Hidden Gems #16: Wrap It Up

Hidden Gems #16
Date: 1997, 2001, 1986, 1980, 1995

I’m finally doing something outside of the full shows and that’s quite the relief at the moment. This time around I’m going to be looking at some completely random matches/segments instead of one big show. I’m not sure what is going to be coming here but that’s what a random number generator is for. Let’s get to it.

Undertaker/Steve Austin vs. Shawn Michaels/HHH
Date: November 15, 1997
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 15,479

This is six days after Montreal so Shawn has about as much heat as you can imagine. It’s also handheld footage so no commentary of course. Austin is Intercontinental Champion so he throws the belt in, as was his custom. They seem to be clipping things a bit too, as Undertaker’s entrance only takes about a minute. Indeed it is as we go from Undertaker dropping the coat to the floor to circling with Michaels. And then the bell rings so I’m even more confused.

Undertaker misses a right hand in the corner so Shawn slugs away, only to get LAUNCHED into the corner (one of my favorite Undertaker spots) so the real beating can begin. The upside down bump in the corner lets Undertaker choke away and he does it again to HHH as well. Austin comes in to work on the arm and hits an atomic drop to make HHH bounce. A poke to the eye gets HHH out of trouble so it’s back to Shawn as the fans get WAY into this all over again.

Austin hits a backdrops and brings Undertaker back in to clean house. They go outside where Undertaker seems to post Shawn but the camera is on the other side of the ring and rather shaky so it’s hard to tell. Back in and Shawn hits the ropes to break up Old School and it’s time to stomp away. HHH gets in a whip to the steps on the floor (as opposed to the steps in the ring) and the choking is on back inside.

The knee drop gives HHH two but Undertaker slugs away at Shawn without much trouble. Shawn knocks him down and there’s the sit up, followed by the double clothesline. The hot tag brings in Austin and it’s time for the big comeback. HHH gets Stunned but Shawn makes the save and kicks Austin low. Austin’s leg is wrapped around the post and we look at the crowd as HHH pulls Austin’s trunks down a bit too far.

We hit the chinlock on Austin and look at the crowd again for no apparent reason. We’re clipped to the hold being broken but Shawn pulls Austin back into the corner. Austin crawls over to the ropes for the tag anyway though and NOW it’s time to clean house. A chokeslam each drops DX and Undertaker Tombstones Shawn for the pin at 12:48 shown.

Rating: B-. It wasn’t a great match or anything but for a big time house show man event, this worked very well. The interesting thing is how Austin looked fine despite being dropped on his head at Summerslam about three months earlier. He looked horrible at Survivor Series but looked normal here, which should tell you everything you need to know about the benefit of hiding weaknesses in a tag match.

Post match Road Dogg (I think) comes in and gets chokeslammed as well. Chyna comes in to get in Austin’s face but backs into Undertaker. The distraction lets Austin hit the Stunner for the big reaction.

Randy Orton vs. Brock Lesnar
Date: November 29, 2001
Location: Kansas Coliseum, Wichita, Kansas

This is a dark match from a Smackdown taping and while the show took place on November 27, I’m assuming they’re putting the TV air date because….well probably because it wasn’t that well researched. Orton is suddenly from Wichita because wrestling likes to lie about things (as they should in cases like this). It’s always weird seeing Lesnar with the lightning bolts or wings or whatever they were on his trunks instead of the straight black.

Lesnar drives him into the corner to start but Orton kicks him away and hits a dropkick. Orton tries to start in on the arm and is suplexes across the ring for his efforts. A cross armbreaker works a bit better for Orton until Brock powerbombs the heck out of him. Some backbreakers into a powerslam into the corner rock Orton and Brock stomps away in the Tree of Woe.

Brock switches to the shoulders to the back for a change and hits a spinning belly to back suplex for two. We hit the camel clutch, with Brock leaning forward towards Randy’s head for a weird look. Now it’s a regular chinlock but Orton fights up with a swinging neckbreaker. The high crossbody (Orton’s old finisher) gets two and a sunset flip out of the corner gets the same. Back up and Brock powerslams him for the fast pin at 5:53.

Rating: C. I always like seeing matches like this because there are no reputations and the guys just have to go out and make the fans care on their own. It was a fine enough match with Orton trying to take away a limb and getting overwhelmed by the power. Imagine that: OVW students being well trained at in-ring work. These two worked well together, which isn’t surprising given how many times they probably fought in both training and on OVW TV.

Universal Wrestling Federation Heavyweight Title: Jim Duggan vs. Terry Gordy
Date: May 30, 1986
Location: Sam Houston Coliseum, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Jim Ross, Bill Watts

Ah the magic of a random button. This is a tournament final for the inaugural title and the UWF is the rechristened Mid-South Wrestling. Hold on though as One Man Gang is here to say he would have won this tournament if he had been invited so this match isn’t happening. Gang says he wants a shot at the winner immediately after so Duggan says make your move.

The fight is on with Duggan taking him to the floor to trade postings. Duggan is busted open badly and seems to have a concussion but why would that stop him? The also busted Gang is knocked outside but comes back in, only to miss the splash. A running shoulder (called a spear) sends Gang outside and we take a break.

Jim Ross runs down the rest of the show (as in Power Pro Wrestling) before throwing it to Duggan for a chat. Duggan talks about how he was given five minutes to get ready to face Gordy and how dizzy he was.

We’re clipped to a taped up Duggan slugging away at Gordy and hitting the three point shoulder. A second attempt is sent outside though and Michael Hayes posts Duggan again. Duggan talks about how Gordy finished him off after that but we don’t actually see it. Well that was rather lame as the Gordy vs. Duggan stuff was less than two minutes long.

US Title: Ric Flair vs. Greg Valentine
Date: July 17, 1980
Location: Norfolk Scope, Norfolk, Virginia

Flair is defending and this is from Mid-Atlantic. This is raw footage so no commentary and again, not the complete match. Valentine bails to the floor to start (shocking I know) so Flair grabs the mic and tells him to have some guts and get in here. Valentine gets in and begs off as this is HEAVILY clipped, with about five seconds between jumps (though you can still tell the general idea). Flair takes him down and works the arm in a variety of ways, including an armbar (with WOO).

Valentine gets up and hammers (hey now) away but Flair gets in what might have been a low blow. The slugout goes to Flair but a knee to the ribs cuts him off in a hurry. Valentine hammers away in the corner and Flair is busted open (of course). Some elbows to the back of the head get some near falls, with Valentine covering vertical instead of horizontally for a weird look. Flair fights up and hits a right hand but falls down due to exhaustion.

Valentine misses a charge into the corner and the comeback is on with Valentine going head first into the corner over and over. A bunch of right hands let Flair hit the WOO and there’s the suplex into the….elbow. Dang it’s weird seeing something other than the big knee that he used forever. Flair wraps the leg around the post and puts on the Figure Four but Valentine makes the rope.

They go outside where Valentine can win the brawl before taking it back inside. A shinbreaker cuts Valentine off again but the Figure Four is broken up. Valentine forearms away on the apron and tries a belly to back suplex but Flair spins onto him for the pin to retain. This was more a collection of clips than a match so no rating, though it looked like a heck of a match.

Post match, Valentine is livid. He would win the title before the end of the month.

And one more to wrap it up.

Women’s Title: Alundra Blayze vs. Lioness Asuka
Date: November 21, 1995
Location: Wicomico Youth & Civic Center, Salisbury, Maryland

Blayze is defending at this is a dark match from a Superstars/Raw taping. Asuka’s (no not that Asuka) entrance isn’t shown but the camera feed is the same as you would see on any regular TV show. Asuka kicks her down to start and hits a shot to the ribs, followed by a suplex for two (Blayze’s bridging escape is always cool). Some kicks put Blayze down into a reverse chinlock but she’s out in a hurry. Blayze kicks her to the floor but she misses a dive off the top.

Back in and Asuka grabs a Sharpshooter (without looking at the camera because she doesn’t know how to work). That makes Blayze scream a lot so it’s off to some choking on the ropes. Blayze fights up with a hair takedown and some legdrops for two, with Asuka rolling outside. This time Blayze follows her out and kicks away but the powerbomb is countered. Asuka goes up so Blayze hits what would become the Stratusphere (with her hands on the mat instead of the rope). Back to back missile dropkicks get two and the German suplex retains the title at 7:37.

Rating: C. This was so many miles ahead of anything most of the American women were doing in the 90s and it’s kind of refreshing to see. It wasn’t a great match or anything but it was an actual match instead of Lawler shouting about various things over and over. You could tell Blayze wasn’t quite into this though and this would be her last match before she trashed the title the next month.

Blayze looks so miserable and gets out of there with almost no emotion on her face at all. If you didn’t know better, you would still know something was very wrong at this point.

Overall Rating: C. Not a bad set but there is only so much you can get out of these random assortments. I like these one off matches but with no theme or anything, it can be kind of hard to pick up on anything. The Flair vs. Valentine match (or at least what you could see of it) was the best, though I can’t exactly imagine that is very surprising. Pretty average in ring stuff here, but the surprises you can find in here are at least worth a look.

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WCCW TV – January 5, 1985: On Free TV No Less!

WCCW TV
Date: January 5, 1985
Location: Reunion Arena, Dallas, Texas
Commentator: Bill Mercer

I might as well knock out a few more of these fort he sake of mixing things up a bit. This is a special edition as we have the Star Wars special, featuring Ric Flair doing his Ric Flair 80s stuff. I’m not sure what to expect from this one but WCCW is hit or miss every single time. Let’s get to it.

Mercer runs down the card, including Kerry Von Erich getting his shot at Flair for the NWA World Title.

Terry Gordy/Buddy Roberts/Chic Donovan vs. Missing Link/Skandar Akbar/Mr. X

This is a Texas Tornado Loser Leaves Town elimination match (pinfall, submission or over the top for a twist) because they’re starting fast this week. No word on why Michael Hayes isn’t in on this but I’d bet on some weird stipulation earlier. It’s a brawl to start (as it should be) with Link being sent through the ropes, much to Mercer’s confusion. Link comes back in with a middle rope headbutt to Donovan as this is completely nuts so far.

Roberts works on Akbar’s knee in the middle and on the apron and Gordy slams Link. In the mess, Link headbutts Donovan down to give Akbar the elimination. A double clothesline gets rid of Mr. X but Roberts is thrown over the top, leaving Gordy alone against Akbar/Link. Gordy slugs away at both of them until the numbers game catches up with him in the corner. Link gets knocked into the ropes so Gordy whips out his spike for Akbar. That’s broken up as well but Link headbutts Akbar out by mistake, allowing Gordy to toss him for the win at 9:58.

Rating: C+. I liked this one a lot more than I would have bet on as they didn’t waste time, got in and out of there with Gordy (I’m trying to get my head around the Freebirds as faces in Dallas) wrecking the villains like the monster he was. Not a good match, but it was the kind of entertaining chaos that it needed to be. I’d still like to know why Hayes wasn’t in there though, as he would have thrived in this.

Kerry Von Erich is ready to fight his heart out for another taste of the World Title. If he loses, it’s all on him.

NWA World Title: Kerry Von Erich vs. Ric Flair

Flair is defending and his headlock takeover is countered into a headscissors for an early standoff. The fight over a top wristlock goes to Kerry but Flair drives him into the corner without much trouble. Kerry hammerlocks him down and then does it again for a bonus. The push off hits the referee in the head but he’s back up to see Flair not being able to suplex Kerry. The headlock has Flair in trouble again and a flying headscissors takes him back to the mat. Flair reverses into a leglock but gets headscissored all over again.

A roll over to the ropes gets him out of trouble this time and Flair hammers away in the corner, this time being yelled at for attacking in the ropes. See what a good referee can do for a match? Flair drops the knee for two and he sends Kerry outside. Back in and Kerry, who seems to be bleeding from the chest, fights out of the corner with right hands. A sleeper has Flair in trouble for all of five seconds before Kerry grabs the backslide (how he won the title in the first place) for two.

A suplex gives Kerry the pin but Flair’s foot is under the rope. Flair hits a shoulder and throws his feet on the ropes but this time the referee catches it in advance. Some right hands set up the Claw on Flair, who counters with a knee to the ribs. The knee drop is countered with a grab of the leg and Kerry throws on the Figure Four. Flair makes the rope for the break as he’s busted open as well. The Claw goes on again but Flair tosses him over the top for the lame DQ at 18:17.

Rating: B. They were starting to cook near the end but then the DQ cut everything off. What we got worked well though as Kerry was a little more coherent this time. You never know what you might get out of him so this was about as good as you could have expected. Flair can do this kind of thing against anyone so you knew he would be fine, but Kerry’s wild card worked out well enough here.

Post break the NWA representative says that Flair abused the NWA ruling and therefore, there must be a rematch. After basically telling the fans to be quiet, he says it’s going to be Flair vs. Kerry again in Texas, and if Flair gets disqualified, he loses the title.

Jake Roberts/Gino Hernandez vs. Mike Von Erich/Billy Jack Haynes

Haynes and Von Erich have Sunshine with them. Mike continues to look rather pitiful as he just doesn’t look like a bit time wrestler. He slams Jake (in his red karate pants look) down to start but Jake is back up with a clothesline. It’s off to Gino but Haynes is right there to clothesline him down.

Haynes’ middle rope fist drop misses though and he seems to be banged up, meaning it’s back to Roberts to take over. That lasts all of thirty seconds before it’s back to Von Erich as they are flying through this match. Mike misses the dropkick so Jake loads up the DDT, drawing Gino in as everything breaks down. The Claw goes on and Jake is done at 3:35.

Rating: C-. Well that was short and fast, with Mike being more of a sad case than anything else. Unfortunately that would get a lot sadder as time went on, but that was the horrible par for the course for the entire family. The match didn’t have time to do anything but at least they got in and out without doing anything too badly.

Overall Rating: B-. When else are you going to get a full World Title match with Flair on free TV? These shows are in their own world but they still have a lot of energy and some entertaining wrestling. You have to be in a certain mood to watch WCCW and this was one of the better ones that I have seen from them over the years. Granted some of that might be Flair, but take what you can get.

 

 

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New Column: The Birds Are Back

After a lot of complaining we’ll talk about something fun for a change with a look at the Fabulous Freebirds.

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WCCW TV – December 28, 1982: The Match That Launched A Promotion

WCCW Television
Date: December 28, 1982
Location: Reunion Arena, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 18,000
Commentator: Bill Mercer

We open with a recap of the first Kerry vs. Ric match in Reunion Arena in 2/3 falls. They split the first two falls but Kerry got disqualified in the third fall. However, since there was so much controversy with three different referees involved, it was decided that something had to be done in the rematch.

Ric, with a deeper voice than usual, says the Von Erichs are in a do or die situation. Always remember: Diamonds are forever, and so is Ric Flair.

NWA World Title: Ric Flair vs. Kerry Von Erich

Von Erich reverses a suplex into the sleeper (sleep hold here) but Ric counters with a belly to back. Kerry will have none of this being in trouble thing and hammers away before trying an early Claw. Ric goes after the hand to get a breather and Hayes yells at him for no apparent reason. Back up and Ric sends him into the corner before getting in another argument with Hayes. Michael is really just being a jerk here with no justification.

Ric tries to climb out and almost loses his trunks. Hayes goes after the regular referee for breaking it up and tells the guys to go at it. The Claw goes on and Flair is in big trouble but gets his foot on the rope with Hayes actually calling for a break. Again, these people have a weird definition of NO DISQUALIFICATION.

The Von Erichs run out and swear vengeance on the Freebirds to a BIG reaction. Oh yeah you knew it was going to be big. They help Kerry out of the ring and nearly bang their heads on the bar at the top of the head.

A lot of replays take us out.

Overall Rating: A-. This was about one thing and they accomplished that goal. I find it even more interesting that people seem to forget how the match ended as most people remember the cage door slamming and the match ending as a result. That goes to show you how important the angle is compared to the match as you really could swap almost anyone in for Flair and have the same match. I could have gone for a quicker ending as the last few minutes kind of drag things down but this was everything it needed to be and gave the fans and company the biggest Christmas gift imaginable.

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Wrestler of the Day – December 20: Fabulous Freebirds

Time for one of the most famous tag teams of all time: the Fabulous Freebirds.

Six Man Tag Titles: Freebirds vs. Von Erichs

And the aforementioned rematch.

Six Man Tag Team Titles: Von Erichs vs. Freebirds

The titles are vacant and this is a Badstreet Match, meaning anything goes. The heat on Michael Hayes is just nuts but the Von Erichs are as over as free beer in a frat house. It’s Kerry, Kevin and the lowly Mike here. Mike tried but he just wasn’t very athletic and it caught up with him. The brawl is on while the announcer is still doing the intros and we’re told there are NO tags, instantly making this more awesome.

The Von Erichs clean house to start but the Freebirds are right back in to keep fighting. Kevin takes off his belt to hammer on Terry Gordy but Mike is thrown to the floor to give the Von Erichs a disadvantage. Terry is sent to the floor almost immediately after and Mike comes back in, only to hit Kerry by mistake. Gordy hits Mike low to put him down and this is going WAY too fast to keep up with.

Kevin has a boot off and is hitting any bird that he can find before a triple dropkick puts Terry outside again. He gets back in and nailed with the boot over and over again before Hayes is pulled back in over the top rope. Mike spends too much time beating up Buddy Roberts though and Hayes gets in a boot shot to the back of his head. Kevin slaps the Claw on Hayes but Gordy makes the save, only to get nailed with the boot some more.

Kevin is knocked to the floor as things slow down to just insane instead of unable to keep track of anything. Gordy rakes Kerry’s face as a cameraman goes down. Mike’s foot is caught in the ropes and Kevin is busted open. Terry hits Buddy with a boot by mistake and Mike sends Roberts to the floor. Everyone is back in again and with everything going nuts, Killer Khan comes in and blasts Kerry with something, giving Hayes the pin.

Rating: A-. Oh yeah I see why this is loved. They did not stop for nine minutes straight and just beat the tar out of each other the entire time. There’s no way you can have the Von Erichs lose a straight fight and this sets up the Von Erichs vs. Khan which is fine to keep things going. Great match, though I’m not sure on Match of the Year.

The team would head to the WWF in 1984 for a handful of matches before Andre yelled at them for being late, basically sending them back to Texas. Here they are in MSG on August 25, 1984.

Fabulous Freebirds vs. Butcher Vachon/Ron Shaw/Pete Doherty

Back to Texas now with two thirds of the original team on WCCW TV on January 6, 1985.

Terry Gordy/Chick Donovan/Buddy Roberts vs. Mr. X/Skandor Akbar/The Missing Link

This is an odd occasion where the Freebirds are faces in this company which is like Ricky Steamboat as a heel. You just don’t see it that often. The second team is Devastation Inc., which was a top heel stable for a long time. This is elimination rules, tornado rules, and you can lose by pin, submission or being thrown over the top rope. It’s also loser leaves town.

The announcer is a very different style. His voice is fine as he apparently used to be a legit sports commentator in the Dallas area, but the way he speaks is odd. He goes over the ways you can win (being counted down for the 1-2-3, being ejected from the ring or giving in via a submission. It’s just kind of odd sounding but in a refreshing way). We’re part of the NWA here also.

Missing Link is RIPPED but he has a green face. Literally, along with black hair that looks like Bozo the Clown’s. The referee is in a WCCW t-shirt and red pants. Odd looking indeed. It’s a big brawl to start as it’ll likely be the whole time. Link almost goes out but manages to come back in. If I were his manager I’d suggest that he Try Force. That should work.

Link goes out but comes back in anyway. This is all over the place and rather hard to keep up with. Only one announce here too which is kind of weird. I told you it was like ECW. Ok apparently you can go through the ropes but not over them. Got it. X tries to get rid of Gordy forever but can’t manage to get him out. Why not autoban him? Donovan is fighting Akbar who is the leader, on the floor.

Never mind as they’re back in now. And never mind that again at Donovan is thrown out. He’s out of the company apparently. Oh wow ok this just got more interesting. X gets pinned by Roberts off a sunset flip but there goes Roberts, leaving us with Akbar/Link vs. Gordy.

Gordy gets Link tied up in the ropes and gets a spike of some kind into the neck of Akbar (A guy named Akbar at a show called Star Wars? Sounds like a trap to me) but Link saves. A few seconds of double teaming later, Link misses a charge to put out Akbar and is dumped out seconds later to end it. Well that was quick.

Rating: D+. It was very exciting but from a quality standpoint it was pretty bad. To be fair I have no idea on the backstory of this though so it’s kind of hard to know why all of this is going on. The match was certainly fun and the gimmicks didn’t overwhelm it. Having it go more than 8 minutes would have helped a lot though. Still not terrible but it could have been better.

The team headed to the AWA for a bit, including this match at SuperClash 1985.

AWA Tag Titles: Freebirds vs. Road Warriors

And this one at WrestleRock 1986.

Road Warriors vs. Freebirds

Thank goodness this is the last match. This actually took place before the other tag two cage matches, but Verne had to go on last on the real card. The tape version makes him seem more humble at least. This is Hayes/Garvin. Hawk and Hayes get things going. Hayes immediately hits a piledriver which is of course no sold. Let the pain begin. Hayes goes into the cage a few times and he’s busted quickly.

Gorilla press to Hayes and Hawk drops a right hand. Garvin runs away from a tag so Hayes tries to climb out. Hawk goes up top as well and Michael is knocked to the floor. Garvin finally gets the tag and he’s tentative at best. Why no Animal yet? Oh there he is, for a TEN REP gorilla press. Now Hayes runs from the tag.

And never mind as he comes in a few seconds alter. Hayes gets in a few shots but Hawk runs him over quickly. He bites the cut on Hayes’ head because Hawk is a little nuts. Garvin comes in to pound on him and it’s back to Hayes for a figure four. Hawk easily breaks it and it’s back to Garvin, whose offense is shrugged off. Not hot tag to Animal and everything breaks down. Hayes pulls out some brass knuckles but he hits Garvin by mistake so Animal gets the easy pin.

Rating: D. According to the announcer that gives the Warriors revenge for something, but again it’s not important enough to tell us about. This was about as dominant of a match as you can see without it being a squash. The Birds never had a chance but they were against the Road Warriors so that shouldn’t be a shock. The Warriors left the AWA after this match.

Freebirds vs. Paul Jones/Manny Fernandez/Ivan Koloff

s Terry Gordy and this would be like Sheamus vs. Runjin Singh. Things break down and an elbow drop ends Jones quickly.

t mean much. Gordy was a monster though and ran through everybody at the end. He would team with Williams in 1992 in one of the most successful yet boring tag teams of the period. Anyway, nothing match and Paul Jones is one of the worst characters and managers of all time. This was from Atlanta as well.

Time to hit TV with Hayes and Garvin entering a tournament for the vacant NWA World Tag Team Titles. Here are the finals and semifinals at Clash of the Champions VII.

World Tag Team Title Tournament Semifinals: Dynamic Dudes vs. Freebirds

The Freebirds try to get in a cheap shot to start but walk into a pair of suplexes, sending them outside. Johnny and Michael get things going with Hayes quickly being taken down by an armdrag. Garvin comes in and gets the same treatment before the shorter Dude comes in for a wristlock of his own. A double elbow drop has Garvin in even more trouble Michael and Shane come back in with Hayes getting caught in a sunset flip for two. Back to Johnny who misses a cross body and crashes to the mat, allowing Jimmy to come back in and stomp away.

World Tag Team Titles: Freebirds vs. Midnight Express

Back inside and Garvin hooks a chinlock but Eaton fights up and sends him into the corner. Instead of trying to put up a fight, Eaton is smart enough to head right to the corner and tag in Lane who DDTs Hayes and tags Bobby back in far too soon. Everything breaks down and Lane dropkicks Hayes outside for a moment. Terry Gordy tries to interfere but gets knocked outside before Garvin takes the double flapjack for two. The referee is with Lane, allowing Gordy to come in and powerbomb Eaton, giving Garvin the pin and the titles.

Gordy would pop up for one more match at the 1989 Great American Bash.

WarGames: Freebirds/Samoan Swat Team vs. Road Warriors/Midnight Express/Steve Williams

In case you don’t know the rules: two guys start for five minutes and then we have a coin toss (the heels will win) and the winning team gets to send in another man for a two on one advantage. This lasts for two minutes until the losing team gets to tie it up at two. After two minutes the winning team goes up three to two. You alternate every two minutes until everyone is in there and when everyone is in there, it’s first submission wins it. No pins.

Eaton vs. Garvin starts us off. Williams is still in his Hogan attire here which makes me laugh. As JR puts it, it’s Beautiful vs. Gorgeous in WarGames which got a chuckle out of me. Garvin controls early but it’s not like it means anything. The Freebirds beat the Express in a tournament final to win the world tag titles so there’s your explanation for this part of the feud. This is more or less back and forth with nothing really to report on.

Dangerously, the Samoans’ manager, says that Hayes will be next about 10 times. Eaton controls for the most part and works on the back of the mullet-tastic Garvin before throwing on a Boston Crab. After Dangerously shouts about Hayes being in next, Terry Gordy comes in next. That’s another great example of a great heel manager. He didn’t accomplish anything but he lied BECAUSE HE COULD. So simple yet so effective.

Gordy comes in and it goes badly for Eaton to put it mildly. Garvin has a glove and tape or something or his hand so this is mainly punching and stomping. He eats a lot of cage too as Garvin is mostly fine. Apparently Eaton failed in his mission to hurt him. Williams comes in to even things up and in one of the most mind blowing spot I’ve ever seen, he picks up Gordy, who is probably 290 at the least, and gorilla presses him EIGHT times into the cage. Just insane.

After some more choking the heels get us back to about even for Samu to come in as Eaton is more or less dead. Double fishhook on him by Garvin which looked very painful. Everyone is in one ring and they need to spread it out a bit. Eacon somehow gets back up and holds the heels off a bit until Animal ties it up again. Again they’re all in the same ring and it’s WAY too crowded in there.

Ah there we go as he and Samu head to the other ring. Much better. They hate each other because of a big beatdown the Samoans gave the Road Warriors and then they beat up Ellering, the Road Warriors’ manager. The Warriors cost the Samoans a spot in the finals of the tag tournament, which brings us here. Animal just destroys everyone as Fatu will be in next.

All six in the same ring still and it’s just stupid. There’s (Rikishi) Fatu to make it 4-3. The Samoans beat down Animal as Williams and Gordy are in the other ring now to space things out a bit. Eaton and Garvin are still fighting and here comes Stan Lane to even it up at four apiece again. That leaves Hayes and Hawk as the last two. The Samoans eat metal as Lane cleans house.

Dangerously to Hayes: Ok so when you go in you go over here. Hayes: I GOTTA GO IN???” Dangerously: There’s no one left! Hayes: Dang. Funny stuff. There are 9 people in the match and 9 are in the same ring. Hayes DDTs everyone to take out the faces and then goes off into the other ring to taunt Hawk. The fans want Hawk with one minute left. Hayes drops Eaton with a hard left and here’s the bird man.

Now it’s first submission wins. Hawk cleans house as it is on in a big way. The faces are dominating here as was the custom in WarGames once everyone got in. Dangerously tries to force the phone through the cage and turns around to see a referee with his arms folded looking at him. I need some wawa music there.

Mainly just punching now with nothing of note as far as flow or anything but that’s a good thing here as there isn’t supposed to be anything remotely resembling order. Look at the first name of the match: WAR. Doomsday Device on Gordy is blocked so Hawk kills Garvin with a clothesline and works on his neck, throwing on a hangman (Hawk grabs Garvin for a reverse neckbreaker and lifts him onto his back in a neck crank/choke) which gets the submission to end it.

Rating: B+. Very solid battle in there which was exactly what this was supposed to be. It’s not a classic or one of the best ever but this was quite good for the point of blowing this feud completely off and have all the feuds in there at once. This was effective for what it was supposed to be and the match was as fun as ever. Good match.

Back to the regular tag team at Clash IX.

Freebirds vs. Road Warriors

Non-title. The Freebirds are still listed as World Tag Team Champions here, despite having lost the titles at a taped show a few days prior to this. Hawk and Hayes get things going and Michael runs from a big right hand. Animal throws him back inside so Hawk can kick him in the face.

And again at Clash XI.

Southern Boys vs. Freebirds

The Southern Boys are Steve Armstrong and Tracy Smothers dressed like Confederate soldiers in their major show debut. The Freebirds jump them to start but get taken down by running forearms. Double clotheslines send the Freebirds to the floor and the fans are all fired up. Garvin and Smothers get things going with Tracy running into a knee in the corner. Hayes tries to interfere so the Southern Boys dropkick both Freebirds outside again.

The Birds would get a World Tag Team Title shot at WrestleWar 1991.

World Tag Titles: Doom vs. Fabulous Freebirds

Post match Reed destroys Simmons with the object. Teddy leaves with Reed.

So as for the story, the Birds had actually lost the titles before they won them. At a TV taping six days prior to this, they were taped losing the titles to the Steiners, as in nearly a week before they won the belts. That was a very different time, as whole PPVs would be spoiled at TV tapings. Can you imagine that happening today?

US Tag Titles: Freebirds vs. Young Pistols

Ok now hold on because this one if about as confusing as possible. Actually this match isn’t but the story leading up to it is cool so I might as well go into it anyway. As for this match, the Steiners were the US champions but when they won the world tag titles from the Freebirds the US belts were stripped and put up in a tournament, which this is the final of. Ok, that’s very standard stuff.

The WEIRD part is how the Steiners got the world tag titles. The Freebirds won them on February 24, 1991 and lost them February 18, 1991. You read that correctly. See, back in the day WCW would tape MONTHS of shows in advance over about a three week period. Think of what TNA does now but on a much bigger scale.

Anyway, the Freebirds won the titles at a PPV called Wrestle War which we might get to later as there’s a great WarGames match on there, which is of course the greatest gimmick match of all time. Anyway, they won the belts on a Sunday, but the taping where they lost the belts (which no one had seen them win yet) took place on the Monday BEFORE the PPV where they won them.

I think you can see the problems that this could cause and it bit them in late 1993 when Sid was supposed to win the world title at Starrcade but at a show in England he legitimately stabbed Arn Anderson with a pair of scissors so obviously he was fired. WCW had about three or four months of tapes set up with him as world champion, so those were now worthless and they had to scrap the whole thing.

This is why in the mid to late 90s on syndicated shows like Worldwide or the Main Event, you never see guys with belts as the commentary could easily be redone. So yeah, the Freebirds lost a pair of titles almost a week before winning them. Their reign lasted -6 days, which is how it’s recorded in a lot of sources. Oh yeah there’s a match here.

The Young Pistols were a cowboy kind of tag team that did nothing at all. It was Tracy Smothers, who would become far more famous and I use that term very loosely, and Steve Armstrong, whose brother is Brian, or Road Dogg. The Freebirds were legendary heels in WCCW out of Dallas and revolutionized heel tag team wrestling. This pairing is nowhere near that as they’re both old and more or less worthless at this point.

The original trio of Buddy Roberts, Michael Hayes and Terry Gordy is gone and it’s now Hayes and Jimmy Garvin who by law had to have made at least 5 adult movies in the 70s looks like he does. Anyway, this is for the midcard tag titles. That’s saying a lot about the tag title scene. Not only was there a strong world tag title scene, but there was enough of one to warrant a midcard tag title. That’s saying a lot.

If nothing else the Freebirds have the greatest theme song ever with Badstreet USA. Oh and they’re part of a stable called the Diamond Mine, which is run by one Diamond Dallas Page. Oh and they have a manager named Big Daddy Dink, who you would know from the 80s as Oliver Humperdink. Ok most of you won’t but he existed. Page is just a manager here and is already in his mid to late 20s here so he started WAY late.

The Birds are supposed to be a rock band here and to their credit Hayes sings their theme song so there we are. The Pistols are from Wyoming of all places. My goodness this has to be a record for longest amount of writing just to set up a match. There’s the bell and it’s Armstrong and Hayes. I can’t tell the Pistols apart which is likely because I don’t want to. Uh oh Ross is using football analogies. This could be a long night.

Brad Armstrong, Steve’s other brother and the most talented of the three comes out to balance out Dink which makes sense at least. The referee throws Dink out so that’s good as Brad leaves also. Steve completely misses a clothesline but Hayes sells it anyway. Have to love that old school mentality and experience shining through there. The Pistols actually aren’t terrible. They’re not good but there are far worse teams.

Ah there we are with some nice cheating to get the advantage swung. Sometimes all it takes is pulling a rope down and the heels are very heelish. Tracy freaking DIVES for a tag which looked a lot funnier than it should have. In a bad looking spot, the Pistols both go for missile dropkicks. Armstrong misses completely and Smothers hits Garvin but Garvin doesn’t do anything and Smothers goes down.

The Pistols are all over the place but they’re not hitting a lot of stuff. Dusty says there are going to be new champions here. Gee Dusty you think? In a tournament final there will be new champions?

After a ref bump, a masked guy in what would be called a black chicken suit comes out and beats up the Pistols, hitting both with DDTs from the middle ropes which would be the same as they stand on the mat while he does them but whatever. That gets the Birds the titles. While it was never revealed on TV, the guy in the suit was Brad Armstrong.

Rating: B-. I liked it. It’s a very formula based match but that’s often times the best thing you could ask for and this is no exception. It’s basic heel vs. face stuff but it held my attention for ten minutes which is more than most modern tag matches do. This was fine, but some people would be bored with it I think.

Off to the infamously awful Great American Bash 1991 with the team joined by the masked Badstreet, who didn’t last long but was incredibly talented.

Young Pistols/Dustin Rhodes vs. Freebirds

They finally make contact with some chops followed by Dustin slamming both of the regular team members. The Birds chill on the floor and Hayes yells at the crowd a bit. To his credit it gets the crowd to start a short Freebirds Suck chant, which is one of the first of the night. Garvin hits Rhodes in the back so Hayes can take over. The Birds hit the Pistols so Dustin takes both Birds down, allowing the Pistols to hit top rope shoulders. The Freebirds go to the floor again as things pause for the third time in less than four minutes.

Smothers finally gets back up to the apron but Hayes drops him with a right hand. We finally get back in and Garvin pounds away on him a bit. Off to Badstreet who dances in and clotheslines Tracy down. Hayes comes back in with a sleeper, which might be the most appropriate move that he could do. Tracy finally breaks out of it and gets a bit of offense in, only to run into a GREAT left hand to put him down.

One more US Tag Team Title match at WrestleWar 1992.

US Tag Titles: Greg Valentine/Terry Taylor vs. Freebirds

It amazes me how far tag wrestling has fallen. There are midcard tag titles here. The Freebirds are faces here and for the life of me I don’t get what was seen in Valentine and Taylor as a team. There are two rings here which is always kind of strange but it’s still cool. The Freebirds both use the DDT here so they’re looking for the quick win. Fonzie from ECW is the referee here.

Taylor and Hayes start us off and the fans more or less hate Taylor. At least they’re smart. It’s just strange seeing the Freebirds as faces. Also Greg Valentine is a champion in 1992. What’s weird about this picture? A backhand chop is a judo chop according to Jim. For those of you unsure, the Freebirds are Jimmy Garvin (no one of note really) and Michael Hayes, who is currently the head writer for Smackdown.

ALL Freebirds so far but this is a long match so there’s plenty of time left. We’re about eight minutes in and the champions haven’t been on offense longer than maybe 20 seconds yet. I could watch Valentine fall on his face every day. It’s just perfectly done. The heels take over for a bit and I emphasize the bit part since Garvin takes over again to get us to even.

Hayes gets a hot tag and cleans house. The crowd is hot tonight which gives me a good feeling about the main event. Hayes gets hit in the back of the head with the Five Arm, Terry’s finisher but it only gets two. Fans are completely behind the Freebirds. Taylor gets a gutwrench powerbomb for two on Hayes which is a move I wish we saw more often. We’re nearly fifteen minutes in and Jesse says it’s too early to go for the figure four.

Valentine works on the arm which is just weird for him but whatever. This has been a good match so I can live with that. Another hot tag to Garvin and he cleans house. Everything goes insane and Garvin gets a DDT on Taylor for the pin and the titles. Solid opener and the crowd is happy so everything worked. The titles would be retired in July so it’s not like it means much.

Rating: B. Great opener here as the crowd was way into it and the title change works well to open a show. Starting a show with a good tag match is pretty much a universally good idea and this was no exception. I’m not a fan of any of these four but this was a very solid match and has me wanting to watch more of the show, which is exactly the point of an opener.

NWA World Tag Team Title Tournament First Round: Silver Kings vs. Freebirds

#2 misses a missile dropkick and Garvin hammers away before getting two off a suplex. Hayes gets the tag and stomps away in the corner before strutting a lot. #1 comes in again as Jesse thinks this sounds like a Dr. Seuss book. A top rope elbow gets two for #1 and the Silver Kings clean house. Things settle down again and #2 hits a dropkick on Hayes and takes him down with a drop toehold.

Back to Garvin who grabs a chinlock for a few seconds before both guys get up and make tags. #1 comes back in and dropkicks Hayes in the ribs before #2 comes in with a missile dropkick for two. Hayes finally nails his big left hand and everything breaks down. The fans want the DDT but get a pair of bad dropkicks to send the Birds outside. The Kings use what would become the 619 to send the Freebirds running away before #2 dives on them both. Hayes accidentally punches Garvin but #1 misses a dive and hits #2. Michael slides in for a small package on #1 for the pin.

NWA Tag Title Tournament Quarter-Finals: Fabulous Freebirds vs. Hiroshi Hase/Shinya Hashimoto

Hase comes in for a few seconds before Hashimoto comes in for his famous kicks. Hayes comes in to pound away with “American right hands”, a JR trademarked term. Hayes hooks a quick armbar but Hashimoto hits him in the throat to escape. Hase hits a gutbuster and shouts a bit. Bach to Shinya for more kicks which is about all his offense consists of. A fallaway slam suplex gets two on Hayes.

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