Impact Wrestling
Date: January 19, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

We’re moving closer to Against All Odds after last week’s pretty awesome show. Well at least the second hour was. Tonight there’s a big match and it’s actually been advertised. I’m as shocked as you are. It’s a cage match between Mickie James and Madison Rayne to probably blow off their feud stemming from Karen being all evil and crazy. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the ending from last week’s show.

Here’s Storm to open things up. He likes being #1 contender and he beat the best in the world to do it. Angle may be the best, but on those nights, Storm was that much better. Now he’s got Roode at Against All Odds….and here’s Hardy for a rebuttal. He says he got screwed at the PPV and then again last week. Storm isn’t getting a title shot until Hardy does. They both say they got screwed. Storm: “With all that screwing he must have a lot of child support to pay.”

Here’s Roode who says Storm does in fact get the winner of Hardy vs. Roode, but since there’s no winner, Storm isn’t #1 contender anymore. Hardy got two chances in 5 days and blew them both, so he’s out too. This brings out Sting who says Roode found another loophole. Therefore tonight it’s Storm vs. Hardy and the winner gets Roode at the PPV.

Angelina rants about Eric Young a bit and challenges him to a match later tonight.

Gunner vs. AJ Styles

The announcers keep pushing the idea that Gunner has injured a lot of people. AJ does his usual stuff to start, such as the drop down into a dropkick. Gunner takes over and Tazz actually brings up Flair and AJ’s past relationship. Jumping knee to the face gets two for Gunner. Gunner controls for a bit but AJ comes back with the springboard forearm. Here come Kaz and Daniels with Daniels telling Kaz to do what he’s supposed to do. F5 is countered and Flair pops up on the apron. The distraction lets Kaz deck AJ and a DDT from Gunner gets the pin at 4:45.

Rating: C-. Just a match basically to further whatever is going on with Daniels and Kaz. Kaz being so reluctant is an interesting story but I’d like it to not be Daniels. I mean….it’s been done. Like A LOT. Anyway, decent match and it’s amazing what a character trait did for Gunner. Why did it take them over a year to do it?

Gunner goes for the concrete but AJ gets away.

Magnus is ready for Crimson. Crimson and Morgan come up and Crimson threatens Magnus. Morgan says save it for the ring.

Ray is with Sting and demands a world title match since he hasn’t lost since being a singles wrestler. Sting says no and make an appointment the next time you want to talk to me. Ray kind of threatens him…I think. Sting even lifts the glasses and Ray is mad.

Magnus vs. Crimson

No seconds with either guy. Magnus jumps him to start and hits a clothesline for two. And never mind as Red Sky (a bad one) ends this at 1:10.

Joe comes out post match and beats down Crimson. Morgan finally makes the save. He gets beaten down too and Joe/Magnus stand tall.

Eric young is fascinated by Bellator. A caterer comes up and Eric annoys her by thinking she’s a fighter. He says he doesn’t fight women. ODB comes up and talks about Angelina’s challenge and Eric isn’t happy. Sex is implied.

We get a clip from last week with the Bischoff Hour. Garrett is shown training. He says we’ll find out who’s training him soon.

We recap Mickie vs. Madison. I’m not sure this warrants a cage match but it’s not bad.

Madison freaks out and Gail says let’s just go to the ring.

Mickie James vs. Madison Rayne

Mickie starts fast and rams her into the buckle to start. Powerbomb out of the corner hits and we’re officially longer than the Lockdown match from last year. Seated dropkick gets a delayed two. Mickie hooks something like a choke and Madison is in trouble. Madison escapes and hits a HARD kick to take over. That sounded great. Mickie reverses a whip and we take a break.

Back with Mickie in control again. This has been pretty one sided so far. Mickie takes her down and nips up but Madison sends her into the cage to take over. Madison humps the mat with Mickie’s head between her legs. Somehow that’s a lot less hot than you would expect. Off to the chinlock. Madison has a little American flag patch on her shorts. Not sure why but it looks good there.

Mickie fights up and a neckbreaker from James puts both of them down. They slug it out, won by Mickie. A flying forearm and clothesline put Madison down. Another flapjack attempt is countered and a boot gets two for Rayne. And then Mickie rams her into the cage a few times and the jumping DDT gets the pin at 12:23.

Rating: C. Not bad here but nothing classic. It’s so much better in this division than the Divas, and a lot of that is due to the time. The Divas matches get annoying because they’re just there and gone so fast that they don’t mean anything. The Knockouts don’t have masterpieces but they have matches, which is a big step in the right direction.

Austin Aries talks about what he’s going to talk about and how entertaining he is. I didn’t leave anything out there: he says he’s going to talk about something and how interesting whatever he’ll be saying will be without saying what it is.

Velvet and Tara congratulate Mickie. She says she’s hardcore or something. No idea what the point of this was.

Hardy says that the world title is what it takes to validate everything.

Video on Aries and his domination of the X Division. He talks about how dominant he is and says he needs competition.

Here’s Aries in the arena. He says it’s that time of the month: it’s time for him to brag about being the best in the world after another successful title defense. If he sucks like the audience says, why does he still have this title? There’s no one here to take me on, so maybe he should go around the world to find competition. Cue the returning Alex Shelley, once again with the skunk hair.

He talks about the Guns being injured and how he came back the day Sabin hurt his knee. Shelley wanted to wait on Sabin to get back but Aries has bored him so much that he had to come back. Last time it took a low blow for Aries to beat him. Aries says go wait for Sabin to come back because there’s no point to doing anything else. Shelley says if he’s such a non-threat, Aries should have no issue giving him a title match. Aries says whoa whoa whoa, but you have to earn it. Go find an X Division guy and beat them, then you get your show. Shelley says Aries can pick it.

ODB wants Angelina to get destroyed tonight. Winter jumps her and they brawl with ODB seemingly in control. Winter gets in a shot with a metal something and then whips ODB with a belt.

Angelina Love vs. Eric Young

Let’s get this over with. Eric isn’t sure what to do so he locks up with the referee. Then with a fan. Then he jumps back in. Then he locks up with the referee again. The referee is shoved into Angelina in the corner and Eric counts to four for a near DQ. Angelina kicks him low for the DQ at 1:57. Oh….just no.

ODB with the save but she gets beaten down. Eric sends both evil ones to the floor. ODB kisses him.

Storm says it’s his time to be champion.

James Storm vs. Jeff Hardy

Winner gets Roode at Against All Odds. They quickly go to the mat with Hardy having moderate control. Storm hits a clothesline but is tired already and we take a break. Back with Hardy sending him to the floor and taking over back in the ring. Storm channels his inner Blanchard and hits a slingshot suplex. After a quick chinlock, Jeff starts his comeback and hits the Whisper in the Wind for two.

Now Jeff hooks a chinlock. They’ve been going in a low gear up to this point. Eye of the Storm is countered but Storm hits some freaky release mat slam for two. He loads up the Last Call but Jeff counters into the Twisting Stunner. Here comes the Swanton but Storm breaks it up. A superplex is countered but Storm hits an enziguri to knock Jeff down. Now the superplex hits but both guys are down. And then Bully Ray comes in and hits the referee for the no contest at 13:24.

Rating: C. Not bad but it was clear they were keeping it in low gear until the ending. Ray coming in was foreshadowed pretty clearly and I think they’re going to go with the three or four way main event at Against All Odds, because goodness knows there aren’t enough of those right? Anyway, not much here and the ending was pretty obvious.

Ray beats them both down and beats up referees also, all with the chain. Sting comes out with the bat and beats up Ray, chasing him off to end the show. Or wait is it the end? No it isn’t as Roode comes in and both guys get belt shots.  Roode declares it a no contest and says he’s still champion.  THAT ends the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was an ok show and that’s about it. They got some stuff set up for Against All Odds….kind of. The problem is that there was no fire to this at all and it felt like a throwaway show. That’s ok as they have a few weeks before the PPV and I’m sure a lot will happen in the UK, but this was still pretty weak stuff. The cage match was ok as was the main event, but it wasn’t anything to remember at all. Not bad, but just kind of there.

Results
Gunner b. AJ Styles – DDT
Crimson b. Magnus – Red Sky
Mickie James b. Madison Rayne – Jumping DDT
Eric Young b. Angelina Love via DQ when Love kicked Young low
Jeff Hardy vs. James Storm went to a no contest when Bully Ray interfered

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Impact Wrestling
Date: January 12, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s after Genesis now so it basically means a new day for TNA. Roode is still champion, Angle tied up the series with Storm, no titles changed, and basically the whole show didn’t change anything. Against All Odds is next and we have probably even more rematches to look forward to. Anyway, hopefully things are a little more interesting in the next few weeks. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Genesis where Roode kept the title via getting himself disqualified.

Here’s Roode who says he’s the most dominant champion ever and that he’s beaten everyone put in front of him. He wants Hardy to come out and shake his hand but gets Sting instead. Sting talks to Roode like he’s an idiot and says he wants to beat him up. It results in Hardy vs. Roode tonight.

Earlier today, Morgan got here and ran into Crimson. Crimson says he got a Direct Auto Insurance policy. Are you kidding me? They have a match tonight too against the Robs.

Robbie E/Robbie T vs. Crimson/Matt Morgan

Non-title here. Crimson starts off with E so it’s off to T quickly. And then T runs him over and it’s back to E. Crimson and Morgan take turns destroying him. Carbon Footprint takes down T and a double spinebuster ends this in 1:58. Total squash.

Joe and Magnus run out and jump the champs post match.

Eric is here.

We recap Garrett vs. his pappy and Gunner.

Cue Eric to the arena. Eric talks about how it’s not that easy to be a wrestler. You have to have talent to go with the chance. Eric may have made everything he’s done look easy, but it doesn’t work that way. Garrett comes out and says he’s not quitting because his dad says so. He lists off the top guys that he’s learning from and says he’s going to stick with this. Garrett says he isn’t going to quit and that he has a new trainer who is going to shock Eric. Garrett goes to leave but Eric stops him. The sonny grabs him by the neck and says never touch him again.

Angelina and Winter say they need to remind people who they are.

We recap ODB and Eric. Oh joy. They’re in the back and she says it was a one time thing.

Winter vs. ODB

Eric is doing his usual insane stuff. ODB chest bumps Winter and sends her flying but a Bronco Buster doesn’t hit. Winter puts her in a Tree of Woe. Off to a quick chinlock but ODB comes back with a fallaway slam and nip up….and here’s Eric to give Angelina an airplane spin. TKO beats Winter at 3:32. It’s called the Bam apparently.

Rating: D. Whatever as usual with the girl matches in whatever company they’re in. Eric is so much more bearable when he’s not TV Champion. Or stripping. Not a terrible match but it was there for Eric and that’s about it. Either way, you know the wacky romance is going to continue, but that’s ok I guess.

Here’s AJ who wants to talk to Kaz. It doesn’t take long for him to get here and AJ is mad. He wants to know why Kaz turned on him. Kaz was supposed to be the level headed one and the calm one. This happened last year with Daniels, so why is it happening here? AJ keeps yelling and Kaz says he can’t tell him. Daniels pops up and says he can. He says he’s tired of Kaz carrying AJ and that AJ is a lost cause. Daniels tells Kaz to leave which he does, so AJ CHUCKS the mic (from like two and a half feet) at Daniels and the beatdown is on. Kaz pulls him to safety but doesn’t look happy that he did so.

Ray and Roode are in the back and Ray points out that he was trending on Twitter. Roode gives me the high point of his career: saying there are more important things than Twitter. Ray won’t shut up about it while Roode freaks out about the title match later. He says he’ll have Roode’s back in exchange for a shot. Roode agrees, but doesn’t seem sincere.

Here’s Storm and he demands Angle come out, so here’s baldie himself. Storm slaps the mic out of his hand and says Angle cheated, because he’s beaten Angle twice but Kurt had to cheat to beat him. Angle says he’s done with Storm and wants the title. Sting comes out and quickly says in the title match, if Roode gets disqualified he loses the title. Also tonight, it’s the rubber match and the winner gets a title shot in the future.

Kurt Angle vs. James Storm

Angle had only until we came back from a break to get his gear, which he says he doesn’t have. After the break there’s no Kurt. Earl starts the count and Angle makes it in at 9, putting the singlet on as he runs. Storm pounds him down quickly and Angle goes shoulder first into the post. A DDT on the arm gets two. Storm goes after the hand because we’ve always heard about Angle’s grip. Angle tries to roll away and hits the floor where he finally gets in some shots to break the momentum.

Still outside, Angle pops off a belly to belly and we take a break. Back with Angle getting two off something we didn’t see. Snap suplex gets two for Kurt. After more beatings, they both try a cross body to knock them both down. Storm hammers away and hits a Backstabber. A backbreaker sets up the fabled jump into the boot but Storm grabs the foot and puts on the ankle lock. Kurt kicks him off and the Slam gets two. Angle pounds away on Storm and goes outside.

He picks up the beer bottle and brings it in, but Hebner takes it. The distraction lets Kurt spit beer in Storm’s face and the kick to the head, which isn’t super at all, for two. Storm grabs a Codebreaker out of nowhere and the Last Call ends this at 15:57. The ending came out of nowhere. Storm is #1 contender.

Rating: B-. Not as good as their other matches but it picked up a lot after the break. Another clean win over Storm isn’t going to hurt Storm at all though so no complaints there at all. Hopefully this sets up Storm vs. Roode in a big long match, but I have a feeling that’ll be saved for a major show. At least I hope it will.

Tessmacher is in some Hooters pageant.

Sting is at a photo shoot when Madison comes up. She says he can officially make her VP of the Knockouts but he says no. Instead he makes her vs. Mickie next week in a cage.

TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Bobby Roode

Roode chills on the floor before the match so Hardy dives on him to take over. Dixie is at ringside. They haven’t both been in the ring yet. Hardy dominates to start but Roode gets in a shot, only to have his piledriver attempt blocked and a slingshot sends him into the post. Twist of Fate is countered but Jeff hits a clothesline and they go in. And there’s the bell? I thought I missed it. Ok so we got three minutes of brawling beforehand. Got it.

Clothesline gets two for Hardy. Roode gets knocked outside again and we take a break. Back with them still on the floor and Hardy trying Poetry in Motion into the railing. He totally crashes and burns, which makes me shake my head when people are surprised that he has a drug problem. Jeff makes it back in at nine so Roode pounds on him even more. Blockbuster gets two. Jeff hits a jawbreaker and Russian legsweep for two. Whisper in the Wind gets two.

Twist is countered into the spinebuster and Roode tries the fisherman’s suplex but Jeff counters into another Twist. Swanton misses and Roode grabs a cover for two. This is getting really good. Twisting Stunner and Twist of Fate set up the Swanton and Roode is in BIG trouble. Hardy covers….and here’s Bully Ray to beat up the referee. The match is thrown out at let’s say 13:00.

Rating: B. Really good TV match here but again, it’s the same match that was at the PPV but better. Why would I want to buy a PPV when I could see this four days later for free? Why couldn’t this match happen at Genesis? I’ll never get parts of this company. Anyway, really good TV match here and I was getting into it before the bad ending.

Overall Rating: B. Good show tonight, but I seriously worry about this company’s long term planning abilities. Storm vs. Angle and Hardy vs. Roode were PPV matches 4 days ago and now they’re given away for free (one of which with a better ending) later in the week? At some point, you’re going to have a problem convincing fans to buy your shows when they could see the same matches with more stipulations later that week.

It’s like they’re trying to pop the TV ratings (which would make more sense if they advertised these matches and waited until next week but whatever) instead of running a regular show. Whatever though, as I’m sure some TNA superfan will explain why I’m crazy. Good show this week, but it was totally lopsided as the first hour was worthless while the second was great.

Results
Crimson/Matt Morgan b. Robbie E/Robbie T – Double spinebuster to Robbie E
ODB b. Winter – The Bam
James Storm b. Kurt Angle – Last Call
Jeff Hardy b. Bobby Roode via DQ when Bully Ray interfered

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Genesis 2012
Date: January 8, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

Today is the genesis of the beginning of the genesis of the….oh wait wrong company. It’s the first TNA PPV of the year and we have Hardy vs. Roode in the main event. The card has been fairly well built up on paper and I’m somewhat interested in what happens tonight. Also we have Angle vs. Storm II (officially III but I don’t count the first one) so I’d picture Storm to lose to set up an eventual third match at Lockdown, although they might do a draw at Against All Odds to bridge the gap. Let’s get to it.

We open with Robert Roode arriving. Jeff got here about two hours earlier.

X-Division Title: Zema Ion vs. Kid Kash vs. Austin Aries vs. Jesse Sorensen

I didn’t know this but it’s elimination rules. The fans seem to like Jesse the most. Aries chills on the floor to start and Sorensen cleans house. A northern lights gets two on Ion and Aries comes in. This is one of those matches where there’s no point in trying to keep track of everything that’s going on. Kash and Aries are sent to the floor and after Ion is put up top it’s the Tower of Doom! That hasn’t been used in awhile.

Aries goes up top but Ion shoves him down to the floor onto Kash. Ion hits a big corkscrew plancha to the floor to take the two of them out. Sorensen of course follows in the customary series of dives. Still gets a great reaction from the crowd too. Jesse gets two on Aries back inside. Ion gets sent into the corner so Kash tries a superplex, but Aries is whipped into the corner to send Kash crashing. Ion stands up and hits the 450 on Kash to put him out first.

Aries busts out the 450 on Sorensen for just two. The fans are WAY behind Jesse here. Top rope cross body gets two on Aries. A suplex into a cutter kind of move gets the same as Ion breaks up the pin because he’s an idiot. Ion goes after Jesse but walks into a small package for the second elimination to get us down to one on one. Aries rolls up Sorensen but Ion has the referee.

Brainbuster is countered into the Game Changer (Test Drive into a DDT) but Ion’s distraction keeps it at just two. Aries breaks up something off the top but runs into a boot in the corner. Ion is ducked out of sight on the floor. Sorensen goes up but Ion crotches him, letting Aries dropkick him and a middle rope brainbuster keeps the title on Aries 10:59.

Rating: C+. I was really liking this until the ending. Sorensen has been built up for awhile now and the fans are clearly behind him, but they need to pull the trigger on him if they’re going to. Restocking the division is a good idea, but if all the guys keep losing it’s not really going to do them any good. The match was fun though and a high flying match to open the show is a tried and true idea.

D-Von’s kids are in the back and they already get on my nerves. They’re dressed like Pope and are both sixteen. Why we’re wasting a decent story like this on Elijah Burke and D-Von Dudley is beyond me. Pope says he’ll get rid of D-Von tonight.

Recap of D-Von vs. Pope. Basically it’s been six months of D-Von yelling at his kids while they like Pope until they finally turned on their dad.

D’Angelo Dinero vs. D-Von

D-Von starts fast and sends Pope to the floor with a lot of punches. There isn’t much to say here as it’s just D-Von hammering away on him. The fans are split here, thereby again proving that either A, faces and heels mean nothing in TNA or B, the Impact Zone needs to shut up. D-Von finally gets caught by a shot and Pope takes over.

Pope beats him to the floor and hits a jumping axe handle to the floor. Off to a chinlock as the dueling chants continue. We get a Ronnie Garvin reference to make me roll my eyes. Pope was using a Garvin Stomp, so Taz says those are rugged kicks. Naturally has has to say “get it” to Tenay to get rid of the humor to it but that’s Taz for you.

With D-Von down, his kids come in. Pope says get him and they’re apprehensive about it. Dinero shoves them and then throws one of them to the floor. He hits the other one and D-Von snaps. The kids never touched him so it’s not a DQ. D-Von hits some power stuff as the fans want a table. Pope gets out of a fireman’s carry and hits an uppercut. A flying shoulder gets two for the former Dudley. Corner splash misses and a neckbreaker gets no cover for Pope. The boys are back up and the DDE misses. D-Von hits the inverted reverse DDT for the pin at 10:17.

Rating: D. WHOA WHOA WHOA. What in the world was the point in turning D-Von’s kids then??? TO TURN THEM BACK THE NEXT TIME WE SAW THEM??? Also, D-Von Dudley just got a win in the blowoff to a feud on PPV in 2012??? For the life of me I do not know what this company is thinking at times. Pope isn’t anything anymore but he’s worth more than D-Von….isn’t he? Also what are they going to do with D-Von? Give him the TV Title? In 2012??? I mean, Ray is doing well on his own but do they really think it’ll work twice? Stranger things have happened though…..at least I think they have.

D-Von reunites with his kids post match. So we just wasted 6 months for that payoff? ARE YOU KIDDING ME???

Sting is in the back for an interview and Velvet wants to talk to him. She wants the Knockouts VP job. Velvet goes on a big rant, talking about how Madison made herself the boss and it shouldn’t count. Velvet has a plan to keep Madison occupied during the title match and whispers it in Sting’s ear. He likes it but there’s not enough time according to Sting. She asked the crew about it earlier and it’s called the Velvet Touch. No idea what it is but Sting says go with it. She leaves and Sting talks about the main event. Hardy earned his title shot tonight and got here one step at a time. Sting says he’s in charge, not Roode.

Gunner vs. Rob Van Dam

Rematch from Impact after the weak ending. They actually go to the mat to start as Gunner is getting frustrated. Rollup gets two for RVD. Crucifix gets one and it’s a standoff. Gunner takes over with strikes and we head to the floor. Van Dam gets in a kick to take over and sends Gunner back in, but has to chase Flair off. He gets crotched on top but throws Gunner down on the way back in.

Top rope cross body gets two. Top rope kick sets up Rolling Thunder for two. Gunner rolls to the floor so RVD dives, only to have Flair pull Gunner out of the way. With Flair distracting the referee, Gunner DDTs him on the floor to basically kill him. He’s out cold and that’s enough for the pin at 6:52. Man that match went by fast.

Rating: D+. Not a bad match but too short to mean anything. I’ve heard Van Dam’s contract is up in March so maybe this is a way to write him off TV for a few months in case he doesn’t re-sign? If so it’s a good thing for him to be jobbing on his way out. Still though, match wasn’t much and Gunner is still just kind of there.

RVD goes out on a stretcher post match. He keeps trying to get the neck brace off.

Hardy is in the back and says he doesn’t brag about what he did. He’s modest and another him is what there will never be. Creatures, mount up because they have a world title to win.

We recap the Knockout Title match. Gail returned and sided with the forces of evil, allegedly taking the division back ten years.

Velvet’s Touch is a small cage at ringside.

Knockouts Title: Mickie James vs. Gail Kim

And now the box with Madison in it is going to the ceiling. The bars are painted pink and white. The match starts as the cage is being raised, letting Gail get in a shot to take over. Mickie speeds things up to take over, hitting a low dropkick for two. Gail gets in a shot and the fans are split, although leaning towards Mickie. She avoids a slide by Mickie and hooks a Dragon Sleeper which is pretty easily countered.

Mickie starts a comeback and speeds things up. There’s the nip up but she gets caught in an Octopus Hold (kind of) which she countered with something like a Samoan Drop. Jumping DDT is blocked but Gail is knocked outside. Out to the floor and Mickie hits a hurricanrana. Back in and the flying crotch to the face gets two. Madison throws an object to Gail which is intercepted. Another object (brass knucks I think) are sent down but caught by Mickie. She decks Gail and it’s a DQ at 6:21. The fans chant BS for some reason, despite it being pretty clear what happened.

Rating: C-. The match was fine but I’m really getting sick of these DQ finishes lately. I do like the 80s gimmick with the hanging cage though. It’s amazing how effective these simple things can be if done on occasion. In short: mix things up and you might get a better reaction. They’re setting up Hardy big to win tonight with these heels going over in important matches though.

Ray says he used to be nervous about the Monster’s Ball but he realized he’s the king of these matches, so tonight Abyss rejoins Immortal. Thankfully Ray lists off the members of Immortal because I had no idea who was still in it. Gunner is apparently. Who knew?

We recap Abyss vs. Ray. Basically Immortal can’t stop him so for some reason he’s agreed to this match where if Ray wins, Abyss has to rejoin Immortal.

Bully Ray vs. Abyss

This is Monster’s Ball, which basically means hardcore. Ray immediately hits the floor and walks around for a bit. He grabs a chair and feels all mighty, but Abyss gets one of his own. Here’s a chair duel and Abyss shrugs off a chair shot. Ray walks into a chokeslam which he pops up from and a big boot takes Abyss down for a good 1 second. Abyss cracks him with a chair to take over and goes to get a staple gun and cheese grater.

Ray gets in a chain shot but a trashcan is no sold. With more weapon shots, Ray grabs a kendo stick. Abyss hits the floor and finds Janice, making Ray run to the back. Abyss follows and then they’re back already. They weren’t off camera for two seconds. Back at ringside and Abyss goes into a barbed wire board. Abyss’ arm is bleeding. He throws Ray in and grabs a pair of bags.

He doesn’t open them yet and instead it’s a cheese grater to the balls. Bag #1 has thumbtacks. Ray kicks him low, shouts about how his balls hurt, and gets a table. According to wrestling law #1 though, Ray goes through it via a chokeslam for two. There are two barbed wire boards in the ring now but Ray Rock Bottoms Abyss onto one for two.

Ray slams the other board on top of Abyss and hits the backsplash off the middle rope. Ok that was kind of awesome. Since it’s TNA though, it only gets two. Ray gets Janice but walks into a chokeslam onto the tacks….for two. Bully gets a boot up in the corner and grabs a kendo stick. He beats Abyss down with it via about 12 shots but for some reason hits the ropes. That’s enough for a Black Hole Slam onto the barbed wire for the pin at 15:28.

Rating: B-. Pretty fun and very violent hardcore match. The key to this one: we hadn’t seen it in awhile which made it have more, pardon the pun, impact. The no selling at the beginning was pretty fun and the big spots worked, but at some point it got kind of ridiculous. To be fair though, that’s the point. At least Immortal didn’t get a new member though so that’s a plus.

Crimson and Morgan say they’re awesome and that they’ll win.

Tag Titles: Matt Morgan/Crimson vs. Samoa Joe/Magnus

Joe starts with Morgan and the tall one is taken down quickly. Off to Crimson who is the least interesting undefeated person this side of Tatanka. Magnus comes in and gets double teamed by the champs. Morgan hits his corner elbows and Crimson hits an overhead suplex for two. Back to Joe who runs Morgan over. Crimson comes in and has the same result as Morgan had.

Magnus comes back in and we go split screen as Ray is beating up Abyss. And now we’re back full screen as Joe has a chinlock on Crimson. We get a dueling “We Want Morgan/No We Don’t” chants. Crimson spears Joe down and we’re told that Bully Ray is trending worldwide on Twitter. Off to Morgan who hits the Hellevator (not called that) to Magnus but Joe breaks up the pin.

In a HORRIBLE looking sequence, Joe hits a bunch of strikes in the corner, followed by the middle rope elbow from Magnus. It only gets two though, due to Crimson breaking it up. The horrible part: Magnus flew off of Morgan about a second and a half before Crimson even touched him. Magnus reverses a chokeslam but a double version is enough to pin Magnus at 9:38.

Rating: D+. This just didn’t click for me at all. The messed up save really took me out of the match. Joe just isn’t going to get pushed no matter how much he gets cheered and how much his opponents get booed or get no reaction, because it’s just been decided that he’s not going to get pushed. Listen to the fans TNA. It just might work.

Storm says he’s ready for Angle. He doesn’t want to be interviewed though so he changes places, putting the hat and glasses on JB and asks about JB’s match with Angle tonight. This translates into you gotta believe…..somehow.

We recap Angle vs. Storm. Basically Angle says Storm is a barfighter and not a wrestler.

James Storm vs. Kurt Angle

Angle stalls to open us up. Storm grabs a headlock and goes for the Last Call about a minute in. Kurt heads to the floor again for a few seconds. Back in, James hits a facebuster and neckbreaker for two. Another Last Call attempt sends Kurt to the floor. Storm hits a slingshot dive to the floor to keep control. Back in the ring Kurt finally gets Storm to the mat and you know he’ll control there. Off to a chinlock.

Taz says Kurt has the best cardio ever. I think there’s an old manager on this roster that might take exception to that. Storm comes back with a Russian legsweep and a Backstabber for two. How can we be ten minutes into this already? The chinlock must have lasted longer than I thought. Angle hits Rolling Germans as Taz actually explains what makes suplexes work.

The moonsault mostly hits for two. Storm pops up with a DDT for two. They’re doing a fairly slow build here and that’s just fine. Angle Slam hits for two. The fans don’t even react to the kickout anymore. Angle tries a superkick but Storm avoids it into a cutter for two. Top rope elbow gets the same for the same person. And then Kurt pulls the referee out of position, hits a low blow and a superkick for the pin at 13:45.

Rating: B-. Really weak ending there as they seemed to be building to something huge and then you looked away for like a second and it’s over. I’d assume this sets up a rubber match which is fine. The kick looked more like a Mafia kick/MVP Drive By than the superkick but whatever. Really didn’t like the ending though.

Ray is in the back and doesn’t know where Abyss is. It’s implied he’s hiding something.

We recap Hardy vs. Roode. Basically it’s Roode is champion and selfish while it’s Hardy’s chance to come back to glory.

Roode says this is disgusting because Hardy has no business here.

TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Bobby Roode

Roode grabs the arm to start but Hardy takes him down with an armdrag. Headscissors out of the corner by Hardy sets up a little sequence of offense, capped off by a low dropkick for two. Out to the floor and Hardy hits Poetry in Motion using the steps. Tenay calls it a dropkick for some reason. Back in Hardy goes up but gets crotched to shift momentum.

Roode throws him into the corner chest first for two. Suplex sets up a middle rope kneedrop for two. Off to the chinlock by Roode and they go to the floor again. Back in, Roode hooks the Crossface and the fans don’t really react at all. Roode goes up but misses whatever he was trying to put both guys down. Hardy starts his comeback and hits a Russian legsweep and that splitlegged cover he does.

Jawbreaker doesn’t do much to Roode as he snaps off a spinebuster for two. Roode tries a superplex but Hardy knocks him off. The champ avoids the Swanton and heads to the floor again. Roode gets the belt and goes to leave but Hardy brings him back. Roode grabs a quick fisherman’s suplex for two. Twisting Stunner puts Roode onto his knees but the Whisper in the Wind gets two. There’s another attempt at the Twist and Roode bails again.

Hardy follows him up the ramp and throws him back. Roode has the belt but it gets knocked out of his hands. Hardy tries another Twist but the referee breaks it up so that it’s not onto the belt. Roode tries a rollup with feet on the ropes but it only gets two. The champ begs off…and then kicks the referee low for the REALLY FREAKING LAME DQ. Jeff hits a Twist but the bell rings before a cover. I forgot to check the clock but it was about 20:00.

Rating: C. The match was good but MAN that ending killed it. The crowd didn’t care until the end when the belt came in because they knew nothing was going to happen until the end. That being said, the ending was AWFUL. So where was Sting, the guy that is going to be watching over Roode or whatever and the guy that has Hardy’s back? Was he out front chipping golf balls?

The fans IMMEDIATELY chant that they want Sting. Hardy hits a Swanton and holds up the belt…and that’s it. No seriously, that’s the end of the show.

Overall Rating: D+. I wanted to like this show. I really did. The card looked pretty good and it had been built decently. And then this happened. What was the point of this show? The biggest thing that happened was that D-Von’s kids turned face after turning heel what, two weeks ago? Two title matches end with DQs, one ends with interference, and one is a wildcard team getting a title shot. The hardcore match was the best of the show and even then it means nothing, because while Abyss wins he’s disappeared or something I guess. Just an eye rolling show here from TNA as they give the fans nothing at all to go on.

Results
Austin Aries b. Jesse Sorensen, Kid Kash and Zema Ion – Aries last eliminated Sorensen to win
D-Von b. D’Angelo Dinero – Reverse Inverted DDT
Gunner b. Rob Van Dam – DDT on the floor
Gail Kim b. Mickie James via disqualification when Mickie hit Gail with brass knuckles
Abyss b. Bully Ray – Black Hole Slam onto a barbed wire board
Matt Morgan/Crimson b. Magnus/Samoa Joe – Double Chokeslam to Magnus
Kurt Angle b. James Storm – Superkick
Jeff Hardy b. Robert Roode via disqualification when Roode kicked the referee

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Impact Wrestling
Date: January 5, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

We’re in a new year for TNA and we have Genesis this coming Sunday. I won’t say it comes off as a throwaway show, but it feels almost like a given that Hardy is going to win the title. It almost feels like it’s too much of a given actually. Anyway, tonight we have the finals of the Wild Card Tournament to determine who faces Morgan/Crimson on Sunday. Other than that there isn’t much that I know of. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Sting to open the show. He requests Jeff come down here so here he comes too. Sting talks about Jeff rebuilding trust back one step at a time. He was dealing with some demons of his own recently but he got a second chance, just like Jeff has. Here come Angle, Ray and Roode to interrupt. Roode wants to know why Sting is endorsing Hardy instead of Roode or Angle or Ray. Roode says that Sting picks his favorites and it looks like we’re going to have a fight.

Cue Storm and Abyss and I think you know where this is going. Storm gets in the faces of Roode and Angle, talking about how the Last Call put Kurt down. Abyss is his friend and he likes to drink beer too. Kurt starts to say something but Abyss shouts him down. Abyss promises to make Ray pay for the sins of Immortal. Ray starts to respond but Sting makes the required six man for later tonight.

Madison Rayne is in a bikini. No particular reason but we cut over to Traci in the other end of the pool. Gail, the camerawoman, jumps in and it’s a big brawl. Mickie does the same. I’m not complaining about the four of them in swimsuits.

Knockout Tag Titles: Mickie James/Traci Brooks vs. Gail Kim/Madison Rayne

Big brawl to start and the challengers dominate to start. They beat Gail up with ease and send the champs to the floor as we take a break. Back with Mickie firing away on Madison in the corner. Traci and Gail get into it on the floor as Madison holds a Cravate on Mickie. Mickie hits a dropkick and everything breaks down again. Bridging rollup gets two for Mickie. Another gets the same result but Madison gets in a shot to take over again. Off to Gail and Traci as things speed up a bit. Everything breaks down as Mickie hits Madison with the top rope Thesz Press but Eat Defeat pins Traci soon thereafter at 10:30.

Rating: D. This was kind of all over the place. The whole pool thing before the match didn’t really add anything but I’m hardly complaining about looking at Mickie and Madison in swimsuits. Gail really needs a new finisher though. The whole holding Traci there until she could call back to drive the foot into her jaw didn’t work at all.

Flair hypes up Gunner in the back. They’re going to put someone else in the hospital again but Sting pops up and says that since RVD has no partner later, Gunner won’t have a manager either. Sting and Flair will be sitting in the back watching the match.

Eric is still in love with ODB and thinks they’re still in the tournament.

Recap of the Wild Card Tag Tournament.

Magnus is fired up but Joe says nothing.

Not-Fourtune says they have chemistry and they trust each other.

Garrett Bischoff is back as a referee. Sting says he’s a wrestler, not a referee and gives him some boots.

Eric goes into the Knockouts’ locker room looking for ODB and gets yelled at. He tries to lock up with them and gets choked by Madison. Madison gets shoved into a locker and this isn’t funny.

Gunner vs. Rob Van Dam

The fans get on Gunner to start but van Dam grabs a quick rollup for two. Van Dam slides to the floor and we take another break. Back and Gunner is in control with nothing of note. F5 is countered into a spinwheel kick to put both guys down. Rolling Thunder gets no cover. They go to the floor and RVD gets his leg caught in the ring skirt. Gunner pulls back the mats….which draws the DQ at 9:50. So you can get disqualified for threatening people?

Rating: D+. This was better than the Knockouts but not by much. RVD has a style which really doesn’t mesh that well with others and it didn’t here. Gunner has been a lot better recently but this wasn’t anything of note. To be fair though, he can only beat up jobbers for so long. Not bad here.

Van Dam escapes the piledriver but his spin kick to the railing hits the railing. The agents run down to break up the piledriver.

Abyss, Storm and Hardy are ready for the main event.

So are their opponents.

Kid Kash/Austin Aries vs. Jesse Sorensen/Zema Ion

This is your fourway X-Division Title match on Sunday. Sorensen and Kash start us off with Kash taking a nice dropkick. Ion tags himself in, gets struck down for a few seconds and then it’s off to Aries. MY GOODNESS that was a hard chop. He hits the suicide dive to Ion and then a spinebuster kind of move sets up the pendulum elbow for two. That one was much faster so it was much better and more believable. Sorensen comes back in and hits those jumping shots of his.

Kash and Aries have some heel (?) miscommunication and everyone is down. Ion comes in and hits a spinning cross body for two on Aries. Aries and Kash try a double suplex but Ion escapes and brings Sorensen in to speed things up. McGillicutter takes Aries down and a plancha puts Kash down as well. Brainbuster is countered and Sorensen goes up, but he and Ion argue over who gets to finish Aries. The distraction allows Aries to recover but Sorensen makes a blind tag and hits a Test Drive for the pin on Aries at 7:10.

Rating: C-. This is the same issue I had last week with this sort of match. These guys are fine at what they do, but there’s really no reason to care about them. Guys like Ion and Sorensen have next to no character and that’s really hurting them. Now they could get better later on but they need to do something with them before they can move on.

AJ and Kaz are ready. Kaz was sitting in a locker and Daniels walks out of it after AJ and Kaz leave. Interesting.

ODB is taking pictures of a photographer when Eric comes up and says they have a match. They roll around on the floor and ODB kisses him. Oh geez.

Wildcard Tag Team Tournament Finals: Samoa Joe/Magnus vs. AJ Styles/Kazarian

Winners get Morgan/Crimson on Sunday. AJ vs. Joe to start and that works for me. Joe takes him down to start and hooks an abdominal stretch to control. Off to Magnus vs. Kaz as the British guy gets his head kicked off. Back to AJ who drops a knee and brings Kaz back in. Joe comes back in with a senton backsplash for two. Taz is talking about bathtubs for some reason.

Kaz is playing Ricky Morton and gets beaten down by Magnus, but by the time I’ve typed that Kaz has rolled to the corner and brought in AJ. Springboard forearm looks to set up the Clash but Magnus escapes. Pele puts Magnus down and Daniels is in the aisle. AJ goes for a tag but Kaz drops to the floor. Joe runs over AJ and beats him down so a top rope elbow from Magnus sends he and Joe to the finals at 6:18.

Rating: C-. Not bad here and I can live with Joe and Magnus going to the title match I guess. It could have been FAR worse if nothing else. I’m really not looking forward to AJ vs. Daniels again so hopefully this is AJ vs. Kaz instead of Daniels again. Not a horrible match but it was more about the angle at the end than the match, which is ok I guess.

Morgan and Crimson are cool with facing Magnus and Joe. The challengers pop up and brag and a brawl almost breaks out but D’Lo pops up and I think they better recognize his authority.

We run down the Genesis card.

Jeff Hardy/Abyss/James Storm vs. Robert Roode/Bully Ray/Kurt Angle

Storm vs. Ray gets us going and the referee has to throw the chain….into Ray’s corner. Why not like, a neutral corner to to someone not in the ring? Ray tries to get a cheap shot in the corner but gets chopped instead. Off to Abyss and Ray tries to hide. Off to the champ instead and to his credit he goes after Abyss. The heels manage some double teaming on Abyss and we take a break.

Back with Angle hammering on Abyss but it’s off to Storm vs. Roode quickly. Ray clotheslines Storm down quickly and we have Beer Money and Angle in there at the same time. Ok now it’s just Beer Money but Ray tags in quickly. After a quick bow and arrow hold it’s back to Angle. Storm hits a Russian legsweep to put Angle down and it’s hot tag to Hardy to meet Roode. Twisting Stunner gets two and everything breaks down. Everybody pairs off….and it’s thrown out 12:07. LAME.

Rating: C-. Pretty decent six man main event until the weak ending. Just have someone take a quick finisher into a rollup for the pin. It’s not like it’s going to cripple them before Sunday. Not a fan of endings like these but it could have been worse again. Still would have liked to see Hardy get a pin on Roode though.

Twist to Roode post match but Ray breaks up the Swanton. Codebreaker to Roode but Angle breaks up the kick, hitting one of his own to Storm. Abyss cleans house now and tries Chock Treatment to Angle but Ray gets his chain and hits Abyss with it a few times. The bad guys rule the ring and Abyss is hung a bit. I mean a chain is put around his neck and pulled on you sick freaks. Hardy is tapping to a Crossface and we go off the air.

Overall Rating: C. This wasn’t that bad and for a go home show it was really pretty good. I think all of the feuds other than Pope vs. D-Von were addressed and that’s a pretty good ratio overall. The wrestling wasn’t all that good but it set up stuff for Sunday as well as for the future. Also, it was way better than Raw which really isn’t saying much but it’s true. Not bad and Genesis is pretty well set up, which is the whole point.

Results
Gail Kim/Madison Rayne b. Mickie James/Traci Brooks – Eat Defeat to Brooker
Rob Van Dam b. Gunner via DQ when Gunner pulled the ring mats back
Jesse Sorensen/Zema Ion b. Austin Aries/Kid Kash – Rolling DDT to Aries
Samoa Joe/Magnus b. AJ Styles/Kazarian – Top rope elbow to Styles
Abyss/Jeff Hardy/James Storm vs. Robert Roode/Kurt Angle/Bully Ray went to a double disqualification

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Impact Wrestling
Date: December 29, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s the last show of the year and we have one more Impact after this before we get to Genesis. Unless my memory is off (and it very well may be), there are only two matches set: D-Von vs. Pope and the title match. There are a lot of other matches which you can pretty much assume but I don’t think they’ve been named yet. I’d expect a lot of that tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video about the Knockouts situation.

Gail and Madison come to the ring with the latter demanding Tara and Tessmacher get out here now. She says that she needs to get rid of the diseases that Tara and Tessmacher carry around with them. And they’re both fired. Cue Sting and Madison kind of panics. She says she has this under control but Sting says it’s not over until he says it’s over. Madison doesn’t have a legally binding contract like Karen had so she has no power. They get into a funny shouting contest and Gail has to defend against Mickie tonight.

Steiner tells Abyss that they’re the best team out there. Abyss agrees that they’re a team. Ok then.

Wildcard Tag Title Tournament Semi-Finals: Abyss/Scott Steiner vs. AJ Styles/Kazarian

Kaz vs. Steiner start us off but Scott yells at AJ before the match gets going. Nothing happens there so it’s off to the Grand Slam winners. AJ uses strikes and avoids the power. Steiner cheats a bit and Shock Treatment gets no cover on AJ. Steiner comes in and beats on AJ some more but AJ hits a Pele to counter.

Double tag brings in Kaz vs. Abyss in I guess a rematch from the X Title match earlier this year. Man that sounds like forever again. Kaz fires off whatever he can including a springboard tornado DDT for two. Chokeslam is countered into a victory roll for two. The second attempt at a chokeslam puts Kaz down and Abyss knocks AJ into the barricade. He brings in Steiner…and hits him with the Black Hole Slam to send the former Fourtune guys to the finals at 7:50.

Rating: C-. Not a bad tag match but I couldn’t get into it for the most part. Abyss turning on Steiner isn’t really all that shocking and it’s good to see a team that makes sense going to the finals of this thing, although I have a feeling the wacky team is going to wind up winning the thing, because that’s what TNA thinks is the right idea.

Ray comes out to yell at Abyss post match and we take a break.

Post break Ray yells at him and says he’s tired of Abyss being a bully to him and Steiner. Abyss grabs him by the throat and Ray asks him what it’ll take to get him back into Immortal. Abyss wants Ray one on one at Genesis. If Abyss loses, he’s back into Immortal. Ray goes to leave but Abyss stops him. The match is Monster’s Ball.

Sting is with Kurt in the back and they talk about the incident last week in Tennessee. It’s Angle vs. Storm at the PPV and Kurt is getting a tuneup match tonight. It’s with RVD.

Flair and Gunner say Gunner will be great. Gunner is in action later tonight. Flair looks really old. Gunner is looking to put someone in an ambulance tonight.

Anthony Nese vs. Zema Ion

It’s the final match in the series and it’s contract on a pole. Well what else would it be? Aries is in on commentary here. The winner of this joins Aries, Kash and Sorensen. According to Aries, Ion has pole experience while being an exotic dancer. Both guys tease going for the pole but it turns into your regular “I go for the pole, you stop me then you go for the pole and I stop you.”

They go to the floor where Nese takes over. Nese goes for the contract but Ion saves. Ion goes for the contract but Nese saves. Nese hits a German off the top but hangs himself in the Tree of Woe. He goes for the contract again but gets shoved into the barricade. And then Ion gets the contract at 4:33.

Rating: D+. Ok then. I mean really, ok then, let’s go to the next match. There’s nothing interesting here at all and now we have a new challenger. There’s nothing different about these two other than Ion has messier hair. The matches were ok and that’s about it. I don’t know what the point of this being a series but whatever.

Gunner vs. Douglas Williams

Total dominance for awhile by Gunner and then they go to the floor. Gunner shoves the referee and it’s a DQ at 1:38.

Williams takes the DDT on the concrete post match.

Roode’s family still doesn’t like him.

Here’s Roode who says it’s no shock that he’s selfish. His friends and family have all turned their backs on him, but tonight he’s brought one of his friends here. This name is Tracy and they’ve been friends for over twenty years. Tracy stands up and gets an ovation for some reason. Roode apologizes for not answering his calls and texts lately. Tracy has been brought here tonight to say whatever he wants.

He talks about how everyone is missing him and wondering where Roode has been. His wife wants to know where he is and his kids want to know why Tracy is driving them to hockey practice. Bobby can still come home. Roode says that back in high school, Tracy was his lackey. Roode says his family’s fifteen minutes of fame are up and goes to leave, then he beats Tracy up. Jeff runs out for the save.

Eric and ODB have more “comedy”.

Angle rants about facing RVD later tonight.

Wildcard Tag Team Tournament Semi-Finals: Magnus/Samoa Joe vs. ODB/Eric Young

Eric locks up with Tenay on the way to the ring. See it’s funny. Eric and Magnus start but ODB comes in before there’s any contact. There’s no contact as both circle the other in a flirty manner. Tag off to Eric who strips and comes in. Remember when Joe says Eric was all awesome at Turning Point 07? I don’t think this is what he intended. Joe comes in and has a decent mini-match with Eric. ODB gets launched to the floor and the MuscleBuster sends Joe and Magnus to the finals at 5:14.

Rating: D+. The comedy here wasn’t funny, but it’s Eric Young who does the same nonsense every week. To be fair though, the guy can’t get over without a CRAZY comedy gimmick so he has to do this. Not much here and I have a feeling the random pairing will beat the normal team to get the shot because that’s how TNA works. Nowhere near as bad as it could be though so it’s not much of a complaint.

Mickie says the title match will be interesting.

Kurt Angle vs. Rob Van Dam

So the girls are main eventing? Ok then. Basic stuff to start as neither guy has much of an advantage so far. Rob kicks a lot and hits Rolling Thunder for two. Kurt snaps off a belly to belly for the same and a regular suplex gets two also. After a quick chinlock Van Dam takes over again with some clotheslines. Kurt gets in a shot and tries a superkick but Van Dam takes him down. Five Star misses and there’s the ankle lock. And here’s Storm to superkick Angle for the DQ at 5:17.

Rating: C-. Nothing special at all here but the ending was something that needed to happen. That’s going to be a great match once it happens at Genesis and I can live with Storm losing if they have a third match. Not bad here but they needed a few more minutes to get something special going, which to be fair wasn’t the idea here.

RVD isn’t thrilled with Storm coming out there.

Angle isn’t either.

Storm says he’s coming for Angle.

Knockouts Title: Mickie James vs. Gail Kim

Mickie grabs a rollup for two almost immediately. Thesz Press hits and Mickie takes over. Mickie sends her to the floor but misses a baseball slide. A neckbreaker hits though and we take a break. Back with a slugout on the floor won by Gail as they go back into the ring. Gail grabs the arm for some cranking.

Mickie fights back but Gail hooks Inoki’s Octopus Hold. I can’t say I’m complaining about the visual. Mickie rolls into the ropes so Gail tries it again but it doesn’t work as well this time. Ok so maybe it does. After she gets done with that, a missile dropkick gets two for the champ. Eat Defeat is countered and Mickie hits a kick of her own to put both chicks down. Mickie makes her comeback and goes up but Gail heads to the floor. Mickie tries a Thesz Press to the floor but leaves it short so it doesn’t look that great. Her knee is hurt so a masked chick runs in, hits the Rayne Drop on Mickie and Gail get the pin at 14:17.

Rating: C. FAR better Knockout match than the Knockouts or Divas have done lately but still nothing all that great. I’ll give them points for having something else in the main event but the ending kind of sucked, especially given what’s shown post match. Not sure why they went with this to end the year but whatever.

Post match, yep that’s Madison with facepaint.

Overall Rating: C-. I won’t say the show was bad tonight, but it didn’t click for me. Things ran well and the storylines are pretty logical, but for the most part they’re not grabbing me which is probably more preference than anything else. The problem is mainly on top as Roode still comes off as a midcard guy in the main event. Not bad, but not something I was able to get into.

Results
Kazarian/AJ Styles b. Abyss/Scott Steiner – Kazarian b. Steiner after a Black Hole Slam from Abyss
Zema Ion b. Anthony Nese – Ion grabbed the contract
Douglas Williams b. Gunner via DQ when Gunner shoved the referee
Samoa Joe/Magnus b. ODB/Eric Young – MuscleBuster to Young
Gail Kim b. Mickie James – Pin after a Rayne Drop from Madison Rayne

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Impact Wrestling
Date: November 24, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

It’s Turkey Day here in the Impact Zone and that usually means a pretty fun show from these guys. There’s always the chance of the return of the turkey suit which thankfully isn’t coming out of a huge egg and dancing with a bald interviewer. Expect a bit more build towards Final Resolution but the majority of things should be a bit lighter tonight, which is fine. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video of last week with Storm looking for his attacker with Angle being the reveal at the end of the show. There’s still tension between Storm and AJ.

Here’s Angle, who along with Storm will captain teams for an elimination tag later. On Thanksgiving? You don’t say! Kurt says it wasn’t an attack from behind. James just didn’t see him coming. Cue Storm who says this is beyond personal. It’s business now and if Angle says he won’t jump someone from behind, here’s his chance to fight face to face. Angle says this is about Storm stealing the title from Angle so Angle cost him the title in Georgia. Immortal plus Daniels comes out so Storm SHOWS HE HAS A BRAIN by hitting Angle once and running. Anderson, AJ and RVD come out for the big brawl.

Eric Young brings an old referee back on a homemade bicycle. Rudy Charles brings out the turkey suit.

We recap Mexican America losing the tag titles last week to Morgan/Crimson.

Tag Titles: Mexican America vs. Crimson/Matt Morgan

A big brawl to start is won by the champions and it’s down to Anarquia vs. Morgan. The beating begins as the champions pound him down. A double chokeslam ends this in 1:57. Total squash.

Eric Young says Sting has said there’s officially a turkey suit challenge later on. It’s a regular match and the loser has to wear the suit. Rob Terry gives him a pat down and says he’s not on the list. If Robbie doesn’t do it, he’s stripped of the title. The Robs go to find Sting and Young admits Sting didn’t say any of that.

Here are Karen and her associates. She calls out five of the Knockouts (Tara, Tessmacher, Winter, Angelina and Velvet) and gets them very quickly. The fans want a rematch but the fans (according to Karen) want more skin. Tonight it’s the first lingerie ball.

The face Knockouts whine about the match. Yeah…..I’d buy that if the pigeons weren’t always being let loose.

The heel Knockouts are happy when Mickie comes in to yell at Gail in private. They leave the door open and Mickie yells at Gail for going against whatever she said when she wasn’t in there. Mickie gets beaten down.

Angelina Love/Winter/Madison Rayne vs. Tara/Velvet Sky/Brooke Tessmacher

They’re all in lingerie/thongs. The anger over it isn’t working at all but they look good. Scratch the thongs actually. It’s a regular six person tag. Winter shows off and looks good like that. Tessmacher rips her shirt off and is in the exact same thing she wrestles in. For chicks that are ticked off, they don’t seem to mind posing on the ropes. Velvet is in less clothing than usual. They have a pose off until FINALLY the evil ones jump them. There’s a quick commercial as Tara and Winter get us going.

Back with the good chicks in control and Tessmacher gives Winter a Stink Face. Yeah we get it: it’s embarrassing or whatever. Do an actual move please. Tessmacher gets beaten down as Taz is talking about Helen Keller. Madison is far more covered than she usually is. Hot tag finally brings in Velvet and house is cleaned. Madison grabs a belt but Mickie comes out for the save. Velvet’s bad facebuster ends this at 13:18.

Rating: F. Dumb premise, dumb anger, no thongs, dumb match.

Here’s Hardy in a mask but it’s actually Jeff Jarrett. He wants to know why the fans love Hardy. Is it because he looks like a clown? Perhaps the bizarre promos or the stupid chances he takes for the fans. Jarrett wants Hardy’s fans to grow up and embarrass the company they work for. Here’s Hardy at a full sprint to beat down Jarrett. Immortal plus Daniels makes the save. Immortal comes out (plus Daniels and Roode….oh no) and here’s Team Storm for the save. Jarrett sends Hardy into the steps and then does it again. Immortal stands tall.

We get a history of the turkey suit match which is one of those funny things that you can get in wrestling.

Robbie E vs. Eric Young

Robbie jumps him on the floor and beats up the turkey suit also. This is non title. Rudy counts really slowly. He won’t drop the suit for the count and we’re in a total comedy match here. Robbie gets what was presumably loaded punch for the pin at 2:14. The referee sees it and reverses the decision. Oh wait he restarts the match. Robbie shoves the referee and a piledriver ends this clean. Total comedy match and there isn’t a thing wrong with that.

Big Rob has to put on the suit because Robbie is out cold.

Rudy and Eric train for next year on a bike but Rudy crashes.

Team Angle vs. Team Storm

AJ Styles, Mr. Anderson, Rob Van Dam, Jeff Hardy
Jeff Jarrett, Bully Ray, Christopher Daniels, Bobby Roode

There’s been talk all night about Hardy being on the team but he’s not mentioned here. Storm is in street clothes. Oh wait Angle and Storm aren’t wrestling. Ok then. So it’s 4-3? This is an elimination style match so it’s Survivor Series rules. Roode sits in on commentary because he’s not loose yet. AJ vs. Daniels gets us off because we need something new. After nothing of note happens there it’s off to Jarrett vs. Anderson.

Van Dam comes in and this is starting pretty slowly. Rob gets caught in the corner and Ray takes over on him with a splash. Not hot tag to Anderson who takes over with some elbows and a neckbreaker for two. Ray hits a Rock Bottom and Roode heads to the ring. He steals a tag and gets the pin on Anderson to make it 4-3 or 4-2 depending on how you look at it.

Here’s AJ to speed things way up with a backdrop. I think the ankle is ok now. Roode hits him low right in front of the referee for….not a DQ. Ok yeah it was but there was no bell. Ah there’s the announcement. We take a break as Daniels pounds on AJ. Back with Ray coming in to beat down AJ even more. AJ counters Angel’s Wings into a rana and then the Pele puts Daniels down.

Hot tag brings in RVD who cleans house with various kicks. Rolling Thunder puts Daniels down but Angle breaks up the Five Star. He and Storm fight up the ramp but RVD gets rolled up and pinned to make it 3-1. Daniels is bleeding from the mouth. It’s a 3-1 beatdown and Ray tells Daniels to give him the moonsault. It eats knees/feet because Ray shouted GIVE HIM THE MOONSAULT. Ray accidentally takes out Jarrett and a Pele puts Ray down.

Cue Hardy as all four are down. He’s pulling his pants up as he comes out. What was he doing before that??? Hardy slips on the apron as he comes out but there’s the hot tag anyway. He cleans house and the Twist takes out Daniels to tie things up. Twist to Jarrett is countered so Hardy gets a small package to take him out instead. A HUGE boot takes Hardy down for two and Jarrett hammers on Hardy a bit more. AJ makes a blind tag and hits the forearm on Ray to win it at 18:45.

Rating: C-. Not bad here and it makes Hardy look like a star which is the right idea. It’s nothing we haven’t seen a bunch before but it didn’t need to be. Hardy stands tall and we’ll get to some post match stuff here in a few seconds. For a Thanksgiving show main event, this was certainly fine.

Roode lays out both winners with the belt post match.

Overall Rating: C. I’m going with right in the middle here. On a normal week this would have been around an F, but the thing you have to remember here is that it’s Thanksgiving. There’s no reason to assume this show was going to be anything of note and it wasn’t supposed to be. No one is going to watch the show, so why waste anything big on it? You see Raw do this a lot and there’s nothing wrong with that. Not an interesting show, but all things considered this was fine. Well ok it was bad but there are a lot of things to consider on it.

Results
Matt Morgan/Crimson b. Mexican America – Double chokeslam to Anarquia
Brooke Tessmacher/Tara/Velvet Sky b. Winter/Angelina Love/Madison Rayne – BeauDT to Rayne
Eric Young b. Robbie E – Piledriver
Team Storm b. Team Angle last eliminating Bully Ray

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Impact Wrestling
Date: November 16, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

Well we’re after the Turning Point PPV now and head towards Final Resolution which is likely going to see AJ vs. Roode II because AJ was injured in the previous match. Also because there really isn’t anyone else to face Roode at the moment. Other than that, expect more Bischoff vs. Bischoff stuff to bore the fans out of their minds. Impact has been good lately though so let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the main event of Turning Point where Roode cheated to keep the title.

Here’s Roode to open the show. He says it’s a shame to think he was part of Fourtune. He was the star, he was the leader and he was the future of the company. Roode says he got rid of the two of them and here’s Storm. They’ve made him the real star of the company in this. Storm wants to know why Roode jumped him, which Roode denies. Storm doesn’t care so he charges but security stops him. He turns around to have AJ behind him and the beating is on. Security pulls them apart and are about as successful as they usually are.

Post break AJ rants some more and Roode says no rematch. The brawl starts up again and cue Sting. He makes a 30 minute iron man match for Final Resolution for the title.

After we hear Taz and Mike talk a bit, Roode goes after Dixie in the front row. AJ makes the save but Roode hits him in the back to knock Dixie down as well.

Joe comes up to Storm in the back and says it wasn’t Roode as he saw him the whole time. Joe says it wasn’t him either. They fight anyway since this is TNA where backstage brawls are required by law.

Sting goes after Roode post break, saying that was like putting Roode’s hands on Sting.

TV Title: Robbie E vs. D-Von

Pope is hitting on some blonde outside. D-Von takes over to start and runs him over with a clothesline. Some shoulders and a side slam put him down as well. D-Von throws him to the floor right in front of Pope. Pope slaps Robbie and is drilled by Terry for his efforts. D-Von’s kids go after Terry for no apparent reason and Eric Young comes down to pop Terry with a chair which does nothing. D-Von’s distraction lets Robbie roll him up at 2:00 to retain.

D-Von yells at his kids post match and they stay with Pope.

Sting talks to Garrett, praising him for his match last week. Garrett wants more of Gunner and Sting isn’t sure. Garrett leaves when Morgan and Crimson come up. They wind up with a tag title shot later in the show. Sting is worried about the lack of a tag division or something.

Eric and Flair rant about Garret when Sting comes up to them talk about the rewriting of Bischoff’s contract. However Eric doesn’t have a signed contract so it doesn’t mean jack. Sting makes Garrett vs. Gunner for later.

Kid Kash/Austin Aries vs. Jesse Sorensen/Brian Kendrick

Kendrick has dark hair now. Jesse vs. Kash to start because we haven’t seen that enough yet. Cross body off the top gets two for Jesse. Aries won’t tag in and Kash gets rolled up for two by Kendrick. Aries comes in for about a second, ducks an enziguri and here’s Kash again. Hot tag to Jesse and he gets a northern lights for two. Aries walks out to make this a handicap match. Kash misses a moonsault and Sorensen hits a reverse Cross Rhodes (it ends in a DDT) for the pin at 5:02.

Rating: C-. I’m so over Kid Kash at this point that it’s not even funny. The guy is old, he’s fat, he can’t talk, and he’s not interesting. He’s never meant anything but he’s running his mouth about being a legend which no one even remembers. Nothing to see here as it’s the same stuff they’ve been doing for awhile.

Karen is her usual self and gives Gail the night off.

Anderson is playing a football game in the back when Storm comes up, wanting to know if Anderson had anything to do with it.

Gauntlet Match

There are ten chicks in it and the winner is #1 contender. Velvet vs. Rosita starts us off. I’ll only be giving the total time for this. Velvet is in blue which I highly approve of. Velvet hits a facebuster to end Rosita in about 4 seconds. Tessmacher is next and we have some good looking women in TNA. Brooke takes over and hits her Stinkface thing and takes her top off. A bulldog ends her a second later.

Fourth is Angelina who counters the facebuster into a rollup with tights to end it. I hate gauntlet matches because most of them are quick wins that are totally unrealistic by comparison to regular matches. Velvet kicks Mickie in the face on her way to the ring and we take a break. Back with Love hammering on Mickie which doesn’t last long as Mickie kicks her head off for a quick pin.

Off to Sarita in 6th and this is UGLY. Sarita botches a springboard move, landing on Mickie’s head despite Mickie ducking. A sloppy jumping DDT (head didn’t hit) ends this a bit later. Tara is 7th and they hit the match. Tara throws on a heel hook and then the standing moonsault for two. Another somewhat bad jumping DDT gets us to Winter who is still gorgeous. A bridging suplex gets two as Mickie is getting tired.

Mickie escapes a fireman’s carry and hits a SICK kick to Winter’s head for the elimination. ODB is in at 9 and is A LOT slimmer. She even had abs. A fallaway slam sets up a nipup and a Bronco Buster. She’s in camo pants now which works a lot better for her than the long shirt she usually wears. Top rope Thesz Press gets rid of ODB and Madison is last. ODB drills Mickie before leaving and hits a TKO (love that move). Madison walks around forever and Mickie rolls her up for a surprise pin at 15:02.

Rating: D. I hate these matches. The 9 eliminations took WAY too short an amount of time and it’s unrealistic even from a wrestling perspective. Nothing to see here although the girls looked hot and it’s amazing how much better/in depth the Knockouts are than the Divas at this point.

Ray is talking to some ugly chick (joke from Turning Point I think) when Storm comes up. He says take a free shot because he thinks Ray was involved. Ray says no but he knows who it was and that person is here. He offers Storm a spot in Immortal and Storm turns him down flat.

Garrett says he hopes Gunner underestimates him again tonight.

Here’s Hardy and we get a quick shot from Turning Point where he beat Jarrett three times in a row. He says thanks to the fans and promises to always be there for them. His sights are shifting to the world title and that brings out Karen. She says someone with some balls needs to put Hardy in his place. She has the biggest set here and says Hardy needs to do more than just have sad eyes.

What he did at Turning Point wasn’t being a man and Hardy needs to be one. She calls Hardy disrespectful and talks about Hardy’s wife Beth. Karen pretended to be Beth’s friend and performance problems are implied. She tries to get Jeff to hit her and says he didn’t beat Jarrett fairly. Karen goes to slap him but Jeff blocks it. Here’s Jeff Jarrett with the AAA belt but Hardy sees it coming. Karen tries a low blow but Hardy grabs it and the brawl is on.

Flair and Bischoff give Gunner a pep talk, saying destroy Garrett tonight.

Tag Titles: Mexican America vs. Crimson/Matt Morgan

Crimson vs. Anarquia starts us off and the chicks distract Red Boy so Hernandez can clothesline him down. LAX beats on Crimson who can’t get anything going in the first three minutes or so. A shoulder/spear takes down SuperMex and it’s a double tag for Morgan and Anarquia. Morgan throws everyone around and chokeslams Anarquia for two. Exploder suplex and the Carbon Footprint give us new champions at 5:21.

Rating: C-. Not much to see here but the titles need a shot in the arm at this point. Maybe this is it and that’s perfectly fine. I hope this goes somewhere different than Morgan and Hernandez went to as that did no one any favors. Too short to mean much but this could have been a lot worse. At least Mexican America and their dead end gimmick is over.

Storm thinks he knows who the attacker is.

Garrett Bischoff vs. Gunner

Sting, Eric and Flair are in corners. Garrett has his own song now. He uses basic stuff to start and it’s off to Gunner in control because he’s, you know, not a referee. A charge of his hits the post but Eric grabs Garrett’s foot and Gunner takes over again. A spear in the corner has Garrett in trouble but you know the fluke pin is coming. And there it is as Garrett counters a suplex into a DDT for the clean pin at 3:56.

Rating: F. The match sucked, but maybe that’s because HE IS A REFEREE. I know he’s Bischoff’s son, and that’s what’s wrong with this story: the guy has no reason to be in the ring but he’s there anyway because he’s Eric Bischoff’s son and is getting 3-4 segments a show and going over people like Gunner instead of people like Alex Shelley or someone else going over him. That’s why this angle doesn’t work.

Here’s Storm for the big finish. He says he’s being passed over because he’s too southern and that’s not right. Storm calls out AJ of all people and Styles is a little banged up still. AJ: “Are you kidding me?” AJ doesn’t think that makes sense because he’s been the one behind Storm the entire time. Storm points out that ever since Storm has been on the shelf, AJ has gotten two shots at Roode. Styles says Sting made those decisions and denies being the attacker.

They’re about to fight when Kaz comes out to break them up. Kaz gets AJ out of the ring and Angle comes in from under the ring for the beatdown. We have an attacker.

Overall Rating: C+. Pretty decent show tonight where the wrestling matches don’t add up to the final grade of the show. A good amount of stuff happened here with new champions and a new main event level feud starting up. I’m ok with Angle being the guy but it can’t end with Angle going over Storm. They’ve made a new star in the Cowboy and they need to keep him strong. Beating Angle in a feud would be a great way to do that, but Angle going over would completely miss the point. Decent show tonight though.

Results
Robbie E b. D-Von – Rollup
Jesse Sorensen/Brian Kendrick b. Kid Kash/Austin Aries – Spinning DDT to Kash
Mickie James won a gauntlet match last eliminating Madison Rayne
Crimson/Matt Morgan b. Mexican America – Carbon Footprint to Anarquia
Garrett Bischoff b. Gunner – DDT

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Impact Wrestling
Date: November 10, 2011
Location: Macon Coliseum, Macon, Georgia
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

We’re still in Macon and it’s time for the go home show before Turning Point. At this moment, we have no main event as the world title has changed twice in three weeks so we haven’t had much of an opportunity to set anything up. I’d expect a tacked on main event which is TNA’s custom far too often. This show has been better than Raw (arguably) recently. Let’s get to it.

We open up with a video of Roode turning heel last week to win the title.

Here’s Roode to open the show with the belt. He doesn’t know why the people are booing him. Wait, are they booing him or are they chanting Roode, because that’s what they were doing last week when they were cheering him on. Is it because he killed Beer Money? Or is it because he did everything that they all would have done in the same situation? This is a new generation and he’s the leader of that generation.

You can do everything right and it means nothing. We see an inset of Storm wanting to come to the ring but the agents hold him back. Roode talks about how after BFG, he learned you have to take your opportunities and that’s what he did. Here comes Storm and the fans are happy to see him. Storm beats them down and charges the ring but Roode bails.

As security holds Storm back, here’s Sting. He makes the rematch for tonight and that’s it.

Tonight it’s AJ vs. Daniels. AGAIN.

Here’s a video on Crimson vs. Morgan. This isn’t a dream match no matter how much they want it to be.

D’Angelo Dinero vs. Crimson

After having to watch Elijah Burke and Matt Morgan reach levels of uninteresting that I honestly didn’t think existed in their feud in OVW in I think 03 or 04, THANK GOODNESS this is Crimson. They exchange headlocks to start us off and I don’t think anyone knows who Pope is. A DDT gets two as does a middle rope fist drop. Crimson grabs a Cravate but gets punched back again. Pope goes up again but jumps into the Red Sky for the pin at 2:38. As almost usual with Crimson, he got beaten down but hit one move for the win.

Gunner says he’ll destroy Garrett Bischoff and something about a code in the military.

Gunner vs. Garrett Bischoff

Gunner is really lous and talks trash to Garrett. He turns to talk to Eric (he and Flair are on the floor) and walks into a pretty decent armdrag and make it two of them. Garrett takes over with some basic stuff and isn’t half bad at it. And then Flair and Eric come in, I think for a DQ, as Garrett runs. It ran about 1:45. Based on this, Eric can have his contract rewritten.

Robbie E and Big Rob try to get to Ronnie from Jersey Shore. This goes nowhere.

After a break we see Storm out cold and covered in blood.

Zema Ion vs. Jesse Sorensen

Basic stuff to start and Ion goes up. The 450 misses a reverse Cross Rhodes ends this at 1:57. There’s nothing else to say here.

Kid Kash comes out to run his mouth and be annoying and southern. Kash says Sorensen gets the title shot at Turning Point but it’s in a three way dance. Sorensen signs the contract and Kash implies he slept with Sorensen’s mother.

Karen tells Gail and Madison that they look pretty.

Knockout Tag Titles: Mickie James/Velvet Sky vs. Gail Kim/Madison Rayne

Velvet spears Madison down to start and hammers away. Madison gets beaten down quickly and it’s off to Mickie who looks great tonight. Gail shoves her off the top and then comes in to beat on her a bit. The match means nothing at all as it’s all to set up Gail pinning Velvet to set up the PPV match for the singles title. Velvet comes in and takes over, hitting an awful looking spinning bulldog or something. Mickie goes up and something is clipped as Mickie hits the Thesz Press. A sitout Pedigree ends Madison but Velvet walks into Eat Defeat for the pin at 4:00. See? Told you so.

Rating: D. Whatever man. That’s what I’m going to start every Knockouts rating with. The problem at the end of the day is that these stories don’t mean anything and the feuds usually have zero heat on them at all. Nothing to see here and like I said, the ending was about as obvious as any I’ve ever seen in my life.

James is awake and Sting comes to see him. The trainer is trying to sew him up and he can’t stand.

We recap the Robs vs. Ronnie/Eric Young. Let’s get this over with.

Ronnie/Eric Young vs. Robbie E/Rob Terry

Ronnie and Robbie start us off but they tag out before there’s any contact. Eric locks up with the referee. Oh that wacky comedy! Eric gets beaten down as we await the “reality” TV star to make the save. A belly to belly suplex puts Robbie down and there’s the hot tag to Ronnie. To the shock of no one, he does some basic stuff not that horrible and we’re supposed to care for some reason. Eric drops a top rope elbow…and he’s in leopard print underwear now. A splash from Ronnie gets the pin at 4:15.

Rating: F. I hate the Jersey Shore and I review wrestlers having matches. That is all.

Immortal says they’ll win tonight.

Mexican America gets in a fight with Ink Inc in catering. There’s a tag title match Sunday.

Here’s an MMA guy on commentary for the next match.

AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels

This is match #eleventy billion between them. The MMA guy gets a closeup as we miss part of the match. The match is a backdrop as we praise Bellator and how great it is. They’re debuting on Spike soon after UFC leaves. AJ flips over in the corner and Daniels takes over. This is just their usual match with Daniels controlling for the most part and then AJ starts his comeback. He hits his usual stuff and we talk about MMA. Here’s the screwdriver after we go to the floor. RVD comes out to take it away and AJ uses the distraction to hit the Clash for the pin at 7:27.

Rating: C. This is a good example of a match that’s fine but I just don’t care. The problem again is that we’ve seen this so many times that there’s nothing to see in it anymore. We’ve seen AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels so many times that there’s nothing left to watch them do. Daniels vs. anyone else would be interesting.

Here’s the card for Turning Point. The tag title match is in a six person match.

Immortal vs. Jeff Hardy/Mr. Anderson/???

The mystery partner is Abyss. Well that was shocking. Scott beats on Hardy a bit as Hardy sells like only he can. He really is good at that. Jeff hits the mule kick and it’s off to Anderson. The heels beat on him a bit with a bunch of elbows from Ray. Off to Hardy as we’re waiting for Abyss to come in and dominate.

The Matt Hardy leg drop hits Bubba but Jarrett breaks up the Swanton. Hardy gets beaten down for a bit and it’s off to Abyss for the real hot tag. The Stroke is countered into Shock Treatment and Ray walks into the Twist and Swanton. Stroke to Hardy, Mic Check to Jarrett, suplex to Anderson, Black Hole Slam and pin to Steiner at 8:15.

Rating: C-. Basic match here but the ending was pretty good. Abyss as a mystery partner was kind of odd as it’s not like there’s anyone else they would have put in there that would have made sense. Him as an official face isn’t bad and it’s good to see Immortal pretty firmly in the midcard where they belong.

TNA World Title: Bobby Roode vs. James Storm

The match is set to start after a break and there’s no Storm. The music plays twice and he finally comes out. He’s COVERED in blood. Storm goes off to start but then collapses. Storm is out cold. The referee throws up the X and the trainer is here. Roode acts all concerned and says he wants to check on Storm. He asks if the amtch is over and then rolls Storm up for the pin at 2:40.

AJ and Kaz come out and it’s AJ vs. Roode on Sunday.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling wasn’t great here but the big thing is we had 8 matches. That’s a HUGE improvement as that means 8 different stories or angles were addressed, plus the tag title match was actually mentioned on TV. This was a well put together show which is what they’ve been lacking for a long time. Good stuff here, although not great. Major improvement in some areas though.

Results
Crimson b. D’Angelo Dinero – Red Sky
Garrett Bischoff b. Gunner via DQ when Ric Flair interfered
Jesse Sorensen b. Zema Ion – Reverse Spinning DDT
Gail Kim/Madison Rayne b. Velvet Sky/Mickie James – Eat Defeat
Ronnie/Eric Young b. Robbie E/Rob Terry – Ronnie pinned Robbie E after a splash
AJ Styles b. Christopher Daniels – Styles Clash
Abyss/Jeff Hardy/Mr. Anderson b. Jeff Jarrett/Scott Steiner/Bully Ray – Black Hole Slam to Steiner
Robert Roode b. James Storm – Pin after Storm collapsed

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Impact Wrestling
Date: November 3, 2011
Location: Macon Coliseum, Macon, Georgia
Commentators: Taz, Mike Tenay

We’re on the road again in Georgia because we’re not allowed to go outside the SEC for some reason. Tonight’s main event is the Beer Money explosion because who needs months of build for a team that people have wanted to see feud for a very long time? I mean, they’ve had a week to build things up so that’s more than enough time I suppose. Anyway let’s get to it.

The opening video is about Storm vs. Roode which is still thrown together way faster than it should be.

Here’s the champ to open the show. He talks about respect because this is TNA. You say yes ma’am and no sir and you hold the door open for a lady. He talks about how he’s not going to be a champion that fights seven days a week because he watches football on Saturdays and Sunday is for church. Storm says he’s been around the world six times and there’s been one man at his side every time.

Cue Roode to a nice pop. Storm says they’re fighting tonight and his daughter wants to hold the belt after they go to Chuck E. Cheese. Roode says exactly what you would expect him to say. It’s the we’ve been friends forever and we’ll steal the show tonight jazz.

Ronnie from the Jersey Shore is here with Eric Young because TNA thinks we care.

Knockout Tag Titles: Tara/Brooke Tessmacher vs. Gail Kim/Madison Rayne

Time for the monthly defense of the titles. Brooke’s outfit is designed like a Texas flag for some reason. She and Madison start us off but it’s off to Tara quickly. The arm work begins as the champions are tagging fast. Gail comes in and is all dominant and evil for a bit. Tessmacher’s corner hijinks don’t really work this time. Gail beats on Brooke a bit more until it’s a hot tag to Tara. Everything breaks down and there’s the Widow’s Peak. Karen Jarrett has the referee though and Eat Defeat gives us new champions at 5:05.

Rating: D+. It’s not like anyone cares about the belts, but this is what you do with the titles here as they’re actually having a division wide angle going on. Karen is evil and trying to have her girls get the titles. It’s not particularly interesting but a dull story is better than a repetitive one on a treadmill like the Divas have so this was fine, just not that interesting.

Garrett Bischoff won’t apologize to his father tonight.

Garrett is in the ring after a break and calls his dad down to the ring. Garrett apologizes for not being the man his father wanted to be but he’s most sorry he didn’t do this years ago. With that he blasts his dad and beats him down until Flair and Gunner make the save.

Joe comes up to Sting and offers help with whatever Sting might need. Sting says it’s cool as there’s no Bischoff to mess with anything right now. Joe says he’s not going to be shut up even with a new sheriff in town. If Sting doesn’t respect Joe, there might be some mysterious injuries. Sting says cool. Joe leaves and here are Bischoff and Flair. Bischoff says Sting can’t fire him so Eric wants a match: his son against someone to be named later. If Sting grants it, Sting can rewrite Eric’s contract.

Daniels says that he’s awesome and beat AJ and never said he quit. He wants title shots because he’s earned them. Daniels says he beat RVD last week. As he’s talking, RVD pops up behind him but Daniels doesn’t see him. He goes on a rant about the screwdriver last week (Daniels that is) and the cameraman asks Rob if he has any thoughts. The thought is a right hand and a brawl breaks out. RVD beats him up and Daniels runs. RVD implies there’s a match at Turning Point.

Jesse Sorensen vs. Austin Aries

Non-title here. Kid Kash sits down on commentary to rant about old vs. new as usual. They speed things up a lot and Kash is already on my nerves. Sorensen misses a dive to the floor and Aries hits a GREAT suicide dive as Sorensen was flattened against the barricade. Kash spends the whole match ranting about how great he is and how he’ll be respected and all that jazz. Sorensen starts his comeback which doesn’t last long. Aries takes over again and hits a running dropkick in the corner to put Sorensen down. He loads up the brainbuster but Sorensen grabs a small package for the pin at 4:45.

Rating: C+. That dive really was awesome and a lot of this grade is for that. They beat on each other out there and it was a pretty fun match. They kept it short which is the right idea for X-Division matches as it keeps them from getting dull. Fun little match and it gives Aries a new opponent. Keep Kash away from anything that amplifies his voice though.

Post match Kash threatens to cut Sorensen with a knife.

Storm says the title is his and he’s keeping it.

Roode says this is the match they’ve talked about for years.

Here are the Robs for the Jersey Shore segment. Robbie E runs down Ronnie and Young (who are in the ring now) and I guess this is going to be a tag match. Oh joy. Robbie keeps calling people hamsters. A brawl breaks out and it’s Big Rob dominating. Ronnie gets whipped by a belt and the heels leave. Eric gets up and suggests a tag match.

Bully Ray/Jeff Jarrett vs. Mr. Anderson/Jeff Hardy

Anderson looks like he has darker hair now. No complains about the double feuds in one match. Ray vs. Hardy starts us off and they trade some shots. Off to Jarrett but that goes nowhere either. Ray comes in and hammers away as Hardy does what he does best: sell things like death. Jeff finally gets the tag off to Anderson as Ray comes in as well. Everything breaks down and here’s Scott Steiner to break things up and crotch Anderson for the DQ at 5:38.

Rating: D+. The main event better be good and I think that’s what they’re setting up for here. Everything else has been really short and it looks like they’re setting up for a huge title match to close the show which is fine. This set up both presumable PPV matches (though do we need more Anderson vs. Ray?) which is always a good idea. Boring match though.

Sting comes up to Garrett in the back and says he’s known him since he was 6 years old. That might raise a few questions but I’m not sure if it does or not. Garrett says he’ll take the match with whoever his dad picks.

Here’s Morgan who calls out Crimson. Morgan talks about how he’s always hearing about how he’s always being asked if he can beat Crimson. He talks about how he’s the real giant in pro wrestling and says let’s give the fans what they want. Crimson says he’s been thinking about it too, but let’s raise the stakes. That means…let’s just have a match. Ok then.

Hype video for the title match.

TNA World Title: James Storm vs. Bobby Roode

Feeling out process to start as they’re playing up the idea that they know each other very well. Off to a test of strength which doesn’t last long. Neither guy has an advantage as we go to a break. Back with Storm ramming shoulders into Roode in the corner. They keep countering each other and Roode can’t get much of an advantage. Storm stays ahead with a superplex but both guys are down.

They slug it out and Storm takes over with some running shots. Blockbuster gets two for Roode. Backstabber gets two for the champ. Eye of the Storm is countered into a spinebuster for two. They head to the floor and both guys barely get back inside in time. Storm tries an Orton DDT but gets countered into a Crossface. Storm makes a rope and Roode is frustrated. Roode tries a superplex but Storm counters into a top rope elbow for two.

This is getting good. Last Call misses as Roode grabs the fisherman’s suplex. Storm counters that and is almost sent into the referee. The referee avoids the contact but twists his knee in the process as Roode is sent to the floor. Roode succumbs to the demons inside and grabs the beer bottle which he breaks over Storm’s head to BIG heat. It gives him the world title at 17:40.

Rating: B. This was a very solid match that could have easily main evented a PPV with about five minutes extra. Still though, good stuff here and that’s what they needed to do. I’m really not sure I like the ending but it’s TNA after all so how good can it get? The heel turn was needed, but Roode is going to have to step up his emotions as a heel to deserve this spot. Good match though.

Overall Rating: C+. The title change alone makes this worth checking out. As is almost always the case with TNA, the end result is fine but the path of getting there is bad. The problem is that this could have been a PPV main event easily but instead it’s thrown together here on a week’s notice. The heel turn is a good thing as there isn’t really a top heel coming into this show so Roode gives you that guy. Decent stuff, but it’s strictly a one match show.

Results
Gail Kim/Madison Rayne b. Brooke Tessmacher/Tara – Eat Defeat to Tara
Jesse Sorensen b. Austin Aries – Small Package
Mr. Anderson/Jeff Hardy b. Bully Ray/Jeff Jarrett via DQ when Scott Steiner interfered
Bobby Roode b. James Storm – Pin after a beer bottle to the head

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Impact Wrestling
Date: October 27, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

We’re in the James Storm as champion era now which is what a lot of fans have wanted to have happen for a very long time now. It’s nice to have some fresh blood in there because there’s no reason to have Angle as champion anymore. His reign was becoming stale so having the change was a good thing. That being said, let’s see if TNA can keep up their hot streak. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s title change as Storm won the world title in a shocker, providing you don’t read spoilers.

Here’s the champ to open the show with a new video, a new song and the belt. He talks about watching Wrestlemania III with his dad and saying he wanted to be a pro wrestler. He couldn’t do it without all of the fans. However there’s another group of guys he wants to thank, so get out here Fourtune. Storm wants to set a few things right, and that means Roode gets the first shot at the title.

That brings out Joe of all people. He says he used to be part of the group that was always held down. James has broken out of that role though because he’s now the champion. Joe sees the same four people before he got that belt. He looks at Fourtune and sees a group trying to keep it all in the family. Incest is implied. Storm says Joe hasn’t earned anything so why is he running his mouth? Joe says because Storm is about to give the title shot to a failure.

Cue Sting who makes Roode vs. Joe for the title shot tonight. The winner gets the title match next week.

Hardy vs. Ray tonight in his first match since March.

Daniels says he didn’t say he quit at BFG. AJ doctored audio allegedly, which is what Rock/the Corporation did in 99. He fights Van Dam next.

Christopher Daniels vs. Rob Van Dam

Feeling out process to start with both of them having control for a bit each time. AJ pops in for commentary a few minutes into things. Standing moonsault gets two for Van Dam but Daniels takes over again with a release Rock Bottom. BME doesn’t hit so Van Dam fires off some kicks. He loads up Rolling Thunder but Daniels rolls to the floor. Van Dam is like whatever man and dives out to take Daniels down again. Five Star misses but RVD lands on his feet. They go to the floor where Daniels finds a tool box. A shot to the ribs of RVD draws the DQ at 5:23.

Rating: C-. I don’t get the appeal of Daniels. The guy bores me to death every time I see him out there. He’s glued to AJ’s hip which isn’t helping him at all either. Get the two of them apart and let Daniels face someone else. ANYONE else. Not a bad match here, but I didn’t want to watch it at all, especially since it’s just leading to more AJ vs. Daniels.

AJ comes down for the save from a screwdriver.

Here are Gail, Karen, Madison and Traci. Gail talks about how she did what everyone told her to do for years until Karen brought her back and told her that it’s all about Gail. Karen makes Gail vs. Velvet for the title at Turning Point. Gail says get someone out here for her to beat up.

Gail Kim vs. Tara

Gail jumps her to start and it’s all her in the opening. Tara is sent to the floor and Traci is yelled at for trying to help her. After a break we’re back with Gail still in total control. Tara fires off some basic stuff but Gail uses the same finisher she used back in WWE, which is that boot to the jaw where she drops the other girl down onto the side of her boot. That’s good for the pin at 6:57.

Rating: D+. Same thing as before here, although the legs looked better in this. Gail practically squashing Tara isn’t something I expected. Not that Gail shouldn’t have squashed someone, but is there really no one else? Gee I guess there actually isn’t. At least it wasn’t ODB or Jackie.

Bischoff and Flair are here. Didn’t they hate each other or something like 13 years ago?

TV Title: Eric Young vs. Robbie E

Eric starts by locking up with the referee and now we’re ready to go. Eric gets a sunset flip for two. A crucifix ends this at 1:00.

Rob Terry and Robbie E beat Young down with little Rob saying he’ll win the belt. Eric gets on the mic and says a Jersey Shore guy is coming next week.

Daniels is on the phone and says he wants his title match after beating RVD. Kaz comes in and says he wants AJ and Daniels to make up. He offers Daniels a mini vacation in California and Daniels says he’ll call him about it.

Ray says he’s going to take care of Hardy tonight and make his first match back his last.

Garrett Bischoff recaps the story of his dad making him be all evil. I’m not sure I buy that but it works for a backstory.

Here’s Eric who says he has important family business to take care of tonight. He calls out Garrett and after awhile here he is. Eric talks about how he raised Garrett to follow him instead of to think for himself. He says about what you would expect him to say to his son. Garrett says this isn’t what he wanted. Eric says he has half an hour to either apologize or it’s child abuse time.

We cut to Flair in the back where he rants about Garrett a bit and says he’s going to yell at him.

After a break Flair and Garrett miss up (Garrett: “Yes Mr. Flair?” Flair: “Not Mr. Flair. God.”) and Flair says Garrett is a punk. He rants for a long while more and says he might beat Garrett up later.

We recap Jeff Hardy’s return and all of the people reacting to him. Jeff Jarrett’s voice is over the video, talking about how no one wants him here.

Here’s Jarrett who says someone forgot a piece of video in that package. He’s talking about Victory Road which Jarrett will never forget. We also can’t air the main event of Turning Point 2006 when Jeff no showed there too. That brings out Hardy for another pull apart brawl. Bully Ray jumps Hardy and it’s time for their match.

Jeff Hardy vs. Bully Ray

Ray gets in a chain shot and we go to a break almost immediately. Back with Hardy hammering away a bit and hitting a Whisper in the Wind. Twist of Fate is countered and Ray hits a big boot to take him down. Ray pounds him down and a big elbow drop gets two as does an avalanche splash. He hammers in with some crossface shots but a charge gets feet in the corner. There’s a Matt screaming legdrop for two. Twist of Fate and Swanton give him the clean pin at 9:42.

Rating: C. It wasn’t that good of a match, but for a return by Jeff this was a decent enough performance. They kept Hardy to what he does best (selling) and only had him hit high spots. This wasn’t that bad for the most part and for a meaningless match, it was a good way to get Jeff back into the ring with someone he’s familiar with.

Jeff is being interviewed post match and Jarrett comes through the crowd to blast him. Immortal sets to put him through a table but Anderson makes the save.

Roode says this is another obstacle in his way and he’ll go through Joe tonight.

Robert Roode vs. Samoa Joe

Roode has a new entrance as well. Winner gets the shot against Storm next week. They take turns beating each other down in the corner and Roode gets a neckbreaker for one. Crossface is countered as Joe heads to the floor. Joe hooks him into some chinlocks on the mat but Roode fights up and hits the spinebuster.

They slug it out and Roode gets the best of that because he’s the good guy. Blockbuster gets two but Joe escapes the Payoff. Death Valley Driver gets two for the fat boy. MuscleBuster is countered into a crossface but Joe escapes. Joe goes after the knee but Roode snaps off a fisherman’s suplex for the pin at 7:00.

Rating: C. Not a bad match again but nothing of note. Was there ever any doubt that Roode would win? I have no idea why they’re using Roode vs. Storm so quickly. That could be BFG next year or Lockdown or something but instead, we get it next week at a show that has already been taped. Nice to see them having this huge match after such great build right?

Storm comes out for the post match staredown.

Here’s Bischoff (older version) for the big showdown with his son. As he’s coming to the ring, it’s announced that next week that we get Hardy/Anderson vs. Ray/Jarrett. Eric calls out his boy and is all happy because he’s sure Garrett is going to apologize. Garrett says nothing and Eric gets testy. Eric keeps shoving him and saying to apologize until Garrett grabs him with a fist pulled back.

That brings out Flair because he has to be out here for some reason. He rants and raves for a bit until Garrett hits him. Eric hits him low and Garrett gets beaten down. Remember, this is what is ending the show. My goodness. Flair and Eric stand tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was boring. That’s the only way to describe it. The matches were all just ok, the main event for next week was built along with some other stories but it was nothing interesting, and the focus is right back on Bischoff and Flair and whatever their drama of the week is. I don’t know who they think they’re drawing to the show with a 62 year old vs. the non-wrestling son of an executive, but I don’t think it’s too many people. Bad show this week.

Results
Rob Van Dam b. Christopher Daniels via DQ when Daniels hit Van Dam with a toolbox
Gail Kim b. Tara – Eat Defeat
Eric Young b. Robbie E – Crucifix
Jeff Hardy b. Bully Ray – Swanton Bomb
Bobby Roode b. Samoa Joe – Fisherman’s Suplex

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