Royal Rumble Count-Up – 1989: Prelude To An Explosion
Royal Rumble 1989 Date: January 15, 1989
Location: The Summit, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 19,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura
This is the first PPV version of the show and things have changed a lot. Tonight, everyone is in the match and they’re focusing more on the idea of every man being for himself. The match wouldn’t be worth anything for a few more years but things should be a little bit stronger tonight as they have a better idea what they’re doing. Let’s get to it.
We start off with a listing of presumably everyone in the Rumble tonight. If not then it’s at least most of them.
Dino Bravo/Fabulous Rougeaus vs. Jim Duggan/Hart Foundation
2/3 falls here. Anvil vs. Bravo gets things going and they collide a few times with no one going anywhere. Both guys miss elbows and it’s off to Duggan for a BIG reaction. Ray Rougeau comes in and is immediately slammed down and hit by a knee drop. Hart comes in to a small but audible reaction and gets two each off a small package and a sunset flip. Jacques comes in and things break down a bit with all three heels being caught in one corner where Anvil drives shoulders into them, crushing Ray against the corner under two other guys.
Ray FINALLY gets something in by low bridging Bret to send him to the floor. At the end of the day, when you need someone to sell something you call on Bret. Dino’s side suplex puts Bret down and The Rougeau Bomb gets the first fall. Bret and Ray start things off in the second fall with Hart in big trouble. Jacques comes in and sends Bret into the corner for the traditional chest first bump in the corner which gives Dino two.
Bravo puts on a bear hug for a bit before it’s back to Jacques. A sunset flip gives Bret a quick breather but he’s immediately put in a camel clutch. Anvil makes the save but as he’s being put back in the corner, Ray comes in and puts the same hold back on. That’s good stuff there. The heels take turns working over Bret until Jacques puts on a Boston Crab. Gorilla wants Duggan or Neidhart to come in and break the hold up, because you’ve got five seconds. I love the hypocrisy you would get from him at times.
Bret breaks the hold and tags in Anvil but the referee didn’t see it. That’s such a basic spot but you don’t see it much anymore. Ray puts on an abdominal stretch before it’s off to Jacques for the exact same hold. Bret FINALLY hits an atomic drop to break up the momentum and there’s the white hot tag to Duggan. Anvil hits a slingshot shoulder on Ray and a Duggan elbow drop ties the match up at a fall apiece.
Duggan pounds on Ray to start before going to the wrong corner to try to beat up both guys. Bravo hammers away a bit but rams Duggan’s head into the buckle for no effect at all. Duggan gets punched over into the corner and there’s the tag to Hart. Everything breaks down and Duggan hits Bravo with the board to give Hart the pin.
Rating: C. This was fine but Duggan’s reactions are amazing. The guy was probably the third most over guy in the company at this point, which is covering a lot of ground given how over some of the guys were in 1989. This was fine for an opener but the ending was never quite in doubt, which is ok.
We get a clip of some people pulling their numbers earlier. DiBiase isn’t thrilled at all and immediately goes to find Slick to work out a deal of some kind. These segments need to come back, if nothing else to try to make us believe the numbers are random. The Bushwhackers are happy with their numbers but they trade anyway. Honky is mad about his number. Bad News says his is good news. Demolition seems annoyed. Jake….you can’t tell emotion from him anyway. The Rockers don’t seem to hate theirs.
It’s time for the Super Posedown, which is exactly that: Ultimate Warrior and Rick Rude posing against each other to further their feud. Warrior is IC Champion here and man alive if this happened on a PPV today the fans would likely riot. Well not riot but boo heavily at least. Heenan actually sucks up to the fans because it’s decided by fan vote. Again, the ending here isn’t exactly in doubt. This goes on WAY too long, as it’s just posing and people booing/cheering depending on who is posing. Rude finally attacks Warrior with a bar and bails. Warrior chases after him and that’s it. This somehow took nearly fifteen minutes.
Womens’ Title: Judy Martin vs. Rockin Robin
Robin is defending and is Jake Roberts’ real life half sister. Sherri is in the ring and wants the title shot at the winner of this. Martin misses a charge and Sherri sits in on commentary. They pound on each other and it’s clear that they’re not incredibly skilled in the ring. Martin slams her down and blocks a sunset flip with a punch to the head. Robin puts on a Boston Crab as this is going nowhere.
Martin blocks an O’Connor Roll as Sherri complains about not getting a rematch yet. Gorilla talks about the process you have to go through to get a rematch, which is a nice sounding idea when you think about all the automatic title rematches you get today. Imagine that: EARNING a title match. Something resembling a DDT gets two on Martin but Robin misses an elbow drop. Martin misses one also but a backslide gets two for Judy. Robin kicks her in the face for two and gets the same off a small package. Sherri: “Come on somebody win.” Robin goes to the middle rope, fakes Martin out, and cross bodies her to retain.
Rating: D. Nothing to see here but the ending wasn’t bad. The Women’s Title would be retired about 13 months later and wouldn’t be restored until about 1993. At the end of the day, no one cares about womens wrestling other than for how small their outfits are. Robin and Martin aren’t exactly eye candy either, so this didn’t do much for anyone. At least it was short though.
Slick says the Twin Towers (Boss Man and Akeem) are probably winners of the Rumble but denies knowing anything about shenanigans with DiBiase. Sean Mooney has footage (the original Vickie Guerrer) of Slick and DiBiase together and suddenly Slick realizes he misunderstood Mooney the first time. He has no comment though.
Rude runs his mouth a bit about beating Warrior. This must be intermission.
Yep, it’s intermission as we get promos from a few managers, saying their guys are going to win. Nothing to see here but we hear from Fuji (representing the Powers of Pain), Liz (Mega Powers) and Jimmy Hart (Honky Tonk Man and Greg Valentine). Like I said, nothing to see here.
Jesse is sitting on the throne that will go to either Haku or Race. He thinks he might just run for King because the chair is comfortable.
King Haku vs. Harley Race
Race was King but got hurt and the crown went to Haku. This is his chance to get it back in a one time only return to the ring. Harley shoves over Haku’s throne to start and the brawl is on. You know Race is going to be the brawler in this. Back in and Race pounds away before suplexing Haku down for two. Heenan manages both guys here but Race is kind of the face by default.
They head to the floor again with Race being sent into the post and chopped a few times. Haku sends him back to the floor after a few seconds in the ring as we stall for a few moments. More chops have Race in trouble as Jesse talks about Hogan injuring Race, which is only kind of true. Race no sells a headbutt and gets two off a piledriver. They collide again and Race falls to the floor as Heenan plays both sides, saying he’s for both guys when the other is out of earshot.
Back in and Race punches some more before getting two off a suplex. Haku gets sent to the floor again as it’s pretty clear there’s not much to this match. Race tries to piledrive Haku on the floor but gets backdropped as is the usual. A second attempt at a piledriver works but not incredibly well. Back in and a clothesline puts Haku down for two but Haku comes back and misses a top rope headbutt. Race misses a headbutt of his own and charges into the superkick from Haku (looked GREAT) for the pin to keep the crown in Tonga or wherever he’s from.
Rating: D+. This wasn’t terrible and the ending kick looked awesome, but other than that there wasn’t much to see here. Race was clearly old and banged up and he didn’t have a lot to work with in the form of Haku. The crown was mostly a minor title that was only somewhat official. Nothing to see here, but no one cares about anything but the Rumble tonight anyway.
Time for more Rumble promos, with Beefcake, Greg Valentine (both of whom say they just need their fists), the Powers of Pain (Fuji does the talking for them), Big John Studd (freshly back in the company), Mr. Perfect (pretty new at this point) and Savage (insane of course).
DiBiase is much happier about his number now.
Heenan says the Family (Brainbusters and Andre) is ready and Andre says he’ll thrown them out if he has to. Arn whispers to Tully when Andre isn’t looking because Arn Anderson is more awesome than you.
Hogan gives his usual promo with the focus on Boss Man and Akeem this time.
Royal Rumble
The entrants are every two minutes, allegedly. #1 is Ax and #2 is Smash, beginning a tradition of having partners fight at the beginning of these matches. They immediately pound on each other and amazingly enough, they actually sell the offense. It’s a bunch of clotheslines and punches, but the key to Demolition has always been how HARD they hit each other, which is what you get a lot of here. In at #3 is Andre, which gives us one heck of a handicap match.
Demolition immediately hits a double clothesline on Andre and start demolishing him to a BIG pop. Andre is way past being past his prime here but this is still cool to see. Here’s Mr. Perfect at #4 and he strolls down the aisle, which is pretty wise for him. Andre starts fighting Demolition off and for some reason this turns into a tag match. Andre easily throws out Smash, resulting in a 2-1 attack on Andre.
The Giant fights them off and Perfect sells a headbutt as only Mr. Perfect can. Here’s Ronnie Garvin at #5 and they get Andre tied up in the ropes. The Giant breaks free and beats up Ax while Garvin and Hennig fight a bit. Andre shifts over to beat up Perfect, giving us some more awesome overselling. Greg Valentine is in at #6 to make it 4-1 against Andre. AGAIN Andre is all like BRING IT ON and knocks them away, eliminating Garvin in the process.
Andre chokes Valentine in the corner while Ax and Perfect continue their rather uninteresting fight. Andre starts choking Ax and the look on his face is eerie. Jake Roberts is #7 and Andre immediately pounds him down. Nothing of note happens for two minutes so here’s Ron Bass at #8 as Jake gets eliminated by Andre. Shawn Michaels is in at #9, giving us Ax, Perfect, Andre, Bass, Valentine and Michaels. As I type that, Perfect knocks out Ax.
Perfect throws Shawn over the top rope but some skinning the cat brings him back in. Shawn dropkicks Perfect to the apron as we get into a sell-off. #10 is Butch who gets a big pop of his own. As Butch gets in, here’s Jake Roberts again with the snake to scare Andre out of the match. The fans look at something, presumably Jake and Andre in the aisle, as things settle down a lot. It’s Honky Tonk Man at #11 as things are in that annoying slow period of most Rumbles.
Tito Santana is in at #12 to finally balance the heel/face ratio out a bit. There’s almost nothing going on here other than the energy burst you get from the new guys coming in. Bass hits a good backdrop on Michaels as Santana barely survives an attack from Valentine. Bad News Brown is #13 and Butch and Santana (there’s a pairing for you) dump Honky. Butch gets beaten up and Shawn goes up top to jump on Bad News and Bass. Marty Jannetty is #14 and the Rockers double dropkick Bass out.
Tito kills Valentine with the forearm and world champion Randy Savage is #15. NOW the place wakes up as he hammers away on Bad News. Perfect and Savage go at it in a match that would have the purists drooling. Speaking of making purists drool, Arn Anderson is #16. Savage dumps Valentine as Shawn fights Arn. Savage….saves Anderson and eliminates Shawn? Now there’s one I didn’t expect. To recap, we’ve got Marty, Anderson, Butch, Brown, Savage, Santana and Perfect in there at the moment. That’s quite the lineup for the most part.
Tully Blanchard makes the lineup even stronger at #17. Just to be clear, that’s two tag teams getting back to back numbers. Gee, what are the odds? The Brainbusters double team Marty as we’re just waiting for Hogan at this point. And here he is at #18. There goes Perfect, giving him the new Iron Man record at just under 28:00. Off camera, Savage and the Busters put Santana out as Hulk beats up Brown. Hogan fights off all three heels as Savage beats on Butch. Nice partner, especially after Hogan saved Savage when he got to the ring.
Here’s Luke at #19 as things slow down again. Butch gets thrown out after a remarkable 18 minutes. Hogan hot shots Blanchard but has to beat up Luke instead of eliminating Tully. After a brief lull, here’s Koko B. Ware at #20. After more of that epic Hulk vs. Luke showdown, Arn goes up top and is immediately slammed down by Hogan. Dude, you’re best friends with RIC FLAIR. Why would you think that’s smart? Hogan dumps Koko and Luke but gets double teamed by the Busters.
Warlord is #20 and Hogan clotheslines both Busters out at the same time. Warlord poses on the apron, gets in, and is clotheslined out in 2 seconds flat, setting a record that would last 20 years. Hogan also dumps Bad News, but it takes out Savage in the process which adds even more fuel to the Mega Powers Exploding in less than a month. Liz comes in to play peacemaker and the Powers shake hands.
Now we get the big showdown of the match as Big Boss Man is #21 and gets to face Hogan one on one. This is when Boss Man weighed like 400lbs and was just freaking fat. Hulk slams Boss Man down and pounds away in the corner but falls victim to a splash. A piledriver puts Hulk down and Boss Man stands tall. Gorilla says Hogan has been out there for half an hour (it’s been about 8 or 9 minutes) and Jesse is hilarious in freaking out.
To give us the third team back to back in this Rumble, #22 is Akeem. Hogan rams them together and slams Akeem but the numbers catch up with Hogan. After a brief comeback, a double splash crushes Hogan and he’s easily tossed. Hogan, ever the jerk, pulls Boss Man out and beats on him, which is apparently an elimination. Beefcake is #23, which means we just missed what could have been a good house show tag match.
Hogan and Boss Man brawl to the back as we get to the pretty dull third act of the Rumble. Red Rooster is #24 and helps double team Akeem a bit. They try to dump Akeem but Barbarian comes in at #25 and breaks it up. Gorilla: “That was kind of stupid.” Taylor and Akeem pair off, as do Barbarian and Beefcake and the heels take over. Akeem crushes the Rooster (Terry Taylor in case you’re some young kid) and here’s Big John Studd at #27.
Nothing of note happens there so here’s Hercules at #28. Again nothing happens so Rick Martel is #29. He goes right for Akeem but Studd shoves him away because Akeem is his big piece of chicken tonight. DiBiase is of course #30, giving us DiBiase, Akeem, Hercules, Beefcake, Studd, Barbarian, Rooster and Martel. Jesse and Gorilla have a debate about what a manager is as DiBiase throws out the Rooster to get us down to seven.
DiBiase and Barbarian team up to put out Hercules and Beefcake, leaving us with five. This last part isn’t quite death for the match but it’s certainly a bad sickness. Martel puts out the Barbarian to give us a final four. Akeem misses a splash on Martel in the corner and Rick fires off some dropkicks to no avail.
A cross body is caught and Akeem dumps Martel to get us down to Studd, Akeem and DiBiase. Akeem pounds on Studd as DiBiase gives instructions. Studd pulls Ted in front of a splash and dumps Akeem to get us down to two. DiBiase offers money but Studd shakes a finger at him. Studd actually fires off some suplexes to the shock of Monsoon. The elimination is academic and Studd wins.
Rating: C-. The last third REALLY hurts this. It’s not that it’s bad but after Hogan leaves you could almost hear a pin fall. Ha I made a wrestling joke. Also, John Studd? Really? They’ve got all those guys in there and they pick Studd to win? After Wrestlemania the guy was pretty much gone and I don’t think there was ever a clear reason for Studd winning given, other than they thought he was going to be a big deal. It’s just an odd pick and one that hindsight doesn’t look kindly on. Anyway not a terrible match but the booking hurts it.
Savage reassures himself that he’s still great. You can hear the paranoia and see the heel turn coming if you look hard enough.
Jesse and Gorilla wrap things up.
Overall Rating: D+. I can’t say this was a bad show because nothing on here is truly terrible, but it’s certainly not good either. This is very characteristic of the late 80s as other than Hogan and Savage, the stories were very limited at best. They were trying though and that’s something you can’t fake. Not a terrible show, but it’s nothing more than a moment \for the most part.
Ratings Comparison
Jim Duggan/Hart Foundation vs. Dino Bravo/Fabulous Rougeaus
Original: C+
Redo: C
Rockin’ Robin vs. Judy Martin
Original: C-
Redo: D
King Haku vs. Harley Race
Original: C
Redo: D+
Royal Rumble
Original: C+
Redo: C-
Overall Rating
Original: C-
Redo: D+
About the same again. That’s interesting compared to what happened with the Survivor Series Redos.
For my Christmas present to you, we’re looking at the strongest force in the universe: the Mega Powers.
The team got started when the Hart Foundation and Honky Tonk Man attacked Savage, causing Elizabeth to head to the back to get help. She picked Hulk Hogan for the save and the amazing handshake followed. Here they are in their first major tag match together, in the main event of Summerslam 1988.
Mega Powers vs. Mega Bucks
Jesse sends all three managers (Virgil, Heenan and Liz) to the floor but not to the back. He also makes the teams change corners for no apparent reason. Savage gets to fight Andre to start but it’s quickly off to DiBiase. He wants Hogan and gets both Hulk and an atomic drop into a right hand from Savage. Hogan pounds DiBiase as well and it’s off to Savage for some double elbows. A top rope ax handle gets two for Savage off a slow count from Ventura.
Andre comes in to beat Hogan down but Jesse is with Liz. Now the Giant comes in legally and sits on Hogan’s chest a few times before putting on a nerve hold. With DiBiase coming in sans tag, Andre chokes away with his singlet. Ted comes in legally for a near fall off a clothesline before dropping those trademark fists of his. Off to a chinlock which Gorilla swears is a choke. Hogan finally elbows his way out of the hold but a double clothesline puts both guys down.
The hot tag brings in Savage to pound away on DiBiase with right hands and a backdrop. A top rope ax handle puts DiBiase down again but Ted rams him into the top turnbuckle to change momentum again. DiBiase clotheslines Savage down and it’s off to Giant again. Andre sits on Savage in the corner which is a lot more devastating than it sounds. Back to DiBiase who gets two off a suplex. Ted goes up for a middle rope elbow, but Savage uses all of his flying elbow experience and rolls away.
Hulk comes in again off the real hot tag and cleans house on both Mega Bucks but Savage jumps into Andre’s boot. Hogan puts DiBiase in a sleeper but Andre makes the save with some headbutts. The Mega Powers are down, but Liz gets on the apron and in the most famous part of the match, takes off her skirt to reveal a bikini bottom and some nice legs. The distraction lets the Mega Powers do their big handshake and Hulk Up as one. A top rope ax handle to Andre, a flying elbow and legdrop to DiBiase later and things are pretty much done. Jesse only counts two, so Savage has to shove his hand down for the three.
Rating: B-. Much like the original Wrestlemania main event, there isn’t much to see here but it’s a fun match. It gave the fans exactly what they wanted and the Liz bit was a big surprise as she NEVER did anything sexual up to that point and rarely did after. Hogan and Savage were obviously going to win, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t a fun moment and a decent main event.
Then in the main event of Survivor Series 1988.
Team Mega Powers vs. Team Twin Towers
Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Koko B. Ware, Hillbilly Jim, Hercules
Big Bossman, Akeem, Ted DiBiase, Red Rooster, Haku
Savage is world champion and this is based on a tag team feud which would be blown off in a huge live match on February 3. Hogan comes out to his own theme music after his partners all used Savage’s. This is actually a plot point as the Mega Powers would explode because Savage thought Hogan was taking his spotlight. It’s a Wrestlemania rematch with Savage vs. DiBiase to start things off.
They knock each other down with DiBaise taking over in the corner. The champ comes back with right hands and a clothesline. Off to Hercules who is feuding with DiBiase as Ted had called Hercules a slave, prompting a face turn. Instead Herc gets the Red Rooster who doesn’t do well at all, which is the idea. Heenan said he could take anyone, even Rooster, to the top. Off to Koko who gets in a shot to Ware and it’s off to Akeem (One Man Gang).
Haku comes in with a chop but misses a legdrop and it’s back to Herc. I’m not sure why when you have Hogan and Savage on the apron but whatever. Now it’s off to Hogan and the place erupts. He takes Haku down and drops some elbows before bringing Hillbilly in for a quick main event opportunity. Akeem comes in and runs Jim over before bringing Rooster in. Even Gorilla found that stupid. Jim doesn’t do much to Rooster so here’s Koko instead.
Rooster rams Koko’s head into the buckle, but see, Koko is black so it doesn’t hurt. A missile dropkick gets two on Red and it’s off to Hogan. The big boot sets up Savage’s elbow and it’s 5-4. Hogan’s team has a massive in ring celebration while Bossman’s team hits the floor. Heenan rips into Rooster as we get Savage vs. Haku. Haku chokes on the ropes but Hogan makes a blind tag and, brace yourselves, actually loses a slugout!
Haku hits a nice dropkick but gets slammed down and it’s off to Herc. A suplex puts Hercules down and it’s off to Akeem. A splash misses and it’s off to Hillbilly who fires away with all he’s got. Jim’s big boot doesn’t take Akeem down and a clothesline floors Jim. The 747 (big splash) gets the pin and we’re tied up. Koko comes in and dropkicks Akeem in the back before wisely bringing in Hogan to do the heavy lifting.
Back to the world champ with a double ax to the head but they can’t knock Akeem down. Hercules pounds away a bit as does Koko with a dropkick only sending Akeem into the corner. Akeem shrugs it off and hits Koko once to take over. Off to Boss Man who hits his namesake slam to make it 4-3. It’s Hogan in now and this is the match everyone has been wanting to see.
Hogan pounds him into the corner and everyone left on Hogan’s team (Hogan, Savage, Hercules vs. Bossman, Akeem, DiBiase, Haku) gets in a shot. Hogan easily slams the then bigger Boss Man but he charges into a spinebuster. That looked really good too. Back to Akeem and the big men hit a double elbow to take Hulk down. Off to Haku who gets in some shots to the neck before tagging in Boss Man. I wonder why they’ve gone so long since having DiBiase in there.
Naturally as I say that he comes in and clotheslines Hogan down. A falling punch gets two but Hogan Hulks Up. Off to Hercules for some revenge and some hard clotheslines and punches. Virgil trips him up though and a school boy eliminates Hercules. It’s now 4-2 but Savage charges in and rolls up DiBiase to pin him within about ten seconds.
Haku comes in again but misses a headbutt, allowing Hogan to get the tag. Something like a superkick takes Hulk down and it’s back to Boss Man for some headbutts tot he back. Akeem comes in for his usual shots before it’s back to Haku again, who suplexes Hulk for two. It’s nerve hold time followed by the Boss Man Slam for no cover. Instead Boss Man goes up and misses a splash.
The hot tag brings in Savage who cleans house. Slick trips Randy up and things slow down again. Boss Man puts on a bearhug as Slick goes after Liz, grabbing her by the arm. Hulk makes the save and DRILLS Slick with a right hand. The Towers go to handcuff Hogan to the rope but Boss Man gets counted out in the process. Boss Man beats on Hogan with the nightstick and then goes to beat on Savage. Akeem helps with that, drawing a DQ for himself and getting us down to Hogan and Savage vs. Haku.
Hogan is still cuffed to the rope though so it’s basically a one on one match. Haku beats on Savage as the camera is on the Towers leaving. Slick has the keys and is taunting Hogan with them. Savage holds the rope and avoids a kick but there’s no Hogan to tag. Haku accidentally superkicks Slick and Liz raids his pocket to get the key. Hogan is freed and Haku hits a top rope splash for two. Hot tag to Hogan and since it’s 1988, you can fill in the ending for yourself.
Rating: C+. While not great, this was better than the previous match to be sure. This would be part of the Mega Powers Exploding, as Savage would be jealous of Hogan for getting the glory and not being there for him earlier in the match. It’s no classic or anything, but 80s Hogan is always fun.
This led to the big showdown at the second Main Event. The story here though is the post match promo, which I’ll throw in as a bonus.
Twin Towers vs. Mega Powers
This is an hour long show and the match is over twenty minutes long so if you didn’t get the idea, this is the only reason to watch this show. After the Towers get to the ring, we get a video about Hogan and Savage. This isn’t your typical video however. This is set to a WAY too upbeat song called You’re A Friend Of Mine by Clarence Clemens Jackson Browne. Look it up and picture a highlight package of Hogan and Savage. It looks like the intro to a REALLY bad sitcom. I can’t make this stuff up people.
Hogan and Savage say there is no issue with these three. The underlying theme here is that Hogan allegedly loves Liz but Hogan insists it’s just like a brother and sister. In short, this became about Hogan which Savage didn’t like which has to be at least half legitimate. Everyone talks a lot here and hey now let’s have a match.
Boss Man starts and Savage and Hogan both want to start for their team. Boss Man wants Hogan so Savage can’t get his way again. Hogan looks especially orange tonight. The heels are cleared out by Super Hogan alone and the fans are WAY into it. The little things in this match like Savage wearing Hogan’s colors with the words Mega Powers written on them but Hogan wearing his usual gear is very well done.
Akeem comes in and here’s Savage to meet him. Oh wait never mind Hogan needs to come back in. He even comes off the second rope to work on the arm a bit. Boss Man hits a Piledriver and Hogan does his fish out of water dance on the mat. I’m not sure if it looks more like that or a steak being grilled. One or the other. Jesse points out that Hogan is hogging the ring time and he’s absolutely right at this point.
Slick gets involved so Savage drills him in the face. Spinebuster which is unnamed at this point gets two. Savage finally comes in this has been ALL Mega Powers. Top rope cross body puts Akeem down but Slick gets a shot in to take down the Macho Man and momentum shifts. Savage is still world champion here if I didn’t mention that and you’re not familiar with this era.
And now we get to the meat of this show. Akeem throws Savage to the floor and he wipes Elizabeth out, landing right on top of her (lucky). She’s GONE and Hogan goes to try to help her which ticks Savage off for some reason. “Oh no the woman I love is getting helped after I was incapacitated! SCREW THAT!” Hogan carries Liz to the back in as dramatic a fashion as possible. He leaves with her as they check her out.
We get the other fun part of this as Hogan’s acting is at its peak here. Keep in mind we stay on Hogan and Liz for like 3 minutes with ZERO talk of what’s going on in the ring. Back from a break we get a bumper of the match and now back to General Wrestling Hospital. Hogan keeps saying thank God and making weird noises. I don’t have the video up as I’m typing here and the sounds are just disturbing. Leaving out the word God it’s God Elizabeth God Elizabeth and random moaning and groaning and breathing sounds.
FINALLY he realizes he’s left his partner for like ten minutes against two monsters so he comes back for the save and the glory. Oh but instead of like, I don’t know, GETTING IN THE RING and beating the tar out of one of the guys and helping Savage, he gets on the apron and grabs the tag rope. Savage continues to do all of the work and beats up Boss Man but won’t tag Hogan.
Savage slaps Hogan nice and hard and leaves him. Serves the bald pest right too. Macho stands on the floor and then leaves with his belt. For once Hogan has absolutely no one to blame but himself here. More on that later though. Air Africa (Akeem’s splash) hits Hogan, he Hulks Up, Boss Man apparently asks Slick if he knows where he can find a good turkey on rye as he pays NO attention to what’s going on and Hogan gets the pin.
Rating: C. Total angle here with a match as the backdrop but this was a big deal to put it mildly. This would be like Orton turning on Cena when they had been best friends for like a year. The match is just ok but that’s all it needed to be. Hogan’s hammy acting aside, this was perfectly fine for what it was.
Hogan goes to the back where Savage is losing his mind, talking about how the champion is supposed to be #1 to Liz who is laying on the table with apparently NO ONE checking on her at all. We now get the greatest promo of Savage’s career as he just goes off on Hogan, ranting and raving about how Hogan has stolen the spotlight from him since day one and how if Hogan wanted a title shot all Hogan had to do was ask and he would have beaten him 1-2-3.
He talks about how Hogan is jealous and lusting after Liz before DRILLING with the belt and beating the living heck out of Hogan in probably the biggest heel turn in company history at the time. I’d put it ahead of Andre as it was on a bigger stage and Savage’s promo was better.
Beefcake comes in for the save and Savage just ends him with like two shots, showing how worthless he was at the time. Savage leaves Hogan laying. Totally AWESOME segment and one of the best promos that I can ever remember anywhere with Savage letting out a year of frustration and paranoia all on Hogan with everything he said making perfect sense for once. Great segment and well worth checking out.
The team would split up for about six years after this, not reuniting until Clash of the Champions XXX in 1995. This match has one of the most amazing ideas you’ll ever see in wrestling.
Kevin Sullivan/Butcher vs. Hulk Hogan/Randy Savage
Vader gets in Hogan’s face during the entrances and Flair is back in his seat. Hogan throws Butcher into the corner to start and a running clothesline puts him on the mat. Savage comes in off the top with an ax handle to Butcher’s head before bringing Sullivan in for a beating as well. Back to Hogan as we look over Vader’s shoulder. Hulk runs over Butcher but gets caught in the sleeper. Savage tries to make the save twice in a row but Hogan is out cold.
Butcher lets go so Savage tries to wake Hogan up to no avail. With nothing else to do, Savage goes to the top and drops his signature elbow drop, causing Hogan to Hulk Up as he does every time he gets hit with a finishing move. It makes sense in that twisted wrestling logic. I mean….how freaking brilliant is that when you really think about it? Hogan fights back as everything breaks down with Savage being thrown over the top rope and out to the floor. Sullivan sends Randy into the post and then the barricade as the villains take over.
Savage takes a beating from both guys and is thrown to the floor again. He gets up quickly but can barely stay on his feet. Back in and Savage is tied up in the Tree of Woe (hanging upside down in the corner), drawing in Hogan for a failed save attempt. Butcher puts Savage in the sleeper but Randy breaks out with a jawbreaker. Hogan gets the hot tag and cleans house before Savage drops the elbow on Butcher. The legdrop is enough to get the pin.
Rating: D+. There wasn’t much to this one. The match felt like any other Hogan vs. monsters match but the monsters were Kevin Sullivan and the Butcher. At the end of the day, Hogan vs. someone smaller than him very rarely works and these two just weren’t going to cut it. The Reviving Elbow was a stroke of brilliance though.
Here’s a major showdown at Slamboree 1995.
Hulk Hogan/Randy Savage vs. Ric Flair/Vader
Hmm, Flair and Hogan in a big match. I wonder what’s going to happen in the end. I have no idea why I’m bothering to watch this as the ending is as obvious as physically possible. Bischoff makes sure to point out that the fans came to see Hogan. He ignores the other probably 15 world titles in the ring, not to mention everyone else on the card. Renegade of course gets his own entrance, being the least talented of the 6.
Anderson has to pretend to be afraid of him and this is just stupid. Vader and Hogan start us off here. Vader would be gone in a few months to WWF to be replaced by the returning Luger. The faces are completely dominating here. Flair cheats to take over as you can see why this match means nothing at all: the match means nothing at all. It’s a tag match that proves nothing either way. Hogan will still be champion no matter what so why would I want to see this match? That makes no sense at all.
Oh look Hogan is beating up Flair. That’s a relief. For a minute there I thought WCW might be doing something new. I couldn’t handle that! The heels finally take over for a bit here. Oh and there was an appearance of a guy that we couldn’t see clearly. He would become known as the Giant, or later on as he’s known now, the Big Show.
They very kind of imply that he looks like Andre, which would be where they went with it. Vader screws up and shoves the referee across the ring. Naturally since that’s not the finish though he lets it go. The Vader Bomb hits but we have no cover. One from the top misses though and both he and Hogan are down. Yep still not interesting. Oh and Hogan might have died had that top rope Bomb hit. Did Savage vs. Vader ever happen?
That could have been decent. Flair gets slammed off the top for the second time in the match. That can’t be fun. Arn interferes to let the heels take over again. Renegade is fierce apparently. The moonsault hits on Savage and as Hogan makes the save he kicks out anyway. Just a reminder: Angelo Poffo is IN THE HALL OF FAME.
Hogan gets the hot tag and of course, beats the tar out of Flair. After a melee and some botched interference from Anderson, say it with me, HOGAN PINS FLAIR!!! The heels beat up Savage afterwards and then they beat up Angelo Poffo to the shock of no one as no one cares. Savage vs. Flair was the main event of the Great American Bash.
Rating: C+. Not bad I guess. It’s your standard main event tag match with nothing on the line which I never like at all. It was your run of the mill stuff with the heels beating down the faces for a good while until the heels mess up. Nothing too hardcore but nothing bad either.
Time for WarGames at Fall Brawl 1995.
WarGames: Hulkamaniacs vs. Dungeon of Doom
Dungeon: Meng, Kamala, Shark, Zodiac
Hulkamaniacs: Hulk Hogan, Lex Luger, Sting, Randy Savage
Gee, thing it’s one sided enough??? Luger replaced Vader who jumped to WWF a week earlier. They say a stipulation has been added where if Team Hogan wins, he gets 5 minutes with the Taskmaster in the cage tonight. They announced that earlier but maybe the crowd didn’t know yet. Now remember, we have Hogan, Luger, Sting and Savage, a WCW All-Star team vs. Kamala, Haku, Brutus Beefcake and Earthquake. Yeah this is a main event apparently.
Ok to be fair, this is the major feud in the company in their signature match so that makes sense. I have no issue there. I just don’t think this is the best they could do. Why not Flair and Anderson with two other guys? It would at least be more interesting. Sting and Shark start us off. More or less Sting massacres him as you would expect. Shark finally gets some offense in after Sting goes for a slam like the idiot he tended to be.
Sting is one of my favorites ever, but he did some DUMB stuff at times. In a funny spot, Shark goes to the end of one ring and after a running start, JUMPS OVER THE ROPE. However he doesn’t make it all the way as he gets stuck on the two sets of ropes over the gap in the rings. What a visual.
With 30 seconds to go before another guy comes in, Sting goes for the leg. With three seconds to go the Scorpion is on. The heels win the toss (naturally) and Zodiac comes in. In a cool spot, Sting grabs the top of the cage and pulls himself up and kicks Zodiac in the head. Sting does what he can but there is too much fat in there.
Savage comes in to tie it up. Like a crazy man he tries to suplex Shark. Are we really supposed to believe Sting and Savage can’t handle these two? The cage isn’t that great so Savage’s leg is hanging out of the cage and the heels are beating on it. His partners ignore him of course so there we are. Kamala comes in as it’s 3-2. Has Kamala ever won a big match? I don’t think so.
Luger makes it 3-3. There just isn’t much to say about this match as the periods are too short to really get anything going. Also the face team is so ridiculously stacked that there’s no drama whatsoever. Luger accidently hits Savage to attempt to give us some drama as Meng comes in to make it 4-3. Ok now why would Meng hit Luger there? Savage is using energy and hurting Luger so why stop him? The heels dominate for the rest of the period and here he is.
Hogan is the final guy in of course and he has powder. Not only does he have a far better roster of guys but he comes in and cheats. That’s Hogan for you I guess. Naturally he beats up the four guys more or less on his own when Sting, Luger and Savage combined couldn’t do it. That makes perfect sense right?
Heenan says this is like Bosnia. Even Tony stops him on that one. It’s just total domination here as you would expect. This is totally boring at this point as there is no way the heels are winning it. And Hogan gets a TERRIBLE camel clutch on Zodiac for the submission to win.
Rating: D. And that’s with an elevated rating due to it being WarGames. This was just AWFUL as it was so painfully boring. There was never any drama at all. I mean look at the rosters. Would you believe for a second that Hogan’s team was ever going to lose? Of course not and no one bought the heels as having a chance. It could have been worse I guess. Ok no it couldn’t be. One of the weakest WarGames ever.
Here’s a big showdown that could have made a fortune in the 80s, but we get it on Nitro, January 8, 1996.
Ric Flair/Arn Anderson vs. Randy Savage/Hulk Hogan
Lot of time left for this one too. Savage is wearing yellow and red and there are now pictures of Hogan on the floor in the aisle. Oh and this company doesn’t have has beens. They have the best in the world today. In WWF at this point it was Shawn Michaels rising to the top of the company. These jokes write themselves. Savage vs. Flair starts us off officially after a quick tag from Arn.
Flair is champion here and these two would eventually fight for the title at the PPV. Ok never mind as it’s Hogan vs. Flair starting out. Well why have Savage have a competitive match when we can have Flair get beaten up by Hogan? We get to a technical mat based style to start and of course Hogan wins that. A chop does nothing at all but a thumb to the eye of baldie takes him down.
The big boot takes Flair down again and here’s Arn so Hogan can beat up both of them on his own for awhile. Arn comes in as does Savage who of course has a bit more difficulty since he’s not Hogan after all. Double axe off the top gets two for Savage. After running away from Hogan for a bit Flair comes in and gets caught in a Figure Four by Savage. Hogan gets one on Anderson also as the Horsemen look like idiots already.
The Horsemen break up the holds with eye rakes as we take a break. Back with Savage in trouble in an abdominal stretch at the hands of Anderson. Savage gets his foot on the rope but Hogan makes sure to come in anyway to ensure that he gets credit for the save. Savage gets a quick sleeper but Anderson gets out with relative ease. The REAL Figure Four is blocked into a small package for two and then another one for two also.
Eric: Hogan is the freshest man in that ring right now and he wants in that ring. He’s on the apron when Eric says that of course. Flair knees Savage into Hogan and of course he beats up both guys on his own again. McMichael says the plan apparently was for Savage to take care of the Horsemen and then Hogan comes in and cleans house. I’ll let you figure out why that’s nauseating.
Anderson hits the spinebuster and Hogan of course pops up. This is getting sickening. The crowd isn’t popping for this stuff either. Hogan gets the boot and the legdrop for the pin but the Dungeon and the Horsemen run out for a big brawl as Giant beats up Hogan in the ring. Chokeslam for Savage too ends the show.
Rating: D+. Meh, it’s a main event tag match and Hogan gets to be praised and worshipped some more. What else is new really? This naturally was a way for Hogan to look dominant over everyone else and have them all be glorified cannon fodder before we set up the next match against Giant which SUCKED. Not horrible but it’s the same stuff we’ve seen for months now.
Here’s the setup for SuperBrawl VI at Clash of the Champions XXXII.
Randy Savage/Hulk Hogan vs. Ric Flair/The Giant
Savage has a bad arm coming in, which is an injury he had for months. Giant is called a legend despite having his first match about three months ago. Savage and Hogan have a line of women with them, including Woman and Elizabeth. Kevin Greene comes in before there’s any contact and gets down in a three point stance, sending Flair out side. Savage winds up starting with Flair and sends Ric outside where he eats a boot from Hogan.
Back inside and a slap sends Flair into the corner but he comes out with a thumb to the eye to take over. A big right hand sends Randy down but he grabs a backslide for two. The tag brings in Giant and he wants Hogan. Hulk gets a tag as well and Giant shoves him into the corner with ease. Giant easily shoulder blocks Hogan down and blocks a slam with a big forearm over the back. Hogan gets slammed though as the announcers talk about Andre the Giant vs. Hogan in 1987 without mentioning Wrestlemania.
A headbutt to the lower abdomen has Hulk in even more trouble and a backbreaker makes it even worse. Hulk avoids an elbow drop and actually gets the body slam. It hurts him more than Giant though and the bigger man is able to make the tag off to Flair. Ric scores with a suplex but Hogan pops up and takes Flair down with some clotheslines. Jimmy Hart distracts the referee and Giant takes Hulk to the floor for a bearhug. They head inside again and Hogan no sells the chops but runs into an elbow in the corner.
Flair goes up top and of course gets slammed off top, allowing for the tag to Savage. The fans don’t react in the slightest which can’t be a good sign. A top rope ax handle drops Flair and Savage hits the big elbow but Hart offers another distraction. He also throws Flair a foreign object, allowing Ric to knock Savage senseless for the pin.
Rating: C. The match was nothing special but it sets up another Flair vs. Savage match, presumably at SuperBrawl IV. Hogan vs. Giant was your usual stuff for Hulk fighting a monster but it was nice to see him get in trouble and not be able to just beat up Giant with ease. A double main event would seem likely for the pay per view.
Time for a six man tag with the Mega Powers lackey Brutus Beefcake as Booty Man. From Nitro, February 26, 1996.
Ric Flair/Kevin Sullivan/Arn Anderson vs. Booty Man/Hulk Hogan/Randy Savage
This is going to get a lot of time here. Big brawl right from the bell and the faces clear the ring of course. Arn wants time and doesn’t get it. He has to settle for a guy named Booty Man smacking him in the face. That’s your official starting pair and as they stare each other down, here comes Kimberly, the Diamond Doll, to stare at Booty Man. Who came up with that idea for a gimmick? I mean…..did Billy Gunn rip that off?
High Knee (get it?) sends Anderson to the corner as we’re spending a lot of time standing around. Booty Man beats up everyone as I think Anderson is still legal. Apparently not as it’s off to Flair. They can’t seem to go more than 10 seconds without pausing for something or other. Test of strength is won by Beefcake (that’s who it is if I didn’t mention that) as he’s been in there the entire time.
Off to Savage because Savage vs. Flair hasn’t been done in a whole week at this point. Savage clears the ring as apparently there’s no Nitro the next week. Good to know. Hogan comes in to beat on Flair because that’s what he does. This has bee a total wreck so far. A double big boot by Hogan and Billy Gunn’s inspiration gets two on Flair. The heels haven’t been in control yet.
Woman finally does something and grabs Savage’s leg to let Sullivan take over. Savage gets beaten on for a good while both in and out of the ring. He gets a shot in to take Kevin down and it’s back off to Booty Man. Not like Hogan should have to do anything you know. Booty Man sends everyone into Hogan’s boot and the leg drop ends Anderson.
Rating: D. Just a big mess here with the heels looking like idiots for the sake of another of Hogan’s buddies. Flair was world champion here but you’d never know it based on what he had to do every week for the sake of Hogan and company. Very weak main event all around and guess what the main event of the next show is?
From two weeks later on Nitro, March 11, 1996.
Hulk Hogan/Randy Savage/Booty Man vs. Kevin Sullivan/Arn Anderson/Ric Flair
Everyone will have straps that they can use here. There are also lumberjacks around the ring. Giant immediately grabs Hogan and the fight is on. Giant and Loch Ness mess up and hit each other so they get into a brawl of their own. That would be an ugly match at Uncensored. Every one is in the Foley flannel here. Booty Man and Sullivan are the only ones using the straps.
Kimberly comes down to stare at Beefcake/Booty Man. Egads. There don’t seem to be tags required in this. Flair tries to leave but Animal carries him back to the ring. This is more or less a riot instead of an actual match. There is absolutely nothing to say here as everything is all over the place. Hogan beats up some lumberjacks including DDP. Like I said, total mess here with nothing resembling a coherent match.
Flair and Hogan are FINALLY strapped together as Hogan still has a bad eye. No other pair is strapped together. Oh wait they’re not. They all have straps of their own. Shouldn’t that be something clear from the beginning? Big boot and leg drop to Flair out of nowhere end this. One of the biggest messes I’ve ever seen.
Rating: D-. This wasn’t even a match but rather just a mess. Was there a point to this at all? The lumberjacks barely paid attention to the match at all and just brawled the entire time. There was no way to tell what was going on and that’s not a good thing. Just an overbooked mess with no way of telling what happened at all. Not liking it at all.
One more brawl on Nitro, March 18, 1996.
Ric Flair/Kevin Sullivan vs. Randy Savage/Hulk Hogan
Naturally nothing Flair does works on Hogan because why in the world would we want the world champion to look impressive? Hogan puts a Macho Man foam hat on Flair’s head and beats on him even more. Eric points out that Hogan has already beaten everyone. That was basically the idea behind this match: we had no one left to face him so let’s just have him fight everyone at once. How well do you think this went over?
This has been mostly Hogan vs. Flair and remember they don’t have to tag here as it’s Texas (despite being in Tennessee) Tornado rules. We go split screen with both screens maybe filling in a quarter of the screen. You know, because we need a split screen for Savage alone pulling himself up. Eric keeps babbling about Dennis Rodman possibly being at Uncensored which of course he wasn’t at.
They switch off Flair takes Savage down. That can’t happen though so Hogan hammers away on him instead. Finally the heels take over for a bit and it’s a Figure Four on Savage. Instead of SAVING HIS PARTNER Hogan puts one on Taskmaster. Savage reverses his and Flair lets it go. Flair shoves the referee so the referee shoves Flair.
Here comes the Mega Powers as it’s 10PM so we’re going to stay with it, since the C in WCW stands for Commitment! Hogan and Flair slug it out and guess who wins there. Split screen time again as the heels are in control. Luckily this one doesn’t last as long as Sullivan chokes away at Hogan. More slugging out as the Mega Powers get going again.
Woman pops Hogan in the bad eye again but Hogan launches Flair off again as is his custom. He Hulks Up and here comes Anderson. Anderson saves Flair from the leg drop and Brian Pillman comes out with a chair and it’s a double DQ. In a Texas Tornado match, there was a double DQ. And people have the nerve to wonder why this company was looked down upon as being idiotic?
Rating: D. I’m getting REALLY tired of these brawls. They were fun at first but when you know what’s coming and that there’s no chance that Hogan and Savage will flat out lose they lose their luster really fast. Not a fan of these things and thankfully they’ll calm way down after this week’s show.
This led to my favorite review of all time, in the main event of Uncensored 1996. I’ll include the package to set it up as a bonus.
We recap the feud with Hogan and Savage against the Alliance. More or less what happened was simple: the Alliance challenged Hogan to a 4-1 cage match, but WCW wised up and realized Hogan carrying a match like that could expose him too much, so they threw Savage in there too.
Now, how did the Alliance put out this challenge? Was it by beating down Hogan? Was it by destroying something he held dear and valuable? Was it by making threats to his family and home? Nope to all three. They sent him a telegram. Let me repeat that. The feud and match were set by a group sending Hogan a telegram. That’s so freaking stupid I can’t even make fun of it. I truly can’t.
They sent him a telegram. I can’t get over that. Something else I notice: there hasn’t been a single mention of Randy Savage all show. It’s been nothing but Hogan. The team is known as the Alliance to End Hulkamania. In the build up from the announcers there’s no mention of Savage. What in the world is wrong with these people? Why am I trying to figure that out?
Hulk Hogan/Randy Savage vs. Alliance to End Hulkamania
The Alliance is Ric Flair, Arn Anderson, Meng, Barbarian, Lex Luger, Taskmaster (Kevin Sullivan), Z-Gangsta (Zeus from the late 80s) and Ultimate Solution (big fat strong guy that never did anything other of note in wrestling. He did play Bane in Batman and Robin though in case anyone is interested.) Now you might be wondering how this is going to work.
Well until about 3 minutes before the bell rings, so was everyone else. Literally, they didn’t know what they were going to do until the day of the show. That’s your brilliant wrestling company at work. The idea would be this. You have a ring with three cages on top of it. In other words, there’s a ring with a cage over it that’s very tall and has a top of in. The top of that cage is the floor of a second cage. That cage has six sides, all made of cage.
There’s ANOTHER of those on top. The match starts up at the top for no apparent reason. The idea is that it’s more or less a gauntlet match. There’s two guys on top, four in the middle cage and two in the bottom cage and Hogan and Savage have to win in all three cages. Yep, that’s it.
In a match that’s supposed to be all about violence and called a Doomsday match, we have a freaking gauntlet with regular pins and submissions. Let’s get to this. Michael Buffer is in the ring doing introductions for this as I have a feeling that this is going to take a LONG time.
He asks if they’re ready. He asks it again. I wonder if they’re going to break it down after the match. The cage I mean. Oh Brian Pillman is supposed to be in this but he’s left for ECW at this time where he would be for all of a day or so and then on to WWF. Flair comes out sans belt or any acknowledgment that he’s champion so you can see where the priorities are.
Oh we also have to wait for them to all climb up the steps to get to their cages too. Barbarian has been banned from wrestling in most countries in the world too. You learn something new every day. Zeus (I refuse to refer to him as Z-Gangsta more than I have to) and Ultimate Solution aren’t here yet. His original name was Final Solution. I’ll give you two guesses as to how that went.
So we’re starting with Anderson and Flair at the top so we’re starting with the Mega Powers vs. Anderson and Flair. Tell me, what’s wrong with that as a main event? I’d like that FAR better. Luger left WWF for this. That’s just sad. They finally just give up and call Hogan a superhero. Naturally the camera follows him up the stairs as my fear of heights is kicking in.
Dusty says the fans have been waiting for days in and around this building. Just go with it. Once they finally reach the top we start immediately and also immediately we see the massive problem: the fans can’t see a stupid thing. They’re about thirty feet from the ground (which of course hits as high as 65 so far according to Brain) and the lighting is awful.
Also, this is before the days of the Titantron. If they had that, this would be ok. No actually it wouldn’t be but it would have been better. The people watching the PPV from home have a hard time seeing this so imagine what it’s like for the fans there. They’re dead quiet too after the opening maybe 10 seconds because reality has set in. Oh Arn is wearing a full black body suit for no apparent reason.
Heenan says what I think might have been hidden jabs at WCW by saying “What a great thing for television!” and “Only here in WCW!” Those are either fed to him or shots at the brilliant minds who came up with this. Actually no. They’re not worthy of sarcastic praise. They’re freaking idiots. I mean seriously, WHAT ARE THEY THINKING???
If you’re going to do a cage match, fine. If you’re going to do a big cage match, fine. If you’re going to do a gauntlet cage match, that’s fine too. Actually that’s kind of an interesting concept. However, DO IT WHERE THE PEOPLE CAN SEE IT. My goodness how hard of a concept is that? What’s the most important aspect of any show? How about being able to see it?
The fans here might be able to make out someone next to one side of the cage but other than that, nothing. And don’t even bother staying if you sit across the arena and don’t have binoculars because you’re screwed. Sting and Booker won the main event already. I can’t get over how ridiculous this is. Seriously who thought this was a good idea?
Oh and there’s a referee up there too even though it’s Uncensored and therefore unsanctioned. There’s also a massive pole in the middle in case Hogan wants to shoot a Brooke Hogan video up there. They go to a wide shot to just further show how stupid this is. We can hear the wrestlers talking which is usually covered up by the crowd.
Maybe they can see as there’s a pop for Hogan ripping the shirt off. Heenan says this is better than the World Series or the Super Bowl. Yes it does Bobby, yes it does. Hey we’ve hit 70 feet in the air! Heenan redeems himself a bit with the line of all a manager can do here is hope they have a client in the morning. We get a random reference to some woman named Becky in Denver. Ok then.
Tony sums up the match perfectly: the fans wanted to know what the Doomsday Cage was so they’re finding out here. Well thanks for that Tony. In other words, we’re going to throw out a cool sounding name and say Hogan is in it against a bunch of guys that we’re only going to vaguely mention and say to find out, pay up. Once you hook them, you don’t have to do anything.
They did the same thing with the Elimination Chamber in 2002, but the difference was that match wasn’t bad. It certainly wasn’t great but I’ve seen far worse matches. Exhibit A is being reviewed at the moment. In the ultra violent match, we get double figure fours.
Heenan’s comedy is all that’s holding the pieces of this in place. Notice I didn’t say together but just in place as they would likely want to run away and join a witness protection program or something. Zeus and Solution didn’t wrestle again after this. They were the smart ones I guess.
Dusty says if you have a chain length fence (who doesn’t?) just go lay on it to see what this is like. Bobby: Then call your neighbor over and slap the figure four on him! Then put the figure eight on your Doberman! Bobby Heenan, I love you very much. You need massive amounts of therapy and medication, but I love you.
Flair drops something from one cage to the other which is never explained or mentioned again. My guess would be the will of Flair’s career since it’s dead at this point. Hogan and Savage throw powder, which is likely the remains of the cocaine they needed to agree to this.
They go through a trapdoor to get to the next cage, and Anderson and Flair are eliminated. WOW. Ok so wait. All they had to do was get through a door? They didn’t have to pin someone or get a tap out but just go through a door? Ladies and gentlemen, I’m done. I’m going to stop trying to make sense of this match and that’s all there is to it.
This just doesn’t make sense at all but for some reason they insist that it does. Bobby says Boris Karloff would love this. Not really but ok. Hogan has a chain and beats on Sullivan with it. They’re down about 12 feet now so the crowd is a bit more into it. It’s the Faces of Fear (Meng and Barbarian) on Savage and Luger and Sullivan on Hogan.
This room has a door in the middle of it so it’s like two small cages. Actually there’s a reason for it though which will come up in a minute. After being beaten on by two grown men and a steel chain, Hogan is fine and manages to get the chain away to lock the door (which didn’t have a lock before but whatever) and trap Meng and Barbarian inside.
A shot of the cage from the floor makes this look a lot better as in essence they’re fighting on top of a regular cage. That’s not bad I guess. Anderson and Flair drop to the second cage and are trapped as well. Where’s my wah wah music when I need it? Heenan says it’s a maze with no way in or out.
Yep other than the doors they came in through, the doors they leave through or the path that the referee points them through to get to the end. Speaking of doors they go out of one and fight on the stairs which is kind of scary when you think about it as there’s no wall to save them there.
Sullivan is actually over halfway out as Heenan says that he’ll be spam if he hits. I’ll infract him if he does. I don’t want any freaking spam in my reviews. Savage and Luger are still in the cage by the way. According to Brain everyone is on their feet. They have to be to see this I suppose. They’re more or less quiet by the way.
Luger gets loose and we’re out on the floor. Yep, they got out of the cage and while the rules stated earlier in the match said that Hogan and Savage just needed to get down to win, they apparently are going to keep going. Hey, we’re having a Doomsday Cage Match, so let’s fight in the ring!
Yep, they’re fighting in the ring. Luger and Savage are fighting by the cage with Hogan and Sullivan in the ring. The four guys in the upper cage break out and head down the cage. Now this could be cool: Hogan and Savage 6-2 in the arena. Well ok I can go with that as at least its easier to see.
It’s more or less the same thing as the previous match but…that’s….why are the other four just leaving? They just walked back to the dressing room. Anderson and Flair are supposed to, but the Faces of Fear are still in this legally, but who cares about that? That would MAKE SENSE!
Hogan is beating on Luger in the ring while Savage is having boards thrown at him.
Apparently the Faces of Fear have been eliminated. Oh ok I think I’ve got it now: the rules are as follows. Hogan and Savage had to go to the top of the cage where they had to either pin or get a submission from Flair and Anderson but they were allowed to have an alternate way of winning because Hogan made a large donation to the Save the Wombat Foundation.
Next up they had to get pins or submissions on some combination of the Faces of Fear, Sullivan or Luger, but they were able to lock the Faces of Fear into a cage and therefore receive a Federal credit for preventing an international assault and battery charge since both men are international ambassadors sent by the King of Tonga to study wrestling (that’s actually not made up if you can believe that. That’s legit true).
Now at the beginning the rules stated that they simply had to get to the floor to win, however there was a clause stating that if there was a high percentage (17 or greater) of time spent on discussing the social habits of Bulgarian monks in the 15th century by the four in the second cage during the battle in the first cage, then simply getting to the floor wouldn’t be classified as a win.
In that case a pin in the other ring would work. However, that won’t work either because Lex Luger’s lawyers feel that the population of fire ants in this match were misrepresented so therefore a simple pin in the ring won’t work either, and the final two members of the Alliance to End Hulkamania, which has founded new chapters in Laos, Manhattan and the North Pole, fighting off the evils of Hulk-Chi-Min, Hulk Maritoni and Hulk-a-Claus, must be equally represented in this match, which must end via pinfall in the original ring.
HOWEVER, it will be allowed for former members of the Alliance to reenter the match under the Columbus Act which also founded Ohio in 1776, but also said that wrestlers were unlawfully evicted from the match via an international treaty can be allowed to return. ANYWAY, now that we’re back to the match, let’s continue here but I need to make sure this remains logical. It’s very important to keep that going here.
They’re all at the ring now and we have more bad chair shots. I love how the graphic under the split screen says Doomsday Cage Match despite a significant lack of cage. Here’s Ultimate Solution and Zeus. According to the clause listed above, we head back to the original cage for the showdown. Yep, it’s Hogan and Savage in a no tag tag-team match against two big strong guys. How do they come up with these things?
Sullivan is lurking around as I feel he needs to register. I’m sure there’s something in this match for him too. There must be a tournament somewhere. As if this wasn’t riveting enough, we hit a bear hug. Hey now, it’s time for the rematch of the match that didn’t happen seven years ago in another company that we’re not going to mention but imply that everyone knows anyway because that’s how we roll.
Ultimate Solution (hereafter known as porkchop for no other reason than I have the Doug song in my head) picks up Savage and has him in position for a slam, prompting Dusty to wonder what he’s going to do with him. Heenan says that he picked Savage up like a 100lb infant. Tony says there’s no winning or losing but only surviving. Yeah I’d agree.
Whose career can survive this match? Here’s Arn and Flair again as apparently their plan to eliminate Hulkamania is just to stomp them and punch them and slam them a lot. Yep, that’s the epic plan.
Tony is holding out hope despite a few seconds before saying it’s hopeless. I love that top level journalism there Tony! Keep it up and one day you might be able to get a better job like selling meat from a truck in Minneapolis! They actually argue over how many people are in there against Hogan and Savage. To get off of that we point out that this started with a telegram. Somehow that’s an improvement.
Naturally they ask if Hulkamania can survive instead of Hogan and Savage. It amazes me that he got so little respect over the years. He was nuts, but dang could he wrestle. In one of the best unintentionally funny moments I can ever remember, the powder that Hogan and Savage have spills out and within 5 seconds Brutus is there to help them. That’s just greatness.
Also they’re almost face down in it. Could this get any funnier? Now the interesting part is what Brutus does for them. He brings them weapons to even the odds, instead of actually sticking around to help fight like a friend would. Nope he brought them something to help them fight off the forces of evil.
What does he bring? Does he bring brass knuckles? Maybe a club? Perhaps a couple of chairs? Nope. He brings frying pans. Brutus Beefcake brings a pair of frying pans to help save his friends. Where in the world do I start? Let’s see: how about WHY DID HE HAVE FRYING PANS??? Was he making bacon in the back or something? Does he tend to carry cookware around with him? Did the barber shop fall through? I guess he couldn’t repair the window after Shawn broke it so he became a chef.
Somehow, that is the most logical thing I’ve said all night. There’s five minutes left so let’s get through this if we can. Luger comes back in with a glove that they imply is loaded. He sets to hit Savage but Macho ducks (that sounds like an upgrade to Duck Hunter) and Luger stops, but then starts again to hit Flair and turn face I guess. Hogan and Savage turn to leave but Savage runs back in and pins Flair while everyone else kind of stands around and lets it happen. WOW. So did they forget the whole pin thing too I suppose? Heenan is ticked off and leaves and we’re finally done.
Rating: -F. This is below an F. We’ve gone so low that we’ve went past Z (which stands for Zeus not Z-Gangsta blast it) and we’ve reached negative letters. That’s how insane this was. I mean it made no sense, the rules I laid out might as well have been the real ones because nothing stayed the same as it was in the beginning, you couldn’t see a stupid thing if you were in the audience, the match was exactly the same thing that it had always been with Hogan surviving, and the plan was just to beat them up a lot? Take note fans: never, I mean never, send a telegram in your life. You can see what it can lead to.
What a difference a year makes. Here’s another very unique match which actually worked at Uncensored 1997.
Team WCW vs. Team NWO vs. Team Piper
WCW: Giant, Lex Luger, Scott Steiner
NWO: Hall, Nash, Hogan, Savage
Piper: Piper, McMichael, Jarrett, Benoit
This is kind of like a cross between WarGames and a battle royal. You have three guys start and go five minutes. Then after two minutes we get another man from each team (Team WCW will miss an entry due to Rick going on and they weren’t smart enough to have Page fill in). It’s elimination style, which means we don’t have to deal with 11 guys in the ring at once. You can put someone out via pin, submission, knockout and over the top.
If Team WCW wins, the NWO is stripped of all titles and can’t wrestle for 3 years. If Team Piper wins, Piper gets Hogan in a cage at a time to be announced. If Team NWO wins, they more or less have carte blanche (Previously they would have gotten a title shot anywhere anytime, kind of like Money in the Bank). They change that back to the MITB thing but it would ultimately be the free reign thing.
Benoit, Hall and Giant start us off. They’re not at ringside which is kind of stupid as you would be able to jump them as they come out in theory no? Benoit jumps Hall before Giant gets there. Not that we can see that as we need to see Giant’s very slow walk to the ring instead. Giant gets in very slowly which is rather smart before taking them both down with a clothesline.
Benoit tries to chop away and it doesn’t work at all. It’s almost hard to believe that Benoit would be world champion before Hall. Basically this is Giant and two other guys in there as he keeps dominating the entire time. Elbow drop on Hall so Benoit tries to jump Giant. No real attempts to throw anyone out but since you can win by pinfall that’s ok.
Sleeper doesn’t work for Hall and Giant gets a huge chokeslam to Benoit for only two. Hall saves, I guess out of fear of fighting Giant one on one. Giant busts out the claw of all things but a corner splash misses and Giant is gone first! That leaves two guys for Team WCW. The clock runs out on the first period and it’s Jarrett, Randy Savage and Luger. That puts five guys in the ring at the moment if you’re keeping score.
It’s more or less a battle royal at this point as Luger can’t gorilla press Savage out. Jeff avoids a Razor’s Edge and here come Mongo, Nash and Scott Steiner. No real effort to put anyone out right now as everyone is really just beating on each other. Belly to belly puts Nash down as we only have Hogan and Piper left. Nash gets a big boot and clothesline to Jarrett and he’s out. Jeff that is. Mongo gets backdropped out so Team Piper has just Benoit and Piper left.
Here are Hogan and Piper so everyone is out there now. Nash gets a big boot to Steiner to knock him out so Luger is all that’s left for WCW, Piper and Benoit for Piper and all of the NWO is left. Wait where’s Hogan? What a shock he’s going to come out last isn’t he? Oh there he is with Dennis Rodman. Piper is on the floor but not out. Scratch that as he’s back now. Seven people in at the moment.
Hogan, Piper and Savage are on the floor with Hogan kind of chilling and Piper choking Savage. The Outsiders beat up Benoit and everyone is finally in there at the same time. Hogan throws Piper through the ropes and they brawl on the floor a bit. After Savage jumps them in the aisle everyone goes back to the ring. In a HORRIBLY stupid looking moment, Piper is sent into the ropes but Rodman pulls it down to put him out. This would have looked passable if Piper didn’t JUMP OVER THE ROPE BEFORE IT WAS PULLED DOWN. And people wonder why they went out of business.
They keep brawling on the floor anyway and Savage helps as it’s the Outsider Edge for Benoit. The tag champs toss him out and Team Piper is gone. Luger is the only one left for WCW and he’s against technically five guys counting Rodman. The NWO literally stands around for a minute and a half posing before Nash sets him up for a powerbomb.
Luger escapes and racks Savage, clotheslines Nash and racks Hall to eliminate all three in under thirty seconds. And never mind as when he goes to rack Hogan, Savage gets the spraypaint from Rodman and pops Luger in the face with it so Hogan can get the winning pin. The NWO won a big match. I’m shocked too.
Rating: B-. The match was actually pretty good as it didn’t really get stupid and for a big multi-man tag, this actually worked. I fail to see why Rick wasn’t out there but still, pretty good stuff. The ending was obvious but it doesn’t ever drag, the stuff they did made perfect sense the entire time and it was kind of interesting. Shockingly good main event.
We’ll settle down a bit with Nitro on February 16, 1998 in a match that could have headlined Starrcade.
Hollywood Hogan/Randy Savage vs. Sting/Lex Luger
Savage jumps Sting and Luger in the aisle to start the fight and Hogan sends Sting into the barricade. Hollywood hammers on Sting inside but Sting comes back with right hands to send Hogan out to the floor. Savage and Luger head into the ring now with Savage choking on the ropes.
They’re the official starters but when Savage goes to tag Hogan he’s out on the floor with Bischoff. Hollywood gets on the apron so Randy tags him with a forearm to the back. Three elbow drops get a near fall on Luger but Hogan’s legdrop misses. Hot tag Sting and Hogan is almost immediately in the Scorpion. Here’s the NWO as the match is thrown out.
Rating: D+. Did you really expect anything else here? There’s nothing wrong with setting up the two PPV main events in one TV match as it kills two birds with one stone without doing the same match twice. This was your usual NWO style brawl and the match itself only lasted a few minutes but it was entertaining enough to get by.
And the rematch from a month later on March 16, 1998.
Sting/Lex Luger vs. Hollywood Hogan/Randy Savage
Savage on the mic: “OOOOH YEAH!” Hogan on the mic: “OOOOH NO!” Why did no one think of that before? Sting’s music hits but we only have Luger. Buffer does the entrance but there’s no Sting. Bischoff takes the mic and says Luger is on his own because there’s no Sting. The camera pans up to show a helicopter (blowing the ring skirts and mats around) with Sting REPELING INTO THE RING!
Hogan blames Savage for this so Savage goes to leave, only to be stopped by the Disciple. Hogan jumps Randy from behind as Hogan and Sting look on from the ring. Savage is thrown inside and gets beaten up by Sting with the fans trying to recover from the entrance. A top rope splash gets two for Sting and he shouts at Savage to get up. Sting pops Hogan with a right hand and brings in Luger to work on Savage even more.
Luger suplexes Savage down for no cover and drops him again with a gorilla press. Back to the world champion for an atomic drop before Luger comes in for the running forearm. Hogan isn’t even paying attention to the ring. Savage gets up and slaps Hogan on the back but Hogan says he doesn’t think so and bails.
Randy throws Hogan back inside before getting in a fight with Disciple. Hogan chokes Luger down but Lex avoids the legdrop and tags in Sting. There are a pair of Stinger Splashes for Hollywood and a right hand for Bischoff. Savage is rolled in by the Disciple and everything breaks down, drawing in the Disciple for the DQ.
Rating: D. This wasn’t a match as much as a massive angle. Hogan and Savage already had a bad match last night and it looks like we’re gearing up for another one in the future. Luger continues to be a man with no direction at all as he’s just thrown into random matches to fight for WCW because that’s all he does. Bad match here but the entrance was awesome.
I don’t think it’s any secret that the Mega Powers were a bigger deal in their early days, especially with the stuff leading up to the explosion at Wrestlemania V. Even after that though, it still felt like a huge deal when these guys would team up. They were the biggest stars of their era and they were still a big deal in WCW when they were both past their primes. These two were joined at the hip (and unhip in WCW) and it made a lot of fans very happy over the years.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Here’s something scary: the Human Wrecking Machine Zeus.
Zeus was a character in Hulk Hogan’s movie No Holds Barred and wanted revenge on Hogan for his character beating Zeus in the movie. Imagine Alan Rickman wanting revenge on Bruce Willis for how Die Hard ended. Anyway, this led to the main event of Summerslam 1989.
Zeus/Randy Savage vs. Brutus Beefcake/Hulk Hogan
Before we get going, Liz gets her own full entrance as the secret weapon. It’s a brawl to start but Hogan can’t hurt Zeus. He goes to the eyes but can’t slam Zeus down so the monster chokes Hulk down. Beefcake tries to dive on Zeus but gets caught in midair. Now it’s a bearhug on Hogan but here’s Savage off a tag. Why in the world would you change when you had Hogan in trouble like that? A top rope ax handle gets two for Randy and it’s off to the sleeper.
Hogan elbows out of it and hits some shoulder blocks but Zeus knees him in the back to slow him down. Back to Zeus for another bearhug which takes Hogan down to the mat for some two counts. It’s back to Savage to snap Hogan’s throat over the top rope and a suplex gets two. Savage misses some elbow drops and there’s the hot tag to Beefcake. A high knee gets two on Savage and Beefcake hooks his sleeper. Savage rams him into the middle buckle and it’s off to Zeus, but Brutus puts him in a sleeper as well.
Randy breaks up the hold with Sherri’s loaded purse but he suckers Hogan into the ring instead of covering. Hogan stops Savage from attacking Liz but Beefcake is still in big trouble. Back to Zeus for some choking on Beefcake until the referee makes the save. Savage comes back in but walks into a double clothesline to put both guys down. The hot tag brings in Hogan to clean house but Sherri trips Hulk up to give Savage control again.
The big elbow hits but Hogan is up before there’s any cover. Savage runs away and it’s time for the showdown with Zeus. Hogan pounds away and finally puts Zeus down to one knee. Liz takes out Sherri and Beefcake intercepts Savage, causing him to drop the loaded purse. Hogan blasts Zeus in the face with the purse, slams him down and drops the leg for the pin.
Rating: D+. Amazingly enough, a non-wrestler like Zeus wasn’t capable of having a good match on any size of a stage. Beefcake and Savage were just window dressing here, but in this case the window dressing carried the match for his team. Zeus was just horrible here and was basically the original promotional stunt for a wrestling movie, which never works.
Ted DiBiase bought Zeus to try and take out Hogan at Survivor Series 1989.
Hulkamaniacs vs. Million Dollar Team
Hulk Hogan, Demolition, Jake Roberts
Ted DiBiase, Zeus, Powers of Pain
My goodness that’s an amazing face team. Ok, so now I get to explain Zeus. A month or two ago, WWE released No Holds Barred, a movie Hogan made in the late 80s, on DVD. The villain in the movie is named Zeus and you may notice he’s here. Zeus is played by an actor (not a wrestler mind you) named Tom Lister and the idea is that he’s living his character and is coming to beat Hogan up “in real life” because he lost in the movie. This would be like the guy who played Goldfinger trying to get revenge on Sean Connery. To make things even better, this was originally going to be the main event of Wrestlemania 6.
I’m sure you can see the problems mounting up already, with the main one being that Zeus doesn’t know how to wrestle. Other than that, there’s the idea that the movie barely broke even so a lot of people didn’t get the idea of the story. A positive twist to this is that a lot of people didn’t get the idea of the story, which probably kept the company from being laughed at more than they already were. Zeus wrestled like four matches ever, most of which were short or tag matches so he wasn’t in the ring long. WCW, the geniuses that they are, brought him back seven years later and put him in the main event of another PPV.
Anyway back to the match. The Million Dollar Team won’t let them get inside until Jake fires in the snake to chase them all away. Hogan and Demolition are the champions that you would expect them to be at this point. Zeus wants to fight Hogan one on one but their respective partners hold them both back. Jake starts with Zeus but the actor wants Hogan. They stare each other down and Hogan bounces off Zeus. Hogan pounds away but nothing hurts Zeus at all.
Instead Hulk finds the one weak spot on Zeus by raking the eyes. He slams Zeus down and amazingly enough, IT DOESN’T REALLY DO MUCH. Barbarian hits Hogan in the back of the head and Zeus twists Hogan’s neck around. He starts choking away and it’s a DQ for Zeus who is only pulled off by DiBiase and the promise of money. Just to clarify, we’re giving the Hulkamaniacs, an 80s dream team, a man advantage. Also why would DiBiase get Zeus off Hogan? Wouldn’t Hogan’s pain and agony make DiBiase happy?
It’s DiBiase vs. Hogan now and Hulk is in big trouble. DiBiase hammers away in the corner but Hulk gets a boot up in the corner and there’s the tag to Jake. A clothesline puts DiBiase on the floor and it’s off to Ax who demolishes DiBiase with ease. Smash comes in and they both pound Ted down. Back to Hogan who triple teams DiBiase along with Demolition. Back to Ax with a clothesline but DiBiase elbows him down out of desperation.
Off to Warlord as these two teams are still feuding even a year later. Come to think of it there wasn’t much else in between for those guys either. Dang did the division fall that fast in just a year? A shoulder breaker puts Ax down but Barbarian misses a middle rope elbow. Off to Warlord again but he gets clotheslined down. Fuji trips Ax up and a basic elbow drop is enough to tie the score.
It’s Smash vs. Warlord now but it’s quickly off to Hogan. Hulk softens him up to bring in Jake, which Jesse calls a mismatch. That’s likely based on power but I’m pretty sure Jake is taller than Warlord. Off to Smash but Warlord pokes him in the eye to take over. Back to Barbarian whose big boot is caught but Smash misses the elbow. DiBiase comes back in with those falling punches of his which get two.
It’s chinlock time with a knee in Smash’s back. DiBiase misses a middle rope back elbow of all things but Smash won’t tag for some reason. Barbarian makes a blind tag so the hot shot Smash hits on DiBiase doesn’t count and Barbarian takes his head off with a top rope clothesline for the pin. Jake comes in next but he can’t DDT Barbarian. Barbie whips Jake into the corner with authority although I’m not sure who’s authority it was.
Back to Warlord as things slow down a lot due to exhaustion. Jake dives for a tag but DiBiase slaps Hogan to draw him in instead. DiBiase piledrives Jake but Roberts gets a foot on the ropes to Jesse’s annoyance. Barbarian misses a headbutt and there’s the hot tag to Barbarian. He cleans house and gets two on Barbarian off a big boot. A suplex gets the same and my goodness how rare is it to see Hogan get a two count? Hogan fights off both Powers of Pain but they catch him in a spike piledriver which is good for a DQ for both of them, making it Hogan/Roberts vs. DiBiase.
Dibiase drops knees on Hogan before slapping on the Million Dollar Dream. That eventually gets two arm drops and Jake makes the save. That’s actually a nice touch as it makes the hold look stronger by needing a save instead of Hogan saving himself. Hogan finally breaks the hold and punches a jumping DiBiase. Hot tag brings in the Snake who cleans house. Jake drives in knees on DiBiase’s head as Hogan is dying in the corner.
Here’s Virgil to interfere and take the DDT. DiBiase drops a fist on Jake and puts his feet on the ropes to steal the pin. Ted pounds on Hogan who is still reeling from the long Million Dollar Dream. I’ll give him credit as that’s some great selling of a hold like that. Off to a chinlock and Hogan taps, which wouldn’t mean a thing for years. Hogan breaks the hold but they clothesline each other. DiBiase belly to back suplexes him and it’s Hulk Up time. You know the rest and there’s the legdrop.
Rating: C. There’s one major problem with this match: the first four minutes of this match give away the ending almost immediately. How can you give Hogan, Roberts and Demolitio a man advantage that fast? I’m not saying Hogan should have lost, but the Zeus stuff could have come later in the match and worked much better. Have Zeus stand on the apron most of the match and it would have worked fine. The fans finally reacted though.
Here’s the big blowoff for Zeus at No Holds Barred: The Movie and the Match, a special which aired the movie and a cage match from a TV taping on December 27, 1989.
Hulk Hogan/Brutus Beefcake vs. Zeus/Randy Savage
This is one of like three matches Zeus ever had. Both guys have to escape to win. Vince and Jesse are on commentary. Beefcake gets in first but Sherri slams the door on Hogan to keep him out of the cage. Savage chokes Hogan through the cage as Zeus destroys Beefcake. Sherri locks the cage as Hulk punches Savage through the bars. The crowd is on fire for this. Hogan comes in over the top and makes the save as it’s time for the big showdown with Zeus.
Hogan slams Zeus into the cage a few times and down goes the monster. Savage gets whipped HARD into the cage by Brutus and both heels eat Hogan boots in the corner. Zeus gets double teamed but he sends both Hogan and Beefcake into the cage to take over. Savage tries to climb out but Beefcake stops him. Sherri tries to help Savage but Beefcake rams their heads together to keep Savage in the match.
Savage and Zeus ram both guys into the cage over and over which is a very basic yet very smart strategy for a match like this. Beefcake comes back and rams Zeus and Savage into the cage and all four guys are down. The referee unlocks the door to see what he should do, but Sherri rams the cage onto Hebner’s head and slides Savage the cage.
We load up the big spot of the match as Savage climbs the cage. Vince is freaking out. Jesse: “Well who’s going to stop it McMahon? You can’t do nothing about it.” Savage goes up to the top of the cage and wraps the chain around his hand. He dives at Beefcake but Brutus hits him in the ribs on the way down.
Beefcake gets the chain and pounds on Savage as Hogan can’t slam Zeus. Savage and Beefcake climb at the same time and it’s Hulk Up time. Beefcake gets over the top as Savage goes through the door and it’s one on one. Hogan slams Zeus, rams him into the cage about four times, slams him again, drops an insane THREE LEGS and Zeus is DEAD. The pin is academic.
Rating: B. That’s likely high, but this was absolutely perfect for what it was supposed to be. This was a TV taping main event and the fans got to see Hogan DESTROY his biggest rival at the time. The match was a ton of fun with Hogan in his late 80s goodness. Hogan vs. Zeus was actually going to be the Mania 6 main event for awhile until Vince woke up and put Warrior in there instead.
Zeus actually wrestled a match in Puerto Rico on July 7, 1990.
Zeus vs. Abdullah the Butcher
In case you’ve never heard of him, Zeus was an actor that was brought in as a monster heel against Hogan, only for everyone to realize that he’s an actor, meaning he can’t wrestle. It’s a brawl on the floor to start as the fans are INSANE for this match. Zeus mauls the Butcher on the floor before the bell and poses in the ring but that just warms Abdullah up. We go inside with Butcher, apparently a crowd favorite here, staring at Zeus as trash is thrown into the ring.
Zeus chokes away in the corner before putting on an awkward looking bearhug. Butcher gets pounded down in the corner as Zeus clearly can’t do more than one or two moves. Again, not his fault as he’s not a wrestler. The Butcher comes back with a shot to the throat but Zeus pounds away with left hands and chokes Abdullah into the corner. Abdullah won’t go down though and pulls out his trusty fork, only to have Zeus take it away and put on another bearhug.
Butcher finally remembers those Hulk Hogan tapes he watched and goes to the eyes to escape and Zeus is in big trouble. The elbow (signature move) only gets one on Zeus and it’s back to the choking. No one goes anywhere off some shoulder blocks so Zeus chokes some more. Butcher comes back with a single right hand to put Zeus on the mat and it’s off to a nerve hold.
Zeus glares his way out of the hold and monkey flips Abdullah (seriously) down for some more choking. A few kicks to the ribs put Zeus in more trouble and they slug it out some more. Butcher knocks Zeus outside but he puts on a bearhug from the apron. They head outside and Zeus blasts him with a wooden podium as we get a double countout.
Rating: C. That rating only works if you look at it as ANYTHING other than a wrestling match. This was a spectacle instead of a match and that’s the best way it could have worked. Zeus wasn’t a wrestler and couldn’t do much more than bearhugs and chokes but you can’t hold that against him. Incredibly fun stuff here.
Zeus wouldn’t be seen for six years until he returned at Uncensored 1996 as Z-Gangsta. This needs a recap.
We recap the feud with Hogan and Savage against the Alliance. More or less what happened was simple: the Alliance challenged Hogan to a 4-1 cage match, but WCW wised up and realized Hogan carrying a match like that could expose him too much, so they threw Savage in there too.
Now, how did the Alliance put out this challenge? Was it by beating down Hogan? Was it by destroying something he held dear and valuable? Was it by making threats to his family and home? Nope to all three. They sent him a telegram. Let me repeat that. The feud and match were set by a group sending Hogan a telegram. That’s so freaking stupid I can’t even make fun of it. I truly can’t.
They sent him a telegram. I can’t get over that. Something else I notice: there hasn’t been a single mention of Randy Savage all show. It’s been nothing but Hogan. The team is known as the Alliance to End Hulkamania. In the build up from the announcers there’s no mention of Savage. What in the world is wrong with these people? Why am I trying to figure that out?
Doomsday Cage Match: Hulk Hogan/Randy Savage vs. Alliance to End Hulkamania
The Alliance is Ric Flair, Arn Anderson, Meng, Barbarian, Lex Luger, Taskmaster (Kevin Sullivan), Z-Gangsta (Zeus from the late 80s) and Ultimate Solution (big fat strong guy that never did anything other of note in wrestling. He did play Bane in Batman and Robin though in case anyone is interested.) Now you might be wondering how this is going to work.
Well until about 3 minutes before the bell rings, so was everyone else. Literally, they didn’t know what they were going to do until the day of the show. That’s your brilliant wrestling company at work. The idea would be this. You have a ring with three cages on top of it. In other words, there’s a ring with a cage over it that’s very tall and has a top of in. The top of that cage is the floor of a second cage. That cage has six sides, all made of cage.
There’s ANOTHER of those on top. The match starts up at the top for no apparent reason. The idea is that it’s more or less a gauntlet match. There’s two guys on top, four in the middle cage and two in the bottom cage and Hogan and Savage have to win in all three cages. Yep, that’s it.
In a match that’s supposed to be all about violence and called a Doomsday match, we have a freaking gauntlet with regular pins and submissions. Let’s get to this. Michael Buffer is in the ring doing introductions for this as I have a feeling that this is going to take a LONG time.
He asks if they’re ready. He asks it again. I wonder if they’re going to break it down after the match. The cage I mean. Oh Brian Pillman is supposed to be in this but he’s left for ECW at this time where he would be for all of a day or so and then on to WWF. Flair comes out sans belt or any acknowledgement that he’s champion so you can see where the priorities are.
Oh we also have to wait for them to all climb up the steps to get to their cages too. Barbarian has been banned from wrestling in most countries in the world too. You learn something new every day. Zeus (I refuse to refer to him as Z-Gangsta more than I have to) and Ultimate Solution aren’t here yet. His original name was Final Solution. I’ll give you two guesses as to how that went.
So we’re starting with Anderson and Flair at the top so we’re starting with the Mega Powers vs. Anderson and Flair. Tell me, what’s wrong with that as a main event? I’d like that FAR better. Luger left WWF for this. That’s just sad. They finally just give up and call Hogan a superhero. Naturally the camera follows him up the stairs as my fear of heights is kicking in.
Dusty says the fans have been waiting for days in and around this building. Just go with it. Once they finally reach the top we start immediately and also immediately we see the massive problem: the fans can’t see a stupid thing. They’re about thirty feet from the ground (which of course hits as high as 65 so far according to Brain) and the lighting is awful.
Also, this is before the days of the Titantron. If they had that, this would be ok. No actually it wouldn’t be but it would have been better. The people watching the PPV from home have a hard time seeing this so imagine what it’s like for the fans there. They’re dead quiet too after the opening maybe 10 seconds because reality has set in. Oh Arn is wearing a full black body suit for no apparent reason.
Heenan says what I think might have been hidden jabs at WCW by saying “What a great thing for television!” and “Only here in WCW!” Those are either fed to him or shots at the brilliant minds who came up with this. Actually no. They’re not worthy of sarcastic praise. They’re freaking idiots. I mean seriously, WHAT ARE THEY THINKING???
If you’re going to do a cage match, fine. If you’re going to do a big cage match, fine. If you’re going to do a gauntlet cage match, that’s fine too. Actually that’s kind of an interesting concept. However, DO IT WHERE THE PEOPLE CAN SEE IT. My goodness how hard of a concept is that? What’s the most important aspect of any show? How about being able to see it?
The fans here might be able to make out someone next to one side of the cage but other than that, nothing. And don’t even bother staying if you sit across the arena and don’t have binoculars because you’re screwed. Sting and Booker won the main event already. I can’t get over how ridiculous this is. Seriously who thought this was a good idea?
Oh and there’s a referee up there too even though it’s Uncensored and therefore unsanctioned. There’s also a massive pole in the middle in case Hogan wants to shoot a Brooke Hogan video up there. They go to a wide shot to just further show how stupid this is. We can hear the wrestlers talking which is usually covered up by the crowd.
Maybe they can see as there’s a pop for Hogan ripping the shirt off. Heenan says this is better than the World Series or the Super Bowl. Yes it does Bobby, yes it does. Hey we’ve hit 70 feet in the air! Heenan redeems himself a bit with the line of all a manager can do here is hope they have a client in the morning. We get a random reference to some woman named Becky in Denver. Ok then.
Tony sums up the match perfectly: the fans wanted to know what the Doomsday Cage was so they’re finding out here. Well thanks for that Tony. In other words, we’re going to throw out a cool sounding name and say Hogan is in it against a bunch of guys that we’re only going to vaguely mention and say to find out, pay up. Once you hook them, you don’t have to do anything.
They did the same thing with the Elimination Chamber in 2002, but the difference was that match wasn’t bad. It certainly wasn’t great but I’ve seen far worse matches. Exhibit A is being reviewed at the moment. In the ultra violent match, we get double figure fours.
Heenan’s comedy is all that’s holding the pieces of this in place. Notice I didn’t say together but just in place as they would likely want to run away and join a witness protection program or something. Zeus and Solution didn’t wrestle again after this. They were the smart ones I guess.
Dusty says if you have a chain length fence (who doesn’t?) just go lay on it to see what this is like. Bobby: Then call your neighbor over and slap the figure four on him! Then put the figure eight on your Doberman! Bobby Heenan, I love you very much. You need massive amounts of therapy and medication, but I love you.
Flair drops something from one cage to the other which is never explained or mentioned again. My guess would be the will of Flair’s career since it’s dead at this point. Hogan and Savage throw powder, which is likely the remains of the cocaine they needed to agree to this.
They go through a trapdoor to get to the next cage, and Anderson and Flair are eliminated. WOW. Ok so wait. All they had to do was get through a door? They didn’t have to pin someone or get a tap out but just go through a door? Ladies and gentlemen, I’m done. I’m going to stop trying to make sense of this match and that’s all there is to it.
This just doesn’t make sense at all but for some reason they insist that it does. Bobby says Boris Karloff would love this. Not really but ok. Hogan has a chain and beats on Sullivan with it. They’re down about 12 feet now so the crowd is a bit more into it. It’s the Faces of Fear (Meng and Barbarian) on Savage and Luger and Sullivan on Hogan.
This room has a door in the middle of it so it’s like two small cages. Actually there’s a reason for it though which will come up in a minute. After being beaten on by two grown men and a steel chain, Hogan is fine and manages to get the chain away to lock the door (which didn’t have a lock before but whatever) and trap Meng and Barbarian inside.
A shot of the cage from the floor makes this look a lot better as in essence they’re fighting on top of a regular cage. That’s not bad I guess. Anderson and Flair drop to the second cage and are trapped as well. Where’s my wah wah music when I need it? Heenan says it’s a maze with no way in or out.
Yep other than the doors they came in through, the doors they leave through or the path that the referee points them through to get to the end. Speaking of doors they go out of one and fight on the stairs which is kind of scary when you think about it as there’s no wall to save them there.
Sullivan is actually over halfway out as Heenan says that he’ll be spam if he hits. I’ll infract him if he does. I don’t want any freaking spam in my reviews. Savage and Luger are still in the cage by the way. According to Brain everyone is on their feet. They have to be to see this I suppose. They’re more or less quiet by the way.
Luger gets loose and we’re out on the floor. Yep, they got out of the cage and while the rules stated earlier in the match said that Hogan and Savage just needed to get down to win, they apparently are going to keep going. Hey, we’re having a Doomsday Cage Match, so let’s fight in the ring!
Yep, they’re fighting in the ring. Luger and Savage are fighting by the cage with Hogan and Sullivan in the ring. The four guys in the upper cage break out and head down the cage. Now this could be cool: Hogan and Savage 6-2 in the arena. Well ok I can go with that as at least its easier to see.
It’s more or less the same thing as the previous match but…that’s….why are the other four just leaving? They just walked back to the dressing room. Anderson and Flair are supposed to, but the Faces of Fear are still in this legally, but who cares about that? That would MAKE SENSE! Hogan is beating on Luger in the ring while Savage is having boards thrown at him.
Apparently the Faces of Fear have been eliminated. Oh ok I think I’ve got it now: the rules are as follows. Hogan and Savage had to go to the top of the cage where they had to either pin or get a submission from Flair and Anderson but they were allowed to have an alternate way of winning because Hogan made a large donation to the Save the Wombat Foundation.
Next up they had to get pins or submissions on some combination of the Faces of Fear, Sullivan or Luger, but they were able to lock the Faces of Fear into a cage and therefore receive a Federal credit for preventing an international assault and battery charge since both men are international ambassadors sent by the King of Tonga to study wrestling (that’s actually not made up if you can believe that. That’s legit true).
Now at the beginning the rules stated that they simply had to get to the floor to win, however there was a clause stating that if there was a high percentage (17 or greater) of time spent on discussing the social habits of Bulgarian monks in the 15th century by the four in the second cage during the battle in the first cage, then simply getting to the floor wouldn’t be classified as a win.
In that case a pin in the other ring would work. However, that won’t work either because Lex Luger’s lawyers feel that the population of fire ants in this match were misrepresented so therefore a simple pin in the ring won’t work either, and the final two members of the Alliance to End Hulkamania, which has founded new chapters in Laos, Manhattan and the North Pole, fighting off the evils of Hulk-Chi-Min, Hulk Maritoni and Hulk-a-Claus, must be equally represented in this match, which must end via pinfall in the original ring.
HOWEVER, it will be allowed for former members of the Alliance to reenter the match under the Columbus Act which also founded Ohio in 1776, but also said that wrestlers were unlawfully evicted from the match via an international treaty can be allowed to return. ANYWAY, now that we’re back to the match, let’s continue here but I need to make sure this remains logical. It’s very important to keep that going here.
They’re all at the ring now and we have more bad chair shots. I love how the graphic under the split screen says Doomsday Cage Match despite a significant lack of cage. Here’s Ultimate Solution and Zeus. According to the clause listed above, we head back to the original cage for the showdown. Yep, it’s Hogan and Savage in a no tag tag-team match against two big strong guys. How do they come up with these things?
As if this wasn’t riveting enough, we hit a bear hug. Hey now, it’s time for the rematch of the match that didn’t happen seven years ago in another company that we’re not going to mention but imply that everyone knows anyway because that’s how we roll. Ultimate Solution (hereafter known as porkchop for no other reason than I have the Doug song in my head) picks up Savage and has him in position for a slam, prompting Dusty to wonder what he’s going to do with him.
Heenan says that he picked Savage up like a 100lb infant. Tony says there’s no winning or losing but only surviving. Yeah I’d agree. Whose career can survive this match? Here’s Arn and Flair again as apparently their plan to eliminate Hulkamania is just to stomp them and punch them and slam them a lot. Yep, that’s the epic plan. Tony is holding out hope despite a few seconds before saying it’s hopeless.
I love that top level journalism there Tony! Keep it up and one day you might be able to get a better job like selling meat from a truck in Minneapolis! They actually argue over how many people are in there against Hogan and Savage. To get off of that we point out that this started with a telegram. Somehow that’s an improvement.
Naturally they ask if Hulkamania can survive instead of Hogan and Savage. It amazes me that he got so little respect over the years. He was nuts, but dang could he wrestle. In one of the best unintentionally funny moments I can ever remember, the powder that Hogan and Savage have spills out and within 5 seconds Brutus is there to help them. That’s just greatness.
Also they’re almost face down in it. Could this get any funnier? Now the interesting part is what Brutus does for them. He brings them weapons to even the odds, instead of actually sticking around to help fight like a friend would. Nope he brought them something to help them fight off the forces of evil. What does he bring? Does he bring brass knuckles?
Maybe a club? Perhaps a couple of chairs? Nope. He brings frying pans. Brutus Beefcake brings a pair of frying pans to help save his friends. Where in the world do I start? Let’s see: how about WHY DID HE HAVE FRYING PANS??? Was he making bacon in the back or something? Does he tend to carry cookware around with him? Did the barber shop fall through? I guess he couldn’t repair the window after Shawn broke it so he became a chef.
Somehow, that is the most logical thing I’ve said all night. There’s five minutes left so let’s get through this if we can. Luger comes back in with a glove that they imply is loaded. He sets to hit Savage but Macho ducks (that sounds like an upgrade to Duck Hunter) and Luger stops, but then starts again to hit Flair and turn face I guess. Hogan and Savage turn to leave but Savage runs back in and pins Flair while everyone else kind of stands around and lets it happen. WOW. So did they forget the whole pin thing too I suppose? Heenan is ticked off and leaves and we’re finally done.
Rating: -F. This is below an F. We’ve gone so low that we’ve went past Z (which stands for Zeus not Z-Gangsta blast it) and we’ve reached negative letters. That’s how insane this was. I mean it made no sense, the rules I laid out might as well have been the real ones because nothing stayed the same as it was in the beginning, you couldn’t see a stupid thing if you were in the audience, the match was exactly the same thing that it had always been with Hogan surviving, and the plan was just to beat them up a lot? Take note fans: never, I mean never, send a telegram in your life. You can see what it can lead to.
Do I really need to explain this one? He wrestled (and I use that term very loosely) five matches ever and most of them sucked because HE WASN’T A WRESTLER. The fact that WCW actually brought him back in for a match makes my head shake as they had to know what they were getting themselves into. The guy wasn’t any good, but he wasn’t supposed to be so it’s mostly forgiveable.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Survivor Series Count-Up – 1990: When Bad Experiments End In Turkey Suits
Survivor Series 1990 Date: November 22, 1990
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Attendance: 16,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Roddy Piper
This is a somewhat different show that in recent years as we have a main event of sorts. It was never tried again and that’s probably the best idea. It’s called the Grand Finale Match of Survival in which the survivors of each team meet in one final Survivor Series match. The winners get absolutely nothing, which continues to prove that these shows are pretty worthless. Let’s get to it.
Sean Mooney welcomes us to the show and talks about the Grand Finale. He’s standing in front of a giant egg which apparently is going to hatch because of the heat from the crowd. Nothing good can possibly come from this.
The nifty squares open things up again.
After Gorilla and Piper chat a bit, we’re ready to go.
The Warriors vs. The Perfect Team
Ultimate Warrior, Texas Tornado, Legion of Doom
Mr. Perfect, Demolition
I guess this team isn’t as Ultimate as last year. This is the three man version of Demolition. Perfect is feuding with Tornado (Kerry Von Erich, the IC Champion) and the LOD is feuding with Demolition after the LOD cost them the titles. Warrior, the world champion, is there because he has nothing else to do. His team is in the back before the match and says they’ll win. Actually the name Warriors is appropriate as you have the Ultimate Warrior, the Modern Day Warrior (Von Erich’s nickname in WCCW) and the Road Warriors (the LOD’s NWA name).
I’ll never get why the LOD and Demolition never had a big proper match. They fought on house shows but that’s about it. Perfect immediately goes to the apron and lets part of Demolition start. It’s Animal vs. Smash first and they fight immediately with Animal taking him to the mat. Animal throws him into Hawk for a right hand and the other Warriors get in a shot as well.
Smash comes back with a powerslam for two and it’s off to Perfect. That doesn’t last long so here’s Smash again, and he walks right into a powerslam. Everything breaks down and the Warriors clear the ring. Tornado comes in to face Smash who is taking a beating in this so far. Off to Ax who has much better luck for about ten seconds. There’s the Claw from Tornado but for some reason Warrior gets the tag and hits a series of awkward looking shoulder blocks before finishing Ax with the splash.
Crush immediately comes in to jump Warrior and take over. Smash comes in to slam Warrior and Crush drops a top rope knee for two. Perfect is freaking out in his trademark over the top style. Warrior gets up a boot in the corner and clotheslines Crush down. Off to Hawk who always looks like he could murder someone in the ring. Perfect tries him out and is immediately slammed down.
Hawk counters a reversal to send Perfect into the corner but Bird Man’s shoulder goes into the post HARD to give the evil ones the advantage. Demolition pounds away on him but Hawk punches right back. A big flying shoulder puts Smash down and Hawk doesn’t tag when he has the chance. The top rope clothesline kills Smash and everything breaks down. Hawk kicks the referee and somehow this disqualifies Hawk, Animal, Smash and Crush. We’re down to Perfect vs. Warrior/Tornado.
It’s going to be Warrior starting the handicap match but Perfect wants Tornado instead. Perfect immediately jumps him and is clotheslined out almost immediately after the jumping. Warrior bangs Perfect’s head into Heenan’s and sends Bobby into the front row. Tornado charges at Perfect and slams into the post to give Perfect the advantage for a bit. A buckle gets exposed somewhere in there and after Tornado’s face goes into it, the Perfectplex makes it one on one.
Perfect tries the Plex again on Warrior which doesn’t work at all. Instead he hammers Warrior down and hits a great looking dropkick for two. Having Perfect run things out there for as long as possible is the best idea they’ve got. Warrior starts grabbing the ropes and shrugging off all the offense from Perfect. A shoulder block and the splash get the final pin.
Rating: D. This was probably the worst Survivor Series match so far in the four years they’ve been running this show. Not only was the match lopsided from the start, but half of the people in it were gone seven minutes in. Perfect never had a chance and Warrior had no reason to be in this match at all.
Ted DiBiase has a mystery partner for his match. Oh boy did he ever.
Million Dollar Team vs. Dream Team
Ted DiBiase, Rhythm and Blues, ???
Dusty Rhodes, Koko B. Ware, Hart Foundation
Rhythm and Blues are Honky Tonk Man and Greg Valentine and the Harts are the tag champions. Dusty and DiBiase are feuding for obvious character reasons. Now we get to the legendary part of the match: the mystery partner. DiBiase gets on the mic and introduces for the first time ever…..THE UNDERTAKER. Who on the planet would have imagined what this guy would become over the next twenty two years? Unreal indeed. The look on Taker’s face is eerie and he stands there like a zombie which makes it even better.
Quick sidebar: the Undertaker is probably the greatest example ever of someone being the only person that could pull off his character. Mark Calaway is PERFECT as the Undertaker with the look and the size and the dead looking eyes and the tattoos and everything like that. Before this he was just Mean Mark Callous in WCW and was a generic big villain. Sometimes it’s about finding what works and Taker has worked for a very long time. Also a bit of trivia: he debuted at a Superstars taping three days before this under the name Kane the Undertaker.
Undertaker and Bret start with Taker pounding the tar out of him. Well if you want to make someone look like a killer, call Bret Hart. Bret hits the ropes and charges at Taker, only to get caught by the throat and slammed down. It was more like a clothesline that Taker went to the mat with than the usual chokeslam here but he did have Bret by the throat.
Off to Neidhart who can’t move Taker at all and gets slammed for trying. Jim looked TERRIFIED and tags out to Koko, who is too stupid to be afraid. Koko misses a charge and clotheslines himself on the top. The Tombstone (I believed named by Gorilla on the spot here) debuts but isn’t exactly the famous version yet, as Taker has both of Koko’s legs on one side of his head and covers with the folded arms but from the sides. It looked and sounded great though.
Bret comes in and hammers on Undertaker who just stares at him. Taker tags in Valentine and gives one of the most evil glares you’ll ever see at Bret. Off to Big Dust who starts gyrating. They chop it out in the corner and it’s off to Anvil. The Harts take their turns working over Valentine’s arm but Greg gets a knee up in the corner. Off to Honky who is rapidly on his way out of the company. Bret makes a blind tag to Neidhart who sneaks in and powerslams Honky out.
DiBiase comes in to jump Neidhart but it’s quickly off to Dusty for the big showdown. It’s back to Neidhart quickly but Virgil trips Jim up and DiBiase clotheslines him down for the pin. Here’s Bret again who pounds away and it’s back to Dream for more of the same. Back to Undertaker who gets some HEIGHT on a jumping stomp to the back of Dusty’s head.
Bret comes in again and chokes Bret in the corner and somehow shows no emotion while at the same time looking angrier than any wrestler I’ve ever seen. Bret fights off DiBiase out of the corner and it’s off to Dusty. Taker comes in, goes up, walks (a little way) down the rope with no one to hold onto, and hits a double ax to eliminate Dusty. Brother Love stomps on Dusty a bit so Dusty chases him off. Undertaker stalks Dusty to the back to get counted out, which is the only thing they could have done with him here.
Back in the ring Bret rolls up Valentine very quickly and it’s DiBiase vs. Hart. Bret pounds on DiBiase and atomic drops him to the floor, followed by a pescado to take Ted out again. DiBiase’s shoulder goes into the post and his head goes into the steps and they head back inside. They slug it out but DiBiase sends him chest first into the buckle to take over.
A quick backslide gets two for Hart and now it’s time for a classic: Bret trips over DiBiase and fakes a knee injury, resulting in a small package for two. Virgil interference messes up and another rollup gets two for Bret. The backbreaker and middle rope elbow get two for Hart but DiBiase rolls through a cross body for the pin.
Rating: C+. This is a very interesting match as you could see stars being made and stars going away. DiBiase clearly didn’t mean as much as he used to and would shift into a tag team run soon after this. Dusty would be gone in January as would Honky. On the other hand you can see the rise of Bret Hart on the horizon as the crowd was LOSING IT over those near falls at the end. Oh and the Undertaker. That’s kind of a big deal.
The Vipers are ready for Martel’s team. Why they’re in the shower I’m not sure.
The Vipers vs. The Visionaries
Jake Roberts, Rockers, Jimmy Snuka
Rick Martel, Warlord, Power and Glory
Power and Glroy are Hercules and Paul Roma. This is built around Martel vs. Roberts, which is based on Martel blinding Jake with cologne and Jake not having full vision yet. This was a BIG feud which they screwed up with a horrible match at Wrestlemania. It wasn’t that the wrestling was bad, but that it was a blindfold match and they spent about 2 minutes in contact with each other.
Marty and Warlord start as Piper is singing I Am The Walrus. Warlord powers Marty around but misses a charge in the corner. For those of you unfamiliar with Warlord, imagine Chris Masters but paler, bald, and even dumber. Both Rockers try to outmaneuver him but it just results in bringing in Martel. Shawn handles him with ease and brings in Jake, causing Martel to scamper away.
It’s Roma instead and Jake picks him apart like he’s not even there. He works on Roma’s arm and brings in Snuka to keep it up, but the afro apparently weighs down Snuka’s brain to the point where he can’t maintain a wristlock. Off to Hercules who gets chopped down so it’s off to Warlord instead. Snuka tries his stuff but when that gets nowhere it’s off to Marty. Jannetty tries his speed stuff but jumps into a great looking powerslam for the pin.
Off to Shawn whose leapfrog is caught but he ranas Warlord down instead. Jake comes in and the fans wants a DDT. A bunch of clotheslines take Warlord down and it’s back to Shawn. Roma comes in with an elbow drop to the back of the head as Gorilla talks anatomy. Warlord comes in and backdrops Shawn before tagging out to Herc. Martel comes in just as fast and drops a knee for two. Roma sends Shawn into the corner and Shawn of course sells it like he’s dead. Martel’s shoulder hits the post and here’s Snuka again.
A flying headbutt to the standing Martel gets two, but Rick grabs a small package for the pin out of nowhere. Jake comes in again and Martel immediately runs and brings in Hercules. Roberts is getting frustrated because he can’t get his hands on Martel, but he still manages a knee lift and a failed DDT attempt. Jake starts pounding away on Herc and Martel clotheslines him down out of nowhere.
Roma comes in for some stomping but he misses a middle rope punch. There’s the hot tag to Shawn who suplexes Roma down and hits a middle rope elbow for two. Shawn does what he can but Hercules comes in off a blind tag and pounds away even more. Power and Glory hook up the Powerplex (superplex from Herc immediately followed by a top rope splash from Roma) eliminates Shawn and it’s 4-1. It’s Hercules in first but Jake is in trouble. Warlord comes in with a bearhug but Jake escapes and DDTs him out of nowhere. Jake says screw it and gets the snake out. He chases Martel to the back for the countout loss.
Rating: D+. There wasn’t much to see here but other than Jake vs. Martel, there was nothing here at all. To the best of my knowledge, Warlord and Snuka never interacted at all before or after this so they were just tacked on. The Rockers and Power and Glory had fought at Summerslam but that’s about it. The Visionaries are the first ever team to survive intact.
The Hulkamaniacs are ready for the Natural Disasters. This is a continuation of Hogan vs. Earthquake, with Hulk N Pals facing Earthquake and Jimmy Hart’s and Bobby Heenan’s cronies. Hogan says they can go get rid of Sadaam Hussein. This is during the Gulf War.
Natural Disasters vs. Hulkamaniacs
Earthquake, Dino Bravo, Haku, Barbarian
Hulk Hogan, Big Bossman, Tugboat, Jim Duggan
There’s some actual drama here as Hogan had never beaten Earthquake before this and the other guys balance out somewhat well. Haku vs. Duggan start us off as the announcers talk about the Grand Finale. It’s such a different time when they automatically know who is going to be on what side. Today you would be waiting on the swerve. Duggan pounds away on Haku and a clothesline gets two.
Bravo and Barbarian come in to get some shots but it’s quickly off to Boss Man vs. Haku. Haku dropkicks him down for two but the Boss Man Slam puts Haku out quick. Barbarian comes in next and Boss Man runs him over. Heenan gets taken off the apron and Boss Man punches Barbarian a bit before walking into a suplex. Barbie misses a middle rope elbow and it’s off to Duggan vs. Bravo. Scratch that as Earthquake makes a blind tag and crushes Duggan in the corner. Duggan keeps trying to knock Quake down but Jimmy low bridges him. Duggan brings the board in with him and hits Quake for the DQ.
It’s Hogan vs. Earthquake but Hulk beats up all three guys because he can. Hogan easily slams Earthquake and fires off ten punches in the corner. Quake comes back with a powerslam and tags in Bravo who stomps away before getting small packaged for the pin. There’s the tag to Boss Man who hits his rapid fire punches in the corner. Boss Man goes up for a cross body and oh my goodness Earthquake caught him. That is SCARY. Hogan shoves Boss Man on top of him for two but Barbarian kicks Boss Man in the back to put him down. An elbow from Earthquake eliminates Boss Man.
Hogan vs. Quake again and Hulk tries to drop the big guy. Hulk tries another slam but can’t get Quake up. The third attempt results in Quake falling on Hogan for two. Hulk avoids an elbow and there’s the tag to Tugboat, causing everyone to shout TOOOOT which sounds like booing. Hogan pulls Earthquake to the floor and Quake and Tugboat get counted out. That leaves Hogan vs. Barbarian and the only thing I can think to say is “really?” Barbarian goes after Hogan on the floor and doesn’t hit a piledriver well at all. It gets two and they clothesline each other. Barbarian hits the top rope clothesline, Hulk Up, legdrop, done.
Rating: C-. This was a lot more fast paced and energetic than you would expect. The continued practice of just teasing the encounter that the match is based on is getting REALLY old though as I guess they want to preserve the house show draws, because who would want to see a feud continue after a single match right? My goodness have things changed in the last twenty years.
Hogan beats up Heenan post match and poses. Piper cheering for Hogan is just wrong.
Some fans talk and get on my nerves. Well one fan signs who he likes which is cool.
Here’s Savage with something to say. He’s still the King at this point which has been going on for awhile. Savage doesn’t have a match tonight and he doesn’t like not being recognized as the future WWF Champion. He promises to take his title back from Warrior and talks about Sherri slapping The Ultimate Chicken a few times. There’s nothing of note here but it reinforced that they have issues. That’s something you never hear today: promos to just remind you that people don’t like each other.
Alliance vs. Mercenaries
Nikolai Volkoff, Bushwhackers, Tito Santana
Sgt. Slaughter, Boris Zhukov, Orient Express
This is during the Iraqi Sympathizer period for Slaughter and the idea here is military themed. Before the match, Slaughter tells Gene about having a Thanksgiving dinner with the Mercenaries and not having to be inconvenienced by being in the desert. That’s better than being in the Army and eating K-Rations right? This was a pretty edgy angle at the time. Stupid but edgy. This interview is in the arena with the Mercenaries’ music playing. That must be a pretty dull period for the crowd.
The Bushwhackers torment Boris to start and the flying forearm from Tito eliminates him in about 20 seconds. Sato comes in and is accidentally superkicked by Tanaka. The Battering Ram puts out Sato and it’s 4-2 inside of two minutes. Tanaka comes in and the forearm from Tito makes it 4-1 in less than 2:15. Volkoff pounds on Slaughter with his usual stuff but gets punched in the face for his efforts as Slaughter takes over.
After a long beating, Slaughter eliminates Volkoff with an elbow. There were about three minutes of beating in between there but there was absolutely nothing of note to talk about. The Bushwhackers double team Sarge for a bit but Slaughter beats them down and gutbusts Luke for an elimination. A clothesline takes out Butch about 30 seconds later and it’s one on one.
Tito immediately dropkicks Slaughter into the post and things speed up with by far the two most talented guys in the match in there. Tito hits a top rope forearm for two and stomps away even faster. Piper is trying not to curse and Slaughter slams Santana’s head into the mat. A neckbreaker and backbreaker combine for two on Santana.
After some more beating, Tito gets a quick forearm attempt but hits the referee by mistake. The forearm hits the second time but General Adnan (Slaughter’s manager/boss) hits Santana with the flag and Slaughter puts on the Camel Clutch. The referee saw the flag though and it’s a DQ win for Tito.
Rating: D-. Well that…..happened I guess. They went through seven eliminations inside of eleven minutes and the match was awful. Basically this could have been Slaughter vs. either Volkoff or Santana and gotten the same payoff. I have no idea what they were going for here, but my guess is that they had nothing else to fill in fifteen minutes with (the show only runs two hours and twenty minutes and we’ve got the ultimate dumb filler to go).
DiBiase and the Visionaries say Warrior and Hogan (no mention of Santana) can’t work together. Sean says it’s going to be these five against Warrior and Santana.
It’s time for the Egg Hatching. Gene talks about the fans being hot tonight and the egg starts to hatch. There’s no way around this: it’s the Gobbledygooker, a humanoid turkey who square dances to Turkey in the Straw with Gene Okerlund, does a bunch of flips and is played by the WAY too talented for this Hector Guerrero.
The fans IMMEDIATELY start booing when it hatches, as there is absolutely no point to it. This was rumored to be anything from Undertaker to Flair (about a year early for him) to some Playboy chick. When you’re in a bad mood about being unemployed, remember that someone came up with this idea and was paid to do so. Total time spent on this: over seven minutes.
Hogan, Warrior and Santana are ready.
Hulk Hogan/Tito Santana/Ultimate Warrior vs. Ted DiBiase/Visionaries
If you can’t see the ending of this coming, just go click on something else now. Oddly enough, Hogan comes out before Tito. Tito and Warlord start and a forearm ends Warlord in less than 30 seconds. To update a reference for 2012, Tito is apparently the Ronda Rousey of the WWF. Roma immediately powerslams Tito and brings in DiBiase. My goodness a 20 minute Santana vs. DiBiase match would freaking rock. Tito misses another forearm and a hot shot gets the pin for DiBiase.
Hogan comes in and beats the tar out of DiBiase for a bit before ducking his head too early. A kick to Hogan’s face slows him down and it’s off to Hercules and almost immediately Roma for a top rope forearm for two. Back to Hercules who pounds away on Hulk even more, as does DiBiase. The Powerplex hits Hogan and has basically no effect. Roma is immediately pinned by a clothesline and it’s 3-2.
Martel comes in to beat on Hogan but gets kicked in the face. Off to Warrior who fires off a bunch of kicks in the corner and backdrops Martel. Rick tries to hit him in the head and boy are you really that dumb? Hogan knocks Martel to the floor and Rick walks off for the countout. Hogan beats on DiBiase a bit and there’s the legdrop. Warrior beats Hercules with the splash about 40 seconds later to win.
Rating: D. What in the world was the point of this? I mean……am I watching a house show? These are the kind of matches you hear about at the end of shows to send the fans home happy, not to main event a PPV. It was clear that this show wasn’t needed and that something had to be done.
Posing ends the show.
Overall Rating: F. This show has some moments of ok, but can you imagine PAYING for this show? Undertaker debuts here but no one had any idea what that would mean. Nothing is changed at all, mainly because the company was afraid no one would want to see the house show matches after this. This show runs two hours and eighteen minutes and eight minutes of that are the Gobbledygooker. On top of that the main event runs about ten minutes in total counting entrances. You’re looking at about two hours for the non main event stuff and that’s ridiculous for a PPV. This is another show that doesn’t need to exist.
Survivor Series Count-Up – 1989: Bow Down To The Team
Survivor Series 1989 Date: November 23, 1989
Location: Rosemont Horizon, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 15,294
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura
We’re at a major changing point with this show, as we now have four man teams and five full matches, instead of the previous years with four matches. The matches are shorter now, but there are some kind of head scratching booking choices here. We do however get the greatest Survivor Series team ever on this show though, so we have that to look forward to. Let’s get to it.
Also stay tuned after the end for a special BONUS MATCH REVIEW!
We open with a video shot from a car going up to the arena, going through the doors, at the souvenir stands (12.99 for a shirt. Today that might get you a sleeve) and now it’s time for opening show promos.
Hogan is thankful for time with his family and to be the strongest force in the universe. And for his team.
DiBiase is glad he’s rich.
Jake likes his snake and the DDT.
Demolition is glad they don’t have to fight each other.
Savage is glad he’s the Macho King.
Duggan is proud to be an American.
Bravo is glad Earthquake is on his side.
Dusty is thankful for his polka dots.
Beefcake for cutting hair.
Martel for his looks.
Rude for his body.
Piper because he’s not Ricky Rude. Burn.
Genius for being the smartest man in the world.
Perfect for being his name.
The Bushwackers for sardine stuffing.
Heenan for being surrounded by the Heenan Family.
Warrior should be thankful that Ritalin is soon to be available.
We run down the cards with those nifty squares.
Dream Team vs. Enforcers
Dusty Rhodes, Brutus Beefcake, Tito Santana, Red Rooster
Big Bossman, Bad News Brown, Rick Martel, Honky Tonk Man
This is mainly over Dusty vs. Bossman which is Dusty’s first big feud in the company. Dusty stole the nightstick and the hat which has ticked Bossman off. The rest of the guys are there because it’s Survivor Series and we need six more guys. Brutus’ music was awesome, just like the names for the teams. Tito and Honky start things off and for the third straight year Honky and Brutus are in the opening match on this show. I’m not sure what that means.
Tito takes over quickly but Honky gets in one kick before RUNNING over to make a tag to Martel. Rick dropkicks Tito down as Jesse talks about the now broken up Strike Force. Tito atomic drops Martel for two and everyone but Bad News gets in the ring at once. Nothing happens but it’s cool to see. Brown not getting in is perfect for his character too. Off to the Boss Man who is immediately armdragged down by Tito.
Off to Dusty who pounds away as the fans go nuts. Chicago was a big NWA town so it’s easy to see why he’s popular. Brutus comes in to another pop but Boss Man takes him down with a few shots to the back. Honky comes in but misses a fist drop. Beefcake hammers away but Martel makes a blind tag and takes over on Brutus. Rooster comes in and the place goes quiet. When you can’t get a reaction in Chicago, things aren’t that good for you.
Martel hits some knees to the face and it’s off to Honky who dances a lot. Boss Man comes in and they slug it out with the big man taking over with ease. Martel comes back in and drops some knees but gets rolled up for two. Back to Honky as Rooster is in trouble. I’m digging these four man versions already as the match seems less crowded and the guys can stay in the ring a little longer. Rooster and Honky collide and it’s a double tag to give us another battle of Strike Force.
Tito goes loco on Martel and beats him down, but Martel breaks the figure four. Santana tries an O’Connor Roll but Martel rolls through and grabs the trunks for the first elimination. Dusty comes in next and hits a dropkick (and a decent one) followed by the big elbow…for two? We must be in the WWF. Brutus comes in to work on the arm and stomp on Martel’s face when he tries a reverse monkey flip.
Rooster comes in and can’t seem to figure out what to do with a headlock. Martel is like screw you you nitwit and backbreaks him down. Off to Boss Man who slaps on a bearhug. Gorilla keeps calling Brutus the team captain but the team is called the Dream Team and Dusty came out last. Rooster bites out of the hold and Boss Man tags Bad News who isn’t interested in coming in.
After Bad News gets pulled in he takes over because he’s fighting a freaking rooster. Just like last year though, Bad News accidentally gets hit by his partner and he walks out. It’s three on three now and we have Boss Man vs. Brutus. After the Barber gets beaten on some more it’s off to Honky for a belly to back suplex. Out of nowhere Brutus hits a high knee to Honky for the fast pin, making it 3-2 (Brutus, Dusty and Rooster vs. Boss Man and Martel).
Martel immediately comes in and puts a chinlock on Brutus which doesn’t last long. The second version of it does though as the match slows down a lot. A backbreaker puts Brutus down and he goes into the buckle a few times. Brutus grabs a sunset flip again out of nowhere to eliminate Martel and it’s 3-1. Brutus tags in Rooster to throw a bone to Boss Man and after some punches from Rooster, the Boss Man Slam gets the fast pin and it’s 2-1.
Dusty is in next but it’s quickly off to Brutus for some knees to the chest. Back to Dusty as the good guys are using some intelligence (yes, Dusty and Brutus are using intelligence) with the fast tags. Boss Man gets whipped into the ropes and Dusty takes him down with a cross body, likely rupturing at least three vital organs of Boss Man and getting the final pin. I may have been right about those organs.
Rating: C+. Nothing special here but it was fine for an opener. The fans liked most of the good guys and other than Rooster, that was a solid set of guys. The match wasn’t competitive or anything for the most part after the first five minutes but there was nothing particularly bad about it I guess.
Boss Man destroys Dusty with the nightstick and cuffs him to the ropes to keep up the beating. Brutus makes the save with the clippers.
Boss Man brags about what he just did.
The King’s Court, Savage’s team, is read.
The 4x4s say the same thing but much louder.
4x4s vs. King’s Court
Jim Duggan, Ronnie Garvin, Bret Hart, Hercules
Randy Savage, Earthquake, Dino Bravo, Greg Valentine
The 4x4s all jog to the ring with boards in their hands. This would be the second or third time that Bret was teased as a singles guy but it wouldn’t click for another year and a half. The only major feud here is Savage vs. Duggan over the crown but that’s about it. The board carriers clear the ring and stand in the ring for awhile. It looks like we start with Garvin vs. Savage but Duggan chases Savage to the floor before it’s Hercules who actually starts for the 4x4s.
Herc pounds away and slams Savage down, but right into the King’s corner and it’s off to Valentine. Greg gets atomic dropped and it’s off to Bret. Bret works on the arm for a bit and it’s off to Duggan for some right hands. Garvin comes in and I forgot about this feud. That’s likely due to me trying to block anything Garvin related from my mind. Garvin gets taken into the heel corner and it’s off to Bravo for some power.
Hercules comes back in to make it power vs. power with the dark haired guy (Hercules for you young’uns) taking over. And never mind as Earthquake comes in, kills Hercules with a shot to the head and hits the Earthquake for the elimination. Duggan comes in and collides with Quake (he’s still Canadian Earthquake here but that didn’t last long at all) but can’t do anything to him. Bret, being the smart guy that he is, sneaks up on Earthquake and school boys him so Duggan can take him down.
Off to Garvin who pounds away but Earthquake is like boy I’m gonna make you my pizza toppings. Bravo comes in to pound away on Garvin as does Valentine. The Figure Four is countered and Garvin rolls Hammer (Valentine) up for two. Savage drops a knee and it’s back to Bravo to work Garvin over a bit more. A backslide gets two for Ronnie and it’s back to Savage very quickly.
It’s back to Valentine even faster and they chop it out but Garvin makes a blind tag to Duggan who hits the three point clothesline to eliminate Valentine and tie things up. Bravo comes in again and is quickly followed by Savage and then Earthquake. Quake misses a big elbow and there’s the tag to Garvin. He beats on whomever he can and headbutts Bravo down. Here’s the still stupid Garvin Stomp (Orton does it now) and he tries the Sharpshooter (Garvin used it before Bret) but Dino breaks it up.
NOW we get somewhere with a double tag to Savage vs. Hart. These two had an awesome match on SNME a year or so before this and Bret takes over with an atomic drop. Bret loads up something on the legs but Savage dives away and tags in Bravo again. The middle rope elbow gets two for Bret and it’s back to Garvin who immediately walks into a side suplex to make it 3-2.
It’s Duggan vs. Earthquake again with Jim pounding away in the corner. Bret gets the tag and a double clothesline puts the big man down. Savage comes in and Bret is all like BRING IT ON. Well maybe not that loud but you get the idea. Savage gets tied up in the ropes and Duggan chokes away like the hero he is. Randy gets Bret down and misses a knee drop, allowing Hart to hit a backbreaker for two.
A small package gets two for Bret and Savage charges into a boot. Bret misses a middle rope elbow and it’s off to Bravo again. Dino puts on a bearhug because this match hasn’t dragged enough already. Off to Earthquake for some high powered choking followed by an elbow drop for two. The crowd popped a bit for the kickout which is more than can be said for most of this match.
Bret finally breaks free and tags Hacksaw in again so he can slam Savage. And never mind as Bret tags back in about 15 seconds later. Bravo works over the mostly beaten Bret and Hart misses a charge, going shoulder first into the post. A shoulder breaker sets up the Savage Elbow to make it 3-1.
It’s off to Quake to beat on Duggan in the corner but he misses a charge and everyone comes in. Duggan throws everyone into the corner into Earthquake and the Court all bails to the floor. Savage and Bravo get clotheslined down but Quake jumps Duggan to take him down. A big elbow gets two on Duggan and it’s back to Bravo. Duggan avoids a charging Savage but Sherri lowbridges him and it eventually draws a countout.
Rating: D+. For the life of me I don’t get why Duggan didn’t get pinned here. The ending is rather lame and it doesn’t help a match that ran WAY too long anyway. You could easily cut ten minutes out of this and no one would have missed anything at all. The match was dull outside of the moments when Bret was in there, which is something we’ll touch on more later.
Duggan chases them off with the board.
The Million Dollar Team is ready for a Thanksgiving feast in the form of the Hulkamaniacs.
Dusty Rhodes is hurt badly.
The Genius reads a poem about Thanksgiving.
Hulkamaniacs vs. Million Dollar Team
Hulk Hogan, Demolition, Jake Roberts
Ted DiBiase, Zeus, Powers of Pain
My goodness that’s an amazing face team. Ok, so now I get to explain Zeus. A month or two ago, WWE released No Holds Barred, a movie Hogan made in the late 80s, on DVD. The villain in the movie is named Zeus and you may notice he’s here. Zeus is played by an actor (not a wrestler mind you) named Tom Lister and the idea is that he’s living his character and is coming to beat Hogan up “in real life” because he lost in the movie. This would be like the guy who played Goldfinger trying to get revenge on Sean Connery. To make things even better, this was originally going to be the main event of Wrestlemania 6.
I’m sure you can see the problems mounting up already, with the main one being that Zeus doesn’t know how to wrestle. Other than that, there’s the idea that the movie barely broke even so a lot of people didn’t get the idea of the story. A positive twist to this is that a lot of people didn’t get the idea of the story, which probably kept the company from being laughed at more than they already were. Zeus wrestled like four matches ever, most of which were short or tag matches so he wasn’t in the ring long. WCW, the geniuses that they are, brought him back seven years later and put him in the main event of another PPV.
Anyway back to the match. The Million Dollar Team won’t let them get inside until Jake fires in the snake to chase them all away. Hogan and Demolition are the champions that you would expect them to be at this point. Zeus wants to fight Hogan one on one but their respective partners hold them both back. Jake starts with Zeus but the actor wants Hogan. They stare each other down and Hogan bounces off Zeus. Hogan pounds away but nothing hurts Zeus at all.
Instead Hulk finds the one weak spot on Zeus by raking the eyes. He slams Zeus down and amazingly enough, IT DOESN’T REALLY DO MUCH. Barbarian hits Hogan in the back of the head and Zeus twists Hogan’s neck around. He starts choking away and it’s a DQ for Zeus who is only pulled off by DiBiase and the promise of money. Just to clarify, we’re giving the Hulkamaniacs, an 80s dream team, a man advantage. Also why would DiBiase get Zeus off Hogan? Wouldn’t Hogan’s pain and agony make DiBiase happy?
It’s DiBiase vs. Hogan now and Hulk is in big trouble. DiBiase hammers away in the corner but Hulk gets a boot up in the corner and there’s the tag to Jake. A clothesline puts DiBiase on the floor and it’s off to Ax who demolishes DiBiase with ease. Smash comes in and they both pound Ted down. Back to Hogan who triple teams DiBiase along with Demolition. Back to Ax with a clothesline but DiBiase elbows him down out of desperation.
Off to Warlord as these two teams are still feuding even a year later. Come to think of it there wasn’t much else in between for those guys either. Dang did the division fall that fast in just a year? A shoulder breaker puts Ax down but Barbarian misses a middle rope elbow. Off to Warlord again but he gets clotheslined down. Fuji trips Ax up and a basic elbow drop is enough to tie the score.
It’s Smash vs. Warlord now but it’s quickly off to Hogan. Hulk softens him up to bring in Jake, which Jesse calls a mismatch. That’s likely based on power but I’m pretty sure Jake is taller than Warlord. Off to Smash but Warlord pokes him in the eye to take over. Back to Barbarian whose big boot is caught but Smash misses the elbow. DiBiase comes back in with those falling punches of his which get two.
It’s chinlock time with a knee in Smash’s back. DiBiase misses a middle rope back elbow of all things but Smash won’t tag for some reason. Barbarian makes a blind tag so the hot shot Smash hits on DiBiase doesn’t count and Barbarian takes his head off with a top rope clothesline for the pin. Jake comes in next but he can’t DDT Barbarian. Barbie whips Jake into the corner with authority although I’m not sure who’s authority it was.
Back to Warlord as things slow down a lot due to exhaustion. Jake dives for a tag but DiBiase slaps Hogan to draw him in instead. DiBiase piledrives Jake but Roberts gets a foot on the ropes to Jesse’s annoyance. Barbarian misses a headbutt and there’s the hot tag to Barbarian. He cleans house and gets two on Barbarian off a big boot. A suplex gets the same and my goodness how rare is it to see Hogan get a two count? Hogan fights off both Powers of Pain but they catch him in a spike piledriver which is good for a DQ for both of them, making it Hogan/Roberts vs. DiBiase.
Dibiase drops knees on Hogan before slapping on the Million Dollar Dream. That eventually gets two arm drops and Jake makes the save. That’s actually a nice touch as it makes the hold look stronger by needing a save instead of Hogan saving himself. Hogan finally breaks the hold and punches a jumping DiBiase. Hot tag brings in the Snake who cleans house. Jake drives in knees on DiBiase’s head as Hogan is dying in the corner.
Here’s Virgil to interfere and take the DDT. DiBiase drops a fist on Jake and puts his feet on the ropes to steal the pin. Ted pounds on Hogan who is still reeling from the long Million Dollar Dream. I’ll give him credit as that’s some great selling of a hold like that. Off to a chinlock and Hogan taps, which wouldn’t mean a thing for years. Hogan breaks the hold but they clothesline each other. DiBiase belly to back suplexes him and it’s Hulk Up time. You know the rest and there’s the legdrop.
Rating: C. There’s one major problem with this match: the first four minutes of this match give away the ending almost immediately. How can you give Hogan, Roberts and Demolitio a man advantage that fast? I’m not saying Hogan should have lost, but the Zeus stuff could have come later in the match and worked much better. Have Zeus stand on the apron most of the match and it would have worked fine. The fans finally reacted though.
Savage and Zeus are ready for their tag team cage match on PPV two days after Christmas. More on that later.
Hogan and Brutus do the same. They’re facing Savage and Zeus in case that wasn’t clear. Sherri shows up and throws powder in their faces so that Savage and Zeus can jump them.
Jesse and Gorilla talk about the tag match and Jesse mentions that there’s trouble in the Heenan Family, which is code for Arn Anderson about to go back to the NWA and Tully got busted for cocaine.
The Rude Brood is ready for Roddy’s Rowdies. These promos are pretty much the same all around.
This one however isn’t. Roddy is talking to Gene when the Bushwhackers and Snuka come up and are all holding turkey legs. Roddy says after the match they can have lunch. Then they all scream about breaking big bones.
Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies
Rick Rude, Fabulous Rougeau Brothers, Mr. Perfect
Roddy Piper, Bushwhackers, Jimmy Snuka
If nothing else we get to hear All American Boys, perhaps the best theme song in wrestling history. There’s no Heenan with Rude, which is part of the issues the Family is having. Luke and Perfect get things going but after a single slam it’s off to Butch who bites on Perfect’s thigh. Luke comes in and does the same and Snuka matches suit. Butch bites as well and it’s off to Snuka.
Jacques comes in as well and they stall a lot. Jacques poses a lot so Snuka headbutts him down and follows up with a big chop. A slam puts Jacques down and it’s a Superfly Splash for a quick elimination. Rude comes in next and swivels his hips, only to get headbutted into a tag from Perfect. Rude accidentally low bridges Perfect so Snuka rams them together and the Brood is in trouble.
Off to Piper vs. Perfect and the Brood’s luck continues to go bad. Luke comes in and drops a knee before it’s off to Snuka for more shots to the head. Back to Luke for more biting and Butch beats on him a bit more. Piper comes in to face Raymond and for some reason Rougeau tries to slug it out with Piper. A superkick puts Piper down for two but he piledrives Raymond for the easy pin and it’s 4-2.
Perfect comes in with his neck snap for two and for the first time, Piper’s team is in trouble. Piper comes back with a slingshot to send Perfect into the post. Butch comes in for some basic stuff but it’s quickly back to Luke. Piper comes back in for some rapid fire punches and Perfect is in trouble. Back to Butch for more biting but he poses too long and Perfect rolls him up for the elimination.
Piper tries to steal a pin on a rollup to Perfect but it only gets two. Off to Snuka before Luke headbutts Perfect in the stomach. Rude makes a blind tag but jumps into a punch to the gut. Luke ducks his head and the Rude Awakening ties us up at two each. It’s Piper/Snuka vs. Rude/Perfect which is a heck of a midcard tag match.
Rude vs. Snuka starts the final four off and Rude swivels a bit more. Perfect comes in and taunts Piper, drawing him in so Snuka can get double teamed. Snuka finally gets in a shot to break Perfect’s momentum but Rude gets the tag before Piper can come in. Snuka grabs a quick small package for two before taking Perfect down with a flying headbutt. They hit head to head and both guys go down, followed by a double tag.
We finally get Piper vs. Rude which is what this whole match is based on. Piper easily wins a slugout and backdrops Rude down. They fight to the floor and it’s a double countout, getting us down to Snuka vs. Perfect. Perfect hits a great looking dropkick to put Snuka on the floor which eventually gets two. Snuka gets in a chop in the corner and a cross body for two. The Perfectplex out of nowhere gives Perfect the win.
Rating: C-. They did the right thing by having the tag teams get knocked out quick because they didn’t mean anything in this at all. Other than that though there was nothing of note here. Piper and Rude were both counted out to make sure they stayed strong and Snuka didn’t mean anything at this point. Nothing to see here but it wasn’t bad or anything.
The Rude Brood celebrates and Rude says don’t worry about Heenan being gone.
The Ultimate Warriors are very fired (and likely coked) up. Warrior’s topic of the night: orga donor cards.
Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family
Ultimate Warrior, Jim Neidhart, Rockers
Andre the Giant, Arn Anderson, Haku, Bobby Heenan
Andre can barely move and it’s sad to see. Neidhart and the Rockers start before anything happens and Jim is in trouble early. Here’s Warrior without any music (he’s IC Champion here) and a big clothesline puts Andre on the floor, which draws a countout because when the bell rang, Andre was the only Heenan Family member in the ring. We’ve already got the same problem the Hogan match had.
Warrior and Haku get things started for all intents and purposes but it’s quickly off to Anvil vs. Arn. Andre (in blue instead of black) yells incoherently at the Warrior as he leaves. It’s Haku vs. Anvil now with Haku in control. A superkick puts Neidhart down and eliminates him like it’s a squash match. Off to Shawn to make Haku miss him and now it’s off to Jannetty.
Haku tries a double clothesline but only hits Shawn. He picks up Marty but Shawn dropkicks Marty down onto Haku for a near fall. Off to Arn who tries a double suplex with Haku on Jannetty, but Shawn catches his partner in a nice move. Double superkicks put the wrestlers on the other team down and it’s off to Marty vs. Haku. Warrior gets a tag in a few seconds later and Haku immediately goes for the eyes.
Haku backs Warrior into the corner and Heenan points to Arn for the tag in a funny bit. Arn immediately gets taken down and Marty hooks an armbar. Anderson brings Marty to the corner and brings in Heenan for a single punch before it’s back to Haku. Arn knees Marty in the back and Haku superkicks him down so Heenan can drop a knee on Jannetty for the pin. You could loudly hear them calling spots on that sequence for some reason.
Warrior comes in so here’s Anderson again. There’s a bearhug by the Champ and Haku gets one as well. Off to Shawn who gets knocked to the floor with a few shots. Shawn moonsaults out of the corner over Arn and Anderson is in trouble. Warrior and Michaels both punch Anderson at the same time and Arn backs away from Warrior. A splash from Shawn gets two and it’s off to Haku.
That doesn’t last long at all as a cross body eliminates Haku to get us down to Warrior/Shawn vs. Heenan/Anderson. Heenan tries to get in some cheap shots on Shawn which draws in Warrior. Why? Was he that afraid for Shawn’s safety? Arn dumps Shawn to the floor and Heenan goes up….and then regains his sanity and climbs back down. Arn keeps asking for help from Heenan because he’s getting tired so it’s finally back to Bobby who runs at the first sign of trouble.
Shawn rams his head into the back of Arn’s head and both guys are down. They slug it out but Shawn walks into the spinebuster (called the Anderson Drop) for the elimination. Warrior fires off some shoulders but Arn ducks and sends him to the floor. Heenan goes up again but thinks better of it again. Off to Heenan but Warrior quickly Hulks up so we see some more Anderson. Warrior fights him off as well and whips Arn into Heenan to knock Bobby to the floor. The gorilla press and splash get us down to one on one. Warrior sneaks up on Heenan and what do you think happens here? A shoulder block and splash ends this.
Rating: C-. I think it was watching the whole show before this but this was another dull match. Warrior was never in any danger and I think everyone knew it. To be fair, this would have been better with Tully out there and you can’t fault the guys for that. Heenan being in there had to turn it into a comedy match and I can’t hold that against them. Still though, another dull match in a series of them tonight.
Warrior sprints up the aisle and clotheslines Heenan as he leaves to end the show.
Overall Rating: D. There are multiple problems associated with this show. First of all, nothing here is what you would call good. The matches are all ok at best and nothing beyond that. I guess the best match would be the opener, but even that was just ok. This was a really weak time in the company as they had Hogan but he had beaten everyone already so there’s nothing for him to do really.
However there’s a bigger problem with Survivor Series overall. In short, what’s the point of any of this stuff? No stories are advanced here, other than the first match there was no clean fall between the people the feuding people, and there’s nothing to build off here. Look at Hogan. If you have Hogan lose in that match with DiBiase putting him to sleep after that much of a beating, you have a new opponent for him.
Instead, we have Hogan standing tall again which is nothing new at all. That’s the problem with the first few shows other than the first one. Survivor Series went nowhere and the appeal died very quickly. That wouldn’t change until 1991 so 1990 was somehow even more boring to sit through.
Wait I’m not done.
So as I mentioned, there was another match talked about inside a cage between Hogan/Beefcake and Zeus/Savage. This was a dark match at a TV taping in I believe Nashville. It was released as a PPV special called No Holds Barred: The Movie and The Match. Let’s get to it.
Hulk Hogan/Brutus Beefcake vs. Zeus/Randy Savage
This is one of like three matches Zeus ever had. Both guys have to escape to win. Vince and Jesse are on commentary. Beefcake gets in first but Sherri slams the door on Hogan to keep him out of the cage. Savage chokes Hogan through the cage as Zeus destroys Beefcake. Sherri locks the cage as Hulk punches Savage through the bars. The crowd is on fire for this. Hogan comes in over the top and makes the save as it’s time for the big showdown with Zeus.
Hogan slams Zeus into the cage a few times and down goes the monster. Savage gets whipped HARD into the cage by Brutus and both heels eat Hogan boots in the corner. Zeus gets double teamed but he sends both Hogan and Beefcake into the cage to take over. Savage tries to climb out but Beefcake stops him. Sherri tries to help Savage but Beefcake rams their heads together to keep Savage in the match.
Savage and Zeus ram both guys into the cage over and over which is a very basic yet very smart strategy for a match like this. Beefcake comes back and rams Zeus and Savage into the cage and all four guys are down. The referee unlocks the door to see what he should do, but Sherri rams the cage onto Hebner’s head and slides Savage the cage.
We load up the big spot of the match as Savage climbs the cage. Vince is freaking out. Jesse: “Well who’s going to stop it McMahon? You can’t do nothing about it.” Savage goes up to the top of the cage and wraps the chain around his hand. He dives at Beefcake but Brutus hits him in the ribs on the way down.
Beefcake gets the chain and pounds on Savage as Hogan can’t slam Zeus. Savage and Beefcake climb at the same time and it’s Hulk Up time. Beefcake gets over the top as Savage goes through the door and it’s one on one. Hogan slams Zeus, rams him into the cage about four times, slams him again, drops an insane THREE LEGS and Zeus is DEAD. The pin is academic.
Rating: B. That’s likely high, but this was absolutely perfect for what it was supposed to be. This was a TV taping main event and the fans got to see Hogan DESTROY his biggest rival at the time. The match was a ton of fun with Hogan in his late 80s goodness. Hogan vs. Zeus was actually going to be the Mania 6 main event for awhile until Vince woke up and put Warrior in there instead.
Ratings Comparison:
Dream Team vs. Enforcers
Original: B-
Redo: C+
King’s Court vs. 4x4s
Original: B+
Redo: D+
Hulkamaniacs vs. Million Dollar Team
Original: D-
Redo: C
Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies
Original: D
Redo: C-
Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family
Original: C+
Redo: C-
Overall Rating
Original: D+
Redo: D
Bonus Match
Original: B-
Redo: B
I think the difference here is that with the original I didn’t like it at all but with the new one I got bored by it because it just keeps going and going.
Today is a guy who had some very different gimmicks: Barry Darsow.
Darsow got his start in 1983 after attending Robinsdale High School with Rick Rude, Curt Hennig, Tom Zenk, John Nord and Nikita Koloff. That’s quite the class. We’ll start things off with Darsow as Crusher Khrushchev, a Russian sympathizer, at AWA Superclash 1985.
NWA Six Man Titles: Krusher Khruschev/Ivan Koloff/Nikita Koloff vs. Crusher/Dick the Bruiser/Baron Von Raschke
This is Crockett vs. AWA and the Russians are the champions of course. Big brawl to start and we eventually get down to Crusher vs. Krusher. Crusher bolo punches his way to prosperity and brings in the Baron. Nikita comes in and runs from the Claw. Nikita was a killing machine and he’s running from an old bald guy holding his hand in the air. Ivan comes in and gets beaten up by the old man as well.
Here’s Dick The Bruiser who is a scary man. He and the Crusher are identical. Dick and Ivan have a test of strength with the evil Russian cheating to escape. Back to Crusher vs. Krusher with Crusher taking over and bringing Baron back in. Ivan comes back in and takes Crusher down. He hits a legdrop which Nelson calls illegal. I’m not even touching that one. Crusher makes his comeback and it’s off to the Bruiser. Baron comes in and drops a leg which isn’t mentioned by Nelson. There’s the Claw and everything breaks down. We cut to a wide shot then go back to see Ivan pinning Baron.
Rating: D+. The ending is as quick as it sounds and since Larry didn’t see it either, we have no idea what knocked Baron out. I think you could see both other Russians but things were moving too fast. Nikita should have been in there running over people though as it’s what he was best at. This is the AWA though so it doesn’t think things through at times.
Off to the NWA with the same character at Starrcade 1985.
Mid-Atlantic Title: Krusher Khrushchev vs. Sam Houston
Speaking of crowning new champions, this is a tournament final because former champion Buzz Tyler had left the territory. Krusher is more famous as Smash from Demolition and this is his power vs. Houston’s speed. Houston is a cowboy character and the half brother of Jake Roberts. There’s something wrong with Tony’s mic as you can only hear whispers of what he’s saying.
Houston slips down and sends Krusher to the floor before holding his own in a slugout back inside. Krusher will have none of that and grabs Sam by the throat to slam him down. An elbow drop misses though and we’re back to a standoff. Houston grabs a headlock and a headscissors to take Krusher down. Khrushchev tries everything he can to get out of it before just picking Houston up and placing him on the top rope. Houston comes right back with an armdrag into an armbar and Krusher is down again.
Back up again and Krusher just throws him into the air and lets Sam crash down onto his face. Why over complicate things when you can do them that simply I guess. Krusher does the same thing off a gorilla press before punching Houston right in the jaw. Off to a bearhug but Houston fights out of it pretty quickly. The Russian goes up but gets crotched down, allowing Sam to pound away in the corner. The bulldog (Sam’s finisher) hits but Krusher gets his foot on the ropes. Sam celebrates too much and Krusher hits the Russian Sickle for the pin and the title.
Rating: C+. Nice little match here with a basic power vs. speed formula. Khrushchev was your typical American Russian (he was from Minnesota) so thankfully he didn’t talk all that much. Houston was way too small to be taken seriously and his career never took off, even in the far less serious WWF in the late 80s.
Another tag match at Starrcade 1986.
US Tag Titles: Krusher Khrushchev/Ivan Koloff vs. Kansas Jayhawks
The Jayhawks are Bobby Jaggers and Dutch Mantell, the latter of which would eventually join the WWE under a variety of names, including Zeb Colter. This is a rematch of a tournament final where the Russians won the belts and there are no disqualifications. Dutch and Ivan start things off but it’s quickly off to Jaggers to pound away on the older Russian. Ivan actually busts out a rollup for two but it’s quickly back to Dutch to work on the arm.
Krusher gets a tag in and it’s time for some stalling. Mantell pounds away on the forehead and the Jayhawks choke away in the corner before it’s off to Jaggers again. That goes nowhere so here’s Dutch again, but those sneaky Russians trick him into some double teaming. The power of AMERICA saves him from the Russians though and Dutch fights both guys off with relative ease. Ivan sends Dutch to the floor though and into the barricade to shift control.
Off to Krusher for some double teaming, but Dutch fights back with a double clothesline and there’s the hot tag to Jaggers. Some AMERICAN right hands have the Russians in trouble and a clothesline gets two on Ivan. Everything breaks down but there’s nothing the referee can do because it’s no disqualification. Ivan goes up top but gets hit by Dutch’s whip to bring him down. Krusher is sent to the floor but sneaks back up onto the apron to hit Jaggers in the back of the head with the chain, allowing Ivan to get the easy pin to retain the titles.
Rating: C. Another basic tag match here but it was at a slightly faster pace, making it a more entertaining match for the most part. The Russians continue to be a perfectly fine midcard heel act as the Cold War was still going on at this point. The Jayhawks never did much of anything as a team and would fade into obscurity pretty soon after the start of the new year.
It was off to the WWF as Smash of Demolition. We’ll start with a battle royal
Battle Royal
André the Giant, Ron Bass, Demolition (Ax and Smash), Billy Jack Haynes, Hercules, Hillbilly Jim, Hulk Hogan, The Honky Tonk Man, The Islanders (Haku and Tama), The Killer Bees (B. Brian Blair and Jim Brunzell), Blackjack Mulligan, Paul Orndorff, Lanny Poffo, Butch Reed, Sika, Nikolai Volkoff, and Koko B. Ware.
So in other words, it’s everyone but Savage and Steamboat plus a few tag teams. Smash is the original Smash and not Barry Darsow and Honky is wearing suspenders. Andre won’t let Hogan get in. Orndorff jumps Hogan to prevent the showdown. More or less all of the heels jump Hogan and all of the faces jump Andre. Honky is out thanks to Hogan. Andre puts Sika out.
These are hard to commentate on as it’s just eliminations and fights. Haku, a face at this point, is out. Andre headbutts Lanny Poffo and he’s BUSTED OPEN, and I mean BAD. Totally hard way too. That is a sick cut. They have to get a stretcher to get him out. That’s impressive. Other than that it’s pretty much you punch me and I’ll punch you in the ring. Ron Bass is out as is Mulligan.
The ultimate Hogan jobber, Volkoff, is gone. We’re just killing time to get to Hogan vs. Andre as Blair is out. HERE WE GO! Hogan blocks a punch…and Koko jumps on Andre to be annoying. Hogan throws out Orndoff but gets jumped by Andre who does the headbutts to the back of the head and throws him out easily. WOW.
In a VERY funny moment, Hogan and Andre are doing a staredown and Koko tries to jump Andre. Giant just smacks him in the head without even turning around. That was hilarious. Everyone gets together to throw Andre out.
Ok we’re down to Koko, Reed, Smash, Billy Jack Haynes and Hercules. Koko puts Reed out and we get faces vs. heels. Koko is out thank goodness and then we get rid of Smash too to get us down to the full nelson guys. Haynes goes for Bobby and there he goes for Hercules to win, which is probably the biggest win of his career somehow.
Rating: D. This was about Hogan vs. Andre and while that did happen, it was all of ten seconds long. Before and after that though, no one cared. This just wasn’t that interesting at all and it was about ten seconds out of eleven minutes. That can’t be a good sign. You probably should just go watch Wrestlemania instead.
Demolition would take off around this point so we’ll jump ahead to Summerslam 1989.
Twin Towers/Andre the Giant vs. Demolition/Jim Duggan
Duggan is King of the WWF and has his face painted like Demolition but is rocking an American flag pattern of course. Akeem starts with the King with Duggan absorbing the trash talk and pounding away on the big man before it’s off to Ax for some pounding on the arm. Smash comes in and Demolition pounds Akeem down before bringing Duggan back in to crank on the arm as well.
Akeem finally gets in a shot to Ax’s ribs and it’s off to Boss Man who is immediately pounded down by the fresh Smash. Boss Man rakes the eyes to slow Smash down but Smash rakes the eyes right back in a good bit. Ax comes in again and cranks on the arm but gets sent into the wrong corner so Andre can come in and pound away with big right hands.
Akeem comes back in but misses a slow motion splash, allowing for the hot tag back to Smash who slams Akeem down in an impressive power display. Everything breaks down and Akeem hits a bottom rope splash on Smash, but Duggan hits Akeem in the back with the 2×4 to give Smash the pin.
Rating: C. It wasn’t much of a match but for above seven and a half minutes with these six guys, this was as good as you were going to get. Duggan was about as big as he was going to get in the WWF at this point as the fans were WAY into his Hogan-Lite character. Demolition was fresh off losing the tag titles but but they were still the most popular tag team in the company. Good, fun little match here which was much better than I was expecting.
Smash was part of the greatest Survivor Series team of all time in 1989.
Hulkamaniacs vs. Million Dollar Team
Hulk Hogan, Demolition, Jake Roberts
Ted DiBiase, Zeus, Powers of Pain
My goodness that’s an amazing face team. Ok, so now I get to explain Zeus. A month or two ago, WWE released No Holds Barred, a movie Hogan made in the late 80s, on DVD. The villain in the movie is named Zeus and you may notice he’s here. Zeus is played by an actor (not a wrestler mind you) named Tom Lister and the idea is that he’s living his character and is coming to beat Hogan up “in real life” because he lost in the movie. This would be like the guy who played Goldfinger trying to get revenge on Sean Connery. To make things even better, this was originally going to be the main event of Wrestlemania 6.
I’m sure you can see the problems mounting up already, with the main one being that Zeus doesn’t know how to wrestle. Other than that, there’s the idea that the movie barely broke even so a lot of people didn’t get the idea of the story. A positive twist to this is that a lot of people didn’t get the idea of the story, which probably kept the company from being laughed at more than they already were. Zeus wrestled like four matches ever, most of which were short or tag matches so he wasn’t in the ring long. WCW, the geniuses that they are, brought him back seven years later and put him in the main event of another PPV.
Anyway back to the match. The Million Dollar Team won’t let them get inside until Jake fires in the snake to chase them all away. Hogan and Demolition are the champions that you would expect them to be at this point. Zeus wants to fight Hogan one on one but their respective partners hold them both back. Jake starts with Zeus but the actor wants Hogan. They stare each other down and Hogan bounces off Zeus. Hogan pounds away but nothing hurts Zeus at all.
Instead Hulk finds the one weak spot on Zeus by raking the eyes. He slams Zeus down and amazingly enough, IT DOESN’T REALLY DO MUCH. Barbarian hits Hogan in the back of the head and Zeus twists Hogan’s neck around. He starts choking away and it’s a DQ for Zeus who is only pulled off by DiBiase and the promise of money. Just to clarify, we’re giving the Hulkamaniacs, an 80s dream team, a man advantage. Also why would DiBiase get Zeus off Hogan? Wouldn’t Hogan’s pain and agony make DiBiase happy?
It’s DiBiase vs. Hogan now and Hulk is in big trouble. DiBiase hammers away in the corner but Hulk gets a boot up in the corner and there’s the tag to Jake. A clothesline puts DiBiase on the floor and it’s off to Ax who demolishes DiBiase with ease. Smash comes in and they both pound Ted down. Back to Hogan who triple teams DiBiase along with Demolition. Back to Ax with a clothesline but DiBiase elbows him down out of desperation.
Off to Warlord as these two teams are still feuding even a year later. Come to think of it there wasn’t much else in between for those guys either. Dang did the division fall that fast in just a year? A shoulder breaker puts Ax down but Barbarian misses a middle rope elbow. Off to Warlord again but he gets clotheslined down. Fuji trips Ax up and a basic elbow drop is enough to tie the score.
It’s Smash vs. Warlord now but it’s quickly off to Hogan. Hulk softens him up to bring in Jake, which Jesse calls a mismatch. That’s likely based on power but I’m pretty sure Jake is taller than Warlord. Off to Smash but Warlord pokes him in the eye to take over. Back to Barbarian whose big boot is caught but Smash misses the elbow. DiBiase comes back in with those falling punches of his which get two.
It’s chinlock time with a knee in Smash’s back. DiBiase misses a middle rope back elbow of all things but Smash won’t tag for some reason. Barbarian makes a blind tag so the hot shot Smash hits on DiBiase doesn’t count and Barbarian takes his head off with a top rope clothesline for the pin. Jake comes in next but he can’t DDT Barbarian. Barbie whips Jake into the corner with authority although I’m not sure who’s authority it was.
Back to Warlord as things slow down a lot due to exhaustion. Jake dives for a tag but DiBiase slaps Hogan to draw him in instead. DiBiase piledrives Jake but Roberts gets a foot on the ropes to Jesse’s annoyance. Barbarian misses a headbutt and there’s the hot tag to Barbarian. He cleans house and gets two on Barbarian off a big boot. A suplex gets the same and my goodness how rare is it to see Hogan get a two count? Hogan fights off both Powers of Pain but they catch him in a spike piledriver which is good for a DQ for both of them, making it Hogan/Roberts vs. DiBiase.
Dibiase drops knees on Hogan before slapping on the Million Dollar Dream. That eventually gets two arm drops and Jake makes the save. That’s actually a nice touch as it makes the hold look stronger by needing a save instead of Hogan saving himself. Hogan finally breaks the hold and punches a jumping DiBiase. Hot tag brings in the Snake who cleans house. Jake drives in knees on DiBiase’s head as Hogan is dying in the corner.
Here’s Virgil to interfere and take the DDT. DiBiase drops a fist on Jake and puts his feet on the ropes to steal the pin. Ted pounds on Hogan who is still reeling from the long Million Dollar Dream. I’ll give him credit as that’s some great selling of a hold like that. Off to a chinlock and Hogan taps, which wouldn’t mean a thing for years. Hogan breaks the hold but they clothesline each other. DiBiase belly to back suplexes him and it’s Hulk Up time. You know the rest and there’s the legdrop.
Rating: C. There’s one major problem with this match: the first four minutes of this match give away the ending almost immediately. How can you give Hogan, Roberts and Demolitio a man advantage that fast? I’m not saying Hogan should have lost, but the Zeus stuff could have come later in the match and worked much better. Have Zeus stand on the apron most of the match and it would have worked fine. The fans finally reacted though.
Time for a six man at SNME XXVIII.
Ultimate Warrior/Legion of Doom vs. Demolition
Has there ever been a better collection of theme music in one match? The LOD cost Demolition the tag belts and Warrior is there….uh because. This would be a Survivor Series match in a month with Hennig and Tornado joining them. Piper points this out. We get a shot of Dustin Rhodes in the crowd. Keep that in mind as it’ll come into play later on. Warrior comes in and just destroys people.
The splash misses Axe though and he’s Smash. Demolition was more or less worthless by this point and would get squashed at Mania and be done. Hawk comes in and just wipes them out. You can see the crushing of them beginning. He continues the trend of beating all of Demolition by himself. Everybody comes in and brawls but Smash is more or less dead and gets caught by the splash for the pin. This was domination in every sense of the word.
Rating: D. Just not interesting at all as Demolition was made to look like a bunch of jobbers here. I don’t think anyone ever bought them anymore once the LOD showed up. Not the worst match ever, but a little challenge would have been nice. I still can’t believe we never got the big tag match with Demolition vs. the LOD. It should have written itself.
Off to Prime Time Wrestling on May 14, 1991 for a rare singles match.
Smash vs. Jake Roberts
Jake chases him to the floor but gets caught in a wristlock to slow things down. Roberts fights up with some punches before taking over on the arm as well. There’s the knee lift but Smash bails away from the DDT. Back in and Jake is sent hard into the corner but Smash charges into a knee in the corner. Mr. Fuji uses his cane to break up a DDT attempt and Smash gets two off a side suplex. Not that it matters though as Jake floats over and plants Smash with the DDT for the pin.
Rating: D. Nothing to see here but did anyone consider Smash to be a serious opponent for a guy like Roberts? Demolition was dead in the water at this point and Smash would quickly be repackaged into the Repo Man. Jake on the other hand would turn heel and become one of the best villains in recent memory.
Speaking of Repo Man, here he is in one of the few logical stories he ever had. From This Tuesday In Texas.
Ted DiBiase/Repo Man vs. Virgil/Tito Santana
One thing modern WWE programming is great about is recapping stuff. That helps a ton as to someone that is randomly seeing this, this match makes NO sense. In reality, DiBiase had said that Virgil had stolen the Million Dollar Belt and recruited Repo Man to help him get it back, which worked. Since we need to fill in a match slot here, Tito joined Virgil and we get this match. The faces are already in the ring so what do you expect to happen here?
Virgil’s career is in essence over as far as importance goes here. He just had nothing to do once he left DiBiase and that singles feud went on about as long as it could so the WWF kept it going for another few months after it. Repo here is of course Smash from Demolition if you weren’t aware of that. Santana is more or less worthless here as El Matador.
The problem is that after that, no one remembered the great work he did as Tito Santana, as he was just remembered for the stupid gimmick that he did. As for the match, there’s not a lot to say. It’s your standard filler tag match that could have been on any house show or TV show of the era. I don’t know if it’s good enough for here but we’ll see I guess. Repo Man and DiBiase might be the weirdest combination of all time.
The main problem here is that there’s no point to having Santana in there. He didn’t have any feud with either guy that I can remember other than a few random matches with Repo that would have happened just because they were on the same level of the card. This is just a weird combination to have. The wrestling is fine, but it just comes off as weird all around. The match itself is once again the same kind of match that you would expect to see at a house show or on TV.
It’s actually not bad to be fair. It’s nothing to go out of your way to see, but I don’t have a problem with it being on a low level Tuesday PPV. The problem here is that Virgil is the guy that’s getting the hot tag. How is that appealing? With Sherri making a distraction, Repo hits him in the back with a knee to allow DiBiase to get the pin.
Rating: C. This was ok I guess, but it wasn’t anything great. The faces were just overly matched here and it was really easy to tell that. The formula worked fine here as it ca be expected with guys like DiBiase and Santana out there though, so that balances out I guess. This was pure filler.
We’ll jump ahead to Wrestlemania VIII for an eight man tag.
Jim Duggan/Sgt. Slaughter/Virgil/Big Boss Man vs. Nasty Boys/Moutnie/Repo Man
Just a collection of lower midcard guys getting a Wrestlemania payday here. Neither team gets an entrance. Instead, Ray Combs of Family Feud is guest ring announcer for this and cracks a few jokes about the heels pre-match. The good guys clean house to start and hit a quadruple clothesline to clear the ring. Heenan announces that Shawn Michaels has left the building. Gorilla sums up our responses: “WHO CARES???”
Anyway Duggan and Sags start things off and it’s Jim hitting a few clotheslines to take over. Off to Slaughter who gets poked in the eye, allowing for the tag to Knobs. Slaughter pounds away to take over before it’s off to Boss Man for a boot to the face. Brian avoids a charge into the corner and Boss Man’s splash misses Repo Man as well, giving the heels control for a bit. Repo crotches himself and Boss Man slugs him down for good measure.
Off to Virgil who seems to mess up almost anything where he jumps into the air. Duggan tries to come in to save his partner but it’s back to Sags to beat on Virgil even more. A pumphandle slam gets two on Virgil and it’s back to Mountie. Everything breaks down and in the melee the Nastys are rammed together, allowing Virgil to steal the pin.
Rating: D. As I said, this was nothing more than a way to throw a bunch of guys onto the show at the same time. This was a much better idea than having four matches eat up a few minutes each as it accomplishes the same goal here. They were out there as filler before the world title match and there’s nothing wrong with that at all.
Here’s a quick match from Summerslam 1992.
Repo Man vs. Crush
Repo tries to jump Crush but has no effect and earns himself a gorilla press slam. We head to the floor for a clothesline from Crush before heading back inside for some kicks to Repo’s ribs. Crush pounds on the ribs even more and hits a backbreaker, only to be poked in the eye to break the momentum. Repo hits a belly to back suplex but Crush no sells it and snaps off a belly to belly. A top rope knee drop misses and Repo goes after the knee with some very basic stuff. An elbow drop gets two and Crush easily fights up, catches Repo coming off the top in a powerslam and hooks the Head Vice for the submission.
Rating: D. This was a glorified squash to make Crush look good. They were this close to making Crush the next big thing in 1993 so seeing him look good here isn’t surprising at all. Repo Man is really impressive as he went from Smash to the new gimmick so smoothly that I didn’t realize it was the same guy until years later.
We’ll jump to WCW now with Darsow as the Black Top Bully, an evil truck driver. From SuperBrawl V.
Blacktop Bully vs. Dustin Rhodes
Bully is more commonly known as Smash or Repo Man. This is seriously the best they could put together? Dustin would be fired for the rematch: the King of the Road match, where the idea was they were in the back of a big truck which was driving along the road and the first person to pull a horn got the win. It’s somehow worse than it sounds but we’ll get to that later. Meng is thrown out before the match starts.
This is seriously Dustin Rhodes against the battling truck driver. Dustin is wearing gold by the way. That’s rather amusing. Naturally this is mainly a fight. I can’t get over the fact that this feud was already in FREAKING WARGAMES and we’re still having it here, 5 months later. Seriously, what in the world could there be left to fight about? The scary thing is that the feud ended because Dustin got fired, not because the feud itself ended.
Bully’s finisher is called the Breaker 1 9. Oh dear indeed. They’re having Smash work a ten minute plus technical match. Honestly, who thought this was smart? You have Sting and Savage in the next match and this is going to get more time than that. You could serious watch this match in fast forward and you wouldn’t miss anything. I mean it’s the same stuff over and over again with nothing new added in at all.
Unless you like hearing truck driving jokes from Tony and hearing him worship Dusty Rhodes which could take all day then there’s no reason to watch this. Rhodes is in trouble and Heenan says come on Bully, give him that parking ticket. In other words, Heenan is so gone that for one thing, he thinks that sounds good and number two, he thinks truck drivers have the authority to give parking tickets.
We spend three minutes talking about that Rhodes fire. And don’t let me get started about how many Rhodes and driving a truck on said Rhodes jokes they used. Dustin suplexes Parker in and that’s apparently a big deal. Never mind the whole double cage match where Dustin got to beat the living tar out of him. In one of the most clichéd endings there is, Dustin goes for a suplex and Parker hooks his foot so that Bully is able to get the pin. Heenan must have had a shot as he’s slurring again.
Rating: G. This is beyond failing. Let me make this clear: Goldust and Repo Man had an 18 minute match where we had non-stop truck driver jokes. We kept hearing about that stupid top wristlock (yes, that’s what Darsow’s finisher was. Smash’s real name is Barry Darsow in case you didn’t know) and we never even see it. This is now I believe the standard method of torture in 9 states.
And it somehow got worse. From Uncensored 1995.
Blacktop Bully vs. Dustin Rhodes
For some reason WCW thought this was a good idea. See if you can figure this out: they’re in the back of a truck driving around Atlanta. The winner is the first person to get to the end of the truck and pull a horn. Both guys bladed which was illegal at the time and were fired for it. There are bales of hay in the back of it also. Yep, WCW isn’t a hick company AT ALL. Oh hey let’s get a police escort and a helicopter too.
This must have been SO fun for the people in the arena. I mean my goodness: SOMEONE GOT PAID FOR THIS!!! The problem here is that no one can actually stand up at all as they’re IN A MOVING TRUCK! Two idiots have to actually sit in the cab and watch this. Seriously, WHO CAME UP WITH THIS IDEA??? Yep there goes the sunlight. Oh I forgot to mention: this has been edited to Zimbabwe and back so the light changes about every 5 seconds.
Hey, let’s run a stop sign on film and show a shot of the truck driver for no apparent reason. They aren’t even really fighting. It’s them wandering from one end of the truck to another and hitting the other guy with a bale of hay. And all of a sudden Dustin is 8 feet away from where he was a second ago. Not to mention they had to rent the truck. The camera work here is crap as we can’t let anyone see blood. Nothing dumb about this AT ALL.
They actually call this a match. I’m stunned. Hey something good happens for once: the camera in the helicopter breaks up. Someone up there likes me. Oh hey, let’s sit on the side of a moving truck and hang off the side while a guy punches me. Nothing bad can happen from this. This has been going on over 8 minutes and they might have interacted for 50 seconds total. Other than that it’s stumbling around and trying to grab the horn.
It’s also gotten lighter so apparently this has gone on all night. It certainly feels like it. They’re up on the beam together and Dustin gets knocked off, allowing the Bully to pull the horn and win I guess. In the arena fireworks go off. This is a BAD idea already isn’t it?
Rating: H. As in HOLY GOODNESS WHAT IN THE WORLD WERE THEY SMOKING TO COME UP WITH THIS????? Do I even need to make fun of this? Dustin took off and put on his shirt twice, yet you never saw him do it once. See what I’m working with here? The blading in the match would get Dustin fired and get him a job in WWF as Goldust, making it the best thing he ever could have done.
Darsow would be brought back in to WCW for a few shots on Nitro, including this one on March 9, 1998.
Goldberg vs. Barry Darsow
Darsow is more famous as Smash from Demolition or Repo Man. He’s just Barry Darsow, guy in trunks here though. Goldberg immediately takes him down by the leg before running Barry over with a shoulder block. A lariat sends Darsow to the floor and Goldberg rams him into the barricade and post. Goldberg misses a shoulder into the post though and Darsow goes after the arm. The arm is sent into the buckle but Goldberg snaps awake and hits the spear and Jackhammer for the quick pin.
And again on Nitro, September 21, 1998.
Finlay vs. Barry Darsow
They circle each other until Darsow hammers him into the corner but Finlay uppercuts him back. We hit an early nerve hold on Barry followed by a simple pull of the face but Darsow comes back with choking and a chinlock. Finlay counters a piledriver attempt and the tombstone is enough to pin Barry.
Rating: D. Pretty boring brawl for the most part here with Darsow not being interesting at all. Finlay was a decent enough midcarder but he needed more to work with out there. I’ve never understood the mentality behind booking these meaningless matches in the first hour. You have an uncontested hour with no Raw and this is how you use it?
One more time with Darsow as a golfer named Mr. Hole In One Barry Darsow on Saturday Night, December 19, 1998.
Barry Darsow vs. Kaz Hayashi
Darsow comes out with a bag of clubs and unrolls a mini putting green. He says he got two holes in one in a single round last week. Kaz says he’s played golf before but there may be some communication issues as he can only say yes. Hayashi has to sink a put in order to get a match with Darsow but he doesn’t seem to understand. Kaz puts the clubs in the bag and shoves it over, only to get nailed from behind. Darsow ties him in the Tree of Woe and hammers away but has his golf club taken away. A slam onto the putting green is enough for a DQ.
Much like Barbarian, Darsow is a guy that managed to stick around for a long time but in a different way. Unlike Barbarian, Darsow would take on whatever stupid character he was given and actually seemed to try, which is more than you can say for a lot of people. No he didn’t do much outside of being part of Demolition, but you can’t say he did the same thing over and over again for years.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Neidhart got started in 1979 and we’ll pick things up in Mid-South on January 13, 1984.
Jim Neidhart vs. Tom Lentz
Neidhart goes right after Lentz and the dominance begins. A Samoan drop ends this quick.
Here’s a bit longer match from the WWF on September 14, 1985.
Davey Boy Smith vs. Jim Neidhart
From the same building in September of 85 and I’d guess maybe the same show. Neither guy can get a power advantage so Davey rethinks his attacking method. Both teams are chasing the less talented Dream Team at this point. We get a Stu Hart sex joke of all things. Gorilla wonders how he had time to teach any wrestling since he had thirteen kids. I’ll be over here trying to clean that image from my mind if you need me.
Bulldog takes him to the mat and outworks him. As you may have guessed, Anvil isn’t the best technician in the world. Anvil uses power but gets caught by a dropkick as we stop things again. Off to a top wristlock here but Anvil drills him in the ribs to take care of that. The fans think this is boring so Neidhart stops the wrestling stuff to yell at them a bit. He never was the smartest guy in the world.
Smith is sent to the floor so Anvil follows him out. Into the railing goes the Bulldog and Smith is in trouble. Back in now and it’s all Anvil. Smith fights back and hits a back elbow to take Neidhart down. Hayes is either drunk or really bad at his job. It’s so hard to tell. We hit the chinlock again and Anvil is like screw that and breaks it up. Anvil gets something like a slingshot into the buckle and puts his feet on the ropes for the cheap pin.
Rating: D. Boring match here with no chemistry at all between these two. The power vs. power rarely works which is why both guys had a speed/technical guy as his partner. Also, why in the world are we seeing Anvil get the win here? Was that really the best thing to do on a British Bulldogs’ tape? I don’t get it.
We’ll move on to Boston on March 8, 1986.
Scott McGee vs. Jim Neidhart
How in the world are we over 45 minutes into this show? Alfred, the Englishman, gets Scotland and England confused. Egads to say the least. Jimmy has a new Megaphone it seems. McGee grabs a rollup for two to surprise Neidhart. Test of strength goes well for Anvil as he bites away. McGee gets sent to the announce table as this is another boring semi-squash.
Jimmy says the Harts are splitting into singles matches at the moment because there’s no challenge for them at the moment because they have to beat the Bulldogs first. The match more or less stops for a bit as Gorilla and Jimmy chat. Jimmy has managed to get a siren sound effect on the Megaphone. Neidhart drops McGee throat first to the railing to really take over.
Hayes might be a guest referee for some reason and he says he’ll suck. Ok then. All Anvil here as we’re firmly into the squash territory. Since the match is dull, let’s talk about Piper vs. Mr. T. McGee blocks a suplex into one of his own and down goes Anvil. Some European uppercuts by McGee but a powerslam ends this rather quickly. Guess who won.
Rating: D. Just a squash here as Anvil dominates again. We’re over 50 minutes into this match and they really need to get to something good already. I mean dude, the big match so far has been Sivi Afi vs. Rene Goulet. I’m not sure why the fans haven’t rioted yet but it seems to me like it’s because they’re very patient. Get to something of note, I beg of you.
Here’s a match on the biggest show ever, from Wrestlemania III.
Hart Foundation/Danny Davis vs. British Bulldogs/Tito Santana
Davis is a crooked referee that cost both the Bulldogs and Santana their titles. Apparently this is Davis’ debut as a wrestler. Mary Hart (no relation) is on commentary along with Uecker here as well. Tito beats up Danny before the match before we get going with Bret and Santana. Jesse steals the Bulldogs’ mascot Matilda as he leaves. Off to Davey vs. Anvil and Smith pulls him by the beard. That’s a bit rough even for Neidhart.
Tito comes back in to work on the arm but gets sent to the heel corner for some high quality choking. That goes nowhere so here’s Smith vs. Neidhart again. Jim takes him down with a suplex but Bret misses a middle rope elbow. Dynamite comes in for the chest to buckle bump from Bret but Hart comes back with some punches. Tito tries to break up some interference but only allows even more cheating by Neidhart.
Jim hooks a modified camel clutch on Dynamite before it’s back to Bret. I don’t think we’ve seen Davis in yet but before I can finish that sentence he’s in for a few stomps. That’s the extent of his offense as it’s already back to Bret for some actual skill. The sun is starting to go down so the arena looks dark now. Back to Danny for one kick before it’s time for the Hitman again.
The Harts slingshot Davis right onto Dynamite’s knees and it’s off to Santana for the beating on Davis that the fans have been waiting for. Tito destroys Danny and hits the forearm but Neidhart breaks up the Figure Four. Off to Smith who rams Davis’ head into Dynamite’s. A jumping tombstone (not yet named) kills Davis even more but Smith doesn’t want the cover. There’s the delayed vertical followed by the powerslam but everything breaks down. Davis pops up and hits Smith with the megaphone for the pin in the melee.
Rating: C-. As fun as the beating Davis took was, the ending is really stupid as he popped up like nothing and was able to knock out a power guy with a single shot? The guy was a referee a few months ago but he’s able to do that with one shot? Bad ending aside, this was fun stuff and the fans were WAY into it.
Back to the singles action at Wrestlefest 1988.
Jim Neidhart vs. Lanny Poffo
This was when Poffo was still a leaper and threw out Frisbees with his poetry on them. He was the king of jobbers at this point though so if nothing else he’s not bad. I think his brother would be up next. He uses a moonsault which misses but was a big spot back then as he was the first WWF guy to use it I believe. I think Jim is a heel here but it’s not entirely clear. The crowd is totally dead here. After just beating the tar out of Poffo a powerslam ends it.
Rating: N/A. Total squash here. I think they were toying with splitting up the Harts but that wouldn’t happen for nearly three more years, resulting in Bret breaking out on his own and then Neidhart kind of fading away, although doing so in a positive way. Thankfully they didn’t pull the trigger on him instead of Bret.
Off to a higher profile match on SNME XXI.
Jim Neidhart vs. Randy Savage
Ok seriously, who is Savage fighting tonight? This joke has gone on long enough. Who is Savage really fighting? Nothing against Anvil as he’s fine, but dude, this is RANDY SAVAGE and it’s less than 2 months since his year long title reign ended at Wrestlemania. Why is Anvil out there for this? It just doesn’t make anything resembling sense at all.
They’re making this out to be Savage vs. Bret circa 1992. When did Anvil and Hogan become buddies? Sherri grabs the leg of course and it does nothing of note. Neidhart hooks a bearhug as I’m not even sure what I’m watching. Again, it’s not bad. It’s just odd. We get a great piece of insight from Vince: Sherri is a different human being than Liz.
You mean, they don’t just put different wigs and outfits on them and hope we don’t notice? THANK YOU OWNER OF THE COMPANY! Sweet goodness she’s freaky looking. Anvil gets a BIG kick out, likely throwing Savage high enough in the air that he could have hit the top rope. That’s borderline Yokozuna levels. Anvil gets a slingshot shoulder block which would freaking HURT.
Notice the cameras always getting shots of Sherri’s back. It’s clear Vince was running the company back then given what we know now. This is more or less ALL Anvil here. Sherri unhooks Anvil when his arms are tied up and it lets Savage reset the universe to its natural order as he takes over. Wow that was a long sentence. The elbow finishes soon after.
Rating: B-. This was WAY better than it had any right to be. I don’t think anyone was idiotic enough to think that Anvil was going to win, but still it was nice to see him get in such a long stretch of offense and have time being in control. This was a decent enough match and it got Sherri over as a threat to Savage’s opponents, which was the point here. Not bad at all.
Jim would be in back to back Survivor Series matches starting in 1989.
Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family
Ultimate Warrior, Jim Neidhart, Rockers
Andre the Giant, Arn Anderson, Haku, Bobby Heenan
Andre can barely move and it’s sad to see. Neidhart and the Rockers start before anything happens and Jim is in trouble early. Here’s Warrior without any music (he’s IC Champion here) and a big clothesline puts Andre on the floor, which draws a countout because when the bell rang, Andre was the only Heenan Family member in the ring. We’ve already got the same problem the Hogan match had.
Warrior and Haku get things started for all intents and purposes but it’s quickly off to Anvil vs. Arn. Andre (in blue instead of black) yells incoherently at the Warrior as he leaves. It’s Haku vs. Anvil now with Haku in control. A superkick puts Neidhart down and eliminates him like it’s a squash match. Off to Shawn to make Haku miss him and now it’s off to Jannetty.
Haku tries a double clothesline but only hits Shawn. He picks up Marty but Shawn dropkicks Marty down onto Haku for a near fall. Off to Arn who tries a double suplex with Haku on Jannetty, but Shawn catches his partner in a nice move. Double superkicks put the wrestlers on the other team down and it’s off to Marty vs. Haku. Warrior gets a tag in a few seconds later and Haku immediately goes for the eyes.
Haku backs Warrior into the corner and Heenan points to Arn for the tag in a funny bit. Arn immediately gets taken down and Marty hooks an armbar. Anderson brings Marty to the corner and brings in Heenan for a single punch before it’s back to Haku. Arn knees Marty in the back and Haku superkicks him down so Heenan can drop a knee on Jannetty for the pin. You could loudly hear them calling spots on that sequence for some reason.
Warrior comes in so here’s Anderson again. There’s a bearhug by the Champ and Haku gets one as well. Off to Shawn who gets knocked to the floor with a few shots. Shawn moonsaults out of the corner over Arn and Anderson is in trouble. Warrior and Michaels both punch Anderson at the same time and Arn backs away from Warrior. A splash from Shawn gets two and it’s off to Haku.
That doesn’t last long at all as a cross body eliminates Haku to get us down to Warrior/Shawn vs. Heenan/Anderson. Heenan tries to get in some cheap shots on Shawn which draws in Warrior. Why? Was he that afraid for Shawn’s safety? Arn dumps Shawn to the floor and Heenan goes up….and then regains his sanity and climbs back down. Arn keeps asking for help from Heenan because he’s getting tired so it’s finally back to Bobby who runs at the first sign of trouble.
Shawn rams his head into the back of Arn’s head and both guys are down. They slug it out but Shawn walks into the spinebuster (called the Anderson Drop) for the elimination. Warrior fires off some shoulders but Arn ducks and sends him to the floor. Heenan goes up again but thinks better of it again. Off to Heenan but Warrior quickly Hulks up so we see some more Anderson. Warrior fights him off as well and whips Arn into Heenan to knock Bobby to the floor. The gorilla press and splash get us down to one on one. Warrior sneaks up on Heenan and what do you think happens here? A shoulder block and splash ends this.
Rating: C-. I think it was watching the whole show before this but this was another dull match. Warrior was never in any danger and I think everyone knew it. To be fair, this would have been better with Tully out there and you can’t fault the guys for that. Heenan being in there had to turn it into a comedy match and I can’t hold that against them. Still though, another dull match in a series of them tonight.
And again at Survivor Series 1990.
Million Dollar Team vs. Dream Team
Ted DiBiase, Rhythm and Blues, ???
Dusty Rhodes, Koko B. Ware, Hart Foundation
Rhythm and Blues are Honky Tonk Man and Greg Valentine and the Harts are the tag champions. Dusty and DiBiase are feuding for obvious character reasons. Now we get to the legendary part of the match: the mystery partner. DiBiase gets on the mic and introduces for the first time ever…..THE UNDERTAKER. Who on the planet would have imagined what this guy would become over the next twenty two years? Unreal indeed. The look on Taker’s face is eerie and he stands there like a zombie which makes it even better.
Quick sidebar: the Undertaker is probably the greatest example ever of someone being the only person that could pull off his character. Mark Calaway is PERFECT as the Undertaker with the look and the size and the dead looking eyes and the tattoos and everything like that. Before this he was just Mean Mark Callous in WCW and was a generic big villain. Sometimes it’s about finding what works and Taker has worked for a very long time. Also a bit of trivia: he debuted at a Superstars taping three days before this under the name Kane the Undertaker.
Undertaker and Bret start with Taker pounding the tar out of him. Well if you want to make someone look like a killer, call Bret Hart. Bret hits the ropes and charges at Taker, only to get caught by the throat and slammed down. It was more like a clothesline that Taker went to the mat with than the usual chokeslam here but he did have Bret by the throat.
Off to Neidhart who can’t move Taker at all and gets slammed for trying. Jim looked TERRIFIED and tags out to Koko, who is too stupid to be afraid. Koko misses a charge and clotheslines himself on the top. The Tombstone (I believed named by Gorilla on the spot here) debuts but isn’t exactly the famous version yet, as Taker has both of Koko’s legs on one side of his head and covers with the folded arms but from the sides. It looked and sounded great though.
Bret comes in and hammers on Undertaker who just stares at him. Taker tags in Valentine and gives one of the most evil glares you’ll ever see at Bret. Off to Big Dust who starts gyrating. They chop it out in the corner and it’s off to Anvil. The Harts take their turns working over Valentine’s arm but Greg gets a knee up in the corner. Off to Honky who is rapidly on his way out of the company. Bret makes a blind tag to Neidhart who sneaks in and powerslams Honky out.
DiBiase comes in to jump Neidhart but it’s quickly off to Dusty for the big showdown. It’s back to Neidhart quickly but Virgil trips Jim up and DiBiase clotheslines him down for the pin. Here’s Bret again who pounds away and it’s back to Dream for more of the same. Back to Undertaker who gets some HEIGHT on a jumping stomp to the back of Dusty’s head.
Bret comes in again and chokes Bret in the corner and somehow shows no emotion while at the same time looking angrier than any wrestler I’ve ever seen. Bret fights off DiBiase out of the corner and it’s off to Dusty. Taker comes in, goes up, walks (a little way) down the rope with no one to hold onto, and hits a double ax to eliminate Dusty. Brother Love stomps on Dusty a bit so Dusty chases him off. Undertaker stalks Dusty to the back to get counted out, which is the only thing they could have done with him here.
Back in the ring Bret rolls up Valentine very quickly and it’s DiBiase vs. Hart. Bret pounds on DiBiase and atomic drops him to the floor, followed by a pescado to take Ted out again. DiBiase’s shoulder goes into the post and his head goes into the steps and they head back inside. They slug it out but DiBiase sends him chest first into the buckle to take over.
A quick backslide gets two for Hart and now it’s time for a classic: Bret trips over DiBiase and fakes a knee injury, resulting in a small package for two. Virgil interference messes up and another rollup gets two for Bret. The backbreaker and middle rope elbow get two for Hart but DiBiase rolls through a cross body for the pin.
Rating: C+. This is a very interesting match as you could see stars being made and stars going away. DiBiase clearly didn’t mean as much as he used to and would shift into a tag team run soon after this. Dusty would be gone in January as would Honky. On the other hand you can see the rise of Bret Hart on the horizon as the crowd was LOSING IT over those near falls at the end. Oh and the Undertaker. That’s kind of a big deal.
Here’s Neidhart in a singles match on Superstars, November 9, 1991.
Ric Flair vs. Jim Neidhart
Neidhart, in the big blue pants, runs Flair over with a shoulder to start and no sells some shots in the corner. A backdrop and some clotheslines have the same effect on Flair but he avoids a running knee in the corner. The leg gets wrapped around the post a few times and Flair gets two off a cross body. The Figure Four goes on and the match is stopped pretty fast.
Neidhart would hook up with Owen Hart in a short lived tag team, including this match at Royal Rumble 1992.
Orient Express vs. New Foundation
It’s Owen/Neidhart as the Foundation here. Owen and Kato start thing off here. All four guys look like they’re in pajamas here. Owen takes him down to the mat by the arm before climbing up the ropes (not in the corner mind you but just the ropes) to backflip into the ring for an armdrag. A rana puts Kato down and it’s off to Neidhart vs. Tanaka. Tanaka gets run over as well, so here’s Owen to beat him up.
Tanaka gets caught by an enziguri and it’s back to Neidhart. The Express gets clotheslined down by Jim and Owen adds a double cross body for two. A spinwheel kick gets the same for Hart so Kato tries to come in sans tag. The distraction lets Fuji hit Owen with the cane to finally give the Express control. Tanaka hooks a chinlock as this isn’t exactly as fast paced as last year’s opener.
Owen gets to do Bret’s chest to the buckle bump before charging into a superkick in the other corner for two. After Kato comes in and does nothing, here’s Tanaka again for a headbutt to the abdomen. A chinlock goes nowhere but a headbutt gets two on Owen. Neidhart gets the tag but the referee doesn’t see it of course. The distraction allows Fuji to put the cane on the corner and Owen’s shoulder goes through it in a loud crunch.
It only gets two though as Owen gets a leg over the rope. Kato channels his inner Anderson with a hammerlock slam before it’s back to Tanaka. Owen finally escapes and things break down for a bit, resulting in a double clothesline for two on Hart. A superkick to the chest doesn’t put Owen down, but Tanaka jumping over Kato to land on Hart’s back does. Hart comes back with a dropkick to take out both members of the Express at once. There’s the hot tag to Neidhart and house is cleaned. Owen dives onto Kato before a Rocket Launcher gets the pin on Tanaka.
Rating: B-. Decent match here but it felt like they were trying to do the same match that worked so well in 1991. The problem was the Express wasn’t anything that good anymore and the team was gone almost immediately after this. Either way, the match wasn’t bad and it’s fine for an opener. The New Foundation never quite did anything until 1994 when Owen was a heel.
Neidhart actually did a few shows with WCW, including on Saturday Night on May 1, 1993.
Jim Neidhart/Junkyard Dog vs. Rip Rogers/Chick Donovan
The jobbers are rather, shall we say, effeminate.Dog’s rival Dick Slater comes out to watch as JYD hiptosses Rogers down to start. A headbutt sends Rip out to the floor and it’s off to Anvil for hiptosses to both guys. We hit the armbar on Donovan before it’s back to Dog for a slam. An atomic drop sends Donovan into another slam and there’s a headbutt onto the arm. The Big Thump powerslam sets up a cobra clutch from Anvil for the submission.
Rating: D. Believe it or not, Dog was actually in something resembling shape here and far better than he looked years earlier. Now that being said, I wouldn’t want him on my screen any more than this, but it’s better than what we had to put up with in 1991 or so. Neidhart in WCW never felt right and this is a good example.
Neidhart would head back to the WWF as a heel for some Hart Family matches, including this one on October 19, 1994.
Bret Hart/British Bulldog vs. Owen Hart/Jim Neidhart
Ok, this HAS to be good right? Bret is world champion here so this is probably around August of 94 as that was the top feud around that time. Still in Albany and likely at the same show. Apparently this was October 19, 1994. I’ve always wondered which shows they picked to film and how they were chosen. Bret and Owen start so we’re guaranteed a good start at least. Granted after that last match anything sounds great.
I love Owen celebrating while doing absolutely nothing. Lots of chain wrestling to start as you would expect. Bret works on the arm and gets a crucifix for two. They speed it up a bit and Bret gets a clothesline to put Owen on the floor. Back in and Bret taunts Neidhart, saying he wants the Anvil.
Now here’s a match I don’t think I’ve ever seen. Bret tries his usual stuff but Anvil catches him in a bear hug. Hart bites Anvil’s head to escape and it’s time for power vs. power. Ok never mind as it’s time for Owen vs. Bulldog. They’re getting in and out of there rather fast. Stan Lane continues to be underrated at the announce table. Owen gets caught in the semi-delayed vertical for two.
We hit the chinlock again even though I thought we had hit the quota of chinlocks in the first match. Spinwheel kick puts Bulldog down for two and it’s back to Anvil who puts on a chinlock of his own. The fans are chanting for Owen actually. Owen comes in again and drills Bulldog with some European uppercuts in a nice bit of irony. Shawn Killer Kick makes Smith flip forward and the double teaming commences.
Neidhart back in there now as the heels are working well together here. Bret chases Owen but the referee stops him. This stopping though allows the New Foundation (Owen and Neidhart of course) to hit a Hart Attack on Bulldog for two. Neckbreaker by Owen gets two and we hit the chinlock one more time. This is very much a stop and go kind of match as they’ll get going and then stop for a chinlock etc.
Bulldog fights up and they hit head to head. There’s a tag to Hart but Neidhart had the referee distracted. Heel miscommunication puts Anvil down and there’s the tag to the champion. He beats up both guys while Bulldog just watches on. What a nice partner he is. Russian Leg Sweep gets two on Owen and it’s Five Moves of Doom time. He actually gets the Sharpshooter but Neidhart makes the save. Off to the Bulldog again and everything breaks down. Bulldog gets a small package, Neidhart turns it over, Bret turns it over again and Bulldog pins Owen to end it.
Rating: B-. If you cut out a lot of the rest holds and give it a bit better ending then this would be a much better match. Still though not a bad match at all and I thought it was pretty good. With these four it’s hard not to have a good match. Neidhart was the worst of these four but he’s certainly watchable in the ring. Decent match but could have been much better.
Here’s a sequel ten days later in MSG, for the only time ever.
WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Jim Neidhart
This is fan cam footage so the quality is really low. The place just erupts for Bret. Anvil shoves him to the ropes a few times but gets cross bodied for two. The champ takes a thumb to the eye and bails outside, only to have Jim forearm the post by mistake. Bret sunset flips back in for two but takes his chest bump to give Neidhart control. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Neidhart hammers on Bret’s back and poses. Bret fights out of the corner but charges into a bearhug to slow things down again.
A knee to the ribs gets two for Jim and he whips Hart hard into the corner. There’s a powerslam for two more and they head outside. Bret gets slammed into the steps as Neidhart looks very confident. Hart slingshots him back in though and hammers away before getting two off a small package. We hit the Five Moves of Doom but Neidhart gets a boot up to stop the elbow. Bret gets slammed off the top but avoids a splash, setting up the Sharpshooter to retain.
Rating: D+. This was watchable but I see why it never was a full on program. At the end of the day, Neidhart just didn’t have anything special to throw at Bret besides basic power stuff. The match wasn’t bad due to not even making it nine minutes, but it’s much more of an historical footnote than anything else.
We’ll skip the Who phase (his name was Who. You can figure out the jokes) and get to Jim as part of the Hart Foundation stable at King of the Ring 1997.
Hart Foundation vs. Sid/Legion of Doom
The Harts here are Owen, Jim and Davey, giving us a total of one Hart in the entire Foundation for this match. I love stupid things like that. Why do I have a feeling the heels are going to win and win easily here? This is being written about 3 days after Bret signed with WWE again, so this is very interesting indeed. There’s a sign in the crowd about cheese for no apparent reason.
The faces come out separately which is rather pointless. The LOD get a decent pop but you could tell their time was about over. This takes FOREVER to get going as we get an LOD chant. It’s Owen and Animal to start us up. Hey, call the Superstar line and run up the phone bill to hear bad promos! More or less all we have here is random power matches as five guys in this match are power guys, and no one saw anything wrong with this.
Also, no one saw a problem with putting THE FREAKING LOD AND SID together as a three man team against two good wrestlers and a generic power guy in Anvil, and yet they had the NERVE to wonder why they were having their heads handed to them. Anvil was a political science major at UCLA. All of a sudden my future seems far more bleak. Seriously, who in the WORLD thought Anvil vs. Hawk was a good idea?
You have two guys that have made a career out of not getting hurt. Just as I type that, Hawk takes a piledriver and of course is up before anyone else. Owen comes in and goes insane. Dang how good could he have been as a veteran? Imagine him vs. Angle or Jericho in 2000-2001. Owen would have been in his late 30s then and definitely capable of working well. He’s two and a half months older than Shawn, so it’s completely realistic that he could still be wrestling and having very good matches today.
He EASILY would have won the world title in there somewhere given the absolute awfulness of some of the champions since then. I mean seriously, who would have been better as champion: Owen or Khali? Anyway, this match is just BAD. Yeah, the match ends and I’ve got nothing at all. Owen wins with a top rope sunset flip. Sid would be gone either the next night or in 8 days.
Rating: F. Seriously, WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA??? This fails for reasons that I’ve already given. Owen and Animal were ok, but that’s it. This was just pathetic.
Since we’ve covered the Canadian Stampede match so many times in this series, here’s an elimination match at Survivor Series 1997.
Team USA vs. Team Canada
Vader, Steve Blackman, Marc Mero, Goldust
British Bulldog, Jim Neidhart, Doug Furnas, Phillip Lafon
If this is the best America can do, I need to learn to speak Canadian. Team America comes out to Angle’s music. Naturally the Americans are booed out of the building. The Canadians come out to Bret’s music to make sure the idea is hammered home. Furnas is from Oklahoma and Neidhart is from Nevada, but he had dual citizenship so it’s not as insane. I think Furnas has the long hair but I can never remember which is which.
Mero, wearing a hat, starts with Bulldog. Mero takes off the hat and Bulldog wipes himself with it, making him a hero in America. Bulldog knocks Mero to the floor and makes fun of Blackman’s martial arts in a funny bit. Vader comes in sans tag and works on Smith’s arm but jumps into a slam. Bulldog EASILY suplexes Vader and it’s off to Lafon. I was right about Furnas having the long hair. Good to know.
Back to Mero who hits a knee lift but gets his head kicked off by Lafon, followed by a clothesline for two. Off to Neidhart and then right back to Lafon. Blackman comes in and JR points out that Steve isn’t a wrestler. Lafon DDTs him for two and gets a crucifix for the same. Blackman fights off Team Canada on his own but gets caught on the floor in a fight with Furnas and Lafon, resulting in a countout elimination.
It’s Mero vs. Neidhart now with Jim missing a middle rope splash. Vader comes in and is immediately knocked down twice by Neidhart. Vader comes back with the running body attack and a splash for the pin. Lafon comes in again with some kicks to send Vader to the floor. Back in and Lafon is sent rolling to the corner and a big belly to belly puts him down. A middle rope splash is enough to put Lafon out, leaving Bulldog and Furnas vs. Vader, Mero and Goldust.
Furnas comes in to pound away but misses a dropkick, allowing the tag in to Mero. Has Goldie been in there yet? Mero pounds Furnas down and goes up for a moonsault press and it looks AWFUL, with Furnas going down like he was trying to powerslam Mero out of the air but Mero hitting the move like usual. Either way it gets two and it’s off to Bulldog because Furnas doesn’t seem to be sure what planet he’s on.
Mero escapes the Bulldog powerslam and blasts Smith with a right hand. Back to Furnas who fires off the rights and lefts. Furnas does the exact same thing, but Mero is a legitimate former amateur boxing champion so that’s not really a fair contest. Mero tries a rollup but gets reversed into one by Furnas who grabs a handful of tights to get us down to 2-2.
Vader pounds on Furnas as the King laments Sable having to leave with Mero. Furnas clotheslines Vader down and it’s off to Bulldog again. Goldust, who apparently has a broken hand, STILL doesn’t want to come in. Vader suplexes Furnas down but Furnas hits Vader low. When Vader gets another break from Bulldog, Goldie hides on the floor from a tag. Furnas suplexes Vader down but doesn’t tag. A Frankensteiner takes Vader down for two but Vader no sells it.
Vader slugs Goldust in the face and pulls him into the ring. This is when Goldust walked out on Marlena when she was pregnant because he didn’t want the responsibility or the lack of attention. Goldust walks out for a countout but Vader slams Furnas down and hits the Vader Bomb for the elimination. Vader turns around and is knocked silly with the ring bell from Bulldog for the final elimination.
Rating: C-. This was a better match by miles and miles than the first two, mainly due to people with actual talent being in there. On top of that, the people CARED about the match and it makes the match a lot better by result. The result was never in doubt given how worthless Team America was, but it was cool to see Vader getting to be like his old self, even for one night. The match still wasn’t great but after the first two matches tonight, this was a masterpiece by comparison.
Due to what happened later in the night, Neidhart would head over to WCW for a bit. Here he is on Nitro, March 30, 1998.
Curt Hennig vs. Jim Neidhart
Can this feud just end already? Rude jumps in on commentary and dodges a question about being Nash’s partner tonight. Neidhart quickly pulls him to the floor and sends Hennig into the barricade before going back inside. Jim keeps asking Rude to come down to the ring for a beating but pounds Hennig down with ease. Hennig gets in some shots but Neidhart rakes him in the eyes to put him down. Off to a bearhug on Curt and Rude runs in for the DQ, only to get caught in a quick bearhug as well.
Here’s a title match on Thunder, June 18, 1998.
IWGP Tag Titles: Tenzan/Masahiro Chono vs. British Bulldog/Jim Neidhart
The champions jump the brothers in law to start and throw Neidhart out to the floor. Smith gets double teamed but comes back with a nice double clothesline to put the champions down. Things settle down with Chono going after Neidhart’s knee to get us going. Some hard kicks to the knee and a quick leg lock take the Anvil down and it’s off to Tenzan for some solid right hands to the head. So much for the technical stuff.
Chono comes back in and goes after Davey, allowing the champions to double team Neidhart a bit. Jim comes back with a hard forearm to Chono and makes the hot tag to bulldog. House is cleaned and the powerslam puts Tenzan down, but Chono hits Davey with the belt for the DQ.
Rating: D+. Somehow this quick, nothing match is probably the best thing we’ve seen so far tonight. The titles being on the line made this a bit better than Monday’s match, but it doesn’t make the fans care about the Japanese guys at all. Granted no one cared about Neidhart and Bulldog at this point either, so it’s not Chono and Tenzan’s fault.
One of Neidhart’s few WCW PPV matches, from Fall Brawl 1998.
Rating: D+. Just a tag match here but it had Jim Neidhart in it in 1998. Again, I don’t think that requires much more of an explanation. The announcers were bored with it because this belonged on WCW Saturday Night or something like that. Not a fan of this one at all but it wasn’t horrible I guess.
I’m going to cut it there so we don’t have to go through Heroes of Wrestling anymore. Jim Neidhart was fine for a power guy with a cool beard and an awesome laugh. He never was much more than that but his time with Bret caused one of the best tag teams you’ll ever find. Neidhart is fondly remembered because of his time in a tag team and there’s nothing wrong with that.
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Summerslam Count-Up – 1990: Now This Is A Tag Match
Summerslam 1990 Date: August 27, 1990
Location: Philadelphia Spectrum, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 19,304
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Roddy Piper
This is a personal favorite of mine as I’ve probably seen this show upwards of 40 times. It was the first tape I ever owned and I went through at least two copies. We have a double main event tonight with Hogan returning to face Earthquake and Ultimate Warrior defending the world title against Rick Rude in a cage for the final blowoff in their rivalry. Let’s get to it.
We open with a look at the fans coming into the arena and buying merchandise.
Now we get a traditional intro with Vince shouting about the double main event.
Rockers vs. Power and Glory
Power and Glory (Hercules and Paul Roma) get a jobber entrance. The camera immediately goes wide during the opening brawl so you don’t see Shawn’s knee get grazed by Hercules’ chain. His knee was REALLY badly hurt at this time so he’s just here for an appearance, making this a handicap match for all intents and purposes. Marty hits a quick dropkick to both guys and gets a small package on Roma but Slick has the referee.
Vince is freaking out over the referee missing stuff as Marty clotheslines Herc to the outside. We officially start with Roma vs. Jannetty and Roma tagging his way out of a sunset flip. Shawn is still on the floor as Hercules pounds away and slams Marty down. Roma plants Jannetty with a backbreaker for two but Marty comes back with a powerslam. The top rope fist connects with Paul’s head but Hercules breaks up the pin. Roma sends Jannetty into a clothesline from Herc as Shawn is screaming in pain. The superplex/top rope splash combo is enough to finish the massacre of Jannetty.
Rating: C-. The match wasn’t too bad all things considered. The crowd is white hot here and they carried the match to a higher level than it could have reached on their own. It’s kind of a shame that Marty had to be Shawn’s partner as his own skills were overlooked by his far more talented partner.
Post match Shawn finally gets into the ring but Marty covers his injured leg and takes a beating himself. Shawn is taken out on a stretcher.
Mr. Perfect isn’t worried about the Texas Tornado because he’s perfect. Tornado had been around for only a few weeks if even that coming into this. Heenan says Texas Tornadoes never do any damage because you can see it coming from a mile away.
Texas Tornado says that Perfect doesn’t know anything about Texas Tornadoes. They’re powerful and devastating, and tonight he’s going to go back into the clouds with the Intercontinental Title. I’ve always liked this promo: it’s short, it’s to the point, and it ties into the character name. Short and sweet. Note that Tornado is wearing yellow trunks here, just like Perfect. He’d change to white for the match
Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Texas Tornado
Tornado launches him into the corner to start and Perfect has a breather on the floor. The idea is that Perfect hasn’t had time to plan for Tornado and doesn’t know how to deal with him. Back in and Perfect hooks a quick hiptoss but Tornado slams him down and clotheslines Perfect out to the floor.
Back in and Perfect hits a clothesline of his own and the necksnap has Tornado in trouble. Off to a sleeper on Tornado but he quickly makes the rope. Perfect tries slapping him in the face, but Tornado pulls him into a slingshot, sending Perfect head first into the post. The Claw hold and Tornado Punch are enough for the pin and the title.
Rating: D+. This is a weird one as it’s about three and a half minutes of stalling before the fast ending. This was supposed to be Brutus Beefcake’s shot but he injured his face in a parasailing accident and Tornado was here as a surprise, which is likely why they went with the title change. Perfect would get the title back a few weeks later.
Mean Gene is talking about Sapphire being nowhere in sight (remember that as it becomes important later) when Hennig and Brain come in and say Tornado cheated by sending Perfect into the post. Heenan swears, yes SWEARS I SAY, that the shoulder was up at two.
Sapphire vs. Sensational Sherri
Sherri has on something like a big Mardi Gras mask which terrified me as a kid. Not that it matters as there’s no Sapphire. The music plays again but there’s still no Sapphire. Sherri says count to ten and then ring the bell. There’s still no Sapphire so Sherri wins by forfeit.
Dusty Rhodes isn’t sure where Sapphire, his chick, is. The idea is that Sapphire has been getting a bunch of gifts and no one knows who is sending them. The benefactor is scheduled to be revealed tonight. In what can only be described as a bizarre and random cameo, Jim Duggan pops up, says he hasn’t seen Sapphire either, and walks away. Dusty lists off the gifts (ring, bracelet, fur coat, Cadillac etc) and that’s about it.
Warlord vs. Tito Santana
Piper makes Mexican jokes as Tito grabs a headlock. Warlord easily shoves him down and Piper suggests going for a taco. Three straight dropkicks send Warlord out to the floor for a consultation with Slick. Back in and Tito pounds away but is launched to the outside on a kickout. Warlord rams Tito’s back into the post as Piper does a horrible Slick impression. Back in and Warlord pounds on the back but Tito fires off a quick clothesline and right hands. The flying forearm hits out of nowhere but Warlord gets his foot on the ropes. Back up a few seconds later and a powerslam abruptly ends Tito.
Rating: D+. Tito was a jobber to the stars at this point and made Warlord look as good as he could have, but the match was nothing special at all. Warlord just wasn’t all that good other than having muscles on top of muscles. Tito also jobbed to Barbarian at Wrestlemania so they had an idea of what they were using him for at this time.
Ad for Survivor Series. That show SUCKED.
Demolition says it’s going to be a surprise combination of them facing the Hart Foundation for the titles. Sean Mooney asks them about a match with Legion of Doom, giving us this joke from Crush: “They’re just a couple of second rate imposters.” It’s funny if you know your history.
Demolition has their entrance and it’s Smash/Crush. The Hart Foundation says they don’t care which combination they were going to face.
Tag Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Demolition
This is 2/3 falls and Demolition is defending. Basically the Harts have about as much chance coming into this as I have at being Miss America 1974. Bret starts with Smash but the Harts knock Crush to the floor before anything gets going. Things settle down and Bret gets a quick rollup for two. Anvil comes in to crank on Smash’s arm before Bret comes back in with a fist to the back. Smash tries to get into a technical match with Bret and gets caught in an armbar for his stupidity.
Smash finally slams Bret down and brings in Crush, only to have Bret avoid an elbow and pound away. Crush charges into a boot in the corner and gets rolled up for two before it’s off to Neidhart vs. Smash, only to have Crush kick Jim in the back to give the champions the advantage. Crush comes in again and misses a charge into the corner, allowing for another double tag to Bret and Smash. Neidhart falls to the floor as everything breaks down. Smash is whipped into Crush and Bret gets two off the middle rope elbow but here’s Crush again. The Decapitator to Bret is enough for the first fall.
The second fall begins with Crush hitting a hard clothesline on Bret and Smash pounding on the chest. After a quick neck crank by Crush, Bret fires off the Hart Attack clothesline on Smash, allowing for the hot tag to Neidhart. A powerslam gets two on Smash and Bret launches Anvil into Smash in the corner. The Hart Attack takes Smash down but Crush breaks up the pin for the DQ to make it 1-1. Why they didn’t let the Harts get the pin there is beyond me.
During the break between falls, Demolition knocks Bret to the floor, allowing Ax to run down and sneak under the ring. The third fall starts with Bret getting two off a sunset flip before taking Smash down by the leg. Neidhart picks Bret up for the reverse powerslam for two on Smash. Now things get tricky as Smash rolls to the floor and rolls under the ring, switching places with Ax.
The idea is that Ax and Smash look so much alike that the referee can’t tell them apart. This is fine except for one problem: THEY DON’T LOOK ALIKE! Ax is taller, heavier set and has a rounder head, not to mention a deeper voice. This reasoning never made sense to me as a kid and it still doesn’t to this day.
Anyway the fresh Ax destroys Bret and gets two off Bret’s chest bump in the corner. Anvil comes in sans tag as Smash takes Ax’s place again. They try to switch again and the Legion of Doom come out to break it up. Smash goes after Hawk and Animal as Anvil shoulder blocks Crush into a rollup by Bret for the pin and the titles. The place comes unglued as the Harts have shocked the world.
Rating: B. That’s probably a bit high but I love this match. The wrestling is just ok but the storytelling is as good as you’ll get in a tag match with the LOD coming out to even things up, allowing the Harts to finally do the impossible and win the titles. This is a popular match among old school fans and if you watch it you’ll see why.
Wrestlemania VII ad, with Vince promising over 100,000 fans. “Terror threats” prevented this from happening, which is WWF speak for “the Los Angeles Coliseum would have been half empty so we’ll move it to an arena.”
The LOD goes on a big rant about how they’re the real thing and Demolition is living in their world. The Harts come in and say they’ll fight anyone anytime.
Demolition wants to get their hands on the LOD.
Sherri has hear rumors about Sapphire and thinks she might be a UFO and not that stupid. It’s a rather strange interview and we’ll leave it at that. Basically Sapphire has done something that Sherri thinks is smart.
Nikolai Volkoff and Jim Duggan are proud to be international tag team partners. We’re in intermission if that wasn’t clear.
Earthquake and Dino Bravo brag about putting Hogan on the shelf. Big Bossman, Hogan’s friend of the month, will be no problem for Dino. Jimmy Hart says Bossman and Hogan will leave on side by side stretchers.
Jake Roberts says he isn’t afraid of Bad News Brown’s sewer rats. The snake keeps wrapping around Jake’s throat in a creepy visual.
Jake Roberts vs. Bad News Brown
Big Bossman is guest referee for no apparent reason. Brown jumps Jake before Bossman is in the ring but has to bail out of a DDT attempt. Back in and Bad News tosses Jake down and gets two off a legdrop. Jake tries the DDT a second time but Brown bails to the floor again. Roberts follows him out and gets hit in the ribs with a chair which isn’t a DQ for some reason. Back in and Bad News pounds away as Piper asks if Vince has ever smelled Brown. Jake avoids a middle rope elbow and hits the short clothesline but Brown backdrops out of the DDT. Another chair shot to Jake is good for the lame DQ.
Rating: D+. This didn’t have time to go anywhere and I’m still not sure why Boss Man was in here at all. Jake and Brown didn’t do anything else after this and Brown didn’t go after Boss Man after the feud, so I guess he was there as an enforcer for reasons not important enough to explain. The match was just ok.
Brown tries to drop a leg on the snake but Bossman makes the save. Bad News beats him down as well but Jake pulls the snake out of the bag to chase Brown off. This was Brown’s last major appearance in mainstream wrestling.
Demolition yells a lot.
Time for the Brother Love Show with a REAL American as his special guest: Sgt. Slaughter. This would be the start of his heel turn as he didn’t like the idea of Nikolai Volkoff becoming an American and wants America to be how he liked it. Slaughter gives Love the Great American Award and declares WAR on Volkoff, while also saying that Sadaam Hussein would destroy America in a real war. Somehow this took nearly ten minutes.
Mr. Fuji says his Orient Express will leave big red marks on Volkoff’s head.
Gene sees Sapphire go into a dressing room and lock the door behind her.
Orient Express vs. Nikolai Volkoff/Jim Duggan
Duggan and Volkoff sing God Bless America and get jumped in a twist on the old foreigners’ gimmick. We start with the small Tanaka trying to match strength with Volkoff. Vince: “That wasn’t too bright.” Piper: “Yep, real dumb.” You can’t make it any simpler than that. Sato kicks away at Volkoff a bit but it’s hot tag to Duggan who cleans house and finishes Tanaka with the three point clothesline. This was nearly a squash.
Sapphire won’t open the door for Dusty but Rhodes swears he’ll figure this out tonight one way or another.
Macho King Randy Savage doesn’t care about Rhodes being out there alone and says he understands Sapphire’s decision to leave a common man. I’m a big Savage fan and the energy he puts into his promos always impresses me. He’s got NOTHING to talk about here and he was going nuts anyway.
Dusty Rhodes vs. Randy Savage
Before the match we hear a familiar laugh and cut to Ted DiBiase on the interview platform. He’s been spending the last several weeks telling Dusty that he has a price just like everyone else but Dusty has kept turning him down. Tonight, someone else had a price: Sapphire, Ted’s latest purchase. Ted’s latest gift to her is a bag of money which is hard to pass up. DiBiase brings up the most obvious point to the story: who else could afford to pay for all the gifts Sapphire has been getting?
Rhodes charges at DiBiase but Savage jumps him from behind to start the match. Back in and Savage hits a top rope ax handle for two. Dusty comes back with some elbows but his heart isn’t in this. He has to stop to chase Sherri though, allowing Savage to knock Rhodes out cold with Sherri’s loaded purse for the pin. This was nothing.
DiBiase leaves his suite but bails with Virgil and Sapphire as Dusty arrives. This would start a long feud which would include the debuts of Undertaker and Dustin Rhodes and Virgil’s face turn.
Hogan says that he can’t tell a lie because he’s like George Washington. He loved his Hulkamaniacs for supporting him and remembers Tugboat for leading the charge until Earthquake and Bravo beat him down. Bossman says that Quake and Bravo have the Constitutional right to a beating tonight.
Hulk Hogan vs. Earthquake
This is Hogan’s big return after being gone all summer due to an attack by Earthquake which broke his ribs. They lock up but Hogan can’t shove the big man around. Now Quake shoves him down a few times as Jimmy is losing his mind. Quake shoulders him out to the floor and Hogan takes a breather with Bossman. Back in and Hogan tries pounding away but Quake sends him into the corner to take him back down. Hogan gets a boot up in the corner and nails some clotheslines but Quake won’t go down.
After knocking Bravo and Hart off the apron, Hogan finally drops Earthquake with the big windup punch. All four guys get inside and the heels both take big boots to the face. The referee puts Bossman out though, allowing Bravo and Quake to hit a double slam on Hogan. A big elbow drop keeps Hogan down and a top rope forearm (from the 468lb Earthquake) to the back has Hogan down again. Off to a Boston Crab but Hogan tries to push his way out. That doesn’t work so Hogan looks to his left and realizes he’s about four inches from the rope for the break.
Bravo gets in some cheap shots on the floor but Earthquake misses an elbow drop back inside. Hogan finally gets to his feet (sidenote: Roddy Piper should not be allowed to cheer for Hogan. Ever.) but falls back down on a slam attempt. Off to a bearhug by Earthquake as the match slows down. Hulk punches out of it and tries a cross body like a schnook, earning the powerslam he gets as a result. Earthquake drops a pair of Earthquake splashes (seated sentons) but Hogan gets up at two to shock the crowd.
It’s Hulk Up time and there’s the slam but Dino distracts the referee after the legdrop. Jimmy comes in but gets tossed at Earthquake, sending everyone to the floor. Hart accidentally hits Quake with the Megaphone and Hogan slams the big man onto a table (it’s in Philadelphia after all)….for a countout? For the life of me I have no idea why Hogan didn’t get a pin here. I guess they wanted to save that for house shows, but it’s not like people wouldn’t want to see Hogan do it again live.
Rating: B-. The match itself was nothing of note but this is exactly what the fans wanted to see other than Hogan getting a pin. These two feuded on the house show circuit for the next four months or so, which really is amazing when you consider how basic the angle was that set it up. This falls into the fun category which is fine for a show like this.
Post match Quake chokes Hogan until Bossman blasts him in the back with a STEPLADDER. Quake finally drops him and looks at Bossman so the cop pulls out the nightstick to chase them off. Lots of posing ensues as you can see the house show rematches with any combination of these four guys being made up.
We go to the back where Rude and Heenan talk about Rocky Balboa facing Apollo Creed. Rude has beaten him before and he’ll do it again because a cage is his kind of match. Heenan says there will be no sequels either.
Dusty goes on a rant about being in a storm with only America being able to offer him shelter. He doesn’t have a price for Ted DiBiase and he’s coming for the Million Dollar Man. The feud would have been better if Sapphire hadn’t disappeared after this show.
Lord Alfred Hayes talks about the cage being constructed and how it’s put together. It’s more interesting than it sounds.
Hogan brags about winning and says there’s a fourth demandment: believe in yourself. He wants the world title back and will beat Earthquake as many times as it takes to be #1 contender again.
Vince and Roddy talk about Hogan vs. Earthquake happening again.
Earthquake, Hart and Bravo say the war isn’t over for Hogan and Bossman.
The Warrior rants about Rick Rude being cracked like the Liberty Bell. He says he’ll win and quotes some historic documents to continue the Philadelphia theme.
WWF World Title: Ultimate Warrior vs. Rick Rude
In a cage where you can win by pin or escape. Rude tries to block Warrior from getting into the cage so Warrior knocks him off the top and down into the ring. The champion finally comes in with a top rope ax handle smash and throws Rude into the cage. Rick goes into the cage a few more times but ducks a charge to send Warrior face first into the bars. Rude kicks Warrior away but jumps off the top to put him down again instead of climbing out.
A hard slam into the cage has Warrior down but Rude still won’t try to climb out. Rude tries the Rude Awakening after winning a quick slugout but Warrior easily breaks the hold with raw power. They clothesline each other down before Rude hits a quick Rude Awakening for no cover. Instead Rude goes up to the top of the cage for a right hand to Warrior’s head. Heenan is losing his mind trying to get Rude to cover but Rude goes up the cage again.
This time Rude jumps into a right hand to the ribs but Heenan slams the door on Warrior’s head as he goes to escape. After the two count both guys collide and they’re down again as the match drags some more. Warrior stops him from crawling out while pulling Rude’s trunks down in the process. Heenan is pulled in and whipped into the steel before being sent outside again. The champion Warriors Up and hits the gorilla press before climbing out to retain.
Rating: D. This match sucked and the ending was exactly what people expected. These two had a match on SNME a month earlier and maybe Rude should have taken the title there to give it back to Warrior here. There was nothing of interest here and Warrior never seemed to be in any real danger due to Rude not going for a cover or trying to escape.
Overall Rating: C+. This is a show where the individual parts don’t reflect how the whole show comes out. This is a turn your brain off and have fun show. The main events were exactly what the fans wanted and the other stuff is fun as well. There was a show long angle with Dusty which set up another feud on top of all that. It’s a good example of how not everything needs to be a huge show that changes everything and that’s a good lesson for modern WWE to learn.
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Summerslam Count-Up – 1988: The Last of the Brilliant Minds
We’re finally at the final of the Big Four WWE shows with Summerslam. Back in 1987, it was clear that pay per view was a big deal for the company, so Survivor Series was added to the schedule. That show was a huge success as well, so why not add a third pay per view on top of it? The new show was Summerslam which made its debut in 1988. The show was coming off the very successful Wrestlemania IV with Randy Savage as the WWF Champion, meaning the company was firing on all cylinders. Over the next 26 days I’ll be counting down the shows leading up to the 2014 edition, including a brand new 2013 review. Let’s get to it.
Summerslam 1988 Date: August 29, 1988
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 20,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Billy Graham
The main event here is Hogan/Savage vs. DiBiase/Andre in a match billed as Mega Powers vs. Mega Bucks. Allegedly the plan was to have Ric Flair jump from the NWA and challenge Savage for the title but Flair backed out, giving us the tag match instead. Other than that we have Honky Tonk Man defending his title against a mystery opponent and the Hart Foundation challenging Demolition for the tag titles. The card wasn’t exactly stacked for this show. Let’s get to it.
The opening video has what would become the Royal Rumble theme song set over shots of the four guys in the main event plus their managers, Virgil and Miss Elizabeth.
Fabulous Rougeaus vs. British Bulldogs
These two teams could not stand each other behind the scenes, eventually reaching the point where the Bulldogs left the company as a result. Davey jumps Jacques to start and rams him into turnbuckle after turnbuckle to put him down. Smith throws Jacques over to Raymond for a tag in a nice display of bravado. Off to Dynamite for a quick headbutt and a slam to keep Raymond in trouble.
Off to an armbar by Dynamite Kid before Davey comes back in for one of his own. Dynamite comes back in with a wicked clothesline to take Raymond’s head off. Chris Benoit idolized Dynamite and you can see so many of Benoit’s moves when you watch Dynamite’s matches. Davey comes in and trades some snappy rollups before it’s back to Dynamite to continue cranking on the arm.
Davey comes in again but Jacques trips him up to shift control to the Canadians. It’s off to some leg work now as Jacques kicks away at Davey’s hamstring. The Rougeaus start tagging in and out with Ray coming in to drop some knees on the hamstring before Jacques comes back in to pull on the leg. Ray comes back in sans tag to pull on the leg before Jacques puts on a spinning toehold. Davey finally gets back up and monkey flips Ray down, allowing for the tag to Dynamite.
The Kid speeds things way up and sends Ray out to the floor, triggering a brawl between Davey and Raymond. Back inside and Davey hits the powerslam but Jacques breaks it up before a one count. Dynamite comes back in for the headbutt but Jacques drills him with a belly to back suplex for two. Off to an abdominal stretch by Jacques followed by a camel clutch from both Rougeaus. Kid fights up and rams Ray into the buckle to escape but it’s right back to the abdominal stretch by Jacques.
Dynamite finally fights up again and headbutts Jacques down to bring in Davey. Jacques immediately grabs the rope to avoid a dropkick but gets caught in a gorilla press onto the top rope. Everything breaks down and Davey picks up Dynamite to launch him into a headbutt on Jacques, but the time limit expires before there can be a cover.
Rating: C+. This was a solid opener as the fans were staying hot throughout the extended rest holds. The parts with both teams brawling and getting to move around made for a much better match, but you can’t do that for twenty minutes when you’re going for the draw. Draws were much more commonplace back in the 80s so this was nothing that odd to see.
We see Ron Bass attacking Brutus Beefcake and busting him open with a spur. The big red X saying CENSORED which doesn’t actually cover the cut on Brutus’ head is hilarious. Brutus won’t be able to challenge Honky Tonk Man for the Intercontinental Title tonight but there’s an unnamed replacement.
Bad News Brown vs. Ken Patera
Patera is a former Olympic weightlifter who has seen far better days. Bad News is a former Olympian as well, having won a bronze medal in Judo. Brown goes right after Patera during Ken’s entrance and drops a quick elbow for no cover. Patera comes back with a clothesline and takes his jacket off to really get things going. A back elbow puts Bad News down but an elbow drop misses. Brown stomps away on the apron as we’re firmly in punch and kick mode here.
Patera blocks a backdrop with a kick to the chest and gets two off a bad backbreaker. Off to a bearhug by Patera but Brown pokes him in the eye to escape. Patera can’t get his full nelson on in either attempt at the hold so he botches a charge into the corner instead, hitting the post shoulder first. The Ghetto Blaster (enziguri) is enough for the pin by Brown.
Rating: F. Patera was terrible by this point, not even being able to run into Brown’s elbow in the corner properly. Even the announcers were suggesting that he retire at this point, which I believe he did soon after. This match was nothing more than punching and kicking which doesn’t make for a very entertaining few minutes. It’s a product of the times on house shows that, which for all intents and purposes is what this show is: a big house show with a big main event.
Ad for a boxing PPV which had some kind of promotional deal with WWF.
The Mega Powers (Hogan/Savage/Liz) are hyped up for the main event and say that Liz is their secret weapon.
Rick Rude vs. Junkyard Dog
Just like in the previous match, the good guy is jumped during his entrance. This time though Rude is backdropped down and headbutted to the floor for a hug from Heenan. Back in and Dog misses a headbutt, allowing Rude to hit Dog with a top rope axhandle. Rude pounds away on the head as Graham shouts that it won’t work. Instead it’s off to a chinlock by Rick as the match slows way down.
Back up and Dog pounds away in the corner but stops to go after Heenan. A Russian legsweep puts Dog down, and Rude goes up top. Instead of immediately diving off though, Rude takes his own tights down to reveal another pair with Cheryl Roberts (as in Jake’s wife) on them. Jake charges in for the DQ as you would expect him to do.
Rating: D. The match sucked but it’s miles ahead of the previous match. If nothing else Dog had some great charisma and kept the crowd in it, as opposed to Patera who put the crowd to sleep seconds after the bell rang. The Dog was just a jobber at this point and would be in WCW by the end of the year.
The Dog is mad post match but nothing comes of it.
Honky Tonk Man, like the dolt that he is, doesn’t want to know the identity of his mystery opponent. He says he wants to be surprised.
Powers of Pain vs. Bolsheviks
The Powers (Barbarian and Warlord) are still faces here and have the Baron (Von Raschke) with them. Just like in the previous two matches the brawl is on as soon as the good guys hit the ring. The Powers double clothesline Boris Zhukov as Volkoff tries to sneak in for a cheap shot. Barbarian easily catches him coming in and sends him flying until we get down to Barbarian vs. Boris to start things off.
Boris puts his head down and…..something happens (it looked like a choke but it’s not really clear) before it’s off to Warlord for a gutwrench suplex on Zhukov. Both Russians double team Warlord but they can’t even get him down to his knees. Nikolai chokes away before Boris puts on a chinlock. The Russians have a double backdrop broken up and it’s off to Barbarian again. Everything breaks down and it’s a double shoulder followed by a swan dive to Boris for the pin.
Rating: D. Another lame match here but the Powers looked decent. The Baron would be gone in a few weeks as the company wasn’t pleased that a dark character was getting cheered, so they turned Demolition and their evil S&M looking gear face instead. Also did the Russians ever actually win a major match?
Ad for Survivor Series.
Here’s the Brother Love Show with a bell ringing to start it for some reason. After a minute or two of talking about love, he introduces his guest: Hacksaw Jim Duggan. Duggan says that he loves the country and that Love is a fake. Love thinks that Dino Bravo knows the meaning of love and loves his country (Canada), but Duggan says that the people of Canada don’t respect Bravo. Duggan says this isn’t Sunday school and he’ll police this company if need be. Love says he doesn’t see a badge on Duggan, but Jim says his 2×4 will do just fine. Duggan gives him a five count to leave and Love is gone at four. This was pointless.
Same boxing ad as earlier.
Intercontinental Title: Honky Tonk Man vs. ???
Honky says to get him someone out here to wrestle and he doesn’t care who it is. After a few seconds, the Ultimate Warrior charges to the ring, pounds Honky with right hands, hits a shoulder block and splashes him for the pin and the title in thirty seconds. The crowd ERUPTS, as this is what they’ve been waiting over a year to see.
So why was this so awesome? This was one of the most perfectly told stories the WWF ever produced and they nailed it every step of the way. Back in 1987, Ricky Steamboat was Intercontinental Champion but wanted to take some time off. The solution was to put the title on the comedic newcomer the Honky Tonk Man, who cheated to win the belt. Honky viewed as a total joke as champion due to his lack of skill and his gimmick of a wrestling Elvis impersonator.
The fans looked at him as someone who would lose the title the first time he defended it against someone far more competent than he was so it wasn’t that big of a deal. This is where Vince had the fans: what if Honky just didn’t lose the title? If there is one thing pure fans hate, it’s seeing a guy who doesn’t deserve a title holding onto it against people they like. Honky did this for the next 18 months by coming up with every way imaginable to cheat, ranging from getting counted out, disqualified, having Jimmy Hart interfere, walking out of matches and all points in between.
Honky continued to hold the title against far better talent, such as Jim Duggan, Randy Savage, Jake Roberts, Ricky Steamboat and Brutus Beefcake, with the idea being “he has to lose eventually.” All of a sudden, Honky was one of the biggest draws around because people would pay their money to see him get beaten up, thinking that the lucky streak couldn’t go on much longer. Well the streak DID keep going, stretching into the longest title reign in the history of the belt which still stands to this day and will likely never be broken.
This is why having Warrior out there was so brilliant. Warrior was the last guy on earth that you would expect to pull off something clever, but he did what everyone else had overlooked: he didn’t bother trying to outsmart Honky, but instead just ran over him and beat him in thirty seconds. This is EXACTLY what the fans had wanted to see for over a year and they got it to perfection. That’s the kind of storytelling that you never get anymore which is a shame.
Regis Philbin is here.
Survivor Series is coming, so here’s a four minute highlight reel from last year’s show. This must be intermission.
Sugar Ray Leonard, one of the boxers in the advertised show, thanks Vince for promoting his fight.
Video on Leonard and his opponent in the fight Donny Lelonde.
Lelonde talks a bit as well.
Leonard says he’ll win.
We see the intro video from the beginning of the show again.
Bobby Heenan comes up to the announcers’ booth and says that DiBiase is counting his money while Andre reads the Wall Street Journal. The Mega Powers are currently cowering in their locker room.
Dino Bravo vs. Don Muraco
These two fought at Wrestlemania earlier in the year as well. This is power vs. power so they shove each other around to start. Some armdrags put Bravo on the floor before heading back in for a hiptoss. Off to an armbar by Muraco but Bravo comes back with an atomic drop to take over. A Russian legsweep puts Bravo down but Muraco has to go after Bravo’s manager Frenchy Martin. The referee gets kicked but nothing comes of it, allowing Bravo to hit his side slam for the pin.
Rating: D-. Somehow that match ran five and a half minutes. Muraco would also be gone soon before the end of the year and it’s not hard to see why. He was nowhere near as bad as Patera earlier but it was clear that his best days were behind him. Bravo would become Earthquake’s lackey soon after this and have the most productive time of his career.
Another Survivor Series ad.
Jesse Ventura says that he’s going to be impartial as the guest referee in the main event despite taking money from DiBiase.
Tag Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Demolition
Demolition is defending and the Harts don’t even get an entrance. The champions have Mr. Fuji and the Harts’ former manager Jimmy Hart with them. Bret and Ax start things off with Ax pounding Hitman down like he’s nothing. Bret avoids an elbow drop and it’s off to Anvil (Jim Neidhart) vs. Smash with Neidhart taking over. Ax hits a knee to Jim’s back from the apron and the champions take over again.
Neidhart gets in a punch to Ax’s face and it’s off to Hart vs. Smash again. Smash will have nothing to do with this selling stuff and whips Bret shoulder first into the post as the champions get their first extended advantage. Bret’s bad arm is caught up in the ropes and both champs pound away on the injured limb. Smash bends Bret’s arm around his own leg Off to Ax for more cranking on the arm. Bret is shockingly not selling it all that well.
Smash sends the arm into the post again and Bret is in big trouble on the outside. Back in and Ax pounds away while Graham is SCREAMING at Anvil to do something. Bret comes back with a clothesline with the injured arm but the referee misses the tag. Smash charges into a knee in the corner and now the referee sees the tag. Anvil comes in and cleans house, even slingshotting over the top onto Smash on the floor. Back in and Bret throws Anvil into Smash in the corner for two before everything breaks down. Neidhart goes after Fuji, allowing Ax to hit Bret in the back with the megaphone to retain.
Rating: B-. This took some time to get going but once Bret got in and started selling, it was all awesome. Demolition would hold the titles for nearly another year in the longest tag title reign in company history. These teams would go at it again in two years in one of the most entertaining tag matches ever. This was good stuff, but they were capable of much better.
Boxing ad.
Honky is going NUTS in the back, ranting about how this isn’t fair.
Big Boss Man vs. Koko B. Ware
Boss Man is brand new here. This wasn’t included on the home video version for reasons that I’ve never figured out. It was probably a time thing though. Koko fires away to start and staggers the very fat Boss Man with a dropkick. Boss Man is one of the best cases of weight loss you’ll ever see as he lost probably 100lbs in a year and a half, making him MUCH smoother in the ring.
Koko charges into a front facelock and Boss Man pounds him down with a forearm to the back. A splash in the corner crushes Ware but Boss Man pulls him up at two. Off to a surfboard hold but Koko rolls forward and kicks Boss Man in the face. A stiff right hand puts Koko down again but Boss Man misses a top rope splash. Boss Man misses another splash in the corner and a missile dropkick gets two for Koko. Ware charges again but gets dropped face first onto the post, followed by the Boss Man Slam for the easy pin.
Rating: D. This went WAY too long for a squash early on in Boss Man’s run with the company. The match wasn’t terrible and Koko looked good with the high flying stuff, but therein lies the problem: there’s no reason to have Koko look so good here. He should have gotten destroyed in about three minutes as opposed to being somewhat competitive in twice as long.
Boss Man hits Koko with the nightstick post match.
Survivor Series ad. Again.
Ultimate Warrior celebrates in the back and talks about it being like a comic book tonight. He’ll be on the next spaceship to Parts Unknown.
Jake Roberts vs. Hercules
Jake goes for the snake but it’s merely a ploy to get in some quick right hands. A knee lift puts Herc down but Jake can’t hook the DDT. Instead it’s a headlock and Hercules can’t even break it with a belly to back suplex. Herc escapes and drops some elbows for no cover. Off to a chinlock on the Snake as Graham says you can use this to talk to your opponent. In non-announcer speak: it’s a nice way to call spots. A lot of spots could be called here as Herc keeps the hold on for well over a minute.
Jake finally fights up and tries a hammerlock but gets elbowed in the face for his efforts. Roberts pulls Herc from the apron to the floor, only to have his neck snapped across the top rope as Hercules comes back in. We hit the chinlock again but Jake immediately jawbreaks his way out of it. The short clothesline looks to set up the DDT but Hercules backdrops out of it. Herc drops an elbow for two but Jake slips out of a slam and knocks Hercules out lukewarm with the DDT for the pin.
Rating: C-. The match was nothing special but it certainly wasn’t bad. The DDT looked great and the fans went nuts for it so you can’t say they didn’t get what they wanted. Hercules was fine for a role like this as he was strong enough to be a threat to anyone but rarely won anything. Decent little match here actually.
We recap the buildup to the main event. Andre seemed to be challenging Savage for a world title shot but DiBiase jumped Randy from behind, allowing Andre to choke Savage down. The Mega Bucks challenged Savage to a tag match which Savage accepted, saying that he would announce his partner later. If you didn’t know who that was from a mile away, you fail as a wrestling fan. Jesse Ventura, long time Hogan hater, is guest referee for no apparent reason. Andre intimidated Jesse and DiBiase paid Jesse off so the fix is in.
Mega Powers vs. Mega Bucks
Jesse sends all three managers (Virgil, Heenan and Liz) to the floor but not to the back. He also makes the teams change corners for no apparent reason. Savage gets to fight Andre to start but it’s quickly off to DiBiase. He wants Hogan and gets both Hulk and an atomic drop into a right hand from Savage. Hogan pounds DiBiase as well and it’s off to Savage for some double elbows. A top rope ax handle gets two for Savage off a slow count from Ventura.
Andre comes in to beat Hogan down but Jesse is with Liz. Now the Giant comes in legally and sits on Hogan’s chest a few times before putting on a nerve hold. With DiBiase coming in sans tag, Andre chokes away with his singlet. Ted comes in legally for a near fall off a clothesline before dropping those trademark fists of his. Off to a chinlock which Gorilla swears is a choke. Hogan finally elbows his way out of the hold but a double clothesline puts both guys down.
The hot tag brings in Savage to pound away on DiBiase with right hands and a backdrop. A top rope ax handle puts DiBiase down again but Ted rams him into the top turnbuckle to change momentum again. DiBiase clotheslines Savage down and it’s off to Giant again. Andre sits on Savage in the corner which is a lot more devastating than it sounds. Back to DiBiase who gets two off a suplex. Ted goes up for a middle rope elbow, but Savage uses all of his flying elbow experience and rolls away.
Hulk comes in again off the real hot tag and cleans house on both Mega Bucks but Savage jumps into Andre’s boot. Hogan puts DiBiase in a sleeper but Andre makes the save with some headbutts. The Mega Powers are down, but Liz gets on the apron and in the most famous part of the match, takes off her skirt to reveal a bikini bottom and some nice legs. The distraction lets the Mega Powers do their big handshake and Hulk Up as one. A top rope ax handle to Andre, a flying elbow and legdrop to DiBiase later and things are pretty much done. Jesse only counts two, so Savage has to shove his hand down for the three.
Rating: B-. Much like the original Wrestlemania main event, there isn’t much to see here but it’s a fun match. It gave the fans exactly what they wanted and the Liz bit was a big surprise as she NEVER did anything sexual up to that point and rarely did after. Hogan and Savage were obviously going to win, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t a fun moment and a decent main event.
Hogan lifts Liz (who remember is rather scantily clad here) onto Savage’s shoulder for the post match celebration. Savage gives him a look that says “Dude, NOT COOL!” You could see the seeds being planted even back then.
Overall Rating: D+. This is more of the start of a historical series than a good show itself. The only things people remember are Liz’s legs and a thirty second squash and it’s really not surprising. The rest of the show is a bunch of boring matches with nothing of note to them at all. It’s certainly not a terrible show as there are some good tag matches and some decent singles matches, but nothing on here is must see television and nothing is really significant. For a big house show though, not too bad.
Ratings Comparison
For each of the twenty five reviews, I’ll be posting a comparison of the original reviews to the redos as I always do. Summerslam was one of the first set of reviews I ever did so the original ratings are going to be very interesting.
British Bulldogs vs. Fabulous Rougeaus
Original: B
Redo: C+
Bad News Brown vs. Ken Patera
Original: D+
Redo: F
Rick Rude vs. Junkyard Dog
Original: D
Redo: D
Powers of Pain vs. Bolsheviks
Original: C+
Redo: D
Ultimate Warrior vs. Honky Tonk Man
Original: A+
Redo: N/A
Dino Bravo vs. Don Muraco
Original: B-
Redo: D-
Demolition vs. Hart Foundation
Original: B-
Redo: B-
Big Boss Man vs. Koko B. Ware
Original: D
Redo: D
Jake Roberts vs. Hercules
Original: C-
Redo: C-
Mega Powers vs. Mega Bucks
Original: B
Redo: B-
Overall Rating
Original: D+
Redo: D+
How could I have possibly liked Muraco vs. Bravo? There’s NOTHING there!
Today is a wrestling SUPERSTAR with Virgil. Hopefully he doesn’t charge me $20 for using his name.
Virgil got his start back in 1986 and was a jobber in the WWF in his rookie yere. Here he is on Wrestling Challenge, September 28, 1986.
Paul Orndorff vs. Lucius Brown
This is during the period where Orndorff came out to Real American. Feeling out process to start until Orndorff easily sends Brown to the floor. Back in and Orndorff hits him a few times before the piledriver gets an easy pin.
Virgil would become known as….uh Virgil, Ted DiBiase’s bodyguard. He would occasionally team with DiBiase, such as this match on January 25, 1988.
Hulk Hogan/Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Ted DiBiase/Virgil
This is from January of 88 in MSG. Andre is with the heels here. Virgil very rarely wrestled in this era so this was a rarity. Bigelow was the freaking man at this point so this is like the Superfriends teaming up. The heels jump them during the music as Heenan sits in on commentary. Double big boot puts DiBiase down as the bald brotherhood cleans house. Hogan and DiBiase officially start us off.
The crowd is insanely hot here. Off to Bigelow and DiBiase is reeling. The headbutts begin Back off to Hogan and the fans erupt again. Running forearm puts Ted down and he gets battered between the heroes. Hogan gets the windmill punch but Andre trips him because he’s EVIL. DiBiase finally goes on offense and chokes away. Apparently this is the anniversary of Hogan winning the title.
Virgil comes in off the top and hammers away. Hogan vs. Virgil. Who would have ever imagined that would have happened in MSG? Hogan plays face in peril here for a good while which is weird to see as you would think he would do the big hot tag. That shows you what you had in Bigelow. Chinlock by DiBiase as Andre says ring the bell. For once that might actually work.
If Andre told me to do something I’d do it. Also I’d be freaked out as he would be a corpse at this point. Hogan gets up and it’s a double clothesline to send Hogan and DiBiase down. Bigelow had a bad knee at this point which would explain why he’s been in about 10 seconds so far. Hot tag to Bigelow who cleans house. Gorilla press and some headbutts take down Virgil. DiBiase tries the save but Virgil takes a legdrop instead. An assisted splash ends Virgil and we’re done.
Rating: C. Just a match here to make the fans rather happy. Virgil was great for something like this as it let DiBiase get in there without blowing DiBiase vs. Hogan. Good little match here that was fine for a big match on a house show. The hot crowd helped it a lot and this was a nice little addition for some rare content.
Then this singles match from Superstars on May 28, 1988.
Virgil vs. Randy Savage
Savage is WWF Champion but it’s not on the line here. Ted’s early distraction doesn’t work and Savage swings the belt at Virgil to get him to the floor. Another distraction works a bit better and Virgil sends him into the buckle to take over. DiBiase chokes from the floor but Virgil misses a top rope splash. A knee to the back puts Virgil into the buckle and there’s an ax handle for good measure. DiBiase goes after Liz on the floor and Virgil gets in another cheap shot off the distraction. Savage is thrown to the floor and Ted tries to buy Liz. You know Randy won’t stand for that as he decks both of them and the big elbow gets the pin.
Rating: D. Nothing match but this was part of one of the best feuds WWF ever had. The good thing about Virgil is he was able to give us another match without having to put DiBiase in there all the time. You would think Ricardo Rodriguez would have done this more often for Del Rio.
We’ll jump ahead a few years as Virgil didn’t wrestle often. After years of getting abused by DiBiase, Virgil rebelled at the 1991 Royal Rumble. This led to a showdown at Wrestlemania VII.
Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase
Virgil gets one of the three big pops of his entire career here, with the first being when he finally hit DiBiase with the belt. The other will be in less than ten minutes. Virgil pounds away to start and sends Ted out to the floor. Back in and Ted hits a clothesline but an elbow misses a second later. DiBiase, the wrestler, easily takes Virgil down and hits a suplex for two. Things are REALLY slow now compared to just a few moments before. We head to the floor for a bit with DiBiase shoving down Piper, who was on crutches at this point. DiBiase talks some trash so Piper pulls the top rope down but the distraction is enough for a countout.
Rating: D. This was all story but it really should have been Virgil pinning DiBiase, even on a rollup. These two would continue to feud with Virgil actually taking the Million Dollar Title at Summerslam 1991. The problem with Virgil was that after the DiBiase feud, there was nothing for him to do at all. The match was really dull and didn’t have the payoff it needed at the end.
And the rematch from Summerslam 1991.
Million Dollar Title: Ted DiBiase vs. Virgil
This is one of the very rare defenses of this title. DiBiase has Sensational Sherri with him. Piper is Virgil’s mentor so the commentary is going to be rather slanted. Virgil starts fast and hits three straight clotheslines to send DiBiase out to the floor. Heenan is back on commentary but doesn’t want to talk about Hogan. Virgil misses a dive to the floor and DiBiase sends him into the steps to keep him down. Back inside and Ted is in full control but he brags too much and gets caught in the Million Dollar Dream. The fans go nuts but Sherri comes in and blasts Virgil with her loaded purse for the DQ.
Rating: D. Actually hang on a minute.
The referee says the match MUST continue, sending Sherri to the back and Roddy into delirium. Virgil pounds on DiBiase in the corner but since he doesn’t have much experience he can’t do anything. He tries to whip DiBiase across the ring but gets countered into a ref bump to put both guys down. Ted yells at Piper like the true heel that he is before suplexing Virgil down. A piledriver lays Virgil out but sicne there’s no referee, DiBiase rips the turnbuckle off instead. Ted yells at Piper once too often though, allowing Virgil to ram him into the buckle twice for the pin and the title. Piper goes NUTS.
Rating: D+. This is a good example of a match where the crowd and announcing make it much better than it would have been otherwise. Virgil just wasn’t that good and this was his one and only storyline with the company due to there being nothing else to his character. How the guy kept a job for so many years with both WWF and WCW is beyond me.
DiBiase said Virgil stole the belt, so he hired Repo Man to take it back. Here’s the result from This Tuesday In Texas.
Ted DiBiase/Repo Man vs. Virgil/Tito Santana
One thing modern WWE programming is great about is recapping stuff. That helps a ton as to someone that is randomly seeing this, this match makes NO sense. In reality, DiBiase had said that Virgil had stolen the Million Dollar Belt and recruited Repo Man to help him get it back, which worked. Since we need to fill in a match slot here, Tito joined Virgil and we get this match. The faces are already in the ring so what do you expect to happen here?
Virgil’s career is in essence over as far as importance goes here. He just had nothing to do once he left DiBiase and that singles feud went on about as long as it could so the WWF kept it going for another few months after it. Repo here is of course Smash from Demolition if you weren’t aware of that. Santana is more or less worthless here as El Matador.
The problem is that after that, no one remembered the great work he did as Tito Santana, as he was just remembered for the stupid gimmick that he did. As for the match, there’s not a lot to say. It’s your standard filler tag match that could have been on any house show or TV show of the era. I don’t know if it’s good enough for here but we’ll see I guess. Repo Man and DiBiase might be the weirdest combination of all time.
The main problem here is that there’s no point to having Santana in there. He didn’t have any feud with either guy that I can remember other than a few random matches with Repo that would have happened just because they were on the same level of the card. This is just a weird combination to have. The wrestling is fine, but it just comes off as weird all around. The match itself is once again the same kind of match that you would expect to see at a house show or on TV.
It’s actually not bad to be fair. It’s nothing to go out of your way to see, but I don’t have a problem with it being on a low level Tuesday PPV. The problem here is that Virgil is the guy that’s getting the hot tag. How is that appealing? With Sherri making a distraction, Repo hits him in the back with a knee to allow DiBiase to get the pin.
Rating: C. This was ok I guess, but it wasn’t anything great. The faces were just overly matched here and it was really easy to tell that. The formula worked fine here as it ca be expected with guys like DiBiase and Santana out there though, so that balances out I guess. This was pure filler.
With the DiBiase feud over, Virgil dropped down the card. Here he is at Wrestlemania VIII in an eight man tag.
Jim Duggan/Sgt. Slaughter/Virgil/Big Boss Man vs. Nasty Boys/Moutnie/Repo Man
Just a collection of lower midcard guys getting a Wrestlemania payday here. Neither team gets an entrance. Instead, Ray Combs of Family Feud is guest ring announcer for this and cracks a few jokes about the heels pre-match. The good guys clean house to start and hit a quadruple clothesline to clear the ring. Heenan announces that Shawn Michaels has left the building. Gorilla sums up our responses: “WHO CARES???”
Anyway Duggan and Sags start things off and it’s Jim hitting a few clotheslines to take over. Off to Slaughter who gets poked in the eye, allowing for the tag to Knobs. Slaughter pounds away to take over before it’s off to Boss Man for a boot to the face. Brian avoids a charge into the corner and Boss Man’s splash misses Repo Man as well, giving the heels control for a bit. Repo crotches himself and Boss Man slugs him down for good measure.
Off to Virgil who seems to mess up almost anything where he jumps into the air. Duggan tries to come in to save his partner but it’s back to Sags to beat on Virgil even more. A pumphandle slam gets two on Virgil and it’s back to Mountie. Everything breaks down and in the melee the Nastys are rammed together, allowing Virgil to steal the pin.
Rating: D. As I said, this was nothing more than a way to throw a bunch of guys onto the show at the same time. This was a much better idea than having four matches eat up a few minutes each as it accomplishes the same goal here. They were out there as filler before the world title match and there’s nothing wrong with that at all.
Then Virgil fell even further. From Summerslam 1992.
Virgil vs. Nailz
There isn’t much to Nailz. He was an escaped convict who wanted revenge on Big Boss Man for abusing him in prison and that’s about it. He attacked Boss Man with the nightstick and Virgil is standing up for his injured friend. Nailz immediately chokes Virgil into the corner but Virgil comes back with some jobber offense. A rollup gets no count on Nailz and it’s back to choking from the convict. We head to the floor and Virgil is rammed into the apron, sending him into a bad acting session. Back in and Nailz hooks a standing chinlock/choke for the win.
Rating: F. There isn’t much to say here. Neither guy was interesting and the match was little more than a way to set up the blowoff match against Boss Man. The problem with that is no one cared about Virgil so all we had was a Nailz squash. Nailz just wasn’t any good and after the Boss Man feud he didn’t have much, other than a horrible sounding feud with Undertaker. Then he went nuts and choked Vince in his office and said he wanted McMahon dead during the steroids trial, basically saving Vince from prison. That’s Nailz’s entire WWF career for all intents and purposes.
From Superstars on April 3, 1993.
Virgil vs. Giant Gonzalez
Gonzalez can’t catch up to Virgil to start so Virgil gets on the second rope and is about the same height. He gets on the top rope and loses a test of strength in a cool spot. Back up and Virgil’s dropkicks have no effect. A chokeslam gives Gonzalez the easy win.
Here’s another such match from Wrestling Challenge on July 24, 1994.
Nikolai Volkoff vs. Virgil
Volkoff is part of Ted DiBiase’s Million Dollar Team. Wrestling is a small world like that at times. Virgil dropkicks him to the floor to start as commentator Stan Lane talks about the history between DiBiase and Virgil. Back in and Nikolai slaps on a quickly broken bearhug but charges into a boot in the corner. Some clotheslines have Nikolai in trouble but DiBiase gets Virgil to the floor. That goes nowhere so Ted throws Virgil $100. This distraction actually works as Nikolai hits a German suplex and piledriver for the pin.
Rating: D. Pretty horrible match here but at the end of the day, it’s Nikolai Volkoff wrestling in 1994. How good of a match are you really going to expect? I loved Lane bringing in the history as so few commentators bring up even major stories like that one. Nothing match but that wasn’t the point here.
Virgil would leave soon after this and hit the indies for a few years. He would eventually appear in WCW as Vincent, the head of NWO’s security. Vincent would occasionally wrestle, including this match at Starrcade 1997.
Scott Norton/Vincent/Konnan vs. Ray Traylor/Steiner Brothers
The Steiners and Traylor had been going to war with the NWO for months so these three are just a random grouping of members for them to fight. There’s no Konnan in sight during the entrances so we’re going to start with a handicap match. Norton is a big strong guy who used to be world armwrestling champion. Vincent used to work for the WWF as Ted DiBiase’s bodyguard. The Steiners’ manager tonight? Ted DiBiase.
Since there’s no Konnan, here’s former world champion Randy Savage to take his place. Savage nearly gets in a fight with the WCW wrestlers in the audience on the way to the ring. For the sake of clarity in this match, Scott will only be used in reference to Scott Steiner. Savage starts with Scott with Randy being shoved back into the corner. A shoulder block puts Savage down but Norton hits Scott in the back to let Savage take over. Off to Vincent who is there to distract the referee while Savage chokes Scott.
Norton comes in for a power vs. power match with Scott, followed by a backbreaker to work on Scott’s back. Savage adds a double ax to the spine, only to have Scott come back with a double underhook powerbomb and a gorilla press slam. Everything breaks down and the NWO is cleared out. Back in and it’s Rick vs. Norton now which is a battle of the tough guys. Rick hits a quick suplex and a Steiner Line followed by a powerslam for two. Traylor, a former member of the NWO, comes in to pound away on Norton as well.
Vincent comes back in and walks into a spinebuster and a belly to back drop. Back to Scott for that wicked spinning belly to belly for no cover. Traylor comes in again as we have the rare heel in peril sequence. Rick puts on a chinlock while rubbing Vincent’s head for no apparent reason. Traylor comes back in but misses a splash, allowing for the tag off to Norton. After a big clothesline, it’s back to Vincent instead of Savage for no apparent reason.
To the shock of no one, Vincent is no match for Traylor and it’s hot tag to Rick. He cleans house and the Steiners hit their top rope DDT on Vincent, only to have Norton make the save. Scott hits the Frankensteiner off the top but this time Savage makes the save. Now it’s Savage in danger of being caught in the top rope Frankensteiner but Norton shoves Scott off the top, allowing Randy to drop the big elbow for the pin.
Rating: D+. Not a bad match or anything here, but why in the world would have have the NWO D team and Savage win this match? The Steiners are the world tag team champions and they’re losing in the second match on the biggest show of the year? This night is supposed to be all about WCW, not about the NWO winning a meaningless match that they don’t need.
Or this one from Nitro on February 8, 1999. Oh and it’s Vince now.
Vince vs. Ernest Miller
Seriously. Vince goes after Sonny Onoo before the bell and Miller jumps him from the apron. Back in and Miller kicks him a few times to send him back to the floor. Another kick sends Vince into the crowd for some brawling. Back inside again and Vince hits a jawbreaker but gets superkicked for the third time. More kicks drop Vince and Miller heads up top, but Sonny gets dragged to the apron which crotches Miller down. Vince grabs a rollup for the pin.
Rating: D-. Vince vs. Ernest Miller just got four minutes on Nitro after a four minute intro. I like that they’re trying to do something with Miller and it’s better than he used to be, but at the end of the day, there isn’t much they can do that is going to make me care about Vince. If nothing else this is bad because it gives him more to brag about when no one is in line to see him at conventions.
Vince would feud with the rest of the NWO Black and White, including this match at Uncensored 1999.
Stevie Ray vs. Vincent
This is a street fight for control of NWO Black and White, because when you think leadership of a heel team, you think Vincent. Since it’s a street fight, Stevie gets checked for weapons. Do you really expect for there to be a good match here? Out to the floor with Vincent in control. Did he ever win a match in WCW? They go into the stands and fight over like 50 empty seats.
Gee WCW, I’m sure you made the right decision to waste all those seats in an arena that you have a huge crowd. Clearly no one would have wanted those seats. Vincent backdrops him to ringside as I can’t believe I’m seeing Vincent in a match on PPV. Middle rope forearm gets two for Vincent. Stevie wakes up and we get the most ridiculous collision spot ever, as Stevie leans forward and Vincent doesn’t move for the spot to him. Horace comes out and hands Stevie a slapjack but Stevie hits a move called the Slapjack (elevated Pedigree) for the pin.
Rating: F. Vincent was in a gimmick match on a PPV in 1999 with Horace Hogan involved in it as well. Do I need to explain to you why this was a failure? The match sucked too and it sucked hard. I mean like a potential Diva in Vince’s office trying to get a job hard. Absolutely horrible match.
Vince would become a country singer later in the year before leaving WCW in 2000. Here’s one more appearance in WWE when he was brought back as Ted DiBiase Jr.’s bodyguard. From Raw on June 14, 2010.
Ted DiBiase/Virgil vs. Big Show/Mark Feuerstein
Morales vs. Muraco to this? Sure….why not? Let’s get this over with, but to be fair this guy isn’t that terrible and has a good bit of charisma. Isn’t Show a Smackdown guy? After Ted gets beaten up, here’s Virgil vs. Big Show. Wow that’s strange to write. Show palms his head. That can’t be pleasant. I guess that’s what he gets paid for though. There’s his chokeslam and then the host uses the Worm for the pin. Oh but he uses an elbow drop instead.
Rating: N/A. Were you expecting anything else? This was fine for what it was.
Virgil was a one note character and to his credit, he did a very good job. The matches weren’t anything to see, but he was good at what he did. Once he got to WCW he was nothing but a hanger on, but Virgil was a good jobber to the stars as people remembered him….I hesitate to say fondly but they did remember him. He was good at one thing and that’s better than a lot of people.
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