Smackdown – July 11, 2008: The Not So Wedding Show

Smackdown
Date: July 11, 2008
Location: River Center, Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

It’s been a minute since I’ve done one of these and I’m barely remembering what we’re dealing with at the moment. HHH is ready to defend the Smackdown World Title against Edge at the Great American Bash, though Edge and Vickie Guerrero are having some troubles, to the point where their wedding is off. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Edge’s recent issues, from losing the World Title to CM Punk to his problems with Vickie Guerrero. Edge thinking that yelling at his boss/fiance was a good idea wasn’t his greatest moment.

Here is- Edge to get things going. He has had a week to think about what he said to Vickie Guerrero last week….and the wedding is STILL off. He’s happier without Vickie because he’s better than her. At the Great American Bash, he can prove everyone wrong by winning the World Title again.

He has won more titles than anyone else in this industry and he will prove how great he is again at the Great American Bash when he beats HHH. Cue Vickie Guerrero (Vickie: “Excuse me, baby.”) to say the wedding being canceled isn’t her loss. Vickie gives him a match tonight: a No DQ match against the Big Show. Edge says he isn’t afraid and promises to make Show a loser like her. Vickie has his mic cut off.

Video on Maria.

Matt Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. Matt takes him into the corner to start and we actually get a clean break. Back up and Matt grabs a headlock for some careful grinding. Benjamin sends him into the corner and hits a neckbreaker for two. The neck crank goes on as Benjamin certainly has a target so far. That’s broken up and Benjamin misses the Stinger Splash, allowing Hardy to start the comeback.

It’s too early for the Twist of Fate so Hardy settles for a corner clothesline/bulldog. The top rope elbow to the back of the head gives Matt two but Benjamin is right back with the exploder for the same. Matt is back up to try the Twist of Fate but Benjamin grabs the rope and hits…well it was supposed to be Paydirt but Matt fell the wrong way, making it kind of a jumping clothesline. Either way, it gives Benjamin the upset pin.

Rating: C. The ending was a surprise and it was even a clean pin, which doesn’t make for the best future for Matt and the title. For now though, Benjamin getting a push isn’t a bad thing, but he couldn’t have put his feet on the ropes here? Nice job on the surprise pin, though I’m not wild on the way they got there.

The Edgeheads are in Vickie Guerrero’s office and say the three of them don’t deserve Edge’s abuse. Instead, they want to face Jesse and Festus, with Vickie making the match.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Domino

MVP is on commentary and gets a few jabs from Kennedy during the pre-match chat. Kennedy takes him down to start and hits a corner clothesline, with Domino bailing out to the floor. Back in and Domino manages a quick slam and legdrop but Kennedy fights up again. Some elbows to the face and a running boot in the corner have Domino in trouble, setting up the Mic Check to give Kennedy the pin.

Rating: C. They kept this short here and that is how it should have gone as the point was for MVP and Kennedy to be in the same place, likely with something happening after the match. Both of them could use this feud as they could both go or a boost. Domino does not seem long for this place, as he could not have been more of a jobber here.

Post match Umaga runs in and wrecks Kennedy.

Chavo Guerrero, with Bam Neely, gives Edge a pep talk and says he’s going to give Vickie Guerrero a piece of his mind.

Post break Chavo offers Vickie that piece of his mind….which is about how horrible Edge is and how the Guerreros have to stick together. Vickie doesn’t buy it (my goodness intelligence!) and gives Chavo a match with HHH instead.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Finlay/Hornswoggle

Non-title. Finlay and Morrison start things off as JR goes on a mini rant about Edge and Vickie’s drama. Miz’s cheap shot earns him a flip over the top so Finlay beats up both of them at once. Hornswoggle comes in for some Stunners (JR: “Next thing you know he’ll be drinking beer!”) but a double dropkick cuts him off. An enziguri hits a kneeling Morrison though and it’s Finlay coming in to clean house. The Celtic Cross connects but Miz makes the save. That earns him a shillelagh shot, followed by the Tadpole Splash to give Hornswoggle the pin.

Rating: C. Nothing is getting a ton of time this week and that doesn’t exactly make me interested in seeing the longer form rematch. This probably sets up a pay per view title match and at least there was some cheating to get us to the rematch. It’s still a bad night for the champs though and that isn’t the best thing to see.

Video on Jeff Hardy’s Mission: Impossible themed photo shoot as he chases the World Title.

HHH vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title and Bam Neely is here with Chavo. HHH fights out of a headlock to start and elbows him in the face, which does not sit well with Chavo early on. Chavo’s arm wringing gets him punched in the face and HHH starts in on the arm. Chavo comes back with some right hands and Neely’s cheap shot sets up a crossface chickenwing of all things. That’s broken up so HHH hits the running knee. The spinebuster cuts Chavo off again and, after decking Neely, HHH grabs the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: C. Well at least the champion won for once, even if it was in another short match. Then again, it’s nice to have a showcase for the World Champion for a change as you don’t get to see that often enough. Chavo getting punished for trying to play Vickie and Edge at the same time was nice too and the match went well, which shouldn’t be a surprise.

Michelle McCool/Cherry vs. Natalya/Maryse

Michelle takes Maryse down to start as Foley explains how to pronounce Maryse. A dropkick gives Michelle two and it’s off to Cherry for a Hennig necksnap. Maryse runs over to bring in Natalya, who easily slams Cherry. Natalya gets in a kick to the leg and grabs the Sharpshooter for the fast pin. Did they suddenly get a go home cue or something?

Post match Natalya beats up Michelle and suplexes her on the floor.

Jesse & Festus vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Jesse slugs away at Hawkins to start and stomps him down in the corner. Ryder comes in but so does Festus with the latter getting to clean house. Festus clears the ring and Hawkins and Ryder just take the countout.

Post match the bell has turned Festus into a zombie again so Hawkins and Ryder beat down Jesse. They were being scientific….until Jesse rings the bell so Festus can wreck the villains.

Video on HHH.

Stevie Richards vs. Vladimir Kozlov

Kozlov has gained entrance music and runs him over with a shoulder to start. Some knees to the ribs and a fireman’s carry put Richards down and we hit the bodyscissors. Back up and Richards hammers away, only to get headbutted down for the pin.

Edge yells at Chavo Guerrero until the Edgeheads come in. The argument keeps going until Vickie Guerrero comes in. If anyone else tries to help Edge, or if Edge walks out on the match, they’re fired.

Raw Rebound.

Great American Bash rundown.

Edge vs. Big Show

No DQ and Vickie Guerrero is watching from the stage. Show starts fast and takes him to the floor for a ram into the barricade. The announcers’ table takes too long to load up though and Edge gets in a quick spear as we take an early break. Back with Show cutting off a kendo stick shot and throwing Edge into the steps and over the barricade without much effort. Edge comes back with a bulldog off of said barricade and they both get a breather.

A kendo stick to Show’s head lets them go back inside, where Edge’s choke manages to take Show down again. That’s broken up with a belly to back suplex but the chokeslam is countered into a DDT. Edge brings in a chair but charges a bit too hard, allowing Show to punch it into his face. For some reason that doesn’t know Edge silly and he’s back with a low blow. The Conchairto is loaded up but Show is up with a chokeslam. Show loads up his own Conchairto, only to have Vickie say stop the match. The bell rings and Vickie comes in to check on Edge.

Rating: C+. This felt like a house show street fight and that is probably something they have done more than once. The ending was more important though and that is going to lead to the next step in the rather long Edge/Vickie saga. Putting someone against Big Show is a pretty standard punishment, so everything here made sense, even if it wasn’t an instant classic.

Edge and Vickie reconcile to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The ending is the big story here as there wasn’t much else on the rest of the show. They did well enough with Edge and Vickie, but that’s about all there is on here, with even HHH not feeling that important. HHH vs. Edge/Vickie is a big time feud and having it take place at a mid level pay per view like the Great American Bash is certainly a weird choice. Smackdown needs another good story though as there just isn’t much going on around here.

 

 

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Smackdown – May 2, 1999: They’re Here Too

Smackdown
Date: September 2, 1999
Location: Centrum, Worcester, Massachusetts
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

It’s the second regular episode of the show and in theory that means things are still going to be stacked for the time being. The WWF is going to want to get as much attention to this show as they can right off the bat and they’re coming in hot with HHH as the new WWF Champion. Other than that, Unforgiven is coming up so the build might begin soon. Let’s get to it.

Here is Monday Night Raw if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Chyna vs. Billy Gunn

The winner gets an Intercontinental Title shot. Hold on though as here is Intercontinental Champion Jeff Jarrett (with Debra and Miss Kitty) to join commentary. Chyna pulls down her trunks to get to Gunn to start, earning herself a kick into the corner. Gunn grabs a delayed vertical suplex but Chyna is right back with a DDT for two.

An elbow to the face drops Chyna as Jarrett wants more aggression. Chyna is sent outside and hang on as she seems to have hurt her elbow. Tis but goldbricking of course though as Chyna sends him into the steps to take over again. Back in and the referee gets bumped, meaning Gunn’s Fameasser gets no count. Cue HHH with a Pedigree to Gunn to give Chyna the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one as they blazed through it and then had the interference. Granted for 1999, that’s a pretty clean finish, as there were only three people involved. Chyna vs. Jarrett for the title is a big enough deal, as Chyna continues to be completely unlike any woman wrestling has ever seen. If nothing else, Gunn vs. HHH has potential to be…I’m not sure what that would be actually but it seems to be where we are going, even if it is for the short term.

Here is a ticked off Big Show to say he is tired of the “ink sack carcass of dead meat” the Undertaker giving him all of this tough love so get down here NOW. Instead he gets Paul Bearer, who doesn’t like that kind of rudeness to Undertaker. Show drops him with one shot and demands the man instead of the messenger.

Cue Undertaker to get in Show’s face and whisper something in his ear. That leaves Show confused, but Undertaker says Show did a good number on Bearer. Then Undertaker grabs Show by the throat and says if he ever disrespects him like that again, he’ll choke Show with his own tongue. Bearer wakes up and looks stunned as the other two leave. The evil alliance continues, and that should be a good thing going forward as you can always use a pair of giants.

Here is Mankind to talk about…..playing electronic football as a kid. He happened to be naked at the time and his mother walked in. That was the most embarrassing moment of his career, at least until he lost to Shane McMahon. Therefore, he wants revenge, but he also wants to talk about the Rock. He admires the Rock’s testicular fortitude for facing Big Show and Undertaker on his own, which is what made Mankind want to be his partner.

Cue the Rock (with Mankind trying to start his own ROCKY chant) to say they’re partners but they’re not friends. Rock does recognize how crazy Mankind is but he NEVER wants Mankind to talk about Rock’s testicles again. Cue Shane McMahon, with HHH and Chyna, to interrupt. Shane brags about HHH being World Champion and knows Rock and Mankind want a title shot. That’s why they can meet in a #1 contenders match later tonight, and if they don’t bring it, they’re suspended for six months.

Also tonight, HHH gets to defend against a bald headed SOB. HHH panics, though Shane never said any name. With the villains gone, Mankind reminds Rock that he beat him for the WWF Title the last time they were in this very building. Mankind suggests that Rock could go easy on him tonight (Mankind: “That sounds cool to Mankind.”) but that isn’t going to happen. Instead, Rock threatens to shine the title up real nice and stick it inside Mankind, though Mankind doesn’t think it’ll fit. These two have amazing chemistry and Mankind’s reactions are always hilarious.

There is a limo waiting in the back.

Howard Finkel, as brainwashed by Chris Jericho, interrupts Tony Chimmel for embarrassing him….so let’s have a tuxedo match. The winner can be the ring announcer for the show, but Chimmel isn’t interested. Finkel is ready to go, and then decks Chimmel anyway. Let’s just ring the bell and get this over with.

Tony Chimmel vs. Howard Finkel

Tuxedo match and Chimmel gets Fink’s jacket off as Chris Jericho is watching in the back. Fink loses his shirt and pants, revealing the red underwear. The rest of the clothes come off as this was the rare stripping match squash.

X-Pac asks Kane to stay in the back tonight so he won’t be seen as Kane’s little buddy again.

Mankind respects The Rock, but tonight he can become #1 contender in the same arena where he became WWF Champion before. Oh and he’ll try to avoid Rock doing something to him with a belt.

HHH is worried about Shane McMahon’s announcement but Chyna tries to calm him down.

During the break, Chris Jericho suggested Howard Finkel become an underwear model. I didn’t expect to hear that today.

Chris Jericho vs. X-Pac

Hold on though as cue Ken Shamrock to chase Jericho away before the bell. X-Pac calms Shamrock down (that’s impressive) and then kicks Jericho in the face to start. A belly to back suplex gives X-Pac two and here are Big Show and Undertaker to watch from the stage. Jericho gets knocked off the top and out to the floor but manages to cut off a baseball slide to take over. A suplex back inside gives Jericho an arrogant two but he dives into a raised boot. X-Pac makes the comeback, including the flipping clothesline for two, followed by the kick to the head in the corner. The Bronco Buster connects but Big Show comes in to jump X-Pac for the DQ.

Rating: C+. Jericho is still off to a bit of a weird start around here but at least he has a feud going with Shamrock. At the same time, you have X-Pac in the lands of the giants and it still isn’t quite working. Seeing him getting beaten up over and over makes sense, but it’s a stretch to buy him hanging in there when he actually faces these giants. X-Pac is very talented, though there comes a point where it’s hard to believe what you’re seeing.

Post match Show goes after X-Pac as Shamrock runs back out to chase Jericho off. Kane runs in to save X-Pac but Undertaker, still on the stage, says Kane caring for X-Pac makes him weaker.

Post break Shamrock can’t get into Jericho’s locker room.

HHH wants an explanation from Shane McMahon but gets nothing.

WWF Title: HHH vs. ???

HHH is defending and here is Shane to introduce his bald headed SOB opponent: GILLBERG, whose Light Heavyweight Title isn’t on the line. Suddenly HHH and Shane are fine again, even as Gillberg hits a spear to start fast. A gordbuster gets HHH out of trouble though and the beating is on in the corner. Shane joins commentary as Gillberg fights back, only to miss a spear and hit the post. The Pedigree retains the title fast.

Post match HHH grabs a chair, punches out the referee, and wrecks Gillberg’s knee.

We recap Big Boss Man kidnapping Al Snow’s dog Pepper. Boss Man told Snow to come to his hotel room this week and he’ll get Pepper back.

Earlier today, Snow went to the hotel room where Boss Man (who Snow keeps calling Ray in a rare moment for Boss Man) says Pepper is at the cleaners. Boss Man offers him some food, which Snow eats….and is then told that it’s his dog cooked up. Snow, with the chair stuck to him, is immediately sick, so Boss Man knocks him out and beats him up.

Ken Shamrock is still looking for Chris Jericho.

The Rock vs. Mankind

The winner gets HHH for the WWF Title at Unforgiven. They fight to the floor in a hurry and Rock suplexes him on the ramp. Mankind is right back with a hard whip into the steps (or chairs, according to Cole). Hold on though as Mankind grabs a headset to do Rock’s mid-match commentary deal, earning himself another beating so Rock can show him the right way to do this.

Back in and a double arm DDT plants Rock, meaning it’s time for Mr. Socko. The referee gets bumped so here is Shane McMahon to take over. A Rock Bottom gets Rock out of trouble but here are HHH and Chyna to beat on the two of them. That’s enough for Shane to call for the bell.

Rating: C+. They didn’t have time to do much but my goodness the chemistry that these two have is insane every time. It was on display here, even if they were rushed and got to the screwy ending on top. Mankind knows how to play off the Rock so well and Rock looks like he wants to like him just a bit, making this one of the weirdest relationships in WWF history.

Shane calls it a double DQ and I think you know where this is going.

Post break, Shane promises to make it up to Rock and Mankind.

Val Venis vs. Ken Shamrock

Shamrock is in jeans instead of trunks here as he has been looking for Chris Jericho all night. Venis hammers away to start but has to bail from the threat of an ankle lock. Back in and Venis hammers away again, only to get pulled into the ankle lock for the fast tap. Well that was quick.

Post match Shamrock won’t let go, but an invading Steve Blackman breaks it up. Shamrock beats him up too but here is Chris Jericho to call Shamrock out to fight him outside. The chase is on and Howard Finkel, dressed as Jericho, maces Shamrock. Jericho gets the Walls and Fink takes pictures, leaving Jericho to shout I KILLED KENNY! Then Fink is thrown into the trunk of Jericho’s car as Jericho speeds off. Jericho was still figuring it out but you could feel the energy every time he’s on screen.

Here are Shane McMahon, HHH and Chyna to “make it right” with Mankind and The Rock. Shane says they can get out here in five seconds and starts a fast count, only to be cut off by Test. He calls all three of them girls and brings out the other owners of the WWF: Linda and Stephanie McMahon! Linda says that since Vince McMahon isn’t here tonight, the two of them hold controlling interest over Shane (I don’t think that’s how ownership works). Therefore, tonight it’s Rock/Mankind vs. Shane/HHH, which Shane makes a Tag Team Title match.

During the break, Shane tried to get HHH to see this as a positive but HHH seems to be rather chill.

We look at the four corner #1 contenders match from Raw, with Cole calling it a “train wreck”.

Tag Team Gauntlet

The winners get a future Tag Team Title shot and it’s the Hollys in at #1 and Mideon/Viscera in at #2. Viscera splashes Crash in the corner to start and the big legdrop to the back of the head makes it worse. Mideon’s pumphandle slam gets two but Crash reverses a powerbomb into a hurricanrana for two. Everything breaks down and Viscera splashes Mideon by mistake, giving Hardcore the fast pin.

Droz/Prince Albert are in at #3, with Albert quickly taking Crash down. Crash eyepokes his way to freedom and it’s back to Hardcore vs. Droz in the most 1999 match around. A quick Falcon Arrow pins Droz and it’s the Hardyz (still the New Brood) in at #4. Matt moonsaults in onto Crash for the pin in about ten seconds and the Acolytes are in at #5.

Bradshaw hammers Matt down but Jeff comes in for a save as the pace picks up. Matt hits a neckbreaker on Faarooq and Jeff adds the Swanton. That’s not enough for a cover though, as the Clothesline From Bradshaw knocks Jeff out of the air for the pin. Blue Meanie/Stevie Richards are in at #6 but Meanie takes so long dancing to the ring that Richards gets pinned in about 15 seconds.

Edge and Christian are in at #7 with Edge tornado DDTing Bradshaw. Faarooq sends Christian into the steps but….the Dudley Boyz make their debut and deck everyone with 2x4s for the double DQ. Still no #1 contenders, but that might take things in a rather new direction.

Rating: C-. Negative points for the screwy finish, but the Dudleys debuting might make up for a bit of it. The biggest problem here was the same thing happens in every fast paced gauntlet match: it’s a little hard to buy that these people can win a fall in about 30 seconds here while it takes so much longer in a regular match. The chaos in the division continues, but said division just got a heck of a lot stronger.

Post match, the Dudleys talked about how they are the best team in the world and are here to prove it. You need to remember three things: thou shall not steal, thou shall not kill and thou shall not mess with the Dudleys. Bubba’s stutter didn’t quite fit here as it comes off as comedy rather than the otherwise serious vibe.

Tag Team Titles: Shane McMahon/HHH vs. The Rock/Mankind

Rock/Mankind are defending and Chyna is here with the challengers. The fight is on before Rock comes to the ring but he’s right there to make the save. Shane gets sent outside but a Chyna distraction lets HHH get in a chair shot to drop Mankind. Back in and Shane hammers away but Mankind punches him right back down. With that not working, HHH comes back in with a suplex and Shane adds a middle rope elbow for two.

HHH’s jumping knee gets the same as this is oddly slow paced. The Bronco Buster takes too long for Shane though and it’s a clothesline from Rock to put him down. Shane is smart enough to offer a distraction though, allowing Chyna to get in a low blow. As usual, the hot tag brings in Rock a few seconds later and house is cleaned. Everything breaks down and Shane gets knocked over the announcers’ table….as Billy Gunn runs in to take out HHH. The Rock Bottom into the People’s Elbow retains the titles.

Rating: C+. This was probably the best match of the night, which is due to the talent involved, as well as things making sense. It was still over the top because it had Shane doing his thing, but it also made sense with the story setup and the interference from Gunn. For a not very long TV main event, this went well.

Overall Rating: C+. The best thing about this time is that the Attitude Era, or at least its signature nature, is really starting to cool down. Things are still moving at a fast pace, but it isn’t completely insane. You have people doing things to each other, but it isn’t so over the top with the nuttiness (Pepper ordeal aside) where you would have to ask “what does this have to do with wrestling”. Things are starting to transition a bit and that is a nice breather after how far things went in the other direction. Throw in the Dudleys debuting for the historic moment and this was a pretty good show.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – August 30, 1999: The Saving Grace?

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 30, 1999
Location: FleetCenter, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

As usual, it’s been a minute since we’ve been here and things have been changing a bit. HHH is the new WWF Champion, having defeated Mankind last week. He also successfully defended the title against the Rock last week on the debut of a new show called Smackdown. We’re on the way to Unforgiven and the card needs to get started so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is the Rock to get things going and yep the people seem to like him. After declaring that he is FINALLY in Boston again, Rock blames a wannabe cowboy commissioner named Shawn Michaels for costing him the WWF Title on Smackdown. Rock is going to take Shawn’s little cowboy hat, spin his six shooter around, and stick it, uh, somewhere. He calls out HHH for a fight but doesn’t get him, which sends Rock to the back to find HHH himself. We cut to the Rock in the back, where HHH, Chyna and Shane McMahon all jump him in a hallway. Mankind makes the save.

Here are Shane McMahon and the Mean Street Posse for a chat. Shane has heard that Rock and Mankind want a WWF Title shot tonight so they can have it….if they can defeat their respective opponents. We’ll start with the Rock, who gets to face the Undertaker in a no holds barred, falls count anywhere match. As for Mankind, Shane beat him last week but first, Mankind attacked the Mean Street Posse. That’s why tonight, Mankind has to beat all of them RIGHT NOW!

Mankind vs. Mean Street Posse

If Mankind wins, he gets a WWF Title shot against HHH tonight. Oh and Shane McMahon will be the guest referee! As expected, it’s a triple teaming to start but Mankind fights back like he’s Mankind and they’re the Mean Street Posse. The beating is on with Mankind hitting the running knee in the corner on Rodney but Joey Abs gets in a chair shot (behind Shane’s back of course) for a breaker.

Back in and Joey (with his foot in a cast) stomps away as Pete throws in a trashcan. Shane misses the beating but does stop to yell at them, allowing a double suplex to get two on Mankind. Joey’s street sign hits Rodney by mistake but Shane has hurt his ankle. A shovel to the head drops Joey but Shane won’t count. That earns Shane the Mandible Claw, which draws in HHH for the brawl. The match is thrown out with Mankind being declared the winner by DQ, but Shane makes the correction (as Lilian Garcia seemed to mess up).

Rating: C-. There was only so much you could get out of this was it wasn’t going to be anything more than a joke. That’s what the Posse was there for, but they didn’t bother trying to do anything more than goofy nonsense. They had to have a way to keep Mankind from getting the title shot and these shenanigans are as good as they could have done, all things considered.

Undertaker, with Big Show and Paul Bearer, isn’t worried about facing the Rock tonight. He’s ready to shove a soup bone down Rock’s throat, as Undertaker isn’t exactly speaking like his normal self here.

Undertaker vs. The Rock

No Holds Barred and Falls Count Anywhere, which is different than hardcore because there’s probably going to be a hardcore match later. Undertaker has Big Show and Paul Bearer with him and Rock gets a WWF Title match later tonight if he wins. Actually never mind, as Undertaker doesn’t think Rock has earned the right to do this so Big Show is doing it instead.

Big Show vs. The Rock

Same everything as before as that’s a lot to type again. Undertaker is on commentary (that’s a WEIRD one) and Rock is in street clothes as he punches away at Show to start. A clothesline puts Show on the floor but he sends Rock into the barricade to slow him down. Rock is fine enough to hit a Russian legsweep on the ramp but Show knocks him down again without too much trouble.

Back in and Show misses a charge into the corner so they head right back to the floor. Rock slips out of a ram into the post though and puts on a headset, offering to slap the dead off Undertaker’s head. A right hand drops Undertaker but the distraction lets Show chokeslam Rock through the announcers’ table for the pin. Lilian: “Your winner, the Undertaker!”

Rating: C. This didn’t have time to go anywhere, but at least they got in a hardcore match in about three and a half minutes. Throw in the fact that they managed to have two of the three biggest heroes in the company lose in the first 40 or so minutes of the show and that’s not too bad. That’s a rather Russo style show for you and I have a feeling it’s going to get even worse.

Post match HHH comes out to go after Rock but Undertaker grabs him by the throat. Cue Mankind to go after Show and Undertaker, allowing HHH to escape.

Al Snow is rather upset about Big Boss Man stealing his dog Pepper. As he pleas for people to help him, we can hear sounds of some rather adult actions taking place off screen.

Here is Big Boss Man for a chat. He asks for and gets Al Snow out here, with Boss Man saying Snow lived up to his end of the bargain on SmackDown. Then Snow was crying on Heat and Boss Man got the feeling. Snow keeps asking where Pepper is and Boss Man tells him to come to his hotel this week on Smackdown and he’ll get Pepper back. They even shake on it.

We look back at Chris Jericho putting Road Dogg through a table on Smackdown and injuring his back, putting Dogg on the shelf for a long time.

X-Pac vs. Taka Michinoku

Funaki is here with Taka. X-Pac hammers away to start but Funaki gets in a cheap shot. Taka knocks him outside and gets in a few shots, only to miss a moonsault back inside. A sitout powerbomb sets up the Bronco Buster and the X Factor for the fast pin on Taka.

Rating: C. X-Pac is in a weird place here as he’s too big to be fighting these smaller guys but not big enough to be in the main event scene. What matters is the fans are behind him though and he is more than good enough in the ring to back it up. They just have to find the right way to use him though and this was just a way to keep him warm.

Post match X-Pac takes out an invading Funaki as well. X-Pac says he wants the big guys.

Edge and Christian vs. The Acolytes vs. The Hollys vs. The Hardys

Elimination rules and the winners get a Tag Team Title match. It’s a brawl to start but Viscera, Mideon, Prince Albert, Droz, Stevie Richards and the Blue Meanie come in for the no contest. In a four way elimination match. In about a minute. The referees breaking it up takes longer than the match.

Here is the Rock to say Undertaker and Big Show didn’t impress anyone so he wants a handicap match tonight. First though, he wants to stick Undertaker’s head inside Big Show. Mickey Mouse tattoos are mentioned as well. Cue Mankind to say he didn’t like the Rock at some point, but now the people want and need him to be the Rock’s partner for a shot at the Tag Team Titles. Mankind even loads up Rock’s catchphrase but Rock cuts him off and says sure. Just DON’T YOU EVER steal his catchphrases again, but Mankind even rips off the IF YOU SMELL, which has Rock annoyed.

Here is Meat, with Terri Runnels, for a chat, but Terri hits on the Rock on the way up the ramp. He isn’t impressed. Hold on though as we get a GTV segment of Meat and Marianna, shall we say enjoying each other behind the interview set earlier. Terri goes after Meat but here are Marianna and Chaz (her boyfriend) for the big brawl.

Miss Kitty helps with Debra’s hair because the hair stylist has no idea what she is doing.

Jeff Jarrett/Mark Henry vs. D’Lo Brown/Billy Gunn

Debra and Miss Kitty are here with Jarrett and here is Chyna to do commentary. Brown clotheslines Jarrett down to start and something like a Sky High gets two. Jeff gets in a shot of his own and it’s Henry coming in for a gorilla press drop. Choking on the rope ensues as Kitty works on Debra’s hair. A clothesline puts Brown down as Chyna promises to get revenge and Jeff Jarrett’s Intercontinental Title. Brown gets in a shot of his own and everything breaks down. The distraction lets Chyna come in with the guitar….which hits Gunn by mistake, giving Jarrett the pin.

Rating: C. It wasn’t even four minutes long but it was nice to have a pretty run of the mill tag match until the screwy ending. There is nothing wrong with putting two potential title matches together, but Chyna seems more likely to get the Intercontinental Title shot (signing a contract helps). That’s more interesting than Gunn, which is the case with just about anything.

Test names Pat Patterson and Gerald Brisco the best men for his wedding to Stephanie McMahon. Whichever has the better memory gets to hold the ring.

Gangrel vs. Ken Shamrock

Gangrel has the Hardys with him, with commentary getting on Lilian Garcia for not calling them the New Brood. The bell rings and you can hear what sounds like a fire extinguisher putting out the Brood’s ring of fire entrance. Shamrock goes for the leg to start and Gangrel heads straight to the floor. Gangrel slugs away outside but the Hardys’ distraction is enough to get them ejected. Back in and Shamrock can’t quite get the ankle lock so Gangrel elbows him in the face. Shamrock kicks away and elbows him in the face, setting up the ankle lock for the tap.

Rating: C. It’s almost weird to see a match from this era getting about five minutes and of all their options, it’s Gangrel vs. Ken Shamrock? Gangrel wasn’t the biggest threat to Shamrock but it was nice to have him doing something other than drinking red liquid. Shamrock was in a weird place at this point and needs something to do, as just beating up Gangrel isn’t the most interesting.

Post match avowed Jericholic Howard Finkel introduces Chris Jericho, who says he isn’t coming out here to fight Shamrock. Instead, Shamrock can show up at Smackdown and clean his boots. Shamrock gives a slow motion chase.

Mankind wants to do the People’s Elbow but Rock tells him to stick with the sock gimmick. Mankind: “Mr. Socko.”

Here is Women’s Champion Ivory for a chat. After yelling at Michael Cole for undressing her with his eyes, she declares that she is not a sl**. Tori on the other hand is, so here is Tori to jump Ivory (and hitting Cole in the process), with Luna Vachon and Jacqueline coming in to join the brawl.

We look at Big Show chokeslamming Rock through the announcers’ table earlier.

Tag Team Titles: Big Show/Undertaker vs. Mankind/The Rock

Show and Undertaker are defending and Show hammers Mankind down to start as Undertaker doesn’t look overly interested. Undertaker gets in some shots to Mankind on the floor, with Rock having to make a save back inside. The bearhug goes on (showing how big Show really is) until Mankind punches his way to freedom. With that not working, Show punches him outside for another beating from Undertaker.

Mankind gets dropped on what is left of the broken announcers’ table as Paul Bearer comes out. Bearer says something to Undertaker, who walks out as Mankind gets in a shot of his own. The hot tag brings in Rock to clean house, only to have Show plant him with a chokeslam. Mankind’s chair is knocked into his face before Show’s delayed cover gets two on Rock. The referee gets bumped though and Rock BLASTS Show in the head with the chair. A double People’s Elbow gives Rock the pin and the titles.

Rating: C. This was another rare match that got some time and it helps a little bit, but there were so many things going on through the match that you can only get so much out of it. Between the chair shot, the ref bump and the Bearer/Undertaker stuff, it was hard to get into things. Throw in the fact that the Tag Team Titles mean nothing and this is little more than a big pop at the end without much else going on to get there. Kind of like most of the Attitude Era when you think about it.

Overall Rating: C+. It was another show with all kinds of stuff going on at the same time, but the addition of Smackdown can help things out a bit. If nothing else, it is nice to see some of the rapid fire stories siphoned off to Smackdown instead of doing everything on Raw for a change. It was a show with a bit more coherent string of stories throughout and we should be in for some good things on the way towards Unforgiven. Nice stuff here, with Smackdown possibly being the saving grace.

 

 

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – April 1, 2008: They Needed This

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: April 1, 2008
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re done with Wrestlemania and thankfully that means we have a new ECW Champion. Kane won the pre-show battle royal and then beat Chavo Guerrero in about ten seconds to win the title. That alone makes the show feel more important, but now we get to see where they go from here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Kane winning the battle royal and the title at Wrestlemania.

Here is Kane to recap winning the battle royal and the title at Wrestlemania. Kane says we haven’t seen anything yet, so here is CM Punk, with Money in the Bank briefcase, to interrupt. That earns him a threat from Kane, but Punk says he’s out here to say he’s a bit jealous. Punk explains the idea of Money in the Bank but here is Chavo Guerrero to interrupt. He’s getting the title match next because Kane’s title win was a fluke! Kane: “I beat you in eight seconds!”

Punk talks about how that has to be some kind of a record but Chavo laughs him off. Chavo promises to win the title back next time. For tonight though, it’s tag match time, with Chavo and Shelton Benjamin vs. Kane/Punk. Cue Shelton to say the only reason Punk is standing there is he got double teamed on Sunday. Punk calls Benjamin Goldilocks and says the one thing Benjamin can’t call himself is Mr. Money In The Bank. This was quite the wordy exchange.

Mike Knox vs. Stevie Richards

Knox takes him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs to start but Richards manages a trip to the floor. Richards’ dive off the apron is elbowed out of the air, followed by the bearhug back inside. A belly to back suplex cuts off Stevie’s comeback attempt but Stevie kicks his way out of trouble. Knox shrugs it off though and grabs a backbreaker, followed by the spinning Downward Spiral for the pin.

Rating: C-. Pretty nothing match here as Knox is about as generic of a heel as you can get and Richards has been beaten into the ground. There isn’t much else that can be said about these two feuding, but for some reason they have been going back and forth for a few weeks now. Hopefully it wraps up soon, though neither is exactly interesting at the moment.

Video on the Hall of Fame induction ceremony.

Tazz is in the ring with Colin Delaney, who says he didn’t get hurt at Wrestlemania. Next year though, he wants to be at Wrestlemania as part of the roster. Cue Armando Estrada to offer Delaney a contract….or not as it’s an April Fools joke. Delaney can have a contract, and all he has to do is win this match.

Colin Delaney vs. Big Show

Cobra clutch finishes Delaney in about 45 seconds. The spin when Show sent Delaney flying to let go of the hold was the best part.

We take a long look at Ric Flair retiring at Wrestlemania and the still outstanding farewell from Raw.

Chavo Guerrero/Shelton Benjamin vs. CM Punk/Kane

Punk cranks on Benjamin’s arm to start before handing it off to Kane. The basement dropkick gets two on Benjamin but it’s off to Chavo to kick at the leg. Kane scares Chavo over to Benjamin, who comes back in, only to be launched over the top. We take a break and come back with Kane and Punk taking turns kicking away at Benjamin in the corner.

Chavo comes back in and hits a quick jawbreaker but needs Benjamin to save him from the GTS. We hit the neck crank from Benjamin, followed by the double arm crank from Chavo. Punk finally fights out of the corner and bulldogs his way to freedom. Kane comes back in to start cleaning house, including a big boot to Benjamin. Chavo crotches Kane on top, only to have Punk hit the GTS on Benjamin for the pin.

Rating: C+. This got some time and felt far bigger than anything else on the show, despite not being that important of a match all things considered. Punk is pretty clearly on his way out of ECW, Chavo was destroyed at Wrestlemania and Benjamin is Benjamin. That leaves Kane, the already established monster, as the big deal for ECW and that doesn’t leave much reason to believe Chavo and Benjamin had a chance over fifteen minutes.

Overall Rating: C. The show still isn’t very good and feels miles beneath the two main WWE shows, but just having Kane as the top star, or at least champion, gives it more of a legitimacy. No one was buying Chavo as champion of anything but Kane could be a midcard champion on Raw or Smackdown without a bit of doubt. The rest of the show was nothing, but I can give them a break as everyone is still exhaling after Wrestlemania. If things stay like this next week then there’s a problem, but for a one off, it was ok enough.

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ECW On Sci Fi – March 25, 2008: End This Already

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: March 25, 2008
Location: Crown Coliseum, Fayetteville, North Carolina
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s the final ECW before Wrestlemania and that means pretty much nothing around here. There is no title match set for Wrestlemania as it is going to be all about the battle royal. I’m not sure what that is going to leave us to do on this show but maybe they have one more week of nothing before things, at least hopefully, reset next week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes/Kofi Kingston/Kane/Tommy Dreamer/Jesse & Festus/Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore/Jim Duggan/Val Venis/Jamie Noble vs. Great Khali/Miz/Chuck Palumbo/Matt Striker/Mark Henry/Snitsky/Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch/Brian Kendrick/Deuce N Domino/Elijah Burke

Because THIS is a good idea. This is all twenty four entrants into the battle royal thrown into a tag match, which makes me wonder how many people the aprons can hold. Cody rolls Kendrick up for a fast two and then backslides him for the same. It’s quickly off to Noble vs. Palumbo, with the latter grabbing a belly to back suplex.

Yang comes in off some of that Jung Dragons chemistry but gets suplexed for his efforts. A middle rope hurricanrana gets Yang out of trouble and it’s time for a parade of dives. We take a break and come back with everything breaking down, as you might have expected. Kofi dives onto Deuce N Domino and Holly gets to hit an Alabama Slam. Khali and Kane have finally had enough of this and start wrecking people. With the two of them down, Henry feeds Dreamer into a big boot from Snitsky for the pin.

Rating: C. This is one of those matches that isn’t about the action itself but rather telling you what you might be seeing on Sunday. In that sense it worked out well enough, but my goodness the battle royal might as well have about three people. Chavo almost has to lose at this point as there is just nothing to his title reign and someone else can take the title to hopefully do something with it.

Post match everyone gets in the ring for the huge staredown.

Boxing personalities talk about Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr.

Chavo Guerrero comes up to mock the injured Tommy Dreamer. A match is set for tonight, thanks to some insults to Colin Delaney (sure why not).

Shelton Benjamin vs. Carlito

Feeling out process to start with Carlito slugging away as Taz says he has been hit in the face with a ladder in a match but never had a ladder match. Benjamin skins the cat but Carlito snaps his throat across the top for a crash to the floor. We hit the chinlock back inside and the fans do not seem impressed. Benjamin fights up but gets knocked back into the corner as this isn’t exactly burning up the mat.

Another chinlock goes on but this time Benjamin electric chairs his way to freedom. Carlito is back with a neckbreaker for two and we hit the chinlock with a knee in Benjamin’s back. Benjamin finally makes the comeback and hits the overhead belly to belly. A neckbreaker gives Carlito two more but the Backstabber is countered into a buckle bomb. Paydirt is countered into a backbreaker to give Carlito two more but Benjamin catches him on top. A super Paydirt finishes Carlito off.

Rating: C-. These two were left out there to fill in as much time as they could and it didn’t exactly work. There were far too many chinlocks to get them through the match until Benjamin finally won in the end. This really didn’t work very well, but like everything else around here, none of that is going to matter by next week.

Video on the Raw World Title triple threat match.

Wrestlemania rundown.

The final inductee into the Hall of Fame Class: Gordon Solie.

Kelly Kelly/Stevie Richards vs. Mike Knox/Layla

The women actually wrestle to start with Kelly getting two. Knox gets in a cheap shot from the apron though and Layla takes over for a bit. The men come in and Richards swings away until the women getting in a fight distracts him. Knox grabs a swinging Downward Spiral for the fast pin.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title and the battle royal participants are at ringside. Dreamer backdrops him to the apron and punches him out to the floor to start, with the unofficial lumberjacks sending Chavo back inside. Chavo sends him shoulder first into the post and we hit the front facelock. The fans think Chavo sucks, even as Dreamer fights up with a bulldog. Guerrero blocks something out of the corner so Dreamer settles for a neckbreaker. Dreamer gets crotched on top though and the frog splash gives Chavo the pin.

Rating: C-. And that’s another Chavo match these days, as they are still rather uninteresting with little going on that could make me care about the title. Dreamer making his comeback is always decent enough but there was only so much that can be done with a three minute match less than a week before Wrestlemania. Just get the title off of Chavo already because this reign is dragging down everything else.

Post match everyone gets inside and the fight is on to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. My goodness Wrestlemania needs to come and go already because this show is falling apart in a hurry. There is only so much that can be done when you have one important story and that one is in limbo due to the champion not having an opponent. Other than that, it is a bunch of people trying to fill in time and that is not going to work long, or even short, term.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – March 11, 2008: It’s Been A Bit

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: March 11, 2008
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Attendance: 15,121
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Wrestlemania continues to inch closer and thankfully it seems that Chavo Guerrero can finally move on from CM Punk and find a new challenger for the ECW Title. This week is about the Tag Team Titles though as Tommy Dreamer and Colin Delaney are challenging Miz and John Morrison for the Smackdown Tag Team Titles in an Extreme Rules match. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Miz/John Morrison vs. Tommy Dreamer/Colin Delaney

Miz and Morrison are defending in an Extreme Rules match. Since there are tags in an EXTREME RULES match, Dreamer gets taken into the corner for an early double teaming. Delaney, realizing how rules should really work, dives onto both champs and the fight goes to the floor. A big running flip dive takes Miz and Morrison down as Taz and Cole are way behind Delaney doing nutty things.

Miz manages to knock Dreamer down though and it’s a double gutbuster to Delaney inside. Hold on though as Dreamer slides in a kendo stick and Delaney gets to swing a bit. Dreamer comes back in and the champs are able to get back up with some weapon shots of their own. The catapult into the slingshot elbow crushes Delaney but Dreamer is back with some trashcan lid shots.

With Morrison down, Delaney puts on a Chicago Bears helmet for What’s Up because ECW. Miz is back up with some trashcan lid shots but Dreamer and Delaney tie the champs in the Tree of Woe for running shots to the face. Stereo covers get stereo twos with stereo feet on the ropes, so let’s grab a table.

With that taking too long, Dreamer and Miz go up, with Morrison going over to break it up. That means a superplex to Miz and a superbomb to Morrison for another double delayed near fall. Delaney’s Sliced Bread is broken up with a hard toss out to the floor, allowing Morrison to moonsault off the apron while holding a trashcan. Back in and Miz and Morrison send Dreamer through the table to retain the titles.

Rating: B-. This was WAY better than it had any right to be and it worked out rather well. Delaney and Dreamer were never going to be serious threats to win the titles but they did have some fun on the way there. The helmet spot was fun if nothing else, but this should wrap up the feud for good.

Here is Armando Estrada to announce a 24 man battle royal at Wrestlemania. The winner will get an ECW title match later that night. Estrada brings out one of the participants.

Great Khali vs. Stevie Richards

I’m assuming you can guess which of the two Estrada was excited about. Chokebomb finishes Richards in about 20 seconds.

Post match Mike Knox comes out and wrecks Richards even more. So much for that push.

Deuce vs. Kofi Kingston

Domino and Cherry are here with Deuce. Kofi goes after the arm to start but Deuce snaps the throat across the top rope for a breather. Granted not for Kofi but it’s kind of hard to share one of those. The neck crank goes on but Kofi pops up for the right hands in the corner. The Boom Drop connects and a spinning kick to the face (the Jamaican Buzzsaw according to Joey) finishes Deuce fast.

Rating: C. This is Kingston starting to move up the ladder a bit as Deuce might not be a big star but he is a bigger deal than the other people Kingston has beaten. You can see some potential in him and WWE seems to be moving him in the right way. Nothing special as far as a match goes, but at least he is moving in the right direction.

Raw Rebound.

Wrestlemania rundown.

CM Punk is ready to beat Big Daddy V. and qualify for Money In The Bank. And hey, we’re in his hometown.

Festus vs. Elijah Burke

Jesse is here too. Festus goes off on Burke to start but gets punched back into the corner for his efforts. Burke works on the arm and dropkicks him down for one. Festus shoulders him down, drops a knee, and finishes with the fireman’s carry flapjack. This really wasn’t good and you could see the fans walking out.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Big Daddy V. vs. CM Punk

Shelton Benjamin is on commentary and Matt Striker is here with V. Punk gets shoved down to start so he switches to the leg kicks. V runs him over though as the CM PUNK chants are rather loud here. The slow, plodding offense begins but Punk is back with a running knee in the corner. For some reason, Punk tries the GTS and gets crushed by V landing on his back (a deserved result for being stupid). Back up and Punk knocks him to the floor and that’s a fast countout for the win.

Rating: D+. Yeah what else were you expecting here? There is only so much that anyone can do with V and as a smaller wrestler, Punk is even more limited. Punk winning wasn’t much of a shock here, but what mattered was giving the fans something to cheer about. It was a bad match of course, but they did what they needed to do.

Overall Rating: C. The opener was good but the rest was a mixture of dull and bad. ECW just has nothing going on with Wrestlemania as the title match is going to be set up at the show. What does that leave for the next few weeks as we get to the show? Not a great show here, but at least they set something up going forward.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – March 4, 2008: They Need To Pull Over

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: March 4, 2008
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re still on the Road to Wrestlemania and somehow, again, we’re getting CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero for the latter’s ECW Title. This is setting a new standard for trying to squeeze every last drop out of an idea and there absolutely cannot be much left to wring out of the feud. Maybe tonight can wrap it up for good. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at the last month or so of CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero, because the feud is so long that you can trim it down like that.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: Miz/John Morrison vs. Colin Delaney/Tommy Dreamer

Delaney and Dreamer are challenging after beating the champs in a non-title match last week. Dreamer and Miz start things off with Miz being taken down rather quickly. A Quebecers’ Cannonball hits Miz for two but he’s right back up to drive Delaney into the corner. Morrison comes in for the springboard spinning kick to the head but Delaney manages to kick him away.

The tag brings in Dreamer to a rather nothing reaction and a neckbreaker out of the corner for one on Morrison. The Texas Cloverleaf goes on but Miz makes the save, knocks Delaney to the floor and hammers Dreamer down. That’s too far for Delaney, who grabs a chair and cleans house for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Yeah this wasn’t much to see and that’s because there was no way the titles were going to change here. Delaney and Dreamer are some teacher/student deal and it is getting better over the weeks, but that doesn’t mean they were ready to become champions. Points for making someone new though, which has been lacking around here for a good bit.

Post match Dreamer looks stunned but also rather pleased with the violence. Ignore Delaney costing them the title shot.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Stevie Richards

Benjamin’s original Ain’t No Stopping Me Now music is gone, taking away one of the catchier themes from the era. Richards grabs a headlock to start but Benjamin pulls him out of the air for a shoulder breaker to take over. An armbar and them a figure four arm lock (Tazz’s words) keep Richards in trouble.

Benjamin elbows him in the face and grabs the same arm lock as things grind to another halt. Back up and Benjamin jumps to the top, only to miss a high crossbody. We get some weak SHELTON chants as Richards makes the comeback, including an enziguri for two. That’s too far for Benjamin, who hits the jumping Downward Spiral for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was as interesting as Benjamin working the arm for two minutes out of less than five was going to be. The new Benjamin is just so lame with the gold hair and the weaker music, but at least they’re pushing someone who still has some star power. Also, so much for Richards’ push, but I don’t know what kinds of legs it had in the first place.

Post match Benjamin promises to win Money In The Bank.

We recap the reveal of Maria’s Playboy cover.

Kofi Kingston and Kelly Kelly are admiring the Playboy cover, with Kingston saying she could be a Playboy cover girl. With that kind of creepy line out of the way, Layla comes in to yell at Kelly about Playboy wanting Layla instead. Catfighting ensues, likely over who could be a worse actress.

Kane vs. James Gibson

Before the match, Chuck Palumbo, who is facing Kane on Smackdown, rides to the ring on his motorcycle. Not that it matters as the chokeslam finishes Gibson in about thirty seconds.

Raw Rebound.

CM Punk talks about how Chavo Guerrero claims to be a warrior, but there is one Guerrero who is a warrior and it isn’t Chavo. Punk talks about the things he’s done to Chavo and promises to regain the title tonight.

ECW Title: CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero

Guerrero is defending. Feeling out process to start as Chavo takes him into the corner, only to get rolled up for a fast two. A hammerlock slam sets up an armbar from Punk, which is quickly reversed into a headlock. With that broken up, Punk tries a springboard but gets knocked out to the floor in a pretty nasty crash.

We take a break and come back with Chavo working on the leg, including a chop block to cut him down again. The leg is wrapped around the post and Chavo seems rather confident. We hit the leg crank but Punk manages to use the good leg to kick Chavo outside. Back in and Punk grabs an armbar, only to have Chavo pull him into a half crab. The rope is grabbed so Chavo plants him with a tornado DDT for two instead. Punk catches him going up but gets knocked back down, setting up the frog splash to retain the title.

Rating: C+. They’re done now right? Chavo has beaten Punk multiple times now and this one was completely clean so the feud is over. There is nothing left for these two to do with each other and it is time for both of them to move on. I’m not sure what that will mean for Chavo, but Punk is more than ready to move up to one of the other shows.

Overall Rating: C. This show is in need of a fresh tank of gas as they seem to be running on empty. Miz and Morrison vs. Delaney and Dreamer is the second biggest story on the show and that has the shelf life of some week old bread. Other than that, you have Benjamin minus the fun stuff and Kane warmed up for something on Smackdown. What does that leave for this show? Decent main event this week and nothing else.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – February 26, 2008: Blech Is Never A Good Description

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: February 26, 2008
Location: Convention Center, Tuscon, Arizona
Attendance: 5,200
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re on the way to Wrestlemania and this week isn’t likely to have Ric Flair for a main event. Chavo Guerrero vs. CM Punk should be done for good but you never can tell with that feud. It feels like it could somehow keep going despite being long past its expiration date. If not Punk though, who else is supposed to go after the title? Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Kelly Kelly/Kofi Kingston vs. Santino Marella/Layla

The women start things off as Tazz talks about some 80s song. Actually we’ll switch to the men as Kelly has to bring in “Koko Kingston”. That’s fine with Kofi, who knocks Marella into the corner and hammers away. Back up and Santino gets in a cheap shot to take over and a clothesline allows for some posing.

Layla even gets in some hair pulling from the apron, allowing Santino to work on an armbar. For some reason Santino tags Layla in, which is as good as Kofi tagging Kelly. Some clotheslines drop Layla and Kelly hits a high crossbody for one as everything breaks down. Trouble In Paradise drops Santino and a Fameasser gives Kelly the pin.

Rating: C-. This was as good as Santino doing his lame offense to Kofi for a few minutes before the women came in for the finish was going to be. Santino is a fun character but he doesn’t exactly have the in-ring work to back it up in any way. Kofi continues to feel like someone WWE is protecting and that is a good sign for his future.

Bunnymania is coming at Wrestlemania.

Video on Maria’s Playboy shoot.

Stevie Richards vs. Mike Knox

Knox, ever the villain, goes for the throat to start and a hot shot cuts off a comeback attempt. The slow beating is on and Knox grabs a chinlock to stay on the throat. That’s switched into a choke so the fans start begging for the comeback. Richards comes up with a superkick but the StevieT is blocked. Instead Richards avoids a charge into the corner and now the StevieT is enough to finish Knox off.

Rating: D+. Do you know how fast someone with the limited offense of Knox is going to run out of throat based moves? Richards has a good story, but there is only so much that you can do with it week after week. Yeah he has a bad throat, but if that’s all you’re getting, how far is this supposed to go?

Tommy Dreamer tells Colin Delaney that he as a future as his injuries are starting to heal. Delaney asks if he can have his own theme music when he becomes a star. Dreamer glares at him.

Raw Rebound.

Commentary gets serious about the Vince McMahon/JBL/Hornswoggle/Finlay ordeal.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Tommy Dreamer/Colin Delaney

Non-title. Dreamer armdrags Morrison down to start but Delaney tags himself in (Dreamer: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”) and hits a dropkick. Morrison takes him down without much trouble though and it’s off to Miz to hammer away in the corner. The backbreaker/slingshot elbow combination gives Morrison two and it’s back to Miz for a chinlock. Delaney fights up and Dreamer gets the tag to start the house cleaning. A reverse DDT plants Miz and Morrison is sent outside. Dreamer sends Miz into Delaney and the DDT is good for the pin.

Rating: C-. It might make sense in the story but Dreamer and Delaney just beat the Tag Team Champions completely clean. That’s not the best thing to see and while Miz and Morrison aren’t likely to drop the titles, it feels like a repeat of the Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore feud. Just stop having the champs get pinned.

Video on the Wrestlemania press conference, with the focus on Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr.

Miz and John Morrison are yelling at each other when they’re told Tommy Dreamer and Colin Delaney are getting a Tag Team Title shot next week. They aren’t scared.

CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke vs. Shelton Benjamin

The winner gets an ECW Title shot against Chavo Guerrero, on commentary, next week. The fans are behind Punk as Benjamin kicks Burke to the floor. Chavo: “I would have ducked.” Benjamin knocks Punk down but Burke low bridges him outside to even things up a bit. Back in and Punk grabs a slightly scary flapjack on Burke but Benjamin comes in for the jumping Downward Spiral to drop Punk.

We take a break and come back with Benjamin sunset bombing Punk to the floor but getting dropkicked off the apron by Burke. The Outer Limits elbow gets two on Punk and the running crotch attack to the back of the next hits Benjamin as Burke is the only one left standing. Punk pulls Burke off the top, only to get caught with Benjamin’s dragon whip to cut him down as well. Burke knocks Benjamin out to the floor but Punk is back up with the GTS for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C+. They didn’t hide what they were going to do with the winner here and that isn’t the worst thing. That being said, I’m completely burned out on Punk vs. Chavo, but who else is there to go after the title? ECW is really weak on top faces right now and I don’t think I can see Stevie Richards getting a title shot. That leaves Punk, and that isn’t much to write home about at the moment.

Post match Guerrero gets in the ring for the staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Blech, what a weak show this was, with Kofi vs. Santino being one of the more interesting things going on. You can only get so much with this limited of a roster and no one else to challenge Chavo, so this was more a matter of time than anything else. The main event was fine, but I need more than Punk vs. Chavo 47 or whatever it is to pique my interest.

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – February 19, 2008: They Don’t Need A Guest Star

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: February 19, 2008
Location: Sports Arena, San Diego, California
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re done with No Way Out and on the way to Wrestlemania, which probably won’t mean much for ECW. Chavo Guerrero retained the ECW World Title by defeating CM Punk, again, and that means we need something else on the way to Orlando. I doubt we get that this week, but you have to start somewhere. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Ric Flair to get things going with an in-ring interview with Tazz. After the traditional sucking up, Tazz congratulates Flair on being the first inductee into the 2008 Hall Of Fame class. Flair says it’s an honor, but being the first active wrestler to be inducted may be the ultimate honor. He isn’t going to retire, but he knows that he has to retire after his next loss. That won’t be happening anytime soon though, so WOO!

Cue Elijah Burke to interrupt and say he was a Flair fan growing up. Vince McMahon told him to usher in the new generation and that is what he’s done, so give him four fingers. Cue Shelton Benjamin to interrupt the interrupter and congratulate Flair for always being the Gold Standard. At least he was though, because now Benjamin is in that spot. Flair doesn’t buy their sincerity and says no matter what they do, they’ll never equal sixteen World Titles. The fight is on until CM Punk runs in for the save.

Post break Burke and Benjamin aren’t happy. Armando Alejandro Estrada comes in to make the obvious tag match.

Kofi Kingston vs. Jason Riggs

Riggs’ headlock doesn’t last long as Kingston slips out and armdrags him into an armbar. Back up and Riggs grabs a slam into a chinlock, with Kofi fighting up for the double chop. The double legdrop sets up Trouble In Paradise to give Kofi the fast pin.

Post match Kofi says he’ll keep winning.

We look at Vince McMahon and JBL destroying Hornswoggle in a cage on Raw. Finlay carrying Hornswoggle out was a great visual.

Miz vs. Colin Delaney

John Morrison and Tommy Dreamer are here too. Miz mocks the heavily bandaged Delaney to start and knocks him into the corner for the running clothesline. Delaney gets in a few shots so Morrison offers a distraction. That’s enough to earn himself an ejection and Delaney grabs a rollup for two. Miz isn’t having this and Reality Checks him for the pin.

Post match Dreamer goes after Miz but the villains beat down both Dreamer and Delaney without much trouble.

We look at Maria beating Beth Phoenix to earn the right to be in Playboy.

Kelly Kelly is proud of Maria and would love to be in Playboy someday.

Stevie Richards vs. James Curtis

We get another clip of Stevie’s interview from a few weeks ago and it’s now the third time we’ve heard the same story. Curtis clotheslines him down and Richards grabs his throat. Said throat is gone after with a chinlock but Richards kicks him in the ribs a few times. A running splash in the corner sets up the StevieT to finish Curtis fast.

Raw Rebound.

CM Punk/Ric Flair vs. Shelton Benjamin/Elijah Burke

Punk and Burke get things going as Joey explains that Flair’s career is NOT on the line because this is a tag match. At least that gives us a tiny bit more uncertainty about the winner. A slam drops Burke early and Flair comes in for the chops. Burke gets smart by poking him in the eye and Benjamin comes in, only for Flair to go up top for a DOUBLE SHOT TO THE VILLAINS and we take a break.

Back with Flair avoiding a charge in the corner and doing a Flair Flop into the corner for the tag to Punk (that was cute). House is cleaned but Benjamin shoves off a running bulldog attempt. The villains start working on the ribs, including Benjamin hitting a buckle bomb and almost powerbombing Punk out to the floor (that should have been a bigger deal). Back in and Punk escapes a powerbomb and hits a jumping enziguri, allowing the tag back to Flair. Everything breaks down and Benjamin kicks Flair’s leg out to break up a suplex. The Elijah Express misses though and Flair Figure Fours him for the win.

Rating: C. Completely basic match here with a grand total of almost nothing in the way of doubt about the result. Flair’s next loss is going to be a big deal and it isn’t happening to a pair of pretty midcard names on ECW. It’s nice to have Flair in a nothing match like this for a change though, and it isn’t like Burke losing hurts him in the slightest.

Overall Rating: C-. The show was watchable enough at best and that’s about all the praise I can give it. The biggest problem here is that it felt like a nothing show where they just got in and out without doing anything important. That doesn’t exactly get us onto the Road to Wrestlemania that well but at least they didn’t have anything to that badly. Uninteresting yes, but badly no.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – February 5, 2008: It’s All Wet

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: February 5, 2008
Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re in the Chavo Guerrero era and last week saw a rather obvious mariachi reveal (there’s a weird statement) as CM Punk is still trying to get his title back. Other than that, we have Tommy Dreamer standing up to help the eternally injured Colin Delaney, which could go in a few directions. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is CM Punk to get things going. Punk talks about Chavo Guerrero’s fiesta last week and we see a clip of Mariachi Punk hitting him with a guitar. Back in the arena, Punk says he is invoking his rematch clause right now and wants Chavo out here in this ring. Cue Chavo, who doesn’t think that rematch is happening tonight. Punk can have his rematch, but it’s going to be at No Way Out.

Last week, Punk embarrassed him so tonight, he is embarrassing Punk. We cut to Armando Alejandro Estrada, who is outside the arena, next to the Gulf of Mexico. Tonight, it’s Chavo vs. Punk in the first ever Gulf of Mexico match, where anything goes and you win by throwing your opponent into the Gulf. Well that’s unique.

Victoria/Layla vs. Michelle McCool/Kelly Kelly

Lena Yada is here with Victoria/Layla. Kelly flips out of Layla’s wristlock to start before pretty badly mistiming a handspring elbow in the corner. Michelle comes in for a Hennig necksnap so it’s off to Victoria, who gets forearmed in the face. A shot in the corner slows Michelle down though and Victoria takes out her knee. That doesn’t last long as Michelle gets over to Kelly, who high crossbodies Victoria down. There’s a headscissors to make it worse but as everything breaks down, Lena grabs Kelly’s leg so the Widow’s Peak can give Victoria the pin.

Rating: C-. Kelly is trying to get better but you can only get so far with her timing issues. That can come with work and time but it isn’t there yet. Michelle is getting better as her size and athleticism helps, but you can only get so far wrestling Victoria so many times. Not a terrible match, though keeping the match this short was the only way to go.

We look back at Shelton Benjamin walking out on a match with Kane last week. Their rematch is on Smackdown.

Wrestlemania video, set to the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Weird that this is included here but was missing on Raw.

John Morrison vs. Tommy Dreamer

Miz and Colin Delaney are here too. Dreamer hits a shoulder block to start and armdrags him into an armbar. Back up and Morrison gets in a shot of his own and chokes on the apron to send Dreamer outside. Dreamer has to save the heavily bandaged Delaney, allowing Morrison to get in another shot to take over again.

The chinlock goes on before something close to Miz’s old Mizard of Oz gets two. Morrison misses a corkscrew moonsault though and the comeback is on, including a flapjack to give Dreamer two. There’s the reverse DDT to drop Morrison but Delaney has to cut off an invading Miz. That’s enough of a distraction that Morrison can neckbreaker Dreamer for the pin.

Rating: C. Dreamer is still fine in this role and it isn’t like he is going to be in any major story for the time being. Having him act as Delaney’s protector makes sense and could turn into something down the line. Miz and Morrison need some challengers anyway so let someone be built up for a change.

We get a sitdown interview with Stevie Richards, who talks about his latest throat surgery. His neck was hurt back in 1997 when Terry Funk dropped a barricade on him (and yes we see a clip), which somehow hurt his vocal chords. He has had nine throat surgeries since then but he’ll be back in the ring next week. Richards has been a heck of a surprise in this ECW and I’m glad to see him back.

Kofi Kingston vs. James Curtis

Kofi takes him down into an armbar to start and then twists Curtis down by the wrist. Curtis is back up with his own armbar and works on his own wristlock as the fans do not sound overly interested. Thankfully they pick up the pace a bit with some chops and a jumping elbow dropping Curtis. There’s the jumping double leg and the spinning kick to the face gives Kofi the pin.

Rating: C-. Kofi is one of the more unique looking stars in a good while and it is cool to watch him do his stuff, but spending more than half of the match working on the arms is only going to get you so far. I still wonder if Curtis could have been something, as he had a decent look and could wrestle a competent enough match.

No Way Out rundown.

Chavo Guerrero vs. CM Punk

Non-title Gulf of Mexico match, meaning you win by throwing the other person into the Gulf. They’re both in jeans (and their respective t-shirts of course) to start before the brawl goes outside rather quickly. Chavo knocks him over the barricade and into some chairs but Punk is back with some strikes of his own. Punk gets dropped ribs first onto a wall but fight back and they fight out into the concourse. It’s time to go outside where Punk punches in him the face, earning himself a whip onto the hood of a well timed car.

We take a break and come back with Punk slamming him onto the hood of another car. A backdrop sends Chavo into the windshield but he’s right back with some kicks to the ribs. They go over towards the water, where they scare off some very confused fishermen. Chavo chucks the fishermen’s cooler at Punk but can’t manage to throw him into the Gulf. An attempt at a suplex into the Gulf is blocked and Punk GTS’s him into the water for the win.

Rating: C+. This worked in a weird way, partially due to the lack of commentary when they came back from the break and partially due to letting them have a unique fight. Punk vs. Chavo has been done to death in the ring so let them get out of the ring and mix it up a bit. The next title match is already set up and Punk getting to pose against the night sky after throwing Chavo into the Gulf of Mexico is certainly a way to make things more interesting.

Overall Rating: C. The main event was the best part of the show but it wasn’t enough to carry the rest. There were too many things on here that just weren’t very good and it dragged things down a bit. ECW is still a one to two story show at best and while it is only an hour a week, it isn’t the most interesting hour as the dull parts are really hurting the good pieces.

 

 

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