IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 28, 2019
Location: Melrose Ballroom, New York City, New York
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis

It’s the next to last show before Slammiversary and that means things are getting interesting around here. They’ve done a rather nice job of making Rich Swann look like a star and hopefully that continues this week. At the same time they have to build up Sami Callihan vs. Tessa Blanchard some more, which could be anywhere from a train wreck to a big success. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

The North vs. Deaners

Well it’s better than the Desi Hit Squad….I think. Alexander and Jake start things off with Alexander’s headlocks and shoulders not working well. Jake’s works a bit better and it’s off to Cody, who gets two off Jake’s clothesline. Everything breaks down for a bit and Page gets knocked into a gutbuster for two. Jake comes back in and gets stomped down in the North corner for all of a few seconds before it’s back to Cody. A full nelson backbreaker gets two on Cody and Page stops to yell at a fan.

Alexander’s suplex keeps Cody in trouble and Page grabs a chinlock. Cody fights up and neckbreakers his way to freedom so Jake can come back in and clean house. A splash in the corner brings Cody back in rather soon but what looked to be a Magic Killer is broken up. Jake and Alexander slug it out with Jake no selling a German suplex. Some double teaming puts Jake on the floor and it’s Cody getting thrown off the top. The double Neuralizer gives Page the pin at 10:02.

Rating: D+. I’m still not getting the appeal of either of these teams and neither of them are helping the shows for the most part. The North are the better options and thankfully they haven’t been focusing on being from Canada for the most part. The Deaners….my goodness how long did they put into this idea? Maybe eighteen seconds?

Taya Valkyrie and Rosemary have a meeting in the back about the Monster’s Ball but Rosemary would rather talk about her upcoming title shot. They have a tag match tonight but Taya is worried about their outfits not matching. Rosemary says it’ll be fine. Rosemary: “Trust us.” Taya: “Us?”

Brian Cage is not cleared to compete.

We look at Moose attacking Tommy Dreamer at a House of Hardcore event. Forgive me for not feeling the emotional impact of Tommy Dreamer getting beaten up.

Slammiversary/the rest of the night rundown.

Su Yung/Havok vs. Rosemary/Taya Valkyrie

Taya and Rosemary argue over who is going to start until Havok takes Taya into the corner for some choking. Havok switches it up a bit with choking in another corner before handing it off to Yung. Since Yung is kind of all over the place, her best offense is to let Havok kick Taya in the head. The bloody glove comes out but it’s already back to Havok, who Taya climbs over and makes the tag off to Rosemary. A quickly broken Last Chancery causes everything to break down and it’s Havok vs. Rosemary on the floor. Rosemary kicks a chair into Havok’s face and it’s a double countout at 5:02.

Rating: D+. At least the characters are more interesting here. I’m also glad they didn’t have a pin for a change as you want to keep everyone strong heading into Monster’s Ball. I don’t know why that’s so complicated as countouts and disqualifications can be your friend in a situation like this. A little short, but at least the ending was right.

Post match the brawl continues with Rosemary busting out the tacks. Havok saves Su from going into them but Su hits Havok by mistake. James Mitchell has to come in and keep the peace.

Ace Austin isn’t happy with losing to TJP last week but it wasn’t fair because he didn’t know TJP worked here. TJP comes in, makes fun of his time in WWE, and a rematch is set for next week.

The Deaners drink the loss away when the Desi Hit Squad comes in to mock them. More beer is consumed.

Slammiversary rundown.

Flashback Moment Of The Week: X-Division Title ladder match at Slammiversary 2014.

Eddie Edwards goes to church to confess about his love of violence. The priest turns into Killer Kross, who talks about Eddie trying to find himself. Eddie will wait for Slammiversary while Kross stays and threatens the priest.

John E. Bravo talks to the other referees and says Johnny Bravo completes him. Rich Swann comes in to go after Bravo but Impact and Willie Mack come in. A tag match is made for later.

Sami Callihan vs. Fallah Bahh

Madman Fulton and Scarlett Bordeaux are the seconds here. Bahh glares Sami down for daring to chop him but a Fulton distraction works a bit better. That’s good for an ejection so we’re down to one on two. Sami gets in a clothesline and grabs a chinlock, which works so well that they do it again. Bahh gets back up and hits a running splash, followed by the running hip attack. It’s too early for the Banzai drop so Sami bites the arm. A few kicks to the face set up a hanging Cactus Special for the pin on Bahh at 6:43.

Rating: D. This was back to the old style for Bahh and that isn’t the best thing in the world. He’s not the most interesting guy in the world at his best and this was worse than the previous few times he’s been out there. I’m not sure how bad it’s going to be with Scarlett gone, but it’s not like she did anything here.

Post match Sami says that’s how you get over as only a man can do. Sami wants to say something to Tessa but wants to do it to her face so get out here. Tessa comes out and jumps over the ropes, despite Sami holding the ropes open for her. Sami says Tessa wants to be treated as an equal so he bicycle kicks her. She pops back up and hammers away until the Crists run out, allowing Sami to get in a baseball bat shot to the ribs. Tessa spits in his face so it’s a Cactus Special to leave her laying.

Rascalz vs. Laredo Kid/LAX

Konnan is out with LAX/Kid. It’s a staredown to start but Kid springboard dives onto the Rascalz and we start fast. The ring is cleared out until it’s Kid springboard crossbodying Miguel and then moonsaulting off the top onto everyone else. Back from a break with Miguel getting caught in a reverse powerbomb for a series of splashes for two. Miguel flips out of a belly to back suplex from Santana and makes the tag to Wentz for a breather.

Everything breaks down and Santana sends Miguel into Xavier for a spear. A Batista Bomb plants Wentz so Xavier grabs a running Spanish Fly. Miguel’s enziguri to Kid gives us the big knockdown for a much needed breather. Everyone gets up for the big slugout with the Rascalz getting punched down and stacked up. Kid’s 450 onto all three gets two but the Rascalz are back up to send Kid outside. Santana follows him out and it’s a series of kicks to take Ortiz down. The top rope Meteora gives Miguel the pin at 10:15.

Rating: B. This was pure action from start to finish and that’s all you could ask for out of such a match. The Rascalz have been rolling as of late and Laredo Kid has been a great surprise whenever he shows up. Rascalz vs. LAX is likely going to steal the show at Slammiversary, but then someone is bound to steal LAX because they’re too good to keep around.

Madison Rayne thinks Jordynne Grace deserves a rematch but Kiera Hogan comes in to say this isn’t a sisterhood. She’s a selfish b**** just like all of them, but Kiera is the only one to admit it. Rayne isn’t going to let her bring the ugliness out of the locker room so they’ll fight at some point.

The Rascalz argue over which of the three of them will fight at Slammiversary. They’ll figure it out in a Rascals Extravaganza next week.

Slammiversary card. Again.

Brian Cage arrives and comes in even though he isn’t cleared.

Here’s Cage in the ring for a chat. Cage calls out Michael Elgin, who sent him to the hospital and put him on the shelf. Now Cage is back though and he’s ready for Slammiversary. Cue the doctor, who gets beaten up before he can say anything. Elgin comes in and hits a buckle bomb, followed by an Elgin Bomb.

Elgin holds up the title as Cage pulls himself up, only to get Elgin Bombed right back down. It’s table time and Elgin powerbombs him through it again, which is enough to draw Callis up from commentary. He yells at Elgin and gets dropped, setting up a teased Elgin Bomb but cage is back up. The brawl is on to finish the show. Good segment, though attacking Callis might not have the impact that they were hoping for.

Overall Rating: C-. The main event was the best thing about the show but it wasn’t quite enough to save the whole thing. What worked well here was the direction towards Slammiversary as you can see the build on every match. That’s a good sign as a lot of cards these days barely get any build beyond the bare minimum. It’s well done here though and while the weekly wrestling is up and down, the build has been solid and that’s the more important thing.

Results

The North b. Deaners – Double Neutralizer to Cody

Rosemary/Taya Valkyrie vs. Havok/Su Yung went to a double countout

Sami Callihan b. Fallah Bahh – Hanging Cactus Special

Rascalz b. LAX/Laredo Kid – Top rope Meteora to Ortiz

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 21, 2019
Location: Melrose Ballroom, New York City, New York
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis

We’re about two weeks away from Slammiversary and that could go a few different directions. You can see most of the card from here and that means it’s time for the final push. We also have Tessa Blanchard vs. Jake Crist tonight, which will seem to be setting up Tessa vs. Sami Callihan at Slammiversary. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Tessa Blanchard vs. Jake Crist

Sami is here with Jake. Tessa goes right to it with the forearms to send Jake outside for the suicide dives. Back in and Magnum is superkicked out of the air. The fans tell Jake to go back to Ohio as he forearms away in the corner. A Russian legsweep into Naomi’s reverse Rings of Saturn keeps Tessa in trouble for a bit before it’s off to the chinlock.

That’s broken up without much effort and they’re back to their feet. They forearm (again, which is better than exchanging punches in this case) it out until Tessa grabs a tilt-a-whirl DDT for two. A Death Valley Driver gives Jake the same but Tessa kicks him in the face three times in a row. Magnum finishes Jake at 7:32.

Rating: D+. Not awful here with the main positive being Tessa being treated like any male wrestler. A lot of the time in these matches you can see the man taking something off his offense but they didn’t go that way here and it made things a lot more believable. It still wasn’t very good though with a lot of forearms and strikes until more strikes set up the finish. Tessa vs. Callihan could be….something.

Post match Callihan comes out to yell at Jake. Tessa stares Sami down but here’s Eddie Edwards to go after Madman Fulton, who he is scheduled to face tonight.

Eddie Edwards vs. Madman Fulton

Eddie hits a suicide dive and we take an early break. Back with the bell not having rung yet (THANK YOU!) and Eddie slugging away at the monster. A chokeslam onto the apron cuts Eddie down though and they head inside for the opening bell. Fulton throws him around to start and then rams his own head into the buckle. A one hand chokeslam plants Eddie as Sami is rather pleased on the floor. There’s a suplex for two and Fulton’s smile is rather creepy.

The powerbomb to the floor is blocked and Eddie manages a hurricanrana to avoid a bad case of death. The Blue Thunder Bomb gives Eddie two but he has to knock Sami off the floor. Instead of following up it’s the suicide dive to send Sami into the barricade. Eddie grabs Kenny but Killer Kross pops up on screen. He has Sandman tied up and under a hood so he can pour water over Sandman’s head. As the torture ensues, Fulton grabs the swinging Downward Spiral for the pin at 5:47.

Rating: C-. They have an idea here but what if you don’t mind seeing Sandman get tortured like this? Fulton is quite the monster and knows how to work like one, which is a big reason why he’s going to stand out around here. They have big guys but they don’t have monsters like him, which is the kind of thing that can help them out a lot.

Eddie goes to help Sandman.

Post break Alisha Edwards cuts Eddie off because, duh, it’s a trap. Eddie storms off after him anyway.

Moose vs. Tommy Dreamer

Moose shrugs off some shots in the corner and chops away but Dreamer’s clothesline takes him down. They head outside with Dreamer backdropping him on the concrete and peeling back the floor mats. Moose drops him onto the apron though and Dreamer thinks that it hurts. Back in and we hit the chinlock but Dreamer is right back up with a cutter.

The snap jabs put Moose right back in control until a DDT gives Dreamer two. A superplex gives Dreamer two, followed by a spear for the same. With the wrestling not working, let’s bring in a chair, sending Moose behind the referee. Moose kicks the chair into Dreamer’s face and it’s No Jackhammer Needed to finish Dreamer at 8:18.

Rating: D. What the heck was that? Moose is a powerhouse and about to have one of the bigger matches at Slammiversary but he has issues beating Tommy Dreamer? After Dreamer got in quite a bit of offense and near falls. Sometimes it’s ok to crush someone and that’s the case with Dreamer here.

Post match Moose loads up a Van Terminator but Rob Van Dam makes the save.

Taya Valkyrie and John E. Bravo go into a stairwell to talk to Rosemary about Su Yung. Rosemary wonders what is going on with Taya but suggests that she’ll help in exchange for a title shot. Taya rolls her eyes and makes the offer. Rosemary promises to have her people call Taya’s people.

Johnny Impact is ready for tonight’s triple threat against Rich Swann and Michael Elgin. He’ll win the X Division Title at Slammiversary.

Knockouts Title: Su Yung vs. Taya Valkyrie

Su is challenging and has James Mitchell and Havok in her corner. They slug it out to start and the early Panic Switch attempt is blocked. Taya misses a charge in the corner and gets forearmed in the face, only to send Su into the buckle. The running hip attack sets up some gyrating into the running Meteora in the corner. More gyrating lets Su get up and Taya misses a charge into the corner.

A headscissors sends her into the buckle again and it’s off to something like a reverse Koji Clutch. Yung gets two more off a hanging Pedigree and it’s time for the bloody glove. That takes a bit too long though and Taya faceplants her for two of her own, followed by a Codebreaker on the arm (makes sense). Taya goes up but Havok hits her with a forearm for the DQ at 6:19.

Rating: D+. This was a setup for a future match rather than anything that mattered on its own. There’s nothing wrong with that and you can feel a big title match coming up at Slammiversary. What matters most here is keeping both of them strong, which was done well here, even if the DQ kind of came out of nowhere.

Post match here’s Rosemary but Mitchell says they’re not here for violence. At Slammiversary, it’s time for some history: the first ever women’s Monster’s Ball match with Taya defending against Rosemary, Taya and Havok.

Here’s Ace Austin for a chat, including a plug for his shirts. He hasn’t been pinned around here and therefore he wants some fresh competition. Someone needs to come out here and stop him from being the future of the X-Division.

Ace Austin vs. TJP

This works. TJP gets a rather weak WELCOME BACK chant and he starts fast with a headscissors. A handspring armdrag sends Austin to the floor and that means a springboard slingshot dropkick. Austin sends him into the apron though and hits a dropkick of his own before diving back in to break the count like a smart man. Back in and TJP gets in a hurricanrana, followed by a high crossbody. The Detonation Kick finishes Austin at 2:17. Hopefully TJP goes somewhere because an undefeated Austin had some potential.

Eddie is still looking for Kross.

The Rascalz don’t want to train again but have a Tag Team Title shot at Slammiversary. Konnan comes in and says they remind him of LAX. It took guts to walk into the LAX clubhouse and try something like that but the Rascalz better be ready for a fight at Slammiversary. These circle segments are good, but how has Rob Van Dam not shown up for one yet? It’s kind of the layup of layups.

This week’s Flashback Moment of the Week: Ethan Carter III beats Bully Ray in a Texas Deathmatch at Slammiversary 2014. Dixie Carter even gets in a cameo.

Eddie finds someone who is not Sandman under the hood. Kross pops up and the fight is on with Alisha coming in to break it up. Eddie says this is who he is and Alisha storms off. We’re still doing this story? Eddie bites Kross’ face and a lot of blood flows. The murder rate spiking around here wasn’t something I would have bet on.

Sami Callihan wants Tessa Blanchard at Slammiversary.

Slammiversary rundown.

Rich Swann vs. Michael Elgin vs. Johnny Impact

Non-title. Elgin and Impact go after Swann to start but once he’s thrown to the floor, it’s time for the villains to slug it out. Swann springboards back in to take them both down before knocking Elgin outside. Impact dives onto both of them but only hits Elgin as Swann is smart enough to move away when a large man is diving at him.

Back in and Elgin German suplexes both of them at the same time. You know, because he can do something like that. Swann is back up with a hurricanrana on Elgin and a kick to Impact’s head gets two. Elgin plants Swann but gets kneed in the head by Impact, who adds a break dancing splash. A swinging sitout Rock Bottom gives Elgin two on Impact as Swann is still down in the corner.

Rating: B. Swann has benefited greatly from these main event matches, mainly because he’s been treated not only as an equal but also a bigger deal in some cases. Having him get a fall here is a big deal and something that makes the X-Division Title feel like that much more important. That’s how you build a star and it’s working well here.

Post match Elgin comes after Swann so Rich drops him as well as Impact again. Cue John E. Bravo with the Ultimate X to deck Swann though….until Brian Cage is back. House is cleaned and Cage powerbombs Elgin to end the show. Cage looked awesome, which is the case when you’re a returning monster.

Overall Rating: C+. Maybe it’s how bad Raw and Smackdown have been as of late but this show did a good job of making me want to see Slammiversary and building up some names at the same time. It’s far from a perfect show but what matters here is that things are looking like they’re moving in the right direction. You don’t see that very often in WWE and this place (plus Ring of Honor) is doing it fairly well. It can be done, if the company actually puts in the effort, which is what happened here. Nice job.

Results

Tessa Blanchard b. Jake Crist – Magnum

Madman Fulton b. Eddie Edwards – Swinging Downward Spiral

Moose b. Tommy Dreamer – No Jackhammer Needed

Taya Valkyrie b. Su Yung via DQ when Havok interfered

TJP b. Ace Austin – Detonation Kick

Rich Swann b. Michael Elgin and Johnny Impact – 450 to Impact

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Rebellion
Date: April 28, 2019
Location: Rebel Sports Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

It’s back to pay per view for these people after some rather uninspiring television (though the go home show was good). The wrestling has been more than adequate but there’s very little that makes me want to watch this show. Now, that doesn’t mean this show will be bad, but rather than I haven’t been thrilled getting here. Let’s get to it.

The opening video asks what a rebellion is and how important it is to fight, all over clips of the feuds on the card. Not bad at all, as the recap videos have gotten better as of late.

Petey Williams vs. Jake Crist vs. Aiden Prince vs. Ace Austin vs. Cousin Jake vs. Eddie Edwards

Bonus match because a six match card wasn’t going to work. One fall to a finish and Jake is one of the Deaners. The brawling is on to start with Eddie hitting a suicide dive on Jake but getting taken down by a slingshot hurricanrana from Petey. Prince gets a running charge for a dive but Crist cutters him out of the air and onto the pile for the massive crash that would have taken Prince out even without the cutter. Petey Russian legsweeps Crist into the Sharpshooter with Deaner making the save.

That allows Austin to start his handspring into a kick on the apron but Crist is right there with another cutter from the top. A suicide DDT drops Deaner but it’s Petey up with a slingshot Codebreaker to Crist as he lands on Eddie for a cool crash. Prince’s 450 gets two on Crist with Prince making the save, earning himself a kick in the head from Austin. Eddie is back in with a tiger driver for two on Austin with Deaner making the save. That earns him a Canadian Destroyer from Williams but Austin dives in for the rollup pin at 4:59.

Rating: C+. It felt like an Impact match but I like keeping something like this short. There’s no need to have them go through spot after spot when you can just do the crazy spot fest until someone gets the pin. Austin has needed a win and this is a good star for him. I could see him going somewhere and anytime I could see more magic, I’m rather pleased.

The announcers preview the rest of the card that you already bought.

Impact Plus is coming as a replacement for the Global Wrestling Network. Good, as the thing was a mess from the start so a relaunch is a good idea.

Sami Callihan is sick of Rich Swann smiling at him and not meaning any of it. Tonight the Death Machine is coming for Swann in an OVE Rules match. He’s going to break Swann’s legs because he loves him like a brother.

Rohit Raju vs. Scarlett Bordeaux

This was set up earlier today as a replacement for the live Smoke Show. Raju has both Gama and Raj Singh with him like Scarlett has Fallah Bahh. Scarlett starts fast and takes over in the corner until a trip puts her down. That earns Raju a walk over his back so he takes Scarlett outside for a Russian legsweep into the barricade.

Back in and Scarlett is fine enough to chop away, setting up a headscissors into a Crossface to put Raju in even more trouble. That’s broken up so Scarlett snaps off a German suplex to send Raju to the floor, meaning a big dive follows him out. Back up and Raj crotches her on top, allowing Raju to load up a Stinkface. Since you don’t do that to Scarlett, it’s a low blow into the belly to back kneeling piledriver to give Scarlett the pin at 5:03.

Rating: D. I love Scarlett’s character for a variety of reasons, but having her do the same match over and over again is going to take away the appeal in a hurry. This was Raju being a cocky jerk who got in trouble for being stupid. The problem is that’s how most of her matches are likely to go and you can only do that for so long. It didn’t help that the match wasn’t very good and was another bonus match, which kind of goes to show you how thin the card is so far.

We recap Moose/The North vs. the Rascalz. The Rascalz made fun of Moose for his bad luck with women, meaning it was time for Moose to destroy all of them. The numbers got the better of him though and Dezmond Xavier stole a win. Therefore, it’s time to bring in some help.

Moose/The North vs. Rascalz

The Rascalz gets smart by rapid firing in and out against Moose with kicks to the legs and slingshot hilos. Moose pops to his feet though and hands it off to Josh Alexander to suplex Dezmond for two. A backbreaker gets two and Ethan Page adds a swinging version for his own. Dezmond sends the North into each other but Page is fine enough to run him over and prevent the hot tag.

Everything breaks down and it’s the big shoving moonsault to the floor so Wentz can take out Page. Miguel’s running flip dive is pulled out of the air by raw Moose power, meaning a swing into the barricade. Dezmond isn’t done though and uses Josh’s back as a launchpad to take Moose out. Back in and Alexander puts Miguel and Dezmond on the same shoulder at the same time in an impressive power display.

That’s broken up and it’s a 619 into a top rope Meteora into a Swanton into the Final Flash from Dezmond onto Alexander. Thinking quickly though, Page Border Tosses Miguel onto both of them for an impressive looking save. Wentz gets thrown over the top onto Miguel, leaving Dezmond to take a series of kicks to the face. The Burning Hammer into the whip spinebuster sets up No Jackhammer Needed to finish Dezmond at 9:22.

Rating: B. This was a lot of fun, though they were kind of in trouble with the booking. You don’t want the new team in the North losing and Moose can’t take another fall, but the Rascalz really need to stop losing. It’s the lesser of two evils, and thankfully it came at the end of an entertaining, fast paced match. More of the usual from the Rascalz in other words.

Johnny Impact and Taya Valkyrie aren’t worried about their title defenses.

We recap Taya Valkyrie vs. Jordynne Grace. Taya is the confident champion but Grace pinned her in a non-title match and then cost her a match against Madison Rayne. Grace is a monster but Taya doesn’t seem scared.

Knockouts Title: Jordynne Grace vs. Taya Valkyrie

Jordynne is challenging and charges straight at the champ to start. They head outside with Taya being powerbombed onto the apron. Back inside and a middle rope backsplash gives Grace two. Taya snaps the arm across the top rope though and starts wrapping it around the steel. That’s only good for a one so Taya hits a Bubba Bomb to set up a cross armbreaker. Grace is in the ropes in a hurry so Taya pulls her back down into a hanging DDT for two.

Taya grabs something like a cousin of the Rings of Saturn but gets driven hard into the corner for the break. One heck of a clothesline gives Jordynne two and a Michinoku Driver gets the same with the arm not holding up enough for the pin. Taya goes up and is quickly caught in a Muscle Buster for a pair of very close twos. A pinfall reversal sequence gives us more near falls but the arm is too bad for the Grace Driver. Taya pulls on the arm again and it’s the Road To Valhalla to retain the title at 8:59.

Rating: C. The story was there but the ending felt rather flat with Taya just winning clean after the arm work. It makes sense, but I was expecting more from the monster Grace. The match was fine enough, though I’m not sure who is supposed to challenge Taya now. Madison Rayne? Is that where we’re going now? Or maybe a face Tessa? I’m not sure how that would go but it would be different.

Gail Kim is ready for Tessa Blanchard tonight.

We recap Sami Callihan vs. Rich Swann. Callihan’s family took Swann in as a kid and Swann considered Sami family. Then Sami went nuts and they split, with Swann declining an invitation to join OVE. You don’t do that to Sami, so he’s coming for the X-Division Title.

X-Division Title: Sami Callihan vs. Rich Swann

Sami is challenging and anything goes. No dancing from Swann here so you know he’s taking this one seriously. An exchange of shots to the face goes to the champ and it’s already time to head to the floor. Swann staple guns him in the head and the weapons are thrown inside. Back in and Swann’s sunset flip is broken up by a staple gun to the mouth.

A Broski Boot makes it even worse for Swann and his suicide dive is knocked out of the air with a metal shot to the head. The Cactus Special on the apron should be the pin but here’s it’s not even enough for a cover. Instead Sami puts a piece of barricade between the ramp and the steps, which we’ll get back to later. Back in and Swann gets out of a Razor’s Edge, only to be suplexed through an open chair for two.

Swann again isn’t dead and swings away with a cookie sheet. That earns him a spit to the face, which Swann licks off and drops Sami for two more. Wet floor signs to the head have Sami down on the ramp and a Lethal Injection makes it even worse. The fans chant HOLY S*** at that, but not at the suplex through the chair earlier? Those are some weird standards. Now it’s time for the bridged barricade, with Sami going with a groin claw into a Cactus Special onto said barricade….for two.

With that out of the way, it’s time for a big bucket of Legos. A super hurricanrana brings Sami down onto those but since they don’t mean much more than pain, he’s right back up with powder into Swann’s face. That means a super Cactus Special onto the Legos for two and now it’s a barbed wire baseball bat. Swann spits at him, hits Sami low, and, after an I Love You from Sami, hits him in the head with the wire. A Crossface with the barbed wire bat makes Sami tap at 16:03.

Rating: C+. They lost me hard here with one big spot after another that not only didn’t finish the match but didn’t really seem to cause that much damage. A super piledriver should finish someone off and here it just gets two? After a piledriver on a barricade? The other problem was the Legos, which seem like something you would see in a comedy match, but then a few seconds later it’s a barbed wire baseball bat. You can’t jump from one tone to another like that so fast and it didn’t work.

Tessa Blanchard talks about how much respect she has for Gail Kim, who was here before the Revolution. Then Gail made it personal and tonight Tessa is finishing it. TULLY BLANCHARD comes in and says make him proud.

We recap Tessa vs. Gail. Kim cost her the Knockouts Title in January because Tessa wouldn’t respect her as guest referee, sending Tessa into a legal battle to get rid of Gail. It worked to a degree, but Gail came out of retirement for this match. It’s a good build, though I’m more than a little worried about Tessa losing.

Gail Kim vs. Tessa Blanchard

They stare each other down until Tessa starts slugging, earning herself a stomping in the corner. Tessa is right back with a running hurricanrana to send Gail outside, setting up the big dive. Gail pulls her into the post but gets caught with a Codebreaker out of the corner for two. A powerslam gives Gail two of her own but the Black Widow is countered into a backbreaker.

The trash talk starts rolling, with Tessa even yelling down at Gail’s husband in the crowd. Gail misses a charge and falls out to the floor, setting up a double posting for a double knockdown. Tessa takes her time getting up and gets caught in the Hartbreaker around the post, which still doesn’t make a ton of sense. Back in and Gail fires off forearms to set up a spinning high crossbody.

With the required YOU STILL GOT IT chant going, Tessa shoves Gail to the ramp, where a spinning full nelson faceplant sends her crashing down to the floor. That’s not quite enough for the countout and Tessa is stunned. The slingshot suplex is countered into Eat Defeat for two so Gail goes up. With Tessa following up, she gets caught in a dragon sleeper so it’s a bite to the elbow for the break.

You don’t see that one everyday, which is also the case with the super gorilla press drop to send Gail right back down. Magnum gets two so it’s off to a cobra clutch Crossface for something new. Gail gets her foot on the ropes but that doesn’t count this time as Tessa rolls into the middle of the ring for the clean tap at 16:03.

Rating: B+. Match of the night here with Tessa getting the signature win and continuing to look like the best female wrestler in the world (and one of the best anywhere). They beat each other up here and thankfully they went with the right ending. Tessa is looking like the next megastar though and hopefully Impact knows it.

Post match they hug, as Tessa might be on her way to a face turn. Gail gets the big sign of respect.

An angry Brian Cage promises to rip Johnny Impact’s head off tonight.

We recap Johnny Impact vs. Brian Cage. Johnny barely survived at Homecoming and kept dodging giving Cage a rematch, eventually turning heel because he’s tired of the fans thinking they know everything. He then got senior referee Johnny Bravo in his pocket, so tonight it’s Lance Storm as guest referee. That’s going to be fine because Storm is Canadian, meaning he has values. And he hosts a podcast with the company’s boss.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Brian Cage vs. Johnny Impact

Impact, with Taya and Bravo, is defending and Lance Storm is guest referee. Cage comes out with the Terminator gear, which didn’t do so well for him last time. They continue a trend tonight by starting fast with Impact being driven into the corner and walking into a German suplex. The F5 gets two less than a minute in and it’s the apron superplex for two more as Cage is on fire to start.

Another apron superplex is countered into a German suplex from the champ and some knees to the face have Cage in trouble. The standing shooting star is countered with raw power and Cage shows off the standing moonsault for another two. Johnny rolls to the ramp and comes back with a Spanish Fly to the floor (which caused Cage to go to the emergency room after the show).

A running knee to the face busts Cage open and we hit the chinlock as he tries to get some feeling in his back again. Cage Hulks Up and shrugs off an enziguri but a springboard spear gives Johnny two. Taya and Bravo set up a table at ringside as Johnny gets two off the Moonlight Drive. They head outside with Johnny putting him on the table and calling a very loud spot.

Cage pops up and powerbombs him through the table but has to go after Bravo. The distraction lets Impact hit Cage with the belt (right in front of Storm, who “didn’t see it”). Instead Taya pulls Storm to the floor so Johnny can baseball slide him from behind for the expected ref bump.

Back in and Johnny throws the title to Taya and plays dead, leaving Taya to take a powerbomb from Cage. After that rather unnecessary portion, Impact hits Cage with the title and misses Starship Pain (as always) so Bravo can run in for two. Storm superkicks Bravo and Cage does the same to Johnny, setting up a Falcon Arrow called the Drill Claw for the pin and the title at 13:17.

Rating: B-. Oh yeah that injury sucked the life out of Cage, who spent most of the rest of the match stumbling around and taking right hands to the face. What we got was still good, but the weakened Cage was hard to ignore. They did get the ending right though, as Cage had to win the title after being screwed out of it so many times.

Post match Cage celebrates….and Michael Elgin debuts (good thing they have his Twitter handle ready for his name graphic). Elgin powerbombs Cage and counts his own pin before walking away. I’m surprised Elgin was brought back into a major promotion but maybe things have blown over.

Slammiversary is in Dallas on July 7.

Konnan fires LAX up for their title match in the main event. He didn’t want it to come to this but now that it has, they’re coming out guns blazing. Konnan can still cut a fired up promo.

We recap the Lucha Bros vs. LAX, which started as a dream feud with the Bros winning the titles in Mexico. LAX turned on them and tonight it’s Full Metal Mayhem (TLC) to blow everything off once and for all (or as close to Impact can get to doing that).

Tag Team Titles: LAX vs. Lucha Bros

The Bros are defending and it’s TLC but you win by pinfall or submission. The champs try some dives to start but get knocked out of the air as LAX starts fast. Some tables are set up against the barricade and the Bros are right back with running flip dives through said tables to take over. They get inside for the first time with kicks to Ortiz’s face setting up the wheelbarrow splash for two.

Santana comes in and gets caught in a trashcan with a double superkick. A table is set up in the corner but Ortiz rolls Santana up, sending him into a cutter on Pentagon. The top rope Codebreaker from Ortiz sets up the double belly to back faceplant but Fenix dives in for the save. Santana is back up and stomps Fenix down in the corner. Two chairs are set up in the corner and Fenix gets caught in a hanging cutter/top rope double stomp combination for the latest near fall (no save this time).

Santana kicks Pentagon over the barricade and it’s time for the ladder. Everyone gets back in for the slugout before sitting down in four chairs. They slug it out again, though this time in a little more comfort. LAX gets the better of it and bust out the forks. The Bros get back up so some chairs are pelted at their heads, only to have LAX collapse as well. LAX gets up again and put Fenix on top before setting up six chairs in front of the corner.

Pentagon makes the save and it’s the spike Fear Factor onto the chairs….for two. My goodness it’s bleeding over from the X-Division Title match. The Bros load up a regular spike Fear Factor (If the one onto a chair doesn’t work, the regular one certainly will!) but Fenix makes the save, allowing Santana to drive Pentagon through the chair. The fans want and receive a ladder, plus a table on the ramp.

Fenix pops up though and grabs a Spanish Fly off the ladder through the table to make Ortiz vibrate. Back in and it’s a Pentagon Driver to put Santana through a chair for two more so Pentagon loads up two more tables. That’s not enough so we’ll add thumbtacks but since that takes WAY TOO LONG, Santana is awake enough to slug it out with him on top of the ladder. Ortiz gets back up and grabs Pentagon, allowing Santana to stab him in the head with fork. That’s enough for the powerbomb through the tables and the tacks to give LAX the titles back at 20:51.

Rating: A-. While a lot of the stuff has been done before, they went with the right idea here: let two talented teams and four talented guys go nuts with whatever they can find. Sometimes you don’t need to go for the storytelling and need to just shoot for the carnage, which is what they did here. I can overlook some of the near falls as this was a heck of a fight, though they need to go do something else as they’re not topping this anytime soon.

Post match everyone pulls themselves up and Konnan orders them to hug. The big show of respect, including some minor members of the locker room (and Taylor Wilde) coming out to celebrate) ends the show.

Overall Rating: B. As is almost always the case, this promotion is much, much better when there’s less focus on the stories. The action was good (well mostly good) and they made the right call with the Tag Team Titles main eventing. It’s a solid show up and down with two very good matches, though they need to have the TV to back it up, which is always the issue. For now though, a very good show that is worth seeing, if you fast forward a little here and there.

Results

Ace Austin b. Cousin Jake, Eddie Edward, Aiden Prince, Jake Crist and Petey Williams – Rollup to Jake

Scarlett Bordeaux b. Rohit Raju – Belly to back kneeling piledriver

Moose/The North b. Rascalz – No Jackhammer Needed to Xavier

Taya Valkyrie b. Jordynne Grace – Road To Valhalla

Rich Swann b. Sami Callihan – Crossface with a barbed wire baseball bat

Tessa Blanchard b. Gail Kim – Cobra clutch Crossface

Brian Cage b. Johnny Impact – Drill Claw

LAX b. Lucha Bros – Powerbomb through two tables to Pentagon

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

I feel like I always need to confirm that Impact Wrestling still does pay per views. This is their spring offering, though it isn’t clear who is rebelling against what. Lately the company has been rebelling against the idea of going with anything fresh and it has become a bit of a chore to watch. That being said, their pay per views tend to be much better than television because it’s all about the in-ring product, which is usually an improvement. Let’s get to it.

Knockouts Title: Taya Valkyrie(c) vs. Jordynne Grace

We’ll start off with a match that could go either way as Valkyrie seems like someone they want as a long term champion but Grace is a monster who no one has been able to slow down yet. Now the problem with that is that once she loses, a lot of that momentum goes sailing out the window. I’m also thinking that the show taking place in Canada isn’t going to do Grace’s chances any favors as Valkyrie is of course Canadian.

I’ll take Grace winning though, as it might be a bad night for Valkyrie and her husband. The division has been needing some fresh blood for a long time now and Grace could be it. Let her run some people over for a few weeks or months before losing it back to someone else. Like the best female in the world not working for WWE (or perhaps including that batch) in Tessa Blanchard. But yeah, Grace wins here, as she should.

X-Division Title: Rich Swann(c) vs. Sami Callihan

This story has been more interesting than I would have guessed as Callihan oddly grows on me more and more. Swann is a good choice for the title as he can wrestle that X-Division style, but there comes a point where Callihan has to win something and that hasn’t been the case yet. He’s been chasing the title for a few months now and this might be the night he gets there.

So yeah I think Callihan gets the title here as there’s little reason to not give it to him. You can even go somewhere with the issues between Swann and Willie Mack. It’s a good idea to give Callihan something as he’s going to have suitors and putting a title on him could make him happier. I wouldn’t be surprised to see him move towards the World Title scene sooner rather than later either. For now though, the X-Division Title will do.

Tag Team Titles: Lucha Bros(c) vs. LAX

This is Full Metal Mayhem, which loosely translates to TLC With Pins. These teams have been feuding for months now with LAX dropping the titles and then turning heel, meaning it’s time for a major gimmick match to blow it off. LAX has looked like stars over the last year and getting them against a team like this, one of the best in the world (maybe even the best), has done nothing but good things for them.

I’m basically flipping a coin here but I’ll take the Lucha Bros to retain. We can worry about no one but LAX being on their level later, because this match is going to rock. These four work so well together and the Lucha Bros can turn anything they do into a classic. I’ve been nearly drooling over this match since I first heard about it and that’s not going to change now. It should be great and could go either way but I’ll take the Bros to retain.

Gail Kim vs. Tessa Blanchard

I’ll spare you another rant about Impact’s obsession with Kim and go with how well this match has been built up. The story started months ago but thankfully they’ve waited until the pay per view to actually set it up. As worried as I am about where this match is going to go, the story has been well done and I’m hoping that the match itself is as good as the buildup has been.

As for the winner, I’m going to do something probably not that bright and give Impact Wrestling the benefit of the doubt. I’ll take Blanchard for the win, because there is no reason whatsoever to go with Kim. She’s retired and not likely to wrestle again and Blanchard could be one of the biggest stars in the company very soon. Go with what makes sense instead of giving Kim another tribute that she doesn’t need.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Johnny Impact(c) vs. Brian Cage

Somehow this feud feels like the third (or arguably fourth) biggest match on the show and that’s not a good sign. I haven’t been a fan of this one since it started nearly four months ago and it hasn’t gotten much better. For some reason it just isn’t interesting and I don’t know how much better this match is going to make things. Their match at Homecoming was good, but I need something more to make me care than Impact suddenly turning heel.

I’ll go with Cage winning, because he’s been built up so much that he has to win the title at some point or there’s nowhere for him to go. Now hopefully that means that the story is done between these two, because there is no need for it to stretch on into the summer. The feud hasn’t been very interesting in months and Lance Storm as guest referee isn’t the cure. Cage wins, and I’ll try to make myself care.

Overall Thoughts

And that’s it. Seriously the show has five matches announced and we’re less than forty eight hours away. They’ve also announced a live Smoke Show from Scarlett Bordeaux which will likely set up a sixth match but egads man. How do you only have five matches set up when you had more than two months to get the show ready? I’m sure it will be fine (Impact pay per views always are) but we’re in for a mystery box show and that’s not the most thrilling.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 12, 2019
Location: St. Clair’s College, Windsor, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

We’re about two weeks away from Rebellion and you can see most of the card from here. That’s a good sign as you should be able to know what you’re getting this close to the pay per view and it’s looking pretty solid on paper. The problem is they rarely get beyond solid and it would be nice to move forward for a change. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Moose vs. Zachary Wentz

Wentz goes for a wristlock to start and Moose throws him around for the easy escape. A lot bridge puts Moose on the floor for an apron superkick and Wentz is actually able to muscle him back in. That’s not a good idea as it’s a running corner dropkick to put him down again and Moose sends Wentz flying. The referee does at least yell at Moose before he chokes away on the ropes a bit more.

The other Rascalz can only watch as it’s an apron bomb to knock Wentz even sillier. Moose throws him back in but stops to pose, allowing Wentz to hit a dive. Back in and some running knees in the corner rock Moose, setting up a springboard crossbody for two. A high crossbody (minus the springboard) is countered into a gorilla press toss over the top onto the other Rascalz. The spear finishes Wentz at 8:36.

Rating: C. This mini feud has been far more entertaining than it should be, though I’m not sure where it goes. Does Moose just beat all three of them and then move on to something else? That’s not the best usage of a rather talented team, though maybe they can come up with something else before Moose runs through them all.

Rob Van Dam is back full time.

Rob is glad to be back and hopes his magnetic waist still has it.

Madison Rayne isn’t letting her loss to Jordynne Grace get to her because the goal is the Knockouts Title. Tessa Blanchard comes in to say that the glory days are over. Madison brings up beating Tessa twice and is fine with doing it a third time.

Rosemary vs. Su Yung

Yung has her usual army of bridesmaids with her. Rosemary charges straight at her and hammers away as she continues to blame Su for the loss of Allie. The upside down triangle choke over the ropes has Yung in more trouble but she gets out and starts in on the knee. A dragon screw legwhip sends Rosemary down and it’s time to bring out the bloody glove.

That takes too long though and a reverse DDT puts both of them down. A German suplex doesn’t work on Yung so Rosemary spears her, drawing the bridesmaids up to the apron. Cue Kiera Hogan to go after them but Rosemary doesn’t want to hear it. The Bridesmaids jump her for the DQ at 5:30.

Rating: D+. This was more storyline based than anything else and that’s ok for the most part. It’s interesting that Yung is now being pushed at a stronger level than where she was when Allie was in her corner. The story can continue, though you could argue that it should have ended a long time ago.

Post match Hogan is forced to watch as Rosemary gets beaten down. Hogan gets a Panic Switch of her own.

Video on United We Stand. Tommy Dreamer thinks it feels like ECW. I know it’s not the same thing, but Impact surpassed the initial success of ECW a long time ago. That’s not the greatest compliment in the world. The wrestlers are fired up over making it such a success. I’d have to see a failure.

Ace Austin isn’t happy with Aiden Prince costing him the six way scramble last week and wants revenge.

GWN Flashback of the Week: Taylor Wilde vs. Angelina Love, I believe from No Surrender 2008.

Killer Kross talks to Willie Mack about….jazz music? Speaking of jazz, Rich Swann likes jazz and is playing Swann for a fool. Wouldn’t be shocking actually.

The Deaners are still coming.

North vs. Sheldon Jean/El Reverso

That would be Josh Alexander/Ethan Page. Alexander and Reverso start things off and it’s quickly off to Jean, who gets his arm cranked. Reverso comes back in and gets caught in an assisted spinning sitout DDT from Page. A spinning backbreaker keeps Reverso in trouble and a powerbomb backbreaker from Alexander makes it even worse. Reverso gets over for the tag to Sheldon, who comes in with a springboard clothesline. Alexander cuts him off at the knees though and it’s a series of strikes to Reverso’s head, setting up a reverse AA into a whip spinebuster for the pin at 5:25.

Rating: D+. The North (not a good name) looked nice enough together and some of their double teaming was rather impressive. That being said, they shouldn’t give up so much offense in their debut, let alone to two unknowns. I mean, his name is El Reverso. How much should he be getting in?

Gail Kim doesn’t want to hear Tessa talk.

The North is here to stay.

Madison Rayne vs. Tessa Blanchard

Gail is on commentary. Madison doesn’t like Tessa shoving her in the face to start so she gets in a kick to the ribs. A rope walk hurricanrana sends Tessa outside for a few seconds but she’s right back in for some dropkicks to the back. Tessa’s suplex makes it even worse and we hit the chinlock….as we look at Gail for the fourth time in less than three minutes. Madison gets caught in the corner for a Codebreaker and we take a break.

Back with Madison hitting some forearms and a dropkick as we look at Gail AGAIN. Tessa’s spinning full nelson faceplant gets two and a double slingshot suplex is good for the same. The frustration sets in as we look at Gail for the eighth time in about ten minutes. Tessa grabs a chair but Gail takes it away, allowing Madison to get a rollup pin at 13:57.

Rating: C. I knew the Gail Kim love would be strong and that’s what we got here with the ridiculous amount of cutting over to her. The story is good and has been well built up, but I’m scared that they’re going to give Gail the win instead of going with the move that makes sense. Madison was her usual self here, which is exactly the kind of thing they brought her back in to do.

Post match Tessa yells at commentary.

Eddie Edwards and Eli Drake ask the Lucha Bros for a Tag Team Title shot but LAX comes in for the double beatdown.

The Deaners are still coming.

Johnny Impact says someone as dumb as Brian Cage only comes around once every thousand years. Now he has a fan club in Jordynne Grace that he can do food prep with. Taya Valkyrie implies that Grace and Cage are sleeping together to get under Melissa Santos’ skin.

OVE calls Rich Swann a walking dumpster fire. Swann stabbed them in the back and at Rebellion, they’re taking the X-Division Title.

Tessa promises to make it personal with Gail.

Rob Van Dam is back soon.

Fallah Bahh can’t find KM so he goes into the women’s dressing room and finds Scarlett Bordeaux. She doesn’t mind and agrees to team with him next week.

Johnny Impact/Taya Valkyrie vs. Jordynne Grace/Brian Cage

Taya is willing to start with Cage but she gets run over by Grace to start instead. They trade whips into the corner with Grace hitting a Cannonball, sending Taya over for a tag. Johnny is good though and bails to the floor to avoid having to face Cage. We take a break and come back with Johnny backing off from Cage, who shrugs off a superkick.

The fall away slam sends Johnny down but the springboard corkscrew crossbody staggers Cage just a bit. One heck of a clothesline blasts Impact and a backdrop gets way more height than it should be able to. Johnny finally slides between the legs and dives over to Taya. A trip to Grace lets Taya take over with a Jeff Hardy legdrop between the legs for two. Taya cranks on the arm and a running hip attack keeps Grace in trouble. That just means a sitout powerbomb out of the corner to plant Taya and a roll into the corner allows the tag to Cage.

Rating: D+. It’s like they’ve run out of good ideas to keep this feud going so they’re going to the most basic booking tropes they can think of. The crooked referee isn’t one of my favorite stories and while it’s better than watching them have the same matches over and over, this feud needed to end about two months ago and it’s just going on and on.

Post match Cage gets beaten down so Impact and Taya can pose with the referee. Johnny kisses Taya to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Not their best show here as they’ve spent way too long on a lot of these stories and need something fresh. Impact has always had issues with making their main event stories seem epic and knowing when to end a feud, both of which are on full display here. It’s not a bad show by any stretch but it didn’t make me want to see Rebellion, which I’m often forgetting about in general. Just get to something fresh and make it more interesting.

Results

Moose b. Zachary Wentz – Spear

Rosemary b. Su Yung via DQ when the Undead Bridesmaids interfered

The North b. Sheldon Gene/El Reverso – Assisted whip spinebuster to Reverso

Madison Rayne b. Tessa Blanchard – Rollup

Johnny Impact/Taya Valkyrie b. Brian Cage/Jordynne Grace – Knee to Cage’s head

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: Wrestling Revolver

Pancakes And Piledrivers III
Date: April 6, 2019
Location: New York Hilton Midtown, New York City, New York
Commentators: Bork Torkelson, Don Callis

This is from Wrestling Revolves, where the idea is that you get something different every time. There’s a bonus in this show though as if you’re in the crowd, you get free pancakes. That alone should be more than enough to get people to show up but there’s also the whole wrestling thing on the side. Let’s get to it.

A rather ridiculous thirty minutes after the scheduled start time, we get a DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME message.

Opening sequence, with a song about the pancake robot coming to town.

The ring announcer introduces Jimmy Jacobs as our host….and he’s accompanied by the Rascalz dressed as pancakes. The Rascalz carry Jimmy around the ring and it’s time to throw out bags of swag. Jimmy explains that the hotel won’t allow them to give you pancakes so the Rascalz are the pancakes instead. They run off and I guess we’ll be seeing them later.

David Starr vs. Moose vs. Brian Cage

Starr, from Philadelphia, is billed from London and doesn’t get his monikers so he’s not happy. He has a card with the names listed, though Jacobs adds his own twists and the arguing continues. Moose and Cage stare each other down and Starr doesn’t like being left out. We get the MOOSE vs. the Terminator clap until Starr tries chopping both of them. Starr can’t slam or suplex either guy so they launch him into the air for a crash, leaving Cage to headscissor Moose.

An exchange of pump kicks goes nowhere but Starr manages to drop them both throat first over the rope. That means a double suicide dive and the brainbuster to the knee for two on Moose. Cage German suplexes both of them at the same time and an F5 gets two on Starr. Moose’s chokebomb out of the corner gets the same on Cage with Starr making a save of his own. A powerbomb backbreaker takes Starr down again and the Drill Claw makes it worse, only to have Moose throw Cage outside and steal the pin at 5:49.

Rating: D+. The story was simple enough and I’m surprised that they didn’t go with Starr getting the fluke win. Starr being in over his head was making me chuckle as he continues to be all over Wrestlemania weekend. I’m guessing the match ran short because of the crazy long delay to start the show, which really didn’t do the show any favors.

Tag Team Titles: Gauntlet Match

The Besties in the World (Davey Vega/Matt Fitchett, who come out to I Knew I Loved You by Savage Garden) are in first and Aussie Open are in second (out of six). Davey walks into a double flapjack to start and a backbreaker into a backsplash gets two. Everything breaks down and the Besties both get an abdominal stretch on Davis at the same time. Fletcher is right back with a standing Lionsault and it’s Vega getting chopped in the corner.

Davey finally gets in a kick to the face and makes the tag with Fitchett hitting a high crossbody for two on Fletcher. A running knee gets the same but it’s Davis coming back in to clean house. Davis picks Vega up for a jumping cutter from Fletcher but a running kick to the face finishes Davis at 7:40.

The Rascalz (Zachary Wentz/Dezmond Xavier this time around) are in third and the Besties are right there to slow them down, including a backflip kick to the head on the apron. Not that it matters as Vega is run over and the shoving moonsault gives Wentz the pin at 9:35. The Lucha Bros are in fourth and it’s a quick exchange of superkicks with the Bros getting the best of things. Wentz gets kicked down and a double superkick makes it even worse. The wheelbarrow splash gets two on Xavier and the Pentagon Driver gets rid of the Rascalz at 12:30.

Hang on though as the Rascalz jump the Bros as LAX (defending champions) is in fifth. The four of them beat the Bros down but LAX superkicks the Rascalz and pin the Bros at 15:36. Team Tremendous (Bill Carr/Dan Barry) are in last with LAX right there to jump them. Barry is right back up for an Asai moonsault onto both of them, followed by a running flip dive from the bigger Carr.

They get inside with Ortiz kicking Barry away and it’s off to Santana vs. Carr. A big clothesline gives Carr two but everything breaks down. Santana superkicks Barry into a cutter for two with Carr making the save. The Street Sweeper is broken up and it’s an electric chair Sliced Bread to finish Ortiz for the titles at 20:54.

Rating: C-. As usual in a gauntlet match, the fast falls didn’t help things but at least they had a surprise ending with what seems to be a fun team winning the titles. There were some awesome teams in there and I really wish we could have seen some of them have some longer segments, but there’s not exactly time for something like that. Not bad, but pretty disappointing.

AR Fox vs. Sammy Guevara vs. Ace Austin vs. JT Dunn

Austin fires off kicks from the apron until Fox gets in a kick of his own. Guevara and Dunn chop it out with Sammy hitting Feast Your Eyes for two. Dunn sends Austin outside and hits a rolling cutter for two on Guevara. Austin throws Guevara into the air for a cutter but Dunn makes the save to put everyone down. Dunn’s rollup with tights gets two on Fox so Fox hits a springboard Downward Spiral to plant Dunn for the same. Ace is back in with a top rope spinning Fameasser for two on Sammy as Fox makes another save. Dunn’s Death By Elbow (discus elbow) finishes Fox at 8:52.

Rating: C+. This was a lot of fun with everyone moving as fast as they could. They weren’t going for anything more than one spot after another and that’s a perfectly good decision in a match like this. Dunn and Austin looked good here, though I’m not sure what the point of the Skulls was. They just came and went and didn’t change anything, so why even have them out there in the first place?

Open Invite Scramble Title: Caleb Konley vs. Jake Manning vs. Ian Maxwell vs. Daga vs. Lance Anao’i vs. Mance Warner vs. Arik Cannon vs. Trey Miguel vs. Jon Skyler vs. Shigehiro Irie vs. Clayton Gaines vs. KTB

Konley is defending and this is one fall to a finish. Daga and Miguel go nuts by hiptossing everyone until the referee hiptosses Miguel for a change. Warner comes back in but gets crotches by KTB, leaving Daga to come off the top with a Meteora to make KTB DDT Mance. Lance superkicks Skyler, who hits a double superkick along with Gaines. Daga runs the ropes to headscissor Maxwell and wristdrag KTB at the same time.

Irie comes in and gets to run everyone over but it’s Mance coming back in to offer Cannon a beer. Gaines comes back in with his energy drink and gets beer spat in his face, though he’s fine enough to clothesline Warner and Cannon down. Konley remembers he’s in the match and powerbombs Maxwell onto the pile but Skyler cuts him down with a slingshot spear. Maxwell and Miguel hit their own running dives, followed by one from KTB off the top.

Back in and Miguel hits a 619 on Maxwell but Manning cuts him off with a backbreaker into a Downward Spiral. Daga comes back in to beat up Gaines and it’s time for Warner to put Skyler on top. That’s not the best idea as it’s a super Regal Roll to drop Warner with Lance coming off the top with a Superfly Splash. Konley and Irie get their turn now with Konley not being able to get a sunset flip.

Irie manages to piledrive Cannon onto Konley, leaving Lance and Miguel to go Coast to Coast at the same time. Hang on though as Manning, the Manscout, needs to bring in a tent. Skyler knocks Manning into the tent but he’s right back up for the Tower of Doom to drive a bunch of people through the tent. Konley rolls Maxwell up to retain the title at 14:38.

Rating: D. I get the idea here but it’s too long and messy to really work. Cut it down to six or so and this would have worked far better than the dozen wrestlers in there at once. It’s a bunch of spots, many of which weren’t all that great in the first place. This definitely wasn’t a terrible match but the concept didn’t work with this many people involved at once.

Jacobs thanks the fans for being so awesome and makes fun of Callis.

Adam Brooks vs. Matt Cross

Cross is better known as Son of Havoc from Lucha Underground. Brooks is replacing Sonjay Dutt for some reason. Brooks gets aggressive to start and catches a running Cross in a Downward Spiral into the buckle. An elbow to the face stops Brooks and there’s the first suicide dive.

Back in and Cross misses a top rope double stomp, allowing Brooks to hit a Backpack Stunner. A double stomp to the ribs works better for Cross but Brooks catches him in a fireman’s carry facebuster. That sends Cross outside for a suicide dive into a sloppy tornado DDT but he’s fine enough to dropkick Brooks down. The shooting star press finishes Brooks at 4:39.

Rating: C-. It was nice to have a singles match for once, though they went through it so fast that it didn’t exactly have a lot of impact. The energy was there though and that helped keep the show going well enough. I could have gone for more of this and that’s about as good of an endorsement as you can have.

Jacobs decides the next match will be for the X-Division Title. Bork: “Can he do that?” Callis: “No.”

X-Division Title: Chuck Mambo vs. Rich Swann

Mambo is “gnarliest wrestler in the world” and seems to like beach balls. Swann, now without facial hair, has Jason Cade of the Crew faction with him. Mambo takes him down by the arm to start before sending Swann into the corner, meaning it’s time to dance. A wristlock makes Swann scream until he bounces out of it as the pace picks up. An inverted Gory Stretch has Swann in more trouble but a Cade distraction lets him slip out. Mambo gets dropkicked out of the air. The stepover kick to the face gives Swann two but Mambo explodes with chops and punches to the chest.

A Blockbuster drops Swann and a springboard Meteora gets two. Mambo gets hurricanranaed off the top but he’s fine enough to superkick Swann to the floor. That means a double jump springboard flip dive onto Swann and Cade for the big spot of the match. Back in and Swann’s Lethal Injection gets two but a second attempt is countered into a Backstabber. Cade breaks up a cover off the springboard splash, which isn’t an ejection for some reason. Mambo chases him inside and gets rolled up for the pin at 10:38.

Rating: C. Mambo’s gimmick was a little goofy but once he got into the actual wrestling, he wasn’t bad at all and the match was pretty good. Swann looks so strange without his goatee but at least he can still have a good match. I could go for more of Mambo and that’s a big reason to watch these shows: you never know who you might see for the first *time.

Ace Romero vs. Fallah Bahh vs. Larry D. vs. Dan Maff vs. Madman Fulton vs. Jacob Fatu vs. Jessika Havoc

Havoc is a surprise surprise entrant and aside from her, Fulton is the smallest at 305lbs. Everyone goes after her and it’s a six way crush to send her outside. Larry powerbombs Fatu and catches Maff’s crossbody until Fulton kicks them both down. Fulton slams Bahh but Romero takes both of them down. Havoc slams the 385lb Romero but Bahh gives her a Banzai Drop with Fulton having to make a save. Fatu superkicks Maff, only to miss the handspring moonsault.

Romero goes to the middle rope for no logical reason, allowing Fulton to hit a Regal Roll but he dives into a Samoan drop from Bahh. With everyone else on the floor, Havok hits a suicide dive but Fatu drives over the top to take all of them out in a more impressive landing. Back in and Maff’s Burning Hammer gets two on Havok with Romero making a save and then diving onto Maff. Fatu moonsaults Havok for the pin at 5:43.

Rating: D+. There were some impressive spots in there and they were very smart to keep it short. If you have these bigger wrestlers going too long, it’s going to get lethargic and sloppy so going with the quick form was certainly the right call. Havoc and Romero were impressive, though I still don’t know how WWE didn’t see the potential in Fulton.

Tessa Blanchard vs. Ricky Shane Page

I’ve never seen Page wrestle but he has some size and smiles a lot. They stall a lot with Tessa not shaking his hand and then slapping him in the face. The lockup finally starts after two minutes, followed by Tessa hitting a good looking tornado DDT. A dropkick to the back of the head has Page in more trouble so he slaps Tessa into the corner. That ticks Tessa off and she unloads with forearms before taking it outside to beat Page up against the barricade.

Page blasts her with an overhand chop but she jumps to the apron to kick Page in the face. A hard suicide dive sends Page into the barricade and Tessa plants him with an impressive Samoan drop. Page shoves her away and hits a splash but gets caught in another tornado DDT for two. Back up and a top rope superplex drops Tessa and a chokebreaker gets two more. Tessa gets taken up top again but counters into a super Canadian Destroyer….for two. Magnum and the Buzzsaw DDT finish Page at 13:26.

Rating: C-. This was longer than it needed to be and the kickout of the Destroyer was ridiculous. If you’re going to finish the match thirty seconds later, why even have the kickout in the first place? Tessa winning is hardly a surprise as she’s one of the best female wrestlers in the world right now and Page is just a big guy who didn’t do anything special here.

Jacobs introduces us to a dog named Nami and tells us to come see her at the Wrestling Revolver booth.

OVE vs. Unwanted

OVE has a loud manager named JT Davidson. The Unwanted is Shane Strickland/Joe Gacy/Eddie Kingston (with Colby Corino) and this is Shane’s final independent match. OVE isn’t having this big entrance and the fight is on in a hurry. We settle down to Eddie STOing Dave but taking a neckbreaker from Jake. Strickland comes in for his anklescissors into a dropkick and a running dropkick to the knee.

Now it’s Sami coming in for the staredown and he doesn’t understand why Shane won’t shake hands after Sami spit on it. Instead it’s a kick to the face but Sami forearms Shane out to the floor. Sami goes outside as well and it’s Gacy diving onto all of them, followed by Dave hitting a dive into a tornado DDT. Colby tries a dive of his own but gets superplexed onto the pile. Not to be outdone, Davidson hits his own flip dive and the referee adds a non-flip dive.

Back in and it’s the Tower of Doom as they’re getting through all of the six man spots in a hurry. Shane nails his snap German suplex on Dave, followed by the rolling cutter. The Cactus Piledriver gives Sami two on Shane and Jake’s cutter gets the same (just a regular cutter as he couldn’t hit the jumping version). With everyone else going to the floor, Sami spits at Shane, who spits right back. Shane snaps the arm back and the Swerve Stomp connects for the pin at 10:32.

Rating: B-. This felt rushed, which is probably the case as they seemed to want to be out by the top of the hour and had to hurry to get done on time. Strickland is going to be a heck of a talent in WWE due to how smooth he can be in the ring. Callihan was his usual vile self and the Crists were every bit as awesome as usual. Gacy didn’t show me much and Kingston was the same brawler he’s been for years, meaning your mileage may vary.

Post match Sami hugs Strickland. The announcers sign off but Sami grabs the mic and says he quit WWE for reasons like this. Sami saw something in him when no one else did and now it’s time for Shane to be the leader of this generation. Shane thanks the locker room because they’re his brothers. It took him ten years to get here and his first WrestleCon was in New York/New Jersey and now he’s leaving here as well. Strickland talks about wrestling in England, where everything just clicked and the confidence started coming in.

That’s where Swerve started to come together and what he wanted to show everyone: confidence. He was in the military as a teenage and had two kids when he was nineteen. Wrestling was in his heart then and it’s in his heart now because he’s traveled the world and met people everywhere. Have confidence in yourself and there is swerve in all of you. Awesome speech and Strickland could be a star in NXT.

Overall Rating: D+. I wasn’t feeling this one as there was just too much stuff going on to make it work. There were too many multi-man matches and trying to cram in as many people as you could. The wrestling was hit or miss, mainly because there wasn’t enough of a chance for anyone to stand out among everyone else. For a wild mess of a show it was passable, but it’s nothing that I’d want to watch again.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 15, 2019
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

Things are rolling along as usual around here, which means a lot of the same stories that kind of need to go somewhere already. That’s one of Impact’s biggest problems and it’s been the case for years: they don’t seem to know how wrap up stories so things just keep going on and on for months. Hopefully we get some advancement soon because the good things that they have are rapidly approaching their expiration date. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Standard opening recap.

Opening sequence.

OVE vs. Rich Swann/Willie Mack/Tommy Dreamer

Yes seriously. It’s a brawl to start with Swann and Callihan being left in the ring until Rich kicks him to the floor. The good guys are left inside until it’s Dreamer and Sami starting things off, allowing Callis to talk about Dreamer sticking his nose into everything. Preach it man. Mack comes in to work on Jake’s arm and Dreamer adds a bottom rope ax handle. Dave takes over on Dreamer and it’s off to Sami for an elbow drop.

The Cactus Piledriver is countered though and it’s a catapult to send Sami into the corner. Mack comes back in for a powerslam and the standing moonsault, followed by a nip up. Dreamer drops an elbow and does his version of a nip up (it’s funny because he’s old and fat), leaving Mack and Swann to do their dives.

Instead of diving, Dreamer runs to the apron and climbs down for some right hands (it’s funny because he’s old and fat if you didn’t get the same joke a minute ago). Back from a break with Swann fighting out of Sami’s chinlock but getting caught in Jake’s reverse Rings of Saturn.

With that broken up, Dave works on the leg until a kick to the head lets Dreamer get the hot tag. Sami comes in to spit in Dreamer’s face as everything breaks down. Dreamer knocks all three of them into a corner for a running cannonball from Mack, and it’s stereo frog splashes onto the Crists. Tommy even hits his own splash onto Sami (BECAUSE HE’S OLD AND FAT!) but Callihan pops up and hits the Cactus Piledriver for the pin at 19:03.

Rating: C-. So now the heel commentator’s line is “Dreamer needs to go away because he keeps stealing spots from people”? Why would I disagree with that? Is is because Dreamer is a legend who won’t go away? Or is it because he’s old and fat and makes fun of being old and fat? It’s not funny but you can’t make fun of Dreamer because he was in ECW or something.

Brian Cage asks Johnny Impact, in a neck brace, if he’s ready for tonight. Johnny says he’ll be there. The swerve is strong with this one.

Video on Impact vs. Cage, with the title on the line tonight.

The Rascalz are in their circle when Moose joins them and wonders what’s up with Melissa Santos. Moose punches them all for making fun of his clothes.

Here’s Glenn Gilbertti to call out Scarlett Bordeaux, who he fights next week. Instead he gets a clown.

Glenn Gilbertti vs. Kikutaro

He’s a Japanese comedy guy in a mask. They fight over arm control to start with Kikutaro stopping to dance. Some shoulders don’t work so Glenn punches him down and whips Kikutaro across the ring over and over. The chinlock goes on for all of two seconds so Glenn slams him down but misses the Village People’s Elbow (with a YMCA dance). Kikutaro hits part of a Shining Wizard but a missed moonsault lets Glenn hit the Chartbuster (Stunner) for the pin at 4:23.

Rating: D. It’s kind of hard to complain that much about this story as it’s mostly harmless and isn’t getting a ton of time. Scarlett is going to beat Gilbertti up and the fans will be happy while no one of value takes a loss. They’re giving the story about five minutes a week and that’s all they need to do. In other words, this was harmless.

Taya Valkyrie isn’t worried about defending the Knockouts Title because her husband is in danger tonight.

Reno Scum vs. KM/Fallah Bahh

Rematch from a few weeks ago when Scum lost but beat them up after the match. It’s a brawl on the floor to start with Scum taking over and sending Bahh into the steps. KM gets punched in the corner until an enziguri drops Luster. There’s no Bahh though, meaning KM has to clothesline Thornstowe down before making the real hot tag. The Samoan drop gets two on Thornstowe, followed by Luster going shoulder first into the post. That’s enough for Bahh to hit a belly to belly for the pin on Thornstowe at 4:32.

Rating: D. Another nothing match but that’s the best way to use Scum. They’re just loud and obnoxious which isn’t enough to make me want to see them stick around. I don’t say this often but KM and Bahh deserve better than this. Hopefully this was just for the Las Vegas tapings as I really don’t want Scum around regularly.

Konnan asks the Lucha Bros when they’re giving LAX their rematch. That’s not happening so Konnan threatens them as they leave.

Post break Konnan tells them that there’s no rematch yet. LAX doesn’t seem worried because it’s going to be a street fight.

Tessa Blanchard vs. Jordynne Grace

#1 contenders match. Tessa can’t do much with the power to start so Jordynne runs her over with a clothesline. The threat of a splash in the corner makes Tessa pull the referee in front of her, meaning it’s a hard forearm to Jordynne’s face. The hanging Downward Spiral is countered but Tessa grabs the Codebreaker for two instead. That kickout doesn’t sit well with Tessa so she hammers away but walks into a spinebuster.

Back from a break with Tessa unloading with forearms until a Michinoku Driver gets Jordynne out of trouble. A Muscle Buster is broken up and Tessa hits some kind of a swinging reverse DDT. Tessa goes up but spends too much time talking about Gail Kim, allowing Grace to slam her down. An elbow to the face staggers Jordynne but she’s right back with the Grace Driver (pumphandle driver) for the pin at 10:21.

Rating: C. Nice power match here, even if we’re just killing time until Kim vs. Blanchard. I mean, you have to give them time to set up the 194 video packages on how legendary and amazing Kim really is. Grace going after the title could be interesting as you can only have a monster like her in the midcard for so long.

Tessa sells the heck out of the driver and barely moves. After she finally gets up, Tessa snaps, yells about Kim some more and beats up the timekeeper. Gail Kim comes in for the save and clears the ring.

United We Stand ad.

Tessa yells at Scott D’Amore and demands something be done about Gail. Speaking of Gail, she comes in and yells as well, earning herself a suspension. This story really doesn’t warrant such a long build.

United We Stand rundown.

GWN Flashback Of The Week: Brian Cage vs. Eli Drake from last year’s Lucha Underground vs. Impact show.

Rosemary tries to get inside Allie’s head and find the Bunny. Allie says it’s gone and laughs because Rosemary looks pathetic. Rosemary: “WHERE’S THE BUNNY?” This is more interesting, even though we had to sit through all those losses for Allie and company.

Callihan yells about Swann turning his back on OVE. Now he’s going to take everything from Swann, starting with the X-Division Title next week.

Desi Hit Squad vs. Eddie Edwards/Eli Drake

Eddie and Raj start things off and trade some right hands before it’s off to both partners. It’s already back to Edwards to chop Raju, who brings Raj back in for a flapjack into a sliding knee from Raju. A jumping Downward Spiral gets two and Eli gets knocked off the apron. That’s too much for him so he comes in sans tag to beat up the Squad, which amazingly enough isn’t all that hard. Gama Singh gets on the apron for a distraction so Drake throws in Kenny, allowing Eddie to knock Raju cold for the pin at 5:21.

Rating: D+. The Hit Squad is less annoying than they used to be but they’re still not an act that I want to watch every week. Drake and Edwards are fine as a team and Drake getting a tweener push is rather interesting for a change. He’s still one of the best talkers in the company and it’s a good idea to see him getting this kind of a chance. Throw in the eternally good Edwards and they might have something here.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Johnny Impact vs. Brian Cage

Overall Rating: D+. The main event angle was nice and FINALLY advanced the story somewhat, though the rest of the show left a lot to be desired. You can only get so far with doing the same stuff over and over, but for some reason Impact is fine with spinning their wheels on stories for months at a time. There’s a long way to go before Rebellion but you can at least see the card being set up. As usual: some good stuff here and there, just not enough that makes you want to come back.

Results

OVE b. Tommy Dreamer/Rich Swann/Willie Mack – Cactus Piledriver to Dreamer

Glenn Gilbertti b. Kikutaro – Chartbuster

KM/Fallah Bahh b. Reno Scum – Belly to belly to Thornstowe

Jordynne Grace b. Tessa Blanchard – Grace Driver

Eli Drake/Eddie Edwards b. Desi Hit Squad – Kendo stick to Raju

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 1, 2019
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

The Las Vegas swing continues as we continue to build towards Rebellion. The big story coming out of last week was LAX seemingly turning heel by attacking and unmasking the Lucha Bros, though LAX was provoked. Other than that it’s the same World Title scene we’ve had for months now as Brian Cage is chasing the title with Moose and Killer Kross running around too. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Standard opening recap, meaning it’s well done.

Opening sequence.

Willie Mack vs. Jake Crist

Dave Crist is in Jake’s corner. Mack isn’t wasting time and Thesz presses Jake for some right hands. A swinging slam gets two as the fans are behind Chocolate Thunder. Jake sends him outside for a suicide dive, a flip dive and a diving tornado DDT for a good looking trio. Back in and Jake’s high crossbody is countered into a Samoan drop with a standing moonsault getting two. The Codebreaker connects but Dave shoves Mack off the top for the DQ at 3:23.

Rating: C. It was exciting while it lasted but you can only get so much out of a three minute match that existed to set up an angle. There’s something so engaging about Mack and that was on display here. The Crists are both very talented as well and they got to show it off in the limited ring time here.

Post match Tommy Dreamer (egads) comes out, saying he’s spent thirty years trying to write the wrongs of pro wrestling (Fan: “THEN WHY ARE YOU STILL WRESTLING?”). The match is on after the break.

Tommy Dreamer/Willie Mack vs. Crist Brothers

Tommy goes straight to the food from the crowd as we head inside for the opening bell. Some double elbows and a jumping legdrop get two on Jake and it’s time to start in on the arm. A blind tag lets Dave come in and it’s a top rope backsplash to Dreamer’s eternally injured back. The chinlock lasts even shorter than usual so Dreamer fails at a sunset flip attempt to keep himself in trouble.

An enziguri gives Jake two and it’s off to another quickly broken chinlock. With the holds not working, Jake goes up and gets superplexed right back down. Mack comes in to pick up the pace and the Stunner sends Jake outside. That leaves Dave to take a Death Valley Driver into the frog splash from Mack for the pin at 6:46.

Rating: D+. Dreamer comes in, does his Dreamer thing, and leaves. I’m glad Mack got a win, though you would think there would be a better choice to pair him with than Dreamer. At least he didn’t pin one of the Crists, even if he’s someone who doesn’t exactly offer much in terms of value, mainly due to him always being around in so many promotions.

Johnny Impact doesn’t like the implication that he’s handing out title matches as favors. The only reason Brian cage hasn’t gotten a title shot is the interference from Killer Kross and Moose. Just get rid of them and the title match is there.

KM/Fallah Bahh vs. Reno Scum

I didn’t get Scum back then and I don’t get them now. Adam Thornstone tries to slam Bahh for some reason and the pain is on in a hurry. KM comes in for some elbows in the corner but gets taken into the other corner so the beating can begin. A standing legdrop gets KM out of trouble and it’s back to Bahh for a running crossbody. Back to back rolls crush Luster and it’s a Rocket Launcher into a Samoan drop to finish Thornstone at 4:36.

Rating: D. Yeah I still don’t get them. Scum are two guys with an uninteresting look who don’t do anything in the ring that sets them apart. I’m not a fan of KM and Bahh either but they’re certainly better than what Scum was doing. They’re not a good team and I’m not sure why Impact brought them back in.

Post match Scum beats them up to try and get some heat.

Glenn Gilbertti annoys Ethan Page and runs into producer D’Lo Brown. He finally gets into the creative office and thinks we should have an X-Division tournament. The unseen creative laughs at him instead and sends him off for coffee. Gilbertti: “I’ve booked with Vince before!” Voice: “Wrong Vince!” I get the joke and laughter isn’t coming.

KM and Bahh want revenge.

United We Stand rundown.

GWN Flashback Moment of the Week: LAX defends the Tag Team Titles against Killshot/The Mack at Impact vs. Lucha Underground from last April.

Eli Drake congratulates Eddie Edwards on his win but says he won too. It was Eli drawing out the old Eddie last week and Eddie got a win. They can win the Tag Team Titles together but Eddie is fine with Kenny as his partner.

Scarlett Bordeaux’s in-ring debut is next week.

Tessa Blanchard vs. Delilah Doom

Fallout from Tessa attacking Delilah last week. It’s a fight to start with Doom hammering away and hurricanranaing her down. A top rope armdrag does it again but Tessa counters another hurricanrana into a sitout powerbomb. Tessa’s Saito suplex gets a delayed two as she’s not exactly intimidated here. A running elbow to the back misses though and Doom scores with a 619. Doom gets two off a crucifix bomb but Tessa powers her up and gets the Buzzsaw DDT for the pin at 5:00.

Rating: C-. This was a nicely done story with Tessa breaking a bit of a sweat against the newcomer, who got to show off a little bit here. There wasn’t much of a doubt here but at least they tried to make you believe that Doom could pull off the upset. Tessa is gearing up for her big showdown with Gail Kim though, which may or may not be the best idea.

Tessa says she’s getting her rematch for the title or else.

Cage says he can team with Impact if the World Title is the prize.

Rosemary is excited about the challenge for the war and tells Kiera Hogan to stay out of it. Kiera isn’t happy with that suggestion so Rosemary agrees to let her fight. But once Allie is back, they’re done.

Ethan Page vs. Zachary Wentz

Wentz flips out of a very early wristlock and Page isn’t sure what to do with this kind of speed. A handspring elbow is countered into something close to an F5 and a tilt-a-whirl faceplant gives Page two. The chinlock goes on so Wentz comes back with an enziguri into a shooting star for two of his own. Wentz’s dive is countered into a butterfly backbreaker of all things but Page stops to yell at the NFL alumni and gets in a shoving match with one of them. With Page distracted, Wentz hits a big springboard dive, followed by a springboard cutter for the pin at 4:55.

Rating: C. Match of the night so far though that’s not saying much. Wentz and the rest of the Rascalz are a fun team to watch and can have entertaining matches with anyone. Page isn’t bad either as I’m digging his stuff more often than not and this was no exception. Doing something with the NFL people is fine for a short story and I can’t imagine it’s going to be more than that.

Gilbertti talks to Dreamer and says he was hired as the new suckup. They find the Anthem owl and Dreamer throws him into a room with the thing. Gilbertti comes out and spits feathers.

Ace Austin is coming next week.

We recap Rich Swann vs. Sami Callihan, who were friends back in the day but now Swann wants nothing to do with him, including joining OVE. That’s not cool with Sami, who wants to be paid back by corrupting Swann like he does to everyone else.

Moose and Kross agree to work together. How many times have we heard something like this? Moose: “Tick friggin tock.”

LAX says they treated the Lucha Bros like they would treat anyone else that disrespects them. Konnan freaks out and says that’s not what he wanted so next week he’ll handle things. LAX better not screw it up.

Preview of next week’s show.

Moose/Killer Kross vs. Johnny Impact/Brian Cage

Kross and Cage slug it out to start with Cage picking him up for a backbreaker. Impact slingshots in with a legdrop and punches Kross into a corner for the tag off to Moose. That goes badly for Moose as well as he gets sent into the corner for some running elbows. A superkick into a gutwrench suplex sends Kross flying and we take a break.

Back with Moose’s rake of the eyes allowing the tag to Kross, who gets kicked in the face. The apron superplex sets up Impact’s breakdancing legdrop but Johnny stays on the mat, holding his neck. He’s fine enough to crawl over to Cage for the tag and it’s a spinebuster to plant Kross. Cage fights away but gets kicked out to the floor and here are the referees to check on Impact.

It’s enough of a distraction for Kross to hit Cage with the belt to bust him open. Back in and Moose hammers on the cut before dropping the backsplash for no cover. The bloody Cage gets pulled back to the corner as Johnny is checked on the floor. Cage and Moose trade clotheslines and Cage manages an F5 to Kross. Cue Taya Valkyrie to check on her husband as the Krossjacket Choke with a spear are enough to knock Cage out at 14:50.

Rating: C+. Again more storytelling than wrestling here, but the problem is how late they’ve waited to get to something interesting in the story. This feels like an Impact heel turn as Cage trusted him when he shouldn’t have and it allows Impact to avoid facing Cage again. Not a bad match at all though and it advanced the story, which was the point.

Impact is carried out and Cage is unconscious to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This ranged from pretty lame to fine and that’s about what I’ve grown to expect from the regular shows around here. Some of the stories are moderately interesting but there’s not enough to make me want to see the show week to week. I would say there’s been more good than bad though and the big bad hasn’t been there, so at least things are stable instead of all over the place. In this case, that’s a great relief.

Results

Willie Mack b. Jake Crist via DQ when Dave Crist interfered

Tommy Dreamer/Willie Mack b. Crist Brothers – Frog splash to Dave

KM/Fallah Bahh b. Reno Scum – Rocket Launcher into a Samoan drop to Thornstone

Tessa Blanchard b. Delilah Doom – Buzzsaw DDT

Zachary Wentz b. Ethan Page – Springboard cutter

Killer Kross/Moose b. Johnny Impact/Brian Cage – Krossjacket Choke to Cage

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 22, 2019
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

We’re on to Las Vegas now after a pretty good run down in Mexico. The question now is where we go from here as the road to….is it the New York show or the April pay per view now? Either way the main event scene isn’t likely to be great, which has been the problem for far too long now. At least we can get the Tag Team Title stuff going again though, which has been great every time. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Uncaged, which was one of their better shows in a while.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Johnny Impact for a chat. He said he’d be a fighting champion and he has been, then he said he’d retain the World Title last week and he did that too. Last week he did everything he said he would and beat three people, so it’s time to move on. This brings out Moose, who seems to disagree. Moose doesn’t want to hear this crying because other people cost him the World Title last week. Cue Killer Kross to say he hates Moose and his outfits. The clothing is too far as Moose gets in Kross’ face. Impact decides that that they can have a match right now for the #1 contendership. Here’s a referee and we’re ready to go.

Killer Kross vs. Moose

Impact is on commentary. Kross shoulders Moose down but Moose nips up so it’s a running clothesline in the corner to actually do some damage. Moose gets two off a rollup and yells at the referee, allowing Kross to score with a low blow. They fight to the floor where Kross throws coffee in Impact’s face, leaving Moose to kick the champ in the jaw. That’s enough to draw Johnny inside to jump both of them for the no contest at 4:10, though he hit Moose first so that should be a DQ. It won’t be, but it should be.

Rating: D+. This was an angle instead of a match, though I’m getting really tired of the whole No Contest that should be a DQ finish. It’s as basic of a wrestling rule as you can get but it’s ignored because this is the only thing they can think of. Have Moose and Cage beat on Johnny and have the referee throw it out or something, but stop making this stuff up as you go.

Post match Brian Cage comes in for the save.

Announcers. Preview.

Don Callis has hired Glenn Gilbertti (Disco Inferno) for the Las Vegas shows. I smell unfunny comedy.

Konnan fires up LAX.

Impact thanks Cage but says he can’t have a title shot with those tow running around. They should team up to get rid of Moose and Kross but Cage doesn’t trust him. Impact has a contract though and Cage seems interested.

GWN Flashback Moment of the Week: the six man interpromotional match from the Impact vs. Lucha Underground WrestleCon show. That’s certainly different.

The Rascalz are in their circle when Gama Singh comes in to say they can’t beat the Desi Hit Squad. Drugs are exchanged and they can’t keep up with Gama. Uh, Gama is a heel right?

Reno Scumm is coming back.

Desi Hit Squad vs. Rascalz

The Rascalz (Trey Miguel/Dezmond Xavier here) aren’t themselves after the previous segment. Raj rolls Dezmond up for a very fast two and the villains take over in the corner. Xavier gets in a dropkick but Trey is too high to tag. Instead he gets tagged in and starts the kicks with no issues, because the Rascalz are a weird team. Everything breaks down and the Squad’s wheelbarrow DDT combination gets two on Miguel. Not that it matters though as the Rascalz hit a double 619 in the corner, setting up Trey’s top rope Meteora for the pin at 6:13.

Rating: C-. I guess the good Desi match was a one off because this was nothing all that noteworthy. The Rascalz are still a good team and they have more than enough time to be advanced somewhere else. Right now they’re just being put out there as the fun act and there’s nothing wrong with doing that for a long time.

Eli Drake says the Book of Eli says don’t raise your hand to him, which is what Eddie Edwards did last week. He’s coming down on Eddie for not listening to him and tonight, he’ll show Eddie the way. Hardcore wrestling makes you a loser and no one can stop him.

Sami Callihan comes in to see the injured Rich Swann. The beatdown last week was out of love because Rich’s big brother is here. Callihan called Swann from Japan when Swann needed him because Swann is the most talented person Sami has ever met. A nurse comes in to say Callihan has to leave because this is family only. Callihan leaves and Swann looks confused.

Eli Drake vs. Eddie Edwards

Drake hides on the floor from the threat of Kenny the kendo stick for a long time (smart) before we’re finally ready to go. An early shoulder has Eddie in the corner though he seems more happy than anything else. Eddie is right back up with a hiptoss and armdrags because he can do the wrestling when he wants, as opposed to when Drake wants. Drake gets sent outside and Eddie crotches him against the post for the funny visual. Instead of covering though, Eddie has a seat on the ramp for a few moments.

Back in and Eddie ducks his head, allowing Drake to hit a running DDT but the middle rope elbow misses. Drake tries a Lionsault of all things but crash lands, allowing Eddie to hit the backpack Stunner for two. A Blue Thunder Bomb gets the same but the Boston Knee Party is countered into the Gravy Train which is countered into a rollup to give Eddie two.

Rating: B-. I like the idea of this feud and they’re getting into some more complicated stuff with it. Eddie wanting to be crazy and violent but allowing himself to go back to his roots (which are still inside him) is an interesting story and I’m wondering where it’s going. Drake getting to talk is a very good thing and the more of it we get to see, the better.

Tessa Blanchard isn’t getting a rematch for the Knockouts Title and blames Gail Kim. Impact management can’t protect Gail forever though and Tessa will get to her one way or another.

Gilbertti can’t get inside.

Alisha Edwards vs. Delilah Doom

Post match Doom goes after Tessa and gets Batista Bombed for her efforts. The Buzzsaw DDT makes it even worse.

Ace Austin is coming. Cool.

Doom wants to fight Tessa next week.

Impact is partnering with the NFL Alumni Association for some charity work. Nothing wrong with that.

James Mitchell comes in to see Allie, Su Yung and an Undead Bridesmaid. He’s here to offer a deal: Su’s dark army against his own. If Su wins, she gets Allie free and clear (Doesn’t she already have that?) but if Mitchell’s team wins, they (not sure who he’s with, though it’s likely Rosemary) gets Su.

Taya Valkyrie thinks Tessa whining is funny. Tessa can cry like a baby all she wants but Taya isn’t helping her.

Tag Team Titles: LAX vs. Lucha Bros

Rating: B. These four can do now wrong, even if it’s with a shorter form match like this one. They beat each other up with one big spot after another and it’s nice that they didn’t spam the moves as much this time. LAX will be back later on due to pure talent but it makes more sense to go with the Lucha Bros right now as they’re just that good.

Post match Konnan congratulates the champs and tells LAX to do the same. LAX offers the handshakes but get taunted instead, meaning it’s a beatdown and unmasking to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. There’s more than enough good wrestling to carry a show on here and that’s what matters most. The storytelling is still a weakness, but if they focus more on the action than on the stories, they can have a way forward. Now unfortunately that kind of a show doesn’t have the best track record, but I’d rather they do something well than do something weak over and over.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 11, 2019
Location: The Asylum, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

We’re now on the Pursuit Channel, which seems to be in pursuit of an audience. It’s also the fallout show from Homecoming, which saw Killer Kross attack Johnny Impact and Johnny’s wife Taya Valkyrie to end the show. Other than that it wasn’t exactly an eventful night, though it was a pretty good show. We’re also on Twitch now, which at least lets me watch the show live. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with the expected recap of Homecoming, which was quite a good show.

Opening sequence.

Here’s World Champion Johnny Impact to open things up. Johnny says the title is important but what matters a lot more is his wife being hurt. He wants Kross out here right not but gets Brian Cage, who says he’s the rightful champion. It took Johnny’s Survivor buddies to save the title so the rematch needs to happen RIGHT NOW.

Impact gets cut off by more demands but here’s Kross to interrupt. Kross calls Johnny the great impostor and talks about Cage having Johnny pinned for a ten count, or three pins. More threats to Taya are enough to have Johnny superkick Cage and dive on Kross. Cage breaks that up and takes Johnny down until Kross suplexes him. That’s no sold and a freaked out Kross bails.

During the break, Impact and Cage were about to go at it again. Impact agreed to give Cage a shot after he deals with Kross. Cage doesn’t seem convinced but goes with it.

The announcers plug the Twitch channel. Still a good idea.

Rascalz vs. Lucha Bros

This could be good. Pentagon and Dezmond start things off here and proceed to stare at each other for nearly a minute and a half. CERO MIEDO earns Pentagon a grab of the arm so he kicks Dezmond in the ribs and sends him outside. Pentagon’s dive is cut off by a Stunner over the middle rope from Wentz, who gets sent into the corner by Fenix. A 619 out of the corner has Wentz in trouble so it’s back to Dezmond for a dropkick to the floor.

Dezmond hits a slingshot dropkick on Pentagon in the corner and a running Bronco Buster from Wentz. We take a break and come back with Wentz kneeing Fenix in the corner. Some strikes from the Rascalz get two on Fenix but he’s right back with a suicide dive to drive Wentz into the barricade. Back in and double superkicks into the wheelbarrow splash gets two on Dezmond with Wentz making the save.

Pentagon superkick Dezmond down but gets kneed in the face, leaving Fenix to kick Wentz in the face. Some more jumping strikes to the face put Pentagon down but Fenix rolls in with the cutter to Dezmond. Pentagon is back up and that means double superkicks abound, followed by a Fear Factor to Wentz and a Gory Special into a cutter from Fenix to Dezmond at the same time (egads) for the pin at 11:15.

Rating: B. Overly complicated finisher aside, this was a heck of a match and a great choice to open things up on the new network. The Rascalz are a ton of fun and the Lucha Bros are as proven of a commodity as you’re going to get at the moment. This was a blast and an awesome high spot match, which is often the best choice to open things up.

The Lucha Bros shake their hands after the match.

GWN Flashback of the Week: Michael Shane wins the first Ultimate X match to become X-Division Champion in 2003.

After the end of Homecoming, Kross ranted about how Impact was a failure for needing his Survivor friends to save him. That’s why Kross powerbombed Taya: to wake Johnny up.

Kross wants to know if Johnny knows how to hurt him in tonight’s No DQ match. Tonight, he’s breaking Johnny out of his skin.

Here’s Rich Swann for a chat. After a quick YOU DESERVE IT chant, Swann talks about the history of the division and calls himself the No Limit Soldier of the division with no limits. He’s ready for all comers and here’s OVE to test that theory. After some yelling at Don Callis, Sami Callihan talks about the rumors of what’s going on with Swann and OVE. They have a long history but that’s not something you get to learn right now. Since family means a lot to OVE, Swann should accept the offer of a spot on the team and come home. Callihan throws him the shirt but here’s Willie Mack to break up the fight.

Sami Callihan vs. Willie Mack

Rematch from Sunday and they start fast with a double knockdown. An exchange of headbutts goes nowhere so Sami goes to the eyes in a smart move. Sami gets sent outside and catches a sliding Mack in the ring skirt to continue hammering away. Mack comes back with a Rock Bottom onto the apron, earning what sounds like a CHOCOLATE THUNDER chant. A whip into the steps cuts Mack right back off and he gets piledriven on the stage. Mack beats the count in at nine and starts the comeback with some running shots in the corner.

A Samoan drop into the standing moonsault gets two so Sami bites the hand to get a breather. That just earns him a sitout spinebuster for two but Mack takes too long following up. Sami powerbombs him out of the corner and gets two of his own off a knee to the face. Mack shrugs that off and hits a corner Cannonball but the Stunner is blocked. The Cactus piledriver is countered as well and we hit the pinfall reversal sequence. Both finishers are reversed again until Mack gets a rollup for the pin at 10:38.

Rating: C. Nice brawl here with Mack’s natural charisma being more than enough to carry things. OVE and Sami in particular might not be the best option in the world at times but I’m moderately interested in where this story with Swann is going. Now if only the matches can back it up. The Crists vs. Mack/Swann sounds fine to me.

LAX and Konnan celebrate with booze and cigars. Everything seems to be fine after their recent issues.

Post break, LAX gets in an argument with OVE. You knew that was coming.

Here’s Scarlett Bordeaux for the Strip Show. First up though, an announcement: next week she’s ending her talent search and announcing the winner. With that out of the way, it’s time for the robe to come off but here’s the Desi Hit Squad to interrupt. Save that for the winners, which will of course be the three of them. Gama Singh rants about Americans having no values because they want to see her without her clothes on. Raju says Singh wanted to see that as well, so the argument breaks out.

Cue Scott Steiner of all people, who is here to see the debut on the Pursuit Channel. He has a bit of a limp due to hunting some two headed deer at a club in downtown Detroit. Steiner isn’t happy with the stripping being stopped so the beatdown is on. Scarlett offers him a front row seat and the robe comes off so the lap dance can begin. This was a rather unnecessary cameo, though the Impact fans will likely say “WHO CARES??? IT’S SCOTT STEINER!” I’m sure this line of thinking isn’t part of why they’re on Pursuit at all.

We look back at Gail Kim costing Tessa Blanchard the Knockouts Title.

Gail says Tessa got what was coming to her.

Tessa Blanchard vs. Cali Collins

Tessa gets aggressive to start with forearms in the corner and doesn’t seem happy when Cali tries one of her own. An Anderson eye rake across the top rope sets up a running dropkick to Cali’s back. Tessa loads up the Buzzsaw DDT but goes with Eat Defeat for the pin at 2:20 instead.

Eddie Edwards is proud of his win on Sunday and is ready to move on with his life. Eli Drake comes in to ask if Eddie wants to carry the flag of hardcore after people like Tommy Dreamer and Abyss carried it. I could go or Drake vs. Eddie.

Su Yung and Allie are next to a coffin and sound worried about Rosemary. The lights flicker and the words “One more chance to join the shadow” appear on the coffin. Nervousness ensues.

Killer Kross vs. Johnny Impact

Non-title and No DQ. Impact wastes no time in starting the brawl and stomps at the head in the ropes. Kross runs him over though and hammers away in the corner. They head outside where Impact is a bit better suited for the kicks to the chest. Impact takes forever to set up a table and gets a chair to the face for his efforts. Kross wraps the chair around his neck and slams it into the post before crotching Johnny on the barricade.

The steps are dragged around but Johnny avoids having his head crushed with a chair. Instead he knocks Kross back with a chair of his own and then piles the chairs on top of him. A moonsault crushes another chair onto the pile of chairs onto Kross for the big knockdown that didn’t look all that impressive.

Kross pops right up and they stare each other down while throwing chairs into the ring. They both pick one up and then drop them so Johnny can throw punches in the corner instead. A pelted chair to the face knocks Kross silly and Johnny piles up the chairs on him again. It’s time to go up top but Moose runs out to shove Johnny through the table at ringside. The Krossjacket choke finishes Johnny at 12:16.

Rating: C+. This was a good fight with Johnny showing aggression, but I’m not entirely sure why someone who wants to destroy Kross was busy doing flips instead of just unloading on him with the chair. Kross was his usual monster self and I’m glad to see him win, though this feels like leftovers from before Bound For Glory with just Austin Aries missing.

Moose and Kross hug to end the show.

Results

Lucha Bros b. Rascalz – Cutter to Xavier

Willie Mack b. Sami Callihan – Rollup

Tessa Blanchard b. Cali Collins – Eat Defeat

Killer Kross b. Johnny Impact – Krossjacket choke

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6