero. Now he represents someone new: Rob Van Dam. I was expecting Rey but this works too. Rob takes out Del Rio but he rolls to the floor to avoid the Five Star.

Prime Time Players vs. Real Americans

Before the match, Colter goes into a rant about how evil foreigners at Disney Land are. Young starts with Cesaro and takes over with relative ease. Off to Titus who runs over Swagger before getting caught in Cesaro’s gutwrench suplex. Back to Swagger who has less luck but Titus gets caught by some double teaming. The Americans take turns on Titus but Swagger charges into a spinebuster. Hot tag brings in Young vs. Cesaro with Darren taking over. Everything breaks down and the fireman’s carry gutbuster (Gut Check) is good for the pin on Antonio at 4:50.

Rating: D. The match was nothing of note but if it’s Young’s push for coming out of the closet I can’t complain all that much. The Players have been hanging around the tag team scene for months now so it’s not like this is a huge jump up the card for them. They would likely work better as faces anyway.

Big Show says he and Henry are teaming up to go after the tag titles but Maddox interrupts. Apparently Big Show has had some bad things to say about HHH. Therefore tonight it’s Shield vs. Big Show where Shield doesn’t have to tag. Show asks if Brad wants to do that to Shield.

Justin Gabriel, Zack Ryder and a Foot Locker referee plug Foot Locker gear until Fandango and Summer Rae come in to do the same thing.

We look at last night’s main events again.

Ryback torments some other guy in the back by making him pick up his bag over and over. They wind up in the shower and Ryback sprays water into the guy’s bag after slapping him.

Big Show vs. Shield

Show throws Reigns to the floor to start and pounds both guys down with ease. Rollins’ knee seems to be ok. Big Show cleans house and throws the other guys to the floor with Seth holding his knee again. Reigns is speared down by Big Show and Ambrose pulls him to the floor. The numbers finally start catching up with Big Show but he shoves everyone down again.

Seth is thrown to the floor as Ambrose is beaten up. The chokeslam is broken up by Rollins and a dropkick staggers Big Show. Seth’s top rope knee to the head gets two but Show suplexes both of them down at once. Reigns is finally back in and spears Big Show down and the Triple Bomb ends him at 4:34.

Rating: D+. Even at four and a half minutes this felt too long. A lot of the middle part of the match was the same stuff over and over again which made it boring. The interesting thing here is Maddox sending Shield in over and over and potentially ticking them off, meaning they might turn on him. The interesting story makes up for the weaker match.

Here’s Punk with something to say. He talks about having a lot on his mind and yells at a fan for booing him. Punk wants to fight and offers to make the fan toothless right now. Heyman said he can get Punk the WWE Title and in the main event of Wrestlemania for an apology. If that’s what Heyman wants, come out here and get it. Cue Heyman along with Curtis Axel but Punk doesn’t let them say anything.

Punk says he’s sorry for not ripping Heyman’s arm off last night and knocking Heyman’s teeth out. Next time he’s choking Heyman out then waking him up so he can spit him in the face. Punk promises to get revenge and wants to do it right now. Heyman says the apology should come from him so he’s sorry for what Axel is about to do to Punk. He tells Axel to go tape up his hands for a fight because Punk has pushed Heyman too far once too often. If Punk is still in the ring when we get back, Axel is coming to the ring to take Punk apart.

Back from a break with Punk sitting in a chair. Axel comes out and gets beaten down in a non-match. They head to the floor where Axel gets in a few cheap shots but Punk sends him over the time keeper’s area. Punk goes after Heyman but stops to dive at Axel and hit him in the rips with the ring bell.

They head back inside and Punk goes for the GTS, only to have Curtis escape and go after the leg. Axel works on the leg a bit before hitting his finisher to lay Punk out. Curtis tries to Pillmanize the leg but Punk moves away and destroys Axel with the chair. A GTS onto the steps knocks Curtis out cold and Punk stares at Heyman.

R-Truth vs. Bray Wyatt

Truth charges at him but gets sent into the corner. Wyatt gets caught by Truth’s drop down into a side kick sequence but a Harper distraction lets Bray hit the cross body to take over. The corner splash sets up Sister Abigail for the pin at 2:35.

We get a vignette on bullfighters coming to WWE. It’s Primo and Epico in a new gimmick.

3MB vs. Usos

It’s Slater and Mahal tonight with Jey vs. Slater to start. Jey takes over on Slater before bringing on Jimmy to keep up the pace. Mahal gets in a cheap shot from the apron to take over before hooking a chinlock on Jimmy. Slater comes in again and pounds away as this match just keeps going. Jimmy finally gets in a shot to make the tag to Jey. Mahal comes in as well as everything breaks down. Jey dives through the ropes to take out the other Band members but tags in Jimmy at the same time. The Superfly Splash ends Mahal at 5:35.

Rating: D. Again just too long here. This show is full of filler matches and it’s getting tiresome. The injuries are starting to mount up for WWE and the results are matches like this. It didn’t have anything behind it and just filled in about seven minutes because there’s nothing else to put there. The solution? Make Smackdown three hours of course.

The Miz vs. Wade Barrett

Speaking of filler, there’s this match. Barrett hooks a quick headlock but gets caught in a flapjack. Miz hits the running clothesline in the corner but misses the ax handle. A big boot gets two on Miz and another big boot sends Miz to the outside. We hit the chinlock back inside before Miz comes back with a sunset flip for two.

Back to the chinlock as the fans cheer for Barrett. Miz comes back with a forearm to the head and a clothesline to send Barrett to the corner. He kicks Barrett in the leg and adds a running dropkick but Barrett kicks away the Figure Four attempt. Miz tries another sunset flip but hooks the Figure Four….only to have Fandango come in off the top with the legdrop for the DQ at 4:45.

Rating: D+. At least there’s a story to the ending of this one. Miz still doesn’t work as a face and the Figure Four is a big reason for that. It’s not that he’s even bad at it anymore but the move just doesn’t fit him at all. He got to the WWE Title and won in the main event of Wrestlemania with the other move so he switches it up? Seriously?

Maddox tells Stephanie that Daniel Bryan is back in the building. She says thank you and goes into Vince’s office.

Back from a break with Vince and Stephanie in the ring and HHH coming to the ring with the roster on the stage. Shield is standing guard at ringside. Vince praises HHH for doing the right thing and says he finally saw the light. HHH says it’s time for his explanation. He didn’t throw away the future, but rather he did it to save the future. HHH did it for the people on the stage, for Vince’s father and grandfather, for his father in law, for his wife, for his kids and for the people in the audience.

HHH didn’t do it to screw Daniel Bryan. In fact he’s a big fan of Bryan, who is a great little technician. Bryan had a great match last night and won the title, but he can’t be the WWE Champion or the face of the company. Last night HHH made sure the people didn’t have to settle for a B when they can have an A+. Bryan has a personal issue but what about HHH’s personal problems? He didn’t like having to bury Bryan’s fifteen years of experience and calls Bryan selfish for having a problem with this.

Bryan needs to check his ego at the door like HHH does every week when he goes to work. The fans chant for Bryan but HHH brings out Orton as the ultimate show of burying his personal problems. Orton comes out to hug Stephanie because time heals all borderline rapes in WWE. Orton thanks HHH for causing this and demands that the fans appreciate the Game. HHH takes the mic back and asks Bryan to come out here and get it all out at once. Shield is excused so Bryan will actually come out. HHH starts a YES chant and asks Bryan to come out with his music playing.

Bryan comes out from the side of the stage and Shield immediately jumps him. He fights them off for a bit but Reigns spears him down. They load up the Triple Bomb but HHH calls them off and says Bryan gets to say what he wants. He finally gets in the ring but walks into an RKO to put him down. The new Corporation stands tall to close the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a good show for the storyline stuff but the show itself was a BIG drag. As usual, if you cut an hour out of this it’s a great show but with the extra stuff in there it’s just too much. Cena leaving is a very interesting story, but I’m afraid it might set him up as the savior in a few months. I like the heel super stable as they have a TON of power and it seemingly came out of nowhere. Good show here but it’s mainly for the opening and closing segments.

Results

Cody Rhodes b. Damien Sandow – Sunset Flip

Funkadactyls b. AJ Lee/Layla – Rollup to Layla

Shield b. Dolph Ziggler – Spear

Alberto Del Rio b. Sin Cara via referee stoppage

Prime Time Players b. Real Americans – Gut Check to Cesaro

Shield b. Big Show – Triple Bomb

Bray Wyatt b. R-Truth – Sister Abigail

Usos b. 3MB – Superfly Splash to Mahal

The Miz b. Wade Barrett via DQ when Fandango interfered

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