WrestleReunion VI
Date: January 28, 2012
Location: The Westin Los Angeles Airport, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 900
Commentators: Excalibur, Marty DeRosa

I’m not completely sure on the name of this show as I’ve seen it as both WrestleReunion VI and Pro Wrestling Superstars: Los Angeles but I’ll take the one with Roman numerals. As you can probably guess, it’s a big time indy reunion show featuring a bunch of wrestlers from years past, which can make for some interesting matchups but often some lackluster performances. Let’s get to it.

Here are Mick Foley and Mike Tyson to open things up so there is certainly some star power. Foley talks about his history with Tyson and mentions being a guest referee tonight. Now usually he promises to call a match right down the line and tonight he’s refereeing the New Age Outlaws vs. the Steiner Brothers. This time though Foley needs our help “because Rick Steiner has never liked me and Scotty is out of his f****** mind.” I’ve been watching Mick Foley for about thirty years and I don’t think I can remember three times I’ve heard him use an F bomb. I mean he’s right, but it’s rare.

Usually he’s going to get physically involved, but tonight he isn’t crazy enough to do that. This time though, he has Mike Tyson watching his back so he’s safe to head to St. Louis for the Royal Rumble (that gets a heck of a pop). Tyson takes the mic and talks about various wrestlers he likes, including Billy Graham and Sid Vicious. I really can’t make out most of what he’s saying, but that’s Tyson for you.

We get our first commentary and…..well actually Excalibur is quite good at this kind of show so it should be fine.

Arik Royal vs. Adam Page

This is one of the things I love about watching old shows because Page is 21 years old here and absolutely nothing. Excalibur tells DeRosa to calm down a bit and save some energy, which makes me chuckle for reasons of the future. The bigger Royal goes after the arm to start as commentary actually talks about something interesting, with a discussion of the pressure of having to follow Foley and Tyson.

Royal hits a headscissors into an armdrag but misses the backsplash, allowing Page to miss a standing shooting star. We get a standoff for a bit until Royal nails a spinwheel kick. Royal goes up but dives into a dropkick to the floor. Page tries a running shooting star off the apron and hits Royal’s chest with his head for a nearly terrifying landing. Page takes his necklace back and goes inside…..but we’ve got VADER. I think we’ll call this a no contest at about 4:00 as this is going to be a massacre.

Rating: C-. The ratings are going to be a little bit lighter this time around as this is a one off legends show and not about the match quality. I’ve seen Royal before and he did fine in both matches so he seems to have a little something going for him. Then there’s Page, who would go on to become a huge star on national television. That’s one of the things I love about watching a show like this: seeing someone who is nothing here but would go on to bigger things. Not much of a match of course, but VADER, so we’re fine.

Royal jumps Page post match….and then decides to go after Vader. Well maybe that’s why Page became a bigger star. Vader runs him over so Page tries to come in for a German suplex. Excalibur: “ARE YOU ANTONIO INOKI PAGE???” Destruction ensues but Royal gets up to help double team Vader in the corner.

A double suplex isn’t happening though and Vader mauls Royal again. Royal manages to trap Vader’s arms so Page can go up….but then Vader breaks free and hits Royal in the head. Page gets caught on top and it’s there’s a Vader Bomb. Royal gets chokeslammed and Page gets powerbombed as the Vader stuff went on a good bit longer than the match itself.

New Age Outlaws vs. Steiner Brothers

The only meeting ever here, with Mick Foley (“The hardcore legend and friend of Mike Tyson!”) as guest referee. Road Dogg does his usual stuff and hands it off to Billy Gunn to take it home. Gunn: “IF YA SMELL……” Hang on because that’s not right. Gunn knows he screwed up so let’s try it again. Gunn: “AND THAT’S THE BOTTOM….” No again, but he gets it right on the third time. You can tell he’s serious here too because he’s in the Kip James trunks. Then we get very serious because Scott Steiner grabs the mic and drops his first homophobic slur of the night.

We get a few F bombs to the fans and it’s time to go. Actually hang on because Foley realizes that he’s in over his head here and says he’ll be cowering in the corner. Billy and Scott finally get things going with Scott unloading in the corner. Well at least hitting some slow knees to the ribs. Billy fights out of the corner by punching Scott in the face and it’s off to Dogg. Rick comes in with a double clothesline though and we get the old Steiner Brothers pose.

The Outlaws bail to the floor (Wouldn’t you?) until we settle down to Rick biting Dogg’s pants in the corner. That’s enough to send Dogg outside to ring the bell because he isn’t standing for Rick’s tongue going…..uh, somewhere. Dogg: “I’m not saying we can’t have a drink later and talk about it, but in here, I’m not standing for it!” Ring announcer: “Ladies and gentlemen, referee Mick Foley has just informed me that he is authorizing tongue in the a** for this match!”

We settle back to Rick backing Billy into the corner, with Gunn’s trunks coming down a good bit in the process. Gunn gets in a right hand but misses a charge in the corner, allowing Rick to bite him right in the middle of the back of the trunks. That sends Gunn over to grab Dogg around the waist, giving us the expected reaction. It’s off to Dogg, who wants Scott for no logical reason. He has to stay with Rick, who he drives into the Steiner corner so Scott can come in for some shots to the ribs. Well he got what he wanted.

Dogg’s bouncing punches manage to put Scott down for two, with the fans saying YOU STILL GOT IT. I’ll let you figure out which one they’re talking about. Scott is back with a spinning belly to belly suplex and Rick gets in some choking from the apron. Foley: “MIKE TYSON FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHERE ARE YOU???” Scott suplexes Dogg and goes into the pushups, earning a cheer despite not being so nice earlier in the night.

Rick slaps on the crossface of all things as Marty gets his Mike Tyson history wrong (by saying that Mike Tyson called Steve Austin “Cold Stone” on Raw when it was at the Royal Rumble). Dogg fights up and gets the hot tag off to Gunn for some house cleaning. The belly to belly cuts that off and it’s time for Scott to get in Foley’s face. That means Mr. Socko…..who goes flying after a single Scott glare. The distraction lets Gunn hit the Fameasser for a pretty fast three at 11:32.

Rating: C. All things considered, this was not half bad whatsoever. They were actually working a bit and while of course it wasn’t great (they’re old and mainly retired), they did some goofy stuff to bridge the gap. The Foley being scared stuff helped a lot and I liked it well enough. For a one off dream match, I’ve seen far, far worse.

Post match Rick finds Socko and has some Alex flashbacks (look it up).

Colt Cabana vs. Fit Finlay

Under World Of Sport (British) rules and a fan who won an auction gets to handle the introductions. There are three five minute rounds and you can win by pin, submission or knockout. There are no closed fists allowed either, which probably won’t make that much of a difference but it’s certainly a rule. Another fan gets to be Cabana’s corner man but Cabana says we’re about two minutes away. The referee goes over the rules, with Cabana asking if a kick low is legal (Cabana: “WHAT ABOUT A KICK TO THE D***?”).

We get the bell to start the first round, as commentary still hasn’t actually explained the rules here. Finlay grabs Cabana’s leg so Cabana bails into the corner in a hurry as commentary explains the idea of the Troubles in Northern Ireland. A shot to the face rocks Cabana again and the corner man has to check on his face.

That seems to be ok so Finlay takes him down into a toehold. Finlay grabs a nerve hold and ribs at Cabana’s face because he’s kind of an awesome villain. Back up and Finlay starts in on the arm, with commentary almost calling Finlay a grizzled young veteran (like that would ever work for a UK wrestler). Cabana finally comes back with a headlock takeover and one fan calls it boring. Round one ends but Cabana doesn’t want to let go of the headlock that he worked so hard to get in the first place.

After the corner man gives Cabana some water and towels him down, we’re ready to go with round two. Some uppercuts rock Cabana as Excalibur says he suffers from knowitallism. Finlay stomps on the fingers and kicks him in the face before sending Cabana outside for a needed breather. The corner man adds some slaps (despite NOT being in the corner) and we get some Cabana sneering. Finlay heads outside to yell at a fan so Cabana tells the corner man to slap Finlay in the face.

Thankfully that isn’t going to happen so Finlay doesn’t get to do something so horrible that I can’t come up with a good metaphor for the level of violence. Back in and Finlay hits some elbows to send him outside, setting up a whip into the barricade. They get back inside for some arm cranking/stomping into a keylock to keep Cabana down. The round ends with Finlay evening things up by not letting go of the arm either, which does not seem good for Cabana either.

Finlay goes extra evil by jumping Cabana during his meeting with the corner man. The Fujiwara armbar goes on to start the third round but Cabana fights up. That earns him an arm first whip into the corner and it’s back to the armbar with a knee in the shoulder. A Jake Roberts short arm clothesline sets up the running seated senton but Cabana reverses into a sunset flip for a creative counter. The Flying Apple (which might not have been named yet) connects but it’s too early for the Billy Goat’s Curse. Finlay kicks him shoulder first into the post and then does it again for a bonus. The Celtic Cross finishes Cabana at 15:16.

Rating: C. This didn’t really feel like some kind of special British match as it was really just Finlay working the arm and the a regular finish. The rounds didn’t change much either and I was a bit disappointed with the whole thing. It was fine as a regular match, but they seemed to be going for something special here and it just wasn’t there.

7OH!4 vs. Unholy Alliance

7OH!4 is Caleb Konley/Cedric Alexander, with commentary saying they are the next CM Punk/Colt Cabana or Motor City Machine Guns. Eh they were names but hold on a second there. The Alliance is Tajiri/Mikey Whipwreck, former ECW Tag Team Champions but unfortunately minus James Mitchell/Sinister Minister. Konley grabs a wristlock on Mikey to start but he’s right back with a hiptoss into a headscissors despite not being the size of a guy you would expect to use a headscissors.

We hear about some rookie named Zack Ryder to come out of Mikey’s school as Tajiri comes in to a rather big reaction. Tajiri misses a swinging kick to Alexander’s face so it’s a hammerlock to take Alexander down instead. Back up and Alexander’s headlock doesn’t work and Tajiri starts firing off the kicks to the arm. Mikey comes in to pick Alexander up so Tajiri can nail a dropkick to the face. There’s a double gutbuster to Konley and stereo kicks to the head have him on the floor as the fans are rather pleased.

Mikey’s slingshot dive takes out both of them and the referee begins a rather slow count. Tajiri however won’t dive so Mikey comes back in and gets enziguried into a Downward Spiral for two (with Excalibur getting in the beta version of combiNATION, because I can’t escape the thing). Konley grabs the cravate to hold Mikey down for a bit, followed by the basement clothesline to give Alexander two. Tajiri spits at Alexander (with commentary thinking it’s Konley) and it’s a double Russian legsweep to drop Mikey for two.

Hold on though as Tajiri comes in to….pull Mikey’s pants up and then head back to the apron. Well at least he’s polite. Embracing the power of raised pants, Mikey superkicks Alexander (THE PANTS WORKED!) and it’s back to Tajiri to clean house. Everything breaks down and Tajiri’s superkick gets tow on Konley. Mikey snaps off a pretty nice Frankensteiner on Alexander and a low makes it worse. The referee checks on Alexander and Tajiri mists Konley, setting up the Whippersnapper for the pin at 10:19.

Rating: C+. I know Mikey and Tajiri were a big deal in the dying days of ECW but they were a rather nice team who still looked good here. You don’t get something like that very often and it was fun to see them working so well. Alexander and Konley were still really young here so losing to a team with some credibility, even if it was twelve years old at this point, was fine. Pretty good match here too so well done on a little surprise.

Demus 3:16 vs. Mascarita Dorado

Minis match and Dorado is better known as El Torito. Demus is a good bit bigger and is probably about Rey Mysterio size. A wristdrag takes Demus down to start and frustration is already setting in. Demus knocks him down without much effort so Dorado starts rolling around as we hear about the WWF Light Heavyweight division. Dorado pulls him into the cross armbreaker but Demus powers him up with ease because the size difference is a bit much here.

Back up and a rather spinning headscissors sends Demus outside, setting up the big suicide dive. Dorado manages to throw him back inside for a fireman’s carry, which is a little more impressive than you might think. A fireman’s carry slam sets up a moonsault but the second moonsault only hits raised boots. Demus grabs a tilt-a-whirl into a Dominator (cool) and there’s a giant swing to send Dorado down again. They head outside with Dorado being dropped onto the timekeeper’s table and Demus takes him back in for a pop up powerslam.

There’s a heck of a toss as Excalibur talks about Wolverine debuting back in the 1960s. Dorado bounces up out of the corner with a double springboard headbutt, followed by a crazy spinning (as in he spins around Demus about ten times) into a headscissors to the floor. That earns the HOLY S*** chant, setting up the top rope hurricanrana to take Demus down again. Back in and a top rope hurricanrana, with Dorado landing on his feet because, sets up another very spinning hurricanrana into a small package for the pin at 8:04.

Rating: C+. Yeah this was fun and Dorado is one of those things that has to be seen to be believed. He can do all kinds of stuff out there and makes it look easy, which is about as cool as you can get. Demus was a good target for Dorado as he is so much bigger, allowing Dorado to do all of his spots out there. Throw in getting in and out fairly fast and this was a lot of fun. Not great, but it was the kind of match that fit in perfectly on a show like this.

Dorado having a salsa version of the Mission Impossible theme makes it even better. The fans throw in the money so Dorado slaps him in the face with a dollar. That might seem rude, but Demus picks the dollar up and, ahem, cleans himself with it so Dorado is better….I guess?

Tommy Dreamer vs. Kevin Steen

Street fight and for you younger people, Steen is better known as Kevin Owens. The fans seem split here and it’s an exchange of hammerlocks to start. Dreamer’s shoulder bounces off of Steen (Steen: “IN YOUR DREAMS!”) and it’s time to hammer on Dreamer for a bit. Steen drop toeholds him down and hits the flipping legdrop to the back of Dreamer’s head. Back up and Dreamer kicks him low in the corner to send Steen outside, setting up the running flip dive off the apron.

A bottle of water to the head rocks Steen again but Dreamer gets crotched on the barricade because Dreamer spends too much time pointing at the crowd (as Dreamer tends to do). They brawl through the crowd and Steen hits him over the back with a well stolen crutch. Dreamer gets taken up onto a camera table and gets knocked down onto (not through) another table in a big crash. Back into the crowd with Dreamer hitting him in the head with a Steen DVD.

Dreamer sends him into the barricade and then heads backstage to grab the usual assortment of weapons. A hockey stick to the back rocks Steen again and there’s….something made of wood over Steen’s head. Dreamer gets sent into a plastic tray in the corner and Steen hits him in the knee with a stick. The Sharpshooter goes on (because Steen is Canadian) but is broken up in a hurry. Dreamer misses a charge into the post so Steen puts a stop sign over him to set up the Cannonball, which is not the brightest move in the world.

That lets Steen tie him in the Tree of Woe and this isn’t going to end well. Indeed, as Steen hits a running dropkick to a chair in the face. Commentary starts making Steven Segal references as Dreamer catches him on top with a superplex. Dreamer wins the big slugout so Steen goes low in a smart move. The Even Flow gets two but Dreamer catches him on top to break up a moonsault.

Now it’s Steen in the Tree of Woe so Dreamer can hit him low with a stick. There’s the running basement dropkick to drive a stop sign into Steen’s face and now it’s time to grab a piece of barricade. That takes too long though and Steen superkicks him off the apron. The fans want to see someone use a hammer but they settle for Dreamer kicking a rope for a low blow. With nothing else working, one of the fans gives Dreamer a HUGE hammer, which he uses to crush the bell between Steen’s legs. Steen is fine enough to shove Dreamer onto the piece of barricade inside and a Swanton finishes Dreamer at 19:24.

Rating: B-. This was a pretty hard hitting street fight, though it did run a good bit longer than it should have. What mattered here was the idea of the old hardcore legend vs. the new breed and that worked out rather well. I’m not wild on these matches most of the time but this one was pretty fun, which is about all you can hope for in this kind of a situation.

Post match Steen is ready to say something to Dreamer but Raven runs in to hit Steen low and DDT Dreamer for old times’ sake. Steen to Raven: “You’re a f****** a**hole!” Steen to Dreamer: “Thank you.”

Intermission, which is cut from the video.

Roderick Strong vs. Jake Manning

Manning is an adult Manscout and comes out to a John Cougar Mellencamp song, which I believe was used in the Waterboy. After Manning gives the referee some lessons on how to properly call a match, he takes Strong down to the mat for a headscissors. They grapple on the mat for a bit with Strong getting the better of things but that is broken up in a hurry. Manning takes him back down by the arm as commentary talks about how it might be difficult to find footage on Manning, who rarely leaves the southeast.

Strong is back up with a shot to the face and unloads with the chops in the corner. A belly to back suplex sets up a chinlock on Manning but he’s right back up with a kick to the face. Manning drops an elbow for two and drives Strong into the corner for the choking. They head outside with Manning sending him into the apron for two, setting up the next chinlock. That’s broken up as well and they go with a pinfall reversal sequence for some near falls each. Strong is back up with a dropkick and they’re both down for a breather.

It’s Strong up first with a bunch of running forearms into a belly to back suplex for two more. Manning comes back with an (oddly appropriate for reasons that I can’t figure out) airplane spin. Strong isn’t having that and hammers away but Manning is right back with a backbreaker into a Downward Spiral for three. Only two of them count though due to the foot being on the rope though, meaning Strong can come back with an enziguri. The Angle Slam gets two and it’s the backbreaker into the Sick Kick to finish Manning at 11:04.

Rating: C+. This is the kind of match that I like to see on a show like this, as Strong is a much bigger name than Manning but they went back and forth well enough here to make you believe that Manning could pull it off. The match worked well as Strong can have a good match against anyone and Manning held up his end despite being known for little more than his gimmick. Good stuff here, with a nice battle of the generations.

Davey Richards vs. Harry Smith

That would be Davey Boy Smith Jr., freshly released from WWE, and this could be interesting. They go with the technical exchange to start (shocking I know) with Richards getting him down into a modified surfboard and rolling him up for two. That’s broken up for a standoff and they lock up, with Smith absolutely towering over Richards. It’s back to the mat with Smith grabbing a short armscissors and rolling him around a bit.

That’s reversed into something like an Indian Deathlock from Richards to crank on the leg. Make that a Muta Lock with commentary thinking Richards would do well at Subway. Smith slips out and cranks him down by the arm, setting up a full nelson. That’s broken up as well as Richards rolls out with an armdrag, only to get pulled into a spinning belly to belly for two. More arm cranking has Richards down again but he sends Smith to the floor. There’s the running kick to the chest from the apron, setting up the suicide dive.

Back in and a missile dropkick sends Smith into the corner. It’s time to start working on the leg, with Davey kicking away and grabbing a Trailer Hitch. Richards stomps on both knees at once and it’s a dragon screw legwhip into a half crab. Now it’s an STF as the fans start shouting various things. Smith fights up and kicks him into the corner, setting up a powerslam for two.

Smith crotches him on top and grabs a delayed superplex for a slightly delayed near fall. A superkick and a powerbomb give Smith two more each but Richards kicks him down again. The top rope double stomp gets two and we hit the ankle lock. That’s broken up with a roll into the post, allowing Smith to grab a cross armbreaker. Richards rolls into another ankle lock, which Smith reverses into one of his own.

The grapevined version is countered into a Sharpshooter, which Smith reverses into his own Sharpshooter. Smith grabs a small package for two but Richards BLASTS him with a knee for the same. Back up and Smith tries a powerbomb but Richards reverses into a sunset flip. Smith sits down on it ala his dad against Bret Hart, only to have Richards slip out into a cradle for the pin at 17:26.

Rating: B. It was good action throughout and Smith looked good in defeat, but egads I had forgotten how hard it is to get invested in a Richards match. He is so ultra serious all the time, though at least he wasn’t doing his “get kicked in the head and scream a lot without selling anything” and writing it off as strong style. This got the crowd going and I certainly didn’t hate it though, which is some high praise for a Richards match.

Post match Richards says he can’t believe the people up north let Smith go. Richards talks about the similarities between the two of them, including idolizing the same people growing up. Respect is shown and Smith says it’s better to hear these fans chant his name instead of Michael Cole every Monday night. Wrestling will always be #1 for him, even if he jumps into MMA (which he didn’t).

El Generico/Great Sasuke vs. Young Bucks

The Bucks are actually young here and come out to MMMBop, which is rather frustrating. Matt does the Randy Savage finger spin and Nick parodies the Spinarooni (there’s your 90s reference). The fans go NUTS for Generico and it’s a shame that he retired so soon after this. You know Excalibur is right there with all of the Sasuke history because this is his thing.

Generico reveals a half Generico/Sasuke mask and takes Nick down to start. An exchange of wristlocks goes nowhere so Nick drives him into the corner and starts in on the arm again. We hear about how completely and utterly amazing the Bucks are as Sasuke comes in to headlock Nick. Some kicks to the ribs have little effect on Sasuke (the only time Sasuke and Rick Rude will be compared), who elbows Nick in the head. Generico comes back in and gets taken into the corner so Matt can talk a lot of trash.

A few quick armdrags have Matt in trouble as we hear about Sasuke making a documentary about mouthwash (or something). Generico hammers away on Matt in the corner and fires off chops against the ropes for a bonus. Matt is back with the headscissors to hold Generico in place, allowing Nick to kick him in the mask and into the barricade. Back in and Matt laughs at Generico, setting up the slow motion stomping.

We hit the front facelock until Nick comes back in for some shots in the corner. A handspring rake to the back sets up a slingshot hilo as Excalibur talks about how the Young Bucks have a supernatural feel for the DMZ on the thirty third parallel in the ring. Generico rakes the Bucks’ chests to escape but it’s still too early for the tag. Matt’s waistlock keeps Generico in trouble but he manages the exploder suplex into the corner.

That’s enough for the hot tag to Sasuke to clean house as everything breaks down. Sasuke dropkicks Nick through the ropes and Generico hits the big running flip dive to crush Matt. Back in and a Blockbuster gets two on Matt and Sasuke takes a LONG time to go up for a Ram Jam (from The Wrestler), allowing Matt to roll away. The Bucks take turns kicking Sasuke in the back of the trunks but it’s back to Generico for the Blue Thunder Bomb to Nick.

The Helluva Kick is broken up but Nick kicks Matt in the head but mistake. Sasuke crushes Nick with a springboard missile dropkick, only to have Nick low bridge him to the floor. A wheelbarrow faceplant gives Matt two on Generico and Risky Business gets the same. More Bang For Your Buck is countered into a half and half suplex and Sasuke is back with a powerbomb to Nick. Matt superkicks Sasuke though and everyone is down again.

Nick comes back in to knee Sasuke off the apron but Generico sends Nick’s kick into Matt’s head. You know the Bucks aren’t selling that though and it’s a double superkick into the assisted Tombstone for two on Generico with Sasuke making another save. Nick misses a moonsault and Sasuke hits a big flip dive onto Matt on the floor. That gets the fans back into it and Generico’s Swanton gets two on Nick. Now the Helluva Kick can connect to set up the brainbuster onto the buckle to finish Nick at 21:12.

Rating: B. This was better than I was expecting and it was nice to see the Bucks actually lose for a change. You don’t usually see the dream team beating the regular partners so this was quite the surprise. It really is a shame that Generico retired, as he is quite the star. You can see how influential he was too, as a lot of people would copy his style, almost down to the move at times.

Wrestle Royal

20 man Royal Rumble and Ken Shamrock is a ringside enforcer. Matt Classic (I hear Colt Cabana is a big fan) is in at #1 and Lanny Poffo is in at #2 for one of the most unique matches I can remember seeing in a long time. Commentary makes it clear that entrants will be STRICTLY timed, after an apparent issue last year. Classic slowly hammers away at the back and grabs a claw but misses the bottom rope splash. Poffo actually manages the moonsault (not bad for 57) and goes for the mask.

Rock Riddle (the original Mr. Wonderful, who I’ve never actually seen wrestle) is in at #3 as we seem to have 90 second intervals. Riddle doesn’t actually get in the ring as Classic and Poffo continue their slow motion fighting. The timing is already a bit off as Carlos Colon (The Youngster!) is in at #4. Colon gets to hit both guys in the head as commentary continues its running joke of Classic feuding with every old wrestler ever. Riddle finally comes in (I wasn’t betting on the flower print gear) for a few shots of his own as Gangrel is in at #5.

Brawling continues as Gangrel (getting a rather strong reception) bites Poffo in the corner. The clock is even further all over the place as Jesse Hernandez is in at #6. Classic gets beaten up some more but gets choked in the corner by Gangrel. Mando Guerrero is in at #7 and gets quite the reception as he beats on Classic. They finally start teasing some eliminations (and no you cannot expect any kind of serious quality out of this) until Kevin Sullivan is in at #8.

Stick shots abound until Colon headbutts the stick out of Sullivan’s hands. Colon stabs Sullivan in the stomach with said stick and then beats Gangrel in the back. Piloto Suicida (still active today) is in at #9 as the ring is really getting full. The rapid fire entrances (now barely at a minute) continue as Tommy Dreamer is in at #10 (OF COURSE Dreamer is working twice) to hammer on Gangrel as commentary talks about how these two are some of the youngest in the match. Everyone is still in as Dreamer beats on Classic, apparently as payback for all of those boring Madison Square Garden main events.

Robbie E., the reigning TNA TV Champion, is in at #11 and promises to become the youngest ever winner of this match. Then Dreamer tosses him in a hurry for a funny bit. Virgil (to Ted DiBiase’s music) is in at #12 as Poffo, Colon and Guerrero were all put out somewhere. Greg Valentine, coming out to Sharp Dressed Man of all things, is in at #13. Classic is doing Hindu squats as Sullivan hits Suicida with the bell. Valentine has Dreamer in the Figure Four as Gangrel drops elbows.

Konnan is in at #14 to go after Sullivan, with commentary (thankfully) bringing up the Dungeon of Doom. Dan Severn is in at #15 and this could be interesting. Gangrel goes after Severn in a hurry as the ring is too full again. Jimmy Hart, with a lot of padding, of all people is in at #16 and wisely walks around the ring for a bit.

Godfather, with his ladies, is in at #17 and Gangrel eliminates himself to join in. Hart was eliminated off screen and Brutus Beefcake is in at #18 (dang I miss that theme) and goes after Valentine to ruin the Dream Team reunion. Bradley Ray Schreak (an auction winner) is in at #19 as Sullivan is out. Beefcake grabs the sleeper on Schreak as Suicida is out. Schreak gets a haircut, including with the big scissors, as Severn gets rid of Virgil. The match completely stops for the haircut until Schreak wakes up and panics over his hair being gone.

That’s enough for an elimination and it’s Raven in at #20 (with Dreamer waiting on him) to complete the field. The final grouping is Classic, Dreamer, Valentine, Konnan, Severn, Godfather, Beefcake and Raven. Hang on though as Raven doesn’t want to get in, only to have Kevin Steen come out and jump him from behind. Steen throws Raven in for a DDT from Dreamer, who tosses Raven without much trouble. Dreamer, ever the genius, jumps out to beat on Raven some more and beats him to the back with Steen. Classic is eliminated and there goes Konnan.

We’re down to Severn, Valentine, Beefcake and Godfather (I love indy wrestling) but Shamrock distracts Severn, allowing Valentine to toss him. Severn pulls Valentine out and we’re down to two. The Ho Train misses Godfather but he low bridges Beefcake out for the win at 23:12.

Rating: C. Fun. What other word is there to describe something like this? They weren’t trying to do anything serious here and it was all about having people get a quick payoff and come out to a pop. It worked at the Gimmick Battle Royal in 2001 and it works at any show like this. I had a good time with it and that’s the entire point of this kind of match. It’s a lot of fun, and well done on doing what they should have.

The women come in to dance with Godfather, who hits his catchphrase (while clearly having a blast) to wrap up the night.

Overall Rating: B. I’ve seen a good number of these reunion style shows and this was one of the better ones, with a nice mixture of old vs. new and some legends matches thrown in there as well. They had some big names included and while they might have had a better option as the main event (though it did fit the reunion theme), this was a lot of fun. It’s longer than it needs to be (at nearly three and a half hours, not counting intermission), but I had a good time with it and that is entirely the goal with something like this.

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Smackdown
Date: November 15, 2001
Location: Pepsi Arena, Albany, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

This is another request and it’s the go home show for Survivor Series. In other words, it’s all about the WWF vs. the Alliance as there is still the faint hope that the Alliance could pull off a miracle and not get destroyed on Sunday in the Winner Take All match. I’m not sure why this was requested but maybe it’s for a fond farewell. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Rob Van Dam vs. Kane

Van Dam’s Hardcore Title isn’t on the line. Kane shoves him into the corner to start and the stomping is on in a hurry. The gorilla press doesn’t work so Van Dam tries the kicks, only to get clotheslined. The fans are behind Van Dam (in the Alliance mind you) as Kane steps on his back in the corner. Kane drives him back first into the corner but Van Dam kicks him back down. Rolling Thunder gives Van Dam two but Kane is right back with Snake Eyes. Kane catches him on top for a superplex so here’s Booker T. (also Alliance) for a distraction, allowing Van Dam to hit his top rope kick to the chest for the pin.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here but it serves a fine enough purpose of getting you ready for Sunday. This is one where the building momentum actually makes sense and could mean a little something on Sunday, though I doubt Van Dam and Kane are going to be the biggest players in the match.

Post match Undertaker comes out to chase Booker off.

Test is messing with his XBOX when Stacy Keibler (then managing the Dudleys in a nice fit) comes in to ask if he’s ready for their six man. She confirms that he is in fact WAY hotter than Edge.

Chris Jericho comes in to see Rock before their tag team match against Steve Austin and Kurt Angle. They aren’t getting along at the moment and various words are censored. Jericho isn’t going to be attacking him anytime soon because he’ll be leading the WWF into Survivor Series. Rock responds with a knock knock joke about leading the company and making sure Jericho has a job.

Jericho will take Rock out, but he’ll waiting until after Survivor Series. Rock shakes his hand so Jericho goes for the cool handshake, which Rock doesn’t like. See, Jericho is cool like the Fonz….so Rock pretends to shoot a duck and holsters his finger gun? Eh who cares as this was an amazing feud.

Edge/Hardy Boyz vs. Dudley Boyz/Test

Lita and Stacy Keibler are here as this is a preview of two Survivor Series title matches. In other words, ALL SIX are champions, because there were far too many titles around at this point. Bubba shoulders Edge down to start but walks into a flapjack. It’s off to Matt as everything breaks down in a hurry. We settle down to Test clotheslining Matt and hammering him down in the corner. Matt fights out of the corner without much trouble and brings in Jeff (in his snazzy hat) but Bubba elbows him down as well.

A neckbreaker gets two on Jeff and Matt’s failed save attempt lets D-Von hit What’s Up. Bubba misses the middle rope backsplash though and it’s back to Edge to clean house. Everything breaks down with Edge and Jeff taking over, including a big slingshot dive from Jeff to Test…which misses. Stacy gets on the apron for a failed distraction though and Edge spears D-Von down for the pin.

Rating: C. It was certainly action packed and that’s the best thing you can have in a match like this. While there was an absurd number of titles in one match, it always makes sense to tie two feuds into one. The hot sequence at the end helped, but there is only so much you can do with so many people and so little time.

Post match Lita knocks Stacy knocks off the apron and into Matt’s arms. Lita isn’t happy so Matt drops her in a funny bit. The Dudleyz use the distraction to give Lita the 3D with Stacy holding Matt’s leg.

Post break Matt apologizes to Lita and kisses her before having a rather odd look on her face.

Big Show vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Show is dressed as Page, including the rather large, white teeth. The real Page comes out…and gets chokeslammed with one hand for the pin in about thirty seconds.

Post match Shane McMahon runs in to hit Show with a chair.

Paul Heyman runs into Stephanie McMahon’s office and talks about how awesome that was. Stephanie does one of her patented Only Stephanie Talks This Way promos about how great the Alliance is. Heyman is going to call out Vince McMahon, after this segment which was only there to give Stephanie a cameo.

Here’s Heyman to talk about how the Alliance is standing up to the tyranny of Vince McMahon and the WWF. Heyman isn’t the one who ruined everything accomplished by Steve Austin. Sunday is about ending what Vince tried to accomplish. On Monday, he listened to Mick Foley talking about how the WWF sucked because Vince McMahon doesn’t have it anymore. His ideas and concepts are antiquated and the company is imploding from within.

Vince’s own children have turned on him and on Sunday, Vince’s company will die. His chances of success on Sunday are the same as his chances of running a football league. Cue Vince, with Heyman dropping to his knees for the mock bowing. Heyman asks where Pat Patterson and Gerald Brisco are and talks about how much he’s wanted to see someone destroy him. Vince is the most vile disgusting son of a b**** he’s ever seen.

He used Hulk Hogan’s blood to build Titan Towers and sold Bret Hart out to buy a plane with WWF painted on the side. Vince stole Shawn Michaels’ smile and made himself a billionaire. He’s a billionaire on Vince’s father’s hard work and then stole all of the competition’s ideas. Like Heyman’s, when Vince stole everything that ECW created. When Doink the Clown was running around with green hair, Steve Austin was drinking his first beer in ECW. While Bobby Heenan and Gene Okerlund were dancing, ECW was creating Attitude.

Heyman: “SCREW YOU! SCREW YOU AND YOUR FAMILY!” Vince flaunts his affairs in front of the world for her children to see. Look at Tazz, who was a machine and a wrestler, but since this is sports entertainment, Tazz is a fat commentator. Heyman’s hat comes off and Tazz gets up to choke Heyman out. Vince says that just like Heyman, the Alliance will choke. This was AWESOME with Heyman absolutely losing his mind out there as only he can. I’m not sure how much he believes what he was saying (you never can tell with Heyman) but dang he sold the heck out of the whole thing.

Jim Ross replaces Tazz on commentary.

Booker T. vs. Undertaker

Undertaker jumps him from behind on the ramp and the beating is on around ringside. Booker gets knocked over the announcers’ table before they head inside with Booker hammering away. Undertaker comes right back, says we’re sending a message tonight, grabs a chair, and shoves the referee down for the DQ in just over a minute.

Post match Undertaker hits Booker with the chair and nails the chokeslam.

Video of the WWF on Weakest Link. I liked that show.

Ivory is in William Regal (Alliance Commissioner) and makes a six way match for the vacant Women’s Title at Survivor Series. Ivory is happy and leaves when ace reporter Gregory Helms comes in to ask about the Immunity Battle Royal at Survivor Series, where the winner can’t be fired for a year. Helms knows just the man for the job, takes his glasses off, and flies away.

Steve Austin and Kurt Angle aren’t getting along about trust, so they pinkie swear their loyalty to each other.

Regal threatens Torrie Wilson about their upcoming mixed tag. When the Alliance ends the WWF on Sunday, he can find a position for her.

William Regal/Ivory vs. Torrie Wilson/Tajiri

Ivory chokes Torrie to start and faceplants her for two, followed by some hairmares. She stands on Torrie’s hair for a bonus but Torrie comes back with a clothesline for two. Torrie even throws in a Tajiri handspring elbow and it’s off to the men for a slugout. The Tarantula has Regal in trouble and Ivory takes the mist. Regal drapes Tajiri across the top rope and pulls Torrie in for the Regal Stretch and the DQ.

Rating: D. What is there to say here? Ivory was trying but there is only so much that you can do when Torrie is working most of the match. She was trying but you can’t do anything with her in the ring and that was obvious here. At least they kept it short here, but that’s about the extent of the positives.

Video on the ten man elimination tag, with Vince promising that someone is jumping from the Alliance. As usual in the big situations, they know how to do these really, really well.

Howard Finkel thanks Vince for the last twenty years just in case things go bad on Sunday. Vince insists that they will win on Sunday and don’t EVER touch him again.

Chris Jericho/The Rock vs. Steve Austin/Kurt Angle

Austin and Rock slug it out to start with Rock hitting a running neckbreaker and clothesline. Rock chops away but gets caught with the Thesz press. The middle rope elbow gets two and Angle tags himself in, only to have Rock pull him in. Jericho is in as well with a running forearm to Angle, followed by the middle rope dropkick for two. Angle gets in a knee to the ribs though and it’s back to Austin for the beating in the corner.

Jericho gets over to the corner for the top rope ax handle to the head and it’s back to Angle, who gets chopped backwards. There’s the triangle dropkick to Austin but Angle snaps off the German suplex. The right hands put Jericho down in the corner and Austin blasts him with a clothesline. The Thesz press is countered into a quickly broken Walls though, meaning Angle needs to jump Jericho from behind. Angle’s chinlock doesn’t last long as Jericho rolls out into the ankle lock.

That’s broken up in a hurry and Austin takes him to the top, only to get kicked down. The missile dropkick drops Austin and the enziguri into the Breakdown (Skull Crushing Finale) is enough for the hot tag to Rock. The spinebuster into the Sharpshooter has Austin in trouble but Angle makes the save with the ankle lock. Jericho breaks that up and takes Angle to the floor, where he suplexes Jericho in a heap. Angle goes back inside to beat on Rock as Austin grabs a chair. The referee calls for the DQ as the chair is wrapped around Rock’s ankle.

Rating: B. It was a big time main event match as Austin vs. Rock is always worth seeing. They beat each other up rather well out there and it makes sense for Austin and Angle to want to destroy Rock’s ankle before Sunday. The ending was the right way to go and hopefully we’re in for a huge match on Sunday to pay it all off.

Undertaker breaks up the Pillmanizing and it’s the rest of the teams coming in for the parade of finishers. Austin Stuns Rock to be the last man standing. Cue Vince to smile at Austin, who smiles back to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The Heyman promo and the main event are the only things worth seeing but the point here was making me want to see Sunday’s main event. It’s not like the rest of the show means a thing so going with what we got here was good enough. The entire point here was to focus on the main event though and they did that well enough.

Unfortunately there wasn’t much else on the show worth seeing and it was very obvious here. Couple that with people making the same criticisms of Vince that they would make 18 years later (after the company has become WAY more profitable) and there’s either some amusement or irony to go with the good main event.

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IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 25, 2005
Location: NEC Arena, Birmingham, England
Attendance: 10,500
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler

We’re over in England this week for the go home show for Backlash. I’m not sure what to expect this week, but you can probably bet on a slow form HHH promo where he talks about how incredible the Pedigree is. Other than that, we need to get ready for the pay per view, which isn’t the strongest card so far. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Coach is here after JR got beaten up last week.

Here’s Batista to open things up for a change. He’s here to honor a great man who gives his body to the business. That would be Jim Ross, who managed to do last week what it took Batista two years to do: beat HHH. Batista even puts on JR’s hat for a visual which works more than it should. Why didn’t JR tell us that he had wrestling skills? JR beat a ten time World Champion last week and that means a JR chant.

Cue HHH so Batista gives JR his hat back because things are getting serious. HHH talks about how serious this is, so Batista says he’ll defend the title against JR at Backlash instead. Since HHH can’t get a joke, Batista shows us the clip of JR getting the pin last week and raises his hand. HHH’s jacket comes off and the fight is almost on but HHH bails instead. The JR stuff was amusing and Batista needling HHH is always funny.

JR takes over for Coach on commentary.

We recap Viscera helping Trish last week and earning some, ahem, favors, in return.

Viscera and Trish Stratus are out to dinner together, though Viscera has to apologize for being late because he was buying condoms (and it’s about a ten pack). More on this later, thank goodness.

Chris Jericho vs. Sylvain Grenier

Grenier starts fast with a flapjack so Jericho chops away, only to get suplexed right back down for two. The chinlock goes on a minute in, because Grenier can’t go more than a minute without a chinlock. Jericho fights up with some forearms and the bulldog, followed by the enziguri. Conway gets in the distraction though, only to have Jericho slap on the Walls for the fast win. Just a step above a squash but at least they didn’t do anything ridiculous.

Post match the double teaming is on but Shelton Benjamin runs in for the save. Jericho isn’t exactly grateful so Shelton gives him a t-bone. Kind of a mixed message there no? Shelton: “WHO’S YOUR B**** NOW???”

Back at the restaurant, Trish thanks Viscera for what happened last week so orders bangers and mash in a Cockney accent. Viscera tells her that he is a banger who likes to mash, so Trish calls him the horniest guy on the planet. Viscera orders an entire page of the menu.

Christian and Tyson Tomko are in the back when Ric Flair comes in and tells Christian to take care of Batista tonight. Don’t worry though because Christian has this and he doesn’t need HHH’s help. The fans seem rather pleased by this one. A fight nearly breaks out but Tomko gets rid of Flair.

We look at Backlash tickets going on sale.

Here are Christian and Tomko for a chat. After saying Canadians are smarter than Brits, Christian talks about how he won’t have any problems doing what HHH can’t do: beating Batista with a real finisher. Then he’s heading to Smackdown to beating the Ali G ripoff John Cena, because that’s how he rolls. Cue Kane to beat up Tomko as Christian runs off.

Lita can’t wait for Trish to finally get what she deserves.

Christian is hiding from Kane and asks Flair for some help. HHH comes out but rather angrily tells Christian that they can talk business.

And now, the Masterlock Challenge, because it worked so well last week. The money is offered (pounds instead of dollars), the plant is pulled from the audience, and Masters wins. This takes several minutes.

In the back, Coach asks how long it is going to take Shawn Michaels and Hulk Hogan to self destruct. Shawn doesn’t buy it because they have big egos after they’ve done it all. Coach is tossed out and Shawn introduces Hogan, who introduces Gene Okerlund for the formal interview. Shawn talks about looking around the locker room last week and needing someone to fight with him. That’s why he asked about Hogan two weeks ago right?

Hogan talks about the Hall of Fame and the fans wanting one more match. After hanging out with Big Ben and eating some tea and crumpets, he had to give the fans what they wanted and deal with Muhammad and Daivari. So what are you gonna do? Shawn not being able to tear the shirt is funny at least. Just a quick hype interview for the big tag match.

Here are a bunch of Divas with Christy Hemme saying they’re here to party. They call out the ladies of the Daily Star, with Lawler rather approving of their status as Page Three girls. I can get that as they’re rather fetching, but would anyone like to have a match anytime soon? We’re over an hour into the show and we’ve had one match which didn’t even last three minutes.

They’re all here to promote William Regal’s new book (which is incredible) so here he is in person, with Tajiri as a bonus. Regal is at his hammy best here, soaking in the home country cheers and encouraging them a bit. Dancing ensues but here are Hassan and Daivari to cut them off. As Regal’s eyes bug out, Hassan accuses England of being a follower of all things America. Challenge, accepted.

Muhammad Hassan/Khosrow Daivari vs. William Regal/Tajiri

Non-title. Joined in progress with Regal beating up both of them so the villains take a quick breather on the floor. Tajiri comes in for a standing moonsault onto Daivari but it’s quickly off to Hassan to take over on Regal. The slow beatdown ensues as we see a pro Waylon Mercy sign in the crowd. Daivari gets two off a neckbreaker but it’s a collision with Hassan for a double knockdown. Regal kicks Daivari away and the hot tag brings in Tajiri for the rapid fire kicks. The Downward Spiral plants Tajiri though and Hassan knocks Regal down on the floor. Daivari’s guillotine legdrop finishes Tajiri.

Rating: D. And that pretty much ends anything Regal and Tajiri could do with the titles. The best thing that can be said here is that Regal, the hometown boy who has a book coming out and is a champion, didn’t take the fall in this non-title match which could have had any other team putting Hassan and Daivari over. I know the tag division doesn’t mean anything, but I’d love to hear how this was the best solution they had.

Post match the beatdown stays on with no Hogan to make the save, because that interview earlier was backstage in another country.

Back at the restaurant, Trish asks Viscera what his name means. It means inner organs, but his outer organ works just fine. Trish is scared off so she offers to knock Christy Hemme out so Viscera can do whatever to her. As we move past that as fast as possible, Viscera asks her to dance and destroys a tray of dishes by mistake. Viscera: “Uh, check please?”

Edge vs. Val Venis

Edge jumps him before the bell and kicks Venis in the face as we get one of those awesome British chants that I can’t understand. We’re already on the chinlock as the fans switch to a HARDY chant. Val fights up with a hot shot and clothesline as the fans just go away for the comeback. A half nelson slam looks to set up the Money Shot but Edge gets the knees up. The spear finishes Venis.

Rating: D. Just a quick match here and it wasn’t very good. It’s almost strange to see Edge win a regular match like this as Venis could have been anyone here. This doesn’t really do much to set up Edge vs. Benoit on Sunday but it was nice to throw a little curve in there for a change.

Post match Edge puts on a leglock and ignores the chants for Matt. Edge switches to a Crossface for some salt rubbing until Benoit comes in for the save and brawl.

HHH, Christian and Flair come in to see Coach, who is now guest referee. Flair will be guest timekeeper and HHH is going to be Christian’s problem solver as the old trope is brought up again. HHH won’t let Coach call Eric Bischoff to confirm everything.

Viscera and Trish have drinks, with Viscera having some mouthwash (which he swallows). Hang on though as Trish slaps him, saying he gets nothing if he doesn’t destroy Kane first. That’s cool with Viscera, but he wants a little down payment. Trish flashes him and his eyes bug out.

The Diva Search is coming because we’re that lucky.

Christian vs. Batista

Non-title with Coach as referee, Flair as timekeeper and HHH at ringside. Batista isn’t wasting time this week and starts throwing Christian around with ease, including a trip out to the floor. Back in and Batista sends him into the corner for some kicks to the ribs, followed by a heck of a whip into the corner. Batista hits a powerslam but hang on as Coach has to tie his shoe. HHH gets in a low blow and a thumb to the eye as we take a break.

Back with Christian choking on the ropes and getting two off a splash. The chinlock doesn’t last long as JR rips into Coach for general purposes. Christian’s springboard dropkick gets two more but Batista fights up, only to get choked by Flair. Christian sends him throat first into the rope and a neckbreaker gets two.

The comeback is on in a hurry with clotheslines and the powerslam but a Flair distraction cuts him off. Christian gets caught in an electric chair but Coach hurts his shoulder. Batista beats everyone up and tosses HHH, setting up the Batista Bomb on Christian. Coach is out so Batista grabs the hand to slap the mat for three, which counts here.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t quite Austin vs. Love but it did the job well enough. Christian isn’t quite ready to break through the glass ceiling but they would be a little nuts to not send him to Smackdown to go after Cena’s title. The seeds have been planted and it wasn’t going too far to see him in this match.

Post match Batista beats up HHH and Flair but walks into a Pedigree. HHH posts and shouts a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This was a rather different kind of show and it didn’t work out that well. The wrestling was barely there for the first half and then it became clear that Sunday is just a two match show. The tag match is going to be more about nostalgia and a one time moment while the main event is a rematch from a not great original match. That doesn’t sound like the best show, which is probably why it’s such a forgotten event. Pretty bad show here, but it could have been a lot worse.

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IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 7, 2005
Location: Super Arena, Saitama, Japan
Attendance: 16,657
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is a first for the company as they are now heading over to Japan for a rare international Raw. It’s a stacked card too with the Tag Team Titles on the line, Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho in a submission match and Edge FINALLY getting his World Title shot against HHH. Given the way things are going, we might actually get some lengthy matches out of all three. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence, still featuring the Rock. How long has it been since he’s been in anything more than a cameo?

Here’s Eric Bischoff to get things going. Bischoff says he is the GM of Raw and one of the most powerful and respected men in wrestling. The translator explains it to the Japanese crowd, who are NOT happy with Bischoff. In addition to the previously announced matches, we’re getting Shawn Michaels vs. Ric Flair. We’ll get things going right now.

Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho

Submission match. Jericho goes nose to nose with him to start and it’s an aggressive lockup to start. They go outside without breaking the lockup and it’s more nose to nose. Back in and Benoit starts in on a hammerlock but has to break up a Walls attempt. Neither of them can get anywhere on the mat and that means another standoff. Jericho drops him ribs first over the top rope but the springboard dropkick is knocked out of the air.

An exchange of headbutts puts them both on the floor though and we take a break. Back with Benoit snapping off a suplex as Jericho is busted open. Jericho breaks up the rolling German suplexes and grabs an octopus hold of all things. That’s reversed as well though and now the rolling German suplexes connect. The third is countered into a half crab though as Jericho is opening up the submission playbook here.

Rating: B. Oh like this wasn’t going to be awesome with the two of them in a hard hitting match in Japan. There’s something awesome about watching Benoit try for submissions (I could watch him snap people down into the Crossface for hours) as he has more intensity with them than anyone else. Jericho can hang with him in there for a bit but Benoit winning makes more sense here.

Post match they shake hands and Benoit gets to pose in the ring on his own for a bit.

Video on the trip to Japan and their time there so far.

Ric Flair had a great time in Roppongi last night and can’t wait for a great evening for Evolution. HHH has been thinking about Batista and maybe they should fight at Wrestlemania. Flair isn’t sure and likes the idea of HHH and Batista ruling the two shows (Flair: “And I’m part of the show too!”). HHH agrees and is going to talk to Batista.

Christian is talking to a Japanese reporter but stops to ask Stacy Keibler for a quote for the article. The interviewer is looking for Randy Orton, which gets a big reaction. Apparently Christian is very annoying. Christian mocks Orton’s posing and thinks he’s a chair shot away from ending his career. Stacy thinks Orton could beat Christian so Christian wants a match tonight. With Tomko that is.

Wrestlemania Braveheart trailer.

Maven wants to know why he wasn’t in the Royal Rumble. Since he wasn’t, he’ll win here instead.

Batista vs. Maven

Guess what happens. Thirty seconds.

Post match we get another video from Smackdown, with Big Show being ready to beat Batista at Wrestlemania after he wins the title at No Way Out. Batista isn’t pleased. I’m not sure why Batista looks so stunned when this interview aired on Smackdown last week. It’s not like it’s a hidden camera.

Post break Batista rants at Bischoff about the Smackdown footage so Bischoff promises to get to the bottom of it. First though, Bischoff needs to talk to him about Theodore Long’s Smackdown offer. Smackdown is second rate and Raw is in the palm of his hand. Batista seems interested by both ideas.

Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. William Regal/Tajiri

Regal and Tajiri are challenging and the fans are WAY behind Tajiri, in case that wasn’t clear. Regal takes Conway down by the arm to start and it’s off to Tajiri for a baseball slide to the face. It’s back to Regal, who gets taken down by a quick suplex. A backdrop gets Regal out of a front facelock and it’s back to Tajiri for the hard kicks. An enziguri drops Grenier for two and the fans aren’t pleased. That means a double handspring elbow to take the champs down so Grenier grabs the flag. Tajiri kicks it away though and fires off some mist, setting up the Buzzsaw kick for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D+. The match itself wasn’t the point here as this was ALL about the home country pop for Tajiri and there’s nothing wrong with that. Regal and Tajiri have a history together so it’s not like this was even that far out of left field. It’s not like La Resistance has any value at the moment anyway. Not a good match (though it was far from terrible) but they did exactly what they were trying to do.

Post match Tajiri says something in Japanese and the new champs celebrate in the crowd.

Sumo champion Akebono is in the crowd.

Here are some of this year’s Hall of Fame inductees.

Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels

You know Flair is getting the legend reaction here. Shawn’s is a bit louder but the fans are clapping instead of bowing. The fans respect them both but in different ways. Flair takes him into the corner and sneaks in an elbow as a villain should. The chops and right hands in the corner wake Shawn up enough to reverse for some chops of his own. A backdrop keeps Flair in trouble so he pokes the eye to take over. Shawn is right back with some right hands to set up the Flair Flop for two.

Flair gets smart and hits the chop block to take over, meaning it’s time for the standard leg work. The Figure Four goes on but is finally turned over, meaning Flair can kick at the leg some more. Shawn is fine enough to get two off a backslide as Lawler counts to two in Japanese. An enziguri drops Shawn and the fans are very appreciative of a tribute to Inoki. Flair kicks at the knee again and goes up, with the crowd instantly knowing what’s coming. The forearm into the nipup sets up the top rope elbow so Sweet Chin Music can finish clean.

Rating: C+. This took some time to get going but they finished as they should have. Both of them are legends in Japan so the fans were going to cheer anything they did out there. It was fine to play it safe with a basic match not try to do anything too big, as Shawn is gearing up for Kurt Angle and Flair is going to be there for HHH and Batista.

Here’s Jerry Lawler in the ring for an American fashion show. Maria is out first to represent the wild, wild west (she’s wearing a cowboy hat and shooting finger guns), Victoria represents the open road as a biker (jacket over her usual gear), and Christy represents the beaches in a swimsuit. Lawler tries to go over some rules for the thing but it’s Simon Dean interrupting instead.

Simon calls this a waste of time and insults the crowd, drawing Akebono out of his chair. That goes nowhere as Simon calls the women overweight. Lawler stands up for them so Simon calls him Burger King. Christy gets in a low blow and Simon is done. Pretty close to a waste of time.

Evolution has a meeting in the back with HHH trying to talk Batista into going to Smackdown (Didn’t he want him on Raw about forty minutes ago?). Flair paints the picture and Batista will think about it as they stop Edge from winning the title tonight.

Edge isn’t happy with everyone talking about Batista when he finally has his title shot tonight. HHH has his Braveheart trailer for Wrestlemania where he talks about defending the title because Edge gets overlooked again.

Video on the trip to Japan.

Randy Orton vs. Tyson Tomko

Orton seems more popular here than in America. No Christian with Tomko in a bit of a surprise. A headlock takeover has Tomko down early on as Lawler blames Stacy for getting Orton into this. Back up and Tomko hits a powerslam as Christian drags Stacy out here. The distraction lets Tomko hit a big clothesline and it’s time to wonder about another concussion.

Tomko starts going after the head in slow motion but the backbreaker gets Orton out of trouble. Orton slugs away and hits a dropkick but bangs his head again. Back up and Tomko whips him into the corner, which is reversed into a rollup for a pretty fast pin. Oh and Stacy cheers to validate her existence.

Rating: D. I could go for Christian vs. Orton and this was an acceptable step to get there. That being said, it didn’t do much for Tomko, who is only there for the sake of being big and imposing while attacking some people between matches. It’s better to not have him in a match of his own as things don’t tend to go all that well.

Post match Christian and Tomko jump Orton with Christian hitting an Unprettier. Orton had to be helped out during the break. It’s so strange seeing concussions being used as a storyline these days.

We look back at Regal and Tajiri winning the Tag Team Titles.

Raw World Title: Edge vs. HHH

HHH is defending and has Flair with him. They trade hammerlocks to start and now the fans are rather quiet, likely because they know how important a World Title match is. HHH bridges up into a backslide, albeit after a bit of a slip, for two but Edge grabs a headscissors on the mat. Back up and Edge hits a spear in the corner but a second attempt hits post, as tends to be the case.

We take a break and come back with Edge getting two off a backbreaker. A DDT on the arm gets HHH out of trouble and they’re both down. The facebuster gives HHH two and the spinebuster is good for the same. Edge backdrops his way out of the Pedigree but the spear is cut off by the running knee. A shot to the back takes HHH down though and a pretty weak Edgecator goes on. That stays on for a rather long time until HHH dives over for the rope.

Edge’s spear hits the referee as we get more into Evolution’s wheelhouse. There’s no count off a neckbreaker so Edge has to spear Flair down, knocking a chair out of his hands. HHH gets in a belly to back suplex to make Edge drop the chair and everyone is down again. They both crawl for the chair but here’s Batista to take it away. HHH knocks Edge off the apron, sending him into Batista by mistake. Back in and Edge hits the Impaler for yet another double knockdown. Batista comes in and spinebusters Edge, setting up the Pedigree to retain the title.

Rating: C. They would have been better off with about two minutes of laying around cut out of this but Edge can continue to rant about not getting a fair shot so he’ll be fine. What matters most here is HHH needs Batista again, furthering Batista’s big moment which has to be coming in the next few weeks. Not a bad match, but it was more about the stories than anything else.

HHH holds up the title but Batista looks at both him and the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This felt like a pay per view edition of Raw and it’s always nice to see something like that. They had some big matches with a cool moment in the title change, plus a pretty awesome opener. Once we get No Way Out finished up, it’s time to get things going to Wrestlemania. What matters here though is how much groundwork has been laid, because as soon as Batista gets his moment, everything is going to change for good.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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IMG Credit: House Of Glory

Culture Clash 19
Date: April 6, 2019
Location: NYC Arena, Jamaica, New York
Commentators: Matthew Ryan Shapiro, JD, Ben Venuto

This is Amazing Red’s House of Glory promotion and as usual, I have no idea what to expect from this show as I’ve never seen the promotion before, but that’s the point of the weekend. The card looked good though and that’s enough to get me to check out the show. Hopefully it’s as solid as it looks, but you never can tell. Let’s get to it.

The announcers welcome us to the show. For some reason, almost no commentators have been shown all week.

Smiley vs. Leroy Green

Casket match (Who starts with a casket match?), with Green seemingly wanting to save Smiley from some evil stable. Green starts fast with a reverse hurricanrana and a regular hurricanrana and it’s already time for the casket. The fans chant for Smiley, which one commentator says is the fans being behind Green. Back in and Smiley takes over as the announcers explain a bit more of the backstory with Green going after the House of Gangone stable, of which Smiley seems to be a member.

Smiley whips him into the casket and pulls out a kendo stick for a beating. Green hits a quick superkick and takes the stick away to beat on Smiley instead. A modified Backstabber sends Smiley outside, where he finds a chair to throw at Green’s head. Smiley puts the chair on Green’s face and beats on it with the stick, eventually breaking it in half. Green is right back up and ties him in the ropes, where Smiley spits in his face. A pull of the ropes sends Smiley into the chair but he’s fine enough to hit a brainbuster onto the turnbuckle.

It’s time to set up a door between the ring and the barricade but Green backdrops his way out of trouble. Smiley is fine enough to hit a pair of buckle bombs and a running powerbomb onto the ramp. Green gets back up again and spears him through the doors for the big knockdown. Back in and Green rips off the mask before pulling out Smiley’s old mask (a smiley face mask), which Smiley puts on. Before we can find out the impact, Green knocks him into the casket for the win at 15:16.

Rating: C-. The action was good but they threw you into what seemed like a big story pretty fast. Commentary explained as much of it as they could though and I wasn’t lost so it could have been worse. Smiley wasn’t very good and while Green was better, neither of them exactly came off as anything special.

House of Glory Title: Anthony Gangone vs. Robby Eagles

Gangone, with his left hand in a cast, is defending and seems to be the top heel in the promotion. He has three belts (the House of Glory Title and both CZW Tag Team Titles since his partner Amazing Red suddenly retired) and a bunch of people with him, including two guys to rap his theme song. Gangone’s minions distract Eagles to start and a thumb to the eye has him in early trouble.

The threat of a right hand makes Eagles duck and Gangone gets two off a DDT. Dreams By The Waterfall (something out of a torture rack) is broken up and Eagles knocks him into the corner for his first offense. What appeared to be Sliced Bread is broken up so Eagles goes with a middle rope Downward Spiral instead. A 450 misses but Eagles slips out of a package piledriver and nails an enziguri. Gangone kicks him in the face again and hits a package facebuster for a rather near fall.

Eagles’ low superkick again looks to set up the 450 but Gangone rolls to the ropes. That’s fine with Eagles as he jumps down and puts on a cross between an Indian deathlock and a Figure four. The goons distract the referee though and the tap isn’t seen but the goons do get ejected. As the goons argue, a mystery woman (the announcers don’t know her name) comes in and kicks Eagles low, setting up Dreams By The Waterfall (torture rack flipped forward into a knee to the face) to retain the title at 9:54.

Rating: C+. Pretty nice match here with Gangone as a good cult style leader. You need a bunch of minions to make something like that work and Gangone had it covered with at least five people helping him out. I wasn’t wild on his in-ring work but he was getting the character stuff down and that’s what matters more.

Post match the goons surround Gangone as he sits in the middle of the ring and talks about all of his injuries. The fans still boo him no matter what he does and now Amazing Red has retired due to a serious injury. WWE even put out a video with wrestlers like Ricochet and Sasha Banks thanking him for everything he’s done. Gangone says he’s going to break character (erg) because Red retiring just showed that he was weak of body and mind. Without Gangone, this place wouldn’t exist and even his house needs to learn that. Gangone yells at his goons, saying none of them matter without him.

That was quite a bit and straight out of the Sting vs. NWO years, complete with a Scorpion Death Drop. It didn’t make a ton of sense but I’m assuming that the story will be addressed on whatever regular shows this promotion does. It’s a lot to throw at you at once and for what is supposed to be a showcase show, I’m not sure it’s the best idea to have commentary saying they don’t get it either.

Juba vs. Ryan Burgandy vs. Evander James vs. Big Daddy Cruise vs. Kai vs. Matt Travis

The winner is the #1 contender to the Crown Jewel (midcard) Title. Burgandy might be five feet tall but his shirt says that he’s really big (and his theme music is a cover of Larger Than Life). Cruise is a big ladies man, because that’s the most original gimmick in the world. Juba, the biggest man in the match, starts slamming people and shoves away everyone trying to get on him at once.

Cruise hits a sitout powerbomb for two on James and Travis hits a heck of a German suplex for two on Cruise with Kai making the save. Travis and Kai go at it for a bit with Kai getting two off a brainbuster. Juba comes back in and starts throwing smaller humans around until Cruise comes in for some better luck. Evander teases a dive but instead just goes to the floor for a right hand to Juba. Travis and Burgandy hit shooting stars off the top to take out everyone else, leaving us with the two of them going inside.

That doesn’t last long as James comes back in with a Meteora to Burgandy in the corner. Kai comes in with a superkick for two but Cruise makes a save. Cruise’s Michinoku Driver gets two with Juba making the save this time. Burgandy manages to German suplex Juba for two and tries a shooting star to a standing Juba….who doesn’t seem to see him coming and they collide. Juba’s spinning fall away slam plants Burgandy but Travis comes in and steals the pin at 8:53.

Rating: C-. Like so many shows this weekend, this was a bunch of people in the ring at once and everyone trying to get in whatever they can in the limited time they have. It’s not a bad match but it could have been better with some more time for the people to shine. Or just less people involved.

Post match a bunch of people from CZW invade and beat down the people from the match. CZW owner DJ Hyde says he’s coming for his Tag Team Titles and if you want a real show, come see their stuff. He’s coming for Gangone and Red as well. Oh and screw the fans. The locker room comes out to chase them off. Ken Broadway, apparently a rather soft spoken guy, swears a lot and says come back and fight. While he has a mic, Broadway asks if he can take Red’s place against Fenix in the main event. That’s an affirmative.

Low Ki/LAX vs. Great Muta/Pentagon Jr./Tajiri

Diamante is here with LAX. Since the curtain doesn’t quite fit in the entrance, you can see LAX walking around before their entrance. Pentagon and Ortiz start things off and the dueling chants are on in a hurry. Pentagon shows him CERO MIEDO and gets sent into the corner for a running elbow. That just means a Sling Blade and the Karate Kid pose, sending Ortiz bailing into the corner.

It’s off to Tajiri vs. Santana for a feeling out process with Santana taking him to the mat. The big kick sends Santana outside and it’s time for Muta vs. Low Ki. Muta takes him down so Low Ki has the legs up to hold him off as the slow pace continues. Muta’s full nelson into a Fujiwara armbar has Low Ki down again and a Kimura sends Low Ki to the rope. The power drive elbow connects and it’s back to Tajiri, who grabs Low Ki by the tie. Well you knew that was coming.

A slap to the back of the bald head ticks Low Ki off enough that he drags Tajiri into the corner as the heat segment begins. It’s a quick heat though as Tajiri kicks at the leg and brings Pentagon back in. Low Ki kicks him down and goes after the mask with Tajiri making the save. LAX goes into their sequence of suplexes and splashes for two, which somehow fires Pentagon up enough for the hot tag to Muta.

A Shining Wizard sends Santana into the corner but Low Ki drops Muta with a springboard kick to the head. Everything breaks down and Low Ki gets triple teamed for a bit and double red mist takes out LAX. Low Ki goes up for the stomp but dives into the green mist, setting up the Shining Wizard for the pin at 16:44.

Rating: C. Oh come on like the quality of the match matters at all here. This was all about Muta and that’s all it needed to be. It’s a great moment as you don’t get to see a legend like that every day. This was a completely acceptable match and the mist at the end made it all the cooler. The rest of the match was fine too, but just seeing Muta was a great treat.

Post match LAX demands their music be played, which goes on for some time.

Crown Jewel Title: Mantequilla vs. Kikutaro

Kikutaro is challenging. Mantequilla (Spanish for butter) has a cape and is called the Lucha Hero. The early exchange of wristlocks (in slow motions) goes to Mantequilla in the form of some armdrags and Kikutaro wants a timeout on the floor. Back in and Kikutaro gets his own armdrags but the third is blocked to give Mantequilla two.

Kikutaro goes with the comedy in the form of a kick and two fingers to the back of the tights. Back in and they trade superhero poses before three armdrags have Kikutaro in trouble. Kikutaro charges into some raised boots in the corner so he throws the referee into the corner for a Stinger Splash on Mantequilla. Another charge into the boot knocks Kikutaro cold so Mantequilla rolls him over, but Kikutaro keeps rolling to stay on his stomach.

Mantequilla finally gets him up into the corner and whips the referee at him for a missed splash. Kikutaro gets two off a sitout AA but he misses a moonsault. The champ misses a Swanton so they trade low blows and rather soft chops. Double eye pokes are both blocked, as are more low blows. A hug is offered and Kikutaro hugs the referee to show his sincerity. Of course he chops Mantequilla, earning himself a crucifix bomb for two. A spinning palm strike retains the title at 16:17.

Rating: D. The World Title match gets less than ten minutes and this breaks sixteen? I’ll give them this much: it actually didn’t feel that long. I don’t think anyone was believing that the title was changing hands here and I could see Mantequilla having a better match against a serious opponent. It wasn’t the worst, but much longer than a comedy match should be going.

Boss Rob Blatt brings out new Women’s Champion Bobbi Tyler for a chat. Rob leaves and Bobbi introduces herself to the crowd, saying she can’t wait to get out of this horrible country. If any of the women in the back want a title shot, they can come to London and get one because she’s never coming back to this disgusting city again. This brings out former champion Sonya Strong, who grabs the title and says Bobbi better understand that no one else is taking the title. A belt shot knocks Bobbi out.

Sonya Strong/Violette vs. Kris Stadtlander/Nikki Adams

Sonya and Violette don’t have the best history together and Kris is an alien. Sonya headscissors Kris down to start and it’s already off to the partners. Violette slaps Nikki in the face and gets pulled down into a choke. Commentary compares Nikki to the crazy people you see muttering to themselves in the frozen food section. That’s certainly some unique character analysis. Sonya stomps away in the corner and blocks a powerbomb out of said corner before handing it back to Violette for some shoulders to the ribs.

We hit the chinlock for a few moments until Adams fights up and gets over for the tag in a hurry. A Blue Thunder Bomb gets two on Sonya and something like Eat Defeat (knee instead of foot) is good for the same. Adams hits a cutter on Violette as everything breaks down. Sonya German suplexes Kris to send her outside but kicks Violette by mistake, leaving Sonya vs. Adams. With Adams tied in the Tree of Woe, here’s Bobbi to distract Sonya again. It’s enough for Kris to kick Sonya in the back of the head, allowing Adams to steal the pin at 8:45.

Rating: D+. This was fairly messy, though it’s a lot better than some matches you’ll see on a show like this. The women were far more polished than others and Kris stood out, even with the rather bizarre ALIEN gimmick. I know this isn’t the most down to earth (no pun intended) promotion in the world, but an alien? Really? It’s certainly unique but it doesn’t exactly fit.

Ken Broadway vs. Rey Fenix

After the wrong music plays, we’re ready to do. Broadway gets rapped to the ring live and makes it rain in the ring. Fenix shakes his hand but doesn’t seem all that impressed so he starts firing off the kicks. A headscissors is countered but Fenix sends him outside for an early breather. Back in and Broadway slams him down for another trip to the floor, this time capped off by a suicide dive.

A missile dropkick gives Ken two (somewhat impressive as Broadway has some size) and a suplex is good for the same. Fenix misses a charge in the corner but spins to the apron, setting up a springboard missile dropkick for two. Broadway gets knocked outside and it’s a suicide dive to send him into the barricade for the big crash. Back in and Fenix hits his several springboards wristdrag but Broadway is right back with a gutbuster.

The Backstabber gets two more but Fenix ties him in the ropes and goes up. In your HE SHOULDN’T BE ABLE TO DO THAT move, Fenix walks the ropes and kicks Broadway in the face, setting up a running Canadian Destroyer. Broadway is on his feet before Fenix though and hits the Currency (Penalty) Kick for the very fast pin at 8:21.

Rating: C+. Well ok then. The ending was as sudden as anything I can remember in a long time as Fenix was making his big comeback and then a single kick to the chest puts him away. That’s not exactly the kind of finisher you would expect from someone called the Self Made Savage or someone of his size. Either way, it’s quite a win for Broadway and Fenix got to be his usually impressive self.

Post match they shake hands and Broadway thanks Fenix for the match. Fenix says Broadway won with honor and thanks the fans. This has been a crazy weekend for Fenix but the fans are a great reason to come here and fight like he did tonight. He’ll be back and he wants a rematch, which gets a handshake from Broadway. After Fenix leaves, Broadway calls out Gangone because the World Title is his.

Private Party vs. Juicy Product

That would be Isaiah Kassidy/Marq Quen vs. JT Dunn/David Starr because DAVID STARR MUST APPEAR ON EVERY WRESTLEMANIA WEEKEND SHOW EVER (not a bad thing as I like the guy)! Private Party has a very energetic entrance and the fans seem to like them. Before the match, Private Party has everyone involved say YEAH very loudly. Starr works on Quen’s arm to a standoff to start. Quen gets taken down by the leg into a rollup for two and gets his lip busted open somewhere in there. Fans: “SAY YOU’RE SORRY!”

Instead, Quen dropkicks Starr in the face and back for one and it’s off to Dunn for some double teaming. A double elbow drops an invading Kassidy and it’s time for the Party to take a breather on the floor. The breather seems to work as they come back in with a camel clutch/stomp combination to Starr, sending Starr and Dunn to the floor. That means a big flip dive to the floor….and Never Gonna Give You Up (the Rick Roll song) starts playing. As everyone dances, Starr and Dunn jump the Party to take over.

The song starts again so Dunn can dance while Starr keeps stomping. Actually make that both Starr and Dunn dancing together, complete with a kiss. And now, with that out of the way, we get back to a normal tag match with Quen being worked over in the corner (Yes, we’re just supposed to go back to a normal match. Why does this surprise you?).

A double dropkick gets two but it’s Quen fighting back with forearms and a double dropkick of his own. The hot tag brings in Kassidy and everything breaks down. A heck of a Swanton gets two on Starr but Dunn comes back in with a top rope double stomp to Kassidy’s back. Kassidy gets powerbombed onto Dunn’s knees but Quen is back up with a bunch of kicks to the head.

Starr blasts Kassidy with a clothesline but a shooting star onto his back puts everyone down. The Party is up first with a pop up Codebreaker on Dunn and another shooting star to the back gets two as Starr makes a save. Starr gets in a knee to Quen’s face to set up an RKO from Dunn for two as frustration sets in. The Party gets back up and Dunn is sat on top for a hurricanrana into a cutter to give Quen the pin at 18:00.

Rating: B. Completely and utterly WHAT THE CENSORED moment in the middle aside, I liked this match more than anything else on the show. Starr continues to live up to his name and Dunn was quite the performer as well. Private Party is a fun team and I could see them going somewhere with some more seasoning. The announcers mentioned that they had wrestled a host of top level teams so there’s clearly something there.

Overall Rating: C. This show was a hard one to rate as you have some good action and VERY deep stories, but that second part is the problem: for newcomers, you’re going to be very lost if you don’t pay very close attention, and even then there’s a lot you’re going to miss. The House of Gangone seems to be connected to everything on the show and there’s a lot of moving parts.

The show itself was a nice mixture of stuff, though they could have trimmed some of the time down by not having so many angles and lost post match sequences. It didn’t feel like a show designed to draw in new viewers, which is kind of a weird choice for a show on this big of a stage. I liked it well enough, but I could use a history lesson to know how all of this ties together.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 3, 2004
Location: America West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s a big night here with Chris Benoit defending the World Title against Shawn Michaels. HHH is still lurking around though because he doesn’t know how to do anything else. Other than that we have the continuing adventures of Eugene, who has turned out to be quite the charming fellow, especially with William Regal as his handler. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video looks at Benoit vs. Michaels, billed as the Showdown in the Desert. I’ve heard of worse ideas.

Opening sequence.

JR welcomes us to Memphis.

Evolution vs. Tajiri/Shelton Benjamin/Edge

Flair is the odd man out here. HHH and Shelton start things off but Randy tags himself in before anything can start. Orton catches a kick to the ribs but is smart enough to not spin the leg around for the Dragon Whip. A clothesline drops Orton and it’s Tajiri coming in, only to be taken into the Evolution corner. As he comes in, the fans remind HHH that he tapped out. Edge, now with a more stylish black cast, gets in as well and it’s a rather nice looking staredown.

HHH eventually gets the better of it and brings Orton in for some choking in the corner. Evolution keeps taking turns on Edge with Batista slamming him down and HHH stomping away in the corner. The bad hand goes into the steps and HHH slugs away, followed by the facebuster for two. Edge scores with a spinwheel kick and it’s off to Tajiri for some slightly better kicks. A tornado DDT gets two on HHH until Batista breaks up the handspring with a shot to the back.

We come back from a break with Tajiri still in trouble, including HHH elbowing him to the floor. Batista chokes a bit and HHH adds an elbow to the chest as the dominance continues. Lawler: “Is it true that if you turn an Oriental upside down, they become disoriented?” Orton even gets in some pounding of his own and grabs a long chinlock. Back up and Tajiri kicks the head out of Orton, allowing the hot tag off to Edge. Everything breaks down and Edge hits Orton with a top rope clothesline. Batista breaks up the spear attempt and HHH clotheslines Benjamin. Tajiri mists Batista though and the spear is enough to put Orton away.

Rating: B-. Good old fashioned six man tag (which we need a lot more of) here and that’s exactly what this story needed. Evolution vs. a rotating cast of faces is a perfect way to book the show as you can do all kinds of combinations. The win should give Edge the inside track to an Intercontinental Title shot and there’s nothing wrong with that. Good booking and fun action to start the show.

Jonathan Coachman and Garrison Cade are insulting the women of Phoenix (and promising two good looking midwest women, who better not be Moolah and Mae Young) when Vince McMahon comes in to say he’s here for the big main event. That’s a nice cameo and Vince put Benoit over very strong.

Smackdown ReBound.

Last night at a Smackdown show, Eddie Guerrero brought his family into the ring when “something” happened, possibly involving JBL. I don’t see this going well.

HHH rants to Bischoff about being in the World Title match. Batista wants Tajiri and Johnny Nitro tries to calm things down. HHH: “Take it easy Johnny Oversell.” For next week: Batista vs. Tajiri, Orton vs. Edge for the Intercontinental Title and HHH vs. Benjamin.

Hurricane vs. Rob Conway

They fight over a neckbreaker to start with Conway getting the better of it and hammering away. It’s off to a modified cravate to keep Hurricane in trouble but he pops up for a missed Shining Wizard. Conway is right back up with a hanging swinging neckbreaker for the clean pin.

Rating: D. Not enough time to mean anything here but at least they’re doing something to set up next week’s match. That’s been the norm as of late and that makes for some fun television: set up things for next week and keep giving the fans a reason to come back. Why is that so hard to grasp?

Post match Conway promises a special beating for Eugene.

Video on Kane’s renewed evil, including forcing a kiss on Lita last week. You know, in case you haven’t seen enough from Kane in recent months.

Kane vs. Steven Richards

Chokeslam in about thirty seconds.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel. Before the guest comes out, Jericho talks about tonight’s World Title match. What are his thoughts? It’s been far too long since he’s had a World Title match of his own so he wants the first shot at the winner (making sure to point out that it’s someone other than HHH challenging for a change in a nice touch).

As for the show though, his guest is Matt Hardy, who believes in karma and is not afraid of pain. Jericho asks him about Kane and Lita but Matt gets right to the point: he wants Lita in the ring right now because he needs to ask her something. Lita shows up on the screen and says Matt has to listen to her. In what sounds like a forced statement, she says she never loved him and has found someone else. She never wants to see him again and needs him to stay away from her.

Lita finally snaps and says she can’t do this before screaming that she’s in the basement, revealing that Kane has her hostage. Matt runs out and Jericho says that’s kind of an abrupt end to the show. Cue Christian, Trish Stratus (all in black and…..well dang) and Tyson Tomko to chat a bit before coming in and laying Jericho out, including a low blow from Trish.

During the break, Matt went to save Lita but Kane was gone. Hugging ensues. Again: logical stuff there. There was no reason for Matt to wait until the break was over if it was that important, so just say it happened in real time and show it later.

Gail Kim vs. Victoria

Non-title and Molly, now with long, curly blonde hair, is with Gail. Before the match, Gail says no one feels sorry for Lita. Gail jumps her to start but gets half gorilla pressed up with Victoria dropping her part of the way through. The dancing moonsault gets two with Molly making the save and earning herself a stern lecture.

Back up and Gail clotheslines her into a chinlock, followed by a dragon sleeper. That works so well that Gail does the same sequence of moves again, this time causing Victoria to fight up and scream a bit. Three straight shot to the face have Gail knocked down (ignore Gail falling before the contact on at least one of them) but she’s right back with the Black Widow….and actually gets the tap.

Rating: D. Pretty boring match here but Victoria does need a new challenger. I can’t say fresh because we’ve seen every combination of these women for the better part of ever but at least we’re getting somewhere different with these people. Gail isn’t exactly polished at this point and hopefully we get to Trish instead of her instead.

William Regal is ready to train Eugene in what he calls a torture session. This might be his way to get out of this once and for all.

Vince is alone in a sky box to watch the main event.

It’s time for the training session with Eugene, who is very excited by an armdrag because Ricky Steamboat did them. Regal does a bunch of moves but Eugene does them all (set to what would become his music) and then taunts him with toys and a HHH water bottle. Regal switches to chain wrestling (as Ride of Valkyries starts up)….and is almost immediately taken down into a Regal Stretch with Eugene making him tap.

That’s EXACTLY how this character should work as he’s a goon in over his head everywhere but the ring, where he’s an idiot savant. That’s a good character and something that plays to both WWE’s creativity (which can exist) and Eugene’s in-ring skills. Everyone wins and I’m looking forward to the match next week.

Preview for next week. Again: give them a reason to tune in because they want to see matches instead of asking them to tune in and find out that it’s a good show. It also helps when you have the show planned that far in advance.

Before the main event, Bischoff makes Christian vs. Jericho in a cage for next week.

Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Benoit

Shawn is challenging and they have a lot of time, as they should. An aggressive Benoit goes straight at Shawn in the corner but the referee makes a bit of a forced break. They do it again and now it’s time to start slugging away for a few moments. A headlock doesn’t keep Benoit down long as he’s right back with a backdrop and a clothesline to put Shawn on the floor. The announcers talk about Shawn being born here, with JR pointing out that not many people are going to notice, or likely care.

Shawn gets in a neckbreaker, followed by the flying forearm into the nipup. Benoit can’t get the Crossface in either of two attempts so Shawn hits him in the head again. Back from a very abrupt break with Shawn holding an abdominal stretch, allowing Lawler to plug next week’s matches again. One heck of a whip into the corner just wakes Benoit up as he rattles off some rollups for near falls.

Shawn atomic drops him down again, which Lawler thinks has the fans cheering because Shawn is from Phoenix. The top rope elbow connects but Sweet Chin Music is countered into the rolling German suplexes. Benoit hits four in a row but misses the Swan Dive to put them both down. Shawn goes up again, only to get caught with chops and some very angry stomps to put him in trouble.

Benoit loads up a suplex but gets suplexed out to the floor instead. The moonsault to the floor takes Benoit down again and Michaels’ tights coming down far lower than they need to be. He’s fine enough to whip Benoit knees first into the steps and head first into the post to bust him open as we take another break. Back again with Benoit fighting out of a sleeper and getting two off a bridging German suplex.

Shawn grabs the Walls of all things but Benoit makes a rope as we keep going (not a bad thing). The Crossface goes on and Shawn is in trouble until he gets his foot on the rope. With that not working, Benoit tries the Sharpshooter but gets kicked into the referee. Of course Sweet Chin Music connects a few seconds later but there’s no one to count. Cue HHH (erg) for a Pedigree to Shawn (Benoit didn’t see it) to give Benoit the retaining pin.

Rating: B+. Dang it they had me believing that HHH might actually stay out of the main event scene for a few weeks. This is either leading to HHH vs. Shawn (again) or Shawn wanting ONE MORE TITLE MATCH (again) because that’s the only way the World Title scene seems to be able to go for Benoit. HHH and Shawn need to just stay far apart for a long time but that’s not going to happen anytime soon, because they need to take over the show again and again.

HHH laughs to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. What more can you ask for? The very good Eugene sequence, two very good to great matches and setting things up for later on. There’s very little that they’re not doing anything at the moment and it’s almost hard to believe that this is Raw. I’m not used to having a show where I can’t make fun of that much but they’re managing to do it as of late.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 26, 2004
Location: Landon Arena, Topeka, Kansas
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

They don’t have to go far to beat Smackdown this week. We’re still a week away from the big Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Benoit title match so you can probably bet on a lot of hype for that one tonight. Other than that Edge and Benoit are the new Tag Team Champions and Evolution won’t be happy. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Shawn challenging Benoit last week and Benoit and Edge winning the titles.

Opening sequence.

Lita/Victoria vs. Gail Kim/Molly Holly

Lita is especially smiley this week while Molly’s hair is now longer, brown and curly. Victoria and Gail start things off and it’s a very early dancing moonsault (again with the camera facing Victoria’s front) for two. Molly comes in for a quickly broken cravate so it’s off to Gail to keep beating on Victoria. An elbow knocks Lita off the apron and Gail grabs a Black Widow to take Victoria down. That’s broken up pretty quickly and the hot tag brings in Lita to clean house. A spinning belly to back suplex gets two on Gail and Molly loses the wig. Molly sends Victoria into the barricade, leaving Lita to DDT Gail for the pin.

Rating: D+. Not terrible as they take care of the issue from Backlash. It’s not like the women’s division means anything at the moment (and it hasn’t for years) so having the women trade wins don’t exactly help or hurt anything. They kept it short here and nothing was terribly botched so that’s about all you can ask for.

Post match Molly beats up Lita some more but here’s Kane of all people to interrupt. Just like last week Lita isn’t smart enough to roll under the bottom rope and get out so Kane strokes her cheek and smells her neck. She finally runs away and, after a break, runs into Matt Hardy in the back. Matt says he’s facing Kane tonight and he’ll take care of her. Kane shows up and beats Matt down as Lita wisely runs for a change.

Post break HHH goes into Bischoff’s office and yells at a plant (as in a potted plant) about wanting Tajiri tonight. Eric leaves and HHH yells at the empty room. Because he can’t see.

Rob Conway vs. Rhyno

Eugene and William Regal show up at commentary. Eugene: “French Canadians! Pat Patterson first Intercontinental Champion Rio de Janeiro 1979!” JR to Lawler: “You didn’t even know that.” The USA chants begin and Eugene joins in before heading down next to the Titantron for some cartwheels. Rhyno gets two off a belly to belly but gets thrown over the top.

Conway chokes on the ropes as Eugene has stolen some popcorn and come back to commentary. Regal: “No don’t put that in your ear!” Conway gets two off a kick to the ribs and the referee is nearly jumping as he counts the two. Eugene is over in the tech area as Conway whips Rhyno into the corner and gets two off a clothesline. Some pyro goes off thanks to Eugene pushing buttons, allowing Rhyno to hit a Gore (the only significant offense of the match) for the pin.

Rating: D. The wrestling was just a backdrop for the Eugene stuff but it feels like innocent, harmless fun. That’s the way they should be treating him and Regal as the funny straight man is the perfect foil. This was a lot of fun and I’m starting to remember why I was a big fan of the guy back in the day.

Post break La Resistance wants to fight Eugene tonight but Regal says that can’t happen. Johnny Nitro makes Eugene vs. Conway in two weeks.

Edge and Benoit are cut off by Shawn, who reminds him of their match next week. Shawn leaves and Edge wants Benoit to stay focused on tonight.

Here are Christian, Trish Stratus and Tyson Tomko for a chat before a match. Christian talks about Jericho being a problem and needing a problem solver.

Christian vs. Grandmaster Sexay

Sexay gets jumped to start as JR goes back to the 1800s for insults about Trish. A flapjack lets Sexay dance a bit and a middle rope dropkick gets two. The reverse DDT is broken up and a cactus crossbody puts them both on the floor. Back in and Tomko offers a distraction to break up the Hip Hop Drop. The Unprettier gives Christian the easy pin.

Post match Tomko kicks Sexay in the face but Jericho’s music hits. Tomko is sent into the aisle but Jericho comes in through the crowd and gets Trish in the Walls for all of two seconds.

HHH vs. Tajiri

HHH, with a somewhat green face, is still wiping his eyes and hammers away to start. Tajiri gets choked on the mat as the fans remind HHH that he tapped out. Some kicks knock HHH down and the handspring elbow gets two as the fans are already into this one. That’s enough to send HHH outside for a breather but Tajiri smacks him in the face and sends him head first into the steps. HHH gets back in at nine and the Buzzsaw kick is blocked.

Tajiri kicks away even more but walks into the spinebuster as Lawler makes more and more jokes about Tajiri’s accent. A hard whip sends Tajiri into the corner but he’s right back with a spinwheel kick. The Octopus Hold is countered by a HHH hiptoss and the Tarantula doesn’t go on full. Instead Tajiri goes with a missile dropkick that knocks HHH into the referee. The mist misses though and the Pedigree finally finishes Tajiri.

Rating: C+. This was much better than I was expecting with Tajiri working hard and HHH actually giving him a lot. You don’t see a midcarder going move for move like this with a top star very often and it makes for a very refreshing match. HHH didn’t lose anything here and Tajiri looked better than he has in a long time. Now why can’t we get something like this a little more often?

We recap the Lita/Kane/Matt Hardy stuff.

Kane vs. Matt Hardy

Matt, who always meets his deadlines, can barely walk to the ring. Kane wastes no time in beating him down and chokes on the ropes. A whip sends Matt chest first into the buckle and there’s the chokeslam. Kane chokeslams him again but Lita runs in to save Matt from the Tombstone. Lita lets him kiss her and Kane walks out. Angle instead of a match.

Victoria tried to get people to vote.

Lawler is in the ring to promote the Divas Magazine, because he’s the only one you could get to talk about the thing. We see some shots on the Titantron and here’s Stacy Keibler to help things out. What is she doing here you ask? Meeting Harley Race, sitting in the front row, of course. Therefore cue Randy Orton as JR panics. Orton says he’s the only real legend around here and has already accomplished more than Race has in his whole career. Race shaking his head is worth a chuckle and Orton goes out to spit on him. That draws Race over the barricade but Shelton Benjamin (hey he’s still here) to jump Orton for the save.

Smackdown Rebound. That show needs no more attention.

Batista and Flair want their titles back. Apparently Batista hasn’t been able to sleep since losing the titles and that will NEVER happen again. He screams everything he says here but does earn himself a WOO.

Tag Team Titles: Ric Flair/Batista vs. Edge/Chris Benoit

Benoit and Edge are defending and Edge still has a cast on his hand. Flair and Benoit hit the mat for an early standoff with Flair slicking the hair back. With the technical stuff not interesting him, Benoit chops in the corner and hits a backdrop. Flair goes for the leg (well duh) and it’s already off to Batista. Edge comes in as well and stomps the big man down in the corner until the running clothesline takes his head off.

Flair comes back in and gets taken down into a weird looking half crab (Edge is turned halfway around instead of facing backwards), followed by a Figure Four as tends to be required in Flair matches. Of course Flair knows the counter so it’s back to Benoit for more chops and a Flair Flop (earning some appreciative applause). Benoit chops him so much that it’s a second Flop but Edge walks into an atomic drop.

A knee to the back sends Edge hard into the corner and Batista sends the bad hand into the steps as we take a break. Back with Edge sending Batista face first into the buckle and the hot tag bringing in Benoit. They’re not wasting time with this one. Everything breaks down and Flair is clotheslined to the floor, leaving Batista to take the rolling German suplexes. The Swan Dive sets up the Crossface but Flair is back in for the save.

We settle back into the standard operating procedure here with Flair tossing Benoit into the corner and Batista adds a suplex. The half crab keeps Benoit in trouble and Flair gets two off a chop. You don’t chop with Benoit so Flair takes him down by the legs to bring Batista back in. An enziguri gets Benoit out of trouble and the hot tag brings in Edge. Everything breaks down again and Batista spinebusts Benoit. That allows Flair to load up the Figure Four, only to eat the spear to retain the titles.

Rating: B. Hot tag match here with a clean finish, which is a lot more than I was expecting. They’re rolling with the idea of longer wrestling matches at the moment and that makes for a very fun ending like this one. Edge and Benoit’s roll continues and Edge’s feud with Kane is forgotten more every week, thank goodness.

Post match HHH comes in to beat the Canadians down but here’s Shawn for the save with a chair. He hits Benoit by mistake (dun dun dun) and that’s not cool with Edge. They calm down but Benoit is up with the Sharpshooter to Shawn to end the show. Good way to set up next week’s title match.

Overall Rating: B-. There’s some stuff on here that isn’t as entertaining as the rest but it’s such an easy show to watch and they’re making it a lot of fun every single week. Above all else they’re not just focusing on one or two things and leaving the rest out to dry. Build up the entire show and the good parts will look even better as a result. If you happen to get something fun like Eugene as a bonus, it’s even better. Another good show this week.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 22, 1996
Location: Orange Pavilion, San Bernardino, California
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for In Your House and the big deal this week is a match that will have nothing to do with the pay per view. The Intercontinental Title is vacant and instead of having it decided on Sunday, we’re getting the second half of a taped angle that will likely put us right back where we started for Sunday’s title match. I’m not sure why anyone would do that but let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Intercontinental Title: Goldust vs. Savio Vega

The title is vacant coming in after Vega hit Goldust with the belt to win the title last week. They slug it out to start with a lot more energy than the first match had to begin. A clothesline and powerslam give Vega two so Goldust bails, earning himself a superkick in the aisle. Back in and Goldust is fine enough to miss a splash in the corner but a low blow cuts Vega off. Lawler starts talking about various news stories because that’s still a thing we do on Raw.

Goldust starts in on the leg by wrapping it around the rope but an enziguri drops Goldust to send us to a break. Back with Goldust staying on the leg and Lawler still reading news. It’s off to a reverse chinlock as things slow way down in a hurry. With the hold boring the life out of the crowd, here’s a promo from Ultimate Warrior, who promises to make Goldust a squealing pig on Sunday. Great: Warrior Does Deliverance. Back to the full screen, Goldust’s cannonball onto the back hits a raised knee but he’s fine enough to drop a leg for two. The announcers talk about the NFL Draft as Goldust gets pulled into the post.

Cue Ted DiBiase and Steve Austin as Vega’s splash hits knees to send us to a break. We come back again with Vega slipping out of the Curtain Call and kicking Goldust in the face. At least he limped a bit between the landing and the kick. Marlena gets on the apron for no apparent reason, meaning there’s no count for Vega’s rollup, which only started after Marlena was on the apron. Austin blasts Vega with the Million Dollar Title and Goldust gets the title back.

Rating: C. This got things back to normal, though I’m not sure what the point was in having the title vacated and giving Goldust another reign as a result. Austin interfering is a good idea and keeps his feud with Vega going, but none of this matters as Goldust injured his knee in between the time this was taped and Sunday. Therefore, Sunday’s match would wind up being as big of a disaster as you could possibly imagine.

Vader vs. Fatu

Somehow Fatu is in the Hall of Fame and Vader isn’t because things aren’t fair in wrestling. We’re joined in progress with Vader forearming him down but missing a seated splash. A running Stunner (a weird move for a big guy) puts Vader down and Fatu’s top rope splash gets no cover as Vader pops up. Fatu gets run over and the debuting Vadersault (with Vince underselling the heck out of it) is good for the pin in a hurry.

We see a clip of Jake Roberts DDTing Owen Hart in German but British Bulldog ran in for the DQ. Jake fought back and gave him a DDT as well, plus put the snake on him for a bonus.

Godwinns vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri/Tim Patterson

Yes that Tajiri. Lawler is off commentary to do something in the back so Vince gets to enjoy some hillbillies on his own. The Bodydonnas and Sunny pop in to brag about being champions, which the Godwinns will never be again. Lawler is back, having seen a surprise that Sunny has planned. Tajiri kicks Phineas down to start and hits the standing moonsault for two. Patterson comes in and gets bearhugged by Patterson as Sunny comes out with the titles. That earns her a chase from Hillbilly Jim’s hunting dog because hillbillies like to hunt. Back in the ring, Patterson gets beaten down and the Slop Drop is good for the pin.

Rating: D. I liked the Godwinns when I was a kid but sweet goodness they don’t hold up well. They’re not funny, it’s one joke, and they’re fighting against two exercise enthusiasts who are somehow the more interesting team of the two. The Sunny thing was just kind of there and added nothing, but at least the visuals were a bit better.

Post match the Bodydonnas jump the Godwinns and shove slop in Phineas’ face.

Mankind vs. Aldo Montoya

Mankind stands in the corner so Aldo dropkicks him, only to be headbutted away. The speeding up right hands in the corner keep Aldo in trouble and Mankind pulls some hair out for fun. You can tell the fans have no idea what to make of Mankind, which is the same reaction that Undertaker received when he debuted. The running knee in the corner rocks Aldo and we take a break. Back with Aldo getting in some right hands but diving into a shot to the face. The Tree of Woe elbow sets up the piledriver and the Mandible Claw completes the squash.

Rating: D+. Just a quick win, even with the rather unnecessary commercial in the middle. Mankind was just a different kind of weird and is one of the creepiest characters ever. You could tell there was something very special about him and that’s the kind of opponent Undertaker needed. Beating up the same giants over and over is only going to last so long (just ask Hulk Hogan) so going with something like this was a necessary as well as very effective move.

Video on Shawn Michaels vs. Diesel. We go over their whole history, which is actually quite the well put together story. It’s why you hear “they can be like Shawn and Diesel” so often today.

Diesel, sounding a bit drunk, joins us from German to say he’s going to hurt Shawn.

Some random people playing guitars take us out.

Overall Rating: D. That’s supposed to make me want to see a pay per view? The closing video was rather good but that’s three minutes on a forty minute show, which really isn’t a strong average. That being said, Sunday is the textbook example of a one match show so focusing the important efforts on that is about as good of an idea as you can have. So much for the hot streak from earlier in the month.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the NXT The Full Sail Years Volume III (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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Smackdown
Date: September 4, 2003
Location: New Orleans Arena, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’ve got a big main event this time around as Smackdown World Champion Kurt Angle is defending against the Undertaker, who won a triple threat last week to earn the shot. Brock Lesnar is looming though and there’s a good chance that’s not going to end well. At the same time though we have the freshly face Eddie Guerrero spreading his awesomeness all over the place and that’s more than enough around here. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s triple threat with Undertaker winning the title shot.

Opening sequence, which actually still has Rock included. I can’t even remember the last time he was on this show.

Tag Team Titles: APA vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team

The APA is challenging…..for some reason. Faarooq powerslams Haas for two to start but Benjamin gets in a shot from behind to take over. The jump over Haas (which barely clears his head) crushes Faarooq’s back and the double stomping continues. Haas grabs a bearhug (not something you would expect from him) before tripping Faarooq down for two.

Now it’s Haas going up top but diving into a powerslam, allowing the hot tag to Bradshaw. A fall away slam and big boot drop the champs as everything breaks down. Bradshaw pulls Benjamin outside, leaving Faarooq to hit a spinebuster on Haas for two. Benjamin’s superkick gets two on Faarooq so Bradshaw takes his head off with the Clothesline. Haas gets the foot on the rope though and a belt shot lets the champs retain.

Rating: D+. Actually somewhat better match than I was expecting here and thankfully the APA were just there to give the champs a rub. The division needs some more teams though and having the APA thrown in there for a week is fine enough until we get some fresh acts. Not a bad match, though the ending didn’t do the champs a ton of good.

Eddie Guerrero is polishing his low rider and the US Title when the long black limo arrives. This time it’s Big Show, Sable and Vince, who seem to like Eddie’s car. Brock Lesnar shows up and wants to know why Vince hasn’t talked to him much since Summerslam. Maybe because he’s been busy with Brock’s future wife? It’s because Brock tapped out (Brock REALLY doesn’t want to hear that) but Vince will talk to him later.

Post break, Brock is in Vince’s office where the boss slaps him in the face as a wake up call. It seems to do the trick as Brock grabs him, only to be calmed down when Vince tells him to be a monster. Maybe now he can tap to Benoit or someone else instead of ripping through the roster?

Here’s John Cena for a chat. Cena wants to know why Eddie is waxing the car. Is it dirty, or is he worried that Cena will “jack it with a Compton quickness”? We see a clip of Cena beating Eddie up last week and giving him an AA onto the tire. Cena thinks Eddie should be mowing his lawn because he used him like a girl from a Girls Gone Wild video.

After calling Eddie a rather mean name, here comes the low rider. The fight is on in a hurry with Cena getting the better of it off a belt shot. He’s not done either as he steals the low rider, much to Eddie’s chagrin. Eddie is so shocked that he can’t get out of the ring and chase after the car, which must be going a full four miles an hour as it backs out of the arena.

Post break, after Cena has left the arena, Eddie rants to Stephanie about the car. A Latino street fight in the parking lot is made for next week. Maybe by that point Eddie will figure out how to catch up with a car backing up in slow motion.

Chris Benoit vs. A-Train

Rematch from last week where A-Train tapped with his legs under the ropes. Benoit sticks and moves to start but the chops don’t have much effect. A running elbow in the corner has an effect on Benoit though and A-Train whips him hard in the corner to start on the ribs. We’re already off to a chinlock with a knee in Benoit’s back as A-Train actually has some psychology.

A butterfly suplex of all things gets two on Benoit and we hit the bearhug. Benoit fights out and hits some running forearms, followed by the rolling German suplexes. The Swan Dive misses and the Train Wreck gets two but the referee gets bumped. Cue Rhyno to try a Gore on Benoit, only to hit A-Train by mistake to give Benoit the pin.

Rating: C-. A-Train working the back made sense but are they really spending back to back weeks protecting him? He’s that important? Anyway, Rhyno vs. Benoit should be fine for a one off match but it shouldn’t be any more than that. Benoit needs to move on to something important, especially after spending months with Rhyno in one form or another.

Undertaker praises Angle but says he’s not tapping to the ankle lock even if his ankle is broken. Then he’ll show Angle what a real submission is with the dragon sleeper. If that doesn’t work, maybe it’s a chokeslam or a Tombstone or a Last Ride but he’s leaving with the title. It’s almost weird to hear Undertaker talk like this.

Earlier today, Torrie Wilson and Nidia compared how they look in bikinis for the sake of a bikini contest which took place before the show. Nidia puts in her false breasts and they dance for no apparent reason. Nidia rubs lotion on Torrie’s back, which Torrie seems to like. Is it really already time for another Torrie likes girls story?

Angle promises to make Undertaker tap.

Vince has taken over Stephanie’s office where Brock is apparently slamming things into a wall. Sable is nowhere to be seen and….egads ok then.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is challenging. Angle grabs a front facelock to start so Undertaker grabs a wristlock and cranks away. That earns him a headlock on the mat as they seem to have a lot of time here. Undertaker drops a leg on the arm and cranks on a short armscissors. An armbar of all things sets up Old School but Angle suplexes him right back down.

Undertaker’s solution is to punch Angle in the face, followed by an elbow to the chest on the apron. The apron legdrop drops Angle to the floor and Undertaker posts him for good measure. Back from a break with Undertaker still in control and amazingly not using a chinlock. Angle grabs a sleeper but gets suplexed down, leaving Undertaker to slap himself in the head. Well at least he’s taking this one seriously.

Undertaker’s dragon sleeper is broken up in short order so he goes with the running corner clothesline. Snake Eyes into the running big boot looks to set up a legdrop but Kurt picks the ankle. It’s way too early for a tap out so Angle switches to the Slam for two instead. A second Angle Slam is countered into a chokeslam for two more.

Angle reverses the Last Ride into a sunset flip and then the ankle lock but this time Undertaker pulls him down into a Fujiwara armbar. That’s rolled over into another ankle lock but Undertaker reverses again into a triangle choke. Angle’s arm drops twice so he gets his foot on the ropes for the break.

Undertaker limps into a big boot but only hits ropes, allowing Angle to slap on the ankle lock for a few more seconds. A shot to the face has Angle bleeding from the cheek and Undertaker slugs away for good measure. The chokeslam is countered into the fifth ankle lock and, again, Undertaker rolls out of it. The ankle is fine enough for a chokeslam and the Last Ride but here’s Brock with a chair to beat them both down for the DQ.

Rating: B-. This didn’t hit the level these two are capable of and the ankle lock seemingly not causing Undertaker much discomfort didn’t help things. It felt like they were just doing their thing until we got to the finish, which didn’t give us much drama. What we got was good, but it’s really hard to buy the threat of Undertaker tapping, even to someone like Angle.

Brock destroys them both with chair and belt shots.

Post break, Undertaker refuses attention until he collapses.

Angle just settles for some ice.

Some New Orleans Saints are here.

There was a bikini contest earlier today and it’s trimmed to a highlight package. How in the world can you screw up having good looking women walk around in swimsuits? It’s Sable, Dawn Marie, Nidia and Torrie in Mardi Gras themed attire before they disrobe. Torrie wins but Shaniqua runs in and beats them all down. I’m really hoping this was cut due to time instead of content because that would be a new low even for WWE.

The APA isn’t happy with their loss but the office is back. They even have a red bow on the door and a butler (Bradshaw: “I won him in a poker game. I even have a deed for him!”) to present them with cigars and beer. This might be better if they hadn’t lost earlier in the night but we’re not supposed to remember that part. Well assuming you ignored what they talked about to start the segment.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Tajiri

Rey is defending. They start fast with Rey armdragging him down, only to have us go into a standoff. Rey tries a headscissors out of the corner but lands on the referee, who is nice enough to throw him off so he can flip Tajiri over. The springboard is broken up with a superkick and Rey is rocked on the apron. He’s fine enough to miss a 619 though and Tajiri kicks him in the back to knock him outside.

Cole brags about Mysterio defending the title week after week the last few weeks (this is his second title defense in two weeks Cole) as the handspring elbow is broken up with a spinwheel kick. Back from a break with Tajiri kicking him out of the air and grabbing a hammerlock. Not exactly a move you expect to see so late into a match. Rey sends him outside and hits a hard suicide dive to take both guys down.

Back in and Tajiri blocks a sunset bomb with right hands but it’s Rey kicking him down for two. The sitout bulldog (which isn’t innovative Cole) gets two and the springboard seated senton gets the same. A hard kick to the arm drops Rey for two more and we hit the Tarantula.

Rey is right back with the 619 but the springboard splash hits raised boots to the face. Mysterio is fine enough to try his own Tarantula but Tajiri breaks it up without too much effort. They head up top with Tajiri getting shoved down, setting up the West Coast Pop from the turnbuckle to retain.

Rating: B. Solid wrestling match here with Rey getting tested. Who would have guessed that Rey Mysterio and Tajiri would have a good match if they were given a long stretch of time? Hopefully this goes somewhere else with Rey getting to defend the title against the top cruiserweights, which is kind of the point of the title in the first place. Good match, as you probably expected.

Post match Tajiri mists him to turn heel again.

Here are Vince and Big Show for the big closing segment. Vince didn’t like that DQ finish earlier so Angle will be defending the title again. In two weeks, it’s Angle vs. Lesnar in a sixty minute Iron Man match right here on Smackdown. Oddly enough, Vince is very low key in the announcement. Vince brings out Brock….who isn’t here.

Brock pops up in a sky box and thanks Vince for reminding him of who he is. Earlier tonight he proved who he is by attacking Undertaker and Angle. We pause for the YOU TAPPED OUT chants before Brock talks about what went on behind those closed doors earlier. Brock was, shall we saw, softening up someone who needed to be taught a lesson. Brock steps aside and Zach Gowen is in a wheelchair with a gag around his mouth.

Brock slaps him in the broken leg and talks about the wheelchair being jet powered. Gowen panics (well duh) and Brock wheels him back to the concourse where he throws Zach out of the chair. Zach crawls away (without taking the gag off for some reason) but Brock kicks him in the broken leg. Brock talks about wanting to be the monster and we cut back to Vince looking curious.

More stomps to the leg keep Gowen in trouble before Lesnar talks about the chair being magical. See, it can fly, and Brock is going to prove it. Gowen is sat in the chair and Brock chokes him out before shoving Gowen down the steps (complete with a camera cut to Vince before the big fall) to end the show.

This was rather long as Brock had him in the stairwell for above five minutes. I get the idea here of making Brock out to be a monster, but didn’t they do that when Brock caved Gowen’s head in and broke his leg in the first place? I think we’ve covered this already and it might have been a bit more effective if he hadn’t lost to Angle clean at Summerslam. The scene was effective but the camera cut hurt it a bit and it went on a tad too long. Hopefully that gets rid of Gowen for a little while longer as there’s only so much you can get out of having him around.

Overall Rating: C+. Two long and entertaining matches are more than enough to carry this show as we flash back to the glory days of Smackdown for a week. The Iron Man match has some serious potential as they’ll have time to do whatever they want, which is often lacking around here. Throw in booking Eddie vs. Cena a week in advance and it’s almost like they’re thinking ahead for once. This was a fun show and, stupid parts aside, gives me hope that Smackdown might be on its way back up.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the 2018 Updated Version of the History of the WWE Championship in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

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Smackdown
Date: August 7, 2003
Location: Skyreach Place, Kelowna, British Columbia, Canada
Commentators: Tazz, Michael Cole

Smackdown has some work to do to catch up with Raw, which announced an Elimination Chamber match for the upcoming Summerslam. Tonight Smackdown has a big match of its own though with Brock Lesnar vs. Vince McMahon in a cage with Kurt Angle as guest referee. Why that’s a big deal isn’t clear, but note that we’ll be having two McMahons in main events this week, meaning the ratings should be through the roof. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Kurt Angle giving Brock a rematch for the title but being cut off by Vince. For some reason Vince agreed to face Brock in a cage tonight. You really can feel the shenanigans coming here and in this case that works best. Just because you can see the ending doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing.

Opening sequence.

Chris Benoit vs. Eddie Guerrero

Non-title despite Benoit asking for the title to be on the line. Eddie picks the leg to start and they hit the mat for a technical sequence as you might have expected from these two. The Canadian fans are VERY pro-Benoit (well duh) but an Eddie chant pops up as well because Eddie is just on another level at this point.

Benoit backdrops his way out of a wristlock and Eddie bails to the ropes before Benoit can grab a hold of his own. Instead some insanely loud chops have Eddie begging for time out but he’s still able to snapmare him down and take over again. A slingshot hilo and belly to back suplex give Eddie two and it’s off to an armbar.

Back up and Benoit grabs a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker (stealing both Eddie’s move and gimmick), followed by a very hard powerbomb. Cue Rhyno to break up the Swan Dive but Benoit avoids the frog splash. A dive takes Rhyno down, only to have Tajiri come in and take Eddie down for the DQ.

Rating: C+. Even with the lame ending, Eddie vs. Benoit in any form is worth seeing. They didn’t have very long here but they managed to get something out of it because they’re that popular. Having the Canadian fans cheer for Eddie shows you what kind of a roll he’s on at the moment and that’s an incredibly positive sign for Guerrero. It’s also a good sign that they were doing the technical stuff here, making the US Title feel more like the wrestlers’ title. Almost no title has an identity and this one having such a thing and doing it well so far hopefully is a sign of things to come.

They keep brawling but Sgt. Slaughter of all people (like Stephanie would lower herself to this) says we’re going to restart this as a tag match. Now I need to see Slaughter doing the Teddy Long dance.

Chris Benoit/Tajiri vs. Rhyno/Eddie Guerrero

Joined in progress with Benoit getting the Crossface on Rhyno and Eddie having to make a save. Eddie comes in legally with a hurricanrana but Tajiri makes a save this time around. A baseball slide dropkick takes Eddie’s knee out and now Tajiri can come in legally. The handspring elbow drops Rhyno as they’re working a very nice pace to start things off.

Tajiri goes after Eddie but gets run over by Rhyno. That just earns him a Tarantula but Eddie is there with a dropkick for his own save. Rhyno actually puts on a Sharpshooter, drawing Benoit in to protect Canada’s honor. He’s fine with Eddie’s half crab though, suggesting that he’s not much of a Lance Storm fan. Rhyno comes in for some forearms as Benoit’s save attempt goes nowhere.

Instead it’s Eddie getting backdropped to the floor and Tajiri makes the tag, albeit thanks to Rhyno knocking him into Benoit. With Benoit on the floor, Rhyno powerbombs Tajiri but gets misted (with the referee looking at them). Eddie didn’t see the tag and frog splashes the illegal Tajiri, only to get caught in the Crossface for the tap.

Rating: B-. It was certainly a creative ending and odds are this sets up a big title match, perhaps with all four fighting at the same time. As mentioned earlier, this is the kind of wrestling that makes the show a lot more interesting and I’d really like to see it happen a lot more often. Benoit and Eddie are the wrestlers so it’s a smart idea to throw in a striker like Tajiri and a power guy like Rhyno to really even things out.

Josh Matthews (looking as stupid as I’ve ever seen him with two necklaces and an earring) asks Kurt Angle about some rumors, but Kurt cuts him off. Kurt has been hearing rumors about Josh, scotch tape, two midgets and a picture of Justin Timberlake that still keeps him up nights. He’s heard the rumors about Brock, who he still considers a friend. A big stupid friend at times, but still a friend. They’re going to resolve their issues face to face though.

Zach Gowen vs. Nunzio

Matt Hardy, who puts ketchup on one fry at a time and is a better commentator than Michael Cole, is on commentary and brought Shannon Moore with him. Gowen takes him down to the mat to start but is easily powered into the corner. Nunzio grabs the leg and mocks his inability to sweep the other leg as Matt complains about having to share the stage with a sideshow freak. As cruel as he sounds, there’s really nothing wrong about what he says.

A quick leglock is broken up and Nunzio sends him outside. Gowen gets turned inside out with a clothesline and we hit the chinlock. Matt: “Everybody knows that Matt Hardy’s career has more legs underneath it than Zach Gowen’s.”. Back up and Nunzio crotches himself and a middle rope moonsault hits him in the ropes. A leg lariat and a middle rope Fameasser both get the same. Gowen grabs a neckbreaker but has to elbow Shannon down, allowing Nunzio to hit a top rope dropkick for the pin.

Rating: C-. That’s on a bit of a sliding scale and that’s the problem: you have to adjust everything for Gowen and the matches are only going to be so good. He has to have a select group of opponents and his offense is almost all based around that one leg. It’s nothing special in the first place and when your entire character is based around your one trait, it’s not like you have much of a shelf life. Gowen is incredible impressive, but this isn’t going to work for very long.

Post match, Gowen takes another Twist of Fate.

Undertaker finds Sable sitting on Vince’s laugh and asks her to leave. He’s not happy with Vince sending A-Train after Stephanie so the little “oil hoochie” could get a win at Vengeance. If Undertaker was part of the family, he’d have already beaten the heck out of Vince. The boss is about to tell Undertaker what he can do with that opinion when Funaki comes running in to say Brock has been attacked. Angle and the FBI are near him and Vince gives Kurt a look without saying anything. You can feel the twist coming from here and it’s still working just fine.

Undertaker vs. John Cena

Undertaker beat him at Vengeance in a match that hurt a lot of Cena’s credibility. Cena’s rap implies he wants to force sexual acts onto Undertaker. The big man wastes no time in sending him into the corner and the slow beating begins. He starts in on Cena’s shoulder as the fans think Cena sucks. A hard clothesline looks to set up Old School but Cena pulls him down, somehow knowing what to expect.

Cena starts in on the knee, only to get his arm pulled down again. A lifting wristlock keeps Undertaker in trouble as they must have a long time here. Now Old School connects and the slow paced beating heads outside. Totally one sided so far. Back in and Undertaker actually takes him all the way to the top for a superplex but Undertaker bangs up his own ribs.

Back from a break with Cena in control and pounding on the ribs. They had something here with Cena having such a basic offense but sticking with it because it was the most logical thing he had. Undertaker shrugs it off and posts Cena on the floor because he’s had enough of being on defense for now. In a good example of everything wrong with commentary, Cole keeps mentioning the bad ribs and Tazz yells at him for saying it over and over. Heaven forbid he tell a story or something.

The Throwback gives Cena two but a big boot and elbow give Undertaker the same. Cena’s spinebuster goes back to the ribs but Undertaker mounts him for some rights and lefts. The Last Ride is broken up and the ref is bumped. Now didn’t we all know something like that was coming? The chokeslam gets no cover and it’s A-Train coming in for a bicycle kick and a backbreaker. That’s only good for two on Undertaker so he tries the Tombstone, only to get reversed into the FU for the pin.

Rating: D+. They really didn’t need this much time, especially with the arm work going nowhere. Undertaker vs. A-Train isn’t going to be much to see and this seemed to be more about setting that up than helping Cena. That being said, it helped a lot to have Cena get the win off his own move instead of A-Train’s. Cena needed a win like this and you knew full well they weren’t giving Cena a clean pin, either here or at the pay per view. The match wasn’t very good because of the slow pace and the ending didn’t really help things.

Jamie Noble vs. Doug Basham

Shaniqua gives Doug a spank for inspiration and the announcers laugh the whole thing off. Jamie, apparently a face for getting to sleep with Torrie and Nidia (ok they’ve got something there), kicks Doug away but gets caught with some crossface shots to the head. A Vader Bomb elbow gives Doug two as Tazz goes on and on about what Shaniqua does with the Bashams.

The move that would become known as Wasteland gives Doug two and we hit the chinlock. Jamie fights up with a clothesline and dropkick for a near fall each. A top rope elbow looks to finish but Danny distracts the referee. Not that it matters as Jamie gets a small package for the pin.

Rating: D. Commentary made this one insufferable and I don’t see it getting much better. I’m sure there was nothing better for WWE to do than spend years on the Bashams in OVW before bringing them up as unintentionally comedic sex characters. On top of that they’re apparently feuding with a team that got together over group sex. Oh and the boss is having an affair with his mistress. You really shouldn’t need so much of the same theme on one show.

Post match the beatdown is on until Billy Gunn makes the save.

Angle denies attacking Lesnar. I’d believe him.

Next week, Haas and Benjamin defend against Mysterio and Kidman. That would be another week where the Cruiserweight Title isn’t so much as mentioned.

Rey Mysterio vs. Charlie Haas

Non-title of course. Haas takes him down without much effort to start and takes Rey’s head off with a hard clothesline. A hard whip into the corner starts working on Rey’s back and it’s off to something like a torture rack with Tazz referencing the luchador Atlantis of all people. Back up and Charlie misses a charge, allowing Rey to hit a springboard flipping seated senton for two, followed by a springboard spinning crossbody (with Haas having to run over to catch him). The 619 connects but a hurricanrana is countered into the Haas of Pain for the tap.

Rating: C. Charlie got to show off here and a clean win over Mysterio is quite the accomplishment. It’s a very good sign that both he and Benjamin can have solid singles matches and more proof of how great an amateur background is. Even if nothing else is working, just taking them down to the mat is a good way to get through parts of a match. Mysterio as a tag guy is fine, but get the title off of him already. The problem though is finding someone to put it on as the division basically doesn’t exist. On a related note, what the heck happened to Ultimo Dragon? He was around all of two weeks and then vanished.

The cage is lowered.

We recap Brock’s injury.

Angle leaves Vince’s office.

Brock Lesnar vs. Vince McMahon

In a cage with Angle as guest referee. Brock looks banged up but is easily able to shove Vince down twice in a row. The F5 is loaded up but Brock collapses. Angle won’t count the cover so Vince slaps him, earning himself an ankle lock. Brock of course nips up and F5’s Angle for the pretty obvious (not a bad thing) heel turn. No rating as the match doesn’t really end and wasn’t exactly a match in the first place.

A long, long beatdown ends the show. This is definitely the right move as Brock wasn’t working as the good guy and Lesnar vs. Angle II with Lesnar as the heel could be a lot more interesting. One last note: Brock and Vince pose with the camera panning from Vince’s face to Brock’s, who looks completely maniacal with his eyes bugging out for a really creepy visual.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s some very solid wrestling on here (see the first half hour) and Brock turning heel is a good move as Brock just wasn’t working in the role. Him working as Vince’s heavy is a far better use for his talents and gives him some new people to work against. At the same time though, anything below the midcard is basically death at the moment with stuff like Noble and Gunn being goofy wastes of time and Gowen still riding on momentum even though the foot was taken off the gas a long time ago. Get some better stuff on the bottom part of the card and Smackdown could be awesome all over again.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

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