ECW on TNN
Date: March 31, 2000
Location: Uptown Theater, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

After last week it isn’t clear who the top heels in the company are anymore. Mike Awesome and Raven seemed to be the featured act but it also looks like the Network is the main story. Odds are it’s the latter given that they got half the TV time last week, but you never can tell in ECW. Let’s get to it.

Joel and Joey get us going with both guys sucking up the Kansas City crowd. Joel talks about carrying this network and that brings out a Mexican speaking (his words, not mine) Cyrus, flanked by Tajiri. The fans want Heyman as Cyrus talks about bringing the fans Rollerjam (I loved that show actually) and says the Network is taking control tonight.

Tonight he’s going to fight Super Crazy for the TV Title because idiots like Tajiri aren’t getting the job done. Tajiri isn’t pleased but Cyrus threatens to revoke his work visa and send him back to Big Japan to do jobs to Abdullah the Butcher in thumbtack matches. Cyrus repeats that he’ll be fighting for the title in case someone didn’t get it the first time.

Opening sequence.

Danny Doring and Roadkill promise to get their hands on the Dangerous Alliance tonight. One of Da Baldies comes in and steals the camera time, triggering a brawl. The other Baldies come in and the good guys are laid out.

Hardcore Heaven is May 14.

Yoshihiro Tajiri vs. Little Guido

Feeling out process lasts about 8 seconds before Tajiri starts firing off kicks, only to be caught in a reverse powerbomb out of the corner. They head to the ramp for another HARD kick to take Guido down. It’s already table time but Guido comes back with a slingshot Fameasser to take over. Guido’s buddy Big Sal sends in a chair but Tajiri throws it at Guido, only to hit the table in the corner instead. A few chops put Tajiri down but he comes back with the handspring elbow as we take a break.

Back with Tajiri kicking Sal down and suplexing Guido onto the table for two. A big kick to the head puts Guido down again and Tajiri ties him up in the Tree of Woe for a baseball slide to drive the chair into his face. Off to a dragon sleeper but Guido gets his foot onto the ropes. Another handspring elbow is counntered into a neckbreaker and Tajiri is in some trouble. Not enough trouble to matter though as he counters a tornado DDT into a super brainbuster for the pin on Guido.

Rating: C-. By ECW standards this wasn’t too bad. The hardcore stuff continues to plague the company though, as these two were more than capable of having a good match without the table and chair and interference. ECW fans always brag about having good wrestling and all that jazz, but at this point it was very rare to see wrestling without hardcore on the side.

Mike Awesome says anyone can come try to take the title away from him.

The Sinister Minister is in an elevator for a tarot card reading about ECW. There isn’t much to say here as he just summarizes the current storylines in the company and makes a few unfunny jokes about some lower level people, such as Elektra used to be a B, but with the help of modern medicine she’s a DD. The ending is a surprise though as he starts laughing and Mikey Whipwreck comes in laughing just as hard and destroying the table.

Danny Doring/Roadkill vs. Da Baldies

Doring wants to make this a street fight because that never happens in ECW. There are three Baldies though so Doring brings out Tommy Dreamer to even things up. It’s a brawl to start of course with Grimes headbutting Dreamer low in the corner. Tommy finds a pizza cutter from somewhere and carves up Grimes for fun. Angel comes in for the save and clotheslines the invading Danny down as well. Doring comes back with a Stroke (G-Spot Sweep) to take Angel down, only to be taken down by a sitout Rock Bottom from DeVito.

Roadkill comes in with a great looking springboard clothesline and a Boss Man Slam for two. A Vader Bomb elbow crushes DeVito even more and here’s another table. Dreamer suplexes Grimes on the ramp but Roadkill misses a springboard splash through the table. Doring has a piece of guardrail and Dreamer puts a ladder on the corner. Da Baldies make a comeback and whip the non-Roadkill good guys into the ladder.

Three stereo low blows take the Baldies down but Dreamer gets powerbombed out of the corner to take him out again. Doring and Dreamer come back to snap the ladder into two Baldies’ faces. The rail is sent in but Grimes misses a Swanton bomb, landing on the steel. Dreamer DDTs Grimes onto the rail and a guillotine legdrop/top rope splash from Doring/Roadkill are enough for the pin.

Rating: D+. Usual ECW garbage brawl here but at least there was a story to it with Da Baldies trying to claim the bounty on Dreamer. Not a terrible match here as at least this time they advertised it as a street fight instead of a wrestling match. Again, at least it was short which helps a lot.

House show ads.

TV Title: Cyrus vs. Super Crazy

Before the match Cyrus reveals that it’s a SWERVE and there’s a new opponent.

TV Title: Rhyno vs. Super Crazy

Rhyno runs him over to start and takes Crazy’s head off with a clothesline. There’s a table in the corner less than two minutes into the match but Crazy comes back with a springboard spinwheel kick to the face. Rhyno heads to the floor and gets taken down by a nice plancha, drawing a big ECW chant. Back in and Crazy rains down right hands in the corner but Rhyno tosses Crazy into the air for a nice crazy. The Gore is countered with a drop toehold but Rhyno comes back with a powerbomb for a close two.

Rhyno stomps away in the corner and drops him throat first on the top rope. We hit the chinlock as the match slows down a lot. Jack Victory gets in a cheap shot from the floor to Crazy but the champion comes back with a quick springboard moonsault for two. Now it’s Rhyno in a chinlock but he comes back with something like a running powerbomb through the table. Crazy somehow kicks out at two before grabbing a quick victory roll for two. A third powerbomb gets two for Rhyno and here’s another table. Rhyno loads up a superplex, only to be countered into a sunset bomb through the table to retain Crazy’s title.

Rating: C-. There was a story here which is the main thing ECW matches often lack. I can live with the tables in there if the story makes sense, and Crazy overcoming the odds to beat Rhyno as clean as you can in ECW works well enough. Crazy is another guy that can go without all the extra stuff which makes it more annoying to see it water down his matches.

Post match the Network comes in and destroys Crazy until Sandman makes the quick (by his standards) save, but Rhyno Gores Sandman down. The Network poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. For an ECW show, this actually worked. The Network story is a good idea and fits the anti-establishment idea of ECW. There’s a story going through the episode here other than Raven vs. Dreamer and that’s what ECW needs more than anything. This wasn’t too bad but the hardcore stuff needs to be toned down.

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ECW on TNN
Date: March 24, 2000
Location: Ice House, Salem, New Hampshire
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

Things have changed a bit after the last PPV but it still isn’t anything worth seeing yet. Hopefully things can pick up a bit now that we have a new main story with Awesome and Raven teaming up as the new big bads. As long as I don’t have to sit through the hardcore nonsense even more, things should be ok. Let’s get to it.

Joey and Joel do the intros with Gertner ripping into Cyrus with nothing special.

Opening sequence.

Joey brings out TV Champion Super Crazy and we get the same video from last week on how he won the title at Living Dangerously. Crazy says something in Spanish and here’s his first opponent: Tajiri. Before the match can start here’s Cyrus to say he’s the boss so this is a Japanese death match, which I think means anything goes. Joel goes after Cyrus but is threatened with being arrested and fired. Cyrus shoves Joey as well so Styles takes off his jacket, only to be met with the same threats. If Joey hits him, the show is off the network and will go back to the stone age. Joey backs down and Cyrus gets to stand tall.

TV Title: Super Crazy vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri

The match starts after a break with Crazy being whipped into the barricade. Back inside and Tajiri hits a hard kick to the head and the handspring elbow but Crazy dropkicks him back to the floor. An Asai Moonsault into the crowd takes Tajiri down again before getting two off a moonsault press back in the ring. Crazy pounds away with right hands in the corner but Tajiri comes back with a quick victory roll for two and a HARD kick to the head puts Crazy down.

That’s too much wrestling though so here’s a chair, only to have Crazy dropkick it back into Tajiri’s face. Tajiri comes back with a chair to the Crazy’s head and an even bigger one puts the champion down again as we take a quick break. Back with Tajiri tossing in a table as Crazy is busted wide open. A top rope double stomp puts Crazy through the table for two so Tajiri brings in another table. Crazy comes back with a powerslam through the table and slides in a third because why have two when you can have three. A moonsault doesn’t put Tajiri through the table so Crazy powerbombs him through it for the pin.

Rating: D+. How exactly was this different from any run of the mill ECW match? The Japanese death part of the match was just a bunch of table spots which you can see anytime around here, which is the problem with having a hardcore company: it takes away from the shock value of it when the match is supposed to be something special.

Post match Corino, Victory and Rhyno come in to destroy Crazy until Sandman makes a three minute entrance for the save. As is always the case, the heels just stand there while Sandman drinks in the crowd. Tajiri hits the mist on Sandman, allowing Rhyno to Gore him down. Sandman and Rhyno both get piledrivers.

Back from a break and the Network is still in the ring with Cyrus saying no one can stop them. If anyone wants to fight them, come out here right now and do it. This brings out Balls Mahoney with his chair and the goons bail on Cyrus for some reason. He realizes he’s on his own but Corino saves him from death. The segment FINALLY ends after taking up literally over half of the show.

Earlier today Da Baldies beat up Tommy Dreamer in front of a Coke machine. Apparently Raven has put a bounty on Dreamer’s head.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Vic Grimes

Dreamer jumps Grimes on the floor and sends him into the post to draw early blood. They head into the aisle where a spotlight staring straight into the camera blinds us for a bit. The brawl goes into the crowd and I don’t think there was ever a bell. They fight into a penalty box as you can barely see a thing in this mess. Back to ringside and Dreamer hits him in the back with a chair but Grimes hits a powerslam on the floor to take over.

Now they head to the back of the arena for more walking around with the occasional punching called brawling. Grimes gets on top of a scaffolding and drops an elbow onto Dreamer on the concrete. Da Baldies carry Dreamer back to ringside and crotch him on the barricade. Back inside and a top rope splash is only good for two because the people in ECW won’t get pinned if they get their heads cut off while wild horses attached to their limbs run off in all four directions.

Back to the floor with Dreamer sat in a chair so all of Da Baldies can pound on him. Grimes tries a running flip dive but lands on the apron before falling on the empty chair. Dreamer pulls out a ladder for no apparent reason before tying Angel (another Baldie) up in the Tree of Woe. Dreamer catapults the ladder into the Baldies’ faces and drops them with a double DDT. Grimes is dragged back into the crowd and placed on a table so Dreamer can drop an elbow of his own. Back in the ring and Grimes blocks a DDT but misses a Swanton onto the ladder, giving Dreamer the pin.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t wrestling of any sort at all. It was a bunch of messy spots with a few wrestling moves thrown in for fun. This is the kind of nonsense that just keeps going and going while eating up the limited television time they have. The Raven vs. Dreamer stuff was played out three years ago but it’s all the GENIUS Heyman can come up with.

The yet to be named Sinister Minister is in the ring and says that he came up with the idea to pair up Raven and Awesome. Oh yeah that’s a thing. I had forgotten they were a pairing until now. Francine is in the ring with him but he berates her for a bit before handing her the mic. She brags about all the success she’s had in ECW and doesn’t like him taking credit for her success. Francine claims she’s behind Awesome and Raven, so here are the Impact Players to stare down Awesome and Raven as the show ends.

Overall Rating: D. That’s on the ECW sliding scale. This was a tricky episode to grade because they did have stories going on, but the stories either aren’t interesting or are just being teased instead of actually going anywhere. The wrestling was bogged down by more hardcore nonsense, which is going to cost them in the long run. It’s fine to have once in awhile but when that’s all you have, the effect is gone in a hurry.

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ECW on TNN
Date: March 3, 2000
Location: The Rave, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Attendance: 2,250
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

This show has to be better that last week’s. Literally, it’s not possible to produce a show worse than last week’s so soon thereafter. We still don’t have anything announced for the PPV which is in nine days. Odds are there will be a tournament of some sort for the TV Title at the show but since nothing has been announced yet, it’s hard to say. Let’s get to it.

Mike Awesome says it’s personal between him and Spike Dudley.

Theme song.

ECW World Title: Spike Dudley vs. Mike Awesome

Spike jumps Mike with a chair but goes after Judge Jeff Jones, allowing Awesome to crush Spike’s head with a chair. More chair shots to the head follow and Dudley is busted open. Mike has a table set up on the floor but Spike rakes the eyes to escape a gorilla press slam. Dudley rains down right hands in the corner but charges into an elbow to put him back down. Now Spike is launched over the top and through the table….as we go to a PPV ad.

Back with Spike bulldogging Awesome through a table off the stage and the Acid Drop gets two on the ring with Jones breaking up the pin. Awesome breaks up another Acid Drop attempt and hits a wicked release German suplex to lay Spike out. Three BIG powerbombs kill Spike but he raises his shoulder to tick Awesome off again. A table is set up in the corner and a running powerbomb through the table finally ends Spike.

Rating: D+. Ok now can we get someone other than Spike or Tanaka for Awesome to defend the title against? This pairing has been done to death and we’ve got the idea down pretty clearly already. The match was the same as it always is: Spike tries hard but gets destroyed by power in the end. Somehow this was the best match in two weeks on the show.

Masato Tanaka rants in Japanese when Dawn Marie comes in to tell him to shut up. He yells at her and the Impact Players come in to lay him out.

Joel’s limerick is cut off again.

Steve Corino is in the ring to talk about something. Erik Watts, one of the most worthless wrestlers of all time, is his opponent tonight and has a belt of some sort with him, which apparently is the old Mid-South Heavyweight Title. Sure why not. Corino talks about how the two of them are a lot alike in their old school beliefs such as hating tables and chairs. He doesn’t want to bleed for these losers in Milwaukee and the fans aren’t pleased. Corino talks about how things were in the old days and insults Dusty Rhodes a bit. Tonight it’s a Texas bullrope match to keep it old school.

Steve Corino vs. Erik Watts

It’s the four corners variety but we’re still not ready because Corino has more cheap heat jokes. He talks about how the Crusher (the Man Who Made Milwaukee Famous) was a closet homosexual and a sexual deviant (Joel: “That’s a bad thing?). The referee (future indy guy H.C. Loc) says he’s from Milwaukee and insults Corino, leading to a big beatdown from Watts, Jack Victory and Corino.

The fans chant for Dusty but Corino says he retired Dusty last week (two weeks ago sport). However, Corino wants Dusty to come out of retirement for a bullrope match because Dusty is the reason Jim Crockett went out business, the reason the WWF almost went out of business in 1989 (not really) and the man who cut the brake lines on Magnum T.A.’s car.

Super Crazy vs. Tajiri vs. Little Guido

Elimination rules. Guido is knocked to the floor to start, allowing Crazy and Tajiri to fly around the mat for a bit as only they can do. Crazy goes to the floor as Guido comes back in for a kick from Tajiri. Guido takes Tajiri down into a Fujiwara Armbar as Crazy is down from something the camera missed. Guido chops Tajiri and double teams him along with Crazy.

Tajiri comes back with a kick to Crazy’s head and goes outside with Guido. Crazy busts out an Asai Moonsault to take both guys down and lands on his feet just to show off. Big Sal misses a splash on Crazy against the barricade, allowing Crazy to dive onto the big fat guy. So it’s Crazy alone in the ring until Tajiri comes back in for the Tarantula. Guido makes the save before catching Crazy in a kind of reverse powerbomb out of the corner for two.

Tajiri’s handspring elbow is countered into a Russian legsweep from Guido, only to have Crazy take him down with a running DDT for two. Tajiri brainbusters Guido for the elimination to get us down to one on one. Crazy kicks him out to the floor but misses the Asai Moonsault, allowing Tajiri to kick him in the jaw. Back in and the handspring elbow connects on Crazy but he no sells a low dropkick to the face. Because, you know, being kicked in the face doesn’t hurt or anything. Crazy hits a jumping Tajiri low (that came out of nowhere) and a top rope Lionsault gets the pin on Tajiri.

Rating: C. See, this is what ECW needs to do more often: throw talented guys out there and let them show off. There were no weapons used in this and the fans still seemed to like it. Yeah Sal interfered but that’s minor by comparison to what usually happens on this show. The match wasn’t great or anything but it was easy to sit through and by comparison to the drek I’ve been sitting through, it was a masterpiece.

House show ads.

Cyrus complains that the three way dance was a ratings killer so he has Rhyno Gore Crazy through a locker.

We get a clip from Hardcore TV of Francine coming out to face Dreamer after Dreamer apologized for DDTing her last week. She takes a sharp turn by saying people are here to see her topless rather than to see Dreamer fighting. Dreamer isn’t good enough to survive without her because she got him over in ECW. He never did anything without her and what about Raven Tommy, what about Raven? The difference is Dreamer needs her, but Raven wants her. Dreamer tells her to get out and loads up a piledriver but Raven makes the save with the DDT.

With Dreamer down, here are the Impact Players to pick the bones. Justin superkicks him down and they load up the spike tombstone but Masato Tanaka comes out for the save…..and to start a match?

Tag Titles: Masato Tanaka/Tommy Dreamer vs. Impact Players

And it’s a title match? Sure why not. The challengers clean house to start and they head into the crowd for the brawl. Storm throws Dreamer down some stairs and dives onto his body as Credible and Tanaka fight into the concourse. Dreamer and Storm head back inside with Lance getting crotched on the top rope so Dreamer can stand on his groin.

A baseball slide sends a chair into Storm’s face but Justin interferes, allowing Storm to superkick Dreamer down for two. Here’s the required table and Dreamer counters a suplex into the Death Valley Driver through the table. Everyone is inside again and Tanaka hits a quick Diamond Dust for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. Well that happened. Seriously, that’s about all I’ve got on this one. The match was literally thrown toge…..wait a minute. Tanaka was attacked by the Players on the ECW on TNN show, but he teamed up with Dreamer on TNN, which showed a flashback to him winning the titles on Hardcore TV? The Players had the titles when they attacked Tanaka, so we had a flashback to a match that took place before the events that set it up. This show is done in a few months and it’s pretty clear why.

Overall Rating: C-. Defying the laws of time and space, this was one of the better shows they’ve had in awhile. At least they had some decent matches on this episode instead of the mindless brawling we had to sit through last week. It’s still not a good show and we still have nothing concrete for the PPV, but there’s one full show left for them to turn it all around right?

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ECW on TNN
Date: January 14, 2000
Location: Center Stage Theater, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 780
Commentator: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

We’re past Guilty as Charged and it’s another two months before the next PPV with Living Dangerously. The major change is that the Impact Players finally won the titles which they should have gotten months ago. Other than that, it’s your usual ECW PPV: it’s hit or miss and if you missed it, you’re probably going to be fine. This was taped before the PPV though so don’t expect any results to be revealed to the live crowd. Let’s get to it.

Joel and Joey are in the ring to open things up. Joel does his usual filthy intro but Cyrus cuts him off of course. Cyrus talks about how unfair it is for Gertner to use this time to “get himself over” and how there’s an executive decree that says he can’t do so anymore. Also there is to be NO sexual innuendo or smart remarks towards country/western music. This includes Dukes of Hazard jokes, inbreeding or negative remarks about Rollerjam. I actually liked that show. Cyrus announces a new TNN show called Rock-N-Bowl and the fans literally groan.

Opening sequence.

We get some clips of Awesome vs. Spike on Sunday.

Joel rants about Cyrus a bit.

Super Crazy vs. Little Guido

Guido immediately takes it to the mat and pounds on Crazy’s ears a bit. The fans want pizza. Big Sal distracts Crazy and Guido takes over again. There’s a Fujiwara Armbar which doesn’t last long at all. Guido sends him to the floor for a dive but hits Sal instead. Since Sal weighs about 600lbs, that doesn’t make much of a difference. Crazy dives on both of them and we take a break.

Back with Guido in control via a top rope clothesline. Crazy is sent into the barricade by Sal which gets two and it’s back to the armbar. The problem here is that between these two and Tajiri, there’s almost nothing they haven’t shown us yet. Crazy grabs a quick rollup for two and a baseball slide takes Crazy out. There are ten punches in the corner but Guido counters with a reverse powerbomb out of the corner. Crazy DDT’s Crazy on a chair (see how little selling you get here?) for two. Sal misses a splash which gets the same on Guido, but a spinning DDT gets the pin for Crazy.

Rating: D+. You know, for as much praise as you hear these matches get, they’re really pure spot fests. Even the WCW cruiserweight matches are better wrestling matches than this. The chair stuff was actually annoying because it goes completely against what the match was supposed to be and doesn’t add anything because it didn’t even get the pin. Nothing to see here as usual but it’s still likely going to be the best match of the night.

House show/website ads.

On Sunday, Fonzie said that Sabu would walk out if he lost to RVD. That happened, but we’re not sure what walk out means apparently.

We get a minute long version of what I just said.

RVD brags about winning.

From what I can find, Sabu actually did leave soon after this because he didn’t want to put over Super Crazy.

We get another recap of Steve Corino’s crew beating up Jerry Lynn and then Dusty Rhodes when the Dream made the save. I don’t remember Dusty being advertised or being in ECW before this so that’s quite a surprise. The locker room then saved the fat man. Rhyno did most of the beating and said he wanted the world title.

Apparently Dusty is going to be at the TV Tapings for the January 28^th show where he can pick whoever he wants as a partner to face Corino.

Da Baldies want to fight New Jack. Again.

Call the hotline!

Buy these tapes!

We get another clip from Awesome Spike.

Jerry Lynn vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri

Tajiri jumps Jerry during the entrance and we start fast. Jerry comes back with a headscissors to send Tajiri to the floor and adds a plancha. Tajiri rams Jerry into various objects on the floor as Joel goes into a weird rant about how evil people from Minnesota are. Back in and Tajiri stomps away in the corner and hooks the Tarantula. Jerry gets put in the Tree of Woe and there’s the baseball slide before Tajiri stands on Jerry’s balls.

Tajiri misses a big spin kick and Lynn hooks a rana followed by a sitout powerbomb to counter Tajiri’s attempt at a rana of his own. A German suplex gets two on Lynn and a tornado DDT gets the same on Tajiri. Joel: “Lynn is being culturally insensitive. They don’t have tornadoes in Japan.” A BIG kick to the head puts Lynn down and a second does the same for two. In a lame ending, Lynn goes low before hitting the cradle piledriver for the pin.

Rating: B-. For ECW, this was a near masterpiece. The ending was the right idea if they’re going for a Lynn heel turn which may have been where this was going. Anyway, this is one of those good matches you hear about in ECW with selling and everything. That’s all you can ask for out of shows like these so this was fine.

Same ads as earlier.

A clip of a catfight ends the show. Seriously that’s all they’ve got. Oh and the tag titles changed. The Impact Players brag a bit too. Storm: “Do you know how hard it is to get a strap off a guy from Calgary? Just ask Vince McMahon.”

Overall Rating: D. I get that they taped this before the PPV so they couldn’t give stuff away, but man this show sucked even with that being factored in. There are about eight and a half months of this show and you can see why it was canceled: it’s just not that good no matter how you look at it. The second match wasn’t bad at all though.

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