2nd Annual Battle Of The WWF Superstars: We Lost (Includes Full Video)

Battle Of The WWF Superstars II
Commentators: Sean Mooney, Lord Alfred Hayes
Host: Sean Mooney

This is another Coliseum Video and much like a good many of them, it really doesn’t have a theme. The previous edition was only notable for Sean Mooney doing a really bad Patton impression so hopefully they have something better this time around. You never can tell with these things though so let’s get to it.

This is from the summer of 1991.

We open with a preview of some WrestleFest 91. Randy Savage jumps in to say he’ll be hosting the tape, which wasn’t very good.

Sean Mooney is indeed the host again and the Patton stuff continues, thankfully without the voice.

We see Mooney driving up to meet his troops, promising them a lot of action.

From Orlando, Florida, February 18, 1991.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Roddy Piper

Perfect, with Bobby Heenan, is defending and this should be good. They take their time to start with Perfect spitting gum into Piper’s face, earning himself a beating out to the floor. The chase gets Perfect back inside so Piper puts the referee in the corner to start the fight. That has Perfect bailing out to the floor again before coming back inside to lose a slugout. Piper even grabs Perfect’s singlet to hold him in place for more right hands.

The singlet is ripped off, leaving Perfect in regular trunks for a weird look. Piper gets up for a double clothesline but can’t follow up, allowing Perfect to putt he singlet on again. Back up and Perfect starts choking before kicking away at the ribs. A dropkick puts Piper on the apron and it’s time to remove a turnbuckle pad. That’ll be for later apparently as they go to the pinfall reversal sequence, before a kickout crushes the referee.

Piper is sent into the exposed buckle, allowing the PerfectPlex to (eventually) get two. Another ram into the buckle is blocked and they go outside, with Piper ramming him into the steps a few times. Piper finds a belt for some whipping but Perfect sends him into the barricade. Perfect goes up top but gets crotched back out to the floor, allowing Piper to beat the count for the win at 12:18.

Rating: B. This is a case where it wasn’t about the action, which was just ok, but rather having a hot crowd and playing along with them. Piper and Perfect knew exactly what to do here and it wound up working so well. Piper could got so much out of so little and when he had someone as good as Perfect to boost it up, things got even better. Very fun match here, even if it was mostly goofy.

From New York City, New York, January 21, 1991.

Nasty Boys vs. Bushwhackers

This is the Fan Favorite match, meaning a fan requested it, and for once I can kind of believe that. Jimmy Hart is here with the Nastys as Luke and Knobbs start things off. Knobbs bails into the corner to start and everything breaks down in a hurry. The brawl sees the Nastys cleared to the ring so whacking can ensue. Back in and Sags takes over on Butch to slow things down a bit. It’s quickly back to Luke and some Battering Rams clear the ring and it’s time to march.

We settle back down to Sags getting in a chair shot to Luke so the villains can actually take over for a change. Butch is drawn in, allowing some elbows to keep Luke down. The big elbow in the corner misses for Sags though and the tag brings Butch in to clean house. Everything breaks down and Luke makes a save, only for Sags to elbow Butch and give Knobbs the pin at 7:48.

Rating: D. And then we go back in the other direction with this drek. This was every bit as bad as you would have expected, with the Bushwhackers doing their comedy and the Nastys doing their best to sell it. The problem is neither team can do much other than brawling and this was more about the comedy, which made for a rough match.

From New York City, New York, November 24, 1990.

Bret Hart vs. Barbarian

Hart is half of the Tag Team Champions at this point and it feels like these two fought a dozen times on Coliseum Video. Barbarian powers him down to start and kicks him in the head. Hart’s attempt at a comeback sees him tossed into the corner but he avoids the rope walk elbow. That lets Hart’s middle rope elbow connect and there’s the running clothesline for two more. Barbarian is right back with a powerslam before he blocks a piledriver. Instead he sits down on Hart and poses, allowing Hart to get the sunset flip for the pin at 4:10.

Rating: C. You could more or less guarantee that was going to be the finish, if nothing else due to how many times they did the EXACT SAME THING. The match itself was fine, but what are you supposed to do with a match this short? This felt like “get Hart on the card on his own” more than anything else, which was fine.

And now, trivia, asked by wrestlers! Well some of them at least.

1. What was the official symbol for Hulk Hogan’s return against Earthquake?

2. What tag team was known as the “Pink & Black Attack?”

3. Why was the Big Boss Man mad at Bobby Heenan?

4. What is Mr. Perfect’s finishing move?

5. What caused Jake Roberts to lose his vision?

Not exactly tricky here.

From Orlando, Florida, February 18, 1991.

Jake Roberts vs. Kato

Mr. Fuji and Tanaka are here too. Roberts is in some weird blue/yellow tights and that’s a very strange look for him. An early wristlock sends Kato bailing over to the ropes but Roberts stays on the arm, even lifting him up by said arm. Kato fights up and is elbowed in the face, followed by another takedown by the arm. The threat of the DDT sends Kato bailing out to the floor, only for his cheap shot to be cut off.

Another attempt at the DDT has Kato on the floor again but he’s back in a bit faster this time. Roberts runs into a knee in the corner and gets sent outside for a cane shot to the back. Tanaka gets in a shot of his own and Roberts finally gets back inside. Some left hands and the short clothesline drop Kato but Tanaka sneaks in to break up the DDT. The DDT connects a few seconds later but Tanaka comes in for the DQ at 7:04.

Rating: D-. Freaking KATO? There is something to be said about protecting wrestlers, but not only was Kato beaten, but Roberts fought all three of them off and had the match won. This was a one sided match against a villain who was in way over his head and he can’t even take a fall. I have no idea what the thinking was here but there was no reason for it to go this way.

Post match Roberts fights the team off and chases Fuji to the back with the snake.

We get a profile on Jim Duggan, meaning the soldiers now have 2x4s.

We start with Duggan in a building made of wood, where he gives us a tour of his collection of 2x4s, one of which is autographed by people with wood related named (Woody from Cheers, James Woods and the Chairman of the Board, Frank Sinatra). Ok that’s at least clever.

From New York City, New York, March 15, 1991.

Jim Duggan vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Non-title flag match and General Adnan and Hulk Hogan (in camouflage) are here too. Duggan slugs away to start and Slaughter is down in the corner early. Actually we’ll make that out to the floor, meaning it’s time to hit the stall button. Back in and they lock up, with Slaugher backing him against the ropes. That earns him a big shove and the right hands, which Duggan always made look good.

Slaughter manages to get in a kick to the face though and some choking on the ropes has Duggan in more trouble. Duggan slugs up again but gets caught in a sleeper to slow him back down. That’s only good for two arm drops before Duggan gets up and sends Slaughter into the buckle. Slaughter knocks him down again and actually goes up for a top rope knee. Hogan even gets jumped from behind, which is enough to let Slaughter go up again but get shoved down for the crash.

Hogan and Adnan just come on in, with Slaughter going outside to beat on Hogan some more. Some cable choking has Hogan down and now it’s back inside for some knee drops to Duggan. The camel clutch goes on so Adnan gets on the apron for the sole purpose of allowing Hogan to hit Slaughter with the board. Duggan eventually gets up and covers Slaughter, which draws in Adnan for the save and DQ at 14:12, because after everything else before that was fine.

Rating: C-. The match itself wasn’t good, but the heat did help a lot. At the same time, it’s rather clear that Hogan is going to win for America at Wrestlemania and Slaughter didn’t even get to look strong here. It was a long match and did feel important, but there was no hiding the fact that Slaughter was on borrowed time and everyone knew it even more this match.

Post match Slaughter and Adnan beat up Hogan and Duggan, allowing them to wave the Iraqi Flag. Slaughter leaves but forgets the title, with Adnan coming back to get it and….yep that’s going to be a beating for him. At least the American flag is waved. Wrestlemania was in 9 days so America would be avenged soon enough.

Duggan goes to a lumber yard to get some fresh 2x4s. And yes, the man who cuts his wood is named Woody. And yes, we watch the board be cut.

From Cedar Rapids, Iowa, April 16, 1991.

Jim Duggan vs. Smash

Mr. Fuji is here with Smash, who was mostly a singles wrestler at this point. They take their time to start, with Duggan of course knowing how to play to the crowd to keep them going. Smash backs him into the corner but gets clotheslined down a few times. The third sends him outside but he comes back in to take over on Duggan in the corner.

Some forearms in the corner set up a neck crank, followed by a legdrop for two. We’re back to the neck crank, which allows Duggan to fight up and slug away in the corner. That means Duggan gets to tell the referee to LAY OFF MY BACK, as was his custom. Fuji’s distraction doesn’t work and it’s the three point clothesline to finish Smash at 6:11.

Rating: C-. Well at least Duggan got the pin. It was just over Smash, who was kind of hanging around until he got something fresh at this point, but at least Duggan got the win. That’s not much of a focus on Duggan, but that’s oddly the case with a lot of these Coliseum Video profiles, which was always a weird way to go.

Mooney is lost but finds his way to the next match.

From Ft. Wayne, Indiana, October 30, 1990.

WWF Title: Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Savage, with Queen Sherri, is challenging and this is a dark match from after the fourth Main Event. Warrior runs in, clotheslines him down, hits the usual, and it’s the gorilla press into the Warrior Splash to retain at 1:32. Warrior didn’t even have his face painted and commentary pointed out that something had to be wrong with Savage.

From Savannah, Georgia, January 29, 1991.

Ted DiBiase vs. Tugboat

Ok then. DiBiase tries to jump him to start but gets clotheslined outside instead. Back in and a rake to the eyes just makes Tugboat mad so he whips DiBiase into some corners. DiBiase needs a timeout on the floor and comes back in to get elbowed in the face. The elbow drop misses for Tugboat and DiBiase bails again, this time with Tugboat giving chase.

That goes as well as you would expect, with DiBiase catching him on the way back inside. Some choking has Tugboat down again and they go outside, with DiBiase choking against the barricade. Tugboat manages to post him and they go back inside for some splashes in the corner. DiBiase gets in a shot of his own and tries the Million Dollar Dream, which is broken up rather quickly. Tugboat misses a charge into the corner though and DiBiase gets a rollup for the clean pin at 6:41.

Rating: D. Another rather lame match as Tugboat is the biggest example of “I liked him when I was a kid but wow he does not hold up.” There’s just nothing to him here and DiBiase had nothing to work with, which is why they got out of there pretty quickly. The change to Typhoon would help, but there was only so much that Tugboat in any form was going to be able to do.

Mooney uses binoculars to see….the Tag Team Match Of The Month logo. Are we sure that’s not a Viewmaster?

From Chattanooga, Tennessee, January 8, 1991.

Power & Glory/Warlord vs. British Bulldog/Legion Of Doom

Slick is here with the villains. Hawk glares around a lot to start before punching Roma in the face a few times. The top rope clothesline misses though and Roma stomps away in the corner. Something resembling a dropkick sends Roma outside, where he actually takes over. Back in and Roma hits a much better looking dropkick but Hawk pops back up with a neckbreaker.

Animal and Warlord come in for the power off, with an exchange of shoulders going to a standoff. Animal’s flying clothesline (which almost goes over the head) drops Warlord and it’s off to Hercules for a clothesline of his own. Bulldog comes in and gets knocked down as well, with Warlord adding the elbow drops. Warlord ducks his head so Bulldog can get in a leapfrog but Roma cuts off a powerslam attempt. The villains take turns stomping on Bulldog until Warlord gets most of a full nelson. Bulldog starts to power out and everything breaks down….for a double DQ at 7:17.

Rating: D+. ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? Power & Glory were about to lose to the LOD in less than a minute at Wrestlemania but they can’t do a job here in a six man tag off a fluke rollup or something? After the rest of this wretched tape, you would think we could have one more actual win for the good guys but nah, let’s just keep doing weak stuff like this to wrap up the tape.

Mooney wraps it up and is driven away in a jeep (or tank, according to HHH), but isn’t pleased with his driver’s abilities. Yeah seriously that’s all they have for the big closing. You’re surprised?

Overall Rating: D. Piper vs. Perfect aside, this was one of the worst tapes I can remember coming from Coliseum Video. It’s one pitiful match after another with people not being able to take a pin for whatever reason, despite this being released months later. Some of these finishes actually had me getting mad, which came after seeing some of what we were watching (Roberts vs. Kato actually being booked is amazing in its own right). Absolutely horrible stuff here, though Piper vs. Perfect is definitely worth a look.

 

 

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Battle Of The WWF Superstars: Exactly. What? (Includes Full Video)

Battle Of The WWF Superstars
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan, Lord Alfred Hayes, Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura, Hillbilly Jim
Host: Sean Mooney

This is a Coliseum Video from around 1990, which is quite the fun time from the company. I remember seeing this in the video store as a kid so I’m sure I’ve seen it a few times before, though I don’t remember a single thing about it. That often makes for the best possible option as I’m basically coming into it blind. Just please don’t be bad. Let’s get to it.

Sean Mooney welcomes us to the show, which has a theme of war, meaning Mooney is in camouflage and a helmet. He hopes we need to avoid the agony of defeat and runs down the card (in what sounds like a Patton impression).

Rhythm And Blues (with Jimmy Hart) promise a lot of singing, dancing and guitaring.

The Bushwhackers say….oh pretty much exactly what you would expect them to say about Rhythm And Blues.

From New York City, New York, April 30, 1990.

Rhythm And Blues vs. Bushwhackers

Jimmy Hart is here as well. Luke (still in his hat) works on Honky Tonk Man’s arm to start as commentary tries to figure out how the Bushwhackers are related. Honky Tonk Man fights back and ax handles Luke on the ropes, only to get ax handled in the back. Butch makes things serious by going after Honky Tonk Man’s hair before grabbing the mic and calling him GREASEBALL. Or is he talking about Valentine?

Either way the villains go to leave but Hart (in an Earthquake jacket rather than a Rhythm And Blues jacket) calls them back. Valentine comes back in to elbow Luke down and it’s time for some strutting. Butch comes back in for some double clotheslines and it’s time for more whacking. Honky Tonk Man takes Butch into the corner though and it’s time to start the slow beating but we get the nearly required heel collision. Monsoon: “You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make a duck out of him.” Heenan: “Exactly. What?”

A clothesline puts Luke down though and it’s time to take turns with various forearms. Honky Tonk Man’s fist drop sets up the chinlock, with Butch getting to play cheerleader. Valentine tries to come in to cut off the comeback but hits Honky Tonk Man by mistake. Butch comes in to clean house and everything breaks down, with Luke chasing Honky Tonk Man to the back with a chair. Unfortunately Valentine is the only one left in the ring and the Bushwhackers are counted out at 13:03.

Rating: D+. One of the points of a tag match starting things off is to have some fun, usually in a fast paced style. Instead, this went long, wasn’t any good, and ended with a lame countout. It’s not like this was some red hot feud or anything. You really didn’t have a Rockers match laying around somewhere instead?

Post match Valentine beats on Butch some more until Luke makes the save with the chair. Of note, Hart celebrating the win is one of the reasons he was so good at his job. In theory, Hart should be especially happy because his team won and therefore they get more money. That’s a logical reaction for him and he sold it perfectly.

Mooney explains the tournament (that voice he’s doing is getting really annoying) for the vacant Intercontinental Title, as Ultimate Warrior had to vacate the belt after winning the WWF Title. We skip the first two rounds and arrive at the finals.

From Austin Texas, April 23, 1990. This is the tournament final, which of course was taped one day before the last match of the first round. Wrestling is weird.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Tito Santana

For the vacant title and commentary argues about who would be the favorite. Ventura: “You and I come from different sides of the street.” That’s one way to put it. Perfect grabs an early waistlock so Santana elbows him in the face, much to Ventura’s annoyance. They go to the mat with Santana working on the arm, which Ventura says is Perfect testing how far Santana will go with the rule breaking.

Santana knocks him outside before throwing him back inside for the slingshot shoulder. The armbarring continues, with even Ventura admitting that it’s a nice one. That’s broken up so they run the ropes, with Perfect tripping him out to the floor for a crash. Naturally this leads to an argument over whether that was luck or skill, because that’s what Ventura and McMahon would do.

A quick sunset flip gives Santana two so Perfect clotheslines him neck first into the ropes (ouch). Santana is fine enough to crotch him on the post and wrap the leg around the post. Back in and Santana starts on the leg, including wrapping it around the rope. Cue Bobby Heenan as Santana tries the Figure Four, which is reversed into a small package for two. Heenan even gets on the apron for a distraction and a small package gives Perfect the pin and the title at 7:31.

Rating: B-. Shockingly, two talented wrestlers have a good match, with the stakes making it all the better. Perfect was a great choice for the title, as he had been built up for a long time and needed something to cement him as a star. At the same time, Santana was the ideal choice for him to beat, as he was just good enough to feel like a serious threat to take the title as well.

Post match Perfect introduces Heenan as his new champion. Why he has an old tag belt instead of the Intercontinental Title isn’t clear.

Dusty Rhodes talks about his daughter laying her head on his chest and hearing the heartbeat of America. You might want to get that checked.

From New York City, New York, February 19, 1990.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Akeem

Sapphire and Slick are here too, with Sapphire knocking him out to the floor before the bell. Akeem backs him into the corner to start and gets elbowed in the head, meaning it’s time for both of them to gyrate a bit. The threat of another elbow drops Akeem, with Rhodes laughing at the idea that he didn’t even have to hit Akeem.

Back in and another elbow sends Akeem into the ropes, with the arms getting tied up. Akeem knocks him down as well though and a nerve hold goes on. As Heenan continues to rant about Sapphire not being a manager, Slick gets in a cheap shot on Rhodes, allowing Akeem to elbow Rhodes in the back of the head (Rhodes: “OH S***!”).

Rhodes fights out of another nerve hold and gets in some less than great looking right hands in the corner. Akeem’s bearhug doesn’t last long and Rhodes start elbowing, with Sapphire cutting Slick off. Akeem gets a lot more evil by going after Sapphire, with Slick shoving her as well. The dancing Slick knees Akeem by mistake though and Rhodes beats the count at 9:03.

Rating: C-. Ok so the match wasn’t great, but Rhodes was doing his thing and the managers were running around on the floor for the sake of some humor. That’s all this needed to be and while it wasn’t good, it was entertaining enough. Rhodes was hardly a great star in the ring, but he knew what he was doing out there every single time.

Rhodes, in an apron with no shirt underneath, is at a butcher shop. We see various meat and that’s it. Rhodes: “You sure can’t beat my meat.”

From Fresno, California, August 9, 1989.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Big Boss Man

Slick is here with Boss Man but this is the pre-Sapphire days. They circle each other a bit to start with Boss Man shoving him down. Rhodes is right back up with a knockdown of his own but an elbow drop misses. The neck crank doesn’t last long and Rhodes is back up with the elbow to the head. The big elbow drop connects but Slick comes in for the DQ at 2:56. Why did they even include this?

Post match the beatdown is on but Rhodes fights back, steals the nightstick and hat, and kidnaps Slick. Boss Man’s response to this is to yell a lot while standing in the ring.

Rhodes is now at a stable and shovels manure, which he calls “fuel”.

From Phoenix, Arizona, February 13, 1990.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Randy Savage

Queen Sherri is here with Savage while Rhodes has Sapphire. Rhodes knocks Savage to the floor and the women argue, allowing Savage to come right back in and jump him to start fast. Savage knocks him into the corner to start but makes the mistake of going after Sapphire, meaning it’s time for the early elbows. Rhodes gets knocked outside though and it’s the top rope ax handle to the head back inside.

The chinlock doesn’t last long so Savage sends him outside again for another ax handle. Rhodes starts shaking his head though and that’s never a good sign. Sherri gets in a few shots so Rhodes goes after her, allowing Savage to get in a cheap shot to take over again. That’s enough of a distraction for Savage to get in a shot with the loaded purse for two so Sherri offers a distraction.

Savage’s choking triggers the Hulk Up (with Rhodes even putting his hands on his hips while on his knees for a funny visual) and Rhodes sends him crashing into the corner. Sherri decks Sapphire to little avail as Sapphire is back up to steal the loaded purse. Savage is knocked out to the floor for a ridiculously fast countout at 7:11.

Rating: C-. This was about as basic of a version of their match as you could get, as that purse was in there almost every time. It wasn’t like you were watching this match for the quality, but Rhodes was never exactly one to burn up the mat in the WWF. The match made sense on paper, but the execution wasn’t quite working.

Post match Rhodes tells Sherri, who he calls a “street walker” to get her “a**” in the ring if she wants some of Rhodes’ brown sugar (meaning Sapphire). And of course Sapphire drops her in a hurry.

Alfred Hayes shows us a sped up video of an arena being set up for a WWF show, going all the way to the opening bell. Of note: he says they’re in Binghamton, New York, where “no less than 20,000 fans” will be here. That arena holds a capacity of 7,200 people and at one point in 1990, the WWF reportedly drew 2,300 to a house show in the arena. What a liar.

It’s time for the Fan Favorite Match, meaning a fan requested this match.

From New York City, New York, January 15, 1990.

The Genius vs. Jim Neidhart

The lying is spreading around here as there is no way this match was requested. Genius gets to prance a bit to start and throws in a cartwheel, plus a standing backflip. They finally lock up and Genius is shoved down with ease. Neidhart shoves him down again and Genius blames a non-existent hair pull. Genius has an idea and tries to shove Neidhart away, only to fall flat on his face in a funny bit.

Neidhart knocks him to the floor, gets annoyed at Genius’ cartwheel, and throws him out again. The chase goes to the Genius, who catches Neidhart with a dropkick on the way back in. Genius punches away but a running crossbody gives Neidhart a quick two. A knockdown lets Genius go up but his moonsault hits raised knees. Genius charges into a boot in the corner and the chase is on outside. Cue Mr. Perfect with a scroll shot to the head to give Genius the pin at 9:20.

Rating: C+. This was little more than a comedy match for the most part, with Genius playing well into his strengths. That’s something he did well for his entire time in the WWF and it worked again here. Neidhart was fine as a foil and having Perfect cheat to cost him the match worked. They didn’t overthink this and it went fine as a result.

From New York City, New York, December 28, 1989.

Ted DiBiase vs. Jake Roberts

No DQ and Virgil is barred from ringside. DiBiase bails outside to start before going back inside for a quickly broken lockup. Roberts snaps off the left hands and the big right hand puts DiBiase on the floor for an early breather. Back in and Roberts starts in on the arm with a variety of crankings to put DiBiase down. Roberts lifts him up by the arm before grabbing a hammerlock on the mat. DiBiase reverses into one of his own, which is broken up just as fast.

An elbow sends DiBiase back to the floor, where it’s time to hold his arm for a bit. Back in and Roberts is right back to the arm as this is going about as well as most of their matches. DiBiase fights to his feet and gets taken down back down, meaning they get to lay around for more arm work. Roberts gets knocked into the ropes, with his eyes getting tied up, allowing DiBiase to slowly hammer away.

A swinging neckbreaker stays on the neck (that DiBiase previously injured) and a piledriver lets DiBiase gloat before getting two. Naturally we hit the chinlock as I try to figure out why they bothered with the No DQ. Maybe they have something else, but we’re over twelve minutes into this and there has been nothing that makes the stipulation necessary. The comeback is cut off with a quick clothesline, meaning more stalling can ensue. The chinlock goes on again for awhile, with DiBiase covering for two.

A middle rope ax handle misses though and they go outside, with the chase allowing Roberts to hit a running knee lift. Roberts slugs away…and charges into a knee in the corner to slow things right back down. The Million Dollar Dream goes on but Roberts falls into the ropes. That means Roberts crashes out to the floor, where he pulls a yelling DiBiase shoulder first into the post. Back in and Roberts actually goes aerial (!) for a middle rope knee and there’s the short arm clothesline. The DDT finishes DiBiase clean at 18:37.

Rating: D. It was long, it was boring, and there was absolutely no need for the No DQ rule. Other than maybe the posting near the end (and that’s a huge stretch), they did nothing that stood out in any way. These two had all kinds of matches against each other but for some reason it always wound up going this way. Just more boring stuff here and it felt like it went on forever.

Post match Roberts grabs the Million Dollar Title but now Virgil shows up to take it back.

And now, trivia!

What was the first match at Wrestlemania I?

Who sang the National Anthem at Wrestlemania I?

How much weight did Dino Bravo bench press?

Wrestlemania II was held in which three cities?

Who was the female co-host in each city?

What was the record-setting attendance at Wrestlemania III?

What is the name of Sean Mooney’s identical twin brother?

Who did Randy Savage beat to win the WWF Title at Wrestlemania IV?

Who returned to the WWF on the Brother Love Show at Wrestlemania V?

What rank did Sean Mooney have on this tape?

Eh I’ve heard weaker tests.

From Lacrosse, Wisconsin, May 15, 1990.

WWF Title: Ultimate Warrior vs. Mr. Perfect

Only Warrior is defending and Perfect bails outside for his entrance, which is probably not a bad idea. Perfect tries to jump him from behind but gets tossed outside without much trouble. The beating goes outside until Warrior brings him back in for the big running shoulders. It works so well that they do it again, followed by Warrior sending him face first into the buckle, with Perfect clearly doing all of the work.

The Warrior Splash misses though and Perfect kicks him in the ribs a few times, followed by some chops on the floor. Back in and a middle rope fist to the jaw doesn’t even knock Warrior down. Something like a top rope double stomp to a standing Warrior (even commentary didn’t think it looked good) drops him but the PerfectPlex gets two. The shoulders and Splash retain the title at 5:53.

Rating: D. What was that? You show Perfect winning the title an hour and a half ago and he loses in a short match here where his finisher doesn’t work. Oh and Heenan wasn’t even here to make up for some of Warrior’s issues. At the end of the day, Warrior looked miserable out there and that’s a big issue. If you’re a month and a half into your title reign, you should be able to show some energy in a five minute match. Come on already.

And of course Mooney knocks himself out with his gun to end the tape.

Overall Rating: D-. It’s a bad sign when the best match on the tape is a just ok match between Santana and Perfect. That was almost completely negated by the terrible main event and the even worse DiBiase vs. Roberts match. This was a good example of just how bad things were when Hogan wasn’t around, as he at least could have breathed some life into this thing. Rather terrible offering here, with Neidhart vs. Genius of all things being the second best match.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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WWE Vault Grab Bag III: Classics, Old Favorites, And The Nasty Sensation

WWE Vault Grab Bag III
Commentators: Trevin Adams, Mister Saint Laurent, Byron Saxton, Gordon Solie, Wade Barrett, Gorilla Monsoon, Gene Okerlund, Billy Graham, Ron Trongard, Lord Alfred Hayes, Joey Styles

We’ll do this again, as there are so many matches released on the Vault and I want to take a look at them. As a result, I get to put together something like a playlist of random matches. This makes for some interesting options and hopefully that is the case again here. There are no connections to these matches and that makes it more fun. Let’s get to it.

From Millennium Final (a German exclusive PPV).

European Cup: Sting vs. Kevin Nash

It’s a tournament final and boxer Axel Schultz is guest referee. Nash powers him into the corner to start and hits the elbows, including the framed one for good measure. Sting goes for the leg to take him down and the referee (in a hat) keeps checking on Nash, who has to tell him that it’s cool. Back up and Nash gets in a shot in the corner before booting a Stinger Splash away. Snake Eyes sets up the running crotch attack on the ropes for two, followed by a side slam for the same. Sting fights out of the chinlock, knocks him down and grabs the Scorpion Deathlock for the fast tap at 5:39.

Rating: C-. It was pretty clear that they didn’t want to do much here and they got out pretty quickly. That’s fair enough as Nash had already worked earlier in the show and the fans were going to go nuts for anything anyway. It was basically a quick “send them home happy” match and the fans are going to cheer for Sting no matter what.

From Evolve 63 (I told you these would be random).

Ethan Page vs. Drew Galloway

Anything goes and Galloway is of course better known as McIntyre. Page takes him down by the legs to start and the fight is on fast. They go outside with Page throwing a trashcan at him but Galloway avoids a ram into the wall. Instead Page kicks him in the face and they go up some steps, with Galloway getting in a low blow but Page knocks him back down.

A chair to the back keeps Galloway in trouble and Page suplexes him on the floor to make it worse. They fight towards the entrance with Page hitting a superkick but getting dropped hard onto the floor. Galloway sends him back into the ring and it’s time for a piece of the barricade to be thrown inside. Some chairs are tossed in as well but Page uses the delay to fight up and grabs a small ladder.

The ladder is thrown inside but page takes too long and gets chaired down again. The ladder is set up and Page gets powerbombed off for two in a big crash. Galloway can’t piledrive him onto a pair of open chairs, as Page backdrops him onto the chairs for two instead. An RKO is shoved into the chairs though and the Futureshock onto the chair gives McIntyre the pin at 14:53.

Rating: B. They did a nice job of beating each other up, though they never quite got to that next level where it felt like two people who hated each other trying to take the other out. If nothing else, it’s weird seeing Page in a big time serious singles match but he did well enough. Galloway is of course awesome at pretty much anything he does and it makes sense that WWE would want this version of him back.

We go to Florida in 1978 for a press conference, showing NWA President Eddie Graham announcing an NWA World Champion Harley Race vs. WWWF World Champion Billy Graham title vs. title match at the Orange Bowl in Miami on January 25, 1978. They both have to put up $25,000 and the purse goes 70/30. They’re both ready to win (and I know it’s them because the “hello, my name is” tags) and prove that they’re the best, with Gordon Solie having some wine. Apparently the referee is still up for debate.

At a later date, we get a face to face exchange of promos, with both of them saying pretty much exactly what you would expect. Race says he has heard this kind of thing time after time from someone who wants to be where he already is. Graham better be ready for the toughest fight he has ever had. That’s fine with Graham, who takes his shirt off to show his muscles. Race says he doesn’t need any of that because he’s already the best.

We go to the match, with special referees Gorilla Monsoon and Don Curtis. It’s pouring rain and we only see clips of the match, including the two of them fighting over a top wristlock. Graham wins the power battle and hits a running shoulder and we’re clipped to Page hitting a piledriver before tying up the leg. We’re clipped again to Graham getting the first fall with a bearhug, which is apparently 40+ minutes into the match.

Another clip shows them crashing out to the floor and Race suplexes him back in to tie the score. Graham is busted open and Race grabs a sleeper, which is broken up with a rake to the eyes. We’re clipped again to Race dropping a headbutt for two but Graham’s back elbow gets the same. Race gets the sleeper again and time expires with Graham basically out cold. I won’t rate it as it was only about seven minutes of sixty, but it was an old school slow paced fight which probably wasn’t overly great.

From Florida Championship Wrestling, January 31, 2010.

Rotundo Brothers vs. Usos

That would be Bo (Bo Dallas) and Duke (Bray Wyatt) vs. Jules (Jey) and Jimmy (Jimmy). Bo and Jimmy start things off with Bo grabbing some early rollups for two each. The front facelock has Jimmy slowed down and a middle rope clothesline sends him outside. The chase on the floor allows Jules to get in a cheap shot and hammer Bo down into the corner. A running Umaga Attack connects for two and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up and a double elbow from the Usos sets up…uh, well actually a double elbow from the Usos.

Something like a Demolition Decapitator gets two and the double headbutt sets up a sliding chinlock (ok then). Bo fights up with a quick powerslam and it’s off to Duke to clean house. A headbutt that looked a bit low gets two with Jimmy making the save as everything breaks down. Bo is knocked outside and a double Samoan Spike (looked more like a double chop) finishes Duke at 5:20.

Rating: C. This is a perfect example of “oh that match happened?” and then you realize why it isn’t that well known. All four of them were still new at this whole thing so there was only going to be so much to be seen anyway. The Usos were basically getting what they would become, while the other two were miles away from their more famous versions. That’s the point of developmental though and develop they all did.

Dark match from before Monday Night Raw, July 28, 1998.

Minoru Tanaka vs. The Fallen Angel

Yes it’s Christopher Daniels, yes he has hair, and yes it’s a weird look. Tanaka kicks at the leg to start but Angel go up the corner to yell at the fans. Back down and Tanaka kicks away some more before a cross armbreaker sends Angel over to the ropes. A headscissors does the same but this time Angel is back with a spinebuster. Angel slowly pounds him down and yells at the fans some more but Tanaka is back with some more kicks.

The spinning kick misses though and Angel grabs a spinning belly to belly for two. What would become the Angel’s Wings connects and the fans certainly like that one. The cover gets two, plus a bell, with the referee having to call it off. Tanaka hits a dropkick and a backdrop driver for two each, followed by a German suplex for the pin at 5:03.

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches where you could see that both guys had something to them and they would get there with some more time and experience. At the same time, it’s kind of interesting that Daniels never got a run in WWE. You would think it would have happened at some point but he just never got there (while doing fine elsewhere). On the other hand you have Tanaka and….yeah I’d say he did pretty well.

From Madison Square Garden, June 16, 1984.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Iron Sheik

Boot Camp match, meaning anything goes and falls count anywhere. Slaughter gets a big pop while Sheik (with Ayatollah Blassie) is booed out of the building. Slaughter runs in and beats on Sheik with the helmet as they’re certainly starting fast. Sheik gets whipped with the riding crop and the fans are going absolutely nuts. Some stick shots to the throat have Sheik in more trouble and a headbutt with the helmet makes it even worse.

The slingshot sends Sheik into the corner but he reverses a whip, allowing Slaughter to do his signature crash over the corner. That’s good for two on the floor and it’s so weird to see this kind of thing in the WWF. Back in and Sheik whips him with a belt before going with some simple choking. Slaughter manages to fight back up and sends him outside, followed by a hard shot to the back inside. Sheik’s boot to the head doesn’t get him very far and Slaughter punches him down for a double breather.

Slaughter sends him crashing out to the floor, where a backbreaker gets two. They’re quickly back inside where Sheik loads up the boot (uh oh), with Slaughter blocking the ram into said boot. Instead Sheik sends him into the post and it’s time to start the spitting. Slaughter is busted open so Sheik bites at the head and kicks him with the loaded boot. Slaughter fights out of the corner and hits a middle rope…uh, flying kick to the head (almost a Stomp), with Sheik being busted open as well.

The big right hands, including the wind up version, drop Sheik for two (with the referee getting back inside to count, as it’s a fight otherwise) but the Slaughter Cannon is cut off. Sheik hits the gutwrench suplex for two more, followed by a regular suplex for another two. With nothing else working, Sheik takes his boot off but walks into the Slaughter Cannon. Slaughter grabs the loaded boot, loads it even more, and knocks Sheik silly for the pin to blow the roof off the place at 15:58.

Rating: A-. I wasn’t expecting much from this but they beat the fire out of each other and the fans were totally hooked. Slaughter was on fire at this point and it was great to see him getting this kind of a reception. At the same time, the Sheik was more than holding up his end. I know he gets all of the attention for being insane, but he can absolutely hang in there with anyone. This was great and absolutely worth seeing.

Dark match from before the November 23, 2007 Smackdown.

Drew McIntyre introduces this one, saying it’s a dark match that everyone wanted to see, though it should probably have stayed in the Vault.

Nasty Boys vs. Drew McIntyre/Dave Taylor

This is an infamous one. The Boys certainly take their time getting to the ring and Sags makes sure to pose a lot on the floor as Knobbs drives Taylor into the corner to start. Taylor does it right back to him as the fans certainly like the Boys. Knobbs hammers away with right hands and grabs a hiptoss. The Boys send McIntyre and Taylor into each other and it’s off to McIntyre, who wants Sags.

McIntyre gets sent hard into the corner for some chops, followed by a hard running clothesline for two. Knobbs comes back in for an elbow drop and the Pit Stop makes things even worse for McIntyre. A hard pumphandle slam gives Sags two and it’s back to Taylor for some uppercuts. Sags avoids a charge and McIntyre runs into Taylor, allowing Sags to come back in for a fireman’s carry/facebuster combination. Ignoring that Sags completely misses McIntyre’s head and Knobbs just drops him, it’s enough for the pin at 5:20.

Rating: D+. There’s a reason this match is more infamous than famous and a lot of it is due to the Boys apparently being very rough with McIntyre. They were also out of shape and then spent a LONG time celebrating after the match, to the point where the start of Smackdown was rushed. If you watch it on its own, it’s just a not very good tag match, but this was all about the behind the scenes stuff and details.

From Madison Square Garden, June 25, 1988 (this is on a bunch of home video releases but let’s see it again).

WWF Title: Randy Savage vs. Ted DiBiase

Savage, with Elizabeth (to counter DiBiase’s Virgil), is defending in a cage. DiBiase jumps him to start fast and Savage is sent into the corner, which just fires him up (like it takes a lot). The comeback is cut off with an elbow to the face though and DiBiase stomps away again. It’s way too early for an escape attempt though and Savage sends him into the corner over and over.

Savage ducks his head though and gets hit in the face as Elizabeth is doing her usual worried face. There’s the fist drop from DiBiase (which always looked great and does here again) but it’s still way too early to climb out. Savage is sent hard into the cage and then dropped with a clothesline but he’s able to cut off DiBiase’s climb again. Virgil earns his pay by going up to stop Savage’s escape attempt though and they’re both back down.

This time Savage reverses a whip into the cage and gets a needed breather. Another climb is cut off by Virgil and DiBiase is there to hammer away. Savage’s clothesline puts both of them down again and he goes for the door, with DiBiase making his own save this time. This results in Graham suggesting that Elizabeth gain about 80lbs of muscle so she can be more valuable in these situations.

With that disturbing image out of the way, it’s a double clothesline to leave both of them down again. They both go up a different corner and of course Virgil is there for the save. A suplex puts DiBiase down and an atomic drop sends him into the cage again. Savage goes for the door and Virgil slams the door onto his head.

DiBiase tries to get out and gets pulled back inside so they can slug it out from their knees. Another ram into the cage puts DiBiase down again and Savage climbs, with Virgil cutting him off AGAIN. This time a fan even climbs the cage and is quickly pulled down, leaving Savage to get in a double noggin knocker and drop down to retain at 12:21.

Rating: B+. This was one of those matches where it felt like a fight between two guys in a structure designed to make it more violent. There weren’t very many matches like this one from this era and this is one of the best, as you had two incredible talents who worked very well together. They feuded for a long time and this was probably their best match, which is quite the accomplishment.

From ECW Wrestlepalooza 1998.

TV Title: Sabu vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam is defending and Bill Alfonso is officially managing both of them. As a bonus, crooked referee Judge Jeff Jones is in refereeing the match. Sabu dives for the legs to start but can’t get anywhere, leaving Van Dam smirking a bit. The fourth or so attempt works but Van Dam is right back up to miss a kick to the head. Van Dam takes him down with a quickly broken headscissors and they bounce off the ropes a bit for the standoff.

Alfonso approves and Van Dam does the Sabu pose before offering a pat on the back. Actually hang on as Van Dam gets the mic to say they’re not going to fight because they have a plan. We get a tease of double teaming Jones but Sabu kicks Van Dam in the face to take over, with the plan apparently being dropped. A slingshot flipping legdrop gets two on Van Dam and Sabu sends him to the floor for the flip dive.

Back in and the single arm camel clutch goes on, with Van Dam looking…well about the same really. With that broken up, Sabu flips over him, followed by Van Dam doing the same (albeit to Sabu rather than himself). Van Dam kicks him down and hits the corkscrew legdrop for his own near fall. Naturally Alfonso is suddenly a huge Van Dam fan, which is a perfectly logical move for him.

The surfboard has Sabu in more trouble and the slingshot legdrop on the apron connects, with Van Dam crashing out to the floor. Back in and Van Dam grabs a half crab, with Alfonso’s whistling getting all the more annoying. The rope actually gets Sabu out of trouble so Van Dam kicks him in the face. That lets Van Dam bridge a table between the apron and the barricade but Sabu is right there with a dive. The triple jump dive is loaded up but Van Dam gets off the table, only for Sabu to hit a big dive into the crowd anyway.

Back in and Sabu pelts a chair at Van Dam’s head so they’re already back on the floor. Van Dam fights back but Alfonso won’t hold a chair for him, with Alfonso saying he’ll call it down the line and be a winner no matter what. Smart move really, in a Bobby Heenan at the 1989 Royal Rumble way. Sabu is back up with a crotching onto the barricade into an Asai moonsault. The triple jump moonsault misses back inside though and Alfonso is pro Van Dam again.

Van Dam knocks him outside for a crash and there’s the big no hands flip dive for the cool visual. A suplex from the apron through a table is blocked and Sabu’s not great looking springboard moonsault hits Van Dam in the ropes. Van Dam is sent back onto the table as Joey Styles is having a hard time believing that these two are friends. Sabu uses the chair as a stepping stone to the ropes, setting up a DDT onto the table.

Back in and Sabu throws the chair at Van Dam’s head again, setting up a hurricanrana through the table. This means a lot more waiting around as they get to whatever they have in mind next, which is the main theme of the match. Van Dam fights back and catapults him throat first into the bottom rope, setting up a top rope legdrop onto the chair onto Sabu’s face. They go outside (again) where Sabu gets in a hurricanrana off the barricade. Back in and a quick Van Daminator gives Van Dam two and the Five Star connects for the same in a rare kickout.

The monkey flip out of the corner sends Sabu crashing onto the chair for an arrogant two. That’s not good for Sabu, who hits an Arabian Facebuster onto the back of the head for two of his own. Another table is loaded up but it’s already broken so Van Dam kicks him through the rest of the thing.

Van Dam brings in another table and kicks him onto it, followed by a heck of a chair shot to the head. The Five Star through the table only gets two (good grief) and a lifting Pedigree gives Van Dam the same. Sabu is back up with some kicks into a slingshot legdrop for two of his own as they’re somehow getting even slower. A split legged moonsault gets two, as does Sabu’s Arabian press…and time expires at 30:02 (close enough).

Rating: C-. There were some great spots in there, but it was ridiculous to see the two of them kicking out time after time. It was cool to see them doing their stuff, even with Sabu’s usual sloppiness, but they were really dragging near the end and spent far too much of the match selling. I liked the idea of Alfonso calling it right down the line and wanting to leave with the champion, but that wasn’t enough to overcome the annoying aspects here.

Post match they seem to be ok.

Overall Rating: B. As usual it’s hard to give this an overall rating as it’s not meant to be a regular show, but with some actual rarities and two classics, I’ll definitely take this one as an entertaining set. Granted it helped that I picked the matches included, but it was mostly good stuff. As usual, the WWE Vault is one of the best things going in wrestling today and hopefully that continues for a long time to come.

 

 

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Royal Rumble 1991 (2026 Edition): And I Thought I Was Being Mean This Time

Royal Rumble 1991
Date: January 19, 1991
Location: Miami Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 16,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Roddy Piper

It’s been a minute (or about eleven years) since I’ve done this show so we might as well take advantage of it being uploaded. It’s the height of the WWF using the Gulf War as a top story, which is why the evil Sgt. Slaughter is getting the WWF Title shot against the Ultimate Warrior. And there’s that whole Royal Rumble thing. Let’s get to it.

We open with a shot of a massive American flag because it’s going to be one of those shows. This takes us to the Star Spangled Banner.

The opening video hypes up some potential Royal Rumble winner, though thankfully we do hear about the rest of the card.

Roddy Piper gives quite the promo about how much he cares for the military.

Orient Express vs. Rockers

Mr. Fuji is here with the Express (Tanaka/Kato version), who jump the Rockers to start but are quickly cleared out. The Rockers go up so Kato pulls Tanaka to the floor, meaning it’s time for stereo suicide dives (a really big spot back in the day). We settle down to Jannetty headlocking Kato down, which doesn’t last long.

Instead Kato takes him into the corner, where Jannetty’s leapfrog leaves the Express crashing into each other. Michaels comes in to start on the arm but Tanaka is back up with a leg lariat. The chinlock keeps Michaels down, which doesn’t last long either as he’s on his feet for the jumping knee. Now it’s Michaels grabbing his own chinlock, followed by a sleeper to mix it up a bit.

That doesn’t last very long and everything breaks down, with the Express actually getting the better of a do-see-do. The Rockers backflip out though and stereo dropkicks have the Express on the floor. The big planchas take them out again and it’s a double back elbow for two on Kato. Jannetty slaps on the chinlock for a bit before handing it back to Michaels, who is taken into the wrong corner.

The nerve hold goes on for a good while before a double clothesline gives Tanaka two. Michaels kicks Tanaka down so the Express tries to use their belt…which Michaels dives onto sent them into each other. See he’s not just good, but he’s smart. Jannetty comes in to clean house, even with some not great dropkicks.

Everything breaks down and Tanaka kicks Jannetty into a backslide for two as we slow back down. Michaels trips Kato down for two but Jannetty gets catapulted into a chop. Back up and the catapult is loaded up again but Michaels makes a save, allowing Jannetty to sunset flip Tanaka for the pin at 19:13.

Rating: B. Good stuff here, with the Rockers getting to show just how talented they really were. Their eventual split is what gets the attention but they could do some great stuff in the ring as well. It’s nice to see a match like this getting some time and it made for an awesome opener. Throw in the underrated Express getting their chance to showcase themselves and it made for a heck of an opener.

Randy Savage says he’s the best WWF Champion of all time and it’s time for Queen Sherri to bait the Ultimate Warrior into giving Savage a title shot.

We go to the arena where Gene Okerlund is on the platform with Sherri, who wants to challenge the Ultimate Warrior. She knows Sgt. Slaughter would give Randy Savage a title shot because he’s brave, but she’s not sure in Warrior’s case. Sherri calls Warrior out for a chat but he won’t say anything about the challenge. She then talks about his lips, chest and hair while walking around him.

With that not working, she opens his jacket and kneels before him, asking if Warrior will be honorable and a great champion by giving Savage a title shot. Warrior starts shaking and screams NO in her face and we cut to the back where Savage is livid and swears revenge. He runs into the arena but Warrior is gone. This segment has always been kind of cringey and that was the feeling again here.

Big Boss Man vs. Barbarian

This is part of Boss Man’s march through the Heenan Family (meaning Bobby Heenan is here too) to get revenge on Heenan himself. Barbarian bails to the floor to start and walks around a bit, getting inside for the lockup about 1:45 in. Boss Man boots him in the face and hits an elbow which has Barbarian out on the floor and Boss Man spinning in circles. You can criticize Boss Man about a few things, but in this era, he was never phoning it in.

Back in and Barbarian gets in a shot to go up top, only for Boss Man to knock him out of the air. A Cactus Clothesline sends Barbarian outside for another breather, with Boss Man rather fired up (shocking I know). Back in and Barbarian muscles him up with a suplex and hits a clothesline as commentary talks about how strong these two really are. Well, yeah, they’re power wrestlers.

They head outside, with Boss Man’s back being sent into the post to leave him down for a bit. Even Heenan can get in a few shots before Boss Man is sent inside for a bearhug. The comeback doesn’t last long as the bearhug goes right back on. Boss Man fights out again and manages a knockdown to get a bit of a break.

A clothesline gives Boss Man two as the foot is on the rope, meaning it’s a collision to leave them both down again. Barbarian gets up top for the clothesline but walks into the Boss Man Slam….for two, as he gets a hand on the rope. Boss Man is knocked back again so Barbarian goes up for a high crossbody, with Boss Man rolling through for the pin at 14:15.

Rating: C+. Boss Man was doing some of his best work around this point and it was interesting to see him face someone who could match him with power. This was just another step in the Heenan Family story for Boss Man and that’s not a bad way to go. The fans were behind him here and that isn’t a surprise given the effort he was putting in every time he was out there.

Sgt. Slaughter and General Adnan promise to create even more turmoil. The people here need a leader and he will provide that, as Ultimate Warrior’s time as champion is no longer even measured in hours.

Ultimate Warrior isn’t so convinced.

WWF Title: Sgt. Slaughter vs. Ultimate Warrior

Slaughter, with General Adnan, is challenging and Piper goes off about the love of the military again. A cheap shot with the flag pole doesn’t work as Warrior knocks Slaughter outside and rips up the Iraqi flag, sending Piper into overdrive. The flag is shoved into Slaughter’s mouth (that isn’t sanitary) and there’s his big bump over the corner.

Cue Sherri to watch at ringside as Warrior sends him back inside for the running shoulders. Sherri trips the leg so the chase is on, with Savage jumping Warrior near the entrance. A shot with a light stand leaves Warrior down and he takes his sweet time getting back to the ring. Thankfully Slaughter is smart enough to keep breaking up the count, as otherwise he can’t win the title.

Back in and Slaughter hits a backbreaker and spits on him before sending Warrior face first into the curled boot. A double clothesline gives them a double breather, with Slaughter popping up first…and falling right back down. Warrior gets up as well and walks right into a bearhug. That’s broken up so Slaughter drops him again, this time for the camel clutch. The feet are underneath the ropes though and Warrior starts another comeback, only to have to pull in the invading Sherri. Cue Savage with the scepter to shatter it over the Warrior’s head (because this referee is blind), giving Slaughter the pin and the title at 12:45.

Rating: C. They had to do it. Slaughter was the top heel in the company, but more importantly, Warrior just wasn’t clicking as champion. It was clear that there was nothing going on there and while you could put part of that on things beyond Warrior’s control (Hogan still being around), he wasn’t working in the spot. Yeah the result is there to set up Hogan triumphing for America, but what choice did they have?

Warrior chases after Savage and Slaughter is announced as champion, sending Monsoon and Piper into some awesome rants about how he didn’t earn it.

The Mountie vs. Koko B. Ware

Jimmy Hart is here with Mountie. They start slowly with Ware chasing him out to the floor, meaning it’s time to hit the stall button. Back in and Ware takes him down by the arm and cranks away, earning himself a right hand. Mountie avoids a charge and sends him out to the floor, followed by what looks like a claw back inside. Naturally Hart goes over to mock Frankie the bird, because Hart is amazing.

The piledriver is loaded up but Ware backdrops his way to freedom. Ware fights back and hits the missile dropkick (sticking the landing of course) but he makes the mistake of going after Hart. The distraction lets Mountie grab something like a chokeslam (uh, ok then) for the pin at 9:12.

Rating: C-. This was the filleriest of filler matches you could ask for, with pretty much nothing of note happening, saves for Ware’s always awesome dropkick. That being said, Hart yelling at Frankie was one of the best things I’ve seen in a long time, as Hart was always fine with looking goofy. Somehow, Mountie would be Intercontinental Champion a year later. The biggest surprise? The gimmick lasted for A YEAR.

Randy Savage isn’t sorry for costing Ultimate Warrior the title. Then he and Sherri run away at the sound of someone at the door.

Sgt. Slaughter and General Adnan are proud of their victory because they told you so. Unlike the rest of the military, he has no boundaries. We must be in intermission.

Piper goes on another rant about Slaughter. If there was a February PPV, Piper getting a title shot would have been ALL the money.

Jake Roberts, Earthquake, Greg Valentine, the Texas Tornado, the Legion Of Doom, Undertaker (with Brother Love), Jim Duggan, Rick Martel, Mr. Perfect and Tugboat are ready for the Royal Rumble.

Roddy Piper doesn’t think much of Virgil being Ted DiBiase’s servant.

DiBiase says Virgil does everything for him for the almighty dollar. Virgil looks ready to kill him.

Ted DiBiase/Virgil vs. Dusty Rhodes/Dustin Rhodes

No polka dots for Dusty here. The villains are cleared out to start and DiBiase tells Virgil to go take them out. Back in and Dustin takes over on Virgil without much trouble, followed by a clothesline out to the floor. Virgil gets sent outside again and now DiBiase is willing to do it himself. That means taking over on Dustin, so it’s quickly off to Dusty for the elbows in the corner.

The sleeper has DiBiase in more trouble so Virgil has to make a save. Dustin comes back in and gets his knee taken out, allowing Virgil to actually take over for once. DiBiase wraps the knee around the post and it’s time for some double teaming…but Virgil clotheslines DiBiase by mistake. That’s too much for DiBiase, who beats Virgil up and sends him outside, only for Dusty to miss a charge and get rolled up (with trunks) for the pin at 9:58.

Rating: C. The match was pretty much just a backdrop for Virgil finally having enough of DiBiase, to the point where it got physical between them. They had a great run but you had to do the turn at some point and this made sense. At the same time, this was pretty much it for Dusty and Dustin, with the former heading back to (kind of) run WCW, where he was much better suited.

Post match DiBiase berates Virgil again and orders him to put the Million Dollar Title around his waist. Instead, Virgil throws it down, with DiBiase telling him to pick it up. Virgil does so, and blasts him with the belt for the big turn and monster pop. And then after Wrestlemania, they never could follow up on it.

Hulk Hogan promises to win the Royal Rumble for the troops. We’re told that Sgt. Slaughter is planning to deface the American flag and you might as well just make Wrestlemania right now. Then Hogan forgets Sadaam Hussein’s name and the whole thing goes off the rails.

Royal Rumble

Two minute intervals and Bret Hart is in at #1 (second time in four years) and Dino Bravo is in at #2. Piper does his job as a commentator and makes sure to go over the rules (remember that this is only the third time with the 30 man variety so it was still pretty new) as Hart takes over with an early atomic drop. Bravo knocks him down and starts stomping away but misses the elbow as Greg Valentine is in at #3. Valentine goes after Bravo as we’re still in his bizarre face run. That works as well as…well as well as Valentine’s face turn, though he does toss Bravo out.

Hart goes to toss Valentine out but it’s Paul Roma in at #4 (with Slick running after him for a weird visual) to break it up. The three slug it out until Kerry Von Erich is in at #5, giving us a tag match which would leave Hart wondering what in the world he’s supposed to do. They pair off for a bit until Rick Martel is in at #6. That means more general brawling until Saba Simba is in at #7 to add some muscle.

Even more brawling ensues with no one even getting close to an elimination until Butch is in at #8. Martel dumps Simba to clear the ring out a bit and it’s Jake Roberts (who cannot stand Martel) in at #9 to go right after him to a huge reaction. The short arm clothesline sends Martel under the ropes to the floor, with Valentine cutting Roberts off on the way back inside. Roberts can’t quite knock Martel off the apron and it’s Hercules in at #10. That gives us Hart, Valentine, Roma, Von Erich, Martel, Butch, Roberts and Hercules for rather unique midcard lineup.

That means more standing around on the ropes and brawling until Tito Santana is in at #11. Roma misses a charge and crashes out to the floor and Von Erich grabs a Claw on I believe Hercules. Undertaker is in at #12 and immediately gets rid of Hart before doing the scary faced choking. Jimmy Snuka (with his crazy afro) is in at #13 and Undertaker tosses Butch as they’re doing a better job of keeping things moving. Davey Boy Smith is in at #14 and the ring is starting to get full.

There’s nothing else going on at the moment so we’ll stop to look at fans who realize they can get on TV near the front row, leaving the security guard to clear them out. There’s nothing in particular about these fans, but it’s talking about them or talking about Hercules and Von Erich in the Royal Rumble. Smash is in at #15 and the nothing continues. Roberts is tossed out and Hawk is in at #16, with a bunch of people going after him.

That’s broken up and it’s Shane Douglas (looking like Brian Pillman) in at #17. Von Erich and Snuka are out back to back and #18….is no one, as nobody comes through the curtain. More on this later so we’ll go with Undertaker hitting Smith low without doing much damage. The person who didn’t enter is officially eliminated and Animal is in at #19. The LOD gets rid of Undertaker but Hawk is thrown out as well, with Crush coming in at #20.

That gives us Valentine, Martel, Hercules, Santana, Bulldog, Smash, Douglas, Animal and Crush. Demolition double teams the Bulldog and Jim Duggan is in at #21. Animal’s bearhug on Martel doesn’t last long and it’s Earthquake in at #22. Animal fires off some running clotheslines but misses a charge and gets dumped. Mr. Perfect is in at #23 and takes a heck of a bump off Duggan’s whip into the corner. It might not make sense from a physics standpoint but it looked good. Duggan’s missed charge puts him out as well and none of that matters as Hulk Hogan is in at #24.

A bunch of people jump him but Smash is the first one out. Some right hands rock Earthquake but Perfect comes over to cut Hogan off. Smith makes a save of his own and it’s Haku in at #25. Hogan tosses Valentine to little fanfare after almost 45 minutes and Jim Neidhart is in at #26. Santana is out and Luke it in at #27, lasting a then record 4 seconds before marching right back to the back (and it’s still funny).

Brian Knobbs is in at #28 and things are slowing down a big. Hogan sends Perfect into the corner, likely jealous over Perfect wearing the yellow singlet. Knobbs actually tosses Hercules and it’s Warlord in at #29. Hogan tosses Crush and gets pummeled by Knobbs, with Perfect coming over to help. Perfect chops Warlord by mistake so Hogan is back over to go after Warlord as well. A clothesline gets rid of Warlord and it’s Tugboat to complete the field (meaning Randy Savage was #18 who didn’t show up, likely out of fear of the Ultimate Warrior).

We have a final grouping of Martel, Bulldog, Douglas, Earthquake, Perfect, Hogan, Haku, Neidhart, Knobbs and Tugboat, which isn’t exactly great. Douglas is tossed and Tugboat actually splashes Hogan in the corner, which is good for a toss to the apron. Back up and Hogan dumps Tugboat, which is actually deserved for once. Bulldog dropkicks Perfect out and Martel actually dumps Neidhart.

Bulldog backdrops Haku out as the ring is clearing in a hurry. That leaves us with five, as Martel goes up, which just seems dump. Bulldog crotches him on top and hits a clothesline, leaving us with Bulldog, Hogan, Earthquake and Knobbs. Earthquake and Knobbs get rid of Bulldog and Earthquake splashes Hogan, which means it’s time to celebrate.

The Earthquake crushes Hogan, who pops up and kicks Knobbs out without much trouble. The big boot drops Earthquake and Jimmy Hart’s interference is easily cut off. Hogan tries a slam but Earthquake falls on top of him and the big elbow crushes Hogan again. Earthquake powerslams Hogan, which triggers the Hulk Up. Hogan hits the slam and knocks him out to win at 1:05:18.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t exactly a thrilling Rumble, but it was best known as the one where Brian Knobbs was there at the end. What else do you really need to know about it? The last two years have ended with Hogan facing a pair of villains. Last year it was Rick Rude and Mr. Perfect, while this year it was Earthquake and Knobbs. There were a few ok parts to the match, but Hogan had to win after the big soul crushing loss from Warrior. They were still figuring out the Rumble formula here and this didn’t work very well.

Hogan poses a lot, including holding a bunch of signs to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. It was not a good time for the WWF and this show was a good illustration of why. You had a good opener, but the rest of the show is just totally mediocre, with something of a transition from the Golden Era taking place. Things wouldn’t get much better anytime soon, though Savage vs. Warrior would be rather excellent. Unfortunately that didn’t happen here, as instead we got a bunch of matches which were just kind of there, plus the good opener. Skip this one, as you probably have.

Ratings Comparison

The Rockers vs. The Orient Express

Original: A
2013 Redo: B+
2026 Redo: B

Big Boss Man vs. Barbarian

Original: B
2013 Redo: C
2026 Redo: C+

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Ultimate Warrior

Original: D
2013 Redo: D+
2026 Redo: C

The Mountie vs. Koko B. Ware

Original: D
2013 Redo: D
2026 Redo: C-

Ted DiBiase/Virgil vs. Dustin Rhodes/Dusty Rhodes

Original: B
2013 Redo: D+
2026 Redo: C

Royal Rumble

Original: D+
2013 Redo: D
2026 Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: C-
2013 Redo: D+
2026 Redo: C-

Geez and I thought I was being harsh on the show this time.

 

 

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WWE Vault: Christmas Carnage: Like A Big Stocking (Includes Full Video)

Christmas Carnage
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jim Ross, Vince McMahon, Mr. Perfect, Michael Hayes, Bobby Heenan, Jerry Lawler

This is the Christmas week contribution from the WWE Vault and that could have some possibilities. WWE has often done something over Christmas and it should be interesting to see what they have brought out of mothballs. There are quite a few options here and some of them are worth a look so let’s get to it.

From Smackdown, December 22, 2006.

Batista is in the ring and Santa Claus comes out with gifts for the fans. Michael Cole even gets a Roddy Piper DVD and shirt (not shown, but that’s what someone with notes from Smackdown from 2006 are for)…but then Santa hits Batista in his bad arm with a pipe. Cue Teddy Long to give Santa a match with Batista.

Batista vs. Santa Claus

Batista’s World Title isn’t on the line and Long might not be the nicest guy to have Batista in the match when he’s already hurt. Santa goes after the bad arm and slams it into the apron for two. Batista drives him into the corner but charges into a boot to the bad arm. A backdrop (looked like a mistimed spinebuster) sets up a spear and the beard comes off to reveal…Sylvan. The spinebuster and Batista Bomb finish at 1:41.

From Superstars, December 23, 1995.

Xanta Klaus vs. Scott Taylor

Yeah this had to be here. Xanta is better known as Balls Mahoney, is from the South Pole, and likes to steal presents. Some hard forearms, a belly to back suplex, and a camel clutch finish for Xanta at 1:31. The match was so short that I didn’t have time to mention Xanta’s manager, Ted DiBiase, doing a split screen interview and promising that the Million Dollar Champion is coming. This was the only match for Xanta, because….well how much of a shelf life was he going to have?

From Monday Night Raw, December 20, 1999.

Mankind is not happy about having to face Santa Claus in a Boiler Room Brawl because he doesn’t want to have to punch the rosy cheeks or kick him in the stomach that shakes like a bowlful of jelly. Cue the Mean Street Posse to jump him and send him into the boiler room, which has him rather disturbed to officially start things off.

Mankind vs. Santa Claus

Santa is in fact in the boiler room and Mankind isn’t sure what to do about this. Santa doesn’t want to put Mankind on the bad list so Mankind offers to let Santa walk out and win in peace. That works for Santa but three other Santas jump Mankind. He’s fine with fighting them and finds a well placed garbage can and some frying pants (in their bag of toys).

The three of them are down but two more are waiting on him and these two happen to be the New Age Outlaws, who have some better luck. Mankind fights back against the two of them like he’s in Championship Mode in No Mercy (SOCKO!) and grabs a mirror, naturally singing about chestnuts roasting on an open fire in the process. Another Santa knocks the mirror into his face to shatter it…and since it’s HHH, he tells Mankind to suck it and leaves to win at 3:34.

Rating: C. What in the world do you want me to say about this? It felt like some weird comic book scene with the collection of Santas coming at Mankind, who was almost fighting his nightmare scenario come to life. Like so much from this era, it wasn’t so much a match as a segment with brawling, but this did work for what it was supposed to be.

From Monday Night Raw, December 23, 2012.

Good Santa vs. Bad Santa

YES! This is the one I was hoping would be on here. Here we have a 400lb wig splitting World’s Strongest Santa vs. the Intellectual Santa of the Masses in a battle to save Christmas. The good one hits the bad one in the head to start and opens a package to find a toilet. Bad Santa goes face first into said toilet and they head outside, where the bad one finds a fire extinguisher….which doesn’t work.

The good one takes the pin out and sprays the bad one as commentary argues over whether Santa’s suit is fireproof or Santa himself. The bad one finds a Singapore candy cane to beat on the good one and wreck the (awesome) Christmas decorations, which is just too far for the good one. They fight back to ringside, with the bad one taking a present to the back. The bad one STILL can’t get the fire extinguisher to work so the good one sprays him again, setting up the World’s Strongest Slam (which Cole dubs the Sleigh Ride) for the pin at 3:20.

Rating: A+. I’m a Christmas fanatic and I remember loving this match live. It still holds up today as they absolutely knew the assignment and had a comedy brawl which didn’t overstay its welcome. That’s exactly what wrestling should be at times and it worked very well, with Henry being lovable and Sandow being the snob. Great stuff.

Post match Henry pulls out some cupcakes (he approves) and slams them into Sandow’s face. JBL: “Jimmy Stewart is rolling over in his grave right now.”

From Monday Night Raw, December 23, 2019.

We’re near the streets of New York City, where Santa Claus sends R-Truth over to his sled and then jumps Akira Tozawa to win the 24/7 Title. Of note: Santa was played by future AEW star Bear Bronson.

From Wrestling Challenge, November 27, 1993.

Doink The Clown is brought out for an interview, where he is told that there can only be ONE Doink in the WWF. Apparently he has drawn the ire of Bam Bam Bigelow and Luna Vachon, but he doesn’t care because he loves Christmas. Cue Santa Claus to hug Doink, who started off badly but has gotten a lot better. His present is in the bag, and it’s……a mini Doink! Actually that won’t work, as there can only be ONE Doink….so we’ll just call him Dink! Yeah sure why not. Dink leaves in a wagon and Heenan hopes he goes to play on the interstate.

From a Superstars taping in what looks like late 1992.

We meet Santa’s helpers from the South Pole: a couple of guys who whack their arms around and call each other Cousin Luke and Cousin Butch. They seem to love Christmas and remember their mother singing them Christmas songs (if they’re cousins, why do they have the same…..never mind). The interviewer is licked and toys are dispensed to the fans.

From World Class Championship Wrestling, December 25, 1983.

Michael Hayes dresses up like Santa and jumps the Von Erichs after a tag match. Mike Von Erich gets piledriven.

Overall Rating: B. Again, I love it when they throw in a few curves here and there with some actual interesting moments. Rather than doing a bunch of lame stuff that doesn’t matter, they went with stuff that a lot of fans probably haven’t thought of in a long time and it makes these things so much more fun. I love the Henry vs. Sandow match and the Mankind deal was a nice flashback. This could have been a lot longer but at just shy of thirty minutes, it’s hard to get too annoyed.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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No Mercy 2008 (2025 Edition): Those Guys Are Really Good

No Mercy 2008
Date: October 5, 2008
Location: Rose Garden, Portland, Oregon
Attendance: 9,527
Commentators: Todd Grisham, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Jim Ross

This is a rather top heavy show with a double main event of Shawn Michaels challenging Chris Jericho for the Raw World Title in a ladder match and HHH defending the Smackdown World Title against Jeff Hardy. While there is quite the gap between those matches as Jericho vs. Michaels is the undisputed real main event, there is also quite the gap down to the next big match, which is….I guess Big Show vs. Undertaker? Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at a family in a stereotypical 1950s house where they’re said to have no problems and no worries, but also no mercy. That’s quite the stretch for an opening video theme but it switches into the usual opening montage. Then it cuts back to the family watching the show. Yeah that’s not their best work.

Special treat: Matt Striker isn’t here and Jerry Lawler is taking his place. Things are looking up! Well sounding up!

Mark Henry, Matt Hardy, Tony Atlas

IMG Credit: WWE

ECW Title: Matt Hardy vs. Mark Henry

Henry, with Tony Atlas, is challenging after losing the title in a Championship Scramble last month and wanting his one on one rematch. Hardy gets powered into the corner to start and realizes he needs another idea. A headlock doesn’t work and Henry drops him with a shoulder. Henry backs Hardy into the corner for a knee to the ribs, followed by a rather hard clothesline.

Hardy goes after the knee and grabs a Robinsdale Crunch, followed by a cannonball down onto said leg. They go outside where Henry gets simple with Henry just shoving him down in a heap. A big boot drops Hardy for two and Henry drops down onto him for the same. The neck crank goes on for a bit, followed by a bearhug as Henry keeps going with the basic stuff (as he should).

Hardy fights out and tries a sunset flip for some reason, only to avoid a sitdown splash, banging up the knee again. The middle rope elbow to the back of the head into the Side Effect gets two but Henry runs him over again. The splash connects but Henry’s knee is in bad shape. Henry’s World’s Strongest Slam is broken up with a few shots to the leg and the Twist Of Fate retains the title at 8:02.

Rating: B-. It was a nice story with Hardy fighting through the monster and winning in the end after cutting Henry down. If Hardy was going to become the top star in ECW, he had to beat Henry one on one at some point and they made it work here. It was a good David vs. Goliath story, which still works if it’s done right and that was the case.

HHH and Jeff Hardy meet in the back but HHH is more interested in the mobile poll about who will win their match. Hardy wants some respect so HHH says he wants Hardy at his best. That way when HHH beats him tonight, he beats the best Hardy possible. Hardy promises to take the title.

Raw Women’s Title: Beth Phoenix vs. Candice Michelle

Phoenix is defending and has Santino Marella with him. Michelle kicks the leg out to start and hits a quick Fameasser, followed by a rollup for two. An enziguri staggers Phoenix again but she powers Michelle into the corner. Phoenix starts in on the arm and sends it into the buckle, setting up an arm crank. Michelle manages to slip out and slugs away, including a spinwheel kick (which didn’t seem to connect) for two.

Phoenix is right back with a DDT on the arm before going up (you don’t see that every day), where Michelle crotches her down just as fast. Marella has to make the save, allowing Phoenix to drop Michelle with a clothesline on the floor. Back in and Michelle is in trouble but Marella accidentally trips Phoenix for two. The Candy Wrapper is loaded up but Phoenix reverses into the Glam Slam to retain at 4:41.

Rating: C+. They didn’t have time, but there was something to Michelle giving Phoenix everything she could until the ending. At the end of the day though, Phoenix is likely going to smash through someone like Michelle, who was still figuring out a lot of stuff in the ring. Phoenix winning makes a lot more sense and it came after a better match than I was expecting.

Kane is ready to take Rey Mysterio’s mask and the facade that it represents. Then Mysterio and all of the people will see themselves as the monsters they really are.

Kane vs. Rey Mysterio

Kane has been going after Mysterio because he doesn’t like him wearing a mask. Thanks to a favor from Mike Adamle, Mysterio has to unmask if he loses. Mysterio goes with the kicks to start and knocks Kane outside, only to get booted in the face without much trouble. A dropkick looks to set up the 619 so Kane drops him with a hard clothesline. Mysterio is able to slip off Kane’s shoulder for a headscissors out to the floor. That’s fine with Kane, who sends him crashing into the barricade.

The chinlock goes on back inside, followed by a backbreaker with Mysterio being bent over Kane’s knee. With that broken up, Mysterio manages a spinning reverse DDT, plus a top rope standing moonsault press for two. Dropping The Time gives Mysterio two but he walks into a side slam. Another spinning DDT gives Mysterio a desperation two and he avoids a big boot in the corner. The 619 to the back puts Kane on the floor and Mysterio goes up, only to dive into a chair shot for the DQ (that looked GREAT) at 10:10.

Rating: B. The ending fits as Kane more about the violence and pain than anything else so having him do something that got him disqualified makes perfect sense. It helps that Mysterio got knocked absolutely silly by that chair shot and Kane looked happy with hurting him more than anything else. Good stuff here as Mysterio was trying to survive, though I could go with something other than a smaller hero fighting a powerhouse after seeing it three straight times.

MVP is annoyed at not having a match tonight and goes to knock on the Smackdown GM’s door. Instead of Vickie Guerrero, he finds Big Show, who isn’t interested in MVP’s problems. MVP keeps complaining but Show threatens to switch his focus from Undertaker to him. Guerrero calls Show into the office and MVP leaves.

Here is MVP in the arena for a chat. MVP doesn’t get why he’s being left on the sidelines for such a big event. Maybe being dropped on her head has messed with Vickie Guerrero’s mind…and here is Randy Orton to interrupt. Orton introduces himself and says he is what MVP believes himself to be. This seems to happen to MVP every month but MVP says he didn’t recognize Orton without his shoulder in a sling.

MVP says he never gets the ball, though Orton says if MVP ever got the ball, he would just drop it. Violence is teased but here are Ted DiBiase, Cody Rhodes and Manu to interrupt. Rhodes tries to talk to Orton, only to be cut off by a BORING chant. Rhodes sees Orton as the guy who was a big deal in high school but didn’t get into college and just stays around town, trying to be cool.

Orton brings up attacking CM Punk, which Manu says only happened after they did the hard work. Orton says that he’ll listen to them as soon as they’ve done half of what he does. MVP mocks Orton for walking out and praises the trio’s style. If he ever winds up on Raw, maybe they could do something. DiBiase doesn’t buy this because MVP’s dad wasn’t a star. MVP says he makes more money than all of them. DiBiase: “Hey genius. My father is the Million Dollar Man.”

Violence is teased again and MVP just leaves…but here are CM Punk and Kofi Kingston to interrupt. They talk to MVP, who seems interested in teaming up with them to go after the trio. The three of them charge the ring…but Punk and Kingston stay outside and let MVP get triple teamed. Then Punk and Kingston get in and make the save, leaving commentary a bit confused.

This has been your regularly scheduled fifteen minute detour from the regularly scheduled card.

Batista, JBL

IMG Credit: WWE

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Batista

For a future Raw World Title shot and JBL is all depressed because he’s lost a lot of money in the stock market this week. Batista clotheslines him down and hits a running boot for an early two. JBL fights back and is speared outside in a heap as his slow start continues. They fight outside with JBL getting in a few right hands, followed by an elbow back inside. We hit the chinlock for a bit but Batista suplexes his way to freedom. Some clotheslines stagger JBL again and it’s off to the shoulders in the corner. The spinebuster and Batista Bomb finish JBL at 5:18.

Rating: B-. You know, I’ll take this over what could have been. I’ve seen enough of JBL and Batista having long, drawn out matches before and it’s not a pleasant experience. It’s nice to see them do a near squash match as no one bought JBL having a chance in the match anyway. Just do the simpler version for a change.

Post match Batista leaves and JBL talks about how bad his week has been. The reality is his heart wasn’t in this one tonight because Wall Street has given him the worst week of his life. After everything else though, he is the happiest man alive because Congress has bailed out people like him.

People like Barney Frank and Nancy Pelosi (members of Congress) understand that people like him make the world go around. Sure it may cost families $10,000 per household, but now he gets to keep his penthouse apartment at Central Park. Now he’s going to get in his limo and go back to New York. God bless you, God bless America, and God bless him! Cue Cryme Tyme on the Titantron, saying they’re going to bail out the limo, complete with the Divas and….Sgt. Slaughter, who apparently is just kept in storage in Portland until he’s needed! This was hilarious, with JBL’s promo being absolutely great.

We recap Undertaker vs. Big Show. Undertaker has been going after Vickie Guerrero, who apparently has Show in her back pocket. Show attacked Undertaker, who wants revenge, setting up the match. The build for this has involved showing the video of Show knocking Undertaker out approximately 4123 times.

Undertaker vs. Big Show

Undertaker slugs away to start and gets knocked outside but comes back with a headbutt. The Stunner over the top rope staggers Show, who is right back up to take Undertaker outside. The big right hands have Undertaker in trouble and Show whips him hard into the barricade. Show gets posted though and it’s the apron legdrop as JR thinks Show is in a hopeless state. Oregon is hopeless?

Undertaker’s big boot doesn’t do much to Show, who runs Undertaker over with a rather hard clothesline. Show slowly hammers away but misses a Vader Bomb, allowing Undertaker to come back with the right hands. The jumping clothesline drops Show and a legdrop gets two.

Old School is countered into a good looking chokeslam for two but another chokeslam is countered into a DDT for a delayed near fall. The turnbuckle pad is ripped off and Show sends him into the exposed buckle, followed by the KO Punch. Another KO sets up a third to the back of the head and the referee stops it at 10:05.

Rating: B. This was a shockingly good brawl as they beat the living daylights out of each other until even Undertaker couldn’t survive Show. That’s a heck of a lot better than I was expecting after the really dull build. Odds are it sets up a big gimmick match next month and if it’s like this, I have heard far worse ideas. Very nice surprise here.

Jeff Hardy wins the text poll 72%-28%. That’s a heck of a landslide.

We recap HHH defending the Smackdown World Title against Jeff Hardy. The idea is very simple: Hardy feels like the unstoppable force on the way to the title but HHH is a heck of a champion. Hardy keeps getting closer and closer and it feels like when rather than if he wins the title.

Triple H, Jeff Hardy

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Jeff Hardy

HHH is defending and we get a handshake before the bell, but HHH jumps him from behind. Hardy grabs a headlock but gets reversed into a headscissors, meaning it’s time to go back to the headlock. The grinding doesn’t keep HHH down long as he’s back up with an elbow to the face. Hardy sends him outside for an apron clothesline, followed by a slingshot legdrop and another headlock takeover.

HHH is back up and tries the Pedigree but gets backdropped out to the floor for the big crash. The big flip dive misses though and Hardy’s back is banged up. Back in and a backbreaker sets up some elbows to said back, followed by the abdominal stretch. The referee catches HHH holding the rope though and it’s off to the sleeper. That’s broken up as well and Hardy hits a running sleeper drop.

A basement dropkick gives Hardy two and he sends HHH outside for the big flip dive. Back in and the Twist Of Fate is countered into a heck of a clothesline to give HHH two of his own. For some reason HHH goes up, only to dive into a sitout gordbuster for two more as the fans are getting even more into this.

The spinning middle rope crossbody is slammed out of the air to give HHH two more but he gets catapulted into the corner. Hardy’s Whisper In The Wind gets two more as they’re going back and forth with the counts getting closer and closer. The Swanton misses but Hardy is right back with the Twist Of Fate. The Swanton connects…but Hardy lays back on him and gets rolled up for the pin to retain the title at 17:02.

Rating: B+. This was turning into a slugfest at the end as they were going move for move with each other until Hardy hit his big move. It’s Hardy somehow getting one step closer to the title but not being able to get there, even with the fans being along with him every step of the way. I was only kind of interested in this match coming in and they had me totally hooked by about the halfway point. Awesome match here, as these two had some very good chemistry.

Post match Hardy is devastated but they shake hands. HHH heads to the back, where he is congratulated by Arn Anderson and Vladimir Kozlov. One of these is interesting while the other is Russian.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels for the Raw World Title. They had been having the feud of the year and then Jericho won the title, the same night Michaels had beat him. You put one and one together and throw in a ladder and you have a nearly guaranteed awesome match.

Shawn Michaels, Chris Jericho

IMG Credit: WWE

Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is defending in a ladder match. Michaels grabs a headlock to start fast before threatening a superkick. Jericho is back to cut Michaels off from getting the ladder and sends him into the post. The ladder is pulled towards the ring but Michaels hits a drop toehold into the ladder onto the floor. That earns Michaels a Walls Of Jericho on the floor and the ladder is brought inside, where it is teeter tottered into Jericho’s face.

Back in and Jericho tries the Walls again but winds up catapulting Michaels onto the ladder. Said ladder is turned over though and Michaels goes crashing into the rope. Jericho’s face is busted open as he hits Michaels in the ribs with a ladder. Another ladder is brought in but Michaels gets in a shot of his own. Jericho gets dropped knee first onto the ladder and the Figure Four goes on.

With that broken up, Jericho kicks a ladder around to send it into Michaels’ face for a nasty crash. Another catapult sends Michaels face first into the ladder and Jericho puts him in said ladder for something of a Ladderairto. The ladder is sat on the top rope but Jericho gets sent into it, sending him crashing out to the floor. Michaels throws the ladder down onto him, as he would rather hurt Jericho rather than win the title. It’s time for the big ladder (uh oh) on the floor and Michaels loads up the announcers’ table (uh oh again).

Michaels takes too long going up and Jericho catches him with a belly to back superplex…but Michaels turns on it for the crossbody through the table and the massive crash. They slowly get back up and Michaels heads up top with a ladder, which is dropkicked into him for the crotching. Michaels is able to knock it down onto him though and the top rope elbow onto the ladder onto Jericho leaves them both laying. Sweet Chin Music is blocked with a ladder shot to the face (OUCH) and Michaels is down, setting up the Lionsault onto the ladder onto Michaels.

Jericho pins Michaels underneath the ladder and goes up but Michaels shoves the ladder over, sending Jericho WAY down onto the floor for a crazy crash. The slow climb is on, only to Jericho to knock the ladder (and Michaels) over again for a massive crash into the ropes. They both go up but Jericho gets knocked down, with his leg hanging in the ladder.

Cue Lance Cade to cut Michaels off so Michaels snaps off the superkick. Jericho is back up so Michaels goes to meet him on top and they grab the belt. The title comes unhooked as it’s a tug of war in the air but the bigger part is on Jericho’s side. Jericho is holding on with just the belt holding him up but manages to hit Michaels in the head and retain at 22:21.

Rating: A. This match had all of the stakes and build coming in and then they completely exceeded expectations. This was an absolute war as they beat the living daylights out of each other. It was a perfect mixture of being about the title and revenge, which made things that much better. Michaels is as good as it gets with making you believe that he might pull something off and he more than did it again here. I got pulled all the way into this again, which says a lot as I’ve seen it a few times now. Definitely check this out if you get the chance.

Overall Rating: A-. The worst match on the show is a five minute match between Beth Phoenix and Candice Michelle, which wound up being completely fine. The last two matches (and you could add in Big Show vs. Undertaker) are absolutely great, with the main event being an instant classic. It’s one of the better WWE shows in a very long time and is more than worth a look if you’re looking for something from this era. Great show.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – September 29, 2008: The Weaker Half

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 29, 2008
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the last Raw before No Mercy and hopefully that means a lot more from Chris Jericho and Shawn Michaels. The two of them have done some great stuff lately and are carrying the show on their backs. That’s about all there is going on around here and that can make for a tedious watch. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Batista vs. Santino Marella

Non-title and Beth Phoenix is here with Marella. Before the match, Marella wants the Honk-A-Meter, which shows that he’s 58 weeks behind Honky Tonk Man’s record. He also has the Brain Barometer, which shows he has ten trillion brain cells compared to Batista’s 12. Shoulders in the corner, spinebuster, Batista Bomb finish in less than a minute.

Post match Batista yells at Phoenix but JBL runs in to give him the Clothesline.

Shawn Michaels, who is teaming with a mystery partner tonight, says Chris Jericho has six days left to be World Heavyweight Champion. As for tonight, how about he teams up with a Real American? A Texas Rattlesnake? Or the Best There Is, The Best There Was And The Best There Ever Will Be? Ok Michaels knows that last one is too far so he’ll settle for someone who likes him.

Miz vs. JTG

Their respective partners are here too. After a quick look at the Dirt Sheet, which featured an interview with Cryme Tyme’s “parents”, Miz drives JTG into the corner to start but gets cut off by a flying shoulder. An uppercut staggers Miz again but he’s back with the running corner clothesline. A regular clothesline drops JTG again, though he’s right back with a jumping over the back Fameasser for two. John Morrison offers a distraction so Shad Gaspard cuts him off, which allows Miz to grab the Reality Check for the pin.

Rating: C. Miz is at the point where he just needs reps, as he’s so young in his career. The good thing is that you can see the development coming along each week, as he’s having competent matches. That’s a long way to come in such a short amount of time and his chemistry with Morrison makes it even better.

Jamie Noble goes up to Jillian Hall and insults her singing before asking “sweet cheeks” to be his partner tonight. She sings a no but gets to meet Dolph Ziggler, who doesn’t impress her.

Paul Burchill/Katie Lea vs. Jamie Noble/???

William Regal and Layla come out to watch and Noble actually has a partner in the form of….Mickie James. Yeah that works. Burchill hammers Noble down to start and hands it off to Katie, who can beat on Noble as well as this is an intergender match. That doesn’t last long as James comes in and gets caught with a double arm crank. James fights up just as quickly and hands it back to Noble, who shouts at Regal before missile dropkicking Burchill. A cross armbreaker gives Noble the fast submission.

Rating: C. The ending was a nice surprise as Noble seems to be turning to the good side. Granted he needs to work on his ability to speak to others but at least the stuff in the ring is working. The cross armbreaker is a good addition, as it certainly looks devastating enough. I can’t imagine he survives the showdown with Regal, but at least Noble is doing something well.

Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase and Manu find Kane (their partner tonight), with Rhodes saying that since Kane is Paul Bearer’s son, he’s basically a second generation star. That means they can work together, but Kane would rather massacre Rey Mysterio no matter who is on his side. Stay out of his way or he’ll end all of them.

We look back at last week, when Lance Cade beat Shawn Michaels, albeit thanks to a Chris Jericho distraction.

Here is Cade to brag about his win and say that Jericho is just better than Michaels. He doesn’t care who Michaels has as a partner tonight either.

Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase/Manu/Kane vs. CM Punk/Kofi Kingston/Rey Mysterio/Evan Bourne

Manu elbows Bourne in the face to start but Bourne slips out of a suplex attempt and brings in Mysterio. Everything breaks down early, with Punk and Kingston hitting stereo dives, followed by another dive from Mysterio as we take an early break. We come back with Bourne fighting out of Rhodes’ chinlock but Manu is in to keep Bourne down. That doesn’t last long though as Bourne is up for the tag off to Punk, who comes in with a clothesline.

Rhodes takes him down to start in on the knee though, with Kane coming in to just stomp on him. DiBiase, who seems to get the idea of a game plan, is back on the leg, followed by Rhodes doing the same. Kane comes in and gets enziguried but boots Mysterio off the apron. It doesn’t make much of a difference though as it’s Kingston getting the tag to start cleaning house. Kingston dives at Kane though and gets caught in the chokeslam for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. Pretty basic match here but it’s nice to see Kane going into monster mode to win in the end. He knows how to do that style well enough and Kingston is expendable enough to take a loss. That’s the point in putting so many people in this match as it gave them some options for taking the fall and it went well enough.

Here is Mike Adamle for a chat. Earlier tonight, Kane requested something from him and since he won, he gets his request: if Kane wins at No Mercy, Rey Mysterio will have to unmask. This brings out Randy Orton of all people to interrupt and he mocks Adamle for being Shane McMahon’s lackey. Adamle needs to re-suspend CM Punk right now because the reality is Adamle needs Orton on his side. He’s going to wreck everyone when he gets back but here is JBL to interrupt.

JBL complains about losing money on his stock market this week but he has a lot to lose. Then he’ll become #1 contender at No Mercy and move on to win the World Title. Orton is always living in the past because he’s the hottest commodity since ethanol. Cue Batista behind JBL, who realizes what’s waiting on him and turns around to eat the spear (well that was dumb). Batista promises to make JBL’s week worse at No Mercy.

Santino Marella is on the phone and gets nervous when he runs into Beth Phoenix. Apparently it was a sick kid named uh, Frankie! Phoenix doesn’t want him out there with her this week because she’s bad luck. Marella says it’s a good thing he doesn’t have a Moolah Meter, because Phoenix is trailing Moolah by about twenty two years. Phoenix is annoyed and leaves, with Marella thinking it was a “female problem”.

Kelly Kelly/Candice Michelle vs. Beth Phoenix/Jillian Hall

Phoenix and Michelle start things off but Kelly quickly comes in for a double dropkick. It’s off to Hall, who manages to pull Michelle face first down in the corner. Phoenix’s backbreaker gets two and we hit the chinlock for a bit. Hall comes back in and takes too long cartwheeling, allowing Michelle to get her boots up in the corner. It’s back to Kelly for the screaming headscissors as everything breaks down. Kelly’s rollup (how she won last week) is countered into the Glam Slam for the dominant pin.

Rating: C+. They did well enough here as you can tell the women are working hard to improve. It’s still not exactly great, but they’re looking confident in the stuff they’re doing. Phoenix is of course still miles ahead of the other three, but at least she’s getting something a bit better to work with over time. Nice quick match here.

Deuce vs. Great Charli

Runjin Singh is here with Charli, who yells in some mock Punjab about the greatness of…curry. Charli tells Deuce to come at him but the chop doesn’t do much. Instead Deuce knocks him down but dives into a raised boot. Charlie’s wig comes off and a top rope clothesline finishes Deuce quick.

Post match the real Great Khali comes out to wreck Charli.

We hype up the Smackdown move to MyNetworkTV.

No Mercy rundown.

Chris Jericho/Lance Cade vs. Shawn Michaels/???

Before the reveal, Jericho complains about being wished good luck in his match against Michaels at No Mercy because he’s better than Michaels could ever be. We hear about various things Jericho plans on doing to Michaels with the ladder, with Cade using a ladder to demonstrate. After a break, the partner is….HHH. Well who else was it going to be? Funny bit as Michaels runs to the back and comes back out in a DX shirt and hat because he knows his merchandise.

HHH and Jericho start things off with Jericho getting taken down, meaning it’s already off to Cade. That’s fine with HHH, who takes him down in a hurry, allowing the tag to Michaels to go after Jericho. Michaels gets caught in the wrong corner though and Jericho pulls him down into a chinlock. With that not getting him anywhere, Jericho tries and misses the Lionsault, allowing the double tags to HHH and Cade. The spinebuster puts Cade down but Jericho is in with the Codebreaker to HHH. Jericho and Cade beat on Michaels so much that it’s a DQ.

Rating: C+. Well it was going to be this or Cade losing so they didn’t have a ton of options. It’s not like HHH or one of the World Title participants are going to lose less than a week before the pay per view. At least they didn’t let this go long, as there wasn’t much of a point to doing anything beyond what they did here.

Post match Jericho grabs the ladder but HHH is back in with the sledgehammer to Cade so Michaels can splash him off the ladder. DX stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was about getting ready for No Mercy, which, at least on the Raw side, is a one match show. Does anyone really care about Batista vs. JBL for a future title shot? Or pretty much anything else that Raw is offering? There isn’t much you can do to build towards a one match half show but they managed to make it work well enough here. Not a great show, but Jericho and Michaels should be great.

 

 

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Survivor Series 1990 (2024 Edition): The Obvious Need

Survivor Series 1990
Date: November 22, 1990
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Attendance: 16,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Roddy Piper

I haven’t looked at this one in a long time so we might as well do it here. This is a big one from a historical stance, with an all time debut and something that is much more infamous than anything else. Other than that, we have the usual Survivor Series matches, plus an idea that they never used again. Let’s get to it.

We get the rather cool squares intros, showing all of the matches tonight, including the team names, which always add a nice flavor to the whole thing.

So the other deal here is that we have the Grand Finale Match of Survival, where the winners will face off again in a final Survivor Series match. Yeah I don’t get the point either.

The Ultimate Warriors promise to win. Well in theory that’s what Warrior says, as he rambles on about sacrifice and forming a bond with no medicine being able to cure what they have. I think.

Ultimate Warriors vs. Perfect Team

Ultimate Warriors: Ultimate Warrior, Texas Tornado, Legion Of Doom
Perfect Team: Mr. Perfect, Demolition

Mr. Fuji and Bobby Heenan are here with the villains. They take their sweet time settling down until Animal tackles Smash to start fast. A shot to the ribs slows Animal down and it’s Perfect coming in to stay on said ribs. Animal powerslams his way out of trouble and gets in an atomic drop, allowing the double tag to Von Erich and Ax (whose hair isn’t slicked back and who pretty clearly doesn’t want to be anywhere near this show). The Claw has Ax in trouble and it’s off to Warrior for the shoulder and splash for the elimination at 3:24. That’s the last you would see of Ax in the WWF ever again, and he can’t get out of the ring fast enough.

Crush comes in to clothesline Warrior but it’s off to Hawk to choke Perfect. One heck of a missed charge hits the post though and Demolition gets to hammer on Hawk. That doesn’t last long as Hawk is back up with a top rope clothesline and everything breaks down. The referee isn’t playing with this one and disqualifies the Legion of Doom and Demolition at 7:45, leaving us with Perfect vs. Warrior/Tornado. Piper: “I’M WRITING IT DOWN!”

Warrior comes in but Perfect wants Tornado, who comes in and knocks Perfect over the top. Perfect needs a breather on the floor so Warrior sends him into Heenan. Back in and Perfect avoids a charge into the post before going to the eyes to really keep Tornado in trouble. A ram into an exposed buckle into the PerfectPlex finishes Tornado at 11:05 and we’re one on one.

Warrior comes in and gets PerfectPlexed for two, but because it’s a finisher, he’s down for a bit. A clothesline gets two, with Warrior’s kickout sending Perfect onto the referee. That doesn’t have an impact this time as Warrior fights up and starts the clothesline comeback. The shoulder and splash finish Perfect for the win at 14:21.

Rating: D+. This was just lame in every sense of the word, as they never bothered to put in any effort, the double DQ was just lazy, and the ending was never in doubt as the villains were fighting from behind for most of the match. It was clear that Warrior had nothing to do at the moment and Perfect wasn’t a serious challenger. Pretty awful match here and still one of the worst in the show’s history.

The Million Dollar Team is ready to win, even with their absent mystery partner.

Dream Team vs. Million Dollar Team

Dream Team: Dusty Rhodes, Hart Foundation, Koko B. Ware
Million Dollar Team: Ted DiBiase, Rhythm And Blues, ???

So this is a famous one as DiBiase (Virgil) brings out the mystery partner, complete with his own manager Brother Love, the Undertaker. And this is immediately a hit, with Piper getting in the famous line of “LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT HAMHOCK!” This is one of those cases where everyone collectively went “….whoa” as you don’t see something like this very often and the people knew it.

Hart and Undertaker start things off and the proto chokeslam takes Hart down. Neidhart comes in and is immediately slammed so it’s off to Ware, who is piledriven (Monsoon: “He just got hit with the Tombstone!”) for the elimination at 1:45, instantly making Undertaker look like an absolute monster. Hart comes in and hammers away, so Undertaker glares at him and tags out in an almost eerie moment. The good guys start taking over on Valentine’s arm but he gets a knee up in the corner to cut Hart off. Honky Tonk Man comes in and is promptly powerslammed to give Neidhart the elimination at 4:24.

It’s off to DiBiase to hammer on Neidhart (makes sense on an Anvil), who fights up for the tag to the (non polka-dotted) Dusty. Elbows and a dropkick have DiBiase in trouble so it’s back to Neidhart, who gets tripped by Virgil. That’s enough for DiBiase to hit a clothesline for the elimination at 5:57, because people get pinned by clotheslines at the Survivor Series.

Hart comes back in and stomps away in the corner before Rhodes comes in and gets dropped with a shot to the face. It’s back to Undertaker, who chokes Hart in the corner but hands it back to DiBiase, who gets atomic dropped. Rhodes comes back in and gets dropped again, with Undertaker hitting a top rope ax handle to pin Rhodes at 8:33. Undertaker throws Rhodes over the top so Love can stomp away. That earns him a stalking to the back, with Undertaker following and getting counted out at 9:26, as they had to do something to avoid him getting pinned in his debut.

So it’s Hart vs. Valentine/DiBiase, but Hart small packages Valentine for the pin at 10:02 to get us down to one on one. Hart wastes no time in knocking DiBiase outside for a slingshot dive and a posting. Back in and Hart hammers away in the corner but DiBiase is back up with some chops. Hart seems to hurt his leg running the ropes, but it’s the not yet standard goldbricking so he can roll DiBiase up for two. Hart gets two off the middle rope elbow and tries a crossbody, with DiBiase rolling through for the final pin at 14:02.

Rating: B. This was a tale of two star making performances as Hart (who was dedicating the match to his brother, who had passed away the day before) had another one of those showings that made you know he was going to be something special. That being said, there’s a reason the Undertaker’s debut is one of the best ever, as sweet goodness he looked like an absolute star and you knew it was something special. Granted I don’t think anyone could have guessed how special, but it’s still effective over thirty five years later, so they’re definitely onto something.

Hart yelling F*** into the camera after the fall is oddly missing here.

The Vipers are in the shower and ready for a bunch of individual battles in their team match.

Vipers vs. Visionaries

Vipers: Jake Roberts, Rockers, Jimmy Snuka
Visionaries: Rick Martel, Power and Glory, Warlord

This is built around Martel blinding Roberts with his arrogance cologne. Snuka is looking horrible here, with a huge afro and a not so great looking face. Jannetty and the Warlord start things off, meaning Piper can make I Am The Walrus jokes. Warlord misses a charge into the corner to start but is fine enough to shrug off some dropkicks. Jannetty picks up thee pace with some right hands and Shawn clotheslines Warlord into a sunset flip.

Martel comes in and gets hiptossed into a dropkick with Martel bailing out to the floor. Roberts grabs a wristlock on Roma and it’s quickly off to Hercules vs. Snuka. The rapid fire tags bring Jannetty back in to hammer on Warlord, who powerslams him out of the air (that looked great) for the pin at 5:19.

Michaels comes in with a hurricanrana before it’s back to Roberts for a clothesline to put Warlord down. One heck of a backdrop sends Michaels flying and Hercules drops him with a clothesline. A hard whip into the corner gets two on Michaels but he avoids a charge into the post. Snuka comes in to unload in the corner before firing off a middle rope crossbody, but Martel rolls through and grabs tights for the pin at 9:46.

Roberts comes in to go after Martel, who hands it off to Hercules, much to Roberts’ annoyance. The threat of a DDT sends Hercules bailing out to the floor and a cheap shot (as Roberts can barely see) takes Roberts down. Roma misses a top rope fist drop though and it’s back to Michaels (who was injured by Power & Glory). A middle rope elbow gets two on Roma but Hercules comes in off a blind tag to deck him from behind. Hercules drops him with a gorilla press and the PowerPlex makes it 4-1 at 15:17.

Warlord wastes no time with a bearhug but Roberts gets out. Since 4-1 isn’t enough, Roma offers a distraction so the referee doesn’t see the DDT….or Martel spraying Roberts with Arrogance. That’s enough for Roberts, so he grabs Damien and chases Martel (not legal, so not eliminated) to the back for the countout to wrap it up at 17:04.

Rating: C-. While not as bad as the opener, this was another boring match with pretty much nothing going on. Martel and company weren’t a good team but they were running through the Vipers like they weren’t even there. Michaels was his usual good self, but Snuka looked ancient, Jannetty wasn’t there long enough, and Roberts hit his one move. Another bad match as this show is remembered for one good thing for a reason.

The Hulkamaniacs have been surviving for a long time and now it’s time to do it again here. They also dedicate the match to the armed forces and are ready to go fight Saddam Hussein.

Hulkamaniacs vs. Natural Disasters

Hulkamaniacs: Hulk Hogan, Tugboat, Jim Duggan, Big Boss Man
Natural Disasters: Earthquake, Dino Bravo, Haku, Barbarian

Jimmy Hart and Bobby Heenan are here with the villains as commentary tries to figure out the lineup for the Grand Finale match. How do you know that Rick Martel is going to be a heel? Maybe he’s a Little Warrior. Big pop for Hogan too, as there was something left to this Hulkamania thing. Piper: “What are they chanting?” Gorilla: “Hogan!” Piper: “That might have been the dumbest question I’ve asked in 1990.”

Duggan and Haku slug it out to start until Haku misses a middle rope crossbody (oh geez he can fly too). Duggan’s elbow misses as well so it’s off to Bravo for an atomic drop. Boss Man comes in to slug away on Haku, who hits a dropkick to cut him off. That earns him the Boss Man Slam and Haku is out at 3:15. Boss Man kicks Barbarian in the face but goes after Heenan, allowing Barbarian to come back with a belly to back suplex. Duggan comes in but gets powered into the corner by Earthquake, who isn’t about to be slammed. Instead Duggan grabs the 2×4 to chase Hart but stops to hit Earthquake for the DQ at 6:12.

Hogan comes in to slam all three villains and hammers away at Earthquake in the corner. That’s broken up and Earthquake plants him down, allowing Bravo to drop an elbow. Hogan goes technical though and small packages Bravo for the pin at 8:00 as the villains are playing from behind again. Boss Man comes in to slug away at Earthquake….who catches a high crossbody in mid air. Sweet goodness that’s insane. Hogan breaks it up but Barbarian gets in a cheap shot from the apron. Some elbow drops get rid of Boss Man at 9:10 to get us down to 2-2, with even commentary forgetting that Tugboat was there.

Hogan hammers on Earthquake but can’t slam him this time. He can bring in Tugboat though and the brawl with Earthquake goes to the floor for the double countout at 11:34, making it Hogan vs. Barbarian. The slow beating is on and a not great piledriver gives Barbarian two. A double clothesline leaves both of them down and it’s Barbarian up first with his big clothesline. Hogan fights up and the big boot into the legdrop finishes at 14:50.

Rating: C. And that’s the second best match of the night. This was Hogan and his friends doing Hogan’s greatest hits against a pretty generic group of villains. You could see that the magic was wearing off with Hogan as he didn’t have a top opponent (after beating Earthquake at Summerslam) and the match was only so exciting. Beating Earthquake by countout on back to back pay per views didn’t help either.

Hogan beats up Heenan for fun.

Here is Randy Savage to be annoyed at being accused of….eating Thanksgiving dinner? Either way, he’s after the Ultimate Warrior and the WWF Title, because it is being held by the Ultimate Chicken. Queen Sherri did NOT do his fighting for him when he slapped the Warrior because he is the greatest Superstar of all time.

Alliance vs. Mercenaries

Alliance: Nikolai Volkoff, Tito Santana, Bushwhackers
Mercenaries: Sgt. Slaughter, Boris Zhukov, Orient Express

Before the match, Slaughter mocks the American troops in the Middle East for not having a good Thanksgiving dinner. Piper is TICKED over this, to the point where I’m surprised he and Slaughter never had a title match. Butch hammers on Zhukov to start and it’s off to Santana for the flying forearm and the pin at 50 seconds. As the heels are behind AGAIN. The Battering Ram gets rid of Sato at 1:51 as they’re making it pretty clear that this match doesn’t need to be a Survivor Series match because a bunch of people are going to be gone fast.

Tanaka kicks Butch down and misses a headbutt, meaning it’s another forearm to make it 4-1 at 2:11. Volkoff comes in to hammer away in the corner but gets dropped with a clothesline. Some elbow drops begin the slow beatdown, capped off with another elbow for the pin at 5:26. The Bushwhackers are in with a double clothesline but Luke’s top rope splash hits knees. A gutbuster gives Slaughter the pin at 6:32 and Butch is out to a clothesline at 6:55.

So it’s Santana vs. Slaughter with Santana coming in off the top with a forearm to take over. Slaughter is right back with a neckbreaker and a backbreaker gets two. A suplex gives Slaughter a delayed two but the referee gets bumped. Santana hits the forearm but General Adnan comes in with the flag shot for the DQ to end this at 10:35.

Rating: D+. This show is terrible and there isn’t much of a way to hide it. It was clear that this needed to be Santana vs. Slaughter, as the match would have been better and let us skip six eliminations in about seven minutes. At the same time, Slaughter wasn’t feeling like a top heel here and there wasn’t much of a way around it.

Ted DiBiase and the Visionaries are ready for Hulk Hogan, Ultimate Warrior and Tito Santana, because Warrior and Hogan had issues just a few months ago at Wrestlemania.

And now, it’s time for the egg to hatch. Yeah there has been a big egg for weeks and it finally hatches to reveal….a humanoid turkey thing which Gene Okerlund dubs the Gobbledy Gooker. He and Gene go to the ring to dance and the fans boo this out of the building, as it’s just a big waste of time that adds nothing. The idea was to make a fun mascot for kids but that could have been covered by someone like Jim Duggan in a costume. Also, when you’re expecting anything interesting and get…whatever this was. This is an all time disaster and it has become a running joke for almost forty years as a result.

Hulk Hogan, Ultimate Warrior and Tito Santana don’t think they’re behind because the Hulkamaniacs are in their corner.

Hulk Hogan/Tito Santana/Ultimate Warrior vs. Visionaries/Ted DiBiase

Santana forearms Warlord for the pin at 24 seconds. Roma powerslams Santana down and DiBiase comes in with a suplex for two. Santana misses the forearm and gets caught with a hot shot for the pin at 1:52. Hogan comes in to hammer on DiBiase but Hercules comes in to get a few shots of his own. The villains keep taking turns hammering on Hogan as even Piper is telling him to get it together already. DiBiase gets two off a fist drop but the PowerPlex triggers the Hulk Up.

The clothesline finishes Roma at 5:39 so Martel comes in for the ineffective hammering. Hogan kicks him down and hands it off to Warrior who slams Martel a few times, allowing Hogan to clothesline Martel to the floor for a countout at 7:23. It’s down to DiBiase/Hercules, which would be a lot more interesting about two years ago. Hogan powers DiBiase into the corner, hits the boot and drops the leg to make it 2-1 at 8:38. The powerslam lets Warrior come back in for a shoulder and the splash to win it all at 9:09.

Rating: D. Good grief they actually made it less interesting. I didn’t think this could get worse as the rest of the show had bee but they pulled it off. I’m not sure what the point of this was other than to get Hogan and Warrior out there again, but it doesn’t really make much of a difference when we saw them both in the last few hours. Nothing to see here, with Hogan and Warrior running through some midcard villains in short order.

Overall Rating: D. There is one good match in almost two and half hours here and that match is mostly memorable for one debut and nothing more. Other than that, it was a good illustration of how things needed to change. The 80s were over and Warrior wasn’t working on top, but Hogan’s act was fairly tired and not the long term solution.

That being said, the biggest problem is the lack of major villains. Warrior had Mr. Perfect, Hogan had already had his big match with Earthquake, and other than that you had Savage on the way up, but that’s not enough to fight two superpowers. Slaughter was getting a reaction but it absolutely did not have any kind of long term shelf life. Undertaker looked good, but it was his first night and he needed time to be turned into something big.

The whole thing didn’t work and it just kept getting worse. The Gooker stuff was the big, horrible icing on the whole thing as this was a bad show, with Undertaker and Bret Hart not being enough to come close to saving it. This show was pretty bad and the company was in need of a big overhaul, which would take a lot of time.

 

 

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Survivor Series Count-Up – 1989 (2018 Redo): The Greatest Team Of All Time

Survivor Series 1989
Date: November 23, 1989
Location: Rosemont Horizon, Rosemont, Illinois
Attendance: 15,294
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

This was one of two options for me to redo this year and since I did the 1996 show just two years ago and this is my favorite era, it wasn’t all that hard of a choice. It’s actually an interesting show as there are a few experiments taking place which could make for something fun to watch. Let’s get to it.

We open with the Saturday Night’s Main Event style promos from people on the show. This is already off to a cool start.

Hulk Hogan is happy that he’s healthy, but also for his team of Hulkamaniacs at the Survivor Series. I’m very glad he pointed out the name of the show we’ve paid to see.

Ted DiBiase is happy that he’s rich.

Jake Roberts is happy for the DDT.

Demolition is glad that they don’t have to fight each other. Fair point.

Randy Savage and Sherri are happy that he’s the only man worthy of being the Macho King.

Jim Duggan loves the USA. Sounds like a run of the mill day for him.

Dino Bravo is glad to have the Earthquake on his side.

Dusty Rhodes likes his polka dots.

Big Boss Man likes dishing out justice.

Brutus Beefcake likes wrestling, strutting and cutting. I wonder in what order.

Rick Martel is glad for his good looks.

Rick Rude is thankful for his ravishing body. Narcissism must run in the Rick family.

Roddy Piper is thankful for not being Ricky Rude.

The Genius….I think you can guess this one.

Mr. Perfect for being perfect. Kind of one dimensional no?

The Bushwhackers are glad for stuffing in turkey. Freaks.

Bobby Heenan is thankful for spending time with his family. The HEENAN Family that is.

The Ultimate Warrior for intensity. I’m stunned.

Vince McMahon narrates a card rundown. There’s something so weird about him being the voiceover guy. I miss those squares that show the match participants. Oh and team names other than Team Insert Name Here. You can’t think of some alliterative name? Like Rotten Writers?

One thing I’m thankful for: that the dark match was dark. This night got started with Boris Zhukov beating Paul Roma. I wouldn’t wish that on Vince Russo.

Enforcers vs. Dream Team

Big Boss Man, Bad News Brown, Rick Martel, Honky Tonk Man
Dusty Rhodes, Brutus Beefcake, Red Rooster, Tito Santana

As usual, this is mainly about the captains, but at least we get some Jive Soul Bro and Brutus Beefcake music, because the 80s were that awesome. Actually almost everyone involved here had great music. Again, the 80s were awesome. Dusty even has Boss Man’s nightstick because stealing things is part of the American dream. Tito and Honky Tonk start things off because Tito vs. Martel on pay per view wasn’t allowed for some reason. An early armbar has Honky Tonk in trouble but a cheap shot allows Martel to come in.

The pace picks way up as they run the ropes and Martel scores with a dropkick. Tito is right back with an atomic drop into a rollup for two so it’s off to Boss Man, who gets armdragged in a hurry. Dusty comes in and you can feel the energy go up. I’m not the biggest fan but that man had more charisma than almost anyone ever. With the dancing jabs out of the way, Brutus comes in and gets pounded down by Boss Man.

Honky Tonk misses a right hand so it’s back to Martel for a backbreaker. Some knees to the back don’t do much so it’s off to Rooster as it becomes clear how much better the names were back then. Boss Man, Dream, Model, Bad News, Brutus and….well ok there was no saving Rooster. Speaking of Rooster, it’s his turn to get beaten up by a revolving door of villains. Ventura is right there talking about how the size difference is working against Rooster, almost like he’s a real analyst.

A sunset flip finally gets two on Honky Tonk and a collision puts both guys down. That’s enough for the tag off to Tito for some serious house cleaning but it’s too early for the Figure Four. Martel slams him down and misses his elbow that always misses. Tito grabs a rollup but Martel reverses into one of his own and a grab of the trunks (not sure how much that would help here) gets rid of Santana at 9:15.

Dusty comes in and we cut to a shot of a “fan”, who will later be named Sapphire. Considering she hasn’t been officially introduced yet and would be gone just after Summerslam 1990, it’s kind of remarkable that she was only around for about nine months. Anyway Martel gets taken down with a dropkick and the big elbow gets two. It’s back to Rooster for what looks like some dancing and a headlock, which is quickly countered into a backbreaker.

The bearhug from Boss Man has Rooster in even more trouble until he bites his way to freedom. Boss Man tags Bad News (again, great names) but he doesn’t want to come in, meaning Rooster has to pull him in. Ever the serious one, Bad News isn’t about to have any of this stupid gimmick and beats the heck out of Rooster.

Boss Man comes in without a tag and accidentally hits Bad News. Oh dear I don’t see this going well. Before Bad News can use them all as floss, he walks out on his teammates and is counted out at 15:30. The melee allows Brutus to come back in and hammer on Boss Man until an elbow to the jaw cuts him down. Honky Tonk comes back in for two off a belly to back suplex and shrugs off some right hands (90% of Brutus’ offense). He can’t shrug off the high knee (5%, along with the sleeper for the remaining 5% as Brutus wasn’t exactly versatile) and it’s 3-2 at 17:24.

Martel comes in next and chinlocks Brutus down, followed by a backbreaker to put Brutus on the apron. Brutus comes back in with a sunset flip though, and after Martel gets caught grabbing the ropes, Boss Man is on his own at 20:13. Rooster comes in (Dusty is kind of a lame partner) and tries some forearms, only to get caught in the Boss Man Slam for the elimination at 21:00. Now Dusty is willing to come in for the big right hands and Brutus adds some chops. Boss Man is rocked so Dusty comes in with with a crossbody for the final pin at 21:59.

Rating: C-. It was dull at times, but there’s only so much you can get out of some of these people. Honky Tonk was past his expiration date, Rooster was Rooster, Brown was barely involved, Tito vs. Martel should have been its own match, and Dusty was only in there for a little while. The match wasn’t bad and it was a good way to start things off, but there were only two feuds of note in the whole match.

Post match Slick throws Boss Man the nightstick and it’s a heck of a beating for Dusty and Brutus. Dusty even gets handcuffed and beaten down on the ropes, drawing some blood. Well….were you expecting anything else from him? Brutus finally makes the save with the clippers.

In the back, Boss Man says Dusty is his prisoner. Well your prisoner is currently in the middle of a big arena and being let out of handcuffs. I see why Boss Man left the prison job.

The 4×4’s, all carrying 2×4’s, are ready for the King’s Court. Bret Hart says it’ll be their finest hour. Ronnie Garvin wants to use his board for uh….things. Hercules doesn’t think they’ll have any problems. Jim Duggan says their team is ready for anything.

4×4’s vs. King’s Court

Jim Duggan, Ronnie Garvin, Bret Hart, Hercules
Randy Savage, Canadian Earthquake, Dino Bravo, Greg Valentine

Yeah it’s the Canadian Earthquake because that you don’t want him confused with the Costa Rican Earthquake. The 4×4’s clear the ring with the boards and then try to toss them to each other. Garvin messes up because he’s Ronnie Garvin and a natural failure. Duggan follows Savage to the floor to start and hands it off to Hercules for a forearm to the back. A gorilla press sends Savage into the corner for a tag to Valentine for the atomic drop and the traditional funny sell job.

Bret comes in to work on the arm and Duggan sends said arm into the buckle. It’s off to Hercules for some forearms on the also legal Bravo but Earthquake comes in, runs him over, and hits the Earthquake for the elimination at 3:57. Duggan tries his luck with some shoulders that have no effect, so Bret gets behind Earthquake to trip him down on a third try. Garvin comes in and I suddenly want to see Earthquake crush him like a grape.

The Court starts taking turns on Garvin, including a top rope ax handle from Savage. A quick backslide gets two on Bravo but it’s already back to Savage for the snap jabs in the corner. Valentine comes back in though and since we’re not ten minutes into the match yet, Duggan makes a blind tag and clotheslines him out to even things up at 7:32.

Savage comes in and snaps Duggan’s throat across the top rope and it’s back to Earthquake for some forearms to the back. The Court is certainly making good tags to take their turns. Earthquake misses the big elbow so it’s off to Garvin to chop and headbutt Bravo. There’s the Garvin Stomp (it’s stupid when Randy Orton does it too) but Bravo rakes the eyes to break up the Sharpshooter.

It’s off to Hart vs. Savage and Randy PANICS as the crowd really wakes up. You better believe those Bret pops were being noticed, even if it took two years to get to the solo run. Savage gets taken down and runs off for the tag to Bravo so Bret beats him up instead. Garvin comes in again and is IMMEDIATELY side suplexed for the elimination at 11:18. I never get over how much Garvin absolutely sucks. He just got pinned clean by DINO BRAVO. What in the world does that say about your career?

Duggan hammers on Earthquake again before handing it back to Bret for a matchup I never knew I wanted to see. Bret wants Savage though and Jesse, a big fan of both guys, is rather pleased by these developments. Savage gets tied up in the ropes and Duggan, ever the All-American, chokes behind the referee’s back. A missed knee drop makes things even worse for Savage and Bret gets two off a backbreaker. Bret misses the middle rope elbow (a regular one as he didn’t have his signature version down yet) though and it’s back to Bravo for the bearhug.

It’s back to Earthquake for some choking and a two count with the fans being rather pleased by the kickout. Bret avoids a Savage charge to send him into Bravo though and now the hot tag brings Duggan back in. For reasons of temporary insanity (or maybe sanity in his case), Savage drives Duggan into his own corner so Hart can tag himself in. A quick missed charge hits the post though and Bravo adds a shoulder breaker, setting up Savage’s elbow for the elimination at 19:07.

So it’s Duggan alone against Bravo, Earthquake and Savage, meaning Jim is looking completely fine. Earthquake unloads on him in the corner and the level of fine is starting to come down. Duggan beats up all three of them without much effort (Behold the power of AMERICA! Ignoring that Savage is from AMERICA of course!) and tosses the whole team outside.

As the announcers try to figure out who is legal, Earthquake comes back in and drops the big elbow for two. Savage hits the ax handle but misses the running crotch attack. Since the guys kind of suck at this, Sherri low bridges Duggan to the floor and it’s a countout at 23:25 to finish Duggan off.

Rating: D+. The strange ending aside (Duggan can’t take a pin here? Not even 3-1 with the new big monster and RANDY SAVAGE on the other team?), this wasn’t all that thrilling of a match. Other than the fans going coconuts for Hart, it was a lot of punching and kicking and very little more. It also wasn’t the biggest surprise, as any team with Hercules and Ronnie Garvin on the team and JIM DUGGAN as the brains of the operation is in serious trouble.

Post match Duggan cleans house with the 2×4.

Dusty Rhodes is very hurt but Gene Okerlund is sure that he’ll be dishing out Americana soon enough.

The Genius has a poem saying he’s smart and how stupid the fans are. That’s such a simple gimmick but it’s one that would work so well today. Give him a guitar and he’s basically Elias with a better vocabulary.

Million Dollar Team vs. Hulkamaniacs

Ted DiBiase, Powers of Pain, Zeus
Hulk Hogan, Demolition, Jake Roberts

I’m not going to explain Zeus in full again because it just makes my head hurt. You know what doesn’t make my head hurt? The most awesome Survivor Series team in the history of the planet. I mean seriously, Hogan, Roberts and Demolition. Someone please try to find something that matches that level of amazing so I can point at you can call you stupid.

Just in case it’s not enough yet, the villains won’t let them in the ring (Jesse: “Count all four of them out!”) so Jake throws Damien in, because the most awesome Survivor Series team in the history of the planet has A BIG FREAKING SNAKE TOO! Still one of my favorite moments ever and something I still throw on if I need a smile.

Zeus wants Hogan to start so Gorilla goes into his weird questions about what the Z on Zeus’ head is for. Like….what else do you think it’s for? He’s a big Zorro fan? I mean, he should be because Zorro is so awesome that he would be first on the list if this team ever needed a fifth man but I still don’t get that rant. Hogan of course can’t hurt Zeus to start as the right hands and clotheslines have no effect.

A jumping knee does nothing so Hogan rakes the eyes and gets in a slam, which does all the damage of a standard slam. Zeus pops up and cranks on Hogan’s neck, in a spot that the Giant would use to put him on the shelf for weeks in WCW. A bunch of choking and a shove of the referee are enough for the DQ to get rid of Zeus at 3:20.

Zeus won’t stop choking and it takes the combined forces of the Powers of Pain and DiBiase offering money to get him off. Hogan is mostly dead so DiBiase comes in to drop some knees. More choking keeps Hogan in trouble but he finally gets a boot up in the corner and brings Jake in. The beating begins in a hurry and it’s off to Demolition for the rapid fire pounding to the back (I could watch that for at least a minute). Hulk is fine enough to come back in for a middle rope ax handle as Gorilla goes on about the Z on Zeus’ head again.

DiBiase elbows Ax in the face and brings in Warlord because the Powers of Pain vs. Demolition is still a thing a year after it was a bigger thing at the previous year’s show. A clothesline gets Ax out of trouble but Mr. Fuji trips him up, allowing Warlord to drop a headbutt for the pin at 9:52.

It’s off to Hogan to beat up Warlord in a match you would think would have happened at some point. Jake comes in and the fans want the DDT but have to settle for Smash hitting an ax handle to the back instead. Not quite the same thing. Barbarian kicks him in the face though and it’s DiBiase coming back in with a middle rope ax handle (the most popular move on the show).

The falling punch (still cool) gets two and we hit the chinlock. DiBiase misses the middle rope falling elbow (as always) but Smash still won’t tag for no apparent reason. Barbarian tags himself in and takes Smash’s head off with a top rope clothesline for the elimination at 13:44. Jake comes in but can’t DDT Barbarian no matter how many times he tries. The beating continues as Hulk is dying for a tag.

Some knee drops and a piledriver get two on Roberts but Barbarian misses the Swan Dive. There’s the hot tag to Hogan (Jesse: “Uh oh.”) and it’s time to clean house. The rapid elbows and a suplex give Hogan two (you don’t see him getting many near falls) and he clotheslines both Powers down. They pop back up and hit a spike piledriver….for a double DQ at 19:51, sending Jesse over the edge in an awesome rant. And yeah, that’s completely bogus, especially with Hogan and Roberts now having a 2-1 advantage over DiBiase.

The Million Dollar Dream has Hogan in trouble and Roberts has to save Hogan at two arm drops (Jesse: “THAT’S THREE TIMES! THREE TIMES! HOW COME ROBERTS WASN’T DISQUALIFIED???”). Hogan fights out of another attempt and punches DiBiase out of the air (because he was trying ANOTHER ax handle). The latest hot tag brings in Roberts for a neck snap across the top rope, giving us another great DiBiase sell.

Cue Virgil with his bad hand so Roberts beats him up too, including a DDT to a big pop. With Roberts down, DiBiase gets in the fist drop and throws his feet on the ropes to get rid of Jake at 23:42. Hogan is still down from the Million Dollar Dream so DiBiase picks him up and hits a clothesline for two. A chinlock goes on and Hogan slaps DiBiase’s arm, which would be shocking to see today. The comeback gives us a double clothesline but Hogan is up first and hits exactly what you would expect to set up the legdrop for the pin at 27:32.

Rating: C-. I love the face team but my goodness they picked a really weird way to get to the finish here. Hogan and company were either even or ahead for most of the match and Hogan just wins with ease in the end. What’s a better way to go here: the usual, or Zeus, who Hogan is feuding with at the moment, wrecking Hogan so badly that DiBiase pins him to set up a title program with DiBiase down the line? I wasn’t feeling this one, but the energy (and Jesse ranting) helped it a lot.

Jesse is LIVID post match, saying the referee probably even disqualified Virgil too.

Savage and Zeus, who face Beefcake and Hogan in a cage match in a few weeks, are ready to take care of business inside the cage. Sherri waving her hands in the background for some reason is a little distracting.

Hogan comes in to Beefcake’s locker room and they’re ready to win in the cage. Sherri comes in and throws powder in their eyes so the beatdown can be on.

We run down the remaining two matches.

As intermission continues, Jesse talks about issues inside the Heenan Family, including pushing and shoving in the locker room.

The Rude Brood is ready to win tonight. Rick Rude talks about his great teammates, Mr. Perfect knows how to get rid of Jimmy Snuka and the Rougeau Brothers have been training extra hard.

Roddy Piper can’t get his team to quit eating before the match. I remember this from when I was a kid and it’s still bizarre.

Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies

Rick Rude, Mr. Perfect, Rougeau Brothers
Roddy Piper, Jimmy Snuka, Bushwhackers

There’s no Heenan with Rude, playing up the issues in the Family. Perfect jumps Luke from behind to start so it’s already off to Butch for a bite of the leg. Piper and Snuka bite the arm and it’s back to Butch to bite the back for a second helping. Jacques comes in and nips up but stops for a hug from his brother. We settle down to Jacques flipping over Snuka but getting taken down by a flying headbutt. A chop keeps Jacques in trouble and Snuka….I want to say dances? With Jacques down, the Superfly Splash is good for the elimination at 4:01.

Rude comes in for a leapfrog and a hip swivel before handing it off to Perfect. A botched low bridge sends Perfect outside as the Brood can’t get anything going at all. Luke comes in for a snapmare on Perfect and Snuka punches him in the face. The fast tags continue with Butch coming in for a few knees to the back. Piper’s atomic drop knocks Perfect over for the tag to Raymond, whose backdrop is countered into a sunset flip for two. Raymond gets two off a superkick but Piper grabs a piledriver for the second elimination at 7:39.

Perfect is in next for a snapmare of his own on Piper but gets catapulted into the corner as only Perfect could do. Butch comes in for some near falls off some stomping but a single kick to the chest knocks him into the corner. That means it’s back to Piper for some right hands and a hip swivel at Rick as Perfect is turned inside out. Butch adds another bite but gets rolled up for the elimination at 10:45.

Piper is right back in for a rollup of his own and Snuka adds a top rope chop to the head. It’s Luke’s turn to hammer away and a headbutt to the ribs gets two. Perfect is able to make a tag but Rude gets punched out of the air. Not that it matters though as a kick to the ribs sets up the Rude Awakening to even things up at 12:14.

So now we can have the match that they wanted in the first place, which definitely sounds better. Rude chops Snuka down and throws in a hip swivel before handing it back to Perfect, who gets kicked in the face. It’s already back to Rude for a chinlock, which goes nowhere either so Perfect comes in and gets small packaged for two. You really can tell that the energy has gone out of the arena and they’re just going through the motions with this one.

A ramming of the heads puts Perfect and Snuka down (should have knocked Perfect silly) and there’s the double tag. They slug it out, which is never a good idea against Piper. The fight falls to the floor and it’s a double countout at 18:36. So we’re down to Perfect vs. Snuka with Perfect making the mistake of ramming Snuka’s head into the buckle. Dude have you ever watched a Snuka match? A dropkick puts Snuka on the floor but he’s right back in for a pinfall reversal sequence. Snuka’s high crossbody is reversed into a cover for two but it’s the PerfectPlex to finish him at 21:27.

Rating: D. I’ve never liked this match as it was basically a delayed start until we got to the match that they really wanted to do. It also doesn’t really advance anything as Snuka vs. Perfect wasn’t a feud and Piper vs. Rude is right where it was before. At least Perfect got the win though and that’s what really matters, because he should have been ready to move up into the main event.

Post match Snuka goes after Perfect and Genius but the smart (and perfect) villains get away.

The Rude Brood says to not worry about Heenan’s whereabouts and promise to celebrate the ravishing way.

The Ultimate Warriors are ready to go. Jim Neidhart laughs a lot, the Rockers are their usual confident selves, and Ultimate Warrior says they all have organ donor cards. My goodness imagine the drug bills.

Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family

Ultimate Warrior, Rockers, Jim Neidhart
Andre the Giant, Arn Anderson, Haku, Bobby Heenan

Heenan is out there because Tully Blanchard failed a drug test and is leaving, never to wrestle in a national promotion again. The fight starts before Warrior even shows up but here he is to save Neidhart as the bell rings. Three clotheslines put Andre on the floor and it’s a countout at 27 seconds, which is totally different than Zeus being eliminated earlier. Anderson’s “DANG IT” face is great, as always.

We settle down to Anderson getting beaten up by anyone who can get their hands on him, including the running tackle in the corner from Neidhart. Andre finally gets up and staggers out, with the Rockers getting in a few cheap shots. Haku comes in for some forearms to the back and Heenan chokes in the corner as Jesse says he would take Heenan over Gorilla in a fight. Before Gorilla can freak out, Haku superkicks Neidhart for the elimination at 3:31.

Michaels comes in to pick up the pace with a monkey flip before it’s off to Marty to start on the arm. Marty’s crossbody is caught but Shawn hits the dropkick to the back for the near fall. It’s back to Anderson, who can’t get a suplex, but Haku comes in to make it a double suplex, which is caught by Shawn in a nice save. Double superkicks get two and it’s off to Warrior for a backdrop. Heenan refuses the tag (well duh) so Anderson gets caught in an armbar instead.

Anderson takes him down with a shot to the ribs, hands it off to Heenan for a kick to the ribs, and then comes back in when Heenan gets touched once. That was the only way to go and it’s worth a chuckle. Anderson beats the heck out of Jannetty and Haku adds a few shots to knock Jannetty silly. Heenan comes back in for some stomps on Jannetty and a knee drop….for the clean pin at 8:54.

Egads how far have you fallen when you’re losing clean falls to Heenan? It’s instantly back to Anderson, who gets caught in Warrior’s bearhug. A rake to the eyes gets Anderson out of trouble so Haku gets bearhugged as well. It’s off to Michaels, who gets sent outside so Warrior has to toss him back inside. Heenan’s front facelock doesn’t work so here’s Anderson again for some stomping in the corner. Shawn is back up and rubs Anderson’s face into the mat, blinding him so badly that he tries to tag Warrior.

A Rocket Launcher gives Shawn two but for some reason it wakes Anderson up enough to take over again and bring in Haku. That just means a missed charge though and Shawn gets rid of him with a high crossbody at 12:54, leaving us with Shawn/Warrior vs. Anderson/Heenan. Four Hall of Famers isn’t too shabby. Heenan is willing to come in and punch Shawn a few times but Warrior scares him into the corner.

With Michaels on the floor, Heenan goes up (oh dear)…but climbs back down a few seconds later with a fit of sanity coming over him. Heenan refuses a tag so Anderson gets sunset flipped for two, sending him into a frenzy over the lack of a tag. Shawn gets knocked down so it’s back to Heenan, who tags out almost immediately again. Anderson wins a slugout and scores with some headbutts to the ribs in the corner as Warrior is shaking his head for some reason. Odd man indeed. There’s the spinebuster to get rid of Michaels at 15:48, though Anderson can barely move.

Some running shoulders have Anderson in trouble but he sidesteps a charging Warrior to send him outside. Heenan goes up again and again comes back down. Now Heenan is willing to come back in but when the no selling begins, Heenan’s time in the ring quickly comes to an end. Anderson sends him into the corner but Heenan won’t tag in again, probably being as smart as he can. Warrior rams them together and hits the gorilla press into the splash to get rid of Anderson at 18:16.

Reality hasn’t set in yet for Heenan so Warrior sneaks up on him…giving us a hilarious visual as Heenan slowly turns around. Jesse: “You’re loving this aren’t you Monsoon?” The beating begins in a hurry and Heenan is thrown over the corner to the floor. That’s enough for Heenan but Warrior throws him back inside for a shoulder and the splash for the final pin at 20:27.

Rating: D+. Heenan alone almost made this entertaining but there’s only so much that even he could do. The wrestling isn’t the point here and there’s nothing wrong with that. Warrior winning was never in doubt as his biggest challenge was eliminated in less than thirty seconds. Not a good match, but Heenan made it fun enough.

Post match Heenan staggers to the back, with Warrior running up behind him for one more clothesline.

A stills package ends the show to Warrior’s music.

Overall Rating: D. This one really didn’t work very well with a lot of punching and kicking matches and very little else. The storylines weren’t so much advanced as much as just storylines staying in one place. Having Hogan in the middle and Warrior in the main event was certainly an experiment but it was more odd than anything else. The energy goes away at the end of the third match and you can feel it being gone. I love it for the nostalgia, but there’s just not enough here.

Ratings Comparison

Dream Team vs. Enforcers

Original: B-
2012 Redo: C+
2018 Redo: C-

King’s Court vs. 4x4s

Original: B+
2012 Redo: D+
2018 Redo: D+

Hulkamaniacs vs. Million Dollar Team

Original: D-
2012 Redo: C
2018 Redo: C-

Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies

Original: D
2012 Redo: C-
2018 Redo: D

Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family

Original: C+
2012 Redo: C-
2018 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D+
2012 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D

My original reviews continue to amaze me.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

Survivor Series Count-Up – 1989 (Original): What A Weird Match

And the 2012 redo:

Survivor Series Count-Up – 1989 (2012): Bonus Round

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Survivor Series Count-Up – 1987 (2022 Redo): They Found The Magic Word

Survivor Series 1987
Date: November 26, 1987
Location: Richfield Coliseum, Richfield, Ohio
Attendance: 21,300
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

This is the requested redo so we’ll go all the way back to the beginning of the series, which was quite the mess in its own right. The WWF had tried some elimination tags at house shows and they got over huge so it was time to run a full event of the things. If they could happen to screw over the NWA with its first pay per view on the same day, Starrcade 1987, so be it of course. Let’s get to it.

The Fink welcomes us to the show and introduces Jesse and Gorilla for commentary, which is a weird thing to see. I’m not sure I can ever remember WWF doing it otherwise. Monsoon’s first line of the show: “What are you doing Jess?” They intro the show and send us to the intro video, which could be on just about any weekend show.

Commentary goes over all of the matches in their always good conversational style. It’s fine that they disagree at times, but there are times where it feels like they are two people who respect each other and are even friends. That is so badly missing from commentary today.

We go over the rules of a Survivor Series match. It’s so weird having a time where that wasn’t commonly known.

The Honky Tonk Man is ready to go because he has an amazing team put together, even down to the managers. As for tonight, he might even SHAKE RATTLE AND ROLL ELIZABETH! Well that’s just not very nice. I love these group shots of the wrestlers, as not only do you get what most of them are, but it also screams 1980s so hard. Throw in Hercules looking like his head is about to explode and it’s even better.

Team Randy Savage wants to destroy everyone, with Hacksaw Jim Duggan especially wanting to take out Harley Race for hitting him with his own 2×4. Savage being all over the top is….well very Savage really.

Team Honky Tonk Man vs. Team Randy Savage

Honky Tonk Man, Ron Bass, Danny Davis, Harley Race, Hercules
Randy Savage, Ricky Steamboat, Jake Roberts, Jim Duggan, Brutus Beefcake

Entrances take forever, as we have ten people coming to the ring, with Jesse being in awe of Randy Savage’s entrance (fair enough, and Jesse was always a big Savage guy). Beefcake and Hercules get to make history as the first people ever to start a Survivor Series match, apparently as per the captains’ choice (which didn’t last long). A lockup goes nowhere so Beefcake tries strutting as Gorilla says the possible combinations of numbers are endless. Actually if my math is right it’s about 30 but I don’t question Gorilla.

A shoulder drops Beefcake but he’s right back with a quickly broken sleeper. Davis comes in and Beefcake cleans house without much trouble before pulling Davis back in. It’s off to Roberts to work on the arm and the good guys get to take turns on Davis. For some reason Roberts and Duggan tell Savage to hand it off to Steamboat instead of one of them, leaving Steamboat to miss a charge into the corner. Race comes in and gets in a few shots, only for Steamboat to chop him in the head.

Back to back skinnings of the cat leave Race frustrated so Steamboat throws him over the top instead. Steamboat brings Duggan in to slug Race outside and it’s a double countout for the first eliminations at 4:39. Back in and it’s Bass slamming Roberts but missing an elbow, allowing Savage to give him a running knee. Savage makes the mistake of going after Honky Tonk Man though, allowing the villains to get in a cheap shot. Bass comes back in and since it’s Ron Bass, Savage escapes with no trouble and brings in Beefcake for the high knee and the pin on Bass at 7:01.

Hercules comes in and takes over on Beefcake’s arm, allowing Honky Tonk Man to do the same. Beefcake punches his way to freedom, including a weird double punch that you would think someone else would have used before. Davis gets in a cheap shot from the apron though and Shake Rattle and Roll finishes Beefcake at 10:51.

As we get the world’s first and still only STEVE LOMBARDI RULES sign in the crowd, Savage comes in to chase after Honky Tonk Man but gets jumped by the legal Hercules instead. Dang man pay attention. For some reason Davis is allowed to come in and hammer on Savage, who elbows him in the head. It’s off to Roberts who can’t DDT Honky Tonk Man but can charge into a raised knee in the corner (which always looks painful). Davis comes back in (oh boy) for some shots to the ribs but Roberts shrugs it off and hits the short arm clothesline, setting up the DDT for the pin at 15:11.

Hercules is right there to take over on Roberts though, with Honky Tonk Man drawing in Savage, who is a bit too obsessed with revenge at this point (shocking I know). The chinlock goes on as commentary debates the merits of having the crowd on your side. Roberts fights up and knee lifts Honky Tonk Man away but Hercules is right there for his own chinlock. A jawbreaker gets Roberts out of trouble and the hot tag brings in Steamboat to clean house. The top rope chop to the head sets up the tag to Savage (Jesse: “Uh oh.”) for the top rope elbow and the pin at 21:04.

So it’s Honky Tonk Man vs. Savage/Roberts/Steamboat, with Savage missing a charge into the corner to give Honky Tonk Man a breather. Steamboat comes right back in and chops away before handing it off to Roberts to keep up the rotating beating. An atomic drop sends Honky Tonk Man over the top and that’s enough for him as he takes the countout (smartest thing he’s ever done) to wrap it up at 23:43.

Rating: B-. This is how you open a new concept show as you had stars that people cared about with a wide variety of eliminations and situations. It’s a good way to get the fans into what they’re seeing, with Savage doing everything he could to get his hands on Honky Tonk Man. Very fun match and a great choice to get things going.

Team Andre the Giant is ready to crush Hulk Hogan and friends tonight, with Slick being VERY over the top and Bobby Heenan being incredibly confident. One Man Gang, who is a huge man in his own right, being absolutely dwarfed by Andre is an amazing visual. Granted the closeup of Andre’s face as he says he’s coming for Hogan’s soul with his eyes bugging out is even worse.

Team Fabulous Moolah vs. Team Sensational Sherri

Fabulous Moolah, Rockin Robin, Velvet McIntyre, Jumping Bomb Angels
Sensational Sherri, Donna Christianello, Dawn Marie, Glamour Girls

It’s so weird to see a women’s match in this era but there is more than enough talent to make this work. For some reason Moolah is announced at 160lbs, which can’t be correct and certainly seems to offend her. Sherri jumps McIntyre to start fast and drops her with a running clothesline. Moolah comes in to beat on Sherri so Christianello comes in to get dropkicked by McIntyre. A victory roll gets rid of Christianello at 1:59 so it’s Robin coming in to dropkick Martin (Judy Martin of the Glamour Girls).

Sherri comes in for her own dropkick and hands it off to Marie (not THAT Dawn Marie, in a joke that no one has ever made before I’m sure), who is crossbodied for the pin at 4:11. Itsuki (of the Angels) comes in blows Jesse’s mind (you can tell he’s actually impressed) with her rollups and kicks to Kai. Sherri comes in and gets suplexed by Tateno, with Jesse being amazed that the champ is getting beaten up like this. Robin monkey flips Kai but gets pulled into the wrong corner so the beating can be on. Sherri hits a suplex to get rid of Robin at 6:56.

Tateno takes Robin’s place and is thrown around by the hair (OUCH) to put her in the corner. McIntyre comes in for a spinning crossbody (cool) and Moolah follows up with a dropkick. It’s off to Itsuki, who slams Kai off the top but misses a dropkick (popular move in this one). Moolah gets to hammer away a bit more but a blind tag lets Martin hit a clothesline for the pin at 8:57.

As commentary DOESN’T panic at the idea of the captain being eliminated, McIntyre comes in to Boston crab Martin. With that falling apart, McIntyre wisely switches to a bow and arrow, which doesn’t last long either. Sherri grabs a suplex, which leaves McIntyre landing kind of awkwardly on her neck/shoulders and she’s almost immediately over for a tag to Tateno. Martin suplexes Tateno for two and a bell in a rare timekeeper’s botch, with commentary IMMEDIATELY saying not so fast (take notes Michael Cole).

McIntyre’s back is fine enough to come in for a giant swing on Sherri, followed by another victory roll (which clearly in a lot of pain) and the pin at 14:56. Tateno comes back in as McIntyre can barely get out of the ring and has to almost lay on the apron. Kai blocks a suplex so it’s back to McIntyre, who tries another victory roll but gets slingshotted into an electric chair (that looked good) for the pin at 17:23. That would be McIntyre’s last match for over a month so there was something wrong.

We’re down to the Angels vs. the Girls with Tateno wasting no time in hitting a high crossbody to get rid of Kai at 18:43. Martin is on her own and starts with a fireman’s carry drop for two on Tateno. Itsuki comes back in for a top rope knee, Tateno dropkicks Jimmy Hart off the apron, and Itsuki adds a top rope clothesline for the pin at 20:18.

Rating: C. The wrestling wasn’t the best for the most part, but what is impressive here is that they had ten women who could put together a completely watchable match like this one. Women’s wrestling in the 80s gets a bad reputation but they were a genuine part of the card and had good matches in the right circumstances. This didn’t feel out of place whatsoever and the Angels were a total highlight so this was quite the fine use of 20+ minutes.

Team Hart Foundation, minus the national anthem singing Bolsheviks, are ready to win. A disheveled Jimmy Hart comes in and wants revenge.

Team Strike Force, not minus singing Russians, are ready to win.

Team Strike Force vs. Team Hart Foundation

Strike Force, Fabulous Rougeau Brothers, Killer Bees, British Bulldogs, Young Stallions
Hart Foundation, Demolition, New Dream Team, Bolsheviks, Islanders

If someone is eliminated, their partner is gone too. Volkoff jumps Martel to start and shrugs off a rollup without much trouble. Zhukov comes in and misses an elbow so it’s off to Santana for the flying forearm and the pin at 1:45. It’s off to Ax for the standard Demolition forearms to the back before Jacques gets to work on Bravo’s arm. The rapid fire tags leave us with Dynamite being dragged into the corner for a chop off with Haku.

Dynamite gets Haku over so the Bees can start in on his hamstrings and it’s off to Roma. Neidhart slams him down and Haku drops him with a clothesline. Smash’s slam sends Roma into the corner for the tag to Jacques, who is quickly dropped and pinned by Smash at 5:50.

Powers comes in and gets put on Neidhart’s shoulder for a top rope forearm from Haku (that’s a cool move and could have been a decent finisher for a team) and two. It’s back to Roma, who gets shouldered breakered and suplexed by Valentine. Smash misses a charge though and it’s Dynamite coming in to get kicked in the face. The beating continues but Smash throws the referee down and that’s a DQ at 9:22.

Powers sends Tama into the corner and gets clotheslined for his efforts as neither Gorilla nor Jesse can get Tama’s (Haku/Toma) name right. Martel comes in to dropkick Tama but he’s WAY too close to the ropes for the Boston crab. Neidhart makes the save so Santana comes in with the flying forearm, meaning Hart has to make a save. It’s such a save that Neidhart pins Santana at 12:05 as the field has thinned quite a bit (as it needed to).

As Jesse talks about his great great great grandfather Ephraim the Body coming over on the Mayflower, Bret hits a backbreaker on Powers and Tama adds a top rope knee for two. Oddly enough, Hart allows powers to get over for a tag to Roma, which felt rather out of the norm for him. It’s right back to Powers as Jesse wonders why the beaten up Stallions wouldn’t tag in a fresh Bee or Bulldog. Roma gets knocked into the corner for the tag to Dynamite, who suplexes Hart for a fast two.

Bulldog headbutts Haku over and over and somehow doesn’t knock himself silly. Powers misses a charge and gets taken into the wrong corner but it’s right back to Bulldog. The gorilla press gets two on Bret and the running powerslam gets the same on Haku. Dynamite adds the flying headbutt and knocks himself silly on Haku’s head, with Jesse going right into the rant about how stupid that was. A superkick gets rid of the Bulldogs at 19:59 and we’re down to Harts/Islanders/Dream Team vs. Bees/Stallions.

The Dream Team takes over on Powers as commentary talks about how the villains don’t really like each other anyway. The side slam drops Powers, who kicks away Valentine’s Figure Four attempt. That’s enough for Roma to come in off the top with a sunset flip to pin Valentine at 23:29.

Blair comes in for a jumping knee for two on Neidhart so Hart gets to try his luck. A headlock drags Roma over for the tag to Tama, who kicks Roma down without much effort. Haku misses a legdrop though, allowing Blair to hit his own legdrop for two. Roma comes back in and gets suplexed so Tama can rip at Roma’s eyes.

Haku hits a dropkick and Gorilla says he’d like to see Neidhart try that. Before the words are out of his mouth, Neidhart hits his own dropkick in a spot so perfectly timed that it had to have been a coincidence. Brunzell comes in and tries to slam Hart but Tama kicks him down…with Brunzell rolling through to pin Hart at 29:29.

So it’s the Islanders vs. the Bees/Stallions, with Tama going right to the nerve hold. Haku comes in for a nerve hold of his own before it’s back to Tama for the third nerve hold. A suplex mixes things up a bit for two but Brunzell manages to knock his way to freedom. Roma comes back in for two off a powerslam but Haku takes him down again. Jesse praises the Islanders for being saucy with hard heads as Haku misses an elbow, allowing the diving tag back to Brunzell. Gorilla isn’t sure what’s up with that as a masked Killer Bee (their method of cheating) slingshots in with a sunset flip to pin Tama for the win at 37:16.

Rating: A-. This was all about the talent involved as you had one great combination after another. The Stallions and Bees getting the glory in the end was a little weird but points for trying to put someone else over. Good stuff here and all the proof you need that this was the golden age for tag team wrestling, as there were all kinds of good to great teams in there and it doesn’t feel anywhere near the forty minutes that it runs.

Ted DiBiase talks about how great Thanksgiving is and we see a montage of him doing horrible things to people. Of note: a boy who gets a basketball kicked away from him is one Rob Van Dam. Then DiBiase has a catered dinner because he is one of the best villains in the history of wrestling.

Commentary talks about the show so far, with Jesse thinking that Honky Tonk Man did the right thing by walking away instead of risking an injury. This is the friendly chat that made their commentary feel real as compared to the constant yelling and insulting exchanges that you see too often with modern heel commentators.

Jesse is also REALLY impressed by the Jumping Bomb Angels, saying that the Glamour Girls (Women’s Tag Team Champions) are in trouble. He compares the Angels to a Dynamite Kid, a Ricky Steamboat or a Randy Savage, saying “that was fantastic, I enjoyed it”. That is how you put a team over. On the other hand, Jesse isn’t happy with the Killer Bees using their mask trick and wants an investigation. They’re both really looking forward to the main event though, because Hulk Hogan is getting back in the ring with Andre the Giant.

Honky Tonk Man insists that he is the real survivor and will face Hulk Hogan any time. This is pretty clearly intermission as they wait around on the main event, which makes sense on a four match show.

Team Hulk Hogan is VERY fired up with Hogan talking about how hungry the team is. That bandanna with the tassels hanging down over Hogan’s eyes is always a weird look.

Team Hulk Hogan vs. Team Andre The Giant

Hulk Hogan, Don Muraco, Ken Patera, Paul Orndorff, Bam Bam Bigelow
Andre The Giant, Rick Rude, One Man Gang, Butch Reed, King Kong Bundy

Bobby Heenan handles Andre’s introduction, which is a very Heenan thing of him to do. Hogan of course gets his own entrance, which is a very Hogan thing to do….but egads you can hear the reaction when he comes out with that American flag. Jesse: “I’m not even going to try to talk over this.” Gorilla: “Good thinking.” Muraco and Rude start things off with Rude hammering away in the corner. Orndorff comes in and knocks Rude into the corner so Hogan can come in for a very rare meeting with Rude (they didn’t like each other).

It’s off to Bigelow for the running headbutt and a gorilla press as they’re certainly starting fast. Patera screws up (shocking) by knocking Rude into the corner for the tag to Reed, who gets dropkicked down by Muraco. Orndorff hits some dropkicks of his own as even Jesse says Andre’s team isn’t doing so well so far. Hogan drops the leg and that’s it for Reed at 3:04….and it’s Andre time.

Some high fives to Patera count as a tag though and Jesse is ALL OVER Joey Marella for calling that a tag and trying to save Hogan again. Hogan protests too but doesn’t think about, you know, tagging right back in, leaving Andre to say the heck with Patera and hand it off to Bundy.

Some forearms don’t go anywhere so it’s off to Gang, who gets knocked into the corner by Orndorff. Rude comes back in and gets elbowed and slammed, with Jesse saying Rude just isn’t having a good night. Patera manages to crossbody Gang down for two but gets taken into the wrong corner so the beating can ensue. Gang and Patera hit double clotheslines but Gang falls on him for the pin at 8:44.

Hogan comes in to hammer on Gang (that’s his bread and butter), setting up a double big boot with Bigelow. Gang gets over to tag in Rude, who gets beaten down again by Orndorff. A cheap shot from Bundy breaks up the piledriver though and Rude grabs a rollup with trunks for the pin at 10:22.

Save for a house show feud with Rude, that was it for Orndorff in the WWF. Muraco comes in to powerslam Rude for the pin at 11:10, leaving us with Muraco/Hogan Bigelow vs. Gang/Bundy/Andre. Bundy misses a knee drop and Muraco is smart enough to go right after that leg. It’s already back to Gang, who falls on top of Muraco during a slam attempt. The big splash is enough to finish Muraco at 12:54.

Bigelow comes in and gets clotheslined right back down by Bundy. Hogan has to make a save, with Gorilla immediately saying that he has a five count to get out. Jesse doesn’t stand for that (good for him) as Bundy comes in to hammer on Bigelow. Jesse: “You won’t see any hair pulling here.”. It’s off to Andre but Bigelow rolls over for the tag to Hogan and OH YEAH the fans are into this. Hogan wins a chop/slug out but gets pulled to the floor. Hogan slams Gang and Bundy….but gets counted out at 18:13, leaving even Jesse stunned. Since it’s Hogan, he refuses to leave until he is threatened with a forfeit.

So it’s Bigelow vs. Andre/Bundy/Gang as Jesse praises Gang and Bundy for being glorified pawns to get rid of Hogan. Bigelow stretches a bit before jumping on Bundy to start fast. A clothesline sets up a falling headbutt for two but a dropkick doesn’t drop Bundy. Instead Bigelow takes him down by the leg and a slingshot splash gets rid of Bundy at 20:48. It’s off to Gang, with Jesse saying he can pick which of Bigelow’s tattoos he wants to hit.

Bigelow charges into a boot in the corner so Gang goes up top (uh oh) and misses a splash, allowing Bigelow to get the pin at 23:05. That means it’s Andre vs. Bigelow and I think you know where this is going. A big right hand knocks Bigelow into the ropes but he holds on to avoid a big boot. Bigelow rolls away a few times but gets caught in the corner for the shoulders. A butterfly suplex/hiptoss finishes Bigelow at 24:21.

Rating: C+. This was more or less the semi-sequel to Hogan vs. Andre at Wrestlemania III and Andre wins to help rebuild him. The big rematch was coming later of course, but for now, Andre wins and that is enough to keep things going. The rest of the match was only so good, but what matters here is getting Andre back to being a force and making Bigelow look like the next big thing, even if he was all but done in about six months.

Post match Hogan IMMEDIATELY runs out and beats up Andre to clear the ring. Andre wants to come back in but Bobby Heenan holds him off and says not until Hogan signs on the totted line. Hogan poses a lot and yeah there’s no defending how much of a sore loser he’s being here.

In the back, Heenan and Andre say if Hogan wants Andre, sign the contract for another title match.

Hogan is STILL posing and Gorilla is STILL defending him as Jesse is thrilled at the idea of getting out of Cleveland.

A highlight package wraps us up.

Overall Rating: B. The word here is fun. This is a show that had a concept and they RAN with it, giving us a very entertaining night. No it wasn’t anything that really mattered for the most part, but some of the falls and results could be spun off for months on the house show circuit. The big there here though is that they put a bunch of people (fifty wrestlers in four matches is nuts) on the show so you were almost guaranteed to see someone you liked and it would be hard to not have a good time. I’ve seen this show more often than I can count and it absolutely holds up as a hidden gem of the Golden Era. Check this out if you can.

 

Ratings Comparison

Team Randy Savage vs. Team Honky Tonk Man

Original: B+
2012 Redo: B
2022 Redo: B-

Team Sherri Martel vs. Team Fabulous Moolah

Original: C+
2012 Redo: C+
2022 Redo: C

Team Hart Foundation vs. Team Strike Force

Original: B
2012 Redo: C-
2022 Redo: A-

Team Hogan vs. Team Andre the Giant

Original: B
2012 Redo: B-
2022 Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: A-
2012 Redo: B+
2022 Redo: B

It’s still a good show but WHAT WAS I THINKING ON THAT TAG MATCH???

Here is the original if you’re interested:

And the 2012 Redo:

 

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