Clash of the Champions #27
Date: June 23, 1994
Location: North Charleston Coliseum, North Charleston, South Carolina
Attendance: 6,700
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

We finally wrap up this series here. This is the beginning of a new era in WCW as Hogan makes his major debut here tonight. The main event is the unification of the WCW world titles as Sting faces Flair. Other than that there isn’t much else here, but I thought ending with the main event that set up the first Clash was a good idea. Let’s get to it.

The announcers talk about the main event. Sherri is going to be in the corner of one of the two world champions but we’re not sure which.

Tag Titles: Cactus Jack/Kevin Sullivan vs. Nasty Boys

There are two referees for this due to how insane they are. Cactus and Sullivan are champions. This is a Slamboree rematch. Sullivan’s brother Dave is here and has a Hulk Selur shirt on. His gimmick was that he was dyslexic you see. Sags vs. Cactus gets us going and Jerry beats him down. Cactus fights back and the crowd is WAY into this. Everything breaks down about 30 seconds in and the brawl is on. Knobbs gets beaten down and the champs clear the ring.

Knobbs and Sullivan brawl some more. I wouldn’t expect a lot of wrestling in this match whatsoever. It breaks down again and we hear about some kind of conspiracy so Heenan makes Watergate jokes. Sullivan fights them off and slams Cactus off the top into both Nasties. We hear that Hogan is on the way so Heenan goes off on him, saying he better go get Hogan’s bags and all that so Hogan doesn’t have to.

Cactus gets a boot up in the corner and a discus lariat for two. The Nasties double team and get their first advantage over Cactus. Quickly off to Kevin who cleans some house but Sags breaks up the cover. He sends Kevin to the floor and into the barricade and Tony calls Sullivan odd. Heenan: “ODD???” Back to Cactus and a Cactus Clothesline puts him and Knobs on the outside.

Jack gets up on the apron and tries a backwards jump from the bottom rope but the Nasties move and he just crashes. How that man is alive I’ll never know. Back inside there’s some double teaming but Knobs misses a splash and Cactus makes the tag. Brian goes after Dave but Sullivan makes the save. Knobs goes back in and walks into the Double Arm DDT to keep the titles on Sullivan/Jack.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t meant to be anything more than a brawl and that’s all it needed to be. The fans were into it and everything clicked. Then some idiot decided that Jack wasn’t a good choice to be in WCW and that it was Paul Orndorff and Paul Roma that should get two title reigns before the end of the year. And people wonder why they went out of business.

Sting, the WCW International Champion, says he’ll win tonight.

Here’s a video on Big Bossman, now known as the Guardian Angel because WWF didn’t like him being called The Boss. So instead he took the gimmick of a Guardian Angel, which is something like a citizen’s police force in real life New York.

Guardian Angel vs. Tex Slazenger

Tex is Phineas Godwinn. He hits the Angel three times and Bossman counts for the hog farmer’s benefit. That’s enough I guess so Angel hits his usual stuff and the Bossman Slam (called a spike piledriver by that lunkhead Schiavone) ends this in less than two minutes.

Hogan’s motorcade gets here. Heenan makes OJ Simpson jokes because that was the hottest story in the world at that point. It was only six days before this show so the jokes are relevant here. Heenan keeps ranting as only he can do about Hulk. Hogan gets out to a pretty mixed reaction.

TV Title: Steven Regal vs. Larry Zbyszko

Regal said he couldn’t be beaten and laughed at Larry a lot, Larry decked him and won the title on TV. Jesse is on commentary now. Regal comes out in stereotypical British clothes including the powdered wig. Regal pounds him down to start and Larry is in trouble very early. Apparently Sherri is going to pick someone tonight, just not necessarily one of the world champions. Yeah, sure.

Regal, ever the pompous jerk, slaps Larry as he lectures him. Larry, ever the scrapper, gets all fired up and pounds him down as well. They go to the ramp for a bit but back in Regal takes him down. Larry counters a butterfly suplex into a form of a suplex for two. A regular suplex gets two. Piledriver gets two as does a swinging neckbreaker. Regal wants to throw hands and Larry is like uh, cool.

Larry blindsides him and it’s more of a brawl now. Off to a Regal chinlock but Larry reverses into a body scissors. They’re adding in enough brawling and cheating to their mat work to keep things from getting boring. Larry grabs a bearhug of all things before going off to a Boston Crab. Regal’s butler or whatever he is shoves Larry forward and Regal rolls on top, grabs the rope and gets the pin for the title.

Rating: C+. Fun match here and like I said the main thing was that they kept it interesting with the brawling instead of just the mat wrestling, which can get boring after awhile. Good stuff here and it would be Larry’s goodbye match as he didn’t have another major one until Starrcade in 1997. He was 41 when he retired, making him one of the few to get out early and on his own terms, which is always cool.

Gene hypes Bash at the Beach.

After a break, Gene is with Dustin Rhodes who has Arn Anderson with him. Dustin has been having issues with Colonel Parker’s Stud Stable and needs a partner. He picked ARN ANDERSON of all people, and amazingly enough, Anderson would turn on him before their first major match ended. Anderson says he’ll do it but it’ll be the old Anderson. That would be the old Anderson that broke Dustin’s daddy’s leg, but why not trust him right?

US Title: Johnny B. Badd vs. Steve Austin

Austin is champion and has been since December. Badd starts off very fast and chops away in the corner. Off to the arm work by Badd and a dropkick puts Austin on the floor. A top rope clothesline gets two. Off to a front facelock and then the arm again. Austin taps but ECW wasn’t popular yet. He gets a boot up in the corner and takes over. The crowd HATES Austin.

Badd gets fired up and a rollup gets two. And scratch that as the champ takes over again. A running dropkick puts Austin down but Johnny can’t follow up. DDT gets no cover but a SICK sound. He takes too long going up though and Austin crotches him. Badd throws Austin off but misses the top rope sunset flip which gets two for Austin. Another charge, this one by the champ, misses and Badd gets two this time. Things are getting good here. Austin gets an object from somewhere, hits Badd in the ribs and small packages him for the pin. We’ll ignore Badd’s shoulder being up.

Rating: C+. This started badly but got a lot better later on. The first part didn’t work for the most part but after that once they got going with the counters and near falls it got a lot better. The ending didn’t really work but that would get changed post match anyway, not that it really mattered. Fun match though.

Another referee comes out and they find the object. Badd rolls Austin up for a fast three (very fast) from the other referee. We’re told that we’ll hear the decision post commercial but since it’s HOGAN TIME (and yes, Hogan is the bigger deal by far) we’re not told what happened. Badd officially won by DQ.

Hogan gets a decent pop (which would be more impressive if we hadn’t seen Capetta, the ring announcer, firing up the crowd). He IMMEDIATELY brings up bodyslamming Andre and the fans aren’t all that thrilled it wouldn’t seem. When asked about the unification match, he wants a shot at the winner.

Flair pops up on the screen (drawing a pop as strong as Hogan’s if not bigger) and says he’ll win. This would be the beginning of Looney Flair.

Shaq in Hogan gear and with Hogan says Hogan is awesome. Ok then.

WCW World Title/WCW International World Title: Ric Flair vs. Sting

Flair: bigger pop than Hogan. Sting: WAY bigger pop than Hogan. Ok quick history lesson on the title issue here: as you know the NWA World Title is the famous one. Well eventually WCW had it’s own title. The NWA was incapable of being told that no one cared about them anymore, so they insisted there were two titles. Then the whole Flair walks thing happened so there were two titles for awhile.

WCW realized what everyone knew for years, which is that they didn’t need the NWA, so they dropped out. Flair officially owned the belt though, so there were two belts. The International Committee was a parody of the NWA Board. This match is a unification match and the way to finally get rid of whatever is left of the NWA in WCW. The big gold belt is the International Title here and would be the official title. Sting holds that one right now.

Sherri comes out before the match starts. She has the same face paint on that Sting has. Flair charges at Sting but the power stops him every time. Sting keeps nipping up and Flair backs off. Sting poses and Flair runs to the ramp. Back in and Flair still can’t get anything going and we get a Flair Flop on the floor. He yells at the fans as Heenan is freaking out. They keep pushing that this is a unification, which it really isn’t. The belt had been unified for years earlier but, say it with me, THE NWA IS STUPID, so they made something out of nothing here.

Flair pokes him in the eyes but tries chopping because that always works on Sting, resulting in Flair taking a bunch of clotheslines. The chops still don’t work so Flair goes for the knee, only to get rolled up for two. Flair takes another walk and Heenan’s freaking is getting hilarious. The idea is Hogan is driving Flair crazy and he’s off his game tonight.

Sting finally misses a splash in the corner and Flair is able to take over. Flair takes it to the floor quickly due to his old standard of asking the referee about the time. Flair covers with his feet on the ropes because that’s what heels do. No seriously, heels are supposed to cheat. Why don’t they do that more often? Sleeper goes on and Sting is in trouble. Sting manages to ram him into the buckle and there’s the Flair Flop.

Sting busts out the Slingshot and we get a second Flair Flop. Oh wait third. I forgot the one on the floor. Sherri cheers Sting on and he gets a suplex for a delayed two. Flair does the Flip and run the apron into a clothesline deal in the corner. Top rope superplex for Sting and he pops up and heads to the top. The big splash misses though and both guys are in trouble.

Sting no sells a regular suplex and Flair panics. He sends Flair to the floor and sets for a dive but Flair pulls Sherri in front and Sting crushes her. Back in and Sting puts Flair down again, but as he goes to check on Sherri, Slick Ric rolls him up and grabs the tights (again, that’s what heels do) and unifies the titles.

Rating: B+. Again, Sting and Flair are one of those pairings that automatically start higher than most. These two are seemingly incapable of having a bad match and they had another great one here. And then that didn’t mean anything for Sting as he went from world champion one month to being Hogan’s lackey for the next year. Flair turned into a raving lunatic and was “retired” for about six months starting in October. But hey, we got that Brutus Beefcake main event push. Who would want to see the planned Steve Austin world title reign anyway right?

Sherri gets in the ring and hugs Flair, because it was a swerve. See, THIS IS HOW A SWERVE WORKS. Sherri sacrificed herself, but the distraction from that sacrifice let Flair win the title. THAT IS HOW YOU DO A SWERVE!!! She and Flair beat down Sting post match until Hogan comes in for the save.

Hogan basically says he’s getting a title shot to close the show.

Overall Rating: B-. And with that, it ends. Not just the Clashes, but WCW’s chance to beat the WWF on their own. I’d have loved to see what they could have done without Hogan coming in. They had Austin ready to go as the top heel in the company, they had Foley mastering what would become the Attitude Era main event style, they had Steamboat around still, they had Sting to be the top face, they had an incredibly popular Flair (turned heel to avoid outpopping Hogan), they had guys like Regal, Badd and Pillman who could do whatever…and then Hogan came in.

He cleaned out the young talent or stuck them in endless midcard feuds, he ran Austin off, he made Foley into nothing (so Foley wisely bailed) and the whole place fell apart over the course of 1995 as it was ALL about Hogan. Savage came in at Starrcade 94 and was Hogan’s lackey. Nothing meant anything other than Hogan and had it not been for the Outsiders, I’m very curious as to where it would have gone. Anyway, good show and i’ve have loved to see where they could have taken things.

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Clash of the Champions #20
Date: September 2, 1992
Location: Center Stage Theater, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jesse Ventura

This is the next to last one that I have to go and it’s a theme show. This is a show dedicated to WCW being on the Superstation for 20 years. Yeah you know that whole “longest running weekly episodic show?” It’s not even close. WCW/all it’s other names was on the air on Saturday Nights at 6:05 for roughly 28 years straight. Raw hasn’t even hit 19 years yet. Even when Vince took over for a few months in the mid 80s, it was still called World Championship Wrestling. Anyway let’s get to it.

The show opens with an old clip of Andre the Giant from probably the 70s. He has an interview tonight, which was his final American appearance.

The opening video is in the form of a scrapbook with various people that used to be big stars. This is always cool to see.

Tony and Missy are outside like they’re at a red carpet. Gordon Solie is here too and hello Andre in Princess Bride attire. Ron Simmons, the world champion, arrives. Now Bill Watts gets here. He’s followed by….HANK AARON??? I know he’s around every now and then but it’s still cool to see him. Bill Shaw, the legit president of WCW (who had no idea how wrestling worked) is here too. Jim Barnett, a promoter, is here, as is Bob Dhue (another legit boss) and BRUNO SAMMARTINO!!! He kind of bashes WWF by saying that he’s glad to be in a real wrestling company. Sting arrives on a motorcycle.

We go inside now and Robb Pitts, an Atlanta City Councilman, gives Bill Watts a proclamation. The Assassin in his mask in the background is an amusing sight. Dusty pops up and says some catchphrases. Assassin, Thunderbolt Patterson and Magnum TA are here too.

TV Title: Ricky Steamboat vs. Steve Austin

Austin is champion. This is the leftovers of the Dangerous Alliance angle which should have gone on at least another year but hey, it’s WCW so why let things go well? Austin is mentioned as a member of it here but I’d have thought it was long gone by then. The national anthem is sung after their entrances. It’s done by an 11 year old and Johnny B. Badd. That’s an odd combination. Oh ok he’s just walking her there.

This is no DQ, which means moves off the top are allowed. Also, Dangerously will be in a cage outside the ring. Steamboat also has bad ribs. Austin goes right for them but it’s mainly striking to get us going. Ricky grabs a headlock to take over and they go to the mat. The cage is now up in the air. Also you can vote on whether or not the top rope moves should be banned or not.

Still in the headlock and Austin taps but it doesn’t mean anything yet. Austin escapes and goes right for the ribs with a hiptoss and elbow drop. See how easy it is? Back to the headlock by Ricky as they’re kind of filling time here. They go to the corner and Austin steps onto the bottom rope with Steamboat on the middle rope, kind of like for a really low level belly to belly superplex. However, instead of that he throws Steamboat forward over his head so that Steamboat lands face first and ribs first on the mat. Cool move.

Steamboat can’t do much now due to the ribs so Austin locks on an abdominal stretch. Ricky starts his comeback and a middle rope cross body gets two. Austin takes a slingshot into the buckle for two. A tombstone gets two and the crowd is getting way into this. Austin gets two on a rollup with tights. Ricky blocks a superplex but jumps into a punch to the ribs. Shoulder block gets two for Ricky. He skins the cat but a BIG elbow sends him to the floor. In a sweet move, Steamboat slips under the ring and comes out the other side for the top rope cross body for the pin and the title.

Rating: B-. I liked this one a lot and they got the crowd into this. When a crowd of 500 people can be heard that clearly you can tell you’ve got something good going. It helps when you have this kind of talent out there. This would be a bigger feud in the next few years and over a bigger title as well, which is the idea. Then Steamboat got injured and someone decided that Austin wasn’t marketable. Idiots.

Here are some clips from the old days, in this case from Mr. Wrestling #2.

We get a video on some of the great tag teams that have competed here on TBS. We see stuff from the Assassins, the Briscoes, the Freebirds (probably from the 70s), the Road Warriors and the Rock N Roll Express. These are just like 20 second clips so there isn’t anything to say here. Roddy Piper is on commentary in the Warriors clips and sounds BOMBED.

Video on Halloween Havoc 1992.

Michael Hayes tells Terry Gordy (not seen) that his men Arn Anderson/Bobby Eaton (seen) will kill him.

Arn Anderson/Bobby Eaton vs. Dick Slater/Greg Valentine

Arn and Valentine start us off. Slater and Valentine clear the ring and it breaks down very quickly. We get to Slater and Eaton with Slater in control. A Russian legsweep and feet on the ropes get two. This is heel vs. heel. Off to Anderson who gets caught in the corner and double teamed. This isn’t really working and I have no idea why they’re going heel vs. heel here. Slater works on Arn’s leg and Valentine hooks a Figure Four which Eaton breaks up. Spinebuster gets two on Greg and it breaks down again. Larry Zbyszko comes out and hits Greg with a cast by mistake and a middle rope Alabama Jam ends this.

Rating: D+. What an odd match. Having four heels (and good ones at that) out there made this into an “I can out heel you” contest which isn’t something I recall seeing. The problem is you’re not going to get anyone cheered out there and I really don’t get the point of it. Just an odd choice.

Bruno Sammartino has an interview and flat out says that he’s glad to be back in a real wrestling organization, unlike that other place he’s been with for the last ten years.

Teddy Long is in the VIP Room and instead of talking to Gordon Solie or Andre, he picks Bob Armstrong. They just didn’t get it at times. Now let’s talk to Thunderbolt Patterson. Dude, ANDRE THE GIANT IS SITTING NEXT TO YOU. Patterson actually says he’s glad to be alive to be here.

We get a quick statement from Mr. Wrestling #2 from Hawaii.

Ted Turner thanks us for 20 years. You have to give him this: he stuck with them as long as he could.

Bill Watts vacates the Light Heavyweight Title due to champion Brad Armstrong being injured. A tournament is promised but it never came. We go to Brad on a crutch who says he’s disappointed because he has to step down. He thinks he’s a failure and Brian Pillman, the opponent for later, comes out. He says it’s a disgrace because he’s supposed to get the title back but Armstrong is claiming an injury. Armstrong’s dad should be ashamed of him and Brad doesn’t know what to say. Pillman slaps him, officially turning heel.

Here’s a singles version of the same kind of montage we saw earlier for the tag teams. Way too many to name here but if they’re a big name they’re here. There are a lot of smaller named guys too. It sounds like it’s set to the Sting music when he came out at Starrcade 97.

Video on Ron Simmons, the WCW World Champion.

WCW World Title: Cactus Jack vs. Ron Simmons

Dig that old Doom music! Ole Anderson is referee here for no apparent reason. This is power vs. brawling of course so Ron tries to wear Jack down. Jack actually speeds things up and hits a flying headbutt to take over. Out to the floor and Ron is like yeah go ahead and jump. Back in and Cactus takes over using his evil ways. Simmons pounds him down in the corner but he charges into a punch.

Cactus Clothesline and they go to the floor. Swinging neckbreaker out there puts Simmons down and they go back in. Three clotheslines get a two count for Jack and it’s off to the chinlock. They trade headbutts and down goes Jack. Two three point shoulder blocks take Jack down again. Back to the floor and Cactus manages to drop his apron elbow to the floor which is one of his major moves. And Simmons is up again in like 4 seconds. Back in the ring, Simmons hits the spinebuster and powerslam to retain. Literally after the elbow, Jack had zero offense and the match was over 20 seconds later.

Rating: D+. I don’t get that ending at all. This was a pretty major feud for awhile, including Jack managing I believe Barbarian for the world title match at Starrcade. The rest of that match wasn’t anything of note either as Ron was pretty much like “yeah keep hitting me.” Really strange match, which is kind of a theme for the last two of them.

Masahiro Chono won a tournament in Japan to win the NWA World Title over Rick Rude. This would result in Chono and Muta getting time on WCW TV, because the NWA thought people cared. We get some clips of the match which looks pretty good.

Rude issues a challenge to Chono for a rematch.

Cactus Jack says he’s in pain but he has someone to help Barbarian and this someone knows Simmons very well. It’s Butch Reed.

Butch Reed/Barbarian vs. Dustin Rhodes/Barry Windham

Jack is on commentary here. Barbarian starts with Rhodes. The Texans cheat and fire off a bunch of double dropkicks to clear the ring. Barbarian is an interesting guy as he always had jobs. Think about it: he was around in the mid 80s, then got a pretty long run in WWF then this quick WCW run then he went back to WWF for a few months then was in WCW for the Faces of Fear. That’s pretty impressive for someone that was never anything more than a lower midcard guy.

Reed gets pounded on in the corner but Dustin misses a charge and falls to the corner. Cactus’ evil laugh is downright CREEPY. The monsters lure Windham in and double team Dustin some more. Cactus: “You can fool some of the people some of the time but you can fool Barry Windham all of the time.” It’s funnier when he says it. A clothesline puts Rhodes down and Reed pounds away on him.

Off to Barbarian who beats on Dustin even more. Standard tag team formula here and that’s perfectly fine. It still works so why mess with it? Reed comes in for a reverse chinlock as Jack says he’s playing a part in a plan but won’t elaborate on it. I don’t think that ever went anywhere. Dustin manages to get a clothesline but takes one of his own. There’s the double tag Windham comes in and speeds things up. He hits the superplex on Barbarian but goes to stop Reed instead. Everything breaks down and Barbarian kicks Barry’s head off for the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine. Barry and Dustin would go on to win the tag titles (the WCW versions, not the NWA titles, meaning that the team they beat still had tag titles because the NWA is stupid) in about a month. Barbarian and Reed would help Jack against Simmons then just kind of fade away.

Jack tells Simmons to be ready.

Here’s a video on the main event. It’s a Survivor Series style match with Sting captaining the Steiners/Nikita Koloff vs. Vader/Jake Roberts/Rude/Super Invader. Sting and Vader are obvious, Jake came in to feud with Sting as a HUGE signing that went nowhere. Koloff is feuding with Rude over the US Title, and the Steiners are Sting’s friends. Super Invader is Hercules of all people under a mask. He’s Harley Race’s goon so there are your eight men.

Sting/Nikita Koloff/Steiner Brothers vs. Rick Rude/Super Invader/Jake Roberts/Big Van Vader

Remember, elimination rules. Hercules is HUGE here as he must be on the good steroids. Rick vs. Vader gets us going. Vader pounds him down as only he can but walks into a SWEET belly to belly. Off to Koloff vs. Invader now. Invadercules takes him down and it’s off to Rude for our first rivalry pairing. Scott comes in as does Invader. No one has really stayed in long enough to get anything going other than the opening pairing.

Scott calls for the Frankensteiner but Rude makes a blind tag and takes Scott down before the Frankensteiner can hit. Roberts comes in to do nothing so it’s off to Vader who pounds Scott down in the corner. He whips Scott in and Jake isn’t paying attention so he gets knocked to the floor. Scott grabs a tilt-a-whirl on Rude, setting up double tags to Roberts and Koloff.

Nikita beats up everyone but Rude knees him in the back, allowing Jake to roll him up for a 4-3 advantage. Off to Sting vs. Invader and that kind of bulldog move that Sting does ties it up. Vader comes in to fight Sting but Sting tags out to Rick. There’s a BIG suplex to Vader. I could watch the Steiners throw people around all day. Rick goes up but jumps into a powerslam. That’s scary power. Vader just held him for awhile because he could. A middle rope splash only gets two. The crowd is way into this.

Off to Rude who puts on a front facelock. Rick powers to the corner but Jake came in for a distraction so the tag doesn’t count. Back to Vader who jumps off the rope but also gets caught in a powerslam by Rick. The Steiners try a Doomsday Device but Rick can’t hold him so it’s more like a regular top rope clothesline. But wait, since Bill Watts is REALLY FREAKING STUPID, that means Scott is disqualified.

Rick and Vader go to the floor and Rick backdrops him out there. Rick Rude comes over and hits the Rude Awakening on Steiner and only Vader beats the count back in. That makes it Sting vs. Roberts/Rude/Vader. He gets Roberts first and there’s the Splash but Rude breaks up the Deathlock attempt. Sting does what he can but he’s still against three guys. The bulldog gets two on Rude. He hits a slingshot suplex but Vader comes off the top with a splash on both guys for no apparent reason, drawing his own DQ. Jake pulls Rude over for a tag and Jake easily DDTs Sting for the winning pin.

Rating: D+. Bill Watts is really stupid. The problem with the top rope thing is it completely takes away the excitement that you can get from things like that. Watts wanted an old school, mat based style which is why he pushed the Miracle Violence Connection so hard. The problem with that is NO ONE ELSE LIKES IT. But who cares about something like that right? I mean, it’s TRADITION AND THE NWA BABY!!! The match was nothing special and was pretty dull due to the people being eliminated through such stupid means.

We hear the results of the poll about the top rope being reinstated: 88% want moves off the top to be legal again. Think that happened? Of course not.

JR says we’ll take a special look at Halloween Havoc, but it’s the same commercial we’ve seen three times already. Oh wait this has some extra stuff in it. Well at least it’s different. This announces that it’ll be Jake vs. Sting in Spin the Wheel, Make the Deal, which is WCW’s version of Raw Roulette. Naturally they didn’t rig the wheel so they got a Coal Miner’s Glove match, which was AWFUL. The announcement is in the form of a REALLY badly acted skit in I think a bar or something where Jake challenges him.

Overall Rating: D+. This was a weird show. The set looking exactly the same as WCW Saturday Night (it was on the same set) gave this a really weird dynamic. It’s not bad or anything but it felt more like a special edition of Saturday Night rather than a big time show. It did some setting up of Havoc but not much really. Oh and before I forget: Scott Steiner would win the TV Title shortly after this and would tease turning heel, but the Steiners would be in the WWF before Christmas.

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Clash of the Champions #13: Thanksgiving Thunder
Date: November 20, 1990
Location: Jacksonville Memorial Coliseum, Jacksonville, Florida
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul E. Dangerously

We’re in a very dark era for WCW at this point as it’s the final days of the Black Scorpion story. This show is probably the lowest point that it reached for reasons that you’ll see. Basically, there’s some guy in a black suit running around taunting Sting and no one knows who he is. There have been a lot of false alarms and hints which tried to imply it was Ultimate Warrior, but you would have to be a BIG old school fan to get that. Anyway it sucks but let’s get to it.

After a very basic intro which is pretty downplayed by comparison to most of their videos.

JR and Paulie talk about the show. The main event is Flair vs. Butch Reed. If Reed wins, Teddy Long gets Flair’s yacht and limo but if Flair wins, the Horsemen get a tag title shot and Teddy has to be Flair’s chauffeur.

Freebirds/Bobby Eaton vs. Southern Boys/El Gigante

The Birds have an annoying manager named Little Richard Marley (jobber Rocky King) with them. And never mind as Hayes says El Gigante got beaten up and sent back to Argentina so it’s just going to be a tag match.

Freebirds vs. Southern Boys

Eaton gets thrown out. Garvin vs. Smothers starts us off. This is a two and a half hour show (TV time that is) and we have 11 matches so most of them are going to be short. The Southern Boys clean house and send the Birds to the floor. The lighting is TERRIBLE in the arena here. Hayes isn’t really the kind of guy that can make glittery purple pants look tough.

The Birds get knocked to the floor again and we eventually get to Garvin vs. Tracy Smothers (his partner is Steve Armstrong). Garvin gets slammed off the top and the Birds double team. So then Armstrong goes one up on them with a double clothesline off the top. Marley gets up on the apron as the Southern Boys take over. Marley trips Smothers as Armstrong dives onto Garvin, allowing Hayes to DDT Smothers for the cheap pin.

Rating: D-. Well that match was worthless. I never cared for either of these teams and this was a pretty good example as to why. Who in the world thought this was going to be an entertaining match? Nothing interesting here at all and the Birds might have used three moves other than a slam. Terribly uninteresting.

Here’s Sting who is fired up to be face to face with the Black Scorpion. And that’s it. This was like 30 seconds long. Oh wait we’re not done. The Black Scorpion’s voice comes over the PA (it’s Ole Anderson, the same voice as the Shockmaster) who says that we’ll see his great powers of black magic tonight.

Buddy Landell vs. Brian Pillman

Pillman has the Bengals trunks now and is way popular. Landell looks exactly like Flair and even is nicknamed Nature Boy. He jumps Pillman to start and beats him down. Brian tries for some quick pins but once they don’t work he just knocks Buddy to the floor and dives onto him onto the ramp. A piledriver out there doesn’t work and back into the ring they go. They fight to the floor and Landell sends him to the post.

Even Dangerously says that Landell is a Flair clone. I’m not sure I get the point in having a Flair character at the same time Flair was there but he had been doing it for years so it’s not like this is some quick character for him. He was popular enough on his own too. Out to the floor again and Pillman hits a SWEET springboard crossbody to send Landell into the railing. Dang that man could fly. Abdominal stretch by Buddy is followed by a backbreaker for two. Pillman blocks a superplex and hits a top rope cross body for a very quick pin.

Rating: C. This was again short but they had a decent little match out there. Pillman was a rising star and would be in WarGames the next year (almost getting killed in the process but that’s another review for another time). This was a very basic power/brawler vs. speed match but it worked out pretty well I thought.

Big Cat vs. Brad Armstrong

Cat is more famous as Curtis Hughes and is one of three monster heels in a loose stable at this point. He wanted Luger and I don’t remember them ever fighting. Armstrong is the Candyman here because he’s only had 9485 stupid gimmicks in his career and needed another. What exactly that name means isn’t exactly mentioned but who needs to know that?

Power vs. speed here. Basically picture Big Zeke for an image of Big Cat. As for what happens in this, picture any power monster vs. speed face match that you’ve ever seen and you have that here. Cat hits a trio of backbreakers and Armstrong is in trouble. There’s a bearhug to continue the predictable basis of this one. Armstrong makes a very quick comeback but gets caught in a Torture Rack (stolen from Luger to further the feud) and the referee stops it.

Rating: D. Like I said, this was every power vs. speed match you’ve ever seen. Paint by numbers would be a good name for this. It’s not horrible I guess, but I’ve seen this sort of thing so many times that there’s nothing to be gained from it. It did its job well enough though so it’s not a total waste of time.

Dick the Bruiser is a scary man and says he’ll be at Starrcade to referee the main event.

Z-Man vs. Brian Lee

Lee is more famous as either a guy in ECW, the Fake Undertaker in 1994 or Chainz in the early Attitude Era. More speed vs. big guy here but Lee isn’t quite a full power guy. He’s more tall than strong. Z-Man speeds things up but misses a cross body and crashes to let Lee take over. Off to a chinlock as this is going nowhere. Z-Man easily comes back and a missile dropkick ends this.

Rating: F. This show SUCKS. This was another match that did nothing at all and was just there which is getting really old really fast. Lee was awful and from what I can find this is his official tryout match. To the shock of no one, he didn’t get a job out of it. Nothing match and it didn’t work at all.

Mike Rotundo is officially Michael Wallstreet after inheriting a lot of money. He’s got a new manager in the form of Alexandra York who says the computer says if Wallstreet follows the plan, he’ll beat Starblazer with ease tonight. This angle lasted longer than it should have but almost got good near the end.

Starblazer vs. Michael Wallstreet

Apparently Starblazer is (mostly) career jobber Tim Horner under a mask. How can we possibly be five matches into this show? York (Terri Runnels) shows him the computer’s plan and the fans chant boring less than a minute into this. Starblazer hits some fast dropkicks to send him to the floor. Join the WCW Fan Club! Back in they speed things up and Wallstreet throws him to the floor. Blazer makes a brief comeback and they fight over a Boston Crab for some reason. This FINALLY ends with the Wallstreet Crash, a Samoan Drop, for the pin.

Rating: D-. I have never seen a crowd that dead for a match. I mean they were not moving in the slightest. Wallstreet was such a boring character and they didn’t really ever develop him at all. He was at least better as IRS due to the character having something to talk about. Still though, bad match.

The WCW Top Ten:

Tag teams first.

10. Norman The Lunatic/The Juicer
9. Big Cat/Motor City Madman
8. Tim Horner/Candyman
7. Master Blasters
6. Southern Boys
5. Ricky Morton/Tommy Rich
4. Freebirds
3. Nasty Boys
2. Ric Flair/Arn Anderson
1. Steiner Brothers

Singles:

10. Bobby Eaton
9. Z-Man
8. Michael Wallstreet
7. Brian Pillman
6. Terry Taylor
5. Arn Anderson
4. Ric Flair
3. Lex Luger
2. Sid Vicious
1. Stan Hansen

Here’s a video about the International Tag Team Tournament which had one team from a bunch of countries/continents.

Ready for something that’s bordering on full blown racism?

African Tag Team Tournament Finals: Colonel DeKlerk/Sergeant Krueger vs. Kalua/Botswana Beast

DeKlerk is Rocco Rock before he gained a ton of work. I have no idea who Beast and Kalua are and I can’t find any information on them at all. Probably local guys. Naturally the “Africans” (yeah they’re just from Africa, even if one is named Botswana Beast) are black and the white South Africans are pretty American, as Krueger is Matt Osborne, as in Doink the Clown/Big Josh.

Krueger starts with let’s say Kalua. At least the Africans (as in not the white South Africans) are in regular tights and not tribal attire. Dangerously talks about how great DeKlerk is and all the titles he’s held on different continents. DeKlerk busts out a standing Lionsault but lands almost in a reverse DDT. Beast is a huge man and no sells a lot while his gut shakes. Beast destroys DeKlerk but gets caught with a clothesline. Another powerslam puts DeKlerk down for two. Things break down and they do the slam with a dropkick to the back for the pin as DeKlerk pins Beast.

Rating: F. It was stupid, they’re not from Africa, and I feel like I need to report this to Jesse Jackson. Just dreadful and the match SUCKED on top of that.

Sam Muchnick invites us to watch Starrcade in St. Louis. Old school fans will smile at that.

Recap of Luger vs. Hansen for the US Title, which is about Hansen FINALLY ending the title reign of Luger went on over 19 months. He did it clean too.

Vignette of Paul E. and his Motorcity Madman, another of that trio of heels I mentioned earlier.

Luger isn’t worried about the Madman. He wants Hansen but Big Cat shows up. Luger punches him once, Cat goes down, Luger goes to the ring. Cat gets up and says that was a mistake. Luger looked AWESOME there.

Motorcity Madman vs. Lex Luger

Madman is a nobody who got a cup of coffee in WCW and nothing happened with him. Lex is just ungodly popular. Big Cat sneaks up on Lex and they slug it out. Cat gets beaten back until referees break it up. The Madman jumps Luger as literally the entire two front rows are walking out at the exact same time. They must have been from somewhere else in the arena because the rows are full. There must have been 30-40 people walking though. Lex mostly suplexes the big guy as this is really just a power display for Lex. Madman hits a forearm and side slam but Lex hits a clothesline for the quick pin. Just a squash.

Nick Patrick speaks for the referees and says they’re worried about the Steiners vs. the Nasties. Ok then.

Renegade Warriors vs. Nasty Boys

They’re Chris and Mark Youngblood, a regular tag team who are Indians. JR says if the Nasties can beat the Steiners, he’ll quit announcing. Paulie FREAKS and is now Nasty Fan #1. Mark starts with Sags. It quickly turns into a brawl with Knobs taking over. Chris helps cheat which sets up an armbar. Back to Mark and now it’s Sags getting his arm worked on. Out to the floor and Knobs sends Mark into the railing. Chris bangs on a tom tom drum so Knobs DDTs Mark’s arm. Really bad match so far. The Steiners FINALLY run in and beat down the Nasties, probably as punishment for this. It’s a double DQ.

Rating: F. Oh just AWFUL here. The only thing people wanted to see was a brawl between the Nasties and Steiners, but somehow the WWF was able to get the Nasties over to WWF very quickly after this. I mean this is November and the Nasties were at the Rumble in January. I’ve never gotten how that can be done but it happened in this case.

Vader is back.

Sid Vicious vs. Nightstalker

Nightstalker is Brian Clark, or Adam Bomb. I remember seeing Nightstalker coming down the aisle and that exact camera angle watching this as a kid. I love stuff like that. Sid is a Horseman and very popular here. Test of strength to start which is won by Sid but Stalker hooks a bearhug. He talks to Sid the whole time. Clearly they’re exchanging green bean casserole recipies.

Sid pounds him into the corner and JR says this won’t be pretty. Sid’s arm is hurt and this is going nowhere. We get a rib claw and here’s Big Cat AGAIN. What is this, his 4th appearance? Sid knocks him down so Stalker brings in his ax. Yes, an ax. Sid gets it, hits Stalker with it, and gets the pin.

Rating: F. GET RID OF BIG CAT. He’s nothing interesting, he’s more boring than Big Zeke Jackson, and he’s been in half the matches tonight. Nothing to see here and a horribly bad match. Also, there’s the fact that SID HIT HIM WITH AN AX TO END THE THING. Let that sink in for a minute.

The Freebirds pat themselves on the back until the Southern Boys come up. Garvin offers to fights with an arm behind his back and here’s El Gigante to chase them off.

Missy Hyatt hypes an upcoming TV show.

We look at the Steiners attacking the Nasties earlier.

Steiner Brothers vs. Magnum Force

I can’t find who Magnum Force is anywhere. They’re one of those old school teams referred to as Magnum Force #1 and Magnum Force #2. The Steiners are the US Tag Champions but this is non-title. Scott starts with let’s say #1. The people are walking AGAIN. There has to be something to that. Rick vs. #2 in now. This is going nowhere. A quick Steiner Line ends this and the Nasties run in. Total squash and the Nasties run quickly.

The Horsemen say they’ll win. The official main event hasn’t been announced yet but it’s Flair or Arn vs. Reed or Simmons.

We recap Sting vs. Black Scorpion. The idea is that it’s someone from Sting’s past (eventually supposed to be Angel of Death, who no one was going to remember) and he’s trying to take Sting out. Sting beat a fake one at a previous Clash but the real one came down later. Then in Chicago, the Scorpion kidnapped a fan, put him in a magician’s box, and made him disappear. Then the Scorpion interrupted a title match. Tonight, they’re going to have a chat.

Sting comes out for the Danger Zone, Paulie’s talk show. He says a little bit and here’s the Scorpion to kidnap another fan. The “fan” gets a box put on his head and his “head” is spun around 360 degrees. Then he gets put in a cage and turned into a leopard. And remember, This was supposed to be the TOP HEEL ANGLE OF THE YEAR. Scorpion jumps into a box and disappears. He was narrating the thing the whole time but you couldn’t understand 90% of it.

I mean WOW. This is a fine example of what we mean by “insulting our intelligence.” This was a bad magic show, not a wrestling match. At the end of the day it wound up being Flair under the mask, which makes the whole thing even dumber. I have no idea what Ole Anderson was on when he thought this was a good idea, but man I want some of it.

We recap Doom vs. The Horsemen. They both wanted to be on The Danger Zone and it all broke down. They had a match at Halloween Havoc where it was thrown out. The aforementioned bet was made: yacht/limo vs. title shot/Teddy as a chauffeur.

All four guys come out and there are coin flips to determine who the singles guys are.

Ric Flair vs. Butch Reed

Power vs. Flair here and you know he knows how to work that match. Reed uses power and punches him out a lot. There’s the press slam and Flair is in trouble early. After a brief fight on the ramp we go back inside and Reed hooks a backslide for two. A dropkick puts Flair down but he goes to the eyes like a Horseman. He tosses Reed to the floor thanks to an accidental distraction from Simmons.

Anderson adds in some cheating on the floor but back inside they trade chops and Reed gets a slight advantage. There’s a Flair Flop and a Flair Flip, resulting in him getting popped in the face by Simmons. Flair takes over and hits a knee drop but a second one misses. Reed slaps on a figure four and Flair’s leg is in trouble.

After Flair makes the rope he avoids a middle rope elbow and Reed is in trouble. It turns into a slugout and they need to wrap this up. Reed really likes gorilla presses. He goes up top for a shoulder block but it basically hits Flair’s knee. I don’t think he was aiming for it but there you go. Reed gets sent to the floor where the referee was and everyone is down. Anderson clocks Reed with a chair and Flair steals the pin.

Rating: C-. Pretty good match but the last five minutes weigh it down a bit. The ending is a big mess but the idea was that Simmons got lost in it and therefore couldn’t make a save. It’s certainly not bad and is easily the best match of the night, but to be fair given what you had up to that point, that shouldn’t surprise anyone. Decent stuff, but cutting four minutes or so off would have made it way better.

The big WCW letters are tilted to the left for some reason.

Overall Rating: D-. This is the worst kind of show: the boring kind. Other than the main event which is just ok, there’s nothing going on here worth seeing. That’s what I can’t stand reviewing: shows where it’s clear no one is giving any effort and no one wants to be there. It was a horribly dull show with nothing at all to see. Steer FAR clear of this one.

Clash of the Champions #8: Fall Brawl 1989
Date: September 12, 1989
Location: Carolina Coliseum, Columbia, South Carolina
Attendance: 2,600
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jim Cornette

We’re in 89 here and since it’s anywhere between late summer and early winter, it’s Fall Brawl. This has nothing to do with the regular PPV because there were about 5 other shows with that name. Anyway, the main event here is supposed to be Flair/Sting vs. Funk/Muta. Funk is hurt via Flair though so it’s…Dick Slater? This is one of those transitional periods for WCW but Funk vs. Flair was the main feud so let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from Great American Bash where Funk and Muta destroyed Flair until Sting made the save.

The word on the street is that Gary Hart has something planned. Here’s Gary Hart who says there are no problems in his camp.

Road Warriors vs. Samoan Swat Team

The Samoans come out to the Halloween theme song. Dangerously is managing the Samoans. The Samoans are Fatu and Samu, more famous as the Headshrinkers. Samu hits the floor to hide but Animal throws him right back in. Hawk gets sent to the floor and takes a powerslam for two back in. Bearhug eats up some time and there’s the unseen tag. A very modified version of the Demolition Decapitator gets two. Fatu comes off the top and jumps into a boot (you know the spot I’m talking about) and Animal is tagged to clean house. Everything breaks down, Heyman’s phone hits a Samoan and the Device ends Fatu.

Rating: C. Man the crowd was excited for this. It was a power match and a pretty quick one at that but sometimes that’s all you need to have. Decent enough match though and at times that works best. The Warriors were just about to jump over to the WWF but they were still as popular as anyone.

The Samoans yell at Heyman and fire him post match. He wouldn’t manage again until the summer.

Cuban Assassin vs. Z-Man

There were a lot of assassins in wrestling. This is Z-Man’s debut. For once this isn’t Jack Victory under a mask but rather just a guy from Cuba. Off to a quick armbar as Z-Man controls early. Zenk channels his inner Jericho and uses about a dozen armdrags and armbars. Of all things a sleeper ends this.

Rating: D-. This was one of the weakest debuts I’ve seen for a face in a long time. Z-Man was really boring here and the ending didn’t prove anything. He’s a cruiserweight style guy so he uses a bunch of arm holds and then a sleeper for the end? Seriously? I’m thinking it wasn’t exactly the WWF screwing him over that got him out of there. He has some crazy ideas about it or whatever, but it could very well be that he’s REALLY dull.

Here’s The World According To Theodore R. Long. He’s in a recording studio and plays it kind of like a radio show. It’s really stupid and it’s basically just a rundown of upcoming house shows.

It’s Ric Flair Day in South Carolina. The governor gives him a plaque. Ok then.

Ranger Ross vs. Sid Vicious

Sid is just SCARY over. He hits Ranger in the head and they go to the floor. Ross gets in a few strikes but the move we would call The Eye of the Storm and a powerbomb end this quick.

Now we get a vignette of Robin Green (Nancy Sullivan/Benoit/Woman, the innocent manager of Rick Steiner) and Missy Hyatt get a limo to go shopping. I have no idea what the point of this is. You also can’t hear a word they’re saying because the car is so loud. This is like a high school show in the late 80s. Now they go jewelery shopping. I think this is supposed to be Robin being all out of character.

The Freebirds say they’re awesome.

World Tag Titles: Freebirds vs. Steiner Brothers

The Birds are champions and this is the Steiners’ first shot at the titles. Scott is a totally different guy here, to the point where he was a nod of the head away from being handed the world title and being made the focus of all of WCW in about 1991. Flair flat out said you say the time I’ll lay down for you. Think about that for a minute. Then he destroyed his arm and didn’t get the title for 9 years. That’s wrestling for you.

Missy and Robin are here with the brothers. Scott is in regular trunks here so you can tell he’s brand new. Scott vs. Hayes starts us off. Hayes stalls a lot and then stalls a lot more. Scott speeds things up but runs into the left hand which is one of Hayes’ big moves. A top rope cross body by Hayes is rolled through for two and Scott cleans house. Garvin comes in and Scott runs over him too. A SWEET reverse German hits and here’s a tag to Rick. Scott looked like Kurt Angle out there.

Rick knocks both of the Birds to the floor and gets on all fours. Hayes comes in next and dances a lot, just ticking Rick off even more. There’s a powerslam and one for Garvin as he tries a sneak attack. Hayes gets in a few punches so Rick just mauls him and hits a release belly to belly. Rick then misses one of the hardest charges ever into the corner. Garvin comes in with his DDT finisher but Scott makes the save.

Back to Hayes who sends him out to the floor for more of a beating. Rick gets beaten down for awhile as we’re just waiting for Scott to come in and start breaking stuff. Garvin comes back in and hits a running knee to the head for two. Time for a chinlock but Rick snapmares out of it. Why don’t more people use that as a counter?

There’s the tag to Scott (thanks for telling me JR. No seriously, the camera cut to the crowd so we didn’t see if he made it or not) and it’s Frankensteiners (and I mean standing ones, not ones out of the corner) and a BIG powerslam for Hayes. Scott hits the ropes but someone (presumably one of the girls but we intentionally can’t see which) trips him and a quick DDT keeps the titles on the Birds.

Rating: B-. If you’ve EVER been unclear about why people rave and rave some more about Scott Steiner, go find this match right now, keeping in mind that he’s 24 here and had been on national TV as a wrestler for about 3 months. This was one of the most impressive performances I’ve seen in a LONG time. By the way, it was Robin that tripped Scott. She turned heel and debuted Doom soon thereafter. The Steiners got the titles in November.

Norman the Lunatic vs. Brian Pillman

Norman is more famous as Bastian Booger. He’s just what his name says here: a lunatic from the state hospital. Pillman is young, undefeated, and AWESOME at this point. He comes out with the University of South Carolina Cheerleaders and goes off, hitting all kinds of high flying moves which Norman can’t even begin to keep up with. After a springboard clothesline and a dive to the floor, Brian goes for Norman’s key (he brought it with him and freaked whenever anyone touched it) but it goes nowhere.

Middle rope splash gets two for Norman. Out to the floor and Norman splashes him against the post. A second one misses though and a missile dropkick puts Norman down and PILLMAN SLAMS HIM!!! AND A BACKDROP!!! A middle rope cross body is countered into a powerslam for two. Holy crap this is AWESOME. Out of nowhere Pillman grabs a crucifix for the kind of upset pin.

Rating: B. WHERE IN THE WORLD DID THIS COME FROM??? I know I said Pillman was awesome but I didn’t expect that. Pillman was flying all over the place and pulling off stuff that would make Rey Mysterio jealous in 1996. This was incredible and as you can see, Bill Watts was an idiot for wanting to ban this kind of stuff because….why did he want to do that anyway?

Gary Hart insists Terry Funk is here when everyone else says he isn’t.

Mike Rotundo vs. Steve Williams

This is pretty much the very final blowoff of the entire Varsity Club. Williams is freshly face again and gets caught coming in but he’s like “Boy I’m Steve Williams” and clotheslines Williams down then does the still scary gorilla press reps on the slam. Back to the floor where Rotundo hammers away and the fans are all over Rotundo as he hooks an abdominal stretch. Rotundo keeps knocking him down and hooks a chinlock. Even in that Williams won’t stop moving.

Back up and Rotundo puts his feet on the ropes to cheat but Williams won’t go down. A jawebreaker finally gets Steve out of the hold but an elbow misses. The idea here is that Rotundo knows if Williams gets any kind of momentum going then Rotundo is going to die so he has to keep moving every chance he can. A pair of thumbs to the eye slows Williams down and Rotundo goes up. Williams slams him off after getting a RUNNING START.

I’ve told you this before but this guy was the Brock Lesnar of his day. Just SCARY strong and a legit amateur wrestler. Williams misses a charge but Rotundo accidentally dives over the top. Back in the Stampede is countered but Williams holds on and takes him to the mat in kind of a rollup for the surprise pin. The count was cool looking as the referee dove and counted at the same time, sliding on each count.

Rating: B-. Another fun match. This show has rocked so far and Williams just blew away Rotundo here. The idea here was that they never stopped moving out there. Even the rest holds had something going on like using ropes for leverage and Doc (Williams’ nickname was Dr. Death and JR often called him Doc) kept fighting to get out of them. That’s the difference between working and being boring: you can take almost anything in a match and make it more entertaining but you NEVER see that today, which is a shame.

Lex says he’s awesome.

US Title: Tommy Rich vs. Lex Luger

Lex is champion but Rich is an old NWA superhero so he’s very popular here. Lex is a total heel but he was so awesome at this point that you couldn’t help but cheer for him, meaning he gets a bigger pop than Rich here. We hear about how great Rich used to be and JR manages to get cowboy boots into the analysis somehow. Not much to start but Luger uses his power to keep control. He’s a heel but keeps getting cheered.

Rich gets in a right hand and grabs an armbar which gets him nowhere. Cross body gets two and it’s back to the arm. Lex avoids a dropkick and powerslams him for two. He works on the back a bit but Rich hooks a sunset flip for two and Luger goes outside. Back in Lex works on the back some more but the Rack is countered. Superplex gets two. Lex goes up (???) and misses a top rope splash.

Rich starts his comeback and pounds away, hitting a middle rope punch for two. Thesz Press gets the same due to Lex putting his foot on the ropes. In some trivia for you, that’s what he won his world title with. Rich misses a punch and hits the post, only to grab a sleeper while Lex is on the apron. Luger hits a hangman on the top rope for the pin to retain.

Rating: C. Decent match here but not quite as energetic as the previous two matches. Rich is a guy that I think you have to watch a lot of to get the appeal of. Not a great match or anything but more competitive than you would think. That being said, Rich was pure Memphis and that style doesn’t work well with Luger’s power game.

Gary Hart has some more to say. He’s going to let the nation know about something. Hart has a letter from a doctor and there’s a tape from Funk in a hospital bed with a bad arm. Funk talks about how he almost lost his arm and no matter what he’ll be at the Clash tonight.

Sting and Flair (in the classic black robe) say bring it on Funk.

Great Muta/Dick Slater vs. Sting/Ric Flair

Muta is TV Champion here and I think undefeated. He and Sting start which should be awesome. This was one of the hottest feuds of 89 and definitely one of the best. They speed things way up to start and Sting knocks him to the floor very quickly. Back in and they fight over a headlock but Sting grabs an armdrag and works a wristlock. The crowd is WAY into this.

Flair comes in and the fans wake up even more. This is the first time he’s ever been in the ring with Muta. Muta takes a bunch of chops and punches so he collapses into the corner to bring in Slater. Flair beats him up too until Slater sends him into the corner and over the top. Flair runs the apron, hits a running chop to Muta, goes up and hits a top rope elbow to take out Slater.

Dirty Dick (worst nickname ever) kicks Flair to the floor and Muta dives on him. Everyone heads to the floor and it all breaks down. The good guys rule the ring and Hart, the manager, calls a conference. Slater has a cast on his forearm/wrist. Naturally Flair and Sting work it over. This is still the smart Flair, as in the one before Hogan made him an idiot. Sting grabs an armbar and so does Flair. They’re tagging very fast.

Slater comes in and is immediately suplexed for two. Back to Muta quickly and the dominance continues. Muta does the classic heel move of raking the eyes and hits the Handspring Elbow to keep Flair in trouble. Slater comes in and pounds away before sending Flair to the floor. Muta back in now and he hits that snap elbow. A nerve hold is broken and it’s off to Sting. This has been good so far.

Stinger Splash to Muta but Gary Hart comes in to hit Sting in the back of the head with a roll of coins to break up the Deathlock. That only gets two and now both the fans and JR are really getting into this. A powerbomb by Muta gets two. They go to the floor and Flair makes a running save. Back in Slater puts on a sleeper but Sting breaks it up with a jawbreaker and both guys are down.

There’s the hot tag to Flair and he does his best Fifi imitation to clean house. Everything breaks down and Muta gets dropkicked to the floor. Sting goes to pull him back in but takes mist in the face. Oh and it’s yellow too! Slater hits Flair with the cast to bust him open. Down goes the referee and here’s Terry Funk with a plastic bag to TRY TO SUFFOCATE FLAIR. TAKE THAT PG ERA!!! It’s all thrown out of course.

Rating: B+. Pretty awesome tag match here and it plays up to the feud that was going on with Funk vs. Flair, setting up an I Quit match at a future Clash. Slater didn’t really mean much in this as they shifted it back to Muta soon here. Very good tag match here that really needed a finish but still great.

Sting takes a branding iron to the knee. Flair apparently got mouth to mouth by Pillman to wake him up. I’m sure he’s glad that wasn’t on camera. Flair gets medical attention to end the show.

Overall Rating: A. THIS is how you do a TV show. Other than the Z-Man match which is less than four minutes long, there isn’t a bad match on here and you get two or three very good ones, plus a total star making performance by Scott Steiner. Couple that with a great main event that moves the feuds forward and this is one of the best Clashes I’ve ever seen. Find a copy of it because it’s worth seeing.

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Impact Wrestling
Date: December 29, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s the last show of the year and we have one more Impact after this before we get to Genesis. Unless my memory is off (and it very well may be), there are only two matches set: D-Von vs. Pope and the title match. There are a lot of other matches which you can pretty much assume but I don’t think they’ve been named yet. I’d expect a lot of that tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video about the Knockouts situation.

Gail and Madison come to the ring with the latter demanding Tara and Tessmacher get out here now. She says that she needs to get rid of the diseases that Tara and Tessmacher carry around with them. And they’re both fired. Cue Sting and Madison kind of panics. She says she has this under control but Sting says it’s not over until he says it’s over. Madison doesn’t have a legally binding contract like Karen had so she has no power. They get into a funny shouting contest and Gail has to defend against Mickie tonight.

Steiner tells Abyss that they’re the best team out there. Abyss agrees that they’re a team. Ok then.

Wildcard Tag Title Tournament Semi-Finals: Abyss/Scott Steiner vs. AJ Styles/Kazarian

Kaz vs. Steiner start us off but Scott yells at AJ before the match gets going. Nothing happens there so it’s off to the Grand Slam winners. AJ uses strikes and avoids the power. Steiner cheats a bit and Shock Treatment gets no cover on AJ. Steiner comes in and beats on AJ some more but AJ hits a Pele to counter.

Double tag brings in Kaz vs. Abyss in I guess a rematch from the X Title match earlier this year. Man that sounds like forever again. Kaz fires off whatever he can including a springboard tornado DDT for two. Chokeslam is countered into a victory roll for two. The second attempt at a chokeslam puts Kaz down and Abyss knocks AJ into the barricade. He brings in Steiner…and hits him with the Black Hole Slam to send the former Fourtune guys to the finals at 7:50.

Rating: C-. Not a bad tag match but I couldn’t get into it for the most part. Abyss turning on Steiner isn’t really all that shocking and it’s good to see a team that makes sense going to the finals of this thing, although I have a feeling the wacky team is going to wind up winning the thing, because that’s what TNA thinks is the right idea.

Ray comes out to yell at Abyss post match and we take a break.

Post break Ray yells at him and says he’s tired of Abyss being a bully to him and Steiner. Abyss grabs him by the throat and Ray asks him what it’ll take to get him back into Immortal. Abyss wants Ray one on one at Genesis. If Abyss loses, he’s back into Immortal. Ray goes to leave but Abyss stops him. The match is Monster’s Ball.

Sting is with Kurt in the back and they talk about the incident last week in Tennessee. It’s Angle vs. Storm at the PPV and Kurt is getting a tuneup match tonight. It’s with RVD.

Flair and Gunner say Gunner will be great. Gunner is in action later tonight. Flair looks really old. Gunner is looking to put someone in an ambulance tonight.

Anthony Nese vs. Zema Ion

It’s the final match in the series and it’s contract on a pole. Well what else would it be? Aries is in on commentary here. The winner of this joins Aries, Kash and Sorensen. According to Aries, Ion has pole experience while being an exotic dancer. Both guys tease going for the pole but it turns into your regular “I go for the pole, you stop me then you go for the pole and I stop you.”

They go to the floor where Nese takes over. Nese goes for the contract but Ion saves. Ion goes for the contract but Nese saves. Nese hits a German off the top but hangs himself in the Tree of Woe. He goes for the contract again but gets shoved into the barricade. And then Ion gets the contract at 4:33.

Rating: D+. Ok then. I mean really, ok then, let’s go to the next match. There’s nothing interesting here at all and now we have a new challenger. There’s nothing different about these two other than Ion has messier hair. The matches were ok and that’s about it. I don’t know what the point of this being a series but whatever.

Gunner vs. Douglas Williams

Total dominance for awhile by Gunner and then they go to the floor. Gunner shoves the referee and it’s a DQ at 1:38.

Williams takes the DDT on the concrete post match.

Roode’s family still doesn’t like him.

Here’s Roode who says it’s no shock that he’s selfish. His friends and family have all turned their backs on him, but tonight he’s brought one of his friends here. This name is Tracy and they’ve been friends for over twenty years. Tracy stands up and gets an ovation for some reason. Roode apologizes for not answering his calls and texts lately. Tracy has been brought here tonight to say whatever he wants.

He talks about how everyone is missing him and wondering where Roode has been. His wife wants to know where he is and his kids want to know why Tracy is driving them to hockey practice. Bobby can still come home. Roode says that back in high school, Tracy was his lackey. Roode says his family’s fifteen minutes of fame are up and goes to leave, then he beats Tracy up. Jeff runs out for the save.

Eric and ODB have more “comedy”.

Angle rants about facing RVD later tonight.

Wildcard Tag Team Tournament Semi-Finals: Magnus/Samoa Joe vs. ODB/Eric Young

Eric locks up with Tenay on the way to the ring. See it’s funny. Eric and Magnus start but ODB comes in before there’s any contact. There’s no contact as both circle the other in a flirty manner. Tag off to Eric who strips and comes in. Remember when Joe says Eric was all awesome at Turning Point 07? I don’t think this is what he intended. Joe comes in and has a decent mini-match with Eric. ODB gets launched to the floor and the MuscleBuster sends Joe and Magnus to the finals at 5:14.

Rating: D+. The comedy here wasn’t funny, but it’s Eric Young who does the same nonsense every week. To be fair though, the guy can’t get over without a CRAZY comedy gimmick so he has to do this. Not much here and I have a feeling the random pairing will beat the normal team to get the shot because that’s how TNA works. Nowhere near as bad as it could be though so it’s not much of a complaint.

Mickie says the title match will be interesting.

Kurt Angle vs. Rob Van Dam

So the girls are main eventing? Ok then. Basic stuff to start as neither guy has much of an advantage so far. Rob kicks a lot and hits Rolling Thunder for two. Kurt snaps off a belly to belly for the same and a regular suplex gets two also. After a quick chinlock Van Dam takes over again with some clotheslines. Kurt gets in a shot and tries a superkick but Van Dam takes him down. Five Star misses and there’s the ankle lock. And here’s Storm to superkick Angle for the DQ at 5:17.

Rating: C-. Nothing special at all here but the ending was something that needed to happen. That’s going to be a great match once it happens at Genesis and I can live with Storm losing if they have a third match. Not bad here but they needed a few more minutes to get something special going, which to be fair wasn’t the idea here.

RVD isn’t thrilled with Storm coming out there.

Angle isn’t either.

Storm says he’s coming for Angle.

Knockouts Title: Mickie James vs. Gail Kim

Mickie grabs a rollup for two almost immediately. Thesz Press hits and Mickie takes over. Mickie sends her to the floor but misses a baseball slide. A neckbreaker hits though and we take a break. Back with a slugout on the floor won by Gail as they go back into the ring. Gail grabs the arm for some cranking.

Mickie fights back but Gail hooks Inoki’s Octopus Hold. I can’t say I’m complaining about the visual. Mickie rolls into the ropes so Gail tries it again but it doesn’t work as well this time. Ok so maybe it does. After she gets done with that, a missile dropkick gets two for the champ. Eat Defeat is countered and Mickie hits a kick of her own to put both chicks down. Mickie makes her comeback and goes up but Gail heads to the floor. Mickie tries a Thesz Press to the floor but leaves it short so it doesn’t look that great. Her knee is hurt so a masked chick runs in, hits the Rayne Drop on Mickie and Gail get the pin at 14:17.

Rating: C. FAR better Knockout match than the Knockouts or Divas have done lately but still nothing all that great. I’ll give them points for having something else in the main event but the ending kind of sucked, especially given what’s shown post match. Not sure why they went with this to end the year but whatever.

Post match, yep that’s Madison with facepaint.

Overall Rating: C-. I won’t say the show was bad tonight, but it didn’t click for me. Things ran well and the storylines are pretty logical, but for the most part they’re not grabbing me which is probably more preference than anything else. The problem is mainly on top as Roode still comes off as a midcard guy in the main event. Not bad, but not something I was able to get into.

Results
Kazarian/AJ Styles b. Abyss/Scott Steiner – Kazarian b. Steiner after a Black Hole Slam from Abyss
Zema Ion b. Anthony Nese – Ion grabbed the contract
Douglas Williams b. Gunner via DQ when Gunner shoved the referee
Samoa Joe/Magnus b. ODB/Eric Young – MuscleBuster to Young
Gail Kim b. Mickie James – Pin after a Rayne Drop from Madison Rayne

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Spring Stampede 1999
Date: April 11, 1999
Location: Tacoma Dome, Tacoma, Washington
Attendance: 17,690
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

This is the final part of the WCW stretch thank goodness. These past two shows have just killed me as they’ve been completely awful. This show HAS to be better than those. I mean the law of averages has to catch up with WCW eventually right? The main event tonight is a fatal fourway for the title with Hogan vs. Nash for Flair’s title. Oh and Goldberg vs. Nash. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is just a clip reel of the four guys in the main event.

The set is an old style one almost like Nitro but with a Spring Stampede logo and set to it. I like it.

Blitzkrieg vs. Juventud Guerrera

I’ve heard a ton of great things about Blitzkrieg but I don’t remember him that well. Apparently he’s one of the more insane high fliers ever. I’ve heard his music before somewhere but I can’t place it. The winner faces the Cruiserweight Champion tomorrow night. They shake hands pre match and the crowd is hot. They go to the mat quickly and Juvy might have pulled his mask a bit. Well if you wear one it might get pulled you lunkhead.

They speed things up and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two for Blitzkrieg. Blitzkrieg pounds away in the corner but Juvy comes back with a springboard dropkick to take over. Blitzkrieg goes outside so Juvy hits a great dive to the floor. Brainbuster gets two. Here’s a surfboard which always amazes me. Blitzkrieg speeds things up and hits a spin kick. A dropkick puts Juvy outside and Blitzkrieg sets for a dive but Juvy sees it coming and dropkicks him out of the air.

Back in and Juvy is sent out again. HUGE spinning moonsault by Blitzkrieg kills him and they go back in. Things speed up and they bust out some slick counters. A move we would call Yang Time misses for Blitzkrieg and the Juvy Driver is countered as well. Blitzkrieg tries what I guess you would call a spinning hurricanrana into a victory roll driver out of the corner for two. They go up again and Juvy counters the same move into a Juvy Driver off the middle rope for the pin.

Rating: B. Again, the old school WCW formula works: a big fast paced match to open the show with two guys just going insane out there. Blitzkrieg would only be around a few months and never really had a big match with Mysterio that I remember, which is a shame because it would have been awesome. Good stuff and better than most of the usual stuff from this division.

After a quick recap of Hak vs. Bigelow, here’s your generic hardcore match for the night.

Hak vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Hak comes out carrying a table and wrapped in barbed wire. He is, not the table. The brawl begins on the floor and they go to the wagon. Hak has hidden a table under there. Well of course he has. He hits a HUGE swanton off the wagon through the table. Chastity, Hak’s chick, gets the gimmicks (Tony’s term for weapons) out and Bigelow shrugs the dive off.

Back to ringside and they hit each other with various metal objects. Tony flat out says that trashcans don’t hurt that badly. What’s with him tonight? Bigelow whacks Hak with said painless can then a kendo stick shot. There’s a plastic salad bowl to the head. They botch what I think was a suplex and Bigelow falls on Hak’s knees. Out to the floor and here comes a ladder.

Hak dropkicks it into Bigelow and then hits another Swanton onto the ladder onto Bigelow. Now he busts out a piece of a barricade and the table falls to the floor. The ladder is up in the ring and the table is like a bridge between the ring and barricade. Hak climbs up for no apparent reason and goes crashing down through it. Back in the ring there’s a barricade in one corner and a ladder in the other.

Hak gets crotched on the barricade which Bigelow picks up. He stands there with it forever because Chastity is late with the extinguisher. The distraction lets the White Russian Leg Sweep put Bam Bam down. And then he hits what’s supposed to be the Greetings From Asbury Park (single shoulder sitout Tombstone) off the middle rope through the table but it was more like a powerslam. Either way it ends things.

Rating: D+. Not bad but this was just another hardcore match in WCW. Neither guy was worth anything other than this but it filled in a little over ten minutes. The ending bump was pretty solid but the match was nothing memorable at all, which is the major problem with this division as a whole. In WWF, they were bad but they were funny. These just aren’t that good.

Mikey Whipwreck vs. Scotty Riggs

Riggs is a narcissist style character here. I have no idea why this match is happening but that’s WCW for you. Riggs dances around like Rick Rude and tries to show Mikey up. There’s been practically no contact in the first minute. Mikey slaps him in the face and it’s the Cody Rhodes idea where he’s freaked because his face was touched. Riggs is knocked to the floor and this is nothing to see.

Mikey puts his throat over the bottom rope and hits a slingshot legdrop. A rana off the apron drives the top of Riggs’ head into the floor. Get this over with already. Another attempt at the legdrop misses and Mikey goes into the railing. Dropkick takes him down and I put on a Jimmy Stewart movie from the 30s. A quick chinlock gets a big BORING chant. Mikey hits a middle rope dropkick for two. And then Riggs hits a forearm for the pin.

Rating: F. If Scotty Riggs getting a featured match on PPV in 1999 wasn’t enough, the match was terribly boring. The problem here was that no one had any reason to care about these guys and Riggs was in a nothing gimmick that we had seen a million times before. I mean how many times have you seen a character that is obsessed with his looks and talks about how pretty he is?

We recap Disco Inferno vs. Konnan. Konnan had a music video which Disco made a parody of. There’s your match.

Konnan vs. Disco Inferno

Oh and Disco is in the Wolfpack here….kind of. Konnan makes what I presume are gay jokes about Disco’s looks to start. Disco imitates Konnan and hits his rolling lariat. He goes up but Konnan shakes his crotch at him so Disco hops down. Ok then. Konnan takes over and hits his seated dropkick. Konnan has a big bandage on his head which I missed before. They’re both in camo pants. K-Dawg climbs the corner with a running armdrag. Not bad.

Off to the chinlock section of the match. Can we vote to get that removed? It happens in almost every match and it’s really dull. Disco hits a middle rope elbow for two. Konnan gets sent to the floor and this has been almost all Disco. I think he finally realizes he’s fighting Disco Inferno and comes back with the 187 (fisherman’s DDT) for two. Disco gets the same off a neckbreaker. After a bunch of clotheslines miss, Konnan hits Disco’s own finisher the Last Dance (Stunner) for the pin.

Rating: C-. Oddly enough this was better because of Disco. Had he had a workable gimmick and maybe a name change, he could have been a decent midcard guy. The problem is he’s most famous for the idiotic character and he never could escape it. Still though, he wasn’t half bad here.

We recap Kidman vs. Mysterio for the Cruiserweight Title. Rey took the title from Kidman, and they’re also tag team champions. This is the rematch.

Cruiserweight Title: Billy Kidman vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

Winner gets Juvy tomorrow night. They do some nice flips to start without much damage being done. Rey gets a headscissors and has a small advantage. Kidman hits one of his own and the first two minutes or so are a stalemate. Rey gets backdropped to the floor and there’s a dive which gets very little reaction. Kidman takes over and Rey goes into the barricade. That’s a surprising amount of violence from two face champions that are smaller guys.

Now Rey sends him back to the floor. Kidman shows off some impressive strength and catches the Asai Moonsault attempt. Rey goes into the steps and both guys are getting mad. Lionsault gets two for the champ. Another rana attempt is countered into a running powerbomb. The crowd is pretty silent for this and to their credit it’s a pretty slow match so far. BK Bomb gets two. They go to the floor and Kidman hits a Shooting Star off the apron.

Back in the World’s Strongest Slam puts Rey down but Kidman jumps into a dropkick. The fans sound like they’re at a golf tournament that doesn’t have Tiger Woods in it. They both go to the top and Rey hits a top rope bulldog for two. I really don’t understand this crowd. The match isn’t a classic or anything but they’re hitting some BIG spots in this. Kidman hits the chinlock and the fans don’t react at all.

After a quick trip to the floor, Rey takes over again. He dives into a clothesline though which is a nice little nod to earlier in the match. The crowd again does not care. Heenan talks about Rey’s fatigue pants and how there are a bunch of pockets in them. “Wouldn’t it be fun to load those up with illegal objects?” Tony and Mike of course use that to talk about Hak and Bigelow, because they don’t get the idea of a heel commentator. Bobby might as well be running with an anchor.

Rey gets a facejam for two. He looks like he’s about to cry. Mysterio gets taken down into position for a Shooting Star but he’s playing possum. Kidman counters his whatever into a sunset bomb off the top for two. AND THE CROWD STILL DOESN’T CARE. Rey counters a wheelbarrow suplex off the top into a sitout bulldog for two. That’s what he won the title with in the first place. A top rope Fameasser and standing moonsault get two for Rey. Kidman blocks a powerbomb and tries another shooting star but Rey breaks it up again. There’s a top rope rana into a rollup for the pin for Rey.

Rating: B-. I really want to understand the issues with the crowd here. This wasn’t a classic or anything but it was really a pretty good match. The near falls until the end were really hot and the crowd just sat there. I don’t know if they were burned out by a weak stretch of matches or what but I was really confused by it.

We recap Raven/Saturn vs. Malenko/Benoit. The Horsemen were tag champs and were fighting Raven 2-1 for some reason. Saturn came in to help and got a submission but it didn’t count for some reason. Raven and Saturn cost the Horsemen the titles so this is a grudge match. See how easy it can be to set up a non-title feud?

Raven/Perry Saturn vs. Dean Malenko/Chris Benoit

Anderson is with the Horsemen here. Raven and Saturn bring out a table. Oh and if you don’t believe WCW went on talent raids in ECW, I present you with this match. Saturn is in a leather skirt because of some big thing with Jericho. The fans are all over the Horsemen already. Dean stalls to start and MAN the fans are on him. Oh ok he’s stalling on the apron so much because Benoit is starting.

The Canadian sends him to the floor and Saturn sends the Horsemen into each other. Off to Raven as Benoit gets beaten down. Benoit dropkicks Raven to the floor so Anderson/Malenko can double team him. Something like a double spinebuster puts Raven down and they work on his legs/hamstrings. The crowd pops more for a Raven kickout than anything in the previous match.

Lil Naitch is refereeing so he just happens to miss Raven’s small package on Benoit. Clothesline gets two for Benoit and Robinson seems to be counting faster than usual. He stops Saturn from coming in and gets great heat. Saturn comes in and cleans house but Malenko takes him down with a right hand. A modified Doomsday Device by the non-Horsemen gets two as Benoit grabs Rolling Germans on Raven.

Malenko hooks the Cloverleaf on Saturn but he makes the rope. Great drama so far in this. Death Valley Driver hits Malenko but Benoit comes in PERFECTLY to break it up with a Swan Dive which also gets two for Malenko. Things settle down again and Benoit works on Saturn’s leg. Malenko comes in with a sleeper and body scissors. Raven breaks it up and things break down a little again.

After a northern lights suplex we go to the floor where Dean kicks Saturn in the ribs a few times. Back inside and he comes in legally for a change. Chinlock goes on now but I can live with this one as they’re probably getting tired. Raven finally comes in and is on fire. He had a tendency to not be in the ring that often but when he was he was incredibly energetic.

Someone throws in a chair and Raven hits the drop toehold onto it with Benoit’s head going in. Anderson pulls Dean off a table on the floor so Saturn goes through instead. Even Flow takes Dean down but Anderson interferes, allowing the chair to be put on Raven’s head so Benoit can hit a Swan Dive to the chair to Raven’s head and Malenko gets the pin. Great match.

Rating: B+. That’s probably high but I was really getting into this one. The ending is good too as the Horsemen cheat to win and the heat on them was great. Excellent match as they gave four very talented guys time and a story and you got a very good match out of it. If WCW could get that that was the idea of exciting wrestling, they might still be in business today.

We recap the US Title match. Hall had been US Champion but got legit hurt so we had to have a new champion. A tournament started and after some Jericho shenanigans, he didn’t make the finals. Instead it’ll be Booker, the TV Champion, against Scott Steiner. Stevie Ray might be in his brother’s corner here but it’s not entirely clear.

US Title: Scott Steiner vs. Booker T

Scott gets in an argument with a fan as the fan’s girlfriend keeps rubbing his chest. Funnier than it sounds. This goes on for a good while as Steiner keeps yelling at fans. Steiner finally gets in the ring and then goes to the ropes to avoid fighting. Back to the floor and now Steiner jumps into the crowd. Steiner finally comes in and taker Booker down with ease.

Booker speeds things up and hits AJ Styles’ drop down into a dropkick to send Scott to the floor. Steiner pounds him down some more and this is looking like it’s not going to be particularly interesting. A clothesline off the apron puts Scott down again as this has been back and forth. Steiner tastes the steel but manages to crotch Booker out of the corner. Out to the floor for some chair shots and we head back inside.

Now we get the push-ups. He shoves the referee and this is going nowhere. There’s a Steroids chant. Belly to belly gets two. Now Steiner just openly chokes the referee and kicks Booker low which isn’t a DQ due to the referee being scared. Steiner has to stop to pose because we need a break or something. Off to a bearhug which is probably the last thing this match needs.

Booker starts to escape but gets caught in a belly to belly drop on the head. It was supposed to be a suplex but it just wasn’t. A DDT puts Scott down and HE ACTUALLY SELLS IT!!! Take a lesson Rick. Booker comes back with some strikes and he goes up top. And there goes the referee. The fans immediately look at the entrance ramp, which shows how jaded they are.

Booker makes his real comeback and hits the axe kick but there’s no referee. Down goes the referee for a second time and Booker gets crotched. Steiner busts out the “Frankensteiner” for two. He pulls out a foreign object and clocks Booker with it for the title. The fans are NOT pleased with that ending.

Rating: D+. I’ve seen worse but the middle part of this was just dreadful. Scott was at least selling here but it wasn’t anything great. This would be the beginning of the mega push that the Steiners got this summer for absolutely no apparent reason other than they were old which is how you get pushed in this company. Still though, not much although Booker would get a lot better push in about a year. Also in a little trivia for you: Scott would win the US Title in a tournament final the next year at Spring Stampede as well.

Recap of Nash vs. Goldberg, although they’re just clips with no actual talking to them.

Kevin Nash vs. Goldberg

Apparently this is the rematch from Starrcade or something. Liz and Luger are here with Nash. Nash says something on the mic but the mic doesn’t seem to work because I didn’t hear a thing. He drives Goldberg to the corner and pounds away knees in the corner. The fans are looking at something to the right of the ring and Nash continues to go as slowly as he can while still being considered alive.

The fans almost immediately chant for Sting as Nash gets a two count. He hits the side slam for another two as this has been completely one sided. The running hip attack to the back of Goldberg while he’s in the 619 position keeps the bald one down. Goldberg snaps off a shoulder block though and something like a hooking superkick to load up the spear. NASH JUMPS OVER GOLDBERG!!! The spear hits the referee so Luger pops Goldberg with the chair. Goldberg blocks the powerbomb with a handful of balls. Spear and Jackhammer end this.

Rating: D+. What in the world was the point of this? Goldberg hit like 5 moves and dominated so he’s back to the point where he used to be, minus the title that is. Still though, was there a point to having this be like seven minutes long? It wasn’t horrible, but I’m sitting here asking if that’s it. Also, was there a point to Luger and Liz being out there? I don’t see it if there was.

Video on the main event. Flair turned heel to win the title last month off Hogan and Page and Sting are there so there can be four guys in it. Savage is guest referee for no apparent reason.

WCW World Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Sting vs. Ric Flair vs. Hulk Hogan

No Michael Buffer for the intros. No tags here and it’s one fall to a finish. This is one of the final matches under the People’s Champion era for Page. Flair is champion and comes out first for some reason. He and Sting pair off as Page fights Hogan. Those two never had a big PPV title match that I remember. Sting almost gets the Deathlock on Page inside a minute but DDP makes the rope.

Hogan and Flair fight up the ramp as Page tries a Diamond Cutter. Everyone back in now and it’s getting hard to call all of this. Sting slams Flair off the top which makes things feel right. Hogan takes the weight belt off and whips at the champ as STING ACTUALLY HITS THE STINGER SPLASH AGAINST THE RAILING!!! I’ve been watching him over twenty years and I’ve never seen him hit that.

The weight belt goes back on as it’s just Hogan vs. Flair in the ring at the moment. Hulk no sells the chops and hits the boot and leg. Sting hooked the Scorpion just before that and has to let it go to break up the pin. Flair gets in a shot at Hogan’s knee, because that’s gone so well before right? The Figure Four goes on and Sting misses his second attempt at a splash.

Hogan turns the hold over and Page has to break it up. Page knocks Flair to the floor and we get the Figure Four around the post on Hogan. The trainer runs out to check on Hogan and he has to leave. Even Bischoff comes out to check on him. So it’s a triple threat now and they’re all in the ring. Sting beats up Flair while Page just chills. Flair, after eleven years, still doesn’t get that chops don’t work on Sting. Flair Flip in the corner and he gets clotheslined to the floor.

Page works on Sting’s ribs but Flair is back in now. Discus lariat gets two. Savage is counting slow and hasn’t meant a thing yet. Stinger Splash hits Page and he slams DDP’s face into the mat. Page tombstones Sting for two as Flair breaks it up. Sting superplexes Flair for two. Page puts a sleeper on Flair who has a sleeper on Sting. Sting hits a jawbreaker on both and they’re all up at 9.

Sting gets double teamed and THAT STILL DOESN’T WORK ON HIM. He hits a double clothesline and beats them both down. Splashes for both guys but Page breaks up the Deathlock on Flair. Death Drop takes Page down but Sting can’t cover. Flair puts the Figure Four on Sting and Sting makes the ropes. Flair won’t break it so Savage drags them to the middle of the ring and drops the elbow (Sky Elbow according to Tony) to break it up. A Diamond Cutter to Flair gives Page his first world title.

Rating: C-. Not the worst match ever but I really don’t get what Savage was needed in there for other than a single move. A lot of this dragged really badly but they at least did something. It may not have been interesting but they were doing something. Page turned heel soon after this and it bombed HORRIBLY because people had gotten behind him for being the scrappy underdog that kept pushing until he reached the top. As in like Hardy whose heel turn also bombed. Funny how that works isn’t it?

Overall Rating: C+. WOW this was so much better than the previous two shows. I mean man this was a breath of fresh air and a lot of that is because they had some relatively clean endings. You couple that with longer matches and only one match that had no business being on PPV (arguably) and you get a decent show. It’s nothing great but it’s certainly better than the two that follow this one.

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Great American Bash 1999
Date: June 13, 1999
Location: Baltimore Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 11,672
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Mike Tenay

This isn’t intentionally after the other GAB reviews I was doing. It just turned out that way. This is one of the last shows under Nash’s time with the book and therefore, it’s technically ok but it’s not interesting at all for the most part. The main event is Nash vs. Savage for Nash’s title. Other than that it’s your run of the mill show of the last year WCW had any prayer of ever making a comeback to at least respectable. Let’s get to it.

Master P. and his group of guys, the No Limit Soldiers, arrive. Curt Hennig pops up and praises him, saying P is the king of rap. He asks for an autograph and P says sure, signing a CD for him. Hennig destroys it and the rap vs. country feud is on. You know, for a southern based company. Yeah, let’s make a rap group faces here and pay P over 200 grand per appearance, yes I said PER APPEARANCE, and expect him to be popular.

The opening video is about Nash vs. Savage, who have been terrorizing each other while Savage wears a big pink fur coat. Savage: “You’re a stupid person.” A lot of mud was slung, and I mean that literally. This was the thick of the Hummer Driver angle, where someone was driving a big white Hummer and trying to run people over with it. The driver was never officially revealed, but it was heavily implied to be one of about 5 people. You know, I spent a long time trying to figure out why WCW died, and the best answer I can give you is to watch the show and you’ll get it yourself.

The announcers actually recap the Hennig vs. Master P showdown. IT WAS THREE MINUTES AGO!!! They talk about Nash vs. Savage a bit.

Here’s a video on….well on almost every match on the card. Is there a reason they’re filling in time like this?

Now here’s a video just on Knobbs vs. Hak (Sandman) which is the opener. Knobbs has joined the First Family, which is Jimmy Hart’s lower card stable.

Brian Knobbs vs. Hardcore Hak

WCW tried a Hardcore Division but this is a kendo stick match, whatever that means. Is that…..is that……is that a cover of My Sharona that Knobbs is coming out to? Why in the world is he coming out to a cover of My Sharona? Brian says it’s Mrs. Nasty’s birthday today. I wonder if he’s going to take her to the Baltimore Science Museum and do science experiments with her. He wants this to be just a hardcore match. Hak comes out to what used to be Mongo’s music. He walks around the ring for awhile and wastes even more time.

Knobbs wants a hardcore match and the way to do that is to throw the weapons out. The opening bell is at 12:42 into the show. Knobbs hits Hak with a trashcan and then hits him with the lid of it. At least he’s complete with his assault. There’s a Pit Stop and Hak gets hit in the head again. He gets his feet up to kick a chair back into Knobbs’ face and momentum shifts. I would say the pendulum has swung but I’m not bringing Gorilla into this.

Here comes a ladder and it gets thrown at Knobbs from the floor. A slingshot legdrop hits the ladder but Knobbs sells it anyway. The leg gets put around Knobbs’ leg and hit with a chair. Knobbs sends him into the ladder. There isn’t going to be much more than this people. Then again, that’s all there needs to be here. Knobbs beats him down again and the fans chant for Hak.

Hak makes a comeback and tries a Swanton onto the ladder but Knobbs moves. Tony suggests a table and the fans want one as well. We don’t get one though as Hak throws him into a chair, which isn’t something you see every day. That and a shot from a kendo stick is enough for the pin.

Rating: D. Yes it was bad, but the whole point of this was to get the crowd into things and these matches usually did that. Besides, it’s not like either of these guys are good for anything else but Knobbs is a Hoganite so they have to have something for him right? Nothing match but it was fine for what it was.

Hugh Morrus and Knobbs destroy Hak post match.

Buff Bagwell thanks Piper for giving him a big match (it’s against Disco Inferno) and says he’ll have Piper’s back in the match with Flair tonight for the presidency.

Van Hammer vs. Mikey Whipwreck

So Whipwreck was a crowd favorite in ECW so he came to WCW and did nothing. This resulted in him being mentioned in a booking meeting and Kevin Nash, the booker, not knowing who he was. Hammer was in the middle of a moderate push so he’ll be killing Mikey here. The announcers talk about who’s driving the Hummer to kill time because this match is going to be very boring.

Hammer beats on Mikey whose speed moves aren’t working at all. He tries a monkey flip but Hammer grabs him by the head and slams him off the top. The fans chant boring and I can’t exactly disagree. A delayed vertical suplex gets NO pop. You can tell that a match is dull when a move which is an incredible power display like that just quiets the crowd.

Time for an abdominal stretch. This was the only match not advertised in the opening montage. If that surprises you, it shouldn’t. Out to the floor and Mikey gets dropped onto the barricade. A dive to the floor keeps Mikey down. Back in Whipwreck comes off the top for two. And then he jumps into a release spinebuster and a cobra clutch slam for the pin.

Rating: D-. Why in the world was this on PPV? Van Hammer got a push around this time but it went nowhere because Rick Steiner destroyed him at Bash at the Beach. Whipwreck would be back in ECW later in the year along with Sandman, which they probably never should have left in the first place. However, how can you turn down the huge money?

Buff Bagwell vs. Disco Inferno

….why? What did I ever do to WCW? I watched Nitro through 2000. Why are they doing this to me? Disco starts off with a neckbreaker so Bagwell hits the floor. Basic stuff to start here as Disco dances after every move he hits. Disco is the evil one here. Buff loads up the Blockbuster but Disco hits the floor. This is a rematch from Nitro which Bagwell won. Then why is it happening again?

They stall even more and work on the arm until Disco speeds things up and hits a clothesline to take over. Surprising amount of offense here from him. Disco goes up top and dances before hitting a middle rope elbow for two. He tries it again but Buff moves and takes over. Bagwell loads up the Blockbuster but Disco knocks him to the floor. Stunner (Last Dance, Disco’s finisher) hits on the floor but he doesn’t throw Buff back in. The Macarena Piledriver (exactly what it sounds like) is countered and Buff hammers him down. Blockbuster ends this clean.

Rating: D. Technically this was fine, but why in the world was this on PPV? It has to do with Piper giving the young guys a chance, but it’s not like that means anything for reasons you’ll see later on. Also, Bagwell is FAR better as a face than as a heel. He has some solid natural charisma, but they turned him heel so many times that it stopped meaning anything at all.

Recap of the Rednecks vs. the Rap Guys. It’s your standard culture clash feud and since it’s WCW, they missed the point of being a southern company and country being popular because they’re not that smart.

DJ Ran, a DJ who would shout and ask where the loudest section of the arena was, shouts and asks where the loudest section of the arena is. He brings out Master P and his No Limit Soldiers.

Konnan/Rey Mysterio vs. Curt Hennig/Bobby Duncum Jr.

Here’s another brilliant WCW moment for you: the Rednecks (officially named the West Texas Rednecks) had a song they performed themselves called Rap Is Crap. Being a southern company, it actually got on a few radio stations in Dixie and was requested a few times. Cool, free publicity right?

Now a smart company would release it as a single, maybe make a few dollars and possibly turn the Rednecks face right? Well since it’s WCW, they sent the radio stations cease and desist letters for using their material without permission. Vince may be crazy and not get it a lot of the time, but you know he’s know how to capitalize on something like that.

Anyway, Rey is Cruiserweight Champion and he and Konnan come out in gas masks. Konnan and Rey clear the ring quickly and Master P slaps Hennig in the back of the head. Konnan and Duncum start us off and it’s off to Rey quickly. He speeds things up but jumps into a backbreaker. Powerbomb brings in Hennig. Rey gets beaten down and I think we’re already into the middle of the match.

Konnan tries to come in but it allows for double teaming on the outside. Rey goes into the barricade and is in trouble. We keep looking at Master P to try desperately to validate paying him. SWEET standing dropkick takes Rey down. After a long beating, Konnan comes in but the referee missed the tag. The beating continues and Rey tries an Asai moonsault which doesn’t work.

Rey finally takes the leg out and there’s the tag to Konnan. Things break down and Hennig messes something up in the corner. I think it was miscommunication or something but it wasn’t all that bad. Bronco Buster hits him (called the Rough Rider here) and Konnan is down on the floor. Barry Windham runs out but one of the No Limit Soldiers runs in and hits Duncum for the pin for Rey.

Rating: C-. Again technically fine, but it would set up more of this feud later. Again though, they had no idea what the face/heel dynamic was supposed to be here and it didn’t really work at all. The match itself was ok, but I’m still not sure why this was on PPV. I’ve watched a little over an hour of this show and nothing at all has jumped out as being anything beyond a Nitro match.

Big pullapart brawl follows and security (one of them being future Natural Born Thriller Reno) breaks it up. Rey gets hogtied in the ring.

Ernest Miller vs. Scott Norton

This isn’t even good enough for Nitro. Apparently it is as this is the fourth or fifth match in a feud. Norton won a bunch to start and then Miller hit him with a crowbar to get the win. And never mind as for some reason, Horace Freaking Hogan comes out and says that since Cat (Miller) hit him on Monday also, Horace, who is in the NWO, gets the shot.

Ernest Miller vs. Horace Hogan

Yes, this match is actually happening. Horace is Hogan’s nephew and a decent looking power guy. He takes over to start but Miller gets in a kick to the face to take over. Now he stands around. Horace gets sent to the floor and Sonny Onoo kicks him a few times. The crowd is DEAD. Horace takes him down with a big boot and a splash gets two. Miller gets dumped to the floor where Onoo loads up the red shoe out of a briefcase. A superkick with it ends this.

Rating: F. Horace Hogan was on a PPV. I don’t think I need to explain why this is a failure.

We’re an hour and twenty minutes into this show and the best match has been the tag match which wasn’t even good enough to be a midcard match on a house show.

We recap Flair vs. Piper which is for the Presidency of the Company. Flair ran the company but the power went to his head so somehow Piper got a match for control of the company. They had this match last month and in some big mess, Piper got control. Even the Horsemen turned on Flair during this.

Ric Flair vs. Roddy Piper

Flair has Anderson and Asya with him. She’s a big bodybuilder and freakish looking and spells her name with a Y instead of an A. Get the joke? They trade chops in the corner and Flair is in trouble early. Piper pounds him down in the corner using his old man punches. Flair Flop and here are more chops. Randy Anderson (referee) blocks a punch and Flair still can’t take over.

Flair bails to the floor and this is going nowhere. Piper punches him down again but a low blow stops him. Arn cheats on the floor and there’s another low blow. Flair’s trunks get pulled down which Tony calls memorable. I call it old hat. Flair gets slammed off the top and Arn gets decked on the floor. A pretty bad looking sunset flip gets two. Off to a sleeper but Flair shoves him off. He pulls out a foreign object and down goes Piper. It gets two and here’s the Figure Four with Arn helping. Cue Bagwell for the save and Flair wins by DQ to become president again.

Rating: D-. Awful match as you would expect from two guys who are combined about 9,000 years old. No idea why they thought these two were the right idea instead of, I don’t know, having Bagwell and someone else as a surrogate for both guys to put the focus on them. That would make sense though and might get someone new up the card and we can’t have that.

Bagwell beats up Flair until Piper turns on him and sides with Flair and Anderson. Piper would become Vice President out of all this.

DJ Ran yells some more. Seriously, why does this guy exist?

We recap Rick Steiner vs. Sting. Tank Abbott is involved in this somehow. They had a cage match and Sting got beaten down by both guys.

Rick Steiner vs. Sting

Steiner is TV Champion and I have no idea if this is for the title or not. Nope it’s non-title. Also it’s No DQ and Falls Count Anywhere. This is new apparently. The interesting thing to do in Steiner matches here are to see how long he’ll actually sell a move for. If it’s over two seconds, he’s feeling generous. Steiner pounds him down but Sting comes back with a dropkick as they go to the floor.

Steiner hammers him some more, this time with a chair. They throw drinks at each other and Sting misses the Splash against the railing as is his custom. Piledriver on the floor gets two. Release German gets two back in the ring. Sting fights back and hits a Vader Bomb. The crowd is DEAD. Big top rope splash gets almost no reaction for two. And since Steiner has done enough, here’s a rest hold. Sting escapes and hits the Splash in the corner. There’s another and Sting hooks the Deathlock but Steiner goes to the ropes.

They head to the floor and it’s all about to fall apart. They fight up to the web location and into the back. The booing commences and Tank Abbott pops up with a towel to choke Sting. And here’s Scott Steiner RELEASING DOEBERMANS AND A ROTTEWEILER ON STING. The camera goes all weird like it’s in a bad horror movie. The dogs jump Sting and this is clearly edited because Scott Steiner is in a different place than he was about two seconds earlier.

Rating: Agoobwa. Yeah, I had to bust that out again. We just saw badly edited footage of dogs attacking Sting. My goodness. This company DESERVED to die. By the way, if you’ve ever been curious as to what I mean when I say something insults my intelligence as a wrestling fan, this is a fine example.

The Steiners come out and demand the referee declare Rick the winner. Whatever man. Oh and they’re both NWO. Great.

We recap the tag title situation. Bigelow/Page beat up Saturn/Raven, the tag champions. Kanyon had to replace Raven but got beaten down also. Page and Bigelow won the belts with ease. Flair, crooked and insane, offered to hook up with Benoit to win the titles. Flair walked out on him and Saturn came out to replace him and they won the titles in a rematch on Thursday. Kanyon joined Page/Bigelow and tonight the Triad gets their rematch.

That’s such backwards booking it makes my head hurt. I’m going to spoil this for you: the Triad gets the titles back here. This takes away the surprise of the match tonight. Now it’s 3-2 against the champions so they’re already against big odds. Instead of having Kanyon join them here where they win the titles, we blow the surprise early and make things less surprising an entertaining as a result. Nice job WCW.

Tag Titles: Chris Benoit/Perry Saturn vs. Diamond Dallas Page/Kanyon

Perry and Chris come out to Malenko’s music for some reason. We’re told Sting is fine from the BIG DOG ATTACK. Benoit vs. Kanyon gets us going. Chris clears the ring and the partners both get tags. The champs clear the ring again but go after Bigelow to let Team Jersey take over. The champs hit almost stereo belly to belly overheads to get control back and it’s officially Page vs. Benoit now.

Page beats him down and it’s off to Kanyon who goes to the middle rope, puts his leg on Benoit’s head, and drives him down with a Fameasser for two. Back to Page and Benoit gets a single suplex for two. Page tries the Helicopter Bomb but it’s more like a regular one instead. A Kanyon moonsault misses and here’s Saturn. He cleans house and hits a frog splash on Kanyon for two.

Saturn gets beaten down again by some good old fashioned double teaming. He tries a sunset flip but Kanyon makes a blind tag and grabs the head of Saturn, exposing Saturn’s back. Page comes in and decks him to take over. Kanyon was freaking smart in the ring man. The beating continues for awhile but Page misses a dive and crotches himself on the top buckle.

That allows for a double tag to bring in Kanyon and Benoit with the crazy Canadian going cracy on the challengers. Kanyon REALLY loudly calls for a suplex where he lands behind Benoit and he does just that. He gets rammed into Bigelow though and Rolling Germans get two. A dragon suplex gets a VERY close two. Benoit hits the Swan Dive as Saturn kind of falls off the top into a Diamond Cutter. Cue Malenko who pulls Saturn out for some reason. Crossface to Kanyon but here’s Bigelow to help with an elevated Cutter and the Triad wins the titles.

Rating: C+. Not bad here but the rematch where the Triad could trade in and out next month at the Bash at the Beach was a much better match. Still though, this was so far and away a better match than anything else all night that I’d rather watch it a dozen times than anything else here. Not bad, but they’ve had better matches.

We recap Nash vs. Savage. Savage snapped and painted Nash’s face with lipstick and makeup. Then there was the Hummer Driver ordeal and a bunch of mud. The Hummer Driver is here with Savage tonight.

WCW World Title: Kevin Nash vs. Randy Savage

Savage has three blondes with him: real life girlfriend Gorgeous George, Madusa and Miss Madness (Molly Holly). The big elbow has been unbanned. Well that’s good to know. Nash’s ribs are messed up. The champ (Nash) hammers him down and hooks the side slam but can’t follow up. Savage goes after the ribs and things slow WAY down. Savage was just a name at this point and wasn’t anywhere near his usual self in the ring.

If you weren’t paying attention, this is very dull stuff. It’s just Savage hitting him in the ribs to soften them up for an elbow attempt later. The girls keep cheating, including a missile dropkick from Molly. The elbow hits but it only gets two, mainly because we’re like 3 minutes into the match. Nash comes back with Snake Eyes and the big boot. Jackknife hits and the girls run in but it isn’t a DQ somehow. Then SID FREAKING VICIOUS returns from not being seen in mainstream wrestling in almost two years (he was in ECW for like 2 sips of coffee but I wouldn’t call that mainstream) to beat up Nash for the DQ.

Rating: F. If this was the main event of a show, I’d ask for my money back even if I didn’t pay a dime to get in, which was a common occurrence for a lot of the fans at this time. The Sid run-in was a legit shocker, but getting to that point was just dreadful. I have no idea who thought this was a good idea, but what do I know?

Overall Rating: -F. As in we’ve gone so low that we’ve went past Z into negative letters. This was HORRIBLE and easily one of the worst PPVs I’ve ever seen. Not only did the main event suck, the best match is just ok and ran longer than it needed to. Plus, the dogs man. That ranks right up there with the dumbest things I’ve ever seen in wrestling. Combining that with guys like Van Hammer and Brian Knobbs being on PPV and how in the world could this be anything but horrible?a

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Clash of the Champions 11: Coastal Crush
Date: June 13, 1990
Location: McAlister Field House, Charleston, South, Carolina
Attendance: 4,100
Commentators: Jim Ross, Bob Caudle

This is right before the Great American Bash which is where Sting grabbed thr brass ring and got his first world title. The main event is Junkyard Dog vs. Flair and I have no idea why. Anyway, this is mainly a nothing show, but we also get some Steiners vs. Doom awesomeness so I can’t complain there. Let’s get to it.

The Southern Boys say they’re ready for the Freebirds.

The Birds respond by singing their own theme music.

Southern Boys vs. Freebirds

This is the Southern Boys’ (Steve Armstrong and Tracy Smothers) national debut. The Birds jump them which doesn’t work out all that well for them. Smothers and Garvin officially start us off. Smothers gets beaten down in the corner but breaks through and draws the Birds in for Steve to hit a top rope cross body to take them both out. Things settle down a bit and Garvin takes over on Armstrong.

Back to Hayes who works over the arm. This is a pretty basic match so far but nothing has been all that bad. Elbow gets two for Hayes and it’s back to the arm. The arena they’re in is on the campus on the Citadel whose coach won some award the day of this show so it’s nice timing. In other words, there’s not much to talk about here so I’m repeating what JR says. Armstrong finally breaks through to make a tag to Smothers and he cleans house. Everything breaks down and Garvin covers Smothers but Steve comes off the top with a flying headbutt and puts Tracy on top for the big upset.

Rating: C+. Great example here of what you do to start a show. They had a fast paced match with a hot ending and that’s all you need to do to start a show. I enjoyed it, even though there wasn’t much to it. That being said, at times that’s all you need to do and it was a very fine opener.

Tommy Rich vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Bigelow looks strange sleeveless. Rich hammers away to start but runs into the size and power game. Tommy, who used to be world champion while Bigelow never war, works on the arm and gets a rollup for one. Bam Bam just goes off, tossing Rich all over the place and then choking past five for the DQ. Bigelow wasn’t in WCW long if I remember right.

Rating: D-. This was pretty much nothing but a way for Bigelow to look dominant. I don’t remember him in 1990 at all and I know he wasn’t on most of the PPVs later in the year at all. I’ve checked and this and Capital Combat were the only two major shows he was on all year. It was an NWA/Japan thing so he went to Japan for good for a few years until he went back to the WWF in late 92.

A man is coming. His name is Vader. He’ll debut at the Bash.

This guy will be as well: El Gigante. He has an interview with Gary Michael Capetta of all people. It’s in Spanish because Gigante can’t speak much English. I speak enough Spanish to understand it but thankfully they translate it.

Samoan Swat Team vs. Mike Rotunda/Z-Man

Rotunda is Captain Mike here which is post Varsity Club for him. The Swat Team is Fatu and Samoan Savage, who is better known as Tama from the Islanders. Rotunda vs. Fatu gets us going and the Samoan is knocked to the floor. Off to Z-Man who dropkicks Fatu to the floor again. Back to Rotundo who gets a cross body for two. The Samoans cheat to take over. Oddly enough they don’t have a manager which is rare for the wild savages.

Rotunda gets caught and beaten down. By the way, changing the last letter of his name is intentional. You’ll hear it as either depending on what year it is. Nerve hold goes on and Bob Caudle says it’s like hitting a mule in the head with a 2×4. Can someone call PETA? Rotundo gets beaten down on the floor but comes back with a double clothesline to take over. Z-Man comes in and misses most of the kicks that are sold anyway. Savage hits a Vader Bomb but the faces switch (WHAT?) and Rotunda steals a small package win.

Rating: D+. I’m in awe over that ending. One: Rotunda has shorter hair. Two: He’s in black, Z-Man was in white. Three: They don’t look alike. Four: FATU LOOKED STRAIGHT AT HIM FOR THREE SECONDS. The match was ok other than that though, and it was fine for the spot it had on here which was just a five and a half minute filler.

Video on Mean Mark.

Mean Mark vs. Brian Pillman

For those of you unfamiliar with Mark, I’ll save his reveal to the end of the match. Mark has Dangerously with him and jumps Pillman to start. He’s a big monster and that’s about the extent of his character. Oh and he’s mean. Pillman tries to use speed but Mark just kicks him down like he’s nothing. Crucifix doesn’t work at all and Mark stomps away. Off to a chinlock and Mark is so new he can’t even do that right. An elbow in the corner misses but Brian can’t get anything going. Mark knocks him to the apron but he skins the cat and hits a missile dropkick. And then they botch the ending off an Irish whip so Mark hot shots him for the pin.

Rating: D. Boring match here but it set up Mark for his US Title shot at the Bash. His finisher was the Heart Punch which is exactly what it sounds like. Mark would only appear like 5 times in the NWA before his final appearance at the Bash. He would be in the WWF in November as an unhurtable monster called Kane. That was just his first name. His occupation was an undertaker. He soon dropped the first name and just went by his job title.

US Tag Titles: Rock N Roll Express vs. Midnight Express

The Midnights have the belts. That Midnight song is just AWESOME. Eaton vs. Gibson to get us started. These two teams probably wrestled about a thousand times so they’ll have a decent match just by muscle memory. The problem here is that they’re getting old which makes that a little bit harder. They spend a few minutes working on getting to a lockup. Off to Lane who does a little better with his kicks.

Gibson kicks him in the head to knock him back down. Off to Morton and my goodness the hair gel bills in this match could bankrupt a small country. These two are called the cream of the crop by JR and I can’t say I agree. They’re moving fast here but somehow it’s still in first gear. Nothing here is anything interesting at all. Morton finally gets a rana to speed things up but the Midnights have a meeting instead of keeping things going.

Off to Eaton but Morton escapes the corner again and grabs the arm again. The Midnights can’t get anything going here. Morton tries another armdrag but Bobby punches him down to finally give the Midnights the advantage. Morton counters a superplex in mid-air but Lane breaks up a rollup. Everything breaks down and the challengers hit stereo rollups for stereo twos.

Things slow down again and Eaton hits a suplex to Morton before bringing Lane back in. Off to Eaton quickly but he misses a charge in the corner and Gibson comes in for probably the last tag of the match for his team. Morton and Eaton go to the floor as Gibson goes after the legs. Off to a sleeper instead but Bobby breaks it up which gets two for Eaton. Everything breaks down again and the double dropkick takes Eaton down. Lane breaks the cover up….and that’s a DQ. Seriously?

Rating: C. This was one of the weakest Express Collisions I’ve seen in a very long time. Granted it probably had a lot to do with them getting later into their mainstream careers. Not much to see here but the Midnights would lose the titles soon and they would be retired before too long, which was probably the right idea.

Doug Furnas vs. Barry Windham

Furnas is billed as the World’s Strongest Man. Windham is a Horseman. Furnas runs Barry down and JR is talking about football. Sunset flip gets two for Doug and Barry bails. Furnas kind of botches a backflip off the top and doesn’t quite get Barry up for a gorilla press. Clothesline gets two. Barry gets his knee up and takes Doug’s head off with a clothesline. JR can’t stop praising Furnas to get on to the match. Powerslam gets two for Furnas. They hit the ropes for a bit and Barry grabs a belly to back and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: C-. Decent power match here but nothing too great. Furnas went to Japan soon after this so he didn’t mean all that much. Windham was a Horseman for a few more years but mainly did tag team stuff. He has a really forgettable career around this time actually. Not much here but it was ok.

Sid (after being told to go by the director) says he’ll take out Luger.

Lex Luger vs. Sid Vicious

Sid jumps him to start and but Lex hits a clothesline and pins him in like 20 seconds.

World Tag Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Doom

The Steiners had been unstoppable but Doom had shocked the world and won the titles at a PPV called Capital Combat. Doom has the old Ron Simmons’ music which is still awesome. The masks are gone too. Ron vs. Scott gets us going. Scott busts out something I’ve never seen before: a floatover fallaway slam. It isn’t really falling away either as he doesn’t let go. Both Doomers take one and the ring is cleared.

A Steiner Line to the back of the head puts Simmons down and it’s off to Reed. Scott throws him around too. I can easily see why they were thinking he was the heir apparent to the world title here. You know, except for the whole Sting guy. Rick comes in now but Nick Patrick gets in the way and Ron gets in a right hand. Rick is like cool man and hits a belly to belly to send Ron flying.

Now it’s Rick’s turn to beat up Doom on his own. Reed FINALLY goes to the eyes to take over. They go back to the Doom corner and Rick fights back out of it with ease. On the floor Doom gets it together and takes Rick down via a clothesline. Simmons beats on Rick back inside and you can really tell that Doom isn’t that experienced yet. While Scott is with the referee Rick gets tossed to the floor. Reed comes in and drops a middle rope elbow for two.

Reed misses a running knee into the corner and Rick hits a double axe off the middle rope. Back to Scott and things speed way up again. Everything breaks down and Teddy throws in a foreign object. Scott takes Simmons down with a superplex but Reed clocks him with the object. Rick covers Simmons at the same time and it’s a double pin, but Scott was legal so Doom wins it.

Rating: C. These two could have good matches every time they went out there and this worked well enough. Doom would hold the titles longer than any team in the history of WCW, now losing them until February of the next year to the Freebirds who lost them to the Steiners before they won them from Doom. And yes that’s accurate.

JYD says he’ll win.

Paul Orndorff says he’ll beat Anderson.

Paul Orndorff vs. Arn Anderson

I don’t remember Orndorff around this time at all. He’s a face and Anderson is by definition a Horseman. Anderson is TV Champion but this is non-title. Slow start with Paul working on a headlock. Make that a sleeper. Now it’s a figure four. You know that’s going to get a pop in the south. After the leg is slammed into the post, Anderson hooks the spinebuster to break the momentum.

Orndorff gets a sunset flip and pulls the trunks down which thankfully is on a different camera side. Off to an abdominal stretch. Arn finally gets caught grabbing the ropes and we go to a chinlock instead. Orndorff comes back with punches and things speed up a bit. It’s still not all that interesting though. Anderson gets the knees up but Orndorff reverses a small package for the pin.

Rating: D. Just a dull match here but I’ve never liked Orndoff’s stuff at all. Well his stuff with Hogan was good but his WCW stuff always bored me. I think it’s more that he had one incredible feud and that was about it for him. Boring match and Orndorff never got the title I don’t think.

The Horsemen say that they’ll win the main event tonight and Flair will keep the title. This was pretty rambling though.

NWA World Title: Junkyard Dog vs. Ric Flair

JYD gets a full jazz band intro. He takes Flair down with a right hand and is trying to keep this basic, which is probably smart for someone of his intellect. There the on all fours headbutt. A punch puts Flair on the ramp and we get a Flair Flop. Back in a few chops are no sold. A punch in the corner gets the same result. Now a knee drop is no sold. Ok we get it: he has a hard head.

Now they stand around for awhile because that’s been done a few times already in this match, so let’s do it again. Dog punches him again and there’s Flair Flop #2. Ole distracts the referee so Flair hits JYD in the head with a chair. Guess how much it’s sold. The answer would be NONE. Flair jumps into a punch and this is really quite bad. Flair hits a knee to the back…and then gets slammed off the top. He pounds away and the Horsemen run in for the DQ.

Rating: F+. This was just bad. I have no idea what the point in making JYD look so strong was but it didn’t really work at all. Flair didn’t get anything more than a few chops here and there and it made him look awful. This didn’t work at all and the champ looked like a joke. He would lose the title in a few weeks, but man at least make him look strong beforehand.

Sting and his boys clear the ring and Sting stalks Flair to the back.

After a break, Rocky King yells about the Horsemen. Thankfully someone intelligent sounding (Sting) talks quickly and says he wants Flair. Their title match hadn’t been announced yet. He suggests the Bash for the shot and says he’ll beg if he has to. The Horsemen come back and it winds up being Sting vs. Flair in the ring as everyone else is held back. Sting pounds on Flair as the credits roll.

Overall Rating: C-. Not the best show ever but I’ve seen a lot worse. The problem is that the wrestling is ok, but it’s not really interesting. You had a bunch of matches on here that ran about five minutes and that really isn’t enough to get some interest going for things. This didn’t really set up the Bash. Almost all of these people were on the PPV but their matches weren’t announced here. Not much to see but it’s nothing horrible.

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Impact Wrestling
Date: December 22, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

We’re back with week #2 of the wild card tournament but at least now we know who almost all of the wacky partners are. The show last week was pretty ok so hopefully they crank it up a bit more this week as the year comes to a close. We’ve got I think three more Impacts before the PPV where it’s pretty likely that Jeff gets the title back. Oh and the Jarretts are gone at the moment. Let’s get to it.

The opening video recaps last week which is the norm now.

Here are Roode and Ray to open the show. Roode is in a suit and to be fair, he’s rocking that thing. He says he loves Christmas and the fans can all thank him for the gifts they got last week. Sting and Hardy getting beaten up was great and all they needed were bows on them. Ray talks about how giving he is: he gives chicken bones to the homeless, he gives dollars to strippers and he gives whiskey to his cat.

Roode talks about learning that every action has a consequence. Lately he’s learned that he’s probably on the naughty lists of both Sting and Santa. He asks Sting to come out here and get his suspension over with because he needs time off for Christmas. Instead he gets Hardy. Don’t worry about the suspension because in three weeks, Hardy is taking the title. Tonight it’s the two of them against Hardy and a partner of his choice. This would be a little more suspenseful if they hadn’t mentioned this in the preview before the show. Of course it’s Sting. Here he is and he has the insane face paint on again.

The main event tag is officially a street fight.

Wildcard Tag Tournament First Round: AJ Styles/Kazarian vs. Rob Van Dam/Christopher Daniels

And remember, the teams are RANDOM! I mean, no one would take rivals and put them against stable mates. That would be STUPID! Tenay says Fourtune is officially defunct. Kaz vs. Van Dam to start us off. They hit the mat quickly and it’s off to AJ. Daniels wants him but Van Dam says he’s mine.

After some basic stuff it’s back to Kaz who seems to have better chemistry with RVD. Monkey flip by Rob sets up a headlock by Kaz. Back to AJ and Van Dam goes to the corner. He rams into Daniels and that counts as a tag. Daniels comes in and misses AJ, allowing the tag to Kaz. Van Dam slaps Daniels into the Fade To Black for the pin at 5:18.

Rating: D+. Basic but fine here and that’s all it needed to be. Thankfully they didn’t push Van Dam and Daniels as a team that lucks its way into the second round. Either way, this was ok but it wasn’t anything special. That goes for a lot of first round tournament matches most of the time though so there isn’t much to complain about there.

Anthony Nese says he’s awesome and can hang with anyone.

Zema Ion says he’s pretty.

Zema Ion vs. Anthony Nese

This is the second match in the best of three series with Ion up 1-0. Ion has hairspray so you know he’s a heel. The winner of this is in a four way against Aries, Kash and Sorensen. Ion dives through the ropes to take Nese out with a dropkick before the bell. Back in Nese snaps off a rana for two. Cross body gets the same. Ion gets in a shot but Nese fights back and hits a Lionsault for two.

The American hits a German on the Filipino for two. Nese misses a springboard body block for two and Ion takes over again. Nese jumps from the mat to the top for a super rana for two. Ion hits a spinning facebuster but pulls Nese up like he did last week. Naturally it allows Nese to nip up into a rollup for the pin at 4:00.

Rating: C+. Not bad but the problem is the lack of any reason to care about these guys or the match they had. Nese is a generic face and Ion is a generic heel. The match was fine and they did some good stuff, but I’ve seen a match like this a thousand times and I’ve seen it better a few hundred times. That’s the problem with these cruiserweight matches: it’s REALLY hard to top them and when they’re average, they look weak.

Madison Rayne is in a referee dress and says Karen put her in charge of the Knockouts.

Pope says he’s there for people when they need him. What D-Von didn’t get is that Pope is a better trainer than he is so let him train. He’ll always be pimping too. D-Von vs. Pope at Genesis again. D-Von comes in and grabs him but one of his kids hits him in the back. Pope calls them his boys.

Eric Young and D-Von are on a date because they’re in the wild card tournament together. One of their opponents is Shannon Moore and Eric locks up with a referee.

Here’s Madison and she calls out Tara and Tessmacher. She shouts a lot and the fans chant what sounds like USA. Madison repeats that she’s the head of the Knockouts which surprises Mike and Taz, even though she said it earlier. Her job is to destroy the Knockouts and she’s starting with the two of them. Their closeness makes her sick so they’re fighting each other tonight and she’s the referee.

Brooke Tessmacher vs. Tara

And it’s a comedy match. They do the slowest wristlock this side of Delirious and Tara shouts ouchie. They trade some very weak covers and this is kind of amusing. The limited wrestling turns into talking and even the Impact Zone is silent. They finally get into a fight and Madison won’t count due to reasons of waving. Madison shouts at them to hit someone so they hit her. And then the Tebow it. Ok then. It ran about 6 minutes but there wasn’t exactly an ending point.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t exactly a wrestling match. I’m not sure what it was but the girls were hot so I’ll let it go.

Sting and Hardy say they’ll win.

Eric looks for a gift to give ODB and looks through the kitchen of the restaurant.

Here’s Storm to FINALLY give us something interesting. He says that Angle is looking for him but Storm will either be in the bar or in the ring. Angle gave him a beating but Storm won in the end. He makes football references and drops Tebow’s name. Angle pops up on the screen and is in Storm’s hometown. He insults a woman and that’s about it.

Ray says he and Roode will win.

Wildcard Tag Tournament First Round: Eric Young/ODB vs. Anarquia/Shannon Moore

Young vs. Anarquia to start us up and Eric dances a lot. Young locks up with the Mexican America chicks outside and then disrobes. Anarquia comes in and slams Eric. It’s off to ODB and Moore bails. ODB kind of slams him and Eric hits a top rope elbow. A low blow by ODB gets the pin at 4:36.

Rating: F. What. Ever. Man. I’m so over Eric and his unfunny comedy but TNA insists we need to see it time after time on every show.

Matt Morgan and Crimson recap the tag tournament. They don’t take it seriously it seems.

Angle beats up people in Tennessee. He pulls out a freaking cap gun and hits someone in the head with it. He superkicks a lot of them after standing them up in a line. Angle even throws the Christmas tree at someone. He challenges Storm for Genesis.

Bully Ray/Bobby Roode vs. Sting/Jeff Hardy

This is a street fight and they have a ton of time. I wonder if Sting vs. Ray is going to happen at Genesis. Probably not. Those two head to the floor and Roode takes over in the ring on Hardy. They go split screen for a bit but the painted guys clear the ring. STEREO DIVES take the heels out. Sting diving like that was pretty awesome. That takes us to a break.

Back with more violence and the bad guys in trouble. Ray hits Hardy with a kendo stick to the back and does the same to Sting. We get the dreaded cookie sheet and Ray takes over on Sting. Sting fights back and hits a superplex to take Ray down. He’s showing off tonight. Roode comes in to beat down the guy with the full facepaint (Sting) but Sting comes back again. He loads up the splash but Ray hits him with part of a wooden sign to break it up.

Ray drops an elbow for two. Hardy hasn’t been focused on in this match very much. Ray and Roode set for something but Sting ducks so Ray clotheslines Roode. Death Drop to Ray but Sting walks into a spinebuster. Hardy comes in and takes out Roode but Ray kicks his head off. Ray gets the table but Sting moves it before Hardy can go through it. He cleans house and hooks the Scorpion on Ray (who taps but it doesn’t count) and puts Roode down with a Death Drop. Another table is set up and Hardy splashes Roode through it for the pin at 18:20.

Rating: B. This knew that it was supposed to be an over the top and fun brawl and that’s what it was. There wasn’t really anything all that significant going on here but it did the job in giving Hardy the pin over Roode. Also it gave Sting a chance to look awesome as he’s limited in the ring anymore and that’s fine. Fun match and a good way to close the show.

Overall Rating: C-. I don’t want to say this show was bad, because it really wasn’t. It was however pretty meh. It came off a lot like Raw on Monday as a throwaway show, and for the most part I’m ok with that. However, stuff like the Knockouts and Eric Young got really old really fast. The main event was fun and there was kind of an energy to the show that helped it, but not one of their better episodes. Still though, it’s a holiday kind of show so taking things less seriously might be a good idea.

Results
Kazarian/AJ Styles b. Rob Van Dam/Christopher Daniels – Fade To Black to Daniels
Anthony Nese b. Zema Ion – Rollup
Tara vs. Brooke Tessmacher went to a no contest
Eric Young/ODB b. Anarquia/Shannon Moore – Low blow to Anarquia
Jeff Hardy/Sting b. Robert Roode/Bully Ray – Splash through a table to Roode

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Monday Nitro #58
Date: October 21, 1996
Location: Mankato Civic Center, Mankato, Minnesota
Attendance: 4,034
Commentators: Eric Bischoff, Bobby Heenan, Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Larry Zbyszko

It’s FINALLY the last show before Halloween Havoc which took forever to get to. The main event tonight is Benoit vs. Savage which should be good, although it probably won’t be up to their capabilities due to the whole Liz thing from last week. This should be a better show than last week’s which was nothing all that interesting. Let’s get to it.

We open with talking about Savage and the Liz tape from last week. Larry reiterates that WCW needs a leader.

Chris Jericho vs. Bobby Eaton

Should be good. Tony says Sting is here and has a match scheduled with JL. Syxx and NWO Sting are here. After a break we’re ready to go. Patrick is referee and is still hurt. Jericho speeds things up to start and hits a dropkick and shoulder block to control early. Eaton comes back with a bad powerslam for no cover. Jericho hits the springboard dropkick to put Eaton outside. If Jericho wasn’t so pale I’d think he was the Cheetah Kid from last week.

Eaton works on the arm back in the ring. They slug it out and this match probably needs to end soon. They’re just not clicking out there. Jericho sends him into the post and they hit the floor. The Canadian’s elbow hits the post but Eaton misses a shot and stumbles up the aisle. Back in and Eaton hooks a swinging neckbreaker for no cover. A top rope kneedrop mostly hits for two. Jericho hits something like a jumping superkick and then a missile dropkick for the pin.

Rating: D+. Really surprising here as the match didn’t click at all for the most part. The ending was a lot better but other than that they looked totally out of sync. Jericho would get a lot better and I don’t think Eaton would be around much longer after this. Jericho would get Syxx on Sunday.

Jericho says that in six days he’ll get the first win over the NWO. He actually would, but it wouldn’t be until World War 3.

Video on Mysterio and how awesome he is.

Dean Malenko vs. Jimmy Graffiti

Graffiti is more commonly known as Jimmy Del Ray of the Heavenly Bodies. Graffiti takes over early and looks pretty stupid in his shirt with the word Graffiti on it and jean shorts. A Batista Bomb gets two for Graffiti as does a superkick. Malenko comes back and knocks him to the floor where he lands on the top of his head. Fake Sting is watching this and filming it. This prompts Tony and Larry to discuss if Rey has joined the NWO.

Dean hits a clothesline in the corner and a suplex but the Cloverleaf is broken up. Graffiti gets in his bit of jobber offense and they both go to the floor off a Malenko cross body. Back in and Graffiti tries something resembling a dropkick but gets caught in a powerbomb kind of move. The Cloverleaf ends this clean. It gets the Power Pin of the Week which is a sponsorship thing despite it not being a pin.

Rating: C-. Just a long squash here as Graffiti was never any threat to Deano Machino. I really don’t know why they brought in Del Ray of all people but he was fine for a jobber role I suppose. Dean would get the title back from Rey on Sunday before losing it to Ultimo Dragon at Starrcade.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Craig Pittman

We get a montage of Diamond Cutters before the match. Teddy is with Pittman here. He really didn’t have a good group of guys around this time. Teddy and Patrick get in an argument about 2 seconds after the bell rings. Page rams Pittman into Long to take over quickly. This has all the makings of a squash. Page pancakes him down for two. Pittman kicks out and shoves Page onto Patrick, injuring the referee’s back to a big pop. Out to the floor for a bit where Pittman works on the arm. Code Red (cross armbreaker) goes on but Teddy distracts the referee for no apparent reason. Diamond Cutter ends this.

After the too short to rate match, Teddy is accused of being NWO. He yells at Patrick and Patrick says it was Teddy’s fault, which is true.

Tony talks to Nick who says he didn’t hear Page give up. He’s accused of being the NWO referee again and he says it’s Randy Anderson again.

We look back at two weeks ago where Flair was attacked to write him off TV for his legit shoulder injury. We also see Jarrett challenging the Giant for Havoc.

Ron Studd vs. Jeff Jarrett

Flair comes out to watch this match. He gets in the ring before it starts and tells Jarrett to strut. The fans aren’t all that thrilled. Flair struts and gets cheered, so they do it again. Ric shakes Jarrett’s hand and that’s that. The match actually starts now and Studd is a giant. Jarrett manages a suplex and a bad figure four ends this.

Jarrett says it’s time for WCW to band together to take out the NWO. Also Giant won’t be able to chokeslam him. Flair comes up and says that he’ll be back to get his revenge for his injury.

Hour #2 begins. The announcers talk as usual.

Lex Luger vs. Roadblock

Roadblock weighs about 400lbs. He goes right after Luger and that doesn’t work all that well for him. A clothesline sends Roadblock to the floor and he’s rammed into various metal things. Back in Luger slams him but can’t hit the jumping elbow. In an inset interview, Anderson says that time is running out on Lex and he’ll make him quit Sunday. A kneedrop gets two for Roadblock. Luger starts Hulking Up and calls for the Rack but drops the big guy twice. The third time works and Roadblock insta-taps.

Rating: D+. Just a basic power match for a hero to show off like Luger did here. Roadblock was another huge guy that did practically nothing while the other guys would beat him up and it was supposed to be impressive. I think Luger would beat Anderson on Sunday in one of Anderson’s last big time matches.

Buy the NWO Shirt!

Lee Marshall is in Phoenix and Nitro is there next week. Why did they keep doing that? I still don’t get it.

Harlem Heat vs. American Males

Eric talks about the Braves beating New York tonight, which he says needs to become a tradition. It’s a jab at Vince so Heenan cracks up. Eric says this is non title but Patrick holds up the titles anyway. More WWF jabs as Riggs vs. Ray starts us off. Power vs. speed here with the power team taking over, hitting a World’s Strongest Slam to put Riggs down. Bagwell comes in and we talk about Savage a bit.

Marcus throws Stevie over the top but it’s momentum or whatever despite Bagwell THROWING HIM OVER THE ROPES. We take a break and come back with Booker getting worked over by Bagwell. Booker powerbombs him down and the Outsiders are here. The NWO wants Nitro apparently. Stevie pounds away and since that’s the extent of his offense it’s back to Booker. The Hangover misses and here’s Riggs again. Everything breaks down and Riggs goes after the Heat’s managers, allowing the Harlem Side Kick to end him.

Rating: D. This was really boring as the Heat seemed completely uninterested. The Males would be split up next month as Bagwell would turn heel for the first of about 8,000 times. This wasn’t much of a match and it wasn’t very good, primarily due to Booker having to do all of the work for his team.

Faces of Fear vs. Fantastics

The Fantastics? REALLY? They brought these guys out of mothballs? Don’t get me wrong: they were my favorite 80s NWA tag team so I’m not complaining, but this is late 1996. This falls under the category of Greg Valentine. This would be their only WCW match too. Fulton chops away at Meng and he’s like dude….no. The announcers talk about Savage some more and they’re not sure if he’s here, despite him being scheduled for the main event.

A double dropkick puts Meng on one knee and the announcers say that the Fantastics have no chance in this. Eric keeps telling us the Braves score because that’s required for some reason. Fulton tries to fight back and Eric laughs when he punches and kicks. A piledriver kills him dead but Fulton makes the save. The double headbutt hits and Eric is all happy because Sting might be here. Hot tag brings in Rogers and he gets in some offense but his cross body gets caught and a big boot from Meng ends this.

Rating: D-. I love the Fantastics, but I have NO idea what they were thinking bringing them in here. They looked old and pale and the Faces of Fear destroyed them. It was a total squash and Eric was burying them on commentary. It’s not like they were a regular team either. This was their only match in WCW and I think Rogers would go to ECW for awhile. I don’t get this one at all.

Remember that Liz video that Eric was afraid messed Savage up? Let’s watch it again, because that’ll get Randy’s head straight right? Liz still loves him is the point of this. Eric says he has more footage for later.

JL vs. Sting

And it’s the NWO Sting. The whole NWO comes out to watch. A few fans are fooled for a bit but it becomes clear what’s going on pretty quickly. The NWO comes out of the crowd sans Hogan. Total squash and the Deathlock looks to end it in like a minute, but the REAL Sting comes out. He’s in all black and has white facepaint. The match is thrown out.

Sting debuts the Death Drop and he destroys the Fake Sting. The NWO lets this happen so everyone thinks Sting is NWO. He hooks the Deathlock and the NWO comes in. DiBiase offers him a spot on the team and the whole team tries to tempt him. Eric is WAY too intense about this. I get that it’s supposed to be serious but he gets all melodramatic about it.

Hall asks a legit question: what does Sting have to show for carrying the WCW banner this whole time? Sting talks about the Fake Sting and says the real version may or may not be in their price range. The only thing for sure about him is that nothing’s for sure. He leaves and you can hear the money being printed from here.

Chris Benoit vs. Randy Savage

Eric has left to try to flag down Savage. Here’s Savage but he’s all in black and they’re “street clothes”. I’m not sure what street people walk down looking like that but I don’t think I want to be there. Eric apologizes and rolls some tape. It’s from the 3 Ninjas movie set with Hogan hosting things for lack of a better term. Hogan talks to the director and says he has a lot of things he needs to do and that it can’t go over budget.

The NWO takes over production of the film. Giant is the new director, Hogan is producing and Liz has a cameo. Hogan makes Liz say she loves Randy. Hogan is in a wig here and it’s really not working for him. This is really bad. Hogan sends Liz to his trailer with Giant escorting her. Hogan comes into the trailer and yells at her. He and Giant talk a bit more to end this.

Back in the arena Savage isn’t sure what to do. There’s no match of course. Savage says it just occurred to him how fragile friendships and relationships can be. Business and marriages can be fragile too. Life is also fragile and with that Savage leaves. Eric calls him back…and that’s it.

Overall Rating: D-. Really weak show here, which is the second in a row. Havoc sucked and the Savage vs. Hogan match was a big reason why. It wound up being a comedy match and Savage was just fine after the last two weeks of him being all mopey and depressed. This built up the PPV a bit but overall, there wasn’t much here. At least we don’t have to hear the words Slim Jim’s every 8 seconds now.

Here’s Halloween Havoc if you’re interested:

http://forums.wrestlezone.com/showthread.php?p=2182496#post2182496

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