King of the Ring 2000: Not Even 2000 Was Perfect

King of the Ring 2000
Date: June 25, 2000
Location: Fleet Center, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 17,651
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Thirty two people. That’s how many are in this year’s tournament. They’ve widdled it down to eight for this, but DANG man, 32 initially in it? Anyway, the Radicals being here is probably the biggest change to things. Angle and Jericho are here as well, so the roster has certainly changed a lot. WCW is just waiting to be put out of its misery as no one is watching and fewer people care.

This is a decent bad looking card though as there’s the tournament, a four team elimination match and the main event is a six man tag where the belt is on the line. HHH won it the previous month at Judgment Day where Taker returned as the biker. There’s not a lot going on here other than that, so let’s get to it.

We get a quick recap of the tournament history which is always a cool thing. Other than that we have a thing on the title with HHH saying the belt is the most important thing in his life. I think that would actually be Stephanie who wouldn’t have the title without him. Ok that’s nonsense but I have to say it at least once a year by law. Here are your brackets:

Kurt Angle
Chris Jericho

Crash Holly
Bull Buchanan

Rikishi
Chris Benoit

Val Venis
Eddie Guerrero

That doesn’t sound half bad.

KOTR Quarterfinals: Rikishi vs. Chris Benoit

Rikishi just won the IC Title from Benoit as his completely unexplainable push continues before he was made top heel in the fall which failed worse than a flimsy bra on Trish Stratus. Benoit beat him up after the match so he might be a bit hurt. The Canadian beat Road Dogg and X-Pac while Dusty Rhodes’ partner in the fat that ate Cleveland beat Shane McMahon and Scotty Too Hotty. Benoit manages to suplex Rikishi which is rather impressive.

There’s a Chris Benoit sign that says this isn’t a Chris Benoit sign. I hate stupid fans. The Crossface is hooked but the fat man thinks the ropes are Twizzlers and grabs them, hoping to eat them. And then Benoit gets a chair and beats on Rikishi with it, ending this very quickly thank goodness. Another Crossface follows and referees break it up. Benoit goes up and splits them all up with a headbutt and puts the hold on Rikishi again, much to my delight.

Rating: C+. In a match that goes three minutes or so and most of it is Rikishi being hurt, I’m certainly happy. There wasn’t much here but it got through some time I guess. The whole thing here though is that the fat man got hurt so I’m happy.

Linda says she’s going to have to do something drastic.

The heels say that they should be worried about Linda but Vince isn’t worried at all.

We get a replay of Rikishi being beaten. I love this.

Benoit says he’s the best and no one can stop him.

KOTR Quarterfinals: Val Venis vs. Eddie Guerrero

Chyna looks great, but Trish looks better. This should be fine I guess. Venis hurt Eddie on Smackdown even though he looks fine here. Trish more or less wears a one piece swimsuit and a coat so I’m happy. Val beat Al Snow and Jeff Hardy while Eddie beat Matt Hardy and Chyna. Eddie has just gotten back from his arm injury that he got in one of his first matches in the company.

This is definitely picking the pace up a lot which is a major help. Eddie was just such a wreck in real life at this point and he was about to crack. The RTC was about to start as well to give Val something to do. Eddie starts working on the back to add some mild psychology here. And now Val works on Eddie’s back, which is just weird for some reason.

The Money Shot hits nothing but knees and there’s part of a joke in there somewhere. Val is definitely a heel here but it’s not saying much. After the women get involved, Val wins with a nice fisherman’s suplex. That was rather pointless.

Rating: C-. This just wasn’t that good. Val and Eddie are both good workers but this just failed for the most part. It was like they were searching for a story but they couldn’t find one no matter how hard they tried. The ending part was a big improvement but it still wasn’t much at all.

Patterson, who is fighting Brisco later on in a lingire match for the hardcore title, says that none of the dresses he has available make him look sexy enough. You can’t make stuff like this up.

Rikishi says he’s going to beat Val. I really hate him.

KOTR Quarter Finals: Crash Holly vs. Bull Buchanan

Please…make it quick. Crash beat Albert and Hardcore Holly while Bull beat Blackman and Saturn. Was anyone not in this tournament? Crash has the scale thing here because that was such a great gimmick. It kept him employed if nothing else I guess. He’s doing the Cinderella story thing here. We see a clip of Brisco and Patterson stealing the Hardcore title from Crash on Raw.

Buchanan just couldn’t be blander if his life depended on it. He’s getting into Tomko levels here. The crowd busts out the boring chant and I can’t blame them a bit. It’s weak but it’s the longest I’ve ever heard. The coronation is tomorrow night apparently, since obviously we can’t hold it here because…well we just can’t I guess. A rollup for Crash gets two. Buchanan misses an axe kick and Crash rolls him up for the pin. Thank goodness the referee did a fast count for the most part.

Rating: D. This was just a waste of time. The fans got the chant exactly right. They have Benoit go out in the first round so we get this? I know the company was on freaking fire at the moment but geez, they couldn’t have gotten this one more wrong.

Linda is in her office when Vince comes in and lists off everything she’s done to tick him off over the years. She’s done a lot actually, but dang she can’t act to save her life. This is the weirdest marriage of all time.

KOTR Quarter Finals: Kurt Angle vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho beat Bradshaw and Bubba while Jericho beat Test and Edge in a series of Canadian violence. Angle runs down Boston’s sports teams before the match, which is ironic as about two years ago it was the greatest sports town in the world. Jericho is of course wildly over. This is one of those matches that it’s just hard to mess up. He uses the Kirk Angel line that never gets old for some reason.

Can we have a two hour show of these two just insulting each other? It would be better than most wrestling shows. He implies Angle is a virgin, which is funny considering what his wife looked like. About a minute into the match Jericho hits the Lionsault and Long has to count really slowly because Angle misses his cue to put his foot on the bottom rope.

Angle has a ton of fans here and I can’t blame them as he was just epic at this point as he played his character perfectly and could back it up in the ring. Angle has to use the ropes to get out of another pin. Long’s counting is annoying the heck out of me. It’s worse than the blonde guy in WWE now.

Jericho gets out of the Angle Slam and hooks the Walls but Stephanie is here to distract the referee while Angle is tapping. Stephanie accidently pops Angle with her women’s title and she gets kissed by Jericho. It does however allow Angle to hook the slam for the pin.

Rating: B. Again, hard to mess this one up. It’s about ten minutes and it worked fine. These guys had undeniable chemistry together and it showed here. It lasted a good enough time to make it work and the workrate was all there, so what more can you ask for? We definitely needed Crash and Bull in the first round instead of Jericho and Angle beating one of them each right?

Updated brackets:

Kurt Angle
Crash Holly

Rikishi
Eddie Guerrero

Shane is mad at Vince for getting the interference barred from the main event. The way the match works tonight is that if any face gets the pin then they’re world champion and if HHH’s team wins, he faces the winner of the tournament.

Mick Foley is at WWF New York, which is still the coolest thing ever. Ivory is the bartender and Foley has a huge haircut. We can barely hear Foley over the fans chanting for Foley and Ivory. Foley doesn’t remember the 98 Cell match but he likes Angle apparently. That’s most odd.

Tag Titles: Edge/Christian vs. Too Cool vs. Hardys vs. Too Cool

The champions, Too Cool (just take me now) are out last. Edge and Christian do the 5 second pose which is of Buckner and the Mets in 86. Lita and Trish look amazing. For some reason Too Cool is popular which I’ll never understand for the life of me. What was cool about them? Scotty’s belt is on upside down. This is elimianton rules by the way so it’s kind of like three matches in one which isn’t bad at all. Jeff has the rainbow hair now and starts with Albert.

Jeff is put in a gorilla press but flips out of it and hits a dropkick in a sweet little sequence. He and Matt beat on Albert. They really were a great team. Matt and Jeff keep getting out of the power moves from T&A as Lita and Trish get into it in foreshadowing of their epic future rivalry. The redhead is in the ring for no apparent reason and gets a nice cheer, and it allows Matt to pin Test after a Swanton.

It’s Jeff and Scotty now, who is apparently happy that he managed to get dressed all by himself this morning. Now let’s stop to dance a bit. They’re going really fast out there for no apparent reason. Jeff and Edge, who would eventually main event PPVs which I don’t think anyone really expected, go at it in what is of course a solid encounter. Lita, pink thong flying, throws a hurricanrana to get two on Edge for Jeff.

She’s still kind of annoying despite being hot. Everyone goes for or hit their finishers, resulting in Christian putting Matt out. Oh apparently Too Cool is still here. They had nothing at all to do with that so no one even remembered they were there. We just had to have Too Cool as champions too because we couldn’t let Edge and Christian and the Hardys go out there and just show off or anything good like that right?

Naturally Too Cool is just doing comedy stuff because it’s all they’re capable of. After a few minutes of Scotty getting beaten on, we get the epicness, yes EPICNESS I say of the hot tag to Grandmaster. It’s a comedy match for the most opart here for the tag titles. Too Cool seem like the guys that don’t realize they’re champions and couldn’t care less if they lost them.

Edge and Christian start a double worm but Scotty, despite being late and causing Christian to not know what he’s supposed to do, makes the stop. He does the worm, which of course takes about 30 seconds to do the whole thing, making it completely stupid. The champions hit a Trash Compactor but the referee is busy so Christian gets a shot with the belt to get the belts again.

Rating: C. This is the epitome of average. It’s not good, it’s not bad, it’s just there. It’s about 15 minutes long or five minutes per elimination and Too Cool lost the belts to edge and Christian. That’s all there is to it. It’s not bad or great, but perfectly average, meaning it’s not really a good sign but Too Cool aren’t the champions anymore so I’m happy.

Crash says Angle is in trouble.

We get to see Benoit beat up Rikishi again, making my heart go all aflutter.

KOTR Semi-Finals: Rikishi vs. Val Venis

These two would fight again at Fully Loaded in the cage splash match that I’ve previously reviewed. They have been feuding for awhile here so at least there’s something to go on here, which I think is what the plan was which I really like, as it helps things out a lot here at the show. We start on the floor and it’s just a brawl at this point. Ah there we go we’re in the ring now.

Why can’t we do that with Val, who has a decent one? Rikishi’s arm is still hurt from earlier. We get the odd sight of Rikishi throwing left hands. Val goes up for the splash but gets crotched, allowing Rikishi to hit a belly to belly to win. Post match he tries to hit the hip drop on Trish but Val hits him with the stairs and a chair. What lucky star did I wake up under?

Rating: C+. Everything on this show is average. There’s just nothing appealing here at all and it’s just not working for me. This was again about three minutes long and even more proof as to why we don’t need to do the final three rounds on the PPV as there’s just too much going on here.

To continue this review, please press eject and turn the tape over.

Brisco is with Coach and cuts this very serious promo that is very funny, which I think was the point. He doesn’t say if he wants regular panties or crotchless. I just got done with Starrcade 83 and saw he and his brother have a great match with Steamboat and Youngblood, and now this. I love wrestling.

KOTR Semi-Finals: Crash Holly vs. Kurt Angle

Hmm, I wonder who is going to win here. I love that under Angle’s name it says American Hero. There’s something very funny about that. This is pretty crisp actually and it’s not bad at all. Crash shouting screw you at the referee is funny for some reason. It’s a shame that Crash had such a comedy based gimmick that he never got the change to show what he was capable of. The same goes for Al Snow.

We get an XFL reference and we need the death music already. Crash isn’t backing down, I’ll give him that. He hits a missile dropkick and the fans are buying into this. Out of nowhere off a hot shot, Angle hits the slam to end it. This was only four minutes, but it felt like a lot longer, and I mean that in a good way.

Rating: B. I really liked this match. It was very fast paced and they fit a lot into the little time they had. Like I said, it’s a shame that Crash had the comedy gimmick and couldn’t get a chance to showcase himself as he’s not that bad at all in the ring. I liked this.

King says that King Rikishi isn’t something you can even pronounce.

We get a clip of a show last night in MSG where Trump was there. He must be a legit. That’s saying a lot, and he’s a Rock fan.

Cole is in the back with Kane who can now talk sans voice box, which I think has been the case for a long time here.

Taker all of a sudden can talk fine as well and says he’ll win the title.

We recap the evening gown match that’s coming up. Brisco won the title from Crash on Raw and Patterson broke a champagne bottle over his head and pinned him. He threw in a suck it and crotch chop and I begin to wonder about these two. Patterson, scared to death of losing the title, wore drag and hid in the women’s locker room.

Brisco wanted to get in there to pin him, so he put on a dress that he just happened to have laying around I guess. It resulted in them throwing makeup at each other. Vince came up, stunned, and said there would be an evening gown match tonight.

Hardcore Title: Pat Patterson vs. Gerald Brisco

They’re wearing wigs too. Gerald comes out to Real American which HAS to be a rib on Hogan. Brisco comes out with a 2×4. Patterson comes out to showgirl music with a shopping cart of toilet paper and other stupid stuff. He’s wearing a bra too and throws candy out of it. This is hilarious for some perverse reason. We get the line of him doing rear end work at the body shop.

For those of you not getting my constant jokes, the worst kept secret in wrestling history is that Patterson is gay. Patterson is wearing sneakers and Brisco is wearing heels. Oh and Patterson has sunglasses on. Patterson offers to lay down, prompting even more jokes, even though you win by ripping the clothes off I thought. And Patterson has a banana which I don’t think Ross realized at first.

The line of OH it’s a BANANA was hilarious as all goodness. Patterson reaches under his dress and pulls out a tampon to shove in his face. The red panties are smacked by Brisco with a low blow. And we get a Bronco Buster. Ok the joke is over now. And thankfully Crash comes down with a referee and a trash can. After ripping Brisco’s clothes off, he hits Patterson with the can to get the title to a massive pop. This just became disturbing near the end.

Rating: O, as in oh what do you think the grade here is?

We see the Dudleys bringing a table with Tori’s name on it. At Judgment Day, they had tried to put her through a table but didn’t get to so Bubba is now in a trance until he can do it. Tori put Bubba through one and then DX put them in a dumpster and threw them off the stage. That leads us here.

Tori/Road Dogg/X-Pac vs. Dudleys

This is a handicap, table dumpster match. You win by putting the other in or through the respective item. Tori is badly hurt here and would more or less be gone after this. It’s a shame too as she was freaking sexy. DX comes out to a Run DMC song, as there was a rap album of themes coming out. Since this is such a violent match, we have tags just in case.

The Dudleys were revolutionizing tag wrestling as no one knew what to make of them. They breathed new life into the place and they had hooked up with Edge and Christian and the Hardys a few months prior for the triple threat ladder match which set the world on fire for awhile. We’re at about 8 crotch chops after maybe a minute and a half. Again, what’s the point of it being no DQ if you have to tag? Scratch that, reverse it.

In a funny spot, D-Von does the What’s Up on Tori and then stays there. Can’t say I blame him. It was clear that the Dudleys would be faces very soon and the fans want tables. DX get the lid shut with them in the dumpster but the referee is with Tori. They escape but DX don’t notice it. Yeah the Dudleys are faces here. It’s odd to think of DX as heels I think. The successful team here sets up two tables on the floor and puts steps in the ring.

Road Dogg takes a sweet bump over the ropes through both tables in a powerbomb. I don’t think this is elimination rules but Dogg is out for the most part. Tori is holding her crotch which is just odd looking. Being he genius that she is, she gets in the ring with X-Pac being put through a table.

She dives into the dumpster but two chair shots put the Dudleys in the dumpster for the win. Both of them get a 3D and you know what’s coming. Tori is powerbombed out of the company. I think Tori’s arm got hurt in the dumpster. Something is clearly not right with it. Bubba’s trance is always funny.

Rating: C+. Again, just an average brawl. I’m getting tired of this show being nothing but average and men in women’s clothing. It’s just not interesting at all and it’s going by fast enough, but I haven’t been interested all night long and that’s never a good thing.

Angle says he’ll win and we get to see Rikishi get beaten up again. The fat man says he’s going to win and sounds very stupid.

We get the same video package we got at the beginning of the show.

KOTR Finals: Rikishi vs. Kurt Angle

The fans are burned out on these guys as you would expect them to be. We start on the floor of course. The stink face is blocked thank goodness. This could be on any Raw or Smackdown, which doesn’t say much to me. The one arm thing doesn’t make a lot of sense but it’s something I guess. Angle gets the stink face of course because that’s just so cool of a move right? Angle slam gets two.

Rikishi makes the comeback, including a freaking diamond cutter of all things, but takes a belly to belly off the second rope that I think was supposed to look a lot better than it did but the powers of the fat trump the powers of America and it’s just ok. That gives the crown to Kurt, and of course the ceremony’s tomorrow night, since that makes SO much freaking sense right? This reminded me of Razor vs. Owen in 94.

There was just NO FREAKING WAY Owen could lose it and it killed any heat the match had. Also, you have Jericho, Guerrero and Benoit available to be in the finals vs. Angle, yet the 400lb Samoan in a thong gets the spot? See what I mean when I say Vince doesn’t get it a lot of the time?

Rating: D+. This was exactly what you would expect these two to do, but it just wasn’t entertaining at all. Rikishi simply wasn’t any good and that was the problem. The size never worked at all as no one, not even greats like Austin or Angle could do anything with him because of the freaking size. It cut Kurt, a power guy, off here too and that’s just not a good thing whatsoever.

The heels have a short thing where Vince has gotten on the others’ nerves.

Rock is in USA Today, as apparently the WWF was big enough to warrant a comparison to baseball by a national paper. Wrestling was HUGE at this time.

WWF Title: HHH/Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon vs. Rock/Kane/Undertaker

Yeah those sides are fair. Like mentioned earlier, if HHH or either McMahon is pinned, HHH loses the title to whoever gets the pin. If HHH’s team wins, HHH fights Angle. There’s no explanation of how this came about but HHH was feuding with Rock and Taker showed up to get at Vince and Shane was with Vince and Kane was just there for the sake of being there. All of the faces get their own entrances. Shane is a pussy apparently.

The pussy starts with Kane. And that’s more or less the high point. This match goes on nearly TWENTY MINUTES and I stopped caring after about two. It’s just filling in the time the whole way rather than anything actually of note going on. The faces keep fighting amongst themselves while the heels keep getting in a few shots here and there. One major problem here is that they never actually explain why Take hates Vince.

Now if you followed wrestling well enough around this time, it’s not that hard to figure out, but good night man, give us something at least. The match just goes on and on and it’s boring as any and all goodness. We get that the faces don’t get along. You don’t need to remind us a dozen times per minute. Everyone beats on everyone as we’re in the orgy mode here. Nothing of note happens as it’s all just one big mess as everyone beats on everyone with no particular rhyme or reason.

FINALLY we get to the point as most everyone goes outside and given the amount of time left we know that someone is going to get a pinfalll soon and end this. Since Vince is alone in the ring, I’m willing to bet that it’s him. And yep, there’s a Rock Bottom and a new champion to celebrate. And yep that’s all there is.

Rating: D-. Oy thank goodness this is over. No one cared about the thing but since we had seen Rock vs. HHH a half dozen times they needed to shift things, and since there’s some law against Kane getting a title shot on PPV, this is what we got instead. It was a weird idea and seriously, did anyone thing there wouldn’t be a new champion? I’m just glad this is over.

Overall Rating: D. And that’s being VERY generous. There is nothing at all worth watching on here. Jericho and Angle have done the same thing about ten times better at least a dozen times. Crash Holly of all people might be the most interesting person on this. That’s just absurd.

The matches were pointless, the title change was one of about five that summer, and the whole thing just plodded along. Angle was a given once we got down to four, and that ruins the rest of the tournament matches. Stay away from this one as well. The next one is much better though, so that’s better than nothing.

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Monday Night Raw – April 19, 1999: WWF Needs Ritalin

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 19, 1999
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Attendance: 10,671
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

It’s the go home show for Backlash and the main story is the Ministry being totally out of control. The Corporation is fighting them as well as they can but there’s just too much going on for them to do much good. Other than that we’ll get the fallout from Rock throwing both Austin and the title belt into the river last week. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Smoking Skull belt being introduced and then thrown in the river last week with Austin following it into the water.

Rock drives a hearse into the arena because he buried the title last week. This week it’s going to be a funeral with Rock delivering the eulogy. We even have a casket, flowers, and a big mound of dirt. Rock climbs onto the mound while guaranteeing to show that he’s the best champion ever on Sunday. Simple stuff here but on a big stage.

Vince and Stephanie will do a sitdown interview in Connecticut tonight so Vince is checking with security to make sure Stephanie is safe.

Road Dogg vs. Owen Hart

There’s no ramp this week due to the grave taking up so much space. Before the match, Dogg says that the Outlaws are the #1 contenders but if he loses tonight, Owen and Jarrett are the #1 contenders, no questions asked. However, if Dogg wins, the world gets to see Debra’s puppies. That’s the first time that term was ever used in the WWF so there’s your historical moment.

Owen jumps Dogg to start as Jerry is now a huge Roadie fan. The left hands and shaky knee drop get two on Owen but he comes back with a spinwheel kick (Lawler: “NO!”). A legdrop gets two more for Hart and he nails an enziguri for a close two. Owen drops a middle rope elbow but Dogg kicks out of the Sharpshooter and hits the pumphandle slam for the pin, sending Lawler into orbit.

Rating: D. This was just about the post match stuff and introducing one of the longest running jokes in WWF history to the lexicon. The tag match on Sunday was the more important story anyway, but this is far most historic. It says a lot that Owen and Jarrett were one of the top teams in the division.

Jeff Jarrett prevents the unveiling.

Undertaker sends the Acolytes out to take care of the Brood.

Rock is practicing his eulogy.

Brood vs. Acolytes

Christian is the odd man out here. It’s a brawl to start with the power guys easily taking over to start. Farrooq powerbombs Edge down but the Canadian comes back with a spinwheel kick and some lame kicks to the shoulder. That’s fine with Farrooq as he comes back with a spinebuster and makes the tag to Bradshaw. Gangrel comes in and fights out of a superplex before hitting a quick DDT.

Bradshaw hits a quick fall away slam and brings Farrooq back in for a belly to back suplex/neckbreaker combo. Farrooq works on the back as Lawler’s voice sounds like it’s cracking. Gangrel finally gets over for a tag but Bradshaw takes Edge’s head off before he can get going. The double powerbomb lays out Edge but Shamrock runs in with a ball bat to knock Bradshaw silly for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Not much better than the opener but it had more time and the teams knew how to work a decent match. Neither team would do anything for awhile but once Edge and Christian took off they never looked back. The main event war continues to devour the entire company.

Undertaker is livid at the Acolytes for not getting a pin.

There’s a new special coming. It’s called Smackdown.

During the break, Undertaker and Viscera beat the tar out of Farrooq and Bradshaw.

Intercontinental Title: Godfather vs. Hardcore Holly

Only Godfather’s title is on the line. It’s a slugout to start with Godfather getting the better of it. A boot to the face sends Holly to the floor where he picks up a cookie sheet, only to get rolled up for two. The Ho Train crushes Holly but we’ve got a ref bump a minute into the match. Holly rolls outside again and nails Godfather with the cookie sheet several times before throwing him out to the floor. A hockey stick over Godfather’s back has him in even more trouble but Godfather kicks a chair into Holly’s face. Goldust comes out and breaks up Godfather’s cover, but Snow lays Holly out with Head to give Godfather the pin.

Rating: D-. Did I mention this is Russo time? It’s a three minute and five second match, complete with a ref bump, four weapons and two run ins. I have no idea why the match needed all this stuff but that’s part of Russo’s philosophy: a title match isn’t enough to keep the fans’ entrance so all this stuff has to be thrown in. It works once in awhile but when it happens all the time, the effect wears off.

Undertaker is on the phone with Mideon and tells him not to fail.

Rock is having his shoes shined and promises to bury Austin tonight.

Ken Shamrock vs. Big Boss Man

No holds barred due to Boss Man attacking Shamrock last week to kick him out of the Corporation, though Shamrock is still loyal to Vince. The brawl starts in the aisle with no one in control. Boss Man is sent into the steps and then into the ring for the opening bell. Shamrock kicks Boss Man in the head and they slug it out until an enziguri (hit Ken’s shoulder) puts Shamrock down. A much better pair of spinebusters get three straight two counts and a powerslam gets one more. Boss Man hammers away even more but Ken grabs a hurricanrana and belly to belly out of nowhere for the pin.

Rating: D-. The gimmick brings this down as there was no reason for this to be no holds barred at all. If nothing else it makes future matches with the same gimmick look stupid as fans will say “the last one sucked so why should I care about this one?” As a regular match it wasn’t much to see either.

Undertaker immediately pops up and says he knows where Ryan Shamrock is, even knowing her room number. Ken runs to the back.

The Mean Street Posse comes out for commentary.

Mankind vs. HHH

Some right hands have HHH in early trouble but Chyna pulls Mankind down by the tie and hits him in the face. That doesn’t last long though as a backdrop puts HHH down again and he gets tied up in the Tree of Woe. HHH comes back again and hits the running knee to send Mankind outside. Chyna gets in even more shots as the Posse hasn’t had much to say so far.

Back in and HHH drops a knee for two before clotheslining Mankind out to the floor. Both guys are sent into the steps with HHH getting the better of it and hammering away back inside. The Pedigree is countered but HHH blocks the catapult attempt, so Mankind falls head first onto his crotch. Socko is loaded up but Chyna crotches Mankind against the post for a DQ.

Rating: C-. Better match but that’s still not saying match. These guys were capable of having some classics but they need more than six minutes on a random Raw in the middle of April. The DQ/screwy finishes are getting really annoying tonight, which says a lot given what we usually have to sit through on this show.

Post match the Corporation comes in to attack Mankind but Big Show makes the save. He hits a HUGE chokeslam on Test to send everyone running. Mankind grabs the mic and says thank you very much, but they’ll still meet in his boiler room on Sunday.

Rock is on the phone in the parking lot and says his car cost $40,000.

Billy Gunn vs. Jeff Jarrett

Jeff sends him into the corner and stomps away to start but walks into a great powerslam for two. Owen comes out to trip Billy, allowing Jarrett to clothesline him outside. Road Dogg gets caught trying to help and Gunn is posted. A bulldog gets two for Jarrett but Billy drops him face first onto the top turnbuckle to take over.

Road Dogg helps his partner out with a right hand but Billy and Jeff hit heads to knock each other down. JR is already annoyed at the puppy jokes as Billy nails a neckbreaker, but Debra unbuttons her top to show off her bra. Billy simply drops his tights and hits a Fameasser on Jarrett but Owen comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C-. That’s almost out of pity as these matches have just been awful tonight. The tag matches make sense for Sunday, but I don’t see the point in having one team win both of the matches. The puppy stuff would dominate anything to do with women for about the next three years, much to JR’s annoyances.

Debra takes off her jacket but Jeff covers her bra with the guitar.

Rock won’t give an interview to WWF.com and tells the interviewer to get him some fruit.

Viscera vs. Big Show

They lock up to start and Big Show easily shoves him to the mat. Viscera takes him into the corner for some fat man splashes, only to get crushed with a clothesline. A rather impressive hiptoss puts Viscera down but he comes back with more fat man splashes. Big Show kicks him in the face to drop Viscera again but the lights go out as he loads up the chokeslam. We’ll say it’s a no contest here after your usual battle of the huge men match.

Undertaker and Paul Bearer come to the ring and we get the real showdown with Big Show. They slug it out and both try chokeslams but Viscera gets back up for the double team. Big Show still won’t go down but Undertaker punches him onto one knee. Mankind comes out to even things up but Undertaker leaves Viscera alone. Big Show superkicks Viscera to the floor. It really is amazing how much bigger Show is than Viscera, who is a massive man.

We look at Shane taking over the Corporation last week.

Vince and Stephanie are in Connecticut for a sitdown interview with Michael Cole. Vince says he’s always been proud of Shane but he wasn’t always there for him. Shane missed a lot as well because Vince wasn’t there, but Vince wasn’t proud last week. Stephanie can’t believe what Shane has done recently but knows that the only person that can keep her safe is Vince.

Security interrupts the interview and says something is going on in the parking lot. Vince tells the guards to stay there with Stephanie and goes after whoever is in the parking lot. It turns out to be Mideon and Vince beats the tar out of him before trying to crush Mideon with his own car. Mideon escapes and gets into the car as we go to a break.

Here’s Val Venis to say he’s solved the Y2K problem. All the ladies have to do is add a few extra bytes of ram from his hard drive and everything will be fine. This brings out Sable who says that’s nice, but she’s got bigger news: in two weeks, she’ll be shooting her second Playboy pictorial. This brings out Ivory and D’Lo Brown and the double brawl is on for no apparent reason. Now Sable’s bodyguard Nicole Bass comes out to destroy Ivory with a chokeslam. Val seems to have eyes for Sable.

It’s time for Rock to deliver the eulogy for Austin. Rock sets the tone with “Dearly trailer park trash”. Oh we could be in for a good one here. Rock isn’t sure if a roody poo like Steve Austin will fit in that casket before we get the real point of this: Rock opens his jacket to reveal the Smoking Skull belt. He runs his mouth about Backlash a bit until you can hear an engine revving.

We go outside and Austin is in a 3:16 monster truck. He goes over to the Rock’s car and puts it in the middle of the parking lot before getting back in the monster truck. Austin teases it a bit by driving around the Lincoln Continental a few times before crushing the brand new $40,000 car, sending Rock into a frenzy.

With that nice and destroyed, Austin drives the truck into the arena and beers are consumed. Back into the truck and Austin runs over the hearse before the fight is on. Rock barely gets in a single shot before Austin nails him with the belt to send Rock into the grave. Austin poses with the title but Shane comes in (remember that he’s the referee on Sunday) and breaks a shovel over Austin’s head to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This is where Vince Russo was in need of the leash more than ever. All the stuff in the middle of this show was about as dreadful as you can get because it keeps going so fast that you can’t keep up with anything at all. However, there’s good stuff on both ends of the show that make it worth seeing. As for a go home show though, this really didn’t hold up well either. Most of the matches were just glossed over and the pay per view sounds like it’s going to be a big commercial for the next night’s Raw. That being said, it’s still better than anything WCW was doing at this point and that’s all that mattered.

Here’s Backlash if you’re interested:

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Wrestler of the Day – May 20: Brian Christopher

Turn it up. It’s Brian Christopher.

Brian got his start in his dad’s promotion in Memphis in the late 80s. We’ll pick things up with Christopher in a tag team called the New Kids on February 2, 1991.

New Kids vs. Fabulous Ones

Tony Williams of the New Kids dropkicks Stan Lane down to start as Cornette is running his mouth on commentary. Referee Miller is kicked down by Lane the Karate Master so it’s off to Christopher. Brian superkicks Steve Keirn down for two and Cornette is losing it. He goes to manage as Keirn can’t figure Christopher out. A backdrop finally puts him down so it’s off to Lane who gets caught in a quick sunset flip for two. Off to Tony who is slammed down with ease.

Jim is back on commentary to make the match that much better. The New Kids keep trying for a fast win because they can’t go man to man vs. the Fabs. Keirn slams Tony’s head into a chair on the floor and it’s back inside. Tony gets between Stan’s legs and makes the tag to Christopher. The Fabs double team him again and it’s back to the outside. Keirn is illegal and piledrives Miller for the DQ. It was a DQ at times and at times it wasn’t so it’s hard to keep up with.

Rating: C-. Not much of a match but this is how you give someone a rub. The New Kids weren’t proven yet so having them hang in there with a famous team like the Fabulous Ones and even pick up a win here is a great way to make the New Kids look a lot better. The Fabs couldn’t pin them which is a major key. Not a great match, but a good rub.

Christopher would become a big deal as a heel in 1993. Here’s a match from that period on February 13, 1993.

Brian Christopher vs. Jeff Jarrett

Luger and two other guys that I don’t recognize are here with Christopher. Brian says there’s no need for Lex to be here for this one but then he changes his mind. Ok then. There are no apron curtains. That’s not something I’ve seen outside of a tiny indy company. Lex sits in on commentary for this. There can’t be more than 150 people at this. Ever heard me say someone is stalling like a man from Memphis? Here’s a good example of something like that.

First contact: 63 seconds in. Christopher keeps shouting to Lex how awesome he is but in a sucking up way, not an evil way. Second contact: 100 seconds in. We’re over two minutes in and we’ve had two tieups and that’s it. Ok from what I can find, Christopher is also the Texas Champion. Jeff finally has enough and pops Brian in the face with a right hand. We finally get going as Brian hits a clothesline and stomps a bit. To be fair, Memphis was far more based on egging on the crowd than the in ring action.

A backbreaker gets two for Christopher. He misses an elbow though and Jeff grabs a rollup for two. How weird is it that these two would reach their biggest successes as totally different characters? Christopher as a dancing idiot and Jarrett as a self-obsessed heel. One of the guys that came out with Christopher grabs Jeff’s leg but he manages a DDT to Christopher anyway. Not that it matters as the other guy comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C-. These matches are hard to rate as there isn’t much action in them, but like I said there isn’t supposed to be. These were two fairly big names and two acts that were over as a face and a heel, which is really all you can ask for. At the same time though, there’s barely any wrestling and it was all set up for the ending, which is ok, but it’s still nothing to see.

After several more years in Memphis, Christopher would debut in the WWF as Jerry Lawler’s mentee. He would enter the fledgling Light Heavyweight division and have a match at In Your House 17.

Scott Putski vs. Brian Christopher

Putski is the son of WWF Hall of Famer Ivan Putski while Christopher is the son of Jerry Lawler. However Lawler hasn’t admitted to this yet, but instead is saying he’s a big fan of Christopher and has helped him win matches. An immediate Jerry’s Kid chant starts us off, which Lawler writes off as a reference to Jerry Lewis’ Labor Day marathon. Putski gets in the first shot and drives Christopher into the corner before tossing him out to the floor.

Back in and Brian grabs a headlock before clotheslining him down with ease. Scott comes back with a hurricanrana for two but gets caught in a full nelson leg sweep faceplant (the Skull Crushing Finale or Chris Jericho’s Breakdown) gets two. Jerry: “That’s my boy!” JR: “What?” Putski falls to the floor and Brian follows with a nice dive to take him out again. The fall seems to have injured Scott’s knee and Brian wins by countout.

Rating: D. I’m thinking there was something to that knee injury as there was no reason to end the match so soon. It didn’t last that long and I have no idea why this was on a pay per view. Putski is a good example of a guy who had a great look but had the big problem of being his father’s son. His dad Ivan was a popular wrestler and there was no way Scott could live up to his reputation.

Brian would enter a tournament for the restored Light Heavyweight Title, making the finals at In Your House 19.

Scott Putski vs. Brian Christopher

Putski is the son of WWF Hall of Famer Ivan Putski while Christopher is the son of Jerry Lawler. However Lawler hasn’t admitted to this yet, but instead is saying he’s a big fan of Christopher and has helped him win matches. An immediate Jerry’s Kid chant starts us off, which Lawler writes off as a reference to Jerry Lewis’ Labor Day marathon. Putski gets in the first shot and drives Christopher into the corner before tossing him out to the floor.

Back in and Brian grabs a headlock before clotheslining him down with ease. Scott comes back with a hurricanrana for two but gets caught in a full nelson leg sweep faceplant (the Skull Crushing Finale or Chris Jericho’s Breakdown) gets two. Jerry: “That’s my boy!” JR: “What?” Putski falls to the floor and Brian follows with a nice dive to take him out again. The fall seems to have injured Scott’s knee and Brian wins by countout.

Rating: D. I’m thinking there was something to that knee injury as there was no reason to end the match so soon. It didn’t last that long and I have no idea why this was on a pay per view. Putski is a good example of a guy who had a great look but had the big problem of being his father’s son. His dad Ivan was a popular wrestler and there was no way Scott could live up to his reputation.

Light Heavyweight Title: Brian Christopher vs. Taka Michinoku

This is a tournament final to determine the new champion. The title had actually been around for years but was only defended in Mexico and Japan while never being mentioned in American. Christopher plays to the crowd before we get going but scores with a quick slam to take over. An armdrag puts Taka down again as the Jerry’s Kid chant starts up again. Taka flips out of a German suplex and takes Brian down with a pair of kicks to the face and a clothesline to send him out to the floor. A HUGE springboard dive off the top takes Christopher out again and fires up the crowd a bit.

Brian crotches Taka on the top rope as they come back in and a dropkick sends Michinoku back to the floor. Taka avoids a dive off the apron to send Brian into the barricade but misses a cross body back inside to give Christopher control again. Now it’s Brian’s turn to miss a charge, allowing Taka to hit a tornado DDT for two. A hurricanrana sends Brian to the floor again and a top rope moonsault takes him out. Lawler goes to help his son back inside but Taka dropkicks Christopher right back down.

Back inside and a pair of dropkicks put Brian down again but Taka gets caught in a full nelson legsweep. There’s a sitout powerbomb by Christopher but he poses too much, allowing Taka to grab a rollup for two. A missile dropkick to the back of Taka’s head puts him down again and a backbreaker gets two.

Brian stays cocky by slapping Taka in the face over and over (Jerry: “Just like I slapped Andy Kaufman!”) before clotheslining him down for two. Now the release German suplex connects but Brian takes forever to cover. Instead it’s a powerslam to put Taka down but Christopher misses the top rope legdrop, allowing Taka to hit the Michinoku Driver for the pin and the title.

Rating: C. Really basic match here but it made sense to put the belt on Taka at first. Christopher was just a guy who happened to be in the weight division and never fight the style at all. The match wasn’t bad or anything but the division never worked nearly as well as the company hoped it to.

Christopher would soon hook up with his long term partner Scott Taylor to form Too Much. Interestingly enough, they were going to get the Billy and Chuck gimmick but Christopher wouldn’t go for it. Instead they got to fight Al Snow and Head at King of the Ring 1998.

Too Much vs. Al Snow/Head

Yes Head, a mannequin head, is Snow’s partner. Too Much would later be known as Too Cool. We kept hearing about Snow wanting to stay but it wouldn’t work. Snow kept getting in trouble but blaming it on Head. That’s smart at least. This is in the video recap but I don’t feel like going back and editing this to make it right. Head stole the crown and they get a meeting with Vince if they win tonight.

Scotty looks weird with short blonde hair. Christopher looks stupid no matter what. Snow is in the back and Lawler talks to them and he makes fun of them and it goes nowhere. This is pre cool music but post peak of Snow’s powers. There are however a bunch of guys with Styrofoam heads bobbing them back and forth though. Jerry is announced as the guest referee to make it three on one. Oh sorry. Three on two.

Snow’s talented enough to count I guess. Oh oddly enough, Snow used to be a character called Avatar, a genie. How sad is it that Snow is more talented than all three heels combined by about 100 miles? Taylor tags in Christopher, only a master sexay at this moment I guess. Lawler has his crown on by the way. More or less this was designed to let Snow show off, which really was a good idea and something they needed to do more often.

Snow reaches for a tag and Christopher bites his hand. I’m not sure if I want to see him in the indys or not. He was terrible in the mainstream so how bad were they in a territory based company. Ross wonders who picked Lawler as the referee. My guess would be a combination of the writing team and Vince McMahon but what do I know?

I love that wheelbarrow suplex that Snow likes to use. Snow tags in Head and Ross has lost it. Snow covers Taylor as Lawler goes to the announce table and grabs something. Christopher covers head with a bottle of Head and Shoulders for the pin. Oh it was to make sure that the shoulders were down.

Rating: D+. Well it was a cute idea I guess and Snow got to show off out there, but seriously, Too Much being on my screen more than 5 minutes just makes my head hurt so this just failed completely for me. This wasn’t much and it was really just a comedy match so take it for what it is I guess.

The team wouldn’t do much for the rest of the year and then would miss a good chunk of 1999 due to injury. One of their first major matches back, now with Brian as Grandmaster Sexay and Taylor as Scotty Too Hotty, was at Survivor Series 1999.

Team Too Cool vs. Team Edge/Christian

Too Cool, The Hollys
Edge/Christian, Hardy Boys

This is just after the Hardys and the Canadians had the first tag team ladder match which would launch them into stardom soon after. Too Cool is still stupid here, as opposed to later on when they would be stupid and WAY over. The Hardys have Terri with them which wouldn’t last long. Edge and Scotty get things started as Jerry talks about Scotty’s pants. They chop it out in the corner before things speed up a bit and Edge spinwheel kicks him down.

Off to Crash vs. Matt with Matt getting two off a suplex. Crash gets crotched on the top and punched to the floor. Grandmaster sneaks up on Matt for a sunset bomb to the floor. We unleash the dives as everyone small enough to hits a big dive to take out everyone that was already on the floor with Jeff capping it off. Back in and Christian powerslams Crash for two. The Hollys hit a Hart Attack on Crash Christian for two of their own and Hardcore is in.

We’re promised an update on Austin at the end of this match because THIS MATCH of all things is more important than a guy being hit by a car. Off to Grandmaster whose bulldog is countered and he goes flying so far that he kicks the camera, giving us a cool visual. Off to Hardcore vs. Edge who starts spearing a lot of people. Grandmaster stops to dance and is immediately speared down. In the big melee, Hardcore rolls up Edge for the pin. Fifteen seconds later, Scotty hits a top rope DDT to eliminate Matt, making it 4-2.

Jeff and Scotty do a fast pinfall reversal sequence before Scotty hits the not yet popular Worm. A sitout powerbomb by Scotty with Grandmaster assisting gets two as does a middle rope missile dropkick from Sexay. Too Cool hits the second Hart Attack of the match which gets two on Jeff. Everything breaks down but the Hollys get in an argument. Terri gets on the apron for a distraction which lets Christian hit both of Too Cool low. Jeff hits a 450 on Scotty for the elimination.

So it’s Crash/Grandmaster/Hardcore Holly vs. Jeff and Christian. JR goes on a rant about Austin as Christian and Jeff try some Poetry in Motion, but Hardcore comes off the top with a missile dropkick in a SWEET looking counter. Grandmaster adds a guillotine legdrop for the elimination. Christian immediately hits a reverse DDT on Grandmaster to get us down to Christian vs. the Hollys.

JR continues to brood and want an update about Austin. Jerry needling him makes me chuckle as he’s awesome at being a jerk. Crash beats on Christian for a bit before it’s off to Hardcore again. Back to Crash who gets caught in the Unprettier/Killswitch for the pin. Christian tries a victory roll on Hardcore but Bob (Hardcore for you schmucks out there) falls on top for the final pin.

Rating: C+. The problem here was that the pairing that this should have been based around, Edge and Christian and the Hardys, were on the same team rather than getting to tear the house down against each other. The other two teams didn’t mean anything and the ending of this sucked. Once the Dudleys got involved with the brother teams, it was all gravy for almost two years.

Too Cool would get Rikishi as their big enforcer around this time. The act was so popular that they moved pretty far up the card, including main eventing the February 7, 2000 episode of Raw in a major ten man tag.

HHH/X-Pac/Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko/Perry Saturn vs. Cactus Jack/The Rock/???/???/???

Before the bell rings, Rikishi and Too Cool come out to even the odds. It’s a wild brawl to start and I’m not even going to try to call it. Rock and HHH are fighting on the ramp as Benoit and Cactus head into the crowd (DANG that could have been an awesome feud). Stephanie is on commentary and the fans are blowing the roof off the place. Grandmaster and X-Pac get things going and Sexay misses a middle rope knee drop.

Off to Saturn and Scotty, the latter of whom has a bandage around his head. He loads up the Worm (with five hops instead of four) but Malenko interferes before Scotty can cover. A big old suplex puts Scotty down and Dean comes in legally. Scotty gets in a shot and brings in Rikishi who runs Dean over. Off to Benoit who charges right into a Samoan Drop. He can’t suplex Rikishi but Benoit pounds on his back and is all like oh yeah boy you’re going and suplexes Rikishi down.

Jack comes in and pounds Benoit down into the corner. This is one of the hottest crowds I’ve ever seen. Jack goes for HHH and they head to the announce table. Saturn and Pac have to save HHH from death and we head back inside. HHH stomps Jack down in the corner and shoves the referee away. Off to Pac who almost immediately walks into a neckbreaker to take him down.

Hot tag brings in Rock and it’s spinebusters all around. Pac takes a Rock Bottom for two as HHH saves. Saturn kicks Rock down but Rock is having none of this Bronco Buster nonsense. Grandmaster hits the Hip Hop Drop but Pac gets up and kicks the goggles off Sexay’s head. HHH comes in again with the flying knee and it’s off to Saturn and Benoit for some double teaming.

Benoit suplexes Sexay down for two and it’s back to HHH. The heels are tagging incredibly fast. Grandmaster hits a double DDT out of nowhere on Benoit and HHH. There’s the hot tag to Cactus but the referee didn’t see it. Everything breaks down and HHH hits the Pedigree on Grandmaster followed by the Swan Dive from Benoit for the pin.

Rating: B. This seems like a match where the crowd reaction carried it to a higher level which is fine. It’s certainly better than I remember but it’s not as good as I’ve seen some people make it out to be. Anyway, you could see the great matches coming and this would give Too Cool a nice push, resulting in their only tag title run a few months after this.

The feud with the Radicalz continued at Wrestlemania 2000.

Radicalz vs. Too Cool/Chyna

This would be Saturn/Malenko/Guerrero. They’re brand new at this point and Dean is already Light Heavyweight Champion. Too Cool was their first feud and it was a big enough deal that Too Cool rode it to a tag title reign in a few months. Eddie and Scotty start things off and Scott has his hat knocked off almost immediately. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts Eddie down and it’s off to Chyna, sending Guerrero running off to Dean.

Malenko loads up a fast powerbomb but Scotty clotheslines him down to break it up. Chyna and the Grandmaster suplex Malenko down and it’s time to dance. Back to Eddie to face Grandmaster with Sexay hitting a quick suplex. Saturn breaks up the top rope legdrop though and the Radicalz take over. Perry comes in legally now and steals Grandmaster’s dew rag, somehow making him look even more ridiculous.

Eddie comes back in and allows Grandmaster to make a tag to Scotty. That goes badly for the non Radicalzas Scotty charges into a hot shot followed by the slingshot hilo for no cover. Grandmaster comes back in sans tag and throws Eddie to the floor as things fall apart. Scotty loads up a double Worm on Saturn and Malenko but an Eddie distraction lets them get back up. There’s no one in the ring at the moment until we get back to Scotty vs. Eddie. Perry comes back in and superkicks Hotty down.

A top rope elbow hits Scotty but again there’s no cover. Instead it’s back to Guerrero who goes up but takes too long, allowing Scotty to crotch him. A superplex puts both guys down and there’s the hot tag to Chyna. She cleans house with handspring elbows and a double low blow to Saturn and Malenko. Eddie decks her though, breaking part of her outfit in the process. Chyna escapes a powerbomb into one of her own, grabs Eddie’s crotch and slams him down before finishing him with a sleeper drop.

Rating: D+. This didn’t work for me for the most part but the main story of Chyna vs. Eddie was advanced which is the right idea. This would wind up meaning nothing (in a way) though as Chyna would fall victim to the Latino Heat the next day, starting a summer long relationship between the two. I guess that crotch grab changed her mind.

Remember that Tag Team Title run I mentioned? It started on Raw, May 29, 2000.

Tag Team Titles: Too Cool vs. Edge and Christian

Christian cranks on Grandmaster’s arm to start but Brian fights back with a missile dropkick. Off to Scotty for some dancing and a double clothesline. Time for the Moonwalk but Christian takes Scotty down with a spinwheel kick. Edge comes in and tries a powerbomb but Scotty botches the hurricanrana counter.

Instead he has to settle for a small package for two before it’s off to Grandmaster to clean house. His powerbomb on Christian works just fine before he and Edge fall to the floor. Scotty hits the Worm on Christian as Edge brings in a title belt. He’s knocked to the floor though and here’s Kid Rock’s midget friend Joe C. with a low blow, allowing Grandmaster to hit Edge with the belt for the pin and the titles in a big upset. The celebration is as low key as you can imagine.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing to see and I’m really surprised by how bored they seemed to win the belts. The title reign wouldn’t last all that long but this was a good example of the company listening to the crowd and giving someone popular a push. Too Cool winning the belts for a month wasn’t a stretch and the fans loved it. Everybody wins.

The title win would be the apex of the team’s run as they would fall down the card soon after and never recover. Scotty would get hurt so Grandmaster would have to fight on his own, including this match at Insurrextion 2001.

Grandmaster Sexay vs. Eddie Guerrero

This is one of Grandmaster’s final appearances with the company for reasons of suck I guess. Eddie lost the European Title to Matt Hardy of all people. It’s not like being European meant anything with only Regal and Bulldog being European. Eddie would be gone soon for drugs anyway so there we are. This is a very hot crowd with one Phoenix being in attendance. Yeah he was the other request.

Eddie doing the Sexay dance is hilarious to say the least. I think Eddie was supposed to be champion here as he lost it like a week earlier. Grandmaster, how do you freaking suck so much? Your dad is a legend and you’re just a freaking joke. And that’s being nice. He’s like an annoying indy gimmick that isn’t sure what his gimmick is. The crowd is ALL OVER Eddie. That’s not bad. Grandmaster misses a…something and gets rolled up with Eddie using the ropes to win from nowhere. That was really abrupt.

Rating: D+. Uh what the heck was that? Seriously it felt like it was 3 minutes short or something. Also, what the world is the idea of using these two in a match? It’s just random as but whatever. Not bad I guess. Then again this is one of those British house shows called a pay per view so it’s to be expected.

Christopher would hit the indies, including main eventing the first WWA PPV, the Revolution in a tournament final for the World Title.

WWA World Title: Brian Christopher vs. Jeff Jarrett

I’ve complained about Christopher enough so far. Christopher makes gay jokes about Jarrett to start but says he wants to death. Jarrett tosses him around to start and there’s the strut. Christopher comes back with a clothesline to send Jeff to the floor….and then he lowers his pants. A neckbreaker puts Jarrett right back on the floor as we’re firmly in a Memphis formula: do a move, play to the crowd a lot, then do another move and play to them more.

They fight into the crowd, and by fight I mean punch once and walk a lot, and we lose track of them. Brian gets a drink thrown in his face and Jeff chokes him a bit. We finally get back to ringside with Brian shaking off everything that’s been done to him so far. A charge misses in the corner and Brian gets crotched. Naturally, Jarrett poses. A cross body gets two for Brian and it’s off to a sleeper from Jeff.

After nearly two minutes of that, Brian hooks his own sleeper for a few seconds. A kick puts Jeff down and an enziguri (clearly missing by about six inches) gets two. Tornado DDT gets two more and they head to the floor. Brian superkicks a referee by mistake and we head back in. Christopher “hits” a guillotine legdrop for two from a replacement referee…and the referees start fighting. Jeff wins with a guitar shot and Stroke on the belt (there was a referee brawl in between the moves).

Rating: D. Standard match that really was a big brawl with some wrestling moves thrown in. In other words, the WCW main event formula minus five run-ins. Christopher was never believable as a main event threat here because HE’S FREAKING BRIAN CHRISTOPHER. Nothing to see here but it was probably the best match of the second half of the show.

It would be off to TNA after this with Brian appearing on the second show.

K-Krush vs. Brian Christopher

They keep swapping between calling his Brian Christopher and Brian Lawler. Christopher does his Too Cool dance to the ring and the NASCAR guys with him look at him like the idiot he looks like. Krush is the evil one here which I doubt was clear coming into this. He jumps Christopher to start but Brian comes back with a neckbreaker. A bulldog out of the corner gets two for Brian but a second results in him getting crotched on the middle rope.

Krush suplexes him down to take over again, getting a delayed two in the process. He does the backflip into the splits into the side kick spot that he uses today for two. Off to a chinlock as this is going nowhere. Brian fights up, I guess doing what you would call Cooling Up. An enziguri puts Krush down as does a Stunner but Krush hits an atomic drop to put him down. The NASCAR guys shake the ropes to crotch Krush and he falls right into position for the guillotine legdrop from Christopher for the pin.

Rating: D. This felt like a random match between two former WWF guys, and that’s not something interesting. At the end of the day, why in the world am I supposed to care about the guy best known as K-Kwik yells at some NASCAR drivers? Christopher without his Too Cool partners isn’t interesting either, at least not outside of Memphis. Nothing to see here.

And again at the tenth show.

Brian Lawler vs. Slash

Apparently this is a scheduled match for later but we’re getting it now instead. Slash knocks him to the floor and throws Lawler into the barricade before peeling back the mats. He loads up a piledriver on the floor but Lawler backdrops him down to prevent presumably death. Lawler knocks Slash down and we head up the ramp for a bulldog on the ramp by Lawler. Brian tries to get a chair from a fan but the fan won’t give it up.

Back in and Slash grabs a superplex for two, followed by what we would call the Eye of the Storm. Lawler comes back with a floatover DDT but stops to dance instead of covering. There’s an enziguri from Brian and there’s even more dancing. Both guys hit the other low (in front of the referee who is cool with this I guess) before Slash puts Lawler on top. Brian knocks him down and hits the guillotine legdrop for the pin.

Rating: D. This didn’t quite work because Lawler is really hard to care about. I have no idea if he’s a face or if he’s a heel here and the lack of clarity is really annoying after awhile. Also, the dancing thing is dead but he keeps doing it anyway because it used to work a few years ago. Slash and the Disciples of the New Church continue their free fall as well.

After several more years in the indies, Christopher would fall off radar for a good while. He would eventually return to the WWE on Old School Raw, January 6, 2014.

3MB vs. Too Cool/Rikishi

This is as obvious of a match as you can get. Grandmaster and Jinder get things going with Grandmaster scoring with a quick dropkick. Off to Scotty who is still in good shape but gets punched down by McIntyre. Drew misses a charge in the corner and the bulldog sets up the WORM. Slater robs us of our gratification though and 3MB takes over again. The announcers spend the entire match arguing over whether Too Cool can be called the Hip Hop Twins, thereby making the whole thing about them instead of the legends.

Scotty clotheslines McIntyre down and makes the hot tag to Rikishi who looks incredibly slow. He does manage a superkick to Mahal for two but Slater makes the save. Rikishi clotheslines two Band members down and the Hip Hop Drop takes out McIntyre. Mahal tries a sunset flip on Rikishi but gets sat on for the pin at 5:24.

Rating: D+. The match sucked and the commentary was annoying, but this is exactly what modern nostalgia should be about. Too Cool is an act that’s old enough for people to reminisce but not old enough that they embarrass themselves in the ring. Nobody is hurt, the fans get to have a fun moment and everybody wins. Good stuff.

This appearance got Too Cool a surprise spot on the first NXT special called Arrival.

NXT Tag Titles: Ascension vs. ???

There’s an open challenge from Ascension tonight and their opponents are…….TOO COOL??? That’s a rather bizarre choice to put it mildly. Viktor slaps Sexay down to start and doesn’t approve of the dancing. Off to Konor for a hard legdrop and even harder shoulder blocks. Viktor slams Sexay down and puts on a chinlock before driving in elbows. I think the fans say they want water and then gum. Sexay finally fights up and makes the hot tag to Scotty whose offense has very little effect. He gets the bulldog and loads up the Worm, only to have Viktor pop up and run him over. Fall of Man ends Scotty at 6:40.

Rating: D. This was WAY too long and Too Cool was the totally wrong choice for the challengers here. They’re a fun team who had a month long title reign FOURTEEN YEARS AGO. This is the problem with nostalgia: it’s fun to push every now and then, but when it’s pushed over teams that deserve the shots more, you’ve got a problem.

Brian Christopher is a guy who tried to get out of his dad’s shadow but only succeeded to a degree. His run in Too Cool is definitely the high point of his career and the crowd ate the act up. Brian’s talking in Memphis was great stuff but at the end of the day that act just didn’t work outside of the territory. Still though, he certainly wasn’t terrible and could fly well enough to get by.

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Wrestler of the Day – May 2: The Rock

Time for another one that needs no introduction. It’s the Rock.

 

This is another instance where there are too many great matches to pick from to do the time line so it’s whatever order these come to me in.

We’ll start with Rock returning to the company (again) and getting a title match against CM Punk, who had held the title 434 days coming into the match. From Royal Rumble 2013.

Raw World Title: The Rock vs. CM Punk

Punk of course has Heyman with him. He charges right into the brawl and actually pounds Rock down into the corner. A quick Rock Bottom is countered but Punk is sent outside. Rock follows him outside and sends the champion into the barricade before loading up the announce table. Punk comes back with a shot to the ribs and puts the table back together in a great bit. Back in and Rock scores with more right hands to knock Punk to the floor again.

Punk is whipped into the barricade one more time but he gets a boot up to stop a charging Bull. He finishes fixing the announce table instead of following up on Rock before dropping Rock ribs first on the barricade. They head inside again for a body vice from CM followed by a knee to the ribs for two. Off to a freaky looking hold where Punk pins Rock’s shoulders down but pulls back on his head to crank on the shoulders and back.

More choking follows and a knee to the back has Rock on the apron, followed by a springboard dropkick to send him outside. Punk tries a top rope ax handle to take Rock down but injures his knee in the process. Rock scores with some kicks to the knee but the champion easily sends him out to the floor to stop the comeback. Back in and Punk misses the springboard clothesline and reinjures the knee, giving Rock his opening.

A DDT gets one on Punk but he fights out of the Rock Bottom. The GTS is countered into a Sharpshooter attempt but Punk counters into the Anaconda Vice in a nice sequence. Rock rolls over into a cradle, forcing Punk to let go of the hold. Back up and tries the Rock Bottom but Punk counters into a rollup for two, only to be countered into a low seated Sharpshooter. Punk is next to the rope so naturally he takes thirty seconds to get the break.

Rock takes him to the floor and loads up the announce table again. They fight on top but Rock counters a GTS attempt into what was supposed to be a Rock Bottom but was really more like the table collapsing with Rock’s arm around Punk’s chest. Rock comes up holding his knee and both guys make it back in at an eight count. Punk scores with a high kick but both guys are down.

Back up and Rock wins a slugout before scoring with the spinebuster. He loads up the People’s Elbow and there go the lights. Cole can see Shield pulling Rock to the floor and powerbombing him through the table. The lights come back up and Rock is laid out as the referee has no idea what’s going on. The announcers try to tell Mike Chioda what happened and Punk feigns innocence.

He throws Rock back in for the pin and celebrates but here’s Vince to say Punk is stripped of the title for the interference. Rock says no and to restart the match. The bell rings again and Punk stomps away as JBL threatens to put Cole through a table for playing cheerleader. The Macho Elbow gets two but the GTS is countered into a spinebuster, setting up the People’s Elbow to end Punk’s reign.

Rating: B. It’s another good match but it felt like they were dancing around for twenty three minutes before we got to the obvious ending. The Shield stuff was a decent fake out but it really didn’t need to be there. Rock winning was obvious though and that really put a ceiling on how high this was going to get.

Rock’s first Wrestlemania main event was at Wrestlemania 15, where he was basically Vince’s avatar against Austin.

WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Vince is guest referee due to the issues earlier tonight. Oh wait here’s Shawn Michaels, the Commissioner, to say that Vince isn’t referee and that it’s going to be a normal referee. The Corporation is barred from ringside as well. Rock is defending if that wasn’t really clear. The place of course goes INSANE for Austin, who for some reason is in an Austin t-shirt instead of the trademark vest. It’s a brawl to start as you would expect with Austin being knocked out to the floor and sent into the announce table. Apparently Vince does have the power to make this No DQ.

Back in for more punching by Rock but he gets backdropped up and over to the floor a second later. They brawl into the crowd where we can barely see them but it’s Philly so it has to be expected. Austin blasts the Rock in the back and they head back to ringside. Scratch that as they’re already going back into the crowd on the other side of the arena. Back to ringside again and Austin is choked with a cable for a bit.

Now they fight up the aisle with Austin hitting a fast clothesline. Austin loads up a piledriver on the concrete, only to be backdropped onto a light instead. Rock is thrown into some kind of equipment and they clothesline each other. Now it’s Rock being choked by a cable and then being thrown into the Wrestlemania XV sign, which wobbles in a scary sight. Rock suplexes Austin in the aisle and spits some water in his face at the announce table. Austin drops him face first onto the barricade before laying him on the announce table for an elbow drop which doesn’t break anything.

The second attempt at an elbow puts Rock through the table and we head back into the ring after about eight minutes of brawling. Wait Rock bails to the floor and wraps Austin’s bad knee around the post. They’re still not ready to stay in the ring as Austin sends Rock into the steps and stomps away a bit more. NOW we head back inside but Austin walks into the Rock Bottom for two. Rock brings in a chair but Austin takes it away and cracks the referee with it by mistake.

A Stunner is blocked and Rock elbows Austin down before laying him out with the chair. Another referee comes in for a two count off a chair shot to the head. Off to a chinlock for an understandably needed breather. Austin fights back up, only to be clotheslined right back down. Back to el chinlock but they fight up again, only for the referee to go down AGAIN. The Stunner hits but Earl Hebner runs down for a very close two. Here’s Vince again as Austin gets a fresh chair.

The distraction lets Rock hit Austin low to block a chair shot and Vince gets in as well. Vince drops Hebner and it’s a double team beatdown on Austin. Cue a hobbled Mick Foley to beat up Vince and count a fast two on Rock. The Thesz Press takes Rock down but Rock comes back with a clothesline and another Rock Bottom. Austin avoids the Elbow, fights out of another Rock Bottom, and Stuns his way to a third world title.

Rating: B-. This one really depends on your taste. They didn’t try to have a regular match here at all and maybe that was the right idea. It’s definitely the weakest of the Austin vs. Rock at Wrestlemania trilogy but Rock wasn’t ready to hang with Austin in a match like this year. The rematch at Backlash would be AWESOME to make up for this, but even this wasn’t bad. It’s very typical of the time, which doesn’t make it dull. This was definitely entertaining, but it’s certainly not for everyone.

We’ll jump ahead to 2004 for a match I somehow skipped on Orton’s entry in this series. From Wrestlemania XX.

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

It’s Flair/Orton/Batista here and Orton is Intercontinental Champion. The brawl is on to start with Rock fighting the young guys and Flair getting punched by Foley. Evolution is knocked out to the floor until we start with Rock vs. Flair. Rock immediately elbows him down and does the Flair strut to send Naitch to the floor. A backdrop puts Flair down and they fight to the floor, only to have Ric get caught in another backdrop. Foley drops an elbow off the apron and Evolution is in trouble to start.

Foley wants to come in to face Orton but Randy immediately bails to the floor to great heat. We finally get inside for the fight that people want to see as Foley pounds away and puts Orton in the Tree of Woe. Off to Rock who punches Orton in the “stomach” before clotheslining him down for no cover. Ric gets clipped in the back of the head by Flair which draws him into the corner, sending the fight to the floor. Batista drops Rock face first onto the barricade to take over.

Back in and Batista pounds on Rock, dropping him down with an elbow for two. Flair comes in again to chop at Rock before going up with even Lawler making fun of Flair for it never working. Big Dave comes in again to pound on Rock but the Brahma Bull gets over to the corner to bring in Foley. Mick pounds away on Batista and punches him down in the corner, only to be taken down by Batista’s big running clothesline. Foley goes after Orton on the floor but Flair jumps him to stop the comeback.

As is his custom, Flair is sent knees first into the steps, causing some cringing pain. Back in and Orton drops knees on Foley’s head before it’s back to Flair for a hard chop. That’s all for Ric right now and it’s back to Orton for a reverse chinlock. Batista takes Orton’s place and pounds away with rights and lefts, only to be caught in a quick Mandible Claw. Batista escapes but gets caught in a swinging neckbreaker. That’s STILL not enough for the hot tag to Rock though, and the crowd continues to want it more and more. A quick right hand to Flair is enough for the tag to Rock though, and the reaction isn’t all that great.

Rock cleans house with everything he can but walks into a spinebuster by Batista. Instead of a cover though, we get the People’s Elbow from Naitch, complete with strut! The elbow doesn’t have a chance to be launched though as Rock nips up and pounds away on Flair with right hands. The spinebuster sets up the real Elbow with Rock strutting for two. Another tag brings in Orton who walks right into a Rock Bottom for two. The big clothesline puts Rock down and there’s the Batista Bomb for good measure.

That gets two for Randy but Rock drops him again, allowing for the tag to Foley and there’s the pop we were waiting for. Evolution is knocked down and there’s the double arm DDT to Orton. Mr. Socko returns but Orton SNAPS off an RKO for the pin out of nowhere. The look of shock on Orton’s face and Foley getting up and three and a half and looking around as if to say “what happened” are great touches.

Rating: B. Very solid match here with all five guys feeling it at Wrestlemania. The ending is perfect and makes Orton look all the better as he got the fall on a fresh Foley with the RKO out of nowhere. This led to a great match at Backlash which cemented Orton as a player. This was also Rock’s last match for seven and a half years. Great match though and well worth checking out for a lesson in how to give a perfect rub.

Here’s the match that should have main evented Wrestlemania XVI. From Backlash 2000.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. Triple H

HHH is champion, Vince is in his corner, Shane is guest referee, Stephanie is HOT in a little dark blue dress. Vince points out the card subject to change line in the program, which means that Austin isn’t here. Slugout to start and Rock knocks him down after a delay into the spit punch. Rock stomps him down in the corner but Shane drags him off. Brahma Bull charges at HHH but gets sent to the floor.

HHH sends him into the steps and then the announce table. Vince posts Rock and throws him back in as the odds are stacked very high already. That only gets two, as do the suplex and knee drop. HHH hooks on a long chinlock and puts his feet on the top rope. Shane has been leaving his eyes elsewhere of course. Rock finally gets up and drops HHH onto the buckle to escape. He fires off right hands and they clothesline each other.

Rock knocks him into the corner but Vince pops up with a belt shot to put him down for a very close two. Rock gets up and throws HHH to the floor where he may have hurt his arm. Back in the ring Rock hits a spinning DDT but Shane won’t count. Rock goes after Shane and they head to the floor where HHH gets in a shot to take over. Pedigree through the table is countered by a low blow but Shane doesn’t DQ him for some reason. Instead he gets up on the table too and it’s a DOUBLE ROCK BOTTOM through the table.

Both guys are half dead but Rock gets up first. There’s no referee, but it doesn’t really matter as Shane wouldn’t count a pin anyway. Vince gets in the ring with the guys and hits Rock in the back. That goes badly as you would expect because HHH gets back up and hits a Pedigree. Here are Patterson and Brisco to count but Rock kicks out. The Stooges pound on Rock and HHH gets in some shots too. His arm is clearly hurt.

Vince hits Rock in the head with a chair so hard that he falls down too. CUE GLASS SHATTER! Austin, to a MASSIVE pop, comes out with a chair and murders everyone in sight. Everyone is down so Austin leaves as Linda and the recently fired Earl Hebner come out. Stephanie gets shoved down and it’s a spinebuster and the People’s Elbow to give Rock the title back.

Rating: B+. Why this didn’t happen at Wrestlemania I’m not sure. Either way, it happened here and it was GREAT. This was the Attitude Era formula of throw EVERYTHING out there but give the fans what they want in the end. That makes the wild brawling ok and it gives Rock the title back, which is how it should be. Austin’s pop was incredible and thankfully for Rock’s time on top, Austin wouldn’t be back to action for about six more months.

Austin lost the title to both Undertaker and Kane in September 1998 and we needed a new champion. The solution was of course a tournament, with Rock in the finals at Survivor Series 1998.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Mankind

Vince and Shane are back and are talking with Boss Man backstage. Feeling out process to start as Lawler makes fun of Halloween Havoc going off the air earlier a few weeks prior to this. Rock gets two off a clothesline and they head to the floor quickly. Rock gets rammed into the steps and Mankind takes over. Back inside for a chinlock as the McMahons come out. JR is very annoyed at various things and he vents a bit as they come to the ring. A suplex gets Rock out of the hold and Mankind is sent outside.

Rock suplexes Mankind on the floor but he has to go after the McMahons a bit. Into the crowd we go with Rock in control. He backdrops Mankind back to ringside and we head into the ring for a Rock chinlock. Mankind fights back up and hits a Cactus Clothesline to take it back to the floor. A chair takes Rock down again and Mankind gets the steps, only to have them knocked down onto him. Rock pounds on the steps on Mankind with the chair before cracking Mankind over the head with the chair.

That gets two back in the ring but Mankind kicks Rock low to take over again. Rock is sent back to the floor for the elbow off the apron. Mankind starts taking the announce table apart as JR loses it even more. Mankind is heel for the most part coming in but he’s a sympathetic heel. A legdrop on the table mostly misses Rock but it gets two back inside. Off to the chinlock again and Rock’s comeback is cut short by a backdrop to the floor again.

Back in again and Rock hits a DDT to put both guys down. Mankind sends him to the floor AGAIN but a middle rope elbow to the floor sends the masked one through the announce table. The crash looked great if nothing else. We head back inside and the People’s Elbow gets two. A double arm DDT puts Rock down and here’s Socko. Rock hangs on in the Claw forever and comes out of it with a Rock Bottom but it only gets a delayed two. Rock puts on the Sharpshooter and Vince says ring the bell just like last year, giving Rock the title, because Rock is Corporate. He’s also the new champion.

Rating: C-. This definitely wasn’t their best performance with the constant going to the floor getting old fast. Mankind would have his day but it would take awhile to get there. This was all about the shock which shouldn’t be a shock when you think about it. All night it was assumed that Mankind was the Corporate guy, but let’s look at this.

Rock’s first match was against a corporate guy and he just happens to get the easiest pin ever. Then a corporate guy throws in a nightstick so Rock can beat another corporate guy. Then Rock wins by DQ, and now this. That’s establishing a story and giving clues instead of an illogical swerve. It’s easy to tell which is better as this is shocking, but also MAKES SENSE. This is what Russo was capable of, but we almost never got to see it.

While we’re at Survivor Series, let’s take a look at the 1996 edition where Rock made his WWF debut.

Team Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Team Marc Mero

Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Jerry Lawler, Goldust, Crush
Marc Mero, Jake Roberts, The Stalker, Rocky Maivia

I think you know everyone here. Stalker is Barry Windham as a kind of military guerrilla warfare character. This is Rocky’s debut, so who do you think the focus is going to be on? Lawler and Roberts are feuding as well. Mero has Sable with him here. Sunny immediately freaks out on JR for suggesting Sable is hotter. She yells about being natural while Sable is about to melt near the fireworks. Rocky’s outfit looks ridiculous with kind of a cape but made of streamers that goes over his chest as well. Apparently Roberts was a surprise partner and the replacement for Henry.

Jake comes out with the big yellow snake sans bag and chases the team off with it. Goldust and Mero get things going with Marc cranking on the arm. They both block hiptosses so Mero rolls him up for two. Off to Stalker who is now just a guy in camo pants and a WWF t-shirt. Back to Mero to fire off a bunch of hiptosses to Goldie who is a bit calmer than he was last year. Rollup gets two for Mero and it’s back to the arm. Stalker pounds away at Goldie’s ribs before it’s off to HHH. Off to Mero to face Crush as HHH wanted nothing to do with Wildman (Mero).

Mero grabs the arm and for you trivia guys out there, Rocky’s first official time in a WWF ring is against Crush. It lasts all of six seconds before it’s off to Lawler who is immediately punched, kicked in the face, and knocked to the floor. You know Lawler is going to go insane with the selling too. Lawler wants nothing to do with Rocky so it’s off to HHH. Vince explains that Rocky’s name is Dwayne Johnson and that he took the name of his father and grandfather to come up with Rocky Maivia.

In the first of many matches, HHH stomps away in the corner and JR is in football mode. Goldust comes in and drops an elbow followed by some rights to the head. Crush comes in and works on the back for a bit before it’s off to Lawler. Back to HHH as Sunny makes fun of Vince for allegedly having a toupee. Rocky pounds away and backdrops HHH before it’s off to Roberts.

Jake beats up everyone but tries to get to Lawler instead of going after the legal HHH. The shortarm clothesline takes HHH down but the DDT doesn’t work. Off to Lawler who makes fun of Roberts for being an alcoholic. Lawler keeps doing it and there’s the DDT for the first elimination. Goldust comes in next as JR makes fun of the lack of tan on Roberts. We hit the chinlock for a bit until jawbreaker gets Jake out of it. Off to Stalker as JR and Sunny talk about Barry wearing lucky boots. Crush hits Stalker in the back and the Curtain Call (reverse suplex drop) gets the pin for Goldust to tie things up.

Mero comes in immediately to hit a knee lift to take over. Goldie gets in a shot and HHH finally comes in to beat on the other captain. A backbreaker puts Mero down and it’s back to Crush. This is during Crush’s gang member phase and he couldn’t look more out of place with his partners at this point. A legdrop gets two for Crush and it’s off to Goldie. Back to Crush for another backbreaker for two. Things are slowing down a bit here.

HHH comes in again and puts on an abdominal stretch. He gets caught holding the ropes and hiptossed out as is his custom with referees. A sunset flip can’t get HHH down before he makes the tag to Goldust. HHH is back in about five seconds later and let’s look at Sunny! Ok I can’t complain about that one as much. Jake is pulled in sans tag, allowing Mero to hit a moonsault press on HHH for the elimination. That was a very messy sequence with all the tags with nothing happening between them and the non-tag to Jake. Either that or I missed a tag and Mero was totally illegal when he pinned HHH.

It’s Mero/Rocky/Roberts vs. Crush/HHH. Crush comes in next and is almost immediately dropkicked out to the floor. Mero loads up a dive but Goldust makes a save and shoves Crush out of the way. Back inside, Crush’s Heart Punch (exactly what it sounds like) pins Mero. We were looking at a replay when it happened though so that’s hearsay. Roberts comes in, misses the short clothesline and is Heart Punched out as well.

We’re left with Rocky (who actually gets a face chant in MSG at this point) vs. Goldust and Crush. He starts with the one not painted like an Academy Award and accepts a Test of Strength for some reason. A small package out of nowhere gets two for Maivia and here’s Goldust again. Rocky cross bodies Crush for no count as both bad guys are in the ring at once. Goldust hits Rocky low which isn’t illegal apparently but Crush Heart Punches Goldie. Cross body pins Crush and about thirty seconds later, a shoulder breaker (Rocky’s original finisher) gets the final pin.

Rating: C+. This dragged a bit in the middle, but it accomplished three goals: Roberts got to knock Lawler out cold, Mero got to pin HHH to continue their feud, and Rocky got to debut strongly. The problem is the rest of the match wasn’t much to see. Maivia winning over guys like Crush and Goldust is a good thing because it’s unrealistic to have him beat the IC Champion and beating Lawler doesn’t mean anything because Lawler is a career jobber in the WWF. Crush is a big imposing guy who is also a jobber, but at least he looks intimidating. Goldust has credentials too and a loss isn’t going to hurt him. Smart booking.

Wrestlemania XV’s main event wasn’t the best match in the world and a lot of people have chalked it up to Rock’s nerves. Here’s a rematch on a slightly smaller stage: In Your House 28.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Steve Austin

This is no holds barred with Shane McMahon as referee and Austin loses the title if he touches Shane. Rock, still in possession of the Smoking Skull belt, gets a big pop of his own but of course it pales in comparison to Austin’s. Austin pounds away in the corner to start as the fans are immediately into this. Rock comes back with right hands of his own as the Smoking Skull belt is taken to the back. Austin hits the Thesz Press and the middle finger elbow for one.

The champion gets sent to the floor and clotheslined down before they head up to the entrance. Austin tries a comeback but gets whipped through a fence, knocking part of the set over in the process. Rock’s suplex is countered into one of his own to give Austin the advantage again. Now it’s Rock being sent into the pile of the set and clotheslined down on top of it. Rock is whipped through a barricade and gets rammed in the head by a rolling anvil case for good measure.

The Corporate one comes back by sending Austin into a camera and clotheslining him down. We shift momentum again with Austin slamming rock down on the concrete and whipping him into the steps back at ringside. Back inside and Austin stomps away in the corner, only to be reprimanded by Shane. The distraction lets Rock charge at Austin and get backdropped up and over to the floor in a big crash. Austin loads up a piledriver through the Spanish announce table but gets countered into a Rock Bottom instead.

Both guys are down with Shane telling Rock how excellent that was. Rock gets on Spanish commentary and calls Austin trash (in English) as Shane throws him a chair. Austin kicks him in the ribs to block the shot and they head back into the crowd for another clothesline to the champion. A low blow keeps Austin in trouble and Rock lays him across the announce table before taking over a camera for more comedy. Rock looks out at the crowd but pans back to Austin flipping him off and hitting a Stunner through the announce table. Nice idea there.

Both guys are down at ringside as we get a replay of the Stunner, this time entirely from Rock’s perspective. Back inside and Austin tries another Stunner but Rock shoves him into Shane. There’s the Rock Bottom for a close two after Shane put Rock’s hand on Austin’s chest. Shane grabs the belt (the regular one, not the Smoking Skull) but accidentally hits Rock. Austin covers for two but Shane flips Austin off at two. Shane starts bailing up the aisle but here are Vince and another referee. Vince knocks Shane out with the Smoking Skull belt and Austin hits a Stunner and belt shot to Rock’s head to retain the title.

Rating: B+. This was a solid Attitude Era style brawl and the match that should have happened at Wrestlemania. The ending is more shades of gray than I prefer with Vince helping his mortal enemy to take out his new enemy. That’s just not something Vince would do, especially with what’s coming in the near future.

Here’s a match that doesn’t need an introduction. It’s the real main event of Wrestlemania XVIII.

Hollywood Hogan vs. The Rock

Both guys get solid pops as this is an old WWF city, which means Hogan could set fire to a kitten orphanage and still be popular. The pre match chants seem to favor Hulk, but here are some Rock fans to counter them. They stare at each other and there’s the loudest pop for an opening bell I can remember. Hogan shoves him down to start and the fans go NUTS. You can tell Hogan is feeling it here. After a quick headlock Hogan runs him over and poses, sending the crowd further into a frenzy.

A clothesline puts Rock down as the crowd is almost completely one sided. Rock comes back with a jumping clothesline and the fans boo him out of the freaking building. Rock says just bring it and knocks Hogan to the floor with some right hands. Back in and Rock loads up the Rock Bottom but Hogan escapes and elbows out of it. He rakes his boot over Rock’s eyes to another big pop. There’s another big HOGAN chant for good measure.

A belly to back suplex gets two for Hulk and there’s an abdominal stretch for good measure. Hulk even adds in a rollup for two before raking Rock’s back. Rock escapes and comes back with some chops in the corner but walks into a chokeslam of all things from Hulk. He sends Rock out to the floor as this is still almost one sided so far. Rock goes face first into the steps and dropped on the barricade for good measure.

Hogan starts loading up the announce table but Rock fights back with right hands. Rock gets a chair but the referee takes it away, allowing Hogan to clothesline Rock down. Back inside and Rock is sent into the referee. Rock comes back with a lame spinebuster and the Sharpshooter. Hulk makes the rope but there’s no referee. Rock pulls him to the middle of the ring but there’s still no referee.

The fans just lay into Rock now with the Rocky Sucks chants as he checks on the referee. Hogan hits him low though and gets a pretty freaking good Rock Bottom for two. Hogan takes off his weightlifting belt to whip Rock’s back but Rock comes back with a DDT. There’s the Rock Bottom but Hogan HULKS UP. The fans absolutely lose their minds now as Hogan shakes his finger and hits the big boot, but the legdrop only gets two. Another big boot hits but the second legdrop misses. There’s the Rock Bottom again and a third for good mesaure. Rock nips up and hits the People’s Elbow to end it.

Rating: B. This is a hard one to grade but I think it’s a lot like the Hogan vs. Warrior match in the same building: the crowd carries it to a much higher level than it deserves to be at which is just fine. The crowd was completely eating up the nostalgia and there’s nothing at all wrong with that. Hogan would get one of the longest ovations in history the next night in Montreal and those two reactions were enough to put the world title on him for a month soon after this. It wasn’t the best idea in the world, but given those reactions I can understand why they did it. This was a very fun match and should have been the main event.

Post match they stare each other down with Hogan holding his ribs. Hogan extends his hand and Rock gladly shakes it. Hulk lets Rock pose but here are the Outsiders. They yell at Hogan and beat him down, but Rock runs back in for the save. Hall and Nash are dispatched and Rock and Hogan stand tall, apparently having made up after Hogan HIT ROCK WITH A HAMMER AND CRUSHING HIM WITH A SEMITRUCK. Rock has Hogan pose for the fans after the match in another nostalgia moment.

If you’ve read my work over the years, you know I generally hate triple threat matches. Here’s one I like, from Vengeance 2002.

Undertaker vs. The Rock vs. Kurt Angle

Taker, defending here, wants to fight Rock but is afraid to actually do anything about it. Angle shoves both guys and wants to fight which earns him a double beatdown. Rock clotheslines him out to the floor, leaving himself all alone with Undertaker. Taker pounds Rock in the corner but Rock makes a quick comeback with right hands of his own. Angle is knocked off the apron and out to the floor but he pulls the champion out with him, sending Taker into the steps.

It’s Rock vs. Angle now and there’s a belly to belly for the Brahma Bull. Angle chops away in the corner and drops Rock with another suplex. A DDT gets two for Rock and Angle rolls to the floor. Rock goes out as well leaving only the referee in the ring. Undertaker pops up and takes Angle’s head off with a clothesline and heads back inside to pound on Rock. Angle is punched off the apron by Undertaker but the champion walks into a chokeslam from Rock (you read that right) for two.

Angle is back in now but gets taken down and put in the ankle lock by the other challenger. Kurt pops up and Rock Bottoms the Rock for two as Undertaker makes the save. Angle tries the Slam on Undertaker but Taker escapes and hits the Angle Slam on Kurt. Rock nips up and sends Angle to the floor before hitting the spinebuster and People’s Elbow on Taker. Kurt pulls Rock out of the ring again and gets two on Taker, only to be launched into the corner and pounded on by the champ.

Kurt fights back but misses a charge, going shoulder first into the post, sending him out to the floor. Undertaker sends him face first into the post for good measure but here’s Rock with a spit of water into Taker’s face to slow him down. The champ throws Rock over the announcer’s table but here’s a busted open Kurt to keep things moving. Taker slugs him down again though and drops a leg on the apron before heading back inside. Old School puts Angle down but Rock makes another save.

Rock still can’t get any extended offense on Undertaker though as the champion hits a running DDT for two. Angle grabs a chair but Taker punches him down. Kurt gets ping ponged back and forth between the other guy guys, only to have Rock hit Undertaker low to put him down. That plus a chair shot to the head put Undertaker down and Angle lays out Rock with the Slam as well. A slightly damaged referee counts two on each guy for Angle but there’s the Sharpshooter from Rock to Kurt.

Taker makes a quick save with a big boot to Rock’s face and hits the Last Ride powerbomb but Kurt breaks up the cover with the ankle lock. Undertaker finally rolls through to counter and we get the same sequence from the July 4th show with Angle countering the powerbomb into the choke. Angle gets his shoulder up and even another powerbomb can’t break the hold.

Undertaker doesn’t tap but his arm is lifted and dropped twice in a row. Rock makes the save but gets caught in the ankle lock but Rock rolls Angle up for two. There’s the chokeslam to Angle but Taker gets a Rock Bottom for two. Angle hits the Slam on Undertaker and takes down the straps but walks into the Rock Bottom for the pin and the title.

Rating: B. Sometimes the solution to the problems a wrestling company is having is to have a good wrestling match. Instead of the old and slow guys in the world title scene, this had two young guys who could move very well out there to bounce off Undertaker’s power moves. This is easily the best PPV title match so far this year other than maybe Rock vs. Jericho.

I know this was listed on Cena’s entry about nine days ago, but how can I leave this off?

And now, it is time.

We recap Rock vs. Cena which is at least a year in the making. Something like seven years ago Cena insulted Rock in an interview, so when Rock came back to be guest host last year, he insulted Cena in his return promo. The night after Wrestlemania, Cena had challenged Rock to a one on one match at THIS Wrestlemania. This led to a year of build (minus six months for Rock to make a movie of course) which got me to the point where I HAD to see this match. I didn’t know if it was going to be great, if it was going to suck, or somewhere in between, but I needed to see it. That’s never happened to me as a fan before.

Diddy comes out to bring out MGK (a rapper) to perform some song called Invincible. He does this stupid monologue about how Cena is a huge underdog in this, despite Cena being active having more experience overall than Rock. Cena is booed out of the building but gives something to an old lady who apparently is related to some Hall of Famer. We should be ready for Rock’s entrance, but first we need Flo-Rida to perform two songs. I remember SCREAMING to get to it at this point. Oh and Flo has a bunch of dancers with him, presumably the same girls who were in the Bridge Club ten minutes ago.

John Cena vs. The Rock

Rock’s ovation is thunderous. There’s really no other way to put it as it’s very clear who the fans are for here. During the big match intros, Cena is booed even further out of the stadium. They stare each other down and FINALLY the bell rings. Cena shoves him away to start and the dueling chants begin. They lock up again and this time Cena goes flying. Rock grabs a headlock before they fight over arm control.

A few armdrags put Cena down and a cradle gets a quick two for Cena. Cena has to make sure it wasn’t three as he looks a bit shaken. Back up and John leapfrogs over Rock before taking him down with a headlock takeover. They get up again and Rock tries a quick Sharpshooter but Cena bails to the floor. Rock decks him as he gets back in but Cena charges at him in the corner with a hard shoulder to the ribs. Cena gets a quick one count off a clothesline before putting on a bearhug on the mat.

Back up and Rock punches away but gets low bridged out to the floor. Cena drops him ribs first onto the barricade and announce table before going to the ring for a seat. When Rock won’t quit Cena throws him back inside and gets a two count. We’re definitely in another gear now. Off to a bearhug on Rock’s bad ribs but he won’t quit. Rock finally comes back with right hands to escape and a DDT for two.

Rock wins a quick slugout and hits the spinebuster but Cena picks the leg to break up the Elbow. Cena comes back with his finishing sequence but the AA is escaped. A double clothesline puts both guys down as they take a breather. After a few moments on the mat they slug it out with Cena punching Rock down to his knees. Rock fires off more punches and does You Can’t See Me before trying the spit punch, only to get caught in the AA for a close two.

Cena goes to pick Rock up but takes the Rock Bottom for two for the Brahma Bull. Rock stomps away in the corner but walks into a side slam for two. John goes up top for a very delayed top rope Fameasser for another near fall. Rock comes back with a spinebuster into the Sharpshooter but he doesn’t have it on well. Cena crawls to the rope so Rock lets go and pounds away. Back to the Sharpshooter (why don’t more people do that? Even if Cena won’t quit you can still do more damage) but Cena makes the rope immediately again. Gee maybe if he had pulled Cena from the rope it would have been harder to escape.

Rock fires off some elbows to the chest and sends Cena into the steps for good measure. Back inside and Cena tries a sunset flip of all things but immediately shifts into the STF in the middle of the ring. Cena drags him back to the middle of the ring and Rock is starting to fade. We get an old school arm check and Rock holds it up on the third drop. I love stuff like that. Rock makes it to the ropes and as they get back up, Cena walks into a Samoan drop to put both guys down.

Another slugout goes to Rock and the spinebuster sets up the Elbow……for TWO. The place is losing their minds on these kickouts and can you blame them a bit? Both guys are spent here but Cena hits a catapult into the corner for two. With nothing left to try, Cena loads up the middle rope AA but Rock shoves him off and tries a top rope cross body but Cena rolls through into the BIG AA for an even closer two. Cena begs the referee to call it three. That gets him nowhere so Cena loads up a People’s Elbow. As he hits the second rope, Rock nips up and hits the Rock Bottom for the shocking pin.

Rating: A+. What else do you want from this? This is one of those matches which could have gone either way as they beat the tar out of each other. They had the big fight atmosphere down to perfection here and while the ending is still questionable (yet not completely wrong), it’s exactly what you want a Wrestlemania main event to be. This somehow surpassed the hype and was excellent in every sense of the word.

Cena sits on the ramp, stunned.

Rock poses to end the show.

I have to have a Foley match on here. From In Your House 27.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Mankind

Last man standing meaning there are no pins but the first person to not answer a ten count loses. Also remember Mankind has a bad knee coming in. Mankind turns his back on the Rock to intentionally allow him a cheap shot to start but Rock goes after the bad knee in a smart move. Mankind lets him do it again and Rock blasts him in the back of the head but this time Mankind blasts Rock in the face with the title belt for an eight count.

They fight up to the entrance with Mankind being whipped into a piece of the set. Mankind finds a table near the production arena and DDTs Rock through it for a nine count. Now we head over to some tarped off bleachers for nothing of note before Rock suplexes Mankind onto the exposed concrete. Back to ringside with Rock being whipped into the stairs for a five count before heading back inside. Mankind slams him down and loads up his own version of the People’s Elbow but only hits mat.

Back to the floor again for another suplex on the floor, allowing Rock to go over to the announce table to offer Mankind a Rock Burger with some Rock Sauce on the side. The champion dives across the table to take Rock out before laying him on the announce table and dropping him to the floor with an elbow from the apron. Mankind rips at Rock’s face before throwing both Rock and the steps back inside.

Rock kicks them back into Mankind’s face before bringing in a chair to fire away at Mankind’s knee. Rock misses a big chair shot by hitting the ropes, knocking it back into his face instead. The Cactus Clothesline puts both guys on the floor again and Mankind drags him back to the announce table. He loads up a piledriver through the table but Rock backdrops him off the table and into the timekeeper’s table to hurt the leg even worse. Just to further the injury, Rock goes inside and throws the steps over the top rope to land on Mankind again.

Somehow Mankind gets up again so Rock takes him back inside for the People’s Elbow. Rock grabs the microphone to talk more trash and sing a little Smackdown Hotel. Mankind apparently doesn’t like Elvis tributes and puts on the Mandible Claw but the referee is taken out. Mankind gets him back to the ring and helps start the count but Rock gets up at nine with a low blow.

Rock hits a DDT but Mankind is up at seven for a double arm DDT onto the chair for nine. The Mandible Claw is broken up by a knee to the ribs and the Rock Bottom puts both guys down. Both guys slowly get up and hit each other with chairs, knocking them both out for ten and a draw. Remember that line about there must be a winner? Neither do I.

Rating: B-. Definitely the best match of the night so far but it’s still not all that great. Mankind had definitely earned the right to leave a pay per view as champion so this was a nice treat for him. The ending doesn’t work though as such an emphasis had been put on the match needing a winner.

He had to do it eventually. From Wrestlemania 19, in Austin’s last match. Allegedly this was going to go on last but Austin got sick the night before and the order was changed.

Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Austin pounds away to start but can’t hook an early Stunner. Rock bails to the floor but gets clotheslined down in the aisle. Austin rams him into the steps and chops away before dropping him onto the barricade a few times. Rock is whipped HARD into the steps before they head back inside. A big clothesline puts Rock down but he takes out Austin’s bad knee to send Steve to the floor.

Rock stomps away on the knee as Austin stumbles around ringside. The leg is wrapped around the post but Austin pops up with more right hands. Rock kicks the leg out again and puts on the Sharpshooter, only to have Austin crawl to the rope. JR goes on a big rant against Lawler about how this is a wrestling match and not about puppies or Hollywood. Rock wraps the leg around the post a few more times before heading outside and putting on Austin’s vest.

Austin comes back with a clothesline and the Thesz Press to pound away on Rock. The middle finger elbow keeps Rock down again and it’s time to stomp a mudhole, but Rock comes back with right hands. Austin counters with a Rock Bottom of his own for a very close two. Rock fights up and hits a Stunner of his own out of nowhere for two more. Back up again and Rock pounds away, only to walk into the real Stunner for another close two.

Austin goes to pick Rock up but the guy with Austin’s vest on hits him low to break it up. The People’s Elbow misses but the Stunner is countered into a spinebuster, followed by the removal of the vest and the Elbow for two. A Rock Bottom gets two on Austin, another Rock Bottom gets two but a BIG Rock Bottom is finally enough to end Austin.

Rating: B+. It’s definitely a step or three below the one from two years ago but it’s definitely still entertaining. My problem with it as usual though is that it doesn’t have anything on it. When you have two huge matches between the two before when they were on top and now you get them both well past their primes for nothing but pride, it’s a bit harder to get into it. Still very good, but not as great as their others.

One more title win, from No Way Out 2001.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. Kurt Angle

It’s pretty much one sided as to who is going to win here and even Ross and Tazz acknowledge it. Long staredown to start and we’re on. The straps are down before we even start as we hear about him using some hold called an ankle lock. Rock hits a jumping Russian leg sweep for two. Ankle lock goes on about a minute in but Rock makes the ropes. These two always have had good chemistry together so this should be solid stuff.

A pair of belly to bellies but Rock almost gets dropped on his head the first time. He clearly tucks his head more on the second one so at least he can learn on the fly. Sharpshooter goes on and Angle is in trouble. This is very fast paced so far. A belly to back suplex from Kurt but he didn’t spin slightly so it’s not the Angle Slam. Second rope suplex gets two for Rock.

I’m not sure if I like Rock’s DDT or not. He does it oddly for some reason. And here’s Big Show for no apparent reason. Chokeslams for everyone including the referee. Show’s music plays him out as I expect us to cut to a commercial or something. Angle covers Rock but there’s no referee. He pops Angle with the title as there’s another referee. What a heelish thing to do but Angle gets up anyway.

Ankle lock out of nowhere and Angle drops some nice cursing in there. Rock gets the counter and initiates his ending sequence. The elbow gets two to a huge reaction as everyone thought it was over. Rock Bottom is blocked and there’s the Olympic Slam for two and a freaking ROAR. Rock starts his punches but Angle kicks him in the ankle in a nice counter.

Angle gets rammed into the buckle chest first and walks into the Rock Bottom for….two? Angle did not move at all and the announcers sound very confused. The referee seemingly just stopped counting instead of doing the three. Either that was a botch or there’s something I’m missing here. The fans boo the heck out of it as Rock picks him up and hits another Rock Bottom for the clean pin. That had to be a botch on the first one.

Rating: B. Solid match here, but the Big Show thing was just totally pointless. The ending was just weird though as that had to be a botch though as it just made no sense at all. These two always worked well together and this was no exception. Solid match and definitely worthy of a main event on a PPV.

Eh one more Wrestlemania main event for the road. From 2000.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Mick Foley vs. HHH vs. Big Show

There are no tags here, no disqualification and you have to win by pin. Why there are no submissions is beyond me but whatever. Rock and Big Show fight as do the other two with the champion being punched down. Allegedly Foley was told a week before this match that he would be participating so he isn’t in the best of shape. Granted that’s normal for him so maybe it won’t be that big of a deal.

Big Show runs over everyone and gorilla presses HHH and Rock. Foley gets a headbutt but tries to jump on Show’s back, only to have the giant crush him against the mat. Rock comes back with right hands on Big Show but walks into a side slam for no cover. HHH jumps into a chokeslam attempt but Foley breaks it up with a low blow. Everyone triple teams Big Show to a big reaction and a running clothesline from Rock puts him down. They all stomp away at the giant but HHH and Foley just can’t work together that long.

Foley blasts HHH in the ribs with a chair and hits Show in the back with it as well, allowing the Rock Bottom to get rid of the biggest guy in the match. We’re down to three now and Shane is ticked off. HHH offers Foley an alliance against Rock but Foley says no. Instead HHH offers Rock an alliance against Foley but we get a Rock and Sock Connection reunion as HHH gets beaten down. HHH gets punched down and dropped with a double clothesline.

The champion is sent to the floor but the Connection won’t fight each other. Instead they head to the outside and beat up HHH even more to the fans’ delight. Rock picks up the bell but accidentally blasts Foley in the head. Foley gets up quickly and finds a barbed wire 2×4. HHH saves himself with a low blow and a shot to Foley’s ribs with the board. Rock comes back in and is backdropped to the floor, allowing Foley to hit the double arm DDT on HHH. It’s Socko time and Rock adds a belt shot to take HHH down.

Rock loads up the Elbow but Foley puts the Claw on him to break it up. HHH hits them both low to put them both down but Rock gets back up first and pounds away on the champion. Foley gets in a shot to Rock for two and a double arm DDT gets the same. Vince slides in a chair for no apparent reason but Foley gets it first. It gets kicked back into his face by Rock for two as HHH makes the save. Why would he do something like that? A running knee lift gets two on Rock but HHH doesn’t save this time. Interesting.

HHH and Mick start working together for a bit and a knee drop gets two on Rock. They head to the floor with Mick’s knees being sent HARD into the steps. Mick picks up said steps and cracks Rock in the head with them as Stephanie yells at Linda. HHH puts Rock on the table for the Foley elbow through it….but Mick can’t jump that far and crashes ribs first into the edge of the table. HHH hits about three elbows of his own to put Rock through the table as the match continues to drag.

Back inside and HHH Pedigrees Foley for two and a big eruption from the crowd. A BIG chair shot to the head puts Foley down and Linda is panicking. HHH Pedigrees Mick onto the chair and the career is over again. We’re down to two now and HHH is somehow even more hated than he was before. Foley gets a big standing ovation but turns around to come back to the ring. He picks up the barbed wire and blasts HHH in the head to give us one last BANG BANG moment.

We’re finally down to HHH vs. Rock after twenty minutes of glorified preliminary stuff. Rock gets two off the barbed wire stuff and they head up to the stage for the required main event brawling. Rock suplexes HHH down on the concrete and does the same with a clothesline. They head into the crowd for even more “fighting” which means walking with the occasional punching. A backdrop puts HHH back at ringside where Rock picks up the steps, only to have HHH knock them onto Rock with a chair. He pounds on the steps with the chair to crush Rock even further underneath them.

A piledriver on the steps keeps Rock down even longer before we head inside again. The piledriver only gets two and Rock is somehow up again to slug away with right hands. Rock Bottom and Pedigree are both countered with HHH being backdropped out to the floor. Rock hits a kind of spinebuster to put HHH down and there’s a suplex through the table for good measure. Both guys are basically dead now but it’s Rock up first.

Vince can’t handle the lack of the spotlight anymore though and rams HHH into the post. Cue Shane again to take out Vince with a monitor shot to the head but Papa gets up a few seconds later to beat up his son. Shane comes back with a chairshot as we’re ignoring THE MAIN EVENT OF WRESTLEMANIA to see Shane and Vince fight. As a bleeding Vince is taken out, we cut to a shot of Stephanie with the most vapid look you’ll ever see on her face.

We’re allowed to return to the match now with right hands from Rocky. A DDT gets two on the champion as does a tilt-a-whirl slam. HHH comes back with a facebuster and a barbed wire shot to the head of Rock. At least he’s nice enough to loudly ask “ARE YOU OK” before being catapulted into Shane. There’s the Rock Bottom but Rock can’t cover. Instead here’s Vince for the 87th time tonight to slap Shane around. Then, as if you would expect anything else, he turns on Rock with a chair shot. Stephanie still fails at acting as HHH chairs Rock down again for the pin to retain and kill the crowd even deader.

Rating: D+. And that’s being VERY generous. This was the definition of McMahon overkill as it was ALL about them with the match literally being ignored at times while they had their repeated drama. On top of that the match sucked with the first 20 minutes being there to get us to the last 20 minutes which doesn’t do anyone any good. The rest of the match was just a big mess with no real story to it as we were all at the mercy of the McMahons. Instead of focusing on HHH vs. Rock, we had to wait 40 minutes for Vince to turn on Rock for no apparent reason. Also Rock would win the title at Backlash, making this entirely pointless.

From No Mercy 2001, with Rock giving Jericho the rub of a lifetime.

WCW World Title: The Rock vs. Chris Jericho

Feeling out process to start and Rock grabs a headlock. Jericho grabs an armbar but shifts over to chopping instead. Rock Bottom and Walls are both countered so Jericho dropkicks him to the floor. Back in Jericho hits a top rope back elbow for two. They’re starting kind of slow which says to me that they have a ton of time to work with. They chop away in the corner but Rock walks into a spinwheel kick to take him down for two.

Senton backsplash puts Rock down even more. Rock fires off a jumping clothesline but walks into a Stun Gun. Belly to belly by Rock puts both of them down. It’s been mostly Jericho so far but Rock is hitting enough stuff to stay in there. There’s another suplex and a Samoan Drop for two. Jericho knocks him down so Rock nips up. Rock knocks him to the floor for a bit. Back in a vertical suplex gets two for Rocky.

Rock throws him to the floor and once we’re back in, Rock throws on a chinlock for awhile. Jericho gets catapulted into the corner so Rock can load up a superplex. Chris knocks him off and a missile dropkick puts both guys down. Jericho wins a slugout and a rana gets two. Rock comes back but Jericho catches him in a Rock Bottom. Lionsault gets two as this has gotten awesome.

Jericho loads up a People’s Elbow but Rock moves. Because, you know, it’s an elbow. Rock hooks a Sharpshooter and the Canadian is in trouble. Jericho finally gets to the rope and the fans aren’t sure what to do. Out to the floor and it’s Spanish Announce Table time. Rock Bottom puts Jericho through the table and the place pops big. Back in the ring and Rock stalks Chris.

Another Rock Bottom is countered but Rock manages a spinebuster and loads up a People’s Elbow of his own. Jericho picks the ankle into the Walls and Rock is in trouble. Rock reaches for the rope but Jericho pulls him back to the middle. And here’s Stephanie because what’s a great title match without a McMahon? She throws in a chair and Rock DDTs Jericho. She cheers for Rock so Rock brings her in for a Rock Bottom. Jericho catches Rock in a Breakdown (Skull Crushing Finale) onto the chair for the pin, the title and a BIG pop from the crowd.

Rating: A-. I’m bringing this down a bit because of Stephanie. I mean there just was no need for her to be in there. It was minor but what in the world does she need to be there for? Jericho winning is still huge, but it should have been without her out there. The chair is fine, but why did we need her? The match was GREAT otherwise though with them mirroring each other perfectly.

Now for my favorite Rock match and one of my favorites ever. From Summerslam 1998 to blow off DX vs. the Nation once and for all.

Intercontinental Title: The Rock vs. HHH

Rock has held the title since December and there hasn’t been a longer reign since. The DX band plays HHH to the ring. Chyna and Mark Henry are the seconds here. The referee takes a long time to get the belt ready which is why it’s usually above the ring when the match begins. Rock talks some trash and the fight is on. A quick clothesline takes the champion down and a facebuster does the same. HHH escapes the Rock Bottom but gets punched down in the corner.

A quick Pedigree attempt is countered with a backdrop to the floor and Rock goes for the ladder. As is the custom, there’s a fight over who gets to bring the ladder into the ring. HHH takes the fight back to the ring before going after a ladder. This time it’s Rock’s turn to stop the attempt and they fight in the aisle again. Rock gets a ladder up against the ring and whips HHH HARD into the steel.

The champion starts his climb but HHH flies in off the top to break it up, but the ladder falls on him to keep both guys down. A hard ladder shot puts Rock down again and HHH drives the top of the ladder into his ribs. Rock pulls HHH off the ladder and the future Game lands on his knee, legitimately injuring it and requiring several months off to heal up. Some elbows to the knee make the pain even worse but the ladder being dropped on it is far more painful.

Rock puts the leg between the ladder legs and crushes it with the chair for good measure. Now the leg is wrapped around the post and the fans are split. Rock bridges the ladder between the steps and the barricade so he can drop the knee across the steel. The ladder is barely in one piece so Rock’s climbing is very slow, allowing HHH to make a last second save. He also shoves the ladder down until his knee can recover a bit.

Rock is shoved to the floor but he catches HHH in a catapult face first into the ladder. The champion tries to slam the ladder onto HHH but a kick to the ribs makes him drop the ladder. A clothesline puts Rock down but he counters a Pedigree into a backdrop onto the ladder. Mark Henry throws in another ladder but Rock does the slowest climb in recorded history, allowing HHH to shove it down again. HHH baseball slides the top of the ladder into Rock’s face to send him to the floor, busting him open bad.

Now it’s time for HHH to climb up but Rock makes another save to send HHH crashing to the mat. Rock puts a ladder on top of the corner and plants HHH with a DDT. Both guys slowly climb for a slugout on top but it’s HHH being shoved off into the ladder in the corner. With one last rush he shoves Rock’s ladder over to get us back to even again. Chyna slides HHH a chair and knocks the ladder into Rock before beating the chair into the ladder over and over again.

HHH can’t follow up so Rock slams him down onto the ladder and hits a People’s Elbow to get the crowd on his side again. HHH somehow gets up again and tries a climb but makes the mistake of diving onto Rock for a Rock Bottom. Rock goes up but HHH pulls him back down for a Pedigree as JR is losing his mind on these big moves. HHH tries to get up but Henry throws powder in his eyes. A blind HHH goes up but can’t see the belt. Rock goes up as well but it’s Chyna with a low blow, allowing HHH to pull down the belt for the win.

Rating: A+. This was a history making match as these two are officially the future and it was time for Rock to ascend to the top of the company. The match is one of my all time favorites and it’s an overlooked masterpiece because of the series these two had in 2000. These two went to war and had Madison Square Garden, the smark capital of the world, eating out of the palm of their hand. That’s only happened a handful of times ever and this was one of the best ever.

As for the match itself it worked for a variety of reasons. More than anything else though it was due to the ladder being a prop for the guys rather than the focus of the match. The story built around the leg injury and the drama instead of the big spots. It’s very rare that you get a ladder match like this anymore and the match is absolute required viewing as a result.

Is there anything else I could end this with? From the greatest show of all time.

As JR says, the time is upon us.

We recap Austin vs. Rock II which is summed up by one line from Austin: “The fact is Rock, you got the WWF Title and I want it.” This is backed up by the mother of all hype videos, set to My Way by Limp Bizkit. I’m not a fan of their music but this video is AMAZING. Debra was originally involved but thankfully that was dropped after about eight seconds. This was the best kind of build there was: take two superstars who seemingly cannot lose and put them together in a title match. These two beat on each other for months on end until this night arrived.

WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Heyman says this is the match that both men need to win and neither man can afford to lose. Right before the entrances, Fink tells us that this is now No DQ, which is a surprise to everyone. Austin’s pop is awe inspiring as the face absolutely lose their minds at his entrance. Rock gets a VERY mixed reaction as Austin is a folk hero here in Texas. The brawl is on immediately and Austin hits the Thesz Press and middle finger elbow, only to be taken down by a swinging neckbreaker. The Rock Bottom and Stunner are countered and Austin throws Rock to the floor. We’re maybe 45 seconds in at this point.

They fight into the crowd with Rock taking over with more right hands. Back to ringside with Austin hitting a clothesline to put Rock down before adjusting his knee brace for a bit. They’re back in the ring now with Austin hitting a running crotch attack in 619 position followed by a superplex for the first two count of the match. Austin takes off the turnbuckle pad and pounds away to A LOT of booing from the crowd. A back elbow gets two for Rock before he clotheslines Austin to the floor.

They fight over to the announce table with Austin coming back with a bell shot to the face. Rock is knocked onto the announce table which breaks a few seconds later. We head back inside for Austin to pound away to even more pops from the crowd. Rock comes back with right hands but Austin drops both him and a leg for two. Rock is busted open and Austin chokes away in the corner. Austin stops to yell at the referee and gets his head taken off by a lariat from Rock.

The champion pounds away with right hands before getting the bell. It goes upside the head of the also bloody Austin but only gets two. We’re at the point now where the pinfall attempts get more and more intense. Rock keeps pounding away but Austin won’t stay down. Back to the floor with Austin firing off more fists as JR is in all his glory calling it. A slingshot sends Rock head first into the post and man did he BOUNCE off that thing. Back inside and Rock scoops the legs for the Sharpshooter in a call back to WM 13 where Austin is dripping blood while in the hold. He makes the rope this time though and we keep going.

Rock flips Austin off, earning himself a Sharpshooter from Austin. Well there’s a twist. It’s a terrible Sharpshooter but it gets the job done. Rock powers out though with blood dripping in between his teeth, again ala Mania 13. Back to the Sharpshooter on Rock but he makes the rope this time to escape again. Austin busts out the Million Dollar Dream of all things and the bloody Rock is in trouble. Rock fights up though and we get another callback to a Bret vs. Austin masterpiece with Rock climbing the rope and backflipping onto Austin for two, making him break the hold in the process.

Out of nowhere Rock hits a Stunner on Austin but he can’t follow up. It eventually gets two…and here’s Vince. Austin’s whip spienbuster gets two but he walks into one by Rock which sets up the People’s Elbow. Vince breaks it up though by pulling Rock off Austin, earning himself a death stare from the champion. Now we know something is afoot given the history between Vince and Austin. Rock chases Vince but runs into a Rock Bottom from Austin for another very close two.

The Stunner is countered and Hebner is knocked to the floor, allowing Austin to hit a low blow. Vince brings in a chair and clocks Rock with it on Austin’s instructions, getting another delayed two count. Now the fans are cheering for Rock a lot more but aren’t as pleased when Rock hits a Rock Bottom out of nowhere. Vince gets pulled into the ring for a beatdown but it’s a Stunner to Rock for only two. That probably should have been the finish, but instead Austin gets the chair and gives Rock the mother of all beatdowns with it, hitting him SIXTEEN TIMES. Rock is DEAD and Austin covers the body for the pin and the title.

Rating: A+. Yes there’s kind of weak ending, yes there were some lame points, but it’s Rock vs. Austin II for the world title in the main event of Wrestlemania. This is a masterpiece by definition alone. I think I might be the only person on the planet that likes this turn still, but it was in front of the wrong crowd. If this was ANY other state in the country it would have been booed like there was no tomorrow, but instead gets cheered, which is where the problem came from. Still though, excellent match and worthy of being the main event of the greatest show ever.

The Rock isn’t a guy you put on a list of the greatest of all time. He’s a guy where you figure out who is ahead of him on that list. He’s one of if not the funniest and best talkers ever but people forget how great he was in the ring. Those showdowns he had with Austin are as good of a series as you’ll ever see, with Wrestlemania X7 possibly being the best Wrestlemania main event of all time. Rock is amazing, and the fact that he was as good as he was when he came back eight years later is astounding.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Survivor Series at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:




New E-Book: KB’s History of Survivor Series

This time we’re starting back in 1987 when there was only one WWF pay per view a year.  With Wrestlemania III being a huge success, it was decided that another pay per view should be added to help bridge the gap between Wrestlemanias.  The fact that it was able to cause major damage to the NWA was just a bonus.

There has been a long list of great Survivor Series matches over the years, including the tag team Survivor Series matches, Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels in 1992 and Steve Austin vs. Bret Hart. There’s also a big list of people making their debut with the company at the show. Names like the Undertaker, Kurt Angle and The Rock all stepped into the ring for the first time at Survivor Series. On top of all that Survivor Series had the most infamous moment in wrestling history that changed a lot of things forever.

 

In this new book, I’ll be looking at the history of the Survivor Series, breaking down each show and going over every match, promo and segment, providing historical context, analysis and rating each match and show.

The book is available from Amazon for just $3.99 (or the equivalent in any other currency) and runs 391 pages on a Kindle. If you don’t have a Kindle, there are free apps that you can get to read it on your phone, laptop, iPad, or any other electronic device you have. These can be found from Amazon here.

You can pick it up from Amazon here.

From the UK Amazon here.

From the Canadian Amazon here.

Or if you’re in another country with its own Amazon page, just search KB Survivor Series and it should be the first thing that pops up.

Also you can still get any of my previous books on the WWE Championship, Monday Night Raw from 1998 and 2001, Monday Nitro from 1995-96, In Your House, Summerslam, Starrcade and Clash of the Champions at my author’s page here.

I hope you enjoy it and thanks for checking it out.

KB




Wrestler of the Day – April 27: Goldberg

Today is Goldberg. Make your own chants.

 

Goldberg famously made his debut on Nitro, September 22, 1997.

Bill Goldberg vs. Hugh Morrus

Tenay has no idea who Goldberg is, shocking the other announcers. Larry: “YOU DON’T KNOW?” They trade hammerlocks to start and seem to miss each other a bit. Goldberg takes him down into a knee bar and pounds away in the corner. Morrus comes out of the corner with a middle rope clothesline and No Laughing Matter hits….for two? Goldberg pops up from a shoulder block and hits a powerslam and a regular slam to follow it up. The yet to be named Jackhammer ends this quick. As Goldberg says after the match: “That’s #1”.

Goldberg’s first real feud was with Steve McMichael, who he faced at Starrcade 1997.

Bill Goldberg vs. Steve McMichael

Steve “Mongo” McMichael is a former Horseman and NFL player, but he’s absolutely terrible in the ring. Goldberg is still undefeated at this point and would become a much bigger deal after this show is over. This is happening because Goldberg stole McMichael’s Super Bowl ring and they’ve attacked each other a few times since. The brawl is on in the aisle to start but Mongo’s offense isn’t having much effect. Goldberg literally picks him up and carries Mongo into the ring like a rag doll.

Goldberg picks up a table at ringside as the bell rings and the actual match begins. Mongo suplexes him down for two but a big shoulder tackle takes Steve down for two. We head to the floor where the table is leaning against the post. They fight around the ring with Mongo taking over before heading back inside, only to have Goldberg punch Mongo as Steve dives off the top. Goldberg hooks a quick leg lock and is toying with Mongo at this point.

The spear (the setup for Goldberg’s finisher) hits for two and Goldberg loads up the table on the floor. He tries to slam Mongo over the top and through the table but the referee breaks it up. A dropkick of all things puts Mongo down and out to the floor and we have to be getting close to done. Mongo gets back up onto the apron, only to be punched through the table. Back in and the Jackhammer (suplex but instead Goldberg turns it over into a powerslam) ends Mongo.

Rating: D. This was terrible but Goldberg’s day was coming. It was clear that Mongo just wasn’t any good as a wrestler and thankfully in 1998 he would be pushed WAY down the card and rarely ever have a big match again. The match itself was slow and plodding, but Goldberg would be pushed to the moon very quickly after this.

Here’s one of the more infamous matches from the earlier days of the streak. From February 8, 1998 on Nitro.

Steven Regal vs. Goldberg

Here’s a somewhat famous match. Regal takes him to the mat with a cravate and kicks Goldberg in the back a few times before grabbing the arm. Goldberg takes him down by the leg but Regal is quickly in the ropes. They trade arm wringers again before Regal kicks him in the face. Regal powers out of a headscissors and fires off knees to the head before Goldberg shoves him into the corner. Goldberg cranks him down by the arm and hits a belly to back suplex for no cover.

Goldberg looks for the spear but Regal headbutts him in the ribs instead and takes out the leg instead. Regal fires off knees and punches to the face but Goldberg comes back with a botched swinging neckbreaker. A shoulder block only kind of hits Regal and he blocks some strikes in the corner to make Goldberg look even more out of it. Goldberg finally hits the spear (more like a double leg takedown here) and a Jackhammer with no delay or snap to it at all finally ends Regal.

Rating: C. This was definitely more interesting than a usual Goldberg match but for all the wrong reasons. Allegedly (Regal has denied this) Regal was shooting on Goldberg here and most of the match wasn’t planned. It resulted in Regal being fired almost immediately and eventually becoming A REAL MAN’S MAN in the WWF. Goldberg looked confused in the match and Regal easily blocking a lot of his stuff made Goldberg look less effective than he ever had before.

The streak took off soon after this and hit one of its high points on April 20, 1998’s Nitro.

US Title: Goldberg vs. Raven

Raven is defending and this is under his rules. He lays the belt out in front of Goldberg and they talk trash, only to have Raven dropkick him down. We head to the floor with Raven being whipped into the barricade to give Goldberg control. Back inside and Goldie puts on a leg lock before superkicking Raven right back to the floor.

Raven grabs a chair and smashes Goldberg in the back to slow him down. There’s the drop toehold onto the chair followed by a reverse chinlock on Goldberg. The big man powers up and no sells a bunch of right hands. There’s the spear but Goldberg has to destroy the Flock. Raven tries to leave but the fans throw him back to ringside. Another spear and a Jackhammer onto a stop sign (brought in by Horace) make Goldberg US Champion.

Rating: C+. Total destruction here by Goldberg which is a good idea, but I don’t know why it had to be at Raven’s expense just one day after he won the title. The guy did some great work with Page and Benoit earlier in the year but now he gets to keep the US Title for a single day? Still though, good, hard hitting match here.

Then July 6, 1998 happened. Goldberg vs. Hogan was announced for the World Title, but Hogan said Goldberg had to win another match earlier in the night to get the shot.

US Title: Goldberg vs. Scott Hall

The bald one has to win to get the REAL bald one for the title. I’m not sure if the chants are piped in here or not. Ok apparently this is a US Title match. They really need to work on making it clear what matches are for titles. Hall hits those shoulders that he’s kind of known for. Naturally they don’t work as it’s all Goldberg. To say this match is sloppy is an understatement.

It never ceases to amaze me how they managed to screw up Goldberg. Hall is clearly not someone that needs to be in the ring at this point as he was really messed up with substance abuse etc. It’s also his first televised match in two months which likely isn’t helping him. Then again I find him incredibly overrated. Goldberg beats him up and Hall calls down NWO guys.

Cue Disciple and Vincent but DDP and Malone pop them with chairs and it’s back to one on one. Hall calls for the Razor’s Edge and is LAUNCHED onto his back. Spear sets up the Jackhammer and the roof is partially gone since it’s on for later tonight. Again, HOW DID THEY MESS HIM UP?

Rating: D+. Bad match but that’s not the point here. This was about setting up Goldberg as the unstoppable force for later tonight which was kind of overkill but it fit Hogan pretty well I guess. This was relative dominance and it worked rather well. Hall just wasn’t worth anything at this point though and it didn’t look pretty.

WCW World Title: Goldberg vs. Hulk Hogan

Immediately you can see why the match with Hall was a bad idea as the pop is solid but nowhere near what it should be. The fans have already seen him once tonight so the excitement is limited. Hogan gets booed out of the building. Naturally we’re 6-7 months removed from Starrcade and Hogan has the belt again. He’s held it since late April so for about two and a half months. Sting’s reign was like two months or so. After the match tonight, Hogan would have it AGAIN in less than 6 months, which we’ll get to later.

The bell gets a pop. This is one of the hottest crowds I can ever remember as the people are salivating over everything. In a funny line, Tenay says WCW is the third biggest wrestling company on the planet. This stuns me, until he says “after the two NWO factions.” So in other words, 6 months after Starrcade, not only does Hogan have the belt again but there are TWO NWOs instead of the original one being gone. And you wonder why they went out of business.

Just basic power stuff here to start as they’re feeling each other out a lot to start. Hogan takes over with some punches and whips Goldberg with his weight belt. Goldberg gets a full nelson but takes a low blow. There’s a great energy here which is making this awesome. Hogan takes a clothesline and the place POPS. The match itself is pretty bad but much like Hogan/Andre, that’s not the point.

We hit the floor and Hogan gets a chair shot in but there’s no DQ called. There’s the chant and the legdrop is treated like any other move. Hogan hits two of them and here’s Curt Hennig. THREE legdrops gets a two count as Malone pops up to hit a Diamond Cutter on Hennig. Goldberg more or less no sells the leg drops and spears the heck out of Hogan. Heenan is LOSING it here. Jackhammer hits and the place goes NUTS. Goldberg is the world champion, and the image of him standing on the stage holding up both his titles is very cool.

Rating: A+. Like I said in the Hogan vs. Andre at Mania 3 review, this wasn’t about the match in the ring and if you think it was you’re an idiot and don’t get wrestling. Goldberg looked awesome here and Hogan put him over 100% clean. That was the key thing here: Goldberg didn’t have to have some screwy way to win the title. He hit his two big moves and pinned Hogan after kicking out of the legdrop.

This is how you put someone over and amazingly enough, Hogan never got this one back, even though this was the plan. Hogan had made a deal that he got to beat Goldberg when the time was right, which is more nonsense but at least they would get this one night. The payback would evolve into the Fingerpoke of Doom, which we’ll get too soon enough.

Here’s Goldberg’s best title defense.

WCW World Title: Goldberg vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Let’s stop it here for a second because this is where it all fell apart. See, WCW decided that this show should be extra long and asked the PPV companies to give them an extra thirty minutes. Unfortunately this was 1998 and not that simple, so a lot of feeds went off somewhere between the end of the Warrior vs. Hogan match and the start of the title match. Yeah WCW gave them some advance notice, but that doesn’t put WCW in the clear. If you look at this show, they EASILY could have cut nearly an hour out but WCW just couldn’t let that happen.

Overall the show ran roughly three hours and twenty minutes, so cutting out say 25 minutes would have made this fit the time slot. As I mentioned, we had over 22 minutes of segments that weren’t needed or Nitro Girls (certainly not worthless but not necessary). On top of that there was the Juvy vs. Disco match, Wrath vs. Meng, Finlay vs. Wright, Saturn vs. Lodi and the Tag Title match which all could have been on free TV instead of here. WCW never advertised the show as running longer than usual as far as I know so it’s not like the fans would feel ripped off.

It comes off as a combination of stupidity and somewhat arrogance as the company just figured their plan would work and they just HAD to be bigger than WWF. What did most of the stuff they added here help? What does a Saturn vs. Lodi comedy match (probably six minutes with entrances and a post match replay) do to help the card? It ticked off the fans and cost them a lot of money, but at least they got the Buff Bagwell swerve and a Konnan music video on PPV.

And now, the match. Page’s music is edited on the Network. Page charges right at him a few times and is easily shoved away. An armdrag frustrates Goldberg and they lock up before falling to the floor without breaking it up. Back in and Page tries a legsweep but Goldberg does a standing backflip to avoid it. Men his size should not be able to do that. A bad looking cross armbreaker has Page in trouble and Goldberg shoves him out of the ring to block the Diamond Cutter.

Back in and Page takes him down into a hammerlock but a hard shoulder block puts him on the floor. Page is able to snap Goldberg’s throat across the top rope and he follows up with a swinging neckbreaker. A Russian legsweep gets two and we hit a front facelock. Goldberg knees his way out of it and hits a spinning neckbreaker to put Page down. A hard hiptoss puts Page down and a side slam gets two for the champion. Back to the cross armbreaker but Page makes the rope.

A superkick sends Page flying but he sidesteps the spear, sending Goldberg hard into the post. Page gets two off a flying clothesline and the running DDT puts the champion down as well. He calls for the Diamond Cutter but Goldberg nails him with the spear. It injures his arm though and Goldberg can’t get the Jackhammer. Page slips behind him and grabs the Diamond Cutter but both guys are down. The fans are suddenly WAY into this as Page gets a very close two. Page tries a suplex of his own but Goldberg counters into the Jackhammer to retain the title.

Rating: B. It’s not a masterpiece but it’s definitely Goldberg’s best match ever. The fans were buying into Page as a threat at the end of the match and that’s more than can be said about the vast majority of Goldberg’s opponents. To put it simply, this was a good wrestling match. You can’t often say that about a WCW main event but that’s what you had here.

Goldberg would lose the title to Kevin Nash at Starrcade 1998. Here’s their rematch from Spring Stampede 1999.

Kevin Nash vs. Goldberg

Apparently this is the rematch from Starrcade or something. Liz and Luger are here with Nash. Nash says something on the mic but the mic doesn’t seem to work because I didn’t hear a thing. He drives Goldberg to the corner and pounds away knees in the corner. The fans are looking at something to the right of the ring and Nash continues to go as slowly as he can while still being considered alive.

The fans almost immediately chant for Sting as Nash gets a two count. He hits the side slam for another two as this has been completely one sided. The running hip attack to the back of Goldberg while he’s in the 619 position keeps the bald one down. Goldberg snaps off a shoulder block though and something like a hooking superkick to load up the spear. NASH JUMPS OVER GOLDBERG!!! The spear hits the referee so Luger pops Goldberg with the chair. Goldberg blocks the powerbomb with a handful of balls. Spear and Jackhammer end this.

Rating: D+. What in the world was the point of this? Goldberg hit like 5 moves and dominated so he’s back to the point where he used to be, minus the title that is. Still though, was there a point to having this be like seven minutes long? It wasn’t horrible, but I’m sitting here asking if that’s it. Also, was there a point to Luger and Liz being out there? I don’t see it if there was.

Speaking of rematches, here’s Page vs. Goldberg II from Fall Brawl 1999.

Goldberg vs. Diamond Dallas Page

This is more or less a midcard match because Goldberg had his time so it’s time for the REAL draws in the form of old Sting and old Hogan to run things here. So just to be clear here, Goldberg is 32 years old and has one loss against roughly 240 wins in his WCW career. He’s ridiculously popular and here he is in a midcard feud. Seriously, I want to know: how did WCW make money at one point?

The referee checks them for objects and finds a chain on Page. Page shoves the referee away and drops a roll of half dollars. Ok that was funny. Page is knocked to the floor quickly and comes back in for a feeling out process, only to get knocked all over the place for his efforts. Page is knocked to the floor again as it doesn’t seem like they know what their plan is here, which is unheard of for a Page match.

Page gets a shot in as Goldberg comes in again but can’t get the Diamond Cutter. Powerslam gets no cover for Goldberg. Page pulls out a third object which the referee didn’t find to hammer Billy Boy in the head and take over. The fans LOUDLY chant for Goldberg and pop even louder when he gets in some punches. Page drills him with the object again and the referee is cool with it I guess.

Off to the chinlock on the mat as Page cheats even more which this referee somehow still can’t see. I know the joke is that they’re blind but how can you manage to believe this isn’t being seen? Goldberg Goldbergs Up and even hits a big boot to complete the joke. Page gets a horrible jumping tornado DDT to get two and break the momentum though which is kind of surprising actually.

Another weapon shot sets up a spinning Rock Bottom for two. Here’s the rest of the Triad to cheat and that doesn’t work. Spear and Jackhammer end this like three seconds later. Oh and the last weapon shot made Goldberg legit bleed from the neck. Freaking ow man. Well at least it’s over I guess.

Rating: D. Remember when Page was one of the most awesome things in the world and more or less couldn’t be beaten? This is nothing like that. Page as a heel is awful, especially when he’s getting destroyed by someone like Goldberg. This was a weak match all around and no one bought that Page had a chance at all, which he didn’t.

Goldberg would hurt his arm in December of 1999 and be out for several months. He would come back in the summer as a heel and go after the title on Nitro, July 24, 2000.

WCW World Title: Booker T vs. ???

It’s Sting. Apparently the mask is a bunch of bandages from Vampiro burning him. That makes more sense and it only took an hour to tell us that. Sting comes out but Goldberg jumps him. Hehe screw the fans. Goldberg superkicks Sting and Sting has to be taken out on a stretcher. Booker gets in anyway…and is immediately decapitated by a clothesline and a powerslam. Booker heads to the floor and gets in a shot or two, only to be sent into the steps to put him back down again. The champ is busted open so Goldberg gives him an FU and hooks a cross armbreaker.

Booker gets the rope and the hold is broken….but Stevie Ray (Booker’s brother and former tag partner) comes out and throws in the towel. Ernest Miller comes out and declares Goldberg the winner……but he’s not the champion because Booker didn’t quit. He made the rope and didn’t tap, so why is the match over? This didn’t even make it to three minutes, but hey, the world champ looks like a joke now so the point is made.

Booker demanded a rematch later in the show.

WCW World Title: Booker T vs. Goldberg

Booker jumps him in the aisle but Goldberg knocks him right back down. As they head into the ring, Booker hits the ax kick and Goldberg is in trouble. Never mind as he clotheslines Booker down and into a 360. A powerslam puts Booker down and Goldberg pounds on the cut from earlier. Jeff Jarrett comes out for no reason and hits Goldberg with a chair as this is anything goes. SINCE FREAKING WHEN??? That makes Goldie mad so here’s the Cat to kick Goldberg in the face. That gets him nowhere either so Booker kicks him down for a second and the Book End (Rock Bottom) retains the title in less than three minutes.

Goldberg immediately pops up and spears Booker down and hits a Jackhammer to stand tall to end the show.

The heel run wouldn’t last long because he’s Goldberg, so he would be a face again before his showdown with Scott Steiner at Fall Brawl 2000.

Scott Steiner vs. Goldberg

This is just a grudge match and I guess Goldberg is a face here. No DQ here either. Steiner has to wear a mask because Goldberg broke his face or something. We’re told about how even these two are which is odd but makes sense at the same time. Scotty busts out a Diamond Cutter for two. Ok then. Steiner tries to hide and that doesn’t go well at all for him.

They’re doing the clash of the titans build here and for the most part it’s working. And here’s Midajah, which is supposed to be a big deal I guess. Goldberg is bleeding from some chair shots. She’s just standing there for no apparent reason. Oh ok Goldberg accidently put her through a table. Steiner hits a belly to belly where Goldberg lands on his head and nearly breaks his neck. There’s the spear. We have a lead pipe in there too which I’m sure will have something to do with the ending.

And it’s Vince Russo to bash Goldberg with a baseball bat. Sure why not. It only gets two though and Bill goes through a table. Steiner Recliner, which looks awful since Steiner doesn’t know how to hook it right, doesn’t work as Goldberg picks him up. This is the match where they just hammer each other with no real rhyme or reason. That doesn’t mean it’s bad though as that’s what this is supposed to be. Think Awesome vs. Tanaka.

Back to the Recliner which would look a lot better if it wasn’t just Goldberg crawling on his hands and knees (yeah the arms aren’t even pulled back) to the ropes. A chair is brought in and nothing happens with it. Russo comes in AGAIN but Steiner pops Goldberg in the head with a lead pipe and the Recliner gets the win on the unconscious Goldberg. Oh and Russo does the Jericho cover on him to end it. The Bills come in again to help Goldberg. More on Russo in the overall rating.

Rating: B-. This was about being a big old fight and that’s all it was supposed to be. We didn’t need to have real wrestling here and they didn’t try. I could have done without Russo here but at the same time this match oddly worked. This was probably a #1 contenders match of some sort too.

Around this time, Goldberg was told he had to recreate the streak if he ever wanted another title shot. He would build up a good one as he headed into Sin.

Sgt. Dwayne Bruce/Goldberg vs. Totally Buff

Sarge has a broken arm and the entrances take about five minutes. Goldberg vs. Luger get us going here. You know, Russo made the deal about Goldberg having to win 176 in a row. Why doesn’t Flair just overturn that? Goldberg throws Luger around and throws him to Bagwell who says “Who me?” “Yeah you!’ For some reason that was funny for me. Bagwell hammers away and no sells a suplex.

Goldberg beats down Bagwell and brings in the career jobber Sarge. Sarge beats on him for a bit with a middle rope elbow. I forgot that this is no DQ. Sarge runs into some double teaming, so why doesn’t Goldberg just come in and destroy them? He can’t get disqualified. Actually he does that and the referee throwing him out. How does that make sense?

Luger hammers on Sarge for awhile and Bagwell adds a double arm DDT. Off to the chinlock now as the fans are still in this. Luger gets one of the worst forearm smashes you’ll ever see for two. Thankfully they remember the plate that is allegedly in there. So it can knock out Bret Hart but it barely puts Dwayne Bruce down for two? Only in wrestling would that make sense.

Double tag brings in Goldberg and Luger. HUGE pop for Goldberg. Seriously how in the world did they manage to mess him up? Now we get to the stupid part here. Remember the kid from earlier with the autograph? He’s like 17 or so and Luger goes after him. Goldberg makes the save and the kid maces him.

Goldberg pulls him over the railing and security dives on the kid…..then just let him go and stand at ringside. Punk was right. Wrestling security sucks. Back in the ring Goldberg fights blind for awhile until Luger pops him with a chair a few times and a double Blockbuster (think a Doomsday Device) ends the career. For the month at least.

Rating: D. Weak tag match that was hurt even worse by the ending. Yes a fan that he signed an autograph before earlier was the big answer. Why Luger or Bagwell didn’t bring the mace in themselves is anyone’s guess but hey why not just let a young looking guy do it instead? Either way at least it’s over and they can quit ruining Goldberg for now. HHH got to do that in 03 which is the next time he would be seen.

Goldberg wouldn’t appear in WCW again and would head to Japan for a bit the next year. His next American appearance was the night after Wrestlemania XIX on Raw where he speared the Rock. This set up a match at Backlash 2003.

The Rock vs. Goldberg

Goldberg’s music is changed. You know, because Goldberg wasn’t over with what he had. We also get the full on Hollywood Rock entrance which is still awesome. Goldberg’s music is MUCH softer and it doesn’t work at all. Lawler keeps talking about how Goldberg was a big fish in a small pond and makes sure to make people remember that WCW was NOTHING. The fans chant Goldberg as we’re in full stall mode.

We’re going very slowly with Goldberg knocking Rock out to the floor. Rock stalls on the floor but guillotines him on the rope and hits a clothesline for a pop. Goldberg hits a Rock Bottom and sets up for the spear but Goldberg crashes into the buckle which Lawler says “may be the greatest thing he’s ever seen.” Now it’s Sharpshooter time which is broken eventually. For some reason the referee looks away and Rock hits Goldie low.

Rock sets for the Rock Bottom but Goldberg hits a weak spear. Time for more laying around as this match is WAY too boring. Rock tries some clotheslines but Goldberg won’t go down. A spear from Rock puts Goldberg down and King is losing it. Rock Bottom gets two. The Great One punches him so Goldberg clotheslines him down. Another spinebuster sets up the Elbow but it only gets two and the fans are mad. Spear hits, Rock swears, spear again, Jackhammer and we’re done thank goodness.

Rating: F. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME? This was GOLDBERG VS. THE ROCK! Goldberg literally did nothing but punches, clotheslines, spears and the Jackhammer. Not close to it, not an expression, literally that’s it. This match was absolutely awful with them spending at least four minutes (out of 13) laying around. It’s one of the worst debuts I can remember in years and it was completely unacceptable.

After that mess, Goldberg needed a different style to work with. From Bad Blood 2003.

Goldberg vs. Chris Jericho

Goldberg is wearing white and black. Words cannot describe how stupid it looks. Jericho had wanted this match in WCW but they decided that it wasn’t a good idea so he just bailed when he could, citing this as one of the major factors. Jericho of course runs like a scared man which I can’t blame him for.

Eventually though, Jericho dodges a spear and Goldberg goes through the security wall. What a coincidence there were no seats in front of it either. Goldberg is bleeding a bit and has a bad shoulder now, so if nothing else they’re trying to give us a reason to think Jericho can win so points for that.

That goes on for a GOOD while which makes sense. Jericho runs the match for the most part which is definitely the best idea here. They botch a moonsault but Goldberg does the smart thing and keeps moving so that it doesn’t look like they botched anything and hits what we would call an FU. There’s a loud Goldberg Sucks chant and the referee goes down.

Dang the fans are behind Jericho here. At least they recognize good wrestling. He gets the Walls of Jericho but leg power gets him out of it. Spear number 2 works a lot better even though it’s a left armed one. After failing to get it once, a jackhammer works the second time for the easy pin.

Rating: C+. Again, this could have been a Raw main event but I can go with this being on PPV. However, another five minutes would have made this WAY better. Jericho was in a rut around this time and he didn’t get out of it until the winter when he turned face to feud with Christian. This was ok but nothing great. Goldberg just didn’t work in the WWE and it showed badly.

It was soon off to the title hunt, with Goldberg getting his shot at Unforgiven 2003.

Raw World Title: Goldberg vs. HHH

Also if HHH loses by countout or disqualification he loses the belt. Ross and Lawler are back for commentary here. Ross of course can’t remember when the stakes were ever higher. I love hyperbole in wrestling. This is nut cutting time apparently. Ok then. Ross says he has to mat wrestle Goldberg to keep the title. I thought he had to win the match to retain. Then again I’m no professional.

Goldberg in the shorts never worked. Also they remixed his music for no apparent reason at all. HHH still had a groin injury here so he’s wearing long shorts which look weird. We even get referee instructions. Lawler says it doesn’t get any bigger than this. Again, yeah it does. It’s a power match to start, which despite his huge muscles, HHH has never been portrayed as one other than the spinebuster. The Pedigree certainly isn’t a power move.

Goldberg of course wins it as we’re told that HHH is 4-0 at Unforgiven. Ross and Lawler are rather chipper for guys that just lost their jobs. This match is of course awkward as their styles just clash completely. WWE just had no idea how to use Goldberg. He was a monster but they had him lose far too much and be hurt far too much. They just didn’t get it and it never really worked. The spear eats knee and HHH takes over.

So despite everything that Goldberg has taken over the years, a knee to the head stops him. Sure why not. There’s a Figure Four. I get that Flair is great, but does he have to get so many freaking tributes to him? In a cool power spot, Goldberg catches the knee of HHH on a kneedrop. He just puts his hands up and blocks the knee of a 270+ pound guy, not even factoring in force, the jump that HHH did to get there, the velocity and momentum and the height he got.

That’s so ridiculously over the top that it’s AWESOME. HHH is busted open after going into the steps. And what would a main event be without a ref bump? HHH gets a sledgehammer shot to the jaw which likely should kill Goldberg but he’s up in like 3 seconds and hits the spear. The Jackhammer gives him the title clean.

Rating: D+. This was just generic. It could have been the main event of any big Raw minus the title change. Also, I know Goldberg was a big star but he just doesn’t fit in here at all. They try to make this a huge thing but it just isn’t. More than anything else they just wanted to get the belt off of HHH who had held it since like January. This just had nothing at all going for it though and just wasn’t interesting at all. Not bad from a technical standpoint, but just not a good match at all.

We’ll wrap it up with his best known match from Wrestlemania XX. This was set up by Brock eliminating Goldberg from the Rumble.

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

The catch here is that both guys are leaving and the fans know it, so they boo them both out of the building. Goldie gets his full entrance from the back. The fans IMMEDIATELY start chanting YOU SOLD OUT at Lesnar who is going to the NFL after this match. They circle each other and Austin says get to it. Now the fans sing the GOODBYE song with the guys still making zero contact over a minute in. The fans chant for the referee as Goldberg looks at Austin. Still no contact. After nearly THREE MINUTES of circling each other they lock up.

Amusingly enough, Goldberg is said to have an advantage because he’s a mixed martial arts aficionado. They lock up and shove each other away as it’s almost four minutes in without even a punch being thrown. We get a second lockup with the same result. The crowd is booing loudly now. Literally five minutes in Lesnar grabs a headlock for the first actual move of the match. They trade shoulder blocks with no one going anywhere. They collide again with both guys going down and we’re somehow six minutes into this match.

Now they stare at each other as the fans are about to riot. The fans cheer for HOGAN of all people and that’s FINALLY enough to get something going. Goldberg presses him over his head and drops him into a kind of spinebuster for two. The spear misses though and Goldberg hits the buckle chest first. The fans think Goldberg sucks as he is sent into the post. Back in and Brock gets two off a suplex and then hooks a modified headlock. The fans chant for Hogan again.

Back to the same headlock after a brief break before they collide again. Brock gets two as Austin is still a complete non factor. He seems to be the rodeo clown out there to keep everything from falling apart. Well, falling completely apart because we’re long past falling apart. JR is polite and calls this match pedestrian. Goldberg comes back with some clotheslines and a swinging neckbreaker of all things as the Hogan chant starts again. There’s the spear for two but Goldie spends too much time arguing with Austin and walks into an F5 for two. Brock tries a spear but misses, so a spear and Jackhammer can finish Brock.

Rating: E. As in embarrassing, which is what this was. Have some pride out there people. I know you’re leaving and the fans don’t care, but man alive have some effort out there. If I was an NFL team and Brock gave that kind of a performance I wouldn’t want anything to do with him. No he doesn’t want to be there but that’s his job until his contract expires. This was embarrassing to watch and they deserve the booing they received. Austin added nothing here but he didn’t really need to.

Goldberg is a guy that didn’t have the most talent but WCW was able to maximize everything he had and make the most of it. The matches weren’t long but they didn’t need to be. It was only once he got into the longer matches that things got a lot worse. The fans still chant his name ten years later, despite him only being in the ring like four years total. That says a lot.

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Thought of the Day: Your Time Is My Time

Concerning Rock, Lesnar, Undertaker, RVD etc.One of the most common criticisms about wrestlers such as these is that they’re part timers and shouldn’t be given top spots.  My reaction to this: why in the world shouldn’t they be?

 

Here’s the thing about guys like this: yeah they’re part timers, but they sell tickets.  WWE is supposed to stick with their people that don’t do as well instead of someone like Brock who is a guaranteed draw because of some loyalty?  That’s great.  They can be loyal the whole time business goes down because they don’t want to offend the feelings of some of their employees.

Look at Punk for example.  Yeah he worked hard for a year as champion and had a very entertaining run.  That’s all well and good, but Rock sells more tickets and merchandise than him with relative ease.  WWE would be foolish to stick with Punk because he had been there all this time instead of going with Rock who can make them a lot more money in a hurry.

This part timers shouldn’t get pushed theory comes off like some of the markiest stuff in the world. It’s a business people, and if the part timers do the most business then that’s what we’re going to get. That’s WWE’s thinking and it’s very logical and successful.




Wrestler of the Day – April 2: Lita

It’s my grandmother’s birthday so here’s a fellow beautiful woman: Lita.

Lita would debut in ECW in 1999 as a valet who got physical at times. She would be in the WWF a year later as Essa Rios’ hot manager. This wouldn’t last long as they would break up and Lita would become a singles wrestler. She would get a title shot at the Women’s Title on Raw on August 21, 2000.

Women’s Title: Lita vs. Stephanie McMahon

Yeah this was that dark time where Stephanie was champion as a side effect of the awesome HHH run. Rock is guest referee as part of his war with Trips as well. Lita easily takes her down and hammers away before popping the champ in the corner with forearms. A hurricanrana gets two but Stephanie’s friend Kurt Angle distracts Rock so HHH can trip Lita up.

The Hardys run out for a save and hammer on HHH as Stephanie fires off some lame foreams and a nice DDT for two. Lita comes right back with another hurricanrana but Angle breaks up the Litasault. The Hardys brawl with Angle/HHH until Rock pulls Angle and the title belt into the ring. Angle gets laid out but HHH jumps Rock from behind. Kurt nails HHH by mistake and it’s a Rock Bottom for the Olympian. Stephanie tries a cheap shot and gets a Rock Bottom of her own, setting up the Litasault for the pin and Lita’s first title.

Rating: D+. THis was almost all about the men fighting on the floor which was far more interesting than the girls.  Stephanie was basically the Honky Tonk Man of the Women’s Title as the whole reign was there so someone could save the title and become a big star.  That’s exactly what Lita did and she never looked back.

The trio was getting big around this time and would be brought in to OVW for a six person tag at Christmas Chaos 2001.

Hardy Boys/Lita vs. Disciples of Sinn/Sinn

Sinn is the female manager of Payne and Damien, the OVW tag champions at the time. Hardys are over as all goodness. The Disciples were a big deal in OVW but never went anywhere. Their stable mate is Leviathan as I mentioned earlier but he’s not here for this one. The main thing people want to see here is Lita more or less kill Sinn.

Matt and Damien start us off. Apparently Damien hears voices. Payne is apparently the new member of the team. They’re tagging in very fast. Sinn comes in to slap Matt and gets caught in there against the fat man himself. Off to Lita but Sinn runs away to bring in Damien. Lita tags in both Hardys and the referee seems cool with it. They destroy the Disciples and it’s off to Jeff now.

Very fast paced stuff so far which is weird for the Disciples as they’re pretty decent sized guys. Payne gets a big clothesline to Jeff to take over. Spinebuster gets two for Payne on Jeff. A pretty bad powerslam by Damien gets two. Oh wait that’s Payne. They look a bit alike and the lighting makes it impossible to tell which is which.

Matt acts kind of stupid as he comes in and Jeff gets double teamed. Granted it’s not as stupid as the referee who lets the Disciples switch without tagging twice in a row. Well I guess that puts them back to even. Chinlock has Jeff in trouble. Cornette talks about how much the cheers mean to Jeff. I guess he hasn’t been watching his TNA lately.

Jeff finally gets the tag to bring in Matt and the beating is on. Everyone comes in again and it’s a double clothesline to put Matt and both Disciples down. Sinn tags herself in and so does Lita. Lita takes down Damien because she’s more awesome than everyone else in there. Sinn takes over for a bit but Lita slams her off the top and gets a spear.

Moonsault hits but everyone comes in and it’s a big brawl. Payne hits a Sky High on Lita and Sinn is the only one left. It’s table time now but Jeff saves. Double DDT by Matt and Lita. Jeff throws out a Swanton on the chick through the table. The pin is academic and the pop is pretty solid.

Rating: B-. It’s probably not that good but I’m kind of feeling sorry for this show as the matches haven’t been that good at all. Still though this wasn’t too bad and the Hardys helped it a lot. The point here was for Sinn to get beaten down and that’s exactly what happened. Fun little six person match which worked fine.

Around this time, Chyna won the Women’s Title at Wrestlemania X7 and dominated the division for months with only Lita left standing in her way. This is the showdown from Judgment Day 2001.

Women’s Title: Chyna vs. Lita

Lita is insanely over here. And here’s Chyna looking like a freaking peacock. That’s JR’s term, not mine. They hug before the match as I guess Lita is ok with Chyna being a witch to her and not seeming to take this seriously at all. This is power vs. speed here and both use their own better attribute to take over for a bit. Lita tries to help Chyna up and gets rolled up for two. Ok so she’s hot but not incredibly smart. Got it.

Chyna overpowers the match with ease to start but Lita gets a DDT for two. She finally wakes up and hammers away on Chyna. Middle rope clothesline gets two. Lita goes for the arm as this is getting sloppy. The fans are still in it though so they have that at least. Swinging neckbreaker by Chyna sets up a powerslam for two.

Lita channels her inner Alberto by hooking up a rolling cross armbreaker and Chyna is in real trouble all of a sudden. Chyna reverses into a headscissors and here’s Eddie for no apparent reason. She tries a powerbomb but Lita reverses into a horrible looking rana for two. And then a powerbomb by Chyna ends this clean. Nothing from Eddie other than standing there and Chyna more or less didn’t break a sweat.

Rating: D. This was supposed to be the big showdown? Chyna destroyed Lita here and made her look like a joke. This was Chyna’s last match in the company as she was taken off TV and the title was held up. She held the title until November anyway so there simply were no title matches for about six months. In short, Chyna destroyed the division and it took Trish and Lita to bring it back to whatever it was. Oh and this match was awful.

It wouldn’t be right if I didn’t get in a Team Extreme match. From September 10, 2001 on Raw.

Hardy Boyz/Lita vs. Hurricane/Lance Storm/Ivory

Hurricane vs. Matt to get us going and there’s a loud Lita chant. The Hardys double team both men and it’s off to Storm vs. Jeff. Hurricane sneaks in and hooks a neckbreaker for two and it’s back to Lance. The Alliance team double teams Jeff and Ivory gets in a slap as well. Dropkick gets two for Storm.

Hurricane puts the cape on for a second for a clothesline then has Ivory take it back off. Matt gets in but Storm hits an enziguri while Matt is on the middle rope. Jeff knocks him to the floor and hits a dive to take out Storm. Back in the ring the girls come in and Lita beats up Ivory before snapping off a rana on Hurricane. Matt hits the Twist on Ivory and the Litasault gets the pin.

Rating: C. Not bad here but it was always good to see Lita. Ivory’s looks are underrated as well. The guys’ feuds didn’t go anywhere anytime soon as the Hardys were thrown back into a feud with the Dudleys because we hadn’t seen that recently enough. The match was nothing special though.

Lita would get a title shot at Wrestlemania X8 but come up short. The next night however she would face her biggest rival in a match.

Trish Stratus vs. Lita

Trish looks great as always. Lita goes right after her to start and the fight is on quickly. A clothesline puts the redhead down but she suplexes Trish down a few seconds later. Lita scores with a headscissors but Trish comes right back with a Chick Kick. Stratusfaction is shoved off and the moonsault gets Lita the pin in barely 90 seconds.

Lita was becoming a big star around this time and landed a guest starring role on the FOX series Dark Angel. Unfortunately she would do a hurricanrana on the show and slip, landing on the back of her head and breaking her neck. That put her out of action for about a year and a half until she came back for a tag match at Unforgiven 2003.

Molly Holly/Gail Kim vs. Trish Stratus/Lita

This feud is more or less about Molly and Gail being jealous of Lita and Trish being insanely popular. Standard stuff to put it mildly. Molly is Women’s Champion here and is actually looking good. Lita was out for almost a year because of a broken neck and now wears khaki shorts. Yep she’s gorgeous. The non-famous girls jump them early and that doesn’t work at all.

This is Lita’s return match. Oh seriously who do you expect to win this? You have two girls that are about as middle of the road as possible and the first two women to main event Raw. Lita and Gail are the actual starters and Lita nips up as we hear about King having a vasectomy. Molly hooks a Dragon Sleeper on Trish which works about as well as you would expect it to. Gail is gorgeous. That’s all there is to it.

Now Gail does a Dragon Sleeper. Trish walks up the turnbuckles and backflips into a reverse DDT. FREAKING SWEET. Molly looks good as a brunette and in blue. Trish manages to beat up both girls on her own since Lita is bleeding from the mouth. Lita gets the mostly warm but partly cloudy with a 30% chance of showers tag. Trish knocks Gail to the floor and Lita hits the moonsault to get the win which was about as predictable as you could expect.

Rating: D+. This was exactly what you would expect here. Lita was indeed a huge deal as she and Trish were just flat out awesome around this point but the injury took her out for over a year. This was nothing more than a welcome home match and it did exactly what it was supposed to do: announce that Lita is still awesome.

The end of 2003 and most of 2004 didn’t see much action for Lita, but she would get into a four way for the Women’s Title at Bad Blood 2004.

Women’s Title: Trish vs. Lita vs. Gail Kim vs. Victoria

All four are too hot for words with Trish somehow possibly being the fourth best looking at the moment. Victoria is champion here. Trish vs. Lita never gets old especially when later this year they main evented Raw. That’s saying a lot and I don’t mean it was the last match and then there was a big angle to end the show.

I mean Trish vs. Lita for the title was the last thing you saw to end the show and it was built up all night. It was a very cool moment and I completely bought into it. Gail gets an AWESOME hold on Victoria. More or less it’s a headscissors combined with a crossface combined with an armbar but cooler than it sounds. Lita and Victoria botch something and we have no Trish for a long time, signaling that she’ll be winning. Yep there she is to roll up Lita for the title out of nowhere.

Rating: D+. They all looked hot. Other than that it was just your run of the mill Divas match but with four girls that could actually work which is the best case scenario.

Soon after this, Lita would sleep with Kane to save Matt Hardy, getting pregnant in the process. Around this same time, Trish Stratus would start insulting Lita for being, shall we say, loose, but Lita couldn’t fight back due to her pregnancy. Thankfully (ish), she would lose her baby a few months later. This freed her up to face Stratus in the main event of Raw on December 6, 2004. I don’t mean it was the last match and then the real ending happened. I mean all night long Trish Stratus defending the Women’s Title against Lita was hyped up and then closed the show.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Lita

Even in a faceguard with what looks like masking tape over her face, Trish is gorgeous. How is that possible? Lita’s song is great too. 2004 had some awesome theme music. They lockup and go to the floor quickly. Lita takes over with a leg sweep for two. Remember that she’s the hometown girl. They go to the floor again and Lita tries a suicide dive and Lita lands ON HER HEAD, jacking her neck back in a landing that made my jaw drop and be stunned she isn’t dead. I mean she landed on her face and her feet hit her in the back of the head. The referee immediately checks on her and the crowd goes quiet.

The match keeps going as I guess she’s alive somehow. Trish takes the noseguard off and pops Lita in the face with it which isn’t a DQ somehow. Lita fights out of a choke and throws on a sleeper but gets countered into a seated full nelson. Trish goes up but gets caught in a superplex to put both girls down. Back up and the Chick Kick gets two. Trish pounds away in the corner and gets powerbombed to set up the moonsault but Trish breaks it up. Rollup gets two and Trish grabs a DDT for two. Stratusfaction is broken up and there’s a reverse Twist of Fate. The moonsault gives Lita her second title.

Rating: B. Considering that neck shot, WOW Lita was impressive here. At the end of the day, this was a solid match and they made it feel like a big moment. This was Lita’s second title, but she hadn’t won it in over four years so it’s not like this was something that happened every day. Trish would win it back in less than a month and hold it until Wrestlemania. As in the Wrestlemania the year after she won it, giving her a reign of about 15 months.

Here’s the rematch from New Year’s Revolution 2005.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Lita

How many times did these two fight, about a million? Ross calls it a tag title for no apparent reason. I love her theme song actually. Trish’s cleavage is big enough to hide a small country in. They fight for a bit before Trish goes to the floor. Lita goes to the apron and throws a Thesz Press at Trish, and rips HER knee to shreds.

Literally, two matches and two torn knees. She would be out for a few months also as she ripped her ACL. They actually continue the match though for about another three minutes before Lita just has nothing left and the Chick Kick gives Trish another title.

Rating: N/A. Not fair to grade them on this at all. As for a grade, I’d go with DD. That’s of course for Dogma and Dreams, which was my textbook in my political theory class. What did you think it was for?

That would be her last match for over a year as Lita would tear her knee to shreds and be out for the rest of 2005. She would return in early 2006 and chase the title for awhile longer before getting a shot at the vacant title after Trish retired as champion at Unforgiven. From Cyber Sunday 2006.

Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Lita

Trish retired so we had a four Diva tournament to set this up. Lita is about a month from retiring at this point so she’s more or less destined to win. Mickie throws the absolute worst dropkick anyone with a great rack has ever thrown. This is horrible but at least we get to look at Mickie’s figure. Lita as a heel just doesn’t work from an in ring perspective. She hooks on a sleeper that does fairly well.

Not that it wins or anything since it’s a freaking sleeper but nice try if nothing else. Instead of a match here, Lita seems like she’s just there doing moves on Mickie with no particular rhyme or reason. The girls do their thing of course and nothing of note is going on here at all. Lita blocks/Mickie botches the Stratusfaction and Mickie gets a rollup for two. The other Divas get involved and a spike DDT ends it for Lita.

Rating: D. This was very boring for the most part. The only highlights were Mickie’s hips and Lita’s chest. Other than that we were just sitting around watching this nonsense go on and on. The match never went anywhere as it’s clear Lita just didn’t care anymore. Mickie would win the title from Lita at Survivor Series in Lita’s retirement match.

Lita would retire after Survivor Series and go off to do whatever she did after leaving wrestling, including performing in a band. Nearly six years later, Heath Slater started bragging about being able to beat a bunch of legends. This led to an open challenge at Raw 1000.

Heath Slater vs. Lita

WOW. Lita still looks great too. Slater laughs this off but then accepts her challenge. The bell rings but Lita says she hired herself some protection. Cue the APA and Slater PANICS. Slater immediately runs but backs into every legend he’s fought in the last few weeks. They chase him back into the ring and the Twist of Fate sets up the Clothesline which sets up the Litasault (looked perfect) for the pin at 1:54.

Lita is one of the few women that was just awesome no matter when she was around. She was the high flying Diva that we hadn’t seen before and had that whole bad girl thing going with it. The injuries stopped her career cold multiple times though and cut her in ring time very short more than once. When you consider she got to the WWF in 2000 and retired at Survivor Series 2006 and factor out over two years due to injuries, she was only active in the company for four years. I doubt most people realize that. Anyway she was awesome when she was out there though and it never stopped working, much like those low riding pants.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Clash of the Champions at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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WWE.com’s Top 50 Talkers

These are always interesting.

50. Scott Steiner

49. Joel Gertner

48. Jimmy Valiant

47. Zeb Colter

46. New Jack

45. Grand Wizard

44. Brian Pillman

43. JBL

42. Thunderbolt Patterson

41. The Miz

40. Kevin Sullivan

39. William Regal

38. Taz

37. Stephanie McMahon

36. Ernie Ladd

35. Kurt Angle

34. Bray Wyatt

33. Rick Rude

32. Gary Hart

31. Ultimate Warrior

30. Michael PS Hayes

29. Nick Bockwinkle

28. Raven

27. Jesse Ventura

26. Jerry Lawler

25. Ted DiBiase

24. Terry Funk

23. Shawn Michaels

22. Harley Race

21. Edge

20. Captain Lou Albano

19. HHH

18. Randy Savage

17. Jim Cornette

16. CM Punk

15. Arn Anderson

14. Billy Graham

13. Vince McMahon

12. John Cena

11. Jake Roberts

10. Chris Jericho

9. Hulk Hogan

8. Bobby Heenan

7. Mick Foley

6. Paul Heyman

5. Dusty Rhodes

4. Steve Austin

3. Roddy Piper

2. The Rock

1. Ric Flair

I’m really not feeling Flair as #1 but this is WWE so ALL HAIL FLAIR. Cena not being in the top ten is highly questionable and I’d put Jericho above Dusty.

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Unforgiven 1999: Cracking Open A Six Pack

Unforgiven 1999
Date: September 26, 1999
Location: Charlotte Coliseum, Charlotte, North Carolina
Attendance: 15,779
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re in the HHH era here as the title is vacant after Vince of all people won it on Smackdown. He’s vacated it and tonight the main event is a 6 Pack Challenge for the belt with Rock, HHH, Mankind, Kane, Big Show and British Bulldog for the belt. I remember this match from back in the day and thought it was a great buildup. Something tells me I’ll be wrong. Other than that we have the Kennel From Hell match and a guy named Jericho is here now. Let’s get to it.

On a side note, there was an angle running here where the referees were on strike since HHH kept beating them up. It means something later on in the night but for the most part it’s just overbooking.

The intro is about the main event and has a Holy Grail theme. Sure why not. The voiceover guy speaks in Latin. That’s kind of cool. It’s saying a lot when Vince just walks into WCW’s stronghold and throws up a big PPV and draws 16,000 people. The referees are on strike so we have scabs tonight. We have a labor dispute on a wrestling show.

Val Venis vs. Steve Blackman

Venis had stolen Blackman’s bag of weapons for no apparent reason. Venis does his Joel Gertner imitation and shows that Gertner is better at it. The Brooklyn Brawler is the referee here. Blackman has on red shoes. Ok then. Venis has replaced the weapons with sex toys. Wow this is 1999 isn’t it? The crowd is relatively dead here but not entirely I guess. We hit the floor and it’s still mostly Blackman. This isn’t interesting in the slightest.

We hear about Taker walking out on Smackdown. He wouldn’t be back until June as the American Bad Guy. Sweet GOODNESS this is a boring match. Chyna could become the first female champion tonight. I knew Moolah and Richter were men in disguise! The crowd is totally dead now.

I haven’t seen one this bad in a long time. The Money Shot ends it with ease. This was awful. Blackman knocks him out with a kendo stick and medical people, one of which would become a Diva, comes to help him.

Rating: D-. VERY boring match here. I mean nothing happened at all and the crowd might as well have been watching a dark match. Just a terrible opener that had zero business being on a PPV. Hated it.

Big Show says he doesn’t know where Taker is. He’s RIPPED here if you can believe that.

We recap D’lo Brown vs. Mark Henry. This was an interesting angle as Henry was diagnosed with WAY high blood pressure and Brown was trying to get him healthy which ticked him off. Henry helped Jeff Jarrett win the Intercontinental/European Titles so he gave the European title to Henry. This is your rematch.

Henry hits on a VERY young Lillian Garcia. Sweet goodness she got hotter as she got older and she’s gorgeous here.

European Title: Mark Henry vs. D’Lo Brown

WOW they’ve picked two bad matches to start us off here. He’s Sexual Chocolate here. Tom Pritchard is the referee. Henry says there can’t be a match because Garcia slapping him hurt him. Brown actually got one heck of a push around this time if you can believe that. Brown could go in the ring if nothing else. Yes I liked him. Pritchard is wearing blue pants and it looks ridiculous. The crowd is somewhat alive here but not much.

They talk about Rebellion which is in 6 days. Yep, that’s coming too. Brown hits a Taker Dive over the ropes which looked great. This has been all Brown so far so expect that to change in a few seconds. Yep there it is. Good night Henry is limited in the ring. How has he not leaned anything new in like 15 years?

This is still just so boring. Brown is getting some pops if nothing else. Henry does the ten punch in the corner but gets powerbombed out of it and the Lo Down ends it. Nice ending to a terrible match.

Rating: D. Somewhat better but that’s not saying much. It was just ok and that’s mainly because I liked D’Lo. If nothing else they made it believable which is really all you can ask for here. Not bad. Ok yeah it was but it could have been worse.

The Acolytes say they’ll destroy the Dudleys. Bradshaw says they already destroyed one ECW team. That might have been the Public Enemy but I’m not sure. Chaz, the epitome of a failed gimmick, runs in and gets thrown out.

Debra and Miss Kitty say Jeff will lose. He was a total chauvinist at this point so Chyna beat him up and put on his tights. It was dumber than it sounds.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Chyna

This was one heck of a feud back in the day so this should get them awake for once. Miss Kitty looks insanely good here. Chyna was OVER back in the day. If she hadn’t been so self-obsessed she could have been something very special. Granted she was already but even bigger. This is the battle of the sexes so every woman in the world wants Chyna to take care of him. Harvey Whippleman is referee here.

I’d rather just look at Miss Kitty but whatever. Jarrett has issues punching Chyna which is understandable. Crowd POPS for Chyna doing anything and is dead otherwise. The show has been bad but not THIS bad. It’s interesting seeing someone use all kinds of offense other than just punches. It’s a nice change to see. Moolah and Mae are here. Chyna is in a sleeper and the crowd is breathing!!! Wow Chyna can’t do much in the ring. She would get a lot better.

She needs to hook the leg more too as it just looks sloppy when she doesn’t. That’s something Angle was always good at. He would almost always hook the leg and it makes him look much better. Figure four doesn’t work. There’s a chair shot for Jarrett and there’s no DQ for it so there we are.

The slowest Pedigree in the world doesn’t work and then Harvey stands there for like an hour so that a slingshot crushes him. Moolah and Mae come in and beat up Jarrett. Good night how did he get the WCW Title within a year? Ah good he hit them. And here’s Debra to further overbook things.

She knocks the heck out of Jarrett and Chyna gets the pin and the title to an ERUPTION. And here’s Tom Pritchard, the head scab referee, to point out what happened and reverse the decision. It’s Carolina so Dusty Finishes are required. I hate nonsense like this. You have a GREAT moment and now we have to mess it up. Pritchard gets beaten up anyway.

Rating: D+. Best match so far and still crap. Losses a lot of points because of the ending which was beyond idiotic. Not a bad match but just made my head hurt which is never good. Chyna would win it for good in an infamous match where Jarrett more or less legally held a gun to Vince’s head.

Rock says he’ll win.

Dudley Boys vs. Acolytes

The Dudleys are BRAND NEW here and are the hottest team in the world at the moment. The referee is Jimmy Korderas who wasn’t striking. Bubba has a stutter here. They were just so far ahead of every other team in the world at this time and it’s insane to see what they are today. What are you expecting here really? Bubba telegraphs a splash worse than anything I have ever seen as he jumps at Farrooq’s knees. That was horrible looking.

The Dudleys are in tie-dye here and it looks great. Lawler keeps making fun of Moolah and Mae Young which is very amusing yet totally evil and wrong. Again I have to ask, what does it mean to do something with authority? That makes no sense at all. This is your standard big old brawl and that’s all you could really ask for it to be.

Bradshaw gets an ok belly to back suplex off the top for two. And here’s Stevie Richards dressed like an Acolyte. He kicks D-Von and Bradshaw pins him. Ok then. To say a lot, Bradshaw is the only non ECW guy in there. Yeah it meant a lot.

Rating: D. Way too quick of a brawl here and it meant nothing. This show has been horrible and we’re just an hour into it so far. I was bored out of my mind here and I liked the Dudleys a lot back then. The ending was beyond stupid and it did the match no favors at all. Let’s just get this over with.

Ivory beats up Luna in the back and we’re having a hardcore Women’s Title match.

Women’s Title: Ivory vs. Luna Vachon

Ok then. They’re in an office and fighting with a copier and phone. Ivory is champion here in case you were wondering. It’s your standard match in this genre and is just various weapons shots and throwing people into things. Odd to see women doing it though. A splash onto some cardboard boxes as Luna channels her inner Foley. This is about as pointless as you could ask for. And here’s Tori to save Luna for no apparent reason. Ivory hits Luna with a wooden pole for the pin. That was as pointless as I could have imagined.

Rating: N/A. Way too short here. This was like 3 minutes long and very random. Yeah that’s all I’ve got.

Lillian is with Mae and Moolah and has the worst delivered line ever as she says What A Fight. It was Troll 2 levels of awful. Mae and Moolah beat up Ivory. Why did they get two segments again?

Tag Titles: Edge/Christian vs. New Age Outlaws

Edge and Christian are young faces here and asked for a title match on Heat. How weird is it that Edge and Christian would be light years ahead of the Outlaws at the end of the day? The Outlaws are freshly reunited here and the pop is noticeably quieter. And I’m wrong as they’re WAY into the Road Dogg entrance stuff. Edge and Gunn start us off. Korderas is refereeing again which is good as there shouldn’t be any drama here.

This was when Gunn was still bearable in the ring so this is decent to start off with. Edge and Christian were young and awesome at this time so this is a fun match on paper. More or less no way they were going to win though as the Outlaws had just won the belts recently. Lawler asks Ross if he likes it doggy style. That’s just wrong. The Outlaws are showing off here which you NEVER see. It’s not bad actually. Edge is WAY into steroids here as he’s ripped to shreds here.

I don’t know if I believe this but I think the Outlaws are having a good standard tag match here. What in the heck am I watching? You could tell that the challengers were going to be awesome at some point in the future. What would be called Poetry in Motion when the Hardys used it misses.

Gunn gets the hot tag and he just starts cleaning house with a  NICE powerslam. This is a solid match actually. And here are the Hardys and Gangrel. They beat up Edge and Christian so the Fameasser ends it. Screw this good match thing! We want RUN INS! Russo was gone but still being felt at this time I guess.

Rating: B. Solid stuff here as they went back and forth with the Outlaws showing that they could go when they wanted to. This of course makes me want to know: why didn’t they do it more often? It’s a shame they didn’t as this was awesome. Of course Edge and Christian would have their time.

We recap Smackdown where Bulldog beat up Rock for a reason that was never explained but whatever. Bulldog says he’s not with HHH.

Boss Man says he isn’t afraid of the match.

Hardcore Title: Al Snow vs. Big Boss Man

This is the infamous Kennel From Hell match where there were rottweilers between a Hell in a Cell cage and a regular cage. The idea here is that Snow had a dog named Pepper and cooked him to get a title shot. It’s dumber than it sounds. This was on a DVD somewhere with Foley and Kevin Kelly on commentary making it sound like a classic match. The idea was that the dogs were there to make the match more dangerous but they wound up screwing each other. Yep that sums up the match pretty well.

The commentary here is hilarious as they try to make this sound epic and it’s just failure all around. And there’s the bell but we have no dogs. Ok then. If nothing else we get the big blue cage. That never gets old. Ah there they are. Something tells me this is going to suck. Snow, you’re better than this. You really are. Boss Man is on the cage and Snow is in the ring in case you’re wondering for some odd reason. We get a bowling shoe line.

You know this would be a lot more intimidating if the dogs weren’t on leashes. The fans are shall we say not incredibly interested in this match. All they’re doing is just barking at each other for now. This is beyond idiotic. I mean what in the heck were they thinking when they came up with this?

If you want to have a cage match then have a freaking cage match, but don’t do this. They’re doing nothing of note here as it’s more or less all jobber level offense since there’s nothing else to do. Snow’s weapons are helping about as much as the dogs are here.

Seriously the fans do not care here at all. Boss Man is bleeding. Boss Man ripped open part of the top of the Cell in case I forgot to mention that which I think I did. For some reason Lawler is imitating an Australian accent. Ok then. It’s more interesting if nothing else.

In a sick shot, Snow is face down on the mat and Boss Man blasts him in the back of the head with a shovel. And Snow is handcuffed to the ring or the cage or something. And now he broke the cuffs. Is there a point to any of this? No? Ok just checking. Head makes his return and knocks Boss Man out so Snow can leave. What a joke.

Rating: Y. As in why did someone think this was a good idea? This wasn’t a match and it became apparent that this was going to suck very quickly. Not so much terrible as it was a disaster with no drama and no one cared so they had to kind of abort it, which was best for all of us. Just stupid but you can’t blame that on the wrestlers really.

Mankind imitates Rock which is always funny.

Chris Jericho vs. X-Pac

This was also added from Heat. Jericho has Mr. Hughes with him of all people. He’s been here less than two months here so there you are. Shamrock dropped out and left the company so we have X-Pac filling in. It’s weird seeing one cage wall up. Hughes out of his suit is just weird looking beyond belief. Tom Pritchard is referee again with the blue pants of doom. Jericho is already over but nowhere near the level he would hit.

Jericho says he’s here to save the PPV. Well someone has to. Pac surprisingly gets a pop. There you are X. This should be good since Waltman is always better against small guys which Jericho certainly is. This should be better than Jericho vs. Shamrock if nothing else. They start off very fast paced with a nice technical sequence ending with both guys nipping up. Have I mentioned how much I freaking hate the Bronco Buster? X Factor is countered into the Walls which don’t connect either.

Waltman hits a nice dive over the ropes. Hughes just needs to go far away. To be fair though he’s FAR skinnier here than he usually is. Pritchard needs to do the same as Hughes. He’s annoying too. I love that missile dropkick Jericho does. It’s so freaking crisp. Both guys are getting booed pretty solidly here which is rather weird to say the least. Jericho is the clear heel here in case you were wondering.

We hit the chinlock which is ok once you’ve been going at it for 7 minutes or so. Good bit different than when you hit it after like 2 minutes. And now they’re kind of chanting for X-Pac. Weird crowd but it could be due to them being bored to death earlier. Hughes interferes like the annoying twat waffle that he is. Jericho from this era is just so awesome it’s hard to describe. He’s a totally different worker now and it’s saying a lot that he can change so easily.

Pac hits a nice springboard clothesline. This is working as it’s not just basic moves and standard stuff. They’re opening up the playbooks a bit here and it’s working rather well. Still no Bronco Buster so my life still rocks. If this was how Pac worked all the time, I’d be perfectly fine with him. This has been entertaining.

Lawler finally makes a joke about Pritchard’s pants as we hit Jericho’s double powerbomb which is a sweet move. And now he’s in the Tree of Woe and we get an upside down Bronco Buster. Hughes runs in and beats up the referee and Pac for the CHEAP DQ. Road Dogg makes the save.

Rating: B. Fun match all around here. Like I’ve said many times, when Pac is out there with a guy close to his size, he’s FAR more entertaining to say the least. Against giants he’s just flat out boring as the realistic part goes out the window. Here his offense is believable and he’s on a level playing field. This was a fun match and I enjoyed it. Get rid of the AWFUL ending and a real referee and this is likely an A.

We recap the main event which is mainly about HHH. HHH had more or less been robbed at Summerslam before winning the title the next night which was a true shocker. He injured Austin after the match. Oh and HHH broke Ross’ arm. He held the title three weeks or so as Vince beat him at Smackdown which was very odd. Austin came back and beat the heck out of HHH as you would expect.

We get highlights, if you can call them that, of Vince winning the title. For no apparent reason this is all told via text cards as there is no commentary over the music. Austin is made referee due to the strike. On Smackdown 3 days prior to this HHH had had five matches in one night: all gimmick matches.

He had a Chokeslam Challenge with Big Show, an Inferno Match with Kane, a Boiler Room Brawl with Mankind, a Casket Match with Mideon and Viscera who subbed for Taker and a Brahma Bullrope Match with Rock. He won 3 of 5 to stay in the match here tonight. I distinctly remember that night for some reason. Anyway let’s get to the main event.

WWF Title: HHH vs. British Bulldog vs. Rock vs. Big Show vs. Mankind vs. Kane

Remember this is two in the ring and tagging in and out with Austin as guest referee. Oh ok Austin is enforcer and Korderas is the regular referee. That helps a bit. Entrances of course take a LONG time as you would expect them to here. Kane is rocking the mainly black outfit with red mixed in. Always loved that. So Chyna is a face on her own and a heel here. Ok then. She turned more than Team 3D does now if that tells you anything.

Rock gets a nice pop but not epic like he would get after Austin left. He’s walking a lot slower than he usually does too. That’s just odd. THERE’S your big pop for Austin. That’s more like it. The crowd is alive at least. Ross gets a solid shot at WCW by saying he’s never heard an ovation like this in Charlotte for any athlete. Austin does commentary. Rock and Bulldog start us off. Thankfully Smith is wearing long tights here.

It’s weird hearing Austin cursing every other word in today’s wrestling environment. It’s Kane and HHH here as I’m not going to try to keep up with all the tags here. I like the tagging ideas here as we don’t have to deal with the massive chaos. That’s just annoying otherwise. Austin wants to finish his six pack before the Six Pack match ends. They’re starting slow here which is fine as they have a good deal of time, over twenty minutes, to work with.

Austin is so freaking entertaining it’s scary. He wants to know where you mail the paychecks to a guy in Parts Unknown. That’s a very good question. How do you get a flight there? We get Kane vs. Big Show which is an epic rivalry. I mean think of how long those two have feuded for.

And we’re back to the beginning pairing as we have Bulldog vs. Rock. Solid stuff so far and having Austin on commentary is helping. He would be leaving in a few months to have neck surgery so I’m guessing he’s on commentary to give him time off. Smart if nothing else.

How weird is it to think that Austin wouldn’t have the world title for over a year and a half from this point? As great as he was, he didn’t hold the title for like 20 months in the Attitude Era. That’s often forgotten. Foley and HHH are in the aisle and there goes Rock with them. Ross calls a low blow on HHH a unique form of birth control. Considering Stephanie was just announced as pregnant again, that’s rather funny.

Naturally they’re all on the floor now. SICK Texas Piledriver on the stairs to HHH from Mankind. That sounded AWFUL. This has been really good so far in case you were wondering. Foley tags Rock in so he can have a chance to win the title. Foley’s character was so far ahead of everyone else’s no one could see him. And the referees cross their picket lines to complain about Korderas crossing the picket lines. This is freaking stupid. Rock beats up Big Show as some things never change.

Rock steals Austin’s beer to a BIG pop. Odd. Foley is up from a Kane tombstone in like 8 seconds. Not good Mick. It’s finishers a go-go here as it’s a mess that you knew it would come down to. Mandible Claw to Rock which gets Austin fired up. Show goes off and just beats the tar out of everyone. He chokeslams Foley and the other referees pull out Korderas. Dang it how stupid can you freaking get??? Austin takes over as referee.

Thankfully he beats up the referees as he should since they’re freaking morons. It’s Rock and HHH in the ring and Rock goes for the People’s Elbow which gets two as Show pulls Austin out and Rock takes a chair shot. HHH gets a Pedigree on Rock 10 seconds after the Rock Bottom and Elbow for the title. Ok then. At least Foley isn’t the only one not selling today. Austin beats him up and beers all around ends it.

Rating: B+. Solid stuff here. I really liked it as they gave them time and it never felt like it was out of control or anything like that which is a very nice touch. Other than Taker or Austin you couldn’t ask for a bigger lineup either. This was a solid and very entertaining match that didn’t feel anywhere near like the twenty minutes it got which is a very good sign. Very fun and solid match which works very well to close the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Well there are three good matches and the rest is awful. However, those three get the most time and two are the final matches on the show so I can’t complain. They got it right as they focused on the good stuff and gave the bad stuff limited time. It’s hard to complain about the Kennel match as some stuff in it was beyond their control.

They threw something out there and it hasn’t been referenced since so that’s a good sign. Anyway, this isn’t worth seeing as a whole but the last hour or so is plus the tag title match. Watch those three as they’re solid but don’t bother at all with the rest. I’d say go to Youtube for this.

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