ECW on Sci-Fi
Date: July 11, 2006
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Welcome to the rest of ECW. After last week, there was no way that this could be considered ECW anymore so we’re now in whatever you want to call this. Big Show is champion and he’s supported by the EVIL Heyman, which is WWE all the way. There isn’t much else to say but the show is going to be old vs. new now. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the main event from last week.

Flair vs. Big Show for the ECW Title later. This isn’t going to get any easier.

Here’s Heyman who says he made sure RVD lost the title last week. Don’t blame him though, because it’s the fans’ fault. It’s the people’s fault that RVD got suspended for thirty days. It’s their fault that he had such a rigorous schedule and it’s their cheers that made him jump off the top. Heyman talks about the sacrifices he made for ECW and how he’s the savior of the company. He’ll do things like this if it saves the fans and he’ll do it for the good of ECW. That isn’t really an explanation but that’s too much to ask for.

Heyman and his security leave and run into Dreamer. He wants an explanation but Dreamer has a match immediately so Heyman doesn’t have time to explain.

Raw ad, on an ECW show. It’s a different company remember.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Test

Dreamer is in street clothes. Test slaps him so Dreamer goes crazy on him. They go to the floor where Test rams his back into the post to take over. Test whips him into the corner and stomps him down as this is looking like a squash. A backbreaker sets up a bearhug which is broken pretty quickly. Tommy hits a pair of neckbreakers but the DDT is countered into a full nelson slam. The top rope elbow misses and Dremer tries the DVD. Test slips off the shoulders and rolls Dreamer up, putting his feet on the ropes for the cheap pin.

Rating: D. If they really think this is how the new brand was going to get over, they were idiots. At the end of the day, this is Test, the same guy that wasn’t over from 2001-2005, so they keep pushing him anyway. Nothing to see here and Dreamer was treated like a jobber the whole time of course, which is one of the few things they’ve gotten right.

Candace says her expose will be hot.

Kelly and Candance do a dance together. At least the song is different. Knox does his usual stop but Sandman pops up to hit him with the cane. My goodness it’s an actual story.

Ariel and Kevin Thorn are creepy.

Punk talks about how his tattoos tell a story. Seriously, get to him already. He’s WAY better than this.

Sabu vs. Justin Credible

Sabu was hyped up for the first half of the show so this should be a squash. Sabu goes straight at him and knocks Justin to the floor where he looks for a weapon. That goes badly for him as Sabu hits a flip dive to the floor. Slingshot legdrop gets two back in the ring. Sabu heads to the floor and loads up a broken table, which he puts Justin through after a brief fight for the DQ. Yeah a DQ in ECW. Next.

Balls Mahoney is a little bit nuts. His words not, mine.

Flair says he’ll win his 17th title tonight. Foley needs to grow some balls as well.

Shannon Moore (not named) is freaky looking.

ECW World Title: Ric Flair vs. Big Show

Extreme Rules again. Show throws him to the floor and we take a break. Back with Flair pounding away in the corner. Joey calls this historic. Not exactly the word I’d use but whatever. Show press slams him and Flair is busted open from something. Knowing him it was a stiff breeze. Flair tries chopping him but gets knocked down by one from Show. They head to the floor for another slugout, won by Show.

To keep up the tradition, Flair chops and punches but Show chops him down with one or two shots. Show measures him but Flair hits him low. Keeping with the tradition theme, Flair hits him low a second and third time. Make it four and Show is in trouble. Flair finds a barbed wire ball bat from somewhere and hits Show in the head with it before digging it into Show’s face.

Trashcan shot to the head staggers Show as does a chair to the chest and back. Show goes down but it only gets two. Flair busts out some tacks and knocks Show into them with about five chair shots to the head. That just ticks him off though so he pulls Flair into the chokeslam and a cobra clutch backbreaker. He keeps the clutch on for the knockout win. Show throws Flair into the tacks post match.

Rating: B-. I liked this a lot more than I was expecting to. Flair is still a master of making you believe that it could happen, which is what he did here. Also, notice that he puts Show over by making it look like Show shrugged off all that offense and won with ease. That’s hot you make someone look good, which Flair made a career out of.

Flair is helped out to end the show. That and replays ate up the last three minutes.

Overall Rating: C. I think this was the best show of the first batch of them, and that’s not saying much. The show was ok with the main event being a highlight, but it’s much better because the idea that this is the rebirth of ECW is forgotten now. Instead the ECW Title is the third WWE Title, making it a much easier show to book. The opening was weak as was the rest of the show other than the main event, but I really dug that match. Watchable show, but nothing great.

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ECW on Sci-Fi
Date: July 4, 2006
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 1,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

I remember this day very well because I was dragged to a free country music concert downtown which was supposed to feature 9 acts. Due to the hardest rain storm I’ve ever seen, that wound up being 2. This show was actually a standalone ECW show, as in Smackdown was taped the Monday before but this was just ECW. The result: 1,500 people in a place that holds ten times that much (Survivor Series later that year got 15,400). It’s the old Main Event deal where it’s a full show but only the last few matches make the broadcast. This is a major overhaul in ECW’s show which is very interesting so let’s get to it.

Heyman and RVD are in the back with Heyman trying to get RVD on his side in something not important enough to explain. Big Show comes in and DEMANDS a title match tonight. No answer yet but it wouldn’t be ECW without some potentially big match being hotshotted right?

Theme song.

Time for Kelly’s Salute To America Expose, which is the usual thing (same song third week in a row too) in front of a bunch of flags. This would be light years better with Layla or the Bellas, who can actually dance a bit, or a lot in Layla’s case. And here’s Mike Knox for the save.

Mike Knox vs. Little Guido

Knox says Kelly is his so we don’t get to see her. The fans chant at him as they should. Guido jumps him to the pop of the night. He hits a dropkick to the side of the head but a second attempt misses, allowing Knox to take over. The fans want pizza and think Knox can’t wrestle. Knox goes into an EXTREME series of bodyslams as the fans think this is boring. Guido tries to get something going but gets his head kicked off and the spinning downward spiral ends this.

Rating: F. This match, if it wasn’t already, proves that ECW is dead. Guido was a big deal (kind of) in ECW, but here he’s a jobber. You know, like everyone that isn’t one of the top ECW guys. And to Mike Knox? The most generic of generic big men ever? They were going off on him here. Imagine what he would have gotten in the ECW Arena. But this is the new ECW, where the fans mean nothing and the ECW Originals are a stable 8 months from now.

RVD tells Heyman that it’s cool. Ok then.

Back in the arena a bald guy jumps the guardrail and grabs the mic. The guy is wearing what appears to be a priest’s outfit. He says this is his first ECW show and he’s disgusted by the sex, violence and language. This form of entertainment shouldn’t exist and if you enjoy it you’re a sinner, which gets the biggest pop of the night. Oh and he’s not a priest. He just wore it to get our attention. Yeah because WHO WOULD WANT A CHARACTER AGAINST EVERYTHING ECW IS FOR??? Sandman comes out and beats him up, meaning we’ll never see the priest again. I’m so glad this was included. It enhanced so much.

RVD slaps Big Show, accepting his challenge. It’ll be Extreme Rules.

Video on Test. He’s coming soon.

Test vs. Al Snow

Very soon it seems. Yeah it’s Test, one of the guys that got close to being over once and then never meant a single thing again. He’s one of the guys that’s supposed to represent ECW. The crowd things Test takes steroids. Big boot and a TKO end this.

Video on Sabu, who TALKS, and says he won’t be silent anymore. I was wrong. THIS is where they clearly didn’t get it.

We see some tattoos and hear a voice saying that he’s straightedge. He doesn’t do drugs, he doesn’t drink, he doesn’t smoke. His addiction is wrestling. His rush is competition. His name is CM Punk. Another sign that WWE clearly had no intention of this being ECW: Punk is the antithesis of everything ECW was about, so naturally he’s a face.

ECW World Title: Big Show vs. Rob Van Dam

This is just after RVD lost the WWE Title due to the drug arrest, so there’s about zero doubt as to who wins here. We get big match intros and this is under Extreme Rules. Show chases him into the corner but Rob comes back with kicks to the legs. The fans hate Show here as you would expect. A headbutt puts Van Dam on the floor and he gets crotched while trying his kick from the barricade.

You know it’s amazing: Joey, the free thinking announcer that went to ECW because he was tired of being a WWE announcer, uses the EXACT same lines about Big Show (you have to see him live, hands like skillets etc) that the WWE announcers use. Pure coincidence of course, because Joey Styles is different and WWE would never tell him what to say, which is why we need to bring him back right? He just goes renegade every night and says whatever he thinks. Van Dam gets in a kick and the spinning kick to the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Rob in trouble but he manages the springboard kick out of the corner. Not that it matters as he gets crotched and superplexed for two. The walking legdrop gets two. The fans are trying to be an ECW crowd but they’re in the wrong arena to do that. Show drops an EXTREME elbow for two as the fans chant marijuana. A bearhug goes on and the fans totally turn on the match. It gets even worse as Show lays down on the mat while still holding it.

Show follows that up with a backbreaker, bending Rob over his knee afterwards. There hasn’t been anything EXTREME in this match so far either. That stip has been completely worthless. Show tries a chokeslam but Rob counters into a DDT. Rolling Thunder gets two. He tries the top rope kick but Show catches him with ease and throws him to the floor. Show tries the steps but gets his knee kicked out and his head hits the steps.

A top rope dive is caught again and Show keeps control to make sure the crowd doesn’t get interested. Rob grabs a chair but it gets swatted away and the chokeslam gets two. There goes the referee and Show loads up a powerbomb. Rob grabs the chair though and pops him with the chair, ala HHH vs. Undertaker at Mania X7. Van Daminator sets up the Five Star but there’s no referee. Here’s Heyman ala One Night Stand but instead he turns heel and joins Big Show. Chokeslam changes the title as it’s Survivor Series 2002 all over again. That belt looks like a toy on Show.

Rating: D-. Not only was it stupid, but the match wasn’t even that good. If ECW wasn’t dead already, this ended it. To begin with, it’s a special match now that it’s Extreme, even though that’s the name of the company. Second, this was a WWE main event style match, but Big Show was the weakest main event guy in the company so no one was interested. Third, it’s another corrupt authority figure, which is WWE Booking 101. Bad match to end a horrible show.

Overall Rating: E. As in ECW is Dead. The company was done back in 2001 but for one night (in 2005), it was around again. The TV show was never going to be ECW, which is clear here for all the reasons I gave earlier. The Originals would be jobbers forever and the big muscleheads like Knox and Test and eventually Lashley would become the focus, which no one wanted to see. If this new show had been called ANYTHING but ECW, it wouldn’t be nearly as reviled as it is. Even if we ignore the name though, the show’s biggest problem is that it’s not that good. This is a really boring series and it needs to change a lot, which it would.

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