Wrestler of the Day – August 6: Petey Williams

Today is a guy with one heck of a finisher: Petey Williams.

Petey would be in the first match ever on Impact, from June 4, 2004.

Team Canada vs. Amazing Red/Sonjay Dutt/Hector Garza

Team Canada is Petey Williams, Eric Young and Bobby Roode. Another very different idea from this point is the time limit on screen. Non-title matches only have ten minute time limits and title matches get thirty minutes. If the match goes to a time limit draw, a judge will decide the winner. The Canadians all bail to the floor to start and there’s the triple dive. We start in the ring with Eric Young (with BIG bushy hair) getting beaten up by Amazing Red until the Canadians take Eric out.

Roode pounds away on Red as the power member of the Canadians, getting two off an elbow. There’s also an ESPN style bottom line, running down results of recent TNA PPVs. Petey gets two off a middle rope bulldog and Coach Scott D’Amore gets in a cheap shot of his own. Back to Roode for a nice suplex before knocking Dutt and Garza out to the floor.

Red comes back with a simultaneous headscissors to Roode and DDT to Young, allowing for the hot tag to Garza. Roode takes him down with a tilt-a-whirl powerbomb as everything breaks down. Red gets two on Roode off a springboard hurricanrana but Petey snaps off the Canadian Destroyer to take Red out. Roode’s Razor’s Edge is countered into a hurricanrana by Dutt, setting up a corkscrew moonsault from Dutt for the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine for an opener with most of the guys busting out all of their dives. It’s the standard formula of throwing some fast paced guys out there to open up a show and it still works as well as anything else. It’s always fun to see how big starts like Roode got their starts as he looked good here.

He would win the X-Division Title soon after this and defend it at the first three hour PPV, Victory Road 2004.

X-Division Title: Petey Williams vs. AJ Styles

AJ was a huge star almost at this point but he was still the king of the midcard as he would be for a long time to come, as in like 5 years. These two just go freaking nuts like an old school cruiserweight match. AJ hits a perfect backflip off the apron to the floor and then a senton over the top rope to the floor. Petey takes over with a jawbreaker and we get down to a bit more of a standard match to set up AJ’s big comeback.

For a crowd the all loves AJ that’s a heck of a dueling chant they have going. Ok that was cool. Petey puts AJ in the Tree of Woe and stands on his crotch. He does it again and AJ does more or less a really bit sit up and grabs AJ to pull him back in a German suplex which he follows with a Pele. I LOVE that springboard forearm. It just looks awesome as all goodness.

Both guys counter each other’s finisher and then AJ just chucks Petey into the corner. That’s one way to do it I guess. AJ has the pin but the fat Canadian coach interrupts it. AJ kicks out of a belt shot so at least the match should be ok for the ending as that would have killed it for me. After more interference, we get the awesome finish as Petey hits the Canadian Destroyer, which is just completely awesome. It’s a jumping flip piledriver. In other words he’s got him in a regular piledriver but jumps forward and does a full flip before hitting it. That’s just amazing on a lot of levels.

Rating: B. This was very fun but AJ should have gone over here. I mean it’s your biggest show and your top face for the most part goes over to a generic guy with a cool finisher. That just doesn’t make sense to me, but it’s TNA so why am I surprised? Fun match though.

Petey would team up with various members of Team Canada, including at Hard Justice 2005.

Team Canada vs. Apollo/Sonny Siaki

Apollo is a Puerto Rican guy I think. This is Williams/Young instead of Roode/Young. Siaki is a Samoan but not related to the famous Samoan family. The Canadians jump them to start but get knocked to the floor just as fast. We officially start with Apollo vs. Williams. Off to Siaki quickly who speeds things up. Neckbreaker gets two on Young. The non-Canadians hit one of the biggest backdrops I’ve ever seen on Young.

D’Amore screams at the announcers about something. That distracts Apollo and the Canadians take over. Elbow gets two for Young. Apollo manages to get in a knee lift which is enough to bring in both Siaki and Williams. Powerslam gets two on Williams. D’Amore hooks the foot of Siaki on a suplex attempt but it only gets two. Apollo spears Young down but he gets caught in a pretty awful looking top rope rana by Williams. With everything falling apart, A-1 (another Canadian) runs in and Jackhammers Siaki so Williams can steal the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine for an opener but the match itself was nothing of note. Apollo and Siaki both looked great but they didn’t have much going for them other than that. Apollo went back to Puerto Rico soon and was a much bigger deal. Siaki wasn’t around much longer, at least not in anything important.

What would a TNA wrestler be without an Ultimate X match?

Petey Williams vs. Chris Sabin vs. Matt Bentley

Ultimate X, #1 contender’s match. Petey goes up but Sabin pulls him down and the faces (I think?) beat on him a bit. Williams counters a suplex from Sabin into one of his own but Bentley comes in with a kick to slow Petey down again. Wheelbarrow suplex puts Williams down again and Bentley goes up. Petey takes Matt down again but Traci’s (Bentley’s chick) rack distracts him. Matt goes up but Sabin pulls him down.

It’s Sabin vs. Bentley at the moment while D’Amore coaches Williams. Sabin picks Williams up and puts him in Razor’s Edge position, throwing him at Bentley in the corner. Sabin tries to climb but barely gets started before Bentley makes the save. We’re way too early in the match for a potential win anyway. Petey sends Bentley to the floor and hits a SWEET slingshot rana to put him down even further.

Everyone is back in now and Bentley hits a neckbreaker on Sabin and a cutter on Williams at the same time. Matt goes climbing but Sabin follows him and hooks a powerbomb to take both guys down in a painful looking move. Sabin gets caught in the Tree of Woe so Petey sings O Canada. Bentley pops up and dropkicks him off and out to the floor before going up. Sabin gets out of the Tree and shoves him down, before diving on both guys when the X was there for the grabbing because Sabin is an idiot.

Sabin goes up and Bentley dives at him with a shoulder block. That knocks Sabin down, but it knocks the X down as well. We more or less stop the match so that the crew can put the X up again with a ladder. The fans chant USE THE LADDER. Sabin and Bentley go up for the X but knock each other off. The X falls and Petey catches it, so TNA says screw the rules, Williams wins.

Rating: D+. The match was good, but there’s really no excuse for the ending. Put it up there again and have someone get it immediately or whatever, but COME ON. This was just freaking stupid and it makes the company look inept because they can’t get their own signature match right. Invest in some better tape guys.

Petey would compete in the World X Cup in 2006, including this match at Sacrifice 2006.

World X Cup Second Round: Jushin Thunder Liger vs. Petey Williams

Actually this is worth three points. Petey takes him to the mat and the fans are all over him. To be fair he’s fighting a legend so it’s understandable. I think they botch an elbow drop spot as Liger dropped the elbow but Williams took over anyway. A headscissors puts Liger to the apron but he low bridges Williams to the floor. Liger adds a huge dive to take over again.

Team Japan acts all evil and pounds on Petey on the floor. Back into the ring and Liger hooks the surfboard which is one of his signature holds. He drops Petey down into a dragon sleeper and now the annoying fans have to do the dueling chants. A frog splash by Liger hits knees and Petey hits a spinwheel kick to put Liger down again.

Liger tries a palm thrust but walks into an enziguri and tornado DDT for two. Petey loads up the Destroyer but Jushin comes back with a palm thrust and the Liger Bomb for two. A member of Team Japan interferes with a low blow. Liger follows with the Crash Thunder Buster (wheelbarrow facejam) for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was pretty good and a solid choice for an opener. Liger is one of the few guys from Japan that people actually know a bit here in America so his appearances are actually worth something. Having people go out there and just saying they’re from Japan or Mexico or wherever doesn’t really mean anything. Liger could still go in his late 30s or early 40s so this worked pretty well.

Petey challenged for the X-Division Title again at Hard Justice 2006.

X-Division Title: Senshi vs. Jay Lethal vs. Petey Williams

Williams knocks Lethal to the floor and follows him out with a rana off the apron. Senshi dives out to the floor, takes out both guys and lands on his feet. It’s Lethal vs. Senshi at the moment. Williams comes back in and walks into a Liger Kick from Senshi. Lethal back up now but he misses a moonsault out of the corner. Senshi shoves Lethal into Williams and Williams kicks Lethal down.

Petey puts Lethal in the Tree of Woe and does the O Canada spot. Senshi kicks Williams down and loads up the Warrior’s Way but Lethal comes back in for the save. Lethal’s superplex is broken up and Senshi dives onto Williams. Lethal stays up there and dropkicks both guys down, drawing a Lethal chant from the crowd. Both guys are slammed by Jay and he hits stereo low dropkicks to the face.

Lethal’s slide through Senshi’s legs for a sunset flip attempt is broken up by a kick and they all try to roll each other up. Jay gutwrench suplexes Senshi down but gets caught in a Sharpshooter by Williams. Senshi breaks that up with a kick to Petey for two but gets caught in a release German for two from Lethal. Swan Dive to Petey misses and there’s the Canadian Destroyer to Lethal. Senshi kicks Williams down and pins Lethal to retain.

Rating: B-. Another good three way here as they had some great counters in there at the end. Senshi was a guy that I’ve always found uninteresting and Williams only had one move and Lethal was pretty dull without the Savage stuff, but they combined for a decent match here. I think Sabin would take the title off Senshi.

In 2007, Bobby Roode would feud with Eric Young. This led to Eric getting a friend helping him out, which would wind up being Petey. From Lockdown 2007.

Petey Williams vs. Robert Roode

Roode is the rich dude still. Young is with Roode and gets yelled at before the match. Petey hammers away to start and controls early with speed and stomping. Springboard Codebreaker gets two. Williams does the Tree of Woe spot where he stands on Roode’s balls and sings O Canada. Roode manages to send him into the buckle to shift momentum and I remember why I never wanted to see him get a singles push.

Roode is just totally uninteresting at this point. If you think he’s boring now, today’s Roode has NOTHING on 07 Roode. A SICK clothesline puts Williams down and Eric is just kind of sitting there and doesn’t like what he’s seeing. Middle rope kneedrop gets two. Off to the chinlock. Petey makes a comeback and tries a crucifix for two but he eats cage to break that up. I don’t remember anyone else going into the cage all night until then.

Rock Bottom gets two. Brooks tries to send in a hockey stick but Young makes the save. Williams hits something that we miss as Brooks and Eric are fighting outside. Williams hits a rana back inside as the camera is from above the cage for some reason. The camera goes back to Young so AGAIN we miss whatever Petey uses for two. A dropkick doesn’t hit Roode but he goes into the corner anyway.

Despite that PAINFUL missing dropkick, Roode hits a spinebuster for two. The Canadian sitcom on the floor continues as Roode demands the hockey stick, but Petey hits a cool DDT for two. Now Petey asks for the stick and a few shots with it take Roode down. And Hebner intercepts it because we can’t have weapons in a cage or something. Rollup gets two for Williams. Destroyer is countered and the Payoff (PerfectPlex) ends this.

Rating: C. I kind of liked this actually. Young was wildly popular at this point which shows you how bad Roode was, considering even he couldn’t get over with Young out there. Roode was just so boring and uninteresting that he needed Beer Money or he would have had nothing else to do.

Petey would start copying Scott Steiner, becoming known as Maple Leaf Muscle. Here’s one of their showdowns at Against All Odds 2008.

Petey Williams vs. Scott Steiner

Petey likes to copy Scott which he was told not to do pre-match. They pose for a bit which is a bit more disturbing than it should be. Steiner easily overpowers him of course so Petey tries to speed things up a bit which doesn’t work either. Some strikes work a bit for Petey but it’s hard to fight against a big overhead belly to belly. Elbow and pushups follow.

Another belly to belly off the top gets two but Steiner pulls him up. Steiner gets an Angle Slam off the top but again pulls Williams up. He goes to the floor and gets the two cases, wedging them between the ropes as you often see done with chairs. The referee stops him but Williams manages to shove Steiner into the case. Rana takes Steiner down for two. Canadian Destroyer is countered into an Alabama Slam for a long two.

Steiner Recliner can’t get on though as Williams rolls him up instead for two. Williams hits a dropkick and a slingshot Codebreaker to set up a top rope crossbody for two. Williams puts on the Steiner Recliner which is as miserable of a chinlock as I’ve ever seen. Tornado DDT gets two for Williams. Steiner gets sent into the other case and a missile dropkick puts down Steiner. Rhaka Khan debuts and distracts Petey so that a Last Ride can end Petey.

Rating: C-. Better match than you would expect but Steiner was never in any real danger here. I never got the appeal of mini Steiner in the form of Williams. Steiner never really went anywhere until the Mafia came up. This was watchable but at the same time it wasn’t anything great at all.

Petey would cash in the X-Division case and win the title. Here’s a defense at Slammiversary 2008.

X-Division Title: Petey Williams vs. Kaz

Williams is champion and has Scott Steiner/Rhaka Khan with him. Petey also has a broken orbital bone so he’s in a mask. In a nice move, Kaz has on a wristlock and Petey tries to roll through it. Kaz grabs him into a rollup as he tries to for two. That looked good. They hit the mat into some pinfall reversals and Kan escapes the Destroyer attempt. Kaz gets a slingshot dropkick in the corner for no cover as Petey hits the floor.

Kaz fires off some kicks and the fans are split. They go to the floor and Khan distracts Kaz enough to let Petey get a tornado DDT off the apron to take over. Petey takes over but Kaz gets a sunset flip out of the corner for two. O’Connor Roll gets two and the kickout puts Kaz on the floor. Petey hits that SWEET slingshot rana to take over again. The fans are split again and it fires Kaz up a bit.

Petey works the arm as that comeback was pretty short lived. Kaz gets in a big kick and both guys are down. He fires off a bunch of strikes and hits a release spinebuster for two. Slingshot DDT gets the same. The fans say this is awesome and I’m not entirely sure I’d go that far. It’s good but not awesome. Williams speeds things up and the Canadian hits a Russian on the American.

He loads up the Destroyer but Kaz escapes. Petey hits a cool move that looks like a fisherman’s suplex but he slings backwards into a DDT instead. Kaz fights back and tries the Flux Capacitor (C4) off the top but Petey escapes that also. There’s very little selling in these matches at all. Another Destroyer attempt is countered into the Fade to Black for two.

Khan comes in so there’s an enziguri for you. The distraction lets Scott slide in the pipe (that’s what she said?) and Petey kills him with it. Kaz is busted but he kicks out. Destroyer attempt #8 is countered into a rollup which is countered into the Sharpshooter but Kaz counters into the Wave of the Future (spinning downward spiral) for two. The referee JUMPED over them to get there and got to three before Williams kicked out but who cares about that? Steiner distracts Kaz and it’s enough for Petey to hook the Destroyer and we’re done.

Rating: B-. Good opener here with both guys looking good. Kaz was getting a world title shot on Thursday so this was a bit worthless by comparison. Obviously he would lose there but that’s another story. This was fast paced but the lack of selling started to show in the middle as nothing could keep someone down for more than ten seconds.

One more Steiner vs. Petey match after they’ve split. From Against All Odds 2009.

Scott Steiner vs. Petey Williams

Steiner shoves him around to start. Time for some arm work as Petey is in trouble. Petey tries to speed things up and hits a missile dropkick for two. He goes up again but gets caught in a belly to belly off the middle rope. Clothesline and elbow set up the pushups. Williams can’t get a tornado DDT as Scott keeps the advantage. Petey gets draped over the top rope and Scott gets an elevated Downward Spiral for two.

Williams gets a boot up in the corner to slow things down a bit and they slug it out. They go up top and Petey is able to knock him off and hit a cross body. There’s the tornado DDT but it’s not very good. Steiner is finally like enough of this and counters a Canadian Destroyer attempt. Petey settles for an enziguri instead to set up a slingshot Codebreaker to put Scott down again.

The fans are split here, proving that faces and heel mean nothing to these idiots called Impact Zone fans. Petey grabs a rollup for two. Dropkick puts Scott on the floor but a slingshot rana is caught in a powerbomb to the floor. Steiner Recliner goes on and Williams is able to get to the ropes. Yes, the move that choked out everything in sight in WCW is broken up by Petey freaking Williams here. We actually get the Steiner Screwdriver here to end it. That move is SICK.

Rating: C. Not bad here but Petey’s offense was a lot like what a jobber would use. This wasn’t a squash but it was getting close to one at points. The Screwdriver (kind of at least. This was more like a Piledriver) is always a nice touch since it’s only used once every few years. Not much here, but nothing great at all.

Petey would make the occasional appearance in ROH, including this one at Bitter Friends Stiffer Enemies II.

Rhett Titus vs. Petey Williams

He’s Addicted to Love Rhett Titus mind you, which mainly means he has some hilarious named for his moves. They make dick jokes to start us off and I’m fearing a comedy match here. Williams hooks a reverse figure four which was a nice hold there. And now let’s talk about Chris Hero. Ok then.

We get a nice wrestling sequence and then a long spot calling thing. This has been almost all counters and rest holds. So after the last match was almost all strikes, this one has almost none. Got it. The announcers are getting on my nerves. There goes the bowtie! I have no idea what that means but I’m going to make it seem like it’s a big deal by ending it with an exclamation point!

Titus is dominating here, which wasn’t the case at Apocalypse but there we are. Do we really need all these annoying jokes from the announcers? Yeah I’m thinking no on that one. This match just isn’t interesting me at all. It’s not particularly bad but it’s just not interesting at all. Williams has Titus set for a Sharpshooter and turns around and just stops so Titus can roll him up.

What the heck was that supposed to be? The Sharpshooter goes on and it means nothing at all. We hit the floor as Williams hits a rana over the top. Titus hits a Fameasser and then a top rope knee drop for two. Williams goes for the Canadian Destroyer and gets caught in a backdrop and the feet on the ropes end it. Post match Williams goes for the Destroyer again but Titus gets out of it.

Rating: D+. This just didn’t do it for me at all. It’s not bad or anything, but it’s just not that impressive. It felt like a match that belonged far earlier in the card and this one just didn’t work for me. Like I said it’s not bad, but it’s just not something I had any interest in watching at all.

Here’s a match from February 19, 2011 in a promotion I’d actually like to check out in more detail at some point: Lucha Libre USA.

Petey Williams vs. L.A. Park

Williams is in a heel stable called The Right and they use a six sided ring. Petey hammers away to start and drops him with a big right hand. A headscissors puts Park down and a middle rope hurricanrana sends him to the floor. Williams nails a nice suicide dive but both guys are a bit staggered. Back in and they take a good while to call a spot for some reason before Park avoids a series of shots in the corner.

Park grabs the referee for no apparent reason and throws him into a sunset flip on Williams with a fast three count. The referee celebrates because he’s an imbecile before Park grabs a powerslam for a real near fall. Petey gets the same off a DDT and a Downward Spiral as they’re just going from move to move here. Park kicks at the legs and nails a Backstabber but Petey grabs the rope. Now it’s Williams getting knocked outside so Park can hit a dive of his own. Park superplexes him back in but Williams is up at two. Back up and Park hits a reverse DDT into a clothesline for the pin.

Rating: D. The match was longer than it needed to be and I was getting bored by the end. There isn’t anything to it for the most part as everything was spot after spot, which doesn’t make for an entertaining match most of the time. This was part of the Right vs. the rest of the company, meaning some promos would have made this a lot more interesting.

Petey would come back to TNA for One Night Only: X-Travaganza in 2013.

Rashad Cameron/Anthony Nese vs. Kid Kash/Douglas Williams

Williams and Cameron start things off with Doug looking older than usual. Doug takes him down by the leg and puts on a kind of reverse Boston Crab where Kash can kick Cameron in the face. Cameron and Williams run the ropes a bit until Rashad dropkicks Doug down. Off to Kash as this could be a trainwreck in a hurry. Thankfully Nese comes in quickly and things speed WAY up as they trade controlling holds on the mat. We get some sweet chain wrestling until Kash takes over with knees and chops.

Nese comes out of the corner with a spinning cross body for two and a clothesline to send Kash to the floor. Anthony loads up a dive, only to be taken down by Williams. Doug heads to the floor with Kash and there’s a big dive by Cameron, followed by an even better one by Nese. Back in and Nese jumps into a forearm from Kash as Taz is talking about investment banking and area codes.

Williams knocks Cameron off the apron as the old guys take over on Nese. Kash comes in for some solid stomping before it’s back to Williams. The old guys do some old school double teaming on Cameron who has no idea how to deal with it. Kash and Earl Hebner get into it a bit in the corner before Kash hits a hard chop on Cameron. Back to Williams for a kick to the back and a nice snap suplex for no cover.

Kash comes in to work on the knee in a vain attempt to add some psychology here. Some hard kicks by Kash to the chest keep Cameron down as Taz starts talking about Aces and 8’s. Well we made it through forty minutes so it was bound to happen soon. Kash breaks up a quick comeback with a forearm but his moonsault hits knees. Hot (I think?) tag brings in Nese as things speed up again.

Back to Williams who misses a clothesline and gets kicked down by Nese. A nice pumphandle powerbomb gets two for Anthony as everything breaks down. Nese hits a running knee to Williams’ head for two as Rashad dives on Kash on the floor. A quick rollup gets two for Anthony but he gets caught in the Rolling Chaos Theory for the pin by Williams.

Rating: C-. This didn’t work for me. I’m not a fan of most of the guys in this match and the ending was just kind of there. That’s one of the major problems with this show: there aren’t going to be any in depth stories and barely any stories at all. That’s fine if the matches are really good, but this was only decent at best.

Petey would come back to TNA on a semi-regular basis in 2013, including this match on Impact, April 4, 2013.

Petey Williams vs. Sonjay Dutt vs. Mason Andrews

Winner gets a title shot, presumably next week. Everyone starts with fast near falls until Andrews has to back away from a potential double team. A quick dropkick gets two on Williams for Dutt but Petey comes back with a suicide dive to take out Andrews. Dutt joins them on the floor and it’s Andrews taking over. Back inside and a backbreaker gets two on Williams but Andrews has to knock Dutt off the apron. A middle rope elbow gets two on Williams but Dutt is back in as well with an octopus hold on Petey.

Andrews breaks that up but can’t hit something out of a fireman’s carry on Williams. Dutt comes back in with a springboard dropkick to both guys at once. A kick in the corner puts Andrews on the ropes and there’s a springboard legdrop to the back of his head, followed by a springboard splash for two.

Petey is back in and decks Andrews but hits a Russian legsweep and short range Downward Spiral on Dutt. The Canadian Destroyer (flip piledriver) is broken up and Andrews hits a quick top rope rana on Williams. Dutt hits a standing Sliced Bred on Andrews but a top rope double stomp misses. The Destroyer hits Andrews to give Williams the shot at 5:19.

Rating: C+. Yeah it was fun, but this is the exact same thing we see from the X-Division every time: no story, the same stealing pin attempts, the same fast finishes. Yeah they’re flashy, but it gets really monotonous after awhile. But hey, EVERY MATCH IS A THREE WAY, so it has to be interesting right? I mean, why put effort into it when you can put a one size fits all sticker on there?

Petey would appear at Destination X 2013.

Homicide vs. Petey Williams vs. Sonjay Dutt

This is the first of three qualifying matches for an Ultimate X title match next week. Homicide sends both guys to the floor for a big dive before Petey takes over back inside. The slingshot Codebreaker takes Homicide down and Dutt is put in a leg lock, only to have Homicide come off the top with a headbutt to break it up.

Homicide takes both guys down and gets two on Dutt but Petey is back in. Dutt is crotched on the top but neither Homicide nor Petey can hit their finisher. Dutt suplexes Williams out of the corner and into the Gringo Killer but Dutt hits his standing sliced bread on Homicide. The moonsault double stomp is enough for Dutt to pin Homicide at 4:10.

Rating: C+. This was fine but it continues the same trend of all these three ways: every time I watch one I feel like a five year old leaving the dentist: it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be but it still wasn’t anything great. Homicide wouldn’t sell a thing other than the finisher, which is still awesome.

Another One Night Only, this time in the Tag Team Tournament.

Tag Team Tournament Play-In: Petey Williams/Sonjay Dutt vs. Generation Me

I can never remember which is Jeremy and which is Max. Then again I could never remember which Hardy was which at first so maybe they’re more comparable than I thought. Dutt starts with a headlock on let’s say Jeremy and gets a Let’s Go Senshi chant. Jeremy comes back with a Sin Cara armdrag out of the corner and a double seated dropkick puts Dutt down again. Sonjay tags in Petey to speed things up with a dropkick to Max’s back. Everything breaks down and the non-brothers are both knocked to the floor. A headscissors from Jeremy sends Sonjay into a Max dropkick for two in a nice double team.

It’s Dutt in trouble now as the crowd is trying to get into this. The Bucks work on the arm for a bit before Max hooks a chinlock. Sonjay fights up and tags in Petey to clean house again with a slingshot Codebreaker and a running knee to take the Bucks down. A spin into a Russian legsweep gets two on Max but Jeremy breaks up the Canadian Destroyer attempt. Sonjay comes back in with a springboard double dropkick for two as the cameraman is taken down.

Jeremy gets caught in the corner for some fast tagging by Williams and Dutt. Petey gets caught in a bulldog out of the corner and it’s hot tag to Max. Dutt gets taken down by a CM Punk running knee/bulldog out of the corner as everything breaks down. Jeremy dives through the ropes to take Petey down on the floor as Sonjay gets two off the standing Sliced Bread.

Petey comes back in for another Russian legsweep on Max but Jeremy superkicks him down. More Bang For Your Buck (fireman’s carry slam by Jeremy into a 450 by Max into a moonsault from Jeremy) gets two on Sonjay as Petey makes the save and hits the Canadian Destroyer on Max, only to have Jeremy kick Williams in the face for the pin.

Rating: C. Take four guys, let them do high spots on each other for eight minutes, listen to the crowd cheer for them. The match was nothing great but there were some nice high spots to wake the crowd up. Petey was the best guy out there as Sonjay looked slow and the Bucks were their usual sloppy selves.

We’ll wrap it up with X-Travaganza II.

Ultimate X Qualifying Match: Petey Williams vs. Tigre Uno

Only Williams can qualify. They trade arm work to start (of course) before Petey drives him into the corner. A bouncing hurricanrana takes Williams out to the floor and a big corkscrew dive puts him down again. Back in and Petey puts on a half crab before changing over to a Crossface and then the Rings of Saturn. That goes nowhere so Williams puts him in the Tree of Woe and stands on Tigre’s crotch to sing O Canada.

Tigre comes back with an enziguri, counters a German suplex and nails another enziguri for good measure. In a quick ending, Tigre goes up and tries what looks to be a seated senton splash but it turns into a low blow for the pin. Petey pops up and seems surprised by the ending and doesn’t sell the move.

Rating: D. You bring Petey Williams back and he doesn’t even try the one move that people remember him for? Tigre Uno is one of the few guys in the X-Division that can actually do anything and he gets to beat a single guy and then go home for the night? This concept continues to make less and less sense every match.

Petey Williams is a guy who took one move and turned it into a career. Yeah he could do some other stuff, but almost every match he has is just building up towards the piledriver. He was a really entertaining lackey to Scott Steiner and got over again as Maple Leaf Muscle. I’m not the biggest fan in the world but the guy really isn’t all that bad.

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Impact – June 4, 2004: Impact Debuts And Blows Away Today’s Product

Impact
Date: June 4, 2004
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

I found this online and had always wanted to do it so here you go. This is the debut episode of Impact, still coming from Orlando and on Fox Sports Net at I believe 3pm EST on Friday afternoons. TNA still hadn’t even had a three hour PPV yet and I doubt Victory Road had even been announced yet, meaning we’re still in the days of the weekly two hour PPVs. Jeff Jarrett is currently champion, having won the title just two days earlier. Let’s get to it.

They still have the six sided ring here.

Team Canada vs. Amazing Red/Sonjay Dutt/Hector Garza

Team Canada is Petey Williams, Eric Young and Bobby Roode. Another very different idea from this point is the time limit on screen. Non-title matches only have ten minute time limits and title matches get thirty minutes. If the match goes to a time limit draw, a judge will decide the winner. The Canadians all bail to the floor to start and there’s the triple dive. We start in the ring with Eric Young (with BIG bushy hair) getting beaten up by Amazing Red until the Canadians take Eric out.

Roode pounds away on Red as the power member of the Canadians, getting two off an elbow. There’s also an ESPN style bottom line, running down results of recent TNA PPVs. Petey gets two off a middle rope bulldog and Coach Scott D’Amore gets in a cheap shot of his own. Back to Roode for a nice suplex before knocking Dutt and Garza out to the floor.

Red comes back with a simultaneous headscissors to Roode and DDT to Young, allowing for the hot tag to Garza. Roode takes him down with a tilt-a-whirl powerbomb as everything breaks down. Red gets two on Roode off a springboard hurricanrana but Petey snaps off the Canadian Destroyer to take Red out. Roode’s Razor’s Edge is countered into a hurricanrana by Dutt, setting up a corkscrew moonsault from Dutt for the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine for an opener with most of the guys busting out all of their dives. It’s the standard formula of throwing some fast paced guys out there to open up a show and it still works as well as anything else. It’s always fun to see how big starts like Roode got their starts as he looked good here.

We recap Jarrett winning the title in the first King of the Mountain match.

Tenay and West talk about how awesome TNA is and introduce a highlight package from their first two years. This includes Toby Keith in TNA…and that’s it. Apparently more highlights are coming next week.

We run down the card for Wednesday’s show.

Shark Boy vs. Abyss

Sharky goes after Abyss and bites his way out of a chokeslam. A high cross body is caught in an easy slam before the Black Hole Slam ends this quick. Total squash for Abyss.

Popeye hugs Shark Boy. Yes the same Popeye you’re thinking of.

Tag Titles: America’s Most Wanted vs. Kid Kash/Dallas

AMW is challenging. The idea is Kash and Dallas have been ducking the only team they know can take the titles but tonight they’re out of places to run. The winners here have to defend against the winners of a fan poll next Wednesday night. Kash and Storm get us going with the Cowboy taking him down by the arm. Off to Harris for a clothesline and bulldog for two but Dallas makes the save.

Back to Storm who gets caught in a hot shot, allowing for the tag off to the big man Dallas. We take a break and come back with Storm superkicking Kash down, only to have Dallas make the save at two. Kash goes to the corner and climbs onto Kash’s shoulders but misses the moonsault, allowing for the hot tag off to Harris. A cross body and clothesline get two each on Dallas as everything breaks down. Dallas loads up Storm in a reverse Razor’s Edge before flipping him down onto his back for a frog splash from Kid but Harris spears Kash down. Dallas kicks Harris in the face but Storm rolls him up for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C+. Basic tag formula here with a title change to give the show some historical significance. AMW continues to be the best team ever in TNA as they have that chemistry that you only see in great teams. Kash and Dallas were just placeholder champions until AMW stopped their singles stuff over the last month or so.

Video on the World X Cup.

Here’s Dusty Rhodes who is acting as the judge in case matches go to the time limit. Dusty talks about tradition and drops names like Thesz, the Funks, the Briscos, AJ Styles and Ron Killings. Not quite the same level but nice idea. Now on to Jeff Jarrett, who slapped tradition in the face when he won the title back earlier this week. Cue Jarrett (West: “The thirty time NWA Champion!”) who says he used to look up to Dusty but that was twenty years ago when Dusty was in the twilight of his career.

If Dusty needs the $200, there are better ways to get it than standing here in Jarrett’s ring. Jeff speaks in cowboy terms, talking about how Dusty is John Wayne and Jeff will give him five paces to get out of Dodge. Dusty slaps him with the cowboy hat and beats on the champion, only to have Jeff come back and load up the guitar until Ron Killings makes the save. Jeff cracks the guitar over Killings’ head but BG James and Konnan make the real save with James swearing vengeance.

Video on the X-Division.

There’s a fourway match for a shot at Kazarian’s X Title. Vince Russo, director of authority, won’t say who the fourth man is.

Chris Sabin vs. Michael Shane vs. Elix Skipper vs. AJ Styles

Styles is a mystery man, revealed about twenty seconds after Russo wouldn’t reveal him. This is his first of about 85 returns to the X-Division. It’s a wild brawl to start as thankfully we don’t have tags in this. Shane and Styles are the only ones left in the ring and AJ does that sweet drop down into a dropkick spot, only to be taken down by a springboard missile dropkick from Sabin.

Skipper kicks Sabin down for two but Shane is back up with forearms. A wheelbarrow suplex puts Skipper down again as the fans are all over Shane. AJ pulls Michael out to the floor but gets suplexed down for his troubles. Skipper slams Sabin for two but gets caught in an Edgecution for two for Sabin. Chris escapes a rollup from AJ and gets two of his own off a springboard tornado DDT.

Shane is back in with a belly to belly on Sabin but gets crotched by AJ, allowing Elix to walk the ropes into a hurricanrana to send Michael to the floor. AJ sends Sabin to the floor and hits a big flip dive to take Skipper down as well. Shane loads up a superkick to Sabin, only to have AJ springboard in with a sunset flip, only to roll through into the Styles Clash for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C+. Nice insane X-Division match to show off what the X-Division was all about. Styles winning was pretty obvious but that doesn’t make it a bad thing. He’s one of those guys you have to showcase on the first TV show and they did a great job at it here. It’s also still weird to see Sabin as just another guy.

Kazarian comes out for the staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a solid show actually. They covered a wide variety of stories and parts of the company as well as building up for future shows. That’s a really good job for a debut show, but the fact that they had two years of material already helped them out a lot. Good stuff here though and much better than I was expecting.

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On This Day: September 11, 2005 – Unbreakable: TNA’s Greatest Moment

Unbreakable
Date: September 11, 2005
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 775
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

For those of you that keep track, this is the final TNA PPV that I haven’t done. The reason I chose this one for the last spot is the main event, which is universally considered the best TNA match of all time. Meltzer gave it five stars and I have yet to hear anyone say anything bad about it. The interesting thing is this is during the dark ages for the company, as they’re off TV here and wouldn’t get back on for another three weeks or so. Due to that and the main event, the rest of the show is almost totally forgotten. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is themed like an old school radio announcer and how TNA is the new national pastime. It runs down the main events, which also includes Raven vs. Rhyno for the title. That and the triple threat are the only matches mentioned. I liked this and the stupid idea was kind of cute.

3 Live Kru vs. Diamonds in the Rough

The Diamonds are Simon Diamond, Elix Skipper and David Young. After Konnan does his usual schtick, Elix and BG start things off. This was the same pairing that started off the match at the previous PPV I did. Elix uses his speed to control early but BG comes back with the same moveset he’s been using for years. Young tries to come in and gets double teamed by Killings and James. Back to Skipper and the Diamonds get in some triple team action on the former Road Dogg. Seriously, that’s what they call him quite a few times. BG escapes, hot tags Konnan, a shoe is thrown and the X-Factor pins Young. Seriously, that’s it.

Rating: D. What in the world was the point of this? It was like four minutes long and the match sucked. This was a horrible choice for an opener but I guess the fans are happy with the ending. The Diamonds were a really weak mini stable and I don’t think anyone ever cared about them in any way, shape or form. Really bad choice to start the show here.

We recap the preshow with Brown, Jarrett and Hardy all wanting the BFG title match. That would go to Kevin Nash on paper but Rhyno in reality.

Austin Aries vs. Roderick Strong

Aries takes him to the mat immediately as the fans chant about Generation Next. West explains that they’re stable mates in ROH as Strong takes over again. Aries (who looks really weird without his mustache) nips up and takes over again. A dropkick sets up a headlock on the mat for Aries as Austin is in control. Strong tries the Strong Hold but Aries spins out of it and we get a standoff.

Aries’ monkey flip is countered and Strong busts out the backbreakers. He throws Aries into the buckle for two and follows it up with a butterfly suplex for the same. Another backbreaker gets two and Strong stays on the back. He mixes it up by putting on a full nelson with his legs, only to get rolled up for two. Strong goes to a safer chinlock but Aries pops up. That gets him nowhere though as Roderick dropkicks him down for two.

Strong is continuing his career run of not being that interesting in the ring with this match. Aries comes back with a clothesline and hits the Pendulum Elbow for two. The slingshot spinning splash gets the same and Strong is in trouble. A backbreaker out of nowhere (he’s the Messiah of them you know) gets Strong control again and the double knee gutbuster gets a VERY close two. Aries blocks the Strong Hold and hits the corner dropkick. The brainbuster sets up the 450 for the pin on Strong.

Rating: B-. Fun match but it came and went. There’s nothing else to this one at all with no story behind it or anything. This was a way for these guys to get out there and fly around a little bit which worked, but it doesn’t advance anything or prove anything. It was a good match and that’s all it was supposed to be though.

Monty Brown isn’t worried about teaming with Kip James. Cue Kip who says Monty should apologize to Jarrett for wanting a title match. Monty says no so Kip says get your head in the game. Brown says his catchphrase and that’s about it.

Monty Brown/Kip James vs. Lance Hoyt/Apolo

James/Brown injured Apolo’s normal partner Sonny Siaki so this is about revenge. Hoyt and Kip start and this could get bad in a hurry. Lance is a big guy with some agility but he needs someone to work well off of. Kip tries his usual stuff but can’t do anything against Hoyt’s power. After getting slammed by Lance, James heads to the floor for a break. We’ll try Monty instead and it’s the same result minus the break.

Off to Apolo who is a short but well built guy who was a big star in Puerto Rico but he just kind of left TNA one day and was never heard from again. Monty, the biggest star in this match (at this point) gets beaten back and forth for a few minutes like a pinball. It’s FINALLY off to Kip who has a bit more luck. Now we get to the meat of the match with Hoyt in trouble, which is an acceptable option.

Brown and Kip take turns on the big man, trying to keep him down with work on the knee. Brown keeps him in the ring with pure raw power, which is the best thing for a guy like him to do. Off to Kip and he immediately screws up, getting caught in a double clothesline which allows the double tag to bring in Brown and Apolo. Apolo cleans house but gets caught in the Fameasser. That gets James nowhere as he walks into a big boot and the moonsault from Hoyt but Brown knocks him to the floor. Apolo superkicks Kip down but turns around into the Pounce from Brown for the pin.

Rating: D+. Another dull match here but it wasn’t as bad as the opener. Brown was a war machine but he kept getting stuck in stupid matches like this instead of having a big continued push. He wouldn’t have been a great champion but he would have been a solid challenger, kind of like a muscular JBL. This was decent enough though.

Team Canada is without Coach D’Amore due to an injury he has. Petey tries to pep up the team instead and everyone talks about their respective matches tonight.

Petey Williams vs. Chris Sabin

Unless I’m mistaken, they play the wrong music here and Petey comes out to Abyss’ music at first. Sabin was supposed to face Shocker but AAA pulled Shocker out so Williams is the replacement. Sabin works on the arm to start and takes Petey down with an armdrag. They head to the floor for nothing but Sabin comes back in with a middle rope elbow. They head back outside but Chris’ sunset bomb off the apron is blocked.

Sabin tries a dive off the apron but hits barricade to give the advantage to the Canadian. Back in now and Williams puts him into the Tree of Woe for O Canada. A backbreaker gets two for Williams but Sabin starts his comeback with shots to the ribs. Petey is like screw that and hits a big DDT for another two. Off to a chinlock as the fans do their dueling chants thing.

Petey chokes away as Tenay talks about September 11 and Hurricane Katrina. Sabin gets in a kick to the back of the head and everyone is down. Chris gets up first and fires off forearms before they trade chops. Sabin takes over with kicks and a fisherman’s buster for two. Cradle Shock and the Destroyer are both countered but Williams grabs a Sharpshooter.

Sabin gets to the ropes and Petey is getting frustrated. A tornado DDT out of the corner gets two for Chris and both guys are down again. The Canadian hits a Russian legsweep on the American for no cover. The Destroyer is broken up again but Sabin’s missile dropkick misses. The Sharpshooter goes on again but it’s worse than Rock’s. After that gets broken up, Petey misses a charge into the corner and Sabin drives him into the corner again. The Cradle Shock is broken up again, as is the third Destroyer attempt. Cradle Shock (a fireman’s carry into a kind of piledriver) finally hits for the pin for Sabin.

Rating: B-. It’s Sabin vs. Williams. Were you expecting anything but a good and solid match here? The X-Division was on fire at this point and they could have some random matches like this one or the one earlier and have a good match out of it. Good stuff here and considering there was no story to it, this was pretty impressive.

Matt Bentley returns post match and superkicks both guys. He wants an Ultimate X match at Bound For Glory which I think he wound up getting.

We recap Sabu vs. Abyss. This is fallout from a tag match last month that I don’t remember at all. They’re both violent and that’s about it.

Sabu vs. Abyss

James Mitchell wants to make it No DQ and of course it is. Sabu fires away with right hands but they have next to no effect. Abyss throws him around but Sabu keeps coming, likely due to his history of head trauma. A big boot puts Sabu down but he keeps coming back with chops. The fans want tables less than two minutes into the match. Does foreplay mean nothing to these people?

Instead Sabu gets a chair and pounds away with it, including hitting an Arabian Facebuster with it for two. A clothesline puts both of them on the floor and there’s the table. That one is broken though (as in it broke while he was setting it up) so Abyss sets up one of his own. Sabu uses the distraction to hit a flip dive over the top rope and out onto Abyss. They head back in and Sabu charges straight into a backdrop through the two tables at ringside. That’s a bad stretch of luck for him there.

Abyss sets up a table in the ring but takes FOREVER to do it, allowing Sabu to come back with chair shots to the head. Now the fans want thumbtacks. These people are never satisfied. Sabu goes up top with the chair and drives Abyss through the table for three, but Mitchell puts Abyss’ foot on the rope. You know, because in a match based on pure carnage, a foot on the rope is good enough to break it up.

Abyss goes under the ring and gets the tacks which are spread on the mat. They take turns teasing going into the tacks for a bit until Sabu whacks Abyss with a chair. That gets nowhere so Sabu springboards into a Black Hole Slam onto the tacks for the pin with no feet on the ropes this time.

Rating: C+. It’s Abyss vs. Sabu in a hardcore match. What else were you expecting here? They beat on each other with weapons for awhile, Sabu got thrown around a lot, Abyss got hit in the head with a lot of stuff, and someone got thrown into the tacks. What else were you expecting here? The match was just ok but eventually they would have a solid hardcore match with barbed wire everywhere which was a lot better.

Sean Waltman isn’t here tonight so Alex Shelley, the partner he won the Chris Candido Memorial Tag Team Tournament with, will be getting his title match with someone else.

Tenay and West talk about what we just heard.

Bobby Roode vs. Jeff Hardy

Geez wouldn’t THIS be a different match today? Hardy is back in the ring after a few months away, I believe doing a no show. They trade clotheslines to start as Hardy tries to use his speed against the power guy of Team Canada. Well the second power guy of Team Canada as A-1 took that spot from him. Roode heads to the floor and Hardy dives onto him to take over. Back in and Hardy loads up Whisper in the Wind but Bobby pulls him onto the ropes to break it up.

A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two for Bobby as he starts working on the back. Scratch that as it’s a neck crank instead. He switches that up and puts a knee in Jeff’s back and pulls on the arms instead. Hardy comes back with a sunset flip for two but Roode rolls out and hits a low dropkick of all things to take over again. Belly to back suplex gets two. Jeff gets in some right hands and the Whisper in the Wind hits this time for two.

Roode goes back to the back of Hardy but Jeff sweeps the leg and drops his legs between Roode’s legs to slow Roode down again. Jeff goes up but Petey Williams pops up with a hockey stick shot to break up the Swanton. Roode’s superplex attempt is broken up so he runs the ropes like Angle and hits a superplex for a delayed two.

The hockey stick comes in but Jeff kicks him in the ribs and hits the Twist to take Roode down and out to the floor. Jeff loads up a Swanton to the floor but Roode moves before the jump. Petey tries the Destroyer on the floor but Jeff escapes. Now Jeff Jarrett comes out (Hardy attacked Jarrett last month) and blasts the other Jeff with the hockey stick and rolls Roode in for the pin.

Rating: C-. Roode was next to nothing at this point but he was starting to get better. Obviously he would get WAY better eventually as would Hardy, but at this point it was a midcard match. Hardy and Jarrett wouldn’t do much for awhile as they had had their big match almost a year earlier. Not much here but I could think of many worse ways to spend ten minutes.

We recap the tag title match. There was an eight man tag last month between the Naturals (champions), AMW, and Team Canada. Tonight it’s those three teams plus the winners of the Candido tournament in an elimination match. That’s about it.

Jimmy Hart and the Naturals say they’ll keep the belts. AMW comes up for a glare and Storm says his catchphrase.

Tag Titles: The Naturals vs. America’s Most Wanted vs. Team Canada vs. Alex Shelley/???

The Canadians are Eric Young and A-1 here. The Naturals (Andy Douglas with the black hair and Chase Stevens with the blonde) come out with a towel like Chris Candido always had. He was their manager too so that’s a very nice touch. This is elimination rules too. Shelley has no partner here. It’s a big brawl to start until it’s Stevens vs. Storm get us going. Shelley quickly tags himself in to try to steal a pin on Stevens but it only gets two.

Stevens fights back and A-1 hits a knee to Shelley’s back to make sure Stevens isn’t in trouble. That doesn’t sit well with Chase but while he’s yelling, Eric Young tags himself in and beats on Shelley. Off to A-1 for a chop in the corner and a suplex for two. Back to Eric with a front facelock and the double teaming continues. The announcers rip Waltman to no end but Shelley hits a Stunner to Young and a DDT to A-1 at the same time. Johnny Candido, Chris’ brother, jumps over the barricade and gets on the apron to be Shelley’s partner. Not that it matters as he’s almost immediately hit low and rolled up for the pin.

We’re down to three now and it’s Storm vs. Young. There’s the Eye of the Storm for two as AMW is in control. Out to the floor with A-1 interfering again to take over. Back inside and Young gets a suplex for two before A-1 comes in for some choking. Young hooks a chinlock as this match is starting to get dull. Storm FINALLY superkicks Young down and dives for the hot tag to Harris.

Wildcat cleans house and hits a Thesz Press to A-1. Bulldog takes the same guy down but A-1 breaks up the Catatonic. Harris hooks a pretty nice delayed vertical for two on A-1 but as he loads the same move up on Young, A-1 hits him in the back with the hockey stick. Young rolls up Harris for the pin and it’s down to two teams. Stevens comes in again and drops a bunch of legs on Young for two.

Back to Douglas and Young gets the advantage back with some choking. Jimmy leads USA chants on the floor but Douglas gets caught in a Samoan Drop for two. They head to the floor and Eric shoves Jimmy down. That’s crossing a line brother. Douglas hits a jumping knee out of nowhere and there’s the hot tag to Stevens.

The comeback is short lived as A-1 powerbombs the tar out of Stevens to stop him cold. Everything breaks down and Young superplexes Douglas for two. The Canadians load up a Doomsday Device but Jimmy pays them back for attacking him earlier. Young gets crotched and the Natural Disaster to the steak sauce man gets the pin to retain the belts.

Rating: C+. This was ok but it started dragging a lot at times. The stuff with Shelley was a mess but at the same time that wasn’t his fault, due to Waltman no showing. The Naturals were good and having Hart with them helped more than anything else they could have done for themselves. Decent match here but it ran longer than it needed to. At the end of the day, you can only see these people face each other so many times, which is what happened with the Naturals vs. AMW.

Bound For Glory ad.

Rhyno blasts the WWE and says that he’ll win tonight.

We recap the world title match. Rhyno debuted two months ago by Goring Raven through a table. Last month he got a pin in a tag match over Raven to get this title match. That’s about it and Jarrett is lurking for the winner.

NWA World Title: Raven vs. Rhyno

This is No DQ and Raven is defending. Raven brings in his shopping cart full of weapons as is his custom. The weapons are brought in almost immediately and Rhyno bails. He finds a kendo stick from somewhere but stalls more anyway. Raven’s Rules include falls count anywhere apparently. They both have sticks and it’s time for a duel. I don’t think Thesz and Brisco ever did anything like that other than that one show in Boston back in 63. Rhyno knocks him down and chokes with something we can’t see. Apparently it was a nunchuck.

Raven comes back with a pizza cutter to bust Rhyno open. The fans chant that they want pizza. WELL GO BUY IT YOU FREAKING TIGHTWADS! You didn’t pay for a ticket so go buy yourselves a slice! They head to the floor and Raven rams him into a keg. WHY IS THERE A BEER KEG? Either way Rhyno is busted open and Raven finds a ladder. Rhyno hits him with the keg and Raven hits him with the kendo stick. Some cane shots to the back get two.

Raven puts on an ankle lock but Rhyno makes a rope. He slugs Bird Boy to the floor and pops him in the back with a chair a few times. Back inside and Raven is busted open by a garbage can shot. Rhyno does a Joe Face Wash in the corner but Raven grabs the foot for the ankle lock again. Rhyno shrugs that off and pulls out the staple gun. He staples the head of Raven, right on the cut. They didn’t even do that back in Boston in 63.

Rhyno goes up but misses a splash, hitting a chair instead. They slug it out with Raven taking over via the discus lariat. A knee lift puts Rhyno down in the corner and there’s the bulldog for two. Rhyno fights back and here’s Cassidy Riley (Raven worshipper) to help but his distraction means Raven’s DDT only gets two. Rhyno sets up the ladder against a chair like a ramp and then pounds away in the corner on Raven in front of it. If you don’t know what’s coming here, you’re an idiot. That only gets two and both guys are spent.

Rhyno seesaws the ladder into Raven’s face and the champ is in even more trouble than he was before. That also gets two so Rhyno brings the shopping cart inside. This is starting to look like their Backlash 2001 Hardcore Title match which is a good thing. Raven rams him into the cart and avoids the Gore, sending it into the cart. That’s right out of the 01 match and here’s Jarrett. He loads up a belt shot but Jeff Hardy comes down to take the belt away. Raven DDTs Jarrett and Rhyno to retain.

Rating: B-. Decent brawl here but it was too messy for my tastes. Raven was a good champion but him being off TV makes him mostly forgotten. That’s a shame too because he breathed some fresh air into the main event scene. He would lose the title four days later in Canada at some other NWA event, likely because the NWA thought it was a good idea. Anyway, decent match but nothing great.

We recap the main event. Daniels is champion and Joe won the shot last month over AJ. They threw Styles in there anyway and this is the result. Not much else needs to be said.

X-Division Title: Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels

Daniels is the longest reigning champion ever at this point, AJ is a four time champion and Joe is undefeated. This is TNA’s greatest match ever so let’s see if it holds up. AJ and Joe team up to beat down Daniels to start which is kind of a surprising move. Joe kicks him HARD in the back and AJ does the same thing. It turns into a contest and I think Joe wins by a hair. Daniels gets up but Joe kicks him in the face. Cool sequence.

AJ grabs a fast rollup on Joe and we’re ready to get going. They trade pinfall attempts so fast that I can’t type them until Joe hooks a modified Rings of Saturn. Daniels breaks it up and kicks AJ down for no cover. Joe chops the champ and hits a standing enziguri to knock him to the floor. AJ takes Joe down but Daniels is back in to take over on Styles, getting two. Joe chops them both in the corner but Daniels fires back with chops of his own.

Styles headscissors both guys down into opposite corners and fires off kicks at Joe. Joe is like screw that and suplexes him down overhead style. There’s the Facewash to Styles but Daniels breaks up the running kick to the face. Daniels hits a springboard moonsault onto Joe on the floor but you know AJ has to top him, so he hits a springboard shooting star to take both guys down. He rolls Joe back in for two and things slow down a tiny bit.

Actually scratch that as Styles hits the drop down/dropkick combo for two. Daniels comes back in again and monkey flips AJ at Joe but AJ twists in mid air into a rana on the fat man. Daniels O’Connor rolls Styles for two and then launches him over the top and out to the floor. A flying knee sends Joe into the corner and Daniels slaps him in the face. Joe will have none of that and slaps Daniels back but Daniels rolls him up for two.

Joe counters the rollup into the Clutch so Styles busts out Spiral Tap to break up the hold. That gets two on both guys and Daniels sends Styles back to the floor. An STO puts Joe down but AJ breaks up the BME. I feel like I’m talking to a 3 year old after that last exchange with all the spelling. Daniels gets caught in the Tree of Woe and AJ kicks away, but Joe splashes AJ into Daniels. A running dropkick to the face breaks the Tree and Daniels is out.

The running big boot that Joe does knocks AJ’s head into Tallahassee somewhere and the backsplash gets two. Daniels comes back out of nowhere and hits the Death Valley Driver on Joe. Everyone is down until Daniels covers Joe for two. AJ gets sent to the floor and both he and Daniels miss moonsaults. They slug it out so Joe hits a corkscrew plancha to take both guys down. The fans are losing their minds over this stuff. Back in and Daniels breaks up the MuscleBuster but Styles goes up too. AJ and Daniels fight on the top so Joe backdrops both of them down at the same time.

Joe gets up first and he looks MAD. He and AJ slug it out with AJ taking over but Joe slugs him right back and hits a big old German release suplex to take over. There’s the MuscleBuster but Daniels comes in with the belt. He charges at Joe but the Samoan hits a snap powerslam to cut that off. Joe picks the belt up but Daniels kicks it into his face. Daniels and AJ slug it out and that just feels appropriate. A blue thunder bomb out of nowhere gets two on Styles.

Release Rock Bottom puts AJ down and the BME gets two as Joe makes the save. Daniels puts a Dragon Sleeper on Joe and hooks the Last Rites (rolling cutter which he didn’t use that often) to send Joe to the floor again. AJ bounces back up and hits the moonsault into the reverse DDT for two. Styles goes up but Daniels hits a palm strike to stop him. Daniels superplexes him down but he can’t cover. Joe comes in and covers both guys for two.

Joe focuses on Daniels and hits his powerbomb into the Boston Crab into the STF sequence so he can call a LONG spot to Daniels. Daniels (wearing a wedding ring) gets the rope so Joe beats up AJ a bit more. He fires off forearms but AJ snaps off the Pele to take over again. The Rack into a neckbreaker gets two for Styles but Daniels is back up. AJ hits a sunset flip into the Clash but Joe makes the save at two. Daniels ducks a charging Joe to send him tot he floor. AJ and Daniels slug it out and Daniels tries the Angel’s Wings. AJ counters into a bridging backdrop and stays on top for the pin and the title.

Rating: A+. Yeah that’s the easy answer but there’s no real other option to go with here. This was about twenty three minutes long and the longest they go without action is maybe 20 seconds. These three have incredible chemistry together and it was a great example of what smaller guys can do. It’s not the best match in TNA history by a mile but it’s the best match by a few feet. Great match.

Daniels looking up from his knees and shouting NO is the perfect way to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The show is good overall but it’s not a masterpiece. At the end of the day, everything other than the main event is ok but there’s nothing worth seeing aside from that. The main event is an absolute classic for the speed and workrate alone. This is probably the company’s best period ever and it’s a shame that it wasn’t on TV at all. Pretty good show here but the large majority of the worth of it is on the main event. The rest is pretty skippable.

With that, I’ve reviewed every three hour TNA pay per view (this is being written with Slammiversary 2012 being the most recent PPV). I know there are a lot of the two hour shows and I’ve got the first seventeen scheduled already so they’re coming soon. As for TNA, as a whole I think there are more bad/weak PPVs than good ones, but some of them are very good. There are some excellent shows such as Slammiversary 2012, Sacrifice 2007 and Bound For Glory 2011 among others.

In short, TNA is just like most wrestling companies. The PPVs can be hit or miss but it depends on what you have going into them. The problem in the early days of the shows was that they didn’t have a lot of material to fill the cards out with, but that was due to them only having an hour a week for TV. TNA has since fixed a lot of their original issues but like any other company they’ll continue to have ups and downs for years.

The best period is probably 2005-2006 before Angle got there and the company started to evolve into something more like a WWE style company. Whether or not that’s a good thing is up for debate, but the company has grown up a lot over the years. At the moment things are on a hot streak but that could change at any given moment. Overall the shows are probably more bad than good, but there are great TNA shows and they’re worth checking out if you can find them in full.

 

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On This Day: April 24, 2005 – Lockdown 2005: AJ Styles Is Not Human

Lockdown 2005
Date: April 24, 2005
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 775
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

This is the first in the series and has my favorite TNA match ever on it. This is a show I’ve tried to find for a long time so this is a good treat. This was a show that was really weird when you first heard about it as every match is in the cage which was unthinkable when it was first announced. There are 8 matches here and one gets less than 14 minutes so this is a wrestling packed show. The company is still in its infancy here so the angles and a lot of the guys are going to be odd. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a creepy version of Ring Around the Rosey which is supposed to be about the cage. Wouldn’t that be Rosey Around the Ring in this case? The narrator talks about what the cage would say if it could talk. Apparently it’s more or less a haunted house.

West and Tenay tell us about all the different kind of matches we’re having. Yes, we’re actually having a TAG TEAM match in a cage. SHOCKING!

We see Nash sitting in the back and having a staff infection which means he’s out tonight.

Apollo/Sonny Siaki vs. Chris Candido/Lance Hoyt

Hoyt is Vance Archer. Tenay tries to tell us that all of these matches are going to be main event matches because they’re all in the cage. This isn’t a main event match anywhere in the country as Gorilla would not say I guess you would say. Apollo and Siaki are teaming together because they had a match together and are friends now or something. Sounds like a bromance to me.

Candido has been pretending to be hurt lately so no one can trust him. Or they can’t trust him because he’s a heel. That’s always a possibility. Apollo and Hoyt chop it out as the two big guys in this. Apollo gets a jumping back elbow to take him down. The fans chant shut the door for some reason. Candido is helped out of the cage. He had a broken leg and would be dead in four days due to a blood clot. He was 33.

So now it’s a handicap match with Hoyt hitting a moonsault for two. That was rather impressive actually. Siaki had a good look. I’m not sure why he never really did anything outside of this company. Siaki does the running Angle suplex on Hoyt as he’s in big trouble with the faces just picking him apart now. He misses a clothesline and kind of falls down. A TKO from Apollo sets up a top rope splash from Siaki for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was weak but at the same time it’s very hard to grade it fairly given the change they had to make maybe two minutes in. It really was a shame about Candido as he did nothing wrong and still died. I know often times we use the word tragedy loosely but this actually was as it was a pure accident. Anyway, the match isn’t very good but given what they had to work with it was ok.

Post match the Naturals, Candido’s team, comes out to yell at Hoyt who hurts them for a bit before the numbers catch up with him. I’d assume this is to fill in time due to the match likely having to be cut short. This goes on for a very long time.

Dusty is with Traci and Trinity which is a thing that was always disturbing. Apparently AMW and Team Canada got into a fight before the show started and nothing of note happens from that. We get the drawing for the first guys from both (three man) teams in Lethal Lockdown and it’s Jarrett vs. Waltman to start us off.

Dustin Rhodes talks about his match with Bobby (Robert) Roode which is about Texas vs. Canada. Yes, we get it, Texas has a lot of wrestlers and they’re all cowboys. Why are they fighting other than that? Who cares, as it’s a 2/3 Falls Prince of Darkness Death Match. The part that should shock no one is that the Prince of Darkness aspect means nothing at all. Roode was the henchman of Team Canada actually which is surprising.

Bobby Roode vs. Dustin Rhodes

That rock version of O Canada is kind of awesome. Oh ok apparently if we go to the third fall it’s a blindfold match. Why? Who care apparently as we have a gimmick! Roode gets a very fast pin. Or at least we think he did as there’s no signal from the referee, no bell, no announcement or anything like that. Thanks for letting us know that guys.

Dustin wants to do Shattered Dreams but is threatened with a DQ. He does it anyway and apparently that’s just fine. Perhaps it’s because this is a cage match? Top rope suplex to Roode which is saying a lot due to how tall Dustin is. Big powerslam gets two as it’s all Dustin at this point. Dustin gets another low blow but the bulldog is blocked and here comes Roode.

Roode does the multiple covers for two and we hit the chinlock. He shifts it into the rear naked choke. How is this really different than what Joe does where it’s lethal? It’s so weird hearing Roode being talked about as the muscle of the group. Ah apparently it’s not a choke but a camel clutch style grip. That explains a few things. Dustin counters with an electric chair and both guys are down.

Dustin sends him into the door and it pops open and knocks out the cameraman. That’s rather awesome. Set for the Final Curtain or whatever it’s called but Dustin stands around for about 45 seconds which is amazingly enough enough time for Roode to counter into his clothesline to the back of Dustin’s head which gets two because his foot is on the rope. Yes you can get out of a pin in a cage match with your foot on the rope. I give up.

Roode goes for a German off the top but he’s no Kurt Angle so Dustin rams his head into the cage and hits the bulldog to tie it up. I hate that move. And now we put on hoods for absolutely no reason at all. Is there ANY explanation for this being added in? Yep this is stupid as they stumble around trying to find each other and they’ve got nothing.

They finally back into each other so Dustin grabs a headlock but Roode shoves him off. Then they take out the referee as I look for a noose to attach to my neck. D’Amore throws in a chair and then climbs in himself. Roode doesn’t get who is there so he cracks his coach with a chair. Dustin gets the chair and cracks Roode with it for the pin. Sweet goodness this was stupid.

Rating: D-. This was stupid before the hoods and then ridiculous once they went on. What in the world was the point to that? Also we get to hear Dustin’s stupid banjo/country song twice now. Someone explain the point to this gimmick to me? Can anyone do that? I can’t find any explanation for it. Ah Russo was in charge at this point. There’s your answer.

Christopher Daniels runs down XXX and Skipper, his partner in that team. Skipper comes up to yell at him and says the time is right. That match is later of course.

Xscape Match: Matt Bentley vs. Sonjay Dutt vs. Chris Sabin vs. Shocker

I miss the HAIL SABIN thing. The idea here is you have to get rid of two guys by traditional means and then get out of the cage once it’s one on one. This isn’t for anything apparently. Shocker is a luchador. Sweet goodness they have to tag in this. Does anyone think these things through? Sabin and Dutt give us a gymnastic routine to start which gets a well rounded golf clap.

Dutt was insane to watch. He wasn’t particularly good but he was fun to watch. Tenay tries to tell us that this is the tallest cage in wrestling. They’ve never been to an OVW cage match. That this is taller than the Cell. Dutt and Shocker double team Bentley. He never was very good but he’s Shawn Michaels cousin so there you go. Dutt is bleeding from the elbow. Bentley beats him up for a bit. Thankfully the Bentley Bounce isn’t part of this match.

More gymnastics from Dutt who brings in Sabin again. This is a spotfest if I’ve ever seen one. There’s no flow or anything to it as they just move from spot to spot. Not saying it’s bad mind you, but it’s just kind of all over the place. West: the wall of the steel cage is like a wall of steel. Somehow he’s still better than Tazz. Shocker comes back in and gets a cradle on Bentley for two.

Bentley gets a reverse Tarantula on Shocker, as in his legs are wrapped around Shocker’s head and he’s grabbing Shocker’s feet while their backs are facing each other. Dutt comes in to put a chinlock on Bentley so Sabin comes in to put a Boston Crab on Dutt. Cool looking spot but it’s not like it gets us anywhere as they break it in a few seconds.

Sabin hits a BIG running powerbomb on Dutt but Shocker saves for no apparent reason. Bentley sends Dutt into the cage but Shocker cleans house and hits a corkscrew elbow to get rid of Dutt. Shocker vs. Bentley now with Shocker going up but getting hit by a Northern Lights Suplex off the top for two.

Trinity, the chick there with Bentley, comes up to help him so Traci comes out to stop her. And so much for that as she gets shoved off and hurts her ankle. Trinity goes to the top of the cage and hits a BIG moonsault off the top to take out all three guys. Traci comes in again and AGAIN gets shoved out. Sabin gets Cradle Shock on Bentley to get us down to one on one.

Ok so now it’s an escape match. They both get crotched on the top rope and we’re both down. And then they both climb at the same time and fight on top of the cage before both drop down but Shocker hits first. I’d love someone to just jump off the top and run through the door instead of climbing down like that one time. Kind of a weak ending.

Rating: C+. Pretty fun match here but the ending and the tagging hurt it a good deal. That moonsault from Trinity was pretty freaking awesome though and I’m surprised it’s not on more highlight reels. It’s a shame this wasn’t like, for something other than bragging rights I guess. Not bad and I’ve never gotten why Shocker just kind of left as he was pretty good.

We’re told Candido’s leg was broken and we see clips of it. Naturally no one knew what would come of this so it’s not like they were exploiting it.

We recap Hardy vs. Raven which the idea was Raven wanted to hook up with Hardy or something and Hardy said no because he wrestled for his fans (who never got him anything but three WWE Titles and his job in TNA once he left WWE). Raven didn’t like him saying no so he hit him with a garbage can. That sounds like a recipe for a tables match if I’ve ever heard one.

Jeff Hardy vs. Raven

Tables match here because it needed a gimmick clearly. Hardy doesn’t get that apparently and comes out with chairs. TNA supplied the tables I guess since there’s at least one in there when we start. Hardy has been reborn apparently. Wow that happens to him a lot. I love that hole in the cage that TNA uses as it’s a really unique look for cage matches. Raven in control here with pretty basic stuff.

Hardy has some red/pink paint on his skin so it looks like he’s covered in blood. Raven gets the DDT and puts Hardy against a table in the corner. He misses his shoulder into it though so Jeff hasn’t won yet. At least they covered that earlier on. This is getting rather boring rather quickly. Raven is bleeding and it’s pretty bad after a bit. Raven goes up for what looks like the Stroke off the top but they just pretty much jump off the top with no contact at all.

Some New York Mets are here. Twist of Fate by Hardy and now it’s table time again. He’s a rock and roll star now too apparently. Raven is put on the table and Jeff goes all the way up to the top of the cage and takes forever to get there, meaning Raven of course gets out of the way for the big bump. Trinity’s was better. We waste a bit of time with Raven taking control and then Jeff fighting back.

Hardy tries to open Raven up a bit more and then hits him in the back. And there’s a low blow to take care of that offensive streak. Something TNA didn’t get back in the day: long matches don’t mean good matches. Jeff does Raven’s drop toehold to Raven which he isn’t the best at selling. He climbs out for no apparent reason and Raven shoves the door open to crotch Jeff on it.

Apparently when Jeff gets bored he climbs out of cages. It makes as much sense as anything else I suppose. Jeff jumps off as apparently drugs make your balls invulnerable and jumps into a boot. There are pieces of at least four tables in there. Think that’s enough? Actually make that six plus two chairs. Raven sets up two double stacks of tables and then climbs up like an idiot. Jeff knocks him onto them and hits a leg drop off the top to “drive” Raven through them but the lack of room and the high amount of tables made it look like it was in slow motion.

Rating: D. Did ANYONE want to see Raven vs. Jeff in a 15 minute tables match in a cage? Have you ever seen a one fall fifteen minute tables match? Just WAY too long here with Raven being boring for the most part and Jeff just wanting to jump off high things and no sell metal pipes hitting his balls. I fail to see the point here for the most part and this just didn’t do it for me in the slightest. What reason was there for this to be a tables match? Someone explain that to me please. I’d like a reason.

We recap the tag title match which is AMW vs. Team Canada. AMW is the original great tag team in TNA and basically this feud has been going on forever because Team Canada wants the titles.

We recap the Hardy vs. Raven match a bit first because they have to clear the ring.

Tag Titles: America’s Most Wanted vs. Team Canada

This is a strap match and Team Canada is Petey Williams and Eric Young. AMW made this a strap match earlier today so no one got to hear about it. I wonder if that was intentional. Young is just a generic heel here that was only a bit nuts but not quite. More eccentric than anything else. AMW is James Storm and Chris “Braden Walker” Harris. They were awesome and I want one of their trench coats.

AMW are cage veterans after the EPIC cage match they had with XXX which I’ll have to get to soon. Harris and Williams fight on the floor while Young tries to get out but Storm beats the tar out of him up on top. They crotch Young on top and ram his legs into the cage. A-1, the Canadian muscle dude, hits Harris with the belt so he’s stuck on the floor. He gets Storm with it too so the champions are in trouble.

With Harris outside the idiot security guard locks the cage. Does no one pay attention in this company? A-1 keeps beating up Harris on the floor which is fine apparently. Young is a daredevil apparently. He’s still annoying. The Canadians beat up Storm in the ring as we’re just waiting on Harris to make the Superman comeback and get in. Storm is bleeding.

About three fans try to get a let’s go cowboy (Storm’s nickname at the time) chant going and it’s just sad. A-1, back COVERED in acne, sends Harris into the table. Williams and Young get the American flag off the top of the cage and use it to choke Storm before the referee gets it away. Well that was pointless. Storm makes a brief comeback as Harris knocks A-1 into the railing. And so much for that as Young knocks Harris down off the cage and into the railing.

Storm just goes OFF on Young with the strap but walks into a tornado DDT from Williams for two. There’s a you f’d up chant about something but it’s not really clear what. Harris takes A-1 down again before trying to get in for like the 7th time. FINALLY he gets in and takes out Team Canada with a double clothesline that doesn’t hit Young at all but who cares?

This is an actual 2-2 match about ten minutes in. We get it to even or so before the fans chant TURKEY LEGS at something. Williams goes for a Sharpshooter as Young adds an elbow off the top which breaks up the Sharpshooter but only gets two. Young broke up Williams’ Sharpshooter if you missed that as it was a bit odd. Canadian Destroyer is broken up by a Harris spear for two.

Death Sentence (Trash Compactor) misses and A-1 slips the flag/hockey stick in through the camera hole and a shot from that to Harris gets two. When that doesn’t work A-1 slips some powder to Williams but it’s kicked back into his face. He can’t see so he low blows Young and hits the Destroyer on him. A Death Sentence to Williams ends this seconds later.

Rating: B-. Pretty good stuff here with AMW being on defense for the vast majority of the time but eventually winning when they, the champions, were united. Also the whole cheating backfiring thing worked very well too with the evil Canadians trying one time too many to cheat and it catching up with them. AMW was awesome but they had no competition which is what caught up with them eventually.

We recap Skipper vs. Daniels. They lost a match at Turning Point (which the video package gets wrong, saying it was in 2002 when it was 2004) meaning they couldn’t team together again. This led to a fatal fourway at Destination X where Daniels turned on Skipper and pinning him to get the title, setting this up. The voiceover guy is way too upbeat.

X-Division Title: Christopher Daniels vs. Elix Skipper

Let’s see if Daniels can have a match that doesn’t bore me to death. I know he’s like the king of the Indies or whatever but he just bores me to death for the most part other than when he’s fighting Joe or AJ. Feeling out process to start with no one being able to get an advantage. Both finishers are blocked early with a lot of takedowns and nice mat work, especially by Skipper who I’ve always liked a bit.

Can we do something other than a gymnastics competition? There were four attempts at leapfrogs which no one went under so they were just running and jumping. Daniels chops away but walks into a butterfly suplex to give Skipper something of an advantage. Daniels sends him into the cage to reverse that though as we’re almost five minutes in and it’s still little more than feeling out.

This works actually as they were talking about how they knew each other so well before the match so the counters and no one being able to get an extended advantage works. Skipper’s arm is hurt after going into the cage and we have some psychology coming into play. This goes on for a good while as Daniels pounds on it with basic moves for a good while.

An armdrag from the middle rope takes down Skipper again and more arm work follows. By that I mean about five minutes straight at this point. A one arm spinebuster gets Skipper some relief. The announcers are talking about Skipper’s cage walk being listed as the #1 cage match moment in TNA history. Yes apparently there’s a list of cage match moments for a company less than three years old.

Skipper hits a guillotine leg drop off the top to get two. He goes for something that looked like Orton’s backbreaker but the shoulder gives out. Best Moonsault Ever gets two so he goes all the way to the top for I’d assume another one but Skipper gets up to crotch him. He teases the cage walk again but Daniels gets down. Skipper is like screw it and jumps off the top to hit Daniels but takes out the referee too for just a bit. He goes for Sudden Death but his shoulder gives out and Angels Wings (a lifting sitout Pedigree) ends it.

Rating: B. Fun stuff here again with basically a mat based and technical match that happened to be in a cage. This of course begs the question of why was this in a cage. There was no point to having this in there as it would have been more or less the same match without it. Then again why am I looking for logic in a company like this? The match was good though with the psychology playing in throughout the whole match which is the best it’s going to get.

Dusty lets us know the next guy in the Lethal Lockdown match. There are six total so there won’t be a coin toss apparently. In third is….censored, but if you can read lips you can see he says The Outlaw.

We recap Lethal Lockdown which is WarGames light at this point. It’s only three on three here with the main feud being DDP vs. Jarrett who is world champion here. They keep censoring the word Outlaw on this which might be a DVD thing or something. We know who he is already so it’s kind of odd. Maybe a copyright thing. The other guys are Sean Waltman (X-Pac) and Nash (injured remember) with Page and Outlaw (censored) and Monty Brown. Outlaw’s name is censored again and it’s blurred out on the graphic but his face is shown. Very odd indeed.

Lethal Lockdown: Team Page vs. Team Jarrett

You can bring your own weapons and it’s five minutes to start. Waltman vs. Jarrett to start. Waltman is in street clothes and brings a trash can. I guess he brought his home with him and sold his gear for crack. Jarrett is in street clothes too. Please do not call this a bunkhouse match. He has his own trash can full of weapons too. They fight in the aisle to start.

They’re in the crowd now as the cage sits empty. That’s rather unfair to it. I bet it’s lonely. They fight in the crowd and there’s no camera so we can’t see anything. This is already making my head hurt. And now they separate for awhile as the clock for the five minutes continues to count down. On the announce table now with Jarrett getting destroyed. Dang it there’s a bullrope and cowbell. WHAT IS WRESTLING’S OBSESSION WITH THOSE STUPID THINGS???

A chair shot misses Jarrett and after three minutes we’re finally in the cage. Basic cage offense follows with Waltman in control. Bronco Buster misses and both guys are down with forty seconds left. Waltman takes him down as Kip James (not called Outlaw here) is in third. He’s on Team Jarrett and they have a two minute advantage now. What is with the street clothes here?

They spend the vast majority of these two minutes walking around with the occasional stomp coming. DDP comes in and pulls the Singapore cane out like Leonardo pulling out a sword, thereby making him awesome. Things pick up a bit but we’re just killing time here. Monty Brown comes in with DDP controlling for the most part. That’s the last heel to come in.

Brown has a bat and of course a shot to the back of Page doesn’t injure him severely. Jarrett breaks the cane over the back of Page which he still gets up from. The cameraman decides a shot of Jarrett’s legs is more important than whatever the other guys are doing. The final guy is BG James (Road Dogg, who is part of a rap stable with Konnan and R-Truth at this point).

BG hits the referee and we get the showdown between the Outlaws (censored) and it goes nowhere. Bronco Buster to Jarrett. Brown Pounces everyone but Page breaks up the pin. This is more or less just a glorified six man hardcore match. Diamond Cutter to Jarrett gets two as he makes sure to shift over so that Kip can break it up. Waltman and Brown do an awful looking sequence so then they do it again so that Waltman can get the pin.

Rating: D+. Just ok at best here with nothing of note going on. Page’s team wins and the feud more or less went nowhere after this. This was more or less absolutely nothing with too few people, nothing special in terms of violence and just dull overall. Waltman won on a victory roll of all things. A violent match won with a victory roll. Let that sink in a bit.

A bit more brawling goes on afterwards and the Outlaws stare at each other a bit.

We recap the main event. Basically Abyss had been a monster jerk and AJ stood up to him. The match is for the #1 contendership and gets Jarrett at Hard Justice. One of the earliest memories I have of TNA is this brawl they had on Impact where Abyss destroyed him.

Abyss vs. AJ Styles

For the few of you that might be wondering, this is my favorite TNA match ever. AJ is YOUNG looking here which is saying a lot as he’s still young today but here he looks like he’s about 19. He’s a two time world champion here though which is never mentioned anymore for no apparent reason. Abyss is listed at 350lbs here again but he’s a LOT slimmer looking here.

He still has the chains here which were a nice touch for him. I have no idea why but they are. AJ dives through the door to take down Abyss before he gets in. Abyss tries to whip him into the railing but AJ baseball slides UNDERNEATH the railing and jumps up onto it and hits a rana to take down Abyss. That was freaking awesome and happened inside of five seconds.

All AJ to start as we’re still on the floor. Abyss had more or less been unstoppable recently since splitting from his stablemate Alex Shelley (let that sink in for a bit) so this is a major showdown and seeing Abyss reeling is odd to see. Abyss fights him back and whips him into the railing again so this time AJ channels his inner Morrison and double jumps up to a platform into the crowd, spins around and jumps over FIVE ROWS of fans to his the forearm on Abyss. This is one of the most awesome performances I’ve ever seen and we’re maybe three minutes into this.

AJ dives at Abyss on the railing ala Sting but instead of crashing into it clears the railing by a good foot and hits the ground in the crowd. Abyss pounds on him a bit but AJ just kicks the tar out of him to escape for a bit. West talks about Kenny Chesney for absolutely no apparent reason.

They open the door of the cage after about six minutes of brawling. The difference between this and the stupid stuff before: this was INCREDIBLY entertaining and the fans were way into it as opposed to Jarrett and Waltman walking around and occasionally hitting each other with something. AJ and Abyss never stopped moving and the fans were into it because of it. The difference here: hard work works better than walking around hitting each other with weapons.

AJ punches Abyss HARD but gets the cage door slammed into his arm and then his face where he snaps down to the floor. It looked like he got hit by a bus or something as fast as he hit the ground. Great selling there. AJ is busted open and Abyss pounds away even more. AJ finally in the cage now as Abyss looks under the ring for the bag of tacks. About eight and a half minutes in they’re in the cage together.

Abyss chokes him with the chain and we play tug of war. AJ simply will not quit and keeps hammering away to no avail though. With the chain on the top turnbuckle, Abyss launches AJ over his head in kind of a forced leapfrog and his head slams into the chain. The fans think this is awesome and for once they’re right. They stop for a bit for the a neck crank and AJ sells it perfectly too.

AJ charges again but Abyss grabs him in a gorilla press and LAUNCHES him up to just let him crash down. He tries it again but AJ counters into a DDT onto the chain. Two punches and an enziguri takes Abyss down as does a headscissors. AJ hits a moonsault press but Abyss just lets him bounce off which was cool looking. AJ sends him into a chair into the corner that Abyss set up and gets a German suplex for two that looked freaking good.

He goes for the Styles Clash but Abyss is way too big for that. Chokeslam is countered into a rollup for two. AJ gets another running start but walks into the Black Hole Slam for a VERY long two. Dang Abyss looks awesome (what am I saying?) when he really uncorks that thing. Yep there are the tacks. Black Hole Slam into them are countered as is a powerbomb.

AJ gets the Styles Clash (ok more like a falling face first slam but we’ll give it to him) into the tacks for two. Wow I would have bet on that being the ending. You know if I didn’t know the ending already. Abyss is ROCKED here which was unthinkable until this match. AJ goes to the top of the cage and Abyss can’t catch him. His solution: throw the referee at the cage to knock AJ off. That was awesome.

Abyss climbs up as AJ is barely hanging on. He goes up with the chain and might be thinking to hang him as he had on Impact. Yep that’s what he’s going for. AJ is on the outside and Abyss on the inside and yep he’s hanging him. AJ gets the chain off somehow and Abyss grabs the chokeslam. AJ bites his fingers and opens them up too! AJ jumps off the top of the cage and hits a freaking sunset flip powerbomb onto the tacks from the top of the cage to get the pin as Abyss is DEAD.

Rating: A+. OH YES! AJ was absolutely amazing here and it was definitely Abyss’ best match ever. This was just a total war for twenty minutes with AJ never stopping and taking it to Abyss much like Flair did back at Starrcade 93 to Vader. There was no gimmick here as it was just a big old fight in a cage with weapons brought in for fun. AJ would get the title the next month….and then lose it to Raven the next month because the world was clamoring for more Raven and less AJ. Uh…sure. He wouldn’t get it back for over four years.

Overall Rating: B. If you cut off about an hour of this show (as in three of the first four matches or so) this is an awesome show. The first two matches were pretty bad, the third was decent, Hardy vs. Raven got fifteen minutes which was just ridiculous and then the rest other than maybe Lethal Lockdown was very good. The early days of this company’s PPV era were very hit or miss and this one was a hit for the most part but for the most part this worked. Fun show but VERY dragging so I’d recommend a fast forward button here.

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Genesis 2005: Christian Cages Comes Calling

Genesis 2005
Date: November 13, 2005
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 900
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

It’s the month after Bound For Glory and there are two things of note: there’s a major debut tonight, and Eddie Guerrero died earlier in the day. The main event tonight is a six man tag with Rhyno/Team 3D vs. Jarrett/AMW with no stipulations on it, which means I have no reason to care about it. I can’t stand matches like that but they tend to happen once in awhile. If this is half as good as BFG was I’ll be a little surprised. Let’s get to it.

The show is dedicated to Eddie Guerrero. Nothing wrong with that.

The opening video is about starting a new voyage and a new day and all over beginning things like that. There’s a lot of Clinton and Kennedy clips in there too. The main matches get some time too.

Raven vs. ???

This is more of Raven vs. Larry Z in a feud that no one cared about. Larry is in the ring and offers him a release again, which Raven can sign or face the opponent. Bird Boy gives him a double bird. Again we hear about some girl that might be controlling Raven, which I think would wind up being Daffney. The mystery opponent is P.J. Polaco, more commonly known as Justin Credible.

They have to call him the former Justin Credible because of legal issues. You get that a lot in TNA. Justin takes him into the corner to start and hits some forearms. Raven gets him down and pounds him down as we hear about Raven holding Justin down or something. I guess they mean in ECW, where Justin was pushed as a huge deal for YEARS. Justin (screw this PJ nonsense) comes back with a knee to the ribs and another one to take Raven down. He stomps on Raven in the ribs as Mike tries to tell us about a rivalry these two had for the Hardcore Title.

A baseball slide dropkick gets two for Credible. Out to the floor and Raven goes into the barricade. Off to a chinlock back in the ring as we hear about Raven’s history of having people fall under his control. Now it’s a dragon sleeper. A knee sends Raven to the floor and Justin finds a kendo stick. Cassidy Riley, a Raven follower/tribute guy, comes out but gets caned for his efforts. Raven takes over in the ring and catches a superkick into an ankle lock. Justin escapes and hits a bad DDT for two but walks into the Raven Effect for the pin.

Rating: D. Not much here but I’m no fan of Justin. Raven was hot in 2005 but man this Larry feud pulled him down through the floor. At the end of the day, it’s Larry Zbyszko, the man who can suck the life out of a crypt. Also, Justin and Raven really just worked together in ECW and had a brief feud in late 1999/early 2000 that not many people likely remember. Not the best opener to say the least.

We recap the Kru vs. Team Canada which mostly covers last month’s events. Kip is the guest referee in their hockey stick fight tonight. Konnan still doesn’t trust him.

The Kru talks about the surprise debut tonight (who isn’t mentioned by name here) and says that the rats are leaving the ship, meaning WWE. BG thinks Kip is cool but Konnan disagrees.

Team Canada vs. 3 Live Kru

It’s a hockey stick figdht, which means hockey stick on a pole but you have to be legal to grab it. So it’s a hockey stick on a pole match. Got it. This is A-1, Roode and Young. There are six total hockey sticks, one for each post. Sweet merciful corn on the cob can someone get Vince Russo some decaf? Kip James is guest referee. Team Canada tries to go and get the sticks before the match starts because no one is legal then, so we start with a brawl.

Kip tells Konnan to go to the corner and we get BG vs. Roode. Less than 30 seconds after we get settled, Eric (in headgear for some reason) climbs up and gets a stick. Kip takes it and breaks it over his knee then takes the headgear away. Ok then. Roode sends BG into the buckle and I can’t believe we’ve only had one stick grabbed in the first minute. BG comes back with the dancing punches and the shaky knee drop for two.

BG starts going up for a hockey stick but has a small nose bleed. There are SO many jokes. Tag to Truth who goes up but Roode saves the stick. Never mind as it comes down anyway and lands in the Kru’s corner. Leg lariat gets two on Roode. Off to Young who has about the same luck. Konnan comes in and puts his shoe on the end of the hockey stick. Egads this match gets stupider and stupider.

BG goes up for another stick but after he gets it, Roode electric chairs him down. A-1 comes in for some two counts. Kip has been neutral so far. Back to Young who gets two off a backbreaker. He goes to get a stick but BG knocks it out of Young’s hands and to the floor. Back to Young for a slug out but BG gets caught in a full nelson slam. Roode gets the fallen hockey stick but Truth disarms him.

Tag off to Truth and everything breaks down. Ax kick to A-1 but Roode hits the DVD and Young drops the elbow. Now it’s Konnan’s turn to clean house and he puts the Sunrise on Young but Roode saves. Another stick is brought down and it’s sword fighting time. The Kru takes over and it’s a double What’s Up onto two hockey sticks onto Young’s balls for the pin.

Rating: D. WOW this was overbooked. Seriously, six hockey sticks and a guest referee? Nothing to see here either as this feud would finally end the next month at Turning Point. The wrestling was pretty basic and Kip offered nothing at all to this. The point is that he can be trusted, but any referee could have done what he did here.

Kip gets to pound fists with Konnan as apparently they’re all cool.

Abyss and Mitchell are ready for that new talent acquisition. As for Sabu, the No DQ rule won’t bother Abyss and the barbed wire won’t bother him either. It’s opening Pandora’s Box and they crush an egg. This takes awhile to get through.

Tenay and West talk about the acquisition but don’t say who it is. The guy isn’t here yet.

We run down the rest of the card, 35 minutes into the show.

The Acquisition arrives and he’s coming to the arena. A countdown starts and it’s Christian Cage making his debut. Christian says the rumors are true but stops for Christian Cage chant. Jarrett and company are watching in the back and don’t like what they see. Christian says he’s not going to say the same thing every week and that he’s not here because he got fired. He made the jump on his own choice. WWE offered him a very large contract but he’s here because he loves wrestling.

He’s known to crack a joke or two, but he’s the best in the world today and that’s not a joke. He’s tired of politics and he wants to see wrestling reinvented. Last night he was watching Impact and it reminded him of when he showed up 8 years ago. Today there are still two companies, and just like back then, one is old and boring but now the young and hot one is TNA. He’s here to win the world title because that’s how he rolls.

Cue Scott D’Amore, the Team Canada coach. Roode comes out with him and D’Amore is very happy. He talks about some old times that Christian, himself, Adam, Jericho and Lance had when they went to Bret and Stu’s house. D’Amore says that if they unite with Jarrett’s team, they could rule this place. Christian has a question but Roode cuts him off and says Christian needs to realize the opportunity before him. Roode says we want an answer now but D’Amore tells him to chill. He throws Christian a Team Canada shirt and asks for an answer by the end of the night. Christian says he’ll think about it.

We recap the #1 contender’s match between Monty Brown and Jeff Hardy. Both are top guys and want a title shot. Brown issued an open challenge and Hardy took him up on it.

Monty Brown says that he’s not worried about Christian and calls him out to the Serengeti. Jeff Hardy can bring it too. They’ll both be Pounced.

Jeff Hardy vs. Monty Brown

Winner gets Jarrett at some point in the future. The fans are almost universally behind Hardy. Jawbreaker slows Brown down….then Hardy sticks his hands out and shouts before crawling on the ground. Brown grabs him into a fallaway slam to take over. Jeff avoids a charge and Monty goes to the floor, but Hardy’s baseball slide misses and he hits the steel. Brown throws him into the crowd and Jeff is in trouble.

Jeff walks on a barricade and dives onto Brown who was nice enough to stand there and let him. At least he’s polite. Back in and Jeff is almost immediately thrown back to the floor over the top. The fans are split but the fans are more in Hardy’s corner. Whisper in the Wind misses and Hardy is in trouble. A double clothesline hits and both guys go down. Now Whisper in the Wind works and Jeff starts his comeback. Legdrop between the legs makes Monty’s eyes bug out.

The Twist of Fate is countered into an Alpha Bomb attempt but Jeff counters into the reverse Twist of Fate, which of course West calls the same thing. Either way it only gets two. Jeff goes up for the Swanton but it only hits mat. Monty gets up and CRUSHES Jeff with the Pounce for the pin. Apparently this just moves Monty up in the rankings instead of giving him a title match. You know, because that’s SO much different than any regular match right?

Rating: D+. This wasn’t much for the most part. Jeff’s selling was great of course but Monty was pretty much just another power guy. He wasn’t bad or anything but not much aside from his finisher made him stand out or anything. Not a bad match or anything but it’s really just kind of there.

We recap the Elimination X match which is an X Division Survivor Series match. Daniels is a captain and calls his team the Ministry. The other team is called…..uh…..Not The Ministry I guess. Joe thinks he should be captain instead of Daniels.

The Ministry minus Joe wants to know where Joe is but Daniels says don’t worry about it.

Samoa Joe/Christopher Daniels/Alex Shelley/Roderick Strong vs. Chris Sabin/Austin Aries/Sonjay Dutt/Matt Bentley

The Ministry is pretty packed. Bentley has Traci with him. Aries looks really different minus the mustache. Strong vs. Bentley to start us off. This is standard Survivor Series rules. Strong controls with a quick headlock so Bentley does exactly the same thing. Off to Sonjay who flies around a lot in some standard spinny flips. Off to Shelley who looks way different as well. They go VERY fast, resulting in an STF by Shelley. It doesn’t get him anywhere but it looked good.

Shelley gets him into the corner and tags in Joe to a BIG reaction. Joe hits a bunch of Facewashes and a running one to take his head off. Dutt gets to the corner for a moonsault press but Joe walks away. Dutt faked him out though and hits the press for two. Joe responds by kicking his head off and hitting the backsplash. The crowd is eating Joe up and there’s a lot to eat there.

Daniels comes in but so does Aries, who takes him down with a flying body attack. With Daniels’ arm firmly controlled, it’s time for Sabin. I think he’s his team’s captain too. Captain or not, he hits some WICKED headscissors to have Daniels all spun around. Joe knees him in the back though and an STO puts Sabin down to take over for the Ministry. Off to a chinlock but Sabin fights up and kicks Daniels down.

Off to Aries who cleans house on Daniels and Strong. Strong counters the brainbuster and hits a Nightmare on Helm Street. Everything breaks down and Strong hits a rack into a backbreaker on Sabin. Bentley and Daniels head to the floor and the other six are all in now. Joe gets triple teamed and knocked to the floor and everyone on Bentley’s team other than Bentley hit stereo dives. Aries and Strong go back in and Aries hits the brainbuster followed by the 450 to eliminate Strong. Daniels comes in immediately and rolls up Aries with tights to tie it up. There weren’t ten full seconds between pins.

Dutt vs. Daniels now as it’s 3-3. Sonjay takes him down and drops a leg for two. Off to Bentley who doesn’t do as well, getting slowed down by a knee and allowing a tag to Shelley. Sabin comes in as well and hits a seated dropkick to the back of Shelley’s head for two. Sonjay comes back in and cleans house, knocking Joe and Daniels to the floor (with Joe leaving a HUGE sweat stain). Dutt cleans some more rooms of the house but Shelley hits what we would call White Noise and hooks a modified crossface for the tap out.

Shelley walks into a superkick from Bentley for a quick pin, leaving it as Daniels/Joe vs. Bentley/Sabin. Bentley suplexes Daniels down and brings in Sabin. Daniels gets put in the Tree of Woe and Sabin hits the hesitation dropkick for two. Off to Joe who gets dropkicked down but he pulls out a powerslam for two on Bentley. Joe misses a running knee smash in the corner and it’s off to Bentley and Daniels. Release Rock Bottom and the BME get two.

Daniels goes up again but Sabin comes in as well for a double superplex, but Joe makes it a Tower of Doom which really just hurts Daniels even more. Joe knocks Bentley into the corner and fires off some Facewashes. Bentley pops up out of nowhere and superkicks Joe down for two. He gets on Daniels’ shoulders but Joe pops him in the face, hits the MuscleBuster and the Clutch gets it down to two on one. Sabin has to fight off both of them so he hits a tornado DDT on Daniels and an enziguri on Joe at the same time. Sabin takes Joe down again but can’t Cradle Shock him. He escapes the MuscleBuster but Angel’s Wings end this.

Rating: B. I don’t get why they never did another one of these. It’s a perfect kind of match for a PPV as it ate up almost 25 minutes and we got some great action out of it. It’s no classic or anything, but it got the signature stuff out there on PPV. The teams were a little lopsided though and that hurt things a lot. Still quite good though.

Joe is mad at Daniels for getting the winning fall and kicks him down. He goes to the floor and CRACKS daniels with a chair and hits a MuscleBuster on him, followed by a second on the chair. This would basically be what turned Daniels face. He gets stretchered out and AJ watches, looking distraught.

Jarrett and AMW say they’re ready for anyone that TNA throws at them.

We recap Abyss vs. Sabu. The idea is that Sabu can’t beat him one on one but Abyss is terrified of barbed wire, so Sabu has a weapon to use.

Abyss vs. Sabu

No DQ. Abyss has a chair and his chain. Sabu of course has….nothing. He had his arm covered but when he pulled the towel off there was no barbed wire (there had been at an earlier show). Abyss bails to the floor and Sabu dives on him to take over early. Sabu sets up a table but Abyss takes over and sends him back in. Abyss beats on him VERY slowly as I’m assuming they have a lot of time here.

Sabu is bleeding from the nose. For some reason Abyss goes up, only to be ranaed down. Sabu sets up a chair but it goes upside his head for his efforts. Abyss wedges the chair between the ropes but due to the law of wrestling, he goes head first into it. Triple Jump Moonsault almost totally misses and it’s out to the floor (complete with an F Bomb from Sabu) where Abyss is driven through the table with a slingshot flipping legdrop.

Abyss gets up first and picks up his bag of tacks. As he’s laying them out though, Sabu pulls out a barbed wire chair. Mitchell pulls it away, but Sabu hits some clotheslines in an attempt to put Abyss into the tacks. Abyss is like screw that and chokeslams Sabu into the tacks but it only gets two. He loads up a Frog Splash but lands on tacks, which gets two for Sabu. Camel clutch goes on but Abyss makes a rope. Sabu gets the chair but Abyss knocks him down. Powerbomb onto the chair is countered by a Black Hole Slam onto the chair (FREAKING OW MAN!) gets the pin. Abyss wasn’t scared of it at all.

Rating: C-. It was very violent and the ending was sick, but it’s nothing we haven’t seen a million times before. Abyss being scared of the barbed wire went nowhere at all which didn’t help anything here. The match wasn’t that bad but it’s just another hardcore brawl with some sharp stuff involved.

We recap the X Title match which came about from Williams “winning” Ultimate X at the last PPV and then winning another one on Impact to make up for the botched ending last month.

AJ says he’s never seen eye to eye with Daniels but he respects him. Joe broke the unwritten X Division Code and AJ will deal with him. Oh and he’ll beat Petey.

X-Division Title: AJ Styles vs. Petey Williams

Feeling out process to start with AJ hooking a weird leg lock rollup for two. Styles does the drop down into the dropkick spot which is always good. A pair of kneedrops gets no cover. Petey countered the Clash attempt and gets to the apron. AJ knocks him off and hits a flip dive but lands on the barricade and bounces into the crowd. A-1 comes out and offers a distraction which goes nowhere.

Back to the apron and Petey tries a German off the apron but AJ hangs on to avoid a nasty case of death. And never mind as it actually works and AJ’s back goes into the barricade. FERAKING OW MAN!!! A-1 gets thrown out. Back in the ring a regular suplex gets two and it’s off to a bodyscissors. Styles fights out of that pretty quickly so Williams fires off some kicks to the ribs.

Petey misses a shoulder in the corner but as AJ tries a springboard, Petey drops him onto the ropes. A SWEET rana to the floor works on the back even more. Back inside now and it’s the Tree of Woe and O Canada. We reach a point that is so boring that we get a replay from the German off the apron from earlier in the match. Back to live action and AJ hits the Pele. He goes after the ribs with a series of gutbusters and now it’s Petey in trouble.

AJ’s flurry results in a Styles Clash attempt but Petey escapes and rolls him up for two. Styles comes back with a neckbreaker for the same. They trade rollups and chops and the Clash is countered again, this time into a DDT for two. The Destroyer is countered and it’s off to the Sharpshooter instead. As Styles goes for the rope, Petey hooks his arm to block the rope break. That was creative.

AJ gets there anyway and heads to the apron for the springboard forearm. Petey gets up first and heads to the corner but AJ enziguris him down. Petey tries a super Destroyer but AJ knocks him down. Styles sees Joe with a towel with Daniels’ blood on it and Williams crotches him. That gets him nowhere though as AJ hits the Clash from the middle rope for the pin to retain.

Rating: B-. Pretty good match here but it’s not AJ’s best stuff. It was very clear that AJ was going after Joe next so it was hard to believe that Petey was much of a threat to the belt here. Still though, this was good and the idea of who could hit their finisher first was a nice story for it. Good match but not great.

We recap the main event. Basically it’s Planet Jarrett vs. the top face tag team and the top face heavyweight. All I can say is thank goodness this was Rhyno instead of Nash. I don’t get why they had to take the title off of him so fast though. Let him keep it for a few months. Jarrett would beat him in a singles match at Turning Point anyway. This gets the music video treatment which isn’t bad.

The Dudleys and Rhyno say they’re ready. Why does that take a few minutes to get through?

Team 3D/Rhyno vs. America’s Most Wanted/Jeff Jarrett

Nothing on the line here, which is the kind of main event that I can’t stand. Team 3D comes out last instead of the guy that was world champion two weeks ago. Jarrett and AMW run into the crowd in different spots, apparently wanting to start out there. The Dudleys say cool and the bell rings as the ECW guys head into the crowd. It’s one of those brawls where you can’t see a thing.

Rhyno is beating on Jarrett near some empty seats and Ray throws Tenay’s chair at I think Storm. D-Von rams Harris into the Spanish Announce Table as Jarrett and Rhyno go WAY up high. A low blow knocks Rhyno down some stairs and Ray misses a chair shot which hits the post instead. We’re over six minutes into a fifteen minute match and they haven’t been in the ring together yet.

Storm misses a beer bottle shot and we’re FINALLY getting back to ringside together. D-Von hits Harris with the bell and Ray uses a cheese grater on Storm IN THE RING. Harris is busted now. Here’s a table but Harris moves it to keep Storm from going through it. The referee is totally cool with all this stuff. Ray takes a cheese grater to the balls. Rhyno is on the stage and hits Jarrett with a garbage can.

The table gets moved again to keep Harris safe and there’s a LOUD chair shot that we only hear. Rhyno drags a table up to the stage as we’re ten minutes into this match. Rhyno throws the table upside down and then piledrives Jarrett on the stage rather than on the table. The table gets set up in front of the tunnel and after he hits Storm, he charges….right into the superkick from Storm.

I think we have a normal match now with Storm vs. D-Von. It only took them 12 minutes. Catatonic is countered into a reverse inverted DDT for two. Storm comes in (no tag, the villain) for a reverse tornado DDT. Bubba Bomb gets two on Storm but the one to Jarrett is blocked with a low blow. Stroke gets two. Rhyno comes in from nowhere to Gore Jarrett but Harris pulls the referee out. AMW crotches Rhyno on the post and hits a double spinebuster on Ray. Hart Attack gets two on D-Von. Ray breaks up a Death Sentence through the table and a 3D pins Storm.

Rating: C. I have no idea what to call this. They were in the ring about 2 minutes out of nearly 16 so you can barely call this a match. As a fight it wasn’t bad, but at the end of the day, what does this mean? Team 3D wouldn’t get the titles until April of 2007 so it didn’t mean much for them. This was a throwaway main event but it certainly wasn’t boring.

Jarrett hits Rhyno with a guitar post match so the Dudleys set up a table. After getting a fresh one, Gail tries to hit Bubba low. Bubba blocks that and sets to powerbomb Gail through Jarrett through the table. Team Canada comes in for the save and puts D-Von on the table. Jarrett goes up top but Christian comes in with a chair.

He unzips his jacket to reveal a Team Canada shirt. D’Amore hugs him and gets pulled into an Unprettier. Jarrett gets slammed off the top and takes a 3D through the table (with the Dudleys doing a double flapjack and Christian doing the cutter for some reason). Christian reveals a TNA shirt to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This wasn’t a bad show at all but it wasn’t that memorable. Christian debuting is by far and away the biggest thing here, but other than that, nothing really happens here. No titles changed hands, partially because only one was defended. The main event should have just been Jarrett vs. Rhyno II and let Jeff get the belt back here. It’s not a bad show, but it’s not one that you would ever need to see again.

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